Harry Potter Mother Ghoul's Nursery Rhymes

MOTHER GHOUL'S NURSERY RHYMES AND LULLABIES

**Disclaimer: This is a non-profit tribute to the works of JK Rowling who created and, together with her publishers and licensees, owns the characters and settings elaborated herein.**

**Move over "Beedle the Bard". Here comes Mother Ghoul...**

* * *

**_Foreword_**

This edition of traditional nursery rhymes and lullabies is reprinted for the 5th centenary of the Potter victory. Some scholars believe the majority of these rhymes reference events in Potter's life, but this is generally considered to be merely popular myth. A more likely theory is that they are corruptions of Muggle rhymes, identified in parentheses in the text. (Ed.)

* * *

**_Rockabye Firstie  
(Rockabye baby)_**

Rockabye firstie on the broomstick,  
When you say Up, the broom jumps up quick,  
When you hop on, the broomstick will fly;  
Away goes the broomstick up in the sky.

* * *

**_Sing a Song of Hogwarts  
(Sing a song of sixpence)_**

Sing a song of Hogwarts, completely out of tune,  
Hide a magic mirror in a secret room;  
First you get past Fluffy, then the Devil's Snare,  
Then you chase the key-birds that are flying through the air.  
The king is on the chessboard, you play your way across,  
The troll's already knocked out, you pass him with no loss,  
The poison's in the bottles, the end one gets you through,  
And just beyond the purple flames, Quirrell waits for you.

* * *

**_Peeves in the Room  
(Pease porridge hot)_**

Peeves in the room,  
Peeves in the Hall  
Peeves in the Potions cupboard (BOOM!)  
Slime covers all.

* * *

**_Quidditch Quidditch Quibbling  
(Diddle diddle dumpling)_**

Quidditch Quidditch quibbling, our boy Ron  
Tried to hex with a broken wand,  
Slugs away! till the morning's gone  
Quidditch Quidditch quibbling, our boy Ron.

* * *

_**Mudbloods Slumber  
(Ding dong bell)**_

Mudbloods slumber,  
Ginny's in the Chamber.  
Who took her in?  
Heir of Slytherin.  
Who went and got her?  
Little Harry Potter.  
What a naughty Horcrux he  
To try to drain Miss Weasley, G,  
Who ne-er did him any ill  
But killed the roosters  
And did his will.

* * *

_**Hatch a Snake  
(Pat-a-cake)**_

Hatch-a-snake, Hatch-a-snake, parselmouth man,  
Hatch me a snake as large as you can,  
Not an anaconda or a black mamba  
But a whopping giant Basilisk in a secret chamber.

* * *

**_This Little Toad  
_****_(This little piggie)_**

This little toad went to Hogwarts  
This little toad stayed home  
This little toad ate roast bug  
This little toad had none  
And this little toad croaked, "Whee, whee, whee, whee"  
All the way home

* * *

**_Hey Diddle Diddleus  
(Hey diddle diddle)_**

Hey diddle diddleus,  
The Chateau and Fidelius  
They shouldn't have trusted the rat.  
The big black dog howled in Azkaban  
And the Dursleys wound up with the brat.

* * *

**_Hogwarts students, Go In and Stay  
(Boys and girls, come out to play)_**

Hogwarts students, go in and stay,  
The full moon shines as bright as day,  
Bar the windows and bolt the door  
And you'll be safe from tooth and claw;  
Werewolves howl, werewolves run,  
So stay inside till the night is done,  
Or come as a rat, come as a stag,  
Come as a dog who likes a gag;  
Out the Willow and under the moon,  
A monthly adventure September to June.

* * *

**_Little Boy Potter  
(Little boy blue)_**

Little boy Potter, the Goblet of Fire  
Has chosen you Champion, Ron thinks you're a liar.  
Dragons and mermaids and mazes, oh my,  
And a Portkey to Voldemort; try not to die.

* * *

**_I'm a Little Doxy  
(I'm a little teapot)_**

I'm a little Doxy, black and hairy,  
Four legs, four arms, small as a fairy,  
With my beetlewings I take to flight;  
Better watch out, I like to bite.

