Naruto 1. The new canon (Part 1)

_How I think Naruto should end. ;)_

_Have a random drabble-product... Don't expect too much of it. This will be a collection of continuations/random ideas/drabbles/what have you that are not polished/edited very well. That said, I hope you enjoy this... And we can't have enough NejiTen, can we? ;) I was looking at NejiTen fanart and awwwww some of them are just so adorable!_

**_Update: Cover image drawn by N__airil on FFN! Thank you so much!_**

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

The air is still when Naruto casts the jutsu that revives the dead from the war - Tenten is a little too groggy, a little too numb to think that this will really work; it's better not to hope, and risk falling - not when it concerns Neji, not when it seems like forever since he's left her behind.

The survivors stagger to where they've piled their dead. Tenten trails behind, seeking out Lee first, and helping him with the heavy, unconscious weight of Gai.

"Do you think-" Lee begins, cautiously, and Tenten shakes her head.

"I don't know if I can bear to raise my hopes, Lee," she tells him tiredly, her footsteps dragging beneath the burden of carrying Gai. At least their sensei is still alive.

"But Naruto can do anything, can't he?" Lee asks. She exhales, purses her lips.

"There's only so much one can do," she responds, and looks at the broken ground, piled with rubble.

* * *

Neji opens his eyes and blinks. Agony is sharp in his chest; he gasps his first breath in a long while, and remains lying still for a long time. There is a flurry of activity going on around him, and someone nearby shoves her head in his face.

"This one's come back to life too!" she shouts, and people hurry over - medics, or what's left of them.

Neji feels himself being examined, the hole in his chest slowly being sealed, and wonders how long it's been since he took those stakes. Whether Lee and Gai and Tenten are still alive, if they managed to survive the war-

It suddenly occurs to him that, perhaps, Tenten might not have made it - what would he do without her levelheadedness and sanity and comforting touch-

He reminds himself to calm down, and to wait. They might still be alive, after all. He hopes Tenten won't try to kill him for leaving her. Dying once is enough for this lifetime.

* * *

"Hey," Tenten's voice resounds behind him. Neji turns, and he sees the uncertainty in her eyes, the weariness.

"I'm sorry," Neji tells her, and dips his chin. "I had to save Hinata-sama and Naruto - Naruto was the one who could save everyone else."

"I know," she sighs, and drags a grimy hand over her face. "I dreamed of you in the illusion we were put through." At his questioning look, she continues, "We were all cast under a spell and bound in cocoons - it was supposed to make us dream of our perfect world."

"I'm in your perfect world?" Neji questions, intrigued. Tenten flushes slightly, and looks away, waving her hands to dismiss the matter.

"Yeah, you were with me and Lee and Gai knew how to act like mature adults, for once." She gives a wry smile. Slants a look at their teammate and mentor. "I'm glad you're back, Neji. Maybe this is just another dream."

He catches her arm as she makes to turn away, and pulls her against him. "I'm sorry for leaving you behind."

"You did what you had to. I can't fault you for that." Tenten is still for a moment, though she relaxes into him after heartbeats. She is warm, soft. "Lee was sobbing over your dead body."

Neji glances at their teammate, and smiles lightly. Team Gai is still his family, after all. The medics are working on Gai now, slowly healing the severe burns on his body. "What about you?"

She shifts uncomfortably against him, her voice muffled by his shoulder. "I couldn't. We were in the middle of a war, Neji, I couldn't just- I figured that I could mourn over you if I survived."

"You'd mourn over me?" he asks, a faint smile tugging on his lips.

"Well, yeah." She pulls away slightly, to look at him in disbelief. "Did you think I wouldn't?"

"I don't know," he murmurs and shrugs, looking away, a light smirk tugging on his mouth.

Tenten catches sight of his amusement, and Neji doubles over when she punches him in the gut. "Don't you dare laugh at me like that, you jerk-"

"That hurt," he grits, wincing. "I just returned from the dead-"

Her eyes are wide with horror. "I'm sorry!" Tenten gasps, mollified. "I- I didn't mean to, I swear-"

Neji closes his eyes and draws deep, calming breaths, and finally looks at her when the pain has ebbed away. "Thanks," he says dryly, straightening. "I needed proof that you weren't an impostor."

Tenten gapes at him and fumbles for words, and Neji decides that he's had enough of all this skirting around and all the missed opportunities and the subtle flirting that never amounted to much even before the war began.

So he dips his head and catches her lips, effectively shutting her up, and somewhere in the distance, Lee whoops and shouts for joy.

* * *

_Found the ending hilarious. ;)_

_Story/drabble suggestions, anyone? I will only write what inspires me, no promises. :P _


	2. Trapped in Eternity

_I wasn't going to update this until I posted the last part of Postcards... But I was inspired to write this particular drabble, and finished it in an hour, so here you go :P It's sappy stuff that you've probably seen in other NejiTen fics before, but I had to get it out of my system. :P There is a continuation to the first part... look out for that too._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

_when all the words you've left me with  
don't seem to go away_

How many times can a heart break? Twelve hundred and thirty-three times, that's how many, because Tenten has watched this scene over and over and over and it never ends, not once. They appear in their different combinations, each one just as terrifying, because Neji dies in front of her, each and every time.

How many times can you regret not saying _I love you_, or _you mean everything to me_, or _I want to be part of you_ before the words are etched across your skin, dripping blood?

She's running in front of him, to intercept that one _kunai_, only for him to be struck from the back.

She's taking that stake for him, the third person that jumps in front of Naruto, but it slips through her as if she were invisible, and spears Neji instead.

She's pushing him away, from certain death, but the enemy avoids her, and is beside him in a split second, drawing a dagger across his throat-

How many times can you watch your teammate-friend-confidant-love die in front of you before you turn the blade upon yourself? Tenten doesn't know, because with each cycle, she's that much closer to driving the knife into her stomach, to escape from this agony-

_Don't do this, Tenten, I believe in you._

_Don't do this to me, Neji, I can't be strong anymore,_ she whispers to him, his ghost lingering by her ear, and the wheels of the sharingan spin, high in the sky, sealing her fate.

* * *

She collapses into white warmth, panting, sobbing, the sun too bright in her eyes, and all she whispers is his name, _Neji, Neji, don't leave me._

Tenten doesn't believe when he says her name, doesn't believe when he pulls away and looks at her, really looks at her. _You're a ghost,_ she tells him. _Where am I?_

_I'm not a ghost, Tenten. You were in a genjutsu cast by Sasuke,_ Neji tells her, and she shakes her head, disbelieving, because he is going to die again - after a thousand times of Neji dying, he is going to again this time, she's certain of it, fearful of it-

Her fingers clutch at him and she's pressing her chest to his, protecting her heart, gasping. _You're going to die again_, she tells him breathlessly, _you've died a thousand times and you're going to leave me again-_

_Is that what you saw in the illusion,_ Neji murmurs in her ear, his tone low and soft, heartbreakingly gentle. Tenten stills, doesn't dare believe, doesn't know what to think. If she tells him this time, maybe she won't have so many regrets. Before he dies- Hurry, Tenten, there isn't much time-

_I need to tell you something,_ Tenten gasps, still clutching at him, still disbelieving.

_What is it?_ Neji strokes a steady hand over her back. There is no one around, just him and her. An eternity ago, there was Gai, and Lee, and Neji, and herself, against one Uchiha Sasuke. An eternity later, there is just Neji, and her, and she thinks this is just another cycle of agony in the never-ending torture-

_You mean everything to me,_ Tenten tells him, her eyes darting around, because there could be enemy _nin_ coming in anytime, to take him away from her.

But there isn't, and Neji pulls away from her, just slightly, resting his forehead against hers. His breath falls on her skin and his eyes are shadowed, pale lilac.

_I won't leave you,_ Neji says, softly, and hot tears are spilling from her eyes when his lips meet hers-

-And she's kissing him, her eyes wide open, because she needs to see him to believe that this could be real, that the palm he cradles her cheek with isn't a fragment of her imagination.

_What do you need to believe that this is real,_ Neji whispers against her lips a long time later. She shakes her head, doesn't know what she can trust- And before she knows it, Neji is pulling his _hitai-ate_ off, and unwinding the bandage around his forehead, just above the green seal. He presses it into her palm, closes her fingers around it. _This is real,_ he tells her, _remember this._

Neji taps a point on the back of her neck, and all Tenten knows after that is the serenity of unconsciousness.

* * *

Tenten awakens alone, much later, in the hospital. For a moment, her chest seizes - Neji is dead - and she can't breathe, can't think-

Her fingers squeeze around soft fabric, and she slowly glances down at her fist. It takes forever for her fingers to relax, before a rumpled mess of bandages falls from her palm, and she remembers the brightness, Neji's eyes, and lips, and the green seal.

She sits upright in bed, heart thundering. The sensor next to her begins to beep.

_This is real,_ he's told her, _remember this._

_Neji,_ Tenten whispers, uncertain.

Two bundles of green burst into the room, shouting words of joy, and Tenten is glad for their presence, because they are family, but Neji-

He walks in then, eyes immediately seeking and locking onto her. Neji becomes a blurry mess of white, and Tenten scrunches her face up and wipes at her tears, because she needs to see him, damnit, and all this wetness is preventing that.

He stops by her bedside, disregarding the green beasts, and softly asks, so she can barely hear him, _I didn't leave you, did I?_

Tenten wraps her arms around him and presses her face into his midriff - having them all around her is heaven, and she can't ask for anything more than this.

* * *

_Awww ;) not my best work, but yay for sappiness!_


	3. The new canon (Part II)

_This is a continuation of the first drabble-thing. ;) It gets a little sappy, but oh well :P I did also create a tumblr for more previews and stuff if you're interested - link is on my profile._

_The contents of Tenten's dream here are actually from what I wrote in Postcards. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

"What was that about?" Tenten breathes, when Neji pulls away from her, in the midst of all the rubble and remnants of war. She touches her lips tentatively, searches his eyes.

Neji smiles at her, because she's returned the kiss (she kissed him back and parted her lips to his). "What do you want it to be?" he asks. They have all the time in the world now, because he's alive, she's alive, and Team Gai is back together again.

She seems to hesitate for a moment, blinking at him. "I don't know," she murmurs, and buries her face in his shoulder. "What are we allowed to have?"

"Right now, I don't really care," Neji tells her. "Coming back from the dead should give me special rights."

"Oh? Like what?" Tenten draws away and lifts her eyes to his. (Neji thinks he can't get enough of looking into her eyes.)

"Like getting a private room somewhere," he smirks at her, and turns away, leaving his suggestion hanging between them.

"Coming back from the dead has turned you into a pervert," Tenten mutters, just loudly enough for his ears. "What did they feed you on the other side? Aphrodisiacs?"

"Close enough," Neji answers, the corners of his lips quirked. Tenten is looking shrewdly at him, her lower lip caught between her teeth, and he is entertaining the thought of tasting her again when Lee approaches them with a bright grin.

"Welcome back, my eternal rival!" Lee exclaims, and pulls Neji into a tight hug. Neji looks at Tenten over Lee's shoulder, awkwardly patting Lee on the back. She grins, and steps in, sandwiching Lee between them as she hugs them both, and Neji takes the opportunity to steal a kiss behind Lee's back (literally).

"I'm glad you're all alive," she tells him and Lee, with a small smile.

When they've separated themselves from each other, the trio makes its way to Gai's side - Gai looks much better than before, raw wounds scabbed, his chest rising and falling lightly.

"We're proud of you, Gai-_sensei_," Tenten tells the sleeping man, and Lee bursts into fresh tears once more.

"He should recover within the next few days," the medic tells them, and leaves with a short bow.

* * *

Gai is still sleeping when they sit around him and begin to recall stories from the past, before the war, days when it was just them and Gai-_sensei_, and B-ranked missions and absurd training schedules and cries of youth.

They've set up camp for the night, together with the rest of the Konoha shinobi, and Neji is getting a little weary of all the people who have come up to him to tell him how glad they are that he's alive. (He knows it, doesn't need to be told a hundred times how fortunate he is.) Neji does thank Naruto, though, for all he's done, and Hiashi comes by to check on him, for the second time that day.

Tenten and Lee are busy in the temporary kitchen, helping dish out food to their compatriots - Neji is sitting by Gai and watching them when his uncle makes his presence known, with a light clearing of his throat.

"I see that you've been recovering, Neji," Hiashi begins, settling down beside him.

"My body is slowly healing," he acknowledges. (Tenten had forced him to get on her back, and piggybacked him for a significant distance, just as Lee did for Gai, because she didn't believe, for a moment, that he's already recovered from his stake injuries.)

Hiashi follows his gaze towards Lee and Tenten, and the pair sit in silence for minutes.

"I was informed of the capabilities she displayed during the war," Hiashi remarks at length. "Her proficiency with the _bashosen_ and strategic planning, among other things."

Neji nods, having heard about them from Tenten herself. (She still dreams longingly of the _bashosen_.) He figures that Hiashi has not just come by to discuss what Tenten did, however. "Your point, Hiashi-_sama_?"

Hiashi cracks a tiny smile at that. "You are ever-perceptive, Neji. I wondered if you had any plans with regards to her."

The pieces click instantly into place in his mind, and Neji grasps his uncle's point without missing a heartbeat. "You are suggesting marriage."

Hiashi nods, and continues to smile.

"Surely it's a little too soon to be discussing this," Neji points out. He's just returned from the dead, after all, and there isn't even an intact village to call home.

"It is never too late to set things in motion, however," Hiashi answers mildly, hands folded in his lap. Lee and Tenten are still as busy as ever, doling out food on makeshift plates, while the other active shinobi deliver sustenance to those who are still recovering. A handful of Naruto's clones are running around, and Neji wonders at his never-ending energy.

"Will there be objections to her lack of a clan name?" Neji finally asks. He's hasn't even really broached the subject of a relationship with Tenten yet. (She did return his kiss, though.)

"She's more than proven her worth during the war," Hiashi replies. "I have noticed your... interest in her."

Neji glances askance at his uncle, and tries not to flush. It figures that there were eyes watching when he kissed Tenten.

"I owe it to my brother - your father - to see that you have a say in your life, Neji," Hiashi tells him sagely.

"My eyes have been sealed," Neji comments. The finality of that hasn't quite sunken in yet, not when he hasn't required the use of his byakugan.

"I could arrange for someone in our clan to exchange eyes with you," Hiashi muses, and Neji looks quickly at him. "One of those who are not _shinobi_."

"I'll think about it," he answers quietly. It doesn't sit well with Neji to burden someone else with his eyes, when he is the one who has caused them to be this way.

"Neji, Hiashi-_san_," Tenten greets as she steps up to them, balancing four bowls on a makeshift tray. Lee tags along behind her. "Have you eaten, Hiashi-_san_? I meant this bowl for Gai-_sensei_, though it doesn't seem as though he's awake yet - I could always get one for him later..."

"I've already eaten, thank you," Hiashi tells her, and sends a meaningful look towards Neji, before rising to his feet. (Neji narrows his eyes - he doesn't need to be told what to do, damn it.) "The clan appears to require my presence - good evening, Neji, Tenten, Lee. I hope Gai recovers quickly."

Hiashi studies the unconscious Gai for a moment, and then departs, leaving Neji alone with his team. Tenten hands a warm bowl and makeshift spoon to him.

"Eat it while it's hot, Neji. What were you talking about?" Tenten settles beside him, with Lee on her other side.

Neji shrugs lightly and tucks into his food, staring after his uncle. "Clan matters."

He thinks Gai might be dreaming in his sleep, because there's a small grin on the older man's face that is missed by the other two. Neji turns and concentrates on his other teammates instead.

* * *

They are lying side-by-side, beneath the cloudy sky, and a small fire crackles some distance away. The majority of the _shinobi _have fallen asleep, save for scattered groups of twos and threes, who sit around to keep watch, or just talk.

"What else did you dream of in that illusion?" Neji asks, quietly, beneath the snoring of Lee, who is sleeping on the other side of Gai. He slips his hand into hers, and smiles when she squeezes his fingers lightly.

"I, um..." Tenten trails off, and he watches as she looks away. Her cheeks are a little darker than before. "Well, in the dream, we spent some time together after Lee and Gai had the sense to leave us alone."

"How did we spend that time together?" he probes, curious. If the idea of them sharing private moments was her idea of a perfect world, then it couldn't be too bad a dream.

"We, um, got drunk and, um, did stuff," she stutters, completely avoiding his eyes. "Woke up in bed together... you know, things like that."

Neji feels a little indignant then. "And you accuse me of being a pervert?" he asks, lowly.

"I, um, well, that was a dream!" Tenten mutters. "I couldn't control it!"

"But you wished it enough that it would occur in your perfect world," he reasons, and smirks. It is enough of an excuse to press a little closer to her, to touch the curve of her throat. She inhales sharply. Glances at him from the corner of her eye. "What else happened?"

"Well... we got married. It was a winter wedding," she tells him quietly.

"It's almost winter," Neji observes.

She shifts uncomfortably next to him. "Um, it was just part of my dream, I swear, you wanted to know what I dreamed about-"

"Tenten."

She stops talking and looks at him then, the faint flicker of firelight dancing in her eyes. He rolls over onto his side, so that there is a mere inch between their faces.

"I deduce, from this conversation, that you don't have objections to being my wife," he begins. Wide eyes stare back at him. Tenten blinks quickly, and her lips move, but she says nothing.

"I- um, I don't have a family name," she admits finally, looking away. "I don't see how we'd-"

He tips her chin back towards him, and covers her mouth with his. Tenten stops talking then, melting against him, her lips sliding against his, warm and moist, parting in invitation.

They find themselves on the verge of tugging at their clothes some time later, and Neji pulls away from her, to restrain himself. "Hiashi-_sama_ came by to discuss that earlier," he tells her, and she goggles at him. "He was the one to suggest marriage."

"I, um," she stutters, and red floods her face. Neji thinks he likes this look on her.

"Well?" he asks, lifting his brows.

"Do you even have to ask?" Tenten finally grins, and cups the back of his neck with her fingers, pulling him close. "You know my answer, Neji."

* * *

_Yes, this is how Naruto ends. I am disillusioned but that is okay because I have NejiTen ;)_


	4. That was just a spar!

_Written as a response to someone on Tumblr... there may or may not be a sequel to this :P _

_In other news... I realized that all my latest updates on the various fics (including Postcards!1!) had like an average of 110 readers... while it is nice that there are still people following NejiTen out there, it would be helpful to gauge reader response to these things (and sometimes that influences what I write/post). Sooooo, leave a comment if you have thoughts/suggestions? ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

It is one of those nights in the village when a surprising number of the Konoha 11 guys are _not_ on a mission. Naruto, as usual, has suggested a guys-only dinner, and Lee, fun-loving Lee, is among the first to agree to it. Neji grudgingly follows, if only to make sure that Lee doesn't consume any of that damn alcohol that could spell potential disaster.

Thus, it is to Neji's aggravation when the guys embark on their usual discussion of women; that mutt, Kiba, is all but drooling over Ino's lack of clothes, Naruto gushes about how pretty Sakura is (Neji isn't sure if he wants Naruto anywhere near his cousin), to which Lee declares his everlasting love for Sakura, and pronounces Naruto as his second eternal rival. Shikamaru slouches in his seat, chewing on his straw in boredom, and Choji is content to pull the plates of leftovers towards himself.

"Hey, hey, have you heard of that game," Kiba grins wolfishly, perking up. "_Bang, Marry, Kill?_"

Neji stiffens in his seat. He doesn't want anything to do with that. Next to him, Lee is all ears and gleaming teeth.

"What youthful game is that? I would like to learn it!" he exclaims, and Neji breathes a long-suffering sigh. It is a little too late to shut Lee up with a well-placed hit to the neck.

"Don't tell me you haven't heard of it, Fuzzy Brows," Naruto says, with bright eyes and a grin. He holds up three fingers. "Basically, you pick out three girls in the village - one you'd screw, one you'd marry, and one you'd kill."

Lee gasps in horror. "I have to choose someone to kill? And- And, Gai-_sensei_ said that you only share the passionate dance with someone you'd marry!"

"Well, it's just a game," Kiba grins, and Shikamaru grumbles beneath his breath. Neji hopes that they end the game before it gets to his turn, because he's really not going to answer that-

"So, who's going to start first?" Naruto looks around the table, skipping over the uninterested expressions of Neji, Shikamaru and Choji. "Well then, I think I should begin."

He jabs his thumb into his chest and the expression on his face turns sly quite suddenly. "The girl I want to marry... is Sakura-"

Lee howls at that.

"The girl I wanna bang... um... Hinata," Naruto continues, and both Neji and Kiba are glaring at him, spikes of murderous intent causing nearby patrons to look around worriedly.

"You will not speak of Hinata-_sama_ like that," Neji threatens, his Byakugan activating of its own accord. It is preposterous, that the man his cousin is head-over-heels for would think of her in such basal terms-

"Oi, don't insult my teammate like that, bonehead," Kiba growls, grabbing Naruto by the throat.

The blonde looks at them and gulps, realizing the danger he's in. "I, um, I think I'd rather bang Shizune instead," he stutters, and deflates in relief when the murderous intents subside. "And um, I'd kill Anko-_sensei_, I guess, she's scary."

"I guess I'm next," Kiba smirks, finally satisfied with Naruto's answers. "I'd bang Ino, of course, I mentioned that. As for who I'd marry... I think Tenten would be a good choice-"

That hot, murderous intent boiling deep in Neji's gut is back. It isn't jealousy, really, Neji tells himself.

"Um, well, actually, I rather like Hinata-" Kiba stutters, and Neji glares warningly at him, but says nothing, because at least Kiba has more honorable intentions towards his cousin than Naruto does. "And I would kill... Orochimaru's mom."

"She's probably already dead," Naruto grumbles, looking sourly at Kiba. "That's a cop-out, and you know it."

Lee is raising his arm in the air before Kiba has a chance to explain himself. "I'm next!" he exclaims, "I would like to marry Sakura-_san_! And, well, I guess if I marry her, I should do the passionate dance with her-"

There's a light flush on Lee's cheeks. Kiba and Naruto stare at him; Neji looks away, and weighs the different options to remove himself and Lee within the next two minutes. He is definitely not going to make a fool of himself, even if Tenten is the one he'd like to marry, and would secretly love to have in his bed- But there is no way Lee is going to hear about it, because he can't keep a secret for nuts, and-

"Hey, Neji, it's your turn," Naruto prods slyly, leaning forward in his seat. Neji blinks. Wasn't Lee going to come up with a third name? He glances at Lee for an explanation, and is faced with an expectant look; Neji realizes a little too late that his attention slipped between Lee's second answer and now, and he's run out of time to remove himself-

"I need to return to the Hyuuga compounds, it's getting late," he tells them, turning to leave.

"But Neji! You said you had all night!" Lee protests, with wide eyes.

Why is he even spending time with this idiot, again?

"You're just trying to run away from the game," Naruto teases, grinning so wide that his eyes have turned to slits. "Come on, we all know that you like Tenten-"

"I do not!" he snaps, "She's just my teammate-"

"Neji, you have feelings for our dear lotus?" Lee looks at him, inky eyes staring into his.

Neji shifts uncomfortably in his seat. It is one thing to lie by omission, but he has enough morals not to fill Lee with untruths-

"You should really tell her about it before someone else comes along and talks her up," Kiba suggests, fangs glinting in the low light.

"Were you trying to kiss her the other day?" Lee gasps, his face glowing with enlightenment. "When- When you pinned her down during our training and-"

"That was just a spar!" Neji grits, heat creeping up his neck. He had no idea that Lee saw - it would be bad if Lee told Tenten, because Tenten has no clue about this at all-

"But Neji-" Lee protests.

"You're just a coward who doesn't dare to admit his feelings," Naruto says in a sing-song voice, waggling his eyebrows knowingly. Neji feels the greatest sense of injustice, knows he's cornered-

"Lee, there's a squirrel under that table," Neji points, and Lee looks in that very direction, which just so happens to have a faint movement beneath a table. Lee bounds off with a delighted shout; Neji turns back, and fixes his comrades with a glare. "Yes, I will marry Tenten, I will bed Tenten, and I will kill every single one of you if she gets wind of this."

He sets enough cash down to cover his meal and Lee's, and stalks away, grabbing Lee by the scruff of his neck.

"My squirrel!" Lee sobs, straining against Neji's grasp.

"We're leaving, Lee," Neji mutters, still fighting his blush as they leave the establishment.

"Now you've got Choji and I into this mess," Shikamaru grumbles at the silent table and folds his arms. "How troublesome."

"Well, at least they left some food behind," Choji grins, stuffing his face with the last dumpling.

Naruto stares at the swinging door in awe, finally muttering, "Tenten should totally hear about this."

* * *

_I wonder how Neji would react lol :P_


	5. Adventures on the 582

_And... yet another photography-themed piece. ;) This was inspired by my close friend Matt, and being jobless. ... I still have another 5 or so updates for this collection, and about 6 more chapters for f/2.8, ISO 100, and a 6-parter Digimon/Elf!Neji story... sounds like a lot to post omg. (Wondering if I should release them slowly, or do multiple updates a week, like what has been going on these few weeks...)_

_To all reviewers, thank you for your support! You know who you are. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

Tenten shoved her hands in her pockets and scowled. Today was a bad day, not in the least because she tripped over various things this morning, missed her bus and was late to work, her lunch showed up cold, her coffee spilled, and to make everything that much worse, she was unceremoniously fired over some stupid mistake.

Now she was jobless, cold, and tired. And hungry.

She shuffled to the bus stop and scowled, settling heavily on the seat (which was clean - she made sure to check), sighing. There would be enough cash to tide her through the end of the month, though she needed a new job, quick. Tenten scrolled through webpages on her phone, and began putting her resume together all over again.

The bus was early today (maybe her luck was turning? That job she had wasn't that great, anyway), and for the first time that day, Tenten smiled. It was a double-decker bus, too, and especially empty, which lifted her spirits considerably.

She paid her bus fare, and climbed to the upper deck, because the view from there was better. And there weren't as many eyes around.

To her delight, the last few rows were unoccupied - she chose the back seat, intentionally.

Because, you see, Tenten had just the one dirty little secret: she was a bit of an exhibitionist, and getting pictures of oneself on public transportation was no mean feat.

She knew this route home by heart, and also knew that it wouldn't be long before the rush-hour crowd boarded a few stops down the line. Her heart raced; she sat herself in the corner seat as the bus began to move forward, and pulled her phone out.

It was common knowledge that the higher-quality phone pictures were obtained with the camera on the back of the phone, and not the secondary camera just above the screen. With this in mind, Tenten began to tug her pants off, and undo the lower buttons on her shirt.

The setting sun was shining brightly into the top deck - all the better for her pictures. She bit her lip in excitement, angling the main camera of her phone at herself, raising the phone high enough above her that she would be able to capture not just her bare thighs, but the bus seat as well (because what difference would it make, if no one could recognize the backdrop in her pictures?)

Tenten checked her pictures to make sure that they were in focus, and had all the parts she wanted, and then checked her location. The bus was pulling up to a bus stop - there were two other stops before the rush-hour crowd. From the window, she spied a few people boarding, and pulled her pants back over her thighs, just in case. It never hurt to play it safe.

A couple of people made it up to the top deck, one sitting close to the front of the bus, while the other took a seat two rows in front of her - probably a woman, with that long ebony hair. (Tenten preferred to keep her face away from people walking down the aisle, so they didn't take as much note of her - all the better to keep her operations undercover.)

She breathed a sigh of relief when the bus began moving again, because no one was likely to switch seats now.

Tenten eased her panties off, took a picture, and parted her shirt, to reveal her midsection and bra. It was getting warm in here, despite the lack of clothes, and she bit her smile down.

She tried parting her legs this time, for another picture, and lowered the phone a little, so the camera captured her chest and thighs-

And the camera flashed.

She cursed and froze, wondering how she'd accidentally hit that button on the screen (that was inconveniently facing away from her), and if anyone saw the rebounding light in the rest of the cabin.

The lady two rows away turned, and looked at her-

Except she was a man, with pale skin and the lightest eyes Tenten had ever seen.

He looked between her, and the screen on her phone, and there was an odd look on his face, before he turned away, facing forward again.

It wasn't until Tenten moved to shut the camera application off on her phone that she realized that he had probably seen the real-time image of her bare body, that she was trying to capture on her phone.

Oh gods.

Tenten nearly fainted then, and set her phone down, trying to calm her nerves. She pulled all her clothes back on, buttoned her shirt, and sank down low in the seat, to hide herself from the man two rows away. He didn't look back at her. Tenten was both excited and incredibly nervous - what if he was a rapist?

The bus stopped a couple more times, and the rush-hour crowd started filling the seats. She shrunk into her own seat, and tried looking out at the darkening scenery outside the window, to distract herself. At length, the man pressed the buzzer and stood up to leave, though not before looking once at her.

Tenten flicked her gaze towards him, and her sense of foreboding tripled when she noticed that he wore a light smirk on his lips. Surely it was impossible for anyone to have eyes that pale, to have such fine features - and he was in a suit, no less. She tore her eyes away, and slid further down in her seat, breathing a sigh of relief when he finally moved down the aisle, and the stairs.

Well, the good thing about people on buses was that one was unlikely to see them ever again, right?

* * *

Tenten was dressed to the nines - she had an interview in an hour and was silently congratulating herself for nailing one this quickly; just a week after losing her job, really?

She checked her appearance after alighting from the bus (incidentally, the same one she had been taking between work and home), and made her way to the grand office building that stood not too far away from the bus stop. Tenten identified herself at the security counter, and made her way up to the eighth floor, where the receptionist told her to fill in some paperwork, and wait until her interviewer was ready to see her.

That, she could do. So she sat and went over her prepared responses, confident that she could pull this off.

Ten minutes later, the receptionist addressed her, and led her past a large office, with plenty of cubicles, to a small meeting room tucked discreetly in a corner.

"Mr Hyuuga will be here soon," the receptionist told her, and left Tenten in the meeting room. She chose a seat and fidgeted, eyeing the glass walls, frosted to maintain privacy, and the whiteboard on the wall, and the smooth wood of the meeting table-

The door swung open, and Tenten was faced with the same man on the bus, the very one who had long ebony hair and pale eyes and fine features and-

She felt like fainting. Or packing up and walking right out, right then.

She didn't.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Tenten," he greeted, coming to stand by her, holding his hand out.

Tenten wasn't sure if her eyes were bugging out; her heart was beating too noisily in her chest, and she couldn't think, not when his eyes never left her for one moment, and he probably recognized her from the bus and all that was going through her mind was _Oh hell no_.

She scrambled to her feet and shook his hand, and her voice came out as a squeak when she greeted him in return, "The same goes to you, Mr Hyuuga."

No, she was not pleased at all to meet him.

"My name is Neji," he told her, genially, and Tenten couldn't fight the feeling that he was looking into her with those eyes and picking out details that she was scrambling to hide.

"So, I've read your resume..." he began, and Tenten slowly relaxed when the interview went as one should go, with all the right questions and answers and how he seemed to give no indication of having seen her before, much less know what she had been doing on that bus last week.

Neji even got her to smile, with a scattering of dry humor, and it seemed as though he might have entirely forgotten the incident (even if she was wearing her hair in twin buns on both days). She was a little sorry when the interview drew to a close, and he stood up to show her out.

"Have a good day, Tenten - Route 582 should be less crowded at this time of the day, shouldn't it?" he added in his smooth baritone, right as she was stepping out of the meeting room.

She froze, and slowly turned to face Neji, speechless.

There was a smirk on his lips, that wasn't there before, and she gulped. So he did remember. She suddenly felt very naked in front of him.

"I, um, thanks," she muttered, nodded at him, and hightailed it out of there, keenly aware of the heat of his gaze as it followed her all the way until the office doors closed behind her.

* * *

Tenten did not hear back from Neji, or his company, and was very grateful for it - she eventually found another job, that was also on Route 582, and made very sure that she never took the bus that would reach his office at that particular time, when he got off from work.

It wasn't just the incident with the photos - she had been fantasizing about him every night since then, with his low voice and smooth hands, and how he would cover her body with his-

She bit her lip, and looked out of the bus window. At least he never discovered the extent of his impact on her. (Which was just as well, because some of those fantasies included stripping on the bus in front of him.)

Her eyes slipped shut, and Tenten relaxed into her seat, squirming when the familiar heat pooled in her belly, and she thought about his hand on her thigh and his voice in her ear...

Someone sat down beside her, and Tenten ignored the extra presence, thinking about Neji breathing against her neck, his hand creeping up her leg-

"Didn't think I'd see you here," Neji said, beside her.

Tenten jumped. Literally. A foot into the air.

She slumped heavily back into her seat and whipped her head around, to stare at Neji. "Where did you come from?" she asked, very shaken, and still feeling very warm.

"The office?" he answered blandly, lifting a brow. "Where are you working now?"

"I, um, a few stops further back," she told him, "Electronics."

He nodded, and looked away from her. Tenten bit her lip, and turned in the opposite direction. She noticed, then, that there were other empty seats on the top deck, in front of her, and looked back at Neji. "You chose this seat on purpose?"

Neji glanced at her, and his gaze wandered down her front. Tenten swallowed, dryly. "Do you need a reason for everything?" he asked.

"Um, yes?" she answered, figuring that she really wasn't going to see him any more after today, anyway. He was warm beside her, and ate into her space, a little. She found that she didn't mind. Especially when the bus lurched, and his arm nudged into the side of her breast.

"My apologies," Neji muttered, making to move away from her.

"It's fine, don't worry about it," Tenten hastened to say. "It's cold in here. Sharing heat is good, you know?"

What the hell was she telling a mere acquaintance? Tenten didn't know, only knew that she was more than a little affected when he looked at her, his eyes (they were lilac, she realized, not white) darker than before.

"Do you need more heat?" he murmured softly, so only she could hear him, though it wasn't a big deal, anyway, because there weren't many passengers on the upper deck yet (she'd chosen the back seat again, by habit, and was quietly glad that she had, because Neji was looking intently at her, and she could smell the cologne off him, the attention that he was fully giving her).

"What kind of heat?" she whispered, hardly remembering to breathe. Neji was leaning closer to her, his fingers brushing her bare thigh, up to her skirt, and beneath its hem.

"This heat," he replied, just as quietly, next to her ear, his warm breath feathering over her skin, and Tenten couldn't move when he dragged his nose against her cheek, and his hand slipped between her legs, finding where she'd grown tellingly wet. Neji's eyes snapped to hers, and she met them briefly, knowing he_knew_, and glanced away, embarrassed.

"I- I suppose," she answered, and gasped when he nudged her flesh through that thin fabric, and slipped his fingers into her underwear.

"I would like you to undress for me sometime," he told her quietly, fingers following the seam of her flesh, and Tenten shivered, parted her legs for him. Pleasure coursed through her nerves, and she bit down a moan, desire growing twofold when it dawned on her that Neji was interested in her, that he wanted more than this-

He nudged her sensitive flesh with a finger, and sent another further down, dipping into her, and it was all she could do to stop herself from crying out when he moved in her, slowly, his fingers wet with her moisture.

Neji took her earlobe into her mouth, and Tenten stopped thinking, could only feel, when he pushed her closer and closer to the edge with his nimble fingers- And pleasure exploded within her when he drew his nail across her swollen flesh.

He covered her mouth with his when she arched and tensed, swallowing her moan, and it was long moments before the ringing in her ears stopped, and she regained her senses, and ability to think.

Neji was wiping his fingers off on a handkerchief when she looked at him. Didn't know what to say. He smirked at her, and tucked the slip of cloth back into his pocket.

"I'll see you around," he told her, and pressed the buzzer, leaving Tenten to straighten her clothes dazedly as he made his way down the aisle, as if nothing had happened at all. Neji was gone before she knew it, and Tenten pulled her phone out, scanning the rest of the bus to see if anyone was looking her way. Somehow, they'd caught the attention of no one.

Her phone buzzed suddenly, and Tenten swiped at it, to display the message she'd received.

_I enjoyed meeting you on the 582. Hope to see you again soon. - Neji_

Tenten blushed then, and shivered in anticipation. Where was this going to go?

* * *

_... ;) And no, this is probably not going to be continued._


	6. Obon

_Just a little something for Halloween! (I didn't write it with Halloween in mind, but it just occurred to me that this is the right day to post it.) In other news, I just wrote the prologue of my baby, Complexities of Blackmail. ;)_

_Featuring TheLast!Tenten (because I want to see this scene but no one is writing/drawing it) - inspired off a quote from Tumblr._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Obon**

"Hey Neji," she says, more to herself, than him. "I know it's been a while, and I'm sorry I haven't been talking to you - but it's just been so busy here lately, you know?"

Tenten twists her braids into buns, and ties the trailing ends together, so they fall against the nape of her neck. "I mean, the village is almost completely back to normal - there's Ichiraku's _ramen_ stand, and the Hokage's office, and the training grounds and Forest of Death are all back. Just like the old days."

She pauses here, to step into her dress (it is an orange-red _qipao_ with gold swirls on the sides), tugging the zipper up her back. Neji would have liked this dress, she thinks. "Wouldn't you, Neji?"

It is easier - so much easier - to imagine that he's always around her, wherever she goes, because thinking of Neji's spirit perpetually beside her is better than thinking about how she'll never really see him in the flesh again. It still hurts, but she knows he's watching, that he's around when Lee and Gai are on the verge of making her pull her hair out, that he's smirking when they make her lose her cool and she pins them to the wall with a barrage of pointy weapons.

"I'll bet you find it funny to watch me suffer with those idiots," she mutters, grouchily. And all the same, Gai and Lee are her closest family left, and she doesn't mind them as much as she acts like she does.

"These scrolls are pretty cool, huh?" Tenten slips her hands into her miniature wrist scrolls - so much lighter than the huge one she carried in the past, and checks to make sure that they're the right ones for today. "Not like you'd try to steal them off me again, but I'm better prepared now."

Tenten pauses here to remember the incident, in which Neji - mellowed, mature Neji - actually hid her scrolls for an hour while they were returning from a mission. "Damn you, pulling pranks on me like that-"

"It's not like you didn't pull pranks on me yourself."

She spins around at the low, smooth voice, her heart leaping to her throat. "Neji?"

And he's sitting on the edge of her bed, in his traditional Hyuuga robes, looking almost solid, but not quite. Tenten swallows.

"It's _Obon_ today, or have you forgotten?" He smirks, and gets to his feet, walking towards her.

She smiles weakly at him, fondly, watching as he stops in front of her, touching his fingertips to her hair. "Yeah, I guess I did forget."

Neji has made appearances during _Obon_ in previous years, too - it is the festival of the returning spirits, and the one day she gets to see Neji again.

"I'm disappointed that you forgot about me," he says, with a light pout, and Tenten blushes.

"Look, I'm sorry! I was helping Hinata with her wedding and Sakura needed my weapons for something and Ino said she needed more flowers-"

He rests his fingertips at the bottom of her chin, a cool, tingling sensation, and Tenten falls silent, suddenly breathless. His eyes are still pale, and his forehead is smooth and unmarked. "Has there been... anyone else?"

She can tell that the question is a difficult one for him to ask, from the way his jaw tightens just a little (it's bittersweet how she still remembers so much about him). Tenten folds her arms, and smiles. "No one. You'd know that, Neji, if you've been hanging around."

He returns her smile then. "I get summoned to run errands sometimes," Neji admits. "Mother wanted some lilies the other day."

"What's it like in heaven?" she asks, curious, reaching up to touch his face. Neji isn't quite solid; her fingers will push through his ethereal features if she exerts just the slightest bit of pressure.

"Boring." Neji withdraws his hand, instead sliding it along the back of her neck. Tenten shivers. "It's quiet, hardly the same as with Gai and Lee around."

"You miss them," Tenten teases, and Neji frowns.

"I do not." But the quirk at the corner of his lips betrays his sentiments, and she grins in response.

"You missed me though," she suggests, and Neji does not deny it. "I got a new outfit."

"So I see." His gaze coasts over her, and Tenten shivers, because she feels the heat in his eyes, cool as he is to the touch. "It looks good on you."

"Are you flirting with me, Neji?" Tenten grins, mischievously, and steps back, twirling around to show him her dress.

"And if I am?" He smirks again, still looking at her, still with that hint of desire in his eyes.

She doesn't wait for him to make the first move; Tenten closes the distance between them and gently presses her lips to his, a tingling sensation on her skin.

He's looking at her when she pulls away with a tiny smile. Tenten raises her eyebrows. "Well?"

"Someday, I'd like to give you my family name," Neji says, quietly, and the weight of his words makes her chest ache. "Whenever the time comes for you to join me."

"You make death sound romantic," she replies, a light blush on her cheeks. It's the first time he's ever mentioned this, and Tenten is glad for it, glad to know for sure what she means to him.

He smirks, but does not reply, merely lifting his fingers to brush her jaw. Tenten is content to stand in silence with him for a while, to look at his features all over again, because he is around her most of the time, but she only gets this one chance to refresh her memory of his ghostly image every year.

"I wish I had more time to spend with you tonight," she murmurs, wistfully. "I'm leaving for a mission in an hour."

He looks over her clothes again, and back at her. "Is there anything to prevent me from following?"

"Don't you have to visit your uncle and cousins too?" Tenten probes, her spirits lifting. She can't help the grin that curves her lips.

"They can wait," Neji mentions offhandedly, dipping his head to capture her lips. "They know I'm here, anyway."

Tenten smiles, and returns his kiss.

* * *

_Yeah you know, this can be your Newer canon if you don't want to believe the other after-manga drabbles I posted. ;)_


	7. Obon: The Beginning

_I'm actually fine with the way the series ended. Seems to me that Tenten stayed unmarried because of Neji - and that is a far better fate than having her pop random kids lol._

_Anyway, this is what came before "Obon" - special thanks to _white noise and brine _for inspiring some ideas in here. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Obon: The Beginning**

She sees him the first time _Obon_ comes around after the war.

There are no tears left to shed; Tenten is nervous when she wakes up on the day of the _Obon_ festival, because everyone says that spirits return today, and she doesn't know if she'll be able to handle it if it isn't true, if she anticipates Neji's appearance and he doesn't show up.

So Tenten stays around in bed and doesn't drag herself out until her head begins to ache; she keeps her eyes shut and feels her way towards the bathroom, bumping into chairs and tables and the wall in between. Breakfast is a little more difficult - she squeezes her eyelids together and boils eggs, listening for the low rumble of water in the pot.

It's not easy to pass time when one's eyes are closed.

Tenten pours a little too much soy sauce on her eggs, and adds salt to her coffee instead of sugar. She winces, throws the coffee out. At least there isn't a mission today, she thinks, as she prepares another dose of caffeine.

"I'm not expecting you here," she tells the empty apartment. "I am perfectly fine minding my own business and this is an experiment to see how long I can keep my eyes closed for."

The hard-boiled egg is warm and savory on her tongue. She chews, and imagines Neji sitting across the table from her, watching her eat. It helps to imagine that he's always beside her, even if that's not actually the case.

"I don't miss you," she continues, and the yolk tastes like cardboard on her tongue. Tenten gives a dry laugh. "Who am I kidding?"

"You could've fooled me," says a voice from across the table, familiar and deep and mellow, like the crash of waves on a beach.

Her eyes fly open. The egg slips from her hand and bounces off the floor, and Tenten pushes herself backwards in her seat too quickly, so the chair tips and she lands noisily in a crumpled heap, bumping her shoulder and arm. "Ow. Neji?"

And he is beside her all at once, crouched over her, a frown on his silvery face.

Tenten doesn't quite believe her eyes. It is as if Neji has returned in the flesh, except that she can see the walls and ceiling through him. "Are-" Her voice doesn't quite come out right. "Are you real?"

A slender eyebrow lifts. "Does it look like I'm not?"

"Well, I can see through you," Tenten replies, blinking quickly. He doesn't disappear. It feels a little numb in her chest, after trying so hard not to think about him for so long. "How did you get here?"

Of course, he doesn't know what she feels for him, so Tenten doesn't hug him - she lifts a hand to his arm, gingerly prodding at his shirt. It feels as if she's dipping her fingertips into cool water, and his form does not offer any physical resistance to her touch.

"I descended from heaven," is his simple reply. His pale eyes have not left her; his forehead is smooth and unmarked.

"I- I see." Tenten gets to her feet slowly, brushing herself off. The realization that Neji is actually here hits her slowly, like taking a Dynamic Entry kick to her chest, except over a much longer period of time. "Have you visited your family?"

"Not yet," Neji answers, and Tenten blinks stupidly at him.

"Why not?"

Neji shrugs, looks away. "I thought I'd come see you first."

"Oh." Tenten fiddles with the hem of her shirt, and realizes that she hasn't got pants on. Heat prickles on her cheeks. She wasn't expecting Neji to show up this early, after all. "Um, let me get some clothes on," she stutters, hurrying towards her bedroom.

Neji is watching her amusedly when she returns. Before she can ask why, he explains, "I've been spending time around you even before today - your previous state of undress is a common occurrence to me."

"_What?_" Tenten gapes at him, and flushes harder. It's one thing to imagine Neji around her, but having him see her undressed, as well? "Why didn't you tell- I mean, weren't you always going on about honor?"

"I always look away," he tells her, offended.

The heat doesn't subside from her cheeks. "I'll trust you on that," she mutters. Despite that, there is so much to tell him, and Tenten wonders if he'll stay long enough for them to really talk. "When are you leaving?"

"Midnight. Are you going anywhere today?" Neji looks towards her door, and Tenten shakes her head. "I'll visit Hiashi-_sama_ and Hinata-_sama_ first, and return here right after."

Tenten smiles, and doesn't stop smiling even after he leaves. It is a relief to be able to see Neji again, even if she can't hold his hand, or do any of the things she's secretly dreamed of sharing with him.

* * *

Neji returns an hour later, and Tenten is content to sit cross-legged on the couch with him, shoulder-to-shoulder, talking about the restoration of the village, and their friends, and what they've been doing since the war ended.

It only occurs to her to ask, close to midnight, "Why do you spend so much time around me?"

Neji blinks, and looks steadily at her. "Should I not?"

She tenses and waves her arms at him, awkwardly. "No! No, that's not what I meant!"

"What did you mean, then?" Neji's gaze falls to her lips, and she wets them with her tongue, self-conscious.

"Well, um, I meant, don't you have others to spend time with? Like Hinata and your uncle?" Tenten explains lamely.

Neji shrugs, glances away. "I feel most comfortable around you."

A blush rises to her cheeks then, and Tenten looks in the other direction. "I- I see."

"I should be going," Neji says eventually, breaking the silence. There are a couple of minutes left to midnight. "Take care of yourself. I won't be able to watch your back."

"I'll miss seeing you around," Tenten responds, giving him a wan smile. The thought of him leaving makes her chest ache. Neji stands, and she follows suit, wrapping her arms gingerly around his shoulder. It feels a little strange seeing her arms through his body.

Neji brushes his cheek against hers, sending tingles across her skin, and then he's pulling away, putting distance between them. "I'll see you next year, Tenten."

Her smile is shaky this time. It isn't as if he's leaving her forever, though - she'll just be unable to see him for a year. "See you around, Neji."

He fades away then, and Tenten sinks back into the couch, wrapping her arms around her knees. There aren't any words to explain what she feels for him, so she doesn't try, doesn't bring it up at all, lest he gets put off by her emotions.

But it has been a good day, just being able to talk to Neji again, and Tenten smiles, inhaling deeply.

He's back in front of her a few minutes later, wearing a frown.

"What's wrong?" Tenten asks, looking up at him in surprise. "Shouldn't you be back in heaven by now?"

"I couldn't find the entrance back in," Neji tells her, his forehead furrowed. "I tried looking everywhere - it appears as if I'm locked out."

"Are they going to punish you for it?" Tenten winces. Surely heaven has rules about things like _Obon_.

"Possibly." Neji folds his arms and sits back on the couch. "I'll try again in the morning."

And that is how Neji comes to spend the week after their first _Obon_ in Tenten's apartment.

* * *

On any other day before his death, Tenten would've been over the moon to have Neji stay over at her apartment for seven days straight.

Today, however, he's starting to get on her nerves a little, because she can only stand to have Neji sleeping in her home and accidentally walking into the bathroom while she's showering (she forgets to close the door sometimes, and he turns on his heel and glides right out) so many times before she snaps.

It hurts to see him so close and not be able to let him know how she feels; she's regretted not telling him before the war, but now, after all the wishes and regrets, Tenten finds herself hesitating all over again - will Neji stop visiting if he knows what he means to her?

She wishes he wasn't around so much, so she can return to silently brooding upon her feelings for him, and she tells him just that, when she rounds the doorway into the kitchen and runs headfirst into his chest - and straight through him.

It's like stepping through a bucket of ice. Tenten whirls around and snarls, "Why can't you just return to heaven like all the other ghosts have?"

The apartment is painfully silent for a long time.

Neji turns slowly, to look at her, and the look on his face is unreadable. She regrets her words almost immediately, wants to claw them back, but her throat has sealed itself shut, and she can't breathe.

"I'll leave if that's what you wish," Neji says quietly, and Tenten screams for her lips to form words; her body has turned to stone.

_I'm sorry,_ she wants to shout, but the words are stuck somewhere between her mind and her mouth, and Neji's lips thin. He lowers his gaze, turns, walking out of her apartment.

She refrains from running after him; it is long minutes later before Tenten can even move, and her list of regrets is now ten times as long as it was before.

If he manages to find his way back to heaven tonight, she won't see him again for another year, and it hurts to think that Neji might not return to visit the next time _Obon_ rolls around.

Fear is an icy grip around her throat. Tenten dashes out of her apartment, looks frantically around for any sign of a pale shimmer, but there is none. She calls his name, twice - there is no response. There isn't any time to waste; she tears down the street, shouting his name, even if she looks like a complete idiot searching for someone long dead.

There isn't a ghost to be seen in their usual haunts, not the training grounds, or the forest, or the restaurants or the village square. Running out of options, now, Tenten makes her way reluctantly to the Hyuuga compounds, and Neji isn't there, either.

"Neji!" she calls, futilely. "I'm sorry, Neji, don't go away!"

The main gates swing open, and Hinata stands on their threshold, looking worriedly at her. "Tenten-_san_, you- you know that Neji-_nii_ is... dead, right?"

She feels her face crumple. "I- He- he's gone," she says brokenly, and the concern in Hinata's expression grows.

"_Obon_ was a week ago," Hinata informs her hesitantly. "Would you like to come in for some tea?"

"I-" The words die in Tenten's throat, and she shakes her head, turning away before Hinata sees the moisture in her eyes.

She stumbles back to her apartment somehow, through the haze of tears, and it is only after Tenten closes the door behind her and sinks against it that she lets herself sob, uglily, shoulders shaking.

Tenten cries until all her energy is gone, before she tilts her head back, wiping at her eyes and surveying her living room.

Neji is seated on her couch, watching her solemnly.

She snuffles in surprise, her body going instantly still. Had he seen all of that? Tenten gulps, flattens herself against the door when Neji gets to his feet, walking over to stop right before her. Damn it.

"I, um," she mumbles, not daring to look at him.

He raises a hand to her face, touching her chin with a cool fingertip, and the sensation is such a shock to her system that she looks up at him. His pale gaze ensnares her, renders her body motionless.

"Why were you crying?" he asks.

"I- Well, you left," she tells him hoarsely, swallowing.

"Is that enough to trigger such a reaction?" Neji lifts his eyebrows.

Tenten tears her eyes away then. "I didn't know if you were going to come back. I'm sorry - I spoke without thinking."

"I'll always return," Neji whispers. "You're the only one I want to return to."

Her gaze snaps back to him in astonishment - she thinks her heart might have stopped - and Neji leans in, brushing cool lips against hers.

Like a train collision, her thoughts crash and twist together into a grinding, squealing mess, and Tenten can't think, not when Neji tilts his face, and his lips cover her mouth. He pulls away after a while, with a slight crease on his forehead; she grabs the chance to move her lips.

"What does that mean?" she croaks.

Neji quirks an eyebrow. "What does that look like it means?"

"I-" Her mind begins to function then, and her cheeks are engulfed with heat when she realizes that Neji may actually feel the same way towards her. "You feel- you know how I feel."

He raises a palm, rests it right over her heart, and a chilly tingle washes over her skin. "Perhaps we should stop avoiding the truth."

Tenten blinks in surprise. "You've been doing the same?"

Neji gives a wry smile then.

"We should stop creating more regrets," he tells her, and falls silent, awaiting her response.

Tenten returns his grin then, finally, and covers his hand with hers. "Yeah, we should."

He leans in to kiss her again, and this time, Tenten opens herself to him.

* * *

_Yay for sappiness! Is the Neji-puppet rumor true? 'cause then Tenten can totally meet him in the movie and they can share more sappy moments lol_


	8. Girls and Toys Night

_Lots of people posting NejiTen these few days! Keep it up, everyone! ;)_

_This was inspired by my close friend Matt... lol. _

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Girls and Toys Night**

"Ladies and... ladies, welcome to Girls and Toys Night!" Tenten announces cheerfully, looking around at the small group gathered in front of her. They're at Ino's apartment tonight, and Tenten has spread her scroll out in front of them, ready to demonstrate the various toys she has available for sale.

"Is that your version of toys, or our version?" Ino asks dubiously (it is well-known through the village that Tenten's idea of 'toys' are her sharp, metallic tools).

"Your version," Tenten assures her, though she grins again. "But trust me, I've had experience with these too."

"What kind of experience?" Sakura is the next to pipe up. None of the girls have attended a pyjama party such as this, and all are just as curious as to what Tenten has in store for them.

Tenten winks at her. "Intimate experience. They're mostly for use either by yourself, or with a partner."

And she bites into her thumb, drawing blood, before pressing her palm onto the first seal.

A bright pink toy poofs into existence, and Tenten tosses it into the air, catching it deftly. It is a little palm-sized object, round at the base, with its other end extending into two points, like short rabbit ears. "The first thing I'll introduce is the rabbit vibe."

She holds it up to the girls crowded around her, and encourages them to touch its velvety, firm ears. When they've all done so, Tenten flicks the switch, and the silicone rabbit ears begin to vibrate, lightly, making a soft buzzing noise as it does.

Tenten passes the rabbit vibe around then. "I find that most handy when your bed buddy is out of town on a mission," she tells the girls. "See, the rabbit ears form a V shape, which fits snugly around your womanly bits, if you know what I'm talking about..."

Ino and Sakura grin at each other. Hinata turns red immediately. She did not expect the pyjama party to be about this. Beside her, Temari looks doubtfully at the toy, and holds it away from herself to examine it. "I'd satisfy myself just as well with my fingers," she states. "What's the point of getting this?"

Tenten grins then. "Ahhh, see, it doesn't quite feel the same when you're not the one doing the touching - I'm sure you know that. The rabbit ears have exquisite vibrations, a little different from the bullet vibe, which tends to be stronger-"

She presses her palm into the next seal, and holds up the silver bullet that the scroll surrenders. Tenten turns this on, and passes it around, because the strength of the bullet vibe speaks for itself. "It's sleek and tiny, and pretty damn discreet if you ask me," she adds.

Hinata flushes a deeper red. Ino's eyes bug out, and Temari regards this new toy with interest.

"Well, between Neji and I, we prefer the rabbit ears more," Tenten mentions casually, and all four pairs of eyes lock onto her.

"N-Neji-_nii_?" Hinata squeaks.

Ino smirks at her. "I didn't think Neji was the type to allow toys in the bedroom."

Temari lifts an eyebrow. "That effeminate guy with the long hair? He's your lover?"

Tenten smiles to herself. "He more than proves himself in bed. These are just supplementary materials."

Hinata looks as though she's about to faint (and Tenten feels a little sorry for her). Tenten collects the vibes and sets them aside, moving on to her third product for the night.

"Fluffy handcuffs," she says, holding a pair of black restraints up. "I bet you'd love for Naruto to use them on you, Hinata," Tenten adds, and the poor girl wavers in her seat. The other females grin.

"Yeah, combine that with the rabbit vibe," Ino suggests, waggling her eyebrows. Hinata gulps.

"And a blindfold," Sakura adds, smiling mischievously. "Your forehead protector works fine."

"Have any of you tried that?" Tenten asks, curious. "That is, being tied up?"

"No way," Temari growls. "I'm not giving Shikamaru the upper hand. _I_ tie him up."

Everyone is looking at the Suna kunoichi now, mostly in awe.

"Neji wouldn't let me," Tenten mutters ruefully, though a grin spreads across her lips. "Doesn't hurt to try again though."

"Hinata, you totally should tie Naruto up!" Sakura giggles, and the rest of them share a grin at the mental imagery she conjures.

"Yeah, I would buy you those restraints if you promise to," Ino offers, and Tenten lights up at the potential sale. Hinata stares at her, wide-eyed, and finally nods. Ino cheers.

"Anyway, if you girls ever want something a little more of an eyeful than that... There are always these," Tenten continues, unsealing a realistic-looking dildo, and a metal toy, that almost looks like a cylindrical sculpture with various ridges, but not quite. Hinata gasps. Ino squeals, and Temari eyes them with a smirk.

Sakura is the first to grab the dildo. "This will be helpful while Sasuke is still gone," she muses thoughtfully, her cheeks flushed. Ino grins and nudges her.

"I guess you can use them anally as well," Temari thinks aloud, turning the metal toy around in her hands. (That is the most expensive toy Tenten carries, so she doesn't expect that any of them would really purchase that.)

"You can use them any way you want," Tenten assures her, "Though don't try to bend them in two, of course."

"Have you tried them?" Ino questions, waving the dildo at her.

Tenten grins. "Neji absolutely loves watching me with the metal one... He tends to get a little envious of the flesh-colored one though."

Temari snorts; Hinata continues to blush, and Ino giggles.

"So... Is he as big as either of these?" Ino probes slyly, and Tenten flushes.

"That's private information!" she tells Ino. (Yes, he is, but Neji probably wouldn't want them knowing- Actually, he wouldn't mind.) "Don't you dare read my mind for it, Ino."

"Of course I wouldn't," Ino grins, and takes the flesh-colored dildo back from Sakura. "This can't beat a real man though."

"But what if he's away on missions?" Tenten presses, innocently, and unseals her sixth and final product for tonight. "I have a do-it-yourself kit here, that'll allow you to make a replica of the guy of your choice, so he'll be with you even when he's away." She winks.

The kit is passed around from one woman to another, and Temari is the first to ask, "Does it actually work?"

"Yes, it does!" Tenten exclaims. "It might be a little uncomfortable for him at first, since you'd have to make a cast of him, before you can make the mold... We've done it, it's not too bad."

"Wow, I didn't think you and Neji were so adventurous, Tenten," Sakura says with stark admiration. Tenten blushes and grins.

"Well, I have Neji to thank for it," Tenten says modestly, and Hinata winces, because she doesn't need to hear about her cousin in such detail. If only Neji knew she was talking about their sex life so explicitly. "So, girls, are you interested in buying any of these toys?"

Ino is the first of them to move foward, and Tenten begins to plot ways to restrain a certain Hyuuga Neji with her fluffy handcuffs.

* * *

_Neji in fluffy handcuffs?! ;)_


	9. The Stories We Write

_Happy Monday everyone! Just wanted to share this - written in response to a Tumblr request. This was actually more painful to write than Like the Sun Faces the Moon (oneshot, the third part to the Obon series, if you haven't seen it yet). Both stories took me a while to get over though. :o_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

_**The Stories We Write**_

**i.**

The war begins in the shadow of a thousand hurried goodbyes, in the days following a flurry of desperate physical connections, forged on the belief that many will not live to see the dawn of a new beginning.

Team Gai shares a last dinner on the evening before they are due to set off with their separate divisions; that night, as Lee and Gai wave goodbye from the end of the street, Tenten turns to Neji, meeting his gaze with a solemn determination that isn't new to him.

The words that leave her lips, however, are ones that he's never expected to hear from her, but war is upon them, and Neji finds that he isn't surprised by much anymore.

_I want you to see me as I am,_ she tells him, _just this once, before it begins._

Tenten is braver than even him, for suggesting what he has never dared to.

In her apartment that night, silvery moonlight dances across her bare skin as she slips out of her clothes, and Neji does not look away.

**I.**

The war tears through countless lives like a hurricane sweeps villages out of existence. Tenten counts her blessings at the end of every day that she doesn't receive bad news about her team - her family.

And she continues to fight, to deplete her energy and weapons, until the day Neji leaves her behind, and then some.

_My only regret is that there wasn't more to us before this,_ he told her that night. Tenten will never forget the way the moonlight glinted in his eyes, beautiful depths of lilac that have always chained him to the beliefs of his clan.

She doesn't cry when he slips away from the mortal world, between her fingers.

**II. **

A month after the war begins, it ends, and Tenten is so relieved at the sight of Neji and Gai and Lee in her dream that it feels as if a part of her has been ripped out all over again when she finds herself back on the battlefield, Gai almost burnt to a crisp, and Neji - her heart - lost somewhere far behind, buried in the rubble.

Tenten wears the faded touch of his lips on her forehead like a war scar, except it hurts deep in her chest instead, and she covers it up with her forehead protector, a momento so important that she hides it from the rest of the world.

The reality of his departure doesn't quite sink in - she lives in a daze - and Tenten feels herself falling ill for it, two weeks after the war ends.

Lee finds her by a clump of bushes one day, clutching at her belly, the contents of her stomach emptied in a gory mess on the ground. He drags her to Sakura, and she doesn't protest.

There is a long, uncomfortable silence while she waits in the makeshift hospital room, with Lee by her side, holding her hand. The green glow eventually fades from Sakura's palms; Lee looks anxiously to her for a prognosis, but Sakura holds only Tenten in her gaze.

Tenten learns that she is pregnant in a hospital full of crying babies and rushed, low voices.

She finds that she cannot breathe, that there is moisture on her cheeks but she doesn't remember crying.

The news tears a new gash in her chest; she draws a deep, shuddering breath. Lee pulls her into a big, bone-crushing hug and all she can think about is Neji, Neji, Neji-

The way his gaze smoothed over her newly-bare form (the first thing he did after that was to press his lips to hers)-

The heat of his breath in her ear as he leaned close to her-

Lee is sobbing hard; Tenten holds a tentative hand to her belly, and the caged, buried emotions rip from her gut like a storm unleashed.

Sakura leaves them to their grief in the privacy of the room, but all Tenten thinks about is how Neji has left part of himself behind, and how he's abandoned her - and their child - to fate.

**III.**

Lee and Gai visit her makeshift quarters a few days later, in the midst of her bargaining with Neji's ghost, who never seems to answer her.

It is only then that Tenten realizes her life is no longer only hers - it is hers, the child's and Neji's, rolled into one.

She pulls her remaining teammates into a tight hug, pronounces them the godfathers of her unborn child - the part of Neji that is still alive.

She will be brave.

**ii.**

_You never cease to amaze me,_ he tells her quietly, in the shadows of her apartment.

_By stripping?_ she laughs, pulls away the ribbons that hold her twin buns together.

Neji is silent for a moment, when the curls of her hair fall onto her bare shoulders, brushing her clavicles. He takes his time lifting his eyes to hers, and her breath catches when she reads the intensity in them.

_By doing what I don't dare to,_ he whispers. His fingers are warm as he reaches up, tangling them in her hair. She leans into his palm, smiles at him.

_You're brave in your own way, Neji,_ she tells him, with a tiny smile. _But I'm sure you know that._

_I want to know more of you,_ is his reply, and Tenten inhales sharply when he presses his lips to her throat.

They write the story of him and her that night, with the moon as their witness.

* * *

_Probably not continuing this - I don't do kids. ;)_


	10. A little bird said

_Will be going on a week-long trip overseas late next week... so there might not be updates then - it'll depend on whether I feel like posting ;) ;)_

_Anyway, have the sequel to "That was just a spar!" ;) Inspired by those who wanted to see more of Hanabi teasing Neji. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**A Little Bird Said**

"Thank you for sparring with me today, Neji-_nii_," Hinata murmurs, her gaze lowered, over a cup of green tea.

They are seated on the wooden boardwalk edging the buildings belonging to the main house, taking shelter from the intense midday sun. It has been a long morning of sparring, as well as helping Hinata with her new technique, and Neji is quietly glad that his cousin has been showing marked signs of improvement in her abilities.

"It's not a problem," he acknowledges, sipping from his own cup of tea.

"If I may ask... Why are you doing this for me?" Hinata queries, after a long moment of silence. Neji has never really explained his gradual inclination towards participating in clan matters, ever since Hiashi revealed the truth about his father years ago, and Neji apologized to Hinata for his cruel remarks.

Neji leans back slightly, and contemplates the sky. There aren't any birds flying overhead. "I would like to make amends for how I treated you in the past, Hinata-_sama_. Besides, Naruto will need a capable woman by his side when he becomes Hokage."

Never mind that guys-only dinner the other night - Neji hopes fervently that Naruto would have acquired some senses by the time the latter becomes leader of the village (he has no doubt that the blonde will achieve that goal), because he would rather not see Hinata suffer from heartbreak over the person she's been watching quietly for so many years.

Hinata blushes, lightly, and dips her chin further yet. "I will do my best," she vows.

"So, what're you going to do about the capable woman by _your _side, Neji-_nii_?" Hanabi interrupts, landing lightly on her feet in front of them. Neji blinks. He did not notice her presence - maybe she's got better at hiding herself, or maybe he was distracted by Hinata's question. Either way, Neji is disappointed in himself for having his attention slip.

"What capable woman?" he asks, cautious.

Hanabi lifts her eyebrows, and steps forward with a smirk. "You know... Tenten. Your teammate? The girl you've been hanging around with for about..." Hanabi counts off her fingers. "Six years, now?"

"There's nothing for me to do about her," he tells her, shortly. "She is a capable _shinobi_ in every right."

Hanabi rolls her eyes, and Hinata inches away, sensing the discord her sister is about to sow. "That's not what I meant, Neji," Hanabi replies with a grin.

The pieces click into place in his mind, and Neji is getting to his feet and walking away before he knows it. Whatever his younger cousin has in mind for this conversation, he isn't about to participate in it. "There is nothing to discuss, is there?"

"Oh yes, there is," Hanabi grins. "We know you like her."

Neji pauses.

"'_We_'?" he repeats, turning to give them a sidelong glance. Hanabi motions between Hinata and herself. He looks accusingly at Hinata, indignant, and Hinata flushes, pressing her fingers together.

"Y-you are most aware of what you feel, Neji-_nii_," she stutters, embarrassed, and Neji loathes to admit that he's experiencing that same mortification, with his cousins bringing his romantic interests to light. First Naruto and Lee, and now this?

"None of this has anything to do with you," he tells them stiffly, looking away. What he feels for Tenten is intangible - there are no words for it, only thick emotion. And Tenten needs to know none of it. Perhaps this is a phase he'll grow out of, but he doesn't think so. She's more important to him than he cares to admit.

"Oh, but it does," Hanabi says, tauntingly. She wags her finger at him. "We happen to have some... inside information."

Neji freezes, and fixes her with a stare from the corner of his eye. There isn't any point in denying his feelings towards Tenten before his cousins. "What inside information are you talking about?"

"Well..." Hanabi grins, and skips over to him. "A little bird told me that you'd like to sleep with Tenten."

He thinks he might explode right then. When Neji finally manages to get his anger beneath control, he asks, tightly, "And who might that little bird be?"

There are five people he's going to be hunting down tonight, to be skinned alive and roasted on a spit.

Hinata flushes and shrinks away, and Neji's attention anchors onto her. "Well?"

"I- I was speaking with Naruto-_kun_ yesterday," Hinata eventually reveals. "He- He wondered how Tenten-_san_ would react if she knew."

All the blood drains away from Neji's face then, because he can just see Naruto telling Tenten, and- Oh, heavens. Tenten would skewer him alive if she found out. He doesn't wait for a response from either of his cousins, merely spinning on his heel and leaping onto the rooftops, to locate Tenten at once.

"Oh, no," Hinata whispers, as they watch his retreating back. "I think he might be too late as it is."

* * *

_Neji... You should have known better than this. ;)_


	11. Herring Soba for the Uninitiated

_Written on the plane for _Hyperphonic_, who has been posting super-adorable domestic NejiTen fic. Go read if you haven't already. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Herring Soba for the Uninitiated**

Tenten discovers Neji's fondness of herring soba quite by accident.

They are thirteen and training for long hours each day, with little break between spars for lunches. (Breakfast is a light meal before they leave home, and dinner occurs only after they've broken from training each day.)

Each member of Team Gai brings his (or her) own bento - Neji's is prepared by the maids in the Hyuuga kitchen (typically sushi rice and some meat), while Lee's and Gai's are some concoction of green or other. Tenten experiments the most in the kitchen, resulting in bento meals that end up delicious, awful, or somewhere in between.

Today, she has an assortment of bowls - one each for cooked soba, soup, and pieces of herring that she got at a discount the day before. Neji looks warily at her as she lays the various bowls out, humming. (He remembers far too well the pumpkin _everything_ the week before - pumpkin cakes, fried pumpkin pieces, pumpkin tempura, pumpkin sushi... It had been enough to make him lose his appetite.)

"Want some, Neji?" Tenten splits the noodles into a couple of bowls (Lee and Gai are somewhere around the village) and tops them off with marinated slices of fish, ladling soup into each bowl at the end. "I made some extra for you."

He looks warily at the noodles, which are lukewarm and don't have a distinctive scent to hint at their edibility. Tenten tries the food first (as she often does, when Lee isn't around to be the voluntary guinea pig). The look on her face is one of delight; with no less hesitation, Neji reaches for his bowl, picking a couple strands of noodles up together with a small piece of fish.

It is surprisingly good.

So good, in fact, that he's finished his bowl even before Tenten's eaten half of hers.

He ends up trading his bento for the remnants of her herring soba.

Tenten grins the widest he's ever seen, and she's back the next day with more herring soba yet. (He barely refrains from stuffing his face like the ravenous homeless his uncle frowns upon.)

(Neji almost falls into a food-induced coma after.)

When Tenten offers to teach him to cook his beloved herring soba a couple of weeks later, he readily accepts (though he puts his foot down at having to wear a fluorescent pink apron during her lessons).

* * *

_Yes, Neji and his herring soba. ;) might update f/2.8 sometime soon. ;)_


	12. A million times awkward

_This has been a long time coming - it's the sequel to That was just a spar! and A little bird said. ;) Also, have a new poll on my profile page!_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**A Million Times Awkward**

"What did you just say?" Tenten all but yells at Naruto, and pins him to a tree with several _kunai_, including one uncomfortably close to his groin.

Naruto gulps. Perhaps this wasn't such a great idea, after all. He shouts back at her, "Hey! Hey! Cut it out! I swear that was what Neji told us!"

Tenten narrows her eyes, and approaches him with a short sword, its blade glinting dangerously. "Repeat what he said."

"H-He said, '_I will marry Tenten, I will bed Tenten, and I will kill every single one of you if she gets wind of this,_'" the blonde echoes nervously, eyeing the weapons that hold him to the tree. "I swear that's the truth!"

She surveys him quietly, hazel eyes glittering, and Naruto has time to fear for his life (a silent woman is a lethal one). The expression on Tenten's face molds into one of decisiveness; she approaches him, pulling her knives free. He slides down the tree, rough bark catching at his clothes, and stares warily at all the weapons she now has on her.

"Find Neji and tell him to meet me here," Tenten orders, waving a _kunai_ at him.

Naruto swallows hard, and hightails it out of there. He'll have to find a way to hide from Neji's fury (because there is no doubt that he's just got Bushy Brows and the rest into _huge trouble_) - but first, he needs to locate the Hyuuga prodigy.

At least he isn't the one having to face off with Tenten, though.

* * *

Neji near collides with Naruto, who is hurtling away from Team Gai's training grounds at full speed. He spins on his ankle and twists away, grabbing the blonde by his collar. "What have you told Tenten?" he growls.

Naruto has the decency to look sheepish. "I, um, I told her that you're interested in her?"

He glares, and tightens his grip on Naruto's clothes, until the latter further reveals, "She wants to see you at the training grounds, Neji!"

There is a sinking feeling at the pit of his stomach. "Don't tell me you told her what I said the other night, during dinner."

Naruto squirms, blue eyes looking at everywhere but him. "Uhh, maybe I did."

Neji rides the wave of anger that surges in his chest, and flings Naruto aside. Trust him to leak the one secret of his that Tenten absolutely cannot know. "I'll be back for you later," he snarls, fixing Naruto with a glare, and the blonde tenses in fright.

But there is nothing he can do now, short of turning back time, so Neji settles for the next best alternative - damage control.

* * *

"What the hell were you thinking?" Tenten screeches, and metal rains down on him the second he steps onto their training grounds.

On instinct, Neji spins into his _kaiten_, to deflect her projectiles, though it is long minutes before she stops and allows him a breather. Neji straightens, and looks for her, cringing inwardly when she stalks towards him, chain and sickle in her hands.

"I can explain," he volunteers.

"Of all things - you had to tell everyone but me that you wanted to sleep with me? What kind of man are you?" Tenten yells, red in the face, holding her weapon threateningly between them. "To top it off, how could you just announce that you'll be marrying me? I wasn't even consulted in the first place! I thought you had more sense than that, you presumptuous jerk!"

Neji stills, feeling a million times more awkward than he has in his entire life. Maybe he can _kaiten_ a hole in the ground and bury himself there.

No, Hyuuga don't hide.

Tenten is three feet away from him, and coming closer yet. Neji briefly wonders if he should back away, because he's in no position to defend himself from her strikes, really - he deserves every single one of them (and he will pass them forward to Naruto with ten times their intensity).

"Tenten!" he begins, a little nervous. (Vaguely, Neji acknowledges that the fire in her eyes is very attractive, that he is proud of how fierce and dangerous she is. Just when it isn't all directed towards him at once.)

"Have more chauvinistic statements to make, do you?" she snaps, glaring at him. Her fingers tighten around the handle of her sickle. "To think I trusted you to be the gentleman I thought you were-"

"It was a game - I was coerced into it!" Neji retorts with a frown. "I would not have said anything otherwise!"

"But you'll think it anyway?" Tenten pauses a step away from him, hazel eyes boring into his, rage rolling off her form in waves. Neji gulps. "You view me as a sex object?"

He pales. "No, that was not what I meant-"

"What did you mean, then?" Tenten growls, tapping the blunt edge of the sickle into his chest, pressing her face close to his. "I thought you, of all people, would be able to keep it in your pants-"

Intense heat washes over his face. "I am very capable of doing that," Neji sputters. "Not once have I made any advances on you-"

-Save for the time he tried to kiss her-

-Or the time her clothed bottom bumped into his thigh when she was bent over and he looked a little longer than he should have-

-Or the one time, just once, he caved and peeked at her bare chest in the women's baths-

Tenten calms down then, and surveys him shrewdly, her cheeks still flushed. And in a lower tone, she asks the one question he dreads more than any other, "Do you really find me attractive, Hyuuga Neji?"

Neji swallows. That is a double-edged sword, prepared to slice him to shreds whichever answer he might give. Unfortunately, the Byakugan doesn't allow him to read her mind, and he wishes he knew what she thinks of him. He parts his lips, and swallows again. He can't lie, not to her.

"I find you attractive," he admits, and turns away quickly, to leave the clearing. Neji would much rather endure a hundred spars, back-to-back, than witness Tenten judging him for his interest. He doesn't want it to change the dynamics between them.

The sickle plants itself right where he's about to step, and Neji stills, looking carefully back at Tenten. Her eyes are blazing, and she's stalking over to him, grabbing him by the the front of his robes. "You're not attracted enough that you can't keep it in your pants," she mutters, looking accusingly at him.

What in hell is he supposed to say to that?

"I have a great amount of self-control," Neji finally answers, looking sourly at her. "And I do not wish to ruin our relationship as friends."

"I want to see how attracted you are to me," Tenten tells him, with all the solemnity in the world, and Neji feels his mouth go dry.

"What do you mean?" he asks, even when he has a little inkling of what she's angling for. The thought of her body against his entices from the edges of his imagination.

"You know what I mean," Tenten says, her eyes narrowed, "If you're any bit of a man, Neji, you'll have an idea."

He stares at her for a long moment, barely breathing. "This isn't a proper conversation for us to be having, Tenten."

"Why? Because we're teammates, and that's all we are?" she challenges, her eyes glinting. "I swear that this isn't going to change things between me and you."

Neji remains studying her for a while - the promise of tasting her, feeling her, is a little too much to bear - and he steps forward, catching her chin and slanting his lips over hers.

* * *

They end up a little ways beyond the grassy edge of the training grounds some time later, Neji on his back, Tenten grinding shamelessly against the hard length in his pants, and it is all he can do to keep himself from moaning. He's grabbing at her thigh, thrusting at her, and her breast feels exquisite against the palm he's slid up her shirt-

He thumbs a pebbled nipple; Tenten gasps against his lips, reaching down and fumbling with the ties of his trousers. Neji tenses when she wraps a hand around him, tugging at him - he isn't thinking anymore, only feeling (and at this rate, nothing is going to be remaining in his pants)-

"Gai-_sensei_! I'm so excited about the new technique you'll be teaching me!" Lee crows loudly, somewhere behind Neji's favorite oak.

They break apart in horror. Tenten snatches her hands away from Neji, and they're on their feet in seconds, straightening their clothes and wiping at their lips. (Neji notices that there's a little bruise starting to form at the base of her throat.)

"It's a pity that Neji and Tenten aren't here, but I'm sure that they'll be excited to learn-"

He signals for her to leave, and Tenten nods, her eyes still wide with shock. Naruto's beating will come later - much later - but for now, Neji is quite content to follow Tenten back to her apartment, to finish what they've started.

* * *

_I don't know how they keep ending up in situations like that, but okay ;)_


	13. Oh, Life

_Inspired by a forum post on the internet about after-sex hair. ;) This also reminds me a lot of Hyperphonic's haircut vignette - read it if you haven't. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Oh, Life.**

It's one of those days in which Tsunade is in a foul mood, exacerbated by the lack of _shinobi_ for jobs, and her precious bottles of _sake_ being locked up in a glass cabinet by one well-meaning Shizune.

Sakura hurries out of the Hokage tower, in search of the _shinobi_ Tsunade has ordered for this specific mission.

It is a well-known fact that Team Gai always trains at Training Grounds Three, where most people hesitate to enter, at the risk of being pummeled by a hole-digging _kaiten_ or impaled by a horde of weapons. The grounds are unnaturally quiet today though, despite a couple of members of Team Gai being on their days off, and Sakura ventures towards those training grounds tentatively, reluctant to be caught in the midst of a stand-off.

What she does hear gives her some (a lot of) pause.

"We're never doing that again," Neji's low baritone resounds in the woods. "My hair always gets hopelessly tangled. And it's worse today, with _dirt_ in it."

Sakura frowns at the imagery, and stops walking, all the better to assess the situation.

"Well, I've _told_ you to put it up in a braid, but you refused," comes Tenten's reply.

"It's full of dirt now," Neji tells her accusingly.

"If you didn't enjoy being under me so much-"

"You make me sound feminine," Neji snaps.

Sakura flushes, frozen to her spot in the forest. Surely she isn't supposed to listen in on this conversation in particular. Neji likes being-?

"As I was saying," Tenten continues, ignoring Neji, "You were the one to come feel me up first-"

"I was not!" Neji exhales indignantly. "You were all hands, surely you could've _not_ tossed my robes away and laid it on the ground so my hair-"

"Oh _shut up_ about your hair, Neji!"

"Are you untangling it, or not?"

A short pause. They're sleeping together? Sakura winces at the images filling her mind, and doesn't quite dare step onto the training grounds, for fear that Neji and Tenten are not quite as clothed as she hopes they are.

"I... can't seem to work through all the soil in here," Tenten mutters. "Some of it might have to be cut off."

Another pause.

"We're never doing this on the training grounds again," Neji grumbles.

"Well, if you put your hair up in buns like I do-"

"And your hair fares that much better?" Arrogantly, enviously.

"Try it," Tenten challenges. "I'll even let you be on top this time."

Sakura grimaces. Surely not right now-

"Right now?" Neji asks, the one question Sakura dreads. If she doesn't stop them immediately, Tsunade is going to throw one hell of a fit, and Sakura is going to be the one getting in trouble-

"Guys!" she shouts, bursting onto the training grounds, before Neji and Tenten can do anything worse. It is with sheer relief that she discovers them clothed, albeit with dusty outfits. There's an ugly, soil-covered carpet of hair on the back of Neji's head. "Um, sorry to interrupt-"

Neji's renowned Hyuuga glare is scorching giant holes into her. Her cheeks burn.

"Well, um, Tsunade-_sama_ requires both of you to report immediately for a mission," she explains.

Neji angles a sour glance at his teammate. "I can't go in this state."

Tenten sighs. "Come on, I'll trim that mess off," she assures him. To Sakura, she smiles apologetically, and waves with a kunai. "We'll be there soon enough, sorry about that."

"Thanks." Sakura nods and heads back out of the training grounds, wondering what kind of crazy technique Tenten is using, for Neji's seemingly knot-resistant hair to be ground into such a mess.

Then again, maybe she really does not want to know. Sakura shudders, and continues on her way.

* * *

_A/N: Neji and Tenten sure crack me up a lot ;)_


	14. Gardening

_The husband bought bok choy seeds for us for Christmas. Hence, this was born. ;) Written on Christmas night._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Gardening**

"Here. Merry Christmas." Like the way he is prone to act in his everyday circumstances, Neji's gesture is direct; he holds the discreetly-wrapped gift out to her, with just enough distance between them that they aren't too close, but it doesn't feel as if they're new teammates, either.

"Thanks." Tenten beams at him, receiving the gift with delight. The box is strangely lightweight - it isn't a weapon, she immediately deduces, and her expression falters slightly, to Neji's concern.

"I was hoping you'd like it," he explains, uncertainly.

"What is it?" Tenten looks between him and the box, her forehead furrowed. What could he possibly think she'd like, that isn't sharp and metallic? It sounds like little beads when she shakes the gift.

"Open it," he says plainly, so Tenten does.

It's a packet of vegetable seeds, she discovers. Spinach. Tenten licks her lips, blinks a couple of times, and looks up at him. "Neji, I don't have a garden," she informs him awkwardly. He knows that, right?

It appears as if Neji's expected her response, because he shrugs and replies, "I'll get you some pots and soil in early spring."

"Do you even do gardening?" The frown on her forehead deepens. "I don't want to kill these plants."

(It feels as if there are enough seeds in the packet to try at least ten times, though.)

"No," he replies, looking a little uncomfortable. "But I saw the seeds and they... reminded me of your-" (he swallows) "-youthfulness."

Tenten bursts out laughing and forgives him immediately. "All right, but you'll have to promise to help me with them when spring arrives."

Neji gives her a solemn nod.

* * *

"It says here to plant them in early spring," Tenten informs him a few weeks later, while he's visiting her apartment between missions. She's scrutinizing the instructions on the seed packet again.

"I'll get you the soil and pots."

"It's like raising children, isn't it?" Tenten glances at him and beams, and Neji looks away, his cheeks faintly pink. She hides a smile.

He leaves her apartment, and returns soon after with a rectangular planter, and a bag of soil.

"Have you planted anything in your life?" Tenten asks, scrutinizing her best friend.

"No."

(She didn't think so.)

Neji reads the instructions on the seed packet himself, and sets the pot on her kitchen window, that faces east.

"Well, I asked Ino, and she said to pack the soil loosely, and water after we plant the seeds," Tenten recalls, placing fingers on his wrist to help direct the soil into the planter.

She puts just one seed into each hole they've dug - six seeds in total, for the two-foot planter. There should be enough for ten rounds of this, at least. With _senbon_, she punches holes into a plastic cup, and waters the seeds with that.

"I hope they'll sprout soon," she muses.

"Plants grow best when you aren't breathing constantly over them," Neji replies, and Tenten looks suspiciously at him.

"How did you know that?" she questions.

It's Neji's turn to answer, with a smirk, "I've done my research."

Tenten nudges him playfully in the side. "You're sure invested in these seeds."

He looks away, and doesn't reply for moments. "I don't want to see them go to waste."

* * *

All six seeds have sprouted when Tenten brings Neji back to her apartment. She ushers him to the kitchen, shows him the seedlings with some measure of pride. "They've sprouted!"

"So I see," he replies dryly, and his smirk doesn't fall away when Tenten elbows him.

"But the reason I asked you here is because I'll be away on a mission for three weeks. Water them for me when the soil feels dry, won't you?" She presses her apartment key into his palm, the metal warm from being so close to her body.

He wraps his fingers around the trust she's placing in him. "Sure."

* * *

There are five beautiful, growing plants and one riddled with holes by the time she returns.

"There was a caterpillar," Neji explains apologetically, when he extends the key back to her; Tenten closes his fingers on the key and smiles.

"Keep the key - I might need your help with the plants again," she tells him. "Don't let any more caterpillars in, though."

Neji raises an eyebrow at that, but doesn't question her decision. He slips the key back into his pocket, so it clinks with his key to the Hyuuga compounds.

* * *

Tenten returns from a mission that's dragged past its expected completion date, to find Neji in her kitchen, cooking some herring _soba_. He looks up at her when she slips into the kitchen, nose lifted in search of the tempting scent.

"Smells good," she tells him, a smile playing on her lips. "I didn't know you could cook."

"There are things you don't know about me," he informs her, almost primly, turning back to the pot on her stove.

"Oh? Like what?" Tenten nudges him, and leans in, pressing her nose to his shoulder. Neji stiffens. "You smell like herring soba."

"Really." He returns his stare to the broth.

The spinach plants are reaching maturity - she's plucked the caterpillar-damaged leaves off the one plant, and all six are doing beautifully now, under Neji's expert care.

Tenten presses a finger into the soil, determines that they're in need of water, and dispenses some into the planter. "You'd make a good husband," she comments.

Neji's ebony eyebrows make their way up his forehead. He slants a look at her, and pulls a couple of bowls out, dispensing noodles, soup and fish. "What makes you say that?"

"Because. You cook. You grow plants. You clean." Tenten looks into the sink, and finds no dirty dishes.

"You make me sound like a servant," he mutters, but sets the bowls on her kitchen table anyway, complete with chopsticks. The portions are a little smaller than what he usually eats - he wasn't expecting her to be back.

"I didn't mean to suggest that. How long have you been living in my apartment?" Tenten seats herself across from him, tucking into the soup. "Mm, this is good."

He chews on the noodles for the longest time. "A week."

She looks up at him in surprise. "Since the day I was due back?"

Neji shrugs awkwardly. "I figured I'd keep watch on the spinach. They'll get bitter soon after maturing."

Tenten grins then, slyly. "You like living here, don't you?"

He meets her gaze for a heartbeat, then looks away. "It's... more liberating than living at the compounds."

"Are you going to stay tonight, then?" She holds her breath, and looks at the spinach instead, tall green stalks testament to the care they've both given the plants.

"It's not proper." Neji finishes his noodles, and rinses his bowl at the sink.

"You like it here, though. Afraid that I'd be a bad housemate?" Tenten slurps the rest of her noodles, and joins him at the sink, rinsing her bowl when he's done.

"It's not that," he mumbles. "Like I said, it's not proper for us to... share a living space."

"But we've known each other for, what? Eight years?" Tenten sets her bowl next to his, drying her hands off on a hand towel. "If you feel more comfortable here than at the compounds, why not?"

"Because we're-" Neji pauses, turning to look at her, his eyebrows drawn together.

"Because we're not like this?" Tenten smiles, and steps in close, brushing her lips over his. Neji tenses, but does not back away. "I'd appreciate having you keep an eye on the spinach," she breathes. Her heart thuds loudly in her chest, almost as thunderous as his is. "Have you been sleeping in my bed?"

Neji hesitates, exhales shallowly against her skin. "Yes."

Tenten blushes at that, but maintains her proximity. "I don't mind sharing," she whispers. "Do you?"

"No," he answers, honestly, and finds her hips with his hands, pulling her towards him.

She kisses him again, in front of the plants, and the kitchen window, with moonlight streaming through, and thinks that this is the best Christmas present he's given her yet.

* * *

_A/N: Awwww ;) ;)_


	15. BYOB

_It felt fitting to post this, close after New Year's ;) Inspired by a friend's FB post on a BYOB party. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**BYOB**

"Neji! Tenten! Guess what?" Lee sprints onto Team Gai's training grounds, where his two teammates have been sparring for the better part of the morning, with hardly a break between each fight. "I bumped into Ino, and she gave us this invitation-"

"Save it for later, Lee!" Tenten yells, as she releases a wave of _kunai_ at Neji, who spins into his absolute defense once more. "Can't you see we're training?"

"But this is extremely important!" Lee shouts back, waving a pink card around. "It's about tonight, and I told her we could all go!"

"What?" Tenten flings herself towards Lee, away from Neji, skidding to a stop on her slippers. A cloud of dust trails after her. "What the hell did you just do?"

Their spar having been forced to a stop, Neji ends his kaiten and strides towards where Lee is hopping, a scowl pulling at his lips. "Couldn't you have saved it for later, Lee?"

"But I was so excited about it!" Lee explains, handing the pink invite over to Tenten, who frowns over it.

"8pm at Ino's place? What's 'BYOB'?" Tenten glances up at Lee from the card, scratching at her sweaty hair. "It doesn't even say why she's having a party."

"I'm not going," Neji tells them immediately, arms folded across his chest.

"Well, she said it's the fifth anniversary of us having graduated from the academy," Lee recalls, looking thoughtfully up at the sky. "You can't not go, Neji, we're the Konoha Eleven!"

"Sixth anniversary for us, since we're a year ahead of them," Tenten amends.

"I'm not interested." Neji turns away, his desire to return to his training apparent. "Tenten."

"Wait- what's 'BYOB'?" she asks again, looking between Neji and Lee. "It sounds like fun, Neji, are you sure you don't want to go?"

"Well, Ino said- Ino said it meant..." Lee falters, scratching his chin. "I think she said it meant, 'Bring your own'..."

Tenten frowns in thought, rubbing her cheek with the same hand that still holds a _kunai_. "Bring your own... boys?"

"It's a word that starts with B!" Lee exclaims, enlightened. "Bring your own... books?"

Neji sends them a disbelieving stare.

Tenten shakes her head. "You don't bring books to a party. Boys, I can understand."

"This is a challenge," Lee continues, folding his arms. "If I don't solve this, I'll run three hundred laps around the village-"

"Bring your own... balloons?" Tenten guesses. "No, that can't be right."

"What about... bottles?" Lee pipes up, his features alight.

"Bottles of what?" Tenten frowns again. "Knowing Ino- Bring your own... boobs?"

Neji coughs and turns a dark shade of pink. She looks at him in surprise.

"Neji, do you think that might be it? Bring our own... boobs?" Tenten glances at his flushed cheeks, and looks down at her chest. "You guys don't have, well-"

"That's not it," the Hyuuga snaps, looking into the trees instead.

"But Tenten-" Lee gapes at her, as if he's stumbled upon an unmistakable truth, "Perhaps that was what Ino meant - she wants you to bring your youthful, flower-like-"

"Lee," Neji grits, pinching his nose. "That isn't what Ino meant."

Tenten glances at him. "How did you know?" And before he can answer, she's stepping towards him, nudging him playfully. "Are you sure you're not just feeling threatened by the sheer number of boobs that we could bring?"

Neji sends her a baleful, pale-eyed look, and tries his very best not to glance at her chest. "Yes."

"Because?" Tenten raises her eyebrows at him.

"Because that acronym is commonly used for 'Bring your own booze'," he explains, jaw clenched, looking at Lee instead. "Which is to say, neither of you are bringing any."

"Oh." Tenten blinks.

Lee looks at him with sudden, awestruck understanding. "I understand now, Neji! I must run three hundred-"

Tenten claps a hand onto Lee's face, to silence him. "That means we need to go, Neji. Lee can't touch a drop alcohol - you know that."

Neji sighs deeply. "I did not ask for this."

"Come on, at least dress up, it'll be fun if you let it!" she grins, looping her arm through his. "Plus, you'll get to see all the boobs you want there."

He sputters at that, Lee forgotten. "I did not say that-"

"But I bet you were thinking it," Tenten grins, elbowing him. "I can't imagine you don't have hormones, Neji."

Neji gulps and blinks, looking away, stumped for words.

"It'll be fun if we all go, wouldn't it?" Lee chirps excitedly, when Tenten's hand slips away from his face.

Tenten looks between Lee and Neji, and grins, affected by Lee's infectious enthusiasm. "Yeah, we should all go, shouldn't we? I'll even make it worth your while, Neji."

Neji yanks his thoughts desperately away from the gutter. "I guess I have little choice."

She smiles at him. "Essentially, yes."

Neji shuts his eyes, and prays fervently that he'll retain his sanity tonight.

(Tenten shows up in a soft, silky red dress for the party hours later, and Neji almost thinks he's seeing things under the influence of intoxication, though he realizes it's real from the way she slips her arm around his waist, and smiles up at him.

His concentration wavers, and Lee consumes a cocktail, much to the horror of everyone at the party after that.)

* * *

_A/N: Haha! Neji, you have hormones, don't you? ;)_


	16. Between Images

_Quick sketch thing, inspired by Tara Reid making the headlines with her nude selfies, and _KNO_'s _Subtext_. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Between Images**

"Look, we need to talk," Neji says tightly, looking solemnly at her, as he settles into the armchair across from hers.

"About?" Tenten replies, unconcerned, barely looking up from her phone. "If this is about my recent pictures on Instagram, save it."

"You can't do this to your career, or mine," he snaps, getting to his feet just moments after he's seated himself. Tenten watches as her publicist crosses the space between them in two strides, and plucks the phone out of her hands.

"Hey!" she protests, glaring up at him. "Return that!"

"You'll do well to listen to me." Neji locks the phone and pockets it, standing over her curled form in her armchair.

For lack of things to occupy her hands with, Tenten gulps, and forces herself to remain looking at him. Hyuuga Neji is no ordinary man - how he isn't a celebrity himself, she doesn't know, because he has all the regal features of one. Ink-black hair cascading silkily over his shoulders, high cheekbones, and pale lilac eyes so intense that it feels as if he can see right through her.

"You've lectured me enough times for me to know the drill," Tenten mutters. "Besides, I never upload them from my main account. You know that."

"These pictures are explicit. People are already starting to make the connection between your identity and this supposedly-secret side account of yours," he grits, eyes flashing.

"So? I've covered all the important parts that Instagram wants me to," she retorts, glaring back at him. "Just because you want to keep your clothes on doesn't mean I have to."

Neji takes a step back and pinches the bridge of his nose. "Not all of us want to see you naked, Tenten."

"That includes you, I assume," she snipes, bitter.

Because she's tired of him looking at her with those cool eyes, when they've kept her awake in bed on many a night, parched and restless, needing him closer, without his designer suits and starched shirts and stupid ties between them.

"What I desire isn't of concern," he tells her guardedly. "You're fortunate that I found that account before you slipped up."

"Before _I_ slipped up? What are you even doing on my computer, anyway?" Tenten feels her patience snap, and jumps to her feet, advancing on him. "This is my privacy you're invading-"

"Some privacy that is," Neji mutters, glancing down at the rest of her body. She flushes, knows exactly what he's talking about. "Why even post these pictures if you aren't going to identify yourself?"

Tenten rolls her eyes. "Because it gives me a kick. Happy?"

"Why would you even-" he begins, frowning at her in confusion.

"Because, unlike you, I like being appreciated. I want acknowledgement without having my name attached to this. Maybe if people didn't know who I am, they'd look at me differently," she rants, glowering at him.

"But you are attractive. The media outlets say that," Neji answers, uncomprehending.

She heaves a sigh. A big one. "And what do _you_ think?"

Neji pinches his nose again. "I think you don't have to worry about what others think."

Tenten covers her face with her hand, exasperated. "For a genius, you are so dumb, Neji."

"What are you saying?" he questions, forehead furrowed.

"Forget it. I just posted another picture before you oh-so-politely grabbed my phone out of my hands," Tenten snipes, throwing herself back into her armchair.

The look on Neji's face is one of mingled surprise and unease. Tenten watches as he retreats, pulling his own phone out for a look. A few swipes of his fingers later, Neji swallows, and his nostrils flare. He looks up at her.

"You can't do this," he says, glancing back towards his phone.

"So you're following me on a side account, huh?" she guesses. (She's searched through her followers, and hasn't seen any familiar usernames.) The latest picture isn't too explicit - just her curled-up figure, stark naked, half-hidden in the folds of her hotel bed this morning. _Wish you were here,_ is the caption to it.

"I wasn't aware that you had a love interest," he returns, without answering her question. The look in his eyes darkens.

Tenten glances towards the ceiling, at the chandelier that's sparkling prettily down at them. She folds her arms defensively across her chest. "What would you care about that?"

"It's... just going to mean more covering up, or making it public-"

"That's if the idiot even realizes that I'm here and waiting," Tenten bites, frustrated. She glares at him. "Seems that I can only force him to look at me by posting nude pictures of myself online!"

Neji blinks at her. He's quiet for a very long while.

"This isn't..." he begins, uncertainly.

"Look in my phone," Tenten challenges, jerking her chin towards the device in his pocket. "Password is 9874. You'll find all you need to know there."

He frowns, and pulls her phone from his pocket, putting his away at the same time. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yes." She gets to her feet, suddenly nervous. If he finds those pictures revolting, then she'd probably have to get herself a new publicist. It's all for the best, right? "I'll be in the bedroom if you finally decide to return my phone."

Tenten beats a hasty retreat into the plush room, and sprawls herself across the fluffy, white duvet covers. Some of those pictures and folders she's labelled on a whim, when she was particularly distracted. Things like, _There's space in here for you, HN,_ and _Kiss my lips please, N,_ and just _Neji, Neji, Neji._

Her face burns. Maybe leaving the suite entirely would be a better idea, now that he's seeing the full extent of how much, exactly, she's desired him. Heat pools between her thighs, at the thought of Neji looking at her intimately through those pictures; yet at the same time, she's afraid, of him finding her repulsive, of him already being interested in someone she isn't aware of.

She pulls the pillows over her head (not seeing him means this isn't real, right?) and draws deep, rhythmic breaths. Her heart beats loudly in her ribs.

"I wasn't expecting this," Neji's voice sounds from the direction of the door several minutes later.

Heat scorches her cheeks - _he knows, he knows_ \- and Tenten grips the pillows harder, wishing she could sink into the bed and disappear entirely from his view.

"Tenten," he says, closer this time.

She's breathing hard, shoulders tense, ready to spring and flee. "At least I haven't posted some of those," she tells him, the pillows muffling her voice. "I'm sorry you had to see that."

The pillows are being pulled away from her head; she clings hard to the very last one, that separates her from him, and Neji curls his fingers into her hand. Surprised, she drops the pillow, only to have him tug it away from her, exposing her flushed cheeks.

Neji's eyes are dark, but there's no sign of disgust on his countenance, just the remnants of shock, and a hint of wariness. "I've seen... the pictures," he says haltingly.

"And?" Tenten asks, cautious, scrambling to a sitting position. She swallows.

"I'm sorry I haven't noticed it before," Neji admits. Slowly, he seats himself on the edge of the bed. "I have been distracted by other things."

"Like?" Tenten watches him uncertainly, hazily noting that he hasn't let go of her hand yet.

"Like telling myself that I shouldn't contemplate entering a relationship with my employer," he tells her, tentatively giving her a half-smile.

Her breath catches. She blinks at him, several times. "Are you for real?" she breathes, and swallows hard. "Did you hit your head on something, Neji?"

"No," he whispers, and releases her hand, to cup her cheek in his palm.

Their first kiss is slow - they lean in and meet somewhere in the middle, hesitant. The second is a little bolder, and Tenten finds herself flat against the sheets by their third kiss, through a fog of desire, when Neji kisses down her jaw and licks at her throat, and she's tugging his shirt from his pants and splaying her hands across his chest.

"Is this what you really want?" Neji murmurs, pausing suddenly, lifting his head to look at her.

"This has been a long time in coming," she tells him, and winds her fingers through his hair, drawing him back for another kiss.

The rest passes in a blur - when she strips him naked and wraps her fingers around him, and he slips fingers between her legs, hissing at her slick moisture. It is only long after the frenzy of movement, when sweat glistens on their bodies, that Neji moves his face away from the crook of her neck.

"Are you going to take another picture now, then?" he asks, and Tenten hears the smile in his voice.

"Why not?" she asks, pulling her phone from where he's placed it on the bedside table. "Just make sure to cover the offensive bits."

"What with?" Neji presses his lips to her throat, and her breath catches.

"I never pegged you as a pervert, Hyuuga," Tenten mutters. He sends a mildly affronted glance back at her.

"I have my honor," he maintains. She rolls her eyes, holds her phone up above them both.

It's a good picture that she takes, the mess of limbs signifying the beginning of something deeper blossoming between them.

* * *

_A/N: Is it me, or are people frequenting the NejiTen page less these days? :P The second chapter of Nejiko has been posted, if you weren't aware of it. ;)_

_I hadn't actually written about nude selfies yet? (Aside from f/2.8, ISO 100 lol) Wow. Well, now you have it. ;)_


	17. Lacy Greens

_Another update... though this was originally posted on Tumblr, if you've seen it :P inspired by a pair of lacy green undies._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Lacy Greens**

It's one of those days when Gai has got it into his mind that they need to practice swimming - not just hold their breaths underwater, but actually swim, because what use will holding their breaths be if their enemy, like Kisame, has pounded them to the bottom of some impromptu lake?

Team Gai finds themselves at the largest lake Konoha has to offer - the waterfall pool at the Valley of the End, where the thunderous cascade sends a mist into the air, accompanied by a roar that can be heard for miles around.

Lee and Gai are the first to change out of their obnoxious green spandex (where 'change' really means 'strip', much to Neji's aggravation, when they do so with ludicrous whoops of joy). He ducks into the dense foliage some distance away from where Tenten has gone, and gets dressed in his plain black swimming trunks, keeping just the thin strips of bandage across his forehead.

Tenten is still not done by the time he is, so he waits around for her while Lee splashes into the shallow waters with Gai, absolutely refusing to join in their madness.

Neji is about to settle down to meditate (why is Tenten taking so _long_?) when she emerges from the trees, folded clothes in hand, wearing scraps of forest-green... lace?

He stares. He can't take his eyes off her.

"Tenten," he gapes, when she pads over to him, and sets her clothes next to his. Neji gulps and tries not to stare at the skin he can see through her bra, and the dark shadow through her panties. Surely his mind is playing tricks on him.

"If you have something to say about the green, shut it." Tenten looks at him challengingly. "These were on sale, all right?"

"It's not the green," he protests. But how on earth is he going to mention that he can see _through_ her clothes?

He decides that the best course of action is to not look at her at all (despite the vast urge compelling him to look, to devour her with his eyes).

"Ah, Tenten!" Gai shouts, when he notices her standing next to Neji. "You look so very, ah, youthful!"

Neji's eyelid twitches. Surely both Lee and Gai can tell that she isn't wearing a proper swimsuit. He steps in front of her, to defend her modesty.

"What are you doing, Neji?" Tenten huffs from behind him. "We're learning to swim, aren't we?"

He watches helplessly as she slips into the water after Lee and Gai, her hips swaying hypnotically. The waves splash on her skin and he's suddenly aware that the lace she's wearing is clinging to all her curves and he can see the cleft of her bottom-

Neji pinches the bridge of his nose, hard, and hopes that the migrating blood in his body changes its direction soon.

"Our first lesson is to learn the dog paddle!" Gai is saying. "Go to a part of the lake that's about chest-deep. Person A will paddle with arms and legs, while Person B will hold his arms just beneath Person A's torso, for additional support."

"Who will I be partnered with, Gai-_sensei_?" Lee asks, all bright-eyed.

"Why, I will personally supervise your learning, Lee!" the Green Beast exclaims. Lee cheers, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Neji doesn't know if he should be happy that they aren't going to see more of Tenten than they have already.

"So, um, which of us is going first?" Tenten turns to him, quirking an eyebrow. They make their way slowly to a part of the lake that's a safe distance away from Lee and Gai.

"This is a bad idea," he mutters, just loud enough that she can hear.

"Afraid you can't learn to swim?" she suggests, a glint in her deep brown eyes.

"I know how to swim," he bristles, narrowing his eyes at her. "Do you?"

"Of course I do. Well, I'll start first, since you're being sore about everything." Tenten grins, swims over to him with easy strokes. Neji freezes. Her fingers brush his chest first, then her arms, and the smooth skin of her side.

He thinks he might choke and sink if he weren't standing to begin with. Gulping, Neji takes half a step back, and stretches his arms way beneath her, so there's absolutely no chance of him accidentally touching where he shouldn't.

"You don't actually need this support, do you?" he questions with a frown.

Tenten grins. "No."

But she's paddling anyway, arms and legs moving beneath the water's surface, and Neji tries not to look at the bare skin of her back, with ripples of light flowing across her.

"Now, flip onto your back, and let's try floating," Gai yells. Neji tenses.

"I don't particularly like floating on my back," Tenten tells him, but she turns smoothly in the water anyway, and stills, tipping her head back. The position brings the swells of her chest closer to the water's surface-

_Don't look,_ Neji tells himself. _Don't you_ dare _look._

"What're you looking at?" Tenten asks, noticing his fixation on the stone sculptures next to the waterfall.

"The sculptures," he says, and glances down at her face. But the ripples of light, caused by waves, skim across her chest, and Neji looks - only to find that there are stiff peaks straining against the material of her bra.

_Crap._ He jerks his eyes back to her face, but it's too late; he can't take his mind off what she must look like beneath all that-

"Are you cold?" he asks tightly, praying to the stone statues to please suppress that fullness in his groin.

"A little." Tenten smiles up at him.

"Now, switch over!" Gai booms, and Neji winces inwardly. As long as he isn't facing her... "Let's do the floats first this time!"

_Oh, heavens._

"Can we skip this? I've had enough practice," he grates, and Tenten raises her eyebrows dubiously at him.

"I've had to do it, Neji, you can't possibly skip training like that. You know it," she tells him with a light frown, rolling onto her side and finding her footing on the lakebed. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing," he replies, then changes his mind and corrects himself, "I've got a stomachache."

The furrow on her forehead grows deeper. "Why didn't you say so earlier?"

She looks down between them anyway, at his stomach, as if she could immediately tell what ails him-

"You, um, have something in your trunks," she observes, tilting her head to get a better look.

Neji stills, horrified.

Her eyes are flying up to his in the next second, and he's turning away, weighing the benefits of swimming or walking away from her.

"Neji?" Tenten begins, hesitant.

"I have a stomachache," he repeats, face awash with heat, and decides that running on water, away from all of them, is really the best course of action until he gets his body under control.

So he does that, with a great splash of water and rivulets running down his limbs, though what he doesn't expect is for Tenten to pull herself out of the water, sprinting after him. "Neji! Wait up!"

He mutters a curse and cringes. Things can't get any more awkward than they are, can they?

Until Tenten pulls a flying tackle on him from behind, sending him crashing into shallow water - he allows her to push him past the water's surface, to minimize the impact of their fall.

They emerge from the surface seconds later, tangled and thoroughly soaked.

"That wasn't what I had in mind," he mutters, trying not to think about how Tenten's arms are looped loosely around his waist, and how her breasts are pressed wetly against his chest.

"Mmm," she purrs behind him, her face in his shoulder. "I knew this outfit was good for something."

"What?" he sputters. What is she talking about?

"You did like it, after all," she says, and Neji hears the smile in her voice, even as her fingers dance across his chest. "You don't really have a stomachache, do you?"

"I just-" He looks around, fumbles for something to defend himself with. Surely she's offended by his arousal-

Tenten presses her lips to his neck, and Neji forgets to breathe.

"Tenten," he croaks. Gulps when her fingers slip to his waistband.

"I have a better idea about training," she whispers, and his thoughts spiral deep into the gutter.

"What?" he breathes. Surely this isn't a proper conversation for them to be having-

"Follow me home," Tenten tells him, her lips trailing up his neck. "I'll tell you there."

He doesn't question her orders, not this time.

* * *

_A/N: Because flustered Neji is the most hilarious ever. ;) but lol most of the time, my fics have more to do with sex than fluff... :P_


	18. Philosophical

_Posting while I'm half-awake and still needing some NejiTen fluff ugh. Be still my heart. This was inspired by Silly (written by Just A Little Spark)._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Philosophical**

"I'm feeling philosophical today," Tenten announces, as they sit beneath Neji's favorite oak, each nursing a cup of green tea after lunch, to aid in digestion. Lee and Gai are off on another intense bout of training (walking on their fingertips, as if walking on their hands weren't enough).

Neji casts a sideways look at her, but does not reply - he knows that she will continue at her own pace.

"What do you think of pleasure?" she asks suddenly.

He watches her carefully; Tenten's pose has not changed. No tightening of muscles to signify tension, and no flicker in her expression to indicate a hidden interest of sorts. She is genuinely curious, perhaps naively so.

"What do you mean by 'pleasure'?" Neji questions in return, unwilling to delve too deeply into the subject. There is, after all, a fine line between an intellectual discussion and propriety here.

"All sorts. You know, emotional pleasure, physical pleasure." Tenten looks up at the sky and shrugs. "In a world so full of hatred and fighting, surely things that feel good would be welcome."

"Right," Neji answers hesitantly, wondering where she's going with this.

"I mean, I'm not saying that pleasure is a cure to revenge, or loss," Tenten continues. She sips from her cup, before propping her hands on her raised knees. "But if people preferred having sex to killing - the world would be a lot more peaceful, wouldn't it?"

"I don't think that was what they meant by 'Make love, not war,'" he mutters.

"But you see my point, don't you?" she grins. "Like if Danzo had a harem-"

"That is a disgusting notion." Neji frowns. He can't imagine anyone being interested in a wrinkled old man like that.

"Or if Orochimaru got laid," Tenten suggests, and Neji winces in response.

"I don't need such images in my head," he protests weakly.

"But I think what would be an important skill set to have, aside from killing," Tenten carries on, as if she didn't hear him, "Is the ability to give pleasure. Don't you think?"

At her expectant look, his forehead furrows. "How-"

Tenten interrupts him without waiting for a response. "Do you masturbate?"

The green tea that he's been tipping into his mouth exits in a spray, some of it dribbling down his chin. That is the ugliest word in his vocabulary. Neji flushes about ten shades of red before he thinks to respond. "What kind of question is that?" he sputters, wiping at his face.

Her eyebrows are raised, and she's staring at him, as if surprised. "It's just an ordinary question."

"That is no ordinary question!" he bristles, unwilling to meet her eyes. This topic has veered off the line she's been treading, and has gone straight into improper. "Things like that aren't discussed-"

"Even between me and you?" Tenten blinks innocently at him. "You haven't answered me, Neji."

"We don't-" _We don't have such a relationship,_ is what he wants to say, but does not. Instead, Neji skirts the issue. "We don't talk about things like that."

"Why not?" She frowns. "Yet killing someone comes second nature to us."

It's a good point. Neji pauses, uncertain. "It's not proper," he eventually answers.

"But ending a life is," Tenten returns. "Do you see what I mean?"

"If it's for the sake of the village," he yields, glancing at her. "Sex is... more personal than that."

"Well, I wasn't talking about sex yet," Tenten tells him dryly. "I was just wondering if you knew how to... you know, create pleasure."

He winces uncomfortably. This isn't the turn he imagined their conversation taking. Neji stares at the compact dirt they're sitting on, smoothed by years of use. Even admitting to the mindless grab-and-tug of that process is humiliating. Hyuuga don't talk about basal needs like that.

"Do you?" she asks after a while.

"Do you?" he probes in return, because he can't be the only one embarrassed like that. To Neji's bewilderment, Tenten grins.

"If you're having trouble answering a question, then it's probably a _yes_," she deduces.

He cycles through the ten shades of crimson again. From the corner of his eye, though, Neji notices that there is a slight tint of pink on Tenten's cheeks. He stares sullenly at her.

He can't bear to think that she might be imagining him engaging in that... unspeakable activity, so he directs the same question back at her. "Well, do you?"

She grins mischievously at him then. "Is it that important to you?"

Neji glowers at her. "You made me answer it," he accuses.

"I didn't make you answer it," Tenten objects, still smiling. "I merely figured it out from your responses. But you aren't denying it, so it must be true."

He swallows. Looks across their training grounds, away from her.

"But that just begs the next question, does it?" she muses. "What do you think of while doing it?"

The colors are back on his cheeks, and Neji wishes he were home. Or somewhere far away. Somewhere where she can't read him.

Because she surfaces in his mind every time he does the unspeakable.

"I need to return to the compounds," he tells her stiffly, rising to go.

"Is it Ino? Or Sakura?" Tenten asks simply, eyebrows raised. "Or... Hinata?"

Neji cringes. "How could you think so lowly of me?" he fumbles, looking accusingly at her.

Tenten looks at him in horror then. "It can't be... Tsunade-_sama_?"

He stares at her, speechless.

"Um, Kurenai-_sensei_?" she tries again. "Shizune? Ayame? Temari?"

Apparently Tenten's forgetting that she's a woman, herself.

Neji pinches the bridge of her nose. Decides to make a bold assumption. "Tell me who you think about when you pleasure yourself," he says, "And I'll tell you mine."

"Really?" Her gaze slides off him, and Tenten begins to look a little uneasy. Not a question she was expecting, then. And her answer is a _yes_.

Neji smirks. This, he can handle. He settles back down onto the ground, anchoring his gaze on her. "You're interested in someone," he states.

Tenten flushes a bright pink. He watches her, an uncomfortable mix of curiosity and dread filling his gut at the same time. Does she like him?

"You can't have begun this conversation without an ulterior motive," he realizes then, surprised by how well she's hidden her interest in the discussion. The easiest way to find out, for sure, is to test the theory he has, now that the focus is no longer on him.

She freezes the moment he leans in close to her, breathing lightly onto the crook of her shoulder. Tenten's chest rises and falls quicker now, but she doesn't move away.

"Who is it?" he whispers in her ear.

Tenten's cheeks are still flushed, and Neji entertains the idea that he's the one she imagines between her legs.

The thought is enough to give him pause, heady and exhilarating as it is.

"Neji," she squeaks, scrambling away from him, still refusing to meet his eyes.

"I think I know," he tells her, and she flicks a quick, uncertain glance at him, before looking in the other direction.

"This is awkward," she mumbles, and he reads in her the same desire to be elsewhere, far away.

"It could be Lee, or Kiba," Neji begins, watching her expression. "Or Shino, or Naruto."

The look on her face doesn't change.

"Or maybe even Kakashi, or Jiraiya, or Iruka," he continues. "But I think it's me."

Her entire frame tenses up then, and Neji can't help the surge of smugness in his chest. This is probably the same satisfaction she gets from seeing him flustered.

But more than anything else, he likes that he's the one she thinks about.

"You haven't said who you fantasize about yet," Tenten stutters, still unable to meet his eyes. "I'm not answering until you do."

"Who knows," Neji answers mildly, settling back against his tree. She was the one to bring all that discomfort upon him earlier, anyway.

Tenten turns to glare at him then. "You need to answer my question."

He shrugs, unfazed when she pulls a _kunai_ from somewhere and threatens him with it. "Why's it so important to you, anyway?" he asks.

"No reason," Tenten huffs, and finally stands, dusting the seat of her pants off. "Whatever. I'm going to resume training."

Neji allows himself a short moment to admire the sway of her hips before finally joining her, a smile tugging on his lips.

* * *

_A/N: Yes they both got the upper hand here and I love it. ;) Yay for awkward questions!_


	19. Yakiniku

_This is what should've happened in Shippuden 232... Because they should totally have continued the "talking about boys you like?" conversation. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Yakiniku**

Sizzles of grilling meat fill the newly-opened establishment; the aroma of caramelized pork and savory beef mingle tantalizingly, and sounds of conversation drift to every corner and along wooden hallways, where waitresses bustle through with plates of food.

"I'm so glad that we've finally got a _yakinik_u place to go to!" Tenten cheers, spreading thin slices of raw meat on the red-hot gridiron in the center of the table. "I mean, there's nothing like a barbecue place for our girls' night out, huh?"

"It's sure nice to have somewhere to eat and relax, isn't it?" Ino agrees, sipping from her cup of tea. "And Sakura here needs a break from all her rounds in the hospital. Thanks for suggesting this, Tenten!"

Ino nudges Sakura playfully in the side, and the latter grins. Next to Tenten, Hinata smiles warmly, glad to be basking in the company of her friends.

"We haven't done this in a while," Sakura admits, adding her own meat skewers to the grill.

No one mentions how Pein's attack had destroyed all the buildings in Konoha - that tends to kill the atmosphere at a gathering. Instead, Tenten raises her cup of tea in a toast. "To many more years of friendship ahead of us!"

"To many more years of friendship ahead of us," Ino, Sakura and Hinata echo, lifting their cups.

Raucous laughter sounds from the table across the aisle then, though none of the girls need a peek to identify their neighboring patrons.

"So I was telling that girl I met outside the bathhouse that the men's bath is full of good-looking guys," Kiba's voice drifts over. "'Course she believed me!"

Tenten exchanges glances with her companions. "Um," she hesitates. "I don't think we needed to hear that."

"You shouldn't be proud of that fact. Why? Because you were outside the bath, and therefore not included in the bathhouse of good-looking-"

"Oi, quit it, Shino!" Kiba growls.

Tenten winces, and Hinata ducks her head in embarrassment.

Ino grins. "You have to admit that they look pretty good," she whispers conspiratorially. "Especially in... the bathhouse."

Sakura chuckles, and Hinata stares at the blond in shock.

"S-surely you haven't s-seen..." Hinata stutters, blushing hard.

Ino's smile is almost entirely too innocent. "Who says I have?"

Tenten gives her a suspicious stare. Among all of them, Ino would be the first she'd suspect of misbehavior like that.

"Well, why don't we talk about something more interesting," Ino suggests, thanking the waitress that brings her a plate of offals. "Like... our guys."

Tenten frowns at that. "What do you mean by 'our guys'?" she asks cautiously, very aware that both her male teammates are sitting across the aisle, and are perfectly capable of hearing whatever they have to say.

Ino smirks. "Well, this is a girls' night out, isn't it? Surely we can talk about the guys we like."

Tenten gulps at the look Ino is sending her. Everyone knows that Hinata loves Naruto, and it's no secret that Sakura is still pining for Sasuke. Which leaves only her as Ino's target. "Surely there are better things to talk about than that," she protests.

"Really?" Ino returns with a grin. "Last I heard, you were going on a date with someone."

The table on the other side of the wooden divider has gone very silent.

_Crap_, Tenten thinks. That was just a dinner with Shikamaru to discuss a mission. Outwardly, she responds, "I haven't been on any dates."

She doesn't want Neji to hear any of it. Especially because he's the one she secretly has feelings for.

"Yes you have," Ino presses, her painted lips curving. "You seem to be pretty popular with the guys, Tenten."

"I am?" Tenten blurts, and immediately knows she's said the one thing she shouldn't.

Ino gives an eager nod, pouncing on the opening that Tenten has left. "You hang around Neji and Lee all the time. Plus, you've been seeing the guys on Team 8-"

"For a mission," Tenten tells her, grabbing her cup of tea and drinking from it to calm her nerves.

"And Team 10," Ino continues, as if she hasn't heard the interruption. "Surely there's someone you like among all these guys."

Tenten chokes on her tea.

"There isn't," she sputters, spilling tea onto the table as she sets her cup down. Hinata pats her on the back, and Ino shares a significant look with Sakura. "Surely you can ask Sakura or Hinata instead."

They're aware that neither Sasuke nor Naruto are in the village, and are therefore safe (and very boring) topics to talk about.

"I'll ask Sakura and Hinata in time," Ino grins, waving dismissively. "But since you're the oldest among us, I figured that you should go first."

Tenten glowers at her, flushing. She pulls her cooked meat off the grill, setting them in a pile on her plate. Sakura and Hinata follow suit; Ino flicks a casual eye at the offals that are still grilling and turns them over expertly with her tongs.

"I always thought it might be Neji, though," Ino says in a half-whisper, and Tenten stills, wondering if it can be heard across the aisle over the sizzling meat. "But I've seen you having lunch with Shikamaru pretty often these days."

"I told you, it was a mission," Tenten answers. Doesn't Ino know about Shikamaru's 'I'm too lazy for this' relationship with Temari? She firmly ignores the questioning look Hinata slides towards her (she and Lee visited the Hyuuga compounds often, before the village was destroyed, and Neji allowed her into his room on occasion).

"It isn't Lee, is it?" Ino suggests, and Tenten stiffens.

"We're all family, you know," Tenten says, laughing awkwardly. "Of course I like Team Gai!"

"You're our beloved flower, Tenten!" Lee shouts from across the room.

Tenten claps a hand across her face in exasperation.

"Don't dodge the question," Ino tells her loudly.

Sakura is staring expectantly at her, and Hinata winces. "D-don't force Tenten-_san_ to answer, Ino-_san_," she stutters.

"Surely you're curious about her answer as well, aren't you, Hinata?" Ino says slyly, and Hinata falls silent, sending an apologetic look towards Tenten.

Tenten pulls a face. "Don't you girls have better things to talk about?"

She doesn't want to know what Neji's thinking about all this. He's probably eating his fish and enjoying the quiet at his table for once.

The easily-recognizable figures of Tsunade and Shizune appear at the doorway then, and Tenten glances at them, relieved at the momentary distraction. The rest of her table looks over as well, and Tenten watches as Tsunade's gaze falls upon them, her features lighting up in recognition.

"So," the Hokage slurs, walking over to the divider by their table. "Having a girls' night out?"

"Yeah," Ino answers, surprised that Tsunade would come over to make small talk with them.

"Well then, you won't mind if I join you, will you?" the older blond asks, settling herself next to Tenten and slinging her arm over Tenten's shoulders.

Shizune gives an apologetic bow. "Apologies for the interruption," she says, giving them an embarrassed smile.

Tenten smells the liquor on Tsunade's breath, and decides not to question it. Sprawled on her is, after all, the woman who can crumble rock with a single finger.

"So, what're you girls talking about?" Tsunade asks. "The boys you like?"

Tenten feels the pit of her stomach sink to her feet.

Ino looks meaningfully at Tenten, and answers, "We were, as a matter of fact!"

Tsunade gives a hearty laugh. "So, who likes who?"

The waitress comes by to collect Tsunade and Shizune's orders, and it looks as if they aren't going to be leaving anytime soon. Tenten cringes inwardly.

"Well, I was going to suggest we take turns to answer," Ino changes her tune, and Tenten has a moment to be relieved that the focus is no longer on her.

"So, who are the lucky guys?" Tsunade asks.

Tenten is vaguely aware that the guys are all blatantly looking over their divider, eavesdropping conveniently forgotten.

"Sasuke," Sakura is the first to admit, looking down at her plate. The temperature at the table drops by a few notches.

Tsunade nods, and looks over to Ino.

"I think that painter is pretty cute - Sai," she admits calmly, and Tenten feels a pang of irritation. Sai isn't at the next table, either.

"Hmm," Tsunade acknowledges, and Tenten's heart beats so quickly that she thinks it might jump out of her throat.

"Naruto," Hinata whispers, her face burning bright pink. It looks as if she's going to faint, and Tenten isn't inclined to be in her position.

"Naruto, huh." Tsunade pauses for a moment to smile. "Good choice, that."

Hinata flushes even more deeply, and Tsunade grins, before turning to look at Tenten.

Despite being an accomplished shinobi in her own right, Tenten still isn't able to help but feel as if she's a little underachieving next to the legendary sannin, who has her beat in looks, skills, and achievements.

"Um," Tenten fumbles. There's really no way she can lie to the Hokage. Tsunade raises elegantly-shaped eyebrows, and Tenten grimaces. At a loss, now, she cups her hand to Tsunade's ear and whispers, "He's sitting at the next table... I'd rather not say."

"Huh. I see." Tsunade's eyebrows crawl all the way up her forehead, and she glances towards the six guys crowded at the divider, all of whom are unabashedly staring. "Oh! Would you like to join us?" she says to them.

Tenten stiffens against the woman she once admired beyond all else. Is this really happening to her?

"That's too troublesome. I'd rather stay here," Shikamaru says, drifting back to his own seat.

"I want to put the grill to full use," Chouji agrees, settling back down at the table.

"We shouldn't interrupt you," Shino explains. "Why? Because it's our guys' night out-"

"I'll celebrate our youth from over here!" Lee exclaims brightly, waving a plate of raw meat at them. Tenten watches in horror as the meat slides off the plate, though Lee catches every single piece in midair with his quick reflexes.

"I shouldn't interrupt," Neji says evenly, though Tenten doesn't miss the way his eyes flicker towards her. He bows, and returns to his seat.

"Well, I guess I'm stuck here with the guys, then," Kiba concludes, giving them a wolfish smile. "Though I'd love to join you ladies any day, of course."

Tenten breathes a sigh of relief when the girls' table breaks into lighter conversation that doesn't involve guys, or whoever she likes. They drift into other topics, like beauty tips, and exercise regiments, and she is only too keen to oblige, glad that she isn't forced to reveal her secret.

At length, the group breaks for the night, at the same time the guys' table does, and they bid the Hokage and Shizune good night, before heading to their respective temporary lodgings.

Tenten isn't surprised when she feels a familiar presence fall into step beside her.

"You didn't answer the question," Neji begins, and she draws a sharp breath, glad that the shadowy night hides the flush on her cheeks.

"Which question?" Tenten dallies.

"You know which I'm referring to," he tells her knowingly, and she doesn't miss the way his eyes flick towards her. "You're interested in someone. Tsunade-_sama_ looked over at our table when you told her."

He really doesn't miss much, does he? The corners of her lips twitch. "Well, I gave her a vague answer," Tenten replies, looking straight ahead. The thought of telling him, or him finding out, makes her heart pound.

"You said that Team Gai is your family," Neji continues, lifting a dark eyebrow.

She pauses in the middle of the street and gapes at him. "You were eavesdropping!"

Neji gives her a prideful look. "I would if it concerns one of us."

"It's none of your business," she mutters, glancing away.

He isn't standing too far away, and Tenten looks sharply at him when he steps towards her.

"Will you tell me, then, if I asked?" Neji probes, and Tenten goggles at him, her heart slamming itself against her rib cage.

"I- I don't know," she stutters, freezing when he closes the distance between them. How much does he see, really, with those eyes of his?

It seems as if Neji has seen that question in her expression somehow, because he smirks, and drops a kiss on the tip of her nose.

Tenten stares.

He pulls away, and continues heading down the path. When there are ten paces between them, and she still hasn't moved, Neji looks back at her expectantly. "Are you going to be standing there all night?" he asks.

She glowers at him. "No."

He waits until she catches up with him, then begins walking again, a slight smile tugging on his lips.

"What was that about?" Tenten asks, a little suspicious.

"You could call it research," he answers vaguely, and she frowns at him, punching his arm.

"That's not an answer!" she informs him primly.

"You didn't give me an answer either." Neji looks pointedly at her.

Tenten smiles then, when they fall into silence and his fingers tangle with hers.

Maybe all Ino's interrogation hadn't been for nothing, after all.

* * *

_A/N: Hah Neji ;)_


	20. Hopes for the New Year

_Back from vacation... here's a short drabble. ;) Got a couple of new short ideas I'm working on :P_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Hopes for the New Year**

They're seated on the flat ground beneath Neji's favorite tree, sweating from the series of _taijutsu_ spars they've done that morning. Lunch is the usual - _bento_ sets prepared by Tenten, and Neji's favorite green tea, kept warm in a large metal thermos.

It's the last day of the year, and training carries on as it always does. Gai and Lee are out of the village on a mission, so it's just the two of them performing their yearly tradition today, while the other half of Team Gai does the same wherever they are. (The ceremony will repeat when the four of them are in one place again, though this will do for now.) Neji dispenses tea into two ceramic teacups, handing one to Tenten, before taking the remaining one for himself.

"The year went by quick, didn't it?" Tenten smiles, leaning back against the smooth bark of the tree.

"It did at some points, but was slower at others," Neji answers, sipping from his teacup. "What's your favorite part of this year?"

She tips her head back and contemplates for a bit. "Maybe the time Gai-_sensei_ treated us to staying at that inn with the hot springs."

Neji's lips thin at that memory. "You didn't have to sit in the spring with them."

Tenten laughs. "That's true. What about yours?"

"Mastering the Air Palm," Neji answers. "What are your hopes for the new year?"

"To become stronger, of course." She smiles at him. "Isn't that the motto of our team?"

"It is," he agrees, returning the smile. "It is also my hope that Hinata-_sama_ will be a step closer to earning the title of clan head as well."

So that she'll be able to open the cages binding the branch house members.

Tenten hopes that they'll see that day come sooner than later. "To a new year," she tells him, lifting her cup.

"To a new year," he responds, raising his cup to hers. "Although there's one thing that may be better than that."

Curious, she turns towards him, surveying his calm features from inches away. "Oh? What is it?"

Neji doesn't answer - instead, he leans in and brushes his lips across her cheek, inhaling against her skin. "Spending time with you," he whispers in her ear.

Tenten flushes a deep red, blinking rapidly. Did he just-

"I don't need an answer right away," Neji continues. He pulls away from her with a smile, looking into the distance. "Just sitting here is enough."

It takes her a moment to comprehend his words. "You're sure patient," she remarks in surprise, still embarrassed at what's just transpired.

Neji lifts an eyebrow at her, amused. "And you aren't?"

"I... never really expected you to..." Her heart flutters, and Tenten smiles to herself. "I mean..."

He tips his head back, content to enjoy her company. "I thought you knew me better than that, Tenten."

"I- Well, I didn't know what to think of it," she sputters, looking down at her teacup. "Sometimes it's better not to get one's hopes too high."

"What about now?" Neji asks, slanting a glance at her.

It doesn't hurt to believe in them for once, does it?

"I'll think about it," she tells him with a grin, leaning into his arm.

* * *

_A/N: This was inspired by Tacica's Newsong. So many new NejiTen fic updates recently omg!_


	21. The Sound of Ripping

_This... I don't know. It's inspired by _**Giada Luna**_'s_ Underneath It All_ (which you should totally read &amp; review because she is awesome)._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

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**The Sound of Ripping**

It's the kind of sound that no one likes to hear.

The unmistakable ripping of seams, of decent clothing coming apart in the most embarrassing of ways - that is the sound Hyuuga Neji finds himself encountering on this perfect spring day, just as he crouches down to pick a box of groceries up for a tiny old lady.

Lee's eyes are wide, and Tenten turns to stare at Neji in disbelief.

Neji, himself, freezes on the ground, perfectly aware that his current predicament is made a thousand times worse by a simple fact: that he has made the very erroneous decision of going without his underwear today.

Team Gai is doing its first D-rank mission in years, after all.

Several things came together to make this a reality - he'd woken up late, only to find that his entire underwear drawer had gone missing. And he had ten minutes to meet his teammates for their mission. Had he been drugged?

Now is really not the time to be thinking back, however - neither of his teammates have seen the rip in person, and Neji is hoping beyond belief that there isn't anyone behind him right now.

He straightens warily with the box in hand, heat rising to his cheeks.

"Ah, my house is just this way," the old lady warbles, oblivious to his predicament. She turns and begins heading down the street, away from the edge of the bustling marketplace.

Neji grits his teeth, wishing he could disappear this very moment. But he doesn't, and is grateful when his trousers loosen around his hips to hide his very naked behind. What will Hiashi say about this?

"I can carry that box, Neji!" Lee volunteers, slanting an obvious glance at Neji's hips. Tenten watches both of them, uncertain as to what she should say.

"I can manage this," Neji grits. "It's just a box."

"Do you have an extra set of clothes?" Tenten whispers, also glancing towards his butt. Neji glowers at her.

"We just need to get this box to her house," he mutters, torn. Should he palm the box off on Lee, and sprint home to change?

As if she's read his thoughts on escaping, their client turns back to him, giving him a toothless grin. "You're such a helpful young man, aren't you? Your folks sure brought you up well."

She catches his arm in a death grip then, and Neji stiffens, still acutely aware of the breeze against his bare skin.

Lee and Tenten seem to comprehend the gravity of the situation - they fall into step behind him, if only to help shield the rip in his pants from unsuspecting passers-by.

Neji is eternally grateful that the old lady is incapable of taking wide steps - the tear in his pants isn't forced to open, at least. Fabric brushes tauntingly against his skin. He wishes he were somewhere far away. Or that he'd told Lee to carry the box instead.

The delivery seems to go well, and Neji has time to think that maybe - just maybe - they'll be done in the next three minutes, and he'll be able to return home for a spare set of clothes.

When he makes to turn toward the ground-level apartments of a building, however, the old lady steers him away, instead showing him to the stairwell. "I live on the third floor," she tells him in resignation, "Can you imagine this poor old woman carrying her groceries all the way up these flights of stairs?"

Neji wants to sink into the ground at this very moment.

But he can't, because their client is already dragging him forward, and he's praying that Tenten and Lee have the decency to step away and spare him any more mortification.

The climb up the stairs is slow and painful, and Tenten makes a little sound, akin to a squeak, when Neji is three steps up the stairs.

He chances a look back; she's flushed a bright red, and Lee is gaping at the hole in his trousers.

Neji grips the box of groceries so hard that his knuckles turn white. He doesn't know what he can possibly say to his teammates after this. If he hasn't died from the damning feeling in the pit of his stomach. Just how bad is the tear, and how much of his behind is Tenten privy to?

(He isn't concerned about Lee - they've spent more time together in hot springs than Neji cares to put a name to.)

Tenten makes another squeak in the back of her throat - will she quit staring? - and Neji almost wishes he had the gall to meet her eyes and tell her to _Please look away_.

He clears his throat - Tenten finally seems to get the message. She jerks her head to the side, cheeks a rosy pink. Neji doesn't know what to make of her staring, so he continues the trudge up the stairs, followed by his teammates, who are only going to remain silent while they are still with the old lady.

At last - at long last - the lady fits her key into her door with shaky hands, and Neji waits for her to enter her home, before stiffly following her to the kitchen. He sets the groceries on the counter, and turns to leave.

"Won't you nice kids stay for some tea?" the old lady smiles, looking at Neji.

He imagines himself sitting down, pants tearing further yet, and blanches.

"We have to be going," Tenten tells their client with a bright smile. "The Hokage has another mission for us today!"

"But-" Lee protests, eyes wide, and Tenten cuts him off.

"I heard it had something to do with squirrels," Tenten informs all of them solemnly. It is enough to shut Lee up, and the old lady pouts.

"If you must," she warbles, looking almost-longingly at Neji.

Neji forces himself to give her a polite bow, and allows Tenten and Lee to fall into step behind him. He releases a huge breath when they're back in the stairwell of the apartment building, and out of earshot of their client.

"Neji! Is this a new form of training?" Lee blurts, looking surreptitiously at the rip in his pants.

Neji scowls at him, turning so his back is to the wall. "It's merely the result of a series of unfortunate circumstances. I have to return to the compounds for a while."

Tenten doesn't say anything; her eyes are bouncing between his face and his hips, and Neji winces at the thought of her glimpsing his fall from grace.

"We'll, uh, report to the Hokage first, then?" Tenten asks, though Neji can tell that she has a lot more to say than just that. "Or do you want us to accompany you back to the compounds?"

He pinches the bridge of his nose, breathing out slowly. There's less of a chance of him bumping into someone he'd rather avoid if he sends one of them ahead to scout the path back to the compounds.

"Lee," Neji begins, "Go ahead first. We'll be right behind."

"Yosh!" Lee cheers. "Anything to aid in your youthful return, Neji!" he crows.

Neji doesn't miss the way Lee glances warily at his pants again, and glowers at the green beast. "There's nothing to see here," he snaps.

Lee salutes, and leaps off the parapet wall, onto the roofs of the nearby buildings.

Tenten learns and does not ogle him like Lee did. She does flush slightly, however, and begins moving as soon as Neji makes to jump onto the nearest roof.

"Um, sorry about that, Neji," she says quietly, as they're leaping from one roof to the next.

He frowns. "For staring?"

The red tint on her cheeks deepens. "No, not that... Lee and I- we were... training."

Neji decides that he doesn't like where this is going. "What kind of training?" he asks carefully. "This doesn't have to do with my missing clothes, does it?"

Tenten is absolutely not looking at him now. "It... does, actually."

"Tenten." Neji stares at her, coming to an abrupt halt on a roof. "You... stole my clothes?"

She cringes. "Well... It was a bet I did with Lee. We wanted to see if we could sneak your undies out of your room while you were sleeping."

He glowers at her, feeling utterly betrayed.

"But neither of us were counting on your pants-" She gulps, and looks worriedly at him. "I'm serious!"

"How could you?" he accuses, cheeks heating at the reminder of his ruined pants, and how he still needs to get a fresh set of clothes.

Tenten winces. Ducks her head and doesn't look at him. "I- I was also curious about... well, about your butt."

"And this is how you'd choose to look at it?" Neji bristles uncomfortably. It hasn't occurred to him that Tenten would be interested in his naked behind before this. It's a strange, yet heady, feeling, knowing that she's imagined him in less clothes than his usual attire. But he'll save that thought for when he's properly dressed. "Surely there's a better way to do that."

She flushes, and stares at him. "I- I wasn't counting on your pants ripping," Tenten squeaks.

He doesn't miss her brief glance towards his hips.

"Tenten," he protests, frowning. They aren't... that close... yet.

"Why don't I lend you my pants?" she offers awkwardly. "Then you'd have some way of covering up, at least."

Neji doesn't know if Hiashi will be more prone to an aneurysm if he were to show up in Tenten's pants, or with a gaping rip in his own.

Wearing Tenten's pants means that he'd get to see her bare legs, though.

And that she'd see him butt-naked. It's not a thought he's comfortable with.

"No," Neji decides. "We'll get back and I'll put some new clothes on. And you can return my underwear."

"Okay, okay," Tenten agrees sheepishly. "It's actually in the empty room next to yours."

Neji suddenly feels very, very stupid. He sends Tenten a sullen look - she's lucky that he likes her as much as he does. If it were Lee revealing this to him...

Beating Lee up in his mind helps ease his anger some, and Neji grits his teeth.

"Look, what about an exchange... I'll do whatever you want if you'll forgive Lee and I for this," Tenten offers, when they begin leaping between roofs again.

Neji quirks an eyebrow at her. "Are you sure about that?"

Tenten swallows, and continues to hold his gaze. "It... can't be that bad, can it? I mean, you won't put me through hell, right?"

The possibilities are endless, and Neji takes a moment to consider his options.

He finds that he rather likes where this is headed, angling a small smile towards her. "Fine."

Tenten narrows her eyes at him. "Somehow, I don't think I'll like where this is going," she mutters suspiciously.

Neji continues to smile placidly. Perhaps his day isn't completely ruined, after all.

* * *

_A/N: Not my favorite piece.. I wrote it on two separate days and kind of lost steam on it... but hey, how many times do you see Hyuuga Neji ripping his pants? ;)_

_And again, check out _Giada Luna_ because she's awesome! (Her _You Must Believe in Spring_ is eventual NejiTen - very complex and detailed... like canon Naruto, only better ;) )_


	22. Sparks and Firecrackers

_Written for the Lunar New Year, but I got distracted posting the Team Shira drabble and completing Close Knit Shinobi. :P _

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

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**Sparks and Firecrackers**

"You just want to wake everyone up, don't you?" Neji says flatly beneath Tenten, his arms folded.

"Of course not!" she answers with a grin, as she ties a string of huge firecrackers on an overhanging tree branch. "That's why we're doing this outside the village!"

"We did the same last year and the year before, Neji, don't you remember?" Lee beams, bouncing around, way too energetic for having returned from a long mission just hours ago.

"The firecrackers are larger this year than they were last year," Neji points out levelly. He surveys the area around them with his Byakugan, to make sure that there aren't unfortunate civilians wandering around at this time, or enemy _nin_ thinking of moving in to disrupt the moment.

Tenten lands lightly on her feet next to Neji and grins at him. "We'll keep it short this year, just so you can return to your beauty sleep - how about that?"

He frowns at her - this celebration is in honor of Tenten's family traditions, that she's brought with her to Konoha since moving here with her parents. Her parents are long gone, though Team Gai is Tenten's new family, and Neji, in no way, wants to cut short her yearly practice. "I'm fine," he tells her.

Tenten beams at him.

Gai shows up a little later, bearing boxes of sparklers. Lee and Tenten cheer loudly, skipping over to his side to relieve him of his gift. Neji watches as Tenten produces a lighter from somewhere, and hands everyone a sparkler.

"Come on, gather around so I can light them all at once," she announces.

The four of them stand in a close circle, holding the tips of their sparklers together while Tenten flicks her lighter open. The amber flame dances against the charcoal-coated ends of their sparklers, and it isn't long before the first sparkler begins to fizzle, emitting bright white sparks.

Tenten squeals, Lee cheers, and Neji holds his sizzling sparkler out in front of him stiffly, while his teammates move away to draw shapes in the air.

Gai comes to stand beside Neji, smiling over at him. The brilliant white sparks leap away from their sparklers, extinguishing as they fall to the ground. "Still holding on to that old flame, Neji?" he asks sagely.

Neji frowns. "What old flame?"

He doesn't miss the glint in Gai's eyes, illuminated by their sparklers.

"Tenten. It's been years, hasn't it?" Gai asks quietly, and Neji freezes, glancing away.

How did Gai know about that?

As if the older man has read his mind, he smiles, and continues, "Perhaps Tenten is the only one who's been oblivious to it."

Neji looks sharply back at him. "Only- only Tenten?"

Even Lee knows? He digests this piece of unexpected news slowly, embarrassed.

But as _shinobi_ of Konoha, love is not something they should shy away from. Sarutobi Hiruzen, Tsunade, and all the other Hokage have repeatedly emphasized the Will of Fire - love for the village, and love for its people. Love for one's family, friends, comrades, and lovers.

Does Tenten-

"You won't know until you try," Gai tells him with a fatherly smile, as the last of their sparklers fade into the night.

Neji blinks at him, and at Tenten, who's bounding up to them with fresh sparklers. She shoves one into his hand, and extends another to Gai, leaving three for herself.

The grin on her face is very much alive; Neji stares at her for a brief moment, wondering what she feels about him.

"Isn't it time for the firecrackers?" Gai asks genially, and Tenten grins at him, pulling a watch out.

"In two minutes!" she answers, and turns back towards the tree, where the the firecrackers are. "Gather around, I'll light them once it's midnight."

Neji makes his way slowly over to the firecrackers, where Lee is now attempting to do a hundred push-ups before the sparkler embedded in the ground before him fizzles out.

"Lee!" Gai exclaims, heading towards his protege. He plants his sparkler next to Lee's, and settles next to the younger version of himself. "Let's do two hundred push-ups before my sparkler extinguishes!"

Neji exhales and watches the greener half of Team Gai yell at each other, all while executing rapid push-ups, a step up from their usual.

"Some things never change, huh?" Tenten says from beside him, smiling fondly at the Green Beasts.

"Yeah." Neji looks at his fading sparkler. "It seems that they have to do this every year, or die trying."

Tenten chuckles softly, and they fall into companionable silence, waiting until Gai and Lee have hit their targets, and are standing and hugging each other, tears streaming down their faces.

"It's two minutes past midnight," Tenten announces dryly, glancing again at her watch.

Gai begins to apologize, but Tenten waves to shut him up.

"I'm lighting the firecrackers," she informs them all, flicking her lighter open. The same amber flame caresses the thick, white wick leading up to the firecrackers, and she steps away once the wick is lit. "Stay back."

The four of them retreat somewhat, and Tenten comes to stand by Neji beneath another tree, almost touching him, but not quite. The heat of her body tempts across the inches between them.

Anticipation hangs heavy in the air as the little flame creeps up towards the firecrackers, leaving a trail of burnt cotton in its wake. The first of the firecrackers begin to snap with loud crackles and bursts of light, like little packets of gunpowder going off all at once, and the momentum carries through to the rest of the festive red cylinders. Smoke puffs from the string of firecrackers, lit by steady pulses of light.

They remain silent for a while through the discordant snapping; Neji glances at Tenten, wondering if right now is a good time to say something to her, anything, to perhaps drop a hint about his feelings.

She leans into his arm, and, to Neji's utter shock, laces her fingers between his.

Tenten must have noticed his sudden stiffness, because she turns to look at him, a tiny smile playing on her lips. "I thought this would be a good start to the new year," she says quietly.

He blinks owlishly at her, and Tenten sighs, shaking her head.

She tiptoes and presses her lips to his cheek, whispering, "Gai-_sensei_ told me I should make the first move, because you keep dragging your feet."

Neji stares at her, eyes wide now, and glances towards Gai and Lee, who are doing their best to not look over at them. He glowers, cheeks unpleasantly hot.

Tenten squeezes his hand to return his attention to herself. "So? They're right, aren't they?"

He looks into her hazel eyes, lit by the fireworks, and at her moist lips. Tenten smiles up at him, comfortable in his presence, and in that moment, Neji knows there is really only one course of action that he wants to take.

He steps back, so all that's visible to Gai and Lee are the back of Tenten's head, and leans in, pressing his lips tentatively to her soft, soft mouth.

Cheers erupt from behind Tenten; Neji closes his eyes in a bid to ignore that interruption, drawing away-

And Tenten follows him in his trajectory, capturing his lips before he can truly escape.

She smells like gunpowder and fire and sweat, and Neji freezes when she winds her arms around his neck.

"We're all family - they're bound to know sooner or later," she tells him, and kisses him again, amidst the little explosions sounding not too far away.

On impulse, he decides that she's right, and that he can stand to trust the rest of their team with this knowledge. It's a new year, after all, and the perfect time to fan the sparks between them.

Neji wraps his arms around Tenten's waist and pulls her closer, savoring the little gasp that escapes her lips. "I'm not going to regret this," he tells her, partly to convince himself.

More joyful whoops sound in the background.

"Neither am I," she answers, and smiles against his lips, the promise of warmth blazing in her eyes.

* * *

_A/N: something fluffy after all that sobering/hilarious stuff from the previous weeks :P hope you guys had a wonderful weekend!_


	23. Facials

_This popped into my head, and I had to write it. **Warning for gross stuff/TMI - usage of bodily fluids in an unconventional way.** You have been warned._

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Facials**

The late afternoon sun beat harshly down on Konoha, like it had been doing for the past few weeks. Patches of grass were already yellow, and heat waves rippled over the village, sucking moisture and energy from plants and humans alike. Tenten had never thought Konoha to be anything like Suna, though with the current drought they were facing, it felt as if every inch of her body was drying up, her skin turning fragile and wrinkly like an old woman's.

"This heat is unbearable," she told Neji, who was walking beside her. They were headed home after a day of training, and Neji, as usual, preferred to walk her back to her apartment first. "I need a shower, and I need to wash my clothes. My laundry has been piling up."

Neji looked over quizzically at her. "You haven't been doing your laundry?"

With this drought, Tsunade had put a ban on the operation of laundromats and washing machines, much to the misery of most people in the village. Tenten was just glad that she had enough clothes to last her until the end of the week.

She frowned. "No, I haven't. It's not so much a pain as the detergent drying my skin up. It gets itchy and distracting."

"There should be lotions available in the shops - have you checked?" Neji returned thoughtfully.

"I have," Tenten groused, thinking about the times she looked in the cheapest shops she frequented - all their stocks of the moisturizing cream she used had been depleted, and she was reluctant to put money down for high-end lotions. She wasn't that particular about her skin, anyway. "They're sold out."

"I could look for some on the compounds for you," Neji volunteered, flicking his gaze in the direction of his home.

"No, don't bother." She waved him off with a tiny smile. "It isn't that important."

"But your laundry-" he reminded her.

"I'll get to it," she sighed. The subject of moisturizers brought to mind a conversation she and Ino had a week ago, and it hadn't been that much of an issue then... But with the supply of lotions dwindling as it was- "I heard that there's a very affordable source of moisturizer, though."

Just the thought alone was enough to make her blush. Tenten was glad that they were climbing the stairs to her apartment, and that she was looking away from Neji - she didn't want to be seen getting flustered over a topic like this.

Neji raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"

Tenten looked everywhere but him, fumbling for the key to her apartment. "Well, it- bodily secretions help, apparently."

"Oh?" He was watching her with avid interest, and Tenten couldn't fight the heat soaking through her face. She made her way doggedly to her apartment door. "So you shouldn't find the lack of moisturizers an obstacle to doing your laundry."

"Not everyone can produce it," she muttered, finally inserting her key to the keyhole.

"Why not?" It seemed as if Neji was hell-bent on probing into this subject, and Tenten gulped, still avoiding his gaze.

"I- I've heard that only guys can produce it," she squeaked, and stepped into her apartment, her cheeks burning.

_Damn it, Ino, why did you have to put that thought in my head?_

Neji was silent for a while, and Tenten chanced a glance back at him, swallowing dryly. "Do you want to come in for a drink?"

"Sure," he accepted, and Tenten found herself in her apartment with Neji (which was usually not a big deal), having to answer the most embarrassing questions in her life.

She filled two mugs with cold water from the fridge, and handed one to him. He took it with a word of thanks; she watched as he brought it to his lips, drinking it with slow bobs of his Adam's apple.

Well, she didn't need her thoughts going there, either.

"So," Neji began slowly, when they were seated next to each other on the only couch in her living room, "Seeing that I'm male, I would be able to solve this lotion shortage of yours."

He glanced quickly at her.

Tenten choked on her water.

"Are you-" She coughed and sputtered, and set her mug down, lest she spilled it all over the floor. "Are you serious?"

It wasn't like she hadn't thought about it before, but having Neji actually volunteer to help?

He nodded.

"Are you aware of what it entails?" she asked, feeling exceedingly awkward. Tenten didn't know if she should look at him - her face was probably as red as a crimson sunset, and Neji looked at her like she was behaving perfectly normally.

He didn't make to answer her question, instead responding, "Enlighten me."

She covered her face. Tenten didn't know if she could do this and not die of shame. "You really don't have to," she hedged.

"It doesn't bear a cost to me, does it?" he asked in return.

"It depends on how you see it," she told him, her voice muffled by her palms.

How on earth did she get Hyuuga Neji in her apartment, (unknowingly) volunteering his bodily fluids for the good health of her skin?

"Supposing I don't think of it as a cost," Neji began evenly, "What do I have to do?"

If she thought she was going to die of shame before, Tenten was positive that she was shriveling up with mortification right now.

"You, um, you- you- Oh gods, I can't do this," she stuttered. She didn't know how she'd be able to look at Neji in the face again.

Why the hell did Ino think this was a good idea?

"Essentially, this would require me to engage myself, seek release, and hand over the resulting bodily secretions to you," Neji deduced mildly next to her.

Tenten froze.

He put it across more elegantly than she could ever have hoped to do.

She didn't know what to think of it, so she jerked her head down in a nod, holding her breath and sneaking a peek at him.

Neji was looking intently at her. Her muscles tensed. All Tenten could think was _kill me now_, though she blurted, "You really don't have to. I'll get to my laundry eventually, and-"

He pried one of her hands from her face, and rubbed a thumb over the back of her hand. Tenten vaguely noted that Neji's warm fingers were soft and smooth against her palm.

"Your skin is dry," he observed, before flicking his eyes back to her face. She gulped. "We should try your idea, unless you're opposed to it."

Tenten didn't know if the blood vessels in her cheeks had burst - she was blushing hard enough to leave Hinata in the dust.

"Um, okay?" she squawked, surprised that he was still agreeable to the idea. She didn't know what exactly to think of smearing his... bodily fluids... on her skin. But Ino had extolled all the benefits of it, and Ino's skin was perfect.

"You weren't going to ask the others, were you?" Neji asked suddenly, his brow crinkling, and Tenten blinked at him for a moment. She thought about Lee, and the rest of the guys in their cohort.

She shuddered involuntarily. "No!"

A fleeting look of satisfaction crossed his features, and Neji was back to business once more. "There are different methods we can use for the... extraction," he said.

Tenten stared at him. "What?"

He exhaled slowly, and she thought she saw a faint tint of pink rise to his cheeks. "I could carry it out myself, in private. Or, should you wish to aid in the collection..."

She almost fainted.

"A-Aid in what way?" Tenten stammered. It wasn't as if she wasn't interested in him, but to have him put it across so bluntly...

Neji's gaze slid off from her, as if he wasn't expecting her response. The tips of his ears turned red, visible from between locks of his hair. "That's up to you," he yielded eventually. "You could observe, or... provide physical assistance."

His cheeks were flushed, and so were hers. Neither of them looked at the other.

"I'll-" Tenten gulped. Her heart pounded in her chest. "I'll provide physical assistance. Since you're doing this for me, after all."

She'd never expected them to start off like this.

"What do I do?" Tenten asked awkwardly, cringing at how decidedly unromantic all of this was.

"If this location is agreeable with you," Neji began tentatively. "And if you'd rather keep it discreet, we can begin like this."

She nodded. Neji watched her warily from the corner of his eyes.

"I'll... start the process," he said haltingly, shifting on the couch, "Then you'll be able to help from there onward."

"Right."

She watched as he cautiously reached for the drawstring of his pants, slowly undoing the ties. Neji was about to dip his fingers past his waistband when he paused, glancing at her. He swallowed.

"If you're uncomfortable with this at any point, we'll stop," he told her, pale eyes heavy with solemnity. "And we'll forget this ever happened."

Tenten nodded again. "Yeah."

With that out of the way, Neji reached into his pants, and Tenten gulped as she watched the progress of his fingers from the way the material tented over his hand. He began stroking, slowly, flicking the occasional glance at her.

He withdrew his hand after a while, licked his lips nervously. "If- If you do still want to provide assistance..."

There was a significant bulge in his pants, and Tenten shivered just by looking at it. She didn't need him to tell her what to do, reaching forward before he could complete his sentence.

He was firm through his clothes, and Neji drew a sharp breath when she curled his fingers around him with some trepidation, uncertain about her next actions.

For a long moment, neither of them said a thing, merely staring at each other. She squeezed him experimentally; his nostrils flared in response.

It wasn't like she didn't know how guys pleasured themselves - but she'd never seen it before, only heard about it. Tenten swallowed, and the most brilliant idea came to mind - a way to hide her inexperience.

She kissed him.

Neji froze against her, and Tenten drew away, uncertain about whether she should've done it.

But he leaned in, seeking her lips, so she pressed her mouth to his. Kissing Neji was hardly unpleasant - his lips were soft, and he moved against her carefully, trying to learn her for the first time. Tenten moaned against his lips when he slipped into her mouth and their tongues met, and he grew rapidly in her hand.

If she thought he was big before, he was huge now, very thick and very hard beneath his clothes. She groaned at the thought of his flesh. The fabric was only a hindrance now; Neji did not protest when she sought the waistband of his pants, easing it down around his length.

Tenten felt herself grow very warm between her legs, but she didn't pull away to look at him, merely stroking over his velvety length, that was moist at the very tip. Neji moaned into her mouth, and she tried a variety of caresses like she'd done with herself, learning how he liked to be touched by the noises he made.

He broke the kiss suddenly, his chest heaving, pale eyes clouded with lust, and whispered her name raggedly.

She knew to pull away, looking down, still stroking, and Neji snatched at his shirt, tugging it up so he spurted onto his bare chest and stomach moments later, pulsing in her grip.

For a long while, neither of them spoke - Neji caught his breath, and Tenten stared between his face, his crotch, and the mess they'd created on his torso.

"Um," she said, licking her lips nervously.

"Your hands," he reminded her, watching her expectantly.

Tenten gulped and released him, dipping her fingertips into the warm, gooey fluid on his toned abdomen. It had the consistency of runny snot or egg white, and she brushed it tentatively onto the back of her other hand.

"Rub it in, let it dry, then wash it off," Neji told her, tugging his underwear and pants back into place.

She gaped at him, barely remembering to do as he instructed.

The thick fluid dried quickly on the backs of her hands in this heat, and Tenten watched as all traces of it disappeared, save for a remaining tiny glob or two. She swallowed, and touched her hands tentatively when they dried.

To her surprise, her skin was much softer, and silkier than before. Her gaze snapped to Neji.

"It worked," she blurted.

He blinked at her, and looked towards his chest, where the rest of the mess was slowly drying up. "Do you want any more of it before I clean it off?" he asked.

She hesitated, then wiped the rest of the thick fluid off his skin. "Don't be grossed out," she told him, and proceeded to, per Ino's instructions, smear it across her face.

Neji stared at her.

"It's an experiment," she told him, saving the sheer ludicrousness of the situation for musing upon at a later time.

"Right," he answered. "I'll be heading to the bathroom for a while."

Tenten watched as Neji tugged his shirt back over himself and retreated to her bathroom for a few minutes, rubbing the drying fluids across her cheeks. This had to be really awkward for Neji, she thought. Maybe she should've saved it for until he left.

When he finally emerged from her bathroom, clothes straightened, Tenten's attention dropped to his hands, and her eyes grew wide.

"You knew," she breathed, making the connection.

"What did I know?" he questioned with a frown, taking a seat on the couch again and drinking from his mug.

"Your hands," Tenten told him. "They're soft and smooth like..."

She didn't complete her sentence, and the flush rising on Neji's cheeks was enough to answer her question.

"I should return the favor," he told her, leaning in close and kissing her on the lips. His fingers brushed her hips, trailing up her side, and Tenten decided that this idea was perhaps, not a very bad one, after all.

* * *

She met Hinata the next day, to return the empty salve bottle that Hinata had given her filled with ointment, and Hinata gasped when Tenten's fingers brushed hers.

"Tenten-_san_!" she exclaimed, pale eyes dropping down to Tenten's hands. "Your fingers-"

Tenten smiled, rubbing her fingers together. "I finally found a lotion that works," she told the Hyuuga heiress.

"What is it?" Hinata asked in wonderment. "Just two days ago, they were rough..."

"Um." Tenten flushed, remembering the additional rounds of 'lotion' that she had coaxed from Neji.

Hinata really didn't want to know her honest answer to that, Tenten was certain.

"It was a- a magical cream I got from a wandering vendor," she fumbled, and tensed when Neji brushed past her shoulder from behind, arching a slender eyebrow at her.

Her cheeks grew even hotter, and Hinata looked dubiously at her.

"I, um, have to go," Tenten fumbled, turning and walking quickly away.

She felt Neji's eyes on her back for a long time, and hoped Hinata never, ever found out what her new secret was.

* * *

_A/N: Right now, you're probably thinking, What on earth is wrong with you AG?! You write the weirdest crap ever!  
I'm sorry :P_

_That was also the most awkward sex I've ever written lol :P Again, switching to past tense due to transition into original fiction._


	24. Ice Sculptures

_Posting a little early since there wasn't an update yesterday ;) This idea came up in a conversation with Yahboobeh ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Ice Sculptures**

It was one of those winters that saw a lot of snow in Konoha. The wind was thankfully not howling, and Neji was in his study, nursing a cup of green tea, book in hand. With any luck, he'd be able to practice the new techniques described in the book when the family _dojo_ was available - in the middle of the night, if he had to.

There was no way he was training out in the snow-covered training grounds, even if Lee and Gai insisted that it was perfect for building endurance. He'd had enough of training in the snow for the past five days straight, and he was going to take a break today, if only so he could get some peace and quiet in.

Tenten was, no doubt, lounging around at home, working on sealing more things into her never-ending supply of scrolls. (He'd given her a full bag of blank scrolls for her birthday recently, too.)

A commotion on the edge of the compound caught his ears then, and Neji blinked, looking up. It sounded distinctly familiar.

Like Lee trying to pummel his way in.

With a resigned sigh, Neji pulled on various layers of clothes, and then his boots. The chances of Lee coming by just for a casual visit were next to none - there was bound to be something their _taijutsu_-idiot wanted. Besides, Neji figured, he could go check on the _dojo_, to see if it was available to train in.

He finished his tea, turned the electric kettle off, and stepped out of his room, shutting the thin _shoji_ doors behind him.

He had barely drawn a lungful of crisp, cold air when Lee made an appearance right in front of him, cheeks pink from the cold, his breath puffing in wispy clouds. "Neji!"

"What is it?" he asked evenly, knowing that there wasn't any point in getting annoyed - Lee was Lee, and he was going to insist that Neji join in whatever ridiculous activity he'd thought up this time. (Granted, Lee's ideas sometimes held merit, so Neji refrained from declining before he'd heard the entire suggestion.)

"Let's visit Tenten!" Lee said excitedly. "I'm sure she's bored at home!"

Neji quirked an eyebrow. He could think of several things Tenten could be doing at this time, and none of them were a product of boredom. "What if she's busy?"

Lee beamed. "Then we'll work as a team and help her with her tasks!"

It didn't sound like a bad idea to Neji, so he shrugged, and followed Lee out of the Hyuuga compounds. (He didn't miss the few eyes that followed them on their way out - the Hyuuga did not like to deal with loud people, not even during winter. Especially not during winter.)

Since it was late afternoon, Neji suggested that they dropped by the marketplace for some hot snacks; Lee agreed.

They ended up in front of Tenten's apartment with a bag of disposable bowls full of dessert. What had caught their attention, though, was the row of colorful ice blocks sitting atop her parapet wall. Most of them were either cylindrical with a bump at the tip, or almost-completely spherical, with pointed ends like lemons. Neji raised an eyebrow; Lee grinned.

Tenten answered the door shortly after Lee hammered on it. She'd seen them through the peephole, so there was a smile on her face as she ushered them in.

"I wasn't expecting either of you to show up," Tenten chirped, shutting the door behind them. Her gaze dropped to the bag Neji was holding.

"We brought some dessert," he explained, handing them to her. "Glutinous rice balls in ginger soup. You mentioned a fondness for them."

Tenten's countenance lit up, and she accepted the bag from him, placing it on the dining table. "I was just thinking about making a warm snack," she replied, heading into the kitchen. "Hot tea for both of you?"

No sooner had they all seated themselves around her cluttered living room table, sans coats and shoes, than Lee asked, "Tenten, are you making water balloons?"

She blushed lightly and looked at the assortment of things arranged on the newspapers protecting the surface of the table. "Well, I'm making ice sculptures."

There was a large jug of water, half-full, bottles of assorted food coloring, a few water balloons, tied up in various shapes... and a large bag of condoms.

Neji blinked. "You couldn't find balloons?"

The tint on her cheeks grew darker, and she barely glanced at him. "Well, I happened to come across a bunch of expired condoms, so I figured that they may as well be put to some use."

Lee's inky eyes grew wide. "That's a brilliant, youthful idea, dearest Tenten!"

Neji didn't look away from his teammate; his interest was piqued. "Did you just stumble upon them on the street?"

Tenten blinked at him sheepishly. "Well, someone gave them to me, and I-"

"Someone gave them to you?" he repeated, unsure if his discomfort with the idea stemmed from Tenten turning condoms into water balloons, or her accepting condoms from a mystery person (when it should've been him, damn it, but they aren't that close, and-)

"And I have been putting them to good use," she told him firmly, grabbing a filled condom-balloon by its open end (this had knots on either sides of the contained water, to form a lemon-shaped sculpture), and bouncing it with her fingers. "Do you guys want to help? I'd like to try more complex shapes this time, and I need some extra hands - you came at the right time."

Neji swayed in his seat at the thought of Tenten putting condoms to "good use", and shook the thought away before it consumed him.

"Did you guys see the sculptures I made?" she continued cheerily, waving towards her door.

Lee nodded and gave a wide grin. "This is a great idea! I'm sure Gai-_sensei_ would love to be presented with a sculpture shaped by your hands, Tenten!"

Neji winced, and Tenten smiled pleasantly at Lee, albeit there was a hint of uncertainty on her features.

"Anyway, I need you guys to hold the balloons together while I tie them in place," she instructed.

Neji watched as she reached into the bag of condoms, drew a square packet out, and tore it open, pulling a rolled-up ring out with a flourish. The condom glistened wetly under her fluorescent lights, and both he and Lee watched in fascination as she unrolled the latex to its very tip, two fingers holding the sealed end firmly.

If it was only him and her in the apartment, and if she was rolling the condom out over something else instead- Neji blinked his thoughts away. He really shouldn't be thinking this, not when Tenten trusted him as a friend and teammate.

It didn't stop a faint trace of heat from heading south, though.

Tenten got Lee to stretch the mouth of the condom open, while she tipped water from her jug into the sheath, until it was about three-fifths full. Then she released a drop of green food coloring into the water, and took the condom gingerly from Lee, tying it up so that little air remained in the sealed latex.

They repeated this a number of times, until there were about six colorful, phallic shapes on the table, and Tenten began fitting the limp balloons together, curving them around each other in various ways.

"Lee, hold these two here," she instructed, and looked towards Neji, who had been sitting on the couch the entire time, warily watching as they made various water balloons. "Neji, I need you to hold the other two while I tie them up."

He reluctantly obliged - until Tenten leaned over him, trying to get her cotton twine beneath all the water-filled condoms.

It was somewhat warm in the apartment - the radiator was just next to the couches, and Neji could scent her skin when she brushed against him. She came a little too close, her front almost flat against his back, thick layers of clothes between them, though she appeared not to have noticed, stringing her precious condoms together with various knots.

Neji tried not to let his mind wander, but it was difficult, and he wanted to know what her skin felt like against his lips.

She bumped into him once, her arm against his mouth, and apologized. He didn't mind - he was too distracted by the pale, spidery lines of scars across her skin.

It felt like forever before Tenten exhausted her entire condom collection, and Neji rubbed his oily fingers together, wondering if sex would smell like latex and sweat on their bodies.

"Now we put them out," she announced.

They got up stiffly, following her to the front door, where she set the various odd-looking condom sculptures on the parapet walls, and buried others into buckets of snow by her door, that Neji had not paid much attention to before.

"Are you going to cut the strings off when they've frozen?" Lee asked excitedly, looking at the condoms full of water.

"I am!" Tenten answered, her cheeks pink from the cold.

Neji looked at the various filled condoms and condom-less sculptures on the parapet, and wondered why on earth he liked Tenten, of all people.

It wasn't as if he had a choice whom he developed an attachment to, though.

They retreated into the apartment after a while, washed their hands, and ate the still-warm soup that Neji bought, regaining the heat lost when they stood in the cold. Tenten was still flushed, a delighted smile on her face, and Neji couldn't stop staring at her.

At length, their conversation drew to a lull, and Neji pushed his empty soup bowl away, feeling a little too full even though it was time for dinner. He'd probably have to be back at the compounds soon.

"Ah, I forgot!" Lee yelped suddenly, looking at the time. "I promised Gai-_sensei_ that we'd be training together in the evening!"

Both Neji and Tenten stared at him.

"Now?" Tenten gasped, looking between Lee and her wall clock. "It's going to be freezing out soon!"

"Exactly!" Lee enthused. "We'll be pushing the limits of our bodies!"

Neji sighed and shook his head slightly. "You'll catch a cold," he said.

"It's a promise," Lee answered, giving them both a thumbs-up. His teeth glinted in a smile. "Do you want to come along, Neji, Tenten?"

"No," they told him vehemently.

It wasn't long before Lee shoved his coat and boots back on, and was out of Tenten's door before either of the remaining members of Team Gai could convince him otherwise.

Tenten filled their mugs of tea again, tossed the empty soup bowls, and returned to the dining table, sitting across from Neji. He lifted his eyebrows, watching her placidly.

"Thanks for helping with the sculptures," she told him with a tiny smile. "I was probably going to spend the whole day making them otherwise."

Neji shrugged. Her earlier words came to mind, and he couldn't help blurting, "You received the condoms from someone?"

Tenten froze. The most sheepish look crossed her features; Neji watched her suspiciously.

"Well?" he pressed, when she still didn't say anything.

A deep blush rose to her cheeks. "Well, I- I, um, I bought them."

Neji felt his eyes grow wide. "You bought them?"

Tenten lifted her mug nervously to her lips, gulping tea down. "They were on sale," she told him in a small voice. "I- I figured it wouldn't hurt to have some."

The silence between them grew awkward.

Neji decided that he would not reveal his interest towards her, instead asking, as coolly as he could, "I assume you've put them to good use? Before they expired."

She flushed further. "I- I don't know what you mean by that."

The frown on his forehead deepened. Tenten had to have used them, to react like how she was doing.

"I hope he treated you well," Neji muttered, as much as he didn't want to acknowledge the idea that Tenten might've been intimate with someone he wasn't aware of.

"What?" she sputtered, her gaze snapping up to meet his. "Who?"

Was there more than one guy?

Neji stared at her, a little offended that she never mentioned seeing anyone. "There's been... more than one?"

She looked at him as if his eyes were changing colors. "What are you talking about, Neji?"

He swallowed, disappointed that there wasn't a chance he could be her first, now. "From the way you responded," he explained uneasily, "I got the impression that you used the condoms with more than one person."

Tenten's eyes almost fell out of her face - she was staring at him that hard. "What- How- What kind of person do you think I am, Neji?!"

Neji shrugged uncomfortably. "Am I wrong?"

"Yes!" Tenten spluttered. Her lips moved, but she didn't say anything for long moments. "I thought you knew me better than that!"

He frowned. "What did you use the condoms for, then?"

Her face was back to being a deep shade of crimson, and she fidgeted in her seat. "That's none of your business."

"It isn't," he agreed. "But it'll help me know you better, since we agree that I don't know you as well as I should."

Tenten caught her bottom lip between her teeth, her gaze shifting. "Well, you just have to know that I haven't used them with anyone."

Did she not use condoms with other people, then?

Neji stared at her in horror. "Does that mean-" He cleared his throat, embarrassed that they were even discussing this topic. "Does that mean that you've been having unprotected sex?"

Tenten exploded.

"_What?_" she bellowed, staring at him. This time, he was certain her eyeballs would fall out. "How- Why- What the hell are you talking about, Hyuuga Neji?"

He frowned, certain that she understood where he was coming from with that question. "The condoms," he told her, "You said you haven't been using them with anyone."

Tenten drew a deep breath to calm herself, clapping a hand over her face. "I haven't been using them with anyone. Because I haven't had sex in my entire life!"

Neji stared at her and gulped. There was another silence, more awful than the last.

"Oh," he said, feeling decidedly unintelligent.

"I thought you were a genius," she groused, her cheeks still red. Tenten was looking everywhere but him.

He had the decency to keep silent - he'd overstepped his boundaries, and Tenten was bound to kick him out of her home anytime, now.

It was another long while before either of them spoke a word.

"Have you?" Tenten asked, with a touch of hesitance.

"Have I what?" Neji returned, relieved that she hadn't told him to leave yet.

"Had sex," she answered with a wince.

That was not the reply he'd expected. This time, it was Neji's turn to drag his feet on his answer. "Is this relevant?" he hedged.

She frowned at him. "But I just told you my answer."

"Knowing my answer doesn't affect us as a team," he protested lightly, swallowing his nerves.

"This is between us as friends," she snapped, her lower lip pushing out in a pout. "Or are you afraid of answering?"

"I'm not afraid," he told her, annoyed that she was backing him into a corner.

"Then you're embarrassed about it," Tenten pressed, this time with a grin. She leaned forward, and Neji tried not to glance at the vague shape of her chest beneath her shirts.

"It's not proper to discuss this," he protested.

Tenten rolled her eyes. "Yeah, after you touched all my condoms and have intimate knowledge about them."

He narrowed his eyes. "You asked me to help."

"Back to the question," Tenten reminded him. He looked sullenly at her. "Have you had unprotected sex?"

"No." Who would?

She quirked a brow. "Have you had protected sex?"

So that was the game she was trying to play. Neji frowned, eventually yielding, "No."

"Ah ha!" Tenten grinned. "So you haven't had sex before, either!"

"And?" He looked warily at her.

"I don't see why you had to be so embarrassed about that," she teased. "Embarrassed that you're still a virgin?"

His forehead creased so deeply that it would probably never straighten out right again.

"That has nothing to do with anything, Tenten," he muttered, distinctly uncomfortable. It was one thing admitting it to Tenten, though Naruto, Kiba, and the rest would probably tease him to no end if they knew. "What were you doing with those condoms?"

"It's not important," she said lightly, waving his question off.

"If it wasn't, you wouldn't be dead set on not answering it," he told her. Tenten's smile turned a little stiff, and Neji knew she was hiding something. "It's something you're embarrassed about."

She scanned him carefully, still smiling. "I'm not hiding anything."

He watched her dubiously. What use could she have for a condom, if not for sex?

"You do have condoms that are not expired," he suggested.

Tenten parted her lips, but did not answer for a long moment. "What's it to you?"

The pieces connected in his mind, and Neji's eyes widened. For her to have fresh condoms meant that she needed them for a purpose other than making water balloons - and that had to involve sex. But Tenten wasn't having sex with anyone... meaning that she had to be doing something with herself.

She recognized the look of understanding in his eyes, and tensed. "You really need to go home, Neji," Tenten insisted, looking at the clock. She gulped audibly.

It was a little too late for that - blood had started pooling in his groin, and Neji didn't want to stand, for fear of accidentally exposing his predicament. He was sure his clothes were thick enough that they would cover any incriminating evidence, but... he didn't want to take chances.

"I don't have to be home anytime soon," he told her, certain that his presence would not be missed at the compounds. "You're hiding something, Tenten."

She flushed, and her eyes darted away from him. "I'm not."

"Do condoms fit over household objects?" he asked mildly.

The intensity of color on her cheeks grew threefold, and he knew he'd found the right answer.

It didn't help his arousal any, though. In fact, Neji was certain that now was absolutely not the time to stand up.

His mind wandered beneath the layers of her clothes, and he felt his clothes tighten more than they already were. Neji swallowed. And wondered what it would feel like to touch her between her thighs.

"You're spouting nonsense," she finally said, looking towards her bedroom. Neji followed her gaze.

The answer had to be in the chest of drawers next to her bed.

He fought the temptation to look, to know what she had been using on herself. His fingers twitched. Neji shifted in his seat, and the pull of cloth against his turgid flesh sent his attention back where it shouldn't be.

"Show me," he said quietly, without thinking.

"I..." Tenten fumbled, uncertain.

Neji stood then, his chair rumbling across the floor, and he saw her eyes slip over his body, and anchor at his hips. Her pupils dilated.

Tenten wet her lips with her tongue, snapping her eyes back to his. There was no sign of revulsion on her features, and Neji dared to hope that she was just as interested in him as he was in her.

He took a step forward, and another, and her gaze dropped back to his hips. Her nostrils flared, and she drew deeper breaths, her chest heaving.

"What you do with those condoms," he repeated, "I would like to see it."

She slowly nodded, and rose to her feet, heading to her bedroom. "You promise not to laugh," she mumbled.

He noticed that she'd left a damp patch on the dull grey vinyl of her chair, and his pants grew unbearably tight.

"Tenten," Neji whispered, needing her suddenly, his lust rearing its ravenous head. She stilled at the sound of her name, and he was behind her quicker than she could move.

"Yeah?" she replied.

He slipped an arm around her waist, pulling her back flush against his chest, against his hips, and she gasped sharply, but did not move away.

"Is it fine if I-" He trailed the fingers of his other hand up her midriff, to her chest, and she nodded jerkily.

It didn't take long for him to find the seam of her clothes, or to lower his lips to her throat, and Tenten moaned when he trailed kisses along her neck, squirming.

"Neji," she hissed, and shivered hard when he slipped his hand between her legs, finding her wet flesh. He found her breasts with his other hand, tweaking a nipple, and she gasped, growing slicker yet.

Tenten ground herself into his fingers when he paused in his caresses, and Neji groaned, feeling himself throb with need. He pressed fingers into her - she enveloped him silkily, and he turned her around. There was unadulterated desire in her eyes, and they found themselves on her bed, shrugging out of their clothes.

She took him into her hand, squeezed him, and he groaned.

Perhaps those condoms would come in useful, after all.

* * *

_A/N: I don't know how it ended up like that, but okay ;)_

_In other news, I'm actually on the third chapter of that AU I'm working on. I don't know why stories keep blowing up like that. :P Look out for it this coming Friday (Pacific Time)!_


	25. I'm Not Who I Am

_I wasn't planning on posting today, but I read _PrincessHyuuga01_'s _The Switch_, and it led me to write the following crack._

**_Important note: _**_In _The Switch_, Tenten and Sasuke undergo a body swap, leaving Neji confused as hell. This is my take on Neji"Sasu", which is Neji and Tenten in Sasuke's body. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**I'm Not Who I Am**

It had been a day of strange events, and Neji was more than ready to return home, shower, and crawl into bed.

As it was, he found himself in an unfamiliar location - it was a cross between a warehouse and a small residential apartment, and he didn't know how better to describe it. The place he was standing in was the warehouse side of the building, and Neji turned towards Sasuke, who frowned and worried at his lower lip.

For as long as Neji could remember, Sasuke never bit on his lip. But Sasuke, and even Tenten, had been behaving strangely for the past couple of days, and Neji couldn't figure out why.

As it was, Sasuke was stepping towards him, his eyes strangely expressive, in a way Neji had never seen before.

"Why did you lead me here?" Neji questioned.

"Neji," Sasuke whispered. He paused mid-step, two feet away from Neji, and glanced between Neji's eyes and mouth.

What the hell?

"Uchi-" Neji began warily, but the next thing he knew, Sasuke's arms were wrapped around his neck, and Sasuke's lips were on his.

They were moist and soft.

Neji shoved him away in disgust and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. Why on Earth did Sasuke even think that Neji was remotely interested in him? He wasn't gay, for crying out loud.

Sasuke stumbled backwards, shock and embarrassment staining his features. He stared at Neji, mouth opening and closing. No words came forth.

"Neji, I-" Sasuke paused and gulped, his voice sounding strangely strangled. "I'm sorry about that, Neji. It's just that I..."

When did Sasuke start addressing him by his first name? Neji frowned in confusion. Did Sasuke have a crush on him?

Neji started to back away, horrified. He had no idea that Sasuke was gay. Worse, he didn't know how to reject Sasuke without sounding like a dick. How had he not known about Sasuke's feelings?

"You don't have to say more," he grit, swallowing uncomfortably.

"But I-" Sasuke looked at him helplessly, again with those trusting eyes. "I've liked you forever, Neji."

Neji felt his stomach turn. He wasn't sure if things could get worse than this. That had been his first kiss, and Sasuke had come waltzing right in and stolen it from beneath his nose.

All he knew was that he didn't want to be here.

"It isn't what you think it is," Sasuke said pleadingly.

Neji's brow furrowed deeper. "What?"

"I've told you, I'm not Sasuke, Neji," Sasuke said. "I'm Tenten."

Neji stared at him. "You need to visit the hospital, Uchiha," he said. "You don't seem to be drunk, but I think you've hit your head pretty hard."

"No, I'm not Sasuke!" Sasuke cried. "I'm Tenten! Sasuke and I somehow swapped bodies two days ago, and- and I don't know how to return to my own body."

Neji observed Sasuke silently. There was no such thing as swapping bodies. Sasuke had to have hit his head and sustained a concussion or something.

"Come on, let's get you to the doctor," he said, turning to the exit.

"I'll prove that I'm really Tenten," Sasuke said behind him. "We met in elementary school. You were in my class, and I sat right in front of you."

Neji frowned. Tenten had been sitting in the seat in front of him when they first met.

"And there's that secret blind date you went on with Ino," Sasuke continued.

Neji froze, and glanced sharply at Sasuke. "Who told you that?"

"You told me yourself," Sasuke grumbled, pouting. "We met at your place after the date, and you told me that you felt like you were forced to kiss Ino."

Neji felt a little sick. He wasn't sure if it was because Sasuke knew his secrets, or if it was because Tenten had somehow spilled them to Sasuke, and breached his trust.

Anger swelled in his gut. "You shouldn't say any more, Sasuke."

"I'm Tenten, not Sasuke!" Sasuke snapped. "Do I have to kiss you again to prove it, Neji?"

Neji winced, and turned an accusing glare on his friend. "I'd appreciate it if you kept your lips to yourself."

Sasuke flinched. He turned his eyes down, and sighed. "Talk to Sasuke, Neji - he's in my body. The Tenten you see is actually Sasuke."

Neji frowned, and looked away. "I'll find Tenten, and we'll sort this out."

* * *

Neji grimaced and closed his eyes.

Sasuke was Tenten, and Tenten was Sasuke.

Or rather, Tenten was in Sasuke's body, and Sasuke was in Tenten's body. It sounded wrong, it looked wrong, and Sasuke was standing across from him, fists propped on his hips, tapping a foot.

"So now you believe me," Sasuke-who-was-really-Tenten said.

The real Sasuke (who was in Tenten's body) had made himself scarce, and Neji didn't know what to think.

"I guess," Neji eventually yielded.

"So now that you know I'm really Tenten," Sasuke's grating voice said. Neji looked up. Onyx eyes bored into his; large hands grabbed his own. "May I- May I have..."

Sasuke's usually-stern face turned red, and he looked away.

"What do you want?" Neji asked tightly. He still couldn't come to terms with Tenten being in Sasuke's body. It felt like the universe was playing a cruel joke on him. Or maybe Sasuke was.

"May I-" Tenten gulped, and Sasuke's Adam's apple bobbed. "May I have a kiss?"

Neji stared at Sasuke (who was really Tenten), aghast. "You've got to be kidding."

Tenten shook Sasuke's head. "Not joking. I've dreamed about your lips on mine."

It felt really, really weird hearing that in Sasuke's deep voice, and seeing Sasuke's dark eyes gazing into his.

"Are you going to ask for sex next?" Neji inquired flatly, unamused.

Sasuke nodded his head, and Neji stifled a cringe.

This had to be the weirdest day of his life.

"Well, we won't talk about sex yet," Tenten said in Sasuke's voice, waving breezily. "Just a kiss. That's all."

Neji screwed his eyes shut, and opened them again. Sasuke was still standing in front of him, and looking at him expectantly.

"Just a quick one, please?" Sasuke asked coyly, batting his eyelashes.

Neji gulped. This was... not what he had bargained for.

But he had wanted to kiss Tenten for a long time.

Slowly, he nodded, and Tenten stepped forward in Sasuke's body, eagerly, black eyes wide and filled with excitement.

Neji took a deep breath.

_Think about Tenten. Think about Tenten. Think about Tenten._

Sasuke's face stared back at him, and Neji did not feel any attraction towards this face at all.

"I can't do this," Neji said after a moment. He looked away from those hopeful onyx eyes. "Not while you aren't back in your original body."

Tenten lowered Sasuke's gaze, downcast. "But I may not get my original body back."

Neji winced, and heaved a sigh. "Trust that you will."

Sasuke's lips pulled into a wince. "But that could take forever!" Tenten grumbled in a low tone. "Isn't love supposed to transcend appearance?"

Neji pinched the bridge of his nose. "I can't kiss you while you're looking like goddamn Sasuke!"

Dark eyebrows drew into a frown; Sasuke's face looked more foreboding than usual. "What if you closed your eyes?"

It sounded like a plausible solution.

Slowly, Neji jerked his chin down, hardly able to believe that he'd just agreed to kiss Uchiha Sasuke's body full on the lips.

Sasuke (or rather, Tenten) grinned.

Neji closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and leaned in. Alarm bells were still going off in his head. It couldn't be that bad, could it?

Tenten's lips (_not Sasuke not Sasuke not Sasuke_) were warm and soft, and Neji leaned in closer, when Tenten threaded her fingers through his hair, slanting her lips over his. Their tongues met.

A low moan sounded, distinctly masculine, and not from Neji's lips. He cringed slightly.

The door burst open.

"What the _hell_?" Tenten's voice screeched. "Hyuuga, get your damn face _away_ from mine!"

Neji jerked away, as if scalded. His eyes flew open to find a red-faced Sasuke across from him, and a furious Tenten (who was really Sasuke) at the door.

He exhaled slowly. This couldn't possibly turn out well.

Sasuke stalked forward in Tenten's body.

"I can't believe you did that," he snarled in Tenten's voice. Dark brown eyes glowered at Neji, and to the side, Sasuke (who was really Tenten) blushed guiltily.

"Don't you dare kiss him while you're in _my_ body!" that familiar feminine voice growled dangerously. "Hyuuga, I expected better of you."

Neji found it extremely strange to be staring down Tenten's eyes, and having to think of Sasuke behind them. "I'm not gay, if that's what you're saying."

"If you're going to be shoving your tongue down my throat," Tenten's voice filled the warehouse, and Neji watched as slender fingers jabbed in his direction, "At least have the decency to acknowledge that you're kissing a _guy_."

"I'm not a guy," Tenten protested, her voice deep and masculine. Neji didn't want to think about that voice moaning in his ears. He especially did not want to think about how he'd been french-kissing Uchiha Sasuke on the lips.

"And don't you fucking dare have sex with him," Tenten-who-was-Sasuke sniped at Sasuke-who-was-Tenten. "I don't need his hands all over my junk."

"I'm not touching any male genitalia that isn't mine," Neji protested. "Contrary to what you think, Uchiha, I'm not gay."

"I'd better not return to find your hands down my pants," Tenten's shrill voice rang out.

"Trust me, you won't," Neji shot back. "I'm not interested in your manly parts."

It felt ridiculous saying that to Tenten's face, when all manly parts were in the direction of him and Sasuke's real body.

Neji heaved a sigh when Sasuke took Tenten's body out and slammed the door, leaving him and Tenten (who had black eyes and a too-manly physique) alone in the warehouse, all over again.

"So," Tenten said slowly, with Sasuke's voice. "How did you like the kiss?"

That had to be a loaded question.

Was he gay if he enjoyed that kiss? It hadn't been too bad. Maybe if they tried it out again, Neji could decide if he enjoyed it. And it was a kiss with Tenten, not Sasuke.

"I haven't decided," Neji said slowly. "But we could experiment with it again."

Sasuke's lips pulled up in a smirk that was unpleasantly familiar, and Neji headed to the door, where the light switches were. He flipped all the lights off.

Large hands found his arms slowly, backing him into the wall. Tenten, in her original body, would not have had the strength to do this quite so easily. But Tenten, in Sasuke's body, was a little forceful, and Neji tried not to think about the smell of Sasuke's breath.

"Neji," came the low growl, very masculine in nature. Neji winced.

"Don't talk," he warned, "I don't need to be reminded of your current predicament."

"It's not like you're as affected by it as I am," Sasuke's voice muttered, and the next thing Neji knew, a large hand was roughly grabbing his and flattening it against the bulge of Sasuke's jeans.

Neji hissed and yanked his hand away, as if burned.

In front of him, Tenten heaved a sigh. "I'm wet for you, Neji," she admitted in Sasuke's voice.

"Don't do that." Neji winced. He was going to have very uncomfortable memories of Uchiha Sasuke after this.

"I'll shut up," Tenten said, and kissed him again.

Assuming that most lips and tongues felt the same, Neji thought that kissing Tenten like this wasn't too bad - he was most definitely not kissing Sasuke. Tenten cupped his face and slid her lips over his, parting them. Their tongues met, and Neji groaned.

A large hand reached into his pants. Neji froze, uncertain.

It didn't feel bad.

It was Tenten grabbing him.

The only point of contention being that she was using goddamn Sasuke's body to do this. Did this mean he was gay?

Neji didn't know. He figured that he shouldn't think too much about this, either.

He groaned again when Tenten undid his pants and pulled him from his confines. Her hands felt good stroking over him, and Neji couldn't help thrusting into Tenten's palm.

He didn't imagine that their first time would occur in a place like this, or under their current circumstances, but Tenten's touch felt good, and Neji didn't want it to stop.

Especially when Tenten broke the kiss and crouched in front of him. He felt her breath on his tip; his breathing hitched. Neji swallowed, anticipating the heat of Tenten's mouth.

* * *

Neji felt like dying. Or burying himself in a tunnel to the center to the Earth.

Sasuke (in Tenten's body) had seen him. With Tenten. Who was in Sasuke's body.

Tenten had been using Sasuke's hand to fondle his unmentionables. Which was standing at full mast.

When Sasuke burst into the room. In Tenten's body.

Why hadn't they locked the door? They needed to figure out how it locked. Or Neji really needed to stop himself from getting into situations like this with Tenten while she was in Sasuke's body. It wouldn't have been as incriminating if he were merely discovered making out with "Sasuke"...

But when "Tenten" flicked the lights on, Neji had found Sasuke's body crouched in front of him. Tenten had been on the verge of taking him into Sasuke's mouth.

Neji clutched his head.

That had been an image he never, ever wanted to see. In his entire life.

It might not have been that bad if the lights had remained off, and they'd done the deed in the secret of darkness.

But now Sasuke had seen Tenten about to use his body to give Neji a blowjob, and Neji didn't know which one of them had it the worst.

He really, really felt like shriveling up into a tiny ball of shame. He wasn't gay, was he?

* * *

_A/N: I hope I haven't broken your minds lol. This was hilarious when I first wrote it. ;) If you read Princesshyuuga01's The Switch and are interested in seeing it result in NejiTen, please do inform her with a review - whether it ends up as SasuTen or NejiTen depends on readers' votes. :P_

_As always, thank you for reading and taking the time to review. :)_


	26. The Slide

_This was supposed to be a short one-shot. I have no idea how it turned into 3k words lol. Came up with the idea while talking with Yahboobeh ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**The Slide**

"Hey guys, wait up!" Tenten called, as the last of the verdant brush in the Land of Rivers faded away into harsh, blinding desert, and Team Gai forged on ahead, determined to make it to their destination before nightfall. "I have a better way to cross the desert."

Everyone knew that the journey from Konoha to Suna took a minimum of three days, no matter what. The forests of the Land of Fire made up a third of this journey; rivers wound through low shrubs in the second third, through the Land of Rivers, and unyielding, scorching desert occupied the remainder of the route to Sunagakure.

In front of her, Gai, Lee and Neji drew to a stop, each of them looking hardly the worse for wear. This wasn't the first time they'd run nonstop to Suna, though Tenten wished that they'd slow down for a break more often. Train as hard as she might, her stamina was still no match for any of theirs.

"Oh? What do you have in mind?" Gai beamed blindingly at her, propping his hands on his hips. Next to him, Lee and Neji stood quietly, waiting for her to continue. Tenten drew a scroll from the collection at her waist.

Lee's face transformed suddenly, to one of delighted comprehension. "This is your secret project, isn't it?" he cried. "You have been working on it for months!"

Neji raised a slender eyebrow, as if to say, _Why haven't I been informed of this?_

She grinned, unraveled the scroll, and with a calculated eye, channeled some chakra into a specific seal.

With a poof, a gigantic, metallic construct appeared in front of them, stretching forward as far as the eye could see.

Neji and Gai stared. Lee gave an excited whoop of joy.

"This," Tenten began proudly, "Is my slide. I have decided that it's far quicker and more energy-efficient to let gravity do the work for us."

"That is brilliant, Tenten!" Gai flashed a thumbs-up at her. "Are you saying that all we have to do is climb to the top of the slide, and allow it to pull us towards our destination?"

"That's right," she affirmed, still smiling. "I've tested it myself a number of times - it's steeper towards the top to allow us to gather momentum, and once that's done, it smooths out somewhat to maximize the distance we're able to travel."

Neji frowned. "It sounds almost too simple to be true."

Tenten waved towards the alternating platforms that led the way up to the top of the slide. "There isn't a ladder - I figured it would be faster if we jumped all the way up, rather than mess with hands and feet."

"And you've tested it?" Neji looked up, following the platforms to the very top of the slide. A moment later, he activated his Byakugan, to closely inspect it. "I didn't think you'd be able to find any space in Konoha to work on this."

She grinned and shrugged. "I cleared out some of the forest around the village - that's why you haven't seen it."

His forehead remained creased, and at length, Tenten could tell that he'd inspected every inch of her brainchild.

"Well?" she asked.

"I suppose we could give it a try," he said, though there remained vestiges of uncertainty on his regal countenance.

"Can I go first?" Lee shouted, hopping from foot to foot in barely-restrained anticipation. "This is the very essence of youth, Tenten!"

She grinned at his enthusiasm. "Well, first, I would have to oil the slide - it'll greatly reduce the amount of friction produced."

A container of cooking oil poofed into existence when she activated the next seal in her scroll, and she leaped up to the top of the slide, liberally sloshing the fluid down the steep chute. It had previously been oiled while she did her tests - this was just a supplement. Far below, the rest of Team Gai resembled tiny ants - such was the magnitude of her creation.

When she was done, Tenten returned to the rest of her team.

"What next, Tenten?" Gai asked, with a hint of pride shining on his face.

She surveyed their team. "Well, the last step of our preparation also involves reducing the friction between us and the slide - to do that, we'd have to be dressed in the appropriate attire."

Neji quirked an eyebrow at her.

Tenten smiled. "Lee, you're fine as you are - spandex is very smooth. All you have to do is hold your backpack in front of you, and you're good to go."

Lee cheered.

"Gai-_sensei_," Tenten said next, "Your flak jacket will provide too much resistance - take it off and hold it together with your backpack against your chest when you slide."

Gai saluted, his lips parted in a wide grin.

"What about us?" Neji asked suspiciously, eyeing both her clothes and his.

Tenten forced herself to stifle her smile. "Well, it seems that we'd need a change of clothes."

Comprehension dawned on Neji, and he stared at her incredulously. "I'll pass on the slide. I am just as capable of running next to it."

Tenten was sorely tempted to force him into a spandex outfit, but refrained. She had timed herself on the slide - it was faster than her running speed, and even Neji's. "Fine," she conceded. "But if you end up slower than us on the slide, you're joining us on it."

Neji narrowed his eyes, but nodded.

"Lee?" Tenten smiled sweetly. "Do you happen to have a fresh spandex outfit on you?"

The younger Green Beast lit up. He grabbed the neckline of his outfit, reached in, and produced an identical set of green spandex with a flourish. "Here! I have another for Neji, if he needs it!"

Tenten tried not to wince at the sweat that must have soaked through the spare suit, even if Gai swore on its sweat-wicking capabilities.

"Right," she began, as the men on Team Gai stared at her. "I'm not changing into spandex while any of you are watching."

Immediately, the three of them turned their backs on her. Tenten sighed, and smiled. She was about to suggest that they head on first, but this worked just as well.

In a matter of seconds, she had shrugged out of her usual attire, and donned Lee's spare spandex outfit. "Right, I'm ready," she told them, and they faced her once again. (Neji was staring at her spandex outfit.) "Remember, hold your backpacks in front of you. More importantly, lie down flat against the slide - it'll help to reduce the air resistance you'll face when travelling at that speed."

"Yosh!" Gai and Lee both cheered, punching the air.

"And since this is a race-" Tenten looked meaningfully at Neji at this juncture. "-You may begin... Now!"

Neji sped off in the direction of the slide, and Tenten hurried after Lee and Gai, who leaped up the alternating platforms as if their lives depended on it. She followed, hot on their trail, and heard both Lee and her mentor yell youthfully as they flew down the steep slide, like green bullets shooting through the desert.

"This is amazing!" Lee was hollering.

Tenten grinned and joined them on the slide. The view of the desert was breathtaking from the top; she glanced briefly at the endless sand dunes stretching out in front of her, before pushing off.

As much as she wanted to lean over the side of the slide to see how Neji was faring, Tenten resisted, knowing that she needed as little air resistance as possible in order to increase her speed. She did anticipate the look on his face, though, when he realized that he had ended up last.

The end of the slide journey came all too soon; Tenten expected the drop down into the sand, and pushed off before she could land ungracefully on her butt.

To the side, Lee and Gai were already doing pushups while they waited for her, and Neji was nowhere to be seen. Tenten grinned.

The Hyuuga prodigy showed up half a minute later, lilac eyes narrowed.

"You lost, my eternal rival!" Lee crowed. "Tenten's youthful idea has enabled us to travel even faster than before!"

"And so you shall join us on the slide," Tenten concluded, grinning mischievously at Neji.

He stared balefully in return. "Fine."

Tenten and Gai watched on triumphantly as Lee fished his other spare suit out from his neckline, and Tenten glanced away (reluctantly) while Neji eased himself into skin-tight spandex.

A giggle escaped from Tenten when she stared back at him, and Neji glowered at her.

"I'm so proud of all of you!" Gai wailed, "We're the embodiment of 'team spirit'!"

Lee looked around tearfully at all of them. "Yes, Gai-_sensei_! At long last, Neji and Tenten have agreed to wear our team uniform!"

"We make a fantastic team!" Gai exclaimed, on the verge of an emotional breakdown.

"Let's get going already!" Tenten snapped, before their mentor could attempt to engage them in a team fist pump, that always resulted in staring incidents between Neji and himself. She produced the scroll that the slide was previously sealed into, sealed the slide, and proceeded to unseal it closer to Suna, so that they would be able to climb the slide and repeat the same procedure.

"Neji, you'll get on the slide after Lee and Gai-_sensei_, and remember to hold your things in front of yourself!"

He had just finished cramming his clothes into the drawstring bag he always carried. Tenten followed Neji up the slide, after Lee and Gai had shouted their way up. It felt really weird looking at Neji in a green spandex outfit - he had never worn that loud one-piece suit in all the years she'd known him, and Tenten had to admit that it fitted him nicely, even if it was a piercing shade of forest green.

Like her, Neji paused at the top of the slide to absorb their surroundings - reminiscent of a hawk surveying its territory - and then he was off, plummeting down the slide.

Tenten hopped onto the slide soon after, remembering to keep her back flat against smooth metal. From her almost-vertical position on the slide, though, she saw that Neji had sat up when the steepness of the slide diminished, so that he was losing speed as she approached him, fast.

"Neji!" Tenten yelled, eyes widening at the imminent crash. There was just about fifteen yards between them.

He broke away from staring at their surroundings to glance back at her.

"Keep your back down!" Tenten called, "You're losing speed like that!"

Pale eyes widened when he realized that she was gaining on him. He froze, still sliding along, considering his options, and Tenten realized that she was going to crash into him anyway.

"No, don't lie back down!" she hurriedly amended. "I don't want to kick your head!"

Tenten came to the conclusion that there was only one way they could get out of this without harm.

She parted her legs as she approached Neji from behind, and fitted his hips between her thighs with a dull, but forceful, bump.

It wasn't the smoothest position, and she had never dreamed about this, but there was a first for everything.

Slowly, she held her backpack to the side and sat up behind him, looking around at the view. There wasn't much of a point worrying whether her sitting up would have any impact on their speed, since Neji was already encountering the air resistance for both of them, anyway.

"Sorry about that," she said quietly, as the wind whistled past their ears. "I should've reminded you to remain lying down."

"I'm at fault too," he admitted sheepishly.

Lee and Gai were far ahead of them, and Tenten found that she didn't mind that, not at all.

"Nice view," she commented. "It kind of all looks the same, though."

Neji nodded his agreement, though that did not stop him from looking around the desert, even as they drew closer to the ground with each passing second.

"Sorry about the spandex outfit," Tenten muttered sheepishly. "It really was the best choice on this slide, honest."

"I figured," he said dryly, looking backwards at her. "Are you comfortable back there?"

Tenten made a face. "Well, it feels weird having my legs open around yours like that."

The embarrassment that followed that was more uncomfortable than the oil that had soaked through the spandex suit to her skin. Tenten winced.

"Um, I didn't mean it like that," she blathered, hoping that Neji wouldn't find their situation too awkward.

"It's fine," he said instead. "Maybe we should lie back, in order to stop ourselves from slowing down any more."

"Right." Tenten leaned back slowly, and Neji followed after her, so his oil-slicked hair pressed into her chest. She squeaked in surprise; Neji turned to investigate, and promptly faced forward, because he'd accidentally pressed his cheek into her breast.

Tenten gulped. Was this what it was like to be physically close to Neji? She certainly felt very comfortable pressed against him like this.

Lee and Gai were at the base of the slide doing more pushups yet by the time they arrived. At the hiss of their approach, Lee jumped up, and his inky eyes grew as round as saucers when he caught sight of Neji and Tenten.

"Is that a new method of travelling?" he asked excitedly, turning to Gai.

Neji removed himself promptly at the end of the slide; Tenten wobbled a little on her feet - she wasn't prepared to leave the heat of Neji's body that soon.

Gai, wise mentor that he was, gave Lee a knowing grin. "That is Neji and Tenten-"

Tenten stared between the Green Beasts in horror.

"No!" she cried. "Neji just happened to slow down in front of me. I suggested this method of travel to regain our speed, since we couldn't change the situation we were stuck in."

Gai fell silent, but scrutinized her and Neji curiously. Lee, on the other hand, accepted her words with a smile.

"That would explain why you were slower coming down the slide!" he mused.

Tenten gave an uncomfortable shrug. "Well, now that we know what went wrong, we will be able to take steps to prevent it."

She sealed the slide, and unsealed it so that it appeared before them again, ready to be put to use.

"I'll bring up the rear," Neji volunteered. "That way, I will not cause the team to slow down unnecessarily."

Tenten shrugged. "Fine with me."

As before, Lee and Gai scaled the giant slide first. Tenten pushed herself off after she was certain that her two teammates were sufficiently far ahead, and Neji waited behind, so he could set off at his own time.

Some seconds into the ride, Tenten glanced up at the slide to see if Neji had joined them. He was still a ways behind, to her surprise, as if he'd only just begun sliding down.

She sat up.

It had not been unpleasant chatting with him on the ride down the previous time, so she continued to reduce her speed, turning back every so often to check on his progress. When he was finally within two yards of her, Neji sat up as well.

"Why did you slow down?" he asked with a frown.

Tenten grinned and shrugged. "It was fun the previous time."

His weight and speed was greater than hers, though, and Neji had to pull the same maneuver to avoid having his feet hit her hips unceremoniously - he parted his legs, and she fit snugly between his thighs with a slight bump.

Their combined speed was higher than what she'd been sliding at. Tenten turned back to grin at Neji. "Don't you find this fun?"

He shrugged. "It beats listening to Lee and Gai-_sensei_ the entire way."

She smiled, and leaned back against his chest. Neji caught a sharp breath, though he didn't attempt to put any distance between them. "This feels like we're on a sightseeing tour through the desert, doesn't it?"

Tenten tipped her head to the side, to gauge his reaction, though what she did not expect to see was his focus lingering in the vague area of her... chest?

Heat washed through her cheeks. "Neji?" she asked quietly.

He jerked his eyes away from her. "Sorry."

Tenten shrugged. "I can't fault you for looking - they do appear bigger when you look at them from the top down."

"I was... not looking at you," he said tightly, fixing his eyes on some spot on the horizon.

She frowned. "What were you looking at, then?"

He parted his lips, but no sound emerged. "The spandex," he finally said, lamely. "I've never seen you in spandex before."

Tenten rolled her eyes. "The only reason I'm wearing it is that it provides the least amount of friction against the slide. Lee lent me a set while I was testing this out."

"Oh," Neji replied. "It... doesn't look bad on you."

Coming from him, it was quite the compliment, and Tenten beamed. "It looks good on you too."

He frowned at her, protesting, "Green spandex does not-"

"It's okay, Neji, I'm joking," she hurried to assure him. "Let's lie back, I think Lee and Gai-_sensei_ are already at the end of the slide."

Neji fell silent and looked towards their destination, where their teammates were lifting their hands to shield their eyes. "They're watching us."

"Right." Tenten pressed her back against Neji's chest. "Lie back, we'll lose less speed that way."

"But-" Neji choked on his words, refusing to straighten his body. "It isn't convenient for me to lie back-"

"Just give me your bag," she suggested, reaching back for it.

"It's not that," he fumbled. "I'm... not able to lie down."

Baffled, Tenten turned at her waist to stare at him. "Why not?"

"Well..." Neji looked away, and Tenten took the opportunity to scan the slide behind him. When that yielded nothing out of the ordinary, she looked over Neji, to see if there was a problem with his person.

There was one, in fact. She couldn't stop staring at the bulge in his spandex outfit.

"Tenten," Neji grit, embarrassed. "I would appreciate it if... we agree that nothing happened."

She gulped, and knew that the answering heat between her legs had every bit to do with his arousal. But she didn't know how to react in this situation, so she looked forward, her heart pounding in her chest. "What about Lee and Gai-_sensei_? What if they find out?"

Neji cringed behind her - she could feel the way he tensed - and sighed. "I'll just remain behind you," he said.

Tenten swallowed, her mind wandering very freely beneath his clothes. "Okay," she agreed. "But I won't be able to help you much other than that."

"That's fine," he told her. "Though I think you're right - we should lie back so our speed doesn't drop further. That is, if you-"

She leaned her back into his chest once again. "Lie back, Neji."

He made a strangled noise when he pressed an indent into the muscles of her back. Tenten squirmed, and her attention was anchored to him. Suddenly, she didn't want to be out in the desert with Lee and Gai. She wanted to be in a room with Neji, so they could solve this little problem of his.

When they reached the end of the slide, Gai was staring at them openly, his face full of unspoken questions. Neji held his drawstring bag in front of himself, and Tenten repeated the resealing and unsealing procedure, so that the slide was before them once more, pointing the way to Suna.

"Maybe you and Neji should go first, Tenten," Gai said seriously. "That way, Lee and I can provide backup in case anything happens."

"Or is Neji impeding your progress?" Lee asked innocently.

Tenten winced. "No, it's fine. It was just a one-off thing - I had Neji carry one of my scrolls for me, and I wanted it back from him, which is why we slowed down."

Gai's suspicion eased, and Tenten gave him a bright smile.

"Go on ahead, we'll be right behind you," she promised.

This time, Neji volunteered to go on the slide before she did, though Tenten did not have to travel far before she caught up with him once again.

"You're liking the paired sliding, huh?" she teased. He had slowed down enough for her to reach him early on, and Tenten wondered if he was still distracted from before.

Neji gave a light shrug. "I don't mind travelling with you."

She grinned, reached forward to deposit her backpack in his lap, and hugged herself to his back. Neji tensed very slightly. "It didn't seem like either Gai-_sensei_ or Lee noticed."

"They didn't," he agreed with a measure of relief.

"So what got your attention like that?" Tenten asked. The corners of her lips quirked. "Are you that starved of physical touch?"

"I'm not." He turned and frowned at her, and she remained grinning.

"It would help if you, ah, got rid of your problem there," she suggested.

"With enough meditation, it'll go away," Neji said stubbornly. "I would prefer if you didn't touch me, Tenten."

Feeling brave very suddenly, she grinned, and allowed one of her hands to trail down his abdomen. Neji inhaled sharply, but did not make any move to stop her.

"But you like being touched," she pointed out. "Isn't that why you waited for me to catch up?"

Neji gulped audibly. "I was- I just thought it would be nice to have a companion."

"To help solve your problem?" Her fingers inched downwards, and Tenten licked her lips in anticipation.

"I... We shouldn't," Neji said finally. Yet, again, he made no move to stop her.

"You just don't want us to be caught," Tenten realized, when she dipped her fingers lower, and Neji shivered against her.

"I didn't say that-" he protested.

"But you're thinking it," she deduced triumphantly. "Admit it, Neji, you want to be touched."

He gulped, and didn't say a word. Tenten laughed softly.

"I'll take that as a yes, then," she suggested, and Neji dipped his chin, very, very minutely - but for Tenten, that was the equivalent of him shouting it to the world.

* * *

_A/N: HA HA Neji ;) _

_By coincidence, I happened to see that Team Gai scene, in which they're chasing after Gaara and Lee and Gai attempt to increase their travelling speed to 3-4 times their usual speed. SO hilarious. ;)_


	27. The Bra Prince

_Wasn't planning on posting today since I didn't receive a prompt for the angel/demon fic in time... But _Yahboobeh_ showed me a GIF which inspired this, and her birthday was a few days ago, so. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**The Bra Prince**

This was never supposed to happen.

"Get this off me!" Neji hissed, clawing at the tight elastic strap across his bare back. "I should never have agreed to this insane idea in the first place!"

Next to him on their training grounds, Tenten frowned. "Hey," she protested, "You were perfectly willing to put this on yourself. I didn't think it was cursed."

"It isn't cursed," he spluttered. Fumbled with the damnable hook-and-eye clasps. "It's just tight."

"Then how do you explain not being able to get it off?" Tenten scrunched her face up, reaching forward to help. But Neji's fingers were in the way, so she paused. "I didn't think a bra would be that difficult to remove."

"Take it off yourself, then," Neji muttered, pale forehead creased in a frown. His fingers scrambled uselessly over the beige material, relentlessly trying to find a way under them. "Cut it off if you have to."

She pursed her lips and studied the undergarment, before walking around to his front, where the bra cups bulged over his flat chest. "Well," she commented dryly, "At least you don't have a chest that fills the bra."

His lilac gaze snapped up at her, and he glowered. "Don't even suggest something like that."

Tenten tried fighting a grin down. (She failed.) "The good thing about this situation is that the bra's only an undergarment. You can wear something over it if necessary."

Neji straightened; he exhaled grouchily, forehead in a frown that seemed to be turning permanent. "There is no bright side to this situation, Tenten. I don't have the patience to deal with jokes right now."

She winced. "Well, dealing with jokes is better than dealing with-"

"Neji! Tenten! I see you've started your training already on this fine day-"

That awful yell silenced their terse conversation.

Neji froze, and was spinning away from the direction the shout came from.

It was too late to make his escape, however.

"Neji! My eternal rival!" Lee crowed.

There was a sudden silence, and no one moved. Discreetly, Tenten looked between their approaching teammate and Neji, who was desperately yanking his loose robes back up over his exposed skin.

(The beige bra was a shade darker than his complexion - it wasn't a pleasant color to begin with, and Tenten had been on the verge of throwing it out when the idea to have Neji try it popped into her mind.)

"Neji!" Lee gasped. "What was that on your back?"

"Nothing." Neji pulled his robes onto his shoulders and shoved his arms into the sleeves.

"But I saw something!" Lee exclaimed, wide-eyed and transfixed. "Is it for training?"

"No." Neji spun on his heels when the Green Beast approached him and poked his head to the side, to try and steal a glance into his robes. "Go away, Lee. This is none of your business."

"But we are a team, aren't we?" The cry was plaintive, and Tenten felt a little sorry for Lee. She felt a lot more sorry for Neji, however.

The more Neji turned away from Lee, the more resolute the latter became. The tension in their conversation escalated, to the point where Lee was starting to open gates, and Neji had no choice but to spin in his _kaiten_, to drive Lee away.

It became a battle of wills; Neji was forced to stop first, because he could only rotate for so long without getting dizzy.

Lee screeched to a halt soon after, skin reddened and hair standing straight up, sheer power emanating from him. "Neji!" he gaped, aghast. "Your- Your chest!"

Neji panted and flung a hand over the unnatural shapes of his chest, squashing them flat.

Tenten could only stare. It was like a horror show gone wrong.

"It isn't what you think it is!" Neji snapped.

But Lee's eyes had seen all he needed to. "Neji!" he howled, "My eternal rival is- is more youthful than I am!"

Tenten froze, and Neji stared at Lee.

"I need... Do you think Sakura-_san_ will lend me one of hers?" Lee asked them beseechingly, looking between their eyes, and Neji's flattened chest.

_No,_ Tenten wanted to scream.

"Yes," Neji grit. "But ask her with some tact."

Lee's inky eyes glowed, and he was dashing away in the next instant, leaving a dusty trail behind.

"Neji!" Tenten breathed, horrified. "Lee's going to get his face punched in!"

The Hyuuga prodigy shrugged. He had mostly regained his breath, and had released his chest to stare down at the crumpled shapes of his squashed bra. "That isn't my concern," he muttered. "I need this off."

"It's just a bra, right?" Tenten frowned.

Neji slipped out of his shirt again, and grimaced at the unsightly beige undergarment. "I can't return to the compounds like this."

"Let me try removing it," she offered. Tenten stepped up to Neji's back, and attempted to push her fingers beneath the bra strap - only to find that it had somehow adhered entirely to his skin.

"I told you," Neji muttered, when her fingers slid over the strap, unable to find a proper grip. "This thing is cursed."

"But I just wore it recently!" Tenten sputtered. "It can't be cursed!"

He turned an accusatory stare on her. "You talked me into wearing this, Tenten."

She flushed. "Um, well. Let's just try to get it off."

It seemed as if there was a very fast-acting glue between the bra and Neji's skin - she could not find a way under the undergarment despite circling Neji and pushing her fingers into the skin of his chest. Neji flushed uncomfortably.

"I'll have to cut it off," Tenten concluded. She fished a _kunai_ from her weapons pouch and brought it down where the clasp was.

The blade slid clean off the bra strap, leaving no damage of any sort.

"What?" she exclaimed in disbelief. "But I just sharpened it yesterday!"

"What's wrong?" Neji twisted slightly, trying to look behind his shoulder at what she was doing.

"I can't cut through it." Tenten gaped.

The furrow returned to Neji's forehead, and he squirmed. The bra strap slid off his shoulder in a way that would have looked very appealing on a woman.

She tried not to think about that.

"Maybe there are other areas of weakness," he suggested, pulling a _kunai_ from his own pouch.

"I should probably do it," Tenten offered. She waved her weapon; Neji shrugged, tucked his _kunai_ back.

This time, she moved to Neji's front, focusing on the thin, reinforced strip of cloth between the bra cups.

"I shouldn't have listened to you," he groused, pale eyes narrowed.

"Hush," she told him.

The _kunai_ blade hardly made a dent on the bra.

"Beige is an unsightly color," Neji said under his breath, when Tenten stepped away, mystified.

"Shut up," she told him, "That was my bra before it took a liking to you."

At that, Neji paled by several shades. "A bra is an inanimate object, Tenten."

"Oh?" she challenged, surveying the undergarment stuck to his chest. "Then tell me why this thing isn't coming off."

He glowered at her. "Damned if I know."

"Maybe it needs to be kissed, like in _The Frog Prince_," Tenten mused.

"The what?" Neji glanced at her, suspicion etched in his regal face.

"Haven't you read it?" Tenten asked, surprised. "It's a children's book. It's about a prince who was turned into a frog by a witch, and only the kiss from a princess who loved him would return him to his true self."

He scoffed. "That's fiction."

"Or maybe if I rode you like a horse," she suggested next.

Neji folded his arms, checking the position of the sun in the sky. "I need to be back at the compounds soon."

"Then let me try those methods!" Tenten insisted. At his incredulous stare, she continued, "Unless you want to bind your chest."

The thought of Neji wearing a bra, and having his chest bound on top of that, sent her into a fit of giggles.

"This isn't funny," he grit, clenching his fists.

It took her a while to sober; Tenten bit hard on her tongue and tried to keep from smiling. "Where do you think you should be kissed?"

Red surged into Neji's cheeks.

"I mean," she hastened to clarify, "Where should I kiss the bra? For it to return to normal?"

He clenched his fists; the look on his face told of extreme discomfort. "Wherever you think it best."

Tenten blinked and swallowed, casting her eyes over the satiny material of her former bra. It was now or never, so she bent slightly and pressed a kiss to the crest of Neji's left bra cup.

No reaction.

She tried the right bra cup next.

No reaction.

"Damn, this isn't going to work!" she exclaimed.

"Try harder," Neji insisted, still frowning.

"Where else should I kiss, then?" Tenten grumbled, looking up at Neji through her eyelashes.

He gulped. "Wherever. Just get it off."

"Maybe it involves you getting into the right state of mind," she guessed. "Maybe it'll only come off when it's in the mood."

"What do you mean by that?" The stare Neji sent her was unreadable - or perhaps he was just especially doubtful.

Tenten folded her arms across her chest. "See, bras usually come off when people are in the mood to... you know."

If Neji frowned any more, she thought, he was never going to have a smooth forehead again.

"And what are you suggesting?" he bit, shifting his weight between his feet.

She cringed a little, embarrassed. "Well... Maybe you need to get into a sexy mood."

"A sexy mood?" Neji echoed, crimson erupting on his cheeks in full force. "I'm honorable, Tenten, and I have to be back at the compounds in ten minutes!"

"All the more reason why we should try it!" she insisted.

"How do you propose I-"

His words were cut off when she stepped up close behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing her chest behind his back.

It felt nice holding Neji like that. He was sturdy and warm, and he smelled musky, of dried sweat.

"I think this leads to a sexy mood," Tenten whispered, trailing her fingers up his chest.

Neji became very, very still, and neither of them spoke.

She tried the bra - it was still glued tight to his skin, so she slipped her other hand down, towards his waistband.

It wasn't as if she intended to touch him _there_ \- really, she wasn't - but Neji's breathing hitched, and Tenten briefly wondered just how deep into this experiment they'd have to go before declaring it a failure.

"Tenten-" he muttered hoarsely.

The bra loosened around Neji's chest suddenly, and Tenten pulled away in a hurry, unwilling to get caught holding him longer than she should (even though it felt very nice, indeed).

"It worked," she gasped.

The clasp was now hanging open, and the beige bra was dangling loosely from one of his shoulders. He frowned at her.

"How did you know that would work?" he asked, narrowing his eyes.

"I didn't!" she squeaked. Heat crept up her cheeks. "Um, don't you have somewhere to go?"

"I do." Hastily, Neji plucked the bra off himself and shoved it at her, before pulling his robes on, and securing them tightly. "And that's the last time I'm agreeing to one of your insane ideas."

"Right." Tenten watched as Neji headed away from the training grounds as quickly as he could without breaking into a run. It was probably the weird bra that scared him away.

She glanced at the limp garment in her hands, and thought that she should probably ditch it soon - Neji trying it on was one thing, but she definitely did not want to help Lee if (heaven forbid) he were to find and wear it.

Tenten shuddered. That was a situation she never want to find herself in.

* * *

_A/N: Oh poor Tenten. And Neji flees. ;) Hope you guys enjoyed this! ;)_


	28. Contributions

_Tenten discusses the monthly weapons contribution with Neji and Lee. Came upon this idea while chatting with Yahboohbeh :) (This takes place before the 2nd chuunin exams and is more of a friendship thing.)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Contributions**

"Guys, we need to talk." Tenten bit her lip and paused in the middle of pacing. "The _chuunin_ exams are coming up soon."

Feet away, on Team Gai's usual training grounds, Neji and Lee looked at her.

"That's what we're here for, isn't it?" Lee beamed, throwing his arms in the air. "To discuss our strategy for the _chuunin_ exams!"

"And that's what we need to talk about," Tenten explained. "We're going to be in unfamiliar territory."

Neji folded his arms. "What is your concern then, Tenten?"

"To put it simply, I need to raise your contributions," she began. "Not just for food items, but for various tools and shields that we might need."

There was a brief silence in the clearing.

"How much money are we talking about?" Neji asked hesitantly, pale eyes studying her.

She pursed her lips, and began ticking the items off on her fingers. "Well, seeing as we'll be crossing unfamiliar territory, I figure that a long ladder might come in handy. And at least one shield, in case we encounter any desperate conditions."

Lee nodded. Neji frowned. "And are those significant expenditures?"

"They're not run-of-the-mill tools, Neji," Tenten huffed. "The ladder will be five hundred meters long-"

"Five hundred meters?" Lee squawked. "Where are you going to buy that?"

"I'm having it custom-made," she replied. "I asked the blacksmith. He said it would cost three thousand _ryo_."

"Three _thousand_?" Neji and Lee echoed at the same time.

"That's three times what I make in a month!" Lee sputtered, horrified.

Neji merely narrowed his eyes. (It was common knowledge that he didn't like drawing on his clan's coffers, and avoided doing so whenever possible.)

"And the shield is two thousand _ryo_," Tenten continued with a wince. "I'm not willing to compromise on its quality for a lower price. These two things, plus two weeks' supply of water, food, and pills, emergency first aid, and whatever tools we might need. I thought about acquiring a _chakra_ blade - just a short one is five hundred _ryo_ apiece."

"What's your total estimate?" Neji asked very calmly, for one who wasn't making much more than what Tenten was.

She opened her mouth to answer and paused, eventually sighing, "Six thousand _ryo_."

Lee's eyes bugged out. "That's two months' pay from each of us!"

"And I don't have all that money to pay for everything upfront," Tenten continued. "I mean, I know that I'll retain possession of the tools after the exams, so really, the costs should be borne by me-"

"But that won't be fair!" Lee exclaimed. "We're a team!"

"He's right," Neji agreed. "We're in this together. But don't you think Lee and I should take a smaller cut, since we aren't splitting the weapons up after the exams?"

Tenten gaped at him. Was Neji really suggesting this? "What?"

He tossed her an even stare. "You heard what I said."

"But- But that's not fair!" Tenten stuttered in disbelief. "I can't- You guys need me as your support!"

Lee's thick eyebrows drew together as he contemplated their options. "What if we gave you two thousand _ryo_ first, and after the exams, you return some of it to us?"

Tenten stared wordlessly at them. "But you've been giving me a weapons allowance every month since a few years ago!"

"Two thousand is twenty times the monthly contribution, Tenten," Neji pointed out.

She stared helplessly at him, feeling a little betrayed.

Tenten didn't even have to think about her last resort - it bubbled up on her own, when her throat grew tight and her eyes prickled.

Both men stared at her in horror when she turned away and sniffled.

"This was your idea!" Neji hissed at Lee.

"But- Tenten was supposed to be happy!" Lee fumbled.

"Tell her yourself then!" Neji snapped.

"I'm sorry, Tenten!" Lee wailed, just as she turned to see what they were whispering about. "Neji and I were going to give you a surprise!"

"What surprise?" she croaked miserably, blinking hard to hide her tears.

Lee pulled a sack out from behind his back and shoved it at her. "Neji and I have been setting some money aside every month in preparation for the exams. I think we have enough to cover most of what we need."

Tenten stared between the two of them and the bulging sack that Lee was holding out. "Really?" she mumbled.

It was a sturdy cloth bag that looked to be filled with paper notes, and neither Neji nor Lee seemed to be lying.

Her eyes grew misty again, and both her teammates stood their ground when she flew at them, throwing her arms around their necks.

"I want to punch you guys, you idiots!" Tenten howled. "How could you trick me like that?"

"It was Lee's idea," Neji said flatly. He patted her awkwardly on the shoulder. Next to him, Lee hugged her back, and Tenten missed the annoyed frown that creased Neji's forehead.

"Does that mean I get to keep the weapons?" she asked when she finally pulled away, sniffling delightedly. A smile pulled at her lips, refusing to dissipate.

"We can't lug it around," Neji pointed out.

Lee nodded enthusiastically. "You're very convenient to have around, Tenten."

At that, all her previous appreciation evaporated, and Tenten glowered at him. "I'm not convenient, Lee!"

This time, Neji did not hold her back when she charged at their teammate, intent on pummeling him to pieces.

As sweet as her teammates were, she was not convenient, damn it!

* * *

_A/N: ... yes the whole convenience thing. ;) ... I can already imagine Tenten having an entire scroll for entertainment on long journeys, like all sorts of games and puzzles and stuff... and even Neji would drive her insane LOL :P _

_I hope you guys are doing well! :)_


	29. French Brew Chronicles

_This was written in Dec 2014 on a flight from Los Angeles to Hong Kong (hence the old writing style). Flights make my head feel weird and I was trying to write something but Blackmail just wasn't writing itself, so I did this instead. Looking back on it, I could've done better.. but here you go. :P_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**French Brew Chronicles**

Tenten frowns, looking sourly back over her shoulder at her group of close friends on the other side of the coffee shop. Why did she have to refuse to back down from Ino's dare? Damn that pride of hers.

"Well, it's just a simple question - can't do even that, Bun-head?" Ino had challenged, and in the greater scheme of things, asking a handsome guy how he likes his coffee is far from the worst things that could happen to her (like losing the roof over her head, for example).

So Tenten swallows her pride and trudges over to the pale guy on the bar stool facing the window of the shop. She's seen him around in school before - Hyuuga Neji, the heartthrob on campus, and also the one guy Tenten has been sneaking glances at for some time, now.

"Hey, uh," Tenten fumbles, when she reaches his side. This is awkward.

He remains perusing his textbook, hardly acknowledging her presence.

"Um, hi," Tenten stutters. (Quick, get this over with - at least he doesn't know who she is.)

"I have a name," he intones, without looking up.

What is with this guy? Tenten frowns, and decides that she doesn't really like him all that much, after all. "Well," she begins, gesturing towards Ino, Hinata and Sakura. "Neji, my friends over there would like to know how you like your coffee."

Neji smirks then, a cool, arrogant twist of his lips that doesn't look so out of place on his regal features. Pity.

"I like my coffee how I like myself: dark, bitter, and too hot for you," he tells her without missing a beat, pale eyes focusing on her while he takes a sip from the paper cup sitting by his side.

Tenten gapes at him. "Are you serious?"

"No, I'm Neji, or have you forgotten?" He raises a slender black eyebrow at her. Tenten flushes to the roots of her hair.

"What the hell kind of person are you?" she sputters, unable to believe her ears. This is the guy that girls fan over? Well, she's quitting their ranks right this instant.

"The very worst." He looks over her, like a merchant eyeing a bolt of cloth.

"Ugh." Tenten shudders. "Well, I'm glad you aren't in my circles."

She turns on her heels and leaves him staring after her, stalking back to her girl friends. The aroma of coffee sweeps over her hair.

"I can't believe him," she mutters once she's seated back next to Hinata. "Can you believe how he answered? _'I like my coffee how I like myself - dark, bitter, and too hot for you.'_ I mean, really?"

"W-well, that's Neji for you," Hinata mumbles, looking down at her sweet tea. She isn't the man's cousin for nothing.

"You could've warned me earlier, Tenten growls. At least she's never tried chatting him up.

"Wow, he sure sounds like a jerk," Ino breathes, impressed. "Right up there with the likes of Sasuke, huh, Sakura?"

"Ugh, don't remind me," Sakura groans, covering her face with her hands, strawberry shake forgotten. It's a widely-known fact that she's just been dumped by Uchiha Sasuke not too long ago.

"That's what you get when you fall in love with an asshole like that," Ino dispenses sagely, chugging a mouthful of frappucino. "Find someone else better, like..."

"Like?" Tenten lifts her eyebrows, glancing up at Ino. "Lee's a sweetheart, if you ever wanted to give him a chance."

Sakura cringes visibly. "It's not that I hate Lee or anything, but he's just so weird, you know?"

"Well, Lee is pretty sweet, if you look past all that green," Tenten defends her best friend, who's had a crush on Sakura for the longest time.

"There's always Shino and Kiba," Hinata supplies quietly.

"And we all know that you have the hots for Naruto," Ino cackles, sending Hinata a suggestive look. "When are you guys getting together?"

"T-that's not- I don't think-" Hinata stutters, flushing a bright red.

"Well, it's easier staying single, isn't it?" Tenten asks dryly. "Don't you agree, Ino?"

"It has its perks, for sure," Ino grins. "I prefer the friends-with-benefits arrangement."

"Until your Facebook status becomes 'It's complicated', and it all goes to hell," Tenten agrees. She's been there, done that.

"So, about Neji," Ino reminds them, "Do you think he could ever be heartbroken?"

The table is silent for a while. Tenten is the first to speak. "Well, I don't think he has a heart to break."

"I challenge you to find it and shatter it to bits." Ino raises a challenging eyebrow.

Tenten blinks in surprise. "That's unnaturally cruel of you, Ino."

"Cruelty begets cruelty, doesn't it?" Ino presses, a gleam in her eyes.

"You do it, then. I'm not interested." Tenten returns her attention to her latte, sipping it from her cup.

"But you're the very person he's most likely to fall in love with!" Ino lowers her voice excitedly. "See, you aren't all that concerned about looks-"

"Hey!" Tenten frowns, offended.

"And if there's anyone I can trust to not fall in love, it'll be you, Tenten." Ino leans forward in her seat, glancing at Sakura and Hinata to gain their support.

Sakura nods; Hinata frowns. Tenten rubs her chin thoughtfully. "Only if you agree to pay rent for a month if I win the bet."

"Deal." Ino grabs her hand and pumps it, because she's the wealthiest among the group of them, not counting Hinata (and by extension, Neji). "You have two months to do this, girl."

Tenten sighs. She's going to have her work cut out for her - Hyuuga Neji has a reputation for being the heartbreaker, not the heartbroken.

* * *

_A/N: If anyone is interested in writing a continuation of this, go right ahead :)_


	30. Technology

_Came up with this idea while chatting with Yahboobeh ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Technology**

With the end of war came peace, and with peace came the onset of technology into the village of Konoha.

It was possibly because there had been so much going on - with the Akatsuki and the war - that there had not been time for the developments in the Daimyo's city to reach the _shinobi_ village until after things had settled down, and the task of rebuilding was mostly over with.

First came the clunky computers, surfaced with off-white plastic. It was as if the Daimyo had ordered the most backward equipment to be sent to Konoha first, to get people used to the idea that oblong boxes of metal could store information and compute data for them.

Then came the thin monitor screens and the heavy laptops, and every shinobi reporting to the Hokage's office stared in fascination at the little station in the corner of the room, where Shikamaru would sit and yawn and occasionally punch things into what they called a "keyboard".

Finally, the machinery evolved into a slim, sleek device by the time Naruto took over as Hokage, and by then, most of the younger generation knew how to operate a computer. Social media was the in-thing now - websites on which one could "add" one's acquaintances to one's "online profile", sites which enabled people to post short "status" updates about whatever they were doing at the moment, and even sites that functioned by having its users post photos instead of texts as "updates".

For all the insistence that he had no need for a machine to do his work for him, Might Gai was thoroughly swayed when he spied his rival, Kakashi, one day, staring fixedly at his laptop screen and chuckling (in a way that would strike everyone but Gai as) lecherously.

"Kakashi!" Gai bellowed, pushing his wheelchair into the empty dining hall. "What new challenge have you overcome?"

"Huh?" Kakashi looked blankly up at him, and lifted a hand in greeting. "Yo!"

"Always cool, my eternal rival! You have been doing something on that contraption!" Gai insisted when he drew close to his old friend, staring at him at eye-level. He looked intently at the back of the laptop, oblivious to the contents on its display. "Have you mastered the new technology?"

"Well, I..." Kakashi smiled his closed-eye smile and rubbed the back of his head.

"That's it, isn't it?" Gai continued, as if in an epiphany. "You have uncovered grand secrets and new techniques on what they call the 'entinet'!"

"Well, you could say that." Kakashi's hands flew to the keyboard the moment Gai made to wheel himself around for a good look at the screen; all the Green Beast saw was a photo of the old Team 7. (How had Kakashi put a photograph on his computer?)

Gai's brow furrowed. "This is horrifying," he exclaimed, "I shall not delay my ignorance any longer! My cute students shall teach me the secrets of the computer!"

Kakashi watched in faintly amused silence as his comrade wheeled himself away at inhuman speeds.

"Well," he said to himself, "I'm sure your students will delight in imparting information to you, Gai."

* * *

"No," Neji grit. "For the last time, a bookmark can be found if you click on the button at the top of the browser!"

"'Browser'?" Gai repeated, his bushy eyebrows knitting together. It was strange how he still retained that glossy head of jet-black hair despite his age. "'Click'?"

Neji heaved a long-suffering sigh. Couldn't Tenten be the one teaching their mentor for once?

"You hold the mouse-" At this juncture, Neji paused, and placed his hand on the small oval object on the desk. "And move it until the arrow on the screen hits whatever you want to look at. Then you click it once when you're clicking things on the internet, and twice when you're clicking folders to open them."

Gai absorbed the information with a frown, staring at the computer screen.

"It's best if you are inquisitive when you learn technology," Neji continued. He got to his feet, more than ready to leave. "Just don't destroy my computer."

"You can be assured that your computer is in the best hands, Neji!" Gai assured him with every ounce of confidence, and waved a thumbs-up at him.

"I'll be back soon." With that, Neji headed out of the study and into the kitchen, where Tenten was standing over the stove, stirring a pot of stew.

"How did it go?" she asked cheekily, her teeth flashing in a quick grin.

"As expected," he muttered. Neji crossed the kitchen in a few steps and wrapped his arms around her waist, nuzzling into her shoulder.

He bit lightly into her velvety skin; she gasped, released the ladle, and her eyes fluttered shut. "Neji-"

It didn't take much to distract her from the stove. They forgot about Gai and computers and food, when Neji's fingers wandered, and Tenten turned towards him, pulling him into a kiss.

At length, they broke apart, and she faced the stove, stirring her stew again.

"But I don't see why you can't be the one teaching him," Neji pointed out. "It's a pain."

Tenten leaned back into him, all warmth and malleability. "We drew lots, remember?"

Neji narrowed his eyes. "Why is it that whenever you and I draw lots, I'm always the one having to teach him?"

A giggle rumbled from her chest. "Beats me. Better luck next time, Neji."

He stared grudgingly at her. "At least let me cook while you attempt to teach him things like double-clicking and closing browser windows."

Tenten hummed for a little while. "Sure. I'll take over - it can't be that bad, can it?"

Neji opened his mouth to answer - at the same time Gai roared from the study.

"What is this? Neji, how could you?" There was some sputtering. "These- These women- And Tenten, our youthful flower! How could you fail Tenten like this?"

He realized his mistake a little too late.

Blood drained from his face. "On second thought," Neji blurted, "I'll handle this."

With a building sense of foreboding, Neji strode back into the study, hoping that his _sensei_ had not just poked into the deepest depths of his bookmarks folder.

If Gai could stand on both feet, he would have. As it was, he was pushing down on the armrests of his wheelchair with both hands and rising on his good leg. Fury blazed in his eyes.

"How could you keep your interest in other women?" the Green Beast growled, shoving a finger towards the screen. "Neji, I am disappointed in you."

Neji didn't have to glance at the screen to recognize the black background and flashing pictures of a porn site. He winced.

Why the hell had he decided to leave Gai alone?

"Tenten knows about it-" he fumbled uneasily, heat creeping up his cheeks.

"Speaking of Tenten!" Gai gesticulated wildly at the screen, and his own face turned red. "I saw- I saw pictures of- Of you and Tenten, Neji - as your former _sensei_, I am highly disgraced-"

"What?" Tenten squeaked behind him in the doorway. "Gai-_sensei_, what did you do?"

Gai sputtered, hardly looking at Tenten. Instead, he pointed at the computer. "What is the meaning of the pictures, Neji?"

"I..." Neji froze, embarrassed and guilty at the same time. Gai had to have found his way into the folder of pictures somehow - those of him and Tenten, that the public was most certainly not allowed to see.

"Neji!" Tenten squealed, mortified. "You- you-"

He glanced at her - her eyes were flicking between him, Gai, and the computer, and Tenten's natural reaction was to reach for the weapons pouch at her thigh.

"Not the computer," he muttered, mind churning for a way to get Gai out of here, as soon as possible.

"Tenten! How could you consent to allow Neji to- to defile your modesty?" Gai raged. He seemed to find solace in his anger, and Neji didn't blame him for it. Those were some very explicit pictures, after all.

"I have stew in the kitchen," Tenten announced loudly, her body stiff with tension. Her eyes were so wide that Neji could see the whites around her pupils, and he was certain he felt just as stressed as she did.

"Maybe we should visit Yamanaka," Neji suggested suddenly. The brilliance of the idea wasn't lost on Tenten; she perked up at once, and they exchanged a glance.

"What is the meaning of this?" Gai demanded. "Is she in on this too?"

Smoothly, Tenten slipped behind their mentor and pushed the tip of a _senbon_ into his neck.

They held their breaths and counted - five seconds later, Gai's eyes rolled up into the back of his head, and he collapsed back into his wheelchair, sedated.

Neji breathed a sigh of relief, pinching the bridge of his nose. "That was uncalled for."

"Well, it's your fault," Tenten snapped, glowering at him. "I can't believe he's seen those- those pictures of us! And I can't believe you convinced me to take them!"

"You were the one who convinced me to take them!" Neji retorted. He spared the monitor a glance, and reached forward to close the porn window. Tenten didn't bat an eyelid at that.

He did open the folder of pictures of him and Tenten, however, to see just how badly their _sensei_ had been scarred.

Behind him, Tenten groaned. "Not those pictures!"

They were a series of very lewd, very explicit pictures, with their faces in it, and Neji cringed.

"You should remove that bookmark," Tenten said. "Can't hurt to double-click a few times when I'm not around."

"Lee should teach him how to use the computer," Neji groused bitterly. "He has no business prying in our files."

"Last I heard, you were the one who told him to be inquisitive," she countered. He stared sullenly at her.

"How long does the sedative last?" Neji asked testily. "We don't need him announcing all of that down the streets."

"Another fifteen," Tenten answered, checking the wall clock. "I should pack some stew for Ino - she won't be happy about being interrupted in the middle of dinner."

Neji sighed again. "I hope that's enough for her to not use that material as blackmail."

Tenten shook her head, and headed out of the study. "We can only hope."

* * *

_A/N: ... poor Neji and Tenten. ;) Thank you to those who left reviews asking for a continuation of the coffee drabble last week.. I was actually asking if anyone else was interested in writing a continuation 'cause I'm not likely to at the moment. ;)_


	31. The Kinky Konoha

_This is another old one.. Written while wandering around in Singapore last year... Inspired by an Obama blow-up doll we saw in an adult toy store in Chinatown. ;)_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**The Kinky Konoha**

It is a warm, cloudy, dreary day. Tenten sighs behind the sales register of The Kinky Konoha, propping her chin up in her palms. No one ever comes into an adult toy store on a Tuesday afternoon, especially not when the heavens look as if they're on the verge of opening up.

Outside the shop, dark thunderclouds flash with hidden lightning.

She's done everything she possibly can, including vacuuming the carpeted floors, and straightening every damn gaudy box of vibrators there is to straighten. The dildos have meticulously been sorted according to color, size and material, and even the costumes have been restocked to her heart's content.

Fat raindrops are beginning to splash on the windows when a figure pauses hesitantly outside, surveying the storefront window displays.

For lack of something to do, Tenten turns her attention on the potential customer, perking up when he does a final check against his phone, and pushes the frosted glass door open.

"Welcome to The Kinky Konoha," she chirps the moment he steps in, with rain blowing through the door. It is a he, she knows, because the slender brows and narrowed pale eyes are distinctly masculine, and breathlessly regal. The long, ebony hair that falls past his shoulders only makes him that much more ethereal. Like a prince. Well, she's seen handsome guys and pretty ones, but none with eyes like his.

Tenten freezes in her spot when his slow scrutiny of the shop ends with a thorough examination of her person. It feels as if he's looking right through her with that one glance. "My name is Tenten," she stutters, giving him a weak grin. "Feel free to approach me if you have any questions."

The man nods (she realizes that his tailored suit hints at a very fine physique) and studies the colorful shelved products warily, with a crease on his smooth forehead, as if he's never seen such atrocities in his life. Tenten tries not to smile. It is especially amusing to ruffle the feathers of the uptight.

"Are you looking for something?" she probes, when he doesn't venture any further into the shop, merely looking over the shelves a second time. "We have items for individuals and couples, ladies and gentlemen... Or, if you're looking for something less vanilla..."

There is a dark shade of pink on his cheeks. He looks back at the smartphone in his hand, and back up at her. "I'm looking for a Tsunade doll," he finally says in a low, smooth voice, and Tenten blinks at him, momentarily stunned. Prince White Eyes is even sexier than she thought. Even if he's looking for a blow-up doll of the nation's first female president.

Everyone has to have a kink or two, right? She would never have pegged him as a blow-up doll kind of person, though.

"Well, the blow-up dolls are over here," she says, finally slipping off from her bar stool.

"Blow-up doll?" he repeats with another frown, following as she winds her way through the various shelves.

Tenten bites a smile down. He stops warily behind her when she pauses by the inflatable doll section. "This is a Tsunade doll," she informs him, pointing to a package at eye level, with a busty, bare-chested rendition of Konoha's leader. '_Find yourself in all her orifices,_' says a caption on the box.

Prince White Eyes stares incredulously at Tsunade's seductive smile. "I was under the impression that the Tsunade doll was some sort of action figurine," he mutters at length.

Tenten snorts. Really? "So, are you still interested in purchasing this?"

He frowns, looks back at the bright white display of his phone. "I guess I'll have to."

"Would you like me to check for defects before you make a payment?" Tenten pulls the first box off the shelf and shakes it at him.

The Prince frowns. "If you insist."

"Okay then." She brings the Tsunade doll back to the counter, slitting the plastic tape open. He follows reluctantly behind, watching as she fishes an air pump from one of the lower shelves. The folded inflatable doll slides easily out of the box and plastic wrapper, and she spreads Tsunade's nude, folded limbs out, finding the air valve behind her neck.

Prince White Eyes turns away after a while, when Tsunade's open, painted lips and pink womanly bits prove too much for him. Tenten lifts her eyebrows, but makes no mention of it. "This is a new model," she does say, "She's one of the new silicone dolls we brought in recently - minimal wash-up, works best with water-based lubes. The orifices are-"

"This purchase is not for me!" he snaps uncomfortably, adjusting his collar.

Her eyebrows crawl up her forehead. "Oh."

(Oops.)

Prince White Eyes seems to hesitate for a moment, before allowing, "My younger cousin... She requested it."

Tenten smiles. He must have one hell of a younger cousin, then, to push him so far out of his element. (There is no doubt that the Prince is way out of his comfort zone right now.) She gestures to the doll when it is fully inflated, looking toward the Prince. "Would you like to check for visual defects yourself? To make sure your... cousin will be fine with this?"

He reluctantly drags his pale eyes over the Tsunade doll, disdain etched into his face, and turns it gingerly over, to inspect the doll's behind. "This will work."

"Okay then." Tenten grins and begins deflating the doll, replacing it within its packaging when she's done. "Is there anything else you'd like? We have a range of products suited for ladies or people like yourself-"

"That'll be all," he interrupts curtly, handing her a card from his wallet. Konoha Express. A card for the rich, right there. Tenten raises her eyebrows again. She isn't surprised to learn that he's Hyuuga Neji, from the (infamous) Hyuuga Enterprises.

The transaction goes through smoothly, and Tenten hands a discreet black bag and the card back to him.

"See you again," she tells him cheerfully, when he turns to leave without so much as a thank you.

"I don't plan on returning," he answers, stepping towards the door.

And the heavens split open right then, emptying buckets upon buckets of rainwater against the shop front. Tenten tries unsuccessfully to choke her snort down. There is no way Hyuuga Neji is going to get his designer suit drenched, is there?

He looks accusingly at her, and she purses her lips, spinning around to hide her amusement. He is still standing feet away from the door that separates them from the downpour when she turns to see if he's gone; he frowns at her.

"Well, we don't sell umbrellas," she informs him, almost (but not quite) apologetically. "But if you'd like to have a latex suit for the rain, we have that in your size-"

The look he's giving her now is a peculiar cross between horror and indignation. "I don't need anything of that sort."

Well, if he's never returning... "Then I guess you'll be either braving the storm or seeking shelter among the dildos and vibrators," Tenten suggests. "Who knows, you might find something you're really interested in."

He narrows his eyes at her.

"The Flesh Tunnel is really popular with guys, you know," she suggests, pointing towards another shelf, where a number of forearm-length cylinders are lined up. "Silicone interior, easy clean-up. Some say it's even better than a woman."

He yields a curious look back at the Flesh Tunnels, frowns at the depictions of skimpily-dressed women on their packaging, and turns away. "I really need to be leaving."

"They're really effective, those Flesh Tunnels," Tenten continues, sensing a potential sale. Besides, it doesn't seem as if he's parked his car anywhere nearby. "Squirt some lube in there and go to town with it. It'll be better than all your girlfriends combined."

Hyuuga Neji looks sullenly at her.

"Oh... You don't have a girlfriend?" she realizes belatedly. Then again, with that stiff attitude of his, she isn't surprised. Maybe he isn't all that great with sex, either.

"It'll feel better than you, wouldn't it?" he asks dryly, glancing between her and the shelves of Flesh Tunnels.

Tenten flushes a deep red. Well, sure, customers have made lewd propositions to her before, though none as sexy and beautiful as the Hyuuga. "Well, um," she sputters, thrown off-guard. "Wouldn't you like to find out."

(He doesn't have to know that she's kinda rubbish with sex herself.)

Hyuuga Neji remains studying her contemplatively, looking over her slowly, as if stripping her with his eyes. Tenten thinks her cheeks are so hot that they're probably glowing a bright fuchsia.

"Perhaps," he eventually yields, and Tenten gapes at him.

"Are you for real?" she gasps, goggling. Prince Hyuuga is actually willing to consider sex with her?

He looks at her for a few moments longer. "I don't see why not."

(She doesn't, either.)

"Well, you must be pretty desperate," she comments, "If you're willing to resort to blow-up dolls and cashiers."

"I've told you, that purchase is not for me," he snaps, turning back to the door, where fat raindrops are still smashing themselves into clear rivulets. "This is a waste of time."

"No!" she yelps, unwilling to lose her only customer (and his company).

Hyuuga Neji pauses at the exit, looking back at her with cool, pale eyes. "Is something the matter?"

"Yes! Um, no!" she fumbles, looking at the register and the rest of the store in mortification. "Just thought you might like to, um, take our business card with you. You know, in case your, um, cousin might like more products in the future."

His gaze turns calculating. The man takes a moment to decide on something, and steps back towards the counter purposefully, seeking the stack of business cards. She grabs one and hands it to him. He's just about a couple feet away from her, and she sees clearly the clean lines of his jaw, and the paleness of his irises.

"Your name isn't on here," he says, after scanning the gaudy card.

She stares at him, shrugs. "I'm just a sales assistant."

He hasn't looked away from her. "Your name?"

Tenten blinks. Is he serious? "What price are you willing to pay for that information?" she asks, slyly. Coffee would be nice. Or enough sales to earn her a tidy commission.

He smirks at her. "Name your price."

"Well, you can't be all that interested," she teases, a little flutter in her chest. Can he?

"How do I prove it, then?" He steps towards the counter, not quite leaning against it.

"Pick a toy of your choice and give it some serious consideration," she tells him with a grin. "No purchase necessary, but you'd have to hold it and imagine using it."

He raises a slender eyebrow. "Not the typical female, I see."

Her grin widens. "Hey, if I can't nail dinner, I want some commission off a purchase, at least."

Hyuuga Neji graces her with another smirk. "I did not rule dinner out of the question."

Tenten jerks her chin at the rest of the store. "First, consider a toy."

"On it." The man turns away, scanning the contents of the shop. He seems to be less unnerved by the products as time passes by, she realizes. Tenten watches as he makes a beeline towards the dildos, pulling one out, seemingly at random. She blinks. Is he into men? (She wouldn't doubt it, with his fine features and long, silky hair.) He heads back towards her, placing his chosen box on the counter.

Before she can think up a comment, he's looking meaningfully between her and the dildo. "For your consideration," Neji tells her pointedly, and walks away.

She realizes that the silicone toy is of his exact skin tone - pale, and not absurdly-sized. Tenten gulps, stares. He can't possibly mean- Can he? She looks between his retreating back and the very realistic body part, and considers it the way he probably meant her to. It's a delicious thought. Heat pools in her belly.

Hyuuga Neji sure doesn't beat around the bush, does he?

He returns shortly after with a wrapped set of handcuffs, and raises his brow in question. "Well?"

"That should be my line," she informs him with an easy smile. "Are you getting the handcuffs?"

"Only if you're interested in that, ah, specimen," he replies, in his smooth baritone, looking back at the dildo he's left. "What did you think of it?"

She blushes again. "Well, I wouldn't say no to it. What did you mean by leaving it here?"

Hyuuga Neji cracks a tiny smile, and sets the handcuffs on the counter. Tenten doesn't like that she can't read him as easily as he does her. "Your name," he reminds her.

"Fine, fine. I'm Tenten," she finally yields. "And you're Neji."

He inclines his head. "I'm interested in the handcuffs if you're interested in those... dimensions."

She gulps under his intent stare, glances at the dildo, and blushes harder yet. (Yes, she is very interested indeed.) "And if I said yes?"

"I possess too many morals not to ask you to dinner first," he says primly, looking her over. "The handcuffs will be for another time."

Another time? She stares at him. Gestures towards the handcuffs. "Are- are you buying this, then?"

"Yeah." He pulls his credit card back out, the corner of his lips quirking. "Are you free for dinner this Friday evening?"

"Yeah, sure." She looks owlishly at him. "My time is in high demand, you know."

"I'll make it worth your while," he assures, with an intent look at her, sliding the card back into his wallet when the transaction is complete. Tenten opens and shuts her mouth, lost for words, and Neji chooses then to glance out of the shop front. The rain has stopped just as suddenly, as if it meant for the exchange to happen between them. "Guess it's time for me to leave."

He scribbles something on a white card he pulls from his pocket, flips it around. Tenten realizes that it's his name card. It looks more expensive than the birthday cards she gets in the mail.

"Get in touch with me," he tells her, grabbing his second bag from where she's placed it on the counter.

He breezes out the door quicker than he made his entrance, and Tenten stares disbelievingly at the name card, flipping it over to find neat penmanship in black ink. She swallows hard, and pockets the card.

_Hope you enjoy being tied down._


	32. Tent-Space

_This was inspired by the 10-cubicle, 20-person tent that is apparently on sale at Walmart. O_O An older piece written a few months ago. :P_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Tent-Space**

The night air of Suna was cool and dry, and would have been utterly silent, if it weren't for the eighteen other people sharing the tent with them.

Neji frowned, sitting cross-legged in their little cubicle on one end of the mother tent, his lips pulled into a thin line. "I can't sleep like this."

In the space of the three feet before him, Tenten had already stretched out on her stomach, peering excitedly through the plastic-sheet window at the head of their shared space. "Is it really that bad?" she asked lightly. "I'm glad for the privacy we've been given as it is."

"What privacy?" Neji's forehead crinkled further.

With the Great War over, there had been a huge rush to rebuild destroyed towns and homes, and scarcely had any of the Konoha 11 returned to their village when they'd been dispatched immediately to Suna to aid in the reconstruction work there.

Hence, the tent.

Yamato-_sensei_ had been retained in Konoha for obvious purposes; thus, he was not around to build them all a wood shelter to retreat into when the day's work was over.

Instead, Kakashi had sent them along with a majestic tent that someone had found in a storage room somewhere. It had been declared the greatest invention of its time - a single elephantine tent, with five cubicles on each side separated by a narrow walkway. Its construction and disassembly was surprisingly simple. (It wasn't lightweight, however, and Akamaru had been assigned the task of transporting it during the three-day journey to Suna.)

Neji didn't know how it was that he and Tenten ended up in the same tent cubicle together (well, he did know, but he faked his ignorance), and was grateful that he could share the narrow space with his female teammate and best friend, instead of being shoved around by Lee's sprawled legs whenever the latter fell into a deep sleep.

He did not appreciate the noise so close to them, however.

"Oh come on, let's get to sleep already," Tenten teased, her voice lilting. She nudged him with a foot. "We're starting on the reconstruction tomorrow, you know."

"I do know," he answered. A few feet away, Naruto and Kiba and Lee were parading around somewhere, yelling, and the background noises annoyed him to no end.

"Neji," Tenten whined. She did so smilingly, tapping his knee with a finger, and Neji swallowed. "Come to bed."

"What?" he choked, heat flaring in his cheeks. (Sure, his thoughts had drifted when he orchestrated their sharing the tent cubicle, but _Tenten_ had just asked him to join her _in bed_.)

Like he hadn't thought about it about a million times before.

"It gets cold at night here," she told him, still with a smile, patting the bumpy floor next to her. "And I'm cold."

He couldn't deny her. So Neji clicked the hanging bulb above them off, and shuffled so he lay down beside her, facing the ceiling.

The cubicle was a little narrow (or was Tenten stretched out to occupy as much space as possible?) and her body pressed against his side, warmth sinking into his skin.

"I wish the window were a little clearer," she said wistfully, staring out. "The desert sky is all starry at night."

He shrugged next to her. "You're welcome to go out and look at them."

She squirmed forward and fumbled around, and in the next moment, her delighted gasp filled the air. "There's a zip on the window!"

Neji listened as she unzipped the tent window by a fraction and peered out, sighing at the sights before her.

He tried very hard not to look at the swell of her bottom next to his face.

Sure, they were teammates who had spent plenty of time in close proximity. Sure, Tenten trusted him to be honorable.

But being in the war and facing his own mortality had taught him that he only lived once... and that there was no time to be a coward if he was interested in her.

It still wasn't a good idea to be addressing her butt, however.

So Neji waited.

Tenten seemed to think nothing about spending half an hour gazing at the stars, though, and he was growing more impatient the longer he soaked in her warmth. Sounds of partying served only to drag out every passing second.

"Tenten," he said at length, if a little restlessly.

"Hmm?" she looked back at him, her face barely lit by the campfire somewhere out of his sight.

He touched her bare calf with the back of his finger, drawing it up the length of her leg, so there really could be no way to misinterpret his intentions.

Her breath hitched, and she was silent.

"Neji?" she whispered after a while.

"What do you think of..." At this juncture, he trailed away, rehearsed lines falling off the sides of his suddenly-dry tongue. Lots of other inappropriate things came to mind, like_What do you think of me breathing next to your skin_, or _Would you like it if I sucked on your throat_, or What do you think of us mak-

"Of?" She squirmed back down and turned, to look at him at eye-level, even though he could hardly see any of her in the darkness, save for the vague outlines of her face.

He leaned in and kissed her, where he thought her mouth was. Instead, he landed between her nose and mouth, and she inhaled quickly, then giggled. He pulled away in embarrassment.

"Oh, Neji," Tenten whispered, and when she drew close, their lips met more-or-less perfectly.

Neji groaned; her mouth was soft and warm and inviting, and he rolled her beneath himself, slanting his lips over hers to kiss her thoroughly, his pulse thundering in his ears.

She whimpered - her hands came up to cradle his cheeks, to wind through his hair, and he couldn't help propping himself up on one elbow to slowly touch her jaw and throat, and then her collarbones, and the gentle swells of her breasts.

A sharp gasp fell from her lips; Tenten arched herself towards him, and Neji caught her whimper with his mouth, when the kiss deepened unexpectedly.

His hand had found its way under her shirt, under her bra, and the skin there was silky-smooth, even as her nipples pebbled and strained beneath his fingertips.

He felt himself grow hard, felt her spread her legs for him, and he ground into her, moaning at the pleasure that echoed through his flesh.

"Neji," she mewled again, sifting her hands over his chest, and further down. He thrust into her palm when she found him through his clothes, moaning into her mouth, willing her to touch him more intimately.

There was vague loud conversation in the background, some of it drunken, but Neji was in no mood to care, especially not when he'd broken away from Tenten's lips and licked his way down her neck, and pushed her shirt up to taste her nipples.

She moaned when he lapped at them, stiff peaks that responded to the slightest touch, and he reached into her pants, brushing over the cotton of her panties. Tenten parted her legs wider, pleaded softly when he skimmed his fingers over damp fabric. He couldn't wait, and slipped them past the elastic band, loving the way she gasped, slick flesh parting between his fingertips. "Ne-"

Her calloused fingers wound around his bare flesh somehow, tugging on him, and Neji groaned, unable to move for a moment as he savored the sensations that Tenten was gifting him, with her small, eager hand-

"Hey, there's someone in here fucking!" a too-familiar voice yelled outside their flimsy tent door.

They froze in panic, jerking inches away from each other, though he hadn't quite withdrawn his hand from her pants, and Tenten hadn't relinquished her grip on him, either.

The same person smacked their zipped tent door rudely with a snicker, and the unmistakable sounds of more people crowding around the outside of their cubicle made Neji tense.

It suddenly struck him that he was facing Tenten for the first time since touching her like that, and he winced, unsure how she would react to this, to him reaching into her clothes like that.

"Ten-" he muttered, even as the crowd cheered encouragingly through the weave of their little room.

"Fuck her," some unruly masculine voices ordered.

"Fuck him," came the female equivalent.

Neji felt his cheeks burn. He did not need to be told what to do, and neither did Tenten, even if he was almost certain that their night would end with exactly what their spectators suggested.

"Oh, for heaven's sake!" Tenten hissed, releasing Neji (he wasn't sure he wanted that) and fumbling around.

In the next moment, he heard the whistle of several _senbon_ flying through the air and piercing through durable fabric, and surprised yelps sounded from the other side of the tent as people scattered, having not anticipated the attack.

"You just gave our identities away," Neji hissed in mortification.

"By the end of tonight, I would have fucked you," she whispered back, "And what would they have to say about that?"

His entire face was scorching, and Neji was at a loss for words. He hadn't expected _Tenten_ to be that vulgar. He blinked several times, still unable to see in the dark, and felt her relax beneath him when the mutters of the crowd died down.

Come to think of it, there really was nothing to be afraid of if people knew that he and Tenten had had sex. It wasn't like he was intending to sleep with anyone else, and some of their comrades needed to get laid more than he did.

Scratch that.

_He_ needed to get laid.

So he thought back to the words Tenten said, and felt a smirk creep up his lips. "By the end of tonight," he repeated, "You would have fucked me, you said?"

She drew a sharp intake of breath beneath him, and his lips quirked further. He could see her flushed cheeks very clearly in his mind.

"Yes, I'm going to fuck you, Hyuuga Neji," she muttered.

The next thing he knew, she'd gripped his collar with both her hands, and flipped him onto his back.

Her hips ground into his. Neji groaned, reaching down for her, and as she leaned in and bit him lightly on the shoulder, her hands undoing his robes, he decided that he really didn't care what went on outside their little bubble tonight.

* * *

_A/N: Pfftt :P_


	33. Herring Soba

_This is a pretty old one, posted on Tumblr a very long time ago. ;) _

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**Herring Soba**

"Tenten, why are we walking on noodles?" Neji looks around them in bewilderment. They are climbing a giant noodle mountain - layers upon layers of soba noodles, with no end in sight.

"This is my birthday present to you!" she chirps brightly.

Neji's forehead wrinkles. "It's not my birthday anytime soon."

She grins, her chocolate eyes twinkling. "I know. That's why it's a surprise, see? You were totally not expecting it."

He stares speechlessly at her. "Do you expect me to consume this?" he finally asks, looking at the noodles they're walking on.

Tenten does not reply, but points upwards instead, to the peak of the mountain. To his horror, Neji sees a gigantic waterfall of clear brown broth pouring down from a hole in the clouds, right onto the summit of the soba mountain.

"We'll get washed away!" he shouts, at the same time Tenten exclaims, "Isn't that amazing?"

She grabs his hand and Neji has little choice but to follow; she jumps high into the air, pulling him along, and they land on the surge of broth as it rushes downwards, over the lines and bumps of what is possibly a thousand tons of noodles.

It's all he can do to maintain their original spot on the soba mountain; Neji pushes _chakra_ in his feet to stay afloat, and they sprint upwards, with seemingly no progress at all.

"Why are we even doing this?" Neji snaps. This is one hell of a birthday present.

"It's not over yet! Tenten replies, and looks over her shoulder, to the horizon.

A huge, dark shape is approaching them, too dense and trapezoidal to be a mere rain cloud.

"What is that?" Neji gasps, still running on the never-ending flow of broth.

"It's a piece of herring!" Tenten answers in delight, running and watching the dark shape at the same time.

"It's going to crash into us!" Neji realizes.

"It's your birthday present!" she squeals.

He doesn't know how to get out of this mess - maybe they could ride the current down to avoid being squashed by the slab of meat- But Tenten holds him in place, and Neji watches with dread as the looming shape casts a dark shadow upon them.

There isn't any time to escape anymore. He leaps into the air and executes a perfect _kaiten_ as the heavy slab of herring descends upon them, drilling a hole right through feet and feet of fish.

"You saved us!" Tenten informs him cheerfully, when Neji emerges on top of the slab of herring with her, a hole tunneled clean through for their escape.

The slab of herring is heavy enough to withstand the currents of the broth waterfall, and Neji watches as broth flows around the fish, gurgling and splashing.

"Is this it?" he asks Tenten warily. The smell of herring soba is overpowering, and now that they've stopped their mad sprint, he thinks he's feeling quite hungry, after all.

"Yes!" Tenten grins. "And because it's your birthday, you'll need to finish all of this!"

She throws her arms into the air, and Neji gapes.

They end up eating until they're full to bursting, and there's barely a dent in the fish, or the noodles, or the broth.

"I think I've had enough," he mumbles, feeling a little sick.

"You can't be serious!" Tenten smiles, thrusts a piece of fish at him with her chopsticks.

Hyuuga Neji wakes with a start, and finds Tenten by his bedside, bowl of steaming noodles in hand.

"That isn't herring soba, is it?" he asks warily. They've had enough to last a lifetime.

"It is! It's your favorite, isn't it?" Tenten grins, and Neji gulps. "Happy birthday, by the way! I made extra for you!"

He pinches the bridge of his nose. Maybe he should go back to sleep, and wake up in a reality without the existence of fish and noodles. A mountain of noodles is more than enough for a lifetime.


	34. eggs and papers

_This was written very recently, to reflect where I am currently in writing :) I've been talking about writing and plot and character development on tumblr, but haven't really done anything to show for it, so here you go! Inspired by _FarenMaddox_'s _Without Knowing How, Or When, Or From Where_, which is a TRC AU that breathes life into characters like whoa._

_Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/Happy New Year!_

_Naruto and its characters do not belong to me._

* * *

**eggs and papers**

It's one of those days, when it's all grey out the window and it's cold, but not cold enough to justify turning the radiator on. Tenten sighs, wheels herself to her chest of drawers (mahogany, worn, but a gift and thus precious), where she pulls a shawl out of the second-to-last drawer, wraps it around herself.

The apartment smells like coffee; it is otherwise quiet. She pauses by her bedroom door, pushes on one wheel so the chair does a quarter backward turn, swings the door open, and makes her way down the corridor connecting the rooms.

When she turns into the kitchen, her flatmate is already at the table, reading the newspapers he's holding up with one hand. The other hand cradles a steaming mug. She grins at him, he cracks a smile, and they go back to their morning routines. Tenten collects her frying pan first, sets it on her lap, and the eggs and butter from the fridge go into that. With that done, she rolls along to the stove, sets the pan down, turns the heat on. A slice of butter goes in next, and the eggs sit by the side.

Three feet away, Neji continues to read his papers, as if ignorant of what she's doing.

She knows that's far from the truth, and she appreciates it. For how much he resents Lee for causing the scar tissue on her back and legs, he still respects her independence, respects the way she wants to continue living her life, wheelchair-bound or no.

Tenten hums as the butter melts. She has to strain forward to look, and sit straighter, but this is her life now, and she knows she's stronger than whining about things she can't change. So, she cracks her eggs when the butter starts to foam, and grabs her mug from one of the lower cabinets.

"Working early today?" Neji asks, one eyebrow quirked.

"Nah. Just gotta head to the post office first. Beat the crowd and all that."

"Ah."

The kitchen is filled with sounds of newspapers flipping and eggs sizzling, and Tenten closes her eyes and smiles, leaning back in her chair. There are simple things in life worth appreciating. Mornings with Neji are one of those.


End file.

Naruto, Romance