Home & Away 1. Chapter 1

Abandoned that basically sums up my whole life.

I have been left behind, put to the back of peoples minds. push away from any sort of normal family.

kept inside a system where I am more of a number than a person.

I have lived in many places with many different people.

its been a fun life.

I do love sharing a room with six other people, it keeps life exciting not knowing if you are going to get a bed that night.

I was given away as a baby like a cheap prize on a raffle unfortunately no one ever came to claim me. no one wanted me then or now.

But I wouldn't say i'm bitter just slightly hateful of the people that gave me away

Now that i'm 18 though i'm ready to find the person that threw me away, let them now it was the wrong mistake for them to make.

Don't get me wrong i am excited about finding where I came from but i'm more interested in setting the record straight, getting some pay back for 18 years I floated around like a lost soul. I am not looking for some mother daughter bonding i'm looking for revenge.

Summer bay here I come, I think I'm going to have a lot of fun here.


	2. Chapter 2

Sumer bay what a sickly name. it makes it sound like the people that live here don't have a care in the world.

As if i'm entering a place where candy grows on trees and everybody skips to a happy melody. ohh I do hate this place.

I hold the address in my hands i've nearly burned a whole in the paper from where my gaze has just been transfixed.

I just stare at the words like a gormless idiot.

I don't know why i'm acting like this, like i care about meeting this woman. She ruined my life why am I nervous why do i even care, I am here to forget her, I want to get my own back not go out for a nice meal and share some motherly daughter moments. I've just got to snap myself out of this.

Remember my pain and how she caused it.

Why am I even sitting on this beach, I hate the beach. yes as you might have guessed I hate a lot of things i'm slightly angsty you could say.

But I genuinely do hate the beach, the sand its like dirty grit between your toes and then theres the fact I burn very easily. The beach is just stupid. I know that isn't very grown up but these are my thoughts and I can think what ever I want.

God i'm hungry. I wonder what the time is i feel like i've been sitting here for hours.

I check my slightly beaten up watch. I stole it and had to smash the security tag off it so that explains its slightly dishevelled state . But everybody has got to own something nice and i personally think paying for items is over rated.

6.45 its early. But i've always been an early riser I suppose moving around a lot does that to you, you are always prepared ready to leave at any moment.

Even though I have moved more times than i can remember I have never had a home to be comfortable in i have never wanted to stay or just sit in a place.

I have lived in empty shells of buildings not homes. They wasn't some where I felt safe or secure they were cream painted rooms with people inhabiting them they weren't homes.

Its time to move I haven't eaten in nearly a day and i'm ready to eat my own foot.

I stand up and dust the grit from off my clothes. I wonder where I can find a nice pleasant place to eat somewhere where local people can pry into my business.

I start walking, when I come across a place called the surf club how beachy and quaint.

I wonder in and quickly find a table in the corner I try not to catch any attention but i'm not so lucky. A old plump lady sees me. I can tell she smells gossip, and she quickly rushes over to collect my order. I haven't even had chance to put my legs under the table before she's right in my face smiling like a crazed maniac. I don't smile back.

" Hello I don't think I've seen you round here before, are you visiting family i may know them i'm a pillar in the local community i'll have you know."

The woman continued to rabbit on I honestly don't think she took a breath maybe she had gills or something that didn't require her to take a breath while talking.

"Coffee and bacon and eggs." I shout abruptly over her.

She stops talking and suddenly looks very upset " Thats my order" I ignore her looks.

She furiously writes on her pad then storms off. " How rude no respect that one" I hear her say to her self in a voice that is heard by mostly everybody in here.

What a rude person you must think I am, please don't tell my parents, I used that line a lot when I was in trouble. It didn't help me get out of any trouble though I normally ended up in more.

15 minutes latter the delightful old lady came back and lightly dropped my plate and coffee in front of me. I do love service with a smile.

After a good hour of relaxing and letting my eggs and bacon settle I get up to pay I approach the counter where i see that lovely older lady standing.

