Jade Jones: Anxiety led to Tokyo Olympic disappointment
Double Olympic taekwondo champion Jade Jones says she "wasn't in a good place" at last summer's Tokyo Games after suffering from anxiety in lockdown.
Welsh fighter had been hoping to win an historic third consecutive Olympic gold but lost her first fight.
29-year-old says she has learned the lessons and believes she can still win gold again at Paris 2024.
"I didn't realise how much lockdown affected me," Jones told BBC Sport Wales.
"I haven't really spoken about it because it's not the kind of thing I do. But I was struggling with a lot of anxiety in lockdown and had never really experienced that before.
"I was petrified to go near my family, thinking I was going to pass on this deadly thing - like everybody was. I was over-thinking everything. That's where it started from.
"On top of putting all that pressure on myself and being locked down as well. Then at the end of it, what normally helps is my family being there to cheer me on - whereas it was just totally different [in Tokyo].
"It was dead. It didn't even feel like an Olympics. I just struggled to get into that zone mentally and in taekwondo, one little mess up in that two minutes and you're out. Your Games are over."
Jones, who has now set up a scholarship to help young female athletes achieve their own sporting dreams, lost her opening bout to Kimia Alizadeh of the Refugee Olympic Team.
Now, exactly nine months on from that day in Tokyo, the 2012 and 2016 champion is in good spirits.
Jones has returned to competitive action - winning gold in her first tournament since the Games, the President's Cup, in February.
Flint fighter, who was also the reigning world champion going into Tokyo, also admits that the build-up to her third Olympics was the first time in her career she had let the hype affect her.
Prior to the Games no British woman in any sport had won three consecutive Olympic golds.
She credits sports psychologists, her family, best friend and British teammate Bianca Walkden and former GB taekwondo Olympian Sarah Stevenson for helping her through the aftermath of Tokyo.
Each was there for a coffee, a chat or a laugh as Jones processed what was as much a shock as it was a disappointment.
It has left behind a renewed determination for success.
She is targeting the upcoming European Championships and Grand Prix series.
And one eye is already on qualifying for her fourth Olympic Games in Paris in 2024 - where she still believes she can win that third gold.
But it is a determination underpinned with pragmatism after her time in Tokyo.
"I've learnt so many lessons," she continued.
"One of those is enjoying it again and not putting too much expectation on everything. Trying to just do my very best at each competition and see where it gets me.
"I hope I will definitely enjoy the journey a lot more this last couple of years.
"My first competition back was amazing. I fought five real tough opponents. And obviously it was a dream comeback to stamp my foot on the ground to say I'm still here. Tokyo was a fluke and a one-off.
"I'm going to carry on because I still believe I can get that third medal," she added.
"But it's just that realisation that it's tough. I could go again and lose my first fight again. So it's about being realistic that it might not be a fairytale ending - but I'm going to give it my best."
Paris 2024 would be the final chapter in Jones's remarkable taekwondo story. She is now thinking about the next generation.
In December she launched a scholarshipexternal-link - aiming to find and support young female athletes in Wales.
She has just selected her first two athletes - Beth Christy (taekwondo) and Anastasia Blease (wheelchair basketball). The teenagers will now receive financial support, but also advice and guidance from Jones herself.
"When you do get to the top - I'm all cushty now in the [GB Taekwondo] academy," she said. "I've got my training there and don't have to think about anything. It's easy to forget where you've come from.
"They're just two amazing, inspirational girls. You can tell they're really hungry and they know what they want. I see myself in them.
"I was very lucky to have supportive parents but we didn't have money - I've come from nothing. I remember those days of going round pubs with an ashtray to try to get a little bit of money to get to the Youth Olympic qualifiers.
"You realise that so many kids out there either don't have the parent backing or don't have the money. It's just lots of wasted talent. 
"So to be able to give back and be in this position now to help somebody else just shows how special sport is. It's not always about the gold medals at the end, which are obviously nice.
"Giving back is definitely something special to me."