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"Some of you naysayers have scoffed that I&amp;#039;m cliche for reading the old standby Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus by Dr. John Gray. But I&amp;#039;m holding my ground that this guide rocks. Every week I pick up a new nugget of information to apply to my marriage and sex life. Like Chapter 4: Sue is ready to divorce, complaining, &amp;quot;...she had been giving more than he had for twelve years and could not take it any more. She blamed Jim for being lethargic, selfish, controlling and unromantic.&amp;quot; The good doctor has a three step medicinal cure for this situation. 1. MOTIVATION: Jim needs to hear what Susan has to say and not argue. Before any of you women start screaming at your computers, &amp;quot;Yeah! He better start listening to her. If I do one more thing around here...&amp;quot; check out advice #2. 2. RESPONSIBILITY: While Jim needed to take responsibility for not supporting Susan (Yeah!) she needed to take responsibility for not setting boundaries. (Huh? What was that last part?) Being a natural giver, I was a bit irked at Gray blaming Susan for her marital downfall. After all, how much childcare, housework and financial burden can one woman handle?  &amp;quot;I have asked Rex plenty of times for domestic help!&amp;quot; I grumbled to myself. &amp;quot;Sometimes he just doesn&amp;#039;t get it.&amp;quot; But then, as I read on, and started seeing some relatable core differences between men and women, I understood that while I was asking for support, I wasn&amp;#039;t exactly doing it at a time Rex was hearing me - 11:30PM, for example. While I was ready to talk complain about my day, he was ready for forget about his, often by having sex. It&amp;#039;s not that Rex didn&amp;#039;t care. It&amp;#039;s was about catching him at the right moment. Same goes true for me. He used enter the house from work and immediately nit pick, &amp;quot;Honey, you left the hose on again.&amp;quot; Knee deep in cranky kids, with dinner simmering on the stove and two articles due, I wasn&amp;#039;t hearing his cry for support. Instead, I saw criticism - thankless hen peck hecking about all I was messing up on. Step 3 talks about how to navigate these tricky waters: 3. PRACTICE: Sue needed to learn to say no. So did I. Maybe you do also. Did you know that you don&amp;#039;t have to agree to every social event out there for your husband and children? In fact, I have told Rex that every Wednesday night is my night. The kids will be in bed by 6:30 and I&amp;#039;m going to do whatever I want. He was fine with that. I now feel gloriously free to thrift store shop or hang out in book stores - all things I&amp;#039;d normally drag him to. I look forward to it all week. And guess who is getting a lot more sex because his wife is setting limits? Good guess. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/life/relationships/a2675/if-you-want-sex-leave-me-alone/?src=shelter_footer>