I place the money on the desk she looks at me then puts some number through a calculator, she then quickly takes the note and hands me my change from the till not saying a thing to me. But I can tell she's dieting to put me in my place. She hands me my change.

I was about to leave when something rushed over me like I wanted to give this woman some gossip for the day. Maybe I'm going soft in my old age or it may be the fact she cooks a mean egg and bacon. I walk back over to the counter I excuse my self and read out the address on my piece of paper " do you by any chance know where this is."

She looks at me and al the anger from before has seemed to have disappeared she now seems excited and gear. " Thats senior constable Bucktons address, she lives there with her partner, how do you know the senior constable are you a friend from the city" The woman s questions suddenly began firing out of her rapidly it felt like an attack of questions I guess this is what its like being on mastermind.

She stopped talking I didn't know if that was because she was having some kind of heart attack or she needed her inhaler. I took this as a my cue to answer her.

" I wouldn't say friend more an acquaintance i haven't seen in awhile." I t wasn't a lie but it wasn't exactly the truth.

The woman nodded " I could give her a ring for you let her know you are coming." I interjected quickly here

" no thats alright I want it to be a surprise." I slightly shouted the no startling her slightly.

" I better get going if I want to surprise her so bye…"

" Mrs Smart Collen Smart." She quickly stated.

" Ok then Bye mrs Smart." I give her a slight nod and fake smile before I exist. I feel relieved once I get outside that was extreme.

I start walking again back on my journey to find senior constable Buckton.

I quickly look in my bag to make sure its still there. It is to my relief the shiny metal object just staring up at me, unbeknown to the destruction it will help me to cause.

I pull a T-shirt over the item and gently push it to the bottom of my bag.

A smile gently creeps across my face.

ohh I do feel good about today.


	3. Chapter 3

Its now 8 o'clock I wonder if this is a decent time to ruin someones life.

I pull out my map just to check i'm on the right route, it would be very embracing if I turned up on someones doorstep and gave them this new and they turned out not to be the senior Buckton.

How should i introduce myself should I go for a nice mom its me your long lost daughter lets hug please. and then me would run along a felid of flowers till we reached each others open arms. Or should i be more mysterious leaving her cryptic messages on her doorstep, making her meet me in a secret location. where I slowly revel myself from the shadows.

MHHHHH what a hard choice I have on my hands.

Concentrate on the matter at hand I tell myself, I do have the slight habit of going off track and getting lost in my own thoughts.

I'm here for a reason not because I love the beach oh so much.

I walk along the street counting the numbers looking for my bingo moment. Every house looks the same, the same wooden paneling, the same little square of green grass. suburbia its weird I imagine there a lot of baking of pies and knitting that goes on here.

BINGO I see the house the one that matches the address on this piece of paper. I've travelled so far for this two coaches to be exact. And now I'm just starring at this clone suburban house. I've got to snap myself out of this.

I start to jump up and down a few times like i'm going to enter a boxing ring. I need to psych myself up for this. I feel the adrenaline pumping through my body. I don't know if i'm nervous or excited at the prospect of getting my own back.

I just want to end this tie I have with her.

Your ready Ruby your ready come on you can do this. I chant this in my head I feel like i'm going into the fight of my life.

Ok i'm READY I put on my best determined walk, and stride straight up to the door.

I reach out fist clenched I knock.

Then I wait, I place my hand in the bag feeling around for the object. I have it in my grasp.

I keep my hand in my bag and wait for the door to open.


	4. Chapter 4

I stand here for what seems like an eternity have i knocked hard enough maybe they didn't hear this seems like a pretty solid wooden door. Its always good to invest in a sturdy door. Waiting is just making me more nervous.

My hand in my bag is now starting to sweat and i'm loosing my once firm grip on the object.

I close my eyes and go to knock the door again this time ill give it a proper knock.

Suddenly the door swings open my arm is still reached out i am shocked at the pace the door has opened.

A young but older than myself woman stands before me her hair a mess. bed head. I think I woke her up how rude of me.

