Glee 1. Prologue

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG for now. Nc17 not so much later.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Season One and Two.  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Ella Greggs.  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 5ooo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves. But then one night they meet again, in an unexpected way and in an unexpected place and everything changes.  
><strong>AN:** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
>Also, you'll notice that this is unbetaed, so I apologize in advance. English is not my first language. Any offers? I have to warn that the later chapters are quite long, since I can't never manage to write short chapters.<p>

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><p><strong>Prologue.<strong>

The weather is nice outside and for that, Kurt is glad. It's the middle of August, and it's relaxing because he has a bit more than a month to enjoy the good weather before start worrying about the temperature dropping.

New York used to be his dream city. Of course it was. The city was full of dreams to make come true, thousands of opportunities waiting for him, big things to achieve and to become. Everything was supposed to be perfect; a huge fairy tale that involved Broadway shows, fashion shows, success and a long line of cute boys ready to date him.

But it's over now, and Kurt doesn't even have time to sulk over his broken dreams. Actually, those stopped being his dreams long ago. Right now, he has more urgent things to worry about, things that involve being a responsible and self-sufficient adult. He stopped being a teen long ago; a teen who had a father to pay his credit card while he spent his time daydreaming about the life he was never going to have.

New York stopped being charming as well. In fact, it's not a very charming city at all. Of course it looks like it's filled with magic when you are visiting. You get to see the prettiest places: 5th Avenue with all the designer's stores, Rockefeller Center, Broadway and its bright blinding lights, the elegant museums… Now the South Bronx? That's not so pretty, let alone when you have to walk back home in the middle of the night.

But it's just 9pm, Friday. His shift in Met Food just ended, and Kurt hurries to the bus stop in order to get on time to his second job at the VIP Club. If you ask him, that club is far from being a VIP club; in fact, it's nothing but a dirty rat hole, hidden between 5th and 6th Avenues, where dirty and closet gay men go to leer and put their hands on other men.

Yet, there are so many male strip clubs for men instead of women, Kurt doesn't mind much. It stopped bothering him long ago.

Somehow, he performs. Kurt doesn't think much about musicals nowadays, but back when he had to take the job, he told to himself that he would be just like Gypsy's Louise. Not everyone can perform in big and wonderful plays or musicals. Rose and Louise ended up in burlesque; well, Louise did of course. So Kurt thought about that, in order to keep the last drops of dignity that he had left. Sure, he wasn't performing in Wicked, but he would be on stage, and after all the shit he had been through before finding the VIP Club, he thought back then that this club could be something.

It's not something though. A job is a job, whether it is on stage or behind a cash register. When you have debts that hold five zeros, you stop being picky.

So Kurt takes the bus, and then the subway to arrive at 'The VIP' as he calls it in his head. Just in his head, since Kurt has never said out loud that he strips his clothes and gives lap dances for a living. He only talks about his job with his fellow dancers.

When he walks in, the place is dark, as usual. There are only dim red and yellow lights here and there and a few costumers. It starts getting crowded around midnight, but that's fine since he's there to wait tables; that's how people pick you for lap dances. If he's even luckier, he'll get some privates. Not only does a "private" mean more money, but also that way he doesn't have to dance in some guy's lap in front of everyone.

Stupid, because it's a strip club after all and no one really cares if you do such a thing; in fact someone could want "what that guy's having," and also Kurt strips in front of everyone on stage, but still… he likes privacy. Mostly for himself, to preserve what little modesty and self-respect he has left. It's always better to do something you're not happy about in front of one person inside of a small booth than on front of a crowd out in the open.

"Hey, Princess," Kurt greets his boss when he walks by the bar.

His boss is also the bartender, and sometimes Kurt works behind the bar with her. Princess – and that's actually real her name – doesn't fit the image of of a princess very well. She's actually huge, bulky and tall, and covered with tattoos, with bleached hair and nose and eyebrow piercings. Kurt could never tell her age, probably around fifty-ish, but she reminds him a lot to Coach Beiste.

But she's nice in spite of her tough appearance. Her twin brother, Crank – and that's his nickname, Kurt never learned his real name - is the thug that keeps guys in their place when they want to get too friendly with the VIP staff.

Princess keeps an eye on the customers from her spot behind the bar, as well.

Kurt always believed that homosexual men were generally classier, and that they didn't go around getting drunk and groping strippers. This experience has proved him wrong; sure, it doesn't happen as often as it must happen in a regular strip club – or so Kurt believes, he's never been in those clubs - but it does happen in here from time to time. Gay or not, men are men and when they can't handle alcohol well, when they drunk too much, stuff happen.

"Kurt, early as usual," Princess greets him as she cleans some glasses.

He shrugs. "I don't really have enough time to go back home and then come here, so…"

She nods. "You have a show at 2 AM, is that okay with you?"

"Sure. Anytime is fine," he says truthfully.

The good thing – if there is any good thing about this job - is that at least his schedule is pretty flexible. He usually stays all night, so he doesn't want to be on the streets in his neighborhood when it's dark and the bus doesn't run that often. But if he wants to call off the day at 4 AM, it's cool and he stays hanging out in the backroom or catching some sleep. But that only happens when he's too tired; he feels bad watching everyone but him working, so on days when he's not exhausted or he's not feeling ill, he stays behind the bar with Princess preparing drinks; boys behind the bar are not available for lap dances.

He doesn't need to be there every day, either; considering it's a club of questionable repute – Kurt presumes some cops or agents, whatever, are getting bribes - Princess does treat her staff pretty decently. They don't get dental or medical plans, of course, but since it's night work, their mandatory shifts are six hours a night, four nights a week. Kurt there Thursday to Sunday; on Mondays, The VIP is closed. It's up to the employees whether they want to be there other days and earn some extra cash. They are always welcomed to put in extra hours, since the club always looks better with more boys in the menu and more frequent performances.

They get paid by the hour, with a bonus for performances – not all the employees dance on stage – they get to keep all their tips, and the lap dance fees are split 60/40, 60 percent for the dancers and 40 percent for Princess.

It's August and Kurt is trying to work as much as he can before winter comes, so he's there almost every day, doing as much as his body lets him. He needs to make as much money is possible, since once the cold hits the city he'll start getting sick and he'll have to skip days at work, performances and everything. No one wants a guy who's coughing his lungs out in their faces; it's really not sexy at all.

He goes to the Staff Room where he greets some of his co-workers – he doesn't consider them friends but they get along very well - takes a quick shower and puts his clothes on. They can dress in anything as long it's slutty enough, since they wear black waiter aprons and carry the trays, so people know they are employees.

Princess doesn't let him dress _too _slutty though. She claims that his baby face is worth a lot and going around like some innocent boy ready to be perverted attracts a certain type of man. That's another thing Kurt learned about gay stripping clubs - you have to have someone to suit everyone's tastes. Unlike normal stripping clubs, where all you need are girls with big boobs, in The VIP the staff includes broad muscular guys, small guys, blacks, whites Asians and Latinos, guys who look more badass, emos, twinks, emo twinks, etc.

So Kurt is supposed to be the innocent one, and they call him "Babyface." It's slightly annoying since yes, for a while during his teenage years he did look like he was an infant, but he did grow up. Still, he assumes that he must indeed have some kind of child-like vibe since he does attract older men… _much_ older men. Yet, a job is a job, and as long as it pays his debts, Kurt it's okay with it. At least he doesn't have to sleep with them.

And Babyface is not even a terrible name. Marcus, one of the bears, is called 'Celine' by everyone in the club, since every time there's karaoke night, he sings only Celine Dion songs. He's always completely out of tune but it's funny, so Kurt doesn't mind much. But Marcus doesn't like having a woman's name as his nickname and Kurt agrees with him about that.

Kurt doesn't think much about his past. Yes, some odd days he finds himself remembering how un-sexy Blaine used to think he was. It doesn't happen very often though; Kurt hardly ever thinks about his days back in Lima.

It wasn't just Blaine; all his boyfriends, actually, thought of him as a huge prude… and he was. The worst part is that deep down inside, he's still is a huge prude, but who would have thought the un-sexy awkward boy could make a crowd cheer in excitement by taking his clothes off?

Probably no one, and Kurt would like to leave it that way, not telling anyone back home any different. It's something that doesn't make him proud in the slightest, but it's funny – in a tragic way - how life proved Blaine, Christian and Francis wrong.

His night goes by without major inconveniences. In fact, he makes some good money. It's Friday which, along with Saturday, is obviously the busiest night. Before his act, he does five lap dances, three of them private. He gets nice tips during his performance, more tips for waiting tables, and another six lap dances. He stays until 7 AM, helping Princess to close the club.

Exhausted, he leaves The VIP. It seems to be his lucky day because Bren – one of the emo twinks - offers him for a ride home and Kurt gladly accepts. Anything is better than taking the bus, and Bren is a nice guy, even if he's constantly talking about his boyfriend.

They say goodbye to each other when they reach Kurt's building, they'll be seeing each other tonight anyways, and Kurt walks inside.

His building is awful, but Kurt is used to it. Most of the windows are broken or have been replaced with wooden planks. It may have been white in the past, but now it looks grey, plaster is falling off and you can see several spots of exposed concrete and brick, not to mention the ugly graffiti.

The inside is not much better; it smells like pee and pot and some nice cooking sometimes. But every story has dirty floors and dirty walls; the cobwebs, the dust, and the paint peeling… It's a good thing that he stopped being a fashionista spoiled brat a long time ago; he would have gotten mugged and probably killed if he walked around here with his nose stuck up in the air and wearing designer clothes. Kurt doesn't own expensive clothes anymore; because of the cold, he's grown accustomed to walking with his hands inside his pocket, shoulders hunched forward and his chin almost touching his chest, so he mostly passes unnoticed.

He walks all the way up to the third floor, since the elevator doesn't work and probably never has.

He has nice neighbors though. A big black lady named Chantal lives across from him. She has five children. Sometimes, she offers him food that she cooks and it's amazing that she still has food to offer with all those kids to feed. At the end of the hall, there's a very old lady, Mrs. Forcible, who's always staring at everyone through the peephole of her door. She always brings Kurt his mail. She insists that some people steal other people's mail. She's a nosy old woman but Kurt doesn't mind.

Next to him live a couple of teens, Cody and Haley; the girl is pregnant and they are obviously trying to make it work. They look like they left their respective houses to prove to their parents they could be a family. Kurt doubts either of them is over 18. They moved to the building when Haley was four months pregnant; she's about to deliver the baby and it has everyone in the third floor excited.

Things like that makes Kurt excited; when life is shit, you find glimpses of joy in small things. His neighbor's baby who's about to arrive in this world, the moments when Jeff, the stoned musician of the across the hall, plays the guitar, filling Kurt's apartment with mellow music, the smell of a pie that Chantal is cooking…

Then there are some not so nice neighbors; Kurt doesn't know them but he's run into some of them. There are some drug dealers, and alcoholics and stuff, but it's like a tacit agreement that no one bothers them and they pretty much keep to themselves. Also, Kurt has been living there for the last two years, so everyone knows him and no one gives him much trouble.

Kurt gets inside the apartment and puts his money away. He'll go to the bank on Monday to pay his bills. Then he puts his daily two dollars in his Stove Fund jar and marks off the calendar; he's one day closer to his goal.

It's a small goal that he decided to achieve before winter. Kurt figured that there's nothing much he can do about himself; there are not a lot of solutions to his problems beyond just dealing with them, so he doesn't even waste time thinking about how he could change his life for the better.

He can't cancel his debts, his health is pretty much out of his hands, he won't be able to move to a better place when he owes so much money… he's fucked. He can't fix his life, but he might achieve something small: a stove.

Kurt stuck to the Stove Fund jar the picture of a pretty Fox Hill Electric Fireplace Stove that he found in a Sears magazine, along with a small calendar. It's $286, and it seems bizarre to him now that some years ago he could spend that just on a pair of pants. But back in those days, his dad paid his credit card. Now Kurt supports himself, and he has to pay debts, rent, his meds, the bus, the subway, electricity, water, etc. His perspective on money is very different than it was back then, and Kurt thinks about money most of the day.

Mostly because he doesn't have it.

But he doesn't want to go through another winter freezing, and above all he doesn't want to get sick. And maybe when he was a teenager $286 seemed like a normal price for a pair of designer boots, but now it's actually a freaking big deal. His economy is perfectly balanced; taking out $286$ would practically equal having a sudden black hole in his pocket. But Kurt figured that two dollars a day wouldn't make such a heavy impact on his income. Within five months, he'd be able to get his dreamed stove. He started saving money on July, so it means he'll have to go through October with cold, but he'll be warm –at least inside the apartment - for the rest of the winter.

Kurt takes one last hopeful look at the picture of the fireplace and gets himself ready for bed. It's Saturday morning and his father will probably call him around noon. They call each other every Saturday, and Kurt just lies about everything.

Kurt doesn't want to worry him; his dad had another heart attack three years ago, plus Kurt had worried him enough by ending up in the ICU for almost three months after catching terrible pneumonia.

Thankfully, his father doesn't visit him in New York. He did before Kurt fell ill, so his dad got to see his son's life when everything was perfect. His dad, Carole and Finn visited him one summer three years ago, right before the second heart attack, while Kurt was in college. He had his BFA in Fashion Design, and was beginning his MA in Fashion Studies, both at Parsons. He was also doing amazingly well in his internship at Prada, renting a beautiful apartment in a nice neighborhood in Manhattan, and his future was filled with nothing but great things.

Things are much different now, but Kurt doesn't let his father think otherwise. If his father wants to see him, Kurt travels to Ohio. Only in summer, and just for a week. Other times he claims being incredibly busy with the _upcoming collections_ to get out of going back to Lima. There's also the money issue. Kurt is supposed to be successful so he can't ask his father to pay for the plane or bus tickets to Lima. In addition, Kurt has a mirror – sadly - and he no longer looks the part of the fashionalbe, confident and driven young man he once was. Kurt prefers not to see his family, basically because he doesn't want them to see him, so he hasn't been home for over a year and a half, always claiming he's too busy.

It's a bitch that he has to upset his father by refusing to visit; it probably makes him look like a heartless douche… but Kurt can't pretend he's successful, healthy and wealthy anymore. The last time he traveled to Ohio was before he sold his designer clothes, so at least he could dress and play the part. But now his father would only have to look at him to realize right away that his life is shit and Kurt would have no option but to tell him the truth, and then his father would have another heart attack.

So it hurts Kurt to upset his dad, but he prefers that over giving his dad another heart attack.

Kurt wants to see his family though. He does, badly, but every time he's there being warm and pampered by the people he loves, it pains him terrible to go back to New York and face his real life.

Kurt would like to stay under his father's care forever and forget that New York ever existed. He'd be so happy if he could work in the garage every day from nine to five, close to his dad and Carole. Familiar faces, familiar people.

But that's not his life. Kurt stopped being a teen long ago; he's 23 and he has to support and be responsible for himself. It's not fair to dump that responsibility on his ill dad.

On the other hand, he has to admit that being away from everyone has its benefits. His unexpected present circumstances aren't so hard to deal with now that he's used to them. At least no one has to see what his life has turned into. It's like he doesn't exist to anyone who really matters. He doesn't keep touch with any of his old Glee friends or the people he got to know in college. And that's good, Kurt believes. It would kill him to run into Rachel, see how great she might be doing on Broadway while he works in Met Food and strips for living, gets sick too often, buys his clothes at Walmart if he's lucky, and lives in a building that looks like a crack house.

Although before he wanted to be under the spotlight, anonymity is something that Kurt learned to love.

Yet, he has to admit that not often, but sometimes, he does have the urgent craving of seeing someone that used to know him back in his old good days, just to remind him that once upon a time he was beautiful, his skin was flawless, he dressed to kill, his future was incredible and his life was perfect.

But at the same time he doesn't want that, because it's not pleasant to remember the fabulous person he used to be when his life is so miserable now.

So Kurt goes to bed, setting the alarm clock to 1 PM. His shift at Met Food starts at 2 o'clock and then he has a long night at The VIP to look forward to.

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><p>It's Saturday and Dave doesn't have much to do, as usual. He hates weekends, not even having work to keep his mind occupied. It's been five months since he moved to New York and he's still trying to get used to it. He liked Boston much better. Sometimes he wonders why he accepted this new job in New York; it wasn't like he was doing badly in Boston.<p>

Quite the opposite, he was going pretty well, at least professionally. And duh, he's obviously doing much better now; working for a bank was great for his resume, the money is also much more and he has good prospects for promotion. Being a financial manager is the most boring thing in the world, but Dave wasn't expecting it to be fun.

He did well in high school. In spite of his behavioral issues, he was a straight-A student. But he wasn't sure what he wanted to do with his life, so until he figured out, Dave decided to look for a job where he could earn good money. His grades got him into Kaplan and Dave was good at math so financial management seemed like an okay choice.

And he's done amazing well; his parents are so proud of him. With high grades he landed well-paying internships that got him to his first job at Massachusetts General Hospital. One of his teachers worked at the hospital and asked Dave – back then, the top student in his class – to be his assistant. He learned a lot and ended up on the hospital's finance team.

On a whim, he uploaded his resume to jobfinder website. He never expected that one day he was going to be called by American Express. Dave has his Master degree, but he got it last year. American Express was looking for someone with five years minimum work experience, but they still hired him.

It was a pain leaving Boston, but his teacher advised him to take the new job. The money was loads more and it was good experience as well.

And his new job is cool. His co-workers are okay, but he's younger and doesn't really have a lot in common with men who have wives and children. Their lives are quite different. When his colleagues talk about their kids' school concerts, wedding anniversaries, family meetings and so forth, Dave can only sort-of relate. They are still cool guys though and Dave gets along with everyone; they all go for drinks every Friday after work.

But mainly it's about money. Dave always wanted to build some nice future with someone beside him with solid ground under their feet and then figure out what he wants to do with his life for real, not having to worry about whether or not he'll be able to afford to achieve his dreams.

So his life is very comfortable and going according to plan. He has a nice car owns his apartment. He doesn't spend much money on himself, since he's not into expensive clothing and he's not a big fan of the latest electronic stuff, so he has more savings for… whenever he decides to invest his money in something. He's sort of healthy, his parents are safe and sound… but he doesn't feel particularly happy, content, or fulfilled.

It's hard making friends in a new city where he knows no one; he spends too much time on his own and that's never a good thing. He takes way too many pills, all prescribed by his shrink. Dave hates them all, but he still dutifully takes them at 10 AM, 4 PM and 8 PM just like his shrink told him to. They are supposed to make him feel better but having so many bottles of pills there right in front of his eyes, it's physical proof that his life is a mess.

Sometimes he goes out and finds some cute boy to sleep with, because luckily the pills don't affect his libido, but those hooks up never last more than one night. Dave doubts someone would want to have anything serious with him, no matter how cool his car is or how successful he's at work.

He always thought his issues would be over once he came out, so he came out after he left Lima, but things didn't get much better. Well, in a way, they did; it wasn't the end of the world, and his parents still love him. In addition, he doesn't have to hide who he is – sexually speaking-, so he gets to make out with men, pick up guys, and he's even had a couple of boyfriends but they never stuck around for long. Not that he really minded. Dave liked them well enough, but he never pictured a future with any of them. Dave doesn't blame them for dumping his ass though. No one could want to stay around with a guy who's fat and sweaty and don't even take his shirt off to get laid. Sex is great but not _that_ great since he has kinks, but the kind of kinks you don't share with someone you met just hours before.

At least he's not losing his hair.

Dave prowls around his apartment, not really knowing what to do. He strips down - leaving his tee on - and heads to the shower, trying to figure out plans for the weekend. He could go to some club; he still doesn't know a lot of places in New York's gay scene.

He'll check something in the Internet.

When he's done showing, Dave takes off his soaked tee, covering himself immediately with a towel. He puts on a clean black tee. Once he's covered, he dries himself and puts on underwear and sweat pants.

Dave returns to his bedroom, dropping down on the bed and turning on the TV. He doesn't pay much attention to what's being aired, he just like to have the TV on. He always considered the TV to be good company when you're alone. His stomach growls, and he instinctively puts his hand over his belly. He's not feeling hungry and he shouldn't be anyway. Last night after having some drinks with his pals, Dave had a huge craving of tacos. A craving he couldn't fight off, so on his way back home he ordered some Mexican food, and the huge binge of tacos and burritos began. He took care of that later, of course, in the solitude of his bathroom; his throat bothers him a bit now, but Dave knew at the time he had that coming.

He hates when that happens though, and it happens more often than Dave would like. He hates investing so much time, days and days following diets, to blow the whole thing in half an hour of swallowing food like he's a starved dog.

Dave sighs; he won't beat himself up again for that. He's weak, he knows that. He can only hope that he'll follow his diet properly from now on.

For now, he'll watch some show, sleep a little just to kill time, and figure out something for later tonight.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 **

Dave was more eager to just go out for the night than needy to meet someone; he'd never been to a gay strip club so he wanted to check out what it was about. But as soon as he steps inside, he begins to doubt he picked the best place; the VIP Club New York looked vastly different on the internet. Dave takes a quick look around the place and… well, it's definitely not the shiny and elegant establishment they showed on the website. But anyway are strip clubs supposed to look elegant?

The VIP Club is small and quite dark; red dim lights illuminate the place in a gloomy way. It seems more like some bar where nostalgic alcoholics go to drown their sorrows in whiskey than a place where you go to pick up a guy and have fun.

He can smell a not very pleasant mix of alcohol, sweat and air freshener in the air. The music is not loud like in others clubs Dave has been to, and in spite of the lugubrious and almost depressing aspect of the place, it's filled with people. The loud chatter coming from everyone is probably the only thing that adds a festive touch to the club.

Dave's not leaving, though. If he dragged his ass here, the least he can do is have a beer. The chances of finding some cute guy to take home for the night are slim, or so Dave thinks. Not because there are no cute guys around but because this place really takes away his desire to flirt; in fact, it even makes him a bit sad.

He fixes his baseball cap, lowering the peak a bit. It's an old habit from the days when he was still in the closet. Back then, he went to gay clubs but tried to pass unnoticed. He stopped trying to pass unnoticed long ago, but still wears his baseball cap every time he goes clubbing.

He resolves to have a drink and takes a seat on a stool located in a dark corner at the far end of the bar. From his seat, he can see the whole place. There are regular tables with leather chairs, most of them are occupied. In the middle of the club there's a stage, not very big and surprisingly it's close to the floor. Dave always assumed that all stages were at least three feet off the floor. There's even a freaking pole close to the edge of the platform.

He notices that there are some wooden booths on one side of the hall; at first he innocently believes those are old fashioned telephone booths, and then he realizes just how ridiculous that is. Nowadays everyone carries a cell phone. He spots a broad-chested guy with very few clothes on emerging from one of the booths, looking cocky and cheery, buttoning his jeans. Several seconds later, a very flushed man in a business suit comes out of the same booth, zipping up his fly.

Dave presses his lips in surprise. The website didn't specify they offered _those _kinds of services. He read about the lap-dances and he can see some of the waiters giving lap-dances to their customers. But Dave is not even tempted to get one for himself. It's not like he's still in the closet and doesn't like public displays of his desire for other men… but he's too self-conscious to have a guy grinding his lap in front of everyone.

He's okay with sharing chaste kisses in public, or holding hands… but heavy petting? Please, leave that for your bedroom. Straight or gay, it doesn't matter. Dave thinks it's just… well, not for him.

The bartender approaches him. She's a huge blonde woman covered with tattoos and piercings.

"Evening, young cub," she says. Her voice is low, almost husky, but she's smiling at him.

"Hey."

"First night in the VIP? I remember my costumers and I know I haven't seen you here before," she says, plucking a glass and some liquor from under the bar. She starts preparing a drink.

"I'm sort of new in town and, yeah, it's my first night in here," Dave replies politely.

She grins. "Well, you got here just in time. The show's about to start. I'm sure you're gonna love it. Want something to drink?"

Dave's eyes fix on the empty stage and then he returns his gaze to the bartender. "A beer would be fine."

The woman nods and brings him a bottle of beer. He thanks her and as she leaves to attend to other customers, Dave hurries to drink his beer. He's not feeling very comfortable in this place, and he needs to relax a bit. He promises himself that he's not going to get drunk, though; he can handle alcohol pretty well, but he's not in the safety of his apartment, and he really doesn't want to pass out in this place.

Suddenly, most of the lights of the bar go off and there's immediately a loud cheering and clapping that startles Dave a bit. He turns around and leans back against the bar, curious about the show that's about to start.

When the song starts playing, Dave doesn't recognize it. It's slow, somehow sensual… kind of bluesy. The stage is completely dark, and then one light goes on, illuminating the silhouette of a slender man wearing a hat. All anyone can see is his black silhouette, but still everyone cheers as soon as the guy appears in the stage.

The dancer doesn't move at first, and Dave can't help thinking it's kind of hot. Somehow the guy doing nothing is like a very hot tease.

Finally, the guy moves. Slowly and sensually, running his hands all over his body, and finally he starts walking firmly towards the pole. Dave can't freaking believe it. For some reason, he was expecting a huge muscular guy dressed up as a cop or something, dancing to _YMCA_. This though, this is… much different.

The stripper dances gracefully, spinning in place, then bending over, and the men sitting close to the stage are already going wild. Dave can see the guy better; he's sort of dressed up like a business man. Sort of. The jacket, shirt and tie are there, but no pants. Also, he's wearing tight, high black boots.

In a quick motion, the dancer opens his jacket and reveals a pair of pants. Dress shorts, really, so short that the jacket was covering them and now the stripper is playing with the waistband. Almost painfully slowly, the guy undoes the buttons of his short pants, while he swings his hips, making people go wild. In contrast of his slow motions, he quickly puts them down to the floor and steps out from them.

He immediately returns to the pole, dancing around it. It's freaking sexy in a classy way. Dave always thought strippers were kind of tacky, but this guy is proving to be different; the man kneels down with his back against the poll, pushing his thighs open with one hand while running the other hand all over his body.

The dancer straightens up slowly; he never stops swinging his hips to the beat of the smooth music. He's standing with his back to the crowd when he takes off his hat and tosses it away. Still facing away from the audience, the dancer starts removing his jacket and people start whistling. As his jacket falls from his shoulders, he walks away from the crowd and the pole. The guy catches the jacket with one hand before it hits the ground and spins it over his head before throwing it to the side.

Finally, the guy turns around to face the crowd and Dave frowns. He's not particularly close to the stage, but the club is quite small so he still has a pretty good view, and for the first time he can see the guy's face. Dave's not really focused in how the guy is working his tie while he sends lustful looks to the audience beneath him, because somehow that face looks incredibly familiar to him. Now the guy takes off his tie, playing with the audience by using it like a whip; as he dances around he bends over, sticking his ass towards the crowd and men don't waste any time stuffing money in his underwear.

Suddenly Dave's heart starts beating fast because he realizes who this guy reminds him of. The resemblance is almost creepy; hot but creepy. From where Dave is sitting, the dancer looks a lot like the boy that Dave wanted for the better part of his teenage years, and then his not-so-teenage years, and he can't manage to look away to prevent the painful clenching of his heart. It's impossible not imagine Kurt Hummel dancing like that, right in front of him, and Dave can hardly stand it. He used to have hot dreams about Kurt all the time, and even though Dave worked hard to get over the boy, those dreams still haunt him maybe once every second week.

Suddenly the dancer falls on his hands and knees, crawling sensually along the edge of the stage; more money goes into his underwear and Dave feels as turned on as he feels disturbed by the sudden wave of old familiar lust.

He doesn't want to have these images in his head; he's supposed to be over this guy. It's hot, but at the same time it's disheartening. He really doesn't want to go through the Kurt Hummel thing all over again. But Dave keeps his eyes fixed on the stage anyway, unable to look away because this guy reminds him of the boy he used to love, and even if that brought nothing but hurt to everyone, Dave is ready to fall into the fantasy all over again because he just can't help it. He's weak and he knows it; and he has never been good at dealing with the Kurt Hummel thing.

The guy keeps dancing, and Dave lets himself pretend he's actually watching Kurt dance and strip and crawl so sensually across the floor for him, even though in real life he wouldn't like Kurt to be a stripper. He tries to ignore how this make-believe Kurt never loses the chance to interact with his audience, sending lustful looks to the men below, offering his hips and ass while these men eagerly stuff money in his underwear. Dave ignores that part because this is a fantasy; an unexpected one, but still it's supposed to be just for him and he doesn't want to share Kurt with anyone. Yes, this guy is Kurt, and Kurt is doing this just for him, willingly, because in Dave's dreams, Kurt wants him, too.

Dave exhales, feeling hopeless. Why the hell is he doing this to himself again!

But the guy on his feet again, distracting Dave. He walks towards the edge of the stage with firm and confident steps, and finally he rips his shirt open, making the crowd go really wild. But Dave gasps as he feels his stomach flip inside.

The stripper is right at the edge of the stage, even closer than he was before; the lights are brighter now, illuminating him, and he's not wearing his hat anymore and-

_Oh, please God, no._

A million thoughts cross Dave's mind in a split second. The dancer is indeed Kurt Hummel, but Dave tries desperately to convince himself otherwise. There's no way in hell that the fabulous Kurt Hummel is now a stripper who gets money stuck his underwear by sleazy guys in a lousy gay club. If there was anyone at McKinley who was born to succeed in life, that was Kurt.

It pains him to see that the boy he was so in love with – not obsessed, his first therapist never really understood his feelings – has become this. Kurt was perfect, beautiful, proud and flawless, and he's not supposed to be climbing a pole in nothing but a pair of tight white boxer briefs while a bunch of horny dudes whistles at him.

Dave finds it hard to stay in his seat; he feels the sudden urge to run to Kurt, pull him off the stage and get him out of this smelly club.

But Kurt keeps on dancing, slowly, sensually and gracefully, and Dave is not strong enough. His mind and body betray him, because there's Kurt, just a few feet away from him almost acting out most of Dave's wet dreams. Dave always wondered how Kurt looked under his fancy clothes; he always assumed Kurt was gorgeous and now he can see he was right about that. Dave always thought Kurt was the sexiest guy ever, so he couldn't even imagine how much sexier Kurt would look while doing something deliberately sexual. Which is why Kurt's killing Dave right now.

Kurt jumps onto the pole, holding it while his body spins in the air and then he falls to the floor on his knees, so hot and so amazing. He grinds his back and ass against the pole. Straightening his knees but keeping his body bent over, he runs his hands all over his long legs.

Dave's own legs tremble and he thanks God for the bar stool or he'd be on the floor by now. He's getting aroused so quickly, which doesn't surprise him because seeing, thinking or dreaming about Kurt always had that effect on him.

This is real, though, which is depressing for both of them. This reality is terribly sad. But Dave can't manage to have any coherent thoughts, being completely absorbed in watching Kurt's incredible body and his sensual dancing.

And suddenly the lights go off. People are clapping loudly. Then the house lights come on and the noise of people talking and wandering around comes back. The stage is empty, and it's just like nothing had happened. Dave blinks, not understanding what's going on. It feels like someone just emptied a bucket of cold water over him.

He turns around, resting his elbows on the bar, trying to figure out what the fuck happened. Now Dave asks himself if he really did just see what he believes he just saw. He glances at the beer in his hand, frowning. There's no way he's drunk already, imagining weird shit after just _one_ beer. Sure, alcohol hits you worse on an empty stomach and Dave had barely touched any food since last night, but… _c'mon!_

Now he's pissed. He really doesn't want Kurt Hummel back in his life. In high school, there was no way to escape being near him. Until Kurt transferred for part of junior year, of course, and then Dave transferred for senior year so he didn't have to deal with Kurt anymore, at least not physically. He even managed to stop consciously thinking about him after some years. Yet the boy still haunts Dave's dreams for several reasons that he's not going to list right now because he has more urgent things to do, like to figure out why his mind is playing nasty tricks on him, again.

_That was not Kurt._

Obviously. It's impossible. Kurt wouldn't be a stripper; Kurt _cannot_ be a stripper. The boy must be starring in some huge musical on Broadway, or maybe working for some fashion magazine, but definitely not taking his clothes off in front of horny strangers.

So probably the dancer just resembled Kurt closely, or maybe not so closely, but the beer mixed with his obviously not-so-forgotten feelings towards Kurt to confuse him.

"Enjoyed the show?"

Dave looks up and the bartender is standing in front of him, grinning. He doesn't really know how to reply.

"That was… surprising."

The woman nods. "In a good way or a bad way? You certainly don't look disappointed."

Dave snorts and shrugs. "This is my first time at a gay strip club. I think I was kind of expecting something bold like, I don't know, some muscular guy with oil all over his body, wearing a cowboy costume, dancing to some Gloria Gaynor song."

The bartender lets out a loud short laugh. "We have that kind, too. Gay men are not like straights, young cub. Straight dudes are okay with any chick who'll show her tits; gay men… they have varying tastes. I like to please everyone."

And with that Dave agrees, since he wouldn't have much liked the striptease he just described.

"I enjoyed it," Dave admits. "A lot. I never thought striptease could involve… I don't know, class? That show wasn't tacky or tasteless like I thought they all were."

"That's Babyface for you," she says, nodding knowingly. "You'll never get him into some hot sailor costume gyrating to Donna Summer. But he does what he does well, since even the dudes who are not into guys like him like his act."

"Babyface?"

"The dancer."

Dave nods, feeling curious. "Does he have another name?"

The woman smiles at him. "No, he's Babyface in here. None of my boys use their real names. You know, to preserve their privacy. If they decide to reveal it, that's their call. But most of them use nicknames."

A guy orders a Scotch and the bartender starts preparing it. Dave, meanwhile, processes the lady's words. For a quick and stupid second, Dave expected her to tell him that guy was _not_ Kurt Hummel, so at least he could stop thinking bullshit. Which is ridiculous, because of course they wouldn't give the employee's names to strangers, and Dave is a stranger in here. But mostly because that guy was not Kurt; the idea of Kurt being a stripper... it's just absurd and Dave is an idiot for even considering the possibility.

He orders another beer, which the bartender delivers right away, and tries to cool off.

He wasn't expecting a Kurt Hummel moment to slap him in the face. It pisses Dave off, since now he'll probably be thinking about Kurt for the rest of the week and thinking about Kurt is never good. It only makes him feel angry and sad and self-conscious, and even more depressed than he already normally is.

Dave drinks his beer slowly, resolving that he should get a cab back home and once there, drink himself into oblivion so he doesn't dream about Kurt, at least not tonight.

"Hey, Princess. Got something for me?"

Dave's heart stops for real this time. He doesn't dare look up, and probably he wouldn't be able to even if he wanted to because his body is frozen. His blood runs cold through his veins.

That's_ his _voice.

"You were great over there, Babyface," Dave hears the bartender saying. "And yeah, table six. They just arrived. See what they'll be having."

"Okay. And thanks for the compliment."

Dave counts to ten before looking up, just a little. He doesn't see Kurt anywhere, but that was his voice. That voice is unmistakable; Dave secretly loved that voice just like he always loved everything about Kurt, and his stomach flips again, because he realizes that Kurt is right there, somewhere near him. And Kurt is Babyface - the guy who just stripped for a bunch of horny men in a crappy club.

He looks over his shoulder, trying to spot Kurt somewhere just because he's a freaking masochist. Dave knows he should be paying for his beer and running away from Kurt, but he still tries to find him in the crowd.

Almost immediately, he spots Kurt and it's like a ton of bricks just fell on Dave's head.

Kurt is right there, a few feet away from him. His hair is wet, like he just showered. He's wearing a pair of very tight jeans, a tight white tee and the little black waiter apron. Carrying a big round tray under his arm, Kurt walks over to a table where four guys are sitting and it seems like he's taking their orders.

_He's also a waiter._

Dave immediately looks away and his eyes randomly land on another waiter who's currently dancing over some dude's lap and Dave's throat constricts. He suddenly remembers the other waiter and the business guy who walked out of that booth after him and, _fucking Lord, _this can't be what Kurt has become!

The part of him that hated Kurt, it kind of rejoices in that thought. Kurt's life went to hell and Dave feels slightly good about it, since at least he's not the only one who has a miserable life. He has to admit that Kurt's got it worse, thought. But the other part of him, the part that loved Kurt, feels like shit because Kurt deserved the world and not this.

"Gin and tonic, two Margaritas and one Jameson on the rocks," Kurt's voice is near again, and Dave does his best to stay unnoticed.

"Give me one minute," the bartender says.

Dave slowly and smoothly raises his eyes, just a little, and catches the inimitable Kurt Hummel leaning back against the bar, just a couple of feet away from him. Kurt is not looking in his direction, thankfully; instead he's looking around the club.

"It's pretty packed tonight," he says in his beautiful soft voice. Dave catches a couple of guys leering at him but Kurt doesn't seem to notice. Dave fights the urge to go over and punch those guys in their faces.

"Well, it's Saturday. How you doing so far? Nice tips on stage?"

"I reached almost a hundred. Someone was either too drunk or too generous, but I got one fifty," Kurt replies and Dave's stomach clenches in disgust. Kurt sounds almost happy about it and… Jesus, 'almost a hundred'? A hundred is just pocket change to Dave; Kurt shouldn't be getting practically naked in front of strangers at all, but if he does, he shouldn't be selling himself so cheap, for Christ's sake! That body is worth millions. Dave always thought so, anyway; God only knows how many wet dreams he had after watching Kurt dancing to _Push It_ sophomore year. But now that Dave has actually _seen_ Kurt's almost naked body, he is certain - _definitely_ worth millions.

"Wow, congrats!" the woman replies. Apparently a hundred is a lot of money in here and that just disturbs Dave even more. "Here, there you go. Show yourself around a bit. It's Saturday, make the most of it."

Kurt snorts. "I think I showed myself enough already," he tells her, not sounding upset but not sounding like he's joking either. "But I will. Tonight's the night for it."

And with that, Kurt walks away. Dave looks up now, following the boy who's carrying all the drinks to the table with customers. Kurt still looks like a teenager and he can't be older than Dave himself, so at most twenty-three.

"See something you like?"

Dave blinks; the bartender just said something and when he looks at her, she's grinning at him with both hands resting on the bar. Dave can't even utter a word. Something he likes? He has lusted after Kurt Hummel for almost a freaking decade!

She laughs. "It's alright, young man. I know it's your first night in here but no need to act all shy. Wanna have fun with him?"

But Dave's not shy, he's dumbfound. He feels like for the past ten minutes he has been continuously hit by truck.

"I like him," he mutters and before he can even think about it, he blurts out: "Is he available?"

He realizes what he's just said. No! He can't- he won't-

"He is," she replies in a charming voice. "It's thirty bucks for the lap-dance; seventy for a private."

There's no way in hell he's going to pay Kurt to do anything to him. Dave has never paid for sexual favors, and he definitely won't start here, with _Kurt Hummel_. Of course, he'd give his life away to get Kurt doing anything sexual with him _willingly_… but not by paying for it. No one should be paying Kurt to do anything, because Kurt shouldn't be working here in the first place.

Still, Dave can't help wondering. "A private?"

The bartender gestures towards the wooden booths and Dave almost chokes on his own saliva. Somehow he hoped Kurt didn't do all the things the rest of the waiters did with costumers, even if he was a stripper.

But Kurt actually has sex with random guys? For seventy fucking bucks? What the hell is wrong with this world?

"Just seventy bucks?" Dave asks, scandalized.

"You can always pay more if you want to," the woman tells him, showing a bright smile. "We certainly won't mind. So you're having him?"

Does he want to 'have' Kurt? At some lousy club for _seventy freaking bucks? _It's a simple question that can be answered just by saying 'yes' or 'no.' But Dave doesn't know what to say.

Dave can't remember how his life before Kurt was; ever since he laid eyes on the flashy teen in their sophomore year, he's always felt connected to Kurt somehow. But no matter how much it hurt him, he accepted long ago that he and Kurt were never meant to happen. Not just because for the longest time he couldn't admit to himself that he was gay and not just because he was the biggest ass to Kurt at McKinley. There was also the fact that Dave hasn't changed much physically since high school, no matter how much he's tried and keeps on trying. When he sees himself in the mirror, he's still fat and sweaty. So really, he never had a chance as far as Kurt Hummel was concerned. Dave was never going to be the man of Kurt's dreams; Dave was never going to be a man Kurt could lust after, care about or love. Dave was never going to be the guy who'd take care of Kurt, cuddle with him on cold mornings or prepare fancy dinners for their anniversary. Dave was never going to be a guy Kurt could call beautiful. Dave was never going to be the man Kurt could fall in love with.

There were so many 'nevers' with Kurt. And Dave would be lying if he said that he didn'tthink about Kurt sometimes, even after not seeing him for six years, but he genuinely thought he was over his feelings for the man. Now those feelings are back suddenly. The mixture of bitterness, anger, frustration and angst is back, and Dave can hardly deal with it. It's like concrete proof of how much of a failure he obviously still is.

So yes, Dave would always be nothing to Kurt. But now he could 'have' Kurt, because Kurt is now a hooker. It's not what Dave wants for himself or for Kurt, or for them together. But as sad and pathetic as it might sound, being a random client is better than being nothing.

"Jeez, boy. Does having some fun with my cutie Babyface need so much consideration?"

The bartender's voice forces Dave out of his train of thoughts. He shakes his head quickly. "No, it doesn't," he says, trying to at least sound firm for her benefit, even if he's a nervous mess on the inside. Dave takes out his wallet and hands the seventy miserable bucks to the bartender, who flashes a smile.

He's going to 'have' Kurt Hummel. Jesus, he's actually going to _have_ Kurt Hummel? Dave can feel the cold sweat in his hands at this realization.

He can't deny he's already feeling aroused, even more after the incredible strip dance. Yet, the arousal is deep beneath the anxiety and the anticipation. Never in a million years did he expect to have Kurt in any way. When he woke up this morning, he couldn't possibly have imagined that by the end of the night he was going to have sex with Kurt.

Maybe this is a good thing. His old therapist told him that he had developed some kind of fixation on Kurt. Dave didn't like that word, since it wasn't like he was obsessed over the guy. It's just that Kurt was always related in everything he did. He was his first big crush. Because of Kurt, Dave realized he was gay. Dave looked up to him, fell for him and got his first huge heart break. Dave admired and hated him for being unreachable; he tried to be a better person for Kurt. Dave always hoped and dreamed and wondered a billion of things regarding Kurt, and nothing ever happened for real. Now he sees that perhaps his therapist wasn't all wrong. Kurt did get stuck in Dave's mind.

So maybe this is a good thing. Dave will finally get Kurt some way, and he'll be able to move on with his life once and for all, and for real this time, so if he runs into Kurt again someday, he won't have to go through all this again because there will be nothing to wonder about or to hope for.

Now he's also anxious, because Kurt is probably going to recognize him. Dave doubts that after tormenting the boy for years, Kurt has forgotten about him, and the fact that Dave looks exactly the same as he did back in high school doesn't help at all. It's going to be awkward, that's for sure. Will Kurt reject him? Dave believes that, being a hooker, Kurt must have had worse clients than himself… but he and Kurt have a history, a pretty bad one. Kurt has the right to refuse to have anything to do with him…

Dave feels like his heart is going to jump out of his chest. Maybe he should just go; this was obviously a very bad idea.

"Hey, Babyface. Someone's waiting for you," the bartender says loudly, making Dave flinch.

* * *

><p>Kurt tries not to think about how exhausted he feels. He got almost a hundred dollars in tips for his performance and that's a happy thought he should hold on to. But he still has a long night ahead; it's only 1 AM.<p>

"Thank you, cutie," the Jameson on the rocks says, winking at Kurt when he places the drinks on the table for the guy and his friends.

Kurt smiles at him, since you must win the customer's appreciation if you want nice tips or lap-dances. "Call me if you need anything," he tells the group, holding his gaze a bit longer with the Jameson on the rocks.

The guy is not even attractive, at least not to Kurt, but a customer's sex appeal is not something that really matters. Even if the hottest guy requested his services, Kurt would refuse to do it if he didn't need the money.

He turns around, heading back to the bar when he hears Princess calling for him, announcing he has a lap-dance. Kurt hurries his steps, hoping for a private

"You called me?" Kurt inquires when he reaches the bar, placing the tray on the counter.

Princess grins. "This young man here is asking for your private services," she says, pointing at some guy at the end of the bar, and yes! A private. Forty-two more bucks in his pocket!

Kurt turns around to face his new customer and his blood turns cold. Kurt feels like he's suddenly in one of those movies where everything suddenly goes into slow motion as his gaze falls upon the one and only Dave Karofsky, standing just a few feet away from him.

Kurt's throat grows tight. _He's been caught._

After over two years of living this life he despises, someone has just found out he became a cheap stripper; it's humiliating. And he's been caught by none other than Dave Karofsky, his former bully who made part of his high school years a living hell. Kurt is surprised to run into Karofsky here; not because it's a gay club, since Kurt knows quite well that Karofsky is gay, but… the world is a pretty big place; New York has plenty of gay clubs. Is life laughing in his face?

There's no coincidence here. There's no way that Karofsky didn't know who he was requesting. Karofsky obviously saw him and specifically asked for him.

Kurt eyes at the man standing in front of him, and a chill runs through his spine as he notices that Karofsky looks exactly the same as the last time Kurt saw him. They must be the same age, so that means Karofsky can't be older than 22 or 23, unless he had to repeat grades in school … but Lord, doesn't this guy age? What's even more mortifying, Karofsky looks fine and healthy. Kurt has a mirror in his apartment, so he knows he can't say he looks the way he did five years ago. He's not slender anymore, he's scrawny thin. His face lacks color, his skin is a disaster and no matter how much of an actor he might be, he is aware that he looks beaten down. Getting ill so often doesn't help. So it obvious that the closet jock Karofsky did better in life than Kurt. A pang of anxiety hits his stomach; Karofsky always hurt and humiliated him in the past… the club is filled with guys who are hotter than himself. Is Karofsky asking for a lap-dance from him as a way to shove in his face his graceless present?

Yet, between the shock and the embarrassment he's feeling, there's a glimpse of longing and joy. Karofsky's right there, looking the same as always, and for a moment Kurt feels alive for the first time in years.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? Kurt thinks sometimes that he is that three falling in the forest empty of people. He has no real friends, only co-workers, he hasn't kept in touch with anyone back in Lima but his family, and not even his family knows that, far from being in New York succeeding, he's in New York just barely surviving. And they don't know where he lives, either, or how he lives or how he's doing, so… does he really exist? Is his life for real?

He does exist.

The proof is standing there, a part of his old, good life right there, reminding Kurt that he once was someone. He still is _someone_, even if he doesn't like himself much.

And Karofsky wasn't even a friend; he was the complete opposite, but after years of living an anonymous life, Kurt's been found and it's sad for him to realize that it doesn't matter by whom.

He's been found.

"Booth six is free," Princess tells him and Kurt blinks, stepping out of his trance.

Taking a quick second look, Kurt can see that Karofsky doesn't look threatening. In fact, the other man looks like he'd rather be anywhere else but here, so Kurt doesn't let himself be intimidated. If Karofsky is doing this just to shame him by shoving in his face that he's a stripper, Kurt won't let him. Kurt's pride is beaten, but he won't show Karofsky that. For the first time in a long time, Kurt raises his chin up, feeling defiant about his screwed up present. Sure, Karofsky knows now that he's a stripper and lap-dancer, but hell, he's going to be the best lap-dancer in this horrible club.

"Follow me, big boy," Kurt tells the other man with a seductive voice, showing the flirtatious grin he learned to fake long ago. He walks ahead of Karofsky to the sixth booth.

He can endure this. He's done this thousands of times and for men much more disgusting than Karofsky. And Karofsky is not even disgusting; they just have a terrible history together. Karofsky will be just another customer of the hundreds of customers Kurt has had. At least Karofsky is under 40.

And Karofsky is not a stranger; he's probably the last person Kurt wanted to run into, but at least he's someone Kurt knows. Even if Karofsky tormented him and threatened him in the past, for some reason Kurt doesn't feel afraid or in danger. Karofsky is someone that belongs to his past, and as stupid and bizarre as it sounds, Kurt feels a bit warm inside about that.

Kurt peeks over his shoulder, just to check that Karofsky is following him through the sea of dancing people and he is; the music is loud so Kurt doesn't even try to talk with Karofsky, but that's okay, since he tries not to talk with clients generally. Kurt keeps his chin up, gaining more confidence. He's living a shitty present, but he's going to show Karofsky that he's as strong, fierce and confident as he was in the past, even if Kurt knows he's not that guy anymore.

When he reaches the small wooden booth, he takes a deep breath, opening the door and stepping inside. There's not a lot of room, just enough for getting inside, leaving some space for a second person getting in behind you, and the chair, of course.

The booth immediately feels packed when Karofsky steps inside, closing the door behind him, and it's not surprise since the man is quite big. Yet, before Kurt has time to turn around to sit his brand new customer in the chair, there's a pair of strong arms wrapping around his torso and a mouth sucking his neck, startling Kurt.

"Wha- _oh, fuck,"_ Kurt groans, pushing his back against Karofsky as if he's looking for more contact, and tilting his head even more to give his former bully more access.

Kurt can hardly understand what the hell is going on, or better to say, what the hell he's doing. Karofsky's hands are roaming all over his body while he sucks and kisses his neck and Kurt is letting him. What's worse is that he's enjoying it and he's not supposed to.

But strong and warm arms are holding him tightly and Kurt can't help melting. It's been so long since the last time he's gotten a bit of affection, other than being slapped on his ass by some random customer or getting groped without his consent but, well, it's his job and he has to endure it. Yet this…

He can hear the hot sounds Karofsky lets out and Kurt groans loudly as the other man sucks his earlobe. Kurt's body is acting by itself, because as soon as Kurt feels Karofsky's hot breath in his ear along with the low amplified grunts he can hear now, Kurt grinds against him like some cheap whore.

"Fuck, you're so fucking hot," Karofsky says, almost whimpering, and Kurt's brain cells practically melt. He can't control his body; he throws his arms back, trying to catch Karofsky somehow and his hands land on the bigger man's head. Kurt fists Karofsky's hair, pushing Karofsky's face harder against his already mistreated neck, but Lord, it feels amazing. Kurt never knew his neck was this sensitive and he's had boyfriends kiss his neck before. But Karofsky is not kissing the skin of his neck; he's ravishing it and Kurt hasn't been so turned on in ages.

Karofsky's rough hands travel fast all over his body and Kurt lets out a loud, surprised moan when his customer presses the heel of his hand against Kurt's crotch.

"Oh, fuck!" Kurt moans. He's incredibly hard, and Karofsky squeezes his erection, making him moan even more and, acting as if some kind of wanton whore possessed him, Kurt grinds his ass against Karofsky's crotch.

"Shit, _Kurt_," Karofsky breathes out lustfully, and Kurt doesn't even have time to think how weird it is that Karofsky just called him by his name. His name has never sounded so hot on his boyfriends' lips and it only turns Kurt on the more.

Kurt can feel Karofsky's hard erection against his ass and Kurt only presses himself harder against him, as Karofsky continues working on Kurt's hard-on. Kurt can't process a coherent though; it's like they are both desperate for it and he doesn't know about Karofsky, but Kurt hasn't done anything remotely sexual in the past two years, and never in his life did he grind on any of his boyfriends in a public place.

But here he is, grinding against none other than David Karofsky and Kurt has never felt so hot. It's messy, rough and rushed and that's fine, even if it's something that Kurt would never have done if his mind wasn't working so wrong.

He gasps when in a quick motion, Karofsky opens the button of his jeans, pulling the zipper down and pushing his hand inside Kurt's pants, fisting his bare erection.

"Fuck, _Dave!"_

Kurt doesn't even know why he just called him that way. They are strangers to each other, but not completely. It's probably because Karofsky just called him 'Kurt', or because 'Karofsky' is too much of a mouthful to moan, but it seems to drive _Dave _insane. He pumps Kurt's cock hard and fast, and God, Kurt can almost see the stars.

They are still not facing each other; Kurt has his back to Dave and Dave is groping him from behind, and Kurt has to fight the urge to turn around and face him, to at least kiss him. Their first and only kiss was terrible, and now they are engaged in a situation that is dirty, and probably wrong, but it's still intimate because Kurt doesn't do this kind of things with strangers. Kissing is part of that intimacy, even if it's happening in some nasty booth at a nasty stripping club.

But Kurt doesn't turn around. No matter how turned on he is, he's aware that this is wrong and very deep inside, he's ashamed of himself. So he stays in his place, letting Dave touch him while he grinds his ass against his customer's erection.

"I'm gonna fuck you so good," Dave whispers lusciously against his ear and Kurt freezes on the inside, but his body keeps on moving, welcoming all Dave's rough attentions.

A wave of anxiety hits Kurt. He hasn't done anything remotely sexual in the last two years, but sex itself… it's been much longer since the last time he had sex for real.

Judging by the way his body clearly wants this, in spite of the few brain cells that keep telling Kurt this is a bad idea, it seems that he's going to have sex, not with a long term boyfriend, not after some romantic dinner, not in a comfortable king size bed, but in a dirty wooden booth, with his enemy from high school whom he just ran into five minutes ago after six years.

It's not rocking news that someone's going to have sex in here. Kurt knows his workmates and he knows that occasionally when customers are hot and willingly, the boys have sex with them instead of giving them just the lap-dance they paid for. Kurt has never done such a thing. He has never slept with a stranger.

But Kurt moans when Dave presses him against the carpeted wall of the booth, and grows hotter when he hears Dave's top button pop as he obviously opens his jeans. They are really going to do this; Kurt is not this kind of person, or at least he wasn't until now, and he can't understand what that means but he doesn't even try to figure out why he's doing this, since his body is being driven by a lust he's never felt before, instead of his good judgment.

Dave releases Kurt's cock to shove his jeans below his hips and then he yanks down on the back of Kurt's underwear, pulling it down roughly. Kurt can't help shivering, feeling exposed as his cock jumps over the waistband, but Dave immediately fists it again.

"Oh, God," Kurt moans.

"Like that?" Dave inquires with a cocky tone of voice.

_No._

"Yes," he whimpers because he likes it, even if he shouldn't.

Kurt's pressing his cheek against the wall covered with nasty red carpet with his eyes closed, standing on his feet, sticking up his ass for none other than Dave Karofsky. He can't get any lower than this.

But he doesn't think about that. Instead, he strokes his own cock when Dave releases it, and Kurt can hear him opening the package of a condom that thank the Lord Dave has. Kurt doesn't even own condoms, and the last thing he wants is catch some STD from his first random.

After all, Kurt and Dave are having sex within five minutes of seeing each other. Kurt has no clue how many men Dave has slept with, Dave could be quite a slut.

Yet Kurt is doing exactly the same and… he doesn't want to think about how much of a slut he is, even if he's behaving like one since he freaking purrs as he feels Dave's hands running over his buttocks.

"So fucking perfect."

"C'mon, Dave," Kurt hears himself almost whining.

Dave presses his body closer to Kurt. His erection pressed against Kurt's ass and a shiver runs through Kurt's spine; it feels big.

"Spread your legs," Dave orders, putting a foot against Kurt's feet and kicking them apart. Kurt's breathing grows erratic in anticipation and fear. But he knows he's not afraid of Dave; he's afraid of all this.

He's never done this kind of thing, ignore his better judgment and act out of pure lust, and it scares him. Still, he wastes no time spreading his legs and raising his ass for a better angle.

He can hear Dave letting out a shaky breath. "God, yes," Dave growls, his breath hot against Kurt's ear and Kurt moans again.

Dave rubs his dick up and down Kurt's crack and Kurt frowns immediately as he feels the pressure in his ass. He jerks, hitting Dave with his elbow, and growls. "You better prepare me," he warns, feeling hot and mad.

Kurt wants this badly, and he wishes they could just do it, but not without preparing. And Dave is obviously an inconsiderate bastard, but Kurt shouldn't be surprised about that.

"Why should I prepare you? You're a-"

"You prepare me or this is not happening," Kurt cuts him off. He hasn't had sex for over two years; he's not going to let Dave or anyone shove their dick inside his ass just like that.

"Guess you have some lube? 'Cuz I don't carry a bottle of lube in my pocket." Dave talks to him like he's stupid and for the first time, Kurt looks back just to glare at him. "Take that as a no."

Kurt groans, frustrated; he's horny. Too horny for his own good; he had to stand the dumb former jock Dave Karofsky turning him on like this to end up getting nothing?

He doesn't have time to complain, though, because Dave's thick fingers are suddenly pressing against his lips.

"Suck," Dave commands, and while at some other moment Kurt would be angry or offended at such treatment, now he sucks Dave's fingers like they're something delicious and what disturbs him is that he's actually doing this willingly and eagerly, instead of feeling grossed out or mad. "Oh, fuck just like that," Dave groans, making Kurt moan.

It's got to be his ridiculously horny state. Over the past two years, Kurt can't even remember having a wet dream. The only things in his mind have been paying his debts, working his two jobs, avoiding getting ill, hoping to get better when he fell ill, wishing summer was longer, worrying about the cold weather, hoping winter would be over soon, his debts again, his jobs and how tired he is.

And now he's incredibly turned on, not thinking for one second about what he's doing, where he's doing it and who he's doing it with. He's not thinking about anything but how much he needs to get Dave's fingers wet so he can prepare him and they can fuck already.

So Kurt sucks him fervently and wantonly and he even moans while he does it. He's enjoying this; it makes no sense but Kurt doesn't care right now. He'll freak out and hate himself later. Dave runs his tongue over the back of Kurt's neck, right over his spine and then he presses his lips against his skin. Kurt can feel his hot breathe and shivers when Dave bites him, grunting words that Kurt can't make out.

Dave pushes himself away from Kurt, keeping his fingers inside Kurt's mouth. As he continues sucking them, Kurt's eyes go wide when he hears Dave spit, and even wider when he feels the spit coming down his crack. Kurt's so shocked that he can't manage to step out of his scandalized state to yell at Dave.

Someone just spit on him!

But Dave takes Kurt's cock and strokes it; Kurt forgets about the spit running down his ass and he actually bites Dave's finger in order not to scream. Dave doesn't seem to mind the pain.

"I think that's enough," Dave says, pulling his fingers out of Kurt's mouth and Kurt actually bites the air, trying to catch Dave's hand again to keep on doing what he was doing.

Lord, what the hell is wrong with him?

Before he can even know what's happening, Dave shoves one finger right inside Kurt's hole. Actually, Dave tries to, since he doesn't get too far inside.

But it hurts so much that Kurt can't help screaming in pain; Dave stops immediately, either because he doesn't want to hurt him or because he can't go any further, but he doesn't pull away.

"Shit, shit, I'm sorry," Dave gushes out, sounding guilty and concerned, and he should, that bastard. Dave presses a kiss on Kurt's shoulder as Kurt tries to relax to ease the pain. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. You're so damn tight."

It's impossible not to notice that Dave didn't expect that. Kurt quickly figures out that Dave has no clue about his sex life, so it's not Dave's fault he doesn't know that Kurt hasn't had sex for over two years. Considering Kurt's atypical behavior, Dave must think he has sex with strangers quite often, so maybe Dave is still just the brutish man he used to be, but the current situation is not entirely his fault.

And Dave actually sounds guilty, so Kurt doesn't think he wanted to hurt him.

"Just go slow, alright?" Kurt breathes out, still trying to relax. He is indeed incredibly tight; Dave has not even one finger inside him and it feels like too much.

Out of the corner of his eye, Kurt can see Dave nodding quickly. "Anything you want, baby. Promise I won't hurt you," he says, with a pained voice that almost kills Kurt.

Why is this so freaking good? It's not supposed to feel this good but Dave sounds concerned and it's been so fucking long since the last time someone took care of him, in any way, that Kurt can't help

melting. Dave (Jesus he keeps on calling him _Dave_ inside his head)... Dave just called him 'baby' and Kurt has never been into pet names but Lord…

And the sex… Dave slowly pushes his finger inside Kurt's entrance. Kurt presses his forehead against the wall, breathing erratically but trying to calm himself down. There's no turning back; he's aware that he shouldn't be doing this at all, but he is, so if he's going to feel like hell later, at least he should have a good time now.

Kurt's never been good at sex in the past, so there's a big chance that tomorrow he'll be embarrassed, guilty and sore after an awful lay. But having gone so far with this, at least, he wants to try to feel good.

So Kurt does his best to ease his muscles, even if it hurts a lot. Dave moves slowly inside and out, but the pressure feels almost unbearable. He doesn't say anything, though; Kurt presses his lips together so as not to let out a sound, since he doesn't want Dave seeing him being weak.

Kurt trembles when Dave's hand finds his cock again, stroking it, and Kurt can forget for a bit about the pain to focus on the pleasure. The air inside the booth grows thick and heavy; Kurt can hear the music coming from the outside but inside there's a deep silence and the only sound to hear is their breathing. Dave pulls out his finger and spits again, to stick two slick fingers inside Kurt.

"Oh, God," Kurt chokes, torn between pain and pleasure. Dave strokes Kurt's cock even harder, obviously trying to keep his mind focused in something else.

It seems like a lifetime to Kurt before he finally starts feeling stretched. Two fingers become three and these are not the best circumstances considering there's no bed where they can lie down and there's no lube, but Dave is preparing him patiently; Kurt has to give him credit for that.

Dave's fingers press on Kurt's prostate just slightly, rubbing it slowly and making his legs tremble.

"Dave, please," Kurt whimpers. "Do it now."

"Are you sure?" Dave asks, uncertain.

Kurt is not really sure; he still feels tight and Dave's cock felt much bigger than three fingers. "Yes, c'mon," he says, almost pleading because the preparing has become a terrible tease.

"You've got it, babe," Dave almost growls, his hot breath once again on Kurt's ear, making Kurt shiver.

He almost misses the intrusion when Dave pulls his fingers out, unwelcoming the emptiness; Kurt doesn't mind when he feels spit once again in his ass. It's probably one of the most disgusting things he has ever done, but he reminds himself that spit is better than no lube at all.

Dave releases Kurt's cock, and holds him by his hip with one hand while with his other hand Dave rubs the tip of his cock, slick with spit, up and down Kurt's crack, and Lord, Kurt places his hands against the wall, trying to prepare himself from what it's about to come.

Finally, Dave pushes the head of his cock slightly inside Kurt. It feels huge; both of them moan, Dave probably in pure pleasure but Kurt in pleasure and discomfort. Of course this is not going to feel just good. The pain hits him almost immediately as Dave starts forcing his dick inside him.

Kurt starts panting; this was a huge mistake. "Oh, God, oh, God."

Dave shushes him tenderly, running his hand along his back. "I'll be good. Promise. I want to be good to you."

Kurt doesn't even have time to process what the hell does that mean, since all he can think about is how he feels he's about to split open. Dave waits, and Kurt tries to relax even though Dave's cock seems to be huge inside him. Kurt takes a few deep and desperate breaths, until with a shaky voice he asks Dave to continue, hoping that Dave's cock won't be too long. He doesn't know if Dave is actually huge or it's just that it's been so long since the last time he had sex… Just the head feels huge; if his cock is long and thick… Kurt doesn't even want to think about it.

Dave doesn't say anything; Kurt just feels him lean against him with all his weight as Dave slowly pushes the rest of his dick in. Kurt inhales sharply at the pain since Dave's cock seems never ending.

"Fuck!" Kurt moans, mostly in pain. Dave's hips are right against Kurt's buttocks, he's all the way inside and he stops moving. Kurt pants even harder, not knowing how to escape from this incredible pressuring pain inside him.

Dave's arms are suddenly around him; he kisses Kurt on his neck and then one of his hands travels all the way down his torso until it finds Kurt's cock. Kurt was quickly losing his erection, the pain being a huge turn off, but Dave pumps it, making Kurt forget a little about the throbbing ache.

"God, you feel so good," Dave whispers lasciviously, and even if right now Kurt can't manage to say the same, Dave's words turn him on. He's almost sure that none of his ex-boyfriends has lusted after him like Dave seems to be lusting after him now. It's probably the first time that Kurt feels desired for real while being off-stage.

"Move," Kurt requests, feeling encouraged.

"Are you-"

"Just move," Kurt cuts him off, impatient even if he's still in pain.

And Dave moves, painfully slowly. Kurt can tell by the way Dave's gripping his hip that he's fighting hard not to go faster. It's painful, but Kurt's brain is melting in desire, so feeling that his pleasure is once again taking the lead, Kurt fights off the pain and meets Dave's slow thrusts.

"Shit, Kurt. Stop," Dave almost pleads, but he doesn't really stop Kurt's movements. "You're gonna make me hurt you."

Kurt grins with his mouth open; he's clearly possessed and by now he doesn't care. For some reason, Kurt's not afraid of Dave, either. He doesn't think that Dave's going to hurt him; this hurts because Dave must have some enormous cock and Kurt hasn't had sex in years.

But Kurt can't manage to fear Dave, probably because he's so horny that the adrenaline he's feeling running through his veins is clouding his good judgment. Or maybe because Kurt can't help feeling good at having Dave's warm body pressed against his back. A part of his past is back, a bad part of his past that is fucking him standing against a wall, holding him close and tight and it's been so long since the last time Kurt's been held…

_Fuck, it feels so good._

Kurt buries his ass deeper and harder, ignoring the ache since he's so driven that he doesn't care anymore; he wants the most of this. Dave gasps; now both his hands are holding Kurt's hips still. Kurt can tell he's going to be not only sore but bruised tomorrow, since Dave's fingers are digging deep into his skin.

"Hummel, you'd better hold still," Dave grits between his teeth and Kurt wants to laugh. Are they back to last names? "I'm not gonna hurt you."

The whole situation is ridiculous and bizarre and if he could, Kurt would burst into some hysterical laugh because he can't believe himself and his life. Kurt's the lamest guy in the sex department and he's actually pushing this almost stranger, whose huge cock is inside his ass, to fuck him harder?

Kurt's always been a guy who wanted only soft and romantic sex. This is completely different from anything he's ever done, and yet he's never been so aroused in his life.

"Who says you'll hurt me?" Kurt breathes out defiantly, still trying to get used to Dave's cock.

For some reason, the whole situation is too arousing and Kurt doesn't even think about the ache he's feeling. Dave pulls his cock inside and out, so painfully slowly that Kurt starts growing frustrated.

"Faster, please," Kurt begs, and finally Dave listens to him because he starts increasing the speed of his thrusts. "God, yes."

He's still uncomfortable, but it doesn't hurt that much. Dave stops holding Kurt's hips so tightly, and Kurt almost misses the pressure, so he puts his hands over Dave's hands, forcing him to hold him tight.

"Fuck, Kurt," Dave grunts, taking the hint and almost digging his fingers in Kurt's skin. It seems that it turns Dave more, because he starts fucking him harder.

Kurt gasps, quickly placing the palms of his hands against the wall in order not to lose his balance. It's not the most comfortable position; Dave is taller than himself, and being on his feet Kurt doesn't provide much access, making his ass even tighter. So Kurt bends a bit at his waist, bracing himself against the wall, and he pushes himself against Dave.

Dave starts fucking him hard and fast for real now. Kurt is so turned on that he can't process any pain. He moans loudly, hoping that the loud music outside will conceal his voice; he's never been so loud while having sex.

Dave pulls his cock out of Kurt's hole, only to shove it all the way in and Kurt hisses all the air out of his lungs, to then yell in ecstasy, "Oh my God! Yes, there!"

Lord, his prostate... it's been so long! Blaine hardly ever found it, Christian was better at it but he was more focused on jerking him off than making the actual fucking pleasant, and he topped with Francis so… it's so great to feel like this again.

It only encourages Dave, because he keeps on thrusting hard inside Kurt, always burying his cock to the hilt at the exact same angle, making Kurt moan like the biggest whore. Kurt can't believe he's feeling so good, but Dave is fucking him so well that it doesn't make any sense.

Kurt bends over some more, and starts pushing back as fast as he can. Now his prostate is being smashed constantly by Dave's cock, sending constant waves of pleasure to Kurt's brain. He's losing it. He's never felt this hot and aroused while being fucking, and now that he's actually getting pleasure from having some cock in his ass, Kurt's desperate to have all the pleasure he can get.

God only knows all the stuff he didn't know sex can provide!

One of Dave's hands find Kurt's hard cock, fisting it, and Kurt growls loudly. He'd forgotten that he's so painfully hard. It's too overwhelming. Dave keeps his pace, pushing his hard cock in and out, constantly hitting Kurt's prostate while he jerks Kurt's hard erection.

"You're so fucking good," Dave says between breaths.

Kurt can't even say a word, his mouth being dry from so much panting and moaning. And he's too focused on the fucking to process anything coherent anyway. Dave jabs his cock inside him, harder and moving faster. Kurt can feel himself reaching his climax, but he does his best to prevent that from happening.

He needs to enjoy this a little longer.

Kurt's body jerks with the force of each thrust as Dave's fucking gets faster, if that's even possible. Both are breathing raggedly now; Dave slams his cock inside Kurt's now widely stretched hole and Kurt pushes himself towards Dave to help him get deeper.

Until he can't hold it any longer. "God, no," Kurt breathes out, almost devastated. "I- I'm- I'm gonna come."

His muscles tighten around Dave's hard cock. "Oh, fuck!" Dave growls. "Come, come for me," he grunts, squeezing Kurt's cock harder and then all Kurt sees is white.

"Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God, _Dave!_"

He comes as hard and as violent as he ever has. He shoots his load against the wall and the floor, and Dave strokes his cock all the way through his orgasm. His body spasms and he quickly goes boneless, but Dave's arms are suddenly around his torso, preventing him from falling to the floor.

