1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is an AU story I guess it would be classified as I'm not really sure. It will tell the story of Kensi's past life and how her and Deeks path crossed before they ever met at NCIS. This is a Densi story eventually but this story will mainly be focused on Kensi and what happened to her after her father's death, how it changed her, and why she became the person she is today. I decided to write this story because as of lately I have been reading a lot of people hating on Kensi and its driving me nuts. Ok sorry for the rant. Hope you enjoy! **

They say your destiny is already written. Destiny is not a chance, it's a choice. Every choice we make, everything we do or don't do. Everybody we love, everybody that breaks our hearts, everything, it happens for a reason. A reason that at the time maybe unknown to us, but in the end we will know that reason, and our destiny will be revealed.

"Kensi, are you here?" Her father called out to her. There was no response. Donald already knew with out a doubt where she was, if she wasn't in her room, she was in her favorite place in the world.

He turned ,and headed out the front door that he had just came in only moments before. This time he headed around the back of the house, and towards the lake that bordered the backside of their property. It was beautiful here this time of year. It was the time right at the end of the summer when change was in the air. You could feel it, you could smell it, hell you could even taste if you tried hard enough. The lake was Kensi favorite place to escape to, whenever she was sad, or angry, or confused, this is where she would go to figure things out.

"I don't want to talk about." Kensi said as she heard her father's approaching footsteps.

"Don't want to talk about what?" He asked, as he sat down on the ground beside his daughter.

Kensi had her back propped up against the tree, she sat with her knees to her chest, and both arms wrapped around her knees.

"Whatever it is you came down here to talk to me about." She said as she turned to look at her father.

"I just wanted to know how your first day at school went?" He questioned.

"Just like all the others first days, at all the other schools." She explained.

"It went that good uh?" He joked.

"Anyone ever tell you that your since of humor sucks dad."

"Your mother always did. What went wrong this time Kensi?" He questioned.

"People, people are what went wrong." She said harshly. "I don't fit in anywhere. The girls are to whiny and the boys are asses." She explained to her father.

Donald laughed, "The boys are only asses cause they know you could beat them up." He said nudging his daughter's shoulder with his own. "And the girls, well… Ok I have got nothing there." Her dad replied.

"I don't belong anywhere dad. I'm just a broken mess, that gets moved around from place to place. I have no friends, no family besides you. Your all I have." Kensi said sadly.

He reached over wrapping his arm around Kensi's shoulder, "You know what they say about being broken Kensi?" He asked.

"No, but I have a feeling you're about to tell me."

"The most beautiful things are the easiest to break." Donald explained.

"Thanks dad. I think." She laughed.

"Come on, lets go get something to eat I am starving." Donald said, standing up from his position on the ground he reached his hand down to Kensi.

"Sounds good to me." She said taking his outstretched hand.

"What do you want for dinner?" He asked as they made their way back towards the house.

"I don't care as long as I don't have to cook."

"Cook are you crazy? I would never make you cook. Besides we just moved here I'd like to have a house left for a little while longer."

"Dad!" Kensi said.

"What? I cant help you take your cooking skills after your mother. Thank God you got your looks from me." Donald explained.

"Yes, lets thank God for that." Kensi said rolling her eyes to her dad, "I will beat you to the house." Kensi said right before she took off running.

"No fair! You cheated!" Donald called out his daughter.

**A/N: So this is the first chapter just trying establish the relationship with Kensi and her dad. What do you think? Thoughts, ideas, suggestions? I would love to hear them all. **


	2. Chapter 2

Kensi sat on the kitchen counter eating a slice of pizza, swinging her legs back and forth happily. She watched out the kitchen window above the sink, as the sky was illuminated with the orange glow of the setting sun. She was so caught up in her thoughts she was completely unaware of her father's presence until he spoke to her.

"Really Kensi?" Her father asked entering the kitchen.

"What? You said you didn't care what we had for dinner." Kensi said defending her choice of Pizza.

"Not the food. The manners. Get your butt off the counter." Her father explained.

"I…"

"Tables and chairs were invented for a reason. I suggested you rediscover that reason."

"Yes sir." Kensi said as she jumped down from her position on the counter.

"Thank you baby girl." Her father replied.

Kensi grabbed the box of Pizza and proceeded to the table with the rest of their dinner. Donald walked over joining his daughter at the table. He reached over removing a slice of Pizza from its delivery box.

"I swear sometimes this is all you eat child." Her father said.

"I like other things." She said, as she shoved the last bite of pizza in her mouth.

"Kensi, we have ate pizza three times in the last eight days." He explained trying to make his point to her evident.

"It's not my fault that this place is lacking in take out options. Maybe if we weren't in the middle of nowhere this wouldn't be a problem." She shot back. Kensi stood from the table gathering the empty pizza box to dispose of it. Once she had dropped the box into the garbage, she turned to face her father. Kensi stood with her back propped up against the refrigerator and her arms crossed over her chest, she was challenging him to say something back to her.

"It wont be forever Kensi. In a short time we will be headed to California and your options will be running over with acceptable take out places I promise. Until then try and enjoy yourself. Do you know how many girls your age would kill to live here?"

"I am not most girls dad." Kensi replied.

"You are defiantly not. You're one of a kind and don't you ever forget that."

"Before, you get all mushy on me again, I'm headed out for a while is that cool?" Kensi asked. Kensi sat back down in the chair at the kitchen table, pulling her boots on her feet, as she waited for her father's response.

"Where are you going?" Her dad asked.

"For a ride. I will be back in a few hours." Kensi explained.

"You know he still doesn't like me." Donald explained.

Kensi laughed, "Its not his fault you scare him every time you're around. You have to learn to be calmer, he is very laid back dad." Kensi explained.

Donald stood up from his chair and walked around the other side of the table to meet Kensi. When he was face to face with his daughter, he put both hands on her shoulders, "I will try to remember that. Have fun. I want you back in two hours." Her father said. Kensi nodded her head in agreement. Donald smiled then leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.

"Get out of here, and tell Romeo I said hi." Her father said.

Kensi rolled her eyes at her dad, "Whatever." She said. Kensi grabbed her jacket off the hook by the door, and bolted outside to meet him.

It took her only about ten minuets to get where she was going on foot. When she reached the entrance of the building she slipped inside quietly so she did not startle him. Slowly, she walked towards him. He must have heard her approaching footsteps because just a few seconds later he lifted his head and turned in her direction. Kensi walked over to him with a smile starting to form on her lips.

"Hi." She whispered as she moved in closer to him. She reached out and ran her fingers through his sandy blonde hair. God, he really loved it when she did that to him. Kensi leaned over and pressed a kiss to his nose.

"Dad says hi Romeo." Kensi said to her horse. "You ready to ride?" She asked, as she started gathering all the things she needed to saddle this beautiful creature.

"Sorry, we haven't been out for a few days." Kensi said to her horse as she slipped the bridal over his face. "Things have been crazy, obviously. Crazy enough that I am here talking to you." Kensi grabbed the blanket laying it over Romeo, then tossed the saddle on top of it. She pulled the girth around Romeo's belly to make sure the saddle would stay in place properly. When Kensi was satisfied that they were geared up and ready she led Romeo out of the stables. Once they were out in the opening, Kensi put her foot in the stirrup and used her upper body strength to pull herself up and mount her horse.

"Lets do this boy." She said to Romeo as she tugged gently at his reins and led him in the direction she wanted to proceed in.

Kensi led her horse over the rugged path near the wooded trail she had planned on taking. Kensi had always loved ridding her horse, it gave her time to think, time to be free, time to be anything but who she was. It didn't matter that no one was around, she actually liked it better that way. Besides for her father there weren't to many people in this world that Kensi actually wanted to be around these days. Everyone always had away of disappointing her or abandoning her when she needed them the most. Her mother was a perfect example of this.

The warm air of summer's end felt wonderful against her face, as she trotted Romeo on the trail. After she was satisfied that her horse's muscles had been warmed up properly, she opened him up into a full on gallop into the open wilderness of the desolate woods.

"That's it boy. Come on." She encouraged her horse.

Something about being on Romeo was intoxicating to her. She didn't know if it was the feel of the wind blowing through her hair, or the pounding of her heart that met the beat of her horses gallop every time his feet reconnected with the earth below. Whatever it was, it was freedom. It was perfect. Once they had completed their run, Kensi, pulled on the reins slowing her horse down into a walk.

"Good job boy." Kensi replied as she reached down and patted his neck. "We make a good team." Kensi said to Romeo, as they continued their walk to cool the horse down.

Kensi let her mind wonder over the current situation that was her life. She hated getting moved around from place to place so often, it never gave her the chance to fit in, to find a place in the world. At least she got to stay with her father, this was definitely worth the cost of being moved around all the time.

Kensi dismounted the horse, and walked by his side the rest of the way to the stables. She tethered the horse to the fence post so she could take all Romeo's gear off. She removed his saddle first placing it on the near by fence. She returned to Romeo to remove his blanket that was now soaked in swet from their trail ride. Kensi turned chunking the blanket in the direction of the fence, it missed the post where the saddle rested and fell on the ground just beneath it.

"Ready, to be set free?" Kensi asked as she moved around to the side of the horse's head. She reached around his neck and unfastened his bridal, slipping it down his slim narrow face. "Enjoy the rest of your day boy." Kensi said as she opened the swinging silver gate to let Romeo out into the pasture.

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who is reading this story and sticking with me at my first attempt at an AU fic. The story will pick up in the next few chapters, I apologize to all of you who think its moving to slow. I have to established the relationship with Kensi and her father or otherwise the story will not make since further down the line. Please tell me what you think. If anyone has any ideas or suggestion feel free to let me know I would love to hear them all. **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you for everyone who has been reading and reviewing I appreciate it. As always I want to hear your thoughts. **

By the time Kensi had made it back to the house, the bottom seemed to fall out from the sky and all the rain humanly imaginable began to fall. "Perfect." She mumbled to herself. She removed her black ridding boots by the front door, as they were now covered in mud thanks to the temperamental weather of this time of year.

"Kensi? Is that you?" Her father called from the living room when he heard the front door click shut.

"Last time I checked we were the only ones who lived here dad." Kensi said entering the living room. She removed her jacket, laying it over the back of the couch, before she sat down.

"Damn, I forgot to tell you I moved have the town in while you were out."

"Ha ha. Your hilarious dad." Kensi turned her attention to the tv trying to figure out what movie it was her father was currently watching.

"What are you watching?" Kensi asked.

"Nothing, just some horror film that was on. Nothing good on at the moment." Her father explained.

"OK. I'm going to take a shower." Kensi said, as she stood up from the couch. Just before she had made it three stairs up the phone started ringing. "I will get it dad." Kensi replied, and then took off running up the remaining stairs.

Once Kensi made it to her room, she dived on her bed stomach first trying to catch the phone before the caller hung up.

"Hello." Kensi said.

"Kensi, finally. Where were you?" Kate asked.

"Ridding." Kensi responds simply.

"God girl, we have got to get you a life. Anyways not the point. What are you doing tonight?" Kate questioned.

"Flying away to my private island, with my super hot 6'2, blonde hair, blue eyed male model." Kensi replied sarcastically.

"You have to learn better social skills sweetie. Anyways a group of us are going to the movies tonight. Come with us." Kate explained.