I'm a little Snidget, gold and round,  
I fly very fast and dart all around,  
When you're playing Quidditch, don't use me;  
I'm too rare a bird, you see.

I'm a little Fwooper on the wing;  
I'll drive you mad if you let me sing;  
When you need to write to show your skills,  
My feathers make the prettiest quills.

* * *

**_Lavender Brown  
(Little Boy Blue)_**

Lavender Brown, it's time to snog,  
The Gryffindor students now watch agog.  
Where is Hermione? Better not follow,  
Her birds are as fierce as their feathers are yellow.

* * *

_**Tom, Tom, Merope's Son  
(Tom, Tom, the piper's son)**_

Tom, Tom, Merope's son,  
Stole founders' relics and away did run.  
He split his soul  
And took control  
But AKing Harry was an own goal.

* * *

**_Ducky Ducky Draco  
(Goosey goosey gander)_**

Ducky ducky Draco,  
Did you see the snake-o  
Eating a teacher as if she was a cake-o?  
Snatchers found a trio who wouldn't give their names  
And they ran off with your wands and you all got the blame.

* * *

_**See-saw Dumbledore  
(See-saw Margery Daw)  
**_

See-saw  
Du-umbledore  
Snape's come to get a new master  
Saving Lily is all that he wants  
But the whole thing ends up in disaster.

* * *

**_All Around the Flutterby Bush  
(All around the mulberry bush)_**

All around the flutterby bush  
The Fwooper chased the Kneazle  
The Fwooper sang its favourite song.  
Pop! goes the Kneazle.

Black beetle eyes five knuts a scoop,  
Some candy for a Sickle.  
That's the way the money goes.  
Pop! goes the Kneazle.

Up and down Diagon Alley,  
In and out of Weasleys',  
That's the way the money goes.  
Pop! goes the Kneazle.

Half a pound of Billywig stings,  
Half a pound of treacle,  
Mix it up and make it nice,  
Pop! goes the Kneazle.

* * *

**_Round and Round_**

Round and round the Billywig goes  
Where it stops, nobody knows  
Spinning, grinning, don't let it sting  
Or you'll float away like a bird on the wing.

* * *

**_Two Fat Pogrebins  
(Two fat gentlemen)_**

Two fat Pogrebins met in the lane,  
Bowed most politely, bowed once again.  
I will eat you. I will eat you.  
I will eat you again.

Two thin Vampires met in the lane,  
Bowed most politely, bowed once again.  
I will drain you. I will drain you.  
I will drain you again.

Two tall Dementors met in the lane,  
Bowed most politely, bowed once again.  
I will Kiss you. I will Kiss you.  
I will Kiss you again.

Two little gnomes met in a lane,  
Bowed most politely, bowed once again.  
Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo. Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo.  
Shoo, shoo, shoo, shoo again.

Two little pixies met in a lane,  
Bowed most politely, bowed once again.  
I will trick you. I will trick you.  
I will trick you again.

* * *

**_Hush Little Baby  
(Mockingbird)_**

Hush little baby, Silencio,  
Mumma's gonna buy you some Skele-gro  
If that Skele-gro don't cure you  
Mumma's gonna find a hinkypunk to lure you  
If that hinkypunk has no light  
Mumma's gonna buy you a watersprite  
If that watersprite is too wet,  
Mumma's gonna buy you an Erumpent,  
if that Erumpent's horn blows up,  
Mumma's gonna buy you a cute little Crup,  
If that little Crup won't play tag,  
Mumma's gonna buy you a moke-skin bag  
If that moke-skin bag won't shrink  
Mumma's gonna buy a kelpie black as ink  
If that kelpie won't dive down  
You'll still be the cutest baby wizard in town.

* * *

**_One, Two, Stir My Brew  
(One, Two, buckle my shoe)_**

One, two  
Stir my brew  
Three, four  
Charm open the door  
Five, six  
Turn gold into bricks  
Seven, eight  
Reparo a plate  
Nine, ten  
Transfigure a hen  
Eleven, twelve  
Bustling house-elves  
Thirteen, fourteen  
Trolls cavorting  
Fifteen, sixteen  
Dementors Kissing  
Seventeen, eighteen  
Death Eaters waiting  
Nineteen, twenty  
That was plenty.


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor