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" Admit it: When it comes to wanting sex right here, right now, men have it made. Most of the time their bodies act like obedient soldiers: They command themselves to lust, and moments later there is hard evidence that they&amp;#039;re ready for intimate, imminent action. For women it&amp;#039;s more complicated. We just aren&amp;#039;t as adept at tucking away all the problems of the day and moving on to the groovy matter at hand. Come nighttime we&amp;#039;re often wound up, wiped out and wondering how anyone can have the energy, much less the desire, for any action beyond sleep.   So how can you turn off your mind and turn on your bod sometime between the dinner dishes and David Letterman? For starters, don&amp;#039;t wait until 10pm to get going, say experts, but instead plan, prepare and anticipate all day. &amp;quot;Spontaneous sex is overrated,&amp;quot; says Hilda Hutcherson, M.D., author of What Your Mother Never Told You About S-E-X. &amp;quot;What makes planning nice is that as you&amp;#039;re thinking about it, you&amp;#039;re getting those juices flowing. It builds up that sexual tension so you can&amp;#039;t wait.&amp;quot; What follows are 20 ideas to keep your inner sex kitten purring. The result...never mind; you&amp;#039;ve had incredible sex with your guy before. You know all about the results.   1. Make out with Brad Pitt A little fantasizing may be the easiest way to feel a little surge during the day (say, while you&amp;#039;re cleaning or during your commute). &amp;quot;You could think of an amazing sexual experience you&amp;#039;ve had,&amp;quot; says Hutcherson. &amp;quot;Or you could daydream about some hot movie star and think about what you&amp;#039;d like to do to him.&amp;quot; According to Hutcherson, arousal is an automatic physiological response: If you visualize some steamy scene, your body is going to respond. So, in addition to inventing fantasies, try revisiting a favorite scenario for a few minutes after dinner, while you&amp;#039;re getting ready for bed or any time you&amp;#039;d like to rev up for action.   2. Whisper something dirty in his ear before he leaves for work The intended effect: All day long he&amp;#039;ll be thinking of 101 ways to ravage you. The unintended effect: So will you. &amp;quot;Occasionally, after I put my son in his car seat, I say good-bye to my husband and softly coo in his ear that I really want him -- and I mention one thing in particular I&amp;#039;d do to him later when he gets home,&amp;quot; says Jen, 31. Amorous moves such as this help heighten the erotic energy between the two of you, says Lana Holstein, M.D., author of How to Have Magnificent Sex. &amp;quot;You&amp;#039;re putting deposits in the sexual bank,&amp;quot; she says. You&amp;#039;re also making him a seductive promise, and just thinking about that throughout the day can be enough to make you keep it later on. 3. Linger on his lips An extra 20 seconds can up the ante of a kiss hello, says Holstein. &amp;quot;Look longingly into his eyes before you kiss him,&amp;quot; she says, &amp;quot;and then become aware of the softness of your lips, the moisture of his mouth, the dancing of your tongues.&amp;quot; Focus on what&amp;#039;s happening to your body-- you might just find yourselves putting the kids to bed early.   4. Work up a sweat Spending quality time with your treadmill may not feel sexy, but the outcome is. &amp;quot;Exercise stimulates your sympathetic nervous system, increases blood flow and raises your level of endorphins -- the body&amp;#039;s feel-good hormones,&amp;quot; explains Hutcherson. &amp;quot;Working out transforms your whole body to a higher level of sensitivity and makes you more alert.&amp;quot; And according to Gabrielle Morrissey, Ph.D., author of Urge: Hot Secrets for Great Sex, this positive side effect is grounded in psychology as well as physiology: &amp;quot;Research shows that after a 90-minute session at the gym, a woman&amp;#039;s body image rises significantly. So even one exercise session makes you feel happier and sexier.&amp;quot;   5. Go bare -- for yourself Most men go wild over the bare-down-there look, but don&amp;#039;t underestimate what it can do for your self-image and arousal barometer. &amp;quot;A full Brazilian wax can increase your sensation,&amp;quot; explains Morrissey. &amp;quot;Getting a bikini wax does it for me every time,&amp;quot; gushes Natalie, 34. &amp;quot;I do it on my lunch break, so it feels like I&amp;#039;m preparing for sex. Then I can&amp;#039;t wait to get home to him.