Gundam Wing/AC 1. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing, I just love it! Alison is an original character, but if you wanna use her, just ask and I'll let you! :)

The Lost Girl 

Part 1

Something was wrong. I could feel my body, as numb as it was, and I could feel something else, something holding me down. Ropes - I was tied down to what felt like a metal slab, coarse ropes cutting into my skin any time I tried to move. 

Despite being tied down, it felt like I was moving - swinging. I was dizzy, I realized, my head spinning in circles even as I was held in one place. I opened my eyes, trying to tell what was going on. 

It was dark in here, and cold. Very cold. I was wearing a tank top and shorts, and the cold air bit at my limbs almost more harshly than the rope. I blinked, hoping my eyes would adjust to the dark, but my vision did not improve. Somehow, with my eyes open, the vertigo slamming my brain was worse, and I closed my eyes again, wishing I was anywhere but here. 

Where... where had I come from? I suddenly wondered. I couldn't remember a thing - I must be dreaming. But - I never realized it when I was dreaming. So I probably wasn't dreaming. But - 

There was a peal of laugher - it seemed to be coming from right next to me, and my eyes flew open as I searched for the source of the sound. 

It abruptly cut off, leaving me shivering with more than just the cold. My head began spinning again, and I willed it to go away, with no luck. 

But I needed to know what was going on. 

"What's going on? Where is this?!" I called out into the darkness, hoping my voice conveyed more bravery and less confusion than I was currently feeling.

The laughter began again, this time echoing from all directions, right next to me, above me, opposite me... 

"I want to go back home!" I yelled, annoyed, dizzy, confused, and definitely very scared. 

The laughter lessened until it was only a soft chuckle. 

"You want to go home, do you? Well, little girl, I suppose that can be arranged." The voice itself was deep and cold, and seemed to be coming from everywhere at once. 

"Let me go!" I struggled as best I could against my ropes, feeling them cut into my skin, wishing they would go away, or that I at least had the strength to break them. 

"Well then, where shall I send you? Shall I make this fun, eh little girl? I think so, I think so..." The voice mused, more to itself than to me, I figured. 

"All right then, child," it said suddenly, and there was an air of commitment, of confidence in it now. "You shall go. And this shall be... most amusing..." It trailed off into chuckles once more, making my stomach twist with fear and disgust. 

It grew suddenly colder - there was a breeze now, freezing, biting my skin, and I tried to tell where it was coming from. But just as suddenly, my head began spinning wildly - now the whole room, the table I was on, they all seemed to be moving in multiple directions at once; I felt sick, dizzy, what was going on - 

Then there was a noise and I suddenly fell into the vertigo. 

SLAM!

I sat up straight, blinking in the darkness. What? 

Bad idea - the dizziness slammed down on me like a boulder and suddenly this room was moving, spinning, and oh God - 

I was going to be sick. 

I practically fell out of the bed I was in and half-stumbled, half-tripped through the darkness until I hit a wall - no, a door! Good, I needed a door right now. I fumbled until I found the handle, pulling it down and the door swung into the room. 

I was facing another door now, closed and across from me in the darkness. This was bad, my stomach was protesting, I was going to be sick any minute now - 

I glanced to the left and saw a bathroom - thanking something or someone I ran for it, stumbling in, not even bothering to turn on the lights, reaching the toilet just in time for my stomach to heave its contents - nothing much, in reality - upwards. 

It took a few agonizingly-long minutes for my stomach to realize that it was indeed empty, and the upheaval lessened. I managed to pull the handle before collapsing against the wall behind me, knees drawn up to my chest, shivering, heart pounding and lungs on overdrive. The room was still spinning, although not quite as badly as before. 

I just wanted it to stop, to stop moving and be still so that I could just lie down and maybe then everything would be okay. 

A light clicked on somewhere, and I heard a door opening. Light flooded out into the hallway, and I heard noise - shuffling. 

Then a voice. "Al? You in there?" 

It was a boy's voice, and it didn't sound like the owner was too much older than me. He sounded sleepy and confused. Just how I felt, only I bet he was a whole lot less dizzy. 

More shuffling. "Alison, is that you? Al - oh, man, hey, are you okay?"

A shadow fell across me, as best I could tell, and then I heard water running. More shuffling, and suddenly I was aware that the boy had crouched down next to me. 

He reached out a hand and wiped my sweaty bangs off my forehead. "Hey, are you all right?" he asked softly, voice heavily colored with concern. 

I couldn't say anything; I just sat there, trying to will the dizziness away. 

"Here," he said, offering me a glass of water. I looked up and saw his face, large, blue eyes wide, brown bangs falling over his nose, staring into mine with what looked like great concern. 

I took the glass, hand shaking, and lifted it to my mouth, suddenly aware of the terrible taste that had accumulated there. My stomach didn't seem to protest, so I took a few small sips before handing it back. He set it down next to him and just stayed there, crouched beside me, peering into my face with concerned eyes. 

"Better?" he asked. 

I nodded a bit, trying not to make myself any dizzier than I already was. It did seem to be lessening though, I noticed with a twinge of hope. 

"You... wanna get up off that cold floor?" he asked, cocking a tiny grin. "You look cold." 

"Yeah," I croaked, willing my voice to work, although it came out much softer and scratchier than I had intended. 

"Come on, let's get you to the couch," he said, and slipped an arm around my back and beneath mine. He helped me up - well, mostly lifted, actually, since I suddenly couldn't get anything to move - and led me down the hall to the end, where it opened up into a small kitchen, foyer, and living room. Flipping on the lights, he steered me over to the couch and sat me down on it, then stood there, looking down at me as I tried to sit up without falling over. 

"Thanks," I managed to get out, although it ended up being so soft that I wasn't sure if he even heard it. 

As he looked down at me, his eyes narrowed and his face grew darker. "What happened to you?" he asked, coming over, reaching out to my arm. As his fingers brushed me pain suddenly shot down my limb - I jerked away and looked down. 

There were huge red welts crisscrossing my arm - I looked to my other arm to see the same thing, and my legs were also covered with the welts. I looked up at him, confused, as he looked down at me with the same confusion, concern mixed in as well. 

"What happened?" he asked again. 

"I... I don't know. I thought it was just a dream..." I croaked out. It had been just a dream - hadn't it? 

"Well, you look sick," he informed me.

I nodded slowly. "I feel sick. And my head hurts," I said. Well, it wasn't exactly a lie. The aforementioned ailments were present. I was just confused as hell to boot. 

"Let me make you some coffee, all right? It's almost time for me to get ready to go anyway. You're staying home today," he said firmly, then turned and went into the kitchen, where I could soon heard coffee perking. 

I sat, shivering, on the couch, and tried to figure out what was going on. 

He came out a moment later to lean on the wall dividing the living room and the kitchen, crossing his arms and staring at me. 

"What?" I asked, tired and confused and scared and trying not to show it. 

"What's wrong?" he asked, eyeing me with that stare, pinning me down with his eyes. "Something's not right. What is it?" 

I paused, not sure whether to tell him what was really going on - that I didn't know who he was, or where this was, or what I was doing here. 

I sighed. Well, it was better than doing something completely stupid because I didn't know any better, right? Just tell the truth, out with it, and maybe he could help... 

"How long have I been here?" I asked forcefully, and his eyes narrowed. 

"What? What do you mean? You've been on the couch for three minutes, don't tell me your memory's that short," he said, cracking a small smile. 

"No. How long have I been here - in this place? Living here, or whatever. And who are you?"

The smile disappeared. His eyes grew wide again, and he stood up straight, taking a step back. 

"How long have you... who am I...? What? You... you don't know?" he asked, his voice horrified and his face echoing that. One hand went to his head, his long fingers burying themselves in his thick hair. It was long, I noticed, and I suddenly caught sight of a very long, brown braid swinging behind him, reaching down to his mid-thigh. 

Something was familiar. Something - 

I couldn't place it, and he was still staring at me like I had projectile leprosy.

"I... I don't know where this is," I said softly. "I... I don't think I know who you are." 

He shook his head, the braid swinging violently as he did so. "Oh man, this is not good. Not now, please... Aly, tell me you're lying. This is some joke, right? Come on, you know we need the equipment ready for the mission in two days, you have got to be kidding..." 

He looked up and saw that I hadn't broken into a grin, hadn't fallen over laughing at his stupidity in believing that I didn't know where I was, or even who he was. I wished I could, at that moment, seeing the nearly desperate look on his face.

"I'm not kidding," I said softly. 

"Oh, shit," he said, hand dropping from his head. "Listen, I'm going to go get the guys. You stay right here, don't move." 

With that, he turned and rushed out the door. I sat there, confused, scared, worried. I didn't know where this was at all, and I didn't know who he was. I didn't know why I was here, and that was obviously not a good thing. 

Yet... something in the back of my mind was whispering at me, telling me who he was. Only it wasn't loud enough to hear, and I couldn't tell what it was saying at all. I knew I knew who he was, where this was, but it just wouldn't come back to me. 

The dizziness, however, was slowly fading, and although I was cold and my head hurt, not to mention the red welts that seemed to cover most of my limbs, I was okay. 

I could smell the coffee in the kitchen, now finished. I debated getting up and going to get some, but my thoughts were cut off as I heard noise from out in the hall. 

"What do you mean, she can't remember? Maxwell, you are not pulling some stupid joke -" an unfamiliar voice was saying angrily.

"I'm telling you Wufei, it's not a joke! Unless she's pulling it on me, too. And I don't think she is," said the one familiar voice I recognized. 

"This is bad," came a third voice, this one sounding worried; it also sounded younger than the others. 

"Well, of course it's bad! We need that equipment -"

"We need her to remember," the familiar voice said. 

"Look, something will work out," said another voice. 

"It has to," said a fifth. 

Just then the braided boy walked through the door, followed by four other boys: one with short brown hair, one with longer brown hair that fell over his face, a smaller, blond boy, and a Chinese boy scowling behind them all. 

I just sat there as they entered the room, all looking at me, some with concern, some with annoyance. I blinked, not knowing who they were, but definitely not wanting them mad at me. 

"Look, Alison, this is not the time to be playing around," said the Chinese boy, not without a hint of the annoyance on his face creeping into his voice. 

"I'm sorry..." I said. "I.. I really don't know what's going on. I'm not joking."

"What happened?" the small, blond one asked, looking at me with the same concern as the braided boy, who'd walked over to stand beside me, leaning on one of the couch arms. 

"I don't know. I had this really weird dream... I don't know if it was even a dream... but somehow I woke up here."

"And was sick," the braided boy put in. 

"Are you okay now?" the blond asked. 

"I feel a little better. Look... I'm sorry, but... who are you? What am I doing here?" 

The braided boy next to me sighed. "Well... That's Quatre," he said, pointing at the blond, who gave me a warm smile. "And Heero, and Trowa, and Wufei," he said, pointing them out in turn. "And... I'm Duo." 

I nodded. Quatre looked up at Duo, his eyes filled with something I couldn't name... pity, maybe? 

"Well, look, this is all nice and fine, but what about our equipment? And our mission?" Wufei asked, folding his arms across his chest. 

"He is right," Trowa put in. "We do still have a mission today, Duo." 

"Yeah, I know, I know," Duo said, but he sounded as grim as Trowa. 

"Well, I'm not going today anyway," Quatre put in. "And neither is Heero. We can stay here and make sure she's all right, maybe see if we can jog her memory."

"Yeah, you could," Duo said with a sigh. "Yeah, fine." 

"We're meeting in ten minutes at the bay," Wufei said, and turned and left. Trowa cast me a somewhat sympathetic glance before turning and leaving as well. 

"Um... We'll come back down here in about an hour, okay?" Quatre asked softly. 

"Sure," I said, shrugging. "I don't think I can sleep anymore, anyway." 

"Right," Heero said; he'd been glaring at me the whole time, not menacingly like Wufei had, just like he was studying me or something... 

They left, Quatre casting Duo another glance before turning and exiting. 

Duo sighed again. "Listen... you sure you don't want me to stay or something? 'Cause I could - I'm sure Heero wouldn't mind going for me." 

"Um, no, that's okay," I said. He blinked, looking down at me with something like... disappointment, maybe? I couldn't tell - he hid it pretty well, but whatever it was, the look he was giving me made me want to sink into a hole so he wouldn't look at me like that.

And on top of that, there was something nagging me, and I was too afraid to put it into words. I didn't even know if I could - it wasn't a "thing", per se, but there was something tugging at my mind. But... I had to say something.... right...? 

"Duo?" 

He looked down at me; I thought I saw a glimmer of hope flash behind his eyes for just a second. "Yeah?" 

There was an awkward silence as I tried to figure out how to ask him... whatever it was I felt I should ask him. 

I couldn't do it. "Um, nevermind," I said, glancing back down at my lap, sighing. "It's nothing. I'll ask you later."

There was a moment more of silence, then he turned and walked back to his room. I could hear shuffling around, and he emerged a few minutes later, dressed all in black. He gave me one last glance, then headed for the door. 

He reached the door, hand resting on the lever, and stopped, turning partway so he could look at me.

"This is the part where you always tell me not to get myself killed," he said softly. 

I blinked. Just what kind of a mission were they going on? 

"Well then... I guess, don't get yourself killed. It... wouldn't be good. At all," I said weakly. 

He looked at me for a second more, blinked, and was gone. 


	2. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Once again, I don't own Gundam. Just Alison. 

Also, I should probably put in some author's notes that I really should have put in the 1st part, but was too stupid to think to do it ;O 

So I've taken writers' liberties and upped the pilots' ages to about 19; it's still the beginning of the series, though, and there are mainly skirmishes between Earth and the colonies at this point. I know I've made up my own little timeline and whatnot, so just ignore anything that doesn't agree with the series. Also, I'm pretty sure Heero's Wing Gundam isn't called Wing Zero (yet?) but just ignore that, I think it sounds cooler. ;) 

I would also like to thank my best friend, who knows who she is if she's reading this, 'cause she gave me the idea and a lot of the ideas for the plot of at least the beginning. I also want to thank anyone who has (or will) reviewed this stuff, because I love getting reviews and it really means a lot that people take the time to do it! Thank you! 

The Lost Girl 

Part 2

The soft knock on the door was what woke me - I shot up and realized that I had, indeed, fallen asleep on the couch. I got up shakily and made my way slowly over to the door. The floor was a bit tipsy, but much of the dizziness had gone, and I was able to make it across the room all right and opened the door to see a concerned looking Quatre looking at me. 

"Hi," he said softly. "Can I come in?" 

"Yeah, sure," I said, stepping aside to let him in. He walked in and sat down on the couch; I closed the door and walked slowly back into the living room. I didn't want to push it, even if I was feeling better. I sat on the couch next to him, and he turned to me, concern welling up in his eyes. 

"Are you all right?" he asked suddenly. "How are you feeling?" he reached up and placed a hand on my forehead before dropping it back to his lap. "You don't feel like you have a fever."

"I'm feeling better, I guess," I replied. "Still confused. I don't know where this is, and I know I should know who you are, who all of you are, but I I just can't remember." 

"It's all right," he said softly. "Don't let Wufei get to you, he just comes off as angry sometimes. He's really not a mean person."

I nodded slowly, and silence fell between us. 

"So where's Heero? Wasn't he staying too?" I asked slowly, trying to break the uncomfortable quiet that had filled the room. 

"He's talking to Relena," Quatre said. "Um, a friend of ours," he clarified, seeing the confusion on my face. 

"Oh." 

Silence. 

"Quatre?" 

"Yes?" 

Maybe it would be easier to ask someone else. 

"Um Duo um"

Nope. 

He cracked a small smile, his eyes glinting a bit. "You're together, if that's what you want to call it. But neither of you will really admit it. You're both too oh, I don't know. Maybe not too proud, but definitely too something to admit that." 

"Oh," I said. "It's just I can't remember a thing! It's so unnerving, and I feel bad, like I should remember" 

Quatre took my hands in his, turning to look me directly in the face. "Alison, listen. You're my best friend. And it's not your fault. It can't be, think about it. You'll get through this."

I smiled a bit then. "Thanks. You you're a really great friend, even if I can't remember it," I said, and suddenly I was enveloped in a warm hug. 

"Remember, soon," he whispered into my ear. 

He pulled back and smiled at me; I smiled back. He looked down and his features suddenly darkened. 

"Alison, what happened? Oh, did I hurt you?" he asked, indicating the welts running across my skin. 

"No," I shook my head. "They're just kind of numb, now. I don't know what happened I had this dream, and in it I was tied up but still it was just a dream." 

His eyes narrowed as he studied the red lines. "I don't know either. But you should be careful, for a while. Be on your guard. Just in case."

I nodded. "Yeah, guess so."

"Well, anyway, why don't you go take a hot shower? Relax, get dressed, and then I can fill you in, I guess," he said. 

"Sure," I said, and stood slowly. "A hot shower sounds really nice right about now, actually." 

"Good. I'll be here when you get back."

***

I walked out of the bathroom, feeling much better. The hot water had done me good, and the red marks that traversed my skin definitely didn't hurt quite as much anymore. I'd found some clean-smelling clothes in my room, and something about being clean and dressed made me feel much better. Granted, my memory hadn't kicked in yet, but I was much more hopeful than I had been even a half hour ago. 

I walked into the kitchen, where Quatre was at the stove, cooking what smelled like scrambled eggs. He turned around when he heard me come in, and smiled. 

"Hey, I figured you might want something to eat. And it's light, so it shouldn't bother your stomach too much. It looked like Duo was making some coffee, but it was cold so I made a fresher pot."

Wow. He was really awesome - so helpful, and very genuinely concerned. I felt terrible that I couldn't remember him, or anything about any of this. It seemed like I had something that wasn't too bad. Duo seemed really nice, too, and if we were something well, maybe that was cool too. I didn't know; I would just have to see. 

"Thank you," I said, sitting at the table, where there was already a steaming mug of coffee and a plate of plain toast. I took a piece and began to nibble a bit, my stomach seemingly all right with this development. 

Quatre finished cooking the eggs and separated them onto two plates, bringing them over to the table and setting one before me. He sat across from me, grabbing some toast and a mug of coffee before actually taking his seat. 

"Hope this makes you feel better," he said, picking up his fork. 

"Me too. Thank you, so much," I said, and began eating slowly. 

"Hey, what are best friends for?" he asked, taking a bite of toast. 

"Well, supposedly remembering each other, at least," I said. "I I really can't remember. Some things seem very familiar - it's like there's this tiny voice in the back of my head that's telling me what's going on, only I can't really hear it. The strangest things seem familiar."

"Like what?" he asked, looking up, his eyes questioning. 

"Well" I looked down. "It's stupid things, really. Like Duo's braid. Or the look Heero was giving me. I dunno." I shrugged, then looked back up. "Can you fill me in?"

Quatre sighed, but he was smiling. "Well, it's a little complicated. But I can try. And maybe Heero can help, when he gets back." 

I nodded. "So where is this? What are all of us doing here, and what's with these missions? How long have I known you? You know, stupid stuff like that."

Quatre nodded, then took another bite of toast. "Well for starters, we're in an old government complex just outside of Tokyo, on the docks. We've been operating out of here for about a year, ever since the skirmishes between Earth and the Colonies got bad. We were sent from the colonies - well, at least all of us pilots were. You were born here on Earth. You're our mechanic." 

"Mechanic?" I broke in. "Pilots? Dude, none of you - of us, I guess - can be much over nineteen, if that much."

"Well" Quatre trailed off, then shook his head slightly. "I suppose you know anyway, it's just strange telling all this classified information to anyone. We're mobile suit pilots, sent from the colonies to keep an eye on OZ. We're the best pilots and we pilot the best mobile suits in existence - nothing can beat us, at least not without a whole lot of effort. They're called Gundams. And you can fix them - faster than any of us, actually, except maybe Heero. You guys have a contest going, kind of a friendly rivalry." 

"Gundams." That sounded so familiar. Gundam pilots 

"Does any of this sound familiar?" he asked, hope edging his voice.

"A little," I said. "Maybe. But mechanic? I'm not gonna be much good to you for a while, I don't think." 

"Maybe then I can rack up some extra points." 

We looked up to see Heero leaning in the doorway - I was amazed, I hadn't heard him come in at all. 

"Morning," he said, coming over to the table and taking a seat, grabbing a piece of toast. 

"Hey," I said. "Impressive entrance." 

I thought I saw a hint of a smile play across his mouth. 

"What did Relena want?" Quatre asked. 

"Just wanted to update me on the colony situation. Seems it's getting worse, and OZ has commissioned a separate party to go out and look for us. We're going to have be careful, especially with this big mission." 

Quatre nodded, his eyes a bit darker than before. Heero shrugged, then turned to me. 

"So, anything yet?" he asked, taking another piece of toast from the plate, the first slice already gone. 

I shook my head. "Not really. Sorry." 

"S'not your fault," he said, and I could tell he really meant it. He seemed like he was trying to give off an 'I don't care' attitude, but something inside him was fiercely loyal.

"Thanks. Hopefully it'll come back soon," I said, sighing. "And thanks again for breakfast, Quatre."

"No problem," he smiled. "Glad to be of service. I just wish I could be more helpful in filling you in." 

"It's okay, I don't know how to jog a memory, anyway," I said, shaking my head a bit. 

"Do you think taking her down to see Zero and Sandrock would help?" Heero asked, leaning forward. 

"Maybe," Quatre mused.

Zero "Wing Zero?" I asked, the name popping out of nowhere, just rolling out of my mouth like it was natural. 

"Yes! Do you remember?" Quatre asked, eyes a bit wider, looking hopeful. 

I squinted. "Kind of not really maybe. It just kind of popped up in my mind."

"Well, that's good. It's there then, you just need to remember it all," Heero said. "You up to visiting the bay?"

"Sure," I said. "Maybe it will help."

