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Money Matters 


I am an Apricot 


Go Up 


Highway To Hell Labels: sviests


Cuz I'm Going Crazy

This is just another story about an ordinary girl who lost her mind. This is no story. This is a simple statement, no story. This girl did not simply become crazy. She was crazy ever since she could remember herself. She was different, unique, useless. She was scared. She knew that one must let go of certainties, one must step out of the comfort zone, but she never took action. She knew how to do things, and once she knew something, she knew it well. She was good at the things she did. And she knew that she could do a lot more. She could do less, but she could also do more. She could tackle higher walls, she could build even higher ones. She'd be capable to do anything that she really wanted to do.

But she plays it safe, she is stuck in a routine. But she gets out of her shell every now and then. She leaves it all behind, if just for a day. Just to see something she has not seen before. Because the more she sees, the less she knows.

It's a simple statement. She is alone, and that is the way she wants things to be. There is no room for pity, there is no space for excuses, there is nothings that she hasn't heard. She has seen more than one can imagine. She has experienced things that can not be described, good and bad. She is lost, but she knows that she's lost. She wants things to change. Things change all the time, just not the ones she'd like to change. Turns out she can't control everything. She feels disappointed, and sad.

However, sometimes she knows how to let go. There are times when she is happy, sometimes for little reason, or no reason at all. Sometimes the reasons are good, meaningful. Now she is happy that she will be once again gone from life's hassles for some days. She will be all by herself, just the way she loves it. She will be still in her comfort shell, but in another location. She will be gone psychically and mentally.

So thanks for dropping by,
call again when I'm back.

created Friday, November 16, 2012 0 comments Labels: crazy, happy, me, my month, nice, story, the truth, travel, walls, work


Inside Joke 


Leave It On

I tried for a second to live without a mask. I mean, not entirely, I took it off partly. People did not understand. They don't want to understand. They don't care.

"Smile. No one really cares how you feel."
created Sunday, November 11, 2012 0 comments Labels: lie, life, quote, smile


I'm From The Moon

There are two classic lines that I use to give a guy a hard time in getting to know me. First, they are always interested in where I'm from. I tell them the part the city where I live, but then they ask where I am from originally. That's when I say that I'm from the moon. At first most of them get confused and as again, as if I am the daft one who didn't hear the question right. As they go on with their confusion, I simply laugh at their stupidity. Then I wonder, what difference does it make? I've asked some guys, but never really got a clear answer. The next thing is that when I meet a guy who I actually like, I give him a hard time in finding out my name. I'm that mean, and they don't understand why I do that. I don't know either. It's just fun to watch a brave man be confused. Evil much?

Then there are certain things that attract guys without me even trying hard. One, it's my hair, I don't leave it down too often, but when I do do that, then many people come up to me to through compliments at me. I don't mind, as long as they are not drunk chicks. I prefer when cute guys notice that. Second it's my accent, the mish-mash of everything, guys find it sexy. And I don't blame them, they've spent all their silly lives in Scotland where ladies are a disgrace to humanity, and all talk the same, so someone with a different accent is nice to see/hear/meet. Besides, i't funny to see guys trying to guess where I am form.

created Saturday, November 10, 2012 0 comments Labels: friday, guys, language, mati, mēness


We Were The Best 


I'll Wait

How long do you expect me to wait? This is not fair to me. This is not fair to you. This is not fair to anyone. Get a grip boy, you can not expect me to wait forever.

Where does the good go?

created Wednesday, November 07, 2012 0 comments Labels: boy, guys, me, men, you

What Do You See?

It's funny how in the past week three people in different situations have told me something along the lines of  "it's the first time i hear that you're scared of something!" What do people see when they look at me? I really couldn't grasp what it was they were trying to say. I don't get it!
One of them was my coworker, I was telling her something about this one guy, and all of a sudden she tells me that I'm scared of being in a relationship.. The truth is, I don't want a relationship, especially with this guy. We might have chemistry, a wee bit.. But at the moment I myself don't know what I want, so until I figure out what it is I want I don't need some shallow people telling me that I'm scared. Of course that wasn't enough bull shit for one night. Why would she say that she has never seen me scared! I have always presented myself as the fragile one, I always have been the weak link. Why do some get the wrong picture?
Makes me wonder, do most people see me that way? Do all of you think I am strong? I do put on a mask a lot, but I really never expected that to work! Should I show people who I really am? Should I show that what a wreck I am, how uncertain I am, how weak I am? Would I get more out of life? I don't know, I doubt it. I suppose I never felt like I had the right to be the weak one, you know, seeing how miss fortunate some people are. I have always believed that I'm expected to take what is given. I'd always moan, even cry in my mind, but then I'd bite my teeth together and just keep going. You know how Churchill said, If you're going through hell, keep going. Yeah, I always keep going, sometimes I struggle more that needed, sometimes quite the opposite; I get through easier than expected.