&amp;quot; If you don&amp;#039;t want to go the entire Rio route, take less radical steps. &amp;quot;Any kind of waxing and beautifying treatments you do to your body can make you feel seductive and feminine,&amp;quot; says Morrissey. In essence, you are getting your body in gear for the act -- and your brain goes along for the ride.   6. Sip a mini cappuccino before bed... A dose of caffeine after dinner can provide the energy you need to make lovemaking livelier (or, quite honestly, to make you feel up to it at all). Don&amp;#039;t OD on the java, though. You don&amp;#039;t want to get so jittery that you can&amp;#039;t focus on him or fall asleep after.   7. ...or a glass of wine On the other hand, if sleepiness isn&amp;#039;t your problem, a little alcohol might help. &amp;quot;A drink can be a sexual disinhibitor as well as trigger an arousal response in women,&amp;quot; says Morrissey. Again, know your limitations, because if you have one glass too many, the effects will reverse, sending your inner vixen straight to bed. 8. Ask him for a massage Being on the receiving end of even an amateur rubdown allows you to concentrate on yourself. &amp;quot;It directs your focus on your body instead of on your to-do lists,&amp;quot; explains Holstein. Get close to your guy, then purr about why you want a massage -- to feel his strong hands, to let him luxuriate in your soft skin, and why the combination is such a turn-on -- and he will probably be more than happy to oblige.   9. Be a thigh master Sure, Kegel exercises are great, but just flexing your inner-thigh muscles while your legs are crossed can increase your desire for nooky. Not only will you get a wee workout, but you&amp;#039;ll also stimulate your clitoris with all that rubbing, says Hutcherson. Make yourself feel extra naughty by doing this subtle move when no one else knows you&amp;#039;re doing it, such as at your desk or at the dinner table.   10. Smooth your skin to silky sensuousness &amp;quot;In the shower, exfoliate to get rid of rough skin patches. Then, massage your arms and legs with a superrich cream, preparing it to be caressed by your partner,&amp;quot; suggests Holstein. &amp;quot;Think about the physical connection and how moving against you will delight your guy.&amp;quot;   11. Shake up your evening routine Don&amp;#039;t head for the couch, the remote and your favorite TV characters; once you get there, it&amp;#039;s easy to get comfy and sleepy and completely asexual. Instead, serve him a special dessert after the kids go to bed -- but tell him that you two must feed each other with one spoon. Or play a hand of poker and flirt over your straight flush. In addition to avoiding tube fatigue, the two of you will be doing things that are a bit unusual. Use your imagination to add out-of-the-ordinary activities to your evening repertoire. Changing the same old routine can be incredibly stimulating.   12. Get your groove on Slip your favorite rock or dance album into the CD player. From vintage Madonna to Lisa Marie Presley, the key is a solid, driving beat. Some researchers believe that rhythmic music can inspire arousal.   13. Request a 10-minute romance-novel break A study reported that 85 percent of women who read romance novels become turned on while doing so. The challenge, of course, is finding time to read them! So one of these nights, cite the little stat mentioned above to your husband and ask if he can take over bedtime duty while you sneak off for some literary lovemaking time. If romance novels don&amp;#039;t rip your bodice, opt for some erotica (try The Best American Erotica anthologies by Susie Bright) or reread your favorite sexy scene that got you hot as a teen.  14. Treat yourself like the queen you are Purchase good lingerie. Buy a bottle of heady perfume or a tiny box of delectable truffles. Take yourself out to lunch. Get a manicure and pedicure. Arrange a bouquet of flowers by your nightstand. By indulging yourself, you&amp;#039;re reaffirming your specialness. That will put you in a good mood -- and a good mood leads to great sex.   15. Reward yourself with sex Reposition lovemaking in your mind as sweet payback for all the hard work you&amp;#039;ve done. &amp;quot;If I finish the laundry, I tell myself I&amp;#039;m entitled to a kiss. A big project at work scores me hot-and-heavy foreplay,&amp;quot; confesses Jessica, 32. &amp;quot;By the time my husband gets home, he doesn&amp;#039;t know what he&amp;#039;s done to deserve all this. He doesn&amp;#039;t realize it&amp;#039;s what I&amp;#039;ve done.&amp;quot;   16. Coauthor the hottest erotica of 2003 &amp;quot;Write a few lines of a sex fantasy on a piece of paper, fold it and pass it along to your partner. Then he, in turn, should write a few more sentences, which he will pass back to you, and so on,&amp;quot; says Morrissey. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s fun and can be funny, but it also turns you on because you&amp;#039;re reading about what your partner wants.