1. Chapter 1

**One Sentence Words - the Epsilon Set**

These were inspired by ezaspi, who posted a set of these and a delta set at her livejournal (also known as the sentences of doom. :) ) These ones are optimistic and generally have a happy theme. They are not connected in any way, nor do they follow a timeline. They're just fun speculations on where Lee and Kara's relationship might go.

Spoilers: Everything so far, but the future speculations are all my own. (Ron Moore doesn't seem inclined to make my favourite pilots get together any time soon so I have to do it myself.)

**ooooooooooooooooooooooo**

**01. Motion - **Everyone who watched them thought they'd never stop their wildly spinning circles long enough to intersect, but they were wrong.

**02. Cool -** Space was the only place they could be together where the heat between them wasn't overwhelming.

**03. Young -** He knew it was a traitorous thought, especially to have about his own brother, but every day they spent together he wished _he'd_ met her first.

**04. Last - **The last thing he saw every night was her face through the open curtain, only peaceful in slumber.

**05. Wrong -** It had taken a long time for them to iron out the kinks in their relationship, but once they had, she began to wonder if maybe she'd met the wrong brother first.

**06. Gentle -** The gentleness of his hands on her body belied the fiery passion that existed between them.

**07. One - **It had taken her over two years and one failed marriage to admit it, but she finally admitted _he_ was the one.

**08. Thousand - **He was nothing if not anal - it was exactly one thousand days from the time of the first cylon attack to the day he proposed to her.

**09. King -** His father may have been his commanding officer but when he lay in his bunk with her in his arms, he felt like a king.

**10. Learn - **He thought he was fairly good at pleasing a woman in bed but she showed him he still had a lot to learn.

**11. Blur -** Life was always a blur when she was around but Lee wouldn't have it any other way.

**12. Wait - **He'd only known her a few short years but it seemed like he'd been waiting for her all his life.

**13. Change -** Lee watched silently, a small smile on his face as Kara nursed their daughter, marveling at how much different she was now from the time they'd first met six years ago.

**14. Command -** Lee had been reluctant to take command in the beginning, doing it only because he had to, but it was her support and belief in him that made him a good leader.

**15. Hold -** When he saw her lying on that stretcher, bruised and beaten, all he wanted to do was take her in his arms and hold her forever.

**16. Need -** The day things finally changed was the day she broke down and admitted she needed him.

**17. Vision - **As she walked down the aisle towards him, all in white, he suddenly had a vision of them with twin girls, all smiles, with blonde ponytails blowing in the wind.

**18. Attention -** He figured he had to do something really out of the box to get her attention, not realizing that her focus had been on him all the time.

**19. Soul - **Apollo and Starbuck, Lee and Kara, one soul split into two bodies, always striving to find a way back together again.

**20. Picture -** He knew things had begun to change when he caught a glimpse of the picture in her locker and realized she'd folded it the _other_ way - so only Kara and himself were showing.

**21. Fool - **He'd been a fool to think she wanted him, till the day he almost hadn't come back and she'd thrown herself on him and kissed him madly, right in front of the deck crew, the other pilots ... and even his father.

**22. Mad -** It was hard to stay mad at him when he fixed her with 'the look' from his deep, ocean-blue eyes.

**23. Child - **The thought of having children had always been abhorrent to her, but as her belly began to swell with Lee's baby, she found herself smiling at it and stroking it in amazement and awe.

**24. Now - **Kara was never one to wait; once they'd decided to get married, she wanted to do it _now_.

**25. Shadow - **Sometimes after they made love, Lee thought he could see the shadow of his dead brother standing at the foot of the bed - and he was always smiling.

**26. Goodbye - **They'd both thought it was goodbye when she'd left Galactica and moved down to the planet but looking back they could see that that had just been the beginning of their newfound relationship.

**27. Hide - **The day she stopped trying to hide and left everything out in the open for him to see was the day he finally knew it might be possible for them.

**28. Fortune -** It was always fun winning at cards against Starbuck, but the day she threw herself in as the ante was the day he knew he'd be reaping and immeasurable fortune.

**29. Safe - **That first touch, the seemingly endless handshake, after the end of the worlds made her feel safe, even though the struggle for survival was only just beginning.

**30. Ghost - **She'd always let the ghost of Zack come between them and prevented the inevitable from happening, till one night she had a dream where Zack gave them his blessing ... then she finally gave in.

**31. Book -** He'd always been jealous of her reputed prowess in bed, until the night she pulled out 'the book' and told him she wouldn't die a happy woman till they'd tried each and every position.

**32. Eye -** He had the most beautiful eyes of anyone in existence, hands down; she knew, she'd stared at them enough.

**33. Never -** She'd sworn never to fall in love with another Adama but it had proven to be a promise she couldn't keep.

**34. Sing -** The other pilots were shocked to hear singing coming from Lee's shower stall, considering he'd broken up with Dee only two days earlier.

**35. Sudden -** Every one who watched Lee and Kara together thought their flirtation was very sudden but that's because they didn't know that it had been going on for years already, before he ever came to Galactica.

**36. Stop -** Tigh tried to put a stop to the illicit love affair going on between the CAG and his lead pilot, but some things in life are just unstoppable.

**37. Time -** Time always seemed to stand still when she was out fighting and he stood in CIC listening to the comm chatter helplessly.

**38. Wash - **She watched as Lee sat in the tub with their son, rough calloused hands touching the fragile skin ever-so-gently.

**39. Torn - **Lee was about to tear up the piece of paper with Kara and Anders' names on it ... till he realized it was a divorce decree.

**40. History - **Kara would never admit it to anyone, even herself, but the main reason she would never let herself love Lee was because she was afraid history was going to repeat itself.

**41. Power -** As CAG, Lee knew he hadn't had much power; as Commander he definitely had much more, but he didn't truly understand what power was until his daughter was born ... and everything else suddenly took second place.

**42. Bother -** Kara loved to hang out in his office while he did paperwork, trying her hardest to bug him, but she never did figure out that he enjoyed it.

**43. God -** Everyone else thought he was as close to a god as you could get, from his callsign down to his behaviour, but only Kara knew how naughty he _really_ was.