"Why?" Kensi questioned.

"Cause you need a life."

Kensi sighed, "Alright." She agreed.

"Perfect. See you then." Kate said before disconnecting the call.

"Ok." Kensi mumbled to herself before returning the phone to its proper place on her bed side table.

After her brief conversation with Kate, Kensi proceeded to take her shower like she had set out to do in the first place. Kensi was dreading asking for her father's permission to go out tonight with Kate. It wasn't that her father really minded her going out. In fact, most of the times Kensi got to do what she wanted, but something about Kate her father just didn't like. Maybe if she just asked his permission to go to the movie and not mention Kate, perhaps he would say yes, she thought to herself as she padded down the stairs.

When Kensi entered the living room her father was still sitting in his recliner. "Hey dad." Kensi said as she walked around beside him.

She pulled the towel from her head, and shook her hair free as she started to dry her hair casually.

"Can I go to the movies tonight?" Kensi asked.

"What are you going to see?"

"Titanic. I heard it was suppose to be amazing from some girls at school, now I am curious." She admitted.

"Who are you going with?" Her father asked.

"Dad, I just want to see a movie. I don't need to be interrogated."

That got Donald's attention quickly, he grabbed the remote to the tv, and muted it.

"Excuse me?"

"Dad, I just want to go see one movie. What is the big deal?"

"The big deal is I asked you a question and when I ask you a question I expect an answer. Now, we will try this again. Who are you going with?"

"Kate, invited me. There will be other girls from school there too. I don't know how many." She explained.

"No."

"Why?" Kensi whined.

"Kate is trouble. You're not going with her. You can wait till this weekend and I will take you to see whatever you want."

"Maybe I don't want to go with you." Kensi complained.

"I really don't care what you want. This isn't up for discussion Kensi. That girl is trouble."

"Dad." Kensi complained stomping her foot.

"Stop it right now. You are fifteen not six" Her father ordered.

"But.."

"No." Her father said firm.

"I…"

"Enough Kensi Marie Blye! This conversation is over."

"Fine." She shouted at him, before turning to run up the stairs. Once she reached her room, she slammed the door shut just to emphasize her anger with her father.

"_Every thought is a battle, every breath is a war"_

Donald looked at his watch, two hours and fifteen minuets it had been since his daughter stormed away angry with him. He couldn't stand this, he couldn't handle her being angry with him. Deciding it was best to go talk to her Donald made his way upstairs to Kensi's room. He stood outside her bedroom debating on what to do, on what to say to her. He hated being the bad guy, but he needed her to understand where he was coming from, he needed her to understand how much she meant to him. Ever since Kensi had chosen to leave her mother and stay with Donald, he became even more protective over her. Having Kensi raised on the different military bases around the world, made her turn out tough, it made her challenge the people around her. At first Donald hated the idea of seeing his little girl grow up to be one of the guys, but the older she got the less he seemed to worry. It was comforting to him to know his daughter could out and not have to worry about anyone bothering her.

"Kensi. Can I come in?" Her father asked from outside her bedroom door.

"It's your house you can do what you want." Kensi said bitterly.

He turned the door knob and entered her room. She was laying on her bed, with her back facing the door. She had her blanket pulled up encompassing her entire body. The only part of her visible was her head. He sighed, walking over he sat down on the foot of the bed.

"Kensi. I know your mad at me right now. One day you will understand." Donald said.

"Understand what?" She asked not bothering to look at him.

"What it means to love someone so much that you would do anything in this world to keep them safe, even it meant them hating you." He explained.

"No I wont."

"I promise you will, and when you do, remember this moment Kensi. I am going out for a little while with Peter and Jake, we will be back in a few hours. I'm locking up when I leave. Now, get some sleep, and we will have pancakes in the morning for breakfast." Her dad said patting her leg.

Kensi rolled over to her other side, so she could see her dad as he was turning to leave her room, "Hey dad."

"Yeah." He said.

"I love you." She replied.

"I love you too baby girl." Donald smiled, taking one last look at his daughter he turned and left her room.

The door to her room clicked softly. Kensi waited until she heard the front door shut, and her father's car leave the yard, before she through her covers back and climbed out of her bed. Going over to the closet Kensi grabbed her favorite pair of black jeans, and an emerald green tank top she had just bought last week that she has been dying to wear.

Kensi was not one of those girls who had to spend hours in front of a mirror before she could leave the house, she always preferred casual and laid back. She brushed through her hair opting to leave it down tonight, her final touch to her outfit, was a silver heart necklace and earring set her father gave her for Christmas, and her favorite pair of black boots. Taking one last glace at her reflection in the mirror, Kensi decided she was satisfied with her appearance.

She made her way over to her window, and unlocked it. Even though she was planning on leaving out the front door, she had to take this precaution incase her father made it home before she did. Once she was confident she had done everything she needed to do, she grabbed her purse off her desk, and made her way downstairs, and out the very same door her father left out of only ten minuets earlier.

Kensi turned and looked back at the house, she felt something was off, she just didn't know what. She just assumed it was because she was sneaking out for the first time and disobeying her father's direct order. It's crazy how day to day nothing ever seems to change, but when you look back on that one defying moment everything seems different then it was.


	4. Chapter 4

"_They say when you love someone your heart knows when you have truly lost them." _

"I promise I will never let go." Rose whispered to Jack.

Something about those words sent a cold chill through Kensi's entire body. She had never been one much for romantic movies. In all truth she preferred horror movies just like her father. Something about this movie just seemed to have her full attention. Kensi didn't know what it was, she couldn't pin point the commonality between it and her life, but something was there, something she wasn't seeing, but she was definitely feeling it.

Through out the last hour of the movie an uneasy feeling began to form in the pit of her stomach. Her mind began to drift away from the movie into an unknown place. She wasn't really thinking about anything, but at the same time she was thinking about everything. Watching the end of the movie, the pictures displayed from different points in time really got to her. That was her breaking point. Kensi didn't want to cry at no movie, she damn sure didn't want to cry in front of her friends, but her emotions took over. Lucky, for her the other girls were all a blubbering mess of tears too. Unlike the others girls Kensi didn't not cry for the movie, she cried for something else, something that was living deep inside of her and was eating her up. Something she didn't understand.

When the movie had ended the girls made their way out of the theater and onto the darkened streets of their small town.

"So where to now?" Claire asked the group.

"I have to get Kensi home before her dad, and mine notice we are missing, and she kills me." Kate explained to Claire.

"Yeah, she totally might like stab you or something." Claire said.

Kensi glared at the two girls, this is exactly why she hated going out with them, or anyone for that matter. Deciding to play along with their stupidity Kensi smirked, "I would never stab Kate. I would just shot her. Its less messy." Kensi said with a smile as she walked away from the girls.

Kate and Claire stood their side by side as they watched Kensi cross the street.

"I uh better go take her home." Kate said to Claire.

"Good luck with that. Call me tomorrow if you're still alive tomorrow." Claire joked.

Kate ran over to the other side of the street trying to catch up with Kensi. Kate was the complete opposite of Kensi. Kate was a petite, blue eyed, blonde, who was Miss. Popularity at the school. Kensi only recently started talking to Kate because of Claire. Claire was also new to town like Kensi. Claire's family had just moved in less then two months ago from Australia.

"Hey, wait for me. These shoes are killing me." Kate said, as she ran to try to catch up with Kensi's quick pace.

"I imagine so."

"I cant help it you don't understand." Kate said.

"I cant help it you cant walk in the shoes you pick out. If you're going to wear them at least be able to walk in the damn things." Kensi replied looking down to the heals Kate had chosen to wear.

"They are not made for walking. Hello, they are made for pretty." Kate said with an attitude.

"I am sure you're going to be really pretty when you trip and fall and bust your face open. Glamorous!" Kensi retorted.

Kate stopped right before she unlocked the door to her car, "Sometimes I forget you were raised by your dad." Kate replied.

"Sometimes I forget I am surrounded by idiots." Kensi mumbled under her breath as she climbed into the passenger seat of Kate's car.

Kensi sat nervously in the front seat of Kate's car. Kate had been blabbering non stop about the movie, and truthfully Kensi had stopped listening to her about ten oh my gods ago. The rain outside was starting to fall, the wind was howling out of control, a storm was on the horizon. Darkness was moving in.

"Just let me out at the end of the driveway incase my dad is home already." Kensi explained to Kate when they had pulled onto the dirt drive.

"Are you sure, its raining."

"I'm sure. It's just water. It's not like I am going to drown or anything."

"Ok then. Good night."

"Good night." Kensi said as she opened the door.

"Kensi." Kate called to her right before she shut the door.

"Yeah?" Kensi asked leaning her head back into the car to shield herself from assault of the falling rain.

"Thanks for going. You're not all that bad for a marine brat." Kate replied.

Kensi laughed, "And you're not at all that bad for a snob." Kensi said.

"Thanks. See you around." Kate said.

"Maybe." Kensi replied. Kensi shut the door to Kate's car, and took of towards her house.

Once she reached her yard, she half expected to see her dad's car. It was a little after midnight, and he usually didn't stay out that late. He always made such a big deal about leaving her at home all night by herself. Seeing how her house was still vacant, she opted to use her front door, instead of the window she left unlocked in her room.

Kensi used her key and made her way into the house. As soon as her feet crossed the threshold she was hell bound on getting to her room, and changing before her father caught her. She took the stairs two at a time on the way to her room. She stripped her clothes off, and shoved them underneath her bed so her father would not notice them. Note to self, wash them tomorrow when dad is at work, Kensi thought to herself. She redressed in her night clothes, and slipped under the covers of her bed. She exhaled, she was so glad she had made it back home and into bed before her dad had noticed her missing. Closing her eyes, she let sleep overtake her.

Kensi opened her eyes to the bright sun assaulting her vision first thing on this particular morning. She rolled over to look at her clock on the bed side table. 9:17, strange she thought to herself, her dad never let her sleep in past eight. Kensi yawned, then pulled herself out of bed.

"Hey dad. You awake?" Kensi asked knocking on her dad's door. No reply, Kensi opened the door. His bed was still made, not slept in from what Kensi could tell. Kensi crinkled her nose in confusion, he has never not come home she thought to herself. Deciding he would be home any minuet now, Kensi made her way downstairs to start her morning routine.

Kensi opened the cabinets above the stove, to grab one large mixing bowl, and the pancake mix. Before she even started on this adventure the door bell rung.

"Did you forget your key dad?" Kensi asked as she flung open the front door. Standing there in the door way was Jake, her father's best friend.

"Hey Jake!" Kensi said cheerfully, she left the door wide open for him to enter her house and she returned to her task of attempting to make pancakes.

"I'm making pancakes for breakfast want some?" Kensi asked dumping the batter into the bowl. Jake said nothing, he just continued to stare at Kensi.

"What? I promise I wont catch anything on fire this time. Last time it really was an accident, I didn't mean to lay the dish rag down so close to the burner. Besides I am sure dad will be hungry when he gets here. By the way, where is he? I thought he was with you last night?" Kensi said.

"Take a walk with me Kensi." Jake said.

"Jake, I'm making breakfast for dad." Kensi said.

"Trust me Kensi, it don't matter."

"Jake, you're really creeping me out." Kensi said stepping back way from the counter.

"Come with me Kensi, please. We have to talk. It's about your dad." Jake explained.

