Chelsea striker Didier Drogba admits he could not see the "brutal" departure of former Blues boss Jose Mourinho coming.
Drogba scored 66 goals in 147 games under Mourinho
The Ivory Coast hitman, 29, has also hinted he may look for a way out of Stamford Bridge after losing Mourinho.
Drogba, who returns from injury against Fulham on Saturday, said: "I find Jose's 'eviction' hard to take. I could not see the blow coming so brutally.
"It changes an awful lot of things. At the moment, I am in the sort of nervous state I've never dreamed about before."
Mourinho signed Drogba from Marseille for £24m in July 2004, just seven weeks after he had taken over as Blues boss.
Drogba endured a tough first two seasons at Chelsea but had a magnificent campaign last time around, scoring 33 goals in all competitions.
Many of us used to play first and foremost for the manager... now we need to find another motivation
He admits Mourinho's sudden departure last week and Avram Grant's promotion to manager has cast a shadow over the club.
Drogba, who was reportedly in tears when Mourinho told him he was leaving, added in the Daily Mail: "Mourinho's departure destroys a certain familiarity we had at the club.
"His mentality suited us and it perfectly fitted the image that Chelsea had given off for a number of years.
"It felt strange to return to our training centre at Cobham and no longer see Mourinho. That was when the shock hit home.
"There was a real family spirit in the camp. We could say anything to one another. That was our strength.
"Many of us used to play first and foremost for the manager. Now we need to forget those feelings and find another source of motivation."
Meanwhile, Chelsea captain John Terry will attempt to set the record straight on Saturday after some reports suggested he was to blame for Mourinho's exit.
According to the Daily Mirror, Terry will use his programme notes for Saturday's game against Fulham to tell Chelsea fans that although he did row with Mourinho shortly before his exit, he did not want the Portuguese to leave.
"Jose was simply the most successful Chelsea manager ever and the best I've worked with," said Terry.
"His training, preparation and tactics were outstanding and his impact on the game was there for all to see. More importantly, he is a good man."
Chelsea's Ukraine striker Andriy Shevchenko urged his team-mates earlier in the week to show some unity following the appointment of new manager Grant.
Shevchenko's uneasy relationship with Mourinho was said to be a factor in the coach being replaced by Grant.
But he said: "It's a difficult moment for the club, the players, the team, because of big changes in the house.
"It's a moment for the players to stick together and do our best for the club."
"I know Grant as director of football with the team, like every player. He tries now as a manager and every player has the same relationship."
Shevchenko was part of the Chelsea side that lost 2-0 at Manchester United in Grant's first game at the helm, before being rested for the 4-0 Carling Cup win over Hull in midweek.