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"I&amp;#039;m not sure if I mentioned before, but when Peter and I were together, we also had the guardianship of an older relative who has both physical and cognitive disabilities. I adore the guy, but when you&amp;#039;re a long-term caretaker of someone with those kind of special needs (and also the parent of a special needs child in addition), it can really put a lot of stress on your family life. There&amp;#039;s simply no down time, ever. Other couples got to put their kids to bed and spend an hour or two reconnecting, sharing their days, cuddling on the couch or just decompressing. We still had a family member who was as emotionally needy as the kids and in need of care and attention sitting in the living room with us every night. Add him into family trips and it could get really strained sometimes. He had very specific issues and they didn&amp;#039;t always gel well with the kids or with anything we were trying to accomplish. On top of that, we could almost never get a sitter because all the teenage girls who sat kids weren&amp;#039;t comfortable also sitting an older guy like him, so we rarely got a night away from it all. It was definitely a key issue that added stress to our marriage. One of the things I tried to gently insist on with Peter was that he ask his family to help out more. Peter has three other living siblings, and while none of them live close by, two of them are near enough that they could certainly take the relative for a visit a few times a year. The most we&amp;#039;d get is a week out of one brother every year, and a week every few years out of the other brother. Peter never asked them for more, even though he was the first one to complain that we never got a break. Let me tell you - those rare weeks off here and there were like a blast of fresh air. It helped recharge our batteries and the relative appreciated the time away visiting family that he missed. Since Peter left, they&amp;#039;ve all suddenly started pitching in. His relative has taken plenty of trips every year, and when Peter takes the kids on vacation with Stacie, the relative visits family so that Peter and the kids can do all the great stuff we had a hard time doing all those years. I just found out another family member is stepping up to the plate and taking the relative for the holidays. I know this is petty, but it kind of ticks me off. All those years, we could really have used a break and they never offered, and now that our marriage is in the dust, they&amp;#039;re helping out? Do they feel guilty? Is Peter finally growing a backbone and asking them to help? Or did Stacie put her foot down and insist that he ask them to share the burden a bit? I guess I&amp;#039;ll never know, but I&amp;#039;m glad for both Peter and his relative that it&amp;#039;s happening. They both need some time with other people every now and then.  Did your in-laws suddenly develop surprising behaviors after you split up? Did it annoy you? "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.womansday.com/relationships/dating-marriage/a47555/petty-but-it-irks/>