"What about him? Where is he?"

"Kens."

"I am not going anywhere with you till you tell me where the hell he is at." Kensi demanded.

Jake exhaled, he hated to be the one to do this. He hated being the one to have to tell this little girl he watched grow up that the thing she loved most in the world was gone. He wanted to do it, sure he was a MP, but he was more then that, he was Donald Blye's best friend, and he owed him that.

"He is gone Kensi." Jake whispered.

Kensi walked up to Jake so they were now standing face to face. "Gone? Gone where? He wouldn't go anywhere with out me." Kensi shouted at him.

"Kensi. Baby, last night after he left from having drinks with us, he was in an accident. They found his car this morning in the ditch. He didn't make sweetheart."

"No! No! You're lying." Kensi shouted to him.

"I wish to God I was." Jake said trying to fight back his own tears.

"No…no." Kensi cried as she fell to her knees on the kitchen floor. Jake rushed to her side, he wrapped his arms around the hysterical girl, and held her while she cried.

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry Kensi." Jake repeated over and over again as he rocked her in his arms.

"Why did this happen? Why? Is this my punishment?" Kensi cried.

"Dear God, no child." Jake pulled back so he could look Kensi in the eyes. "Look at me, this is not your fault."

"You don't know that. You don't know me. You know nothing. Get off me." Kensi said as she shoved Jake on his butt, and took off out the front door.

She didn't know where she was going, she didn't know what she had planned to do. She just knew she needed out of there, she needed to be alone. She didn't want to believe it, there was no way her father could be gone. Not now, not like this. What would she do without him? Who would she become? That uneasy feeling that had been eating at Kensi since last night had just devoured her completely. Her world, her everything, it was gone, there was nothing left, no one left, she was completely and utterly alone in this world.

**A/N: Hope you all like enjoyed it thanks for reading. **

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	5. Chapter 5

She ran until her feet hurt from the amount of anger that drove her on. She ran until her lungs burned, until her tears clouded her vision and she could no longer see. She found herself once again at her favorite spot down by the lake. So many times she had found herself here in this exact spot. She came here when she was happy, when she was sad, when she was lost, she came here when nothing else in the world made since to her. There was something about the peaceful serenity of the scenery that made her feel safe when she needed it the most.

She crossed her arms over her chest, and leaned her tired aching body against the tree. This was the tree she fell out of two summers ago and broke her arm. This was the same tree that had the initials DKB and KMB carved in its trunk. Everywhere she looked there were memories of him. Why? She cried out loud to the universe.

"Why did you leave me? You said we would always be together?" She screamed. Kensi walked over to the edge of the lake and looked down at her reflection. She could see him, her father, she knew it was just a hallucination. Just away for her mind to deal with the guilt and pain she was currently feeling. For the longest time she stood there staring and the false image that her mind had created. She wanted to turn around and scream daddy. She wanted nothing more in the world then to wrap her arms around his neck, and to wake up to find out this had all had just been a horrible nightmare.

"Why are you here?" Kensi asked to her father.

"_Because you need me to be." Her imaginary image of her father answered. _

"If that was true you wouldn't have left me."

"_I will never leave you. No matter where you go my home is where you are." _

"I don't have a home, or a life, I have nothing." She cried.

"_Do you remember the story about the caterpillar I use to tell you when you were a little girl?" Her hallucination asked. _

"I do. It was my favorite story."

"_What was the last line of the book Kensi?" _

Kensi cried, as she thought about the line her father was talking about. "Just when the caterpillar thinks her world is over she becomes a butterfly."

Kensi watched as her imaginary image of her father reached his hand out for her shoulder. Kensi closed her eyes, _"It's time to fly baby girl." he whispered to her. _When Kensi opened her eyes he was gone.

In life we never know what we are capable of until we are tested. We never know how strong are until we have to stand alone. We never realize this, we are never told this, some things in life you just have to experience on your own to fully understand.

**A/N: Thank you everyone who is reading and reviewing this story. Sorry this chapter was short it was just a filler chapter, the next chapter will be her father's funeral. **


	6. Chapter 6

"_Death leaves behind a heartache no one can heal, and a memory no one can steal." _

She stood in front of the full length mirror in her room looking at her reflection. This girl looking back at her she did not recognize. This girl was a stranger in her own eyes. She wore a simple black dress that came down to her knees, her hair was down and fell in lose waves over her shoulders, but that was not the unfamiliar part about this girl. This little girls eyes were blood shot red from tears of a life taken way to soon. This little girl's hands trembled with fear ,as she tried her hardest to put her heart locket her father had given her around her neck. She kept looking for something in the mirror, she kept expecting to turn and any second see her father by her side offering his assistants with her necklace. That wouldn't happened today, or tomorrow, or any other day for the rest of her life, she thought sadly. A gentle knock on the door pulled Kensi from her thoughts.

"It's time." Jake said.

Kensi turned one last time to her strange reflection in the mirror. She ran her hands over her dress, making sure everything was neat and in place for the funeral. Once she was satisfied things were as good as they were going to get, she followed Jake out of the room.

"If you need me I will be close by." Jake said.

"I don't know if I can do this." Kensi admitted.

"Yes, you can. You're Donald Blye's daughter you can do anything."

"How do you know that?" Kensi questioned.

"Because, that is how your father raised you." Jake explained. The two of them paused when they reached the back door. Kensi took in the people that were now pilling in to morn the loss of her father. Most of the men she was seeing here today were former Marines. Then, one person in particular caught her eye.

"What the hell is she doing here?" Kensi asked, letting go of Jake's arms she had currently been holding on to.

"She got here last night. She said she wanted to be here."

"She only came because she had to." Kensi said bitterly.

"She wanted to see you last night, but you were already asleep, and I refused to let her wake you." Jake explained.

"Thank you for that. I have nothing to say to her, and I don't wish to see her ever. If I could avoid her for the rest of my life that would be fantastic." Kensi said.

Kensi exhaled and made her way out into the crowd. One by one people came up to her offering their sympathies, and their willingness to do whatever it was she might need to get her through this dark time. Kensi just smiled and politely thanked each of them, when inside she was ready to snap and erupt at any give second. Why did they find the need to say sorry, what would that change? Why must they all tell her what a good man her father was? She knew this better then anyone. Things like this were what were driving her closer and closer to her breaking point. She did not break though, no she refused to fall weak in front of these Marines. Instead she smiled, when inside she was dying, she turned her feelings off and let herself become a vacant shell of emptiness.

"Kensi." A woman's voice called from behind her. Kensi turned her attention to see the woman in question. "You are so grown up." The woman said.

"Amazing how much three years can change someone." She said bitterly.

"Kensi, I am so sorry baby."

"You have never been sorry for anything a day in your life. Why start now mother?" Kensi explained.

"Kensi, don't be like that I am here for you." Julia said.

"You're here because you have to be, no other reason."

"That is not true and you know it."

"If it wasn't true then where have you been the past three years? You moved on with your new life and your new family in Boston, and forgot all about me, about dad. So don't you dare tell me how sorry you are." Kensi shouted at Julia.

"Kensi, I came because you need me. I came to take you home with me." Julie explained.

"Home? You mean your home. This is my home. These men here, these Marines, this is my family, not you. Not him. Not Boston." Kensi explained.

"I am sorry you feel that way. But regardless of what you want or how you feel, you are under 18 so you have no choice in the matter Kensi. I am the only family you have left, you will come with me. So we can either make the best of it or you can continue to be angry, either way you don't have a choice." Julia explained.

"You always have a choice mother. Now, if you will excuse me I am going to say goodbye to my father. Incase you forgot he is the man you betrayed." Kensi said as she turned and walked away from Julia.

Kensi sat in the front row by herself as the memorial to her father carried on. She listened in a daze as kind words and memories of her father were shared. Her mind drifted away from here to a happier place, to a place where she was not fatherless, to a place where her entire world was not falling apart. She vaguely recalled bits and pieces of the service. It wasn't until her father's commanding officer had presented her with her father's medallion and the flag that she was brought back to the harsh reality she was currently living in.

"We cherished your father as much as he cherished you." He said.

"Thank you sir this is a honor." Kensi responded as she accepted the items that had been presented to her.

"The honor is all ours Miss Blye." The Marine said as he saluted Kensi.

After the service was over Kensi sat in her same position, as she watched the people pay their respects and leave. She sat their waiting until their was no one left but her. Gathering all the courage she had left, she removed the items she had sitting in her lap, placed them on the chair next to her, and made her way over to the place she feared most in the world. When Julia saw Kensi approach her father's coffin she stated out after her, "No." Jake said grabbing Julia's arm. "This is something she has to do alone." He explained to Julia.

Kensi reached out and ran her fingers over the wood, that held her most valuable possession in this life. For a moment she just stood there, unsure of what to say or what to do. "I am sorry." She whispered. She reached up and snatched the heart necklace from around her neck, "Keep me with you wherever you go." She said as she lifted the side of the coffin and slipped the necklace to her father.

Kensi turned walking off with tears in her eyes. Just before she left the room she turned, "I will never let go." She said as she took off running out the room.

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews! I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Things after this chapter will start picking up a little bit as Kensi will make a decision in the upcoming chapters that will send her life on a new path, and find someone she never expected to find. **


	7. Chapter 7

It was nearly one that morning when Kensi came downstairs, and into the kitchen. Her mother was sitting at the table drinking coffee, with various papers spread out across the table in front of her. Julia looked up when she heard her daughter enter the kitchen.

"Kensi, what are you doing awake at this hour?" Julia asked looking at the clock on the stove.

"You didn't actually think I could sleep at a time like this did you?" She questioned.

"No, I don't suppose so." Julia replied turning her attention back to mess of papers in front of her.

Kensi opened the freezer and removed her tub of Rocky Road. She opened the tub, placed the lid on the counter and grabbed a spoon, then made her way over to the table where Julia sat.

"What are you doing?" Kensi asked.

"A bunch of legal mess nothing for you to worry about. What are you doing eating ice cream in the middle of the night?"

"First off it's 1:16 its not the middle of the night technically it's the next day. Second dad let me do it."

"Well your father is not here now." Julia replied.

"Looking at you here in my house is a constant reminder of that fact." Kensi retorted as she took a bite of her ice cream.

"Kensi, don't use that tone of voice with me. I am your mother." Julia replied.

"Really? Prove it." Kensi challenged.

"Fine." Julia said. Julia grabbed the tub of ice cream away from Kensi, and threw it in the trash can. "Now go to bed, its one in the morning." Julia demanded.

"I hate you." Kensi said.

"You will get over it." Julia replied.

"I wouldn't bet on it." Kensi said before she ran upstairs to her room.

Once she was in her room, her anger seemed to explode. Kensi grabbed a framed picture of her and her father off her dresser and threw it and the back of the door.

"Damn it." Kensi shouted to no one in particular.

She couldn't take this, she wouldn't take this. Her mother wanted to tell her she had no choice, but her father always taught there was always a choice you just had to be brave enough to make it. Tonight she was going to be brave, tonight she would chose her own destiny. Fueled by anger and determination, Kensi grabbed her book bag and dumped the contents of it out on her bed.

She rummaged through her dresser grabbing her a few change of clothes, her hair brush, and the money she had been saving from working this past summer, and packed it in her bag. She opened her jewelry box that sat next to her bed and removed her collection of jelly bracelets, her father's knife, and his medal she had been given at the funeral.

