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" My sex is female, however I feel more confident/sexy/comfortable wearing mens clothing. I often am mistaken for a male, and it makes me feel incredibly awkward. While I absolutely do not like labels, where exactly do I fit within the gender spectrum? -Age 21 Well, Dannielle is right there with you. She&amp;#039;s been called &amp;quot;sir&amp;quot; more times than she can count and it makes her uncomfortable every single time. The way we choose to express ourselves in dress or appearance is not always an indicator of how we identify \u2014 which means that it would be extremely difficult for us to tell you where you fit on the gender spectrum based on your style choices alone. You&amp;#039;ve expressed that you don&amp;#039;t identify as male, and it sounds as though you may not be questioning your gender at all, but are actually just bothered by the fact that others are questioning your gender based on your appearance alone. There are two concepts at play in your question (and in all of our experiences): Gender identity and gender expression. Gender identity is how we feel about who we are, while gender expression is how we choose to dress and otherwise appear outwardly. Sure, there are some people who prefer to dress in a more masculine manner and also identify as male, but there are plenty of us out here whose gender expression or style of dress doesn&amp;#039;t line up exactly with how we identify! People tend to get caught up in the idea that our identities align with our clothing \u2014 most likely because we are raised to understand that there are boy clothes and girl clothes, boy toys and girl toys, boy jobs and girl jobs, and nothing else. That isn&amp;#039;t the truth of the matter, though! There are tons of styles of dress, and many more than two genders. Your style of dress is just that: your style of dress. To be totally honest, we should all be able to wear what we want, how we want, and not have that inform the gender assumptions of those around us. If you feel comfortable correcting those around you who make those assumptions, you should do so \u2014 but if you don&amp;#039;t, it isn&amp;#039;t your obligation. Feeling uncomfortable (and even totally bummed out) when others misgender you is a very valid feeling. It is a huge part of the reason why we should all work to remember that gender is not something that is an either/or experience, and that the way we look is not an indicator of how we identify. By the way, if you don&amp;#039;t like labels, you do not have to choose one. We know that there is a lot of pressure from all sides to define who we are by using words and categories, but some of us just want to be us, and don&amp;#039;t feel like we fit in any particular category. You can just be you, and if anyone tells you that you must find a &amp;quot;place on the spectrum&amp;quot; or a word to explain your identity, tell them you&amp;#039;d like to see their gender police badge and search warrant. Then do this:  strong&amp;gt;A girl asked me out and I want to say yes, but I&amp;#039;m not sure that I&amp;#039;m gay. I am attracted to her, but what if I don&amp;#039;t like it? How do I know if I&amp;#039;m gay?!?!!? -Age 21 IT IS GOING TO BE OKAY, WE PROMISE. DEEP BREATHS. Here&amp;#039;s what you do. You go on the date. Then, you re-evaluate. You do not need to have a permission slip from the lesbian mafia in order to go on a date with someone who is the same gender as yourself. You might fall in love with this girl and get married and have babies and make all your shirts from rainbow fabric for the rest of your life. You might love kissing her and realize you want to kiss all the girls all the time. You might have a great date, think you are sooooo attracted to her, then get back to her house and realize six seconds into making out that this just isn&amp;#039;t your thing. The point is that you will never know your feelings unless you explore your feelings. Eh?  Bottom line: Dating is dating is dating. If you&amp;#039;re attracted to a girl who asked you out, you should say yes. Figure out the rest as it comes. AY-OH. Kristin Russo lives in New York City and holds a master&amp;#039;s degree in gender studies. Dannielle Owens-Reid lives in Los Angeles where she rehearses stand-up comedy in front of her cat. Together they run the website everyoneisgay.com. Do you have questions or topic requests for Kristin and Dannielle? Ask them HERE. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a6036/lesbian-gay-advice/>