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"Jesse James is in the news again, with an excerpt from his book discussing his life and his split from Sandra Bullock. It turns out he felt the need to cheat repeatedly on Sandra Bullock in order to assert his &amp;quot;independence&amp;quot;. Right.  Jesse goes on to talk about an incident where the two of them were in the car, and Sandra asked him to lower the volume on his music. He somehow felt trapped by that \u2013 like doing as she asked (some people would call that &amp;quot;manners&amp;quot;) was an attempt to keep him from being who he really was. Oh, please. Any man who looks at a concession to common courtesy as an attack on his personal sense of self needs to realize (and the quicker the better) that he&amp;#039;s not cut out for marriage. Marriage is giving in, in a hundred different ways. It&amp;#039;s compromise. It&amp;#039;s also having the sense of perspective to realize which concessions are courteous or compassionate, or just plain no big deal, and which are deal-breakers. I daresay if having to lower the volume on the radio has you seeing red and feeling like your &amp;quot;authentic self&amp;quot; is being oppressed, you have a lot of issues that infidelity isn&amp;#039;t going to solve for you. It&amp;#039;s true that some women make the mistake of marrying a man hoping to change him. But I think it&amp;#039;s equally true than some men make the mistake of expecting everyone else to adjust to them and their needs so they can feel like they haven&amp;#039;t lost anything of themselves. Just my two cents, but if you lose something of yourself gaining some manners, I don&amp;#039;t think you&amp;#039;ve lost much worth keeping. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.womansday.com/relationships/dating-marriage/a43030/oh-grow-up-jesse-james-8077/?src=shelter_footer>