Kensi kneeled down next to the door, near the remains of the shattered picture frame. Inside of the broken glass was a picture of her and her father from last summer. It was taken at a dinner they had with his fellow marines. She had been dressed in a white dress, and she remembered taking this picture perfectly, because it was the first she had taken since she had her hair cut for school that year. Her father stood next to her, his arm thrown of her shoulder like he always did. He was dressed in his uniform and had a smile plastered on his face. Carefully, she removed this little reminder of a life that she once had. It hadn't even been a week since her father was killed tragically. Five days to be exact, she had been counting every painful second of her life without him. She tucked the picture safely away, and took one last look around to make sure she had everything from this life she wanted to take with her.

Kensi climbed out of her window and into the darkness of night. She ran down the drive way and towards the road. Once she reached the end, she paused. Turning back she took one last look at her world, at her life, at everything she has ever known. This part of her life was over, this part of her was dead and gone. It was time for her to fly like her father told her in her hallucination. So tonight she would open her wings, and see where the wind would guide her.

Kensi had been walking for several hours now and her tiredness was starting to get the best of her. It was almost five am now, and she had know idea where she was going. So she continued to walk along this lonely road she had set out upon. The wind was beginning to pick up and she could tell it was probably going to rain soon. "Perfect." Kensi mumbled to herself, as her luck would have it she would chose a night it was going to storm to runaway. In the distance Kensi saw a few street lamps, that were lighting up a park.

"Good enough." She said as she headed in the direction of the park.

When she reached the park it was deserted. Of course it's deserted who comes to a park at five in the morning she thought to herself. She found an empty bench that was near the swings, and plopped herself down. Her feet were tired and sore from walking for countless hours, she was hungry and her exhaustion was quickly catching up with her.

Kensi pulled her jacket tightly to her body. The wind was cool that night, and chilled her to the bone. Everything was quite, almost to quite for Kensi. She was always use to the noise. Kensi was just about to fall asleep when the sounds of approaching footsteps jarred her wide awake.

"Whoa! Easy killer, I was just going to see if I could sit?" The boy said pointing to the empty space on the bench next to Kensi.

"It's a free country." Kensi said. She relaxed and sat back against the bench like she had preciously been before his approach.

The boy nodded his head in thanks and sat down next to her. "You must be new in town, I have never seen you before. What is your name?" He asked trying to make polite conversation with Kensi.

"None of your business." She responded.

The boy laughed, "Nice to meet you none of your business, I am…"

"Pain in the ass." Kensi said cutting him off.

"Oh my God! How did you know?" The boy asked.

Kensi couldn't help but laugh at this. "You looked like one."

"So, none of your business. What are you doing running away from home?"

"What makes you think that I am?" Kensi asked.

"Its 5:04 am, you are sitting alone on a park bench with a book bag, and you look like you just lost your best friend." The boy explained.

"Maybe I did. Lose my best friend that is." Kensi admitted. She turned her attention to the boy sitting next to her for the first time. The first thing that caught Kensi's attention was his eyes, they were the brightest blue she had ever seen in her life. His hair was a blonde, he wore a pair of blue jeans, and a grey hoodie. Average, normal, definitely not a serial killer, Kensi thought to herself taking in the boy's appearance.

"Sorry to hear that. About your friend." He said. He paused for a brief moment then smiled. He extended his hand out to her, "I'm Marty. You know incase you want a friend."

Kensi reached out shaking Marty's hand. "Kensi." She whispered.

Marty stood up, "Want to take a walk? I hate sitting still?" He asked.

Kensi hesitated for a brief moment. Her father had always told her to trust her instincts, her instincts told her this boy meant no harm to her. She shrugged her shoulders, and stood up from the bench. "Sure. It's not like I have anywhere else to be." She said.

The two of them made their way through the park. "You never did tell me, why are you running away?"

"It's complicated." Kensi replied.

"Let me guess, your boyfriend got you pregnant and skipped town or you got cut from the cheerleading team?" Deeks asked.

"Why are you out here?" Kensi asked.

"Nope, no fair. I asked you first princess."

"I don't care, and don't call me princess."

"Attitude. I like it." Marty said.

"Deeks!" Someone shouted as they ran across the park to where he and Kensi were at.

"Hey man, what's up." Deeks said.

"I was looking for you. You coming tonight. We got food?"

"Yeah. Sure." Deeks turned his attention to Kensi, "She is coming too."

"I am?" Kensi asked.

"You are. I will see you in a little bit Ray."

"Ok Deeks." Ray said. Then he took off jogging back in the direction he had previously come from.

"Deeks?" Kensi asked.

"It's my last name. Everyone sort of calls me that." He explained.

"It's better then Marty." Kensi said with a smile.

"Touche Kensalina."

"Kensalina?" She asked.

"It's better then Kensi." He said returning her smile.

She laughed and just shook her head at him. "Come on, lets go eat before the food gets cold." Deeks said.

"What makes you think I am going anywhere with you?" Kensi questioned.

"First off you have nowhere else to go you said so yourself. Secondly, you have no friends, and thirdly.."

"I think you mean third?"

"Thirdly, you're hungry I can hear your stomach growling from over here." He explained.

Kensi rolled her eyes at Deeks. "Seriously, come eat with us. No one will bother you I promise, I got your back partner." Deeks said.

Kensi didn't know if she should trust this mysterious, good looking stranger. She did however know three things one she could take care of herself, two she was hungry, and three she really had nowhere else to go. Kensi shrugged her shoulders, "What the hell." She said.

**A/N: Thank you to everybody who is still reading this story. Hopefully, now that Kensi has met Deeks things will be more interesting for you guys. I hope you enjoyed it. **


	8. Chapter 8

Kensi and Deeks walked through the quite streets of the small neighborhood. Much to Kensi's relieve, Deeks did not seem to be taking her to some kind of wild party filled with a bunch of invocated fools.

"You ok?" Deeks asked as they walked down the desolated street.

"I'm fine" She replied.

"Here we are." Deeks said as he pointed to the second to last house on the right.

"This is it?" Kensi asked. The house itself was average size for the area. It had a black iron fence around the front that fenced off the yard. There were three windows across the front, and small flowers in various colors outlined the path of the cement walkway that led to the front door.

"This is it. What? Were you expecting me to take you to some kind of drunken rave?" Deeks asked jokingly.

"I don't know. Maybe, I was just kind of…."

"Afraid?" Deeks asked cutting her off mid sentence.

"I am not afraid of anything." Kensi clarified quickly.

"Somehow, I don't doubt that. I get the feeling you are more then capable of taking care of yourself."

"You got that right."

"Come on." Deeks said opening the fence.

The two of them made their way up to the front door of the quite suburban home. Just before Deeks could reach for the door knob, Ray opened the front door.

"About damn time, we were going to eat without you." Ray said motioning them into the house, "the food is on the stove help yourself." Ray said to Kensi.

"This way." Deeks said to Kensi. The two of them made their way into the kitchen, with Ray close behind them. "Here." Deeks said removing a plate from the cabinet and handing it over to Kensi. Just about the time Kensi had got done making her plate a medium size chocolate lab came running into the kitchen barking at Ray aggressively.

"I swear this dog is angry at me for something. You better do something with him he hates me." Ray said.

"Dogs don't get angry they go mad." Kensi replied. She sat her plate down on the counter and kneeled down to the dog in question. "Come here boy." She called to him. Without any doubt from the lab he trotted off to Kensi, and allowed her to pet him.

"Ok does Wikipedia have a name?" Ray asked.

"None of your business." Deeks said looking to Kensi with a smile.

"You're hilarious." Kensi said sarcastically. Kensi stood up from petting the dog, and turned her attention to Ray. "I'm Kensi. Does this pain in the ass live here?" She questioned.

"Oh, I like her." Ray said looking over to Deeks. "He more or less lives here you could say." Ray explained to Kensi.

"Ray, Deeks are you two coming." A blonde girl said as she walked into the kitchen. She stopped in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest. Her look turned from happy to pissed when she saw Kensi leaning up against the counter at Deeks side.

"Who is she?" The girl asked.

"She is none of your business Nicole. Lets go." Ray said grabbing the blonde by the hand and leading her out of the kitchen.

Once Ray and Nicole were out of the kitchen Kensi turned to Deeks.

"Why do I get the feeling she doesn't like me?" Kensi asked.

"Because she doesn't like anyone." Deeks explained. He grabbed his plate as he led Kensi out of the kitchen, and into the living room.

"I think you are wrong about that one." Kensi said with a grin. She sat down on the couch next to Deeks, with her plate in her lap.

"What do you mean?"

"She most definitely likes you." Kensi said.

"Why would you say that?" Deeks questioned her.

"Because, when she walked into the kitchen and saw me she looked like she was ready to throw down. She looked at me as if I had stepped in on something that belonged to her. But you don't like her back that way do you?"

"How in the world can you possibly know that?"

"I am good at reading people. Something I learned a long time ago, always be aware of your surroundings and who is around you at all times." She explained.

"Well ok then." Deeks responded.

"Am I wrong about Nicole?" Kensi asked curiously. She took a bite of her pizza then sat it back down on her plate, turning her full undivided attention to Deeks.

Deeks thought for a moment before he answered her. It was strange for him to have this kind of connection to someone he had just met. It was strange to him to have any kind of connection with anyone at all. After his childhood he never really trusted anyone enough to share things with, he never really had anyone who really cared to know things about him before.

Deeks sighed, "No. You're not wrong about her. She is Ray's girl, she is suppose to be anyways. In one way or another she has always been in love with me." Deeks admitted.

"What about you do you love her?" Kensi asked tilting her head to the side, and biting on her lower lip.

Deeks laughed, "No, not even close. No need to get jealous sugarbear." Deeks said with a grin. Kensi reached over and punched him in the shoulder.

"Oh shit! What was that for?" Deeks asked.

Kensi laughed, "The nicknames."

"Well you better get use to them sunshine." Deeks said rubbing his now sore shoulder. "By the way where the hell did you learn to punch like that?"

"Family." She responded.

"Who's family Xena's?"

Kensi snorted. Deeks watched as her expression went from amused to heartbroken in thirty seconds flat. Then barley above a whisper Kensi replied, "My dad."

Deeks watched as he could almost literally see her heartbreaking. Her dad, he thought to himself. He wonder what it was that had happened between them, was he the reason she ran away? Was he the best friend she lost? So many things he wanted to ask her, so many things he would love to know. Right now he knew was not that time. Right now he knew she needed a friend more then anything else in the world. Deeks decided right there, while Kensi was sitting on the couch just a foot away from him, that he would be that for her.

**A/N: What do you guys think? Thanks to those reading and reviewing this story. **


	9. Chapter 9

They sat in silence for almost ten minuets until Deeks couldn't take it anymore. "Your dad, is he the friend you lost?" Deeks asked.

"You know for a stranger I just met you ask a lot of questions." Kensi replied.

"Then answer them and we wont be strangers."

"He died a week ago tomorrow. He was my best friend." She admitted.

"I am sorry. I had know idea." Deeks replied sympathetically.

"Well now you do." Kensi said trying to lighten the mood. "What about you? What is your story?" Kensi questioned.