**44. Wall - **The wall that had erected itself between them when Kara confessed her part in Zack's death took a long time to breach but once it cracked, things changed drastically ... for the better.

**45. Naked -** he listened to the comments the other pilots made about her naked body, smiling to himself as he thought of just how many times that naked body had lain beside his, covered in a sheen of freshly-frakked sweat.

**46. Drive -** The other pilots took bets on who would drive whom nuts first but Lee and Kara never bothered joining in the speculation - they knew themselves well enough to know that they were already nuts and didn't need each other's help.

**47. Harm - **For months during her pregnancy, Kara had had nightmares about hurting her baby once it was born the way her mother had hurt her, but the first glimpse of her newborn son threw all those fears to the wind - she knew she would never harm this precious gift the gods had given them.

**48. Precious - **As Lee gazed into the deep blue eyes of their newborn son, he knew this was the most precious thing in his life - something had finally superseded Kara.

**49. Hunger - **Five years of marriage and two children later, the fiercely passionate hunger they had for one another hadn't abated in the slightest.

**50. Believe - **As they looked back on the twenty years they'd spent together, it was hard to them to believe that there had been a time when they were sure it wasn't meant to be for them.


	2. 25 Shadow

**#25 - Shadow - Expanded**

**oooooooooooooooo**

Lee lay quietly in the dark, listening to Kara's breathing deepen and even out. The sweat from their recent lovemaking slid down his temples and splashed on the pillow, but holding her tightly in his arms was much more important than wiping the beads of remembrance away.

It had taken him a long time to get her to trust him - _a long time_ - she'd been close back that first year before he'd screwed up so royally on Colonial Night, but ever since she returned from Caprica, they'd grown further and further apart until the chasm had been too great to bridge.

It had taken their mutual grief - the death of his father - to bring them together again. His sudden heart attack had taken everyone by surprise.

Dee hadn't understood how his father's loss could cut him so deeply, as all Lee had seemed to want was to prove he didn't need his father while he was still alive.

Kara had had no one to share her grief with. Sam had perished much earlier during the cylon occupation, and at the funeral it was plain as day to Lee that she needed someone. The loss of the only father-figure she'd ever known hit her harder than she ever could have imagined, and she was a wreck.

So Lee and Kara clung to each other, the only two who really understood what they were going through, needing and drawing support and love from each other in their loss. Somewhere along the line, hitting them both unawares, they realized there was more to it than just sympathy and comfort. And though they'd both fought it before, they now embraced it whole-heartedly. They were family; they belonged together.

Lee blinked a few times, positive he must be dreaming as he saw a vision of light at the end of his bed.

It was Zack.

Lee coloured slightly - he hadn't thought much lately of the fact that the love of his life had also been his brother's.

Zack was smiling. Then he began to speak quietly. _She's one in a million Lee. Take good care of her for me._

"I will little brother," Lee promised softly. "I will."

_ fin _


	3. 28 Fortune

**#28 - Fortune - Expanded**

**oooooooooooooooooooooo**

"I call."

Lee's gaze flicked over to Kara, wondering if she was bluffing or not. She was chewing her lip nervously, and that made Lee smile inwardly.

This was the worst game of triad she'd ever played to his knowledge. Even Hotdog had won several hands, and that was unheard of for the guy who had yet to learn the meaning of the phrase 'triad face'.

One by one they lay out their hands, and somewhat to his amazement Lee won again. He already had a hefty sized pile of winnings in front of him and was beginning to contemplate exactly what treasures he'd be able to glean with it.

"Well folks, it seems like we're winding down here," he said cockily, gathering his pile up. "You've all pretty much lost your shirts tonight. Even Starbuck doesn't have a thing left to bet with."

"Wanna bet?" she said belligerently, the familiar gleam in her eye that always spelled trouble for Lee.

"Holding out on us Starbuck?" Gaeta asked, quirking an eyebrow at her.

"I saved the best for last." She beamed proudly. "Deal up the cards Apollo. One last hand - winner takes all."

Gaeta and Hotdog both pushed their meagre piles in while Lee eyeballed his larger pile for a minute. He looked up at her.

"So, what's your ante?" he demanded.

"Me. Whoever wins gets me for the night."

Hotdog's eyes widened larger than Lee had ever seen them. Judging by the way the man began to wriggle in his seat, it wasn't the only part of him that was expanding.

Lee glanced at Gaeta surreptitiously. He acted nonchalant but there was a faint blush to his usual olive cheeks.

Lee himself felt a tightening in his groin at the thought. Maybe it was best for all concerned if 'for the night' was clarified. He didn't want anyone ending up in sickbay because of a misinterpretation - himself included.

"By 'for the night' you mean ..." he prompted.

"Me. All night. To do with what you will." Her eyes sparkled with glee. Typical Starbuck.

He pushed his substantial pile to the middle of the table. "I'm in," and was satisfied to note that she blushed and looked down as if embarrassed._ Gods, I have to win now, please ..._

The hand went slowly, teasingly by as the room seemed to heat up enormously. By the time the last card was dealt, all three men were virtually unable to sit still in their chairs.

"What have you got?" Lee asked Gaeta, to his left.

Gaeta spread his cards out, sighing in resignation as Hotdog grinned.

"Hotdog?"

He threw his cards down with a big smile. "Beat that!" he crowed triumphantly.

Kara laid her cards down next. Best hand she'd had all night. Hotdog's face fell.

"It's all up to you now Apollo. Can you beat my full house?" she boasted, sure of herself as a wide grin spread across her face, lighting up the entire room.

Lee's eyebrow raised. He kept a straight face though his heart was pounding in anticipation.

"Read 'em and weep Starbuck. Full colours." He laid his hand down and finally allowed himself to smile.

Kara made a big pretense of groaning as the other men began to tease her, but Lee had seen the telltale grin and sparkle of her eyes before she covered her face with her hands - _she'd wanted him to win._

It was always fun winning at cards against Starbuck, but the day she threw herself in as the ante was the day he knew he'd be reaping an immeasurable fortune.

_ fin _


	4. 21 Fool

**#21 Fool - Expanded**

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

He'd been a fool. As usual.

It had been such a bumpy ride between them - ups and downs galore, though many more downs it seemed recently.

He'd thought maybe it could be between them ... then she'd brought home Anders and dangled him in Lee's face. So Lee had gone elsewhere.

But as with everything else in Lee's life, it hadn't worked out the way he'd wanted it to, so it had ended.

Apparently hers hadn't worked out either. Who'd have figured that marriages made in desperate situations wouldn't have lasting potential?

So she'd come back and after much working out of the kinks, they'd fallen back into their old relationship, and Lee had thought ...

But he'd been a fool. She'd fooled him once again by appearing to care but pulling away whenever he tried getting closer.

And then it had happened. His wing had been clipped in a firefight and his ship had been damaged enough that he wasn't sure if he could make it back._ It's okay, Starbuck will come pull your ass out of the fire, she always ..._

The sudden realization that his wingman - the _only_ one he truly trusted out here, _wasn't _out here. After her bout with pneumonia, the doc hadn't been willing to clear her for flying and she was up in CIC listening, not out here where he needed her most.

For a moment he let his mind wander ... back to the Blackbird ... back to the Resurrection Ship ... back to the last time he'd felt hopeless. And he was tempted to just let go again and let them blow him away.

Reality crashed in as he saw a stream of enemy fire headed straight for him._ I don't want to die,_ he thought longingly, suddenly throwing himself back into it whole-heartedly.

The first person he saw when the crew forced the canopy open was his father, lines of worry etched in his already lined face. He climbed down the stairs slowly, sharing a look with him when suddenly he was hit broadside and pinned to the raptor beside him.

Hot lips found his and kissed him passionately as arms squeezed him in a bone-crushing hug.

For a moment he was too stunned to respond and just stared as Kara attacked him in front of the crew, other pilots ... and even his father.

He kissed her back and slid his arms around her waist.

Finally she pulled back for air. "Don't you ever do that to me again you son of a bitch," she growled, passion burning in her eyes. "I won't lose you!"

His arms tightened around her and pulled her even closer as their lips locked again.

He smiled - maybe he wasn't such a fool after all.

fin


	5. 29 Safe

**#29 - Safe - Expanded**

**ooooooooooooooooo**

"Hey."

She was sure her heart stopped. Literally.

There were no such thing as ghosts, right? So why was Lee Adama, the man everyone believed dead, standing looking down on her like she was the most precious thing in the universe?

She took his proferred hand and he pulled her up, surprisingly not letting go once she was on her feet.

He looked awfully good for a dead man.

Their eyes locked in as firm a grip as their hands were. Warmth and strength flowed through both connections.

"I thought you were dead."_ Come on Thrace, is that the best you can do?"_

"Well, I thought you were in hack." _At least he's as lame as you are._

The handshake seemed to go on forever. He didn't make a move to withdraw his hand and quite frankly she didn't want him to. The solid 'realness' of his touch was warming her to the core.

She could deal with the cylons annihilating their homeworld; she'd already dealt with Zack's death (in her own warped way), but she'd had trouble facing the fact that Lee was gone too, so quickly after they'd reunited.

Her world had always been a shaky one, right from childhood on, but once she'd met and become part of the Adama family, so to speak, she'd found an anchor of safety and shelter. Lee was a part of that. Sure they fought and said nasty things to each other, but it was all part of what they were. Underneath the fighting and banter there was a solid foundation of friendship - the one thing she needed most right now.

As they talked and his eyes roamed over her face and upper body, she felt a thrill of excitement - one she probably shouldn't, given that he was Zack's brother, but she couldn't help herself.

Maybe it would happen between them, maybe it wouldn't, but the one thing she _did_ know for a certainty was that he would be there for her. And that made her feel happy. And safe, despite their circumstances. Life was about to become an almost insurmountable challenge, but with Lee by her side, anything was possible.


	6. 38 Wash

**#38 - Wash - Expanded**

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

She peered into their quarters tentatively, wondering what she would find there.

The sounds surprised her before she ever had a chance to glimpse the precious tableaux. Water splashing, vague cooing noises and her husband, murmuring platitudes softly.

She opened the door to the washroom area slowly so as not to disturb them.

Lee sat in the tub with their son, rough, calloused hands touching the fragile skin ever-so-gently.

"Water is good. It feels nice and warm on your sweet, soft skin," he murmured, fingers softly rubbing the new, wrinkled skin to cleanse it.

Kara smiled in wonder. She had, of necessity, been the one to take of their son most of the time, as only three weeks after his birth, she hadn't yet been cleared to fly. Lee, being the CAG and acting XO, had had an incredible amount to do, not even including finding ways of replacing her in the flight schedule. This after noon had been the first time he'd had a few hours off and Kara had gone for lunch with Helo and had had a doctor's appointment, leaving the two of them alone to bond for the first time.

She'd never expected Lee would give him a bath though. She didn't know he even knew _how_. The nurses had had to show her what to do and she'd found it a harrowing experience handling a wet, slippery newborn who cried like his lungs were on fire eery time she brought him near the water.

But here he was, resting happily in his father's arms as the two of them sat in a heavy, metal tub filled half full of warm water.

"See? It's loads of fun sweetheart. Water is a wonderful thing. In time you'll come to appreciate it as much as we do."

Kara cleared her throat. He looked up at her bemused face and smiled.

"Did you have a good afternoon?"

She jiggled her head around in a non-answer. "It was quiet."

"Do you want him?" Lee looked down at his son lovingly.

"No, he seems perfectly content with you." She sat cross-legged on the floor nearby. "Carry on."

_ fin _


	7. 4 Last

#4 - Last - Expanded

oooooooooooooooo

It had been a wearying day. But then again, how many of them_ hadn't_ since the end of the worlds?

People had said they were glad things slowed down after the five days of constant cylons attacks were over, but for Lee they hadn't gotten any less busy. Or stressful. Actually he'd found the attacks every thirty-three minutes rather soothing in a way, truth be told. At least _then _he'd known what to do and had done it, mostly on instinct.

Now he was stuck in a job he didn't really fit into, wasn't quite sure how to perform and quite frankly didn't want. He'd never told anyone but he really didn't want to be doing this anymore. His dislike of the military and of following in his father's footsteps had overridden his joy in flying, and he'd been preparing to resign ... before circumstances went and changed his life.

