1. Chapter 1: The New Girl

**AN: Hey everyone! So, I've started working on something new. I'm taking from Olivia's promotion and the last episode where they were short handed but other than that nothing is really coming from the show other than the characters. This story happens as if Capt. Cragen didn't decide to retire but that might change as the story goes on. Please review and tell me what you think. Your reviews will determine whether I continue with this story or let it fall by wayside. Thanks in advance for your feedback. They're always appreciated. **

**This will be my one and only disclaimer: I do not own Law and Order: SVU or any of its characters. They are the work product of Dick Wolf and NBC. I do claim ownership of all original characters.**

Chapter 1: The New Girl

The blaring of the alarm clock on her bedside table woke her promptly at seven in the morning. She fought the urge to hit the snooze button and go back to sleep for ten more minutes. Instead, she gathered the will to get out of bed and head to the bathroom to prepare for work. It was her first day at a new precinct and she didn't want to be late. She wasn't worried about fitting in or proving anything or impressing anyone. She just wanted to do her job and go home safe every night, same as any other cop. She took a quick shower before washing her face and brushing her teeth. She dressed in cargo pants and a blue shirt that showed just a sliver of her midriff with black combat style boots. Her pants were too big so she put on a black belt, setting the buckle slightly off center in her signature style, then clipped on her badge and gun. She pulled her long jet black hair back into a ponytail and headed down to the kitchen to put her coffee on. After a couple of minutes of looking around the house she found what she was searching for. She grabbed her bag and made sure everything she needed was in it and sat it by the door before running back up the stairs to make sure her brother and sister were awake and getting ready for work and school. She went into her mother's room and set out her medication for when she woke up and then went back downstairs to the kitchen. She made her coffee, went over and grabbed her bag and then headed out the door.

She arrived at the 16th precinct at eight fifteen. She went up on the elevator and walked down the hall to the squad room doors. As she walked down the hall, she took in her surroundings; the walls, the cops, the criminals, everything. This was going to be her new home for an undetermined amount of time and she was ready to start getting used to it. She finally reached the squad room and took it in the same as she'd done the hallway. Amanda noticed her when she entered, looking around like she might be lost or wasn't sure she wanted to be there. She got up from her desk and approached her.

"Hi, can I help you?" she asked in a sweet southern tone while glancing over her appearance. It was then that she saw the badge that rested on her hip. _"There's no way she's a cop. She looks like a kid",_ Amanda thought to herself. Her staring didn't go unnoticed by the mystery woman standing in front of her.

"Yeah, I'm here to see Captain Cragen" she said hoping for some direction.

"He's in his office" Amanda said pointing to the Captain's door. She got a quick smile and a quiet thanks before the woman walked away in the direction of Cragen's door. She gave a light knock and waited. She heard a man yell for her to come in so she went inside and shut the door behind her. Amanda walked back over to her desk and sat down.

"Who's that?" Fin asked having watched the exchange between his partner and the woman. "I don't know. She didn't say. She just asked for the Captain" she said back, glancing towards Cragen's office. Olivia also looked in the direction of Cragen's office and Nick followed her gaze, looking over his shoulder. Moments later, Captain Cragen's door opened and they all tried to pretend as if they hadn't just been staring through the open blinds of his office window. He walked over and stood in front of their desks.

"You four listen up" he said getting their attention, "as you're all aware with Olivia's promotion we're down a detective on the squad. Even though we know she'll still be on the streets, one pp thinks we need the extra body because officially Liv is supposed to be taking more of a supervisory role. Meet Detective Christina Reyes. Introduce yourselves, show her the ropes, make her feel welcome" he said. He left them to do the introductions on their own and returned to his office.

"I'm Nick...Amaro" he said getting up from his desk to shake her hand. "That's Olivia Benson, Amanda Rollins, and Fin Tutuola" he said introducing everyone else. "It's nice to meet all of you" she said with a small wave. They looked her up and down, taking in her attire, "I've already been told that my style of dress is inappropriate. I'll do better tomorrow" she said noticing their stares.

"Uh, you can take this desk right over here" Olivia said pointing to the desk behind her. Christina walked over and put her bag on the desk and sat down. She wasn't sure what to do next. She hadn't brought anything to decorate. Decorating wasn't really her thing. She was about to turn around and ask if their was any work for her to do when Olivia walked over and plopped some files down on her desk.

"You know the standard paperwork right?" she asked. Reyes nodded and got right to work. Everyone that walked through the squad room would glance at her, trying to figure out who she was. A couple of officers were standing over by the stairs leading up to the crib, whispering about her. Liv, Nick, Amanda and Fin could tell that she doing her best to ignore them and focus on her work. After about ten minutes, she'd had enough.

"Don't you two have anything else to do besides stand there and talk about me?" They looked like deer in headlights, surprised that she'd said anything to confront them. "Go protect and serve or something" she said shooing them away. They walked away embarrassed that they'd been called out in front of everyone. Lunch came quickly and everyone left but Christina. Amanda and Fin had invited her to come with them but she declined stating that she wasn't hungry. After they came back from lunch she'd gone through all the files Olivia had given her and was sitting quietly at her desk waiting for something interesting to happen. She didn't want to hope they'd get a case because that meant somebody was hurt but she was bored out of her mind. After sitting there with nothing to do for about twenty minutes she turned to Olivia and asked if she had anything else for her to do. Olivia handed her another stack of files and she happily took them and got to work. At six o'clock they started to pack up to head out. They'd talked over lunch about wanting to get to know their new teammate better so they decided to ask her to join them for dinner and some drinks.

"Hey, Christina" Amaro said getting her attention. She swiveled around in her chair, "Chris...just Chris is fine" she said. "Ok, Chris. We're gonna go get some dinner, maybe have a few drinks. You wanna join us?" he asked. She didn't want to be rude but she really needed to get home. Then again she had to work with these people and trust them with her life and her with theirs. "Uhh, yeah. Sounds good" she said after some thought. She stood up from her chair and grabbed her jacket and bag and followed them out of the building. They went to a burger joint nearby and were seated almost immediately. Nick, Fin, Amanda and Liv all ordered right away, having been there enough times to not need the menu. After glancing over it for a minute Chris ordered a beer and cheese fries.

"That's all you're gonna eat? Cheese fries?" Fin asked. He knew she'd skipped lunch and thought she had to be starving by now. "Yeah. I, uh, I don't eat meat so that's all they've got that I can eat here" she explained.

"Well, we can go somewhere else" Olivia suggested receiving nods from the rest of the group. "Oh, no. It's fine. I'm good" Chris said objecting to the change in venue. "If you're sure" she said. "I am" she said back.

"So Reyes, what are you like twelve" Amaro said teasing her. She laughed and took a drink from the beer that the waiter had just brought to the table. "Fourteen actually" she shoot back. They all laughed, "Quick on your feet. I like it" he said. "So where you from?"

"California. San Bernardino" she said. "And I thought I was a long way from home" Amanda said. "Why? Where are you from?" Chris asked. "Atlanta, Georgia" she said. "That one's from Miami and these two are the genuine articles. New Yorkers, born and raised". The waitress brought out their food and they all began to eat and ordered more beers for the table.

"So what'd you work in Cali?" Fin asked.

"I was in homicide for all of about fifteen days" she said. They all paused and waited for her to say that she was joking but after a moment of silence they knew she wasn't. "Fif...fifteen days, that's it? Nick asked. She nodded, "Yep, that's it. They didn't really like me there. They said I was...too insentitive. So they transferred me to narcotics and I was there for three years, two of which were undercover and now I'm here" she explained. They all looked around the table at each other. If she was transferred from homicide for being too insensitive then special victims was definitely not the place for her. "Don't worry" she said noticing their nervous glances at each other, "I've had a lot of sensitivity training" she said taking another drink from her beer. She finished her fries and sat quietly, waiting for them to ask her more questions. "So wh..." Olivia started to ask her a question when a guy came up to the table and interrupted their conversation.

"Excuse me" he said looking at Chris, "I just noticed you from across the room and I wanted to know...". Chris decided to stop him before he put too much effort into her, "No" she said. He looked confused, "But I didn't ask you anything yet" he said laughing nervously. "Ok" she said taking another sip of her beer, "What did you want to ask me?". He smiled, "Just wanted to know if I could buy you a drink" he said. She took another drink from her beer and pretended to think about it, "No" she said again. "Come on, one drink? Maybe your name, your number?". They all watched as the guy continued to embarrass himself. She'd already said no to a drink and he thought she'd give him her name and number. _"Poor guy. Doesn't stand a chance"_ Amanda thought to herself. "Ummm, no, no, and no" she said. At this point she just wanted the guy to go away. "What am I not your type or something?" he asked. She finished the rest of her beer and turned to look the guy over. He wasn't bad looking, blonde hair and blue eyes, maybe late twenties, a scar just before his hair line, and from the jeans and plaid shirt she guessed he was a blue collar worker. "No" she repeated. He wasn't sure if she was saying no, he wasn't her type, or no, that's not the problem. She ran her hand through her hair, brushing back a few strands that had fallen loose, and he saw the shine of a ring on her third finger. "Oh, alright. I got it. You're taken" he said backing away, "Y'all enjoy the rest of your night". He turned and went back to his seat at the bar. Chris rolled her eyes and held her glass up to the waitress, indicating she'd like another round. She asked if anyone else wanted one, only Amanda joined her for another.

"So, you married?" Nick asked pointing to her ring. "Oh, god no" she said. She thanked the waitress who'd just brought her and Amanda their third beer. It didn't go unnoticed by any of them that waitress was trying to flirt with Christina but she seemed to uninterested. "But you wear a ring?". She took a large gulp from her glass. She really hated doing the whole "get to know you" routine but it was unavoidable. She needed to get along with these people. "It's my mother's" she said. He nodded his understanding, "She pass away or?". He trailed off leaving her to fill in the blank. She shook her head, "No, she's...still alive". Everyone at the table looked confused as to why she'd be wearing her mother's ring if she was alive. "Your parent's divorced?" Fin asked. "No. They're still happily married" she said. The more questions they asked and answers they got from her, the more confused they became. "It's just a...family tradition to pass down rings to your oldest. So when someone wants to marry me, they have to get permission from my mother. She's the only one who can take it off. It's pretty stupid, I know" she said with a little laugh. "Naw, it's not stupid. Not stupid at all" Amaro said. He couldn't put his finger on it but he had a feeling that something was off about this girl. If she was gonna be working on the squad, he wanted to figure out what it was.

"So, you're the oldest" Amanda asked. Rae shook her head, "No. I'm in the middle but I'm the oldest girl. I have an older brother and a younger sister" he explained. "Me too" Amanda said with a hint of sadness. "I mean, I have a younger sister. No brother" she clarified. "Well, you can have mine if you want him" she said joking. They both finished their beers and Amanda decided that she wanted to have a real conversation with this girl. Not a question and answer session, but a real conversation.

"So, why here?" Olivia asked, getting out the question she was trying to ask earlier. Chris raised her eyebrows to convey her confusion over the question. "Why send you here to New York? Are there not special victims units in San Bernardino?" she clarified. "Uh, yeah. Of course there are. I just made a personal move, with my family. This is just where I landed" she said.

"So you didn't request special victims? You had no say in this?" Amaro asked. She shook her head, "No. I told my Captain I was moving here and asked for him to put in a word for me on a transfer. I didn't ask for any specific assignment so I guess he just put me where he could" she said explaining. The mood of the conversation had definitely changed. She could see that the four of them, especially Olivia, didn't like her nonchalant attitude about being in the unit. Her phone started to ring and she excused herself from the table to take the call.

"Are they serious with this girl?" Amaro said as soon as she was out of earshot. "I mean do they really think she'll make it here? Who gets kicked out of homicide for being insensitive?" he asked. Fin just shrugged his shoulders. "She doesn't seem like she wants to or even cares about being in this unit. You can't have that kind of attitude when dealing with victims" Olivia said taking a sip from her beer.

"Well now, hold up. Maybe we should just, you know, give her a chance. I mean, Fin you said you didn't know anything about sex crimes when you first joined the unit. And Nick you'd never worked special victims either" Amanda said coming to the newbie's defense. "Yeah but I at least wanted to be here. I wanted to learn" he said.

"I never heard her say she didn't want to be here. She said she didn't _ask_ to be here. Hell neither did I and I've been here fourteen years now. I'm with Amanda on this. We gotta give her a chance to prove herself". Just then, Chris walked back over to the table, "Ummm, I have to go. I have a...family...thing" she said trying to find the words to explain her leaving. She went into her bag and took out her wallet to leave money on the table. "Don't worry about it. It's on us tonight" Fin said stopping her from leaving any money.

"Oh, you don't have to that" she said quickly. "I know" he said simply. She sighed and put the money back in her wallet and returned it to her bag. "Ok, well, ummmm, thanks. I'll see you guys tomorrow". They said goodbye and she turned towards the door. She stopped to talk to the waitress that had served them, wrote something on her notepad and walked out of the restaurant to head home. "Well, I guess he really wasn't her type" Nick said. They stayed for a little while longer, all agreeing that they'd give the new girl some time to adjust and show them what she could do before writing her off. After another hour, they settled the bill and left, heading their separate ways.


	2. Chapter 2: Warming Up

Chapter 2: Warming Up

The next day they came in and Chris wasn't at her desk. It was only eight and they were early so they didn't think anything of it. Thirty minutes passed and she was officially late. It was only her second day and Benson didn't exactly like her so far, so the chances of her covering for her were slim. Five minutes later she walked through the squad room doors. She was wearing black slacks and a red shirt tucked into her pants, her badge and gun clipped to her belt. It was only eight thirty five and she was already on her second cup of coffee in thirty minutes. It had been a long night for her but she was up and at it this morning, working hard to get her sister to school and still make it to work on time.

"I know, I'm late. Sorry" she said to Olivia as she hustled over to her desk. She looked flustered as she sat her bag and coffee down on her desk. Everything in the room was darkly tinted and then she realized that she was still wearing her sunglasses. She moved them from her eyes and rested them on top of her head. She sat down at her desk with soft thud and rubbed her hands over her face.

"You know, it's only your second day and you're already late" Olivia said sitting on the edge of her desk, "You planning on making a habit of this?".

Chris looked up at her, "Of course not" she said. She cleared her throat and took a sip of her coffee. "It won't happen again". Olivia nodded and went back to her own desk.

"You look like you're getting the hang of this a little bit, newbie" Nick said to her on his way back to his desk from getting coffee.

"What?" she asked confused.

"Your wardrobe" he explained. She rolled her eyes then grabbed her coffee cup and headed over to fill it.

Amanda walked over to her, "Long night?" she asked grabbing a new styrofoam cup.

"Uh, yeah". Amanda watched as Chris took six packets of sugar and dumped them into the bottom of her travel cup before filling it with coffee.

"That's a lot sugar" she said.

Chris laughed, "Yeah, well, it was a _really_ long night". She turned and went back to her desk and sat down to a stack of files that she assumed Olivia put there for her. Capt. Cragen came out of his office a minute later.

"We've got a victim at Bellevue hospital" he said holding up a sticky note.

"Fin, Rollins, you're up" Benson said from her desk.

They both got up and started to head out, "No" he said stopping them, "Rollins you go...and take Reyes with you" he said. Her head snapped around at the sound of her name.

"Uh, Captain I don't think that's a good idea" Olivia said standing up from her chair. "Uh, I second that" Amaro said walking over and standing next to Olivia. "She's gonna have to get her feet wet sometime. No better time than the present". Cragen handed the note to Rollins then turned and went back into his office.

"Come on" Rollins said prompting Chris to follow her. She grabbed her pen, notepad, and coffee and started to follow Amanda out of the squad room.

"Rollins, just hold up a sec" Olivia said as she went over to Cragen's office and lightly knocked on the door. She went in and shut the door behind her.

"Olivia. I'm guessing you have more to say on my decision to send Reyes with Rollins".

"Yeah, she's not ready". Cragen stood up and walked around his desk and stood in front of her with his hands in his pockets. "She doesn't know what questions to ask, or how to sympathize with the victims, or how to...".

He held his hand up to stop her, "How do you expect her to learn if she stays at her desk all the time?" he asked.

"She can watch the interview once the vic comes back to the station and she can get her feet wet here during the investigation".

"She's knows how to investigate, Liv. She worked homicide..."

Olivia scoffed, "Yeah for fifteen days" she said as if it didn't count.

"And she worked narcotics for three years. She was a star pupil, helped bring down a couple of drug rings. We can use her". Olivia opened her mouth to argue some more but Cragen put his hand up to stop her, "She has to start somewhere, just like you did". He walked back around his desk, "Now, I know that you and Fin are probably tired of breaking in new blood which is why I sent her with Rollins. She and Amaro have been here long enough now to help show her the ropes. You gotta give her a chance, Olivia", he said retaking his seat behind his desk. She sighed and went back out into the squad room.

"We good?" Rollins asked.

"Uh, yeah". Olivia started to walk back to her desk but then stopped and turned back to the door, "Hey, Reyes" she called after her. Chris turned and looked at her, "Why don't you let Rollins do the talking this time?" she suggested. Chris just nodded and turned around, took her sunglasses off her head to cover her eyes, and followed Rollins to the elevator to leave the building. On the drive to the hospital, Chris stared out the window. She was still trying to get familiar with New York streets. She looked at the landscape and took note of the street signs as Rollins drove. She could see her taking glances at her out of the corner of her eye and decided to try to start a conversation.

"She doesn't like me much does she?" she asked. Rollins was so busy trying to focus on the road and sneak glances at her companion that the question caught her off guard.

"Huh?".

Chris looked over at her, "Sgt Benson. She's not too big a fan of my being here" she said, not really asking this time.

"Oh...it's just gonna take her some time to warm up to you" Amanda said. "How long have you worked with her?" she said looking out the window again. "About three years now".

"The first time you went to interview a victim did she tell you not to talk?" Amanda stopped at a red light and looked over at Chris. She knew she was trying to make a point that it was obvious Olivia's behavior had nothing to do with needing to warm up to her. She just didn't like her, plain and simple.

"No...she didn't" Amanda answered. "But I worked SVU in Atlanta so I wasn't really a rookie. She knows you haven't done this before and she just want to ease you into it, that's all" she said trying to make excuses for Liv.

"Yeah, I'm sure that's all it is".

Amanda pulled up to the hospital and parked the car. They went inside and walked to the nurses station. Rollins showed her badge, "Hi. Detective Rollins, my partner Detective Reyes. There was a call about rape victim".

The nurse nodded her head, "Yes. Rape kit's done but you might have some trouble getting a statement from her" she said looking at chart.

"Why's that?" Rollins asked.

"I think she may be illegal. She got agitated when she was told the police were coming. She's been asking to leave". She put the chart on a rack with a bunch of others and walked out from behind the nurses station. She pointed down the hall, "She's in exam three".

They walked down the hall then stopped outside a door with the uniformed officers standing outside. Amanda introduced them to the officers, "Either of you talk to her?" she asked as she looked into the room through the small rectangular window.

"I talked, she yelled. I thought it best we wait out here til SVU arrived" the male officer said. His female partner chimed in, "Name's Ariana Soto. Just a warning, her english isn't that great".

Amanda nodded, "Thanks". Amanda knocked lightly on the door before going in. Chris followed quietly behind her.

The girl was sitting up in the bed staring at them as they entered the room. Her legs were hanging over the side and she was still wearing her hospital gown. Finger shaped bruises were visible on her wrists and thighs and she had cuts and scrapes on her face and knees. She had a black eye and a split lip and they could tell that her nose had been bleeding. She didn't look any older than seventeen. "Hi, Ariana" Rollins said slowly approaching her, "My name is Amanda Rollins. This is Christina Reyes" she said gesturing to the woman behind her. "We're Detectives with the Special Victims Unit and we want to talk to you about what happened? Do you understand?". The girl stared back and forth between them, then looked down at her feet. "Ariana" Rollins said getting her to look at her again, "Can you tell us what happened?"

"No. I want to go home". She had a thick accent and sounded like she was on the verge of tears.

"I understand if you're scared but we can help you. It's important that you talk to us so that whoever did this to you doesn't hurt any other girls". Chris stood quietly behind Amanda as she tried to get the girl to cooperate.

"I not want your help. I say nothing". She had a lot of sass in her voice and Chris immediately thought of her younger sister.

"¿Cuántos años tienes?" Chris asked finally speaking up from behind Amanda.

"Dieciseis" she answered.

"Tengo una hermana de tu edad" she said as she walked a little closer to her.

Ariana rolled her eyes, "Asi que lo que" she said back. The amount of attitude coming off the girl was enough for Chris to stop trying to be nice and get down to business.

"Mira chica, estamos aquí para usted. Los dos sabemos que si se va a salir, te lo hubieras hecho antes de llegar aquí. Así que ¿por qué no se le cae la actitud y responder a nuestras preguntas, ok?" Amanda wasn't sure what Chris had just said to the girl but her no nonsense tone was very clear. "And don't think for a second that I can't see through this bullshit "I don't speak english" game you're trying to play". She looked down at her feet again and took a heavy breath.

"I was at a party last night" she started. Her accent wasn't as thick as before and she'd toned down her attitude. "It was a birthday party for my friend's brother, Monte. He turned twenty one. Their parents were out of town so he used their house and said that she could invite some friends. It was just so she wouldn't say anything. We were having fun, everything was good. Then I started to feel dizzy and sick. Raquel, my friend, she said I could go lay down in her room". Rollins took notes on what Ariana was saying and wrote down names as she said them. "It's all a little blurry. I remember feeling someone on top of me, holding my wrists and touching my hair. He was heavy and it was hard to breath. I tried to yell but the music was too loud". She stopped talking and started to cry.

"It's alright, honey. You're doing great" Amanda said. "What else do you remember?" she asked, encouraging her to continue. She took a deep breath before continuing, "Ummm...he was gentle at first and then when I yelled he got mad. That's when he started hitting me".

"Can you remember any details about him? Hair color, eye color, any distinguishing marks?"

She shook her head, "No. It was dark and when he...started I just shut my eyes". They talked to her for a while longer, getting as much information as they could from her before she got overwhelmed and asked to take a break. She begged them not to call her parents. They said they wouldn't but advised her to do it herself. If she was planning on moving forward with pressing charges they would find out anyway and it was best that they hear it from her. She asked Chris if she would help her tell them and she agreed that she would. They told her that she could shower and get changed and the officers outside would escort her to the police station when she was ready. Chris gave her a card then they left the hospital. When they got back to the precinct, Chris went to the bathroom and Rollins went back into the squad room. Olivia started questioning her before she could even take off her jacket and sit down.

"So, how'd it go?" she asked from her desk.

"Fine" she said not giving any details. Chris walked into the squad room and went to her desk. Just as she sat down her phone started to ring. She didn't recognize the number but answered anyway.

"Reyes" she said into the speaker. "Yes, Ariana" she said looking over at Rollins. It'd only been a little over twenty minutes since they left the hospital and the teenager was already putting her number to use. "Por que no?" Rollins waited while she was on the phone with the girl for her to tell her what the next move was. "No hasta que mi digas por que no quiere que los oficiales que lo lleve". Amaro and Olivia understood what Reyes was saying but Amanda and Fin only caught bits of the one sided conversation. "Por que no puedes contestar a mi pregunta?" She listened to Ariana talk on the other end for a minute before speaking again, "Ok. We'll come back". She hung up the phone and looked at Amanda, "She wants us to come and get her. She says the uniforms there make her uncomfortable" she said using air quotes. Rollins got back up and put her jacket back on before grabbing her keys and heading for the door with Reyes.

"Wait a minute" Olivia said stopping them, "what's going on?" she said wanting some clarity on the situation.

"The vic is sixteen year old Ariana Soto. She was possibly drugged and raped at a birthday party. We got as much as we could out of her at the hospital but she was starting to shut down so we stopped and let her get cleaned up. We were gonna have the unis that responded bring her over when she was ready but apparently, she doesn't want to ride with them" Rollins said giving Olivia the cliff notes.

"Uh, I thought we agreed that you would do all the talking? Why is she calling Reyes" she asked.

"She liked me better" Chris said speaking up. Rollins gave her a playful glare and Chris just looked away and laughed.

"She was hesitant to cooperate at first, pretending that she didn't speak english. Reyes stepped in and was able to get her talking" Amanda explained.

"Ok, well why don't you take Amaro and Reyes can stay here and get started on writing up her statement". Nick started to get out of his chair and put on his suit jacket to go with Amanda.

"Why?" Chris asked defiantly. "She didn't ask for him. She asked for us". Fin watched from his desk, interested in how this was about to play out. Olivia was trying not let her dislike for the newbie be so obvious but it was apparent in her body language that she wanted the girl out of the way.

"You're new. I'm just trying not to overwhelm you" she said. What she really wanted to say was she didn't want her to screw this up.

"I'm not overwhelmed. Not even a little bit". Olivia was staring her down but Chris didn't flinch under her gaze. She wasn't intimidated and she wanted to make sure Olivia knew it.

"Liv, we're all good" Amanda said trying to ease the tension. "I'll keep an eye on her". She turned and tapped Chris lightly on the shoulder with the back of her hand, "Come on. Let it go" she whispered. Chris held her stare as she took her glasses off her head and put them on her face before turning and walking with Rollins out of the squad room. They stepped onto the elevator and Amanda hit the button to take them to the first floor. Chris leaned against the wall as they rode down, "Still think she just needs to warm up to me?" she asked. The doors opened and she stepped out, not even waiting for Amanda to respond to her. Rollins shook her head, "This is gonna be interesting" she said to herself as she walked off the elevator and out of the building.

**Spanish-English Translation **

**¿Cuántos años tienes?- **How old are you?

**Dieciseis- **Sixteen

**Tengo una hermana de tu edad- **I have a sister about your age

**Asi que lo que- **So what

**Mira chica, estamos aquí para usted. Los dos sabemos que si se va a salir, te lo hubieras hecho antes de llegar aquí. Así que ¿por qué no se le cae la actitud y responder a nuestras preguntas, ok?"- **Look girl, we're here for you. We both know that if you were going to leave, you wouldv'e done it before we got here. So why don't you drop the attitude and answer our questions, ok?

**Por que no?- **Why not?

**No hasta que mi digas por que no quiere que los oficiales que lo lleve- **Not until you tell me why you don't want the officers to drive you.

**Por que no puedes contestar a mi pregunta?- **Why can't you just answer my question?


	3. Chapter 3: First Victim Interview

Chapter 3: First Victim Interview

Amanda and Chris returned to the squad room with Ariana and set her up in the interview room across from Cragen's office. They gathered in Cragen's office to assess where they were and what the next steps were going to be. It'd already been ten hours since the rape. There was no telling how many people had been in and out of that house and who'd been in the room since the incident. He didn't know how much evidence had been lost but he didn't want to risk losing anymore so he sent Amaro to meet CSU to process the scene. The others decided to wait to hear the rest of what Ariana had to say about what happened to her and then start questioning witnesses.

"I think Chris should take the lead" Amanda said as they discussed how to proceed. Two things surprised her: first was that Rollins had called her Chris and second was that she suggested she lead an interview with the victim. She really had no idea what she was doing. Rollins knew that but she figured they'd never know what Reyes could do if they didn't give her the opportunity to show them.

"Uh, are we sure that's a good idea?" Olivia asked. She was also surprised by Rollins' suggestion.

"She already has repor with her. She's speaks Spanish..." Amanda started rattling off reasons why she thought Reyes should lead the interview.

"Yeah, so do I" Olivia said, obviously opposed to Reyes taking point. If it was up to her, she wouldn't be in the room at all.

"Ariana likes her" Amanda said ignoring Olivia's smart comment.

"What do you think, Reyes?" Cragen asked. She was a little caught off guard by him asking her opinion.

"Uhhh" she shrugged, "Yeah. I can...I can do it" she said.

Cragen nodded his head, "Alright. It's settled then. You go on in and we'll watch through the two-way" he said. Olivia shut her eyes and shook her head from side to side.

"If you have something to say, why don't you just say it" Chris said. She was tired of the smart ass comments and slick gestures from Olivia. She knew she had a problem with her and she wanted her to come right out and tell her. Amanda and Fin braced themselves for the argument that was about to happen.

"Ok. I don't think you're ready for this" Olivia said looking Chris in the eyes. "You don't know what you're doing. One wrong word and she could stop talking and then we have nothing".

"And what, it's guaranteed that if you or Rollins or Tutuola goes in there that you'll say the right thing? I get that this job is important to you and you don't think I'm up for it but you're wrong. I can do this job". Fin was impressed with the rookie and how well she stood her ground. A lot of other women on the job who crossed paths with Liv were intimidated by her. Chris was the second woman he'd met who wasn't; the first was Amanda. "I can talk to her. I talk to one just like her everyday when I go home. I could talk to her in my sleep" she said confidently. "That might not be true for the next victim that walks through those doors...but it is for her". They stood quietly and waited for Olivia to come back with a rebuttal but she had none. After a moment of silence, Captain Cragen spoke up, "Ok then. Reyes, it's on you".

Chris turned and walked through the door from Cragen's office into the interview room. She sat her notepad and pen on the table and pulled out the chair across from Ariana to sit down. "Took you long enough" she smart alecked. She was wearing sweats and a t shirt they'd given her at the hospital and her hair was still wet from her shower. She looked miserable and exhausted and completely annoyed.

"What'd I say about the attitude?" she said. She planned on talking to her the same way she talked to her sister. She always got everything she wanted to know out of her, sometimes more.

"Well, it's true. I've been sitting here waiting for like an hour".

Chris rolled her eyes, "Stop being so dramatic. It's only been fifteen minutes" she said. She pulled her phone from her pocket and slid it across the table to her. Ariana looked confused as to what she wanted her to do with it. "Dial your parents number". The color drained from her face and she looked terrified.

"I can't tell them" she said, her voice quivering.

"Yes, you can". Chris was confident that all she needed was a little encouragement and she would be able to talk to her parents on her own. Ariana picked up the phone, dialed the number and put the phone up to her ear. Her mother answered the phone and she softly said hi then started to cry. Ariana opened her mouth to say something else but nothing came out. Chris took the phone from her and talked to her mother. She told her that Ariana was at the police station. She assured her that she wasn't in any trouble but that she could come down to talk to her in person. Once Mrs. Soto told her that she and her husband were on their way she hung up the phone and sat it down on the table.

"You're gonna tell them, right?" she asked.

Chris shook her head, "No. You're gonna tell them".

"But you said you would talk to them for me" she said getting angry.

"No, I said I would help you talk to them. And I will" she added. "We'll worry about that when they get here". She opened her notepad and clicked the top of her pen so she was ready to write. "Right now, we need to talk about what happened last night".

Ariana slouched down in her chair, "I already told you and the other detective everything" she said defiantly.

"Well, tell me again". Every time she gave Chris attitude, Chris gave it right back to her. "You were downstairs in the living room. There was music, dancing, what else?" she said prompting her to begin.

"Raquel gave me a drink. I asked her what it was and she said jungle juice. I'd never had it before. I don't drink but I didn't want to seem lame in front of everyone so I took it and started to drink it. It was good. It didn't taste like there was any alcohol or anything in it". Chris listened intently as Ariana recounted the events of the night to her again. She could feel Benson, Rollins, Tutuola and Captain Cragen watching her through the window and it made her a little uncomfortable. She put those feelings to the side to focus on what Ariana was saying. "I was only half way through my second cup when I started to feel weird. The room was moving and there were white spots in my eyes. I told Raquel that I wasn't feeling good and she said I could lay down in her room".

"Where is her room?" Chris asked interrupting her.

"Ummm...it's the second door up the stairs, next to the bathroom" she answered.

"Ok. What happened after you went to lay down?". Ariana's eyes were darting all over the room. She wouldn't for the life of her make eye contact with Reyes.

"I told you...I felt someone on top of me..." she started to get a little sass in her voice.

"Attitude adjustment" she said cutting her off. Ariana took a deep breath to calm herself before continuing.

"I felt someone on top of me. He was touching my hair and holding my arms over my head". Her voice started to shake but she kept controlling her breathing so that she didn't start crying again.

"You said at the hospital that he was gentle" Chris said interrupting her again.

"Yeah" she said in agreement.

"How was he gentle? Describe for me what he did" she said wanting to get more detail.

"He was smoothing my hair, softly like...like my mom does sometimes. And he held me down but not hard. His grip on my wrists wasn't that tight". Chris took notes on everything Ariana described about her attack. "What else?" she asked encouraging her to continue.

"He started to pull a little harder and hold me down more. I didn't know what was happening. It seemed like a dream" she said a little dazed. "But I don't know, it was just...gentle" she said. "He pulled your hair and held you down but he was gentle?"

"Yeah. It was like a light tug, you know, like...you know" she said not wanting to explain any further.

"No, actually, I don't".

Ariana rolled her eyes, "It was like someone would pull your hair if you wanted them to. Not hard just...a little tug" she said not knowing how else to explain it.

Chris raised her eyebrows and shook her head, "Whatever" she whispered, "keep going. What happened next?" Olivia cringed when she heard Reyes say "whatever" to the girl. She couldn't believe that they were allowing her to question a victim on her own on only her second day. She just kept quiet and continued to listen to Ariana through the speaker.

"I was kind of in a fog. It was like it was all happening in slow motion. There are pieces missing now" she said sadly.

"Just tell me everything you can remember" Chris said nicely.

"He tried to kiss me but I moved out of the way. I tried to get up but he held me down harder. Ummm...I tried to yell. I don't know if I yelled at him or if I yelled for help but I just remember yelling. That's when he got mad, hit me in the face. I don't know how I got all these" she said touching the scrapes on her face and her slip lip, "or the ones on my legs. It's all blank. I could just feel how heavy he was on top of me and how hot his breath was on my face. I just shut my eyes". A few tears escaped her eyes as she talked about her ordeal. She just wanted this whole thing to be over.

In the Captain's office there was a knock at the door and an officer stuck his head in, "You wanted to know when the victims parent's got here" he said, implying they had arrived. "Tell them we'll be right with them" Cragen directed the officer. He nodded his head and ducked back out of the office.

"Please tell me that Amanda is going to stay in the room now" Olivia said from behind the mirror".

Why?" Fin asked. "Reyes seems to be doing a good job to me" he said.

"Because this is exactly why she got tossed from homicide. You remember what she said. She was too insensitive".

Fin nodded his head, "Yeah, I did. I also heard her say that she's had a lot of sensitivity training". He understood Olivia's nervousness about the situation but at the same time he wasn't for the hand-holding that she wanted.

"Oh, come on, Fin. The girl's a walking ball of sarcasm. She didn't mean that. She just said whatever to her. They don't teach that in sensitivity training". Olivia couldn't believe that they were all willing to let Chris off her leash so soon.

"Alright, enough" Cragen said jumping in. "Rollins stay in the room" he said. Olivia let out a relieved breath and turned back to the window. Amanda left to get the girl's parents and take them to their daughter.

Ariana was still trying to piece together more details of her assault when there was a knock at the door and Amanda stuck here head in. "Ariana, your parents are here". She stepped aside and let Mr. and Mrs. Soto walk in past her. Mrs. Soto rushed over to their daughter and wrapped her in hug.

"Are you alright, mija?" her mother asked. "I'm fine, mama" she said back.

"You must be Detective Reyes" her father said addressing Christina. She stood up from her chair and extended her hand, "I am" she said. She shook his hand and then her mother's and asked them to sit down. Amanda sat next to her and nodded for her to continue the interview.

"Mr. and Mrs. Soto, Ariana has something she needs to tell you". She turned to look at the girl, "Go ahead". Ariana just stared at her parents with her mouth open, unable to form any words.

"Well, what is it?" her father asked. Both Ariana and her mother winced and Chris knew immediately why Ariana was so afraid to talk to her parents. Her father's tone was harsh and his body was intimidating, especially to a teenage girl. "It's ok, mija. You can tell us" her mother said reaching up to touch her hair. Ariana relaxed into her mother's touch but flinched when her father brought his hand up and rested it on the back of her chair. Amanda recognized her reaction immediately and though this was all new to Chris, she quickly put together that it wasn't just a result of her assault. Mrs. Soto looked her daughter over more attentively and realized what she was wearing. "Where are your clothes?" she asked confused.

"What the hell is going on here?" Mr. Soto asked impatiently. "Is my daughter under arrest for something?"

"No" Chris said simply, "As I told your wife on the phone, Ariana isn't in any trouble". She was getting annoyed with his abrasive stance and was ready to take him down a notch if stepped out of line.

He abruptly stood up from his chair, "Then I'm taking my daughter home". He grabbed her by the arm and pulled her up out of her chair. Both Chris and Amanda rose from their chairs as he tried to pull his wife and daughter towards the door. Ariana started to cry and Chris realized she'd have to step in for her.

She stepped in front of him and held a hand up to stop him, "Mr. Soto your daughter is trying to tell you something. Your tone and impatience isn't helping her do that. You need to let go of her arm and sit back down so that she can tell you why you were called down here". Amanda stood beside Chris to be supportive but kept quiet and let her try to get a handle on the situation.

"She just had the opportunity to talk and she didn't say anything" he said angrily.

"Well, I wonder why that is" she said sarcastically.

"What are you trying to say?" he asked getting more angry.

"I'm not _trying_ to say anything. I'm _saying_ that the behavior you're showing right now is most likely the same behavior you show her all the time which is why she was terrified to have you brought down here. I'm guessing when she wants to talk, you're not the one she goes to. I know this because when I told her to call her parents she automatically dialed her mother. Not the home number, her direct cell, probably because she didn't want to risk you answering the phone and having to explain why she's calling from a police station. She cringes at the sound of your voice which is understandable, it is a bit harsh. But an even bigger tell is the way she flinched when you put your hand on her chair, yet she relaxes into her mother's touch". Amanda was impressed by everything Reyes had managed to catch in the time she'd spent with Ariana and in the short time that her parents were in the room. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that, watching from behind the glass, Olivia was impressed too. "It was far too easy for you to grab her arm and pull her from her chair which tells me that you do it quite often. Lucky for her, I'm in the room this time. You're not leaving. The first thing you're going to do is let go of her arm". He hesitantly released his grip from Ariana's arm and waited for Chris to continue. "Now, you're going to sit down and listen to what Ariana has to say. Now, I know it'll be hard for you because habits are hard to break but while she's talking...you _will not _interrupt her. You will sit quietly and you will listen". After she'd effectively reduced his ego from the size of the globe to the pit of a peach, she gestured for him to retake his seat.

Ariana stood there in shock. She couldn't believe that she'd just talked to her father like that. She met her eyes and Chris gave her an encouraging nod before going over and sitting back down next to Amanda. Knowing that she had Detective Reyes on her side it was easier for Ariana to tell her parents about what happened to her the night before. Her mother cried and hugged her and her father just sat there with a steel expression on his face, trying hard not show any emotion. Once her parents knew the situation, Chris, with Ariana's permission, continued her interview with her parent's present. She held on to her mother's hand as she told Chris and Amanda everything she could remember about what happened. When they'd asked all their questions and answered all of Ariana's and her parent's, they told them they could take their daughter home. Chris told Ariana that she could call her day or night, no matter what time it was, if she needed anything. She gave a card to her mother as well and repeated the same before the Sotos walked out of the precinct.

Amanda and Chris went back to the Captain's office to see that Nick had returned from the house. He'd come in just in time to see Reyes handle Mr. Soto and he couldn't deny that he was impressed. He gave them the run down of his trip to the house with CSU. It definitely looked like their had been a party in the house. When he got there, nothing had been cleaned up and there were people still passed out on the floor, couches and stairs. Nobody even knew that Ariana had left. That was good news in regards to the preservation of the crime scene. Raquel hadn't slept in her room so everything was still as it was when Ariana and the perp left. There was blood on the bed and floor and traces of semen on the sheets. They also found vomit on the floor. Rollins and Reyes mentioned that Ariana didn't say anything about throwing up so there was a possibility that it came from her rapist. They got a call from the lab confirming the presence of fluids on the rape kit and GHB in her system. Now that they had her statement and had confirmed that she was drugged they were ready to start questioning witnesses.

They started by bringing in Monte and Raquel Ramos. Since Raquel was a minor and had been the one to give Ariana her drinks they called their parents home from their vacation. They would need to sit in on the interview with Raquel. While they waited for the parents to show, Nick and Fin took a shot at Monte. They got a list of everyone who was at the party and took a DNA swab and sent it off to the to be compared to the rape kit. He gave it voluntarily so they were pretty sure he wasn't their guy. Mr. and Mrs. Ramos arrived shortly after they finished questioning Monte and were not happy to find out that their kids had hosted a party where a girl was raped. They brought them to the interview room with Raquel and Olivia and Amanda questioned her about the drinks she'd given Ariana. She said she wasn't the one that made them. Someone made them for her and she gave them to Ariana. She gave them the name of the guy who made the drinks, "Mike something" she said. She couldn't remember his last name. Nick went back to the list the brother had given him and found who they were looking for: Mike Landry, a buddy of his from the car lot where he worked. The DNA came back from the lab and cleared Monte as a suspect. They decided not to arrest him for giving alcohol to minors but let him go with a stern warning. They figured the wrath of mama Ramos was enough punishment for the both of them.


	4. Chapter 4: First Interrogation

Chapter 4: First Interrogation

They hauled in everyone on the list and all of them offered up their DNA without hesitation. The last person and best lead was Mike Landry and he was nowhere to be found. They went to his apartment, his job, and his parents house and came up with nothing. It was nearing six thirty and they were about to call it a night when they got a call from Monte saying that he'd gotten in touch with Mike. He said he'd found his phone at his house and was on his to come get it. Fin, Rollins and Reyes got in a sedan and went to the hotel the Ramos family was staying in. They got there just as he was leaving and hopped out the car to arrest him. Of course, he tried to run but Fin was able to cut him off with the car. They cuffed him, read him his rights and hauled him down to the station where they argued about whether it was a good idea to bring Ariana in for a line up. The DA arrived and they hoped he could settle the argument.

"ADA Barba, Detective Reyes" Cragen said doing the introductions.

They shook hands, "Rafael", he said with a light smile. "Chris".

"Ok, so where are we with this guy?" Barba asked, walking over to the mirror to get a closer look at the suspect.

"Mike Landry, twenty four, works at a car lot doing repossessions" Fin said giving Barba the skinny on their suspect.

"Criminal record?"

"Small stuff" Rollins said opening her file on the guy, "A couple of arrests for petty theft for stealing from some of the cars at his job. Nothing violent, nothing sexual involving minors or otherwise. There is an ex-girlfriend who tried to bring rape charges against him but she dropped it when she was told there wasn't enough to make the case" she said.

"He got another job at a car lot after stealing from cars?" Barba asked confused.

"Well, he was a minor so he spent a little time in juvenile detention and his record was expunged when he turned eighteen on the condition he stay out of trouble" she explained.

"What else?"

"Witnesses confirm that he was the one that made the jungle juice for the party and Raquel named him as the one that made the drinks to give to the vic" Olivia said chiming in.

"Raquel is...?" he asked.

"Ariana, the victim's, best friend. It was her brother Monte's party. He turned twenty one and told her she could invite a few friends so she wouldn't tell their parents, who were out of town, that he was using their house for his birthday bash".

Barba nodded his understanding, "And the girl, the victim, uhhh, Ariana...she ID him?"

"That's what we were just debating" Reyes said jumping into the conversation. "She was drugged, lab found traces of GHB in her system, so her memory isn't all there. She says it was dark, she closed her eyes, didn't get a look at his face. I wouldn't count on her being able to pick him out" she said. She and Amanda both thought it was a bad idea to do the line-up. Olivia and Nick thought they should give it a try. They thought maybe seeing him would jog her memory but Chris didn't want to risk it. Fin was indifferent. It didn't matter to him how they made the case as long as they did it legally and made it stick.

"You don't have much confidence in her, do you?" Barba asked looking at Chris.

She walked over and leaned against the two-way window, "We went over it over and over again. She couldn't give any details about him. She could barely remember half of what happened during the rape. The girl's got holes in her memory the size of the holes in my sister's jeans" she said. Barba's eyebrows raised at Reyes' sense of humor. "If you want to put him in a line-up, that's your deal, but I talked to her and I'm telling you she won't remember him".

"Ok" Barba said deciding to move on from the topic of a line-up, "What about physical evidence?". It was Nick's turn to add something to the discussion.

"Blood on the sheets and floor is a match to Ariana. There was also semen present and vomit on the floor. We checked, the vomit's not from Ariana or any of the other party goers so it has to be the perps. All the other males at the party offered up their DNA, we ran 'em all against the kit and no dice". He pointed at the two-way window, "He's the last one on the list of people the brother gave us of who was at the party. He's got to be our guy".

"His DNA not in the system from his juvie arrest?" Barba asked.

"It was but when his records were expunged his parents and the big shot lawyer they hired made sure that everything that came with it, including fingerprints and DNA, was wiped from the system" Rollins explained. "They didn't want any chance that it could have a negative effect on his future" she finished.

"It pays in soooo many ways to be rich" Chris said.

"Tell me about it" Fin said.

"I can't. I'm not rich" she answered sarcastically.

"I didn't mean...I mean it's just a..." Chris smiled and Fin rolled his eyes. "You can't ever just be serious, can you?" he asked.

"Well, you know" she said with a little shrug and a chuckle.

"Alright. Let's hold off on the line-up; see if you can get him to hang himself. I don't want to risk her not being able to ID him and then it be admissible at trial" he said.

Cragen nodded, "Alright. Sounds good to me" he said. "Amaro...and Reyes" he said turning to his new detective, "you take the interrogation". Nick stood up and walked over to the door to the interview room.

"I thought you said I just had to get my feet wet? I'm soaked over here" she said walking over by Amaro.

"Just say the word and I'll send Rollins instead" he said smirking at her joke.

"Nope. I'm good boss". She turned to Amaro, "After you" she said gesturing for him to head in. He opened the door and walked into the room with the suspect and she followed behind him.

"Well, she's...different" Barba noted as the door to the interview room closed.

"Oh, you have no idea" Cragen said agreeing with him.

Amaro and Reyes sat down across from the suspect and stared at him. He stared directly at Reyes as if Amaro wasn't even in the room. She was careful to control her facial expressions. She didn't want him to think that he had any affect on her whatsoever. Soon his straight face turned to a smirk and he looked down at his hands that rested on the table.

"She always so serious?" he asked finally looking at Amaro. Nick ignored him and just continued to stare, same as Reyes. They wanted him to know that they controlled when the conversation would start and what it would be about. "¿Por qué no sonríes para mí la miel?" he said. He was tying to sound sexy but his pronunciation was horrible. Amaro almost laghed but was able to hold his stare. Chris got up from her chair and walked around the table to stand behind him. She put her arms around him so that her hands rested on the table.

"Let's set a few ground rules, ok? First, don't ever call me honey. Second" she slammed her knee into the back of his chair, "sit up straight. Third, speak english. You're embarrassing yourself". She opened a folder sitting on the table, pulled out a picture and sat it in front of him before walking back around to her chair and sitting down.

"Ariana Soto" she said. She kept her steady glare and waited for a response.

He scratched his head, "I'm sorry. Who?"

"The sixteen year old girl you drugged and raped last night at your buddy Monte's twenty first birthday party" Nick said jumping in.

Mike shook his head, "No, I didn't rape anybody. You got the wrong guy" he said.

Chris shrugged her shoulder, "Ok. So just give us a DNA sample and we can clear this whole thing up" she said looking over at Nick who shook his head in agreement.

"A DNA sample?" he asked as if he didn't know what it was.

"Yeah" Chris said annoyed with his innocent act, "a DNA sample. You remember what that is, right? You had to give one when you were arrested for...what was it, again?" she asked looking at Nick.

"Stealing from cars on his uncle's repo lot" he said, pretending to remind her.

"That's right. He did you a favor by giving you job at his lot after school. You bagged up people's belongings for them when their cars were impounded, only they didn't get all their stuff back, did they? That's a pretty ungrateful attitude there, Mikey" she said.

"Whatever. I was a kid then. Doesn't mean I raped anybody" he said.

"We talked to your ex-girlfriend, Elena. She told us that she dumped your ass because she found nude pictures of herself on your phone. Pictures that she doesn't remember posing for" Nick said leaning forward with his elbows on the table.

"She was young too. Only seventeen. You like 'em young and latin, huh, Mike?" Reyes said a little flirty. "Is that why you were so excited when Monte invited you to his party? You were hoping to find some nice, young Latinas to prey on?"

"I didn't do anything wrong. Elena got drunk and didn't remember taking the pictures. That's not my fault".

Nick stood up and slammed his hand down on the table, "She was seventeen years old!" he yelled. He got up and walked around the table, "You got her drunk and you took advantage of her!" he yelled in his face.

Mike started to get flustered, "No, that's not true. She wanted to have a good time. I helped her do that" he said shrinking away from Amaro. Chris got up from her chair and joined Nick on the other side of the table.

"Oh, you helped her alright. You drugged her, didn't you? You drugged her and raped her and then kept a parting gift for yourself" Chris said towering over him on the side opposite Amaro. "You couldn't help yourself, could you? You needed those pictures. You needed to..." she paused as if a thought came over her. "You needed to relive the moment...over and over again". Her volume trailed off and she stood up straight. She walked from behind him and stood at his side. She looked down at his pants pockets and didn't see any indication of anything in his pockets. "Stand up" she commanded. He slowly stood from his chair and she walked around to look at his back pockets. _"Empty" _she thought to herself. "Sit down". He slowly sat back down, unsure of what she was thinking. She walked over to the door leading to Captain Cragen's office. "Come on, Nick. We don't need this guy" she opened the door and left the interview room. Nick picked up the folder and followed her out of the room.

"Why'd you do that?" he asked confused as to why she pulled them out. "We had him. He was about to crack" he said slapping the folder down on Cragen's desk. "I think he already did" she said.

"What are you thinking?" Cragen asked. Clearly, she felt like she was on to something.

"He was in the wind. We couldn't find him. He would've gotten away with it. So why come back?". She already knew the answer but she wanted get everyone on her thought train.

"Monte called him and told him he had his phone" Fin said answering her.

"Yeah, but if you were trying to duck a rape charge would you go back to the city where cops are looking for you to get a phone?"

"Nah. I'd just get a new one" he said.

"Exactly. So it wasn't the phone that he came back for. He could get a new phone so there must be something on his phone that's irreplaceable" she said hoping they'd catch on to her thought process.

"Pictures" Rollins said catching on to what Reyes was getting at.

Chris nodded her head, "He took pictures of Ariana before he raped her, just like he did to Elena, but this time he lost his phone. Hours later, when he wanted to relive what he did, he couldn't. He needed those pictures. So he came back but he didn't count on Monte ratting him out" she explained.

"We need to find that phone" Benson said.

"Is that enough?" she asked turning to Barba. He looked as if he didn't understand her question. "We have everyone who says he made the drinks for the party, Raquel who can testify that he made the drinks specifically for Ariana and when we find his phone..."

"You mean _if _you find his phone" Barba said interrupting her.

"When we find his phone" she repeated, "we'll have the pictures. Is that enough to compel a DNA sample?" she asked clarifying her earlier question.

"I'd feel better if he had priors" he said rubbing his forehead.

"What about Elena?" she asked.

He shook his head, "There was no arrest. That's not helpful" he said dismissing the idea.

"She tried. She went to the police but they couldn't charge him. She didn't find the pictures until weeks later so any evidence of the drugs or the rape was gone and of course she had no memory of it but that's not the point" she said stopping herself from rambling.

"Oh, you have a point?" Barba asked smirking at her.

"Of course I do. I always have a point. We have Elena, seventeen, Latina, drugged, raped, pictures. Ariana, sixteen, Latina, drugged, raped, pictures. She proves a pattern of behavior; establishes his MO" she said finally getting to her point.

Barba nodded his head, "Ok, I could work that. This ex-girlfriend, she'd be willing to testify?"

Reyes shrugged her shoulders, "I don't see why not?" she said.

"That's not a yes, detective" he said looking at her sideways.

"Ok. Say she agrees to testify. Can you make that enough for the DNA swab?" she asked.

"Without a doubt" he said confidently. Without another word, Chris walked out of Cragen's office and over to her desk. She pulled out her notepad and found Elena Delano's phone number and called her. Everyone watched through the office window as she sat at her desk on her phone.

"Where'd you find this girl?" Barba asked looking at Captain Cragen.

"The stork dropped her off" he quipped.

"I'd hazard a guess that she drinks as much caffeine as I do" he said looking at her through the window.

"More...with lots of sugar" Rollins said.

"Where's she from?"

"California" Amaro said jumping in. "Don't stare so hard, counselor. You're not her type" he joked. Barba turned and glared at him and everyone else laughed. Chris walked back into Cragen's office.

"We got her. She'll testify" she said referring to Mike Landry's ex.

"Ok. Find the pictures. I'll start working on the court order" he said grabbing his brief case and heading towards the door. He stopped and turned to look at Reyes, "Good work, Detective" he said. She gave a light nod and he walked out of the office.

"So, what are the chances we'll find his phone at the house?" Fin asked. "CSU's already been over the place. Do we think they missed it?".

Nick shook his head, "Not a chance. We lifted every surface and looked in all the nooks and crannies. No cell phone" he said.

"Maybe it was somewhere else in the house. I mean, how thorough were they in the rest of the place?" Reyes asked.

"Well, we mainly focused on the best friend's room since that's were the rape took place but we went through every room" he said.

"Well, go back. All of you. Find it" Cragen said.

They all left his office, grabbed their jackets and headed over to the Ramos' house. They searched the place from top to bottom but didn't find the phone. It was getting late and they were running out of ideas. Olivia, Nick, Fin and Amanda were ready to pack it in but Chris wasn't ready to give up yet. She paced back and forth across the living room trying to think of where the phone could be. Then it hit her.

"Monte" she said aloud. "Monte called him and told him he had his phone. He was leaving the hotel when we got there" she said.

"Yeah, so, what's your point?" Amaro asked annoyed. He was tired and couldn't think straight anymore. He just wanted to go home, get some sleep, and start again with a clear head in the morning.

"So, my point is that either Monte lied and told Landry he had his phone so he'd come to the hotel for us to arrest him or..."

"Or he did have his phone and gave it back to him. Which would mean Landry had his phone when he left the hotel" Rollins said following Reyes thought process. Reyes had a feeling that she was really going to like Rollins. They seemed to be on the same wavelength most of the time. She was looking forward to continuing working with her.

"Yes, but his pockets were empty. So between the hotel and the station, he lost the phone again" she said.

"Great, so it could be anywhere" Liv said sounding just as annoyed as Nick.

"No, it has to be outside the hotel" she corrected.

"We patted him down before we put him in the sedan and he had nothing in his pockets" Fin said chiming in. "It must have fallen out when I hit him with the car".

They left the house and went to the hotel to find the phone. They looked around outside for a few minutes until Rollins thought to go inside and ask the front desk if anyone had turned in a phone. Sure enough, valet found the phone and gave it to the front desk. She took the phone and looked through the picture gallery and hit the jack pot. They called Barba and told him they found the phone and the pictures were there, just as Reyes had suspected. He sounded pleased and told them he'd put the finishing touches on his DNA request and they'd have the court order by the morning. Just like that, they had him. They went back to the station to log the phone into evidence and check in with the Captain. He commended them on their work, especially Reyes, and told them to go home and get some sleep.

They gathered their things and headed for the elevators. Chris' phone rang and she pulled it from her pocket and answered it. She tried to quietly argue with whoever was on the other end but in the enclosed space of the elevator, it was impossible for them not to hear her. "Ok. I'm on my way home. I'm on my wa...I'm hanging up. I don't care. What!?" she yelled suddenly startling everyone. "¿Sabes qué, no me importa. Sí, eso es lo que dije. Go to bed. I'm hanging up. Bye". She hung up the phone and let out a harsh sigh. She closed her eyes and let her head fall back on the wall of the elevator. A second later, they reached their floor and the doors opened. They filed out of the elevator and out the precinct doors to the parking lot. Reyes offered Rollins a ride home and she gladly accepted.

Olivia stopped them on the way to her car, "Hey, Reyes" she called after her. Chris turned to see who'd called her name. Olivia walked over to where she and Rollins had stopped, "Listen, I know I've given you a hard time but I just wanted to tell you...good job today. You did excellent work" she said complimenting. Rollins looked at Chris as she was about to say something. She had a feeling that nothing but sarcasm was about to come out of her mouth.

"Just...say thank you" she said stopping her from ruining the moment. Chris smiled, "Thank you" she said softly. Olivia gave a small laugh and nodded her head before turning and walking to her car. Chris and Amanda did the same and they all headed home for the night.

**Spanish- English Translation**

**¿Por qué no sonríes para mí la miel? **- Why don't you smile for me, honey.

**¿Sabes qué, no me importa. Sí, eso es ****lo que dije**- You know what, I don't care. Yes, that's what I said.


	5. Chapter 5: Fast Friends

Chapter 5: Fast Friends

The next morning they came in Barba had made good his word for the DNA sample. They swabbed Landry and sent the sample off the lab. It came back an hour later that it was a match to the fluids on the bedsheet and the rape kit. They sent him off to booking and worked up the paperwork to hand the case over to the DA. Ariana called Chris fives times throughout the day. She tried to be patient with her but the girl needed more attention than she was used to giving. They were getting close to calling it a night when Chris got another call, this time from Ariana's mother.

"Señora Soto, más despacio. No puedo entender" she said into the phone. Mrs. Soto was hysterical and nothing Chris was saying was helping to calm her down. "Señora, Señora. No, no, no, no. I...please". By now she had the intention of almost everyone in the squad room. "Por favor. Necesito que te calmes y que me escuches. Vete a casa y esperar allí. Voy a encontrarla. ¿Entiendes? Encontraré Ariana". She hung up with Mrs. Soto and immediately dialed Ariana's number.

"Hey, what's going on?" Olivia asked.

"Ariana didn't come home from school. Her mother called and they said she never showed up" she said as she waited for an answer. The call went to voicemail so she hung up and called her again. When the call went to voicemail again she tried calling Raquel. She talked to her for a few minutes but she swore she didn't know where Ariana was and that she hadn't talked to her since the night of the party. She hung up with her and tried Ariana again. This time a boy answered the phone.

"Who is this?" she asked. He was laughing and slurring his words and not even attempting to answer her question. "Put Ariana on the phone" she said. She was past her limit with this girl. _"I guess this is what Benson meant about knowing how to deal with victims" _she thought to herself. "Ariana where the hell are you?" she asked. "Chill...Ariana, don't tell me to chill out. Where are you?" she asked her again. "Stay there. I'm coming to get you". She got up and started to put her jacket on. "Ariana, if you're not there when I get there I promise you're gonna wish you never met me, do you understand? Don't go anywhere. I'm on my way". She hung up the phone, grabbed her gun from her desk drawer and her keys. Rollins walked over to her desk.

"Hey, you want to some back up?" she asked. Chris didn't know why she was always being so friendly. Olivia and Nick had pretty much written her off on her first day and Fin hadn't shown that he felt one way or another. But Rollins had been in her corner from the start. She thought that maybe Amanda was interested in her but she wasn't for dating coworkers. She'd seen it happen and it never ended well. At any rate, if she wanted to tag along she wouldn't say no. "Uh, sure. Yeah" she said. They walked out together to go find Ariana.

They found her sitting on the stoop of a house with another girl and a couple of guys. All of them were at least five years older than her. They had no business hanging out with her on a school night and giving her alcohol. They searched all of them and found marijuana on the girl and a small bag of cocaine on each of the guys. Amanda called in for back up and had all of them taken in. Chris called Ariana's parents and told them to meet her at the station to take Ariana home. She ripped her a new one for skipping school and worrying her mother half to death. She gave her water to try to sober her up and left her in the interview room in tears. Olivia was furious with how she'd handled the situation with the girl.

"Reyes" she came over to her fuming, "What the hell were you thinking? You don't talk to her like that. She's a victim" she said angrily.

"She's a teenager who skipped school, stayed out all day without calling her parents, and got drunk with a bunch of idiots she barely knows. Not to mention she got on my nerves all day. She's needs to know that I won't put up with it. Otherwise she'll just keep doing this over and over again" she said.

"Ok, the figurative heavy hand might've worked for you before but it's obviously not working anymore. She's a regular kid, who's scared and traumatized and she's having feelings of shame and guilt. She needs someone on her side to tell her that the rape wasn't her fault and that she can get through this. She doesn't need you yelling at her about what a screw up she is and...". By this point in her rant, Olivia was practically yelling.

"Ok, ok, ok. I got it" Reyes said shrugging out of her jacket. She unclipped her gun from her hip and returned it to her drawer. "I will talk to her. I'll...apologize". She pulled out her chair and sat down.

Olivia looked at her sideways, "Ummm...you just said you would go talk to her. Why are you sitting down?" she asked.

"Oh, I can't talk to her now with the crying and all. I'll just give her some time to calm down" she said logging into her laptop. "Reyes, get in there right. now." Olivia said flexing her authority. Chris let out a heavy sigh and shut her laptop. She got up from her chair and dragged herself over to the interview room to talk to Ariana. She opened the door and got the biggest death stare she'd ever gotten from anyone. She ignored it and pulled a chair around to sit down next to the teenager.

"Go away" she said still crying. "I don't want to talk to you". She hiccupped and sniffled and her hand shook as she held on to the cup of water that Chris had given her a while earlier.

"Ok, then you can just listen" Reyes said. She tried to soften her voice to let Ariana know that she wasn't there to come down on her again. "I'm sorry. I know this hard and..." Ariana was determined to be stubborn and test Chris to see if she was really sorry about what she'd said.

"No, you're not. You think I'm a stupid kid; that I'm a screw up. You think what happened to me was my fault" she yelled. She still had tears streaming down her face but she'd gotten control of her breathing and stopped sniffling. "It was, wasn't it? I shouldn't have taken those drinks. I was so stupid. And that's what you think too". Chris felt horrible that she made Ariana feel like the assault was her fault.

"Ariana that's not true. I don't think you're stupid. You're young and you just wanted to fit in and there's nothing wrong with that. Nothing you did that night was wrong, do you understand? This didn't happen because of anything you did. This happened because Mike Landry is a predator. Nothing about you or what you did that night would've changed that. Ariana, look at me". She waited but the girl wouldn't meet her eyes. "Please". She still refused to look at her. She just stared at the cup in her hands. "Ok, well just listen to me", she said seeing that she wouldn't give in, "This is going to be hard for you. It's gonna be hard for a while to trust people and to know who's on your side and to be confident in yourself and who you are and what you deserve but I want you to know that you are strong and you deserve the very best of everything...and I know that you can get through this. It won't be easy but you _can _get through this and things _will _get better. It might not seem like it now but I promise...it will get better" she said softly.

"No, I can't do this. I can't see him again. I don't want to go to court and talk about what he did to me in front of everyone, in front of my parents. Please I can't". She started sobbing again and Chris was losing her steam. She didn't know what she was doing. She was actually open to the idea of Benson coming in and taking over her but couldn't let her do that. Ariana had reached out to her. It'd been her that she'd opened up to about her assault and her that she'd been calling all day. She couldn't just pass her off to someone else.

"Yes, you can" she said. "You can do it...and I'll be right there with you. You don't have to go through this alone. You're stronger than you think you are. You survived the assault. You can survive the trial and everything that comes after. You cannot let him keep control of your life or make you live in fear. If you do, he wins". Ariana seemed to be listening to what she was saying. She started to calm down and drank the rest of her water.

"You really think I can do it?" she asked.

Chris nodded her head, "I know you can" she said simply. "And whenever you think you can't...you just take a deep breath and tell yourself "Si puedo". A small smile crossed her Ariana's lips and Chris relaxed knowing she'd managed to make the girl feel better. There was a knock on the door and Fin stuck his head, "Parents are here" she said. Reyes nodded and he backed out of the room, leaving the door slightly ajar. Reyes gave Ariana's shoulder a supportive squeeze before standing up and returning her chair to the other side of the table. Ariana stood up and they walked out of the room together. She walked over to her mother who took her in her arms and her father stood there with a stern look on his face.

"Señor Soto, ¿puedo tener un minuto por favor?" They walked over to the stand by the window and from the looks of it Chris was giving him another stern talking to about his attitude. A few minutes later when they returned to the group, Mr. Soto had a softer look on his face.

"You won't be going back to school tomorrow" he said looking at his daughter. "I'll go talk to your teachers, get your work. You don't have to go back until you're ready" he said nicely. Ariana gave a small smile and wrapped him in a hug and he returned it. They said there goodbyes and started to walk out of the squad room. Without any warning, Ariana turned around and ran back to Chris throwing her arms around her neck. Chris was caught completely off guard.

"Oh...ummm...ok" she said hesitantly returning her embrace.

Ariana slowly let go, "Thank you" she said with a shaky voice. Reyes just smiled and nodded her head. Ariana turned and walked out with her parents. After another hour they were calling it quits for the day.

"Hey". Reyes turned around to see Rollins standing next to her desk. "You wanna go get a drink or something" she asked. The thought of Rollins being attracted to her crept back into her mind. She really didn't want to deal with that kind of awkwardness.

"Ummm, I'm really not in the mood for a group drink" she said trying to decline nicely.

"No group" she said, "Just us". Reyes opened her drawer to get her gun out. _"That's even worse" _she thought to herself.

"I..." just as she was about to let Rollins down easy her phone started to ring. She looked at the caller id and saw it was her brother calling. She talked to him for a minute and Rollins got from the tenor of the side of the conversation that she could hear that Reyes had to go home. "I'm sorry. That was my brother. I have to get home" she said.

Rollins nodded her head, "Rain check?" she asked.

"Rain check". Reyes grabbed her bag and headed out the door. Rollins wasn't ready to go home yet so she asked Fin if he wanted to get a beer. He accepted and they left the squad room together.

The next day, Barba came into the squad room to talk to them about the little stunt that Ariana pulled the day before. He wasn't happy with her antics. He understood the "acting out" phase some victims went through but he didn't want her jeopardizing the trial. The defense would use anything they could to undercut her credibility.

"So, how bad was it?" he asked directing the question at Reyes.

"Not that bad" she said shrugging her shoulders.

"Care to elaborate, detective?".

She sat on top of the table in front of the large screen, "Not really". She pulled a piece from her bagel and popped it in her mouth.

Barba was about to say something but Rollins stepped forward, "She skipped school, met some kids while she wandering around the city, and decided to hang out with them. That's all" she said giving the elaboration he was asking for.

"Define hang out" he said.

"They sat on the front stoop of one their houses all day; drinking...maybe smoked a little pot".

Barba rubbed his forehead, "That's just great".

"Yeah, what does any of this have to do with her rape?" Reyes asked confused.

"The defense could use this to argue that she's a wild kid; likes drinking and experimenting with drugs..."

Chris rolled her eyes, "Oh please don't tell me y'all use that "pot is the gateway drug" argument out here" she said sitting her bagel on the table.

"It's just a way for the defense to throw dirt on her character" he said.

"Yeah. They don't have to believe their own drivel. They just have to sell it to a jury" Fin said clearly not a fan of defense tactics.

"Ok, that's cool. What does her character have to with her rape?" she said clearly not understanding the problem.

"Juries are less likely to believe victims that have a less than spotless background" Barba explained.

"So they don't believe anybody" she said.

"What about the kids she was found with?" Barba asked ignoring Reyes' comment. He didn't think she was taking this serious enough so he directed his questions to the rest of the team.

"Minor drug violations. The girl had the pot, the other two had cocaine. Small amounts, not distribution weight. I'd say they're just users". Chris answered just because she could tell that Barba didn't want to deal with her anymore.

"She couldn't find better kids to skip school with?" he asked a bit sarcastic.

"The "better kids" are the ones who _don't _skip school so probably not" Reyes answered not so sarcastically. Barba was clearly annoyed with her. "Ok, I'm just...listen, clearly I have a lot to learn but come on...you're telling me that a jury isn't gonna believe that she was drugged and raped because she skipped school, for the first time in her life I might add, had a few drinks and smoked pot with some local losers. I mean, doesn't the average teenager do that at least once?"

"This isn't about what the average teenager does. This is about Ariana and convicting her rapist. Her behavior matters. It shouldn't but it does. It's not right but it's reality. I need her behavior to be impeccable for the duration of the trial" he said in very serious tone. Reyes heard him loud and clear.

"I will relay the message" she said. Her tone was clear of any sarcasm so Barba knew she took him seriously.

"Thank you. I'll be calling to set up times with you three" he said gesturing to Reyes, Rollins and Amaro, "to do trial prep. That sarcasm thing you do all the time, not gonna fly with a jury, you understand?" he said looking at Reyes. She wasn't a fan of his fatherly tone but she decided to let it slide this time.

"Come on, juries love me...and my sarcasm". He looked at her sideways and she put her hands up in surrender, "Alright. I'll put it away". Barba turned and walked out of the squad room.

They took a few complaints throughout the rest of the day; two for domestic violence and a couple of suspicions of child abuse. One of the DV victims backed off her complaint but the other stuck it out and the boyfriend was arrested. It was a strong case so, assuming she didn't back out leading up to the trial, they were confident he'd be doing some jail time. The child abuse complaints turned up nothing; just normal injuries that active kids get. Reyes felt like she could last here, even if they didn't exactly like her yet. She had the ability to grow on people so she wasn't too worried. They decided to go out to a bar for some drinks after their shift. They crowded into a booth with Fin and Amanda on one side and Reyes, Amaro and Benson on the other. Reyes bought the first round.

"So, what do you think, rookie? You gonna stick around for a while?" Amaro asked grabbing a beer as the waitress sat it down on the table.

"I think I'm tired of you calling me rookie" she said grabbing a beer of her own and taking a drink. She ignore the second half of his question and waited for someone else to continue the conversation.

"I think you'll do alright here" Fin said, "You handled yourself pretty well on your first case".

Chris took another drink from her beer, "Yeah well, it's not over yet. Still plenty of time for me to screw it up" she joked. Olivia rolled her eyes. As impressed as she was with how Reyes handled the Soto parents and the interrogation with Landry it was all wiped away with how she'd handled Ariana's acting out. She thought she had one thing right: she had a lot of learning to do.

"You'll be fine" Rollins said giving her a small smile. She gave a small smile back but quickly looked away. She didn't want Rollins to think she was flirting with her.

Amanda wasn't at all attracted to women. She'd never even gone through an experimenting phase. She was straight, no doubts in her mind about that. Yet there was something about Reyes that really caught her attention and had her wanting to know more about her. She didn't know what it was but something had her interested. Maybe it was the way she carried herself. She had a certain swag in the way she walked and talked that got everyone's attention. She did it her first day at the precinct, when they went to dinner that first night, and she was doing it now. She had the attention of almost everyone in the bar. She was intriguing for sure and Rollins wanted to know more about her. She seemed to have a lot going on at home and Amanda thought they might have a lot in common outside of work. She wanted to let Reyes know that she could talk to her and it wouldn't hurt to have someone to hang out with when the work day was over.

"I gotta call it a night" Amaro said tapping Reyes on the shoulder. Reyes got up and let him out of the booth. "I'm gonna try to get some skype time with Zara before Maria puts her to bed", he said putting his jacket on.

"I'm gonna go too" Olivia said sliding out of the booth. "Brian just texted and he's on his way home. Haven't really seen him much in a few days with our crazy schedules". She put her jacket on and she and Amaro walked out together. Chris finished her beer and asked if they wanted another round. Rollins said yes. She didn't have anywhere better to be.

"I'll go for one more then I'm gonna get out of here" Fin said. Reyes got another round and Fin filled her in on how to finesse her way into Liv's good graces.

"Thanks for the advice but I honestly don't care about being in her good graces" she said bluntly.

"You sure that's the attitude you want to have?" he asked her. Fin liked her just fine. She seemed like a cool person and she was proving herself to be a good detective. But Olivia wasn't so easy to please. He didn't think that Reyes' attitude was a good one in trying to build a relationship with Olivia, even if it was just a work relationship.

"That's the kind of attitude she has. She doesn't know me. She doesn't know anything about me but she's decided already that she doesn't like me. I'm not really fond of people like that" she said bringing her beer to her lips.

"Whether you like it or not, you are the newbie. You have to prove yourself just like any other rookie would" Fin said finishing his beer.

"I'm fine with proving myself if she's willing to give me the chance. She wasn't. She wanted me to sit at my desk and keep my mouth shut". She knew she hadn't completely won Benson over yet but if she was being honest, that wasn't her priority. She wasn't going to lie to Tutuola and Rollins about that to stay on their good side, either. Fin explained to her that Benson had gone through a lot of changes and hardships in a short period of time and asked that she be patient with her. Reyes decided she'd try to put herself in Benson's shoes and be understanding of where she was coming from. Fin said his goodbyes and left Rollins and Reyes alone at the bar.

"So, Rollins, what's the deal? Why do you like me so much?" she asked. She wanted to get right to the point and figure out why Amanda's guard wasn't up like Benson and Amaro's.

"Never said I liked you" she joked.

Reyes laughed and finished her beer, "Touche" she said.

"No, I just...I know what it's like to be the new girl" she said in a serious tone. "I figured I'd give you a chance, get to know you before I decided you were no good". Chris appreciated that about Rollins. She could've been like Benson and Amaro and decided to put her through the ringer to see if she could take the heat but she decided to just give her an easy chance, allow her to do her job, and show her what she was about. "So, you moved here with your family?" Amanda asked, thinking she'd start getting to know her better right then.

"Uh, yeah. Mom, dad, sister, brother. Whole gang" she said. She was debating whether she wanted to get another beer. If she got another then that meant she'd stay and talk for a while. If she didn't then she'd ease her way out of the conversation. Before she could decide, Rollins ordered another for herself and asked she wanted one. She couldn't say no now. "What about you? You said you're from Georgia. Why'd you come up here?" Rollins gripped her glass a little tighter and Reyes wondered if she'd asked the wrong question.

"Uh, just needed a fresh start. Had a lot of drama back home, you know?". She thought it was too soon to tell her the whole truth about why'd she left.

"Yeah, I do" Chris said conveying her understanding. "If there's one thing my family knows, it's drama".

They stayed at the bar for another two hours or so. They talked about everything from family and how they'd grown up to sports; any and everything they could think of. They both had a feeling that they would be fast friends. They both got hit on all night by both men and women testing the waters to see if they were together. They finally settled up their tab and walked out of the bar together. Amanda got a cab but Chris said she wanted to walk. She liked the fresh air. Rollins laughed at her calling New York air fresh. Reyes reminded her that she was from Cali where the exhaust was thick. New York was big and definitely had a lot of exhaust but breathing here just felt easier. Rollins made her promise to call her when she got in to let her know she'd made it safely. They said their good nights and parted ways.

Spanish-English Translation

**Señora Soto, más despacio. No puedo entender**- Mrs. Soto, slow. I can't understand you.

**Por favor. Necesito que te calmes y que me escuches. Vete a casa y esperar allí. Voy a encontrarla. ¿Entiendes? Encontraré Ariana**- Please. I need y to calm down and listen to me. Go home and wait there. I will look for her. You understand? I will look for Ariana.

**Señor Soto, ¿puedo tener un minuto por favor**- Mr. Soto, can I have a minute please?


	6. Chapter 6: Jessica and Rachel Mullins

Chapter 6: Jessica and Rachel Mullins

After she left the bar with Amanda, Chris called Ryanne, the waitress she'd met at the restaurant they'd went to earlier that week. She went over to the restaurant and waited for her shift to end and they walked back to Chris' house together. She'd made the call to Amanda as promised and then turned all her attention to her guest. They'd been in bed pleasuring each other for hours when her phone started to ring over the soft music she had playing in her bedroom. She tried to ignore it and enjoy what Ryanne was doing to her under the covers but it wouldn't stop ringing. She told her to stop and reached over and grabbed her phone.

"Reyes" she answered not even trying to hide the annoyance in her voice. "Where?" Ryanne kept kissing her on chest and neck and licking her ear. "Yeah, ok. I'm on my way". She hung up the phone was immediately met with her bedmate's lips on her own. "I have to go" she said in between kisses.

"Humm...right now" she whined placing chaste kisses on Chris' lips.

"Yes, right now. I have to go to work". Chris didn't want to be rude but she needed to get this girl out of her house so she could leave. There was no way she was going to stay while she went to work.

"But it's like...four in the morning" she said still placing kissing up and down Chris' neck.

"Yeah, well criminals don't care about the time. Come on, I really have to go" she said lightly pushing her off of her. She got out of the bed and started to gather her clothes for her. "I need to shower really quick but I can drop you somewhere if you want". She handed Ryanne her clothes and waited for a response.

"No, that's ok. I'll just call a cab" she said as she pulled her clothes on. Chris could tell that her feelings were hurt but she didn't have time to think about it and if she was being honest with herself she really didn't care. She just nodded and left her room to go hop in the shower.

Chris came back ten minutes later to an empty bedroom. She moisturized her golden toned skin and put on black jeans and belt, a gray top with a black jacket and gray boots. She pulled her hair back in a low ponytail and clipped on her badge and gun. She grabbed her phone and keys and quietly headed out the door. When she stepped out onto the porch, Ryanne was sitting there waiting for her cab. She sat down next to her, "I don't mind driving you home, Ry" she said.

She shook her head, "It's fine. I already called the cab. It's five minutes away" she said not even looking at her. This was the part that Chris hated, feelings. She was never good with dealing with people's feelings so she just didn't.

"Ok, well, I...I have to go. I will...ummm...I'll call you, ok?" Ryanne still wouldn't look at her.

"Yeah right" she said not believing her. Chris just got up and went to her car. Ryanne's cab pulled up just as she drove away from her house.

She drove to hell's kitchen and met up with Fin and Amanda. The area was full of police cars, a fire truck and two ambulances. A crowd was starting to gather and uniformed officers were trying to keep them behind the crime scene tape. Chris showed her badge and ducked under the tape to go over to her partners. She tried to get a look at the scene but there was too many people surrounding the area. "Hey" she said seeing Fin and Amanda standing next to the fire truck, "What's going on?" she asked.

"Got two bodies, females, badly burned" Fin explained.

"Why is this ours?" she asked confused. She knew that SVU only hadn't sexually motivated crimes. Two burns victims would go to homicide.

"They were stripped naked before they were set on fire. They might have been raped. The ME is taking a look now to see if we'll be able to get anything from the bodies" Amanda said jumping in. Chris turned around to face the chaos surrounding the scene and saw a black women with curly hair approaching them.

"Whatcha got, doc?" Fin asked as she reached them.

"Well, you got lucky" she said,"Their backs are completely charred but everything else is intact. I'd say they were already dead when they were set on fire. They were badly beaten and raped. I found fluids on both women, took swabs. They're already on the way to the lab" she said explaining her findings.

"Any identifying marks: tattoos, birth marks, scars?" Chris asked. They'd been yet to be properly introduced so Rollins did the honors.

"Dr. Melinda Warner, this is detective Christina Reyes. She filling Liv's spot now that she's been promoted to Sergeant" she said making the introductions. They shook hands and exchanged pleasantries.

"There weren't any marks that I'd could see but I'll be able to tell more once they're on the table. I did get this off one of them though". She held up a bag with a silver medical bracelet inside. "She was a diabetic" she said handing it to Reyes.

"Any chance we can get in there?" she said looking over at the area surrounded by fire fighters.

"It took me twenty minutes to get them to let me examine the bodies. Good luck" Warner said as she turned and walked away. Chris decided she'd go over and try to talk her way over to look at the scene.

"Excuse me" she said showing her badge, "I know you have to secure the area, make sure there are no other fire hazards but is there any chance we could go over there and look around" she asked one of the fire fighters. She put on a sweet tone hoping to win him over.

"Like you said detective, we have to secure the area first" he said.

"Ah, come on. There's nothing here. They're already dead. It was a small fire set to two bodies. The blaze is gone. We just want to look for any identification, find out who they are, notify their families...please" she said nicely. Rollins stood behind and watched while she tried to sweet talk her way into the cordoned off area.

"Alright but make it quick" he said stepping aside and letting them pass. "Thanks". She and Rollins stepped over to get their first look at the bodies.

The smell of gasoline and burnt flesh filled their nostrils. Fin brought them both pairs of gloves to put on so they wouldn't contaminate anything. They checked the area around the bodies for purses or wallets. It was a long shot that they'd find anything but they had to try. Reyes spotted the dumpster for the shop that the women's bodies were dumped behind and jumped up on the edge, holding herself up on her hands, to peer inside. She saw a white trash bag in the midst of only black which told her that it didn't belong. She quickly reached in and grabbed it and hopped back to the ground. She sat the bag on the ground and opened it up to see clothes and purses inside. She yelled for Rollins to come and see what she'd found. "Has to be our vics" she said showing her the clothes and bags. Rollins pulled out one of the purses and opened it up, taking out a wallet.

"Jessica Mullins" she said reading the driver's license aloud. Chris grabbed the other bag and found a second wallet. She opened it up and found a student id,

"They look like mother and daughter to you?" Reyes asked. Rollins peered over her shoulder at the two bodies laying on the pavement.

She shook her head, "Look to be around the same age. Why?" Chris held up the id for her to see, "Rachel Mullins" Rollins said reading the id. "So, they're related. What do you think, sisters?" she asked. "

Or not sisters" Reyes said walking over to the bodies. Rollins grabbed the trash bag and put the purses back inside before following Reyes over to the victims were now covered with white sheets. She was kneeling down beside them, lifting the sheet to look at something. "Tan lines on both ring fingers" she said. She dropped the sheet back down and stood up.

"They were married" Fin said understanding their connection. They took off their gloves and stepped out of the area and let the fire fighters finish up. Rollins handed the bag to CSU and told them to voucher the contents and dust the wallets and that dumpster for prints. As they were leaving, the fire department finally finished and were allowing the bodies to be transported to the ME's office. Rollins, Reyes, and Tutuola headed to the precinct.