"My father is an abusive bastard. My mom and I don't get along so I left. I wasn't old enough to be on my own, so I came to stay with Ray he is 19 . Ray got his own place last year when he turned 18, his family also not friendly." Deeks explained.

"My mom and I don't get along either she is the reason I ran away." Kensi admitted.

Deeks laughed, "Well aren't we quite the couple." He replied.

"You wish." Kensi said.

"More then you know sweetheart."

Kensi found it so easy to talk to him. They seemed to have a natural chemistry as if they had been friends their entire lives. Kensi wasn't one for opening up or sharing her personal life with anyone, and yet here she was sharing things with Deeks.

"What are you smiling at princess?" Deeks asked with a sly grin.

"Was I smiling?" She asked.

Deeks reached over and brushed her hair behind her ears, "You were and now your blushing. What were you thinking about?" He questioned.

"Not you." She responded quickly, probably to quickly.

"The fact that you said not me, tells me it was in fact me." He said proudly. "So what exactly about me were you thinking sunshine?" Deeks asked looking right into her mismatched eyes.

Kensi hesitated, she wanted to quip back with a like I would ever tell you, or something smart ass, but when he looked into her eyes all of those thoughts were erased. She saw something deep within the depths of those piercing blue eyes something she could not lie to. "You're so easy to talk to. It seems like I have known you forever." Kensi admitted. As soon as the words left her mouth she was almost stunned at what she had just said, at what she had just admitted. It was the truth, but why she said it aloud she hadn't the faintest idea.

Without breaking the seriousness of the moment Deeks reached out, he laid one hand on top of her hand, "Maybe you were meant for me." He replied.

"Phhh. Please tell me that girls don't actually fall for that line." She said jokingly trying to break the serious mood they were currently in.

Deeks turned his head to the side, "I don't know. I have never used it before." Deeks admitted.

Kensi stood up abruptly from couch, "I better go. It's getting late, well early actually." Kensi said looking at her watch.

"Go where?" Deeks questioned.

Kensi didn't say anything. She really didn't know where she would go, she didn't really have a plan honestly.

"That is exactly what I thought. You don't have anywhere to go do you?" Deeks asked.

"No, but I can find somewhere." Kensi said.

"Are you crazy? Do you know what people out there would do to a girl like you? This isn't the place to be roaming the streets all by yourself. I know you're all bad ass and all but still. You can stay here."

"You want me to stay here with you? I just met you?" Kensi reminded him.

"Ok, that is true and a legitimated reason. But here me out ok. Your safer here, no one will hurt you. Ray cant fight to safe his life, Nicole and you I would pay to see in a fight, and me I would never want to fight you because you would just kick my ass and ruin my reputation as a bad ass because I got beat up by a girl." Deeks explained.

Kensi laughed at his honesty.

"Come on." Deeks said reaching his hand out to her. Kensi sighed and gave in taking his hand. He led her out of the living room and upstairs. He opened the door to his room. To Kensi shook the room was all neat, it was not disorganized, it wasn't what she figured a typical room for him would look like. The first thing she noticed was the surfing magazines, and the pictures on the wall of him surfing.

"This is my room, that is now your room. Make yourself at home. I will stay on the couch."

"Down stairs?" Kensi questioned.

"Yeah. That is the only couch we have."

Deeks turned to leave the room, "Deeks." Kensi called.

"Yeah?"

"Don't take this the wrong way, but will you stay here in this room. I don't know anyone here, and I trust you. I don't….."

Deeks reached over and grabbed a blanket and pillow. He threw it together on the floor.

"I will stay as long as you need me." Deeks said as he sat down on his make shift bed on the floor.

Kensi crawled into Deeks bed, "How is forever?" She joked.

"I am not going anywhere."

Kensi relaxed for the first time since she had left the safety of her own home. She felt something about Deeks, something she has never felt before. Her heart raced when she was around him, but she was not afraid. Her hands trembled whenever he was near to her, but she was not nervous, and her stomach was filled with butterflies.

"Good night Kensalina." Deeks said.

"Good night Deeks." Kensi said as she reached over and turned off the light.

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter.**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thank you for all your reviews on this story. I hope you all like where this is going and enjoy this new chapter. **

She tossed and turned throughout the night. Her nightmares haunted her, her terrors showed up every time she closed her eyes. Deeks woke that night to the muffled sound of Kensi's whimpering cries. He sat up on the floor, looking around his a room. It took him a moment to remember where he was, and why he was sleeping on the floor of his own room. Then he heard her whimpers and he remembered. He smiled, for a while there he had almost thought he had dreamed this perfect day up, this perfect girl. Deeks moved over to sit on the bed beside her.

"Kensi." He said.

Kensi opened her eyes, and jumped up out of the bed. "Whoa! Easy you're ok." Deeks said putting his hands up to show her he meant no harm. Kensi laid back down in the bed and turned her back away from Deeks. She tried so hard not to cry, she didn't want to do this not hear, not now. She couldn't help it; she had been fighting it for far too long. So she cried.

"Kensi?" Deeks asked.

Kensi rolled over to face Deeks. Her eyes were red; her tears were running down her face uncontrollably. She looked up at him. "What's wrong? What can I do?" Deeks asked Kensi.

"I see him when I close my eyes. Every night he is there. Every night I try to do things differently, I don't leave, I tell him not to leave, and… and it always ends the same. He dies." She explains.

Deeks looked at her confused for a moment, and then all of a sudden it clicked, "Your dad?" Deeks asked.

Kensi nodded her head yes as she tried to gain control of herself. Deeks eased himself down next to her in the bed; he reached his arms out around Kensi's shoulder and brought her body close to his. She rested her head on his chest, and he ran his fingers through her hair, as he held her while she fell apart.

"It's ok. I have got you baby girl." Deeks said. Deeks didn't really know what to do. He didn't really know what to say that could take away the pain she was feeling. He had never been good with emotional stuff, so he just held her until she cried herself to sleep. Long after she had fallen asleep, Deeks just kept watching her sleep. He didn't want to close his eyes; he didn't want her to have another nightmare that he could stop.

The next morning Deeks was still awake, he never did close his eyes the night before. Instead he spent the whole night watching this beautiful broken girl sleep in his arms. Kensi yawned, looking up from her position on Deeks chest.

"Good morning sunshine." He said.

"Morning." She said as she pulled herself up into a sitting position. "I'm.. Oh God this is really embarrassing."

Deeks smiled at her, "You're gorgeous even first thing in the morning after crying all night long."

Kensi smiled sweetly at his gesture of trying to make her feel more comfortable. "I.. I am sorry for falling apart." Kensi whispered.

"You have nothing to be sorry for." Deeks replied.

"Thank you."

"For what?" Deeks questioned.

"Being you. Not many guys are as honorable as you." Kensi explained

"I told you, you will always be safe with me. I meant it." Deeks admitted. Deeks climbed out of the bed, and turned back towards Kensi. "How about breakfast?" Deeks asked extending a hand to Kensi. Kensi smiled taking his hands, "Sounds great. I am starving." Kensi said.

Kensi and Deeks made their way into the kitchen. Deeks grabbed skillets, and laid them out on the stove.

"What?" Deeks asked when he turned around to find Kensi smiling at him.

"I can't cook." Kensi said honestly.

"Well lucky for you, I can. Now get your butt over and assist me." Deeks explained.

"I will try. I can't make any promises." Kensi laughed.

Deeks grabbed a bowl and the cartoon of eggs and placed it in front of Kensi. Deeks leaned in close to Kensi, "I will give you an easy job. One I have no doubt you can manage. Crack these eggs so I can make us an omelet." Deeks said.

Kensi blushed, and her heart beat rapidly at their closeness. She instinctively moved in closer towards Deeks.

"Hey man!" Ray said.

Kensi and Deeks pulled away from each other. "Morning Deeks, Wikipedia. What's for breakfast?" Ray asked clearly oblivious to the fact her interrupted their moment.

"Possibly omelets, if Kensi ever gets the eggs cracked here." Deeks said putting it off on Kensi.

Kensi rolled her eyes at Deeks, then started cracking the eggs in the bowl for breakfast. "Well seeing has you two of have this situation under control; I am going to just go now. So um yeah enjoy." Ray said awkwardly.

Deeks and Kensi both laughed as Ray turned and walked off into the other room.

"What's was that all about?" Kensi asked Deeks as soon as Ray exited the room.

"It's Ray, who the hell knows," Deeks explained. "You have those eggs ready for me yet sweet cheeks?" He asked.

"Yep. Eggs are ready." Kensi said. She moved over towards Deeks who was standing at the stove, she placed the bowl down beside him on the counter that held the content of the cracked eggs he was seeking. "So where did you learn how to cook?" Kensi questioned.

"I kind of just taught myself. I was in one of those situations where it was learning to cook and take care of yourself or starve, because the people in my house that called themselves my parents sure as hell were not going to do it." Deeks explained. Deeks turned his attention to Kensi as he added the eggs to skillet. "What about you? How did you not learn how to cook?" He joked.

Kensi smiled and jumped up on the counter beside Deeks to sit on. "My mom wasn't around she left my dad a few years ago for another. She tried to take me with her, but I ran away back to my dad. It's has always been him and me since then."

"And your mom? Where is she now?" Deeks asked.

"I imagine she is heading back to Boston. That is where she thought she was taking me."

"Where was home?" Deeks asked.

"It's always been all over the place. My dad was a marine so we traveled a lot. We were about to move to California." Kensi admitted. Deeks took an omelet out of the skillet, flipped it onto the plate, then passed the plate to Kensi.

"So was that your plan, head to California?" Deeks wondered.

"It was."

"And what happened to your wonderful plan?" Deeks joked.

"I was side tracked by something I never expected to find." She said with a smile.

"Well that makes two of us princess." He said with a smile. "Now, eat we have stuff to do today."

"We do?" She asked confused.

"We do indeed Kens."


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Sorry for the long delay here is the newest chapter if anyone is still with me on this story. If you all have sometime check out my newest Densi fics called Don't you want to stay and Pieces of my heart. Hope you enjoy!**

Julia sat at the kitchen table with the shards of the shattered picture frame from Kensi's room in her hands. She didn't understand what was wrong with her daughter; she didn't understand how she could possibly hate her so much. Then again Kensi always was her daddy's little girl.

"Julia." Jake called through the open screened door of Donald Blye's home.

"Come in please Jake, I need your help. " She said fighting back the tears. Jake looked around the house taking in the surroundings. Something you learned to do quickly in his line of work. He looked over her shoulder and saw the shattered glass on the table.

"Where is Kensi?" Jake asked. Over the past few years Jake had become very close with Donald and his daughter. He practically was part of their family.

"I don't know." Julia said covering her mouth as she started to cry.

"You don't know? How can you not know where your daughter is?" Jake questioned.

"We had a fight earlier."

"A fight? Are you insane arguing with her right now, with the trauma she has just been through?"

"She didn't want to listen to me, and I sent her to her room for bed."

"And let me guise she ran away." Jake said crossing his arms over his chest.

"Yes, how did you know? Do you know where is? Her friends does she have any she would go too?" Julia questioned.

"I know because unlike you I know your daughter. Friends, no she has some but none she would go to. Kensi would see going to someone else for help a sign of weakness. She won't ask anything from anybody until she is certain of them." Jake explained.

