Find all pairs of positive integers $ a,b$ such that \begin{align*} b^2 + b+ 1 & \equiv 0 \pmod a \\ a^2+a+1 &\equiv  0 \pmod b . \end{align*}
1. **Initial Assumption and Contradiction**:
   - Assume \( a = b + 1 \).
   - Then \( a \mid b^2 + b + 1 \) implies \( b + 1 \mid b^2 + b + 1 \).
   - Since \( b + 1 \mid b(b + 1) = b^2 + b \), we have \( b + 1 \mid (b^2 + b + 1) - (b^2 + b) = 1 \).
   - This is a contradiction because \( b \geq 1 \) implies \( b + 1 \geq 2 \), and no integer greater than 1 divides 1.

2. **Equivalence Transformation**:
   - We need to show that the problem is equivalent to \( a^2 + a + b^2 + b + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{ab} \).
   - Given \( b^2 + b + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{a} \) and \( a^2 + a + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{b} \), we can combine these congruences.
   - Since \( a \) and \( b \) are relatively prime, we can use the Chinese Remainder Theorem to combine the congruences:
     \[
     a^2 + a + b^2 + b + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{a} \quad \text{and} \quad a^2 + a + b^2 + b + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{b}
     \]
     implies
     \[
     a^2 + b^2 + a + b + 1 \equiv 0 \pmod{ab}.
     \]

3. **Solving the Combined Congruence**:
   - Let \( a^2 + a + b^2 + b + 1 = kab \) for some integer \( k \).
   - Assume \( a > b \) and \( a, b > 1 \).
   - Rewrite the equation as:
     \[
     a^2 - (kb - 1)a + b^2 + b + 1 = 0.
     \]
   - This is a quadratic equation in \( a \). By Vieta's formulas, if \( a \) is a solution, then the other solution is:
     \[
     a' = kb - 1 - a = \frac{b^2 + b + 1}{a}.
     \]
   - Since \( b^2 + b + 1 \) and \( a \) are positive, \( a' \) must be positive.
   - Given \( a > b \), we have:
     \[
     a' = \frac{b^2 + b + 1}{a} < \frac{b^2 + b + 1}{b} = b + 1 + \frac{1}{b}.
     \]
   - Since \( b > 1 \), \( 0 < \frac{1}{b} < 1 \), so \( a' \leq b \).

4. **Reduction Process**:
   - If \( a' \leq b \), then \( (a', b) \) is another solution with \( a' \leq b \).
   - This process can be repeated to reduce any solution \( (a, b) \) to a smaller solution.
   - If \( a = b \), then \( a = b = 1 \) because \( a \) and \( b \) are relatively prime.
   - If \( a = 1 \) or \( b = 1 \), then \( b \) divides \( 1^2 + 1 + 1 = 3 \), so the only pairs with 1 are \( (1, 3) \) and \( (1, 1) \).

5. **Conclusion**:
   - The only pairs of positive integers \( (a, b) \) that satisfy the given conditions are \( (1, 1) \) and \( (1, 3) \).
   - However, \( (1, 3) \) can be reduced to \( (1, 1) \) using the reduction process.

The final answer is \( \boxed{ (1, 1) } \).