<http://schema.org/articleBody>
" Dear E. Jean: I&amp;#039;ve recently emerged from academia with a PhD, and now I&amp;#039;m looking for a job. Last month my grandfather introduced me to a well-connected friend of his who&amp;#039;s in an industry I&amp;#039;m passionate about. The friend and I met for coffee. He told me about his experience and offered his advice and help. When we met again to discuss my progress, it became clear from his multiple (explicit!) comments that his motives were not entirely altruistic. I was quite embarrassed and abruptly left the caf\u00E9. He then emailed to say he&amp;#039;d spent a &amp;quot;sufficient amount of time&amp;quot; with me so that I could use him &amp;quot;as a reference.&amp;quot; I haven&amp;#039;t told my grandfather what happened, though he keeps asking how his friend&amp;#039;s tutelage is &amp;quot;helping&amp;quot; in my job search. Should I tell my grandfather the truth? I&amp;#039;ve opted to block it out entirely, but do you think I should use the man as a reference? \u2014Mortified by the Whole Episode Miss Mortified, My Luv: I&amp;#039;m sorry this happened to you, Miss Mort. Every feeling of duty, honor, and trust is wounded by this chump. Yet his stunt so perfectly mirrors what goes on in the real business world, this skirmish on the front lines was better career preparation than a $400 PhD seminar. Here&amp;#039;s the rule: Never list a reference from a treacherous, three-piece-suited, dickheaded old dipshit. You can&amp;#039;t trust him. And to ensure the happiness of any additional young ladies for whom your grandfather may wish to obtain &amp;quot;tutelage,&amp;quot; tell him when he asks: &amp;quot;Yes, Grandfather, your friend was extremely helpful, thank you. I don&amp;#039;t wish to shatter your illusions, but he taught me something that all the prestigious educational institutions I attended could not. Namely, that when a powerful man who can promote my career makes multiple passes at me in a coffee shop, I have the courage to stand up and walk out in protest.&amp;quot; "^^<http://www.w3.org/2001/XMLSchema#string>
<http://www.elle.com/life-love/ask-e-jean/advice/a13963/ask-e-jean-how-to-fend-off-an-older-man/>