In some ways he couldn't complain though - he had Kara, and though she'd teased him about the job, she'd helped him immeasurably with understanding Galactica's pilots, whom he didn't know, and with getting them to obey his orders. In fact, she'd been working as hard as he had these past weeks, and it showed in the taut way she held her body and the lines of strain on her face. The face which only appeared calm and peaceful in slumber.

Every night before closing his eyes, he looked across the room to her bunk, comforted by her presence and glad that she could find_ some_ peace - even if it was only in dreams.

_ fin _


	8. 1 Motion

**#1 - Motion - Expanded**

This is for roofietoof who has spent a lot of time reading and reviewing these lately and specifically asked for 'motion' to be next. :)

**ooooooooooooooooooooo**

Is it ever going to actually happen? Adama wondered, watching them yet again. Apollo and Starbuck, Lee and Kara - two halves of the same soul. Apollo and ARtemis, he'd taken to calling them. Only to himself of course - they would have taken offence at anyone even remotely suggesting there was anything to 'them', other than two people who enjoyed flying together.

But for those watching them, well, it was something different entirely. he himself had tried to think of poetic ways to describe them but he was a practical man and the best he could come up with was to say they were like magnets. Magnets with opposite charges who drew each other closer and closer but whose charges suddenly flipped when they touched, and then pushed each other away. Maybe it wasn't totally accurate but it was damn close according to what he was seeing.

He'd been watching them for months, their orbits colliding then pulling apart, wondering if they could ever let go of the baggage that always stood between them and happiness together. He knew Zack was a big part of it and felt a little odd about that himself, but it was obvious to see, when one took the time to observe closely, that Lee and Kara were definitely opposite sides to the same coin; two souls divided who were spinning out of control in their haste to deny the truth. But true it was, and though he'd been prepared to see Kara as part of Zack's life, he now knew that she belonged with Lee.

It took them more than a year, surviving vast rifts in their relationship, and failed relationships with others to see it, but they finally had. Both of them. And their wildly spinning circles stopped as two soul-mates were joined back into one whole being again.

fin


	9. 31 Book

**#31 - Book - Expanded**

**ooooooooooooooooooo**

"Can we try it like this?" she asked, moving into position over him. "I like it like this." She gave him a sultry smile, hoping he'd be turned on by her forwardness. Men usually were, and in her experience they'd preferred being told what she liked - no chance of her being left wanting when they were done.

"Sure," Lee said, giving her a small smile. "Whatever you like."

Kara sat back on his legs, studying him. Something wasn't right.

"Okay, what is it?" she demanded

"What is what?" he asked, perplexed.

"What's bothering you? You've got that 'look'."

He raised himself up onto his elbows. "What look?" There was irritation in his voice now.

"The 'look' that says you're not happy with me. The 'look' that says you're going along with whatever I want but inside something's upsetting you." She crossed her arms over her chest. "So give - what is it?"

"How is it I'm so easy to read?" he asked, a trace of amusement creeping back into his voice.

"You're not." She leaned forward and kissed him on the tip of the nose. "Unless you're me, then you, Lee Adama, are an open book."

"With well worn pages?" He smiled.

She sat back and made an exaggerated show of studying him physically.

"Slightly used, but definitely not worn," she smirked. "I aim to fix that though."

Her smile faded slightly as she saw the veil drop down over his eyes again, covering something he wanted to hide from her.

"Okay, what is it?' she said, in an exasperated voice, climbing off him and standing arms akimbo beside the bed.

"What is _what_?" he repeated, sounding just as exasperated, and sitting up to face her.

"Tell me what's bothering you, because _something_ obviously is."

He rose to stand before her. "There's nothing bothering me."

"You're a liar Adama," she challenged, waiting for his response.

"I'm a ...? Fine, you want to know what's bothering me?"

"That's why I asked," she said condescendingly.

"It bothers me that every time we make love you talk about previous times for you."

At her look of confusion he carried on.

" ' I like it like this', or 'this is my favourite'. How am I supposed to feel when I know you've had sex with maybe every other guy on this ship? And then you tell me which ones you liked and didn't like?"

"I never mentioned names." She waited, then her face broke into a huge grin at his shocked expression.

"I'm kidding." She moved closer and reached for his hands, linking their fingers together. "I haven't slept with every guy on this ship. Very few in fact, and I'm not trying to make you feel bad, it's just that ..."

An idea suddenly struck her and she pulled way and turned to rummage in the bottom of her locker.

"What? It's just what? What are you doing?" Lee demanded.

"Aha!" she said triumphantly, a small black leather-bound book in her hand. "Here it is."

"Here what is?"

Kara smiled seductively. "I won it in a game of triad. Long before you came here."

"So, what's in it?"

"See for yourself." She tossed it and he caught it neatly and opened it, eyes widening further than she'd ever seen them.

"My gods Kara, it's a ..."

" ... sex book." She smirked. "There are one hundred positions in it."

"You've memorized it?" he asked incredulously.

She blushed. "No, just perused it a few times. I've never actually ... _tried_ any of them ..." she added, squirming slightly.

"You haven't?" The confidence was coming back to him. "So why did you say ..."

"I've imagined some of them." Her cheeks were definitely rosy now. "And there were a few I just really wanted to try. With you." Her eyes slid down to the ground. For some reason talk of sex embarrassed her far more than the act itself.

Lee stepped forward and lifted her chin with a finger, forcing her to look at him.

"Only a few?" he asked quietly, mouthing working to hold back a smirk.

She leaned forward and kissed him, full and passionately, and Lee felt himself begin to stir at the feel of her tongue in his mouth.

"Just a few _tonight._ I swear to you Lee Adama, I will not die a happy woman until we've tried every single position in that book."

He slid his arms around her waist, pulling her close against his aroused body.

"Let's get busy then shall we? I refuse to see you die without a smile on your face."

_ fin _


	10. 23 Child

**#23 - Child - Expanded**

**oooooooooooooooooo**

"You sure are taking up a lot of space in there kid," Kara said to her swollen belly as she stood naked in their quarters looking at herself in the mirror.

