Ouran High School Host Club 1. Where is she?

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT own Ouran High School Host Club. That is the genius of Bisco Hatori. The only things I own are all of the manga's, a love of the characters, and a desire to be Haruhi. If I were Mori would be mine! (And if he turned me down I'd go after Kyoya) Heeheehee **

A/N: I was introduced very late to the wonderful world of Ouran, so I am not even sure if anyone is still reading these, but I wanted to write a fanfic for the person who introduced me to this awesome anime. Tiffany, you're as sweet as Hunny-Senpai. Since you love the twins so much, this one's for you!

Kaoru walked through the halls of Ouran University with his twin brother Hikaru. It was hard to believe they were nearing the end of their first semester.

"Where is Haruhi?" Hikaru said. "She said she'd meet us at 8:00am outside the Library so where is she?"

Kaoru glanced at his watch. "It's only 8:02, Hikaru. She probably got stuck in a long line at the café getting her tea. She'll be here."

"But it's past time for her to be here," Hikaru complained still searching the halls for her.

Kaoru sighed at his brother's grumblings. Hikaru never had much patience. He had even less when it came to waiting for Haruhi. Especially since they began dating. Kaoru thought about that night three months ago when his brother burst in their bedroom door shouting, "Haruhi is mine, Kaoru, she's finally mine." Apparently when Hikaru took Haruhi to the amusement park he got up the nerve to kiss her on the Ferris wheel. Before dropping her off at her house he asked her to be his girlfriend and even though she had said no in the past this time she had said yes.

Kaoru could still remember the shock he felt that night. To some degree he still felt it. Over three years ago he had stepped aside to ensure his brothers happiness, but Haruhi had rejected him. He would never admit it out loud but there was a small part of him that breathed a sigh of relief at Haruhis rejection. As much as he wanted to see Hikaru happy he loved Haruhi too and so he decided that it was better if they all just stayed friends. It was working well for them all too until three months ago when Haruhi accepted Hikarus request and changed the dynamics of their relationship.

"Where is she?" Hikaru growled his impatience growing.

Kaoru spotted her at the far end of the hallway. He almost grabbed Hikaru's arm to point her out when an uncharacteristic bit of selfishness stopped him. He wanted to savor this moment before Hikaru claimed her all to himself. His heart stopped in his chest. She was beautiful. Her hair touched her shoulders now, and her chest was twice the size it had been in their first year of high school. Although since she was as flat as an ironing board back then twice the size still only made her a B cup. Still they suited her since everything about her was tiny. She drew closer giving him a better glimpse of the skintight Hitachiin jeans she was wearing. Those jeans showed off the dip in her waist and the slight flare of her tiny hips. She had on a tight fitting red sweater that accentuated her chest in a mouth watering way. Her black leather ankle boots could faintly be heard in the distance. Dressed from head to toe in Hitachiin she looked like every other rich kid who graced the halls of Ouran Academy but she wasn't she was a commoner who happened to be best friends with the sons of the top fashion designer in Japan. They've been trying for years to get her to dress in their clothes but once she became Hikaru's girlfriend there was no stopping their mother. Even Haruhi had to relent.

He could look at her forever and die a happy man but sensing Hikaru's discomfort he shrugged off his selfish moment and remembered to share.

"Here she comes," he said pointing toward her. Unfortunately he pointed her out just as some guy was approaching her from the side. Uh-oh, this was not going to go over too well.

"Who the hell is that?" Hikaru growled as he headed toward his girlfriend. Hoping to keep Hikaru calm Kaoru decided to follow.

Hikaru was pissed as he watched some guy eyeing his girl up and down. Who the hell was this guy and what right did he think he had to leer at Haruhi?

"Hey, Gorgeous," he said as he wrapped himself around her pressing his body close to hers. Kaoru putting an arm around her shoulder and kissed her cheek.

"Hey, guys," she said as she tried to return Hikaru's hug but found that she couldn't move.

"Who's this?" Hikaru asked as he nuzzled into her cheek his arms still wrapped around her tiny waist. He frowned as she struggled to get out of his tight embrace. '_Oh, Haruhi, you should know better than that,_' he thought as he held her firmer against him. After more than three years of his arms around her she should be used to it by now but Haruhi was not one for public displays of affection. _'Too bad,' _he thought. With this guy hanging around she was just going to have to endure it.

"This is Takigawa-kun. He's in my criminal justice class. This is Hikaru and Kaoru," she said gesturing to each twin in turn.

"So, twins huh?" He asked eyeing the both of them on each side of her.

'_Yeah,' _Hikaru thought._ 'You're a freaking genius_.'

"Yup. Identical twins. Only Haruhi can tell us apart without fall," Kaoru said.

"Really? I shouldn't be surprised you seem like very close….friends," Takigawa said.

"Well, Kaoru and Haruhi are very close friends but me and Haruhi are much more than that," Hikaru said followed by running his mouth up the side of her neck.

"Hikaru," Haruhi whispered trying in vain to put some space between them.

"What?" Hikaru asked innocently. "We are." He looked at Takigawa. "She's my girlfriend."

"Ah," Takigawa said. "Well my next class is about to start so let me know when we can get together."

"Get together?" Hikaru asked bristling in her arms. "Didn't you just hear me? Haruhi's my girl."

"Yeah, I heard you but we have a project to work on so I'll be borrowing her for a little bit."

Hikaru narrowed his eyes on this guy who smirked when he talked about 'borrowing' her.

"Call me, Fujioka-san." And with that he walked away.

"Call me? Since when do you have this guys number?" he said pulling away from her to look at her face.

"He put it in my phone this morning so we could get together for our project. It's our final term grade so it needs to be perfect."

Hikaru frowned at that. Just how time consuming was this project going to be. Just how much of her time was this guy going to 'borrow.'" Jealousy burned through him at the thought of this guy leering at his girl for hours. He backed her up a few steps until she was pressed against the wall then he pressed his lips roughly to hers.

"Hikaru," she said pushing him away slightly. "Stop, we're in the hall way."

He smirked at the adorable blush that flushed her cheeks and bridge of her nose.

"So what. Who cares about anyone else," he said and pressed another one on her.

Kaoru frowned at his brother's actions. Didn't he care at all about making Haruhi uncomfortable? Hoping to help her he glanced at his watch and elbowed Hikaru in the back. "Let's go, Romeo, class is about to start."

His brother pulled away. The three of them walked toward their next class. Kaoru never really liked math but he didn't mind it now since it was one of the classes the three of them had together. Haruhi was so embarrassed she kept her eyes on the floor not really paying attention to where she was walking. The hallways suddenly flooded with a group of students headed their way. Haruhi got swept away by the crowd. Hikaru turned to his left panicking that she was no longer beside him.

"Gah, where's Haruhi? Where is she? Where is she, Kaoru?" he asked whipping his head in every direction. "Kaoru, where is she?"

"Calm down, Hikaru she just got carried down the hall way a bit. I'm sure she's making her way back as we speak."

"Haruhi." Hikaru pushed through the throng of people ignoring their complaints as he shouldered them aside to get to her. When he did he pulled her in a death grip. "Mmmmm, Haruhi," he sighed as he rocked her back and forth looking about as relieved as Kaoru had ever seen him.

Kaoru frowned. This reminded him of how Hikaru acted when they had been separated for a short time during the bravery contest that Halloweeen in high school. That was three years ago. Kaoru thought Hikaru had done a lot of growing in that time but now he wondered.

One of the biggest reasons he did not pursue Haruhi was so that his brother could expand his world, expand his wings and fly. But now it seems that the only change in Hikaru was that he traded his dependency on him for his dependency on Haruhi.

Looking at her now Kaoru almost gasped out loud. She looked smothered, troubled. How had he not noticed the changes in her since she started dating his brother? Perhaps because he saw her everyday, the changes happening slowly subtly, but there was no denying them now. Her jeans were not as skintight as they used to be indicating that she might have lost a few pounds. That was something the tiny girl couldn't afford to do. Her eyes were sad, there were dark circles under her eyes. They were faint but they were there. And her smile. Her smile was so strained. This time Kaoru did gasp softly. It was the same smile she used when she was enduring Tamaki's unwanted embrace. Was she unhappy with Hikaru? Was he smothering her? He wasn't sure Hikaru's dependency was a good thing for either one of them.

Kaoru wondered when he became so blind to Haruhi's feelings. To her well being. She meant everything to him. He was going to have to start paying closer attention to her. This relationship may not be a good thing, and that was not just his selfish side talking.

A/N (again) This is my first fanfic, so please be nice. As I said not sure if anyone is still reading these but if you are sorry about the slow start I swear it gets better (at least I think so) So stick with me. Any comments would be appreciated. Arigato.


	2. Mine

**Disclaimer: I have already mentioned that I do not own Ouran High School Host Club. That honor belongs to Bisco Hatori. Please don't remind me that all rights and profits belong to someone else. It's too depressing. ;)**

A/N: Thank you so much to those who have viewed and reviewed. Your input and encouragement is really appreciated. Special thanks to Quirkista go check out her Hikaru/Haruhi story. I am getting nervous that as the story goes on people will be disappointed in Hikaru's temper but lets face it he is the hot headed twin. It's why we love him!

P.S. Sorry, this chapter turned out longer than I was expecting. Once the ideas started they just wouldn't stop.

"Hey, have you seen Haruhi?" Hikaru asked the second Kaoru walked out of his last class.

"Yeah, she said she was going to be in the library with that Takigawa guy she's doing the project with."

Hikaru frowned at Kaoru's words. "How long ago was that?"

Kaoru looked at his watch. "I don't know a couple of hours ago I guess. She told me before this class."

"A couple of hours. That's enough for one day wouldn't you say. Let's go get her," Hikaru said already headed toward the vast University Library.

Kaoru sighed and followed his brother.

As soon as they reached the library Hikaru froze looking through the window. Kaoru followed his gaze. Haruhi was sitting at the table looking at some papers. Takigawa was leaning over her reading over her shoulder. He was _closely_ reading over her shoulder. Kaoru took a deep breath hoping he could help keep Hikaru calm. Well, at least as calm as Hikaru could be over this situation.

"Grrrrr! What is wrong with this guy?" Hikaru asked harshly. "If he got any closer he'd be kissing her neck. And what is wrong with Haruhi why isn't she pushing him away."

"Calm down, Hikaru. Haruhi isn't even aware of what he is doing. She's too busy studying the papers in front of her."

Hikaru ran his hand through his thick hair. "Jeez, I thought she was less dense and oblivious then she used to be. Look at him! He's so close to her he's breathing down her neck. Do you seriously want me to believe she doesn't feel that? Nobody is that oblivious."

"Apparently Haruhi is. Look at her, Hikaru. She isn't blushing or looking affected at all. She has no interest in him so his actions seem harmless to her."

"Well they're not harmless to me and I've had enough of it," Hikaru said turning to storm into the Library.

"Hey, how about you take a few deep breaths, huh?" Kaoru grabbed his arm to stop him.

Hikaru was going to pull his arm from his brother's grasp when he noticed his hands curled into fists. He could feel his fingernails digging into his palms. Perhaps he did need a minute. Hikaru relaxed his hands as he took a few soothing breaths.

"Better?"

"About as calm as I'm going to get while watching some guy drape himself over Haruhi. MY Haruhi!" Hikaru said his voice rising with every word.

'_So much for deep, calming breaths,' _Kaoru thought watching Hikaru's hands curl back into fists. At this point all he could do was brace himself for impact.

"Almost done here?" Hikaru asked standing directly next to Takigawa. Hikaru's glare sent the man back a few steps.

"Yup. Almost done for the day." Haruhi looked up at Hikaru innocently oblivious to the scene that just took place behind her back.

Hikaru smiled. Relief coursed through him the moment he wrapped his arms around her. It had been like that since the day she could tell them apart. If he was away from her too long he felt tense, agitated only relieved when she was within arms length. It's why he's always had to touch her throughout the years. He knew Kaoru felt the same. He used to only feel this way when separated from Kaoru but for years now he has felt the same about Haruhi. It didn't even surprise him and Kaoru that they felt this way about her. After all, she was still the only person to fully enter their world. As much as they loved the other former hosts even they had not been able to completely penetrate the bubble. Not the way Haruhi did.

"Are you ready to go?" He whispered in her ear. "Kaoru and I were thinking about having a movie night. Just the three of us."

That was news to Kaoru but any chance he got to spend with the two people he loved above all others was fine by him.

"That sounds great," she said absent-mindedly running her fingers through Hikarus hair.

Kaoru felt his chest tighten as he watched the actions of her delicate fingers. He swallowed nervously as he felt a tightening sensation below the belt. When he stepped aside for Hikaru he had no regrets, but that was years ago. He was no longer a first year in high school. He was a man. A man with needs and wants and desires. And what he wanted was Haruhi. Shame, anger, and regret all battled for a place inside of him. Why did Haruhi have to say yes to Hikaru? Why did she have to belong to only one of them? He really didn't want to desire his brother's girlfriend and if Hikaru was dating any other woman he wouldn't. But this was Haruhi. The more years that passed the more important Haruhi became to him. He no longer felt Hikaru was more important which was the only reason he gave her up for his brother in the first place. He wanted Haruhi for his own and with each passing day that desire only grew. He would never try to take her from Hikaru he couldn't do that to either of them but, damn his feelings were getting harder to control.

-The movie was almost over and in truth Haruhi couldn't wait for it to end. Hikaru hadn't let go of her since he picked her up in the Library that afternoon. To some extent she was used to his constant touching. Hikaru had always touched her even more so then Kaoru but today felt needy, suffocating. She wasn't sure how much more she could take.

"Ugh, so tired," Kaoru said as he flopped his head into Haruhi's lap.

Without thought she began running her fingers though his hair. "Mmmm. Me too. I better get going."

"It's too late," Hikaru murmured into her ear. "Don't bother going home. Stay the night."

"I shouldn't. Unlike you two I have a class first thing tomorrow. I need to go."

Hikaru tightened his arms around her waist. "So? You can get up early and go to class from here just as easily as you could from your place. Come on, Haruhi, please, please stay."

Her earlier thoughts weighed on her mind. She really could use a break from all this manhandling. It was times like these she wished she still lived with her father. At least then she could say she had to go home. Hikaru nipped her neck making her shiver. She looked up at him. He pressed his lips firmly to hers.

"Haruhi, please stay," He whispered against her lips.

"Alright," she whispered.

The second she said she's stay Hikaru kissed her again. With his usual fire his kiss was rough, possessive, passionate. He gripped her sides pressing his fingers into her ribs. She moaned into his mouth her fingers curled, gripping onto something, she just couldn't think clearly enough to remember what it was.

Kaorus eyes snapped open at Haruhis moan. Then they squeezed shut in deisre as her fingers gripped his hair. Was this some kind of cruel twist of fate? Just this afternoon he was wishing he could feel her fingers in his hair and now she was gripping the strands as if she'd fall off the face of the Earth if she let go.

Kaorus breathing increased rapidly for several reasons. First of all his arm was under her leg, his hand gripping the inside of her left thigh. Next came the fact that he could hear his brother making out with her. Then there were the moans. Those soft breathy sounds coming from her delicate throat. A throat he's nuzzled countless times through the years. The final and most dangerous reason being that each time she moaned she tightened her grip in his hair until she was tugging on him. Tugging in a way she only did in his dreams. Unfortunately this was really happening. She tugged harder pulling his head back as she let out the longest moan yet. Much to his horror his jeans grew too tight and he let out a moan of his own.

All three of them froze at the same time. Haruhi looked down at him. Her eyes were glazed over confusion in them as she tried to clear her vision and take in what was really happening. Kaoru knew the moment everything clicked into place for her. She was staring at him realizing his head was tilted back because she had tugged him into that position. Her cheeks flamed red as she stared at her fingers. She pulled her fingers away as if she'd been burned.

He was so captivated by the blush spread across her beautiful face that he wasn't capable of movement. He just lay there with his head in her lap staring at her.

"I-I-I'm so sorry, Kaoru, I didn't mean to-I hope I didn't hurt you," she said looking everywhere but directly at his face.

"It-It's okay, Haruhi, You didn't hurt me," he said obviously capable of speech but still incapable of movement.

He frowned when he felt her leg stiffen, then he realized he was still gripping her inner thigh like he was going to…he squeezed his eyes shut trying desperately to cut off his last thought. Now was not the time to be thinking about thighs, and hands, and a blushing Haruhi.

He inwardly groaned as he removed his hand from her thin thigh. When he opened his eyes he jumped slightly. Shocked by the glare Hikaru was giving him. If looks could kill he'd be dead in Haruhi's lap. Hmmmm, not a bad place to die but…_Ugh, get a hold of yourself, Kaoru. _

"No problem, Haruhi, you didn't hurt me," he said standing up. Hikaru glared between him and Haruhi. His brother narrowed his eyes on him. That was when he felt how hot his face was. Jeez, if he was anywhere near the shade Haruhi was no wonder Hikaru was pissed. Just this afternoon he pointed out that Haruhi wasn't blushing because she had no interest in that Takigawa and now they were blushing over each other like a couple of school girls. Hikarus eyes narrowed further as he stared at the zipper of his jeans. Humiliation washed over him as he turned his back on them.

"Well, I'm going to bed. See you two tomorrow," he said heading for the stairs.

"Uh-yeah," Haruhi mumbled. "Good night, Kaoru."

"Yeah, good night." Kaoru did not miss the anger in his brother's voice.

"I should be going to bed too," Haruhi said standing up. "I've got to get up early."

Hikaru stood as well, took her hand, and led her through the vast twists and turns of the massive Hitachiin mansion. This place used to be a complete labyrinth to her but over the years she could navigate it at least as much to find the kitchen, bathroom, veranda, and the wing that housed Hikaru and Kaorus bedrooms.

She stopped in front of the bedroom she normal slept in when she stayed over, but Hikaru kept tugging on her hand. She felt a knot form in the pit of her stomach. This was the first time she has slept over since she started dating Hikaru three months ago.

"Uh-Hikaru, we passed the guest room I always use."

"I know. You're not sleeping there tonight," he said, trying to sound almost casual but she could her the anger in his voice.

Her earlier worry was confirmed when Hikaru stopped outside his bedroom door.

"You're sleeping here, with me," he whispered, his hot breath tightening the knot in her belly.

"Hikaru," she said hesitantly.

"What, we've stayed in the same room before."

"Yeah, the same room but that was different. There were two beds in the lodge."

"Come on, Haruhi," he whispered just before he kissed her senseless. Before she knew it she was on the bed beneath him gripping the back of his shirt. Every ounce of the anger she heard in his voice was in his kiss, in his touch. It frightened her. Perhaps if she took a shower it would give him some time to cool down.

"I-I need to take a shower. I won't have time in the morning. Oh, and by the way do you have anything I can wear?"

The smirk he gave her always put her on edge. It was usually followed by some sort of mischief on his part and some sort of embarrassing situation on her part. She backed up a step his grin only grew.

"Of course I do. Mom has been working on a few new summer pieces for you. I'll be right back."

She tried to calm her pounding heart. Man, Hikaru might be angry but the guy knew how to kiss. Her cheeks flooded once more remembering that they made out right in front of Kaoru. Oh sure they had kissed in front of him before but not like that. Not a full-blown make out session where she was moaning and gripping-_Kaoru's hair._ "Mmmmm," she groaned. She had grabbed Kaoru's hair was tugging on it hard enough that when she looked at him his head was bent back so that he was able to stare right at her. Her face heated up more. Ugh-how embarrassing.

Luckily Hikaru returned stopping her humiliating thoughts. Not so lucky was the fact that his anger increased upon seeing her freshly flushed face.

"I'm going to take that shower now," she said grabbing the clothes in his hand and darting into his bathroom.

Hikaru frowned as he watched her practically run into the bathroom. Normally he was pretty pleased by any blush that graced her adorable face, but this night made him question the reason for all that blushing. He could clearly picture her fingers entwined in Kaorus hair. His anger increased he knew how good it felt when she tugged on his hair. Was Kaoru as affected by her action? _Grrrr! Probably!_ He remembered the look on Kaorus face as he remained in Haruhis lap staring at her like some half-wit. He also remembered the moan Kaoru himself had let slip out of his mouth as if he couldn't control it. Hikaru bristled at that thought. _Kaoru couldn't control it. So her fingers affected him._ And what was with all the blushing the two of them were doing. Hikaru froze as he remembered his earlier conversation with Kaoru. Outside the library he told him he had nothing to worry about because Haruhi was not blushing and therefore not affected by Takigawa. His hands curled into fists. They were both blushing. Did that mean they were affected by each other? He looked at the bathroom door hearing the water run. It was time to have a talk with his brother.

Kaoru had just finished changing for bed when an angry Hikaru barged into his room.

"What the hell, Kaoru? Something you're not telling me?"

"What are you talking about?" Kaoru asked calmly trying hard to mask his guilt.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. I heard your moan and I saw the look on your face." Hikaru seethed. "And don't think I missed the state of your jeans."

Kaoru sighed searching for the right words. "Oh, that."

"Yeah, that," Hikaru bit out.

"It's human nature, Hikaru. I am a guy and you and Haruhi were moaning during your hot and heavy make out session. Geez, the porn industry makes a fortune off the effects moaning has on the human body."

Hikaru looked at him his eyes narrowed and venomous as he studied him. "That better be all it is." With that he turned on his heel, slammed his bedroom door and left.

Kaoru flopped on his bed wishing that was all it was but he knew better.

Hikaru stripped down to his boxers wishing he could strip off this anger just as easily. In truth he was beyond angry. He ran his hands through his hair. _Ugh, why is it so hard to control my temper? Especially where Haruhi is concerned. _He tried to take a deep breath to calm this rage, but he had not succeeded before Haruhi walked out of the bathroom.

His eyes fell on her. She looked so good in the black short shorts and lime green camisole with the scalloped lace along the top. His anger simmered in the background of his mind. Only one word could make it past his lust filled thoughts as he stared at her, _mine! _ The rage he was battling with all day raced through his body as he grabbed her by the upper arms and kissed her fiercely. She was his, damn it. Not Kaoru's to moan over and certainly not that damn Takigawas. He backed her up until he hit the bed. He vaguely wondered if he hurt her as he landed heavily on top of her but he was too lost to break from her and ask.

Haruhi moaned as she felt his hands roaming everywhere. She shivered with partial fear when she actually heard him growl at some point. His hands were rough and unforgiving as he touched her. He yanked the camisole off of her roughly kissing and nipping his way down. Her head was yanked back as he wound his fist in her hair and pulled hard.

"Hikaru, Hikaru, please, stop," she panted using all her strength to push him away.

She grabbed his hair and yanked back trying to pull him off of her.

Hikaru growled once more as she tugged on his hair. Damn it felt so good when she was rough. He was losing control. He froze at that thought. Did Kaoru feel this way when her fingers were in his hair?

"Grrrrr!" he said pulling her even closer against him. He roughly grabbed the top of her shorts.

"Hikaru, I'm serious stop," she said a little fearful of his rough and angry touch.

"Why?" he asked as he kissed his way across her collarbone. "Why should we stop?"

"Be-because I'm not ready for this. We're not ready for this yet. We've only been together three months?"

He pulled away frowning as he looked at her. "Three months, three months," he said the anger building. "I have been wanting this for three _years, _Haruhi. Please let me make you mine."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Hikaru. I just don't feel ready for this."

He sat up swiping a hand down his face. "You're not ready for this or your not ready for this with me?" he asked looking furious.

"What? What are you talking about?"

"You know what I'm talking about," he shouted. "Would you be ready if it was that damn Takigawa who was breathing down your neck?"

"Why would you say such a thing? What would make you think I want him?" she asked her own anger rising. She grabbed her shirt and put it back on.

Hikaru could see the anger on her face. It took a while for Haruhi to hit her limit, but when she did she got truly mad. Hikaru knew he should shut his mouth before this evening disintegrated completely, but as usual his temper over rode his common sense.

"Don't play dumb, Haruhi. I know you're dense but you're GPA shows you're not stupid. Surly you felt the guys breath on your neck today he couldn't have leaned any closer to you."

"You're delusional he was leaning over my shoulder to read the case study we were using for our project. He wasn't breathing on me."

"Yes, he was," he shouted.

"You're wrong," she shouted back.

"Fine, maybe I am wrong. Maybe it's Kaoru you'd rather screw? I could go get him if you want to run your fingers through his hair again."

She jumped up off the bed and smacked his face. "You-you're such a jerk. Why don't you grow up, Hikaru."

The second she opened the door he slammed it shut looming close to the back of her body.

"Am I wrong?" he asked no longer shouting but just as heated as before. "You don't want me so what am I to think."

"I do want you, stupid. I'm just not ready yet. If you would listen instead of jumping to your own conclusions you would hear what I'm saying." He might have lowered his voice but she was still shouting. "Now open this door."

"No," he said his hand still holding it closed.

"I'm serious, Hikaru, Open this door, now!"

"No."

"Hikaru, open this door right now or I'll scream."

He relented only because he didn't really feeling like dealing with Kaoru right now.

As soon as he moved away she ran out the door slamming it in his face.

"Damn," he shouted placing his forehead against the wall.

Just before Haruhi reached the door to the guest room she usually slept in Kaoru appeared in front of her holding a cup of tea.

"Haruhi" he said in surprise. He gulped as he took her in. Her hair was tousled, she had the shortest shorts on he had ever seen, and the camisole she wore was so thin it left very little to the imagination. She was beautiful. He glanced to her eyes not really wanting to see the satisfied glow he'd find if she just slept with his brother, but he couldn't stop himself. What he found was much worse she was spitting fire and on the verge of tears.

"What's wrong?" he asked in concern.

"Nothing," she said trying to walk past him.

"Don't, Haruhi. Don't lie to me," he said quietly.

She sighed in frustrating. "Nothing is wrong with me. It's Hikaru."

"What's wrong with Hikaru?"

"He's an idiot" she seethed.

Kaoru chuckled. "Well, I already knew that."

She chuckled a little feeling some of her anger draining away.

"Good night, Kaoru," she whispered.

She took him by complete surprise when she rose up on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. She gave a sad smile and entered the guest room. _Interesting, why was she sleeping in there?_

He inhaled the scent of her that still lingered in the hallway before heading to his own room.

Hikaru waited for her to return. When she didn't he knew she planned on sleeping in the guest room down the hall. Damn, he sure knew how to ruin what started out as a perfectly good evening. He didn't have to let it all go to waste. He walked down the hall, entered her room, and crawled into bed beside her. She tensed at his touch.

"Hikaru." He heard the warning clearly in her voice.

"Relax, Haruhi. I just want to hold you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay. I've been in a bad mood today. Forgive me?"

"Did you mean what you said? Do you really think I want to sleep with somebody else?"

"No, not really. It's just my jealousy getting the better of me. I'm sorry."

"Than I forgive you but if you ever make such stupid accusations again I might have to smack you upside the head."

"Oooo. Violence. Me like," he said pulling her closer.

She began to giggle though somewhere in the back of her mind she feared Hikaru was a vicious lover. It was why she feared her first time with him. She wasn't sure he could control himself enough to do it without destroying her. She thought about telling him if he would just be gentler she would be ready, but she stopped herself. If she did that then she would be asking Hikaru to change. Kaoru was the gentle one.

Way back when they were splitting and dividing from one person into two, Kaoru got all the gentleness, Hikaru all the angst. Kaoru would be a gentle lover. She stiffened. _Why the hell did I just think that?_

"What's wrong, Haruhi?" Hikaru mumbled into her neck.

"Nothing. Nothing at all," she said knowing Hikaru would not be happy to hear that last thought.

"Good night, Haruhi,"

"Good night, Hikaru."

Three doors down Kaoru lay in bed staring at the ceiling trying to deal with the state in his pants. It had been a battle since Haruhi was ripping the hair out of his head. It was a losing battle since he just saw her in her skimpy night wear and received her kiss. Kaoru groaned. Damn. He feared he was in trouble.

A/N (again): Thoughts would be appreciated. Thanx.


	3. Not a toy

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Ouran High School Host Club. I still make no profit whatsoever from it. I still find that thought depressing!**

A/N: Here is chapter three. Sorry it took so long. I'm back to work after Spring Break and time got away from me. Thank you for the reviews. I hope they keep coming. I love them!

Haruhi woke up feeling extremely warm. She was trying to figure out why she was so over heated. Opening her eyes she found herself staring into thick orange hair. Hikaru's heated breath was brushing her skin as she found him sound asleep, head on her chest. Fully awake now she realized why she was so over heated. Hikaru was wrapped around her like a vine. One arm underneath her, the other wrapped tightly around her waist, holding her impossibly close to him. One ankle twisted around her ankle, his other leg high up on her hip the back of his heel helping to mold her body to his own.

She couldn't move. She couldn't breath. She felt so warm she thought she might faint. She tried to pull away, but Hikaru only tightened his grip.

"Uh-uh," he whispered. "Don't get up. Stay like this."

"I can't. I have to get up," she said still struggling to get away from him.

"No," he said pulling her against him. His lips kissing the side of her neck.

"I have to. I have class."

"Don't go. Let's stay like this for a while longer."

"Hikaru, let go. I have to get up."

"Just skip. It's only one class."

"Not all of us are rich bastards with the luxury of sleeping in. For some of us there are consequences for skipping class. I can't risk losing my scholarship. Not after all that Chairman Suoh has done to ensure it continues."

Hikaru pulled away slightly staring at her with a frown. "You don't have to worry about that, Haruhi. I'll pay for you to repeat the class."

"Don't be an idiot," she said pulling forcefully this time. He let her go. "I don't need you to pay for my classes. I need to get to class so I don't have to worry about being dropped."

"I'm serious though. If you got dropped I'd pay for it. You know that right?"

"Yes, I know you'd pay for it. Just like you know I'd never accept that payment, right?"

"I don't know why. You're my girlfriend and I have more money than I'll ever know what to do with."

She sighed in frustration. "I'm an honor student, Hikaru, I don't need your charity."

He frowned looking at her as she entered the closet that had some of her clothes. He could hear her get dressed.

"I didn't offer because your charity," he said the moment she stepped out. "I offered because I want to take care of you." He felt himself getting angry. He struggled to keep it in check.

"I don't need you to take care of me. I wasn't raised to be pampered and snag myself a husband to look after me. If that's the kind of girl you want, Hikaru, then go look up one of your old customers from the Host Club."

He caught her arm before she walked out of the room. "Hey, if that's the kind of girl I wanted that's who I'd be going out with. I just meant that you don't ever need to worry about money. Hell, Haruhi, you didn't have to worry about money even when we were just best friends you know that."

"I do. Just as you know that throughout our years as friends I never asked you for money."

He could hear the anger in her voice he was getting angry himself.

"Why the hell are we fighting about this? I just wanted to spend a little extra time with you this morning. Is that a crime?"

"When I have a class to get to yes it is. I've got to go. If I don't leave now I'll be late."

"What about breakfast?"

"No time. I'll see you later."

He reached out grabbing her arm once more. "Hey, you're forgetting something."

She smiled at the smirk on his face. She stood up on her toes so she could reach his mouth. She placed her lips against his and tried to kiss him quickly.

Hikaru was having none of that. The second her lips touched his he pulled her close and deepened the kiss. He moaned into her mouth tugging her hips up against his own.

"Come on, Haruhi, don't go to class. They're not going to drop you if you miss one class."

"I'm not missing class I can't afford to get behind. Especially since it's so close to the end of term." She kissed him once more then reached for the door.

"Fine," he bit out pouting like the spoiled brat that he was. "Meet me at the café for lunch and don't tell me you don't have time for that. Even honor students have to eat."

"Fine. I'll meet you there at one o'clock."

Haruhi was running down the sidewalk checking her watch. She was relieved to find she still had fifteen minutes before she had to meet Hikaru. After his temper tantrum this morning she really didn't want to be late and give him another reason to be mad at her. She walked into the café frowning. Unfortunately Hikaru spent more time being mad at her than not these days.

"Haru-chan, come sit with us."

The frown was replaced by a smile when she seen Hunny-Senpai waving her over to a table he was sitting at with Mori-Senpai.

"Hey guys, is there enough room for Hikaru and probably Kaoru too."

"Of course, Haru-chan. We will just pull up a few more chairs."

"Haruhi?"

She turned at the voice calling her from across the café a smile lighting her beautiful face.

"Arai? Excuse me guys I'll be right back," she said as she walked toward her old friend she hadn't seen in so long.

"Wow, I haven't seen you in so long," he said taking in every inch of her. "You've grown up some in that time."

She blushed slightly as she realized his eyes lingered a little bit longer than they should have at her chest. She resisted the urge to tug up the top of her tank top cursing Hikaru for designing these dipping necklines when he designed for her.

"Yeah, it's been a while. What have you been up to?"

His eyes snapped back to her face as he began to catch her up on his life.

Hikaru was just about to open the door to the café when he stopped short. Kaoru walked into the back of him.

"What the hell, Hikaru?" he said rubbing his nose.

"Why does this seem to happen every time I see her," Hikaru growled.

Kaoru looked up to find some guy talking to Haruhi. Standing closely to Haruhi. He sighed. Hikaru had been in such a good mood this morning too.

"He looks familiar," Kaoru said now that he got a better look at the guy.

Hikaru stared at the guy. He did look familiar. Recognition dawned on him as his anger grew. "Karuizawa."

Kaoru looked back at the guy. It was the friend of Haruhi's they had met in Karuizawa. The guy who set Hikaru off like no other.

Hikaru watched her friend from middle school. He tried to look interested in whatever Haruhi was saying, but Hikaru could see the frequent glances toward the slight cleavage rising above her camisole tank top. Hikaru jerked the door open and made his way toward Haruhi.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and placed his chin on her shoulder just as he had done when approaching her with that damn Takigawa.

"Hey," he said leaning over to kiss her cheek.

"Hey," she said smiling at him.

"I know you," Arai said frowning slightly as he looked at him. "You're one of Haruhi's Ouran friends that I meet in Karuizawa right?"

"Well we were just friends then but that was a long time ago. We're dating now."

Arai's frown only deepened. "I thought there was something between the two of you."

"You thought right," Hikaru said as he straightened up keeping his hands on her. The deeper Arai frowned the angrier he got. He began running his hands possessively along Haruhi's sides.

"Hikaru, stop," Haruhi said trying to step out of his grasp.

"Awww, come on, Haruhi, that's not what you said last night," he whispered implying a lot more than the innocent touches of the previous night.

"Hikaru," she said her cheeks blazing red.

"Come on," he said tired of watching this Arai eye her up and down. "Let's go have lunch. We have class soon and I know you'll never miss one."

She stared at him frowning at the sarcasm in his voice.

"But, Arai was just…"

"Was just what?" he interrupted sharply.

"I was just catching up with Haruhi. It's been a while." The other guy said with that annoying friendly smile he wore way back in Karuizawa.

"Well, since it's been so long you would think you could take the hint," Hikaru snapped.

"Hikaru," Haruhi seethed glancing around the café uncomfortable with the attention Hikaru's temper was gaining them.

"What? It's true," he said pinning Arai with a glare. "I mean how many years is it going to take before it sinks in that she has no room for you in her life. If she had a place for you then you would have been by her side _everyday_ all these years since Karuizawa."

"Hikaru," Haruhi said her voice filled with anger. He could hear it. He knew she'd be mad but damn it, he was mad too.

"But she hasn't needed you because she has me," Hikaru continued ignoring her warning to stop. "You are nothing in her life. I guess I wasn't clear all those years ago. Allow me to be clear now, stay away from my girl."

"Hey, man, I just wanted to talk to her…"

"If she had something to say to you she would have been in touch. Let's go, Haruhi," he said pulling on her hand.

"Stop being so rude," she whispered standing her ground.

"I'm rude. Well what about him. I mean most people would consider it rude to be sniffing around another guy's girl. Don't you think that's rude? I do, and I'm done watching it. Let's go," he said pulling her out of the café.

"Sorry, Arai," she whispered. As Hikaru pulled her out of the café she tried to ignore the stares of every patron inside the place.

Kaoru frowned as he watched the interaction between Hikaru and Arai. He was not the only one.

"Kao-chan, Hika-chan's behavior is a bit…" Hunny stared at him as he searched for the right word.

"Concerning," Mori finished a deep frown on the taller mans face.

"I know." Kaoru sighed looking at his older friends.

"Takashi has noticed that Haru-chan seems distracted while they are studying. She seems sad."

"I know," he repeated. "I've noticed it too. Hikaru's temper is getting the best of him. I don't know what to do."

"Well, I hope you think of something. We love Hika-chan but we will not stand by and watch him hurt Haru-chan." Hunny had that dark look in his eyes that he only wore when dealing with an enemy that was hurting his friends.

"Hnn," Mori agreed looking equally serious.

"If you have any suggestions, Hunny-Senpai, I'm all ears," he said at a loss to help his hot-tempered brother.

"Stop pulling on me," Haruhi said as Hikaru dragged her through the halls of the University. "I'm serious, Hikaru, Let go."

"No," he said pulling her closer to him.

"You need to calm down," she said digging her heels in and stopping his movement. "What is wrong with you? You humiliated us all back there. You no how much I hate to be the center of attention. You acted like a child."

Hikaru yanked her into an empty classroom.

"So, I'm a child if I don't enjoy seeing some guy leering at my girlfriend?"

