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" I&amp;#039;ll tell you what. That Scarlett Johansson is so F-ing bilaterally symmetrical. Dayum. It&amp;#039;s like God put a mirror down the middle of her face. Mmm-mm. And that makes me think that she experienced relatively low oxidative stress in the womb, meaning she is more likely to be healthy, which means that she is more likely to be fertile, and that if I breed with her, I will have a higher chance of spreading my DNA. Oh yeah. And that, my friends, is why she&amp;#039;s a woman we love. So goes the argument of evolutionary psychology \u2014 perhaps the trendiest of scientific theories about humans right now. Evolutionary psychology says we are ruled by our unconscious caveman instincts, which were forged over millions of years of evolution. It says men (and women) find certain features attractive because they signal fertility. Beauty is in the eye of the ancient breeder. I&amp;#039;m not dismissing it totally. A lot of evolutionary psychology is speculative and pseudo-scientific, but some of it \u2014 perhaps much of it \u2014 is probably true. Along with facial symmetry, which is apparently a turn-on across cultures, evolutionary psychologists talk about the worldwide allure of big lips, which are a sign of youth. (Lips get thinner as we age; so an inflated kisser is more likely to be of child-bearing age). And big eyes and a small chin and unblemished skin (also a sign of youth). A low hip ratio (small waist, big hips) might mean better child-bearing capacity. Apparently 7:10 is the ideal. And why are we attracted to Lake Bell&amp;#039;s (or Megan Boone&amp;#039;s or Lolo Jones&amp;#039;s) breasts? There are two evolutionary theories here. First, that the boobs resemble the buttocks, which is the real Paleolithic jackpot (almost all male mammals except for humans mate from behind). Or second, because evolution hijacked the &amp;quot;neural circuitry originally evolved to strengthen the mother-infant bond, and now uses it... to strengthen the bond between couples,&amp;quot; as one pop science publication put it. We like boobs because we liked them as infants. So men are big babies. No surprise there. Again, there are limits to evolutionary psychology. First of all, culture still plays a huge part in beauty, of course. Exhibit A: Mayan Indians found crossed eyes gorgeous, and would dangle an object in front of their babies&amp;#039; eyes to induce the condition. Exhibit B-Z: The millions of weird fetish websites on the Internet devoted to fans of obese women, amputees, etc. But as I say, there&amp;#039;s probably something to a universal standard of beauty based on health and fertility. I was probably attracted to my wife&amp;#039;s larger-than-average eyes, small chin, and buttocks-like breasts. That may have been why I initially loved her. But I&amp;#039;d argue that I now love her for different reasons. And one of them is that she makes me want to be a better man. Yes, I just quoted Jack Nicholson in that romantic comedy with Helen Hunt. If you complain, I&amp;#039;ll quote The Truth about Cats &amp;amp;amp; Dogs in my next article. My wife has made me more compassionate. Or maybe slightly less dickish. I may not be in Haiti with Sean Penn, but thanks to my wife, I&amp;#039;m far more aware that there are other people in the world, and that my actions affect those people. I&amp;#039;m far more likely to, for instance, wipe the spilled guac off my table at Chipotle before leaving. I know! Give me my Nobel Peace Prize now. Recently I discovered some science to back up this hunch. Turns out women do, in general, make us better men. Adam Grant, a professor at the Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania, writes about studies that show the presence of women makes men more generous. There&amp;#039;s a reason that Bill Gates credits Melinda Gates in his conversion from pure capitalist to philanthropist. So that&amp;#039;s one big reason we should love women, even the asymmetrical ones with thin lips. PLUS: Scarlett Johansson Is the Sexiest Woman Alive 2013 &amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;gt;  Follow the Women section on Esquire here "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/sex/a25320/why-we-love-women-science/>