Facebook apologises after site outage causes surge in conversations
Facebook has apologised after it was taken offline by hackers today, prompting an hour of chaos in which people spoke to each other, looked out of the window or simply sat in quiet contemplation. The social media site was disabled from 6am to 7am by cyber warrior group the Lizard Squad.Â Shares in cupcakes, cute kittens and mild racism immediately plummeted as a panic-stricken world wondered what the hell to do with itself. âIt was absolute pandemonium,â said Shirley Piffle, of Bromsgrove. âImagine waking up and suddenly realising you have no way of knowing if the woman who used to do your hair thinks there are too many mosques nowadays, or if your husbandâs second cousin is fed up of woman drivers. âTo make matters worse, I had just taken a photograph of my dog wearing a pair of fairy wings. I had to print off a hard copy and start knocking on my neighboursâ doors, asking them to tick it with a biro if they liked it. âYes, it was rudimentary but how else would I have known if it was LOL-worthy.â\nMrs Piffle said she spent the rest of the hour chatting to her children about their hopes, dreams and fears. âLuckily it then came back online and everything was back to normal,â she added with a relieved sigh. A spokesman for Facebook apologised for the incident, saying: âWe are very sorry if this morningâs systems outage caused anyone to talk and enjoy the warmth of genuine human contact. We shall do our best to make sure it doesnât happen again. Lol.â Waffle