"He wasn't leering. We were just talking. I don't know why it's such a big deal to you. He's just an old friend."

"Maybe you see him as a friend. He has never seen you that way. He even confessed to you."

"That was back in middle school."

"Yeah, and every time he sees he looks more and more interested. Why do you have to be so oblivious to a guy's attention? It infuriates me."

"Well excuse me for not thinking every guy wants to jump my bones. You and your immature behavior is what's infuriating."

"Oh, come on, Haruhi," he seethed. "Are you really going to look me in the eye and tell me you still can't tell when a guy is interested in you. He was practically undressing you with his eyes."

"You're being ridiculous. He is just a friend. A friend. And a mature one at that. He wasn't the one making a scene in Karuizawa and he wasn't the one making a scene today at the café. That was you, both times."

She started to walk away. His grip on her wrist tightened.

"Where do you think you're going?"

"I'm out of here. I'm going for something to eat, and you need to calm yourself."

"We're not done here," he said pulling her close.

"I have nothing more to say."

"I do," he said backing her up against a wall. He began kissing her neck. She tried to pull away but she had nowhere to go.

"A game, Haruhi," he whispered into her ear.

"What?" she asked looking furious.

"A game. If I make you forget everyone but me then I'll calm down. If you keep thinking of someone else then you lose and you'll have to pay a penalty."

She pushed him away her anger giving her strength.

"We are not in High School anymore. I'm your girlfriend, Hikaru, not your toy."

He pressed himself against her. His hot breath panting in her ear.

"You are my girlfriend but you're my toy too. You always have been you always will be."

He kissed her roughly. She tightened her lips and refused to kiss him back. This only angered him more. He ran his hands roughly up the front of her tank top. She moaned the tiniest bit, but it was enough for Hikaru to slip his tongue into her mouth and deepen the kiss.

After a few moments he felt her fingers in his hair. He smiled against her lips. He swiped his tongue across her bottom lip and ran his hands down her hips. He grabbed her bottom and pulled her against the growing bulge in his jeans.

"Hikaru," she whispered.

That's what he had been waiting for. He puled away from her a mischievous smirk on his face.

"Now you're only thinking of me. I win," he said his smile growing.

"Ugh, you're such a jerk," she said and stormed out of the room.

Kaoru walked into class and frowned. His brother smiled like a cat that just swallowed a canary and Haruhi looked like she was about to punch his brother, or cry in his arms.

"Hey, you all right?" he asked taking his seat beside her.

She merely nodded her head yes. That wasn't good. Though Haruhi was one of the quieter members of the Host Club, she was never at a loss to express herself to him. He looked at his brother who continued to hum with a satisfied look on his face. Hunny-Senpai's warning came back to him. Hikaru wouldn't be smiling if he heard Hunny's threat. Maybe he should tell him.

Kaoru barely heard a word the Professor said. He would have to get notes from Haruhi. She would have taken excellent notes even if she were distracted. The girl's brilliant mind worked on autopilot when it came to academics.

At the end of class Hikaru stood up and took Haruhi's hand in his. She jerked it away violently. Hikaru looked shocked.

"I repeat, I am not your toy. I don't need to be lead around by the hand as if I'm some kind of mindless doll."

Before Hikaru could come out of his shock Haruhi was already gone.

Kaoru thought about her words and frowned at his brother.

"What?" Hikaru said defensively.

"Please tell me you do not still call your girlfriend your toy?"

Hikaru stared at him saying nothing. Which actually told him everything.

"She is not a plaything, Hikaru. She didn't like that reference back in High School you think she's going to like it as your girlfriend?"

"Shut up. What do you know? You think of her as our toy too and you know it. If she were your girlfriend instead of mine you wouldn't think any differently."

"You should know better than that. If Haruhi were my girlfriend I would love her not play with her. You shouldn't be playing with her either."

Hikaru walked away before saying something to his brother that he would regret. Maybe Kaoru was right. He had to calm down, find Haruhi, and apologize to her.

Haruhi was walking down the hall willing herself to calm down. She had to meet with Mori-Senpai in a less than two hours and if he saw her like this he would stare at her silently until she spilled. For such a quiet guy he sure knew how to get people to talk.

"Hey, Fujioka."

Haruhi looked up to see one of the jocks from the former football club at Ouran Academy approaching her. She never really liked him much. Contrary to Hikaru's belief she did know when men were leering at her. This guy was one of them. At least he was with a friend so they weren't alone.

"Hey, Tarumi-Senpai," she said trying to walk by. He blocked her way forcing her to stop.

"We saw what happened in the café this afternoon. When you get tired of dating that hot headed fashion twin remember there are more mature men that have their eye on you since you stopped masquerading as a guy in the Host Club. I used to want to kick your ass for making me feel like a homo since I was attracted to you but all that anger disappeared when I found out you were a chick. A fine looking chick at that. I've had my eye on you since back in the academy. Remember that."

"Like she'd ever go for a dumb jock like you," Hikaru said putting one arm around her waist. "Stay away from my girl, Senpai."

The jocks smile grew. "You seem to be saying that a lot today. Better watch out, Hitachiin, I'm far from the only guy with an eye on your girl." His eyes lingered on the swell of cleavage sticking out from her top. Just like Arai. All thoughts of calming down and apologizing went right out the window as his rising anger got the best of him.

"If you can't control your jealousy then you shouldn't date such a gorgeous girl. Remember what I said, Fujioka," with that the jock winked at Haruhi and walked away.

Hikaru was furious. He grabbed Haruhi's hand and walked out of the building.

"What are you doing? Where are we going? I have some research to do before I meet Mori-Senpai for study group."

"You've got over an hour and a half before then. I've got to get out of here for a bit and you're coming with me."

Hikaru tried to calm down but found that he couldn't. What the hell was going on today? Was this some kind of game? The how much can you piss off Hikaru game? Was this Kaoru's doing?

Hikaru looked back to see Tarumi leaning against a pillar watching Haruhi walk away with him. No, this wasn't Kaoru's doing. This was some kind of twisted fate conspiring against him. He opened the passenger door to his R8 Spyder and helped Haruhi in he slammed her door, slammed his own and sped to his estate.

Once inside he led Haruhi to the study and threw her on the love seat. He crawled on top of her and kissed her fiercely. Some of his anger turned into lust. He relished the feeling. This is what he needed. Their bubble. He needed to be away from the outside world. He never knew why he ever had to leave the house. If Haruhi and Kaoru were with him who cared about anyone else?

He hated other guys for staring at his Haruhi. Sure the girl was drop dead gorgeous but she was taken. Couldn't these guys take the hint? All he could see were Arai's eyes and Tarumi's eyes staring at her chest. He had to mark her, claim her, and let all those other guys know she was his.

He kissed his way down to the soft swell of her breast. His hands on her hips holding her tightly to his body.

"Hikaru, Hikaru, stop," he barely heard her whisper. He was too lost in his fog of possession in his mindless quest to conquer and claim her. All thought left him as a primal need to make claim came over him. He felt her hands on his wrist as he tried to tug on the waist of her jeans. She yanked on his wrist hard.

"Hikaru, stop, owwww, owww, Hikaru, you're hurting me."

He placed his hands back on her hips as he moved his mouth off of the soft skin of her chest.

"Maybe now you'll have to cover them up instead of putting them on display for the likes of Arai and Tarumi," he said harshly. He stopped ranting when he noticed her tears. "Don't cry, Haruhi, I'm sorry, don't cry."

"It, it hurts," she whispered still fearful of his angry touch, his angry passion.

He looked down wondering why a few hickeys would be something to cause Haruhi to cry. The girl never cried. What he saw made him jump off of her in horror. There on the top of each breast were not hickeys but bite marks. One just brought blood to the surface, the other broke the skin completely. She was actually bleeding.

"Haruhi, I, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"Give me your shirt," she said bluntly no traces of her tears in her voice.

"What?"

"I have to go back to the University to study with Mori-Senpai and I can't go back like this. Give me your shirt."

He unbuttoned his white shirt and handed it to her. He silently watched her put it on wincing a bit when the material moved across her sensitive, broken skin.

"Haruhi, I'm really…"

"I've got to go," she said and walked out of the room. He heard her ask one of his drivers to return her to school. He was so shocked by what he'd done he didn't even try to stop her.

Kaoru was heading toward the library to talk to Mori-Senpai when he noticed Haruhi with her head down wearing the shirt Hikaru had been wearing that day.

"Haruhi?"

Kaoru gasped when he saw that she'd been crying.

"What's wrong?" he asked walking up to her.

She merely nodded her head her bottom lip quivering slightly.

"Haruhi, don't lie to me. Tell me what's wrong. I'm your friend, tell me."

"Not now," she whispered. "For now, just hold me a minute okay, Kaoru."

"Sure, Haruhi, whatever you need," he said pulling her close.

Haruhi pressed herself against him. Her hands gripping the front of his shirt. She buried her face in his chest. She cried no tears but he could feel her trembling slightly. What did Hikaru do this time? The sweet scent of her hair assaulted his nose just as he began to feel the heat of her body pressed against his. He felt that all too familiar tightening in his jeans and pulled his hips back slightly hoping she didn't feel it. What the hell was he thinking? The poor girl was shaking in his arms because she needed comfort and all he could think about was how good she felt against him. Kaoru took a deep breath as he struggled to only think of Haruhi as his best friend and not the young woman he desperately wanted to make love to.

A/N (again): Please don't give up on me. I'm sure you are now getting bored with Hikaru's jealousy and anger, I just wanted to set the stage for why he has so much angst and how the rest of the characters deal with it. There is so much more to the story than just his anger. I promise. The other members of the former Host Club will be joining us in the next chapter or two so please stick with me. If you do I would greatly appreciate it. Also any reviews are appreciated as well. They remind me to get on the computer and keep going. Arigato.


	4. Don't Lie To Me

**Disclaimer: Sadly, I will never own Ouran Host Club nor will I ever make any profit off of it. That honor belongs solely to Bisco Hatori. I just borrow her amazing characters to play for a while.**

A/N: Sorry if it feels long between chapters. I have the full story outlined but it takes me a while to flesh it out sometimes. I hope you enjoy this chapter. I enjoyed writing it because my favorite character, Mori, makes an appearance. Yay! As always thank you for your support, reviews, and encouragement. It really helps me keep going.

"Haruhi, What's…" Kaoru started but Haruhi interrupted him.

"Don't, Kaoru, I can't talk right now. I should already be in the library with Mori-Senpai and the rest of the study group. I'll talk to you later okay?"

"All right, text me if you need too," Kaoru said reluctantly letting her go.

"I will, and Kaoru, thanks."

He smiled gently at her. "Anytime."

Her eyes felt so bad from rubbing away the tears they felt like glass was in them. She could only image what they looked like. She decided to stop at the bathroom before going to the Library.

As soon as she looked in the mirror she wondered how she could avoid a confrontation with Mori. He would know something was wrong as soon as he looked at her. Mori didn't miss anything. Especially when it came to her and Hunny-Senpai. Maybe she could blame her contacts she thought as she splashed some cold water on her face.

Walking into the Library she easily found her group. The older pre law students were encouraged to help tutor the first year students. They could have up to four students to mentor. Mori agreed to tutor, but took only Haruhi as a student. Another guy in his grade took on two students, but since Mori was the top student in his year, and Haruhi was the top student in her year, the guy asked if they could combine their groups. She felt bad for being late when she noticed all four of them looking through papers and books already hard at work.

She slipped quietly into a seat hoping to get to work before Mori could get a good look at her and start his questioning. She should have known better.

"Haruhi?" he questioned staring intently at her.

"Yes, Mori-Senpai?" she asked pasting on her former host smile.

He frowned knowing she was trying to fool him. _Damn, why did he have to be so observant?_

"What's wrong?" he asked quietly.

"Nothing," she said hoping not to sound defensive.

Mori merely narrowed his eyes at her. She squirmed a bit in her seat as he continued to stare at her waiting for the truth.

"I think my contacts might be drying out," she said calmly hoping he would buy that. "Sorry I was late. What are we working on?"

She stood up to reach an article from the middle of the table when one of Mori's massive hands grabbed her own. He stood quickly looking down at her. She knew what he was doing. He was using his towering height to intimidate her. Surely Mori knew she could never be afraid of him.

"Don't lie to me, Haruhi," he said his voice filled with anger.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed the rest of the group staring at mori. It was not often the gentle giant sounded as angry as he just did.

"Mori-Senpai, really I'm…" The look on his face caused the words to die in her mouth. His eyes narrowed further and he looked even angrier.

"Do not lie to me," he repeated.

Since she didn't want to lie, and she didn't want to tell him the truth she said nothing. She just stood there staring at him. His grip on her hand tightened. He glared at her. She glared right back.

"You, Haruhi, who never lies will now look me in the eye and lie right to my face?"

"Mori," she said in a pleading voice. She glanced around the group hoping he would understand that she didn't wish to speak in front of the others.

Mori knew Haruhi was lying just as he knew he would get the truth out of her eventually. She may be very guarded when it came to her feelings, but she never out right lied to any of them. He was not about to let her start now. He tightened his grip on her hand, which caused him to tug on the overtly long sleeve of her shirt. This in turn shifted the entire left side opening the front to expose a bit of her chest.

Mori blushed as he realized he was staring at her cleavage. This was Haruhi. Even though he always found her beautiful, he had no right to look down the front of her shirt. No right to stare at her creamy white skin dotted with…He froze then his eyes widened in shock as he realized what he was seeing.

As soon as Haruhi noticed where he was staring she pulled her hand free from his grasp and tugged on the top of the shirt to close the opening he had inadvertently made. She began to sit down hoping Mori would let it go until they were alone. Once again she should have known better.

Mori looked angrier, grabbed he wrist and yanked her out of her seat. She gave a small squeak at the sudden movement. The rest of the group looked at her in shock and Mori in fear. She couldn't blame them since they were both acting pretty out of character. Before she could protest Mori was walking them into a far back corner of the Library.

The only other girl in the study group watched in fear as the giant Morinozuka-Senpai led the tiny Fujioka-san away from their table. Morinozuka was a large intimidating man built like a brick wall. Fujioka was about the tiniest woman she knew standing a good four inches shorter than herself. She always feared Morinozuka even though he usually had a calm demeanor about him. Fujioka didn't seem to fear him in the least. In fact she even had the nerve to glare at him as he was staring her down. That didn't stop him from dragging the girl away. She could tell the rest of the group was just as curious as she was about the interaction between them just as she knew they would never know the reason for it. Fujioka rarely spoke about herself or her personal life. The only thing she knew besides the fact that she was a pre law student was that she was dating one of those identical twins. Morinozuka never uttered one personal thing to anyone. As far as she could tell he was only open with two people, his cousin Haninozuka-Senpai, and Fujioka, whom he intimately called by her given name, Haruhi. How close were they? Why did he look angrier after looking down her shirt? Why was he looking down here shirt when she was dating another man? She sighed and decided to get back to work. It's not like any of her questions were going to get answered.

As soon as they reached a secluded back corner, Mori spun her around to face him. Without a word he began quickly unbuttoning her shirt. The intimacy of the act caused her to blush and try to pull away. Mori wasn't having it. He tugged her closer to him and continued his way down the buttons. A blush tinged his cheeks as he hooked a finger inside the top of her tank top pulling it away from her skin. He glanced right inside. She felt her own face flush when she realized he was getting quite a full view of the white lace bra she was wearing. His anger obviously overrode his embarrassment as he continued his inspection. After letting go of the top he placed a hand on the bottom of her tank and yanked it up to the bottom of her bra exposing her flat stomach.

Mori hissed in anger after seeing the bite marks on her chest and the bruising on her hips. His eyes turned colder and his grip tightened on her wrist.

"This isn't what it looks like," she began hoping to lessen some of the anger she could actually feel pouring off of him.

"You are bitten and bruised. You think I will allow that?" He asked a murderous look darkening his steel grey eyes. His mouth was set in such a tight, grim line she couldn't have fed him a piece of floss.

"No, it's really not like that…Hikaru just…he just got a little…." She stopped trying desperately to think of how to explain it without enraging Mori further.

"He just what?" Mori asked prompting her to continue.

"Well, it was when we were, you know, making out and he was jealous about Arai and that idiot Tarumi-Senpai, and he just meant to leave some hickeys as some kind of mark I guess and he just got a little too rough and got a little carried away, you know." She fumbled through the entire explanation hoping Mori's anger would ease. It didn't, if anything the man looked more furious.

"That is even worse. Abusing your woman while masking it as an act of love."

Haruhi gasped at his choice of words. "Abuse. Who said anything about abuse? Mori-Senpai, you know Hikaru would never abuse me."

"Haruhi, he left bite marks. It broke the skin. "

"You are blowing this way out of proportion. It really didn't happen the way you're imagining. He really did just get carried away."

"Look me in the eye and tell me you like it rough, Haruhi. Look me in the eye and tell me you enjoyed being bit."

She looked at him speechless. What was she supposed to say? Of course she didn't enjoy it. She couldn't lie to him and say she did, but it didn't happen through some abusive fight. Hikaru didn't purposely grab her and bite her. He didn't mean to hurt her. She couldn't stop staring at him as she struggled to think of how best to answer him.

Her silence seemed to be all the answer he needed. He let go of her wrist suddenly, clenched his fists, and began to stalk away.

"Where are you going?" she asked knowing he wasn't going to simply let this drop. Mori was to over protective for that.

"To find Hikaru," he forced out between grit teeth. Her blood ran cold. She had never heard Mori sound so angry. If he got a hold of Hikaru now he would kill him.

"No," she said grabbing tightly to one of his wrists with both of her hands. She tried to dig her heels in, but he kept walking. She was dragged forward without any effort at all. "No, please don't, please, Mori, I'm begging you to stop. It's not abuse; I swear he really did just get carried away. He didn't do it on purpose. He's already apologized. He was really sorry. You should have seen the look on his face," Haruhi said as he continued to stalk up the row of the Library. She was gliding along behind him as if she were on skates. They were drawing attention now that they were no longer in the back corner.

"Mori, please." The desperation in her voice must have reached him for he stopped suddenly and looked at her.

Tears began to sting her eyes. Mori's eyes softened. He sighed in defeat as he pulled her close to him. She clutched on to the front of his shirt. He held her face tightly against his rib cage. She could feel him shaking slightly as he struggled to let go of his pent up anger. He sighed once more.

"One time. Only this one time because you ask it of me, Haruhi, but your pleading will not stop me if this happens again. Do you understand me?"

"Yes," she said gratefully into him.

He held her tighter if that were possible. She wanted to tell him it was difficult to breath but she couldn't. He was fighting his instinct to protect because she asked him too. He was doing this for her and so she would endure his bone crushing hold as he calmed himself.

After an eternity of holding her close and about a million curious looks from other students he eased up on his hold. She could only imagine what others thought as they watched Mori embracing her so publicly. A public display of affection was not typical for either of them. She hated the attention this scene was getting her, but it was better then letting him stalk off and kill Hikaru.

She quickly rebuttoned the front of Hikaru's shirt. When she was done Mori grabbed her hand and walked her back to their study group.

"So, where were we?" she asked acting like nothing had happened. The rest of the group hid their curious glances.

"We need one more case study to compare and contrast to the previous ones we have been working on," the older male of the group said.

"I was thinking of one I remembered reading the other day," Haruhi said. "I'll go see if I can find it, then we can decide if we can use it."

Haruhi walked away from the group glad to have a task that would give her a few moments to herself. She took a few calming breaths hoping to gain some focus so she could be of some use to the group instead of just a distraction or worse an object of gossip. She felt her face flush at that thought.

Mori could feel the rest of the group glancing at him curiously. He would have preferred to study with just Haruhi, but because of their excellent grades his professor persuaded him to join another group so they could help them out. He was never comfortable with the arrangement and now he down right loathed it. Dropping his usual calm Mori glared at them as he watched Haruhi walk away. As soon as she was out of sight, he pulled out his cell phone added a few contacts, and began texting. Once his message was done he hit send and repocketed his phone.

Kaoru felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He smiled slightly hoping it was Haruhi. He frowned when he noticed it was from Mori-Senpai. He never received a text from him. If they were ever getting together with him it was also with Hunny-Senpai and Hunny always sent the message. Curiously he looked at the message. He was shocked by what he read. _Holy shit, Mori was going to kill Hikaru _Kaoru thought as he ran for the Library.

Haruhi headed back to the group once she had composed herself and found the journal she had been looking for. She was surprised to see Kaoru sitting silently next to Mori.

"Kaoru?" she asked him curious about his presence.

Kaoru's eyes blazed with sympathy as he gently pulled her in his arms.

Mori must have contacted him. Nothing else could explain Kaoru's sympathy. _How dare Mori do this? How dare he tell her business to someone else even if it was Kaoru?_ She pulled away glaring at Mori.

He returned the glare raising an eyebrow daring her to speak up about his interference.

"Walk with me?" Kaoru asked gently.

"I'm sorry, Kaoru, I'm in the middle of study group," she said.

He gently took her hand. "This will only take a minute."

She sighed letting him lead her away but not before sending another glare Mori's way. He shrugged as if he could care less about her silent threat. Since she was no match for him he probably didn't.

Kaoru walked her to the same isolated corner she had been standing in with Mori. He repeated his actions perfectly. After seeing the bites and the bruises the sympathy in his eyes only grew. It was quickly replaced by disappointment.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't know. Why didn't you tell me, Haruhi? I thought I was your best friend." The hurt look on his face erased the anger she felt at his interference.

"You are my best friend," she said trying to reassure him.

"Then why would you keep something like this from me?"

"I'm not keeping anything from you. It just happened this afternoon, and Mori-Senpai is blowing it way out of proportion. It's not like Hikaru hit me. He just got carried away. You know he would never hurt me."

"You're going to tell me this didn't hurt?" he said his fingers hovering over the bite marks.

"You know what I mean. He didn't hurt me on purpose. He wouldn't hurt me. You know that, Kaoru."

"Do I?" he asked running his hands through his hair in frustration. "I thought I knew that, Haruhi. I thought I knew Hikaru as well as I know myself but his anger is getting the best of him and now this. I don't know what to think." He looked at her sadly and pulled her in his arms.

"I have to get back to the group," she said pulling away. They headed toward the front of the Library, when Kaoru grabbed her arm halting her movements.

"Would you have told me?" he asked her suddenly.

She looked at him knowing she wouldn't since she really did just see it as Hikaru getting a little rougher than he intended.

"No," she said not wanting to lie.

"Why?" he asked the hurt look all over his face again.

"Because he didn't mean to do it so there was nothing to tell. It really wasn't Mori-Senpai's place to tell you either."

"Mori's just worried. I am too, Haruhi," he said pulling her back in his arms. "Promise me you will tell me if Hikaru ever gets that angry again."

She said nothing as he held her.

"Promise me, please."

The pleading in his voice was her undoing. "Okay, Kaoru. I'll tell you."

"Promise."

"I promise."

He tightened his hold. This drew more attention from the students in the Library. Just a short while ago they watched her in the same position with Mori. Glancing around she could tell most people looked away quickly probably mistaking Kaoru for Hikaru. That thought didn't last long however.

"What the hell, Haruhi? Any reason you're in my brothers arms?"

"No, Hikaru, I just…I just needed some comfort for a moment that's all." She could have faced palmed knowing that was going to need an explanation.

"Why do you go else were for attention. First Arai and now my own brother. If you need any comfort you should be coming to me."

"You're right. I'm sorry," she said hoping to diffuse the situation before Mori-Senpai heard them and went after Hikaru.

Hikaru glanced around at the people staring at them. For once he seemed bothered by it. "Let's go."

"I can't. I still have about a half an hour with my study group."

"Fine. The limo is out front. Come out when you're done. Kaoru?" he asked waiting for his brother to join him.

"I think I'll stay," Kaoru said. He knew Hikaru wouldn't like that. He knew he'd have to explain himself later, but right know he was too angry at Hikaru to want to be alone with him.

"Fine, whatever. Come out with Haruhi or find your own ride home."

Kaoru just nodded his agreement. Hikaru walked out of the Library.

"You should go with him. You staying is only going to make him more angry," she said.

"Yeah, well, that's too bad. I'm angry too. I don't feel like being with him right now."

Haruhi sighed. She needed to get back to group and pull her weight a little bit today. She felt like the weak link in the group and she did not enjoy that feeling.

Hikaru slammed the limo door shut and flopped back against the seat.

"Where to young Master?" the driver asked politely.

"No where yet. We're waiting for Haruhi and Kaoru."

"Very well, Master Hikaru," the driver said using his name only after he gave him a clue to which one he was. Hikaru sighed. How come Haruhi was the only person who could tell them apart so easily? How could it be so easy for her when it seemed so impossible for everyone else? It was one of the reasons he loved her so much. One of the reasons they both loved her so much. But exactly how much did Kaoru love Haruhi? What was going on between the two of them lately?

Hikaru sighed as he leaned back against the plush seat. He wished Haruhi could feel the way he felt. He wished she could understand his jealousy just a little bit. Maybe then she wouldn't be so eager to talk and laugh and hug other men. How could he get her to understand? How could he explain it to her? It couldn't be something subtle since she herself was so oblivious to jealous situations. He almost laughed. She really was dense when it came to emotions. How could such an intelligent girl be so dumb when it came to men?

A thought came to mind. Could this idea possibly work? There was only one way to find out. He just had to make a quick call. With any luck he could carry out his plan tonight and finally get her to see how he feels. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his mother.

After forty minutes Haruhi began packing her things. She didn't miss the look that passed between Mori and Kaoru but she pretended not to see it. She really didn't feel like hearing anything from either one of them right now.

"Haruhi?"

"Yes, Mori-Senpai," she said looking at him.

"Just this once," he reminded her.

"I know. I'll see you Thursday."

He just nodded his head and watched her walk out the door with Kaoru. He felt better knowing Kaoru was with her. He always acted as a buffer between the two.

As soon as they were in the limo Hikaru told the driver to go to Haruhi's apartment. This surprised her since she was expecting to be brought to the Hitachiin mansion for a big fight over the hug she shared with Kaoru. She leaned back relaxing glad she was spared that argument.

"Sorry to bring you straight home, Haruhi, but I have some photo shoot ideas I promised my Mom. Can you come to the studio? Meet me in the dressing room at seven pm sharp?"

"Sure. I can meet you there," she said. She was actually looking forward to the evening. She loved watching Hikaru put a photo scene together. He really was so creative. She just hoped he didn't ask her to model as he often did.

"Don't forget seven sharp," he said as they pulled up in front of her apartment. "Kaoru will pick you up."

Kaoru looked at him but didn't dispute it. He never minded being around Haruhi. With any like he could help Hikaru dress her up and model some of their mother's clothes. Kaoru frowned. Did that make her a toy? No, Kaoru decided she was a muse to him, not a toy.

"I'll be ready," she said reaching for the door handle.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" he asked her.

She leaned over to give him a quick kiss goodbye, but he kissed her hard. It was long, possessive. She moaned slightly before gently pushing him away.

"Bye, Kaoru," she said as she opened the door.

"Bye, Haruhi. I'll come by about quarter after six."

"Okay. See you then."

Kaoru's eyes mirrored Hikaru's as both guys watched her until she was safely inside her apartment. Kaoru closed his eyes not really wishing to talk to his brother. He wanted to demand answers for his behavior, but he didn't want to do it in front of the driver. No reason to cause any gossip.

He rubbed his eyes suddenly smelling Haruhi's intoxicating scent on his sleeve. His whole body heated remembering the hug they had recently shared. Her Jasmine scent flooded his nose as he remembered how tiny and vulnerable she had felt in his arms. She fit against him like a perfectly matching puzzle piece. He groaned inwardly. Fighting off his feelings for her was getting tiring. He wondered how much longer he could last.

A/N (again) I know Mori said more than one word at a time but I figured knowing Haruhi better than he did back in high school he would be more comfortable talking to her. I hope I didn't make him too out of character. Please let me know what you think. I love to hear from you. Arigato! 


	5. Are you insane?

**Disclaimer: Now matter how hard I wish it I still don't own Ouran High School Host Club. That distinction will always belong to Bisco Hatori! She is the genius behind these great characters and therefore is the one to receive all the profits. I make no profits. I am just lucky enough to receive some awesome reviews. Thanks, guys! I appreciate your encouragement.**

A/N: Thank you for all your reviews. I eagerly look forward to reading what you thought. Now the story is really getting started. I wonder what everyone will think about it as it goes on. Please let me know. Enjoy!

Haruhi stepped inside her apartment wondering if she should change her clothes. She decided against it when she thought about where she was going tonight. If Hikaru asked her to a photo shoot he might want her to model. If she went by past experiences of these shoots she would be changing more than she wanted too. There was no sense in doing so now.

She smiled in relief when she thought about his invitation. He was mad when he saw her in Kaoru's arms, but for once he didn't seem to want to punish her for it. For that she was grateful. That was all she wanted really. For him to understand how she felt. She wished he could see he had nothing to be jealous of no matter how many guys talked to her. Hopefully they could have a fun night and just enjoy each other for once.

She looked at the clock and pulled some vegetables out of the fridge. She didn't have much time before Kaoru came to pick her up. Hikaru wanted them there by seven sharp so she wanted to be ready. She began chopping a cucumber while humming happily to herself.

She was just washing the few dishes she had used when she heard the knock on her door. She opened the door. Her smile fell when Kaoru walked in looking at her with pity. She felt her defenses rising.

"Will you stop looking at me like that? I'm fine. Hikaru's fine. He just lets his anger get the best of him. You know he still struggles with his feelings. He has an angry outburst first and thinks second. It's just the way he is. You know that, Kaoru."

"Anger is one thing, but leaving bruises, _biting_ you. He crossed a line this time, Haruhi, and you know it. Mori-Senpai is furious. I don't know how you talked him out of killing Hikaru. I wanted to talk to Hikaru myself, but he left the house as soon as we got home. His jealousy is too much and it's getting worse. We have to help him get it under control. It's not healthy for either of you," Kaoru said gently.

"I know," she whispered all of her previous happy feelings disappearing with Kaoru's words.

"How are you feeling?" he asked as he began to unbutton the shirt she was wearing.

"I'm fine," she said pulling the shirt closed.

"Let me see," Kaoru said batting her hands away. "Did you clean them good?"

"No, they're just some tiny bites. It's no big deal. Will you stop making such a fuss," she said once again trying to close the shirt back up.

"No. Keep your hands away and let me look. Do you know how many germs are in a human mouth?"

"Who are you, Kyoya-Senpai now?" she said sarcastically.

"No, that's common knowledge. A dog's mouth has fewer germs than a human. So, you're going to sit still and keep your hands by your sides and I'm going to clean them. You should have done this hours ago, stupid," Kaoru said as he walked off toward her bathroom.

She glared at his back. The look was still in place as he returned with a handful of items.

"Glare all you want, Haruhi. I'm still cleaning them."

It felt odd to have Kaoru unbuttoning her shirt. Sure, he had undressed her before while helping her into some new fashion they wanted her to try on and neither twin knew any personal boundaries when it came to her or her body, but this was different. Kaoru had never undressed her when it was just the two of them.

Kaoru's fingers ghosted over her skin as he skimmed the shirt off her shoulders. He picked up some gauze, put some antiseptic on it and gently dabbed her broken skin. He put some anti bacterial cream on his fingertip and moved toward the top flesh of her breasts. His finger hovered there for just a moment before his finger slid across her skin softly applying the cream.

Kaoru's breath caught in his throat as he moved his fingers lightly over the soft swell of her breasts. Her skin was silky smooth and warm to the touch. If he dipped his finger down just an inch or so he could run his finger over her…Oh, God, his heart started hammering in his chest. Why was he torturing himself with such thoughts? Haruhi took a deep breath, which caused her chest to rise. He gasped as more of her creamy skin spilled out of the top of her camisole.

Haruhi heard kaoru's gasp and looked at him sharply. His cheeks were flushed and his breathing seemed a bit fast. Not too bad, but enough for her to notice. She gasped herself when his eyes met hers. They were beautiful as ever, as gentle as ever, but something burned within his amber depths. Something she had never seen before in Kaoru's eyes, Hikaru's, yes, Kaoru's, never. He leaned forward slightly and she was afraid he was going to kiss her. Just before she asked him what the hell he was thinking, he pulled away but not before she felt his heated breath on her skin. This was not good. She was dating Hikaru and she would never cheat on him. It was morally wrong and so she could never do that to him.

Kaoru wanted nothing more at this moment than to kiss her. He found himself leaning in to do just that when the look in her eyes stopped him. A warning was there in her big chocolate colored eyes. A look that warned she'd never forgive him if he did it and so he pulled away.

"There all done," he said as he wiped his finger on a napkin and pulled her shirt back on. He moved to rebutton the shirt, but she jumped up forcing him to move away from her.

"We better get going if we want to be there by seven," she said quickly fixing the buttons and turning off lights.

Kaoru returned her items to the medicine cabinet, washed his hands, and followed her out the door. He breathed a lung full off cool night air hoping to calm the heat surging within him. What the hell was wrong with him? Here he was condemning Hikaru for his lack of control when apparently he was just as bad. What was it about Haruhi that made them lose all sense of themselves? Hell, at times they didn't even care if they hurt each other just to have her and that was definitely a first. He had pushed his feelings aside without much difficulty in the past, so why was it now so hard to control? What was he going to do about this love that was slowly eating him up inside?

"Kaoru, we need to go," she said looking at him oddly as he remained lost in thought at the top of her staircase.

"Yeah, okay, Haruhi," he said as he swallowed down his feelings and followed her to the limo.

They sat in silence as they drove to the studio. Letting go of that weird moment with Kaoru, Haruhi felt the smile return to her face. She was going to see Hikaru and with any luck there would be no fighting. They would just have a good time doing what he did best.

She had a slight bounce in her step as she entered the studio and headed for the dressing room. A quick look at the clock told her it was seven on the dot. Her smile grew. Everything was going right for a change. As soon as she opened the door she couldn't believe her eyes. Hikaru was making out with a model she vaguely recognized. Was Kaoru in on this plan? Had she misunderstood the reason for the pity on his face earlier? A quick look at Kaoru told her he knew nothing of this. The shock on his face mirrored her own.

Shock rooted her to the floor as if she'd been nailed there. Her wide eyes took it all in. Hikaru's heated kiss, his hands roaming over the girl's bountiful chest, her fingers grasping Hikaru's hair in a death grip. When Hikaru looked at her her shock increased. His eyes. Those mischievous eyes she loved so much were hooded and glazed. A wicked smirk lifts one side of his luscious lips. Lips that were swollen from kissing another. She knew that look. She had seen it far too many times to not know it for what it was. It was his smirk of satisfaction. One he usually reserved for times of revenge. But revenge for what?

She had never cheated on him. Sure, Mori-Senpai and kaoru had both hugged her today but she never kissed anyone and she never had her hands on anyone else the way his hands were on this girl.

She felt pain in her chest and knew the moment her heart started to splinter. She wanted to scream, cry, demand answers, but she was still rooted to the floor somehow left mute by the sight before her.

Her brain was failing her. Her brain, which was so often called superior by others, the same brain that earned her entry into both Ouran Academy and Ouran University could not form a coherent thought. She struggled to think her way through the shock. If she could conjure up something, anything, even if it were just one word. And then it came. One word shining in the dark abyss of her usually busy mind. _Betrayal._

That was her only thought. She had been betrayed. She had trusted him with her heart and he had betrayed her. Funny how it took so long to form only one word but with it came a flood of emotions. Pain, anger, sadness, shock, humiliation they all vied for a place within her breaking heart. All wished to be the dominant feeling so that one of them could rule her brain and get her mouth working again.

She was called blunt many times. Was told her words were more cutting then most and yet she couldn't seem to utter a syllable if her life depended on it. The sight she walked in on began to replay itself in her mind. Her pain compounded as she recalled the gentle way his hands slide up this girl's front. _Gentle, _in a way he never was with her. Why? Why did this girl earn his gentleness when she did not?

"Hikaru," she finally choked out that one broken word. Her tears began to fall and when they did his eyes cleared of all residual pleasure and the smirk disappeared from his face. Was this just one of his games? Just like she was still nothing more than a toy to him? She felt so stupid and with that feeling came anger. Anger that was finally able to override this debilitating pain.

"Haruhi," he whispered in a cracked voice as he reached for her.

"Don't you dare touch me," she hissed jerking back from his reach. Thankfully her motor skills seemed to be returning along with her thoughts.

The beautiful girl still stood beside Hikaru a triumphant look upon her lovely face. Haruhi wanted to smack her. Instead she looked at her in disgust and said, "He's all yours," before turning on her heel and running out of the building.

"Haruhi-wait," Hikaru cried out in desperation but Kaoru grabbed him. Hikaru struggled against Kaoru's tight grip but Kaoru held firm. He had never been so angry with Hikaru before in his life.

"What the hell are you doing? First you bite her then you plan for her to see you making out with another woman."

Hikaru stopped struggling and stared at his younger brother. "She told you about the bites? Kaoru, I can explain."

"Are you listening to yourself? You know Haruhi would never tell anyone anything that happens between the two of you. Mori-Senpai saw them when he was standing over her in the Library. He text me about it. That's why the two of us were hugging. She was upset. I was upset. Mori was upset. We're worried about her. We're worried about you too, brother. What is wrong with you? Have you lost your mind?"

