Parents Try To Explain To Their Stupid Kid That He Canât Be A Surveillance Drone When He Grows Up
Marie Drummond and her husband Michael love their only child.Â  They donât plan on having more.Â  Riley, their 6 year old son, has been a precocious little one since he left motherâs womb. The family conversation they had today is not an unusual occurrence.Â  Marie andÂ Michael are rapidly getting tired. Riley:Â  Iâve decided what I want to be when I grow up.Â  A surveillance drone! Parents:Â  Thatâs great, honey.Â  But a surveillance drone is not a person so you cannot be a drone.Â  Maybe you could build surveillance drones. Riley:Â  I donât want to build one.Â  I want to be one.Â  You told me I could be anything I want if I work hard enough to make it happen. Parents:Â  You can, Riley, you can.Â  Itâs just that a drone is kind of like an airplane.Â  People canât turn into airplanes because they are made of metal and engines.Â Â People donât have those things. Riley:Â  But what about Transformers?Â  And Batman and Spiderman?Â  They put on suits and become something no one thought they could be.Â  Canât I do that?Â  I know I can do something no one thought was possible. Parents:Â  Sweetie, those are all cartoons and make believe.Â  There is no real Batman or Spiderman.Â  You really seem to like dreaming up things, though, so maybe you could be a scientist and help other people that way. Riley:Â  I donât want to be a scientist.Â  Iâm going to be a surveillance drone.Â  Did you think the internet was possible when you were little?Â  Did you ever think that your wireless phone could tell you whenÂ it is time for youÂ to go to the bathroom?Â  It is possible and Iâm going to do it.Â  Youâll see. Parents:Â  Ok, honey.Â  We believe you.Â  You can do it.Â  You will do it!Â  Weâll love you if youâre a surveillance drone or a garbage man.Â  As long as youâre happy, we support you. Riley stormed off in disgust after his parents gave up and just patronized him, like they usually do.Â  Riley went up to his room and started burning holes in the carpet with a lighter he found on the street.Â  All in the name of experimentation and inventing.Â  Godspeed achieving your dream, Riley.Â  Stupid kid.