It was nearing eight o'clock when Benson and Amaro arrived at the precinct. Fin, Amanda, and Chris had waited a while to get their victim info and what they knew about the crime so far put up on the board before calling them in. They'd also gone ahead and taken care of the notifications. Reyes was sitting at her desk when they came in and Olivia was ready for her and Amaro to be brought up to speed. They gathered at the table in front of the board and waited for Reyes to join them. She was making a quick call home to make sure her brother had gotten up for work and her sister was up getting ready for school. She told her brother to make sure he put their mother's medicine out for her before he left. She hung up the phone and went over to the group giving her apologies for the delay.

"Alright, what have we got?" Cragen asked getting them started.

"Two females, Jessica and Rachel Mullins, 35 and 30 years old, both average women, educated, fit, and friendly from what I can tell from their social media. Jessica was a bank teller and Rachel was a student at Hudson. She was taking psychology classes. She was also a fitness coach. She ran classes out of a small studio that she rented" Rollins said starting the briefing. "Both women were beaten and raped, throats cut. They were dumped in Hell's kitchen and set on fire. ME puts time of death at around one this morning. Their backs were pretty badly burned but their fronts were mostly untouched by the fire so she was able to get DNA. Ran it through the system, no hits" she finished.

"How'd we id them? Were their prints in the system?" Amaro asked.

Reyes shook her head, "No. They were stripped naked but we found their clothes and wallets in a dumpster nearby. CSU wasn't able to lift any prints" she explained.

"So they're sisters, mother and daughter, what?"

"Wife and wife" Reyes said. "We saw tan lines on both women's ring fingers". Reyes sat on the table working on her second cup of coffee of the morning. She'd been the one to put up the pictures of the victims and write everything up on the board. She'd been doing a lot of thinking about what they looking at and where this case might go but she'd yet to share her thoughts. She was just waiting for the right time.

"Have we located the families?" Cragen asked. That was one of the worst parts of the job. Notifying family members of a death was always hard but it was necessary. Not just for the obvious reasons but families could often offered insight into victims: who they were, who they associated with, who might want to hurt them.

"Jessica's parents died five years ago, car accident" Fin said, "She has a brother though, lives in Jersey. Called him an hour ago, he's making the drive up to claim the body. Rachel and her family were on rocky terms since she came out seven years ago. When she married Jessica two and half years ago they cut off contact completely. They're religious and didn't want to have anything to do with her "sinful lifestyle". They said to release the body to Jessica's family" he explained.

"They won't even come in to id her? No funeral? Nothing?" Amaro said in disbelief.

"No. When we told them she was murdered her father said he wasn't surprised because of the life she was living. They didn't want to have anything to do with her then and they don't want to have anything to do with her now". Olivia closed her eyes and shook her head.

"Ok" she said with a sigh. "So we have two women, who were beaten, raped, stripped naked, dumped and then set on fire. We have fluids but no hits in the system, no prints on the dumpster, clothes or wallets, one brother who could possibly give insight into the victims, and the other family who won't be able to give any insight because they hadn't had a relationship with her in seven years. That's not a lot to go on" she said.

"Reyes" Cragen said trying to get her attention. He noticed that she was kind of staring off into space and he wanted to bring her back to earth. "Reyes" he repeated. She slowly gained her focus back.

"Yeah" she answered.

"You want to share that daydream with the rest of us?" he teased.

"Yeah, actually, I do...but not right now" she added quickly. He gave a weird look and folded his arms over his chest. "I just want to get my thoughts together before I share" she explained. That was true but she had a theory about where this case was going to go and she wanted more evidence to back it up before she opened her big mouth. She'd been thinking about what Fin said about being a rookie and having to prove herself. She didn't care if they liked her personally but she cared about doing her job and doing it well. If they didn't appreciate anything else about her, she knew they'd appreciate that.

A man walked through the squad room doors and came over to them. He looked tired and his eyes were red and puffy like he'd been crying. He took off his baseball cap and held it tightly in his hands. "Excuse me" he said getting their attention, "I'm looking for Detective Reyes". Chris hopped down off the table and walked over to him.

"Hi, I'm Detective Reyes" she said extending her hand, "You must be Jessica's brother".

He shook her hand and nodded, "Robert Mullins" he said. Upon hearing that he was the victim's brother, Rollins turned the board around so he wouldn't see the crime scene photos of his sister that they'd taped up.

"Why don't we go in here and talk?" she said putting a hand on his shoulder."Can I get you some coffee or water?" she asked nicely.

He pulled away from her touch, "Uh, no. I'd like to see Jessica now...please". His voice broke slightly when he said his sister's name. Chris wasn't sure what to say. She hadn't done much dealing with notifications and identifications or families in general when she worked narcotics.

"Uh, I...I really don't think that's a good idea. You should remember her the way she was, not how she is now" she said in the nicest way possible.

"What do you mean how she is now?" he asked confused. Reyes looked at him sympathetically. "Oh my god" he said, his eyes filling with tears, "What'd he do to her?" he asked. He was beginning to become hysterical and Reyes wasn't sure what to do or say. She wasn't exactly good at the whole comforting thing. She was making this up as she went along.

"Why don't we go in here and sit down and we can talk about it?" she asked. She wanted to give him the option to decline her offer to talk. Ultimately it was up to him whether he stayed at the precinct or went to view his sister's body. The rest of them sat quietly and watched as Reyes tried to console the man and get him to the interview room. They were surprised at how much compassion she was showing given the whole Ariana debacle. After a moment of thought, Robert nodded his head and walked over to the interview with Christina. She came out a minute later and went over to the coffee pot, poured a cup and stop by the group.

"Sooo...I don't really know what I'm doing. I was kinda winging that but I feel like it went well and I wanna try to talk to him by myself". She was directing this comment towards the Captain because, after all, it was his decision. But she interested to know if she'd have the support of everyone else.

"Well, you really shouldn't wing it" Olivia said.

"Yeah, you need to know what you're gonna say to him before you go in there" Amaro said agreeing. It was surprising to her that they didn't object to her going it alone but rather just gave her a few tips. Rollins and Fin jumped in with their two cents and Reyes listened attentively. She really didn't want to screw this up. The man had just lost his sister and she didn't want to make him feel any worse. After hearing what everyone had to say, she took a deep breath, grabbed the cup of coffee and went to talk to Jessica Mullins' brother.

Reyes got all of the information she could out of Robert Mullins about his sister and her wife. He told her that Rachel had basically become part of their family when she and Jessica started dating five years ago, just a few months before their parents' death. Rachel had been Jessica's rock through the entire ordeal. It made them closer. Jessica supported Rachel through her family troubles, returning the favor of being a rock when her family cut her off upon their engagement. It was a kind of death for her, losing her whole family. They became the people she counted on to be there for her. After some time, she decided that if they didn't want to see her, it was their loss. She wouldn't let them or their beliefs make her feel bad about who she was or who she loved. He told her about how happy they were, how much fun they had together, what a difference he'd seen in his sister since she met Rachel. They made each other better people. Robert gave Reyes a list of places that they frequented around the city and friends of theirs that could shed more light on who the women were. Chris had tried to hold off for as long as possible on telling Robert about what'd happened to his sister but she'd asked him all of her questions and he was asking to see his sister again. She explained as gently as she could what his sister and her wife had gone through but the words hit him like a ton of bricks. He became hysterical and kept asking her why anyone would do that to them. She couldn't answer him. After about five minutes she was able to calm him down and had an officer escort him to his hotel to get settled in.

They gathered again in front of the board to discuss what they're next move was. They split up the list of friends the brother had given them and went out to do interviews. The captain paired Fin with Rollins and Amaro with Reyes while Olivia went over to the ME's office to see if her autopsy had turned up anything else they could use. They did their interviews and met up for lunch to discuss what they'd found out.

"The ME didn't turn up anything new. They were both beaten and raped. She confirmed that they were both dead when they were set on fire. Not a professional, the cut to their throats weren't clean. They were jagged...almost hesistant" Olivia said explaining Warner's findings.

"Like he'd never done it before" Reyes added. They looked at her confused.

"What makes you think that?" Fin asked sipping on his soda.

"Hesitant wound patterns usually indicate an inexperienced offender. And his MO is really specific; beaten, raped, throats cut, stripped naked and set on fire. If he'd been done this before he'd be in the system" she said taking a drink of her coffee.

"Maybe he's just never gotten caught" Amaro said.

"Yeah but he leaves his DNA behind so we would've gotten matches from other cases logged in the system. He doesn't use any counterforensic measures because he knows we can't match it to anything".

"Well, that still leaves us with nothing. What'd you guys get from your interviews?" Olivia asked picking at the salad in front of her.

"Pretty much the same thing from everyone", Rollins said jumping in, "They were great people; a fun, loving couple. Nobody could think of anyone who'd want to hurt them" she said.

"Ditto" Reyes said giving what they'd gotten from they're interviews.

"So we have nothing to go on" she said obviously frustrated.

"We could go to some of the places they went to regularly" Reyes suggested, "See if they had altercations with anyone in the last few weeks". They agreed that would be their next objective. Reyes pulled out her notepad with the list of places Robert had given her and split them evenly between them. They split up again, Benson joining Amaro and Reyes, and went to do more interviews. Again, they came up empty. Nobody remembered Rachel or Jessica having any problems with anyone in the weeks leading up to their deaths. Everyone seemed shocked to hear that they'd been murdered. They'd lost count of how many times they heard "everyone loved them" throughout the day. They returned to the station around nine in the evening and updated the captain. They all agreed that there was nothing else they could do tonight. They wrapped up paperwork for their day of interviews and then called it a night.


	7. Chapter 7: Lauren and Isabelle Conard

Chapter 7: Lauren and Isabelle Conard

It was going on two o'clock in the morning and Reyes was laying in bed. She'd finally gotten her brain to slow down enough to close her eyes and try to sleep. She was starting to drift off when her phone chimed on the stand next to her bed. _"Urgh, You have got to be kidding me"_ she thought in frustration. She rolled over and grabbed her phone, hitting the unlock code and looking at her screen. She had a text from Sgt Benson of an address telling her to get there right away. After a few more groans she threw back the covers and got out of bed. She quickly got dressed and grabbed her phone and keys and headed out the door. When she got to the address, there was a very familiar scene: crowd gathering, uniformed officers and crime scene tape, fire truck, ambulances, another alley in Hell's Kitchen. She spotted the team standing outside the crime scene tape looking at the scene. She hustled over where they were standing.

"Don't tell me..." she said looking at Rollins.

"Two more bodies, set on fire. They're securing the area now" she said confirming her suspicions. Reyes didn't want to think it but she couldn't help it. More bodies is what they needed. The fact was, they didn't have much of anything to go on from the Mullins' crime scene and they wouldn't get anything more if this guy didn't give them more victims. A fire fighter walked over to where they standing, "Scene's clear. You can go in now" he said continuing past them to the fire truck. They ducked under the crime scene tape to get a closer look at the bodies. Dr. Warner had already beat them there and was taking her first look at the victims.

"Burns aren't as bad as the first two victims" Reyes said as she looked down at them.

Warner nodded, "Someone spotted the blaze not long after it was set. He went for help and they put out they blaze together" she explained. Rollins walked over to them holding a white trash bag, the same a the one dumped at the first scene.

"Same thing" she said approaching them, "Clothes and wallets inside. They're names are Lauren and Isabelle Conard. Both thirty four years old. Found business cards in their wallets; they worked together, paralegals".

"Are there tan lines on their ring fingers?" Reyes asked. Melinda looked at both women's hands and nodded her head. "Took their wedding rings again" she said softly. She inhaled slowly and let it out in a huff. If she wasn't sure about her theory before, she was definitely sure about it now. Melinda and her assistants bagged up the bodies and loaded them for transport to the morgue.

"I'll let you know what more I find" she said before turning and leaving the scene. Benson, Amaro, and Tutuola walked over to Rollins and Reyes.

"CSU is dusting the dumpster for prints" Amaro said stopping in front of them.

"They won't get anything but I think I know what this is about" Reyes said. She looked around the alley with laser sharp focus for something, anything, that would give them more on their perp.

"What?" Fin asked. Out of nowhere something caught her eye. There was movement behind some bags of trash not far from where the bodies were left. Ignoring Fin's question, she walked over to a makeshift shelter and kneeled down to talk to whoever was inside.

"Excuse me" she said nicely, "Can you come out here. I don't want to hassle you. I just want to talk to you for a second". She waited for whoever was in there to make a decision about coming out or not. She saw a hand creep out from underneath the blanket covering the cardboard roof and push it to the side. A young guy, no more than eighteen years old, stuck his head out and scared brown eyes looked into Chris' caring greens. "Hi" she said with a soft smile, "What's your name?" He just stared at her for a second then decided she seemed nice enough to trust her.

"Donnie" he answered softly.

"Hi, Donnie. I'm Christina. You know about what's going on over there?" She asked as gently as she could, not wanting him to think she was accusing him.

"I didn't do anything" he said defensively.

She nodded her head, "Yeah, but maybe you saw something". He was shivering from the morning cold and from the looks of it didn't have much clothing on to make it better.

"White guy, crazy. Threw away a big white bag then he walked away. I saw the flames, then I heard yelling. I didn't want to come out. I was too scared".

Chris and nodded her head, "Ok. Thank you, Donnie" she said nicely. He nodded his head and started to go back inside his cardboard home. His hand was frail and shaking uncontrollably. Chris felt so much for him. "Hey" she said catching him before he retreated completely inside his shelter, "How about you come out of there and come back to the station with me" she suggested.

"Nuh uh" he said shaking his head from side to side.

"You can get a nice, warm shower and some fresh, warm clothes; a nice hot meal. Whatever you want, it's on me. Come on, it's freezing out here". He thought about her offer for a moment before finally crawling out of the small space. Just as Reyes suspected, his clothes were worn and tattered and he was incredibly thin. She led him over to one of the squad cars and told one of the officers to drive him to the station, get him some clothes and a shower and she'd be there shortly. It took some doing but she convinced Donnie to let the officer drive him and she would meet him there. She walked back over and joined her teammates.

"He see anything?" Fin asked as she joined their huddle.

"Crazy white guy. Said he saw him dump the bag and then there was fire. He was too scared to come out".

Benson nodded her head, "Well it's something. We'll sit him down with a sketch artist, see what he can come up with. Let's get back to the station and add them to the victim work up and start tracking down their families". They dispersed to their cars and made their back to the precinct. When they arrived back at the precinct, Reyes checked the interview rooms, looking for Donnie. He was nowhere to be found. She spotted the officer she'd told to drive him back.

"Hey" she said getting his attention, "Where's the kid you drove here?" she asked.

"Oh, he's in the lockup" he said nonchalantly.

"What?!" She immediately went from zero to ten on the pissed off meter.

The officer looked dumbfounded, "You said to escort him back to the station. I put him in lockup so he wouldn't try to run off" he explained.

"I told you to do a couple of things and putting him in a holding cell wasn't one of them" she said angrily.

"Look, girlie, he's a vagrant and he was mouthing off. I thought I was doing you a favor". If Chris were a cartoon there would have been steam coming out of her ears. She walked over to the officer and got in his face.

"First of all, if you ever refer to me as "girlie" again I will fuck up your life in every way I can possibly think of. Second, if you ever want to want to go on patrol again, you will go get him and do what I told you to do when I told you to bring him here". Her voice was calm, almost eerie and she'd gained the attention of everyone in the squad room. No one thought the officer should call her bluff. He backed away from her and headed to the lockup to get her witness. She turned around and saw everyone staring at her, "Get back to work" she said. Instantly, people started moving about the squad room again, resuming their tasks. Olivia, Nick, Fin nor Amanda said anything to her about what'd just happened. They just continued to fill the board with information and search the victims' closest relatives. Benson sent Amaro to their address to look around and see what he could find; anything to help them learn more about the victims.

After Donnie was showered and dressed in fresh, warm clothes, Reyes set him up in the interview room across from Cragen's office and asked him what he wanted to eat. "Breakfast" he replied. She laughed and asked what he wanted for breakfast. He seemed surprised that she was letting him choose specifically what he wanted to eat. He said pancakes, eggs, sausage, bacon, hash browns, and grits with apple juice. He looked like he was waiting for her to say that he was asking for too much and was stunned when she didn't. Reyes left the interview room to go take care of his breakfast. She almost told the uniformed officer that'd pissed her off to go get it but she didn't trust him not to do something to the food. Instead she got on her computer and found a place that had everything Donnie wanted and also delivered. She ordered a bunch of extra everything for herself and the rest of the team and got an estimated delivery time of forty minutes. While she was waiting for the food to arrive she went in the interview room with Benson to question Donnie about what he saw in the alley.

"Donnie, this is Sergeant Benson. We're just gonna ask you some questions about what you saw, ok?" He nodded his head and clutched the cup of coffee Chris had given him. "Ok. So, first things first. What's your whole name and how old are you?" she asked.

"Donald Hanover. I'm seventeen" he said quietly.

"How'd you end up out on the streets?" It wasn't something he liked talking about. He was always nervous that people would treat him badly. But he liked Chris, trusted her. He felt like he could tell her. "

I'm gay. My parents weren't happy when they found out; said they couldn't have me around my younger brother. They were worried I might rub off on him or something. So they told me to get lost. I was at a shelter for a while but the people there weren't very nice. They'd try to beat me up and take my stuff. So I left and I haven't been to another one". It pained Reyes to know that parents could just toss their kids to the side because they didn't like who they turned out to be. Parents are supposed to be the ones to love you no matter what.

"How long ago was that?" she asked.

"When my parents kicked me out; six months...almost seven. About five since I stopped trying to find a good shelter. That alley was best place I'd found so far. I've been there for almost a month".

"Ok, Donnie. Let's talk about the man you saw in the alley" Olivia said jumping in. "You said he was white and crazy?"

He nodded his head, "Yeah, maybe forty; not too tall. Wore jeans and a black hoodie. I didn't want to look for too long. I didn't want him to notice I was there. He just tossed the bag in the dumpster and walked away".

"What made you think he was crazy?" Reyes asked.

"He was talking to himself. Spouting all kinds of religious stuff. The kind of stuff my parents said when they kicked me out; about abominations and going to hell". This was just what Reyes needed to hear to confirm her theory. She was ready to share her thoughts with the group. There was a knock at the door and Rollins walked in with the sketch artist in tow.

"Donnie, this is Rick. He's a sketch artist. I want you to describe the man you saw to him" Benson said getting up and letting Rick take her place.

"I told you, I didn't really get a good look" he said.

"It's ok" Chris said reassuring him,"Just do the best you can". She got up from the table and walked out with Olivia and Amanda to gather at the table in front of the board.

Captain Cragen came out of his office and stood next to the board. "Alright, so we've got two more bodies and a witness who may be able to give a description. Any more physical evidence on the bodies?" he asked.

"Same as the first vics" Amanda said, "Fluids present but useless because he's not in the system". Reyes stared at the board and thought about what Donnie said about what he heard the perp saying. She decided she was ready to share her theory with the group.

"Great, so we're no closer to catching him and don't have any theories about who this guy is or why he's doing this" Cragen said not pleased by their lack of progress.

"It's a hate crime" Reyes said, confident that her theory about this was correct.

"What makes you think that?" Fin asked.

"He's attacking married lesbian couples. Donnie heard him rambling about them being abominations and sending them to hell. He's making a statement with how kills them" she said explaining why she thought so. "A lot of people think that they can beat the gay out of their kids. How often, when a lesbian is raped, does her rapist say he did it to "fix that gay gene"? Stripping them to humiliate them and then setting them on fire in Hell's Kitchen ie. burning in hell".

"Maybe he set them in fire to make them suffer" Amaro suggested. Reyes shook her head in disagreement.

"If he wanted them to suffer he would burn them alive but he kills them first. It's symbolic of the flames of hell" she said using air quotes. "He took the time to strip them naked and then left everything behind. Everything except their wedding rings. He's stripping them of their marriage. He's probably proud of what he's doing, thinks he's on a mission to rid the world of married lesbian sin".

"That's a pretty good behavioral analysis detective" said a voice familiar to everyone. They all looked in the direction of the voice and seemed happy to see him. Reyes pretended not to know who he was. They said their hellos and he took a seat at the table.

"Chris Reyes this is Dr. George Huang, a forensic psychiatrist with the FBI" Cragen said introducing them. They shook hands and exchanged pleasantries.

"I think you hit it right on the nose, detective" he said agreeing with her. "Olivia sent me what you all have gathered so far and I took a look. I'd also add to what Detective Reyes has said by saying that he doesn't care if he gets caught" he said.

"What makes you think that?" Fin asked again. He didn't know where Reyes and Huang were coming up with their theories.

"He leaves his DNA behind" Reyes said answering for the doctor. Dr. Huang nodded his head in agreement.

"Even though he knows that he'll be easily linked to the crimes from the evidence he leaves behind, he's not taking any steps to cover his tracts. He doesn't think he's doing anything wrong" he said.

"So he's delusional" Fin concluded.

Reyes chuckled, "Well, I think that goes without saying" she said picking up her coffee and taking a sip. "But I think it's personal too" she said.

"Wait. How'd it become personal now? I mean, we've gone over the backgrounds of the victims; searched through their apartments. They don't have much in common except they sometimes hit the same bars but that's not unusual, right? Aren't there only a few lesbian bars in the city?" he asked looking at Reyes.

"Why are you asking me?" she asked a bit offended that he just assumed she knew how many lesbian bars there were.

"I wasn't asking you specifically. I was just posing the question...to the group" he said covering his ass.

"Yeah, sure you were".

"Ok, moving on" Cragen said ending the little spat. "Is she right, doc? You think there's something personal in his motive?" he asked the expert.

"I think there's definitely a strong possibility of a personal agenda" he said nodding his head.

"Uh, care to elaborate on that?" Amanda asked leaning on the back of a chair.

He turned and looked at Christina, "Detective" he said inviting her the chance to expand on her theory.

"He has a type" she said simply. They all turned and looked at the pictures of the victims, noticing the pattern for the first time. "Lauren and Jessica both have dark hair and green eyes. Isabelle and Rachel, blonde hair and blue eyes. A type usually means that they represent something, or someone. Most likely someone he fells hurt or betrayed him. The religious aspect is just the excuse he gives himself to act out his revenge". Dr. Huang was noticeably impressed by how spot on Reyes' analysis of the case was. He almost wanted to pull her to the side and ask her what she thought about joining the FBI. The door to the interrogation room opened and Rick, the sketch artist, walked out. He went over to Olivia and handed her the sketch he'd worked up with Donnie and she taped it up on the board. It wasn't the best but it was something. The guy looked how Donnie had described him; white, early to mid forties, short hair, no visible tattoos or scars.

"Great. This is a sketch of more than half the men in the city" Fin said. They were all frustrated with how this investigation was going. They had a working theory of the crime and not much else. They were in desperate need of a break in the case.

"Yeah, well, ugh, he did say he didn't get a good look" Reyes said. She was just as frustrated as everyone else but their lack of progress wasn't Donnie's fault. He'd done his best to help them which was a lot more than what he had to do.

A delivery man walked into the squad room, "Is there a Chris Reyes here?" he asked holding three large bags. She hopped down from the table, "Yeah. That's me". She walked over to her desk and grabbed her wallet to pay for the food. "It'll be fifty four eighty" he said giving her the total. She handed him three twenties and a five, "Keep the change" she said trading him the money for the bags. He thanked her and then left. She carried the food over to the table and took it out of the bags. They'd put a bunch of extra plates, napkins, and plastic spoons and forks in one of the bags. She set everything out and told them to help themselves before taking a box container and the bottle of apple juice then heading to the interview room. They all looked around stunned for a minute before Fin stepped up and grabbed a plate.

"What?" he said noticing them staring at him. "She said to help ourselves". They laughed and them joined him in getting some of the breakfast food. Chris gave Donnie his breakfast and thanked him for helping them out on the case. She told him they'd figure out something for him but she didn't want him staying on the streets anymore. She promised to keep working with him until they found the right place. She left him to enjoy his breakfast and joined everyone back in the squad room. They sat around the table tossing out their ideas of things they could do to close down on this perp. George took this opportunity to chat up Reyes.

"You really have great insight into this perp already. Almost as if you're an experienced profiler" he said complimenting her.

"I might have taken a seminar or two back in California" she said.

"Well, whoever taught it did well".

She smiled, "Yeah, you did". She smiled at the blush that came over him. She knew it wasn't because he was modest about his work but embarrassment that he didn't remember her. "Don't worry about it. It was a big room and I sat way in the back". She got up from the table to go throw her plate away and came back with her phone and laptop. She did a search of shelters and group homes specifically for kids in Donnie's situation and started making phone calls to find him a place to stay.

Fin overheard Chris on the phone and offered her a solution. He told her about his son, Ken, who worked at a group home for gay teens put out on the streets by their parents. He said he'd give him a call to see about getting Donnie a spot there. They finished breakfast and cleaned up all the bags and boxes. Captain Cragen heard his phone ringing in his office and went to take the call. He came back a few minutes later with a solemn look on his face, "We got two more bodies".


	8. Chapter 8: Hallie and Kaitlyn Darnell

**AN: Hey all! So I'm not getting a lot of feedback on this story but I do seem to getting some follows so that's great. Please review. I like to know what readers are thinking about the direction the story is going. All (positive) criticism and suggestions are welcomed. If you don't like it, tell me (and tell me why please) and I'll try to fix it. If you do like it, tell me that too and I'll keep doing what I'm doing but please give me something. So, here's more and I hope you all like it.**

Chapter 8: Hallie and Kaitlyn Darnell

The scene was the same as the two before it. Two women, stripped naked, throats cut, set on fire. He left the same white trash bag with all of their belongings, except their wedding rings. They'd found a receipt for a gay friendly cafe in a wallet belonging to Hallie Darnell, time stamped seven am. They figured he must have grabbed them when they were leaving. They'd done the family notifications and interviewed close friends of the victims and gone through the victims apartment to learn more about them. Hallie was an investment banker and her wife, Kaitlyn, was a first grade teacher. They were, by all accounts, the perfect couple; high school sweethearts who went to college together and then got married shortly after they both graduated. They had nothing in common with the other couples other than a couple popular gay friendly hangouts around the city and of course they fit the perps type. Hallie was a brunette with green eyes and Kaitlyn had blonde hair and blue eyes. He'd been careful to conceal himself, leaving the bodies further back in the alley. Even in broad daylight, no one recognized him. He'd had his hood up so no one could make out his face, just a middle aged white man. He always managed to be one step ahead of them. They figured their best chance at catching the perp was figuring out how he picked his victims.

It was going on four in the afternoon when they got back to the station. A crowd of people had formed outside with signs demanding justice and others condemning the victims to hell. Uniformed officers set up barricades to keep them off the precinct steps and out of the street. As they were going inside, news vans were pulling up. It seemed that their case was about to get a lot more attention than they wanted. They added more information to the board and discussed their theories about how he was choosing these couples.

"Ok, so we know he has a type that's really important to him" Reyes started, "and he's sticking to it. I just...it's really specific don't you guys think?" she asked. "I mean there's no shortage of blonde haired, blue eyed women...anywhere. Case in point" she said looking at Rollins, "but dark haired women with green eyes. How often does that happen?".

"Seems to happen often enough" Rollins said. "Case in point" she said gesturing to the pictures of the victims, "and case in point" she repeated looking at Chris.

"Ok. So how do we think he's choosing them?" Benson asked. "They overlap at one bar, a restaurant and the cafe that Hallie and Kaitlyn went to this morning".

"So maybe he goes to those places, watches and waits until he finds couples that fit his type" Fin suggested.

"And what, just he happens to hit the jackpot three days in a row?" Reyes asked. "I just can't believe it's that easy to find couples that fit his type. I was the only one in my whole class with dark hair and green eyes. And it was a pretty big class" she said before quickly finishing her coffee. "It was about five hundred students and there I was all on my lonesome, the only one with black hair and green eyes. Every other dark haired girl had brown or like hazel or..." they all recognized that she was starting to ramble. Rollins reached over and took her coffee cup from her.

"I think you've had enough for today" she said sitting the cup on her side of the table out of Reyes' reach.

"Ahhh, but I" she said starting to argue.

"Uh un" Rollins said shaking her head. Reyes let out a huff of air.

"Fine" she said with a pout. "Anyway, like I was saying, I don't think that he just luckily stumbled on these couples. I mean come on, three days in a row he just happens to find three different couples that fit his preference?"

"So, how do you think he finds them?" Fin asked. She shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't know. I thought this was supposed to be a group effort? I feel like I'm doing a lot of talking" she said slightly joking. Rollins shook her head and chuckled.

"Ok, so maybe it is like Fin says. He goes to these places, the bars and cafes and he watches and waits until he sees a couple that...suits him. Then he follows them, gets their routine down, and waits for the perfect time to strike" she suggested.

"I like the way you think" Chris said. Rollins rolled her eyes and kept a tight grip on Reyes' coffee cup. "Hey, did we ever find out what those holes in the walls at the apartments were?" she asked looking at Amaro.

"CSU thinks they were put there to mount things on the wall. Pictures maybe" he said.

"Or cameras" she suggested. "So, maybe we should jump on his bandwagon".

"What? Follow couples and then put cameras in their apartments?" Fin asked.

"No. Well not the cameras part" she said.

"You mean go out to the places the vics had in common and wait until we see a couple that fits his type?" Amaro asked. Chris nodded her head.

"Yeah. They had three places in common right? The bar, the cafe and that italian restaurant. I love Italian so I call dibs on going there".

"That sound like a plan to everyone?" Cragen asked wanting everyone to be on the same page.

"Sounds like the only the plan we have right now" Olivia said. They all nodded in agreement.

"Ok. Let's start with the restaurant tonight. All of you go. Then tomorrow you can do the cafe during the day and then the bar in the evening. Go home, get changed, meet back here at six thirty to head over to the restaurant" he said dismissing them.

"I'll call and make us a reservation" Rollins said pulling out her phone and looking up the number to the restaurant. The rest of them got up from their places around the table, gathered their things and headed out the door. They walked past the crowd of protesters to get to their cars and went home to get ready for dinner. While she was home, Reyes made jambalaya and put it on the stove. She set the timer and told her sister to check on every ten minutes until the timer went off. She made sure her mother took her evening pills and then went to get ready for dinner. She came down at five forty and checked on dinner one last time before she had to leave. Her dad and brother walked in, dropped their stuff right in the doorway and started to head up the stairs. They'd only taken two steps forward when she saw the dirt falling from their boots.

"No. Por supuesto que no" she said stopping them. "Quítate esos zapatos y dejarlas en el tapete. Y tomar esas cosas piso de arriba. Esta casa está limpia. Quiero que siga así". They groaned their complaints but followed her orders, kicking off their dirty boots on the mat by the door and grabbing their bags to take them upstairs. "Jeza" she said turning to her sister, "I'll be calling your teachers tomorrow to check in. I better like what I hear" she said. Jeza just rolled her eyes and looked back down at her homework. "No rodar sus ojos hacia mí, chica" she snapped. She just kept her eyes on her homework. Her mom, dad, and brother came down the stairs and she checked her watched. She had forty minutes until she had to be back at the station.

"Ay mija" her mother beamed as she laid eyes on her, "you look beautiful. Espero es guapo" she said moving her hair out of her face.

"No, mama. I'm not going on a date. I'm going back to work" she said.

"You're going to work dressed like that?" her brother asked not convinced she wasn't going on a date. Robbie was always trying to be the protective big brother. Whenever they were out as a family and some guy put the moves on her, he was right there to shut it down.

"Yes, I am. Dinner's on the stove. It should be ready in about ten minutes. I have to go" she said quickly making her way to the door. She knew the conversation that was coming if she didn't get out of the house quickly.

"If you dated as much as you work, you'd have found a husband by now" her mother quipped.

"Mami, please, don't start" she said opening the door. "Have a good night. Don't wait up". She hurried to her car to make her way back to the station on time. She saw everyone else's cars on the parking lot and knew she was the last to arrive. She looked at her watch again and it read six fifteen. "I'm not late" she said to herself as she walked up to the precinct doors. The protesters that had gathered earlier in the day were still out in full force, yelling at each other across the barricades the officers set up to separate them.

"The lesbian community is under attack and all you cops are doing is going out for a nice time?!" one woman yelled as Chris walked by.

"The lord is laying seige to these abominations. His will is being done. There is no need for police interference" a man yelled from the other side, waving his bible in the air. Reyes just kept walking up the stairs, through the precinct doors and up to the squad room, shaking off what she'd just heard. She walked through the squad room doors and went over to her desk, not noticing that everyone was staring at her. She was a wearing a light blue dress that stopped just above her knees with black high heels that accentuated the muscles in her legs. Her jet black hair fell around her face in waves of curls and the black eyeliner and mascara she had on made her green eyes pop. She opened her laptop and quickly checked her emails before shutting it again and turning around, finally seeing everyone's eyes on her.

"What?" she asked. They all shook their heads and looked away. Captain Cragen came out of his office at six thirty on the nose.

"We all ready?" he asked looking at each his detectives. His eyes lingered a little longer on Reyes than they did on the rest of his detectives. "You all look great".

"I made our reservation for seven so we should start heading over" Rollins said. Chris looked over at her for the first time since she walked into the squad room. She was wearing black dress pants and a powder blue blouse that matched Chris' dress almost perfectly. She wore a light layer of make up and clear gloss on her lips. If they stood next to each other, it would look like they planned for their outfits to match. She'd taken her hair down from the ponytail she had earlier, letting her blonde locks fall down her shoulders. They all noticed, maybe for the first time, that the two of them fit the victim type perfectly. Rollins looked over to see Reyes staring at her. She held her gaze for a moment before looking away.

"Alright then" Cragen said breaking the awkward silence. "Head on out". They decided to just take one car and since Amaro had an SUV, he offered to drive them. They piled in, Olivia in the front and Fin, Amanda, and Chris in the back and made the drive to the restaurant. When they arrived, Rollins gave her name and they were seated immediately. Everyone in the restaurant seemed to have their eyes on Chris and Amanda as they walked to their table. The other three people in their group were a bit of an afterthought. They sat down and ordered their drinks and started looking over the menu. They talked in the car and decided they needed to act like a normal group of friends, not cops. They were enjoying their food and light banter of conversation, careful to keep an eye on the other patrons. There were a couple of blondes with blue eyes and a couple of dark haired women but none with green eyes and none of them had come together.

Reyes happened to look up at the exact time that Ryanne, her waitress friend, walked into the restaurant. She was with another brunette woman and a man with short blonde hair, who looked to be a couple. Chris quickly looked away, "Shit" she said under her breath. Everyone looked at her as she tried to shrink in her chair. She was hoping that Ryanne would get to her table without noticing her. She put her elbows on the table and brought her forearms up to shield her face then turned to Amanda and asked her to pretend to have a conversation with her.

"Chris?" Ryanne said trying to decipher if it was really her. She almost pretended not to hear her but decided that probably wasn't the best course of action. She put her hands down and turned to look at her.

"Hey" she said nicely. She was hoping that this wouldn't be an awkward scene but with her luck she wasn't holding her breath.

"Hi. I thought you were gonna call".

"I was, I mean, I...I am. I've just been busy, working" she said. She just wanted Ryanne to go to her table and leave her alone.

"You don't look busy" she said looking around the table.

"Well, I am Ryanne. I'm working" she said becoming impatient. Ryanne looked between Chris and Amanda, noticing that they were dressed alike.

"Is she your girlfriend?" Ryanne asked looking between the two of them.

"No" Reyes said quickly. She sounded a little offended by the suggestion which kind of hurt Amanda's feelings. Amanda didn't know why it hurt her feelings that Chris would object so adamantly to dating her but it did. "Look I said I would call you and I will, ok? So, can you just go?" she asked. Ryanne looked at her like she couldn't believe Chris was blowing her off. "I really am working" she said trying to get rid of her. Ryanne sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Fine" she said. She walked around the table to where Chris was sitting and leaned down, kissing her firmly on the lips. "You better call" she said before standing up and walking away to her table. She sat down with the couple she came in with, who looked over at Chris, seemingly checking her out and nodding their approval. The mood at the detective's table was awkward, to say the least. Nobody knew exactly what to say to start up conversation again. Amaro had a slight grin on his face from the knowledge that he was right in his assumptions that Reyes was gay. Olivia and Fin looked back and forth between each other, not sure what to say. Amanda shifted uncomfortably in her chair and all Chris could think was that she could really use a drink. Unlucky for her, they were still working. Another forty five minutes passed with awkwardness and silence besides the clinking of forks on glass plates.

"Uh, so how much longer are we staying here?" Reyes asked breaking the silence. "There haven't been any couples to walk in here that fit his type". Olivia looked at her watch and it was going on ten o'clock. The restaurant closed in another hour.

"Alright, let's call it a night". She waved the waitress over and asked for the check. They settled the bill and left the restaurant. When they got outside, Ryanne was there waiting for Chris.

"Oh my god" she said, "Are you stalking me? Because that's a real turn off".

"No. I just...I wanted to..." Chris was really annoyed at this point and didn't want to hear anything Ryanne had to say.

"I said I would call you, Ry, but I gotta tell you I really don't think I want to anymore".

"It's just...we had sex and now you're ignoring me. I don't get it. What'd I do wrong?" she asked.

"Uh, we're...gonna go wait in the car" Rollins said. She quickly walked away and Benson, Amaro and Tutuola followed behind her. Chris wasn't the type to be shy or embarrassed but she didn't want everyone knowing her business. She'd also noticed that Rollins seemed jealous inside the restaurant and just now, when Ryanne mentioned them having sex, Rollins couldn't get away fast enough. She would deal with that later. Right now, she needed to deal with Ryanne.

"You didn't do anything wrong...until tonight. I said I would call you, Ry. I know you probably wanted me to call you the next day but I'm not on your schedule".

"I know that" she said trying to resolve the situation. She hadn't intended to upset Christina. She just wanted her to pay attention to her.

"And what you did in there, not ok. I have to work with them. I told you I was working and then you accuse me of dating someone and then kiss me in front of everyone. Ryanne, we're not together, ok? You don't have any right to be jealous of anyone I'm with" she said. She wanted to be clear of where they stood because obviously her soft approach wasn't working.

"I thought you said you weren't with her?" she asked jealously.

"Ryanne! Are you listening to anything I'm saying?!" she yelled. Ryanne sighed and took a step closer to Chris and wrapped her arms around her waist.

"Yes, I'm listening. I'm sorry, ok? You're right. I'm being really jealous and a little stalker-ish. I'm just not use to girls not wanting to call me after we've been together, that's all". Chris took Ryanne's arms from around her waist and took a step back.

"Ryanne, I like you. I think you're a great girl" she said.

"But?" she asked knowing a "but" was coming.

"But I don't want to date you" she said bluntly.

"So why'd you come back to the restaurant to talk to me?" Chris could tell that she'd just hurt her feelings.

"Because I was attracted to you and I wanted to..."

"You just wanted to fuck me" she said answering for her. Ryanne wasn't the kind of girl who could have no strings attached sex. Chris just wished she would've figured her for that type before getting involved with her. She didn't want to hurt her feelings any more than she already had but she didn't want to lie to her either.

"Yeah" she answered honestly. "That's all I wanted. I'm sorry. I know you want more but I can't give that to you". She waited for her to say something but she just stood there, trying to hold back her tears. "Look, I have to go. I'm..."

"Working" she said finishing her sentence. "Yeah, whatever". She turned and walked across the street and got into her car. Chris walked over to Amaro's SUV and climbed in next to Rollins.

"Everything alright?" Amaro asked.

"Yeah, everything's good" she answered nonchalantly. Nick started the car and pulled out of the restaurant parking lot to head back to the station. They checked in with the captain about their night out. They hadn't seen one couple that fit the victim type nor had they noticed anyone who seemed to be scoping people out. He told them to go home and get some sleep but to come back bright and early. They needed to be at the cafe the couples went to for breakfast and lunch dates. It was eleven fifteen when they were walking out of the precinct to head home. Reyes wasn't sure if now was the right time to address the tension between herself and Rollins but she figured, no time like the present.

"Hey, Rollins" she said calling across the parking lot her, "Wait up". Rollins stopped in the middle of the parking lot and Reyes hurried over to meet her. "Ummm, listen, I don't really know you very well and you don't know me. I felt like we were getting to know each other and that we could be friends, you know, outside of work but after tonight I just...ummm...I feel like maybe you want to be more than just friends..."

"That's ridiculous" Rollins said stopping her mid-speech. "I'm not gay". Her voice was completely confident even though, on the inside, she was questioning the feelings she had for her coworker.

"Uh, ok". Chris wasn't sure what to do with that reaction. No matter what Rollins said, she knew she was attracted to her. "I just got the sense at the restaurant that you were...kind of jealous when Ryanne came over and..."

"I'm not jealous. Why would I be jealous?" Rollins asked interrupting her again. Chris somewhat understood what Amanda was going through. She had a hard time coming to terms with the reality that she was gay but she'd accepted it some time ago. She thought it must be harder for Rollins, though, to be so secure in who she thought she was only to have it challenged by her own feelings.

"I understand it might be hard for you to accept but...come on. You were jealous" she said. Rollins opened her mouth to argue but Reyes didn't want to hear anymore of her denials. "Look, I just don't want things to be awkward between us. We both have jobs to do and I would like for us to keep things professional. I always like to be professional which is why I don't get involved with co-workers. It's kind of a rule of mine" she said. She was trying not to mince words and just be completely honest.

"Well, that's a good rule but it wouldn't matter because I'm not gay" she repeated.

"Ay dios mio" she said softly. "Ok". Chris saw this conversation going absolutely nowhere. She'd said what she had to say and she was just going to have to be satisfied with that. "Well, good night". She turned and started to walk to her car. Amanda stood there in the middle of the parking lot, watching her walk away. She tried to peel her eyes away but she just couldn't. Reyes suddenly stopped and turned back around to see Rollins staring at her. She laughed to herself and then started walking again. _"Not gay my ass" _she thought to herself.

**Spanish- English Translations**

**No. Por supuesto que no**- No. Absolutely not

**Quítate esos zapatos y dejarlas en el tapete. Y tomar esas cosas piso de arriba. Esta casa está limpia. Quiero que siga así**- Take those shoes off and leave them on the mat. And take that stuff upstairs. This house is clean. I want it to stay that way

**No rodar sus ojos hacia mí, chica**- Don't roll your eyes at me, girl

**Espero es guapo- **I hope he's handsome

**Ay dios mio**- Oh my god


	9. Chapter 9: Amanda and Christina Rollins?

Chapter 9: Amanda and Christina Rollins?

They came in the next morning at seven to regroup and make a plan for the day. The group of protesters outside the precinct had reassembled and the news vans were back. The good news was that there hadn't been another murder. They thought the perp had yet to find another couple that fit his type. They hoped they could stop him before he did. They left the precinct at seven twenty to head over to the cafe the victims frequented. Benson and Amaro took a table in the back so they could see the entire place. Fin took a seat by the door so he could see the outside tables as well as anyone coming and going. Rollins and Reyes had a table in the middle. Reyes faced the back of the cafe and had eyes on Nick and Liv while Rollins faced the front with eyes on Fin. They watched everyone, looking specifically for a white man in his forties that paid a little too much attention to the lesbian couples. They'd been there for an hour and had nothing so far. Reyes decided to take this opportunity to talk to Rollins about the chat they had the night before.

"So, are we gonna talk anymore about this?" she asked.

"About what?" Rollins asked confused.

"About the lesbian crush you have on me" she clarified. Rollins laughed.

"I do not have a crush on you. I already told you, I'm not gay". Reyes could tell that Rollins was telling the truth about her being straight. But straight or not, she could also tell that Rollins had a crush on her. She just wanted her to admit it.

"Look, Rollins, I get it. You're straight. Good for you" she said sarcastically. "But don't lie. You have a crush on me".

"No, I don't" Amanda said getting angry with Reyes' persistence. Her voice raised slightly gaining the attention of some of the other people in the cafe, including their teammates. "I don't" she said in a softer tone.

"The lady doth protest too much, methinks".

"Come again?" she asked.

"You say you don't have a crush on me but you feel the need to keep saying it over and over which means you really do have a crush on me" she said explaining the Shakespearian quote. Rollins rolled her eyes and picked at the muffin in front of her. "I understand if the feelings you're having are scary for you but you don't have to lie about them" she said nicely.

"Ok" she said clearing her throat, "Maybe I do have some feelings that I don't quite understand...but I'm not a lesbian" she added quickly.

"You're still protesting" Reyes said in a teasing voice. Rollins rolled her eyes again and got up from the table. "Ok...I'm sorry" Reyes said quickly, hoping she'd sit back down.

"I need to go to the bathroom". She turned and walked back in the direction of Benson and Amaro's table. "Nothing's going on here" she whispered as she walked past. Benson sighed and ran her hand through her hair.

"I know" she whispered back even though Rollins had already disappeared into the bathroom. She stood at the sink and looked at herself in the mirror. She really didn't know what was going on with her. She'd never been attracted to another woman before. What was it about Christina that had her stomach in knots and her mind going a million miles per second? Whatever it was she didn't have time to figure it out right then. She needed to pull herself together and get back to work. She took a deep breath and left the bathroom. She went back over to the table and sat down with Chris.

"Ok, listen" she started, "I'll admit it. I have a crush on you". Chris smiled smugly knowing that she'd been right and had gotten Rollins to admit it. "I don't know why or where these feelings are coming from but they're there and I can't make them go away but I'm like you. I think romances in the work place are a bad idea; not that I want a romance with you" she quickly added. Reyes laughed at her. She really had no idea what to do with the feelings she was having for her. "Whatever it is, I'll figure it out and I'll get past it".

"Ok" she said simply. Rollins was expecting a little more of a reaction from her that just "ok".

"That's it? You pester me for ten minutes about this stupid crush and I finally admit it and all you have to say is "ok"?"

"Well, what else do you want me to say? I don't want a romance with you either" she joked. She couldn't deny that she was attracted to Rollins but she didn't want to date her. She didn't want to date anyone. She'd known for a long time that she was gay but she wasn't out to her family. Her mother is very catholic and everyone else seemed to follow her lead. Plus she had heart problems. Chris didn't want to do anything to upset her. "We'll be fine. Let's do our jobs and uh, you know, whatever". She was about to further explain that "whatever" when she saw Benson and Amaro get up from they're table and start walking towards them.

"Captain wants us back" she whispered as she walked by. They got up and followed them, along with Fin, out of the cafe and back to the precinct. The protesters were still out in full force, yelling and hoisting there signs in the air. They seemed to be growing more and more combative. Uniformed officers were now taking shifts outside for crowd management. When they walked into the squad room, they could see the chief of detectives in Captain Cragen's office, along with a couple other suits they didn't recognize. Of course, Reyes didn't recognize any of them because she'd never met the chief. They sat at the briefing table and waited for the captain to come out and tell them why he'd called them back.

"What's that about?" Reyes asked looking through the captain's office window at what looked like an intense conversation.

"Nothing good" Benson answered, also watching the scene through the office window. After about five more minutes, the captain walked out of his office along with the chief and the two other men.

"Detectives" the chief said greeting them. They all stood up, except for Reyes. Rollins slapped her on the shoulder and she stood up with everyone else. "Sergeant" he said addressing Olivia.

"Chief" she said returning his greeting.

"I understand this case you all are working is a real doozy" he said. "I'm sure you're all working hard but frankly we're not seeing the results we'd like" he said.

"I'm guessing the press out front are the kind of results you're not wanting to see" Reyes said. Rollins slapped her again and gave her a glare. "What?" she asked like she didn't know she'd done anything wrong.

"Chief, this is Detective Christina Reyes. She came to us from California" Cragen said introducing them.

"Well, detective, you're right. We don't like the press attention, the gay coalition group or the religious conservatives that are protesting outside the precinct right now" he said addressing her statement. "They don't feel like enough is being done to stop these murders and from the lack of progress I'm seeing on this case, I'm questioning if they're right".

"You can take over if you want" she smart alecked.

"I'd watch my tone if I were you, detective" he said angrily. "Just as quickly as you came here, it can be arranged for you to leave again" he threatened. As much as she wanted to come back at him with a sly retort, she needed to pick her battles. She was smart enough to know that this was a battle she didn't want to fight. So she stood there, stared him down, and bit her tongue. "Now, we've come up with a new plan". They all looked at Captain Cragen and got the sense that he wasn't on board with this "new plan". They all waited quietly for him to explain what this plan was. "An undercover operation" he finally said. "We want this guy in custody as soon as possible so we're gonna put some bait out there for him".

"Wait. You're taking the case from us?" Benson asked angrily.

"All due respect chief, we feel like we have a solid plan and we're working it" Amaro said. None of them wanted the case to go to another team. They'd caught it and had put in a lot of hours already. "We can make this case if we just..."

"Relax detectives. I'm not taking the case from your squad" he said calming their protests. "It'll be you all, specifically Detectives Rollins and Reyes" he said turning towards the pair.

"Qué?" Reyes said. She knew she heard her name but she couldn't have possibly just heard her name. She thought she was done with undercover operations when she gave two years of her life to an undercover role in narcotics back in California. She had a teenage sister who was acting out, a brother and father who couldn't take care of themselves if their lives depended on it, and a sick mother to take care of. She couldn't go undercover again.

"That's right. We've reviewed the case file and you two fit the type of victims he's looking for. You already know the case, you're invested. I'm confident that you all, under the direction of Captain Cragen, can make this case" he said. Reyes chuckled uncomfortably at the idea of going undercover as a couple with Rollins, especially after the conversation they'd had earlier.

"So why can't we be involved in the case and you find other detectives that fit his type?" Reyes asked.

"Why would we do that when we have you?"

"Who says you have me?" she shot back.

"Reyes" Cragen said in a warning tone.

"What? We don't get a say?" she asked gesturing between herself and Rollins.

"No" the chief said stepping forward, "You're doing it. That's an order".

"How do you expect this to work?" she asked. He just stood there and looked at her confused by the question. "These were couples, real couples. That means they lived together, went out together. They were intimate, at least affectionate in public. Not to mention his affinity for cameras so I'd assume he likes their private affection as well. He picked them when they were out together doing couple things and they were married. Rollins and I..." she said pointing back and forth between them, "not a couple, not married. We barely know each other. How do you expect us to get this guy to believe that we're in love?"

"Well, that's up to you to figure out" he said as if it weren't his problem.

"Of course it is" she said annoyed.

"Reyes" Cragen said again in a warning tone.

"No, Captain" the chief said stopping him, "it's alright. Speak your piece, detective".

"It's so easy for you to give out orders; tell us what we have to do because you just get to go back to your office and sit behind your desk. We're the ones who have to step out of our lives and give pieces ourselves to make the case. You...you don't have to give anything" she said clearly not a fan of his. Her chief back home would've never put any of his detectives in situations they weren't comfortable with. He cared more about them and getting the job done right than he cared about politics. "What if he does pick us? Who's to say he won't beat and rape us and slit our throats and set us on fire like the other three couples? Oh, but you don't have to worry about that right? It's not your problem?" She was more than angry about his disregard for the sacrifice they'd be making and the danger they'd be putting themselves in. It was so typical; just like a suit. "The particulars didn't matter, you just wanted the press off the front steps and you don't care what we have to do to make it happen. You just get to go home and rest easy".

"That may all be true but this is what you signed up for detective".

"What is this, the fucking army or something?" She was pissed off and she wasn't thinking through the things that were coming out of her mouth.

"Reyes, out of line" Cragen said stepping in.

"I can't go undercover" she said calmly despite her anger. "You want to send me back to California...fine. But either way, you're gonna have to find someone else". She walked off and went upstairs to the crib, slamming the door behind her. They were all shocked by Reyes' reaction. Rollins couldn't help but to feel insulted that Reyes didn't want to even pretend to be in a relationship with her.

"I'll go talk to her" she said following Reyes upstairs. She opened the door and found Chris sitting on one of the beds. She looked up when she heard the door open and saw Rollins stick her head in. She just looked back down at the floor and anxiously tapped her foot, thinking about what she'd done. Amanda shut the door behind her and went over to sit next to Chris on the bed.

"How deep is the shit I'm in?" she asked. Rollins laughed.

"Uh, I don't know. I think everyone was trying to process what happened. The chief is dumbfounded by you" she said with a chuckle.

"I think just plain dumb sums him up pretty well" she said getting another laugh from Amanda.

"Look, I know you said you don't want a relationship with me but you have to admit, us going undercover isn't a bad idea. And it wouldn't be serious, just pretend..."

"Don't flatter yourself, Rollins" she said interrupting her. "My not wanting to go undercover isn't about you" she said. "I spent the last two years of my life pretending to be someone I'm not so...I'm sure you can understand that I'm not gung ho to do it all over again".

"Well, it's not gonna be two years" Rollins said trying to make her feel better about the situation. "You heard what Huang said. This guy isn't gonna stop until we catch him. So we flush him out, we take him down and then we get back to business as usual" she said like it was no big deal.

"Yeah. That's what they said when they sent me under in Cali. "One month, two tops. We're so close, we just need you to close the deal". One month turned into two then four then a year. Before I knew it, two years had gone by. When we finally made the case and I got back home, my sister was flunking out of high school, my brother had gotten fired from his job and my parents had each had a heart attack" she said sadly. "My father was so stressed out from all the medical bills and the mortgage and my mother was falling apart trying and failing to control my sister. We almost lost the house, my sister almost got arrested, my parents almost died and I didn't know about any of it because I was undercover. I can't do that to them again. They drive me crazy but...they depend on me". She hadn't expected to open up so much to Amanda, or anyone for that matter. But she figured that she couldn't always be so standoff-ish. And she really felt like she and Rollins could be good friends.

"My parents weren't...really around. It was just me and my sister. We had to fend for ourselves. My sister, Kim, she had a lot of problems growing up; mental problems and drugs. A few years ago she met a guy, Jeff, real asshole; special kind of stupid". Chris chuckled at her description of the guy. "He'd beat her up and I'd run him off and then she'd take him right back. You know the drill". Reyes nodded her head knowing the cycle that Rollins was describing. "Anyway, last year, she came for a visit and he showed up, attacked her, and I killed him. Turned out she set the whole thing up".

"Your sister set you up to murder her boyfriend?" she asked in disbelief. Rollins just nodded her head.

"Yeah...and it didn't matter. No matter how she badly she screws up or screws me over, she's family. If she called me tomorrow asking for help, I'd do it" she admitted. They were the same in that respect. Loyalty to family was the utmost important. No matter how much they put her through, Chris couldn't turn her back on them. She'd been hiding what she'd known about herself since grade school just to keep her mother happy.

"This really is the best way to draw this guy out isn't it?" she asked. Rollins nodded her head. Chris sighed heavily, "They don't know" she said looking at Rollins who met her with a look of confusion. "My family. They don't know...that I'm gay". Rollins looked surprised by the admission. "My mother is very...catholic" she said with a light laugh. "We heard it all growing up. No sex before marriage, abortion is a sin, homosexuals are an abomination. If she were one of those protestors, she be on the side with the folks holding up bibles" she joked even though she was serious. "I wonder sometimes what she'd think if I told her. Would she be upset or disappointed? Would she try to pray it out of me? Or would she love and accept me? I just don't know" she said sadly.

"Maybe nows the perfect time for you to find out". It didn't dawn on Rollins until now just how much Reyes probably identified with the victims and how hard it was for her to be on this case. Now they wanted her to put herself out there as a target.

"Part of me is afraid that she'll have another heart attack and die if I tell her". She started to laugh. Once she started she couldn't stop. They sat there for a minute, laughing together. Neither one of them really knew what they were laughing about but it felt good to let it out. Felt a lot better than crying. "Ugh, I guess I should just buck up and do this huh?" she asked. Rollins nodded her head again. "I guess you're gonna get to try out that crush" she joked. Rollins blushed bright red causing Reyes to laugh. "Come on" she said getting up from the bed. "We better go tell them I changed my mind before I get fired". They walked out of the crib together and went to the captain's office. They knocked and waited for him to tell them to come in. They went inside and shut the door behind them.

"Ok" Reyes said, "I'll do it".

"We both will" Rollins said stepping forward to stand next to Reyes. He nodded his head and picked up the phone, dialing a number. He told the chief that they were on board and they'd start working up a plan to send them under immediately. When he got off the phone, he called Benson, Amaro and Tutuola into his office to talk about the operation behind closed doors. They needed to create identities for both Amanda and Christina, secure a house for them, get them rings and discuss how Liv, Nick, and Fin would be worked into the picture so they were around for back up. They needed to work quickly. The sooner they got out there, the better chance they had of hooking the perp and saving another couple from being murdered.

"What about the last name?" Fin asked. He was met with confused looks from everyone. "All the couples shared a last name" he pointed out. Rollins and Reyes looked at each other and thought about which name they both wanted to take. They'd decided to keep their own names, just to make things easier, but now they had to decide on whose last name they wanted.

"Let's flip for it" Reyes said pulling a quarter out of her pocket. "You win and I'll use your last name. I win, you use mine" she said. Rollins shrugged her shoulders.

"Ok" she said.

"Call it in the air". She flipped the quarter up and Rollins called heads. She caught it and put it on the back of her head. She took a breath before revealing which side it'd landed on. "Ugh, heads" she groaned.

"It's settled then. Amanda and Christina Rollins" Cragen said writing it into their profile. "What about rings?" he asked.

"Well, I think I'm good in that department" Reyes said flashing her mother's ring.

"I'm sure I can find something" Rollins said nonchalantly.

"Ok" Cragen said moving along to the next item, "What about living arrangements? Rollins will you move in with Reyes or will Reyes be moving in with you?"

"Ummm, sorry but she can't move in with me" Reyes said shooting down the idea.

"Why not?" Amaro asked nosily. Reyes was picking up really quickly that he liked to stick his nose in other people's business.

"Because I just said so" she smart alecked. Rollins bumped her arm lightly with her elbow. "I already have a full house. There's no room for her" she said making it clear that she was explaining to Capt Cragen and not Amaro.

"Well you'd share a room, right?" he asked. "Married couple". Chris rolled her eyes.

"We can use my place" Rollins said ignoring Amaro's comment.

"Shouldn't we be budgeted for an apartment?" Reyes asked. She knew it was standard to have a pad while undercover. It was too risky to use your own address in case things went south during an operation.

"Yeah, right" Fin said, "You know how cheap the department is. I can put in a call to buddy of mine, see if we can borrow one of the crash pads from narcotics that's not being used".

"Good. Let us know as soon as you get word. In the meantime, Reyes, you can move in with Rollins. Liv, Nick and Fin will be friends from college. That way they're around for back up. Ok. Next up, what do you do for work?" Cragen asked, moving along with creating their profile.

"Uhhh...we could...ummmm" Rollins stammered trying to think of something.

"We own our own business" Reyes suggested. Cragen nodded.

"Ok. What kind of business?".

"Bakery" she said without giving it much thought. "Small, from home. We can make some fake business cards". Everyone looked at her curiously, wondering where she got that idea from. "Ummm, my mother used to run a bakery in California. I helped her out when I was in high school. I can do all the baking and you can book the clients, do the finances", she said looking at Amanda. She nodded in agreement.

"Good. That's settled. Last thing is making you two a believable couple. So tonight, go out, meet people, let yourselves be seen together".

"I know how to be gay. It's blondie here that's gonna need the help" Chris joked.

"Ha ha" she laughed sarcastically. For some reason, Rollins didn't think it'd be too hard to pretend to be in a relationship with Reyes. If she was being honest with herself, she was looking forward to trying it out. Of course, she'd never say it out loud.

"Ok, Chris go home, pack your things. You need to move in to Rollins' apartment as quickly as possible and then go out tonight. All of you. I want you all there as much as possible" he said looking at Olivia, Nick, and Fin. "I don't want them without backup". They nodded their understanding and left his office. "Rollins, Reyes" he said stopping them from leaving, "Stay a minute, will you?"

Benson, Amaro and Tutuola left the Captain's office, shutting the door behind them. Captain Cragen discussed the possibility of the perp choosing them and what that could mean. If he really was using cameras to spy on his victims then they would have to be comfortable in every aspect of their "relationship".

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Reyes asked.

"If you're thinking that I'm saying that the two of you will have to be comfortable being intimate with one another, then yes. I'm saying what you think I'm saying".

"Isn't that against department regs?" she asked trying to come up with something that would get her out of having sex with Rollins.

"Well, technically, yes" he said, "But the chief asked you to go undercover as a couple and that is a part of being a couple". He could see the discomfort in both of their body language and wasn't sure how this would work out. "Listen, I understand that this is uncomfortable for the both of you but you need to do everything necessary to maintain your cover". They both nodded their understanding and turned to leave his office, awkwardly bumping into each other trying to get out of the door. Captain Cragen chuckled as he watched them fumble around each other. "Well, this should be interesting" he said to himself as he put the finishing touches on their profiles. Chris and Amanda gathered their things and left the precinct together to head over to Chris' house and start the moving in process. Amanda had taken the subway to work that day so she rode in Reyes' car.

"Don't pretend you're not excited, Rollins" Chris said looking over at her companion. "You know you want me". Rollins rolled her eyes and looked out the window. Neither one of them could predict where this was going to go but it sure was going to be an interesting ride.


	10. Chapter 10: Making the Move

Chapter 10: Making the Move

Amanda stared out the window the entire ride to Christina's house. Her mind was going over all the things that might happen in the coming days. She was so lost in thought that she didn't notice the car had come to a stop. Chris put the car in park and turned off the engine. She undid her seat belt and opened her door to get out when she looked over and saw Rollins just sitting there.

"Hello. Earth to blondie" she said getting her attention. Rollins rolled her eyes and looked at her.

"Ok, rule number one: don't call me blondie" she said.

"Oh, are we making rules?" she asked. Rollins stared at her a blank expression on her face. "I guess I better start thinking of some, huh?" Rollins just kept staring at her with the same blank expression. "What's wrong with you?" she asked. Rollins seemed to be in a weird mood since they left the precinct. She hadn't said a word the entire drive over to Chris' house. She continued to just sit there silently and stare at her as if she hadn't just asked her a question. "Ok" she said clearing her throat. "Ummm, I'm gonna go pack some stuff. You can wait here or you can come inside. It's up to you" she said. She waited for a minute to give Amanda a chance to decide if she wanted to wait in the car or come in the house with her. Without saying anything, Amanda took off her seatbelt, opened her door, and got out of the car. Chris let out of huff of air and climbed out of the driver's seat. She hit the button for the locks and led the way up to her front door. She unlocked and opened the door, letting Rollins step in before her. She shut the door behind them and started up the stairs then stopped when she realized Amanda was still standing in the foyer.

"Come on" she said looking down at her. She hesitated for a second before starting to climb the stairs. Chris continued up and down the hall to her room. She pulled a couple of bags out of her closet and started packing up her clothes. She heard someone talking in another room and went to see who it was. As she got closer, she recognized the voice. She went over and opened the door. "What the hell are you doing?" she yelled. Jeza practically jumped out of her skin when she heard her sister.

"Ummm, I...You...I was..." she stuttered. She brought her phone up to her ear, "I have to call you back" she said to whoever was on the phone before hanging up. "What are you doing here?"

"Hago las preguntas. Por que no estas en la escuela?" she asked. Jeza looked at her with a stupid expression on her face. "Estoy esperando" she said impatiently.

"I just...didn't feel like going" she said.

"You didn't feel like going?" she asked mockingly. "Since when is it your decision whether you go to school or not?" Jeza looked at her again with a dumb expression. "Jezalyn Esmerelda Reyes, answer me" she said angrily.

"It's not" she said softly.

"That's right. It's not. So get your shit, go downstairs and wait in the living room. You're going to school". Jeza pouted and grabbed her book bag then started to leave her room. Chris stepped in front of her to stop her from leaving. "Phone" she said holding out her hand. Jeza looked like she was about to burst into tears on the spot.

"But" she said starting to protest. The look on Chris' face stopped her from finishing her sentence. She handed over the phone and headed downstairs to wait for Chris to drive her to school. Chris put the phone in her pocket and went back to her room to finish packing. Rollins was sitting on the bed waiting for her.

"Who was that?" she asked. Chris cleared her throat.

"That was my sister ditching school" she said. "So, we're gonna have to make a stop before going to your place". Rollins silently nodded her head. Chris went to the hall closet and grabbed a suitcase to put the rest of her clothes in along with her small jewelry box. She grabbed on of the smaller bags and took it the bathroom to get her toiletries and makeup then went back to her room. "Ok" she said grabbing her bags, "I'm ready". Amanda took one of the bags from her and headed down the stairs. Jeza stood up when she heard someone coming down the stairs only to look up and see it wasn't her sister.

"Who the hell are you?" she asked rudely.

"Go to the car!" Chris yelled. Jeza continued to pout as she snatched up her bag and stomped out the door. Rollins followed the girl out the door while Chris locked up the house. She hit the button to open the trunk for Rollins to put her bag in the back. She threw her other bags inside, closed the trunk then went and got in the driver's seat. She made the drive over to Jeza's school and walked her inside while Rollins waited in the car. Chris told the principal that she'd caught her sister skipping school and to give whatever punishment they normally gave students for skipping. They gave Jeza an hour of detention for each class she missed totaling three hours. The principal handed her progress reports Jeza's teachers had prepared for her. She was in danger of failing two classes which would mean she'd be repeating the eleventh grade. "Ya hablaremos de esto mas tarde" she said holding up the progress reports. "Go to class". Jeza took her detention slips and left the office to go to class. Chris turned back to the principal, "Thank you. Please don't hesitate to call me if she gives you any more problems". They shook hands and Chris left the school and went back to the car. "So I was thinking" she said as started the car, "We should have dinner at my house tonight". Rollins almost gave herself whiplash from snapping her head around so quickly.

"Why?" she asked. The last thing she wanted to do was have dinner with Reyes' family.

"Because you're my wife" she joked. Rollins wasn't amused. "Because I need to tell them that I won't be staying at home for awhile and why and I think it'd be a good idea for them to meet you" she said seriously.

"I don't think that's necessary for what we're trying to do here" she said trying to get out of it. "I know you want to come out to your family but you don't need me to do that" she said.

"I didn't say anything about "coming out" to anyone. I said I need to explain why I won't be staying at home for awhile. I know it'll make them feel better to know who I'm staying with". She pulled out her parking spot onto the street. "So, dinner at my house tonight?" she asked. She stopped at a red light and looked over at Rollins to see she was staring out the window. "Hello" she said trying to get her attention. Amanda just kept silently staring out the window. "Fine, you don't want to talk to me. I get it but unless you want to wander around the city aimlessly for the rest of the day, you should start giving me directions to your apartment". Rollins realized that she'd never told Chris where she lived so she started directing her towards her apartment building. When they arrived, Chris went to the trunk to get her bags. Rollins went right to the door to go upstairs to her apartment. "No, it's fine. I got it" Chris said sarcastically to herself. She closed the trunk and hit the locks before following Rollins inside.

Chris liked the setup of Amanda's place. It was nice and simple, just the right size for one person. If she lived alone, it looked like the kind of place she'd choose. She stood awkwardly in the living room waiting for Rollins to tell her where to put her stuff. As much as she understood her discomfortable with this situation, she was over Amanda's attitude. She didn't like their fake marriage either but they had a job to do and they definitely wouldn't get anywhere if they weren't talking to each other. Rollins came out of the bedroom and sat down on her couch, grabbing the remote and turning on the tv. Chris dropped her bags and grabbed the remote from her and switched the tv back off.

"What the hell" Rollins said annoyed.

"Listen, I don't want to be here anymore than you want me to be but I'm here". She sat down next to her on the couch before continuing, "I know you like me and you have your issues with that but you need to put that aside and focus on the reason that we're here. There is a psycho out there murdering innocent women and it's our job to stop him. So are we gonna do this or not?" she asked. Rollins bit the inside of her cheek and thought about what Reyes was saying. She was nervous about the prospect of a relationship with Christina. Even though it was just pretend, to some extent it had to be real otherwise it wouldn't be believable. She hadn't had enough time to work through her feelings for Chris and understand where they were coming from. But Chris was right. They had a job to do so she had to put her own insecurities aside and focus on the task at hand.

"Yeah, ok" she finally said. "I'll go make some room for you in the closet". She got up from the couch and went into her bedroom. Reyes took a deep breath and slowly released it. As much as she was dreading this assignment, she was interested to see how this would work out. She wondered how well they would work together as a couple, if people would find them believable, and if the perp would even be interested in them.

"Hey" Rollins said pulling her out of her thoughts, "You can come put your stuff away". Chris stood up and grabbed bags and suitcase then headed into the bedroom. Amanda had moved her clothes to one side of the closet and cleared out a couple of drawers for her. She sat her stuff on the bed and started to unpack. Amanda came over and helped her hang up her clothes. "So, I was thinking about what you said and you're right. We've got a job to do and we should put our personal feelings aside to get it done" she said.

"_We_" Chris said looking at her sideways.

"Ok, _I_" she corrected. "I already told you that I'm not sure about my feelings for you or where they're coming from. Now I have to be married to you. I just...I wish I'd had time to sort it all out before being put in this position".

"Oh, I haven't put you in any positions yet, Rollins" she joked causing her to blush.

"You know what I mean" she said. Chris laughed and nodded her head. She put the last of her clothes away and put all of her toiletries and all her other feminine products in the bathroom. Amanda put Chris' suitcase and bags in the front closet then went back to the bedroom. She went over and sat next to Chris on the bed. "So, how's this gonna work?" she asked.

"Uh, well, we have to make people believe that we like each other. Love...each other" she corrected. "It should be an easy task for you. Me on the other hand..." Rollins playfully jabbed her in the side with her elbow. "Ow" she said laughing.

"Can you ever be serious?" she asked.

"Occasionally".

"Can this be one of those occasions?" Chris sighed and cleared her throat.

"Fine" she said. "I guess the first thing we have to do is get you a ring". She got up and went over to her jewelry box. She picked out the purity ring her father had given her when she was sixteen and went over to Rollins, getting down one knee. Rollins playfully pushed her over and laughed. She got up and sat next to her, handing her the ring. "That should fit you". Rollins tried the ring on and it fit her finger perfectly. "So, ummm, about dinner tonight" she started. "You don't have to come if you don't want to".

"I want to" she said.

"Ok" Chris said surprised that she'd agreed to go. "I think we should talk" she said.

"Ok" Rollins said with a laugh, "Talk about what?" she asked.

"About us". Rollins looked confused. "We should use this time to get know each other better. For all intents and purposes this has to seem like a real relationship. If we're right about him using cameras to spy on his victims then we have to be "in character" all the time. It'll seem a little phony if he sees us asking each other about things that a married couple would know".

"Yeah, ok". Chris looked at her like she wasn't convinced that Rollins was on board. "Look, Reyes, I just...I'm straight. I've always been sure of that and then you come along and I...I don't know" she said rubbing her hands over her face.

"You need to get more comfortable with the idea of being in a relationship with me" she said. "Listen, dating a woman isn't all that different from dating a man. Except if you're lucky you like the same clothes and have the same body type and shoe size" she said with a laugh. "The best relationships start with friendships. Granted we don't have as much time to build a friendship as most couples do but we have to make the best of this whole thing. Like you said, it won't be for long". She could tell that she was going to have to be sensitive to Rollins' feelings, something she wasn't very good at doing. But this case was important to her so she would try her best. "Let's start with something simple, like our names. You can't call me Reyes anymore. It's Chris" she said with a smile. Amanda smiled back but her body was stiff and uncomfortable. "Relax" Chris said rubbing her shoulder. "Look, it's almost five so let's call Olivia, Nick and Fin to make a plan for us to go out tonight and then we can go to dinner at my house. We can spend all day tomorrow getting to know each other" she suggested.

"Ok" she said agreeing to the plan. Chris got up from the bed and went to get her phone. They made a conference call to Benson, Amaro and Tutuola to make plans for their night out. They let Chris and Amanda know that TARU was going to set up a connection at the apartment. If there was any video set up, they'd be able to intercept it and hopefully trace it back to his IP address. Fin let them know he was still looking into getting them a crash pad from narcotics. They agreed to meet at the club at nine and stay for an undetermined amount of time. Once they had everything worked out, they left the apartment and made the drive back to Rae's house. When they went inside, the aroma made it evident that dinner was already underway. Chris took Amanda's hand and walked her into the kitchen expecting to find either her sister or brother there, only to see her mother. She quickly let go of her hand and walked over to the stove.

"Mama, what are you doing?" she asked taking the stirring spoon from her.

"I'm cooking dinner" she said.

"You know you shouldn't be on your feet. Go sit down" she said. Her mother turned around to go into the living room and saw Amanda standing there. "Mama, this is Amanda. We work together. She'll be having dinner with us. Amanda this is my mother, Gloria" she said over her shoulder.

"Encantada de conocerte" she said with a smile.

"She doesn't speak spanish, mami" Chris said from the kitchen.

"Oh, sorry" she said. "It's nice to meet you".

"Nice to meet you too, ma'am" Amanda said returning her smile. She invited Amanda to sit down with her in the living room. Chris covered the spaghetti cooking on the stove and checked on the bread in the oven before going through the living room to the bottom of the stairs.

"Roberto, Jezalyn, get down here now" she yelled up. She went over and stood by the couch next to her mother. A minute later, her brother and sister came downstairs to see what she wanted. "What are you two doing up there?" she asked. They both shook their heads and said nothing. "So why is mami down here cooking dinner?" She stood there and waited for an answer but neither of them said anything. Jeza stared at Amanda, recognizing her from earlier that day. "Hello. Am I talking to myself?"

"I don't know" Robbie said. "She wanted to cook dinner".

"Both of you know she's not supposed to be on her feet. You're letting her slave away at the stove cooking dinner for you and you're upstairs doing nothing" she said angrily. They both just stood there looking at her like she was speaking gibberish. "Both of you in the kitchen. Finish cooking and set up the table. And you" she said looking at Jeza, "are grounded. You understand me?"

"What!?" she yelled. "That's not fair. Mom" she said looking towards her mother, hoping she'd come to her defense.

"Escuche a su hermana, Jeza" she said. Chris folded her arms over her chest and gave a smug look. Jeza groaned and pouted her way to the kitchen to finish cooking dinner. While they waited, Gloria bombarded Chris and Amanda with questions, mostly about their dating lives. She made it abundantly clear that she was ready for her daughter to get married and give her grandchildren. Jeza and Robbie finally called them to the table to eat. Chris called up the stairs for her father to come to dinner. She introduced him to Amanda and they all sat down to eat. It was getting late and they had to go home to get ready for the bar so Chris decided it was time to tell her family about her leaving.

"Ummm, so I won't be staying here for a little while" she started. "I'm gonna be working on an important case so I'll be staying with Amanda. That's why I brought her tonight so you could meet her". She paused and waited for them to say something but nobody seemed to have anything to say. "She stays here in the city so I won't be far. We might be moved soon, though. I'll try my best to get word to you if that happens. And you can call me if you need me. I can't promise that I'll be able to but I'll try my best to be around".

"What's the case?" Robbie asked.

"You know I can't talk about that" she said. They'd been through this before when Chris went under in California. All she could say was that she was leaving, that she'd be back as soon as she could, and not to worry about her.

"Don't be mysterious, mija" her father said. "This is about those lesbians being murdered isn't it?" he asked. Chris opened he mouth to answer but he continued talking. "I saw it on the news, all those people protesting outside your work. They showed pictures of the women. You look like them".

"Papa" she said sternly before looking over at her mother who looked mortified.

"So you two are going to be off playing like dykes together" Robbie Jr asked. Robbie Sr reached over and slapped him on the back of the head.

"Have some respect for your sister, eh?" he said chastising him.

"Is it true, mija?" Gloria asked nervously.

"I can't talk about the case, mama" she said softly.

"That's a yes" Robbie said. Chris glared at him and their father's hand came up to hit him again but he ducked. Gloria started to get up from the table.

"Where are you going?" Chris asked.

"To get your bible" she answered. "If it's true that you're going to be doing...that stuff then you're going to need it". Amanda shifted uncomfortably in her chair and took a sip of water. She felt horrible for Chris that her mother thought she'd need her bible to make it through this case. She was experiencing what Christina meant when she said her mother was "very catholic".

"Mama, don't" Chris called after her but Gloria waved her off and continued up the stairs.

"You need to tell her, mija" her father said.

"Tell her what?" she asked looking over at her father. He gave her knowing look and she knew immediately that he knew. She was confused because she thought she'd always done a good job of being discreet. Her father saw the wheels in her mind turning as she tried to figure out how he'd figured her out.

"Hey, I know my children" he said with a soft smile. Chris smiled back and she relaxed knowing she had the support of her father. Jeza and Robbie sat there looking confused, trying to figure out what it was that Chris needed to tell their mother. Gloria came back down the stairs and sat Chris' bible on the table next to her plate.

"There. Take it with you. It'll keep you safe" she said as she sat back down. She saw Chris open her mouth to argue. "You need it Christina. Para proteger su alma".

"Her soul is fine, Gloria" her father said speaking up for her.

"No, it's not Roberto" she argued.

"Christina tell your mother" he said. Chris really didn't think this was the time to get into to all of this. She and Amanda needed to get going but she had a feeing her father wouldn't let her leave until she told her.

"The bible's not gonna help me, mama" she said.

"What do you mean? Of course it will". Chris shook her head. "Why not?"

"Because I'm gay. I'm a lesbian. The bible hasn't helped me before it's not going to help me now" she said bluntly. Tears filled Gloria's eyes and she shrugged her shoulders.

"What did I do wrong?" she asked. Chris rolled her eyes.

"I don't have time for this mami" she said dismissing her question. "Both of you are going to have to step up and help out around the house" she said talking to her brother and sister. "What happened last time _cannot_ happen again" she said firmly.

"Does this mean I can have my phone back?" Jeza asked.

"Is that all you can think about?" Gloria asked angrily. "Everything that's going on. Your sister is a..." she paused like the word lesbian couldn't pass her lips. She decided to change what she was going to say. "She's leaving to go do a dangerous job and your only question is about your phone".

"Well I need it" she snapped.

"Hey! Watch it" Chris said glaring at her sister. "And no, you can't have your phone back. You're grounded. That means no phone, no computer unless it's homework, no going out after school or on weekends" she said laying out the rules.

"For how long?"

"Until I'm satisfied with your gpa" she said.

"How will know? You'll be gone" she said challenging her.

"Oh, I'll know. Try me" she challenged her right back. Jeza accepted that she was fighting a losing battle and kept her mouth shut. Chris looked at her watch and saw it was seven forty. "We have to go" she said grabbing hers and Amanda's plates, taking them to the kitchen. Amanda got up from the table and pushed her chair in. Gloria gave Amanda a heated glare until Chris came back in to the dining room and told her stop looking at her like that. "I'm not gay because of her" she said. Her mother pleaded with her to take the bible but she refused. She hugged and kissed everyone goodbye, even a reluctant Jeza, before leaving and heading back to Amanda's apartment to get ready to go out.

**Spanish- English Translations**

**Hago las preguntas. Por que no estas en la escuela- **I ask the questions. Why aren't you at school?

**Estoy esperando**- I'm waiting

**Ya hablaremos de esto mas tarde**- We'll talk about this later

**Encantada de conocerte**- Nice to meet you

**Escuche a su hermana**- Listen to your sister

**Para proteger su alma**- To protect your soul


	11. Chapter 11: Getting Comfortable

Chapter 11: Getting Comfortable

Luckily they were both low maintenance women because they were running late. They took turns taking quick showers before getting dressed. Amanda decided on wearing black jeans and black lace top with a black bra underneath. She pulled her hair up in a messy bun and put on a light layer of make up. Chris wore a sleeveless nude dress that stopped at her mid thigh. She'd accidentally gotten her hair wet in the shower causing her to have patches of curls. Instead of straightening her hair again, she just put her hands under water and ran them through her hair, then brushed it out so her hair was completely curly. Just like the other night, they hadn't planned it but they ended up matching each other perfectly. They were the yin to each other's yang. Somehow, they just seemed to work together. Chris was in the bathroom putting the finishing touches on her look when Amanda came over and leaned against the door frame.

"You nervous?" Chris asked.

"Nervous about what?"

"About going to a gay bar...with a lesbian...as your wife?" she asked. She looked at her through the mirror for some indication of what she was feeling but Amanda wouldn't meet her eyes. "Hey" she said turning to face her, "You shouldn't be nervous. What's the worst thing that can happen?"

"I don't know. I'm not too thrilled at the prospect of being hit on all night by women who think I'm gay" she said.

"So, if you get hit on just say you're taken. In my experience, women are much more accepting of rejection than men. I've never had a woman who didn't take no for an answer the first time. And if there is a woman who thinks she's too good to hear the word no, you have me to protect you" she said on kind of joking. "It'll be fine" she said trying to reassure her. "And as for all the other stuff" she said moving closer to Amanda. She put her mouth directly by her ear, "I'll be gentle" she whispered. She walked out of the bathroom and went to the closet to grab her small clutch to put her phone, keys, id and credit card in. Amanda followed her.

"What other stuff?" she asked. She was trying to sound casual with her question but Chris knew she was freaking out on the inside.

"We're a couple, remember? That means holding hands and kissing and making people think that we're interested in having sex with each other" she said.

"I'm not interested in having sex with you" Amanda said quickly. Chris rolled her eyes.

"Come on, Amanda. You don't have a crush on me because you think I have a nice personality and that I'm a good person. You have a crush on me because you find me physically attractive" she said. Amanda opened her mouth to argue but Chris didn't give her a chance to say anything. "I know you're still working on accepting that but like I said before, you don't have to lie about it. I'm not judging you. I understand where you are because I've been there. I know what it is to have feelings that you don't understand and that you didn't ask to have; that you'd rather not have. But you have them. The longer you fight it, the harder this is gonna be". She wanted to make this as easy as possible for the both of them. Getting Amanda to accept the feelings she had for her was the first step. She was used to having no strings attached encounters so this was nothing to her. Granted, this being a co-worker complicated things just a bit but she just put that aside and thought of this as business as usual. She didn't know anything about Amanda's dating life other than she didn't date women and that alone was making this an uphill battle. She needed to figure out how to get Amanda interested in physical part of their relationship. Then it dawned on her. Amanda was far from the first "straight" girl she'd been with and it was always the same. They just wanted to know what it was like to be with a woman. It was curiosity plain and simple.

