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Bawful After Dark: End of the Playoffs
By Dan B. at 9:16 PM "Say Queensbridge!"
I am devastated. My dad has not cared about the NBA in a decade. The "slow it down and runs isolations every single play" era turned him away and he stuck solely with college ball. (Then the University of Kentucky he adores went into the Tubby Smith Era of clock-burning post-ups and bad jumpers as the shot clock expires, where even Rajon Rondo couldn't make it fun.)

But Dad has always talked about how great Larry Bird was, how sweet Kevin McHale's post moves were, how much fun the Bird/Magic rivalry was, and how fast and exciting the Showtime Lakers were. Considering he usually talked about Bird and the Celtics (which got me into watching the Celtics myself and becoming a fan), it took me by surprise a few days ago when Dad suddenly was rooting for the Lakers!! It turns out he has always been a Lakers fan, but just respected the hell out of Bird and the rest of those 1980s Celtics. And he just never bothered to tell me this, but got to be all excited and happy last night as I turned off the TV at the buzzer and slammed the remote down on the table and walked off in disgust. So, uh, happy Father's Day?

Worst of Game 7 in Pictures: (What's really going on behind that smile? Here's my best guess...)
"My own son has already won as many NBA championships as his dear old father. This is terrible! A travesty! One of the great injustices of all time! He averaged one point a game in the playoffs! I am ashamed to be his father! I'm not a critic, just a reporter of facts." Kobe practices his yoga poses instead of practicing his jump shot Okay, seriously, Celtics own Wyc Grousbeck is kinda creepy looking. He and Mikhail Prokhorov should totally hang out. Garnett cops a feel of some celebrity manboob There are so many things wrong with this picture, T.O. ...This picture speaks for itself
Thank you so much for being with us all season. Your comments make it more than worth our effort to bring you an entertaining alternative viewpoint of the NBA. Please make sure you stick with us during the off-season. We've still got plenty to keep you entertained. (Hell, the NBA Draft is Thursday! I will be on vacation and out of town, but you can bet I'll be checking the comments on my Blackberry about that!)
 I miss Walton so much. He should be a commentator on most of the NBA games, especially the finals. I doubt even if I was tripping on acid I couldn't come up anything half as hilarious a Walton-ism. Any word on if he'll be coming back next season?
6/18/2010 9:47 PM Heritage! Heritage! Oh happy day, Dan B, you've discovered your true sports lineage; you're the son of a Lakers fan! Perfect timing too, now you can spend father's day celebrating your team's latest championship with dad!

Speaking of whom, I think we should all follow his fine example and respect our rival teams as if they were our own. I'll get the ball rolling:

Better luck next year, Celtics! =D
6/18/2010 10:11 PM Walton said he contemplated suicide within the last 2 years because of severe back problems that left him feeling like he was "submerged in a vat of scalding acid with an electrifying current running through it."
6/18/2010 10:17 PM With all of this "Kobe belongs up there with Magic and Jordan" horseshit that's flowing pretty strong right now, I couldn't help but to think we need a moment like this where Phil Jackson just speaks the truth...

"Kobe, Michael Jordan was a great player. He helped me to a Three-peat Repeat. He is the best of all time. Kobe, you're no Michael Jordan."

Seriously, who the hell started this insane talk? I almost choked on my late night snack when I heard Mark Jackson say, "Move over Magic, blah, blah, blah..." Are you fucking kidding me????

To all the Laker fans, do you really believe that?
6/18/2010 10:31 PM I SO didn't need to see that Artest-Pierce manlove pic...That Pau picture is hilarious, though. He looks like a kid throwing a tantrum because his big brother wants to take his ball back. Heretic: Bill Walton is randomly going to be doing 5 Kings games, I heard (via Sactown Royalty). Not sure how the Maloofs scrounged enough out of their little piggy bank to do this, but...what this means:

"And Tyreke the Freak Evans slams it home for the most phenomenal head-fake of ALL TIME!"

"So, I'm here to address the rumor that the Kings want to move to a more profitable market, like Las Vegas. I can tell you that if the Kings move to Las Vegas, they still will not wash away the stink that is the status of being the only team in major professional sports history to have actually spent time loitering in the psuedo-metropolis of Omaha, Nebraska. That's right. Omaha. Yeah, I don't even know how the Kings didn't get contracted in the wake of the ABA merger."

