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Heights residents munchkins

32 posts • Page 1 of 4 • 1, 2, 3, 4
 by lollypopkin » Wed Jun 18, 2008 8:05 pm

Both Heights council candidates are reaching out to the little people. Sean got a midget girlfriend. Briggies boyfriend is in a picture with a midget pissing in his ear. Will they be bringing Tony Soares up to do walks next? Thank you, thank you very much by Elvis » Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:44 pm

a special shoutout thank you to timmy who is a dimmy and to dj. as exekutive diwrecktor and campain manager you too did a nice job of screwing over suan agin. we will remember and reward you well for your loyalty. Beets preparing to give Drunken Jamie a golden shower! by Howard Johnson » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:23 pm 
Howard Johnson


Drunken Jamie by Take one down and pass it around » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:26 pm

Howard Stern himself thinks Drunken Jamie is crazy but funny at the same time.

What you are about to read is all true! We have it all documented on home video!

I must first explain that in no way, shape of form do I nor James agree with Drunken Jamie\'s antics. James is mortified by Drunken Jamie\'s actions. I on the other hand, being just good old Jamie, figure to make some money from Drunken Jamie. Shock humor has a large market and there is no better people to have behind you than the crew from the Howard Stern show. Howard Stern himself thinks Drunken Jamie is crazy but funny at the same time. I think that if Drunken Jamie makes at least 15 million people smile, it\'s got to be funny. It\'s all love bro!

Now this is going to sound a little fucked up, ok real fucked up but follow me! I am writing this story from Jamie\'s perspective. I\'m the middleman, the balanced one. I like to self medicate by smoking pot, entirely believing it should be legalized. In fact, I\'m baked right now. I drink bottled water, eat good and write. My job is to help Beetlejuice in many ways , making sure nobody causes him discomfort or inflicts any pain upon him. Sean Rooney A.K.A. Boo can only do so much. If he\'s dealing with contracts, somebody has to be with Juice watching out for him. That is why I carry a 45 magnum. That and the fact that Boo needs - and depecote to control his schizophrenia. We can\'t let him kill somebody but I, a registered carrier, can shoot someone in the leg or hand. I am a charming salesman who enjoys central park under the stars. I like basketball, chicks and politics. I am the one who originally introduced the superstar Beetlejuice to Boo. It was a bar where the two would meet and become friends, creating magic. It\'s all love bro!

Now I can\'t decide who I feel more sorry for, James or Drunken Jamie. Probably it would be James because he is the one who suffers the consequences from Drunken Jamie\'s mistakes. Drunken Jamie will get locked up and James will wake up in jail. James is very indecisive. He\'s 30 yrs old and still lives at home with Mommy and Daddy. He\'s a Mommas boy but always says, \"My Mother is my best friend.\" What\'s wrong with that? James is timid, shy, even introverted. He\'ll lock himself in his room for days crawled up in a ball with the phone off the hook. James will never watch the home video tapes of Drunken Jamie. He\'s spiritual and a daily mediator. James can be spotted during the week kneeling in the back pew, repenting for Drunken Jamie\'s sins. He was taught by the nuns and then Christian Brothers and finally the Jesuits. James is a poet. His work is not unlike Bob Dylan or the late Tupac Shakur. Very deep. You get the point. It\'s all love bro!

Now I, Jamie, met a gentleman by the name of Boo who is an interesting cat himself. Boo, was the starting center for that 1988 High school dream team at St. Anthony\'s in Jersey City Nj. There was Bobby Hurley, Gerry Walker, Terry Dehere, Rodrick Rhodes and him. He\'s a project kid from Bayonne who had it tough, growing up with no Mom and a Dad who worked long hours to put him in a good school. Boo was in charge of himself and had to learn to be a man at an early age. That is why today, I believe he acts so immature, but in a good way. Despite being immature, he was able to get himself a 4 year scholarship to play Division I basketball at Duquesne in Pittsburgh Pa. I believe he could have gone pro but was kicked out for gambling on his own team. When I met Boo, it was if we met in a prior life. You get the point. Instant love bro!

Now he introduced me to the concept of dwarf tossing. He was working with another little guy and came up with the idea of tossing him in front of the Stern building in the dead of winter with temperatures below zero to be noticed. It worked, as he was invited up to talk to the King of all media. After the plug on Stern it became bigger than he would have ever imagined it. Boo was in charge of protection, driving, blowing up the mattresses and putting up with a lot of drunks at parties. He has said to me on many of occasions that it has all been worth it and does not take for granted where he is in life. He is doing something he enjoys and is his own boss. After six months or so, Boo told me he was looking to get another little guy and if I knew of anyone. So I introduced him to Lester, now known as Beetlejuce. We both said to him do you want to be a star? He responded by saying, \"I been a star like 44 times\". You get the point. Instant love bro!

