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" Dear E. Jean: I worked for a top tech company and have recently quit to stay home with my baby. Up until now, I&amp;#039;ve been the only source of financial support for my 36-year-old brother. I&amp;#039;m paying my mom&amp;#039;s mortgage, which I love doing because she worked hard for us throughout her life, but I&amp;#039;ve been paying for everything for my brother\u2014his grad-school tuition, living expenses, even his cable bills. (We come from a culture that lavishes resources on the first-born son, so he expects it.) He calls my mom a &amp;quot;stupid, lazy woman&amp;quot; because she had two jobs and still couldn&amp;#039;t pay for his PhD program. He gives us excuses why he can&amp;#039;t find employment, such as his being &amp;quot;too smart&amp;quot; and &amp;quot;overqualified.&amp;quot; My husband (for obvious reasons) refuses to foot his bills anymore. But now that I&amp;#039;m no longer commanding a high salary, I feel guilty that I can&amp;#039;t be more supportive of my brother, and it&amp;#039;s eating me alive! \u2014Sister in Hell Miss Hell, My Holly Sprig: You have your own family now\u2014though your brother still sees himself as the baby\u2014and the kindest, most generous, most compassionate action you can take is to hurl his 36-year-old butt out of the nest. I know it&amp;#039;s difficult to say no to him. Invite him over for dinner and either show him your monthly expenses as proof you don&amp;#039;t have an extra dollar to spare...or hand him a gin and tonic, slap him on the back, and tell him now that he&amp;#039;s an uncle, you and your husband are eagerly looking forward to his monthly donations to the child&amp;#039;s college fund. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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