Mega Man 1. Great Teacher X

X: *Is walking down one of the hallways at hunter base*  
  
Signas: X wait up!  
  
X: *Turning around* Commander?  
  
Signas: X there's an assignment I need you to take care of  
  
X: Yes sir. What is it?  
  
Signas: Are you familiar with a reploid by the name of Bazooka Oni  
  
X: Yes sir, he's one of the instructors for new hunters. I'm one of his former students  
  
Signas: Yes well I regret to inform you that he went maverick yesterday  
  
X: What happened?  
  
Signas: From what I can gather from the reports of the students he came into the classroom, wote great teacher Onizooka (1) on the blackboard, and then went crazy on the students  
  
X: Was anyone hurt  
  
Signas: Well yes, Oni  
  
X: What?  
  
Signas: Oni was apparently getting on in years and he was reputed to be rather...strict in his old age  
  
X: If by strict you mean downright evil then don't blame it on old age, he was always like that, even while I was at school  
  
Signas: Yes well the other school faculty have told me as much in their complaints, and there have actually been quite a few of them to tell the truth  
  
X: So what DID happen with Oni  
  
Signas: Well once the students realized that Oni had gone maverick they exercised their right to use force to protect themselves from a maverick threat  
  
X: In other words they realized that the old coot had finally lost his mind and decided to put him out of his misery  
  
Signas: Yeah pretty much  
  
X: There wasn't much left of him when they were finished was there  
  
Signas: We couldn't find so much as two circuits to rub together  
  
X: Well I'm sure they enjoyed it, I always wondered when the old demon would go insane  
  
Signas: X how could you say such a thing!?  
  
X: Commander there hasn't been a student in Oni's class who hasn't dreamed of taking him. As a matter of fact it's a little known fact that Sigma went insane while in his class  
  
Signas: Yes well...  
  
X: *interrupting him* Uh commander how does this relate to the assignment you mentioned?  
  
Signas: Oh yes the assignment, your going to teach Oni's class  
  
X: I beg your pardon  
  
Signas: *Goes all official* X of the 17th unit you are hereby assigned to teach the class formerly in the tutelage of Bazooka Oni until a suitable substitute has been found  
  
X: But...but..who will lead the hunter's on missions?  
  
Signas: Zero of course  
  
X: *Sigh* Alright where's the lesson plan  
  
Signas: There is none  
  
X: What  
  
Signas: Well Oni hasn't used one for the last thirty years so there's none available  
  
X: But what am I supposed to teach them?  
  
Signas: Don't worry it's only for a few days, just improvise  
  
X: Improvise?   
  
Signas: Of course, we just need you to keep them occupied until a suitable replacement is found. No one really expects you to teach them much without anything to go on. Just keep them busy.  
  
X: Keep them busy...hmm I guess I can do that...  
  
Signas: Good man, now remember class starts tomorrow at 9:00 AM in room 302 and good luck *Walks away*  
  
X: Gee thanks I have a feeling I'm gonna need it.  
  
(1) Great teacher Onizuka or GTO is an anime about an ex-gangster turned teacher, in the first day his class he comes in and writes "Great teacher Onizuka" on the board before starting a very unorthodox lesson. Bazooka Oni is my MMX play of words on Onizuka's name 


	2. First Day

X: *Walks into the classroom*  
  
Students: *Stare at him*  
  
X: *Getting nervous* Um hello class  
  
Students: Good morning professor  
  
X: Please I'm not a professor  
  
Student A: Then please write the name you wished to be called on the board  
  
X: Oh right, thank you miss....  
  
Arrow: Arrow I'm the class president, just ask if you need anything  
  
X: Thank you *Writes a letter X on the board*  
  
Student B: X? Is that some kind of crazy nickname  
  
Arrow: What's your full name  
  
X: My full name is Megaman X but everyone just calls me X  
  
Students: *General uproar*  
  
Student B: You mean you're THE Megaman X  
  
Student C: Is it true you know Zero  
  
Student D: Did you really beat Sigma twenty times  
  
X: Um yeah I suppose that's me, Yes I know Zero he's my partner, and no it was only around six times  
  
X: Uh first let me take Attendance, Let's see Arrows here, Beam?  
  
