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"  Justin and I went back to my place after dinner, and I was noticeably quiet in the cab. I wasn&amp;#039;t trying to give him the silent treatment, I was just lost in my thoughts and trying to figure out how to bring up my concerns to him. &amp;quot;You okay?&amp;quot; Justin asked once we were in my room getting ready for bed.  &amp;quot;No, not really.&amp;quot;  Justin pulled his shirt off and sighed much more dramatically than he needed to. He climbed into bed and arranged the pillows behind his back so that he was sitting upright. His stomach had zero rolls and I couldn&amp;#039;t help but think how such natural muscle definition was wasted on someone who prefers vegetables over chocolate covered pretzels to begin with. Life is all kinds of unfair.  &amp;quot;Well, you asked,&amp;quot; I said.  &amp;quot;I know,&amp;quot; Justin said. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s just I thought you would say you were okay. We had such a good time tonight. I don&amp;#039;t understand how there is a problem right now.&amp;quot;  I put on my pajamas before I answered. You could tell someone their dog died and they won&amp;#039;t take you seriously if you&amp;#039;re doing the skinny jean wiggle-out while you deliver the news. And I needed Justin to absorb every word I was about to say.  &amp;quot;We did have a good time,&amp;quot; I said. &amp;quot;But your sister told me something when we went to the bathroom that really bothered me.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Oh God, what shit did Becca stir up now?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;She asked me what your problem was with the whole girlfriend thing.&amp;quot;  Justin buried his face in his hands. &amp;quot;This again?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Um, relax,&amp;quot; I said. &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;m not even finished.&amp;quot;  Justin took his hands away from his face and muttered, &amp;quot;Great.&amp;quot; This sulkiness was not a good look on him.  &amp;quot;She mentioned how your ex was a little\u2026pushy, and how that might have something to do with why you&amp;#039;re so hesitant to put a label on us.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I am so annoyed with Becca right now,&amp;quot; Justin said. &amp;quot;Annie is one of her best friends and she&amp;#039;s talking shit about her to the new girl I&amp;#039;m dating. It&amp;#039;s so slimy.&amp;quot;  That&amp;#039;s when the panic hit\u2014I hadn&amp;#039;t considered what would happen if Justin told his sister I told him what she told me (Wow, that is the most #ShitGirlsSay thing I&amp;#039;ve ever said). I couldn&amp;#039;t imagine Becca taking that well.  &amp;quot;Maybe it is, but that&amp;#039;s besides the point,&amp;quot; I said, trying to steer him away from that line of thinking.  &amp;quot;Which is\u2026.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Are you hesitant to make this,&amp;quot; I pointed from him to me and back to him again, &amp;quot;official, because you think if you do I&amp;#039;m going to demand a ring like yesterday.&amp;quot;  Justin sighed. Again. &amp;quot;Josie, it&amp;#039;s not that. Not exactly.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;So what is it?&amp;quot; The question came out much more shrill than I intended it to and I cleared my throat. &amp;quot;Sorry.&amp;quot; I lowered the octave to one that wouldn&amp;#039;t shrink a man&amp;#039;s balls. &amp;quot;What is it?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I just feel like\u2026a girl changes when she becomes your girlfriend. She expects more and I just have a lot going on right now and I don&amp;#039;t know if I can give you more than I already am.&amp;quot;  A thousand Joey Lawrence &amp;quot;Whoa&amp;#039;s&amp;quot; echoed in my head. Justin was right\u2014he didn&amp;#039;t have anything more to give me because he was already giving me everything a &amp;quot;boyfriend&amp;quot; is meant to give. I don&amp;#039;t know why he couldn&amp;#039;t see that he was playing a lead role\u2014just without the name credit.  &amp;quot;Justin,&amp;quot; I said. &amp;quot;I don&amp;#039;t expect anything more from you. I love&amp;quot;\u2014I saw his eyes go wide\u2014&amp;quot;Calm down! I was going to say I love what we have. But at this point in a relationship, when I&amp;#039;ve met a guy&amp;#039;s family, I spend almost every night with him, and I go on trips with him, I owe it to myself to ask for a real commitment.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;And you don&amp;#039;t think that my actions have given you that?&amp;quot; Justin countered. &amp;quot;Why is this label so important to you?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;That&amp;#039;s like asking why get married? Why eat chocolate? It just is. It&amp;#039;s what people do after they&amp;#039;ve been seeing each other for a while and things are going well. You&amp;#039;re already doing all of the things &amp;#039;the label&amp;#039; obliges you to do anyway, so why is not having it so important to you?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I just don&amp;#039;t want things to change,&amp;quot; Justin repeated. &amp;quot;I don&amp;#039;t want to like, go out with my friends and have you get mad at me because I&amp;#039;m not going out with you.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;What?&amp;quot; I was getting pissed off. I&amp;#039;ve never done anything to make Justin think I would be that kind of girl. &amp;quot;When have I ever kept you from doing what you want to do? Also, I have friends I want to go out with too\u2014you think I just cut them out of my life when I get a boyfriend and expect the guy to do the same? It&amp;#039;s like you&amp;#039;re living in some Two and a Half Men episode where all women are these fun-sucking demons who want to make sure men have as little freedom as possible. Do you know me at all?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Okay, okay, I get it,&amp;quot; Justin said.  We sat in silence for a moment. Finally I spoke up. &amp;quot;Look, you don&amp;#039;t need to give me an answer right now. Just think about it. I like you so much and I think we have a great thing going. But I also need to do what&amp;#039;s right for me.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;So if I don&amp;#039;t call you my girlfriend, that&amp;#039;s it, you&amp;#039;re done?&amp;quot; Justin challenged.  &amp;quot;If that&amp;#039;s what you got out of this then you&amp;#039;re just missing the point entirely,&amp;quot; I said, sadly. I just wanted Justin to see that we were so much more than just two people dating. I wanted him to give me the respect I deserved, not chain him up and lock away the key.  &amp;quot;I guess I am then.&amp;quot; Justin pulled a pillow out from behind his back and reclined in bed. I slipped underneath the covers and turned out the light, blinking back tears. How had the night gone so sour, so fast?  Want more from Josie? Follow her on Twitter @bedroomblog. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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