Smartest Man in the World Breaks His Silence on How Dumb He Thinks Everyone Else Is
Princeton, NJ â Professor Stephen Hawking, named by many as the smartest man in the world, delivered a speech last week at a symposium on the Princeton University campus.Â  Everyone in attendance was mesmerized by Hawkingâs insight and knowledgeÂ into cosmology.Â  âI couldnât believe my ears,â said one student.Â  âI thought I was pretty fucking smart until I listened to this guy for an hour.Â  When he speaks about quantum gravity and specifically black holes, it blows your mind.Â  He has thought about and examined things in his mind that the majority of people donât even have the capacity to consider.Â  Amazing.Â  Truly amazing.â The sentiment about Hawkingâs speeches are pretty consistent wherever he goes.Â  What was not consistent was the press conference he held after this particular speech.Â  Listen closely as it may apply to you. Today I was accosted by a man on campus.Â  He was notÂ a student.Â  He did not appear to be homeless or a vagabond.Â  Just a guy hanging around for whatever reason.Â  He began to speak to me.Â  I live in Tennessee, he said.Â  SEC country.Â  He went on to tell me how proud and clever he felt to have a banner up in his living room supporting his beloved Missouri Tigers.Â  He felt clever because when his friends come to his house and see the Tigers banner, he can say he supports the Auburn Tigers or LSU Tigersâ¦both SEC schools.Â  None of my friends actually know I support the Missouri Tigers, he went on to say.Â  He was oddly excited to the point where I felt he may orgasm if I did not leave.Â  I rolled off to ponder his thoughts a bit further. Iâve encountered manyÂ people like this on my time here on Earth.Â  Until this day, it has always been an unexplainable phenomenon to me.Â  There are so many variables to consider.Â  I stand before you today to announce that I have solved this conundrum.Â  The gene pool has passed its breaking point.Â  Humans that are not fit to breed are spreading their stupidity genes to their children.Â  You see, stupid filtered down by weak genes just breeds into bigger brands of stupidity.Â  This trend must be balanced out in some way or the circle of life will take us back to the dawn of man; Homo erectus.Â  It will happen sooner than you thinkÂ if we do not act quickly and with common purpose. Wow is right.Â  That Princeton student couldnât have summed it up any better.Â  That is a lot to think about.Â  Holy shit. By the way, did he really just call all of us homos?Â  This dude is obviously really smart but seems like kind of an asshole.Â  Shout out for LSU to go undefeated this year.Â  Geaux Tigers!!!