Kurt can't move; he's still too dumbstruck and drained, since his orgasm hit him like a truck. Dave holds him on his feet, Kurt's back resting against his chest, as Dave's thrusting his cock faster inside Kurt's ass, still hitting his oversensitive and wretched prostate, and Kurt lets out almost a sob because he can't take this anymore. His body is still processing the big hit of pleasure he just felt from coming so hard, he can't take any more pleasure.

"Just a little more, I'm close too," Dave mutters, slamming harder.

Kurt melts against Dave, panting and moaning. It feels like his own orgasm lingers because of Dave's accurate movements.

After what seems ages but is actually just a few seconds, Dave slams against him one last time, growling loudly his name along with God's. Kurt feels Dave's heavy and erratic breath against the back of his neck, and for some reason, Kurt smiles. Still with his cock buried inside Kurt's ass, Dave stumbles and lets himself fall carefully on the chair in the middle of the booth, where he was supposed to sit for the lap-dance.

Dave takes Kurt with him, and sitting on Dave but still with his back to him, Kurt eases, feeling Dave's body relaxing as well. Kurt could stay there forever. He's content and warm; a pair of strong arms around his torso is holding him tight and everything feels perfect.

But as they start recovering their breaths, the silence starts ringing in Kurt's ears while the music outside sounds louder. Kurt starts cooling off, and the realization of recent events hits him like a slap in the face. His mind is not clouded by lust, or insanity, or whatever it was that possessed him minutes ago.

Kurt is almost panicking. He just had sex with Dave Karofsky! Karofsky's limp cock is still inside him, and Kurt is sitting on his lap being held-

_Oh, Lord. What the fuck have I done?_

He needs to get out of here. He needs to leave this booth and this club. Probably even the city, or maybe the freaking planet. He just let Dave Karofsky fuck him hard and rough, on his feet against a freaking wall in a lap-dance booth! What the hell is wrong with him?

Kurt carefully stands up. He shivers as he feels Dave's cock sliding out of his ass, and he hears Dave gasping. Then he avoids Dave's gaze. Kurt pulls his underwear and pants up, and mutters what he always says when he's done with a lap-dance. "Show's over. Good night."

He doesn't even stay to listen to Dave say anything. He storms out of the booth, heading as fast as he can to the Staff Room, away from Dave Karofsky. No one is in there and in his solitude, Kurt wants to cry.

What did he do? How come he turned into some needy slut? His gaze falls upon the wall clock, and he's horrified when he notices that it's only half past one. In the last half-hour he stripped in front of people, took a shower, served a table and _got fucked_ by Dave Karofsky. How much time did he spend with Karofsky inside that booth? Ten minutes?

It's even worse when Kurt examines himself in the mirror and finds two huge hickeys on his neck. Stress hits him and suddenly he can't breathe. He doesn't get asthma attacks very often. Sometimes he has to turn to his inhaler at work, since people smoke in the small club. But he's never had an asthma attack triggered by stress before.

Kurt tries to take deep breaths, but every cell in his lungs is constricting and Kurt desperate digs in his locker for his bag in order to find his inhaler. When he does, he takes two puffs of medicine and lets himself fall into a chair as the air slowly expands his lungs.

Now able to breathe better, Kurt thinks again about what he just did. What makes him feel even worse is the fact that he enjoyed it. He moaned and begged like some wanton slut. He never behaved like that with his boyfriends… but he did with some stranger, out of nowhere. He can't stand himself. He can't stand his embarrassment.

He stays in the Staff Room for the next half-hour, hoping that Dave has left. He's so ashamed of himself that he wouldn't be able to deal with facing Dave again, not after what he did. What they did.

Kurt dares to step outside the room around three in the morning, but not before borrowing a neckerchief from one of his colleagues' lockers to conceal the hickeys on his neck. He scans the club and finds no trace of Dave, so he heads to the bar and goes behind it. Princess is surprised to see him.

"Where were you? Are you alright?"

Kurt nods, quickly grabbing some glasses to clean. "My breathing," he lies, but it's a good lie since it's common knowledge at work that he has breathing troubles.

"Oh, honey," Princess says sympathetically. "Shit. On a freaking Saturday? Not your day, hon. But stay here for the rest of the night, okay?"

Kurt nods.

Dave is gone, that's for sure, and the last thing he wants right now is another man groping him or slapping his ass. Kurt only wants to disappear, but it's Saturday night, he can't go back to his place at this hour, and he still needs the cash. He'll already lose all of tonight's tips and lap-dance money.

So even if he still can feel Dave's cock stretching his ass, Dave's hot mouth on his neck and Dave's fingers digging into his hips (Kurt hasn't looked, but he's sure he has bruises there, too) he busies himself with work.

He was stupid, but he still needs to pay his debts, so Kurt focuses in work and pushes all thoughts of Dave Karofsky out of his head.


	3. Chapter 2

****Title:** **About trees and empty forests.**  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> **Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.**  
><strong>Rating:<strong>** PG for now. Nc17 not so much later.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong>** Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.**  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> **Season One and Two.**  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Ella Greggs.  
><strong>Word Count:<strong>** 78oo this chapter.**  
><strong>Genre:<strong>** Romance/Angst/Drama.**  
><strong>Disclaime<strong>r:** Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it**.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves. But then one night they meet again, in an unexpected way and in an unexpected place and everything changes.**  
><strong>AN:**** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2<strong>

The following day after his encounter with Karofsky, or rather _Dave_, Kurt stays in bed the whole day hating himself and he's so ashamed he can hardly stand it. To make matters worse, as expected, he's sore. No matter how hard he tries to stop thinking about what he did the previous night, he has bruises on his body, along with the ache coming from his backside, to remind him.

The encounter repeats over and over in his head, but still Kurt can't find any explanation for his behavior. He's only been in three serious relationships in his life, and because those were _serious_, his ex-boyfriends are the only people Kurt has ever slept with. Blaine during his senior year of high school; then Christian, a cute barista from the café where Kurt used to have breakfast before class during his first year at Parsons; and then Francis, a classmate who got into the same Prada internship program as Kurt.

All of them equally sweet, handsome, romantic and patient with him. So maybe they didn't make love as often as other couples. Maybe it wasn't as hot and exciting as perhaps it should have been. Kurt has never been able to feel fully comfortable with sex. His ex-boyfriends always told him it didn't bother them, it was no big deal, they adored him anyway.

Of course, that was all bullshit. When Blaine dumped him and immediately started dating Sebastian, the biggest whore at Dalton Academy, Kurt found it hard to believe sex (both quality and quantity) was not the issue. Later, Kurt found out Blaine had been cheating with Sebastian behind his back for several weeks before their breakup. It was obvious then that while Kurt had movedBlaine, Sebastian had also _moved_ Blaine, but in an entirely different way.

But Blaine was a douche and Kurt got over him; especially after he met Christian, another handsome, elegant and outgoing guy, working his way through med school as a barista. He was smart and funny and - just like Blaine - he loved all the things that Kurt loved. They had so much in common… Kurt felt so lucky. They were together for almost a year.

The sex was just as plain as it had been with Blaine. Kurt still couldn't feel particularly sexy or interesting in bed, but his second boyfriend didn't seem to mind. Christian never complained that he was some kind of cold fish, so Kurt felt better about himself.

That was, of course, until the day Kurt found several explicit texts on Christian's BlackBerry from different guys he was sleeping with. And Kurt wasn't even checking on his boyfriend's phone; Kurt never mistrusted him. But they had had a fight that morning and Kurt had texted him something he instantly regretted, so he went to the café where Christian worked and apologized for their fight. Then, while Christian wasn't paying attention, Kurt took his boyfriend's phone to delete the text he had sent earlier.

Kurt smiled with relief when he found his own text unread. His smile faded quickly though when he saw the next text, saying something like 'Can't wait to feel your cock again, and it's only been a day without it'.

Kurt instantly thought he had a rival but he was wrong; there was no lover. Christian just had a hell of a lot of random one-night nightstands.

Francis was just the same as Blaine and Christian, but with an extra cold heart, since Francis never once visited him while he was in the hospital, even though they'd been together six months. By way of excuse, Francis said he was afraid of catching something from him. After such extreme neglect, Kurt wasn't even surprised when he got discharged and learned that Francis was cheating on him with the slutty hair-dresser from the photography department at Prada. And he was more numb than hurt when he found himself without a job, because Francis had taken advantage of Kurt's long absence to maneuver himself into the permanent position at the fashion house that Kurt would surely otherwise have gotten.

But Kurt had more urgent things to worry about than being dumped for the third time in the very same way. He had to find a new place to live, a new job (which turned out to be two jobs), and figure out how to pay an enormous medical bill.

His love life ended there. Kurt hadn't even dated after Francis.

It was impossible for Kurt not to think that there was clearly something wrong with him. Well, not entirely. Just the sex part, because all his boyfriends seemed to genuinely like him otherwise. When they weren't in bed, Blaine, Christian and Francis each had a great time being with him. So okay, Kurt wasn't particularly alluring or adventurous in bed. But isn't a bad sex life something that a couple should work out together? Instead, all his ex-boyfriends seemed to agree that Kurt was a hopeless case, convincing him the sex wasn't important while they fulfilled all their needs with other, more exciting men.

Sex was a curse. The ironic thing was that Kurt didn't even enjoy it that much. Jerking off got him the same results without all the complications. So Kurt stopped analyzing it and focused on dealing with his other problems.

But now Kurt found himself thinking about sex for the first time since being dumped by his last boyfriend over two years earlier.

_What the hell have I done?_

All the things Kurt thought he would never do in his life, he did them all in once. Spontaneous sex, sex in a public place, sex against a wall, rough sex, sex with a virtual stranger… he behaved like the sluttiest French whore and he can hardly stand the shame he feels.

There are bruises in his hips and hickeys on his neck. So Kurt hates himself even more because he has to spend money he doesn't have on make-up to conceal the evidence of his inexplicable depravity, even though he'd like to forget about it and pretend he never acted like such a needy slut. The next night at the VIP, he's tense the entire time, not knowing if Dave Karofsky will show up again. Maybe he would; maybe he'd ask for Kurt, expecting sex again, and Kurt doesn't want to deal with such an embarrassing situation. Kurt's mind wouldn't be clouded by whatever it was that clouded his judgment the night before, and Kurt would refuse.

But Dave doesn't show up and Kurt returns to his apartment on Sunday morning relieved.

By Tuesday, Kurt manages to accept his aberrant slutty behavior and stops beating himself up, since he can't change the past. His thoughts move from himself to a certain Dave Karofsky. Every time Kurt thinks about him, he feels a mix of resentment and inexplicable longing.

In all honesty, Kurt stopped being mad at Dave years ago. Even back in high school, alongside despising him, Kurt also pitied him. Sure, the jock scared, tormented and upset him, but Kurt couldn't hate Karofsky _per se_. After that disturbing kiss in the locker room, it was obvious that Karofsky was deeply troubled by his own sexuality. Eventually, after not seeing each other for years, Karofsky became just a blurry bad memory in Kurt's life.

Now when he thinks about Dave, Kurt keeps on calling him exactly that: _Dave_. It feels foreign but natural at the same time, and Kurt wonders why Dave decided that night to call him 'Kurt' for the first time ever. Back in high school, Kurt even wondered if the jock knew his given name, since he was always 'Hummel' or 'Fancy' or those other horrible nick names that Dave used to make fun of him. After last Saturday, one thing is for sure - regardless of whether Karofsky is 'out' or still in the closet, he's at least accepted being gay enough to have sex with men.

Dave's image from Saturday night is inked in his cornea. He looked just like he did when they were in high school and Kurt feels self-conscious when he thinks about that. Kurt didn't have the chance to take a close look, since they were face to face for only a couple of seconds and then… well, Kurt spent most of their time together with Dave behind him… but he couldn't help noticing the other guy hadn't aged a bit.

In contrast, Kurt feels old. He thinks it's not fair. The last time they'd seen each other years ago, Kurt was still a fashionista with flawless skin and perfect hair. Dave was wearing that ugly letterman jacket with bad jeans and ugly sneakers, but Kurt surely must have had on an outfit taken from a designer runway. Yet last Saturday Dave looked just fine in tasteful casual clothes, while Kurt was wearing cheap tight pants, a very fitted slutty tee, and tight high stripper boots. Kurt always loved high boots, but the ones he uses for work were found in a second handed clothing store and he swears they belonged to some hooker; and just like the rest of his clothes, everything was worn out.

They didn't have time to catch up, for obvious reasons, and Kurt blushes for the hundredth time in the last three days. But anyway, Dave is not a person that Kurt would invite to chat over a cup of coffee about what they've been up to during the last five years. Karofsky was not a friend. And it's not like he's particularly curious about what Karofsky has been doing with his life.

Dave Karofsky found out that he's a stripper. That's pretty terrible, but Kurt believes that meeting any of his former Glee friends would have been beyond humiliating. It would have been much worse running into someone like Rachel Berry, Blaine Anderson or Mercedes Jones and having to explain to _them_ how his life went to hell.

Wednesday arrives, and for some reason Kurt wakes up with throbbing morning wood, which is odd since he wasn't even having a sex dream. But he lazily jerks off in bed and afterward, as he lays there trying to regain enough strength get up and shower, he realizes it's the first time in a long time that he's had two orgasms in less than a week.

Still laying in bed, Kurt's mind is suddenly filled once again with memories of his encounter with Dave, but this time Kurt thinks solely about the sex itself. He doesn't think about why he acted like a slut, or why he had sex in a public place, or why he let Dave fuck him like that. Kurt instead thinks about Dave's mouth in his neck, and how weird it was that Dave's rough hands felt so good as their roamed his body.

Kurt is not sure if it was because of the lack of sex in his life that Dave fucking him hard and rough felt so great, but Lord, it really did feel great. The entire time in that booth, Dave kept him hard and turned on by doing things with him that Kurt has never done before.

Kurt wouldn't have allowed one of his ex-boyfriends to push him against a wall and fuck him hard and fast, like they were some desperate animals needing to mate. But last Saturday, he couldn't stop himself.

Everything Dave did to him felt –physically- right. Rationally, it was not acceptable for Kurt, but his body loved every one of Dave's rough attentions. It's like once he shut his brain off, he discovered a whole new side of sex that he didn't know before - sex in its most primal form, a form that was pure pleasure.

Kurt could never reach that point with his ex-boyfriends. With each of them, Kurt was constantly thinking while having sex - if he looked hot enough, if he was doing it right, if he was pleasing his partner, etc. And his ex-boyfriends were never rough with him; they always understood that to him, sex was part of romance, a way to connect on a deeper level with the ones he loved. Yet his boyfriends never really loved him, since they decided to cheat on him, so that idea is quite absurd. And what would his ex-boyfriends have thought about him if he acted like a whore? Probably that he was one.

Kurt blinks at that thought. Maybe if he had acted more like a slut, they wouldn't have cheated on him with sluts.

Kurt lifts his tee, uncovering his hipbones, and finds the bruises that Dave left printed on his skin. His skin always bruised easily, and these are almost fading, luckily. Kurt did his best to ignore them during the past few days, but now Kurt's fingers rest over the dark spots on his skin, recalling Dave's hands gripping his hips tightly, and he starts growing hard _again._

He ignores his modesty and his good judgment and lets himself get turned on by the memories of his encounter with Dave.

Kurt comes hard for the second time that morning, and if coming twice within five days was something Kurt hasn't experienced in years, coming three times is huge! He forces himself not to feel guilty about jerking off to the memory of a fuck he regrets and is ashamed of; Kurt decides he has a right to feel good, at least for five minutes, so he lingers in his post orgasm bliss, relaxed and content.

When you are poor, you don't get trips around the world, fancy cars and designer clothes… you don't get much stuff to enjoy. When you are poor, you have to take pleasure in what you _can_ get. Food, for example. Kurt can't pay for gourmet meals or organic produce; sometimes he can't even buy enough food, like during winter when he has to skip days at work because he's sick and the money grows short. So Kurt's learned to love the pleasure that junk food provides, because junk food is something he can afford once in a while.

Then sex. Well, not sex, but coming. Kurt always found sex way too complicated to enjoy. Coming, though, is relaxing and pleasing and he can do it by himself. Coming is cost-free.

He should jerk off more often.

Kurt's nervous to be back at the VIP Club on Thursday, but Dave doesn't show up. Kurt wonders if Dave was there on any of the previous nights –the nights that Kurt has off - looking for him. It's a stupid thought; why would Dave want to see him again? They weren't friends before, and everything that happened that night screamed random sex. Kurt's not an expert, but he assumes that the whole point of having sex with strangers is precisely that, to be _strangers_ having sex. Random sex is not a jumping off point for getting to know someone.

Dave doesn't appear at the club on Friday night either, and Kurt finally stops being on edge. He decides to forget all about what went down in that dirty booth.

On Saturday Kurt calls his father and, as usual, his dad talks about all the things he did that week, what Carole has been up to, and what she cooked last night. Even if his dad is not telling him anything new or exciting, Kurt's heart aches in longing. At some other time, Kurt might consider his father's talk boring, but right now he doesn't. Kurt holds his old iPhone tight, missing his family terribly. He tries not to think too much about how desperately he wants to go back to Lima; he tries to ignore how much he'd like to stay with his family forever, maybe even move back in with his parents so he can see them every day, even for just a little while, to compensate for all the time they've been apart. Or about how he'd give anything to be able to settle down in the town he used to hate and live a quiet life working at his father's garage.

If he thinks too much about all the things he wants but can't have, Kurt wouldn't be able to get up in the morning and he has too many debts to pay to stay at home moping. But sometimes it seems harder to ignore his longing than other times. This Saturday, Kurt is so worn out he can't even muster the strength to lie about the supposed 'busy being successful' week he had. So he just stays quiet, letting his father do most of the talking, afraid that if he opens his mouth a sob will come out.

The pressure in his chest remains the entire day; Kurt misses his family too much. His home town, his house and … maybe not his old friends in particular, since he hasn't heard a word from any of them in several years, but he misses having friends in general. Being alone and all by himself seems suddenly harder to bear today than any other day.

He's sitting behind the register halfway through his shift at Met Food when the image of Dave returns to his mind. His lips curve upwards just slightly and the pressure inside his chest eases at the same time that his pulse quickens. The warm, weird feeling he had when he saw Dave for the first time in The VIP is back.

A familiar face. In spite of everything, Dave was a familiar face, and it was soothing, even comforting on some strange level.

Kurt gets swept up in his thoughts, not needing to concentrate in his job since it's so repetitive he basically works on autopilot.

He can't deny anymore that seeing Dave felt good. Just seeing him; Kurt wasn't expecting to have sex with him, but for a half-a-second, amid the huge mix of feelings that assaulted Kurt, he felt good.

It's almost pathetic. How lonely he must feel to be almost happy about meeting Dave Karofsky, of all people? Kurt usually never considers how lonely he feels, because he's alone and that's the way it is. To complain would be like complaining because his hair is dark or because the sky is blue.

But having met Dave, it's like now Kurt feels the weight of his solitude and it's devastating. Obviously, he's so miserable that seeing someone he used to despise was nice.

He thinks about Dave the rest of the day and that night when he's at The VIP, for the first time since last Saturday night, Kurt looks around for Dave, not to avoid him but hoping to see him again. Maybe he wouldn't even approach him; Kurt would be fine if he could at least see Dave's familiar face once more. The shitty past he had with Dave doesn't matter; Kurt has a pretty shitty present and all the things that happened between him and his former bully all those years ago seem meaningless now. Kurt _wishes_ his troubles were having a closet case bully pushing him around, instead of fearing to fall ill or being unable to pay his bills.

Kurt's really sick of being alone. He hadn't realized that until now, when he thinks about Dave. All he has now in his life are circumstantial people from two jobs he wishes he didn't have. Sure, Kurt is cordial towards them, but they are not friends. Neither are his neighbors.

Kurt doesn't talk with any of them about his life, his dreams and his worries, and neither do these people talk about these subjects with him. All they know about him is his name, that he's quite broke and that he gets sick often. He just wants to be with someone; not a partner or anything romantic. Kurt is not tired of being single; he's just tired of being alone. Just to have someone there, to talk with or to keep company or simply to be there; that's what Kurt wants.

Dave doesn't show up on Saturday, either, and Kurt returns to his place disappointed. In the solitude of his apartment, a wave of sadness assaults him and he cries until he can't breathe, having to use his inhaler to expand his lungs. It's not like he wanted to see Dave that badly, of course. It's just he wishes he hadn't met Dave a week before, so he wouldn't be reminded of how lonely he is and how much he wants to have a better life. A life like the one he used to have before coming to New York.

Kurt has more trouble than usual breathing properly during his sleep, and wakes up on Sunday afternoon grumpy and annoyed. He blames it on the distressed state in which he fell asleep, and decides to stop moping around.

His neighbor Chantal offers him some left-over casserole, and Kurt gladly accepts. Home-cooked food is his new organic, and Chantal is an incredibly good cook. His full stomach puts him in a better mood, and every time thoughts of Lima or his parents or Dave pop into his head, Kurt quickly dismisses them.

Sunday night in The VIP is exhausting, but Kurt doesn't work the following night and that helps him get through his shift. He performs and gives a handful of lap-dances, so when the night ends, he has more money in his pocket and that makes him feel a little better. He has to work in Met Food in the morning, of course, but he looks forward to his Monday night off and the chance to take a break from sleazy guys patting his ass, at least for a couple of days.

Dave doesn't show up that night either, so when Kurt is in the staff room getting ready to go back home, he figures Dave is not coming back and he tells himself that's a good thing. Now these thoughts about Dave and his life in Lima will stop haunting him, at least for a while.

* * *

><p>The morning is a bit chilly, but Dave is too warm inside his car so he turns the heating off. He's nervous. Lord, he's so nervous, but he can't stand himself anymore.<p>

He thought that having sex with Kurt would provide some sort of closure for him. It made sense that night, right before he had Kurt almost handed to him on a silver platter. But the reality is that he didn't really have time to think about what he was getting himself into when the bartender of The VIP offered him 'some fun' with Kurt.

Everything happened too fast; he had way too many things going on inside his head and obviously he made the wrong decision.

Before that night, Dave hardly ever thought about Kurt. Sure, he thought about Kurt once in a while, but not in a romantic or sexual way. His occasionally wet dreams are an entirely different thing; those are the result of feelings left over from his former crush on the boy. And okay, Kurt always comes to mind when he's failing on his diet. So what if he used to look at himself in the mirror, thinking "No reason why he didn't want you." That thought was and is completely reasonable, and it didn't imply that he wanted to be with Kurt. In fact, that thought helped him get over Kurt back then and stop wondering how life would be if he could be with Kurt, since that was never going to happen. After all, he was the complete opposite of that preppy boy Kurt dated, and that's what Kurt wanted in a guy. When he was a teenager, Kurt's presence worsened all his insecurities. Dave hated Kurt for that, even if it wasn't Kurt's fault that he was such a closet case, so fat, so ugly and so dumb.

Dave accepted that and got over Kurt long ago. Way too long ago to find himself years later thinking about the guy again. Now things have changed; Dave has left his parents and his home town, he's an independent young man. He has a well paying job, a small but nice apartment that belongs to him, money in his pocket and most of all, he's free to do whatever he wants. If he wants to take a guy to his place, if he wants to buy something, if he wants to move or change jobs, he doesn't have to ask anyone's permission. He's aware that he has some shitty self-esteem issues, but after all, he _is_ fat, and he _does_ sweat too much, and he's _not_ super attractive, so he thinks he has the right to feel bad about that every now and then.

Aside from that, Dave's life was going pretty smoothly. Boring and lonely, but smoothly. Yet, it took one stupid second to make the wrong decision and turn everything upside down.

Having Kurt was somehow supposed to help Dave forget about him once and for all. Being able to taste what he had wanted for so long should have made it easier for Dave to put a real end to his stupid school crush. That didn't happen, though. Instead, he got a small taste Kurt and far from bringing him closure, it's only made Dave want more.

It just wasn't enough. And it was all wrong. It wasn't meant to happen that way. He had dreamed and longed and hoped for Kurt for years when he was younger, and never did he imagine that the two of them being together would involve fucking Kurt against the wall of a dirty fucking booth after paying seventy bucks to do it.

It shouldn't matter, since it's not like they were going to meet again at some point of their lives and somehow Dave was going to win Kurt over, making him fall in love with him.

But even if that was never going to happen, it didn't mean that Dave wanted _this_ for himself or for Kurt.

The truth is that he's fucking clueless about almost everything. It's been a week and Dave can't wrap his brain around the fact that someone like Kurt became a hooker. The whole universe must be fucked up if God, life, fate or whatever it was allowed that to happen. It's obvious that Kurt is not the person he used to be in high school, when Dave was head over heels for the boy. Back then, Kurt was everything that Dave wanted, everything that Dave wanted to be, and everything that Dave was not. Dave is pretty sure he fell out love with Kurt years ago. He's almost positive that he didn't fall in love with Kurt all over again last week, since Kurt now is obviously different from the Kurt Dave knew when they were teens. Dave doesn't know this Kurt.

You just don't fall for a person you don't know.

But to his heart, none of that makes any difference.

This is for sure not the Kurt he used to be in love with, but it's Kurt nonetheless and Kurt was and always has been his weakest spot. Loving or not loving him, Dave aches for Kurt again, and that night that he could taste him it wasn't enough. Dave wants more, even if he knows he shouldn't. The wanting, the constant nervousness, the warmth in his chest along with the ache of his stomach are all back again and Dave can hardly deal with it.

Dave wants Kurt for longer than ten minutes. Dave wants Kurt in his house, in his bed, willingly and not for money. Dave wants to spend all the time he can with Kurt, just staring at him or listening to him, and Dave wants to know this Kurt whose life is so different from the one he thought Kurt was destined to have…

And he shouldn't. Kurt is a hooker now, and who falls in love with a hooker? This is probably for the best. Deep down inside, Dave knows he should stay away from him, because what if Kurt turns out to be as incredible as he used to be? It took Dave a long time to get over Kurt; if he gets to know Kurt now and finds out that, in spite of his obviously bad present, Kurt is as perfect and flawless as he used to be, Dave will be once again be in deep shit, because just like before, Kurt will be perfect and Dave won't be good enough for him. Yet Kurt is now within his reach, and Dave finds himself in the same dilemma he found himself in a week before. Dave is disgusted by the knowledge that anyone can have Kurt for just seventy bucks, but that also means Dave could have Kurt again, as many times as he's willing to pay for. Kurt is right there to be taken and it's just too tempting, Dave can't help wanting Kurt for himself. That night wasn't enough, it hasn't brought closure. It was like opening the freaking Pandora's box. It's not just the sex, even if memories of the rushed sex they had have been haunting Dave's mind the entire week. It was wrong and dirty, but at the same time it was one of the hottest things Dave has ever experienced. He still can't believe how tight Kurt was, probably the tightest guy Dave has ever fucked, and he feels like shit knowing he hurt Kurt at first. But how the fuck was he was supposed to know that Kurt was going to be painfully tight? He's a hooker. Doesn't he get like lots of clients? Someone as hot as Kurt would, right?

Dave shivers at that thought. He hates thinking that Kurt has to fuck guys for a living, and it pains him that he became one of those guys.

But Dave needed to be _something_ to Kurt, and it was either client or nothing. He made Kurt come, though, and that makes him feel slightly better. He's sure that if Kurt has to fuck who knows how many times every night, he doesn't really get any pleasure from that. Dave's never been with a hooker, and he has never talked with people who have, either, but he assumes that people who pay for sex don't bother much about pleasuring the person they are paying to pleasure _them_.

He's not sure about how much money hookers charge for their services, but Dave believes that seventy bucks is almost insulting. As insulting as the fact that Kurt has to make money that way in the first place. That must be what's going on, right? If Kurt is prostituting himself, he must be desperate for money. So if Dave paid more, whatever Kurt asked, could Dave get more of Kurt's time? It's not such a far out idea; Dave is not expecting Kurt to pretend to love him, or even like him, just because Dave pays. He only wants one night, a real night with Kurt in his place, in a real bed. In a place with lights so Dave can admire every inch of Kurt's body, in a place where the music is not deafening so he can listen to Kurt's soft voice.

Kurt might prefer that, too. Even though Dave would still be just a client, Kurt might prefer to… _work_ some place besides that dirty and depressing club, in that ugly wooden booth. Dave has a nice apartment and a comfortable bed and he'd treat Kurt like royalty, the way he deserves to be treated.

So Dave finds himself again acting like a creeper. He's not staking Kurt _per se_. He's just sitting in his parked car, watching people leaving the VIP Club place through his rear view mirror.

Dave didn't feel comfortable approaching Kurt in The VIP, so he figured he could catch him while leaving the place. It is a _little_ stalkerish, Dave has to admit, but it's not like he has a lot of ways to get in touch with Kurt.

Dave has been waiting outside The VIP for the last three hours – he didn't know at what time the place closed - and now that it's almost seven in the morning, he's worried Kurt might have left early, or not even worked last night at all. Dave still waits, though. He has to be in the office at nine, so he dressed in his suit, in case he had to go straight to work after – maybe - getting to talk with Kurt.

But the club shut its doors at six, all the customers are long gone and now the club is closed. He grows anxious when he spots the doors opening, and even more when he sees a few guys leaving the place.

He orders to himself to calm the fuck down. Kurt must not have worked last night, or maybe he left before Dave arrived. Dave could be almost hyperventilating for nothing.

But then, Dave sees him.

Kurt exits The VIP, along with two other guys. Dave watches in his rear view mirror as Kurt says goodbye to the other guys. Dave grows even more nervous when he realizes Kurt has turned around and is now walking, all by himself, in the same direction where Dave's car is parked.

It's the perfect moment. Kurt is there, alone, and Dave just has to approach him. But Dave can hardly move; his eyes are fixed in Kurt's image in his rear view mirror and Kurt looks… so different. Dave still remembers how Kurt strutted around McKinley's hallways in his expensive and flashy clothes with his head held high, like he was superior to everyone… Now Kurt is just a regular guy in jeans and a blue jacket, carrying a backpack. He's hugging himself, and he has his neck buried between his shoulders like he's cold.

It's a big deal. It could seem stupid or meaningless to other people, but this change in Kurt's walk... it's painful for Dave to watch. He has no clue about what happened to Kurt, but the boy who used to glide through the world full of confidence and superiority, making everyone turn around to watch him, now seems vulnerable and fragile, walking with his chin almost pressed against his chest, like he's trying to pass unnoticed.

Kurt passes by Dave's car and Dave blinks, trying to step out of his trance. It's now or never.

"Wait! Kurt!"

* * *

><p>Kurt turns around when he hears someone call his name, and his eyes go wide in surprise when he sees none other than Dave Karofsky approaching him. Kurt doesn't know what to say or do, so he stays still, trying to figure this out. It was just yesterday that he resolved that Dave Karofsky disappearing from his life was something good, but now the man is standing next to him and Kurt feels like he can't breathe, and it's not because of his breathing issues.<p>

Just in case, Kurt sneaks his hand inside his pocket, holding his inhaler.

Dave is there, but this time he's wearing a nice fitting and sober suit. It makes him look classier and more grown up, but if Dave's wearing an office suit, clearly he's doing better than himself. Even if he can't afford good clothes, Kurt can tell that Dave's suit is not cheap at all.

Kurt tries not to be bitter. Even the guy who sells hot dogs on the street corner across from the club is doing better than himself. Neither that guy nor Dave have to undress in public for a living.

Still, Kurt's heart grows warm at the familiarity of his presence.

"Hey," Kurt says sheepishly, because Dave is right there and it reminds him of what they did last weekend. Kurt is still ashamed of himself.

Dave takes a deep breath. "Hey. Sorry if I'm bothering you," he says, sounding troubled.

Kurt shrugs. "I was just heading home."

He really doesn't have much to say. Also, Dave is the one who came looking for him at seven in the morning on a Monday, so Kurt guesses that before figuring out how to act in front of Dave, he should find out why Dave is here. It's nice to see him though, and he wonders if there's any way to be able to do this, pretend that they didn't have sex. Would Dave let that pass? Kurt might like to see him again, under different circumstances. Kurt would like to hang out with someone. Once again, Dave doesn't look threatening. In addition, Dave already knows the dark part of Kurt's life, so not having to hide himself from someone that used to know him, it makes Kurt feel much lighter. The burden is gone, at least between the two of them.

"I... I-" Dave sighs frustrated, like he's having trouble finding the words. "Listen, I just… wanted to make you an offer."

Kurt frowns. "An offer?"

Dave nods. "I was wondering if you'd spend the whole night with me, at my place."

Kurt blinks, frozen on the spot. What did he just say? Kurt's out of words. His mouth moves silently at first, not being able to let out a sound, until he finally speaks. "I'm sorry?"

"I'll pay you more than what you get in here for a customer. Twice or three times, or anything you want," Dave hurries to say, leaving Kurt stupefied.

"What?"

But then, Kurt's eyes open widely.

_Oh, Lord, no._

His blood turns cold when realization hits and a billion thoughts cross Kurt's mind in less than a second. Dave thinks he's a hooker? Kurt blushes furiously and remains unable to say a word. Dave actually thinks he's a hooker? It's humiliating! Kurt doesn't know what's worse, Dave maybe believing he's a slut or Dave believing he's a freaking prostitute!

And God, even Kurt gets it! Why would Dave think differently? He paid for a private lap dance and they ended up having sex. Maybe now he thinks 'dancer' is code for 'prostitute' and 'private lap dance' is code for 'sex with the dancer/prostitute in a booth'.

Jesus Christ, Dave thinks guys have sex with him after paying seventy bucks? Kurt would be the cheapest whore! How bizarre is the fact that Kurt is probably the most celibate guy in New York City and Dave thinks he's a hooker?

"I'm… I-" Kurt mumbles, still at a loss for words.

"We'll be more comfortable," Dave offers, obviously trying to sell this deal to him. "The other night was… awkward, at least for me it was. I guess it's something normal for you," he says, sounding at little upset and Kurt only stares at him, trying to figure out if he should be offended or… something.

"I'm sorry," Kurt tells him. "I'm not really-"

"Just one night," Dave cuts him off. "Anytime you can."

Kurt gives Dave a long stare. He wanted to see Dave again; he also hoped they could avoid the sex thing. Kurt longs to be with someone, even more someone familiar to him. In spite of their history together, in spite of the one night stand, Dave seems different and maybe it wasn't so bad if they saw each other again.

And now, Dave wants him _that way_ again, which is ridiculous. Kurt doesn't know what to do and he knows he has to say something.

He's very much trapped.

Because if Kurt corrects Dave, what could Kurt say? 'Sorry, I'm not a hooker for real. That was just me being a slut. I don't blame you for not being able to tell the difference.'

Kurt swallows hard.

His pride is already too wounded. Kurt has to tell Dave that he's not a hooker, he's aware of that. But having to say aloud something that shames him so badly, it bothers Kurt. He doesn't want to let Dave know that he willingly threw himself into his arms the first chance he got, letting him fuck him against a wall.

Sure, Dave doesn't seem to be the same man he used to, but it's still Dave Karofsky, his former bully and he's almost a stranger to him. Kurt doesn't want Dave to think that he has some kind of power over him. Even if Kurt did fall under some sort of spell that night, for some reason that is beyond his comprehension.

The positive thing about Dave's false impression – if there's anything positive about it - is that Kurt can wash his hands of any personal responsibility. After all, if he's supposedly a hooker, he had sex with Dave because he had to and not because he wanted to.

"Kurt?"

Kurt blinks. He still hasn't said anything and he still doesn't know what to say. "I'm sorry," he mumbles. "This is just a bit… _odd._"

'Odd' does not even begin to describe this situation, but Kurt is not feeling very eloquent right now.

Dave presses his lips together, looking almost disappointed. "I'm sorry. This is probably not a regular thing to you."

"At all," Kurt mutters, and he suddenly starts feeling a pressure on his chest that grows more unbearable with every second that passes.

This is a huge mess, and Kurt is not fixing it. Now Dave is standing just a few feet in front to him, in a nice fitting suit and with a disappointed face that actually makes Kurt feel terrible. Did Dave want so badly to see him? Well, no. Dave wanted to have sex with him again, which is not the same. But they are standing in front of each other, not saying a word, as if they are both trying to figure out how to escape this awkward moment that seems to dishearten the both of them for very different reasons.

Dave is right there, _Dave freaking Karofsky,_ and Kurt is so lonely that his mere presence makes him feel a little accompanied. He's so damn lonely that this proximity to someone who used to know him from his better days seems huge.

"I- I h-have," Kurt stutters, not realizing that he's actually speaking and catching Dave's attention. "I work most nights in here, except Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

His words are out before he can even think about what he's saying. But then the rest happens in a blur, Kurt being way too dumbstruck about what he just did.

Kurt gives Dave his phone number and Dave saves it in his flashy BlackBerry. Kurt doesn't take his iPhone out of his pocket. The screen is cracked in half, but it still works and Kurt can't afford a new phone, and in the end it's just a phone. Still, he doesn't want Dave to see what bad shape it's in, or learn anything more about his shitty life. He tells Dave he forgot his phone at his place.

Dave assures him that he'll call to 'arrange something' and Kurt humors him, assuring himself that he won't answer such a call but deep inside knowing that he will.

They say goodbye to each other and Kurt makes his way to the bus stop. He's shocked, upset, and mad at himself. Kurt wants to cry, but he doesn't; he keeps on walking.

It's mostly his fault, not to say all of it. He could have stopped Dave when he made his first move at The VIP; God knows Kurt never lets anyone get too friendly with him, and anyone who even tries gets his ass kicked by The VIP's bouncer. Kurt didn't stop Dave though. In fact, Kurt went with it very willingly and excitedly.

There's something about Dave that clearly clouds Kurt's judgment. Is he really so needy for affection that he lets his former bully approach him like this? Christ, Kurt didn't even give Dave a fake number!

Kurt holds his head high as he tries to grow some backbone. So what? Maybe he does want to spend time with another human being, just for a change. He's been by his own for the last two years, so yes, maybe he's freaking tired of being alone and spending time with Dave doesn't sound like such a terrible idea.

He knows he's playing it down, but he needs to hold on to some excuse, otherwise he'll fall to pieces for being so pathetic. The truth is that if Kurt really takes Dave's call and they arrange to meet, Kurt will be spending the night at Dave's place, having sex with him and _getting paid _for it, which is beyond humiliating. As humiliating as letting someone who used to torment you think that you're a hooker, so you can spend time with that person.

He _is_ pathetic. It depresses him, because at the end of the day he can lie to Dave Karofsky and let him think whatever he wants, but Kurt can't lie to himself.

Kurt's bus arrives and he decides to stop thinking about it, even if he knows it will be hard. Once he gets a seat on the bus, he feels his broken phone vibrating in his pocket and Kurt jumps in his place. He carefully checks his phone, holding his breath as if this ruined piece of technology suddenly morphed into a bomb ready to explode.

It's just a text: 'This is Dave. Just wanted to give you my number. We'll be in touch.'

Kurt presses his lips together. He's about to reply to the message but then he remembers that his phone is supposedly at his place, so he doesn't. But he curses himself, realizing that he was about to text a simple 'Okay'. He wasn't even thinking about it; he wasn't even questioning this whole situation.

He's doing way too many things without thinking. Kurt feels like he's drifting, and Dave's presence in his life is the turning tide. For whatever reason, Dave leads the way and Kurt follows, and what's worse is that Dave is not even playing games with him. But still Kurt feels boneless and empty, floating in the air and Dave is the blowing wind taking Kurt to all the wrong places.

Kurt sighs, putting his phone back to his pocket. Whatever happens will happen, and Kurt will deal with it when it does. He's not sure which way the wind will blow. But Kurt never knows. If there's one thing that rules Kurt's life, it is uncertainty; he can't predict exactly how much money he'll make, or if he's going to have an asthma attack, or if he's going to be able to cancel his debts. He never knows how many customers he'll have each night, or if he'll fall ill again. He never knows what life is going to throw at him.

Kurt is up to Dave now. Maybe that's not something so bad. Life has knocked Kurt down plenty of times and this time for a change, when Kurt falls, he'll fall next to someone. There will be another body next to him when he hits the ground.

And that's more than the nothing he's had for the last couple of years.


	4. Chapter 3

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> Nc17.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Season One and Two.  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Rebeca!  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 17ooo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.  
><strong>AN:** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
><strong>AN2: **I'm sooo sorry for taking so long to update. I usually don't take so much time between updates since as a reader, I hate having to wait ridiculous times for the updates of the fics I like reading. I'll do my best not to fall behind so badly. But hey, this chapter is ridiculously long so I hope the wait was worth.

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><p><strong>Chapter 3<strong>

The last week and a half have had Dave on edge. Every time he thought 'I've never been so nervous in my life,' something new happened, showing him that indeed, he could go through a lot more stress than he thought possible.

Seeing Kurt again at that club got him way too nervous. Getting an offer to, and then having sex with him made it worse, even before meeting him again on the streets to offer to spend the night together. Dave didn't have the courage to call Kurt to arrange their meeting, but he texted him last night –the day after, Dave didn't want to look too desperate- after being anxious the entire day and feeling that his BlackBerry weighed several pounds, having Kurt's contact in it.

But Dave texted him, Kurt replied and he's coming tonight.

He's been a bunch of nerves ever since. For starters, he ruined his diet once again. He had spent days watching everything he ate so carefully, never eating more than he should. Yet, after he and Kurt arranged their meeting via text message, Dave -being the fat pig he is- ordered a huge amount of Thai food and ate more in two hours than he would normally eat in a week. He stopped of course, when his stomach started hurting after ingesting so much, then had to rush to the bathroom to throw up and get rid of his stomach ache, and the extra pounds that he was surely going to gain.

Still, he's uneasy. He woke up that morning anxious, knowing that Kurt was coming later in the night. He busied himself with work which helped, until his shift ended and the whole matter slapped him in the face once again.

He drove straight to his apartment, cursing to himself when he saw it was in perfect order, not even having chores to kill some time and distract himself with. Dave took a shower, took his medication and then tried to make himself as presentable as he could for Kurt, even though he was aware that no matter how clean he was, or how pretty his clothes were, he would still be something that Kurt wouldn't want if Dave wasn't paying him for it.

It's six pm and Dave is sitting on his couch, showered and dressed in casual clothes. This isn't a date per se; he would dress up for Kurt if they were going into a real first date, but this isn't, and he doesn't want to look like an idiot. Kurt would think he's the lamest guy on earth if he welcomed him to his place, wearing flashy clothes, and handing a freaking rose when he's paying to have sex with him.

In the solitude of his apartment, Dave forces himself to calm the fuck down. He already made a fool of himself when he approached Kurt on Monday on the streets. He still remembers that encounter; how he stuttered, how troubled he must have looked and how he practically begged Kurt to spend the night with him.

Dave doesn't want to look or feel weak in front of Kurt. He's got to be strong; he's been through this already. Kurt's not just a random guy in his life; he's a whole aspect of Dave's life, an aspect in which Dave fails. Dave knows he has to be careful with this whole thing, otherwise he'll end up hurt all over again, and he's suffered too much for Kurt already.

Dave also reminds to himself that Kurt is a hooker now, so Dave can use that to his advantage. If they meet, it's strictly 'for business' and not because Dave got Kurt to agree to date him. Dave doesn't have to court Kurt, or to win his love; Dave isn't in love with Kurt anymore anyways, and even if he was, Kurt wouldn't want Dave to court him either.

Kurt is going to be there because he has to, not because he wants to. Dave has to keep that in mind. After all, he will be paying for it, and even if that pains him, he has to admit that somehow, Kurt's current job helps to get rid of the weight on his shoulders. Kurt surely doesn't like his clients, and Dave will only be one of the many. Dave doesn't have to win Kurt's appreciation or his liking, so he should stop worrying about trying to get something he wouldn't be able to achieve anyway.

He doesn't have to put any effort to charming Kurt, so he tells himself over and over to calm the fuck down, and to keep his shit together. He tells himself to keep it cool and not show any weakness. This is Kurt, so Dave has to put some distance between him in his head, or he'll grow attached, or worse, let himself daydream about a lot of bullshit that will never happen. He doesn't want to end up crushed and depressed over Kurt again.

He promises not to be an asshole to Kurt though. Dave still feels guilty for all the shit Kurt had to go through because of him; but he's not that guy anymore. He doesn't know anything about Kurt's life, but he's a hooker who has to fuck guys for a living so Dave's assuming Kurt is in a weak position. Dave is aware that his life is a mess, and that he's far from being a strong guy; yet, Dave is probably doing better than Kurt and he's also the one who's paying. Just like in high school, Kurt is in a weaker spot while Dave is in a position of power. Back then, it was because his social status and his body size that made it easy for Dave to shove him around. Now it's because Kurt's income comes –partly, since it's not like he's the only customer that Kurt has- from Dave's pocket.

Dave is obviously in a better place than Kurt, and he won't abuse it.

Also, Dave wants Kurt to at least be somewhat comfortable, or as comfortable as a hooker can be with his client. He feels silly thinking about it, being sure that guys who pay for sex are only concerned about themselves, only using and even degrading the person they are with. Dave has never been disgusted by hookers; he's always felt quite sorry for them. He can't even imagine what must be like to have to have sex with random guys for money. The fact that Kurt is a hooker Dave finds both unbelievable, and devastating.

Dave doesn't expect Kurt to like him, and he promises himself that he won't try to make Kurt like him, as he doesn't want to raise his own expectations. Still, he doesn't want to be something bad for Kurt, since he's done that in the past, and since Kurt no doubt has to deal with enough bad people everyday.

There are too many lines in this matter that Dave has to manage not to cross. Kurt hasn't even arrived and Dave feels he's standing on thin ice already, but it's not surprising since this is Kurt after all. Yet things are more complicated than they were in high school, and for a moment he finds himself wishing for that simplicity.

Dave stares at his wall watch and it's only a quarter past seven. Kurt is supposed to arrive around nine and Dave knows this thing will be eating him until then.

He wonders if he should talk about all this with his therapist tomorrow. It's a bitch that he had to change his therapist when he left Boston. It took him years to be comfortable with his old therapist, to really talk about all the things that trouble him. Now it's like he has to start all over again, and it's not working that well. He hasn't told his new doctor about having met Kurt again. She has in fact, absolutely no knowledge about Kurt's existence in his life, and it's been three months since she became his therapist. She's more focused on his depression and eating habits, while right now Dave thinks they're the least of his troubles.

He sighs. He'll have to wait and see what happens and hope that things won't spiral out of his grasp. He feels like his spirit has been broken, then was glued poorly back together and is now resting on the very edge of a shaky table.

Dave can only hope that if he falls, he won't fall so hard.

He can only hope.

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><p>To say that Kurt has been freaking out for the past three days is underestimating things severely. Just like he predicted, he agreed to meet Dave. What's worse is that Kurt actually agreed to have sex with him in exchange for money.<p>

He agreed to be a hooker.

He has no clue about hookers and he has no clue about sex, so Kurt doesn't sleep that night, trying to figure out what the hell he's going to do with Dave.

It's his own fault since he agreed to Dave's proposition in the first place. Kurt has learned how to act like he's confident with himself; his job at The VIP requires him to seduce men, stripping down for them to make them want you for a lap dance. Kurt hates it, but he's learned to act like he loves it. After all, it's his job. He can't give a guy a lap dance with a disgusted face. The more of a charmer you are, the better the tip is.

So yes, Kurt has learned a lot about acting like he's someone he's not: a sexy, confident maneater. But he's was just a huge tease, since it never goes further than the flirting and a bit of –not welcomed- touching. None of the customers get to take him to their beds, to find out that Kurt is just one big bluff.

The truth is that Kurt has never felt sexy for real. At The VIP it's all about attitude, and Kurt fakes that attitude well, but Dave is not a client at The VIP. Kurt will have to sleep with Dave, and Kurt's act doesn't go further than the teasing, since he doesn't have anything more than teasing.

No matter how many guys touch his ass at work, or how many of them applaud his performances, none of that makes Kurt feel like he's someone sexy. Kurt's self-esteem is pretty low after being cheated on by his boyfriends, but it wasn't that the only reason why he stopped dating. Sure, he had more urgent business to take care of than getting a new boyfriend, but still… who could want to be with him? He never considered himself as someone ugly in the past, but now he's aware that life has worn him out. He's a mess. He's poor, his clothes are ugly, he gets sick too often, and he strips for a living. Who would ever want to have a boyfriend who's a stripper and lap-dancer? Some of the guys at work are in relationships, but Kurt doesn't see how that can work out.

And then, there's Dave Karofsky. As if Kurt's life wasn't complicated enough.

If Dave thought that all the workers of The VIP were hookers, Kurt doesn't get why he went for him. Probably because he bought the maneater act Kurt displayed on the stage. Maybe Dave has some kind of kink, or some repressed fantasy about him. After all, Dave did kiss him years ago; Kurt didn't think that it was because Dave was attracted to him, but maybe he was and now he feels there's some unfinished business with him. Or maybe Dave is just shoving in his face that he's supposedly a whore while Dave is an apparently successful… someone. Kurt doesn't know what Dave does for living but judging by his working clothes, he's in a better place than Kurt. Maybe Dave's still in the closet and now, after meeting once again with the only person who knew he's gay, Dave wants to have some satisfying sex, since he's not getting any of it for being supposedly straight.

And maybe it's none of that.

Dave looked somewhat vulnerable that Monday morning. It could have been something his mind made up, as Kurt was feeling pretty vulnerable as well. Kurt could have not wanted to be the only helpless one out of them both, and could have imagined that Dave wasn't feeling any better than he was about all this.

Asides the shame he feels about accepting money from Dave, someone who he almost hasn't seen in years, and the embarrassment that that money will be for sexual services, what makes Kurt worry the most is the act of sex itself.

Kurt will be supposedly a hooker. Not even 'supposedly' since he'll get money from someone after offering sex. Kurt has never gotten paid for sex, so technically he can't be classed as a prostitute yet, but that's what he will be becoming for Dave. He will receive money from Dave after letting him fuck him. That makes him a hooker.

And he sucks at sex.

All his ex-boyfriends have dumped him for being a lousy fuck, and now Dave wants to pay him for sex; life is clearly laughing at him. What the hell is Kurt going to do? If he's a hooker, he's supposed to be good at sex. He's supposed to blow Dave's mind, or be some incredible lay. If he was too self conscious and cold while having sex for pleasure, now he's going to be an ice box.

Having three boyfriends cheat on him with anonymous sluts killed the little self-esteem regarding sex that he had. In addition, Kurt's literally not the same guy he used to be. His face isn't the same, and neither are his hair, his skin, or his body overall, and he doesn't even have his flashy clothes to shield him.

He knows very little about hookers, so he watches Pretty Woman online and he's aware that it's ridiculous but he doesn't know what else to do. It's been ages since the last and only time he saw that movie, and doesn't expect to find some tips from this silly story but he still watches it. He likes Vivian's bright spirit, her confidence and her cheerful mood in spite of what she has to do for living.

Kurt wonders if he could act like her. After all, this is going to be a huge act. Or not so much. Kurt reminds to himself that he won't be acting like a hooker; he agreed to be one for real. Yet, Dave believes that's Kurt's life and it's not. Kurt doesn't have sex with men for a living; he'll be doing that just with Dave. It doesn't make it any better but it helps Kurt not feel so disgusted with himself.

And he thought he couldn't get any lower…

Time goes by fast and before he notices, it's Wednesday and he should be at Dave's in about three hours. Kurt's head is a mess of thoughts. He spends a long time staring at the poor collection of second hand clothes inside his closet, trying to figure out what to wear. He doesn't know how male hookers dress, and he certainly won't dress up like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. Should he wear skimpy clothes? Tight clothes? Flashy ones?

Kurt takes a quick shower and decides to go for jeans and black shirt. He doesn't have a large variety of clothes anyway, and maybe going somewhat normal is a safe thing to do. He also has to leave his apartment, and it's dark outside so wearing expensive or flash looking clothes in the middle of his neighborhood wouldn't be a wise thing to do.

It gets even worse when he leaves his apartment. Kurt's starting to realize that this is going to happen for real as he takes the bus in direction to Brooklyn, where Dave's apartment is located. His stomach starts cramping; this was a terrible idea and Kurt was aware of that. But being aware of that doesn't make it any better.

On his way to Dave's place, Kurt has plenty opportunities to cancel the meeting and go back home. Yet, he never texts Dave to tell him he's not going and he doesn't get out from the bus until he reaches his stop.

Dave lives in a nice neighborhood, Kurt notices. Probably not the most expensive part of Brooklyn, but definitely a nice neighborhood. All buildings have pretty looking parks, some of them even have doormen which makes Kurt envy Dave a little.

He swallows hard when he finally reaches number 446 Kingston Avenue. He stands in front of the tall building. There's a wide staircase with bushes to either side and while the building has a brick façade, the door gate is white with moldings. Once again, Kurt envies Dave. This looks like a really nice place to live.

Kurt takes a deep breath when he reaches the entry phone. He quickly finds the button for 11B, and this is the last chance to go back home and forget about all this. Kurt looks up at the huge building, and imagines Dave up there waiting for him.

Someone is waiting for him; somewhere else than work. He wants to cry when he realizes it's the first time in… he can't even remember how long, that he's left his place to go somewhere that's not work, the bank or the hospital. Dave is the first person that Kurt has visited ever since he got discharged from hospital two years ago.

Dave wants him for sex, and supposedly Kurt is there for the money. Kurt doesn't want the money though; he always needs money but he sure as hell doesn't want to get it this way. Yet, standing at the entrance of Dave's building, Kurt realizes how badly he wants to be in company of someone, even if that someone is Dave Karofsky and he only wants him there for sex.

It's better than nothing, and Kurt has had nothing for way too long.

With shaky fingers, Kurt presses the 11B button. He doesn't realize he's been holding his breath until he hears Dave's voice.

"Who is it?"

Kurt chokes with his own air. "Kurt. This is Kurt," he says, while his heart pounds inside his chest.

"Come on in," Dave replies, almost sounding like he's been caught off his guard. Was Dave not expecting him? Did Dave think that he wasn't going to come after all?

The door lets out a loud 'beep' and Kurt lets himself in. The inside of the building looks gorgeous, and Kurt thinks about the small apartment he used to have in Manhattan. His old apartment was marvelous. Incredibly small since rents in the best places in Manhattan are expensive, but still gorgeous.

He takes the elevator and he feels like a small child, and it depresses him. The elevator at his place has never worked, and small things like being in a freaking elevator that works seem to be something incredible.

He can't remember how it felt like to live in a nice and comfortable place. It's not like he's had a terrible life. On the opposite, he lived with lots of luxuries for the most part of his it; he enjoyed the benefits of having a great car, or great clothing, and even when he got to move away from his parents house, he got a great apartment.

Maybe he's gotten too used to living in misery.

Kurt does his best to get in his role. He watched Pretty Woman already, Kurt knows how to act like he's confident and sexy, so he should at least copy Julia Roberts' friendly and cheerful mood to at least conceal his inner freaking out. He's never been with a hooker, but he's almost positive that they don't look like they are some frightened kitty that got lost in the streets.

When he reaches the eleventh floor, Kurt takes a deep breath and holds his head high. He shakes his body just a little, trying to relax his tense muscles and it doesn't take him long to find 11B.

_'You've got this far already, you've already had sex with him so it's not like this is new to you.'_He says to himself, standing in front of Dave's door.

But he immediately frowns at that thought, as it's not completely true. He hasn't whored himself before, even the first and only time it was him, acting slutty. He also didn't have to act like a real hooker; after all, Dave was all over him as soon as they walked inside the booth.

Kurt realizes that if Dave is all over him as soon as he walks in, it could solve his problem. He won't have time to freak out; he'll have to go with it just like he went with it during their first time together. Yet, he'll be spending the night so unless Dave falls asleep right away after having sex, Kurt will have to act like a hooker at some point.

Kurt keeps on frowning, as everything hits him at this oh so convenient time, while he's standing right in front of Dave's door. What if Dave asks him to do something too weird in bed? What if Dave hires hookers all time, and he's used to some kind of premium sex and expects Kurt to deliver such a thing?

Kurt only knows how to act being sexy, so he can deliver while he strips. As for the rest, he's practically clueless. Well, not _clueless_; he's not a virgin after all. But life has taught him how much he sucks at sex.

Before he starts hyperventilating, Kurt knocks at the door before he can have any more second thoughts. He got this far, so be believes that hopefully, he'll get through the night.

Dave opens the door almost immediately, and Kurt flinches when he's finally standing in front of Dave, once again. There's an endless second of silence and Kurt reminds himself what he's here for, and who he's supposed to be. The image of Julia Roberts being all funny in Pretty Woman hits his brain and Kurt immediately shows a smile, trying to play his part.

"Hey," Kurt greets the other man, and for some reason, in spite of his nervousness, a wave of relief hits him as soon as his eyes lay upon Dave. It's not like Kurt was expecting him not to answer the door.

It's just good to see him again, even under these circumstances.

"I'm- eh, um," Dave stutters, frowning like he's mad at himself. "Hey," he says more firmly. "C'mon in."

Kurt nods, trying to remain calm. He steps inside and Dave leads him towards the living room. Kurt looks around, feeling instantly very envious. It's a very nice apartment. Modern and pretty. It's small, but bigger than the Kurt's old and current apartments. A short hallway leads them to the living room, which has a huge window and an incredible view of Brooklyn.

"Er… Want something to drink?" Dave says, making Kurt look at him.

"Sure," he replies, just not to be rude. He's not feeling very thirsty; in fact, he's so nervous that probably nothing could go through his throat.

Dave nods. "Make yourself comfortable."

Kurt sits on the nearest couch, taking his jacket off and leaving it by his side. The apartment is warm inside, and Kurt likes warm. The couch is large and cozy, in front of a huge TV; the walls are painted in a dark blue-grayish that Kurt happens to love, and it's a spacious open concept even if the walls are dark. He'd do anything to live in a place like this.

He watches Dave disappearing in the hallway, but then he's there again since there's a big window that allows him to see the kitchen.

They are both tense; Kurt can sense it. He reminds to himself once again, that he shouldn't act like he's some kind of drenched puppy abandoned during a storm. Still, the whole thing feels pretty foreign to him: he's sitting in someone else's home for starters. Dave's house is small, cozy and modern and it reminds Kurt of the times he hung out at his classmates' places while attending to Parsons. He didn't keep in touch with any of them. He's somewhere else than work, the hospital or the bank, and for the first time, he's not alone. Dave is around; Dave, a person he used to know and even if he's nervous, Kurt feels okay with his presence.

But he has to act his part.

"You have a nice place," Kurt points out, doing his best to sound casual. He has to break the ice somehow.

Dave returns from the kitchen holding two glass of what seems to be soda. He shows a small smile, sitting next to Kurt but leaving a considerable space between them. "Thanks. Diet Coke is fine for you?"

Kurt smiles back, and slowly he starts feeling a bit more in ease. "That's perfect for me. I would have never imagined you as a Diet Coke guy."

Dave lets out a nervous laugh. "I am I guess. Or at least, I try to," he says, and then silence falls upon them.

Kurt felt his chest constricting. This is not working; for some reason, he really wants to be here around Dave but it doesn't seem to work.

"This is awkward," Kurt lets out, showing a sad smile.

Dave snorts. "I'm sorry," he says, sounding disappointed.

"It's not your fault," Kurt hurries to say in a small voice. "I just… I'm not used to this."

Which is sort of true. He's not used to be at other people's places, or having a drink with someone else, or being in company of another person… or playing at being a hooker. Lord, he's not even used to having sex, it having been literally years since the last time he had any, besides Dave.

"Like, being at someone's place? I mean, doing…" Dave seems uncomfortable at saying this, Kurt notices. "Work outside that club, at someone's place?"

Kurt swallows hard, trying not to blush. "I guess," he lies again, even if it's not completely a lie.

Dave bites his lower lip, nodding. "I get that it could be weird. I mean, I'm just assuming, I don't really know how it is. I'm aware that I'm practically a stranger, and you're alone at some stranger's place, unlike in the club that you have people around just in case..."

Kurt frowns at Dave's words, not really getting the point.

"We have quite a shitty past I guess," Dave says, scratching the back of his neck. "But I just want you to know that you're not in any danger in here, and that under no circumstance I'd hurt you. If you're not feeling alright about this, you can leave whenever you feel you need to."

He hasn't thought about that. Dave has a point though. No one knows that he's here with Dave, so if during these past five or six years Dave became some serial killer, no one would ever find Kurt's body in case that Dave decided to murder him.

Jesus, how do hookers do this? Going to places with strangers… those guys could be psycho murderers!

But Kurt didn't consider their past much. Yes, Dave is his former bully but Kurt didn't think much about that. Dave's treatment didn't scar him for life, and even if he despised Dave in the past, it's the past. He can't manage fear Dave, or feel threatened by him.

He's not sure if he should feel threatened. Should he? Dave caused big troubles in Kurt's life during their teenagers years, but years went by and now Kurt has to deal with much major problems. His troubles while being a teenager seem meaningless now that he's a grown up.

And they are both grown ups. Kurt doubts that Dave has a slushie in his fridge, ready to throw into his face.

Kurt's nervous, indeed, but he's actually scared about how this is going to turn out. And in spite of his nervousness, plus the fact that Dave offered him a way out, Kurt doesn't want to go.

So Kurt reminds to himself for the thousandth why he's actually here, and all the things he knows how to do. He doesn't want Dave to see him in his weakest state; he doesn't want anyone to see him like that.

Kurt affects a smirk. "I'm not afraid of you, big boy," he says, disguising his voice into the flirty tone he has learned how to use long ago.

Dave chokes on air and Kurt grins boldly, half acting and half achieved. He knows how to do this, or at least this part of this. Dave fell instantly for this small, small act and Kurt realizes that maybe he has a chance not to make the fool of himself in this whole matter.

Kurt carefully places his glass in the coffee table, and takes Dave's out of his hand, doing exactly the same. Dave only stares at him, as Kurt licks his lips and carefully and sensually straddles Dave's lap.

He's done this before, thousands of times. This part is easy. Or it should be.

Dave stays very still, only watching him and Kurt can tell that he's catching Dave off his guard. With newly gained confidence, Kurt moves his hips creating some friction while holding Dave's gaze.

It's different from anything he has done at work though. For starters, there's no music on. The only thing that Kurt can hear is their breathing. Also, he's never had so much contact with his clients while giving a lap dance. This is not a chair, but a couch and Kurt can't keep his feet on the ground. Kurt is not dancing, and he's not keeping some good inches between him and the other guy either.

Kurt runs his hands over Dave's broad shoulders and strong arms, letting out a deep and pleased sigh when finally, Dave dares to touch him, placing his hands on Kurt's hips.

"I thought you were never going to touch me," Kurt whispers playfully to Dave's ear.

Words blurt out of Kurt's mouth, and he doesn't know where they come from. He seems to act in autopilot, and_ fuck _so far he's enjoying it. Kurt continues to move his hips, very slowly and sensually, grinding Dave's lap and he can feel the other man's erection growing. Kurt's getting turned on as well; he's getting hard for the man he's supposed to sleep by doing almost nothing. Dave's not getting hard because he's a hormonal teenager, or just because the prospect of having sex, or just because he has to since they have to have sex.

He's not like Kurt's ex-boyfriends.

Kurt licks his lips, meeting Dave's intense gaze and he's never felt so freaking wanted. Yes, his audience during his strip dances and his clients while giving lap dances want him, but Kurt would never have sex with any of them. Yet, Kurt is supposed to have sex with Dave and unlike the guys Kurt has slept with, Dave looks like he's doing a big effort not to devour him.

Dave's just there, letting Kurt grind him and he's so still that Kurt can feel his body tensing beneath him. Dave breathes deeply and slowly, as if he's trying to concentrate in something, but he doesn't say a word and he doesn't move either.

It's hard to feel sexy when you're scrawny thin, your skin is grey and dry and you dress like a hobo. And still, for the first time while being intimate with someone, Kurt feels sexy. And that's ironic since way back then, when he was gorgeous, toned and much more graceful than he's now, Kurt never felt that way.

Kurt grinds Dave's lap harder, making Dave moan and Kurt moans himself when Dave holds himself tighter against his hips.

But Dave doesn't do more than breathing erratically and holding Kurt's hips, and Kurt knows that as the supposed hooker he should be doing all the work here. Yet, he _needs_Dave to do something to him.

Kurt wants to kiss him; for the second time, he wants to kiss and be kissed, but he doesn't kiss Dave. Instead, Kurt licks a stripe over Dave's neck making him moan louder, and he starts undoing the buttons of Dave's shirt. But Dave is still almost not touching him, and Kurt starts feeling self conscious, deprived and frustrated.

"C'mon, Dave. Do something," Kurt almost whines pathetically, feeling more aroused with every second that passes. He hides his face in the hollow of Dave's neck. "Don't you want me?"

And just like that, Dave pins him down against the couch, assaulting his neck. Kurt yelps, being taken by surprise, but he instantly melts at Dave's ministrations once they finally arrive. For a small second Kurt wishes Dave was ravishing his lips instead of his neck, but it still feels so damn good that he can't manage to care.

Dave's hands roam all over Kurt's body, and when he kisses Kurt on his jaw he squirms beneath Dave. He starts pulling Dave's shirt open but he's quickly frustrated as he finds a tee underneath it.

"Come here," Dave breathes out, standing up and Kurt already misses Dave's warmth. What the hell is wrong with him? When has he ever been so needy? "Bedroom." Dave commands with his hand out for Kurt, and when Kurt takes it, Dave pulls him against himself, getting Kurt on his feet until they are pressed together.

They stare silently at each other for one long second. Dave's gaze is on Kurt's mouth and Kurt wonders why they aren't kissing. It's the second time they're doing something so intimate and Dave always goes for his neck, ear or jaw. Never his mouth. Dave seems to want it, but still, he doesn't do it.

Kurt wants them to kiss. It's stupid, maybe. According to Pretty Woman, hookers don't kiss their clients but Kurt needs this, so he won't feel so bad about himself. If they at least kissed, like any other couple that h sex, then maybe Kurt wouldn't feel like he's such a whore. Even if he's pretending to be one. Well, not pretending to be one; he's one tonight.

This is really driving him insane.

So Kurt closes the space between them, and when he's about press his mouth against Dave's, Dave moves faster, dodging him and Kurt suddenly feels Dave nibbling his ear. He instantly lets out a loud groan, since that always feels good but that doesn't help him to feel any less frustrated, so he pushes Dave away, taking a few steps back.

"I think I should go," Kurt states, resolved.

This won't work. He can't deny he was sort of enjoying their fooling around, but he can't help feeling self conscious. It's even worse than when he had sex with his ex-boyfriends; he did feel self conscious, but at least he –stupidly- trusted in them since they were in a relationship. This is a whole new level of self-consciousness; in the past, he just felt un-sexy. Now he feels cheap and dirty.

Dave gives him a confused and sort of concerned look. "What? But- Did I do-"

"Do I disgust you?" Kurt cuts him off, crossing his arms over his chest, aggravated. "I mean, why do you want me here if I disgust you?"

God, this is so stupid but seriously, Kurt is discovering a whole new level of self- loathing. Dave is still staring at him, almost confused and Kurt wishes he could avoid his eyes.

"What?"

"Why don't you want to kiss me? I mean, we've already done more than that, and you seem to want to kiss me, but you don't do it," Kurt states, slightly angry. Is it because he's supposedly a hooker? Yes, Dave could think that his mouth has been in terrible places, but that being the case, his ass has been in terrible places as well and Dave still fucked him.

Kurt remembers that he's the hooker here, and Dave has the right to decide to kiss him or not. This is not about him deciding what to do. He's the hooker; he should please Dave by doing whatever Dave wants, even if that's not kissing.

He should go since Kurt wants to go to stop feeling so bad with himself, but he's still there with Dave. There's something about all this that doesn't let him just walk away.

"I'm not disgusted by you, Kurt," Dave states, firmly. "Please, stay. Why would I want you here if I was disgusted by you?"

Kurt shrugs, acting like he doesn't care, even if he feels offended and rejected. He shouldn't though; Dave will be paying him for sex. He has to bear that in mind. "I don't know. It's your money after all," he says, bitterly. "Spend it the way you want."

Once again, Dave frowns. "You want me to kiss you?"

Kurt arches an eyebrow, still offended. Dave takes a step closer to him and Kurt doesn't move, realizing that he still wants that someone around; even if it's Dave and even if it makes him feel like hell. Then Kurt wishes Dave just fucked him already so he can leave this place, and drown himself into a puddle of self pity, hating himself for falling so low.

"Kurt?"

"It doesn't matter what I want_, David_. I'm the hooker, right?"

He's doing a terrible job at being friendly; he's far from acting like Vivian in Pretty Woman, but he can't help it. His head is full of contradictory thoughts, and Dave keeps on moving closer to him, until they are right in front of each other once again.

"Listen," Dave starts and Kurt stares to the floor, avoiding his gaze. "I know you probably don't want to do any of this; I can't think of anyone who'd like to have your job," Kurt wants to kill himself for letting Dave believe he's a freaking whore. He should be mad at himself and not at Dave. After all, it's all his own fault. "And maybe it doesn't make much sense, but even if I still want you to stay and spend the night with me I don't want you to do anything you don't want with me. I always thought that, kissing… you don't do that with, well, clients. And we have a shitty story in the kissing department, right?"

