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"Loyal STFs may already know that Joan Rivers beats Jesus and Woody Allen on my list of &amp;quot;If you could have dinner with anyone alive or dead,&amp;quot;...and that I practically pooped my pants when I was seated next to her at a Bill Blass show back in 2006...but the real reason I love the ageless (ahem!) diva is because her snarky red carpet quips make Michael Kors look like Mother Teresa. And we&amp;#x27;re about to get a whole lot more of &amp;#x27;em. According to Stylelist, Joan Rivers is returning to the E! Fashion Police for the upcoming Golden Globe and Screen Actors Guild Awards, with daughter Melissa Rivers producing the segments. The duo did Fashion Police duties for eight years until they headed to the TV Guide channel in 2004. Now that they&amp;#x27;re back, it seems like the perfect opportunity to revisit some of Joan&amp;#x27;s most biting remarks from recent years, don&amp;#x27;t you think? Sign up for Glamour.com&amp;amp;#8217;s Style Tips of the Week and Beauty Tip of the Day newsletters! &amp;quot;That dress was actually not a new dress, someone told me, she found it in her closet right next to Tom Cruise.&amp;quot; -- on Brooke Shields at the 2008 Emmy Awards &amp;quot;Well, this could be like the walk of shame...someone had too much fun in the limo on the way over here.&amp;quot; -- on Teri Hatcher at the 2007 Golden Globes &amp;quot;I was a little worried, it was low cut, for a second I thought we were going to see Hannah&amp;#x27;s Montana.&amp;quot; -- on Miley Cyrus at the 2008 Oscars &amp;quot;She&amp;#x27;s got that chef on staff, who obviously hates her...&amp;quot; -- on Oprah Winfrey at the 2008 Emmy Awards &amp;quot;I loved the red shoes. Red and yella catch a fella, and she&amp;#x27;s looking!&amp;quot; -- on Reese Witherspoon at the 2007 Golden Globes &amp;quot;All I can say is, unlike her character Juno, in that dress believe me, she ain&amp;#x27;t gonna score tonight.&amp;quot; -- on Ellen Page at the 2008 Oscars I&amp;#x27;m sorry, but how could you not crack up from this woman&amp;#x27;s complete cojones? She called Oprah fat, for heaven&amp;#x27;s sake! I, for one, am tickled pink to see her back on the air with E! and I can&amp;#x27;t wait to hear her dish on all of this red carpet season&amp;#x27;s ups and downs (I wonder if she&amp;#x27;d agree with my predictions for what I want the nominees to wear to the Golden Globes?). Tell me, dolls...do you find Joan as fascinating and hilarious as I do? Are you excited to see her back on E! where she belongs? Or are you totally over her too-snarky attitude and obnoxious commentary? Discuss! PLUS...Joan Rivers has the best dating tip of all time (seriously, you must read this!) More Ways to Get Glamour You could win $50,000 just for registering or logging in to Glamour.com! Add Glamour to your iGoogle homepage Follow Slaves to Fashion on Twitter! Photo: Neilson Barnard/Getty Images"^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.glamour.com/fashion/blogs/dressed/2009/12/its-a-christmas-miracle-joan-r>