Now Beetejuice is also from the projects. He had it tough as well. Constantly being taunted because of his small stature and tiny head. It drove me up a wall how cruel people could be. With he and Boo, it too, was like two old friends from a prior life reuniting. Instant love bro! Then Boo brought him over to Howard Stern and guess what? You got it. Instant love bro!

Now you are probably saying to yourself that I seem like a nice guy. I\'m a philosopher. I\'m a 16 year old boy at heart yet in a 30 year olds vehicle. I am the type of guy who gives money to bums. Boo and Beetle are the same way. What is so ugly about a bum? But if were a nice guy, I would not allow Drunken Jamie to come out. It\'s not that simple though. If I were really smart, I\'d figure it out but I\'m not. Though Drunken Jamie is beloved by more than 15 million people, many people worry about him including me. He\'s the definition of a weekend warrior. Drunken Jamie is also Beetlejuice\'s partner in crime. Beetle says, \"Where I go, Drunken Jamie goes\"! There is so many sick things that he has done. It\'s hard to begin, probably easiest if I just start a list and believe me the list will grow. It\'s just odd because I will be watching a tape of my own vehicle. I\'ll see my own body and say, \"Damn, who the hell is that\"? That dude is nuts! Drunken Jamie goes out and gets loaded and sometimes winds up in jail or even worse, the hospital. It\'s not fair but it sure is funny.

Drunken Jamie broke a Nj state record at 18 years old by getting a .34 alcohol level on the test during a D.W.I. The judge said that another half of beer and I would have been D.W.C. That\'s driving while in a coma. .35 is legally completely toasted. That\'s something to be proud of.

In a four day sitting during the shoot of Bubble Boy, he drank 210 beers. Later he got Beetejuice and Boo kicked out of the Hilton for walking the lobby of the hotel naked. When passed out at a Bachelor party, Drunken Jamie was the recipient of a golden shower by Beetle. Drunken Jamie\'s reaction, \"Not everyone can be as lucky as me. Beetlejuice is truly golden. It\'s all love bro!

Drunken Jamie mistakenly snorted foot powder, grated cheese and baking soda. I wonder what he thought that was?

Drunken Jamie found it enjoyable to whip cat shit around High Pitched Eric\'s apartment then chew it like an oatmeal cookie.

Drunken Jamie once jumped on a ministers back while he was preaching the gospel on the streets of Ny city.

Drunken Jamie finds it clever to spread his ass cheeks when mooning America. He says, \" it shows the beauty of us human beings\".

He experienced flying out of a car at 120 MPH. The reason he lived is because he did not have his seatbelt on and was very relaxed from being so drunk. He thought he was at the amusement park on a cool ride. Drunken Jamie was flat lined in the helicopter and shocked back to life on the way to the trauma center. However, it was James who woke up in the hospital with only a broken Fibula and some internal damage that would heal with rest. Guardian Angels are real, believe me. Then he signed himself out of the hospital despite the doctors advice. There I was smoking a fat joint in the middle of the parking lot, baked. My body was dead only 12 hours before. What did I do, laughed hysterically. Isn\'t it great? God kept me here on earth for a reason. They say, Only the good die young\"! If it were me or James in that car, we wouldn\'t have made it but because it was Drunken Jamie, being such a bad motherfucker, he we are. So in reality we have Drunken Jamie to thank for our lives. For the next couple years we suffered from post-traumatic syndrome. I\'ll tell you one thing, depression sucks! Thank God for weed. Over that time we have written many quality poems as well as a Book to deflect all the negative forces. Thank God for that or suicide would have been inescapable. Best friend Boo, \"Boo\" and Jamie often sit down together and write for hours at a time in a dim lit room and let go of our inner feelings. It may sound gay, but it\'s all love bro!

It was a shame when Jamie had to miss the Crazy Cabbie vs. Angry Black fight because Drunken Jamie was arrested for pissing in public. That afternoon Beetlejuice and Boo picked me up at the courthouse. Thanks to Beetlejuice they let me be heard by the judge first.

