Rose of Versailles 1. The Trial of Jeanne Valois

This is the result of reading the _Rose of Versailles_ (or _Lady Oscar_, depending where you live) manga and checking on Wikipedia the life of Oscar's father (an historical character). By the way, Jean-Antoine Pierre Marie Victor de Reynier actually existed.

by lord Martiya

_**The Trial of Jeanne Valois**_

That day I, Jeanne de la Motte _nee_ de Valois de Saint-Remy, was in trouble. Or to say it the right way, _exceptionnellement__en merde_. My theft of that diamond necklace had been discovered before she could cut all the loose ends and run, leading to her arrest and trial, and Nicole d'Olivia, the one loose end she had failed to cut, had just ruined her attempt at making a scapegoat out of Rohan with her very presence.

To try and escape my fate, or at least become a martyr, I had accused the Queen of being the real culprit and presented her as a lesbian, with herself, the Duchess of Polignac and that Oscar François de Jarjayes as her lovers. And would avenge my mother, murdered by the Duchess of Polignac. Still, I was a bit displeased for Oscar: she had taken care of my beloved sister Rosalie, saving her from God knows what horrible fate (a knife in the gut or the wheel if she was lucky), but as a crossdresser she was just too obvious of a target. And her protest would serve to cement my claims in the eyes of the people. I counted in my mind, and Oscar did not disappoint me.

"Don't blame Her Majesty for my father's obsession!"

And my plan fell apart due to sheer surprise.

"Wait, what?" I cried.

"My father is obsessed about having a male heir!" the furious Oscar replied. "He had already forced my oldest sister Jean-Antoine to dress and act as a man, and when she died before my birth I took her place! Everyone knows it at Versailles!"

I looked at the many Versailles-allowed nobles present, and all of them nodded (with some snickering). Even Rohan, the one _prince étranger_ who didn't know that Royals sign with only their given names, was nodding.

"You have to be shitting me... My masterpiece in the art of lying and the way to frame that Austrian cow for this ruined by a male heir-obsessed count..." I thought. Then I noticed how everyone (even the people) was looking her, and realized what had happened: "I said it out loud, didn't I?"

"Yes." the president of the Parliament replied. I facepalmed. "Colonel Oscar, the public is forbidden to intervene, please keep it in mind. Now, madame de la Motte, shall you finally tell us the truth?"

"It's a LONG story..."

"Take your time."

"Also, I'm not sure about parts of it, I've reconstructed them with information I found after sneaking my husband into Versailles thanks to the Cardinal's love for acting without thinking."

I said _everything_. I started from my father, count Jacques de Valois de Saint-Remy, having me from his servant Nicole Lamoriere, who was forced to move to Paris with the count's other illegitimate daughter Rosalie after he wasted his entire fortune. I then said how I was taken in by madame de Boulainvilliers and falsified her last wills after her death (omitting how my role in said death), and how I got my husband and willing accomplice Nicolas de la Motte into the Gards du Corps and found out from him about Jacques and Marie-Anne, the two _legitimate_ and equally desperate children of the count that she had never managed to meet (Jacques being a soldier serving in Africa and Marie-Anne a nun in a convent she had never managed to find).

I countinued with Rosalie, who had been taken in by the count of Jarjayes thanks to his wife and younger daughter's intercession (Rosalie had been reticent on saying how she met them), telling me how our mother had died after being ran over by the carriage of the duchess (then countess) of Polignac, and that her actual mother was a noblewoman named Martin Gabrielle. I continued with my investigations, finding out that the full name of the _only_ Martin Gabrielle at Saint-Remy at the right time to have Rosalie from the debauched count was Yolande Martin Gabrielle de Polastron, and my _refusal_ to check if the Duchess of Polignac had a cousin with her same name.

I then started the juicy part: my heists in general and how I cheated a crapload of money from Rohan using the fake letters from the queen and Nicole d'Olivia. I told everything, including how the swine tried to seduce me (and his failure: not only I had made a point to not cheat on Nicolas, but I had heard that Rohan wasn't exactly skilled in the bed), and how I successfully stole the diamond necklace, only failing to run in time.

"Then I lied my ass off in the attempt to get away with a slap on the wrist or at least become a martyr for liberty, and you know the rest." I concluded.

"I see." the president stated coolly. "Madame de la Motte, I still have a few questions. Have you ever met Her Majesty the Queen?"

"Saw her from distance once."

"Does Alessandro of Cagliostro have any role in this heist?"

"You think I'm stupid enough to let that swine near me?!"