When she'd discovered she was pregnant five months earlier, despite regular birth control shots, the news had been bittersweet. Lee had smiled wider than she'd ever seen him smile before, and an aura of sheer male pride at being able to procreate had permeated his whole being almost immediately.

The old man had been ecstatic. She'd never even seen him in a fatherly role, as he and Lee had been on more formal terms since they were all stranded on Galactica, but it seemed being a grandfather was something he'd been looking forward to. And he confided to her one day when they were having dinner alone together, that _she_ was the one he'd hoped Lee would settle down with. She was perfect for him, he'd said - she challenged him and made him work harder than he'd ever had to before. She scratched the surface of the 'by-the-book, do things the proper way' Lee and knew him better than anyone. And of course the old man himself adored her as well. He'd let her know in no uncertain terms that a child cut from the cloth of Kara and Lee's personalities would be something he would be immensely proud of.

But Kara herself had been wary. She'd not wanted to have children for a long time and was still unsure if it was to be a part of their future until it was thrust upon her and she had no choice. She'd never have considered abortion, even if it was legal or available - it was _Lee's_ child, a part of _him_ growing inside her, but it took her many months to warm to the idea.

Now she stood before the mirror, stroking her growing belly. It was the first time she'd looked at herself and saw a mother and child symbiotically entwined, rather than a woman whose flat stomach and rippling muscles were disappearing under new curves and stretch marks.

"After all the work I'm putting in here, you'd better grow strong and healthy," she said softly, eyes glimmering with tears. "And I sure hope you're as pretty as your dad."

fin


	11. 32 Eye

#32 - Eye - Expanded

oooooooooooooooooo

She stared at the bunk above, lost in thought.

Azure. Ocean-blue. Cerulean blue. Cloudless-sky-out-on-the-prairies-blue. Steel blue. Sapphire blue. Midnight blue. Ice blue. Come-frak-me-till-I'm-dead-on-the-floor-blue ... no wait, that wasn't really a colour.

She chuckled, eyes closing at the thought. That was so ... not like Lee. He was way too straight-laced to frak a woman senseless on the floor.

"Too bad," she sighed wistfully to herself. "I could really make it worth his while ..."

She drifted back off into thoughts of just how exceedingly intense, piercing and just damn pretty those eyes were, not noticing someone else had entered the room and shut the hatch quietly till she felt the mattress sag beside her.

She jumped, startled. "Lee!"

"Did I scare you?" _Laughing blue ... gods help me!_

"I was just thinking."

A pause, eyes locked, narrowing in, searching, finding ...

"Cubit for your thoughts."

"Wha ...?" She pulled herself out of those deep, crystal clear pools of blue with extreme effort.

"What were you thinking about?" Lee tried again, his eyes twinkling with a smile.

"I ... nothing ... I was just ... it was nothing," she stammered lamely.

"Really." His word said he believed her, but his eyes ... oh those eyes! Impossible to lie to those eyes. So pretty, so very, very pretty. And demanding. She liked demanding. Demanding wasn't a pushover like most men. Demanding was good. It meant he was a challenge.

"Really." She gave him her most 'Starbuck' smile.

"Really?" He leaned in, so close she nearly drowned in those eyes. "I don't believe you."

"You don't?"

"I don't." His tone was mild, but the eyes were challenging her to tell him the truth. Well, why not ...

She leaned up on her elbows so they were nearly nose to nose. "What if I told you I was thinking about you frakking a woman senseless on the floor?"

His eyes flared wide and dark, surprise masking some other emotion he was trying not to share. His breath was warm on her mouth and his eyes pierced her like arrows. _The arrow of Apollo? _she suddenly thought, and couldn't suppress a chuckle as the double-entendre hit her.

"What? Is the thought of me frakking a woman senseless on the floor that funny?"

"It certainly isn't commonplace." The chuckle grew into a guffaw.

He leaned in closer. "Just because it isn't something I do every day doesn't mean I don't _want_ to."

Ouch! She burned from the passion searing her as his eyes locked with hers and refused to let go. _ It really should be a crime to have eyes like those!_

Deep and dark as the vacuum of space, they drew her in till she forgot ... everything.

"Prove it," she panted, not caring that he could see the flush beginning on her cheeks and the way her eyes glazed over as the pupils rapidly dilated.

"You have someone in mind?" he asked, just as breathlessly, eyes pulling her closer.

Their breaths mingled, noses touched briefly as the tingles of anticipation jumped from body to body.

"You choose."

His eyes finally released hers and traveled down, stopping longing at her full, pouty lips; down to her full chest, straining to push the zipper down just that much further and expose herself to him. The tab was nestled in just the right place to show off a few inches of creamy, mouthwatering skin.

With an effort he dragged his eyes back up to meet hers.

"On the floor," he said thickly, hands grabbing her upper arms and pulling her off the bunk.

"Me?" she squeaked, surprised yet not really surprised. Lee was a master eye-frakker and since he'd come to Galactica he'd turned his full attention on her, though she'd only half believed he was serious.

He pulled her flush against him. "Did you really think there was anyone else?"

During the next two hours, not only did Lee frak her senseless on the floor, they also christened the bed and the table.

Later they la together, trying to recover physically and mentally from what had happened. Lee stroked her back gently, never taking his eyes off her.

"So what were you_ really_ thinking when I came in?"

fin


	12. 16 Need

**#16 - Need - Expanded**

**oooooooooooooooooooo**

Lee watched her suck back yet another shot of ambrosia. It was her ninth? tenth? in the last hour? He'd lost count. It had become a common routine since she'd returned from New Caprica - she'd drink till she nearly passed out then stagger to her bunk and snore her way through six hours till her next shift started.

He couldn't complain about her performance though - despite being drunk every night, she flew like she always had, perfectly. It was the rest of her life that worried him. Or rather, her non-life. If she wasn't flying, fixing or writing reports, she was drunk. It was obvious for everyone to see that she was self-destructing, but no one dared approach her about it. She was still Starbuck after all, and drunk she was even more likely to knock out your teeth _then_ tell you to get the frak out of her life. He knew all too well - he'd tried when she'd first come back, but obviously the wounds had been too raw. He'd thought that would change over time, but she wasn't giving it a chance to heal, just pretending the pain wasn't there. Typical Kara. But Lee knew, better than anyone, that no matter how hard she tried to bury her pain, it always found it's back up and eventually she was going to have to deal with it. And he would be there, waiting.

"Hey, that's_ my_ glass," she slurred as Lee took it and put it out of her reach.

"Not anymore. You've had enough Kara."

Her eyes met his, full of defiance and anger.

"Who're _you_ to decide I've had enough?" she demanded, barely able to talk.

"A concerned friend."

"Friend, yah, friend ... whatever," she said, waving her hand around wildly. "I don't have friends." She giggled, then immediately became serious. "I don't have anybody, really, not no one ... not nobody."

Lee saw the change in her and recognized the danger. It was time to get her to bed before she became even more melancholy. Usually she was a fun drunk, but every once in a while she turned morose and lashed out at people, especially people who were trying to help her.

The rest of the pilots, sensing the uncomfortable atmosphere, made their excuses and left quickly.

"Come on Kara, let's get you to bed."

She cocked a curious eyebrow at him. "Are you actually propositioning me Lee? How sweet!" She smiled and clutched his arm for support as she stood up. "I accept."

Lee rolled his eyes but put an arm around her waist to steady her as they walked down the corridors.

"You know," she whispered conspiratorially. "I really didn't think you were interested in me anymore."

She leaned so close he could feel her breath against his ear. "But I'm glad you are. I've been waiting for this for years."

Lee cursed himself with every four-letter word he could think of as he felt himself rise. This was not what he had in mind for comforting her and getting her to open up to him. She was perfectly capable of seeming to open up completely during sex and then acting like a total stranger afterwards.

He fervently prayed she would pass out when they reached the bunkroom ... or sooner even. Carrying her dead weight would be preferable to rejecting her advances and adding to her pain.

Unfortunately the gods didn't seem to be listening.

She smiled seductively once the hatch was shut.

Lee took a deep breath and counted to ten ... then began to undress her.

"Well, I never pictured you as the alpha-male type. It's good to be wrong." She smiled playfully.

"Kara, I'm helping you get to bed. Alone. In your _own_ bed."

She pouted. "But I thought ..."

"You thought wrong," he interrupted firmly. "This isn't what you need right now."

"But it _is_." She came over to him and pressed herself against him, throwing her arms around his neck. "It's exactly what I need now. A way to forget."

He extricated himself from her grasp. "You don't need to forget. You need to remember."

"I don't want to remember!" she blazed angrily. "I want to forget everything and move on!" She moved against him again. "You can help me forget. Only you Lee. You're the only one who can help me."

She rubbed herself against his rising manhood. "You want to, I know you do. You can't deny it." She pressed her lips to his, surprisingly gently considering her mood.

He pulled away, after tasting her for a few seconds. "I do want you ... but I want to help you and I know doing this won't help. You need to talk to me. _ Tell_ me what's hurting you and let me be your friend."

"I don't need a friend! I don't need anyone!" she yelled. "Just frak off and leave me alone!"

Lee caught a glimmer of what was going on in her head and realization dawned. He couldn't leave her, or let her go like he usually did. She really did want him to stay, even if her words said otherwise.

He strode across the room and took her in his arms fiercely, encircling her so she couldn't escape.

"Lee! Le go of me!" she screamed, struggling weakly against him.

He shook his head.

"Get the frak off me! LET ME GO!"

They stood together for a moment while she fought him like a wildcat, screaming and hitting wherever her fists could reach, Lee taking the hits but refusing to get angry with her and refusing to let go. He knew she needed this catharsis and though he'd be bruised in the morning, he was glad _he _was the one here with now, not someone who'd back down in the face of her anger, or take advantage of her when she was most vulnerable.

Finally the screaming and beating subsided and she melted into his arms, sobbing. He held her firmly, one had around her waist while the other stroked her hair lovingly till the crying stopped altogether.

He led her to her bunk and gently laid her down, pulling the blanket up to cover her near-nakedness. He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead, letting his lips linger for just a fraction of a second longer than necessary, letting her know he _did_ care.

As he pulled away, her arm snaked out of the covers and grabbed one of his.

"Don't go. I need you Lee," she whispered.

He was about to resist, guessing what she had in mind, but one look into those shattered green eyes and he knew she was finally opening up to him.

He stripped off his uniform and crawled in beside her. She curled up against him like a frightened child as he put his arms around her.

She began to cry quietly. "I need you Lee - don't leave me. Don't ever leave me."

"Never."

That was the day things changed between them. She'd opened up to him and there was no turning back.

They were married a year later.

fin


	13. 13 Change

#13 - Change - Expanded

ooooooooooooooooooooo

Lee watched silently, a small smile on his face, as Kara nursed their daughter, marveling at how much different she was from the time they'd first met six years earlier.

She'd been Zack's girlfriend then, full of fun and fire, loving her relationship with him but not wanting to be tied down. Eventually she relented though and said yes, but there was no way their marriage was going to change her. She was flirty, fun and free-spirited, and she liked her life just the way it was. Happy though Zack had been, he'd confessed to Lee that he wasn't sure it would last. _ He_ wanted domesticity - home and children, with flying taking second place. Children had no place in Kara's world. She wouldn't even talk of it, let alone allow it to happen.

Then Lee had watched her change after Zack's death, pulling deeper into herself. The flirty, fun girl was still there in the persona of Starbuck, but Kara was a changed woman. One he didn't know well, but wished he did.

She would never let him in though, and eventually the two went their separate ways, even their fragile friendship unable to weather the storms the future brought.

When she'd turned to Anders and married him, Lee had mourned the loss of his friend and would-be lover. So many things had needed to be said and done to mend things, but then it was too late. She'd chosen a life with him, a life that included New Caprica and possibly children, but didn't include Galactica, flying or Lee. He'd thought there was no chance for them.

As he opened his eyes, woken as every morning by Kara's gentle murmurings as she fed their daughter, his heart swelled with love. Most days he thought it would burst it was so full.