He nodded and stood; Quatre and I did the same. I followed them out the door and down the hall - this really did look like a government complex, I noted - and into an elevator at the end. We went down a few floors, then emerged out into what looked like the bay of a warehouse - a *huge* warehouse. It was so large that I could barely see the other end of the room, and that was partly due to the two huge mobile suits lying prostrate on the floor just in front of us. 

"Here they are," Quatre said softly. "This one's mine, Sandrock. The other one is Heero's Wing Zero."

I nodded, trying to keep my mouth from falling open, just staring at the huge machines. 

I leaned back, looking up at Sandrock, when suddenly a sharp flash of pain shot through my head and I lost my balance, confused. 

"Alison!" I heard Quatre call, and someone caught me before I hit the floor. 

I looked up through suddenly blurry vision at Heero, who'd caught me in his strong grip and was looking down at me, concerned. Quatre had rushed over as well, and was also looking down at me with a very worried expression. 

"Are you all right?" Heero asked, helping me into a standing position but leaving his hands on my arms, gripping me in case I fell again. 

"I don't know. My head" I muttered, hands at my temples, trying to make the sharp pain go away. 

"We should get you back to your room and let you rest," Quatre said, and Heero nodded. He helped me back into the elevator and back down the hall to my room, where he steered me over to my room. 

"Get some rest," he said, looking at me, still concerned. "You look pale." 

"I will," I said. 

"I'll stay here for a while," Quatre offered. 

"Okay," I agreed softly. I was glad that I didn't have to mention how much better I would feel with someone else here. 

Heero nodded. "I'm going to go work on that equipment, then, since you're in no shape to do it," he said. "Hopefully you will be soon. See you later," he said, and was gone without a sound. 

I laid back in the bed, and before I knew what was going on Quatre had pulled the blanket up. 

'There," he smiled down at me. "Kawaii." 

I smiled back weakly. "Sorry to be so much trouble. Especially if you guys need me to do stuff for this mission" 

Quatre shook his head forcefully. "No, it's not your fault. Don't feel bad. I'll just stay in here and read, okay? You try and get some sleep." 

"Okay," I whispered, suddenly aware of how tired I really was.


	3. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Don't own Gundam. Too bad. ;)

The Lost Girl

Part 3

Voices. I heard voices as I approached consciousness, climbing out of the blackness and thoughtlessness and into sound. 

"Hey, what's this? How come she never lets me take care of her like this?" I could hear someone saying 

Duo. It was Duo.

There was a soft laugh. "Don't worry, I'm not trying to steal your girl." 

That was Quatre. 

"You'd better not be, Winner. I know where you live," I could hear Duo say, but it was jokingly and he was laughing a bit as he finished.

More laughter, then shuffling. 

"I'll get going then," Quatre said. "She's been sleeping most of the day - she almost collapsed in the bay when we took her down. But I think it might have jogged her memory a little. She remembered the Wing Zero." 

"Really? Good.," he said, but I could hear the concern behind his words. "I'll talk to her some more when she wakes up, see if I can't dredge anything else up. Thanks, Quatre." 

"Any time. She's my best friend, you know. You're both my friends. I'm glad you guys made it back safe. See you tomorrow." 

I heard a door shut somewhere far away, and more shuffling, like someone was sitting down beside me. 

I blinked my eyes open, now coherent enough to think about actually waking up. I saw Duo leaning over me; his braid fell beside my face, tickling my cheek,. 

"Hey," he said softly. "How're you feeling?"

"Eh. Okay, but I thought that this morning too," I replied. I struggled up, propping myself up on my elbows as he leaned back to let me sit up. 

"You started to remember, though?" he asked, hope coloring his voice. 

"A little, I think." 

"Like what?" 

I paused. Then something hit me, and I smiled tentatively. 

"Like this," I said, giving him a small smile as I reached over and gave his braid a light tug. "I remember I like pulling on this." 

His eyebrows rose as he eyed me, a grin beginning to form on his mouth. "Do you, now? Are you sure about that?" 

"Yeah," I nodded. "It was one of the first things that I think I remembered," I said, pulling it over and into my lap, playing with the end. "You've got some impressive hair, Maxwell." 

"Maxwell? You - you remember"

I blinked. I had remembered that. My smile grew. "I guess so... Some things are just kind of coming back -"

Suddenly he'd leaned over and enveloped me in a tight hug that I found myself returning. 

"Please come back to me, okay?" I heard him whisper, softly. 

I was struck silent for a moment by the tone of his voice - it had been pleading, almost. 

"I'll try," I whispered back finally. "I am trying." 

He pulled back. "I know. So be a good girl and keep at it, y'hear?"

I nodded slowly. He stood suddenly, and turned. "I'm gonna go take a shower, all right? Just call if you need me." 

"Sure." He was gone before I could blink. That was weird. 

I heard the shower running, and I just sat there, thinking about not much in particular. My head still hurt but this whole Duo thing was weird. Actually, this whole thing in general was weird. I was a mechanic, Quatre had said. But I couldn't really remember anything about being a mechanic. Or about the Gundams, really, other than the random things that popped up in my mind. Or about meeting any of them, or about my life

The water in the bathroom ceased, followed by shuffling. I continued to sit there, lost in thought but not really thinking at all. 

It was only when I heard a loud explosion outside that I was hurled back into reality. I blinked - that had sounded close. Very close. 

Duo ran into the room, eyes wide, hair messily-braided and dripping, wearing a blue tank top and black shorts. 

"Alison, are you all right? That didn't sound like it came from over here but - "

"I'm fine. What was that?" I asked, throwing the covers off and standing up shakily. At least I could manage on my own, although Duo was eyeing me dubiously. 

" I don't know," he said shortly, turning and jogging out of the room and down the hall. I followed to find him staring out the window in the living room, bathed by a red, flickering glow. 

"Shit. Someone's trying to blast their way in. Come on!" He turned and grabbed my wrist, heading for the door. First, however, he hit a button on the wall and a panel slid open, revealing two handguns. He took one and handed the other to me without a second thought. 

I stared at it for a second but was suddenly yanked behind Duo, who wasn't even looking at me, as he ran out the door and into the hall. It was dim in here; emergency lights lit the way every ten feet or so but they weren't very strong. I saw other people out here - Wufei and Heero. 

"Did they find us?" Duo asked loudly. 

"OZ," Heero said gravely. 

"They must have found us," Wufei added. 

Duo nodded. "Thought so. We've got to get outta here, now. What about Quatre and Trowa?"

"Already down in the bay," Heero answered, indicating the direction of the elevator, and we all headed for it. 

As we approached it another explosion rocked the complex, this time knocking Wufei, Duo, and me to the floor. Heero looked shaken but didn't lose his balance.

Duo scrambled up, reaching down to help me up as well. "You okay?" he asked quickly. 

"Yeah," I replied, using his hand to pull myself up. That had hurt, but it was nothing major. 

Wufei was already back on his feet and Heero had reached the elevator. He hit the button and the car arrived as the rest of us approached; we practically threw ourselves in and then we were going down, heading for the bay. 

"You guys are going to get your Gundams out of here, right?" I asked.

Wufei nodded. "That's the most important thing." 

"You're coming with me," Duo said quickly. "You can fit in the compartment behind the cockpit, okay? It'll be cramped but you're small."

"Okay," I said, looking down at the gun still in my hand.

The doors opened then and we ran out, Duo yanking me to the right as Heero ran straight and Wufei left. I looked up to see that there were now three more suits in the bay - I was amazed it was large enough to hold all of them. I could just see Quatre climbing up Sandrock, and Trowa was off in the distance heading for another suit. 

"Get out of here! Meet at Base 5 in two days!" Wufei called behind his shoulder as he ran. 

"Right!" Duo called back, dragging me on towards a huge grey and black Gundam outfitted with a very impressive-looking energy scythe. 

"Come on, this way!" he yelled, shoving me before him up the ladder that lay against Deathscythe's side. 

Wait - Deathscythe. This was Deathscythe. 

No time for that - I scrambled up the ladder and into the cockpit, Duo right behind me. He slammed a button on one of the sides and a panel slid open behind the pilot's seat. 

"In there," he said, pointing. I nodded and scrambled in; the panel slid shut and I was plunged into darkness. I sat against one of the walls - he had been right, this really wasn't a very big space, but I fit all right if I didn't stretch out too much. I pulled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them as I heard Duo buckle himself in and begin flipping switches. The machine beneath me began to hum just as yet another explosion rocked us, and now I thought I could hear gunfire. 

"Hang on!" Duo called, and then the suit was up and I could hear its weapons powering up. 

"Wohoo! Take that!" I heard Duo yell almost gleefully from the cockpit, as the suit itself now was rocked with intermittent explosions. "Here comes the god of death!" 

I was rocked violently as we were hit with something, and there was more gunfire and a loud explosion off in the distance. The suit hummed and whirred all around me as Duo fought his way out of the fray that I couldn't see, but could definitely hear.

There was a loose servo down here somewhere. I could hear that too. 

Wait.

I blinked. I listened, and the sound was obvious. Loose servo the motion joint behind the left leg. That had been giving me some trouble last time I tried to fix it. 

I could feel the grin spread across my face, along with a strange kind of shock that was slowly numbing my brain. I knew what was wrong - I could hear the loose servo, I could tell where it was and remember that I had been trying to fix it. This was so weird - I had no clue I knew these things, but suddenly things were popping up in my mind as if I'd always known them, as if they were so obvious and I had never forgotten. 

The suit lunged forward and I was slammed into the opposite side of the small compartment. Ow, that hurt - a lot. 

"Hey! Watch yer driving up there!" I called, rubbing my cheek, smiling just a bit. 

"Yeah, yeah, don't bother the god of death when he's working!" I heard Duo call back down. The playfulness of his voice came partly from his love of battle, I knew. 

I knew? 

I knew. 

This was so weird. I shook my head, wondering what else was floating around in there, what else was just beneath the surface, ready to emerge, pretending that it had never been gone. Despite the fact that I was extremely happy to be remembering things, something was also scary about the whole situation. There was something about suddenly knowing things that made me uneasy, and I couldn't push the feeling totally out of my mind. 

But at least I was remembering. 

That was my last thought before an explosion bigger than any of the others before it rocked the suit, and I was slammed to the ground and suddenly the world was gone - 

***

I was lying in a very uncomfortable position, I noticed, as I came to. The world was a bit unstable, but it wasn't too bad. And it was dark in here. And cramped. 

What was going on?

I was in Deathscythe. Behind the cockpit. There was an explosion - I must have been knocked out. But 

We weren't moving, I noticed. It was silent - completely silent. 

I shuddered, and sat up, rubbing my right temple. Man, that was probably going to bruise. But that wasn't my main concern at the moment. 

What was my main concern, however, was why we weren't moving, and whether or not Duo was all right. 

I sat there a moment, thinking. How was I supposed to get out of here? He'd opened the compartment from the cockpit, and I couldn't see much in here

Wait. The service panel. It was right back here - I knew that. I crawled over to the side, feeling along the wall for the edges of the panel. 

There it was. I smiled a bit, not even thinking about how I knew where this panel was, not even thinking about how I knew what I was now doing, which was re-crossing the circuits so that I could open this door from back here - 

WHOOSH

Bingo. 

"Duo?" I called softly, climbing gingerly into the cockpit. It was a bit difficult, considering the Gundam seemed to be lying somewhat on its stomach, so I was climbing downwards in the dark. Well, I thought, it wasn't completely dark - a few emergency panels were lit up, telling me things like Deathscythe's power was very low, and the motion servos in both legs and the left arm weren't working, and the right arm was stalled - 

"Duo?" I called again, looking at the pilot's seat - where else would he be?

There was a groan. "Ohhh can we go home now?" 

"Duo, you're all right!" I smiled, finding a way of sitting on the right arm of the seat, searching for his face in the darkness.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that," he said weakly. "I think my left arm's broken. Took a bad hit on that side. I can't move it, but it hurts like hell."

"Okay, just stay still. Let me get you out of there. What happened?" I asked as I began fumbling in the dark for the buckles that held him strapped him into the seat. 

"Never saw them coming," he said, his voice filled with self-resentment, as if he should have known better. I was pretty sure that was how he felt, but I also knew that it most likely hadn't been his fault. "Hit me with a shock missile, and hit the wall too. I think we're buried. They must have left us for dead, thought we were toasted. Stupid move, underestimating my Deathscythe," he said a bit smugly, patting the arm of his chair with his right arm. 

"Stop moving so I can get you out," I said, and a moment later the right buckle came loose, and he swung partway out of the chair. 

"Ow!" he muttered as his bad arm hit the strap still holding that side in. 

"Sorry! I'll get you out, hold on. Gotta get over there," I said, climbing down from the arm of the chair and crawling along the front panels of the cockpit, beneath his half-suspended body, to get to the other side. 

His braid, swinging freely, hit me in the face as I passed. 

"Hey, watch that thing," I laughed, pushing it out of the way. 

"It's not like I can control my hair. Despite popular belief, I'm not *that* talented, you know," he said, a bit of amusement coloring his words. 

"Yeah, well, it's still your property, so if you want it attached to your head at the end of the day you'll keep it out of my way," I said, smiling. 

"Oh, big threats from the little girl," he said mockingly.

I stopped and turned, suddenly aware that now my nose was just inches away from his. In the dim emergency light I thought I could see what could only be classified as an evil grin plastered on his pain-strained face. 

"Look, I could just leave you here." 

"You wouldn't do that." 

"Oh really? You sound so sure of yourself. What makes you think I wouldn't?"

"Because you love me too much to do that." 

I blinked, and suddenly silence slammed down between us. 

"Look, just hold still, okay," I said, a bit more weakly than I meant to, and shuffled as quickly as possible to the other side of the chair, away from his face, and began frantically working on the buckle there. 

I thought I heard a soft whisper in the darkness. "Damn." 

I worked on the buckle for another few minutes in continued silence. 

"Alison?" 

"Yeah?" I asked, reaching up to push a stray curl out of my face - this buckle had somehow gotten twisted, and was proving more stubborn than the other one. 

"I'm sorry, okay?" 

"Yeah I'm sorry, too," I said, a bit sheepishly. He had only been joking before, I knew. 

Right? 

That was the problem - somehow I just didn't know what was what anymore. Things were popping up, true, and that was scary enough, but it was what wasn't coming back to me that was scarier at the moment. 

Suddenly the buckle came loose and he crashed to the ground. 

"Sorry!" 

"It's okay," he said through clenched teeth. "We've got to get out of here." 

"Obviously. But how?" 

"Well, there's got to be a way we can climb out the back. There are really tight service shafts that run all through the suit."

I knew that too, didn't I... "Yeah." 

After much squirming around and quite a few "ouch!"es from Duo, we managed to get out the main shaft that ran from the cockpit down the right leg, and out behind the knee. 

Well, that had been the plan, anyway. The access panel that led out, however, was completely blocked by stone, which neither of us could move. 

"Damn. And we climbed all the way down here for nothing? There's got to be rubble all over the place, then. We'll never get out," Duo said a bit tiredly. 

"Well, we should at least get back to the cockpit then," I suggested. "It's a little less cramped." 

"Yeah," Duo sighed, then began the not very easy task of turning around in the tight space and crawling back up towards the center of the suit. We finally made it, both feeling cramped and stiff. 

"Well guess we're stuck in here, then," Duo said, sitting down on the main viewscreen, which was now beneath us in this position. 

"Yeah," I agreed, sitting down on one of the auxiliary panels. "Um you want me to look at your arm? Maybe I could splint it for you." 

He sighed, and I could tell it was hurting him a lot. "Sure, why not? It's not like I'm Heero Yuy and can just pop broken bones back into place No parts my -"

"Duo," I warned, but I could feel the grin creeping back across my face. I'd heard about Heero and his amazing methods of fixing his own injuries. 

I *had* heard about that 

No time for that, again. I crawled over until I was in front of him, and he stiffly offered his left arm as best he could. Even in the dim light I could see how contorted his face was with pain from even moving it that much, and I felt terrible, knowing how he was masking the pain from his voice, trying to keep it from me.

"All right, I'll try not to hurt you too much," I said softly, gently picking it up and feeling along it, seeing if I could tell where the break was. If it was a big enough break I should be able to feel it 

He winced, but said nothing. 

"There!" I said, stopping at his mid-forearm. I could feel where the bone had cracked and shifted - this shouldn't be too hard to splint, once I got it into place

"Okay I'm gonna have to put it back into place first. This is gonna hurt - a lot, probably," I said, a bit haltingly. 

"Okay," he said after a moment, and I could hear the determination in his voice. 

"All right now!" I held both parts of the bone, and quickly shoved them back together. 

"OW!" he yelled.

"Sorry. But that's done now," I said softly. I scanned the cockpit for something I could use as a splint I spotted a piece of the flight stick lying, broken off, on the floor, and quickly grabbed that. Now I just needed something to tie with 

Well my shirt was as good as anything. I reached down and tore a strip from the bottom, not letting the tear go too high I still had my dignity, after all. 

I noticed Duo's eyes widen just a bit as I finished tearing off the strip. 

"Can't wait to get your clothes off when you're around me, huh?" he asked softly, voice slightly halted and strained with pain. 

"Hush, you. You want your arm splinted or not?" 

He hushed. 

I quickly made a makeshift splint from the stick and cloth, and finished bandaging him up with a pat on the head. 

"There, that wasn't so bad, huh?" 

"No," he said softly. "Thanks."

"Anytime. And just remember, I let that remark slip because I know you're in pain and obviously it's clouding your judgement."

"Right," he said, voice still soft. 

I sat back down on the panel, and we sat there in silence for nearly five minutes, 

"So this is fun," I remarked. 

"Yeah," he agreed.

More silence. 

I had to ask him. It was driving me crazy - something at the back of my mind, still whispering at me, still tugging at me 

"Duo?" 

"Hmm?" 

"Um wellQuatre said he told me how we were um together, I guess." Well, that had been lame.

"He did, did he? What did he say?" he asked, not after at least a minute of silence, during which I was quite sure I wanted to die. 

"Well just that we were together, or something like that," I offered. "And that we were too proud, or something, to admit it." 

"Oh." 

More silence. 

"Duo?" 

"Yeah?" 

"I'm sorry." 

"For what?" 

"That that I can't remember. That well that if you I dunno. Nevermind," I said, looking down at my lap, despite the fact that he probably couldn't see me in the dim light anyway. 

"It's not your fault," he said softly. 

"I know. But I still feel like it is," I answered. 

"Well, it's not," he affirmed. 

"Yeah. I guess."

"Look, what does it take to convince you? It's not your fault, Alison, okay?" He sounded strained, slightly on edge. I hoped it was just the pain. 

"How did we meet? You know that and all the other stuff" I asked slowly."You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," I added quickly. 

"No it's okay," he said. "We met well, it was about six months ago, I guess. Right after Operation: Meteor started, a few months after I first arrived on Earth. All of us pilots had finally met and figured that it would be better if we worked together, and we'd just gotten the place down by the docks 

"You just kind of showed up one day - you'd followed Heero back here from school, and caught sight of the Wing Zero. He was gonna kill you, but Quatre stopped him."

"I'll bet that wasn't easy," I laughed. 

He chuckled a bit too. "No, it wasn't. But he did, and you wanted a poke at the suit, and so Quatre let you look over his, and you told him that his power relays were configured wrong Man, I'd walked in right before that, and none of us could believe you knew that just by listening to it run, we were so amazed So you just kind of stayed on as our resident mechanic, since we'd established the complex as a semi-permanent base. Funny thing is, you wouldn't tell us how you learned all those mechanics. And a mobile suit - a Gundam, especially - ain't no simple little circuit"

He paused a moment after that, and I wasn't sure if he was going to go on.

He did. "And then one day you were working on Deathscythe, trying to fix another power relay there, and I was in the cockpit"

*

"How's the power reading up there?" Alison called towards the torso, where Duo and the cockpit lay. 

"It's reading at 75%!" he called back, and she frowned. It should be better than that, even though the power supply hadn't been fully restored yet. She played with some wires, rechecking circuits and reconfiguring one of the relays. 

"It went up to 99%!"his voice called, and she smiled satisfactorily. Yes, that would do. She climbed up the rest of the way and hopped out onto the leg, then walked up towards the cockpit. 

As she approached she could see him, lying on his back in the pilot's chair, looking at the readouts before him as they lit up his face in red and blue. She was too busy watching his hands dance across the panel before him, calling up more power readouts, to notice when she hit the edge - 

And fell right on top of him. 

"Hey, being a little forward today, huh?" he asked, grinning as she pushed herself up with her arms, off of his chest. 

"Well, you're just so damn irresistible, Maxwell" she said, cracking a bit of a smile, trying to ignore the heat creeping into her face. 

"You know it," he smiled, laughing a bit as she struggled into a sitting position. 

"Yeah, I'm sure that's a big problem you have," she joked, looking down at him, seeing the evil grin positively plastered across his face. 

"Ohhh yeah," he drawled, "you know the girls just can't help flinging themselves at me."

She looked left, then right, then back down at him. "And just where, Duo Maxwell, are all these alleged girls? Forgive me if I'm mistaken, but I see absolutely none of them." 

He blinked, and she could've sworn she saw that smile waver for just an instant. 

"Really?" he asked. "'Cause I see one right in front of me. And she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen." 

She froze, the heat already creeping into her face quickening its pace as she could feel herself flush even more red. 

Actually, she thought she saw a tinge of red coloring his own cheeks, but she could just be imagining that... 

"Duo, you silly -"

"Shh," he said, grin diminishing to just a smile, but a very happy smile nonetheless. "I meant it." 

"Oh... well then, thank you." She smiled. 

"Welcome." And he just smiled back up at her. 

There was a silence, but it didn't seem to be an uncomfortable one. 