I just stare for a few seconds I know my mother was a young mother but I don't thinks she's this young. But she may have aged well who am I to judge. I take a step back to check the number of the house. Yes its the right number.

I tighten my grip on the object in my bag.

But before I do anything silly its worth checking that i am at the right house, People move all the time and I would look incredibly silly if I killed the wrong woman.

I wouldn't want to do that now, would I.

I Suddenly realise how long I have been standing there silently, and quickly smile to reassure her.

She looks at me expectantly and since I have lost the power of speech she starts to talk. " We already give to charity so we are not really interested" The woman says half asleep.

I snap my self out of my trance and interrupt her " No thats not my i'm here I'm looking for a charlotte Buckton." I feel my hand tighten on the gun i'm ready this is it I'm ready i've been waiting for this moment all my life.

I begin to slowly pull the gun out ready for her answer.

" ohhh charlie yes she lives here but she isn't in at the moment, I think she went for an early morning run." the woman tells me her in sleepy state.

Shit I let go of the gun in my bag and pull my hand out, I wipe my sweating hand my jeans and mentally kick myself. I thought it was her I was ready to shoot I was soooo ready.

" ok then." I say very disappointedly I turn to walk away when the woman stops me.

" Are you a friend from the city you should come in and wait she wont be very long." She doesn't leave a gap for me to tell her who I really am but I think the surprise can wait till charlie returns home.

I turn around flashing her one of my prize winning smiles " Thanks, I would love to wait."

She leads me into the kitchen " I'm just going to go and get changed i'll be back in a minute."

"Cool" i say back to her.

Once she has left I shake my head at the pure foolishness of her just welcoming me in, people in the country are so naive. I then turn my attention to the pictures stuck up onto the fridge.

One in particular catches my eye, it seems to be a wedding with the woman who let me in and another woman, she didn't look like a lesbian I thought to myself how interesting.

The two women looked unbearably happy, smiling stupidly into each others eyes.

How sickening I hate weddings, its just all down hill from that day no one is that happy for ever.

I was still looking when I felt a hand pat me on the shoulder I turned around to see the woman who had let me in. she was now changed with her hair unmated. she to then looked at the picture.

" Charlie and me on our wedding day it was one of the happiest days of my life." she says mindlessly as if she is in some sort of a daydream remembering the day itself.

I realise what she has just said she said that name Charile, my so called mother is a lesbian married to what looks like a school girl.

I want to laugh, fucking hell I don't believe that woman. I didn't have a family or home but this woman who destroyed my life has got a new family and a wife. This is not right I could feel the anger boiling up inside me. I couldn't control it

I couldn't control myself.

I reached for the gun in my bag pulling it out so quickly the woman didn't know what was happening.


	5. Chapter 5

My anger just took over it was like I was a by stander just watching myself do this. I was no longer in control

I pulled out the gun she didn't see it coming then I just hit, hit her over the head. Just whacked her. And she fell, dropped to the floor like a puppet who's strings had been cut.

She just lay there I was sure I hadn't killed her I think I hadn't killed her. I'm not a doctor I don't know if she's alive.

Come on pull your self together.

it wasn't meant to happen this way, I didn't want to hurt anyone that didn't need to be hurt.

I was just so angry when I saw that picture I just lost it. I cant just keep standing here I have to do something quick.

"Fuck fuccccck fuck" I scream

I bend down and pick up the woman's feet I begin to drag her into the next room. She's surprisingly heavy. I struggle to push her onto the sofa. Quickly I check if theres a pulse.

Thank god there is.

I begin to pace up and down in front of the still deadly quite body. should I leave, should I try and convince her she just fell. No I cant leave I have come so far I have to see this through. Yes this is not how I thought it would happen but it's ok I can recover from this I still have the gun she's not going to challenge me with the gun in my hand.

Suddenly the woman started to stir I pull the gun out of the jeans and just point it had her.

She begins to sit up rubbing her eyes, she still hasn't seen me, rubbing her head she winces in pain. Then she sees me the barrel of the gun just pointing at her. she pushes back on the sofa.

