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" I was 18 years old when I moved to Los Angeles from the Midwest. I had decided to become a professional waxer\u2014my mother is an aesthetician, so I was familiar with the business\u2014and I knew Los Angeles would have a never-ending supply of wannabe starlets and trophy wives who needed to be groomed. Now, five years later, business is booming: I&amp;#039;m never without a torso, face, or butt to wax. But back when I was 18, I never would have guessed what I would be waxing more than any other body part. Balls.  Mastering the Mankini Wax The first time a guy walked into my room, I was so terrified, I could hardly see straight\u2014not good when you&amp;#039;re combining hot wax and family jewels. I was 19, and the client was about 40. He looked like a straight-laced accountant: clean-shaven with neatly pressed clothes. I figured he wanted his private parts to be as impeccable as the rest of him. The sum total of my experience with waxing male genitalia consisted of watching one short video about it at beauty school. Thing is, you can only master a delicate procedure like that by actually doing it. The result? The accountant&amp;#039;s balls were flaming red by the time I was through with him. I removed at least one layer of skin and no doubt left him limping for days...but he didn&amp;#039;t complain. As my waxing skills improved, I got more confident doing the few guys I saw. Then a year ago, I started working at a brand-new salon that marketed itself to both men and women. I told the owners that I was an expert man waxer\u2014a little bit of a fib\u2014and so I became the go-to girl for handling dudes. Well, we couldn&amp;#039;t believe how many men started showing up to the salon. I think guys just needed a place that advertised specifically to them so that they didn&amp;#039;t feel like waxing was only for chicks. Most of the guys who come in are straight, successful, and good-looking. Sometimes I Google them and find out that they&amp;#039;re prominent entertainment executives and lawyers. They&amp;#039;re often married with kids. One of my favorite clients is a gorgeous Italian guy who&amp;#039;s rich, cocky, and flirtatious. I do his chest first, and while I do, I give him a little towel so he can cover up his privates, but he always tosses it aside and lies there with everything on display. He knows he is well-endowed and has a sick body, and he clearly loves to taunt me with it. Sadly, he has a girlfriend, so I can only hope they&amp;#039;ll break up when he realizes his perfect woman has had her face buried in his crotch all along. Breaking Them In Waxing a guy&amp;#039;s private parts is a whole lot more complicated than doing a woman&amp;#039;s. A girl can just lie there and zone out, but a guy needs to help me by holding his penis out of the way and pulling the skin on his testicles taut. The other day, I had a typical new customer come in: late 20s, cute, dressed casually. I called him Converse Guy because of his sneakers. He was hanging on my every word as I told him what to do, and I could see little drops of perspiration on his forehead. He was so nervous that when I touched his penis to demonstrate how to hold it, he didn&amp;#039;t even seem to notice...and I&amp;#039;m cute! He relaxed a little when I started with the skin surrounding his testicles, because that part doesn&amp;#039;t hurt all that much. I asked him if he had a girlfriend, and he said, &amp;quot;Of course! Do you think I&amp;#039;d be doing this if a woman weren&amp;#039;t making me?&amp;quot; Guys usually pretend that girls force them to do it, but I think they are secretly curious and then keep coming back because they like the clean feeling. &amp;quot;Don&amp;#039;t worry,&amp;quot; I assured him. &amp;quot;All my male customers tell me it&amp;#039;s beyond worth it.&amp;quot; I find that it&amp;#039;s key to let first-timers know that I have lots of other guys coming in so they don&amp;#039;t feel so self-conscious. Despite the small talk and the cranked AC, he was still sweating like crazy as I ripped the first strip of wax off his testicles. When I did, his whole body tensed up. The next strip must have hurt even more, because he screamed out &amp;quot;Oh, fuck!&amp;quot; A woman in the next treatment room who&amp;#039;d heard him started to laugh and hollered, &amp;quot;Come on, big guy, it doesn&amp;#039;t hurt that much!