"Ugh!" Hikaru said pulling from Kaoru's grip to run a hand through his hair in frustration. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I just get so jealous, so possessive over Haruhi and she is as oblivious as ever. She doesn't seem to get why it bothers me so much to see other men always sniffing around her. I planned this so she could see me hugging someone else and get a taste of how I feel. But then she kissed me and I don't know why but I found myself kissing her back," Hikaru finished on a whine.

"And feeling her up," Kaoru added in anger. "Are you insane? We're talking about Haruhi, Hikaru. She is all about accountability, justice, and loyalty. Don't you remember Karuizawa? This jealousy of yours is just too much, even for her. Don't you get what you've done?"

"I have to explain this," Hikaru said as he turned to leave. Kaoru grabbed him by the arm once more. "Let me go, Kaoru. This was only supposed to be a hug. That kiss was not planned and it meant nothing. Let me go so I can explain it to her."

"Explain it," Kaoru yelled his anger far beyond even his control. "You cheated on her. Don't you get it, Hikaru? Haruhi won't forget this betrayal. She's never going to forgive you."

All the jealousy, anger, revenge that has been consuming him and boiling over for the past few months completely left him as Kaoru's words finally sunk in.

"Oh, God," Hikaru said dropping to his knees. "What have I done? Kaoru, what have I done?"

"The unforgivable," Kaoru whispered. He turned his back on his brother and ran to his waiting limousine. As soon as he jumped inside he told his driver to go to Haruhi's place slowly and to keep an eye out for her. Kaoru scanned every face on the sidewalk but none of them were Haruhi. He gave his driver instructions to check a few places he thought she might have gone to, but she was nowhere to be found. Out of ideas he went to Haruhi's apartment. He didn't think she would go some place so obvious when she would probably want to avoid Hikaru right now, but he couldn't think of anywhere else to look. He ran up her stairs two at a time and pounded on her door. She wasn't home. At least, he didn't think she was. The same lights were still off just the way she had left them. Kaoru sat down and leaned against her door. He could hear no sounds coming from inside. Had detected no movement through the window as he had pounded on the door. He pulled out his cell phone. She hadn't called him. He hadn't expected her to. That wouldn't stop him from calling until she answered.

Hikaru was still on his knees, tears threatening to spill down his face.

"Hikaru, it's alright. I'm still here." The seductive tone of the models voice made his stomach turn.

"Don't touch me," he said coldly as he pulled away from the hand she had placed on his shoulder.

"Hey, you're the one who grabbed me remember?" she said the sting of his rejection shining in her eyes.

"But you shoved your tongue down my throat you stupid bitch. It was just supposed to be a hug. You ruined everything."

"You should have never hugged me since you invited your girlfriend here and you returned my kiss, heatedly I might add and roamed around with your hands you stupid jerk."

He winced at her reminder. Why had he returned the kiss? Sure she was beautiful, but no one was more beautiful than Haruhi. Not in his eyes. Could he really just use the excuse that he was a guy and she was a girl and he couldn't help himself? He could, but Haruhi was never going to accept that. Why had he kissed her? Her mouth was warm and gentle and for some unknown reason he fell right in.

"I am a stupid jerk. Get out, I have to lock up," he said grabbing his keys. She huffed and stormed out of the building. She was a pretty good model with a great runway walk. If she refused to work for them again his mother was going to kill him. He froze midway through locking the studio. Who was he kidding his mother was going to kill him as soon as she found out what he did to Haruhi. He shuffled through the keys on his key ring and started his car. It was time to go to Haruhi's and grovel. Surely kaoru was wrong. Haruhi would forgive him, right?

Kaoru left another voice mail and swiped a hand down his face. _Where was she? Why wasn't she returning his calls? Why wasn't she turning to him for comfort in her time of need?_ And she was in need. He pulled out his phone to call the other former hosts, but he stopped. Haruhi would never expose her humiliation to any of them. He doubted she would even face him with it if he had not witnessed it for himself. That thought pained him but he knew it was the truth. He may be Haruhi's best friend but Haruhi was too independent too guarded. There were certain feelings even he was shut out from. If he called the other hosts he would have to explain why he was looking for her and then they would all know what happened. Haruhi would never forgive him.

He put his phone away and sighed. Images of the evening's events flashed across his mind. He was worried about Haruhi. She had been so upset. Kaoru had braced himself for her cutting words. He thought for sure she would pull one of her verbal sneak attacks and cut Hikaru down to size. She made Tamaki cry on a regular basis. But her cutting words never came. Hikaru's deplorable actions had rendered her speechless. Kaoru felt his anger build. How could Hikaru hurt her like that? He knew there was a part of him that would never forgive Hikaru for what he did this night. Kaoru loved Haruhi too much to grant his brother full forgiveness even if he was his twin. For the first time in his life someone else's feelings came before Hikaru's. But it wasn't just anyone. It was Haruhi.

His heart tightened in his chest. He was worried about her. Not that she would do something to harm herself. He knew she was too practical for that, but there were all kinds of crazy people roaming the street and she was a beautiful girl. She was so tiny, and so vulnerable no matter how recklessly she acted at times. He wanted nothing more than to hold her in his arms, to kiss away her pain, to run his fingers across the soft skin of her chest as he had done earlier.

He groaned as he banged his head against her door. Why couldn't he stop these thoughts?_ Because you are in love with her._ "Yes, I am," he said and his whispered longing was carried away by the breeze.

A/N (again) Sorry for the short chapter, but I felt that if I added in the aftermath it would have been waaaaay to long, so I ended it where I did. I apologize to any Hikaru fans that now find him too OOC, but people make mistakes, right. Even this lovable twin is not above them. You all know me by now, I love reviews so keep them coming. It inspires me to keep going. Arigato!


	6. Night of surprises

**Disclaimer: I will never own Ouran High School Host Club and will never make any profit off of it. It's sadly really.**

A/N: Well, I have written the action, now it's time for the reaction. Once I started thinking about it this idea just came to me so quickly I decided to type it out and get it out of my head. Thank you for your reviews last chapter, please let me know what you think about this one. I am curious to know how every one feels now that the story is moving along. I appreciate your comments.

Haruhi ran blindly out of the building. Her tears falling so quickly her contacts felt like they were going to swim right out of her eyes. She never cried, and to do so, so forcefully, so uncontrollably was not sitting well with her. But she couldn't help it. Hikaru hurt her so badly. He _betrayed _her. Her chest tightened as that word played through her mind. He had _betrayed_ her.

She would have laughed at the thought of any girl feeling this kind of heartbreak after only three short months. After all three months was no time at all in an over all lifetime. No one should have the power to hurt another in such a short span of time. But this was different. This was not just some guy she met and started dating three months ago. This was _Hikaru._ One of her best friends. A guy she trusted with her life and her heart for years now. How could he do this? How could he ask her to meet him so that she could purposely see… _Oh God!_ The tears fell heavier as she raced away from the scene of her torment begging her mind to shut down and not replay the horror Hikaru had forced on her.

"Miss Haruhi," the driver called opening the driver side door and jumping out. She either didn't hear him or chose to ignore him. He suspected the latter. Although she was not dating one of the young masters for long, he had known the petite girl for years now. She looked upset, but she was not the type of girl who used her feelings to manipulate to get attention or sympathy. If anything the young masters tried to manipulate her for years. She simply rolled her eyes at them and somehow controlled them.

The entire staff was grateful to her for that. When Haruhi was around, the devil twins who caused so much chaos to the household, were on their best behavior. They had to be. If they got out of line or carried things too far, she simply threatened to leave. That stopped them in their tracks and actually led them to _apologize_. He had never thought to see the day when those spoiled brats would lower themselves to apologize to anyone, but they did it for her.

Noticing she had gotten quite far up the sidewalk he jumped back in his seat and went to turn the key in the ignition, but he stopped suddenly. As fond as he was of Haruhi he didn't work for her. He worked for the young masters. Neither of them had come out of the building and neither had instructed him to follow her. He was worried, but after years in the Hitachiin mansion he knew his place. So he would sit and wait for one of the twins to instruct him on what do next.

Kyoya was typing on his laptop thinking about his earlier conversation with Mori-Senpai. The gentle giant was about as livid as he'd ever heard him. The fact that Hikaru was still in one piece was a testament to how much sway Haruhi had over Mori-Senpai. Over them all, really, even him, though he would never admit it out loud. Yet, here he was going over to her apartment to inspect with his own eyes that she was all right.

He sighed. His days were busy. Sleep was precious to him, but he knew that sleep would escape him this night if he didn't visit her. Talk to her. Assure himself that she was okay. It bothered him that she could cause him, Kyoya Ohtori, to worry, but she did. She always had. He laughed at himself even as he knew a tiny piece of himself resented her for making him feel any emotions at all.

He looked up trying to clear his thoughts when he thought he spotted a familiar figure rushing down the sidewalk. "Slow down," he told his driver. Once he confirmed it was her he said, "pace her," as he rolled down the window.

"Just go away!" she seethed with about as much venom as he had ever heard in her voice. He frowned. He had seen Haruhi angry many times in the past but the anger in her voice surpassed anything he had ever heard before.

He shook off his shock and regained his cool composure.

"I know you're blunt, Haruhi, but is that any way to greet one of your best friends?" he asked his trademark glare in place to reprimand her for her harsh words.

"Kyoya-Senpai?" she asked stopping and turning to him.

When she did his carefully placed composure cracked once more. Haruhi was crying. Not small tears gathered in the corners of her big brown eyes, but a waterfall cascading down her beautiful face. He gasped at the sight. He had never seen Haruhi cry. It was one of the things that separated her from all other women.

"What are you doing here?" she asked trying desperately to wipe away all traces of her tears.

"I was on my way to visit you. Get in. I'll take you home."

"I'm not going home," she said facing away from him looking for all the world like she was going to resume her power walk down the sidewalk.

"Okay, then I will take you where ever it is you are going," he said with his hand already on the door handle. He watched her for any signs that she was going to bolt. Why was she crying? Mori-Senpai made it sound like she was fine, acting like the whole thing was no big deal. In fact, Mori had been mad that she was telling him he was over reacting. So why was she so upset now? His stomach tightened. Did Hikaru do something else? Something worse?

As he studied her face he noticed her blink. Her eyes looked blank for a moment before she turned back to him.

"I don't know where I'm going?" she whispered. She sounded surprised by her own admission as if she just realized she had been walking without a destination in mind.

"I don't know where I'm going," She repeated. "I just know it's not home."

He frowned and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "Why? Why are you not going home?"

She stared at him without responding. Her face shut down struggling to clear itself of all emotions and look as if she had not been upset when he first came upon her.

He was having none of that. "Why, Haruhi?" he commanded in that Shadow King voice that others were quick to obey.

"That's the first place he'll look," she whispered looking over her shoulder as if it just dawned on her that she could be followed.

"Get in," he said opening his door for her.

She stood on the sidewalk staring at him.

"Get in," he said again.

Still she stared. He was growing angry.

"Haruhi, get in this car right now or I will get out, pick you up, and forcefully put you in it. I just know how much you will enjoy all of that attention."

A satisfied smirk graced his handsome face as he watched her scramble in the limo before he could carry out his threat. It was always a plus to know someone as well as he knew Haruhi. It helped him decide on the perfect threat for any situation.

She pinched the bridge of her nose as she sat back in the luxury seat. He smiled enjoying the act that she seemed to have picked up on that little habit of his over the years.

Haruhi tried to compose herself. Her heart was aching, the tears threatened to fall but she had to keep herself together. Of all the people to come across why did it have to be Kyoya? He was relentless in his need to know everything about everyone. Especially if it involved one of the former hosts. Damn, how was she going to talk her way out of this one?

"Where to, Master Kyoya?" the driver asked.

"Home," Kyoya said waiting for her to argue. When she didn't he looked at her more closely. She looked shell shocked. Be it from whatever had happened or his interference he didn't know, but it would serve him well. People always talked when they were a little off kilter. It was only when they had their full wits about them could a person evade questions effectively.

As usual Haruhi was not forthcoming. This didn't surprise him in the least though it did bother him. He would rather she share on her own rather than after he pried it out of her. He waited a few more moments to see if she would volunteer any information. When she didn't he sighed. Fine, if this was how she wanted it let the inquisition begin. He sought for the best way to question her. She wasn't going to like it any which way he proceeded. He pushed his guilt away reminding himself she had no one to blame but her self. If she would just talk to him he wouldn't have to push.

"Did Hikaru hurt you again?" he asked quietly.

"Hurt me? Why would you ask if he…Mori-Senpai," she muttered bitterly.

"Don't be mad at Mori-Senpai. He's just concerned about you. We all are."

She looked at him sharply a questioning look in her huge eyes.

He sighed. "Yes, Haruhi, even me. Though I would deny it if you told anyone."

She gave a small laugh as she leaned back into the seat once more.

"So, did he hurt you again?" he asked once he realized she didn't answer the question. He narrowed his eyes. He would have to watch her. She was getting too good at evading him and that would never do.

"Not physically," she answered barely above a whisper.

He whipped his head to look at her. This was apparently a night full of surprises. Not physically, which meant he hurt her emotionally? Was that even possible? Haruhi guarded herself against emotional trauma almost as carefully as he did.

"What do you mean? What happened?"

"I'd rather not go into it, Senpai," she said turning her head away from him.

"And we both know the chances of me letting this go right?" he asked looking at her.

"Kyoya, please," she said still not facing him.

"Haruhi," he said turning her head to face him. "You were _crying_. I've never seen you cry. Do you really expect me to let that go with no explanation?"

"Damn it, Kyoya," she muttered under her breath. She took a deep breath and started to spill. She told him how mad Hikaru was when he found her in Kaoru's arms in the Library. How he invited her to his studio for a photo shoot. How Kaoru picked her up. How she hoped she could explain why she was hugging Kaoru. How she hoped they could have a nice evening and make up. Then, she just stopped.

Kyoya frowned at her silence. None of this would have dissolved Haruhi to tears. He waited for her to continue but she didn't Once again she forced him to push.

"And?" he prompted as her silence continued.

"And when I walked in to the appointed room at the appointed time I found Hikaru making out with one of the models I've seen him working with before. The vengeful smirk he gave me would have done you proud, Kyoya-Senpai. So there you have it. Are you happy now?" she asked glaring at him.

He found himself fighting through his shock once more. He could hear how shaky her voice was. She was struggling to keep the tears from falling once more.

"Haruhi," he said once again regaining his composure. "Hikaru may be annoyingly immature, and he has about as much control over his emotions as a three year old, but he would never intentionally hurt you this badly. Perhaps it's a misunderstanding? Perhaps you saw wrong?"

Her deadly glare actually made him cringe back in his seat. That glare could have easily matched one of his fathers and that was saying something.

"I am not wrong. What I saw was Hikaru's tongue down that girls throat," she shouted her voice hurt his ears in the small confines of the limo. "And his hand was running all over the front of her chest which is at least twice the size of mine or more. Not that that's hard to do," she finished matter of factly.

There was no blush at her admission. No crossing her arms over her small chest. Haruhi was comfortable in her own skin. She had no insecurities about her own body. It was yet another thing in a long list that separated her from other women.

"You're the know it all with the superior analyzing skills. So, tell me which part I misunderstood, Hikaru's tongue dive or his groping?" she asked him bitterly.

He was saddened by the bitterness in her voice. While she was never all sunshine and floating flowers like Hunny-Senpai she was not a bitter person.

"Haruhi," he started, for the first time unsure how to continue. He lost all train of thought as he watched her eyes fill with tears. Her bottom lip quivered. She bit down on her lower lip as he watched her try to choke down the pain.

"Let me out." Her voice was low and shaky. "You have to let me out right now, Kyoya-Senpai."

He simply stared at her knowing he had never seen her so consumed with pain and anxiety. She reached for the door handle. That small movement brought him back to himself. He quickly grabbed her hand finding his voice.

"You know I can't do that, Haruhi."

"You must," she whispered desperately.

"Do you seriously believe I would drop you off alone in the state you're in?"

"You have to," she pleaded. "I'm at my breaking point and you're about as equipped to deal with emotions as Hikaru."

He bristled beside her. "There's no need to insult me, Haruhi. I may not enjoy emotional scenes but I can handle them much more maturely than Hikaru. You can give me some credit at least," he said his voice laced with the anger he felt.

"I'm serious. Let me out. _Now!_" she shouted.

He sighed and for the first time in his life he didn't depend on words he acted on pure instinct and pulled Haruhi onto his lap. He held her head to his chest. When she struggled to move away he simply tightened his grip.

"Just cry if you need to cry, Haruhi. I swear I won't tell anyone," he whispered into her ear.

She stiffened in his arms. A few seconds later she burst into tears. Her tiny frame trembled in his arms. He narrowed his eyes over her head. He wanted to kill Hikaru with his bear hands for hurting her like this. One hand rubbed her back; the other stroked the silky strands of her hair.

The limo pulled up in front of the Ohtori mansion. He slid across the seat and since she was so tiny it was no effort at all to stand up with her in his arms and carry her inside. He went into the study knowing his father was away on business, and sat down on the leather couch. He held her against him as she continued to cry. He placed his chin on her head breathing in her scent of cherry blossoms. He closed his eyes surprised that he felt pain because she did. A bit of that resentment boiled to the surface again. She was just lucky his love for her overrode any other emotion she made him feel.

A long time seemed to pass before her tears turned into quiet sobs. He never thought to witness Haruhi cry like that. It seemed she cried out every tear she had ever held in and she trusted him enough to do it in his arms. Any trace of resentment dissolved as a genuine smiled curved his mouth. If anyone told either of them that he would hold her gently while she cried a flood of tears they both would have laughed at them. Yet that's exactly what just happened on this night full of surprises.

When her tears stopped she pulled away completely. His arms held onto her, which pulled her shirt open slightly. He let go of her and reached for the top of her shirt.

She groaned. How many times was she going to have to go through this? She grabbed the front of her shirt closed, but like Mori and Kaoru before him he merely swatted her hands away and unbuttoned the top few buttons.

"I'm going to kill him," he said that dark aura surrounding him with every second he continued to stare at her bruises.

"You'll have to get in line," she said flatly.

She slid off his lap and sat beside him on the couch She put her head in her hands.

"No one knows you're here," Kyoya said thoughtfully.

"Good. I don't want Hikaru knowing where I am."

"I wasn't talking about Hikaru. I said no one. Surely you know Kaoru is worried about you."

She sighed knowing he was right. She couldn't find the energy to discuss anything any more. Her eyes were burning and the skin under her eyes felt raw.

"I need to use the bathroom. I'm sure I look frightful."

"You could never look frightful, Haruhi, though you could use to splash some water on your face."

"I'll be right back," she said heading toward the bathroom.

As soon as she left the room Kyoya sent a text to Kaoru. He went to put his phone away but stopped. He only hesitated a moment before sending another text to the rest of their friends.

Hikaru drove to Haruhi's apartment with a knot in his stomach. How was he going to explain that kiss when he wasn't sure himself why he kissed her? He sighed. His stomach tightened further. What if Kaoru was right? What if she never forgave him?

He raced up her stairs two at a time and stopped short when he noticed Kaoru sitting in front of her door.

"She's not here," Kaoru said his voice flat and dull.

"She's not answering her cell either," Hikaru said sitting down beside his brother. "I really messed up this time."

"Yeah, you sure did," Kaoru said no sympathy in his voice whatsoever.

"What am I going to do, Kaoru?" he asked hoping his brother had some words of comfort for him like he usually did.

"I don't know, Hikaru, and to be honest I don't know if I'd tell you even if I did."

Kaoru's phone beeped in his pocket He pulled it out hoping it was Haruhi. _Kyoya-Senpai?_ He quickly read the message, stood up, and headed toward the limo.

"Is it Haruhi?" Hikaru asked anxiously.

"No."

"Is it about her?"

Kaoru kept on walking. Hikaru was shocked that his brother didn't answer him. Then he realized he shouldn't be. No matter how much they matured, how much they tried to be more social, the world was still divided into two groups of people; 'Us' and 'Everyone else.' Once Haruhi had entered their group of 'Us' she meant as much to both of them as they meant to each other. If he weren't going to tell him where she was he would just have to follow him. He sighed starting his car making sure not to lose the limo.

Kaoru sat in the back of the limo frowning. Why was Haruhi at Kyoya-Senpai's? Why would she turn to Kyoya before turning to him? He was her best friend wasn't he? He sighed. He was furious with Hikaru for what he did to her. The thought that she was suffering alone only infuriated him more.

He couldn't wait to get to Kyoya's and see her. All anger left him at that thought. As long as he could be with her, hold her, see for himself that she was okay he would feel much better. She looked devastated when she ran out. She was going to be hurting for a while. He was determined to be there for her. It was going to be hard to be in her presence. Hard to control himself, but he would do it. He would do anything for her.

A/N (Again): Wow! I'm sorry it's usually longer between chapters. I wish I could post this quickly all the time. The idea for this chapter haunted me all day at work, and since I had some time this evening I decided to get it out of my head and post it. So, Kyoya has now made his appearance. Please let me know what you thought of this chapter. I really appreciate your input. Arigato!


	7. One of our own

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except the idea for this Fanfic! Everything else belongs to Bisco Hatori. Total genius! **

A/N: Once again thank you for the kind reviews. I feel so fortunate to have received only positive reviews. I love writing and you guys have made the whole thing that much more enjoyable. I hope this chapter isn't too disappointing. It felt a little yadda yadda boring as I was writing it, but I think of it as a transition while everyone deals with their feelings and decides how they will proceed and what they will do next.

Haruhi gasped when she saw herself in the mirror. Her eyes were puffy and her face was blotchy. She looked terrible, but did it really matter? It wasn't like there was anyone to look good for right now. Kyoya has seen her at her worst before. Actually, this was probably her worst, but he's witnessed that now too. _Ugh-of all people,_ but then she stopped her thoughts. Kyoya had actually been there for her. Had actually cared. He didn't deserve any unkind thoughts after his actions this night.

She splashed some cold water on her face and patted it dry. Her mouth felt terrible so she squeezed a bit of toothpaste on her finger, put it on her tongue and swished it in her mouth. It was nowhere near as effective as a toothbrush would have been, but she had to make due with what she had.

She checked her buttons and frowned. She was still wearing Hikaru's shirt. She looked down at it in disgust. She felt like burning it but since it probably cost more than she spent to feed herself for the month she pushed that selfish thought aside and decided to return it to him in one piece. It wasn't like she ever wanted to see it again.

Making her way back to Kyoya she fiddled with her hair wondering how much she could push him this night before he returned to the cold inconvenienced Shadow King she was secretly so fond of.

"Umm, Kyoya-Senpai, I hate to be a bother but do you happen to have a shirt I could borrow?"

Kyoya almost laughed as he watched Haruhi nervously ask him a favor. All the years he added to her debt had an impact on her. She has never so much as borrowed a quarter from him. Probably fearing some interest or condition. If he was in the mood to tease her he would ask her what she would do in return for the use of said shirt, but he was not in a teasing mood. Haruhi was too hurt and the thought of stressing her out any more didn't appeal to him in the least.

"I'm sure I can find something," he said and quickly left the room.

He returned with a dark blue dress shirt that felt even more expensive than the one she was wearing.

"Damn rich bastards," she said as she traded one shirt for the other. "A simple T-shirt would have been just fine."

"I don't own many T-shirts, Haruhi, and I would have had to dig one out. I simply grabbed what was most accessible. It is quiet big on you though," he said smiling at his shirt hanging nearly to her knees. He watched as she continued to roll the sleeves up until her hands were finally showing. He sighed. Would he ever get rid of the creases her little folding job would be putting in his shirt. No matter, it was for Haruhi. One shirt would be no loss for him.

"Har-u-hi." She heard Tamaki's over dramatic singsong voice echo through the entryway of the Ohtori mansion and froze. She glared at Kyoya.

"You swore, Senpai. You swore you would never tell anyone," she accused as she faced him.

"I swore I would never tell anyone you cried, and I haven't, Haruhi. I have all intentions of keeping that promise. I never swore to anything else," he said calmly as Tamaki continued to call out for her.

The double doors to the room were flung open with a dramatic flair and Tamaki launched himself into the room.

"Oh, my poor little girl. Fear not, Haruhi, Daddy is here to make it all better," he said as he pulled her into one of his smothering embraces. He held her tight as he rocked her back and forth in his arms. She looked around Tamaki's body making sure she gave Kyoya the harshest glare she could muster. He merely pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. The light that reflected off his lenses hiding whatever look he might be giving her in return.

"Tamaki-Senpai, get off," she said trying to push him away. In typical Tamaki fashion he merely held her tighter.

"How could you even suggestion such a thing my darling little girl. As if I could let go and abandon you in your hour of need. I'm here for you, Haruhi. You don't have to be strong right now. You just lean on me and let it all out."

"Senpai," she said but he just continued as if she hadn't spoken.

"I told you. I've been warning you for years that those devils twins would corrupt you and hurt my little girl. You should have listened to your Daddy."

"Senpai," she said a little louder but still he continued.

"When I think of the pain you must be feeling right now. When I think of how I have failed you. It pains my heart, Haruhi, truly. But it's all right. I shall not fail you again."

"_Tamaki,"_ she shouted finally stopping the young man's ranting.

"What, Haruhi?" he asked pulling back slightly but not letting go.

"Would you please get off of me? I don't need a shoulder to cry on."

He looked horrified. "But of course you do. You don't need to be strong. Those devil twins may call themselves your best friends, but you know the truth. You know that you can depend on Kyoya and myself much more than you can depend on them. We're here for you, Haruhi. You no longer have to put up this brave front."

"Tamaki, will you release Haruhi and give her some space to breath?"

"Oh my darling little girl. In my quest to comfort you I'm afraid I may have held you too tightly."

"It's fine, Senpai. All this fuss isn't really necessary," she said pulling completely out of his arms.

He began to unzip the bag that was thrown across his shoulder. "Have no fears, Haruhi. I brought just the thing to comfort you," he said as he shoved a stuffed animal against her.

"What the…?"

"It's beary. I just had to bring him along knowing you were hurting and in need of comfort."

"Are you an idiot?" she said pushing the bear back at him. "Get that away from me. Why would you bring that? I can't believe you still have that stupid thing?"

"Gah. Kyoyaaaaa," Tamaki whined. "Haruhi is being mean. She doesn't understand the importance of beary."

"I don't understand it either, Tamaki," kyoya sighed in frustration. "That stuffed bear serves no purpose put it away."

"No," Tamaki said holding the bear close. "Beary serves a grand purpose. As soon as Haruhi holds it she will understand."

"I'm not holding that, Senpai. Get it away from me," she said backing up from Tamaki's annoying insistence.

"Haruhi, just hold it."

"No."

Kyoya could see Haruhi was at her limit. Why did he text him? He had hoped his need to make every girl happy would compel him to comfort her in his gentle host like manner. He should have known better. Tamaki was never a host like gentleman around Haruhi he was his usual idiotic self.

"Tamaki, put that bear away or I'm throwing it out," Kyoya said in a cold, no nonsense voice.

Tamaki held his bear close protectively before slipping it into his bag and zipping it closed.

"Fine. If the two of you can't see the merits in bringing him you will just have to live without his comforting presence."

"That's fine by me," Haruhi said. "I can live without that just fine."

"Haruhi," Tamaki said gripping the girl once more. "Tell me what happened. I can't fix it if I don't know what took place."

"I don't need you to fix it," she said harshly trying once more to get out of his arms.

"Haru-chan," Hunny-Senpai said as he walked into the room followed by Mori-Senpai.

"Tamaki let go of me."

Before she could push at him again she felt herself being lifted in the air. Suddenly she was cradled against a firm chest as Mori held her close. He said not a word as he sat down settling her in his lap.

"Haru-chan," Hunny said tears filling his sad brown eyes.

She felt her own tears threaten at his look.

"Don't, Hunny-Senpai," she whispered in warning. He seemed to understand for he reined in his tears and climbed into her lap.

It was quite uncomfortable since he was now a few inches taller than her. He was no longer smaller than her as he had been back in the host club days. Still, a strange comfort washed over her regardless of how awkward this new position was.

Hunny placed his head against her chest as Mori wrapped his arms around the both of them. Her legs were being crushed by his weight. She wondered how Mori could stand having their combined weight on his legs, but he was much stronger than she was. He didn't seem phased by it at all.

"Oh, Haru-chan, Takashi and I were so worried when we got Kyoya's message. Are you all right?" Hunny asked his face filled with concern.

"Not really," she mumbled quietly.

"I'm sorry, Haru-chan. I'm sorry you're hurting. You can talk to us you know. We are your friends."

"I know, and I thank you, but I'm not really up to talking about it." She knew if she started telling them what happened she would start to cry. It was bad enough that Kyoya saw her tears. She had no desire to repeat the experience in front of the whole host club.

"Kyoya-Senpai, Haruhi," Kaoru called as he entered the room.

"You, how can you dare to even show your face here?" Tamaki said.

"Knock it off, Tamaki, its Kaoru," Haruhi said baffled that even the former hosts still mixed them up from time to time.

"That's not much better," Tamaki said. Every one looked at him in shock.

"What are you talking about Tama-chan?" Hunny asked. Had Kaoru helped Hikaru hurt Haruhi? He didn't want to believe that, but why was Tamaki acting this way?

"Well, we must think of Haruhi. Can you not imagine how painful it must be to look at a face identical to the one who has so recently betrayed her?"

Kaoru froze at his words. He felt a tightening in his chest. Did Haruhi feel that way? Would she avoid him because it would be too painful to see him? He didn't know if he could take that, but he had to know. He took a deep breath and looked at her.

She gently nudged Hunny-Senpai off her lap, slid out of Mori-Senpai's arms, and approached him. Relief flooded through him when he saw the tenderness in her beautiful brown eyes.

"You're wrong, Tamaki. I don't feel that way at all. Kaoru is his own person. He didn't do anything to hurt me. Hikaru did. I need Kaoru and he's here right now because he knows I need him," Haruhi said never taking her eyes off of his.

"Haruhi," he whispered. He could get no other words passed the lump that had formed in his throat.

"It's okay, Kaoru. I don't care how identical you look. When I look at your face I don't see anyone but you."

Her words broke him. This is why he loved her so unconditionally. This understanding she had of them as individuals. The love he felt for her overwhelmed him. He chocked out a sob unable to hold back regardless of the room full of men watching. He pulled her in his arms and even though he had come to comfort her she cradled him while he cried on her shoulder.

The loud knock on the door could be faintly heard in the room they were in. They all looked at each other uncomfortably. Every one knew who it was. There was only one former member of the host cub missing. Seconds later a butler entered the room.

"Master Kyoya, Mr. Hitachiin is here looking for Miss Fujioka."

Kyoya looked at Haruhi.

"I can't," she whispered tightening her grip on Kaoru. "I'm sorry to put you in an awkward position, Kyoya-Senpai, but I just can't talk to him right now."

"It's no problem, Haruhi. I would agree with you. Now does not seem the best time for the two of you to talk. Before I send him away are you sure?"

She nodded her head in confirmation. She was too afraid that if she opened her mouth her crying would start all over again.

Kyoya took a deep breath. "Hikaru is not going to be happy. I may as well get this over with."

Haruhi looked up tears filling her eyes. Kyoya was right; Hikaru was not going to be happy. Knowing him he was not going to leave until he spoke to her. Her stomach turned at that thought. She really didn't want to see him right now.

"Don't worry, Haru-chan. If you don't want to see Hikaru Takashi and me will keep him away. Takashi, do you want to be the first line of defense?"

"Hn," Mori-Senpai said and followed Kyoya out of the room closing the huge double doors behind him.

Haruhi wished she could breath out a sigh of relief, but she felt too tense.

Kyoya opened the door to a nearly distraught looking Hikaru. Remembering Haruhi's tears he was finding it difficult to feel much sympathy for him at the moment.

"Kyoya-Senpai, I need to speak to Haruhi," he said attempting to walk inside.

Kyoya stuck an arm out blocking his admittance. Hikaru looked shocked.

"And what makes you think she is here?" he asked calmly.

"I followed Kaoru here. Besides everyone else's car is here as well. I know she's inside."

"And if I told you she wasn't?" he inquired calmly.

"I'd say you were lying to me."

Kyoya sighed. "She doesn't want to see you, Hikaru."

"But I need to talk to her. Come on, Kyoya-Senpai, it's important," Hikaru said frustrated he wasn't getting his way.

"You're not seeing her," Kyoya said firmly.

"I hate to do this, Senpai, but you're leaving me no choice," Hikaru said as he pushed passed his arm and entered the Ohtori mansion.

"I'm not your only obstacle. If you are that hell bent on seeing her you'll have to get passed Mori-senpai. And if by some strange miracle you achieve that feat, Hunny-Senpai is just inside those doors. By the way, Hikaru, I wouldn't cross paths with Hunny-Senpai anytime soon if I were you."

Hikaru looked at Mori-Senpai who was guarding the doors, arms crossed with a stern, determined look on his face.

"Mori-Senpai, please," Hikaru begged knowing full well he would never get passed the angry looking giant. Kyoya was one thing; Mori was a completely different animal. Mori shook his head the line of his mouth tightening even further.

"So much for family and friendship," Hikaru muttered completely annoyed that they were stopping him from resolving this with Haruhi.

"We are your friends, Hikaru, but we are Haruhi's friends as well. You hurt her, badly, and not for the first time I understand. We would be standing by you if the roles were reversed, but they're not. You hurt her," he stated again. "She is the one who needs us right now."

"This is ridiculous. I know I hurt her that's why I need to talk to her. Don't you understand? If you were a friend to both of us you would help me apologize. If I do then she will feel better. That's what you want isn't it?"

"You don't seriously think you are going to use words to manipulate me do you? Haruhi does not wish to see you right now and I am going to ensure she gets what she wants. I repeat, we are all friends, but we joke and we tease, and we get harmless revenge on one another, but we never do anything to seriously hurt each other. We look out for one another, Hikaru, especially her. We never irreparably hurt one of our own."

"Irreparably," HIkaru whispered, shocked by Kyoya's choice of words. Mori-Senpai narrowed his eyes his anger increasing.

"Kyoya," Hikaru whined sounding annoyingly like Tamaki.

"I'm sorry, Hikaru, but for right now I must ask you to leave."

Hikaru stumbled out to his car. His mind playing the word irreparably over and over.

Kyoya entered the room to find a nervous Haruhi still held in Kaoru's arms. He had expected Hikaru to be much more explosive. The fact that he wasn't led Kyoya to believe he knew the gravity of what he had done. He kept him away from her this night as asked, whether she forgave him in the future was entirely up to Haruhi. Though he couldn't really imagine her overlooking such a betrayal. Not her.

He studied Haruhi and Kaoru as they clung to each other. He had always found the trio of friends intriguing. It was fascinating that Haruhi was able to penetrate the bubble the twins had locked themselves in. She did it though, and as the years went on the friendship among the trio only grew stronger. He used to wonder how they successfully remained friends when the twins were so spoiled and manipulative and Haruhi had no patience for such things.

Watching Kaoru hold her so gently he got his first glimpse into how the dynamics of their friendship worked. Hikaru was like the explosive stick of dynamite that blasted chaos and mischief into their lives. Haruhi was the blunt instrument that tolerated no nonsense and put Hikaru in his place with a few carefully threatening words. Hikaru and Haruhi were about as different as two people could be. It shouldn't have worked. Their friendship shouldn't have been successful and yet it was, to the point that they were best friends, practically inseparable. Now he understood why.

Kaoru was the calming waters, the Zen like garden that balanced the differences between Hikaru and Haruhi. Haruhi was the only person to successfully tell the twins apart under any circumstances. She was essential to them. The trio was indeed fascinating each providing an important element. Hikaru was the fun, the brains behind all of their crazy adventures. Kaoru was the peace, the soul that kept their feelings for each other strong. Haruhi was their savior, the heart, the glue that kept them bonded together. What would happen now that the heart of the trio was broken? Kyoya continued to ponder this until he was interrupted by Hunny-Senpai.

"So, what did he say, Kyo-chan?"

"He wasn't happy to be turned away, but I informed him that Haruhi did not wish to see him and we were not happy with his treatment of her."

"Darn right we're not. I don't know if I can ever forgive him," Tamaki said seriously.

"I know what you mean," Kyoya said remembering the trembling of her body in his arms.

"Don't do this guys," Haruhi whispered softly. "Please don't do this."

"Don't do what, Haruhi?" Tamaki asked her gently.

"Don't shut him out. Don't leave him alone with no support."

"I am too upset with him to support him right now," Tamaki said with a pout.

"But it isn't right," she said firmly. "Hikaru is a former host too. We can't all be against him."

"I'm sorry, Haru-chan, but he broke our clubs number one rule," Hunny said placing a hand on her arm.

"What rule?" she whispered. She wasn't aware of any rules.

"We don't hurt one of our own," Hunny-Senpai said in that dark voice he gets when he is feeling protective of his friends.

"Guys, I appreciate your support, I really do, but this is between Hikaru and I. This isn't just a matter of one host hurting another. We were dating, things happen, relationships don't always work out. I'm mad at him right now. Furious, in fact, but that doesn't mean I want to see him shut out. It's not fair."