80's NBA: If anyone wants to say "KOBE MORE RINGS! MAGIC NOT AS GOOD!" then the only thing that needs to be pointed out is "1980 Finals MVP. As a ROOKIE. Subbing for Kareem."

End of discussion, now and forever.
6/18/2010 11:40 PM I don't know man. Where did I see this quote? Was it on ESPN? I forget. Anyway, I'll paraphrase.

A close teammate of Jordan commented about who is better between Jordan and Kobe. "I think Kobe's better. Kobe scored 81. Jordan never did, and don't think that he didn't try."

I'm not saying that I think Kobe is better than Jordan, but fuck, 81 points is 81 points.
6/19/2010 12:10 AM Now that I finally made it back to LA, I'm going on vacation for the next week, fishing in Alaska. I have no idea what kind of Internet access I'll have, so if you don't see me commenting know that I'm with you all in spirit.

Did Evil Ted ever come back from his trip into the wild?
6/19/2010 12:47 AM An open request, this has been eating away at me all week. Could someone explain the "Say Queensbridge now" Artest thing?

He's from Queensbridge. A rapper. Is it sort of a battle cry/gauntlet down indication?
6/19/2010 1:40 AM Kobe's so much better than Magic that he could drop 81 while ass raping Magic w/o a condom on. And he still wouldn't get HIV.

On a more serious note, the Kobe suckoff has gotten to the point where I'm afraid that w/ another championship or two people might forget that Shaq was ever even on the Lakers.
6/19/2010 2:07 AM Rather than focus on Kobe and his legacy (aka "the Kobe suckoff"), let's talk about Gasol and his legacy. From The Painted Area: "Folks, Pau Gasol has not only officially shed the "soft" label, but also based on past precedent, he is now a Hall of Famer, especially considering that he is 29 years old, and will have more chances to add rings, numbers and All-Star Games."

Thoughts? Agree? Disagree?
6/19/2010 2:32 AM Pau for the hall of fame? I suppose it's in how you envision the institute.

Is he a special player? He is for this era, when players who don't have the coordination to rub their tummy and and pat their heads at the same time are considered to have "potential" as long as they're strong and fast, and wouldn't know positioning if it Kobe'd them in the ass.

Is he special in a broader, timeless sense? Hell no. But how many HOFers are?
6/19/2010 3:16 AM @Heretic. I used to love Bill Walton! Before he went to ESPN, he was the Clippers color commentator, and he'd just rip that team apart every single game. He was SVG before SVG. The line I always remember him saying is "Bo Outlaw is taking himself out of the game. There must be a cheeseburger under his chair."
6/19/2010 3:19 AM Gasol is amazing, with a team around him like the lakers I think he could dominate with more ball. To me he is a bit of a weird player, I still think he would sink on a bad team, but surround him with good players and he is a gem.
6/19/2010 4:10 AM Bah the comparisons are bullshit. Jordan didn't win an MVP as a rookie so Magic is better than Jordan. It took more years for Jordan to win a championship than kobe, so kobe is better than Jordan. Jordan took more game winning playoffs shots so Jordan is better than kobe. Jordan has more rings than magic so he's better than magic. Kobe scored more points than both of them in a single game so kobe is better.

Its just impossible to say who's greater. There are too many facets of the game and their rank in importance is different to everyone. All three guys have led their teams to championships, all 3 guys were crucial to their teams success and all 3 guys were vicious competitors. Once you get to that level the rest is just nitpicking. Bird, Magic, Jordan,Kobe, Kareem etc have reached that plateau where saying who is best is simply based on personal bias instead of accomplishments. For all the players above(including his airness) you can say "Well he did but he didn't do like ".