I think she's scared.

" Just take anything you want please take what ever you want." she shakily tells me.

I don't respond i'm thinking about my next move.

she continues to talk " please just take what you need theres money in the drawer over there, my wife is a police officer she will be back any minute."

I rub my own head in frustration.

" STOP just shut the fuck up i'm not here because I fancy a new look and need some jewellery i'm here because….." I cant finish the sentence it makes me to angry I feel my grip tighten on the gun.

she looks at me confused still waiting for the end of the sentence but I don't say anymore I just keep my stone like stance with the gun aimed to fire.

" Why are you here then" she shouts in frustration.

I roll my eyes at her and quickly reach into my pocket, I pull out a folded up piece of paper and throw it onto the sofa.

she nervously reaches for the paper not wanting to take her eyes off me. she begins to open it reading, studying every word thats written.

she looks shocked like she has made a life changing realisation but yet she asks me a stupid question.

" What is this?" she stutters out.

" Well it looks to me like a birth certificate." I say in that mocking tone that I have

she just ignores my comment " I don't understand it says that….."

She doesn't get to finish that sentence before the door opens and a voice from the kitchen calls through the house " sorry I took so long I had to stop by the station, but I did bring us some breakie back."

" joey" the voice called out again when she didn't get an answer.

I press my finger to my lips and look at Joey I then put the gun behind my back. Ready for when she enters.


	6. Chapter 6

"Joey" The voice from the kitchen shouts out again

I keep my gaze on Joey and I give her a nod she knows to stay quite.

Still no answer the woman left the kitchen to find her obviously deaf wife.

I hear her foot steps approaching she enters the room but doesn't see me at first " there you are didn't you hear me calling you."

Joey doesn't answer her again but her face shows how she feels. Charlie didn't understand why her wife was no responsive.

" Whats going on…." she doesn't get to finish that sentence because she has finally noticed my presence . Its nice to be noticed

She looks at me then looks at Joey. I don't give her a chance to say anything else I pull the gun from behind my back and motion for her to sit next to her wife.

I feel a wave of calmness come over me, like i'm going to be able to finally eradicate this pain.

She turns to Joey "Whats going on Joey" she whispers grabbing her wife's hand frightened and confused at what was happening. Joey pulled her hand out of charlie's grasp and turned her body away, angry at her wife's betrayal.

I smile at this " so… I'm guessing you want me to tell her joey." I say in delight of the rift that I have caused

Charlie now turns to look at me I don't think she has guessed the surprise yet.

"Tell me WHAT, tell me that you thought taking a police officer and innocent hostage would be a good idea." the rage in her voice now apparent.

I laugh at this I really cant believe she hasn't worked this out yet. I even think I have her eyes the similarities between us are uncanny.

" Joey would you be a dear and pass your wife the certificate." I say in the nicest tone that I could muster.

Joey doesn't even look at me she is still lost somewhere in her own mind.

" NOW I haven't got all day." I shout startling the young woman.

she turns towards her wife and mindlessly drops the paper onto her lap.

Charlie eagerly picks up the paper and unfolds it. It was still warm from where joey had held it firm in her hands.

I hear her choke on her own intake of breath as she slowly realises who I am. I watch as her world slowly tumbles around her, her lies and mistakes coming back to haunt her.

" I..I…I…don't understand." I hear her choke out.

maybe she isn't my mother she doesn't seem that smart she really isn't catching on as fast as I had hoped I'll help her out a little it can be her last request.

" well 18 years ago you got pregnant and had a baby then you left that baby for the state to treat like an nameless object, to be moved and pushed about then that baby grew up bitter and angry and swore that she would come and find thou thats you charlie and make them pay for the misery I have endured. so Tadahhhhh here I am and i'm ready to make you pay. I said this in the most mocking and patronising tone I could muster.

