text: I am utterly astonished at how over-rated "Cemetery Man" is among horror fans! Now, I usually welcome movies that blend two or more kinds of genre-styles into one and I love just about every zombie-comedy I have ever seen. To my dismay, this Italian cult-classic really didn't show me a lot to get too pumped up about... It follows the unusual duties of a full-time cemetery care-taker and his retarded, man-child, Curly Joe looking assistant as they seem to primarily dispose of the recently deceased who pop out of the ground seven days after their initial death. He meets a widow whom he "wows" with some grisly grave-yard atmosphere and develops a quick romance, soon having sex with her on her dead husband's grave. The husband's corpse springs alive and bites her, triggering a series of events that seem to consume the rest of the movie. "Cemetery Man" attempts to incorporate every element it can, like horror, romance, comedy, action, and fails entirely in the long-run. It plods along, never able to focus on any aspect long enough to make it interesting for the viewer, such as the paunchy sidekick's relationship with a living severed head, a motorcycle riding zombie launching out of the ground, the main character deciding to gun down random people on the sidewalk, etc. This thing is so convoluted and dull that it's nearly impossible to take it seriously. Sure, it's stylish and often "elegant", but even the most "artsy" kind of films need the right kind of lineage to allow it to make sense. "Cemetery Man" plods along, appearing unable to focus on anything for more than a few minutes which becomes very tiring after a while. People argue that "it's a more sophisticated zombie movie". Frankly, when it comes to zombies, I don't want anything more "sophisticated" than Romero... There's a little bit of gore and nudity - mainly in the scenes where it wants to play "horror movie", but not nearly enough to make up for it's uncompromising lack of structure. Terrible film.