Dave lets out a sad laugh and finally Kurt looks up, hating him. Ever since when is Dave Karofsky so freaking noble? If Dave was just an asshole like he used to be, they would have kissed already and this whole situation could have been easily avoided.

But Kurt doesn't even have time to process the fact that for some reason that escapes his comprehension, Dave somehow cares about his feelings; a freaking whore's feelings. All that Kurt gets in quick reasoning is that Dave does want to kiss him but he's not doing it, and Kurt won't admit it to Dave but he wants to be kissed so screw it.

Kurt quickly throws his arms around Dave's neck and attaches their lips together, so fast that this time Dave doesn't have time to dodge him.

Nothing happens at first. Dave only lets out a surprised whimper and then they stay completely still, and Kurt's heart flips as he feels unwanted until finally, Dave starts kissing him back. Then Dave's arms are around his waist and Kurt sighs, blissfully not realizing until now how much he missed to be kissed. It's a small affection, but now…

The kiss is tender, and Kurt quickly forgets about what was upsetting him. He initiated the kiss, but he still feels like Dave caught him off his guard, being unable to form any coherent thought.

Dave moves softly his lips against Kurt's and Kurt responds the same way, applying a couple of soft kisses into Dave's mouth until Dave licks Kurt's lips, parting them open, to carefully slid his tongue inside Kurt's mouth.

For a fraction of second, Kurt has the feeling that Dave is almost hesitant of his actions, almost as if he's expecting some bad reaction from him. So Kurt decides to end with Dave's hesitation and welcomes his tongue in his mouth, pushing his own hard against Dave's.

They both moan at the same time; Dave holds him tighter in his arms, kissing him lusciously and _Lord_so pleasantly. The kiss starts quickly turning heated. Dave hungrily ravishes his mouth, and Kurt does exactly the same with Dave's. He starts growing hotter; he clings hard to Dave as if he's not getting enough from this endless kiss.

In a quick movement, Dave's strong arms lift Kurt into the air, and out of instinct Kurt wraps his legs around Dave's waist without breaking their kiss. Kurt startles at this sudden and surprising motion, but a groan escapes from his mouth as he feels a hundredth times more turned on than he was before. None of his boyfriends had ever lifted him in the air; it feels pretty amazing and Dave's strength is incredibly arousing.

Kurt kisses Dave harder and more desperately as Dave starts walking towards what Kurt presumes it would be his bedroom, and his feet never touch the ground. They don't seem to make it to the bedroom though, since somehow Kurt ends up crushed against a wall, Dave pressing his body against him and Kurt runs his hands through Dave's hair, tugging it, never allowing him to break what's now a reckless and frantic kiss.

Dave groans, and Kurt moans inside Dave's mouth; he's incredibly hard and his erection is trapped between their bodies. The only thing that Kurt can think about right now is how much he wants to get to Dave's bed.

Reluctantly he breaks their hungry making out, and quickly he has Dave's mouth attached to his neck and this time Kurt doesn't mind that Dave decides to go for his neck. He's glad that Dave's mouth is still on him, so he tilts his head giving him a better access and shivers at Dave's so pleasant ministrations.

"Dave," Kurt whimpers. "Bedroom, please."

His throat is dry and he's hotter than he's ever been. Thankfully, Dave resumes his way to his bedroom, never placing Kurt back to the ground and Kurt is glad for that because he enjoys being held up like this, in constant contact with Dave's strong body.

Kurt is so wrapped into his own state of heat that he doesn't realize that they made it to Dave's bedroom until they both fall onto a big and comfortable bed. Dave's on top of him, propped on his elbows not to crush him, and Kurt desperately seeks for Dave's mouth to continue kissing him.

Dave complies, as he starts removing Kurt's clothes. Kurt is sort of thankful that only the moonlight coming through the window is dimly lighting up the room so Dave won't have a great look at his scrawny body.

Kurt always felt self-conscious at being naked with other men, including his boyfriends but Dave makes him forget. Their recklessness seems to suddenly fade; Dave's affections become slow and gentle. He first removes Kurt's shirt, slowly, and as Kurt reveals his naked torso, Dave starts applying soft and tender kisses over his chest. Kurt melts at this, throwing his head back in pleasure. Dave continues removing Kurt clothes in the same way, as if he was some delicate or breakable thing, always so careful and covering him with kisses everywhere and Kurt doesn't do much other than moving when he needs to, letting Dave enjoy him. And Kurt enjoys the treatment as well.

Not being so driven with lust, Kurt has time to realize about how little nervousness he's feeling, which surprises him. He's not sure what he was expecting from this weird date, but it wasn't this for sure. It feels like they are just lovers; obviously it's Dave who takes the lead but he's not bossing him, or asking him to do weird stuff. Dave is not just laying in bed, demanding Kurt to perform some amazing sexual service.

Kurt's not uncomfortable doing this, even if he's now completely naked and hard, and he smiles at that, feeling lighter and more positive about this whole thing. He's got so far, and so far this is not terrible at all. This encourages Kurt; it's such a huge deal having gotten rid of his constant self-consciousness, and he can't believe he achieved that in this particular situation.

Being at more ease with himself, Kurt lets himself go. He likes Dave's sudden tenderness but he kind of needs him naked too, and maybe a bit rougher like they were doing it before. He will be disturbed about how much he likes Dave being rough to him later; now he just wants that feeling back.

Kurt grabs Dave –who's currently kissing his hips and belly- by his shirt, forcing him up until they are face to face again. They attach their mouths together, and Dave starts kissing him more hungrily as his hands roam all over Kurt's naked body.

Kurt breaks the kiss, tugging Dave's shirt. "Take this off already," he says, half annoyed and half impatient. Seriously, is Dave going to remain fully clothed?

Thankfully, Dave breaks apart only to get on his feet beside the bed to take of his clothes and even if Kurt doesn't have a great view due the lack of light, he can see Dave's broad silhouette. H has never been with a guy as big as Dave; all his boyfriends were pretty alike, physically. Skinny or slender like himself, same height or maybe shorter than him, like Blaine or Christian.

Dave's not that much taller than he is himself, but he's at least twice his width and Kurt's cock twitches in interest. Dave's build is definitely something good for a change.

Dave only takes a few seconds to strip himself, but when he finally lies on top of Kurt, Kurt embraces him; it feels like Dave's been apart forever. He groans as their bare erections press against each other but he frowns at the same time, since he quickly notices that Dave isn't fully naked.

But Dave starts kissing him, grinding their hips together and both of them moan. Kurt throws his arms around Dave's waist and he tugs the tee that for some freaking reason Dave is still wearing.

"Take this off," Kurt mutters between kisses, wanting to feel Dave's skin against his.

Dave seems to choke some air and stays still for a second. Kurt can sense there's something going on; the atmosphere is suddenly awkward. Dave says nothing, and Kurt can tell he's somewhat upset. Under his touch, Dave's body feels incredibly tense and almost rigid.

"David?"

"I… I can't-" he stutters at first. "I won't take it off."

"Okay," Kurt says quietly. First of all, because being him the hooker, he can't really demand something of Dave. But mostly because it's pretty obvious how Dave's behavior changed radically at the prospect of removing his tee.

He realizes that even if he knows who Dave is, he really doesn't _know_Dave. He probably didn't know who Dave was back in high school. Does Dave have any bad scars, or something under his shirt? There's something underneath that shirt clearly upsets Dave and Kurt doesn't know what it is, so he doesn't push it.

They were doing fine just some seconds before, so Kurt cups Dave's face, bringing him closer and kisses him passionately, quickly getting Dave back into his previous lustful mood. He licks Kurt's ears, driving him crazy and then Dave forces them to breaks apart.

"Turn over," he says, and before Kurt even has time to do what he's been told to, Dave puts his arm under Kurt's waist, flipping him over like he weighs nothing.

Kurt surely is blushing at being manhandled and at liking it. He buries his face into a pillow as Dave roughly pushes his legs apart. Kurt freaks out for a second, because Dave is already going to fuck him? Dave positions himself on top of him, Kurt can feel Dave's hard erection against his ass, but his thoughts are interrupted by a moan, his own, as Dave bites his shoulder.

"Oh, fuck!" Kurt moans in pleasure as Dave bites him hard, and it hurts a bit but freaking Lord, Kurt loves it.

Yes, his past boyfriends have playfully nibbled him, but never really bit him. This feels so good.

It's obvious that by moaning like that, Dave learns that he did right by biting him, so he does it again, and again, and Kurt moans and squirms each time. Dave continues sucking and biting and licking Kurt's shoulder and then he starts doing it all the way down his back, until he can feel Dave's hands on his ass, parting his cheeks.

Before Kurt can realize of what's happening, Dave's tongue in his hole and Kurt really loses it. This is so damn hot, and feels so good that Kurt can hardly stand himself and Dave is not gentle in this, and Kurt doesn't give a damn. Dave's almost an animal; Kurt feels like Dave's trying to stick his tongue all the way up his ass as he pushes farther up to the bed with the force of his efforts.

Kurt closes his eyes tight as Dave pushes in with his tongue, opening him further, then all the way inside, lapping at the core of him. It's almost like Dave's tongue is fucking him and Kurt's face contorts as he almost hyperventilates for panting so much.

Kurt has never been so turned on in his life. His cock is trapped between his body and the mattress, and he has the feeling he could come just from this. But he doesn't. Kurt can't manage to move or to think, only moan in pleasure and abandon his body to Dave's assault.

Suddenly the rimming stops, and Kurt slumps into the bed a bit, feeling almost devastated. He's so horny, and hard and euphoric that he really needs to get fucked right now.

"Dave, please fuck me," Kurt cries out, not being able to stand it anymore.

Dave snorts, but Kurt can tell he's sort of amused. "You'll have to wait a bit, doll."

"David! Do it now," Kurt whines, hitting the pillow as Dave removes himself from on top of him. Seriously, what is he playing at? He can't just turn him on like that and leaving him hanging on.

"We'll get on there, believe me," he replies gently, but in a deeper than normal voice. "But I'm not gonna hurt you like the last time."

Kurt frowns for a second and then he remembers how it actually hurt when Dave entered him the first time at The VIP. "Oh."

"Yeah," Dave says, almost apologetically and Kurt wants to say something to stop Dave from feeling bad, but when he realizes that Dave is getting hat he assumes it's lube and condoms out of his bedside table, another thought strikes Kurt's mind.

Kurt curses himself for being such an idiot. He didn't bring condoms and thank God Dave has some. He's doing a terrible job portraying Vivian from Pretty Woman. She had condoms of all sizes and colors, while Kurt is supposedly a hooker who carries no protection.

But Kurt quickly forgets about it, because as soon as Dave finds what he was looking for, he positions himself back behind him. For a half of a second, being obviously driven by lust, Kurt wishes Dave just fucked him already, until he feels Dave's sticky fingers –obviously lubed up- probing his entrance.

Dave sticks one finger inside Kurt, and he's damn tight but because of the previous rimming, his hole opens easily to Dave's finger. It's slightly uncomfortable, but it doesn't hurt. Still, Kurt gets more and more aroused as he pays attention to Dave's labored breathing. He fingers Kurt slow and carefully, obviously trying not to hurt him and Kurt can tell that it's taking Dave a lot of effort to concentrate on not fucking him right now.

It's hard to follow Dave's rollercoaster behavior. At first Dave's hesitant, then he lets go and he's all wild, lifting him in the air and grinding him against a wall, then he undresses and kisses Kurt all over so tenderly and softly, but then he manhandles him and rims him like there's no tomorrow and now he's back, being careful as he prepares him.

Kurt is used to soft and romantic sex, but he kind of wants to see animal Dave again. It scares him a bit, being something he's not used in bed but it's incredible arousing, and it's an incredible ego boost to be with someone who's clearly showing lots of self-control in order not to ravish you.

One finger becomes two, and then three and Kurt still feels a bit tight but he can't wait anymore. He's also experiencing a weird feeling of… he can't even explain it. Kurt just wants Dave to have him. Or to better say, to give himself to Dave. It's almost the same, but Kurt knows it's not because the only thing he can think, as he pants and squirms on the mattress, is that Dave is being so good to him that Kurt wants to be good for him too.

And Kurt doesn't know how to, but clearly Dave knows what he wants to do with him, so Kurt wants to give himself to Dave, as if he was a reward and allow Dave to do whatever he wants with him.

"Dave, enough," Kurt says with a hoarse voice. His throat is dry from so much panting.

"Are you sure?" Dave breathes out, obviously worked up.

"Please," he pants, and shivers as Dave slides his fingers out of him.

"Come here," Dave grunts, holding him by his hips and propping him into his hands and knees.

Kurt is starting to realize that he loves when Dave grabs him by his hips, since he instantly misses his touch when Dave kneels between his legs, and busies himself with the condom.

Dave runs his hand up Kurt's spine and Kurt groans, in arousal and anticipation. He fists his throbbing cock, for the first time since they start fooling around and he moans, but he quickly stops touching himself or he's going to come right now.

Finally, Dave rubs the head of his cock up and down the crack of Kurt's ass, popping it into his hole just a bit each time. Kurt feels wild to have Dave in him, pushing his ass towards him, begging him to stick it in... And Dave slides the head of his cock inside Kurt's ass and his cock is thicker than three fingers, so it stings a bit, even more when the head slides past his ring. Kurt's body reacts to the intrusion, trying to pull away but Dave grabs him by his waist, to hold him in his place but pushing his cock further inside Kurt's ass in the process.

"Oh, fuck!" Kurt almost screams, mostly in pain.

"Sorry, I'm sorry I didn't mean to," Dave hurries to say, sounding guilty. "How come you're so fucking tight?"

Kurt shakes his head quickly, like it doesn't matter and Dave stays completely still, obviously waiting for him to get used to the intromission. Kurt relaxes because it's not that painful, he's actually blown away because the throbbing feels amazing. Kurt's whole body throbs as Dave's cock throbs deep in his ass…

Fuck, Dave prepared damn him well… And he wants Dave to see he's good because he wants Dave to fuck him hard like the other night, and he's so turned on that he wants this to happen as soon as possible.

"Dave, please move," Kurt almost begs, not being able to wait any longer and Dave complies, burying his cock painfully slowly, all the way inside his ass.

They both groan at the same time, Kurt can't tell if in pleasure or pain, but he doesn't care because it feels beyond good... He predicts that Dave is going to stay still once again, waiting for him to get used to his whole cock inside him, and Kurt doesn't want to wait anymore.

So Kurt pushes himself back towards Dave, hoping that Dave will pick up the hint and Dave starts moving, in slow thrusts first. Kurt still hasn't seen how big Dave is, but just like the previous night, he feels huge, almost splitting him in half, so he's glad that Dave's taking it slow right now.

But Kurt is way too aroused and it doesn't take him long to start feeling a huge wave of pleasure invading his body. His breathing picks up, and the slow thrusts become something that he can hardly bear. As Dave fucks him in long slow steady thrusts the pleasure start carrying him away.

"Faster," Kurt breathes out, and Dave speeds up a little, making him moan. Kurt feels Dave's fingers loosening on his hips and when Dave's about to let him go, Kurt catches one of Dave's hands -doing and incredibly effort not to fall onto the mattress for holding himself up with one hand- drawing it back to his hip.

"Fuck, Kurt," Dave moans, understanding and holding on so tight that Kurt's sure he's going to be bruised tomorrow and that thought only turns him on more, if that's even possible.

"H-Harder," Kurt finds himself saying and Dave obliges with one long smooth thrust ramming his cock deep in his ass. Kurt grunts and gasps as Dave slams against him, the delight making him catch his breath.

Dave grabs him hard by his hips, forcing his ass back and forward against his cock, much harder than before. This time Kurt moans, loud and wild, like a freaking whore, which is convenient since that's what he's supposed to be.

"Ngh, fuck," Kurt breathes out, down in pure and absolute bliss. "Just like that."  
>Dave's thrusts turn relentless, driving in and pulling out like a jackhammer. By this time, Kurt's gotten used to the pounding. It hurts a bit, but it's so incredibly good that he can't manage to care. It's like he's not himself anymore, but he's still there, being able to absorb this whole new type of sex, hard and rough, something he would have never done before, but now that he's doing it, far from feeling ashamed of himself, he loves it.<p>

And he loves the fact that Dave is surely having the time of his life with him, something that Kurt could never manage achieve with his ex boyfriends. All of them dumped him for being a boring fuck, but Dave seems far from bored with him. Kurt knows he's lucky that Dave has a much more dominant spirit in bed than he himself, so Kurt doesn't have to let him know he sucks at sex. But still, for the first time Kurt feels that maybe he's not a maneater or a super slut at sex who takes the initiative since he never does; it doesn't matter though, because he's desirable to someone. Someone who's fucking the hell out of him, and this makes their sex fest something ten times more lustful, as if the sex itself wasn't lustful enough.

"Oh, God," Kurt grunts, as Dave increases the speed of his thrusts. Kurt didn't even think that was possible.

"Shit, Kurt. You're-"

"Oh, _fuck_Dave!" Kurt cuts him off, as Dave cock finds his prostate. His brain starts melting in bliss.

"There?" Dave asks, cockily. His hands move to Kurt's shoulders, pushing his body backwards as he fucks him royally, hitting him in the right spot over and over.

Kurt arches his back in pleasure; his arms grow weak and he'd be falling down onto the mattress if it wasn't for Dave gripping hard to his shoulders, pulling his body onto his cock. Kurt's hole fills with Dave's hot hard cock; with a thrust and a groan he can feel Dave's balls slapping against his ass.

His head starts hurting, feeling dizzy in ecstasy and his erratic breathing doesn't help him. He's hard and it hurts as well, but he has the feeling that if he takes one of his hands off the mattress to touch himself, he's going to fall onto the bed and he doesn't want Dave to stop fucking him not now nor ever.

"Dave, please," he moans, wantonly.

"What is it, doll?" Dave asks, with such a hot and even voice that drives Kurt insane. It's the second time Dave calls him that in bed, and Kurt can't say he dislikes it.

"Touch me or I'm going to die," his voice sounds almost like a cry.

Dave's hands find their way off his shoulders, and onto Kurt's chest forcing him to straighten up. His back ends up pressed against Dave's chest, and he never stops fucking him. Dave holds Kurt straight up on his knees, bracing him with one arm and then he takes Kurt's swollen cock with his hand, pumping it hard and Kurt almost sees the stars.

"FUCK! YES!" Kurt screams, throwing his head back over Dave's shoulder.

With one hand Dave jerks him off, and he starts running his other hand all over Kurt's chest. Dave stopped thrusting; he's not fucking Kurt, he's only pumping his cock and Kurt would like him to move, but every time Dave pumps his cock, Kurt falls apart.

Dave bites his neck and Kurt groans, and then Dave's hand moves from his chest up to Kurt's chin, leading him onto a heated kiss. It's hard for Kurt to kiss him, being too focused in his cock swelling and his balls tight in bliss.

And then it hits; the first signals are in the uncontrollable tightening of his body. Kurt's eyes begin to blur as Dave jerks him off faster.

"Come," Dave mutters into Kurt's ear. "Come for me."

But Kurt doesn't want to. Dave's cock is hard and deep buried up in his ass, and even if Dave's not thrusting inside him it feels so freaking good, and his cock being jerked so tight and fast… Kurt holds himself back for a moment, almost being unable to breathe.

"I don't want to," he whispers, and it sounds like a sob.

Dave slowly lowers his hand from Kurt's chin to his throat, holding him tight. Kurt instantly loses it at this touch, still trying not to come even if he's so damn close. Dave's large hand feels so great around his throat that he can't even believe it.

"Dave!" Kurt pants, holding himself onto Dave's thighs.

Dave applies a little more pressure onto Kurt's throat, not choking him but Kurt still holds his breath; he grows dizzy and Dave jerks him off so furiously that Kurt can't believe he hasn't come yet.

"Come now," Dave grits between his teeth, almost choking him this time and that's it.

"Oh, fuck, Dave! _Dave!"_Kurt screams pressing himself against Dave's chest as he comes, an unstoppable tide, a flood of come pounding from his depths.

Dave instantly releases his hand from Kurt's throat, but he keeps stroking his cock all the way through his orgasm, pumping all the semen out of Kurt's balls and Kurt is just there on his knees, leant back against Dave's chest being completely incapable to think or to move, immersed in total ecstasy. He's breathless and shaking when the final climatic burst rumbles through his body. He's all muzzy-headed. The orgasm is that intense; like he'd sort of floated out of his body and had to find his way back in.

"Fuck, you're so hot," Dave mutters, stroking Kurt's spent cock every time slower until he stops.

Kurt's body is boneless and heavy at the same time, and Dave pushes him forwards. His cock slides out from Kurt's ass as he falls heavily on his stomach onto the mattress. Kurt's so spent that he can't even move; he's still trying to come back to reality but his orgasm left him completely dizzy. He didn't realize how much tension he built up trying not to come until his muscles start relaxing.

As he slowly comes back to his senses; he can feel his come in his stomach, realizing that he came all over Dave's comforter. Dave lies down next to him, tenderly caressing his back.

"Are you alright?" Dave inquires quietly. Kurt lets out a breathless and faint laugh. "I take that as a 'yes'."

Kurt's body grows limp and he hasn't felt so relaxed since the last time he went to a spa, and he can't even remember when the last time he did that was. He's about to shut his eyes to get the greatest sleep when it hits him: he's not relaxed because he went to a freaking spa. Dave Karofsky fucked the hell out of him, giving him a mind-blowing orgasm and…

"You didn't come," Kurt states, close to freaking out and even if it's dark, he turns his head to one side face Dave. It bothers him the fact that Dave didn't get off with him.

"Nope," Dave says care freely and Kurt gets even more upset. With himself, mostly since he couldn't make Dave come!

It's like the ghost of all his past relationships show up, haunting him and he's very aware that he's not in a relationship with Dave, but all his ex boyfriends were clearly not satisfied with him and it's happening again. And the fact that Dave doesn't seem to mind not having gotten off, it pisses him off.

And he _is _the hooker in here, he's supposed to get his _client_off. He wants Dave to have a great time with him, because Kurt had the time of his life. Kurt feels the sudden urge to satisfy Dave.

"And you don't mind?" Kurt inquires, unable to conceal the bitterness in his voice.

"Hey, night's young."

Dave's right; Kurt just arrived and he's going to spend the night in here, so it doesn't mean that everything's over right now. But Kurt is not comfortable with the fact that he just had an incredible orgasm and Dave is laying next to him, like nothing happened.

A billion of thoughts invade Kurt's mind, trying to figure out what to do. This is why he sucks so badly at sex: he never knows what the fuck to do with himself or to his partner. He... he could blow Dave, right? He's not the best at performing blow-jobs but lips around a cock are lips around a cock and if Dave's hard, he could get him off. Of maybe he could give him a hand-job, but that wouldn't be too… teenager-ish? A hand-job is nothing compared to the way that Dave fucked him.

Kurt tries to prop himself onto his elbows, in order to move closer to Dave to do _something_but he fails, feeling incredibly weak. He falls back onto the mattress almost as soon as he gets himself a few inches apart from it.

Dave laughs a bit. "What are you doing?"

Kurt clenches his jaw, frustrated. "Trying to get you off. I mean, that's why I'm here, right?" He adds icily.

Dave snorts. "You can't even move," he says, amused and once again, cockily. "Just rest for a while. I'm good."

Dear Lord, Dave Karofsky knows how to piss him off. And what's even worse is that Dave's right: he's so spent that he's still trying to gain some strength to do something. But he's committed to make Dave come whatever it takes; Dave's laying in his back, next to him and Kurt traces his fingers over Dave's hip, because that's something he can do for now, at least until he gains some strength.

"Kurt, really. There's no- _oh, shit!"_

Kurt grins, achieved as he fists Dave's cock that much to his luck, is still hard. Dave removed his condom at some moment and boy, Dave's big. He lazily pumps Dave's cock, since he really can't do it any harder and he grins and he hears Dave moaning.

But Kurt doesn't want to give Dave a sloppy hand job, which it will be, considering how feeble his touch is. Yet, Dave seems to like it and Kurt wants Dave to like him here, in this bed, having sex...

"Fuck me again," Kurt says, using his flirty voice.

Dave grunts, as Kurt keeps on stroking his hard cock. "Kurt, just rest. I'm good," Dave mumbles but he doesn't push his hand away.

"I don't want to rest. I want you to fuck me until you come," he states, and he's never been into dirty talk and what he said it's not even that dirty, but he's still surprised at him as words come out from his mouth.

But this is perfect. Dave could keep on fucking him, and Kurt doesn't care that he can't really participate in this because of his weak state.

"I can't really say no to you, right?" Dave muses, turning around and getting himself on top of Kurt again.

Kurt is still laying on his stomach, and Dave is kneeling between Kurt's pressed together thighs. Dave leans over him, and it's actually to snatch another condom from the drawer but before straightening back, Dave licks the back of Kurt's neck making him shiver.

But Dave is suddenly gone and Kurt misses his warmth on him. Yet, Dave's fingers are probing his entrance and he easily slides two inside Kurt. "Oh, God," Kurt groans, holding himself once again onto the pillow.

Kurt's still loose, and that's good because he really wants Dave to fuck him right now. Lord, how is he getting aroused like this so soon? He just had a terrific orgasm not even five minutes ago!

And then Dave slams his cock all the way inside Kurt's ass, with one fast and hard thrust and Kurt sees the stars. Dave leans down on top of him; Kurt can feel Dave's hot breath over his ear.

"Until I come, right?" Dave mutters huskily and Kurt feels his guts on fire.

He doesn't even have time to say anything, since Dave holds himself by Kurt's shoulders, and starts thrusting his cock inside his ass mercilessly. Kurt fists the comforter, needing to hold himself onto something and he moans so loud that his throat starts hurting.

It's just too much. Dave's laying on top of him, and the pressure of Dave's body all over him drives Kurt crazy. And he's really getting fucked like there's no tomorrow, since Dave moves his hips up and down, ramming his cock inside and out of his ass, so hard and so desperately that the feeling of being beyond desired hits him again, turning him on the more.

"Holy shit," Kurt grunts, desperately._ "No,"_he whines pathetically.

As if it wasn't hot enough, Dave found his prostate again. God, Dave's supposed to get off on him! Kurt already came!

But Dave suddenly stops moving. "What?" He asks, concerned. "You okay? Did I hurt you? I'm-"

"No, no, no, no, _no!_Please, don't stop," Kurt hurries to say, frustrated and desperate as Dave slides his cock out of his ass.

Against all the odds Kurt's getting hard again, and it hurts since his cock is pretty much spent after his recent orgasm but he's so turned that he just needs more of this.

"You almost cried 'no'," Dave mutters, and fuck, he's still on top of him but not moving. In addition, he can feel Dave's hard cock pressed against his ass cheeks but not inside of him and Kurt wants to rip his head off, and he would if Dave wasn't on top of him, making him impossible to move.

It embarrasses but he's just going to say it. Maybe that way Dave will be pleased with himself and continue to fuck him.

"I'm getting hard again," Kurt snaps and Dave chokes a laugh. "Yeah, you laugh now. I just came, I'm all sensitive, my cock is sensitive and now is trapped against the mattress and on top of everything you're hitting my prostate. I'm dying in here, again in record time. Happy? Can you move now?"

"I'll move all you want me to, doll," Dave says with his deep voice and Kurt shivers again.

Dave slides his arm beneath Kurt chest, and flips him onto his back at the same time that Dave removes himself on from on top of Kurt. Kurt yelps in surprise when he lands onto his back, missing Dave's body over himself but God, his cock feels a billion times better now that it's not pressed between him and the mattress.

Dave gets off the bed, standing by one of its sides, and grabs Kurt's ankles pulling him towards himself until Kurt ends up laying at the edge of the mattress, as Dave keeps his legs straight up into the air. Kurt ends up with only his shoulders laying on the bed, and he gets even harder, aroused by how tightly Dave's hands are holding his legs.

Dave pushes Kurt's legs forward towards the bed, leaving his ass completely exposed and his cock twitches almost painfully. Then Dave places himself in front of his exposed ass, spreading his ass cheeks apart, forcing his hole to open for him again.

"God, Dave. Do you want me to beg?" Kurt asks, as desperate as he has ever felt to get some cock in his ass.

And then he realizes that, as pathetic as it sounds… he will beg Dave to fuck him if he has to. To the hell with his pride, he really wants Dave's cock inside his ass and he's so painfully hard and turned on that he can't even feel embarrassed for being needy like this.

"You don't have to beg to me for anything," Dave muses, and Kurt knows there's a smug on his face. "Fuck until we _both_come, right?"

"Yes, please!" Kurt whines, fisting the comforter again and Dave plows his hard cock directly down into his stretched out hole.

They both moan; Kurt's body squirms in pleasure as Dave relentlessly forces his cock inside him. Dave then again grabs Kurt's legs by his ankles and starts pushing his cock in and out his ass. His balls pound Kurt's ass as he fucks him and Kurt's astounded at how good he's feeling. The remaining of his previous orgasm is still there, and he's so sensitive that every time that Dave does _anything_, Kurt feels like he's about to explode in pleasure.

Dave keeps slamming his cock back and forth, and they both pant and groan. Kurt's painfully hard and he can sense in every cell of his body that another orgasm is starting to build up, and Dave ramming his prostate over and over so damn accurately doesn't help him to hold it back. He's desperate too touch himself, but he doesn't want to come and this time is for real. He won't let himself come before Dave.

And it's so freaking hard that Kurt wants to cry; Dave's fucking him almost brutally and the pleasant pressure building in his balls and his prostate is nearly unbearable. He needs Dave to come right now, so he can come too.

"Fuck, Kurt," Dave growls, slamming his cock harder inside Kurt's ass.

"Oh, God. Please, Dave," Kurt begs, hoping for Dave to come or he's going to die. "I'm dying here."

Finally Kurt feels Dave's cock swelling even larger inside his ass, and his thrusts become more erratic. Kurt grins, knowing that Dave's close. God, so close; Dave's really going to get off on him and his own cock twitches, feeling so hot and so much in ecstasy that when his orgasm hits him it takes him by surprise.

"Oh, shit! Fuck! Nghhh, _FUCK!_" Kurt screams as his cock goes into his own orgasmic fit.

He didn't even touch himself, but his whole body is suddenly rigid in such a pleasure that it blinds him, and he can't hardly realize that his own come is spaying all over his chest and his neck.

"Fuck, Kurt! I'm- I'm-" Dave panting gets heavier as he continues to plow into Kurt's ass, while Kurt is still shaking and contracting every muscle of his body. Dave's thrusts feel a billion times harder as he clenches his ring, and Dave moans desperately.

Kurt orgasm lingers; his wretched prostate is still getting hammered by Dave's cock. Dave holds Kurt's legs as he slams the last few erratic thrusts into his ass, as he comes inside Kurt.

Kurt didn't realize how loud he was screaming until his orgasm subsided; he didn't even realize he was screaming at all. He's never cum this hard before, not even touching himself and it's like his entire lower body had been blown apart. It startles him.

He simply lies there, in a total ecstasy. He's pretty sure that a huge amount of brain cells died with that orgasm since he's having really trouble functioning. If that first orgasm blew his mind, this one has literally blown apart his brain.

Dave draws his cock out of Kurt's ass and both of them groan at the same time. Dave's panting loudly, and with a shaky touch he lets go of Kurt's legs, placing them carefully onto the floor. Kurt falls heavily onto the mattress, and his brain starts shutting off. He can't speak, move or do anything.

Dave lets himself fall down next to Kurt, and Kurt can listen to his heavy breathing. He smiles. Not only he had the most amazing orgasms in his entire life, but also got Dave off with him. Kurt didn't do much, but he did well enough.

Kurt is still panting, but he starts breathing a bit better. "Was that good?" He can't help asking. He really needs Dave to confirm that he was good.

Dave exhales. "Are you seriously asking me that?"

Kurt shrugs, faintly. "I guess," he says, and starts feeling small. And drowsy. God, so drowsy. He's lying in the bed in a not very comfortable position but he feels he could sleep forever.

Still, the little part of his brain that still works and worries, and he knows he shouldn't be asking this of Dave. If he's a hooker, he's supposedly skilled and he wouldn't be asking his clients about his performance. But he's not a hooker, even if Dave doesn't know that, and Kurt can't help worrying.

It's not just about Dave coming. As any other men, Dave could easily come by jerking himself off. As any of Kurt's ex boyfriends, they could come while fucking him and then go find a better way to come.

Dave takes his condom off, and takes from the drawer a couple of tissues that he uses to wipe the come from Kurt's chest and neck.

"Thanks," Kurt mumbles.

He feels Dave getting off the bed, and for a second he worries. He doesn't know why, but he takes Dave leaving the bed so soon, leaving _him_so soon as a bad sign. But then, he doesn't hear Dave leaving. Instead, Dave pulls the comforter down, uncovering the sheets.

"Hey, come here. Under the covers; you're going to cool down and get cold."

"I don't like cold," Kurt replies, almost falling asleep.

Dave laughs quietly. "Then get under the covers."

But Kurt seriously can't move. If that first orgasm let him completely spent, this one... this one almost killed him.

"I can't move," he says weakly, making Dave laugh. "It's not funny."

"It is, actually," Dave says, and Kurt feels him climbing back in the bed, behind him and then Dave hooks his arms under Kurt's armpits, pulling him towards one of the sides of the bed.

"Hey!" Kurt preaches, and he would be getting turned on again if he wasn't so spent. Seriously, what's with Dave manhandling him that likes him so much?

"Sorry, doll."

Dave walks around the bed, pulling the covers and laying down next to him.

"Seriously, Dave," Kurt says, doing his best to keep himself awake. "Was it good?"

"You came without even touching yourself," Dave points out, and Kurt is not sure if Dave is avoiding his question on purpose. But he's still not answering and Kurt can't think that as something good. Is Dave trying to be nice, not telling him he was an awful fuck?

"I did."

"Hell of a great orgasm I guess."

"I think I lost a bunch of IQ points when I came," Kurt jokes, quietly, even if he really thinks that might have happened.

"Good."

Kurt sighs, almost wretched and his eyelids feel like they weight a hundred pounds each. "Please, tell me."

"What thing?"

"Was it good?"

There's a moment of silence, and Kurt's stomach flips. He hears Dave swallowing hard, and then he finally breaks the silence. "It was awesome," Dave says quietly.

Kurt's lips move upwards in a weak smile. "Good."

* * *

><p>It's only ten past midnight and Dave can't sleep. He's had a shower, got a clean tee and underwear, came back to bed and Kurt remains laying there, peacefully asleep. Dave turned on the lights of his bedside table, just to stare at him, and he's probably been staring at Kurt's sleeping figure for easily the last hour and he still has hard time comprehending his reality.<p>

Because somehow, life gave a major twist and now, Kurt Hummel is naked, in his bed, sleeping soundly next to him after a pretty amazing session of sex.

Dave can't understand what happened. Of course, he's pretty aware that they fucked, that he made Kurt come not once but twice, and that now Kurt is sleeping next to him in his bed.

Never in a million years, Dave expected this to happen. Ever. And now that it's happened, Dave doesn't know how to deal with it.

He stares at Kurt, who's laying on his stomach, his cheek pressed against the pillow facing him. He's covered up to the waist, allowing Dave to admire his back, his slender shoulders and his long arms. There are some red and purplish spots in Kurt's skin, and Dave's torn between feeling guilty and proud for marking Kurt like that. He hates the idea of bruising Kurt, because he doesn't want to hurt him in any way, but Kurt seemed to really enjoy when he bit him… or maybe Kurt was just being a good whore.

Dave tries not to think about that. He doesn't want to think that maybe, Kurt pretended to enjoy all they sex they had. He made Kurt come twice, after all and you can't fake coming.

Dave wonders if other clients make Kurt enjoy sex. Probably not, considering that they fuck him in a freaking booth after paying seventy bucks. But then, Dave doesn't want to think about that either because he hates the idea of Kurt suffering every time he has to get fucked by some random guy, but at the same time, he hates the idea of Kurt enjoying sex with strangers.

He hates the idea of Kurt being a hooker overall. He's aware that he shouldn't hate it so much, since if Kurt wasn't a hooker, they wouldn't have had sex in the first place. Dave should be grateful enough that Kurt agreed to come to his place.

As his gaze remains fixed on Kurt, he notices how thin Kurt is. He noticed this before, when he touched and kissed Kurt's entire body but he was high on lust back then. It's not like everything Dave thinks about is people's weight; Dave just thinks about his own weight, but it's impossible for him not to notice that Kurt is way too skinny, and bony.

It doesn't make Kurt any less appealing, bit it does worry Dave. He never really knew Kurt, and he still doesn't know anything about Kurt's life. He wants to ask though; he's dying to know how the most incredible and talented guy in McKinley ended up turning into a hooker.

Dave spent a lot of time watching at Kurt back in McKinley, and it's been long since the last time they saw each other until they met again. Kurt has grown up of course, even if he still looks way younger than he is. But the lack of meat in his body it's also noticeable in his face.

So Dave wonders if Kurt's alright. It's obvious that he isn't, otherwise he wouldn't be getting himself fucked for living, but Dave wonders if that's enough. Dave wonders if Kurt ever eats, and if he eats healthy or even if he's healthy overall. He knows he can't ask though, at least not now. They've hardly talked at all, so they can't just sit down, have a coffee and catch up with their lives like they were once friends.

Kurt stirs in his sleep, and snuggles closer to Dave. Dave catches his breath, feeling Kurt's body almost pressed against him.

_Fuck, you're so gorgeous,_Dave thinks as he keeps on staring at the sleeping man.

He knows he's fucked; royally fucked because Kurt is there, sleeping blissfully, so beautiful and so perfect even if he is a hooker and Dave feels incredibly unworthy. He's not sure what he did in his life to deserve a chance to be like this with Kurt, but he feels deeply undeserving.

Dave lowers himself in the bed, laying down next to Kurt. He turns on his side, just to appreciate Kurt's sleeping face from a closer perspective and he really hates his life. This guy is seriously breathtaking.

He listens to this soft whistling sound that Kurt makes on his sleep, and frowns. He's never heard someone making that noise while sleeping, but it's cute. Kurt stirs again, and he slowly opens his green or blue eyes –Dave can't find a color to describe those bright eyes. Dave feels guilty for waking him up; he left the lights on, it must be interrupting Kurt's sleep.

"You're very warm," Kurt mumbles sleepily.

He instantly moves a little further from Kurt, not wanting to bother him. Of course he's super warm, he sweats a lot… so he moves away, not to disturb Kurt or to invade him or something. There he realizes that his plan of not letting his guard go down, or show any weakness in front of Kurt, is clearly not working. He's such a pussy. He supposedly is paying to fuck Kurt all night long if he wants to, and it's not like it would scare Kurt away since he fucks guys for living.

Dave tries to keep his distance, but he can't. He tries not to let his guard go down, but he fails, like when they finished fucking. Kurt seemed persistent to get him to admit how great the sex was, and fuck, wasn't it obvious? Dave didn't want to tell to Kurt, his former crush now a hooker, a guy for whom Dave's heart hurt for years, was the best fuck in his life.

Dave has had plenty of sex. Ever since he came out and discovered the pleasures of gay sex, he had a lot of one nightstands, and the main thing that kept him and his ex boyfriends together were the long marathons of sex. Dave was probably a terrible guy to have a relationship with, but he knows his ex boyfriends considered him as a great lay so at least it was something.

He's far from being a prude virgin, and he's had sex a hell of a lot of times, but tonight was the greatest. Dave doesn't want to think that it was just because he fucked Kurt, since it was some awesome sex regardless, but deep inside, he knows that being Kurt the one he was fucking has a lot to do in this being the best sex he has ever had.

But Dave succumbed and admitted to him that sex has been indeed amazing. Kurt surely will laugh, later, thinking that it's payback. Dave used to bully the guy who's tonight the one responsible for the best sex he has ever had.

And now, Dave is moving away from Kurt, not to upset him with his hot –not in the sexy way- and sweaty body. He's trying to give his hooker some space. Jesus.

"No, don't go away," Kurt complains, with a sluggish voice. He moves back next to Dave, resting his head on Dave's shoulder. Then Kurt throws his arm around Dave's chest, and pressing himself close to him. "I don't like being cold. You're warm."

Dave stays frozen. Kurt is hugging him in bed, and it takes a few long seconds to wrap his arms around Kurt's body.

It was complicated to have sex with Kurt on the first place, but Dave keeps on picking up stuff that makes him wonder about Kurt's life. It's the second time that Kurt points out that he hates being cold, and maybe it means nothing but Dave still worries.

It all upsets him because he doesn't want his mind to drift in Kurt's direction once again, he really doesn't want to go there, to have his mind filled with Kurt Hummel, but now he has like a million things to make him think, wonder and worry about Kurt.

Kurt is not particularly cold, or his skin doesn't feel cold anyways, but Dave still pulls the comforter up, covering Kurt up to his neck. Kurt cuddles Dave even more.

"Better?" Dave asks quietly, running his hand over Kurt's side.

"Yes. I'm sorry, what time is it?" Kurt inquires, lifting his head slightly until their eyes meet; he looks somewhat disoriented.

Dave swallows hard. "I think half past midnight."

"I'm sorry, I'm not supposed to sleep like this," Kurt says, resting his head back in Dave's shoulder.

"It's okay," Dave replies truthfully. He wanted Kurt to spend the night with him, and he can't blame him for falling asleep. Kurt came twice in a row; of course Kurt surely is not used to sleep… while working, but Dave likes to have him there sleeping with him.

"No, it's not," Kurt states stubbornly. "I'm not supposed to."

Then Kurt opens his eyes wide, staring at Dave once again and blinking repeatedly as he adjusts his sight to the light. Dave can hardly hold his gaze; Kurt's eyes are something incredible.

"Hey, it's not like we didn't do anything," Dave says, almost amused and he can swear that Kurt is blushing. Kurt looks away.

"We certainly did, didn't we?" Kurt looks away, and Dave snorts. Is Kurt somehow embarrassed? He's a hooker after all, he must have done stuff with plenty of men. "Night is young though," he muses, slightly flirtatious. "At what time you have to go to work?"

"Around eight. Got to be there by nine."

Kurt nods; his fingers play with the collar of Dave's tee and Dave can see where this is going. He's getting hard already, and he starts caressing Kurt's hips. "You'll be kind enough to let me use your shower later, right?"

Dave lets out a short laugh. "All the ones you want to," he says, and then he quickly moves on top of Kurt, pinning him against the mattress; Kurt lets out a content moan. "Not now though. What's the point of cleaning you up if you're about to get dirty all over again?"

Kurt lifts his head just slightly, until their lips are pressed together and Dave moans inside Kurt's mouth. Kurt's arms are around him, and Dave can feel him getting hard as well.

"You know, I'm fine with the t-shirt" Kurt says, breaking the kiss and Dave tenses. "But why the hell did you put your underwear back on? Take these off," Kurt ends up playfully, pulling from Dave's boxer's waistband and Dave laughs relieved.

He's glad that Kurt is not asking questions about why he's such a loser that can't even have sex without taking all his clothes off. It's obvious that Kurt is just being a good whore, not upsetting him. And Dave wants to be good for Kurt; sadly, he doesn't know what Kurt needs, and the most that Dave can do is providing him with some enjoyable sex, even if he feels the urge to do more.

* * *

><p>Kurt returns to his place around eight thirty. He pretty much wants to go to bed and cry.<p>

Everything was going quite alright; in fact, it was going even better than Kurt imagined it would be. Dave was not mean at all, at any moment and under any circumstance. What Kurt feared the most, the sex, was incredible and it makes him feel like the whore he pretended to be.

Kurt has never experienced rough sex, but he found himself embarrassingly turned on by how easily Dave manhandled him and how hard he fucked him. Dave fucked him hard, roughly and ruthlessly but never really hurting him; Dave in fact was pretty caring with him and how can you fuck someone so brutally being careful at the same time? Damn him. Kurt's terribly sore, but he couldn't expect any less since he got fucked three times in one night since after doing it a second time around midnight, they fell asleep and Kurt was still quite eager for another round when they woke up in the morning.

Him? Eager for sex? Ever since when? At least that made his hooker act more believable.

He can't help admitting that once he realized how sex was going to be, it became easier. Once he got to realize that Dave was taking the lead, plus how much he enjoyed how Dave took the lead, Kurt followed him. And Dave doesn't know him like his past boyfriends knew him, so it was easier to let himself go, allowing himself to enjoy himself. And boy, he did enjoy himself. Never in his life he had come four times in the same night.

Maybe Kurt had been wrong all along and romantic sex never really worked for him. After the first night with Dave at The VIP and last night, it embarrasses Kurt having to admit to himself that he's clearly into rougher sex. That's something he has never tried before, and probably he wouldn't have ever tried.

But it was easier, because Kurt is now well laid like he has never been before, and he felt comfortable around Dave, knowing that Dave wasn't going to mistreat him or degrade him, and he even felt sexy. It's easy to act sexy when you feel sexy.

It was probably the best thing of having sex with someone who doesn't really know you: they don't have preconception, or prejudices and you don't have to act in a way they expect you to. And maybe Dave wonders how the hell he became a hooker, but it's not his place to ask anyways, and Dave didn't.

They didn't talk much; he also wonders a lot of stuff about Dave, but neither of them actually talked for other than for having sex.

And things were good.

Until the payment part came up.

At some point of the night, Kurt actually forgot he was Dave's whore. It really felt like what having a one nightstand must feel; some casual sex between two people who just met. But then Kurt got himself ready to go, Dave was already dressed in another fancy suit and the uncomfortable moment was in front of their faces.

Kurt could tell it was awkward for Dave as it was for him. They haven't previously talked about any particular amount of money, and it made Kurt miserable having to put a price to… _his services_. And what services were those? Dave gave him four amazing orgasms and Kurt did pretty much nothing but open himself to Dave, as he fucked him blissfully like there was no tomorrow.

Kurt felt like he should be the one paying Dave for giving him the best sex he has ever had. Because really, four freaking orgasms?

Dave didn't know how much money he should hand to him, he said he's never been with a hooker before and Kurt got to know that at least Dave didn't pick hookers constantly. But Kurt didn't know how much Dave should pay him, and he didn't even want to take any money.

But what he was supposed to say? According to Dave, he's a hooker so Kurt couldn't just say, "Hey, this is on me.

At the end, Dave gave him three hundred dollars which was incredibly humiliating. And Kurt had to stop him there since Dave was about to give him even more money. And it was not only humiliating having to receive money after sex, Kurt felt like he was stealing money from Dave, shamelessly.

Maybe three hundred dollars is not a lot of money for Dave, but it's a huge amount for Kurt. And Kurt didn't do anything to be worth three hundred dollars. He actually had a good time; he slept in a warm and comfortable bed, in a warm and comfortable apartment and on top of everything he got some really good sex.

He doesn't know what's worse: getting paid for sex, or not feeling worthy of that money you're receiving.

And it got even more awkward when they said goodbye to each other. They were both uncomfortable after the money thing, and Kurt didn't know if he should kiss Dave or just wave his hand. Dave seemed to have the same dilemma, but at the end, they just said goodbye to each other.

The three hundred dollars feel heavy in Kurt's pocket and he just wants to get rid of it. When he walks into his apartment, he starts taking his clothes off in order to put his pajamas on. It's a good thing that he doesn't have to be at Met Food today since he's quite sore and he could really use some sleep.

On his way to his bedroom, he walks by his Stove Fund jar and he stares at the picture of the stove he wants so much. He's aware that with this extra three hundred dollars he could easily go to the store and buy it. Kurt plays with the money in his pocket, and sighs. He won't get his longed stove after a night of sex; he's not proud of having to strip himself for living, or having to give lap dances to strangers, but he knows how much effort he's expending to get his life back on track.

His stove would be a reward of all the sacrifice he's made. He won't buy his stove, or he'll go by to his winter with an artifact that will represent something that really shames him. He won't buy it with the money he got for whoring himself.

Within a couple of months, he'll deserve that stove. He doesn't deserve the money he got, and it's already shameful he got any money for starters.

He puts the money in a drawer; he'll use it for his debts. He's not in a place to give three hundred dollars to charity, no matter how much that money weighs on him. If he went through so much embarrassment to have it now in his hands, it better be worth for something.

After getting on his bed, Kurt thinks about Dave. Because after saying goodbye to each other, Dave did stop him to ask him if he could call him again.

Kurt thinks that it wouldn't be so bad to be with Dave once again. Asides the good sex, and in spite of the money, he really liked to be in company of another human being, and having someone who holds him in bed and kisses him.

He's aware that he can't be any more pathetic. Before last night, this mess was just about him not wanting to explain to Dave that he wasn't a whore, he just acted like one. Yet, after spending the night with Dave, Kurt realizes how much he's been craving for any kind of affection coming from another person.

Kurt knows how pathetic he is, now that he's not whoring himself for his twisted pride but because he's so freaking lonely.

Still, before falling asleep, Kurt can't do anything but hope that Dave calls him soon.


	5. Chapter 4

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> Pg.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Season One and Two  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Katie!  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 2ooo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.  
><strong>AN:** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
><strong>AN2 Please read:** I'm sorry this update took so long. I got behind writing this, and I had to change betas on the very last minute. It was originally one chapter, splitted in three parts but since they didn't go well together I decided to split them in chapters. And I couldn't really update with only 2ooo words, so I waited to have more to make this update bigger. I hope it was worth the wait!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4<strong>

As he does every day, Dave spends his lunch break in the Battery Park all by his himself. He always politely declines his workmates' invitations to go to some restaurant, bar, or wherever, in order to share lunch together. Nonetheless, he likes this park and not to mention it is also very convenient. The American Express Headquarters is located right in Manhattan's Financial District, and it's a place filled with many places to get a bite to eat. Dave doesn't want to be tempted; he's doing his best not to break his diet for the hundredth time in his life. And he never eats in public. _Ever_. So there's no way in hell he's going to join his workmates for lunch, or go by himself to get something to eat in a _public place_.

Another good thing about spending his lunch breaks in the Battery Park is that it's just a couple of blocks away from his work.

So he sits by himself, always on the same bench drinking a soda. He's having a boring day at work, as usual; but, then again, he has a boring job so it's not like his current state of listlessness is something new to him.

But then his phone starts ringing in his pocket, startling him since it sort of breaks his monotonous routine. He quickly takes it out, assuming that someone from work is calling him, but his blood freezes when his eyes fall upon the screen.

Kurt…_ Calling…_

It's been two days since he spent the night with Kurt. Two exhausting days spent trying not to think about him, which was a bit of a contradiction considering how often than not he would say to himself _'Don't let yourself grow obsessed with Kurt.' _ Even Dave could recognize that having to consciously tell oneself to not think about another person didn't count as _not_ thinking about them.

It depresses him because he knows he's beyond fucked. Kurt never seems to be enough for him.

Dave didn't have Kurt in any way until that night at the club. He had sex with Kurt, and he still craved more. Dave had convinced himself that he only wanted to taste a bit of Kurt. After all, he had a crush on him for years when they were younger, and Dave thought that once he had Kurt, everything would be over. That, finally, he would be able to get some semblance of closure and put an end to something he desired for so long, even if it was years ago.

The night at the club wasn't enough for him, however. He wanted Kurt in his apartment, in his bed—not just to have sex, but also to be able to admire his gorgeous body properly—and be able to sleep with him. He wanted to have Kurt _close_ to him.

Yet, as soon as Kurt left his apartment two days ago, Dave almost feels like he misses him. And it's ridiculous because they didn't share anything other than sex, and Dave doesn't want Kurt to come back to just have more sex, even if the sex _was_ incredible. Dave just wants Kurt near him. He wants to get to know Kurt and find out what happened to him; to learn what had gone so wrong in his life to prompt him into having to whore himself out for living.

Maybe if Dave knew more, he could help Kurt. Or _something_.

The truth is that Dave doesn't know who Kurt is right now, and he really didn't know who Kurt was when they were at McKinley. They were never friends—not even acquaintances.

Dave can hardly handle himself. He's not really capable of rescuing Kurt from… His _job_. There's the chance that Kurt doesn't need or want to be rescued; there's the chance that Kurt wants nothing to do with his former bully. Dave wasn't in much of a position to know what was best for Kurt.

In this moment, Dave is holding on to what could only be described as old and unrealistic hopes. He's letting himself be dragged back to the idealistic, silly dreams he used to have in regards to Kurt when they were both teenagers. And all the things that Dave dreamed of—not only for himself, but for both of them—was nothing more than the product of his silly imagination. They were not real or possible back then and they seemed far more unattainable now, given the circumstances.

No matter how hard he tries, every time that Kurt materializes into his life, Dave feels like he's being hit by a truck. Now—as his phone rings incessantly as Kurt calls him—was one of those times.

'_Don't make a fool of yourself,' _Dave thinks to himself. He could have walked away from the club the first time he spotted Kurt, performing his strip dance routine. He could have declined the bartender's offer to have sex with Kurt in a freaking wooden booth for seventy miserable dollars, and he could have chosen not to take Kurt to his apartment.

He started all of this, so it was better if he faced it head on.

Dave swallows hard and answers the call. "Hey," he greets once he puts the phone to his ear. He forces himself to sound casual and not like he's dying inside, because he's _i/not._

At _all.i/_

"David! Erm, hi," Kurt gushes from the other side. He sounds anxious, and Dave instantly frowns, worried. He can practically hear Kurt pacing around, wherever he's at now.

"Is everything alright?"

"Yes! Yes, I'm—God!" Kurt sighs, frustrated. "I'm sorry for calling you, I hope I'm not bothering you at all, I'm just-"

"Hey, it's okay," Dave assures him. Kurt is speaking fast, like he's nervous about something, and Dave tries his best to remain calm and smooth. If he starts freaking out, then Kurt will only become more anxious. "I'm not doing anything, I'm on my break."

"Oh, good. Good. I didn't want to interrupt you or anything. I'm just being stupid, but-"

"What's wrong, Kurt?" Dave cuts him off, keeping his voice tranquil, at best. Kurt doesn't say anything; the only thing that Dave can hear is his breathing. "Kurt?"

Kurt sighs heavily. "Did you tell someone?" He asks, his voice small.

Dave frowns. "Tell someone what?"

At the other end of the line, Kurt groans like he's frustrated. "About… About us. About _me._ We grew up in Lima and maybe you still have friends back there and, well… You know. No one knows about… Me."

Now Dave understands... And it doesn't make him feel any better; it actually makes him grow more concerned about Kurt. At some point, Dave assumed that Kurt was all by himself, alone in the world. He didn't think about any of the details. Dave just assumed that for some reason, call it death, fights, or something, Kurt has lost contact with his family and friends back in Lima. It had to be that way, because anyone who cared about Kurt just a _little_ would never allow him fall so hard in life. Someone would (or should) have prevented Kurt from becoming a prostitute. Dave wasn't close to Kurt back then and, had he been around the day when Kurt decided that becoming a hooker was his only option, he would have done something about it.

Dave remembers Kurt's dad. The guy really loved his son. Then Finn Hudson became his step-brother and he also had a bunch of friends in the Glee club… These people still exist in Kurt's life, or at least that's what Dave understands. And it's not that no one cares about how Kurt fucks men for living, it's that they don't know that he_ does._

How is this even possible? He knew back then in high school, by Kurt's attitude alone, that he had a lot of pride. But Kurt couldn't exactly ask for help from his family or friends because he's too proud to do so! Is he so proud that he preferred to whore himself than to ask for help? What the hell? Dave is almost raging. How could Kurt do this to himself?

"I just," Kurt continues remorsefully, probably at the lack of response from Dave. "Maybe you still have friends over there. Or your family… It's a small town and gossip spreads fast... They all know me for being gay, they know my dad, and _Lord," _he breathes out, with a mix of worry and sadness in his voice. "If he finds out… He's ill, he has a heart condition, and if word gets around to him, it would literally kill him and I can't-"

"I didn't tell anyone," Dave cuts him off, and with the truth. A wave of sadness slaps him in his face. "I don't have friends back in Lima, and please know that I don't talk to my parents about my sex life. I don't have anyone to tell, Kurt, and even if I did, I wouldn't."

Kurt lets out a relieved, shaky breath. "Thank you. I'm sorry, I just… He called me today and I didn't realize until now that he could find out if you… Well…You know."

Dave is sad and frustrated. This is killing him. Everything that happens makes it incredibly difficult for him not to become even more worried and concerned about Kurt. So it _wasn't_ Kurt's pride that kept him from asking for help while being in so much need; he's just protecting his father.

It's simply not fair. How does this even work? His father calls and Kurt tells him he's perfectly fine when he's actually sleeping with men for money? This is just…

'_Fuck!'_ Dave curses silently to himself, clenching his fists. Life's a freaking bitch.

"You don't have to worry, okay?" Dave assures him. He doesn't want to give Kurt any more troubles. "At least, not from my side. I don't really talk to anyone; no one knows about you."

"Thank you."

Neither of them says anything else, but they are not hanging up either. They stay silent for the longest time, and the only thing that Dave can think about is how much he wants to figure out how to fix Kurt because even if he knows nothing about Kurt's life, Dave is _sure_ that he doesn't deserve any of this.

But Dave is clueless. How do you fix something when you can't understand how it was broken in the first place? And Dave is a mess. He can hardly take care of himself, how can he even think about taking care of Kurt?

He's falling again. Dave's falling into his former obsession with Kurt Hummel.

In the last couple of days, he and Kurt were able to meet again in New York. They had sex and even spent a night together, but this two minute call? It's actually the most they've talked to each other so far, and what little information Dave learned about Kurt is already driving him nuts.

'_It's none of your business.' _Dave tells himself, resolved. He won't do this again. It's not his problem that Kurt is now a whore and that he has—_God_—Who knows how many issues. Dave has his own problems and he can hardly handle them right now. They both got far—for better or for worse—without each other, so Dave is not going delude himself into thinking that Kurt needs him or something.

He'd love to be someone who Kurt needed, but that's Dave's stupid teenager illusion doing the thinking for him again. He's over that. Kurt is not the same person who Dave was in love with, and Dave, himself, is not the same person he was five years ago.

He won't fall for this again.

But he's not strong and he knows it. Dave swallows hard, frustrated with himself because his will is weakening fast and he breaks the silence.

"Are you free on Monday?"

"Yes," Kurt replies right away.


	6. Chapter 5

******Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> R.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Season One and Two  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Katie!  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 26oo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.  
><strong>AN:** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
><strong>AN2 Please read:** This is part of an update of three chapters together so please make sure you've read chapter 4 first!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 5<strong>

Kurt shouldn't be enjoying this so much, but it's not every day that he gets to have a warm bath. On the first night that Kurt stayed at Dave's apartment, he really wished he could take a long, relaxing bath when he spotted Dave's large bathtub. Kurt only had a crappy shower at his place, and the hot water didn't last more than ten minutes—If he's lucky.

But he wasn't going to ask Dave if he could take a bath. Kurt was the hooker in this scenario, and he assumed that it wouldn't be proper for him to ask his client if he could use his bathtub.

Though, when Dave walked into the bathroom where Kurt was waiting for the clean towels he was bringing him, Dave saw him gazing at the tub longingly, and he told Kurt that he could use it.

"Oh, no! It's fine. I'm okay with taking a shower," Kurt lied, and he was sure Dave saw right through him.

"C'mon, I won't mind."

Kurt bit his lower lip. He really wanted to, but it felt wrong.

"Maybe if you join me," Kurt suggested coyly, thinking he could make this bathtub thing a part of his act. He never shared a bath with anyone, but he didn't really feel weird about the prospect of doing so with Dave.

Dave's eyes lit up for a second, but then he looked quite uncomfortable. "I already took a shower and I'm also a bit sleepy. So it's all yours."

Kurt sighed, frustrated. "It's a bit selfish for me to take a long bath all by myself when you're paying me to be here, David."

Dave rolled his eyes. "What's the big deal? I'll probably fall asleep at any moment. You don't need to entertain me or anything, even if I am paying you. So take a bath, I'm going to sleep for awhile, okay?"

Kurt didn't even have time to retort as Dave already handed him the towels, walked towards the tub, turned the faucet on, and left. Kurt pressed his lips together, mad at Dave, but then he smiled when the thought of being able to take a soothing bath filled his mind. And it _was_ Dave's idea, after all. Dave made him do it so it wasn't like Kurt was being a bad whore. He only did what Dave asked him to.

So, Kurt smiles to himself as the tub fills. The steam starts filling the room and knowing that hot steam is good for the lungs, he inhales and exhales deeply. He's quite chipper and he knows he shouldn't be. He's also quite sore, but he was expecting this after the sex he just had.

Meeting a second time with Dave was much easier than the first time. There was no awkwardness or uncertainty. Sure, when Dave opened the door to greet him they shared a few of seconds of awkward silence, but as soon as Kurt stepped inside the apartment and Dave shut the door behind them, they were all over each other in an instant. Kurt wasn't given much time to feel self-conscious about anything.

The sex was just as amazing as the first night, and Kurt was starting to get used to being able to come without having to jerk himself off. Kurt really believes that this is how sex is supposed to be.

To bad he's learning about it right now, under these circumstances.

Kurt checks himself out in the mirror, enjoying how the room is getting hotter. The mirror is steadily becoming fogged with steam, but Kurt can still appreciate the bite marks and hickeys on his neck. He knows he should have asked Dave not to leave marks on him; it was mortifying for him, having to ask his workmates at The VIP to cover his bite marks with make-up before his performance, and for more than one night. He could conceal the ones on his neck, but it was impossible for him to put make-up on the ones on his back.

He couldn't strip in front of everyone with those marks in his back! And his co-workers did help him out, after making fun of him. They would poke fun and scoff, saying, _'I didn't think you were into rough sex, Babyface! But no worries, we'll cover all your love bites, you dog!'_ Kurt wasn't used to people making fun of the sexual aspects of his life; at least, not in a good way.

Kurt sighs. Apparently, he's going to have to go through that embarrassing situation once again.

The bathtub is almost filled, and Kurt wonders if Dave has salts or some sort of scented bubble bath. He doubts that Dave has any, but it won't kill him to see if he does. It's not like he's able to have a bath like this every day, so he wanted to try to make the most of it.

Kurt opens the counters under the sink first, and he finds nothing but normal commodities that most men have: cologne, an electric razor, a couple of small towels… Clean t-shirts? Kurt frowns. This is a weird place to keep clothes. Kurt continues his search and only manages to find extra toilet paper, shampoo and conditioner, and soap.

Almost resigned, Kurt decides to try the mirror cabinet. Kurt only finds a tooth brush, toothpaste, and a bottle of Hugo Boss. _'Nice,'_ Kurt thinks to himself, smiling. '_So that's why Dave smells so good all the time…'_ But then his smile fades when his eyes fall upon numerous pill bottles

Kurt takes one of them and reads _Prozac_. What? Why would Dave have Prozac in his cabinet? The knot in his throat only worsens when he reads the label and sees Dave's name there. These pills have been properly given to Dave by a shrink.

He takes the other bottles, all of them with Dave's name on the label, and he finds that Dave is also taking something called _Topamax_, _Xanax_, and also _Tegretol._ Kurt puts all of them back in the cabinet before removing his underwear and climbing inside the tub.

He's not feeling so joyful anymore. The hot water embracing him feels _incredible_, though, and Dave's bathtub is so big that Kurt has a hard time believing it. Nevertheless, Kurt turns the faucet off, and in the solitude and silence of the steamy bathroom, he can only think about the man that's presumably sleeping in the next room.

Kurt knows what _Xanax_and _Prozac _are, so he assumes that the other two are psychiatric drugs as well, and that leads him to the obvious question: Why is David taking all of that? And it's not like he's a junky, stealing prescription pills since they all have his name in the label, so that only means that there's a doctor—a _shrink_—who believes that it is necessary for Dave to be taking all of those drugs.

Kurt lies down in the tub, sinking down until the water reaches his chin, as he thinks about what could possibly be wrong in Dave's life. They don't talk much—usually only what's necessary—so they definitely don't share a lot of the personal aspects of their lives to each other. But Dave has a great apartment, money, and a possibly a good job—or at least one that pays well if Dave can afford so much stuff. So why is Dave taking antidepressants and anxiety medication?

Well, probably because he's suffering from depression and an anxiety disorder and… Something else… Kurt isn't sure what the other two pills are for. Dave doesn't look like he's depressive. Dave doesn't look like he's sad. He's quiet, but Kurt is quiet as well. Kurt doesn't know how Dave acts when he's with people the who aren't _him._

But still, he worries, and he hates himself for that. There's obviously something wrong in Dave's life, and he wonders a lot about him. Does this have something to do with Dave's homosexuality? Maybe Dave is not accepting of himself; maybe he didn't change much since high school. But those are things that Kurt doesn't know since, from what he gathers, Dave may or may not be out. There's nothing that indicates one way or the other.

So Dave's issues could be related to his sexuality, if Dave is still in the closet. But if he's out, then that would mean that Dave's issues go beyond that.

Kurt is curious now and it's frustrating since he knows he can't exactly ask Dave. They don't know each other and the only reason why Kurt is there is because Dave pays him to be. He's Dave's hooker, so it's not his place to ask him _'Why do you have prescription pills in your cabinet?'_ He isn't being paid to be nosy.

And Kurt shouldn't be worrying about Dave. He has plenty of things to worry about, like the fact that he has lessthan ten days to gather a couple of hundreds in order to reach the monthly payment for his medical bills. He also has to go to the drugstore, since he's running out of his Ventolin and he has to buy a new one.

Kurt tries to relax and enjoy his bath, even if it seems impossible now. Why did he have to be so nosy? He's perfectly capable of enjoying a bath without scents and bubbles; he's enjoying it so far, so why did he open Dave's stupid cabinet?

Even if it's not the relaxing bath Kurt anticipated, he enjoys the hot water around his body while his mind is filled with thoughts of Dave. Then the water starts turning cold, and he steps out of the bathtub. After Kurt cleans the whole bathroom—he didn't make a mess but he wants Dave to find the bathroom as if he didn't use it—and puts some clothes on, he walks into Dave's bedroom to find him fast asleep on one side of the bed. Kurt suddenly wonders if Dave always sleeps off to one side, or if he was just leaving room for him.

He carefully gets in the bed, trying not to wake Dave up. Dave's sleeping on his side and Kurt watches him closely.

He looks peaceful in his sleep, and it pains Kurt somehow. He shouldn't worry about David Karofsky, his former bully. But it's weird because ever since they ran into each other at The VIP, they still feel like they're complete strangers to one another, even if they did share some history together. Almost.

But Dave doesn't behave like he did in high school, and Kurt has to assume the same about himself. They hardly ever mention their past, and they don't even talk about the present. It's a weird feeling. Even though Dave bullied him when they were teens, Kurt can't manage to hate him today. They're too much like strangers to one another, but Kurt can't think about Dave as a stranger even if they don't know anything about each other. And instead he uses this ambiguous detachment in his favor, since he could easily give a damn about what happens in Dave Karofsky's life.

Yet, Dave is sleeping next to him and he's a man who Kurt has crossed paths with at some point in his life. And Kurt is still looking at him as though he was able to learn more about Dave just by staring at him.

Kurt carefully runs the back of his fingers over Dave's cheek. "Why are you so sad?" Kurt whispers, and Dave stirs.

Kurt quickly pulls his hand away and Dave blinks repeatedly until he opens his eyes. He stares at Kurt.

"Hey," he says sleepily. "Enjoy your bath?"

He can't push aside the curiosity and the worry, but he's quickly learning how to act like the hooker Dave's paying for. So Kurt smirks playfully. "I did. It was very relaxing."

Dave smiles lazily, closing his eyes again. Kurt realizes that he doesn't get to see Dave smile a lot and he realizes that he likes this smile. Kurt keeps on growing worried. For some reason, he feels the urge to do something for him and he shouldn't. Kurt certainly doesn't owe anything to Dave, and it's not up to him whether Dave's happy or not.

He's only here for the sex; sleeping with Dave is literally the most he can do.

And for the first time, Kurt really wonders what the hell he's doing here. Dave seems to be a good catch. He has a great apartment and apparently a good job. He's amazing in bed and even if Dave's far from looking like how Kurt's ex-boyfriends looked, Kurt has to admit that Dave's very attractive.

'_Note to self: Reconsider your taste in men'._ Kurt thinks to himself, believing he could use that advice for when he's in shape to start dating again, if that ever happens.

Why does Dave need to pay for a hooker? Dave could have a boyfriend, a lover, or maybe some acquaintance to have booty calls with every now and then. It doesn't matter if Dave's out or not; Dave went to The VIP and he's clearly familiarized with gay sex, so he could have a boyfriend, or a secret lover, or one nightstand if he's still in the closet.

What's going on in Dave's life?

Kurt suddenly feels useless and he doesn't even know why. He can't do much for Dave, and he's not even sure if there's something to do for him, but the belief of Dave being sad, or depressed upsets Kurt, and he wants to do something about it. Anything.

He's not even thinking when he wraps an arm around Dave, pressing himself close to him. Dave immediately holds Kurt back, and Kurt feels so stupid… He's a hooker. Who wants hugs from a hooker? He can't comfort Dave with hugs…

…But he can do it with sex.

Kurt knows he can't fix anything with sex; in fact, it wasn't until he started having sex with Dave that he discovered that sex could be something mind-blowing and that he could be somewhat good at it. But even if sex doesn't fix anything, you can at least feel good for a little while.