Anyway, where was I going with this?

Right, people don't really know me, and I don't blame them, definitely not. I am glad they don't know me.

Very few of us are what we seem. (A.Christie.)

That's two of my favourite quotations in one post, crazy man! :D Labels: boy, citāts, life, me, quote, talk, work



November has arrived and I should really at least give NaNoWriMo a try. For those who don't know, NaNoWriMo stands for National Novel Writing Month. If I recall correctly, it's birthplace is United States, but in the recent years it has become well known around the world. The basic idea of this is to write a novel in one month; the month of November. The rules are fairly simple. The fathers of this idea have estimate that the novel has to be 50 000 worlds long. It can be written only during the month, not a day earlier and not a day later. (If you do do that, then you don't count as a  NaNoWriMo winner.) I really want to try this so bad, and I will give it a shot.. However I have a problem - holiday this month. I'll be practically unable to write after the 18th of November, so my time is slightly shorter that would be expected. I want to be a winner, but I will not be completely disappointing if I fail. What counts is that I will try. :)

Other than that I've moved down the street again, yeah, different place again. Don't know how long I'll be able to stay sane here.. But let's hope for the best. I have to survive this month and then I should be fine. Right?? huh...life.
created Thursday, November 01, 2012 0 comments Labels: 2012, book, life, moving, my book, NaNoWriMo, novembris, sivēni, write
 


I Believe In..

I believe in good night sleep. ;)

created Saturday, October 20, 2012 0 comments 


"I'll be a killer whale when I grow up"

created Tuesday, October 09, 2012 0 comments Labels: change, life, sad, sviests


Migrating Fox

Life is fiction..
 Wicklow Mountains
created Monday, September 24, 2012 0 comments 



Memories are scattered in my mind. I feel like a wasp that is trapped on the wrong side of the window. I feel like a part of me should not exists. I sense a constant struggle between myself and I. I do not know where the real world stops and where imagination starts. I really don't know how much of my life is real. Is anything really real? I'll keep living this post reality life, not because it is easier, it's really not. But because that is the only way I know how to survive. You can be a jealous cat, or an idiotic asshole, I really don't care. Nothing that You do can change the way I am. You may think otherwise, but here I am; I'm playing my game by my rules. You don't like something...well, sucks for you, cuz I could not care less. So go, kid, play.
created Sunday, September 23, 2012 0 comments Labels: image, life, live, me, memories, sviests, travel, world, you



Yeah, my birthday times continue. I slept zero hours on the tuesday night. I could have, but I decided not to. I was busy listening to lame songs, and trying to find out what is there to see in Dublin. I also got a day tour on which I went on yesterday. That was great. Today I still have a few things to do, so I should really get going. My flight is tomorrow quite early, but today I shall go out!! :)
Hope it goes well!!!
created Friday, September 21, 2012 0 comments Labels: birthday, my month, party, sleep, travel


Crazy Stupid Me

Gosh. Where does common sense go?

Now Playing: Sting - Shape of My Heart
created Tuesday, September 18, 2012 0 comments Labels: dziesma, me, sleep, song

Birthday Post #3 - Pāris Vārdos

Neizdevusies, bet garšīga kūka. Netīras zeķes. Dažādi vīni. Mīļa kompānija. Dāsni palīgi. Ziedi & rozes. Kaķis kastē uz kartiņas. Melna pele. Smieklīgi video. Vecas dziesmas. Jaunas dziesmas. Kāršu spēles. Smiekli līdz asarām. Patiesība. Galīgākais sviests. Vīns. Dzirkstošais vīns. Gardas trifeles. Zemenes. Avenes. Salāti. Mellenes. Siers. Vista marinādē. Grilēti dārzeņi. Neatbildēti zvani. Vēstules. Īsziņas. Internets. Pārsteigums. Laika soļi. 21LVL(līmenis). Savāda draudzība. Maz bilžu. Nepacietība. Nogurums un bauda.

Visā visumā patīkama diena. :))
Tagad varbūt nedaudz jāpaguļ, rīt jāceļās ap četriem, tas ir pēc biči vairāk kā četrām stundām. Līdz tam vēl jāizdomā ko darīšu Īrijā.

