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"InTouch magazine published a series of stories listing Lindsay Lohan&amp;#039;s celebrity conquests a few months back, after getting hold of a sex list she&amp;#039;d allegedly written. (Blame BuzzFeed.) During an appearance on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen back in April, Lindsay confirmed the list&amp;#039;s legitimacy, explaining she&amp;#039;d written it as part of a rehab program. Though named as one of her partners, James Franco denied having sex with Lohan, instead saying they maybe made out once when they both lived for a while in swanky Los Angeles hotel Chateau Marmont, but that was all. He also called her delusional, which seems a bit rude, really. And Franco has now written a very thinly veiled account of their time together that heady LA summer, in a short story called Bungalow 89. It&amp;#039;s part of a new fiction issue of Vice magazine, though it reads less as fiction and more like &amp;quot;fiction,&amp;quot; like The Devil Wears Prada \u2014 just about celebrity sexytimes instead of fashion magazines. Of course, it&amp;#039;s a James Franco piece, so it&amp;#039;s also peppered with lots of humblebrag asides about his famous friends, and meandering paragraphs meant to prove he&amp;#039;s so far above Hollywood&amp;#039;s overindulgent hoopla that he&amp;#039;s, well, on another planet. (Sure, he&amp;#039;ll come along to your A-list parties, but only because they offer good material for his journal.) All this stuff is much less interesting than the sections about LiLo anyway, though \u2014 the Lohan narrative appears to be one shorter story spread throughout the larger piece, recounting their one night of their coupling that&amp;#039;s, again, sans copulation. Here&amp;#039;s how it all goes: First, Lindsay tries to break into James&amp;#039;s room like it&amp;#039;s no big deal: &amp;quot;There was a Hollywood girl staying at Chateau Marmont. She had gotten a key to my room from the manager. I heard her put the key into my front door and turn it, but I had slid the dead bolt and that thing \u2014 I don&amp;#039;t know what you call it; it&amp;#039;s like a chain but made of two bars \u2014 that kept the door from opening. &amp;quot;She said, &amp;#039;James, open the door.&amp;#039;&amp;quot; But that doesn&amp;#039;t work, so she just calls his room instead. James picks up, and their conversation goes as follows: &amp;quot;&amp;#039;I just want to sleep on your couch. I&amp;#039;m lonely.&amp;#039; &amp;quot;&amp;#039;We&amp;#039;re not going to have sex. If you want to come in, I&amp;#039;ll read you a story.&amp;#039; &amp;quot;&amp;#039;A bedtime story?&amp;#039;&amp;quot; Then she&amp;#039;s back outside James&amp;#039;s room. This time, she knocks: &amp;quot;She was in her pajamas. She had bare feet.&amp;quot; And maybe Franco&amp;#039;s telling a story within a story, or maybe he really did read Lindsay J. D. Salinger stories in bed: &amp;quot;Once upon a time a guy, a Hollywood guy, read some Salinger to a young woman who hadn&amp;#039;t read him before. Let&amp;#039;s call this girl Lindsay. She was a Hollywood girl, but a damaged one. I knew that she would like Salinger, because most young women do. I read her two of the Nine Stories, &amp;#039;A Perfect Day for Bananafish&amp;#039; and &amp;#039;For Esm\u00E9 \u2014 with Love and Squalor.&amp;#039; &amp;#039;Bananafish&amp;#039; was great because it has a nagging mother on the other end of the phone line, nothing like Lindsay&amp;#039;s real mother, but still, the mother-daughter thing was good for her to hear.&amp;quot; No sex, remember!  &amp;quot;Now we were lying in bed. I wasn&amp;#039;t going to fuck her. She had her head on my shoulder. She started to talk. I let her.&amp;quot; Though they do sleep together, and it&amp;#039;s poignant: &amp;quot;I ran my fingers through her hair and thought about this girl sleeping on my chest, our fictional Hollywood girl, Lindsay. What will she do? I hope she gets better. You see, she is famous. She was famous because she was a talented child actress, and now she&amp;#039;s famous because she gets into trouble. She is damaged. For a while, after her high hellion days, she couldn&amp;#039;t get work because she couldn&amp;#039;t get insured. They thought she would run off the sets to party. Her career suffered, and she started getting arrested (stealing, DUIs, car accidents, other things). But the arrests, even as they added up, were never going to be an emotional bottom for her, because she got just as much attention for them as she used to get for her film performances. She would get money offers for her jailhouse memoirs, crazy offers. So how would she ever stop the craziness when the response to her work and the response to her life had converged into one? Two kinds of performance, in film and in life, had melted into one.&amp;quot; That last line about the &amp;quot;two kinds of performance&amp;quot; seems to sum up Franco&amp;#039;s story-within-a-story. You should read &amp;quot;Bungalow 98&amp;quot; in full over at Vice, mostly to see if you can make sense of it. Because I&amp;#039;m still not sure.  RELATED: A Definitive Ranking of All the Celebrities Lindsay Lohan Has Allegedly Slept With A Definitive Ranking of All the Celebrities Lindsay Lohan Has Allegedly Slept With (Part 2) Follow Alex on  Twitter. Photo credit: Ray Tamarra / Getty Images "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/entertainment/news/a26571/james-franco-lindsay-lohan-bedtime-stories/>