"Certain of what?" Julia asked as she made her way over to dispose of the broken glass.

"Their trust. It's the number one thing her father always taught her, trust it's everything. If she trusts someone she will count on them, like she did her father, and I. And if she doesn't well.. Kensi will be Kensi and find a way to do it on her own that is what she does best."

"I don't know what to do. I don't know where to look." Julia explained.

"Don't look. She will find you if and when she is ready. Trust me Kensi can take care of herself she has had many lessons, and her father has taught her how to survive anywhere."

"What in the world did Donald teach our daughter?" Julia asked.

"Everything she will ever need to know. I am headed out in two weeks I will be in Germany after that. If I hear from Kensi I will let you know, but believe me when I say no one is going to find her until she is ready to be found." Jake explained.

"I will find her." Julia said.

"And then what will you do once you have? Will you force her to come back with you? Will you ground her when doesn't do what you want? She is only going to run again, and the harder you look the faster she will run."

"What if she is hurt? What if she needs me?"

"Trust me this is something she needs to do. Let her be, let her see if she can fly on her own."

"And what if she cant?" Julia questioned.

"When the baby bird tries to fly for the first out of the nest and lands on her face instead of soaring in the clouds the mother bird always takes her back to the nest."

"I will always take her back."

"She knows that. She may not show it but she does. "Jake explained as he turned and headed to exit the house.

"Thank you. And Jake if you talk to Kensi, tell her she can always come home."

"I will. Goodbye Julia." Jake replied.

"Goodbye Jake, and thank you for always looking out for Kensi."

"Look when you said we had things to do today this is not exactly what I had in mind." Kensi replied as they walked together.

"Oh come on sugar plum what teenage girl dosen't want to be at the beach with me."

"Your awfully sure of yourself there aren't you Romeo?" Kensi asked.

"Only when it comes to you." Deeks said flashing her his trademark grin.

Kensi didn't know what it was about him that got her. Was it his smile, his blue eyes, or was it his aggravating little nick names for her. She didn't know what it was, but whatever it was its was definitely there. There was something between them and there was no denying that.

"So is this what you do all day? Walk around the beach to pick up chicks all day long."

"Nope. Not even close. And besides I don't need to try and pick up girls." Deeks replied.

"Yeah why not?"

Deeks smiled, he knew where this was going so he decided to cave in and give her what he knew she wanted to hear. He smile, slung his arm around her shoulder and then replied with, "I already have one."

Kensi smiled at his gesture of affection to her. "Good to know Shaggy. Good to know." She said. Her heart felt free like it hadn't in a long time. She felt happy and didn't feel guily about being happy for once. Ever since her father died, she felt like she was not allowed to be happy. She felt like being happy would somehow dishonor his memory. She knew though deep down inside of her that no matter how much time had passed she would always have the hole in her heart that would never heal because of his death. Sometimes the point though isn't to heal, but just to learn to deal. Besides if her father was here and knew he would want her to be happy. To have the life he always wanted her to have.

"So, if we are not here to pick up girls, then what exactly are we at the beach for at ten in the morning?" Kensi wondered.

"You will see all in good time my sweet." Deeks said.

"Good the nicknames get any worse?"

"I have millions on top of a millions I have been saving just for you my sweet."

"My sweet? Really? Not even my grandma says that anymore. You need to stick with names from this decade please."

"You got sunshine." He replied.

Kensi laughed, "That is better, not great but better."


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Here is a new chapter for this story if anyone is still with me. I am going to try to start updating this one regularly again. I had writers block for a while but now I have a few ideas in the making for it now. Apologies for my brains delay on this. Hope you all will enjoy!**

Kensi and Deeks walked to the far end of the beach, they had stopped when they had reached a tiny nasty yellow colored building. Kensi wrinkled her nose on their approach of the building.

"God what is this place?"

"It's a friends place someone I wanted you to meet." Deeks explained.

Deeks opened the door on the ugly yellow building and let Kensi enter first. Once she was inside she waited for Deeks to take the lead. For someone so in charge Deeks had never seen her shy away like she was doing now. He smiled to himself and reached down taking her hand in his.

"Mike." Deeks shouted.

"Well…well, look who finally comes around. Good to see you Marty where the hell have you been?" Mike asked.

"Busy." Deeks said.

"I can see that." Mike said turning his attention to Kensi.

"Mike this is Kensi." Deeks explained.

"Hey sweetheart." Mike said.

Kensi rolled her eyes, "I am not your sweetheart."

"Oh I like her already Marty. Are you still surfing today?" Mike questioned.

"Are you serious? Of course I am!" Deeks replied.

"That is my boy. Be there at noon." Mike said as he reached out and shook hands with Deeks.

"See you then." Deeks said.

Kensi felt a huge relief off of her when they were out of the building. "Who the hell is that?" Kensi asked.

"Mike is an old friend of mine and Ray's."

"He seems…"

"Strange." Deeks jumped into help her out with what she wanted to say. He could tell she hesitated out of fear of hurting his feelings.

"Maybe a little. What is his story?"

"Nothing much, just another kid the world has abandoned kind of like me and Ray. He opened up that small seafood dive after he turned 18. It's not the greatest place in the world but it's his. His makes the bills and gets to spend all day on the beach, so I would say it's not a bad deal." Deeks explained to Kensi.

"Not bad at all. So when are you going to tell me about this surfing thing at noon?"

The two of them had stopped walking, and were just standing side by side looking out to the ocean.

"Not much to tell really just a local surf competition."

"So you're like a professional surfer?"

Deeks laughed, "No one has ever called me that before. No I don't know maybe it's just something I do." Deeks said as he sat down in the sand. Kensi shrugged her shoulders and followed his lead and sat down next to him.

"Are you any good?"

Deeks just smirked and shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe a little. Can you surf?"

"Never tried." Kensi responded.

"Well now we are just going to have to do something about that aren't we?"

Kensi turned and looked Deeks straight in the eyes. "You are crazy if you think I am going to go out in the ocean and let you teach me how to surf, I could drown or something."

"Can you swim?" Deeks asked.

"Of course I can swim." Kensi said with attitude.

"Then you won't drown darling." Deeks stood up from his spot on the sand and brushed the lose sand of his butt.

"If you let me teach you how to surf this afternoon then I will do something for you that you have been thinking about ever since I met you."

"And what would that be?" Kensi asked still sitting in the sand.

"Do you trust me?" Deeks questioned.

Kensi smiled, "I trust you with everything."

Deeks kneeled down in the sand right in front of Kensi. He reached out and gently tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. Kensi's heart took off at a hundred miles an hour when she felt his fingers brush her cheekbone. "Close your eyes." Deeks whispered to her. Kensi didn't hesitate at all she closed her eyes on his orders.

Deeks leaned and gently pressed his lips to hers. He waited for her to respond before he continued to kiss her, and just like he knew she would she did respond. Deeks pulled back first, when he could no longer breathe.

"Wow! That was intense." Deeks said.

Kensi opened her eyes to be met with his beautiful blue orbs. She reached up with her hand and touched her lips, then ran her tongue over her bottom lip. Deeks saw the blush on Kensi's face as she looked away from him.

"That was your first kiss wasn't it?" Deeks asked.

Kensi didn't say nothing she just nodded her head yes.

"You were amazing." Deeks said as reached out and touched her cheek again.

Kensi just sat there for a moment watching the ocean as her heart beat returned to a normal one, and not one that was frantic and out of control. Deeks didn't say nothing he just watched her silently. After about three minutes Kensi stood up and started brushing sand off her legs.

"If you let me drown out there I am coming back as ghost to haunt you for the rest of your life." Kensi said.

"Hey." Deeks said as he reached out and took both of her hands in his. "I won't ever let anything happen to you. You can bet your life on that princess."

Kensi bit her bottom lip and she watched the serious expression on Deeks face. "I believe you." She answered honestly.

"Good now that we got that cleared up; let's see what you go on the waves Kensalina." Deeks said.

"What do I get if I win?" Kensi asked.

"Win what?" Deeks asked.

"Surfing."

"Is everything a competition to you?" Deeks questioned.

"It makes life interesting." Kensi replied.

"Ok if you win, I will do whatever you want."

"Anything?" Kensi asked with a grin.

"As long as it doesn't involve me running naked down a public beach, or dressing up like a chick yeah anything."

"You have to take me on a real date."

"Now that I can do, hell I might even let you win just so I can win that date with you sugarbear." Deeks explained.

"You're crazy." Kensi said laughing.

"You love it though."

"I do." Kensi said.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Thank you all you amazing people for the reviews and for sticking with me. Here is the next chapter.**

"Kens, come here and stop complaining." Deeks said as he reached his hand over the surf board to Kensi. Kensi rolled her eyes but decided to take took his offered hand.

"This sucks." Kensi said.

Deeks laughed at Kensi. "It's not funny you're an ass." Kensi replied.

"It's hysterical."

Kensi growled in anger at Deeks, "I hate this."

"Has anyone ever told you how adorable you are when you're angry?" Deeks asked.

"Deeks."

"See you're stunning. Now bring you're stunning self around here." Deeks said to Kensi.

"Fine, but I am doing this under extreme protest." Kensi said as she swam around to the other side of the board where Deeks was.

"Of course you are." Deeks said.

When Kensi made it around to Deeks, he took one arm from the surf board and wrapped it around Kensi's waist. "Get on." Deeks ordered.

"No, Deeks I have already fell like ten times and my butt hurts."

"Kens, its water how does your butt hurt?"

"It just does, I probably have a bruise the size of Texas on my ass."

"Your being dramatic now sunshine….but I would be happy to check."

Kensi elbowed Deeks in the stomach, "There she is" Deeks said laughing, "Now come on get on the board Kens."

Kensi climbed on the board and laid on her stomach just like she had been doing for the better part of an hour now. "Good girl, now hold on to the sides." Deeks said. He walked around to the back of the surf board and climbed on it for the first time today with her.

"Paddle" Deeks ordered Kensi. She let her arms drape off the side of the board as she started paddling through the water like Deeks order her to. Once she had made it to where he had wanted he reached out and took her arm. "Get up." He said.

Kensi stood up on the board; Deeks grabbed her waist and helped her set her stance correctly then bailed off the back of the bored. Deeks watched from his position in the water as Kensi rode the wave in.

"Yeah, Hell yeah! That's my girl." Deeks shouted to her when she had made it. Deeks took off eagerly swimming to her.

"Deek! Deeks, I did it!" Kensi shouted.

"Yes you did." Deeks said as he stood up out of the water.

Kensi didn't give him the chance to make it to the shore before she came running to him. They were standing in knee deep water when she threw herself into his arms.

"I did it." She said again.

"I told you, you wouldn't drown." Deeks replied.

Kensi pulled back from him so she could look at his face, she left her arms still wrapped around his neck. "I believe you owe me a date mister." Kensi reminded him.

"That is one debt I am willing to pay." Deeks explained.

"Can I have one more thing?" Kensi asked.

"You know you can have anything you want."

"Good." Kensi said as she leaned in and kissed him quickly. She pulled back, smiled at him, and then took off running towards the shore line.

"Hey! That is cheating." Deeks said as he took off after Kensi.

Kensi stood in front of the mirror holding up two different shirts, trying to decide what to wear.

