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"I give this groom two thumbs down. What do you think? Writes Save the Date reader Amaya: My boyfriend proposed in front of his family, at their ski house. I had barely said yes when he spit out, &amp;amp;#8220;We are NOT getting married in your hometown.&amp;amp;#8221; I chalked it up to nerves, but I got upset when I wanted to share the news with my parents and he insisted we had to &amp;amp;#8220;enjoy the moment&amp;amp;#8221; with his family, first. Okay, whatever. So six months into our engagement, we hadn&amp;amp;#8217;t made any wedding plans, but we moved in together&amp;amp;#8212;sort of. I put most of my stuff into storage and moved into his place. But he hasn&amp;amp;#8217;t gotten rid of any of his stuff, so I have no closet space or drawers. I feel like I&amp;amp;#8217;m just crashing there! Meanwhile, my fiance has told me not to talk to his parents if he&amp;amp;#8217;s not around. He&amp;amp;#8217;s also asked me not to bring up the wedding to him or his parents. (I don&amp;amp;#8217;t get it!) If someone else brings up the wedding and I chime in, his father shoots down my ideas with, &amp;amp;#8220;It isn&amp;amp;#8217;t JUST about the bride,&amp;amp;#8221; or &amp;amp;#8220;I KNOW that&amp;amp;#8217;s not what you want.&amp;amp;#8221; Then both of his parents get agitated and give me the silent treatment. Both of my fiance&amp;amp;#8217;s brothers married girls from other countries and had small weddings&amp;amp;#8212;mostly just family&amp;amp;#8212;in my fiance&amp;amp;#8217;s hometown. My fiance keeps implying that he knows I want a big wedding in MY hometown. But all I want is to marry him! Also, our families haven&amp;amp;#8217;t met each other. Every time I mention getting them together, my fiance changes the subject. I feel like my fiance thinks proposing to me was a mistake, but he doesn&amp;amp;#8217;t want to be the bad guy and call it off, so he&amp;amp;#8217;s trying to upset me enough that I pull the plug. Honestly, I&amp;amp;#8217;m about to. I&amp;amp;#8217;m starting to feel severely depressed. And kind of like I&amp;amp;#8217;m losing my mind. I love my fiance so much, and I love who were until we got engaged. I don&amp;amp;#8217;t like the person I&amp;amp;#8217;ve become or the couple we&amp;amp;#8217;ve become. I miss &amp;amp;#8220;us.&amp;amp;#8221; I&amp;amp;#8217;ve asked him if he would be willing to see a relationship counselor. His response, &amp;amp;#8220;If we need to see one before we&amp;amp;#8217;re even married, we&amp;amp;#8217;re in trouble.&amp;amp;#8221; Is that true? At this point, is there anything I can do to save our relationship? And is it even worth saving? Help! Here are my thoughts: Based on everything you&amp;amp;#8217;ve told me, I think this guy&amp;amp;#8217;s a jerk. As a rule, if a relationship is making you feel like you&amp;amp;#8217;re losing your mind, I think it&amp;amp;#8217;s a good idea to r-u-n in the other direction. This guy&amp;amp;#8217;s actions range from inconsiderate (&amp;amp;#8220;We&amp;amp;#8217;re NOT getting married in your hometown&amp;amp;#8221;) to mentally abusive. (You&amp;amp;#8217;re not allowed to bring up your WEDDING with your FIANCE? WTF?) I think you&amp;amp;#8217;re probably right: It sounds like he&amp;amp;#8217;s trying to make you end the relationship. Which leads me to believe either he wants the ring back&amp;amp;#8212;etiquette says he gets it back if you&amp;amp;#8217;re the one to bail&amp;amp;#8212;OR he just doesn&amp;amp;#8217;t want the rest of the world to know what a psycho he is. (&amp;amp;#8220;What? SHE left ME! I&amp;amp;#8217;m not the bad guy!&amp;amp;#8221;) Regardless, I don&amp;amp;#8217;t think it&amp;amp;#8217;s worth sticking around to find out his reasoning. If I were you, I&amp;amp;#8217;d leave. Quickly. Yes, the idea of walking out on someone you love is hugely upsetting. But what would you say to a girlfriend who was in your shoes? &amp;amp;#8220;You should hang out and see if things get better&amp;amp;#8221;? I don&amp;amp;#8217;t think so. I don&amp;amp;#8217;t know if your relationship has any chance of being salvaged, but things certainly aren&amp;amp;#8217;t going to get better while you&amp;amp;#8217;re living out of a suitcase or something in his home. I think you need to get yourself into a different space&amp;amp;#8212;mentally and physically. Ladies, what do you think? Does Amaya&amp;amp;#8217;s fiance just have a crazy case of cold feet? Or is he a big fat jerk? Oh, and for the record, I don&amp;amp;#8217;t think couples that go into therapy before they get married are doomed! Marriage is a HUGE deal! It&amp;amp;#8217;s a good idea to mentally prepare yourself! Have a wedding-y dilemma of your own? E-mail me! More readers&amp;amp;#8217; dilemmas, solved! * &amp;amp;#8220;I&amp;amp;#8217;m Marrying a Divorced Man. Will it Be &amp;amp;#8217;Til Death Do Us Part?&amp;amp;#8221; * &amp;amp;#8220;My Dates Always Choose Chain Restaurants, Which I Secretly Hate!&amp;amp;#8221; * &amp;amp;#8220;I Had a One-Night Stand. Now I Want to Date Him! How?&amp;amp;#8221; What&amp;amp;#8217;s With All the Spam in the Comments Section? Sick of all those annoying ads in the comments section lately? So are we! We police the site regularly and delete spam as soon as we can, but recently, the volume of spam has increased dramatically. We&amp;amp;#8217;re working on a way to block it permanently, so please bear with us, and know that we&amp;amp;#8217;re as eager as you are to get rid of these pests. Meanwhile, please continue to use the Report Abuse button to flag spam&amp;amp;#8212;it really does help!&amp;amp;#8212;and continue to leave your brilliant feedback below. If you have any urgent questions about the spam, please contact us. And a special note to you, spammers: We officially declare you a major DON&amp;amp;#8217;T. More Ways to Get Glamour Visit Shopglamour.com for cute stuff starting at just $10! Enter the latest Glamour sweepstakes! Follow us on Twitter Add us to your iGoogle homepage Photo: Thinkstock"^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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