After that, the Parliament delibered on the case. Louis René Édouard de Rohan, prince of Rohan-Guéméné and Archbishop of Strasbourg, was aquitted with the justification that idiocy is not a crime, and kicked in an abbey by the King (he may be too nice for his own good, but you can't touch his wife and hope to get away with that). Cagliostro was aquitted for not being involved in the facts in any illegal way, and told by a medic that French air could damage his lungs (heard he's in London too, now). Rétaux de Villette, my accomplice and material author of the forged letters, was exiled to Italy. Nicolas was sentenced to life in prison as soon as he was arrested (not that I told them where I sent him). And I was sentenced to life in the Salpêtrière, the prison for whores. I stayed there one full day before Oscar herself came and brought me to a convent in Auxonne, the Queen's pay for opening her eyes about her own naivety. Now I'm serving my sentence there. Who knows what will happen...

_Author note_

When I discovered that the historical Count of Jarjayes actually pulled an Oscar with his firstborn daughter I just _had_ to write a story where Oscar replied to Jeanne's slander in a different way. It was to be a one-shot in my _Deleted Scenes_ series, but now I have plans for a story detailing how history changed. Stay tuned.


	2. The Thoughts of Marie Antoinette

Second chapter, with Marie Antoinette's reaction to what she learned. And before you ask: I'm basing this on actual history (I'm an history junkie) and the manga version of _Rose of Versailles_ (read it fully, including the gaiden episodes and the sequel _Eikou no Napoleon-Eroica_). If you only watched the anime, you'll find a few differences (for example, there will be no Saint-Just for a while because he's still in high school writing a satirical poem that Oscar read for the porn scenes).

by lord Martiya

_**The Thoughts of Marie Antoinette**_

I, Marie Antoinette, cannot believe it. During her trial, Jeanne Valois accused my dear friend the Duchess of Polignac of having Rosalie Lamoriere as illegitimate daughter and murdering the woman she entrusted Rosalie with. Worse, both her and Oscar _confirmed_. Not completely, as apparently it was an accident, but the Duchess ran Nicole Lamoriere over with a carriage and then ran, without even trying to save her victim or even see her face!

I understand that, differently than at Mother's court, having a lover and not keeping the relationship platonic is normal for French nobles, and could not fault her for panicking when she had a daughter at such a young age with so little money in both families, but that murder... That murder... No, I can't understand and I must fault her.

I shall cast her from her position of Governess to the Children of France, and cease favouring her family. But who can I trust to replace her? Marie Louise, the Princess of Lamballe, is already the Superintendent to the Queen's Household, the Princess of Guéméné had to resign last year due a scandal and her brother-in-law's foolishness will only make her more reluctant, Oscar could never accept...

Oscar... She who would never accuse anyone without evidence, and did not reveal Rosalie's true parentage because of that... I must ask her advice. Not on who will be the new Governess, but on many things.

* * *

"I need your honest advice, Oscar." I tell her as she arrives. "Tell me, what does the people _really_ think of me?"

Oscar sighs. It's not a good sign.

"The people is starving, and is blaming you for everything. They see that the economic crisis has only worsened during your husband's reign, and rightly blame the money wasted in Versailles for it."

Translated: they hate me, and have some reason. But she isn't finished.

"They forgot how much madame du Barry wasted before she was exiled from Versailles, and are starting to believe wild rumours involving you with a phrase about having people without bread buying brioche, and some even say your son the Duke of Normandy is your child with Fersen-"

I really have to thank my ability to escape from my tutors at Vienna, or I wouldn't have known the words to express my outrage.

"How can I reconquer their love? How my husband and I can help them?"

"Returning to the main palace would be a start. I understand you need to escape pressure, but you can't stay here constantly. Also, we'll need to stop the crisis and stop the abuses of some nobles toward the people."

"Can you suggest me some names?"

"My Queen?"

"You always valued honesty and ability over everything. I can trust you to find the right people, if you don't already know them."

She already has two names. The first was Charles Alexandre, vicomte de Calonne: he has recently redeemed himself from his previous spendthrift policies and knows economics better than most nobles, and could make a magnificent Controller-General of Finances. I know my husband was already considering him, with Oscar's backing he'll have the job. The second is Maximilien François Marie Isidore de Robespierre (seriously, what's with Frenchmen and these long names?!): a young lawyer from Arras, he's an advocate of the poors, incorruptible, honest to a faul and more knowledgeble than Oscar about the laws and the problems of the people, he'll make a fine advisor.

Now I must thank Jeanne. She may be a criminal, but she opened my eyes, and possibly saved France. And I must return to my search. Who can I trust with my children?

_Author note_

Marie Antoinette is both easy and difficult to write. On one side, she's a woman in love trapped in a nearly loveless marriage by duty, on the other she's a woman with the natural talent but not the knowledge to be a great queen. Each side is easy to write, but both together... For now I got away by keeping Fersen away (he's a regimental commander, he can't be with Marie Antoinette all the time), I hope I'll be able to write her well when I can't avoid having Fersen around.