"Duo, look -" she began, but he cut her off. 

"Hey, I'm no good at this," he said. "But, well" 

She smiled. "So... are you just gonna sit there and grin at me, or are you gonna kiss me?"

It was a genuine Duo grin now. "Well, I can't disappoint my fans, now can I?"

*

"You know, for a long time I was really afraid... that you and Quatre... were... you know," he said softly into the darkness, after another minute-long pause, during which I could feel my face getting a bit hot. 

"Oh?" was all I could ask. 

"Yeah," he replied. "You know, I never asked you about it. Before. And I know you don't remember now. But you were - are - pretty close. I was always kinda jealous of that..." 

"Listen, Duo..." I began. What could I tell him? I didn't remember much before - things were coming back, but they all seemed unimportant in the light of this conversation - of this situation. Being here, with Duo... what good was I if I couldn't remember a thing that had transpired between us? 

"It's okay," he said, and he partly sounded like he believed that, even thought I didn't. "I'm just glad you're not dead, or anything like that." 

"Yeah, that would cramp a relationship, I guess," I said, and he chuckled a bit. "But still... I'm as good as dead to you like this. And I am sorry." 

"Really, Aly, it's okay. I know it's not your fault, like I said before. And besides," he said softly, "even if you never remember, I just get the chance to win you over all over again." 

I smiled at that, even though he probably couldn't see me. That really meant something, and especially in this state. That he would be so willing to start over from scratch, convince me - again, I guessed - that he... 

"Did you... Wait, nevermind," I cut myself off, afraid of what I had actually been about to say. That was silly. We weren't even out of our teens yet. 

"Did I what?" 

"Nothing." I sighed. "Honestly, this is getting too mushy for me, Maxwell," I said, and he laughed again. 

"Yeah, yeah, you're so touchy about that, ya know? Eh, not like I'm not either, I suppose. We need to time these things better."

"Sure. How's your arm?" 

"Still hurts. But not as much, thanks. Although I am really hungry." 

"Boys," I sighed, eliciting a small, mocking gasp from Duo's direction in the dim cockpit. 

"What?" 

"Nothing," I smiled. "Don't you have any provisions or anything?"

"You know... as a matter of fact... I do!" he exclaimed happily, and hopped out of his spot to shuffle over to the left panel, just behind the pilot's seat. 

As he did so, I thought I heard something - another shuffling, softer and farther away, but still there 

"Duo, wait! Do you hear that?" I asked, and he stopped moving, looking at me in the darkness, the light catching his eyes and making him look a bit eerie, actually. 

"What?" he asked. "I don't hear anything." 

"I thought I heard something. Shuffling. But nah, nevermind. It was too close anyway." 

"Huh? Do you think someone's trying to get in from the outside? Maybe they're moving some of the rubble," he said hopefully. 

"Maybe," I said, but I didn't really think it was that. I wasn't sure what I had heard, but it wasn't someone trying to get in. It had sounded strange, like whoever was making it was only half-here, half-real. But that was silly 

"Hey!" he called. "Anybody out there?! Get us out!" 

Nothing. 

"Hey!" he tried again, but again was met with only silence. 

"Sorry," I apologized. "I must have been imagining it. Wishful thinking. 

"It's okay. I'd rather shout at nothing than not say anything when someone was actually out there," he said. "Here's the food, anyway." He handed me a foil packet with his good arm, having come back over to the middle of the cramped cockpit. "And besides, if it was someone trying to dig us out, we're just going to have to wait."

"Yeah," I said. "Hey - is the radio in any state of possible salvation? Maybe we could rig it -"

"Nah," he said, taking a moment to rip his foil packet open with his teeth, being unable to use his left arm. "It's totally dead," he finished, spitting out a piece of packaging.

"You know, I could've opened that for you."

"No. Me big strong man. Cannot let little woman open food for me," was the reply.

"Duo!" I smacked him lightly, on the side of his head. "One of these days, I'm going to cut that braid off and hang you by it." 

"Never heard that one before," he said through a mouthful of food. 

"Yeah, well" I shook my head, then concentrated on opening my own food packet, pulling out the granola-like substance within and taking a bite. It actually didn't taste all that bad, I mused. 

We ate in silence, save the sound of each other munching granola. When the food was gone, Duo let out a long yawn.

"Well, I don't think anyone's going to rescue us right now," he said. "I haven't heard anything. You?"

"No," I said, although that sound still made me a little uneasy. I shivered a bit - had it just gotten cold in here, or had it been cold?

"You cold?" he asked, and I could see his concerned expression in the reddish light.

"Kinda," I admitted. 

He shook his head slightly. "That's 'cause you were all excited to get your shirt off earlier."

"Hey! Listen you - "

"Kidding! Just kidding!" he cried quickly, trying to redeem himself and failing miserably.

"Yeah, right whatever" I muttered, not so quick to forgive but smiling nonetheless.

"Well, I'd give you my shirt but I can't - you tied it to my arm when you splinted it." 

"Thoughtless me. next time I'm not going to even splint your arm, ungrateful" I muttered, laughing a bit. 

"Yeah, well Still, if you're cold we could I dunno. Huddle or something." 

"Huddle or something?" I looked at him with raised eyebrows, although somehow the idea was not all that unappealing and that kind of scared me. 

Okay, it scared me. A lot. And I couldn't really say why. But it did. 

"Yeah. Huddle," he insisted. 

"Yeah. Physics works and all that. Conserve body heat, huh?" I asked, trying to keep my voice even. 

"Right," he said. "Come on, look, you can punch me in the bad arm if I try anything." 

"Well" 

He gave me the big, sad manga eyes - which, I noticed, he was extremely good at, even here in the dimness, - and I sighed. 

"Fine. You don't know how disturbed I am that this isn't all that unappealing to me, you know," I finally gave in. 

"Wow. I think that was a compliment from the lady. Thank you." He grinned up at me. "Would you like to choose the spot?"

"Here's fine. On the floor, where it's least sloped. That way I can't roll over and crush that arm of yours that I worked so hard to fix," I said, pointing to a spot on the floor where the main viewscreen ended, that had now become "down" due to the Gundam's unusual position.

"Fine by me," he said, and I sighed and curled up on the ground. 

And then he was there, beside me, facing my back and lying on his right side so his bad arm was draped over me. 

And it felt kind of nice. 

Like I'd done this before. It was strange, and unnerving,. Then again, I wondered, what part of my life hadn't been strange and unnerving lately? Not much, I had to admit. 

I could feel him breathing shallowly on the back of my neck, and it tickled a bit. 

"Here, lift your head up a sec," he said, and I did so, confused. He slid his right arm out beside my neck so that I could rest my head on it, like a pillow. 

"Thanks," I whispered. 

His left hand ruffled my already unkempt curly hair briefly, stiffly. Probably painfully. 

That felt so familiar - was I going to go crazy like this?! With some boy who I didn't know liked me, had liked me 

Loved me? 

And there was something in the pit of my stomach, something afraid but still telling me this was how it had been, this was something that I was used to, something good for me 

"G'night, Aly," he whispered.

"Night, Duo." 

AN: All right, I know these parts have been coming out pretty quickly, and that's because I've been writing like crazy. What else is astronomy camp for, eh? ;) It's going a bit slower at the moment, though, and pretty soon I'm gonna catch up to my end point and it'll be a bit longer between posts. Just so you know. But not yet ;)

Also, as always many thanks to any reviewers, past, present, and future! I really, really appreciate it and if you genuinely like it, I'm a very happy little writer and it means a lot to me! J


	4. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Nope, still don't own Gundam. Not mine, I'm just borrowing it!

The Lost Girl

Part 3

Something was familiar. Eerily familiar, and I shivered. 

It was then that I realized that I was no longer curled up on the bottom of Deathscythe's cockpit, but stretched out on a cold metal something. And it was very uncomfortable. 

My eyes flew open, searching for where I was, what had happened. I was indeed strapped to a thin metal slab, my arms stretched above my head and held tightly in place by metal cuffs. It was bright in here, and the electric lights overhead buzzed loudly in my ears. I wasn't lying flat, but on a slight angle, and I was no longer wearing my jeans and ripped t-shirt but a tank top and shorts. And I was cold. 

"Duo?" I called, suddenly worried, looking around for any sign of him, but the place was deserted. My stomach churned - what had happened, and why wasn't he here? Who had done this to us, and why hadn't I woken up before now?

"Where's Duo?" I called up at the ceiling angrily, loudly. I was annoyed and cold and scared now, and I wanted to know what was going on. I wasn't going to take this any more. "Let me go!" 

"I'm afraid I can't do that, hon." 

I looked to the right as a cold, female voice - very similar to the one in my dream, I realized - cut through the air like a knife. 

There was a woman standing there, wearing an OZ uniform - how did I know that? - with brown hair pulled into a tight twist and glasses that focused her cold, harsh stare on me. 

She smiled, a smile that was nothing but evil and menacing and suddenly I didn't want her to look at me anymore. Something about her chilled me to the bone, and it was already pretty cold in here. I was afraid of her - truly afraid of what she was going to do, what she had done 

But I had to find out where Duo was, and if he was all right. I had to. 

"Where's Duo?" I demanded. 

"Duo? That braided baka. He's resting comfortably." She smiled that evil smile again, and wherever he was, I was sure Duo was anything but comfortable. 

"What do you want?" I spat. 

"Well, we wanted him, but you were an unexpected well, let me just say that you will indeed come in handy now, don't worry." 

That remark scared me, but I tried not to let her know that, just glared in her direction. 

"Listen, if you've hurt Duo - "

She laughed, a high-pitched laugh that wasn't true laughter, in my opinion. "Why would I want to hurt him? At least, not yet, anyway. We need to use him Just like we need to use you." At that last sentence her cold glare grew even colder, and her words were like ice slicing my skin. 

"Doctor! She's awake!" she called over her shoulder, and suddenly a door slid open in the grey metal wall and a man with dark black hair, a lab coat, and a set expression stepped into the room. 

"Lady," he bowed to her. 

"You may use her for whatever you like. I just need her alive. Our pilot needs some motivation, after all" The woman smiled icily, then turned on her heel and left the room, an air of coldness swirling about as she did so. 

I did not like this new prospect at all. I most certainly did not want to be held captive by OZ, and I most certainly did not want to be their guinea pig. I wanted to get Duo and get out of here. 

The doctor fixed his brown eyes on me, a small smile forming across his lips. He came over to the slab I was tied to and reached down, picking up a syringe from a tray beside me that I honestly hadn't even seen. 

"This won't hurt," he said, slipping the needle into my exposed forearm. "Not yet, at least." 

No. I didn't want to be here. 

"Let me go," I growled. 

"Not in the plan, girl," he said, removing the empty needle from my skin and walking over to a computer monitor. "We need to run some tests first. Like this one."

He his a button, and suddenly the pain - that same pain that I had felt when Quatre and Heero had first taken me down into the bay, a white-hot flash of a headache, making my sight cloud over and my ears buzz. 

"Unhh" I could hear myself mutter, somewhere far away, and I could just barely see the doctor nod and mutter something to himself. 

"Well, it seems that your internal communication link was malfunctioning. As I thought." 

What was he going on about? Couldn't think clearly 

"Let me" 

He ignored me, continuing to work at the console as the headache and pain continued to swirl around my head. It was getting unbearable, and I was at the point where I wished I would just pass out. But something inside me wouldn't. 

I had to get out of here. I had to find Duo. I needed the pain to stop. I had to - 

Heero Yuy - pilot of Wing Zero, Wing Gundam, real name unknown, blue eyes, brown hair, trained in sabotage and demolition - 

Duo Maxwell - pilot of Gundam Deathscythe, blue eyes, brown hair, trained in stealth operations and piloting techniques - 

Trowa Barton - pilot of Gundam Heavyarms, green eyes, brown hair, explosives and tactical expert, trained in analysis and command - 

Quatre Raberba Winner - pilot of Gundam Sandrock, green eyes, blond hair, trained in operational command and control - 

Chang Wufei - pilot of Shenlong Gundam, brown eyes, black hair, expert at hand-to-hand combat and close-range fighting - 

"Hey, don't let him scare you, it's just the way he is," the blond boy said as soon as Heero had holstered his gun, still staring at me with a look that was ready to kill. "I'm Quatre. What's your name?" 

"Fine, you can look at Heavyarms, but you don't touch it without my permission," Trowa said, pointing to his Gundam. 

"No one touches my Gundam but me," Heero said, piercing me with his crystal blue glare. 

"I don't like the idea of a *woman* messing around with my mobile suit," Wufei said icily, crossing his arms and pinning me with a cold glare.

"My name is Relena. It's a pleasure to meet you," she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder and smiling prettily, offering her hand.

"I envy you, being born here on Earth, growing up on the planet" Quatre sighed as we were bringing back a supply of parts from South America, flying over the rainforests in a hijacked carrier. 

"I didn't know you played the flute too," Trowa said as I picked his up, glinting silver in the sunlight; I had originally come to make sure he was feeling all right after a particularly close shave.

"I'll miss you," Duo said. 

"Hand me that double-6 wrench for this servo," Heero's muffled voice commanded from beneath the compartment he was working in, his orange-sneakered feet sticking out.

"You're not a bad mechanic," Wufei said shortly, the best compliment I'd ever gotten from him.

"Well you could, you know I have an extra room" Duo said, smiling a bit and looking and the floor, playing with the end of his braid absently. 

Another flash of white-hot pain shot through my head, and I think I screamed. It sounded like someone was screaming, far off, but I couldn't tell who it was. Maybe it was me. Maybe it wasn't. 

As suddenly as it had begun, the headache stopped. I blinked, my throat sore and my vision still a bit fuzzy, the room spinning just a little but not enough to make me sick. I was glad for that, considering I didn't think this doctor would unstrap me for anything, even to let me be sick. 

I lifted my head slowly, the bright light hurting my eyes. What had just happened? I felt so strange - like something had been activated inside my head, like a dam had been opened and suddenly it was all rushing back. Maybe not even all of it, but definitely more than ever before. 

Tactical information. Gundam design and blueprints. Heero's Wing Gundam could transform into an aircraft and had a deadly blast cannon, Deathscythe had an unmatched energy scythe along with a backup supply of blades. Heavyarms was no good once it ran out of bullets, so there was a backup flipout blade. Sandrock was a killer with its sickles, and Shenlong not only had a grappling hook but a flame-thrower system. 

Personal information. Quatre liked tea and Wufei could be a chauvinistic pig half the time. Trowa played the flute and Duo was a loudmouthed ass in battle. Heero was always trying to kill himself, or Relena. Quatre didn't like killing and Heero was the perfect soldier. Relena was a resolute pacifist and Wufei would rather work alone. Trowa was a circus clown - Quatre had told me, and Heero Yuy was only a codename. And Duo had let me braid his hair only once. 

It was so much information, all at once. So many memories flooding over me, it was so strange and confusing and scary. It took me at least five minutes before I could even form a very coherent thought separate from all the events and parts of my past that were washing over me. 

I looked up as I heard noise - the doctor was now fiddling with metal instruments on a tray near his console. I squinted - none of those looked very friendly, I thought, and my stomach churned uncomfortably. I saw a few syringes, two scalpels, and what looked like microchips on the tray, and he was holding up a laser scalpel, adjusting the output readings as I watched. 

No. Not friendly at all. And I had a very, very bad feeling that I was about to get to meet those instruments, up close and personal. 

I wanted out. The bonds held fast though, and I only succeeded in cutting my wrists against the metal as I struggled in vain. The doctor looked up and I saw a smile creep across his face as he saw a bit of blood from my cut wrist roll down the inside of my arm. 

"You're not getting out, dear," he said, bringing the tray over and sitting down on a stool beside the bed. He flipped on a light right over my head, momentarily blinding me. As I blinked in the bright light, I saw him lift up one of the syringes. 

"Now then, we're just going to fix you right up "

He jabbed the needle into my neck, and everything after that was pain and blackness.

***

"Have you made the adjustments?" 

"Yes, Lady." 

"Good. Unstrap her. She is awake." 

I opened my eyes to see the same cold-faced woman as before, and the doctor who had put me under. The doctor was standing next to the slab I was cuffed to, and he pressed a button on the side, releasing the cuffs. I slid clumsily to the floor, unable to hold myself up very well. I felt dizzy, and my head ached. If I had wanted to run away - which I did, vehemently - I was unable to, what with my head and aching limbs. I silently cursed myself for my current lack of mobility, wishing I could just run out of there. 

I had remembered. I had remembered everything, I suddenly realized. Before, when the doctor had shocked my body with that pain - I had remembered. For an instant, everything had come spilling back, washing over me, and I had remembered who I was. 

But it was gone now. Everything. Any memory of my life before the past few days had once again disappeared, trapped behind a door that I didn't have the key to. It was gone, everything. For a split second I had had myself back. I had had my life back. I had had my friends back - 

I had had Duo back.

But not anymore. 

I glared up at the woman with more hatred than I thought I had ever felt in my entire life, although I once again could not say that for sure, as my memories had disappeared from me once again. But it was her fault; somehow, I knew it had to be her fault. All her fault. 

I wanted to strangle her. I wanted to kill her for taking my life away, after giving it all back to me for an instant and then sweeping it under the rug and stamping on it, smiling smugly and laughing her little laugh at me. 

I wanted to kill her. But I couldn't.

I could barely move, barely stand. So I just glared at her, and silently swore to her that someday I would kill her for what she'd done. Maybe not today, but someday. Someday I would. 

"Bind her wrists," she commanded, and before I knew what had happened my wrists had been firmly cuffed behind my back. I hadn't even put up a struggle - yet another reason to curse my current pathetic state. 

"Where are you taking me?" I demanded, trying to muster some sense of threat and most likely failing miserably. 

"To see your little Gundam pilot," she said shortly, a bitter smile on her lips. She grabbed my arm in a viselike grip that I was sure would leave marks, and steered me out of the room. 

The floor was a bit unsteady beneath my feet, but I did my best to pay attention to the seemingly endless maze of halls she was leading me through. I might need to know this place later, and it was a good idea to pay attention. They all looked the same, however - each turn only brought more cold metal walls, low ceiling, grated floor. She was walking so quickly and purposefully that I could barely keep up with her and attempt to pay attention at the same time. I wasn't even sure if we were underground or on the surface. We could have been in space for all I could tell - there were absolutely no windows in this place. 

She finally halted in a dim hallway lined with grey metal doors that looked just like any of the doors in any of the hallways we had passed. I wondered if that was intentional - was it just cheaper to make everything exactly the same, or was it to confuse captives? No matter, I mused, since either way I was confused and lost. She hit a control pad on the side of the door and it *whooshed* open; she threw me in and the door shut seconds later. No chance for escape. 

I landed sprawled out on the cold metal grating of the floor, aching and freezing. It was pitch black in here and I couldn't see a thing. 

"Alison?" 

"Duo?" 

His voice had been tight and worried - it had come from one of the far corners of the room, but I still couldn't see a thing. 

There was shuffling, getting closer to me, and suddenly I was able to make out a form in the darkness. 

"Are you all right? What did they do to you?" he asked worriedly, now right in front of me, trying to look me over in the blackness of the cell. 

I didn't want to tell him. For some reason I didn't want him to know how scared and lost and empty I felt. It would only make things worse, and we didn't have the time to worry about things like that. We had to get out of here. 

But when I spoke, somehow the resoluteness of my mind didn't make it all the way down to my mouth.

"I don't know what they did," I replied, wrapping my arms around myself and shivering. "They did something, though. And I I remembered. Everything. But but now it's gone. They took it away - I can't remember anymore. I had it all back and now I lost it again"

There was a short silence, and I couldn't tell if he was angry or happy or - 

And then suddenly he'd wrapped his arms around me, hugging me tightly - albeit stiffly with his broken left arm - to him in the darkness. I noticed that he was wearing a tank top too, at least; I could feel his skin, just as cold as mine. And his splint was gone. 

"I lost it," I whispered into his shoulder, feeling my eyes begin to fill with tears and angrily willing them to stop. "I lost it I lost you "

"Does it look like I'm goin' anywhere to you?" His voice was light, but comforting beyond belief at the same time. Somehow he just made me feel better. Less scared. Like maybe I could get back what had been taken away. Again. 

"I'm sorry," he whispered, as he released me. 

"It's okay. I'll be okay," I told him softly. 

I was sure he wanted to protest, but he seemed to sense that I didn't really want to talk about it right now and silence descended upon us for a moment or so. 

"Hey - how's your arm?" I asked suddenly, worried that maybe they had done something to him, done something to keep him in pain, maybe, so he couldn't think. I knew they'd taken the splint off, but maybe they hadn't upset his healing break 

"It hurts," he said slowly. "They took the splint off but I think the bone's still in place." 

"Well, at least that's good" I trailed off. "I'm sorry." 

"Sorry for what?" he demanded. "It's not your fault - please tell me you at least believe that!"

"Oh, I know," I replied. "I just I don't like to see you in pain." 

There was a slight pause, but when he spoke the familiar grin had crept into his voice. "Well, that's good, then, since it's too dark to see me in here anyway." 

I laughed a bit, but I was still genuinely concerned. "Listen, we've got to get out of here," I whispered. "I don't want to stay here any longer than I have to. They did something to me, and I don't want them to do it to me again." 

"I know," he said softly, "but I've been in here for at least a day, I think, and I can't find a way out. No other panels of any kind. I honestly don't know how I haven't suffocated - I can't even find an air vent." 

I sighed. He had probably been captured before, and he probably knew how to escape. If I'd had my memory back, maybe I would have known. But if he thought it was hopeless 

"Hey, hey, kid, I'm not saying it's hopeless," he said quickly. "I'm just sayin' the great Shinigami hasn't thought of anything *yet*. I will." 

