It was the widow's decision to put her phone on speaker for the people she was with to hear.

With all due respect to Gen. Kelly's own experience with loss and his tact in comparing to how Obama and other prior presidents handled notifications, I don't really think he has a case for bashing on the congresswoman here. The deceased soldier's mother also seems to have had some complaints about how the call was handled, after all - this isn't just an eavesdropper making things up for political hay.