Oh and happy Lebron Appreciation Day!
6/19/2010 10:44 AM 
Pau was made of pure goo in the Phoenix series but was much better in the Boston series. I don't think he has shed that soft title quite yet. I'd like to see him rip balls down consistently and dunk the ball hard instead of gingerly placing it into the basket. From a strict skill standpoint he is one of the best big men in the NBA but alas his European heritage may keep him soft to the end of his days.
6/19/2010 10:47 AM i´m not not a lakers fan by any means, but this site has become more and more biased as other writers started to participate... dan b, that anaconda guy etc.. get out of here... long live mr bawful
6/19/2010 11:55 AM Faizan said...
I'm gonna disagree with Anonymous...I really enjoy the guest posts as long as they are not doing the WotN's (only Bawful adds the right mix of disgust, humor, disbelief, and disappointment to those). Chris and Dan B. are excellent, Anaconda churns out excellent posts as well (the "Stop it" post on Phoenix was great). Statbuster had one of my favorite posts of all time on one of the drafts a couple of years ago. Evil Ted's running diary was funnier than Bill Simmons's.

The only writer I don't particularly enjoy is WildYams, although that may be b/c of my unabashed Laker hate. Or it could be because he has a tendency to ramble and isn't funny.
6/19/2010 12:55 PM Heretic: The part where I will always notch Mamba down is the "led his teams to championships" - maybe true now, but less so in the dynasty years.

Or kinda how I think of it: Jordan was the greatest combination of skill and winning we'll ever see, but Russell was a greater winner (without being anywhere near the offensive machine).

Faizan: thanks. Of course, being a (somehow, they're still in Sacramento) Kings fan, the disgust, disbelief, and disappointment is going to come in due time, don't worry. :P

Ash: And Wilt scored 100. Does that make him better than Jordan? (rhetorical question) I totally get your point though.
6/19/2010 1:06 PM King Crab crawls over to the metropolis of Akron to try to assuage Northeast Ohian fears.
6/19/2010 1:17 PM Am I the only one thinking that the Jabolany is basically the inanimate version of Howard Stern?
6/19/2010 1:40 PM Wild Yams- if you are seriously going to be in Alaska, look me up. Bawful has my email address buried in his inbox somewhere.

I live in Anchorage, which I assume you will at least pass through, so get in touch if you want to grab a beer or I can give you some recommendations or advice on avoiding the tourist traps and such.

Fishing for Kings?
6/19/2010 1:42 PM Faizan - Lucky for you I'm not really much of a contributor here any more, as it's been about six months since I posted anything.

AK Dave - I'm in Alaska as I type this, but unfortunately I'm not going to be going anywhere near Anchorage. Instead I'm down near Ketchikan and will be out on a fishing lodge for the next five days (I have to take a sea plane in the morning to get there). I'd love to come back and go up your way in the future though, so if I do I'll definitely look you up. And yep, I'm fishing for Kings (and any other salmon) and for halibut :)
6/19/2010 3:29 PM People might be forgetting that the Hall of Fame in Springfield isn't only the NBA HOF. It's the basketball HOF, and it includes NCAA and international play. So yes, Pau qualifies as being one of the top two international players of the new millennium (along with Ginobili), in addition to his two NBA titles and three Finals appearances as the team's second best player.

The biggest HOF travesty is all of the mediocre college coaches who get selected, instead of Jamaal Wilkes with his four NBA titles, three All-Star selections, two all-NBA defensive team selections, and being the second best player on the greatest NCAA team of all time (88-game win streak, two titles and a third Final Four appearance).

The HOF finally righted a long-time wrong by voting Dennis Johnson. It's about time it does the same for Wilkes.
6/19/2010 4:55 PM Well the reports are officially in. R.I.P., Manute Bol.
6/19/2010 6:02 PM Ash -- 81 points is 81 points.

But it is also 81 points against the Toronto Raptors who have been known to have historically embarassing defense. This coming from a Raptors fan...

My point is: it's impressive but also an overrated 81....
6/19/2010 6:39 PM As noted above, Gasol will make the Hall of Fame. He led Spain to the World Championships which means an awful lot. He is the best basketball player in his country's history (and it's not even remotely close). His NBA career is rounding out with multiple all-star selections, 3 Finals appearances, 2 rings and obviously a chance to add more since next year he will still probably be on a team favored to win the championship.

Also, by the time he becomes eligible for HoF consideration, the advanced stat movement will have progressed to a point where his contributions will be held in higher value. He beat Kobe this year in the playoffs for WP/WP48 and came very close to beating him in PER. In fact, if you visit Professor Berri's blog, you'll see a conversation where everyone agrees that Pau is Batman and Kobe is Robin.