About that infamous phrase about bread and brioche... The anedocte first appeared in a book written in 1765 (even if published in 1782), when Marie Antoinette was still in Austria and NINE.


	3. Robespierre's Job

Third chapter. It's Robespierre's turn. And I've decided to pull in a certain other anime character, with differences dictated by real-life history. When she'll appear you'll see which ones.

by lord Martiya

_**Robespierre's Job**_

I am Maximilien too-many-names de Robespierre, and I'm warning you all: _never_ piss off Oscar François de Jarjayes, she can hold grudges like nobody else.

Why I say this? One reason: I am entrusted with Calonne's public image, and I'm sure she knew how bad he is with that when she suggested my name to the Queen, even if she says she doesn't.

Make no mistakes, I'm glad of being an advisor to the Royals and serving the people better than just as a provincial lawyer, but Calonne couldn't piss off people more if he did it on purpose! Seriously, without me, or the help of Bernard and the other journalists, not only he would have failed in imposing the measures to try and stop the crisis, but he would have probably ended being held accountable for everything!

Speaking of Bernard, I owe him one. Without him marrying de Jarjayes' protege (no idea on how it happened), she would still studying ways to make me serve France while making my life hell for causing that bar brawl in which her secret boyfriend had his wallet stolen. Then again, I didn't out him as the Black Knight, only convinced him to quit before Oscar brought him in (he says it cost him a thousand livres, but I didn't make him pay when I won him his last name back in that civil suit).

Without counting Calonne, life is good: I'm helping the people on larger scale, I can still practice at the bar, I have an officer of the French Guards who owes me for saving his career when he punched out a superior for harassing his sister (he also owes Oscar: she happened to be there to coordinate a failed attempt to arrest that female version of Bernard, and was the one who involved me with the trial) and defends me from attempted murders, got the Queen to let Calonne and Necker do their job, and the crisis is finally stopping getting worse.

Now it's the year 1788, and future looks good.

* * *

I said future looks good. I was wrong: the King just informed me that the Parliaments (all sixteen of them) have refused to approve the suppression of internal customs (as opposed to the current suspension that is about to end. They also refused to renew it) and the universal land tax. The latter would allow to fully cut down the taxes in a few years, but they refused because most of the land is property of the Church or the Nobility, and that would partly empty their pockets.

"The Estates-General have greater authority than them in tax matters." is the suggestion of madame de Polignac (no idea how she managed to remain as Governess of the Children of France, but she became a better person after Jeanne Valois sarcastic tongue made her understand what an _horrible_ woman she had become). An intelligent suggestion... If not for a couple particulars she obviously didn't know.

"The Estates deliberate separately." the Marquis of Dreux-Brézé points out. "And even if they didn't, the delegates are roughly in parity, and the Nobles and the Church would use their superior numbers to-"

Dreux-Brézé was forced to put a hand on his mouth to prevent himself from laughing his ass off. I have no such compulsions and have realized the same thing: we only have to double the number of the Third Estate, and with the current political climate they'll do the job for us and draw at least some of the delegates of the two other Estates. Then the King will just have to ratify it. I'm _so_ returning to Arras: I can do a lot more in the Estates-General. And Necker is more than enough to keep Calonne out of trouble.

_Author note_

And so the story goes on to the Estates-General. Because, seriously, the Revolution happened exactly _because the Parliaments had constantly blocked attempts at reforms that would tax the nobles __**and**__ attempts at levying other taxes to try and recover some money in an attempt to weaken the King's power while passing themselves as the victims_. That and Marie Antoinette had little idea on how to rule a country, with her husband being too shy to oppose her.

And if you wonder why Robespierre is convinced Oscar held a grudge against him... Well, he has a reason: one night Oscar was trying to drown her sorrows for Fersen in a pub when Robespierre showed up and, to provide Bernard with material for an article, revealed her status as a captain in the Garde du Corps (the Household Regiment Oscar served in) _fully knowing it would cause a brawl_, brawl that ended with the pub destroyed, half of the patrons knocked out by Oscar and Andre and Oscar and Andre defeated, with Andre's wallet stolen to boot. Oscar never held a grudge against him, but she could have.


	4. The National Assembly

In this fourth chapter we get to the National Assembly. Because with the plans already formed and the King approving the transformation from Estates-General to National Assembly was much faster. And we have one of the early leaders of the Revolution, before a pericarditis killed the one force that could have created a constitutional monarchy without much bloodshed.

by lord Martiya

_**The National Assembly**_

I am Honoré Gabriel Riqueti, comte de Mirabeau and delegate of the Third Estate for the sénéchaussée of Aix. Many call me a pervert and a gambling addict. They're partly right: my sexual mores are a bit less constrained than those of other Frenchmen, and I was nearly ruined by my gambling addiction. They also underestimate me for this, not noticing that I am not stupid, nor that, differently from the marquis De Sade, I can hold my instincts in check. Otherwise, how could I have been elected as representative of a city under the rule of my political enemy the Count of Provence?