Student B: Here  
  
X: Ok Ivy  
  
Student C: Here  
  
X: Blade  
  
Student D: Here  
  
X: Alright now before we begin are there any questions  
  
Beam: *Raises hand*   
  
X: Yes?  
  
Beam: Can I have your autograph  
  
X: Um yeah sure talk to me after class  
  
Ivy: Can you introduce me to Zero  
  
X: *Sweatdrop* I guess I could persuade him to come in sometime  
  
Ivy: YAY ^_^   
  
X: *Thinking* She must be one of the Zero fangirls I heard about  
  
Blade: Could you tell us about how you beat all the Mavericks  
  
X: *Remembering Signas's advice about just keeping them occupied* Uh yeah sure I guess I can tell you some stories. Where should I start?  
  
Beam: At the beginning  
  
Ivy: Tell us about Zero  
  
Blade: I wanna hear about all your big battles  
  
X: Okay, the first battle I was ever in was against a maverick named Vile. He was Sigma's second in command at the time and an ex-hunter himself  
  
Arrow: What happened  
  
X: Well Vile was notorious for piloting a mecha and when I fought him I couldn't damage him at all.  
  
Beam: How did you win  
  
X: I didn't, Vile used a paralyzing attack on me and had me in the grip of his mecha  
  
Blade: What happened?  
  
X: Zero rushed in and saved my sorry butt, he blasted the arm off Vile's armor carrier and forced him to retreat  
  
Ivy: Zero is SOOO brave  
  
X: Yeah, like I said he really saved me that day  
  
Arrow: What happened then?  
  
X: Well Zero went off to find where Sigma's base was located and I went off to destroy the maverick leaders  
  
Arrow: Which one did you go after first  
  
X: Chill Penguin  
  
Beam: I heard he was a tough fighter  
  
X: *Laughs* Actually getting thru his base was harder than the fight with him. See he was never equipped with an attack to hit someone clinging to a wall so all I had to do was climb up and wait for a clear shot  
  
Arrow: Alright that's one of them, who did you go after next  
  
X: Spark Mandrill, now that guy was A LOT tougher. He had an electric bubble mechaniloid guarding his base, and then he himself had some pretty powerful attacks. His one weakness was that he liked to fool around. He'd climb around on the wires in the ceiling and I was able to hit him while he was up there  
  
Blade: I heard there were eight in total, can you tell us about all of them  
  
X: Sure! The next one I went after was Armored Armadillo, he specialized in defense. His shell was almost impenetrable and I couldn't get a shot past his shields. So I started using some of the weapons I had gotten from the other two mavericks, Spark Mandrills weapon over loaded his circuits and without his armor it was easy to beat him   
  
Beam: Sweet!  
  
X: Yeah, Anyway I went after Launch octopus next. That battle was tough, she had an energy drain attack that stole almost all my energy. But she had a flaw in her fighting system that made her follow a strict pattern of movement. I just memorized it and used it to my advantage to win.  
  
Arrow: Interesting, go on.  
  
X: Well I fought Boomer Kawanger next, I nearly lost that fight. He could teleport around and ram into me, not to mention the fact that he was very good with his boomerang blade. That fight didn't really have much of a strategy we both gave it everything we had and I came out victorious  
  
Blade: Come on you must have had something to give you an edge  
  
X: Well there were the capsules  
  
Arrow: Capsules?  
  
X: My creator Doctor Light buried capsules all over the world. They contained upgrades for me like enhanced weapons and an acceleration system  
  
Blade: Yeah I guess that would work  
  
X: Right, Anyway Sting chameleon was the next Boss I went after. That guy used a special type of camouflage shield. He came out to attack me every now and then and I was able to hit him when he came out  
  
Arrow: That's six of the eight, who was next?  
  