Drunken Jamie terrorized Hollywood Blvd. by being a nasty drunk from Nj. He was writing autographs to people, claiming to be the rock star Moby. The funny part is people actually believed it was Moby.

Drunken Jamie has called Boo\'s wife several times, telling her that he wanted to lick her juicy ass. Boo would ask me why I said this. My response, \"It wasn\'t me it was Drunken Jamie\". It\'s all love bro!

Growing up, well not really, Drunken Jamie, the evil triplets , drug of choice was PCP (angel dust) I always had the angels on my side. That\'s a good thing. It helped him make poor choices and got James arrested 15 plus times.

Drunken Jamie was at his best when the car accident settlement awarded him $75,000. In 1 year it was all gone. This is $75,000 after taxes we\'re talking about. It was spent on cocaine, dust, beer, cheap motels and sluts. When the money was gone so were his friends. Who would have figured?

Drunken Jamie really gave me a scare when all the beer was gone and no liq. stores or bars were open. He settled for Nyquil and 25mg of -.

Now it is pretty difficult to explain the story of Drunken Jamie and his crew without mentioning \"Puppet\'\', the X dwarf handler. Puppet was feeding lies to the Juice which is why Drunken Jamie fired him. Drunken Jamie was on the end of some serious fresh ones(punches) by Beetle because of these horrible lies. It just wasn\'t right. That and Puppets behavior were too radical. He is a compulsive liar and suffers from alcoholism / drug addiction 24/7. The reason I feel he did these things is because he was abandoned by his Mexican Dad and Cherokee Mom. A Jewish family felt sorry for him and adopted, naming him Robert Allan Haas. Robert Haas lives in a rundown apartment in Jersey city with 3 cats and a 48 year old Phillopino woman called Helen. She barely speaks the English language. The reason they married was so that she could get a green card and he would get $10,000 for his cocaine addiction. She has to be the ugliest Phillopino woman I have ever seen. Drunken Jamie would still fuck her though. All she ever says is \"Get to the out\"! The funniest thing of this part of the story is that Beetlejuice was the witness at the courthouse to their marriage, if that\'s what you want to call it. Beetlejuice\'s signature is not even valid in the court of law. This means their marriage is illegitimate. Helen\'s job is to do the laundry, cook, clean up our beer cans and say, \"Get to the out\"! Which we never listened to anyway.

Puppet was good for one thing and that was introducing us to a fine19yr old Spanish chick who came on limo rides and did whatever we asked her to. Like Puppets Mom, Dad, and our crew, the girl now had abandoned him too. She was now our girl. Every team should have one.

One of my most enjoyable memories with Puppet was when a 52 year old hooker with no teeth, pissed on his face. He lye there hopeless after an evening of hard core narcotics and Booze. Isn\'t it great? Puppet cheats on Helen constantly with a 16 year old schitzo, clepto who steals Helen\'s panties because she is homeless. This fuck, on top of all this, has the single most annoying laugh in the world.

Puppet went to computer school and learned absolutely nothing. I guess he went to say he did something else other than just Booze and drugs. I honestly think he is in love with a man named Weesie who often does endless hours of snorting coke with him. Drugs will make a man do strange shit. Drunken Jamie fired him and Dave the limo driver because Boo is running a serious business and they didn\'t understand. So what if we pissed in his Bourbon bottles in the limo? That is no reason to overcharge Beetlejuice\'s supporters. Puppet always had an excuse when we\'d asked him to help with things outside of work. He claimed to have gone on 30 job interviews in 1 week alone. I don\'t know how he did it when he slept 20 hours day. What guy would give up 6 hrs of work with Beetlejuice to make the same money working 40 hours answering a phone for someone else? Simply because he couldn\'t control his life. We believe he wanted to be fired because we would constantly joke about how much money he would waste on drugs and Booze.

Now getting back to Drunken Jamie, you had to see the time he dumped ziti, roast beef, meatballs and wings over Hipitched Eric\'s head and spit beer in his face. It\'s all love bro!

Now the fact is that Drunken Jamie is fucked up in the head but he is a good drunk and is Boo\'s and Beetles right hand man. He and Beetlejuice do stand-up together. Kind of like Abott and Costello. Watch out Las Vegas! Drunken Jamie does fantastic impersonations . I can\'t do them but he can. They include: Al Pacino, Joe Pesci, Robert Deniro, and Gerry the retarded girl from The Facts Of Life. Drunken Jamie is a funny fuck.