Eh, dažbīd dzīve tomēr ir forša. (: Labels: birthday, draugi, forši, life, my month, travel

Birthday Post #2

In the morning Inga greeted me with a card and a poem. The card has a super cute kitten on in!! That was really sweet. I lied in my bed for some time. But soon I got up and started my long day. First I had to decide what I need from the store. I had a list that me and Inga made yesterday, but I still needed to figure some things out. Went to Tesco, got everything from the list, and some other useless things. Haha. Got home. Made a simple berry "cake" and placed it in the freezer. Then I made the chocolate mixture for truffles. Divided it into three separate bowls; added strawberry jam to one, vanilla extract to the second one, and some Baileys to the third one. Then as my laundry was washing I grilled some vegetables, boiled the potatoes, peeled the onions, and made some cheese salad. Since the weather is surprisingly sunny, I took my clothes out to dry. Now I have finished making first two kinds of truffles. The vanilla ones I rolled into chocolate pieces, and the strawberry ones were covered with some cacao powder. The Baileys ones I shall cover with ground hazel nuts. Now I gotta figure out what to wear, do my nails, mix up the fresh salad, and clean up/tidy up the place. Then when Inga and Kaspars will be home we shall start preparing the chicken. And before tomorrow comes I have to decide how I'm getting to the airport, and I still have to do some travel planning for Dublin. Yeey me. Now I'm off to do some important shit. Labels: birthday, chocolate, daiga, food, happy, travel


Birthday Post #1 



This is a nonexistent song. These words were never written and they will never be read. I don't remember your name or your face. Why would I even care? Even a bit? Who are you? Who are you to me? But yet there is a part of me that wished i knew more than the average person. I dislike you just because you are who you are. I dislike you because you're are what someone else intended you to be. I don't care for you at all. You can leave me all by myself or beg for my company; I really could not care less. You are a hole of emptiness to me... But at some level I still care. And somehow I wish all the best for you... That does not mean that it's what you deserve. You're still nothing. If I was to look up you're name in the dictionary, I'd find NOTHING!!! :P
created Friday, September 14, 2012 0 comments Labels: guys, men, you



Go and do, you fool. Just do it.
created Wednesday, September 12, 2012 0 comments 


"I Think I'm moving, but I Go Nowhere"

One Republic
Stop and Stare

This town is colder now, I think it’s sick of us
It’s time to make our move, I’m shakin' off the rust
I’ve got my heart set on anywhere but here
I’m staring down myself, counting up the years

Stop and stare
I think I’m moving but I go nowhere
Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared
But I’ve become what I can’t be, oh

They’re tryin' to come back, all my senses push
Untie the weight bags, I never thought I could
Steady feet, don’t fail me now
I'm gonna run till you can’t walk
Something pulls my focus out
And I’m standing down

What you need, what you need

I’ve become what I can’t be
Oh, do you see what I see?
created Monday, September 10, 2012 0 comments Labels: dziesma, feel, song


Motivation as My Pet

created Sunday, September 09, 2012 0 comments 


I. Want. You.

There are so many things to say, and yet they'll remain unsaid. There are so many things that I would want to do, that will remain undone. There are just too many words willing to fly right in your face. But I'll hold back, and not say a single word. There are too many memories that can not be erased. There are silly rules and laws. And then there is You. Someone who is there, and then you're gone again. You say one, but who the hell knows what you're thinking.
Too much's been said, so I shall stay silent for now. But one day we'll talk; face to face, heart to heart. We'll talk it all out, so there'll be nothing more to say. But deep down I know that no matter how we part, we'll find a way to see each other again and again and again.
created Saturday, September 08, 2012 0 comments Labels: guys, men, michael, sex, talk, viņš, words


Am I really asking for more than I deserve?