X: Storm Eagle. I had to fight him on a plane and he kept trying to blow me off of it. But I found that if I got under his wind gusts I could attack him freely.  
  
Blade: Who was the last one  
  
X: Flame Mammoth, he was a HUGE maverick and kept trying to jump on top of me and crush me. His weight made him slow and I was able to evade his attacks and blast him  
  
Arrow: What did you do after you beat all the maverick leaders  
  
X: Well Zero found Sigma's base and we both stormed it. A little ways in we met up with Vile and Zero went on to fight him.  
  
Ivy: Zero fought? I bet he destroyed Vile  
  
X: Actually Vile managed to capture him in some capsule thingy. When Zero didn't come back I went in to see if I could help and had to battle Vile again, unfortunately I still couldn't get past his armor carrier  
  
Arrow: So what happened Zero couldn't save your butt  
  
X: He did as a matter of fact. While Vile was distracted he jumped onto the Armor carrier and self destructed   
  
Ivy: NO!  
  
X: *Nods Solemnly* I destroyed Vile but by the time I got to Zero it was to late he died in my arms.  
  
Ivy: WHAAA *Crying her eyes out*   
  
Blade: So if Zero died then who's the red guy with the blonde hair you work with?  
  
Arrow: If you paid ANY attention in history class you would know that commander Zero was put back together and resurrected a few weeks after the incident  
  
Beam: Well in that case you really can't call it dying then can you?  
  
Arrow: We'll discuss it in philosophy class  
  
Ivy: You mean Zero came back? *Sniff*  
  
Arrow: For the last time YES!  
  
Ivy: HA I knew Zero could overcome anything!  
  
Arrow: *Thinking* How did I get stuck with this bunch of loons?  
  
Blade: Well what happened after Zero died, finish the story professor...er I mean X  
  
X: Well I went thru the rest of Sigma's fortress and finally came face to face with him myself  
  
Blade: Ah now we get to the good part  
  
X: First he pitted me against his dog. The thing was a second rate contraption and I think Sigma was just playing around. Finally he pulled out his beam saber and took me on himself.  
  
Beam: How did it turn out  
  
X: Let's just say that by the time I was done with him all that was left was his head.  
  
Beam: SWEET!  
  
X: It wasn't over then though, Sigma had planned for his defeat. He fused his head with a huge wolf battle body that had been hidden in the base and the FINAL battle began  
  
Blade: Wait a sec. I've seen pictures of that body from when the excavated it. There's no way you could have beaten that huge thing.  
  
X: I can and I did  
  
Blade: No way, prove it!  
  
Arrow: It say's in your textbook that he did  
  
Blade: Still....  
  
Ivy: And he is Zero's partner, he must be something to be able to even keep up with Zero  
  
X: -_- Gee thanks  
  
Blade: Fine, fine I believe you.  
  
X: *Looks at the clock* Well were almost out of time, did I forget anything  
  
Beam: My autograph!  
  
X: *Sweatdrop* Oh right, *Signs Beams yearbook*   
  
Ivy: X can you please bring in Zero sometime?  
  
X: Hmm...I'll tell you what Ivy. Guess who's gonna be our guest speaker for tomorrow  
  
Ivy: You mean it? Zero? Here?  
  
X: Sure. *Thinking* Zero is gonna kill me....  
  
Bell: *Rings*  
  
X: Well that's all for today's class. I'll see you all tomorrow. 


	3. Zero

  
  


X: *Is at the gate to the hunter base*

  
  


Zero: *Comes riding into the base on a speeder bike*

  
  


X: Hey Zero!

  
  


Zero: *Get's off the bike* Hey X what's up?

  
  


Random hunters: *Swarm Zero*

  
  


R Hunter A: Zero you beat Sigma!

  
  


R Hunter B: Was the fight tough?

  
  


Zero: I'll tell you all about it later. *Grabs X and plows thru the crowd* 

  
  


X: Geez you'd think that they'd be used to it by now. I mean we've destroyed Sigma what? Six times now? Then again 'destroyed' isn't really the right word is it?