"I hope so," I said, shivering again. "I'm scared and cold and I definitely don't like it here. And I don't like people messing with my head." 

"Amen." 

AN: I'll try to keep churnin' these parts out, but no guarantees! 

Thanks again to all reviewers, and to the little chibi Heero who's trying to make my astronomy program work. ;)


	5. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. I just like to pretend I do. ;) 

The Lost Girl

Part 5

We sat there in the darkness for I don't know how long - maybe ten minutes. He'd grabbed my hand in his, squeezing it tightly, and we just sat there, waiting for something. We didn't have to wait long.

The door suddenly whooshed open and that woman was back, silhouetted in the doorway and looking even harsher in the bright light from the hallway as it assaulted my eyes. She had four guards with her, I saw, and I didn't like the look of them at all. 

Duo was up in a flash, and I struggled into a standing position as he stared at her with fierce eyes. When he spoke, his voice cut the air like a razor blade, as if he was trying to hurt her with his tones. 

"Whatever you did to us, you're going to pay for it, lady. Let us go. Now." 

She smiled and lifted her hand, pointing at us. Instantly two of the guards had locked their strong grips around my upper arms, and seeing as I couldn't struggle much because my body was still so unresponsive, I was trapped. Duo, on the other hand, was struggling with all his might, but he didn't seem to be gaining any ground for all his efforts. He looked so small, so thin in contrast with the huge guards holding him in place. His face was contorted in pain - one of them had grabbed his lower left arm, I realized, squeezing the broken bones. 

"Stop it!" I screamed, but received a backhanded slap across my face as a response. 

"You will bring them with me," the woman said, turning on her heel and walking crisply down the hall, her boots clicking and echoing down the corridor above the noise of struggling coming from us. The guards managed to propel us down the hall with what looked like very little effort, and I could tell they were enjoying their job far too much for my comfort. 

We were veritably dragged through countless halls again, until we finally stopped in a large room. It could see a blank viewscreen on the wall opposite the door, and a metal chair with restraints on it in front of the screen. There was another chair closer to the door, out of the line of sight of the main viewscreen. The woman motioned to the guards, and I was strapped into the chair near the door as Duo was dragged over to the chair by the screen and strapped in there, still struggling violently, but less so with his left side, I noticed. I winced - it must be hurting him a lot. 

The guards then retreated to posts by the door, pulling guns out and eyeing both Duo and me menacingly, as if daring us to try and escape. Duo was still struggling against his restraints as the woman walked over and stood in front of him. 

"What do you want?" he spat, and she fixed him with her cold gaze. 

"I want you to do something for me, Duo Maxwell." 

"Well, I ain't gonna do it, lady! So forget about it!" he said, glaring up at her from the metal chair. 

"Oh, I think you will, Mr. Maxwell," she said, smiling, and snapped her fingers. 

From a side door that I hadn't seen before, two men wearing lab coats stepped out, one coming over to my chair and one approaching Duo's. The one who stopped next to Duo's chair pulled a syringe out of his pocket, holding it up as it glinted in the overhead lights. 

"Do it," the woman commanded, and he flicked the cap off and plunged the

needle into Duo's arm.

"Stop it!" I screamed again, but immediately found myself gagged by the man

who'd just come over to my chair, tying a piece of cloth tightly across my mouth and preventing any further sound from escaping me. I glared at him as best I could, but I knew there was nothing I could do. Instead I turned back to Duo's chair, only to see that he was no longer struggling. He'd become slumped in his chair, looking up at the woman and man weakly, but even from here I could see the cold, deadly spark in his eyes. He was angry, and ready to kill.

But there was something else in his gaze - it looked a little off, a little fuzzy. Not quite focused. What had they given him?

"Now then, Mr. Maxwell. Let me explain to you what you are going to do for me,"

the woman began, each word she spoke deliberate and carefully enunciated. "You are going to contact your friends - the other four Gundam pilots - and you are going to say to them what I tell you to say. You are going to say that you managed to escape from OZ but cannot meet with them. You have managed to track down the party that is after you, and have contacted friends across the globe that will help you dispose of this OZ party. The only catch is that each of your friends must take his Gundam and go to a separate base. I will give you the names and locations of each base, as well as the officer they are to contact upon arrival."

"And...why am I gonna do this... for you?" he asked slowly, each word sounding like it caused him a great amount of effort to produce.

Suddenly I felt cold metal against my temple - I looked up to see the man who'd

gagged me, grinning and holding a gun to my head.

"Because, Duo Maxwell, if you don't do this for me, I'm going to kill her. And

then I'm going to kill you."

A tense silence filled the room, and I could see the internal struggle going on

behind Duo's fuzzy gaze. I wanted to scream at him - tell him I would rather die than hand over the other four Gundams, because even if I couldn't remember everything, I knew this was important. Bigger than me. And he knew that too. Didn't he?

"Fu..." he began.

The gun was shoved further into my temple, and the woman glared angrily down at

him.

"I *will* kill her, Maxwell. I know what she means to you. I know what your own

life means to you. Do you want her blood to be the last thing you see?"

More silence. It seemed to go on forever, and it shouldn't have. He should have told them to pull the trigger, end this now and keep the other pilots safe. Why wasn't he telling her to shove it and kill us?!

"...Fine..." he said. "I'll... do it. If... you let her... go."

*Duo!* I screamed mentally, wishing I could speak. Why was he agreeing?! He

couldn't! He just couldn't...

But he was drugged, and biased, and...

Part of me felt something... something for the fact that he wasn't willing to sacrifice me. But the rest of me wanted to make the man pull the trigger so that Duo would no longer have a reason to give in. So that he wouldn't have a weakness. 

This was all my fault 

"Good." The woman was smiling smugly as she motioned to the man beside her. He nodded and went over to a drawer, producing a black shirt that looked much like the one Duo had been wearing when we were captured. He undid the hand restraints - Duo's legs were still firmly locked into place, and he looked too drugged to even try to get out, although I could tell he desperately wanted to - I desperately wanted him to as well, but it was no use. The drugs running through his veins were too much for him, and he sat relatively still as the man pulled the black shirt over his head, only wincing as it slid over the broken arm.

"All right," the woman said once this was done. "I'm going to turn the controls over to you. One false move and she dies, and you'll only live long enough to see her life run out of her and onto the floor. You got that?"

"..Yes," Duo said angrily, the malice quite evident in his voice.

"Good. Now - send your message."

She and the man stepped back as a control panel flipped up on the right arm of Duo's chair. He angrily, but slowly - druggedly - typed in the correct information, and the screen before him hissed with static momentarily, before a slightly distorted image of Wufei appeared, glaring angrily at the screen.

"Maxwell! You baka - where are you?! Why aren't you here - we agreed to meet -"

"Listen, Wufei. I had... some trouble getting away. I'm... fine now."

Wufei's image scrutinized the boy in the chair. "You don't look fine. Where are you? Where's Alison? Why aren't you here?"

"I've got a plan," Duo continued, ignoring Wufei's questions, although each word looked like it was killing him. Slowly.

I knew they were.

"Plan?"

"The OZ party... the one after us. We can get rid of them. I've... got allies."

"Allies? What are you talking about?" Wufei was definitely suspicious now.

"Never mind the details. We can get rid of the OZ party."

Wufei's eyes narrowed. "And how do you propose we do this, Maxwell?"

"Bases - five different ones... all over the world. My allies need only one Gundam to help them... at each location. The Oz party has... spread out. We can strike at them from five different... points, get rid of them that way."

The image of Wufei seemed to be considering this as a valid plan. I wanted to scream out at him, tell him it was a trap and to get off the link now and come save us. But I couldn't, and it was killing me just as much as this lie was killing Duo.

"You want us to split up," Wufei said finally.

"Yes."

A beat. 

"I do not mind working on my own. I am sure the others will not either, as long as you promise your allies will assist us in getting rid of this OZ party. I am going to trust you, Maxwell, just this once. We will see."

I knew this was it - the point of no return. Wufei was just about to hand himself and the four other pilots over, right into OZ's hands. It was all over now. We were all dead.

"Where are the bases?"

The bottom of the screen flashed green, base locations and officers' names flashing across it for Duo to read off the Wufei.

"Heero is to go to.. San Francisco and look up Commander Thomas. Trowa needs

to take Heavyarms to Chile... to meet Commander Espinosa. Quatre goes to Hong Kong... meet with Commander Chen... You go to Sydney and find Officer Pierson. I will work from... Paris with my allies here."

"Very well," Wufei agreed. "We shall do so and meet these allies tomorrow. This had better work, Maxwell."

And with that, Wufei ended the transmission.

Duo closed his eyes for a second, knowing that with this, their fate was sealed. He knew what he had done, and I could tell that he wished very much that he hadn't.

"Very good, Mr. Maxwell. You are an excellent actor," the woman congratulated him, coming over to his chair.

"F**k you," he said. "Let... her go."

"Oh, by all means, Mr. Maxwell. There's no need for such language. Doctor?"

The butt of the gun suddenly cracked into my head, and I was gone.

***

"Duo!?" 

I woke with a start, blinking and sitting up. Where was I? What was going on? Where was Duo? 

I was alone, and it was silent here. Sunlight filtered in through the open door to.. 

My room? I was in my room, back at the military complex. What? 

Maybe it was all a dream - maybe I'd just had a fever and I'd fallen asleep and nothing had blown up and we hadn't been captured by OZ and the pilots weren't about to hand themselves unknowingly over to the enemy - 

"Duo?" I called again, my stomach twisting, hoping, praying, that he would come in and laugh at me for being so scared by a silly dream. 

Silence. He didn't come. 

I got out of the bed, aware that I was wearing pajamas - red flannel pants and a light blue shirt with 02 printed on it. I crept out of my room and stood in the hall, facing the closed door that led to Duo's room. 

"Duo?" I asked softly, knocking on the door. 

No answer. 

I opened the door, slowly, peering around it into the room. 

It was empty. My stomach fell as if I'd just fallen off a cliff - where was he? Was I still dreaming? Had I ever been? 

I remembered being captured by OZ. I remember being tortured, maybe I remembered getting my memories back. 

And losing them. 

And I remembered Duo making the call, I remembered the gun in my temple, the crack of the butt against my skull - 

I rushed into the bathroom, fumbling for the light switch - I didn't know where it was. The light clicked on and I stared into the mirror. 

A second later, I watched a single, hot tear trace its way down my cheek, totally of its own volition. 

There was a huge, blotchy bruise on my right temple, and a reddish needle mark on the side of my neck, just barely visible. 

It hadn't been a dream. 

They were going to be captured, and I didn't know what was going to happen to Duo. 

It was all over. 

I turned and marched out of the bathroom, unable to stare at my reflection any longer. It was just too painful; all I could see was Duo, over and over again, with his broken arm, face contorted by pain and drugs, closing his eyes, wishing that he hadn't just betrayed his friends. 

And it was all my fault. 

If I hadn't been there, he wouldn't have given in. He would have been dead for refusing to help - 

But what was to say he wasn't dead now? Now that his job was done, what possible reason did they have for keeping him alive? 

Why was *I* alive? 

I ended up in the kitchen, leaning on the table with both hands. I realized how hard it was to breathe, to balance. It was all crashing down. My friends were gone, and I couldn't even remember them well enough to keep them alive in my mind. I was a failure, a weakness 

NO. 

I had to do something. They had let me live, and they were going to regret it. I was not going to sit there and cry my life away, mourning for friends that I couldn't remember knowing for more than a few days. No. I wouldn't do it. 

I knew where they were. I remembered each base, as if it had been burned into my mind. Heero was in San Francisco. Trowa was in Chile. Quatre was in Hong Kong, and Wufei was in Sydney. 

But where was Duo? Where had they been keeping us? It could be anywhere, I knew, and that wasn't even limited to the Earth. He had been told to say he was in Paris, but something deep in the pit of my stomach told me we had not been in Paris. 

Maybe I could look there. But I had to get to the others first, muster some type of force and maybe get the information from the OZ guards at the bases. They would know, they had to be in on the plan. 

That's what I would do. 

I ran into my room and over to my dresser, frantically pulling clothes out and shoving them into the backpack that had been sitting beside my bed. I changed and brought the pack out into the kitchen, stuffing it with some food: a few apples, oranges, bread, cheese, and a bottle of water. I went over to the wall panel that Duo had opened the night we'd left, but it was empty. 

Damn. I would have to go in there. 

I would have to search his room. 

I walked slowly down the hall and into his room, flipping on the light and looking over the place where Duo had lived, before this entire mess. The bed was unmade, and a few black shirts took refuge the floor, strewn here and there. There was a pack of flimsies containing blueprints that I recognized as Deathscythe's sitting on the desk next to a picture frame. 

Oh God. I did not want to look at that picture. But somehow my eyes were glued to it, and I suddenly found myself in front of the desk, holding up the picture and looking into it like my life depended on it. 

Half of the frame was filled with a picture of me, and him, sitting on top of Deathscythe as it lay on the floor of the warehouse. I was grease-stained and holding a wrench, smiling but looking a little surprised. He had his arm around me and was grinning like the devil.

Stuck into the frame beside it, filling the other half was the two of us sitting together on a park bench, sandwiched between a sweetly smiling Quatre and a slyly-smiling Trowa. Heero and Wufei were standing off to the side beneath a tree, arms crossed and looking uninterested. I was giving Duo bunny ears, and he didn't seem to notice. 

I put the frame down, and opened the top desk drawer. 

There it was. I pulled out the gun and checked the clip. It was full; I searched the drawer and found two extra clips, and grabbed those as well, shoving the gun into my belt and the clips into my pocket. 

I left his room, shutting the door behind me and walking back to the kitchen to grab my bag. 

Then I walked out the door, down the hall, and took the elevator to the warehouse, walking through it as quickly as possible, across the bare concrete floor, trying my hardest to stare at my feet and pretend that it wasn't empty. I also ignored the massive cave-in at the far side, where sunlight was streaming through to paint the floor gold. I opened the door out into the sun, and made my way up the docks, and to the street. 

I hailed the first cab I saw, and told the driver to take me to the airport. 

"Where're ya goin', honey?" the cabbie asked me, flipping his green-eyed gaze up to the rear-view mirror for a split second. 

Green eyes. 

Trowa had green eyes. 

Quatre had green eyes. 

"Honey?" 

"Oh." I snapped back into reality, blinking. "What?" 

"Where're you flyin' to?"

"San Francisco. I have a friend I need to see."

AN: Thanks for the continued feedback, and an extra-special thanks (and some of Quatre's just-cooked makies) to someone out there who knows who she is! :) coughDuofanaticcough 


	6. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam, wish I did, but I don't, oh well 

The Lost Girl

Part 6

*How was I going to do this?! * my mind screamed at me constantly as I lay on my stomach just hidden behind the top of a hill overlooking the OZ compound. I had gotten to San Francisco with relatively little trouble, flying into the city and immediately heading to the streets for information. 

That had not been easy - there were very few ways to find out where an OZ base was from someone who was not going to immediately report to their superior that some kid was asking questions. I'd searched the bars and finally found someone drunk enough - or maybe just stupid enough - to explain to me his theory about the warehouse down by the bay. And how he thought it was an OZ base. 

That was all I'd had to go on, and upon arriving near the water I'd realized that he was right. I couldn't remember ever having known anything about OZ bases, but something about this place told me that this was it. It just didn't feel abandoned - it felt like someone *wanted* it to feel abandoned. 

That, and there was the mobile suit squad that I had seen leaving the area ten minutes earlier. 

But my original dilemma remained - I didn't know how to sneak into an OZ base without getting my head blown off. In fact, I didn't know how to walk into one without getting my head blown off. 

What the hell was I going to do? 

I fingered the gun in my belt again, reminding myself it was still there. But it didn't give me much comfort - I couldn't shoot it because I didn't ever remember having shot one before, even if I had. That and the fact that one lousy handgun was not really going to be much good to me if I had to face down a mobile suit. I would be dead, and I knew that. 

But I had to find Heero, and I had to get him out of there so we could get to the rest of the pilots and get to Duo. 

Duo. 

No, I couldn't think about him now - the others were in just as much trouble, and I had to get at least one of them out before I could even begin to think about getting to Duo. 

I had to. 

I took a deep breath, and headed over the hill. The base didn't seem to be all that occupied, but I was sure that was an illusion. They would've had to take down a Gundam. 

Or maybe not. Not if Heero had believed them to be allies. But would he have? I knew he was the "perfect soldier" - that piece of a memory had come back to me - and maybe he wouldn't have given in 

There seemed to be no signs of a fight, I noticed, as I approached the barbed-wire fence surrounding the area. Maybe he hadn't come. 

There didn't appear to be any guards around, either. 

My stomach twisting, I caught sight of a spot in the fence that I was small enough to crawl through. Still no sign of guards. I took off for the spot at a dead run, crawling through it so quickly that I grazed my arm and could feel the blood begin to drip down it as I stood, head whipping back and forth, searching for someone - anyone - who'd heard or saw me. 

Nothing. 

This was almost too easy, I realized, as I approached the main building, hugging the shadows. It was eerily silent, and there wasn't even a tower out here. How were they supposed to guard their base? OZ couldn't possibly be that stupid. 

I didn't like this, but I had come this far and I wasn't about to turn back because of possibly the best luck in the world. I found a door in the side of the building - an old door with a key lock, and no entry keypad beside it. 

Could I possibly be *this* lucky? 

I closed my eyes, counted to three, and opened them. I pulled down on the handle. 

And the door swung open. 

I was inside in a flash, closing it silently behind me. It was dim in here, all metal, looking very much like the place I'd been held in. There were no guards. 

I just had to find Heero before they found me. 

I began left down the hall, wondering how in the world I was going to find Heero. And how in the world I hadn't run into any guards. 

Wait - there was noise from down the hall. I frantically searched for somewhere to hide - anywhere 

That vent. There was an air vent of some type close to the ground on my right - I pulled at the grating, and to my immense relief it came off easily in my hands. I threw myself into the duct and pulled the grating back on as quietly as possible, sitting there not daring to do much more than breathe.

A moment later two pairs of OZ uniform boots clanked by in the hallway. 

Pieces of their conversation drifted down to me as I sat there in the darkness. 

" prisoner sure put up a fight once he found out "

"Yeah, good thing they're holding him in maximum security makes me feel better he's on the lower level" 

Lower level. I had to get down there. 

I turned around in the vent, looking down the shaft. It went straight out, and then hit a junction just at the limit of my vision. I couldn't see anything much beyond that, and the light filtering from the hall through the vent didn't shed any light beyond there. 

I cursed myself for not bringing a flashlight, but began crawling as quietly as I could down the air shaft. I stopped at the edge of the light, letting my eyes adjust to the darkness before going on. 

Just as I came to the edge of the junction, I heard a noise - a very soft noise, just below me. 

Someone else was in these air vents, I realized, and my blood froze. Was it someone looking for me? Did they know I was in here? 

Was it Heero? 

I sat there, peering over the edge, trying to see where the noise was coming from. It was barely audible, and I couldn't really tell if it was getting closer or not. 

Suddenly I was face to face with Heero Yuy, and it took all the control I had in my body not to jump and scream.

That would have been bad. 

His face remained impassive as if he had expected me to be in there, waiting for him. 

He pointed behind me, back the way I'd come. 

"Out." 

I turned around and headed for the grate - I could hear him behind me, making the same soft noise, just barely audible, otherwise perfectly undetectable 

He really was the perfect soldier. Why had I bothered coming in to rescue him - I probably could have waited outside for him to come find me, 

We reached the grate and paused; I didn't hear anything, and I turned to see his face. He nodded his approval, face still impassive if not determined. I removed the grate and we crawled out; he replaced it and I pointed down the hall. 

We didn't stop running until we'd made it back to the hill. I turned and looked up at him, and froze.

"What the hell was that?!" he yelled down at me, face now twisted in anger, eyes flaring blue and I thought I would die under that gaze 

"That f**king traitor. And why are you here?!" 

"He's not a traitor!" I yelled up into his face, my arms spread wide in exasperation now. I could feel the tears trying to well up in my eyes, but I was not going to cry in front of him now. "He was drugged and in pain and they were going to kill me or him or someone if he didn't send that message!" 

"Then he should have died," Heero said coldly, softly, still looking down at me with that piercing blue gaze - one so different from the one he'd fixed on me that first morning that I wasn't sure if this was even the same person. 

"He would have! I know he would have rather died!" I screamed at him; the world was getting fuzzy around the edges, distorted through the tears that I was not going to cry. 

"Then why didn't he?" 

"They they were going to kill me" I said through the tears that were now falling, silently, chilling my face as their trails coated my cheeks. "Then they were going to kill him. He's he's probably already dead. I I would have rather died" 

Heero blinked, but his expression did not change, and neither did his gaze.

I swallowed, blinking, trying to make the silent tears stop. 

"But he's your friend," I whispered. "He was forced to send that message, and now he's in trouble. We need to save everyone, and we need to save him."

"No, we don't."

"Fine," I said, cold fire burning my voice, staring up at his face. I could feel our glares lock and clash, but I wasn't about to back down now. 

"I need to save him," I said softly, the tears finally slowing to a stop. "This is my fault, and if you want to kill me after all of this then I'm going to be the first one to beg you to do it. He gave in because they were going to kill me if he didn't, and I'm not worth all of you. I know that. But he gave in." 

He was silent, looking at me. 

"Will you help me? Please?"

"I need to get my Gundam back. Then we can talk." 

I practically melted with relief. "Oh, Heero thank you. Thank you." 

He turned back towards the base, and I knew it was better to let him go alone. I would be in the way - he knew what he was doing. 

Then I thought of something. "Heero! Wait!" 

He stopped and turned. I pulled the gun out, tossing first it and then the two clips to him. He caught them all perfectly as they arced toward him through the air. 

Then he turned and was gone over the hill.

