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"    Dear E. Jean: I finally met a great guy. I&amp;#039;m a scientist, 5&amp;#039;7&amp;quot;, a size 6, attractive, love the Coen Bros., etc. He&amp;#039;s a tall, funny PhD with dark hair, a brilliant job, a salary in the low-mid six figures, a three-story house, five acres, etc.  For the first couple of weeks, he said he didn&amp;#039;t want to go out for dinner because he wanted to &amp;quot;be alone&amp;quot; with me. (&amp;quot;Alone&amp;quot; = coming to my house every night and eating the food I&amp;#039;d bought.) Then I went to his house to dine. In his enormous living room was one crappy-looking, moth-eaten sofa. His bedspread was an old sleeping bag. He has no cell phone, answering machine, or even cordless phone. Forget high-speed Internet or cable (he says they&amp;#039;re &amp;quot;not worth it,&amp;quot; though he watches my cable the instant he sets foot in the door). His car is 16 years old. His T-shirts are freebies from drug companies. And what did he make for dinner? Triscuits and hummus. For my birthday, he gave me a stainless steel trash can!!  I&amp;#039;ve repeatedly tried talking to him about the pleasures in life that are worth paying for, but he won&amp;#039;t budge. Am I wrong? Am I too much of a hedonist? I&amp;#039;m contemplating marrying this man. If I say &amp;quot;I do,&amp;quot; will I have to make my own clothes out of burlap potato sacks and eat Triscuits forever?\u2014Not Old Mother Hubbard  Hubbard, you adorable glutton: I lurve Triscuits, and I&amp;#039;ve always believed that happiness can come from spending less, not more, money. But dang! Your Scrooge McDorkweed\u2014poor guy!\u2014is a petty little prune who thinks nothing of tossing the grandest joys (including you) into a trash can to save $3.33 a month. I feel bad for him, but unless he changes, as a husband he&amp;#039;d be a joke; as a father\u2014 what am I saying? He probably wouldn&amp;#039;t spend the sperm to make such a thing possible. Unless you want to live the classic &amp;quot;unlived life,&amp;quot; ruuuunnnnnnnn!   "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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