"Depending on how long it takes us to get this guy" Amanda said pulling Chris out of her thoughts, "I know it'll have to happen eventually. I just...I wish I had more time to wrap my head around it".

"And you will" Chris said. "It's not gonna happen tonight. All that'll happen tonight is some hand holding and maybe a few kisses here and there. If it helps you can just think of some hot guy instead of thinking of me. I think you'll feel better once you get the first kiss over with" she said. She stepped closer to her and put her hand one side of her face then brought their lips together. She initiated the kiss, knowing that Amanda wouldn't make the first move but thought it best to let Amanda decide if it would go any further. Amanda was caught off guard by the kiss at first, which she guessed was what Chris intended. It took a few seconds for her mind to register what was happening. She took in the warmth that came over her from their bodies being so close and the softness of Chris' lips against her own. Finally she relaxed and let her lips part. She lightly caressed Chris' bottom lip with her tongue then slipped it into her mouth when her lips parted. The kiss was sweet and gentle, just how Amanda imagined it would be. She'd never admit to Chris that she'd imagined it but she had, many times. The kiss finally ended and Chris looked into Amanda's deep blue eyes. "See. That wasn't so bad, was it?" she asked in a whisper. Amanda took a step away and turned around to hide the blush that came over her.

"We should go" she said clearing her throat, "We don't want to be late". She walked out of the bedroom and left Chris standing there. Chris took a deep breath and let it out before following Rollins out of the bedroom, out of the apartment and down to the car.

They made the drive to the bar in complete silence. Chris took occasional glances over at Amanda who was staring out the window in a daze. She wondered what she was thinking about but decided not to ask. She just gave her some time to be inside her head and work through her feelings on her own. It was probably better that way. The less Chris had to hear Amanda's feelings the less chance she had of saying the wrong thing. They pulled up to the bar with a couple of minutes to spare. Chris found a parking spot on the crowded lot and turned off the engine. She took the keys out of the ignition then just sat there, waiting for Amanda to be ready.

The entire drive over, Amanda analyzed the kiss she shared with Chris earlier. It was sweet and gentle and spontaneous and better than any kiss she'd ever shared with a man. The more she thought about it the more confused she became. How could this just come up out of nowhere? How could she go through twenty nine years of her life not knowing that she could be so attracted to another woman? It just didn't make sense to her. But Chris was right. No matter how much she didn't understand her feelings or how much she didn't want to feel them, they were there. It was time for her to accept it. She had to accept it if she wanted to do her job. She took a deep breath and reached for the door handle, pulling it and pushing the door open. Chris followed her lead and got out of the car, hitting the locks then putting the keys in her clutch. As they were walking through the parking lot the front of the bar, Chris reached out and grabbed Amanda's hand, interlocking their fingers. Amanda realized what she was doing and quickly pulled her hand away, not wanting anyone thinking they were together. She immediately regretted it remembering that people thinking they were together was the objective. Chris was getting tired of dealing with Rollins' attitude about this situation. Her fear of anyone thinking for a second that she might be gay was starting to make Chris think she was a little homophobic.

"Alright, that's it" she said angrily, "I'm done trying to be nice about this. Whatever you have going on in your head about what we have to do, you need to get rid of it or get over it; I don't care. We have a job to do. You need to stop thinking about yourself. You have plenty of time to do that once this case is over. For the time being, you need to think about Jessica and Rachel, Lauren and Isabelle, Hallie and Kaitlyn, and any other potential vics this bastard has his eyes on". She stood in front of her and waited for her to say something. Amanda took a deep breath and let it out slowly, then nodded her head. She reached out and took Chris' hand in her own and they walked towards the bar entrance. As they rounded the corner, they saw Liv, Nick and Fin waiting for them.

"Wow" Olivia said as they walked over, "You guys look great". They shared a quick glance and then looked back at their colleagues.

"Thanks" Amanda said. "So y'all ready?" she asked. They all nodded their heads and took out their ids to show to the bouncer. When they got inside they found a booth towards the back of the bar and sat down. Nick got the first pitcher of beer for them to share and they talked quietly among themselves about the case. Fin told them he'd found an apartment they could use. It would be available for them to move in in a couple days. Instead of hooking up the trap at Amanda's apartment, TARU was putting one on the wi-fi in their new place. It would all be set up before they moved in. The goal was that if the perp hooked up a video feed using the wi-fi from the building they'd be able to intercept it and see exactly what he was seeing. That information made Amanda all the more uncomfortable. Not only did she have to get comfortable with being intimate with Chris, she had to get comfortable with the idea of other people watching. Chris saw the discomfort wash over her partner and couldn't help feeling bad for her. She knew this was a lot for her to handle and as much as she wanted Rollins to suck it up and get on with the mission, she wanted her to know that felt for her and what she was going through. She took her hand and gave it a sympathetic squeeze. Amanda smiled at the gesture.

Once they were all up to speed on the most recent developments, they put the work talk to bed and took on the roles of old college friends. They were talking and laughing like they'd all known each other for years and Amanda was slowly settling into the role of Chris' wife. It was surprising to Chris seeing as how Amanda didn't even want to hold her hand half an hour earlier. She just figured the two beers Amanda had so far had relaxed her. Amanda occasionally touched Chris' hair or leaned her head on her shoulder. She even had her hand on her thigh underneath the table. That's how Chris was sure that Amanda was getting more comfortable with the idea of being with her. The touching of the hair and her head on her shoulder were both things that other people could see, outward gestures that would make people think they were together. But nobody could see her hand under the table. That touch was just for her. They'd been at the bar for about an hour and a half when a red head came over stood next to Chris. She touched her hair and licked her lips while she looked Christina over.

"Can I buy you drink?" she asked in a sexy tone. Amanda didn't know where it came from but she had an overwhelming desire to protect what was hers. Chris was about to decline the woman's offer when Amanda spoke up.

"I don't think so hon" she said with her southern drawl. "I can buy all the drinks she wants". She put an arm possessively around Chris, flashing the ring on her third finger. The red head got the message loud and clear and quickly moved away from the table.

"That poor girl" Olivia said, "Amanda just scared her half to death" she joked.

"Yeah, she's probably gonna spread the word to stay away from this table" Fin said getting a laugh from everyone. Chris was confused by the sudden change in Amanda but she wasn't complaining. She just hoped it didn't go back to the way it was once she sobered up. A couple more women came over to their table within a thirty minute time span, all trying to hit on Chris. Amanda quickly shut it down, same as she had the first time. She was laying it on thick with the touching and whispering in Chris' ear and laying her head on her shoulder. Chris could barely keep up with all the affection Amanda was showing. Then, out of nowhere, Amanda reached over and put her hand on Chris' face, turned her head towards her and started to kiss her. Chris went along with it so well no one would've ever known that she was freaking out in her head. Benson, Amaro, and Tutuola felt like they were intruding on what was a private moment. They couldn't help but think how natural this was coming together for their colleagues and questioned whether they'd had something going on before this assignment came up. Maybe that was why Rollins was so uncomfortable at the restaurant when Chris' "friend" confronted her.

"Alright you two" Fin said getting their attention, "get a room". They ended the kiss and went back to their conversation. They didn't notice the clean shaven, nicely dressed white man at the end of the bar whose eyes were fixed on Chris and Amanda. Probably because by that time, they'd gotten the attention of almost everyone in the bar. They spent another hour there before calling it a night. Unlike Amanda, Chris had only had one beer when they first got to the bar, knowing she had to drive them home. They walked to the car hand in hand and Chris helped Amanda into the passenger seat. She put her seat belt on and was about to close the door when Amanda grabbed her by the collar of her dress and pulled her in for another kiss. Now Chris was definitely worried. Amanda was getting a little bit too comfortable playing her wife. She was hoping that it was just the speech she gave her earlier that was behind the sudden change but she knew the change was too drastic for that to be the case.

"Ok...alright" she said pulling herself out of Amanda's grasp and shutting the door. "Ay dios mio" she whispered to herself. She stood there for a moment to get her breath and then walked over to the driver's side and got in the car. She started the car and pulled out of the parking lot, starting the drive back the apartment. Five minutes into the drive, she noticed a dark green four door sedan following them. She decided she'd test them and make sure she was right, taking a few unnecessary turns and before pulling over. Sure enough, the car stayed on her tail, making every move she did.

"Why are we pulled over?" Amanda asked. "This isn't my apartment". Chris pulled back casually pulled back out onto the street.

"Amanda, listen" she said glancing over at her. "Are you listening?" she asked. Amanda could hear the serious tone of Chris' voice and perked up.

"Yeah, I'm listening".

"I'm gonna move the side mirror. Dark green sedan, three cars back" she said as she adjusted the mirror. "Can you see it?" Amanda focused on the mirror until she could see the car Chris was describing.

"Yeah, I got it" she said. Chris stopped the mirror from moving any further.

"It's been following us since we left the bar" she said. They shared a knowing look then Amanda quickly got out her phone. Chris pulled up to the apartment building and parked. The sedan kept moving forward and found a space a little ways down the street. Amanda texted Liv to tell her that they thought they hooked the perp and gave her general description of the car. As they walked up to the building, Chris tried to figure out a way to get a look at the license plates without it being obvious that she was looking at the car. She glanced over her shoulder but couldn't make out anything. It was too dark and he'd parked too far away. Just as she was about to try to sneak another glance, the car pulled out onto the street and drove away. "Damn it" she whispered. Amanda opened the door and they went up the stairs.

"At least we know he's interested" she said as she unlocked the door her apartment. Chris sighed and nodded her head in agreement. They went into the bedroom and started to get ready for bed. Chris stepped out of her shoes and put them in the closet before pulling her dress over her head and hanging it up, leaving her standing there in her bra and underwear. Amanda couldn't help the way her eyes slowly raked over Chris' fit, toned body. She was practically drooling as she watched Chris walk over to the dresser to pull out a t shirt and shorts. Chris felt Amanda staring at her and turned to look over her shoulder. Amanda quickly looked away and went on getting herself ready for bed. Once they were both settled into bed, Amanda leaned over and kissed Chris on the lips, lingering for a few seconds.

"Good night" she whispered before turning over and switching off the light on the night stand. Chris was dumbfounded. Amanda had done a complete one eighty from earlier in the day. She'd definitely gotten much more comfortable with this relationship than Chris. She just hoped she didn't get too comfortable.

"Night" she whispered back. She put the case on hold in her mind and drifted off to sleep. A couple of times throughout the night, Chris felt Amanda scooting close to her. She didn't want to be rude and tell her outright to stay on her side of the bed so she just subtly moved away from her. Amanda wouldn't give up though so finally she just let her scoot in close to her, put her arm around her waist and lay her head on her back. She figured they'd have to sleep like this once that perv bugged the apartment so she might as well get use to it now. She relaxed into the bed and let herself drift into a deep sleep.

The next morning, Amanda woke up to the smell of breakfast cooking in the kitchen. She rolled over and grabbed her phone, checking the time. It was eight thirty in the morning, the time she'd usually be at work. She got out of bed and got a pair of socks to warm her feet before heading into the kitchen. Chris was standing at the stove with her back to her, long black curls cascading down her back. She held a coffee mug in her hand, her hip was set to one side and she tapped one foot on the floor. Amanda's eyes traveled over her toned, tan legs up to her butt, just barely covered by the short shorts she'd worn to bed the night before. Amanda managed to pull her eyes away and walk over to counter.

"Morning" she said finally revealing her presence. Chris turned around, pushing her hair behind her ear and smiled. Amanda's breath caught in her throat as she took in how beautiful Chris looked. First thing in the morning, not dressed, no make up, she still looked gorgeous.

"Morning" she said back. "I got up kind of early so I went to the store, veggified your frig" she said making up a new word. "What do you eat anyway? There was like nothing in there" she said pointing to the refrigerator.

"Uh, well I'm not really here enough to do any cooking" she said. "And when I am here, it's usually take out".

"That's not really healthy" she said very motherly.

"Oh, what, like you cook all the time" she said.

"Well, no but I do have food, healthy food, in my frig and I don't eat take out everyday" she said. Amanda shrugged her shoulders.

"Well, at least I run. It evens things out".

"You run?" she asked. Amanda nodded her head. "God, I hate running. I'm a horrible runner" she said turning back to the stove. She stirred the last of the pancake batter and put two more on the skillet to start cooking.

"We can work on that together if you want" she offered. Chris rinsed the empty bowl and sat it in the sink and put away the pancake mix. Then she went back to the stove and flipped the pancakes before taking the eggs she'd prepared and pouring them in a second skillet to cook.

"I'll think about it" she said looking over her shoulder. She put the pancakes on a plate and took them over to the table along with a plate of veggie bacon and sausage. She finished scrambling the eggs then put them in a bowl and sat them on the table with everything else. She went back and forth getting plates and cups and juice, sitting it all on the table.

"Oh, come on. It's all about conditioning. It's gets easier the more you do it" she said as Chris sat down at the table.

"Ok, let's make a deal. I'll run with you if you do a Jillian Michaels yoga work out with me" she wagered.

"Isn't that the trainer from that weight lose show that yells a lot?" she asked. Chris laughed and nodded.

"Yep, that's the one" she said as she filled her plate with food. Amanda looked at all the food like she'd never seen so much before. "What?" Chris asked.

"Nothing, I just...never had anybody cook me breakfast before. This is nice" she said smiling. They locked eyes and shared what felt like the first genuine moment of their "relationship". Chris finally looked away.

"Well...don't get use to it" she said softening the moment. She grabbed the juice and filled both of their glasses, then noticed that Amanda was still standing at the counter. "Aren't you gonna sit down and eat?" she asked. Amanda walked over to her, leaned down and kissed her sweetly on the lips.

"Thank you" she whispered before kissing her again then went to sit opposite Christina at the table. They ate and shared small talk. There was a nice mood between the two of them. Their conversation was effortless. They were learning a lot about each other without trying. As they were cleaning up the breakfast dishes, there was a knock at the door. Amanda went over and opened the door and was jumped by a dog. She looked just as excited to see the dog as the dog was to see her. She thanked the woman who brought the dog over and shut the door. Amanda looked and saw that Chris didn't seem thrilled about having a pet. She walked back into the kitchen with the dog on her heels. She kneeled down and rubbed the dog's head.

"Chris this is Frannie" she said looking up at her. "Frannie Mae this is Chris" she said rubbing her ears. Frannie barked and went over to sit by Chris, wagging her tail. Chris took that as her saying hello. She leaned down and pet her on head.

"You have a dog?" she asked. Amanda nodded her head. "Why didn't I know this?"

"You didn't ask" she said like it was no big deal.

"Where's she been?"

"I had a neighbor take her while we...got situated" she said. She watched as Chris and Frannie got acquainted with each other. Frannie seemed to like her and she was a pretty good judge of character. "So, I'm guessing this means you're okay with animals?" she asked.

"Do I have a choice?"

"No, not really".

"Well then I guess I'm okay" she said as she continued to play with Frannie. Amanda smiled seeing how well they were getting along. "You wanna go out?" she asked standing up straight. "It's supposed to be a nice day". Amanda nodded her head and turned to head into the bedroom. Frannie chose to stay seated by Chris' feet. "You don't wanna follow your mama?" she asked, looking down at her. Frannie whined and turned her head to lick Chris' hand. "Ok, come on". She walked out of the kitchen to the bedroom and Frannie followed behind her. Amanda changed into jeans, tank top and light jacket. Chris put on jeans and t shirt with a San Bernardino baseball cap. Amanda put Frannie's collar on, hooked on her leash and grabbed the frisbee she loved to play with. They pocketed their phones and keys and left the apartment. They walked towards the park when Amanda spotted a hardware store. She handed Chris Frannie's leash and told her she'd be just a few minutes. Chris looked at her suspiciously but didn't ask what she was going in the store for. A few minutes later, Amanda came back out and handed her a key. Chris looked surprised by the gesture. She didn't really need a key to her apartment seeing as how they'd be moving soon.

"What?" Amanda asked. "We're married right? You should have a key". Chris just smiled and nodded her agreement. She gave Amanda back the leash and took out her keys, adding the key to Amanda's apartment to her key ring. They continued on their walk in silence, just enjoying the nice, cool breeze. There were a lot of people in the park due to it being so nice out. The jog path they were walking on was really crowded. They stayed to the outside lane so joggers could have the inside, per proper jog path etiquette. Other people didn't seem to share the same attitude. Every so often there would be a jogger or power walker that would split between them instead passing on the left. After it happened a fifth time, Amanda had enough. She reached over and took Christina's hand, interlacing their fingers. They held hands for the rest of their walk and no one else cut between them. They found an open space in the grass to run around and throw the frisbee with Frannie. After a while, Frannie started playing with other dogs in the park so Chris and Amanda went to sit down and watch. Christina sat down, putting her hands behind her to prop herself up and bent her legs at the knees. Amanda sat down between her legs and leaned back against her chest. She did so like it was something they did all the time.

"What are you doing?" Chris asked surprised by Amanda taking this position.

"I'm sitting with my wife, enjoying the weather and watching our dog play in the park" she said nonchalantly. _"Our dog"_ Chris thought to herself. She laughed nervously and looked around to see who was watching them. Nobody seemed to be paying them any mind. She took a deep breath and tried to relax and enjoy their time in the park. They stayed for half an hour longer before putting Frannie back on her leash and going home for lunch. Chris decided that they needed to have a talk about what was happening between them. She hadn't expected Rollins to take her words so seriously. She was really acting like they were in a relationship, not just in public but at her apartment too. They hadn't been alerted that their was any video hookup so the private affection wasn't necessary, yet Amanda was initiating a lot of it. That could only mean one thing; she wasn't pretending anymore. That wasn't what Chris signed up for. Amanda really needed to dail it back a little. She didn't know how she would say it without hurting Amanda's feelings and potentially jeopardizing the case but it had to be done.


	12. Chapter 12: Problems

Chapter 12: Problems

When they got back to Amanda's apartment, Chris tried out her key to make sure it worked. It did. They decided on making homemade pizzas for lunch. Amanda had never made them before but Chris did it all the time with her brother and sister. She went through every step with her and an hour and fifteen minutes later they were taking a veggie pizza out of the oven. They went over to the couch and sat down to eat. Frannie jumped up and sat next to Amanda and Chris turned on the tv, flipping through channels before finally landing on ESPN.

"Isn't there a game tonight?" she asked.

"Uh, yeah. Lakers at OKC" she said as she shifted uncomfortably. She'd known about this match up for a while and had thought about placing a bet but couldn't decide which team to go for. Amanda had fallen off the wagon a few weeks before Christina joined SVU. She'd been used, again, by people she thought were on her side and cared about her. She was embarrassed that Lena had played her and used things she said to her in confidence for her own benefit. She was even more embarrassed that her personal business was fodder for the court. She felt like everyone was staring at her when Nate was on the stand testifying about their relationship. Lena tried to frame a man for rape and then killed him when things didn't go her way. Amanda had backed her up, spoken up for her, and all the while she was playing her. She should've seen it but she didn't. She'd barely been holding it together after being framed by her sister. Then a victim that she was close to committed suicide. She saw the signs and she didn't do anything to help her. She felt like she should've done more. Then she was shot by a woman who had it out for Fin. After that, Olivia was kidnapped which gave her something other than herself to focus on. It didn't take long though before she was feeling low again. The Jackie Walker case hit her hard. She knew in her gut that he was innocent and she didn't stick to her guns enough to prevent him from being arrested. In the end, the man's life was ruined. Then Nate and Lena happened. That was the last straw. It was just one thing after another where she always seemed to fall short. She felt like such a screw up.

"Hey" Chris said nudging her with her elbow, "Did you hear me?" she asked.

"Huh?" Amanda said looking at her confused. She'd been deep in thought for a couple of minutes and hadn't heard a word Christina said.

"I said do you wanna stay in tonight and watch the game?" Amanda just sat there and stared at her for a moment. "What?" she asked confused. Amanda shook her head.

"Nothing. Staying in to watch the game is fine with me" she said before finishing her pizza. "Who do you think is gonna win?" she asked casually.

"Uh, I don't know. OKC's having a pretty decent season but you never know" she said. "I always root for the underdog".

"So you think the Lakers are gonna take it?" Chris shrugged her shoulders. Amanda took both their plates and her phone to the kitchen. While she was at the sink, she typed up a text to send her bookie for the game. It read: _Lakers/OKC, double bet, dog_. She hesitated for a moment before finally hitting send. She put her phone in her pocket and opened the frig.

"You want a beer?" she asked over her shoulder.

"It's like two o'clock in the afternoon. You're in drinking mood already" Chris asked looking over at her. In her head she was thinking, "_I just placed a bet for five thousand dollars on a shitty team. Damn right I'm in a drinking mood_". She kept the thought to herself and just shrugged her shoulders. "Sure" she said agreeing to the early afternoon drink. Amanda came back over to the couch with two beers and more pizza. She handed Chris her pizza and beer and sat hers on the table.

"Come on, Frannie let's get you some lunch". Frannie jumped down off the couch and went over to her food dishes. Amanda took her water bowl and filled and grabbed the bag of dog food from the cabinet. She sat her water bowl down and filled her food bowl. "Eat up, girl" she said giving her a pat on the head. She put the dog food away and rejoined Christina on the couch. They watched tv and talked about their families and how they grew up, their hobbies, their favorite foods, colors, their pet peeves. Everything that a married couple would know about each other, they talked about it. Neither one of them was too keen on sharing but for some reason sharing between the came easily.

"So what about your move here from Georgia?" Chris asked. "I mean, I know you said that you needed to get away from "the drama". What was it?"

"Ummm, I was assualted...by my deputy chief. He was drunk and he got a little...out of control. I just needed to get out of dodge, you know". Chris nodded her head in understanding as she listened to Amanda explain her move to New York. "My old captain knew captain Cragen and was able to pull a few strings to get me an interview and the captain said come on up. So here I am".

"You know the problems I told you about with my sister?" she asked. Amanda nodded remembering the talk they'd had at the precinct. "Well she was dating a drug dealer. One my unit had eyes on. I was undercover when they saw her with him. My handler got word to me that she was in trouble but of course there was nothing I could do. I asked him to keep an eye out for her and make sure she knew that he was watching her on my behalf. When we finally had everything we needed to bring the ring down, I got out and I wanted to get her as far away from that lowlife as possible. My captain made some calls and found out there was an opening here; put in a good word for me. So here I am".

They stayed in for the rest of the day just talking like they'd planned the day before. At seven o'clock the game came on and Amanda was going crazy. The Lakers got off to a bad start early on. She couldn't believe she'd bet on them. Chris was really amused as she watched Amanda freak out over the horrible job they were doing. Amanda was practically standing on the couch while she yelled at the tv. Frannie looked like she didn't want to come anywhere near her. Chris reached up and pulled on her pants leg.

"Sit down, jeez" she said laughing, "It's just a basketball game". Amanda sat down and put her elbows on her knees. Her leg was bouncing up and down as she stared at the screen. Everytime OKC scored she'd curse under her breath. "I didn't know you took these games so serious. If I did, I wouldn't have suggested we watch", Chris said. She couldn't believe that Amanda was practically having a nervous breakdown watching this game.

"I'm sorry. I just..." she paused not knowing how to explain her behavior without telling Chris about the bet she'd placed. "I'm gonna get another beer. You want one?" she asked getting up from the couch and heading to the kitchen. She figured she'd just change the subject to avoid having to finish her sentence.

"Yeah, sure" she said. Amanda came back and handed her a beer then sat back down next to her. She held in her yelling as best she could as she watched the horrible game in front of her. The second half of the game, the Lakers started to pick it up. Amanda was shaking she was so nervous. When her team finally took the lead, she wasn't able to contain her enthusiasm. It was the last minute of the game and the Lakers were up by eight.

"Oh, come on! Don't get lazy! Play some D!" Amanda yelled at the tv. The game clock was winding down and her team was holding on to their lead. There was thirty seconds left in the game and the Lakers had the ball. "Just hold on to the ball. All you have to do...is hold on...to the ball" she said as she paced in front of the tv. The game finally ended with the Lakers taking the win by six points. Amanda could barely contain herself. Chris just sat there confused about why this win was such a big deal.

"Ok" she said trying to calm her down, "You're scaring me...and the dog".

"I'm sorry. I'm just excited" she said sitting down again.

"Why?" she asked. "It's just a basketball game. It's not like you had any money riding on it" she said with a laugh. Amanda stiffened up and her smile slightly faded. The change in her mood and posture was very noticable. "Unless...you did have money riding on it" she said. "You placed a bet on that game?" she asked.

"Yeah, I did" she said softly.

"For how much?" Amanda looked down at her hands and kept quiet. "Amanda" Chris said getting her to look at her again. "How much?"

"Five...thousand" she said slowly. Chris looked like she could be knocked over with a feather.

"Fi...five thousand _dollars_?" she asked as if it could be five thousand of something else. Amanda silently nodded her head. "Amanda, you bet five thousand dollars...on the Lakers?" she asked in disbelief.

"Well, you said you always root for the underdog. So I listened to you...and it worked".

"You're a gambler" she said as more of a statement than a question. "How bad is it?" she asked. Amanda gave her a confused look. "Your gambling problem" she clarified. "How bad is it?"

"I...I've got it under control" she said. Chris looked at her clearly unconvinced. "It's ummm...it's bad" she admitted. Chris took a deep breath and slowly let it go.

"Ok" she said calmly. "That was your last bet. At least while we're "married". When we get divorced you can go back to gambling and whatever else it is you do that you can't tell anyone about because it could cost you your job. But while we are married, you will not gamble. You will go to meetings and keep yourself on the straight and narrow. Ok?" Amanda tried to look at anything but Christina as she shook her head in agreement. "Amanda look at me" Chris said moving closer to her. She reached over and took her hand. Amanda's blue orbs snapped up to meet Chris' greens. "I want you to stop" she said sincerely.

"Ok. I'll stop" she said confidently. They sat on the couch for the rest of the night talking about themselves. Amanda told Chris how she got started with gambling. It started back at home and got worse when she got to New York. With everything she saw on the job she needed something to wash it off with at the end of the day. Some cops drank the job away. She gambled. She told Chris about how she'd almost lost her badge a couple years ago when Cragen found out about her extracurricular activities. But instead of firing her, her took her to her first meeting. Then she explained how she'd fallen off the wagon again. Chris listened attentively to Amanda as she told her story. Any thought of telling her that she was getting too serious about their "relationship" left her mind. She couldn't do that too her. It might make her problems even worse. She decided that, for their case and Amanda's sake, she would just go with the flow and keep her mouth shut. They finally went to bed around eleven thirty, each falling asleep on their own sides of the bed. During the night, Amanda moved over and laid her head on Chris' back. Chris thought about what would happen if she slept in a different position than on her stomach. Then Amanda would probably just lay her head on her chest or if she slept on her side, Amanda might spoon her from behind. She had a feeling she might as well start getting used to cuddling.

The next day, Chris and Amanda slept in until the afternoon. When they got up, they got dressed and made plans to meet up with Olivia, Nick and Fin for lunch. They stopped to meet with Amanda's bookie on the way to collect her winnings from the bet she placed the night before. The man looked Chris up and down and questioned Amanda about who she was and why she brought her. Amanda assured him that he didn't need to worry about her and told him that this would be her last time. He scoffed, "Yeah...right" he said unconvinced, "I haven't heard that one before". She didn't say anything back. She just took her money and they left.

"We should've stopped by after lunch" Chris said as they walked, hand in hand, to the diner where they were going to eat. "It's crazy to walk around with that much cash".

"It's fine" Amanda said looking over at her. "I have you to protect me, right?" she asked with a smile. Chris smiled back and opened the door to the diner for Amanda to walk in ahead of her. Fin was already seated at a booth in the middle. They slid into the side opposite him and scanned the menu. The waiter came over and asked for their drinks and then left them alone.

"Good news. Your apartment is ready. Fully furnished, big kitchen for your bakery business, and computer set up for your book keeping. TARU already did their thing" he said giving them the run down. "Your business cards are done too. They're there on the desk. You can move in today".

"Great. I hope you're not busy because you're helping" Chris said.

"At your service" he said pretending to bow as best he could from his seated position. "So, how's it going?" Fin asked. He wanted to know how things were for them being a married couple. They shared a look between the two of them.

"Things are good" Amanda said still looking at Chris. She turned back to Fin, "Things are good" she said again. Fin could tell that Amanda was really comfortable in her role. Chris seemed a little less comfortable. He made a mental note to talk to her about it later. Olivia walked in a few minutes later and then Nick a few minutes after that. They both said they were free to help Chris and Amanda move into the apartment they'd be staying in through the rest of the case. Sitting a table in the back of the diner was the same man that had been watching Chris and Amanda at the bar. He picked the table that would give him an unobstructed view of the couple. They were just what he'd been looking for. Perfect in every way.

"So, have you guys talked to the captain?" Chris asked quietly. She and Amanda hadn't gotten any information about the case since their conversation at the bar and they hadn't heard anything about the car that'd followed them that night.

"Yeah. He was glad to hear that you might have the perp interested" Olivia said. "There haven't been any other victims, no attacks reported".

"Huang thinks you definitely have the guy" Nick said chiming in. "He says that you're probably the couple he's been looking for. Fit all his criteria".

"And what, the other three couples didn't?" Amanda asked.

"He says there's a reason he hasn't taken any more women" Fin said, "He's found you".

"Ok, so why hasn't he made his move then?" Amanda asked, trying to assess how much more time she and Chris would have together before they would go back to being just partners and friends.

"He has to go through his whole routine" Chris said. "The stalking, the cameras. He wants to get to know us". A waiter came over and sat a large glass on the table with two straws and two spoons in front of Chris and Amanda.

"A double strawberry shake for the happy couple" he said nicely.

"Uh, I'm sorry" Chris said looking at the shake, "we didn't order this". He nodded his head.

"I know. It's compliments of the gentleman in the..." he trailed off as he looked over his shoulder to a table in the back of the diner. "Huh, that's funny. He was just there" he said seeing that the man was gone.

"Can you describe him?" Chris asked eagerly.

"White man, no older than forty, nice shirt, slacks, clean shaven. Regular looking guy". Chris got up from the table and went out of the dinner to see if she could spot the man. Of course she ended up seeing more than a few forty year old, nicely dressed, clean shaven white men. Just one of the things that would make this perp difficult to catch. She went back inside and sat down next to Amanda who was still staring at the strawberry shake. Chris pushed it towards the waiter.

"You can take that back". He looked back and forth between them.

"Are you sure?" he asked. Amanda nodded her head for both herself and Christina.

"Ok" he said picking up the shake and spoons, "Your server will be right over to take your orders". He took the shake and walked away towards the kitchen.

"Well, I guess now we know for sure" Chris said looking at Amanda. Amanda rested her chin on Chris' shoulder and Chris pressed her lips against Amanda's forehead. They were both on edge knowing that they had the attention of this perp. The night before, during their talk, they agreed to do everything they could to support and comfort each other through the duration of their undercover stint. Amanda was turning out to be a very affectionate partner. Chris was finding it to be surprisingly easy to play along. Amanda hadn't figured out what it was that Chris would need from her and she didn't know if she ever would. She just knew that when Chris needed her, she would be there. Olivia, Fin, and Nick stared at them, dismayed by how much they looked like a real couple. Olivia wondered if they were getting too comfortable and how that would affect them working together once this was all over. She made a mental note to bring it up with the captain when she checked in with him again. They ate lunch and decided they'd do something later that night, like a normal group of friends. After some debate, they decided to do bowling. It was fun and they could still have food and a few beers if they wanted. Chris made it abundantly clear that she'd just be watching because she was horrible at bowling.

They left the diner and made the drive over to Amanda's to pack up their things and move it to the new apartment. They were all set on living and dining room furniture so they only packed up the bedroom furniture. They emptied the closet, dressers and bathroom cabinets as well as the kitchen cabinets and refrigerator. Luckily, Amanda had flatbed truck for them to put the bed and dressers. They loaded up the cars with everything else and Amanda locked up her apartment. She got in her truck and Chris took Frannie in her car. He'd been watching for almost ten minutes as they went in and out of the building, putting things in the car. When he saw that they were finished and getting into their cars, he did the same and then followed as Fin led the way to their new apartment.

They got right to work moving everything in. Olivia took the kitchen, stocking the refrigerator and cabinets. Fin and Nick insisted on hauling up the bedroom furniture. Chris joked about them wanting to feel like big, strong men. Chris laughed at Frannie, who followed Amanda back and forth to the car as if she wanted to help. The man watched from across the street as Nick and Fin went back and forth carrying the furniture, trying to figure out which apartment they were going to. The most he could make out was that they were going to the second floor. He'd have to do something other than just watch to figure out which apartment was theirs. He saw a kid skateboarding up and down the sidewalk and offered her ten dollars to go and see which apartment was being moved into. He gave her five dollars to start. She casually crossed the street and entered the building. Just a minute later, she came back and told him it was the second floor, "fourth door on the right" she said. After asking if she was sure and receiving a confident nod, he thanked her and gave her another five dollars. She happily took the money and rode away on her board.

Amanda and Chris got to work unpacking all their clothes and putting their things in the bathroom. When she went back out the living room, she noticed a table behind the couch that had pictures of her and Amanda together. She went over to get a closer look and was impressed by how authentic they looked.

"The guys at TARU did those too" Fin said looking over her shoulder. "Pretty good, huh?" he asked. Chris was so absorbed in the images of them together that his question barely registered with her. She absentmindedly nodded her head and gave a barely audible "yeah" before putting the pictures back and going back to the bedroom to help Amanda. Once everything was unpacked Olivia, Nick and Fin said their goodbyes and went to get cleaned up for their planned outing. Chris and Amanda went out shopping for curtains and few things to decorate the walls in their new apartment. When they were done putting everything up, they showered, got dressed and went to meet everyone at the bowling alley.

Chris was good to her word and just sat and watched while everyone else bowled. Fin had invited his son and son in law and their kids out to bowl with them, Brian came with Olivia and Nick brought Zara and Gil. They had two lanes, one without bumpers for the adults and one with bumpers for the kids. After taking his turn, Fin came over and sat next to Chris. He thought he'd take this opportunity, while Amanda was out of earshot, to talk to Christina about the slight discomfort he saw in her at the diner.

"So, what is it?" he asked. Chris had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

"What is what?"

"What's bugging you about being with Amanda?" he clarified. She looked at him with a blank expression then shrugged her shoulders.

"Nothing" she said.

"You're a horrible liar" he said bluntly. Chris laughed and scratched her head.

"Ummm, it's...it's complicated" she said honestly. Olivia looked over to see Fin talking to Chris.

"Fin" she yelled getting his attention, "You're up". He waved her off.

"Let one of the kids have my turn" he said. She nodded and asked the kids who like to take Fin's turn. They all raised their hands but Gil won by arguing that he was the oldest and had the best chance at doing well without the bumpers. "So, what's so complicated?" he asked not letting Chris off the hook. She closed her eyes and let out a huff of air. "Look, if I noticed that you're uncomfortable with Amanda, it won't be long before she notices. Not to mention you have a psycho stalking you who has to believe you're happy together. So...what's so complicated?".

"She's taking this too seriously" she said softly. "She likes me; _really_ likes me. It was confusing for her at first because she doesn't date women but we've talked about it and I guess whatever I said really resonated with her because she is doing this one hundred percent".

"Isn't that a good thing?" he asked. "You have to be a believable couple".

"Yeah, it's a good thing...in public" she added. "But she's doing it in private too. The cameras aren't up yet, there's no reason for her to...be so affectionate" she said.

"Come on, that's not what bothering you" he said unconvinced. "What's the real problem?" Chris hated him poking around in her feelings but it was nice to have someone to process them with.

"I don't hate it" she admitted. Fin nodded his head understanding now what this was about. "I don't do feelings. I'm not the relationship type but...the thought of being with Amanda, really being with her...just doesn't bug me. I mean it bugs me but it bugs me because it's not...bugging me. I've never felt like this before". She'd been trying to convince herself that she was uncomfortable with Amanda because she didn't share mutual feelings but the truth was, she was uncomfortable because the feelings _were_ mutual and that was scary to her. "Anyways, it doesn't matter".

"Why not?" he asked. "If you two like each other, I say go for it". Chris shook her head side to side.

"No, I can't. I don't date straight girls" she said bluntly. "And we work together. It's just...it's a bad idea. I just want to nail this perp and have this, us, be done".

"You gotta do what's best for you but just some advice...don't cheat yourself out of a good thing" he suggested. "What you could have with Amanda...that's a good thing". He gave her a pat on the shoulder and went over to rejoin the game, leaving Chris to think about what he'd just said. A few minutes later, Amanda came over and sat next to her.

"Hey" she said smiling.

"Hey" Chris said softly. Amanda could tell something was bothering her.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing" she answered. "Just...thinking". Amanda put her hand on the side of Chris' face and turned her head to look into her eyes. Chris was captivated by the depths of her ceruleans. She wanted to stop fighting herself, her feelings, but fear was paralyzing. Then the corners of Amanda's lips turned upwards into a small smile and Chris felt a shiver go through her. She leaned in and kissed Amanda firmly on the lips, running her tongue lightly along her bottom lip. Amanda's lips parted and Chris slipped her tongue past them, caressing the inside of her mouth. She brought her hand to the back of Amanda's head and pulled her further into their kiss. He watched, once again, from the other side of the room, disgusted by what he was seeing. They were making out like a couple of teenagers and in front of children no less. He decided it was time for him to make his next move. This was the most important task, acquiring video surveillance. This would tell him everything he needed to know about them; their habits, their needs, who was dominant and who was submissive. This is where he'd learn how to break them. They must repent or die.


	13. Chapter 13: Solutions

Chapter 13: Solutions

They got home from the bowling alley at eleven and went right to the bedroom to get ready for bed. While she was changing, Chris thought about the conversation she had with Fin. She couldn't decide what to do about the feelings she was having for Amanda. One part of her wanted to go for it like Fin suggested. The other part of her was fighting like hell against feeling anything real. It wasn't that Amanda was the first straight woman she'd ever been with but she was the first that she'd ever had any real feelings for. Straight women were never in it for the long haul. They were always just vacationing, checking out the scenery. They'd partake in the festivities and then go back to their boyfriends when they'd had their fill. Chris couldn't do that. She had nothing and no one to go back to. This was her life. What happened when Amanda's curiosity about being with another woman wore off and she wanted to go back to dating men again? She wouldn't allow herself to used and then put back on the shelf like some product she was trying out. She wouldn't allow herself to be hurt.

She went over and laid down next to Amanda in bed and turned her back to her. Amanda could tell that something was on Chris' mind. She'd just watched her stand by the closet for five minutes just staring into space, obviously thinking about something. She thought maybe it had something to do with the conversation she'd had with Fin at the bowling alley but she wasn't sure if she should ask. After laying there silently for fifteen minutes, not able to fall asleep, she decided she'd try to talk to her about it.

"Christina" she whispered, "are you asleep?"

"No" she whispered back.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing" she said. She was still trying to sort her feelings out and she didn't want Amanda's help doing it.

"What were you and Fin talking about earlier?"

"Nothing" she lied. Amanda reached out and put her hand on Chris' shoulder, pulling on her to force her to turn over. Chris resisted her tug and pulled the covers higher over her. Amanda put her hand back on her shoulder and pulled her again. Chris shrugged from under Amanda's touch, "Stop it" she said harshly.

"What did I do?" She didn't know where this attitude was coming from. She couldn't figure out where things had gone wrong between them.

"Nothing" she repeated for the third time. She really just wanted Amanda to leave her alone and go to sleep.

"Well, why are you mad at me?" she asked, not giving up on finding out what was wrong.

"I'm not" she said, annoyance evident in her voice.

"Well, why are you mad?" Amanda asked amending her question.

"I'm not mad" she answered angrily. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath trying to control her temper, "I'm not mad" she said in a calmer tone. Amanda didn't know what else to say or ask to get her to talk about what was going on with her. She just laid there and stared at Christina's back. Chris finally turned over and looked at Amanda. She immediately felt bad when she saw the sadness in her eyes. "I'm really not mad, ok. I promise".

"Something's bothering you. What is it?" she asked. She didn't know if what she had to say would hurt Amanda's feelings. She wasn't even sure what she wanted to say. Her thoughts were all jumbled and Amanda wasn't giving her a chance to work through them. She just decided to say what was on her mind and hope that by the end, everything made sense to both her and Amanda.

"You're really into this whole thing" she said softly, "This relationship".

"I thought that's what you wanted" she said confused. "I put my feelings aside. I've gotten more comfortable with the idea of being with you".

"You've gotten too comfortable, Amanda" she said. "The cameras aren't even up yet and you're kissing me and cuddling with me. When I said to put your feelings aside, I was talking about how you were acting in public; not private". Amanda thought she was doing a good job of masking her actions as just being part of the job. Truthfully, she really wanted to figure out what it'd be like to date Christina. It'd been nice so far. She was completely comfortable with her feelings for Chris and was considering talking to her about trying to make it work once this case was over.

"I…I just…" She wasn't sure to explain herself.

"I get it, that you like me. I like you too" she admitted. Amanda was surprised to hear Christina say that she liked her back. She was sure that she was just playing along for the sake of the case. "I just….I don't think it's a good idea for us to get too comfortable in this arrangement" she said.

"Why not?" Amanda asked disappointed. "We like each other and I think we work really well together. Why shouldn't we see where this could go?"

"Because you're straight, Amanda" she said bluntly. "I'm not interested in being you're science experiment; someone for your to test out your fantasies on".

"That's not what I'm doing" Amanda said defensively. "Let me remind you, that I was forced to do this same as you".

"Uh, if I remember correctly it was you who talked me into doing this" Chris corrected her. "Just admit it, Amanda. Whatever you're reservations were, you wanted to know what it would be like to be with a woman; to be with me". Amanda's silence was all the confirmation she needed. "I'm not a shoe. You can't try me on to see if I'm a fit".

"That's not what I want" Amanda said honestly. "I really….want to be with you" she said hesitantly. "It's not an experiment". She put her hand under Chris' chin and lifted her head until their eyes met. "It's not an experiment" she said in her low sultry southern accent. Christina's stomach was doing back flips and her heart felt like a hammer pounding in her chest. It was so loud it was drowning out the thoughts in her head that were telling her that this was a mistake. She put her hand on the back of Amanda's head and pulled her into a smoldering kiss. She abandoned all common sense. Every fiber of her mind was screaming "Don't do it" while every bone in her body ached for their connection. Amanda's mind was going a million miles a minute. Christina felt so amazing; more amazing than any man she'd ever been with. Her lips were so soft and her touch was firm but gentle. Christina rolled on top of Amanda, continuing to explore the inside of her mouth with her tongue. She moved her legs so they rested on either side of her hips. She was getting more and more nervous as things became more and more heated. Chris' hand slid under her shirt and lightly caressed her skin, sending a shiver through her. Her tongue skimmed across the roof of her mouth and her lips pressed gently against her own. Her hand moved up and cup her breast and she ran her tongue along her lips before pulling away and looking deep into her eyes. She looked for something, anything that would tell her that this was a mistake. Anything that would say "Don't be fooled. She's using you. Fight it". She searched and she couldn't find it.

Amanda searched Christina's eyes for some indication of what she was thinking. She wondered if she could see her nerves. She was more afraid now than ever. More afraid than being cornered by her deputy chief. More afraid than when she was doubled over in pain on the ground at a gas station. More afraid than in the captain's office in jeopardy of losing her badge, than when she was in jail, than when she was laying on the ground in a pool of her own blood with a hole in her shoulder. More afraid now than ever. Love was a scary thing. "_Love_" she thought to herself. "_Is this love_?" Christina could see every ounce of fear in her. She rolled over to lay down at her side and continued to stare into her deep blue portals.

"I should be the one who's afraid" Christina said in a whisper. She got up and walked out of the bedroom, leaving Amanda laying there alone. She sat on the couch with her back against the armrest and stared out the living room window. Frannie jumped up on the couch with her and laid her head in her lap. Chris pet her head and played with her ears and Frannie snuggled into her, offering herself as a friend. Amanda walked silently into the living room and sat on the other end of the couch. She watched quietly as Chris played with Frannie.

"I know that I didn't seem open to being with you or any woman for that matter" she said breaking the silence, "but it wasn't about being gay or not being gay. I'm fine with gay people. Fin's son is gay and we help gay victims all the time. I like gay people". Chris smiled at the way Amanda was rambling similar to the way she did when she drank too much coffee. "It was about me, about knowing something about myself and being secure. Then all of sudden, there's this new piece that I didn't see coming. Has that ever happened to you?" she asked. Chris shook her head no but didn't look up at Amanda. "Well, you did that to me. Nobody's ever done that to me before; made me question who I am. But I'm secure again. I…I want this to work out. I want _us_ to work out….even when this is over". Chris stared at Frannie and continued to rub her ears as she laid in her lap. "And I'm afraid, same as you are, that it…that it might not but I still want to try".

"I don't think we're afraid of the same thing" Chris said quietly. "I'm afraid of…." Chris paused for a moment to think about whether she wanted to admit what her fear was about. "I'm not afraid of who I am. I've known that for a long time and no one's ever made me question myself, so I don't know….what you're feeling. I'm not worried that it won't work out, I'm…just afraid" she said deciding to avoid saying what her real fear was. "But I….I want to try too" she admitted. "So we'll just keep going the same way we've been for the last few days and uh, we'll see what happens, I guess". She finally looked up and met Amanda's eyes and saw that the fear that was there before was faint. She looked more ready for this than she'd ever been for anything. More ready now than ever.

"Come back to bed?" Amanda asked standing up from the couch. Chris thought about it for a moment before standing up and walking back into the bedroom. Having just lost her pillow, Frannie laid her head down on the couch. Amanda turned to follow Chris back to bed when she heard Frannie whine from behind her. She turned back around to see that Frannie had lifted her head from the couch and was staring at her with her sweet brown puppy dog eyes.

"Ok, you can come too" she said. Frannie hopped down off the couch and went into the bedroom, Amanda following close behind her. She got in bed and laid next to Christina while Frannie jumped up and settled down at the foot of the bed. Amanda laid there thinking about how normal a couple they were, both laying there with their dog at the foot of the bed. She smiled to herself then rolled over and cuddled into Christina in the same manner she had for the past few nights, drifting off to sleep. She could really get used to this.

Amanda woke up the next morning to the phone ringing out in the living room. She heard Chris answer in a sweet, professional tone and wondered who she was talking to. She pulled back the covers and got out bed, lazily making her way out of the bedroom. The sweet smell of baked goods hit her immediately after she opened the bedroom door. Chris was in the kitchen at the breakfast bar with the phone between her shoulder and ear as she stirred something in a mixing bowl. Amanda looked over and saw Frannie at her food dishes enjoying a fresh breakfast and concluded that Chris had taken care of changing her food and water this morning. She walked over and saw two freshly baked cakes and three trays of cookies on the table. Chris ended her phone call and poured the batter she'd been stirring into a clean cake pan.

"Someone's been busy this morning" Amanda said looking at everything on the table and counters.

"Yeah, well, this business isn't going run itself" she said putting the cake in the oven. Amanda looked at the clock and saw it was only eight fifteen. They hadn't done any shopping for bakery stuff together so she assumed Christina went out early and got everything they needed. She walked over and stood next to the counter, taking in the mess that was being made in their kitchen.

"What time did you get up this morning?" she asked. She reached over and stuck her finger in bowl of icing.

"Early" Chris answered. She saw Amanda pick up some icing with her finger and slapped her hand away. "That is for the cakes" she said, "for our customers" she added.

"We have customers already?" Amanda asked in surprise. Chris nodded.

"Apparently, TARU made us a website and Olivia, Nick and Fin passed out some of our business cards yesterday. We've gotten ten orders just this morning and I haven't even checked our online orders yet" she said moving around the kitchen like a skilled chef.

"Alright. I'm on it" Amanda said. She snuck another dip of icing and went over to the makeshift business center TARU had set up for them, taking the phone with her. She sat down and started up the computer, taking another look at their business cards as she waited for it to boot up. She couldn't believe how real they looked. Once the computer was up, she pulled up their website and went to their online orders page. "Oh my god" she said in disbelief. Chris looked over at her mortified by what she might say. "There's twenty more orders on here" she said. Chris groaned, resting her arms on the counter and letting her head fall on top of them.

"We need to hire help" she said in a muffled voice. She let out a frustrated sigh before getting back to work on their orders.

"I thought this was supposed to be a fake business" Amanda said, "Why are they giving out so many cards?"

"It has to be a believable business I guess" Chris answered as she covered the cakes with icing. The phone started to ring and Amanda picked up the cordless and answered but only heard a dial tone. She could still hear ringing as she hung up the home phone and realized it her cell ringing in the bedroom. She got up and went to answer it. It was Fin and he wanted to know if she had time to meet him for brunch. He said it wasn't about the case. He just wanted to check in with her. She said she could meet up with him but asked if they could push it back to lunch. Thanks to him, Olivia and Nick they had a ton of orders to work on. He laughed and agreed to push their meet back to lunchtime before hanging up with her. She went back to the living room and sat at the computer to work on their orders.

"Who was that?" Chris asked from the kitchen. She took a batch of cupcakes from their phone orders out of the oven and sat it on the top of the stove.

"Fin" Amanda answered as she wrote out the online orders for Christina. "He wants to meet me for lunch".

"Oh, great. You get to go out for lunch dates and I get to bake all day".

"I can call him back and tell him I have to…stay home and help you bake" she offered.

"Ummm, no thanks. We want people to like our desserts and we both know that you can't cook" she said.

"How do you know that I can't cook?" she asked with an offended look.

"Because before I moved in with you, you didn't have anything that resembled real food in your refrigerator" she said walking over to sit on the couch. She sat with her arm draped over the back of the couch and positioned herself to face Amanda at the computer desk.

"That's not true" she argued, "I had real food".

"No, you didn't. There was nothing in there that wasn't pre-packaged or in take out containers" she said. "It's okay that you can't cook. I wouldn't be able to if it weren't for my mother teaching me to be a good house wife while I was growing up". Amanda laughed and handed her the list of orders that had come in online.

"Well, maybe I should stay and learn a few things from you".

"No, it's ok" she said, "You should go" she said looking over the list, "I have plenty to keep me busy". Amanda thought for a minute, debating whether she should stay in and help Chris despite her telling her it was ok for her to leave. "I'm gonna need to go back to the store" Chris said still looking at the list Amanda had given her.

"Ok" Amanda said turning back to the computer, "I'll process these orders and send out the confirmations and update the books. It shouldn't take me too long. Then we can get ready and leave together". Chris got up from the couch and headed back to the kitchen.

"Ok" she said, "sounds good". She took the last of the icing and covered the cupcakes before starting on the decorations. They both worked diligently on their separate tasks. Chris stared at Amanda as she sat at the computer. She thought about the talk they'd had the night before about how they both wanted to try at real relationship with each other. She didn't know what she thinking agreeing to that. She didn't know anything about being in a relationship. But there was something about Amanda that made her want to learn. She could feel herself changing little by little and she wondered just how different she'd be by the end of this case and if she'd like herself more or less when it was over. She didn't take people's advice very often but she could still hear Fin's voice in her head telling her not to let a good thing get past her. She didn't know why but it was a piece of advice that she wanted to take. She just hoped that her fears didn't become a reality.


	14. Chapter 14: Piece de resistance

Chapter 14: Pièce de Résistance

Once Chris got all the cakes she'd made so far decorated and Amanda had finished their online orders, Chris waited for Amanda to get dressed so they could leave the apartment. Chris laid back on the bed staring up at the ceiling. Her mind couldn't stay on one thought process for more than five seconds before moving on to another. She felt like she had ADD.

"What are you doing?" Amanda asked, standing at the end of the bed looking at her. Chris was so in a trance that she hadn't noticed that Amanda had come out of the bathroom and was standing there staring at her.

"Ummm….I'm trying to think but it's really hard right now" she said sitting up. "I just….can't seem to focus". She took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. "Ok, you ready to go?" she asked, hitting herself on the thighs and then getting up from the bed.

"Uhh, yeah" Amanda answered, amused by Chris' weird mood. She grabbed her wallet, phone and keys and followed Chris out of the apartment. He watched them leave and immediately made his way into the building and up to their apartment. When he got inside he looked around and found the pictures of them on the table behind the couch. He smiled, knowing he was in the right place. He put his bag down and opened it up, revealing enough small cameras and wiring to give him a view of every room. He scanned the apartment trying to figure out placements that would give him the best angles. He knew he needed to move quickly because he didn't know when they would be back. He placed the cameras, hiding them strategically behind decorations already in place in the apartment. He made sure to clean up any plaster that had fallen loose from the holes he put in the walls and then quickly checked the set up on his computer. He smiled with content at the view of the apartment. His real work was about to begin. He logged off and shut down his computer, packed everything up and slipped out of the apartment, returning to his command center to work. He didn't know that in just the couple of minutes he'd been logged on, he'd alerted them that he was watching.

Amanda and Chris took Chris' car so she wouldn't have to walk with all the groceries she picked up from the store. She dropped Amanda off with Fin and they kissed goodbye like a normal couple. This was all still a little foreign to Christina but she felt like she was doing a good job so far at being a fake wife and real girlfriend to Amanda. She took off to the store and left Amanda and Fin to themselves.

They'd both ordered and were now eating their food, making small talk. Amanda told Fin how she didn't appreciate them giving out so many business cards and making a website without telling them beforehand. Fin laughed and gave an insincere apology about the prank.

"What?" he asked still laughing. "It was your idea to run a bakery. You had to know you'd actually have to make a few cakes and bake a few cookies".

"First of all, the bakery was Chris' idea" she said correcting him, "and second, it's not just a few cakes and cookies. We got thirty five orders in by nine o'clock this morning" she said. Clearly not pleased. Fin just kept laughing. "Yeah, laugh it up. You're our delivery guy". He stopped laughing abruptly and stared at her, trying to figure out if she was serious.

"I hope you're joking" he said. She shook her head.

"Uh un" she murmured. "We talked about it this morning. Christina wants to hire help so….you're hired" she said with a smug grin. "What? No more laughin'?"

"Yeah, alright, you got me" he said in defeat. "So Chris really knows what she's doing with the desserts huh?"

"Oh yeah" Amanda said nodding her head, "You should have seen her this morning. She looked like Susie homemaker". He laughed at the image. "She didn't want my help though. Said I'd probably mess somethin' up".

"You would" Fin said simply. "You know you can't cook".

"I am not that bad" she said offended by Chris' and now Fin's opinion of her kitchen skills.

"Yeah right" he said, dipping his fries in ketchup before eating them. "So, things are good then, between you and Chris?" he asked.

"Yeah. Why wouldn't they be?" He shrugged his shoulders.

"No reason" he said waving the waitress over. "Can I get another order of fries?" he asked nicely. She nodded her head and went to put his new order in.

"Did you say something to her?" she asked. Fin got a deer in headlights look but quickly tried to hide it.

"Naw, I didn't say anything" he said before finishing his soda.

"Really" Amanda said unconvinced. "What'd you talk about last night at the bowling alley?"

"You know, just, how things are going with you two. Just checkin' in" he said nonchalantly.

"Like you're just checkin' in with me right now?" she asked. He nodded. "I don't believe you. What'd you talk about?" she asked again.

"I could tell that she was a little uncomfortable at lunch yesterday and I just asked her about it that's all" he said honestly.

"And what'd she say?"

"You need to talk to her about that" he said.

"I did. She said you weren't talking about anything". Amanda could tell that Fin knew something that might fill in some blanks about why Chris was in such a bad mood the night before. "Last night, we agreed to stay together after….you know" she said leaving him to fill in the blank. She didn't know if anyone around them was listening to their conversation. Fin smiled knowing that Chris had taken his advice.

"Nice" he said. The waitress came over and sat his fries on the table and asked if they needed anything else. They both said they were ok and she left them to enjoy the rest of their lunch. "I kinda like the difference in you when she's around".

"What difference?" she asked curiously.

'You're, you know….softer".

"Softer?"

"Yeah. You're not such a hard ass" he said. Amanda laughed. "Don't get me wrong, you're still got it when we're workin' but you soften up when you're with her". Amanda couldn't argue with him. Christina definitely brought out the softer side of her.

"Well, I figure we can't both be behind brick walls all the time. Chris is…..so protective of everything. Herself mostly" she explained. "I just thought if I opened up a little that it'd be easier for her to open up with me too".

"I guess it's workin'" he said finishing up his fries. His phone started to ring in his pocket and he dug it out and answered. "You sure?" he asked into the speaker. "Ok, I'm with Amanda now. I'll let her know". He hung up the phone and looked over at Amanda. "That was TARU" he said in a lowered voice. "They're up". He didn't need to explain anymore. Amanda knew exactly what he was talking about. "They couldn't trace it. He wasn't on long enough" he said still whispering. "But they've got a view of every room".

"Uhh, I need to call Chris" she said pulling out her phone and dialing her number. She listened to the rings, waiting for Chris to answer. "Come on, hon pick up" she whispered as she impatiently waited.

Chris walked in the door with the last of her groceries and felt her phone vibrating in her pocket. She kicked the door closed and walked into the kitchen, setting the bags on the floor before reaching into her pocket and pulling out her phone. She saw Amanda's name on the caller id and thought she might want her to come pick her up from lunch with Fin.

"Hey" she said finally answering. She picked up a few grocery bags and set them on the counter and started unpacking the food.

"Hey, are you home?" Amanda asked. Chris smiled at her thick southern twang and thought that she'd never get tired of hearing it.

"Yeah" she said putting away the groceries she didn't need for baking.

"Uh, well the….you know what's have been installed" she said quietly into the receiver. Chris stopped for a second to think about what Amanda was trying to tell her.

"The "you know what"?" she said thinking aloud. Then it dawned on her. "Oh, the y…yeah. Ok. I understand". She took a deep breath and mentally prepared herself for how she and Amanda were gonna have to speed up their relationship.

"Ok, so I'll be home soon" she said. Chris nodded as if Amanda could see her. "I love you". Chris' heart skipped a beat hearing those three sacred words. She didn't know if it was Amanda her fake wife saying it or Amanda her new girlfriend. Either way, it freaked her out. She decided to go with the fake wife and not think too much more about it.

"I…I love you too" she said a bit hesitant to let the words roll off her tongue. "I'll see you in a little bit". They said their goodbyes and hung up the phone. Chris kept her composure and went on about her task of putting away the groceries like she didn't know she was being watched. Amanda and Fin settled the bill for their lunch and left. Fin dropped Amanda at the apartment and went on about his day. Amanda went upstairs to the apartment and went inside to Christina still in the kitchen. She was on the phone arguing with her father.

'Well, what do you want me to do, papa. I'm not there" she said. She turned around and saw Amanda. She smiled and held up a finger, asking her to wait one minute. Amanda nodded and looked at all the orders on the table and counter that Chris had done so far. They were all decorated and packaged, some in white cake boxes and others on nice silver platters covered with colored cellophane paper. Amanda was really impressed with what she'd gotten done so far. "You're too soft with her. You act like she's gonna break" Chris said putting another batch of cookies in the oven. "Necesitas para poner tu pie abajo". She looked at Amanda who looked back at her with an amused expression on her face. "Papa, listen to me. She's working you, ok. She cries and says she's sorry and you fall for it every time. You need to step up. Dile que este conduta es inaceptable y que no vas a aguantar con el". She leaned up against the counter and ran her hand through her hair, obviously wanting to be done with the conversation. "Well, if she keeps acting out then have her arrested for truancy. A night in lock up might do her some good". Amanda shook her head at Chris' suggestion. "Well, you did it to me and I turned out just fine" she said receiving raised eye brows from Amanda. She gave her a look that said "don't ask" and continued talking with her father. "Ok, papa, I have to go. I have to get back to work. I will stop by tomorrow if I have time and try to talk to her, ok? Ok. Yeah, love you too. Bye." She hung up the phone and put it down on the counter. "Hi" she said nicely. She walked over and pulled Amanda into her, kissing her sweetly on the lips. Both of them were thinking about the cameras that were up and tried to make their greeting seem as normal as possible.

"Hi" Amanda said back once they'd parted ways. "So you're sister's causing trouble again?" she asked, having gotten the gist of the conversation she just had with her father. Chris groaned.

"Yes. She skipped school….again. My parents don't like to punish her. They think she'll hate them for it later. So they like for me to do it because, you know, younger sisters are supposed to hate their older sisters. They just baby her so much it drives me nuts". She picked up a bowl of icing and started to spread it over one of the cakes.

"You never told me you went to jail as a kid" Amanda said picking up another bowl of icing. Chris saw her and her eyes got big. "What? The cake is already done. I can't mess it up" she said. "Now which cake is this for?" Chris pointed to the chocolate cake on the end. "So about this juvenile arrest. Out with it?" she said as she started to cover the cake with icing.

"It was a mistake" Chris said receiving an unconvinced look from Amanda. "It was. I mean, yeah I used to get into trouble but that time, it wasn't me. My parents of course didn't know that. They thought I was up to no good again so they let me sit in a cell all day and half the night. Finally, the cops caught the kids who actually did do it and they let me go. That's when I met my mentor, Angela. You remember, I told you about her?". Amanda nodded her head remembering an earlier conversation she'd had with Chris about how she became interested in being a cop. "She helped me get on the straight and narrow and now….here I am".

"So I married an ex-con?" Amanda asked jokingly.

"More like a wrongly accused teenage delinquent" she said starting the decorations on her cake. Amanda reached for one of the decorating bags and Chris slapped her hand. "Oh no you don't. Here, you can ice these cakes over here" she said handing her the biggest bowl of icing she'd made for the largest order they'd gotten that day. "No decorating for you". Amanda took the bowl from her and began icing the cakes while Chris did the decorations. She thought about how good they were doing so far and wondered if it was as effortless for Chris as it was for her. She hadn't thought about the cameras at all during their conversation. She hoped it was the same for Christina.

He sat in his room watching them in the kitchen baking like a couple of housewives. He hadn't pegged them as the baking types. "_Too butch_" he thought to himself. He listened to them talk about her problems with her sister and trouble as a teenager. "That sounds more like it" he said. "A rebel". He'd yet to find out what their names were and was waiting rather impatiently for an opportunity to arise where they had to use them. He turned and looked at the wall behind his computer setup at the shrine he'd built. Dozens upon dozens of pictures of his previous victims were taped to the wall. The final pictures he'd taken of them were adorned with a red x, denoting a job completed. He got up and walked over to a small stand with a jewelry box on top. He opened it up and scanned the collection of rings, remembering every detail of his crimes as his eyes moved from one to the next. "And the best is yet to come" he said in his a sinister tone.

"Amanda" he heard from one of the monitors. He quickly closed the box and went back over, taking a seat in front of his many screens.

"Yeah". He saw they blonde walk out of the bedroom back into the kitchen.

"Amanda" he whispered, caressing her face on the screen.

"Fin's here to take these and deliver them" Chris said packing up the orders they'd finished together. "You have the addresses?" she asked. Amanda nodded and went over to the computer. She printed out a list orders, their numbers, and corresponding addresses. While she was at the computer she sent out texts and emails telling customers their orders were in route. She grabbed the list from the printer and took it over to Fin and then they helped him to the car with all the bags. While they were outside he told them that TARU was able to intercept his video feed, visual and audio but they couldn't track his location. Apparently this guy knew what he was doing and was switching servers too quickly for them to pin point a place. It'd be up to them to keep his interest and draw him out. Once everything was situated in his car, they thanked him for the help and the update, then returned to the apartment. Chris went over to the couch and laid down while Amanda went back to the computer, having seen a couple more orders had come in.

"Hey, I was thinking" she said still looking at the computer screen, "we should register as a new business. Do all those annoying papers for taxes and what not and then find a place that delivers baking goods in bulk. That way it's cheaper and you don't have to keep going to the store". Chris didn't say anything. "Honey, did you hear me?" she asked. She still got no response. She turned around to see her laying on the couch with her eyes closed, seemingly asleep. "Chris….Christina" she said a little louder.

"Um hum" Chris mumbled. "Register, get stuff in bulk. I heard you" she said keeping her eyes closed. Amanda looked at her laying there and couldn't help the smile that grew on her face. She didn't know if she should but she felt really lucky. Chris seemed like the most unobtainable person and yet she was willing to try to change her single mentality to be with her. She got up and went over to the couch, laying down between Chris legs with her head on her on her chest. Chris brought her hand up to play with Amanda's hair. "Uhmmm" she moaned, "you smell good".

"That's because I showered" Amanda whispered receiving a small laugh from her girlfriend.

"Oh, is that how that works?" Chris asked jokingly. Amanda nodded.

"Yeah, that's how it works" she said, "You want to try it?" Chris shook her head.

"Uh un. Too tired" she said still running her fingers through Amanda's soft, blonde locks. After a few minutes, Amanda felt her hand stop moving through her hair. She looked up and saw that Chris was fast asleep. She pulled the blanket that was folded over the back of the couch down to cover them and joined her to take a nap. He watched on the screen, enchanted by them. They weren't like the other couples. They had been settled, structured, locked into a routine. It was obvious that they'd been together for many years. But these two, they felt new, fresh; like their romance had just begun. He took a screen shot of them laying there together and printed it off. The first of many photos of them he planned to put on the wall. "Amanda and Christina" he said as he wrote their names above the newest picture in his collage. "My pièce de résistance".

**Spanish to English Translations**

**Necesitas para poner tu pie abajo**- You need to put your foot down.

**Dile que este conduta es inaceptable y que no vas a aguantar con el**- Tell her that her behavior is unacceptable and that you're not going to put up with it.


	15. Chapter 15: A Night of Firsts

Chapter 15: A Night of Firsts

Christina woke a few hours later, with Amanda still laying on her chest. She looked out of the living room window and saw that it had rained while they were sleeping. It was a wet, gloomy, stay in and order take out kind of day. She usually liked those days but not so much now. She wanted to get out of the apartment and out from under the watchful eye of the psychopath that had recently taken a special kind of interest in them. She looked at her watch and saw it was nearing six o'clock in the evening. Just as she was about to wake Amanda, Frannie came over and started to lick her face.

"Oh, Frannie" she groaned, pushing her nose away and wiping off her slobber. Frannie stepped back and sat down, wagging her tail from side to side. Amanda closed her eyes and tried to go back to sleep, only to receive a loud bark and more licking from her dog. "Alright, alright. I'm up" she said sitting up and rubbing her eyes. "You happy now?" Frannie barked again as if to give her approval. Chris chuckled at the two of them. Amanda looked over and saw that she was awake. "What are you laughing at?" she asked.

"Oh nothing" she said with a sly smile. Frannie came over and jumped on the couch, right on top of Christina. "Ow, Frannie!" she yelled as one of paws jabbed her in the ribs. Frannie curled up and laid down as if Christina were her bed. "I hope you're comfortable" Chris said sarcastically, looking at the dog. Frannie whined and nuzzled her head into Chris' chest. "Good. I'm glad". Amanda laughed and got up from couch. She filled Frannie's food bowl and changed her water before heading for the bathroom. She paused at the door, wondering if he had cameras with a view of the toilet. Her phone vibrated in her pocket and she took it out, seeing a text from TARU. It read:

_You're good. Can only see the shower_

She smiled to herself and nodded her head. She went in and shut the door behind her, happy that she could use the bathroom in private. She came back out to the living room and showed Christina, who was still laying lazily on the couch, the text from TARU.

"Well that's nice to know" she said. She was glad that this guy had some sense of boundaries, even if they were insignificant in comparison to the boundaries he didn't mind crossing, like raping and murdering people. Amanda sat down on the couch and pet Frannie's head. She was still laying on top of Chris and didn't look like she'd be moving anytime soon. "You want go out and get dinner?" Chris asked. Amanda shrugged her shoulders.

"Yeah, sure" she said. "Where to?"

"Ummm, why don't we decide on the way" she said hoping Amanda got the hint. She nodded her head.

"Yeah, that sounds good". She got up from the couch and got Frannie to let Chris up so they could go get changed. They decided to take Frannie with them so she could get some fresh air. They went for a walk and stopped at a hot dog stand that Christina liked. They had the most amazing veggie brats she'd ever had. They took Frannie for a walk through the park and then stopped for ice cream on their way home. Chris thought about how nice it was to actually date for a change. Maybe being an emotionally unavailable, excessively independent person wasn't as good as she'd always thought. Maybe Amanda would be the one to bring out a different side of her. They made their way back home and changed into pajamas to lounge the couch with popcorn and watch a movie. Amanda sat upright on the couch and Chris sat with her back against the armrest and her feet underneath Amanda's butt.

"If you're feet are cold why don't you go put on some socks?" Amanda asked.

"Uh un" Chris mumbled as she stuffed some popcorn in her mouth. "They're nice and comfy right where they are" she said engrossed in the film.

"Well, they're fr…" Amanda was about to argue with her but Chris quickly shushed her.

"This is a good part" she said quietly. Amanda looked at her sideways.

"Did you just shush me?" she asked. Chris tried hard to hold in her laugh at the expression on Amanda's face but finally let it go. Amanda took some of the popcorn from the bowl and threw it at her. Frannie got up from laying at the foot of the couch and started to eat the popcorn that'd fallen on the floor. "No! Frannie Mae" Amanda said in a stern tone. She stopped eating the popcorn and looked up at her. "Absolutely not". Frannie whined and went back over to lay down. Amanda got up to get the broom and clean up the rest of the popcorn and Chris took the bowl to the kitchen. She was still so tired from baking all day. She could still smell all the icing and different cookie and cake aromas in her hair. All she wanted to do now was shower and go to bed. Then she remembered the cameras. _"Great"_ she thought to herself. _"A pervert watching me in the shower is just the way I want to end my day"._ She sighed and dragged herself into the bedroom, deciding to just wait until morning shower and planned to be very quick about it.

Amanda turned off the tv in the living room, then went into the bedroom and got into bed with Christina. She leaned over and kissed her goodnight then turned out the lamp on her side of the bed. She closed her eyes, took a deep, relaxing breath and tried to go to sleep. On the other side of the bed, she could feel Christina tossing and turning. She did her best to ignore her and just go to sleep but after a couple minutes, she couldn't stand it anymore.

"What is wrong with you?" she asked looking over her shoulder at her girlfriend.

"I feel so dirty" Chris said. "I hate going to bed unshowered" she said making up her own word.

"Well, then go shower" Amanda said giving the obvious solution to her problems.

"I don't want to" she with a yawn. "I just wanna go to sleep". Amanda chuckled at her dilemma. She needed to shower so she could sleep comfortably but she didn't want to shower because she wanted to go to sleep. She turned over and was about to say something else but just that quickly, Christina was fast asleep. She scoot in closer, laid her head on her shoulder, and closed her eyes to join her.

He watched them as they slept, straining his eyes to see through the darkness. A stream of light came through the curtains on the bedroom window, landing on Amanda's ring, making it shimmer. He fixated on it, thinking about the moment when that ring would be in his hands and how perfect it would look at the center of his collection. He became more and more enraged as he stared at the ring on her finger, denoting her marriage, her commitment, to another. She didn't deserve that ring. That ring made a statement to everyone who saw it that she'd stood up, in front of everyone, and made a commitment to god to uphold the sacred bonds of marital union. But she'd done so with a woman. "An abomination in the face of the Lord!" he yelled into the silence of his room, slamming his fists down on the desk. "You must repent" he said trying to calm his anger. "Repent or die".

The next morning, it was Amanda's turn to wake up early and take Frannie out for a walk. When she came back, she got her fresh food and water and tried to think of the easiest thing she could make for breakfast. She decided on trying out the waffle maker that Christina had gone back home and stolen when her family was out. She plugged it in to heat up while she mixed up the batter. She added some blueberries and poured a little bit of olive oil on the griddle, remembering that Chris almost had a fit the last time she handed her butter to cook with. Once the griddle was heated, she poured the batter over it and let down the top for the waffles to cook. She put on some coffee and took out a couple of eggs, cracking them into a bowl. She put a skillet on the stove and turned on the fire for it to heat up. She checked the waffles before heading into the bedroom to wake Christina.

She sat down on her side of the bed and moved her hair from her face. She leaned down and gently kissed her on the lips; once, twice, three times, until she started to wake up. Chris slowly opened her eyes to find blue ones staring down at her. She smiled and brought her hand up to the back of her head, pulling her down into another kiss. Chris moved her hand down to her shoulder and softly pushed her away.

"Mhmmm…Sorry, I have morning breath" she said getting a good stretch. Amanda laughed.

"I'm making breakfast" she said. Christina got a horrified look on her face. "Don't worry, it's pretty fool proof" she assured her. "So get up, shower, brush your teeth and then come eat". She gave her one more quick kiss before getting up and going back into the kitchen. She was glad that she'd put the waffle maker and the stove on the lowest setting, otherwise the waffles and her skillet would've burned. She scrambled the eggs and then plated their food and made their cups of coffee. Chris came out of the bedroom, showered and feeling fresh. She had on an oversized sweater, underwear, and socks. Her towel dried hair fell around her face in bouncy curls. She sat down to the table with Amanda and they ate breakfast and talked. Frannie came over and sat at Chris' feet, looking up at her in anticipation. Chris broke off a piece of her waffle and gave it to her.

"Hey" Amanda said, "no people food for the dog" she said in a chastising tone. Christina shrugged her shoulders and looked down at Frannie.

"Sorry, kid. Mama says you have to eat your own food". Frannie whined and went over to her water bowl for a drink, then went and laid in her bed. Chris turned back to Amanda, "We should go on a date tonight" she said. She realized that they hadn't done that since they'd been together. They'd been out with Olivia, Nick, and Fin. Then they'd had the bowling night with everyone. They'd been out with Frannie too. But they'd never been on a real date together, just the two of them.

"A date?"

"Yeah, you know, get dressed up, make a reservation, I'll open doors for you" she joked. "A date". Amanda nodded her head.

"Ok" she said with a little laugh, "a date it is". They finished breakfast and cleaned up the kitchen then got to work on bakery orders. While the last cake was in the oven, Chris went over to the computer to pick a restaurant for their first date. After about ten minutes of searching, she settled on a Mexican place that she'd been wanting to try for a while. This place let patrons decide between traditional table seating, a table with no chairs for you to kneel while you ate, or a picnic style setting on nice blankets with pillows for comfort. She made their reservation for seven thirty and then went back to the kitchen to finish their orders. At five o'clock, Nick came over unannounced to check in on them. He told them that he, Olivia and Fin were going out to dinner and asked if they wanted to join. They told him they already dinner plans but thanked him for the invite. They walked out with him, taking Frannie with them so she could have her evening constitutional. When they got back to the apartment, they went to the bedroom and started to get ready.

"Where are we going?" Amanda asked. She decided on wearing black slacks and a nice purple shirt and heels. She left her hair down in its naturally curly state and applied a light layer of makeup.

"None of your business" Chris said as she put her shirt over her head. She was wearing a long sleeved white shirt with a black and white pin striped vest, white jeans and black boots. She'd straightened her hair and pulled some of it back and up into a ponytail. She didn't feel like doing anything else, so she opted not to put on any makeup. "Ok, you ready?" she asked turning to look at her girlfriend.

"Are you gonna tell me where we're goin'? Chris pretended to think about it for a moment before answering.

"No" she said shaking her head from side to side. She gave her fake smile as she pocketed her phone and wallet, grabbed her keys and walked out of the bedroom. Amanda stood there thinking about where they could be going when she heard Christina yell from the front room, "Amanda, come on. We're gonna be late". She grabbed her keys and phone and walked out of the bedroom. She made sure that Frannie had enough food and water and then they left for the restaurant. When they pulled up outside the place, Amanda recognized the name. It was a place that Christina said she'd been wanting to try out. They got out of the car and went up to the entrance where Chris opened the door for Amanda, as promised. Inside, Christina gave her name and they were escorted back to their area. Christina picked the picnic style setting for them. There were candles and a bottle of champagne set in the middle of champagne glasses and two cloth place mats with menus on top. They sat down and were told that their waiter would be right with them. Christina opened the champagne and poured them both a glass. Amanda was surprised that Christina had picked such a romantic set up. Their waiter came in and asked if they liked the champagne.

"We can you bring a different selection if you'd like?" he said nicely. Chris looked to Amanda as if to tell her it was her decision. She shook her head.

"No, this one is great. Thank you" she said. The waiter nodded and asked if they'd decided what they'd like for dinner. They shook their heads and said they hadn't really looked at the menu yet.

"How about I get your chips and salsa and give you more time to look it over" he suggested. They both nodded and he left them alone to decide on their meal. After scanning the menu, Christina settled on the veggie fajitas with extra Mexican rice on the side along with potato enchiladas with salsa con queso on top.

"What's a fajita quesadilla?" Amanda asked thinking that sounded like what she wanted.

"It's…just like the name says. It's ummm, it's all the ingredients of a fajita put into a quesadilla" she explained. "Mine will come with all the ingredients on a big plate with soft taco shells and I make it myself however I like. Yours will have everything that mine has, plus whatever meat you choose, but instead of it being on a plate, it's enclosed in a quesadilla". Amanda nodded her understanding, deciding that was what she wanted to order. The waiter came back with chips and salsa and took their orders before leaving them alone again.

"This is nice" Amanda said taking a sip of champagne. "It's kind of a surprise, the whole set up".

"Yeah? Why's it a surprise?" Chris asked dipping a chip in salsa before eating it.

"This just doesn't seem like you"

"What doesn't seem like me?" she asked confused.

"You know, it's so….romantic" she said. Chris scoffed.

"I can be romantic" she said a little offended. "Why would you think that I can't be romantic?"

"You're just always so….stern" she said. "Maybe stern isn't the right word" she said quickly trying to take it back. "You're always so….so…." she couldn't think any other word to describe her that wouldn't sound offensive. "You just don't strike me as the romantic type".

"Well, I never have been. This is…the first time. I've never dated so I never had any reason to be" she said honestly. The waiter came in with their food and sat it in front of them and asked if they needed anything else. They both said they were fine so he left them alone to get started with their meals.

"Fin says he likes the difference in me, you know, when I'm around you" she said.

"Oh? And what difference would that be?" she asked curiously.

"He says I'm "softer" around you" she said. Chris laughed. "I don't think you've really gotten a chance to see me another way but I guess he's right" she admitted. "I am a little different with you". Chris smiled at the thought that she was having the same effect on Amanda that Amanda was having on her. They were both changing together and she couldn't deny that everything felt just right. They talked and enjoyed their food and champagne with no regard for the time. They didn't think about the case or the cameras in their apartment or the psycho that was after them the entire time they were at dinner. After spending three hours at the restaurant, they reluctantly decided to call it a night. Neither of them had been able to finish their dinner so they asked for to go boxes and Christina asked for another bottle of the champagne to take with them. They paid the bill, left a tip for the waiter and then started making their way home. Meanwhile, sitting in his little work shop, staring at screens of an empty apartment apart from their dog, their admirer was getting restless. He was impatiently awaiting their return home. He was getting tired of not knowing where they were going and he wasn't close enough to leave his apartment and be able to follow them. He started pacing back and forth, trying to think of something to fix this problem. Just then he heard a key in the door. He quickly took his seat and watched as they reentered the apartment.

Frannie was right there to greet them as they walked into the apartment. Chris took their food to the kitchen and put it in the frig then they went to the bedroom, followed closely by Frannie who waited while the got ready for bed. Amanda heard the sound of her drinking from the toilet and yelled at her to stop it. She went out to check her water bowl and sure enough it was empty. She filled it for her and then went back to her room to change for bed. Christina took off her boots and vest and then went out to the living room and got on the computer. She checked to see if any orders had come in, wanting to get them recorded now and save them time in the morning. When she finished she went back in the bedroom to the bathroom to brush her teeth. Amanda had changed and was sitting on the bed checking game stats on her phone. She'd promised Christina that she'd stop gambling and she hadn't placed a bet since then but she sometimes couldn't stop herself from looking at the game numbers. Chris flipped off the bathroom as she walked out and went over the dresser. She let her hair down from her ponytail then took off her jeans and shirt and tossed them into the hamper before opening her drawer to pick something to sleep in. Amanda looked up to see Chris standing there in her underwear. She debated for a moment whether she wanted to do what she thinking and decided she'd take the chance. She put her phone down and walked over, wrapping her arms around Chris' waist and kissing her softly on the shoulder.

Christina was a little caught off guard by Amanda coming up behind her, making the first move. She was sure that when the time came time she'd be the one to take the initiative. She closed the drawer and turned around so they were face to face. She looked Amanda in the eyes, silently asking if she was sure she was ready to do this. Amanda gave her answer by bringing her hand up behind Chris' head and pulling her into a kiss. She let her tongue venture out to seek entry into her mouth. Chris parted her lips and allowed her tongue to dip into her mouth, caressing her own. She reached down to Amanda's sides and pulled her t shirt up over, breaking their kiss to pull it over her head, then quickly brought their lips back together. She unlatched her bra and pulled the straps down over her shoulders, letting it fall to the floor. She spun them around so that Amanda was backed against the dresser and began to kiss down her body. Stopping at her breasts, one by one, she took them into her mouth, licking and sucking on her nipples before continuing down until she was on her knees. She placed soft, sweet kisses on her hips and thighs she hooked the sides of her underwear and pulled them down her legs. She kissed her way back up to her lips, stopping again to pay special attention to her breasts. She leaned down and lifted her carrying her over to the bed, laying her down and crawling on top of her. Amanda reached up and unhooked Christina's bra, taking it off and throwing it to the side. She reached down and pulled off her own underwear, tossing them to the side, before letting her body completely cover Amanda's. There was something special about the feeling of their bodies together, flesh on flesh. The heat emanating freely from them, unhindered by any barriers. Chris lightly traced up and down the outside of Amanda's leg with her fingers and marveled at the perfectness of her pale skin against her own golden complexion, realizing that she'd never taken this much care in a partner before. Just as this would be a first for Amanda, it was a first for her as well. Now she would know what it felt like to make love. She placed a soft but firm kiss over Amanda's heart and she could swear that she felt it beating against her lips. She looked up to meet Amanda's eyes to make sure that she was still ok with what was happening.