I can notice things. How the _Ancien Régime_ and feudal privileges are doomed. How the little girl I wished to bed years ago is now the protege of the colonel of the Garde du Corps and the loyal wife of a journalist. And how Robespierre has acquired influence over the Queen, and how that young Robespierre and others had planned this National Assembly.

With his help, and with Lafayette's, I can sell the idea of a constitutional monarchy to the Royals as soon as we have approved these reforms. Debate has ended for today. Tomorrow we'll vote, and in the meantime I'll try and talk to Robespierre.

* * *

Yesterday, the Royals accepted the idea of a constitutional monarchy. It was an hard sell to the Queen, but when the Duke of Orleans mentioned the precedent of Charles I of England waiting for either her husband or one of his successors (a cheap shot, saying that to a mother who lost a daughter to tuberculosis and has a son dying of the same illness) she relented.

We have now approved the financial reforms, and the King is ordering the draft of a constitution for the kingdom. The idea that current laws and traditions are based on the times of king Hugh Capet and are now outdated and in need of change comes from Robespierre, but the speech is all of the King, and-What the...?

The gate has been smashed, and a scantily dressed blonde woman with a cape and a mask and armed with a side sword barged in, pursued by a detachment of French Guards. The Marquis of Lafayette blocks her way holding his court sword, only for the woman to hammer it with her weapon and break it, and-What kind of strength does she have in her arms?! She just threw Lafayette on the Guards!

Now she breaks the wooden panels under the King's platform with a single kick, then _jumps on the Guards__'__ heads and runs away._ What did just happen?

"Captain de Soisson, what did just happen?" the King asks.

"That was the Star of the Seine." the Guards captain says. "And-Oh, God... Guards, block the building! 'Till I say otherwise, only the His Majesty can enter or leave!"

Some of the nobles and higher-ranked members of the Church are incensed. Then the captain explains there is explosive under the King's platform. And not just gunpowder, but Berthollet's fulminating silver, the most powerful explosive in existance. And everybody shuts up, for either you had been set up and you now wants justice or revenge or you were an accomplice and you must fake having been set up.

Everybody knew some of the nobles would fight their loss of privileges, but this is discomforting...

_Author note_

Yeah... The nobles won't lose their privileges without a fight. What will they dare to do?

And the Star of the Seine (the only fictional character that will appear apart those from _Rose of Versailles_. Well, her, her friend Danton, Robert, Zaral and de Moralle) showed up, fighting for her people and her family (but she doesn't know the last part) and saving the National Assembly. And if you ask why she has that monstruous strength... Well, her sword is apparently a basket-hilted sidesword, and she uses it like a fencing weapon and can run like she's disarmed! It's CANON she has absurdly strong arms and legs! The only members of the French Guards who could beat her is Alain, and would have to confront his superior technique with that strength. At least his sword is actually made for combat, differently from the one Lafayette brought to the National Assembly...


	5. Zaral's Ungrateful Job

Today it's Zaral's turn, called to investigate about the attempted killing of the National Assembly. Thankfully, Zaral and his men have a recognizable uniform, so I only had to make up his full name.

by lord Martiya

_**Zaral's Ungrateful Job**_

I am Gastone Isidore de Zaral, natural son of the Duke of Richelieu, and I hate my job.

It wasn't always like this. Thanks to my relations and the Marquis de Moral protecting me from the fall-out of my grandfather and my cousin picking the Countess du Barry over Marie Antoinette when Louis XV was still alive, I landed a post of second lieutenant in the French Guards, and my skills as commander saw me promoted to lieutenant proper (captain, if I were in a line regiment) really fast.

Then that detestable Black Knight, Black Tulip (alias Robert de Vaudreuil, current Duke of Forge. If only I could prove it...) and Star of the Seine started stealing from the nobles and interfering with me carrying de Moral's orders, and instead of being a major or even a lieutenant colonel I'm still a lieutenant spending ten livres a month into belts!

Still, I'm the best detective in all of Paris, and I may finally land a promotion by completing my new assignment: finding who tried to blow up the National Assembly and serving him to the King on a silver platter. And I will do _anything_ to succeed.

* * *

My soldiers are detaining a group of commoners, including an annoying journalist resembling the Black Knight and a woman identical to the Star save for having waved hair. Wait, it's Rosalie Lamoriere, de Jarjayes' protege... Damn, I hope she'll appear anyway.

I hear clopping, and when I turn the Star of the Seine is coming with a murderous expression.

"Soldiers, let them go." I order. Then, to Lamoriere and her husband, I say: "Sorry for disturbing you, but I needed to contact the Star of the Seine and this fake series of arrests was the fastest way."

