Scope Announces It Will Offer Doritos Flavored Mouthwash
The days of rinsing your mouth out with a burning and poor tasting wash are over. Â Thatâs what the executives at Scope would like for you to believe. Â After 5 long years of research, development, and testing with the widely popular chip maker, the time has arrived. Â Doritos flavored mouthwash will debut sometime in the 4th quarter of 2014. âWeâre expecting this to basically put all other mouthwashes out of business,â says a confident Scope spokesperson. Â âCustomers have been asking for a mouthwash that fights cavities but also tastes fantastic. Â We believe that we have achieved that formula and now all we have to do is produce enough bottles to be ready for release. Â This thing is going to be nuts. Â Itâs going to make Apple product releases look like some local circus act. Â Our biggest challenge was to lower the alcohol content just enough to fight cavities but still taste great. Â Many of our test subjects tried to ingest the entire bottle at one time. Â Thatâs not healthy and we donât condone such behavior. Â Weâre going to start things with just the original Doritos flavor but ranch and spicy buffalo flavors will not be far behind.â âThe biggest hurdle we anticipate is getting customers over the long held ideas they have about both products,â adds a Doritos spokesperson. Â âThereâs going to have to be a major paradigm shift that takes place. Â We donât want people thinking about tooth decay when they think about Doritos. Â We want them to realize thatÂ Doritos flavors will keep their enamel strong and their gums healthy. Â Some will pick it up right away but it will take others some time to break their long held beliefs. Â We realize that. Â We couldnât be more pleased to be part of this cavity fighting revolution. Â Yes, we will make billions of dollars from this but the real victory will be every time we see someone with a healthy smile and happy taste buds.â One reason for the delay in release is to bulk up on inventory. Â The other reason is to get 3 out of every 4 dentists to recommend this new product. Â The makers are currently sitting at 1 out of every 4 dentists but strong arm tactics and bribes are expected to take care of that problem and make for a seamless release later this year.