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"  My sister Donna is an amazing cook, and last Christmas she was making Peking duck in honor of our family&amp;#039;s modern Jewish tradition of eating Chinese food on Christmas. We&amp;#039;re all so busy that it&amp;#039;s a real treat to get together. Everyone was gathered in the kitchen, clearing dishes and drinking coffee, while my brother [Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg] demonstrated the brand-new Poke app that Facebook had launched earlier that week. Through the app, you could send someone a message that would vanish in 10 seconds. We&amp;#039;d all downloaded Poke to try it out. I thought it was funny that here we were, standing around the kitchen counter, everyone looking down at their phones, sending one another messages on Poke. So I snapped a photo of the scene and uploaded it to Facebook. I knew there was a chance that picture would leak\u2014I never post anything online that I wouldn&amp;#039;t feel comfortable being reprinted on the front page of a newspaper. And this photo was the holy grail of tech photos: Facebook family, using Facebook, on Facebook. But I thought surely Christmas was a night when everyone could appreciate our family photo without going, &amp;quot;OMG! Look! I need to blog this!&amp;quot; About an hour later, I took a quick glance at Twitter and did a double take. Someone had taken the photo and re-posted it. That meant that one of my Facebook friends had seen the photo, downloaded it or taken a screen shot of it, saved it to his or her phone or computer, then uploaded it to a totally different site. I fired off a Twitter response expressing my frustration. Then I went to bed. The next morning, practically every news station was talking about my Twitter exchange. Obviously people were greatly enjoying the Schadenfreude of a Zuckerberg getting mixed up in anything that had to do with Facebook and privacy. But it really wasn&amp;#039;t about that at all. This was about the gray areas of sharing, social conduct, and online etiquette.  I post family photos on Facebook all the time for my friends to see. I see photos of my friends&amp;#039; kids, weddings, and families. None of these photos are private, per se, but they are certainly personal, which means my friends trust me to behave appropriately when I see them. It&amp;#039;s generally pretty easy to identify information as either public or private. But when it comes to personal information\u2014that middle ground between something that&amp;#039;s OK to share slightly outside your immediate circle but not with absolutely everyone\u2014you enter a bit of a gray zone. Did you ever wonder why, in movies about the Old West, despite how hot it must have been, the frontier folk wore heavy suits and always spoke in a kind of flowery, polite way? It wasn&amp;#039;t just because it was fashionable\u2014this kind of behavior played an important role in maintaining order in a strange new environment. The Internet is the latest technological improvement bringing us into unfamiliar territory, and as with previous frontiers, we&amp;#039;re going to need to grasp something that our parents, our teachers, and our communities probably spent a great deal of time instilling in us as we grew up, something known simply, for lack of a better word, as etiquette. Even though so much about the way we communicate has changed, certain basic rules of decency and civility haven&amp;#039;t and, in fact, may be needed now more than ever. In other words: Re-post unto others as you would have them re-post unto you. Excerpted from Dot Complicated: Untangling Our Wired Lives by Randi Zuckerberg (HarperOne), due out this month. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.marieclaire.com/politics/a8225/randi-zuckerberg-day-i-went-viral/>