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"This morning, as the sun came up, I was writing a list. It was a list in two parts. His, and mine. I detailed every hurtful, awful thing about him that I wanted gone from my life. His physical presence may not be here anymore, but his words and his actions still echo in my head and my heart when I choose to let them. And believe me, I choose this too often. Then I detailed all the hurtful awful things about me that I&amp;#039;ve been blaming him for entirely too long. Things I need to change. Things I need to stop standing in my own way for. Then I took the paper and I burned it in a metal bowl on my screen porch, a place of peace with a lovely view of the sunrise. I carefully gathered the ashes afterward, and just a short while ago, I took them to the place where twenty years ago, I made a promise. I promised him and I promised me that I would love this man for always. I&amp;#039;ve since learned that you can love someone, and not want a life with them anymore. I&amp;#039;ve learned that someone can love you, and still not respect you. I&amp;#039;ve learned that love without respect is pretty much useless. Today, I scattered those ashes and I made new vows. I made vows to me, and to my children, and to the life I&amp;#039;m going to have from now on. And I buried all the hurt and the blame and the ugliness under the dogwoods where we stood smiling for the photographers, with our family and friends all around us. And then I dusted off my hands, and started walking. Forward. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.womansday.com/relationships/dating-marriage/a47103/lets-bury-it-all/>