Lamoriere shows she learned a rather foul language before being picked up by de Jarjayes, while the Star slaps her forehead.

"What do you want from me?" she asks.

"I've been assigned to find out who tried to murder the King and the National Assembly, and I'd like to know how you found out."

"I'll give you the data tomorrow."

She cuts my saddle before I can order my Guards to shoot her horse (she's still a wanted criminal) and rides away while I'm too busy not falling from my horse to have her captured. Here's two sous going into replacing it...

* * *

I'm checking the lists of chemists capable of preparing fulminating silver and people who have access to it when my Guards bring me a group of tied-up people, identified as those who brought the explosive into the Assembly's chamber by a letter of the Star of the Seine. I interrogate them, and discover that, while career criminals, they had no idea of what they had set there, only their boss, who had eaten their pass (left unused. Most French and Swiss Guards are too lazy to actuall guard the gates of Versailles) a few hours ago and killed himself when the Star found them. The boss' body is here too.

I cut open the boss' body, and find the remains of the pass. Signature's ruined, it won't be as easy as I hoped. At least he wasn't smart enough to just burn it and throw the ashes in the Seine... I call the writing expert and give him the letter and the key to the room where we keep handwriting examplars of the people who have access to fulminating silver, and return examining the list.

There's no need to search for the chemists, both the criminals and a letter from de Soisson have just confirmed the explosive had been taked from the munition dump of the French Guards' barracks in Paris. These very barracks. I don't like this...

* * *

The handwriting expert comes with his identification. As I expected, the traitor in the Guards did not use his secretary but wrote the thing himself to prevent security risks. What I did _not_ expect is the identity of our culprit. I hope I'm wrong, but I have to check anyway. I call de Jarjayes, the one person I can trust to be loyal to the Royals, and tell her the situation. She agrees with me we'll need harder evidence for the charge to stick on the culprit.

She organizes a trap, and the day after I'm talking with our culprit, and begging him to tell it's a mistake or an imitation.

"It is not." he states matter-of-factly. My last hope I was wrong is shattered.

"But... Why?" I ask.

"I had to do it. They would have destroyed our traditions and society."

"They wouldn't have! I don't like it, but if we are to stop the crisis we nobles _have_ to pay taxes too!"

"We've survived for centuries without paying taxes. We just need to increase the taxation of the commoners, after all they live for that."

The door opens, and the Marquis of Moralle finds out that Oscar François de Jarjayes with her most trusted officers, de Soisson, two journalists, the Bishop of Autun, the Marquis of Lafayette, the Count of Mirabeau, the Star of the Seine, the Black Tulip and _Their Majesties the King and the Queen_ were listening his confession. And the Queen is _furious_.

Moralle stands and tries to extract his sword, but I use the speed acquired in years of near-fanatical training and battles against the Star of the Seine to pierce his hand and arrest him. I can barely hear the King saying I'll be rewarded for this. I really hate my ungrateful job.

I leave as the Star of the Seine says something to the Queen, and the Queen replies harshly while the Black Tulip tries to prevent them from coming to blows.

Then I hear Her Majesty and the Star shouting something. The Queen was louder and shouted in German, so I don't know what they shouted. Still, the word 'schwestern' seemed the key one in Her Majesty's cry, I'll have to look it up later.

* * *

I've looked up that word, and the Star of the Seine was just pardoned. I am going to Versailles, both to receive my promotion and to ask de Jarjayes the best drink to knock myself out without getting too hard of an hangover.

_Author note_

Good old Zaral... An arrogant asshole, who is otherwise a competent commander in the French Guards (line infantry, differently from the grenadiers Oscar commanded in the original manga and anime), content of leaving the people alone when he's not getting orders of oppressing them, and loyal to the King until his death. And devoured by his hate. Maybe I'll be able to not kill him off, or to give sense to his death, who knows.

And about Oscar and the ranks... Well, Household officers are effectively by one to three ranks above their regular army counterparts (as the regimental colonel of the Garde du Corps, Oscar is de-facto a brigadier general), and Oscar _is_ an heavy drinker yet she has no hangover issues, she knows well what or how to drink...


	6. Oscar's Fear

Sixth chapter. This was difficult to write: Oscar is a character with very strong opinions, and this is a particularly difficult moment for her...

by lord Martiya

_**Oscar's Fear**_

I am fighting a mock duel, and for the first time in years someone is giving me, Oscar François de Jarjayes, a run for my money.

My opponent is Simone Lorène, also known as the Star of the Seine, and the recently discovered Queen's younger natural sister. I am faster and better trained, but I have to admit her blows are stronger (thanks to both superior strength and heavier sword) and she has more combat experience. In a real duel I'd have to defeat her fast, or I'd grow tired and die.

