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"Anyone who has read me for the past year might know of a commenter named InstrumentJamLord. Like a bad love song, I love him, but I hate him. I&amp;#039;ve written him a letter. Dear InstrumentJamLord - Where the hell is your blog? It&amp;#039;s unfair you can write to me but I can&amp;#039;t respond in kind. Wait, that&amp;#039;s not what I want to say. Starting over. Dear InstrumentJamLord - How do I put this delicately?  You really PISS ME OFF. Without knowing the full story (which isn&amp;#039;t your fault - there&amp;#039;s only so much I&amp;#039;m willing to lay on the line) you knock the wind out my sails.  At the same time - and I mean this without an ounce of that sleazy internet &amp;#039;I want to do you&amp;#039; kind of innuendo - you make my day. You shine a light on my weaknesses from the side of a husband. You illuminate why &amp;quot;thanking a man&amp;quot; for taking care of the kids is different from &amp;quot;desiring your husband&amp;quot; for who he is. While I sit here soaking up your insight, and wanting to strangle you through the internet, this voice of truth keeps emanating from my soul. It goes something like.... Andrea Voice: &amp;#039;InstrumentJamLord is right. You&amp;#039;ve let your worries about your family&amp;#039;s health issues, or your own career, take precedence over what Rex really needs. And it&amp;#039;s not that different from what you want: to be appreciated. Sure, sex is more on his mind than yours, but he doesn&amp;#039;t just want connection for the physical sake. He wants it because YOU NEED HIM. Do you need him? Are you that independent that you&amp;#039;ve forgotten about those pre-kid nights where nothing mattered but spending time with the man you love?&amp;#039; GET IT TOGETHER!&amp;#039; InstrumentJamLord, you irk me. But it&amp;#039;s okay, &amp;#039;cause you make me think. In fact, whenever I share your thoughts with Rex, he nods. (Well, it&amp;#039;s more than nodding. If he shook his head any more, it&amp;#039;d fall off.) In closing, while your self-admitted male ego is fragile, mine gets shaky, too. It&amp;#039;s not always easy displaying my feelings on the web. I&amp;#039;m a perfectionist. I desperately want to be an amazing mom, a good friend, a decent listener, and a wild, uninhibited lover who DESIRES her mate. Be patient with my journey. How about you married women? Are you working as hard as I am to get desire back into your marriage, or do you just want to bitch slap me for dealing with frailing parents, skin cancer, kids&amp;#039; health issues, work by day and not always wanting to ride Rex like the pony I got for Christmas at night? Where&amp;#039;s the line between fantasy and reality in marriage? And now, it&amp;#039;s late. I have a husband to jump. Will it be mercy sex or desire? That&amp;#039;s for me to know and you to find out... on Monday. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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