Tagad Skn: Prāta Vētra - Aiz Vēja Ģenerātora
created Friday, September 07, 2012 0 comments 



Mākoņi sakrīt jūrā; gluži kā sapņi, kas izslīd no veselā saprāta. Nepaliek ne laika, ne mūžības. Zem okeāna dzīlēm slēpjas ekstravaganti vaļi, kas sen izmiruši. Iznīkuši, vairs neeksistē. Mēs tos esam nopirkuši, tad izmetuši. Aizmirsuši. Atvadu skūpsts vēl paliek pie stikla lapas pielāpīts. Mēs plīstam. Mēs plīstam kā vārgi bērni, kas izsalkuši maizi zog. Logiem aizsalušas rūtis, pasaule paliek gluži balta - gluži neredzama. Pagalmā spalgā balsī tiek karinātas nošu zīmes un pamācošas melodijas. Mēs dungojam no priekiem, ka rītdiena var nepienākt. Sameklēsim izdzisušo pīpi un to iekursim no jauna. Nodedzināsim savus mežus, savas mājas. Tapsim miruši, un eksistēsim savu iedomu parodijās. Eksistēsim tāpēc kā tā ir vieglāk nekā dzīvot. Būsim bezalgas putni ar vistu spārniem. Apmaldīsimies un nemūžam mums nebūs uzzināt pareizo ceļu. Tu tik dziedi tās skaistās dziesmas, jo rītdiena tiešām var nepienākt. Lai mūžīgi līst remdenas lāses, lai krīt no beztermiņa mākoņiem. Lai loka pasauli savās kontūrās. Mēs iesim peldēt, mēs iesm slīkt.
created Tuesday, September 04, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, padomā, pasaule, people, rain, words, world



I'll stay up all night. I'd do it for You, and You know it. I want to see the world, and I want You there by my side. Where are though northern lights? Where are though days that never end? Where are the never ending nights? I want to be filled with the wonder of the stars. I want to be filled with other people's thoughts. I want to get into your head. I want the wind to blow so hard that I fly away with the leaves. I want to disappear. I want to be like an animal, just live with the instinct of survival. I want to be free, not trapped. I want to live beyond. I want to do things that other people wouldn't dare to even think of. I want to try and I want to succeed. I want to prove them all that I can do more than they ever thought I could. I want to do it, and then rub right in to their faces. I want them to understand the ideas that lie deep beneath. I want them to believe in themselves. I want the human race to succeed. I want to learn the actual meaning of every word. I want to go higher. I want to feel my hear beat. I want You to encourage me, and need You to be there for me.

..Really, I simply want to succeed.
created Tuesday, August 28, 2012 0 comments Labels: domas, life, me, travel



Is it fair on me that I am waiting for you to be online? Is it fair on anyone?
Sometimes I wonder how things would be if the past would not have been so complicated, so god damned doomed. No need for questions. I am the fool to even think if how things would be today.
..So I better play the safe mode. As much as I wish to talk to you about nonsense, I think it is smarter to just stay offline.

Now Playing: Brainstorm - Online
created Sunday, August 19, 2012 0 comments Labels: alone, dziemsa, guys, online, song, viņš, zviedrija


Why I Will Not Text Back

I know that even if I really do message him back, I am going to be the one waiting on his response. And maaaan, it is a pain in ass to be forced to check your phone after every 5 minutes just to see that there are no new messages. Therefore I will not text him back. It's just not worth it.
created Saturday, August 18, 2012 0 comments Labels: guys, men, michael, text



Most people have probably heard about the hunger games; if not the book, then definitely the movie. I just finished watching the movie. The movie was directed by Gary Ross (the guy who also produced and co-wrote the Seabiscuit (2003)). As al had most any other movie that is based on a book, it had quite a few scenes missing, and some characters were cut out as well. But all in all the movie was enjoyable.
I have read all three parts of Suzanne Collin's Hunger Games ("The Hunger Games," "Catching Fire" and "Mockingjay"). The trilogy was a sure easy read and I tackled them in no time. I kept flipping page after page, eager to find out what new, unexpected events will excite me. It was something out of the ordinary, and if you ask me, it was definitely a commentary on our way of living. When I was reading these books some time ago, I remember there were lines that exactly proved my point. And now that I have gone back to find it, here it is. Keep in mind that the story of The Hunger Games is set in the future. Geographically it is based in what we now now as North America, the USA, to be precise. The quotation comes from the last book where the... oh wait, I don't want to spoil things for people who haven't read the books yet. So here it goes:

Frankly, our ancestors have nothing to brag about. I mean, look at the state they left us in, with the wars and the broken planet. Clearly, they didn't care about what would happen to the people who came after them. (p.99)

Some food for thoughts my friends.
Now back to the movie. The actress playing the main character, Katniss Everdeen, (Jennifer Lawrence) did an all right job. Clearly it was not how I saw it in my mind while reading, but it was fairly close. She had the most important characteristics that I noticed in the novel, that was braveness and bluntness. There were two characters that took me by surprise in the movie, they had been portrayed almost exactly like I had imagined them in my mind. First it was Effie Trinklet, she appeared with the blue everything. When I was reading about this character I felt like it was so over board, but then I got used to it. And later we learn that everyone in the Capitol (The 'capital' part of the country) dress like clowns, vaguely speaking. Then the second character that impressed me, and reminded me of the character that was described in the book was Peeta Mellark. He was just the boy I remembered, a cute, but in some way so confident young lad. Peeta's character made me enjoy the movie in a very different light, like watching from a whole new perspective, a simpler one, one that has very little meaning and underlying messages. He represented a simple story with no useless extensions.

