Glee Guilty

Sunday 7th October 2012

Guilty.

It had at least been four week since Blaine sent Kurt away to New York, because that is where Kurt belonged. Blaine was feeling really lonely. He used to be with Kurt everyday in Glee Club, school, after school and on the weekends, now he was lucky even if he got a five minute chat with his boyfriend on the phone. He knew Kurt was busy but it felt like when they talked it was always about Kurt and his work. Blaine was happy for him but it hurt. When Blaine won senior class president he had to lye to Artie about him being proud of him but the truth was Kurt didn't even pick up his phone, he was to busy hanging out with his cool new boss.

Blaine always had a thing for singing when he doesn't know what to say. He was in the auditorium singing Barely Breathing and just imagining Kurt sitting there like he used to. Blaine could see him sitting in his cloths he wore the first time they met. He called them his spy cloths, that one day Kurt had come into his school spying on the Warblers as the New Directions had made him. That was the day he fell in love with him, but Blaine just thought it would be best for Kurt to have a friend before they got into anything. All these memories kept flying to him, the good memories and the sad memories of when they fought. They made them stronger.

After singing, Blaine was sitting alone in the choir room on his phone. He poked a guy on face book with the name Eli. C. Eli replied saying 'What's up, sexy?' this made Blaine smile but the thought of Kurt never came into his mind 'Want to come over?'. Blaine didn't think about the consequences about what would happen between him and Kurt. It just happened he went over and it happened. He was a cheater. He cheated on the one person he loved the most. He had to tell Kurt, because the guilt was eating him alive.

Blaine was meant to be going to New York in two weeks but he decided to book a plane ticket. He didn't want to tell Kurt over the phone but in person. Even if it did mean he got a slap from Kurt, would have been the first time it happened. Blaine was packed and left for the airport.

A few hours later he was outside Kurt and Rachel's apartment. He had a smile on his face, a big one. Until it hit him he was going to tell Kurt what happened, he just let the fact that he cheated roll off him. He knocked.

Kurt opened the door to find some one behind a bunch of roses. Blaine looked round them "Surprise!". "Blaine!" His face light up like a light bulb, he was so happy. "I wasn't expecting you for another two weeks." Kurt said after Blaine gave the roses to him. "I know I just couldn't wait any longer. I missed you too much." They hugged.

Blaine was greeted by Rachel hugging the death out of him. Finn was there Kurt's big brother, this was going to be a nightmare, Blaine thought. He shook his hand. Everyone was so happy even Blaine, he got to see his boyfriend. Should he even call him that any more?

A little bit later they were all in 'Call Backs' a NAYDA bar where all the students from NAYDA went. Blaine looked sad and felt guilty. He didn't want to ruin Kurt's first night in New York with him. Kurt knew something was wrong. "What's wrong you seen a little low." Kurt asked, Blaine just said the first thing that came to his mind, "It was a rough flight. I got stuck with the middle seat.".

Kurt has a smile on his face the one smile that Blaine could call his because Kurt only smiled like that to him. "Well I'm glad you came. This is the first night in New York together! I'm never going to forget this!" Kurt said. Blaine was going to be sick. This guilt he was feeling was very bad.

Rachel and Brody, who was a nice guy and from what Blaine heard from Kurt was Rachel and Brody kissed before Finn came. After Rachel and Brody sang, 'Give Your Heart A Break' as a duet that sounded wonderful. Blaine wanted to sing, Brody told him to go up.

Blaine was sat on the stool at the piano. "Um, Hi everyone. I want to sing a song that's very special to me. This is a song that I sang the first time I ever meet the love of my life. So, Kurt this is for you." Kurt had the biggest smile in the room. Blaine started sing 'Teenage Dream'.

"Before you met me I was all right but things were kind of heavy. You brought me to life, now every February you'll be my valentine, valentine." There was a slight pause. Blaine felt all the sadness surface along with the guilt of cheating on Kurt. It hurt him so much, but he had to pretend there was nothing wrong. He looked out at Kurt, and started to sing again. "You make me feel like I'm living a teenage dream. The way you turn me on. I can't sleep, lets run away and don't ever look back. Don't every look back." Blaine was so emotional his voice kept breaking throughout the song. By the time it was at ending of the song. Everyone knew there was something wrong, Blaine was barely getting the words out. He was crying, small tears rolled down his face. He knew he had done wrong. He messed everything up.

Walking through the park, Blaine and your were small taking. They were talking about home, in Ohio and how things have been. Until Kurt says, "That song was extremely moving. I guess I'm kind of wondering why that was?" looking at him. "I guess, I just. I have just really miss you." Blaine replied, "I miss you too. I'm glad you're here. But you have been so emotional and weirdly sad, please stop pretending like there's nothing wrong." with this out Blaine stopped.

Kurt was wondering what was wrong, Blaine took a moment his eyes started to water, "I was with someone." Kurt felt like someone punched the air out of his lungs, he couldn't breathe. Kurt couldn't believe what he was hearing, his eyes started to water but he promised himself he wouldn't cry in front of Blaine. "It was Sebastian wasn't it." Kurt asked. "It doesn't matter who it was. It didn't mean anything. It was just a hook up, okay? I was by myself and I needed you. I needed you and you weren't there, I was lonely. I'm really sorry." Blaine replied.

"You don't think I have been lonely? You don't think I have had temptations? But I didn't act on them because I knew what it meant. It meant something horrible and wrong." Kurt said still trying not to cry, but he did it was all coming out. Why did his Blaine do this to him? Because he was lonely, Blaine always told him to tell him when something was wrong. When why didn't he tell me this wasn't going to work? They could have sorted this out.

"I sorry Kurt. I really am." Blaine said. Kurt walked off, leaving Blaine in the park. Blaine started to sing, "I really feel that I'm losing my best friend. I can't believe this could be the end.". Kurt still walking off sang, "It looks as though you're letting go and if it's real, well I don't want to know." Kurt finally sitting down on the side of the fountain, was trying to work out what had just happened. It didn't feel good.

"Don't speak I know just what your saying. So please stop explaining. Don't tell me cause it hurts." Blaine walked over towards the fountain, sitting beside each other. Just kept singing, "Don't speak, don't speak. Don't tell me cause it hurts."

They were in the apartment both singing the last few lines of the song, while they climbed into bed. Not looking at each other or speaking. Blaine just thought, this was his fault all his. "Our memories well, they can be inviting but some are altogether mighty frightening. As we die both you and I. With my head in my hands I sit and cry."

"Don't speak, don't speak. Oh I know what your thinking. And I don't need your reasons. I know you're good. I know you're good. Don't tell me cause it hurts." Both falling asleep just wishing this day hadn't happened. Everything was turning out worse than it was planned. They were supposed to be living in New York together in less than a year, but how was Kurt meant to trust Blaine after this. He slept with someone that wasn't Kurt. That thought killed Kurt the most.

Kurt woke up during the night, Blaine still asleep and went out to sit in the living room. What Kurt didn't know was at the same time Finn and Rachel had been fighting. Kurt was sitting out in the dark with his tea, sobbing at how six months ago nothing was planned to be like this.

Finn walked quietly out of Rachel's room with his bags packed. "You can't just run away, Finn." Kurt said with a flick of the light switch the lamp went on with Kurt sitting there, red puffy eyes. "You scared me. What are you doing up I thought I was the only one." Finn asked. "I have been waiting for somebody to come out. I was hoping it would have been Blaine.". "How are you guys?" Finn asked sadly. "I kind of feel like I'm going to die. I'm guessing I don't have to ask what you are doing?" Kurt replied. "Don't tell her." with that said Finn gave his little brother a hug goodbye.

Kurt left for work before Blaine had the chance to wake up. Blaine felt so alone, It was killing him. He never planned to hurt Kurt, but it happened like that. Sadly he got on the plane and left New York for Ohio. Blaine sent red and yellow flowers to Kurt at his work with a note, I'm really sorry Kurt, Please forgive me. Xo xo xo Blaine.

Blaine could remember the time Kurt gave him red and yellow roses when he got the part in the play. Kurt was so proud of him. It hurt that it was just one thing that could tare to people apart from one another.

Blaine just wondered if the guilt in his heart and the pain of what he did to Kurt would go away. He just had to give Kurt some space and someday Blaine would get Kurt's trust back again. Only time will tell.


End file.

Glee, Angst, Romance