"What is your opinion of the Queen?" she asks.

I expected that. Having grown up with the people in the Île de la Cité, she had not matured a good opinion of the Queen. In fact she used to mildly hate her as the one responsible for the starving of the people, at least until Jeanne's trial exposed some dirty laundry and De Brienne's initial measures started slowing the crisis. That and Zaral stopped receiving oppressive orders (and was able to spend less into belts, clothes and saddles).

"I think she is a good person, strong but caring, and tends to make decisions before she knows all facts." I reply. Then I can't resist to point out: "Just like you."

After all, she had access to Versailles and the chance to tell her about the people's conditions (something that Marie Antoinette would have believed more than the words of the courtesans due simple logics: who knows how the people lives better than members of the people themselves?) or to encounter her, yet she made the same decision to hate her as those who don't have her same chances.

"We took after our father." she replies.

And how! After the opera singer he had fallen in love with had got pregnant he faked his own kidnapping to be free to stay with her, and only returned to Vienna and told his wife what had happened after the troops sent to rescue him found him and forcefully brought him back. And we'd have already known of her identity had he not decided to reveal it while in the same carriage with our future queen (I'm not sure what happened, but apparently she bashed his head hard enough to crack the skull. I guess Simone takes from the father for the monstruous strength...).

"I wasn't expecting a bombing at the National Assembly..." she said. "What were they thinking?!"

"They were thinking the Assembly would strip them of a right granted to them by God." I replied. "They forgot _why_ they were tax free in the first place: when that right was granted, nobles didn't have any money with which they'd pay taxes nor the State offered as many services as it does now, so they offered their own bodies and swords to protect the kingdom and administered justice in parts of it. Same thing with the Church, only they exchanged the sword with the knowledge preserved from the fall of Rome, so bishops also served as advisors to the King and their territories were more productive. I'm simplifying it, but in the end the origins of the privileges of the First and Second Estates is that they didn't pay taxes in exchange for helping in other ways. And they should already know what happens when those privileges have lost their reason but still exist."

History already has two examples to offer. The first is the struggle of English kings to try and impose an absolute and Peer-backed dominion over their people, that resulted in a series of civil wars, a beheaded king and another deposed and exiled. The other, more recent, is the result of the British Colonies in America demanding for either sending their representatives in the Parliament of the United Kingdom or to have their own assemblies become its counterparts (whatever the Parliament would decide to apply already existing laws) only to be ignored, with the end result being the United States of America.

And now that Their Majesties are using that lesson to avoid unnecessary bloodshed many nobles are trying to oppose what is obviously the Will of God and the course of history... Idiots.

"In moments like this I'm ashamed of being a countess." I say. "Can't they understand it's useless?!"

Simone flinches and drops her sword, her eyes showing concern.

"What happened?" I asks.

"Yesterday I heard almost the same words." she replied. "A young artillery officer I met a few years ago showed up at my flower shop, I remember his words: 'Our estimeed nobles are willfully ignoring what happens when privileges lose their reason and the privileged men don't give them up on their own. They can't understand it's useless. And have ruined my leave: with a civil war brewing I have to return to my regiment, even if the colonel has not recalled me yet. Give them hell for me, Star of the Seine'. Then he bought a red dahlia for luck and returned to his regiment."

"Civil war? I hope that officer is wrong... What's his name?"

"Napoleon Bonaparte, of the Régiment de La Fère."

_I_ flinch too. I ran into him a few days ago, and I know what I saw: a man with unimpressive looks and eyes that reflect great intelligence and ambition and an iron will. A man that will become a Marshal of France, if given even a minuscole chance to show his talents. And who voiced my fears, but takes for granted they'll become reality.

I call the nanny, and return to my brandy. I hope he's wrong. He _has_ to be wrong... God, I beg thee, show me he's wrong!

_Author note_

I had to solve the conundrum of Marie Antoinette having a younger sister from the same father born the same year of his death but not knowing about her name or face. And, seriously, given Marie Antoinette's temper, that's what she would have done. It usually manifests more subtly due her being more mature than when she was ten, but it's there.

When we strip away all the propaganda, we find out that the American Revolutionary War started not because king George III imposed unjust and heavy taxes (by that point it was clear that a British king trying to impose taxes would have to run fast or get beheaded), but by the _Parliament_ levying _low_ taxes in spite of not having Colonial representatives in the House of Commons, something that, by British Law, was illegal. The Colonials wanted a redress of said situation, and had arrested the _smugglers_ responsible for the Boston Tea Party (the tax on tea had just been lowered, making legally-imported tea cheaper than smuggled tea), the Parliament ignored them and held the Colonies responsible for that crime, George III looked the other way, and, after British troops and Colonial militia started shooting at each other, the Continental Congress decided enough was enough, and the rest is history. And French troops were decisive in defeating the British, by the way...


