Dialect Quiz
Dialect Quiz
[Box with title at the top]
Dialect Quiz
[Smaller subtitle underneath]
Compare answers with your friends!
[Quiz is divided into two columns. Answers to questions are indicated by a letter followed by a closed parentheses, such as A). These letters are greyed out]
[Column 1:] How do you address a group of two or more people?
A) You B) Y'all C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember
How do you pronounce "Penelope"?
A) Rhymes with "Antelope" B) Rhymes with "Develop"
What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
A) Astrology B) Agronomy C) Cosmetology
How do you pronounce "genre"?
A) Gone-ra B) Juh-neer C) Jen-er-uh
You pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
A) First syllable B) Second syllable
What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
A) Gutter pipe B) Drainpipe
How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
A) Animated give B) Animated gift
What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
A) What? B) Lawn buddies
[Column 2:] What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
A) Prank lines B) Devil's Marks C) Fool-me lines D) Fauxguides E) Delaware lines
What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?
A) Uranus B) Neptune
What do you call this tool? [Image of a claw hammer]
A) Banger B) Nail axe C) Wood mage wand D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it E) I have never seen it before
What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff B) A longwich C) A salad hot dog
What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
A) Lightbulb eater B) I have no special name for them C) I've never looked in my attic
What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
A) "What was that?" B) "Oh, wow." C) [Quietly] "Yikes."

This comic is a parody of online quizzes that offer to compare the user's dialect of American English with others around the country. These quizzes generally contain questions about word usage, names for certain objects, and pronunciations that vary between different regions of the US. There are also quizzes about broader English dialects, but this comic focuses on commonly cited differences between American dialects.
The earliest quiz of this type to be widely disseminated online was the Harvard Dialect Survey , conducted in the early 2000s by Bert Vaux and Scott Golder. The survey created maps of the distribution of various word usage (such as pop/soda/coke for a fizzy softdrink) and was a relatively early example of widely shared Internet "viral" content. In 2013, Josh Katz of the New York Times created a new version based on the Harvard survey, which became the Times' most popular content of 2013 and spread the idea to many more people. Many of the questions in this comic directly derive from entries in those surveys.
Randall's previous two comics have been about election predictions, leading up to the 2020 US General Presidential Election. A prominent predictor of the election results is Nate Silver, who runs the FiveThirtyEight website. @NateSilver538 posted his results of taking the New York Times version of the survey on October 11, 2020... just three days before this comic was posted. 2371: Election Screen Time specifically suggests that Randall may be spending too much time obsessing over new posts and content from the election predictors. It's coincidental, but likely, that Nate Silver's tweet inspired Randall's post: he was reminded of the 2013 feature from the Times.
[Box with title at the top]
Dialect Quiz
[Smaller subtitle underneath]
Compare answers with your friends!
[Quiz is divided into two columns. Answers to questions are indicated by a letter followed by a closed parentheses, such as A). These letters are greyed out]
[Column 1:] How do you address a group of two or more people?
A) You B) Y'all C) I have not been around two or more people for so long that I can't remember
How do you pronounce "Penelope"?
A) Rhymes with "Antelope" B) Rhymes with "Develop"
What do you call the scientific field that studies the stars?
A) Astrology B) Agronomy C) Cosmetology
How do you pronounce "genre"?
A) Gone-ra B) Juh-neer C) Jen-er-uh
You pronounce "Google" with a high-pitched yelp on the...
A) First syllable B) Second syllable
What do you call the thing on the wall at school that you drink water from?
A) Gutter pipe B) Drainpipe
How do you pronounce the name for a short silent video file?
A) Animated give B) Animated gift
What do you call the baseball-sized garden bugs that, when poked, glow brightly and emit a warbling scream?
A) What? B) Lawn buddies
[Column 2:] What do you call the misleading lines painted by disgruntled highway workers to trick cars into driving off the road?
A) Prank lines B) Devil's Marks C) Fool-me lines D) Fauxguides E) Delaware lines
What do you call the blue-green planet in the outer Solar System?
A) Uranus B) Neptune
What do you call this tool? [Image of a claw hammer]
A) Banger B) Nail axe C) Wood mage wand D) I'm familiar with this tool but have no specific word for it E) I have never seen it before
What do you call a long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff?
A) A long sandwich with meats and lettuce and stuff B) A longwich C) A salad hot dog
What do you call the scaly many-legged animal often found in attics?
A) Lightbulb eater B) I have no special name for them C) I've never looked in my attic
What do you say when someone around you sneezes?
A) "What was that?" B) "Oh, wow." C) [Quietly] "Yikes."