Drunken Jamie pulled what some may say was his funniest prank. When he jumped over the wall at Medieval Times. He dropped feet to the sand with laser in hand and got chassed by security guards as he ran around some horses. Running on a treadmill naked in the gym, while people work out, has got to be a close second.

Now what\'s good is, \"Boo\" kidnaps Drunken Jamie and takes him to the quiet farmland where I can become me again. I\'m better off down there anyhow. We\'re all family, he, wife, son, Beetlejuice and I. Plus it\'s a lot better setting for smoking erb. As Beetle would say, \"It\'s more better\"! You can\'t blame Drunken Jamie for partying hard. Why the hell would you do anything half assed? Most people become famous then drunks. With Drunken Jamie it\'s the other way around. His job is to ride around in limo\'s attend up to 3 parties a night, drink beer packed in ice with high and low class hookers who think he\'s got lots of money. What more could you ask for? And I get paid for it, well not me, you know who, I don\'t have to say his name. By now you should have my 3 personalities in order. You got to be crazy if you feel sorry for that guy. He\'s got the best job in he world. His beloved friend Beetlejuice who after Scary Movie 2 on July 4th and Bubble Boy on August 3rd, will have much clowt in Holly Wood, claims he wants Drunken Jamie to be in the next movie with him. You get the point. IT\'S ALL LOVE!

E-mail James, Jamie, or Drunken Jamie HERE. you are sure to get one of them.

To hire Drunken Jamie for a party and see him do some of these unbelievable things E-mail him HERE!

Take one down and pass it around


Re: Heights residents munchkins by Hiawatha Schwartz » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:27 pm

James Waddleton=Jamie Wallington=Drunken Jamie, Dan Waddleton\'s nephew. Dan Waddleton was Heights Councilman when McCann was mayor, 1990 thereabouts.

Remind people of right, wrong
The Jersey Journal
In the past year in Jersey City, more murders have occurred than normal. But then again, murder isn\'t a word often associated with normal. For a single person to try and attempt to cast the blame on Mayor Jerramiah T. Healy is ignorant. During this time in history, Jersey City is experiencing a tremendous population growth. With such growth will come incidents.

Those of us who know the truth see a mayor who is doing all he can to stop the problem and who is open-minded to doing whatever it takes. Among other things, he has created a gang task force, and hired more police, though I believe more can be done by thinking outside the box.

What we need is a public information blitz to create a think-tank reaching into minds citywide, reminding all of what is right and wrong. With all due respect, I ask Mayor Healy and Stan Eason, director of communications, to consider my recommendation.

Hiawatha Schwartz


James Waddleton by Just call me Moe » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:29 pm It seems like one of the ongoing themes in the video is to take Drunken Jamie somewhere and wait for him to make an ass out of himself or wait until he passes out, then dump shit on him or piss in his mouth. In some of the scenes I actually thought that he was dead. Apparently nobody likes this guy and he really gets it from a hooker who throws a bottle at him and makes this fool bleed. I almost felt bad for the guy until I saw him do the same stupid shit over and over again. (Note to self: never fall asleep after a drinking binge if Beetlejuice is in the room.) Just call me Moe

 by Pinot Noir » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:31 pm 
After boarding a plane in Los Angeles for a return flight to New York following an appearance in California, "Drunken Jamie" became unruly, throwing objects about the cabin and being generally disruptive as the plane waited for clearance to depart.

Authorities at LAX quickly boarded the aircraft and handcuffed Beetlejuice, his manager Sean and the intoxicated "Drunken Jamie." The trio was quickly removed from the plane, which was then allowed to depart after a brief delay.

After a thorough investigation, Sean and Beetlejuice were released and allowed to return to New York on a later flight. "Angry Jamie" however, was detained in Los Angeles and will probably appear in court Monday, possibly facing several charges.

Arriving in New York several hours later, Sean still sported a reminder of the experience -- imprints on his wrists from the handcuffs were still visible.

Pinot Noir

 by Let the sun shine in » Sat Jun 21, 2008 7:45 pm

Healy is drunk and NAKED down th e shore. Healy is drunk and NAKED on his porch. Healy got a STRIPPER for vice mayor. Healy give drunk and NAKED Jamie a softball job. Looks like a patent to me.

Let the sun shine in

 by Barolo » Sat Jun 21, 2008 8:10 pm

so thats what suan does on his vacation. How Drunken Jamie got a city job by ReMARKable! » Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:35 am

I guess do in Briggie is how Drunken Jamie got a no work job with the city.

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