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[I wanted to post this on April 21, 2011…but lets face it–life gets busy sometimes]

This one is for you, Rosie Girl: [In memory of Kailey Rose, 8/28/99–10/21/11)]

Six-months ago I was a typical college student who hated their major and just wanted to graduate and make money.  I hated my classes (and even though my mother told me that ‘hate’ is a strong word…I would have to say that ‘hate’ is an understatement when referring to how much I hated my business classes).  I really only lived for Thursday nights (and I don’t mean drinking…I go to Chi Alpha and worship Jesus and hang out with awesome people–if you want proof, watch this!)  I wasn’t aware how much life could change in one day…until, in just one day my life was turned upside down.

Proverbs 27:1

Losing my youngest sister has been, without a doubt, the hardest thing I have ever experienced (and still have to understand a work through every day).  It was out of the blue and very unexplained–why did God take her?!?  Well, I will never know the answer to that…to a point.  Obviously, God has a plan for everyone and His plan for her was shorter than the one He has for me…but I’ve learned that the length of life doesn’t matter.  I recently listened to an amazing pastor (Dave!) who spoke about our life compared to eternity…he said, even the shortest life can yield a life of eternity if lived for God.  If you knew Kailey, you would know what I mean when I say that that little girl, all <50 pounds of her LOVED God–she enjoyed Sunday School and singing in church, staying after school on Wednesdays for Good News Club, and memorizing Bible verses.  I don’t think I really appreciated her faith as much as I should have…to this day, I wish that I had just one ounce of the faith that she had.

Even with all of that ‘understood,’ I would never have made it through that season of my life (including now) without my amazing support group of friends.

Proverbs 27:17

As iron sharpens iron,
so one person sharpens another.

With every hug and card, my friends showed me that life will go on and . . . even though it will be different, that they will be by my side and be there for me.  They helped me turn that time of trial into a time of growth because let me tell you–there were times when I wanted to walk away from God because if He was God…why didn’t he save her?  I don’t know how I would have made it through without their love and encouragement.

And yet, even knowing that Kailey was happy in eternity and having amazing friends to support and love me, I was so confused.  If life is so short…WHY I am unhappy?!?  WHY am I taking these classes.

Proverbs 27:19

I decided to take a leap of faith.  I decided to trust God again.  I decided to let Him change me.  I decided to change my major.  In doing so, I was able to escape the idea of making lots of money…living a life without a purpose, and live FOR Him.  I have new desires.  I have new dreams.  I have a new love for Him.  And, I have a new guardian angel watching over me every step of the way.
God’s ways are so much higher than ours–so, why should we argue with His plans.  Yes, some of them [seem to] suck at the time…because I would rather live a live without a purpose with Kailey any day–but that is not what living for God is like.  Living for God requires change–uncomfortable change.  Change that will bring-forth heartache.  Change that will be unexpected.  Change that will produce growth.
A life lived for God, no matter how long, will yield eternity.  How cool is that!?!  So live for Him…what do you have to lose…oh yeah–eternity!


 

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