I think this title punched his ticket. The conversation for his legacy going forward now is things like "best European/foreign player of his era". Dirk's MVP gets in the way here, but another title will help Gasol's cause, especially if he picks up a Finals MVP.
6/19/2010 7:39 PM Fundefined said...
Pau is not a HOFer. Maybe if he did better solo in Memphis then it would be considered. He is however the 2nd best bigman overall now and best offensive bigman. Also he lacks a catchy memorable moment or game that serves as a ad maker.
6/19/2010 8:03 PM What do Ron Artest and Kobe Bryant have in common? Ron has a therapist; Kobe is <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAPEjcQvqSk>therapist</a>
6/19/2010 8:10 PM aK Dave said...
B.A.D. has been a success, I must say. Dan B carries the bawful torch high and proud, and it's great to get a second dose of this blog in the afternoon.

Wild Yams: the Southeast is gorgeous- have fun down there. Good luck with the fishing- let us know if you get a King; it takes a little luck to land a decent one. Halibut is a little more of a sure-deal. Enjoy the great white north, eh? (I know its not Canada, but close enough!)
6/19/2010 8:30 PM RIP, Manute. Here's a good 2006 article on him from SI in case anyone is interested.
6/19/2010 8:43 PM @Wild Yams.

Actually ET was on the tail end of the game 7 comments. He was pretty cool about the whole thing, and even congratulated the Lakers, which I thought was pretty classy after the whole "I hope Ron Artest ruins the Laaaaakerrrrrrrs" chant at the beginning of the season. In Evil Ted's defense, I thought it was hilarious, and at the time had about a 60% chance of coming true.

All I have to say is that the the Celtics were the team that I felt we HAD to have a victory over to prove we were the best team in the league. They have been the best team in the east for the last three years, and have lived up to the Celtic heritage.
6/19/2010 9:05 PM That's a horseshit argument. Jordan spent most of his first quarters and first halves getting his teammates involved. He understood how to keep them involved so they could play at their best to help them win. Jordan didn't give a damn about points, he just wanted to win at all costs. He'd dunk on his momma if that's what he needed to do to win a game.

Case in point, box scores for Jordan's 69 pt game and Kobe's 81 pt game, respectively

Jordan's game went to overtime while Kobe's didn't. Jordan took 9 less shots, 7 less 3 pointers, shot a higher percentage, had 12 more rebounds and 4 more assists. Kobe clearly was focused on only scoring that game, while Jordan still focused on all the other aspects of basketball. Jordan also played against a decent team, while the Craptors were a historically bad defense. Jordan's 69 pt game was much more impressive than Kobe's 81 pt game.

My whole point is, Jordan didn't just try to score all the time, like Kobe often does. Jordan did whatever was the best thing for his team to win. Its insulting to Jordan that Kobe's 81 pt game is a better game than Jordan ever had. The reality is that these Kobe-Jordan comparisons are alive because ESPN commentators keep it going. Whether they really believe it, or they're just trying to sell the NBA as having a player on Jordan's level, I don't know. I hope its more the latter than the former.
6/19/2010 9:34 PM And about Gasol and potential HOF status, he's not there yet but if he wins 1 more ring as Kobe's sidekick while playing at this current level, he's definitely in the discussion. 2 more rings and I think its a near lock.
6/19/2010 9:37 PM alexlee382 said...

not saying that kobe is better than jordan (he isn't), but that logic is faulty.

jordan didn't play against the detriot pistons every day.
6/19/2010 10:19 PM 81 points doesn't mean a damn thing. It's ONE game... against a crap defense in the regular season...

Is it incredibly impressive? Yes. Should it have any meaning as far as "legacy" is concerned? Hell no.

Kobe is one of the best of his era, but he's far from what Jordan was... and honestly he's probably pretty far down the all-time list.. there's no way you can convince me he should be thought of as better than Magic, Bird, Dr. J, West, Kareem, Wilt, Russell, Robertson....

As for Gasol being a HOFer? By the end of his career I doubt anyone will question that being the case.
6/19/2010 10:28 PM First, the Raptors had Chris Bosh...

