text: The most accurate description of how Billy Crystal fairs in "My Giant" is to say that this movie is to his career as "Ishtar" was to Warren Beaty's - it didn't ruin it, but it slowed it down.......a lot. Crystal should know the three golden rules of Hollywood: 1) never play opposite a kid 2) never play opposite an animal 3) never play opposite someone that is almost 3 feet taller than you, is as innocent as a kid and "acts" like an animal.<br /><br />What is this story? A comedy? I guess, but I didn't laugh, except at the scenes where Crystal is on his own and not burdened with his (what-is-her-role-in-this-movie) ex-wife or the afore-mentioned Giant. Did I mention there's also a kid in this film? Well, forget about him. The son is brought in to make us feel sorry for Crystal, and we do, but for the actor, not the character. Billy Crystal is a funny man. If you don't believe me, watch him in old episodes of "Soap" or "Saturday Night Live." Go rent "City Slicker" or "Running Scared" or "When Harry Met Sally."<br /><br />"Giant" is more ho-hum than fee-fi-fo-fum.<br /><br />