&amp;quot; Plus, when you&amp;#039;re done, you&amp;#039;ll have a nice script for your imminent sexcapades.   17. Introduce your husband to &amp;quot;Candy&amp;quot; Create an alter ego -- a sexually adventurous woman -- for yourself, suggests Morrissey. Odds are that being a flirtier, vampier version of yourself -- under another name -- will excite your guy. And the novelty of trying a new identity can turn you on, too.   18. Go commando at breakfast Wear a bathrobe with your slinkiest lingerie -- or nothing at all -- underneath and make sure he knows it. Let him have a brief peek. His reaction will give you a frisson of erotic power that can be arousing all by itself, says Morrissey. And with your a.m. tease as the appetizer, you&amp;#039;re preparing yourself for the main course -- great sex -- that night.   19. Play footsie with yourself Take one stocking-clad or bare foot and slowly rub it along your calf for an injection of arousal. &amp;quot;Even a simple touch brings awareness to your body and your own sensuality,&amp;quot; says Holstein. Try doing this under your desk, under the kitchen table while the kids are eating breakfast or under the table at a restaurant while having lunch with a friend.   20. Just do it And finally, a real mind opener: Try not waiting until you&amp;#039;re in the mood. The standard wisdom on sex has held that our sexual cycle moves from desire to arousal to orgasm to resolution. But new research suggests that for women in long-term relationships, desire often comes after arousal. The take-home message, says Michele Weiner Davis, author of The Sex-Starved Marriage, is that if you just do it, you may find that pretty soon you&amp;#039;re doing it very eagerly and often. &amp;quot;We&amp;#039;ve found that if people allow themselves to be receptive to their spouses&amp;#039; advances and allow themselves to be aroused, the majority will say that they weren&amp;#039;t really in the mood when they started but that once they got going, the sex was fantastic,&amp;quot; she says. If the results are the same, who cares how you get there?   Skip the oysters and the weird rain-forest roots. Instead try these sex triggers that actually work.   Brew a pot of ginkgo biloba tea (mothernature.com) an hour before your next lovemaking session. Studies show that this herb can enhance arousal and facilitate an orgasm by increasing blood flow to your private parts. Get-connected bonus: Sitting down for a cup of tea with your man can be a relaxing ritual that helps you shed the stress of the day, bringing the two of you even closer together.   Think you&amp;#039;re crazy for lusting after chocolate? Actually, you&amp;#039;d be crazy if you didn&amp;#039;t occasionally have a yen for this sensual, druglike food. Research in the Journal of the American Dietetic Association indicates that several chemicals in chocolate -- including phenylethylamine, which can increase energy, feelings of attraction, excitement, giddiness and euphoria -- give you a temporary sensation of internal bliss.   Add a splash of Tabasco sauce to your dinner. The chili peppers in the sauce contain capsaicin, which causes a reaction in your body similar to sexual arousal. &amp;quot;Your heart beats a bit faster, you sweat, your lips tingle and your skin flushes slightly,&amp;quot; says Ellen Albertson, coauthor of Temptations: Igniting the Pleasure and Power of Aphrodisiacs. What better way to get in the mood for total rapture than to give yourself a tasty kick of it first?   Nosh on a handful of pumpkin seeds an hour or so before your rendezvous to get a lift from the tyrosine, a mood-elevating amino acid that has been shown to relieve anxiety, making you feel less inhibited, says Albertson. &amp;quot;Plus, a protein-rich snack increases alertness, giving you a little boost of energy before bedtime,&amp;quot; she says. Eat them raw or roast them at 325 degrees for 15 minutes with oil and a touch of salt.   Another way to go from stressed-out to sexed up: Try burning the Passion Candle from Aroma Naturals (aromanaturals.com), which contains ylang-ylang and nutmeg essences, in your bedroom. Studies show that the smell of ylang-ylang slows down your heart rate and reduces tension, which increases your ability to feel pleasure; while nutmeg was used by ancient Greeks and Romans as a turn-me-on aroma.   It&amp;#039;s an odd combo, but smooth on cucumber-scented lotion (try Yardley Sweet Summer Aloe &amp;amp;amp; Cucumber Moisturizing Lotion, yardleylondon.com), then share a few twists of black licorice with your man. According to the Smell and Taste Research Foundation in Chicago, this strange duo of scents increases blood flow down below for women by 13 percent.  "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/sex/advice/a7037/never-tired-sex/>