So Kurt presses his mouth against Dave's, initiating a slow and sensual kiss. Thankfully, in spite of his sleepy state, Dave kisses him back. His hand finds Kurt's hair and he runs his fingers through his hair at the back of his head. Kurt moans into Dave's mouth, growing hard as Dave's other hand slips down his back to cup his ass, pulling Kurt tightly against him. Kurt wraps his leg around Dave's waist, crushing their growing erections together.

"Fuck, yes," Kurt breathes out and arches his back when Dave buries his face in the hollow of his neck, sucking the sensitive skin there.

While he ravishes Kurt's neck, Dave pushes him onto his back, getting on top of him and Kurt starts letting himself being drifted into pleasure.

Kurt loves how much pleasure Dave subjects him to every time he fucks him. He loves how Dave makes him feel when they fuck, and Kurt is a hundred percent sure that Dave likes to fuck him. So Kurt can't fix Dave, but he'll give himself to Dave as much he can. Dave can, at least, have something to distract himself from his—presumably—depression, and Kurt gets something good from this as well.

They both win. Kurt never gets to feel this good, and if Dave is in a similar place but for different reasons, Kurt is able to resolve their problems in a way that enables them to both feel good, at least for a while.


	7. Chapter 6

******Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> Nc17.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression. Breath play.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Season One and Two  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Katie!  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 96oo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.  
><strong>AN:** I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
><strong>AN2 Please read:** This is part of a three chapters together update, so please make sure you've read chapters 4 and 5!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 6<strong>

It gets complicated.

Dave is aware that this thing with Kurt was meant to become problematic, but he can't do anything to prevent it.

Even though Kurt spent the night with him last Monday (he actually left yesterday morning) after another awkward moment of paying Kurt for his services, Dave asked him if he was free on Wednesday. Dave knew Kurt was free, since he remembered how Kurt told him that the only days he didn't work at the club were Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays. But Dave just needed the confirmation; he needed Kurt to tell him that he was available for him.

But it goes beyond the sex. Dave is worried about Kurt, and he feels he needs to help him somehow.

There are a couple of things that worry him the most, asides the fact that Kurt fucks men for living. He can't do much about that, so he wants to focus on other matters.

In spite of it being almost impossible to not think about how freaking hot Kurt is every time they fuck, he does notice how incredibly skinny Kurt is. How could Dave not notice that? He can feel Kurt's bones right under his flesh everywhere Dave touches him.

So Dave could do something small. It's not like he's getting too involved with Kurt, but he it couldn't hurt to invite him to have dinner. Just because Kurt is his hooker, every now and then, doesn't mean they only have to have sex. They spend a long time together, since it's not like they have sex once Kurt gets to his apartment and then leaves. Kurt stays with him all night long.

Instead of going straight to bed, Dave could ask Kurt if he wants to eat something. It can't be that hard, and Dave can bet that Kurt will probably say yes, judging by how skinny he looks.

But, as he's waiting for Kurt to arrive, Dave's nervous because there's food in his fridge. Not a lot, but he always tries not to have food in his fridge. It's not like he always eats everything that's around him, but he's on a strict diet and he doesn't want to fall in temptation.

So, his fridge that is usually filled with some diet sodas, a couple of beers and maybe some fruit now held chicken tika masala, vegetable samosas, Kashmir pillaw, and plain naan. Dave hopes Kurt likes Indian food; Ghandi Indian makes the most delicious dishes, and that place has been responsible for more than one of Dave's binges, so he'd know that.

He's not going to be tempted by Kurt's food though, since he's not going to eat Kurt's food. It's obvious that Kurt needs to eat much more than he does. If anything, Dave should stop eating for once. But usually, there's not this much food inside his large fridge and Dave feels a little uncomfortable about that.

Luckily, the doorbell rings. Well, not his doorbell since Kurt's in the entrance of his building, but Dave rushes to the entry phone, letting Kurt in. Kurt arrived just on time so Dave stops thinking about the food in his fridge. If everything goes according to his plan, that food will be later in Kurt's stomach, which is his idea.

It doesn't take Kurt to long to reach his apartment, and Dave smiles slightly when he opens the door to him. Kurt smiles back, stepping inside.

"Hey you," Kurt greets him, kissing him on his lips.

Dave immediately wraps his arms around Kurt's waist, kissing him back.

If there's something good about this, it's that after seeing each other a couple of times, they are both more comfortable around each other. Or so Dave thinks, since it feels that way.

When he's slowly sticking his tongue inside Kurt's mouth and they start kissing each other quite sensually, Dave remembers that they can't go to bed straight away. So he breaks the kiss, and he still has Kurt around his arms when he asks, doing his best to sound casual. "Are you hungry?"

Kurt stares at him for a few seconds saying nothing, but then he smirks. "Of course I am," he replies with a flirtatious tone of voice, playing with Dave's shirt. "And you happen to be quite yummy."

Dave snorts, because he's far from being_ yummy,_ but Kurt's is just being a good whore and because he's a whore, it's obvious that Kurt's not getting Dave's point.

"I mean _hungry_ hungry. Like food hungry, not sex hungry," Dave explains and now Kurt stares at him, as if he's still not getting Dave's point.

Kurt shrugs, frowning a bit. "Why do you ask?"

Dave must remain casual. Kurt doesn't have to realize that he's trying to feed him, because not only will he be letting Kurt know that he worries or cares about him, but also because there was a chance that Kurt could take offense.

So Dave shrugs as well. "Oh, I've just ordered a lot of Indian food, and it's really good. I just thought you'd like to try some. Did you have dinner already?"

"No, I was too tired so I took a nap, but-"

"So try it. It's really good, promise," Dave assures him, since ha! He was right and Kurt is obviously skipping meals. But then he realizes that maybe he's being too insistent and that could look suspicious. "Only if you want to, of course."

Kurt keeps on staring at him, being obviously not sure about this. "Okay?"

Dave nods, forcing himself not to show the achieved smile he'd be showing if he wasn't trying to look like he didn't plan to make Kurt have dinner. "Cool. Get yourself comfortable, I'll go to reheat it."

He hurries to the kitchen, taking the food out of the fridge and quickly putting everything into the microwave.

His eyes are fixed in Kurt, since he can see him taking a seat through the window in his kitchen. Kurt doesn't look very comfortable doing this, and Dave starts feeling a little upset about making Kurt eat. What if Kurt's is a freak like him and doesn't like to eat in public? Kurt would be doing it just because Dave is paying him to be here and probably to do what he says and…_ Lord_, Dave would die if someone forced him to eat in public.

"You don't have to eat if you don't want to," Dave tells him, feeling a little worked up because of his own thoughts.

Kurt looks up, meeting his gaze. He's already sitting at the table, but he shrugs, still smiling at him. "It's okay. I just didn't expect we were going to have dinner," he says.

Dave's blood turns cold.

Kurt thinks he asked him to have dinner _with him._ So Kurt is not a freak like Dave is, and being just a normal and sane person. Kurt has no reservations about eating in public but… That's not how this was supposed to happen, since Dave is on a diet and he's not supposed to eat. Plus, he never eats in front of people, and the idea of Kurt watching him eat makes his stomach flip.

He can't blame for Kurt being surprised at this, since he's a hooker. Surely none of his other clients want him for anything other than to have sex. But still...

"Um… I'm not going to eat," Dave tells him, doing his best not to sound as troubled as he's feeling.

Kurt frowns. "How come?"

"Er... I've already had dinner," he lies.

Kurt stands up and walks towards him. Kurt doesn't go into the kitchen, though. He just stands at the other side of the wall, resting his arms over the window's frame, staring at him.

"You're not going to have dinner with me?"

The microwave beeps and Dave turns around to get the food and to distract himself with something. If he's not mistaken, Kurt sounds a little disappointed.

"Well, I'm not really hungry."

He catches Kurt's eyes looking pretty interested at the food he's carrying when he rests the plastic containers on the kitchen counter. But, when he's about to grab a plate, Kurt speaks again.

"Don't. Just put it back in the fridge, I don't really feel like having dinner," Kurt tells him apologetically, and Dave's face falls.

"What?"

Kurt smiles, shrugging. "I just don't like to eat alone. I mean… I live all by myself, so I do eat alone, but that's because no one's around. It's weird to do it when I'm not alone though."

"But-" Dave cuts himself off. Kurt wanted to have dinner, and he hasn't eaten before so he must be hungry. He already accepted! God, Dave hates himself.

"It's okay. I don't mind. It's just… It would be awkward to be there sitting all by myself eating all that when you'd be… I don't know, next to me doing nothing? And you're not hungry so I won't force you to have dinner with me."

And Kurt is doing nothing but showing a polite smile, a bit apologetically also, as if he's feeling bad for making Dave reheat food he's not going to have now.

His plan almost worked. Almost.

"You should really try this. It's really good," Dave assures him.

Kurt continues to smile. "So you've said. Maybe some other time."

But Dave realizes that there won't be any other time because Kurt won't eat by himself if Dave is there, so how can Dave offer him food? He cannot eat in front of Kurt. He can't eat in front of anyone, let alone Kurt.

He can't tell this to Kurt because he'll think he's a freak… Or maybe not. Kurt doesn't ask questions; probably because he's not supposed to. After all, he never asked Dave why he chooses not to take his t-shirt off every time they have sex.

"So, you'll have dinner if I have dinner with you?"

Kurt laughs quietly. "David, really. It doesn't matter."

He'll break his diet if it's necessary. Hell, he breaks his diet almost twice a week for no reason, so if he has to do it to get Kurt to eat something, he'll do it.

"I'll have dinner with you," Dave tells him without breaking eye contact.

Kurt narrows his eyes at him, but there's still a smile on his face. "You don't have to. You're not hungry, and honestly I'm not hungry either."

"But you haven't had dinner."

Kurt sighs, looking a little frustrated. "I work a lot, okay? So if I have to choose between resting and eating, I usually pick resting," he tells him, sounding annoyed.

Maybe Dave is making a huge deal out of this; it's not like Kurt looks starved, even if he could use a few good pounds. A few pounds being more like twenty or thirty.

Dave stares at him, defiantly. "I said this food was good, alright?"

"Yes, like fifteen times already."

"Well, maybe seeing this made me want to have some," Dave retorts, stubbornly motioning the food in his hands.

Kurt rolls his eyes. "Whatever. Do you need some help with that?"

"No, you just go and have a seat," Dave replies since he's the host. Well, not the _host_, but something like that. "Oh, wait. Take this," he says, walking to his fridge and getting a couple of sodas. He hands them to Kurt, along with two glasses.

Kurt turns around and goes back to the table, placing the sodas and the glasses on the table because obviously, as any other normal human being, Kurt expects Dave to sit at the table with him since they'll be having dinner together. In the meantime, Dave puts the food on plates, trying to figure out how he's going to tell Kurt that he won't be sitting at the table with him—that he doesn't like people watching him eat—without sounding like a massive idiot.

Then he realizes that there's no way to say this without looking like a freak. Hopefully, Kurt won't give him a hard time about it.

That being his fate, Dave takes both plates and walks towards the dinning room. He places one of the plates in front of Kurt, takes a soda, and holds on tightly to the little dignity he's about to loose.

Kurt stares at him, saying nothing.

Dave sighs. "This is going to sound ridiculous one way to the other, so here it is: I won't be sitting at the table with you."

Kurt winces. "I'm sorry if I'm making you-"

"It's not you, it's me," Dave cuts him off, feeling beyond stupid. "I don't eat in front of people. I don't like people watching me eat."

Once again, Kurt stares at him, saying nothing.

"Go ahead, laugh," Dave says, since this is the first time he reveals this piece of information about himself to someone other than his therapists. He always avoids eating in front of people, so it's not like he ever had a chance to explain why he does it. He simply does it.

But Kurt doesn't laugh. "That's ridiculous," he says, sounding bitter.

"I know."

"If you don't want to sit at the table with me, I think you could have come up with a better excuse."

"What? It's not an excuse."

"I get it. It's not like a lot of guys want to have dinner with a _whore_," Kurt spits out, and Dave wants to kill himself. "But you asked me to, remember? So please, if you-"

"It's nothing like that! Jesus, Kurt!" Dave cuts him off, pissed off at himself and this stupid situation. "It has nothing to do with you being a hooker or not," he explains even if he hates having to point that out. "Yes, it has to do with you because you're people, and I don't eat in front of people."

Kurt's eyes are fixed into Dave's, looking mad. "So you're telling me you never eat in front of people."

"Yes, that's what I'm telling you."

"So you never invite someone to have dinner with you," Kurt states, skeptically.

"No. If you mean, like, asking someone out, I always go for a coffee or a drink," he tells him, even if it's mortifying. Dave doesn't want Kurt to believe he has an issue with him being a hooker.

"How about work? Don't you ever have those fancy lunches?"

Dave rolls his eyes. "If you want to know, then yes. But I always make up some excuse to skip them. And my workmates actually have lunch together, but I never join them. I eat by myself."

Kurt's angry face starts softening, but he still looks at him suspiciously. "Thanksgiving? Christmas?"

Dave shrugs. "At first I faked being sick, but then I skipped a few by travelling around. Then it got to a point where I couldn't avoid it anymore, so I told my parents. I sit with them during dinner, but I don't eat until after they go to bed. They don't like it, but fuck it. So now you see it's not because of you."

Kurt says nothing and Dave knows that look: He's feeling sorry for him. Dave presses his lips together, unhappy and mad with this situation. Not only will he have to eat, but he's made a fool of himself. Why does he even have to explain this to Kurt? He's just a hooker, and he would be the first person to be disgusted by watching him eat anyway.

"Are we done? Will you eat now?" Dave inquires, bitterly.

Kurt holds his head high and Dave smiles to himself since it's been far too long since he's seen Kurt do that. "Where are you going to eat?"

At least Kurt is not asking him why he doesn't eat in front of people, so Dave is more relaxed now. Dave points at the living room. It's an open concept apartment, so the living room is right next to the dining area. He has a coffee table, so… Kurt follows Dave's finger with his eyes and quickly moves to another chair; he sits with his back to the coffee table.

"Thanks."

Kurt nods quietly. "Can we speak as we eat, or do we have to eat in an uncomfortable silence?"

Dave lets out a small laugh, marching towards the living room. "Yes, I don't mind as long as you don't look at me."

Just in case, Dave sits on the floor with his back facing Kurt as well. With them being back to back, the chances of Kurt staring at him while he's eating are minimal. But once he's on the floor and he's facing this plate full of delicious food, Dave feels nervous. He's not supposed to eat this; this is far from being on his diet. He's broken his diet plenty of times and with worse than Indian food. But still… Kurt is just a few feet away from him and Kurt is Dave's biggest reminder that he needs to lose some weight.

A moan coming from Kurt's mouth interrupts Dave's train of thoughts.

"Jesus, this is really delicious," Kurt says, making Dave smile. "What is this?"

"Which one?"

"The chicken. Is it tika masala?"

It's Dave's favorite. "Yup."

Kurt lets out another content sound. "It's been ages since I've had Indian. This used to be my favorite."

"Glad you like it," Dave says, meaning it. He takes a deep breath before having the first bite. _'You'll take care of it later.'_ Dave tells himself.

He tries to stay positive because Kurt is there having his favorite kind of food. Kurt is enjoying himself, and who knows how often he skips his meals. Kurt said he works a lot and that he prefers sleeping to eating, so Dave assumes he doesn't eat much.

Yet, Kurt said he worked all day long, but tonight he has his day off in the club. Does Kurt have a second job? A job like the one he has at the club? Dave's not sure if he should ask Kurt or not. They are supposed to talk about something, but how can he without asking personal questions?

"So… You worked today?" Dave asks, casually.

Kurt groans. "I did, sadly."

"I thought today was your day off. I didn't want to bother you," Dave says, now eating his food without any qualms. Lord, he's such a pig.

"It doesn't bother me, David. And yes, I have my day off at The VIP, but I have another job so..."

Dave chews the chicken slowly, processing the info. "Another job, like… You know…"

"Oh, God. _No._ You mean, like… This one?" Kurt asks, sounding embarrassed.

"Well, yeah."

"Then no. Completely different job," Kurt explains and Dave realizes that he really likes the little noises that Kurt makes when he eats.

"Oh. What is it?"

"_So_ not telling you," Kurt says, with his mouth full.

Dave didn't expect that, but maybe he's asking too many questions. "Sorry. I was just trying to make conversation."

Kurt sighs. "It's just embarrassing. _Loser_ embarrassing, not _hooker_ embarrassing," he says, almost amused, and Dave is glad and saddened simultaneously at Kurt being able to laugh at his horrible job.

But then, Kurt starts talking about food and the differences between Indian, Thai, and Vietnamese, and dinner turns into something more amicable. They don't talk about anything personal, and the conversation flows smoothly.

Dave is done with his dinner when Kurt asks if he can turn around. Dave appreciates him for that, and it turns out that they finished eating at the same time. Dave picks up the dirty plates and decides not to do the dishes today.

When he walks out from the kitchen, Kurt is right there, staring at him. "Something wrong?"

He swears that he can see Kurt blushing. "Can we not have sex right away?" Kurt asks, sheepishly.

Dave frowns. What's with that question? "What?"

Kurt looks troubled, and suddenly he groans. "I'm sorry. It's my fault. I shouldn't have eaten so much. I can't even remember the last time I ate that much," he says, and Dave feels slightly upset about that. It's not like Kurt's place was loaded with food. That's too much for Kurt? Does he even eat? "It's just, I'm really full and-"

Dave laughs. "It's okay," he cuts him off. "I feel the same way, so don't feel bad."

"It's not like we won't be doing anything," Kurt hurries to say. "Just for-"

"Hey, slow down. Everything's cool, alright? Why don't we just… Chill and watch something on TV?"

He's improvising since he's in no shape to have sex right now. Most of the food he ate feels like it's stuck in the back of his chest.

"Okay. That would be nice," Kurt says. "Living room or bedroom?"

"Which one you prefer?"

Kurt doesn't answer. "I don't know. I asked you first," he says, quietly but firmly. "I'm here to do what you want, David."

Dave presses his lips together. He wants Kurt to feel comfortable. Why can't he pick where to watch TV? It's not a big deal. He doesn't like the fact that Kurt feels he's there to do what he says, but Kurt wouldn't think different since he's a hooker, and, in all actuality, Dave is paying Kurt to be with him.

"Bedroom," Dave resolves, since there's nothing better than watching TV in bed.

Kurt doesn't seem happy or bothered by it; he simply nods and heads to the bedroom and Dave follows him. Before Dave has chance to say anything, Kurt begins to strip off his clothes until he's only wearing a tee and his underwear.

Kurt catches Dave staring at him. "What?"

Dave shakes his head quickly. "Nothing," he lies. Dave was expecting them to lie down and watch something together, but it seems that Dave forgets that Kurt's his whore and not his date or his boyfriend.

At least Kurt didn't get fully naked.

Kurt gets under the blankets, and Dave strips down as well, and just like Kurt did, he gets in the bed wearing only his underwear and the t-shirt that covers, at least visually, his huge belly.

Kurt snuggles against him when Dave turns the TV on, and that affection catches him off his guard. Still, Dave wraps an arm around Kurt and Kurt rests his head on his shoulder. Dave reminds himself that Kurt is only being attentive with him; Dave is paying him to be there, so it's not like Kurt would depreciate him or something.

It's a nice feeling, though. Having Kurt in his arms and not precisely having to fuck him, since it's Kurt's job. It feels nice.

"What do you want to watch?"

"Dave, as I told you before-" Kurt starts, sounding slightly annoyed, but Dave cuts him off.

"Hey, I never know what to watch. I just leave the TV on, not really paying attention to anything."

Kurt snorts. "Then why do you even turn it on?"

Dave shrugs. "I live all by myself. It makes me feel I'm not alone."

"Didn't think about it that way."

"So, you like something in particular?" Dave inquires, doing some channel surfing.

"I don't watch TV."

Dave frowns and stares at Kurt who stares back at him. "Want me to turn it off?"

Kurt smiles at him. "I don't have a TV, so I don't really watch anything."

It's not like not having a TV is terrible. There are plenty of people who simply don't have a TV because they don't like it; Dave himself is not fan of television. But nowadays, a TV is almost like an appliance. And judging by the little he could gather from Kurt's current situation, Dave guesses that Kurt is not the kind of person who doesn't like to watch TV, but either can't afford one or couldn't see a reason to buy one since he's in a constant state of working and sleeping.

Dave doesn't want to make of this an awkward moment. "I guess you're not the sport type."

Kurt laughs quietly. "I'm not, but I wouldn't mind if you-" Dave changes channels, leaving all ESPNs behind. "Well. I won't mind if you want to watch some game."

They end up watching Friends' re-runs, which is okay with him because Kurt doesn't seem to mind. Kurt even laughs from time to time, and Dave joins in, finally relaxing. But not very long, since the knowledge of the food he ingested when he wasn't supposed to starts hitting him.

He tries not to think about it because he's comfortable in his bed with Kurt wrapped up in his arms. Yet, even if he's not feeling physically ill like he does when he has one of his binges, the mere awareness of the food that shouldn't be in his stomach starts making him nervous.

What's worse is that he can't just stand up, march to his bathroom and throw it up all.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asks, breaking the silence.

Dave blinks, keeping his eyes fixed on the TV so he can avoid Kurt's gaze. "What?"

"You seem tense," Kurt says, running his hand softly over Dave's chest.

Dave shakes his head dismissively. "It's nothing."

"Really? You're suddenly ten times tenser now that I asked," Kurt notes, now running his hand over Dave's arms.

And Kurt is right. The idea of all that Indian food makes him nervous and so does the fact that he cannot get rid of it right now. And the fact that Kurt is noticing that Dave is having issues again doesn't help him any. Dave doesn't want Kurt anywhere near his relationship with food.

"Just… Some stuff at work," Dave lies.

Kurt chuckles, taking the remote out of Dave's hand and turning the TV off. "I'm doing a terrible job here," he says, staring at Dave with flirtatious eyes. Kurt climbs on Dave's lap, bending over to kiss him softly on the lips. "Want me to help you to forget about work?"

Kurt grinds his ass against Dave's crotch and Dave moans, holding Kurt tightly by his hips. He's not thinking about work but about the food and his weight, and he feels so mad at himself for that. He hates Kurt for being there, making it impossible for him to go to the bathroom and get rid of all the food he shouldn't have eaten in the first place.

But the pleasure does cloud his mind and Kurt is insanely hot. "Fuck, yes," Dave groans, and Kurt smirks at him.

Dave pulls off Kurt's tee, revealing his pale and perfect chest. Dave runs his hands all over Kurt's chest and then he pulls him down for a hungry kiss. Dave can never get enough of this; of Kurt. The two times that Kurt spent the night with him, they fucked three or four times each night, and never has Dave accomplished such a feat.

But he loves making Kurt come and writhe in pleasure. Dave's nothing but a fat loser that Kurt would never want, but he's the one that gets to make Kurt squirm in delight every time they fuck.

And Kurt is already moaning into his mouth. Dave's hand runs down Kurt's chest, all the way to the hips, and he squeezes Kurt's hipbones knowing that, for some reason, it seems to turn him on. The effect is instantaneous: Kurt groans. His hot breath hits Dave's face heavily, and Dave smirks to himself.

Dave rolls on top of Kurt. Kurt immediately hooks his legs around Dave's waist, and he can feel Kurt's erection pressing against his crotch. He realizes that he's never sucked Kurt off, and _God…_ Why he hasn't had done that already?

"God, Dave," Kurt moans faintly. "I want you so bad."

Sometimes Dave doesn't know if Kurt is just acting, since he supposes that all hookers say things like _'You're the best I ever had,'_or _'the biggest'_ or even _i/ 'the hottest'_, and Kurt has never said any of those things. Kurt does encourage him while they fuck, but Dave knows how much Kurt enjoys their sex sessions considering how hard he comes every time they fuck.

Yet, even if Kurt is saying stuff as if he had a script, Dave won't let him down. Kurt wants him now, so Dave quickly decides that he will have to blow Kurt later.

Dave moves to get the lube, but as soon as he removes himself from on top of Kurt, he is hurrying to take off his own underwear while pulling Dave's down to fist his cock.

"Oh, shit," Dave moans as Kurt strokes his him. His hands tremble, and he almost drops the lube and the condom, but removes Kurt's hand from his cock, sitting over his heels and spreading Kurt's legs in front of him.

"I'm hard enough already," Dave tells him, and it's the first time they don't turn off the lights to fuck.

He notices how Kurt's eyes are focused in on his cock, and his mouth is slightly open. For a second, Dave grows a bit self-conscious.

"I can see that," Kurt says quietly.

Dave fidgets in his place. "Something wrong?"

Kurt snorts, grinning like a fool. "It's the first time I actually get to_ see_you… Looks as big as it feels."

He doesn't know how to take that. Is it a compliment or a critique? Kurt, being a hooker, has probably seen cocks of all sizes and colors. Dave's aware of the fact that he isn't small, but he surely doesn't have the biggest cock ever.

"Is it bad?" Dave asks, unsure.

Kurt stares at him, almost amused. "Bad? You call that cock _bad_?" And Dave is expecting Kurt to come out with the cliché hooker phrase _'that's the biggest I've ever had.'_

Dave shrugs, and Kurt only stares at him, still amused. "That cock gives me the best orgasms, so there's definitely nothing_ bad_ about it."

Dave rolls his eyes, a bit relieved since, huge or not, he knows that he is able to get Kurt off when they fuck, and that's what matters the most. "Turn around," he tells him, feeling anxious to put his cock inside Kurt's ass, but he knows he can't just _do_ it.

Kurt keeps on giving him those sexy, subtle looks that drive Dave insane, and he gets on his hands and knees, offering his ass to him. Dave quickly applies lube to his fingers and immediately starts probing Kurt's entrance. Kurt arches his back, burying his head in the pillow and sticking his ass up even higher.

Kurt's going to be the death to him.

He can't help stroking his own cock as he fingers Kurt's ass, growing painfully harder as Kurt grunts and moans, swinging his hips rhythmically to meet Dave's thrusting fingers. It drives Dave crazy; even if Kurt enjoys having sex with him (Dave is able to make him come repeatedly so there's no doubt in that) he's surely putting on an act.

Kurt is not the same as he was the first time they fucked; Dave understands. Kurt fucks strangers—people who don't know who he used to be. Dave is sure that it must have been very uncomfortable for Kurt to have him as a client. At first, Kurt was hesitant and almost shy from time to time, which would be an atypical behavior for a hooker.

Kurt seems obviously more at ease with him, and now Dave assumes that he acts the same with him as he does any other client—displaying a lot of enthusiasm to ensure that he doesn't disappoint.

Dave shakes his head quickly because this is not the best time to be thinking about what Kurt does with other men. Kurt is with him now, and Dave will do his best to pretend that he is driving Kurt as crazy as Kurt does for him.

"C'mon, Dave," Kurt moans, and that is all that Dave needs.

He rubs the head of his cock up and down Kurt's ass, and with one long, hard thrust his cock is completely inside Kurt. Kurt gasps loudly, but then practically purrs, pushing his ass against Dave's hips, and Dave's about to lose it. He still gives Kurt a moment to get used to the intrusion. Dave bends over Kurt, wrapping an arm around his slender little torso, and he runs his tongue over the back of Kurt's neck, making him shiver. Dave applies a series of wet kisses on Kurt's shoulders, biting him as well, and Kurt arches his neck, turning his face to his side to meet Dave's lips. They kiss slowly, but lustfully, until Kurt starts wiggling his hips.

Dave gets the hint right away and straightens up, holding Kurt by his hips.

"Fuck me… Hard," Kurt breathes out. Dave's cock gets harder if that's even possible.

Since the first time they had sex in the club, the last thing that Dave wants is to hurt Kurt, so no matter how appealing Kurt's offer sounds, he's not sure if he indulge in his request right away.

"Are you sure?"

Kurt mewls like a cat in heat. "Yes, David. _Please._"

So be it.

Dave begins to thrust into Kurt, bringing his cock all the way out before driving it relentlessly back in. Kurt squirms and moans, and Dave feels like he's about to explode already. It's only been two days since the last time they had sex, but, to him, it feels like it's been ages. He feels deprived and the only thing he needs is to fuck Kurt hard and fast until they both come.

He fucks Kurt's ass as hard as he can, and the bed starts moving beneath them. Dave pays no mind to the headboard that is repeatedly hitting the wall in time with his thrusts. He digs his fingers into the flesh of Kurt's hips, and he feels Kurt tremble in ecstasy.

"God, fuck yes!" Kurt groans and Dave smirks.

Kurt swings his hips fast, meeting each thrust; Dave bites his lower lip hard and closes his eyes in order to concentrate on not coming right that second. He continues ravaging Kurt's hole, hard and deep, feeling stronger with every thrust. Kurt keeps on moaning, and Dave loves hearing him like that.

He needs to watch him though. Dave feels the urgent need to see Kurt's gorgeous and hot face, so he takes his cock out of Kurt's ass, making Kurt hiss.

"Dave!" Kurt complains. "What-"

Being in a hurry, he just throws Kurt on his back, and Kurt lets out this content groan when he lands on the bed. Dave is used to rough sex, and sometimes he worries if he's being too rough with Kurt; not a lot of guys like being manhandled. In addition, Kurt looks small and fragile, so Dave worries sometimes. But then again, Kurt seems to like this treatment, and maybe it's because he's a whore and he's used to this, or maybe he really likes it.

And every time Kurt does stuff like this, like groaning when he's being manhandled in bed, or when Dave digs his nail in his hips, or when Dave's biting him… Dave feels like he's on the edge of losing it.

Dave spreads Kurt's legs open and holds him by his thighs, pulling his ass against him, and enters him again. Kurt arches his beautiful neck back in pleasure, wrapping his legs around Dave's waist and Dave starts thrusting into him hard. Unable to resist the distance, he bends over Kurt, attaching their mouths together. Kurt kisses Dave forcefully, tugging at his shirt as though he was trying to rip it off, but thankfully Kurt's unable to do such a thing.

Kurt gasps inside Dave's mouth each time Dave pushes his cock deep inside his ass. Kurt breaks the kiss, arching his back again in pleasure as he moans, and Dave bites his jaw and neck. Kurt's hard cock is brushing Dave's belly, so Dave fists it, pumping it in the same rhythm of his thrusts.

"Oh, fuck! Dave!" he screams, shaking his head. "No, don't touch me," he whines.

Dave quickly removes his hand from Kurt's cock, startled. Kurt looks at him, and gives him a wicked smile. "I just don't want to come yet," he tells him, and Dave sighs relieved since he thought he was hurting him.

As Dave rides him for all he's worth, Kurt pants and moans beneath him; Kurt's legs are wrapped around Dave's waist, pulling him deeper. Then Kurt hesitantly reaches Dave's hand, locking their fingers together. Dave smiles at himself at the moment of closeness, but then Kurt timidly pulls Dave hand up to his neck, wrapping Dave's fingers around his neck.

Dave's mouth runs dry and his cock suddenly feels like about to explode. It's his ultimate kink, but he can't just choke anyone. It's scary for some people, so you at least need to know that person and be able to trust them.

It slipped from Dave once, the first time Kurt spent the night with him; Dave couldn't hold it and he put his hands on Kurt's neck. Thankfully, Kurt didn't mind nor did he find it odd, but Dave forced himself not to do it again. He didn't want to scare Kurt off, and he thought that Kurt would have forgotten about it by now.

But Kurt is staring at him with almost sheepish eyes, holding Dave's wrists, guiding him; Dave's fingers are pressed against Kurt's slender, elegant neck, asking him to do it again.

And Dave can't control himself. He gently presses his fingers against Kurt's throat at first, and Kurt closes his eyes, showing a fainted smile, throwing his head back. Dave keeps on slamming his cock inside Kurt's ass, making him grunt and, encouraged, Dave applies more pressure on his throat.

"God, yes," Kurt says, almost breathlessly and Dave starts losing it. But he doesn't want to.

He's not thinking straight, and Kurt, doing this to him, is driving him nuts. He's afraid he could hurt or scare Kurt. Even if Kurt is a hooker, Dave doesn't know how much experience Kurt has with choking, and Dave doesn't want to do anything stupid. So he releases his hands from Kurt's neck, to focus only in their fucking but Kurt lets out a weird annoyed sound.

"No, Dave," Kurt pants heavily, catching the air that he wasn't having seconds before. "I'm so close, please," he says, reaching down to grab Dave's hands and brings them up to his neck again. He forces them against his skin and holds them there, practically using Dave's hands to choke himself, and they continue to fuck.

And with that, Dave is far gone to stop anything. He can't say no to this, especially when he's about to have the most intense orgasm in his life, so he grips Kurt's throat hard. Kurt releases Dave's hands and shuts his eyes, fisting the sheets. Not even a single breath comes out from Kurt's mouth or nose; he stays very still, letting Dave fuck the hell out of him. Dave is close, but he doesn't want to come first and he can't reach Kurt's cock to jerk him off.

"Dave," Kurt gasps weakly, and Dave is about to release him, thinking that he's really hurting him, but Kurt tightens his long legs around him, drawing him in deeper. Dave takes the hint and slams his cock hard and deep inside Kurt, over and over, holding Kurt's neck with the same amount of strength until he feels Kurt's legs shaking around his waist. The muscles of his ass clench hard around Dave's cock and Kurt comes in a shuddering climax.

Kurt groans and grunts, unable to say a word and being impossibly close, until his body spasms violently beneath Dave, and Dave lays over Kurt, feeling Kurt's come wetting his shirt. He continues thrusting into him viciously and holds Kurt's neck until he comes hard inside his ass.

"Fuck! Fuck! _Fuck!_" Dave growls, as his body shakes and every cell of his body constricts in the most intense sexual pleasure he has ever experienced up to this point.

Dave releases his grip from Kurt's throat and Kurt starts panting desperately and tiredly, startling Dave; with the last strength he has, Dave holds Kurt by his chin.

"Take deep and long breaths," he commands, panting himself. "It's worse is you breathe fast," Kurt stares at him with glassy eyes and his face completely red, but he nods, and does what Dave says. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," Kurt replies, trying to gain some air. His legs still rest feebly around Dave's waist, and guilt comes over Dave like nothing before.

Dave kisses Kurt softly in his cheek, jaw, and then in his abused neck, murmuring a thousands 'sorry's' and Kurt throws his arms around Dave. Kurt cups Dave's face with his hands, kissing his lips softly.

"What are you sorry for?"

Lord, Kurt looks completely beaten. "I hurt you, right? I shouldn't have… Why did you ask…?"

"Hey, that was like… The best orgasm I've ever had in my life," Kurt tells him with a raspy voice. "Second time I come without touching myself," he says, like he's proud. "That was really incredible."

Dave carefully pulls his cock out of Kurt's ass, and they both hiss at the same time. Even if he's sore and exhausted, Dave gets up from his bed and heads to the kitchen.

"Dave? Dave, where are you going? What happened?" he hears Kurt's calling and another pang of guilt hits his stomach. Dave quickly fills a glass with water and returns to his bedroom, to find Kurt sitting up in his bed with a worried face.

"Water." Dave offers the glass to him. "For your throat."

Kurt blinks, and then he gives Dave a small smile. "Thanks," he says, taking the glass of water and downing the entire thing.

Dave returns to the bed, and Kurt leaves the empty glass on the bedside table before snuggling against Dave. Dave holds Kurt close, feeling completely drained; he can't fall asleep yet. He has to at least change his tee.

"I cleaned myself already, but you need to change that shirt," Kurt points out, slightly amused, almost reading Dave's thoughts.

Dave snorts. "I know. I'm sorry, okay?"

Kurt chuckles, and looks up at him. "I told you not to be sorry," he tells him, and then he looks away, blushing. "I sort of asked for it," he says and then none of them say a word. "You're like… Into this?"

Dave shifts in his bed, a little uncomfortable. This is Kurt. Hooker or not, he spent a good amount of his teenager years crushing on and worshiping him. Kurt probably thinks very little of him, but he really doesn't want to keep looking like a freak.

"I'm sorry," Kurt breaks the silence, at the lack of answer from Dave. "Not my business, I guess. Though being a whore,_ yours_ for the matter, the kind of sex you like is kind of my business."

He finds it hard to read into Kurt's tone, since Kurt sounded inviting, friendly, harsh and annoyed all at once. Dave has no freaking clue how Kurt can do it, and not knowing if Kurt is annoyed at the lack of information that Dave gives away, or if he thinks that Dave doesn't want to talk to him since he's just his whore, or if Kurt's only trying to be friendly and not to make him feel bad for having some kink. All of this could be fixed by doing completely different things, and since Dave doesn't know what Kurt wants from him, it's not like he can't provide him with anything.

Dave shrugs, as Kurt gets himself more comfortable to sleep. Kurt's surely assuming that they are done with this conversation—probably at the sudden awkwardness that fell upon them both. Dave can't blame him, but maybe it's better this way. He finds it hard, sometimes—or more like all the time—not knowing what to do next when Kurt's around.

It's so freaking hard to please Kurt that Dave can't even stand himself. Dave can please Kurt sexually, which is good and at least he's pleasing Kurt in an economic way since Kurt charges $70 per guy that gets to fuck him, and Dave gives him much more.

The main issue is that he shouldn't even be worrying about _pleasing _Kurt, because, in all actuality, Kurt's just a hooker Dave's paying to fuck.

It's not that simple though, and it doesn't end there either. Even if he wants to be detached from Kurt, he probably noticed that he's attracted to him somehow; even in the way a client is attracted to their hooker. They haven't seen each other in years. They hated each other –well, Kurt had to hate him, for sure—and Dave just sees him and fucks him, and then practically begs him to spend a night with him. In addition, this is the third night they spent together in two weeks. Unless Kurt believes that Dave fucks hookers on a daily basis, Kurt has to have noticed that Dave does want him—him exclusively—around for whatever reason.

And Dave doesn't even know what that reason is anymore.

He still has no clue what does he feel for Kurt. He knows how Kurt makes him feel though: Insecure, self-conscious, and afraid. Kurt is far from being the flawless human being he was when they were attending McKinley, but now, a flawed Kurt still has the ability to make him feel incredibly small and unworthy, even without having to do anything. Kurt's mere existence makes Dave feel small when he's by Kurt's side.

Kurt makes him nervous, but that's Dave's fault because Kurt doesn't really do anything to him: Kurt doesn't look at him funny or treat him badly. Kurt never says anything nasty to him, or makes any remarks about his looks or anything for the matter. And that's probably because he's a hooker. Dave assumes that Kurt isn't about to start criticizing his clients.

Kurt just does what Dave says, almost, since Dave's the one who's paying and Kurt's job says that he has to please the guy who's paying him.

And Dave is choosing to literally be next to the guy who makes him feel so small and unworthy. He's not an insecure or dumb guy, at least not generally speaking. He has had boyfriends, has gone in plenty of dates, and picked up plenty of guys, and yet every night he spends with Kurt, it's like Kurt's the first guy he's picking up in his life. Or at least it feels that way until they finally get to bed and start fucking.

Kurt's around, and Dave feels the same way he felt back in high school and, although he's okay with his sexuality now, Dave just feels dumber, fatter, and uglier than he usually does.

The only moment when Dave is at peace with himself is when he's fucking Kurt, and that's because he has the certainty that he's doing something right; even if he doesn't do it properly, since normal people get naked to have sex and Dave can't manage to take his tee off. Not while having sex—nor ever—let alone in front of Kurt.

He pleases Kurt, though, but Kurt spends the entire night with him, and there's only so many times you can fuck in the same night. The in-between sex time drives Dave insane—and not in the good way.

When he's not feeling exposed or self-conscious (which is pretty much whenever Kurt was around) he worries about Kurt, and that's the worst part; the worrying. It took Dave years to fall out of love from Kurt, and he's not in love with Kurt now. At least Dave's sure about that. Loving Kurt was painful back then, and Dave is not hurting as much now as he did back then.

_Yet._ There's a fine line between worrying and caring, and as if the world wasn't already against Dave, Kurt has plenty of reasons to cause Dave to worry about him; things that somehow seem to be threat Kurt's wellbeing. And it's not Dave's business, but the more he thinks about Kurt, the more obsessed he gets. Soon, he'll find himself thinking about Kurt 24/7 and then the worrying will turn into caring. Dave won't be thinking about the all of the things that could make Kurt suffer; he'll be thinking solely about Kurt, regardless of anything that could harm him. He'll grow attached, and he'll have affection towards him, and then Dave will be fucked.

Thinking about Kurt will be as pleasant as it will be hurtful.

In spite of everything, Dave wants Kurt around. It's nice for a change, to have someone around. It doesn't matter if Kurt's existence makes him feel like he's worth the dirt in his shoes. He wants Kurt there, and from time to time, Dave lets himself feel as though he achieved something, since he did get Kurt Hummel into his bed, one way or the other.

And it's damn complicated; Dave saw it coming and he still went for it.

Dave doesn't want to grow attached to Kurt, but he still worries about him. He doesn't intend to get Kurt to like him, but Dave still cares about what Kurt thinks of him. Dave doesn't want to seem too concerned in regards to Kurt. He doesn't want to look weak or like he actually wants him, but Dave does his best to make Kurt feel comfortable and at ease around him. And fuck… Dave just_ feeds_ him and gives him great orgasms. Dave feels guilty when he inadvertently rejects Kurt, either by not talking to him, or by not answering his questions, since it seems to upset Kurt. No freaking client would be so considerate towards their hookers. Kurt is surely the first to know this.

In the end, it doesn't matter if it hurts. It seems that Dave is just a masochist because he's doing nothing but exposing himself more and more to the person for whom Dave suffered for the most, knowing that he'll suffer again.

Dave can't manage to escape from this because this is Kurt, and apparently he guy is his biggest weakness; just like he was back in high school.

Kurt starts whistling softly; Dave got used to that sound and it means that he is asleep. Kurt always emits that sound when he's sleeping, but now Dave thinks about the choking. God, the choking! He wasn't supposed to let Kurt know about that.

Kurt was right. As his hooker, he should do whatever Dave wanted in order for him to get off, but Dave can get off without letting others know he's a freak. And maybe Kurt has seen a lot of weird sex because of his job, but Dave is still trying not to look bad in front of him. He's not sure if Kurt is into breath play, but he seemed to like it and he didn't know if it was Dave's thing; after all, Kurt asked him if it was his thing.

Dave is doing a very lousy job at not getting attached to Kurt, and at not falling into temptation; even sexually speaking now.

All these thoughts start to make his head hurt, and his stomach growls. The food is there; Kurt did a good job at making him forget about his 'work' troubles. Sex made Dave forget about the food he ate when he wasn't supposed to, but now Kurt is sleeping next to him and that issue comes back, full force.

The anxiety makes him grow ill, so he carefully gets up, trying his best not to wake Kurt, and rushes to the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

All the thoughts about Kurt overwhelm him; his insecurities become even more unbearable at the knowledge that Kurt is right there, just a few feet away from him. In addition, there's a huge dinner still inside his stomach making him feel sick; he's sick and disgusted with himself.

He's sweating cold, out of nowhere, and he grows nauseous: Dave bends over the toilet, resting his hands on its cold edges, and almost retching without any effort, but he's so desperate to get rid of this sickness, his nervousness, and the burden he feels on his shoulders and inside his stomach, so he sticks his fingers inside his mouth and the gag reflex hits him right away.

In the following second, he's emptying his stomach and it's as painful and as uncomfortable as it always is. He's aware that he shouldn't be doing this, and he hates himself for having to do it, and even _for _doing it. Every time he forces himself to do this, is like a lost battle. He's a loser and he's failing, but underneath all that, he feels relieved; even at the aching of his throat.

"Dave? David, are you okay?"

Dave opens his eyes wide as he hears Kurt's concerned voice on the other side of the door, but once he starts throwing up, the reflex itself keeps on kicking in and he can't manage to stop. He's not even forcing himself to throw up, at this point.

Every time he gets to closing his mouth, he retches again, throwing up again and fuck, did he eat that much? He's such a fat pig.

Kurt walks in and Dave can't do anything to stop him; still, Dave's back is facing Kurt, so he waves his hand so he won't come closer. The last thing that Dave wants is for Kurt to see him like this, let alone to know what Dave does.

Thankfully, Kurt doesn't come closer but Dave knows he's there until finally he stops throwing up. The acid taste in his mouth is horrible, but Dave is used to it. He quickly flushes the toilet as his legs grow weak, and he kneels on the floor until he's sitting.

"God, Dave, what happened?"

Dave has his eyes closed, but he senses Kurt moving around and hears the water running from the sink. Before he can even notice, Kurt is kneeling in front of him, pressing a wet towel over his forehead.

"Talk to me," Kurt tells him, sounding concerned and Dave feels like the worst scum on earth. "Did the food make you ill?"

"I'm fine," Dave whispers tiredly. "Just stomach ache," he lies.

"I can make you some tea," Kurt offers him, and finally Dave opens his eyes.

Kurt is there, on his bathroom floor right in front of him, looking genuinely concerned. Kurt's nursing his self inflicted sickness, and Dave feels beyond guilty for that. He doesn't want to worry Kurt because of this.

Dave quivers a small smile, just to let him know he's fine. "I'm fine, Kurt. But thanks."

"Are you sure? I could-"

"Really, Kurt. I'll just brush my teeth and go back to bed."

Kurt's brows are knit in concern, but he nods. They both get up from the floor and Kurt even stays there next to him, rubbing his back while Dave brushes his teeth. It really makes Dave feel like shit.

Kurt walks close to him as they head back to the bed, and while it's weird having someone pampering him like this, Dave keeps on growing uncomfortable. He would probably appreciate having someone take care of him if he was really ill, but this is Kurt taking care of him, and Dave is not ill.

"Kurt, I'm okay," Dave assures him, when they both get into bed and Kurt literally tucks him in.

Kurt chuckles as he snuggles up next to him. He rubs his hand over Dave's stomach in soft circles. That touch causes Dave to tense, and he swallows hard, saying nothing. Now Kurt's feeling up his fat? This is clearly not his night. Dave lets him though, since he doesn't want to be rude by snapping Kurt's hand away from there. After all, the guy is almost nursing him.

"What? You're feeling sick, it's nice having someone around to take care of you," Kurt tells him tenderly. "I always hate being sick and being all alone."

He frowns; Kurt said that very casually but Dave can't help getting curious. "You get sick often?"

Kurt stiffens next to him, and Dave is sure that there's something about that that Kurt doesn't want to say, and with good reason since Dave is just the guy who pays him to fuck him, but now Dave is also worried about Kurt's health, aside from his eating habits.

"Just saying. No one likes to be alone while feeling ill, right?" Kurt mumbles, and Dave nods, humoring him.

He can't really force Kurt to say anything he doesn't want to say.

"I guess."

"Just tell me if you need something, alright? My tea offer still stands."

Kurt's just being a good whore. Dave reminds himself that. It's not like Kurt cares about him, since Dave's nothing but a client he hardly knows. It's nice though, even if it's not real.

"Thanks," Dave says quietly, turning the lights off.

He's still as troubled and probably more worried about Kurt than before, but at least he's feeling lighter. He'll have to figure out how to get out of this mess before it's too late, since it seems that the more he's with Kurt, the more complicated it gets.

But hooker or not, Kurt's warm body is pressed against him, and Dave lets himself find some comfort in that, at least for tonight.


	8. Chapter 7

****Title:**** About trees and empty forests.**  
><strong>Pairing:<strong>** Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.**  
><strong>Rating:<strong>** Nc17.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong>** Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression. Breath play.  
><strong>Spoilers: <strong>S1 and S2.  
><strong>Beta: <strong>Ella Greggs.  
><strong>Word<strong> Count:<strong>** 37oo this chapter.**  
><strong>Genre:<strong>** Romance/Angst/Drama.**  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong>** Pft! If I owned Glee, Klaine wouldn't exist.  
><strong>Summary: <strong>It's been five yearssince Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.**  
><strong><br>****

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 7<strong>

This 'whore' situation is going too well for Kurt's liking.

September is just beginning and Kurt hates the fact that the winter is getting closer, but for the first time in a long time, he has things other than his debts and his health to think about.

It's been almost three weeks since he and Dave first crossed paths, and two weeks since Kurt became Dave's hooker.

If Kurt's honest with himself, the only bad thing about being a prostitute is the awful moment when Dave pays him, the moment when he can't pretend they are just lovers.

Aside from that admittedly humiliating and degrading moment, Kurt can't manage to dislike what he's doing and he tries not to think about how disturbing that fact actually is.

The truth is that the last couple of years have been quite hard for Kurt. Of course he never dwells on all his bad luck, since that would depress him deeply and he can't afford the luxury of missing even one day of work. He simply doesn't have the option of staying in bed all day, moping about his shitty life. Kurt must endure it and deal with it, just like he's always done with hardships. So he leads a plain, lonely and monotonous life, working in two places he despises, doing things that he despises, all his energies focused on paying his debts, debts he incurred because his health is fucked up.

Yet, now he realizes just how badly he was doing because now he has something to compare it to - how content he feels being Dave's whore. If he stops to think about it, _that's_ pretty depressing.

So instead Kurt focuses on the fact that he needs the money.

And Kurt likes having the company of someone. True, Dave is a client, not a friend; they never really talk or share anything important, but still he likes the fact that there's someone somewhere waiting for him, someone who wants him around for whatever reason. And is not just 'someone'; Dave is attached to Kurt's old, good life and all the things about it that he misses so much. When he's with Dave, his family and his home don't seem quite so far away.

Dave wants him for sex of course, and Kurt can deal with that.

Better seeing Dave than debt collectors, or ER doctors, or nurses with shots and meds and nebulizers.

He's also enjoying this 'being a hooker' thing because it's like he's able to be another person, at least for a while. Dave doesn't know him and he doesn't know his situation.

Kurt can leave all the misery his life provides on the other side of Dave's door, and become like Vivian in Pretty Woman: sexy, playful, friendly, confident. And those are things that Kurt has never been, or hasn't been in a long while. It's almost like taking a vacation from himself.

He gets other benefits besides money and self-confidence from being Dave's hooker. Dave's apartment is always warm, and Kurt digs warm places. Dave is a bit distant, but he always treats him fine. He even invited him for dinner the last night they spent together, and it has been a long time since Kurt ate so well.

Then the sex is pretty amazing, and what's even more amazing, it's helping Kurt feel more and more comfortable with himself in the bedroom department. When he's with Dave, Kurt acts bolder, much more straightforward and much less bashful; he enjoys being seductive for Dave, as much as he enjoys feeling sexy and desired. He never felt that way before.

And Dave happens to be a very attractive guy. He looks almost exactly like he did in high school, only his hair is a bit longer now. Of course, back at McKinley, Kurt never considered his looks. Dave wasn't Dave, he was Karofsky, and Karofsky meant only nasty slurs and slushies in the hallways, or shoves against the lockers, or even forceful stolen kisses and threats.

He's not developing a crush on Dave, since Dave pays him to have sex and hookers shouldn't get crushes on their clients, but Kurt can appreciate his looks much better now. Dave's so strong and masculine that Kurt has absolutely no trouble getting turned on pretty quickly when they're together. Why did he never pick men like Dave to date? Kurt doesn't even know.

If only he could get Dave fully naked …

On top of everything, he likes surrendering to Dave's will. Maybe it helps that Dave never asked him to do anything weird, but every time he gets inside Dave's apartment, Kurt can give himself the luxury of disconnecting his brain, letting worries about work and health and money slip away, and handing control of his life to someone else; letting someone else make the decisions for him.

In addition, Kurt's discovering that he has a few kinks of his own. Like rough sex. He doesn't really know what happened to the guy he used to be, a guy who always went for soft, caring and romantic intercourse and felt awkward the whole time he was doing it.

And then there's the choking. Kurt still can't believe that something he considers so hardcore turns him on so much, but the first time Dave put his hand around his neck, blocking his air, it was like he was shoved against the greatest orgasm. At first, he was unsure if this was Dave's kink or just a happy accident. The old Kurt would never have been able to ask his lover to choke him again, but the new Kurt managed to put his need for greater pleasure above his embarrassment and he got another blinding orgasm, provided by Dave's rough thrusts accompanied by Dave's hands squeezing his neck tightly.

Kurt can't explain what turns him on so much about the choking, but he's curious and a bit excited now that he knows this is Dave's kink as well, and that Dave seems to know much more about these things than what he's already showed. Kurt doesn't feel embarrassed about his brand new preferences in sex. The orgasms are amazing, so screw his prudishness.

It's weird that someone like Dave, someone who's so good at sex, can have so many issues. Because Dave _does_ have issues. Kurt's noticed, but he does his best not to worry about it. Kurt has plenty of his own stuff to worry about. So when he heads to Dave's apartment for the third consecutive Monday evening, Kurt focuses just on the good things that staying at Dave's means.

As pathetic it sounds, Kurt likes what he has right now, he's content, and he's holding onto it.

When he arrives to Dave's, he's greeted with a slow and sensual kiss. Dave is a very good kisser, Kurt noticed some time ago. Kurt smiles at him, not only because he's supposed to be friendly but also because he's genuinely happy to see him.

"Hello, big boy," Kurt greets him, wrapping his arms around Dave's waist and Dave does the same with him.

"Hey you," Dave pecks him on his lips.

Kurt quickly notices that there's food laid out on the dining table and also the coffee table and his brows go up in surprise. "Dinner again?"

Dave shrugs, nonchalantly. "It was okay the last time, so why not? Unless you're not hungry, you don't have to-"

"Hey, it's fine," Kurt cuts him off with a smile, since Dave looked like he was getting uncomfortable. After all, Kurt is not going to complain about being offered a nice, tasty dinner.

Kurt is not sure how to make Dave understand that he really doesn't mind doing whatever Dave asks him to. Kurt supposes Dave finds it hard to ask him to do non-sexual stuff because Dave doesn't do these things with other prostitutes. Maybe Dave is treating Kurt differently since he knows who Kurt used to be. That is, presuming Dave has been with other prostitutes. Maybe Kurt is his first prostitute and he's just not sure of the 'rules'.

"So what are we having?" Kurt inquires, taking off his jacket and hanging up his bag.

"Italian."

"Oh, fancy," he muses, heading to his spot at the dining table and taking a seat. "Do you always order out?"

Dave fidgets in his place for some reason. "Cooking for yourself when you live alone seems kind of pointless."

"I like to cook," Kurt informs him, since it's something not too personal. He normally tries not to talk about himself, since he really doesn't want to let Dave know about his shitty life. "I hardly ever do it now."

And just like the last time, they start a random conversation as they eat dinner together, or not really _together_ since they are sitting at opposites sides of the room with their backs to each other.

Kurt finds Dave's issue about eating in front of people awfully strange but he doesn't ask Dave about it, since it's not his place; Kurt's just his hooker. Yet, he's aware that it's pretty odd, since it's a quirk that obviously affects almost every aspect of Dave's life, and Kurt is actually very curious about it.

He's just as curious about why Dave never takes his t-shirt off. Never. They have had sex plenty of times, and even if they get don't get sweaty and dirty, Dave excuses himself and returns to the room wearing a fresh tee. So far, Kurt has never seen Dave fully naked, and considering how hot Dave is, Kurt would really love to get him fully naked.

Honestly, Kurt really can't imagine what's under Dave's tees that could be so bad that he feels compelled to keep his torso constantly covered. Whenever Kurt touches Dave's chest and belly he doesn't feel anything but soft and tender skin; maybe Dave has horrible scars that Kurt can't feel though the fabric? That's a possibility.

They continue chatting amicably through their meal, and Kurt is feeling good. Almost too good.

"You shouldn't pamper me with delicious food," Kurt tells Dave playfully when he's almost finished his pasta. "I might get used to it."

Dave snorts. "I really don't mind, and you could use a few extra pounds anyway," he replies lightly.

Kurt's face falls.

"I guess, you're right," he says, trying to hold back his sudden anger.

There was no malice in Dave's voice and Kurt knows it was just an off-hand comment, but he feels utterly offended and humiliated. Dave's trying to _feed_ him? What the _hell?_ Kurt is well aware that he's somewhat underweight since he doesn't eat as healthy as he should, but that's his God damn problem. He doesn't live on the streets destitute, unable to buy a freaking sandwich for lunch or something.

It's not like Kurt starves himself; he's just too busy and then too tired to eat. He often simply forgets to eat. One of his doctors scolded him about this, telling Kurt he doesn't feel hungry most of the time because his stomach has shrunk due to lack of food, not because he doesn't need to eat, and considering how often he gets sick, good nutrition is very important. But when most days you work the entire afternoon and the entire night, you're life rhythm changes and when you're back home the last thing you think about is cooking something; and he can't afford organic produce, anyway. Of course, the cost of the visit to his doctor where he received this lecture about eating properly simply added to the vicious cycle of debts and working to pay them and not eating right.

So this dinner thing is just a charade that Dave goes through so he can _feed_ him? Who the hell does Dave think he is! Kurt tries to conceal his anger; it's obvious that Dave wants to pretend he's just casually buying food for the both of them.

Kurt remembers the previous night - Dave had food waiting there but insisted he wasn't hungry, so clearly the only intention behind that dinner, too, was to make Kurt eat something.

A million thoughts pass through his head. Is he just Dave's charity case? Is this why Dave keeps calling him to spend the night?

Is the sex just an excuse so Dave can give him money because he believes Kurt's too poor to even _feed_ himself? Kurt can't believe it. It's even worse than having Dave think he gets fucked by random guys in a dirty wooden booth for seventy dollars!

But Kurt sticks to his hooker act, and doesn't show Dave how furious he's feeling. He helps Dave clean the tables and after putting the plates in the dishwasher, they head to bed just like they did the previous Monday night.

Kurt does his best to relax; sex is next and at least that's pleasant, even if it's Dave's undercover way to put money in his pocket.

He starts feeling self-conscious again though. Does Dave even want him here? Dave gets off when they have sex, that's for sure, but does Dave enjoy having sex with _him_?

Dave is only pitying him. Of course he is; who wouldn't pity a hooker? Kurt would feel sorry if he found out that someone he used to know became a prostitute. That must be the only explanation for why Dave is so nice to him in bed. As far as he knows, clients are paying so _they_ can get off; they don't really care whether the hooker has a good time.

He quickly forgets about everything when Dave starts kissing him, responding instantly to his affections. His body melts into Dave's touches, and he can't stay mad when Dave starts undressing him, kissing and nibbling every part of skin he's exposing.

Kurt surrenders completely to the building lust when he finds himself fully naked on Dave's bed with Dave's rough hands roaming all over his body. Dave strokes his cock, making Kurt moan loudly, and before he even knows what's happening, Dave's hot mouth is engulfing his cock.

"Oh, fucking God!" Kurt grunts, in pleasure and in despair.

So far, in spite of having multiple rounds of sex each time they're together, there has never been blow-jobs. There should have been, since it must be the most common thing between hookers and clients, but they just have intercourse.

But this is Dave, his client, going down on him, the hooker, and Kurt's sure it should be the other way around.

Kurt fists the sheets, arching his back in ecstasy and desperation because part of him wants to tell Dave to stop, because Dave shouldn't be pleasing him since he's paying him, but the other part is too far gone in bliss. It's been ages since the last time someone sucked Kurt off, and Dave's doing a really amazing job. The way Dave presses his lips around his cock, while he runs his tongue all over the underside as he bobs his head up and down... Kurt can't even stand it.

He's going to come very soon.

He's still angry, though. Why is Dave doing this to him? Kurt doesn't want his pity! Kurt doesn't want Dave giving him money, or buying him food, or giving him great orgasms because he feels sorry for that sassy fashionista he used to be who fell so disgracefully.

Dave is giving him money for sex, and Kurt can't even earn it by pleasing Dave!

Dave grunts and moans around Kurt's cock and by the way that Dave's moving, Kurt knows Dave's touching himself. They both build to their orgasms, and in a matter of seconds Kurt comes fast and hard, not having time enough to warn Dave. Dave doesn't seem to mind though, since he continues sucking his cock all the way through his orgasm, swallowing his cum while Kurt's body spasms violently on the bed.

Kurt's still writhing when Dave removes his mouth from his cock, just to moan as he comes himself by _jerking himself off._

As he slowly starts recovering from his orgasm, Kurt doesn't feel any less mad. On the contrary, he feels even angrier because he's whoring himself to someone who pity fucks him! Seriously, who does Dave think he is? Kurt doesn't need him, or his money, or his food, or his sex.

He hates himself for letting himself feel good around Dave, and enjoying Dave's stupid food, and paying his bills with Dave's money, and falling into bliss with the incredible orgasms Dave provides him.

They have full sex again, just a few minutes after the blow-job incident, and Kurt forgets again about his anger. But while he's recovering from his second incredible orgasm of the night and Dave is caringly covering him with sheets and warm blankets – the bastard - Kurt pretends to be very tired, turning his back to Dave, and fakes sleep just so he doesn't have to deal with Dave's stupidly handsome face.

Kurt is indeed quite tired, but his thoughts don't let him sleep. He thinks about this whole arrangement for what seems like forever, which is actually a full hour according to Dave's alarm clock. Dave seemed to have fallen asleep long ago, but then Kurt feels Dave move in bed. Then Dave actually gets up from bed and Kurt shuts his eyes, remaining very still so Dave won't figure out that he's still awake.

Kurt hears Dave quietly head to the bathroom, silently as if he was trying not to _wake him up_, and close the door carefully behind him.

Kurt sighs in relief once Dave disappears from his sight. The tangle of thoughts from before are just starting to mess with his head when the sounds coming from the bathroom startle him: Dave's throwing up again.

Concerned, Kurt quickly sits up and debates whether to run to Dave's aid or stay in bed. He's mad at Dave, but Dave is sick again, so he should probably go to see if he needs something.

But he's mad at Dave, and that weighs more right now. Kurt is only his whore, not his nurse. He gets ten times sicker and deals with it all by himself, so he's sure that Dave doesn't need a hooker to rub his back while he throws up.

Kurt stays in bed, but it's impossible for not to cringe while he listens to Dave obviously emptying his stomach. He finally relaxes a bit when he hears the toilet flushing and then the water in the sink running. He quickly lies back in pretended sleep mode, and Dave exits the bathroom, moving as silently as before.

Kurt has to fight the urge of asking Dave if he's alright, at least. Dave might be ill, since it's the second night that he's throwing up and it's been almost a week since the last time that happened. Well, at least that Kurt is aware of.

Yet, Dave doesn't sound sick. He returns to the bed not making a sound. Kurt hears him sigh, and then nothing.

Kurt frowns since that's not how sick people act; Dave just got up like nothing happened, threw up and came back to bed, still like nothing had happened?

_Oh, fuck no._

Everything hits him in a half-second: Dave's quirk about not being able to eat in public and how Dave refuses to get fully naked, and now he's throwing up, again, without really being ill, or at least not looking like he's ill. Is Dave… _bulimic_?

Kurt's blood turns cold, and he quickly dismisses those silly thoughts because the idea is ridiculous. Dave's a handsome grown man, not an insecure teenage girl. Dave can't be bulimic.

But then, Kurt remembers all the pills in Dave's cabinet and realizes that obviously Dave's not completely okay with himself. Is it possible that Dave has an eating disorder?

Kurt wants to dismiss it as a stupid idea, but the more he thinks about it, the more convinced he is. It can't be just coincidence that Dave refuses to eat in public. Is that a way of denying himself food? Lord, the last time they were together, Dave claimed not to be hungry and only ate just to make him eat. Did Kurt _force_ him to eat when he didn't want to?

Now Kurt feels guilty.

He can't comprehend it, though, and he doesn't want to believe it. Dave is beyond handsome; Dave's hot, so how can he not like the way he looks? Does Dave believe he's fat? Kurt is aware that Dave is not a thin man, but he's hardly huge. He's big and strong, and yes, he has a few extra pounds, Kurt has touched Dave's belly and he's sure there's not a solid six pack underneath that shirt, but Kurt can't imagine this makes Dave self-conscious about his appearance. Kurt actually likes the way Dave looks, and he wouldn't change anything about him.

How can Dave do this to himself? Kurt knows what bulimia is; God knows he's read ER pamphlets on all sorts of diseases and disorders while killing time waiting for the doctor or nurse on duty. He jokes that he's learned so much about diseases he could pass a med school entrance exam.

Kurt feels suddenly sad and worried and hopes he's wrong about Dave. He carefully turns around, still pretended to be asleep, and snuggles up against Dave's warm body.

"Did I wake you?" Dave asks, sounding slightly worried.

Kurt faux sighs. "You got up?" he asks, faking oblivion because he doesn't want to let Dave know he was awake or Dave will realize that he heard him.

Dave fidgets in his place and Kurt starts believing that maybe his assumptions are correct. "Yeah, I had to pee. Sorry if I woke you up," he says, remorseful but nonchalant at the same time. "Let's get some rest, alright?"

In spite of the darkness of the room, the moonlight illuminates Dave's small smile; it breaks Kurt's heart, but he still smiles back. Instead of saying he was sick and threw up, Dave just lied and said he had to pee. Dave obviously didn't want Kurt to know what really went down in the bathroom.

Kurt is still incredibly mad at Dave, since with or without an eating disorder, Dave is making him feel very bad about himself. But now, Kurt worries about Dave.


	9. Chapter 8

******Title:**** **About trees and empty forests.****  
><strong>Pairing:<strong>** **Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.****  
><strong>Rating:<strong>**** Nc17.****  
><strong>Warnings:<strong>** **Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression. Breath play**.  
><strong>Spoilers: <strong>**S1 and S2.**  
><strong>Beta: <strong>**Ella Greggs.**  
><strong>Word<strong> Count:<strong>** **1o3oo this chapter.****  
><strong>Genre:<strong>**** Romance/Angst/Drama.****  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong>** **Pft! If I owned Glee, Klaine wouldn't exist.**  
><strong>Summary: <strong>**It's been five yearssince Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.****  
><strong>**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 8<strong>

Tuesday is a terrible day for Kurt.

He wakes up coughing; his throat itches a little and his nose is slightly runny. Kurt's gotten sick often enough to learn to read his body's signs. He immediately goes to the bathroom and takes the bottle of vitamins out of his cabinet, just to find that there are only two pills left. Kurt groans but pops one in his mouth, hoping that he'll be able to at least push the flu forwards – please God let it be just a flu - that he knows he'll soon catch.

The bad thing is that he has to buy more vitamins.

His shift in Metfood is more dreadful than usual, mostly because for some reason the credit card system goes down for an hour and a half, and since he's the one behind the cash register, all the customers who suddenly have to pay with cash they don't have vent their irritation on him.

Princess texts him in the middle of the afternoon, asking if he can replace Bren tonight since the boy has a pretty big exam tomorrow and asked for the day off to study. Kurt's supposed to be off tonight, but he's aware that Bren attends community college and he thinks it's admirable that the boy is trying for a better future.

Kurt wastes no time telling Princess that he'll be there. In addition to wanting to help his co-worker, Kurt's going to fall ill, either this week or the following one, and he'll have to skip some days at work, losing lots of money. Kurt was looking forward to a night's rest, but he's got to plan ahead and that means pushing his body now if he has to.

Because of the credit card problem, his very tedious shift at Metfood goes over-long. He misses the bus and subway connections on his way to The VIP and his mood starts turning bitter.

Kurt still arrives at work before midnight, which is usually when the place gets crowded. "Crowded" isn't really accurate. Kurt has worked on Tuesdays before and it's never a very busy night. One glance around the club and he can tell this night in particular seems to be pretty lousy.

There are lots of tables unoccupied, and while waitering, Kurt lands only two lap dances that are not even private ones. His strip number is set for 2 AM again, and before Kurt goes behind stage to dress up, he notices that there are not a lot of people, so he won't be getting good tips.

As he dresses up, Kurt does his best not to feel bad, reminding himself that he's still getting extra money for the extra hours he's working.

The performance goes awfully wrong though, and not just because of the bad tips. He's dancing around the pole when a drunk guy climbs on stage, just to grope and try to dance with him, and the small audience cheers to egg the guy on.

Some of Kurt's co-workers invite people from the crowd on stage during their performances, or have no issues when it happens spontaneously, but everyone knows Kurt is not one of those guys, so at his obviously uncomfortable state, Crank –their bouncer - gets on stage as well, just to push the drunken guy off. But in spite of being substantially smaller than the bouncer, the drunken guy offers a lot of resistance and in their sudden struggle, Kurt is accidentally shoved and hits his face hard against the pole.

He's dizzy and his face throbs. Crank gets way madder, and kicks the drunk customer not only off the stage but also out of the club. In the meantime, some of Kurt's co-workers who were waiting the tables and witnessed the whole mess hustle Kurt to the changing rooms backstage.

They practically drag him into a seat and immediately start nursing his face; even Princess comes into the dressing room to check on him, and Kurt feels grateful to have co-workers who are so caring. Celine and Jack - both of them bears - are the most attentive and quickly get ice for him while they all curse the drunken customer, and then Kurt spends the following half-an-hour with the ice pack pressed against his cheek.

But the show must go on, or not really, since Kurt doesn't resume his performance for obvious reasons. Instead, he stays the rest of the night behind the bar with Princess, preparing drinks, which is still some money but means no extra cash for lap dances. But Kurt's face aches quite a lot, so he's hardly in the mood to dance in anyone's lap. Actually, he's never in the mood to do such a thing, but he won't be able to pretend he likes grinding some stranger's lap when he's in pain.

He returns to his apartment early in the morning as usual and smiles for the first time when he puts his daily two dollars in his Stove Fund jar. He's every day closer to his goal, and that knowledge always helps him to get through the day. He sometimes contemplates the idea of putting in some extra money instead of sticking to the daily two dollars, since some days he can afford to put in maybe two dollars more. He doesn't do it though, because he knows himself and if he puts in more money today, he won't put in any tomorrow if his economy is tight, promising himself that he'll make it up later, and that's a slippery slope to failure.

