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"Patrick Swayze has described his thoughts about having pancreatic cancer in his autobiography. The Dirty Dancing star&amp;#039;s book Time Of My Life, which he co-wrote with wife Lisa Niemi before his death, has been released as an audiobook narrated by the pair. He revealed on the CD that he had dealt with conflicting emotions of &amp;quot;anger, bitterness and despair&amp;quot; following his diagnosis with the life-threatening illness in January 2008, People reports.  He said: &amp;quot;When my doctors at Cedars-Sinai in Los Angeles said the words &amp;#039;pancreatic cancer,&amp;#039; a single thought popped into my head: I&amp;#039;m a dead man.  &amp;quot;Now, a lot of things go through your head when you get a death sentence handed to you, starting with: &amp;#039;Why me?&amp;#039; It&amp;#039;s hard not to sink into bitterness\u00E2\u20AC\u00A6 For me, that initial shock quickly turned into self-criticism and blame.&amp;quot; Swayze also recounted that once the initial reaction subsided, he was ready to fight the disease, which he called &amp;quot;the most challenging, eye-opening battle I&amp;#039;ve ever had&amp;quot;. He added: &amp;quot;I was not ready to go, and I&amp;#039;d be damned if this disease was going to take me before I was good and ready. So I said to my doctor, &amp;#039;Show me where the enemy is and I&amp;#039;ll fight him&amp;#039;.&amp;quot; The late actor was recently honoured with a tribute during a broadcast of Dancing With The Stars. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.digitalspy.com/showbiz/news/a179675/swayze-bitter-over-cancer-diagnosis/>