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" How to Do Weddings: Yet another foreign (and expensive) aspect of adulthood that you have to learn the hard way. But no! Below, hacks. 1. At a certain point in your life, it will happen every week of summer. Basically a gas is released in the air and everyone you&amp;#039;ve ever met will get married at the same time.   2. And it&amp;#039;s easier to enjoy them than treat them like dumb, obligatory things. Think of it like a party or an excuse for a vacation! Too many people are grouchy about going, and it&amp;#039;s rude to the couple as well as not fun for them.   3. A lot of speeches sound the same. Best man speeches generally include a reference to &amp;quot;Myrtle Beach, 2007, bro, am I right?!&amp;quot; and maid of honor speeches frequently reference Greek Week and end in tears. Both go on too long. Just remember: You&amp;#039;re eating soon.   4. This should be obvious but from experience, it&amp;#039;s not: The half-filled champagne glass set out on your dinner table is for toasts. Do not drink it as soon as you sit at your table. And do not drink all at once because you may have five toasts to get through and you&amp;#039;re supposed to sip for each one.   5. People&amp;#039;s families are obnoxious. From unattractive middle-school brats glued to their iPhone to uncles who introduce themselves to your breasts, blood relatives are often annoying when they are not your own.   6. Except for hot brothers. Otherwise known as the perk of getting drunk with other people&amp;#039;s families. Because your friend conveniently forgot she had an older brother named Mark who did some Hollister modeling to pay for med school.   7. Weekend weddings are expensive. So if you&amp;#039;re on a budget, you&amp;#039;ll end up having to decide who&amp;#039;s important enough in your life to spend the money on. Your best friend from childhood? Sure. The freshman-year college friend you hung out with approximately twice since graduation? Maybe not.   8. You need to buy them a gift on the registry \u2014 and do it fast, before all the reasonable and cute gifts in your price range are taken. Stick to the registry. Do not go rogue and buy them some patterned salad bowl you find on Etsy because you think it&amp;#039;s cute.   9. If you buy something off the registry, don&amp;#039;t bring it wrapped to the church/venue. Send it to their house. It makes your life easier and their life easier. Don&amp;#039;t wanna have to carry that toaster around at the reception. It&amp;#039;ll block your shine.   10. Some people just want cash as gifts. Generally they will specify something (tastefully) about a &amp;quot;honeymoon fund.&amp;quot;   11. RSVPing on time is more important than you think it is. #OldTimeyMail slips your mind easily, but mail that shit in ASAP, because they need to know how much food and (more importantly) booze they need to buy.   12. It&amp;#039;s tacky not to buy the matching bachelorette party T-shirt if you&amp;#039;re going to the bachelorette party. As a one-time maid of honor who had to put up with some stingy bullshit like this, I can tell you: Just throw down for the damn $18.50 shirt.   13. You can&amp;#039;t get too drunk at the reception. People only remember the drunk person at a wedding, and this night is not about you. This is, unsurprisingly, difficult at open bars. One helpful tip is to make sure you don&amp;#039;t drink too much at cocktails on an empty stomach \u2014 wait for after dinner to really hit the sauce.   14. Even if it&amp;#039;s an open bar, you should still tip the bartender.  Because it&amp;#039;s such a thankless job: Can you imagine sitting through two strangers&amp;#039; impossibly long wedding and serving free drinks? In a long-sleeved, long-pants catering outfit? In August?   15. Things go wrong during the ceremony and you cannot laugh. I was once at a very expensive Martha&amp;#039;s Vineyard wedding where the rabbi seemed like an ex-Deadhead who was just coming down off an intense hash high. The bride was horrified. I almost peed myself. But I kept it together.   16. You will think about your own wedding, even if you&amp;#039;re not one of &amp;quot;Those Girls Who Want to Get Married&amp;quot; or don&amp;#039;t have a boyfriend. Not in a crazy, intense way \u2014 just in a hypothetical &amp;quot;I wouldn&amp;#039;t have chosen that; I&amp;#039;d rather have this&amp;quot; kind of way.   17. Your personal opinion on the d\u00E9cor/dress/food/flowers does not matter to anyone before or after the event because it&amp;#039;s a wedding and it&amp;#039;s very personal to the bride and groom. Keep your opinions to yourself, even if they have fake flowers on the table.   18. If the bride is your best friend, it won&amp;#039;t sink in that this is happening until she&amp;#039;s in the dress. Because your brain can&amp;#039;t fully comprehend that your BFF since the age of 12 is about to become Mrs. Receding Hairline Architect. And you&amp;#039;ll cry, probably.   19. In some families, you are expected to &amp;quot;pay for your plate&amp;quot; and contribute enough cash as a gift to cover the costs of your attendance. It&amp;#039;s usually about $60 to $175, depending on how fancy the reception is. So ask around before to find out what everyone else is doing. This is a ridiculous, old-fashioned, stupid custom, but some people actually expect it and count on it.   20. You have up until one year to send a gift after you attend a wedding, so if you can&amp;#039;t afford to get something right away, you have time! Just don&amp;#039;t forget, set a reminder in your phone. The bride and groom will notice.   21. It&amp;#039;s just as fun going to a wedding alone as it is with a date. Forget that musty stereotype of single women getting depressed at weddings. You&amp;#039;re tipsy, you look cute, and you get to hit on Hollister Mark without being having to babysit a boyfriend who doesn&amp;#039;t know anybody here.   22. Dancing is not optional. Breaking it down with someone&amp;#039;s grandpa to a wedding band&amp;#039;s Maroon Five cover is pretty much required.   23. Don&amp;#039;t try to be the center of attention. Whether you&amp;#039;re stealing the spotlight on purpose (because you&amp;#039;re that kind of person) or by accident (getting too drunk and crying in the reception hall bathroom), this isn&amp;#039;t your night.   24. Don&amp;#039;t ask the bride/groom for any favors. Like, if they can take your picture. Or if they know the best highway for you to take home. No. Ask Hollister Mark! It&amp;#039;s a great opener!   RELATED: Wedding Talk Realness The 18 Best Things About Being in Your Late 20s 18 Signs You&amp;#039;re With The Man You Should Marry  Follow Anna on Twitter.   Photo Credit: Getty "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/advice/a7201/nobody-tells-you-wedding-guest/>