"What he did to you wasn't fair, Haruhi. You don't truly expect us to just overlook it do it?" Tamaki said the passion he felt over the situation clearly in his voice.

"I just don't want to see him alone. Hikaru doesn't do being alone very well. I'm scared for him. I don't want to see anything happen to him because he does something reckless or stupid. We all know he is capable of that when he's angry or alone."

Guilt seemed to reside on all of their faces, except Kyoya, but no one said they would support Hikaru, which kind of made her angry.

"Guys, come on," she said unable to believe they would leave Hikaru out to dry.

Their faces were firm. They were not going to budge. She looked around the room wondering whom she could implore for help. Her eyes feel on Kaoru.

"Kaoru, please," she said putting her hand on his arm.

"I'm just so mad at him right now, Haruhi. For the first time in my life I don't feel like I can bring myself to talk to him."

"Then don't talk to him, but don't leave him alone. Please, Kaoru, just go home and keep an eye on him. Please. You'll never forgive yourself if he does something foolish and something happens to him. None of you will."

Kaoru knew she was right. He wouldn't forgive himself. Leave it to Haruhi to be the voice of reason.

"You're right, Haruhi. All right, I'll go home. Do you want me to drop you off on the way."

She felt a knot in her stomach not really wanting to be alone in case Hikaru decided to stop by. Before she could say anything Hunny-Senpai spoke up.

"I don't think it's a good idea for Haru-chan to be alone tonight Kao-chan. We all planned on sleeping here to keep her company. We even brought an overnight bag, right Takashi?"

"What?" Kyoya said. "Why does my home have to become the place for this impromptu sleep over?"

"Because this is where you brought Haruhi and you called us to come over."

"No, I called you to inform you of the situation."

"You knew we would come, Kyo-chan."

He sighed. "Fine, sleep over if you want. I'll have the maids get some rooms ready."

"You don't use multiple rooms for a sleep over, Kyo-chan. The fun part is sleeping on the floor all together in the same room."

"Well count me out," Kyoya said firmly. "I get too little sleep as it is and I am not parting with my bed for any sleep over with all of you."

"But don't you want to be there for Haru-chan too?" Hunny said with a pout trying to make Kyoya feel guilty for abandoning their friend.

If it was anyone else Kyoya would have never been persuaded by Hunny-Senpai's words, but it was to support Haruhi and he knew first hand how much she was hurting. Only for her would he make this concession.

"Fine," he said in defeat. "But this so called sleep over will take place in my bedroom. I still have no intention of giving up my bed."

"Yay! Sleep over, sleep over," Hunny said jumping up and down excitedly.

"Uh, guys this is really not necessary. We shouldn't put Kyoya-Senpai out like this." She wasn't sure how she felt about this sleep over idea.

"Don't be silly, Haru-chan, we aren't leaving you alone and Kyoya has already agreed."

"But I wasn't prepared for a sleep over," she said looking down at her borrowed shirt and tight jeans.

"I've got you covered, Haru-chan," Hunny said with his big smile plastered on his face. "I thought ahead, right Takashi? You're going to look adorable in my shorts that I've packed for you aaaand I packed you a brand new toothbrush as well."

She sighed. These guys were too much. No matter how many years passed since the host club ended these guys had no intention of disbanding. She was stuck with them. Even though they were crazy and made irrational decisions for her without ever asking, she was comforted that she would always have their support. They may be a crazy overbearing group of friends but they were hers.

"I feel like I should stay," Kaoru said feeling left out. Especially if a sleep over with Haruhi was involved.

She looked at him sadly. She knew he wanted to stay but she couldn't allow him too.

"Kaoru, I'll have a sleep over with you some other time. You need to keep an eye on your brother. Please, "she said pleading with him to understand.

"You promise?" he asked "You promise to have a sleep over with me?"

"Yes. I promise. I may not like Hikaru very much right now but I don't want him left alone to deal with his emotions. He struggles with them with support. Who knows what he'll do with it."

"All right, Haruhi," he said knowing she was right. He didn't really want to leave Hikaru on his own either, but he was torn. He didn't want to leave Haruhi either. He looked around at their group of friends and although he was jealous that they got this time with her he was glad she was not alone. The same could not be said of Hikaru. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"I'll walk you out," she said. He took her hand in his and after saying good-bye to everyone they walked outside.

"I feel like I'm abandoning you. I feel like a terrible friend," he said leaning against the limo.

"You need to be a brother more than a friend right now. I know how you feel, Kaoru, I know you want to be here. You have no idea what that means to me but as angry as I am with Hikaru I just can't stand the thought of him being alone. "

"He is a fool to have hurt you when you care so much about him. Even now you care, thank you for that, Haruhi," he said pulling the girl in his arms.

He knew she was mad. He knew she was hurt. He had seen it on her face when they walked in on that stupid plan of Hikaru's and still she cared about him, worried about him. Hikaru was an idiot.

Her warmth penetrated his thoughts. Her small body was pressed against his own. Her earlier words whispered through his mind _when I look at your face I don't see anyone but you._ Tears stung his eyes and that lump returned to his throat. This tiny woman was the only person in the world who made him feel special. Who saw Kaoru and nothing more. He tightened his hold on her. Love and lust filled equal parts of him as heat raced through his body. He wanted her. He wanted to be there for her but once again he was pushing his wants aside for his brother needs. Would he ever be able to be just Kaoru and not a twin?

A/N (Again): I am sooooo sorry this chapter turned out to be so long. I also want to apologize for not wrapping up the whole transition phase in just one chapter. There is something about this story and the deep relationship between all the hosts that once I get writing all their reactions race through my head and I feel like I'm saying too much. Please bear with me through one more transition chapter of feelings and then we will get back to the good stuff. I appreciate your patience and your comments. Please keep both coming. Arigato!


	8. It hurts

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Ouran High School Host Club. Sob :( That honor does and always will belong to Bisco Hatori. Please support the original Mangas. They are awesome and tell a much more detailed story than what the anime was able to show!**

A/N: I'm sorry it took a while to post. I've been crazy busy! Well, here is the next chapter. Please let me know what you think of it. I truly look forward to your input. I especially enjoy your thoughts on how the characters are portrayed. I am trying to keep them in character but it's not always possible with a fanfic. Enjoy!

Haruhi woke up with a slight headache and a heavy pressure on her chest. She felt a bit uneasy. Could heartbreak cause a serious heart problem? Was she in trouble since her chest felt so heavy? Should she be worried? She blinked her eyes trying to focus her vision without her contacts. Her eyes felt puffy and sore. As her vision cleared she frowned. Why was she face to face with something that looked an awful lot like Usa-chan?

It was Usa-chan staring back at her. The question was why? As her other senses began to fully wake up she became aware of several things at once. Usa-chan was in her face, Hunny-Senpai was curled up against her front with only his stuffed rabbit between them, and an arm had a viselike grip around her chest from behind. She breathed a sigh of relief. That explained the heavy feeling but whose arm was it? She tensed as she realized it was Mori-Senpai's arm and that wasn't the only part of him touching her. She soon become aware that he was spooning her smaller body against his much larger one. She woke up in this position many times with the twins, minus Usa-chan, but never with the two older former hosts. How the hell did she end up in this position with them?

_The sleep over!_ The words whispered through her mind as she recalled each one of last night's horrific events. She had feared she would never get to sleep. She remembered Mori –Senpai finding her leaning against one of the windows looking out into the night. She didn't say a word. He didn't push her to say anything. He merely sat there supporting her with his faithful presence. Hours must have passed but he stayed by her side. The last thing she remembered was finally feeling sleepy. Mori-Senpai must have carried her to her spot between him and Hunny-Senpai. How could she ever repay them for their support? She would think of something.

She had to get home to shower. She had classes to get to. The problem was how to dislodge herself from Mori-Senpai's iron hold. She hated to wake him knowing she kept him up more than half the night but she really needed to get going. She began to wiggle out of his arm. It went painstakingly slow. She succeeded in freeing herself an inch at a time. Mori frowned and grunted, but rolled on his back and remained asleep. Hunny tightened his grip on Usa-chan.

Haruhi froze when she banged her shin into Kyoya-Senpai's bed. If there was one person in this room that she had no desire to disturb it was Kyoya. He was a notoriously nasty riser. She backed up slowly relief coursing through her when he didn't move a muscle. She wrote a quick note thanking them for everything they had done for her. She ended it with a promise for a home cooked meal as thanks, and headed toward the door.

"Good Morning, Miss Haruhi." The man's voice was pleasant enough but his face was made of stone.

"Good Morning, Tachibana," Haruhi said smiling at the bodyguard she was most familiar with.

"Would you be needing a ride home?" he asked politely.

"No, that's okay. I'll be fine," She said.

He cracked a small smile. "It wasn't truly a question, Miss Haruhi, I insist," he said holding the door open for her.

"Thank you," she whispered and followed him out to the car.

She was digging her keys out of her bag as she climbed her steps. Her back was kinked up from her night on the floor, and her head still had that faint drumbeat she woke up with. She froze on the landing as she watched Hikaru stand from his place on the ground outside her door.

Anger surged through her. How dare he show up at her apartment. He knows her well enough to know she would not want to see him. She took a deep breath to vent out her anger, but she stopped herself just in time. Hikaru loved a good fight. He enjoyed arguments. He was here with one purpose in mind. He wanted to get her angry, to get her screaming. He wanted to fight it out and move on to making up. She clamped her lips shut. She'd be damned if she gave him what he wanted. She didn't know what to do. Didn't know what to say to him. Then it dawned on her and when it did she could have smiled. Hikaru craved attention. He needed it. The worst thing she could do was ignore him. Hikaru hated to be ignored. So, that's exactly what she did.

"Haruhi, please, we need to talk," he whispered only one step behind her.

She tried to close the door in his face but he was too quick for her. She spun around planning on telling him to get out but once again she stopped herself. She cleared her face of any emotion and looked passed him as if he weren't even there. She caught his eyes widen in surprise just as she saw the anger building in him as she moved through her morning as if he weren't following her every move.

"Haruhi, come on, say something," he demanded just before she slammed the door to her bathroom. She locked the door before he could slide it open. She stepped in the hot spray of water thankful that the sound drowned out all of the pleading coming from the other side of the door.

She continued to ignore him as he switched back and forth between pleading and yelling. She ignored him as he followed her around her house, as he followed her to school, as he sat beside her in class. She was relieved when Kaoru walked in. The tension between her and Hikaru was smothering.

"Hey, Kaoru," Hikaru said testing how angry his brother still was with him. He had heard him return to the mansion last night and retreat to his room. Kaoru didn't say a word to him, but he seemed to appear in every room Hikaru went into. Hikaru inwardly smiled. Kaoru may be mad at him but it didn't stop him from worrying and keeping an eye on him. For that he was extremely grateful. Now if he could get them to talk to him things could get back to normal.

"Hikaru," Kaoru said coldy but at least he acknowledged him. That was more than he was getting from Haruhi.

"Morning, Haruhi, how are you?" Kaoru asked quietly as he took his seat beside her.

"I'm hanging in there," she said in return.

"How was the sleep over?"

She sighed. "Fine other than the ridiculous bunny shorts Hunny-Senpai packed for me to wear. Oh, and waking up with Usa-chan in my face."

Kaoru laughed at her description while Hikaru seethed on her other side. He inwardly smirked at Haruhi's cleverness. She was ignoring Hikaru. If she was angry enough to want to pay him back for last night there was no better punishment. Hikaru _hated _to be ignored. _Good for you, Haruhi._

"Hey, Kaoru, would you like to come over to study later? We have exams coming up and I really need to get serious about them," she said.

"Kaoru can't come over," Hikaru said from behind her. "Haruhi, we need to talk."

"So, can you?" she asked as if Hikaru hadn't even spoken.

"Damn it, Haruhi, that's enough. I get it. You're punishing me. Fine, consider me punished."

She said nothing as she continued to stare at Kaoru. Kaoru didn't really like being in the middle. He never liked confrontation, especially if it put him between these two. The only two people in the world he never wanted to fight with, but right now he was placed in that awful position. He could see the apology in her eyes for putting him there, but he could also see her pain, her fear. She didn't want to be alone.

"Sure, Haruhi, I need to study too," he answered. Hikaru looked furious.

"Helllllo, I need to study too, so I guess the three of us will work together then Haruhi and I can talk?"

He looked at Haruhi's profile hopefully, but the girl didn't even glance in his direction.

"Come on, Haruhi, I can't take it any more," Hikaru said his voice rising.

"Ah, so eager for class, HItachiin-san, but now that I'm here could you please remain quiet. Most of this lecture will be needed for the final," their Professor said taking a seat at his desk.

Hikaru stewed in his seat as Haruhi looked straight ahead as if she'd been carved into that position. Kaoru sighed not knowing how to help either of them.

Kaoru didn't expect the stand off to last this long but then again they were both extremely stubborn. For four days now Haruhi had not said one word to Hikaru. She didn't even spare him a glance. At first Hikaru was angry, but as the days went on it was clear that Haruhi was not going to forgive him. Hikaru was now growing desperate.

Every once in a while Kaoru would give his shoulder a pat or a squeeze, but it was hard for him to offer more than that when he was faced with Haruhi's pain every day. Since she was so independent she didn't ask him for his comfort but she silently sought it through small gestures; a slight lean into his side, a quick hug she would give out of nowhere, and the silent pleading with those large sad eyes. Those eyes. They were his undoing. They were the reason he could not fully comfort his brother. How could he support the man who caused her such pain?

Kaoru stood in the doorway watching Hikaru pace back and forth muttering to himself. He wanted to reach out to him, but he was so mad at him for what he did to Haruhi that he just couldn't find a way to do it.

"This totally sucks," Hikaru muttered running his hands through his hair.

"It sucks for Haruhi too," Kaoru said.

Hikaru spun around facing his brother. "Kaoru, you have to help me. Tell me what to do? I can't even think straight anymore."

"Haruhi can't concentrate either and finals are only a week away."

"I don't know what to do. You've seen how she's acting. She won't even look at me."

"She's not eating much either," Kaoru said seeing how Hikaru would react.

"I can't even think about food. The only thing I can think about is this ache in my chest. Help me make it go away, Kaoru," Hikaru pleaded as if he hadn't even spoken about Haruhi's suffering.

"I've noticed the dark coloring under Haruhi's eyes. That leads me to believe she isn't sleeping much either."

"I can't sleep at all. I feel terrible. Haruhi won't let me near her. I haven't been able to touch her in over five days. You know how that feels, Kaoru. I feel like when you get a cold that goes to your chest. You know you're still breathing but it's not a full breath so that tight feeling just remains in your chest. Kaoru, if you could just…"

"Ugh! Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Kaoru yelled not being able to stand his brothers voice for another moment. "Do you even hear yourself? Do you even care about how Haruhi feels at all? Maybe you would if you had seen her that night."

Hikaru stared at Kaoru in shock. "I saw her that night. I 'll never forget the look on her face as she ran out the door."

"I'm not talking about how she looked during your moment of epic stupidity. I'm talking about how she looked when the shock wore off. When the pain set in. Her eyes were red and puffy. She was definitely crying, Hikaru, _crying._ Her body was trembling, and her eyes were so sad. She looked even more sad then when she talks about how much she misses her mom."

Hikaru stared at him in shock as if he had no idea she was hurting too. That infuriated him. "Ugh! You broke her heart, HIkaru and you don't even care!"

"Don't say I don't care. Why would you say I don't care?" Hikaru asked defensively.

"Because you haven't once asked how she is doing. You haven't once tried to give her some space. Do you even realize that the only time you mentioned Haruhi's name was to point out what she _won't_ do for you? I've been telling you for years that you need to consider other people's feelings, but you're still too selfish to do that."

"Kaoru, I…."

But Kaoru was too angry so he continued on. "We are not in high school anymore. We are adults, in adult relationships. You planned to hurt her and even after you succeeded you don't care."

"I do care!" Hikaru shouted back.

"No you don't. Your words have made that quite clear. You're not asking about her. The only thing you can wrap your brain around is getting what you want."

"You-you're wrong," Hikaru said defensive once more.

"No I'm not. I see it exactly how it is. Do you want me to tell you?"

"Oh, please, enlighten me," Hikaru said sarcastically.

"I will. You and Haruhi are only on the same page about one thing; both of you are only worried about Hikaru!" With that Kaoru walked out of the room. He couldn't stand to even look at him right now.

Hikaru resumed his pacing. _Stupid, Kaoru!_ What did he know? He was thinking about Haruhi. She was all he was thinking about. Wasn't she?

Kaoru stomped down the hall and slammed his door. _Selfish jerk!_ How was he supposed to comfort him? To help him try to ease Haruhi's pain when he never even asked about her? She asked the former hosts, begged them not to shut Hikaru out, and the only thing his brother could think about was himself.

Kaoru sighed. He hoped this ended soon though he saw no end in sight. He wasn't sure how much more he could take before he himself snapped and did something Haruhi would find completely inappropriate. With every touch, with every hug, with every look he fell harder for her. Before this nightmare that Hikaru had created he knew he was in trouble, knew he was in love but now he was in deep on both counts.

Haruhi had to go to the Library. She was growing progressively more annoyed. Hikaru followed her around whispering for her to forgive him. To just give him a chance to explain. As if anything he had to say could explain his tongue wrestling with that models. _idiot_. She had just grabbed the book off the shelf when the volume of Hikaru's voice startled her.

"Damn it, Haruhi, don't you think this is enough?" He spun her around and leaned forward to kiss her. She dropped the book on the floor so she could cover his mouth with her hand.

"Don't you dare kiss me," she hissed looking at him with all the anger she was feeling. "Go kiss your model with the rack."

Hikaru was not pleased by her words but he felt a small victory for at least getting her to talk to him.

"Haruhi," he said his voice muffled under her hand. He pulled her hand away and latched onto her wrist. "I don't want to kiss her."

"That's not how it looked to me," she spit back.

"I just wanted to hug her so that you could understand how I feel when other men try to get all over you. I didn't expect her to kiss me," he said trying to stress that point.

"You weren't standing there helplessly in shock. You kissed her back," she said harshly.

"I know what you saw and I know how it must have looked, but I swear I don't want to kiss her."

"And I don't want to kiss you, so where does that leave us, Hikaru?"

He looked shocked, he was expecting her to be angry but not expecting her to refuse his kiss.

"We need to talk," he whispered hoping he would finally get a chance to explain.

"I have nothing to say," she said flatly.

The tone of her voice scared him more than the words she spoke. What if she truly never forgave him? How could he go on?

"Well, I have a lot to say," he informed her.

"I'm not interested, Hikaru. Please just leave me alone."

"No," he said seriously.

"I'm serious leave me alone," she said a bit louder than she should have considering they were in the Library.

She felt a heavy hand on her shoulder and a body appear at her side.

Hikaru narrowed his eyes at Mori and Hunny –Senpai. "Hey, could you guys give us a minute?"

Mori shook his head no and tightened his grip on her shoulder.

"This isn't really your business, Mori-Senpai." Hikaru said as calmly as he could to their giant sized friend.

"Haru-chan, do you want to be alone with him?' Hunny asked her sweetly.

"No," she said without hesitation.

"She said no, Hika-chan, that makes it our business," Hunny said all sweetness gone from his voice.

Hikaru looked pissed but he wasn't stupid. He spun on his heel and walked away. _How dare they interfere when he finally got Haruhi to talk to him._ Wait. Haruhi was talking to him again. A small feeling of relief coursed through him. This was just the beginning. He would talk more to her later. They would eventually straighten things out. Right?

"Thanks guys," she said quietly and picked up the book she had dropped.

"No problem Haru-chan," Hunny said. "I have a question."

"What is it, Hunny-Senpai?"

"When can me and Takashi come over for that home made dinner you promised in your note? It's been a long time since we had your cooking. We are really looking forward to it, right Takashi?"

"Yeah," Mori-Senpai said with a slight smile on his face.

"Does tonight work for you?" she asked.

"Tonight is perfect. What time?"

"Umm, seven," she said looking to see if that time worked for them.

"Great. We'll see you at seven, Haru-chan, and don't worry we'll bring desert."

Hikaru walked inside the mansion to find Kaoru eating an early dinner with their parents.

"Come join us, Hikaru," his father said.

Hikaru sat down wondering if their parents could feel the tension between him and Kaoru.

"So, where has Haruhi been? I've been home for three days now and I haven't seen her at all. I have some new outfits I've designed for her and I can't wait to dress her up and see how adorable she looks in them," Mrs. Hitachiin said with that excited look she gets every time she talks about one of her new desgins.

"She….I," Hikaru stopped not wanting to share what happened with his mother. Especially after Haruhi's most recent rejection of him.

His mother stared at him sharply. Frowning at his uncharacteristic inability to finish a sentence.

"Did something happen? Oh, no, don't tell me you were stupid enough to break up with our dear girl?"

Hikaru looked at his mother. He could feel the weight of Kaoru's stare as he waited for him to explain himself to their mom. He was too upset right now to deal with how his mother was going to react.

"I-I don't want to talk about it," he said leaving the room in a hurry.

"What's going on?" she asked staring at Kaoru. Normally he would defend his brother and shrug his shoulders as if he didn't know. But he couldn't pretend he didn't know. Couldn't pretend it wasn't tearing him apart that Haruhi was in pain.

"He hurt her," he admitted quietly.

"Hurt her? How could anyone want to hurt our beautiful little doll?"

Kaoru said nothing not sure he wanted to deal with his mothers outburst once she found out.

"Physically or emotionally?" she asked once she realized Kaoru was not going to continue without prompting.

"Both," he said.

Disbelief crossed her lovely face only to be replaced by anger.

"He hit her," she said outraged by the mere thought. "I know I was always busy running my fashion industry, but I know I raised you both better than that."

"He didn't hit her. He just got a little rough while they were…"

"That's enough," his mother said without letting him finish. One perfectly polished hand raised to stop his words. She looked like she could kill Hikaru.

She gulped half her glass of wine before looking at Kaoru once more. "And the emotional pain?"

He took a deep breath then told her of Hikaru's growing jealousy, what he had planned to do with a model to make Haruhi jealous so she would understand how he felt, and how Haruhi reacted to what they actually walked in on.

"That was his reason for calling me for a model? I really could kill that boy right now. How is Haruhi?" she enquired gently. Their mother was not a gentle woman but she always softened when Haruhi was involved. Haruhi changed their mother just as she had changed them.

"He broke her heart, Mom, and I don't know how to make her feel better," he said sadly wondering if his mother would have any words of advice.

"What an idiot," their mother said then a smirk crossed her face. "I know the perfect punishment."

Kaoru looked at her.

"He is going to work with me over winter break. I won't give him a moments rest. Oh, and Kaoru dear, I expect you to comfort our precious Haruhi."

"I don't think that's such a good idea," he whispered his face heating in shame.

"Why not?" she asked surprised by this admission.

He was unsure of what to say, so he said nothing.

"Kaoru?"

"I'm so confused," he admitted quietly.

"About what?"

"About everything. About all of it. For the first time in my life someone else is more important than Hikaru. It makes me feel like a terrible twin. I feel like I'm betraying him, but I'm so upset with him for hurting her I can't bring my self to comfort him. I tried this afternoon but he's not even thinking about her. He's too consumed with himself. And then there's Haruhi," he whispered softly.

"Ah, she is so independent. Is it bothering you that she is not seeking you out for comfort?"

"She would never ask for it directly but she is turning to me. She is leaning on me."

"I thought that would please you."

"It would if….if I didn't want her so badly. If I wasn't so desperately in love with her. I don't want to hurt Hikaru. I don't want to ruin my friendship with Haruhi but I don't know how much longer I can go on before my feelings just come pouring out. I don't want to distance myself from her but I don't want to freak her out either. That's why I'm not sure it's a good idea to keep closely comforting her as you asked."

"Kaoru, Haruhi is very special to all of us. Do you know it is through her that I learned how to tell the two of you apart? I admit I am not always successful like she is but you must say I've gotten a lot better. Through her I saw you two the way she sees you. Through her I learned that Hikaru's biggest fault is his selfishness and your biggest fault is your self_less_ness. Haruhi is special. She has had a tough life and she is fighting for her future. She deserves to be happy. _You _deserve to be happy."

His mother's words gave him hope, but the feeling didn't last for long. "But neither of us wants to hurt Hikaru."

"Did you ever think that you might be doing him a favor?"

"Huh?"

"Hikaru needs this lesson to grow up. He has always had to learn his lessons the hard way. I'm not saying he won't be hurt, but he hasn't been a very good boyfriend to Haruhi. In the long run this will make him a better man. A better boyfriend for whoever he may be destined for."

"I don't even know how Haruhi feels about me apart from knowing I'm her best friend."

"Perhaps it's time you found out. That of course is for you to decide. In the mean time I'm counting on you. She needs you, Kaoru."

Kaoru pushed his food around his plate thinking about his mother's words.

"Haru-chan, we're here," Hunny-Senpai said through her door just as she was putting the meal out on the table.

As soon as they walked inside Hunny smiled his big wide sweet smile.

"Oh, Haru-chan, everything looks delicious and you made so much," he said eyeing the table full of food.

"Hn," Mori said looking over the food with a pleasant smile on his face.

Mori and Haruhi sat quietly as they ate while Hunny filled in all the empty spaces with his nonstop happy chatter.

"That meal was delicious," Hunny said as he put down his chopsticks and rubbed his belly.

"Yes," Mori agreed. "But you look tired."

Hunny looked at her his smile fell from his face. "Haru-chan, you should have told us you were tired. I love your cooking and couldn't wait to taste it again but I feel bad that I mentioned it if it was going to put you out."

"Don't feel that way, Hunny-Senpai. I was glad to have something to occupy my thoughts and time. If it was too much I would have told you."

"Are you sleeping?" Mori asked looking concerned.

"A little bit," she said quietly. "I just have so much studying and I can't concentrate like I usually can. Hikaru keeps showing up at the Library or here trying to force me to talk to him. As if anything he says could ever change what I saw with my own eyes."

"You know, Haru-chan, you can't avoid him forever."

"I know but he doesn't really want to talk. He says he does but he really just wants to kiss me until I forget that I'm angry. He wants to avoid the whole thing and pick up where we left off as if it never happened. That won't work this time. Not after seeing him…do those things with another girl."

"You need to talk to him so you can focus on your work. It's not good for you to lose too much sleep, Haru-chan, and I didn't want to mention it but you didn't eat that much even though you cooked all this food. You can always call us if it gets to be too much. You're like a sister to both of us," Hunny said a sad look on his face.

Mori shook his head in agreement. "We can help you study too."

"Thanks guys. That means a lot to me."

"Anything for you, Haru-chan."

After they left Haruhi picked up her cell phone. She put it down several times only to pick it back up again.

"_Ugh! You are not weak. Send the text and get it over with._ The guys were right. She needed to focus on finals. She would not allow Hikaru's idiotic actions ruin her future. She took a deep breath and started to type a message to Hikaru.

**Hey could you meet me at the bench beneath the cherry blossoms after last class tomorrow?**

**Of course. I'll see you then and thank you.**

_Don't be thanking me yet,_ Haruhi thought, but she didn't bother to answer. She had no desire to keep the texting going although she missed it. They used to text some long crazy conversations in the past and she missed them. She headed toward the bathroom to draw herself a bath. She would block out thoughts of Hikaru as best she could for tonight.

As Haruhi approached the bench she saw that Hikaru was already there. She sat beside him wondering what she was supposed to say now that she asked him here. She had meant it when she said she wasn't interested in talking to him. And she had meant it when she said she had nothing to say in return. She knew Hunny-Senpai was right though. They couldn't continue on as they had been. It was too distracting for the both of them.

"I'm sorry," Hikaru said breaking the silence.

"And I'm sure a privileged guy like you who is used to getting what he wants expects a commoner like me to accept those words and be grateful you lowered yourself enough to even utter them?"

He winced at her blunt reply.

"No. Haruhi, I haven't thought of you as a commoner for a couple of years now. You know that. I only said it because I really am sorry. I just let my jealousy get the better of me. You of all people know how I am."

"When have I ever given you a reason not to trust me? When have I ever done anything that could be seen as betraying you?"

"Never. I know that. I'm an idiot, Haruhi. I made a mistake. I swear that kiss meant nothing."

"That's where you're wrong," she whispered tears swimming in her eyes. She looked right at him. "We were each others first kiss, well, at least the first kiss from the opposite sex. That really meant something to me even if it didn't to you."

"It did. It does," he said desperately.

"Not enough to keep you from giving your lips to another and your hands….your hands were roaming over her….and you were so gentle."

"I'm sorry, Haruhi," he said. She could see his own eyes filling with tears but she steeled herself against them. She was hurt damn it. She was not going to be swayed by his tears.

"Why, Hikaru? Why did you kiss her back?" She dared ask the question that has been plaguing her since she saw them that night.

"I-I don't know," he whispered.

"Not good enough," she said allowing the anger she felt to replace the sadness in her voice.

"_I don't know!_ We were hugging and then she kissed me and then I must have acted on instinct because…."

"Instinct? So you put no thought behind what you were doing? Made no attempt to think about me and push her away? That's what I mean to you? I don't deserve a thought, some loyalty?"

"No. You mean everything to me. Please, Haruhi, I'm really sorry."

"I don't mean anything to you. If I did you never would have set it up for me too find you even hugging another girl in the first place let alone kiss her, touch her. Honestly, Hikaru, I'm not sure which part was worse the fact that you willingly gave your lips to someone else or the gentle way you touched her. You were gentle with her, a stranger but you're so rough with me that you leave bruises every time you touch me. That's how you treat the person who means everything to you?'

"Haruhi, I'm sorry I…I never mean to bruise you. I just get so jealous that my anger overtakes me. Don't you get it? I felt no anger with that stupid girl because she means nothing to me. She can't whip up my emotions like you can."

"Then I'd rather mean nothing to you if it meant I could be touched by you the way you were touching her."

He looked horrified. "Don't say that. You could never mean nothing to me. Please, Haruhi, I'm begging you, please forgive me."

"I can't," she whispered. They were hard words to say, but she said them.

"What?" he asked hoping he didn't hear her right. "You can. You can forgive me. I mean it's not like I slept with her."

"You freak out when another guy _talks _to me and know you will sit here and say a kiss and a feel aren't a betrayal? Well, you're wrong, Hikaru. You betrayed my trust and me. You know me. I can't forgive that. Now that you had your chance to talk, now that you know how I feel I need you to leave me alone. I need to concentrate on my finals. If I don't keep my grades up I'll lose my scholarship and I'm not throwing away my goal, my future, for anyone. Not even you."

"Haruhi, I-I love you," he said a few tears sliding down his cheeks.

Her chest tightened at the sight and once again she had to strengthen her resolve. It wasn't hard since her mind chose that moment to let a passing image of Hikaru and that girl fly through her thoughts.

"You love yourself and your petty revenge more. You always have. You haven't grown up at all," she said standing up.

"Haruhi." He stood quickly as well.

"It's over, Hikaru," she said and turned and walked away. She heard Hikaru curse just before he kicked a garbage can and sent it flying.

As soon as she was a safe distance away she began to run. She couldn't hold the tears back any longer but she'd be damned if he was going to see her cry even one more over him. He had seen enough the night he _chose_ to betray her. Running blind she banged into someone so hard she bounced off of them. Hands gripped her upper arms before she could fall back from the impact.

Kaoru was walking through the campus looking for Haruhi when she literally ran right into him. The force was so strong it actually pushed him back a step but it was much more forceful to her tiny frame. He reached out and grabbed her before she could fall.

"Haruhi," he said wondering why she was running.

"Kaoru," she whispered as she looked up at him with tears pooled in her eyes. He didn't know which held more pain the sound of her voice or the look in her eyes.

"Haruhi, Why are you…"

"Kaoru," she whispered again pleading with him to understand that she would not, could not answer his question here in the open.

"Let's go," he said gently. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and held her close as he rushed them to his waiting limousine.

Once inside she crawled in his lap and gripped the front of his shirt.

"Just drive around," he said to the driver. He didn't want to go home since he suspected HIkaru was the cause of this. The last thing she needed was to see him.

"What's wrong?" he asked as he encircled her with his arms and pulled her close.

"I made our breakup official by telling him it was over. He begged me to forgive him but I just can't."

Her tears fell heavier now her voice choked with emotion.

"I can't forgive him. I can't. Do you know what that means?" she asked forcing the words out between her sobs. "It means that I'm in pain either way. I can't forgive him but if I don't forgive him than we can't stay friends. It-it hurts. It-it-hurts-so-so much."

He sighed as he held her. He hated to see her like this.

"Do-do you know what he said when I-I asked him why he kissed her back?"

"No."

"He said he did i-it on instinct. He gave it no thought at all. He-he couldn't even spare me a thought."

Anger raced through him as he listened to her words. Words she could barely get out of her mouth. How could Hikaru say that to her? How could he do that to her?

"It hurts, Kaoru. It hurts so much. A part of me never wants to see him again and another part of me knows I won't survive if I lose his friendship. How could I love such a selfish man?"

_Selfish._ That seemed to be the word of the day. He said it to Hikaru, his mother said it to him, and now Haruhi said it as well. Damn, Hikaru. He really was selfish.

"It hurts, Kaoru, please, tell me what to do to make it stop hurting."

His heart tightened in his chest. If he could take away her pain he would but he didn't know how. He felt so helpless.

"I don't know. I don't know how to make it go away. The only thing I do know is that you are not alone. You will never be alone. I'm here for you. Always."

Her grip tightened on his shirt. "I love you, Kaoru," she whispered snuggling in closer to him.

"I love you, too," he whispered in return.

He ran his hand through her hair. Her Jasmine scent filled the confines of the limo. Her tiny body felt cold as she pressed herself against him for warmth and comfort. Her curves were teasing him completely. _Oh, Haruhi, if only you could say 'I'm _in_ love with you' than maybe we could both stop hurting._

A/N: (again): Well, there's chapter 8. I'm curious to hear what everyone thought. This chapter was nerve-wracking. I apologize to anyone who hoped that Hikaru and Haruhi would resolve their differences this chapter. Please, please, please, let me know what you thought. I would love to know how everyone feels about the direction the story is heading in. I appreciate your time and input. Arigato!


	9. Sleep over with Kaoru

**Disclaimer: I do not own…you know the drill. Only Bisco Hatori can claim any rights to this.**

A/N: You guys are amazing! Thank you so much for the awesome reviews. I seriously appreciate each and every one. When people say they can't wait for the next chapter it truly inspires me to get back to typing. **This chapter contains a lemon! Nothing too graphic but it is there and it is more than implied. **I did state that in the summary but if this is not your thing you have been warned. So, here we go. Enjoy!

True to their word Mori-Senpai and Hunny –Senpai did help her study. Kaoru helped her with the classes they had together. Hikaru still stared at her in class, and he still waited for her outside classrooms and the Library, but when she kept on walking he did not follow. She was grateful for it even as the separation pained her.

Since she was a meticulous note taker she normally had no problem studying on her own, but these were not normal times. She not only needed help focusing, but constantly being surrounded by friends created a wonderful distraction from the emptiness inside. She was also relieved when Hunny told her that he and Mori were checking up on HIkaru. She knew she couldn't have gotten through this alone, and she was glad Hikaru didn't have to either.

"Haruhi, what's wrong?" Kaoru asked her when he noticed the sad look on her face. "There is no way you failed finals with all the studying you did."

"You're right. I passed with flying colors thanks to you guys. My scholarship is still secure."

"Then why do you look so sad?" he asked her gently.

"Because now we are on winter break and I have nothing to focus on. I'm just worried about how I'm going to keep all this pain and anger at bay. I just want it to go away."

"Don't worry. I'll keep you busy."

"You're the best, Kaoru."

"Anything for you, Haruhi, all you have to do is ask," he said leading her to the car so he could give her a ride home.

The mansion was a flurry of activity when he arrived. He frowned wondering what was going on. Then he remembered. His mother was leaving today for Italy and she was taking Hikaru with her. The twins would never tolerate a separation before, but Kaoru could feel only relief at the thought of Hikaru leaving with their mom. They never experienced this kind of tension between them, and neither of them knew what to do to resolve it.

"We're leaving, Kaoru," his mother said placing an air kiss on his forehead. "Don't forget, I'm counting on you. Take good care of Haruhi." With that she whisked out of the room before he could say a word.

Hikaru was miserable as they headed toward their private jet. He knew his mother was mad at him. He also knew she was going to work him like some commoner servant. So much for a break. Thoughts of Haruhi passed through his head. He may not be happy about being dragged to Italy, but maybe it was a good thing.

Haruhi had not spoken to him since she said it was over between them but absence made the heart grow fonder didn't it? Maybe they'd start talking again, start hanging out again, perhaps even start dating again after they had some time apart. She needed time to cool down, to lose some of her boiling anger. _She will never forgive you for this,_ Kaorus words echoed in his head and made his chest tighten. Well, he could hope anyway.

Kaoru stepped out of the shower wondering how he could help Haruhi. He thought about the past week. She looked slightly depressed when he arrived at her apartment each night. He tried to drag her out so they could go have some fun, but she always refused claiming she was too tired. So he stayed in her apartment with her and watched her cook, eat like a bird, and smile like a ghost. If he remained passive about this she wouldn't leave the apartment the whole break except to get necessary items like groceries.

"The hell with this," he muttered and reached for his cell phone.

"Hello."

"Hey, Haruhi, I have an idea. Tomorrow we are going to our mountain retreat for a few days."

'Um, Kaoru, I don't know if I'm really feeling up to it."

"Aw, but Haruhi, you promised me a sleep over. You're not breaking your promise are you?"

"No, but we don't have to go to the mountains. We can have the sleep over at my place. I'm physically exhausted from all the loss of sleep and emotionally drained from the past couple of weeks. I was planning on resting up at home before we have to dive into next semester."

"That's your great plan, Haruhi. I can picture it now, you will spend each day on the couch in some bargain sale shorts and your hideous glasses and you won't bother to take a brush to your hair let alone a flat iron. No offence, Haruhi but it doesn't make for a very lovely image."

She sighed heavily. "Kaoru, I don't really care what kind of image it makes. I just want to rest."

"You can rest in the mountains. Now picture this, a beautiful cabin, days filled with snowboarding, soaks in the hot tub, relaxing visits to the spa, wonderful dinners, and at night resting by the fire with some hot chocolate. My idea is much better than yours."

"Kaoru, I don't want to go," she said softly.

"You promised me a sleep over and I'm not going to let you back out of it. Besides, I don't want to see you moping around any longer. Come on, Haruhi, it's just for a few days. I promise you can get back to bargain basement and hideous as soon as we get home."

"Pffffttt." The sound came out of her as she laughed at his words knowing there was no sarcasm in Kaoru's comment, no insult intended. It was just his sense of humor. She sighed in defeat. "Fine, let me go so I can start packing."

"Don't bother. I'm packing your bag as we speak."

"Kaoru," she said half in warning half in fear. Kaoru loved to dress her up. He also loved to show a lot more of her than she ever showed.

"Don't argue with me and don't get mad at me for saying this, I mean I love you and all but since you don't care what you put on you have zero taste in clothes."

"Fine, just don't get too crazy," she warned shuddering as some past outfits crossed her mind.

"No promises." She could hear the smirk his voice. "Get some sleep. I'll pick you up at 9:00am."

"Good night, Kaoru."

"Good night, Haruhi."

Haruhi groaned as she heard the pounding on her door. Ugh, she only got to sleep a few hours ago. One of the things she hated about this pain was the loss of sleep. She never had trouble sleeping but now her mind was filled with things she wished she had never seen. Her chest tightened. That heaviness returned. She missed Hikaru even as she wanted to choke him for what he had done to her. Could she ever truly forgive him? Could she ever trust him again? She feared the answers for if she couldn't than how could they remain friends?

The pounding on her door only grew louder. With another groan she rolled out of bed and let Kaoru in.

"I asked you to be ready at 9," he said looking at her appearance." Geez, Haruhi, you look terrible."

"Thanks, Kaoru, that's what every girl wants to hear."

"That's not what I meant. I'm just worried that you're not sleeping."

"Yeah, well, I'm worried about it too."

"Get ready quickly. I think this mini vacation might be just what you need to get out of your funk and get back on track. Don't bother to change. We can do that when we get there."

"Okay, I'll just be a few minutes." Haruhi entered her bathroom, washed her face, brushed her teeth and popped in her contacts. She grabbed a small bag of toiletries she had thrown together last night and checked her apartment for anything she might have forgot to clean up or turn off. She turned out the lights, turned the key and followed kaoru to the waiting limo.

She began to fall asleep as soon as the car started moving. Her neck snapped back jolting her awake.

He chuckled. "Lay down and get some sleep. We have a few hours until we're there."

Without argument she laid down, facing him with her head in his lap. In moments she was out like a light.

He ran his hands through her hair his fingers getting caught on a knot. He shook his head. This girl could be recognized as a top model if she put in the smallest effort. Instead she didn't even bother to run a brush through her hair. He chuckled again. It would never dawn on her that she could use her looks to get anything she wanted. She would never use her looks to manipulate any man. She was who she was, take it or leave it. It was just one of the many things he loved about her.

As she feel deeper into sleep her mouth opened slightly. He gasped as her warm breath beat against his zipper. His face flushed as he looked down. Her face was so close to his…"Ugh," Kaoru groaned trying to fight the feelings he has always had for this girl. This amazing girl that changed his life forever. How could he and Hikaru ever begin to repay her for seeing them as individuals? He tried to cool his thoughts as her breath continued to assault him below the belt in a steady rhythm. Maybe taking her to the cabin wasn't a good idea.

After several more minutes of blissful torture, she rolled over. Her face a little closer to his knees. The fog of desire cleared from his mind and with that clarity he knew he had made the right decision. She needed this trip. She needed to get away and relax. He would just have to find away to control his feelings.

"Haruhi, Haruhi, we're here," Kaoru whispered.

Haruhi stretched and began following him inside the familiar Hitachiin retreat. She had been here many times through the years. So when Kaoru told her to go take a shower she walked straight to the room she had always stayed in while they were here.

When Haruhi stepped out of the bathroom she noticed an outfit layed out on the bed right down to the underwear. A small laugh escaped her. It never ceased to amaze her that for two men who never let anyone into their personal world, their personal space, they were perfectly fine with having no spatial boundaries where she was concerned. Seriously, she could have picked her own underwear.

She sighed and began to get dressed. There was no sense in arguing it. Kaoru was a force to be reckoned with when it came to fashion. He walked in just as she had finished zipping up her jeans.

"There's this thing commoners are quite fond of, it's called knocking. You curl your hand into a fist and tap your knuckles against a closed door. Then instead of just walking in without permission you actually wait until you are told to enter," she said sarcastically.

"Really? Never heard of it," Kaoru said with a smile on his face. "What a strange thing to be fond of."

She laughed softly herself before frowning. "Seriously, though. You shouldn't just walk in here. I might have been in the middle of getting dressed."

"So, what's the big deal?"

She sighed in exasperation for Kaoru truly didn't understand her issue with it.

"The big deal is I'm a girl and you're a guy and a guy shouldn't just walk in on a girl when she is getting dressed or undressed. Geez, Kaoru, you were a host for crying out loud. You know how to be a gentleman."

"But being a host was just pretend. We pasted on our smiles, we played our part, and all the girls left happy. This is real life and we're not just any guy and girl. We're best friends. I've seen you barely dressed plenty of times."

"Yes and since I yelled at you every single time it happened one would think you would get the hint by now."

"Oh, I get your hint. I just don't agree with it," he said humor lighting up his eyes. "It really shouldn't be a big deal. You don't have a single thing to be ashamed of."

The tone of his voice and the look in his eyes as he said that caused her breath to hitch. That look had returned. That look she had only seen once before on Kaoru. It was almost….heated. He spoke before she could ponder if that was the right word or not.

"First order of business. We hit the spa."

"Um, couldn't we have something to eat first? I haven't eaten all day," she said feeling her stomach begin to grumble.

"We will be served at the spa. I'm hungry too. Here," he said as he held out her coat for her. "See, I can be a gentleman."

His words whispered in her ear causing her to shiver.

"I know," she whispered in return.

He held his hand out to her and she took it without reservation. Kaoru didn't read too much into it or take it as a sign that she felt anything for him. He touched her so often for so long that she never questioned any form of contact from him.

The spa was beautiful and before she knew it she was waxed, massaged, been given a haircut to clear the dead ends, and a facial. Delicious little appetizers were fed to her along the way. Normally she would scoff at such pampering and state being a guy was much easier, but all the tension she had been carrying around was completely rinsed away along with all the fancy shampoos and body washes. So she kept her usual blunt complaints to herself.

She slipped on the kimono that was laid out for her and followed the worker to a nearby room. Inside Kaoru was already kneeling at a table filled with food. It wasn't common to see a guy their age wearing a kimono, but thanks to all the cosplay they had done in the host club she had seen Kaoru wear one more than once. Haruhi sat down across from Kaoru and began eating. Everything was delicious and definitely the best that money could buy. She glanced around nervously.

Kaoru frowned as he watched her turn her head inspecting every corner as if she were looking for someone.

"What are you doing, Haruhi?" he asked curiously.

"I-I'm just waiting for Kyoya-Senpai to appear behind me and tell me how much he added to my debt for all this fancy treatment," she said still scanning the room.

They looked at each other then burst out laughing.

"Don't worry this isn't costing you anything," he said trying to control his laughter at her accurate description of Kyoya.

"You know how I feel about any expensive gifts or gestures. It's bad enough you are going to feed me and probably pay for all kinds of activities for the next few days. I can't even begin to figure out how much this afternoon has cost," she said feeling guilty for accepting his invitation.

"Will you stop looking so guilty? This day hasn't cost me a cent. We Hitachiins are VIP here," he said with a proud smile. "Our mother designs all the Kimonos worn by both the guests and the staff."

She looked down at the lovely kimono she was wearing. It was cream colored and delicately designed with cherry blossoms. "I don't know anything about fashion but even I can tell your mother has an eye for making beautiful clothes."

"Yeah, she's a genius. Luckily I inherited her creative mind. I love to design clothes as much as she does."

"I know," Haruhi whispered. She could see the passion in Kaoru's eyes every time he spoke about fashion. His goal for the future was as clear as her own. She smiled happy that they both knew exactly what they wanted to do for the rest of their lives. At least career wise.

"Excuse me," a middle-aged woman said as she came threw the door bowing slightly at them. "Master Kaoru, Lady Haruhi, it is your scheduled time to used the hot springs. The changing rooms are just on the other side of those doors, and they lead to the springs. Enjoy."

"Thank you," Kaoru said smiling at her with his former host smile.

"Lady Haruhi?" she questioned knowing full well that that title didn't belong on a commoner. Even the elite women were not usually called Lady until after marriage.

Kaoru merely shrugged. "I told you, VIP. Let's go enjoy the springs."

She followed him through the door and branched off from him to enter the women's locker room. A soak in the hot spring might actually get rid of the last bit of tension buried deep inside her.

Once undressed she wrapped herself in the small white towel and entered the hot spring. She looked down at herself feeling quite conscious. The towel barely covered what it needed to cover. She took a deep breath grateful that they had a scheduled time to use the springs. Being alone would be much more comfortable than sitting here dressed like this in front of other people even if they were other women. A familiar gasp made her freeze.

"Ka-Kaoru, what are you doing here?" she asked tugging on the bottom of her towel willing it to miraculously lengthen.

"This is our time in the springs."

"But, but….did I make a mistake and enter the men's side?"

"No, this is the spring attached to the room we were dining in," he said willing his voice to sound casual. He eyed her up and down and knew he was in trouble. He moved his hands down to his upper lap. He did it slowly as to not draw any attention to his movement. Haruhi already looked terrified to be in here with him. The last thing he needed was for his towel to rise up out of the water or worse yet have a part of him pop out from under it unexpectedly. "Come on in and take a seat. It's just me."

He watched her hesitate for just a moment as she stared down at her adorable little toes. He took this time to look her over once more. A slight swell of creamy skin peeked out of the top edge of her towel. The bottom edge just covered the parts of a woman they didn't want to expose in front of men they weren't dating or married to. It took all of his self control not to step up to her and remove the fabric that was hiding all of her from him. He bit his bottom lip trying to forget that she had nothing else on.

Just when he wondered if she'd leave she tentatively walked toward him. Each step drew his attention to her legs that looked silky smooth. He knew from previous touches over the years that Haruhi hated dry itchy skin so her skin was always smooth, but after a waxing and a spa treatment she practically glowed. Good grief, maybe he should be the one to leave.

As she slowly descended the steps into the spring he watched as the bottom of the towel lifted slightly when it hit the water. She grabbed the bottom with both hands and held it down as she finished getting in and sat down beside him.

"No need to look all weird, Haruhi, I promise I won't bite," he said trying to ease the tension, but his eyes chose that moment to fall upon her bare shoulder and he wondered if he could keep that promise.

"Sorry, Kaoru, I don't know why I'm acting this way. I guess it just takes some getting used to. I mean I've never sat in just a towel in a hot spring with a guy before. You can go ahead, you can laugh at me."

"I'm not going to laugh. I've never sat in a spring in just a towel with a girl before either, but I'm comfortable with you no matter what I do."

His words made her smile and that distracted him just enough to get his raging body under control.

Kaoru's words made her happy. She had always been comfortable with him before as well. Why had she hesitated? Why had it felt so awkward to be in a towel around him? He was her best friend. It shouldn't make her blush to see his bare chest. She had never had a physical reaction to seeing his body. So why did it feel like something was stirring within her now? I mean they sat side by side a million times. If anything she has sat closer than this, wrapped in his arms, or placed in his lap. But she was never so close to him while they had nothing on but a towel. She groaned. Why did she have to think about that?

"It feels good doesn't it?" he whispered misinterpreting her groan. She was grateful. Why did his words sound so suggestive and why was she suddenly over analyzing everything he said?

"Yes, it does," she answered. She leaned her head back hoping to block out all the strange thoughts she was suddenly having about her buddy. She was here to relax not renew the tension she had finally been able to shed. "Hikaru," she said realizing she hadn't thought about him or the pain he caused her all day.

"What about him?" Kaoru asked. Her sudden outburst startled him.

"Nothing, I….it's nothing." She knew Kaoru wanted her to talk to him, but she just didn't want to talk about Hikaru right now. She didn't even want to think about him. She felt better than she had since the whole ordeal started and she didn't want to ruin it with her busy mind.

When their time was up they returned to the room they had been using, got dressed, and ended their fabulous day at the spa. They returned to the Hitachiin retreat, ate some fruit, and watched a movie. By the time it was ending she falling asleep. She was so relaxed and for the first time in weeks she felt like she might be able to fall asleep and stay that way. She knew who was responsible.

"Hey," he said nudging her with the arm that was leaning against her.

"What?"

"You're tired. Go to sleep. I'll clean up here then turn in myself."

"Okay," she said while stretching. She stopped and looked down at her best friend. "Hey, Kaoru?"

"Yeah," he whispered as he looked up at her.

"I said Hikaru's name before because I was surprised that I hadn't thought about him or the pain all day. It's because of you that I was able to get a break from it all so, thank you, Kaoru," she said before bending down and giving his cheek a gentle kiss.

Once in her room she reached in the bag that Kaoru had said contained nightwear. The second she did her hand slid against silk. She frowned. Where were the comfortable shorts and T-shirts? She dug a little deeper. When she encountered nothing but silk she pulled out the top set not bothering to look through the rest. She changed into the pink silk nightie with spaghetti straps and a pair of matching panties. After brushing her teeth she climbed under the covers for warmth wondering why Kaoru would think this was appropriate sleep wear for a night in a cabin in the mountains.

"I'll kill him tomorrow," she muttered as she slipped into sleep.

Kaoru was still on the couch holding his cheek. What was wrong with him? Haruhi had kissed his cheek countless times in the past so why was he feeling like tonight were any different? Perhaps it was the slight blush he remembered on her cheeks in the hot spring? Or perhaps it was the vision of her silky legs that still danced in his head? Or maybe it was the fact that he was in love with her that made it mean so much to him. He sighed. He was a fool. That kiss meant nothing to her so why was he making such a big deal about it?

He got up, brought their cups and popcorn bowl to the sink and retreated to his room to change. He put on black silk sleep pants and a T-shirt. He brushed his teeth and headed toward Haruhi's room. He watched her sleep peacefully for a few minutes while he replayed her earlier words in his mind. He was glad he thought of this, he was glad she got a break from the pain his brother had caused, and he was glad he was the one who made her feel better. He listened to her breathing deeply before he crawled into her bed and slipped his arms around her.

Haruhi was still half asleep when she felt arms slide around her waist. She knew whose arms went around her regardless of the fact that she was more asleep than awake. Those identical men were anything but identical to her. They were so different to her she didn't understand how people had such difficulty telling them apart. Even their touch was not the same.

"Kaoru," she whispered her voice still heavy with sleep.

He smiled as he tightened his hold on her. "Even asleep you know it's me."

"I couldn't mix the two of you up if someone paid me to do it." She rolled over. "What are you doing in here?"

"What a stupid question," he said followed by a yawn. "We're here for our sleepover aren't we?"

"A sleep over typically means everyone sleeps in the same room, not the same bed."

"Since when have I ever followed the rules? I make up my own rules, Haruhi, you know that."

She laughed softly. "True, but we should camp out on the floor if you truly want to have a sleep over."

"This is a sleep over Hitachiin style. We're not leaving this bed. I'm too comfortable."

"Whatever," she said feeling sleep tugging her back under. "Good night, Kaoru."

"Good night, Haruhi," his hands slipping lower as his arms relaxed. The moment they did his eyes shot open. He hadn't really paid attention to what she was wearing even though he was the one who packed the bag full of short nighties. The silk must have twisted when she rolled over to face him because it was raised high up on her body and his hand was grazing her bare hipbone. He dared look down. She was wearing the pink one. He inwardly groaned. That one had a particularly tiny pair of panties. No wonder he was grazing her hip. He moved his fingers a half an inch and was met with the thin strip of material that rested just below her hipbone.

He knew he planned on using the sleep over idea to sleep in her bed beside her, so what possessed him to pack that kind of sleepwear? Where were her baggy bargain priced shorts when he needed them? He took a deep breath trying to cool his thoughts and get his body under control. He must have wanted to torture himself. His body was growing hot, tight; he had to get a grip on his feelings. He willed himself to think about unappealing things like math, lectures, homework, and plain food. _Oh good it's working _he thought as he felt his body relax a bit. Once he cleared his mind he felt his eyes lower as the soothing day caught up to him and lulled him into sleep.

Haruhi woke up in the middle of the night flush up against a warm body. Her face was up against his warm chest, his arms were draped casually over her hips, and her legs were entwined with his.

"Kaoru," she whispered knowing his familiar hold without even looking at his face.

"Mmmm, Haruhi," he whispered back his hold tightening ever so slightly.

She looked up thinking he was mumbling in his sleep. What she found were his beautiful amber eyes staring back at her.

Kaoru stared into her big brown eyes before letting allowing him the pleasure of gazing at the rest of her face. He stopped at her lips unable to look away as he wondered what they fully tasted like. Unable to take it anymore he leaned down toward her but she pulled back.

"Kaoru, what-what are you doing?" She asked her eyes filled with fear and something else? Curiosity? He wasn't sure. He was too nervous by her reaction to think clearly.

"I want to kiss you," he boldly whispered burying his nerves. "Haruhi, I've always wanted to kiss you."

She held her head away from his as Hikaru went through her mind. Then she remembered painfully that he had kissed someone else while they were still dating. If he could do that than she could kiss Kaoru with out any guilt. Couldn't she? She decided not to think about it anymore as she leaned toward him.

She heard him gasp as she moved closer. The moment his lips touched hers she couldn't help but compare them to Hikaru's. She tried to fight the unbidden thoughts. The last thing she ever wanted to do was compare the brothers but she couldn't stop herself. The thoughts were there wanted or not. Hikaru kisses were rough and possessive. They were fiery intensity as frightening as they were intriguing.

But, Kaoru's kiss….Kaoru's lips were gentle and soft. A tender passion meant solely to please not to frighten. She had never been kissed like this before her first kiss was not even this gentle. She gasped at the simple beauty of his kiss. Kaoru took advantage of that tiny opening and swept his tongue inside her mouth.

When Hikaru kissed her she was frightened by the explosive heat since all too quickly it turned possessive and rough and scared her too much to want to go any further. Kaoru's kiss was so tender. He was not a raging inferno. He was a gentle flame that licked at her senses and warmed her more and more with each passing second. For the first time in her life she wasn't afraid to keep going. She wanted more, burned for more. And also for the first time she took the initiative in an intimate moment. She gripped his hair pulling him closer deepening their kiss. She heard him moan as his fingers whispered across the skin of her arm. His touch was barely there yet she could think of nothing else. Kaoru, he was a candle, an eternal flame that burned on and on. She pressed herself against him. Arching herself into his body.

A long moan escaped Kaoru's mouth as she pressed her soft tiny body against his hard sharp plains. In the back of his mind he knew he had to stop soon or he wouldn't be able to. Then he wondered _why do I have to stop?_ She wasn't dating his brother anymore. Hikaru had his chance and he blew it in a reckless painful way. She didn't belong to anyone, so why couldn't she belong to him? He lowered his hand and slipped it under her short nightgown. His fingers ran along her lower back then up her side. She was so tiny, so soft, and so warm.

She tensed as she felt his hand rising higher and higher.

"Kaoru," she said a little hesitantly.

"Haruhi," he whispered nuzzling a spot alongside her ear. "I wanted Hikaru to be happy, I really did. I wanted you to be happy too, but you weren't and now I just…I just…. I just want you. I've _always_ wanted you. Please, Haruhi, please give me the chance to show you how much I love you."

She pulled gently on his hair and turned him to face her. She looked at this man who had an identical face to the man she had so recently broke up with yet in a hundred ways he was so very different. There was no angst, no jealousy, and no enraged possessiveness. Looking at Kaoru she could see only-_love._

"Please, let me love you," he barely whispered.

"Kaoru…" she couldn't find her voice to answer him further so she let her actions replace her words.

She tugged his T-shirt off and ran her hand down his chest, down his abs, until the tips of her fingers brushed the top of his silk pajama bottoms.

Taking this as a yes he ran his hand along her hip making sure to catch the edge of her night gown. He moved his hand higher continuing to slide the silky material up along with it until he lifted her gently and removed it from her completely.

He let out a long shuddering breath as he gazed at her tiny features. He flung the blankets off of them as he kneeled beside her. He never thought he would have this opportunity with her and he was not about to waste a minute of it. His eyes slowly caressed her form stopping to memorize every rise, every curve. His eyes fell on the tiny scrap of material that hugged her hips and barely covered what was in between. He placed one hand on her flat stomach and was shaken by how large his hand was upon her. After drinking his fill he leaned down to kiss her.

Haruhi felt the heat rising as Kaoru placed his lips on her mouth and his hand on her thigh. His lips moved down and his hand moved up until both were kissing and touching in a way that she had never been kissed or touched before. She ran her hands along his body as something inside of her kept building and building until blazing hot white flashed before her eyes as her body convulsed and she screamed his name.

Kaoru placed himself between her legs poised to take the final plunge within her. She gasped as he gently entered her but was stopped by a firm barrier. Was it possible?

"Haruhi, you're still a…"

She placed her fingers on his lips halting his words. She was afraid he would stop. She was afraid he wouldn't. He must have seen the debate in her eyes for he stared at her with a questioning look. He bit down on his lip and she could tell he was struggling to hold back. Her body was still filled with an unquenchable heat. His flushed skin told her he felt the same. For the life of her she couldn't come up with a good enough reason to deny them what they both wanted. So, she slid her hands up his chest until she was cradling his handsome face in her hands.

"Just handle me with care once you break through, okay, Kaoru," she whispered.

"You know I will," he whispered thanking every higher power he knew that she wanted to continue. "I won't move until you let me know I can."

She slid her hands back down and gripped his shoulders as he pushed his way through the barrier that had stopped him. With that one movement they both lost their virginity. _It feels amazing._ He was pulled from his thoughts as he heard her cry out in pain. He quickly looked at her face to find tears racing their way down her cheeks. She grit her teeth as she tried to bite back the small whimpers of pain he could hear from her.

"Shhh,shhh, Haruhi," he said as he braced himself on his elbows so he could wipe away her tears. "Shhhhh, it's okay, it's going to be okay."

It took everything he had to remain still and not plunge ahead and enjoy her, but he wasn't simply slaking a need. He loved her. She endured this pain for him so he would endure this torture for her.

"Haruhi, I'm sorry I had to hurt you," he said wiping the last remaining tears. "I promise I'll be as gentle as I can."

"I know you will," she said as she pulled his head down for another kiss. Hoping to distract her from the pain he put every ounce of love into it. He must have done something right because she deepened the kiss and moaned into his mouth. Finally she shifted her hips and pulled his head away.

"Move with me, Kaoru," she whispered and he didn't have to be asked twice.

He began moving as slowly as he could. The second he moved he felt his heart stop, then it flipped over and all the love he felt for her started overflowing. It spilled out and fluttered down into his stomach as if butterflies resided there. He had never known such love not even for his own twin. It was a shocking revelation yet it was the truth. It was breathtaking.

He built up the tiniest bit of speed every now and then but the pace was still slowly killing him. His body screamed for him to forge ahead and find release, but he had promised to be gentle. He murmured a prayer of thanks when he heard Haruhi whisper, "faster" and so he obliged. He quickened the pace only when she did. It was incredible, it was heaven, and before he knew it she was meeting his every move and he was able to increase his speed until he was crying out her name.

He collapsed on top of her. It wasn't until after he pulled himself back together that he feared he could have crushed her.

"Haruhi," he said as he rolled onto his side to face her. He was horrified to find a fresh set of tears coursing down her face. "Why are you crying? Please don't tell me you regret this already."

He braced himself for her answer. He couldn't bare the thought of her regretting what had been the best feeling of his life but he knew she'd tell him the truth and that's what frightened him.

"No, no, Kaoru," she was quick to assure him. "I have no regrets."

"Then why are you crying? Oh, God, did I hurt you that badly?" He looked alarmed.

She reached out and placed a hand on his face.

"No, once the pain eased it stayed away."

"Then why are you crying?" he asked again.

"Because you were as gentle as you promised. It was my first time and I felt no fear only this burning need to continue. It was so beautiful, Kaoru. That was exactly how every girls first time should be. You were amazing," she whispered as she gave him a quick kiss on the lips.

"You were amazing too. Every guys first time should be that way as well."

She looked at him, a question in her eyes.

"Yes, Hariri, it was my first time too, and I can't imagine it being any better. You were perfect."

Hariri didn't know why she was surprised at his admission. She knew he never had a girlfriend, but he did amass quite a fan base back in the host club days and she knew girls looked at him all the time not that he paid them any attention, but they were there for the taking if he wanted them. She never gave any thought to the sex lives of her male friends. She was pleased to find she had been his first as well. It just made the whole thing even sweeter.

Hariri snuggled in to him as he held her tight. He felt her breathing slow and knew she had fallen back to sleep. He should sleep as well. Now that he gave her a day of relaxation he had planned a more active day to follow. He should sleep, but his mind was too filled. He thought about every single moment he just shared with her. His body shuddered as he remembered every touch, every kiss, every _feeling._ The entire experience was intense and simply amazing. He thought about her tears of joy, her confession to how beautiful it was. He was so happy that he could give her that after what she had given to him.

He froze at that thought. She had given herself to him. Not to Hikaru, which had surprised him when he realized she was still a virgin, but that mystery was cleared up when she told him she had no fears this night. Hikaru was a volatile person. The bottom line was she had been scared. He was savoring every detail of their night together when it dawned on him; did this encounter mean to her what it meant to him? Were they together now or was she just seeking comfort in the arms of a friend? He tightened his hold hoping she was not just seeking temporary comfort. She gave something to him she had never given to another man and now that she had it could never belong to anyone but him. He was her first but the question floating through his mind was what he could do to ensure he'd be her last? Did she love him the way he loved her? And what would he do if she didn't?

A/N (again): Well, there you have it. Too much? Not enough? How does everyone feel about how things are going? Please let me know what you think about this chapter, how the characters were portrayed, and how you feel about what happened between them. I genuinely love to hear from you. It gets me back to the laptop as soon as I have free time. Look forward to your input. Arigato!


	10. Falling for you

**Disclaimer: I don't own blah blah blah, all rights belong to Bisco Hatori. She is the genius behind these awesome characters. I just like to see them fall in love with different people. Heehee ;)**

A/N: You guys are truly the best. Thank you so much for the awesome reviews. It really does inspire me to continue writing. I love to hear that people can't wait for the next chapter. I really do appreciate it. Thank you for taking the time to let me know how you feel. Keep the reviews coming. Okay, here's chapter 10 hope you enjoy!

Hikaru leaned against the wall looking at the line of models getting ready to rehearse for the runway show. He recognized the one he had kissed and was glad to see she had decided to work for his mom once more even if he didn't really want to see her. Looking at her now he still wondered why he had returned her kiss. It had been soft and gentle just as Haruhi had seen. Why did he kiss her like that and why was it so impossible for him to kiss Haruhi that way?

_Haruhi,_ just thinking about her hurt. He missed her so much. He missed holding her, talking to her, laughing with her, seeing her beautiful smile, and her warm brown eyes. His chest felt tight. He truly hated being with out her and doing so without being with Kaoru only made the feeling twice as bad. He missed them both, but where Kaoru was his brother and couldn't truly leave him, Haruhi could. How could he continue without her? What would he do if she wanted nothing more to do with him? He couldn't bear that thought. He took a deep breath and got back to work. At least he was too busy to dwell on it for long. It hurt too much. He wondered what Haruhi was doing? Did she miss him at all?

Haruhi woke up with Kaoru's arm draped loosely around her waist. Thank goodness he wasn't wrapped around her like he usually was since she needed to get up, use the bathroom, and take a shower. She slid out from under him as carefully as she could and made her way to the bathroom.

The warm water felt great as it washed over her. She bent down to grab the shampoo bottle and felt her insides ache. She gasped out loud as the shower woke her up and she thought abut the reasons why she was achy.

"Oh. My. God. I slept with Kaoru," she said as she stared at the shower wall. "I really slept with Kaoru."

She began to shake slightly as she thought about everything that had happened in the middle of the night. It had started out as a simple request for a kiss. That had seemed harmless enough but his kiss was so gentle, so tender. Before she knew it she was burning for more and when Kaoru had asked for more she eagerly complied. Why had she given herself to him so easily? Why had she given herself to him after only one kiss? She had been kissing Hikaru for months and never felt such burning. "Oh, no, Hikaru," she whispered. If he found out he was going to kill the both of them.

That familiar pain, that terrible hurt returned as she remembered he cheated on her. She had nothing to feel guilty about. She had not betrayed him the way he betrayed her, but he wasn't going to see it that way. Of all the men she could have given herself to he would have preferred it to be any one other than his own twin. She knew that much.

She groaned as she leaned against the tile wall. Guilt and regret began to nibble at her conscious but it wasn't as bad as she thought it would be. Did she regret her night with Kaoru? Not really, she was surprised to discover. Who could regret what the two of them had shared. Kaoru had been so gentle, his touch so soft. Her body tingled as she remembered every sensation he had brought to her. Her heartbeat began to accelerate. _What was that?_ She had never had those kinds of feelings for Kaoru before.

Sure, she loved him, and he was her best friend. She could tell him anything, she trusted him even more than she trusted Hikaru since he could never keep his big mouth shut when he knew something that would annoy the other hosts. She had a deeper bond with Kaoru than she had with his older brother as well, but _love?_ She had never allowed herself to think that way about Kaoru and she had no idea he felt that way about her but she had seen it clearly in his eyes last night. The question was what were they going to do about it if anything?

She knew he didn't want to hurt Hikaru any more than she did, and this was going to hurt him in a massive way. She took a deep breath and continued with her shower hissing in pain as she moved certain ways. What was she getting so worked up for? This was Kaoru, they shared something wonderful and that was it, right? This would just stay between them no harm, no foul. Deciding that she was able to let go of the tension she felt somewhat normal by the time she went to the kitchen to fix breakfast.

Kaoru woke up and reached beside him for Haruhi. What he found was an empty space and cold sheets. He could smell the coffee and food invade his senses and he smiled. He stretched feeling more satisfied than he ever had in his life. He slept with Haruhi. He felt his morning friend twitch at that thought. She had been so soft, so warm. Being with her was so much more than he ever realized it would be. He considered himself a very creative person since he could design almost any article of clothing in no time flat, but even he had to admit his imagination fell way short on what being with Haruhi would truly be like. It had been heaven on earth.

He got out of bed and followed the tantalizing scent into the kitchen. And there she was moving around the counter like an expert. As someone who was raised with servants and cooks his whole life he never experienced simple home cooked meals made just for him until he had met Haruhi. She was so much more than a friend to him. She was home to him. Home to all of the former hosts really since none of them had a meal prepared by their mothers. Watching her move around the kitchen had a very domestic feel to it. It was almost as if they were married. His heart stopped beating at that thought. He never dreamed he would get as close to Haruhi as he was last night, so he never allowed himself to think about marriage, but Haruhi would make the perfect wife. He could not imagine a better woman for the role. He smiled and approached her as quietly as he could.

"Good Morning," he whispered as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck. He frowned as he felt her stiffen completely in his arms. He waited for her to relax as she realized it was him but she didn't.

"Good Morning," she said stiffly as she pulled from his embrace and continued to make breakfast.

"Haruhi," he said feeling his heart deflate in his chest.

"Yes," she said keeping her sole focus on the food in front of her.

"Haruhi, look at me," he whispered.

When she did he almost wished she hadn't. She looked at him warily and with a little…uncertainty?

"You _do_ regret it," he said taking a seat at the table as she served the dishes she had made. He couldn't hide the disappointment in his voice.

She didn't say a word as she poured them coffee and took the seat across from him. He stared at her as she dished food onto each one of their plates.

"Haruhi?" he questioned as she began eating with out answering him.

"No, I told you last night I don't regret it and I still don't," she said her statement somehow hanging in the air unfinished.

"But," he prompted.

"But it wasn't our smartest move, Kaoru. We can never tell Hikaru what happened last night and you know how I feel about secrets."

"I wasn't planning on coming right out and telling him but I'm sure he'll figure it out on his own once he sees us together. I don't like secrets either so why do you care so much if he knows?"

"Because I don't have a death wish and I'd like to think you don't have one either," she said looking horrified by the thought of Hikaru finding out.

"I don't have a death wish, but I have nothing to feel bad about so I don't. I didn't go behind his back and take you from him. He gave you up. He let you go when he decided to kiss some other girl."

"He's not going to see it that way, Kaoru, and you know it. He is going to be hurt," she whispered.

"I know, but he has no one to blame but himself. I don't see why we can't give it a go now that the two of you are broken up."

She looked at him in shock. "Is that what you want?"

"Yes. Why do you look surprised? I told you how I felt about you last night."

"I know but surely you don't want to just start going out with me right after I broke up with your brother. I don't want to be one of those girls the two of you loathed in high school."

"What are you talking about? You're not anything like any of the girls we went to school with," he said looking total confused.

"But the two of you always hated the fact that the girls didn't care which one of you they went out with as long as it was one of you and now you want me to go out with you since I don't have Hikaru?"

"Is that what you're worried about?"

"That's what everyone will think if I started going out with you," she said flatly as she pushed her food around her plate.

"Are you worried I think that?" he asked frowning at her.

"The thought crossed my mind."

"Well you can let that thought go. I don't think that at all and I never cared about what anyone thought except for you and Hikaru. No one else matters. You are not trading one twin for the other without thought. You are nothing like those other girls. They couldn't tell us apart if their lives depended on it so they weren't going out with us for who we are they wanted to go out with us because we were a Hitachiin. You would never have slept with me if there weren't things about me that you love. Things that are different from the reasons you love Hikaru. I know that, Hikaru knows that. You could have slept with Hikaru if you wanted too but you didn't. Maybe there are things about me you love even more than you love about him since you gave yourself to me, I don't know. What I do know is that you did not sleep with me as a trade off for Hikaru."

He looked pissed and she didn't know what to say to make him feel better.

"I know I would never go out with one of you just because I couldn't have the other but it is going to look like it and I worried you might think it."

"Well, I don't and I already told you I don't care what anyone else thinks. The only thing that matters to me is how we feel about each other. I love you, Haruhi, I really do. Do you love me?" he whispered his question as though fearing her answer.

"I do love you, Kaoru, and I don't regret last night, I'm just not sure I'm ready to jump into a relationship so soon after breaking up with Hikaru. I can't just pretend my relationship with him meant nothing, and I can't pretend I'm not still hurt by what he did."

"I understand," he said trying to be patient. "But I did bring you here to try to help you with that pain, and I do want you to have fun with me. Can I ask you a favor?"

"You can ask me anything," she said without hesitation.

"Will you at least consider going out with me when you are ready for a relationship. I know you never gave much thought to feeling that way about me but could you try to explore your feelings for me and see if you could view me as more than a friend to you?"

"Okay, I will."

"Promise?"

"I promise," she said and smiled at him.

"All right, then eat up cause you are going to be burning some serious calories today. I made an appointment for you with a snowboard instructor and we need to be out there in less than two hours. After we eat I'm going to shower we are both going to change and hit the snow."

"Kaoru, I'm not very good at snowboarding. You know that."

"You're better at it than you were at skiing. That's why I asked for an instructor. I mean I could probably teach you how to ski, but I think it's best if an expert taught you more about snowboarding. Come on, it will be fun."

"You know I'm going to kill you if I go home in any kind of cast right?"

He started to laugh. "I know, that's why you have an instructor"

After washing the dishes Haruhi made her way up to her room wondering what she should wear that would keep her warm enough out on the slopes all day. She sighed as she seen a full outfit laid out on the bed right down to the boots. It looked like a professional snowboarding outfit. She shook her head. The money these two spent on clothes for her was something she didn't even want to add up in her head. If she factored in what their mother spent designing for her it would be double if not triple what she had originally owed the host club. She sighed and began getting dressed. She shook her head as she stared at the ridiculous scrap of lace Kaoru must consider underwear.