Amanda was full of nerves as Chris kissed and touched her all over, familiarizing herself with her body. She worried about whether or not she'd be able to please Chris they same way she was positive Chris would be able to do for her. Then Chris looked up at her and every ounce of nerves she had a second before melted away. She found nothing but comfort and confident in the green eyes staring up at her. She knew that everything would be ok. Chris kissed her again in that same place before kissing down the valley between her breasts, over her belly button, finally settling herself between her legs. She kissed and sucked and nibbled on the inside of her thighs, making her way closer and closer to her goal. She pulled her hair back out of the way and placed soft, slightly teasing, kisses on Amanda's lower lips. Amanda's breathing was heavy and she let out light whimpers. Chris placed one more soft kiss before parting her folds with her tongue, gathering her wetness and circling her clit with her tongue. Amanda whimpered and moaned and let her breaths come out in short pants. She wasn't sure what to do with her hands so she grabbed ahold of the sheets on either side of her and held on.

The guys at TARU weren't sure what to do about what was happening on their monitors. They were supposed to watch at all times but that seemed a little wrong now considering what was going on. They had two people on each shift to keep track of all the images showing up on their monitors. It was for both the detective's safety that they were ordered have eyes on the screens at all times. Watching them now, in their private moment, felt a little invasive and perverted. They made a call to Sgt Benson to ask what they should do. She told them to box the screen with all the views of the apartment so that it wasn't the main image and turn off the sound. "But don't clear out of that view completely" she warned them. She reminded them that it was for their safety and that both Chris and Amanda knew they'd be watching them. They followed her directions and turned off the sound then minimized the view of the bedroom so that it appeared on a smaller scale with every other camera, but didn't disappear completely from the screen.

In another apartment with the same images on the screen, someone else wasn't thinking about being so considerate. He watched closely studying their every move. Something about them was most definitely different from his other couples. There was a certain spark, a fire between them that he hadn't seen from the others. A smile came across his face and he inwardly celebrated the knowledge that he'd definitely found the right ones. He listened to the loud moans emitting from the monitors and watched as Amanda's body contorted underneath her lover. If only he could see exactly what she was doing to bring her such pleasure, he would, for a moment, be content.

Christina surrounded Amanda's bundle of nerves with her mouth and sucked. Amanda threw her head back into her pillow and let out a guttural moan as she came in her mouth. Christina continued to suck as rode out the waves of her orgasm. She licked and kissed and lightly sucked on her center as she calmed down and her body relaxed. She kissed her way back up Amanda's body until she met her lips, letting her taste herself on her tongue. She slid her hand between them and dipped her fingers into her heat, starting a steady rhythm. She brought her mouth to her neck and sucked, leaving a small mark in her wake. Amanda held on to Christina she moved her fingers inside of her, touching places that had never been touched before. She moaned louder and louder as Chris thrusts became deeper and harder. Chris repositioned herself, allowing her palm to rub against her clit with every thrust. It wasn't long before they came together, Amanda's muscles clamping down on Chris' fingers. When she felt her start to come down, Chris quickly moved down her body and latched onto her clit and started to suck as she moved her fingers, searching for that sacred spot inside her. When she found what she was looking for she pressed down and moved her fingers in a come hither motion as she continued to suck on her clit. Amanda latched on to Chris' hair and pushed her further into her as she experienced an orgasm unlike any other she'd ever had before. She couldn't believe the things Christina was able to do with her fingers and her tongue. She didn't ever want her to stop. She came again, and again, and again as Chris made love to her in every position that she could think of.

Finally, Chris couldn't take it anymore. She was so focused on pleasing Amanda that she'd put off another release for herself. She sat up and pulled Amanda up with her, intertwining their legs to bring their centers together. She ended their kiss and rested their foreheads together, in need of air. Their breaths came in short, hard pants as she grinded their clits together, bringing them both closer to orgasm. It wasn't much longer until they were both moaning in ecstasy. Amanda collapsed backwards, pulling Christina down with her. Chris reached down and pulled the cover up over them as the heat between them dissipated and the cool air hit their damp skin. They were both physically and emotionally exhausted and thinking nothing of the people watching them in their most intimate moments. They laid there, quiet and still, for a few moments before Chris moved to turn off the lamp on her side of the bed and Amanda did the same. She turned back over to lay at her side and Amanda turned to face her, capturing her lips in a sweet and loving kiss. There was no need for words to pass between them. They shared in the bliss of the comfortable silence in their now dark room. Amanda scoot into Chris and laid her head on her chest and they both closed their eyes to sleep.


	16. Chapter 16: A Nice Day in the Park

Chapter 16: A Nice Day in the Park

Amanda woke up the next morning, still laying on Chris' chest. She laid there quietly, riding the rise and fall of her chest. After some thought about the night before, it occurred to her that TARU had been watching them. It light blush covered her cheeks and she pulled the covers over her face. She tried not to let it bother her and closed her eyes to go back to sleep. She felt the bed shift and pulled the cover down to see Frannie sitting on the bed. She pulled the covers back over her face and was greeted with a loud bark. She quickly pulled the covers down and sat up.

"Shhh" she said putting her hand around her mouth. "I'm up, ok. I'm up. Just be quiet" she whispered. Christina turned over on her side and laughed at the exchange between Amanda and her dog. She slowly opened her eyes to meet Amanda's blues staring down at her. "Sorry" she said apologizing for waking her.

"It's ok" she said softly. She brought her hand up to touch Amanda's hair and brought it down to cup her cheek. Amanda covered her hand with her own and leaned down to kiss her. Chris quickly took the reins, flipping them over so that she was on top. She continued their kiss as she snaked her hand underneath the covers and between Amanda's legs, parting her thighs and dipping into wetness. Feeling that she was more than ready for her, she slipped two fingers inside of her. Amanda gasped at the sudden intrusion and threw her head back into the pillow. Her hand came up and she buried her fingers in Chris' thick mane as her head dipped down and her mouth latched onto her neck. They'd both forgotten about Frannie until she started barking at them and pulling at the covers with her teeth. They both laughed at her ploys to get their attention. Chris stopped what she was doing and laid her head on Amanda's chest. Frannie barked again and Amanda rolled her eyes.

"Alright, Frannie Mae" she said silencing her barking. "We get it". She sat on the bed panting and looking at them as if she knew if she got down and left they'd carry on with their activities and forget about her. Chris cleared her throat and sat up, holding the cover up over her chest. It took her a minute to work up the energy before she grabbed a sheet, wrapped it around herself, and scoot off the bed leaving Amanda laying there covered by the blanket. She found Amanda's t shirt and pulled it over her head before heading for the living room.

"Come on, Frannie" she called over her shoulder. Frannie jumped down from the bed and followed her to the kitchen where she got her fresh water and grabbed her food. She went over and filled her bowl then put her food back under the cabinet before walking back to the bedroom and going into the bathroom. She started the shower and pulled her t shirt off and looked into the bedroom at Amanda. She was leaning on her elbows in the bed staring at her through the open bathroom door. Chris stared at her as she stepped one leg into the shower. "Care to join me?" she asked seductively. Amanda thought for a minute about whether she wanted to go into the shower with her. She knew that the perp and the guys at TARU had watched them the night before so they wouldn't be seeing anything they hadn't seen already. She figured there was no need for being bashful now. She climbed out of bed and went into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. She walked over and stepped into the shower, immediately finding herself backed against the wall with Chris' lips covering her own. They picked up where they'd left off in bed before Frannie interrupted them. After forty minutes in the shower, not showering, they heard Frannie barking and scratching at the bathroom door. Amanda slid the shower door open and yelled at her to stop. Chris laughed, "I guess we better go take her out now, huh?" she asked kissing the back of her neck.

"Uh huh" she mumbled back. She turned around in Chris' arms and put her arms around her neck, kissing her sweetly on the lips. Chris backed her into the wall again and began kissing down her body until she was on her knees. She lifted Amanda, placing her legs on her shoulders and buried her face between her legs. Amanda let her head fall back against the wall of the shower and one of her hands found its way to Chris hair while the other held onto the support bar on the shower door.

He sat surrounded by monitors displaying the same scene. He couldn't understand what she was doing. What was she doing to draw such a powerful, visceral response out of her lover? What was it about her that was so pleasing? He slammed his fist down on the desk in anger because he couldn't think of anything. He couldn't figure out why beautiful, smart women like Amanda would chose to be with a butchy, dominate, man-wannabes like Christina. This time he wouldn't fail. He would get the answers he was looking for. He was sure that they were the right couple to tell him.

Sitting at their monitors in their private room, the two guys on the morning shift at TARU tried their best not to stare at the screen with a view of the shower. It became more and more difficult as the time passed. They'd now been in the shower for an hour and fifteen minutes. They talked about how they could go on and on for hours if they wanted to. "You know women don't have the same limitations that guys do" one of the techies said. "How haven't they run out of hot water yet?" the other asked. They just sat there, trying not to be nosey while still doing their jobs at the same time. Suddenly they got an alert on the trap they'd put on the set up in the detectives apartment. He'd moved from his cloned IP address and was now a sitting duck. They put a trace on the signal and followed it to an internet café just seven blocks from their undercover pad. They got on the phone to Sgt Benson and told her what they had. While they were giving her the information, they continued their efforts to lock down his personal IP address when they suddenly lost the signal. They tried to get it back but all they got was a signal that bounced from one IP address to another every thirty seconds; impossible to trace. "He must've used the café's wi-fi to connect and then used whatever virus he has to bounce his signal from any computer in the vicinity. We lost him" he said into the speaker.

"But he'll still be at the café right?" Olivia asked into the phone. She'd been eating breakfast with Brian when she got the call and was now in her bedroom, quickly getting dressed as she talked to the TARU guys on the phone.

"Sure, he could be but he also could be anywhere in the area up to maybe a block away in any direction. All he needs is a strong enough router to get onto to the café's network and then he can use other people's addresses to spoof his own. Since they don't use passwords or firewalls or anything because their wi-fi's free, it wouldn't take him much to figure it out" he said explaining things in the simplest terms possible.

"Damn it" she breathed out. "Alright, just stay on it. Call me back if you get anything new". She hung up the phone and made calls to Nick and Fin telling them they needed to meet up to discuss their new developments. Nick had both Zara and Gil and Fin had both of his grandkids so they decided on the park so the kids could play. She agreed and hung up with them to call Rollins and Reyes. She called each of their phones twice and got no answer so she called TARU back and asked where they were. They told her that they were in the shower and from the amount of time they'd been in there they should be ready to get out soon. Olivia understood what they hinting at and hung up the phone. Five minutes later her phone rang and it was Rollins calling her back. She told them they were headed to the park and that they needed to meet them there. She went back to the bathroom where, Chris was standing in front of the mirror blow drying her hair. She shut off the dryer when she saw Amanda standing there with her phone to her ear.

"Olivia, Nick and Fin are going to the park. They're taking the kids to play. You wanna go?" she asked. Her tone of voice told Chris that something was up and they didn't really have a choice in going to meet them.

"Yeah, that sounds good" she said nodding her head. Amanda turned and walked over to the closet as Chris turned the blow dryer back on to finish drying her hair.

"Yeah, we'll be there" she said looking through her clothes for something to wear. "Half hour's perfect. We'll see you then" she said before hanging up and tossing her phone on the bed. She heard the dryer stop in the bathroom and a moment later Christina was standing next to her at the closet. She reached in and pulled a dark gray tank top and black jacket down from their hangers. Then she went over to the dresser pulled out a bra and underwear from one drawer and a pair of black jeans from another. Amanda chose an orange halter, a white jacket and a pair of blue jeans.

"Who knew I'd marry such a girl" Chris said making fun of Amanda's bright colored shirt. Amanda lightly slapped her on the shoulder and finished getting dressed. She called for Frannie to come over to her and she attached her leash to her collar. Chris put her thick, curly hair up into a pony tail and slipped on a pair of gray flip flops before pocketing her phone and keys. Amanda got Frannie's dog bag and threw in a bunch of her toys, her water bowl, a container of food, hand sanitizer and sunscreen then went to the kitchen to get a bottle of water and a bag of her favorite treats. She suggested they pack food take it with them and make it a picnic. "Ok" Chris said with a shrug of her shoulder. They packed a mix of animal meats and vegetarian meats, cheeses, bread, chips and fruits. Christina drew the line at packing any drinks saying she wasn't carrying all of that all the way to the park.

"Fine. You carry the food and the dog bag and I'll carry the drinks" Amanda said. Chris took the two bags from her and Amanda grabbed the drinks and Frannie's leash and they left the apartment to head to the park. It was a perfect day outside; warm and sunny with a nice cool breeze. As they were walking up, the kids saw Frannie and ran over to play with her, leaving Nick and Fin, who they were playing catch with, all on their lonesome. Chris traded the dog bag for the drinks with Amanda and found a picnic table close by. Amanda stayed with Frannie and the kids. She took off her leash and put it in the bag then dug out her favorite ball. The kids took turns throwing it for her run after it and bring it back. After a couple minutes, Liv called for Amanda to come over to the table so they could talk. She slowly walked away, stopping to look back at the kids play with Frannie.

"Amanda, come on" Nick said seeing her hesitation to leave them alone. "The kids will be fine". Amanda took a deep breath and started walking again.

"I don't think it's the kids she's worried about" Chris said under her breath.

"People and their dogs" Fin said getting a laugh from everyone. Amanda sat down at the table next to Christina.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

"Oh nothing babe" Chris said putting her arm over her shoulder. Amanda looked around the table and they all started laughing again at the same time. Amanda jabbed Chris in the side, knowing that they were laughing at her. Chris put her hand under Amanda's chin and tilted her head back, giving her a quick kiss on the lips. She playfully pushed her away and pretended to pout. "Aww, we didn't mean it" Chris said still slightly laughing.

"Yeah, I'm sure you didn't" Amanda said glaring at all of them.

"Come on, Amanda. It's funny" Fin said. "You worry about the dog like somebody's gonna try to kidnap it".

"Her name is Frannie Mae and you never know" she said. They continued laughing at her only because she seemed really serious. "Alright, laugh it up" she said rolling her eyes. "So, what's the real reason for this impromptu trip to the park?" she asked looking at Olivia. The laughter died down and they got serious about the conversation they were about to have.

"TARU got a hit on the trap they set in your apartment. They traced it to a café a couple blocks from here, only seven blocks from your apartment. They think he hacked into their network and is just using their connection. His signal starting bouncing between IP addresses before they could trace his" she explained.

"Well couldn't we have just gone to the café?" Nick asked. "Maybe he still would've been there". Chris shook her head.

"No, he wouldn't have. He's too smart for that" Chris said. "He's gone to all this trouble to fake his IP address, I don't think he'd sit in public and watch our place".

"Hey, Zara stop!" Nick yelled at his daughter. "You have to share the ball". Amanda looked over to check on Frannie. She was having fun running around with the kids and knew she'd come over to bug her when she was ready for water.

"Ok, so where does that leave us?" Fin asked.

"Nowhere" Amanda said clearly frustrated by this guy. "He's all over the map. His victims lived in different parts of the city. He's given no hints to anything; not where he lives or where he works. This guy has no comfort zone. All we know is that he's tech savvy and hyper-religious".

"Nick" Chris said pulling his attention away from the kids.

"Yeah" he said. "Be subtle, ok. Two o'clock, behind the tree. That's a camera right?" she asked. He glanced casually in the direction that Chris was pointing him in and sure enough there was a man, who fit their perp's description, hiding behind a tree snapping pictures.

"I'll be damned. It is" he said confirming what she saw.

"What do we do?" Fin asked looking to Liv for direction. "We can't take him now. Not with the kids here".

"There's nothing to take him in for. He's just some guy in the park who likes taking pictures of strangers" Amanda said.

"So we wait" Olivia said. "Just keep watching, hope he sticks around as long as Chris and Amanda are here. When he leaves, we follow him. We stay on him until we have something solid to take him in on" she said. They all nodded their heads in agreement.

He kept taking pictures of them sitting at the picnic table, talking amongst themselves and watching the kids play. He snapped picture after picture waiting for that perfect shot to come along. It took a few minutes but eventually he got what he was waiting for. Amanda leaned over and whispered something in Christina's ear and she laughed. They looked into each other's eyes, foreheads touching, laughing together. Snap. Their lips came together in a chaste kiss. Snap. Chris' arm came up around Amanda as she let her head fall to rest on her shoulder. Snap. He took the camera from in front of his face and looked at them through his own natural lenses. He couldn't believe how perfect they were. He couldn't wait to get his hands on them. Just a little while longer for observation and he'd be ready. He continued watching as they got up from the table and went to play with the kids. Amanda got Frannie's Frisbee and showed them how to throw it so Frannie could catch it in the air. He snapped more pictures of them together, with the dog and the kids and their friends. He couldn't tear his eyes away. Eventually they went back over to the table to sit and have lunch. They passed around the sanitizer and helped the kids make up their sandwiches and pick their chips and fruits. Amanda set out Frannie's food and poured water in her bowl so she could sit and eat with them. They picnicked and enjoyed the beautiful day. Amanda, Chris and Nick kept watch since Olivia and Fin's backs were facing where the perp was hiding. He was still there, watching and snapping the occasional picture. They did their best to pretend he wasn't there and enjoy their afternoon in the park. She hadn't taken her eyes away for more than a minute when she realized he was gone.

"Ummm, we lost our special guest" Amanda said. Both Chris and Nick looked up and saw that she was right. He was gone and they had no way of tracking him down.

"Great" Chris said under her breath. "That's just fu…ow" she said when she felt a quick jab in the side. She looked over to see Amanda glaring at her. She realized she was about to drop a bad word in front of the kids. She cleared her throat and decided to keep the rest of her statement to herself. They finished lunch and let the kids play for a while longer before calling it a day. Olivia let them know that she'd be in touch with anything new and they parted ways. Amanda and Chris got back to their apartment at four thirty and decided to take a nap. Chris stripped down to her underwear and climbed into bed. Amanda took off her clothes and bra and put on a t shirt before getting in bed with her girlfriend. Frannie came in and jumped on the bed with them, settling down at the end. It didn't take long at all before all three of them were fast asleep. They woke up a couple of hours later and Chris made dinner for them. They ate and watched tv for awhile, then Amanda sat down to the computer to get their business in order. Chris took Frannie out while Amanda worked so she wouldn't have to do it when she was done. She returned to the apartment just as Amanda was finishing up their books. She saved everything, shut down the computer and turned out the lights before going to the bedroom. She kicked Frannie out of her spot and down to the foot of the bed then climbed in next to her girlfriend to go to sleep.


	17. Chapter 17: I Need to Know

Chapter 17: I need to Know

The next few days went by without incident. Chris and Amanda went on with their fake marriage and fake business and even made some new friends to keep up fake appearances. He hadn't resurfaced on any public networks, even for a short period of time, and they hadn't seen him following them since the day in the park. Chris was enjoying being with Amanda but she was honestly ready to move back home. She was getting calls from her parents everyday about her sister acting out and her mother had been in the hospital for a few days but was back home now. She didn't go visit her while she was there. She knew the perp didn't go after his victims' family members but she still want to take the chance. There was always a possibility that he his MO could change and she didn't want to put her family in jeopardy. She called Robbie Jr and told him he needed to step up and be the tough big brother. He needed to worry about more than just who she was dating and start worrying about her getting to school and getting her homework done and respecting their mom and dad. After talking to him, she told him to put Jeza on the phone.

"What?" she said getting on the line with an attitude.

"Don't what me?" she said back with just as much attitude. "Jeza, you are testing my patience. Do _not_ make me come home because you will not like what I do. I'm not mami or papa or Robbie. No soy tu amigo. No me importa sobre tus sentimientos. You better get your shit together. I'm not playing around. If I get one more call from anyone telling me anything negative about you, I will come home and I will have surprise for you. And not the fun kind. ¿Entiendes?" She heard nothing but silence from the other end of the phone. "Jeza, don't fuck with me. Answer me when I ask you a question. Do you understand me?"

"Yeah" she said forcefully. Christina took a deep breath and didn't let the attitude her sister was sending her way get her any angrier.

"Goodbye Jezalyn" she said. She immediately heard the line disconnect and then hung up the phone. Amanda came out of the bedroom and sat down on the couch with her. Chris groaned and laid her head in her lap.

"How's your mother?" she asked, rubbing her back.

"Better" Chris answered.

"Your sister's still…"

"Being a spoiled little shit?" she said finishing her question. "Yep". Amanda laughed and shook her head.

"Well, just be glad…" she leaned down and put her mouth next to her ear, "that she's not crazy enough to frame you for murder" she whispered. Chris chuckled.

"I never underestimate her hatred for me" she said. "Can we order pizza? I'm starving". Frannie came over and jumped on the couch and laid her head on Chris' back. "Why do you think I'm your pillow?" she said looking over her shoulder at her. Frannie just laid there comfortably. Chris turned back to Amanda. "So, pizza?" she asked.

"Ok, pizza" Amanda said in agreement. She leaned her head down and kissed her softly on the lips. Frannie lifted her head and watched them. She gave a loud bark before she jumped down and went over to Amanda and started licking her face. Chris backed away and Frannie jumped up on the couch in Amanda's lap and settled down. Amanda laughed and rubbed her behind the ears while kissing her on top of her head. Chris just shook her head.

"You're such a jealous bitch" she said looking at Frannie. Amanda glared at her. "Well, she is….literally".

"Go order the pizza" she said, still petting Frannie. Christina got up from the couch, grabbed her phone and went to get the pizza menu. "She didn't mean it" Amanda whispered to Frannie before giving her another kiss. Chris ordered their dinner and they watched tv until it arrived. They put it a movie to watch while they ate and then took Frannie out for her evening walk. When they got back to the apartment, they took quick showers and got ready for bed. Amanda laid down and turned off her lamp while Chris sat up in bed and read her book. After fifteen minutes of not being able to fall asleep with the light on, Amanda turned over to see if her girlfriend looked tired at all. She didn't.

"How much longer are you gonna read?" she asked.

"Is the light bothering you? I can go in the living room" Chris offered. She started to get out of bed but Amanda stopped her.

"No, stay. I'm fine" she said pulling on her to stay put. "What are you reading?"

"The Hunger Games" she answered.

"Mhnm" Amanda mumbled, relaxing into her pillow and closing her eyes. Chris put her book on the night stand and turned off her lamp then scoot in close to Amanda, spooning her from behind. "I didn't say you had to stop reading" she mumbled tiredly.

"I know" Chris whispered. Amanda fell asleep within five minutes of the light going out. Chris laid in bed and thought about everything that was going on at home. Her mother was sick, her father was struggling to take care of her and Jeza, and Robbie was no help at all. This time with Amanda had been great. She'd grown so much as a person and had learned a lot about herself. But she was ready for this whole thing to be over. She wanted this guy, whoever he was, to make his move and end this. She took a deep breath and tried to clear her mind. It took her a while but eventually she fell asleep. The next day, Chris and Amanda spent all morning and half the afternoon finishing up a big order. Nick and Fin came over to help them deliver it and they decided to meet up later that evening for dinner, purposefully choosing the Italian restaurant that the victims had in common. Amanda took Frannie out for a walk before dinner while Chris stayed home and tidied up their online orders. When Amanda returned to the apartment, they got cleaned up and dressed for dinner. Chris walked over to Amanda who was standing at the closet, trying to decide what to wear.

"Can you zip me?" she asked. She turned around and moved her hair so Amanda could get to the zipper on her shirt. It was red and sleeveless and came up around her neck like a choker chain would. She wore long black slacks and red heels with a black bracelet and stud earrings. She looked at Amanda who was still wrapped in a towel, undecided on what she was going to wear. "You know we're supposed to be at the restaurant in…forty minutes" she said looking at her watch. Amanda turned around and glared at her and Chris held up her hands defensively, "I'm just saying". She stood there watching her for a moment longer before walking up behind her and wrapping her arms around her waist. She rested her chin on her shoulder and looked into the closet with her. "What about that shirt?" she suggested pointing to a green and black wrap around that she'd never seen Amanda wear before. "You can wear those white pants and I have a pair of black boots you can wear". Amanda thought about it for a minute before pulling the shirt and pants down from their hangers.

"Are you gonna suggest what underwear I should put on too?" she asked.

"Well, none would be easiest…" she whispered seductively, "for me anyway" she added. Amanda laughed and pulled away from her so that she could get dressed. "I'll go make sure that Frannie has enough food and water" she said walking towards the living room.

"Ok. I'll be ready in a couple minutes" Amanda said stepping into her pants. "I need the boots" she yelled to Chris as she walked into the bathroom. She quickly put on her make up then came back out to the bedroom to put on Chris' boots. They both grabbed their wallets, keys and phones and headed out the door. They arrived at the restaurant right on time. Olivia had made a reservation for them so they were seated right away. Each of them tried something different than they'd had their first time there. They were enjoying a nice meal all the while keeping their eyes open for any middle aged white men paying special attention to Chris and Amanda.

"Christina?" Chris looked over her shoulder to see a very familiar face from her past. "Christina Reyes. God, I thought that was you" she said looking into familiar eyes.

"Beth" she said in disbelief. She couldn't believe that Beth Potter was standing in front of her. Beth was a tall, biracial beauty with light caramel skin, compliments of her white mother and black father, and beautiful brown hair. She wore a black shirt and slacks with black heels. She looked stunning. Chris stood up and hugged her. Beth took in her familiar scent and warm embrace. It was the same as she'd always remembered. She pulled back before she could catch her web like she knew Chris had the ability to do. "What are you…what are you doing in New York?"

"I live here" she said. Chris could've been knocked over with a feather. "Don't look so excited" Beth said seeing the look of dread on her face.

"Uh, no, I…I'm just….I'm…I'm surprised is all" she said barely able to string together a sentence. "You always said you'd never leave California".

"Yeah, well" she said with a shrug, "I've changed". Christina could tell by the tone of Beth's voice that the "I've changed" she just gave her was a hint. It was the "I've changed so maybe we can try this again" kind of "I've changed".

"Oh" she said, not sure how else to respond. Everyone sat at the table quietly watching the reunion between what looked like old friends, most likely more than friends. Amanda was uncomfortable but she didn't say anything. She just sat and listened like everyone else. "So what changed you?" Chris asked curiously. "I mean, what changed your mind…about leaving California?"

"A job" she said simply. "I'm starting on the board of directors at the David Zwirner gallery in two weeks" she said proudly.

"Oh my god" Chris said genuinely excited for her. "That's…that's great. Congratulations".

"Thank you" she said smiling.

"Oh my god" Chris said realizing that she was being completely rude to her friends but most importantly her girlfriend. "I'm sorry" she said looking at Olivia, Nick and Fin. She turned around and looked at Amanda, who'd finished her entire glass of wine during their little chat. "I'm sorry" Chris said again. "Ummm, Beth these are my friends Olivia, Nick and Fin" she said pointing to each of them as she said their names. She turned back to Amanda and grabbed her hand, pulling her from her chair to stand next to her, "And this is Amanda….my wife" she added hesitantly. She didn't know what kind of reaction Beth would have to the news but she was sure it would be interesting.

"Your wi…your wife" she said surprised. "Wow. Con…congratulations" she said looking at Chris. "You must be…really special to get this one to settle down" she said looking at Amanda.

"She is" Chris said softly. Amanda smiled and blushed lightly. She suddenly didn't feel so insecure. Beth was now visibly uncomfortable. She took this as her opening to excuse herself.

"Well, I should go. My dinner companions are waiting" she said. "It was nice to meet you all" she said looking at Chris' friends, still seated at the table before turning back to Amanda. "And it was nice to meet you, Amanda" she said nicely.

"Nice to meet you too" she said back.

"Chris, it was great seeing you. And congratulations again" she said with a little sadness in her voice. She walked away towards her table and Chris and Amanda took their seats again.

"And who was that?" Fin asked. He was asking partly because he thought she was a very good looking woman, but something told him he wasn't her type, and partly because he didn't like the vibe going on between them. He was being like a protective big brother for Amanda, assessing the situation and making sure she wouldn't get hurt.

"Beth…Potter. She was an art history professor, ummm, at my university in California" she answered. Olivia and Fin looked at her like they knew there was more to the story but didn't know if they wanted to ask.

"How'd you cross paths?" Nick asked. "You weren't an art major were you?" Of course he'd be the one that wasn't shy to ask the obvious question, even though it was none of his business.

"No, I wasn't" she said, "but my best friend was. He, uh, did a painting of me for one of his projects and it was chosen for the school of the arts showcase…and I went with him. That's where I met her" she explained. Amanda knew that Nick was gonna keep asking questions so she butted in.

"She seems nice" she said, giving Nick a look that said mind your own business. He got the message loud and clear.

"Yeah" Chris said taking a drink of her wine, "she is".

"Maybe we should have her over for dinner sometime" she suggested. Chris was surprised that Amanda was suggesting it but she thought it would look bad if she argued.

"Yeah, sure" she said agreeing, "if you want" she added, letting her know it was entirely her decision. Amanda nodded her head. Chris smiled and cleared her throat, taking another drink from her glass. They stayed at the restaurant for a little while longer before deciding to call it a night. On their way out, Chris stopped by Beth's table to exchange numbers with her so they could discuss her coming to dinner. She said goodbye and walked out of the restaurant hand in hand with Amanda. Christina spotted a man at the edge of the parking lot watching them as they stood outside the restaurant talking. She took out her phone and sent a text to everyone. Their phones alerted them simultaneously and they took them out to check their messages. It read "_He's here. This is our shot". _They all nodded and pocketed their phones then started walking to their cars. Olivia and Fin were parked next to each other on one side of the parking lot and Nick was parked one row and a couple cars over from them. Chris and Amanda were parked in the last row so Olivia, Nick and Fin where able to have eyes on them as they walked to their car. They saw the man start to walk towards them and pulled their guns, preparing to move in. Chris opened Amanda's door so that she could get into the car. He increased his pace, knowing this was his chance to take them. He pulled his knife out of his pocket and came up behind Christina, wrapped his arm around her and placed the blade to her throat.

"Don't scream or I'll slit her throat" he said looking at Amanda who was sitting down in the passenger seat. She nodded her head and sat perfectly still, not wanting to make any sudden movements that might startle him. "Get out of the car" he directed. She stepped out of the car and shut the door behind her. She could see Nick coming from one side of them and Olivia and Fin coming from the other.

"Freeze" Nick yelled from behind him, weapon drawn and trained on the perp. He whipped around and pressed his back to the truck parked next to Christina's car, pulling her with him to use as a shield. He pressed the blade firmly into her throat, cutting through the fabric of her shirt and causing blood to trickle from her neck. "Drop the knife" he yelled. Chris breathed slowly through the pain the knife was causing her and tried to remain calm.

"Just let her go" Fin yelled with his weapon also up and trained on the suspect. He didn't have an angle to take the shot or else he would've blown the guy's head off. Amanda stood there assessing the situation. There were three guns pointed at a man who was using her girlfriend as a human shield. Nick had the best angle but one wrong move, one second of hesitation on the shot and Chris could be hit.

"Just back off" he said keeping a strong grip on Chris and the knife to her throat. "Let me finish".

"You know we can't do that" Olivia said, "You're already finished. You've got nowhere to go. Just put the knife down and you won't get hurt".

"But….but they're perfect" he said desperately. He needed to finish what he started. He needed answers and he knew that Chris and Amanda were the right ones. It wasn't supposed to end like this. "I need…I need to know…." He said softly. "I need to know". He repeated that same sentence over and over again and all of them were thinking the same thing. What did he need to know?

"It's ok. All you have to do is put the knife down" Olivia said, lowering her weapon. She looked at Fin and Nick, who held their guns steady and nodded, letting her know they had her covered. She took a few steps closer to the man holding Christina hostage, showing him she wasn't a threat. She was there to help him. "Just put the knife down, ok? I promise….I promise" she said firmly, "We'll help you find out everything you need to know". She slowly stepped closer and closer and he tightened his grip on the blade, pulling it back further into Chris' neck, deepening her cut. She winced in pain and Olivia stopped her movements. "If you hurt her, then you won't find out anything" she said. "You need her. You need both of them. I want to help you, I do. But in order for that to happen, you have to drop the knife" she said hoping he would listen to her. Blood was flowing down Chris neck, staining her already red shirt a deeper shade of red. "Drop the knife" Olivia encouraged him. They waited for what felt like minutes but in reality was only about fifteen seconds. He moved the blade away from her neck and held it out to the side, opening his hand and letting it fall to the pavement. Chris moved out of his grasp and immediately brought her hand up to her neck, covering her wound. Amanda and Fin grabbed her and helped her sit on the hood of the car while Olivia and Nick cuffed the perp and secured the knife. They called an ambulance for Chris who of course argued that she didn't need one. Cragen showed up on the scene and ordered her to let the medics check her out, had the knife sent to the lab and the perp escorted to the precinct. After some discussion, they got in their cars and headed to the precinct to hopefully get a confession and close out this case. They were in the Captain's office discussing strategy when the door opened and Reyes walked in.

"What are you doing here?" Cragen asked.

"I work here" Chris said joining their huddle. Cragen started to talk again but Chris knew he was going to say something about her needing to go home and take it easy. "I got checked out by the paramedics. I'm fine" she said before he could say anything. "I wanna be here".

"Alright" he said deciding not to send her home. "You're watching through the window. Nothing more" he said in a tone that let her know there wasn't going to be any discussion. She nodded her head in understanding. As much as wanted to take a crack at this guy, she knew how either herself or Amanda doing the interrogation could cause problems later on. When Barba arrived, they went over all the evidence they had so far and then the Captain sent Olivia and Nick to start the interrogation. They started with his name and went from there. Their perp was forty one year old Norman Rankins, the pastor of a small church. It turned out that his wife of twenty two years, a petite blonde with blue eyes, left him for another woman. She was a contractor named Hannah who had dark hair and green eyes. They'd hired her to do some work on the building the held their services in. His wife, Lily, had been sneaking around with the contractor behind his back for months during the renovations. When the work was finally done and it was time for Hannah to move on, Lily informed him that she was going with her. She didn't know what had come over her but she'd fallen in love with the woman and she didn't want to be with him anymore. She didn't ask for anything in the divorce. She just wanted him to let her go. She told him all of this, packed up her things and handed him divorce papers all in the same day.

"I tried to convince her that she wasn't well. She needed to fight her….evil, sinful urges" he said telling the story of how his wife left him. "She wouldn't hear any of it" he said sadly. "I was too late. The devil had already taken control of her soul". Olivia and Nick listened attentively and didn't interrupt. He was sharing freely and they didn't want him to shut down should they start asking him questions. He went on and on about his wife and her lover and how he'd lost her and Nick was getting tired of listening to him. He wanted him to start talking about the women he'd killed. He wanted to take his confession and send him to be locked in the hole he'd so rightfully earned.

"Ok, Norman" he said finally interrupting his story. "You're wife left you and I'm sure that was hard to accept. I mean, she took a vow…in front of God and everyone that she'd be with you and only you for the rest of your lives. It must've been devastating when she asked you for a divorce. That's one sin. Then she takes off with another woman….and that's another. You were angry. I get that…but why hurt these other women?" he asking opening the file and taking out the pictures of his victims, spreading them on the table in front of him. "They never did anything to you or anyone else. They were good people" he said.

"They were not good people!" he yelled, slamming his fists down on the table in anger. "They were abominations before God" he said in softer tone. "They lied. They said their union was ordained by the Holy Spirit and that it was acceptable in the eyes of the Lord. Two women taking the sacred vow of marriage, destroying the foundation of the home, planning to bring children into that despicable arrangement, threatening to tarnish the next generation of God's people". He shook his head from side to side, "The Lord does not ordain those things".

"So you killed them?" he asked. "That's not what God wants from his people pastor. God condemns murder".

"And I will be judged for what I have done and rightfully so" he said. "But I had to do it. I needed to know" he said repeating the sentence he'd said so many times when they were in the parking lot.

"What did you need to know, Norman?" Olivia asked. He looked at the pictures of the women he'd killed spread out on the table in front of him and thought about everything he'd tried to get out of them before their deaths. None of them had been helpful. None of them had repented. So he put them to death and sent them to their eternity of fire and brimstone. He knew that the one who could answer all of his questions was still out there. This was his chance to get to her.

"I want to talk to Christina" he said. Chris watched from behind the window and smiled a little when she heard him say her name. She wanted nothing more than to go in there and take this bastard down but she knew convincing the captain to let her would be a job and a half. She waited and listened to see how this would play out.

"That's, uh, that's not gonna happen, Norman" Olivia said denying his request.

"Then I have nothing else to say". He put his hands on the table and intertwined his fingers. "Arrest me and get me my lawyer".

**Spanish-English Translations**

**No soy tu amigo**- I'm not your friend

**No me importa sobre tus sentimientos**- I don't care about your feelings

**Entiendes?- **Do you understand?


	18. Chapter 18: Reasons

Chapter 18: Reasons

When they heard him ask for a lawyer, Captain Cragen knocked on the window signaling for Olivia and Nick to rejoin them in his office. Nick gathered the pictures of the victims from the table and returned them to the folder then he and Olivia stood up and left the interrogation room. Christina wondered whether the captain would let her go in to talk to him. Technically they didn't need a confession. They had his DNA, his prints and the knife they were sure he'd used for the murders. All they needed was to formally arrest him and send him through booking to get his DNA into the system to compare to what they'd found on the bodies. It was open and shut. Nevertheless, she wanted to know why he'd done this.

"Alright, that's it" Barba said grabbing his briefcase. "Send him to processing. Get him a lawyer".

"Wait, we're not gonna try to get a confession?" Olivia asked.

"We don't need it" he said.

"Well, the families want answers" Nick said jumping in, "We should at least try to get some understanding of why he did this so we can explain it to them".

"You know just as well I as I do that there are no reasons". He turned and headed for the door.

"There're reasons" Chris said stopping him from leaving. "Maybe not any good ones but still, reasons".

"And I'm guessing you want to be the one to get those reasons from him?" he asked.

"Well, he did ask for me" she said with a shrug. He immediately shook his head.

"No, absolutely not" he said sitting his briefcase down again. "You and Rollins, you're witnesses. He attacked you. You can't take his confession. And, like I said, we don't need it. He left his DNA at every scene. If he takes this to trial, there's no jury that won't convict him, regardless of them not having his reasons".

"What about the families?" Fin asked. "Don't they have the right to know why they're loved ones were targeted?"

"Look, it's not like it'll be the first time I've questioned a suspect after he's attacked me. I've never had a problem before" Chris said. She was trying to stay casual but on the inside she desperately wanted them to send her in the room.

"It's up to you counselor" Cragen said looking to Barba for a decision. They waited patiently while he debated in his head.

"Alright" he finally said agreeing to send Chris in, "But watch your step" he warned her. She pulled her long black hair back into a tight ponytail, took the file they'd put together on the case from Nick then took a deep breath and walked into the interrogation room. She walked over to the table, put the file down and then sat across from him. She didn't say anything at first. She just stared at him and he stared back her, taking in every feature of her face.

"I was told you wanted to talk to me" she said in a flat tone.

"It's nice to finally see your face up close and personal, in good lighting" he said pointing to the lights above them. "You really are an exquisitely beautiful woman" he complimented her. Chris kept staring at him, completely unaffected by his flattery. "You're not going to say anything?" he asked.

"Exquisitely beautiful is redundant" she said still staring blankly at him. He chuckled lightly at her.

"And smart too" he said. "If you showed a little more….feeling, you'd be the whole package".

"Is that why you wanted to talk to me?" she asked with a small smirk. "To tell me that I'm beautiful and smart?"

"And Amanda" he went on, not acknowledging her question, "she's…she's really quite beautiful as well. And smart. She handles all the financials for your business right?" he asked rhetorically. "I would've thought it would be the other way around. When I first saw you two together, I pegged you as the one who'd "wear the pants" in the relationship but you wear the…well not the pants. At least that's what I thought when I saw you in the kitchen baking. Then I heard you talking about your trouble as a teenager and you wrangling your family, and in the bedroom…" he paused as he thought back to her night of lovemaking with Amanda. "Well, I'll just say that I was thoroughly impressed and there was no doubt left in my mind about who wears the pants". Christina just sat there and listened to him pontificate about the ridiculous stereotype about pants in a gay relationship. "You really don't talk much do you? I mean, not when you're not with your wife and your little group of friends….oh but wait. They're not really your friends are they?" he asked. "They're your co-workers". Chris detected in his voice that he was upset by her deception. "Is Amanda even really your wife?"

"No" she said simply. He clenched and unclenched his fists and breathed deeply to control his anger.

"Is she even a lesbian?" he asked.

"No" she said again.

"Was any of it real?" he asked getting more and more angry.

"No" she said for the third time. She still had a blank expression on her face and no emotion in her voice. Amanda shifted uncomfortably as she watched from behind the mirror and heard Christina say that nothing that happened between them was real. She couldn't tell if she was saying it to rile up the suspect or because she really meant it. She was pulled from her thoughts when she heard his fists slam down on the table. "Why so angry Norman?" Chris asked, saying his name in a mocking tone.

"Are you even a lesbian?" he asked still ignoring her questions. She thought about whether she should answer him truthfully or not.

"Yes, I am" she said deciding to be honest. He seemed to calm down in light of her admission. Maybe, she'd be able to answer his questions after all.

"May I pray for you?" he asked.

"No" she answered quickly.

"But you're sick" he said, "Afflicted with the disease of homosexuality. I must pray for you".

"Prayer doesn't work" she said leaning forward, resting her elbows on the table. "My mother's been praying for years". She could tell that he wasn't going to stop arguing about praying for her so she decided to move the conversation along. "Look, Norman" she said using the same mocking tone as before, "you asked for me for a reason. I know it wasn't because you wanted to pray for me so…why don't we get to it".

"What do you do?" he asked. Chris had no idea what he was talking about it. "To make women want you?" he added. Chris leaned back in her chair in disbelief. That's what he needed to know?

"I don't do anything" she said.

"No, you have to do something?" he said leaning forward in interest. "I watched you, for days. You attract the attention of everyone in every room you enter. Women flock to you. I saw it the first time I saw you, at the bar". He needed to understand her charm.

"I don't do anything" she said again.

"Stop saying that!" he yelled. "You have to tell me what makes you so…intriguing. Why do women, straight women, want…._you_?" he asked. Finally, Christina understood what all of this was about.

"So, that's why you did all of this?" she asked. He clearly didn't understand what she was asking. "You want to know why you're wife, your straight wife, left you for another woman" she said as more of a statement than a question. "That's why you chose couples that reminded you of Lily and Hannah, right?" He didn't answer her question. He just looked at her quietly, hoping that she'd be the one to give him the answers he was looking for. "Ok, here it is" she said leaning for again. "You ready?" He nodded his head and waited in anticipation of what she was going to say. "I'm a woman" she said simply. Then she leaned back in her chair and waited for his reaction.

"What does that mean?" he asked. "You're a woman and that's all it takes for you get other woman to live in sin with you?"

"Come on, Norman" she said rolling her eyes. "Let's stop pretending that this is about God and what's good in his eyes. We both know that's just a smokescreen for what this is really about. This is about you and your resentment over your wife leaving you". He just sat quietly, scowling at her. He wasn't any different than any other perp. He was just another man who didn't know how to take rejection like a normal, well-adjusted adult so he acted out. Unfortunately, his acting out involved rape and murder. "Ok". She decided to have a little fun with him before she gave him the real answer to his question, if she gave him an answer at all. "You want answers? I'll give you some answers. Women like me because I'm beautiful and smart and sometimes I'm funny. I'm nice….most of the time and I'm pretty honest. Women like honesty. I'm told that I have a certain amount of confidence that makes me…somewhat more attractive than the average person. And you're right. I don't show a lot of feeling which makes people have a certain amount of intrigue. It makes me…" she paused trying to think of the right word to use, "inaccessible. And you know what they say, people always want what they can't have. So there it is. _That_ is why women want me" she finished. He looked unsatisfied with her answer so she continued. "As for why straight women want me, I could make some guesses" she offered. He nodded his head and clear his throat then leaned in anticipation, "But….I think I'll keep my guesses to myself".

"Where's Amanda? I want to talk to her" he said wanting to move on since she refused give him the answers he wanted. She laughed.

"No" she said shaking her head. "You're not in charge. You don't get to make special requests. You wanna know why women choose me, straight women; specifically Amanda" she said going on giving fake answers to his fake questions. "Well, she didn't choose me. This was a job. It was all an act. But if she had chosen me over a man it probably would've been because I'm a woman" she said giving the same vague answer again. She was enjoying seeing him squirm. He was one of those men that could never understand a woman wanting to be with another woman. The type that thought that a woman needed a man for everything: providing, protecting, pleasure, love. He couldn't understand how his wife could find another woman more desirable than him. She decided that she'd take a chance at doing what would torture him more than anything. "That means that my guess at what a woman likes will always be better than yours. I know better what women want, what they feel, what keeps them coming….back" she said with a smirk, "than any man ever could. It's not hard to figure out unless you're a man or you're clueless. Unfortunately for you, you're both. I won't lie, I've had my share of straight women and they're all the same. They have the same questions that you have. They want to know what it's like. What's so good about it, about being with another woman? And I have their answers" she said arrogantly. "You will never be able to make a woman feel the way I can make a woman feel or the way Hannah made your wife feel. But straight women are…straight women. It's all about the sex to them so they always go back to what they came from. But your wife didn't come back. Sorry to break it to you, but that probably means that she was never straight to begin with".

"You're wrong" he said angrily. "Lily was a heterosexual just as God made her. It was that deviant Hannah. She filled her head with lies and introduced her soul to evil. She was happy being my wife before that…that devil came along!" he yelled standing up from his chair. "Its women like you, possessed by evil spirits that are corrupting the God-fearing women like my wife, filling their lives with sin. You're despicable!"

"Well, if you have all the answers what do you need me for? Or Amanda?" she asked. "More importantly" she opened the file with the pictures of his victims inside, "why did you need Rachel and Jessica or Lauren and Isabelle or Hallie and Kaitlyn?" she asked placing their pictures one by one on the table in front of him. He looked at their pictures and went through it all in his mind. All the questions he'd asked them. All the unsatisfactory answers they'd given. He didn't know what answers would be enough for him but he knew he hadn't heard them.

"They were liars" he said pushing their pictures away. "The bible speaks clearly about women laying with other women being unnatural".

"Romans 1: 26" she said receiving a surprised look from him. "What you don't think I know scripture?" she asked. "How else would I know that you're full of shit?"

"You're obviously beyond redemption but Amanda isn't. I want to talk to her" he said in calm voice.

"No" she said simply. "I told you. You're not in charge. Anyways, I like Amanda. I think I'm gonna keep her. It's like you said. She's beautiful and smart and she shows a lot more feeling than I do". Amanda decided to excuse herself from the room. She didn't want to hear anything else Chris had to say about her. "You're pathetic" she said bluntly. "You try to hide behind this façade of a good pastor carrying out the will of God, ridding the world of abominations but really you're just a man who's small and angry because he lost his wife to a woman".

"No, I'm angry because I couldn't save her from her evil desires" he argued.

"You're angry because your wife left you for another woman and your ego is bruised. You kidnapped these women" she said pushing their pictures back towards him. "You beat them and raped them, not because you wanted them to answer your idiotic questions but because you couldn't get to your ex-wife and her lover so you took it out on them. And when that wasn't enough to get out all of your anger and frustration, you killed them. But that wasn't enough either, was it? The excitement you got from the thought of getting revenge on your wife, it wasn't enough to do it just once. But you had it all wrong this entire time. Taking all these women who looked like Lily and Hannah was wrong. And you might've have found Amanda and I and thought that we were perfect but you were wrong about that too. She's not you're wife and I'm not Hannah" she said. "And it wouldn't have mattered how many blonde haired, blue eyed and dark haired, green eyed women you found. There's only one couple that can give you the satisfaction you're looking for. And seeing as how you'll never see them again, you know because you're going to prison, that feeling of fulfilment that you're wanting….you're never going to have it". She gathered the pictures and put them back in the folder before standing up from the table. She walked over to the door then turned back to look at him. "So the way that you physically tortured those women is how you'll be tortured mentally for the rest of your pathetic life. As you should be".

"You can't do this" he said angrily. "You can't just….you can't just…"

"I can't just what?" she asked trying to pull it out of him. "I can't just leave you wanting for answers, leave you without the peace of mind you're looking for. Without telling you all the ways that you were….so inadequate that you're wife left you for another woman, a woman like me. We both know that nothing I tell you is going to be satisfying" she said torturing him in not quite the same way that he'd tortured his victims but what was as good as she was going to get. "Anyways, I didn't come in here for you to find out what you need to know. I came in here to find out what I need to know. And now that I know what I need to know, this conversation is over. Was there a particular lawyer that you wanted to call?" she asked smugly. She opened the door and walked back into the captain's office, ignoring his yelling for her to come back. She shut the door and leaned back against it, letting her head fall back and her eyes close. She took deep breaths to collect herself before opening her eyes to find everyone staring at her.

"You ok?" Cragen asked. She looked at everyone and noticed that Amanda was missing.

"Where's Amanda?" she asked.

"She stepped out" Fin said. "I don't think she appreciated what you had to say about her in there" he added with a hint of lack of appreciation of his own in his voice. She ignored him, not really caring what he thought and left the office to go find Amanda. She wasn't at her desk or in any of the bathrooms. She asked some other detectives and uniforms if they'd seen her and one pointed in the direction of the crib. She climbed the steps and looked through the small window on the door. Amanda was inside sitting on one of the beds with her elbows on her knees, wringing her hands and staring down at the floor. She opened the door and went inside, closing it behind her before going to sit next to her on the bunk.

"Hey" she said softly. Amanda didn't say anything back. She just sat there, continuing to stare at the floor. "You know I didn't mean anything I said in there. I was just…trying to get under his skin" she said. Amanda ignored her and sat there quietly. Her mind went over and over the things she'd heard Chris say in the interrogation room. "Amanda" Chris said scooting closer to her on the bed. "You're really not gonna talk to me?" she asked. She couldn't believe that anything she'd said downstairs could upset Amanda this much. She continued to sit there like Chris wasn't even in the room let alone sitting there trying to talk to her. "Fine" she said getting up from the bed and walking to the door. "Let me know when you've gotten over yourself". Amanda looked up and glared at her. Chris opened the door and walked out going back down to the captain's office and shut the door behind her.

"What's going on?" she asked walking into what seemed to be an important decision.

"We have the families here" Cragen started explaining, "in the interview rooms. Olivia and Fin went and talked to them. They explained why their daughters were chosen by this creep". She nodded her head in understanding.

"Ok, so why do I sense that there's a problem?" she asked. The door opened behind her. She turned to see Amanda enter the office.

"They their wedding bands back" Olivia said, "But he won't tell us where he put them".

"They're not at his apartment?"

"CSU went over the place with a fine toothed comb" Fin said jumping in. "There's no evidence he ever took his victims there and they didn't find any rings matching the descriptions the families gave of the wedding bands".

"He's not giving it up unless he gets some sort of deal" Nick said. Chris and Amanda both looked to Barba.

"Absolutely not" he said seeing them look at him. "There's no way this guy is getting a deal. We've got him dead to rights on six murders and assault of an officer".

"So what he gets ten, maybe twenty years off of his sentence? He'll still be in prison for the rest of his life" Amanda said.

"If not then he lives with the satisfaction of knowing he still has his trophies" Chris said. She didn't want this asshole having any piece of any of his victims or any power over their families.

"DA wants to go for the death penalty. This is an easy win with a hate crime enhancement." he said, "He's not going to cut a deal". Chris scoffed.

"That's great" she said sarcastically, "Six women are dead, their families are in shambles and he's using this to tack on some votes in the next election" she said annoyed.

"Chris" Cragen said in a warning tone.

"What? Am I the only one who thinks that this is ridiculous?" she asked looking around at everyone.

"No, but we can't get everything we want" Barba said.

"I'm sorry. I didn't realize this was about what we wanted" she said. "I thought this was about the victims and their families and making sure that bastard isn't able to exert any more control over them".

"She's right" Olivia said in agreement. "We can't let him keep anything that belonged to them. He's getting off on knowing that he has something the families want".

"Why don't you talk to your boss about taking the death penalty off the table?" Nick asked. "You have him on six murders with a hate crime enhancement plus assault of a police officer. It's like Rollins said he still be spending the rest of his life behind bars".

"It's not like he'll be getting off easy" Fin said. Barba listened to all of their arguments and considered what they were saying.

"Alright" he said after some thought, "Let me make some calls, see what I can do". He grabbed his briefcase and walked out of the office. Amanda looked over to see Chris looking at her and she held her gaze for a moment before looking away. They started discussing Chris and Amanda moving out of the undercover pad and back to their respective places. TARU had already started taking down the cameras and they'd brought in people to fix the holes in the walls. Fin said he'd call to find out when they'd need to be moved out. Barba came back in the office and told them they had a deal. The DA was willing to drop it down to life without the possibility of parole if he agreed to give up the victims' property. Olivia and Barba went into the interrogation room to talk to Rankins and Trevor Langan, his lawyer. He refused to tell them where he'd taken his victims and where he'd put their wedding bands. Barba made it clear that this was his one and only offer. He wouldn't be shaving off any more time from his sentence in exchange for the information. He finally relented and said he would give up the information but he'd only tell it Amanda. With that, they left the room and went back to the captain's office.

"What is it with this guy?" Nick asked annoyed by his antics. "What does think talking to Rollins is gonna get him?"

"Answers about his wife" Olivia said.

"What makes him think that?" Cragen asked. "She's never met his wife".

"Neither had any of his victims" Chris interjected, "but he still took them trying to get answers" she said using air quotes around answers. She didn't think for a second that this was about him wanting her to answer his questions. "He's an idiot who thinks that every blonde with blue eyes who's ever been with a woman must have the same reasons as his wife. Or at least that what he wants us to think he thinks".

"You think he has some other agenda?" Barba asked.

"Yeah' she said nodding her head. "It's just another way for him to be in control. He thinks we'll do what he wants because he has a bargaining chip". Cragen stood up from leaning on his desk.

"Then we don't give him what he wants". He took his hand out of his pocket and pointed at Christina. "Reyes, you go in there and don't come out without a location" he ordered. She nodded her head and took a deep breath as she walked over to the door to the interrogation and opened it. She went in and was met by a scowl from their perp.

"What are you doing here?" he asked angrily. Chris walked over to the table and pushed the legal pad and pen that were sitting on it towards him.

"Write down the address to location you took your victims and the location of where you left their wedding bands" she said. Her voice was again void of any emotion and her stance was uncompromising.

"I'm not telling you anything. I made it very clear to the other cops and to that lawyer" he said pushing the pad and pen away. "I'll only talk to Amanda".

"Detective Rollins isn't going to be coming into this room. You'll be talking to me" she said sternly. He shook his head from side to side.

"No, I won't. I won't tell you". He sat back in his chair and folded his arms over his chest. Langan stood up from his chair and buttoned his suit jacket.

"I think my client has made it clear that…."

"Shut up" Chris said interrupting him. "You will tell me" she said turning her attention back to Rankins, "because if you don't you'll be tried and convicted and there isn't a jury in the world that won't sentence you to death by lethal injection. You might believe that you're a God-fearing man and that dying is nothing to be afraid of but we both know that's not true. You're a coward and you, like any other fraud out there, are afraid to die. That's why you're gonna pick up that pen and you're write down what I wanna know" she said pushing the pad and pen back to him. "Now I could be wrong but I don't think I am so", she pulled out the chair in front of her and sat down, "I'm gonna call your bluff. I'm gonna sit here until I get what I want. And let's face it Norman, I've gotten everything I want up to this point. No sense in that changing now". She sat across the chair from him and stared him down. He and his lawyer could both see that she wasn't bluffing. Amanda wouldn't be coming in the room and she wouldn't be leaving until he told her what she wanted to know. Langan leaned down and whispered in his ear, telling him not to be stupid. It was a good deal for all the evidence they had and he should take it. He stared her down for a while longer just to be sure she wouldn't give. He eventually picked up the pen and wrote down the address to the space he'd used to take his victims.

"It's all there" he said. His voice was soft and weak. He knew it was over for him. He had nothing left. Chris stood up from her chair and picked up the legal pad.

"Nice doing business with you" she said sarcastically before walking out the door back into the captain's office. She showed the Captain what he'd written and he told them to go and check it out. Barba agreed not to finalize the deal until they were sure he'd told them the truth. The address he's given them was to a house that wasn't far from where he'd dumped the bodies in Hell's Kitchen. He'd used the basement to hold his victims and carry out his torture. The walls were thick enough for him to have held the women there for days, even weeks, without anyone hearing their screams. There was dried blood still on the floor and a hose in the corner. They figured the hose was used to clean up after he dumped the bodies. The blood still there must've belonged to his last victims, Hallie and Kaitlyn. CSU started working on collecting samples to take to the lab while they searched the rest of the house. One of the upstairs rooms was used as his viewing center. There were ten monitors in all and the wall behind his computer set up was covered with surveillance photos of all his victims as well as Chris and Amanda. He'd put all their photos in the center of the other collages. They were his focal point. He had more pictures of them than any of the other couples plastered to the wall. There were pictures of them out with Frannie and stills of them around the apartment: in the kitchen, living room, bedroom, shower. The pictures of them in the park at their picnic with Olivia, Fin, Nick and the kids were the best. They looked so happy together. Chris saw a stand with a jewelry box sitting on top of it across the room. She went over and opened it, revealing three sets of wedding bands. She grabbed the box and bagged it then went over to help take down all the photos to be added to evidence.

Once they had everything they needed, they headed back to the precinct. Barba finalized the deal with Rankins and his lawyer. All that was left was filing paperwork and getting a court date for a sentencing hearing. The Chief of D's stopped by the precinct while they were getting their paperwork done. He spent a few minutes in the captain's office before coming out to address the squad.

"I just want to say that I appreciate all of your hard work on this case" he said to all of them. "I understand that it wasn't always comfortable or easy but you all did one hell of a job". He turned and looked at Chris and saw the bandage on her neck. "I trust you're going to be ok?" he asked.

"Yeah. I'll be fine" she said. It was clear from her tone of voice that she still wasn't a fan of his. He ignored the defiance in her tone and again congratulated them on a job well done before making his way out of the precinct. It was nearing two in the morning and they were all tired. Cragen told them to finish up their paperwork, leave it on his desk, and then take the day off. They sat back down at their desks and worked quickly, all wanting to finish and go home to get some shut eye. Fin finished first and headed out. Then Olivia, followed by Amanda, Nick, and finally Christina. Even though Amanda was finished, she stayed and waited for Chris to finish so that they could leave together. Chris didn't get that memo because when she finished, she just grabbed her jacket and bag and headed for the elevator. Amanda grabbed her jacket and followed her out of the squad room. They rode down and walked out of the precinct together.


	19. Chapter 19: Slowing Down

Chapter 19: Slowing Down

The drive back to the apartment was completely silent. Chris was debating in her head whether she wanted to drop Amanda off then go home or get some sleep and move all of her stuff back home later that day. She decided to go to the apartment and get some sleep first. She didn't care when narcotics wanted the apartment back. She planned to use her day off to move out of the pad and back home with her family. When they got back to the apartment, Amanda took Frannie out since she'd been cooped up for a while. Chris changed her clothes and threw her ruined she in the trash. Amanda came back in the apartment, got Frannie fresh food and water then came into the bedroom to get ready for bed. Chris sat down on the bed and took her hair down then got under the covers. She turned off her bedside lamp and laid down to go to sleep. Amanda came out of the bathroom and saw that Chris was already in bed. She'd wanted to talk to her about the interrogation and why she was so upset. Then she thought it would be better if they talked about it after they'd gotten a good night's rest and were both thinking clearly. She turned off the lamp on her side of the bed and laid down next to Christina to go to sleep.

Light streaming through the bedroom window woke Chris at eight forty. She got up and went over to close the curtains then climbed back into bed and laid down to go back to sleep. Amanda woke up when felt the bed shift when Chris got up and then shift again when she laid back down. Without any thought, she moved over to cuddle with her only to feel her shrug her off. She thought maybe Chris just trying to get into a comfortable position so she tried again to put her arm around her and lay her head on her back. Again Chris shrugged her off and this time Amanda could feel that it was intentional. It took her a moment but she remembered that she was still angry with her for ignoring her the day before. She moved back to her side of the bed and went back to sleep. They were both woken up again at a few minutes past eleven by Frannie who was sitting next to the bed barking. Amanda got up went to see what her fuss was about. Her water bowl was empty so she filled it for her and then went back to the bedroom. Chris came out the bathroom as she walked back into the bedroom. She walked past her over to the closet without saying a word to Amanda.

"You wanna go out for breakfast?" she asked seeing she was going to have to get them talking again. Chris turned around and looked at her.

"Are you over yourself now?" she asked. Amanda rolled her eyes.

"You act like I had no reason to be angry" she said annoyed by Chris' indifference to her feelings.

"I didn't realize you did. Amanda, you know I didn't mean anything I said in there about you".

"No, I don't know" she said sounding more than a little upset. "You talked about me like I wasn't important to you. "You think you'll keep me" like I'm some gadget that you tried out and decided you liked. And to think you were worried about me using you as an experiment".

"Amanda, I didn't mean that. Come on, don't act like you've never said anything in an interrogation that you didn't mean to get a response from a suspect".

"Yes, I have but this is different" she said angrily. "You made it personal".

"Of course it's personal!" she yelled. "You don't get it. You don't know what it's like….to be told your whole life that you're a mistake. That something's wrong with you or that you're sick. Or that the God that you've been raised to believe in, that supposedly created you in his image, that's supposed to love you no matter what, got it wrong…got you wrong". Chris hated explaining her feelings but she'd promised Amanda before that she'd be more open with her. "My own mother would agree with some of the things he said in there" she said sadly. "So yeah, it's personal. And I said whatever I had to get control and keep it and take him down and I won't apologize for that". Amanda thought again about how much Chris must've have identified with them victims. Suddenly her being upset about Chris making this personal for her seemed silly. She walked over to Christina and took her hands.

"I'm sorry" she said, "I was….only thinking about myself. You're right. You shouldn't apologize". Christina was rethinking her decision to agree to continue dating Amanda. It was only their first argument and she was already over this whole relationship thing. This is one of the reasons she didn't date. If she didn't date then there were no arguments, no feelings that she had to deal with, and no need to explain herself. But still, she didn't want to leave Amanda. She never knew someone could make her feel so conflicted.

"Let's not fight anymore, ok?" she asked gently squeezing Amanda's hands. Amanda nodded her head.

"Ok" she said in agreement before they kissed and made up. "So….you wanna go out for breakfast?" she asked again.

"Yeah, let's go to breakfast" she said. She glanced over at the clock on the night stand and saw it was nearing eleven forty. "Brunch" she corrected herself. They got dressed and decided to walk instead of drive and take Frannie with them. They had a nice brunch where they talked, not argued, talked more about the things Chris had said in the interrogation room with Rankins. Amanda started to understand more why Chris needed to say the things she said to him. The more she understood, the less hurt her feelings were. When they got back to the apartment, they got a call from Fin letting them know that Narcotics didn't need the apartment cleared out of until the end of the week, so they could take their time moving out. He told them to let him know when they were ready to move furniture out and he and Nick would be over to help out. They decided they might as well just move it now. They packed up all the clothes and food and all of Frannie's stuff and loaded it in the car. Fin and Nick showed up just in time and helped them load Amanda's bedroom furniture on her truck. They made the drive over to Amanda's apartment and moved her furniture in. They gave Fin the keys to the pad and he and Nick left to go enjoy the rest of their day off. Chris helped Amanda carry her bags up and put Frannie's food, bowl, and bed in their places. She put all the food in the frig and then helped Amanda finish unpacking her clothes. Amanda noticed that Chris hadn't brought any of her stuff up so she offered to help her.

"Ummm, I'm moving back home" Chris said, "I thought….you knew that".

"No, I didn't know that" Amanda said. Chris could hear in her voice that she was upset that she wasn't staying. "How would I know that? You didn't talk to me about it". Chris shrugged her shoulders.

"I just assumed that you knew I'd be going back home".

"I didn't know you didn't want to stay with me" she said putting her last few t shirts away in her drawer. She put her suitcases in the closet and then went out to the living room. Chris hoped that this didn't turn into another argument. She took a breath and followed her out to the living room.

"Amanda" she said starting to explain.

"No, it's fine" she said stopping her. "You don't have to stay here if you don't want to. Frannie and I will be fine".

"It's not that I don't want to" she said sitting down next to her. "I'm just….not into the whole U-Haul thing". Amanda looked at her confused.

"What are you talking about?"

"You know like the joke" she said. Amanda still had no idea what she was talking about. "It doesn't matter. I just…it's a little soon for us to be seriously living together, don't you think?" she asked.

"We've already been living together. I thought things were going well with us". She didn't understand why Chris was ready to just bail.

"Things are going well but, come on Amanda. If we're both being honest, we wouldn't be living together if it weren't for the case" she said. "We probably wouldn't be together at all if it weren't for the case" she added. Right away she felt she probably should've kept that thought to herself. "I didn't mean it like that. I'm just saying that the case really sped things along for us, that's all" she said clarifying her statement.

"What's your point?" Amanda asked.

"My point is that maybe we should slow down. Let's date for a while, really date, before we take the step of living together. And…I really need to be home anyway. My mom is still sick and my sister is still acting out. My dad, he can't take care of both of them by himself. My family really needs me right now". She knew that if Amanda would understand anything, it would be that she needed to be there for her family. "Look, it's not like I'm breaking up with you. I just need to be at home". Amanda knew that Chris was right. If it weren't for the case they might not have gotten together so quickly but they most definitely wouldn't have been living together so soon. She couldn't argue that it might be a good idea for them to slow down. And she definitely couldn't argue with her about needing to help take care of her mom and sister.

"Fine" she finally said after thinking about everything that Christina said. "Frannie's gonna miss you".

"Only Frannie?" she asked with a smirk.

"I might too….just a little". Chris laughed and leaned over, pressing her lips against Amanda's.

"Why don't you come over for dinner tonight?" she asked once their kiss ended.

"Oh yeah. So your mother can give me death glances?" Chris laughed again.

"Well she might but something tells me you can more handle yourself" she said kissing her again. "And if you can't, I'll protect you". She kissed her again, this time pushing her back to lay down on the couch. She settled herself between Amanda's legs as she kissed down her neck and unbuttoned her shirt. Just as she was about to move her bra Frannie started to bark at them. Amanda laughed and Chris shook her head from side to side. "Such a jealous bitch" she said under her breath. Amanda playfully slapped her on the shoulder and she moved to get off of her so Frannie would stop barking. She kissed her one more time and then left to head home and see her family. Amanda looked at Frannie who looked back at her with her big, brown puppy dog eyes.

"You need to learn to share" she said. Frannie whined then went over and laid in her bed. Amanda filled her food and water bowl then went to take a shower and change clothes, deciding she'd go to an afternoon meeting. Being in a relationship with someone as closed off as Christina was really stressful and the pressure of making the case didn't help. But being with Chris also made her want to work her program and keep herself on the straight and narrow. She really wanted things to work out between them and Christina had made it very clear that she wouldn't stay with her if she continued gambling. Her time in narcotics showed her how addiction ruined people's lives and she refused to be a part of that. So she was doing this for Chris. More than that she was doing this for herself. She was tired of being in debt, always looking over her shoulder, ruining good relationships, and worrying about her keeping her job. She deserved a good, happy life and gambling had no part in that. She grabbed a jacket, her phone and her keys and headed out the door.


	20. Chapter 20: Welcome Home

**Hey y'all. Sorry for such a long time between updates. I've been a little busy lately. I'm gonna try to starting updating at least once a week. Hopefully my schedule allows me more time for writing. Here's more for you. As always, leave your comments. They're much appreciated. Hope you enjoy!**

Chapter 20: Welcome Home

Christina arrived home just in time for Jeza to get home from school and Robbie to get home from work. Her father had been taking time off time to take care of her mother but he decided he'd be going back the next day. He didn't want to use all of his sick days at once. Gloria was happy to see that her daughter was home but she fussed for a while about the small gash in her neck.

"No sea nada, mami" she said trying to calm her down.

"Podrias haber sido asesinada" she said. She hated the job her daughter did. She didn't understand why she couldn't be an accountant or a teacher. Something that didn't involve her risking her life every day.

"But I wasn't" she said simply. "Stop worrying. It's not good for you. I'm gonna go unpack". She grabbed her bags and went upstairs to her room. It didn't take her long to put all of her stuff away and settle in. it felt so good to be home, to be in her own space. She sat on her bed and thought about her relationship with Amanda, how it was going and how she wanted it to continue. Her phone started to ring in her pocket and she took it and looked at the caller id. It was Beth. She debated whether or not she wanted to answer. By the time she'd made her decision, her phone stopped ringing_. "Probably for the best"_ she thought to herself. She heard her mother yell for her to come downstairs and suddenly regretted her decision to move out of Amanda's place. Then again it's not like she'd get much peace there either. She felt like Amanda was always under her, crowding her space. Sometimes it felt good to be so close to her but other times she felt claustrophobic and she just needed her space. Her mother yelled for her again so she got up from her bed with a heavy sigh and went back downstairs. "Yes, mami" she answered standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"Come sit" she said patting the couch cushion next to her. "We need to talk. Es importante". Chris stepped off the stairs and walked into the living room.

"¿Qué es?" she asked sitting next to her mother on the couch.

"Quiero que vengas a misa conmigo esta noche. I talked to Father Preston and he's willing to talk to you" she said sincerely.

"Mami" she said annoyed, "I'm not going to mass and I'm not talking to Father Preston".

"But it's important, mija. How long it has it been since you've been to confession?" she asked.

"Gloria, leave the girl alone" her father said from the dining room table. "She doesn't have anything to confess. She hasn't done anything wrong".

"Hush Roberto" she said sternly, "Let her decide".

"She already did. You're just refusing to listen" he said back. She gave him a hard glare before turning back to her daughter.

"Listen mija, it's been a long time since we went to mass together as a family. Demasiado tiempo. It'll be good for us".

"I don't wanna go to church mami" she said declining her offer again. "Anyway, I invited Amanda over for dinner tonight?" Gloria scrunched her nose at her.

"Amanda? Quien es Amanda?" she asked. Chris knew she hadn't forgotten who Amanda was. She was just trying to be difficult as always.

"Mami" she said impatiently, letting her know she wasn't fooled by her acting ignorant. Gloria looked displeased with her but it was a look that she'd gotten used to over the years.

"Christina, venir aqui" her father called for her. He pulled out a chair for her to sit down next to him at the dining room table. "Look all these over for me" he said pushing a bunch of bills and a notebook in front of her. "Make sure I haven't made any mistakes". He'd added up all their bills for the house and the cars plus bills for her mother's most recent stay in the hospital and calculated the most they could pay a month to pay off the debt in the least amount of time. Jeza sat at the table across from her doing her homework. It surprised her that she'd come right in from school and sat down to do it without a fuss. She wondered how long this good behavior would last.

"Yeah, papa. It looks good" she said giving him back all the papers. "I'll try to get extra shifts when I can, you know, to speed things along". They'd been having problems since her first undercover stint. The medical bills piled up, they'd gotten behind on the mortgage, and barely kept up with their car payments, not to mention all the money Chris forked over to drug dealers to keep Jeza out of trouble. Her salary as a detective and her father and brother's salaries as freelance construction workers wasn't exactly bringing the big bucks. And Roberto Sr. hadn't been able to work for almost seven months after his heart attack. Needless to say, they were really struggling. When Jeza's problem got so out of hand that she couldn't keep them under wraps anymore, Chris made the executive decision that they move to New York. She was paying the majority of the bills and basically raising Jezalyn herself by that point so her parents didn't put up any arguments. She hoped that they'd get their money situation under control quickly and that Jeza kept out of trouble so she didn't have to stress so much anymore. She got up from the table and started to go to the kitchen to decide what they were going to have for dinner.

"Chris" Jeza said stopping her from leaving the dining room. "Can I have my phone back now?" she asked.

"No" she said, "You're still grounded".

"What?" she asked in disbelief. "That's not fair. I've been going to school and doing my homework. I've come right home every day like you said" she whined.

"Good" she said simply, "That's what you're supposed to do. You shouldn't need an incentive. You're grounded until I say otherwise and that means no phone". Jeza groaned and pouted in frustration. She didn't know how much longer she'd be able to put up with this punishment but she didn't want to find out what Chris had up her sleeve if she continued to act out. Christina ignored her sister's grumbling and continued into the kitchen to get dinner started.

"Listen to your sister Esme" Robbie Sr. said looking across the table to his youngest child. "She wants what's best for you. The sooner you figure that out, the better off you'll be". Jeza pretended not to pay him any attention and continued doing her homework. Chris looked in the refrigerator and tried to decide on what they should have for dinner. She heard her phone ringing and reached for it in her back pocket only to find that it wasn't there. She heard her mother call for her to come answer her phone and figured it must've come out of her pocket while she was sitting down to talk with her mother. She told her to go ahead and answer for her and continued to skim over the food in their frig.

"Come here mija" Gloria yelled, calling for Chris from the living room. Chris closed the frig and went back to the living room. She walked in expecting to take her phone from her mother but she'd already hung up with whoever called.

"Honey that was Nicholas. I've invited him and your friends over for dinner so I want you and Esme…"

"Mami" she whined, "Why did you do that?" she asked annoyed.

"They're your friends and they protect you. I want to meet them and thank them for keeping you safe. No discutas mija. I've already invited them". Chris groaned and rolled her eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was cook a big dinner for all of her colleagues. She was definitely wishing she'd stayed at Amanda's now. "So I want you and Esme to prepare all of the good foods. Como hogar en Colombia". Chris stood there and stared at her mother, clearly displeased. "Go, Christina. They'll be here at seven". She groaned again and turned to head back into the kitchen. Jeza sat the table doing her homework as if she hadn't heard her mother say she wanted her to help her sister with dinner.

"Jezalyn Esmeralda" Gloria said getting her younger daughter's attention, "Go help your sister with dinner".

"I'm not done with my homework" she said clearing annoyed. She didn't want to have a big dinner either. Chris came back into the living room.

"It's fine. Let her finish. I'll start without her" she said grabbing her phone from sitting on the couch next to her mother. She went back to the kitchen and started to take out the food she'd be cooking for dinner. She'd been home to Colombia three times in her life. Once when she was five for her grandmother's funeral, again when she was twelve for her grandfather's funeral and a third time when she was fifteen for her Quinceanera. She knew traditional Colombian cuisine like the back of her hand. The only thing she wouldn't cook was the meat. She'd leave that for Jeza to do once she was done with her homework. She dialed Amanda's number but her phone went straight to voicemail. "Hey. Give me a call back when you get this. It's about dinner". She hung up and set the phone on the counter then started taking out all the pots and pans she'd need to make dinner. Once Jeza had finished all her homework, she took her books upstairs and came back down to help Chris with dinner. "Robbie!" Chris yelled for her brother. He came bounding down the stairs and over to the kitchen.

"What?"

"Add the extra section to the table and then put the dishes and place mats out" she instructed.

"You do know that I'm older than you right?" he asked. Chris glared at him from inside the hot kitchen. She was in no mood for his games. Their father came up behind him and slapped him on the back of the head.

"Do what she said Roberto. Stop being difficult" he chastised. Robbie rubbed his head and went to get the extra section of the table they only used for big dinners. Gloria and Robbie Sr. went upstairs to get ready for dinner while their kids finished getting dinner and the house ready. Chris' phone started to ring on the counter and she answered without checking the caller id.

"Hey babe" she said putting the phone between her ear and shoulder so she could continue cooking.

"Hello" she heard from the other end of the phone from a voice that sounded nothing like Amanda. She looked at her phone and saw that it was Beth that had just called. She sighed and mentally kicked herself for not looking before she answered.

"Hey Beth. I'm sorry. I thought you were Amanda calling" she said hiding that she didn't want to talk to her behind a pleasant tone.

"Oh it's ok" she said nicely. "I was calling to see about that dinner that we're supposed to have".

"Oh, right. The dinner. I'll have to talk to Amanda about it. Did you have a specific day in mind?" she asked.

"Well, I was thinking tonight" she suggested.

"Oh we can't tonight. We're having dinner at my parent's house. Maybe we can do it sometime this week".

"Yeah, ok. I haven't started at the gallery yet so I'm sure I'll be free whenever you are".

"Ok. Well my schedule is a little unpredictable but we'll figure something out". She told her she needed to get off the phone and back to finishing up dinner. She said goodbye and quickly hung up the phone. She turned all the knobs on the stove down to the lowest setting so nothing would be overcooked. The doorbell rang and she went over to answer. She opened the door to Amanda standing there with one of the extra cakes Chris baked when they were undercover. "Hey" she said. Strangely for her, she'd missed Amanda in the short time they'd been apart that day.

"Hey" she said stepping into the house. Chris took the cake from her and kissed her on the lips. They parted when they heard Jeza coming down the stairs.

"Better not let mom see you doing that" she said stopping at the bottom of the stairs. Chris ignored her and took Amanda by the hand, leading her into the kitchen to set the cake down on the counter.

"These people are driving me crazy" she said, "It hasn't even been a whole day yet. Did you get my message?"

"Yeah but I was already on my way so…" she trailed off.

"My mother invited everyone to dinner" she informed her.

"Everyone as in…"

"Everyone. Liv and Brian, Nick, Fin, the Captain, even Barba. She invited everyone". The doorbell rang again and Chris let out a long sigh. She let go of Amanda's hand and went to answer the door but Robbie beat her to it. He opened the door to see Nick standing there.

"Who are you?" he asked rudely. She walked up behind him and slapped him on the back of his head like their father always did. "What the…" His hand came up to rub his head and he turned to see that it was Chris who slapped him. He glared at her then turned to go set up tables outside.

"Come on in Nick" she said nicely. He stepped into the house and Chris directed him to the living room. Amanda came from the kitchen and joined him on the couch. Just as Chris was about to close the door, she saw Olivia and Brian walking up to the house. Fin, Cragen and Barba followed not far behind them. She welcomed them inside and they all settled down in the living room. Jeza came back downstairs to see everyone sitting in the living room. She stared for a minute before turning and going outside to the backyard with her brother. "Ignore her. She's….a teenager" Chris said. She went over to the stairs and yelled for her parents to come down.

"Ay Christina, don't yell" her mother said as she came down the stairs. She waited until her father had joined them to make all the introductions so she wouldn't have to do it more than once. "I'm so glad all of you could come" Gloria said with a smile.

"Thank you for inviting us, senora" Nick said. Chris cursed in her head when he called her mother "senora" because she knew what was coming.

"Christina, he's handsome and he speaks Spanish" she whispered to her still loud enough for everyone to hear.

"Ok, why don't we move to the dinner table" she said ignoring her mother's comment.

"Oh, no mija. We're eating outside" Gloria said.

"Por que?" Chris asked obviously not in favor of the idea.

"Because there's not enough room for everyone in here".

"Yes, there is. There's plenty of room".

"No, there isn't. I invited more of your friends" she said nonchalantly.

"Mami, I don't have any other friends". Robbie Sr. just stood there quietly, deciding to let his wife and daughter hash this out themselves.

"Of course you do. Laura, Alexis, Helena, Ricardo" she said starting to name off people she'd invited.

"Oh my god mother". Chris was so annoyed she didn't know what to do with herself.

"It'll be fun. It's a celebration, mija. Tu regreso seguro a casa" she said happily. She didn't wait for Chris to say anything else. She knew all she would hear were her objections to the party. She went out through the kitchen to the backyard where Robbie and Jeza were setting up tables and chairs. Chris' father kissed her on the head and told her to relax before going to join his wife and two other children outside.

"Just…kill me now" she said getting a laugh from her coworkers. The doorbell rang again and she opened it to see some of the people she'd met in her short time in New York. They all filed in and did their own introductions with the guests already in the living room and Chris directed them all to the backyard. Amanda stuck around in the house to help Chris however she could. The bell rang yet again and Chris wondered just how many people her mother had invited. They hadn't been in New York long enough for her to have met that many people. She opened the door and it was some friends of her brother's from work. Ricardo, in particular, had a crush on Chris and wasn't shy about showing it. She was sure that was why her mother had invited him. He was a nice guy from what Chris could tell but she wasn't interested in men and he was well aware of that. He didn't seem to care though because he never stopped trying to convince her to go on a date with him.

She was polite to everyone and directed them to the backyard. Ricky tried to hang out in the house to talk to her but Robbie came inside and told him to get away from his sister. Even though they were pretty good friends, Robbie shut down any flirting he saw going on with his sisters in his presence. They'd set up all the food outside and Jeza brought her radio down from her room so they could have music. Chris went into the house to get the cake Amanda brought when the bell rang yet again. She groaned and went to open the door to find someone she'd least expected on the other side.

"Ryanne" she said surprised, "What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Your mother invited me" she said. Chris looked at her confused.

"How do you know my mother?"

"I don't but she called me and said there was a party for you and that I should come. So here I am". Chris didn't know how her mother had gotten Ryanne's number but she was the last person she would've wanted her to invite. "Aren't you gonna invite me in?" she asked. Chris sighed and stepped out of the way for Ryanne to walk in past her. She shut the door, went back to the kitchen to get the cake then led her out to the backyard. She put the cake on the table with all the other food when she noticed that Ryanne was still next to her.

"Feel free to mingle" she said trying to be polite. She started to walk over to where Amanda was sitting but Ry grabbed her arm to stop her.

"I was hoping I could mingle with you" she said in a flirtatious tone.

"Ryanne, we've talked about this" Chris said pulling out of her grip.

"I know you said you don't wanna date and I've accepted that. So I'll settle for a hook up every now and then".

"No Ryanne" she said firmly. "What happened between us, maybe before could've been a regular thing but not now".

"Why?"

"Because…I'm with someone now" she said folding her arms over her chest.

"I thought you said you didn't want to date anyone?" she asked angrily.

