Harry Potter 1. The First Chapter

23 Sided Love Triangle  
  
By Arianna and Kim  
  
NEVER TELL DAN, RICK, AMANDA, OR JEN ABOUT THIS STORY, BECAUSE THEY WILL KILL US, AND WE DON'T WANT TO DIE SLOW, PAINFUL, HORIBBLE DEATHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
A/N And Disclaimer: This is the product of watching the same scene of Aladdin for three hours. Yes, it comes out in a slashy Harry Potter fic. And don't mind the age changes. Its our story, and we can do whatever we want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! WE OWN EVERYTHING!!!! Actually, we only own Kim, Arianna, Jen, Rick, Amanda, and Dan. Yes, Dan, we own you. And the rest of the stuff belongs to the writing goddess J.K. Rowling. And the publishers. And Warner Bros.  
  
Read Kim's other stories! Her username is: Gryffindorhobbit  
  
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Chapter 1  
  
On the 5th of September, two 15 year old girls, Kim and Arianna, appeared in the magical world of Hogwarts, very confused. But it seemed as if the Hogwarts students had known them for a long time. They soon started classes. On the 6th of September, Rick, Dan, Amanda and Jen appeared in the magical world of Hogwarts. Dan looked around and said, "Oh, God. Not again." They also started classes.  
  
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"Um...Kim...erm...um...will you go out with me? Oh god. That sounds horrible." Harry stood in front of the mirror in the 5th year boys' dormitory, practicing asking Kim out, and failing miserably. Little did he know that Pansy Parkinson watched from under his bed with a very malicious expression on her pug- like face. Not for Harry, but for his love, Kim. She was distraught that her one and only love was in love with some "slutty" Gryffindor! Pansy laughed a malicious laugh. "I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!"  
  
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Two 6th years, Fred and George sat in the Gryffindor common room, lamenting over their horrible attempts to ask their crushes out. Fred had managed to get whipped cream all over his face while trying to ask Alicia out and George had accidentally set Angelina on fire. Kim tiptoed over behind George, and put her hands in front of his eyes, shouting, "Guess who?"  
  
"Kim, get your bloody hands off my eyes. I've had a really bad day." George sighed exasperatedly. Kim, a little disappointed, removed her hands from his eyes, and set herself down next to him on the couch.  
  
"What happened? Why was it so bad?" Kim put her head on George's shoulder.  
  
"I set Angelina on fire. Not saying anything else."  
  
"Oh."  
  
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On the Quidditch pitch, Oliver, Katie, Alicia, and Angelina were practicing their Quidditch skills, with Lee Jordan practicing his commenting skills.  
  
"Oh my god, you guys. George set me on fire today during Herbology!" said Angelina.  
  
"How did he manage that? We don't even use wands in Herbology!" said Alicia.  
  
"You'd be surprised what he can do without a wand."  
  
"If you would kindly stop gossiping, then we could actually practice today." Cut in Oliver, taking a break in his relentless Katie, which wasn't really working, as she spent all her time talking to Oliver staring at Lee, who wasn't giving her any attention. In fact, he was thinking only of his deepest desire, Ginny Weasley. "And so as I was saying," said Oliver, "I think that orange is so not the new pink."  
  
"Uh huh, whatever you say Oliver..." Katie mused, still staring at Lee's gorgeous dreadlocks.  
  
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It was the day of the first Hogsmead vacation and Rick was very excited. Dan had unknowingly agreed to go to a club with Rick. He had been daydreaming about his love, Amanda. Little did Dan know, that it was a gay club, called Senor Miguel's Pixi House. Hagrid was excited too. He had found out that Rick was going to Senor Miguel's Pixi House which he visited frequently. Not to mention that he could get away from Snape, who had taken to following him around. He had seen his diary, and had found a disturbing entry, where Snape had confessed his love for him. And he really wanted to see Rick. He knew it was wrong, but Rick was just so irresistible... He wondered why most of the school thought he was a bit eccentric. Er... Actually they thought him to be, how can we put this nicely, oh yes, a freak. When Rick and Dan arrived at Senor Miguel's, Dan was a bit surprised to see a man, Dumbledore, in a large puffy pink gown singing karaoke to Britney Spears.  
  
"Uh, Rick, where are we?" Dan asked very apprehensively.  
  
"We're at Senor Miguel's Pixi House!" Rick shouted happily.  
  
"Senor what?" Dan's mouth hung open.  
  
