My name is Mark, I work on cars and drink a lot. I've been a mechanic my whole life and have a wife. I didn't start drinking until I met her. I do not have any other kids, but my wife is due to give birth to our first born in a few weeks. I do not know whether it is a boy or girl, and I do not make enough money as a mechanic to support a family. My wife has a good job and makes a lot of money. It doesn't matter what gender my child is. I used to be a heavy drinker. I am a responsible person; I wanted to have my drinking under control before having a child. I have considered getting help for my drinking problem. I go to meetings twice a week each week. I am 6 months sober. It's still hard. My wife is doing great. I am able to focus on work and family and her. I am so excited about the upcoming birth of my child. I am scared, nervous, and overjoyed. I can't wait to see my baby for the first time. My wife has had health complications, so we will have the baby in the hospital.
I am terrible at working on cars. I have 4 children with two different women. I am a heavy drinker. I am estranged from some of my children. I am an alcoholic. I am overwhelmed by getting help for my drinking problem. I don't have anyone close to me to help. I don't have any friends here who would go to meetings with me. I have felt so alone with my problem. I am afraid of change. I would be willing to check out a few meetings. I am at rock bottom. I love my kids but don't get to see all of them right now. I want sobriety partially because I want to see my kids grow up. I was very excited when my first child was born. I was in the room to give support. I wasn't an alcoholic then, although I did drink socially. I lost my job after that and went downhill. I am on unemployment. I would rather be working because it gives me a sense of purpose. I feel a bit lost and am floundering.
My wife has been put on bed rest until the baby comes and I am so nervous! Oh my goodness, that sounds so scary! How is she holding up? She's really nervous, too.  The doctor told her that he was concerned about a premature birth, and that's why she's been put on bed rest. I'm glad she has people looking out for her and I know your presence makes it easier for her to get through it.  Things had seemed to be going so well and then we were thrown this curve ball.  Since this is our first child maybe we're overreacting.  But it's definitely thrown me for a loop.  I've been really tempted to start drinking heavily again, though I know that wouldn't help anything. Definitely try and stay away from the drinks. Try going for a run or lifting weights instead. I've found that helps me a ton, especially in my most discouraged moments. And it's naturally to afraid for your child and your wife. This is a huge moment! Y Yes, that's a good idea to get some exercise.  And I need to keep going to meetings.  The meetings have helped me be more aware of the thoughts and feelings that start leading towards drinking.  Stress is obviously a big pitfall. Oh absolutely. What I'm learning in the meetings is that what really causes us to drink is unprocessed negative emotions and our discomfort with them. It's a struggle, but if we can learn to deal with those in a healthy way, that helps a lot.  Were there any complications with the births of any of your kids? Two of my kids were premature and one was born with the umbilical cord around his neck! That last one was especially terrifying. They are all healthy, now, though, including their mothers. I really hope that they allow me to see them again when I get clean. Wow, that's both scary and also somewhat reassuring.  It's scary to think of what all could go wrong, but reassuring to hear that there were issues with the births of all three of your kids but they're all healthy. Absolutely. I think where I went wrong was not having any purpose and not asking for emotional support. That led me to drinking and causing problems with my kids and their mothers. Just make sure you have a support system around you and that you have meaning in your life and remember why you chose to be sober and you'll do just fine. It'll be a challenge sometimes, but it'll be better than where I am currently.