"Hey! Can I come in?" Nicole said. Kensi turned around to find Nicole leaning against the door to her room.

"Sure." Kensi said as she turned back to the mirror. Nicole walked over to Kensi and took both of the shirts out of her hands. "Here." She said handing her a dark purple dress. "Try this." Nicole suggested. Kensi looked down to the dress in her hands. It was a dark deep purple strapless dress that was about knee length when she held it up to her.

"Try it on." Nicole encouraged her.

Kensi did as Nicole suggested and slipped the dress on. To Kensi's shock it looked great on her. Kensi was not really much of a dress kind of her girl, but tonight she could make an exception for him.

"It looks great on you." Nicole said.

"Thanks. Can I ask you something?" Kensi said as she turned to face Nicole.

"Sure."

"Why are you helping me?" Kensi asked.

Nicole smirked, "You think I want Deeks to myself?" Nicole asked.

"Don't you?"

"I did at one time. He doesn't see me that way, he never will with you around." Nicole replied.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be you can't help who you love. And as for the answer to your question it's because I want him to be happy. Even it's not with me. I know he loves you. I see the way he looks at you when you enter the room. I see the way he hangs on to every word you say, he is completely in love with you. I have never seen him happier than he is now." Nicole explained.

Kensi dropped her hair she had in her hands, which she had been trying to twist up into a bun. Nicole grabbed Kensi's wrist and led her to the chair. "Sit, let me fix it." Nicole said.

"Alright." Kensi agreed.

"So where are you taking Wikipedia?" Ray asked.

"We have reservations at mind your own damn business Ray." Deeks said.

Ray laughed, "Ok ok, fine but promise to tell me tomorrow."

"You live for gossip more than that girl of yours." Deeks said.

"I can't help it. It's just I have never seen you so…so.."

"Happy." Deeks interrupted.

"Yeah."

"That is because I am. For the first time since.. God I don't even know when I am honestly happy Ray. There is something about her like nobody else I have ever known. She is…"

"She is beautiful." Ray said as he saw Kensi walking down stairs with Nicole behind her.

Deeks turned around to find Kensi standing on the bottom step. She wore the knee length purple dress, her hair was down except the sides that were pulled back and braided.

"She is perfect." Deeks said when he could finally form a thought.

"Thank you, both of you." Kensi said.

"Thank you." Kensi said as she looked back to Nicole.

"Anytime. You two have fun." Nicole replied.

Ray walked over to Nicole as the two of them watched Kensi and Deeks leave out. Ray turned to look at Nicole.

"Do you think we will ever be like that?" Ray asked.

"I doubt it. There love is one of a kind." Nicole said.

"It's the best love story I have ever seen." Ray admitted.

**A/N: The next chapter will be their date. **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Again thank you for all those who are taking time to read and review. **

Kensi and Deeks walked quietly hand in hand together along the water's edge of the beach as they made their way towards the destination Deeks had in mind.

"Can I ask you something?" Kensi questioned.

"Anything you want to sweetheart."

"How did you end up here?" Kensi questioned.

"Here is home, well not exactly here but about six miles from here is where I was born good old Eugene, Oregon. What about you where were you born?" Deeks asked.

"Boston." Kensi replied.

"How did you end up on the other side of the country?" Deeks asked.

"My dad. He is, he was a Marine. My mom and dad split up a few years ago. Mom wanted me to stay with her but I ran away to follow my dad. Mom knew I wasn't coming back so she let dad keep me. It was just me and dad ever since that day." Kensi explained.

"What happened to him?"

Kensi sighed, "Hey its ok if you don't want to tell me." Deeks said.

"It's ok, its just I have never told anyone the story before. You're going to think I am terrible person." Kensi replied sadly.

Deeks stopped walking and turned so he and Kensi were face to face. He took both of her hands in his, "Nothing in this world could ever change the way I feel about you." Deeks confessed.

"My dad had just got in that day, and I wanted to go see a movie with my friend. He didn't like the girl I was going with she was trouble according to dad. He told me that he would take me that weekend to see the movie. I got mad and went to my room. He came to check on me an hour or so later, to tell me he was going out with his friends. As soon as I was sure he was gone I snuck out of the house and went anyways. When I got home he still wasn't there. I considered myself lucky that I hadn't got caught, this was the first time I had ever disobeyed his orders. I changed got ready for bed and waited and waited for him to come home only he never did. He was killed in a car accident that night. The next morning his best friend came to the house and told me." Kensi explained.

"Hey it's not your fault."

"It is, if we wouldn't have been fighting he would have never left." Kensi replied.

"Kens, you don't know that, he might have still went out with his friends, if it wasn't that day it would have been another. The one thing I have learned growing up alone is that we can't blame ourselves for things that are beyond our control. Your dad was a good man and he loved you remember that. I wish I had something like that to hold onto." Deeks explained.

"Your dad wasn't a nice a man was he?" Kensi questioned.

"No Kensalina, he wasn't. He made a sport out of beating my mother and I as part of his daily routine in life. He almost killed my mother." Deeks replied.

"You stopped him didn't you?"

"What makes you think that?"

"It's the kind of person you are, always putting others before yourself. I know, I could tell the second I met you in that park. Something told me that I could trust you, that I would always be safe with you. One of the things my dad always taught me was trust your first instinct it's usually the one that is right."

Deeks led Kensi to his friend's nasty colored yellow building that was at the end of the beach. He opened the door and led Kensi inside by her wrist.

"And what do your instincts tell you about this?" Deeks asked as he flipped the light on.

Kensi was left speechless as she looked around the once ugly building. In the middle of the room there was only one table with two chairs around it. The center of the table had a vase with roses; along the counters of the restaurant were different types of food laid out for their dinner. Red and pink rose petals covered the old wood floor of the building.

"My instincts tell me that you are the one." Kensi said.

"Good because I know without a doubt that you are, and I am never letting you go."

"Promise?" Kensi asked.

"I promise to never let you go." Deeks vowed to her.

Kensi walked to the table that was sitting in the middle of the room, "Wow! This is amazing."

"I wasn't exactly sure what you liked to eat so I had him make him a little bit of everything just to be sure there was something you would like." Deeks explained.

"I can't believe you went through all this trouble just for a date with me. We could have easily just gone to the movies." Kensi said with a smile.

"That is what normal girls get are the movies, but a princess like you gets whatever her heart desires." Deeks said.

"That is possibly the sweetest thing I have ever heard."

"Besides a girl like you deserves a first date she will remember for the rest of her life." Deeks replied.

Kensi walked over to Deeks and wrapped her arms around his neck, "Nothing in the world could ever make me forget tonight, this is the best night of my life." Kensi said.

"Good, because my life's mission is to make you happy."

"Then let's eat cause I am starving."

Deeks laughed at Kensi. Once they were seated at the table with their plates, they ate in silence for about three minutes before Kensi decided to start talking again.

"So you know my dad is dead and my mom is…well I am not sure where my mom is right now actually. What about your parents where are they?" Kensi asked.

"My father is in jail, and as for my mom she is living with my aunt Barbara last I heard. But that was three years ago so I honestly don't know where she is." Deeks explained.

"What about Ray and Nicole? What is their story?" Kensi asked.

"Ray and I have been friends our entire life his dad was a piece of shit just like mine, his mom died when he was four. Nicole's father is also in jail, her mother remarried about three years after. So when they left for Vegas Nicole left with Ray. We are all just people the world has forgotten about." Deeks explained.

"I find it hard to believe that anyone could ever forget about you." Kensi replied.

After they had finished their dinner in Mike's place, they decided to walk the beach. It was quiet and peaceful at this time of night. Deeks had his arm draped over Kensi's shoulder and she had hers around his waist.

"Thank you for the best first date ever. I couldn't have imagined anything more perfect if I tried." Kensi replied.

"Is that the only date you have ever been on?" Deeks questioned.

"Yes. My dad didn't like the boys around here. I wish he would have met you. You could have changed his mind."

"You really think he would have liked someone like me?"

"I know he would." Kensi replied.

The two of them continued to walk the beach until two men approached them. Kensi could instictavely tell something was not right about these men. Deeks removed his arm from around Kensi's shoulder.

"Marty."

"What do you want?"

"You already know. Why don't you send your girl on somewhere so this don't get ugly." The older one said.

Deeks turned to Kensi, "Give me just a second princess then we will go home." Kensi opened her mouth to protest, but the fear in Deeks eyes told her not to. She nodded her head and walked towards the bench.

"Pretty thing you got there."

"You better stay the hell away from her." Deeks demanded.

"Hey you don't tell me what to do. I tell you what to do. And if I want your girl I will take her." The man said.

"The hell you will." Deeks said.

"I guess you forgot how this works Marty. You know I know where you live, I know everything about you, and if you don't do what I say that pretty little princess of your is going to be mine."

"I am not doing a damn thing for you."

"Get the girl." The older one said to his companion. Deeks grabbed him by the back of the shirt, and pulled him flat on his ass. "I said you stay the hell away from her. I am not kidding." Deeks shouted.

"You shouldn't have done that." He turned around and punched Deeks, this is when Kensi jumped up off the bench and took off running towards Deeks.

"What the hell are you doing?" Kensi screamed at the one who had just punched Deeks.

"Kens, don't." Deeks said as he reached up for her wrist. The one who had just punched Deeks reached out to grab him, Kensi grabbed his wrist and kneed him in the gut.

Deeks stood up and yanked Kenis by the arm as they took off away from the beach.

Kensi and Deeks ran hand in hand until they were sure they had lost the men from the beach.

"Come on Kens, we have to keep going until we get home." Deeks said as he pulled Kensi along behind him.

Once they had reached the house Deeks made sure to lock the doors behind them. "Ray, Ray where the hell are you?" Deeks shouted.

"Hey man, what's up?" Ray asked. When he came into the kitchen he noticed the look on Deeks face, and one similar on Kensi's face only with confusion added with the fear on hers.

"Jesse found Kensi and I on the way home." Deeks said.

"What?" Ray asked.

"Yeah!" Deeks said as he paced the kitchen angry.

"It's going to be ok man." Ray said trying to reassure his friend.

Deeks stopped dead in his track and turned to Ray. "Really? It's going to be alright? Ray you know how these people are. They threatened to take Kens. Don't tell me that its going to be alright! Alright?" Deeks shouted at Ray.

Kensi walked over to Deeks and placed both of her hands on the side of his face. "No one is taking me anywhere. Ok? I'm with you and that is where I will stay." Kensi said.

"Ok." Deeks repeated trying to calm his nerves down.

"Now will someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" Kensi questioned as she looked between Ray and Deeks for an answer.

Deeks looked to Ray, "Tell her." Ray responded.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews and for everyone who is still here with me on this. **

Deeks sighed and he looked up at Kensi with a serious expression. "Come on, let's talk." Deeks said as he took Kensi by the hand.

Kensi and Deeks left the kitchen and made their way upstairs to their room. Once they were inside of the room Kensi sat down on the bed. Deeks ran a hand through his hair and exhaled.

"I don't even know where to start."

"How about with who the hell is Jesse and what does he want from you?" Kensi suggested as she crossed her arms impatiently waiting for answers.

"Jesse is.. was a friend of mine and Ray's a long time. We all grew up together before we moved out here. Things at my home with my father were bad, really really bad Kens."

"I know, you told me how abusive he was." Kensi replied.