"No, I said I didn't want to date you" she corrected. "Listen, this isn't up for discussion. I'm with someone and that's it. And even if I weren't with anyone, I still wouldn't want to date you, Ryanne" she said honestly.

"Why not?"

"Because….I slept with you one time and you became this jealous stalker. I'm not interested in finding out what you're like in a relationship" she said bluntly. She wasn't trying to be rude but Ryanne didn't seem to get things unless they were stated to her clearly.

"Fine" she said noticeably displeased with her opinion. "You know you're kind of a bitch". Chris nodded her head.

"Yeah. I do". She turned and walked over to Amanda and everyone else she worked with. They'd picked a table in the middle and had already gotten their food and started eating. She sat down next to her girlfriend who had a look of curiosity on her face. "What?" Chris asked, seeing how Amanda was looking at her.

"You invited her?" she asked with a hint of jealousy.

"No. My mother did" she said annoyed.

"Why?" Chris reached over and stole a piece of one of her empanadas and shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't know. I don't why she invited any of these people". Gloria came over to them and sat a plate in front of Chris.

"You need to eat, mija" she said.

"There's chicken on this plate" she said looking up at her mother. Gloria nodded her head. "You know I don't eat chicken". Robbie came over to the table and sat down across from Chris.

"I'll take it" he said pulling the plate across the table in front of him. He quickly picked up the fork and started eating.

"That was for your sister" Gloria said chastising him.

"She didn't want it" he said taking a pause from stuffing his face.

"I can get my own food ma".

"Fine" Gloria said giving up on trying to take care of her daughter. "Why don't you go talk to Ricky? He's been staring at you since he got here".

"No, mom" Chris said firmly. "Stop trying to fix me up".

"I already talked to him about that staring" Robbie said, "I'm gonna punch him in the face". Chris laughed but Gloria didn't think it was funny.

"Usted hara tal cosa no" Gloria said seriously. She turned back to her daughter, "Don't dismiss him, Christina. He's very nice. He has a good job y es muy guapo".

"He better stay away from her" Robbie said, obviously opposed to the idea of him with his sister.

"Oh, hush Roberto" Gloria said waving him off. She went over to sit next to her husband to eat.

"And you" Robbie said pointing at Amanda, "you better watch yourself" he warned her.

"No" Chris said, "You better watch _yourself" _she warned him. Chris told Robbie time and time again that she wasn't at all interested in any of friends but if she ever were, he would have no say in who she dated. He never seemed to get the memo and continued to stick his nose in her business. She was perfectly capable of saying no to someone she wasn't interested in but he always took the initiative and did it for her. Now that she was with Amanda, she didn't want him being the overbearing, overprotective big brother she knew him to be. He always tried to intimidate anyone he thought was interested in his sisters into being disinterested. Even though she wasn't worried about it working with Amanda, she didn't want him trying.

Olivia saw how cozy the two of them seemed together and knew they'd need to have a talk with the captain about their relationship. She knew all too well how wrong things could go on the streets if the detectives working together were too emotionally involved. It would be the Captain's call but Olivia would definitely be giving her opinion on the matter. They ate and small talked and enjoyed the Colombian music coming from Jezalyn's stereo. Chris was less annoyed that her mother had decided to have this party now that it was happening and she was enjoying herself. The back door opened and a tall, handsome, dark haired man with caramel colored skin stepped into the backyard. Gloria and Robbie Sr. greeted him with smiles on their faces. Even Chris' brother and sister seemed happy to see him. Chris looked over and her face immediately lit up when she saw who it was. She got up from her chair and walked over to him.

"¿qué pasa?" she asked happily. She stood in front of him with her weight to one side and her hands in her back pockets.

"Nada nuevo" he said mirroring her form. Each of them was waiting for the other to break. Chris knew he would be the one to do it. He always was. "Déme cierto amor mamacita" he said pulling his hands out his pockets and opening his arms to her. She walked into his embrace and wrapped her arms around him. They held on to each other for a moment, taking in each other's familiar scents, before pulling away.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she asked.

"I heard you were undercover again. Had to come out and check on you". He brought his hand up to turn her head and look at the bandage on her neck.

"It's just a small cut. I'm fine" she said pushing his hand away.

"Yeah well if I'd been here to have your back you wouldn't even have that".

"Usted no sabes que". He nodded his head.

"Yeah I do" he said confidently. "Who are these incompetents they have watching your back anyway. They here?"

"Franco, behave yourself" she warned him. He took her face in her hands and looked her in the eyes.

"You look good, kid". He let go of her face and put his arm around her shoulder. She put her arm around his waist and they walked together to an empty table. "So, how's this place treating you?" he asked.

"Oh, you know. Same as any other place" she said. He let his arm down from her shoulder and sat down at the table. She pulled out a chair and sat down across from him. "This house is nice. Nicer than what we had in Cali".

"Good" he said nodding his head. "And your mom? I heard she spent some time in the hospital recently".

"Really? You heard from who exactly?" she asked curiously. He always seemed to know what was going on with her.

"I have sources" he said as vague as always.

"She's good. She's getting better every day".

"And your sister? She still causing you trouble?" he asked.

"Yeah. You know Jeza. She's all about challenging authority every chance she gets".

"Sounds like someone else I know" he said looking her right in the eyes.

Amanda looked over her shoulder and saw them sitting at a table away from everyone. She didn't know who he was but he seemed to be a good friend to Chris' family and to Chris. She knew it shouldn't bother her with Christina being a lesbian and all but it did. She hadn't even introduced him to her. She turned back around and focused on the conversation happening at her own table. Meanwhile, Chris was dealing with her own conversation which was taking a turn that was all too familiar to her.

"You seeing anyone new?" he asked. Chris sighed and looked down at the table. She and Franco had a complicated relationship. Sometimes he felt like her big brother and other times he felt like her husband. He was the only man she could ever see herself with.

"Maybe" she said piquing his curiosity.

"Is that a "yeah but I don't wanna tell you" maybe or a "you know, a few people" maybe?" Chris had always told him that she didn't do relationships. He always told her she just hadn't met the right person to do a relationship with.

"Yeah, I'm seeing someone" she said. He nodded his head and looked around the backyard.

"So who is the lucky lady?" he asked. He tried to guess just by looking at the women around them but Chris had been with so many different women in the time he'd known her that his guess wouldn't have been based on anything.

"Her name's Amanda. She's the blonde I was sitting to when you came out".

"Supongo no noté nadie…excepto usted" he said in his smooth Puerto Rican accent. He was very charming and he had a way with the ladies. He didn't have any problems getting whatever girl he wanted until he met Christina. He smooth talked his way into the bed of almost every rookie that came into their precinct. All the guys joked that he'd finally met his match, and he had. Chris was him in every way apart from her being a woman. She had a way with the ladies as well and hadn't met one yet that she wanted and didn't get.

"Stop it" she said knowing what he was trying to do.

"Stop what?" he asked, playing innocent. She gave him a knowing look. "Alright, fine. So can I meet her?" he asked. Chris looked at him suspiciously, wondering what he had up his sleeve. "No agenda. I promise". Chris got up and walked over to the table with all of her colleagues and her girlfriend. Franco followed close behind her.

"Hey guys" she said getting everyone's attention, "This is Franco Alvarez. He was my handler when was undercover in Cali". She went down the line introducing everyone, saving Amanda for last. He looked her over and decided she was attractive. Her accent wasn't bad either. Chris saw the way he was looking at her and punched him in the arm. Her mother called for her to come inside the house so she excused herself to go see what she wanted. Once she'd gone inside, Franco took her seat at the table and engaged in conversation with her colleagues. He focused mostly on Amanda, though, trying to assess how serious things were between her and Christina. Amanda thought he was nice and funny. If he was a friend of Christina's then she wanted to try to get to know him better. She sensed that he was trying to flirt with her and she was trying to make it clear that their interaction was nothing more than friendly. She wasn't sure that he was getting the message. Fin noticed that Franco was getting a little too comfortable with Amanda. When Franco got up from the table to go get a drink, Fin took the opportunity to go over and talk to him. He started with small talk about how it was working with Chris and how their undercover op had gone before sliding into talking about her and Amanda.

"Did she tell you that they're together?" he asked.

"Uhh, yeah. Yeah, she told me" he said getting the feeling that he was about hear something he didn't like.

"Ok, cool. I was just making sure, you know. Wouldn't want anybody to get the wrong idea about you". Fin was hoping that things wouldn't have to get ugly for him to get his point across but he'd do what he had to do to protect his partner and friend.

"What idea would that be?" he asked.

"That you're a player trying to one-up your friend by trying to steal her girlfriend" he said without missing a beat.

"Nah, definitely wouldn't want anyone thinking that" he said taking a sip of the beer he'd just opened. Fin shook his head and went back over to the table with everyone else.

The evening went on with more talking, laughter and music. Their guests started to say their goodbyes at around nine thirty in the evening. By eleven, the only people still at the house were Amanda, Fin, Nick, Olivia and Brian. They'd helped clean up everything outside and moved inside to lounge in the living room. Chris' parents and her sister had gone to bed and her brother had gone out for drinks with his friends. They decided it was time to call it a night. They all had to get to work bright and early the next day. When Chris walked them outside, Fin pulled her to the side to have a chat with her.

"How close are you to that Franco guy?" he asked. She shrugged her shoulders.

"We're…pretty good friends" she said. "He's my best friend, actually". They stopped next to his car and she folded her arms over her chest. "Why do you ask?"

"He was kinda, you know…trying to put the moves on Amanda when you weren't around". Chris laughed at the thought of Franco doing his stupid competition thing with her again.

"That's just Franco. He's really nothing I'm worried about" she said shrugging it off. "But thanks for lookin' out for us".

"No problem". He opened the door and got in his car. Chris walked back over to Amanda to escort her to her truck.

"What was that about?"

"Oh, he was just….checking in" she said, opening the driver side door for her. Amanda climbed into the driver seat and Chris closed the door for her. Amanda started her truck and let down her window.

"So, I'll see you in the morning?" she asked. She wanted to ask Chris to come spend the night with her but they'd talked about slowing things down. She figured she should let her get a few nights of sleep in her own bed before asking her back to her apartment again.

"Yes, you will". She leaned into the window and kissed her on the lips. "Drive safe. Say hi to Frannie for me". She kissed her again then walked around the truck to stand on the sidewalk. She waited for Amanda's truck to disappear around the corner before going into her house and locking the door. She went upstairs to the bathroom to shower, brush her teeth and wash her face then went to her bedroom and got dressed for bed. She put her phone on the bedside table then got under her covers and settled down to sleep. Just as she was drifting off, her phone chimed on the table beside her. She reached over and unlocked it to see a text from Franco. It read: _So the "girlfriend". What's your bet?_ She rolled her eyes and put the phone back on the table then turned over and went to sleep.

**Spanish-English Translation**

**No sea nada, mami**- It's nothing, mommy

**Podrias haber sido asesinada**- You could've been killed

**Es Importante**- It's important

**Que es?**- What is?

**Quiero que vengas a misa conmigo esta noche** - I want you to come to church with me tonight.

**Demasiado tiempo**- Too long

**Quien es Amanda**- Who is Amanda?

**Venir aqui**- come here

**No discutas**- Don't argue

**Como hogar en Colombia**- Like home in Colombia

**Tu regreso seguro a casa**- Your safe return home

**Usted hara tal cosa no**- You will do no such thing

**Y es muy guapo**- and is very handsome

**Que pasa- **What's up?

**Nada Nuevo- **Nothing new

**Déme cierto amor mamacita-**Give me some love mami

**Usted no sabes que- **You don't know that

**Supongo no noté nadie…excepto usted- **I guess I didn't notice anyone...except you.


	21. Chapter 21: Keep It Professional

Chapter 21: Keep It Professional

The next few days went by quickly. The squad got a case of a woman raped late at night on a subway platform. They got a pretty good sketch from the victim and put it out on the news. Three more women came forward, giving almost the exact same stories of how they were attacked. A man came in claiming to know the man on the sketch they'd put out. He worked on the janitorial staff at his clinic. All of the victims, it turned out, had gone there at one time or another. They picked him up and brought him in for questioning. All four women picked him out of a lineup and he had no alibi for the time of the rapes. He folded almost immediately, giving a full confession. They took his prints and sent him down to central booking, got their paperwork in and then headed home.

Chris went in to work the next morning working on her second cup of coffee. She'd gotten her brother up for work, her sister off to school, and made sure her mother's meds were ready for her before leaving her house. Franco was still texting her to talk shit about Amanda and how he was gonna take her off her hands. She ignored him and sat down at her desk to start on her paperwork. Amanda wondered if Chris was upset with her about something because she hadn't said hi to her when she came in. When Chris got up from her desk to go get coffee, Amanda went over to talk to her.

"Hey" she said getting a Styrofoam cup and pouring herself some coffee even though she didn't really want any.

"Hey" Chris said back. She put her usual ridiculous amount of sugar in the bottom of her cup before pouring her coffee.

"What's up?"

"Nothing".

"Are you having a bad morning or something?" Amanda asked stirring her coffee. Chris shook her head.

"No. My morning was fine" she said.

"It's just…you didn't say hi or good morning when you came in" she said sounding like her feelings were hurt. "Not just to me, to anyone. I just thought maybe you had a bad start to your day". Chris smiled and shook her head again.

"No. The start to my day was fine".

"You're not having second thoughts about dinner tonight, are you?" she asked. They'd finally been able to make dinner plans with Beth. Amanda was a little nervous but mostly interested in what she'd learn, both about Beth and Christina.

"No, I'm not. I'm fine, really". Honestly, she was annoyed when she came in because of the texts she'd gotten from Franco. She used to think that playing that game with him was fun but she'd since grown up. She was over that now. She thought it was time for him to grow up too. "I'm sorry that I didn't speak when I came in. That was rude of me". Amanda knew she was being sarcastic with her but she let it slide. They both took their coffee back to their desks and got back to their paperwork. It was slow day so far and they were fixing to break for lunch soon. Amanda was sitting at the briefing table waiting for Olivia and Nick to come back from checking out a domestic when Chris came over and sat on the table next to her chair. "What are you thinking about?" she asked, seeing she was deep in thought.

"Trying to decide where we should go for lunch" she answered. "Liv and Nick said it was up to me".

"I'm sorry for…being snide with you earlier. I was annoyed and I took it out on you" she said sincerely.

"Apology accepted" she said. Chris looked to see if anyone was around before leaning down and giving Amanda a kiss. When they heard someone clear their throat from behind them, they quickly parted and looked over to see Captain Cragen giving them a discerning eye.

"Sorry" Chris said, hoping they wouldn't be in any trouble. Olivia and Nick walked back into the squad room, saying that the complaint they got was a bust and asking if they'd decided where they were going for lunch. Amanda nodded. Fin joined them as they prepared to head out.

"Uh, hold up a minute guys" Cragen said stopping them from leaving. "Rollins, Reyes…can I see you two in my office a minute?" he asked even though it wasn't really a request. Amanda got up from her chair and Chris got down from the table and they both followed him into his office. Olivia, Nick and Fin shared glances, each of them wondering how serious the conversation they were about to have was going to be. "Shut the door". Chris pushed the door closed and then stood next to Amanda. Before he could say anything, she spoke up for the both of them.

"Captain, I apologize for….that" she said. "It was completely inappropriate and it won't happen again".

"Never happen again" Amanda said in agreement.

"Relax, you two. This isn't the principal's office. You're not in trouble" he said taking a seat at his desk. They both looked at each other and let out sigh of relief. He gestured for them to have a seat so they walked around and sat in the chairs in front of his desk. "Now, I understand that you both have decided to continue your relationship on more" he paused trying to think of the right word to use, "authentic terms. Is that true?" he asked. They looked at each other again then turned back to him, nodding in unison. They knew this conversation would come but it didn't make them any less worried. "Ok. You both know you can't be partnered together on cases anymore. As long as you can keep it professional, then we'll have nothing to talk about".

"We will be…wholly professional, Captain" Amanda assured him. He nodded then look to Chris to make sure she was on board with that.

"Oh yeah" she said when she realized he was waiting on her confirmation. "Wholly professional" she said using Amanda's words.

"Good" he said sounding satisfied with their agreement. "Now, if this becomes an issue here at work, we'll have to revisit this and make some changes".

"It won't be a problem, Captain" Amanda said confidently.

"Nope, no problems" Chris said acting as a sounding board for Amanda.

"Ok then" he said with a smile on his face. His newest detective never ceased to amuse him. He told them they were free to go. They offered to bring him something back for lunch but he declined. They left his office and went to lunch with their colleagues. The rest of the day went by fairly quickly for it being such a slow one. They didn't have much time left before they'd be able to check out and go home. Franco had been texting and calling Chris all day but she'd been ignoring him. He was supposed to be in town for the rest of the week. She used to put up with his shenanigans, even participate, but when she went undercover all of that changed. She had grow up and get serious about what she was doing or she'd get herself killed. Then when she got home, her parents were sick, her sister was delinquent, and her brother was unemployed. She had to really buckle down and take care of business to keep her family afloat. That meant distancing herself from Franco and some of her other buddies who were known for screwing around, on and off the job. Then came the decision to uproot her family and move across the country. He wasn't happy about it but he had to accept that she had to do what was best for her family.

Franco walked into the squad room and didn't see Chris but he spotted Amanda sitting at her desk. He walked over and leaned on her desk with his hands. She looked up and saw it was him. Fin glared at him and waited for him to say something. He was going to listen carefully to everything he said to Amanda. The second he stepped over the line, he was ready to put him back in his place. Amanda sat quietly and waited patiently for him to say whatever he was thinking.

"Hey there" he finally said.

"Hey" she said back.

"I was looking for Chris but looks like I found my favorite New York detective instead" he said in a flirty tone.

"And here I thought Chris would be your favorite" she said looking back down at her paperwork.

"Ah, I said my favorite New York detective. Christina may be here in New York doing her detective thing but she will _always….." _he paused for emphasis, "be a California girl".

"Well, you know her best" Amanda said sarcastically.

"Yes, I do" he said smugly. "But there's always room for others in her life" he added. "I however have always had a say in Chris'….girlfriends; best friend approval and what not. She's never picked a blonde before".

"Well she did this time" Amanda said getting defensive.

"Right" he said backing off. He heard the change in her voice and knew she was annoyed with him. He needed to get back on the right track with her so he thought he say something to soften the mood. "I'm just saying, it surprised me when she pointed you out as….the one. I care about Chris and I want what's best for her. I want her to be happy. I'd love to give my approval but that would require some time for us to get to know each other". Fin sat back and listened as he tried to smooth talk his way into asking Amanda out. He thought he was an asshole. Here he is claiming to be Chris' best friend while trying to steal her girlfriend. "Chris and I are going out for drinks tonight. You should come with. It'll give us time to chat".

"Drinks, really?" she asked. He nodded. "That's funny because Chris and I are supposed to be going to dinner tonight. She didn't mention anything about going for drinks with you". Fin laughed under his breath at him being caught in a lie. Franco heard it and looked over to see Fin looking him right in the eyes. He decided not to make an issue of it and turned his attention back to Amanda. Chris walked into the squad room and saw Franco at Amanda's desk. She rolled her eyes and walked up behind him.

"It's Chris. All I have to do is ask. She's already said yes" he said confidently.

"I've already said yes to what?" she asked making her presence known to him.

"Ah, mi amada" he said putting an arm around her shoulder. "You, me, Amanda, drinks, tonight".

"Amanda and I already have plans" she said implying a no. He nodded his head.

"Yeah, dinner. She told me. Let's go for a drink before" he suggested.

"Uh" she looked at her watch, "It's already six. Our reservation's for seven thirty".

"After then" he said trying to work around their plans. "Come on, I'm only in town for a few more days. We haven't really had time to catch up. And I haven't really gotten know Amanda." he said giving Amanda a wink.

"Uh, we….won't have time then either" she said giving Amanda a wink of her own.

"Come on, really?" he asked impatiently. "One…two drinks tops".

"No, Franco" she said definitively. "Maybe tomorrow". She shrugged his arm from around her shoulder and walked over to her desk to get her stuff. She shut down her laptop and packed it in her bag then went over to Amanda, who'd gathered her things to leave as well. "Ready?" she asked. Amanda nodded. They said goodbye to everyone as they walked towards the squad room doors to leave.

"I'll call you about that drink" Franco said.

"Ok" Chris said not bothering to turn around. She walked to the elevator with her girlfriend and headed home to get ready for dinner. Fin got up from his desk and stood next to Alvarez with his hands in his pockets.

"I thought she already said yes" he said arrogantly. He laughed and shook his head then walked out of the squad room to the bathroom. Olivia and Nick laughed softly as they both got up from their desks and started packing up to go home.

"What is that guy's problem?" Franco asked.

"I don't know. Maybe it's the fact that you walked in here acting like you own the place" Nick suggested.

"Or the fact that you're trying to mess with his partner's relationship" Olivia said putting her bag on her shoulder. They turned and headed out of the squad room together, leaving Franco standing there all on his lonesome. He let out a huff of air and then headed out himself to find something to get into. He was in New York and the night was young. He was sure he could find something to do.

**Spanish-English Translations**

**Mi amada**- My beloved


	22. Chapter 22: Not Without a Fight

Chapter 22: Not Without a Fight

Chris got dressed at home and packed a bag to take to Amanda's. She hadn't stayed at her apartment since she'd moved back home the week before. She hadn't asked Amanda but she didn't think she would object. She drove over to Amanda's and went upstairs. She still had the key she'd made for her when she moved in so she didn't have to knock. Frannie jumped on her as soon as she walked in the door. She barely let her walk all the way into the apartment. She was close on her heels as walked to the bedroom. It was six forty five and Amanda wasn't even ready. She was standing at her closet looking through her clothes wearing nothing but her underwear.

"Amanda" she said getting her attention.

"Oh good, you're here" she said looking at her over her shoulder.

"Babe" she whined.

"What?" Amanda asked still staring into her closet.

"It's almost seven. Why aren't you dressed yet?" She'd gone home, made sure her mother took her evening pills, started dinner, gotten in the shower, gotten dressed and packed a bag all in thirty minutes. She'd dropped Amanda off at six o'clock. She couldn't believe she wasn't ready yet.

"I can't decide what to wear" she said.

"Oh my god. You're being such a woman right now" Chris said under her breath but still loud enough for Amanda to hear. Amanda turned around and glared at her.

"Just help me" she said annoyed.

"It doesn't have to be fancy, Amanda. Just put on jeans and a nice shirt or something" she said flouncing down on the bed. Chris was wearing dark blue jeans and a purple strapless shirt with a white jacket and white sneakers. Amanda went over to her drawer and pulled out a pair of dark blue jeans and pulled them on then went back to her closet and pulled a purple long sleeved shirt from its hanger. Her hair fell down around her face in its naturally curly state and she wore a light layer of makeup. Chris groaned when she saw Amanda was going to wear a purple shirt too. She always made fun of couples who coordinated when they went out. Amanda asked her what she was groaning about but Chris just shook her head and said it was nothing. She finished her look with a pair of black sneakers. "See that wasn't so hard was it?" Chris asked sarcastically.

"Don't be a smart ass" Amanda said as she walked over to grab her wallet and keys from the dresser. She stuffed both into her pocket and then left the bedroom. Chris followed and watched as she filled both of Frannie's bowls. When she finished, they left the apartment and headed to meet Beth at the restaurant. Amanda was nervous for this dinner. It'd taken her a lot longer to get dressed than normal because she was trying to think of what Beth would wear. It was a lost cause because she knew next to nothing about the woman so she had no idea what to expect. She didn't want Chris to be more interested in her ex than she was in her. As much as she tried to hide it, Chris could tell that she was anxious. She took one hand off the steering wheel and reached over to take Amanda's hand. She felt the tension in her hand slowly disappear. She hoped that this dinner would be uneventful and that the time would pass quickly.

Chris pulled in front of the restaurant and found a parking spot. She turned off the car and they both took off their seatbelts to get out. Chris opened her door and noticed that Amanda was just sitting there, staring out the window. She looked in the same direction to see what she was staring at but saw nothing but the side of a building. Amanda seemed to be in trance and Chris didn't even want to know what was going on in her head.

"Hey" she said getting Amanda's attention. Amanda snapped out of her zone and looked at her girlfriend. "You ready?" she asked. Amanda nodded, took a deep breath, then opened her door and got out of the car. Chris got out and met her on the sideway and they walked up to the restaurant together. Chris took Amanda by the hand as they walked, "Relax" she whispered. "It's gonna be fine". Amanda silently nodded her head kept walking. They went inside and had only a short wait to be seated at their reserved table. Chris ordered a bottle of wine that she knew Beth would like. She poured a glass for herself and Amanda and they waited for Beth to arrive. A few minutes later, she walked up to their table in white pants and green floral shirt. They both stood up to greet her. Amanda got a simple hello and a handshake while Chris got a kiss on the cheek and a hug that seemed a little more than just friendly. Chris pulled out her chair for her to sit then poured her a glass of wine before returning to her own seat. Beth took a sip from her glass and smiled.

"You remembered my wine?" she said obviously pleased.

"Uh, yeah. I did" Chris said picking up her menu. She looked it over and decided what she wanted and asked Amanda if she wanted to share an appetizer. Once they'd all settled on their picks for dinner, she waved the waitress over so they could order. Amanda reached for her wine glass and Beth noticed that she wasn't wearing her ring. Her mind immediately went to the possibility that she and Chris were having problems and what that could mean for her.

"So, how do you like it here in New York" Beth asked taking another sip of her wine.

"I like it fine" Chris answered. "It's different. Colder…but I like it".

"And your parents?"

"They don't have any complaints" she said picking up her wine glass and taking a sip.

"And you two, you've been married for how long now?" she asked trying to sound casual about her inquiry. Chris wasn't sure if she should tell Beth that she and Amanda weren't really married. She didn't want to upset Amanda and she didn't want to give Beth any ideas.

"Um, we're….we're actually not married" Chris said deciding to answer honestly. "We were working on a case, undercover posing as a married couple but we were never married" she explained. Amanda picked up her glass and took a large gulp of wine. "But we've been dating for, ummm, about a month now" she added quickly.

"Oh, I see". Beth got a noticeable spark in her eyes upon hearing this new piece of information. Chris didn't know what to say next. Luckily, their waitress came to the table with their food. They ate quietly for a while until Beth started making small talk. She asked Amanda about where she was from and how she'd made the move to New York. Amanda became more relaxed as the evening went on and her alcohol consumption increased. She talked more freely and showed Christina a lot of affection. Chris could tell that Beth thought Amanda was marking her territory but she knew that this was just how Amanda was, especially when she'd been drinking. They were at the restaurant for an hour and a half before finally asking for the check. Chris tried to pay but Beth insisted on taking care of the bill. "You can get the next one" she said flirtatiously. Amanda was past letting Beth's antics get to her. She could tell that Chris didn't like how Beth was acting. Once the bill was paid, they walked out of the restaurant together. They said goodbye and Chris and Amanda walked hand in hand back to Chris' car. She opened the door for Amanda to get in then walked around and got in the driver's seat and made the drive back to Amanda's apartment. Amanda didn't notice that Chris was planning to stay the night until she saw her pull an overnight bag from the backseat.

"You're staying the night?" she asked surprised. Chris nodded her head.

"Is that ok?" she asked.

"Yeah, of course" she said quickly. "I mean, Frannie really misses sharing the bed with you so…it'll be good for her for you to stay".

"Oh really. Just good for Frannie?" she asked pretending offence. Amanda laughed and Chris gave her a playful shove then headed up to her building in front of her. Amanda jogged to catch up with her and shoved her back. They went upstairs to the apartment and changed out of their clothes, not bothering to put any pajamas on. They barely made it to the bed before they'd divested each other of their underwear. Their hands roamed all over each other's bodies but, as expected, Chris took control. She knew exactly what she was doing. Amanda couldn't help her mind wandering back to what Chris had said to Rankins in the interrogation room about knowing what women wanted and how to please them. She knew that Chris was only guessing at what she wanted but her best guesses were the right ones so far. She let all of her thoughts go as Christina feasted on her body. She couldn't get enough of how she made her feel. She wanted to make her feel just as good. Chris was caught off guard when Amanda lifted her hips and rolled them over so that she was on top. She laughed lightly and tried to turn them back over but Amanda held her down.

"What are you doing?" she asked still trying to gain the upper hand. Amanda used her position and body weight to keep her from gaining back control.

"You can't always be in control" Amanda whispered in her ear.

"Who says?" Chris asked with a smirk.

"I do". She made a trail of kissed from her lips to her neck. "Tell me what to do" she whispered. Chris shifted uncomfortably beneath her. She wasn't used to being in this position. When Chris was with a straight woman she was always the dominate one. Even though she knew she shouldn't, she still thought of Amanda as straight. Chris was the first woman she'd ever been with and she'd probably be the last. "Christina" Amanda said pulling her from her thoughts. "Tell me what to do" she repeated. Chris pulled her down into a kiss, sliding her tongue past her lips to caress the inside of her mouth. She took her hand and led it to her chest, cupping and squeezing her breast. As their kiss continued, she pushed Amanda's hand further downward until it was positioned between her legs. She slipped her fingers between her folds and helped her find the right spot. When she felt Amanda's fingers rub against her clit, she moaned aloud.

"Right there" she breathed out. "Stay there". Amanda continued to rub against the spot that was eliciting the most response from her lover. "Harder" Chris moaned softly. "Uhmmm….faster". Amanda did everything Chris told her to do and was happy that it was pleasing to her. After a few more minutes of touching and teasing and instruction, Amanda brought Christina to orgasm. Chris thought that after giving Amanda a little bit of control she'd be satisfied but it only made Amanda want to control her more. She kept resisting Chris' efforts to take the reins.

"Amanda" she groaned in frustration.

"Let me make love to you" she whispered. It took everything inside of her not to blurt out a harsh no and push Amanda away. The last person that wanted that from her was Beth and that had ended horribly. She hadn't been with Amanda that long but she didn't want things to end badly between them. She didn't want things to end at all but, knowing Chris and her history, things would most likely end. If or when they did, she wanted it to be on good terms. They still had to work together. "Chris" Amanda said, again pulling her from her thoughts. She sighed and pushed Amanda from on top of her.

"I'm sorry" she whispered. She sat up and rubbed her temples, attempting to relax herself and push the thoughts away.

"What is it?" Amanda asked.

"I just….I'm not very good at this" she said honestly.

"Not very good at what?" she asked confused. Chris pulled her legs into her chest and shrugged her shoulders. On the inside, she was like a fortress. Amanda hit wall after wall of built up emotion. She wasn't usually the most patient person in the world but she felt like she did a good job of it with Christina. Here she was at another wall and she knew she'd have to take it down brick by brick. "Talk to me". Chris just sat there quietly. "Is this about dinner with Beth?"

"No".

"Is it about…Franco?"

"No" she said quickly with a hint of offence in her voice.

"Well, then what is it?" Amanda asked trying to get her frustration in check.

"I can't do this" she said softly.

"You can't do what?" Amanda asked nervously.

"I can't pretend….that I'm…." she sighed and ran her hands through her hair. "I don't know. I don't wanna hurt you Amanda".

"You won't".

"Yes, I will" she said softly. "I will hurt you. I don't wanna hurt you" she repeated. She was genuinely saddened by what she knew was inevitable. In her mind, she thought it would be best to stop things before they went too far. In her heart, she wanted to keep going and truly let herself fall in love for the first time. She just couldn't get out of her own way. Amanda didn't know what to say. She scoot closer to Chris and wrapped her arms around her, placing soft kisses on her shoulder. She could hear the sincerity in her voice. She sounded so sure of herself but Amanda was sure of herself too. She didn't want things to end between them and she wasn't going to let Chris sabotage their relationship. She wasn't going to give her up without a fight.


	23. Chapter 23: It's Not Gonna Work

Chapter 23: It's Not Gonna Work

The next morning, they went in to work together. They'd barely said a word to each other all morning. Everyone noticed how distant they seemed to be from one another. They danced around each other for hours and when it was time for them to break for lunch, Chris opted to stay behind at the station while the rest of the team left for lunch. She didn't want to deal with the awkwardness that was happening between her and Amanda. She knew Olivia, Nick and Fin could tell something was up between them and she didn't want to deal with their probing. Captain Cragen noticed her sitting at her desk and went over to talk to her.

"Reyes, you not eating lunch?" he asked. She shook her head from side to side.

"I'm not hungry" she said looking at him over her shoulder.

"Everything alright with you and Rollins?"

"Yeah, everything's fine" she said quickly. "Did someone say something?" she asked. He shook his head.

"No. I'm just checking in".

"Oh. Well, everything's fine" she said again. Cragen wasn't a fool. He knew, just like Fin, Olivia and Nick, that something was going on between her and Amanda. He'd warned them to leave their relationship at the door or changes would have to be made. So far whatever it was that was happening between them wasn't affecting their work. He hoped that they'd work things out before it could. She could feel him staring at her but she kept her eyes on her computer screen until he walked away and went back to his office. Her phone vibrated on the desk and she checked to see that she'd gotten a message from Franco asking her about drinks. He wanted to meet that night at a bar, her choice he said. She texted him back that she'd talk to Amanda and get back to him. When they got back from lunch, Chris asked Amanda if they could talk in private. They went back to the cribs and shut the door.

"Look, I know you're not happy with me right now but while we're at work can we just…try to get along" Chris said sitting down on one of the beds.

"I didn't know we weren't getting along" Amanda said leaning against the bunk across from where she was sitting.

"We've barely said two words to each other all day. They might not say anything but Fin, Olivia and Nick are noticing it". Amanda didn't seem to care so she said what she knew would get her attention. "The captain is noticing it too".

"How do you know that?" she asked.

"He came over to my desk after you left for lunch; asked me how everything was between us" she said filling her in on her little chat with their boss. "He's not blind Amanda. He didn't make Captain by being oblivious". Amanda folded her arms over her chest and sighed heavily.

"You still don't wanna tell me what last night was about?" she asked. Chris shrugged her shoulders.

"I already told you" she said trying to get out of talking about it.

"No, you didn't" Amanda said angrily.

"Ok, can we not talk about this right now? Please?" she asked. "I just want us to agree that when we come to work, we leave our problems at the door". Amanda nodded.

"Alright" she agreed.

"Ok, good" Chris said letting out a relieved sigh. She stood up from the bed and walked over to her girlfriend. "Can we kiss and make up?" she asked sarcastically. She leaned in and tried to kiss her but Amanda put her hand up and stopped her.

"No" she said firmly. "This isn't over". She stepped around her and walked out of the room. Chris turned and followed her, walking quickly to catch up.

"Franco wants us to go for a drink with him tonight" she said walking beside her.

"What is his deal?" Amanda asked. She was completely annoyed by him and his player mentality. "He knows we're together but he has no problem flirting with me".

"That's just Franco" Chris said, telling her the same thing she'd tell anyone about her old handler. "He'll grow up one of these days". She followed Amanda to her desk so she could get an answer. "Sooo….drinks?"

"Yeah, ok" she said agreeing to meet up with him.

"Drinks with who?" Amaro asked from his desk, being nosey as usual. Chris ignored him and went back to her desk.

"Franco" Amanda answered. Fin shook his head from side to side. "What?" Amanda asked interested by his reaction.

"I don't like him" he answered honestly.

"I don't think he likes you either" Chris said looking at Fin over her shoulder. He looked up and saw a smile on her face so he knew she was just pulling his leg.

"Well, can we come?" Nick asked. "I could use a drink".

"Why not? Let's make it a family outing" Chris said sarcastically. Olivia turned around and punched her playfully in the arm. "Ouch" Chris said jokingly rubbing her arm as if she were actually in pain. She and Olivia had grown past their dislike for one another. More like Olivia had gotten past her dislike for Chris. They weren't best friends or even good friends but they got along well enough. Chris was happy about that. For her, there were few things worse than having to work with someone every day that she didn't like. They talked a little more about it and everyone said they'd be down for a drink after work. They even invited Captain Cragen to join them. He declined saying he had a date with Ilene. They were finally able to call it quits at six thirty. They decided to go for a bite to eat before heading to the bar. They walked in at eight thirty and grabbed a table in the middle of the bar. Franco walked in about ten minutes later and saw that Chris had brought everyone with her. He took out his phone and sent a text inviting someone of his own before going over to the table to join them.

"Hey" he said pulling up a chair, "whole gang's here. Nice". A waitress was passing by so he reached out his hand tapped her on the arm. "Let me get a pitcher of budlight sweetheart" he ordered more than asked. She nodded her head. "Thanks. So…" he said turning his attention back to everyone sitting at the table. "Is this a regular thing; you all going out for a drink after work?"

"Not a regular thing" Nick answered. "Maybe a couple times a week".

"That's nice, you know. You gotta like the people you work with, especially on the job". The waitress brought over his pitcher and sat it on the table with some extra glasses. "Thanks honey".

"Sam" Chris said. "Her name is Sam". Franco met her eyes and received a discerning stare.

"Sam" he corrected himself, looking away from Chris to the waitress. "Thanks Sam".

"You're welcome" she said giving Chris a look of thanks. She walked away to tend to her other tables. He took one of the glasses and filled it with beer then set it in front of Chris.

"Drink up….sweetheart" he added. Chris took the beer and took a drink. She sat the glass back down then punched Franco in the arm. He hid his grimace and poured himself a glass of beer. He pushed the pitcher to the center of the table and told them to help themselves. "Excuse me, Sam" he said, stopping the waitress as she walked by their table. "Can I get another, please?" he asked gesturing to the pitcher.

"Coming right up, boss" she said sarcastically.

"I think she likes me" Franco said arrogantly. Chris laughed and shook her head, picking up her beer to take another drink. "So Mandy" he said turning to Amanda, "Can I call you Mandy?" he asked. Chris put her beer down on the table with a little more force than necessary.

"No" Amanda said giving Chris a pacifying pat on the thigh. "I'd prefer Amanda...or Rollins. Not Mandy".

"Ok…Amanda then" he said choosing to call her by her first name. "Chris tells me you're from Georgia". She nodded her head as confirmation. "That's a long way to travel for a job".

"Well, I like to learn from and work with the best" she said. Nick raised his glass to the statement.

"You from out of town too" Franco asked intentionally trying to include the others in the conversation. He didn't want it to be obvious that his only real interest was in Chris and Amanda. Nick nodded his head.

"Miami" he said, "Greatest place on earth".

"Yeah right" Fin said laughing. Chris' brother Robbie walked into the bar and spotted his sister and Franco sitting at a table in the middle of the floor. He walked over and pulled a chair from another table taking a seat next to Olivia. He had his eye on her and hoped that his sister would stay out of it.

"What are you doing here?" Chris asked when her brother joined them.

"Franco invited me". He took one of the glasses and filled it with beer then took a big gulp. Chris glared at Franco who avoided making eye contact with her. "How are you?" he asked leaning towards Olivia.

"Don't even think about it" Chris said shutting him down before he could even get started.

"What?" he asked innocently. "I was just being polite".

"Yeah right" she said rolling her eyes. They drank their beers and enjoyed light conversation. Franco was of course focusing most of his attention on Amanda. Little did they know, he was only trying to separate her from his real goal. Their conversation was interrupted when a guy came over to their table and asked if he could buy Chris a drink.

"No thank you. I'm good" she said, declining politely.

"Oh come on" he persisted. "Just one drink".

"No really. Thanks but I'm good" she said declining again. He laughed and shook his head.

"Yeah, my buddy over there" he said gesturing to a guy sitting at the bar looking at them, "He told me not even bother trying. Said you looked like the stuck up bitch type".

"What'd you just say?" Robbie asked rhetorically. He stood up and got in the guy's face. Chris got up and tried to pull her brother away.

"Robbie, just let it go" she said in his ear.

"No, I want to him to repeat what he just said" he said shrugging her off. "What the fuck did you just day to my sister?" he yelled in his face.

"Hey, all I'm saying is that my buddy warned me" he said holding his hands up defensively. "It's not my fault he turned out to be right".

"Get him Robbie" Franco said, egging him on. Chris glared at him for encouraging her brother to continue this conflict. She continued trying to calm him down but her efforts were worthless. The fuse had been lit and there was no putting it out. Amanda stood up and took her by the hand, pulling her back from the confrontation.

"Oh, I get it" he said, seeing Amanda grab Chris hand. "You're not a stuck up bitch. You're a dyke" he said in disgust. Before she could stop him, Robbie brought his arm back, hand balled up into a fist, and brought it forward with all the force he could muster, cracking the guy in the mouth.

"Robbie, stop it!" Chris yelled letting go of Amanda's. She caught his arm when he brought it back again, stopping him from punching the guy a third time. His friend hopped down from his bar stool and came over to help his buddy. Franco got up from his chair and stood in front of the guy.

"Don't even think about it" he said taking a protective stance in front of Chris and her brother. The owner kicked the guy and his friend out of the bar and told Chris to get her brother under control. He wouldn't hesitate to call the cops if he had to. As the guys left the bar, Robbie continued to taunt them.

"Robbie, knock it off!" she yelled. "Sit down" she said pushing him back into his chair. He sat down, still seething from the altercation. He picked up his beer and drank it down in one breath. He flexed his hand open and closed, working through the pain in his now bruised and torn knuckles. Chris punched Franco in the chest and walked angrily to the back of the bar. Franco kicked a chair then followed her to the back. "What the hell was that?" she asked angrily, trying to keep her voice down.

"It looked to me like a big brother standing up for his little sister" he said nonchalantly. "It's what any brother would do".

"And you think it's wise to encourage my brother to get in a bar fight?" she asked.

"I didn't encourage him".

"You didn't? So that "Get him, Robbie", that was you trying to dissuade him from punching the guy in the face?" she asked annoyed.

"Look, somebody had to put that asshole in his place. I figured he was the best person to do it" he said defending himself. "It was either gonna be me or him that stood up for you. It sure as hell wasn't gonna be that girlfriend of yours". Rae scoffed and rolled her eyes. She was waiting for the time to come when Franco would bring Amanda into the equation. She wasn't going to let him make himself her hero.

"That's because Amanda understands that I don't need anyone to stand up for me" she said defending her girlfriend's inaction. "If I'd wanted the guy put in his place, I would've done it myself Franco. Do you know how many guys there are out there that are just like him? Huh?" she asked not really wanting an answer from him. "Way too many. I'd spend more than half my life standing up for myself" she said using air quotes. "It's called picking your battles and he wasn't worth it".

"But you are" he said forcefully.

"Don't do this" she said firmly. Don't mak…." she paused when someone came out of the bathroom and walked between them. "Don't make this about us" she said lowering her voice.

"I can't not make this about us because this is about us. You deserve someone who thinks you're worth every battle, even the ones you think are insignificant. I'm that guy" he said confidently. "I'm tired of seeing you waste your time, bouncing from one girl to the next to the next".

"Franco" she said running her hands through her hair. "If there was any guy I would ever be with, you know it would be you. But I wouldn't be with a guy. You need to start accepting the fact that I'm a lesbian" she said punctuated the lesbian part of that statement.

"No" he said simply. "I remember you, how you were with me, when we were together".

"That was the job" she said wanting desperately for him to move on from the idea of them being together. "I was doing my job".

"Like you were doing your job with her?" he asked referring to Amanda and their recent undercover operation. "That's how you do your job?"

"That was different" she whispered. He shook his head. "Yes" she said, "it was. It was different".

"It's not gonna work out" he said assuredly. "You and I both know, it's not gonna work. You're gonna hurt her".

"No, I won't" she said unsure herself. He laughed.

"Yeah, you will. It's what you do". Franco knew Chris well and he knew that no woman had ever walked away from her unscathed. "You're not built for it, a relationship".

"And here I thought that's what you were angling for" she said crossing her arms over her chest.

"We're more compatible than you and Amanda, or anyone else for that matter, will ever be".

"So what do you want?" she asked. "You want us to be together from across the country, in what, an open relationship?" she asked rhetorically. "Because monogamy, it's not for us, right? So you sleep with whoever you want to on the side and I do the same and we take turns flying across the country to see each every once in a while? That's what you want?" Franco couldn't deny how ridiculous that arrangement sounded. But he still hadn't told Chris the real reason he'd come to New York. He figured now was the perfect time.

"No need to fly across the country" he said, "just drive across the city". Chris looked confused by his statement. "I told you I came here to check up on you but that was a lie. I came here for a job interview".

"What?" she asked in disbelief. He nodded his head.

"Yep. It's been in the works for a while now. I finally got here for an in person interview and I got it. I got the job. Brooklyn narcotics. I already accepted". He waited for a response but Chris was stunned. She couldn't find any words. She leaned against the wall and took a deep breath, trying to process the info she'd just gotten. "I accepted on the condition that they had another open spot…..for you" he added. Her eyes shot up to meet his. "That's right. We could be together again" he said stepping into her personal space. "You and me, that's how it's always been. From the minute you walked into the squad back in San Bern and Cap assigned you to my detail, I knew. I knew we'd….we'd always be a team". Chris shook her head.

"We'll never be a team in the way you want, Franco" she whispered. "Ever".

"Don't say no. Just think about it" he said bringing his hands up on either side of her face. She looked into his eyes and saw how much he wanted her to say she'd at least consider it. She gave a small nod but couldn't bring herself to hold eye contact with him. Deep down she knew her mind was already made up. He lifted her head and brought their lips together. Chris pushed him away but soon enough. Nick had come back to use the bathroom and had seen them kiss. Chris cursed inwardly when she saw him standing there looking at them. Franco walked past him out to the bar, stopping by the table to say his goodbyes. He left some money on the table and then left the bar. Chris took a step to walk past him but he blocked her way.

"You know you shouldn't play Rollins like this. It's not a cool" he said giving his opinion on the matter.

"You know you should really learn to mind your own business". She pushed past him and went back out to the table. Amanda could see that she wasn't very happy. There was an awkward silence between all of them. Chris grabbed her beer from the table and finished it, not bothering to sit down. Nick came back from the bathroom and retook his seat. He stared her down and she returned the glare. "I'm gonna go" she said ending the standoff. She slapped her brother on the shoulder. "Come on. Let's get outta here" she said in tone that said he didn't have a choice. He drank down the rest of his beer and said his goodbyes then headed out of the bar. Chris said goodbye as well and turned to leave. Amanda stood up from her chair and grabbed her by the arm, stopping her from leaving.

"Hey, are you….you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'm…I'm good" she said hesitantly. She honestly didn't know how she felt. She needed some time to digest the events of the evening. "I'm gonna take Robbie home. Call me when you get in. I'll come over".

"Ok" she said in agreement. Chris turned to leave again but stopped suddenly and turned back to Amanda. She kissed her sweetly on the lips then finally walked out of the bar. Nick shook his head as he watched the scene in front of him. His reaction didn't go unnoticed by Olivia and Fin. Amanda watched Chris walk away through the bar's glass window until she disappeared out of sight. She rejoined her colleagues at their table and picked up her beer to take a drink. She stopped when she realized that Nick was staring at her.

"What?" she asked, wanting to know why he was looking at her like she had two heads. He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders.

"Nothing" he said, deciding not to tell her about what he'd seen. He thought she had a right to know but debated whether he was the one to tell her. He secretly wanted her to leave so he could run it by Liv and Fin. After another ten minutes, Amanda decided to leave. She wanted to get home and call Chris to come over to her place. She knew that everything wasn't ok with her. She just hoped Chris wanted to talk to her about it.


	24. Chapter 24: I'm Sorry

Chapter 24: I'm Sorry

Once Amanda left the bar, Liv and Fin started to pry into Nick's thoughts. They'd noticed the tension between him and Chris and the stare he'd given Rollins before she decided to leave. He was debating whether he should say anything about what he saw. It really was none of his business but he didn't like cheaters and he didn't want to see Rollins get hurt. He thought the relationship was a mistake anyway being that they worked together.

"Look, I'm not sure what I saw" he said finally deciding to tell them. "It happened too fast".

"But you did see something?" Fin asked.

"They kissed" he said simply. "Chris and Franco, when I went back for the bathroom, I saw them kissing. I don't know if he kissed her or if she kissed him but their lips were definitely touching. She pushed off but….I don't know; that could've just been because she saw me there". He picked up his glass and finished off his beer.

"Oh come on. He definitely kissed her" Olivia said confidently.

"What makes you so sure?" Fin asked. He was remembering the conversation he had with Chris before she and Amanda officially got together. She'd warned him that she wasn't the relationship type. He was kicking himself now for encouraging her to try with his partner.

"Well first of all, she's a lesbian. They don't really enjoy kissing men" she said taking a drink of her beer. "Secondly, he's obviously really interested in Chris, not Amanda". They looked at each other and then at her. It was obvious to her that they'd never considered that his real interest  
>was in Christina. "He just wants Amanda out of the picture so he can move in and take her place".<p>

"Why would he think he could take her place?" Amaro asked confused. "I mean, he knows she's a lesbian. She would never be with him".

"He must have some reason to believe that she would" Fin said receiving inquisitive looks from his partners. He must know something that they don't. "What?" he asked looking at their faces. "Come on, you gotta know there's history there that we know nothing about".

"Well, whatever it is, it's none of our business" Olivia said.

"You don't think we should tell Amanda?" Fin asked. Olivia brought her beer to her lips and finished it.

"Nope" she said getting up from her chair. "I think we should stop speculating". She took her jacket from the back of her chair and put it on. "They can work it out themselves. Stay out of it" she said in a warning tone. She took out her wallet to leave some money for the drinks but the guys told her not to worry about it. "See you guys tomorrow". She left them sitting in the bar and made her way home.

Amanda called Chris when she got home and she came right over. She had a bag with clothes to sleep in, a change of clothes for work and a toiletry bag. She went into the bedroom to change then to the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. She put her bag in the closet then joined Amanda in bed. She turned off the lamp and settled down to go to sleep. Amanda laid there for a few minutes but she couldn't go to sleep. There was too much on her mind. She was tired of being in a relationship with someone who had reinforced steel around her entire life. She needed to start pushing Chris to open up more with her or they weren't going to work out. She reached over Chris and turned her lamp back on.

"I can't do this with you anymore" she said softly. Chris looked over her shoulder at her girlfriend.

"Can't do what?" she asked confused.

"I can't….be in this relationship alone. It's like you're not even here. You don't talk to me, I don't think you listen to me; I don't know who you are". She looked her in the eyes, "You don't let me know who you are. You won't let me into your life".

"I'm doing the best I can".

"If this is your best then we're in a hell of a lot of trouble" Amanda said honestly. She couldn't believe that Chris was really giving her all she could. "I need…I need help from you. You know I've never done this before. I don't know what I'm doing…."

"I don't know what I'm doing either, Amanda" she snapped. "This is new to me too. I don't how many times I have to tell you that I'm no good at this for you to believe me".

"What happened with you and Beth?" she asked. She wasn't going to take some vague "it was complicated" answer from her this time. She wanted some real answers.

"I already told you…."

"Yeah, it's complicated" Amanda said finishing her sentence for her. "I don't want to hear that anymore. I want to know what happened".

"We dated for a while. She wanted more than I did. I tried….to give her what she wanted but I just…." She paused trying to think of how best to explain herself. "I just couldn't do it. It wasn't me".

"What does that mean?"

"I cheated on her" she said bluntly. There was no hint of remorse in her voice. Amanda wouldn't be surprised if she didn't feel anything at all about how she'd treated Beth or Ryanne or any other woman she'd been with in her life. "I was still in school when we were together. I was young and I just wanted to have fun but she wasn't about that. She wanted me to move in with her. She tried to talk me out of going to the academy and just stay home with her. She wanted to marry me and have kids and….everything that was so far outside of the plans I had for myself. Still outside my plans. She was so serious about us from the beginning and I never was. I don't settle down, Amanda" she said turning to look at her. "I'll probably never want to move in with you. I don't want to get married or have kids or have a routine. It just…it seems like eventually that's what you'll want and I can't give it to you. I'm sorry but I can't".

"I haven't asked you for that" Amanda didn't understand why Chris was dismissing their relationship for reason that hadn't even come up for them yet.

"Amanda, you wanted me to continuing living here with you after the Rankins case was over" she reminded her. "I know we came to an understanding that it was too soon but the truth is…it won't matter how long we're together. I just….I don't see myself ever wanting to live with you" she said honestly. She realized how bad that sounded. "Not just with you, with anyone" she said quickly.

"I have never met anyone that's as emotionally unavailable as you are…in my entire life" Amanda said annoyed. "Why would you even say that you'd try to be open with me if you knew if would never happen?"

"Because I did want to try. And I have tried" she quickly added. "I can't help that this is how I am".

"I did" she shot back.

"Oh come, Amanda. It wasn't hard for you. You share your feelings with perfect strangers all of the time" she said referring to her going to meetings. "I don't do that. I don't share".

"Oh right. You're a suck it and bare it kind of girl" she said sarcastically. "You know, I was like too and it didn't get me anywhere".

"You asked. Sorry if it's not what you hoping for in your first lesbian experience but this is what you got. You got me". As soon as the words left her mouth, she knew she was gonna catch hell for it.

"My first lesbian experience?" Amanda asked rhetorically. Chris sighed.

"Amanda…."

"Get out" she said not wanting anything else from her. She was completely done with Christina and her attitudes and her emotional handicap and her complicated relationship that weren't relationships. Chris thought about arguing and apologizing, trying to get Amanda to let her stay but she didn't. She knew it was useless. She didn't think she would change and Amanda didn't either so staying was pointless. She got out of the bed and changed back into her pants, put her shoes on, grabbed her bag and her keys and left the bedroom. Frannie woke up when she shut the bedroom door and got up from her bed, following her to the front door. When she opened the door, she tried to out with her.

"You can't come with me" she said kneeling down and scratching her behind the ears. She got up and turned to leave. Frannie whined and tried to go out the door with her again. "Frannie, no" Chris said pushing her back inside the door. "You have to stay here". She wanted to say that she'd be back but she couldn't. She probably wouldn't be. Frannie sat down just inside the door and looked up at Chris with her big, brown eyes. She made Chris feel so much worse about leaving. She leaned down and kissed her on the head then turned and left the apartment to go home.

The next morning when Chris came in to work, Amanda wasn't at her desk. She good morning to everyone and all except Fin said it back. Rae guessed that he'd talked to Amanda and she told him about what happened between them. She sat down at her desk and started on her paperwork. Amanda walked in at nine fifteen and went to her desk. The tension between Amanda and Chris was off the charts and it was felt by everyone. Hoping to ease some tension, Olivia invited everyone over to her place to celebrate her promotion and the Captain had something to tell the squad. Chris thought about saying she couldn't make it when she heard everyone else say they'd be there. Olivia could tell that she was about to decline coming over. She turned her chair around and tapped her on the shoulder.

"You're coming" she said when Chris turned to look at her. She started to argue but Olivia didn't give her the chance. "I don't wanna hear it. You're coming". She turned her chair back around to her desk and got back to work. Chris did the same. A couple hours passed and they'd been working at their desks, sharing sporadic small talk between them. Amanda hadn't said a word to Chris all day despite her trying to engage in friendly conversation with her. Beth texted Chris and asked if she wanted to meet for lunch. She looked over her shoulder at Amanda and thought about what she'd think. Amanda got up from her desk and left the squad room. Nick, Liv and Fin watched as Chris got up and followed her. She saw Amanda go into the bathroom and entered not far behind her. She leaned against the sink and waited for her to come out of the stall. Amanda paused for a moment when she came out and saw Chris standing there but then continued to the sink to wash her hands.

"Come on, Amanda. How long are you going to ignore me?" she asked. Amanda looked at her as she turned off the water then walked around her to get paper towels to dry her hands. "I'm sorry, okay. I know I said some things last night that….hurt your feelings" she said apologizing. "But you asked me and I was just trying to be open and honest with you" she said in her own defense.

"Yeah, it was a very enlightening conversation" she said throwing her towels in the trash. "Thanks for your honesty". She reached to open the door but Chris blocked her way.

"Look, I….I shouldn't have said that, the thing about this being a lesbian experience for you. I'm sorry but you have to understand that that's usually how this works for me with women who've never been with other women before". She was doing her best to apologize but she wasn't sure it was working.

"If I haven't convinced you yet that I'm not like those women then I never will".

"That's not true" she said quickly. "I know you're not like that I just….I don't know why I said it. I just came out and then it was too late to take it back. I'm sorry" she said apologizing again. "Can we please just…can we just….can we…" she stumbled trying to figure out what she wanted moving forward. She hadn't thought through what she'd say when talked to Amanda so now that they were talking so was stuck with her thoughts.

"Can we just what?" Amanda asked prompting her to spit out whatever she was asking. Chris shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't know" she said honestly.

"I don't either. This isn't going to work until you figure out what you want. Let me know when you do". Chris stayed in place in front of the door until she realized that there was nothing else that she could say. The conversation was over. She moved out of the way and let Amanda leave the bathroom. She leaned against the door and ran her hands through her hair, letting out a frustrated sigh. The door pushed into her back causing her to move quickly out of the way. She apologized to the uniform trying to get in for blocking the door and went back to her desk. She replied to Beth and said that she was free for lunch and to meet her downstairs at noon. Everyone did their own thing for lunch that day and Chris was the last to leave. As she was getting ready to leave, Cragen called for her to come in his office. She went inside, shut the door and took a seat in front of his desk.

"What's going on with you and Rollins?" he asked getting right to the point.

"Uh…it's…."

"Before you try to concoct a story, let me just tell you that you're not a very good liar" he said stopping her before she could deny problems between them. "That's a compliment" he added.

"It's just…we're just working through some kinks is all" she answered. "We'll work it out" she said confidently. "And it won't interfere with us doing our jobs" she added. He nodded his head and tapped his pen on his desk.

"You coming to Liv's tonight?" he asked. She nodded her head. "Good. Alright get out of here. Go get some lunch" he said dismissing her. She got up from her chair and left his office. She stopped by her desk and grabbed her jacket and phone then headed out to lunch. She called Beth when she went downstairs and didn't see her waiting. She directed her until she found her sitting in her silver BMW. She leaned over and opened the door for her from the inside. Chris got in the car, shut the door and put her seat belt on.

"Hi" she said looking over at Beth.

"Hi" she said back with a sweet smile. She was happy that Chris had agreed to have lunch with her. She was even happier that they were going without Amanda.

"You got a new car" Chris said checking out the interior.

"Yeah. You like it?"

"Yeah" she nodded, "it's nice".

"So where to?" Beth asked as started the car. Chris shrugged her shoulders.

"You decide" she said leaving the decision to her. Beth nodded, put the car in drive and pulled out onto the street. They went to a small Chinese restaurant not far from Beth's museum. They were seated and quickly decided on what they wanted. The waiter took their orders and left the table. "So how's the museum? Have you…started there yet?"

"Not officially but I've been in my office every day, just testing the water; watching the day to day things" she answered. "I wanted to make sure I won't be in over my head when I do start".

"I don't think I've ever seen in over your head with anything" Chris said taking a drip of her water.

"I was with you" she said honestly. Chris cleared her throat and shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Beth's response had caught her completely off guard. Luckily, the waiter came over and set their food in front of them, giving her a chance to bounce back from the comment. He asked if they'd be needing anything else. They shook their heads no and he left them to enjoy their meal. "You weren't like anyone else I'd ever been with. I wasn't used to someone being just as, if not more, dominant than me". Chris wasn't sure what to say. She took small bites of her food and tried to think of where this conversation was going.

"Ummm, Beth I…."

"No, it's ok. You taught me a lot" she said interrupting what she assumed was going to be an apology. "I was trying to control you; to create the life for myself that I knew I wanted. You taught me that I can't change people to suit my needs. A relationship requires understanding and compromise and team work. I should've listened to you when you said you weren't ready to settle down" she said regretfully. "I want you to know that I've changed".

"I haven't" Chris said bluntly. Beth was noticeably taken back by her admission. "I'm still not ready to settle down. I still don't want to move in and get married and have kids. I'm…I'm still the same person I was when we were together".

"You must be different" she said taking a drink from her glass. "You're in a relationship with Amanda". Chris laughed.

"Yeah, well that's not really going well…right now" she admitted.

"Oh?" she said asking for elaboration.

"Yeah. She's…not very happy with me right now. My relationship skills are….lacking. She says I don't share enough with her, that she doesn't know who I am. She feels like she's in our relationship alone". She decided not to elaborate any further and focused on her lunch. They ate quietly for a few minutes before Beth spoke again.

"You know, that's typical of you" she said.

"What's typical of me?" she asked, unclear as to what Beth meant.

"Keeping your feelings to yourself" she clarified. "You never shared with me either".

"I did" Chris said defensively, "sometimes?" she added, not feeling certain of herself.

"You would pretend to share but it was artificial" she said taking another drink from her glass. "Nothing you ever told me was really of any importance". It was a tactic of hers to tell things that didn't really mean anything to her. She'd share enough detail to make Beth feel like she was with her so she'd stop probing. She never really let anyone know the depths of her soul. As usual, Chris shut down. Talking anymore about this would mean showing some real feeling and she didn't want to do that. She just continued to eat her lunch and hope the conversation went somewhere else. Twenty minutes later, they'd finished lunch, paid the bill and left the restaurant. Beth drove Chris back to the precinct and asked if they could do this again. "Maybe dinner next time?"

"Yeah, sure" Chris agreed. "I'll call you". She got of the car and made her way inside the precinct. Beth watched until she didn't see Christina anymore before driving away. She didn't get to tell Chris what she wanted to really wanted her to know. She hoped that one their next outing, she'd get all of her feelings out.


	25. Chapter 25: Spiraling Down

Chapter 25: Spiraling Down

When Chris walked back into the squad everyone was already back at their desks. She sat down and turned her laptop on to get back to work. She reached for her back pocket to pull out her phone but it wasn't there. She sighed and rolled her eyes at herself when she realized she left it in Beth's car. She picked up the phone on her desk and started to dial her number when she felt someone's breath on her ear. She turned and almost jumped out her skin when she saw Beth was there, just inches from her face.

"Jesus Christ" she said clutching her chest. "You scared the shit out of me" she said taking deep breaths.

"You left this in my car" she said holding out her phone to her. Chris looked around and saw that everyone was taking glances at her and Beth. She knew they remembered her from the restaurant and she was sure that if nobody else would give her shit about this, Fin would. She took her phone and thanked Beth for bringing it to her.

"I'll talk you soon?" she asked heading for the door. Chris nodded silently and waited until she'd left to turn back around to her computer. She could feel Fin's eyes boring into her back. She got up and went over to make herself a cup of coffee. Fin got up from his desk and went over to talk to her.

"So that's how you are, huh? You play Rollins, hurt her and already planning to jump into it with someone else" he said keeping his voice down.

"First of all, I didn't play her. Secondly, I'm not jumping into anything with anyone else. Beth and I had lunch. That's it". She poured coffee into her sugar and stirred it with a straw.

"Yeah right" he said unconvinced. "And you think that's all she wants?"

"I know it's not but I _do _know how to say no, Fin" Chris said. She knew that he and Amanda were good friends outside the job but she didn't like he was sticking his nose in their business. If Amanda felt a certain way about her having lunch with Beth, then she should be the one to talk to her.

"That's not what I heard" he said accusingly.

"Well, you shouldn't believe everything you hear". She threw her straw in the trash, picked up her coffee cup and went back to her desk. They spent the rest of day in relative silence. Nothing new came in so they made themselves keep occupied with paperwork. Chris left the squad at six o'clock to go home and make dinner for her family. Olivia left shortly after so she could get her house ready for later that evening. Amanda left to go to a meeting while Nick and Fin stuck around to hold down the fort. A couple hours later they were in Olivia's apartment. They'd already had dinner and a couple glasses of wine and Fin was asking when they'd be done so he could leave. Amanda poured everyone another glass of wine so the Captain could make a toast and tell everyone some good news. Since it was first announced that Olivia was being promoted to Sergeant, they were all nervous that she'd have to move to a different precinct. None of them wanted that. Luckily, because of all the changes happening at one pp they didn't have to worry anymore. They couldn't spare a new sergeant for the unit so Olivia would be staying on at SVU. Her role as a supervisor would be more official and Reyes would be partnered with Amaro from now on. They all raised their glasses to Liv, happy that she'd be staying with the team. They finished their drinks and shared some small talk. Nick decided to call it a night and said his goodbyes before making his way out of the apartment. Chris tried to talk to Amanda again but she wanted nothing to do with her. She said her goodbyes and left the apartment as well. Downstairs, she caught up with Nick and asked for a ride to the train. They were walking to his car when they saw a uniformed officer chasing a young male get hit by a car. Rollins stayed with the injured officer and Amaro joined the partner in the chase. It ended in an apartment building with the uniformed officer being shot in the leg and Amaro shooting the fourteen year old suspect. It wasn't long before the place was crawling with cops, all searching for the suspect's gun which wasn't recovered after the chase. Amaro's gun was taken for evidence and he was sent to the hospital to be examined. IAB started their investigation and it was obvious to Chris right away that there was bad blood between the units. To make matters even worse, Brian was part of the investigation.

Things happened quickly but it was clear that IAB was hanging Nick out to dry. They tried angling the shooting as poor judgment or impairment on Amaro's end because of his drinks earlier that evening. The uniform officer wasn't being much help and they still hadn't found the gun or the real perp. The investigation continued over the next couple days. Everyone was questioned about the night of the shooting. He was arrested, arraigned and released on bail. Then his house was shot at, while his mom and daughter were inside, by three young black males and he went after them with a baseball bat. Olivia tried to control him but his anger was understandably bubbling over. He sent his daughter back to DC with her mom and went to stay at Liv's place. He had a talk with Maria who said she wanted full custody of their daughter until his case settled. There was no telling when it'd be settled or what the outcome would be. He had a good lawyer but there wasn't much on his side. He figured it was time to cut his losses. He decided to make a deal.

When the DA refused to take his plea unless it included the hate crime enhancement, meaning a felony conviction on his record, he decided to take his chances with the grand jury. Amanda had to testify and things didn't seem to be going well for Amaro. Chris had put her efforts to reconcile with her on hold. All of their focus was on what was going on with Nick. He was another member of the squad being railroaded by IAB and they weren't at all happy about it. It came time for him to decide if he wanted to testify in front of the grand jury and he decided to speak up for himself. His lawyer thought it was a bad idea but he ignored her and it turned out, it was the right thing. The grand jury refused to indict and he was free to go. He'd be on desk duty for a while because of the shooting but he had his badge, his freedom, and he wouldn't lose his daughter. Now that he was back in the squad, Cragen had all of his detectives and his sergeant right where he wanted them. He chose that time to announce his retirement. Everyone could tell it hit Liv the hardest. He'd been there since her start in SVU. She didn't know how she'd get on without him. Not only was he leaving but he was leaving her in charge. She didn't know if she was ready but she would soon find out. As much as it hurt to see him go, she didn't know anyone on the force that deserved it more. It was bittersweet moment for all of them, even Chris who'd only been there a short time. They could all sense that a lot of changes were on the horizon and hoping that they were all good.

Olivia's first case in charge of the squad was of a teenaged girl found being assaulted in an alley. Amanda showed up late to the hospital after a late night of drinking and gambling. She'd been so stressed out with fighting with Chris, Amaro almost going to jail, and the Captain retiring that she hadn't been to a meeting in almost two weeks. She finally said to hell with it and went out to play cards. She'd been out late and had barely gotten any sleep when she got the call to meet Benson at the hospital. She made up a lie about needing to take Frannie to the vet to explain her tardiness. Olivia gave her a short lecture and they went to interview the victim. The case ended up taking them Jersey and Amanda found herself in Atlantic City. She was late, again, to meet Barba for a sit down with a judge to get their victim out of a juvenile detention center. She was butting heads with the DA and her attitude was all over the place. Everyone could see it, especially Chris. She knew Amanda was gambling again but she didn't say anything. Amanda was still refusing to talk to her because she didn't feel like Chris really wanted to be with her. She told her until she was ready to talk to her, really talk to her, then outside of work they had nothing to say to each other. So she didn't say anything about her gambling. It wasn't her concern anymore. The case ended well and Amanda felt like she'd actually done some good for the victim. Now she just had to work on doing some good for herself.

The squad's next case was a missing teenager, another young girl. Her parents came home to a ransacked house and blood in their bedroom. She was found on the roof of a building, threatening to jump. Amanda was sent up to try to talk her down. She did her best but the girl was hysterical and nothing Amanda said was calming her down. She jumped from the roof but Amanda had bought enough time for the fire department to get into place and blow up the inflatable. She was caught, unharmed, and taken to the hospital. Even though the fall didn't hurt her, Amanda's stomach fell when she watched her jump. She couldn't help thinking about Lindsay and how it must've been for her in her last moments. She wished she could've been there to try to talk her down. But then she thought it might've have ended the same way. She managed to keep herself together throughout the case. She didn't show up late or draw any undue attention to herself. Still Chris could see that she was spiraling and she couldn't decide if she wanted to step in or let her hit bottom. She thought about talking to Fin about it. He was still upset with her about the way things had ended between her and Amanda but he cared a lot about his partner and she knew that if she asked him, he'd step in. But she didn't ask.

The next few weeks went by and Chris had stopped trying to talk to Amanda. She was in her own world, dealing with her parents and her sister. There was already so much on her plate without having to deal with Amanda's gambling problem. She knew that she couldn't be with her while that was going on so she decided to let their relationship go until the time came that they were both in a better position to be together; _if_ the time came. They'd just finished the case about a comedian who made rape jokes and turned out he thought it was funny because he was a rapist himself. Chris used the showers at the precinct and then changed into jeans and a crop top. Her hair was naturally curled and she wore a little make up. She was sitting at her desk finishing up some paperwork so she could get out of there when she felt someone tap her on the shoulder. She turned around and saw Beth standing there and she strained not to roll her eyes. She'd told her to call when she got there and she would come down but she came up instead. She had a feeling that Beth was intentionally showing her face around the squad room because she wanted people, particularly Amanda, to know that it was her Chris was going out with. She really didn't like that.

"Hey. I just need to finish this" she said gesturing to the papers in front of her. "It'll just take a couple minutes. Sit down". Beth sat down in the chair next to Chris' desk to wait. Nick and Fin had already finished and gone home. Amanda was sitting at her desk pulling overtime. Chris assumed she needed the money to pay off her gambling debts. Olivia was still in her office, presumably waiting for Chris to turn in her reports. She finished them up then got up from her desk and delivered them to Benson, who complimented her look. She also told her how much she appreciated her being professional about her situation with Rollins. It was one less thing she had to worry about. While Chris was in the office talking to Olivia, Beth and Amanda were having a silent battle out in the squad room. Amanda could feel Beth's eyes on her but tried her best to ignore her. She finally couldn't take it anymore. She turned around and locked eyes with the woman who was obviously staking claim on her girlfriend; well her ex-girlfriend. Technically, they hadn't broken up. They'd just agreed to take a break from each other until they were both in a better place but with the way things were going between them, they might as well have said that they were over. Amanda didn't look away from Beth and Beth didn't look away from Amanda. Neither one of them was willing to back down from the other. Chris walked out of Benson's office and saw them staring each other down. She wasn't sure if they'd exchanged words but the look they were giving each other was enough. She walked over to her desk, gathered her things and then quickly got Beth out of the squad room. When they got on the elevator Chris pretended to have forgotten something. She quickly got off and told Beth she'd meet her at the car then went back to the squad room to talk to Amanda. She went over to her desk and sat down in the chair next to it. "I know you're still mad at me and that you don't want to talk to me but I just wanted to make sure that you know….I haven't given up on us. I know we haven't been talking but I do still want to try again".

"I noticed" she said sarcastically.

"Beth and I are just friends" she said knowing she was talking about her going out with her ex. Amanda gave her a look that said she wasn't at all convinced that that was all they were. "You know what I noticed?" she asked. "I noticed that you…." she paused and thought through what she was about to say. She decided that the middle of the squad room wasn't the best place to tell her that she knew she was gambling again. But she was sure that Amanda knew what she was going to say. "Never mind" she whispered. "I'll see you later". She got up and left the squad room again, leaving Amanda to work alone.

The next day was Amanda's day off. She went to a bar near her apartment to watch a game she'd placed a bet on. The clock was running down and it looked like her team was going to pull through for the win. That was until the final seconds of the game when a ref made a horrible call. She couldn't even watch the end of it. She just sat down at the bar and ordered another drink. She had no idea how she was going to get the money she owed. When she took Frannie out for a walk, she ran into her bookie who, in not so many words, threatened her and her dog. She assured him that she would get his money even though she didn't know yet how she'd make it happen. She finished her walk with Frannie then went home and paced around her apartment trying to think of what to do. She considered asking Chris for help but that thought quickly left her. Then she decided to call someone she'd told herself she wanted nothing to do with anymore. He told her to meet him at his bar so she left her apartment and headed over. She was sitting at the bar having another drink when Nate walked in. He went behind the bar, opened the register and got her the money she needed but he had his own condition for lending it to her. Her first thought was that he wanted sex and he could see that was where her mind went. But he didn't want that. He wanted her to go to a meeting with him. She really needed the money so she agreed. She went to the meeting with him that night, she shared and then she went home. She spent the rest of her weekend at home, just her and Frannie.

When she went into work on Monday morning, Olivia informed her that she was in the top ten for most overtime in the city. She made up an excuse about getting a lot of cases at one time, along with holiday spending tapping her out, but the truth was she needed that money to pay off her gambling debts. She'd have to cut back on her time now that Benson was on her about it. Chris came in and saw that Fin and Amanda were already at their desks. She went over to her desk and took off her coat, scarf, hat and gloves.

"Is there a blizzard out there or something?" Fin jokingly asked, noticing how bundled up she'd been.

"It's freezing out there" she groaned. "I don't know how you people do this for four months every winter season".

"You'll get used to it" Amanda said sitting down at her desk with her coffee. Chris looked at her, surprised that she'd said something to her. Last time she checked, they weren't speaking. Amanda gave her a soft smile and she returned it. Maybe they would work things out after all. A man named Larry Jones walked up to Amanda's desk. It appeared that she knew him. She introduced him as a someone she knew from back home. He asked for her help to find his missing nephew who'd been in the city for the weekend visiting Hudson on a recruitment trip. She explained the situation to Benson and promised she wouldn't put in for the time. She just wanted to do a favor for an old friend. When she got the go ahead she needed, she went with Fin to talk to the coach and some of the players to see about Cedric's whereabouts. The inquiry turned into a tentative investigation when there was suspicion that Cedric had been sexually assaulted as payback for committing to another school before coming to New York. Things spiraled out of control and Cedric attempted suicide because of fear that his assault, which was videotaped, would go viral. He survived but without a chance of ever playing football again. Amanda felt horrible about it. If she hadn't pushed and pushed for an investigation this never would've happened to Cedric; at least that's what she thought. They all tried to convince her that it wasn't her fault but she wasn't hearing any of it. There wasn't anything more she could do for Cedric except to find a way to charge everyone involved with his assault. After his suicide attempt, they found out that one of the hostesses who'd entertained Cedric was sent by the football coach to talk to him. That knowledge gave them just what they needed to put pressure on the players and the coach to get what they needed to bring charges. Amanda was able to send Larry off with the good news that they'd gotten the people involved in ruining his nephew's life. It was little consolation for Amanda but it was the best she could do.

Things were looking up for her on the gambling front. She hit a lucky streak and was able to pay Nate back what she owed him. She gave him the money after she had sex with him, not wanting him to think that the sex had anything to do with the money she owed. He wanted her to go to another meeting with him but she declined. She didn't want any more help from him. It had to be a clean break this time. She called them even and left him there in the office of his bar. On her way home, she got a call from Christina but she didn't answer. She wanted to talk to her but then again she didn't. She wasn't up for another one sided conversation, which is what conversations with Christina always were. Anyways, her life was a mess at the moment and from what she could tell Chris' wasn't any better. She needed some time to get herself together and evaluate what she wanted going forward. Until then, she was on her own; same as always.


	26. Chapter 26: Wake-Up Call

Chapter 26: Wake-Up Call

The next few days went by and Amanda was still distancing herself from Christina. They were both in their own worlds. She was trying to hide her gambling and Chris was trying to hide the fact that Franco was still in the city and wouldn't be leaving. He was still pestering her about leaving SVU and joining him in Narcotics. She kept saying no but that didn't stop him from asking her over and over. Beth was still trying to get back together with her. She'd made herself clear, with her words at least, that she didn't want to be in a relationship with her. Beth felt like her actions said otherwise. They went out to dinners, movies, art shows. Chris had even been Beth's date to an event at the museum. Beth wouldn't give up on the idea of them together. Chris hadn't given up on working things out with Amanda but it was hard to do seeing as how she wasn't speaking to her. It was the weekend and Amanda had time off. She locked up her weapon and got her things to head out. She said she was heading to Niagara Falls with Frannie but Chris wasn't convinced. She kept her mouth shut though and continued working on her paperwork so she could get out of there and go home. She overheard Nick being nosy, as usual, and then he and Amanda left the precinct together. She heard Olivia joke that she wished they'd "get a room already" and wondered if she'd noticed something going on between them that she hadn't. They had been particularly friendly working on the Jones case which was different for them given their past problems but she hadn't thought anything of it; until now.

Amanda didn't go out of town like she'd told her coworkers. Instead she went to an illegal gambling club. She played cards and smoked a couple cigarettes. This was her first time at this club and she'd already racked up a lot of debt. Like a true gambling addict, she kept playing to try to salvage her losses only to dig herself into a deeper and deeper hole. Then she laid eyes on someone she hadn't seen in months. It was Claire Wilson, a victim she'd helped. She was back to her old ways, waitressing in clubs. She knew the moment she laid eyes on her that it was time for her to go. She put out her cigarette and went to collect her money. She was stopped one her way out, escorted into the back office and held at gunpoint by club security; two men by the names of Declan and Carlos. The boss, a pregnant woman named Saundra, watched while they searched her for a wire. They made sure she wasn't undercover then informed her that she'd be working off her debt at the club. She had no idea how she was going to get out of this bind. She'd really stepped in it this time.

The next morning, Chris came in and Amanda was there sitting at one of the computers. She said good morning and went over to her desk. She didn't even ask what she was doing there. Turned out, she didn't have to. She overheard Nick being his naturally inquisitive self. Apparently, she never made it to Niagara Falls because Frannie got car sick and she was in checking tickets for a friend. Chris didn't know if all of it was true or only half but she knew something was off. She had a feeling she'd find out soon, one way or another. It was still her day off so she didn't stay long. Just got what she needed from the computer and left. The next day, Amanda didn't come in to work; something about having the flu. On their lunch break, Nick and Fin dragged her over to the apartment to check on her and give her soup. They knocked on the door for ten minutes but got no answer. Chris purposely didn't tell them that she still had a key. If Amanda didn't want to come in to work that was her choice. She was an adult. Everyone was entitled to play hooky at least once. They went back to the precinct where Amaro insisted on talking to Sergeant Benson about what he thought Rollins was up to. Her stomach did a back flip when she heard him say he'd tracked her cell and followed her. Fin seemed familiar with the news but it was the first she was hearing about it. _"Stalker much"_ she thought to herself. She could see that it didn't sit right with Benson either. She trusted that she'd address the issue. She told them she'd take care of it so she and Fin left her office while Amaro stayed and talked to the Sergeant a while longer. He didn't seem in the best of moods when he left her office so Chris assumed that Olivia had addressed the stalking thing. He probably didn't see it that way but that's definitely what he was doing. Chris considered calling Amanda but she decided against it. She'd probably just ignore her phone calls anyway. She finished out the rest of the day and got her things to head home. As she was walking to her car, Fin caught up with her in the parking lot.

"You talked to Amanda?" he asked. She shook her head.

"No. It's been a couple weeks since I talked to her….outside of work anyway". She knew he was worried that she'd started gambling again. So was she but Amanda didn't want to talk to her. There was no way she'd want her help.

"She hasn't told you anything?"

"We broke up" she reminded him.

"So you stop talking to her?" It was clear that he wasn't happy with her and how he thought she was treating his partner.

"She stopped talking to me" she said defensively. "I've called her. She won't answer my phone calls. What do you want me to do?"

"This is because you're seeing that Beth chick" he said accusingly.

"I'm not _seeing_ Beth" she quickly denied. "We're just friends".

"Yeah right" he said unconvinced. Chris scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Look, I don't have to take shit from you about this, ok?" she said annoyed. "She's the one ignoring me. Why don't you call her? Maybe she'll return your calls". She turned and walked the rest of the way to her car, got in it and headed home. Fin called Amanda and asked her to meet him later at their regular spot. A few hours later, he was sitting next to her at the bar. Their conversation confirmed that she was indeed gambling again and this time it could result in more trouble than she was able to get herself out of. She swore she had it under control but he wasn't so confident. He gave her money to help her out and made sure she knew that he was there if she needed him. He left her sitting at the bar not knowing that the people she was working for had been there the whole. She handed off the money to Declan and said that she was ready to be done with them. He said no and asked for another favor.

The next day, Amanda was out again. She had the evening shift which left her with half the day to do what she needed to do on that favor. It turned out that there was more they wanted from her so she'd be pulling a double. She went in for her shift which was pretty uneventful. Chris was debating whether to try to talk to her or just wait until Amanda wanted to talk to her again. Before she knew it was time for her to call it a night. She decided she'd take a chance that Amanda was in a weird mood like a couple weeks ago and would want to talk to her. Nick was doing his weird "I'm trying to be subtle about being in your business" routine but he wasn't really being subtle. She said she'd be sticking around for a while longer so Chris thought she'd wait for him to leave to ask her to talk. She didn't get the chance though. The phone rang and she volunteered to go out on a call since she'd been out the last few days. Fin went with her. Chris shut down her laptop, put her coat on, grabbed her keys and left the precinct behind them to go home.