	7. Plus Royaliste Que le Roi

A new chapter, with a magnificent point-of-view character: His Majesty Louis XVIII. For now still the Count of Provence...

by lord Martiya

_**Plus Royaliste Que le Roi**_

"This is madness." I, Louis Stanislas Xavier, Count of Provence and second in the succession line (well, third, but I fear my nephew the Dauphin will succumb to consumption soon) say my brother, Louis XVI.

"_What_ is madness, Stanislas?" he asks me with uncharacteristic decisiveness. "Punishing the man who tried to have us murdered?"

"Of course not. It's a pity we can't bring him to the wheel..." Contrary to what most people would believe, I am sincere. I wish to succeed my brother, but not this way. Not if I can help it. "It's taking away the privileges of the nobility and the Church! It goes against the will of God!"

"Does it? I took up study of history, and have found that Robespierre's theory is right."

"And what if they demand your abdication? Or, heaven forbid, a _republic_?!"

"This is what we are trying to prevent." My brother may be the king, but never uses the Royal We, unless remembered beforehand. This is not just his plan. And he confirms it immediately: "My beloved wife, Louis Philippe, Oscar, Robespierre and I have seen what happened more than a century ago when England found itself in a similar situation: Charles I of England was beheaded, England, Scotland and Ireland were devastated by the Wars of the Three Kingdoms and the madness of Cromwell, and, even if the monarchy was restored, the Parliament and the people won. Now we have a choice: helping the process, diminishing the bloodshed and making sure it won't do too much too early, or opposing it and watch France being ruined by war. Assuming we survive long enough, that's it."

He thought it through. Better than I did.

"I understand... We still have a problem." I tell him. "The succession."

"Louis Charles will be the next Dauphin." my dear brother says. "And don't believe the rumours: I kept an eye on Fersen since New Year's Day of 1774, and he never overstepped his bonds."

And thus I realize that I underestimated my brother. I always knew he's much smarter than he looks, but this...  
Then the _Duke_ of Rochefoucauld-Liancourt, president of the National Assembly, barges in.

"I hope you have a good reason for this breach of protocol!" I threaten him.

"The Count of Artois is leading a rebellion, and has proclaimed himself king!"

Yes, a good reason indeed. And I can't help but notice that our brother the Count of Artois is named _Charles_ Philippe...

_Author note_

The Count of Provence's justification for the feudal system was not invented: for centuries it was thought as the ideal form of rule, imposed by the will of God, with small republican nations being rationalized as places where the feudal overlord conceded the people to elect their own lord (that in at least Venice's case was actually called with a variation of duke). It took the aforementioned Wars of the Three Kingdoms to suggest an alternative idea, and only with the French Revolution said idea started displacing the feudal system.


	8. Le Lieutenant Auxonniere

I was rewatching _The Star of the Seine_ to make sure I'd stay true to the series (even if the background was changed by Jeanne's rant at the trial), and in episode 11 I found confirmation of one of my suppositions: Simone _is_ ridicolously strong, to the point she manhandled a muscolar man thrice her size _completely by accident_. On the other hand, I got the dates wrong: the series does not start in 1784 as I believed, but in either 1780 or 1781 (on november 21, 1783 Simone was a witness to the first manned flight in a balloon, courtesy of the Montgolfier brothers, and she had lived two or three years in a convent before that). Now that I've corrected chapter 6 with the right dates, I'll start the civil war. And bring back Jeanne.

by lord Martiya

_**Le Lieutenant Auxonniere**_

In the six years lived in this convent, I, Jeanne Valois, have truly missed only one thing. It's not the ability to know my husband in the Biblical sense that I miss, it's information on what's happening.

Yes, I can hear some rumours, but the nuns and the servants here have orders to not pass me informations, so my knowledge of the outside world is wanting, for lack of a better term, and only based on what some of the guards from the artillery school tell me.

I've heard of men _flying_ in Paris, of Louis XVI dying and Marie Antoinette marrying Fersen and make him the new king, of the Duke of Orléans being crowned king, of the Marie Antoinette having taken various members of the Garde du Corps as lovers of a young murderous genious among the ranks of the local garrison, and many other things. And I have _no way_ to understand what is true and what is false. Well, apart the ones regarding a change in king (and besides, Fersen?!) or the variant of Marie's lover that names him Oscar François, those are just silly.

My cell's door opens, and two officers enter. One is an insignificant-looking young man wearing the dark blue of the local garrison and the artillery school staff, while the other is a _gorgeous_ soldier with a light blue custom uniform and the markings (and the looks) of the Garde du Corps, Scots Company. I think I've already seen him somewhere... Then the Garde du Corps officer speaks.

"Jeanne de Valois-Saint Rémy, countess de La Motte, by orders of the King our Lord and your own safety I am to bring you to Versailles."