As soon as Kaoru was done getting dressed he went and looked for Haruhi. When he found her he forgot how to breath. The snowboard pants he had designed for her hung low on her tiny hips. She looked hot in their latest style of snowboard gear. She looked like a professional extreme athlete. He smiled gently as he looked at her. It was too bad she had zero athletic ability cause if she did have any talent for it she'd be the sport hottie. A surge of heat raced through him, but he swallowed it down as she turned toward him.

"Ready to go?" he asked wishing his voice had sounded a little steadier.

"Sure," she said.

Once on the slopes Kaoru went off to see about her instructor. She looked at all the other people out on this day enjoying the resort.

"Well, hello there pretty lady," a man said as he stopped in front of her. A very good looking man she had noticed when he came into full view.

"Hello," she said flatly not too taken by his looks since handsome men had surrounded her since she had started high school.

"You look amazing in your gear," he said then flushed after saying it. "I know that must sound like some cheesy pick up line but I work here and see the latest fashions all the time. I'm serious when I say you look great."

"Thanks," she said just as flatly as her greeting. She was unimpressed by pick up lines of any kind and never got all flustered by compliments. If anything they annoyed her. Who cared about how someone looked anyway? That told you nothing about them as a person.

"You know, I finish work about six and most of the young people hit the club around here. It's real trendy and has some great music. Would you be interested in going?"

Kaoru was told the instructor was a man named Hara Satoru and that he was waiting near the lodge entrance for them to arrive. Scanning for Haruhi Kaoru felt an uncharacteristic flash of jealousy jolt through him. Who was this good looking guy smiling like a lovesick fool. It was obvious he was trying to hit on her. As oblivious as Haruhi was she probably didn't even realize it. He was about to storm over to them when he stopped. Did he have the right to interfere if some other guy was putting the moves on her? She hadn't said she would go out with him so did he have a right to make a claim on her? Hell, yes he did, if only to check this guy out first and see what he was like.

He walked up to them and casually draped his arm around her waist. His hand rested gently on her hip. His heart began beating madly for two reasons, one would she shrug off his hand and embarrass him in front of this guy, and two he felt a shockwave of electricity fly threw him the moment his hand landed on her tiny hip. Visions of last night swam through his head but he tried to keep his mind clear.

"Hey, what's going on?" he asked proud that he kept any of the jealousy and anger he was feeling out of his voice. Yes, he felt those things, yes, he knew how Hikaru felt when other guys were near Haruhi, the difference was he could control himself his brother could not.

"Oh, hey, Kaoru, Ummm…" she stopped not sure she wanted to mention the invite to the club. Not that she wanted to keep it from him but she wasn't sure how she felt about going.

"I was just telling your girl here about this club the young crowd around here goes too. You two should come it's usually a real good time," he said disappointment clearly on his face as he eyed Kaoru's hand on her hip. Luckily she didn't shrug him off so he pulled her a little bit closer to him.

"What do you think? It could be fun," he said nuzzling into her face not bothering to correct the fact that she wasn't his girl. If Haruhi wasn't going to say anything he wasn't either.

"Whatever. I don't care either way so whatever you decide is fine," she said to avoid an argument.

Kaoru knew Haruhi would rather stick pins in her eyes than spend a night dancing in a club. He normally would avoid such a thing since she didn't like it, but he did bring her here to have a good time and it did sound like fun.

"Sounds fun," Kaoru said knowing Haruhi was probably cursing him out in her head right now.

"Great, we usually meet up there around eight. It's got some good people and some good music. You won't regret coming. I, umm…I hope I don't overstep my bounds, but your girl has some serious model potential you know," he said eyeing Kaoru nervously.

"What are you a modeling scout?"

"No, but I have just designed my own small line of sportswear. I'm telling you if your girl here wore my designs every man in Japan would take up snowboarding," he said sliding his gaze over her from head to toe.

"Until they actually saw me snowboarding then they would be running off the mountain, trust me," she said completely unembarrassed by her lack of athleticism.

The man laughed. "Trust me, it wouldn't matter. They wouldn't be looking at your skills."

Haruhi felt Kaoru stiffen beside her. She was a little insulted herself at his insinuation, but Kaoru opened his mouth before she could. Which was probably a good thing since she was so notoriously blunt.

"If my girl is going to model for anyone she is going to model for me," Kaoru said.

"For you?" the guy said trying to figure out if he was lying or not. "Are you starting your own line of clothing too?"

"Something like that," Kaoru said with his infamous smirk.

"So, are you just starting up, just thinking about it, or do you have something on the market?" the guy said a bit of a challenge in his voice.

"Some of my designs have been on the market."

"Oh? Under what name?" the guy asked. Haruhi had the distinct feeling he was trying to call Kaoru out on a lie. Boy, was he in for a rude awakening.

"Hitachiin. I'm Hitachiin Kaoru," Kaoru said putting his hand out for the man to shake.

"Hi-Hitachiin, as in the famous fashion designer, Hitachiin Yuzuha?" he said in awe.

"The one and the same. She's my mother. I've designed for her plenty of times. Most of the time she likes what she sees and puts it into one of her lines. I designed what Haruhi is wearing."

He looked her over once more seeing the small Hitachiin logo on the snowboarding pants she was wearing.

"Wait, Haruhi? Fujioka Haruhi?" he asked coming out of his awe over Kaoru's name.

Kaoru frowned as she did. How did this guy know her name?

"You're my next student. I'm Hara Satoru, your snowboard instructor," he said looking totally pleased with this revelation.

"Great," Kaoru said struggling to keep the sarcasm out of his voice.

"Well, let's get started. I'm embarrassed to say your time started five minutes ago. I apologize that I was busy talking."

"No problem," she said.

"Be careful," Kaoru said as he gave her a quick kiss. He wanted to really lay one on her in front of this guy, but he knew the limits Haruhi would endure. He wasn't sure she wouldn't push him off if he carried this too far. "We'll board together after your lesson."

"Okay," she said giving her one of her heart stopping smiles. He could feel Hara-San freeze at her smile too. Kaoru's smirk grew. Haruhi didn't give out that many genuine smiles. This one was all for him.

Kaoru tried to enjoy boarding, but he kept a close eye on Hara-San as he placed his hands on Haruhi's body to adjust her hips into the correct position. He narrowed his eyes not sure he believed she needed as much adjusting as this man was giving her or that he needed to linger there as long as he did, but he bit his lip and kept quiet about it. Haruhi would not be pleased if he caused a scene.

"Could we take a break, Hara-Sensei, I would like to stretch a bit before continuing if that's alright with you," she asked hoping to give her lower back a break for a few minutes.

"No problem, Fujioka-San, and you can call me Saturo if you'd like," he said encouraging her to use his first name.

"Oh, I couldn't do that," she said.

"Well, at least drop the Sensei," he said with a smile.

"I couldn't do that either, it would be disresepectful since you're my teacher."

"Well, I wouldn't mind."

She looked around for Kaoru and found him on one of the half pipe runs. She watched him get a lot of air as he launched himself from the pipe. He grabbed his board and did some kind of move she would never be able to name and landed gracefully back on the ground. She continued to watch him as he did one trick after another. He looked…sexy as an athlete. Her heart began to pound in her chest and her mouth went dry. _Sexy? _Where had that word come from? She had never thought of Kaoru as sexy before. She never even thought that about Hikaru and he had occupied her thoughts a lot longer through the years than Kaoru had. Her eyes never left his body and she had to admit sexy was the right word for how he looked. Her stomach tightened reminding her of the feelings he brought to her last night. Did she feel more for Kaoru than she was willing to admit?

"What do you think, Fujioka-San, are you ready to get back to it? We don't have that much time left," Hara-Sensei said.

"Huh?" she said pulling her eyes from the sight Kaoru made. "Oh, yeah, sure, I'm ready." She looked back once catching Kaoru's eye. He smiled at her and waved. She waved back feeling her cheeks flush at being caught staring.

After her lessons were over Kaoru came over to the more amateur part of the course and watched her show him what she learned. For someone who hated sports she really wasn't that bad at snow boarding. They spent hours at the resort and Haruhi found herself unable to remove the smile from her face. She and Hikaru didn't really go out on many dates. Probably because she was not one who enjoyed going out and running around somewhere, but she was glad Kaoru talked her into this trip. She was genuinely enjoying herself.

Because her mind was on other things she wasn't paying attention to where she was going and crashed right into Kaoru. She knocked him down and landed heavily on top of him. She glanced up to find him laughing. His laughter turned into a smile and she returned it. It wasn't his trademark smirk it was a true Kaoru smile. The one that reached his eyes and caused them to brighten.

Her stomach clenched again and her heartbeat sped up. _What was this feeling?_ Why was she feeling this way over spending time with Kaoru? She never thought about Kaoru in this way and it was confusing her. Then it dawned on her. Ever since Hikaru had confessed his feelings she was always focused on him and how he felt so she never thought about Kaoru or how she felt about him. Was she attracted to Kaoru now that she allowed herself to think about him in such a way? Did she feel more than friendship for him? Was now the right time to be pondering all these things? She stared at him held captive by his amber eyes.

"What?" Kaoru said laughing at her.

"Uh-nothing," she said but found herself giving him a quick kiss on the lips before she realized what she was doing. _Why the hell did I do that?_ She wondered not wanting to confuse him. This morning she told him she wasn't ready to think about a relationship and now she was kissing him. She moved to pull off of him when he grabbed her upper arms. He kissed her back gently, quickly. "Thanks," he whispered before releasing his hold on her.

The rest of the afternoon was spent pleasantly enough. They ate dinner at the lodge, and returned to their room for a quick shower before getting ready to head out to the club.

"Hey Kaoru, what do you think people wear to this club?" she asked as she sat beside him in a robe.

"Well this resort is frequented by people with money so I'm sure even the younger kids go all out."

"Oh," she said frowning. "Then what am I going to wear. I don't want to embarrass you."

He laughed. "You could never do that, but don't worry, I have your outfit all laid out for you. Go on and get dressed I can't wait to see it on you."

She didn't miss the devilish gleam in his eyes or the sinful smirk he was giving her. God, he was handsome. How had she never really noticed that before? How come he never made her heart race and now she couldn't control it every time she looked at him. And what was with the urge to want to kiss him all of a sudden?

Kaoru watched her leave the room. His heart was pounding under his rib cage. The way she had been looking at him all day was driving him mad. Was he just imagining it? Did he just wish her to look at him that way and so he was reading into something that wasn't there? No, he was sure that was not the case. She had never looked at him like that before. It gave him hope even as he was afraid to build it up only to be disappointed.

Haruhi dressed in the short silver dress Kaoru had laid out for her. It barley came to mid thigh and was subtly trimmed in midnight blue. Strappy silver heels were sitting on the floor and she wondered how she was going to walk let alone dance in those things. She wondered what Kaoru would think of how she looked. Kaoru, she had been having strange thoughts about him all day long.

She had always viewed him as her best friend, but if she were being honest with herself she had more in common with Kaoru then she did with Hikaru. She could tell him anything, she enjoyed his peaceful demeanor, he was hilarious when he wanted to be but he knew how to be serious, he was more mature than his brother, and much less selfish although he had a spoiled side as well. They enjoyed the same movies, they both enjoyed reading, and would rather do quieter activities than engage in some of the reckless, crazy ideas Hikaru came up with all the time. She stared at herself in the mirror. Kaoru was more perfect for her than Hikaru was, then any of the former hosts were really. How did she never see it before? The thought frightened her. What was she going to do about these feelings?

She was just putting silver clips in her hair to keep her bangs out of her face when Kaoru walked in once again without knocking. Warmth rushed through her at the sight of him. She felt her face heat up and knew she must be blushing like mad. Blushing for Kaoru.

Kaoru took one look at Haruhi and felt all the blood drain from his face. She looked mouth watering. Without thought he walked right up to her put his arms around her and kissed her. He pulled back, his heart was skipping beats and it was difficult to breath.

"Haruhi, you're gorgeous," he whispered his fingers running up the back of her thigh.

She gasped at his heated touch, still bothered by her previous thoughts.

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he continued to barely touch her. "I'm sorry, Haruhi, I'm so sorry. I thought if I had you I could satisfy that burning I always had for you and give you some space. I know you asked for it, but I was wrong. Having you didn't satisfy this burning. It only made me want you more. I know this isn't what you want to hear but I can't stop myself from saying it. Haruhi, I am so in love with you. I have been for a very long time."

"Kaoru…" she started but he cut her off.

"I don't want you to misunderstand me. It's not just your body I want. I want all of you all to myself. I really am so in love with you," he repeated.

She began to shake at his words. Kaoru was not an impulsive guy. He thought out everything he said and did. Which actually made his words much more dangerous than Hikarus, because Kaoru did not spout out whatever came to mind. If he said something he truly meant it. Which means he really was in love with her.

"Kaoru, I-I…" He braced himself for her rejection. He should have never let that come pouring out of his mouth after what she said this morning, but he couldn't stop himself.

"I'm scared," she whispered holding on to his upper arms in a tight, fearful grip.

Of all the things he had expected her to say that didn't even make the list.

"What are you scared of?" he asked her gently.

"I'm scared of what I feel for you, Kaoru, I-I think I'm falling for you," she barely whispered as if afraid he would hear her.

He did hear her and he couldn't have been happier.

"I'm scared too, Haruhi, I love you so much it frightens me, but I've never been more sure of anything in my life."

"Kaoru," she whispered as she looked in his eyes and there he was, Kaoru, her gentle flame. She grabbed his hair and pulled him down for a kiss.

"It would be a real shame if no one could see how beautiful you look tonight, but suddenly I have no desire to go to that club."

"Oh, good, I don't think I could dance in these shoes. What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking about how good they would look on you and I was right. So, you don't care if we miss the club?" he asked as he backed her into the bed.

"No. I don't care at all," she whispered kissing him as he fell on top of her.

"Can I make one request?"

"What?" she asked wondering what it would be?

"Leave the shoes on," he said as see caught the devilish smirk that graced his handsome face.

"You're so weird," she laughed.

He ran his hands under her back gliding them higher and higher until he gripped her shoulders. As he kissed down her neck his heart flipped over as it had last night but now he knew how Haruhi felt about him. Kaoru knew that this time when he joined himself to her together they would cross the border between friendship and love.

A/N: (again): Well, there you have it. Any thoughts? Please let me know what you think about it. I know I am repeating myself but I truly do look forward to your reviews and I truly value each and every one. So please if you have a minute to give me your input I would really appreciate it. Also I have a few more Ouran ideas running through my head but I'm not sure which pairing I would like to try next. I was wondering if you guys could help me out and vote; should it be Hikaru, Mori, or Kyoya, you decide. Please review then let me know your vote. I can't wait to hear from you. Arigato!


	11. Desperation of a phoenix

**Disclaimer: You guys know the drill. I don't own anything except this story idea. Bisco Hatori is the one to make all the profits since these characters were her idea and not mine. I am jealous! Heehee.**

A/N: Once again I must say you guys are amazing. Thank you so much for all of your awesome reviews. I truly do look forward to reading each one. Now, on to chapter 11. This does contain a lemon, well more like a small wedge. As you know I am not getting too graphic with this story. Let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy!

Haruhi walked around the museum thinking about the past few days she has shared with Kaoru. They spent all of their time together and with each thing they did her feelings only grew. She also discovered that her feelings for him were not necessarily new, just newly discovered. She had always loved him she had just never realized she was in love with him. But she was she was just afraid to tell him. Hikaru was due back tomorrow. It was easy to share this time with Kaoru without guilt, but what would happen once his brother returned?

Haruhi looked up at the painting in front of her and felt her chest tighten. It was so beautiful it pulled at something long buried inside of her.

"Hey, we're almost done here are you ready?" Kaoru asked as he stepped up beside her.

She looked at him and smiled. "Thank you for bringing me to the museum. I thought you would find this boring."

"I've grown up since high school, Haruhi. I don't find everything boring anymore. Besides, I don't care what we do as long as we are together. This is the last hall to walk through. Are you ready to go?"

"Just a minute," she said as she stared back at the painting.

"Share your thoughts. What's so interesting about staring at a painting with a couple of people in it?" he asked noticing how intently she was looking at this piece.

"They're not just people," she whispered. "They are a mother and daughter. Do you see how carefully she is holding her daughter on her lap? Do you see how lovingly she is looking down at her? Only a mother can look at you that way. No one else can look at a person in exactly that way."

"Not everyone's mother looks that way," Kaoru said as he looked at the painting. He loved his mother and he knew she loved them in her own way, but she couldn't even accurately tell the two of them apart so her love was not necessarily unconditional. As much as she loved them she was as selfish as she raised them to be. They knew her work was the love of her life.

"My mother looked at me that way. I miss her, Kaoru. Every day I miss her and the older I get the further I feel from her and my goals."

"Your goals? What are you talking about? You study harder than anyone I know. The older you get the closer you are to them not further."

She sighed never taking her eyes off the painting.

"For as long as I can remember I have been chasing after her, chasing after her dream. When I got into Ouran Academy I was so happy. It was the closest I had felt to her since she had died. I knew that a degree from Ouran gave me the best chance to get into a prestigious law school. All I wanted to do was go to class and study hard. I never intended to make friends with any of you rich bastards. I was relieved that I was looked at as something of an outcast that meant there would be no distractions from my goals."

Kaoru's chest tightened as her words began to sink in. Meeting her was the best thing that ever happened to him, to all of them. She changed his life, all their lives. Did she regret it? He couldn't bare that thought.

"I was just looking for a quiet place to study. All of you had so much time on your hands that all three libraries were so loud. They were just another place to socialize, another playground. I just needed a quiet sanctuary. Instead I stumbled into the third music room. I thought it would be quiet, empty but it was home to the Host Club the craziest room in Ouran."

Kaoru braced himself any moment now she would reveal her regrets.

"I was so close to grabbing that vase. I could feel it as it grazed my fingertips but I wasn't quick enough. Since I was a commoner it should have been so easy to avoid making friends but you guys sucked me in and took up so much of my time. You were all so different from anyone I had ever known, all so arrogant, so spoiled, so demanding. You were all crazy and so…so…annoying. You all reeled me in and you never let go."

"And you resent that," he said flatly. It wasn't a question he could hear it in her voice as she described them.

"I did at first. All I wanted was to pay back my debt and get back to focusing on my goal. But you guys were so relentless, so demanding of my time. You guys made me a host and I went from obscure scholarship student to one of the most popular students at Ouran. I never wanted to be in the spotlight but you guys dragged me into it time and time again. There were times I hated all of you."

"Haruhi," he said sadly never realizing they had made her high school years so miserable.

"But, you grew on me. All of you. As I got to know you I realized things about each of you that were endearing even though you all remained annoying, well all of you except Mori-Senpai. He was never annoying or demanding. Before I knew it I went from wanting no friends to having four close friends and two best friends. You all affected my life in both good and bad ways. The Host Club and all its outings ate up a lot of my time. I had less and less time to study."

"But you maintained the top of our class every year. You graduated valedictorian of our class and you still hold the top spot in college," he reminded her.

"Yeah, but it wasn't easy. It still isn't and the older we get the more complicated our relationships become. You and Hikaru have been so important to me. You make me long for things in life. It makes me feel far from my goal, which makes me feel far from her. After a lifetime of focusing on my goal for years now I've been distracted by other things. I feel like I'm letting her down."

"Haruhi," he whispered as he put his arm around her and nuzzled into her neck. "Your mother had you and your dad and according to Ranka she was really happy. Your mother had more in her life than just her career. I never got to meet your mother but from what I've heard I believe she would want you to have more than just a career in your life too."

Haruhi pulled away to look at him. Then she smiled that heart-stopping smile and pulled him close for a hug.

"You're right, Kaoru, Mom was happy with her family and her job. I just have to find the balance between the two like she did."

"Like I said, you've been top of our class every year, I think you're finding the balance just fine."

"Thanks, Kaoru," she whispered as she held him close. She almost whispered _I love you, _but for some reason she was still afraid to admit it even though she knew it was true.

"Are you ready to go. I feel like having some hot chocolate."

"Can we put some marshmallows in too?" she asked her eyes lighting with childish delight.

"We can have anything you want, Haruhi," he said as he grabbed her hand.

When they stepped outside the museum they saw that it was snowing.

"Snow," Kaoru said as he put his hand out to catch some. "I love the snow."

"Me too, it's perfect weather for hot chocolate."

"With marshmallows," he added and hand in hand they walked to the limo. Their fingers stayed entwined all the way to the Hitachiin Estate. She felt so happy by his side. He always knew just what to say or do to make her feel lighter; she felt the smile slip from her face though. How much longer could this last? How could they possibly hope that Hikaru would let them continue on with out causing trouble? She tried to shake off the uncomfortable feelings those thoughts had brought on. If she only had one more full day with Kaoru before Hikaru returned she was going to make the best of it.

At the mansion one of the servants built a fire in the family room and left them alone.

"I'm going to go see about that hot chocolate. I'll be right back," he said giving her a quick kiss on the lips before leaving.

He stopped at the doorway and looked her. She was so beautiful and she looked so peaceful sitting in front of the fire rubbing her tiny hands together. He felt his face flush as he thought about how those hands felt as she touched him. He wished he could freeze time and get lost in this moment with her. He knew that was impossible. It was so easy to spend this time with her, to hold her hand, to kiss her, to make love to her. It was so easy to simply be happy with her but it was only easy because Hikaru wasn't around.

He heard her small sigh of contentment as she stopped rubbing her hands and fixed a blanket around herself. Her soft smile melted his heart. She looked so happy again, she was eating, she looked like she gained a pound or two, and the shadows were gone from under her eyes. She should always look like this. She should always have a smile on her face, but what was going to happen when Hikaru returned? He walked toward the kitchen but stopped after a few steps. He ran his hand down his face hoping to wipe away the sadness he felt.

"It's okay for you to love her." The words were spoken softly behind him. He spun around quickly.

"Dad? When did you get home?"

"I've been here the whole time, watching the two of you since you've returned. It's okay for you to love her," he repeated.

"But…Hikaru…"

"Hikaru had his chance and to be honest I was troubled by how unhappy she looked when she was with him. She looks happy again, Kaoru, and it's because of you."

Before he could say anything in response to his father's words, Haruhi was walking toward them.

"I have to use the bathroom," she said continuing on her way.

"All right, I'll go get that hot chocolate," he called after her. He gave his father a sad smile and headed toward the kitchen.

His father leaned against the wall watching his youngest son. He then headed down the hallway Haruhi had walked through. If his son wouldn't listen to reason perhaps the petite girl would.

"Haruhi, a word please." Haruhi jumped in surprise by the voice that spoke as soon as she left the bathroom.

"You scared me," she said placing a hand over her racing heart as she looked at the twin's father. "Forgive me for not welcoming you back, sir, when did you get home?"

"I've been here since you arrived back from the museum. I was drinking coffee at the dining room table when you walked in."

"I'm so sorry, I didn't even see you there." (A/N: The references to not noticing the dad make sense if you have read the manga. I love their dad and his thoughts on having Ninja skills. Heehee.)

"You don't have to be sorry. I blend right in so no one ever notices I'm home, you know that. So, next semester starts in two days. Did you enjoy you're break?" he asked.

"Yes, I did," she said looking guilty.

"Then why do you look so unhappy?"

"Well, Hikaru…"

"What does he have to do with Kaoru?"

"Everything," she whispered heatedly. "This is what I've feared since I've met them. I _never_ wanted to come between them. Yet if I continue to be with Kaoru that is exactly what I'll do."

"Hikaru made his choices. Kaoru has made his. Now it is time for you to make yours. I hope you choose Kaoru. The two of you look very happy together."

"Surely, you and Mrs. Hitachiin will not be happy with me when I tear your sons apart."

"You are family to us, Haruhi. We have grown to care about you the same as we care for the twins. Our boys are adults now. They must find a way to live their lives the way they want to. It is their decision and as I've said they have already made their choices. Think about it," he said before slipping into his private study.

"There you are," Kaoru said as she rejoined him in the family room.

"I was talking to your dad," she said.

He smiled when she said this. This was not the first time his dad had stopped her to talk. "My dad really likes you."

"I like him too. I like both of your parents."

"Mom's a little over the top crazy though," he said with a fond smile on his face.

"Yeah, but it's part of her charm," she said.

She felt her chest tighten as it had in the museum. She wished she could heed his father's advice and continue to find happiness with Kaoru, but could she stay with him knowing it was going to hurt Hikaru? She missed Hikaru so much. She missed his smile, and his sarcasm, and yes, she even missed his selfish ways. That was who Hikaru was and she loved him faults and all.

She was still so angry with him but she missed his friendship and that was really the whole problem wasn't it? Could she truly never forgive him and therefore lose his friendship? But if she did forgive him and she remained with Kaoru she would still lose his friendship. The best solution seemed to be the three of them going back to just being best friends, but after dating Hikaru and sleeping with Kaoru was that even an option anymore? They were her best friends for years now; she needed them both in her life, now she feared losing them both. It pained her. It physically pained her. She put a fist to the ache in her chest. Kaoru put his hand on her arm.

"What's wrong?" he asked concern etched on every inch of his face.

"Hikaru comes back tomorrow," she said barely loud enough for him to hear.

"I know," he responded just as quietly. He looked at her in anguish and held her stare. His look was full of fear as if he looked away she would disappear. He grabbed her by her upper arms. She understood what he was feeling and she gripped him in return. It was as if they shared the same thought as he often did with his twin. If they just held on to each other than maybe they could hold on to this new feeling that was rapidly growing between them regardless of Hikaru's return. His amber eyes were pleading that look sent butterflies to her stomach. She leaned forward and kissed him. He tasted sweet like the chocolate and marshmallows that still lingered on his lips. He returned the kiss feverishly and without a word he laced his fingers tightly with hers and walked them toward his bedroom.

Once inside his spacious room he sat down on his bed and pulled her onto his lap. She straddled him. They spoke no words as they looked at each other. The fire behind his eyes was growing it sparked a fire within her as well. She slid her hand up his chest, up his neck, and through his hair. She gripped his hair in her tiny fingers and pulled him toward her for a kiss.

His kiss was different from all the ones that had come before. This kiss was desperate; it was filled with the same desperation she had been feeling all day. He pulled apart for air and when he dove back in it was yet another new kiss from him.

Kaoru reached for her lips again pouring all of the love in felt for her into that kiss. She had to know how he felt. It couldn't end. It just couldn't end. He loved her too much for it to end once Hikaru was back.

He flipped her around so that she lay beneath him on his bed. He looked down at her. "I am so in love with you, Fujioka Haruhi," he whispered and before she had a chance to say a word he was kissing her once more.

His fingers trailed down her arms. His lips lingered on her collarbone where he nipped and kissed her skin. Like the gentle flame that he was his tongue licked at her until she caught fire and lost all thought entirely. The world was reduced to nothing more than the two of them; to nothing more than his touch, his lips, and this overwhelming desire to belong to him completely.

Kaoru felt her tiny hands run up his skin under his shirt; she removed his shirt, hers followed. Her fingers grazed his abs on her way down to his belt. For each piece of clothing she removed he returned the favor.

That feeling returned as he slipped inside her, that same feeling he had the first time he was with her, that connection he felt with no one else, that connection that was stronger than the one he carried for his brother. He held her so tightly she grunted in pain. "Sorry," he whispered but did not ease his hold. He could not ease it. He couldn't let her go even the tiniest bit and so he held her closely against his body.

Hikaru impatiently tapped his fingers on the limo door. In seconds he would be home. Relief coursed through him at that thought. He was so glad he had talked his mother into returning a day early. He missed Haruhi. He missed Kaoru. He had been such an idiot and now he needed to apologize to Kaoru and get his help in getting Haruhi back. He knew his brother was angry with him but he was confident enough to know his brother always helped him when he needed it. He would help him now. Kaoru was always there for him. The limo stopped outside the mansion doors and Hikaru ran up the vast steps and burst inside. He looked everywhere for Kaoru. When he didn't find him he headed toward the stairs to the second floor. He couldn't wait to see his brother's surprise at his unexpected return.

Haruhi's fingertips touched every part of him she could reach as he moved above her and he was burning for her. He felt like a phoenix; her touch, her warmth burst him into flames. She tightened her grip on him and as she screamed his name in wild abandon he was reduced to nothing more than ash. But like the phoenix he raised again from the ashes the heat building until he burst into flames once more as her name was torn from his lips.

He finally released his death grip on her body. He braced himself on his hands above her. He looked down at her and smiled at the blissful look on her face. She had never looked happier or more sated. Surely she wouldn't walk away from this feeling. This unbelievable love between them.

Hikaru finally reached Kaoru's door and flung it open. He stared in shock at Haruhi laying beneath his brother a look of pure happiness and contentment on her beautiful face. He struggled to find his voice and when he did there was no doubt his words reached every corner of the vast mansion.

"NO WAY," he shouted. ""YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. THERE IS NO DAMN WAY."

They pulled apart quickly. Haruhi tried to cover herself, as she feared the anger in Hikaru's eyes. What the hell was he doing here? He wasn't supposed to return until tomorrow. Hikaru seethed in the doorway. His hands balled into fists and his eyes were lit with fury. She pushed Kaoru away from her, held his pillow in front of her body and gathered her clothes as quickly as she could. She ran into the bathroom and shut and locked the door.

She tried to hear if Hikaru was saying anything to Kaoru. She listened for any sounds that indicated he was killing his brother, but she could hear nothing over the roar of her own blood rushing through her ears. Her heart was beating out of her chest. Once fully dressed she put her hand on the doorknob but froze. Could she really step out of the safety of the bathroom? Could she really face Hikaru's wrath? She needed a plan. If they just returned from their private airstrip then surely their driver was still out front with the limo right? She hated to run out on Kaoru without a word after what they just shared, but she could not face Hikaru right now. Not after what he had just seen. So much for not telling him they slept together just yet.

She took a couple of deep breaths, opened the door and with as much sped as she could gather she raced for the doorway. As she had hoped she surprised Hikaru just enough to push her way past his body. She prepared herself to be grabbed by him but it never came. She never looked back as she continued her sprint to the front door. She was thankful she knew this part of the mansion so well. This would not have been a good time to get lost.

"Haruhi," Kaoru yelled as he chased after her still buttoning his jeans. Hikaru grabbed his arm.

"Haruhi," their mother said in surprise as the girl dashed past her heading for the front door.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, please, Mrs. Hitachiin, please forgive me."

"Forgive you for what dear?" Mrs. Hitachiin asked as she tried to keep up with the girl but in her high heels she just wasn't fast enough. She made it to the front door just in time to hear her beg the driver to take her home. The driver looked up at the mistress of the house. She shook her head yes as she saw the desperation on Haruhi's face. The girl smiled in relief as the driver opened the door for her. She scrambled inside and never looked back.

Yuzuha closed the large wooden doors and headed for the stairs. She had heard Hikarus shout upon their return but she had not made out his words. The only thing she heard clearly was the word 'NO.' She didn't miss her sons words now as they continued to shout at each other regardless of the fact that they were on the second floor. She stepped onto the first step when a gentle hand stopped her.

"They are men now darling. This is their fight," her husband said from behind her. "They will resolve it. They love each other too much not too."

"I'm not so sure," she whispered a worried look on her face. "They both love her too."

"Yes, they do," he said. "They may just discover they have to work together to not lose her completely."

She stopped at the wisdom of her husband's words. She would stay out of it for now, but if they couldn't make this discovery on their own then she might plant the seed and help them along.

"STOP, I'LL GO AFTER HER," Hikaru shouted pulling Kaoru away from the direction of the stairs. He looked as if he wanted to kill one or both of them.

Kaoru pulled out of his brother's grip and pushed him into the wall.

"NO YOU WON'T, SHE DOESN'T WANT YOU. YOU HURT HER REMEMBER?" Kaoru yelled back as he ran down the stairs after Haruhi.

"DAMN YOU," Hikaru shouted racing down the stairs after his brother. Kaoru was already out the front door by the time he hit the bottom step. A strong arm stopped his forward motion and jerked him to a stop. He was surprised his father had such a strong grip. His mother looked troubled as she stood beside him.

"LET GO," Hikaru shouted as he struggled to get out of his fathers hold.

"Perhaps it's time to think before you act, Hikaru," his father said calmly.

He just glared at his father as he continued his struggle. His father held firm.

"Acting on impulse and not thinking is what led to all this in the first place isn't it?" his father questioned quietly.

He pulled out of his fathers grasp, took two steps forward and stopped. His father's words had stopped him. He was right even if he was too angry to admit it. He didn't want his father to be right. He wanted this fixed.

"Do something," he said to his mother hoping she could help him somehow. "They were _sleeping_ together and I don't mean laying side by side snoring, I mean full on, bodies entwined, sleeping together."

"And what would you have me do?" his mother asked calmly. "They're adults, Hikaru."

"Ugh! I hate this," Hikaru said as he ran up the stairs two at a time.

Haruhi ran inside her apartment, slammed and locked the door then pressed her back against it. Hikaru looked angry enough to kill someone. It wasn't hard to guess that she and Kaoru were the ones on his list. She had felt his anger coming off of him in waves, but underneath all of the anger she had seen his pain too. Damn it, he hurt her too, but not in quite the same way. She didn't want to care, but she did. She slid down the door and finally allowed her tears to come. Once they did there was no stopping them.

The pounding on her door scared the shit out of her. Was it Hikaru? Was he angry enough to kill her? Did he already kill Kaoru? Holy crap! Why was she thinking like this? Did she really think Hikaru was capable of that? Before she could ponder that question seriously a voice came through the door.

"Haruhi, Haruhi, it's me. Let me in," Kaoru said as he continued to pound on her door. Relief coursed through her. At least she didn't have to face Hikaru just yet.

She pulled herself off of the floor and opened the door. The moment he stepped inside and saw her tears he pulled her in his arms and held her tight.

"Shhh, it's okay. Shhh, shhhh, it's going to be okay," he said as he tightened his hold on her.

Those were the same words he said to sooth her during their first time together. That thought just made her cry harder.

"No, it's not," she choked out. "It's not going to be okay."

She pulled back slightly so she could look at him.

"Kaoru, I don't think I can do this. I don't think we should do this."

His heart stopped completely at her words. He struggled to get a breath. He felt slightly dizzy as the seconds ticked by. He willed his body to take mercy on his lungs and remember how to breathe.

"Haruhi, please," he whispered once he got enough air to do so. "Please, don't do this."

"But, Kaoru, this is what I've always feared. I never wanted to come between you two."

"I know. I never wanted that either, but he had his chance and in truth it's not okay that he hurt you."

"I know. I know he hurt me when he kissed that girl but what he just walked in on was much worse, Kaoru, you know it was. We hurt him. I saw it on his face."

"I know, I know," he said his own eyes filling with tears as he pulled her back in his arms. "I know we hurt him. I know that. It hurts me to know he's hurting, but I love you. You're happy with me. I know you are."

"I am. I am happy with you, but don't you see this will hurt you too. You told me yourself that Hikaru is more important to you than I am. If you lose him it will hurt you too."

"That was years ago, Haruhi, before my love for you grew into what it is today. You are more important to me than him."

She gasped as she looked up at him. "Kaoru, you, you shouldn't say that."

"Why not. It's the truth. Hikaru is important to me. He is. He always will be, but you… I love you, Haruhi. Don't push me away. Don't push away what could be between us."

"Kaoru," she whispered full of pain. She didn't know how to continue.

"Hikaru only hurts you. Please open yourself to what we could have. Pain is not your friend, Haruhi. Let go of the past and open your heart to me."

"The past?" she whispered as she looked at him with questioning eyes.

"Yes, the past. You hold onto the pain of your mothers death, the pain of having to parent your father when he should have been parenting you, the pain you fight through every day as you struggle to reach your goal, the pain you endure from Hikaru because it's what you're used to. It's familiar so you hang on to it, but I repeat, pain is not your friend. Let it go and let me guard your heart."

"Kaoru," she whispered. His words made her burst into a fresh set of tears.

Kaoru pulled her in his arms.

"Don't leave me, Haruhi, please don't leave me."

She pulled him down and kissed him deeply. Kaoru's kiss was gentle but it still tasted like desperation. She still felt it herself.

"I'm so tired," she whispered against him feeling completely drained from her fear and sadness.

"Me too," he said as he took her hand and walked her to her bedroom. He pulled the covers down and gestured for her to crawl in. When she did he slipped in beside her. It was different sharing this tiny bed with her compared to his king sized bed at home, but it was just what he needed the closer the better.

He kissed her once again pouring all the love he felt for her into the kiss.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you want to lose this feeling?"

"I don't. I really don't, but I don't want to hurt you and it _will_ hurt you if Hikaru never forgives you."

"That will hurt me," he admitted. "But it will hurt me more if you leave me. I love you, Haruhi, I really do. Stay my girl. Please, stay my girl forever."

"I want to, Kaoru, I really do, but I don't know if I can. I don't think you are considering how much it will hurt you if you lose Hikaru forever. Right now, you are thinking about yourself, Hikaru is thinking about himself. I am trying to think about all of us."

"I'm not just thinking about myself. I am thinking about you too. I can make you happy."

"I know, but is that best for the three of us? Is it, I just don't know and I don't know if its best to make a decision that will affect all of our lives in the heat of all this drama. Everyhting is happening so fast. It's too much too soon. I can't even think straight anymore," she said crying into his chest.

