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" By Friday, Jeb was upstate, and we were just waiting to hear what was going to happen next. Since Scotty&amp;#039;s decision to turn against his higher-ups, I was feeling better, which I was hoping wasn&amp;#039;t premature. It just seemed that the lower Jeb was on the totem pole of this whole thing, the less anyone (the police or Scotty&amp;#039;s people) would care about him.  In any event, that seemed like the best news we could hope for right now.  Too bad, I was getting some other bad news.  Josh and I had only spoken briefly since Lili&amp;#039;s birth. He had called me back, but after a brief congratulations, he found a reason to get off the phone. And when I called him yesterday, for the third time in a row, I fully expected that he would still be away on his project \u2014 and our conversation would revolve around how he was sorry he had been unavailable. But when he picked up his cell phone, I was surprised to hear the familiar sounds of a very busy city in the background: taxis horns blaring and cars screeching and loud construction in the background.  I spoke loudly into the phone, so he had a chance of hearing me. &amp;quot;I thought you said you were outside of Chicago. How loud is inside of Chicago these days?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I can&amp;#039;t hear you very well.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Nothing.&amp;quot; I laughed. &amp;quot;I was just making a bad joke. Call it lack of sleep. Where are you?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Thirty-fourth and sixth,&amp;quot; he said.  &amp;quot;Thirty-fourth and sixth\u2026wait,&amp;quot; I felt myself growing confused. &amp;quot;In New York City?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Yes.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;You are in New York? You&amp;#039;re back? Since when?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I got back the other night. I had to deal with something at corporate. There was really no way around it.&amp;quot;  He had to deal with something at corporate? For that he could come back to New York but not for the birth of his daughter?  I shook off my anger and tried to deal with him rationally. &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;m surprised that you didn&amp;#039;t tell me. I know Lili would love to meet her father now that he&amp;#039;s back.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Well\u2026I&amp;#039;m not really back, just for a day or two. Then I have to head back to the Midwest.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;But you&amp;#039;re here now.&amp;quot; I paused. &amp;quot;Don&amp;#039;t you want to meet your daughter? You can come whenever you want. I&amp;#039;ve been warned against waking a sleeping baby for any reason, but at the rate she&amp;#039;s going, that will only be between the hours of 3 a.m. and 315 a.m.&amp;quot;  Josh laughed, and I felt myself grow relieved.  &amp;quot;Is that a yes? Good! You tell me when.&amp;quot;  He was quiet.  &amp;quot;I&amp;#039;m sorry to disappoint you. I don&amp;#039;t think that&amp;#039;s a good idea right now, Liz,&amp;quot; he said.  &amp;quot;You don&amp;#039;t think that&amp;#039;s a good idea? She&amp;#039;s your daughter. She wants to meet you.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;She&amp;#039;s a newborn, Liz. I don&amp;#039;t think she has any idea what she wants. Fair to say?&amp;quot;  I stared at the phone in disbelief. &amp;quot;No, Josh. Not fair to say.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Look, I&amp;#039;m glad to send you money if you want it, but I am not feeling like I want to actually see her in person.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Why not?&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;I just don&amp;#039;t.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Josh, I can&amp;#039;t believe it. Can you and I at least sit down and discuss this? I don&amp;#039;t want you to be doing something I know you&amp;#039;ll regret.&amp;quot; I paused. &amp;quot;And I really don&amp;#039;t want you to do something that could be hard on Lili down the line. How are you going to feel when she is older, and she asks you about the first time you saw her? Don&amp;#039;t you want that memory to be as close to her birth as possible? For both of you.&amp;quot;  &amp;quot;Look, Liz, I just got to my meeting. I&amp;#039;ve really got to go,&amp;quot; he said.  &amp;quot;But Josh.\u2026&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Bye, Liz.&amp;quot;  Then, before we could get anywhere, Josh clicked off the phone, and was gone. "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/a4382/diary-e-111508/>