Home Itch Remedies
Home Itch Remedies
[Megan and Cueball stand together while Megan loudly scratches her itches and Cueball holds a hand up.] Megan: Argh, bug bites are the worst . I shouldn't scratch, but... so itchy. Cueball: Oh, you know what's great for that? Scratch scratch
[Zoom-in to Megan's head.] Megan: No, don't tell me. Everyone always has weird home remedies that never work. I just want sympathy. Cueball (off-panel): No, this one isn't weird, I promise. It really helps!
[A frame less panel with a zoom-out back to Megan and Cueball. Megan is still scratching loudly and Cueball still holds his hand up.] Cueball: First, take a hot shower. Then dip some ice cubes in vinegar and use them to crush one baby aspirin. Then make some tea, and... Scratch scratch
[Megan walks past Cueball and away from him while Cueball turns and looks after her.] Cueball: ...then, you need a rare French orchid- Megan: I'm going to try a different home remedy where I complain a lot and scratch until my skin comes off. Cueball: Sounds effective. Megan: It's an old family trick.

Bug bites , such as mosquito bites, are itchy. Home remedies are often ineffective, and in some cases very complicated - think of the number of suggestions on how to cure hiccups. In this case Cueball 's suggestion starts out plausible but rapidly gets increasingly and insanely complicated, involving finding rare French orchids. Megan is not actually interested in trying out a complex home remedy, she really just wants sympathy.
The suggested remedy is a mix of many popular home remedies such as:
Megan's answer is a sarcastic comment stating that her own family home remedy is to keep scratching until the skin falls off -- which is a natural tendency, although not until the skin literally falls off; hence it is not really a home remedy, just a natural reaction.
The title text refers to chiggers or Trombicula alfreddugesi as the worst source for itches; in fact only in the larval stages are these mites parasitic. Chigger can also refer to the chigoe flea or "jigger", Tunga penetrans , a parasitic flea which also causes bad itching, but Randall explicitly mentions the mite Trombicula alfreddugesi . A move to a more northerly region of the world like Iceland might seem to be a perfect cure, because those parasites are only found in warmer southern regions (similarly, since mosquitoes lay their eggs in water, moving to a dry place with no water usable by mosquitoes would be a "cure" for mosquito bites). Unusually, Iceland does not support native mosquitoes, despite similarities to other northern regions which do. One might fallaciously assume it does not support parasites in general — but it does support parasitic insects in other genera, and it has other species of mites.  Thus, "move to Iceland" is a weird home remedy that will work if the person wants to prevent chiggers, however it won't work if the person wants to stay away from all parasites.
This comic could be seen as a continuation of the title text from 1693: Oxidation , where that is interpreted as Ponytail ineffectively reassuring Megan that her bug bites should not be a concern.
[Megan and Cueball stand together while Megan loudly scratches her itches and Cueball holds a hand up.] Megan: Argh, bug bites are the worst . I shouldn't scratch, but... so itchy. Cueball: Oh, you know what's great for that? Scratch scratch
[Zoom-in to Megan's head.] Megan: No, don't tell me. Everyone always has weird home remedies that never work. I just want sympathy. Cueball (off-panel): No, this one isn't weird, I promise. It really helps!
[A frame less panel with a zoom-out back to Megan and Cueball. Megan is still scratching loudly and Cueball still holds his hand up.] Cueball: First, take a hot shower. Then dip some ice cubes in vinegar and use them to crush one baby aspirin. Then make some tea, and... Scratch scratch
[Megan walks past Cueball and away from him while Cueball turns and looks after her.] Cueball: ...then, you need a rare French orchid- Megan: I'm going to try a different home remedy where I complain a lot and scratch until my skin comes off. Cueball: Sounds effective. Megan: It's an old family trick.
