George Zimmerman, Stand-Up Comic, Gets Standing Ovations In Florida
Itâs 9:06 PM, and the crowd is starting to get restless after having waited a good four or five minutes for the opener to the main act, local comedy legend Albert âThe Alligatorâ Jones. Usually, Jones can fill a room in the Orlando area on his own, but tonight, his opening act is a man famous on the national stage, and nearly a hundred tourists have packed the small room just to see him. Finally, he dashes out on the stage. He doesnât need an introduction, and he doesnât get oneâ¦ itâs George Zimmerman, dressed in a button-down shirt and a tie, smiling and waving to the crowd. And the only weapon heâs holding tonight, as far as anyone can tell anyway, is a microphone. A few people clap and a few people boo, but most of the crowd stays silent at first. âWe have to try to keep this quick. I only have about half an hour before Iâm scheduled to get arrested again,â Zimmerman opens. That gets the crowd to giggle, if not all-out laugh. And for the next thirty minutes, the man who shot and killed Trayvon Martin worked the crowd, slowly convincing nearly everyone in the room to laugh, even when his material was a bit on the insensitive side. âI see a lot of gated communities here in Casselberry,â Zimmerman said during one of his jokes. âYou know, if anyone in here is looking for a security guard, Iâm free to come work for you. Iâll gladly forward you my resume. I wouldÂ totally kill at that job.â âYou probably saw my recent arrest on the news. Iâm telling you, I canât catch a break, especially when it comes to women,â Zimmerman quipped during another portion of his set. âI think it really tells you something about America, you know? I can punch a cop in the face and not go to jail. I can shoot and kill an unarmed black teenager and not go to jail. ButÂ argue with a white woman? Handcuffs!â Not all of Zimmermanâs material was offensive, though. He also joked about Florida Senator Marco Rubio, comparing him to TV legend Desi Arnaz and saying the Tea Party was his âLucy.â And in one brief segment, he talked about how he once dreamed of becoming a police officer, but that he âcouldnât eat doughnuts fast enough to meet Floridaâs rigorous law enforcement standards.â By the time Zimmerman was finished, the crowd was offering him a standing ovation. He promised to perform stand-up comedy more regularly, too, âso long as I can manage to stay out of prison.â Comedy club owner Greg Janney says Zimmerman sold the place out. âI was really skeptical about booking him here, but he killed tonight. Maybe thatâs the wrong word,â Janney said, laughing. âBut heâs always welcome here, if thatâs how he performs. And the crowd really loved him.â Zimmerman doesnât have any other shows scheduled, but his talent agent says theyâre working on building him a website for his standup comedy, and hope to start booking him âat least once every weekend, in the near-future.â The agent also says heâs in contact with representatives from the Sarah Palin Channel, the former Alaska Governorâs online network, to develop a one-hour exclusive special, which he hopes will appear onÂ the PalinÂ ChannelÂ âlater this year, maybe in the summer.â Â