She just looked at me tears in her eyes her face had palled and see looked quite sick. The silence was getting to me was she really not going to say something make an excuse at least defend her actions. The silence was making me more nervous more anxious. I didn't want to feel sorry for this woman. I wouldn't let her emotions affect me. I needed to do something take action. I've been here to long, it needs to end now.

I raise my gun and point it at her, she doesn't even flinch like she has excepted what is going to happen next.

I begin to squeeze the trigger.


	7. Chapter 7

I begin to squeeze the trigger I feel my finger pulling ever so gently, i'm ready to guide the missile into its desired body, i'm ready for it to cause it's destruction and pain.

"**STOP**" I hear a voice boom " Just stop" the voice practically whispers as it continues to talk.

Joey who is now standing has finally woken up, she has shook off the shock that had intrenched her minutes earlier.

Charlie is still lost her emotion and sorrow controlling her. unaware of the grief she has caused the betrayal and the lies she has told

I lower my gun and turn to the younger woman. Does she not understand this situation I have the gun I am in control here I call the shot I will decided when it's over when I will stop.

"Why should I, this woman has lied to you she has ruined my life she deserves to pay."

She lied to Joey to I thought she would understand how can she not see my point of view.

" But not to die, yes she has made mistakes and hurt us but she doesn't deserve to die, she's a good person, and if your her daughter then at heart you are a good person just please listen to me." I knew what she was trying to do appeal to my compassionate side talk me out of my vengeance. I was beginning to loose my cool and temper with the younger woman.

"Shut up you don't know me, and I maybe blood related to her but she means nothing to me." I raise the gun again my anger boiling at the words she has just uttered daughter HA I want nothing to do with that woman, i'm nothing to her and she's nothing to me.

" I know you are angry and want her to pay for what has happened to you, but could you really live with yourself you killed another person your angry but could you really live with the guilt, do you really think that she wanted your life to end up like this please lets just talk about this." Joey practically begged.

I don't believe she has got me doubting myself I was pumped up I was ready. But now I don't know what to do i'm so angry but maybes she's right, but I don't want her to be right. This woman threw me away. I hate her. I don't know what to do, I cant turn back now i've started this I need to finish this.

I look at joey then turn to her she's still staring at the certificate I raise the gun again.

I close my eyes and try to will my hands to squeeze the trigger.

"i'm not a killer." I whisper

I drop the gun.

I hear joey let out the breath she has been holding onto.

Idiot thats what I am I lost my nerve I don't know what to do now but I know I have to get out of here as fast I can. I quickly leave grabbing my bag from the kitchen. I start to run I need to get away from that house and that woman. As I run I can feel a few stray tears run down my cheek I tried to keep them in but as I run they begin to flow until they completely cover my vision and stain my face.

I stop running and wipe my eyes quickly with my sleeve, I need a drink.


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you for the reviews

A drink where the hell can you get a drink in this stupid town.

I need a drink, does no one drink here because there just seems that there is an abundance of surf shops.

God I hate the country if there isn't cattle and sheep everywhere you look theres a Goddamn surf shop.

Finally I see somewhere, hopefully I can get a drink in peace.

The silence in the room was almost deafening both women just confused at what had just happened. Angry at the lies and the mistrust.

Joey walked to the gun on the floor slowly bending down she picked it up, the weight of the gun nearly making it slip from her hand.

she stood back up walking over to the coffee table she slammed the gun down, causing Charlie to jump and look at her tears still fresh in her eyes.

Joey just shook her head in disgust and began to exist the room.

Charlie finally rose from her seat an imprint nearly being left in the space.

"Joey wait" she croaked

The younger woman didn't even flinch and carried on walking.

charlie quickened her pace reaching out and grabbing her wife s arm.

"Joey stop" she pleaded

she finally stopped at the touch of the other woman turning round to face her.

"you lied to me, you just lied to my face." joey stated her voice full of contempt for the other woman.

"joey its not like that please just let me explain." charlie cried tightening her grip on Joeys arm, as if she was hanging on for dear life.

" You have a daughter charlie your a mother, you have a child thats so angry at you she wants to kill you." she paused taking a breath making sure her anger didn't get the better of her.

