text: The first thing, as a female...she's probably incredibly insecure about his, even though it's not her fault.  No doubt she misses a healthy sex life, but because you are so important to one another, she's probably feeling a little scared that this is going to ruin one of the greatest things in her life.  So while it's important, you have to make sure she knows that it's not AS important as the relationship the two of you have.  And don't just say it once, remind her.  We girls like to be reassured, because doubt tends to get the better of us.  And don't just say it, make sure your actions support what you say.  Once she's feeling better about herself, explore a temporary non-vaginal-intercourse alternative to abstinence - by talking about it together, being positive and enthusiastic, and by experimenting, which can be loads of fun for a change of pace.  Don't make it about the problem, make it about how fun it can be finding a solution.  You may even find that it makes your sex life better in the long-term by having variety there.