***

I sat there, waiting for him, staring up at the clear night sky as the starts twinkled into existence. I knew the names of the constellations - could name Orion, and Pegasus, and Cygnus. 

So why couldn't I remember my past? The knowledge that it was all somewhere, hiding from me, had plagued me since I'd first woken up, first seen that braided boy who'd given me the water and sat me down, asking me if I was all right. I had friends, I was told; I was a mechanic and they were pilots. I had a relationship, or at least what could be loosely termed as one. 

Why couldn't I remember it? The ghosts of the knowledge that had inhabited my mind for the briefest instant when I'd been shocked back at that base kept whispering at me, haunting my mind with dim recollections of things I had once known. Things I didn't even know I knew. 

I didn't know if I knew how to fire a gun, or even where the light switch had been in my own bathroom. Well - it was Duo's bathroom, really, but I had a feeling it had been my own as well for some months. 

Duo. 

No. I shook my head, as if that would clear his name from the forefront of my mind, make the image of his face contorted in pain disappear from behind my eyelids each time I blinked. It didn't work, just as I knew it wouldn't. 

And where was Heero? I checked my watch - he'd been gone for half an hour, and there had been neither a sign of him nor any sound whatsoever from the building. Was he all right? Had he gotten captured again? Wouldn't he have at least fired his gun if there had been a fight? 

I didn't like waiting. I wanted him to come back, and I wanted him to help me find Duo. I wanted him to help me free the others, to help me right this wrong that had happened all because of me. Because there was no doubt in my mind that this was all my fault, and I was the one who had to fix it. But I did need help, and I needed Heero to come back so we could get out of here. 

BOOM!

There was a violent explosion, and I was knocked on my back. I blinked, staring up at the sky for a moment, trying to grasp what had just happened. 

Gunfire - I could hear gunfire now. 

Heero. 

I leapt up, scanning the area for the source of the explosion, for Heero's Wing Zero, for anything. The western side of the building - the farthest side form me - was lit with an orange glow. That must be where that explosion came from. 

So where was Heero?   
The gunfire continued, getting closer. I didn't know what to do - if I should run, or stay here until Heero showed up. *Would* Heero show up, my mind screamed at me over the din. He hated me now, and he hated Duo now. We were the reason he'd been captured. We -

"ALISON!" 

I turned, startled, to see the Wing Zero standing behind me. I shuddered involuntarily, standing at the feet of the huge machine that I hadn't even heard coming. 

The gunfire was getting closer.

The front panel leading to the cockpit opened just as the suit reached down and swept me off my feet into its hand. I blinked, dazed, rising fast until I was level with the cockpit. Heero stared at me from his seat, cold blue gaze just as harsh as it had been half an hour ago when he'd left to retrieve his suit. 

"In," he said shortly, dumping me into the cockpit, the panel sliding shut behind me seconds later. Immediately the suit rose off the air, and took off into the night; I was still sprawled at his feet, but he took no notice of me, face hard as stone as he watched the radar. 

"They're following us. How do they know where I'm going?" he muttered angrily to himself, then executed a maneuver that I couldn't follow, but that definitely made me want to lose my lunch. 

With some effort, I managed not to get sick in Heero's cockpit. I was pretty sure he wouldn't have taken that too kindly. 

"They're *still* following me," he growled as the miles sped by on his screen, which I could just read from my position on the floor. "How are they - *you*!" he yelled, staring down at me with a look that, if it wasn't meant to kill, it was definitely meant to maim for life. 

"What?!" I asked desperately, gazing up at him, hoping he wasn't about to kill me, because it sure looked that way.

"They're tracking you!" he yelled, and I froze. 

The doctor. What had he done? Had he put a tracking device 

"You" he muttered, but a nearby explosion rocked the suit, and a panel began beeping and flashing red. 

I craned my neck - it was the servo connecting the right leg to the rest of the suit. He wouldn't be able to fight on land now - we'd have to stay in the air. 

Well, he'd have to stay in the air. At this moment I did not completely disbelieve that he would very likely just jettison me and let me fall to my death. 

"Shit. I'm just gonna have to get rid of them," he growled, and the suit's flight suddenly halted and I was slammed into a side panel as he whipped the suit around. 

"OW!" I yelled, not meaning to, but I had hit that bruise, and I could feel my eyes stinging. 

If he even heard me, he made no indication that he had. He began warming up his cannon, and after ten minutes of hanging in the same spot in the sky, the gunfire and explosions had stopped, and his radar was no longer beeping. 

The suit descended so rapidly that I felt like I was falling, and probably would've hit the top of the cockpit if I hadn't grabbed onto one of the chair supports. We landed with a thud and the cockpit hatch slid open. 

And Heero kicked me out. 

I vaguely remember falling, and even more vaguely remember hitting the ground. It was cold, and damp, and covered in grass that tickled the side of my face, although I couldn't get up. I could barely feel any part of my body, except to tell that everything hurt. A lot. I managed to somehow roll on my back just in time to see Heero hop gracefully out of the cockpit and land on his feet before me, pointing the very gun I had tossed him at my head. 

His eyes were inhuman, and I was going to die. 

"You. Traitor. You and Maxwell both. I'm going to kill you." 

"" I managed to get out, coughing violently as I did so, and part of the world went black for a second. 

When my vision returned he was kneeling beside me, the muzzle of the gun pressed firmly against my heart. 

Right in the middle of my chest, where my heart really was. He was no fool - not in the head, not to die that quickly, but straight into the heart so I had at least a minute more of consciousness as the cold lead stopped the muscle from pumping. 

"Traitor," he spat again, and I would've given anything to escape that gaze, that voice. 

"I'm not" 

"How else did they follow me unless they were tracking you? How'd you get in there so easily in the first place? It was crawling with guards when I went in. Why'd Maxwell tell me to go there in the first place? Traitor," he repeated. 

"He was drugged!" I cried as loudly as I could, mustering what strength I could. If this was going to be my last breath, I was going to make it count. "I saw them do it! They operated on me and then they drugged him and said they would kill me and then him if he didn't send that message!"

I stopped, panting, but the expression in his eyes didn't change a bit. 

"I'm not a traitor," I said, more softly this time, barely a whisper but I knew he could hear me. "And neither is Duo. He he wouldn't let them kill me, Heero. I wanted them to. So he wouldn't give in. But he wouldn't let them Heero, please.

"Listen to me," I panted. "Heero, listen. Duo is no traitor. Kill me, I'm the reason you got caught. He's not. He's *not*. I'm sorry." 

The gun was pressing into my chest so hard that I could barely breathe; I could barely feel anything anyway, not even the pain seemed so bad now.. 

All I could feel was Heero's icy glare, pinning me down more firmly than the gun, killing me slowly from the inside out 

"I'm going to take you to Relena," he said softly, in a monotone that very nearly convinced me, if nothing had before, that he just wasn't human, "and you're going to speak with her. Then I'm going to speak with her. If she believes you, I might not kill you."

The force of the gun was gone. He grabbed me and slung me over his shoulder, walking quickly back over to his Gundam and grabbing the rope that he'd thrown down from the cockpit.

I was very numb at this point - there was a kind of dull pain radiating from my body, but nothing more than that. I was as good as a rag doll, draped over his shoulder as he climbed hand over hand back up into the cockpit; we swayed slightly from side to side, but he just kept climbing and I watched the ground grow farther and farther away as we swung up to the open compartment.

I had to admit, somewhere in my clouded mind, I was impressed beyond belief. At

least, the part that wasn't scared to death was impressed.

He reached the cockpit and slid me off his shoulder onto the floor of the small space so that I had a rather good view of absolutely nothing but his orange sneakers as he sat down, sliding the outside panel closed and activating the Wing Zero's flight systems. We lifted off the ground, and he set us on our way.

AN: Parts may be coming out more slowly soon Seeing as I have to share Duo with a certain someone so I can't have him all the time to write about That, and I have to go do my laundry tonight! ;O


	7. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam. I never did. I just liked to pretend I did. ;)

The Lost Girl

Part 7

The flight to wherever Relena was was long, painful, and boring. Something in me wouldn't let me sleep, or even pass out, even though each breath I took stung and the place where he'd shoved the gun into my sternum ached ferociously. I was still numb with pain, and extremely sick of Heero's shoes, when we landed with a thud.

Wordlessly, Heero opened the cockpit and threw the rope down, slinging me over

his shoulder without a thought, as if I were a sack of potatoes or something like that, which people were always slinging over their shoulders and never thinking about. Not like a person. Not like a friend.

I watched the ground now grow closer as he slid noiselessly down the rope, landing deftly on his feet on the soft earth. I couldn't see anything but the barely-depressed earth he left behind as he carried me... somewhere.

He walked up a concrete path, and up some steps. Then he swung open a heavy wooden door - he must have had a key or something - and stepped into a marble-tiled hall, shutting the door behind him without a word.

He carried me some ways, during which I lost track of where we were going,

watching the soft white carpeting go by beneath his feet. The whole time he never made a sound, until he pushed open another door.

"Relena."

"Ohmi- Heero?! How did you get in here? What are you - is that Alison?" I heard a soft female voice shriek, and there was running. Suddenly I saw another pair of feet, wearing white tennis shoes, and then a girl's face became visible as she crouched down to peer up at me.

"Heero, for God's sake, put her down. On the couch, over there. What happened?" she demanded, and he soundlessly flipped me off his shoulder and onto a red velvet couch. It was so soft against my battered, numb body...

The ceiling was a high vaulted one, and I could just see a chandelier from the corner of my eye. The girl's face reappeared in my vision as she looked down at me, eyes clear blue narrowed in concern. She had light brown hair, almost a golden color, and two thin braids snaked around the sides while the rest fell to the sides of her face, probably a little longer than shoulder-length.

She gazed down at me, looking me over, as I just lay there, unable to speak still, my breath still agony to draw each time.

"Heero. What happened?"

Heero was standing off to the side, his arms crossed over his chest. I could see his hard features over her shoulders, blue eyes still glittering with bloodlust. I knew he still wanted to kill me - I knew he didn't want to give me this chance. He said nothing.

Relena - this must be Relena, I had finally reasoned - sighed aggrivatedly and stood, whirling around to face Heero, her tan skirt twirling about her legs as she did so. She put her hands on her hips and stared up at him.

"Heero Yuy, this is no time to be stupid. She's hurt - now either tell me what happened or I'm going to call the police *along* with the paramedics."

"She doesn't need paramedics. She'll be fine," he said in the monotone that he'd adopted since I first saw him in that air duct in the OZ base.

"What do you mean, 'she doesn't need paramedics'?! You baka - she can barely breathe, and she's got a nasty bruise on her head. It looks like she just jumped off a building - she's probably got broken ribs! I don't even know if she can hear us anymore - "

"I... c'n... hear..." I managed to wheeze out - to convince her, if not myself, that I was still alive.

Relena whipped back around to face me. "Shh," she commanded, "don't talk. I'll take care of you, since Mr. Yuy here had at *least* the sense to -"

"You will not take care of her, Relena."

"What?!" she demanded, facing him once more. "What are you talking about? Why

else would you break into my house to bring her here, if you didn't want me to help her?"

Oh. So he'd broken in, had he? Somehow that didn't surprise me in the least.

"Because you're going to listen to her. Then you're going to listen to me. And then I'll decide if I'm going to kill her."

When Relena spoke, her voice was as sharp as a dagger. "Heero Yuy, you will *not* kill anyone in my home. Is that clear?"

He blinked once, slowly. "Yes."

"And she is going to rest before I listen to her. She can barely speak now. You're going to get her some blankets and I'll have some food made for her, and she's going to rest. Then I'll listen to her, and ignore you."

Heero just stood there, his features still unchanging. I could tell he probably regretted bringing me here instead of killing me when he had the chance. It was going to take more work for him to kill me now.

"Now go - I'm sure you're smart enough to find a blanket in my house. Go!" She shooed him off; he left, looking still rather angry and I was suddenly sure I wouldn't want him running around my house like that. But Relena seemed quite sure that he would return, and that all occupants of the house would still be alive when he did so.

She turned back to me, her gaze softening. "What a baka, huh, Alison?" she asked softly. "I'll be right back with something for you to eat once you feel up to it."

I managed a miniscule nod, and then she was gone. I just lay there, unable to really move, trying to focus on breathing in and out, wishing the pain that stabbed me from all directions would just stop and go away.

I heard the door open a little later, and Relena returned carrying a steaming bowl and a loaf of bread on a tray, along with a glass of water. She came over to the couch and set the tray down on a coffee table nearby, pulling a chair over so that she was beside my head.

"Where is that boy?" she muttered absently, rolling her eyes a bit. Then she felt my forehead, frowning.

"You feel a little warm - you might have a touch of fever."

Oh great - just what I needed. A fever on top of a death warrant.

Suddenly Heero was standing behind Relena again - how on earth did he *do* that?! - holding a thick, blue blanket and looking rather miffed about the whole situation. Well, I mused, miffed was better than bloodthirsty any day.

He handed the blanket stiffly over, and Relena sighed and draped it over me. It was warm, and I realized that I had been pretty cold. Now, though, I was someplace soft and warm and I didn't ever want to get up...

"...Thanks..." I managed to mumble, and she smiled.

"You're welcome." She turned back to Heero, who was still standing stiffly behind her. "Now, Heero, what is this about?"

"She's a traitor," he spat, voice cold. "She and Maxwell both."

Relena blinked. "Heero - "

"Listen - our base gets attacked; we all managed to escape. Except for her and Duo. Two days later, Wufei gets a call from Duo. He says he has allies that will help us get rid of the OZ party that attacked us if we split up, one pilot to each base. When I get there, it's a trap. Tell me he's not a traitor." He looked at me. "Tell me she's not." 

"We're *not*!" I yelled as loudly as I could, struggling for some feeling in my arms, struggling to sit up at all. I couldn't really, but somehow I managed to lift myself up just a bit on my elbows. 

"We were captured, and they did something to me," I said slowly, taking a deep breath as I spoke each sentence, even though it hurt like hell. "They operated on me, or something. Then they made Duo they drugged him they said they would kill me then him, if he didn't send that message. I I wanted him to hold out He didn't, and they sent me back here"

"With a tracking device on you! You got into that base with no trouble at all - it took all I had to get back in and get my suit!"

"Quiet, both of you!" Relena demanded, and amazingly enough, Heero fell silent, content to look daggers at me instead. I chose to look up at Relena, who was looking rather furious herself at the moment. 

"Heero Yuy, you listen to me. How many times has Duo saved your life? How many times has Alison fixed your suit for you? They're not traitors. She said they were tortured, or drugged, and - "

"He should have died. She should have died."

"No, they shouldn't have!" Relena protested before I could say a thing. "Listen, Heero, this isn't about a lack of loyalty. It's about the complete presence of it. Now you go and take a cold shower and let her sleep and if she's not here in the morning - if I find out you've killed her or hurt her in any way - I'm going to come after you myself. With Treize Kushranada at my back, if I have to." 

Heero looked almost shocked - well, maybe not almost. Almost *almost* shocked. At any rate, there was silence for a moment before he spoke.

"She's got a tracking device. They'll find us here. Let me get it out." 

"How?!" Relena asked.

He flipped out a small knife from I knew not where, the silver blade catching the light from the chandelier and throwing spots of light about the room.

Relena's eyes grew wide. "Don't you even think about it-"

"Let him," I croaked. If this was what it took for him to believe me If this was what he had to do to understand 

He looked almost smug.

"You are not -"

"Do you want them to come here?" 

She fell silent, but her eyes were burning as she glared at him. 

"You don't even know where it is," she pointed out, her voice a bit smaller. 

"Get me some towels. And gauze." 

Her eyes still burning and a bit wider than before, she swept out of the room.

He sat on her chair and pulled something else from his pocket - a small box that was very thin and all black, except for a small switch and two lights. He flipped the switch, and one light glowed red. He held the device over my head, slowly sweeping it downward.

It must be a metal detector of some sort, I dimly realized. 

At my right wrist the light suddenly switched to green. 

"There," he said, flipping the device off and putting it back. 

"Do you do you believe me now?" I asked softly as he picked up my wrist. His grip was iron, although his hand was warm. He could almost pass for human, with that warmth. 

"Maybe," was all he said, and just then Relena returned with the towels. 

"Here," she said, still a bit angry, tossing them at the boy, who caught them as if she had handed them over nicely. She didn't look happy at that. 

"You're not going to get blood all over my floor - "

"Shut up." 

She did. 

There was a sharp pain, then something wet, sticky - he'd deftly sliced open my wrist, I saw, just to the left of the vein that ran through it, careful not to slice the vein itself. Although for all the blood pooling on the towel he'd placed on the couch. 

Then something else - something that hurt more. He had stuck the blade in, just a bit, to get at whatever it was. It hurt a lot, like hot fire shooting up my entire arm. I winced and shut my eyes, feeling the stinging saline begin to pool there of its own volition.

I opened them again, taking a deep breath, and watched with some interest as he flipped the blade up, oblivious to the deep crimson liquid staining his own hands. Something small and black flew into the air - he caught it with one stained hand and swiftly pressed one of the towels to my wrist with the other. I hissed in pain, but at least he was done. 

And maybe he believed me now. 

Relena handed him the gauze she had been holding, eyes still wide, and he removed the towel and very expertly whirled the white strip around my wrist tightly, sealing up his work. 

He wiped his hands on the towel, stood, and disappeared out the door once more. 

"Are you all right? Relena asked softly, seeing how bright my eyes were, my wrist still stinging loudly. 

"Yeah. If that's what it took for him to believe me "

She shook her head. "He wouldn't have brought you here if he wasn't looking for a reason not to kill you," she offered gently. "At least I don't think so." 

"That's comforting" I cracked a small smile, but somehow even that hurt. 

"Listen, I'm serious about you getting sleep. Then I'll call a doctor for you in the morning."

"I'll be okay. We have to find the others. And Duo." 

She smiled, then shook her head slightly. "Sleep," she commanded. "There's food here for when you wake up. Good night, Alison." 

"Thank you, Relena."

She walked away, muttering something about Heero's aspirations as a surgeon.

AN: Thanks for all the great reviews recently! I feel special! I'm so glad you like it, and I promise, more is on the way! 

Also I have no clue if I spelled Treize's name right. Sorry if I butchered it! Personally I prefer easy, spellable names (i.e. Duo Maxwell) ;)


	8. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Much as I try, I can't seem to convince Mixx that they should sell Gundam to me. So I don't own it. Too bad. ;O

The Lost Girl

Part 8

When I woke up it was still dark out - I hadn't slept for that long, then? The ceiling had an orange glow cast onto it, flickering softly - I turned my head to see a fire burning cheerfully in the fireplace at the end of the room. Relena was sitting in front of it, reading a book. 

My wrist still hurt, throbbing rhythmically with my heartbeat, and there was a heavy, dull pain in my chest. I felt a little lightheaded but it wasn't too bad, although every limb ached harshly. 

I did, however, manage to prop myself up on my elbows with somewhat less effort. 

"Relena?" My voice was scratchy, as if it hadn't been used in weeks. 

Her head snapped up; she set the book down quickly and sprinted over to the couch I was on, sitting down in the chair, her hair falling about her shoulders. 

"Alison! How are you feeling?" she asked, her hand immediately on my forehead. "You're fever's nearly gone."

"I can't have been asleep more than a couple of hours "

Her face darkened a bit. "You were out for two days."

*Two days*?!

"What?" I asked, not believing her. 

She nodded. "I called a doctor - you have two broken ribs and some nasty bruises, but he says you'll be able to walk in a few days just fine." 

Broken ribs? A few days? I didn't have that much time - I had to get out of here, had to get Heero to take me to find the other pilots - 

"Heero?" 

She sighed. "He left the night he brought you here. I don't know where he went - he must have gone after the others. That baka" 

I struggled to sit up fully. I had to get out of here. I had to get to Heero, to the others. To Duo. 

"Hey, hey!" she protested, her hands on my chest, pushing me back down with very little effort. "You're not going anywhere. You've got to stay here and rest."

"I have to get to the others" 

"No, you don't." She shook her head, hair whipping wildly about her face. "No. You're going to stay right here, Alison. Besides - I contacted Sally. She and her group are out there looking for them now. There's nothing more you can do." 

Didn't she see that it didn't matter who else got involved - *I* had to help, *I* had to go look for them.

"It doesn't matter. I still have to -"

"You're just as bad as Heero!" she exclaimed, eyes beginning to show her exasperation. "No!"

I sighed, resigned to the fact that I would at least have to stay here until she left, or fell asleep. 

In that case "Can I have something to eat, then, please?" 

Her eyes softened, and so did the rest of her expression. "Of course! Here!" She turned and pulled over a tray, stocked with some toast, water, and an apple. I gingerly picked up a piece of toast, taking a small bite. 

Toast. 

Quatre had made me toast, that morning I'd woken up so confused, sick, lost 

I squeezed my eyes shut. I was going to take care of this. I was going to get them out of this mess. 

I was sick of being hurt, sick of being confused, sick of being taken care of. The pilots needed me - or at least for me to get someone who was capable - to take care of them, to get them out of the danger that I had placed them in. Maybe Heero helped the situation, but somehow I knew that I had to do something myself, to make this right. 

Something. 

I sat and ate the toast and half of the apple. Relena watched me fiercely, as if she knew how badly I wanted to leave. 

Finally, she yawned and glanced at the clock on the mantelpiece. 

"It's nearly midnight," she observed. "I'm going to go to bed, now that I know you're all right." Suddenly she pinned me with an fierce gaze," Promise me you're not going to leave, Alison."