The case they'd caught, the rape of a diplomat's wife, turned up more problems for Amanda than she'd anticipated. She did everything she could to keep her extra work under wraps. She went to the scene but her presence wasn't helping. The husband changed his story once he saw her and the victim refused to talk to her. When they got back to the precinct, she went through the surveillance videos fast enough to hide her own appearance on them from Fin. Then they got the call about the DNA they found on the victim. It turned out that the favor she'd done for Carlos to pay off her debt came back to bite her in the ass when it came back that he was their perp. They were planning to go pick him up when she made up an excuse about being tired from working so many hours. Fin sent her home and took Amaro instead. Only she didn't go home. She was pissed and confronted Saundra about putting her in a compromising position. Now she had to think of yet another way to dig herself out of yet another hole. She took a DNA swab from Carlos and took it to the lab as an elimination sample. Meanwhile, Amaro was at the evidence room checking out the surveillance footage, hoping to find whoever had taken a gun out of evidence which led to charges being dropped against their suspect. He saw Rollins on the video and took a copy back to the precinct with him to show Benson. They'd also found out about her trip to the diplomat's home and her taking in the elimination sample. Olivia told them to stop digging into Rollins' involvement in the case. It was her problem and she'd handle it. Fin didn't think it was all on her. He asked respectfully for permission to warn Amanda that they knew she was involved. He didn't want her to be blindsided. She agreed. They met her at a bar and let her know the situation. The walls were starting to crumble in on her and she knew she'd have to end this side work soon. She got Olivia to agree to let her turn herself in the next morning. When Fin left her at the bar she made some calls and told Saundra she needed to come in. Nick was on the other side of town, sticking his nose where it didn't belong. It seemed to be a character trait of his. He sucker punched Declan outside the club and threatened him to leave Rollins alone.

Not long after Amaro, Rollins was in that same part of town having a late meeting with Saundra and Declan. She was ending this once and for all. Her ass was on the line so she couldn't screw this up. She wasn't leaving without getting everything she needed. She had Saundra take her to her boss, demanding money and a flight out of the country. Saundra faked going into labor to distract her and Declan took this opportunity to gain control of the situation. He'd heard everything he needed to hear. He revealed his real identity as Lieutenant Declan Murphy and told them they were all under arrest. The next morning, he took care of Amanda for helping him out, making sure that she would keep her badge. He wished her good luck and went on his way. Amanda went back to the precinct to face the music.

Chris had the day before off so she had no idea what the hell was going on. From what she could tell from the conversation happening around her, Amanda had gone undercover and hadn't told anyone except Benson, which made sense. She had to inform her commanding officer. She didn't understand why Fin was so upset that she hadn't told him. He'd worked undercover before. He should understand. More than that, he should've been relieved. This whole time they thought she was throwing her career and her life down the drain but she was just on the job. Chris knew that however Amanda had gotten the undercover job wasn't on the up and up but she didn't care. She was just glad that it'd ended well. And if this wasn't a wake-up call for Amanda then nothing would be.

Amanda was still arguing with Fin about not telling him that she was undercover when Benson called her into her office. She got the truth out of her about how she'd ended up working at the gambling club and let her know she wasn't at all pleased with her behavior. She went so far as to threaten to transfer her. Amanda tried hard to control her emotions but she couldn't help the tear that escaped her eye. She knew she'd screwed up and that she'd have to regain Olivia's, and everyone else's, trust. She was glad that she had the chance to do so. She left her office and shut the door behind her, taking a minute to collect herself before going over to sit at her desk. Chris wanted to talk to her, make sure she was okay but it looked like she had a lot on her mind. She decided to give her some time to process and try to talk to her later. They worked quietly for the rest of the day, each taking their own time during lunch; all working through their own issues. It felt like they were at the bottom on the barrel. There wasn't any way to go but up.

After her shift ended, Amanda headed to a GA meeting. She was determined to get herself back on track. She couldn't afford to let her gambling ruin her life any more than it already had. She knew she wouldn't have any more chances. If she screwed up again, she was done. She could say goodbye to her career, her friends, her dog and probably say hello to a jail cell. She was more determined now than she'd ever been before to keep herself on the straight and narrow. She went to work every day and went to meetings and took care of Frannie. The job brought the same amount of stress but she was doing a better job of coping. She was slowly repairing her relationship with Christina. They weren't back together but they were talking more and she wasn't so angry about how things ended between them anymore. But Beth was still in the picture and Amanda wasn't sure she believed that they were just friends. They were in the middle of what was turning out to be a high profile case. The media involvement was negatively impacting the victim and Barba's ability to get an impartial jury. They went out for drinks to unwind after a tough day in court.

"They really went after her today" Chris said taking a drink from her beer.

"Yeah. The defense is exploiting the fact that, in the beginning, she lied" Amaro said.

"Jimmy Mac's coverage isn't helping any either" Amanda said obviously not happy with his involvement.

"So she lied" Chris said shrugging her shoulders. "The jury can't possibly dismiss those photos. It's obvious that she was attacked".

"Juries are never predictable, especially with defendants like these" Barba said chiming in.

"Defendants like what?" Chris turned around when she heard a familiar voice from behind her. Franco was there with a beer already in hand. He pulled a chair over and sat down next to Christina.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. Amanda was confused to see him there as well. She thought he'd already gone back to California.

"Came here for a drink with some of the guys" he said pointing out his drinking companions. "Saw you here; thought I'd come over and say hello".

"You didn't get enough of the city last time you visited?" Nick asked. He wondered if Chris ever told Amanda about the kiss she'd shared with Franco. Chris' uncomfortable body language told him she most likely hadn't.

"Chris didn't tell you guys?" he asked looking back and forth between him and Rollins. "I live here now" he said filling them in. "Took a job with Brooklyn narcotics". Amanda looked at Chris and she knew she was in big trouble. She hadn't told Amanda anything about Franco moving to New York or about what happened between them the night of the fight at the bar or about him offering her a job with him in narcotics.

"No. She didn't mention it" Amanda said still looking at Chris who was now avoiding eye contact with her. The mood had undeniably changed and there was an awkward silence between them. Amanda finished her beer and got up from the table. "I'm gonna head out. See y'all tomorrow". She grabbed her jacket and walked toward the door, putting on her jacket as she went.

"Amanda wait" Chris called after her. She gave Franco an unappreciative glare as she grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair.

"What?" he asked innocently. She rolled her eyes and headed out after Amanda. She didn't see her when she walked out of the bar. She was supposed to have given her a ride home so she knew she'd have to take the train instead. She put her jacket on and jogged in the direction of the nearest station and saw Amanda halfway down the block.

"Amanda" she called after her. She ignored her and kept walking so Chris jogged to catch up with her. "Amanda would you stop?"

"What?" she said finally stopping to talk to her. "What is it?"

"Why'd you leave like that?" she asked.

"Why does it matter?" she asked shrugging her shoulders.

"Amanda, come on, don't do this" she said softly. "Things have been getting better between us. I don't want that to change".

"Is that why you lied about Franco moving here?" she asked.

"I didn't lie" she said quickly.

"You didn't tell me. You hid it from me. That's the same thing". She started walking in the direction of the subway again. Chris groaned and followed after her.

"You weren't talking to me" she reminded. "What was I supposed to do?" Amanda ignored her and kept walking. This was just what Chris needed. Just as she was getting close to Amanda again Franco shows up and gets in the way. "Ok, I'm sorry. I should've told you as soon as I found out but I was….I was still processing it and then we broke up. Amanda…" she reached out and grabbed her arm to stop her. "I'm sorry. I just….I knew you wouldn't like it so I didn't say anything".

"I'm going home". She pulled out of her grasp and started to walk the rest of the way to the subway.

"Let me drive you" Chris stopping her from walking away. "Please". Without saying a word, she turned and started to walk back towards the bar towards Chris' car. Chris took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She hoped to use the drive over to Amanda's to continue talking about the situation with Franco. She didn't know whether or not to tell her about the kiss or the job offer but she didn't think it was a good idea to keep it from her either. She had the walk back to her car to figure it out.


	27. Chapter 27: Family Issues

Chapter 27: Family Issues

The drive to Amanda's turned out to be completely silent. Chris couldn't think of what to say to Amanda to explain herself. Amanda just stared out the window the entire way to her apartment. She wanted an explanation from Chris about what was going on not only with her and Franco but between her and Beth. She'd been thinking about them getting back together at some point and it definitely made her feel better that Chris wanted to get back together with her. She didn't know how much Chris knew about her recent gambling troubles but she knew that she would have nothing to do with her if she wasn't getting help for herself. Now that she was back in GA, she was reconsidering her decision to call it quits with Chris. But finding out about Franco moving to New York, presumably to be closer to Christina, had her rethinking her reconsiderations. Chris pulled up outside her building and parked her car. Amanda unbuckled her seat belt, thanked her for the ride home, and opened the door to get out of the car.

"Can I come up?" Chris asked. Amanda looked back at her and started to deny her request. "Just to talk" she added quickly. "Please".

"Fine" she said agreeing to let her come upstairs. Chris turned off the car and got out, shutting her door and hitting the locks before following Amanda inside her building. Frannie was excited to see Chris when she walked in the door. Chris kneeled down to pet her and scratch her behind the ears. She barked loudly and licked Chris' face. "Alright, Frannie Mae. Let her breathe" Amanda said pulling her by the collar so Chris could get up. She went over to the couch and Chris followed along with Frannie who jumped on the couch and sat in her lap when she took a seat on the couch. They sat quietly for a while then the silence became unbearable. "You said you wanted to talk so…." Amanda wanted Chris to say whatever was on her mind. She was so tired. She just wanted to curl up in bed with Frannie and go to sleep. Chris didn't know where to start so she said the first thing that came to mind.

"I know you've been gambling" she started when Amanda cut her off.

"I was undercover" she said quickly.

"Come on, Amanda. I'm not stupid" she said. "Anyway, I talked to Fin. He told me about the club that you were moonlighting at to pay off your debt". Amanda started to tell her that was just part of the job but Chris knew better. "I know the moonlighting was your front but I also know that you only got the job because you were in the club gambling". Amanda didn't know how Chris had figured that out. She hadn't even been at work when the worst of it came out. Then she remembered that Chris spent two years of her life undercover. She knew that no UC would let her blow a cover they'd worked so hard to build. They'd use her as an asset.

"Fine. I was gambling" she admitted. "That's how I got the job. I fell behind at the club and I…I just got lucky that security was UC. He pulled me in to work under him". She left out the part about almost giving a sexual favor to keep herself out of trouble. She didn't want Chris to know that she was in that deep. And she didn't want her to think less of her. "I'm back in the program now. I'm doing okay".

"I know you are" Chris said confidently. "I'm sorry. I was an asshole and I walked out on you. I shouldn't have done that".

"I didn't start gambling again because of you". Amanda didn't want her to feel responsible for her trouble.

"Oh, I know. I'm not so full of myself that I think you fell off the wagon because of me". Chris knew just about everything about addiction short of what it was like to have one of her own. She knew how much Amanda had gone through before they got together, almost all of it having to do with the job and her sister. Then she had to testify against Amaro in the grand jury, Captain Cragen left the squad, a victim was arrested while they were trying to help her, a witness murdered in protective custody and then a friend from her hometown comes to her for help and she ends up making everything worse. That amount of stress would push a lot of people with an addiction to the edge. Of course their relationship ending didn't help but Chris knew she was at the bottom of the list of things that drove Amanda back to gambling. She should've known that Amanda's sobriety wasn't going to last. She only stopped gambling because Chris asked her to for the Rankins case. The most important thing about sobriety was that a person had to want it just for them self, not anyone else. "But I still want to apologize to you…for how things ended. And I still want to work things out….if you want to".

"I'm really trying to focus on working my program right now" she said. "And Olivia's not happy with me. I have to gain her trust back an…"

"Ok" Chris said stopping her from going on. "You need to focus on you right now; not us. I get it".

"I'm not saying no" she said softening the rejection. "Just not now". Chris nodded her head.

"Ok". She debated whether or not it was a good time to tell her about the situation with Franco. The longer she went without telling her the worse it'd be. She decided it was now or never. "I should've told you about Franco the night I found out he was moving here. I just…I was having a hard time processing. So much happened that night and I was overwhelmed. I didn't handle it well". She was hoping that Amanda could see she was trying hard to communicate openly with her.

"I…I want to talk about this. I do but I'm…."

"Really tired" she said finishing her sentence. "I know. So am I". She gave Frannie's head one last rub and kissed her on the nose before gently pushing her off her lap and getting up from the couch. "I'll let you get to bed". Amanda got up from the couch and followed her to the door. Frannie barked and pulled on Chris' pant leg to stop her from leaving. Amanda thought it was funny that she didn't want her to leave. She'd never taken to anyone as well as she had to Chris. That was one of the reasons she wanted to try again with her. Frannie always was a good judge of character. She kept barking and pulling on her pant leg, keeping her from getting out the door.

"Hush Frannie Mae" Amanda said firmly. "Bed". She whined and went into the apartment, presumably to bed as Amanda had commanded. They said good night and Chris headed out to go home. Amanda locked up and went to bed, taking Frannie with her to cuddle. The next day, Jimmy Mac ran a story in his paper about the trial, mainly about the defendants. It turned out that half the jury read it and the judge declared a mistrial. Instead of going to a second trial, they made a deal with the more prominent rapist. He would have a record and go on the sex offender registry but wouldn't be doing jail time on the agreement that he testify against his codefendant. Rollins and Amaro visited Heba, the victim in the case, to explain the deal to her and found out it was all part of a settlement that would pay for her brother's education. She'd have to live the fact that her brother going to school was more important than her getting the justice she deserved.

The next few weeks went by and Amanda and Chris hadn't had a chance to finish their conversation. They'd started new cases and Chris had been out of the precinct for a few days dealing with family issues. They had brief phone conversations but nothing serious since that night at Amanda's apartment. When she came back, they were working on the case of a young woman named Jenny who was used in a series of child pornography videos when she was a little girl. It'd all started with her daughter, Maddie, whom she'd left home alone in her apartment for two days. When they questioned her, she informed them that she couldn't leave the girl with her ex-husband because it was dangerous. Their investigation led them to videos made by her step-father in which she's portrayed as a girl named Laci. She was so traumatized by her childhood experience that she'd repressed the memory and didn't believe that she, herself, was Laci. Benson and Rollins had the tough job of telling her that not only was she Laci but the videos had been shown and sold all over the internet.

Over the next few days, they worked with Jenny to get compensation for all she'd been through. She was able to take one man to court for buying the videos of her. When she found out how many times the videos had been bought and shared on the net, she couldn't bear the thought of having to go to court every time they arrested someone. She didn't want to be dealing with being Laci for the rest of her life. Luckily, Barba found a way for her to get compensation immediately without ever having to go to court again. Jenny got custody of Maddie back, counseling for herself and her daughter, and money to take care of them for a very, very long time. They were all pleased with how the case ended. All they had left was paper work. Chris was pulling a double because of the time she'd taken off. Nick and Amanda took off and Fin came in for his night shift. After a couple more hours, Sergeant Benson cut out as well. Chris decided not to go home once her shift was over. At three in the morning, she got up from her desk to catch a couple hours of sleep in the crib, showered, changed her clothes and was back at her desk by seven thirty. She called her brother to make sure he set out their mother's medication for her. He didn't answer so she called her dad. He didn't answer either. She left messages on both their voicemails and went to get herself some coffee.

Amanda and Nick came in together at the same time that morning. She found it a little odd but she let herself think it was just a coincidence. She kept checking her phone to see if Robbie or her father sent her any texts but there was nothing. She called home but her mother didn't answer the phone. She knew if she were home, she would've answered so she assumed she went out for errands or something. It was a quiet day so far and she was more than ready to get out there. She was about to cut out for lunch when her phone started ringing. It was Robbie finally returning her call.

"Hey, what took you so long to call back?" she asked not even saying hello. "Did ma get her pills last night and this morning?" She listened to him on the other end for a moment. "What?" she yelled into the speaker. The entire squad room quieted down and all eyes were on her. "Why not?" She started shutting down her computer and packing up her things as she talked on the phone. Olivia came out of her office when she heard the yelling from the bull pen. "One thing, Robbie. I asked you to do one fucking thing! Why are you just now calling me?" They could all tell that it was something serious. Probably something to do the family problems she'd needed to take time off for. "Where, Robbie? Where?" She listened for another minute before saying she was on her way and hanging up the phone. She grabbed her bag and turned to go talk to Sergeant Benson only to find she was already standing there.

"What's going on?" she asked concerned.

"It's my mother. She's back in the hospital. I know I just took time off but I…."

"It's your family" she said cutting her off. "Go". Chris didn't waste any time arguing. She headed for the door.

"You want some company?" Amanda asked getting up from her desk. She was happy to be there for Christina if she needed her. Chris paused at the door and thought about whether she wanted Amanda with her or not. On one hand, it was nice to know she wanted to support her. On the other hand, she tended to get emotional about her mother and she didn't know if she wanted Amanda to see her like that.

"Ummm, no" she said after some thought. "Thanks but I'll be okay". Amanda nodded and sat back down at her desk. Chris walked out of the squad room and headed for the elevator. She started to think that this was exactly what Amanda meant when she said she was emotionally stifled. She never let anyone see her vulnerable. If she wanted things to work between them, she'd have to change that. She turned back around and went back to the squad room. "Amanda" she called for her from just outside the squad room doors. She was having trouble actually getting the words out of her mouth but she didn't have to say anything. Amanda got up from her desk, put on her jacket and left with Chris to go see her mother at the hospital.

They arrived at Saint Catherine's and found Chris' family in the waiting room. She rushed over to them and asked how was she doing but they said the doctor hadn't told them anything yet. She'd started complaining about her chest hurting around ten am. They realized she hadn't taken her meds the night before or that morning. They gave her the pills but the pain was steadily getting worse so they brought her to the hospital. Amanda sat next to Chris, not saying anything; just there for support.

"Dad" she said trying to get his attention. He was sitting next to her with his head in his hands. "Papa" she said touching his shoulder. He lifted his head to look at her. "You doing okay?"

"I'm fine, mija" he said softly. She knew that, no matter what he said, he wasn't fine. He was just as worried as she was, maybe more.

"Don't stress, okay" she whispered. She rubbed his back in soothing circle. "It's no…."

"Not good for my heart" he said knowing what she was about to say. "I know mi niña". She sighed and sat back in her chair, letting her head fall back against the wall. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths to calm herself down.

"Chris". She opened her eyes when she heard her brother say her name. "The doctor's here". She quickly got up from her seat and went over to talk to the doctor.

"You're here for Gloria Reyes?" she asked.

"Yes. I'm here daughter. How's she doing?" she asked nervously.

"Does your mother have a history of heart problems?" she asked, ignoring her question.

"Ummm, yeah. She had a heart attack about a year and a half ago. And some chest pains about three months ago. They monitored her for a couple days, changed her meds and sent her home. She's been doing better".

"Well, the meds were just a temporary fix to a growing problem. You mother has dilated cardiomyopathy. In laymen's terms, her heart was weakened by the heart attack. It's having a hard time pumping blood to the rest of her body" she said explaining the condition. "Each time it fills with blood, less and less is pumped back out. Eventually it won't be able to pump at all".

"So what can you do? How can you fix it?"

"I'm afraid it can't be fixed. There's nothing more we can do". She had little emotion in her voice. Chris thought she must give bad news dozens of times a day. "Your mother's heart is useless. We can give her medications to slow down the process but, like before, that's a temporary fix. She'll last a couple months, if that. If she doesn't get a transplant, she'll die". Chris ran her hands through her hair and took a deep breath to collect herself.

"Ok" she said. She swallowed down every emotion threatening to come up. She had to keep it together for her family. They were looking to her to make the decisions. "Then, let's do the transplant. How….how do we make that happen".

"Well first we ask her a series of questions, ascertain if she's a good candidate. Then we get her on the donor list".

"What kind of questions?"

"Family history, her own personal medical history, substance abuse". Chris tried not to check out as she rattled off a list of things they had to check for. "Alcohol consumption, eating habits, other underlying medical problems that could possibly increase the risk of rejection or affect the health of the donor heart later on. Do you need time to talk this over with your family?" she asked looking at her father and sibling who were staring at them from their seats. She shook her head.

"No" she answered, "Do what you have to do. I want my mother on the donor list". She nodded her head then walked back in the direction he came from. Chris went over and sat back down next to her father. Her brother and sister sat across from and leaned forward to hear what she was going to say. Amanda wondered if she should step away and give them some privacy. She was about to get up and leave them to talk when Chris reached over and took her hand, silently asking her to stay. "Ummm….it's not great news" she said starting to explain. "He said that her heart is really weak from the heart attack and that it's only going to get worse. She….needs a heart transplant or she's not gonna make it". Chris took her father's hand when he started to cry. Jeza had tears rolling down her cheeks and Robbie sat with his head in his hands. "So that's what we're gonna try to do" she said continuing to tell them what the plan was. "We're gonna try the heart transplant".

"This is my fault" Robbie said sitting up in his chair. "I forgot to give her her meds. I'm just so used to you doing it, I forgot".

"No, Robbie. The doctor said that this is nothing that her medication could've stopped or fixed" she said trying to assuage his guilt.

"So then it's my fault" Jeza said still crying. "I stressed her out so much that she had a heart attack. Now she's gonna die".

"That's not true" Chris said quickly. "This is no one's fault" she said despite her own feelings of guilt. "It's just something that happened. But it doesn't matter now. We just have to be there for mami; help her through this". Her father was still crying as he held on to her hand. She didn't know how she'd calm him down. She didn't know what she'd do if her mother didn't make it. It wasn't something she even wanted to think about. Right now she needed to focus on being strong and holding it together for her family.


	28. Chapter 28: Cracked Armor

Chapter 28: Cracked Armor

The waiting room at Saint Catherine's was cold and the chairs weren't very comfortable. But the comfort of the waiting room was the last thing on their minds. The possibility of their wife or mother dying was still fresh. Chris was doing a good job as always, holding it together while everyone around her broke down. She'd calmed her father down and got her sister to stop crying. She tried to calm Robbie's anger but she knew that was a lost cause. They all just sat patiently waiting for the doctor or a nurse to come out and tell them they could go see her. They sat in the waiting room a little longer before Chris told Amanda she could go.

"You can't do much. We're just sitting here" she said softly. She hadn't let go of Amanda's hand for even a second since she grabbed ahold of it.

"I don't mind staying".

"It's ok. I'll be fine" she said declining. "You should go back to work. I'll call you if…..anything changes".

"Ok" she said softly. She gave her hand a small squeeze before letting go and getting up to leave.

"Hey, can you fill the sergeant in on what's happening?" she asked. Amanda smiled and nodded then turned to leave. She stopped for a sandwich to eat at her desk then made her way back to the precinct. Benson saw her when she walked in and came out of her office to ask her about how things had gone at the hospital.

"It's not good" she said shrugging out of her jacket. "You guys know she had a heart attack a while ago". They all nodded their heads. "Well, it did more permanent damage than they thought. There's nothing else they can do to fix it. She needs a heart transplant".

"How'd she take it?" Fin asked.

"You know Chris" she said taking a seat at her desk. "She's holding it together for her dad and her brother and sister".

"It's not good for her" Olivia said shaking her head. "Holding things in like that. Sooner or later she's gonna lose it".

"There anything we can do?" Amaro asked. She shook her head.

"No. She said she'd call if anything changed". Benson nodded then left to get back to work. Amanda opened her sandwich and took a bite while she waited for her laptop to start up. Fin and Nick got back to their paperwork. They worked the rest of their shift and packed up to go home. Amanda called Chris to ask if she was still at the hospital. She wasn't. She'd left to take her father home to get some rest. Her brother and sister stayed at the hospital with their mom. She asked her if she wanted her to come over and, of course, she said no. Amanda drove over there anyway and went up to knock on the door. Chris was surprised to her there.

"I said you didn't have to come" she said.

"I know". Chris stepped to the side and let her in the house. She shut and locked the door behind her then walked past her back to the kitchen. Amanda followed close behind her. "How's your mom doing?" she asked.

"Seems okay to me" she said putting on an oven mitt. She grabbed an iron kettle from the stove and poured hot water into a glass. "She was sitting up, talking, laughing. Doesn't seem sick at all". She put a tea bag into the water and let it sit. "She doesn't want the transplant" she said softly. "She's worried about how much it'll cost and what a waste it'll be if….if the transplant doesn't work". Amanda could tell that it was hard for her think about. "She doesn't want to burden me anymore" she said sadly. "I can't tell my father. He's falling apart with her just being sick. He knows she'll die without the transplant. If I tell him she doesn't want it, it'll kill him". Amanda didn't know what to say. She was sure nothing she could think of would make Chris feel better. She stepped forward and tried to hug her but she immediately pulled away. "No, don't" she said rejecting the embrace. "I'm….I'm okay". She took a deep breath to collect herself then picked up the cup of tea from the counter. "I need to take this up to my dad". Amanda put her hands on the counter behind her and leaned back against it. Chris left her alone in the kitchen inwardly kicking herself for pushing Amanda away. But she knew that if she let her hug her, she'd break down. She wasn't ready for Amanda to see her like that. She gave her father his tea and made sure he was resting comfortably then went back downstairs. Amanda was standing on the landing, leaning against the door. "Amanda, I…"

"You don't have to apologize" she said. "I understand you need to keep it together right now. This, your tough exterior, it won't last much longer". She opened the door to leave, "When ready for that to come down, give me a call". She gave a kiss on the cheek and walked out the door. Chris knew that Amanda was right. She could feel herself falling apart, feel large pieces of the armor she'd spent so many years building up crack all around her. It was only a matter of time before it completely shattered. She watched Amanda to her truck then closed and locked the door behind her, took a moment to gather herself then went to get her phone. She called Saint Catherine's and was put through to her mother's room. Robbie answered the phone and told her how their mother was doing. Nothing had changed. She wasn't getting better but she hadn't gotten any worse either. She was asleep now. He offered to wake her but she told him not to. She'd need all of her rest. She told him to get Jeza and come home. It was getting late and they needed to get to bed. She had school in the morning and he had to go to work. He argued, saying they should be able to take a day off. But if their mother was going to have the transplant, they needed to get all the hours at work they could and save every penny. She'd talked to the insurance company and they wouldn't cover the full cost of the procedure. She'd been under the impression that her father had full benefits from work that would cover any medical problems that came up. He'd lost it when he took time off to take care of her mother when she'd been undercover with Amanda. Just one more failure she could add to the list. Even though her mother said she didn't want the transplant, she was hoping to change her mind. They needed to be prepared if she was successful.

"We all have to do this together, Robbie. I can't afford this on my own". He relented and said they'd be home soon. She went back upstairs and went to the bathroom to run a hot bath. She stripped out her clothes, let down her hair and stepped into the hot water. She sank down into the water, submerging herself completely. She held her breath for as long as she could stand the feeling of her lungs screaming for air. When she sat up, allowing herself air, she heard the front door open and shut again. There were footsteps on the stairs and down the hall before there was a knock on the bathroom door.

"We're home" Robbie said through the door. "Going to bed".

"Good night" she said tiredly. He went to his bedroom and shut the door. She stayed in the bathtub for an hour, thinking of how things would be without her mother. She couldn't force her to have the transplant if she didn't want it. She could try all she wanted to change her mind but deep down she knew it wouldn't help. She got her strong will and her stubbornness from her mother. She knew her mind was made up and there was no changing it. She'd have to find a way to go on without her. They all would.


	29. Chapter 29: I Need to be Here

The next morning, Chris' father woke her up early to get ready for work. He was already dressed and making breakfast. When she asked him why he'd woken her up so early he said it was because he wanted her to drop him at the hospital. He didn't want her to be late so he woke her up early. She didn't argue with what he wanted. She'd do whatever it took to make sure that he was in a good mood. She got dressed and sat down to breakfast with him. Twenty minutes later they were out the door. She dropped him at Saint Catherine's and told him to call her if he needed anything. On her way to the precinct, she called her brother to make sure he was up getting ready for work and that he'd woken Jeza to get ready for school. She really hoped that her mom being sick would push Jeza to get her act together instead of backfiring into her acting out even more than before. She walked into the precinct, surprising everyone with her presence. She went right to her desk ignoring the stares she was getting from her fellow officers. Olivia saw her through her office window when she walked over to get coffee. She got off her phone call and came out of her office to talk to her.

"Reyes, what are you doing here?" she asked.

"I work here" she said. Her voice was low and laced with exhaustion.

"Go home" she directed. "Rollins told me what's going on with your mother. We can handle things here. You should go be with your family".

"No, I'm fine" she said declining the time off. "My brother's at work, my sister's at school, and my father's at the hospital with my mother. I want to be here". Benson could tell there was no sense in arguing with her. She understood how she felt. After her mother died, she just wanted to get back to work. It was better than sitting at home alone. Sometimes you just have to work through the pain.

"Ok". She turned and went back to her office and Chris went over to her desk with her coffee. They were working quietly for the most part. None of them knew if they should say anything or what they should say if they did. Nick's desk phone rang and he answered, writing down the information being given to him by whoever was on the other end. It was a call about a school reporting suspicion of child abuse. They were taking the child to the emergency room and wanted them to meet them at the hospital. Amanda volunteered to go with him but Chris said no.

"I got it" she said getting up from her desk. She put on her jacket and grabbed her coffee. She could tell that Amanda wasn't sure about her working right now. "I'm fine" she said quietly before walking out of the squad room towards the elevators. Nick let out a hard sigh then followed her out to go check out the complaint. They were silent on the drive over. Chris just stared out the window and Nick focused on the road. He took a few glances in her direction and she seemed to be in her own world. He thought the Sergeant should've sent her home. There was no way she could be focused on the job if she was worrying about her sick mother. He put that thought in the back of his mind to talk to Benson about later. He pulled up outside the hospital and found a place to park. They went in and went to the front desk, showed their badges and were escorted to the exam room with the child. The doctor had already completed his exam and the girl's parents, Karin and Steven Manning, were already in the room. Nick took it upon himself to separate the parents from their child to ask them questions, giving Chris some privacy to talk with the little girl. She grabbed the doctor's chair and rolled it over next to the bed and sat down.

"Hi" she said nicely. The girl was six years old and she looked terrified. Her knees were pulled into her chest and she'd pulled the blanket up to cover her body and half of her face. "My name is Christina. Can you tell me your name?"

"Abigail" she whispered.

"Abigail" she repeated, "That's a beautiful name".

"Thank you" she said still whispering. Chris smiled at her politeness.

"You're welcome". She paused for a moment to think about how to ask her about what happened. She didn't want to rush into things. She wanted to make her feel safe. "Hey, can I show you something?" she asked. Abigail nodded her head but kept the blanket up. Chris unclipped her badge from her hip and held it up for her to see. "This is my badge. Go on, you can take it". Abigail let the blanket fall down and reached out to take the badge from Chris. "I wear that every day to work. You know what it means?"

"You're a policewoman" Abigail said, her voice a louder this time.

"That's right. And do you know what police do?" Abigail nodded her head.

"They help people" she said.

"Yeah. And that's why I'm here right now. I'm here to help you. Ok?" She asked partly because she wanted to make sure they were on the same page and partly to ask Abigail permission to stay in the room with her.

"Ok" she said softly. She held onto her badge, caressing the bumps and grooves in the design with her fingers.

"Ok, good" Chris said with a smile. "So you went to school today, huh?" Abigail nodded her head as she continued to play with Chris' badge. "You like school?" She nodded her head again. "What's your favorite class?"

"Recess" she said confidently. Christina laughed.

"Recess isn't a class" she teased. Abigail giggled and nodded her head.

"Uh huh" she argued. "Ms. Shannon uses it to teach us lessons but they're games so it's still fun".

"Well you must be really smart to figure that out. Ms. Shannon didn't trick you with her fun games, huh?" Abigail giggled again and shook her head from side to side. Chris' smile faded and she knew she had to get to the serious part of the conversation. "Abigail, did you get hurt today at recess?" she asked nicely. The little girl shook her head. "Ms. Shannon said she saw bruises on your legs. Can you tell me how you got those bruises?"

"I fell down" she said. Her smile was gone and her voice was timid again.

"When did you fall down?"

"I don't remember" she said softly.

"Ok. Do you remember where you fell?" she asked. The girl shook her head from side to side, her eyes fixated on the badge in her hands. Chris didn't want to upset her but she knew she'd have to push a little harder to get the truth from the girl. "Abigail, you remember what my badge means, right?" She nodded.

"You're here to help me" she whispered.

"That's right" Chris said bringing her hands up to cover the little girl's. "I'm here to help you, but I can't help you unless you tell me the truth". She paused and waited for her to say something. "Honey, can you tell me what happened?"

"The man was mean to me" she whined. Chris could see the tears threatening to spill from her eyes.

"The man; what man?"

"He cleans things at school" she said. Chris understood that she meant a janitor.

"This man that cleans things at your school, can you tell me how he was mean to you?" Her voice was soft and caring, just like she'd seen from Sergeant Benson and Rollins when they talked to child victims.

"He pushed me down and…." She paused and looked down at her hands.

"It's okay. Go on" Chris encouraged her.

"He touched me" she said, her tears finally spilling over. "He said if I told he'd hurt my mommy and daddy. Please don't let him hurt my mommy and daddy" she begged. Chris got up from the chair and sat on the bed next to the little girl and pulled her into a hug.

"I won't let him hurt anyone else" she said as she soothed her. "I promise". Abigail cried for a few minutes longer before asking for her mother. Chris went out of the exam and found her parents with Amaro. "She's asking for you" she said looking at her mother. She rushed away from them to go be with her daughter. Chris stared after her, remembering what it was like to be a little girl crying for her mother. She remembered her mother's warm embrace and how it could fix almost anything. She was in such a trance that she didn't realize that Abigail's father had asked her a question. "I'm sorry, what?" she asked turning back to look at him.

"Did my daughter tell you what happened to her?" he asked, obviously frustrated. He'd been standing in the hallway with Amaro arguing about why he couldn't be in the room with his daughter. He was tired of waiting for answers.

"Yes, she did" she said. "Has your daughter ever come home complaining about…..ummm…being bothered by anyone at school?"

"What do you mean? Like is she bullied?" he asked confused.

"Does she come home with any complaints?" she asked, not making her question any more specific.

"No. She loved school. She has friends there and she loves her teacher. She looked forward to going everyday" he answered.

"Loved?" Chris asked.

"What?"

"You said she "loved" school and she "looked" forward to it" she said quoting him. "You used the past tense" she pointed out. "When did she stop wanting to go to school?"

"I guess, ummm, two days ago" he said. "She asked if she could stay home because she felt sick. My wife checked her temperature and she was fine so we made her go" he explained. "We always ask her how her day was at school and she didn't complain about anything. Then yesterday at bath time, Karin saw the bruise on her leg. She asked her what happened and Abby said she fell down on the playground at recess. She's a kid. Kids fall down, they get bruises all of the time".

"You didn't see how bad it'd gotten?" Amaro said. The doctor had shown him photos of the girl's bruises and they looked pretty severe to him to have happened on the playground.

"No. Abby, she's going through this independent stage. She wants to do everything on her own. My wife thought it was time to let her start picking her own clothes and dressing herself" he explained. "When she came down to breakfast this morning, she already had her clothes on. She didn't say anything about it hurting. I honestly….I'd forgotten about it" he said sounding a bit ashamed. "Did someone hurt her?" he asked. "Did someone at school hurt my baby?"

"Abigail told me that a man at school, a janitor, pushed her down…and touched her" Chris said hesitantly. Mr. Manning covered his mouth with his hand and tears sprang to his eyes. "I know this is hard to hear but you need to keep it together for your daughter. She'll only be afraid if you show her that you are".

"What are you saying? That I don't have a right to be upset?" he asked angrily. He took a forceful step forward toward Chris that made both her and Amaro uncomfortable.

"That's not what she's saying at all, Mr. Manning" Nick said stepping forward to stop his advance. "You can take all the time you need. Let out your anger and frustration where your daughter can't see you. She's gonna need to see both her parents strong. She's gonna need all your support. This is about her, not you" he said sternly. He took deep breaths to calm himself and wiped the tears from his eyes. Chris explained that he'd need to come down to the precinct with his daughter once the doctor released her. He nodded his understanding. Once he'd gained his composure, he went into the exam room to be with his wife and daughter.

"So that's all you got?" Amaro asked. "He touched her?" Chris nodded her head. "You didn't get any more detail? A name, description of the perp, anything?"

"No" she said simply. "It was hard to get that much out of her. She broke down and started asking for her mother". She could tell that Amaro thought she hadn't gotten enough information from the girl but she'd done the best she could. She thought it was best to give her some time and try getting more information from her later. They left the hospital and returned to the precinct. It was just about lunch time and Amanda and Fin were ordering in. Amanda came over to Chris' desk and asked her what she wanted. "I'm not hungry" she said declining her offer to get something for her.

"Come on, you need to eat" she argued.

"I'm really, I'm just not hungry" she said again. She picked up her desk phone and called the hospital to talk to her father. "¿Cómo está que ella?" She ignored Amanda standing there and talked to her father on the phone. Amanda went back to her desk and Nick took this time to go talk to the Sergeant about his concerns about Reyes working. He knocked on the door and she told him to come in. He shut the door behind him and got right to the point.

"I don't think Reyes should be working right now" he said bluntly.

"I see" Olivia said seated behind her desk.

"I know you okayed her to stay but I…."

"Did she screw something up on the complaint you went out on" she asked interrupting him.

"She didn't question the victim thoroughly. I mean, all she got was that a janitor pushed the girl and I guess touched her inappropriately. Nothing to really move forward on" he explained. "She said the girl shut down, which usually I'd get, but she barely said anything. I just….she's not all there. Her mind is with her mom. I get that. If my mother was in the hospital, I'd want to be with her too. It's obvious that she's got other thing going on. She's not focused" he criticized. "I just don't want her personal issues to jeopardize the case, that's all".

"Okay" Olivia said, completely understanding of what Nick was saying. "I'll talk to her". He nodded his head and went back out to the squad room. Chris had finished her phone call and was gone from her desk. Benson came to her office doorway and asked where Reyes had gone.

"Bathroom" Fin said. She told them to send her in her office when she came back. Fin looked accusing at Amaro, knowing that Benson wanting to talk to Reyes had something to do with what he'd just said in there. He shook his head then turned back to his desk. When Chris came back from the bathroom she didn't even have a chance to sit down.

"The Sarg wants to see you" Nick said pointing over his shoulder to Benson's office. She went to her office and knocked on the open door. Olivia told her to come in and shut the door behind her.

"I'm sending you home" she said not wasting any time.

"Why?" Chris asked angrily.

"I just want you to focus on your family" she said.

"Did Amaro say something to you?" she asked. She knew he had a problem with her being there. She wasn't an idiot. She got that he was being critical of the job she did with the victim when he questioned her about the amount of information she was able to get out of her. "Did he tell you I shouldn't be here?" Olivia paused for a bit longer than she should have. "He did, didn't he?"

"Yes, but that's not the only reason I'm sending you home" she said quickly. "I was hesitant to let you stay in the first place. Your mom is sick. You should go be with her".

"She's in the hospital with people that can help her. I can't do anything there but sit and watch her die" she said slightly yelling. She took a deep breath to calm herself. "I can't sit at the hospital all day. I can't sit at home at all day. I want to be here. I _need_ to be here" she said. "This little girl, Abigail, her parents are bringing her here as soon as she's released by her doctor. She trusts me. I can talk to her". She looked her in the eye hoping she'd see how badly she wanted to stay. "Don't send me home".

"Fine" Benson said giving in, "But I want you focused". Chris nodded her head in agreement then left the office and went back to her desk. Nick seemed surprised that she wasn't packing her stuff up to go home. She could've gloated but she didn't. The delivery man came in with their food and Amanda and Fin split the cost. Amanda came over to Chris' desk and sat down a small box and a fork.

"You need to eat" she said before going over to her desk and sitting down with her own food. Chris opened the box and smiled when she that Amanda ordered her Chinese just the way she liked it: vegetable lo mien with no egg and extra onion. She looked up and saw her looking over at her. She smiled and mouthed her thanks. When she turned back to her food, she felt Amaro's eyes on her and when she looked up at him she could swear she saw jealousy. It wouldn't surprise her if he had a thing for Amanda. He'd been much too interested in what was going on in her life lately for it to be anything else. She wasn't in any position to stake her claim or mark her territory or any of the other things men seemed to do when they felt something belonged to them. She had a lot to deal with before she was in any position to be in a relationship but she'd already made up her mind that she'd win Amanda back, no matter how long it took. She definitely wasn't going to let some little crush Amaro had stop her.

**Spanish-English Translations**

**¿Cómo está que ella?- **How is she doing?


	30. Chapter 30: Do Not Resuscitate

**AN: Hey all. So it's been a really long time since I updated this story. I apologize. I've been super busy but I haven't forgotten about it. There is more drama to come for Chris and her family as well as with Chris and Amanda. You'll have to keep reading to find out what the drama is. As always, please leave your feed back. It's much appreciated. **

Chapter 30: Do Not Resuscitate

Over the next couple days, they made an arrest in the Manning case. Barba was nervous about putting the little girl on the stand. She was just old enough to be sworn in but she was fragile. He didn't want her falling apart in front of the jury but he didn't have a choice. He needed her testimony. Chris was there with him when he prepped her, making sure she'd be ready when it was her turn to take the stand. She was as focused on work as she could be with her mom still in the hospital and still refusing the heart transplant she needed to save her life. She still hadn't told her father that her mother didn't want the surgery. He thought that his wife was already on the donor list waiting for an available organ. She knew she'd have to tell him soon but she was still hoping to change her mother's mind.

It was Abigail's day to testify in court and Chris had promised her she'd be there. They'd waited for as long as they could but the judge wouldn't wait any longer. She would have to go on without her being there. She'd taken a long lunch and was at the hospital visiting her mother. She'd just had a talk with the doctor and it wasn't good. Her mother's heart was getting worse and she was now refusing the drugs she needed to keep her in stable condition and reduce the risk of infections. She'd been sleeping more and more and the doctor said it wouldn't be long until she'd go to sleep and wouldn't wake up. It was time to start making preparations for her. He handed her some papers, including a do not resuscitate order, and told her to look them over and sign them when she was ready. With her mother refusing treatment, there wasn't much they could do except make her comfortable in her final days. She was pressed for time left with her mother and time to tell her family that the transplant wouldn't be happening. She knew that talk wouldn't go well. With all of that on her mind, she'd completely lost track of time. It was thirty minutes past the time that Abigail was scheduled to take the stand when she finally looked at her watch. Luckily her dad and brother got there and she was able to leave.

"Abigail, I know this is difficult and a little scary for you but I need you tell the jury how you got hurt at school" Barba said as gently as possible. Without Reyes there, getting information out of the six year old was like pulling teeth. She looked at him, then at the people in the jury, then briefly at the defense table, clearly scared out of her wits to be sitting up there with all of those people staring at her. "Abby" Barba said getting her to look at him. "Can you tell the jury how you got hurt at school?" The door opened and Chris slipped quietly into the courtroom. She saw Amanda and Fin sitting in the front row. Olivia and Nick sat behind them. She walked up quietly and sat down next to Fin. A wave of relief washed over Barba when he saw her walk in and take her seat. Abigail smiled and waved at her. She returned the smile and waved back. Barba turned back to his witness. "Now, Abby, can you tell the jury what happened?"

"It was recess and I had to go to the restroom" she started, sounding more confident now that Chris was there. "I went inside and the man was in there. He was cleaning. He wasn't nice to me".

"How? How was he not nice to you?"

"He wouldn't let me go to the restroom. He got mad that I had dirt on my shoes from the playground. He yelled at me and then he pushed me down".

"What happened next Abby?"

"He touched me" she said softly. "Mommy said that's my private place where no one's allowed to touch so I yelled at him to stop it".

"What did the man do next?"

"He hit me. He got madder because I cried. He put his hand over my mouth and said if I told anyone he'd hurt my mommy and daddy".

"Abigail, is the man who hurt you in this courtroom right now?"

"Yes" she said timidly.

"Can you point him out for the jury?" She lifted her hand form her lap and pointed at the defendant. "Thank you, Abby. You've been very brave. I have no further questions your honor". Barba turned and went to his seat. His nerves hadn't subsided yet. Abby still had to make it through her cross examination. He hoped that she would remember to do it just like they'd practiced.

"Hi Abigail" the defense attorney said as he approached her. He was a public defender named Ben Holder, nobody they'd ever seen before so they couldn't predict how he'd treat her on the stand. She was only six years old but that didn't mean he wouldn't go after her in attempts to discredit her testimony.

"Hi" she said back.

"Mr. Barba is right. You have been very brave up there".

"Thank you".

"You're welcome". He turned to look at Barba then glanced at Reyes before turning back to Abigail. "You must've had some help getting ready for today, right?"

"Yes".

"Who helped you?"

"Mr. Barba" she answered.

"Um hum. Anyone else?"

"Christina" she said with a soft smile.

"Christina" he repeated. "You mean Detective Reyes?" he asked pointing Chris out for the jury.

"Yes. She's my friend" Abby said happily. Chris smiled.

"That's very nice" he said pacing in front of the jury box. "And how did Mr. Barba and Detective Reyes help you get ready for today?"

"We practiced. Mr. Barba asked me questions and I answered. I got to sit in the judge's chair" she bragged.

"That must've been fun". Abby nodded. "How did Detective Reyes help you prepare for today?"

"She was there when we practiced. She said I did a good job".

"Did you practice with Detective Reyes what you were going to say today?"

"No. I practiced with Mr. Barba" she answered.

"Did Detective Reyes tell you anything about what to say while you're on the witness stand?" he asked. Barba knew that he was trying to confuse the girl into saying that she'd been fed her testimony but he wasn't worried. They'd done everything by the book and this bastard was going down.

"Yes". Barba sat up in his chair when he heard her answer. He looked over his shoulder at Chris who didn't may him any mind. She hadn't told Abby anything that would affect the case.

"She did?" he asked pretending to be surprised by her answer. "What did she tell you?"

"She said to tell everything that happened and to not be scared. It would go just like I practiced with Mr. Barba and…." She paused trying to remember exactly what Chris had told her. "And as long as I tell the truth everything will be ok". Barba relaxed in his chair again.

"You know what it means to tell the truth and to tell a lie, Abigail?" he asked.

"Objection" Barba said standing from his seat. "The witness' ability to tell the difference between a truth and a lie was established at the swearibility hearing, your honor".

"It was. Objection sustained" she said looking at Mr. Holder before turning to Abigail. "You don't have to answer that sweetheart".

"You wouldn't tell a lie would you Abigail?" he asked, moving along with his questions.

"No" she said softly.

"But you did lie to your mom and dad, didn't you?" Abigail looked confused by his question. "You told them that you were hurt in an accident on the playground, didn't you?"

"Yes" she said sadly.

"So which is it, Abigail. Did you get hurt on the playground or did my client hurt you?"

"He did" she said.

"Then why did you lie to your parents when they asked how you were hurt?"

"He said he would hurt them if I told". Tears were started to form in her eyes and she was starting to fall apart. Barba knew he had to get her off the stand.

"How can we trust that you're not lying about that, Abby? You lied to your parents. Why should this jury believe that you're telling the truth now?" He was standing right in front of the witness box, towering over the scared six year old girl. Barba could see that the jury was displeased with how the girl was being treated and thought it would work to their advantage. There was no doubt in his mind, they'd just won this case.

"Objection, your honor" Barba said standing from his chair again. "Badgering the witness".

"Sustained. Step back, Mr. Holder" she ordered. He stepped back from the witness chair and went back to his seat.

"I have nothing further for this witness". The judge looked over at Abby and told her she could get down from the stand. She practically ran over to Christina and gave her a big huge. Chris picked her up and carried her out the courtroom with her parents following close behind. She put her down once they were outside and kneeled in front of her.

"I'm so proud of you" she said taking both of her hands in her own. "You did so great, just like I knew you would". Abigail wrapped her arms around Chris' neck and held her tight.

"Abigail, let her breath" her mother said prying her away from Chris. The doors to the courtroom opened and people started filing out. Olivia, Fin, Nick and Amanda finally emerged followed shortly after by Barba. He told the Mannings that they were done for the day and they could take their daughter home. He was fairly certain that they wouldn't need Abby to get on the stand again so they wouldn't need to come back until the verdict. They said goodbye and walked away towards the elevators. Chris watched until they got on the elevator and gave Abby one last wave goodbye as the doors closed then turned back to her team.

"Nice of you to show up" Barba said. "Better late than never, huh?" Chris could tell he was being sarcastic and criticizing her for being late to court. She thought he should've been appreciative that she'd shown up at all.

"Yeah" she said before walking away towards the bathroom. He was about to say something else but Amanda stopped him.

"Come on Barba, cut her some slack" she said sticking up for her. "Her mom's in the hospital". She walked away towards the bathroom to go check on Christina.

"How is her mom doing?" he asked looking at Benson.

"Not good" she said simply. When Chris and Amanda came back from the bathroom and they left the courthouse to head to the precinct. They finished out their shift and planned on going for a drink. They invited Chris but she declined, saying she needed to get home and make dinner for her brother and sister and take a plate to the hospital for her father. He was now refusing to stay at home. He went to work from the hospital and then straight back afterwards. The nurses had brought a cot in the room for him to sleep on. If she didn't take him food herself, she couldn't be sure that he was eating at all. Amanda went over to her as she was packing up her stuff to head out.

"Hey" she said leaning against her desk. "You want some company tonight? I can help you cook". Chris laughed at Amanda offering to help her cook. "Or I could watch" she said playfully slapping her shoulder.

"Thanks but I'm ok" she said turning down her offer. "You should go out and have a drink. I'm not really much for good company right now anyway".

"You know you don't have to do this alone" Amanda said taking her hand. "I'm here for you". Chris nodded her head.

"I know" she said softly. "I just…I have some things to talk about with my family and some hospital forms to look over for my mother's treatment. It's a lot to deal with and I just need some time alone to….work through it all. But you should go" she said giving her hand a light squeeze. "Have a drink for me".

"Ok". Chris gave her hand another squeeze before letting go and heading out of the precinct. Amanda, Fin, Olivia and Nick headed out to the bar shortly after. They found a booth and ordered there drinks, talking mostly about the case. Then Nick decided to bring up what was on all of their minds.

"So, uh, how's Reyes doing with everything?" he asked looking at Rollins.

"She's keeping it together" she said, "taking care of everything and everyone same as always".

"She went to see her mother today didn't she?" Fin asked. Amanda nodded her head. "Did the doctors give her any news?"

"She didn't say if anything had changed" she said taking a drink from her beer. "She did say that she had some forms to look over".

"She shouldn't be trying to do this on her own" Benson said shaking her head.

"I don't think she knows any other way to do things" Amanda said finishing her beer. They talked more about Chris and what they could do to help her. Amaro suggested again to Benson that she order Reyes to take time off. Rollins didn't like the idea. She'd talked to Reyes about it and knew that she needed all the time she could get on the clock. Every penny she had was going towards her mother's care. They went back and forth for a couple of minutes before Benson settled the argument, saying she wasn't going to make her take time off. Fin didn't know why they wouldn't just sit down with Reyes and ask her what she needed from them. Amanda knew she'd say she didn't need anything.

Chris made it to the hospital at eight o'clock that evening with dinner and a change of clothes for her father. She sat with him while he ate and looked over the papers the doctor gave her earlier that day. She got to the do not resuscitate order and thought about how to talk to her father about it. She figured she'd start with him and then talk with her brother and sister. Her father finished his dinner then went to the bathroom to change into pajamas and brush his teeth. When he came back Chris took a deep breath and started talking.

"Papa, I talked to the doctor this afternoon" she said turning to face him. "She's not getting better. She's getting worse".

"I know" he said nodding his head. "But she will get better when they find her a heart" he said sitting down in the chair next to his wife's bed. He took her hand and kissed it softly. "Tan pronto como ella obtiene un nuevo corazón".

"Ella es no obtiene un nuevo corazón, papa" she said. His eyes snapped up to meet hers.

"What are you talking about?" he asked angrily. "We agreed she'd have the operation".

"I know we did but ma doesn't want it" she said bracing herself for his reaction. "She told me she doesn't want it".

"She doesn't know what she is saying!" he yelled causing Chris to jump slightly at his sudden increase in volume. "She's not well".

"She does know, dad" Chris said firmly. "She's been saying it since the day she came in here. She doesn't want the surgery".

"No" he said shaking his head. "I'm making the decisions for her. She's having the surgery".

"She doesn't want it. She's started refusing her medication" she said softly. "She's dying. She knows she's dying. She wants to go". She reached up and took her father's hand. "We have to let her go". Tears welled up in his eyes until he couldn't hold them any longer. He let his head fall down to rest on his wife's side and broke down into tears. Chris continued to sit with him and hold his hand, fighting hard to hold back tears of her own. Once he'd calmed down, she gave him the papers he needed to sign. When he got to the DNR, he hesitated, looking over the paper, at his wife then back at the paper again before finally signing it. Her father eventually laid down to sleep. Chris slipped quietly out of the room and headed home.

She wasn't expecting to find her brother and sister still awake when she got home but they were in the living room waiting for her when she came in. They asked how their mom was doing and she had to have the same conversation again with them. Robbie was understandably upset, wanting to know why she'd kept this from them. She explained that she was hoping to change their mother's mind but it was becoming clear that there was no chance of that happening. They'd all have to use this time to accept their mother's decision and spend as much time with her as they could to say their goodbyes. Jeza was quiet during their talk. She didn't show much emotion, not unlike her sister. She just got up from the couch and went upstairs to her room. Chris talked with her brother for a while longer before leaving him in the living room and going to her room. She changed her clothes and settled down to sleep. She tossed and turned, not able to get the sounds of her father sobbing or her brother's yelling out of her head. She finally gave up and just laid there staring up at the ceiling. She did that for hours, then got up, took her blanket and went downstairs to the kitchen, grabbing a bowl and spoon and getting herself some ice cream. She went to the couch and turned on the tv, flipping through channels until she found a show to watch on the animal planet channel. She fell asleep there with the soft noise of the tv in the background, dreaming of good times she'd had with her mother.

**Spanish-English Translation **

**Tan pronto como ella obtiene un nuevo corazon- **As soon as she gets a new heart

**Ella es no obtiene un nuevo corazon, papa**- She isn't getting a new heart papa


	31. Chapter 31: More Bad News

Chapter 31: More Bad News

Robbie woke Christina the next morning. The alarm she'd set on her phone hadn't gone off and she'd overslept. She rushed upstairs to her room to get ready for work. Jeza was bugging her about wanting to stay home from school. She didn't feel like dealing with people and their stares and whispers. It was just one day. Chris was hesitant to let her skip for the day but she didn't have time to argue. She said she didn't have to go to school but she wasn't going to sit at home all day. She'd take her to the hospital and she could stay there with their father. She barely argued at all, just got her stuff and went out to the car. She dropped her off at the hospital and then rushed to work. When she walked into the squad room she could tell that something major was going on. The entire squad room was gathered around the board and screen in their bullet proof vests and Lieutenant Murphy, the new commanding officer of the squad, was giving orders. William Lewis, the man who'd kidnapped and assaulted Benson, had escaped prison and they were sure he was coming after Olivia again. Chris hadn't been there when Olivia had been through her ordeal or for Lewis' trial but from what she could gather he'd undeniably left his mark on the entire precinct. She was now seeing his history of psychopathy and brutality first hand.

Murphy almost sent her home saying he didn't need anyone on this case who wasn't one hundred percent focused. She assured him that she was up for the job and they got right to work trying to track this psycho down. He was really giving them a run for their money and they could all tell that Olivia was getting restless. He'd raped a teenage girl named Lauren and kidnapped her younger sister, Amelia, holding her hostage. Even though she was off the case, she came to the hospital to talk to the victim who insisted on speaking only to Sergeant Benson. He'd given her his demands: a public confession and apology from Benson for the girl's life. She talked to him on the phone but he was playing games same as always. They couldn't wait to catch the bastard and do away with him once and for all. Lewis was leading them on a wild goose chase through the city, leaving blood and bodies in his wake. He was even bold enough to continue making phone calls, taunting Rollins and Benson when they answered. Benson decided to give him what he wanted and, against the advice of Lt Murphy, made a public apology to Lewis. It didn't matter. He wasn't going to let Amelia go. Murphy finally ordered Benson to take her protective detail and go home to get some rest. She managed to slip from underneath their watchful eyes and go meet Lewis on her own in an attempt to save the girl. The squad kicked into overdrive to find her and save before Lewis could do any further harm. A series of events and intel led them to a warehouse where they heard Lewis forcing Benson to play a game of Russian Roulette, broadcasting a play by play over the radio. When they heard the gunshot, they finally knew their position and rushed in to see Benson and Amelia tied up and Lewis dead. They quickly got them both out of there and secured the scene.

An investigation into Olivia's actions was conducted over the next couple of days. Chris was finding out just how much they didn't trust IAB and just how paranoid Amaro could be. When IAB closed its investigation, clearing Benson of any wrong doing, they gathered at her apartment to celebrate only to have the celebration ruined by Murphy bringing bad news. Despite IAB's report, the Brooklyn DA was actually going to try to bring charges against Benson in the death of William Lewis. It was a grueling few days of grand jury testimonies and they were all worried about the outcome. The DA was really going after her. Chris hated to admit it to herself but she was thankful for the distraction. Her mother was in the hospital deteriorating and her family was at home fighting over what to do about it. She'd already accepted the inevitable. For the first time in a couple weeks, the focus of everyone's sympathies weren't on her.

The grand jury finally concluded having refused to return an indictment and they went back to business as usual. Cases were rolling in and they were working like a well-oiled machine under the direction of their new commander. His style was taking some getting used to but Chris liked him. Amanda told her about going undercover with him and how he'd saved her shield. She figured if Amanda trusted him then she should too. He was understanding of her personal situation and gave her flexibility to come and go when something came up with her mother's care. She was sitting at her desk catching up on paperwork that'd been piling up, getting into her own rhythm of getting things done. Amanda, Fin and Olivia were at their desks and Amaro had the day off to go see his daughter. They were talking about breaking for lunch, trying to convince Reyes to come out to get something to eat with them. This would've made the third day in a row that she'd skip the meal if she said no. She was arguing one on one with Amanda when her sister walked into the squad and stood next to her desk.

"I need to talk to you" she said getting her attention. Chris looked over and saw her sister there and immediately got upset because she was supposed to be in school.

"What are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to you" she repeated.

"This couldn't have waited until I got home tonight?" she asked angrily. "I'm tired of you skipping school Jeza".

"I'm not skipping. It's my lunch period".

"Since when can you leave school for lunch?" she asked knowing that wasn't allowed. "Go back to school".

"But I need to talk to you" she said again.

"We can talk tonight when I come home".

"You mean if you come home" she smart alecked. Chris got up from her desk and grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair, putting it on. She knew the only way she could be sure that her sister would go back to school was if she drove her herself.

"I will. Come on" she said grabbing her phone and keys and heading for the door.

"I'm pregnant" Jeza said softly stopping her sister in her tracks. Chris stood there frozen, silently praying that she hadn't just heard what she knew she'd heard leave her sister's mouth. Chris took a deep breath and turned to look at her sister.

"Let's go. You're going back to school" she said as if her sister hadn't just dropped a bombshell on her.

"Did you hear me?" she asked. "I said I'm pregnant".

"I don't care!" she yelled. "God damn it Jezalyn, you are not going to ruin your life. I don't care how hard it is or long it takes, you are graduating high school. Now move it!" She grabbed her by the jacket and forced her towards the door. She turned around to see everyone, including Murphy, staring at her. She felt like she was about to explode. She took another calming breath and made her way out of the squad room to take her sister back to school. Murphy instructed everyone to get back to work and waited to make sure everyone was occupied before returning to his office. They didn't speak about the scene between Reyes and her sister when she returned from lunch. They all just worked quietly at their desks, watching the clock until it was time for them to leave. They invited her out for a drink but she declined saying that she had to get home to deal with her pregnant teenaged sister. Amanda walked her out and told her to call if she needed anything even though she knew she wouldn't.

Later that night, Amanda took Frannie for a walk and when she got back to her apartment, she got right in her truck and drove over to Chris' house. She went up and knocked on the door then patiently waited with Frannie for someone to answer. After a couple minutes, Chris opened the door and let her in. She followed her over to the couch where Chris had five empty beer bottles sitting on the table and a sixth in her hand. Amanda sat down next to her contemplating whether she should take the beer from her or not. She decided against it and just sat there quietly with Chris as she finished the beer and put the bottle on the table with the others.

"How'd it go with your sister?" she asked in a whisper.

"She wants to keep the baby" she leaned forward to pick up her beer bottle only to find it empty and remember she'd just finished it. "As if I need any more bad news" she said softly. She laughed to herself and shook her head, "The girl's never taken care of a damn thing in her life but she wants to take care of a kid".

"Maybe you can change her mind" she said.

"No" she said shaking her head. "She's too much like me". Amanda didn't know what to say. She could understand how Chris must've been feeling. So many things were piling up on her one after the other. "You didn't have to come" she said getting up from the couch. She gathered the beer bottles from the table and taking them to the kitchen. She put them in the trash and went to the refrigerator to get another but there weren't any left. She shut the door and went back to the living room, retaking her seat next to Amanda.

"Murphy offered you time off, Chris" she said putting her hand on her shoulder. "Maybe you should take it".

"No" she said shaking her head. "My father's not working anymore and my brother's not getting a lot of hours. Someone has to bring in a steady paycheck if we're gonna keep up with the medical bills for my mother's care".

"I can lo…."

"No" Chris said knowing that Amanda was about to offer to help her with the payments. "I don't want you to do that. You have your own….stuff to worry about".

"If by "stuff" you mean gambling debts, I don't have any" Amanda said still whispering. She assumed her family was in the house sleeping and she didn't want to be too loud. "I can help you".

"I don't want any help".

"Why are you so stubborn?" she asked not understanding why she refused to let anyone help her. "I already told you that you don't have to do this alone. You have me". Chris reached down and pet Frannie on the head, ignoring what Amanda was saying.

"I'm tired" she said standing up. Amanda grabbed Frannie's leash, stood up from the couch and walked to the door.

"I can stay" she said turning around to face her. "If you want me to" she added. Christina thought for a minute about whether she wanted Amanda to stay or not. She went back and forth in her head, arguing with herself. She wanted the comfort but didn't want to seem weak and vulnerable. She finally made a decision that a couple weeks ago would've been the last thing she'd ever do. She showed some emotion. She blinked back her tears and found the words she was looking for.

"I would…." She cleared her throat, "I would really…love it if you would" she said, her voice breaking slightly. Amanda could tell that Chris was embarrassed by how emotional she was because she couldn't look her in the eyes. She didn't want her to think too much about it so she started up the stairs with Frannie. Chris turned out all the lights before joining her upstairs in her bedroom. Amanda let Frannie off her leash and put it on the dresser. They both undressed and climbed in bed. Frannie jumped up and settled down at the end the same as she did in Amanda's bed. Chris laid there for a minute and stared at the ceiling then, to Amanda's surprise, she turned over and scoot into her, laying her head on her chest. Amanda wrapped her arms around her and held her until they both fell asleep.


	32. Chapter 32: Take Some Time

Chapter 32: Take Some Time

Chris' alarm went off at seven, waking her and Amanda. They were up getting dressed when there was a knock on her door. Before she could tell whoever it was that she'd be out in a minute, her door swung open and Jeza bounced into her room. She had her laptop in her hands and a big smile on her face. She stopped in her tracks when she saw Frannie laying in Chris' bed looking at her. She looked over and saw Amanda standing there in just her slacks and bra and then looked at her sister who was also half dressed. She stood there staring between the two of them for another minute before speaking.

"You know just because mami's in the hospital doesn't mean you can parade women through the house" she said turning her nose up at Amanda.

"Get out" Chris said pushing her sister out of her bedroom. It was only seven fifteen and she was already annoyed. They finished getting dressed and Chris walked Amanda and Frannie to the door. She needed to go home, shower and change into fresh clothes before work. Jeza was sitting at the dining room table with a bowl of cereal and her laptop. Chris was surprised to see her up and ready for school so early and without complaints. She walked past her into the kitchen and started a pot of coffee and looked in the frig for something for breakfast. She decided on having a bowl of cereal like her sister and joined her at the table.

"You need to see the stuff I've found for the baby" Jeza said excitedly. "It's all so cute". She got up from her chair and went over to sit next to her sister and sat her laptop between them so she could see what she was looking at. "I like this crib and this bouncer turns into a high chair so we wouldn't need to buy one when the baby starts sitting up". She started clicking on pages she'd bookmarked with designs for baby rooms and baby clothes and the latest baby technology from monitors to bottle warmers. Chris could barely keep up with her. She couldn't believe how excited her sister was about impending parenthood. Chris hated that she had to crush that for her.

"Jezalyn" she said stopping her ranting. "We can't afford any of this stuff". Jeza's smile slowly faded and she closed her laptop.

"Well, we have nine months to save up" she said with a lot less enthusiasm than she had just a few seconds ago. "Well, actually, I've been doing some research and it's really about ten months…."

"Look, Jeza" she said stopping her again, "I can see you're really happy about being pregnant but you're a teenager. This isn't exactly the best thing".

"You always do this" she said angrily getting up from the table.

"I always do what?" Chris asked.

"You always make me feel like everything I do is a mistake, like I can't get anything right". She picked up her bowl and took it to the kitchen before coming back for her laptop. "Every time you see me happy, you always do whatever you can to bring me down".

"Jezalyn, that's not true. You're my sister. I love you. Of course I want you to be happy" she said getting up and following her sister upstairs. "But the things that make you happy are…."she scoffed, "questionable and not making you very successful".

"Maybe I don't want to be like you" she said turning and stopping on the stairs. "Being successful hasn't gotten you anything. You're still single, you have no friends, and you're always at work".

"Ok, I might be single and, yes, I work a lot but I do have friends" she said looking up at her. "And I wouldn't be bragging about my associates if I were you".

"See, you're always putting me down!" she yelled stomping the rest of the way up the stairs. She went in her room and slammed the door. Robbie came out of his room buttoning up his work shirt.

"What's her problem?" he asked fixing his collar.

"Oh, nothing. I'm just ruining her life, same as any other day" she said still standing on the stairs. "I have to get to work. You need to be leaving soon too. Jeza can't be late to school again". She walked down a few stairs before stopping and turning to look back at her brother, "We're gonna need to talk tonight so come right home after work".

"I can't" he said standing at the top of the stairs looking down at her. "I have plans with some of the guys".

"Well you need to cancel them" she said like he had no choice. "It's important, Robbie. I need you to be here".

"Alright, geez, calm down" he said pacifying her motherly tone. "I'll be here". Chris descended the stairs and went to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee to take with her to work. She grabbed her bag and headed out the door. Robbie banged on Jeza's door and told her to get a move on. Five minutes later, they were walking out the door. Robbie kept texting Christina all day, asking what they needed to talk about. She told him to come home right after work and he'd find out. They were working a case of an actress who'd brought her daughter in, accusing her ex-husband of molestation. The mother's behavior was suspicious and it was difficult to tell if the girl had been coached. Amanda was on the fence about the accusation. She didn't want another Jackie Walker situation happening on her watch. Chris took phone calls from her father, checking in on her mother in the hospital. Amanda took time out of her day to hit a GA meeting. They didn't avoid each other but they didn't make an effort to talk about the night before either. They tried to be as normal as possible. Murphy was really going easy on Reyes given her current family situation. He got her out of the squad room an hour early despite her insisting that she was fine to keep working with the rest of the squad. He ordered to go home so she took her things and left, dreading the conversation she had to have when she got home.

Chris made tacos for dinner when she got home and set the table. Robbie walked in the door at seven and went right upstairs to get ready for dinner. Chris called Amanda but didn't get an answer. She decided against leaving a message and went back to getting dinner ready. Robbie came downstairs and sat on the couch, flipping through channels to find anything good to watch. Jeza walked in the door with a boy about her age in tow. Robbie sat up from his relaxed position on the couch when he saw his sister walk in the house with a boy. Chris came out to the living room and saw them heading up the stairs.

"Uh, where are you going?" she said stopping them.

"We're gonna go wait up in my room until dinner's ready" she said.

"No, you're not" she said back. "The living room is very comfortable and it's perfect for entertaining guests. Park it" she said pointing to the couch. She went back to the kitchen to put the finishing touches on dinner. She tried calling Amanda again but she still didn't answer. She assumed that she was still at work. Jeza stepped off the stairs and huffed over to the couch, her boyfriend following close behind her. They sat down on the couch still under the scrutinizing eye of Robbie who didn't seem very happy to see this kid with his sister. He looked to be Hispanic, Robbie guessed Mexican. He had shoulder length black hair, wore a short sleeved t-shirt that showed off his copious tattoos and his pants were sagging off his waist.

"Stop staring at him like that" Jeza said noticing how Robbie was glaring at her boyfriend. Robbie ignored her and continued staring until Chris called them to the table to eat. "Where's dad?" Jeza asked taking her seat at the table. Her boyfriend took the seat next to her and Robbie sat across from them. Chris took her seat at the head of the table and started to fill her plate. Jeza and her boyfriend followed her lead but Robbie wasn't in any hurry to eat.

"What's going on, Christina?" he asked angrily. "Who the hell is this guy?"

"You're always so rude!" Jeza yelled.

"Hey, come on" Chris said looking between them. She wasn't in the mood for any arguments. "Robbie, this is Javier. Jeza's boyfriend" she said making the official introduction. "Javier this is Robbie. Jeza's older brother".

"Sup" he said giving him a head nod.

"Sup?" Robbie repeated. "Hey, where'd you find this clown?" he asked looking at Jeza. Chris sighed and shook her head. She knew she couldn't stop the fight that was about to happen between her brother and sister. They argued back and forth about Jeza's choice for a boyfriend and Javier tried to step in, telling Robbie not to yell at his girlfriend. Chris just sat there and enjoyed her tacos while they fought it out. It ended when Jeza got up from the table and stormed out of the house with her boyfriend. Chris went after her and made her come back. She stayed on the porch with her boyfriend for about ten minutes before coming inside and stomping up the stairs to her room, slamming her door shut. Robbie looked satisfied with himself, having run his sister's boyfriend off. He made himself a plate and took it up to his room. Chris sat at the table by herself with her dinner and a glass of wine. She hadn't even gotten to tell Robbie about Jeza being pregnant, which is what the whole dinner was about. She got up from the table, put away the leftovers, cleaned up the dishes and went upstairs to her room. She called Amanda again. She answered this time and they talked about what a train wreck Chris' dinner was. Amanda told Chris about how her program was going and then filled her in on what was happening with the case. They talked for an hour and a half then got off the phone and went to bed.

The next few days went by and they were still working on the celebrity child abuse case. Murphy keened in on Amanda's reluctance to jump on the guilty train and offered her some advice, even though she hadn't asked for it. He had a habit of doing that. Nick had told her about how he sat him down during all the trouble with Olivia after William's death. He wasn't shy at all about letting her know that he didn't like him. Chris didn't know anything about what was going on with Amanda and Nick. Amanda wasn't even sure what was going on with her and Nick. She debated whether she should tell Chris but the timing or topic of conversation never seemed right to mention it. They continued talking about the case and Amanda's change of mind. Any doubt she had vanished when the ex-sister in law disclosed about the abuse she suffered at the hands of their suspect when she was a little girl. Then when he fled the country, they were sure he'd done it. The jury found him guilty but there was nothing they could do to bring him back. He had dual citizenship. That was it. The case was closed.

Chris' mother's condition was steadily declining and Murphy was pushing her to take time off. She said she didn't want or need it. The worse her mother got, the more she worked. She still hadn't told her brother or her father about Jeza being pregnant and if she was being honest, she wasn't in any hurry to do it. Jeza already told her she wouldn't be the one to tell them because she didn't want to deal with their reactions. So as usual, it was up to Chris to handle it and she was fine to avoid handling it for as long as she could. They were working on a case involving a photographer who fantasized about torturing young boys. As hard as they tried, they couldn't find any evidence that he'd done anything illegal and they couldn't prosecute him for thinking, or so they thought. Barba found a way to bring him up on charges and take him to trail. Chris thought it was wrong and Amanda agreed with her but Liv and Nick thought they needed to get this guy any way they could so he wouldn't have the opportunity to hurt a child.

"Come on, Reyes" Fin said from his desk, "You really think we should've let this guy go? You heard what Huang said. He's escalating. It won't be long before he has a boy in that chamber doing everything he writes about online".

"I know that it's wrong, what he thinks about….what he fantasizes about. It's absolutely perverted and disgusting and wrong on every level but fantasizing isn't against the law. He hasn't hurt anyone. We shouldn't be able to put people on trial because we don't like what they think about".

"Raping and torturing young boys" Amaro said jumping into the conversation. "This isn't some harmless daydream. He set up that room, he was discussing buying a boy with Murphy and Fin. That crap he said about role playing, that's bull. He was serious" he said angrily. "And you think we should just let him walk away?"

"He hasn't done anything" she said feeling like a broken record. "If we can put him on trial for his thoughts then I should be on trial too. I mean, I fantasize about doing all kinds of things that are illegal all of the time but I don't do it. I shouldn't face jail time for having a thought". She hated what this guy fantasized about but it was just that, a fantasy. He'd never taken or hurt a child before and she didn't think they should be able to make a preemptive strike. "Look, I know this is more personal for you because you have a son but…."

"Hey, leave my son out of this" Nick said defensively.

"Alright, that's enough" Murphy said from the doorway of his office. "This case has a lot of our emotions on ten and it's hard to know the right things to do. It's not in our hands anymore. It's the DA's baby now to do with what he wants. We've got other cases to focus on so let's do that. Reyes, can I see you in my office please?" he asked even though it wasn't a request. Chris got up and followed him into his office, shutting the door behind her.

"You like picking fights with Amaro, huh?"

"I didn't pick a fight with him" she said sitting down in a chair in front of his desk. "I was having a conversation with Fin about this case and he jumped in".

"You two don't get along much" he said, making an observation.

"We bump heads. We're very different. We think differently; have different styles".

"That's it?"

"Should there be more?"

"You have a problem with assertive men" he said as if he knew he wasn't wrong. "Me, Amaro, your brother" he said remembering an argument she had with her brother at a bar when out with the squad. "Not only that but you like to question authority in general".

"I have a problem with men who think that I should defer to them _because_ they're men. And I only question authority when I think it's wrong". She hoped she wasn't about to get one of Murphy's therapy sessions because she really wasn't in the mood. Murphy could tell that she wasn't open to probing and wouldn't be receptive to any advice from him so he got to the part he'd been waiting for all day.

"I'm ordering you to take time off" he said taking a seat behind his desk.

"What? Why?" Chris said angrily.

"Your mother's dying, your little sister's pregnant….you've got a lot on your plate and I can tell you won't admit to yourself that you need to take some time so I'm gonna make it easy for you" he said letting her know she didn't have a choice in the matter. "Finish your shift and go home. Take a week".

"A week?" she said in disbelief. "I can't take a week off".

"This isn't up for discussion".

"I don't do this because I'm stubborn. I need to work. I have to pay a mortgage, utilities, two car notes, buy groceries, pay cell phone bills, medical expenses. My father isn't working. He's spending all of his time at the hospital with my mother and my brother's hours just got cut on his job. I can't afford to take a week off. I can't afford to take one day off".

"You can't afford not to" Murphy shot back. "Look, Reyes, I understand everything you're up against but you're wearing. yourself. down" he said putting emphasis on each word. "You're running on fumes here and if you keep going the way you've been you're gonna have a hell of a lot more troubles than cash flow. I'm giving you a reprieve. Take it". He could see she was about to argue but he wasn't going to give her a chance. "Finish your shift and go home" he said again. "One week. My decision is final". She took a deep breath to calm her anger then got up and left his office, straining not to slam the door behind her. She sat at her desk fuming, barely able to get any work done. Benson, Amaro, Rollins and Tutuola kept taking glances her way, wondering what Murphy had said to piss her off. When the clock hit seven, she gathered her stuff and headed out. Amanda got up from her desk and followed her to the elevator. She stepped on just as the doors were closing and rode down with her.

"What happened?" she asked. "What'd Murphy say?"

"He's making me take a week off" she said staring straight ahead. Amanda didn't have anything to say. She was glad that she'd been ordered to take time off. She knew she wouldn't do it any other way. They stepped off the elevator and headed out to Chris' car. "You agree with him, don't you?" she asked noticing her silence.

"Yeah, I do" she said honestly. "I know you need the money to take care of your family but what about you?" she asked genuinely concerned. "When are you gonna start taking care of yourself?" They reached Chris' car and she unlocked and opened the door. "You're no good to anyone like this. I don't care how much you say you're fine. You're not".

"Keep me in the loop on the case?" she asked not having the energy to continue arguing with people about her state of body and mind. Amanda nodded silently at her request. Chris got in her car and pulled off the parking lot and Amanda made her way back inside. Instead of going home, she drove to the hospital to see her mother same as she did every day after work. She did it to check in on how her mother was doing but also to check in on her father. He was basically living at the hospital; eating, sleeping and bathing there. She sat with her mother while her father took a break to stretch his legs and get some fresh air. When he came back she offered to go home and get clean clothes and a plate of food for him but he declined. He'd already eaten dinner and he still had a few days before he'd need more clothes. She stayed a while longer, then kissed her parents goodbye and headed home. She took a nice, relaxing bath when she got home then went to bed. She was so exhausted that she was out like a light almost immediately after her head hit the pillow.


	33. Chapter 33: It's Time

Chapter 33: It's Time

Her first day off from work, she kept herself occupied around the house and ran a few errands that she'd been putting off for a while. She had lunch with her father at the hospital and stayed long enough to see her mother wake up. It was nice to see her eyes and hear her voice, even if it was raspy and weak. She told Chris she looked tired and needed to take a break from working so hard. Chris chuckled and told her mom that she was already on it and promised that she'd take care of herself just as much as she took care of everyone else, even if she didn't know how she would. Her mother stayed awake for an hour before falling asleep again. The number on her monitor was getting lower and lower. They'd told them that if it dropped below seventy that would mean she was in heart failure. Her monitor read seventy two. Chris stared at the monitor as the number dropped and the machine beeped: seventy one. Her father was used to it. He barely responded to the noise, only glancing up for a second before returning his attention to his wife. He brushed her hair and put chapstick on her chapped lips. Chris smiled as she watched her father care for her mother. She felt lucky to have grown up in house with two parents who showed her what true love was all about, all the way to the end.

A nurse came in and checked her vitals, her fluids, and asked both Chris and her father if they needed anything. They both said they were fine. She nodded and left them alone again. Robbie Sr. sat down and started reading a newspaper he'd gone out and gotten early that morning. Chris read a book she'd brought with her. She didn't check the time until her brother and sister came in at four thirty. They went right over to hug their father who they hadn't seen in a couple days because they hadn't been to the hospital every day like Chris. She got up and gave her seat to Jeza to sit by their mother's side and went out to call Amanda. She told her that the trial was still going on. It didn't look like it was going too well so far. Chris reminded her that they were trying someone who hadn't actually broken any laws so it not going well made a lot of sense. She said they were still getting information about Simon every day and Barba was hoping things would turn around.

"How's your mom?" she asked.

"She's fine" she answered without thinking. "I mean…she's still dying and everything but she's comfortable; not in any pain. I'm at the hospital now. We're all here. It's, uh, it's getting closer to that time I think" she said sadly. "She was awake earlier. I got to talk to her" she said in a happier tone. "The first thing she said was that I look tired" she said with a laugh. Amanda laughed on the other end of the phone. She paused for a moment to take a breath and her emotions hit her hard when she thought that she might have had the last conversation she'd ever have with her mother. "I'm scared Amanda" she said with a tremble in her voice. "I don't know what I'm gonna do without my mom". She heard her name and turned to see her mother's doctor standing behind her. "Um, I have to go" she said clearing her throat. "The doctor needs to talk to me". She was glad that she needed to get off the phone. She didn't want to break down talking to Amanda. Not now. Not when she'd done such a good job holding it together so far. She said she'd call her later and quickly got off the phone to talk to the doctor. She told her that her mother's blood pressure had dropped below seventy and she was now in heart failure.

"It won't be much longer now" she said sympathetically. "I thought you might want to be the one to tell your father. It's time to start saying your final goodbyes".

"Thank you". She nodded and walked away leaving Chris standing in the middle of the hallway alone. Jeza stuck her head out of their mother's room and told her their mom was awake and was asking for her. Chris hurried back to the room and took her seat next to her mother's bedside and took her hand. "Hi mami" she said softly.

"Mija" she said weakly, "You look after your sister. I'm counting on you to make sure she does well. And promise me that you'll take better care of yourself". Christina silently nodded her head. "I mean it, Christina. I want you to be happy, not worry so much. Promise me" she repeated.

"I promise".

"I love you, mija. Everything about you. Everything". Chris stood up from her chair and leaned over her mother, kissing her on the cheek then hugging her.

"I love you too" she said blinking back her tears. She pulled away and retook her seat. Gloria turned her head and looked at her husband who was sitting on the other side of her. She had such love in her eyes. She knew this was their final goodbye.

"You're going to be ok" she said. He took his wife's hand and brought it to his lips, kissing it softly. His eyes filled with tears that spilled effortlessly down his cheeks. "You have to be strong. Tienes que cuidar de nuestros hijos. Te quiero" she said softly. Roberto Sr. broke down and started sobbing. Chris looked over her shoulder to see her standing next to her with tears streaming down her face. She reached over and took her hand, giving it a supportive squeeze. Robbie Jr. was standing behind his father. Chris could see that he was fighting back his tears but he couldn't stop a few of them escaping his eyes and falling down his cheeks. Roberto Sr. got up from his chair and kissed his wife softly on the lips.

"Tambien te quiero" he whispered. A single tear escaped Gloria's eye and rolled down her face. Her breathing slowed and her eyes got heavier and heavier until they finally closed. Chris stood up and stepped into the hallway then came back with the doctor. Robbie moved over to stand by Jeza and let the doctor take his place by the monitors. The room was silent apart from Jeza's sniffles and the beeping monitor. They sat and waited, listening as the beeping of the monitor slowly sped up then emitted a continuous tone and they saw a flat line on the screen. Jeza fell into her brother's arms and they cried together. Robbie Sr. let his head fall on the bed and he held onto to his wife's hand for dear life as he sobbed into the blanket. Chris just sat there and stared into space, showing no feeling at all; feeling no feeling at all. The doctor pushed a button to turn off the monitor, silencing the deafening sound letting them know their loved one was gone. She quietly made her way out of the room to give them some time alone as a family.

