Kim Possible Mutual of Saginaw's Wild Suburban

**Mutual of Saginaw's Wild Suburban**

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**A/N: **_What are two zanny animal show stars doing hunting Shego. Base on a popular animal show of the early 70s._

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**Disclaimer:**_ All characters of Kim Possible are own by Disney and Mr.Bob and Mr.Mark( Anytime with that deal guys) All other characters,vagabonds,thugs,geeks,hoolums,lawyers,carpitbaggers,scalliwaggs and ummmm... oh yea! Mace and Neo are property of the respective authors( and they know who they are). Me no profit,me have fun._

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**A/N Forward:**_ This story is dedicated to the late Marlin Perkins and Jim Fowler for one of the most wonderful Sunday night shows I had even watched. And to the late Johnny Carson who has made Jim Fowler a butt for some of his jokes._

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Hello, I'm Roland Gerkins, and welcome to Mutual of Saginaw's Wild Suburban. The Caribbean Islands...home of some of the most exotic animals of the planet. But one of the most rarest creatures on this island is the one me and my partner, Jay Fowlmore, will be trying to capture and tag today on our show... the elusive Shego.

We arrived late that afternoon on a Tuesday. It is on this island where the elusive Shego was last spotted. I was setting up camp while Jay was going over his capture weapons. Jay had the usual weapons he like for this safari. They included a dart rifle, rope, capture net, electric cattle prod and of course a tag and transmitter for keeping tabs on her.

We walked about a mile though a clearing in the trees when we spotted a herd of the red-hooded henchmen.We both wondered how something that big can be so dumb? You have to admit, they were not the sharpest tools in the shed.And the appetite of these henchmen are ferocious.Just look on how one of them savages attacks a pile of mexican food next to him.

Then all of a sudden a strange noise came from one them followed by a most pungent oder. This happens among the henchmen from time to time.

" Woo Lux man, lay off the bean tacos will you?" said a henchman while he and the other henchmen were wave there hands around.

" How would you like to capture and tag one of them Jay?"

" Not worth my time Roland. Anyway, I don't think they will be extinct anytime soon."

" Well I don't know about extinct but I know one of them stink."

We walked about another 500 yards over the next sand dune and there she was…the elusive Shego. She was laying on a beach chair, soaking up the sun in nothing more than a two-piece bikini.

After putting Jay's eyes back into his head and tongue back in his mouth I had to remind him of our mission out here.

" Get your head in the game Jay. Now we will both circle around the dune here. You go around back with the electric cattle prod and give her a good poke. When she jumps up I'll hit her once with a dart so to put her out before she started attacking you. When you yell three we will go together."

As I got to the front of the dune to raise up to take aim, I notice I made one mistake….I forgot to pack the darts with me.

As I got a 50 yard head start running for the tent, that is when Jay jumped up on three and gave Shego a good jout of 500 volts with the cattle prod. A nest of wet hornets had nothing on the look in Shego's eyes as she spotted Jay and the cattle prod in his hand.

" Ok Roland, now!..Roland?…Roland?...Ok…joke's over Roland…ROLAND!"

While Jay is outside getting his butt handed to him by Shego we will sit here in 6 inch thick titanium tent and have tea and crumpets.Time now for a comercal break.

"ROLAND ! NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR A COMERCAL BREAK,AWWW!"

Do you have life insurance? Me and Jay have excellent coverage thur The Mutual of Saginaw's Life Insurance Company.

"ROLAND I COULD USE YOUR HELP ABOUT NOW,OHHH!"

"My family took out a million dollar policy on me just last year. And for Jay,who has no family, I took out a two million dollar policy out on him before the show tonight. And from what I see outside I might be collecting on that very soon too. Jay, you don't need to make her anymore aggressive."

"ME? MAKING HER AGGRESSIVE? GET YOU WRINKY OLD BUTT OUT HERE AND HELP ME ROLAND."

"Sorry Jay but the writers on the show don't want the host getting hurt. That is why they hired you. Besides, you're a low insurance risk to them anyways."

" NOW YOU TELL ME?..NO,NO..NOT THERE ! "

" So remember for all your insurance needs, turn to Mutual of Saginaw. Now let us see how Jay is doing."

As I step outdooor I found Jay laying there looking like he was in a 5 car accident. His eyes seem to be lighting up. And I can see why too.

" Jay, I don't think that cattle prod belongs up there."

" Good observation Roland."

As I was helping Jay, I happen to hear the simple sweet cries that can only come from the wonderfully elusive Shego.

" DRAKKEN ! PACK IT UP , WE'RE MOVING, NOW, BEFORE KIMMIE AND THE BUFFOON GET HERE."

"And so ends another episode.Tune in next week ladies and gentlemen as we explore the inhabitants of Middleton on Mutual of Saginaw's Wild Suburban."

" Jay, you might want to get some ice on that."

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**A/N: **_Singing: It's flame the Captain time, it's flame the Captain time. That's right everybody! Send in the review time is here. Let me know.. could this be a multi-chapter story or should I give it to Rufus to line his litter-box with? And as always we thank you for your support._


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Kim Possible, Humor