This is a steady routine he can keep, so he decides to stick to it.

Kurt's getting ready to go to bed when he hears pained screams coming from his neighbor's apartment and he rushes outside, alarmed. Chantal and even the stoned musician are already in the hallway, and they knock the door of the young couple.

Cody opens the door, looking completely pale as if he's about to faint, and leads them to the bedroom where Haley is holding her big belly, screaming in pain, sitting on their bed that's covered in blood. Thank God for Chantal, who takes charge of the scene and assists the young girl who's obviously in labor, while Kurt dials the 911.

It's a very stressful situation. There's so much blood that Kurt fears Haley is going to lose the baby; Cody is panicking, which makes him completely useless, but Chantal has experience with this, being a mother of five children, and she instructs Haley on how to breathe so when the contractions occur the girl handles them better.

They all stay with the young couple until the ambulance arrives, and then Kurt returns to his apartment completely exhausted, while Chantal stays to clean up Cody and Haley's apartment.

He can't help feeling bad for those kids – and he shouldn't think of them as 'kids' since he's probably not even five years older - not only because it seems the birth is going to be difficult, but also because of the money they'll probably owe when it's all over.

Kurt very much doubts they have any health insurance, and even when you do, you can still end up paying enormous amounts of money since policies usually don't cover everything. Kurt has some experience with that, sadly.

And he's very familiar with hospital costs, so when he saw the ambulance arriving he was thinking about how much that's going to cost to them, since ambulances are not free, and how expensive giving birth to a baby in a hospital must be. He hopes they won't have any complications, not only for Haley and the baby's sake, but also because complications are way too expensive. Kurt knows a new life is about to come into the world and he shouldn't be thinking about that in money terms, but it's impossible for him not to since medical bills are what got Kurt where he is now.

After a messy afternoon, a horrid night and a hectic morning, Kurt manages to get only four hours of sleep. He wakes up moody and tired and what's even worse is that his face keeps on throbbing. When he heads to the bathroom to brush his teeth, the first thing he notices when he looks into the mirror is that although his cheekbone is only slightly swollen, there's a gigantic purple bruise adorning his pale skin.

Kurt curses under his breath. At least he still has the make-up he bought to cover the bruises he got while having sex with Dave, so he does his best to cover his bruise since he has to get ready for work and he's also seeing Dave tonight.

His shift at Metfood is monotonous and that only gives him more time to think about all the things that went wrong yesterday, and a little about Dave. It's impossible not to think about him since Kurt's seeing him tonight; and he's feeling bitter in general, so he's not as content about going to Dave's place as he was the last time.

Kurt doesn't think about Dave's supposed eating disorder; his horrid day only reinforces Kurt's idea that Dave must be treating him nicely, giving him money and feeding him out of pity. The truth is that Dave doesn't know squat about his life, but still, Dave seems to have these fixed assumptions and that makes Kurt so mad that he can't even stand Dave. Or himself - with his horrid job where guys get all sleazy with him, and his other job where costumers are jerks to him, and his bad diet, and being a lousy whore whose client only fucks him as compensation for his shitty life.

He really doesn't want to face Dave right now.

Yet much later in the afternoon he finds himself on the metro on his way to Brooklyn. His phone starts ringing and it's Dave. Kurt's been traveling through the city for the last hour after a long day of work, so Dave better not cancel their meeting or Kurt's going to be really pissed.

"Hello?"

"Kurt, hey… um… where are you?" Kurt rolls his eyes, since Dave sounds somewhat uneasy and it seems that Kurt will indeed have to turn around and go all the way back home.

"On the metro. On my way to your place," Kurt states, slightly annoyed. "Why?"

"Listen, I'm still at the office. I was wondering-"

"Want to reschedule?" Lord, Kurt can't believe his bad luck. Honestly, he's having the worst week ever, and coming from him, that's saying a lot!

"No, no, no," Dave hurries to say. "I still have to stay for a little longer, there's this big thing we have to get done today. It won't take me more than twenty minutes to get home, but you'll probably arrive way before me."

Kurt clenches his jaw. "So I have to wait for you _on the street_?"

It seems that he's about to be demoted from hooker to street walker; maybe Dave wants to pick him up on some corner under a lamp post to get the full effect?

"No, not at all! I mean, I was thinking I'll call the building manager, he lives in apartment 1-C, and he'll let you in the front door. There's a spare key for my apartment hidden in the wall lamp by my door. It's easy to find if you know it's there. You could wait for me? I'm sorry to do this to you, but-"

"I'll wait for you," Kurt cuts him off, because in spite of being moody and feeling quite angry with Dave right now, he really doesn't want to turn around and go back home. He's way closer to Dave's apartment to than his own, and it's getting dark as well.

"Good. Great," Dave tells him, sounding relieved, and Kurt rolls his eyes again. "I'll call my manager to let him know you'll be arriving soon. He lives on 1-C, alright? I'd do my best to get back soon, but it might take me an hour more. When I get home, we'll order some dinner or something."

God, Dave really knows how to push his buttons! "That sounds great," Kurt lies. "See you."

"See you soon, and I'm really sorry for the inconvenience."

They both hang up and Kurt's mood doesn't get any better. Now Dave's going to feed him again and really, why a person with Dave's issues with food believes he has the right to do something about Kurt's diet! Is Dave going to have dinner with him only to sneak out later and throw it all up?

Fuck, how can Dave do that to himself? Kurt knows and deals with horrible health, but he can't control it and it kind of pisses him off that Dave is willingly hurting his own body. Deep down, Kurt is aware that if Dave is bulimic for real, he's as sick as Kurt is, but just in another way. Yet Kurt is so mad that he can't really process that. The only thing that Kurt is thinking right now is that he can only _wish_ to be healthy, but Dave _is_ healthy and purposefully makes himself ill. Can't Dave appreciate what he's got?

When Kurt reaches his metro station it hits him that he really doesn't want to hear Dave throw up tonight. Kurt is about to fall ill soon, he can feel it; he knows his body and its signs and maybe not this week, but probably next week. It always scares him to fall ill, and not only because of the money he loses when he's sick, but also because it has happened to him before, when what seems to be just a flu or a cold develops into something more serious.

So he really doesn't want to listen to Dave making himself ill.

Kurt's walking down Forster Avenue and has an idea. He'll cook something for Dave instead of ordering in. He'll prepare a meal with lots of care and effort so maybe Dave will feel a little guilty about wanting to throw it up.

Kurt walks into the store, checking how much money he has in his pocket, and after matching up recipes he remembers with what the store has that he can afford, he leaves with a bag filled with ingredients to prepare herby chicken goujons with crispy new potatoes as a starter and spicy prawn and chickpea curry for dinner.

The manager of Dave's building is a friendly old man who lets him in without any fuss and Kurt has no trouble finding Dave's spare key. It feels odd to be inside someone else's apartment without them, but he doesn't waste time considering how much he misses Dave's welcoming kiss. Instead, he starts cooking their dinner immediately so he can have most of it ready before Dave arrives.

It's been a long time since Kurt cooked like this and it relaxes him somehow; while he's focused in chopping and stirring, he puts aside all the things that are currently making him feel miserable and angry and thinks only about making a tasty meal.

His stomach flips though, when he goes to throw out the trash and finds not one, not two, but three cake boxes in Dave's trashcan. A part of him hopes that Dave held some kind of party not long ago, but he knows that this is probably the product of a binge and he feels as sad as he feels angry.

How can Dave do this to himself?

He disposes of the trash and tries not to think about that. The food is around ten minutes away from being done when Kurt hears Dave entering the apartment.

Dave's wearing a suit again and Kurt knows now that he works at some office, but when he sees Dave smiling at him, looking so freaking good in his suit, the image of the three cakes hits his mind and he can't believe it. He has to fight the urge to start shaking Dave violently to make him come to his senses.

Kurt's still in the kitchen when he greets Dave, and Dave looks surprised to see him there with the whole cooking display.

"Hey, yourself," Dave approaches him, taking off his jacket and kissing Kurt on the lips. "What's all this?"

Kurt works hard to act friendly and he turns around to take care of the food, since it's still not done. "Well, I thought about surprising you," he tells him, which is true. "Anyway, a home cooked dinner is better and healthier than ordering food, don't you think?"

Dave peeks over his shoulder and Kurt can see that he still looks surprised and a bit troubled. "You didn't have to do all this, Kurt. And you bought all this stuff? You didn't have to spend money on this."

Kurt chuckles nonchalantly. "Oh, it was nothing. I learned a long time ago how to cook nice meals on just a few bucks," he supplies, since if Dave wants to feel bad for him, Kurt will help him with that.

"I can't even remember the last time I had a home cooked meal," Dave says, now sounding a little touched. "Thank you." In spite of his bitter mood, Kurt's chest grows warm, but just slightly.

Dave hugs him from behind and damn, why does having Dave's arms wrapped around his body have to feel so good? Kurt's really starting to hate how good Dave makes him feel sometimes.

"Oh, it's my pleasure." he lies. "I put a lot of work and thought and effort into this meal, so you better enjoy it," Kurt says playfully, adding mentally _'and you better not throw it up.'_

"I'm sure I will. It smells really good," Dave tells him. "Want me to help you?"

"Why don't you make yourself comfortable? Everything will be ready in a few minutes."

Dave nods, kisses him on the cheek and leaves the kitchen. Kurt turns down the stove so the curry doesn't burn. As he starts preparing the chicken goujons and the potatoes, he realizes he's almost shaking; all the tension and bitterness he's been bottling up for the last day-and-a-half has him about to ready to explode.

The chicken is ready when Dave gets back to the kitchen wearing more casual clothes and they both start setting the table and the coffee table as well. Kurt's still fuming on the inside, but he forces himself to look and act as amiable as he can.

"I still think you shouldn't have done all this," Dave says again while he's placing the flatware on the table. "Makes me feel kind of bad."

"Why so? What's wrong with me wanting to feed you? I certainly don't complain when you feed me, right?" Kurt says sharply and Dave stares at him, narrowing his eyes. Kurt glares back and he's clearly losing it.

"I don't-"

"Oh, please. You think I didn't notice?"

Dave looks torn, like he's been caught, but at the same time he looks a bit angry. "What's wrong with wanting you to eat with me?" He asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Nothing, of course. I just hope that after all the work I put into this meal," Kurt points to the kitchen, "you'll have the decency to refrain from vomiting it up later in the night."

Dave throws a sharp glare as his jaw visibly clenches. "What did you say?"

"I think you heard me quite well," Kurt states coldly, walking closer to Dave.

"You know shit about me, Hummel," Dave grinds out between his teeth.

Kurt snorts. "Oh, so we're back to last names? Maybe you're right, _Karofsky, _maybe I know shit, as you so eloquently put it, but you know nothing about me either, so I'd appreciate if you stopped treating me as a charity case. I don't freaking need your help."

Dave laughs icily and Kurt clenches his fist, wishing he could just punch him in the face. "Right, 'cause you're doing so freaking well, huh?"

"And you think you're magically going to fix my life with your money or your food? You think that by paying me to fuck you my world is suddenly a better place? Or that having dinner with you will improve my health? You know shit about _me_, Karofsky! So stop playing humanitarian with me, because whatever you do makes no damn difference."

"You-"

"And who the hell are you to question how well I'm doing? I'm not the one who spent the night throwing up three freaking cakes from the Cheesecake Factory!"

Kurt swears he can see fire in Dave's eyes, but hell if he cares.

"Who the hell are _you_ to talk about anything? You're just a whore."

Dave's words actually don't hurt him; quite the opposite, Kurt feels strengthened. Right now his hooker façade is his best shield. "Exactly. I'm just a whore," he sneers at Dave. "So you should start treating me like one. You don't need to go all Mother Theresa on me; you just have to fuck me."

"Yeah, why don't I do just that?" Dave growls, leaning in until their faces are separated by only a few inches.

Kurt's heart is racing, in anger and also in lust, and when Dave forces their mouths together Kurt throws his arms around Dave, holding him tightly as they share a forceful, heated kiss.

They quickly move to Dave's bedroom, almost ripping each other's clothes off along the way. Kurt's so mad at Dave and he's sure that Dave's equally mad at him; at least he can release some of his anger by scratching Dave and pulling his hair.

Dave doesn't go easy on him. Once they lie naked – well, almost naked in Dave's case - Dave bites his neck hard, sucking and scratching his skin and even if it hurts, Kurt can't help moaning since Dave always manages to be rough on him in a way than instead of being painful is nothing but pleasant.

They waste no time. Dave quickly gets the lube and Kurt's kind of impatient, painfully hard and so angry. "Ugh, just fuck me already, Karofsky."

Dave glares at him, with a mix of disdain and lust in his eyes. "I'll do whatever the fuck I want with you."

Dave pushes Kurt's legs apart, places them on his shoulders and shoves his cock inside Kurt with no preparation. "Oh, fucking god! You freaking bastard!" Kurt screams in pain, since Dave's cock is not small enough to fit inside him just like that.

Dave doesn't move right away though, and for that Kurt's grateful. Kurt's eyes are shut as he does his best to get used to the intrusion, but when he opens his eyes he can see that Dave looks somewhat guilty.

Kurt's torn because he hates that Dave is so caring with him, but he doesn't want Dave to fuck him painfully, either. But it's not the first time he's taking Dave's cock, so it doesn't take long before the pain starts easing. The thickness of Dave's cock stretches his hole wide until it hurts no more.

"Move," Kurt grunts. Dave thrusts are slow and steady, and Kurt rolls his eyes. "That's the best you can do, Karofsky?" Kurt inquires, challenging him.

"Fuck you, Hummel," Dave spits out, thrusting harder.

Kurt moans, arching his back in pleasure since the pain is subsiding for real now as he revels in the almost brutal way Dave is pounding his ass. This is what Kurt's talking about.

Dave's ramming his hole in and out, fast and hard, moaning loudly and Kurt feels great for the first time in days. Actually, for the first time since the last time Dave fucked him, which is pretty pathetic.

Kurt writhes in ecstasy beneath Dave, moaning wantonly. Dave bends over, shoving his tongue inside Kurt's mouth and Kurt sucks his tongue and kisses him hungrily, fisting Dave's tee.

Dave keeps slamming his cock inside Kurt's ass, reaching even further up and deeper inside until he rams against Kurt's prostate and Kurt's sees white. "Oh, yes! There!"

Kurt's cock is hard, and he can't manage to coordinate his limbs to touch himself because Dave seems pretty pleased about having reached that spot inside Kurt and he's thrusting his cock merciless against it, over and over.

Kurt's breath is ragged, and he starts feeling a bit dizzy because of the pleasure that's burning his loins. But when he tries to gasp for air and none comes in, Kurt's blood turns cold in spite of the heat he's feeling. Kurt frowns as his body moves back and forth with the force of Dave's thrusts, but he can't really pay attention to that since reality is sinking in.

His horniness subsides fast due to the lack of air; with his judgment not so clouded by lust, he can notice now how his chest hurts and how the air is still not getting into his lungs every time he sucks for it.

He's having an asthma attack.

"Dave," Kurt calls to him, yet nothing but a breathless gasp comes out of his mouth. Kurt quickly grows desperate; he can't breathe and Dave is still fucking him like there's no tomorrow. Kurt tries to tell him to stop but once again no words come out and he's sure Dave thinks he's just panting because of the sex.

So Kurt pushes his hands against Dave's chest, anxious to get him away and Dave abruptly stops, frowning at him. In the sudden silence, Kurt's frenetic and rapid wheezing is all they can hear. Dave stares at him, frightened.

"Shit, Kurt. What's going on?"

"_Get off,"_ Kurt manages to mouth and Dave's quickly pulls his cock out, moving from on top of him and Kurt's so needy for air that he doesn't even register any pain. He quickly sits up in bed, pressing a hand against his chest, but the sitting position doesn't help at all.

"Kurt? Tell me? Did I hurt you? Shit, Kurt, talk to me," Dave's kneeling right in front of him, worried and distressed. "Fuck, I'm sorry. Tell me, what can I do?"

Kurt's airway is get narrower and narrower with every second that passes; the wheezing turns louder and faster, and Dave's face is a mask of agonized concern but Kurt doesn't care because he needs his inhaler _now_.

"_Jacket," _Kurt mouths and Dave stares at him.

"Your jacket?" Kurt nods desperately, miming his inhaler and thankfully Dave immediately understands. "I'll get it for you. Hold on," he says, already rushing out to the living room.

Kurt listens to Dave's hurried steps and tries to hang on; Dave returns to the bedroom just a few seconds later, handing the inhaler to him. Kurt shakes it as he tilts his head back slightly. He brings the inhaler to his mouth and presses down, feeling the bitter tasting medicine move down his throat and then he breathes slowly for a few seconds. He takes a second puff and holds his breath to push the medicine deeper into his lungs.

He catches Dave staring intently at him and Kurt feels slightly self-conscious and embarrassed.

Kurt's muscles start relaxing though, and that's comforting; the air begins to fill his lungs and he coughs a little. "I'm sorry," Kurt tells him with a raspy voice.

He feels very stupid; not once since being diagnosed with adult onset asthma did he ever have a sex-triggered asthma attack.

Kurt has to admit though that he never had the kind of sex he has with Dave - rough and passionate at the same time, sex that always leaves him breathless. Yet, since this never happened to him before, he never thought it actually could happen. And usually he can pick up the subtle signals that an attack is starting, but because of the angry sex they were having, Kurt didn't even realize an attack was coming on until it was well underway; Lord, thinking back Kurt can't even pinpoint when he started having trouble breathing!

Dave exhales deeply, obviously relieved. "You almost give me a freaking heart attack. Do you feel better?" Kurt nods. "I didn't know you had asthma. Never saw you carrying one of those at school," Dave says, motioning to the inhaler.

"I wasn't asthmatic back then."

Dave frowns. "You caught asthma as a grown up? I didn't know that was possible."

"It is," Kurt says, not willing to explain more. Instead, he takes another puff and leans back against the headboard of the bed as air fills his lungs.

Dave's eyes go wide in realization. "Fucking Jesus, Kurt," he shouts, sounding concerned and mad, "you let me choke you!"

It's Kurt's turn to frown. "You didn't choke me."

"Not tonight, but I did before, more than once," Dave states, standing up and picking his underwear off the floor. "How could you let me do that? I could have hurt you! I can't do shit like that if you have breathing problems!"

Kurt watches Dave putting his boxers on and he wants to kill himself; he can't believe what just happened and he hates that now Dave knows he has "breathing problems."

He's such a loser.

"It's never happened before," Kurt spits out since it's true. He won't explain to Dave how asthma works, but he actually had no issues with his breathing when Dave choked him. "Just… just give me a few minutes and we can continue," Kurt offers, trying to tone down his frustration and also wanting to change the subject. Now he also feels the urge to make it up to Dave for all this mess.

But apparently there's no better turn off than an asthma attack, because Dave snorts and shakes his head. "Are you crazy? I'm not touching you while you're like this."

Dave's words hit him like a slap in the face; a mix of contradicting feelings assault his mind, overwhelming him. What is Dave saying?

"So … what? You're never fucking me again? Now that you've found out your whore is damaged you'll stop calling?"

Kurt gets up from the bed, ripping off the top sheet to cover himself with something since he feels as mad as he feels small and the last thing he wants is to stand naked and vulnerable in front of Dave while Dave dumps him. Tears are starting to prick at his eyes.

It hurts so much. He never thought that the prospect of not seeing Dave anymore could upset him like this. Sure, it pisses him off to receive Dave's charity, but seeing him was a nice change to his monotonous and shitty life, all things considered.

Now Kurt's suddenly losing the little moments of enjoyment he had recently found with Dave – the company of a familiar face, the great sex, even the stupid dinners together - and all because of his fucked up health. He's so angry and upset - once again, his health is ruining everything for him. Big freaking surprise!

He can't blame Dave, though. Who would want to deal with their hooker's medical problems? He's sure Dave can find loads of guys who'll be much better lays than Kurt could ever be.

"Hey, hey, hey, slow down," Dave approaches him, wrapping his arms around him and holding him in place. Kurt wants to push Dave away, but he doesn't, instead surrendering to his own need for comfort. "That's not what I meant at all."

Kurt lets out an icy laugh. "I fail to see why you would want to call a whore you won't fuck," he states with venom in his voice.

Dave sighs. "Why don't I fix you a bath? That will make you feel better-"

"Stop pampering me!" Kurt finally loses it, shoving Dave away. "I don't want your cha-"

"It's not charity, for fuck's sake!" Dave barks back. "You probably know better than I how this asthma thing works, but you scared the shit out of me, okay? I thought I hurt you or that you were going to die or something! So please, let me fix you a fucking bath so you can fucking relax and stop bitching at me about everything so I can stop freaking out!"

Kurt glares at Dave but he feels a little more at ease: Dave's not dumping him. Dave's not saying that he won't ever have him back. In addition, for some fucked up reason, Kurt feels better when Dave is yelling at him than when he's being all sweet and kind. He doesn't need Dave treating him like he's about to break, because he's already broken, and every time Dave is all caring with him Kurt feels incredibly small.

"Fine," Kurt grumbles.

Dave leads Kurt to the bathroom and moves to start running a warm bath but Kurt stops him. "I'll use the shower."

Dave rolls his eyes. "I know you like warm baths better," he states, annoyed.

Kurt throws Dave a sharp look. "The shower steam will help me to breathe better, thank you very much."

"Oh," is all Dave says, turning on the shower faucets. He hands Kurt a couple of towels and then leaves him alone in the bathroom.

Kurt lets the sheet drop to the floor, and steps into the shower. The hot water relaxes his body, and thankfully he's not having issues with his breathing any longer. But as his body eases, his mind starts racing. Kurt's a mess of conflicting thoughts and feelings and it's hard for him to deal with them all.

He shouldn't be such an ass to Dave. It upsets him that Dave thinks he has the right to take care of him, but Kurt doesn't have the right to call Dave on his issues, either. It's none of his business if Dave throws up his food, and if Dave in fact does have an eating disorder, Kurt probably didn't help the situation by throwing it right in Dave's face in such a tactless way.

Kurt groans, frustrated. He's been having a very rough few days indeed, but that's no reason to treat Dave the way he did. After all, even if Kurt hates it, Dave is very decent to him; he's standing right now under the hot water since Dave is nursing him after an asthma attack and Kurt is just his whore. Dave could easily not give a damn about him.

It should be nice having someone take care of him, but Kurt is unable to feel good about _Dave_ taking care of him, because it's obvious that Dave pities him.

And now Dave has something real and tangible to pin his pity on - Kurt's damaged health. Kurt doesn't want to let Dave into his life. Dave is just a client; a guy who pays to fuck him, and probably he does that just to put some money in his pocket instead of hiring him because he actually wants him.

Kurt sighs, exhausted, and turns the faucets off, knowing he has to leave the bathroom eventually and face Dave.

He has nothing to put on, so he wraps some towels around himself and goes back to Dave's bedroom, just to find himself alone in the almost darkness. He feels around, trying to find his clothes, knowing they should be scattered somewhere on the floor, but he doesn't find any.

Kurt hears Dave approaching. "Hey. Heard the shower end."

Kurt swallows hard and nervous. "Yeah."

Dave pulls some clothes from his closet and hands them to Kurt. Kurt looks at him questioningly. Where are his own clothes?

"You don't have pajamas or anything comfortable to wear. These ones are probably way too big for you, but they'll keep you warm," Dave tells him.

Kurt can't manage to refuse wearing Dave's sweatpants because he really loves being warm. "Thanks," he replies, quietly.

"Feeling better?"

"Yeah."

Dave just stares at him and then he nods. "You get yourself dressed, and join me in the living room, okay?"

Dave leaves him alone in the bedroom and Kurt feels like he's about to get grounded, like he's a teenager again, nervous because he did something wrong and his father is waiting for him in the living room to have a serious talk.

Still, he puts on the clothes Dave gave him: socks, sweatpants, a white tee and a hoodie. He has to pull the waist string of the sweatpants tight so they won't slide down. Every piece is huge on him. but Kurt feels warm and comfortable, and Dave's clothes also smell incredibly nice. Kurt holds his chin up, gaining as much courage as he can and heads to the living room, finding that both the coffee table and the dining table are already set and Dave's in the kitchen.

Kurt realizes Dave is reheating the food he cooked earlier and he wants to bitch at Dave, but he's tired and Dave's being nice so he lets him be.

"Hey," Kurt says, approaching him.

Dave turns around smiling and then suddenly his face falls. "What the hell?"

Kurt's taken aback, a bit scared since Dave looks way pissed and Kurt doesn't know what he did wrong. "Wh-what?"

Dave reduces the distance between them with a mix of anger and concern in his eyes. "What happened to your face?"

Kurt frowns. "Huh?"

Dave points to his cheek and realization strikes his mind: his stupid bruise. He just washed off the make-up that had been covering it. Dave couldn't see it in the darkened bedroom but there's plenty of light in the kitchen to allow Dave a proper view. Kurt can't believe it; despite his best efforts, he's revealing all the aspects of his miserable life to Dave.

He shifts in place, uneasy. "It's nothing," he says, embarrassed for his life, throwing his arms around his chest and hugging himself.

"Nothing? You have a bruise of the size of Nebraska in your face!"

Kurt glares at Dave. "The shower just washed away the make-up. I'm sorry, you were not supposed to see it!"

Dave groans as the microwave beeps and he proceeds to take the reheated food out. "Because that makes it all better, right? Covering it?"

"Purple greenish bruises are not very sexy, you know?"

Dave sighs, defeated, and fills two plates with the dinner Kurt cooked earlier. "Who hit you?"

"What?"

"Who hit you, Hummel?" Dave asks sternly and Kurt can't understand why he's so mad.

"No one hit me! And what do you care? It's not of your business!"

Dave lets out an sarcastic laugh. "Yeah, right. So a huge bruise just appeared in your face out of nowhere."

Kurt takes a plate for himself and heads to the dining room, not feeling very eager to talk about this with Dave. The last thing Kurt wants is to expose himself more. Dave follows behind him with food in his hands but he doesn't let it go.

"Kurt, tell me for once! Who hit you?"

Kurt clenches his jaw and sits in his usual seat; Dave's standing in front of him, ready to kill someone. "I told you, no one hit me," he repeats since it's the truth.

"You can't expect me to believe you."

He gives up. "Okay. Some drunken jerk climbed on stage when I was dancing," he snaps at him, unable to conceal the annoyance in his voice. "He tried to grope me and our bouncer was trying to get him away from me. In their struggling, I got shoved and I hit my face against the pole. So there, honestly, no one hit me. Happy now?"

Dave's face softens but he says nothing. Instead, he walks away from Kurt and Kurt hears him taking his place at the coffee table. "I'm sorry."

They're not facing each other anymore when Kurt hears him say that but still he shrugs, defeated.

"It's alright," Kurt says and starts eating.

It tastes good, which makes Kurt feel a little better since it's proof that he's not losing his culinary skills, even if he hardly ever cooks. He allows himself to calm down and put aside his fight with Dave.

"This is really good," Dave tells him, mouth full.

Kurt smiles, goal achieved. "I know, right? I mean, I don't want to sound like I'm full of myself, but I was a terrific cook once. It's nice to know I still am."

The late dinner eases them both. It's like they've tacitly agreed to avoid the huge elephants in the room: Dave's bulimia, Kurt's asthma, their failed sex, and all the other painful things that were exposed tonight.

But the guilt is eating at Kurt over the harsh remarks he made earlier about Dave's – still supposed, since Dave never confirmed anything- bulimia.

"Dave?"

"Hm?"

Kurt takes advantage of their current positions, apart and backs to each other. Not facing Dave right now makes this easier. "I'm sorry for what I said earlier. I've had some pretty rough days, but I shouldn't have lashed out at you. Whatever's going on with you, it's none of my business and I was completely out of line. So I'm sorry for what I said."

Dave says nothing for the longest seconds, and Kurt starts agonizing over the lack of reply. He really pushed Dave's buttons when he pointed out the Cheescake Factory cakes and the throwing up. Dave could be in denial about the bulimia, or maybe not in denial but hiding it from everyone, and Kurt just put Dave's deepest issue in the spotlight.

"No, it's not of your business," Dave finally breaks the silence. "But thanks, and I'm sorry you had a rough few days."

Kurt exhales, relieved. Now he would really like Dave to apologize for treating him as a charity case, because while it's not Kurt's business what's going on with Dave's life, it's not Dave's business what's going on in his life, either. If Kurt is tacitly promising he'll stay away from Dave's private life, Dave should do the same.

Yet, here Kurt is, sitting at Dave's table feeding himself, so Dave's winning again, which is not fair. But Kurt says nothing, preferring to call a truce.

After dinner, Kurt helps Dave do the dishes and then they head to the bedroom. Dave doesn't make any move on him, and that kills Kurt. Surely Dave doesn't believe that if they have sex it will trigger another asthma attack? Okay, even if it's something that could happen –it happened once tonight already- they have had sex plenty of times and everything went just fine.

But Kurt doesn't try to make a move on Dave, either. His pride is too hurt right now, he's not feeling sexy or aroused or willing to do anything sex related because deep inside he's sure Dave will reject him and Kurt won't be able to deal with that.

So they lie next to each other in bed, feeling really awkward. Dave asks him again if he's feeling better and even though he's way over his asthma attack, it seems that Dave is still shaken up about it, so in addition of the mess of feelings Kurt has about being rejected, he's now also feeling guilty.

"Yes, Dave. I'm really fine," Kurt replies as Dave turns off the lights.

"You really scared me," Dave tells him quietly, snuggling close to him. Kurt lets himself be embraced, resting his head on Dave's chest. He really likes this closeness.

"I'm sorry. It's never happened to me before."

"Asthma attacks? But you're asthmatic, aren't you?"

Kurt lets out a small laugh, feeling a little embarrassed. "I mean during sex," he admits. "It's kind of lame."

Dave laughs as well and that relaxes him a bit. "I won't be rough with you next time, alright?"

Kurt smiles at him, glad at Dave's words: there's going to be a next time, and Kurt's finally fully relieved. "You don't need to worry about that."

He tries to fall asleep, but he can't. Kurt's tired actually, but it's been such a stressful evening that he still feels like his head is all over the place, even though he's resting comfortably in bed with Dave. The room is quiet but it takes quite a long time until his eyelids finally grow heavy. But just when Kurt's ready to fall asleep, he feels Dave shift.

Once again, Kurt pretends to be asleep, but not for the same reasons as last time. Dave lifts Kurt's head off his chest and carefully deposits him on the pillow and then gets up. It pains Kurt to realize that Dave is going to throw up his meal, believing that Kurt has fallen asleep already and won't hear him. But Kurt promised he would leave Dave and his issues alone.

Kurt hears Dave take steps in the direction to the bathroom, but then Dave stands completely still. Kurt's heartbeat starts picking up, because now he can clearly hear Dave pacing around the room, going between the bathroom and the bed. Kurt presses his lips together to keep from making any noise because it's obvious that Dave is fighting his urge to rush to the toilet to throwing up everything.

It seems that for whatever reason, Kurt's words struck a cord with Dave. Whether it's because Kurt asked him not to vomit the food he cook specially for him, or because he called Dave on his issues, Kurt doesn't know. What he does know is that if Dave has a habit of throwing up his meals, this hesitation doesn't mean that he will suddenly stop doing it. Yet, Kurt hopes Dave will return to bed with a full stomach, at least for tonight.

Dave continues to pace around the room for what seems like forever and when he returns to bed without having entered the bathroom, Kurt has to press his lips together in order not to let out a joyful squeak. He wants to hug or cuddle Dave, just to show how happy and maybe even proud of him he is, but he doesn't, since then Dave would realize that he's been awake all this time.

It's Dave though who throws his arms around Kurt, holding him close. Kurt smiles, melting into the embrace and sighs contently.

They both drift into a heavy sleep.

* * *

><p>When Kurt wakes up, it's still dark. Dave's sleeping by his side and when he checks Dave's alarm clock, he learns that it's five in the morning and he has no idea why he woke up this early.<p>

Fifteen minutes pass and Kurt can't manage to go back to sleep; and whenever he looks at Dave's sleeping figure, he thinks about how crappy this night has been. It's really bothering him that because of his stupid asthma they didn't have sex, so he completely failed at pleasing Dave in the slightest. If anything, Kurt upset Dave quite a lot.

He's been a terrible whore, and what's worse is that within a couple of hours they'll both get up, Kurt will head back home while Dave will head to work, but because Dave feels sorry for him, before Kurt leaves Dave will surely pay him 300 bucks for the night, even though Kurt did nothing to deserve it. Getting that money, it's always the worst part of spending the night with Dave, but this time it will be ten times worse.

But it's very early and Dave's asleep, and Kurt believes it's a great opportunity to take off. It's too dark to go back to his neighborhood, but he can stay at some coffee shop or something until the sun comes up.

Kurt carefully slides out of bed, walking softly in order not to wake Dave up. He curses to himself when he realizes that he doesn't know where Dave put his clothes, so he looks for them in the darkness, trying to guide himself around Dave's bedroom with his hands, touching everything without making a noise, until he finally finds a pile of folded clothes on Dave's armchair. He touches his skinny jeans and his jacket and once he's sure all his things are there, he gathers everything in his arms. He hears Dave shifting in bed and goes completely still, waiting for Dave to grow quiet.

But Dave doesn't. Kurt can hear him moving every time more, and he knows he just got caught.

Very much caught, since Dave turns on the bedside lamp. His eyes fall quickly on Kurt and he frowns. "What are you doing?" he asks in a very sleepy voice.

And Kurt has all his clothes in his hands, so he can't really lie. "I'm…"

"You're leaving?"

"Yeah," God, why does he have such awful luck? Can't he ever catch a break?

Dave quickly looks at the alarm clock and then back at Kurt. "It's twenty past five. What's going on?" he sits up straight in bed, blinking repeatedly like he's forcing himself to wake up fully. "Are you alright? Are you feeling sick or something?"

"No, no, it's nothing like that," Kurt hurries to explain, since the last thing he wants is Dave worrying more about him. "I just… have to leave."

Dave stays silent, as if he's trying to read between lines since judging by the way Kurt's fidgeting in place, he's hiding something.

"And you were going to leave while I was sleeping? Without waking me up?"

Kurt shrugs his shoulders. "You had a rough night, alright? I wanted to let you rest."

Silence falls upon the room again and Kurt feels nothing but exposed since Dave's staring intensely at him. "You weren't going to let me pay you," he finally concludes, figuring out Kurt's intentions.

By this point, Kurt doesn't even bother denying it. "No, I wasn't going to. You're such a nice guy that I know you plan to pay me," he says bitterly, as he starts taking off Dave's pajamas to put on his own clothes. "But because of my asthma we didn't get to have sex, plus I scared you and also upset you, so no, I don't want money for providing such awful service."

Dave sighs, lazily scratching the back of his head, but says nothing at first. Kurt considers the conversation finished, so he proceeds to take off Dave's shirt and sweatpants to put on his own clothes, but when he's wearing nothing but his underwear, Dave's voice breaks the silence.

"Come here," he says softly, extending his arm to Kurt.

Kurt narrows his eyes at Dave suspiciously, but he does what he's asked and approaches the bed until he's standing by the edge of it, looking down at Dave questioningly.

"What?"

"Don't go just yet," Dave tells him, wrapping his arms around Kurt's waist and pulling him down onto his lap.

Almost instinctively, Kurt throws his arms around Dave's neck, but in spite of that, he's not happy about what's happening. "I'm not going to have sex with you," he states, reading Dave's intentions.

Dave simply starts applying soft kisses to Kurt's neck. "Why not?" he asks in a low voice between kisses.

Kurt has to really make an effort not to tilt his head to give Dave better access; he doesn't want to fall for this. "Because you don't want to have sex with me."

Dave stills and Kurt knows all he needs to know: he just caught Dave. It really hurts his pride and his ego to discover his suspicions were correct. His _faux_ hooker act aside, he kind of liked thinking that Dave desired him, since no one ever really desired him before.

It's been a long time since his self-esteem was so boldly crushed. His ex boyfriends were jerks, but at least they didn't pity fuck him.

Dave pulls back just enough to look Kurt right in the eye. Kurt looks away though, since he's feeling very stupid and pathetic. "Why do you think that?"

Kurt snorts, still avoiding Dave's gaze. "Because yesterday you decided not to have sex with me. You can't expect me to think that it's just coincidence you want to fuck me _now_, right after I told you I wasn't going to take any money from you because I didn't do anything to earn it."

"That's not-"

"I don't want you to fuck me just to put money in my pocket," Kurt cuts him off firmly, now looking straight into his eyes. He draws strength from his prostitute alter ego, since he has no strength himself. Getting into his hooker persona make it easier to detach from himself when he's with Dave."I know I'm broke and I know I'm a whore, but I certainly don't want or need pity fucks."

Dave stares at him intensely, and then a small amused grin forms in his mouth. "Pity fucks? You think that having sex with you is some kind of sacrifice?"

Kurt rolls his eyes. "Not a _sacrifice_ but-"

"You're so freaking hot," Dave interrupts him, placing a kiss behind his ear. "But that's not news, since I've told you that before," and Kurt can recall Dave saying that on more than one occasion while having sex. "I just got scared last night. I didn't want to cause another asthma attack."

"We've had sex before and that never happened."

"Put yourself in my place for a minute, alright? Maybe you're used to having asthma attacks, but I didn't even know you suffered from asthma, so it was pretty frightening for me to see you wheezing and struggling for air. I didn't know what the hell was happening."

Kurt can't really argue since Dave has a point. Severe asthma attacks don't happen to him that often actually, since Kurt uses his inhaler way before they could get bad. Yet when he experiences a full-blown attack it's pretty scary, so it must look really frightening to someone who's watching it happen.

"But there's no reason we can't make up for what we couldn't do last night," Dave smirks.

Kurt forces himself not to smile, because he knows that Dave's just doing this to have a reason to give him money, so he says nothing, just in case something like a giggle might escape from his mouth.

Then Dave leans over, Kurt meets him half way and they kiss softly. They've had morning sex, and of course it's more gentle and lazy, but Kurt senses that Dave is being extra soft with him. Kurt lets him though. He straddles Dave's lap, kneeling on the bed with his legs on either side of Dave's tights.

Dave holds him by his waist, quickly tugging his underwear and Kurt's already full of lust, not thinking reasons, or pity or money or self-esteem. They kiss lusciously for several minutes, in which they both get rid of their underwear but remain on this position, Kurt straddling Dave's lap and pressing their erections together.

Kurt's grinding his cock against Dave's hard-on, making him moan, and Kurt moans as well. Kurt keeps on kissing him as Dave reaches for the lube, getting his fingers slick, and then he lifts Kurt's hips in order to expose his ass a bit, probing his entrance and Kurt's so hot, horny and needy that he pushes himself down onto Dave's fingers.

"Oh, God," Kurt grunts, and Dave sucks his neck, nibbling and biting as he works his fingers in an out of Kurt's hole.

Kurt moans helplessly, just because he feels hot. He's so in need of sex, of sex with Dave that he's feeling dizzy in anticipation.

He's tight and the preparation seems to take forever, even if it's probably only a few minutes, but Kurt can't wait anymore so after becoming comfortable with Dave's two fingers, he practically begs Dave to fuck him.

"You sure you're ready?"

"Yes, Dave," Kurt gushes out, getting a condom and quickly handing it to Dave.

Dave laughs quietly, but he kisses him again and Kurt moves a little just to give Dave room enough to put the condom on. When Dave's ready, Kurt's about to get off his lover lap but Dave holds him in place.

"I want you to ride me," Dave tells him.

They've never tried this position before. Lord, Kurt has never tried that with any of his boyfriends, and the realization that he was so vanilla regarding sex makes him want to kill himself. Kurt really can't ask Dave for a different position since Dave's in charge, and riding someone shouldn't be rocket science so he nods.

"Only if you want to," Dave continues, apparently noticing Kurt's inner debate.

Kurt can't tell Dave that he's never ridden a man, since he's supposedly a skilled hooker. But Kurt's confident with himself, since with Dave he has done loads of stuff that he'd never done before in bed and it always turned out more than alright.

"Who says I don't?" Kurt asks, using a sensual voice. He needs to stick to his act.

"I don't want to be too rough on you," Dave confesses, looking ashamed for some reason.

Now Kurt _does_ feel his world is coming down. Damn, he was confident two seconds before! Honestly, being with Dave is like being on a freaking roller-coaster of conflicting emotions.

"Because of my asthma?" Kurt asks, even though he knows the answer. Of course Dave nods and Kurt wants to kill himself.

It's obvious Dave likes rough sex better. Now he's going to be a boring fuck to Dave?

"You can control the pace," Dave says. "Just don't get too worked up though, okay?"

Kurt's jaw tightens because he doesn't want to be on control, he wants Dave to have the control.

"So we can have boring sex?" he asks bitterly.

"Why do you think it's going to be boring?" Dave inquires in a playful tone, like he wants to makes him laugh, obviously sensing Kurt's anger.

Kurt snorts. "The fact that you only fuck me rough? I'm pretty sure that's what you like."

"I'm more flexible than you think."

"You shouldn't have to be flexible for my sake. I'm a whore, Dave."

Dave rolls his eyes. "Exactly. And as your client, I choose the way we fuck and I don't feel like being rough today."

This little chat has almost killed the mood, but Dave kisses him again and Kurt lets himself enjoy it, forgetting everything else. He feels the tip of Dave's cock caressing his ring and Kurt pushes himself down, sinking himself onto Dave's erection.

Kurt holds tight around Dave's neck, getting used to the intrusion and God, the pleasure is incredible. And to think he almost went back home and missed this…

Dave holds him by his sides, easing him slowly up and down his cock and Kurt follows the rhythm.

"Fuck, Kurt," Dave almost whines, and Kurt knows that it's taking a lot of effort for Dave to go this slow.

Slow feels different from rough but just as good; it's like Kurt has more time to savor the pleasure. Dave is still the one setting the pace and Kurt just melts into it.

He likes when Dave's in charge.

Plus, Dave's moaning and grunting every time Kurt lowers himself deep onto his lap, so he's enjoying it as well. Kurt attaches their mouths together, rubbing his hands all over Dave's shoulders and chest; he grows more and more excited as Dave's hands roam his body as well, and Kurt starts quickening the pace, going suddenly too fast for Dave's liking.

Dave's hands find Kurt's hips, holding him tight and still. "Easy."

Kurt groans. "I'm not going to die, Dave," he replies, frustrated. "And if I get another asthma attack, my inhaler is right there," he points at the bedside table.

"I can take it. I have before," he says, licking all the way up Dave's neck, and nibbling his ear.

"Okay," Dave breathes, and then Kurt's suddenly being pumped up and down on Dave's big, hard cock.

"Fuck, yes!"

And Kurt loses all control fast, especially when Dave reaches his prostate; Kurt moans so hard that his throat hurts, but he doesn't care because Dave realizes that he's found his precious spot and keeps on fucking like there's no tomorrow, always at the same angle.

After a while, Dave stops lifting him from the waist because Kurt is bouncing his hips up and down on his own. It feels incredible; the pleasure is overwhelming, and he loves having Dave's body so close to him, being tightly embraced as he's given the ride of his life.

Dave bucks him even faster while all Kurt can do is to hold on, not wanting this fuck to end, ever. His prostate is being crushed over and over and he can feel his orgasm growing close, and he's as desperate to come as he is desperate to push it away, not wanting to come so soon.

But Dave wants him to come, obviously, because he fists Kurt's cock and starts pumping it and it's just too much. Dave's cock plowing into him at the same time he's being jerked off drives him to the edge.

"Dave, I'm gonna come," Kurt breathes out.

"Come for me."

"Oh, God, Dave!" And Kurt comes; he comes hard, every muscle in his body tightens and Dave's cock feels even bigger inside him as his ring clenches tightly around it.

Dave keeps bucking upward, moaning loudly, and in the middle of the mess Kurt is because of the orgasm that has not subsided yet, he can feel Dave's cock pulsing and pulsing; he comes as Kurt's load goes soaring across Dave's chest.

Kurt collapses on top of Dave, exhausted and pleased. So freaking pleased that he can't believe it; every time he has sex with Dave it's mind blowing.

Dave finally stops moving underneath Kurt, exhausted as well, but he holds Kurt close in his arms. Kurt's so comfortable where he is that he can't even think about how weird it feels to have his chest pressed against Dave's while Dave's shirt is all wet with his come.

Dave has won again, because they had sex and he now has a reason to pay Kurt in spite of all the things that went wrong.

But right now, Kurt can't bring himself to care.


	10. Chapter 9

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> Nc17.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression. Breath play.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> S1 and S2.  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Ella Greggs.  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 88oo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pft! If I owned Glee, Dave would be back.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five yearssince Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 9<strong>

Dave finds it hard to concentrate at work, but luckily it doesn't show. Even though he's been working on balances and statistics for the past four hours, in the back of his head there are constant thoughts about Kurt. It's exhausting; it's exhausting to work and worry about Kurt at the same time.

Dave knew he was playing with fire the first time he saw Kurt and decided to have sex with him, but he didn't expect to get burned like this. Never in a million years would he have thought he'd be going through all the things that are happening to him now.

Seeing Kurt is not healthy for him, literally; Dave feels that ever since they start seeing each other, he's getting worse, and coming from him, that's saying a lot.

Six o'clock Friday finally arrives and Dave couldn't be happier about that. He packs his laptop along with his other stuff, and after saying goodbye to his workmates, wishing them a great weekend, he heads to the parking lot to get his car and drive home, promising himself that he won't stop at any place selling food on the way.

He does a remarkable job ignoring Hershey's in Time Square and a bunch of fast food places. When he passes the Cheesecake Factory his hands tremble while holding the wheel, but he keeps on driving, wrecked and anxious.

Kurt's going to lead him to a nervous breakdown, Dave just knows it.

When Dave gets back to his apartment, he's relieved that he's not carrying bags and bags of unhealthy food, an increasingly common occurrence since he started seeing Kurt.

Dave unfastens his tie and takes off his jacket as he marches to the kitchen where he takes a glass and a bottle of Johnny Walker out of the cupboard. He pours the whiskey into the glass, drinking it all in one go, and then he refills the glass. Dave then heads to the living room, where he turns on the TV, just to avoid being surrounded by silence. He takes off his shoes as he drinks some more alcohol.

He's a bundle of nerves and he needs to take the edge off somehow. The whiskey will hit him hard with an empty stomach, but tomorrow is Saturday so Dave can give himself the luxury of getting drunk tonight.

Kurt's ruining him; well, not _Kurt,_ since none of the things that are happening to Dave are Kurt's fault. It's just that Dave doesn't know how to handle this situation and he's losing control of the few things that he's worked so hard to have control over.

The more he sees Kurt, the more insecure Dave feels. So he's constantly breaking his diet, falling into the sickest binges all the time. It's not something that never happened before meeting Kurt again, but now Dave's giving in to temptation almost every other day.

It was his biggest secret, his relationship with food. His old therapist said he was bulimic, and while Dave hates that word, he has to accept that binging and purging is the very definition of bulimia. He hates even more the term 'eating disorder', because Dave doesn't think he has an eating disorder; he's just fat and fails to keep his weight down.

And now Kurt knows his secret, so he knows how much of a failure Dave is. None of his ex-boyfriends ever found out about his binges and vomiting; they knew about his trouble with eating in public and they were okay with never eating together. In fact, each of his past relationships lasted a long time: he was with his first boyfriend for over a year, and with his second boyfriend almost two years. Dave never lived with them, so maybe that made some difference. Kurt's been coming to his home as his hooker for just one month and already he's found out.

_Kurt._ The last person on earth Dave would want to know about this.

His stress doesn't end there, though. Of course it doesn't, since things always have to be incredibly messy with Dave.

When Dave's not thinking about the fact that he got caught by Kurt, he thinks about Kurt himself. Dave wonders how Kurt's doing, if he's alright, if he's eating properly, if his clients hurt him...

The wondering and worrying are eating Dave alive. There are so many things he doesn't know about Kurt... and each new thing Dave finds out about Kurt's current life just disturbs him more: first he's a stripper, then he's a lap dancer, then he's a prostitute, then he's so broke he can't feed himself properly, then he's sick, then he gets hit at work...

Dave is still finding it hard to digest what happened their previous night together.

God, Kurt's freaking asthma attack! When Dave recalls the moment Kurt pushed him away, wheezing and fighting for air, his blood turns cold. He's never been so scared in his life; for a moment, Dave really thought Kurt was dying or something. Actually, he thought even worse, that _he_ had somehow hurt Kurt.

There's something more to Kurt's health problems, though. There must be. As far as Dave knows – which admittedly is not an awful lot – people with asthma lead very normal lives, yet he has the impression Kurt gets stick often.

And some other stuff that Kurt said the last time they saw each other still rings in Dave's ears: he's "not helping in the slightest." Dave pays Kurt a lot more money than his regular clients, and feeds him, too. Of course, having two good meals a week won't help Kurt much, but anyway they're seeing each other twice a week, so Kurt gets six C-notes a week, which is twenty-four hundred a month. It's not a bad haul for sleeping with _just one_ man.

How broke can Kurt be that two thousands four hundred dollars makes no difference?

Dave drinks all the whiskey remaining in his glass and gets up to look for more. His stomach grumbles, but Dave pays no attention. He leaves the glass on the counter and drinks straight from the Johnny Walker bottle as he heads to his bedroom.

This is not healthy; Kurt being back in his life is ruining him, again, but in a different way than it ruined him years ago. Yes, once again Dave feels more horrible about himself than usual just from being in Kurt's presence. But instead of taking his stress out on other people through bullying, he binges and throws up. And those are both happening way more often than they used to. He's so constantly anxious that he can't help eating like a pig just to pamper himself a little, but then he realizes what he did, how fat he is and how unappealing he must be to Kurt...

But really, it's the endless worry and concern for Kurt that is killing him. If Dave loved himself just a little, he'd let Kurt go. He should not call Kurt again, he should just forget about him.

Dave can't just do that though; for the first time in his life, he has Kurt somehow and he can't let him go. And Dave knows he's weak: he can't even control his weight, so he certainly won't stop seeing the man he used to love so painfully, even if it brings him nothing but trouble.

Dave needs to know what's going on with Kurt, and what went so wrong in his life that he ended up like this. Kurt was right, Dave feels the urge to fix him somehow. But it's not "charity," as Kurt put it; His motives are totally selfish. Dave figures if he can make his former love better, then _he'll_ feel better, or at least a little less terrible than he does now. So he really needs to help Kurt, because he _needs_ Kurt in his house, in his bed, even if Kurt doesn't really like him and will never genuinely desire him.

Dave drinks more whiskey and he lets himself fall back into bed as he grows woozy. He leaves the empty bottle on the bedside table, dizzy and drowsy.

He'll figure out something.

* * *

><p>On Monday, Dave finds himself waiting for Kurt to arrive.<p>

It's like a new routine that they've both tacitly set. Kurt stays over at his place on Mondays and Wednesdays and Dave is glad that Kurt didn't question it when Dave's texts went from, 'Are you free on Monday/Wednesday?' to 'See you tonight.'

Anyone could tell that having a standing appointment with the same hooker twice a week every week means something more than just sex is going on. It could mean a lot of things: you're falling for the hooker, you're pathetically lonely and desperate for affection, you have a sick fixation with prostitutes... two of those three options are actually true in Dave's case, but he doesn't want to acknowledge that and he certainly won't acknowledge that to Kurt.

Dinner is ready – Vietnamese this time - waiting for them both. Dave sees no reason to stop their dinners, Kurt already caught on that Dave was trying to feed him and got mad about it, so they're past that. And it's not even just about making sure Kurt has some decent food; he actually likes having dinner with Kurt. It's strange, not precisely in a bad way, to have someone to talk to while he eats, since it's been years since the last time he ate with anyone around.

It's a bitch though, because it means breaking his strict diet, and since Kurt caught him throwing up before, purging is no longer an option. Dave hates that Kurt knows what he does to lose weight, particularly when he's not even succeeding at it since he's still overweight. It's beyond humiliating that Kurt gets to see how much of a failure he is.

Dave is nervous as usual, but unlike the previous times, tonight he's determined to get answers. Demanding information will probably make Kurt angry, creating more tension, and Kurt will probably give away nothing. And even in the event that Dave does get some information from Kurt, there's a big chance it will be nothing that eases his mind. After all, everything he's learned about Kurt's life so far is bad.

But knowing is always better than not knowing, and this guessing and speculating is killing Dave.

When Kurt arrives, everything goes the same as usual: kiss on the lips, remove the jacket and drop the bag, move to their respective seats and have dinner, engage in some meaningless conversation. The routine they've developed is so automatic now that Dave doesn't have to make any effort to pay attention to the discussion while he tries to figure out how he can ask Kurt about his life, because he can't _just ask._

Dave finishes his food while Kurt is talking about Vietnamese cuisine. It surprises Dave how much Kurt knows about cooking. He mentioned before that he used to cook a lot, but Dave didn't think he knew so much.

"Did you know Vietnamese is one of the most healthy cuisines in the world?"

Dave's lips twitch into a small smile. "No, I didn't know that." He can hardly fry an egg, so he definitely knows nothing about Vietnamese food except that he likes it. Moments like this, when they're not fighting or having hooker/customer sex, make him feel like they're just two people with no major issues who just have dinner together and hang out.

This must be how normal people live and interact, or so Dave guesses. He wishes he was normal.

"I tried cooking it for my Dad sometimes, but no matter what I made he would only eat the spring rolls."

Dave gets up from the floor, and walks towards Kurt's place at the table. Kurt hasn't finished his meal yet, and according to their almost strict routine, this is a new thing. They usually wait until they both finish eating to clean the tables, but now Dave's sitting across from Kurt, so Kurt puts down the soda glass he's just picked up and stares at him with questioning eyes.

"I was feeling a little lonely," Dave lies, because he's decided he won't ask Kurt anything while Kurt's still eating.

"We were just a few feet apart from each other," Kurt replies, amused. "You're done?"

"Yeah. It was good."

"It's always good. You definitely know the best take-out places."

Of course Dave knows, since he's a pig and even during the short period he's been in New York, he's binged on food from almost every place close and not so close to his apartment. He's sure that that's not what Kurt meant, but this is Dave's sad reality. He doesn't tell Kurt about this, though; Kurt knows enough.

"Do you mind if I stay here?"

Kurt shrugs. "If you like."

After the disastrous previous night, Dave expected Kurt to be a little apprehensive or distant. But they're both playing it cool so far, pretending that everything's fine.

Kurt looks down though, swallowing hard. "So what's up with you?"

Dave raises a brow. "With me?"

Kurt meets his gaze, his eyes look cold and Dave knows right away that Kurt can sense that the 'nothing wrong happened between us' facade is crumbling. It creeps him out how well Kurt can read him.

"Don't act the fool with me, Karofsky."

Last names. This is it; there's no point denying or pretending anymore so Dave nods. "I want to know what happened with you."

Kurt stares at him for the longest seconds, then he pushes his plate forwards and crosses his arms over his chest. "What happened with me? Nothing happened."

Kurt's not going to make this easy and that doesn't surprise Dave. He tries not to look nervous though. "You know what I mean."

"It's none of your business."

Dave rolls his eyes. "I want to know," he repeats.

"You know everything you need to know," Kurt states firmly. "I'm a whore. You pay me for sex. And to eat dinner with you, obviously," he points at his empty plate. "I'm not getting paid to talk about my personal life, so let's stick to business, shall we?"

Kurt doesn't know how hard it is for Dave to cope with not knowing. He doesn't know Dave spends every day they're not together going insane.

So Dave gets up and marches to the coat stand by the front door. He returns to the table with his wallet.

"Fine," Dave says, taking a fifty from his wallet and placing it on the table. "We'll stick to business. I pay you to fuck me and to have dinner with me, so I guess I can pay you for answers. How about fifty bucks a question?"

If looks could kill, Dave would be dead right now. Kurt's fuming, completely still in his seat and saying nothing.

"Why did you become a prostitute?" Dave asks straightforwardly.

"I'm not going to answer to that."

Dave nods, not really giving a damn by this point. "Fifty's not good enough?" he takes another fifty. "A hundred. More than what you get for a client at your club, so that's not bad for one question, right? Now, why did you turn into a prostitute?"

Kurt shifts uncomfortably in his place, pressing his lips tight and staring at Dave with disdain. "Screw you," he grits between his teeth.

Dave shrugs, taking out yet another fifty. Kurt winces when Dave lays the bill over the others, almost like it hurt him. Dave knows he's being a complete ass but he can't help it. "A hundred and fifty?"

"Stop it."

"No? How about two hundred?"

Dave's about to put down another fifty when Kurt yells at him. "I have a lot of debts! Happy? Now stop that!"

Kurt has debts… that's good. Well, it's not good that he has debts, but he's talking and it's a start.

"A hundred and fifty per question," Dave muses, acting cool just to conceal how guilty he feels. Dave won't let his mind drift to unknown places; he won't dwell on how what he's doing is humiliating and upsetting Kurt. Answers come first right now. "That's not so bad, right?"

"You freaking bastard," Kurt spits out, his voice full of venom.

"So you have debts," Dave says casually, taking another a hundred and fifty bucks from his wallet and placing them in front of Kurt. Kurt looks like he's raging. "What kind of debts?"

Kurt goes silent for several seconds and Dave is about to take out more money when Kurt speaks up: "Medical debts."

Dave nods as his mind starts working fast. So Kurt's not turning tricks to feed a drug habit or placate an angry pimp or something. That's comforting as far as it goes. Kurt has asthma, but how can that have fucked up his life so much? There are millions of people with asthma and surely they don't fall into crushing debt because of it. How sick is Kurt?

"You're sick," Dave states, trying to figure out how to phrase his next question and doing his best not to jump to conclusions that will make him worry to death. It's not comforting at all to know that Kurt is sick somehow. Yet, at that statement, Kurt looks away, like he's embarrassed. Dave places more money on the table. "What do you have?"

Kurt looks at the money like he's afraid of it, four hundred and fifty dollars so far right in front of him and he seems to get smaller with each bill Dave lays down. Dave knows he's being a complete douche, degrading the man he used to love just because he has the urge of being nosy. Dave hates himself, more than he usually does.

"It's complicated," Kurt says quietly.

Dave puts yet another hundred and fifty on the table and Kurt runs his hand over his face, exasperated and visibly nervous. "Is it because of the asthma?"

"Yes and no."

Dave sighs. This is difficult all over again, and Kurt must be less than pleased saying all this stuff to him, even if he's still saying too little for Dave to piece the story together. Dave's playing with Kurt's needs, just to fulfill his own needs; Dave's making Kurt tell him personal things, things that Kurt would never tell him if it wasn't for the fact that he needed the money.

He's the biggest jerk and Dave will punish himself for that later. But he can't stop now.

He's about to take more money out of his wallet when Kurt snatches his arm away.

"I'll tell you, alright? Just stop giving me money!" Kurt tells him, clearly upset.

Dave nods quietly. "Okay."

Kurt sighs tiredly and opens his mouth, just to close it right away, as if he didn't know where to start. Dave, in the meanwhile, tries to gather as much courage as he can, because deep down he's sure that Kurt won't tell him anything nice.

"I came to New York right after graduation. I was eighteen, and since I didn't get into the school I wanted, I entered Parsons. Fashion design, you know?" Kurt says with a cold voice, obviously hating to be telling this to anyone, but Dave just listens.

Fashion design, it makes sense to Dave and it's upsetting to know that once Kurt was on track and now he's like this.

"I was doing well," Kurt continues. "Incredible, I might say. But… I started falling sick. Winters in Ohio are bad, but here…" Kurt shivers and Dave frowns. "I never expected the freaking weather was going to get to me so much. During that first fall and winter I fell sick at least six or seven times; mostly flues or bronchitis. By the second year, I was diagnosed with adult on-set asthma."

Dave nods, not daring to interrupt Kurt.

"It was a shock. I've always been so healthy… but it wasn't that bad. I had school, I was getting an internship at Prada. Being constantly sick didn't help but I tried to make it work. But then, one night..." Kurt falls silent; he clenches his jaw as if what's he's about to say is too difficult, and Dave almost asks Kurt not to say anything anymore but Kurt keeps talking. "I got really sick. I had… I don't know anymore, bronchitis, bronchiolitis, something like that, and I had an asthma attack. My inhaler didn't help and I couldn't breathe, so I rushed to the ER. I ended up intubated."

Dave gapes. He doesn't know much about medicine, but he's seen TV shows like _ER_, _House MD_ and _Grey's Anatomy_ and usually when doctors yell 'We have to intubate!' things are pretty bad. He hates the image of Kurt in his head as one of those patients on TV with tubes taped over their mouths.

"Shit. Because of an asthma attack?"

Kurt shrugs, looking almost defeated. "It was a mix of things, or so the doctors said. When you are under mechanical ventilation, you have to stay in the ICU, you know? And it wouldn't have been so bad, but I caught hospital-acquired pneumonia."

Dave only stares at Kurt, who's not looking at him but at his lap. "You know how there are different kinds of pneumonia? Hospital-acquired pneumonias are especially hard to fight off. They're more resistant to antibiotics. I ended up in a coma. I was in the ICU _in a coma_ for almost three months. My family came, and I really don't know how my dad coped with that," Kurt says, his voice empty of all emotion and Dave's stomach is almost strangling itself in concern.

"But …you got better."

Kurt snorts, looking at him with a quirked brow. "Better is a very relative term. I came out of the coma and got discharged; my family went back to Ohio and… well, I tried to resume my life. But I had been absent from work for almost three months and I got fired-"

"What? You were sick," Dave states, scandalized. After all Kurt went through! "They can't fire you for being sick!"

"Well, they didn't _fire_ me exactly. It was a twelve-month internship. My contract was almost over and they decided not to renew it. Instead, they gave my position to my then-boyfriend, because while I was in the hospital he was busy fucking his way up the career ladder," Kurt tells him bitterly and Dave cannot believe that douche. "But that wasn't the worst part. Two weeks after being discharged, I was unemployed plus I had a high rent to pay and no money, and I got this… letter that said I owed a ridiculous amount of money because of my medical treatment."

Dave shakes his head in confusion. "Didn't you have health insurance?"

Kurt lets out an icy laugh. "Have you ever watched Michael Moore's 'Sicko'?" Dave shakes his head no. "You should. Even with the best coverage, health insurance never pays for all the treatment, and I had nowhere near the best coverage. Do you know how much does a day in the ICU and with mechanical ventilation costs?"

Dave swallows hard. "Not really."

"A whole freaking lot. My insurance did pay, but that didn't take care of even half the total cost. So I ended up with an outrageously huge debt."

"How much?"

Kurt gives him a sad smile. "_That_ I won't tell you, no matter how much money you offer me."

"Kurt –"

"So I was unemployed, with an expensive rent and a huge debt. I didn't want to tell my father; he had a second heart attack, not long before I ended up in hospital. He was recovering from that and had to see his son in a coma for months... I didn't want to stress him even more; he still doesn't know."

Dave remembers how concerned Kurt was over the prospect of his father finding out he's a hooker now. It makes Dave feel like hell that Kurt is dealing with all this by himself.

But Kurt's really close with his Dad, so how does that even work? "So what? You said you talk to him, you mentioned that he called you or something. You tell him you're doing great?"

Kurt flinches; obviously this is a sensitive point. But then Kurt shrugs, like he doesn't care anymore. "He thinks I'm living a fabulous life, working for Prada. That because I'm so busy, I never have time to visit him, not at Thanksgiving or Christmas, even, because I'm working on the upcoming collections or traveling to France for fashion shows or doing whatever other elaborate fiction I can make up," he says, letting out a sad laugh.

It's sad, because that "elaborate fiction," that's how Kurt's life is _supposed_ to be.

"Why didn't you declare bankruptcy?" Dave inquires, because there must be other options besides whoring himself.

"I was twenty years old, David. It would have ruined me for life; how could I ever, I don't know, apply for a credit card or buy a car or get a housing loan, or do anything with a bankruptcy on my record?"

"It's ruining your life already!"

"It's not forever! Eventually, I'll pay the whole thing off," Kurt states firmly and proudly. "That freaking bill won't stop me, I won't let that happen. I'm working hard to get rid of it and then I'll move on with the rest of my life."

Dave pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to calm himself down because this is ridiculous. Kurt stares at him defiantly and it's obvious that he's very determined about this, but for fucks sake!

"You're whoring yourself," Dave states as calmly as he can. "What on earth were you thinking when you decided _that_ was a good idea? I get that you have debts but-"

"You don't," Kurt cuts him off. "Look where you live, how you dress… your car… what do you know about having to squeeze the most out of every cent you have to get through the month? You probably work hard to have all this. Well, I work hard to have what I've got. It might not be a lot right now, but that's how life is."

"You're whoring yourself," Dave repeats and Kurt gives him an icy smile.

"You keep saying that like it bothers you, but I notice you don't seem very reluctant each time you take me to bed. We both get something out of this situation so it's not really that bad, right?"

Dave quickly shuts his mouth because Kurt's got him there. What can Dave say? That this is the only way he can have him? Dave won't admit that to Kurt. The truth is Dave never felt disgusted with Kurt for being a hooker, it disgusted him that Kurt had to do such a thing. The mere idea of Kurt getting fucked by strangers every night still makes him sick, but Kurt's right – Dave's not exactly suffering from Kurt's hardship, not in that way, anyway.

"I've just..." Dave doesn't know what to say. "Okay, how did you even end up in that horrible club."

Kurt shrugs like it's not a big deal.

"I needed money," Kurt tells him matter-of-factly. It really disturbs Dave how Kurt freaking Hummel, the fabulous guy who used to strut around the hallways of McKinley with his superior air, chin raised, proud and strong, has come to accept this as his life. "I was only twenty, always been a daddy's boy. I thought so little about money, I even had an apartment in Manhattan that I could hardly afford but it was trendy. But then suddenly I had to face this huge thing, all by myself. I had all this money I had to pay, and my priorities changed. I just grew up."

Dave snorts, not believing his ears. "Grew up? You call turning into a prostitute growing up?"

Kurt glares at him. "I call taking responsibility of your acts growing up."

"Your acts?" This guy is going to drive Dave insane. "You didn't do anything wrong! You fell terribly sick!"

"It doesn't matter what happened! There were still consequences and I had to deal them!"

God, Dave's going to lose his mind, but he tries to calm down because he really wants to stop them yelling at each other. "I just…"

"I work at a strip club, so what?" Kurt asks defiantly. "I had and still have huge debts. I did what was necessary. I moved to the cheapest place I could find, got a job where they wouldn't fire me if I had to skip work when I got sick, which is way too often, by the way. It wasn't enough, so I looked for another job and The VIP came along. Night shifts paid more, and waiting tables couldn't be so difficult, right?"

"Waiting tables?" Dave inquires with disdain.

Kurt shrugs again. "That was all I did at first. But then lap dances meant extra money in my pocket, so why not? And then performing on stage was more money as well."

"And fucking clients is more money as well, right?"

Kurt stares at him quietly, with no emotion in his eyes. "It's not something that makes me proud, but yeah. I've found that being a whore, it's more money, sadly."

They both fall into an uncomfortable silence that Kurt breaks after several seconds. "Are we done or do you have more questions?" Kurt inquires and honestly, Dave doesn't know what more to ask.

He did get some answers, the uncertainty is gone, but what changes because of it? Nothing. Kurt will keep on whoring himself until his debt is paid, and that scares Dave.

"How's your health now?"

"Flu, bronchitis and stuff… I get sick more often than not, but I get by," Kurt states, getting up from his chair. "I'm not sick now though."

Dave stares up into Kurt's flirty eyes in shock. How can Kurt do this? He just poured out all these bad things about his life and now he's hitting on him?

Kurt straddles Dave's lap, throwing his arms around his neck and even if Dave was far from being horny, he's slowly getting there now because Kurt being so close always has that effect on him. Kurt's gazing seductive and then he reduces the distance between them, running his tongue over Dave's neck.

Dave moans.

* * *

><p>This is what Kurt needs: Dave moaning under his touch.<p>

Kurt needs to be Dave's hooker, his good and confident whore. It is much better than being himself - the broken, ill guy who lets another guy pay him for sex in order not to feel so alone.

Kurt never wanted to let Dave - his _client_ - into his life.

It wasn't and still isn't anybody else's business, but Kurt was just forced to display all the misery of his life, to strip himself bare, to reveal all his issues and vulnerabilities.

At the same time, part of him is glad he told Dave. Now there's nothing else to hide – except the fact that he's not _actually_ a hooker, except for Dave - and it's almost refreshing, in a sad way, that for the first time _someone_ knows about _all_ of him.

Back in Lima, his family think he's living a big life in New York and has turned into a cold-hearted bitch who won't even visit his parents for Christmas. They don't know what's really going on with him. In New York, he only has his coworkers and neighbors, and they know him as the broke kid who works a lot and gets sick all the time, unaware of the person he used to be years ago. No one knows both parts of his life; everyone sees him as two different people. But now Dave knows. Dave knows who Kurt was then and who he is now, and that he's just one person.

It's a relief.

But it also makes him weak, and Kurt can't be weak or all the weight of his life will fall over him, crushing him.

So he told Dave almost everything, but he never showed any weakness. Kurt won't let Dave pity him even more than he does already, which is why he had to stop Dave from paying him to answer questions.