It took a while to for Christina to get her father to let the doctors take her mother from her hospital room. He didn't want to be away from her for a minute but she couldn't let him stay there with her body forever. They took her down to the morgue. The hospital had given them all the forms they would need when her mother had decided she didn't want any further treatment. Chris told her father that it was time to sign them but he said he wasn't going to sign anything. She took him downstairs to the waiting room while she went back up to her mother's room. She packed up all her father's things and left the room to talk to the doctor. She made sure everything was in order to have her mother's body sent to the funeral home. The doctor assured her that everything was in order. The last thing they needed was the form to skip the autopsy and the release form. Chris explained that her father was having a hard time and she'd need more time to get the forms signed. She told her to take her time. They weren't in any rush. Chris thanked her and then went back downstairs to her family. It was nearing six thirty and she wanted to get her family home but her father was refusing to leave the hospital. He wanted to stay there until Gloria was moved to the funeral home then he wanted to stay there until she was buried. Chris was worried that he'd say he'd want to stay at her grave once she was buried. She tried to get Robbie to help her with their dad but he just stormed angrily out of the hospital. Chris followed him outside, yelling for him to come back but he just got in the car and screeched away from the hospital. Chris went back inside and made sure that Jeza was okay to wait with their dad while she went to work to get the forms she'd left in her desk. She looked at her father then back at Chris before nodding her head. She told her to call if she needed anything but she wouldn't be long. She left the hospital and headed to the precinct.

Chris walked into the precinct a little after seven, not expecting Murphy or anyone else from her team to still be there. But when she walked into the squad room, they were all there sitting at their desks. She just went over to her desk and opened her drawer looking for the papers she'd left there. They all looked at her wondering which one of them was going to say something first. Lt. Murphy told them that Chris was on leave for a week and that she was not to come in at all or have anything to do with their cases until her week off was over. If she came in before then, they were supposed to tell him. They didn't get the chance. Murphy saw her walk in and came out of his office to send her packing.

"Reyes, it hasn't even been a whole day yet and you're back" he said obviously annoyed with how stubborn she was.

"Don't worry" she said looking over her shoulder. "I'm not staying". She turned back to her desk and opened another drawer, finding what she was looking for. She grabbed the papers and closed her drawer. When she turned around Lt. Murphy, Amanda, Fin, Nick and Olivia were all staring at her. "I'm leaving". She took a step to leave but Murphy spoke again.

"Is that work?" he asked.

"No, it's not" she said.

"Let me see" he said holding his hand out for the papers.

"Why?" she said annoyed.

"Because I don't believe you. I ordered you to take a week off. That means no paperwork, no visits to the courthouse, and no phone calls trying to get info on how our cases are going". Chris looked accusingly at Amanda.

"It wasn't me" she said defensively. Chris handed over the papers so he could see that it wasn't work. He looked them over seeing that she was telling the truth. They were legal papers having to do with her mother's care.

"How's your mother doing?" he asked handing her back the papers. Chris swallowed hard and chewed on the inside of her cheek.

"She, uh…." She cleared her throat and blinked back tears. "She died a few hours ago" she said softly. She saw the sympathy immediately on everyone's faces and before they could start to console her she spoke up again. "I'm fine" she said with confidence. "I have to get back to the hospital. They can't release her body to the mortuary until they have these so…." She cleared her throat again. "Ok. Well, I'm gonna go". She couldn't get out of there fast enough. Amanda quickly stood up from her desk.

"You sure you don't need anything?" she asked concerned. Chris nodded her head.

"I'm fine" she said again, trying harder to convince herself than them.

"Take as much time as you need" Murphy said even though he knew she wouldn't take nearly enough. She just nodded silently and walked out of the squad room to get back to the hospital.

"Hundred bucks says she calls you crying tonight, Manda" Fin said leaning back in his chair. Rollins looked over and gave him an unpleasant glare. "What?" he asked innocently. Amanda shook her head and sat back down at her desk.

"She wasn't even gonna say anything" Amaro said. "She was just gonna take her papers and leave and not say a word. We wouldn't have known".

"Well, we know now" Murphy said, "So we check in on her, make sure she's taking care of herself. One of you find out when the funeral is; we'll take time out to be there". He walked back to his office, "It's still a week. No Reyes for a week" he said stopping inside his doorway. "Knowing her I might have to extend it" he said under his breath. He shut his office door and they got back to work.

When Chris arrived back at the hospital, Jeza and her father were still sitting the in waiting room where she'd left them. Javi was there now sitting next to Jeza and Roberto Sr. was in a daze, staring blankly into space. She went over to the nurse's station and asked for a pen then went back and kneeled down in front of him. He continued to stare blankly, almost as if he was looking right through her. She wondered how long it would take for him to be okay. She sat the papers and pen on his lap.

"Papa, necesito que usted firme estos papeles" she said softly.

"No". She could barely hear him. His voice was soft and weak. He was so broken.

"Papa, tienes que. If you don't sign they won't release mom's body to the mortuary" she explained. "Por favor, papa". He finally stopped staring into space and looked her right in the eyes. She picked up the pen and put it in his hand. More tears escaped his eyes as he signed one form, then the other. Christina took the pen and paper from him and stood up. She told Jeza she was going to go give the forms to the doctor and not to go anywhere. She saw a familiar face out of the corner of her eye and turned to see Franco walking into the hospital. He looked at her with sadness in his eyes and she knew that he knew her mother was gone. She wondered how he'd found out but in that moment it didn't matter. She walked over to him, wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tight. She could feel a lump building in her throat but she swallowed it down, breathing deeply to control her emotions.

"Jeza called me. Lo siento mucho, mi amada" he whispered. "Lo siento". She stood there in his arms for a few more minutes before pulling away. "If you need anything, I mean anything, I'm right here". She took another deep breath and brushed her hair out of her face.

"Ummm, no. I'm…I'm okay" she said. Then she changed her mind. "Actually, there is something".

"Name it" he said quickly.

"Robbie stormed out of here and he's god knows where doing god knows what" she said.

"Don't worry about it. I'll find him" he said confidently. He gave her shoulder a supportive squeeze then headed out of the hospital to go find her brother. She turned and went for the elevator to take the papers her father had just signed to the doctor. She took the forms and told her she'd take care of them getting to the right people so her mother's body could be released in a timely fashion. Chris thanked her for everything she'd done for her mother then said her final goodbye before going back downstairs to her family. She was finally able to get her father out of the hospital and to the car to go home. She didn't have the energy to argue when Jeza asked if Javi could come over. She just shrugged her shoulders and got in the driver's seat. Jeza took that as a yes and told Javi to get in the car. They were halfway home when Chris' phone started to ring. She answered and it was Amanda. She said that Robbie was at the precinct and he'd obviously been drinking. That was just what she needed: her brother drunk and belligerent at her job. She called Franco and told him she'd found him and to meet her at the precinct. She turned around and headed to the precinct to get him. When she pulled up, she told them to wait in the car and she'd be right back. Chris walked into the squad room to see Robbie sitting at her desk going through her drawers. She walked right over to him and hit him on the shoulder.

"Come on, let's go" she said shutting her desk drawers. She put her hand under his arm and tried to pull him up. He looked up and saw it was his sister and shrugged her off.

"Let go of me" he slurred.

"Let's go, Robbie" she said annoyed.

"Leave….me alone" he said angrily. Franco walked into the squad room and saw Chris standing over her brother trying to get him up. He walked over to help her.

"Robbie" he said taking his arm and pulling him. "Venga hermano. Vamonos". He pulled Robbie to his feet and helped him keep his balance. "Vamos a llevarte a casa". Everyone was standing around watching as Chris and Franco tried to get Robbie out of the squad room.

"I'm not going back to that house" he said still slurring his words. He tried to take a step away from Franco but he lost his footing and fell backwards onto the floor.

"Ay dios mio" Chris said under her breathe. This was the last thing she wanted to deal with. Why, of all of the places Robbie could've chosen to go, did he choose to come to her job. "Robbie, get up. Dad and Jeza are waiting downstairs in the car. Let's go". Franco helped him up from the floor but Robbie kept fighting him.

"You" he said looking at Chris, "you did this. You were supposed to save her" he said stumbling out of Franco's grip. "You let her die". Chris' breath hitched in her throat.

"Robbie come on man" Franco said grabbing his arm, "Stop talking" he said sternly.

"She let her die" he still slurring and stumbling around. Chris turned around and headed out of the squad room.

"Wai….Christina" Franco said calling after her.

"Let her leave" Robbie said waving her off.

"Hey, you need to get your head on straight" Franco said grabbing Robbie by his shirt. "What the hell is wrong with you?" Robbie pushed Franco away from him.

"My mother just died" he said angrily. He headed out of the squad room, kicking a chair on his way out. Franco stood there for a moment, just like everyone else, digesting what'd just happened. He cleared his throat and apologized for the interruption then followed Chris and Robbie out of the squad room. Amanda felt horrible for Christina. She wanted to go after her but she didn't want to argue with Murphy about getting involved. She decided she'd go over to her house and check on her when she left the precinct.

Chris had driven off with her father and sister, not bothering to wait for her brother after what he'd said to her. Franco had a hard time dealing with Robbie but finally got him home. Chris was sitting in the living room drinking. Franco got Robbie up to his room then came back down stairs. He went to the kitchen and got himself a glass then joined Chris in the living room for a drink. They just sat quietly with each other and enjoyed the richness of Chris' father's bottle of old scotch. It was nearing nine o'clock and Chris was exhausted from the day. She finally looked over at Franco and told him he could go.

"Seguro?" he asked. "I don't mind staying".

"Yeah, I….I'm just gonna go to bed" she said tiredly. She got up from the couch and took their glasses and the bottle of scotch to the kitchen. When she came back, Franco was waiting by the door. He grabbed her shirt and pulled her into a hug, holding her tight and kissing her top of her head.

"I'm just a phone call away" he said finally letting her go. "No importante que hora es, puede llamarme". He stood there and stared in her eyes. He'd never seen her so sad before. It broke his heart. He brought his hand up to touch her cheek, then without thinking stepped into her and brought their lips together in a soft kiss. She didn't immediately pull away but she didn't kiss him back either. She just stood there, numb and broken. There was a knock at the door, prompting Franco to end the kiss. He turned and looked to see who it was. "It's Amanda" he said asking Chris if she wanted her to come in. He hoped she'd say she didn't want to be bothered but she nodded her head, telling him to let her in. He opened the door and let her inside then said goodnight and made his exit, locking the door on his way out. Chris didn't say anything to Amanda. She just turned and went upstairs to her room. Amanda followed silently behind her closing her bedroom door once she was inside. Chris undressed, climbed into bed, and pulled the covers over her. Amanda wasn't sure what to do. She kicked off her shoes and took off her jeans and button down and climbed into bed with her in her underwear and tank top. She laid there quietly for a moment and just as she was about to say something Chris turned over and scoot into her. She wrapped her arm around her waist and laid her head down on her chest. She breathed deeply in and out. Amanda could tell that she was trying hard not to cry. She held onto her and ran her hands through her hair. It felt good to be there for her; with her. After ten minutes, Chris' breathing had slowed and she'd fallen to sleep. It didn't take long for Amanda to join her.

**Spanish-English Translations**

**Tienes que cuidar de nuestros hijos**- You have to take care of our children

**Te quiero**- I love you

**Tambien te quiero**- I love you too

**Papa, necesito que usted firme estos papeles- **Dad, I need you to sign these papers

**Papa, tienes que**- Dad, you have to

**Por favor, papa**- Please dad

**Lo siento mucho, mi amada**- I'm so sorry, my beloved

**Venga hermano. Vamanos**- Come on, brother. Let's go

**Vamos a llevarte a casa- **Let's get you home

**Ay dios mio**- Oh my god

**Seguro**- You sure?

**No importante que hora es, puede llamarme**- It doesn't what time it is, you can call me


	34. Chapter 34: Final Goodbye

Chapter 34: Final Goodbye

Amanda woke up the next morning and quietly slipped from underneath Christina. She tried to be as quiet as possible so she didn't wake her but when she opened the door to leave Chris lifted her head from the pillow and asked where she was going. She told her she had to be to work in an hour. She got this sad look on her face like she didn't want her to go. She just laid back down and closed her eyes to go back to sleep. Amanda slipped out and shut the door behind her and quietly made her way downstairs. She got down to the door when she heard someone clear their throat behind her. She turned around to see Jezalyn standing at the top of the stairs. She walked down and stopped on the landing.

"You're a fool if you think she cares about you" she said bluntly.

"Excuse me" Amanda said offended.

"She's just using you, like all the others. You think you're the first to sneak out of here early in the morning? You're not. At least she let you stay all night. Maybe that could make you feel special". Amanda just stood there. She didn't know what to say. "She doesn't feel anything for you. She doesn't feel anything for anyone". Her voice was full of disdain for her sister.

"That's not true" Amanda said. "She cares a lot about you and your brother and your dad".

"Whatever" she said brushing her off. "Believe what you want….but I know my sister and she doesn't love you". She turned around and went back upstairs to her room. Amanda left the house and went to her apartment to change for work. Chris woke up a couple hours later and made breakfast. She woke her father and Robbie and told them to come down to eat. Jeza was already up lounging in the living room. When her father and brother came down and sat at the table she got up from the couch and came over to join them. Chris came to the table with a cup of coffee and was about to sit down when the doorbell rang. She went over and answered it and saw Javier there. She let him inside and he went over to the table and sat down next to Jeza. When Robbie tried to start crap, Chris started to tell him to can it but she didn't get the chance to say anything. Their father spoke up and told him to shut up and eat his breakfast. They ate in silence and when they were done, they all went their separate ways. Robbie Sr. went upstairs to his room. Robbie went upstairs, got dressed and then left to go who knows where. Jeza and Javi lounged in the living room together while Chris cleaned up the breakfast dishes. The house was so quiet and everyone was so distant without their mother being there.

It was Tuesday, only Chris' second day off from work, and not even a full twenty four hours since her mother's death and she already wanted to get back to work. She called Amanda and asked her how the Simon Wilkes case was going and she was hesitant to answer her. She didn't think that work was something that she needed to be worried about. After some prodding, she told her that they dug up some dirt on him that Barba hoped to use to prove that Wilkes was an impending threat. Wilkes was scheduled to take the stand in a few days and after that the case was expected to go to the jury. She told her not to worry about the case or anything at work. They had everything covered. Chris told her that the funeral was going to be on Thursday. She said she'd tell everyone and they'd all be there. They talked for a few more minutes until Amanda had to get off the phone and get back to work. Chris had absolutely nothing to do. All the funeral arrangements were taken care of, her father was avoiding everyone, Robbie had taken off and Jeza was cuddling with her boyfriend on the couch. Then it came back to her that Jeza was pregnant and she still hadn't told her father or Robbie. She had no idea when a good time to share that news would be. She just knew that it wasn't right then.

With nothing else to do to occupy her time, she called Franco and asked if he wanted to come over. She knew he would say yes. Of course he would say yes. Half an hour later, he rang the doorbell and Chris let him in. Javi's mother came to pick him and Jeza up to take them shopping for baby accessories. Chris was glad to see her go. She didn't want to deal with the attitude she could tell was brewing in Jeza's mind. She sat in the living room with Franco, quietly at first then with light conversation. She told him about Jeza being pregnant and he was quick to say that he wasn't surprised. He knew the trouble that Chris had with her and he knew it was just a matter of time before she got herself into more boy related trouble. He felt bad that Chris had so much on her plate and there was really nothing he could do to help her with it. All he could do was try to be there for her and support her. They stayed in for half the day then Franco said they should go out. Chris got dressed and checked on her father who was still upstairs in his bedroom. He told her that he was fine and she should go do what she wanted. She reluctantly left him alone and left the house with Franco. They went to lunch then went for a walk in the park. Chris kept texting Amanda asking about things at work and she kept replying that she wasn't going to tell her anything. She gave up and asked her if she wanted to come over for dinner. Amanda was surprised by the invite but she said she would come.

Chris and Franco made it back to her house at five o'clock and Chris got started on dinner. Franco was hovering over her, getting on her nerves. He finally went to the living room and sat down to watch tv when she threatened to punch him in the face if he didn't leave her alone. Her father came downstairs and got a glass and his bottle of scotch then went back upstairs to his room. Chris was really worried about him. She didn't think it was good for him to be spending so much time alone. She figured she'd give him more time to grieve before she said anything to him. She got dinner in the oven and then went to sit with Franco in the living room. Robbie got home just before six and went right upstairs, not saying anything to Chris or Franco. Not long after Robbie, Jeza, Javi, and Sophia, Javi's mom, walked through the door with their hands full of shopping bags. She took them dropped them all in front of her sister and started to pull things out one by one, showing Chris all the cute baby clothes and monitors and breast pumps. It scared Chris how excited Jeza was to be having a baby. She didn't want her to get so wrapped up in Javi and the baby that she stopped thinking about finishing school and going to college.

"And we've been thinking about baby names" she said as she re-bagged all of her baby stuff. "We agreed on naming it after mom, if it's a girl" she said softly. "And you" she added. "Gloria Christina Ramirez". Chris swallowed hard and bit her lip. She couldn't believe that Jezalyn wanted to name her baby after her. "What do you think?" Chris nodded and cleared her throat.

"Yeah, it's….it's beautiful" she said with a soft smile. "What about if it's a boy?"

"Javi wants a junior" she said getting up from the floor.

"What's wrong with that?" he said from behind her.

"Nothing unless you bail on her" Franco said butting in. Chris slapped him on the shoulder.

"My son will taking care of his child" Sophia said speaking up for her son. "Nosotros no tenemos padres incumplidores en nuestra familia y nosotros no vamos a empezar con él, claro?"

"Si senora" he said sarcastically. Sophia rolled her eyes.

"Javier say goodbye" she said heading for the door. "Your father is waiting at home for dinner". Javi kissed Jeza and gave her a hug. Chris got up from the couch and went over to Sophia.

"I want to thank you for getting all this stuff for Jeza and the baby" she said nicely. "Really, we appreciate it".

"Don't mention it" she said waving her off. "You both just lost your mother" she said quietly, "and this is my grandchild so I'm happy to help. I'm glad I could do something to take her mind off of all that's happened. Jeza told us the services will be on Thursday". Chris nodded her head. "Javi and I will be there".

"Great. Jeza will….love that". She opened the door for them and they said goodbye again then turned and headed to their car. Chris shut the door and went to the kitchen to check on the lasagna she'd put in the oven. She put the bread in and set the timer on the stove for fifteen more minutes before going back to the living room to see Jeza lugging all her bags upstairs.

"You're really letting her keep this kid?" Franco asked. She sat down on the couch and sighed.

"It's not really my choice. It's hers".

"It shouldn't be" he said giving his opinion.

"Ok. Whose choice should it be?" Chris asked.

"Yours or your father's….an adult's" he suggested.

"So I should be able to tell her what to do with her body or my father?" she asked for clarification. "Who's next? Javi? Some random man on the street? Oh, I know, the government".

"Ok. You made your point" he said stopping her continuing. "I'm just saying we both know Jeza has questionable judgment. Do you really trust her to make the best decision for herself?"

"You say that like I know what's best for her".

"Don't you?" Just as she was about to answer his question the doorbell rang. At the same time, the timer on the oven sounded letting her know that dinner was ready. "You get the food. I'll get the door" Franco said getting up from the couch. Chris got up and went to the kitchen. She grabbed oven mitts and took the dish of lasagna out and carried it to the table setting it on the cooling mat. Franco was at the door seeing Amanda for the second time in as many days. He didn't know Chris had invited her over for dinner and Amanda didn't know that Franco was going to be there. Chris cut the bread and brought it over to the table then walked over to yell for everyone to come down to dinner. She saw Amanda standing there with Franco. She told them both to take a seat at the table then went upstairs to get her dad, brother and sister when they took too long to come down. Amanda picked a seat and Franco sat opposite her. There was an awkward silence between them then Franco decided to say something. "So, you….uh you're back in the picture?" he asked.

"I don't know what you mean".

"I mean, you and Chris. Are you back together?" Amanda shook her head.

"No" she answered simply. Chris came back down to the dining room to see them staring each other down. Robbie was first to come down and sit at the table then Jeza and then their father. Chris took the last open seat next to Amanda. They filled their plates with food and ate in silence. Jeza kept taking glances across the table at Amanda which didn't go unnoticed by Christina. She wondered what their deal was but she didn't say anything. When he finished eating, Robbie Sr. took his plate to the kitchen then went back upstairs to his room without saying a word. Chris wondered how long his depression would last and then she felt like an ass for wondering. It'd only been a day. Robbie finished next and went upstairs but came back down ten minutes later, got his jacket and left. When Jeza finished and went upstairs it left Chris, Amanda and Franco sitting quietly at the dinner table.

"Where's Frannie?" Chris asked breaking the silence.

"With my neighbor. She just got a new dog and Frannie likes to play with her". Franco cleared his throat and got up from the table to take his plate to the kitchen. "You didn't tell me he'd be here" Amanda whispered.

"I….I didn't know he was going to stay for dinner" she said quietly. Franco came back and said that he was going to head out. Chris walked him outside to his car. "Thanks for keeping me company today".

"Anytime" he said leaning against his car. "So, what's the deal with you and her?" he asked referring to Amanda. She put her hands in her pockets and shrugged.

"We're….working on things. We both have….a lot going on so we agreed it's not the best time for a relationship but that's where I'm hoping we end up".

"So have you given anymore thought to my offer?" he said ignoring her saying she hoped for a relationship with Amanda.

"Franco…." He could tell that whatever she was about to say he wasn't going to like it.

"Come on, Christina. We were a good team…..and a good couple" he added.

"Franco that was work" she said firmly. Franco walked around the car to the driver's side. "Ok? Just work. You have to let this go. I'm a lesbian".

"Whatever, that's a cop out" he said opening his car door. "You know you have feelings for me. I don't care what label you put on yourself, we had a connection. For whatever reason, you don't want to admit it". He didn't give her chance to argue. He got in the driver's seat, shut the door and started his car. He pulled away from the curb as Chris walked up the stairs to her front door. She turned back around just in time to see him round the corner and disappear. She went back inside with Amanda and avoided talking about what she'd just argued with Franco about. They cleaned up the dinner dishes together and Amanda agreed to stay the night with her again. They went upstairs to her room and went to bed.

The next day Amanda went to work and Chris stayed at home again. She made phone calls to make sure everything was in order for her mother's funeral services the next day and then went to the store to pick up food for the gathering at the house. Once everything was done, she went upstairs to her room and lounged in her bed. She took a nap and then lounged some more. She didn't feel like cooking anything so she ordered pizza for dinner. They all took their food to their rooms, continuing their day without saying so much as one word to one another. By ten o'clock, they were all asleep. Chris woke up the next morning at eight. She made sure everyone was up before showering and getting dressed. By ten o'clock, they were leaving the house and heading to the church. When Javi and Sophia arrived at the church, Jeza insisted that Chris make room for them on the front row with them. Neither Javi nor Sophia even knew their mother but Jeza was being such a pain in the ass that Chris finally agreed that they could sit up front.

Amanda, Fin, Olivia, Nick, Murphy and Barba arrived at the church and took their seats. They weren't surprised that Chris looked completely together. She wore a black dress that stopped just below her knees and black heels with her hair pulled back and pinned up. She smiled politely at everyone as they entered the church. Franco walked in and barely made eye contact with her. He went over to her father and Jeza and gave his condolences before going inside to find a seat. Beth came as well. She knew what Chris was going through because she'd lost her father not too long ago. Like Chris and her family, she'd been at his bedside with her sister when he passed. She gave her a hug then went inside to wait for the service to start. Most everyone had arrived and it was almost time for the service to start and Robbie was nowhere to be found. Her father was starting to get upset that he couldn't find him. Chris told him to go in the church and sit down and she would find him. She went looking for her brother and found him outside behind the church. She gave him a lecture on what an asshole he was being and how he needed to pull it together.

"You don't wanna do it for me? Fine. Do it for papi" she said. "Get in the church". He fixed his tie and started walking towards the entrance of the church. Chris took a deep breath and followed behind him, walking to the front of the church and taking her seat next to her father.

The service went well, just the way Gloria would've wanted. Chris spent most of it consoling her father. He wasn't even able to make it through the eulogy he'd written. She had to go up to the front and finish it for him. Jeza had Javi to lean on and Robbie sulked on his own. Chris didn't show much emotion at all. The church service ended and they left and headed to the burial grounds. Jeza read something she'd written and they laid white roses on her casket before they watched it lowered into the ground. Everyone had started to go back to their cars but Robbie Sr. stayed there, staring at his wife's grave. Christina stood there with him, silently waiting until he was ready to go. After fifteen minutes, he said his final goodbye and walked to the car with his daughter. They'd invited everyone over to their house for refreshments and to pay their last respects. Chris was inwardly hoping that people wouldn't stay long. Her father looked exhausted so she took him upstairs to let him get some rest. By five thirty in the evening, the only people left at the house were Javi and his mother, her coworkers and Franco. Chris started to clean things up even though Amanda and Nick offered to do it for her. She said she needed something to keep herself busy. Robbie was leaning against the wall and Franco went over and stood next to him.

"How you holding up man?" he asked quietly.

"I'm fine" he said sounding like his sister.

"I know you're gonna miss your mom but you just have to think about what she'd want for you" he said trying to console. "Just think of everything you have to look forward to. I mean, you're gonna be an uncle. That's something right?" Robbie looked at him and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"What are you talking about?" he asked hostilely.

"I…nothing". Chris hadn't said she didn't tell Robbie about Jeza being pregnant so he just assumed he knew. Now he'd opened his mouth and let the cat out of the bag. There wasn't any telling how Robbie would react. All he knew was that it wouldn't be good.

"No, not nothing" he said standing up from leaning against the wall. "What are you talking about?" he asked raising his voice. By this time, he had everyone's attention. Chris came in from the kitchen and asked what was going on. Robbie's mind was turning over what Franco had just said. He knew he only had one sister that would be pregnant. He turned and looked at his youngest sister. "Are you pregnant?" he asked. Jeza sat there quietly, looking terrified. "I asked you a question!" he yelled causing her to flinch.

"Robbie" Chris said from behind him.

"And you knew about this?" he asked turning to his other sister. "When were you going to let me in on this little secret?"

"It wasn't a secret" she said walking over to him. "Can we not talk about this right now?"

"It seems like you've already been talking a hell of a lot with everybody else" he said angrily. "What are you gonna do with a kid?" he asked turning back to Jeza. "You're barely passing high school. What kind of a job are you gonna get with no diploma? How are you gonna provide for this kid? I hope you're not gonna be depending on this clown" he said pointing to Javier.

"Robbie that's enough" Chris said trying to reign him. Everyone else was sitting quietly, uncomfortably watching the exchange.

"No. You're having an abortion and that's the end of it" he said definitively.

"Robbie!" Chris yelled.

"This is all your fault" he said turning to Christina. "And you promised mami that you'd look out for her and make sure she does well for herself. Our mother on her deathbed, you promised her. How about mentioning the fact that it's too late. Her life's already in the drain".

"Robbie come on man" Franco said trying to stand up for Chris.

"And you" Robbie said turning his anger on Franco. "You need to stay out of our family. My sister doesn't love you. She's never going to want to be with you. She's never going to want to marry you or have your babies. So why don't you just get lost?" Franco brought his fist back and then forward, connecting with Robbie's face. They started fighting right there in the living room. Chris yelled at them to stop it. Sophia dragged Javi to the door and forced him to leave the house. Jeza sat on the couch crying. Nick and Murphy were finally able to pull the two of them apart. It was taking everything Chris had within her not to scream out of frustration. Robbie stormed out the house, slamming the door behind him and Jeza ran upstairs to her room. Everything was quiet and no one knew what the next move was.

"I'm sorry" Franco said apologizing. He brought his hand up to touch Chris' shoulder but she slapped his hand away. She stood there for a moment longer before heading up the stairs. She looked into her father's room to check on him and saw that he was fast asleep. She pulled his door closed, careful not to make any noise, then went back downstairs. She went over to the closet, grabbed her coat and put it on. Then she grabbed her purse and said she going to the bar to drink and they were welcome to join her. Before anyone could say anything, she walked out the front door. Amanda was the first to get up from the couch and follow her out of the house. Olivia, Fin and Murphy weren't far behind her. Barba and Nick decided they'd call it a day and head home. Murphy ordered the first round which Chris quickly finished. She ordered a second drink for herself; then a third, a fourth and a fifth.

"Maybe you should slow down" Franco said reaching for her glass. She moved it out of his reach and drank the rest of it down before asking for another. "Christina" he said trying to get her attention. She continued to ignore him. "What would your mother say?"

"Don't you fucking talk to me about my mother" she said harshly. "Entiendes?" the waitress brought her sixth drink and set it down in front of her. She picked it up and took a drink.

"Here we go again" he said throwing his hands up. "I'm the bad guy, right? You're pissed off and you need someone to be take out your frustration on". Chris scoffed and rolled her eyes. "This gonna be a repeat performance of your drunken depression after we got home from the Hoyas, huh?" Chris glared at him from across the table. "Oh, they don't know about that? Hey, stick around" he said looking at Amanda, "you're in for a real treat". Chris sat quietly for a minute stewing over Franco's comment. Then she let go of everything she'd been holding in for over a year.

"That's low" she said taking another drink from her glass. "Even for you. I'm sorry I didn't walk into the squad back in San Bern and think you were god's gift to me. I'm sorry I wasn't like every other female rookie cop that you swindled into bed and then shipped off when you got tired of her. I'm so sorry, Franco, that we were paired together for that case and that I was everything you ever wanted. I'm sorry you fell in love me. I'm sorry I didn't love you back. But it's time for you to get over it. You're not my husband and you never will be. And if you think that my depression", she said using air quotes, "was about you then you're so much more diluted than I could have _ever_ imagined". Franco got up and angrily snatched his jacket from the back of his chair.

"You're an idiot if you think she'll ever love you" he said looking at Amanda. He put on his jacket and walked out of the bar. She picked up her glass and finished her sixth drink. She was about to order another but Murphy stopped her, saying he thought she'd had enough. She stumbled slightly when he helped her up from her seat and led her towards the door. Olivia hailed a cab and Fin helped her inside. Amanda said she'd get her home and get her to bed. She saw that they were concerned but she assured them that she could handle it. She got in the taxi with Chris and headed to her house. When the cab pulled up outside her home, she helped her out of the car and up the front steps. She took her purse and got out her keys, unlocking the door and leading her inside. Chris took off her coat and dropped it on the stair landing before starting up the stairs. Amanda picked her coat up and hung it, along with her own, in the hall closet before going upstairs to Chris' room. They both undressed and climbed into Chris' bed, getting under the covers and settling down to go to sleep. Christina stared at Amanda as she lay next to her, breathing slowly in and out, taking in her features.

"Do you believe him?" she asked softly. Amanda shook her head.

"No" she whispered back. Chris moved closer to Amanda and turned over so that her back was to Amanda's front. She grabbed her arm and pulled it around her waist, interlacing their fingers. She lay there thinking about the last conversation she had with her mother. Her eyes slowly got heavier and heavier until she couldn't hold them open anymore and she drifted off to sleep.

**Spanish-English Translations **

**Nosotros no tenemos padres incumplidores en nuestra familia y nosotros no vamos a empezar con él, claro?"- **We don't have any deadbeat dads in our family and we're not going to start with him, clear?

**Si senora**- Yes ma'am

**Entiendes?**- You understand?


	35. Chapter 35: Back to Normal

Chapter 35: Back to Normal

Amanda left Chris in bed the next morning and went home to get ready for work. Simon Wilkes was testifying in court today and Barba was hopeful that the jury would see things his way. Chris stayed home all day lounging on the couch. Jeza stayed in her room and Robbie hadn't come home the night before. Her father came to her around noon and asked her for the car keys. He wanted to go to the cemetery. Even though her mother's grave stone wasn't laid yet, he wanted to go, put her favorite flowers on her grave and sit with her for a while. She asked if he wanted her to go with him but he said no. He wanted to spend some time alone. She gave him the keys and he went on his way. She called Robbie over and over again but he wouldn't answer her phone calls. Franco called her over and over again but she wouldn't answer his phone calls. She didn't know if they'd ever be able to get past everything that happened the day before. If she was being honest with herself, she didn't really care.

Chris called Amanda and asked her how things were going with the trial. Amanda was still giving her a hard time for worrying about what was going on at work with everything she had going on at home. She told her that work was the only part of her life that wasn't complicated. It was the only thing keeping her sane. Jeza bounded down the stairs in jeans and a pullover and came over to stand in front of her while she was on the phone. She waited for a minute while Chris talked but soon lost her patience.

"Chris" she said lightly kicking her foot.

"What Jeza?"

"I need a ride?" she said tapping her foot.

"A ride where?"

"I have a doctor's appointment, remember?"

"You never told me you have a doctor's appointment, Jeza" she said annoyed. "Anyways, I can't take you. Papa took my car and Robbie's MIA". Jeza groaned in frustration. "Can Sophia take you?"

"I'll call and ask her" she said turning and dragging herself back upstairs. Jeza came back down fifteen minutes later and told her Sophia was there with Javi to take her to the doctor. She asked what she wanted for dinner and received a shrug before she walked out the door. Chris talked to Amanda for a few more minutes then she had to get off the phone. She was in the house all alone with absolutely nothing to do. She laid back and covered her eyes with her arm and went to sleep. She woke up when her father came back. He didn't seem to be as down as he had been the last couple days. He told her not to worry about dinner; that he would be cooking tonight. She almost argued but decided against it. She just said okay and turned over to go back to sleep. She woke up again when she smelled dinner. She knew that smell anywhere. It was her father's spicy chicken and chili; the best kind of comfort food. She suddenly couldn't wait for dinner. She texted Robbie and told him that he should stop being an asshole and come home. Dad was cooking dinner and he didn't want to miss that. She called Jeza as well and told her to come home for dinner too. She asked if Javi could stay and Chris said yes. Next she texted Amanda and told her that her father was making his famous chili and she should come over for dinner if she wasn't going to be working late.

Robbie walked in the house just before six and went upstairs. Jeza walked in with Javi not long after and came into the living room where Chris was sitting. She took a picture of her sonogram and gave it to her look her. She was just nine weeks along so the baby was tiny but it was there and it was beautiful. She smiled and looked at her sister, still having a hard time believing that she was going to be a mom. But the sonogram was a reality check they both needed. Now that Robbie knew about her pregnancy there was just one person left to tell. Chris wasn't looking forward to it but they'd kept it from him long enough.

"We need to tell dad" she said quietly. "Robbie knows now and you know him. He won't be quiet about it. He needs to hear it from you".

"Will you come with me?" she asked. Chris nodded. Jeza took a deep breath, took her sonogram back from her sister and got up from the couch. Chris got up and followed her to the kitchen. Their father turned around when he heard them walk up behind him.

"Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes" he said with a small smile. It was the first smile any of them had seen from him in weeks.

"Dad" Jeza said speaking up, "I want to show you something". She held out the sonogram and he took it from her. He looked at the picture confused for a moment about what he was looking at. Then he realized what it was and looked at his daughter. "I'm pregnant. I'm gonna have a baby" she said quietly. He looked over to Chris seeming to ask for confirmation. She silently nodded her head. He handed the sonogram back to Jeza and turned back to the stove without saying a word. Jeza looked at Chris who gestured for her to go back to the living room. Chris went over and stood next to her father.

"I know this isn't what you want for her" she said softly. "I know this isn't what mom would want for her either" she added. "She would be disappointed and sad that her daughter is a teenager and pregnant and not married. But she wouldn't want her to have an abortion and she wouldn't want her to give the baby up for adoption. As upset and disappointed as she would be and as you are now, mom would support her and love her and she'd be happy to have her first grandchild". She walked away and left him to think about what she'd said. She sat in the living room with Jeza and Javi watching tv waiting for dinner to be ready. Robbie came downstairs and saw them sitting there in the living room. Their father brought the pot of chili to the table followed by the pan of spicy chicken and a plate of wheat tortillas and called them to the table. They all walked over and took their seats. Chris checked her phone for any messages from Amanda. There weren't any. She just assumed that she was still at work. Roberto Sr. said grace before they started filling their plates with food. Robbie was still noticeably upset from everything that'd happened the day before. He held his tongue for as long as he could.

"So are we really not gonna talk about this?" he asked angrily.

"If it's anything else about Jeza having an abortion then there's nothing to talk about" Chris said.

"She's too young to have a baby" he said raising his voice. "What's she gonna do? Drop out of high school to take care of the kid?"

"She can finish high school and have a baby, Robbie. It's not impossible" she said annoyed by his pessimism. It wasn't that she hadn't considered the possibility that Jeza would drop out of school to raise the baby. She'd already decided that wasn't an option. Jeza would finish high school and go to college no matter how hard it was.

"I hope you're not counting on this guy to stick around" he said pointing to Javi.

"Why do you think I'm gonna bail on her?" Javi asked angrily. "You don't even know me, man".

"I don't wanna know you. You're a punk. You got my sister pregnant. I should smash your…."

"That's enough" Robbie Sr. said slamming his fist down on the table. "I don't care how upset you are. You treat your sisters with respect" he said firmly. "Your sister is having a baby and we are all going to support her. Is that clear?"

"Yes sir" he said in defeat. He knew enough not to go against his father.

"Good". He reached to the center of the table and grabbed a tortilla. "Now let's eat" he said picking up his spoon. They ate and Jeza told their father about all the things Sophia had already gotten for the baby. Tears came to his eyes when she told him she wanted to name the baby after their mother if it was a girl. It was the most normal family dinner they'd had since Gloria went into the hospital. Chris hoped that things would continue this way but with her family there were never any guarantees. They finished dinner and cleared the table. For the first time in a long time, Chris didn't clean up alone. When they were finished, Jeza sat outside with Javi while he waited for his mother and Chris, Robbie and their father went up to their rooms. Chris tried calling Amanda but it went straight to voicemail. It wasn't very late but for some reason she was extremely tired. She decided she'd take a bath and go to bed.

The next couple days went by quickly and Chris was finally able to go back to work. Lieutenant Murphy suggested she take some more time. He said there was no reason for her to rush back. Her father and brother were back to work and her sister was back to school. There was nothing for her to do at home but sit alone. She needed to get back to work. Her first day back the jury came back on the Simon Wilkes case with a not guilty verdict. Everyone except Chris seemed to be upset about it. Nick was especially pissed off. When they went to dinner after the verdict, Simon Wilkes walked in with his wife. Amaro had a look on his face that if looks could kill, Simon Wilkes would drop dead right there. They all told him to let it go but Amaro didn't seem like he was going to take their advice. The next day, they found out he hadn't. Amaro was arrested for assaulting Wilkes outside a school. Murphy ordered them to stay out of the investigation and focus on their open cases. They had a case involving a prostitute setting up dates to be raped by her pimp. During the investigation they found out the prostitute, Ellie, was the mother of the baby they'd found during another investigation. She agreed to testify against her pimp in exchange for help getting clean, off the streets, and working towards getting custody of her son back.

Even though Murphy told them to stay out of the investigation into Amaro's actions, Amanda was working to get him cleared. At the very least she wanted them to lower the charges so he didn't spend any time in jail. She went to chat rooms that Wilkes visited and pretended to be another user and chatted with him. She was online for hours chatting with him about his sick fantasies about little boys and planned to offer him child pornography. Chris couldn't sleep so she went over to Amanda's apartment to talk to her. They sat in her living room and talked about the case they were working on. Somehow they started talking about Nick. Chris thought he deserved whatever was coming to him for being so stupid. Amanda, of course, defended him. Chris didn't understand it.

"He almost beat a man to death" she reminded her.

"A child abuser" she said as if that made it okay.

"Simon Wilkes has never hurt a child and a jury acquitted him. And if he had hurt a child, that doesn't excuse what Amaro did".

"He lost his temper…."

"How can you defend him?" she asked her confused. She didn't think there were any excuses for what Nick had done. "He assaulted a man. Period. He should face the same consequences as any other person who assaults someone. No, you know what" she said changing her mind about her statement, "he should be held to a higher standard. Nick is a cop and Simon Wilkes may think about doing unspeakable things to children, but only one of them broke the law". Amanda couldn't argue with her. Nick told her that he was one to throw the first punch. But she'd been chatting with Simon Wilkes and the things he thought about turned her stomach. Not only that but she'd gotten close to Nick over the past couple of months and she didn't think he was a bad guy. She definitely didn't want to see him go to jail. Chris saw how personally Amanda was taking this whole thing with Amaro. She'd been suspicious of the two of them for a while now. "What's going on with you two?"

"What are you talking about?" Amanda asked. She and Nick were working hard to keep their relationship under wraps.

"I mean, what's going on with you and Amaro?" she asked. Amanda didn't say anything. "A few months ago you couldn't stand the guy. I mean, you told me about how pissed off you were when he interfered when you were with Nate and…"

"Yeah, well we've moved past that" she said cutting her off.

"Obviously" she shot back. "So how long have you two been sleeping together?" she asked. Amanda hesitated to answer. "Come on, Amanda, tell me".

"Almost two months" she answered. Chris scoffed.

"Really? So this whole time that we've been talking about working on us and you've been staying the night with me, you've been sleeping with him?"

"Chris…."

"I don't understand, Amanda. I thought you wanted to get back together".

"I do" she said quickly.

"But you're having sex with Nick?" She wasn't used to being jealous or even remotely upset about things like this. But here she was both jealous and upset. "Am I wasting my time? I mean, trying to work things out between us? Because I have no problem moving on".

"You're not wasting your time" Amanda said firmly. "I do want to work things out with us but I told you that I'm trying to focus on working my program".

"So you can't be with me while you're trying to focus on your program but you can be with Nick?" Amanda could hear how bad that sounded.

"It's not like that" she said starting to explain.

"No, it's fine. I got it" Chris said offended. She grabbed her keys and phone from the table, got up from the couch and headed for the door. Amanda got up and followed her.

"Chris wait" she said trying to stop her from leaving.

"He was stalking you" she said turning around to face her. Amanda got a deer in the headlights look on her face. "Oh, what? He didn't tell you?" she asked sarcastically. "He didn't tell you that when you were undercover with Murphy he tracked your phone and followed you to that illegal gambling club? This is what he does Amanda. He's crazy. Going to that AA meeting to check into Nate, following you, assaulting Wilkes. The guy has no sense of boundaries. I heard about what happened with his wife; how she came at him in the squad room. You think he was stalking her too?"

"Christina…."

"No Amanda" she said stopping her from saying anything. "You want to be with an annoying, violent stalker then you go right ahead. I'm done". She turned around and walked out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her. Amanda groaned in frustration. She thought about going after her but she knew it was useless. She went back to the chat room where she corresponded with Wilkes all night. The next day, thanks to Munch, Amaro was released on bail. Olivia and Amanda were there to meet him but Amanda left to see Wilkes' wife. She told her about the chat room and the photos she'd offered Wilkes and threatened to have him arrested for downloading child porn if he didn't change his story about what happened with Nick. She hoped this wouldn't backfire but she had to try. She found out later that it'd worked. Simon Wilkes admitted that he threw the first punch and they would be reducing the charges against Amaro. Amanda acted surprised and everyone except Chris seemed pleased with the news. She couldn't care less whether he ended up in jail or not.

During the drama with Amaro, their case against the pimp, Little Tino, fell apart when their witness was murdered. They knew he wasn't running things but without Ellie, they didn't have much of a case. With things wrapped up with that case and Amaro's, Murphy said his goodbyes. Sergeant Benson was in charge of the unit again. Sergeant Munch said his goodbyes again. Chris was glad to have met him. She only wished that she'd gotten the chance to work with him. He seemed like a great man to work with and learn from. They only thing she didn't understand about him was his affinity for Amaro. Amongst all the bad that happened, something good came out of it. The judge presiding over Baby Noah's case offered to grant custody on a trial basis. She would be his foster parent for year at which time she could petition for adoption. They were all happy for her. It didn't take a genius to see she was crazy about that baby from the moment she laid eyes on him. Chris thought it was great to see something so good come out of the job they did. She was happy to be back at work. Things felt like they were getting back to normal.


	36. Chapter 36: Complications

Chapter 36: Complications

The squad room was different without Amaro there. Chris didn't mind at all except for the extra work they all had to take on because they were down a detective. Amanda was particularly annoying with asking when he'd be allowed back. After he'd assaulted Simon Wilkes, he'd been taken down to beat cop and ordered into anger management. It'd been a few months and she was bugging Sergeant Benson about getting one pp to let him back in the unit. She kept saying she was doing her best. To pick up the slack, Benson had requested a new detective and he finally arrived. His name was Sonny Carisi. He was a bit eccentric for their taste and he wasn't exactly SVU issue but they needed the extra help. After seeing Nick while picking up a witness in the Ellie Porter case, Amanda started in again about when he'd be able to come back. Olivia said, again, that she was working on it but in the meantime she was in charge of showing Carisi the ropes. Chris joked that they were like a bickering brother and sister pair. One was always trying to get a point over the other. She knew Amanda didn't really like him so she got a kick out of picking on her about the two of them.

They finally closed the Ellie Porter case which Olivia was really happy about. They'd found the man who ordered Noah's mother killed and shut down a sex trafficking operation in the process. Carisi was getting settled in but he and Rollins still weren't really getting along. Chris and Amanda weren't really on speaking terms but they kept things professional. Chris didn't know if Amanda was still seeing Nick and she was trying really hard not to care. She'd gone back to being her old self; no relationships, no strings. It was what always worked out best for her. She was sitting at her desk finishing up her fives for a case she'd gotten with Carisi when Beth walked into the squad. She didn't notice it but Amanda was obviously not happy to see her there. She waited while Chris finished up and turned in her fives to the Sergeant then they left the squad together. Amanda didn't feel the best about how they'd ended things. It hadn't been her choice to stop working on their relationship but Chris had made up her mind. She thought that Amanda being with Nick only proved what she'd thought all along; that she was just an experiment. She hoped eventually they could at least be friends.

Another month went by and Nick was finally allowed to come back to SVU. He could sense a different vibe from Chris, like she liked him even less now than before. She was able to work with him but she didn't want to be his friend. She honestly just didn't like him. It had nothing to do with his relationship with Amanda. She hadn't liked him even before she knew they were together and she didn't think it would change. It still bothered her that he and Amanda were together but she didn't let it show. She did what she always had done; played the field; no feelings, no strings. She almost faltered when Amanda was in a hostage situation with a suspect but Nick, of course, was there to come to her rescue. She didn't need her. Amanda tried to talk to her but Chris always kept it short. She came in to work every day, did her job then went home to her family. Jeza was getting further along and had to start accelerating her classes so she wouldn't get behind after she had the baby. She was proud of her sister for staying in school and proud of Javi for sticking around. He went to every checkup with her that he could and got a job after school. Robbie was still upset but he was getting over it. And Robbie Sr. was really looking forward to being a grandpa. He bought a crib and put it together for Jeza. He decorated it himself and left a spot so he could paint on the baby's name once Jeza and Javi settled on one. They didn't know if they were having a boy or girl yet and wouldn't until the baby was born. They wanted it to be a surprise. Amanda would ask how Jeza was doing. Chris would say she was fine and not much else.

Olivia paired them up together more often hoping they would work out their issues. They rode in silence most of the time unless they were talking about a case. Chris was professional, maybe a little too professional. Amanda couldn't believe she wouldn't have a normal conversation with her. It was like they never cared about each other. It was a lot more awkward when work took them to Chicago and they had to share a hotel room. Chris did as much as she could to avoid Amanda. When they broke for the night, she didn't even come back to the room until she was ready to go to sleep. She came in, changed her clothes and got in bed without saying a word. Amanda wanted to throw a pillow at her head but she just laid down and went to sleep. They went back to New York and continued with business as usual. Jeza was having terrible morning sickness and then she had a fainting spell at school. They called an ambulance and had her taken to the hospital. Chris went there to see her. The doctor said her blood pressure was higher than he would like. He gave her some medication to bring it down, gave her a blood pressure monitor so she could keep track of her pressures and ordered her on bed rest. They said it wasn't serious enough for her to be admitted and sent her home. She had to regularly check her blood pressure, take her medication, and schedule a follow up with her primary OB.

Chris went to her school the next morning and got her work from all of her teachers then took it back to her at home. She'd made meals and snacks for her so wouldn't have to be on her feet. She could just go to the frig, get her food and sit back down. She set her up in the living room on the couch, gave her the remote, and moved the table closer to her for all her books. She sat her monitor on the table with the journal she needed to keep a record of her pressures next to it. Jeza practically had to get up and push Chris out the door. She offered one last time to take the day off from work to stay home with her. Jeza said no. The doctor told her to avoid stress and her fussing was making her crazy. It turned out that Jeza was dealing with her pregnancy complications a lot better than Chris was. Chris finally left and went to work. She was late but she'd called ahead and explained the situation to Benson who told her to take her time. She walked into the squad room at nine thirty and went to sit down at her desk.

"Hey" Carisi said, "How's your sister doing?" he asked. "The Sarg said something happened with her. The baby alright?" Chris nodded her head.

"Yeah. The baby's fine" she said. "Just a little scare; high blood pressure. She's home though. We just have to keep a close eye on it is all".

"That's good". Chris got up and went to get herself some coffee. Amanda came over to talk to her. Their relationship had been complicated since their break up and even more so now that Chris knew about her and Nick. She was still hopeful that they could fix things between them.

"So your sister, she's gonna be okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, she's gonna be fine". Chris took her usual six packets of sugar and dumped it into the bottom of her coffee cup then poured in coffee. She took a stirrer and mixed her coffee.

"And the baby's healthy?"

"Yep" she said simply.

"Are you ever gonna talk to me like we've done more than just work together for the past year?" Amanda asked annoyed with Chris' attitude. Chris threw her stirrer in the trash, took her coffee and went back to her desk leaving Amanda standing there alone. Amanda went back to her desk and got back to work. The next day they found a video online of a star football player and his girlfriend in what looked like a domestic dispute. Benson ordered them to check it out before it hit mainstream media. It turned out that it had been a domestic dispute and football player AJ Martin had knocked out his longtime girlfriend and dragged her, unconscious, across a parking garage. His girlfriend, Paula Bryant, wasn't filing a complaint but Benson wanted to go ahead with the investigation and bring charges against AJ. She got Barba on board and they moved forward even though they didn't have a complaining witness. Over the next couple days, there was a lot of disagreement in the squad room about whether or not they were overstepping their bounds. Paula wanted to stay with her now husband and Rollins thought she should be able to make that decision for herself. Benson and Amaro disagreed and thought that, even though Paula didn't want to press charges, it was up to them to save her from an abusive relationship. Fin and Chris kept their opinions close to the vest.

Chris had a day off and when she came back to work, there was a lot of tension between Amanda and Nick. She asked Fin what was going on and he said he didn't know but he was trying to stay out of it. He kept the part about advising Amanda to keep her personal and professional relationships separate to himself. Not too long ago, he'd told Chris to give her and Amanda a shot. Now he was seeing that he'd been right in all his years of thinking that mixing the two was a bad idea. Things weren't working out and it was starting to take a toll on how they worked together. He still thought that things might work out between Chris and Amanda if they'd both stop being so stubborn and apologize to each other. But he didn't want to get in the middle of anything. The trail against AJ Martin continued and Paula decided to take the stand to defend her husband and her relationship. Next were closing statements then waiting for the jury's verdict. There were still disagreements about whether they were doing the right thing inferring but there was no going back now. The jury came back with a guilty verdict and though, Paula Martin wasn't happy with the outcome, Barba assured Olivia that they'd done the right thing.

Over the next couple days, Amanda tried harder to talk to Christina. She wanted to ask her to go out to dinner but Chris was still avoiding her. The next day, Beth met her at the precinct and they left together again. Fin could see that Amanda was trying but Chris wasn't giving her the time of day. He wanted to help her out but he'd told her it wasn't a good idea to date anyone from work. But for some reason he felt different about her and Chris together than he felt about her with Amaro. He decided if the opportunity came up for him to push them back together he'd take it. In the meantime, Amanda tried on her own to get Chris' attention. She called and texted. She would answer but would always rush her off the phone and always kept their texts short and sweet. After a few more days, Amanda gave up. Chris was over her and she figured she might as well accept it and move on. Chris had the next couple days off and they got a new case in that reminded Rollins of one back in Atlanta. She made a call back to her old Captain to see if they had anything that could help them with their case. When he called back, it turned out they had three open cases matching their MO but the rape kits had never been tested. Benson sent Rollins and Fin down to Atlanta to track the kits down so they could be tested and talk to the women who'd filed the complaints. The trip was stirring up a lot for Amanda and she couldn't wait to get back to New York. The victim they'd talked to from Atlanta gave them the break that they needed. It led them to a doctor which led them to the perp. Carisi was able to get a confession out of the guy and they closed the case. Fin could sense that something was up with Rollins since their visit to her old job and a weird phone call she had with her old chief. He asked if she was okay and she said she was good. He wasn't sure she was telling the truth but he didn't push it.

Chris came back to work after a couple days off taking care of her sister. Amanda pretended she wasn't there and Chris did the same. They both tended to their own work. Amanda had a lot on her mind and she wasn't focusing on Chris anymore. Chris had a lot on her mind as well and she hadn't been focusing on Amanda since she found out she was sleeping with Nick. She suspected from how they were acting around each other that things between them had ended. It didn't matter. She didn't trust Amanda's feelings for her so she couldn't be with her. Over the next couple weeks, Amanda got more and more anxious. It was subtle but Chris noticed. She'd had the same behavior at the start of their undercover operation. She didn't know what her deal was but she was sure she'd find out soon enough. There was a conference in town that night and Amanda's old squad from Atlanta was there. Chris couldn't go because she had to go home and take care of her sister but Benson, Tutuola, Amaro and Rollins went. The next morning, Amanda came in late and Chris could tell she was hung over. Before she could sit down at her desk, Fin got a call that a detective from Atlanta had been raped. Rollins went to the hospital with Liv and the rest of them stayed back at the precinct.

Things got complicated quickly and Rollins was put in a tough position. She'd told Chris before about how she'd been assaulted on the job back home but she'd never gone into much detail. Seeing how she was now with these accusations being leveled against her old boss made Chris question if he'd been the one who hurt Amanda. She thought about trying to talk to her about it but Fin had it covered. He got Amanda to go to Barba and vouch for the veracity of the accusation against Chief Patton. She wasn't telling the entire truth about what happened to her but just enough for them to move forward with the charges against him. Once the trial started and the victim, Detective Reese Taymor, had testified, Amanda decided it was time for her to tell her whole story. The truth was out there about what'd happened to her in Atlanta and why she'd left. It was uncomfortable for her but it was time. She couldn't hide it anymore. It turned out that Rollins wasn't allowed to testify against Patton but it wasn't all for nothing. It felt good to have finally gotten it off her chest; to finally tell someone what happened and have them believe her. She still had her issues to work through to be okay with happened and move on but at least now she wasn't pretending that nothing had happened at all.

Chief Patton ended up taking a plea and Amanda decided to take some time off. Chris went back and forth with herself about whether she should talk to her. She'd kept her distance during Patton's trial. She didn't want to crowd her. She had Fin to talk to and Nick and she overheard her telling Fin that Benson wanted her to see a therapist. She figured she'd just give her some space. She was in a daze at the table making herself a cup of coffee when Fin came over and stood next to her. She didn't notice him there until her nudged her arm with his elbow. She snapped out of her daze and said good morning. He returned the greeting then got right to the point.

"You talked to Amanda?" She shook her head.

"No" she said as she reached for a stirrer.

"Why not?" he asked with a bit of anger in his voice.

"She's…taking time off" she said stating what he already knew. "I just thought I'd give her her space".

"Maybe she doesn't want space" he said, "Maybe she wants to talk to you. You know she has been trying but you've been ignoring her".

"She hasn't tried to talk to me for weeks" Chris said defensively.

"Yeah. You were ignoring her so she gave up".

"I wasn't ignoring her….."

"You were acting like you didn't want to talk to her. It's the same thing". Chris threw her stirrer in the trash and stood there listening to Fin lecture her about how she'd been treating Amanda. "When are you gonna stop pretending like you don't care?" he asked her bluntly. "Maybe that's what she's really waiting on". He walked away and left her standing there alone like she'd done to Amanda not too long ago. He was right. She was pretending and maybe it was time for her to face reality.


	37. Chapter 37: Start of Something Good

Chapter 37: Start of Something Good

Chris went home after work that day still thinking about what Fin said to her. She put dinner on the stove then went to check Jeza's journal. Her blood pressure was responding to the medication the doctor had given her and she was feeling a lot better. She had a doctor's appointment the next day. Sophia had agreed to take her since Chris had to work. Javi wouldn't be able to go with her this time because it was during school and he couldn't miss much more class. Jeza was hoping that the doctor would say she didn't have to be on bed rest anymore and could go back to school. Her father suggested that she leave school early and stay home until the baby was born but both she and Chris disagreed. She'd have a hard enough time keeping up with her school work after the baby was born so Chris thought she needed to stay in school for as long as she could. Jeza was more worried about time with her friends than keeping up in school. When Robbie got home from work they sat down to eat dinner. There was a light conversation going but Chris wasn't really participating. Robbie Sr. noticed that his daughter was distracted.

"Lo qué está mal, mija?" he asked. She didn't respond so he reached over and tapped her shoulder. She looked over at him. "Lo qué está mal?" he asked again.

"Nada" she said softly.

"Venga, hable con su padre".

"Es nada" she said again. "Just work" she lied. She wasn't used to talking to her father about her relationship problems. She'd never really had any relationship problems to talk to him about. Now the thought of talking to him about her and Amanda felt unusual. He gave her the usual speech about how she worked too hard and should take a vacation. They finished dinner and Robbie took care of cleaning up. Chris went upstairs and started to get ready for bed but she couldn't stop thinking about Amanda. Fin's question kept playing over and over in her head: "When are you gonna stop pretending like you don't care?" The answer finally came to her. She put her clothes and shoes back on and went downstairs. She got her coat from the closet and grabbed her keys from the table and went for the door.

"Where are you going?" Jeza asked as she opened the door.

"Out". She closed the door behind her and went to her car to make the drive over to Amanda's. She thought she should call first but she forgot her phone at home. She just kept driving instead of going back to get it and hoped that Amanda would be home. She parked her car and went upstairs to Amanda's apartment. She knocked on the door and waited anxiously for her to answer. She was about to walk away when she heard the lock turn and the door open. Amanda was standing there in shorts and a tank top. Her eyes wandered over her body for a moment before coming back to meet her eyes. "Hi" she said softly.

"Hey" Amanda said back.

"I'm sorry to just drop by. I was gonna call first but I left my phone at home" she explained. Amanda just stood there not saying anything. Chris felt like an idiot. "I'll just go and come back when it's a bet…."

"No" Amanda said stopping her. "It's fine. Come in". She stepped to the side and opened the door wider for Chris to come in. She walked into the apartment and was greeted by Frannie. Amanda closed and locked the door.

"Hey, Frannie" she said kneeling down to pet her. "I missed you". Frannie seemed to have missed her too. She licked her face and wagged her tail.

"Did you come just to play with Frannie?" Amanda asked. Chris rubbed Frannie's head one more time before standing up.

"No" she said softly. She walked past her and went to sit on the couch. Chris followed. They sat awkwardly for a moment, neither of them saying anything. "How are you doing?" Chris asked breaking the silence. Amanda shrugged.

"Fine".

"Really?" she asked. She couldn't imagine that she was fine with everything that had come out over the last week. She just shrugged her shoulders again. "I'm sorry" she said abruptly. "I know I haven't really….been around these last couple months but I should've been there for you _this_ week and I wasn't. I'm sorry" she said again. Amanda didn't say anything. She figured that wasn't all Chris had come over to say. She planned to just sit and listen. "I don't know how to do this Amanda. I know I keep saying that but it's true. I just…I don't know. I haven't counted on anyone but myself for a long time. I've always kept people at a distance because it was easier than letting them in and risking getting hurt. I did the same thing to you. I kept you at arm's length. I….I pushed you away because...I was afraid. I've always been the one to hurt feelings; to break hearts. I was afraid that you'd be the one to break mine. I don't want to be that person anymore. I don't wanna be afraid anymore. I don't want to push you away or keep you at a distance. I miss you" she said softly. "And I miss Frannie" she said with light laugh. "I love you, Amanda". It was the first time she'd said those words to anyone outside of her family. It was scary as hell but she was ready to stop pretending and face the truth. She was in love. "I just hope you'll give me another chance to prove to you that I'm….I'm not always such an asshole" she joked. Amanda laughed. She was never good at being serious for very long. Her laughter subsided and Chris sat and waited for her to say something. After a minute she still hadn't said anything. "I understand, ummm, if you need some time to think about it or…." Amanda moved forward and brought their lips together. It'd been a long time since she'd felt her lips and they still felt amazing to her.

"I love you too" she said softly. Chris breathed a sigh relief that she hadn't just said all that and made a fool of herself. She kissed her again then Frannie jumped up on the couch and started to lick Chris' face again. "Frannie loves you too" Amanda said with a laugh. Chris laughed as Frannie settled into her lap. She always did think that she was her human pillow. Chris stayed and talked to Amanda for a couple hours before heading home. They decided a sleep over right away was probably not a good idea. Amanda still had a lot to work through and Chris had her usual family issues to deal with but they were both ready to be there for each other. Christina never imagined that moving to New York would cause more problems than the ones she brought with her. It'd been a ride full of ups and down, good and bad. But it felt like she was finally turning a corner. She could feel that this was the start of something really good.


	38. Chapter 38: More Undercover Blues

**AN: Hey! I know it's been a long time. Here's a new chapter for y'all. More to come. As always leave your reviews/comments and suggestions. I read them all and appreciate them very much. Hope you enjoy! **

Chapter 38: More Undercover Blues

Amanda took a trip to Costa Rica for her vacation. She needed some time away from everyone to deal with everything that'd come out over the last couple weeks and find her focus again. Even though she and Chris had worked things out before she left, they didn't talk while she was gone. She didn't talk to anyone. She cut herself off from New York and Atlanta and really used the time to work through her issues. Chris took care of Frannie while she was gone. She also had her sister to worry about. She was getting closer to her due date and her blood pressure was starting to spike again. After the third day with a high pressure and no more improvement with the medication, her doctor decided it was time for her to stay in the hospital. She was only twenty eight weeks along and they wanted her to make it to, at least, thirty two weeks before she delivered. If they didn't get her blood pressure under control, they'd have to deliver for both hers and the baby's safety. Chris went to her school, got her work and took it to her at the hospital. She'd found a tutor that'd be able to come to the hospital and help her when she needed. They were both determined for her to graduate on time.

With everything going on with her sister, Chris was still going to work every day. She'd already taken a lot of time off and didn't want to take anymore. Amanda was back from Costa Rica and the squad was complete again. It'd been a while since all five of them were at work at the same time. One of them was always off for one reason or another. They all had to admit it was nice to have the entire team. They also had to admit that it was nice to have everyone on speaking terms. Amanda and Nick had worked out whatever their issues were and Amanda and Chris were dating again. They pretty much started from the beginning, going out to lunch and dinner, walks in the park with Frannie, drinks on the weekend. Amanda was doing really well. She was going to GA meetings and cut back on her drinking which did wonders for her punctuality. They were working like a well-oiled machine, closing case after case. They had a couple on their plates that weren't turning up many leads and those would sometimes go on the back burner for the bigger cases; the ones that required the entire team. One of those bigger cases brought Declan Murphy back into their squad room. They were doing an undercover op to return a sixteen year old sex traffic victim to her mother. He was undercover as a trafficker. He seemed to be in pretty deep and didn't want any help getting out. They made his arrest look good so as to not blow his cover then botched the case on a bad search and cut him loose. They found the girl they were looking for and others and arrested a major trafficker. His arrest brought some shocking news to Benson's door and she was stressed trying to figure out what to do about it. A talk with Barba relieved her anxiety and all was well again.

The weekend rolled around and they all had days off. They were on call, of course, but they had their days to do with what they wanted. Amanda and Chris decided on a relaxing day. They stayed in to watch movies all day except for taking Frannie out a few times for a walk. Chris made breakfast, they grabbed lunch while they were out with Frannie and brought it back, and then Chris made stir fry for dinner. They watched Dirty Dancing, I Am Sam, Remember the Titans, and decided to finish the night watching both the Hunger Games movies. Amanda hadn't seen either nor had she read the books.

"Not surprising" Chris said, "You don't strike me as the type to read".

"I read" Amanda said offended.

"I'm not talking about case files" Chris joked. Amanda laughed and slapped her lightly on the thigh.

"Neither am I" she said. "It just has to be a good book. If it doesn't get my attention by the end of the first chapter, I most likely won't finish it".

"Well The Hunger Games Trilogy is pretty good. You should read it" she recommended.

"You've read them?" She nodded.

"All three". The first movie ended and she got up to put in Catching Fire. "Why don't we make this a regular thing?" she asked. "I recommend to you a good book that I've read and you recommend to me a good book that you've read. Then when we're done we can talk about them". She went back over and got on the couch. Amanda repositioned herself so they could lie down.

"Start our own book club?" Chris nodded again. "Ok". She reached for the remote and pressed play on the movie. They were both fast asleep before it was over. Amanda woke up the next morning a little after nine. She moved carefully off the couch so she didn't wake Christina and went into the bedroom to brush her teeth and wash her face. She threw on some clothes, put Frannie on her leash and headed out to get them breakfast. When she got back, Chris was in the shower. She bought coffee and donuts and set it on the living room table then went into the bathroom. She took her clothes off and joined her girlfriend in the shower. If the water weren't doing it already, they'd be steaming up the glass doors. They finally got out of the shower after an hour and fifteen minutes and drank their, now cold, coffee. They had no plans for the day, so they lounged around until late afternoon then decided to go to the dog park. Frannie got to run around with the other dogs and Amanda and Chris got to enjoy a nice day out, uninterrupted by any work emergencies. They stopped on the way home to eat dinner and turned in early for bed. They were both woken up early by a call from Sgt Benson saying they had a case. They got up, got dressed, made sure Frannie was set with food and water then headed out. Since they were dating again, Benson had to split them up on cases. She sent Amanda to the hospital to meet her and Fin and Chris to the scene with Amaro and Carisi. They all met up at the station later to discuss the case, interview witnesses and plan their next moves for the investigation. The case wasn't very strong. They had the victim's statement but not much else. There wasn't any physical evidence from the rape kit and the victim couldn't give a very detailed discription of her attacker. Then another woman, with the same story, came into another ER to report. It was unfortunate for her but fortunate for their case. She'd managed to scratch her attacker and they were able to get his DNA from under her fingernails. She was also able to give a description of a tattoo on his right forearm. They canvassed tattoo parlors with the sketches of the man and his tattoo. It took three days of canvassing but they got their guy. His DNA came back a match from the fingernail scrapings on the second victim and both women were able to pick him out of a lineup. Barba didn't have any worries about getting conviction.

It was another day at SVU, business as usual. Everyone had their individual cases to work and paperwork to get done. They had their usual banter back and forth as they tried to decide what to do for lunch. Their conversation came to a screeching halt when a face they hadn't seen in months walked through the doors with two important looking suits in tow. Carisi was confused about why everyone was staring at him but he didn't ask any questions. He just waited quietly to see how things would play out. He didn't acknowledge anyone and neither did the men he'd walked in with. He just walked over to Benson's office and knocked on the door. Once they were inside with the door shut, Carisi decided to speak up.

"Hey" he said leaning over to Chris, "Who's that?"

"Uh, he's, uh, he used to be a friend" she said hesitantly.

"He worked here or something?" he asked looking to his other teammates.

"Hell no" Fin answered quickly. Chris laughed to herself.

"No. We worked together back in California" she explained.

"Oh, I see" he said expressing his understanding. "So you got transferred here together?"

"No" Amaro said jumping in. "He followed her here like a lost puppy". The door to Olivia's office opened and she appeared in the doorway.

"Reyes" she said getting her attention before gesturing for her to come into her office. Chris sighed and got up from her desk, heading over to the Sergeant's office. Olivia stepped back in behind her and shut the door again. They all looked in the office through the open blinds, trying to get a feel for the conversation happening inside. After a few minutes, they heard raised voices and knew whatever the talk was about, it wasn't anything good. The raised voices quieted down again and ten minutes later the door to Benson's office opened and the familiar face and the two suited sidekicks left the squad room again. A couple minutes after that, Chris stormed angrily out of the Sergeant's office.

"Chris" Amanda called to her. She stood up from her desk when she just kept walking. "Christina" she called to her again. She was about to follow her but Sergeant Benson spoke up.

"Let her go" she said, "she needs a couple minutes to calm down". Amanda looked in the direction that her girlfriend had just gone, wanting to go after her. But she listened to Olivia and willed herself back to her seat.

"What's going on, Sarg?" Carisi asked interested in what was happening.

"Uh, we'll talk about it when Reyes gets back" she said. She went back into her office and shut the door.

"I don't like this" Fin said after her door was closed.

"Me either" Nick said agreeing with him. The mood was sour and there was a slight tension in the air that wouldn't go away until they knew what was going on. Five minutes later, Chris came back into the squad room and went to her desk. Amanda got up and went over to her.

"Hey" she said getting her attention, "what's going on? Why was Franco here?" Before she could answer, Benson's door opened and she called them all into her office. They filed in and Carisi, the last one into the office, shut the door behind him.

"Uh, so here's the deal" she said starting to explain their visitors, "Chris is gonna be on loan to Brooklyn narcotics for a while".

"What?" Amanda asked surprised. "What for?"

"They're working on a major bust. They already have some undercovers in and they've asked specifically for her help" she explained.

"You mean Franco asked specifically for her help" she said rolling her eyes.

"Didn't seem like they were doing much asking" Fin said chiming in. Chris just stood there quietly and let Olivia do all the talking.

"They asked but, you know, in the way that we know it wasn't really a request. This is coming down from One PP. They want her on this case".

"They don't have enough narcotics detectives over there in Brooklyn? They gotta mooch off of our team?" Carisi asked annoyed. He didn't know the situation with this Franco guy but he didn't really need to. He didn't like him walking in here with g men like he owned the place, ordering one of his teammates to go undercover with him.

"Uh, they had a female detective under….." she paused bracing herself for the reactions she was going to get. She was sure they wouldn't be much different from the one Christina had, "but they've lost contact with her. So they want…." She tried to continue quickly on but, of course, was cut off mid-sentence.

"What, she's missing?" Amaro asked. Olivia hesitated to answer.

"Yes" she finally answered. "It's been almost three months since she checked in with her handler". They all started talking at once, voicing their objections to Chris being sent undercover to replace a detective that went missing under the same people she was about to go work for. Chris just continued to stand there quietly as they all complained. "Guys!" Olivia said loudly getting them to stop talking.

"Let me guess" Fin said wanting to get one last thought out, "Franco was her handler". Olivia's silence answered his question. They all let out frustrated sighs and grumbled under their breaths.

"I know this isn't what anyone wants but it's out of my hands. Chris _will_ be going undercover" she said firmly. "Now I got them to agree to allow us to put in with Franco as her handlers. She'll be checking in with one us every two weeks until this thing is over. And Franco will be keeping us up to date on her status on his check ins".

"Two weeks?" Nick asked, "They already have an officer missing and they're willing to risk going two weeks until a check in".

"I was lucky to get that. They wanted to do once a month" she said putting things into perspective.

"So they really think it's gonna take that long?" Carisi asked.

"Yeah, they do". They stood there quietly letting the information they'd just gotten sink in.

"So when does she leave?" Amanda asked breaking the silence.

"Tonight" Olivia said simply. They all looked at Christina and she had a blank expression on her face. As hard as they were taking it, she must've been taking it one hundred times harder.

"Hey" Nick said getting her attention, "You're gonna be alright. You know what you're doing". She just nodded her head.

"Yeah" Fin said chiming in. "Don't worry about a thing. We've got your back. You miss one check in, even one minute late, and we're gonna be on Franco's ass like white on rice". She couldn't help but to laugh. He'd successfully lightened the mood in the room but there was still a tension in Amanda that everyone noticed. She wasn't at all okay with this. Neither was Christina. But they didn't have a choice in the matter. Orders were orders and One PP was dishing them out without regard for them once again. They'd just have to make the best of it, same as always.

They left the Sergeant's office and went back to their desks. Chris started to gather her things to head over to Brooklyn narcotics. She had to be brought up to speed on everything about the case in a matter of hours before assuming her undercover identity. She put on her jacket and shouldered her bag before walking over to Amanda and sitting in the chair next to her desk. She sat silently for a minute while she watched Amanda play solitaire. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"You wanna come over for dinner tonight?" she asked.

"I thought you were leaving tonight?" she asked finally making eye contact with her.

"Yeah well, you know me" she said with a shrug. "I have to break the rules somehow". A small smile graced Amanda's lips and Chris felt herself relax just slightly. "So I'll see you at dinner?" Amanda nodded silently. Chris took her hand on top of the desk and gave it a squeeze. She sat there quietly for a minute longer before taking another deep breath. Without a word, she got up from her chair and left the precinct to delve back into the world of undercover narcotics; one she thought she'd left behind in California.


	39. Chapter 39: Breaking the News

Chapter 39: Breaking the News

After spending a few hours at Narcotics being brought up to speed on the case Christina headed home to her family for dinner. Franco's Captain wanted her to leave right away to assume her undercover identity but she refused. She said they were already imposing on her enough by forcing her into this. They weren't about to screw her out of the chance to explain things to her family and say goodbye. He could see she wasn't going to budge so he said she could go but she was to report back at ten o'clock sharp. She'd planned to interact with Franco as little as possible before she learned what his real role in the operation would be. He knew she wasn't happy to hear the entire story but she'd have to get over it. She didn't have a choice. This was the job and she had to do it.

She walked through the front door, dreading the conversation she had to have with her dad, brother and especially her sister. Jeza was almost eight months along. She'd hate it if she missed the birth of her first niece or nephew. She knew Jeza wouldn't take it well, but there was nothing she could do. She couldn't promise her that things would work out and that she'd be back in time to see the baby born. She didn't know how long this thing would last. They would just have to make the best of it, same as always. Her father was already in the kitchen cooking dinner and Robbie was finishing setting the table. He'd come around a lot in the last few months of Jeza's pregnancy. He was helping her out around the house and driving her to doctor's appointments. He'd even bought some toys and clothes for the baby. He and Javi were getting along more which made Jeza really happy. Robbie had grown up a lot since their mother died and Chris couldn't be happier with him.

Amanda got to the house just after seven with Frannie Mae. She was so fascinated with Jeza. She'd always go right over to her and inspect her belly. When they sat down at the table, Frannie laid down next to Jeza's chair. They all loved both Amanda and Frannie and treated them like family. It was like they'd been around for years. They enjoyed the dinner their father had made and talked about their days. Finally, it was time for Chris to break the news. She took a drink of her water and took a deep breath then cleared her throat to speak.

"So, listen" she said nervously, "I, ummm, I'm gonna be going away for a while….for work". Robbie Sr., Robbie Jr, and Jeza all looked at her confused.

"What do you mean "away"?" Robbie asked. "Away where?"

"Uh, I can't say" she said softly.

"So you two going off again, just like that?" he asked.

"No" Chris said, "Amanda's not going. It's just me".

"But you'll be back in time for the baby right?" Jeza asked. The look on Chris' face told her all she needed to know. "Christina" she said angrily.

"I'm sorry, Jeza" she apologized, "I want to be here for you, you know that. But I just….I don't know if I'll be back in time to see the baby born".

"You promised you'd be there" she said in shaky voice. Tears started to well up in her eyes. "You said you'd be in the room me. You promised".

"I know" Chris said softly. She was getting a bit emotional herself.

"Tell them you can't do it" Jeza said, tears now spilling over and running down her face. "Tell them you can't go".

"I can't. I tried that, Jez" she explained. "I don't have a choice. If I don't go, I could get fired".

"This isn't fair" Jeza cried. Christina reached over and took her hand.

"I know it isn't. I would change it if I could. But you're gonna be okay" she assured her. "You have papa and Robbie and Javi and Sophia. You're gonna do great" she said squeezing her hand. "And I'm gonna be back as soon as I can. Ok?" Jeza sniffled and nodded her head. Chris pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head. Her father, surprisingly, didn't have much to say. She could only imagine what he was thinking inside his head. All in all, it'd gone a lot better than she'd expected. They enjoyed the rest of their time together before Christina went upstairs to her room with Amanda to pack some of her things. She wasn't taking much; just a few things she felt she didn't want to be without. Once her bag was packed she sat down on the bed to break some more news to Amanda.

"So Franco…."she said starting to explain his role in the operation, "he's, ummm, he's not gonna be my handler this time. There's another detective, Schiller…." she paused, "Franco and I will be checking in with him when we're not checking in with you guys".

"What?" Amanda asked. "Wait…." She paused for a minute processing what she'd just heard. "What do you mean "Franco and I"?"

"I mean Franco and I" she repeated, "will be checking in with _our_ handler, detective Schiller".

"You're going undercover together?" Christina nodded. "As a couple?" She nodded again. "And….exactly how serious does this relationship have to be?" Amanda asked nervously. If it had to be at all as serious as theirs was when they were undercover, she wouldn't be okay with it. Christina just shrugged her shoulders.

"I don't know" she said softly. "Believable at the very least".

"And at the most?"

"I don't know, Amanda". Chris knew this was going to be hard on them and their relationship. She hated Franco for doing this to her. She never thought things would go this way between them. "I know this sucks" she said softly. "But I have to do it".

"I know".

"And everything's gonna be okay".

"I know" Amanda said again. Christina turned to face Amanda and looker her in the eyes.

"And no matter what happens between me and Franco during this thing, it doesn't mean anything. I love you".

"I love you too". She kissed her softly on the lips then pulled her into a hug. She inhaled the scent of her hair and her clothes and enjoyed the feeling of her arms around her. They finally let go after a few minutes before standing up from the bed. Amanda grabbed Chris' bag for her and they left the bedroom together and headed downstairs. Chris' family was downstairs waiting at the door to say goodbye to her. She gave them each a hug and a kiss. Her father gave her a sad smile and told her to take care of herself. She told him the same. She told Jeza to keep up with her medication and listen to her doctor and their father and that she'd call as soon as she could. She hoped that she wouldn't be gone as long as they were expecting and she'd get to be there for the birth of her first niece or nephew. She gave her another hug then made her way out of the door before she got too emotional. Amanda told them she'd keep them in the loop as much as possible before leaving the house. They stood on the front stoop until Chris and Amanda drove away then went back inside for the evening.

Amanda drove Chris to Brooklyn narcotics precinct and walked with her upstairs to the squad room. When they got there Olivia, Nick, Fin and Carisi were there waiting. She was surprised to see that they'd come to see her off. Franco, Detective Schiller and Captain Hawes, commander of Brooklyn narcotics was there and they were all ready to get the show on the road. Chris paid them no mind and walked straight over to her teammates without so much as an acknowledgement of their presence. They huddled together to have a quick conversation before she had to leave.

"So what's this about this Schiller guy being your handler?" Carisi asked in a whisper.

"Yeah, I thought Franco was gonna be your handler" Fin chimed in.

"Uh, no" Chris said softly, "Franco's gonna be under with me" she said filling them in.

"What?" Amaro asked surprised.

"Look, I don't have a lot of time so I need to say this quickly. Franco doesn't do undercover well. He's got a history of losing control and things getting out of hand and people get hurt…." She paused for a second remembering the last time she went undercover with Franco. "People get killed" she added. "So I'll call Schiller because I have to but I'm gonna call you guys too". They all listened attentively while she spoke, making sure they didn't miss a word.

"Hey Reyes" Captain Hawes said from behind her. She turned to look at him, "Let's get a move on" he said rushing her. She nodded and turned back to her teammates.

"I'll check in with you after I talk to Schiller so give me thirty minutes max, ok?" she said increasing her pace of speech. They all nodded their understanding. "If I'm late, even one minute late…."

"I already told you" Fin said interrupting her, "we'll be barking up Schiller's tree".

"Don't worry about anything" Nick said, "we've got your back. You've got this". She took a deep breath and let it out and nodded her head.

"Ok" she said softly. She took her bag from Amanda and started to walk away. She suddenly turned back and pulled Amanda into one last hug. "I'm gonna be okay" she said trying to convince herself more than Amanda.

"Yeah" Amanda said with a nod.

"You'll check in on Jeza for me?" she asked. Amanda nodded again. "And if I miss the baby, you have to be there for her, ok? And take lots of video and pictures so I don't miss anything".

"I will".

"I'm gonna be okay" she said again. Amanda just nodded her head. "I love you".

"I love you too". She gave her a kiss and reluctantly walked away. Franco tried to grab her arm as she walked past him but she angrily shrugged him off and kept walking out of the squad room. He stood there for a moment longer before following Chris out of the squad room. Captain Hawes walked over and stood in front of them.

"Sergeant Benson, we'll keep you as updated as possible on the weeks that aren't your check in" he said.

"I appreciate that" she said keeping in mind everything Chris had said before she left. He nodded his head then went to his office while Detective Schiller returned to his desk. "Come on" Olivia said looking at her squad, "let's get outta here". They all walked out the Brooklyn Narcotics squad room together.

Franco and Chris were in the car driving to the apartment they'd be staying in while they were undercover. Franco was driving and Chris was silently staring out the window. Franco took glances at her out of the corner of his eye. He couldn't believe how far their relationship had fallen. They used to be best friends and now they didn't have two words to say to each other. Actually, it was Chris who didn't have two words to say to Franco. Franco, on the other hand, had a lot to say to her.

"You know you're gonna have to talk to me sooner or later" he said finally breaking the silence between them.