" i'm your wife and best friend I love you I said that what ever life would throw at us I would understand and forgive you, but charlie I don't think I can forgive you and I certainly cant understand how you could lie to me."

Joey then waved off her wife's hand and left.

" Joey please" charlie screamed after her "Please just let me explain" her voice wailed trailing off in a wave of sobs.

I tightly grip the bottle in my hands and stumbled down onto the beach collapsing onto the sand. I feel exhausted who knew taking people hostage could be so draining.

I move my bag and place it behind my head and lean back slowly sipping from the bottle wrapped in the brown bag. I must look like a homeless tramp but I think i'm working it quite well.

My anger seems to fade away with every sip. And I begin to enjoy the sound of the ocean. I must be really drunk if i'm beginning to like the beach.

I finally close my eyes, but then I here footsteps approaching I swear if its the cops wanting me to move on i'm not in the mood.

I sit up squinting my eyes trying to work out who is the approaching figure in the darkness. Then as it got nearer I recognised who it is.

I jumped or stumbled onto my feet and strode over to the figure and before they even saw it coming I unleashed my fist striking there cheek causing them to fall to the floor clutching there face.


	9. Chapter 9

" Shit your face is like a brick." I shout as I shake my hand trying to rid the pain from my hand.

" I guess you are still a bit angry at me for not letting you shoot your mother." Joey says as she wipes the blood from her lips.

"slightly" I say as I bend down and put my arm out , Joey grabs it and I help pull her off of the floor.

once she's on her feet I let go of her arm and turn around and walk back to my bag.I lye back down and grab the bottle from the sand. The woman walks over to where I am and sits her self next to me. I pass the bottle over, she accepts and starts to drink her face cringing as the liquid slithers down her throat. She then passes the bottle back.

" Not with wifey then." I spit as I take another swig from the bottle, and then pass it over.

Joey takes a drink out of the bottle before answering " No we had an argument."

I don't say anything and just keep my gaze on the sea and how it roles back and forth slowly getting closer.

I drown the last of the liquid in the bottle then drop it onto the sand. I shakily stand up and grab my bag.

"Leaving then." Joey questions through the darkness.

"Theres nothing here for me." I state as I start to walk back down the beach.

I keep walking along the beach until I see a bright orange van. Its mostly orange because of the rust incasing it. I walk up to it and throw my bag on the bonnet as I fumble in my pockets for my keys.

Please tell me I haven't dropped them.

I start fiercely looking in every pocket hoping beyond hope I haven't dropped the keys. Then as I put my hand in my back pocket I finally feel them and pull the keys out triumphantly.

I shove the key in the door forcefully twist it then kick the door. I here a little pop and the door squeaks open. I grab my bag off the bonnet and throw it onto the passenger seat I oh so very lady like clamber in and start the engine.

I then hear my phone rhythmically start to vibrate on the dashboard. I ignore it and begin to check my mirrors when it starts to vibrate again. my God can I not get any privacy. I turn off the engine and grab the phone.

"what." I shout down the phone in my politest tone.

"Where are you?" the voice asks

"i'm at the seaside." I say in my usual sarcastic voice."But don't worry I don't plan on moving here."

" no….. you cant come back not just yet, danny has a job for you."

I practically laugh at what was just said " Look I told you i'm out, I don't owe you or danny anything."

"OHH but you do remember what we did for you." the voice whispered knowing full well that he had got my attention now.

That sentence made my blood boil.

"Fuck you i've paid that debt." I screamed, I wasn't in the mood to listen to anymore of this.

"Look jessie I don't want to have to do this as we are like family, but do you want the truth of what you did to come out for everybody to know that you are….."

I stop him before he can say anymore I cant stand to hear the word that comes out of his mouth next. " Stop." I shout at the voice before he finishes the sentence. " Fine i'll do what ever you want but this is the last time." I say defeated.

"I knew you wouldn't let family down." the voice purrs.


End file.

Home & Away, Angst, Hurt-Comfort