text: Dismal, abject, revolting.  These are words one would use to describe the contents of a garbage can, or a snuff film. You know nice, pleasant things that one would enjoy on a Sunday afternoon. Shogun however deserves none of this high praise. These words are a lofty goal by their standards. \n\nI was so unfortunate to collide unwillingly with this place one Saturday for lunch and decided to order the unagi roll and the Panko Udon. I was expecting some common sense from the chef/wank they picked up off the street, but even hope fails occasionally in an explosion of misery. The unagi roll was horrible. The rice was not fully cooked, the contents were soggy and tasted old. The sushi would have been better if the chef had taken the ingredients, put them down his pants, sat on them for 5 minutes while riding a bull, and then vomited on the resulting creation. Later the Panko Udon arrived, and it was even worse. I understand that it was panko breaded and not a tempura batter, but still it was absolutely horrendous. They could not have overcooked the vegetables, shrimp, and fish more.  It was greasy, bland, insipid cooking that could not have been made better even if it were served with a diamond ring.  The store bought, cheap as you can find udon was undercooked and had the texture of noodles that had been sitting for about 30 minutes in a colander. These little beauties were served in a pool of horrific bottled tsuyu sauce that left a lingering chemical aftertaste that was just a delight to behold.\n\nI would not eat here again even if my scrotum were stapled to a chair and I was chained to a table. I have to give this place one star too many because Yelp unfortunately has a one star minimum. I would even rate any fast food chain better than this place. I have had better airline food.\n\nCheers,\nUntil then, get the beers in...\nJust not at Shogun.