So Kurt grinds Dave's lap, focusing on his hooker persona instead of all the things he just spilled about his life.

Dave groans, gripping him hard by his hips and Kurt moans in pleasure, quickly attaching his mouth to Dave's, kissing him hard. Yes, this is exactly what Kurt needs, and he revels in the fact that he's learned to do it well.

Dave slides his hands under Kurt's ass and gets up from the chair, lifting Kurt in the air in the process. Kurt grins, clasping his legs around Dave's waist, feeling hot and stupidly giddy because it's ridiculous how much he enjoys when Dave lifts him up; Dave's strength is incredibly arousing.

They quickly make it to the bedroom and get undressed in almost record time. Maybe Kurt's wrong, but it feels like Dave needs to forget about their conversation just as much as he does.

Kurt is desperate for Dave to be inside him, so when Dave starts to kiss his chest and hips, Kurt squirms in pleasure, not being able to take much of this rushed foreplay.

"Dave, please," Kurt gasps, naked and hot underneath the other man. "Just fuck me now."

"Fuck, yes," Dave grunts, getting the lube from his bedside table and pouring it onto his fingers.

Kurt rolls onto his hands and knees. He's learning to love this position, because while in the past getting it from behind seemed impersonal and well, _slutty,_ it feels fantastic when Dave fucks him this way. And to be honest, he actually enjoys being slutty for Dave.

"So fucking hot," Kurt hears Dave whispering and Dave's desire makes him shiver.

Dave kneels behind Kurt and starts probing his entrance.

"Oh, God!" Kurt moans in anticipation, wishing he didn't need any preparation so he could take Dave right now.

Dave slides one and then two fingers in, moving in a circular motion, and Kurt's neediness overrides any discomfort he might be feeling. But then Dave replaces his fingers with his tongue and Kurt sees white.

He rocks back in order to get more contact with Dave's tongue but then it's gone. Kurt lets out a frustrated groan, but he listens to Dave opening the condom and that gets him more worked up.

Then Dave presses his cock against his hole, pushing slowly inside and Kurt has to fight the urge to impale himself on Dave. They both moan loudly once Dave gets all the way inside him, holding Kurt's hips to steady himself.

Dave's thrusts are painfully slow; so slow that the pleasure lingers for longer, driving Kurt almost insane; but he doesn't complain about the steady, sturdy and slow pace that Dave's building. Kurt doesn't want to be in charge right now, he wants Dave to lead the way. He's so exhausted with his own life that he's relieved to let someone else control what he's doing, even if what he's doing is a three hundred dollar fuck.

Dave's filling him so much; the pressure is so intense that Kurt believes he could come right now, being hard as rock already and he hasn't even touched himself yet. Dave's moans echo in his ears, making him moan as well, every time louder, almost begging for more, faster and harder.

Finally, Dave catches on to Kurt's needs and he starts thrusting faster.

"Oh, God, yes," Kurt grunts, pushing himself backwards to meet Dave's thrusts.

Dave holds him then by his shoulders, pulling Kurt deeper against him. Dave must recognize his urgency, even if Kurt's not demanding anything out loud, because Dave starts pounding his cock harshly inside Kurt's ass, making Kurt almost whimper in ecstasy.

Kurt feels himself drowning in a puddle of messy bliss. He focuses solely on the feeling in his ass, Dave brushing his prostate over and over, and the hardness of his own cock, that makes him let out crude, loud moans.

"Dave," Kurt pants. "Fuck, _Dave._"

Dave's nails dig deeper into the flesh of his shoulders and the pain drives him wild. He would fist his cock right now if it wasn't for the fact that if he removes a hand from the mattress, he'll lose all balance.

But then, all of a sudden, Dave pulls out completely and Kurt's about to complain when Dave grabs him by his waist and, in a quick motion, flips him over. Kurt lands on his back and Dave's immediately pushing Kurt's legs apart, burying himself between them until his cock is once again deep inside Kurt.

Kurt wastes no time wrapping his legs around Dave's hips, locking his ankles tightly and pulling him as close as he can. His cock is trapped between his and Dave's bellies, but Dave's thrusts apply friction to his neglected cock and it's incredible.

He feels so close to coming that he wants to cry, because Dave's found his way to his prostate all over again, crushing it over and over. He really doesn't want this to end just yet.

"I don't want to come," Kurt moans, and it sounds like a desperate cry.

Dave lies on top of him, propping onto his elbows on either side of Kurt's head. Dave's hot breath is right in his face as he whispers: "You'll come when I want you to, doll."

Kurt moans instantly at Dave's severe tone of voice. It was low, but firm. Dave's in charge and Kurt feels like he's going to burn up.

"I'm going to make you come so many times tonight you won't be able to get up for days," Dave grunts at Kurt's ear, his voice hoarse.

Dave's words hit him like a slap and he squirms in pleasure; his brain is melting in lust. He mewls because, yes, he wants that. "Yes," Kurt sobs, going insane at Dave's words and thrusts. "Please, please do that."

Kurt needs that; he needs to forget about everything in his life and just concentrate on this pleasure. Kurt wants Dave to make him forget about all the things they talked about and all the troubles that wait for him on the other side of Dave's door.

Dave kisses him on his cheek, then he runs his tongue over Kurt's jaw. Dave holds Kurt by his chin, and proceeds to kiss him hard on the mouth, sticking his tongue inside, and Kurt kisses him back eagerly.

Dave breaks the kiss, and his thrusts become slow again and steady, but Dave doesn't pull out. Kurt has his eyes shut, trying not to go insane because the combination of Dave's weight over him, the heat coming from his body, and Dave's breath against his face, along with the slow and shallow thrust are pushing him to the edge.

The room falls silent and all Kurt can hear is their breathing.

And then Kurt feels it. Dave's hand is now firmly around his neck; all Kurt's thoughts stop immediately. Dave's doing this again and Kurt didn't need to ask; the joy and pleasure is overwhelming.

Dave starts pounding harder and faster, making the friction on Kurt's trapped cock increase. He's muttering words at Kurt's ear, but Kurt can't process them. All he can sense is Dave's tight grip around his neck, blocking oxygen from reaching his brain.

It's once again incredible. He normally fears not being able to breathe properly, but this… it's perfect. Neither fate nor bad luck nor ill health are preventing him from breathing. Dave is controlling his air, controlling _him_, and it's as comforting as it is mind-blowing.

Kurt grows even hotter as his orgasm is right there ready to explode. He starts feeling dizzy but he smiles in bliss, letting himself go, surrendering to the pleasure he's feeling. Dave's thrusting harder and deeper and all the sensations and feelings become too overwhelming for Kurt: his wrecked prostate, the friction on his cock, the lack of air, Dave's tight grip around his neck, Dave's… control.

His orgasm hits him like a train. "Dave, oh, fuck!" Kurt grits through his teeth breathlessly as he comes and his body goes rigid, every cell clenching in the boldest lust.

Kurt's trembling when Dave releases his grip on his throat, but keeps his fingers on his chin, holding him tightly.

"Deep breaths, Kurt," Dave commands and Kurt nods, knowing that if he starts breathing too fast, he'll trigger an asthma attack or hyperventilate.

He takes deep, slow breaths, even if it's hard, since he can hardly coordinate as Dave moves away from on top of him. Kurt still has his eyes shut. He can hear Dave panting, but close to him. He starts noticing the wet come on his belly growing cold, but he can't bring himself to care.

Little by little, his body starts easing and his breath turns normal. Dave is suddenly next to him, wrapping arms around him, pushing against him until they're chest to chest, and Kurt hugs him back weakly as Dave starts kissing him all over his chin and his abused neck. Kurt smiles at this affection.

Just like the last time, Dave seems bothered at having choked him and Kurt wishes he wasn't.

"I'll bring you some water," Dave mumbles, sounding guilty.

Kurt wants to say something, but he's still a bit dazed from both the lack of air and the striking orgasm. He misses Dave's warmth, though.

He wipes his belly with the sheet, since it's the closest thing he can find, and sits up straight in bed right when Dave hands him the glass of water. Kurt drinks it down, while Dave disappears into the bathroom, just to come out seconds later sporting a new clean T-shirt.

Then he sits on the bed across from Kurt. "Are you okay?"

Kurt puts the empty glass of water on the bedside table and lays back on the mattress. "I'm perfect, David."

Dave still looks troubled. "I'm sorry, I got carried away. I shouldn't have-"

"Stop saying you're sorry," Kurt cuts him off. He's content and well laid; very well laid. He doesn't want any more drama. God knows they both have enough drama in their respective lives.

"But your asthma... you have breathing problems and-"

"Stop it!" Kurt cuts him off again, firmer this time. "It doesn't hurt me! If you want to know, smoke makes me sick. Cold weather does to, and sometimes I'm just standing around doing nothing and still I need to get my inhaler to clear my lungs, so stop worrying about this. I like it; I'm glad you did it. It feels good. If anything, you should do it more often," he adds in a playful tone of voice to ease the tension.

"It's not good to abuse it," Dave tells him, obviously knowing much more about this kink. Kurt is tempted to ask, but he doesn't.

Kurt runs his hand over Dave's thigh. "Whenever you feel like doing it, just know that I actually love it."

Dave presses his lips tight, not fully convinced but definitely not as troubled as he was seconds before. "I should take a shower. Want to go first?"

Kurt snorts. "Even if I wanted to, I don't think I could move."

Dave leans over, kissing him on his forehead. "Then rest a bit. I'll be back in a few."

With that, Dave gets up and heads to the bathroom, but when he's about to reach the door, Kurt speaks up. "Did you even come?"

He realizes that he never heard or felt Dave coming. He wants to slap himself, because he's the hooker and once again, he left Dave unsatisfied. But Dave laughs loudly, making him frown.

"Seriously? I guess you had hell of an orgasm if you didn't even hear me moaning. I came, believe me!"

Well, that's kind of embarrassing but Kurt really didn't hear Dave. Apparently he was too wrapped up in his own pleasure.

When he hears the water running, Kurt lays his head on the pillow, covering himself with the blankets, and without even noticing he starts drifting into a heavy sleep.

* * *

><p>Kurt is very sore when he wakes up in the morning. Dave kept his promise and made him come four times the previous night; Kurt's cock is sore and so are his legs, and his ass. He doesn't mind, though, because it's a nice ache.<p>

There's a lot of sunlight coming through the windows and he frowns. This is not the first time he's woken up in Dave's bed, but it usually isn't so bright. When his eyes find the alarm clock he practically jumps. Ten past eleven! He can't hear anything but silence, and it's obvious that Dave has gone.

Kurt scrambles out of bed and instantly starts coughing. He actually needs to stand still for a few minutes, because the coughing doesn't seem to end, and he can feel the phlegm clogging up his throat.

He's definitely getting sick.

Once his lungs give him a break, Kurt finds a grey cardigan hanging from Dave's armchair and takes it just to cover himself with something. It's lovely. In spite of being way too big for him since the cardigan ends half way down his tights, the sleeves are too long and the neck opening almost hangs loose from his shoulders, the knitting is lovely and incredibly warm, and it smells like Dave's Hugo Boss.

Kurt closes the cardigan around him, and walks around Dave's presumably empty apartment.

This is weird. Why didn't Dave wake him up? Dave usually wakes him up when he gets ready for work, and they leave at the same time. It gives Kurt time to go back to his place, take a shower and kill some time until he has to go to MetFood. But Dave clearly let him sleep in.

He spots a paper bag from Starbucks on Dave's dining table and when Kurt picks it up, he finds a note underneath, plus a bunch of bills of one hundred dollar bills. He avoids the money, but takes the note and reads:

'_Kurt: You were too worn out, I didn't want to wake you up. Hope I won't get you in trouble if you have to work today. I got you some breakfast; feel free to take a bath or to do anything you want. I won't be back until six, so the house is yours. The street door opens from the inside, so you won't need a key. Be safe, and see you soon. Dave.'_

Kurt's chest aches painfully. He peeks inside the Starbucks bag and there's a grande coffee and two muffins. Kurt hasn't had a Starbucks grande anything in several years, because five dollars for coffee is pretty freaking outrageous when you're trying to save money. The coffee is cold, but he still takes it and pads to the kitchen to reheat it in the microwave. On the way, he coughs more and louder.

He can already feel his nose growing runny.

Yet he feels awful for things that go beyond his health. It's uncomfortable to be in Dave's apartment alone, without Dave. It's uncomfortable to be _comfortable_ in Dave's apartment, with or without Dave, because Kurt's certainly not hurrying to get dressed and leave.

The microwave beeps and Kurt takes his coffee, which happens to be a simple mocha. Dave doesn't know his favorite coffee, but Kurt likes mocha and it tastes just as good as Kurt remembers.

He sits at Dave's table, observing the empty apartment. It looks different in daylight; brighter and homey. Kurt also notices how warm he's feeling, which surprises him since he's wearing nothing but Dave's cardigan. He'd never walk around nearly naked at his place. No matter how hot it is outside, that freaking apartment feels like a refrigerator all the time.

But then he hears the smooth buzzing coming from the vent and of course, Dave turned the heat up for him. Kurt can't say he hates the warmth, but he does hate that Dave did such a thing.

Kurt continues drinking his coffee, taking the two muffins from the bag. One seems to be buttermilk blueberry and the other banana with chocolate chips.

The idea makes his stomach flip. Dave actually got up, went to Starbucks, came back with breakfast for him, and then went to work. All the trouble Dave took makes him feel uneasy.

Why is Dave pampering him so much? Maybe he feels guilty for all the things he made Kurt say last night? Kurt picks up the money, just to count it, and his hands tremble when he counts nine hundred dollars.

A hundred and fifty per question, and Kurt answered four. It's like he keeps finding new ways to shamelessly steal money from Dave, first for sex, then for eating Dave's food, and now for just talking; at least Kurt feels that way. He quickly puts the money in the table as if it burned.

Kurt's not a hooker _per se_; Dave should not be paying him anything. Kurt would do any of the things they do together for free, and that realization makes him feel disgusted. Not with Dave or the fact that he's doing all this with Dave; he's disgusted with himself. How the hell is he going to get out of this situation?

The money thing wounds his spirit pretty badly, but he can't tell Dave that he's never been a hooker. That would be admitting that he's actually been stealing his money all this time; that they could have had random sex from the beginning but Kurt chose to let him pay.

And he's a hooker in Dave's eyes. If Dave wanted a date, he would surely not choose a guy who supposedly gets fucked who knows how many times every night for seventy bucks.

It's not like Kurt wants to date Dave. It's just that maybe if money wasn't involved, if he wasn't supposed to be a hooker, all this wouldn't feel so wrong.

Despite his misgivings, Kurt decides to hang out in Dave's apartment. It's warm and comfortable, and he could go from here to MetFood. What's the point of stopping by his apartment? It's cold and depressing and Kurt hates being there most of the time. He wouldn't ever go back to his place if it weren't for the fact that he needs somewhere to sleep.

Kurt finishes his breakfast, and starts coughing some more. He wipes his nose, which is getting really runny, and he curses his life. Hopefully he'll make it through the day.

He takes Dave's advice and runs a bath. He should probably go for the shower, since it makes more steam and that's good for his lungs, but he doesn't get to have warm baths often, so why not?

But just when he's about to step into the tub, his eyes fall on the cabinet and he remembers all the pills Dave has inside there. Kurt also realizes that the clean tees Dave keeps changing into are under the counter.

There are tears rolling down his cheeks when he steps into the warm bath.

This situation is killing him.

Here he is prowling around a nice apartment in the best part of Brooklyn like he owned it; a place that reminds him how different his life is, because this is not his apartment. This apartment belongs to _his client. _Kurt lives in a sketchy part of the Bronx,because he's just the _hooker._

Now Dave knows everything about his life, and that's simply not fair, because Kurt still doesn't know what Dave's job is, or if he's out or not, or why he's so sad that he needs to take so many pills. There's also the bulimia thing that freaks Kurt out.

It's simply not fair. Kurt was already at a disadvantage with Dave by the mere fact of being the hooker in this relationship, but now it's even worse, because Dave knows all about his messed up life and Kurt is defenseless.

The warm bath feels soothing and comfortable. Kurt cries harder. Being in this place, with or without Dave, is so confusing. He should run away in order to stop feeling so bad about himself, and he would leave, if it wasn't for the fact that at the same time, he wants to stay.

He wants to stay here very much, and that just kills him.


	11. Chapter 10

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> Nc17.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression. Breath play.  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> S1 and S2.  
><strong>Beta:<strong> Ella Greggs.  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 11ooo this chapter.  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Romance/Angst/Drama.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Pft! If I owned Glee, Dave would be back.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been five yearssince Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves and when they meet again, Dave mistakes Kurt for a hooker. Kurt doesn't tell him different.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10<strong>

Kurt gets sick.

He lays in bed propped up by pillows, covered with several blankets and holding the mask of his nebulizer to his face. Under his arm he has a toilet paper roll, since he blows his nose so many times and toilet paper is cheaper than Kleenex. There's an ever-growing pile of used 'tissue' balls on his nightstand.

This is nothing new to Kurt, but still every and each time he falls sick he hates it. He can't stop coughing, it's hard to breathe and his body aches all over, as usual. He went from Dave's apartment to MetFood the previous day, but during the course of the afternoon his coughing got louder and nastier and it was a good thing it was his night off at The VIP. If his cough isn't too ugly, he can still work at MetFood, at least in the stockroom, as long as he can stay steady on his feet; but he can't cough on customers' faces while dancing on their laps. The bad thing is that The VIP pays better.

He hates both jobs, but he hates The VIP more, because financially he needs The VIP more.

Now that the cold is in full swing, he'll be missing both jobs for probably an entire week and all the pay that goes with them. That's presuming this cold stays a cold, instead of turning into something worse. Kurt doesn't want to think about the alternative.

His phone vibrates somewhere under the pile of used 'tissues' and when Kurt grabs it his heart sinks. It's Dave. He's completely forgotten today is Wednesday and he's supposed to be at Dave's. At least, that's the routine they've built - he spends Monday and Wednesday nights with Dave. But he's been feeling so sick yesterday and today that he completely forgot.

Dave's text says: _See you tonight?_

He feels kind of bad for not being able to go to Dave's tonight, but he can't really do much when he's constantly coughing his lungs out of his chest. Yet, it surprises him how disappointed he is about not being able to see Dave.

Kurt texts back: _I'm sorry, I won't be able to make it tonight._

It takes a few minutes for Dave to reply. _Next Monday then?_

Kurt chuckles; part of him doesn't want to tell Dave he's sick, but today is Wednesday and it's possible he won't be better by Monday. If this is just a cold, he'll probably stay in bed for a week, maybe less; if he gets persistent fever… then probably a few days more. Hopefully it's going to be just the flu, because he really doesn't want to buy costly antibiotics.

But Dave knows about his health now, so he believes he won't be losing much by telling Dave what's going on. At least Kurt won't be lying to him.

_I caught a cold. If I feel better by Monday, I'll let you know._

This time, Dave replies almost instantly. _Are you okay? Do you need something?_

Dave's concern is, like always, as endearing as it is annoying. Kurt comes down with flues and colds and bronchitis at least once every two months, and it has been that way for the last five years. At this point, he can handle himself perfectly well, thank you very much.

_I'm fine. I just need some bed rest._

_Please let me know how you're doing._ Dave texts him.

_I will. Have a great week._ Kurt replies, knowing he won't be updating Dave with the latest news about his health.

_You too, and get better soon._

Kurt hopes he'll get better soon. It sort of bothers him now to acknowledge that he could easily be at Dave's apartment tonight, comfortable and with someone. Loneliness always hits him harder when he gets sick, and a few weeks ago that was just the way it was because Kurt never socialized with anyone. But Dave is back in his life now and Kurt has started enjoying spending time with someone again.

Kurt groans, coughing loudly once more. His lungs and throat start aching again and he wishes Dave hadn't text him, because now he doesn't only has to deal with his physical state, but also he gets to feel ten times more lonely than he did before.

Suddenly, Kurt _really_ wishes he were able to see Dave tonight. It's a stupid longing, since he's sick and they wouldn't do anything, but surely Dave would be all caring with him, Kurt knows that much. But maybe, even if it would annoy Kurt deeply, it would be nice to have someone around when he's sick for once. Kurt doesn't even want someone to nurse him, he just wants Dave around to commiserate with him while he's stuck in bed.

Kurt blinks at that thought. Well, he doesn't want _Dave_ specifically, of course. Dave just happens to be around somehow…

* * *

><p>By Friday, Dave feels like he's going insane. Kurt's ill and that thought doesn't let him be. Dave's sure that Kurt won't let him know if he needs something, and ever since Kurt texted telling him he's sick, the only thing Dave does is wonder how sick Kurt is, if someone is helping him, if he has everything he needs, if he's in pain, if he's getting worse… Deep down, Dave knows that Kurt has no one to rely on and it kills Dave, because he doesn't even know where Kurt lives. Otherwise, he could take him some soup, or maybe tuck him in bed. Both incredibly ridiculous, but Dave feels the urge to do something, anything, to make Kurt at least a little better.<p>

It wasn't just bad enough finding out that Kurt's health is fragile and that he gets sick quite often; the worst part was when Kurt told him one time the flu was so bad he ended up in a coma. The thought of Kurt being in the ICU comatose and intubated makes Dave literally sick; if that happened once, it could happen again, so Dave tries not to think about that, since ever time he does, he goes a little dizzy.

Dave figured that Kurt was getting sick. Kurt might have not noticed, but the last night they spent together, Dave woke up several times because Kurt was coughing in his sleep. So he resolved that letting Kurt sleep in at his place was a good thing to do. Dave even got some breakfast for him and turned on the heater to keep him warm. Dave finally understands why Kurt hates being cold so much. The weather is turning cold now and Kurt's health is turning bad. It kind of breaks Dave's heart in a lot of pieces.

And just like Dave predicted, knowing what went down with Kurt's life, it didn't change anything. It's been a couple of days since they talked and Dave still worries.

Dave doesn't speculate anymore, but he's concerned about Kurt's health.

As soon as he arrives home from work, Dave pulls out his cellphone because he can't take it anymore and starts texting Kurt. He deletes the message several times because he doesn't know what to say or to ask that won't sound clingy or nosy. After all, Kurt's supposed to be just his hooker, and Dave doesn't want Kurt to know how much he cares for him because he would look utterly pathetic at Kurt's eyes. Dave figures it's bad enough being fat and sweaty around Kurt.

Eventually he decides to try sounding casual: _Hey. How are you feeling?_

Kurt doesn't answer. Not right away, and Dave starts anguishing. What if Kurt's in the hospital? Five, ten, fifteen minutes pass without an answer but Dave doesn't dare call because it would be too desperate for him to call Kurt or to text him again so soon. Maybe Kurt is just away from his phone, or in the shower, or sleeping… or at the ER.

To release the tension, Dave calls Outback Steakhouse and orders baby back ribs with french fries. He's hungry and anxious and he has eaten almost nothing since Wednesday.

Twenty minutes later his phone vibrates and Dave breathes, relieved, as he sees that Kurt just replied.

_Sorry, I didn't hear the phone. Still in bed, still sick but not at my worst. I'm doing a little better. Missing me?_

That's reassuring. In fact, that's _very _reassuring, because in a matter of minutes Kurt went from coughing to hospitalized in Dave's mind.

Then Dave blushes furiously. Surely Kurt's just being flirty, sticking to his job, but… he actually _does_ miss Kurt. Spending last Wednesday without Kurt was almost unbearable, because of the mere knowledge that Kurt could have been at home with him. Instead, Dave spent his night devouring several pizzas.

But Dave cannot look that desperate so he texts back:

_Obviously. My bed is cold without you._

Dave tries to stick to the sexual part; their agreement. Kurt is the greatest lay, so it would be sensible for him as the client to miss that part.

_Ha! You do have a hand, you know? It's been not even a week._

Dave laughs at Kurt's text, and he's glad that Kurt's not thinking that he's desperate for him in particular, even if he is.

_My hand can't compare to you, jeez. And what can I say? I'm insatiable._

That's good. They're sticking to the sex, both of them, and though he wishes Kurt wasn't his prostitute, Dave wouldn't have Kurt if he wasn't, so he tries not to think much about that since that thought does no good; Dave can't make Kurt stop whoring himself and he can't make Kurt like him either, so he just has to accept this reality, since it is, sadly, the best he can get.

_So true! I'll let you know if I'm better on Monday._

At least Kurt doesn't sound annoyed or upset by his neediness. Dave can't tell much from a couple of texts, but Kurt replied and flirted with him so he can't be too sick. 'Too sick' as 'need to intubate,' since that was what was worrying Dave.

He's glad that Kurt stayed at his place last Tuesday morning for at least a little while, long enough to eat breakfast anyway. Maybe they could do that again; after all, they've built a routine that includes them having dinner together. Kurt could stay at Dave's apartment while Dave's at work. Dave considers buying a coffee machine so Kurt can have nice coffee on the mornings, since it's the least he deserves. Dave's co-workers are constantly talking about how incredible the Nespresso is and he wonders if Kurt would like that.

_If_ Kurt stays during mornings, of course. Kurt sometimes seems uncomfortable making himself at home if Dave's there, not wanting to take baths, for example. It must be hard for Kurt to forget he's a prostitute and not supposed to do anything unless his client tells him it's okay. But Dave would like Kurt to stay at his place and be comfortable there. He never lived with anyone since moving out of his parents' house and the company feels good.

Kurt's company feels good in spite of all the issues between them.

Yes, Kurt could stay during mornings if he wants to. It could really work. There's already a precedent for it, even if that first time Dave was just trying to ease his conscience after forcing Kurt to tell about his private life. But now that they've done it once, it might be something they could keep on doing.

God, it's been a little more than a month since they started seeing each other, only one short month since Dave's life turned upside down. It seems longer, but now Dave can't imagine his life without Kurt and that's quite alarming because he knows he's falling hard.

Things are not okay, not with him, not with Kurt and not with the both of them together, and for some reason, Dave does not believe that it's going to get any better. This can't end well, and more than likely it won't.

Hopefully, Kurt will remain as healthy as he can, and the only thing Dave can do is help Kurt stay healthy, as long as Kurt lets him.

* * *

><p>When Kurt heads to Dave's apartment the following Wednesday, he's a bundle of nerves. He hates to admit that he wanted to get better really badly not just to return to work and stop losing so much money, but also to see Dave again. Kurt shouldn't miss Dave; it's certainly not right, and it's pretty confusing, but he always finds some comfort in Dave's familiarity and how Dave links him to his good past, even if that reinforces how bad his present is.<p>

Kurt tries to conceal his giddiness and hopefully he's succeeding. He doesn't beat himself up too hard about feeling content for this; he has the right to feel content about _something_, so sue him for wanting to see Dave after spending almost a week all by himself, seeing only his neighbor just once or twice.

But he's as nervous to see Dave as he is impatient, because payback is a bitch and Kurt is determined now to get information from Dave.

He had a lot of time to think about his situation with Dave during the past few days while being locked in the solitude of his apartment under a bunch of blankets. His plan began to form on Thursday night when he coughed so hard that he threw up. It's not something odd; sometimes when his coughing is really _really_ ugly, his gag reflex kicks in and he ends up vomiting, usually just nasty phlegm and whatever he ate or drank. It doesn't happen often, but when it happens, Kurt hates it.

Kurt was there in his bathroom and his throat ached terribly, also his stomach, and the pain coming from his abs muscles suddenly constricting was terrible, and all that made him instantly think about Dave.

How can Dave do that to himself?

Throwing up - it's already ugly and painful when you don't want it, how can you possibly inflict it voluntarily on yourself? Kurt has read plenty of pamphlets in the ER and he knows generally about plenty of diseases, but this little moment he had in the bathroom made him consider a lot of things that he'd never actually considered before. Kurt knows that if Dave's bulimic, he must have some serious self-esteem issues, he surely sees his body in a very different way than it actually is and feels conflicted about how he looks; and Kurt knows for a fact about Dave's binging and purging.

But that Thursday, Kurt came to understand Dave's illness on a deeper level. He never really considered the _physical pain_ of throwing up until it happened to him, and that was just a little of phlegm… He can only imagine how painful it must be for Dave to feel three entire cheesecakes or a full Indian meal coming up his throat. That thought was not pleasant at all. Dave must be in pain, psychological, maybe, and emotionally, considering he's obviously bulimic, even if they never mentioned that word. Dave does take pills prescribed by a shrink. But there's also the physical pain now.

Kurt shouldn't even care, not after all the misery Dave put him through the last time they were together. Yet, the idea of Dave being in pain upsets Kurt for some reason.

It doesn't end with Dave's bulimia though; that's just the tip of the iceberg. Kurt knows that's the topic he'd get the least answers about if he asked, but he knows nothing else about Dave, either. Nothing. It really bothers him that Dave knows the worst of his life, while he's completely in the dark about Dave's. It's simply not fair, and Kurt is sick of being at a disadvantage, because he's always at a disadvantage – as the guy with fragile health, or the guy with debts, and now as the guy who is Dave's whore.

But that's it; if Dave's going to have access to his life, then Kurt will have equally access to Dave's. And it's not just a matter of equality; Kurt really wants to know about Dave, since he's been wondering about different aspects of his client's life for a long time now.

Tonight it's Kurt's turn.

He doesn't think about that when he arrives at Dave's building, though; his plans quickly fade away when he hears Dave's voice through the security entry system, inviting him upstairs. Lord, he really missed Dave's voice, could he be any more pathetic? Probably not, but it doesn't stop Kurt from rushing to the elevator with a big smile on his face.

He needs to keep in mind that to Dave he's just a hooker and that that is in fact something good, since he can leave his horrid personal life behind for a handful of hours. Kurt can't let himself _be_ himself with Dave, because he'll start doing stupid things, like feeling warm in Dave's company, or content, or happy, and that will definitely lead him to something awful, and Kurt already has enough stuff to deal with.

His resolve doesn't hold very well, though, because he ends up embracing the joy and comfort provided by the warmth growing inside his chest. He doesn't do much to conceal his grin when Dave opens the door for him; Dave is smiling as well.

"Hey, you," Kurt greets Dave, letting himself in, closing the door behind him without breaking eye contact with Dave.

"Hi, doll," Dave replies, wrapping his arms around Kurt's slender back and pulling him into a soft kiss.

Kurt can feel Dave's smile on his lips when he kisses back and for some reason his chest expands, just slightly. He's stupidly happy but he can't help it; what's ridiculous is that he saw Dave just a week ago. Kurt can't let himself grow clingy.

"How are you feeling?" Dave asks tenderly when they break apart.

"Much better."

Dave narrows his eyes a bit. "Only 'better'? You're not totally over your cold now?"

There's a glimpse of worry in Dave's voice that instantly annoys Kurt, almost like a mood killer.

"My throat still hurts a little and I have to blow my nose from time to time, but that's it," Kurt blurts out, and he instantly curses to himself. He should have told Dave he's _really fine._ Dave's surely going to make a big deal out of this.

"You should have stayed in bed if you weren't feeling well," Dave tells him, and it sounds like a preach. Kurt rolls his eyes; Dave's reacting just like he predicted.

Kurt moves away, taking his jacket off and putting down his bag, because he really can't stand Dave when he goes all caring with him; Dave's pity - it's like a bad itch on his body that puts Kurt in the worst mood.

"Well, I can't afford staying in bed for so long," Kurt states, putting his hooker self right in front as a shield. "I have bills to pay."

And that's actually true, so it's not like he's making things up. Kurt shouldn't stay in bed for too long while he's sick because, indeed, he loses a lot of money. He's lying to Dave, though, and he knows it; he's certainly not here, with Dave again, for the purpose of getting Dave's 300 bucks in his pocket. Kurt's never _here_ for the money. While he thinks in numbers all the time, especially when he works, constantly making additions and subtractions to everything he does, Kurt doesn't focus on the money aspect of being with Dave, and he doesn't want to focus on it.

In fact, despite being a lot of money, the 300 dollars that he gets every Monday and Wednesday are not even in Kurt's weekly budget, not even for the Stove Fund, since he's never comfortable with _that_ money. He doesn't use any of it to live on, every penny goes towards paying medical debts.

Kurt's slightly upset though, so he won't think much about the real reasons he's here.

Luckily, Dave only sighs at his reply, not pushing the topic forwards, as he leads Kurt to the dining room. And this is where it begins; Kurt forces himself not to grow nervous.

"About that…" Kurt beings, when Dave leads him almost in front to the table, obviously inviting him to sit down and have dinner.

"Cheese ravioli. You don't like it?"

Kurt presses his lips into a tight smile. "I do, actually," and he notices the plate is heaped full of good smelling pasta with tomato sauce. "But I was thinking that I'd better not have dinner."

Dave's face falls right away and Kurt believes that this might work. "How come? Is this food wrong? We can order something else-"

"This is perfect, David," Kurt retorts calmly. "I really love pasta."

"Then have dinner with me," he says, sounding confused and a little disappointed and Kurt feels a little bad for making Dave go through this. But Dave upset him the last time so screw him.

Kurt sits down in his regular seat, not looking at his plate but at David. "You know, last week it really bothered me having to tell you all that stuff," he says, neither offended nor sad. He's just informing Dave.

Dave stares at Kurt, sitting down across from him, looking completely tense but not guilty in the slightest. "It wasn't the nicest thing to do but-"

"It wasn't, indeed," Kurt cuts him off casually. He's not mad about this anymore since he can't change what's past, and, because of that, Kurt might have a chance now to find out stuff about Dave. "And I think it's not fair that you get to know so much about me, while I know nothing about you. Just like you, I want to know stuff."

Dave narrows his eyes at him, holding a tight and uneasy smile. "I have nothing to tell you," he says, maybe a bit too defensively and it doesn't hurt any of Kurt's feelings.

"Too bad, because I have a lot of questions," Kurt tells him, crossing his arms over the table. "But I won't ask if you don't want me to." For some reason, this situation is making Kurt feel kind of giddy and chipper. He's playing with Dave, and he believes he'll achieve his task.

Dave's eyes are slowly showing a more serious glare. "I don't want you to," he states. "I don't get what this has to do with the food."

Kurt bites his lower lip. "Well, I figured that I can't really pay you to answer questions, as you so gallantly did with me," he says icily and Dave looks away, upset. At least he's showing some guilt. "But how about... one ravioli per question?"

Dave's eyes are suddenly fixed on him. "What?"

"One's not enough? Two ravioli, maybe?"

"Are you blackmailing me with food?"

Kurt plays it cool, almost playful and amused, even if he's dead serious. It seems important for Dave to feed him, so Kurt might as well try and see how far that gets him.

"I don't know. Is it working?"

Dave stays silent for several seconds. "This is ridiculous."

"If you say so… why don't we go to your bedroom? It's been over a week," he says, using his sexy voice, knowing this battle is not lost just yet.

"No, Kurt. Not yet, we have to have dinner first," Dave states, almost frustrated.

"I'm not going to have dinner," Kurt replies innocently. "Not unless you answer my questions, so if you don't want to do that then let's move to the bed."

Dave's jaw clenches, and he starts tapping his foot nervously. "So... what? You'll never have dinner with me again?"

Kurt shrugs again. "I don't mind. I was good with just having sex. I do like having dinner with you, but I can live without that. It's not like it's the first time I'll go to bed skipping a meal."

"Kurt, just eat this, please," Dave commands, growing exasperated and anxious.

"Nuh-uh, two ravioli per question."

"That's ridiculous, I told you!"

"Then we should go to your room and have sex! I told you that, too!"

Dave suddenly stands up, marching towards the rack where his coat is hanging and oh, no, Kurt's not going to let him do _that _again. "Don't you even _try_ to offer me money to _eat_ because after last week, I won't be taking any more money from you, _ever_ for any reason other than sex," Kurt states, his tone serious this time.

And it works because Dave stops and comes back to the table. "C'mon, Kurt. You've just recovered from a cold, you need to eat. In fact, you're not even fully recovered. Have you even fed yourself properly this past week?"

At some other moment, Kurt would be utterly offended, and deep down inside he is because who is Dave to question how well he takes care of himself? Yes, he's quite poor but Jesus Christ, he can buy food! But it occurs to Kurt now that Dave is showing him a new way to trick him, a trick Kurt hadn't thought about before.

"As much as I could. You know how broke I am, David," Kurt lies, sounding pitiful.

Kurt actually doesn't eat much when he's sick, but that's because he hardly has any appetite since all the food seems tasteless. And this past week Chantal brought him a lot of chicken soup so he didn't do badly at all.

Yet, while he hates being someone that Dave feels sorry for so much, Dave's pity for him could be the key to success and how ironic that none other than Dave pointed that out to him. So Kurt needs to exploit this; to play the sick, stray puppy abandoned in the rain that Dave thinks he is.

And it works, because Dave is looking at him with deep concern. "As much as you could? What's that supposed to mean? Did you eat at all?"

"Most days," he replies, sounding _faux_-small. "It's not a big deal, David."

"Most days?! Not a big deal?! You know that poor nutrition is no good for your health, especially when your health is already fucked up. You can't skip meals, Kurt, even less if you're sick!"

It's pretty hard for Kurt not to laugh at the irony. If Kurt wasn't trying to get information from David, he'll be once again offended by Dave's words. Dave's the last person who should use 'health' and 'nutrition' in the same sentence.

Right in that moment, Kurt's feels a sudden itch in his nose and he sneezes loudly. He can't believe the perfect timing, because he didn't even fake it and it adds a lot to his sick puppy act; Dave stares at him, worried and nervous.

"Just eat something, please. You're recovering from a cold, you need to keep your body's defenses strong."

Kurt takes a tissue from his pocket and blows his nose, shaking his head. "You know what my conditions are."

Dave fidgets in place, visibly anxious. It kills Kurt a little; Dave seems very much trapped, uncomfortable and nervous and maybe Dave thinks Kurt's going to question his eating habits since Kurt has caught him on that. It's very likely Dave doesn't want to spill about that. Kurt's not stupid, so he won't ask straightforwardly; obviously that's a sensitive issue and has to be approached with care.

"Fine."

Kurt beams, holding the fork right away. "Good. What's your job?"

Dave blinks, as if taken aback by that question. "My job?" Kurt nods. Obviously Dave was expecting a much worse question, because the nervous look he had in his eyes fades slowly.

"Yes, your job. What do you do for living? You know what I do for living, so it's only fair."

Dave actually smiles, relaxing. "I'm a financial manager. I work for American Express."

Wow. That sounds… well, so _not_ Dave Karofsky. Dave's clearly doing well, but Kurt never expected that the former jock and Neanderthal was going to become something related to finances. Maybe something related to sports? Yet, Dave probably didn't expect him to turn into a stripper and lap dancer - and a prostitute (but that's not reality).

Kurt pierces two raviolis and pops them in his mouth, sticking to his part of the deal. The food is really good, as usual, and Dave sighs, sounding almost relieved.

"Do you like it?" Kurt inquires.

"My job? Not really. I don't hate it but it's certainly not my passion. It's quite boring, actually."

"Then why do you do it? Did you study in college to become a financial manager?"

"I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I didn't want to waste time studying something useless. I'm good with numbers, so I studied something where I could get the job that paid best, make some money, and if I figure out what I want to do, I'll be able to afford it."

Kurt says nothing, processing Dave's words and Dave points at the plate. "What?"

"I just answered your questions, it's your turn to eat."

"I didn't ask any questions."

"You asked me if I liked my job _and_ why did I do it."

Sneaky bastard… "That was just conversation," Kurt states. Those were not questions he planned.

"Two questions, two answers, four raviolis. Your rules, you know?"

Kurt glares at Dave, but he still eats. It's not like it's a big sacrifice.

"It's not a bad plan, I guess," Kurt comments, taking care not to phrase any questions unintentionally.

"I guess not. I still don't know what I really want to do, but if I ever, I don't know, want to turn into an artist, I won't have to worry that I'm going to get evicted because I didn't sell enough paintings."

Kurt is impressed. "You like to paint?" He didn't expect that from Dave. It's actually nice to know that he has an artistic si-

"No, it was just an example. I'm definitely not an artistic guy," Dave replies, pointing at the plate again.

Damn, he's being quite sloppy. The plate is full, so Kurt knows he can ask several more questions, but he must be careful not to run out of food because he asked dumb questions, missing the important ones.

"Are you out?" Kurt inquires after swallowing down his food. That's a good question and Kurt's eager to know.

"As in _gay_ out?"

"Well, yeah."

"I am," Dave replies, not sounding bothered in the slightest. "I came out in college; it wasn't as much of a big deal as I thought it was going to be, but I guess that when you're in college it's not such a big deal as when you're in high school. People care less."

Kurt's been wondering a lot about that because maybe if Dave were still in the closet, it could be something that affects his self esteem and even depresses him. But if Dave's out and totally cool with it… Kurt chews his food slowly, and decides to stay on the topic.

"So everybody knows? Your parents and… I don't know, at work?"

Dave nods. "I'm not particularly loud about it, but I don't hide it. At work they know, yes. Most of them are older and married, and since I was single they wanted to introduce me to girls so I told them I was gay. They were surprised but no one gave me a hard time. As for my parents… They weren't thrilled when I told them, but they didn't take it badly, either; it took them time to get used to it, I guess, but now my mother asks me if I've got a boyfriend already…"

Kurt laughs. "Do you?"

"What?"

"Have a boyfriend."

Dave snorts. "You think you'd be here if I was with someone? I'm not a cheater."

Kurt keeps on eating as the answers pile up, and for some reason he thinks it's nice to know that Dave's not a cheater. Most people cheat, sadly, or at least that's been Kurt's experience. Back in high school, most people in the Glee club had cheated on their boyfriends or girlfriends in some way. Then all of his boyfriends had cheated on him. It's good to know that Dave is not one, but then he hurries to remind himself that Dave not being a cheater is irrelevant since Kurt's not going to date him.

"I wouldn't know," Kurt replies, trying to sound indifferent. "Have you had boyfriends?"

"Twice."

"What happened?"

Dave shrugs, looking slightly uncomfortable. "I don't know. Grew apart, I guess; most couples break up at some point. Usually, the boyfriend you get in your twenties is not the one that's going to last forever. People change, grow up, and your goals and aspirations are not the same when you're twenty as when you're twenty-five or thirty."

Kurt can't say much since Dave has a point. Couples do break up and there's nothing unusual about it.

Yet, his mind races as he tries to reconcile what he's found out about Dave's troubles with what Dave is saying now and it's hard.

Dave makes a great living; it's obvious he did well at college; he has a good job in an important company; he's out, so that can't be something that affects his self-esteem; and he's even been in relationships with men, which reaffirms that Dave's clearly comfortable with being gay.

Of course, Dave grew up and he's not seventeen anymore. Accepting his sexuality might have troubled Dave in the past, but it doesn't seem to be troubling now. His co-workers know, his family knows… and that means there's a bunch of pill bottles in Dave's bathroom and Kurt still doesn't know what they are for. What is making Dave hurt so much? His bulimia? God, this is very hard.

"Are you sad?" Kurt inquires, trying not to sound nervous.

Dave frowns as if he didn't get the question. "Sad?"

Kurt nods. "I found your pills in your bathroom."

Dave swallows hard; his face is difficult to read. He fidgets in place as if he's debating between yelling at Kurt and digging a hole in the floor and crawling into it.

"I didn't mean to," Kurt hurries to explain, because he doesn't want Dave to think he was nosing through his stuff. "That night when you told me to take a bath… I never get to do that; I can hardly shower comfortably at my place since water turns cold within ten minutes, and that bath… I wanted to make the most of it. I wondered if you had, I don't know, salts or scents. I didn't find any, but I saw your pills."

He adds that little bit of truth about how he can't even shower comfortably not just to add more to his 'I'm a poor guy' act, but because it really seems that his misery unsettles Dave, and he hopes it makes him forget the fact that Kurt sort of poked around his stuff. And it works, since the glimpse of anger on Dave's face fades and pity replaces it.

But Dave opens his mouth and closes it again, like he still doesn't know what to say.

"I don't feel sad."

"There are four bottles of pills in your cabinet. I know for a fact that one is for anxiety and the other for depression. I don't know what are the other two for-"

"It's not like that," Dave cuts him off. "You can't label yourself according to the pills you take. Clonazepam is for anxiety, but it's also prescribed for children with epilepsy because it reduces seizures. One of the other two you don't know, it's usually for people with bipolar disorders and I'm not bipolar."

Clearly Dave is very familiar with psychiatric medications and that's not comforting in the slightest.

"What's the other one for?"

Dave looks away. "Several things," he mumbles.

"And why does your doctor prescribed it to you?"

"I'm not sad," Dave states, as if he's figuring out his words as they come out of his mouth. "I was diagnosed with clinical depression a few years ago, and I've been on medication and therapy ever since. I never took so many pills as I do now, though."

Dave is not telling him what the other pills are for, but Kurt can deal with that because Dave is telling him stuff that Kurt's concerned about. Very concerned about.

"Why? What's wrong now?"

"Nothing. My shrink in Boston just gave me two pills. When I got the job at American Express seven months ago I had to move here and change doctors. This new one… I hate it. She insists they'll make me feel better, but I feel just the same and I hate having to take so many pills."

Dave used to live in Boston. Kurt makes a mental note about that in order to ask later, but right now he doesn't want to change the subject.

"But you're sad. I mean, you're depressed. Isn't it the same?"

Dave sighs, almost resigned. "When you're 'sad', you're sad for a while; it comes and goes. I don't feel 'sad'. I don't cry myself to sleep or want to kill myself and I function pretty well: I have a job I'm good at, pay my bills, call my parents quite often…" Kurt stares at him quietly and then Dave shrugs. "Clinical depression, it's more like a constant state; you don't even think about it, it's just there. Sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse, but it's always there shadowing you and sucking your energy. And you're just…. Okay with that," he finishes, shrugging like he doesn't care.

"Apathetic?" Kurt tries.

"You could say so."

It's then that Kurt realizes that, in a way, he's in a much better position than Dave, and it's almost shocking.

Kurt's broke, Dave's quite well off but they're both ill. Yet, Kurt is not constantly at the mercy of his asthma, and if he can't breathe, he uses his inhaler. Dave instead lives with depression every single second of every single day. There are no pills that will magically fix it, and the ones he takes already apparently don't do much. Kurt can actually see Dave looking indifferent while he talks about his depression, like it doesn't bother him or like he can't find the strength to be bothered about being depressed and that's just fine.

A part of Kurt is eager to find out what's making Dave feel so bad and fix it. The other part reminds him that it's not his business. He also realizes that he's way out of his depth here, because Kurt's very familiar with being sad but he's never been clinically depressed, even when his life totally fell apart after the coma.

Kurt eats his food, trying to figure out fast how to lead this conversation, because this is serious stuff. He's stepping into sensitive topics and he certainly doesn't want to upset Dave. Dave's vulnerable side is showing a lot, even if the man is still trying to look tough.

"What's under your shirt?" Kurt blurts out with very little tact, unable to stop himself.

Dave moves nervously in his seat and Kurt curses himself because so much for trying to be sensitive. "What?"

It's something that clearly affects Dave's self esteem and Kurt's poking right there.

Kurt wants to know though. "I've just… I don't know," he tries to play casual now, to decrease the seriousness of the question. "I just enjoy sex with you, and I'd like it even better if you were fully naked."

"Believe me, it's better this way."

"Why? What's wrong? Do you have, I don't know, some big scars or something?"

Dave stares at him, frowning and like Kurt's saying the most stupid thing in the world. "Are you serious?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because it's obvious," Dave grits between his teeth, suddenly looking mad.

"Well, I'm sorry, it's not to me."

"Oh, please, as if you don't see it."

Kurt doesn't get what is supposed to be so obvious or why Dave is getting mad. "See what? I don't see anything because you're always covered."

"That I'm fat, okay!?" Dave exclaims, almost exasperated, and Kurt jumps in his place. This can't be… "Just because I wear tee shirts, it doesn't make me look any skinnier but at least this way I can do us both the favor of not exposing my disgusting whale body."

There's so much venom in Dave's voice that Kurt's feels his heart break into a million pieces. That venom is obviously not directed at Kurt but at Dave himself, and it's devastating to listen Dave talking like that about himself.

_That's_ what the tees were for? The idea never crossed Kurt's mind, because it's ridiculous. Even as Kurt struggles to understand it, he can't, because he stares at Dave, who looks mad with his jaw clenched, and just sees a very attractive guy being mad.

"I don't know if it helps, but I don't think you're fat," Kurt says quietly, and Dave stares at him with an icy grin, obviously not believing a word.

"Funny you're the one saying that," Dave mumbles, but Kurt still hears him.

"What did you just say?"

"Nothing," Dave says and Kurt frowns.

"And by covering yourself with a shirt, you're not doing me any favors, particularly in bed-"

"I don't want you to see all my fat, okay?! Just like _I_ don't want to see it, either. Just because you've probably fucked uglier and fatter guys, it doesn't make me any thinner or better looking. I don't like to see myself, okay? I like it even less if others have to see me, even if you couldn't care less about how ugly your client is, so I'd rather keep my shirt on, thank you."

Kurt is stunned speechless.

First because of that part about having fucked loads of uglier and fatter guys. Sometimes Kurt forgets that Dave thinks he's a prostitute.

Second because he can't believe Dave thinks all that about himself. And the words he chooses make Kurt want to cry. Dave shouldn't hate himself like this; he's completely wrong about his looks. Kurt is more than attracted to Dave and he'd love to see him fully naked.

What's even worse is that if Dave refers himself as fat and ugly _out loud_, Kurt can only guess at all the other self-destructive things Dave thinks to himself. The depression thing starts making a lot more sense.

"I don't think you're fat," Kurt repeats firmly. "Or ugly."

Dave snorts, standing up. "So you think I'm thin?"

The deal is over; neither of them is paying attention to the food, and Dave starts pacing around his living room like he's trapped inside a cage. Kurt follows Dave with his eyes, anguishing.

"Do you?"

Kurt blinks. "What?"

"You don't think I'm fat, so I must be thin, right? Slender?"

How can he answer that? Dave's not t_hin,_ in truth he does have some extra pounds and his stomach is visibly round. But just having a few extra pounds instead of a solid six pack under his shirt doesn't make Dave fat, let alone unattractive. But Dave's bulimic, so Kurt doesn't think Dave will believe him if he says that.

Kurt stares at Dave, who's standing with spread arms like he's showing himself to Kurt, and Kurt trembles because he can't help thinking how gorgeous Dave is. It's not the first time Kurt considers him attractive, but now as Dave points to his supposed flaws, Kurt's forced to stare at him even more, and all he can think is how handsome and hot Dave actually is.

Kurt doesn't know what to do, because that's what he sees and it seems impossible for him to make Dave see that. Kurt's throat narrows at his own desperation; he wants to laugh at the ridiculousness of this matter; in his head, every time that Dave says 'fat' or 'ugly,' or something like that, Kurt thinks 'what the hell is he talking about?' and he also wants to cry at the same time because he can't understand how Dave can't understand how gorgeous he is.

"You... you're just," Kurt doesn't know what to say. Anything he says will upset Dave. "Solid."

"Ha! Just a fancy word for 'fat.'"

"You're not fat!" Kurt states, standing up as well and following Dave to the living room. "Even less ugly!"

"You had boyfriends before all this, right? That guy in McKinley, and you mentioned another when you were sick."

Kurt frowns, not getting why Dave is suddenly asking this. "Yes."

"Have any of your ex-boyfriends weighed anywhere near 200 pounds? Hell, have you ever even i_date_/i anyone around that weight?"

Kurt goes silent, because no, he never dated anyone with Dave's physique. But that's not for the reason Dave is suggesting. All Kurt's exes where 'his type,' but he never felt like ripping Blaine, Christian or Francis' clothes off like he does with Dave almost all the time. At first Kurt just thought it was because he knows and enjoys what comes after ripping each other clothes; sex has never been so good. But when he's with Dave, Kurt gets easily turned on and it can't be just the knowledge of what comes next because you must feel attracted first to be fully relaxed and comfortable to move forwards.

He can't reveal that to Dave though and Kurt doubts he would be able to explain that to him anyway.

Dave laughs at the lack of answer from Kurt. He keeps pacing around, running his hands over his neck and face like he's suddenly too hot and then he collapses on the couch, holding his face with his hands, breathing hard. Kurt rushes next to him, not knowing what to do; he really distressed Dave; he's hurting and Kurt wants to kill himself because he caused this and has no idea how to fix it.

"Dave, c'mon," Kurt shakes him anxiously, trying to get his attention. "Don't think that-"

"You should go," Dave cuts him off.

"What?"

"Just go. You should rest, and I don't-"

"I'm not going to go," Kurt states firmly. He wants to stay here, with Dave; he can't walk away, leaving Dave upset like this. He'd never do that.

"Kurt, please," Dave says, his voice breaking. "I just can't do this right now. You can't afford not to work, I know, I'll pay you anyway but please, just leave."

Kurt's trembling and doing his best not to cry. A billion thoughts run through his head as he tries to figure out what to do.

"I don't want to go. It's cold outside and dark," Kurt pulls his poor guy card once more. "I live in a sketchy neighborhood, it's dangerous to be out when it's dark."

Dave says nothing for several seconds, his face still buried in his hands, until he suddenly stands up, startling Kurt.

"Then I'll go. You stay here for the night, I'll go somewhere else," Dave says, suddenly getting up and marching towards the coat rack. "Turn the heat up so you can be warm and-"

"What are you talking about? You can't leave!"

"I'll go to some motel somewhere," Dave says, avoiding Kurt's glance.

"You've got to stop this! I don't want you to go, I want you to stay here with me!" Kurt runs up behind Dave, holding him by his hand but Dave spins and pulls away, making Kurt flinch.

"Don't touch me!"

Kurt's just two blinks away from crying.

"God! How can you even touch me?" Dave almost sobs, turning around so as not to face Kurt, resting his forehead against the door. The question sounded like it was directed to himself rather than to Kurt but Kurt keeps thinking fast, frenetically analyzing every single word that Dave's speaking, not wanting to screw this up more than it's been screwed up already.

"You don't want me to touch you?" he asks, doing his best to speak without his voice cracking.

Deep down he's panicking. Did he ruin everything between them? Dave does not want him around anymore? It would make sense, since Kurt started all this mess and Dave wouldn't want someone who hurt him around. Yet Kurt does not want to give up on this, realizing that the last thing he wants is to stop seeing Dave.

"It makes me so sick," Dave breathes out, and Kurt feels like he's been slapped in the face. He was right before - Dave is repulsed by him because he's a hooker and a loser. This whole arrangement was just Dave's form of charity and Kurt is devastated. Dave must have felt this way since day one-

"I'm just so fucking disgusting," Dave's pained voice interrupts Kurt's train of thought.

Kurt blinks, perplexed, as he realizes that Dave is talking about himself, that Dave thinks _he's_ too loathsome to be touched. Once again, Kurt feels like he's been slapped in the face but harder this time.

Never in a million years Kurt was expecting this from Dave Karofsky; not back in high school, not now. Even less now. It's heartbreaking that someone could feel this way about themselves, display this level of self-loathing. Kurt knew Dave had issues, but with him being young, handsome and successful, that _this_ would be Dave deep down is the last thing Kurt expected.

Right now, Dave's self esteem is in pieces, and it was probably this way before Kurt started this game of questions and answers. Still, Kurt triggered this and he struggles to find some way to shut off this devastating track of self-hate that seems to be on repeat inside Dave's head.

"You're not disgusting," Kurt tells him quietly, placing his hands carefully on Dave's shoulders. "And I love touching you."

Dave tenses under his caress. Kurt can still hear him breathing heavily, like he's about to hyperventilate. "You don't have to make me feel better. I know what I am."

Kurt lets out a little laugh, trying to ease the tension. "I'm not trying to make you feel better. I'm telling the truth. Disgusted? Me? Don't you see me every night we spend together moaning and squirming underneath you?"

Dave snorts. "That's just sex."

Suddenly Kurt sees a way out. Maybe. Dave doesn't have to believe what Kurt says. Words aren't working, but Kurt can show him through sex that he means every word. It's also something that Kurt could use to pick up Dave's shattered self-esteem, at least a little.

"There's not such a thing as 'just sex,' David," Kurt states, running his hands down Dave's arms.

"Funny coming from you."

Bingo.

"Exactly," Kurt says, pressing himself against Dave's back. "You think I ever enjoyed sex before, David? I hated it; it always made me feels so uncomfortable… but with you…"

"Kurt," Dave speaks, with a warning tone.

They're far from being in the mood, but if sex can distract Dave from this angst attack, Kurt will go for it, so he presses himself against Dave even more, almost rubbing himself against the other man.

"You're the only one that makes me love sex," Kurt whispers seductively. "You can see it, every night you have me. I can't fake coming, and lord, you make me come over and over."

It's not hard for Kurt to say this; there's no lie in his words, even if the reason he never liked sex much was that his three exes never made Kurt feel the way he feels with Dave when they're in bed, and not because he gets fucked uncountable times per night by random strangers in the booths of The VIP for seventy bucks, as Dave must be thinking right now.

Kurt places a hot, wet kiss on the back of Dave's neck. "Makes me feel kind of bad."

Dave tenses again, and Kurt smirks; this is going to end well.

"What? Why?"

Kurt rests his forehead in Dave's shoulder, smiling. "I feel I should be paying you. Like I owe you," he says, almost amused and a little embarrassed. "I'm the hooker, supposed to please you, but you're the one driving _me_ insane with pleasure every night."

Dave finally turns around. He looks pale, and distressed but there's also a frown in his face.

"Don't say that. You don't owe me anything," Dave states, placing his hands on Kurt's hips. "It's not like you don't please me; I feel the same way about you."

Kurt throws his arms around Dave's neck, feeling Dave's body easing. Kurt relaxes, since the moment of angst seems to be fading as this small sex talk goes on, and Kurt lets himself fall into a lust trance.

"It's not just sex for me anymore, David. It's finally something enjoyable, something great, because you're so good at it," Kurt says, almost purring, reducing the space between them and rubbing his lips against Dave's just slightly. "You're so good with me. Don't you ever think otherwise."

At that moment, Dave crushes his lips against Kurt's in a desperate kiss and Kurt just goes with it.

* * *

><p>Around an hour later, Kurt's laying naked in Dave's bed, covered just with a sheet, listening to the water running in the bathroom. Dave's taking a shower and Kurt still can't move, feeling exhausted, giddy and slightly disoriented.<p>

It's no surprise that Dave fucks him so well, but it's like after their talk Dave was ten times more determined than usual to leave him completely wrecked. There's a soft smile on Kurt's face because he's so well laid he can't even believe it, and he's also stunned because God, the last hour had been really incredible.

Kurt can still feel the ghost of Dave's kisses all over his neck and Dave's hands caressing his body. Dave first got Kurt off by practically sucking his brains out though his cock, and he was hardly even finished coming when Dave got him hard again and fucked the hell out of him. Just thinking about it, Kurt would be getting aroused right now if his cock weren't so spent.

He knows he has to get up, though, because his lungs are itchy and he can feel an asthma attack forming very _very_ slowly, so he needs his inhaler.

Kurt takes a deep breath and forces himself to stand. He's sore all over but he can't really complain; he walks around the room, trying to find where his underwear is since they got undressed on their way to the bedroom. The air is cool but not cold, at some point Dave turned the heat on, but being all nude still makes Kurt uncomfortable; he finds in the armchair the same cardigan he borrowed from Dave during his last visit and puts it on.

In the living room he gets his inhaler out of his jacket pocket and takes two puffs.

Then he returns to the bedroom as his breathing starts getting better, picking up clothes from the floor on his way and draping them over the back of Dave's armchair. Then he climbs back in bed.

While he's incredibly content because God, he's so well fucked he feels like laughing, Kurt stares at the bathroom door and worries a little.

Dave always takes uncountable showers and Kurt wonders if Dave also has some obsessive compulsive disorder. Seriously, Dave showers every time after they fuck and okay, you get sweaty and sticky, but if they always fuck more than once a night, is it really necessary to shower every time? Maybe Dave's doing what's usually done; Kurt never had sex with his exes more than once in the same night and he generally took showers afterward, but showering three or four times per night seems ridiculous.

It's not important, though; the thing is that sex is now over. It did distract Dave and when they were done, Dave seemed to be back to his old self. Yet, now he's all alone in the bathroom and Kurt worries what Dave could be thinking about because from the little that he could see, Dave's mind is not a pretty place at all.

The post-coital bliss starts fading and all the previous events start sinking in. Kurt feels the urge to sneak into the bathroom to make sure Dave is alright. He's about to get up and do it when he hears the water go off. Kurt tenses in place, not being sure what's he's about to face. He's clueless about where they go from here; just an hour ago Dave was a mess, and the sex has been great for both of them but what happens now?

Kurt forces himself to stay put, almost bracing for the worst. He's suddenly too nervous, anxious at the prospect of what Dave might do next. Dave surely spent some of this time on his own going through their argument and all the things they said to each other, and Kurt fears the conclusions Dave might have reached.

He stares at the bathroom door intently, waiting for the moment that Dave will come out, and when he does, Kurt holds his breath.

But nothing happens and Kurt doesn't know if that's even worse than if they were yelling at each other again.

Dave looks the same as he does after every shower: wet hair, black tee and boxers. The expression on his face doesn't say anything in particular and Kurt lets him be, waiting to see where things go.

Dave stands at the end of the bed, watching Kurt with a soft smile and it relaxes him.

"Is that my cardigan?"

Kurt looks down at himself, blushing a little. "Sorry. Had to get up to get my inhaler, and I couldn't find my clothes anywhere. I'm not fond of walking around nude. I didn't mean to-"

"Hey, looks better on you than on me," Dave tells him, sitting on the bed and running his hand over Kurt's leg. Kurt smiles back, liking this contact that was not sexual, just tender. "Are you okay? I mean, your inhaler-"

"I'm fine, David. I need it almost every day just to clear my lungs. No biggie."

Dave nods at Kurt's words and Kurt keeps on staring at him. Dave seems to be completely alright, which is completely ridiculous since the man was in pieces just an hour ago. Sex can't just make Dave forget about everything. Kurt's not sure if Dave is in denial or pretending nothing wrong happened, but Dave looks calm now and Kurt decides not to push the subject, since it's clear that no matter how much Kurt wants to fix the situation, he doesn't know how to deal with such an upset Dave.

"You're smiling," Dave points out.

Kurt hasn't realized that; at least the post-sex glow conceals his worry. "Well laid people are happy people."

Dave laughs quietly and Kurt's heart constricts. If only he could make Dave happy… Wait, what? That's not Kurt's problem.

Even if he's not showing it now, Dave is hurting inside and before he can stop himself, Kurt kneels on the bed, hugging Dave from behind, which only makes Dave laugh again. "Seriously, that much?"

"Oh, please. Like you didn't notice," Kurt replies playfully, because if Dave wants to assume this affection is because of the sex, so be it.

"It's still pretty early," Dave says, his gaze fixed on the clock and he's right, it's not even 11:00 PM.

They skipped dinner and the foreplay was nothing but an angst argument. "Want to watch something?" Kurt suggests.

"Sure. Oh, guess what? I got this awesome coffee machine. You'll love it."

Kurt smiles. "Yeah?"

"Come with me, I want to show it to you," Dave says, standing up and extending his hand. Kurt takes hold, getting up as well and they walk towards the kitchen.

The place settings of the failed dinner are still there on the coffee and dining tables. Kurt can feel Dave tensing a little when they pass the dining room, but neither of them says anything. Dave seems to be just fine once they get to the kitchen, and he happily shows Kurt a very fancy coffee machine that Kurt quickly recognizes.

"The George Clooney one?!"

The Prada office had a Nespresso back when Kurt was doing his internship and he was highly addicted to its coffee. God, that time seems like a whole other life.

"You like it?" Dave asks, and the hopeful look on his face makes Kurt suspicious, but he's so happy that he lets it pass.

"Like it? I love it! I swear I had like five or six coffees a day when I worked for Prada. They had one of these, too, though this one looks much newer."

Dave's smiling widely now; it's impossible for Kurt not to notice, since Dave doesn't smile like this almost ever. "It's the last very latest model, or so they said. You want one, or do you want to wait until tomorrow?"

"I'd love to have one now!"

"I didn't know what flavor you like, so I got the Nespresso cube," Dave says, opening the counter just to reveal the huge box, containing all the coffee flavors.

Kurt's mouth waters, but at the same time he's still processing Dave's words. Dave bought the whole freaking cube just to make sure Kurt's preferred coffee flavor was on hand? Dave got this for him… it's a damn expensive machine. Dave can surely afford it, but it still makes Kurt a little uncomfortable. Dave's continuing to pamper him; during his last visit Dave got him a Starbucks coffee for breakfast… _Breakfast_, hmmm... is this because Kurt stayed until late morning last time?

He doesn't ask because he doesn't want to argue with Dave. Kurt hates all the spoiling and pampering that he gets from Dave because he really dislikes being pitied, but at the same time, Kurt did exploit his sick puppy act earlier so it wouldn't be right for him to get mad at Dave for falling for it.

Yet, Kurt only did that sick puppy routine tonight. Dave has been pampering him for weeks.

But Dave looks so excited and pleased with the fact that he loves the Nespresso surprise, and honestly, if pampering him makes Dave happy, or at least helps him forget about his misery, Kurt might as well put aside his annoyance and let Dave do it. In spite of having everything Kurt could dream off – health, a warm house, a normal job and no debts - Dave is far from being a happy person. Hell, Dave's even clinically depressed. But he's smiling now and Kurt assumes Dave doesn't smile too often, so he says nothing about the pampering. It won't be a sacrifice for Kurt to drink his favorite coffee and give Dave a break from angst for the rest of the night.

Dave takes the box with coffee capsules from the counter and hands it to Kurt, who quickly pulls the Arpeggio out, holding it to his chest.

"My beloved Arpeggio! I thought we'd never meet again," Kurt beams.

He's so happy he could cry. This is a very expensive luxury that was way beyond Kurt's reach, and it's so sad… it's not like he's getting designer clothes again. It's just coffee. But Kurt's not going to think about all the things he no longer has and probably won't have for quite a few more years.

Dave keeps smiling and makes coffee for the both of them. The smell is delicious, and Kurt just wishes he could drink it already, instead of having to wait for it to cool a bit. They return to the bedroom, turning the TV on, and Kurt starts drinking his coffee while Dave picks something to watch.

"Good?"

"Good? I think I'm gonna come again."

He's really in heaven.

Dave puts some random movie on and they both sit in bed, resting their backs against the headboard. Kurt snuggles close to Dave, who wraps an arm around Kurt while with the other holds his coffee.

This is so comfortable and nice. Kurt pays little attention to the movie; he's feeling very content and that's not a usual feeling for him, or at least it hasn't been for a very long time. If Kurt could just reduce the entire universe to this very moment, him naked under Dave's clothes, being hugged by Dave as they both drink some nice coffee in bed while watching TV after having sex… they'd look like a couple. In the universe's eyes, even if it doesn't have eyes, they do look and act like a couple.

It's unsettling.

Kurt rests his head on Dave's shoulder and looks up at him. Just then, Dave looks down and their gazes meet. Dave gives him a small, tender smile that Kurt returns, and then Dave's attention is back to the movie while Kurt's heart clenches.

He shouldn't like this; he can't enjoy this. They're both a mess, a colossal mess, and this is the very proof of that. Earlier they were yelling at each other, Dave was falling apart and now he's all okay. They look like a couple right now, but they are far from being one. Couples don't learn about each other by tricking or blackmailing their partners, and certainly they don't pay each other for sex.

It's easier for Kurt when they argue and even when they yell to each other. Kurt's so used to getting beaten down by life, he can handle that. But the good moments make Kurt stumble, almost shocked at the realization of how it feels to be content or happy from time to time, feelings that were almost forgotten.

Yet he can't help embracing those moments and it's terrifying, because he doesn't know if he'll be able to let them go. And he'll have to let them go, because at the end of the day he's the prostitute Dave pays to have sex with, and Kurt can't really change that now.


	12. Chapter 11

****Title:**** About trees and empty forests.**  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> **Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.**  
><strong>Rating:<strong> **R.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> **Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.**  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> **Season One and Two.**  
><strong>Beta:<strong> **Ella Greggs.**  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> **97oo this chapter.**  
><strong>Genre:<strong> **Romance/Angst/Drama.**  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> **Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.**  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves. But then one night they meet again, in an unexpected way and in an unexpected place and everything changes.**  
><strong>AN:** **I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.**  
><strong>**A/N: **I really really sorry for taking so long to update. Life has been crazy these past few months, crazy as in… I moved to another country, in another continent crossing the ocean. No fic is abandoned, there's still plenty to come; I'm working on the following chapters and some of them are almost done, so I promise that next updates won't take so ridiculously long. Once again, my apologizes and I hope you enjoy this chapter.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 11<strong>

Dave listens to his shrink talk, but pays very little attention. It's not like he dislikes Dr. Williams, but he has experience with therapists and they always say that if you're not comfortable with your doctors, or if you don't have much trust in them, then the treatment will never succeed.

He's very aware that eating like a damn pig and then forcing himself to throw up is a fucked up thing to do, but he's not just _that_ and Dr. Williams only focuses in that aspect of him, which is the last thing Dave wants to hear or talk about.

But Dave nods at everything she says, feeling heavy and tired. Ever since last Wednesday when he broke down in front of Kurt, he's been finding it hard to gather enough strength to even get up from bed. But he acts normal, as much as he can, because the last thing he wants is people asking him if he's alright.