"My own safety?" I don't like the sound of that...

"His Majesty and his closest advisors are reforming the state taking away some of the privileges of the nobles, and the Count of Artois has declared himself king to try and stop the course of history." the local officer says. I have a few problems understanding him through his strange accent. "And as suicidal he is, he understood _you_ ultimately caused the King and the Queen to take these steps, and wants revenge.

"Had many of our officers not joined this foolish revolt, our regiment could easily hold Auxonne, but as it is now we're better to retreat. At least after we've taught evolution to the Regimént de Lamarck..."

I don't understand the joke, but the Garde du Corps officer (whose name I've just remembered, he's the Count of Girodelle) does, and he's not amused.

"That's a powerful line infantry regiment supported by the deserters of the La Fere regiment, how do you think we can take on them?"

The artilleryman brings out a roll of parchment and gives it to Girodelle, explaining it's his plan for this kind of situations. Girodelle reads, and blanches.

"We can't exactly show mercy to those traitors, can we?" the artillery officers says nonchalantly. "Plus, they stole the regimental standards, and I'd like to come to Versailles with them."

I look at him, and flinch back. He's not insignificant anymore. Only his eyes have changed, but he looks like a peckish eagle who has spotted a sleeping rabbit. And the rabbit is an entire infantry regiment.

"Let's do it." Girodelle says, a look of grim determination on his face.

* * *

I am in Auxonne's main square, with the entire Scots Company and the local garrison facing the Regimént de Lamarck, their light blue coats declaring the German birth of its soldiers, and the deserters of the Regimént de La Fere, the same of the local garrison. And the deserters look scared since the little lieutenant showed himself to them smiling. And with good reasons: I've just realized the rumour about a murderous genious is true, and talks about the insignificant-looking, silly-accented Napoleon Bonaparte. I see what he has in mind, and I can't help but pray that the commander of the Lamarck regiment, now talking with Girodelle, will surrender.

Girodelle returns, his sour looks telling us the massacre shall happen. The lieutenant brings a loudhailer to his mouth and announces: "Ten seconds of life remaining. Get in the alleys and _don't move_ if you wish to live."

The Lamarck soldiers are insulted by his apparent arrogance. The La Fere rebels run in the alleys and the homes.

The Lamarcks look puzzled. Then the Scots Company moves, and the rebels can see what Napoleon had planned for them: _cannons_ loaded with the so-called buck and ball, a large-caliber ball followed by the musket-caliber balls of the grapeshot. And they deployed in infantry squares, ideal to take on cavalry but just targets against artillery.

The artillery fires, killing and maiming dozens of men of the Lamarck regiment and breaking their squares. The Scots Company charges. It's a massacre: acting in groups and from their horses, the Household troops hold a decisive advantage against the still more numerous but disorganized and terrified German mercenaries, and the La Fere rebels have changed their minds and are blocking any escape route with musket fire and bayonets.

The blue coats of the Scots Company are becoming red... Such a magnificent red... So beautiful... Why do I feel ill?

* * *

I don't know how long I've been out. I'm told I've emptied my stomach and gone into shock, but I can't remember anything after that Napoleon ordered his men to fire their guns.

The Battle of Auxonne, if we can call it a battle, ended in a few minutes. Most of the Regimént de Lamark has been killed, and the survivors, all from the rank and file, are all wounded and too terrified to do anything but wobble. The rebels of the Regimént de La Fere have thrown themselves to the mercy of Louis XVI, and will be brought to Versailles.

Losses among the loyalists amount to six or seven dead, a dozen wounded, and twenty-two horses from the Scots Company. I wonder... What will happen to the enemies of France when Napoleon Bonaparte will reach the rank of general?

_Author note_

I don't know if it was true for the historical Garde du Corps regiment, but in _Rose of Versailles_ both the troops and the officers are noted to be handpicked for both skills and good looks, with Girodelle admitting that, as a Garde du Corps officer, he had obviously very good looks.

The original nucleous of the Garde du Corps du Roi regiment was a company of mounted archers of Scottish birth, around which three other companies of French mounted archers were assembled. With time the regiment became fully French, but the first company kept the name of Scots Company.

This Napoleon is based on the version appeared in _Eikou no Napoleon – Eroica_ (itself very close to the historical version): insignificant looks as long as he's not glaring at someone (then that someone will risk an heart attack) or busy doing his job, very ambitious, and utterly insensible to the collateral damage and the enemy losses as long as he accomplishes the result (as noted by Alain in the aftermath of the 13th Vendemiaire revolt). I can easily see how this little guy could have got a fame as a murderous genious: a genious he is, and for the murderous... Well, he was a little too soon in advocating the complete destruction of the enemy force as a mean to win a war.


End file.

Rose of Versailles, Adventure