"Alright, it's alright. Let's get some sleep and we'll take our time weighing all the pros and cons, okay?"

"Okay," she whispered. "Thank you, Kaoru."

"Just promise me you won't push me away until we've talked it all the way through, alright?"

"Alright, I promise."

He held her tight as her tears began to subside. He continued to hold her as he felt her relax against him as sleep claimed her. He took a calming breath digging deep for patience. Haruhi was a very cautious person. In his desire to claim her as his own he knew he moved too fast. He needed to slow down and help her work through all of her fears regarding all three of them. He took another deep breath. He tried to make peace with this decision but one thought kept plaguing his mind. When all was said and done was he going to lose her? He tightened his hold as he tried desperately to hold back his tears.

A/N (again): Well, there you have it. I know, I know your heart is breaking for all of them right? You wish I would just put them together and let them find there happily ever after, right? I want to also, but let's face it if this were real it wouldn't come so easily. Love is worth fighting for. So, please let me know your thoughts. Hang in there things will eventually get resolved. From what I have outlined there are about 4-5 more chapters. I'm sorry if it's dragging on but I do hope you stick with me until the end. Also, please, please, let me know what you thought about this chapter? Who do you feel the most sorry for? Oh, and don't forget to vote on my next story pairing. So far the standings are as follows: Hikaru-2, Mori-2, Kyoya-1. I Look forward to hearing from you as always. Arigato!


	12. All of us are hurting

**Disclaimer: I do not now nor shall I ever own Ouran High School Host Club. That will always belong to Bisco Hatori. BTW has anyone read Millennium Snow yet? I just bought it and I loved it! So cute! She really is a genius and her artwork is to die for!**

A/N: Thank you as always for all of your awesome reviews. I love reading each and every one of them and I mean it when I say they keep me inspired. I am not so crazy about this chapter, but I needed to express the twins feelings before we get back to the heart of the story. Thank you for the support of the Kaoru and Haruhi relationship. I wasn't expecting it especially from the die hard Hikaru fans! It has made writing my first fanfic so enjoyable. You guys are the best. Well, here is chapter 12! Hope you enjoy!

When Kaoru arrived back at the mansion the family was sitting and eating dinner. He really didn't want to sit with Hikaru at the moment so he headed for the stairs but his mother stopped him.

"Kaoru, won't you join us? I haven't seen you for a while."

"Sure, Mom," he said ignoring his brother as the maids brought out another table setting.

"So how did the show in Italy go?" he asked her.

And off she went, retelling every aspect of the runway show right down to the timing of the music as the girls stomped it out.

"The pieces you designed for the collection were a big hit," his mother told him. "You are going to have a bright future in fashion industry someday, Kaoru. You both are. So, tell me, how was your break?"

"I told you how his break went. He had sex with my girlfriend," Hikaru exploded standing up and knocking his chair to the ground.

"No, I made love to my girl friend," Kaoru said harshly standing up as well.

"Haruhi is mine," Hikaru said.

"NO, she isn't. She broke up with you when you cheated on her."

"Oh, so you helped her return the favor?" Hikaru said angrily.

"She didn't cheat on you. You are no longer going out."

"I could kill you right now, Kaoru."

"I could kill you for hurting her in the first place."

"Hurt! You have the nerve to talk about hurt? I only kissed someone. YOU SLEPT WITH HER! Something I never even had the chance to do. You took her first time. Her first time, Kaoru. Why would you take her from me?" Hikaru punched him. He fell to the ground. He reached down and grabbed a fist full of Kaoru's shirt. "How could you do this? You know how much I love her. How long I've loved her. Since our first year of High School.. You told me you gave up on her. You encouraged me, you cheered me on and now you take her from me. Take her in a way I never even had her. HOW COULD YOU TAKE HER FROM ME?"

"I DIDN'T TAKE HER FROM YOU!" Kaoru yelled back yanking his brother to the ground beside him. "I DIDN'T TAKE HER. YOU THREW HER AWAY! You hurt her, Hikaru in more ways then one. I cheered you on once but I was wrong. You didn't deserve her."

"I'll kill you," Hikaru said dangerously low.

"She. Is. NOT. Happy. With. YOU!" Kaoru said enunciating each word carefully. "Don't you even carer about that? You loved her smile. You said her smile was your reason for living. Well, when was the last time you saw her smile, Hikaru?"

Hikaru stared at his brother, opened his mouth to say something then clamped it shut. He continued to stare. Suddenly he stopped his hold, let go of Kaoru and ran out of the house.

Kaoru flopped back on the hard wood floor and stared at the ceiling. _What the hell._

Hikaru drove around for hours thinking about all he had seen, all he had heard, and all he had done. He eventually let his mind wonder and drove around aimlessly. He found himself in front of Haruhi's apartment. A quick glance at the clock told him it was late at night. Haruhi's apartment looked dark. Could he face her? Did he want to face her? _Yes!_ He missed her. Why should he give up what he wanted because of stupid Kaoru?

He parked his car, ran up the stairs, and raised his hand to knock. He glanced at the keys in his hand. Her apartment key was still on his keychain. A smirked crossed his face. There was no reason to disturb her just yet. It would be much more fun to surprise her. He quietly let himself in and slowly opened her bedroom door. He watched her sleeping face. She was so beautiful. How could he possibly let her go? Surely she was as confused as he was right? Didn't he deserve a fair shot at getting her back? At first he thought it was impossible since he had made such a horrible mistake, but now she had made one too. What he had done wasn't so terrible. She would understand that now, wouldn't she?

He took a deep breath. _There's only one way to find out._ He crawled into her tiny bed with her. The moment he wrapped his arms around her that tight ache in his chest disappeared. He took his first deep breath in almost two weeks. He tightened his hold and kissed up the side of her neck. She stiffened in his arms.

"Hi-Hikaru?" she mumbled turning around to face him. She was as tense as he had ever felt her. "What-what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to get back what's mine," he whispered against her skin as he continued to plant heated kisses up and down her neck.

"Hikaru," she whispered trying to push him away but he held her close. His mouth trailed up her jaw and when it tried to land on her own she used all her strengthen to push him back.

"Stop it, Hikaru."

"Why?" he asked harshly. "Why should I? You dated me for months and you always stopped me from fully having you. I have wanted you for years, Haruhi. I figure if you can give yourself to Kaoru then you can give yourself to me."

"Hikaru," she said continuing to push him off.

"Come on, Haruhi. I will forgive you for sleeping with him. I know you were hurt and I know you wanted to get back at me so I'll accept this punishment and call us even." he said as he rolled to straddle her.

She looked up at his face, shock and disbelief on her own. "I- I didn't sleep with Kaoru to get back at you."

"Yes you did. Why else would you do it?" he asked tightening his hold on her wrists in anger.

"I-I…"

"ANSWER ME! What other reason could you have for sleeping with him?"

She opened her mouth than closed it tightly. He was furious. It didn't seem wise to tell him that Kaoru made her burn for him. That she wanted him to be her first, but she couldn't lie to him either. She looked up at him with her lips pressed together.

Hikaru understood her well. He seemed to know why she wouldn't answer. That infuriated him as much as it hurt him. Did she really just _want_ Kaoru so badly she couldn't resist him? _Well that's not fair. _Why should Kaoru deserve her and he didn't?

"Why, Haruhi, Why?" he asked as he began to kiss her collar bone. He sensed her moving underneath him but he was too lost in his own mental battle to register that she was struggling. "Don't you miss me as much as I miss you?"

"I- I do miss you but not like this." she whispered trying to pull away.

"Come on, Haruhi, I can't stand that we're apart. I miss you. I need you. You know I do. Please, please share this closeness with me."

His hold on her wrist was getting painful. Her heart was aching for him. She knew he wasn't doing it on purpose. He was getting desperate, and a desperate Hikaru was a dangerous Hikaru.

"Hikaru, please. Please let go of me. I don't want this with you," she cried. She clamped down on her mouth wishing she could take back what she just said, but she couldn't.

He whipped his head up to look at her. The anger in his amber eyes was unmistakable but pain was there as well.

Kaoru had been unable to sleep. He knew it was late, but he needed to check on Haruhi. He knew she was hurt by all of this. He might have a chance of getting some sleep if he could just see for himself that she wasn't crying any more. He frowned as he noticed Hikaru's R8 Spyder parked out front. He pulled his Porsche up behind it and parked. He was up the stairs in no time, but then he stopped. Where they talking? Should he disturb them? Had she taken him back? That thought turned his stomach and caused his heart to clench painfully in his chest. He leaned his head against the door. They weren't dating so did he have any right to barge in and demand to know what was going on?

"Why did you give yourself to Kaoru? WHY, HARUHI? ANSWER ME!"

Kaoru heard Hikaru's shouting and that was all the answer he needed. He turned the knob expecting resistance but it opened easily. _Stupid!_

"Hikaru, stop," Haruhi shouted.

"I'm not letting you go until you answer me," he said looking down at her.

Kaoru walked in and knocked his brother off of her. Because he had such a tight hold on her wrists they both fell to the ground.

"HARUHI," Kaoru cried.

"HARUHI!" Hikaru said letting go of her.

"Hikaru, I miss you too, but I won't do that with you. And what I do is my business. I don't have to answer to you."

"What the hell were you doing?" Kaoru asked as he watched Haruhi rubbing her wrists.

"Taking back what's mine," Hikaru said. "Haruhi belongs to me."

"Are you crazy? She is afraid of you. Is that what you want? Is that what you came here to do?" Kaoru said. "Add to her fear?"

Hikaru looked at Haruhi and for the first time saw the fear in her eyes. It was a familiar look and that pained him. What the hell was he doing? An image flashed through his mind. An image of Haruhi lying beneath his brother with a look of pure bliss on her lovely face. Kaoru made her look like that, not him. When was the last time he made her smile?

"Damn," he said running his shaking hand through his hair. "I'm so sorry, Haruhi. I didn't mean to hurt you or frighten you. I- I just want you back. I want you back but I won't force you. I'd never force you. Just think about it," he said. He ran his hand through her hair and then left.

"Get back in bed," Kaoru said gently helping her off the floor. "I'm going to lock the door. You need to remember to put the chain on, idiot. I'll be right back."

Haruhi crawled into bed and burst into tears.

"Haruhi," Kaoru said the moment he saw her in tears. He climbed into bed next to her and began to run his fingers over her limbs. He gasped when he saw the light bruises forming on her delicate wrists."Are you hurt anywhere else?"

"Just my heart," she said as a fresh set of tears began to fall. "Dammit, I hate to cry. I've never cried so much in my life as I have the past few weeks."

"What did he do to you?" Kaoru asked softly as he held her to him.

"He-he wanted to- he wanted me to…"

"I'm going to kill him," Kaoru said interrupting her.

"Hikaru is so mad, Kaoru. He's so mad, and he's so hurt. I never wanted to hurt either of you, but when you told me he was more important to you than I was I knew you wouldn't be hurt if I dated him. Hikaru doesn't feel that way. This will hurt him. It _is _hurting him. I can't stand it. I can't stand that all of us are hurting."

"I know, I know. I can't stand it either, but it's going to be okay," he said trying to sooth her.

"How? Tell me how?" she pleaded.

"I don't know," he said sighing in defeat.

Hikaru drove straight home and went into the family room. He sank down on the leather couch and put his head in his hands. He was so angry with himself over his actions. He could see the fear on her face in his mind. He then pictured the happiness on her face while Kaoru held her. The gentle way he was holding her while she was beneath him. _Urgh!_ He would do anything to get that image out of his head. A knot formed in his stomach when he thought about his own touch. He looked down at his shaking hands and grimaced. He held her wrists so tightly he probably left bruises again. "Dammit! What the hell is wrong with me?"

Hikaru heard someone enter the family room. He frowned not really wanting to have another argument with Kaoru right now. He turned when he felt a slight weight shift the couch. His mother sat beside him and handed him a cup of tea.

"Thanks," he muttered taking the cup from her hands.

"Well?' she asked when he remained silent.

"Well, what?" he asked not really wanting to argue with her either.

She lifted a perfectly arched brow.

"What is there to say?" he asked quietly. "I really screwed up and I can't seem to stop myself from continuing. I love her so much, Mom."

"I know you do," she said sincerely. "But how do you love her?"

"What? What do you mean?"

"What does she mean to you Hikaru?"

"She means everything to me, same as Kaoru."

"What do you love about her?"

"Everything."

"Be more specific."

"I love that she can tell us apart. Do you know if there were a hundred people in a pitch dark room she would still know me and Kaoru? I love that her smile can take me from grumpy and depressed to complete bliss in 0.1 seconds. I love that know matter how much I would annoy her or how much I would hang all over her she still put up with me. Still wanted to spend time with me. I love that I can breath easier just because she's near. And I love that no matter how stupid and selfish I act she is still always there for me."

"That sounds more like friendship than romantic love to me, Hikaru." his mother said quietly.

He turned to look at her. "No, that's not true. I-I love her, I want to be with her forever."

"But you said nothing about your heart. Think about it, Hika. Maybe it's time you really thought about what kind of love you feel for her. I'm home for the next week if you need to talk."

Before he could say a word, before he could tell her she was wrong she had slipped out the door. Hikaru thought about what his mother had just said. Was she wrong or was she right?

In the morning Haruhi woke up feeling ridiculously warm. Looking down she saw that Kaoru was once again wrapped around her like a vine.

"Kaoru, Kaoru, get up," she said trying to wiggle herself a little lee way from his hold. His grip only tightened.

"It can't possibly be time to get up yet," he mumbled pulling her closer. "We just fell asleep a few hours ago."

"Well, you can stay in bed, you and Hikaru don't have classes until tomorrow, but my first class this semester starts this morning. Come on, Kaoru, let go, you're like some kind of octopus man."

"Bahahahaha," he started laughing as he looked down and saw how every limb found a way to wrap around some part of her. "Sorry, you're right. Sheesh, even in my sleep I can't get close enough to you. Hey, are you alright?"

"Alright enough to go to class," she said flatly."Stay as long as you want, just lock the door behind you, okay."

"I'm going to have the locks changed before I go."

"I don't think that's necessary. You heard him, he won't force me."

"I know, I'll just feel better if you're the only one with a key, and use the chain from now on will you?"

"Alright, alright, man, you're worser than my dad."

"I'll come by after your class and give you the new key."

"Alright," she said. Though she didn't see the need to change the locks she just didn't have the strength to argue with him.

Kaoru returned home after the locksmith left. The family was eating breakfast. Seeing Hikaru calming eating after what he did infuriated him. He loomed over Hikaru's chair and jerked it away from the table.

"What the hell?' Hikaru asked dropping his chop sticks on the floor.

"Haruhi spent half the night crying and shaking in my arms," Kaoru said.

"I don't need a lecture from you," Hikaru said feeling bad enough about his actions. "I know what I did."

Kaoru grabbed Hikaru into a standing position.

"I love her, Hikaru," Kaoru said passionately.

"Not as much as I do," Hikaru said back.

"I love her more. I don't hurt her," Kaoru defended.

"You don't love her more. I know you don't. You didn't shed one tear when she rejected you. That's not love," Hikaru said troubled by how easily Kaoru had accepted her rejection all those years ago.

"SHE NEVER REJECTED ME," Kaoru yelled.

"What?" Hikaru asked unable to believe what he just heard.

"She never rejected me," Kaoru repeated.

"You-you mean she accepted you and you refused her? Refused her after confessing to her. That's not love either," Hikaru said.

"She didn't accept me," Kaoru confessed.

"What the hell are you talking about? How could she not accept you or reject you? She would have had to have done one or the other." Hikaru gasped. "You never confessed did you?"

"Oh, yes I did. I told her I loved her but I never gave her a chance to answer me. Before she could react, before she could tell me how she felt, I told her _you _were more important to me than she was. That was true at the time and I never regretted it until now. Now I wonder what her answer would have been. I wonder who she would have chosen, me or you. I love her more than you do, Hikaru, and if you ever pull a stunt like that again, I'll kill you. If we're too evenly matched and I can't do it, I'll call Mori-Senpai and Hunny-Senpai. They will be more than happy to lend me a hand."

"Kaoru," Hikaru whispered in shock and shame. He had no idea his brother wasn't rejected. He had no idea his brother had stepped aside for him. Once again Kaoru proved himself the selfless one.

"I'm serious, Hikaru, stop making her cry or you'll be the one crying."

"I don't want to make her cry," Hikaru said tightening his grip on the front of Kaoru's shirt.

"You've been making her cry for months now and the past few weeks she can't seem to stop."

"I know, I know," Hikaru said putting his head on his brother's shoulder. "I just don't want to lose her. I can't lose her. I can't lose either of you. I hate all this fighting, all this anger, all this fear. All of this loneliness is killing me, Kaoru. I miss you. I miss her too. I miss you both so much it hurts."

Hikaru began crying. Kaoru released the grip he had on Hikaru's shirt and held his brother. "You'll never lose me, Hikaru, but I can't speak for Haruhi. If you keep forcing your angry emotions on her, if you keep showing her nothing but your jealousy and lack of control you're going to push her away."

"No, don't say that. I can't live without her, Kaoru. I love her too much. She belongs in our world. She's the only one who does. She's too important. I can't lose her," Hikaru said his pleading voice causing tears to form in Kaoru's eyes.

"You don't have to lose her, Hika," their mother said from her spot at the table. They both looked at her.

"You're not good for her, Hikaru, and all you can feel around her is jealousy and anger which means she's no good for you either."

"Mom," Hikaru whined not wanting to hear that.

She held up her hand to stop his words. "Dating her has not worked out. It's hasn't made either of you happy but that doesn't mean you have to lose her. If she belongs to Kaoru you can still have her in your life and you can find someone who doesn't cause you so many anguished emotions."

"That won't work either," Kaoru said sadly his own tears flowing freely now. "She's so afraid of hurting Hikaru and tearing us apart that she is pushing me away. I'm losing her too."

"No," Hikaru said grabbing Kaoru's shirt in desperation. "No, no, no. You have to have her or we're both going to lose her, Kaoru."

"I know," Kaoru said sadly. "But I don't know what to do to get her past this."

"Leave it to me boys."

They both looked at their mother. She was wearing that mischievous Hitachiin smirk they both inherited along with her ability to formulate a plan.

"The three of us need to talk," she said to her twins. Haruhi was a strong woman and strong women belonged in the Hitachiin family. They were famous for it. Haruhi was destined to be a Hitachiin, she had known it since she first met the girl and saw how she kept her boys in line. She just hadn't known which twin she was meant for.

Kaoru and Hikaru smiled in relief at least someone was thinking of a plan.

Kaoru was waiting outside Haruhi's class.

"Hey, here's your key," he said handing her a shiny new key.

"Thanks," she said turning to walk away.

"Hey, want to go get something to eat?" he asked desperately hoping to spend some time with her.

"Uh-sorry but I'm meeting up with someone in the cafeteria."

"Oh, that's okay. Maybe we can get together later than?" he asked hopefully.

"Sorry again, Kaoru. I'm meeting up with Mori-Senpai so he can help me with this class I'm taking. He's had this Professor so he said he'd help me get ahead with my work."

"Oh, alright, well, give me call or text me."

"Okay, I will."

He watched her walk away. He felt like crying again. He could feel her pushing him away, feel the distance she was creating between them. He sure hoped whatever his mother had planned was going to make a difference. He didn't know how mach more he could take. _Haruhi, I love you._

A/N: (again): Well, there you have it. Please let me know what you thought about this chapter. As I've said a million times I really do appreciate your comments and they really do give me the boost I need to find the time to get on the computer and type out the next chapter. The voting is as follows: Hikaru;5/Mori;4/Kyoya;1. If you haven't voted already please do so. Thanks in advance for your awesome reviews can't wait to read what you think. Arigato!


	13. Ties that bind us

**Disclaimer: You know the drill! Nothing is mine but this story! I get no profits just your awesome reviews!**

A/N: Well, here is chapter 13! I really enjoyed writing this one and I have the rest of the story fully outlined and I'm pretty pleased with the results. I hope you guys agree. Please continue to read and review. You are probably tired of hearing this but I do truly appreciate and enjoy reading each and every one and they have kept me inspired. Gah! I'm rambling. Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

Haruhi was walking down the hall feeling like the worst person in the world. She knew by the look on Kaoru's face that he was hoping to spend more time with her. She hated denying him, she hated hurting him, but it hurt her too. It was just too hard to be with him and not _be _with him. Ever since she realized how she felt about him her heart sped up, her stomach tightened, and she just wanted to kiss him senseless.

These feelings were so foreign to her that they set her nerves on edge. She was hurting. Kaoru was hurting. Hikaru was hurting. She couldn't figure out how to go back to how things used to be among the three of them. She wasn't even sure that was a possibility any more. Urgh! It was frustrating. This jumbled mess in her mind and heart was making it hard to concentrate and the semester just started.

She took a deep breath. She had to clear her thoughts. She had to decompress or her head was going tho explode. The problem was how to calm down. She looked at her watch and headed toward the cafeteria. She had meant it when she told Kaoru she was meeting someone there, the other party just wasn't aware of it. She knew there was only one person who could calm her screaming nerves right now. His cool, detached way of looking at everything had a very calming effect on her. Even if she said nothing his calm and collected presence always made her feel better.

If she had any hope of gaining any sanity this day she needed to spend a little time in his proximity. She hoped he didn't mind.

"Hey, there's Fujioka-san," Tarumi said to his friend as he caught sight of her walking to the cafeteria.

"She seems to be alone for once too," his friend commented.

"Yeah, that's rare," Tarumi said.

"It's not just rare it's unheard of. If one of those annoying twins isn't draped all over her she is usually shadowed by one of the other former hosts from high school," his friend said.

"That's true. I often wonder how she put up with them all these years. They're each annoying in their own way," Tarumi said. Then he smiled. "But I heard that she broke up with that hot headed twin. So, now's my chance. I think I'll follow her onto the line and start up a conversation. With any luck she'll join me for lunch."

"I assume that's your way of telling me to get lost," his friend said with a smirk on his face.

"Sorry, just for today."

"I understand. You've had your eye on her for quite a while now."

"I sure have and maybe without those annoying hosts around her I'll have some success," Tarumi said with a smile on his face.

He followed her into the cafeteria and frowned when she went no where near the food line.

"Where is she going?" his friend asked.

"I don't know. Damn, is she meeting one of them here?" Tarumi muttered with displeasure.

"Whoa, she must be crazy. She's making a beeline for Ohtori," his friend said in shock.

"Ohtori!" Tarumi said. "What is she doing with Ohtori?"

"I don't know but she's a brave one I'll give her that. No one dares to go within fifty feet of him when he is studying. Surely she's not foolish enough to incur his wrath."

Tarumi sighed. "She won't face his wrath."

_"__Everyone_ faces it. Ohtori makes _no_ exceptions," his friend said confidently.

"She is the only exception," Tarumi said. "They have been friends for years."

"Suoh is his best friend and even he gets reemed when he disturbs Ohtori's studies."

"She won't," Tarumi said from experience.

"How can you be so sure? This is Ohtori we're talking about," his friend asked curiously.

"I've seen this before. Sometimes she sits and talks to him. Sometimes she sits and says nothing at all. But at no time have I ever seen him tell her to go away and leave him alone like he does to Suoh," Tarumi said.

"This I've got to see."

"Me too,"Tarumi said taking a seat close enough to see their interaction but not close enough to raise suspicion. Unfortunately that meant he was too far away to hear their conversation. He would have to settle for just watching. As he watched her approach him he wondered if Ohtori had a chance with the pretty little former host.

As soon as her eyes fell on Kyoya she went directly to his table and plopped down in the chair next to him. She folded her arms on the table in front of her and buried her face in them.

Kyoya whipped his head to the right getting his glare in place for whoever dared disturb him. Upon seeing Haruhi his expression cleared and he repressed his sigh. He stared at the top of her head. How many times had she disturbed his do not disturb radius? He smirked, more times than he could count.

He waited for his familiar anger to come about this disturbance but it didn't. It never did. Not for her. He went back to his studies knowing from experience she would tell him why she was here or she wouldn't. It could go either way really. Half the time that she ruffled the atmosphere around him she eventually told him why. The other half of the time she simply sat beside him in silence for a while then left without a word.

Once in a while his curiosity got the best of him and he pushed her for an explanation. Ten minutes passed, fifteen minutes passed, and nothing. She didn't even lift her head and look at him. Normally he was content to let her say nothing at all but he was worried. It was obvious she was upset. She wouldn't be here if she wasn't. She didn't disturb his precious study time on a whim or because she was bored like Tamaki would have. She was too practical for that. So, back to the problem at hand; what had upset her? Did Hikaru do something to her again? That thought didn't sit well with him. Not after recalling her tears. Perhaps he could get her to talk.

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and stared at the top of her head. After a few minutes she lifted her head and stared at him. He smirked once she felt his stare. Apparently her self preservation skills have increased over the years.

"Well?" he enquired as she continued to stare at him. He frowned when her face fell.

"Haruhi," he said in concern.

She looked away, took a deep breath, then faced him.

"I slept with Kaoru," she whispered.

"WHAT?" he shouted in shock.

"Shhhh, Kyoya-Senpai!"

He inwardly cringed as he heard his own voice echo around them. He glared at the people who stopped and stared at them. When they looked away he turned his attention back to Haruhi.

"Ugh!" she said before hitting her forehead down on the table. "I'm so stupid, right? Go on, Senpai, tell me I'm stupid."

"I'm not sure stupid is the word I would use," he said watching her carefully thinking about this new piece of information she just shared with him.

She lifted her head off the table her large brown eyes locked on his.

"What word would you use?" she asked curiously.

"Dangerous," he said.

"Dangerous?"

"Yes, dangerous. Have you considered Hikaru's reaction when he finds out? And he _will _find out."

She seemed to shrink in her seat causing his frown to deepen.

"Hikaru walked in on us yesterday," she said barely above a whisper.

"WHAT?" Kyoya yelled in shock once more.

He glared at Haruhi resentful of the attention that came their way once more.

"Don't glare at me, Kyoya," she said giving him a glare of her own.. "It's your loud voice that's drawing all the attention."

He pulled his glare back. He had to concede to the truth of her words. He took a deep composing breath as he removed his glasses. He pinched the bridge of his nose trying to digest everything Haruhi just told him.

"So what are you going to do now?" he asked settling his glasses back into place.

"I don't know," she said miserably. "Kaoru wants to become a couple but…"

"But?"

"But is that fair to Hikaru?" she asked the question that's been plaguing her.

"All is fair in love and war, Haruhi," he said in his cool no nonsense voice.

"That's just it. I don't want them at war. I don't want them to fight. They're brothers."

"They have to make their own choices," Kyoya said.

"They're twins," she stressed.

"They're grown men," Kyoya countered.

"Identical twins," she stated as if he didn't know.

"They are two completely different people. You were the one who showed the rest of us just how different they were. You were the first one to figure it out no matter how contradictory they tried to be. They are two different people and as such they have minds of their own."

"What a mess," she said swiping her hand down her face. "What am I going to do, Kyoya?"

She only dropped the Senpai when she let her guard down completely. He would never admit it out loud but it warmed him inside to know she let her guard down fully around him. Most people doubled their defenses around him but not Haruhi. He always wondered why. He stared at the beautiful girl who literally stumbled into their lives more than three years ago.

"Why do you always come to me when you're troubled?" he asked his curiosity burning.

"I didn't think it bothered you," she snapped defensively and stood up.

She had taken a few steps away before he realized it. He jumped up, grabbed her wrist, and pulled her back into the chair.

"I don't believe it," Tarumi's friend said. "He not only didn't tell her to leave him alone, he stopped her from leaving."

"I told you," Tarumi said. He wished he knew what they were talking about. What had made Ohtori shout out not once but twice and cause her to glare at him right back?

"It doesn't bother me in the least, Haruhi," he said. "I am merely curious."

She waved her hand absently in front of her. "Because I tend to miss things where as you miss nothing."

He slid his hand from her wrist to her own hand and squeezed it gently. "Rest assured, Haruhi, you never miss what's important."

"I'm not sure about that," she whispered. "I didn't see Kaoru's kiss coming, or his desire, or his declaration of love."

"No. I can't say I did either," he said with a frown.

"Uh-oh," she said with a smirk. "Are your mad skills slipping, Senpai?"

"Hardly," he said annoyed by this observation. This earned him a small laugh from the petite brunette beside him.

"We're just not together all the time like we used to be. I can't analyze everyone's actions and reactions like I used to," he said defensively.

Her beautiful smile fell at his words.

"I know," she whispered sadly. "Do you ever miss it?'

He stared at her. "What? The Host Club?"

"All of it," she said waving her hand in front go her again. "High school, the Host Club, the time we used to spend together, the frequent outings as annoying as those could be."

"Yes," he admitted quietly. "Yes, I miss it. That's why I go along with Tamaki's insistence of our continued get togethers. Do you miss it?" he asked knowing half the time she viewed the Host Club and it's members as a nuisance in her life.

"I do. I even miss the insanity of it all. Crazy huh?"

"Not at all. I know what you mean."

"I can understand why Tamaki-Senpai never wanted anything to change," she whispered in that same sad voice.

"Change is inevitable, Haruhi. Our choices determine if the change is good or not."

She looked at him.

"Which brings us full circle," he said. "You want my opinion? Kaoru is good for you. I've always thought so."

"But…Hikaru…"

"Is not," he said firmly. "He had his chance."

Her cell phone rang interrupting their conversation.

"Gah! It's Mrs. Hitachiin," she said a look of horror on her face.

"So, are you going to answer it?"

"I guess," she said answering her phone.

Kyoya watched her carefully while she took her call. He frowned as he watched her pale slightly.

"She wants me to come over for tea," she said nervously as she hung up. "What am I going to do Kyoya? She probably wants to call me a slut and tell me to stay away from her sons."

"She will do nothing of the sort," Kyoya said without hesitation. "She adores you too much and you know it."

"Pfft. Will that adoration continue after finding out I've broken up with one twin and am now sleeping with another?"

"Yes," he said firmly once again. "She loves you, Haruhi."

That earned him her natural smile that captured all the hearts in the host club.

"Thank you, Kyoya," she said before leaning over and placing a soft kiss on his cheek.

That gentle kiss took him by surprise. So much so that she was several steps away before he noticed she was leaving.

"Haruhi," he called. She turned. "Call me if you need to, I don't care the time."

She smiled at him. "Thanks, Senpai."

Kyoya watched her leave. He went to get back to his studies when he noticed all eyes were upon him. He didn't even bother to glare. He supposed it was shocking to see him calmly accept a kiss by the girl who had bothered him during his studies. He smirked. Haruhi was not one for public displays of affection any more than he was. He guessed they did make quite a sight. _Oh, well._

Tarumi narrowed his eyes as he watched her leave.

"She kissed Ohtori," his friend said with awe. "She kissed him and he allowed it."

"I know," Tarumi said. "I told you they were close." He wondered if he even stood a chance.

Haruhi took a deep breath before knocking on the huge wooden doors to the Hitachiin Mansion.

"Oh, Miss Haruhi, come this way please," a butler said upon opening the door.

"Thank you," she said following the man into the sitting room.

A knot began to form in her stomach at the thought of facing their mother. She loved the crazy, overwhelming woman to death. What if she never wanted her to show her face around here again? Her stomach flipped making her very grateful she had not eaten anything for lunch.

"Oh, Haruhi, dear, come in, come in. I have tea all set up for us. I have some finger foods and fruit here as well. Come join me, love."

All of Haruhi's fears were erased the moment Mrs. Hitachiin began to speak. She really did love this woman flights of fancy and all.

"Thank you," she said and put a few strawberries on her plate.

"How are you dear?"

The gentle way she acted when she should have been shunning her brought tears to Haruhi's eyes. Without her knowing it was going to happen she burst into tears.

Mrs. Hitachiin gathered her in her arms and held her tightly.

"Oh, my dear little Haruhi. All of you are hurting right now. It pains me to see. What can I do to help dear?"

Haruhi was so touched by her gentleness, by her willing to help she couldn't even form a coherent thought let alone words. When she finally composed herself down to sobs she said, "I-I- don't Know. I don't know what to do?"

Mrs. Hitachiin caught her sons standing in the doorway and nodded her head toward them.

When Mrs. Hitachiin pulled away she saw Hikaru and Kaoru on their knees in front of her.

"Haruhi," Hikaru cried with tears in his eyes. "I-I miss you so much. I can't stand it any more. Please, please don't push us away."

"Yeah, Haruhi, I can't stand it either," Kaoru said crying even harder than Hikaru was. "I miss you. I just miss you."

"I miss you guys too. I just don't know what to do to get us back to where we were. You know, when everything was okay between us."

"I think we've gone too far to go back to where we were. We need to figure out how to move foreword," Kaoru said.

"I don't know how. Can't we just go back to how it used to be. You know, like back in the host club days?" she pleaded.

"No," Hikaru said. "We annoyed you too much back then. You avoided us too much."

"Guys…." she started sadly.

"NO!" Hikaru shouted. "No, no, no. Don't do it, Haruhi. Don't cut that thread between us. I won't let you. I couldn't stand it."

"Thread? What thread?" Haruhi asked tilting her head and looking at Hikaru.

"You know what I'm talking about. You feel it too. I know you do," he said to her.

"Hikaru?"

"Since before we were born Kaoru and I had this thread linking us together. _Holding _us together. It's an invisible thread that connects the two of us together. When we played the which one is Hikaru game and you knew us apart without fail, that thread reached out and connected your heart to ours too. We felt it, both of us. We felt it, Haruhi, that invisible thread that binds the three of us together. Please, Haruhi, don't sever it. If you distance yourself from us, it will break. I can't live like that. I can't. Kaoru can't either. Please, Haruhi, please tell me you feel it too."

"I do, I do," she cried reaching out and taking both of them in her arms. "I do feel it. I do feel bound to you, both of you. I don't want to lose that either," she cried.

They wrapped their arms around her. All of them were crying.

"I am so in love with you, Haruhi Fujioka," Kaoru said leaning forward to kiss her.

Before she had a chance to lean in and return his kiss she felt Hikaru stiffen in her arms. She turned her head to look at him. She could see him struggling with his feelings. Struggling to tamp down his jealousy and not look so _pained._

"I'm…I'm sorry. I think it's best if we're all just friends. Let's just try to work on going back to being friends." She jumped up causing both men to fall back on their bottoms. They looked up at her in shock. Mrs. Hitachiin looked shocked as she turned and bowed to her before she ran out of the house.

"She..she's running again," Kaoru said in disbelief.

"Well, go after her, Kaoru," Hikaru shouted trying to push his brother off the floor.

Kaoru didn't budge.

"No," he said sadly.

"What? Why not? She is yours. You have claimed her as yours. You say you love her. Now prove it and go after her!" Hikaru said.

"I do love her and that's why I won't go after her. I can't force her feelings. I _won't _force her feelings," Kaoru said.

"Then I'll go after her and talk some sense into her," Hikaru said standing.

"No," Kaoru said. "I don't want her because you talked her into it. She either loves me enough on her own or she doesn't. I don't want her love any other way."

Kaoru got up and headed toward the stairs.

"Give her time, Kaoru, dear," their mother said.

He went to his room holding in the majority of his tears until he hit his bed. Once he did he didn't hold back.

Haruhi threw herself on her bed and cried like she never cried before. What the hell was going on? It was like once the tears started weeks ago she forgot how to stop. She wanted nothing more than to pull Kaoru in her arms and kiss him. Her heart yearned for him, but Hikaru had stiffened in her arms. He was so sad talking about that thread that bound them all together. He begged her not to leave either one of them. How could she kiss Kaoru right in front of him? Would Hikaru see that as her choosing to be bound to Kaoru and rejecting her bond with him? She just didn't know. She just wanted to turn back time and go back to being their best friends.

"Help him, Hikaru," their mother whispered to him. "If you love your brother, help him."

Hikaru went up to Kaoru's room and stopped outside the door. Hearing his brother cry was hurting his heart. What would have happened if Kaoru waited for Haruhi's answer to his confession? Who would she have chosen? Would she be with Kaoru all this time? He knew it was his fault that Haruhi ran this time. He knew he stiffened up and couldn't keep the pain from showing on his face. That is what stopped Haruhi in her tracks. He took a deep breath pushed down his own pain and entered Kaoru's room.

"Kaoru," Hikaru said as he laid down on the bed and gathered his brother in his arms. Kaoru held onto his brother tightly his hands fisted in his shirt as he cried.

"I love her, Hikaru. I'm sorry but I really, really love her."

"I know. You have nothing to be sorry for," Hikaru said.

"You wouldn't be saying that if you knew how I really felt," Kaoru said sadly.

"What are you talking about? I know how you feel. I love her too," Hikaru said.

"No, you don't really know how I feel" Kaoru said and took a deep breath. He had to tell his brother the truth. "Hikaru, I…I…please don't hate me but I love Haruhi even more than I love you."

Hikaru looked shocked but oddly he was not as hurt as Kaoru feared he'd be. He knew, he knew when he looked at Kaoru's face how much he loved her.

"I'll help you, Kaoru. I'll help you show Haruhi how much you love her."

"You…you're not mad?" Kaoru asked hope in his voice.