"But I didn't tell you the entire story of how we ended up out here. I don't know if you're ever going to look at me the same again when you find out what I have done."

"Hey come here." Kensi said reaching out for Deeks. Deeks gave in and walked over to the bed and sat down beside Kensi. "You just told me nothing could ever change the way you feel about me. What makes you think that the same doesn't apply to you?" Kensi explained.

"Alright. It was around eight that night when my dad came in. I remember because I had just looked at the clock on the stove before he opened the front door. Mom was in the kitchen just finishing dinner. Spaghetti she was cooking, it was his favorite." Deeks paused, reaching out he took Kensi's hand in his.

"He was drunk; you could smell the alcohol all over him as soon as he hit the door. He started screaming at mom for… you know I don't even know what he screaming at her for. She turned to me, told me to go to my room, and that she would call me when dinner was ready. I knew better then to argue with her when he was like this. As much as I didn't want to leave her alone I knew she didn't want me to see him like that. So I did what mom asked me and went to my room. I didn't shut the door all the way to my room; in fact I sat crouched right by it so I could hear downstairs. They argued and argued for what seemed like hours." Deeks said. He started nervously playing with Kensi's fingers on the hand he was holding.

"I started hearing dishes cracking, glass being shattered, and my mom. She was begging him to stop to just leave, to leave her and me alone. He told her he wouldn't leave and that the only way she would ever be free of him is if he was dead. I was sick of him beating my mom and having to watch him destroy her. My mom use to be this happy ray of sunshine. She always smiled even when she was dying inside; she never wanted me to know she was in pain. She never wanted me see her heart break. I got a gun from my room that Ray gave me for a birthday gift a few months before. I ran downstairs and I shot the fucker." Deeks explained. Deeks closed his eyes and he waited. He waited for Kensi to snatch her hand back, he waited for her to be disgusted with his actions, but she never was.

She tightened her grip on their entwined hands, and laid her hand on his shoulder. She wanted to say something to make him feel better; she wanted to tell him he was not alone. She had never been good with words. She didn't want to say she was sorry because that is what everyone said in a time like this. Sorry, I mean what would that change? Kensi reached out with her hand that was not currently locked with his and touched the side of his face. She turned his head so he was now looking into her eyes.

"I love you nothing can change that. Nothing." Kensi confessed.

Deeks smiled as three tears escaped his eyes. He took Kensi in his arms and held onto her like nothing else in the world mattered but her. Kensi could feel his silent tears escaping his eyes and meeting her neck. She held him while he cried, she held onto him why he shared his secrets with her.

"I didn't kill him if that is what you were thinking." Deeks said.

"Not even for a second." Kensi said.

"He ended up going to prison that night, my mom was a wreck after that. I don't know if she will ever be right again. Going through something like that changes a person. I couldn't stay there after what I did. I couldn't look at my mom and know the reason she was hurting was because of me." Deeks said.

"Hey, you didn't hurt her. You saved her." Kensi said.

"I condemned her to a life without the one she loved. There is nothing worse than that." Deeks said.

"Death is worse than that." Kensi said.

"Is it? I am sure I'd rather die than live without you." Deeks replied.

"Don't worry you will never be without me. What happened after you left?" Kensi asked.

"After I left the house that night, I told myself I would never go back; I never did. I went to Ray's stayed with him for a while. His life wasn't much better than the one I had left behind. So we decided we had enough. We were tired of being… whatever the hell it was we were. We decided one night no one would miss us if we left, so we did. We packed our shit, and we went and got Nicole. Ray said he would not leave without her, because no one would take care of her once he was gone." Deeks explained.

"I can't even imagine growing up like that." Kensi said sadly.

"We got our things and Nicole, and got the hell out of Eugene. We didn't have a plan yet, we wanted to go to California. Yeah real original, I know all the kids want to run away to California. We just wanted to start over, have a clean slate, be whatever it is we were supposed to be. But we never made it that far." Deeks explained.

"I take it this is where Jesse comes in?" Kensi asked.

Deeks turned on the bed so he was face to face with Kensi. He took both of her hands into his. "Yes it is. And it isn't pretty Kens, but now because of me you're in the middle of it."

"I trust you." Kensi said.

"Alright this is what happened..."

**A/N: So don't kill me for another cliffhanger but I had to end here. The next chapter will start with a flash back of the night they ran away and go from there. Hope you all enjoyed I am going to try and get the next one up as soon as possible, but my daughter is sick so forgive the delay if it takes a while. **


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Anyone who is still reading this story here you go finally a new chapter. Love to all you who have stayed with me.**

"_Get her so we can get the hell out of this town." Deeks said to Ray. The two of them approached Nicole's front door, any other time Ray would have gone to her window along the back of the house, but he knew her parents were away in Vegas and would not be back till Sunday night. This gave them chance to make their run with her. _

_Finally, after what seemed like a lifetime the young blonde opened the front door. _

"_What took you so long?" Ray asked. _

"_I was in the shower. What is wrong with you two?" Nicole asked noticing the looks on boys face. _

"_Do you remember how last month you said you wanted to get away? How you wished you could just disappear and start all over again?" Ray questioned. _

"_Yes I remember." _

"_This is your chance. Deeks and I are leaving town tonight. Don't know where we are going but we are not staying here any more." Ray explained to his girl. _

"_Why are you telling me this?" _

"_This is your chance. If you want to start over, if you want to leave this life behind you, then come with us. Let's disappear into the darkness and never look back. I want you to come with us. There will be no one left to take care of you when I am gone." _

"_Ok. Yes ok. Give me a few minuets to get my stuff." Nicole replied. _

"_Just get what you need don't bring unneeded stuff. This is must have only. Don't leave a note, we just vanish." Deeks explained. _

_Nicole nodded her head in agreement. _

Deeks had stopped talking long enough to see Kensi was hanging onto every word he said. He knew he had to do this, he knew they had to relive that horrible night that they all had tried to hard to forget. Now, Kensi was part of this, she was part of their life and if she was going to be chased around by these people then she at least had the right to know why they were after them.

"I am going to spare you the boring details and just get right to the part that matters. After Nicole had gathered her things we were headed out the door to leave. Just as we had reached the front door Jesse and his friends were waiting outside. Ray had been running with them sometime before, and things went down hill when Ray told them that he was leaving town. They had come over to Nicole's that night to take her. They thought that if they had her then Ray would not leave that he would have to do whatever they wanted him to do." Deeks explained.

Kensi stood up from the bed and started to pace circles on the bedroom floor.

"You guys didn't let them take her. Oh my god.." Kensi said when she started putting everything together that Deeks had been saying.

"Mark had grabbed Nicole, Jesse and I were arguing when this went down. Ray wasn't thinking right. I can't say that I blame him because God only knows what I would have done if it would have been you these guys would have grabbed. It all happened so quick, I didn't really know what happened until it was over. Ray was standing there over Mark; knife in hand blood all over his hands. Nicole's scream is what had captured my attention to what had happened."

"Now they are here. Why? No wait I already no why." Kensi replied. For the first time since Deeks had started telling this story he saw fear in the two toned eyes of his love.

"I won't let them hurt you. I swear my life on it Kens. No one will come near you." Deeks said.

"You can't know that. Look at what happened last time. I don't want you to kill someone over me I could never live with myself if I let that happened to you, if I let you go down that road you can never come back from it."

"Then we leave." Deeks suggested.

"Leave? How? Where will we go?" Kensi questioned.

"I don't know, it doesn't matter where we go as long as I have you nothing else matters to me anymore."

"Didn't you say something about California?" Kensi asked.

"It was a plan that Ray and I had when we left home."

"Then let's do it. Let's go to California. To Los Angeles, you can be surfer and I can…I can do whatever. Let's go tonight let's leave this place." Kensi said.

"You got it sweetheart. We will sleep for a few hours, and then we will slip out into the night and start all over again just you and me forever."

"I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Right back at you Kensalina." Deeks replied as he took her into his arms.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: This is the final chapter for this story. I honestly never thought I would get this one done, but new inspiration has allowed me to complete it. Hope that you all have enjoyed it and thank you for everyone who has been with me every step of the way. I love you all. **

He knew he should be sleeping considering all they had ahead of them. No matter how hard he tried he just couldn't sleep, all he could do was think about the girl he held in his arms. She had her eyes closed, and she looked so peaceful. She had her head resting on his chest, and her left hand tightly held onto his shirt. She was everything in this life that mattered to him. She was all he ever had ever wanted. His entire life he had always wondered what it was like to be loved. To love someone so completely that you would do anything for them.

It hurt him that he had brought her into this mess, but at the same time he was glad it was her here by his side. He trusted her in a way that he has never trusted anyone. Deeks had never been one for believing in destiny or fate, or whatever the hell it is that people call it, but he believed in her. That was enough for him, that was all it took. When two people believe in each other the way they did, then nothing in this world would or could keep them apart. Their hearts called out for each other, their destiny was clear, them against world was how it was going to be from now on.

Deeks reached out and gently pushed her hair behind her ears. This tender action made Kensi open her eyes.

"What is wrong?" She asked when she caught his blue eyes staring deep into her soul.

"Nothing. Everything is perfect. It's just as it should be."

"Are you afraid of leaving Ray and Nicole behind?" Kens questioned.

"No. The only thing that I am afraid of is living a life without you. I don't care where we go; I don't care about anything in life but you. You are my life now, and nothing in this world will ever break us."

"What makes that so beautiful is that it's true. I will follow you wherever you go." Kensi declared.

"Then lets do this. Let's make our own life starting now." Deeks said.

"I am ready." Kensi replied.

Kensi untangled herself from Deeks and climbed out of the bed. Deeks followed after her. He grabbed three bags they had packed earlier that night and slung them over his shoulder. Quietly they snuck downstairs, out the front door, and into the night. Nothing for them was clear now, nothing was guaranteed. The only thing they knew for sure was they loved each other and their love was something so powerful so real that most people only ever dreamed about.

Deeks reached out and took Kensi's hand as they walked down the darkened street of what use to be his neighborhood. They walked until the soft sounds that were familiar to them slowly started fading away. They walked past the park where fate or God or whoever it was brought them together the first time they met. They paused at the ocean and took one last look out.

"Will you miss this place?" Kensi asked.

"Parts of it I will, but its time to move on. I can't spend the rest of my life holding onto my past. There is a whole world out there for us to explore together."

They looked into each other eyes and smiled as they left everything they knew, everything that was familiar behind. They were starting over; they were free to be whoever it was they wanted to be. They didn't have anything but the few clothes they brought with them and each other. That is the funny thing about love, sometimes in life its all we ever really need.

Ray woke up that morning making his way downstairs he found a note sitting on the kitchen counter. Grabbing the note he read it over once and smiled. Nicole walked up and wrapped her arms around Ray. "Where are they?" She asked when she noticed that house was empty.

"They are gone." Ray said.

"What happens now?" Nicole asked.

Ray smiled and handed Nicole the note that Deeks left. Ray smiled at Nicole and said, "The possibilities are endless."

Nicole looked down at the paper she held in her hands and on it was written in all capital letters IT'S A LOVE STORY. Nicole smiled as she placed the paper back down where it was at before.

They say your destiny is already written, but destiny was a choice not a chance. She had always believed that, and he was the reason why.


End file.
