Cruel to be Kind

Title: Cruel To Be Kind

Rating: K

Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men or the song "The Hardest Thing" by 98 Degrees.

Summary: Just read it and review. Please.

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(Logan's POV)

Her face seemed to glow in the moonlight. Maybe it was just him, or maybe she really was that happy to see him. He wasn't even sure why he was here. It was two a.m. and he was outside the house she share with Bobby Drake. He was supposed to be home with his own wife, Jean. But he wasn't.

_We both know that I shouldn't be here  
This is wrong  
And baby it's killing me, it's killing you  
Both of us trying to be strong _

He hadn't been home for two hours now. Why? Because he had to see her one more time. He had to make it officially over. She didn't even know about Jean. They hadn't talked for 3 years until a month ago. He'd run into her at a gas station. They'd gone out and caught up on old times, falling almost immediately into their old familiarity. But he hadn't told her about Jean. It was going to hurt her. Maybe not so much, now that she had Bobby, but it would still kill yet another part of her.

_I've got somewhere else to be  
Promises to keep  
Someone else who loves me  
And trusts me fast asleep_

Logan sighed and ran his hand through his hair. She had asked him in immediately, but he had refused. He wouldn't leave if he entered. Her smile slowly slipped away and her glow seemed to dim. Silently she stepped outside and closed the door. No use letting bugs in after all.

_I've made up my mind  
There is no turning back  
She's been good to me  
And she deserves better than that _

Logan bit his tongue as he watched her take a seat on one of the steps on her porch. Her green nightgown not doing much in favor of hiding her well toned body. He had to do this, he had to let her go.

_It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do  
To look you in the eye  
And tell you I don't love you  
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie  
To show no emotion when you start to cry _

Yes he loved Jean, but he loved Marie too. The innocent girl who wedged herself into his heart then firmly rooted herself into it's very core. But he had chosen Jean. When he'd heard she was engaged to Bobby he was angry, but then he saw what a wise choice it was. She was adored and loved by the younger man. He wasted no expense on her, more than anything Logan could possibly offer her. He'd love her, protect her, and provide for her. What did he have? A bike, a few dollars, and way more mileage age wise than Bobby for sure. Besides he was dangerous. He had several enemies who'd love to hurt someone special to him. Jean could handle herself, she didn't really need him. Marie simply couldn't.

_I can't let you see what you mean to me  
When my hands are tied and my heart's not free  
We're not meant to be _

No, now was the time to tell her. When Jean would never have to know and neither would Bobby, just him and Marie.

_It's the hardest thing I'll ever had to do  
To turn around and walk away  
Pretending I don't love you _

Logan swallowed and sat down next to Marie. He couldn't look at her. Her eyes were big and doe like trusting him to keep her safe. She didn't know he was about to break the only thing that mattered, her heart.

_I know that we'll meet again  
Fate has a place and time  
So you can get on with your life  
I've got to be cruel to be kind _

But he had to do this, so they could both move on and live life to the fullest. The time was now.

_Like Dr. Zhivago  
All my love I'll be sending  
And you will never know cuz  
There can be no happy ending _

He could almost laugh at the irony that was clogging up his throat. By loving her enough to say goodbye he was forcing her to kill her own love for him. Forbidden love, a timeless tale.  
_  
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do  
To look you in the eye  
And tell you I don't love you  
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie  
To show no emotion when you start to cry _

His gruff voice choked out the words he knew had had to say. In less than five minutes she understood. The late night visit, the nervousness, the man that was once Logan. If it was possible her face grew more somber and it was as if her breathing stopped.

_Maybe another time, another day  
As much as I want to, I can't stay _

Logan stood up and stepped off the porch towards his bike. He paused and turn to look at her once more before he fled from her life forever. She seemed so small sitting on the porch step. Her long hair hanging like a curtain about her head as her arms wrapped around her to warm her from the shock. Logan swallowed once more than turned back towards his bike.

_I've made up my mind  
There is no turning back  
She's been good to me  
And she deserves better than that _

His jaw set firmly in place as he climb into the seat and prepared to take off a muffled sob slipped into his over sensitive hearing but he couldn't turn back now. If he did he wouldn't leave.

_It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to do  
To look you in the eye  
And tell you I don't love you  
It's the hardest thing I'll ever have to lie  
To show no emotion when you start to cry _

Staring his bike up he left, back to his Jean.

_I don't want to live a lie  
What can I do _

And he knew when she was done shedding her last tears on him she would go inside too, back to the waiting arms of Bobby Drake.

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I actually normally dislike Jean/Logan pairings, but I wanted to use this song, so go figure.

Love it/Hate it/Have something interesting to say? Speak up ina review or forever hold your peace.

Aslan


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