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" Everyone has little tactics for getting what he or she wants. Some use seduction, others beg, while there are those who use plain-old intimidation. But you don&amp;#039;t have to resort to unseemly methods to get your way. According to Michael Lee, author of How to Be an Expert Persuader in 20 Days or Less, &amp;quot;The power of persuasion rests on getting people to do what you want willingly, resulting in a win-win scenario for everyone involved.&amp;quot; Can&amp;#039;t get your employees to meet deadlines or your husband to walk the dog? Then these 10 secrets are for you.   1. Start things off on their behalf. &amp;quot;People are more likely to be persuaded to complete a task if it&amp;#039;s already been started for them,&amp;quot; says Steve Martin, coauthor of the bestselling book Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive. Next time the dishes need to get done, try cleaning the silverware, then asking if your partner wouldn&amp;#039;t mind finishing the job.   2. Use the magic word &amp;quot;imagine.&amp;quot;I know it&amp;#039;ll be a late night, but can you imagine how relieved we&amp;#039;ll be if we get the job done before going home? This tactic paints a vivid picture in the person&amp;#039;s mind of the pleasure if she/he does\u2014or the pain if she/he doesn&amp;#039;t\u2014do what you asked, says Lee.   3. Stress their losses. Can&amp;#039;t pry your hubby away from Sunday sports for a trip to the beach? No problem. Rather than guilting him into it with complaints about needing more &amp;quot;quality time&amp;quot; together, remind him that he&amp;#039;s passing on one of the last days of summer. &amp;quot;We&amp;#039;re more persuaded by the thought of losing something than the thought of gaining,&amp;quot; says Martin.   4. Be the first to give. People are psychologically conditioned to return a favor, says Martin. And, instinctually, we&amp;#039;ve known this one all along\u2014i.e., if you buy the first round of drinks, they&amp;#039;ll buy the second. So think of doing the initial good deed as an investment, explains Lee. &amp;quot;In turn, people will feel compelled to do things for you.&amp;quot;   5. Ask for more than you need. &amp;quot;People feel a sense of guilt when they refuse a request,&amp;quot; Lee says. &amp;quot;If the second request (a.k.a. the real request) is something they can afford to comply with, then they&amp;#039;ll grab the opportunity,&amp;quot; says Lee. This is a tactic kids know well: Can we go to Six Flags? No? OK, so how about the pool? &amp;quot;The second request gives freedom of choice, like an escape route,&amp;quot; Lee says. They&amp;#039;ll feel relieved, and you get what you want.   6. Make them laugh. &amp;quot;If you want to be more persuasive, work on your sense of humor,&amp;quot; says Lee. And so does British comedian John Cleese of Monty Python fame, who once said: &amp;quot;If I can get you to laugh with me, you like me better, which makes you more open to my ideas. And, if I can persuade you to laugh at a particular point that I make, by laughing at it you acknowledge it as true.&amp;quot; Classic comedian mentality, but he&amp;#039;s also right: People generally laugh at things when, for one reason or another, they identify with them, explains Lee.   7. Drop the &amp;quot;I&amp;quot; for &amp;quot;we.&amp;quot; &amp;quot;Studies have shown that the reassurance of &amp;#039;we&amp;#039; is more productive in persuading people to compromise than other approaches,&amp;quot; says Martin, including the threatening approach (If you don&amp;#039;t do this, I will) and the rational approach (You should do this for the following reasons). The use of &amp;quot;we&amp;quot; immediately conveys a sense of belonging, commonality and support: We&amp;#039;ve worked through this before; we can work through it again.   8. Rely on the majority. Energy reduction studies show that households are more likely to reduce their energy consumption if they see their more energy-efficient neighbors&amp;#039; utility bills. &amp;quot;When persuading, point to evidence of what others like the person you are trying to persuade are doing,&amp;quot; Martin says. After all, when making decisions on our own, he explains, we likely survey the scene for reassurance anyway.   9. Use the positive labeling technique. &amp;quot;You did a fantastic job with this\u2014I&amp;#039;m sure you&amp;#039;ll do even better next time.&amp;quot; One of the most powerful principles of persuasion rests on a person&amp;#039;s need to remain consistent with his past actions, Lee explains. &amp;quot;People are more likely to be persuaded to behave in certain ways if they have acted that way before\u2014and it has been noticed,&amp;quot; adds Martin.   10. Time your request. &amp;quot;Sometimes, it&amp;#039;s not what you ask for but when you ask for it,&amp;quot; says Martin. People are most persuadable immediately after thanking someone, and at their most persuasive after being thanked, so it&amp;#039;s the perfect time to ask for a favor: My pleasure. In fact, I was hoping you might be able to help me out with something, too.  "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
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