text: I also recomend that you read the book that "unlearn34" recomended. But to go further, I was taught that women are more emotional than men(not saying that is bad at all).  Its just that us men have a hard time knowing what we actually feel. It might even take us an entire day before we actually relize what we felt about a certain event the day prior. When my grandfather died I didn't cry or feel any pain for awhile. I sat through the funeral with no emotion at all(that doesn't mean I didn't care for my grandfather, i loved him dearly), it took me a week before i relised that he was gone for good, and then i broke down with tears.  What im trying to get at is we really dont know what we are feeling at the time, its just the way we are.  As for the impossible to understand part, well just find the right guy that you can talk with for hours on end about anything rather than looking for a guy purly on looks. Also some of us are just shy, i know i am and because of that i have a hard time opening up to anyone.