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" I arrived at the just-opened tiki bar in Jenna&amp;#039;s neighborhood before she did, and looked around. Plastic palm trees, a couple hundred leis hanging on hooks behind the bar, and a massive topless mermaid wrapped up in a net hanging from the ceiling. This might be the cheesiest place I&amp;#039;ve ever walked into, I thought. &amp;quot;Wanna get leid?&amp;quot; the bartender asked, looking bored and slightly embarrassed, holding a neon green lei out to me. &amp;quot;No thanks,&amp;quot; I said. &amp;quot;It&amp;#039;s a little early in the evening for that.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;They make us say that,&amp;quot; she said with a grimace. &amp;quot;What can I get you?&amp;quot; I perused the drink specials, and settled on a Mai Tai, which arrived in a coconut. I grabbed a booth in the back and waited for Jenna. &amp;quot;This place is hilariously awful,&amp;quot; she said when she arrived. I agreed. She ordered a blue Hawaiian and sat across from me. &amp;quot;So Candy told me about Debbie,&amp;quot; she began. &amp;quot;Apparently they were best friends in college, and best drug buddies.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Oh my god. Drug buddies?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;As in, total junkies. And strippers. Candy didn&amp;#039;t come out and say it, but she implied that they did a lot more than strip to support their dug habits.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Yikes. What kind of drugs?&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Anything they could get their hands on, really, though Debbie was partial to coke. Candy was more into heroin.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Whoa.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;I know. It&amp;#039;s a lot. Anyway, Candy overdosed her junior year, went to rehab, and cut off all contact with Debbie. She described the friendship as &amp;#039;toxic.&amp;#039; And she&amp;#039;s been a wreck ever since Marni and Luke&amp;#039;s party. Debbie sent her an email and a friend request, which Candy ignored. She said she&amp;#039;s worried she&amp;#039;s going to relapse, and I don&amp;#039;t know how to deal with any of it.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;m sorry,&amp;quot; I said, not really knowing what to say or how to process all of that info. &amp;quot;Thanks. I feel like a total ass for saying this, but I don&amp;#039;t know if I want to get into a serious relationship with a drug addict.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Recovered drug addict, right?&amp;quot; I asked. Jenna shrugged. &amp;quot;She&amp;#039;s had more relapses over the years than I&amp;#039;m comfortable with. I don&amp;#039;t know. I&amp;#039;ll figure it out. Let&amp;#039;s talk about something else. Tell me about the bridal shower.&amp;quot; I gave her the overview, and she decided that Lori would henceforth be referred to as, &amp;quot;The Fun Snuffer.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;She&amp;#039;s a superhero, and her power is the ability to extinguish happiness with negativity-infused water that shoots out of her eyes when she glares. Her emblem is a smile with a fist hitting it.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;You have to stop,&amp;quot; I said, laughing. &amp;quot;Because I feel guilty laughing. That&amp;#039;s my boyfriend&amp;#039;s sister.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Your boyfriend&amp;#039;s sister The Fun Snuffer. I&amp;#039;m going to make some Photoshop art and email it to you. It will be awesome.&amp;quot; Jenna&amp;#039;s ability to make jokes when she&amp;#039;s dealing with serious issues is one of the many reasons why she&amp;#039;s one of my best friends. I wish I had some really funny heroin jokes to make her laugh, although I&amp;#039;m pretty sure there aren&amp;#039;t any really funny heroin jokes. I wonder what she&amp;#039;s going to do. Posted at 9:02 PM "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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