  
  


Zero: Yeah. I don't get it either. Now what did you want?

  
  


X: Well I have a favor to ask you.

  
  


Zero: Sure anything.

  
  


X: Will you come in and talk to my class as a guest speaker?

  
  


Zero: So the rumors are true, you got stuck with Oni's class

  
  


X: Yeah it's true, so will you do it.

  
  


Zero: Sure, Sigma won't be back for a few days at least. I'd be happy to help you out.

  
  


X: Thanks Zero I really appreciate this.

  
  


Zero: No problem, what are partners for? Well I have a few closeup reports to file. *Starts to walk away* See you later great teacher X

  
  


X: Great teacher X?.....

  
  


-Later-

  
  


X: *Walks into the classroom* good morning class....

  
  
  
  


Ivy: *Rushes past him to look around in the hallway* Is he here yet? Where is he? *Grabs X by the collar* Where. Is. Zero?

  
  


X: Relax he'll be here shortly.

  
  


Ivy: WHEN!?

  
  


X: Shortly!

  
  


Ivy: But...

  
  


Arrow: Ivy will you PLEASE sit down

  
  


Ivy: *Pouts* Fine

  
  


X: Alright, today my Partner Zero is indeed coming in to speak to all of you. However he still has some uh....things to take care of....

  
  


-Back in Zero's office*

  
  


Zero: *Is filling out a three foot stack of paper work* Hmm let's see...supplies used, blah, blah ,blah, Maverick's Retired, blah, blah, Damage taken, blah, blah, blah, blah....

  
  


-Back in X's class-

  
  


Ivy: What kind of thing?

  
  


X: Believe me you don't wanna know

  
  


Arrow: *Gives X an odd look* But according to protocol he should be simply filling out a little paper work. How hard could that be?

  
  


-Cutscene to Zero's office- 

  
  


Zero: *Finishes with the stack of papers and put them in a cart. Then turns around and grabs another stack from the huge mountain of papers behind him*

  
  


-Back in classroom-

  
  


X: Little paperwork? Is that what they're calling it now? Oh well while were waiting for our guest, can anyone tell me anything about Zero.

  
  


Ivy: *Stands up and get's sparkly eyes* He's tall, and handsome, and strong, and....

  
  


X: Anyone BESIDES Ivy?

  
  
  
  


Ivy: *Sits down and pouts*

  
  


Blade: He died

  
  


Arrow: Twice

  
  


Beam: I thought it was three

  
  


Arrow: No definitely two times

  
  


Beam: Really?

  
  


Blade: Yeah, once when he blew himself up and that one time when Sigma toasted him.

  
  


Ivy: Sigma couldn't 'toast' X much less zero 

  
  


X: -_- Gee thanks 

  
  


Blade: Oh yeah then what do you have to say about this! *Shows her a picture of zero after his fifth battle with sigma. (The one where all that's left of him is his upper body and even that has a big hole thru it)

  
  


Ivy: *Grabs picture* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

  
  


X: How did you get that?

  
  


Blade: *Takes back the picture and mutters something about connections in hunter organization*

  
  


Beam: So how did he come back that time?

  
  


X: *Shrugs* Ask him when he get's here. All he'll tell me is that he was hiding to repair himself.

  
  


Arrow: But I heard that you had all memory of him erased after the encounter and your system refused to intake any data about him?

  
  


X: Yeah it did.

  
  


Arrow: Then how come in your next mission it stated that your mission was to 'find' Zero. If your system refused to admit he existed how could you go on a mission to find him?

  
  


X:.....Hey you feel that?

  
  


Blade: Yeah...felt like some kind of disturbance in the fabric of our reality

  
  
  
  


Ivy: What?

  
  


Blade: It's a plot hole...

  
  


All: Oh

  
  


Beam: Well that explains a lot.

