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" Each morning, we will read the Internet so you don&amp;#039;t have to. Here are our takeaways: WHAT YOU NEED TO CAPTURE A 727-POUND ALLIGATOR   &amp;quot;A bright light, a crossbow attached to a 150-pound fishing line, a deep-sea fishing pole with a snagging hook, a shotgun, Mountain Dew and root beer,&amp;quot; apparently.  HOW TO KEEP YOUR EGO IN CHECK EVERY TIME   Take a minute and read these words about the world and us.  STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW BUSY YOU ARE   It&amp;#039;s a destructive, bullshit way of trying to one-up someone.  DON&amp;#039;T MAKE YOUR KID CRASH HIS SCOOTER   Though if he&amp;#039;s fine and you catch it on Vine, it&amp;#039;s not so bad, we guess.  INSTEAD, TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMETHING USEFUL   Like treasure hunting, so that you all can find $300,000 worth of 150-year-old gold chains and coins from a shipwreck off of the Florida coast.  "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/news/a24624/before-we-begin-090413/?click=news>