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"Ginny, you know that you could have almost any boy in this school, don't you? Hell, Lee Jordan is totally in love with you! Why do you have to go for the one boy you can't have? He hates you!" Hermione and Ginny were arguing about their choices in men.  
"Because of how he is! His cold mannerisms that just make you want to reach out and kiss him, bring a little warmth into his life. His blond hair... not enough people at Hogwarts have blond hair! And not to mention the fact that he's bloody GORGEOUS! And I don't think much of your taste in men. Even if he wasn't my brother, I would NEVER go out with someone as stupid as him!"  
  
"First of all, I'm not going out with him—"  
  
"You wish you were..."  
  
"—And second, he's not that stupid..."  
  
"Do you live with him?"  
  
"No, but—"  
  
"Then trust me on this. He's stupid."  
  
"Whatever. Each to her own."  
  
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Outside the girl's privy, Amanda waited for her secret crush to come out. She was trying not to get found by her stalker, Dan. Meanwhile, inside the privy, Jen was inside fixing her hair for her love, Seamus Finnegan. She wanted him paying more attention to her, than he did that Arianna girl. She didn't like Arianna very much. But luckily, Arianna wasn't interested in Seamus. Arianna was secretly in love with Neville Longbottom. She really wished that he would ask her out. She knew he had the guts, and she was sure that no one else liked him and would get in her way of their relationship, but she was wrong. Neville had fallen head over heels for the Slytherin, Pansy Parkinson.  
  
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Meanwhile, in the dungeons, Ron sat in detention. He had "accidentally" blown up Malfoy's cauldron during potions. If you ever decide to do that, don't. Thought Ron. So now he was sitting in the potions classroom, cleaning cauldrons. By hand. He thought he ought to do something to stop Snape's tyranny. So while sitting there, he decide that from now on, he would take any opportunity to annoy Snape.  
  
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	2. The Next Chapter

A/N: Helloooo reader! Help us! We've been kidnapped by Saddam Hussein!  
  
Disclaimer: We don't own any of the HP PEEEEEPPPPSSSSSssssssssssssssssss. But we own RIck. Just RICk. Yes RICK. We own you.  
  
A/N2: Aladdin is making out with jasmine on my basement couch... make it stop. And now, finally, the story!  
  
Harry raced out of his dormitory into the common room, and out of the portrait hole to go to Hogsmeade. Pansy followed. She tiptoed out of the door without being noticed. Harry was still mumbling to himself trying to figure out yet another way to ask out his love, Kim. Soon after Pansy and Harry had left, Kim left too. She caught up to Harry halfway to the Great Hall.  
  
"Hey!" she said to him.  
  
Harry just stood there dumbfounded with his mouth hanging open.  
  
"Are you going to Hogsmeade too?"  
  
Silence.  
  
"I'll take that as a yes?"  
  
"..."  
  
Pansy walked up behind Kim with her wand raised. Kim turned around and screamed, "FLUFFERNUTTER!" and ran away.  
  
Harry sighed. "I love her," and with that he skipped away down the stairs humming a song.  
  
As Dumbledore began a Michael Jackson song, "Thriller," Rick was restraining Dan from running out of the club.  
  
"Want something to eat, Hun?" Rick asked Dan lovingly.  
  
Dan just glared at Rick as the sat down at a café table. Rick got up to get something to eat and Dan was just about to leave, when Hagrid sat down next to Rick's chair and nearly broke it.  
  
"Hullo thar," Hagrid announced to Dan. Dan ignored him.  
  
"Julian Fries all around!" Rick shouted and then he stopped. He saw Hagrid sitting there and was almost about to scream when Hagrid handed him a bouquet of marigolds.  
  
"Erm... Rick... would you..." but he was cut off.  
  
"What the hell is going on here?" shouted Dan.  
  
"I just wanted to...er..." Hagrid started, but Rick cut in.  
  
"Hagrid, I've told you a million times. I have a new boyfriend now. You know that."  
  
"You have a what?" Dan asked.  
  
"I was going to..."  
  
"That's it. I'm outtie." And Dan left, leaving Rick and Hagrid to pay the bill.  
  
After Pansy had stalked Kim for a while, she decided to go stalk someone easier. Neville. She found him staring into his potions cauldron, wondering whether he should jump in or not.  
  
"Hellooooo, Neville..." Neville looked up at Pansy.  
  
"My lady!" He shouted.  
  
"I thought I'd find you here..." she smirked.  
  
"My darling temptress! My little love bug! Have you come to marry me and whisk me away to Neverland on your White Horse of Doom?"  
  
"...Yes... yes I have..."  
  
"Really?!?!?!"  
  
"No."  
  



End file.

Harry Potter, Humor, Romance