Second, it's not like Jordan played in a super-tough era... there were some cupcake teams back then and he STILL didn't advantage.

Either way, I didn't say who was a better player!
6/19/2010 11:59 PM 
All I'm saying is that who cares about the 81 points. To me, it doesn't show how great Kobe is, maybe how selfish he was playing. And again, I've been watching the Raptors terrible, make-you-want-to-kill-someone terrible defense for years and scoring 81 points on a "hot" day for Kobe Bryant just doesn't seem as impressive as everyone keeps making it seem.

I really don't think it's a legitimate argument to make when comparing MJ and Kobe...
6/20/2010 12:17 AM Damn, that's sad about Manute Bol.

On a lighter note, did anybody else scroll through the pictures and first think 'Why is Mr. Bean in here?', only to find out it was Wyc? Yeah, I'm probably the only one.
6/20/2010 2:33 AM Pau Gasol was HOF before he joined the Lakers. It's not just the NBA HOF. It's international and NCAA too. He's the best player in Spain's history, as noted above. He led them to the 2006 World Championship. Drazen Petrovic is in the HOF, and he wasn't as good as Gasol or Ginobili, who's also a lock for the HOF, even if he had never played for the Spurs and stayed in Europe his entire career.
6/20/2010 3:23 AM 
Wasn't Gasol Injured when he "led" Spain to a world championship? Yes he was.
6/20/2010 4:45 AM I totally hate it when people call players soft just because they're European.
They are white, they aren't very musuclar, they sometimes look goofy and they don't jump out of the building so they must be soft.

@ Heretic

Dunking a basketball hard doesn't make you a tough player and not doing it doesn't make you soft. Amar'e Stoudemire is proving my point one 5 rebound game at a time.
6/20/2010 10:29 AM 
Also watching helplessly as the ball bobs on the rim and then falls out after you had placed it delicately on the tip of the rim also does nothing to improve your toughness. Also players think twice about getting up to block a hard dunk that may have them posterized over and over again on sports center but when it comes to a gentle lay up even the meekest defender may try to block or tie you up.

Amare simply doesn't position himself well for rebounds, I doubt he has the instinct for it but he is a hell of a lot tougher than Gasol.

Put perkins' toughness into gasol and he would easily be 3 times better than he is right now. Plus he should cut down on the flopping and the screaming.
6/20/2010 11:46 AM @ The dude abides

This also brings up the question, would you rather be the alpha dog super star on a shitty team or play second fiddle on a championship team?. I know a lot of players say "its all about the ring man, i'll do whatever it takes". But I seriously doubt that, case and point the cAnswer, who will be making his triumphant return next season! I can't wait!
6/20/2010 11:50 AM Blogger The Dude Abides said...

Good point, I forgot about that about the HOF. In that case he's definitely a HOFer right now. I think that's retarded though, they should break it up into NBA, International, and College HOF.
6/20/2010 12:11 PM Anonymous: Apostrophe's softness is all mental, though he'll deny it to Craig Sager when pressed (as he did in Game 3 of the conference finals). You know, because 3-13 in Game 6 wasn't proof that you do NOT give 100% all the time, right?

Caleb Smith: For that matter, Wilt had a _100_ point game. Does that make him greater than Kobe? (And as much of a non-fan as I am of Lord Mamba, this is also a rhetorical question that I think extends nicely from the point you made.)
6/20/2010 1:57 PM I'm sorry, but these whose better arguments is like a dick measuring contest using someone else's dick. And should be below everyone except the tards on sportscentral, cuz, you know, they got nothing better to do than try and be cool anyways.

but then again, what else would sports buffs talk about? I dont like my brain.
6/20/2010 3:59 PM Stay classy LA...

6/20/2010 8:05 PM And people say LA fans have no passion.
6/20/2010 10:23 PM Waiting on food at a Red Lobster in Billings, Montana so I haven't had time to read through all the comments in detail lately, but thanks to those who have supported my efforts to add a little extra bawful to your day (ak dave's comment was quite nice in particular).

Also, golfawful historical collapse by Dustin Johnson today at the US Open.