"Later is fine with me" she said continuing to stare out of the window.

"Look Chris I'm sorry for what I said at the bar" he said finally apologizing.

"I'm not. I meant everything I said" she said finally looking over at him. "You needed to hear it". He sucked his teeth and nodded his head.

"That's really how you feel?" he asked.

"Yeah, it is" she said without remorse. "Back in San Bern you thought you could control my life, not to mention my career. You still think that. I know you put my name in for this" she said angrily. "If you thought this was going to make me want to come over to work with you in narcotics, you can think again. You've killed any chance you ever had of having me as a partner again".

"I did put your name in" he said confirming what she already knew. "But not to convince you to come back and work with me. I just know that you're the one that can close this case".

"How about asking me, Franco? Did you think of that?" she asked slightly yelling.

"I knew you'd say no" he answered.

"So you just took my choice away? You get me a job replacing an undercover that you couldn't keep track of".

"Why do you think I'm doing this with you?" he yelled. "I'm going under so I can find her; get her out. I'm trying to bring her home".

"Maybe you should have been more attentive before" she said critically. "Old habits die hard, I guess".

"Don't start that shit" he said rolling his eyes. He finally pulled over in front of an apartment building. It didn't look like much to Chris from the outside but it'd have to be enough. "What happened back in San Bern, that wasn't my fault. Sandy made her own decisions during that op. Rico too".

"Whatever Franco. It doesn't matter anymore" she said with a shrug. "I just know that this time things are gonna be different. You _are not_ in charge and no matter what you might think I feel or what you actually feel, _this_ is a job. When it's done, we're done. Period". She reached back and grabbed her bag from the backseat before getting out of the car, slamming the door behind her. She walked up the fronts stairs and waited for Franco since he had the keys. He turned off the car but remained in his seat, sulking over Chris' words. He hit the steering wheel in frustration before getting out and locking up the car then heading up to the building with Chris. He opened the door for her and they went inside and up to their apartment to start in their new undercover identities.


	40. Chapter 40: Not Quite Right

**AN: Hey y'all. It's been forever, I know. It's been a busy semester for me. But I'm back. Hopefully, I'll be able to update more frequently but don't hold me to it. As always, leave your comments/suggestions. I love knowing what y'all think. Until next time. Enjoy!**

Chapter 40: Not Quite Right

The inside of the apartment building, like the outside, didn't look like much. It was a low rent place that probably wasn't on the up and up. Not anywhere that Chris would stay if she'd had to choose but perfect for fitting in with the crowd they'd be getting in with. The apartment was small. Only one bedroom, one and half bath with a small kitchen and living room. Chris went right to the bedroom and shut the door. Franco sat down on the couch and laughed softly to himself. What the hell had he gotten himself into? He knew that Chris would be able to help him with this case. She was the one that'd be able to help find his missing detective, bring her home, and take down this drug operation. But he was kicking himself for how he'd gone about it. Maybe he should've just asked Christina for her help. She's a good person. She wouldn't have left him hanging. And if she wouldn't have done it for him, she would've for a fellow officer missing in the line duty. He should've believed that about her. But he hadn't. Now she wasn't even talking to him and he knew she meant what she'd said downstairs in the car. Once they were done with this case, she'd be done with him for good. Somehow he'd have to live with that but for now he needed to focus on the task at hand. He had a detective out there somewhere that he needed to bring in safely. He'd do what he had to in order to make things right with Christina so they could get this job done. He got up from the couch and went over to the bedroom. He reached for the door knob and tried to turn it only to find it was locked. He knocked and waited for an answer. After a couple minutes with no response, he knocked again. Still nothing.

"Come on, Christina" he yelled through the door, "let me in. We gotta talk about this?" Chris ignored him and went on getting changed for bed. "Seriously Christina" he said in frustration, "let's be grownups about this". The door finally opened and Chris stood in front of him in shorts and a t shirt with her hair in messy bun on top of her head. He couldn't help staring for a bit longer than he should have. She still said nothing though. Just went over and climbed in bed, got under the covers and laid down to go to sleep. "We're seriously not gonna talk about this?" he asked sitting on the bed.

"What is there to talk about Franco?" Chris asked annoyed with his pestering. "We're here. We have a job to do. Let's just get it done so we can both go home".

"Look I'm sorry, ok?" he said finally apologizing. "You were right. I should've just asked you for your help".

"Yeah, you should've" Chris said. She kept laying down, not even bothering to look at him.

"But hey, it's a good cause" he said. Chris scoffed.

"God, you are really terrible at apologizing" she said rolling her eyes. "And you know what? Neither one of us would even have to be here if you did your job".

"Here we go…."

"No, really Franco" she said, finally sitting up to face him, "Let's be honest here. You had one job; to keep track of your asset. So what happened?"

"She didn't call in" he said nonchalantly.

"And you waited three months to ask for help?" she said raising her voice. "Why?"

"Come on Christina, you know the game. You don't go in when an asset misses one check in. It happens sometimes".

"But she didn't just miss one check in, Franco. You have a system, right?" He nodded. "It's there for a reason, right?" He nodded again. She worked with Franco enough to know his system like the back of her hand. Depending on the time between check ins, he gave cushion for his assets in case they couldn't make it at the appointed time. For an operation like this one, where check in was only once a month, he gave a cushion a couple days. For an every two weeks check in, he gave a cushion of about a week and so on. The further under they had to go on a case the longer they'd go between check ins. Those were the riskiest cases which is why there wasn't much cushion for missing a check in. Now that there was already a detective missing they're check ins had been made more frequent and they had no cushion for missing one. "So why didn't you use it?"

"Because I screwed up Chris. Alright!" he yelled. "Is that what you wanna hear? I screwed up!" He sighed and put his head in his hands. He collected himself before speaking again. "I made a mistake. I thou….I thought she was ready. I thought she could do this. I was wrong".

"You tried to make her into me" Chris said shaking her head.

"I thought she could handle it" he said still trying to rationalize his decision. "She reminded me so much of you. She was green but she was always on it, you know. She's smart, quick on her feet, a real go getter. Just like you".

"But she's not me, Franco" she argued. "Why are you trying to replace me? Why can't you just let me go? Move on". He sighed again.

"You're good. You're too good to just let you walk away" he answered.

"I haven't walked away. I'm just doing something else now".

"Yeah" he said softly.

"What's her name?" During this conversation, she'd realized they'd never told her the name of the missing detective and she hadn't asked.

"Elena. Elena Moreno" he answered. "She's a good kid….like you were".

"So, what, you're saying I'm not a good kid anymore" she asked a little offended by his use of the past tense. He laughed softly. "I wanna help Franco. I want to help you find her. I wouldn't have said no to that".

"I know" he said softly. "I didn't think it through. I'm sorry. I mean, you have your father and Jeza's baby is due soon. I shou….."

"It doesn't matter now" Chris said interrupting him. "We're here now. So let's get this done". He nodded his head. She turned over and laid back down to go to sleep. Franco, who was already moved into the apartment, got up and went over to the dresser to get a change of clothes. He went in the bathroom, showered and then joined Chris in bed. He tried to cuddle with her multiple times during the night but she kept pushing him away. He tried to play it off like it was an accident but she knew he was doing it on purpose. She finally got out of bed at six thirty in the morning to go out for a run. Franco woke up and told her she couldn't go out.

"Why not?"

"Because Christina Reyes goes for morning runs" he said turning over, "Christina Rivera doesn't. Come back to bed" he said yawning. Chris groaned and sat down on the edge of the bed. It was her first morning under as her new identity and she was already over it. "Since when do you run anyways?" he asked sleepily. "You hate running".

"Yeah, that was before".

"Before what?"

"Before Amanda" she said simply. She got up from the bed and started to leave the bedroom.

"Hey, hey, hey" he said quickly sitting up. She stopped and turned to look at him. "Where you going?"

"Why?" she asked annoyed.

"Why?" he echoed. "Because I'm responsible for you that's why".

"I'm going out Franco" she answered.

"Out where?"

"I don't know" she said with a shrug. "Out. I'm not gonna sit around this crap apartment all day".

"It's not even seven yet" he said looking over at the clock.

"So". Franco groaned and rubbed his face with his.

"Alright. Hold on. Let me get dressed".

"I don't need an escort".

"Come on" he said getting out of bed and heading for the bathroom, "we're in this together right?" He went in the bathroom and shut the door. Chris went to the living room to wait for him. He came out fifteen minutes later and they headed out of the apartment. They wandered around the neighborhood, drifting into the territory they'd have to infiltrate. They walked in lock step, sometimes hand in hand. They stood on a corner they knew was taken by the crew they wanted to get in with and waited. It took a while but finally they were approached by two men who wanted them to know they were on their turf. They were obviously more interested in Chris than Franco. She worked her magic and they invited them to a club later that night. They accepted the invitation and went on their way. "I knew I was right to request you" Franco said as they walked together.

"Don't gloat. It's unbecoming" Chris said looking over at him. "Anyways, we're not in yet. Still a ways to go".

"Nah. We're in" Franco said confidently. "Tonight will seal the deal". It was still early so they went out for breakfast. They talked about how they would play it at the club. They agreed that Chris would take the lead. In crews like this, they were always interested in the women. People were less suspecting of women being in the drug trade. Once they were part of the crew, they'd work their way to the big boss. In the meantime, they'd discretely ask about Elena.

After breakfast, they went shopping so Chris could buy some clothes to better fit in with the crowd they'd be running with. They hit mostly thrift stores to stay within the budget the department had given them. Once they'd hit their limit, they returned to their apartment. They spent the rest of the day going through case files on intel they already had on the drug ring. There was a picture of Elena in the file giving Chris her first visual of the missing detective. She was young and beautiful, just Franco's type. She wondered if there was more to why Franco had chosen her as his asset than he was telling. Franco went through everything, introducing Chris to all the players that Elena had given him info on before she went missing. He started from the bottom and worked his way up. She'd managed to get some good intel before she stopped checking in. Chris was impressed. Once she felt up to speed, they started getting ready for their night out. From what Monte and Ernesto, they guys they'd met earlier, had said it wasn't an upscale club. Still, people came dressed up. So Chris wore a simple dress with flats and Franco wore slacks and a button down shirt. They left the apartment at eight thirty and took a taxi to the club. When they got there, they went to the front of the line.

"Hey, man, what's up?" Franco said to the bouncer. He got a nod in return. "Monte y Ernesto nos invitaron". He looked to another bouncer behind him who went inside the club. He came back a few minutes later with Monte who gave the okay for them to come in. There was latin music playing, people dancing and plenty of alcohol flowing. Monte escorted Chris and Franco to a back room where there was a private party going on. There was a game of cards going, a pool table, and a small private bar in the corner. There was a couple dancing to the music that filtered in from the main club area. Monet introduced them to everyone and invited them to join in the game. Franco sat down at the card table and they dealt him in the next hand. Chris opted to play a game of pool instead. She bantered back and forth with her new friends, trying to find out where exactly she'd fit in. Franco, on the other hand, fit in perfectly. Almost too perfectly. It was like he'd known them for a long time. She went on with her pool game and kept an eye on her company.

They'd been at the club for nearly two hours when the drugs came out. Both Chris and Franco were offered but declined to participate. They stuck to beers and watched as everyone around them did illicit drugs. Christina got a contact high from Ernesto who kept blowing smoke from his marijuana in her face. Franco kept a close eye on him. He could see him taking an interest in her that had more to do with him wanting her to join his crew.

"Oye" he said interrupting their pool game. He stood beside Chris and wrapped is arm possessively around her waist. "Paso atrás" he said giving him a small push (Step back). "Ella está conmigo" (She's with me). Something about the way that Franco was interacting with Ernesto, and everyone else in the room, felt off. He was a bit too comfortable challenging Ernesto in front of everyone for her liking. And to her surprise, he backed off without a fight. They stayed at the club until closing and after, back in the private room where the money was being counted and drugs were being bagged for distribution. Neither Chris nor Franco were allowed to participate. She guessed they weren't trusted enough yet. But the fact that they were allowed to stay was a good enough start. They finally left the club just after three in the morning and headed home. Chris was going over the night's events in her head, cataloging everyone she'd met and analyzing everything conversation she could remember. She'd learned early on to trust her gut and something was telling her that things weren't quite right. She kept her thoughts to herself though and got ready for bed. Later that morning she went out while Franco was still asleep. She walked a ways to a pay phone and made a call that she wasn't due to make for a couple of weeks.

"Rollins" she heard through the receiver. She breathed a sigh of relief when she heard her voice on the phone.

"Hey" she said back, "it's me".

"Christina?" Amanda asked. It wasn't that she didn't recognize her voice. She'd recognized it immediately. That was the problem. It'd only been one full day since Chris had left to assume her new identity and she was calling in way ahead of schedule. Having said her name out loud, Amanda had gotten Fin, Nick and Carisi's attention. They all looked over with the same confusion that she had.

"Yeah, babe. It's me" she said confirming that it was her. Amanda got up from her desk and headed for the Sergeant's office, gesturing for them to follow her. She put Chris on speaker phone as she walked in Olivia's office. Nick, the last to enter, shut the door behind him. "Amanda?" Chris said making sure she was still there.

"Yeah, I'm here" she assured. "We're all here".

"Reyes, what's going on?" Benson asked worriedly. "You're not supposed to check in for another couple weeks".

"I know" she said quickly. "I know that but ummm….something's not right".

"What do you mean?" Fin asked.

"It's just…this is too easy" she answered. "We went out yesterday, walked the neighborhood, and we met these two guys. They invited us to a club and we went and….I don't know. Something's just off. They accepted us way too easily".

"Wait, you're already in?" Amaro asked surprised.

"Yeah" she answered. "Pretty much. I mean, I'm not making any runs or anything. I haven't met the boss but….they invited us back to their private room. They counted money in front of us, cut and bagged product. Everything. And…." she paused not knowing if she should say what she was thinking.

"And what…." Carisi asked encouraging her to continue.

"Franco….he just seemed way too comfortable. It was like he already knows them or something".

"Reyes, where are you?" Benson asked.

"I'm at a pay phone a good ways away from the territory. I had to sneak out while Franco was still asleep".

"Sneak out?" Fin asked confused, "What's that about?"

"Franco doesn't want me going out alone. He made a big deal about it yesterday" she explained.

"Well, he did already lose an agent" Olivia pointed out, "Maybe he's just being overly cautious".

"Yeah maybe" she said softly.

"You're onto something already. What are you thinking?" Amaro asked knowing that it had to be important for her to risk calling in so soon. She sighed heavily into the phone.

"I…" she hesitated to share her suspicions out loud. "I think I have to trust my gut and my gut is telling me that something isn't right" she said deciding to not to exactly what she was thinking. The conversation was making all of them nervous but none more than Amanda.

"What are you gonna do?" she asked trying to hide the worry in her voice.

"I'm gonna keep a low profile and keep working it. They like me already. Especially this one guy, Ernesto. I think he's gonna be my way in" she said further filling them in. Her phone started to vibrate in her pocket. She pulled it out and saw it was Franco calling. "I have to go".

"Wait" Amanda said quickly, "when will you call again?"

"I don't know" she said honestly.

"Well definitely in two weeks right? For your first official check in?" Carisi said. There was a moment of silence on the other end of the phone that didn't sit well with them.

"Yeah" she said clearly unsure of herself. "In two weeks". Her phone started to ring again. "I really have to go". Amanda took her off speaker phone and walked to the corner.

"Hey, be careful, ok?" she said quietly.

"Yeah, I will" Chris said. "I love you".

"I love you too" she said softly. She heard the line click and Chris was gone. She hung up the phone and rejoined the team.

"I don't like it" Fin said as soon as Amanda had rejoined them. "She's barely been under a whole day and she's already calling in?"

"I don't like it either" Nick said in agreement. "Chris knows what she's doing. She's not new to undercover work. She wouldn't break protocol and call in so early unless she felt threatened. She's prepping for something?

"What do you mean prepping for something?" Carisi asked confused. He'd never done undercover work in narcotics.

"It means she thinks things are gonna go bad and she wants us to know it" Fin said without missing a beat. Amanda stood uncomfortably listening to the conversation.

"Well shouldn't we do something?" Carisi asked.

"Do what?" Olivia asked jumping in. "She's not even supposed to be calling us. Her check in with us isn't for another four weeks. Her first check in is with Schiller".

"Who here thinks he'll keep us in the loop like he said he would?" Amanda asked looking around.

"Well, if he doesn't contact us then I'll call him" Olivia assured her. "And she said she'd call us after talking with him anyway".

"Yeah. And what if she can't?" she asked with some anger in her tone.

"Ay, it's like Nick said" Carisi said looking over at Amanda, "she knows what she's doing. She'll get a message to us".

"And until then, this conversation doesn't leave this room" Olivia said sternly to all of them. They all nodded their understanding and were about to leave her office to go back to work when Amanda's phone started to ring again. It was the same number that Chris had called from a few minutes ago. She answered and immediately put it on speaker.

"Hello" she said casually.

"It's me again" Chris answered.

"What's going on?"

"If I don't call you back by two o'clock on Friday, this is blown. You go to Hawes and Schiller, tell them to come in for us".

"Christina, what's going on?" Amanda asked worriedly.

"I don't have time to explain everything" she said. She was talking quickly letting them know that she in a rush. "I just know that things aren't right here".

"What's not right?" Nick asked quickly. "Tell us what's going on".

"One of the guys in the crew just called me. He wants to me to come back to the club on Thursday night" she said talking quickly.

"So he wants to use you guys for something. That's good right?" Carisi asked.

"Not us. Me" she clarified. "He wants me to come alone. I don't know what this is. Just be waiting for my call. Two o'clock on Friday, ok?"

"You got it. We'll be waiting" Fin said without hesitation.

"Ok. I have to go" she said quickly.

"Chris, wa…." Amanda started to try to keep her on the line but before she'd finished her statement, Chris had hung up the phone. "Dammit" she said angrily.

"I told you" Carisi asked much to everyone's confusion. "She got us a message. Now we wait".

"Oh great, Carisi. Thanks" Rollins said sarcastically.

"I'm just saying, she…."

"Ok" Olivia said stopping him from continuing. The last thing they needed right now was an argument. "We need to stay calm. Keep our heads". She included everyone but she was mainly talking to Rollins, who was visibly unraveling. "We do our jobs like we always do. Friday at one fifty we'll meet in here and wait for Reyes to call in. Ok?" They all nodded their heads. "Ok. Get back to work". They filed out of her office one by one, "Rollins, stay a minute?" she asked even though it wasn't a request. Amanda hung back and shut the door behind her teammates. "You gonna be able to keep it together?" she asked. Amanda nodded her head.

"Yeah" she said with a shrug.

"You sure about that?"

"Positive" she said without any hesitation.

"Because if it's gonna be a problem, you can sit out of the check in".

"There's no problem" she assured her.

"And you do know that if we have to go in for Chris and Franco that you'll have to stay behind, right?" Olivia asked to make sure they were on the same page.

"What? Why?" Amanda asked angrily.

"You're too emotionally involved Amanda".

"Damn right, I am. That's my girlfriend".

"Yeah. And that's why you have to stay behind" Olivia said getting up from her desk. She walked around and stood in front of her. "You know how this works, Rollins. You can't be involved in cases together".

"We're not involved in this case together" she argued. "She's undercover".

"And we're her handlers" she reminded her. "Now, it makes sense that she calls you when she checks in. I won't say anything about that. But if we have to go in to get her out, that's a part of our role in the investigation and that…..you can't be a party to". Amanda shifted uncomfortably in front of her boss. "I know this isn't easy" Olivia continued, "but this is how it has to be. Got it?" Rollins knew there was no point in arguing.

"Got it" she said in defeat.

"So, you sure you're good?" she asked one last time for assurance. Amanda nodded.

"Yep. All good Sergeant". She stood there for moment longer then walked out of the office. Olivia returned to her desk and got back to work. Amanda rejoined her colleagues in the squad room. She was obviously restless, tapping her pen on her desk and bouncing her leg up and down. After a few minutes, Fin finally spoke up.

"You know she's gonna be alright" he said quietly.

"I don't know Fin" she said in hushed tone. "You said yourself she's barely been under for a whole day and she's already calling in".

"Yeah but I also said that Chris is no rookie. She knows what she's doing".

"She said Franco's gotten people killed Fin" she reminded him. "I just….I can't stop thinking about that".

"She's gonna be alright" he said confidently. Amanda shook her head. She didn't have the kind of confidence that Fin had at the moment. "Hey" he said getting her to look at him, "she's gonna be alright" he repeated. Amanda took a deep breath and nodded her head. Nothing Fin could say would keep her from worrying until she heard from Chris again. All she could do now was wait.


	41. Chapter 41: Alone

Chapter 41: Alone

Franco was at the apartment, restlessly waiting for Chris to come back. She hadn't answered the numerous phone calls he'd made to her cell. He had no idea where she could have gone. He didn't have the time nor the patience to deal with her and her need to break the rules and do her own thing during this op. He knew that she didn't want him to be "in charge" but this wasn't acceptable. He was already dealing with losing contact with one asset and now she was MIA. When she finally walked in the door, he was seething.

"Dónde demonios has estado?" he asked angrily (Where the hell have you been?). She held up the bag and tray in her hand.

"I got coffee and bagels" she said nonchalantly. "What's your problem?"

"I called you four times" he yelled.

"Sorry" she said with a shrug.

"¿por qué haces esto a mí?" (Why do you do this to me?)

"qué?" she asked confused (What?). She took down a plate from the cabinet, got a knife from the drawer and sat down at the kitchen table.

"volverme loco". (Drive me crazy)

"I went for a walk and got breakfast" she said taking a bagel from the bag and sitting it on the plate. "What's the big deal?"

"I'm supposed to be looking out for you" he said still raising his voice. "How can I do that if you don't answer my phone calls?"

"Well, I'm here now" she said taking a bite of her bagel. "You want a bagel?" she asked, her question slightly muffled by the food in her mouth. Franco put his hands on his hips and shook his head.

"You need to take this seriously Christina".

"I am" she said simply. She continued eating her bagel, unbothered by Franco's sour mood. He walked over and joined her at the table.

"What are you doing?" he asked, putting his arms on the table and interlocking his fingers.

"I'm having breakfast".

"You know what I'm talking about" he said angrily. "You can't be going out all….half cocked".

"I got breakfast Franco" she said annoyed. "Nobody's gonna kill me for buying bagels and coffee".

"You don't leave this apartment without telling me where you're going" he said firmly. "Entiendes?"

"Nah" she said shaking her head, "it's not working like that. Not this time. I don't answer to you. I answer to Schiller in two weeks and Benson two weeks after that" she said finishing the last of her bagel. "You wanted my help. I'm helping. But I'm not taking orders from you".

"So what, you're gonna do this whole op on your own? I know you talked to Monte earlier" Chris took a sip of her coffee and eyed Franco over the rim of her cup. "He called me; said he already talked to you about meeting up".

"Yeah so?"

"Were you gonna tell me?"

"Nope" she said honestly. The feeling in her gut wasn't going away and she wanted find out sooner rather than later if she was right or not. She was diving in head first and she hoped to find out what happened to Elena in the process. If her feeling about Franco was right, he wouldn't be much help to her.

"So you are? You're just gonna do this on your own, huh?"

"Is that a problem?"

"Yeah, it is" he said simply. "Qué estás pensando? These are the same people that Elena was working with". (What are you thinking?)

"I'm well aware of that".

"Then why would put yourself in a position to end up just like her?" he asked confused.

"How'd she end up?" she asked, noticing his choice of words. "I thought that's why you wanted me here; to help you figure out what happened to her. How do you expect me to find her if I don't get into the same crew she was in?"

"I just don't want you doing this alone" he clarified.

"Well, Monte does; told me to come to the club tomorrow night" she said with a shrug. "Alone" she added. "This isn't your op anymore. It's mine". She got up from the table and took her coffee with her to the bedroom, closing the door behind her. Franco sat at the kitchen table more upset now than he had been when he didn't know where Chris was. He slammed his fist down on the table in anger. He'd brought Chris in thinking he'd be able to keep some sort of control over her. Who was he kidding? Nobody controlled Christina. Now he had to figure out how to adjust his plans. While Franco sat at the kitchen table thinking, Chris did the same while lying in bed. She had a lot on her mind and there was only one person she wanted to talk to. She wanted to call Amanda again more than anything, but she couldn't. Her phone vibrated on the bedside table and she reached over and grabbed it. It was a text from Ernesto asking her to meet him later that day.

_There's someone I want you to meet_

_Give me a minute. I'll ask Franco. _

_No. No Franco. Ven solo (Come alone)_

She hesitated for a minute before replying, asking when and where. He replied seven that evening and sent her the address. She said she'd be there. It was starting to worry her that both Monte and Ernesto had contacted her about meeting them and neither wanted Franco to come. After a few more minutes of lying there, she got up and went to get the case files that had everything they knew so far. She studied them again to prepare herself for tonight's meeting. Franco was still upset that she wasn't including him what she was doing. They argued about her doing this on her own but she eventually started ignoring him. He finally gave up trying to talk to her. At six o'clock she went in the bathroom, showered and then got ready to meet Ernesto. By six forty she was walking out the door. Franco asked where she was going but she pretended that she hadn't heard him and left the apartment. She walked to the address Ernesto had given her and arrived right on time. She went up to the apartment and knocked on the door. A minute later, the door opened. Ernesto stuck his head out, looked down the hall both ways then ushered her inside. A guy she didn't recognize stepped forward and patted her down. She didn't offer any protest.

"Has venido solo?" (You came alone)

"Si. Eso es lo querías" she answered. (Yeah. That is what you wanted)

"Lo que le dijiste Franco a dónde te ibas?" (What did you tell Franco about where you were going?)

"Nada (Nothing)" she said simply.

"Nada" he repeated. "Verdad? (Really?)"

"Si. Nada" she said again. He didn't seem to believe her but he moved on without asking anymore questions.

"Ok. This is Manny. He's going to give you an assignment. I need it done tonight. Puede manejar eso? (Can you handle that?)"

"Si. No problemo (Yeah. No problem)" she said with a shrug. Ernesto turned to Manny and nodded his head towards the hallway.

"Vamos (Come on)" Manny said before turning and heading down the hallway. Chris hesitated for a moment before following behind him. He opened the door to a room at the end of the hall and she followed him inside. He shut the door behind them before going over to the closet. He opened the door and in the corner on the floor was a safe. He put in the combination and took out a black bag. He unzipped it, checked the contents and zipped it back up again. He walked over to the desk and grabbed a small piece of paper and handed it to her along with the bag. She looked at the paper and saw there was an address written on it. She looked back up at Manny thinking he had some instructions for her but he just stared back at her. "Se puede ir (You can go)" he said gesturing towards the door.

"Oh. Ok". She put the bag on her shoulder, the note in her pocket, opened the door and walked back out to the living room. Ernesto was sitting on the couch with a woman, another person Chris hadn't met before. They were doing drugs off the coffee table. She paid them little attention. Just headed for the door.

"Oye" Ernesto said getting her attention. She stopped just short of stepping out the door and looked over her shoulder at him. "Knock three times and ask for Alonzo. Diles que te envié" he said (Tell him I sent you). She nodded her head in understanding. "Don't fuck up" he said sternly.

"No haré" she said confidently (I won't). She stepped out into the hallway, shutting the door behind her. She stood there for a minute, taking a deep breath to calm her nerves, then headed out of the building to the address Manny had given her. It took her twenty minutes to get there, walking as fast as she could. She checked the paper one more time to make sure she was in the right place. She was. She walked up the stairs to the house and knocked three times like Ernesto had told her to. A moment later she heard a voice on the other side of the door, asking who it was. "Es Christina" she said back. She heard voices but she couldn't make out what they were saying. A moment later the door opened and a young Latino stood in front of her.

"Qué quieres?" he asked looking around to see if anyone was with her. (What do you want?)

"Estoy aquí para ver Alonzo. Ernesto, él me envió" she said looking him in the eyes (I'm here for Alonzo. Ernesto, he sent me). He noticed the bag on her shoulder and turned to an older, very handsome Latino standing behind him.

"Ella tiene una bolsa; uno de los nuestros" he said quietly. (She has a bag; one of ours). The man in the background nodded and the young Latino turned back to her. "Entra" (Come in). She stepped through the threshold and stood in the entryway. There was muffled music playing from upstairs. She glanced up the stairs but couldn't see anything. She turned her attention back the men standing with her. The man who'd made the call to let her in, gestured for her to go into the living room. She went over, taking the bag off her shoulder as she went, and took a seat on the couch. They walked in the living room behind her and stood there, looking her over.

"Alonzo" the older, handsome Latino said introducing himself. "Mi hermano, Juaquin. You have something for me?" She held the bag up to him and he took it from her then passed it to his brother. Juaquin took the bag over to the table and emptied out its contents. He checked through everything twice before looking to his brother.

"Todo está aquí" he said with a nod. (It's all here). Alonzo nodded before going over and sitting next to Chris on the couch. Juaquin repacked the bag and took it up the stairs. She heard the music from earlier get louder and then quiet again.

"So, how do you know Ermesto?" he asked.

"I just met him yesterday while I was out. He invited us to the club last night" she explained.

"Us?"

"Me and my boyfriend" she clarified.

"Boyfriend, huh?" She nodded. "Estoy decepcionado" (I'm disappointed). Chris gave a coy smile and light laugh. "So where's this boyfriend now?"

"Home" she said simply.

"Why didn't he tag along?"

"Ernesto asked me to come alone".

"And he let you?" he asked surprised.

"He doesn't _let me_ do anything" she said confidently. "He's my boyfriend. Not my father". He smiled and nodded his head.

"Me gustas" he said looking her seductively. (I like you).

"Si" she said arrogantly. She stood up from the couch and headed for the door. She'd opened the door and stepped out onto the porch when Alonzo called out for her to wait. He walked outside with her and shut the door behind them. He closed the space between them, taking glances back at the house as if he was worried someone was watching them.

"Este novio, es serio?" he asked (This boyfriend, it's serious). He was close enough to lean down and kiss her if he wanted to. Chris wondered if this was how things had happened with Elena. There was only one way to find out.

"Depende" she said with a shrug (Depends). She stood there for a moment longer then walked down the stairs and headed down the street. She was sure that he'd calling her soon. All she could do now was wait. She walked all the way back to the apartment, getting hit on from close up and cat called from far away. When she walked into the apartment, Franco was sitting on the couch. There were three empty beer bottles on the coffee table and a fourth in his hand. She looked at him but didn't stop to speak. She just continued into the bedroom. She took off her shoes then her jacket and shirt and was standing there in just her jeans and bra when he walked into the bedroom.

"The hell have you been?" he asked. She ignored him and continued to get undressed. "Where the hell have you been!?" he yelled. She looked at him standing there in jeans with no shirt on, beer still in his hand.

"I went out" she said simply. "To meet Ernesto" she added.

"Alone?"

"He didn't want you to come" she said putting a t shirt on. She climbed into bed and got under the covers. "You, you're making this hard. It doesn't have to be. Nothing's personal, Franco. This is the job. Let it be a job". She laid down and got comfortable, then closed her eyes to go to sleep. Franco left the bedroom and went back to the living room to continue drinking. It'd been about twenty minutes and Chris hadn't fallen asleep yet. She turned over and propped herself up on her elbows when she heard him arguing with someone, she assumed on the phone. He was slurring his words and she couldn't hear everything he was saying but she got bits and pieces. First she heard, "we agreed to take things slow" followed by "you're already getting too carried away with her" then mumbling and more slurring. Finally, she heard him say, "if you want to use her for something else, run it by me first". She guessed he had to be talking to either Ernesto or Monte. They were the only two who'd asked her to do anything so far. She laid back down and turned over to stare at the wall. A minute later, Franco came in the room and climbed in bed next to her. She kept replaying the things she'd heard Franco say over and over in her head. The feeling in her gut, the one that said something wasn't right, was stronger than ever now.


	42. Chapter 42: Franco's Girl

The next morning when Chris woke up, Franco was already gone from the apartment. She knew something had to be up because it was eight thirty. Franco wouldn't get up that early for no reason. But she didn't call him or try to figure out where he'd gone. How could she? What right did she have to manage his comings and goings if she'd told him not to worry about hers? So she tried not to think about it. She grabbed a bag of potato chips from the kitchen and sat on the couch to channel surf. An hour and a half later, she'd eaten the entire bag of chips and still hadn't settled on anything she wanted to watch. She was about to go take a nap when she got a text from an unknown number.

¿Estás ocupado? (You busy?)

¿Quién es este? (Who is this?)

Tu futuro esposo (Your future husband)

?

Es Alonzo hermosa. ¿Ocupado? (It's Alonzo beautiful. Busy?)

No.

Recibirme al de Alicia's en el mediodía (Meet me at Alicia's at noon)

¿Por qué? (Why?)

No podemos casaríamos si no lo hacemos fecha (We can't get married if we don't date)

Christina laughed to herself. Alonzo was a handsome guy but of course she wasn't interested in dating him. But, as usual, she had to play along as if she were interested. She texted him back saying she'd see him at noon then went in the bathroom to shower. While she was in the shower, she thought about her family and how they were doing. She hoped Jeza was doing okay and that her father and Robbie were taking good care of her. She thought about Amanda and Frannie. She thought about how things were going back in the squad room. Then she turned her thoughts to Franco and the job she was there to do; Ernesto and Monte and how they were connected to Elena's disappearance. Finally, her date with Alonzo, the handsome, smooth talking Latino who didn't care at all that she already had a boyfriend. She thought about playing it sweet and coy versus feisty and confident. She decided it'd be best to play it by ear. She finally got out of the shower and went out to the bedroom to get ready. She was sitting on the bed wrapped in a towel, texting Monte, when she heard the front door open and close. A moment later, Franco walked into the bedroom.

"Where you off to now?" he asked. "You even gonna tell me?"

"I have a date" she said continuing to look do at her phone.

"With who?" he asked forcefully, his tone full of jealousy.

"Doesn't matter" she said putting her phone down. She got up from the bed and walked over to the dresser to pick out something to wear.

"It does matter" he argued. "I'm supposed to be your boyfriend. You going out on dates around here is gonna make me look like a fool". Chris ignored him and took her clothes with her into the bathroom, shut and locked the door. Franco walked over to the bathroom door and kept talking. "Is it with Ernesto or Monte?" he asked as if it could only be one of them. "Tell me Christina". He heard nothing from inside the bathroom. He went over, sat down on the bed and waited impatiently for her to come out of the bathroom. She came out ten minutes later, dressed in jeans, a tank top, and a nice jacket. She didn't acknowledge him at all. Just finished getting ready to go on her date. "You are being really _fucking_ childish" he snapped. She looked at him as she slipped her cell into her back pocket. Then, without saying a word, she left the room and headed out to meet Alonzo. As soon as he heard the front door shut, he took out his phone and called Ernesto.

"¿Que dije?" he asked angrily (What did I say?). Ernesto didn't know what he meant. "I said if you want to use her for something, you ask me first".

"I'm not using her for anything today, Franco" he said nervously. "Juro hombre. Nada". ( I swear man. Nothing).

"Well where the hell is going, huh? Talking about she has a date". Even though he and Chris weren't really dating, he was taking the fact that she was going out to see someone very personally. He felt cheated on and more than that, she was making him look bad to the crew. "What the fuck is going on!?" he yelled.

"No sé" he said quickly (I don't know). "Ask Monte. He wanted her for something today, not me. Juro, Franco". (I swear, Franco)

"I find out your giving her jobs without asking me first, we're gonna have problems". He didn't wait for him to say anything back. He just hung up the phone. His next call was to Monte, asking the same questions. Where was Christina going and who was she with? He said he didn't know either. He'd told her to come to the club later that night to help with some of the girls. But he didn't have anything for her to do during the day. Franco hung up the phone, more pissed off now than he was before he'd made the phone calls. Christina was involved with someone else that neither he, Ernesto, nor Monte knew anything about. Meanwhile, Christina arrived at Alicia's to meet Alonzo. Alicia's was a pizzeria in the neighborhood. They got a booth and ordered a pie to share. Alonzo didn't waste any time getting the conversation started.

"So tell me about this boyfriend" he said leaning forward interestedly.

"What do you wanna know?"

"Who is he? How long you two been together? Do I have a shot?" he asked boldly. Chris laughed. It wasn't something they'd worked out beforehand, the length of their relationship so avoided giving a number.

"His name is Franco" she started explaining. She noticed a change in his body when she said Franco's name and wondered if he already knew him. "We've been together for a while. Do you have a shot?" She shrugged. "I don't know. You'd have to take that up with him". Alonzo laughed uncomfortably and leaned against the back of the booth.

"You're Christina?" he asked. "Franco Avila's Christina?"

"I guess my reputation precedes me" she said not giving away any indication of how pissed off she was. There was no way that Alonzo should know who Franco was.

"Yes. Yes it does" he said nodding his head. "Franco's been hyping you up a bit. Not to me but it's small circles so…..word gets around. I should've put two and two together".

"I guess you're not my future husband anymore, huh?" she said with a smirk. He laughed.

"Depende" he said using her words from the night before (Depends). "What did he say when you told him that you were coming here to meet me?"

"I didn't" she said simply.

"So he doesn't know you're here with me?" She shook her head no. "So you just do whatever you want to, huh?"

"Es correcto" she said confidently. (That's right).

"Well, that's one thing that'll have to change" he said leaning in again. His voice had changed from sweet and flirty to serious and authoritative.

"¿De Verdad?" (Really?)

"Si, verdad. No puedo tener gente pensando mi novia lleva los pantalones". The waiter came and sat their pizza on the table between them with two plates. "No puedo verse como un tonto. Entiendes, ¿no? " (Yeah, really. I can't have people thinking my girlfriend wears the pants. Can't look like a fool. You understand, right?). He'd just voiced the same worry that Franco had. Typical man thing; not wanting to look bad in front of his boys. She continued to play along.

"Si, entiendo" she said taking a slice of pizza and putting it on her plate then added grated cheese on top. "Pero mientras yo sigo siendo sólo un amigo….." Alonzo started to laugh before she finished her sentence. (Yeah, I understand. But while I'm still just a friend...)

"Need to get in all the sass you can?" he asked still laughing. He took his first bite of his slice of pizza.

"Well, might as well" she said with a shrug. She picked up her slice and took a bite. Alonzo finished the entirety of his side of the pizza. Chris packed the rest of her side to go. They sat and talked for a couple of hours. Alonzo did most of the talking, mainly about himself. He bragged on his reputation and his crew and how much respect he got in the neighborhood. It was his way of impressing her. She couldn't help but wonder why he thought talking about running a drug operation would accomplish that. Of course, he didn't say outright that he was the leader of a drug ring but he didn't have to. Christina got the gist. They finally left the pizzeria and Christina walked back to Alonzo's house with him. She went inside and saw his brother Juaquin again, met his sister Laila and their cousin Eduardo. She liked them a lot, especially Laila. She was a lot like what Chris expected Jeza would be like once she'd finished maturing. This was the harder part of the job; meeting good people who were doing the wrong things to get by.

Christina stayed at Alonzo's until early evening when she finally said she had to go. She made a joke about being in trouble with Franco for being out all day. Alonzo told her if he got out hand to give him a call. He was more than ready to take care of him and her. She left and made her way home to get changed for the club. Franco wasn't home and, to her surprise, he hadn't called her all day. Since her talk with Alonzo, she had more to go along with the feeling that'd be growing in her gut. She headed back out at seven thirty to meet Monte at the club. The bouncer let her in without question this time and she went straight to the back room.

When she walked in, Franco was already there playing a game of pool. Ernesto, Monte, and Manny were there along with some of the others she'd met the other night and some she hadn't. Franco walked over to her and kissed her softly on the lips before whispering in her ear to behave. She chuckled softly and strained not to roll her eyes, pretending that everything between them was just fine. There was a table in the corner where all the women were sitting. Monte told her to go over and join them, introduce herself. She did as he said and five minutes later he came over to her. He gave the keys to his suburban and a note with an address on it. He told her to drive them to the address and that she was in charge of the girls, getting them to the house and bringing them back. He looked at her and gave her the same instruction that Ernesto had the night before. Don't fuck up. She left out the back with the girls and drove them to the house. They were all patted down as they entered and then sent to the basement. There were multiple tables around, some with money other with drugs. Chris finally knew what they were there for. The girls, had obviously been there before because, without any orders, they stripped down to their underwear and got to work on either counting money or bagging the different products for distribution. Chris sat in the corner and read a magazine that was sitting on one of the tables. Then she got on her phone then read another magazine. She listened to the girls' conversation but didn't participate until she was invited.

"Así que usted es la chica de Franco?" she heard from across the room (So you're Franco's girl?). She looked up to see who'd said it but all eyes were on her. "Así, ¿verdad?" (So, are you?) This time she could see who was asking. It was Navia, the most talkative of the group from what she could tell so far.

"Si, yo soy" she answered. (Yeah, I am)

"Hum" she mumbled. She had a sly smirk and gave her a side eye. Chris could tell she was a gossip.

"¿Por qué?" she asked. (Why?)

"Nada" she said with a shrug, "Solo me preguntaba". (Nothing. Just wondering)

"¿Por qué?" she asked with more attitude this time. She knew she'd get a straight answer out of her, and the other girls too, if she was forceful. After all, they were the ones in their underwear counting money and cutting drugs and she was fully clothed reading magazines.

"I was with my boyfriend earlier, en el barrio" she said more seriously, "I saw you walking with Alonzo".

"And?"

"Yo sería cuidadoso si yo fuera usted" Yolanda said speaking up. Chris pegged her for the oldest of the group. Not because she looked older but she had an attitude that was more mature than all the others. (I would be careful if I were you)

"¿Qué demonios se supone que significa?" (What the hell is that supposed to mean?)

"You don't want to end up like Elena" Navia said simply. Finally Chris was hearing something about Elena. She should've known this was the place to get her intel; from other women. She'd probably never get close enough to the boys to find out anything. But in the trade, most always, women stuck together.

"Elena? Quien es Elena?" she asked pretending to oblivious.

"Franco's girl before you" Yolanda answered. "She started coming like seven months ago, doing the same job you're doing now. Ella era agradable. We liked her. Then she started hanging out with Alonzo. Few weeks later, she was gone". (She was nice)

"Ido?" she asked. They all nodded. "Ido a donde?" Yolanda shrugged. (Gone? Gone where?)

"Nadie lo sabe. She was here one night and gone the next. Ella simplemente desaparecido" Navia said looking over at her. (Nobody knows. She just disappeared)

"You watch your ass with that one, chica" Yolanda suggested.

"Franco or Alonzo?" she asked for clarification.

"Ambas" she said simply. (Both). The room was quiet for a minute as Chris let everything she'd just heard sink in. Something wasn't right. If Franco had something to do with Elena's disappearance, why would he bring her in to help find her? It didn't make sense. She took a deep breath and let it out quietly.

"Vuelve al trabajo" she said opening her magazine back to the page she'd left off. The women went back to counting and bagging. "Gracias" she said softly. She looked up over her magazine to see Yolanda give a small nod and Navia with a slight pleased smile on her face. She looked back down at her magazine and continued to read. They girls were done with their job by two in the morning and Chris drove them back to the club like she'd been told. Even though they'd been searched before leaving the house, they were searched again before leaving the club. Chris gave Monte back his keys and she and Franco headed out of the club together. Before they were out the door, Chris turned to Ernesto.

"Hey, what's up with that Alonzo guy?" she asked. Franco's head snapped towards Ernesto who was suddenly extremely nervous.

"Uh…I….nada" he stuttered. Chris looked at Franco who was clearly pissed off.

"O…k" she said conveying her confusion by their reactions. She stepped out the back door and headed out to the street. Franco stayed behind for a minute. When he came out to meet her, he was flexing his hand open and closed and his knuckles were torn. Chris' suspicions of Franco were only getting stronger. She didn't want to believe that he could be involved with whatever happened to Elena but everything she was learning was leading her further to that conclusion. They walked home, went upstairs to their apartment and got ready for bed, all in complete silence. They'd been laying down for a few minutes when Franco spoke.

"We got a job tomorrow so….we'll have to get up early" he said into the darkness.

"How early?"

"Not crack of dawn early like you do for your morning runs" he said with an attitude, "but early".

"Fine" she said simply. She had a lot on her mind. The conversation she'd had with Alonzo, the conversation she'd had with the girls, and now Ernesto and Franco's reactions to the mere mention of Alonzo's name. The pieces of the puzzle were coming together and she didn't like the picture they were creating. She'd told Amanda and the others that she'd call tomorrow by two o'clock. She didn't know how this job Franco had mentioned would affect that timing but she had to make that call. If she didn't then they'd be coming in after her and she knew that it was too soon for that. Now that she was in, she didn't want to get out until she had all the answers she wanted.


	43. Chapter 43: Sharing Suspicions

Chapter 43: Sharing Suspicions

Franco's alarm went off the next morning at nine. When he rolled over to wake Christina she was already gone from bed. He shook his head and reached for his phone. Just as he was about to grab it and call Christina, he heard the front door open and then shut again. Chris walked into the bedroom in a tank top and joggers, sweating and drinking from a bottle of water. She took of her damp top and threw it in the laundry basket. Now in just her joggers and a sports bra, she went over to the dresser to get some clothes to wear for the day.

"I thought we agreed you didn't do morning runs" Franco said looking at her.

"We didn't agree on anything". She took her clothes and headed into the bathroom to shower.

"What if you had been late?"

"Am I?" she asked stopping just inside the bathroom door.

"No, but…"

"Then what's the problem, Franco?"

"Nothing. Nevermind" he said tossing back the covers. Chris shut the bathroom door and undressed for her shower. When he heard the water turn on, Franco grabbed his phone and called Monte. "Yeah. Is everything ready?" He listened for a minute as Monte gave him a rundown of the plan. "Good. That's perfect" he said pleased. "Yeah, we're getting ready now. We'll be there by ten thirty. Bueno. Hasta luego" (Good. See you later). He hung up the phone then got up and went to the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee. He poured a bowl of cereal and opened the frig to get some milk. That's when he saw the box of Chris' left over pizza. He figured that's where she must've gone on her "date". He grabbed the milk poured some over his cereal and returned it to the frig. He took his bowl and went back to the bedroom just as Chris was coming out of the bathroom. "So you went to Alicia's yesterday?" he asked sitting on the bed eating his breakfast. "For your date?"

"Yep" she answered nonchalantly.

"With who?"

"A new friend".

"Who?"

"Why?" she asked turning to look at him. "Why do you wanna know?"

"You're making me look bad".

"How am I doing that exactly?" she asked folding her arms over her chest.

"The guys are asking me why you're going out with other guys. They're laughing at me; they think I'm a joke because I can't control my woman" he said angrily. "How do you expect me to get any respect in the crew? To move up the latter, get some status?"

"You seem to be doing just fine despite your….lack of control of your woman".

"What's that supposed to mean?" She shrugged her shoulders. He sighed and shook his head before getting up from the bed. He set his bowl down on the night stand and went into the bathroom. Chris rolled her eyes and headed to the kitchen. She made herself a cup of coffee from the pot that Franco had put on. When he came out of the bedroom fifteen minutes later, she was sitting on the couch on her phone. "Who you talking to?" he asked.

"None of your business, Franco?" she snapped. "Stop asking me questions". She got up from the couch and headed out of the apartment. She went downstairs and waited on the front steps for him to come down. Franco made himself a cup of coffee to take with him and headed out. They met up with Ernesto and Monte at Ernesto's apartment. From there, they drove to the house that Chris had gone to the night before to supervisor the girls. They loaded Monte's car with cash and drugs and then took it to the club. They unloaded all of the cash and some of the drugs and Monte locked it in the safe. From there, they drove to another house and unloaded the rest of the drugs. There, Christina met the rest of the crew. There was Adrian, Richie, Gabe, Rosita, and Marisol. She could see that Franco was already known to them. Even though it was Ernesto and Monte doing all the talking, they all looked to Franco. It was obvious the orders were really coming from him.

They got to work unloading each package and dividing them up between all of them. They double, triple and quadruple checked everything. They unpackaged, reweighed and repacked every bag to make sure they were all right. Franco watched as Chris continued to check her watch every five to minutes. He wondered where she had to be to keep checking the time. He went over to Monte and talked to him for a minute then Monte left the room. He came back a few minutes later with a package and went over to Christina. He gave her the package and another note with a new address and a name on it along with the keys to his truck. It was now twelve thirty. He said she had an hour to deliver the package and get back to the club. She gave Franco a look that he was all too familiar with before taking the note and the package and storming out the back door. Once she was gone, Franco started speaking more freely, taking a more active role in their preparations.

Chris pulled up to the address that Monte had given her. It'd taken her almost thirty minutes to get there. She walked up to the door, knocked and waited for an answer. A pregnant girl answered the door. She asked for the person whose name was on the note and said that Franco sent her. She said Franco's name on purpose, just testing her theory that it was really Franco, and not Monte or Ernesto, who was in charge. The girl didn't hesitate to let her in the door. She went inside to the back room where she got a contact high as soon as she walked through the door. She exchanged the package for a different package. She looked inside and saw cash. She fingered through the bills and guessed it was five thousand dollars, at the very least.

"Usted no confía en mí" he asked as she quickly counted the money. (You don't trust me?)

"Nada personal" she said closing the bag, "Es genial hacer negocios contigo". (Nothing personal. Nice doing business with you). She turned to leave when he called after her.

"Te llamas?" he asked. She stopped and turned back to look at him.

"Christina" she answered.

"Ah. Eres la chica de Franco". She nodded her head. "No estaba mintiendo" he said leaning over and nudging his friend with his elbow. His friend agreed. "Franco talks about you…..a lot" he added. (You're Franco's girl. He wasn't lying).

"Así que he oído" she said arrogantly. (So I've heard)

"Dar a Franco mis saludos. Dile que me debe una cerveza" (Give Franco my regards. Tell him he owes me a beer). Chris smiled and nodded then headed out of the house and back to the club, speeding all the way there. She got back to the club at one thirty five. She took the package inside and tossed it into Franco's lap before tossing Monte back his keys.

"Dante dijo que le debes una cerveza" she said standing in front of him (Dante said you owe him a beer). He picked up the package she'd just thrown at him and tossed it to Ernesto. He caught it and took it over to the safe, locking it in with all the cash that'd been put in earlier. "Are we done?" she asked looking at Franco. He looked up at her for a minute before looking to Monte.

"¿Somos?" (Are we?).

"Si" he said with a nod. Franco turned back to her.

"Si" he repeated. Christina scoffed and rolled her eyes before leaving out the back door again, slamming it on her way out. She walked a couple blocks away and got in a taxi. She had fifteen minutes to get to a pay phone and make the call in to her squad. She saw a pay phone that she thought was far enough away and told the cab driver to pull over. She gave him a twenty and asked him to wait before quickly getting out of the car and going over to the pay phone. There was someone already using it so she had to wait. She checked her watch and saw that she had only six minutes left before she'd be late. She waited impatiently for the man in front of her to finish his call. Meanwhile, the SVU squad was gathered in Sergeant Benson's office waiting for her call. It was three minutes until the deadline she'd given them and they were all on pins and needles.

"We should call Captain Hawes now" Amanda said breaking the silence. Olivia looked at her watch.

"She still has a couple minutes, Rollins" she said not wanting to rush.

"We really think two minutes is gonna make a difference?" Carisi asked. Olivia looked to Fin and he gave her a nod. She picked up her phone and started to dial Hawes' number. Just as she hit send, Amanda's phone started to ring. She quickly hung up the phone and Amanda answered hers.

"Hello" she said putting the caller on speaker.

"Hey, it's me" Chris said into the phone. They all breathed a sigh of relief.

"You cutting it pretty close there" Nick said, "had us worried".

"Yeah, the Sarg was just about to make the call".

"Well, don't" she said firmly. "I'm fine".

"So what's going on" Fin asked, "What took you so long to call?"

"I had a….we" she corrected herself, "had a job today".

"We" Amanda repeated. "So Franco went with you this time".

"Oh, he did more than go with me" she said.

"What do you mean?" Amaro asked confused by her statement.

"I think….I think Franco's dirty….." she said voicing her concerns out loud for the first time, "and I think he might've had something to do with what happened to Elena" she continued.

"You think?" he asked. "Or you know?" She thought carefully before answer.

"I know" she answered, "I know he's dirty and I know that's why Elena is gone. I don't know how much he had to do with it but he plays a part in it".

"Does he know that you know?" Fin asked.

"Yeah, he knows" she answered without hesitating.

"Alright it's time for you get outta there" Fin said quickly.

"No" Chris argued.

"Christina" Amanda said but Chris didn't give her a chance to say anything.

"I'm not coming in" she said firmly. "Not yet" she added. "I want….I need to find out what happened to her and what Franco had to do with it. I'm not coming in until I do".

"How do you know for sure that his hands aren't clean?" Nick asked. "Lay it out for us". She took a deep breath before starting to explain.

"My first job was to deliver a package to a guy named Alonzo. He knows Franco".

"Why is that weird?" Carisi asked. "Franco should know anyone who was involved with Elena, right?"

"Yeah, he should know them. But they shouldn't know him. And Alonzo, he's not in any files we have. Elena didn't put him in her notes and he's not in any intel we have on the crew she was working with. But he knows who Franco is". She looked over her shoulder to make sure her cab was still there. It was. "And he knows who I am" she added. "I met another guy today, Dante, and he knows me too. They both said that Franco has been talking about me. Franco wasn't under with Elena so the only way that they could know is if he's a player in the drug ring".

"Chris, don't be stupid about this" Fin said. "You gotta come in and let IAB handle it".

"Yeah" Carisi said agreeing. "I mean, I don't know as much about this whole undercover thing as Fin and Nick do but it doesn't sound smart for you to stay in with him. Especially if he had something to do with Elena's disappearance".

"They're right, Reyes" Benson said speaking up. "You need to end this now. Call Schiller and tell him what's going on".

"No. I can't" she said shaking her head. "I need to finish this".

"Hey mamacita" they heard on the other end of the phone.

"Que pasa?" Christina said obviously not talking to them. They heard the man's voice again but couldn't make out what he was saying.

"Chris?" Amanda said into to the phone. "Christina?"

"Sí. Sólo déjame terminar esta llamada" she said with the receiver to her ear. (Yeah. Just let me finish this call). "Hey" she said talking to her girlfriend and teammates.

"Who's there with you?" Nick asked.

"Yeah. I got it. I can pick it up later" she said telling him she couldn't answer his question outright.

"Someone you already met with?" he asked.

"Mhm hum" she mumbled.

"Dante?" he asked.

"No, not that one".

"Alonzo?"

"Sí. Que debería estar bien". (Yeah. That should be fine).

"How does he know where you are?" Fin asked.

"I have no idea. Let me look into it and I'll get back to you".

"Christina, you have to get out of there" Amanda said worriedly.

"No, it'll be fine. Just give me some time to check it out. I'll talk to you soon. Bye". Before they could say anything else, she hung up the phone.

"We have to go in for her" Amanda said.

"How?" Amaro asked. "We don't where she is or who she's with. Going in without that info could get her killed".

"He's right" Fin said in agreement. "We've gotta know when and where if we're gonna get her out. She's gotta call it, not us".

"So what do we do? Just sit around and wait for her disappear like Elena did?"

"There's nothing we can do?" Carisi asked.

"We wait for her to call back" Nick said. "That's all we can do right now". Amanda took her phone and stormed out of Olivia's office.

"Amanda" Fin said calling after her.

"Let her go" Olivia said. "You both know undercover, how it works" she said looking at Nick and Fin, "how long should we wait?"

"Well she has to check in with Schiller next week" Nick said.

"So we wait a whole week?" Carisi asked. "What if she's long gone by then, like Elena?"

"It's the only option we have" Fin said. "We wait for her to call back or to hear from Schiller, whichever comes first".

"Alright" Benson said with a nod. She dismissed them and told them to get back to work. She told Fin to keep an eye on Rollins, make sure she was okay. He assured her that he would. She was just as worried about her detective as the rest of her squad was. She hoped she wasn't making a mistake by waiting and not calling in to Captain Hawes immediately about the possibility that one of his detectives was dirty. All she could do now was wait and hope that her detectives' experience with undercover work was right.


	44. Chapter 44: Not Without a Fight

**AN: Hey all! So as usual please leave your comments and suggestions. I read them all and appreciate the feedback very much. Hope y'all enjoy!**

Chapter 44: Not Without a Fight

"Are you stalking me?" Chris asked after she hung up the phone and turned to Alonzo.

"Nah. I had a meeting over here" he said explaining him being there.

"A meeting huh?"

"You don't believe me?" She shrugged. "I'm looking to expand my business. I had to come check out my competition".

"I see" she said with a nod. She walked over to her taxi and opened the door.

"Does that scare you?"

"Why would that scare me?" she asked confused.

"Ah, that's right. You're with Franco".

"So…."

"So you're no stranger to the nature of this business" he said with a shrug.

"What business would that be?" she asked playing clueless.

"When are we going out again?" he asked ignoring her question. Chris laughed.

"I don't know. Franco's kind of…shortening the leash".

"Ah, he found out about our date?"

"He knows I had a date. He doesn't know it was with you".

"Well, if he finds out, puedo protegerte" he said moving closer to her. (I can protect you)

"Why would I need protection?"

"I heard he can have an explosive temper".

"You heard?" He nodded. "Heard from who?"

"Can't give away my sources" he said with a smirk.

"Oh ok" she said with a nod. "Well, I have to go. Hasta luego". (See you later)

"Luego" (Later). She got in the taxi and it pulled away from the curb. She made it back to their undercover apartment just before four o'clock. Franco was sitting on the couch drinking a beer.

"Should I even bother asking where you've been?"

"Nope" she said simply. She went in the bedroom and shut the door behind her. She changed into sweats and t shirt then lounged in bed, reading through their case files. She added new notes to the ones that Elena had already started. And started new pages for Alonzo and Dante. She pulled out her phone and started a page in her notepad on Franco. She didn't want to think about all the possibilities of how this could end. She hoped that Franco had nothing to do with Elena's disappearance. Whatever happened, Franco would be going away for a long time. She'd been in the bedroom alone for two hours when Franco knocked then opened the door and told her he'd order pizza. She came out to the living room and sat with him to eat. "So you seem be getting in well with the crew. Monte and Ernesto trust you" she said starting conversation. He nodded his head as he took a drink from his beer.

"Yeah. You too".

"They trust me because of you" she pointed out. She'd been thinking of how she'd confront Franco about his role in the drug ring. She knew the best thing to do would be to keep her mouth shut, her head down, get proof that he was the leader and let IAB handle it. But she couldn't do that. She couldn't wait that long. She couldn't hold it in anymore. "What the hell are you doing, Franco?" she asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about".

"You know exactly what I'm talking about" she said angrily. "¿Crees que estúpido? Do you think I can't see what's going on here?" she asked raising her voice. 9Do you think I'm stupid?)

"¿Qué? ¿Qué está pasando?" (What? What's going on?)

"Eres sucio!" she yelled. (You're dirty). "Is that why you brought me in? You thought I'd help you out, look the other way? Did you think that we'd be partners?"

"You're wrong" he said calmly.

"Am I?" He nodded. "How do you know Alonzo?" she asked bringing her volume back down.

"I don't" he said simply.

"He sure as hell knows you. So does Dante and the girls from the club the other night. Everyone knows Franco. And you know who else they know?" she asked rhetorically. "Me". Franco sighed and continued to drink his beer. "How the fuck do they know us, huh?" she asked raising her voice again.

"Alright" he said slamming his beer bottle down on the table. "I'm dirty. You happy?"

"Why? Why would do this? Throw your career away, your life away. Why?"

"Because I was sick of it" he snapped. "I was sick of it Christina. Sick of watching you struggle trying to take care of yourself and your family".

"Don't you dare" she said stopping him from going any further. "Don't you dare say you did this for me. You didn't do this for me. You did this for you".

"I've put in years of work taking these guys down" he said looking at her, "and I put them away. And you know what they do? They have their crew working the whole time they're in prison. Just racking up more drugs and more money. They come out of prison and pick up right were they left off. They live comfortable while people like us scrape together nickels and dimes. Overworked, underappreciated. I was sick of it. So I got in the game" he said with a shrug.

"What happened to Elena?"

"I don't know". He picked up his beer and took another drink. "She got in with Alonzo's crew and that was it".

"So what are you saying? Alonzo did something to her?" she asked.

"He must have" he said simply. "She was fine before she started hanging out with him". Chris wasn't sure whether to believe him or not. Alonzo seemed like a smart, cool headed guy. If anything he'd use Elena's relationship with Franco to his advantage. He wouldn't just get rid of her. Anyways, it was Ernesto who'd sent her to Alonzo. She wouldn't be surprised if he'd done the same thing with Elena.

"I cannot express how disappointed I am in you Franco" she said sadly. He nodded his head and finished his beer. "We're gonna finish this. We're gonna find out what happened to Elena and take down these crews and then you're gonna turn yourself in to IA". He laughed and rubbed his temples. "Usted tiene que hacer lo correcto. Que sigue siendo quien eres. Que tiene que ser" (You have to do the right thing. That's still who you are. It has to be). Chris got up from the couch and went back to the bedroom. She brushed her teeth then got in bed and went to sleep. Franco stayed up half the night trying to figure out what his next move would be. He couldn't wait around for Chris to turn him in to IAB. He had the perfect thing going until Elena got in with Alonzo and his crew. She messed everything up for him. Now Christina was threatening to do the same. But he knew he couldn't handle Chris like he handled Elena. He'd have to be smarter this time. He went into the bedroom still unsure about what he was going to do. The only thing he knew for sure was that he wasn't going to let Chrisina or IAB take him down. Not without a fight.

The next morning Chris woke up early and went for a jog. She jogged all the way to Alonzo's house, hoping he would be awake. She knocked on the door and waited. Jauquin answered the door and ushered her inside. She waited in the living room while he got Alonzo. After five minutes, Alonzo descended the stairs in nothing but sweat pants and socks. It was obvious he'd just woken up. He went over and sat down next to her on the couch.

"You always up this early?" he asked rubbing his eyes. Chris nodded.

"Yeah".

"Estás loco" he said with a yawn. (You're crazy).

"Si" she said simply.

"Quieres sube las escaleras?" (You want to go upstairs?) She thought about it only for a second.

"No".

"So, what is it then?" he asked. "Why'd you come over so early?"

"I was out for a jog. I just thought I'd stop by" she answered. "You asked when we'd go out again".

"Yeah. You said Franco was tightening the leash".

"Yeah well, I cut it" she said with a smirk.

"Is that right?"

"Um hum" she mumbled. "So, here I am". He stood up from the couch.

"Let me go get dressed". She nodded and relaxed into the couch as he headed upstairs to get ready. She wasn't sure how this would play out with her and Alonzo but she felt like he was her best bet at finding out what happened to Elena. She knew he had history with her and he'd already told her, in not so many words, to watch her back with Franco. She wanted to know why he thought she needed to. He came back downstairs fifteen minutes later and they left the house together. They walked to a small family owned diner and got a booth in the corner. Alonzo ordered an orange juice and the big breakfast platter. Chris decided to have waffles, eggs, and hash browns with coffee. "So what made you do it?" he asked taking a drink from his glass. Chris gave him a confused look. "You said you cut the leash. What made you do it?" She shrugged her shoulders.

"He was getting a little out of hand" she said putting sugar in her coffee, "y usted dijo que me protegería" she added (And you said you could protect me). "Did you know Elena?" she asked frankly. "Is she why you think I need protection from Franco?"

"Why would you say that?" She shrugged.

"I've been hearing stories".

"What kind of stories?" Their waitress came over with their plates and sat them down in front of them with a jar of warm syrup. "Gracias" Alonzo said to the young woman. She smiled and nodded then went on her way. "What kind of stories?" he asked again.

"That Elena was with Franco. Then she started hanging around you. Franco found out, he wasn't happy about it. Then, she was just….gone".

"Hum" he mumbled before taking a mouthful of food.

"You said you heard he had an explosive temper" she said as she cut up her waffles. "Did Elena tell you that?"

"Ella era una chica agradable" he said not answering her question (She was a nice girl). "She wasn't like you. She was in over her head in this business. Franco shouldn't have been using her".

"What makes me so different from her?" she asked curiously.

"Usted es duro. Usted puede manejar usted mismo. That's why I want you on my crew" he explained (You're tough. You can handle yourself). "Elena, she was a bundle of nerves all the time. She fucked up a lot. I tried to get her right; paired her with Laila. She must've told Franco about that because the next we saw her….let's just say Franco proved how much a man he isn't". Chris took that to me that Franco had hit Elena the same way he'd hit Ernesto that night at the club after she asked about Alonzo.

"Why would Franco be mad about her working for you? Or about me working for you?"

"I used to work with Franco" he admitted. "Franco, Ernesto, Monte…..we were on the crew together. Franco, he was cool at first. Then he started taking over things, moving up the ranks. I didn't like how he operated so I went on my way".

"And he just let you go" she asked in disbelief. He nodded.

"He knew he couldn't stop me" he said with a small laugh. "Let's just say I had some intel that he didn't want getting out".

"So you're rivals now?"

"Nah. I stay out of his way, he stays out of mine".

"But you didn't stay out of his way" she stated more than asked. "You took Elena". He shook his head.

"I didn't take Elena. She was sent to me" he corrected her. "The same way you were. Think about it". She did what he said and started to put some things together in her head. Ernesto was running drugs and money with Alonzo behind Franco's back. If he used Elena and she told Franco then she might've told him that it was Ernesto who sent her there. She could add him to her short list of people who had something to do with her disappearance. If she was telling Franco things he didn't want Franco to know, she was compromising his arrangement with Alonzo.

"So am I next then?" she asked pretending to be nervous. "Am I gonna disappear like Elena did?"

"Not a chance" he said confidently. "de ninguna manera" (No way). "Like I said, you're not like her". They finished their breakfast and then left the diner together heading back to Alonzo's place. "I got a job for you" he said as they walked in the house. "You up for it?"

"Yeah". He went upstairs and came back with a bag like the one Ernesto had given her on her first job. "You take this to Ernesto. He'll give you something to bring back". She took the bag and put it on her shoulder then left the house and headed to Ernesto's apartment. She went up and knocked and was let in by some girl she'd never seen before. Ernesto came to the living room, took the bag, went to the back and came back with a different bag. She took it and started to leave.

"Oye" he said stopping her, "Not a word of this to Franco". She nodded her head and left the apartment to go back to Alonzo's house. She delivered the package to him. He was pleased. He reached in his pocket and took out a wad of cash, counted out five bills and gave them to her. She took the money and shoved it in her pocket. He said he would call her if he needed her for anything else or when he wanted to go out again. She laughed and nodded then left his house and headed back to the apartment. When she got there Franco was still in bed. She grabbed some clothes and went in the bathroom to shower and get dressed. When she came out, she had a message from Monte to meet him at the club in an hour and for her to come alone. She remembered how upset Franco got when they gave her jobs without running it by him so she woke him up to ask him.

"Hey" she said shaking him awake.

"What?"

"Did you get a message from Monte?" she asked. He lazily turned over and grabbed his phone to check his messages.

"No" he said putting his phone back down and turning over to go back to sleep. "What does he want?"

"I don't know. He just said to meet at the club in an hour" she said leaving out the part about him telling her to come alone.

"Ask him what he wants" he said with his eyes still closed. Chris texted him back asking what was up. He responded that she'd find out when she got there. She told Franco what he said. He sat up, grabbed his phone and made a call.

"What do you want with her?" he asked angrily. "What did I say? No. I said no jobs for her unless you ask me first. She's not coming. Give it to Rosita or Marisol". He hung up the phone, put it back on the night stand and then laid back down.

"Wow" Chris said, "You really are in charge, huh?"

"Damn right" he said closing his eyes to go back to sleep. Chris chuckled because she knew things that he didn't. Franco thought he was in charge but really Alonzo was running the table. He had Ernesto. Ernesto had Monte. Monte had everyone else. Sooner or later, Franco wouldn't have a crew to call his own and they wouldn't need him anymore. He'd have to fall in line under the new boss or they'd get rid of him. But she knew Franco. She knew that he was backed into a corner and no matter what he told her, he wasn't just going to just turn himself in. He wasn't going to go down without a fight.


	45. Chapter 45: Losing Control

**AN: Hey all! I'm so sorry. It's been forever since I updated. I left my flashdrive at home when I came back to school from winter break and all my stories are on it. I had to wait for my sister to find it and mail it to me. But I'm back in business now so here's an update. As always, please leave your comments and suggestions. I appreciate all your feedback so much. Hope you enjoy!**

Chapter 45: Losing Control

Franco finally got out of bed just after one in the afternoon. He went to the bathroom then out into the living room looking for Chris. She was gone. He called her cell but got no answer. He went back in the bathroom to shower then changed his clothes. He grabbed his wallet and cell phone and then headed out of the apartment to the club. He went in through the back door into the private room. Monte was there with Rosita. He was cutting, weighing and bagging product and she was counting money. Franco went out into the club and a few minutes later he came back.

"Where is she?" he asked looking at Monte.

"¿Quien?" he asked confused. (Who?)

"Christina". He shrugged his shoulders.

"No se". (I don't know).

"She didn't come here?" He shook his head. "No me mientas". (Don't lie to me).

"I'm not lying. You said she wasn't coming so I called Rosita". Franco took his phone out of his pocket and called Chris again. Still, she didn't answer. He was about to call again when the back door opened and Ernesto walked in with Christina and Marisol close behind him. Chris had a cup in one hand and a tray of drinks and Marisol had a bag, which he presumed had food in it.

"I've been calling you" Franco said as she walked over. She set the drink tray down before sitting down at the table.

"My bad" she said nonchalantly.

"Hmmm. Tacos" Rosita said happily after looking in the bag of food.

"I thought we agreed you weren't coming here today?" Franco asked sitting down next to Chris.

"Well, I wasn't gonna sit in the apartment and be bored all day, now was I?"

"Hmmm. These shakes are so good" Rosita said before taking another drink to wash down her tacos.

"Hurry up and get back to counting" Monte said rushing her to finish eating. "We got a delivery to make. Don't wanna be late because you're busy stuffing your face". Rosita rolled her eyes and gathered her trash to throw away. Then she rejoined them at the table and started counting again. Chris took some bundles and started to help her count and Marisol helped Monte cut and bag product. Franco and Ernesto were off to the side having their own conversation while the rest of them worked. After about ten minutes of whispering, Ernesto went over to the safe, took out a bag and brought it over to the table. When he opened it, Chris saw guns inside. He handed them out one by one before looking at Chris.

"Usted sabe cómo usar esto?" he asked referring to the handgun (You know how to use this?). She nodded. He handed her the gun. She checked the mag and the safety then secured the weapon in her waistband. "Let's start loading up". Monte finished bagging the rest of the product while they loaded the finished bags and money in the truck. Chris went over to Franco.

"We're carrying guns now?" she asked folding her arms over her chest. "What the hell Franco".

"We need to protect ourselves" he said casually.

"Where'd you get these guns?" she asked. He just looked at her blankly then walked away. She sighed and shook her head.

"Hey" Monte said getting her attention. "Let's go". She walked out the back door and went to get in the truck. He picked up the last bag from the table and walked out behind her, pulling the door shut and locking it before getting in the truck. Franco pulled out of the alley and headed to their destination. After a half an hour drive, they pulled up outside of a warehouse. Franco turned off the truck and they waited. Five minutes later a truck pulled up beside them. The engine shut off and three Hispanic men got out.

"Rosita, Marisol, Monte" Franco said looking at them through the rearview mirror, "wait here". He looked to Chris then Ernesto, gave them the nod and they got out of the truck.

"You have the product?" one of the men asked.

"You have my money?" Franco asked without answering.

"We see the product then you see the money".

"Nah. That's not how it's gonna work. I want to see my money". The guy looked at his friends and chuckled. He made no moves to get the money so he could secure the product he'd come to buy. Chris could tell that Franco was getting aggravated and she had a feeling that things were about to go south. She knew what Franco knew. They had no plans of handing over the money. They'd come to rip them off. She instinctively placed a hand on her weapon. The man that was doing all the talking nodded to one of the men next to him and before any of them had a chance to make a move, Franco pulled his gun and shot him in the head. Chris was stunned but she had only a moment to act because the man standing in front of her started to reach for his waistband. She pulled her gun, released the safety and put two rounds in his chest. She heard three more shots ring out next to her and looked in time to see the third man fall to the ground, put down by rounds from Ernesto's gun. "Get the money" Franco said looking to Ernesto. He nodded and stepped over the bodies to the truck. He opened the front door and popped the trunk. Christina stood there staring at the three bodies on the ground in front of her. Then Franco stepped in front of her.

"Why'd you do that?" she asked barely audible.

"They were gonna rip us off" he answered. She looked up at him.

"So you killed him?"

"Hey, we still got a cover to maintain" he reminded her in a whisper. "So get your shit together. Get in the truck". She took a breath before turning around and went over to the truck. She looked back at the bodies on the ground one more time before getting in the truck.

"¿Estás bien?" Marisol asked looking at Christina. (Are you ok?). She gave a silent nod then looked out the window at Franco and Ernesto as they went through the dead men's pockets, taking their wallets, phones and guns. Franco walked around and got in the driver's seat while Ernesto wiped his prints off of everything he'd touched in the car. Then he came over, got in the truck and they drove off, heading back to the club. They unloaded the truck putting the drugs, money and guns back in the safe and locking it all up. Franco and Chris left the club to head home while the rest of them stayed to set up for the club to open. When they got back to the apartment, Chris started pacing in the living room. Franco watched her from the kitchen. He took a beer from the refrigerator, found the bottle opener in the drawer and popped it open.

"You need to calm down" he said before taking a drink.

"I need to calm down? Are you out of your mind?"

"We did what we had to do" he said nonchalantly.

"No, We" she said gesturing between them, "didn't do what we had to. I did what I had to because you shot that guy for no reason" she said angrily.

"He was going to rip us off" he said restating what he'd said earlier.

"Like I said, for no reason".

"What you thought they were just gonna take out product and let us go?" he asked. "They would've killed us Christina".

"You don't know that" she argued.

"Come on, Christina. Don't be foolish. You know how these things work. They wouldn't have let us walk away".

"You shot him before you had a reason to Franco" she said angrily.

"So what" he said with a shrug. "You gonna report me?" he asked. "You killed someone too. Remember that".

"You're not serious". She couldn't believe he was doing this.

"Dead serious mi amada" he said looking her in the eyes. "If you try to take me down, I'm taking you down with me". She glared at him for a moment longer before turning and going into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her. She undressed and changed into running clothes, put some cash and her phone in her armband and attached her headphones. She walked out of the bedroom and walked towards the door, ignoring Franco who was calling after her not to leave the apartment. She left the building, putting in her headphones as she went, and started walking down the block. When she was ready, she picked it up to a jog. She kept going until she got to the pay phone that she'd made her first call to Amanda from. She checked the time and thought that she should still be in the office and hoped that everyone was there with her. She went in the corner store and asked for some change then went back out to the phone. She put coins in then dialed Amanda's number and waited for an answer.

"Rollins" she answered.

"Hey babe" Chris said into the speaker. "Are you in the squad room?"

"Hey" Amanda said happy to hear her voice. "Yeah, I'm here. We're all here". She got up from her desk and gestured for Fin, Amaro and Carisi to follow her. "Are you okay?" she asked as she knocked on Olivia's office door.

"I need to get out of here". Amanda heard Olivia say to come in. So she opened the door and they went inside. Fin shut the door behind him and Amanda put Chris on speaker phone.

"What's going on?" she asked worriedly.

"I need to get out" she said again.

"What happened?" Nick asked.

"We had a buy today and…." she leaned her head against the pay phone shelter and took a deep breath. "Franco's losing it" she continued.

"What do you mean losing it?"

"He killed a guy" she said plainly. "He just….he shot him".

"Why?" Fin asked.

"The deal was going bad. They were gonna rip us off" she answered.

"Did they draw down on you?" Nick asked.

"No" she said almost yelling into the phone. "No" she said bringing her voice down. "He was just pissed off because the guy wouldn't show him the money. He's doing this on purpose. He's trying to set me up".

"What are you talking about?" Olivia asked.

"I confronted him. I told him that I know he's dirty" she admitted. "I know I shouldn't have but I just couldn't pretend with him" she said feeling like Nick and Fin were going to jump on her for giving that away. "I told him that we'd finish this and then he had to turn himself in but I know Franco. He's not gonna do it. He's not gonna go in voluntarily. He's gonna make us take him down".

"But you said he's setting you up" Carisi said speaking for the first time. "How?"

"There were three men at the buy. After Franco shot the first guy, I shot the second guy. I killed him" she said sadly.

"I'm sure you didn't have a choice" Olivia said.

"He reached under his shirt at his waistband and…"

"Then you did the right thing" Nick said not even waiting for her to finish. "You did what you had to do to protect yourself".

"But I didn't see the gun. I just saw him reach under his shirt. I should've waited until he drew" she said thinking back on what happened. "I should've waited".

"If you had waited, he could've killed you" Olivia argued. "You did the right thing" she said trying to reassure her.

"He did it on purpose" she said angrily. "There were five of us and only three of them and we all had guns. That buy would've went our way no matter what but he told the two other girls in the crew and Monte to stay in the truck. Franco had no intention of selling to them".

"He wanted them to think they had the upper hand" Fin said putting together what Chris was saying.

"What does that mean?" Amanda asked.

"These guys sometimes set up buys with no intention of actually selling product" Nick said explaining. "They pick the crews that are known for ripping people off. Then at the buy, the crew lives up to their reputation so they kill them, keep their product and take the money. They make a profit and get rid of some of the competition in one go".

"He did this on purpose" she said again. "He said if he's going down then he's taking me down with him".

"But he can't, can he?" Carisi asked. "I mean the shooting was justifiable. On your end anyway".

"It doesn't matter. He's gonna do whatever he thinks he needs to do to save himself. If that means he has to get rid of me, he will" she said confident that she was right. "Look, I'm pretty sure I know what happened to Elena and that's what I came to find out so I'm done with this".

"Who the hell are you talking to?" Chris heard from behind her. She turned to see Franco standing behind her.

"Who is that?" Amanda asked. "Chris" she said when she didn't get an answer. "Christina". Still, she didn't get an answer. Just a click and then a dial tone.

"Are you stalking me now?" she asked annoyed.

"I told you not to leave the apartment" he said angrily.

"You don't tell me what I can and cannot do".

"You seem to have forgotten what went down earlier" he said smugly. "You killed a guy".

"I did what I had to do because you went off halfcocked". She was really pissed off. She couldn't believe that Franco was seriously threatening her to save his own ass.

"We both know I saved our asses".

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that" she scoffed.

"Get in the car" he said pointing towards the cab he had waiting.

"No" she said folding her arms over her chest.

"Get in the damn car" he yelled.

"No. Let's not forget what we're doing here Franco. You can posture all you want but you need me. Unless there's something you're not telling me. Something about Elena maybe?" she asked accusingly.

"Don't get beside yourself".

"Oh, I won't. You're already doing that enough for the both of us". She knew he couldn't do anything to her. They were there to find an undercover officer that'd gone missing on his watch. If anything happened to Christina suspicion would fall on him, especially since she'd been in contact with SVU behind his back. He glared at her for a minute longer then turned and went back to the cab. She waited until it pulled out into traffic to pick up the phone and call Amanda back.

"Christina what's going on?" Amanda said answering without saying hello.

"My check in with Schiller is in two days. I'll call you after I talk to him".

"You gonna tell him about Franco?" Carisi asked.

"Yeah, I am. I have to. Franco's losing control of this thing. His only option now is to find a way to get rid of me".

"Why don't you just call Schiller today?" Amaro asked.

"Because I just used all my free time to call you".

"Who was that before?" Amanda asked.

"Franco. He followed me here". She looked into the store window and saw the reflection of a truck that looked familiar to her. She turned around and saw Ernesto in the driver's seat. The only way he would know she was there was if Franco told him. She nervously cleared her throat and turned her back to him. "I have to go".

"No, Christina wait" Amanda said worriedly.

"If anything happens to me question Ernesto".

"Who's Ernesto?" Fin asked.

"He's Franco's number two. He's the one that got rid of Elena and he's here right now waiting for me to go with him" she said quickly. "Franco must've sent him".

"Don't get in the car". Amanda knew this was a bad idea from the beginning.

"Just remember if anything happens to me, find Ernesto".

"Chris" Amanda yelled into the phone.

"Amanda, I have to go" she said regrettably.

"Christina".

"I love you. I have to go". She hung up the phone and went over to the truck. Ernesto rolled down the window as she approached. "What are you doing here?"

"Franco sent me to get you" he said simply. "We got a run. Get in". She hesitated for a second before getting into the truck. She didn't know what was going to happen but she was preparing herself for the worst. Meanwhile, back at the precinct, the SVU was arguing about what to do to help her.

"She's with the guy that killed the other undercover" Amanda said angrily. She was pissed off that even now, when Christina was definitely in danger, they still didn't want to pull the plug on this operation. "She said Franco had something to do with that and now he's sent the same guy after her".

"Amanda we can't just go in for her" Nick said, "it doesn't work like that. I know it doesn't feel like it right now but we are trying to keep her safe" he assured her.

"If we're gonna go in for her, we need to have a plan" Fin jumped in, "And that plan has to come from Chris. She's on the inside. She has to call the shots".

"The worst thing we can do for her right now is jump the gun" Amaro said trying to calm Amanda down. "If we go in at the wrong time, it could blow her cover and she'll be in even more danger than she is without us interfering".

"Christina knows what she's doing" Olivia said looking at Rollins. "She knows Franco. She's in the best position to resolve this and bring him in peacefully. We have to trust her. You have to trust her" she said firmly. Amanda took a deep breath and nodded her head then got up and left her office. "Keep an eye on her?" she asked looking to Fin. He nodded his head then he left her office followed by Amaro and Carisi. Again, they were left to wait and hope that nothing happened to Christina before they could get to her.


End file.