I sighed. I could at least make it sound convincing. "No," I answered. "I won't. Sorry I just want to help so badly" 

She smiled a bit. "I know you do. But it's not your fault. And Heero's out there looking for them, even if he is a baka. And he'll find them. You just rest, all right? I don't want to know what Duo would do to me if he came back and you were half-dead"

Duo. I didn't want to think about Duo. About where he was, if he was still alive 

"Sorry," she apologized softly, seeing the look on my face and stopping. "Anyway, you get some sleep. They'll be fine." 

"G'night," I said, and she stood and left, closing the heavy door behind her. 

I waited about ten minutes, not daring to move. Then I pulled the blanket off, and stood up. Well, tried to stand up - it did finally work, but it took me nearly a minute. What was? 

I pulled the bottom of my shirt up a bit, and saw that my middle had been tightly bound. Broken ribs. That must be the dull force I had felt before. It was constricting, but I was probably better off leaving the bandages on. I strode over to the window, knowing that since Heero hadn't gone up any stairs when he'd brought me here, I was probably still on the first floor. 

I pulled the curtain aside on the huge window, and smiled. I was on the first floor. Searching for the latch, I slowly, quietly pulled the window open, and hopped out into the night. 

I had to get to Chile. I had to get to Trowa. Only it was going to be harder, this time. I had no extra food, no gun. I had only my wallet, with my IDs and credit card. But at least that would get me a flight. Unless 

Unless what? my mind asked. For a second, there had been something - a name, perhaps, hanging on the edge of remembrance. A face, almost. Features. Two braids, twisted and falling just over her shoulders. A stern but friendly, willing face. A green uniform. 

Who was it? And why was I remembering this? I walked down the streets, Relena's mansion growing steadily smaller in the distance. I didn't really know where I was headed, but this place was fairly populated and I thought I saw city lights not too far away. 

I continued on towards the bright patch in the distance, eventually coming upon a city. Scanning the skyline, I saw the Tokyo tower. 

So we were still in Tokyo. 

That meant I could get to the airport, and get a ticket out of here. I smiled, and headed just a bit faster towards the city. 

***

When I arrived in Chile, I still had no clue how to find the base, or how to get Trowa out. I was running on autopilot, running on empty. I hadn't slept in a day, and my side was beginning to bother me more and more with each passing hour. I was hungry, but at least it was warm here. 

But how was I going to get to Trowa? I still had no idea - had no idea if he was still here, even. Maybe Heero had already gotten him out. What a waste of time this would've been, I thought with a grim smile. And my side was really beginning to hurt - 

I wasn't paying attention when I ran head-on into the stranger on the street corner, nor was I even fully aware when they grabbed my arms, as if they knew me. 

The first thing that shocked me out of my trace-like state was my name, and her voice. 

"Alison! You *are* here!"

I knew that voice, from somewhere didn't I?

I looked up to see a woman - one very much like the one that I'd almost remembered, a day ago. Hair in two twists coming down over her shoulders. Green uniform. Concerned look. 

"You were expecting me?" I asked in a small voice, not sure what to make of this. She obviously knew, me, and I was obviously supposed to know her. She didn't seem like she worked for OZ

"Relena told me you'd run off. Wufei had given me the locations of the bases they were sent to - I guess he didn't completely trust Duo. I was here looking for Heero, actually." 

So she was on our side. I sighed a bit with relief. 

"Are you all right?" she asked, peering into my face, eyes colored with concern. I was really getting sick of people looking at me that way. 

"I'm fine," I assured her, shrugging out of her grip. "Is Heero here, then?" 

She shook her head. "If he is, we haven't spotted him out. We're going to go in after Trowa tonight if nothing happens at the base."

"Oh." Maybe I would have some help, after all. 

"You don't look so well - why don't you come with me to our camp? I'll get you some food, a change of clothes. And then we'll see what the breakout situation is." 

I saw no reason not to go with her. Of course, the dull buzzing that had begun in the back of my head might have been overriding any real coherent thoughts I was having, but I nonetheless followed her stiffly down the unfamiliar streets. She turned off one and stepped into the brush; I followed, and after about half a mile through the jungle we came upon a full-blown military camp, equipped with jeeps, tents, guns, and even a tank. 

"Wow," I muttered softly, taking it all in. 

I saw her glance down at me, concern once again filling her eyes. "Are you really all right? Relena said you'd been captured - that you'd been through a lot"

"I'm fine," I replied, not really having the will or the coherence to recount it all to her now. She remained silent after that, although the looks she was periodically casting me told me she still didn't believe me. 

I was beginning not to believe me, actually. And I was very sure Relena hadn't believed me.

We came to a large tent, and she lifted the flap and slipped inside. I followed her in, and she rummaged through a cooler until she produced a bit of bread and a canteen. 

"Here, eat this for now. Let me find you some fresh clothes." 

She disappeared into the shadows of the tent as I took a few tentative bites, then quickly downed half the water in the canteen. This was a large tent, and looked like it was probably the center of operations. There was a folding table in the corner, a laptop perched on top of it and a folding chair nearby. There were coolers, and boxes that looked like they probably contained other supplies of some sort. 

She returned a few minutes later with some military fatigues: camouflage pants, a white shirt, and olive jacket. 

"Here, these'll have to do. I'm going to go see if there's been any word from the base; I'll be back in a minute." 

She left, and I quickly set about the painful task of getting changed, knowing it was going to take me a while. And it did. My side was on fire now, and my head was aching with throbbing pains that only seemed amplified in my wrist. Heero was definitely no surgeon, I thought almost amusedly, pulling the jacket on as the woman returned. 

"No word yet. We'll be going in for Trowa in an hour, then."

I nodded. "I'll come with you." 

She shook her head sternly. "No, you won't. Relena told me about your injuries. I want you to stay right here. When's the last time you slept?" 

I shrugged, silently thanking Relena bitterly for ruining my chance at redemption.

She sighed. "You've been hanging out with Gundam pilots too long," she chided. "You're beginning to act like Heero. Usually you remind me more of Duo."

I was acting like Heero? She was the second person to tell me that. And she had to go and mention Duo, didn't she? I felt my stomach twist tightly, and tried not to let it affect my voice as I spoke.

"I'm sorry," I apologized stiffly. "It's just my friends are in danger, and it's all my fault. And I cant even remember them all that well in the first place I'm sorry - I don't even know your name." 

She blinked, looking at me for a moment.

"Relena said you seemed a little confused What happened?" 

I shrugged. "I don't know. A coupla days before this all happened, I woke up and I was just there. I don't remember anything before that. At all. Quatre kind of filled me in said I was their mechanic"

"You don't remember" she murmured to herself. "I'm so sorry - my name is Sally. Sally Po."

So this must be who Relena had been speaking about. It made a little more sense now. I hadn't thought much about what she'd said at the time, not with my need to get out and look for the people whose lives I'd helped to put in danger. 

I nodded, and she continued. 

"You don't remember that's terrible. You were - are - a great mechanic. One of the best I've ever seen." 

I looked down, ashamed that I couldn't remember. It was really getting to me by now - not being able to remember the past, my knowledge even just the things my friends and I used to do Everyone seemed to know all about me. Everyone but me.

She glanced at her watch. "I'd better get going. There's some coffee in the pot over there," she said, pointing, "and I want you to stay in here until we get back. No leaving. I'm posting a guard outside the flap - I know how you people can be." 

I sighed. This time I really wasn't going anywhere, and I knew it. But as long as someone was out there, getting Trowa out, I didn't need to be on the first attack squad in. 

"Good luck," I told her softly. "Please bring him back safely." 

She nodded and left. 

***

The two following hours felt like an eternity to me. I didn't want to sleep - couldn't sleep - and so I'd been drinking a steady supply of the offered coffee, mug after mug, just staring into the dirt, as if I could create a window out into the rest of the world and find my friends that way. I just felt so ashamed at being so helpless, especially now. 

And I didn't think Heero had really trusted me by the time he left - what would Trowa say? 

Would he still be alive?   
I couldn't remember much about Trowa at all. I'd only seen him the once, when Duo had loudly woken everyone up to tell them I'd lost my memory. I remembered a tall boy, face set in a determined yet almost soft look. Hair falling over his eyes. Soft voice. Green eyes. 

There was shuffling outside, and voices. I sprang to my feet - ouch, that had not been a good idea - and made my way to the tent flap, only to be practically run over by Trowa as he and Sally entered. 

"Alison," he said, looking down at me.

He didn't seem to be ready to kill 

"Trowa," I said, my voice very small. I still wasn't sure what he was thinking - what I was thinking. What I would do if I came face to face with someone that could be a traitor 

"Are you all right?" I asked him. 

"I've been better," he admitted, but there was no real humor in his voice; he didn't say it like Duo would have. 

"I'm sorry." 

"Hey - you came after me. And Sally said you didn't look good -"

"I'm not the one who's been in captivity for the last couple of days," I muttered, looking down at my feet, unable to look him in the face even now, even when he was safe again and didn't seem all that angry to see me. 

I would've been angry to see me, that was for sure. I thought Heero had gotten it right, actually. 

"Listen - I know it's not your fault," he said softly, and I felt his hands on my shoulders. I looked up at him, at that hair falling into his face, and saw that he really wasn't angry. 

"Sally told me what Relena said. I think I believe her. I know you're no traitor, and Duo sure as hell isn't one either. He's not *that* smart," he said, cracking a small smile. 

It was contagious - I felt myself smiling too. 

"Thanks. I I can't believe I'm just glad you're okay," I said. "I'm sorry." 

"It's over now. We just have to keep our heads and go after the others," he said resolutely, and I believed him.

I believed we could do it, because we had to. We *had* to. 

"I think you both need some sleep," Sally said loudly. "We'll head out in the morning for Sydney. I've already got a party there, keeping an eye on the OZ operation down there."

"What about Heero?" Trowa asked, turning to face her. "Any word?"

"No information so far, like I said," Sally replied. 

"I understand. We'll just have to continue as if he's not going to be of any help, then." 

"I'm sure he went after someone, and we'll meet in between somewhere," Sally put in. "Now - there's some extra sleeping bags in the corner. I'm going back to my own tent; you two can sleep in here. We'll wake you up in the morning."

"Thank you," Trowa said, and Sally nodded and left. 

He went over to the corner, grabbing the sleeping bags she'd mentioned and tossing one to me. 

I caught it, rather painfully, and began unrolling it onto the ground. 

"They're not going to get away with it," he said, and I looked up. 

"I know," I said softly. 

"We'll get them back. OZ isn't getting the Gundams, or their pilots." 

I nodded, and there was a moment of silence as he unrolled his own bag. 

"Are you all right?"

"I'm all right," I said softly. It was beginning to sound like a tag line. No matter what was happening, good or bad. 'I'm all right. I'm fine.'

"You're not," he said, resolutely. "But you're like Duo. You won't tell anyone. You're always fine. I know I can't get it out of you." He cracked a small smile again. "I'll bet you Quatre can." 

He was probably right. Somehow I knew I'd talk to Quatre, if he asked. He just had something about him, something kind. Something that made it okay to talk. 

"Probably." 

"I want to get them back," he said. "I wasn't too happy with my situation, and I'm sure as hell not happy with those OZ bastards who set this whole thing up. But like I said, we're going to get them back. OZ is not going to win." 

He slid into his sleeping bag, and I did the same. 

"They won't win," he said, finally, resolutely, and turned over to sleep. 

I lay there, hearing his words echo over and over in my head. 

He was right. No matter what it took, OZ wasn't going to win. They weren't going to get the Gundam pilots.

One by one, they were fighting back. 

AN: Going away for the weekend; if I'm a *very* good girl I'll get up early and post on Saturday, otherwise the next post should be on Sunday night. Thanks for all the praise ::blushes:: and don't worry I *think* there's an end (and a Duo!) in sight! ;)


	9. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Surprise! I don't own Gundam. Who'da thought?

The Lost Girl

Part 9

The morning was crisp and clear - I was awakened to the sound of men shouting and engines running. I sat stiffly up, blinking in the golden rays that streamed in through the open tent flap.

Trowa was gone, his sleeping bag rolled up neatly in the corner like he had never been here, like I'd dreamed the whole thing. Most of the boxes and coolers were gone, and the table and chair were folded up in the corner. 

I stood and walked over to the flap, wondering why no one had woken me up if we were leaving. My side still ached, but it was also kind of numb. The buzzing in my head had reduced, and I was able to think a little more clearly as I peered out over the camp. 

Most of the tents were gone, as was the tank. There were only a few Jeeps and men here now, and Sally was over talking to one of them, Trowa standing beside her. I made my way over to them, and Sally glanced over as I approached. 

"Morning," she said shortly. "We'll be leaving in less than an hour. You and Trowa will go with Lieutenant Binns. He's been undercover at the OZ base in Melbourne, and knows how they operate in that area."

I nodded, looking up at the young man. He didn't look that old, not more than 25 or so, with light brown-blonde hair, green eyes, and a smile that seemed eager to please. He looked oddly familiar, but I couldn't place how or why. It didn't seem like I was supposed to know him; maybe I'd just seen someone once before who looked like him. He looked like that type - typical young soldier, eager to get the job done and earn praise for it. 

He nodded in greeting, and I did the same. 

"Why don't you head for the airstrip now," she suggested suddenly, looking at her watch. "Go on ahead and we'll meet you near Sydney, all right?" 

Trowa nodded, and the soldier saluted before directing us towards a nearby Jeep. Trowa climbed into the passenger seat and I managed to heave myself into the back without too much trouble. Or, at least, without making it look like too much trouble. I was almost beginning to see Relena's point, about my just sleeping until the whole thing was over, staying in bed and getting well. 

Almost. 

The picture of Duo that I could not escape from overrode that, and I sat silently in the back as Binns drove us deeper into the jungle, down a beaten path that didn't even really look big enough for a car to drive down.

Everything was a green blur, whipping by my window like my past had whipped me by, leaving me in its wake with no recollection of it. I wondered if I would ever remember. I hadn't had any more flashes, no recognition of instruments or weapons or anything. 

It was almost scarier now that it had stopped. 

"Trowa?" I suddenly asked, realizing what had been bothering me for the past five minutes. 

"Hm?" 

"Why aren't you flying there yourself? Where's Heavyarms?"

"In a carrier at the strip. I'll fly it over in a plane."

"Oh." 

There was no more conversation until we reached the small airstrip in a clearing ten minutes later, seemingly overburdened with huge carriers meant to fly the group's equipment - and Trowa's Gundam - to Sydney. 

"All right, here we are," Lt. Binns observed, parking the Jeep and hopping down. I climbed down slowly, watching one of the planes take off noisily into the sky.

"Where's the carrier?" Trowa asked, and Binns pointed to one of the larger carriers, and Trowa headed off in that direction. I stood there, unsure of where to go. Who would want me?

Trowa stopped suddenly, and turned around. "Well?"

"Well?"

"Aren't you coming?" 

I sprinted as best I could - not very well - towards him and he turned and headed off again, resolute but maybe just maybe someone who trusted me. 

I hoped so. 

Flying to Sydney didn't take as long as I thought it would. That could have been because I slept most of the way, but I wasn't sure. Binns was the only other person in the carrier, and when I finally woke up as we approached the Australian runway, I got the idea that he and Trowa hadn't exactly been chatting the whole way over. Both their faces were tight and determined, and I was beginning to wonder if this was ever going to end.

We landed with no problem, and Trowa went down into the belly of the carrier to prepare his mobile suit as Binns went out to talk to his comrades and find out the latest plan to break Wufei out. I was left alone in the cockpit for a few minutes, before I finally decided to go find Trowa. I didn't like Binns all that much - he bothered me in a way I couldn't quite say. He just did.

"Trowa?" I called, trying to make out his shape against the huge bulk of his Gundam in the darkness here.

"Over here," he called, and I headed in the direction of his voice, finding him over by the right arm, checking the flipout blade there.

"Are you are you going in alone? Or are you going to wait for Sally's help?" I asked. If it had been me, I wasn't sure what I would do, but I was sure that neither Trowa nor Sally was really going to let me help much with this at all, despite the fact that I still felt the need to be there, to do something to help Wufei. But there was nothing I could really do, and I was beginning to, dismally, realize that.

"I don't know," he said.

Anything else he might have said was cut off as Lt. Binns ran down into the darkness, calling his name.

"Trowa! There's already a fight in progress - two Gundams are attacking the base now!"

"Heero and Quatre," Trowa said softly.

Heero must have gone to Hong Kong, I realized, and freed Quatre before coming here to help Wufei.

Maybe

Maybe everything would turn out all right in the end.

If we could only find Duo

"I've got to go," Trowa said, turning and hitting a panel on the carrier's side before climbing up the suit's arm towards the cockpit. The bay doors began to open, loudly.

"What about Sally-" Binns began, but Trowa cut him off.

"She'll get here too late. I'm going *now*."

I desperately wanted to help. But how? Trowa wasn't going to stow me in his Gundam - that would be stupid - and I had no other way of getting there. I had no suit, and even if they were to lend me one - something, anything — I didn't know how to pilot it. I wouldn't even know how to fix it anymore. I was a complete waste - worthless. I didn't even know how far we were from the OZ base, or what it looked like, or how to get in

I heard the cockpit panel slide shut and Heavyarms stood, just barely clearing the doors, and took one step out, then took off for the sky. 

And I was left right here, with this stupid Lt. Binns, with nothing to do but wait, and be a burden.

"That!" Binns said, but didn't swear. Instead, he looked down at me and smiled. "Oh, well," he said lightly.

"Oh well?!" What was this guy, nuts? He bothered me; I didn't want to be around him any longer, and so I stomped out of the bay and into the sunshine, where there were men running around, stowing things in Jeeps and driving off.

"Great" I muttered, sighing. I hoped Sally would get here soon, and get this Binns off my back.

A shadow fell over me, and I turned to see the Lieutenant standing behind me.

"It must be hard," he said, "knowing you put them all in danger."

I blinked. What?! How did he

He gave me a quick, mocking salute and left. I stood there, unable to move for another minute.

What the hell had that been? How did he know what had happened, and why was

he so damn cheerful all of a sudden?

There was a sudden round of gunfire - close gunfire - and I whipped my head around to see something that made my stomach churn.

About ten yards away there was a struggle going on - Binns and a few other men, shooting at some of the other soldiers. What were they doing?

Binns' men managed to get the better of the others, and began tying them up. Binns himself happened to glance up, and I saw the grin on his face.

*He* was a traitor. He knew about me because he worked for OZ. He was so cheerful because he'd been planning to take over this base and recapture the Gundam pilots once they came back.

I had to get out of here - now. I turned and ran, my feet pounding on the pavement, each step sending a fresh shot of pain up my spine, through my chest. I didn't know if Binns had really seen me - if he even thought I was a threat - but I didn't want to hang around long enough to find out.

So I just ran, and wondered how on Earth I was going to find the pilots in time.

The strip was long, but the installation ended abruptly in a chain-link fence; on the other side lay a dirt road. Where was I supposed to go now? How was I going to get to my friends when I didn't even know where the OZ base was?

I turned to my left, and saw a small building, a shadowed, concrete structure. It looked a bit like a garage - maybe I could steal a Jeep, I realized, and at least put some distance between me and this mess, before Binns and his men actually thought to find me.

I headed for the door, pushing it open with some effort and stepping into the cool building. The heavy door swung shut behind me, cutting off the sunlight. I could hear air conditioners running, and it was pitch black in here. I fumbled for a light switch, silently praying that I would find one -

*Click*

The room was flooded with light as I flipped the switch, and I felt my mouth drop open.

Mobile suits.

The building was stocked with nothing but row after row of mobile suits. Grey, dark, they stood waiting for their pilots, for their chance at action.

"Aries" I whispered.

I blinked. Wait. These were Aries suits - I knew that like I knew night from day.

I grinned. It was coming back again. Maybe I could get in one, manage to get the radio working - call my friends.

I scrambled for the nearest suit, climbing into the open cockpit and sitting in the pilot's seat, running my hands along the panel, hoping - wishing - that I would remember

Radio radio

Radio! My hands stopped on the radio controls. I knew this was the radio. Better yet

I slid the headset onto my head, holding it to my ear with one hand since it was much too big. I flipped on the "open" switch, and began turning the dial, scanning the bands for any sign -

"*kzzkt* keep coming!"

"Heero! Look out!"

"Not a problem *kzz*"

"Nice shot."

"Thanks."

My mouth spread into a wide grin as I heard the familiar voices through the static. Maybe there was hope after all. 

I jammed the "call" button so hard it hurt. "Guys! *Guys*!"

"*kzzzkct*lison? Did you guys hear her?" That was Quatre's voice. I grinned even wider. 

"Quatre! Heero! Trowa! Listen - it's a trap here. Get Wufei out and don't come back here. That Lieutenant - Binns - Trowa, he's a spy *for* OZ. He just captured all of Sally's men!"

"*kkt* -nd how did *you* get out to call us?" Heero's voice was cold, level. Untrusting. 

But I didn't have time for that now. He didn't have time to not believe me, because if he didn't he was going to get caught. 

"I'm not lying, Heero! Come on! Please believe me! I don't know why he didn't care about me - he just grinned and went off, and the next thing I knew Sally's men were under attack. Listen, I'm not lying. Please. Don't come back here." 

"There he is!" I heard Trowa's voice call, and there was more static and intermittent explosions over the radio. I sat, listening, hoping that Wufei would make it out all right 

"*kacckct* took you so long?" Wufei's annoyed voice suddenly pierced the static. 

I exhaled, not even realizing I'd been holding my breath. But now they had to believe me, had to keep away from here - 

"Guys!" I yelled into the mike, hitting the button once again. "Guys, please, listen to me. Now that you four are together - you can't come back here. You'll just get captured again."

"What?!" Wufei sounded suspicious. 

"I don't think we can trust her," Heero said shortly. 

"*I* think we can," Trowa said decisively. "Relena did, Sally did, and I do."

"I do," Quatre put in. 