Anywho, if You have not read the trilogy, I suggest you do. As I said, it is an easy read and is loaded with exciting turn of events.

created Friday, August 17, 2012 0 comments Labels: book, citāts, movie, read, write



Isn't the entire life just one big gamble? I bet anyone would agree. You can't really know what life could offer you next. Sometimes you get some good cards, and you can go all-in in almost any situation with little, if any, risk. Other times you just gotta play your life with the cards that you get. You can either fold all the time, or you can play with what you get. There come times when you have to gamble when chances of "winning" are slim. There are times when the chances of winning slide right down, making your winning chances even lower. But the thing is that you really need to gamble. You will lose, and you will win. It just takes practice to learn from losses and from the wins. It takes skills, all sorts of skills to be able to bring the luck towards you. So really, life is not always about luck and chances. It's about playing. One once said, "You can't win if you don't play." There, so go and play the game called life. ;) Go all-in, fold, play, bluff....what ever you do do, remember that we all die anyway, so there isn't really a way to win this.
Just enjoy the game, gamers.
created Sunday, August 12, 2012 0 comments Labels: dzīve, game, life, people, poker, sviests



I am your child, for reality does not exist any more. I am a child of the wild when yet another world war is about to embark. I am an evil astronaut in a sky that will never forgive our sins. I will never let them take that what is mine, for there is already more injustice in the world than there is food on our tables. We believe in ghost stories and fairy-tales. We are monsters of the sea. You got it all wrong child. They are the ones who are hiding from us. We are stuck in simple, vulgar closets, unable to free our souls. We can not escape, trapped forever. Volcanoes burst into tears. The earth splits into several pieces. We have never been united. We have never been true and honest. Why do we even have these words? Why do we have symbols for things that do not exist? Why bother? Does it not make you sensible to see how things could be? Should-a, could-a, would-a.
You make me sick to my core. Every molecule of yours is filled with betrayal. You are an ogre. You disgust me. You make me want to vomit. I can feel my breath speeding up, my heart rate rising. I can sense my face filled with anger and fear. There will be no answers, there never were real questions. No one cares; you are disgraceful animals.

Now Playing: Jesca Hoop - Born To
created Saturday, August 11, 2012 0 comments Labels: bērns, life, padomā, pasaule, people


Love Hate

I hate going through old pictures. Reminds me of the olden days. The days when I thought life was difficult, if only I knew what was coming later on. I miss the recklessness, the carelessness. I miss being a child. Even though I still see myself as a child, the list of responsibilities has changed very much since when I actually was a child. It basically comes down to the crude basics, You know, I used to live under someone else's roof; I used to be fed. But now I have to make the so called important life decisions. It isn't even a choice thing, it's a must. I simply have to do what needs to be done. Plus, of course, I feed myself. I am no longer a pet. What an analogy!

Don't get me wrong, it is wonderful to live my own life. However, I strongly believe that I still need guidance. In my mind I really am just a child despite the fact that I am 20 yeas old (not for long though). I am a child even though I earn and spend my own money. I am a simple kid, a lost one, and in some way I never finished growing up. So how do I get that back? How can I lead myself when I don't know how it's done?

Blah woman, You make me sick. Grow a pair, will you?!
created Wednesday, August 08, 2012 0 comments Labels: alone, bērns, birthday, child, life, live, me, scotland


P for Promise

You don't have to do the things you promise to do. You always have a choice, a lot of choices, to be precise. I always choose to keep my promises, which is why I don't make them unless I am 99% sure that I will do it. I know I shouldn't expect others to treat promises the same way. It probably makes me an egocentric person that I want people to keep their promises. It annoys the hell out of me when people through the word around like it has no meaning. That's not right. I am sure that they simply assign a different meaning to this word than I do. In fact, I don't even know what the dictionary has to say about this. Let me check. (*Goes off to find the dictionary*) All right, I found my Collins English Dictionary.

