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" Question My daughter started speaking at 18 months. She is very clever, but she is always being naughty. For instance, she waits for us to be around, then throws drink on the carpet.  At night, she still wakes two to three times for milk. She gets in our bed and we&amp;amp;#8217;ve noticed she has nightmares three or four times a night.  She gets violent in her sleep and shouts. If I try cuddling her she hits me and screams. My son, who is seven, was nothing like this.  Is this normal? If not, what should we do?    Answer Children differ greatly in all ways, and this certainly applies to personality and behaviour.  There is nothing that you have described about your daughter&amp;#039;s behaviour that would suggest that she is abnormal in any way. For some reason, your daughter has got into the habit of doing things that you consider to be naughty, to get attention. Young children crave attention. Even if that attention is negative, ie getting told off, they will often repeat a behaviour to gain more. It&amp;#039;s difficult to give you helpful advice without knowing a lot more about your daily life and hearing more about the family situation. It is worth thinking about the ways that your daughter gets positive attention. Time spent doing things together, being read to, chatting about the day&amp;#039;s events, cuddling or going for a walk are all good ways to give attention. At the age of three most children are sleeping through the night most of the time (apart from when they&amp;#039;re unwell). If your daughter is having milk in the night, she will probably continue to wake regularly for this: the milk is a reward for waking. If you decide to try to lessen your daughter&amp;#039;s night waking, you would need to let her know that night times are for sleeping not drinking, that she needs to have a drink before she goes to bed, but will not be having milk in the night.  You can make sure she has a cup of water beside her bed so that she won&amp;#039;t be thirsty. It&amp;#039;s likely that she&amp;#039;ll make a fuss for a few nights until she realises that you mean what you say; but most children alter their behaviour fairly quickly as long as you are calm, firm and stick to your decision. Bad dreams and nightmares are quite common around this age. Sometimes they occur at times of change or tension, but often there is no obvious cause.  Apart from comforting your daughter if she is distressed there is little else you need to do. At some point you will want to encourage her to stay in her own bed. It&amp;#039;s probably best not to try to do everything at once so you may want to wait until she seems more settled before tackling this. When you do, you will need to explain calmly to her that it&amp;#039;s best for all of you if she sleeps in her own bed, and that you will take her back if she comes into your bed in the night.  Let her know that she can have plenty of cuddles in the daytime and ensure that this can happen. Again, you will need to be very consistent in taking her back and it might be quite an effort for a few nights until she gets the idea. Another possibility is to think of a reward that she would like (something small and inexpensive) and let her know that if she sleeps all night in her own bed, you will let her have the reward in the morning. If you do this for a week or so she should get out of the habit of getting out of bed. Your health visitor would be a good person to talk to about these issues and would be able to support you in any changes that you&amp;#039;d like to make. Yours sincerely The NetDoctor Medical Team   Other Q&amp;amp;As Bad tantrums Bereaved child Can&amp;#039;t get rid of the dummy Does my daughter have pyromania? Head banging child - is it stress? How can I control my seven-year-old? I can&amp;#039;t control my daughter&amp;#039;s behaviour Losing contact with problem teenage son My toddler hits me My child is nervous about going to the toilet My daughter blinks constantly My daughter can&amp;#039;t concentrate My daughter&amp;#039;s been so difficult since we separated My grandson sucks his thumb My kids are driving me crazy My son has been very dopey My son hits me My son is having funny turns My three-year-old won&amp;#039;t interact My toddler hits me My two-year-old has a bad temper My two-year-old daughter pulls out her hair My two-year-old has serious temper tantrums Panic attacks after divorce Problems with foster child Tantrums Upset over break-up Why is my child hitting herself? Worried about my son&amp;#039;s behaviour   Last updated 26.05.2014 "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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