"I'm not lying," I repeated. "You've got to get out of here go after Duo. Please." My voice suddenly threatened to give out as I realized that now, he was the only one missing. That maybe this would be the way it was from now on. 

No. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be. I didn't know that, and I couldn't go jumping to conclusions like that. It was silly. I'd been over this. We'd get him out. Or I'd get him out. But he would be fine. He would be.

"*kkt* don't even know where he is," Wufei said. 

"What about you, Alison?" Quatre asked. "Are you all right?"

"I'm still at the base. I don't know how to get out. I found a bunch of old Aries suits. I'm in one now - I'm using the radio."

"*kckt* piloting?!" the second half of Wufei's question asked. 

"I don't know how to pilot!" I veritably yelled. "I'm just sitting in here! The only thing I remembered how to use was the radio, all right?!"

"We've got to get you out of there," Trowa said evenly. 

"What if she's the traitor?!" Wufei asked angrily. 

"I'm *not* a traitor, Wufei!" I yelled at him, not caring how loud I was, not caring if Binns and his men found me. Only caring that they believed me, that they didn't get themselves caught, that they would help me go after Duo. 

"Stop it. We'll get her out of there and then we'll discuss this," Quatre said, his voice suddenly firm and commanding. I didn't think I'd ever heard him sound like that, not in the brief time I could remember him. 

"Quatre!" 

"Listen, Wufei. Let's get her out, okay? Please. She's our friend. Not a traitor." 

"*kzzct*ne. Fine." 

"Good. Alison, can you remember how to work the suit at all? Anything?" Quatre asked, his voice suddenly gentle and kind again, softer. 

I looked around the cockpit, and the foreign-looking controls. Let's see. I got the radio to work 

There was the power readout. And the weapons display. 

There was the flight stick. The ignition. The main navcomputer console. 

Maybe I slapped my head with my hand lightly. "Come on work!" I whispered fiercely at my brain. "I know you know how to do this come on!"

There was the compass, and the gimbals. And that was the commlink with the other suits. 

"Alison?" 

"Yeah. I I might be able to get it out of here," I offered weakly. "I I don't know how far I could get." I looked at the cockpit around me again, my stomach churning just a bit. Was I really going to try and get this suit out of here without getting myself or anyone else killed?

"You can do it," Quatre said definitely. "You know how to."

"She's no pilot -"

"I know that, Wufei," Quatre's voice became a little more strained now. "So she won't be pulling any impressive maneuvers. Get over it. Alison, can you do this?"

I took a deep breath, and flipped the main power switch, then the ignition. The other panels around me sprang to life, lighting up, telling me all sorts of information, only some of which I could decipher. 

"Yeah," I said. "Or I'll die trying. I'm not sitting here and letting them come and get me, even if I can't really remember how to use this thing." 

"It's just like a video game," Quatre said. "Meet us at these coordinates, all right?" 

A latitude and longitude flashed up on the screen. The navcomputer quickly spat out a trajectory and ETA of 20 minutes. 

I'd have to fly this thing for 20 minutes. 

That wasn't so bad right?

"Right," I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. Which was not confident at all. 

"*kzz* Good. And good luck," Quatre said, and then static hissed in my ears. 

I took my hand off the earpiece and the headset fell around my neck. Okay, I told myself, taking a deep breath, okay. Just like a video game. 

I slid the cockpit panel closed, sealing myself into my possible deathtrap. I slid my arms through the shoulder straps and buckled myself in.

All right.

First, I had to get out of here. And I couldn't see a door. So.. 

I hit the "fore missile" button, and suddenly the building had no wall. Sunlight streamed through the massive hole I'd just blown as I grabbed the flight stick, and eased it forward. 

This wasn't so bad 

Gunfire. The panels to my left told me someone was shooting at me - ground-based men, no suits, automatic weapons. 

I could take care of that. 

I quickly scanned the weapons board and shot off some high-aimed warning rounds with my own automatic before deciding my best course of action would be to get the hell out of there. 

I really didn't want to kill anyone. 

But then there they were - a Jeep, heading right for me, one man leaning out with a bazooka rifle, taking aim - 

I closed my eyes, hit the missile button - 

*BOOM!*

The explosion rocked my suit, and when I finally dared to open my eyes, there was no Jeep. There were no men. 

At least, none alive. There were three men lying on the ground, and by the looks of them, they were dead. 

The gunfire had ceased.

Oh God. 

I just killed someone. 

I just killed three people.

It was probably more than that.

Oh God. 

Get me out of here. I just killed someone. Get me out of here. 

I could barely see as I hit the "flight" mode on the console and the suit took off, slamming me down in my seat with a force that I hadn't expected. 

Oh God. 

Just get me there, please tell me there's an autopilot - 

I found it, hit the switch, and then the only thing I was aware of was the sky, rushing by, and the silent tears running down my face. 

AN: Sorry it took me so long to post! I was out of town and then I couldn't get onto the fanfiction.net server. I think it was Heero's fault. But now I'm back on, so here's some more! 

Continuing thanks to those who love and review! 


	10. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: This one's boring - I don't own Gundam.

AN - Somehow (I don't know how, must be my switching computers in the lab all the time) I skipped this part when posting "The Lost Girl". So this goes in between parts 9 and 10. ::shrug:: Did that cause confusion? I'll re-number and re-post eventually Sorry!! :O

The Lost Girl

Part 9b

I didn't know how I managed to land. I didn't even really remember it. 

I remembered seeing the Gundams, from high above, and seeing their pilots, standing in a circle, getting closer, and closer 

"Alison!" Quatre's voice was high and worried - he scrambled into the cockpit and began working the buckles that held me in. 

I just hung my head and let him work. 

"Alison, what happened to you? Are you all right?!" 

Suddenly all I could see was his green eyes, boring right into mine, worried, scared. His hands were gripping my shoulders so hard it hurt. 

"I oh God, Quatre - I killed someone! I killed three people! I killed them!" I suddenly sobbed, unable to remain silent any longer, and he grabbed me in a tight hug. 

"Shhh it's okay, Alison. It's all right," he whispered, but I didn't know if I believed him. I didn't care if Heero killed me now - I deserved it. 

I wasn't supposed to kill people. 

My ribs hurt terribly from the wracking sobs, and I was beginning to get lightheaded and hot all at the same time. Quatre was still clinging to me fiercely, as if he were afraid that I might do something terrible if he let go. 

Maybe he wasn't wrong. 

Slowly, though, other sounds began to wash over me. 

Other voices. Wufei's voice. 

"That baka woman can't believe she's so torn up over killing a few OZ bastards"

Quatre suddenly released me and turned around; now I could see the other three pilots standing nearby, glancing up at the cockpit. Heero looked impassive. Trowa looked a bit worried, but like he was trying to hide it. 

Wufei just looked pissed.

"Wufei, shut up! She's our mechanic! She's not the one piloting - she's not the one killing!"

"But she knows how to use a gun. And she knows how to fix our suits - killing machines."

"That's different!" Quatre insisted angrily. 

I knew it was, but it also wasn't. If I had been their mechanic, I had been helping them kill, I reasoned. 

The tears were beginning to lessen, though, and something else was taking over. The need to go on. I had to get over this - at least for now - because I still wasn't done yet. I still needed to save Duo from that hell, and I couldn't think about anything else until that was done. 

If I deserved to die for killing people, it would have to wait. If I was going to tear myself up over it - and I knew I was - it would have to wait. Because Duo couldn't.

Push it down, I thought, and it won't bother me. At least, not for a little while. 

I got the feeling that was what they did, these five boys, more often than not. It worked for them

Maybe it would work for me. 

Push it down.

"Quatre" I said softly. 

He turned back around. "Are you gonna be all right?" he asked softly. 

"I don't know," I answered truthfully, sliding around him and out of the cockpit, landing clumsily on my feet, trying to ignore my burning side. "But I have to be for now. We have to find Duo."

Wufei muttered something under his breath. "Traitor."

But I was at the breaking point. 

I'd just killed men - three men - to get out of a base so I could help them get themselves to safety. So they could help their friend get to safety. My friend. Duo.

"Just shut up, Wufei!" I screamed, and he even looked almost taken aback. "I'm not a traitor, and Duo sure as hell isn't one! We're going to get him out of wherever he is, because we have to! He's your friend! He's my friend! So you're going to help! I just *killed people* over this, dammit!"

There was silence for a long minute. 

"She's right," Trowa finally said. "It does us no good to stand here and bicker. We have to find Duo."

"Why?! Why not just leave him to rot, if he is a traitor?" Wufei asked, eyes narrowed. "Don't tell me you *believe* this - "

"I do. But that's not the point," Trowa said evenly, but firmly, so that Wufei didn't interrupt as he went on. "But if you don't believe that, look at it this way. If OZ has Duo, they have two things we can't afford for them to have. One of our Gundams, and one of our pilots. Like Quatre said - we can deal with anything else later, if you still feel there's something to deal with. But if this is the motivation you need, I'm giving it to you. Do you want OZ to have a Gundam? *And* its pilot?"

Wufei stood there, looking at Trowa with fierce, angry eyes, and I could tell he couldn't come up with a reasonable argument for that. 

It almost made me feel better when he finally growled, "Fine."

"Heero?" Trowa turned to the brunette pilot, who hadn't said a thing, at least not that I'd heard. 

"Let's get him. Then we can discuss this," he said, but there was something in his eyes something human.

Friendship? Loyalty?

Something. 

"Good," Quatre said, taking my hand and leading me over towards his mobile suit. "Why don't we all get some sleep and discuss our plans in the morning." He didn't end it as a question - he ended it as a statement.

At first, I'd gotten the impression that Heero was in charge. 

But no - now, I realized, it was Quatre. He was rational, but with a touch of compassion in his logistic reasoning. He was a leader, and they were obviously listening to him, even if no one had ever actually said so. 

"What?" I asked, but he just let go of my hand once we'd reached the suit and waved a hand at a nearby rock, motioning for me to sit. 

I did so, stiffly. My side 

He went over to one of the side panels in the leg, and pulled out a metal box, bringing it back over to where I sat. 

He opened it, and took something out, handing it to me. 

Pills. I looked at my palm. 

"You look like you're in pain," he said softly. "Those'll help a little." 

" Thanks, Quatre," I said weakly, then swallowed them dry. 

"I've got some extra blankets you can use," he said, then pulled something else out of the box. A roll of medical tape. 

"You look like you need this, too," he said. 

I blinked, confused, and he pointed to my shirt. Around the middle, in a neat band, the white shirt Sally had given me had become rusty brown with dried blood. My previous bandages must not have been holding up

"Yeah. It was beginning to hurt a lot thanks," I muttered again. 

"I know you miss him," he said softly, suddenly getting up. But it was only to pull a few wool blankets from another compartment. He brought them over and handed two of them to me. 

"I it's my fault, Quatre. If I hadn't been there - "

"But you were. It's no use thinking about what might have been," he said. "So don't agonize over it. What's done is done. Now we'll fix it, all right?" 

I looked up to see him smiling, a smile that reached up to his eyes. 

He meant so well, and I was grateful beyond words for his freely given friendship. 

"Quatre Thanks." I reached out and gave him a quick hug, in thanks, and then headed off to find some privacy so I could change my bandages.

When I came back, Wufei was sitting by Shenlong, polishing a katana, Trowa was sleeping near Heavyarms, and Heero was sitting with his back to a tree, playing absently with a handgun, spinning it around his index finger while looking out at the trees, eyes slightly unfocused but still sharp and aware. 

Quatre had laid a blanket on the ground, and was snuggled beneath a second one, curled up like a little boy. It almost made me want to laugh. I set my own blankets on the ground, and crawled beneath them. My side was sore from the change of bandages, and I wasn't sure I really wanted to sleep. 

I just wanted all the horrible images to leave my mind. Duo. Binns grinning. The dead men. 

I closed my eyes, not seeing black, but seeing Duo's blue eyes, staring at me, asking me silently why I wasn't there to help him. 

I was trying. 


	11. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam. I bet you I never will.

The Lost Girl

Part 10

When I woke up, the sun was just rising in the east. Trowa and Quatre were no longer asleep, and if Wufei and Heero had ever been, they weren't now. All four pilots were sitting around a slowly dying campfire, talking in hushed voices. 

I got up slowly, the pain in my side jabbing at me as I stood. I ignored it, walking over to the campfire. 

Quatre looked up as I approached. 

"Morning," he greeted me, scooting over just a bit so I could sit down next to him. There was something in his voice something that wasn't right. It didn't sound as cheerful as it usually did. I brushed it off, figuring he must be tired. I knew I certainly was. 

"We think we have a plan," Trowa told me as I sat down between him and Quatre. "But we need you to help us." His voice, too, was tight.

"Anything," I said quickly, hoping to at least be able to do something to help Duo. 

"We're going to send Heero in to the last OZ base where they're holding Duo," he began. 

"But we don't know where that is!" I protested. I had been there, and I didn't know where it was. How did they possibly know?

"Yes, we do," Wufei said. 

"How?" 

He stood and walked over around his Gundam; he reached behind the leg and pulled something out. Or, rather, *someone*.

"Binns." 

"Right," Wufei said, coming back over and dragging the well-bound man with him, a smirk on his Oriental features to rival Duo's most devilish grin. "Look what we caught sneaking around here last night." 

Above his gag, the Lieutenant's eyes were wide and frightened, and I was pretty sure that whatever Wufei had done to him, it had not been nice. His clothes were tattered, and rust-colored stains - bloodstains - crisscrossed his sleeves.

"Talked up a storm, after I convinced him it was better than remaining silent," Wufei said smoothly. 

"He told you where they're keeping Duo?" I asked, hope once again beginning to shine through the clouds.

Wufei nodded. "It took some persuasion. But he talked in the end." 

"Okay," I said slowly. I didn't like the mental picture I was getting - I was pretty sure that I would never, ever want someone like Wufei to interrogate me - but somehow I couldn't feel as sorry for Binns as I would have thought. 

He knew it was my fault, and he wasn't afraid to say so. Like Heero, and like Wufei. 

Not now. 

"You're going with Heero," Trowa said. 

I was going in? To get Duo? Part of me was ecstatic - that I could go, that I could personally make sure he was all right. But what good was I? They wouldn't send me without a reason. My stomach twisted a bit.

"Not that I'm complaining - I want to go - but why are you sending me in? I mean, I'm an extra body with no real purpose -" Was I going to convince them to keep me here when I really did want to go?

"You have a purpose," Heero said. 

"Let's just hope we don't have to use it," Quatre said shortly, then stood, turning toward Sandrock. "Come on, I've got some extra weapons packed away." 

I stood, looking down at the two pilots still seated and the Chinese boy holding the bound soldier. 

Something was off. And I didn't like it. And as much as I wanted to go right now, not ask any questions, just go and get Duo 

I couldn't. 

"Okay," I said firmly, and Quatre turned back around, the worry suddenly clear on his face.

"What is going on?" I demanded, making sure my voice was as firm and level as I could make it. Getting hysterical wasn't going to make them tell me anything. Not that I was one to get hysterical, but having everyone shut off from me like this especially Quatre, who had thus far been nothing but kind and open 

Quatre looked at the ground, and Trowa tried to remain as impassive-looking as possible. 

"You're a traitor," Heero said coolly, after a moment of silence. 

Hadn't we already been through this?!

"I'm *not* a traitor," I said, unable to keep the slight exasperation from my voice. I thrust my right wrist out, the newly-applied gauze of the night before gleaming white in the morning sunlight. 

I ripped off the gauze, revealing the scabbed, slightly jagged wound that lay beneath, that I was more than certain was going to scar. 

"You don't trust me, after you took this *thing* out! That I didn't know was there?!" 

"You could have been lying," Wufei said levelly. "You *were* lying." 

Beside him, the Lieutenant's green eyes sparkled, the fear leaving them momentarily. 

Green eyes. 

*He* was 

That cab driver. He'd been driving the cab, that day I left for San Francisco. It was him. And then at Sally's camp, and now here in AustraliaWhat was this all about?

"He he was you've been following me!" I exclaimed, looking straight at Binns. He didn't turn away. He didn't even blink.

"Listen," I pleaded, pointing to the captive still in Wufei's grasp, "did he tell you that? He's been following me, then, ever since"

"You showed up back on Earth," Wufei finished. 

Earth? Had I been? 

The OZ base. The one where I was being held, where Duo was still being held. That had been in *space*?

"How did you get back here, to the docks? How did you get out to go after Heero?" Wufei asked, the suspicion in his voice clear now. 

"I I don't know," I had to admit. There was a sick feeling in my stomach, like I had dropped down an elevator shaft. Like I was in freefall, with nothing left to grasp at, nothing to hold on to and no one to reach out for me

"You're a spy. He told us." 

I looked at Wufei pleadingly, like how could he believe someone like that over 

Someone like me. I had no excuse. But I had known them, hadn't I? For months? Why would they? 

Because of Duo, because of what OZ had made him do. Because, like they were implying, all the evidence was solid, and it all pointed to me. 

But it couldn't be true. 

It couldn't be. 

But I couldn't remember anything. What if what if I *was*? 

I felt like I was going to die, like I was going to collapse. I turned and saw Quatre, looking at me with this deep, unreachable pity in his eyes. 

He didn't believe this, something inside of me whispered. And if he did, he didn't want to. 

Trowa had remained silent as well. Maybe 

There was no way. What else was I going to do? No amount of talking was going to convince them if I couldn't back it up. 

And I couldn't. 

I blinked. 

It was too perfect. The odds were too stacked against me. 

"You're coming with me," Heero said smoothly, softly. "And I'm going to trade you for Duo. And then I'm going to kill you." 

Quatre looked like he wanted to say something. But he didn't, just looked at me with those deep green eyes filled with pity, and turned away, going over to his Gundam and sitting down, refusing to look over. 

Trowa was looking at his feet. Wufei was looking at me like he wanted to kill me right here and now, and I could tell that if Binns could have smiled - grinned - he would have been. 

What could I do now? 

Except go, and let Heero trade me for Duo. 

An eye for an eye. A life for a life. Was this what it was going to take? 

AN: Thanks again to continuing reviewers! It means a lot! And yes, the boys are going to kick some ass!


	12. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Gundam's not mine, I don't own it in any way, shape, or form, etc.

The Lost Girl 

Part 11

The next hour or so was a blur. Heero had handcuffed me, the metal chafing my wrists, cutting into the wound he'd made only days before, but he didn't seem to notice. He'd led me over to his Wing Zero, and he'd shoved me in the back compartment. 

I'd been shut into the darkness, and I'd been in here for an hour, at least. I'd heard Heero and Wufei drag Binns up, heard him punch the coordinates in, heard Binns call to the OZ base. 

"I've been captured. They know about Alison."

I'd heard Heero talking to them.

"I've got something you want," he said. "You have something I want. If you don't agree to a trade, I'm going to destroy you and the pilot. Then you'll have nothing." 

They'd agreed. I was sure the quiet talking that Heero had done after those initial sentences - the other words I couldn't hear — had had something to do with that. 

"You can't have the Gundam," the voice from the OZ base had said. "We don't have it anymore. It's been sent somewhere else." They were lying - even I could tell that.

"Then send me the coordinates. Or I'll kill one of your agents."

The voice on the other end had chuckled. "Will you, now?"

And Wufei had killed Binns. 

I'd heard it, the quick *swish* of metal, the sound of the blade Gasping for breath, slowly becoming quieter, less-desperate I had nearly been sick. I had wanted to be sick. I had wanted to die.

There had been silence. Then, "We'll trade. The girl for the boy. That's it." 

More silence. 

Heero's voice, hard and cold, and very unhappy. "Fine."

He wasn't mad because he had to trade me. He was mad because they would only give him Duo, and not Deathscythe as well.

I had wanted to die. 

Now, sitting here in the dark, I still wanted to die. 

I was going to die anyway. Heero was going to kill me. And I knew he was good to his word. He *would* kill me. 

Somehow I'd detached myself from the whole thing. Somehow I wasn't frightened. I was just kind of floating, my mind chasing itself in lazy circles, running back and forth through hazy half-memories. 

Duo would be safe, at least, I told myself. 

I was going to die, but he would be safe. 

Somehow that mattered more to me than my own life. 

Somewhere, *that* frightened me. 

That, and the fact that I couldn't possibly see how Trowa and Quatre could doubt Wufei and Heero now. How they could have stood behind me at all. How I could not be a spy and a traitor, after what I'd been told, what I'd been through. 

Not that I was a very good spy, granted. I didn't know I was a spy. But I was a spy nonetheless. 

Heero had begun speaking again. 

"Wing Zero ready to dock. Have my package ready, and I might let you escape before I blow this base to hell." His voice was so level, so emotionless. Like it had been before, when he'd kicked me out of his cockpit. When he'd told me I was a traitor. 

Now I believed him. 

The base replied; I couldn't make out what they said, but suddenly the mobile suit shuddered. We were docking. 

The compartment slid open and Heero's slim arm reached in and his iron grip grabbed me, dragging me out, not caring as I banged my still-bruised head on the overhead piloting panel. 

Not that I was going to cry out, or anything like that. Not now. 

My emotions had drained out of me, I felt. I was a walking automaton, my body breathing and pumping blood and pain through my limbs. Nothing more. 

I blinked in the harsh white light - light that I had spent a day in before, trapped here with Duo, watching him being forced to betray the other pilots 

And then I saw him. 

And the emotions came flooding back, and my eyes stung, and Heero kicked at my legs so I fell to the ground, scraping my knees, but my gaze never left the boy before me. 

"Heero Alison!" 

He was thin - so much thinner than he had been before, his face gaunt, his braid unkempt and dirty. Loose strands fell about his face, and the handcuffs that bound him looked almost big enough to slip off. But the huge guard holding him by his arm was there to make sure they didn't. 