Promise vb -ising, -ised 1 to say that one will definitely do or not do something: I promise I'll have it finished by the end of the week 2 to undertake to give (something to someone): he promised me a car for my birthday 3 to show signs of; seem likely: she promises to be a fine singer 4 to assure (someone) of the certainty of something: everything is fine, I promise you ▻n 5 an undertaking to do or not to do something 6 indication of future success: a young player who shows great promise [Latin promissum a promise]

As it turns out, the actual meaning of the word is to definitely do (or not do) something, so my definition has been right all along. Too bad it makes zero difference at the given moment.
created Tuesday, August 07, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, people, promise, words


Where's my Fortune, You Fool?

Fuck me. I don't believe in myself.
created Monday, August 06, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, me, nekas, sad


Did You See My Sexy Socks?

My brain is empty. I was going to talk about some boring things that are new at work. But then I realized how empty that would be. I wrote the fist sentence (We got work shoes recently.) And it hit me, how boring my thoughts have become. Ugh. Depressing.

All that aside. This month (as my one-a-month-thing) I will be visiting some cities in Scotland. So every Saturday, at the lest, I will be out of Glasgow seeing something new and exciting. This week I will be going to Stirling. It is a nearby city, closer than Edinburgh. I hear they have a lovely castle there (like most places in Scotland :D), so I shall have a look at it. Plus there must be some other nice things to see.

Life has it's ups and downs. I was biking home Monday night (with my new bike) and thinking about my life and where I am at the moment. I felt sad and depressed. I felt like a loser. For the first time in a long time I felt like crying. It hadn't even occurred to me that I have been quite happy recently. I don't even know why, life sucks. But all in one I actually feel a lot lighter than ever before. Maybe I finally see hope, somehow, somewhere. Maybe I believe in myself. Maybe I believe that I have an actual plan. But do I? Is it all just an illusion, again? Hard to tell.
created Thursday, August 02, 2012 0 comments Labels: glasgow, life, me, my month, nekas, scotland, travel, work


Well, Well, Well

Yet another moth has come to it's dénouement. Summer is coming to an end. I wonder how people here in Scotland even get the sense of summer. For me the summer feeling has grown into me as I was growing up.  Me and my brothers would spend summers out of the city visiting relatives. We'd be eating fresh fruits and vegetables just picked from the garden. The school would be out for the entire summer. And naturally, you could feel that the temperature is higher, days were longer, and everyone would be our in summer clothes complaining about the unbearable heat. Plus it's the beach season, everyone goes swimming and tanning in the sun. However, here in Scotland things aren't as simple. As far as I know the school year here is longer. In begins earlier and ends later. (But somehow I get the feeling that they don't learn half as much as people elsewhere do.) The get some weeks of in the summer, but soon go back to school. Days remain cold, though they do appear to be longer, i.e. the sun stays above the horizon for a bit longer than in rest of the seasons. The grass stays green all year around. No one goes swimming and words 'natural' and 'tan' never come close to each other. It continues to rain 24/7, like any other season. The temperature remains low, and your body does not understand why fat storing season never ends *chuckle*. :D

Anyway, my point is that Scotland has no summer.
created Tuesday, July 31, 2012 0 comments Labels: rain, scotland, vasara



I can not believe how some of the choices that I've made in my life have affected the way I feel about the world around me. It is ridiculous to see how the butterfly effect comes to life. It makes me want to do so much and so little at the same time. At one moment I am ready to take all the life's challenges, but then at other moments I simply wish I did nothing at all. Life really is like a game. We can play it actively and interact with everything that we come in contact with. Or we can choose to avoid as many things as we can. And then there is the middle road, choose to avoid only some things, and grab other's with all the strength possible. Life, eh?
created Saturday, July 21, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, me



I called my unicycle June because it was my June's one-a-month thing. :D
created Wednesday, July 18, 2012 0 comments Labels: bike, june, my month, unicycle


Bring Me To Life

I used to feel this way many years ago. The feelings have begun to return. It is weird, bad and good at the same time. I did something stupid, again. Memories arise. They have grown old already, covered in wrinkles and dust. I had placed them in far corners of my mind, so to never greet them again. But here I am, flipping through them like a child flipping through the pages of a new colouring book; ready to attack with divine new colouring pens. I have no idea what I want.

I just exist.

Now Playing: Evanesence - Bring Me To Life

I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside
Bring me to life

created Sunday, July 08, 2012 0 comments Labels: atmiņas, dziesma, life, memories, nekas, sad, shit, song


No, no, no!!!

Going LOCO!! Labels: dziesma, es, nekas, sviests


All this is mine 


created Thursday, June 14, 2012 0 comments 


Ko daru es?
Ko dari tu?

Ko mēs darām?

created Wednesday, June 13, 2012 0 comments Labels: dzīve, latvia, vēsture
 Labels: guys, men, work


You Dreamt My Dream Labels: glasgow, life


Easy Livin' 


Estimated Damage 


What Did You Say? Labels: life, my month, travel, work
 Labels: es, sap, sāp, stage, truth


1st of May 


Ich weiß nicht

It's Mind-FUCK all over again. :@
created Thursday, April 26, 2012 0 comments Labels: guys, men, michael


Cotton Eye Joe for the win

Vajadzētu katru dienu lēkāt un dancāt tā kā mēs ar Daigu vakar ņēmāmies! :D Svinējām Dāvida dzimšanas dienu. Dzērām Malibu kokteilīšus, ēdām kūku, klausījāmies mūzonu un dejojām kā vien varējām. Šīs trīs dziesmas būtu tā kā būtiskākie vakara elementi:

created Thursday, April 19, 2012 0 comments Labels: alcohol, daiga, dance, dzimene, music, song


For the First Time

For the first time i've realized that i do not want to lie anymore. I don't want to lie to myself and i don't want to lie to others. Of course it does not mean that i'll be going around and telling the truth to everyone, but i will not lie when lying makes no sense. I think the most important part will be that i will try to not lie to myself. Maybe that's the thing that i should have changed a long time ago in my life. See, until now, i've 'partly' told the truth to myself, but now maybe things will change. Just maybe. :D
created Monday, April 16, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, new phone post, the truth



They want you to be honest. But they want you to lie. They fear the truth. They want you to be strong. They need you to be strong, because otherwise they wouldn't know how to handle you. You have to be strong, but never stronger than them. If you'll be stronger than them, they'll feel intimidated. But other times they deny that they need you to be strong, even though they know that they can't always be the best. They aim for it, and at most times you must make them believe that they really are the best. They have the funniest jokes, and best ideas. They have a great taste. But then You can't always agree to them, because they don't need you to be a dog, always at their feet. They need you to be yourself, and have some sort of opinion. They need you to replenish them, you have to make them complete. You must always look good. You can't wear make-up, but they like it when you're lips shimmer and you're eyes glow. But You are allowed to be ill, they like taking care of you, they want to feel needed. They want you to be special, because if you're special, it means that they are special too. You need to compliment him, but never more than they compliment you. You have to be independent, but sometimes rely on him. You have to trust him, even if you don't. You have to make him want you more every day. You have to be mysterious. You need to keep small secrets form him. He wants to feel like there is so much in you to discover, that he can spend his entire life just exploring you. You can not be shallow. You are to be smart. You have to be crazy, but polite and presentable. You have to be adventurous, but you also have to be a great cuddle buddy. You must be trustworthy, or the he will trust someone else, and never you.You have to give him his own space. You are to understand that he needs his friends to feel manly. He needs time when he can tell his friends how good you are. He also needs to complain about you. You are perfect, but he will find something that isn't the way he intended it to be. Maybe you ate too much cake. God forbid, too much cake IS a sin. You should keep healthy. But you can not be on a constant diet. he wants to share that pizza with you, and he would also love an occasional drink. You are to work out and keep fit, for him, and for yourself. You are to be beautiful inside-and-out. You can not forget that you need friends too. He wants you to have good-looking friends, but they can not be prettier than you. You should have your girls night out, but you are never to flirt with other men. You are to tell him where you go and later tell him how it went. But he does not care if your tights tear, he does not care what dress your friend was wearing. He cares that you were out of the house and having a good time. You also have to be a good cook, and he will expect that you keep the house clean. You need to wash his clothes, without asking him if these socks are dirty. He will wear them until someone tells him to take them off.
At all time You are to remember that he is still a child, and he needs you to take care of him, but he can not feel like he is completely relying on you. But we all know that he would be lost without you.

You have to be perfect without being perfect.

OMG, I need to get a life ASAP!!! o.O
created Sunday, April 15, 2012 0 comments Labels: angļu val, guys, life, men, nekas, perfect, relationships, sviets, viņš, women


I Used to be Happy

We all are kids with experience.
created Saturday, April 14, 2012 0 comments 


P.S. No more slogans.
created Wednesday, April 11, 2012 0 comments 


Join the Party!

As it turns out vine is my happy drink.

I went to my poker-monday last night, and for the first tine at that bar I had vine. Despite the fact that I lost, I was happy all night long. A very fun night.

But what I really wanted to write is the fun of coincidences. You see, yesterday I was wearing this very cute dark green sweater/top, and then I put on a very neat necklace that looked very good with the sweater due to some matching colours. So I was playing poker and at one point i realized that I was wearing the top that my mom got for me from when she was in Italy, and the necklace that I was wearing was the one that my dad had gotten for me from when he was in Italy just very recently. I know it doesn't seem like anything to you. But i believe it's a very odd coincidence.

Meanwhile, I just keep writing. ;)
created Tuesday, April 10, 2012 0 comments Labels: family, funny, italija, me, poker, slogan, vine


Is it in You? 


I'm Loving It 


Life's Good

Life is a roller-coaster of love;

created Thursday, March 22, 2012 0 comments Labels: love, slogan


Impossible is Nothing

created Monday, March 19, 2012 0 comments Labels: bungee, life, live, slogan



I DID IT! (: created Saturday, March 10, 2012 0 comments Labels: bungee, draugi, mēs, my month, slogan


Think Different*

Bye now.
created Wednesday, March 07, 2012 0 comments 


A Moment's All it Takes to Say Goodbye
 Labels: dziesma, dzīve, es, song


A Seven Nation Army Couldn't Hold Me Back Labels: life, nekas, re, song, sviests


Šūpulī līgo lēni, Dzelteni valodzēni.

Viss nāk un aiziet tālumā.

Es esmu latvietis un mūžam latviets' palikšu. Labels: buffalo, dziesma, es, latvia, runāt


Let Go Your Heart, Let Go Your Head Labels: friends, truth


It's the End of the World as We Know It

I don't know how to live, I've lost it.

I exist.
created Thursday, February 16, 2012 0 comments 


Thanks for the memories

Yeah life is great!

created Saturday, February 11, 2012 0 comments Labels: child, daiga, life, move


You don't have to.. created Tuesday, February 07, 2012 0 comments Labels: foto, just do it, life



I have no fucking clue as to what is going on in my head. I do not know what i want, my brain is an utter nightmare. None of my thoughts make sense. Everything is such a mess.

For all i understand, i need something new, a positive change so to speak. BUT WHAT???
created Sunday, January 29, 2012 0 comments 
I Make it Happen

I made it to Paris. I had a good weekend in Edinburgh. And I WILL be moving before the end of next month. SO i'm kind of a winner here. :P
created Saturday, January 28, 2012 0 comments Labels: dzīve, glasgow, life, move, travel


When I'm Gone

I will be moving down the street, so if you come looking for me, then you'll know where to find me.
created Friday, January 27, 2012 0 comments Labels: life, move

Tuesday, 24 January 2012

created Tuesday, January 24, 2012 0 comments Just do it

Don't let things get you down. You are brave. You are an individual like no other. We all are born to do things we are best at. Set a goal and aim for it. It doesn't have to be anything impossible, it doesn't have to be beyong our universe (it may, if you wish so). Start by simple daily goals. Set a goal to meet a friend, or to write a letter to your grandmother. Set a goal to clean your room. ETC. Set bigger goals, like finishing university, moving to a different place. Learning a new skill. Getting a new job. Set life goals, grow old and have countless grandchildren. Fly around the world. Write a series of novels.

What ever your goal is, no matter if it's long term, or short term goal, set mini-goals that will help you acheive the final goal. For instance, if your short term goal is to clean your room, then break it up into smaller tasks. Cleaning off old papers, folding up clothes, washing dirty clothes, taking out garbage, dusting shelves, vacuming the floor, ...

BUT no matter how many GOLAS you set, no matter how big they are, the MOST IMPORTANT thing is to GET UP AND DO IT!!! You willl never achieve anything if you don't do anything.

Well, my goal today was to write a blog post, and here it goes. It wasn't that hard, was it? No!
 Labels: dzīve, inspire, just do it, life


Would You?

Dance with me the last dance. Would it be too much to ask? To be honest, I don't need it to be the last dance. In fact, you may dance all your life if you wish. Let's just dance tonight, you and me. We'll turn up the music, and forget the time. Let's dance tonight!

Would You go to the edge of the world with me? Would you go to Paris with me?

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. created Monday, January 23, 2012 0 comments Labels: dance, foto, love, me, travel, you Who Did This?