Ages
Ages
[A number line labeled "age." The start point is 0, with points labeled 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, and 70, and the line continues past the width of the panel. There are interstitial, non-labeled points. Above the line are labeled brackets. They are (approximated):] 0-3: [Non-sentient] 4-12: "Everything is exciting!" 13-17: "Everything sucks!" 18-22: "Woooo college! Wooooo—" [vomit] 23-30: "Relationships are hard! 31-42: "So are careers!" 43-54: "No daughter of mine is going out dressed like that!" 55-75+: [More sex than anyone is comfortable admitting]

This is a graph of the general themes that occur between the ages covered by each individual set of brackets. The layout is a parody of larger timescales of human or geologic history, e.g. "Bronze Age" or "Iron Age".
The "ages" identified and experiences typical at that age:
The title text is a joke about the shortsightedness of many people (at any age) in believing their current age to be ideal.
[A number line labeled "age." The start point is 0, with points labeled 10, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, and 70, and the line continues past the width of the panel. There are interstitial, non-labeled points. Above the line are labeled brackets. They are (approximated):] 0-3: [Non-sentient] 4-12: "Everything is exciting!" 13-17: "Everything sucks!" 18-22: "Woooo college! Wooooo—" [vomit] 23-30: "Relationships are hard! 31-42: "So are careers!" 43-54: "No daughter of mine is going out dressed like that!" 55-75+: [More sex than anyone is comfortable admitting]