&amp;quot; From there on out, he managed to keep quiet, but a lot of guys are much bigger babies. I have one regular customer who looks supermacho, with massive muscles and a deep tan. But every five minutes, he whines, &amp;quot;I need a break! I need a break!&amp;quot; before getting up and pacing around the room, practically in tears. It was hilarious the first time, but now it&amp;#039;s annoying because it makes his sessions take forever. Oh, also? He wears a bright pink G-string every time. A few days after I waxed Converse Guy, he sent me an e-mail: &amp;quot;I can&amp;#039;t thank you enough. I love how clean and smooth it feels down there. I&amp;#039;ll definitely be in again.&amp;quot;   A Hard Question I know exactly what you&amp;#039;re wondering: Do guys ever get turned on? Well, it&amp;#039;s pretty rare. But I have to confess that I typically prefer it when a client is a little hard. The skin on his testicles gets stretched out, which makes it much easier to apply wax. I don&amp;#039;t ever tell them I like it, though\u2014I do not want to give them the wrong idea. Unfortunately, some of my customers are not nice guys with girlfriends. In fact, I&amp;#039;d say about a quarter of them are weirdos looking for something more than just grooming. I can ID these creeps the second they walk in. For one thing, if a guy has a shaggy head of hair or beard, I know he doesn&amp;#039;t care about grooming below his neck. Guys who are sloppily dressed are also suspect, and even glasses can be a tip-off. Think about it: A guy who&amp;#039;s vain enough to prune his package will care about his outward appearance and get contacts. I had what was probably my worst-ever customer last month: middle-age, overweight, messy beard. He would have fit in perfectly lurking around the X-rated section of a magazine stand. As soon as I got started, I had to fight back my gag reflex because he had clearly not showered for\u2026I don&amp;#039;t even want to think how long. Also, his penis immediately became hard. Like, not just a little bit\u2014we&amp;#039;re talking full salute. I was prepared for that, but I almost lost it when he started helping it along\u2014not full-on masturbating but rubbing and squeezing the tip. He had his head leaned back and a dreamy look on his face. I wanted to run out of the room, but instead, I slapped on wax as fast as I could and ripped it off without doing a thing to ease the pain. Sadly, he didn&amp;#039;t seem to mind. In fact, when I told him to move his equipment to the other side, he looked me right in the eye and in a hoarse voice said, &amp;quot;You know, baby, it&amp;#039;s easier if you pull on my penis.&amp;quot; Obviously, I refused. You might think I&amp;#039;m insane for not throwing him out the minute I saw what he was doing, but frankly, once I&amp;#039;ve had to see a gross guy&amp;#039;s erection, I figure I might as well get paid for it. And as much as I would have loved to scar him for life with some well-placed molten wax, I can&amp;#039;t risk a lawsuit. Oh, and here&amp;#039;s the worst part: When I went in to straighten up the room after he&amp;#039;d gotten dressed and left, I noticed that the towel he left behind was wet and sticky. I felt like scrubbing my entire body with bleach. Men and Wax Do Mix Every job has its downsides, but at least this one pays well. When I&amp;#039;m doing boyzilians, I make about $65 an hour, which is way more than I could make doing anything else I&amp;#039;m qualified for. Not to mention, my customer base grows all the time. Surprisingly, I&amp;#039;ve never dated a guy who had a problem with my profession. But I am dating a guy right now who has a friggin&amp;#039; carpet in his pants yet refuses to let me wax it. He claims he has unusually sensitive skin, but I think he&amp;#039;s just scared. Clearly, I have a lot of reasons to hope that it&amp;#039;ll soon be as normal for men to get waxed as it is for women. And honestly, I think one day it will. Almost all my legit customers get hooked and come back every month. They&amp;#039;re typically cute and extremely polite, and best of all, they tip well\u2014sorry, ladies, but guys tip way better than you do. Plus, this business seems to be recession-proof. That&amp;#039;s why every time I hear about a friend getting laid off, I thank heaven for hairy balls. 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<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/confessions/a3184/confessions-of-a-waxer/>