Dave talks to her about what he did over the past two weeks, almost bored. He never mentions Kurt, and never has since Kurt stormed back into his life. Dave says nothing new or interesting, since his life is not interesting. For some reason, Dr. Williams decides to increase the dose of some of his pills; it depresses Dave a lot but he says nothing.

He will still follow the medication regime; he knows he can't suddenly just quit taking the pills. Dave made that mistake once with his first shrink. After several months of taking pills, he just stopped one day without telling his doctor, and his body started suffering the consequences of the abrupt absence of drugs. Since he was feeling as emotionally shitty as always, he never realized that his body did in fact function differently on the drugs. Three days of shaking, muscle cramps and an indescribable ache made him admit that he hadn't been taking his meds, and his then-shrink was way pissed.

Now he's taking almost three times more the medication than he took back then, and has been for the last six months, but it doesn't seem to make any difference…

After handing him the prescriptions, she gives him an encouraging smile that Dave finds hard to return, and they agree to see each other again next week.

Defeated, Dave leaves the doctor's office to return to work, since it's just two in the afternoon. He practically sulks towards his car, and when he gets in he stays still behind the wheel, not even turning the engine on.

Dave wonders if he should call his old shrink back in Boston; it might help. Still, Dave knows what his problem is: Kurt. His problem is not knowing how to deal with the whole Kurt thing, but he doesn't want to discuss that with Dr. Williams. So even though he pays the woman to listen to his troubles once a week, in reality he has _no one_ to talk to about what's really bothering him.

_Okay, Kurt's not the entire problem,_ Dave thinks to himself, since he was beyond fucked up way before he met Kurt again, but none of his longstanding issues caused him to feel what he's feeling now.

He still can't get over what went down on Wednesday.

Dave's so… _empty_. Kurt took everything away from him, leaving him with nothing inside. At the same time, Dave feels heavy; it seems to take so much effort to move around.

It's his own fault; everything is his fault because he knew that things were not going to continue just casually after he made Kurt tell him about his life. Dave didn't expect Kurt to made him talk about _his_ life, though; he didn't expect that Kurt would even care, and Kurt surely doesn't. Probably Kurt just wanted to get even.

And he's so fucking weak; he couldn't even get his shit together in front of Kurt. No, Dave had to break down, right in front of _him;_ the last person Dave wants to see him at his worst.

He's a fucking idiot, there's no question about that, but it doesn't really help that life's a bitch.

Part of him wants to laugh at the incredibility of the whole thing. Dave spent years hiding himself from everyone, and he has done it so well. No one knows about his binges, or his throwing up; almost no one ever found out that he can't stand eating in public, or that he will never, under any circumstance, get fully naked, even when he's alone.

It's complicated for Dave to deal with himself; he hates himself, pure and simple. Which is completely understandable, since he can't find a single aspect of himself that's worthy. But he still pretends that things are okay and that he's a somewhat normal person. And he's been doing that for so long that he's very, very good at keeping his worst faults hidden. Sometimes it's hard even for him to see his real self.

But Kurt saw it all. _Kurt._ Fucking Kurt, the beginning and the end of all things.

Honestly, Dave could have just stuck his fingers inside his throat and vomited right in front of Kurt at that point, for all it would have matter. And then Dave remembers that, ha! He basically did that already, since maybe Kurt didn't see him vomiting up his meal, but Kurt certainly has heard it.

How could he, how could he let Kurt strip him bare? Dave can't stand it. He can't stand the embarrassment, the utter mortification, and for the love of God he could stand it easier to be exposed like this to anyone else but Kurt.

Dave fidgets in the seat of his car as he gets worked up by his thoughts. He can't help it, though, because every time he remembers that Kurt knows_ everything _he feels so sick, like he's about to throw up, without doing anything to provoke it.

He starts playing with the idea of not calling Kurt again, and he quickly grows fond of that idea. That night, once the distraction provided by sex was over, walking out of that bathroom to face Kurt was probably the hardest thing Dave has ever done in his life. It took a lot of effort to compose himself after crumbling in front of Kurt, and thankfully, Kurt humored him by pretending nothing had happened.

But it did happen, and it's too embarrassing for Dave to face Kurt again. It's too humiliating to even exist in front of his former love. Dave chastises himself for giving Kurt such importance. Kurt's just a prostitute and Dave should not care what a prostitute thinks about him.

But Dave does care. He can't help it. Prostitute or not, God, it's still _Kurt_,

_I guess I did want him to like me, _Dave admits to himself, feeling his stomach twist.

Dave wants to cry, since he ruined any chance he might have had to, maybe, get Kurt to like him at least a little. If Kurt didn't want him before Dave fucked up and fell apart, Kurt surely wants him even less now.

Dave lost the thing he wants most before even trying to get it; before even realizing he was trying to get it.

He mustn't think like that. Kurt's only with him for the money. There's nothing unique about Dave in Kurt's life other than that he pays more for his services and that he fucks Kurt in his apartment instead of at the club. The strip show Dave saw Kurt perform, it happens every night. Men touch Kurt every night, and just like Dave fucked him in that dirty booth, loads of other men do, too.

But it's not that straightforward when they're together. Sometimes being with him feels so freaking good and natural that even when Kurt tells him he's a hooker – and Kurt tends to be the one to point that out - it just doesn't register in Dave's ears. Maybe the problem is that Kurt's a very good actor, Dave considers, tiling his head to one side. They fight quite often, but then there is great sex, and sweet words, and cuddling and freaking routines and Dave falls for it more often than not. Kurt provides great service, turning into everything that Dave wants.

Dave feels his stomach growing empty and not because of hunger. He finally turns the engine on, resolving not to call Kurt again. He can't deal with having Kurt stare at him, knowing what he knows.

Dave's decision doesn't make him feel any better, but nothing makes him feel better nowadays. The idea of not seeing Kurt ever again pains him; his hands tremble slightly as his chest constricts at the same time; he suddenly feels like he's sixteen again and just found out that Kurt changed schools because of _him._ It's a different kind of ache, though, because seven years ago the sense of guilt was too overwhelming. He was such an ass, so freaking scared, so deeply hidden in his closet and such a coward…

Dave missed Kurt terribly when the boy left McKinley; he missed how he strutted down the hallways in his complicated and flashy clothes, with his chin raised high and perfect hair, and his soft voice while he spoke with his friends. Every day that went by with no sight of Kurt Hummel made Dave's time at McKinley that much harder to take. When the guilt and the longing turned unbearable, Dave begged his parents to let him transfer, promising he would raise his grades and stay out of trouble. But he didn't really leave what happened between the two of them at McKinley behind. If he had anyone to talk to about it, Dave would tell them the feelings he had for his first love are long gone; but now, in the solitude of his car, he has to admit the ghost of the whole Kurt deal has always been haunting him…

Seven years later and Dave finds himself in the same spot. Things are surely different, but not that much. Has he fallen for Kurt all over again? There are feelings there, of course, but Dave is not sure it's _love_. Kurt's gracious strut, his expensive outfits and his chin held high have been replaced with worn out clothes and a head ducked down between hunched up shoulders. Yet Kurt remains beautiful and, unlike seven years ago, Dave _knows_ him now.

There are going to be a lot more things to miss, like the sight of Kurt's gorgeous naked body, the scent of his skin, the taste of his mouth when they kiss and the faint moans when they fuck. But it's not just the sex; it's all of it. It's how Kurt glares at him when Dave does something nice for him, and his chipper voice when he talks about foreign cuisine. It's staring at Kurt's beautiful eyes closely, and listening to that low whistling sound when he sleeps, which Dave realizes now is, sadly, a product of his asthma.

It's just Kurt's whole presence, and that's a whole lot to miss.

But Dave fucked up. Kurt must think he's pathetic, which isn't far from the truth.

And now that all his ugly secrets have been pushed onto the light, Dave doesn't think he could stand having Kurt's eyes upon him, seeing all his failures. The more he considers pushing Kurt out of his life, the more determinate he grows. Maybe it's a good thing he won't be calling Kurt again, Dave considers, nodding to himself. He'll surely miss Kurt terribly, but Dave got over Kurt once, so he can do it again, even if that takes him another couple of years. It's got to be done, though, for Dave to put all his darkness away in some anonymous place where no one can see how damaged he is.

Dave starts driving back to work, numb and apathetic. When he stops at a red light on Lexington Avenue, his gaze falls upon a Body and Bath store. He drums his fingers on the wheel, feeling a rush of adrenaline going through his veins as the battle within him begins once again.

In the short time that takes the light go from red to green, he loses and Kurt wins, yet again, as always. Instead of resuming the drive back to work, he quickly looks for a place to park and when he finds one, Dave gets out of his car and walks towards the Body and Bath store.

He can't help it. He's not supposed to call Kurt again, and he was okay with that idea just minutes ago but there he is, in a store he would never walk into if it wasn't for Kurt.

"Good afternoon," a young girl greets him. "Welcome to Body and Bath, how can I help you?"

She's smiling at him, and Dave scratches the back of his head. "Er, I've never been in one of these stores before."

She keeps on smiling at him. "Are you looking for a present for someone?"

Dave remembers Kurt talking about facials and stuff like that back in high school; he also recalls that Kurt was looking for salts or something to enhance his bath, the night he found Dave's pills; he was so angry Kurt found his meds, but he was also upset about why Kurt was looking in his cabinets - because he can't even take proper showers at his place since the hot water runs out quickly. Hearing that really bothered Dave a lot.

He can't understand why he has this urgent need to spoil Kurt; it makes Kurt angry, but Dave likes doing it. Dave can't change Kurt's awful life, but he likes to think he can help at least in small ways. Getting Kurt tasty food, or his favorite coffee, a warm place, nice baths, enjoyable sex… He likes to take care of Kurt as much as he can; client or not, Dave likes being the one doing it because it seems that no one takes care of Kurt. And the truth is it's easier and more enjoyable to make Kurt feel better than doing the same for himself.

Dave raises his head high. Screw his embarrassment and humiliation. Kurt deserves to be pampered. Kurt deserves the world probably, and even if Dave can't change all the bad things in Kurt's life, at least he can give him one comfortable night.

So he nods. "Uh, yeah, I am."

"What do you have in mind?" the clerk asks him.

Dave shrugs. "Maybe bubble bath? I don't know. This person is very into grooming and I don't know much about stuff like that."

The clerk smirks. "Follow me."

The place drives Dave insane; he thinks Kurt would love everything the store offers, so basically he wants to buy everything. Forty-five minutes later, Dave leaves the place with two shopping bags filled with bubble bath and bath salts, soaps, body scrubs, shower gels, shampoos and conditioners.

Seeing Kurt on Monday is going to be humiliating, but he pictures Kurt taking a long and relaxing bath and that makes him feel a little better. Just a little.

Indulging Kurt. That's the key.

Kurt said how much he loved having sex with him. Dave knows he's a good fuck, his boyfriends and lovers always said so. But it's not something that makes Dave feel particularly proud; after all, being a good lay won't make people like him for longer than one night. But he's a good fuck for Kurt; he makes Kurt enjoy the thing that he probably hates the most because of random guys who touch and leer and fuck him over and over every night. That's got to count for something.

Dave tries to block those thoughts of what happens to Kurt at the VIP club. They just make him more depressed and queasy. He can't fix it; he can't just simply _make_ Kurt stop whoring himself. _If you can't fix something then there's no use worrying about it_, that's what his old therapist used to say. "Worry about what you can actually change," Dave mutters to himself, getting in the car.

He's lost his chance with Kurt. He can't change the fact that Kurt will never willingly chose to be with him. But still he can be something good for Kurt, at least for a while, and that's better than being the nothing he usually is.

* * *

><p>When Kurt walks through the door, he instantly knows there's something up with Dave. He can see it in Dave's eyes. Still, Kurt gives him a long kiss, because he's relieved. He spent the past week wondering about how the next meeting with Dave was going to be, <em>if<em> there was even going to be a next one. When he got a text from Dave earlier in the day, asking about tonight, Kurt exhaled deeply, as if he had been holding his breath for the entire week.

They break apart and Kurt cups Dave's cheek, examining him.

"Are you alright?"

There's a glimpse of a frown that quickly disappears, as if Dave realized he was frowning. "Hello to you, too," Dave only says, letting him in.

"Hi." Kurt pecks Dave on the lips once again. "Are you alright?"

"I'm good," Dave replies casually, taking Kurt's jacket and bag. "Why do you ask?"

Kurt can't really explain it, but there's _something_, some subtle change in Dave's demeanor. His expression is tranquil, almost too tranquil; and his eyes lack their normal shine.

Kurt would be lying if he said he hasn't spent every day of the past week thinking about Dave; worrying about Dave, in fact, and wondering how he was doing. Seeing him fall apart was soul-crushing. Kurt had to stop himself several times during the week from calling him, or even texting him. Dave said he's not suicidal, but still Kurt's not comfortable with the thought of Dave being alone with his self-deprecating ideas. Dave should not feel that way; the only bad thing that Kurt can find in Dave is that stupid thing of 'indulging the hooker,' but Kurt knows that's really more his issue than Dave's.

So he's greatly relieved to see that Dave is apparently okay, meaning 'okay' as in 'standing and speaking,' but God knows all the awful things that go through Dave's head. It kills Kurt to know that during all the time they've been together, Dave has been carrying around such terrible self-loathing and Kurt was completely clueless.

But Kurt tries to act cool, not to let Dave see how anxious he's feeling. "I don't know," he replies nonchalantly. "No reason, I guess." Yeah, something's definitely going on. But Dave says he's fine, and Kurt doesn't want to push it. He won't repeat the same mistake from the previous night they spent together.

Kurt's relieved when he sees a nice plate filled with Mexican food on the table. They're having dinner together again. After what happened at their last dinner, he was afraid that even if Dave called him again, they would skip dinner in order to avoid another fiasco. Putting aside the awareness that Dave is trying to feed him, Kurt has come to enjoy having dinner with Dave, even if they don't do it in the most conventional way. So he heads to his place at the table, sitting down as Dave moves to his spot by the coffee table.

"So how was your day?" Kurt asks, beginning what he hopes will be a casual conversation. Maybe it will help them both relax a little, even if Dave doesn't look as tense as Kurt is feeling.

"My day?"

Kurt gives an off-handed shrug, even though he knows Dave can't see him. "I always talk about foreign cuisine, just to talk about something that's not personal, but I guess since there are no more secrets between us anymore… You don't have to answer though," Kurt hurries to say, because maybe Dave had a terrible day or something. "I know it's personal and you don't have to talk with your hooker-"

"It was boring," Dave cuts him off nonchalantly. "Busy and boring, but that's most Mondays."

"No one likes Mondays."

"Well, today was busier than usual since one of my co-workers twisted his ankle over the weekend and he's on medical leave and will be for at least two weeks."

Kurt smiles a little at Dave's annoyed voice. It's almost normal, Dave's telling him a bit about his day; Kurt lets himself assume that Dave doesn't have a lot of people around to talk with. Dave's parents are still back in Lima, and Kurt can recall that Dave moved recently to New York from Boston. Dave might need some company as much as Kurt craves it.

Kurt imagines Dave is as lonely as himself, and knowing all the issues Dave has, it's understandable why he prefers to hire a hooker instead of finding himself a real boyfriend. Relationships force you to expose yourself to your partner, and you wouldn't need to do that with a hooker.

It makes sense now. Kurt wondered a lot why someone like Dave turned to a hooker, when he could easily find a nice guy to date.

Kurt needs to stop being nosy and start being more caring with Dave.

And while Kurt wants to ask Dave why he seems so… off, because he can _sense_ it, Kurt plays along in this normal conversation.

"That sucks. It means more work for you. Hate when that happens."

"How was _your_ day?"

Kurt smirks, because Dave is still curious about his second job and Kurt's still determined not to admit he works in MetFood. Silly, because what can be worse than supposedly being a hooker? Probably nothing, but the truth is that while he hates being a strip and lap dancer, at least at the VIP he is _some_ type of performer. Kurt is more genuinely _ashamed_ of being a supermarket cashier. It's the kind of job you get when you have no talent.

It could be worse though, almost. He could work in McDonald's.

"It was okay I guess," Kurt replies carefully. "Busy and I have to go tomorrow was well, to cover for a co-worker, but it's not bad since that means I'll have a free day in my pocket."

There's a small moment of silence, and Kurt assumes Dave's trying to narrow down the options of where Kurt might work.

"Flexible hours?"

"Our manager is pretty flexible with us. As long there's someone to cover the hours, she doesn't care who's actually working," Kurt explains, and he's not sure if it's store policy or just her, but Mrs. Clark, their manager, allows them to do that. Kurt knows nearly all the staff because they're all, himself included, always swapping shifts.

"How come?"

"I don't know, it's just like that at work. For example, tomorrow I'm covering for this girl; her sister's visiting from I don't know where and she needs to pick her at the airport. So she'll owe me a shift. Whenever I need to take the day off, I'll let her know and she'll cover for me. It helps a lot when I'm sick."

Kurt's friends with none of them, but he has to admit there's a cool spirit of camaraderie among the MetFood staff. He covers for co-workers when they have their children's school performances, or family weddings, exams and what-not. Mrs. Clark knows he likes to work extra hours to build up time off for sick days, so she calls him a lot to fill in for other people. Luckily, there's usually someone to cover for him when he's sick, though not enough to keep him from always owing the store work hours, since when Kurt gets sick, he skips way too many days. Three or four people can usually cover three or four shifts for him, but that's not enough for the seven or ten days he can't work.

"Don't you get paid sick leave?"

"No benefits like that," Kurt admits, remorsefully. "It's just a minimum wage job. We only get paid for the time we actually work. I'm not a convenient employee for any employer considering how often I get sick, so… I'm just grateful they let me keep the job. I'm trying to work as many extra shifts as I can now, because winter is coming and it's just the worst time of the year."

He can sense that their conversation is turning gloomy. Now Dave will surely start worrying and Kurt is determined to make Dave feel good. Kurt thinks they both need a break from their respective miseries.

"Kurt…"

"Enough about this," Kurt tells him brightly. "I don't want to talk about being sick and stuff. So are there a lot of people in your office?"

Thankfully, the conversation moves forwards perfectly. Dave tells him more about his work and Kurt listens to him with interest; at some point they look like friends, or so Kurt believes.

When they finish having dinner, Dave offers him a coffee and Kurt gladly accepts. They both take all the plates to the kitchen when the telephone rings. Dave excuses himself for a minute as he heads to the living room and Kurt puts the plates in the dishwasher, playing cool while he's actually paying attention to what Dave's saying.

"Hi, dad," Dave says in the distance and Kurt goes still, trying to hear more.

He continues doing the dishes, so Dave won't notice that Kurt's being silent in order to listen to his conversation. Kurt doesn't hear much though, but what he considers more important is that Dave doesn't sound upset or anything; even if he can't particularly hear what Dave's saying, it seems that he's just having an amicable conversation with his father.

Kurt sighs. He hates this. He has way too many problems of his own to occupy his mind with Dave's problems; it's stressing. But Dave is obviously suffering, even if he's trying not to show it. Kurt busies himself with coffee as soon as he's done with the dishes, and, feeling like adding a drop of milk to his coffee, he turns to Dave's fridge to get some.

Yet, when Kurt opens the fridge he stills for a second; it doesn't take longer than that to see Dave's fridge is painfully empty except for a 12-pack of Diet Coke. Hell, Kurt himself has more food at home than Dave! Kurt quickly closes the fridge, feeling sick to his stomach as his thoughts start racing. What's the deal with Dave? Starving himself until the next binge? With shaky hands, Kurt finishes preparing the coffees just when Dave returns to the kitchen.

"Sorry about that. My dad just wanted to say 'hello.'"

Kurt smiles at him, trying to put his thoughts away. "It's okay. My dad does the same. How's yours?" he asks casually, handing Dave's mug to him as they both head to the bedroom.

"Fine. He just wanted to check up on me, and also tell me about their vacation plans. He and my mom are going on a cruise for their anniversary."

As they walk to the bedroom, Kurt hears Dave talking but he doesn't really listen. Instead, Kurt's busy fighting the urge to hug Dave, or kiss him, or hug him and kiss him and promise him that everything's going to be alright.

Kurt wouldn't take for granted if someone showed up to say: _"Hey, Kurt, don't you worry. Things will be fine."_ He's well aware that his situation won't be fine for a very long time, and those words wouldn't fix anything in his life, but a little encouragement would be good. Maybe, Kurt doesn't know; no one has ever said that to him since he got out of the hospital. Why would they? His family believes he's living a big life in New York, and his neighbors and co-workers believe that his life has always been and will always be like this.

"_Things will be alright."_ It's an empty promise, Kurt knows, but he so wants to say those words. Dave wouldn't believe them, probably, but maybe just hearing them from someone would be comfort enough? _Someone_ needs to comfort Dave, Kurt believes.

When they reach the bedroom, Kurt puts his mug on Dave's bedside table and wraps his arms around Dave in a tight embrace. Dave stops saying whatever it was he was saying, as if taken by surprise, but after a few seconds, Kurt feels Dave's arms holding him close.

Kurt smiles a little, comforted, as if he was the one needing reassurance, instead of the one providing it. Dave's always so warm and strong; it's always pleasant for Kurt to have him close.

"Are you okay?" Dave asks after several seconds, since Kurt doesn't break apart.

Kurt smiles even more. "I am," he says, looking up to meet Dave's eyes and finding a slight hint of worry in Dave's gaze. Obviously, he thinks Kurt's the one that needs comfort, assuming something bad happened to him.

"Are you sure?"

"Can't I just hug you?" Kurt inquires playfully, not wanting to worry Dave.

Dave presses his lips together, staring at him like he's trying to read between the lines, but then Kurt feels Dave easing as the corners of his lips twitch slightly upwards. Kurt takes that as a smile, so he can call himself victorious.

"Anytime you want," Dave replies, playing cocky, and Kurt laughs as his chest grows warm.

This is nice. Just the two of them like this, without yelling at each other or meddling in each other's dark secrets. It's obvious that they can be tender and civilized, even caring towards each other; and Kurt finds himself growing content as he comforts Dave. Maybe this could be good for the both of them?

Kurt kisses him softly on the lips. "I'll keep that in mind."

They lay in bed, drinking their coffees while watching another 'Friends' re-run, and when Kurt finishes his drink, he leaves the empty mug in the bedside table and snuggles up to Dave, who embraces him tightly.

"You're pretty cuddly tonight," Dave points out, slightly amused.

"I like cuddling. I don't really have people to cuddle with and you happen to be great to cuddle."

"Is that so?"

Dave seems more amused and Kurt's glad since he really wants Dave to be the happiest he can be. Amused is not a synonym for happy, but at least Dave's not berating himself with awful thoughts.

"Well, I can't really cuddle with my customers, right?" Kurt states, not only because he has to keep his act fresh, but also because his misery always seems to make Dave want to pamper him, which apparently distracts Dave from hating himself. "True, you're a customer, but we have a big comfortable bed that happens to be very convenient to cuddle in."

Dave stares at him with an unreadable face, and for a few seconds Kurt fears that he just screwed everything up again. It wouldn't be a surprise, since apparently he's an expert at finding just the right words to upset David.

"_Would_ you cuddle with them, if you had a bed instead of that chair at your club?"

Kurt blinks. He definitely didn't see that coming and he's not even sure where that's coming from. For a couple of seconds, he actually pictures himself being intimate with the men he gives laps dances to, or the ones that leer at him when he's on stage _taking off his clothes__._ There's always a guy, some ugly stranger who touches him too much, or smacks his ass, or propositions him because, hey, he's just a freaking whore, right? But he's not a whore, and certainly not _theirs._

A shiver runs down his spine just by thinking about it, and about how he has no choice but to degrade himself at that club.

He burrows in closer to Dave, feeling pretty saddened. "No. I hate when they touch me, I told you so," he replies, quietly and truthfully.

"Hey, I'm sorry," Dave holds him tightly. "It's not my business. I shouldn't have asked that, I didn't mean to upset you."

Kurt shows a weak smile. "It's not your fault men are assholes."

Dave places a soft kiss on his neck. "But you don't mind if I touch you, right?"

Kurt snorts. "I think I was pretty clear when I said I love everything you do to me," he replies with a seductive tone of voice, leaving all his worries behind.

"Just checking," Dave says and they kiss, hard and heatedly.

It's as arousing as it's relaxing. And to think he almost missed all this because of his big mouth…

* * *

><p>Kurt wakes up about three or four hours later. He looks at the clock and it's almost two in the morning. The whole place is in perfect darkness but it doesn't take much for Kurt to realize that Dave's not sleeping next to him.<p>

"Dave?"

Kurt calls out to him again, receiving no answer. Worried, Kurt leaves the bed and takes Dave's grey cardigan once again, since it has practically become _his_, to cover his naked body. First he walks into the bathroom, only to find it empty, and then he heads to the living room.

He startles a bit when he actually finds Dave there. Kurt stands very still next to the door, just observing Dave; the moonlight coming through the window lets Kurt know that Dave is very awake, doing nothing but sitting quietly on the couch in his t-shirt and boxers, silent and motionless. For some reason, this image distresses Kurt a lot. Why the hell is Dave sitting in the dark at 2 a.m. in the morning? It's so depressing!

Oh.

"_Clinical depression, it's more like a constant state; you don't even think about it, it's just there. Sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse, but it's always there shadowing you and sucking your energy. And you're just…. Okay with that,"_ Dave explained to him.

Kurt frowns. Does this mean that Dave is getting _worse_? Kurt did notice that Dave looked different today. Like his eyes lacked shine, a glimpse of apathy… now that he sees David sitting like that, a melancholy aura surrounding him…

"Dave? Honey?" he tries sweetly.

Dave doesn't even flinch. Kurt wonders what happened to make Dave's usual depression worsen, but he doubts that Dave will tell him so he won't ask, because he'll probably just make Dave mad and not even get a proper answer in the process.

"David!" Kurt calls out loud and firm as he steps closer to the man.

Finally, Dave moves, turning his face to Kurt. "Hey… I'm sorry, did I wake you up?"

_Yeah, it's impossible to sleep through all your silence and stillness, _Kurt thinks to himself, but doesn't say it because it would sound bitchy. He just sits next to Dave and sighs.

"Not at all. I just woke up and you weren't there," he says, hugging himself out of habit to keep warm. The room is not cold since Dave has turned on the heating, but still.

"Insomnia," Dave explains simply. "I was tossing and turning in bed too much. Didn't want to wake you up."

"Does it happen often?"

"It comes and goes."

"Well, I'm awake now so I can keep you company," Kurt declares, laying down on the couch and stretching his legs out, resting them on Dave's lap. It's more comfortable than he expected.

Kurt's also trying to be as intrusive as he can, just to distract Dave from whatever it is he's thinking or worrying about. And even if Dave's mind was just blank – and it seemed to be - it's still not okay to be sitting there, staring at the nothing.

"You don't have to. You can go back to bed, I'm okay."

"I'll stay. My God, this couch is more comfortable than my own bed."

"I'm sorry for that."

"No need for you to be sorry," Kurt insists carefreely. "I'm just trying to say I like it here."

"I'm glad then."

A tranquil silence falls upon them, and Kurt just lies there, relaxed, as Dave rests his arms over Kurt's legs and his fingers start tracing random patterns over his ankle. Dave seems calm, and Kurt can't help feeling good about that.

Kurt's a little shocked to discover that here he is, laying on another man's couch, completely naked under a cardigan that's several sizes too big, with said man right there next to him, and yet, he's comfortable.

It's funny how much you can change when you have nothing left to lose.

He used to be the biggest prude. All his boyfriends certainly thought so. Of course, now he undresses in front of total strangers, but even after all this time he feels self-conscious about it. But this is different. Even if he doesn't look as good as he did before, if his once slender and toned body is now skinny and scrawny, if his complexion went from milky porcelain to dry pasty pale, for the first time in years, in here, with Dave, Kurt feels comfortable in his own skin.

Maybe it's different because Dave is neither a boyfriend nor some drunken, leering stranger. Dave is... a client. He pays Kurt for sex, but not out of pity. He desires Kurt, gets aroused by him, over and over. And Dave cares about Kurt, too; even when it annoys Kurt, he has to admit Dave's constant worry about his life is a sign of caring.

Kurt sighs. He spent nearly the whole week thinking about Dave. Right now all he wants to do is comfort Dave. That's a sign of caring as well.

If he thinks about it, it's pretty depressing. It only took becoming poor, sick, turning into a stripper, and masquerading as someone's personal hooker to finally be comfortable in his own skin and find someone to care about who genuinely cares about him, faults and all. It's kind of amazing, too, considering since they met again, the man has pretty much seen nothing but the worst of Kurt's life – the poverty, the stripping, the worn out clothes. Lord, Dave has even seen him during an asthma attack!

Luckily that didn't happen tonight when Dave choked him again. Kurt had almost forgotten about that kink that he's growing very fond of, until he felt Dave's hand around his neck and Kurt almost came right away.

"We could play 20 Questions," Kurt breaks the silence after a couple of minutes, laughing a bit, and thankfully, Dave laughs as well.

"I don't know about you, but something tells me we would suck at that game."

"Probably," Kurt muses, but now he's curious. "Seriously, though, can I ask you something? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. It's not important," he says, but then he considers that it might be.

Dave sighs, staring at Kurt, almost defeated. "Shoot."

"What's with the choking?" Dave's hands that were caressing Kurt's ankles still. Kurt can feel the tension in Dave, so he does his best to play carefree. "I mean, I don't know much about kinks because I don't have any, or at least I'm not aware that I have any, but… don't they, like, mean something? I don't mean to get all psychological or anything but -"

"You're rambling,"

Kurt laughs, nervously. "I guess I am. But it's because of my lack of knowledge in this department."

Dave's posture seems uneasy. "Don't you think it's like… _creepy_ that I do that? Perverted or something?"

Dave's voice is almost a whisper, and Kurt can see he's embarrassed. If you asked Kurt what he thought about kinks some weeks ago, before he met Dave again, he would probably have said they were kind of sick. Of course, at that point he would have been suffering from the lack of good sex during his entire existence.

But with Dave, Kurt lets himself go a little and his view on sex is completely different.

"Sexually speaking, I believe that perverts are guys who molest children, or people who get off on other people's suffering. So I don't think you're a creep or a pervert, David. I think there's nothing wrong if you enjoy it, your partner enjoys it and neither is hurting anybody."

Even in the almost darkness, Dave seems to relax and Kurt wants to slap him. Did Dave really think Kurt thought that way about him?

"I guess. Have you ever had a boyfriend that fucked up your sex life?"

Kurt frowns. "I don't understand."

"My first boyfriend was into choking. He also was the first person I ever slept with," Dave explains, sounding slightly more comfortable. "I always thought that sex, at least the first time, was going to be something, I don't know, sweet? Fuck, this is embarrassing."

Kurt can't help laughing. He has never had a sex talk with anyone but his father and that was seriously disturbing. He and his boyfriends never discussed intimacy, except when they were assuring him it was no big deal, they loved him anyway, all the while cheating behind his back. But this is _Dave_ so instead of blushing and change the subject, he's actually very interested. Kurt can't help feeling sexy and open-minded at finally having a sex talk with someone.

"Don't feel embarrassed. I expected the same from my first time. Did yours suck? Did he hurt you?" Kurt asks, now concerned because he's realizing that this might not be a nice memory.

Dave seems troubled and amused at the same time. "Not at all. But my ex was like, he liked rough sex. I'd never had sex before, and that was not what I expected. Of course to me, back then, being a virgin, finally I had a boyfriend and I finally got laid, and it was the hottest thing ever. So it wasn't tender or romantic, but it was still awesome."

"Then why did he ruin your sex life?"

"Well, he was like a very aggressive bottom. He liked being manhandled and stuff, and it was like he molded me for his pleasure. At first I was sort of scared, I didn't want to hurt him, I guess he taught me well, though, since I never actually_ hurt_ him. But then it ended up being the only sex I knew; it was hot and I got used to it, and it was sort of weird whenever we were soft."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Not the same case, though."

Obviously not the same case. The almost nonexistent vanilla sex with Blaine spread to all his later boyfriends, but Kurt can't blame Blaine for that.

"So my first boyfriend, he liked it hard, but choking was his thing. So he taught me how; you know, how to press, where, and for how long."

Kurt grins, interested. "So there are techniques and everything."

Dave snorts. "Well, you can do some serious damage if you press too hard where you actually don't have to press."

Well, yeah, but Kurt hadn't considered it.

"What's the meaning of it?"

"Of choking and being choked?"

"I know it's a kink. Have you heard of BDSM? Guys who like to play submissive roles are actually people who in their ordinary life are big leaders of companies and stuff."

"Sounds more like a game than a kink."

"How come?"

"Well, a couple can… I don't know, use some bright colored fuzzy furry handcuffs when they're feeling extra playful in bed. They'll call it bondage, but people who are _really_ into bondage would laugh in your face if you showed them those handcuffs."

"You're into bondage?"

"Not really, but I know some stuff. But people really into bondage get off on tying someone down, on taking hours to make the perfect knots, not just into fucking while the one you're fucking can't use their hands."

Kurt is feeling slightly turned on, and for once, he's not embarrassed about it.

"So what do you feel when you choke someone? What's the meaning of choking?"

Dave's the one grinning. "What do _you_ feel when I choke you?"

"I asked first." He knows he's dodging the question because he's not sure if he can put into words what he feels when Dave chokes him. "You don't have to answer," Kurt hurries to say, since Dave might not be able to articulate it, either.

"Assuming you like it, since you have said that, physically it's more pleasant for you than it is for me. The lack of oxygen, timed with an increase in sexual rhythm… the sudden burst of air combined with the endorphins released during sex is a heightened thrill."

Kurt doesn't realize he's holding his breath. Dave's not seducing him, but Kurt is still getting more and more absorbed with every word he speaks. And Dave's describing perfectly what he feels physically when he's choked.

"But it's all in your head; our heads. It's even more erotic than sex itself because it's as pleasurable as it's dangerous," Dave finishes, his voice even.

Kurt's mouth has gone dry by this point. "Then what do you feel?"

Dave shrugs. "Control? Trust? I'm basically playing with depriving my lover of the most basic element needed to stay alive. My exes obviously trusted me enough to take control of their freaking air, letting me decide for them when to _breathe_, trusting that I wouldn't hurt them. It's a huge turn on; hard sex aside, control is a powerful turn on."

"The lack of it it is as well," Kurt says, before he can even think about it and Dave smiles at him, knowingly.

"I guess so. I've never been the _gasper_, as they call it. But sex is one thing, and kinks, real kinks are something different, because in a sexual way you're exposing to someone else something that belongs to your very depths."

Kurt's definitely aroused by now, but before he jumps on Dave he wants to know more.

"But that was just you're first boyfriend. You said you had two. Why did the first one ruin your sex life?"

Dave shrugs again. "Because what I got used to and came to desire is not something most guys want. I've have my fair share of one nightstands, but you can't choke strangers. Sometimes I believe he actually knew he could awake that side of me, and that's why he went after me."

Kurt frowns, since it's a pretty sad way to think. "I don't think-"

"By some huge coincidence," Dave quickly ignores what Kurt was about to say. "My second boyfriend was also into breath play. I couldn't fucking believe it. Second boyfriend was even bolder than first one, but I guess we did fine."

"I can't imagine how it can get bolder."

"Fainting games?"

"What?!"

"We did it only once," Dave says, like he's bothered about it.

"You choked him until he passed out?!" Kurt sits up straight, gaping at Dave.

"Hey, you asked!"

"I'm sorry! I'm not trying to be rude," he replies, honestly. "I'm just... surprised, that's all. It sounds… _extreme._"

"Believe me, it is. It was his idea, not mine," Dave sighs and continues. "He always wanted to try it, but he never trusted his previous partners enough. But since I did it so well..."

Even though Kurt knows he should be horrified to some extent, he's actually curious. Not because he wants to try it, since it sounds terrifying, but seriously, how can you choke someone until they faint? How can you actually want to be choked until you faint?

"But why? I mean, I'm speaking out of ignorance in the subject, Dave. I'm just curious. I don't want to be nosy or anything."

"_You_ don't want to be nosy?" Dave asks, incredulous.

Kurt raises a brow. "Look who's talking."

Dave snorts. At least they can laugh about this now. "It never even crossed my mind that people did such a thing until I met him. He said it was a way… to _commit_ with each other. After all, what says 'I trust you' more than letting someone choke you until you pass out, right?"

Dave actually sounds bitter about it, so Kurt doesn't understand. "Was it bad? You don't sound pleased."

"It was scary. At the same time, I was confident that I wasn't going to hurt him. Afterward I realized that it wasn't really about trusting each other. He was confident in my skills and that I cared about him, and he wanted to make the sex more interesting. But I thought it meant something more about how we loved each other or some shit like that."

Kurt feels actually sadden about those words. "You sound like neither of your exes really loved you."

"I think didn't really love them, either," Dave replies, not sounding very bothered about it. "We were just convenient to each other; I don't resent them for that. It doesn't mean I didn't care about them, or that they didn't care about me."

They're slowly creeping into yet another treacherous and sad subject –it seems that everything they talk about has a risky side - so Kurt has to act quickly.

"And how was it?" he asks, deciding that sticking to the sex part is the safest option. He can't just radically change the topic of conversation and ask about the freaking weather.

"Making him pass out?"

"Well, duh!"

"Great, I guess. Incredibly hot since it was control at highest level. Pleasantly scary. It didn't last long, for obvious reasons; as soon as he passed out I was already shaking him awake. According to him it was the best orgasm in his life."

"But you did it only once."

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I told you. For him it wasn't about deepening our emotional connection or whatever. He just wanted mind-blowing orgasms. And I had a mind-blowing orgasm that time, too, but afterward, when I fully absorbed what I'd done, I kind of freaked out. 'Cause it's a big freaking deal," Dave states, firmly. "I mean, choking someone like that? Once I realized it meant something very different for him than it did for me, I never agreed to do it again."

Kurt thinks about that. He remembers how the French call orgasms _le petit morte_, 'the little death'… but how freaking scary is losing your air until the lights go out? He starts getting what Dave means about the trust thing; you're literally putting your life into someone else's hands, trusting that they won't go too far and accidentally strangle you.

It's actually terrifying.

Kurt should know. He doesn't think he'll ever forget that day when the asthma attack wouldn't go away, how no medications were helping, how the oxygen in his veins was decreasing with every minute that went by, how the panic felt just before he fainted. Kurt did wake up, but he might not have.

It's not a perfect comparison, though. Kurt can't decide when his asthma will cause him to stop breathing, he can only try to mitigate the effects. But it actually feels incredible to give Dave that control. _Dave._

Kurt's has been on his own, taking care of himself for almost three years and then Dave comes along and it's _good_ for a little while, to pass the control to him. It's physically pleasant while they do it, just the way that Dave described. And the mere idea of doing something kinky makes it even more arousing.

But the more Kurt thinks about it, it starts turning scary because he has never given so much of himself in bed as he does with Dave, and it goes beyond the physical. It _pleases_ Kurt to be someone Dave can take pleasure from. In spite of Dave's roughness, Kurt never feels damaged, pained or distressed; if anything, he feels sexy, adventurous and taken care of, because with every delicious scratch, every bruise and every squeeze, Dave cherishes him.

But why does he trust Dave with such intimacy? Although he's not a stranger, it's still Dave, and they've been together for not even two months now. Actually, that's the thing. They haven't been _together_; they just have a very stormy client-hooker relationship, and yet, he willingly gives Dave access to places that Kurt never allowed any of his lovers to even get near. Places that Kurt didn't even know were hidden deep inside himself.

What the hell is he getting himself into? He mustn't take this so seriously, mustn't imagine there's something deeper between them. The truth is that there's nothing between them other than sex, money, and the crap they dish out at each other.

"You shouldn't let me do it," Dave breaks the silence. "I do it without being aware of it sometimes, it's almost a habit. And it's hard not to do it when you ask me to, but I'd appreciate if you didn't."

Kurt stares at him, frowning. It's almost like Dave was reading his mind, and he actually agrees. Kurt knows that this is a dangerous business, and not precisely because Dave might hurt him without meaning to. Yet, Kurt quickly grins at Dave, pretending he's not having deep thoughts about this; he's just the hooker, that's all, just the whore who wants Dave to have a good time, nothing more. He's not ready to give up on this kink and the feelings it brings him, but there will be no more choking tonight. Dave said 'it's not okay to abuse it' and since Dave knows more about this, Kurt doesn't object. Yet, it doesn't mean they have to stop having sex altogether and the night is young.

"I'm here to get you off," Kurt states, using his best flirty tone of voice and sensually crawling onto Dave's lap.

Dave laughs quietly. "I don't need to choke you to get off."

Dave holds him by his hips, but he's staring at him with amused eyes and Kurt doesn't like it in the slightest. It's almost like Dave's not taking him seriously.

"I know you like it, but..."

"But?"

Dave looks right into his eyes, and there's no amusement in his gaze now. "But this is your pair of bright colored fuzzy furry handcuffs."

Kurt blinks. Then he blinks again, because he didn't expect Dave to say that. For a fraction of second he wants to argue, because Kurt's not just a silly guy playing with fire, as Dave believes. But if he's not, then what is he? Suddenly, Kurt's not sure where he stands in this whole deal.

But he laughs, because Dave did a remarkable job at leaving him speechless. "Shut up," Kurt says maturely, and since he doesn't know what else to say, he kisses Dave.

* * *

><p>When Kurt wakes up again it's late morning. He's quickly getting used to waking up alone in Dave's apartment. As usual, it's very warm, but Kurt's starting to give up on being annoyed with Dave for turning the heat on for him.<p>

Kurt stares at the alarm clock and it's ten past eleven, so he grabs Dave's cardigan yet again to cover his naked body and heads to the kitchen to get himself a coffee. He still has some time to have breakfast, take a bath and go back home to pick up his uniform for his shift at MetFood.

The money is in the dining table, but Kurt doesn't even look at it. He gets his coffee and goes to the living room, where he sits on Dave's comfortable couch and turns on the TV, not really paying attention on what's on.

While he drinks his delicious coffee, Kurt decides not to think about the whole choking conversation; it's pointless trying to find a deeper meaning in stuff that should not have any meaning at all. Instead, he thinks about Dave and lets himself feel pretty much victorious. In spite of his major screw up the other night, he and Dave are back together; Kurt smiles at that thought.

And they made a lot of progress: they joked about meddling in each other's business. They talked about personal stuff casually and even deeply without arguing, yelling or wanting to smack each other.

Kurt feels that being attentive to Dave could work. Dave already looked better after their second round, so maybe Kurt can help a little to make Dave forget about whatever is that troubles him. Maybe Kurt can't fix Dave's life, but if he can give him a rest…

Kurt presses his lips together when they announce the weather forecast: 53 degrees. It's quickly getting cold, but it could be much worse. He won't defeat winter, but this year Kurt's going to try to get through it better. He's buying his brand new stove in three weeks.

Once he's done with his coffee, Kurt washes the mug and then heads to the bathroom. He's about to turn the faucets on when he notices that right on the end of the tub there's a large display of bathing and body care products.

He rolls his eyes and laughs quietly, not having the strength to get mad at Dave for this.

"You bastard," Kurt whispers, as he starts running the bath.

He takes some of the products, inspecting them. They all look very fancy. Even though he knows that they are _all for him_, Kurt finds it hard to choose one to start with. He feels like a kid in a candy store; he's happy and excited because it's been so long since he took such a quality bath. Far from wanting to strangle Dave for pampering him, Kurt is thankful and thrilled.

Of course, Kurt does his best not to notice that.


	13. Chapter 12

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.**  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> **Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.**  
><strong>Rating:<strong> **R.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> **Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Mentions of bulimia. Depression.**  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> **Season One and Two.**  
><strong>Beta:<strong> **Katie!**  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> **79oo this chapter.**  
><strong>Genre:<strong> **Romance/Angst/Drama.**  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> **Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.**  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves. But then one night they meet again, in an unexpected way and in an unexpected place and everything changes.**  
><strong>AN:** **I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter<strong>** 12**

The next couple of weeks flow by smoothly and Dave feels relatively content, or as content as he believes he can feel. His eating habits are not getting any better; if anything, they're getting much worse, but his mood improves when Kurt is around. During the past two weeks, Dave was able to gradually leave the embarrassment and the anxiety he constantly felt in the presence of Kurt behind him.

Resignation did well for him, he concludes. Once he accepted that he's a fuck up—and now that Kurt is more than aware of that—there's nothing much he can do.

Dave has to admit that Kurt's mood has a lot to do with it. It's true that they already know the worst about each other and, because of it, they don't need to walk on eggshells anymore. Still, Kurt seems chipper and he's constantly acting sweet around him. In addition, Kurt stopped putting up resistance every time Dave indulges him somehow; the bitch face is still there, of course, but Kurt doesn't argue anymore.

To be honest, Dave doesn't know what Kurt's deal is, but at the same time, Dave doesn't—and didn't—know Kurt at all. Maybe this is just Kurt, once he pushes aside all the problems he has to deal with. Maybe Kurt got used to Dave and this is just the way he usually is when he's comfortable with someone; they _have_ been seeing each other for two months after all. But Dave's mind also returns to the possibility that this is just an act that Kurt is putting up. If that's the case, he has to say that Kurt's a great actor.

Dave doesn't question this much because Kurt's mood is infectious. Their interaction is now fluid and relaxed, and it's impossible for Dave not to emulate Kurt's behaviour.

"I swear to God, it was one of the best things I've ever seen," Kurt states while they're both in the kitchen preparing their regular, after-dinner coffee. "It was so much fun! You should have seen it. Thank God I had to cover for Bren again or I would have missed it."

Kurt was just telling Dave about the new Drag Tuesday that was held at The VIP the night before. Apparently, since it wasn't very busy day, some of Kurt's co-workers went to Princess -Dave discovered that the bartender is actually the owner of the place- with the idea of dragging up and putting on a few shows, just to have fun.

Dave smiles at Kurt; it's hard not to when Kurt is so excited. "What did they do?"

"Sweet Pea and Celine each had one number," and then Kurt elaborated, "you know, _lip syncing_."

Learning the names of Kurt's workmates had been difficult for Dave, mostly because Kurt did not refer to them by their actual names, but by their stage names. Dave was forced to recall that Kurt is actually _Babyface_, and that only served as a big reminder of what Kurt does for living. But Dave got used to Kurt talking about his jobs, though he mostly talks about The VIP. Kurt's conversations about his job normally revolve around his workmates—how he occasionally will cover for this guy Bren, who's currently attending a community college, or how the dancers pick their own outfits for the shows, his co-workers dances, and things like that—and never about what _he_ does, including his clients, and for that Dave is thankful.

Dave tells Kurt about his job as well, since they're used to talking about their everyday lives. He wishes that working at The VIP wasn't a part of Kurt's ordinary life, but there isn't much that Dave can do about that.

"Neither of them are drags, but Sweet Pea's roommate _is_ and he landed them a couple of dresses that, let me tell you, were fantastic," Kurt tells him as Dave hands him his coffee.

"Watch it, it's hot."

"Got it," Kurt says, blowing on his drink. "I've always assumed that drag dresses were kind of tacky, but these were amazing. I should check on RuPaul's Drag Race to educate myself more about this."

Dave laughs, blushing a bit. "I actually used to watch that show."

Kurt stares at him intensely and Dave feels very stupid.

"Who would have thought? Former jock David Karofsky would grow fond of drag reality show."

"Oh, shut up. It was awesome. Once I get you to watch it, you'll understand what I'm talking about. It's addicting. After they show all the contestants you end up watching the entire season because you need to find out who's going to win."

"You are aware that you are now obligated to get me some episodes, right?"

"I will. I promise."

Kurt smiles in achievement. "As I was saying, Sweet Pea performed Cher's _Believe_, and Celine—you're going to fall out of your chair when I tell you…"

Dave gets his coffee and they both move to the living room, since they decided to watch a movie together. They did the same last week; Kurt actually mentioned that, having no TV and not wanting to invest any money in going to the movies, he hasn't watched a movie in years. There is no way he could take Kurt to the theatre as that would scream _date_, but at least there is plenty on TV for the two of them to watch.

"What happened?" Dave asks, somewhat amused. Yes, he really likes when Kurt's like this.

"He performed _Young Hearts Run Free_; go ahead, faint."

Dave's eyes go wide; he didn't see that coming. "Candi Staton?"

"Woah! You actually know gay culture," Kurt states, visibly impressed, sitting down and snuggling next to Dave.

That's another thing that drives Dave insane, but he's getting used to; Kurt's very affectionate. Dave definitely doesn't mind, but it was confusing at first when Kurt would peck him on the lips out of nowhere—while they're close to each other, not doing anything sexual, or saying hello or goodbye. Random hugs, snuggling, and other displays of affection still catch Dave off guard and in a good way.

He assumes Kurt needs affection. After all, Kurt said it himself; he doesn't have people to hug, his clients only want sex from him, and knowing what Dave knows about Kurt's life, he definitely needs at least a comforting hug.

"I'm gay; I've been to gay bars on plenty occasions, you know?" Dave says, not really offended. "What happened with Celine Dion? Don't you all call him that way because he sings only Celine Dion's songs?"

"According to him, he wasn't betraying her because he wasn't really singing," Kurt shrugs. "We all agreed that he did betray her, so we're never going stop reminding him. Anyway, people really loved it! We didn't even serve the tables because everyone was so into the show, including us."

"That's cool."

"Cool? It was incredible. There might only have been twenty people, tops, considering that it was the first time we tried this and it being on a Tuesday _before midnight_, but the crowd was ecstatic—especially during the chorus of _Young Hearts_ when Celine lost his wig," Kurt says and starts laughing. "I honestly thought I was going to wet my pants."

The warmth in Dave's chest starts expanding throughout his body; if there's anything that Dave still isn't used to, it is Kurt's laugh. If Dave thought Kurt had a beautiful voice, then his laugh is something magical and it makes his body tingle all over. Kurt doesn't laugh often, and Dave imagines that he must have very little to laugh about, but it's such a cheerful sound that sometimes Dave wishes he could reach out and tickle Kurt if it means being able to hear that sound a while longer.

Dave smiles at Kurt. "You should start working on Tuesdays so you won't have to miss the next show," Dave says quickly, before Kurt could notice how he had been staring dumbly at him.

"On a Tuesday? I don't think so. I'll try to convince them to do the shows on a night I work."

"So what do you want to watch?" Dave asks, picking the remote. "There are plenty of movies."

"Anything that wasn't recommended by _Paul,"_ Kurt states, grimacing.

Paul is actually one of Dave's co-workers. After the first movie night Dave had with Kurt, he was eager to arrange a second, but didn't know what movie they should watch together, not being very up to date regarding Hollywood, after all. When Dave asked for movie suggestions from his workmates while having drinks after work on Friday, Paul recommended the last Mark Wahlberg movie.

Dave laughs because he nearly neglected to mention to Kurt, "You know, I told him that his movie recommendation sucked, but he only found that awesome considering that we're both gay and the fact that the movie has a shirtless Mark Wahlberg."

"I don't know if I should be offended by that assumption or glad that you're co-workers are so accepting with your sexuality."

Just as Dave is about to turn on the TV, they're interrupted by a fainted classic iPhone ringtone. They frown at each other, and Dave immediately knows it's not his phone due to the unfamiliar ringtone.

"Your phone?"

Kurt nods, getting up. "Must be someone asking me to cover for them at work."

It's almost ten in the evening, so Dave assumes it must be something urgent that would require Kurt to cover for someone in the morning, despite Kurt not having to work mornings. Dave hopes that is not the case as he recently discovered an incredible cupcake house where he bought cupcakes for Kurt to have with his coffee for breakfast. Dave doesn't want Kurt to miss out and not only because he knows Kurt would love them; it's also because if Kurt doesn't eat those cupcakes tomorrow, Dave will have to, and during the past week he already had more than one cupcake-related binge, thanks to that fancy store.

Dave's gaze stays on Kurt as the other walks towards the coat rack and searches the pockets of his old jacket for his phone. He has a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach when he sees Kurt frowning at the screen, and gets up as well, approaching Kurt who looks up at him with a confused gaze.

"It's my neighbour," Kurt whispers and answers the phone. "Chantal? What- hey, calm down. _What_?"

Dave also knows who Chantal is; Kurt has told him about the black lady that lives across from him, and Haley, Cody, and their new-born, Kit. Dave knows that Chantal is a person whom Kurt seems very fond of, and normally he wouldn't worry about Kurt receiving a call from her; however, Kurt's eyes are wide with shock and concern is etched upon his face. Dave's feels as though his heart has stopped beating entirely and he knows that the news can't be good.

"Oh, God," Kurt groans, covering his face with his hand. "I'm nowhere near... I'm just- yes. God, thank you, Chantal. I've just… Okay, okay. I'll try to be there as soon as I can. Yes, I know I'm… Okay, thank you. To all of you, I'll see you soon."

"What happened?" Dave gushes out as soon as Kurt hangs out.

"Someone broke into my apartment," he announces, with a tired voice as he picks up his jacket. He looks at Dave with apologetic eyes. "I'm sorry, but I have to go back. They broke the door and-"

"Hey, it's okay," Dave cuts him off. He's torn between the sadness that is caused by Kurt having to leave and the sadness that is caused by having to see bad things continually happen to Kurt. "Do you need anything? I can give you a ride so you can get there faster. It's pretty late and you said your neighbourhood is shady at night."

"All the more reason why you shouldn't give me a ride. I remember your car. It might not be a Bentley, but it's definitely too nice for my neighbourhood."

Dave bites his lower lip, feeling useless. Should he give Kurt money? They only had dinner together and Kurt probably wouldn't take it. Dave doesn't know what to do. Kurt lives in a shady neighbourhood and now his door is broken. Kurt can't _stay_ there. Not when he has to pay for new door or to get it fixed.

"You don't have to worry," Kurt tells him, forcing Dave out of his trance.

This seems like it affects him more than it affects Kurt. Kurt is just putting on his jacket, staring at him with a resigned sympathetic smile.

"They broke into your apartment," Dave says plainly, as if this wasn't the reason Chantal called Kurt.

"Well, it's not like I have anything valuable to- oh, _God_," his face suddenly pales and Dave's stomach sinks once again. This cannot be good. Kurt bends over like he's about to get sick. Dave rushes to his side fearing for an asthma attack, but Kurt straightens his back; worry and despair is written all over his face. "Can you take me home?"

Dave quickly grabs his coat and keys. "Let's go."

Kurt doesn't say a word on their way to the parking lot, but, unlike before, he's visibly anxious and uneasy; in addition, Kurt uses his inhaler a couple of times and that makes Dave grow more nervous. Dave is not sure if he should ask, since he doesn't want to be a pain in the ass for Kurt right now, but his head is a mess with the urge to do something to fix... _anything_ and he's failing to figure out what he can do to make Kurt feel better.

They both get inside the car, and Kurt gives Dave his address. Since he knows nothing of New York, he puts the address on his GPS for directions.

"It's going to be okay," Dave says trying to be assuring.

Kurt lets out a short and uneasy laugh. "I seriously doubt it."

Around twenty minutes later they near Kurt's neighbourhood and Dave does his best to hide his frown. It really doesn't look like a safe place to live, and it's definitely far from the sort of place Dave imagined Kurt to be living in after leaving McKinley. Back then, Kurt was definitely a Manhattan boy, and he bites his lower lip when he remembers that Kurt actually got to live in Manhattan until he lost it all. Dave can only imagine how hard that must have been for Kurt, the transition from Manhattan to this place, especially when Kurt was recovering from almost dying and without a cent and no one to rely on.

"It looks worse now that it's dark, but it's really not that bad," Kurt speaks up, probably reading Dave's face.

"I beg to differ; someone broke into your apartment tonight."

"I've been living in here for over two years and this is the first time that something like this has happened to me. And it's the best that I can afford, so I'm not complaining."

Dave won't discuss that, since it's not his place. He's more than sure that Kurt wouldn't live in here if he could help it; Kurt obviously can't afford anything better and Dave won't be such a bastard to point that out.

Yet, it gets gradually worse. Kurt starts giving directions as they reach his street, and the entire block is awful. Dave is built pretty big –disastrous weight aside— and he's also played sports, so he's quite strong; he can defend himself, and Kurt, if someone tries to jump them, but still… The streets are pretty scary.

"That's the building, the one with the big graffiti," Kurt points out, unbuckling his seat belt.

_You've got to be kidding me._ Dave thinks to himself.

Dave can count the number of windows that are in one piece with the fingers on one hand; the rest are broken or mostly taped. The building is practically in the corner where a very shady looking park starts, and Dave's frown intensifies when he realizes that it's not a park, but an empty lot. If this was a movie, it would be the perfect place to get mugged and stabbed to death.

"I'm really sorry about this, but thanks for dropping me off," Kurt says hurriedly as Dave parks his car.

"I'm coming with you."

"What? No. You're not going to-"

"I'm not going to let to you go in there alone."

Kurt stares at him with his eyes full of venom, and God it's been so long since the last time they argued. "I don't need your protection here. This is my home."

"I don't mean to offend you, but someone tried to break into your place and I just want to make sure you're going to be okay."

"It's not of your business and really, David, I don't have time for to discuss this right now."

"Then don't," Dave states as he cuts off the engine and gets out of the car.

He catches Kurt rolling his eyes, but they don't argue anymore. Instead, Kurt starts walking towards the building and Dave follows. The inside of the place is even worse than the outside. It's almost dark; there are just a couple of light bulbs here and there faintly illuminating the hallways and stairs. Dave steps over pools of water and when he looks to the ceiling, he notices water dripping from gaping holes. The hall is garbage-chocked; piles of liquor bottles fill a corner of the lobby and the stench of the place is hideous, but Dave makes no comment.

Kurt passes by what seems to be a very broken elevator and starts climbing the stairs two by two. By the time they reach the second floor, Dave guesses this building has at least over a hundred housing code violations, if not more.

Once they get to the third floor, Dave notices a bunch of people in the hallway and they all approach Kurt as soon as they spot him. Kurt has talked to him about them, so Dave can now place faces to the names that Kurt mentioned to him. It's pretty easy: the black lady is obviously Chantal, the young ones are Haley and Cody and the guy that looks stoned is Jeff.

"Kurt! Kurt, thank God!" Chantal is the first to hurry towards him. "We've been in here, just in case-"

"It's okay. Thank you," Kurt replies to her, walking fast to his apartment.

They all follow, Dave himself included. Kurt looks devastated when he sees the door; it seems that it was kicked in because the lock is in pieces as well as parts of the door that litter the floor. Dave realizes that entire door will have to be replaced and judging by the way that Kurt's rubbing his face with his hands, he's just making this realization too.

Kurt quickly disappears from his sight as he goes through what Dave can only guess is the kitchen door; in the meantime, Dave takes a good look around. The lights are already on, so he assumes that the neighbours turned them on previously. It happens to be a studio apartment, and the first thing that Dave notices is that he feels cold; it's weird because the weather was just fine on the streets yet in here, but Dave feels his hands begin to chill rapidly. Kurt should not live in a place like this considering how often he gets sick. And, _God_, Dave thinks to himself, _Kurt hates being cold_.

The place is not a complete mess, but it's still a mess. The burglars must have gone through all of Kurt's stuff in order to find something of value, and it enrages him. Kurt's completely broke; he lives in this freaking wrecked building. Why would anyone want to target him?

Kurt doesn't have much, Dave notices quickly. There's a bed, a stool that serves as a bedside table, and what would be a two door closet if one of the doors had not been missing. All the clothes were strewn upon the floor. Then there's makeshift bookshelf made out of bricks and planks, and, next to it, a small table with two chairs. The only thing that they have in common is that it's all lawn furniture, but from different sets.

And that's it.

In spite of it being a studio apartment, the place is actually pretty large and the few, random pieces of furniture makes the room look sparse and desolate. Dave feels himself growing more and more despondent with every new humidity stain that he discovers on Kurt's walls. The place is disheartening and it doesn't look like Kurt took a lot of time to make a home out of it, during the over-two-years he's been living in there.

Dave can't find any personal object; no photos, or paintings or even a freaking house plant. It seems a deposit for some pieces of furniture and clothing. Dave didn't expect this; even with Kurt's small income. Dave still remembers Kurt as a person who was into fashion and appearance. Sure, Kurt doesn't wear any flashy outfits anymore, but, still, Dave expected Kurt to at least give his house some kind of personal touch. Even if Kurt is poor, Dave imagined would have picked stuff from the streets for his own DIY projects, making the best out of what he has; a fashion statement. The difference that five years can make in Kurt's life is disheartening.

Dave is sure that Kurt is far from being a happy person, but actually standing in what Kurt calls his 'home' makes Dave reconsider how sad Kurt must really be.

Kurt's neighbours are beginning to carefully pick up the stuff that's on the floor, trying to restore some semblance of order, but Dave can hardly move. The powerlessness he's feeling is overwhelming; he's mad at the world because this is so fucking unfair, Kurt should not have to live like this. He thinks about how unhealthy a place this is for Kurt since it's cold and humid; this does any good to Kurt's weak health and his asthma.

But Dave snaps out of it when Kurt returns from the kitchen, walking slowly; his eyes are wide open, like he's seen a ghost, and he's holding a big, empty, glass jar in his arms. Kurt sits in his bed, not really saying anything.

"I was so scared, Kurt," Chantal speaks, concerned. "I heard noises, but when I walked out to see what was going on, they were already running away. I saw the broken door and I was afraid you were inside and that they did something to you."

"We saw them running upstairs, they were just two kids," Haley, adds. Dave would smile at the sight of the baby she's holding if he wasn't so upset. "Cody and I were getting back from the grocery store and they ran into us. We didn't realize they came from here until we saw Chantal in the hallway."

Kurt nods mutely. "That's fine."

"Must be some of the kids from upstairs," Jeff interjects. "They look like trouble."

Dave just wants to disappear from here, taking Kurt with him; then he notices that Kurt's staring at his bookshelf very intensely.

"Are you okay, Kurt? God, I know you're not but-"

"They took my nebulizer too," Kurt whispers but everyone hears, and it seems that everyone in the room is aware of Kurt's breathing troubles because they all react, in some way, to the bad news. Dave has trouble functioning; this gets only worse.

Chantal, sits by Kurt's side, offering him a tight hug; Kurt just rests his head on her shoulder, and she kisses on his forehead. "You can't catch a break, can you?"

Kurt shrugs slightly, not saying anything and Dave feels he's going to be sick at any moment.

"Listen, I have a chain and a lock," Jeff offers. "You're not gonna find a locksmith at this hour, but you can't sleep in here with an open door."

"You shouldn't sleep in here, even with the lock. Want to spend the night with us? We can prepare the couch for; Kit won't bother you, you know she sleeps through the night," the young mother says.

Two of Dave's brain-cells finally make synapses, and finally he's able to speak. "You're coming back with me."

Dave's almost prepared to argue with Kurt about this, but Kurt just looks at him blankly and nods, like he doesn't care much. For some reason, Dave would have preferred Kurt arguing with him.

Jeff leaves the apartment, presumably to look for the lock and the chain and finally Kurt gets up, leaving the empty jar on the bed and walks to the closet, picking all the clothes from the floor and putting them back on the closet. Kurt keeps a few items—sweaters, as far as Dave can tell—and places them inside his bag.

"I can clean up in here."

"There's no need, Chantal, but thanks," Kurt replies tenderly. "I'll do it tomorrow."

Dave walks toward the bed, staring at the jar that Kurt was holding seconds before and he frowns when he notices that there's a small calendar stuck to the side of it, along with the picture of a stove. He leans over to take a closer look and his heart literally clenches when he sees the words 'Stove Fund.' Little Xs were drawn over every day on the calendar since July—like Kurt has been counting down the days. Dave swallows hard as he spots a big circle on the 17th of November. That's just a couple of weeks ahead.

He gets it all of sudden; why Kurt first rushed to the kitchen where the jar was and why he was holding it so tightly, with glassy eyes. He understands why Kurt was relaxed at first at the prospect of having burglars in his apartment, and then getting anxious as any other person would be. Dave sits on Kurt's bed because he feels dizzy. This had been his 'something of value'.

Someone knocks at the door, and when they all look up there's a lady looking through the door. Kurt's neighbours seem to be pretty close to him and care about him, so Dave assumes they don't really know this person as they stare at her like they've never seen her face before.

"Hi, I'm sorry for bothering you," the lady says, walking in. "You can't imagine how ashamed I'm feeling right now, but I believe my son has stolen this from you."

She's holding something white that Dave can't see very well, but Kurt recognizes it right away and he rushes towards the lady. "Oh, thank God. Thank you, thank you so much," he gushes, and the relief in Kurt's voice is so obvious that's almost painful.

It turns to be the nebulizer, and Kurt grabs it and holds it like it's the most precious thing in the world.

Dave wants to die; ever since Kurt got that call, Dave feels like someone stabbed a knife through his stomach and with every little thing that Dave sees regarding Kurt, it's like that knife is being twisted and twisted, ripping his insides.

"I'm very sorry," the lady says, ashamed. "I promise that as soon as I get him… He's a good kid, but ever since he started hanging out with those guys at the park… God, now he's stealing stuff! I found this in his room. I heard that someone had broken into a neighbour's apartment and my apartment is right above yours. I always hear when you get sick, so when I saw the nebulizer I realized it was you."

_Fuck, someone just kill me._ Dave thinks.

"You better talk with your kid," Chantal states with a threatening demeanour. "Stealing from us? We all work hard in here, we're honest people!"

"Chantal, it's okay."

"The hell it's okay, Kurt! Not even the people from the fifth floor mess with us, and that's because we don't bother our neighbours, so you better teach your son some respect. And if he wants to be a juvenile delinquent, then tell him to learn from the drug dealers from the floors above since they at least have codes with their neighbours."

The mother of the little thief looks like she wants to dig a hole in the floor and crawl into it, but she nods. "If there's anything I can help you with…"

Kurt shakes his head, and he doesn't even mention the stolen money. Probably because he knows as much as Dave that that money is gone for good. "You've done enough. Thank you so much for this."

The lady leaves and Kurt grabs his bag, emptying it of the sweaters, and puts the nebulizer inside instead. Apparently, Kurt is taking his most prized possessions with him and _sweaters_ happened to be those as well. Kurt's neighbour returns with the chain and the lock, handing a key to Kurt and then they all leave the apartment. They lock the door, and then they say goodbye to Kurt, all of them with sympathetic faces.

Dave has to admit that in spite of all the misery that he's just witnessed in Kurt's life, he likes that Kurt's neighbours are so caring towards him. Financially, they all seem to be in the same situation but at least they offer the help they can give. Even if what Kurt needs is money, it's nice that there are people that can offer those kind gestures to him.

They both walk down the stairs in silence, and _no_—no one has stolen Dave's car, which he almost forgot about. Kurt barely speaks to him the entire trip back to his place, and Dave starts anguishing, feeling caged at the helplessness he's experiencing right now.

Kurt's practically unresponsive; it's like he just moves by inertia when they get out from the car and take the elevator to Dave's apartment. It scares Dave; Kurt has to be upset, Dave knows he is, but the kind of passiveness that Kurt's displaying cannot be healthy.

"Talk to me," Dave says, as they hang their coats.

"There's nothing to talk about," Kurt states quietly, and walks away, to placing the backpack with the nebulizer on the couch.

"Kurt… C'mon, say something."

"Dave, just drop it."

"I'm not going to drop it, okay?"

"What do you want me to say?! What can I possibly say?!" Kurt suddenly snaps, turning around to face Dave.

"I don't know! Something, for Christ's sake! I can help you with-"

"Money? You want to help me with money? How many times are you going to fuck me tonight so you cover a new door?" Kurt enquires, sharply. "Or the locksmith work. Tell me, David, how many times are you going to fuck me so you can put enough money in my pocket to fix my life? You cannot help me, so, for once, get that ridiculous idea out of your head!"

Dave pinches the bridge of his nose, trying not to lose it because Kurt's upset and has every right to be upset. It's hard though.

"You know that's not what I mean," Dave grits between his teeth.

"And what do you mean? I know you're feeling _so_ sorry for me now that you had an all-inclusive tour of my miserable life, that your brain is probably working on strategies to-"

"Kurt, stop it!" Dave cuts him off, having enough of it. He walks closer to Kurt, until they're standing face to face and Dave tries to calm down. "I know you were saving money and I can help!"

"Don't you dare to go there! You know nothing!" Kurt growls at him, but then he chokes out a sob and finally tears are running down his cheeks.

Dave stays still, stunned, because they've been through a lot of shit ever since they got together; God knows they've put each other in terrible positions and have thrown the worst at each other. In spite of all that, Kurt has always shown himself to be strong and defiant; like none of the shit that life throws at him can really bring him down and God knows life only throws shit at Kurt. Chantal was right, it seems that the guy can catch a break.

But what was just a few tears in Kurt's eyes quickly turns to freaking _sobbing_ and Dave is so stunned and shocked that he can't put together two words.

Kurt wipes his tears with his fingers, but more keep on falling. He groans as he turns away from Dave.

"It's just so not fair!" Kurt yells, broken. "It was the _one _thing I let myself dream about and it was just a goddamned stove! I wasn't asking much, was I?"

With crying eyes, Kurt stares expectantly at Dave, and he swallows hard, not knowing what to say. He's hardly breathing and for some reason, he wants to cry himself.