  
  


Door: *Knock knock*

  
  


X: Ivy I think you should...greet...our guest 

  
  


Ivy: Right. *Get's into a racers crouch in front of the door*

  
  


Blade: *Holds a checkered flag*

  
  


Arrow: On your mark,...get set....

  
  


X: *Opens door* 

  
  


Blade: *Swishes flag*

  
  


Arrow: GO

  
  


Ivy: *Charges at the person behind the door and knocks them to the floor* Zero! I'm your biggest fan! I think your SO brave and strong and....

  
  


Signas: I'm flattered Miss but I'm not Zero.

  
  


Ivy: *Jumps up off him* Ehehe sorry ^^;

  
  


Signas: I take it your Ivy. Well just so you know Zero is on his way and should be here in five minutes. I just came by to check on X.

  
  


X: I'm fine sir...and uh sorry about that little incident. We were trying to...uh surprise Zero

  
  


Signas: Well far be it from me to spoil the fun, I'll just leave now. That was quite a nice tackle by the way miss Ivy. *Leaves*

  
  


-Five minutes later-

  
  


Zero: *Opens the door to X's class and is knocked back into the hallway by blur* 

  
  


Ivy: ZEEEEERRRRRRO!

  
  


Zero: Err X...one of your students has attached themselves to me...

  
  


X: ^_^ Err yeah...surprise...

  
  


Zero: Uh huh thanks. *Looks down at Ivy* Miss do you think I could have me back now?

  
  


Ivy: *Jumps off and goes back into the classroom giggling*

  
  


X: *Walks with Zero back into the classroom* Class I'd like you to meet our guest speaker for the day, Commander Zero.

  
  


Zero: Hello everyone. *Gives a wave*

  
  


X: Does anyone have any questions for our guest?

  
  


Arrow: Who actually made you?

  
  


Zero: I...honestly don't know

  
  


Blade: How did you come back the second time you were killed.

  
  


Zero: ^^ I err...dunno that either. I sorta just woke up.

  
  


Beam: Who's stronger you or X

  
  


Arrow: BEAM!

  
  


X and Zero: *Look at each other*

  
  


X: I'm not sure

  
  


Zero: We'll have to find out sometime

  
  


X: Yeah I guess

  
  


Ivy: ^^ How do you get your hair like that.

  
  


Zero: . Um...I guess this is just the way it is

  
  


Ivy: *Sighs*

  
  


X: Any other questions?

  
  


Beam: Why don't you two duke it out now, the training center is open

  
  


X: Err...

  
  


Zero: Oh why not X, I'm stiff from all that paperwork and you have class time to burn

  
  


X: Well...ok

  
  


Ivy: Ten bucks on Zero

  
  


Beam: I'll take that bet, my moneys on X

  
  


Arrow: Hey now they'll be none of that... *Whispering* Put me down for ten on Zero, I have no respect for gun over swords.

  
  


X: *Oblivious to all of this* Well come on everyone *Walks out with Zero*

  
  


Zero: A bit of advice X you might want to look into more creative lessons if your looking for guest speakers already.

  
  


X: Leave me alone I'm not used to this.

  
  


Zero: I know, but look, if you need a day off to plan I'll fill in for you

  
  


X: Really? Thanks Zero I owe you one.

  
  


-They arrive with the class at the training room-

  
  


Zero: Well here goes nothing *Walks in with X and shut the door behind them*

  
  


Arrow: *Sits in the control chair and pulls up some screens* Are you two ready

  
  


X: Miss Arrow what are you doing

  
  


Arrow: Well SOMEONE has to control the training settings while you two are in there.

  
  


X: Oh right...well just put us on a basic setting and monitor

  
  


Arrow: *Fiddling with some hologram buttons* Check, your ready to go.

  
  


Beam: X is going to win I just know it

  
  


Ivy: *Whacks him over the head* No way Zero will crush X *Sparkly eyes*

  
  


Arrow: They're just sparring! *Looks at the screen* and right now they're just about even.

  
  


Blade: I wonder how this will turn out...


End file.

Mega Man, Humor