RIP Manute Bol. :(
6/20/2010 10:33 PM @Czernoblog: he broke his foot in the closing minutes of the semifinal game against Argentina. Spain lost a five or six point lead after he went out, and only won the game because Argentina fouled Calderon intentionally with 20 seconds left and a tie score so he couldn't run out the clock for the last shot. Spain was still going to defeat Greece in the finals, with or without Pau.
6/21/2010 3:14 AM Some Euro-bawfulness:

- "In what must be some kind of playoff record, 18 players were ejected in the melee and the game ended as a three-on-three match." Check out the videos. http://www.ballineurope.com/countries/serbia/partizan-belgrade-hemofarm-stada-serbian-basketball-championship-fight-6681/

- Also, FC Barcelona (Rubio's team, among others) got swept 3-0 by Caja Laboral (with maybe-Spur Tiago Splitter, who won finals mvp) in the ACB finals after going a combined (Spanish League and Euroleague) 56-5 over the season while winning by an average of 15.6 points...

- The Greek championship also got decided in rioting fashion. "Various incendiary devices were thrown in the area of the Panathinaikos bench, some with amazing accuracy." http://www.ballineurope.com/countries/greece/panathinaikos-olympiacos-greece-basketball-championship-riot-7669/
6/21/2010 3:16 AM jodial said...
I was at Kobe's 81 point game, 10 rows back.

The Lakers were down 20 in the first half on a night where Kobe was already hot and nobody else could throw the rock in the ocean.

Then Kobe went supernova and the Lakers took the lead late in the third quarter. What, was he supposed to start passing to Kwame Brown, Smush Parker, and Chris Mihm?

Believe me. 81 was IMPRESSIVE.
6/21/2010 3:25 AM Before losing the ACB finals, the FC Barcelona won the Euroleague and the King's Cup. It's just a point, it's difficult to win it all, specially when everybody is trying to turn you off. But 3-0 it's a great difference :D
6/21/2010 4:46 AM Stay classy Boston...

6/21/2010 5:18 AM Don't forget the 62 in 3 quarters that outscored a Dallas team that went to the Finals that year. But that Mavericks squad didn't win the championship, so that was probably an overrated 62 in 3 quarters.
6/21/2010 5:29 AM I'm just so sick of people comparing Kobe and Jordan. Jordan completely raised the level to which superstars are expected to perform, even more so than Magic and Bird. I really think he is pretty untouchable. But who freaking cares? Only media idiots keep talking up this story. Kobe tries to be the greatest, comes up a little short, and in the meantime wins a lot of rings, sets records, terrorizes the league, and is generally one of the greatest to the play the game.

As a Lakers fan, Kobe ain't perfect, but he's been good enough for back-to-back rings, and that's pretty good.
6/21/2010 10:24 AM Do better in memphis? he had a 50 win team with his best Team-mates as follows......Mike miller, Shane Battier, James Posey, Bonzi wells....right
Can you win a or get out of the first round with these players as your no.2?
6/21/2010 1:00 PM Kobe wearing this t-shirt at the victory parade. That snake looks suspiciously like a 2, as in 2 MVPs (more like one and a half based on Game 7, but whatever.) I had to go to the website to see the rings. Guess we know where his head is at.


Then again, to the shock of no one, it's a Nike shirt. I think I'm at the point where I can no longer blame the athletes for their massive egos, not when Nike is feeding it to them by pulling amateur video of a half-assed dunk on someone who hasn't won a title and making the star of the last two title teams wear a shirt that blatantly says, "it's all about me." Remember last year's four rings foam hand shirt.

The only reason I'm watching is because it's 80 degrees in LA, and there a good chance for some decent cleavage.
6/21/2010 1:33 PM Damn that's a nice t-shirt. I'd buy it just to make Celtics fans boil.
6/21/2010 2:33 PM Anonymous TransINSANO said...

I saw that whole game. Mavericks sucked at D too, but they weren't nearly as bad as the Craptors. I think that game was more impressive than the 81 pt game.
6/21/2010 4:23 PM @Adria...are you Pau's bro? I think I saw you at the parade ;-)
6/21/2010 5:06 PM Late to the party - but "No homo" would be a great alternate caption for that first picture.
6/22/2010 4:17 PM