"I've been saving money for months," Kurt continues, pacing around the living room. Dave just follows him with his gaze. "_Months _because I'm tired of New York's horrible winters! I thought that, I don't know, I could go through one winter without freezing, right? I just wanted to not be cold at home so maybe I wouldn't get so sick. For Christ's sake, that stove costs less than what I get from you after _one_ night, and I still couldn't get it! What the hell is wrong with me?!"

Dave says nothing. There's actually so much Dave wants to say, but it seems that Kurt is talking more to himself than him, and Dave lets him because it seems that Kurt needs vent. Fuck, Kurt has a lot to vent and it doesn't look like he does it often.

"I work my ass off, I spend every freaking day doing things I hate and all the money I make vanishes into this big black hole that seems never-ending, and for once I put my effort in something else. I'm not anywhere near from cancelling my debts and I won't just stop falling ill but... But if I tried with something smaller, it could happen… but I couldn't."

Kurt collapses on the couch, burying his face in his hands as he cries profusely. Dave immediately sits next to him, holding him close and, luckily, Kurt doesn't push him away; he just cries noisily on Dave's shoulder. Kurt wraps his arms around Dave's waist tightly, and his entire body shakes as he sobs. Dave just rocks Kurt gently, because there's nothing else he can do, and if there's something he can do, Dave doesn't know what that is. Kurt cries for several minutes, until little by little, he starts calming down.

"I'm so tired, Dave," Kurt whispers. "I'm so, _so_ tired."

"I know."

Dave sighs, defeated. Even if he doesn't know what to do with Kurt, he's still thinking about a million of possibilities to help Kurt out. He should have gone for the two bedroom apartment when he was choosing a place to buy, so that way at least he'd have a spare room for Kurt. Dave would like to Kurt to stay right there with him and never go back to that horrendous apartment, but he highly doubts that Kurt would just _move_ in with him. Dave's just his client.

"Let me at least get that stove for you," Dave offers. He can actually do that—and not just that Sears stove. He could buy the best stove in New York for Kurt.

"No."

"C'mon, Kurt. Let me do it; it's a big deal for you and I wouldn't mind."

"I get three hundred bucks from you, twice a week," Kurt tells him quietly. "I could've gone to Sears any morning after leaving this place and buy it. I could've done that, but I never did."

"Why?"

"That stove was the only thing I wanted, David. I didn't want to get it _that_ way; with _that_ money. God, I'm so pathetic."

"You're not."

"I'm not?" Kurt asks, looking up at Dave with sad eyes. "I used to dream in big: New York, Broadway, Vogue, Prada… Now my dream was as little as the actual size of that stove and it's gone. What does it say about me?"

Dave's not sure how to answer that so he thinks a little, working his mind up so he won't say anything to upset Kurt. Logically, it means that life changes and you change with it; it wouldn't make sense if Dave dealt with frustration at work, shoving people against the walls as he used to do in High School.

"It's not pathetic. You're life is not the one you had back in Lima."

Kurt breaks the embrace, letting out a long sigh. Then he wipes his tears, and sighs again. "It doesn't matter anymore," he states, his voice vacant of sorrow or sadness. "Our coffee is still here, we might as well reheat it? We still have a movie to pick."

Dave blinks, because suddenly Kurt looks completely unaffected and not like the guy who was crying his heart out just seconds before. Dave stares at the coffee table and indeed, their mugs of coffee are still there but this doesn't make any sense.

"What?"

"Coffee? Movie? Are you there, David?"

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Pretend like nothing happened; you're upset. You can't just bottle things up."

Kurt rolls his eyes, picking the mugs of coffee and walking to the kitchen. "I'm not pretending anything. Yes, I've got my savings stolen, my dreams have been crushed to dust. Too bad. I cried already, and I can believe I actually did that, so I'm sorry for that."

"You don't have to apologize for that, Jesus," Dave states, getting up and following Kurt to the kitchen. "I know you're strong and everything, but you can't just block it out like it's nothing."

"Look, I can't give myself the luxury to sit and cry," Kurt grits between his teeth. "If I did that for every little thing that goes wrong in my life, I wouldn't get up from bed and sadly, I have to move on because I have two jobs and a huge debt to pay."

Dave groans, since this is getting to his nerves. "This it's not a little thing! You've been saving money for months and you were just a few weeks from getting it!"

Kurt's eyes go suddenly glassy since Dave practically poked at his fresh wound, but Kurt swallows hard and puts the coffee on the microwave. "Yes, I know. But water under the bridge, David. As I said, I don't have time for this, and there's no point in crying over this as it's not going to solve anything."

"I know that crying won't get your savings back, but at least you'll-"

"David, please," Kurt tells him quietly, holding him by his arm and staring at him intensely. "Let it go because _I_ have to. If I let myself trip over this, I _am_ going to fall, and I'm afraid I won't be able to get back up. So I beg you, let it go."

Dave wants to say something about it, but he really can't. Instead, he just nods because even if he doesn't like it, he's not in Kurt's shoes and Dave doesn't want to upset Kurt anymore. Kurt has a lot to be upset about, and no matter how much Dave wants to change it, the truth is that Dave can't change it. Kurt's not going to cry over this any more than he did, apparently, and while Dave believes Kurt has every right to cry over everything, he sorts of admires Kurt's strong will.

Dave owns a house and a car; he has savings, a secure job and a freaking warm bed and even having all that, Dave's life's falling apart; he sees a shrink twice a week, takes tons of medication, drinks a lot when he's alone and eats as much as he vomits. That realization makes him feel stupid, and worthless and underserving. Kurt should have all that he has and Dave wishes there was a way to give Kurt all of that.

Still, Dave hugs Kurt and Kurt lets him and they don't break the embrace until the microwave beeps.

"C'mon," Kurt pecks Dave on lips and gives him a small smile. Dave's heart melts. "We still haven't picked the movie."

They end up going for the third part of The Avengers but not even half-way through the movie, in spite of the loud noises of explosions, Dave finds Kurt completely asleep. At first Dave believed that Kurt was resting his head on his shoulder as a caring gesture, but it wasn't until Dave hear Kurt's soft whistling that he realized he was asleep.

Dave lets him. The night has been stressful enough for Kurt, so Dave finishes watching the movie and by then Kurt's sleeping heavily. Dave carefully lays Kurt on the couch, while he takes his shoes and socks and then heads to the bedroom to prepare the bed and get in his sleeping clothes. Once he's ready, he returns to the living room and picks Kurt on bridal style, taking him to bed.

Kurt wakes up drowsily when Dave's taking his jeans, moving his hips upwards to let Dave slide his pants off. "I'm sorry," Kurt mumbles. "Just give me two minutes."

"Jesus, Kurt, I'm not going to fuck you," Dave whispers, not wanting to wake Kurt the more. "Just get off from these so you're more comfortable."

Luckily, Kurt doesn't say much and lets Dave undress him to his underwear and undershirt.

"I'm not supposed to sleep," Kurt mutters, cuddling next to Dave once that they're both under the covers.

"Night's not over. Just rest a bit, and I'll do the same."

And it's not like he's declining having sex with Kurt, since Dave can never get tired of it but he certainly won't mind if they don't fuck _once_. It's kind of mandatory since Kurt's a prostitute that Dave's paying to fuck, but sometimes Dave believes he would like just to _sleep_ together without sex involved.

It's hard to catch any sleep; the images of Kurt's house are still haunting him. Tonight, Dave found that Kurt lives in a cold house, where there are drug dealers and thieves and that his most treasured possessions are his nebulizer and his sweaters.

This is all kinds of wrong, and Dave stays awake trying to figure out _something, _anything that can make Kurt better. The first thing that Dave wants is for Kurt to stop whoring himself and to move out of that place, but how can Dave achieve that? He can't kidnap Kurt and lock him in his apartment. Fuck, he'd gladly give his entire salary to Kurt, but the only way to do that is to make Kurt spend more than two nights a week. Kurt wouldn't accept that since he's certainly not going to miss his work at The VIP. He can't offer Kurt to move in with him either; even if Dave would love to have Kurt around all the time, he doesn't think that Kurt would like to be around him so much, no matter how comfortable his apartment is.

In addition, Dave's eating problems are getting worse. He learned how to handle the meals he has with Kurt without purging, but how can he deal with that if he has Kurt with him every day? He would go insane; no matter how much he tries not to fall into a new binge. Lately it's happening every second night and having to hide from Kurt would be too much pressure.

He would try to, but deep down he knew Kurt wouldn't just move with him.

Overwhelmed with the helplessness he's feeling, he grows tired. Kurt's already back to sleep by the time that Dave turns off the lights so he decides to follow Kurt's example.

* * *

><p>In the morning, while Dave gets dressed to go to work, he can't take his eyes off Kurt's sleeping figure. He's sleeping on his side of the bed; Dave noticed a couple of mornings ago how Kurt always rolls to his side of the bed every time he gets up. It kind of reminds him of cats—how they usually move over to where someone was laying or sitting, just to soak up the heat left in the empty space.<p>

It's as endearing as it's sad.

Dave wishes he could skip work and stay with Kurt, though, not only because it looks very inviting but also because he's tired as hell. In addition, it's going to be a very busy day at work.

But, overall, he's tired. Last night, Dave naively thought that Kurt would sleep through the night after all the stress the robbery caused to him, but he was very wrong.

Dave was woken up by a very naked and demanding Kurt, straddling him and things escalated from there. It's not that he doesn't like to have sex with Kurt, but the urgent need that Kurt has to _justify_ his presence upsets him. Dave understands though; if wouldn't hire a plumber just to give him money for fixing nothing.

But no matter how much he loves fucking Kurt, he doesn't_ need_ sex, he just wants Kurt around. Kurt already knows how pathetic he is, so Dave sometimes considers telling Kurt that he just wants to pay for his time and not necessarily to have sex, but he's aware that Kurt wouldn't take any money from him if they don't have sex.

So it's pretty much a dead end.

And they had sex for hours, so Dave is exhausted. Kurt was particularly more demanding than usual; Dave guessed Kurt was just releasing his frustrations through sex. Dave's back itches, since Kurt scratched him all over; not that he minds though.

He's finishing buttoning up his shirt when he hears Kurt stirring in bed. Kurt waking up before Dave leaves has become a habit during their last few encounters and today it's seems it won't be any different.

"Morning," Kurt greets sleepily, with a tender smile on his face.

Dave walks closer, bending over to kiss Kurt's lips. "Morning, gorgeous. Sleep well?"

"Um hum."

Nothing happens after that, as usual. Dave finishes dressing while Kurt just watches him, all wrapped up with covers even if the heat is on. Dave's not sure if Kurt's actually cold or if it's just a quirk. The heating is constantly on 74° whenever Kurt's at his place, and Dave's always hot but when he sees Kurt seeking warmness Dave wonders if he should turn it up.

Dave gets his coat and his bag and steps closer to Kurt, kissing him again. "I'll get going, okay? I left cupcakes on the counter for breakfast."

Kurt smiles lazily and Dave's stomach flips. "I can have just coffee, you know?"

"Nonsense. Call me if you need anything, okay? For the door or-"

"It's fine, Dave."

"Promise me you're going to call," Dave states, serious now.

"Promise. Have a good day at work," Kurt says, pecking on his lips.

"You too."

Reluctantly, Dave leaves wondering how expensive a new door is and what it would cost to have a locksmith replace it; it surely can't be something cheap. He walks out of his house, sad, because something tells him that despite Kurt promising to call him if he needed something, Dave knows Kurt won't.

The powerlessness is killing him. He can never catch a break with Kurt.


	14. Chapter 13

**Title:** About trees and empty forests.**  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> **Dave Karofsky/Kurt Hummel.**  
><strong>Rating: <strong>**Nc17.**  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> **Strip and lap dances. Misunderstood prostitution. Bulimia. Depression.**  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> **Season One and Two.**  
><strong>Beta:<strong> **Ella. Thanks for everything, girl! You're the best beta anyone can ask for!**  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> **119oo this chapter.**  
><strong>Genre:<strong> **Romance/Angst/Drama.**  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> **Pfht, if I owned Glee, Blaine wouldn't be on it.**  
><strong>Summary:<strong> **It's been five years since Kurt Hummel and Dave Karofsky left Lima, following different paths. Now their lives are far from being what they dreamed for themselves. But then one night they meet again, in an unexpected way and in an unexpected place and everything changes.**  
><strong>AN:** **I started plotting this fic way before the Prom episode. So in this fic, Karofsky hasn't apologized yet.  
><strong>AN: **IMPORTANT NOTE! I apologize in advance. This is the last chapter my beta can beta, so please enjoy this last one! The next ones won't have a beta and will be surely filled with grammar horror so... I'm sorry for that. Enjoy!**  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 13<strong>

It's Tuesday morning and Kurt wakes feeling lazy and a bit disappointed when he notices Dave is long gone and he didn't have the chance to say goodbye. Kurt chuckles, annoyed, but he snuggles under the covers, loving the warmth. Every new morning he wakes up in Dave's bed, it always takes a bit longer until he decides to get up. It's just an amazing bed, and even if he doesn't get too much sleep when he stays with Dave, considering how much sex they have, Kurt always wakes up very well rested.

At ten, Kurt decides to stop lazing around and get up for once. He heads to the bathroom to brush his teeth (Dave got him his own tooth brush a couple of weeks ago), showers, and after getting dressed, he goes to the kitchen.

Kurt rolls his eyes when he finds a paper bag with two big cinnamon buns on the counter, because it seems Dave will never let him have a breakfast that doesn't include some tasty pastry to go with his coffee. Kurt doesn't get mad anymore, though; if anything, he's getting used to it. Kurt desperately needs to hold onto anything that makes him feel good, since he's still trying to get over the robbery, even if he does his best not to think about that. With Dave, Kurt can feel somewhat happy twice a week and it's a huge thing for him. Also, it had been a great idea to stop being so nosy and start being more caring towards Dave, because it's been weeks since they had any kind of argument.

Maybe he's imagining things, but he believes his new approach is helping Dave as well. Kurt hasn't found Dave sitting alone in the darkness again, and Dave seems more relaxed and open. That thought makes him smile.

Half an hour later, Kurt's watching one of the episodes of RuPaul's Drag Race that Dave TiVo'd for him and he gets why Dave likes this show so much because, really, it's very addicting. They watched three episodes last night, and Kurt got completely hooked. His coffee is long gone and so is one of the cinnamon buns; Kurt decides to save the second one for later in the day. He'll take it home, though, because if he leaves it there Dave might torture himself trying to resist the sweet treat, which would be bad; or torture himself trying to resist the temptation, then eat it, then throw it up, which would be even worse.

The ringing of his phone startles him, but he hurries to get it from his jacket before he misses the call. Kurt's surprised when he sees on the screen that Dave's the one calling.

"Hello?"

"Kurt, hi," Dave greets, sounding hurried or busy, Kurt can't really tell. "Are you still at home? Please, tell me you're home," he pleads, desperate, before Kurt can answer.

Kurt blushes. _At home. _It's a silent agreement that he can stay in Dave's apartment as long as he wants. God, Kurt even has a set of keys now, because last week Dave was coming home late from work and decided giving Kurt a spare set was easier than asking the manager to let him in. It's obvious that Kurt takes baths and has breakfast at Dave's. The coffee and pastries are gone when Dave comes back from work, and Dave also gets new bathing products when they run out. Secretly, Kurt sometimes keeps his MetFood uniform in his backpack and stays at Dave's until his shift starts, without even stopping by his own apartment. So yes, they both know that Kurt gets comfortable here when Dave's gone, but this is not home and Kurt's embarrassed to admit to Dave that it's almost eleven and he's still at his place.

"Erm, yes. I was just about to leave-"

"No, no, this is great, I need to ask you a big favor."

Kurt quickly forgets about his embarrassment, since apparently Dave needs his help and it's something that involves Kurt still being in his apartment.

"Yes, of course."

"Can you go to my room, and check on the desk," Dave commands. "You know, with all the papers on it?" Kurt follows his instructions.

Dave's desk is a big mess. It was the first thing Kurt noticed yesterday. Dave's house is always in order so the unruly pile of papers really stood out. Kurt knows that's because he's been working on some project for the past week and the entire weekend. It's the same reason Dave was coming home late last week.

"I'm standing at the desk right now."

"Look around. Tell me there's a little _thing_ that looks like a flash drive somewhere," Dave almost begs and Kurt starts carefully shifting the massive piles of paper until he finds one.

"Is it blue? It has a few numbers…" Kurt asks, holding it on his hand and he instantly hears Dave sighing loudly.

"Oh, thank god!" Dave groans, relieved. "I was going insane, looking for it everywhere and I was beginning to think I'd lost it. Okay, now I need an even bigger favor."

"Sure. Anything you need."

"Can you take a cab and bring it to me? The meeting's going to start soon and I won't make it home and back in time, and the team will literally skin me alive if we don't present those reports. I swear I'll make it up for you."

"I can do that, it's not a problem. Text me the address, I'll head downstairs right now. Don't you worry," Kurt reassures him since Dave really sounds desperate.

"Okay. I'll wait outside for you. Thank you so much for this."

After hanging up, Kurt puts the little flash drive in his pocket and hurries to get his backpack, glad that he can help Dave. Last night Dave had explained to him all about these reports he's been working on and Kurt didn't understand half of what he said but he did get that this presentation today was something big.

It's not until he's on the street, stopping a taxi, that he realizes he's wearing Dave's cardigan instead of his jacket, which is still in Dave's apartment. Kurt decides to keep going, not only because he's in a hurry but also because he quickly notices that in spite of it being a chilly morning, he is for once not cold. And damn, the cardigan is oversized but it looks good on him. It's a bit disheartening that Dave's cardigan keeps him warmer than his own jacket, though.

Kurt gives the driver the address, asking him to take the quickest route. Luckily, traffic isn't too bad and Kurt's in the Financial District within fifteen minutes. As they get closer to Dave's office, he spots Dave on the street, looking edible as usual in his expensive suit, at the entrance of this incredibly tall and fancy building. Actually, most of the buildings are tall and fancy in Manhattan, but the streets are narrower in the Financial District so they look more imposing here. Kurt had forgotten about that, since he hasn't set foot in this neighborhood for years.

Dave approaches the taxi and pays the driver as Kurt gets out of the car.

"Hey," Kurt greets, and he's glad to see Dave since he missed him this morning.

"Hi, doll," Dave replies, throwing his arms around Kurt's waist, pulling him close to kiss him. "Sorry about all this. I hope I'm not making you late for work or something."

For a second, Kurt's a little thrown off by Dave's public display of affection. Kurt still remembers Dave being an acute closet case back in high school, but now he's hugging and kissing another man in the middle of the street in broad daylight, showing not even a glimpse of fear or embarrassment.

Kurt feels proud of Dave and happy all of sudden at that realization, so he smiles tenderly. "I don't have to work today, so it's fine. And I'm glad I can help. Still, should I slap you for keeping a very important report on a flash drive?"

Dave laughs a little. "Actually, it's not a flash drive, it's a security token. American Express works with bank accounts and loads of highly confidential stuff. We don't have passwords. That little thing throws a new access code to the network every two minutes, and since I didn't have it I couldn't open my freaking files. They could issue me a new one, but it's a lot of paper work and I wouldn't have it until tomorrow at the earliest, if I'm luckily, so…"

Kurt takes it out of his pocket and hands it to Dave. "Hope I made it on time."

"You just saved my life. The guys must be coming back, they went out for coffee and as soon as they get back we're… Is that my cardigan?"

Kurt blushes. "It is. I practically ran out of your apartment and I didn't realize I was still wearing it."

"I don't mind. I always say it looks better on you than on me."

Kurt feels the soft wool with the tip of his fingers. "It's a great piece of clothing; the knitting is marvelous. I can't imagine anyone looking bad in this," he says, trying for modesty, even though he knows he's rocking the cardigan.

They're interrupted by someone whistling at them; they both turn around and Kurt spots three men wearing suits, holding coffees and walking towards them. Kurt feels suddenly panicked, as though he were back in high school about to get bullied, which is kind of ridiculous since it's his former bully's arm around his waist right now. He catches Dave rolling his eyes.

"Please just ignore them," Dave mutters, not looking really upset about this.

"Well, well, what do we have in here?" One of them says when they finally approach.

"Guys, don't embarrass me, okay?" Dave tells them.

"Aren't you going to introduce us?"

The three of them are staring at Kurt with knowing smiles, and Kurt feels a little uncomfortable. He can't see malice in them, but still they're looking at him as if he were some sort of big circus attraction.

"Kurt, these are-"

"Woah, _you're_ Kurt?" The younger of them cuts Dave off. Then he nods, like he's impressed. "Well done, man!" He nudges Dave.

Kurt can't help laughing when he sees Dave blush.

"Shut up, Paul. Kurt, this is Paul, Charlie and Doug," Dave finally introduces them to Kurt, and Kurt nods to all of them. "They're on my team."

"Good morning, gentleman," Kurt greets politely. For some reason, he has the sudden urge to be liked by Dave's co-workers.

Paul seems to be in his mid-thirties, while Doug and Charlie look like they're reaching or passing their mid-forties. Dave has mentioned before that he's the youngest one. For the second time in the last three minutes, Kurt feels suddenly proud of Dave. Now that Kurt can actually see it, Dave really does look very young among these men. Dave is only twenty-three and yet he's gotten so far, working for a huge company and in a serious position, a place that other people might have taken years to reach. Dave must be really good at what he does, even if he claims not to like it. In addition, it seems that Dave's also well-liked by his co-workers and God, who could hate Dave? Ever since they reconnected, Kurt has to say that Dave's a really wonderful guy and he's glad that other people can see it.

Kurt only wishes Dave could see that about himself.

"Guess my movie recommendations weren't so bad after all," Paul states playfully, winking at Dave; Dave rolls his eyes. "They got you a hot boyfriend, Karofsky."

"Actually, that Mark Wahlberg movie was terrible," Kurt tells him, since Dave's too busy blushing to death. "All Dave got out of that was a long discussion with me about why any producer decides it's a good idea to make a movie about robots and cowboys."

"Paul here keeps insisting it's best movie in the world," Doug chuckles. "But my wife agrees with you. She almost made me sleep on the couch for wasting three hours of her life like that_._"

Kurt laughs, since he has forgotten the movie was so long; actually, the entire thing was quite forgettable.

"Hey, but you can't tell me you didn't enjoy all the eye-candy that is Mark Wahlberg."

"Paul…" Dave warns.

"I was too busy counting all the plot holes," Kurt retorts. "It was so ridiculous that at some point we wondered if it was on purpose."

"The boy's got taste," Charlie muses. "Anyway, it's nice to meet you, Kurt. Dave's mentioned you, but we didn't know you were boyfriends. Well done," he says, patting Dave's shoulder. "It was kind of sad, him being the only bachelor among us."

"You should have seen Paul, all 'Hey, look! Dave's got a man!'" Doug says, mimicking Paul's apparent reaction and Kurt laughs again.

"Guys…"

"Our little Davey is growing up!"

"Guys, please," Dave begs, red as a tomato. "Just go upstairs and stop embarrassing me. The others are waiting and I'll meet you in a minute."

"Yeah, we'll leave you two love-birds," Paul winks at Dave one last time. "Nice to meet you, Kurt."

"My pleasure."

When they're alone, Dave apologizes but Kurt just laughs. "No really, I'm sorry about that."

"They're nice. I'm glad you work with such friendly and accepting people; they could hate you for being gay, and even more for actually showing it in public. But you should get going as well, I don't want to hold you up from your meeting."

Dave smiles and kisses him. "Thanks again. I'll see you tomorrow, right? I'd love to take you out for lunch though, now that you're here. Shame about this stupid meeting."

Kurt looks at Dave, completely puzzled. "Really, Dave? And we'd eat at different tables so I don't have to watch you?" he teases.

"Well, no. I'd … I'd just have a coffee and... _oh_, that reminds me, do you want free Starbucks?"

"I've already have breakfast and I don't want you to give me any money." Dave rolls his eyes, and Kurt sees him taking out his wallet. "Dave, I don't need money!"

"It's not money; here, take this," Dave hands him a card and Kurt looks at it suspiciously. "It's a gift card for fifty bucks. AmEx gives them out sometimes as rewards for good performance. I completely forgot about this one until they gave each guy on my team another one last week for reaching our monthly goal."

Kurt presses his lips together, debating whether to accept Dave's gift or not. It never stops being awkward having Dave shower him with treats. However, Kurt usually doesn't have to deal with _taking_ those treats, since the delicious dinners are there when Kurt arrives at Dave's. The coffee machine was there as well, and so were all the grooming and bathing products. It's been a long while since the last time Dave actually handed him the three hundred bucks for his… well, _services_. Now he just leaves the money on the kitchen table. This screams charity, but at the same time, the prospect of having Starbucks without any worry about his pocket is overwhelming.

"C'mon, Kurt. I have one already, and it doesn't cost me a thing. I'm probably not even going to use this one."

With hesitant hands, Kurt takes the card. "This is… kind of a lot. Are you sure?"

"Positive. I like Starbucks just fine, but there're only so many frappuccinos I can drink."

"Well, then that being the case… Thank you," Kurt whispers, trying not to grin too widely. "Thank you so much."

People might say that Starbucks is overrated, but Kurt loves it anyway and it's been years since the last time he gave himself the luxury of spending five bucks on a coffee.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Dave kisses Kurt one last time. "Take care, okay?"

"You, too. And good luck with that meeting."

"Thanks, and thanks for this," Dave waves the security token, and after kissing Kurt one last time, he walks back into the building.

Kurt stays there, watching Dave until he disappears behind the doors; after he loses Dave from sight, Kurt turns around and starts walking away. There's a big smile on his face, and he feels inexplicably content. It was nice to meet Dave's colleagues and to see Dave at his workplace, even if Kurt can't explain why that's so gratifying.

Kurt promenades a little on the streets of Manhattan looking for a Starbucks. Even though he had breakfast already, he _has_ to find one, being now able to actually splurged on their outrageously overpriced drinks and snacks.

Kurt grins when he spots the cafe close to his subway station and walks towards it, feeling like he owns the world.

There's a fifty dollar gift card in his pocket, and to Kurt it's like having a freaking Visa Gold and money enough to pay it off, so he walks into Starbucks with a silly superior air. Yet his penniless side betrays him, because even if he won't be paying for anything, he quickly starts looking at the prices, trying to pick what's cheapest. Kurt can't help it; the habit is already too deeply engrained. He wants to make this gift card last, so instead of ordering a Venti, he goes for a Tall.

When he pays for his drink, Kurt smiles smugly at the barista because he has a _fifty dollar gift card_, excuse you, and it almost feels like he's a VIP guest in an exclusive club. Kurt picks a small table at one corner, not wanting to be close to the window since he doesn't like the view. Now that he's poor, he feels out-of-place among wealthy people; it's not like the place is full of rich people, but it's still the Financial District and all Kurt can see are expensive suits and briefcases, not to mention shoes that could pay for more than one month of his rent. Kurt doesn't have anything against that, but he's still not comfortable.

Kurt takes a sip on his coffee and it tastes as good as he remembers; a sense of warmth creeps into his bones, from both the hot coffee and the nice familiarity that it provides. It's not as great as the Nesspresso, but it's still delicious.

"Oh, my God! Kurt?"

Kurt looks up and his blood runs cold when his eyes meet _Blaine's._ He stays very still for a second, holding his breath. But then he smiles, trying to be polite and hiding all the bad things he's suddenly feeling. Eight million people and one-hundred and twenty-nine Starbucks in New York City and all Kurt can think is 'Why, God? Why?'

"Blaine! Wh-what... a surprise," Kurt stutters, overwhelmed and nervous.

Blaine smiles widely, bending over and surprising Kurt with a tight hug that Kurt returns awkwardly .

"Are you busy? May I?" Blaine asks, pointing at the empty seat.

"Not at all, please sit. How've you been? It's been years since I last saw you."

He doesn't really want to catch up with Blaine, but Kurt is trying to be polite even if he just wants to run away. He's nervous, very nervous, but does his best to act the way he used to be. Blaine looks… the same as he's always looked. His hair is a bit longer, his clothing is now more casual and mature but it looks expensive, so Kurt assumes Blaine's doing well. Kurt realizes he really needs to stop thinking about how much other people's clothing costs.

"I've been great, but you, sir, you've been completely missing! You graduated from McKinley and then you just disappeared; the last thing I heard was that you came here, in spite of not getting into NYADA. So you still live in New York, I assume?"

Kurt narrows his eyes, but shows a smile. A fake one he perfected a long time ago. "I went to Parsons."

"That's so great! You're thing has always been fashion, I've bet you're doing great."

Kurt doesn't really want to talk about himself; this is worst than when he met Dave for the first time. He doesn't hold any grudge against Blaine; they were young when they dated and they spent half-a-year in Glee club together even after Blaine started openly dating Sebastian, so Kurt got over that long ago.

But back in Lima, Blaine knew Kurt in a way that Dave didn't. They shared dreams and expectations about the future; Blaine, like everyone else in the Glee club, knew what Kurt's goals were and how much talent and potential he had to achieve those goals. So for obvious reasons, the last thing Kurt wants is Blaine getting to know about his present.

If Blaine learns the truth in this coffee shop, it's going to be hundreds of times more humiliating than Dave finding him stripping on stage at The VIP.

"What about you?" Kurt asks, faking excitement. He just wants to make this conversation about Blaine; Blaine likes attention, Kurt learned that the hard way, but now he can use it to deflect attention from himself.

"I got into NYADA, with Rachel. I finished but Rachel dropped out after sophomore year."

Kurt blinks, perplexed. "I'm sorry?"

He'd been in touch with Rachel briefly when they both moved to New York after graduation, but they quickly grew apart, going to separate schools and both of them busy trying to start their respective careers.

But apparently Blaine is still in touch with Rachel, and God forbid if Rachel gets to know what's going on with his life. He can't believe that Rachel dropped out of NYADA, though.

"You know how NYADA is…"

"I don't, actually."

Blaine shrugs, looking slightly uncomfortable. "Well, it's… discouraging? Yes, Rachel is really amazing and I know I am, as well; we had this unique talent in Lima. But it's like, amazing for Lima but not so much for New York, you know? You get into NYADA and everyone is as good as or better than you and, well, it's hard to stand out. Everyone's so talented…"

"Welcome to the real world," Kurt mutters, not wanting to be bitter but Kurt knows from his own experience how dreams can fall apart in a matter of seconds.

"I guess. But she's doing great now in LA. Well, you know."

"She's in LA?" Kurt inquires, surprised and relieved. That's one less person from his past he could run into in New York.

Blaine frowns, staring at Kurt with a funny face. "She's on TV, haven't you seen her?"

Kurt's starting to feel like he lives in a box. "I don't watch TV."

"Lord, Kurt, are you for real? She's part of the cast of Standing Crowds; she has a small part but she's a regular. Second season just premiered!"

Kurt knows that show exists, some of his coworkers at The VIP watch it because the guys on the show are – according to them - ridiculously hot. Kurt believes the show is about lawyers or student lawyers, a sort of Grey's Anatomy of law, but that's about it. He's happy for Rachel, though, even if it's unexpected.

"So from Broadway star to Hollywood star."

"She sees this as a detour. It's hard to compete against everyone on Broadway, especially being new in the business. But you've seen how it's easier for people from TV or movies to get to Broadway, so when she auditioned and actually got the role, she dropped out of school. Gosh, Kurt, why aren't you on Facebook? Catching up would be much easier," Blaine laughs good humoredly, not knowing that Kurt very deliberately deleted any piece of social network that could inform about his existence in the world. "Her dream is still to be on the stage, and maybe with a little popularity…"

It makes sense to Kurt, so he nods. "What about you?"

"Well, you're looking at Spiderman's Flash Thompson," Blaine states proudly and Kurt smiles, happy for him.

He didn't know the Spiderman musical was still running, but honestly, Kurt has no idea what's on Broadway nowadays. Yet Blaine made it to Broadway and that's not a small accomplishment at all.

"Woah, that's so amazing! Congratulations!"

Blaine presses a tight smile, shrugging in _faux_ modesty. Kurt remembers that gesture very well. "I just started last month. It's an entirely new cast, but so far it's amazing. It's a shame I don't have any solos, but being on stage, it's just... a dream come true, you know?"

Kurt no longer believes that dream come true, but still he nods, humoring Blaine. "Yeah."

"You should totally come see the show."

Kurt laughs on the inside but remains impassive on the outside. Paying for Broadway tickets - it's so out of his reach that it's ridiculously hilarious. If he had a hundred bucks to spare… first he would cry for joy, that's for sure, and honestly, he doesn't even know what he'd do if he had so much money to spare. He knows, though, that he wouldn't spend it on a musical, let alone one that got such awful reviews, no matter how much he appreciates Blaine. But Kurt can't say that so…

"That would be nice."

"No, seriously. My treat; I can get you the best seats."

"I'm sure you can, now that you rub shoulders with Broadway and Hollywood stars."

Blaine blushes, pressing his lips together. "Well, my boyfriend is kind of a Broadway producer so…"

"Kind of?"

"He's an associate producer, but he can definitely get tickets for you."

"So I take it things with Sebastian Smythe didn't prosper? Unless he's became a Broadway producer?"

Blaine chuckles uncomfortably. "I guess I never apologized for that," he mutters, looking embarrassed.

Kurt gives Blaine a sympathetic smile; the last thing he wants is Blaine thinking he holds some kind of grudge. Yes, Blaine cheating on him was a despicable thing to do, and it left Kurt with all kinds of sexual insecurities, but it seems like a lifetime ago, and anyway Francis' betrayal – sleeping around and stealing his job while he was in the _hospital_ – put Blaine's actions in perspective.

"It's okay, Blaine. It was a long, long time ago. You don't have to worry about that."

"Yeah, we were young and stupid and well… but no, he's not Sebastian. That didn't last at all; we broke up after a couple of months."

Then Blaine starts telling him about his life and Kurt listens with his best interested face, but he grows uncomfortable very quickly. Kurt learns that Blaine just moved into his boyfriend's apartment in Manhattan, that rehearsals are annoying, that everyone in the cast knows the show itself isn't great but being on stage, even in a bad musical, can lead to new and better things. Blaine tells Kurt that he was recently in LA visiting Rachel – Kurt picks up that they're very close friends - and he met the whole cast of Standing Crowds and they went together to these incredible promotional parties.

He goes on and on about great parties and awesome people with awesome clothing, cars and friends, and Kurt feels like Blaine is talking in a complete different language. Kurt smiles and nods politely at everything Blaine says, careful to add some 'uh-huh's and 'ah's at the right moments.

There's no way Blaine is trying to make Kurt feel small on purpose, since little knows Blaine that this is the first time Kurt's set foot in Starbucks in over two years, not because he doesn't like it but because he can't pay for the coffee, or that he still carries his nebulizer in his backpack everywhere he goes since after the robbery the idea of losing his nebulizer terrifies him, or that he can't afford to replace the broken lock on his apartment door so he's still using a chain borrowed from his neighbor.

So when Blaine complains about the food that was served on his first class flight from LA to New York, Kurt has a hard time following him.

As the conversation goes on, or better to say, Blaine's monologue flows, Kurt looks down at his coffee that's almost untouched and cold and he's not feeling so great about it anymore. He doesn't own a Visa Gold after all; it was just a gift card – _someone else's_ gift card - and he's inevitably embarrassed about the ridiculous excitement he was feeling when he walked into the cafe.

Still, things are good because at least Blaine is not asking Kurt about his life, until of course, Blaine asks.

"God, I cannot stop talking about myself! Tell me about you!" Blaine exclaims, excited. "It's been years and honestly, Rachel and I always wonder about you."

Kurt laughs nervously and tries to think quickly. He's almost sure that his father doesn't share news about him with anyone in Lima. Otherwise, Blaine – and Rachel – would know about Kurt's huge success and incredibly high style life in New York, and that a couple of years ago he'd been so sick that he almost died. Or maybe his father did tell folks in Lima, but it never reached Blaine and Rachel's ears. Or maybe they don't wonder about him at all, and Blaine is just being polite.

So Kurt is torn, not knowing what to say.

"I'm good," Kurt replies vaguely, forcing a smile.

Blaine smiles back, buying it. Kurt feels somewhat achieved, he's still a damn fine actor. "What brings you to the Financial District? You live nearby? Work?"

"Oh, no, not at all. I was just doing some errands for my...um..."

Kurt stops himself before saying whatever he was going to say. His _what_, exactly? Kurt doesn't even know and he's not sure if he wants to find out about what that almost Freudian slip had in store for him.

"Boyfriend?" Blaine teasingly fills in the blank.

"Yeah," Kurt lies, quickly resolving that it's easier to say 'boyfriend' than – god forbid - 'client.' or even mention Dave Karofsky altogether. Blaine would be very interested to know how he reconnected with his former bully.

"That's good. So he's the one living here?"

"Yes, he works nearby, actually; for American Express. He just forgot some stuff at home he needed for a meeting and I brought it to him."

"Aw… You're such a good boyfriend," Blaine says playfully.

"What can I say?" Kurt plays along.

It's as uncomfortable as it is easy to talk about Dave as if he were his boyfriend, but at the same time it's convenient because Kurt doesn't have to make up lies on the spot.

"And how's work? What do you do now? I bet you did great with your knowledge of fashion and a degree from Parsons."

Even if it's nice Blaine thinks that, it leaves Kurt speechless. Considering how briefly he was in that world, Kurt did go far with Parsons and fashion, but that was long ago. He's not sure how to lie to Blaine, though. His dad understands less than half the things Kurt lies about so it's quite easy to make up a lot of ridiculous stories. But Blaine seems to know what a successful lifestyle includes – hanging out with the right people and going to the right parties and knowing what looks good on your resume.

It's silly, but after hearing Blaine tell about his incredibly successful life, Kurt has the urge to say something impressive about himself. Usually, there's no one to impress, since the people Kurt rubs shoulders with are in the same situation as he - they're either poor, sort of poor, or strippers. But Blaine became a Broadway performer, in spite of the lack of solos, and Rachel is on freaking TV, so Kurt _has_ to say something good about himself.

"I worked for Prada for a while," Kurt muses quietly.

"God, that's so awesome! Wait until Rachel hears about that, she'll be demanding discounts."

"_Worked. _Past tense. I'm not working in fashion right now."

Blaine frowns. "That's too bad. Why did you quit? Bad salary? I've heard in the fashion industry they kind of exploit everyone."

Kurt actually laughs because he remembers his days at Prada and you have to expect to be exploited when you're just starting to build your career.

"I just… got sick, and had to quit."

"Oh… Well, health comes first, right? Are you okay now? I did notice you look different," Blaine states, sounding concerned and Kurt can't say that didn't hurt. "I just didn't want to pry."

Kurt frowns, much taken aback. "How do I look?"

"I don't know, different. You're super skinny, and I don't think I've ever seen you in public without perfectly coiffed hair. I was actually wondering if you were down with a cold or something."

Kurt nods, pressing his lips together. Blaine's not being particularly mean, he's just simply pointing out what he sees, and for some reason, Kurt thinks about Dave. To everyone who knows sickly pauper Kurt, he looks the same as he has always looked. But Blaine and Dave know different, and are able to _compare_. He wonders what Dave sees when he looks at him.

"I'm getting better," Kurt replies shortly, not feeling in the mood to share much information about this.

Thankfully, Blaine gets the hint. "Okay… But it's nothing serious, right?"

Kurt shakes his head, "I'm much better now," he says firmly, trying to head off more questions.

"Your boyfriend better be taking care of you," Blaine offers bouncily, easing the seriousness that the conversation had gained.

Kurt laughs slightly, as several mental pictures of Dave pampering him come to his head and it makes him smile genuinely. Dave is really good to him; as much as Kurt hates it, it's nice to have someone taking care of you. Ever since he almost died from pneumonia, he's always been on his own, but now Dave's there, keeping him warm, well-fed and properly rested at least twice a week.

"He treats me like I'm going to break sometimes; it gets kind of annoying but… He's really incredible."

"You totally deserve that. I'm happy for you. Oh, and I love your outfit by the way; I guess you may quit working in fashion but you'll always be a fashionista."

If Kurt had a drink in his mouth, he would be spitting it out with a laugh.

"My outfit?" What outfit?

"Yeah, your clothes look great."

"Oh, this is nothing," Kurt finally says, laughing because it's really funny. He's wearing Dave's cardigan, with a pair of women jeans since they were the only ones he found at the Salvation Army that fit, and his shoes are actually Gucci but they're like three years old and look their age.

"You're so modest. But I've seen around that oversized knitwear is in this winter and that's a great cardigan."

Kurt presses his lips together. He's completely clueless about the latest trend in fashion, and this must be the first time in years that he's being fashion forward.

"Thanks."

"Blaine leans a little forward and touches the knitwear admiringly, and Kurt can't blame him since indeed it looks as beautiful as it feels. "What is it? Marc Jacobs? McQueen?"

"I… I don't know actually."

"Kurt Hummel doesn't know what designer his clothes are? Who are you and what having you done with my old friend?"

Kurt swallows hard, forcing a laugh. "It's my boyfriend's_, _actually, not mine."

He immediately frowns after saying that. Blaine said 'boyfriend' and Kurt played along. But to hear himself using that word, out loud, to refer to Dave makes Kurt's stomach flip.

"Oh, you're wearing his clothes! How cute is that? And of course, you'd date a fashionista as well."

Kurt laughs a little. "He doesn't care much about fashion. He barely knows who Marc Jacobs and Alexander McQueen are. I think he just bought it because it fit him, but it looks good on me so..."

He catches Blaine surprised, staring closely at his cardigan and then Blaine snorts. "Really? He's a big guy, huh?"

"He's not fat!" Kurt snaps before he can even register what he's saying, but seriously, Blaine's words just rubbed him the wrong way. The very wrong way. God, he never knew that he was so sensitive about Dave's weight, but of course, it's not like Kurt ever talks about it.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that to sound offensive."

Kurt sighs. "No, it's fine, I'm the one who's sorry. It's just… he has all these stupid ideas about being fat and it drives me crazy," he explains, upset for real, suddenly remembering all the horrible things Dave does to himself because of his weight. "Not that being fat is wrong, but he's not and still thinks he is and he gets upset about it. He's just big built."

"Jock type?" Blaine inquires, nodding knowingly.

"Yes."

"Nice."

Right at that moment, Blaine's cellphone rings and it turns out to be a text from his boyfriend, saying that he's ready to go. Apparently, Blaine was just killing time at the Starbucks while his boyfriend did some errands in the neighborhood.

"I have to get going, but hey, give me your number so we can meet again! And Rachel! She'll be ecstatic when I tell her about you."

Kurt pretends not to have his phone with him, in order not to show his old and broken iPhone 5 to Blaine, who is flashing what surely must be the latest model. Against his good judgment, Kurt gives him the correct phone number and when he finishes he wonders why he even did that.

They exchange smiles, hugs and goodbyes, but then Kurt's left alone with his cold coffee and a load of things in his head that start to get to him. The more he thinks about having just met Blaine after all these years, about the conversation they just had, the more upset Kurt gets.

Finally he gets up, tossing his backpack over his shoulder. After giving his cold coffee a last look, he throws the almost full drink into the trash bin and walks out.

It's an understatement that seeing Blaine was no good for him. It was even harder than crossing paths with Dave that first time. Being honest, he hopes Blaine was just being polite by taking his number because he's pretty sure he doesn't want to meet with him again, let alone with Rachel.

At least not now. Kurt feels a little too beaten down; he's not ready for that kind of confrontation with his past. Kurt holds nothing against them, but if they spent several years being out of touch, they can easily spend another several years that way.

As Kurt walks towards the station the wind picks up and he begins to feel cold. He hugs himself, and when he reaches the corner of the street he stills; he doesn't really want to go back to his place. He switched shifts with another cashier so he's not working at MetFood or The VIP today; the encounter with Blaine was a little too disheartening and his building always depresses him. He looks at his watch and it's only ten to one. He bites his lower lip as he considers going back to Dave's apartment.

The only thing Kurt is thinking about now is Dave and not in a good way, so deep down he knows he should avoid going to his apartment. But at the same time, the weather is turning chilly and Kurt can't wander around the streets all day. He has Dave's keys, Dave's apartment is warm and cozy, and Dave won't be back until six. He can take refugee at Dave's place for just a little while and Dave doesn't have to know.

Resolved, Kurt takes the subway to Brooklyn.

The subway's not packed, thankfully, and once Kurt sits down his brain begins to assault him with all kinds of thoughts. Kurt's feeling this pressure on his chest that he can't shake off. He wants to cry, not really knowing why, so he takes deep breathes to calm down.

He's mostly uncomfortable with how easy it was to pretend Dave was his boyfriend. And it wasn't just with Blaine; Dave's co-workers also assumed they were a couple. It makes sense, after all, based on how they were acting.

Of course, neither he nor Dave corrected them because, well, what could they possibly say? Kurt wasn't going to be like, "Oh, no, I'm not his boyfriend. I'm a hooker and he's just a regular."

What's making Kurt's head hurt is that except for that one little word – boyfriend – none of it was a lie.

Dave _does_ work at American Express, Kurt _was_ there on an errand for Dave, Dave _does_ take care of him, he _is_ wearing Dave's cardigan, and Dave _is_ a former jock with weight issues. It was just a small step from all that truth to pretending Dave was his boyfriend.

Only Dave isn't, and Kurt is realizing that at some point, without even knowing what he was doing, he not only let the lines blur but he has also embraced that ambiguity.

Before, they were strangers, really. Dave was his client, and being Dave's hooker was a safe place to Kurt. A cover; a shield that put distance between them. Even when they argued or pulled information from each other, Kurt was safe because supposedly being with Dave was almost like a business deal. It was never about the money, though, because ever since the first night, Kurt was using Dave for companionship and the comfort of being with a familiar face. It was a way to stop being alone, a way to reaffirm to himself that in spite of how ghost-like he felt in his current life, he was real and he still existed in this world.

He still takes Dave's money, so technically he's just as much a prostitute as he was at the beginning. But over the past month, ever since Dave's break down, the distance between them has been disappearing. Acting like a couple, it isn't an _act,_ at least not on Kurt's part. The way he is with Dave, it just comes out naturally. He likes talking about world cuisine, and he's genuinely interested in Dave's work, even if Kurt doesn't understand a thing about bank accounts, investments, balance sheets, statistics and revenue reports. He doesn't force himself to cuddle with Dave, he doesn't plan every kiss and hug in advance. Until a couple of hours ago, he was sure that being caring towards Dave led to only positive things.

They've never been exposed to the outside world, though; it's always been just the two of them. Well, Dave met his neighbors the night Kurt's apartment was robbed, but no one even noticed him given the circumstances. Yet today, other people's eyes upon them made Kurt understand how deep he's into this with Dave. Whether it was Dave's colleagues or Blaine, Kurt was quite willing to go along with the 'boyfriend' label, unbothered, completely accepting that label. More than that, Kurt _liked_ it.

Because Kurt's falling for this guy.

That realization hits and Kurt starts sinking down so far and fast he grows dizzy. He just wants to get somewhere safe.

Once Kurt enters to Dave's apartment, he hangs up his backpack that was growing heavy on his shoulder and marches towards Dave's bedroom; he takes off his shoes and Dave's cardigan and gets into bed, wrapping the covers that smell like Dave's Hugo Boss cologne around himself. This is not the best way to start letting go, but Dave's bed is one of the few places where Kurt feels completely safe and at ease. With or without Dave, but especially with.

Kurt swallows hard as he starts analyzing his growing feelings. He's attracted to Dave, very attracted. He enjoys the time they spent together, the companionship, the affection and the care, and he's always looking forward to Mondays and Wednesdays. He worries about Dave and wants Dave to get better, not only because Dave deserves it, but because Kurt's happy when Dave's happy. He's not sure when he started liking Dave, but he does; Kurt likes Dave in a completely romantic way and it makes him feel sick.

Kurt doesn't know what to do. He likes what he has with Dave, only it's not real because money is involved. Kurt's not sure what Dave needs or expects from a guy, what kind of men Dave likes; Kurt is not sure if Dave can even handle being in a real relationship. Surely that's why he's with a prostitute in the first place, because prostitutes aren't supposed to question anything, like the fact that Dave never gets fully naked when they have sex, or that they have to eat with their backs to each other. A boyfriend would at least demand more explanations and Dave wouldn't feel comfortable giving them.

They can't be any more than what they are now, Kurt convinces himself.

It's impossible. Kurt can't really say to Dave, "This is good, want to do it for free?"

Ever since his life went to hell, the only way Kurt found to function is just to accept his circumstances and move forward. His debts, his health, his jobs, how utterly trapped he is - if Kurt stopped to think about all the things he doesn't have and compares that to all the things he might have had and expected to have, he wouldn't be able to get out of bed. So Kurt doesn't think about any of that; he just works hard, trying to avoid getting sick and making as much money as he can as quickly as he can. Logically, sooner or later his debt will be canceled and then he'll be free to be himself again.

But who is that, exactly? Before he got sick, he was fabulous, talented and full of ambition. He was the way Blaine obviously still is, and Rachel, too, apparently. But now, what does Kurt even have to offer in a relationship - with Dave or with anyone for the matter? He's a poor, asthmatic stripper and grocery cashier. He has nothing, not even a goddamn lock on his apartment door, not even a safe place to keep his nebulizer. Kurt would love to have what he has with Dave without the money involved. But all he could give is sex and companionship, and Dave can buy that from any random prostitute for the price of three hundred dollars a night or way less money than that.

He lets out a sob but forces himself not to cry. He cannot break down; he cannot crack. If Kurt pays attention to his growing feelings for Dave, eventually he'll fall hard; and deep down, Kurt knows that instead of falling in love, it will be like falling to the ground and getting crushed. Because if Kurt has learned anything from life, it's that good things don't happen to him. So these feelings for Dave - as with everything in Kurt's life - he needs to ignore them and endure them. He's strong, he has survived many worse things so he can deal with this.

Or maybe, he can't.

There's no turning back, though. They are doing well, really well, and he wouldn't want to go back to the way they were - distant, angry and utterly miserable - even if they could. And Dave has done nothing wrong but be too freaking nice and pampering, so Kurt can't just give him the cold shoulder out of nowhere.

But he realizes from all that happened today that he has to get some emotional distance. He should act the same as he acts with customers at The VIP – focus on the money and don't think about what he does, or what Dave does to him, or how he feels about any of it. At the end of the day, Dave is nothing but a client and this is nothing but a job. Kurt doesn't love him. Yet. But he could easily grow to love Dave, so the best Kurt can do is just ignore all that, so it can't touch him and he can keep on doing his job.

Kurt takes another deep breath, trying to relax. What started as a great day turned into hell. He really wishes he hadn't run into Blaine; that was like a fist of reality against his face. Trying to distract himself with something, Kurt turns the TV on; he still has a couple of hours before he has to leave so Dave doesn't realize he came back. Kurt gets hooked on a cooking show and exhales, exhausted. It has been a horrible day indeed and for Christ' sake, it's only 2 PM.

* * *

><p>After a very long day at the office, Dave finally returns to his apartment. He's beyond tired but they aced that presentation and since there had been so much stress at the office because of it, he's glad they're done.<p>

The best part of the day for sure had been seeing Kurt at work. He can't really explain why it felt so nice to see him there, but his co-workers really liked him. In fact, they spent the entire day teasing Dave mercilessly; as time goes by, Dave is getting more comfortable with his co-workers but he's finding that he's everyone's son or little brother at the office, and that's kind of a pain in the ass. Sometimes it really makes him feel silly how they treat him as 'junior.'

At least they don't do that when it comes to actual work. Yet, for them having met Kurt, his supposed _boyfriend_… Dave felt the same way as when his father and his uncle congratulated him because he shaved for the first time: awkward.

It made Dave laugh, though, and that's good enough.

He takes off his jacket and loosens his tie as he closes the door behind him. He takes a deep breath because even if he's quite pleased about the earlier presentation, he's feeling a very big craving for chicken wings and he's been trying to suppress it the entire way home. Dave's about to give up, and he's almost reaching for his phone to order delivery when he notices light coming from his bedroom. Dave frowns; maybe Kurt left the TV on this morning?

He leaves his bag on the couch and heads towards his bedroom, untucking his shirt along the way, but then stops dead in his tracks when the light from the TV illuminates Kurt's sleeping figure. Dave instantly smiles.

Trying not to make much noise, Dave sits at the edge of the bed and watches Kurt sleep for a few seconds. Immediately, he wonders why Kurt's even there. Not that he minds, since getting back from work and finding Kurt at home is actually a very pleasant surprise. But they're not supposed to see each other again until tomorrow night, so Dave worries that there must be something wrong.

Dave carefully shakes the sleeping young man, who just stirs quietly.

"Kurt?"

Dave smiles again, watching Kurt stretching lazily, and then he finally opens his eyes. Kurt blinks once, twice, frowning at Dave, obviously confused, until he suddenly sits up in bed.

"Dave?! Oh, god, _Dave_, you're home! I'm so sorry!" Kurt jumps out of bed, not even realizing that Dave tries to catch him, and starts looking for his shoes. "What time is it? Jesus, it must be super late! I'm sorry, I'm not supposed to be here, I just overslept and I didn't even mean to fall asleep on the first place-"

"Kurt…"

"I swear, it'll never happen again. I'm going to go, so-"

"_Kurt_," Dave cuts him off, almost pleading, holding Kurt by his arm and making him still.

Kurt stares at him while holding one shoe in his hand, biting his lower lip like he's a kid who's been caught doing something wrong.

"I'm sorry," Kurt whispers, visibly embarrassed and looking away. "I'd better go."

"No, don't go," Dave replies quietly, because Kurt is right there so why is he even going to leave?

"What?"

"Stay. You don't have to work tonight, right?" Kurt shakes his head no. "Then stay. C'mon, you're already here."

"I shouldn't be here, David. I totally crossed the line this time and…"

"Oh, c'mon it's not such a big deal!"

The last thing Dave wants is for Kurt to feel wretched about something that actually makes Dave happy. Seriously, this seems to bother Kurt a huge lot. He 'crossed the line'? Dave doesn't even know what the hell that means. Dave _wants_ Kurt to be comfortable at his place when Dave's not around, and even if he knows how hard it is for Kurt to accept what he considers 'charity', this is hardly something so bad that Kurt should be looking like a kicked puppy. Because of that, Dave suspects Kurt is upset about something else.

"It is, Dave! God, I stayed here for the entire day while you were away! I totally and unscrupulously abused your trust!"

"Oh, for fuck's sake, Kurt! Do you even listen to yourself?! I don't mind, okay? If it bothers you so much that I found you here, well, too bad for you, but know that I don't mind at all. In fact, after this freaking long day at work-"

"See? You had a long day and instead of getting back home and relaxing, you have an intruder at your place, taking advantage of your generosity."

Dave wants to laugh because, for some reason, he misses arguing with Kurt.

"I think you're being overly dramatic."

Kurt glares at him. "And I think you're just being unnecessary kind, as usual," he speaks icily, but Dave just glares back, only to annoy him.

"Can you at least drop that shoe?"

"I can't go back home barefoot."

"You don't have to go home. As I was saying before you interrupted me with your Shakespeare-meets-soap opera drama," Kurt glares at him, "I was going to say that after a long day at work, it's nice not to come back to an empty house. I'm glad you're here, so can you please stay?"

Kurt clenches his jaw. "I was here last night, and I'm supposed to be here tomorrow. I don't know how much money you make, but nine hundred a week for my company seems like a freaking waste of money, so let go of me and I'll see you tomorrow."

Dave didn't realize that he's still holding Kurt, so he releases him. Yet, Kurt's words upset Dave a lot; Kurt's worth all the money in the world and at the same time, Kurt shouldn't be with someone for money. But right now Kurt's here and Dave really doesn't want to watch him go.

Dave decides to compromise. "Stay tonight and we'll skip tomorrow."

Kurt stares at him for long seconds; staying or not seems to be a big debate in Kurt's head, and it only raises Dave's suspicions. He's now sure that something happened with Kurt, because he wasn't like this when they met this morning. Kurt was content, or at least he seemed to be. Dave doesn't know how late Kurt usually stays at his apartment after Dave goes to work, but now that he thinks back he remembers Kurt acted all guilty about still being there this morning, too. And the way he's so upset now, it's obvious that something made Kurt come back to his apartment, and that something is probably behind why staying seems to weigh on Kurt's mind.

"Okay, I'll stay," Kurt says quietly, dropping his shoe on the floor.

Dave nods, swallowing hard. He doesn't want to look worried, but Kurt is upset and by deciding to stay, Dave gets that Kurt also needs comfort and – uncharacteristically for Kurt - he's actually accepting it; seeking it. Maybe not _Dave's_ comfort, but at least the protection that Dave's apartment provides. Or maybe Dave is reading too much into the situation, but he can't help it.

He quickly tries to organize what's next. Act normal, that's a must; Dave knows he shouldn't press Kurt's buttons when he's upset for real. Order food, watch a movie, drink coffee and have sex; it's as easy as that, a routine they've been building for weeks. Kurt being there on a different day, it doesn't make any difference.

"We should order-"

Kurt is suddenly kissing him hard and hungrily. It catches Dave off guard and he frowns to himself, but he kisses back anyway, even if he does not have a good feeling about this. Kurt's arms are around Dave's neck, practically clinging to him and Dave holds him tight in an attempt to _contain_ him somehow. Kurt's hands quickly find the buttons of Dave's shirt and in a matter of seconds, Dave's shirt and pants are on the floor, along with half of Kurt's clothes. They don't stop kissing, not even for a second.

Dave's hot; of course he's always hot and horny whenever Kurt wants him. Even if they've been having sex for months, there are still moments when Dave goes all _Oh, my God. I'm having sex with Kurt Hummel,_ the realization hitting him like that very first time together, skeptical at his own luck, and he goes with it because he cannot miss the incredible chance he's been blessed with – as if the money involved didn't have anything to do with that chance.

Kurt pushes him back on the bed, quickly crawling on top of him, and continues to devour his mouth. Dave moans loudly, and he gets even louder when Kurt presses their groins together. They're both equally hard; Kurt always manages to get him incredibly aroused in a matter of seconds. He's nervous, though, and he shouldn't be because this is sex and sex is their number one activity. Sex is what they do the most when they're together. But there's _something_ in Kurt's attitude that Dave can't pinpoint.

It's not the first time that Kurt has jumped him. Yet, when Kurt jumps him so straightforwardly, it's usually because Kurt's mad at him, or because he wants to prove a point – like 'you pay me to fuck me.' Right now, it's neither of those options and Dave doesn't know how to interpret Kurt's actions. So Dave lets his lust drive him, because deep down he's slightly freaking out.

"Dave," Kurt moans between kisses, tugging Dave's underwear.

They untangle from each other just enough to finish getting naked - almost naked in Dave's case since he won't take off his tee under any circumstance - and they're back in each other's arms, their lips and tongues colliding once again, as if they're unable to stay apart. Even if Dave wanted to break away at least to breathe, he has the feeling Kurt wouldn't let him.

"C'mon, Dave. I need you," Kurt breathes out almost painfully, and a shiver runs down Dave's spine.

_Need._ Kurt is _needy. _

Sometimes Dave wishes he was able to drop all this shit, and go to clubs and have regular uncomplicated casual sex with strangers. The last couple of weeks with Kurt have been quite easy, but there's nothing easy about _Kurt_; there's nothing easy about them together.

Kurt is practically invading him. Dave can feel Kurt all over and around himself, as if Kurt had grown three new pairs of hands, touching him everywhere at once. It's not bad, but it's overwhelming, because while he's had all kinds of sex - angry sex, rough sex, lazy sex, cathartic sex - Dave's never been _needed_.

Kurt somehow needs him; it's the first time that it's explicit not only by Kurt's words but by his actions and attitude, and Dave knows that there's more going on than Kurt just trying to get off. Kurt needs him to temporary fix something. It's as gratifying as it is scary; as much as Dave wants Kurt to want him for real, it's a bittersweet moment.

Dave rolls over, pinning Kurt down against the mattress, and in spite of their forceful and desperate actions, Kurt lets out a relieved sigh that melts Dave's brain. Whatever it is that's upsetting Kurt, Dave has to make it better even if it's only for half an hour.

Dave provides, of course. He starts kissing and biting Kurt's jaw, and Kurt writhes beneath him, quickly facing away to expose his neck. Dave loves that sight; Kurt's craning his long and elegant neck, arching his back at the same time, and it makes it look even longer and Dave can't do anything but sink down and suck bruises in the tender skin that Kurt's showing off.

"God, _yes_," Kurt moans contently as he fists Dave's hair.

Kurt's moving his hips upwards, frantically pressing his hard cock against Dave so Dave wastes no time grabbing the lube and condom.

Everything is fast, but unrushed. It takes Dave just a couple of minutes to have three fingers working on Kurt's entrance, but they're both tense, impatiently waiting for what's soon to come. Kurt grunts as Dave's fingers work deep inside him, and Dave can see the tension in Kurt's hands, how they clench as they fist the sheets. For some reason, Dave's nervous as if he doesn't know what to expect even though they've had sex uncountable times.

Kurt's needs come first, though, and once Dave is sure Kurt's prepped enough, without hesitation he pulls Kurt's legs apart and in one quick motion shoves his cock inside Kurt. Dave's keeps his eyes right on Kurt's face; he needs to read this carefully, and the fact that Kurt arches his back and his mouth hands half open in a small grin, it startles Dave. It startles him that once again, Kurt looks freaking _relieved_ and Dave doesn't know how to embrace the fact that he's needed so obviously much, so he focuses on the sex, solely and plainly.

"Fuck, David," Kurt cries out as Dave starts thrusting firmly and deeply.

Kurt squirms, digging his nails in Dave's back, scratching him all the way up to his neck and then he pulls Dave's face down for a forceful kiss. It quickly turns into something else though; the rush and the hunger slowly fades, and Dave finds himself pressing his tongue against Kurt's leisurely. Kurt's not scratching him anymore, but caressing him and then Kurt sighs contently inside Dave's mouth and Dave feels… he doesn't know what he feels. It's good, though; for some reason Dave feels like smiling, and he's still thrusting inside Kurt, but now unhurried, trying to savor every second of this moment.

They break apart, and Dave finds Kurt staring at him intensely; Kurt makes no sound except for the little gasps he lets out with every thrust. There's no expression on his face, he's not smiling or frowning or scowling or smirking. He doesn't look pleased or happy or sad or troubled; yet Kurt's eyes are intense, and Kurt's staring at him, and Dave grows uncomfortable, not knowing what's behind the way Kurt's gaze is boring holes in his brain. So he picks up his pace, shoving his cock into Kurt harder and faster, dragging Kurt out of that trance. Everything goes back to normal; he's moaning, Kurt's moaning and it's rough and perfectly safe.

It doesn't stay that way, though, because a few minutes later, while Dave's sitting back on his heels, Kurt's legs resting on his shoulders, and pounding hard inside Kurt's ass, Kurt tries to pull him forward. Dave leans over, assuming Kurt wants him closer but Kurt holds Dave's hand as soon as it's within reach, and gives Dave a _look._

Dave swallows hard.

"Please?" Kurt asks, his voice small, making Dave feel torn between unease and excitement.

They haven't done this since the night they talked about it. Dave believed he had managed to talk Kurt out of this kink by explaining that for Dave it's something more than just a playful thing to do to spice up sex. It's something strong and Dave knows that he doesn't want to create anything strong with Kurt, because it will be strongly one sided and Dave's usually on the losing side.

But he can't say no to Kurt, and Kurt's clear preference only makes it easier to ignore his own good judgment. Almost as though he were powerless over his own actions, Dave puts his hand on Kurt's perfect neck and Kurt exhales shakily, like he's _relieved_ that Dave's agreeing to do this, and _what the fuck_ does that even mean?

It doesn't matter now, though; Dave slows down the pace of his thrusts so he can focus on this moment. He squeezes his fingers around Kurt's throat, listening to the beautiful little gasp that Kurt lets out when he's out of breath. It's almost hypnotic. Dave pushes his cock deeper and harder, but not faster, keeping the pace slow just to savour the way Kurt jumps in pleasure and lets out a breathless gasp with each thrust. Dave finally lets his fingers loose; Kurt breathes in quickly but frowns in displeasure, so Dave tightens his grip around Kurt's throat, making him smile contently.

For someone who'd never been exposed to choking before, it seems that Kurt gets it pretty well and wants to set the pace, which is somewhat scary. Even though his face is quickly turning red, Kurt looks relaxed, and while they've done this more than a couple of times, Dave has never seen Kurt the way he's seeing him now: like being choked brings him peace instead of dangerous pleasure. This is not about spicing it up, Dave quickly realizes, because under his grip Kurt is hot, but he's also calm. Somehow Kurt was knocked off balance today, and now he's letting Dave put him back together; he's trusting Dave with this, offering the control… his control.

Dave loosens his grip once again, just long enough for Kurt to take a deep breath, and then Dave is choking him again before he can even complain. Kurt lets out a strangled moan, writhing in ecstasy, and the sight is starting to mess with Dave's head. It's exhilarating watching Kurt giving himself up to this, to _him_. They're not in love, the bond between them is not the one Dave wishes to have with someone he'd share this with, but fuck, this is _Kurt_. How can Dave walk away from this deal?

Dave speeds up, not knowing how much longer he can last since this is the freaking hottest thing he has ever done with Kurt. At some point, Kurt grunts violently and his head falls back and his mouth hangs open in breathless pants and Dave knows he hit the prostate, so he fucks Kurt harder at the same angle, hitting that spot over and over. Kurt tenses more and more, his face is furiously and beautifully red; Dave fists Kurt's cock and it takes just two strokes to make him come.

"Dave," Kurt cries out, low and breathless, and then he convulses, the orgasm taking him hard. Kurt's muscles clench around Dave's cock, pushing Dave to the very edge but he stays focused on his lover.

Dave lets Kurt go. "Deep breaths," he commands, and Kurt nods slowly. "Just a bit more, okay?"

Close to orgasm himself, Dave thrusts inside Kurt hard and desperately; Kurt holds him tight, whimpering, since Dave is not giving him a second to rest and it's hard to catch his breath with Dave fucking him so violently. Luckily for Kurt, Dave comes right after and Kurt breathes out, relieved, as Dave's body shakes after a blinding orgasm.

"Hey, it's okay," Kurt tells him quietly.

"Ugh," Dave groans, blinking since he can only see white. He pants, his muscles grow weak and he collapses on the mattress next to Kurt.

The sound of their breathing fills the silence and in spite of being exhausted, Dave pays close attention to Kurt's breathing and nods, reassured as he notes that Kurt's breathing is normal; Dave didn't hurt him, even that was by far the longest time he has ever choked Kurt.

He disposes of the condom in the floor – gross, he'll clean up in a minute - but after a couple of minutes, Kurt is the one who rolls off the bed, just to pick up some clothes to wipe the come off his belly, and then lies back in bed.

"You need a shower, or at least to change that tee," Kurt muses. "I could really use a shower too."

Dave turns on his side to face Kurt and smiles at him. Kurt never looks as stunning as he does after sex; the relaxed eyes, the messy hair, the soft smile…

Kurt snuggles up to Dave and Dave just holds him close. He's content and Kurt seems content as well; it doesn't mean that Kurt isn't still upset, and as the post-orgasm daze starts wearing off, Dave begins to think about that.

"What happened?" Dave blurts out.

"What do you mean?"

"You're upset."

He cannot resist even though he's pushing his luck; Dave needs to know or the wondering won't leave him alone. Kurt is staring at him, not particularly mad. He looks more like Dave question's caught him off guard; like he was expecting Dave not to notice.

"Nothing."

"C'mon, Kurt. I don't want to make you mad, but I'm worried."

Kurt bites his lower lip, resting his head on Dave's shoulder. "You should not worry about me, David."

Dave just shrugs. "Please, tell me. You were fine this morning."

Kurt lets out a long sigh. "I went to Starbucks, after I said goodbye to you…"

Dave opens his eyes wide, since he didn't expect that Kurt was going to tell him so easily. But he listens. After Kurt doesn't say anything more for a while, Dave asks softly, "And...?"

"I ran into Blaine." Kurt's sounds genuinely upset now. "You know, my first boyfriend?"

For some reason he can't explain, Dave feels his stomach drop. Kurt looks up at him, and at the lack of response, Kurt adds, "You met him once, remember? At McKinley?"

He nods because of course he remembers Kurt's handsome, slender boyfriend. Dave remembers how upset he was about that guy, stealing Kurt away from him even though Kurt had never been his.

"Did something bad happen?" he asks after Kurt falls silent again.

"We talked a bit. He wants us to meet again," Kurt says and shrugs. "I just, I'm sorry. I don't really want to talk about it. But it's nothing bad, I promise. Don't worry about me, alright?"

Kurt even kisses his cheek in tender affection and Dave smiles at him weakly. He won't push it; Kurt already told him and Dave is quite grateful for that. "Want to order some food while I take a shower? Anything you want."

Kurt smiles widely now. Dave's heart clenches. "Italian," he says, excited, like he has a sudden craving. Dave could just eat him up; Kurt chose the food instead of throwing out his usual 'you pick, you're the one paying, I'm just the whore' line.

Dave kisses him soundly, and gets up from bed. "Italian it is, then."

It is in the shower that Dave starts freaking out. _Blaine_. For the first time, Dave wishes Kurt would go away so he could drown himself in another binge. He can't explain why, but Dave feels threatened all of a sudden and something tells him that this feeling won't fade anytime soon.


End file.

Glee, Angst, Romance