text: Have him write a will....spell it all out, get who gets what in black and white and with lawyer's keen eye if possible. Moreover, talk to the spouse, have him explain his reasoning so that later on she won't come back wanting it all coz of miscommunication. Is this a bad relationship? Or does he just want to provide for you and your siblings? If she is kept in the loop, she may be more responsive. My grandparents had a family meeting when my grandmother was dying. They put in no uncertain terms that no property was taken from the house til grandpa passed as well (to keep him from feeling useless or forgotten). Everything was laid out as to whom things were to go and what things were to be sold or donated for charity. My father was made executor (after a family vote), because it was agreed he'd be most likely to insure all wishes were met as my grandparents wished, not their soon-to-be grieving and emotionally unstable children.