His left arm was badly bruised, blotched purple and brown against his pale skin, and I couldn't tell if the bone had reset or not. 

His eyes, though 

His eyes held hope. Still sparking blue. Still full of life, although the rest of him seemed so dead. And his voice - it had not been that of a broken person. It had been that of a playful, loudmouthed boy who'd just been forced to do something unpleasant for a while. That was it. *Duo* was still safe. 

And part of me was happy, joy flooding in through gates I had thought were closed, washing over me and warming me just a little. 

They hadn't broken his mind, his spirit. He was going to be okay. 

It was over,then. For real. It was over. 

Heero stood, looking Duo up and down. 

"Here," he said flatly, kicking me over. My face hit the metal grating, scraping skin off, but I didn't care. It just didn't matter anymore. 

I pushed myself up to my knees again. Duo was looking at me with that still-sparkling gaze, but it was partly clouded with confusion and concern. 

"And here," the guard said, shoving Duo at Heero so hard that he crashed into the icy-eyed brunette before pushing himself off and pinning Heero with a confused gaze. 

"Get outta here before the Lady changes her mind," was the guard's advice.

And he grabbed my handcuffs, pulling me up to my feet. 

"Heero?" Duo asked softly, confusion now clouding his voice. "What are you doing?"

"Ending this," the boy replied, and pulled out a handgun. 

He aimed it at my head - I could look right down the barrel into the belly of the gun; I could imagine the bullet there, waiting for me, calling my name. 

"Hey!" Duo's voice pierced the air, too-loud and urgent. The guard was still holding me, looking at Heero like he really didn't care if I lived or died, now that his job was done. It seemed almost strange to me that he would have let Heero pull a gun in the first place but what wasn't weird at this point; maybe it was part of some bigger plan, get rid of me now

"Heero!" Duo continued. "Listen, I know you've got some weird-assed idea of the word 'rescue', but let me tell you -"

"I'm going to kill her," Heero said flatly, coldly, cocking the gun. 

"YUY!" Duo's voice was more urgent; he raised his handcuffed arms, reaching for the weapon. "There's no way in *hell* I'm going to let you kill my -"

"Then you'd better look someplace else."

*BANG*!

"Please! Help me, oh God, please!" I screamed, I was screaming, incoherently, anything, anyone, please, please - 

"Hey! Calm down!" 

I shot straight up in bed, sweating, heart racing, confused. I was in a dimly-lit room, posters on the walls... The complex?

"Shh, shh..." I was pushed gently but firmly back onto the pillow and blinked up as a hand ran over my forehead, wiping some of the sweat away. 

It was Duo, looking down at me, concerned yet comforting at the same time. 

"D-Duo?" I managed to get out between suddenly nearly-chattering teeth. It was cold in here. 

"Shh, you're awake now. You're home - it's safe here. Don't worry. Just stay there, I'll be right back." He swept up off his chair and out of the room, but was back in what seemed to be seconds, a steaming mug in one hand, a towel in the other. 

He set the mug on the nightstand and ran the towel over my forehead, sitting back down as he did so. "How are you feeling?"

"I... I don't know. Okay," I mused. Nothing hurt, although I was dizzy, scared, and confused. "I'm kind of dizzy though."

He nodded. "Just stay down there, okay?"

"What happened? I...Heero" 

There was a bit of a grin - a grim smile, really - as he answered. "Yeah, well, you're okay now."

"I I thought he was going to kill me."

He nodded slowly. "You worried me."

"What?" I could feel myself flushing the slightest bit. "Sorry."

He shook his head. "Not your fault," he said shortly. 

"Don't worry about me. It's ended up causing more trouble than it's worth," I told him weakly. 

"Can't help it." He smiled down at me, a suddenly weak, scared smile, not at all like the regular Duo grin that I was used to. 

And I was still confused. "How did you how did you convince him not to - "

"I didn't. He did." 

The air in the room suddenly became freezing - it was like being in a block of solid ice. I shivered again. 

"But this -"

"Shh," he whispered, placing a finger to my mouth, bending down. "I'm not going to lie to you. I'm the God of Death, I've got a job to do -" 

Something exploded in my stomach and I screamed - 

"Shut her up!" 

That voice - I knew that voice. The voice from my dream, days ago, cold but laughing, just before I'd woken up to find myself in the complex on the docks near Tokyo 

The voice of the woman, with the tight braids and sharply-glinting glasses, the ice-cold tones as she told Duo what she was going to make him do. 

I was in hell. 

But then the screaming stopped.

I opened my eyes to find myself on that bed again - that table, really, strapped down at the slight angle with the harsh light in my face. My head hurt, my chest hurt, and my stomach was on fire like it was going to burn me up from the inside out. I probably couldn't have moved even if I could have tried.

Maybe this had **all** been a dream, maybe Duo hadn't had to betray 

No. That had been real. And this was real too. 

That woman was looking down at me, her lips pressed together, her face stern. 

There was someone bustling about to the left. 

"Better, Lady?" a male voice asked. 

"I suppose," she snapped. "But really, having to go through all that trouble just to save her nearly-worthless little life and after losing Binns to those "

"Easy, my Lady," the man said. "She is of some use yet." 

I opened my dry mouth, tried to speak. I had screamed, I should be able to speak - 

But I couldn't. Nothing came out. I stared at the woman, both frightened and angry. 

What had they done to me *now*? And where was Heero, where was *Duo*?

Why was this place still here? Hadn't Heero been planning on blowing it up?

Hadn't he *killed* me? 

"And the neuro-inhibitors work, see, my Lady?" the man asked. "Not a sound out of her now. Nothing but information." 

She nodded curtly, then walked away, leaving the air cold behind her, like it would break and fall to the ground in tiny shards. She sat in a metal chair off to the side, and fixed her icy gaze on me from there. I could just turn my head enough to see her, and I gave her the angriest look I could manage. 

I still wanted to kill her. 

Despite those dead men, tearing at my soul, telling me I was no longer human 

*She* still had to pay

"I see your 'friends' had lost faith in you by now. Too much evidence to the contrary," she said icily. "Ah, well, we had meant for it to be that way. I've found that when you break their spirit first they tend to render up their brains' information more easily. Haven't you found that, doctor?" 

"Yes, Lady," the man said gruffly, now working at some controls. 

Then it began - a slow, insidious pain that crept into my head, into my mind, as if it were trying to tear my being - my soul - apart. Slow, piercing, needle-sharp pain. 

I tried not to wince, tried to keep staring at her. I wanted to kill her wanted to kill her so badly 

Why was this place still here?

"You little friends got away," she spat at me. "Just barely — the Wing Zero was too crippled to carry out the threats on our lives, here in this peaceful little base of ours." She smiled sweetly and it made me sick. 

"They're not going to come back for you," she said. "They don't trust you. None of them do. You know that, and I know that.

"He doesn't love you anymore. You betrayed him." 

I blinked. *What*?! My mind hissed. That word. He he hadn't in the first place she was just trying to get at me, break me 

But I was already broken. Duo was safe - they were all safe, I guessed - and I had no more reason to go on. I couldn't remember what I had had before this, I couldn't remember something that I wanted to go back to simply because I couldn't *remember* - 

I blinked again. That pain it was steadily growing, steadily ripping my brain, my mind, to pieces, cauterizing as it went, burning away, chipping away 

"I'm nearly finished, Lady." 

"Good. Little girl, you've been such a help, it's almost a shame to finish what Yuy started. You were such a good spy, you know. You didn't know you were a spy - you couldn't remember." She smiled again, eyes flashing dangerously. "And putting you back in that complex, unhurt, well that was just fun. I knew they wouldn't trust you then, knew you couldn't explain that one away. But I had *no* idea - not before we'd captured you and your little Maxwell No idea. Got so close to him, didn't you? And it hurt, didn't it, good little girl, good spy. Such a good job, little girl." And she laughed, and the pain increased, until I wanted to scream, *tried* to scream so hard - 

I *was* a spy. That was why I'd been saved, not killed, put back in the complex and had been able to go after Heero so easily. That was why they were tracking me, both mechanically and with Binns. 

I *was* a traitor. And I couldn't even remember it. 

Well wouldn't the best spy be one who didn't know they were a spy? One who went in and became part of the group they were sent to gather information on, better able to fit in because they *weren't* acting? 

The perfect spy. 

Nearly killed by the perfect soldier. 

No. He'd killed me. With those eyes, those words. I'd wanted to die then, I'd thought. 

But I had died. 

Anything I'd had, anything I could've gone back to, even if I couldn't remember it 

It was all a lie anyway. It was all gone. 

And they weren't coming back. 

And they hadn't even been kind enough to kill me. 

Only OZ was going to kill me now, do what they would with one of their own, only they couldn't kill me because I was already dead. Heero's eyes, Heero's gun had told me so. 

My body just didn't know it yet. 

The pain was tearing me apart; my eyes were stinging, watering, sound had become silence, the room was turning a greyish sort of red, and she was smiling - no, laughing, softly, to herself. 

"I told you it would be fun, didn't I? Don't tell me you didn't have fun "

"*I* didn't have fun. So guess what, bitch - you're not gonna have fun either." 

A singsong voice filled the air, loud and obnoxious, and there was a crash. A bang. A flash of light - sparks. 

The pain stopped, almost such an abrupt absence of it that its leaving almost ripped me to shreds more painfully than its presence had. 

The world slowly resumed its motion, its life, air on my face and in my lungs, eyes showing me 

I was dreaming. I had to be. Or I was dead. That was more likely. My brain's last dying moments, concocting this 

This angel. 

The angel dressed in black, clothes just a little to big on his gaunt frame, holding the gun to the woman's head as she sat, motionless, her face devoid of emotion. 

The doctor's body on the floor, his white lab coat stained red, the puddle spreading, dripping through the floor grates. 

"Who the hell are *you* to tell her I don't love her anymore?" he asked. "Eh, wait, I'll answer that myself. You're *dead*."

And then something exploded - a gunshot - and I winced and there was something wet on my face 

I opened my eyes. It was blood, drenching me, and the woman's dead body on the floor was spreading more of it across the paneling 

The angel - no, the god; the God of Death, Shinigami, that's who he was - came over and untied me. Flipped me over his back, and carried me out of there. 

There were voices in the hall. Three of them, to be exact. 

"Is she all right?!" 

"She'll be better once we get out of here." 

"Let's go then." 

"That's the most intelligent thing I've ever heard you say, Wufei." 

"Duo - "

"Shut up, Trowa. Just help me get her out of here and wipe this place out of existence." 

Walking, shoes clicking on metal. Doors opening and closing. 

Climbing, swinging up a rope with me still on his back. 

If I was dead, and my brain was inventing this, shouldn't it be running out of oxygen soon?

Sitting, laying me across his lap, cockpit panel sliding shut, taking off and flying out into space 

"Ready to do this?" 

"Yes. On three."

"One two three!" 

An explosion, rocking the entire suit, filling the screen and bathing the cockpit in red and yellow before dying out in the blackness of space. 

"Let's go home." 

Then my brain's oxygen ran out.

AN: Okay! Look, you got Duo back! And there's only one more part to go if I can get around to it I might put it up tonight.

Thanks to those who have stuck with this and enjoyed it; I'm glad you did!


	13. Default Chapter Title

Disclaimer: Still don't own Gundam Wing, still wish I did

The Lost Girl

Part 12

Everything hurt. I could feel my entire body, and all of it ached with a steady throbbing that wasn't seeming to diminish with time as I woke up. I waited a moment more, then finally tried to open my eyes. I blinked a couple of times, seeing only the blur of the white ceiling above me. My vision slowly began to focus a bit more, although there was still a misty sort of haze that seemed to hang in front of my eyes, 

I could hear the soft, intermittent beeping of an EKG somewhere to my left, as well as the steady buzzing of overhead lights. The room was so bright that it was nearly too painful to keep my eyes open. My neck, although sore, seemed to be willing to work, and I swiveled my head to the left, trying to see where exactly I was and what was going on. 

There was a bed next to mine, and in it a boy was sitting, staring at a tray of food and holding a fork. He didn't particularly look like he wanted to eat whatever it was that had been placed before him. I laid there, squinting at him. Something about him was off

"What are you staring at?" he asked in a sullen, low voice; he had not turned his head, nor even actually moved at all. How he knew I was looking at him in the first place was beyond me. 

He turned his head slowly, looking at me with an icy-blue stare that could've frozen the blood in my veins. His left eye was puffy and bruised, a black eye more impressive than any I could have imagined.

"Nothing," I replied; he sounded like he was wound up pretty tight, and I didn't want to be the one to set him off. Something in the back of my head was very sure of that. 

Well, of course I didn't want to set him off. This was Heero Yuy we were talking about, after all. 

I blinked. 

Heero. 

I felt a very small smile tempt my lips. Heero Yuy. With a black eye. Who'da thought?

"I'm not looking at anything," I said softly, smiling. 

"Then stop it."

I turned my gaze back to the ceiling, not wanting to deal with him at the moment. I'd just have to laugh at him later. And figure out how the "perfect soldier" had ended up with such a beautifully perfect black eye. 

"Sorry," I apologized softly, but he didn't reply. 

The ceiling was, just as before, white and too bright, and I closed my eyes. The dull pain raking my body was constant and unrelenting, and I was beginning to wish that I wasn't awake. 

Just then, the door burst open; I opened my eyes to see two boys and two bouquets of flowers barge in. 

A blond, carrying daffodils, and a brunette, with a cast on his left arm, carrying lilies. 

Quatre Raberba Winner, and Duo Maxwell. 

"Alison! You're awake!" Quatre's voice sounded both joyful and relieved; he ran over to hug me as I managed to just barely push myself into a sitting position. 

Wow. I felt as battered as a rag doll as his arms encircled me, squeezing me tightly to him. 

"I'm so glad you're all right!" he exclaimed, pulling away. "Here!" He set the flowers on the table beside my bed. "We'll find you a vase in a minute. You're awake!" he repeated, as if he couldn't believe it. 

Duo was still standing there, just looking at me. 

Then, "Don't you go trying to pull that on me again!" he said firmly, pressing the flowers into my hands. 

"I I won't" 

"Good!" he snapped. Then he brightened, and pulled a lily out of the bunch.

"And Yuy!" he said, taking a step towards Heero's bed and shoving the flower at him so quickly that the other boy actually took it on impulse. "Here's for being such a good sport!" 

Heero looked at the flower in his hand, and fumed. For a second I thought the flower was going to wilt and die, a blackened cinder under his gaze. 

"You wonder how he got that black eye?" Quatre whispered to me, a spark of something mischievous in his eyes. 

No suddenly, I didn't wonder. Suddenly it was almost hilarious. 

"So! I'm going to get you some vases, all right? Get well soon so you can come home!" Quatre said louder, brightly, and cast a grin at Heero before leaving the room. 

"I'm leaving before I kill you all," Heero announced, sliding off his bed and heading out the door, somewhat dizzily-looking. I was suddenly sure he wasn't supposed to be leaving, but obviously he wasn't going to let something like that stop him. 

Duo crossed the small space back to my bed. I set the flowers on the table beside Quatre's and looked at him, a bit confused, a bit scared. 

He suddenly leaned over me, squeezing me into a tighter hug than Quatre had, a hug that hurt like hell but felt like heaven at the same time. I managed to get my weak arms around him as he rested his cheek on my shoulder; I found myself burying my face in his neck, stray strands of his hair tickling my nose. He was still very thin, I noticed, and his left arm was held like he was favoring it.

"I'm so glad you're awake," he whispered, mouth close to my ear. "I can't believe I almost lost you again." 

"Duo" I began, but then I noticed something. 

He was crying...?

I shoved him away lightly and looked at his face as he straightened up; there were no visible tears but his eyes were bright and wet in the harsh overhead lights, and he was smiling like it hurt him to do so. 

"I'm so glad you're awake," he whispered again, and I bit my lip. Something inside me hurt - a lot - to see him like this. More than it had hurt when I'd been afraid that he was going to die, than when Heero and Wufei had spat "traitor" like they would never look back.

"Duo, please. It's okay. I'm fine."

He shook his head, braid swinging violently behind him as he did so. "I don't care. I thought I was going to lose you for good. They weren't sure if they could do anything, you'd lost so much blood and your broken ribs and your head... They didn't think you'd pull through."

"Well, how else would I be able to keep on annoying you?" I asked weakly, and his smile spread just a bit. 

"You scared me," he said. "Bad girl."

"I know," I said softly. "I won't do it again."

"Promise?" he whispered, the question soft yet begging, blown away on the air. 

"Promise," I said, although I inwardly cringed at the obvious lie behind my answer. I couldn't promise him that, not when it just seemed to keep happening to me. 

He seemed to know that. "Liar," he said, pressing one finger to the tip of my nose. 

"Yeah, well. I can promise that I'll try to stay safe," I offered. "No more adventures for me anytime soon." 

He nodded. "Good enough." 

There was a sudden knock on the door, and a nurse I didn't recognize stuck her head in. "Time to go, Maxwell. She needs rest, and you know it. Out - hey," her eyes narrowed as she saw the empty bed beside me. "Where's Yuy?"

Duo shrugged, a grin spreading across his face. "I dunno. Guess he skipped out on ya." 

The nurse sighed, exasperated, and I couldn't help but smile. "That damn kid!" Then she looked back at Duo. "One minute, Mr. Maxwell." And she was gone. 

He sighed, then looked at me again, a shadow of his regular smile creeping back onto his face. "Listen, you get better for real this time, y'hear?" 

I smiled back. "Yes, sir."

"Good." 

And then his eyes darted about the room for a moment, and he glanced from side to side - 

And he bent down and kissed the top of my head, barely a movement at all before straightening up and turning on his heel, making his way to the door. 

"Get some rest. I'll see you again soon."

All I could do was sit there, and try to believe that I wasn't dead. 

***

"Duo?" I called, opening the door to our joint room and pocketing the keycard as I walked into the room. I hadn't seen him again soon - the doctors had cordoned me off and I wasn't allowed nearly any visitors, and it had been almost two weeks since I was brought in. I had just been discharged, and sent back home with strict orders not to do anything even almost strenuous for at least another week. Not something I was looking forward to. 

And my memory was gone for good. There was no way to retrieve anything before the first day I could really remember - past where this had all begun. There had been endless tests, endless CAT scans and endless other procedures. 

Something had worked - something that had caused memories of circuits, wires, and panels to begin trickling back into existence. Sometimes faces, sometimes voices. 

But no real memories would ever come back, they told me. The pathways had been too far degraded by the OZ neuro-inhibitors and whatever they had done to me beforehand, months or years ago. My past was lost.

I didn't know how I felt - on the one hand, I wanted to know what my life had been like "before" - even if I had been a spy, I hadn't known it, and I had had some life here with the pilots before any of this happened. 

On the other hand, part of me was okay with the loss. I didn't know what I was missing so I didn't miss it as much, or something like that. 

But this whole Duo thing. not to mention the fact that Heero hadn't really spoken to me, and I hadn't even seen Wufei at all. Trowa had stopped by once, and I was sure he would've been in trouble had he been caught, smiling just a bit and telling me he was glad I was finally back. He'd said Wufei was sorry in his own way, that he had mostly forgiven me and he didn't hate my guts. That he was still, in his own way, my friend. That Heero was too - he hadn't made any more attempts on my life, had he?

In Heero's way, that said it would be okay. 

"Al?" I heard him ask, and I stepped out into the living room to see him rise from the couch and bound over, enveloping me in another tight hug despite the cast still on his arm, only this one didn't hurt quite so much and I was able to return it much more easily.

He pulled away and held me at arm's length, looking me over as if sizing me up. "You need food," he announced - I thought this was almost funny coming from him, who still looked a tiny bit too thin from his time spent on that base - then headed for the kitchen. I sighed and followed him, entering the tiny room to see him digging through the fridge, shoving aside pizza boxes and the like. Boys. You leave them alone for two weeks and they forget how to prepare their own food, I thought. At least he'd be gaining that lost weight back quickly.

"Here," he said, straightening up and turning around, handing me a Tupperware containing macaroni and cheese. 

I grinned. "Thanks!"

He grinned back and found me a fork, pointing towards the table. I sat and began eating; he sat across from me and just watched me. 

It got uncomfortable after about thirty seconds, and I put down the fork to look at him. 

"What?"

"Duo" 

He sighed, and dug his fingers in his hair. "Look. I I'm sorry about Hell, I don't even know what I'm sorry for. But - " He paused, then took a breath.

"Look, this whole thing was just so weird. I thought I'd lost you for good, I thought I was dead. And then Heero showed up, and you showed up, and I thought everything was gonna be okay, but then it wasn't and he - I thought he killed you. 

"We barely got out of there alive. I didn't know if I wanted to get out alive, then. They just kept shooting at us until the Wing Zero was so disabled all Heero could do was fly it back. And when we got back I think I tried to kill him - I beat him up and gave him that black eye and a concussion before Trowa and Wufei pulled me off And Quatre said we were going after you, because he didn't believe all that traitor bullshit, and"

He trailed off, looking down, his eyes falling for a second on the white scar on my wrist before finding the wood grain of the table.

"I know part of you is gone for good, spy or no spy or whatever the hell any of this was about before," he said. 

Then he looked up, and he was Duo again, grinning like an idiot, ready to face the world with a badass Gundam and a smartass remark. "But welcome home." 

"I you mean it?" Something was breaking through, some kind of hope, this time for real. Maybe I had a place, and maybe it was with them. 

"Pfft, hell yeah! My poor Deathscythe went down with that base - I need a new Gundam! Who else is gonna build it for me?"

The End

AN: Thanks to everyone who reviewed it, loved it, etc.! The great reviews meant a lot to me and I'm glad for anyone who enjoyed this. Thanks again! :)


End file.

Gundam Wing/AC, Drama