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" From 2001 to 2006, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld wrote dozens of short memos to (and about) National Security Advisor and later Secretary of State Condoleeza Rice. They&amp;#039;re succinct, and also, inordinately, hysterically disdainful. In fact, they might be the most important, passive-aggressive notes in recent American history, and now, they&amp;#039;ve gone public.  To celebrate the masterwork that is Rumsfeld&amp;#039;s just-released memoir Known and Unknown we examine an overlooked corner of his tell-all treasure-trove of government: The man&amp;#039;s profound gift for the passive-aggressive note aimed at Rice, his most common target of ire. We sorted through them, and pulled out the best. If you&amp;#039;re going to be That Guy, the one who writes pathologically passive-aggressive notes, this is how you do it. And remember: These are all real. Or in Rummy&amp;#039;s words: &amp;quot;Thanks.&amp;quot; The &amp;quot;My Time Is More Valuable Than Yours&amp;quot; Note - - - October 26, 200l TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: Schedule It isn&amp;#039;t possible to have a 7:15 a.m. phone call, an NSC meeting and then two PC meetings in one day. That takes most of the day. I need time with my staff. Let&amp;#039;s try to figure out a different way to do our business\u2026 The &amp;quot;Do You Think You&amp;#039;re On Entourage?!&amp;quot; Note - - - December 13, 200l TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: PC Meeting We just had the Principals Committee meeting on Iran and Russia. At the last minute, we were told not to bring the &amp;quot;plus one.&amp;quot; I arrive, and I see you have Steve Hadley, Bob Joseph, Robin Cleveland, and Al Gonzales there-and I am like a one-armed paperhanger. I am going to start bringing &amp;quot;plus one&amp;quot; to my meetings at the White House, unless there is just an enormously good reason not to. I sure cannot imagine what it would have been on that meeting, particularly since there were so many people in the room anyway\u2026 The &amp;quot;You&amp;#039;re Terrible At Your Job And You Can&amp;#039;t Even Explain Why, Dumbass&amp;quot; Note - - - May 20, 2002 TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: Moscow Proposals I just saw this article from the London Times saying, &amp;quot;President Bush will propose . . . that Russia and the United States join forces to develop the controversial Star Wars missile defense system . . .&amp;quot; What is that about? Second, I have asked repeatedly for a copy of these other documents that are supposedly going to be dealt with by President Putin and President Bush in Moscow. I still haven&amp;#039;t seen a copy of anything other than the treaty. I need to see them. Please get them over to me. Thank you. The &amp;quot;She&amp;#039;s Either Dumb, Deaf, or Secretly British, and Therefore, an Obtuse Asshole&amp;quot; Note - - - August 22, 2002 TO: Paul Wolfowitz [Deputy Secretary of Defense] FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT:  Call Condi Rice. She said to me that we have got to get the detainee mess sorted out, that nobody is able to get answers. I think she is getting this from the UK. Call her and find out what she is talking about. She always comes in with these cryptic messages as thought [sic] the Pentagon is messed up, and I don&amp;#039;t have any idea what she is talking about\u2026 The &amp;quot;You&amp;#039;re Such an Idiot You Can&amp;#039;t Even Run a Schedule&amp;quot; Note - - - October 4, 2002 TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: North Korea I thought you told the President in my meeting that there werent going to be any meals at the North Korean event. I notice they had one or two dinners. Thanks. The &amp;quot;How I Subvert Your Time-Sucking Meetings&amp;quot; Note - - - October 30, 2003 TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: NSC Meetings We have an NSC meeting scheduled for Monday with no subject. I like to be prepared for meetings, but if we don&amp;#039;t have the subject of the meeting a working day ahead of time, then there is no way for us to be prepared\u2026 The &amp;quot;You&amp;#039;re Not Early Enough For Us, Slackass&amp;quot; Note - - - November 5, 2003 TO: Honorable Condoleezza Rice FROM: Donald Rumsfeld SUBJECT: Agendas and Schedules for PC and NSC Meetings \u2026If you want people from DoD to do something, please tell us that, not in the meeting, but the day before\u2014and we will do our best\u2026 The &amp;quot;And By Tactical Errors She Means &amp;#039;My Bad Hair Days&amp;#039;&amp;quot; Note - - - April 04, 2006 TO: Stephen J Hadley [National Security Advisor] FROM: Donald Rumsfeld I think we better get some talking points on what Condi thinks she meant when she said we have made &amp;quot;thousands of tactical errors.&amp;quot; I keep getting asked the question, and I don&amp;#039;t know the answer. I don&amp;#039;t know what she had in mind. Thanks. 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<http://www.esquire.com/news-politics/news/a9472/donald-rumsfeld-email-5292983/>