The small pink mouth opened in a demanding cry and Kara stroked her nipple once ... twice, till white drops appeared. She cradled the tense, sleeper-clad body in one arm while she guided the small mouth to the source of it's comfort. Instantly the bundle relaxed and began to suckle, one small hand resting on the upper part of Kara's breast, kneading it like a contented kitten.

Lee hadn't figured out if Kara intentionally hummed along with the feedings but he was smart enough not to ask directly. He watched, eyes barely open so as not to disturb, the new morning routine as Kara smiled a smile of pure joy.

Change was good.

_ fin _


	14. 39 Torn

**#39 Torn - Expanded**

A/N: I started writing a songfic to Michael W. Smith's 'Do You Dream of Me?' and somehow it lent itself to the expansion of Torn, which I was also thinking about at the time, so I decided to combine them. This will feature a first-person rotating points of view but I won't tell you who they are. You should be able to figure them out for yourself. :)

Words and music by Michael W. Smith

**oooooooooooooooooooooo **

Dreams, within the still of night

On wings of hope take flight inside of me

There upon some distant shore

We want for nothing more than what will be

And you and I, here we are

I wonder as we've come this far...

_Her face looks so peaceful when she sleeps. I can almost believe she doesn't hate me. it doesn't even take much for me to believe that when she smiles in her sleep she's thinking about me. I only wish ... Things went so terribly wrong between us and looking back I'm not even sure how. She hurt me, I hurt her ... I don't even know which us did the hurting first. All I know is we've gone from being close enough to share a mind and soul to being two people who can't even look at each other without hatred clouding our eyes._

_Still ... I can't forget her. I've tried, the gods know I've tried to forget her and move on, knowing we can never be what I've always wanted us to be. I've used Dee - I've been lying to myself and to her, making her believe I love her and want her and her only. I can't believe she doesn't see through it. Every day I look in the mirror, I just want to throw something at my own reflection. She sees me, Lee Adama, Apollo, Commander of Pegasus. I see a man who's wasting his life doing what he doesn't want to do with the woman he doesn't want to be with. It's all a lie, every single second of it._

_I want so badly to make things go back to the way they were, but the only way I can have her is in dreams ..._

If I could only read your mind

Tell me the answer I would find

Do you dream of me?

And when you're smiling in your sleep

Beyond the promises we keep

Do you dream of me?

_Do you dream of me Lee? Once upon a time I was sure you did. The stars in your eyes when you looked at me made my heart race, and I was positive I heard you murmuring my name as you slept. You used to be in love with me - I'm sure of it. Now you hate me and I have no one else to blame but myself. I've used you, toyed with you and thrown you aside in favour of another - someone whom I could love without the danger you've always been for me. It's not a wonder you went elsewhere._

_But I just couldn't help myself, still can't. Every time I think of you with her my blood boils in my veins and I feel like I'm going to explode. I can't stop my mouth from saying hurtful things - they're just reflecting the pain I feel in my heart at losing you._

_Do you still care about me? Is there anything left of what you once felt for me? Or am I just dreaming?_

Love has found a magic space

A deep and hidden place where time stands still

Now I hold you in my arms

You know you hold my heart and always will

_I thought this was it - this was love, pure and simple. You were stronger than Billy. You were forceful, you took charge - you were everything I wanted in a man. But it's all been a lie hasn't it? You never loved me, I can see it in your eyes. You pretend you do, and you want me to believe it but I can see right through you. You're still in love with her._

_You lay there, arms around me, but you murmur her name as you sleep. How can I not know? How can anyone not see that she's not just in your heart, she_ is _your heart? _

_She's not worthy of you. All she ever does is hurt you, and yet you always go back for more. I thought there was something wrong with me, that for some reason I wasn't good enough for you but now I know the truth. There's something wrong with _you_. And her name is Kara Thrace._

And you and I, here we are

And it's a wonder that we've come this far.

_Why? Why did you do this to me? I loved you so much - still love you despite everything we've been through. I want to hate you - I want never to see you again but with every breath I take I think of you. I will till the day I die. Sometimes I feel like I could be happy if I could forget about you, but I can't. Be happy or forget about you. You're a part of me - you're the lighter side to my dark, you're the fire that runs through my cold veins. You're what kept me alive after everything I'd ever lived for came crashing down._

_You've saved my life, and you've nearly taken it away. But none of it matters. If I can't have you I'm not really living._

And after all that we've been through

You've leaned on me, I've leaned on you

Do you dream of me?

And when you're smiling in your sleep

Beyond the promises we keep

Do you dream of me?

_Lee, Lee ... if only I could forget you. I tried - really I did. I hoped that when I left you behind to be with Sam I'd forget you and the pain we always cause each other. Our relationship was good at times - the highs were incredibly high but the lows were so low I felt like I couldn't dig myself out sometimes. So I gave up ... I went for the easy choice, hoping if I left we could both make a life without each other and be happy. _

_I still dream about you though ... every night. Does Sam know? Do I talk in my sleep? I'm sure if I do I must say your name. In my dreams we're happy ... the way we could never really be. We promise each other forever, and dreams do come true. If only it weren't a dream ..._

If I could only read your mind

Tell me the answer I would find

Do you dream of me?

And when you're smiling in your sleep

Beyond the promises we keep

Do you dream of me?

And after all that we've been through

You've leaned on me, I've leaned on you.

Do you dream of me?

Lee sat in his office, reading through the sheaf of documents that plagued those in command daily. His mind was only half-concentrating on what he was doing - somewhat occupied as always with what might-have-been.

The paper with her name on it tore at his heart for a moment, before anger flared again. That's how he always felt when he thought of her - like his heart was being forcefully ripped out of his chest. He scanned it - she was coming back to the fleet, asking to be stationed on Pegasus. Great, just great. How the hell was he supposed to live with this feeling twenty four hours a day, every single day? He could barely stand waking in the mornings, remembering the dreams he'd had of her and how happy they'd been.

He was about to rip it into shreds and toss it in the garbage when another name caught his eye on the paper stapled in behind - Samuel T. Anders. He wanted to just crumple it the way she'd crumpled his heart by leaving to go to New Caprica with him, but something made him flip the first page over and read it.

'Marriage dissolution of Kara Thrace and Samuel T. Anders'.

He blinked. And blinked again. She was free, and she was coming here. His mind told him not to hope but his heart was hopeless. It began to race uncontrollably. A discreet cough lifted his eyes to the doorway.

"Reporting for duty sir?" she said quietly, more of a question than a statement. Her eyes told him everything he needed to know. Everything he'd always wanted to know. The only thing that mattered.

"Good to see you back Captain Thrace. I think we can find a place for you here."

_fin_


	15. 50 Believe

**#50 - Believe - Expanded**

**Words and music by: Jon Lind, Phil Galdston, Wendy Waldman**

**ooooooooooooooo**

_Sometimes the snow comes down in June_

_Sometimes the sun goes round the moon_

_I see the passion in your eyes_

_Sometimes it's all a big surprise_

xxxxx

"I thought you were dead."

"I thought you were in hack."

"It's good to be wrong."

How ironic those words had turned out to be. Everything about their relationship had been wrong, from the first moment they'd seen each other after the annihilation of life as they knew it, till long after she'd returned to Galactica after shunning everyone and everything that had been important to her to make a life on New Caprica with Samuel.

Sometimes things just didn't work out the way you planned. Of course that was an understatement when it came to her - nothing ever worked out the way it was supposed to. She was supposed to become a pro pyramid player. She was supposed to marry Zak. She was supposed to make it right with Lee and perhaps even build a life with him. She was supposed to live with Samuel for the rest of her life as promised in their vows.

Nothing ever seemed to go right for her.

xxxxx

_Cause there was a time when all I did was wish_

_You'd tell me this was love_

_It's not the way I hoped or how I planned_

_But somehow it's enough_

xxxxx

"Did you say you love me?"

"I ... well I ... didn't mean it like ..."

"Lee Adama loves me."

"You're dreaming it Kara."

She could never have told him how crushed she was by that admission. Yes, her heart was confused at that moment - she'd been angry beyond belief at Lee when she'd jumped to Caprica, not to mention knifed to the core by his words, but she was filled with hope and possibility in the form of Samuel. She didn't think she loved him - it was too soon for that, but there was definitely _something_ there.

Nonetheless, she'd been waiting months for Lee to finally pry open his stubborn mouth and say the words she could see written in his eyes in every burning gaze he favoured her with. He loved her - she knew it, everyone else knew it. He probably knew it too, but just couldn't admit it. It had slipped out unawares and he was doing his best to back-pedal.

Obviously he was afraid to admit how he really felt about her.

xxxxx

_But now we're standing face-to-face_

_Isn't this world a crazy place_

_Just when I thought our chance had passed_

_You go and save the best for last_

xxxxx

"Life on New Caprica not fulfilling enough for you?"

His words still had the ability to slice her right to the heart. She said nothing but the look on his face changed to one of regret as he realized how deeply he'd cut her. As always though, neither of them spoke, though their eyes, as always, were never silent.

"It's good to have you back," he said softly.

Her heart trembled - how many times had he hurt her in the past? About as many times as she'd hurt him. Was he serious? Did he miss her? As much as she'd missed him? His face was unreadable - while she was gone he'd perfected the ability to hide his feelings, but his eyes had never been able to lie to her. He was glad to have her back.

It was time for a new beginning.

xxxxx

_All of the nights you came to me_

_When some silly girl had set you free_

_I wondered how you'd make it through_

_I wondered what was wrong with you_

xxxxx

"I can't believe you're here with me."

Kara stretched her neck up to look at him. "Why?"

"I thought you were happy with him."

She lifted a hand to his face and stroked it gently, feeling the sweat wetting the stubble in a deliciously arousing way.

"I was. But I love you."

Lee pulled her down on top of him, again, and made an inarticulate noise in his chest as he began to kiss her. He'd never been good at verbalizing his feelings - especially with her, so he strove to show her what she needed to know. Evidently she was getting the message as she kissed back, allowing all the raw passion and love that she'd held back from him to flow freely.

Their hands clasped together and Kara broke away, looking at the finger where his ring had been. There was still a deep groove there, and every time she felt it the jealousy came bubbling to the surface.

Lee read her mind. "She wasn't the one I wanted to be with either," he said softly. "But since _we_ couldn't be together, I figured I'd try to be happy with someone else."

"Silly man," Kara whispered, kissing him again. "All you had to do was ask me."

xxxxx

_Cause how could you give your love to someone else_

_And share your dreams with me_

_Sometimes the very thing you're looking for_

_Is the one thing you can't see_

xxxxx

Sometimes when she looked at him she wondered how they could have been so stupid. It was the end of the word - they didn't have anyone else, and yet all they did was do their best to hurt each other and push each other away, despite the love they felt inside. It made her heart swell with happiness to think they'd finally overcome all of their stupidity and given in to what was meant to be.

There were still good times and bad, times when they fought and times when they got along - that couldn't be helped, working as closely together as they had to, but at least now when he yelled at her it was only with his voice ... his eyes always spoke love. And when they apologized after a fight, neither one walked away in silence. Instead they took it to bed, and whatever couldn't be spoken in words was always resolved physically.

Finally they'd reached the same space - a place where they could be together, yet be different, sharing a life, sharing a dream.

xxxxx

_Sometimes the snow comes down in June_

_Sometimes the sun goes round the moon_

_Just when I thought our chance had passed_

_You go and save the best for last_

xxxxx

His hand clasped hers firmly as they smiled through tears. Their son was going on his first flight in a viper - more poignant to them than any other achievement could possibly be.

"If someone had asked you twenty years ago if we'd be here, now, living the life we live, would you have believed it?" he whispered in her ear, the feel of his breath, as always, making her tingle inside.

"Believed? No. Wished? Yes. This was what I always wished for - I just didn't know it at the time," she whispered back, sliding her other hand around his neck to pull his lips to hers. They'd long ago given up caring who saw their personal displays of affection - even their son who was embarrassed at seeing his parents kiss had gotten used to the fact that they were always touching, always kissing.

"Back then all I wished was that you would tell me you loved me," he whispered, after breaking the kiss.

"I did. It just took a while ..." She smiled and he pulled her close. It _had_ taken a while - but it had all been well worth the wait.

xxxxx

_You went and saved the best for last_


End file.