"I'm not mad. I know you love her. I think it's my turn to step aside."

Kaoru broke at Hikaru's words. "I…I love you, Hika," Kaoru said as he continued to hold onto his brother.

"I love you too, Kaoru. Nothing will ever change that. Just promise me you won't get mad when I hold onto her too. When she is within arms length I can breath."

"I know. I feel the same way. I won't get mad. You never did when I still hugged her."

"Of course not," Hikaru said. "You're my brother. We are all bound together. That won't change no matter which one of us she loves more."

Kaoru's tears renewed but this time they were partial tears of relief. Hikaru understood him, he wasn't mad at him, and he was going to help him. That was more than he ever hoped for. Now the only thing he could do was hope that Haruhi loved him enough.

A/N:(Again). Well, What do you think? Please let me know. You are all aware I love to hear from you. FYI, Mori won the voting's the final votes tally is, Mori-6/Hikaru-5/Kyoya-1. I know this is going to disappoint Hikaru fans who wanted his story next but if I ignore the voting then I never should have asked in the first place. There are two more chapters left to this story. I plan on posting the next chapter of the story and the first chapter of Mori's story at the same time. Even if you are a Hikaru fan I hope you follow me over to my next story. You guys have been amazing and keep me inspired. Please let me know what you think of this chapter by dropping me a review. Arigato!


	14. Don't be afraid

**Disclaimer: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club. It****'****s a sad fact but true!**

A/N: I am sad to say the end is near. I have truly enjoyed this story and I have enjoyed the reviews you guys have written even more. I passed 80 reviews which I totally didn't expect. Now I wish the story was longer so I could reach for a 100! Thank you, you guys are the best! I hope you enjoy this Chapter. Here we go!

Four Days.

Four miserable days had passed since Mrs. Hitachiin called her for that little talk that solved nothing.

She felt terrible with each passing day. Her nerves were on edge. The other hosts all looked at her with concern which of course led them to be over protective and constantly around. They all knew something was wrong but only Kyoya knew her secret. She was never very good at hiding her feelings and since the others were so hyperaware of her they always knew when something was wrong.

They each tried in their own way to get her to reveal something, but she remained quiet, sharing nothing. She didn't need everyone knowing her business.

The worst was Tamaki. He definitely knew something was going on and because he couldn't stand feeling left out he badgered her the most. He followed her around appearing before class, after class, sometimes even _in _her class.

He was being so annoying, so relentless, just so…so…Tamaki. She sighed. He constantly bombarded her with that whiney voice and those puppy dog eyes asking her what was wrong over and over. He was shredding her nerves. Shattering her patience. Next time she saw him she feared she would punch the young man in his beautiful face.

She sighed once more exhaling a deep, calming breath. Even more draining then Tamaki was her time spent with the twins. She loved them. She missed them. Especially Kaoru. The three of them were fighting for normalcy but the contact between them seemed so forced she wanted to scream.

Gone was the natural way they clung to her at every turn. In its place was hesitancy, nervousness, and awkward touches that took place more because it seemed they had to rather than unconsciously doing so because they wanted to.

Whenever Hikaru approached her he did so with caution. He tensely put his arms around her hoping for normalcy but achieving only stiffness. Hikaru never held back; if he wanted to touch her, he touched her. If he wanted to smother her, he smothered her. He never cared whether she wanted it, was annoyed by it, embarrassed from it. It didn't matter.

Now he treated her like some cornered animal wanting to reach out and comfort her but afraid she'd snap at him. His fear, his doubts turned out to be way more uncomfortable then when his touch knew no boundaries.

And then there was Kaoru. While he never draped himself all over her the way Hikaru did he did enjoy a lot of contact and he was more of a nuzzler than his brother, but his actions too were robotic almost forced.

If Hikaru now approached her with caution Kaoru acted like he was sent to deactivate a bomb. It made her sad. She missed his touch. Perhaps because he had touched every part of her; so gently, so tenderly his stilted touch was even more unbearable than his brothers tentative one.

The simple truth: she missed her gentle flame.

She longed to wrap her arms around him. Whisper something soothing into his ear and bask in his tender light.

But she was as guarded as they were. She was afraid of encouraging him. Of leading him on. Of wanting more of what could only cause all of them more pain.

She pressed her back further into the cherry blossom tree she was leaning against. She just wished everything could go back to normal. Feel more natural, damn. She had been known as the natural host, so why did every action she made with the twins feel so unnaturally stiff. Wooden. Hollow. She hated it yet she didn't know how to change it.

Kaoru was approaching Haruhi, slowly, quietly. He had looked out a window and seen her leaning against one of her favorite trees. Without thought he headed outside his body taking quick strides to be beside hers even if his brain wasn't sure it was a good idea.

He stopped about twelve feet away from her and drank her in. Her eyes were closed, which was a shame since they were one of his favorite features, but her long dark lashes rested on her delicate cheek bones. Her collar bone was visible above the snug black top she wore. Low rider Hitachiin jeans hugging her slender hips. They hung on her jutting hip bones in that sexy way they always did.

Just looking at her made him hungry for her. He longed to touch her, to be touched in return. He missed the constant body contact that always existed between them through the years.

Oh sure, he still touched her but now he moved like a fool. Through all the years he's known her he touched her without thought but for the last few days his brain wouldn't shut off, wouldn't allow him to touch her without thought. If anything it over analyzed every move he went to make. Would she hate it? Feel uncomfortable? Stiffen? Reject him?

All of those insecurities caused him to hesitate which in turn caused all of his touches to feel awkward, unnatural, weird. He hated it. He wanted it to stop.

His eyes drank her in once more. His jaw tightened. He grit his teeth. The hell with it he thought determined to get passed this and go back to touching her without fear.

Since he hadn't stopped touching her completely the last few days, he was already dancing around the fire, already getting burned. He might as well dive right in and be consumed completely. At her touch he was a phoenix and he was determined to rise from the pile of ashes their relationship had become and start rebuilding.

First order of business, touch her the way he wanted to touch her and consequences be damned. If there was a fall out he would deal with it then, not before.

He took a breath to steel himself. He had choked down his nerves with her before and it had led to the best night of his life. Why was he afraid to touch her? He had made love to this woman more than once. He would stay focused on that and bury the fear of rejection.

He took a final cleansing breath before quietly making his way to her. "Haruhi," he whispered before wrapping his arms around her and rubbing his nose up and down her cheek.

She stiffened in his arms but only for a moment. After that one excruciating second she relaxed against him completely. This is how it had always been between them; no discomfort, no mechanical movements just a young man who knew no boundaries and a young woman who welcomed him despite that.

She was in his arms. He achieved it. He got back to where he always used to be. Back in the Goldilocks Zone where everything was just right. For the first time in days he took a breath that didn't hurt.

Haruhi felt herself go as stiff as a board the moment Kaoru approached her but when his arms folded around her as gently and as naturally as they used to she couldn't resist. There was nothing awkward about it so instead of over thinking it or questioning it she just went with it and melted into him.

"Kaoru," she whispered moving her face into his neck. There he was, her gentle flame. He felt so warm. He smelled sooo good. The logical side of her brain that housed all her worries was shoved into a box by the side of her brain that just wanted to _feel_. She had never been more thankful.

"Kaoru," she whispered again.

This time he felt her warm breath on his neck as she sighed his name.

Imperfections from the tree trunk bit into his back as he suddenly realized Haruhi had switched their positions.

He pulled away from her in shock hardly daring to believe she wanted to share this closeness with him. Thankfully she wasn't allowing any of the distance he had so foolishly created in his surprise. His mind whirled with questions; What did this acceptance mean? Was she willing to become a couple? Would she come to her senses at any moment and push him away?

She stared at him with her big brown eyes. He wondered what she was thinking. He _feared_ what she was thinking. Before the insecurities of the past few days could grow inside him she ran her fingers through his hair, gripped the strands tightly, and pulled his face down to hers.

Her mouth met his and she wasted no time in changing it from a gentle press of lips to a passionate kiss. As soon as her soft mouth made contact with his he felt like he had been struck by lightening. Electricity zinged through every nerve racing around inside him touching every part of him. It reached the tips of his hair, the tips of his fingers, it raced down to his toes.

Blessedly it also raced to his brain frying any and all stupid questions he was forming that would have ruined this contact between them if he voiced them. All thought was zapped from him as he was reduced to nothing more than absolute sensation.

His heart was hammering in his chest. She bit his bottom lip lightly then swiped her tongue across the spot. He gasped at the raw pleasure of it. She slipped her tongue into his mouth deepening their kiss. When he approached her the most he had hoped for was a comfortable hug now he moaned into her mouth feeling nothing but elation from this unexpected contact.

He whimpered when she denied him continued access to her heated lips but he wasn't disappointed for long. She nuzzled her adorable face into his neck. He felt her inhale against his skin as though savoring his scent. She exhaled in contentment. He felt her melt further into him.

Her soft body pressed against him. He gasped as her tongue ran slowly up the column of his throat. She nipped and nibbled and kissed every inch of his neck and the only thing he seemed capable of doing was moan and groan and pull her even closer to his body.

She slipped her hands under his shirt. Her cold fingertips feathering across his ribs. The contact made him quiver involuntarily tightening his abs.

The tightening in his jeans, while there, didn't consume his thoughts. The yearning he felt for her touch, for her closeness, overrode even his base urge to have all of her. Right now this sweet contact was enough.

She looked at him as her fingers continued their journey on his bare skin.

"Haruhi," he whispered wishing he could find the words to express just how much he loved having her in his arms.

Fear flickered across her face and she whimpered as if in agony. She pressed her mouth against his once more. She seemed desperate to silence any words he might speak that could pull them out of this bliss and back to their current reality.

She released his lips and went back to his neck. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back.

He didn't want to ruin the moment. He knew he'd be a complete idiot if he did but he didn't just want her body. He wanted her heart more and he couldn't stand her fear.

"Haruhi," he whispered. "I want us to be together. I'm tired of avoiding it. I don't want to be afraid of it. I don't want you to be afraid of it either."

He could have kicked himself as all of her tender movements ceased. Her fingers curled digging into the flesh at his sides. He didn't want this time with her to end, but he had no choice. He had to speak up. The feelings in his heart were not fleeting and they were way more important than satisfying the part of him that lived south of his custom made belt.

Once again he had no idea what she was thinking. She didn't continue to explore him with either her mouth or her hands but she didn't pull away from him either. For that he was grateful.

She didn't move. She didn't speak. She just kept her grip into his sides and rested her forehead against his chest. He was unsure if he should continue. If he should restate his feelings.

She leaned up and pressed her moth to his neck once more. Was she avoiding his words? Should he stop her? He should but her lips felt so soft, so sweet against his heated skin. He would stop her after a few more minutes of this indulgence.

He moaned as he leaned his head back in pleasure once more.

A loud gasp was all it took to interrupt and separate them. Haruhi pulled away. She turned in the direction of the gasp just as he did. Their eyes landed on the source of the sound.

Hikaru.

He looked…shocked.

Haruhi pulled her hands out from under his shirt and looked at her watch.

"Uh…um…sorry but I've got to go," she whispered picking up her bag from the ground.

"Haruhi, wait," Kaoru said not wanting her to leave.

"Sorry, I have that study group with Mori-Senpai," she said already walking away.

"Hey, wait," Kaoru called after her again. "Can we get together afterwards?"

"Sorry, I've got to go," she softly said.

She was disappearing from sight before he realized she avoided his question completely. He sighed and leaned against the tree.

Hikaru hadn't meant to gasp loudly enough to interrupt them. He was just so surprised by the sheer pleasure on Kaoru's face as Haruhi was kissing his neck.

Yeah, he was jealous. He could admit that but it didn't consume him like he thought it would have. His jealousy stemmed more from disappointment that he never inspired such actions from Haruhi rather than from a true envy toward his brother. More than jealousy though he felt relief.

Relief that she was at least connecting with one of them again. It was a start to getting things back to the way they used to be without all the awkward weirdness.

"Damn," Kaoru muttered pulling Hikaru from his thoughts.

"I'm sorry, Kaoru. I never meant to interrupt and I didn't mean to look so shocked you two just looked so natural together and it's been so long since things have been that way among the three of us. I just…she always misunderstands my reactions. Let me go explain it to her."

"No," Kaoru said grabbing his arm. "I don't want to push her. Everything is just so…fragile right now. I don't want to rock the boat."

"All right," Hikaru said. "So, what do you think it means? Are things settled between you?"

"I don't know," Kaoru said sadly. "I just don't know."

Haruhi tried to calm her racing heart as she walked toward the library. She put her cold hands to her flaming cheeks hoping they would not look as flushed as they felt. What did she just do? She couldn't believe herself she was just thinking about not leading him on but when he appeared before her she leeched onto him. She had once called him an octopus man but she must be an octopus woman because the second his arms went around her she attached herself to him like she had suckers and tentacles.

She sighed. She just couldn't help herself. She could stay detached, distanced, when their interactions were so forced, but Kaoru's hug just now was anything but forced. It was warm, inviting, and he smelled so good. She had felt his rapid heart beating against her. It accelerated her own pulse and stripped her defenses.

It felt wonderful to be in his arms. It felt so good just to be near him but guilt was beginning to nibble away at the lingering pleasure. Hikaru's gasp had broken the enchantment she seemed to be under. The shock on his face opened the box her logical mind had been trapped in and all her former worries came pouring out of it.

Ugh! She was beginning to get a headache. She wondered if banging her head on the wall a few thousand times might help stop her thoughts but she simply didn't have the time. She had to get to the library.

She stopped walking. She had to compose herself before she saw Mori-Senpai. He was already aware that something was wrong. As a National Kendo Champion he was trained to read body language. To study every thought every move. If she didn't collect herself right now Mori would also know what she had already confided to Kyoya.

Once she told Kyoya half the former hosts already knew. She had no desire to share that information with the other half.

She swiped her hand down her face, took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly as she counted to ten. She tried to picture Kyoya's mask of indifference and schooled her features to match what she saw in her minds eye.

She took one more steadying breath before entering the room and facing Mori-Senpai. It wasn't hard to spot her study group. They were the only people on the bottom floor of the library.

Mori-Senpai's eyebrows gathered together just a tiny bit but the slight movement told her that he was studying her. She forced herself to reman calm to keep the indifference on her face.

"Haru-chan," she heard just before she was knocked flat on her back by the excited hug she had not braced herself for.

She looked up, chocolate brown met with caramel, as she looked at the face of her senpai.

"Hunny-Senpai," she cried unable to resist returning the sweet smile that graced the adorable face only inches above her own.

"Mitsukuni," Mori-Senpai reprimanded as he hauled his cousin off of her by the back of his collar.

Because of Hunny's tight hold on her she was lifted off the ground as well.

"I'm sorry, Haru-Chan," Hunny-Senpai said as he held her tighter. "It's just been so long since I've seen you. I miss you."

"What are you talking about, Hunny-Senpai?" She asked as she pried him off of her. "You just saw me yesterday."

"I know," he whined. "Its been a whole day. You're my favorite friend, Haru-chan, I want to see you all the time."

She giggled at his words. At least his hyper antics put her face in a more relaxed state.

"What are you doing here?" she asked curiously knowing he never joined their study group since it was for pre law.

"I have a paper to research," he said with a pout. "I figured since both you and Takashi were too busy with your group to spend any time with me I would start my research."

She smiled at him. She gave her greetings to the rest of the group before they discussed their next assignment.

They had just gotten into their own research when Hunny distracted them.

"Haru-chan?"

"Yes, Senpai?"

"I'm still thinking about that delicious dinner you cooked for me and Takashi. What do I have to do to get another invitation?"

"Mitsukuni," Mori-Senpai reprimanded again.

"I know I'm supposed to be quiet but you want to know Haru-chan's answer too. I know you do."

"Study," Mori said but Hunny caught the curious look in his eyes. Hunny-Senpai looked at her his own eyes pleading. She laughed softly.

"Hunny-Senpai, you don't have to do anything. You're welcome anytime you want. Just let me know when you're available. You too, Senpai," she said looking over at Mori.

"Ah," Mori-Senpai said in thanks. The corners of his mouth lifted slightly before a serious look crossed his face once more. "Study."

Haruhi and Hunny-Senpai giggled as they caught each others eye. All laughter stopped at Mori-Senpia's glare. They both settled into serious study mode.

A half an hour of silent work got finished before the peace in the library was broken.

"Haruhi." She turned at the uncharacteristically distressed voice.

"Kyoya-Senpai?" she questioned troubled that he almost looked as distressed as he sounded. Almost.

"Haruhi, I was exhausted and he was so relentless…" he trailed off pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"she asked.

"I am so sorry, Haruhi, please forgive me," he said in his cool voice but she could hear the underlying tension.

"Forgive you for what?" she asked confused.

"Ha-ruuu-hiiiii!"

"For that," Kyoya said pointing to an obviously distressed looking Tamaki.

"Tamaki-Senpai?" She didn't understand what was going on. What were they doing here?

"Ha-ru-hiiii, how could you?" he whined as he towered over her.

"Huh?"

"How could you give your first time to Kaoru?"

"Ta-Tamaki, how…" she barely whispered.

"How could you do it, Haruhi? Why would you do it?"

"Senpai," she said a little harshly as she noted the curious faces of the two males in her and Mori-Senpai's group.

"A woman's first time is precious. Special. Oh, how could you give it to him?" he continued dramatically and not so quietly. "Oh, no, unless you've already given your first time to Hikaru," he said voicing the new thought that dawned on him.

"Senpai," she snapped a little harsher than before.

"Haruhi, you know that I am much more skilled in the art of love," he said placing one hand on her shoulder the other on his heart. "If you were ready for your first time you should have come to me."

"Senpai," she practically growled. She glanced at Hunny and Mori-Senpai wondering why they weren't helping her to silence this idiot but they looked too shocked by his words to intervene.

"You know that I would have been more than willing, more than honored to have shared such a loving moment with you. Instead you gave yourself to one or both of those shady twins!" He was nearly hysterical as he moved his hand from her shoulder to grip her upper arm.

"TAMAKI, SHUT UP," she roared pinching his hand and _finally _stopping his obnoxious speech. "I am a grown woman and I can sleep with whoever I want to. It is none of your concern."

Her face flamed with heat as she noticed the looks she was getting from the members of their study group to say nothing of the looks she was getting from the former hosts at her unladylike outburst.

How dare Tamaki make such an announcement in front of other people. How did he even… she stopped and faced the culprit.

"AND YOU!" she seethed pointing at Kyoya. "I will _never_ tell you anything in confidence ever again."

Kyoya visibly paled, but his glasses hid whatever emotion crossed his eyes, if any, and only the other former hosts knew him while enough to see him gulp.

"Haruhi, please, if you will just…" he started calmly.

"I'll listen to you in about five years _if _I've forgiven you by then."

Kyoya's lips compressed holding back the pleading words that tried to burst forth. Ohtori's did not beg. In truth he would to Haruhi, just not in public. He did have a reputation to consider.

"Haruhi, just explain to me…" Tamaki started but was instantly cut off.

"I said shut up, Tamaki, and I meant it. Ugh! Why can't you guys ever mind your own business?"

Without waiting for a reply she gathered her books, threw them in her bag, and marched out without a second glance.

"But…but….Haruhi, wait…"

Tamaki's words were abruptly stopped by Kyoya's hand clamping over his lips. He had never seen Kyoya look so furious.

"Tamaki, if one more word slips from that outrageously big mouth of yours I will cut your tongue out and please don't forget I have the instruments to do it," Kyoya threatened his voice dangerously low.

Tamaki backed away from the Shadow King covering his mouth with his own hands. Because Tamaki was Tamaki he couldn't leave well enough alone for long.

"Forgive me, Kyoya," Tamaki whispered.

Kyoya stepped toward him menacingly causing Tamaki to let out a frightened squeak.

"I won't forgive _you _until Haruhi forgives _me,__"_ Kyoya said harshly. He pushed his glasses up, straightened his tie, and turned on his heel. He gathered what dignity he still held onto and walked out.

Tamaki staggered into the seat Haruhi had been sitting in.

"Kyoya is not going to forgive me," he said in shock. "Oh, no, Haruhi is _never _going to forgive me."

"Sorry, Tama-chan, but it's what you deserve," Hunny-Senpai said seriously. "Right, Takashi? Takashi?" Hunny said looking around for his cousin.

"Um…excuse me, Haninozuka-Senpai," the other girl in the group said. "Morinozuka-Senpai ran after Fujioka-san."

"Haruhi is never going to forgive me," Tamaki repeated in despair.

"You should have never repeated something she told Kyo-chan in confidence and you certainly should have never said it so publicly if you ever do that again I'll be real mad at you, Tama-chan."

"Not you too, Hunny-Senpai," he pleaded. "I've already lost Haruhi and Kyoya. I couldn't bare it if you abandon me too."

Hunny sighed exasperated by the idiot in front of him. As angry as he was at him the defeated look on his face pulled at Hunny's heart.

"Haru-chan doesn't hold grudges, Tama-chan. If she did she would have stopped talking to us years ago."

"So you think she'll forgive me? I didn't mean to…I was just so… I love her, Hunny-Senpai. I've loved her since high school. I know she only sees me as a friend but my feelings have never changed."

"I know, Tama-chan, we all love her."

"What if she doesn't forgive me? How will I live without her?"

"She's with Takashi. He'll calm her down, you'll see."

"Yes, yes, you're right. Thank you, Hunny-Senpai. I guess I'll be going now."

"Tama-chan," he called as the younger man started to leave.

"Hmmm?"

"Don't start calling Haru-chan and Kyo-chan. If you want them to forgive you don't bury them in unwanted phone calls and texts right now."

Tamaki's face fell as his plan was thrown right out the window. His hand itched to pull out his phone and start begging for forgiveness but he had been foolish enough this afternoon. He should heed Hunny-Senpai's words no matter how hard it might be.

Hunny looked to his right surprised by the three faces that were staring at him in shock. He had been so mad at Tama-chan that he forgot about their audience. Poor Haru-chan, she would find it hard to face this group again. He frowned.

"Even though Tama-chan spoke so publicly he said some things that should have remained private among our circle of friends. The three of you are the only ones who heard this besides us. If any rumors get started about Haru-chan I will know who started them and I will not be happy about it. I will not let anyone say anything to hurt Haru-chan, do you understand what I am saying?" Hunny said in his dangerous dark Hunny voice.

The three in the group looked at him in fear. They each shook their heads and promised they wouldn't say a word.

"It seems like you understand, okay, bye," Hunny said gathering his things to head home. He was dying to know what was happening between Takashi and Haru-chan but he knew better than to disturb Takashi when he was helping her. His cousin would call him once he made things right. For now Hunny would just have to go home and wait patiently for his call.

The girl in the study group stared after the smallest man of the close circle of friends. She did not take his threat lightly. She could tell by the fear on the faces of the other two that they didn't either. It was no secret that Haninozuka-Senpai was a deadly martial artist and if he was against you his cousin Morinozuka-Senpai would be too. No one was that foolish unless they wanted to be hurt.

She envied Fujioka-San. What was it about her that commanded such devotion from the six richest most handsome men at Ouran University? She always liked Fujioka-San but she must really be something special if the handsome Suoh-Senpai loved her. Haninozuka-Senpai said they all loved her. She even inspired Ohtori-Senpai to ask for her forgiveness. Fujioka-San was strange though, instead of flaunting her relationship with them she seemed angered by the attention most of the time. If she were as treasured by that group of men as Fujioka-San was she would announce it too all of Japan and milk it for all it was worth. Little did she know it was because Haruhi would never do either of those things that they desired her company so desperately.

Haruhi was more furious than she ever remembered being in her life. She cold not recall a time when she was more humiliated than she was at the moment Tamaki announced her loss of virginity to the whole library. The only thing she could be grateful for was that the normally busy room had been virtually empty.

Stupid Tamaki. She knew he was an idiot. She's known it since she's met him but honestly that man took his stupidity to all new heights today. She was so mad she couldn't fathom ever forgiving him. And Kyoya, she was furious with him too. No, that wasn't quite right. She felt different toward Kyoya. She felt…disappointed. She trusted him with her life. She would have never believed he'd betray her trust. Well, she'd never trust him again that was for sure.

Haruhi was startled out of her thoughts when a hand grabbed her own and jerked her to a stop in the hallway.

"Mori-Senpai," she said in shock as he changed her direction and began walking her toward a different exit.

He said nothing as he continued to walk still holding her hand.

"Senpai, what are you doing?" she asked trying to dig her heels in and halt his movements it was no use he was too strong he continued walking as she just slid along the marble floors behind him.

"Senpai, stop," she said grabbing onto a doorway. It barely slowed his movements down. The only thing it really accomplished was straining her shoulders as she felt them being pulled from her arms.

"No," he said prying her fingers off the doorjamb with ease.

"I want to go home," she said still trying to pull out of his strong hold.

"No," he said again tugging her closer to him.

"Please, I'm humiliated enough. Just leave me alone and let me go home."

"No. Come with me," he said.

"I want to be alone," she whispered.

"Sorry," he said and picked her up and tossed her over his left shoulder.

"Mori-Senpai put me down," she said pushing against his back.

He said nothing. He simply tightened his hold on her upper thighs and kept walking as she hit him on the back trying to persuade him to release her.

She stopped struggling as she noticed how much attention they were receiving. She grit her teeth and fumed as she dangled down his back.

Before she knew it she was dumped in his lap in a limo before being carried into his house once they arrived. He didn't let go of her until he put her on her feet inside a nearly empty room.

The room was beautiful with small Bonzae trees, running water fountains, and tabletop sized zen gardens with handheld rakes to move the sand around.

"Sit," Mori said watching her carefully.

"Where are we?" she asked looking around still standing.

"Meditation room," he answered.

"I hate to disappoint you, Senpai, but I'm not much of a meditator so I'll just be going now."

"Sit," he ordered as he blocked the door.

"Fine," she said and plopped down to the floor.

Mori-Senpai went to a small desk in the far corner of the room and pulled out a notebook. He wrote something in it then handed it to her.

"What's this?" she asked eyeing the book in his hand.

He continued to hold it out to her. She took the open book and saw his neat handwriting at the top of each page. On the left side it said, 'Reasons I love Hikaru' on the right side it said 'Reasons I love Kaoru' she looked up at him.

"Be honest," he said and walked out the door.

She sat cross legged on the floor growing angrier by the minute. She knew Mori meant well but she needed them to stay out of her business unless she asked. She would not do this just because he was forcing her. Fifteen minutes passed then the door slid open. Mori-Senpai peeked from his spot on the floor. He frowned when he noticed the notebook empty on the floor in front of her.

"Write. Be honest," he said and slid the door shut before she glared at him.

As much as she didn't want to give in to Mori's demands she had a feeling he wasn't going to let her leave until she did.

She sighed, picked up the notebook, and starting thinking. Then she remembered he said to be honest.

Honest.

If she were to be honest she needed to write from the heart not the head. She decided to write without thought and see what she came up with.

Reasons I love Hikaru:

he's funny

he's a great friend

he's mischievous

he's selfishly honest

he's smart

he's creative

he's wild

he's reckless

he tells you when he's mad

Reasons I love Kaoru

he's smart

he's honest

he's creative

he's fun

he's gentle

he's always there

he listens without judgment

he loves to read

he loves quiet activities

his smile

he smells good

he's so warm

he makes my heart beat fast

I see his soul in his eyes

I feel safe with him

I feel cherished

he makes me dream

he makes me want more

he's my gentle flame

She had no sooner put the pen down when the door slid open. She didn't even have time to read over her list when Mori took the notebook from her.

"Hey," she said embarrassed he'd read her most inner thoughts.

"Do you know what I see?" he asked after reading both pages.

"What?"

"On Hikaru's page you wrote only what you _think_ of him. On Kaoru's page you wrote how he makes you _feel._"

She looked at him as he lowered himself to the floor in front of her.

"Haruhi, are you in love with Kaoru?" he asked her gently.

"Yes," she whispered as she admit it out loud. She felt tears gather in her eyes. "But I don't want to hurt Hikaru. I don't want him mad at Kaoru."

"True love is not gifted to everyone. If you find the one you love and are allowed to be with them nothing should stop you from embracing that person and holding on tight," he said.

It was the most he had ever said to her at one time though she did know he was willing to talk when it was important.

"You only have one life to live so live it the way you will be most happy. It's your choice, Haruhi, do you wish to love life or just live it?"

His words caused her tears to fall.

"I want to love it. I want to live it with Kaoru," she said as she continued to cry.

Mori held her close a moment before pulling away.

"Stay, I'll be back," he said placing the open notebook down in front of her.

She didn't even bother to read it. She didn't need a list to tell her how she felt. She had no idea how long she sat there crying but she lifted her head from her hands when she heard the door open.

In stepped Mori-Senpai followed by Hikaru. Before she could get over her shock at his presence Mori picked up the notebook and went to hand it to Hikaru.

"Hey, that's private," she said jumping up to take it out of Mori's hands. Mori-Senpai raised his arm putting it far out of reach.

"Nothing is private among the hosts," he said and handed the open book to Hikaru.

Under any other circumstances she would have laughed at the truth of his words but considering her heart was lying open on that notebook she didn't find it funny at all.

After reading her lists Hikaru stared at her. He didn't say a word. He just stared at her.

"Do you see what I see?" Mori-Senpai asked Hikaru.

"Yeah, I see it," he said.

"Talk," Mori-Senpai said then left them alone.

Haruhi sat back down on the floor. Hikaru sat beside her. Their shoulders touched, neither of them tensed neither moved away. It felt so normal just like it used to.

"Hikaru, I…" she started but he didn't let her finish.

"You know, I always thought I loved you more than Kaoru did. I always thought that out of the two of us I loved you first and I loved you more. I never knew that you didn't have a chance to reject Kaoru. He never told me."

"I never really understood it either. He told me he loved me than told me you were more important. It was a strange confession. I didn't know what to think," she said.

"I'm not more important to him anymore. You are," he said quietly.

"I'm sorry," she whispered not knowing what else to say.

"Don't be sorry. You know, I hate to admit this and I'll probably deny it next week but I think Kaoru loves you even more than I do."

She looked at him surprised by his admission.

"He doesn't think about himself he thinks about you. He puts you and your feelings first. I don't. I never have. I hate to admit this too but he's better for you than I am."

"Hikaru," she said softly.

"It's true. I wanted to be the one. I really wanted to be the one for you, Haruhi, but I'm not. I'm just selfish enough to want to force it but that's not fair to either of us. You and I, as much as I wanted it, we're not good for each other."

"I know," she said leaning her head on his shoulder.

"I'm like kindling and you're the match, Haruhi. You're already the air I need to breath. Do you understand what I'm saying? You are my air and my match, the two things needed to start a fire and keep it raging. I don't want to keep raging. I need water and you're not water for me. I feel _too _much for you."

"I'm sorry," she said again.

"I don't want you to be sorry I want you to do what's best for you. Haruhi, if you're not with Kaoru because you don't love him enough than that's one thing but if you're not with him because of me than that's just stupid. You may be many things but you're far from stupid. Just promise me one thing," he said.

"What?" she asked looking at him.

"Just promise that you'll always be my best friend. Promise me that if you get closer to Kaoru you don't forget about me. I may not want a raging fire but I do still need air to breath. You'll always be my air, Haruhi, I'll always need you no matter who we end up with."

"I promise. I'll always need you too, Hikaru, that will never change."

He wrapped his arms around her and held her tight. She clung to him feeling like the weight of the world was lifted from her shoulders at the natural connection between them.

"Now, this feels right doesn't it?" he asked as if thinking the same thing she was.

"Yes, it does."

They were still clinging to each other when Mori-Senpai walked in. Hikaru pulled away and looked at her.

"How do you feel about Kaoru, truth?" Hikaru asked.

"I'm in love with him, Hikaru," she answered him honestly.

"Then you need to tell him, stupid. He's at home so go tell him."

"He's not home," Mori-Senpai said interrupting their conversation. "He is in Mitsukuni's zen garden. I will take you."

"I guess I'll go home then. I love you, Haruhi."

"I love you too."

Hikaru left and Haruhi wiped the tears from her eyes.

"How bad do I look, Senpai?" she asked.

He smiled softly and put out his hand to her. He led her to a bathroom.

"You look fine, just splash some water on your face."

"Thanks, Senpai."

After freshening up in the bathroom she opened the door and was startled to see Kyoya blocking the exit.

"I am sorry, Haruhi," he said continuing to block her way. She folded her arms and prepared to listen. If Ohtori Kyoya had something to say people listened.

"I had only had two hours sleep. His calls started at five thirty this morning. He relentlessly called asking me over and over if I knew why you were upset. I don't even remember telling him. I know that is no excuse but it is the truth. I never meant to betray your trust. I swear it will never happen again. Tamaki's number is blocked from my cell between the hours of two in the morning until noon. Your trust is important to me, Haruhi, as is your friendship. I hope I can earn both of them back. Can you forgive me?"

"Of course, Senpai," she said knowing Kyoya wouldn't do anything to purposely hurt her. She saw through his mask years ago. "Mori-Senpai just reminded me that there is no privacy among the hosts. As infuriating as that thought is it's true. It seems even our sex lives aren't sacred. Though for future reference if anyone shares any details about their sex lives through our grape vine please leave me out of it. I have zero interest in knowing about any of you on that level."

"Noted," he said with a small chuckle. Little did she know they weren't interested in anyones sex life but hers and only because they all wished to either be the guy or kill the guy. The only reason Kaoru wasn't dead was because they all agreed he was good for her and he genuinely loved her.

"So, we're good?" he asked.

"Yeah, we're good."

He nodded his thanks and walked away . He turned abruptly to face her. "Good luck with Kaoru."

"Thanks, Kyoya."

He nodded again and left. She stepped outside to find Mori-Senpai waiting for her he put his hand out to her.

Hand in hand he led her down a long and winding pathway that connected the Morinozuka estate to the Haninozuka estate. At the end of the path it opened up to the most beautiful zen garden she had ever seen. It nearly took her breath away.

Her attention was broken when she spotted Kaoru sitting on a rock facing away from her. Hunny-Senpai whispered something to him then headed in their direction.

Kaoru was still not aware she was there. Hunny-Senpai approached her, gave her a big smile, then took her hand and squeezed it. Mori-Senpai squeezed her other hand. Hunny kissed her cheek while Mori ruffled her hair and they both walked away.

Kaoru was confused. He had no idea why Hunny-Senpai had called him here. He was even more confused when he told him he'd be right back and just left him alone. He heard the sound of light footsteps and felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Hunny-Senpai, I don't…" his words died in his throat as he turned. "Haruhi."

She knelt down in front of him and placed her hands on his knees.

"Kaoru, I know I'm dense and I know I'm stubborn and I know I'm foolishly independent and push people away. But I have realized a couple of things."

"Like what?" he asked fear and hope each battling for its place inside of him.

"If it's not too late I'd really like us to be together. You know, if you still want to be."

"Did you talk to Hikaru?" he asked bracing himself for her answer.

"Yes."

Sadness overwhelmed him.

"Haruhi, I want you to be with me because _you _want to be with me. Do you only want to be with me because Hikaru gave you permission and told you to?" he asked sadly.

"No. I want to be with you because Mori-Senpai helped me see that I can't be happy unless I am. Your words helped me too," she said without hesitation.

"My words?"

"Yes, you told me this afternoon that you didn't want to be afraid. Well, I don't want to be afraid either. Kaoru, it's so easy for me to stick my nose in a book and ignore everything else around me. I thought it would be so easy to keep my eye on my goal and block out everyone and everything but I don't want that. You make me want more."

His heart pounded in his chest as hope began to fill him completely.

"I don't want to be afraid. When we were at your cabin in the mountains I felt alive. I felt happy. I don't want to be afraid to feel, Kaoru. I want to feel it _all_ with you."

"Haruhi," he whispered placing a hand on her cheek.

"I always avoided strong feelings. It hurt too much since I lost my mom but that's not really living. At least not living all out. I know I'm not perfect. I know I'm blunt to the point of rudeness and I know my tongue can be sharp and cutting. I know I'm going to make mistakes. I know that I'm going to make you mad, but I also know I can make you laugh and I can fall apart in your arms. I don't want to be afraid of any of it."

"Haruhi," he tried again but she just kept talking.

"I know that the future is uncertain. I know I can't control everything. I know we'll do things we shouldn't and we may have a regret or two. I know that we may hurt each other without meaning too. We'll make mistakes and we'll fight and we'll make up and we'll fight again. I'm willing to go through all of that as long as I go through it all with you."

"Oh, God, Haruhi," he said putting both of his hands over hers.

"Mori-Senpai asked me if I wanted to love life or just live it. I want to love it, Kaoru, but I can't do that without you. Do you…do you still want to be with me?"

"Yes," he said without hesitation. "I am so in love with you, Fujioka Haruhi. The only thing I want is for you to be mine. I want nothing else. No one else. Will you be mine?"

"Yes, I will. I realized something else you know."

"What?" he asked.

"I am so in love with you too."

"Haruhi," he whispered as he pulled her into his arms. He held her tight. His heart was flipping and butterflies were dancing in his stomach. He felt himself melt into her felt her melting into him. "Do you feel it, Haruhi? There is no more me no more you there's just…"

"Us," she finished for him. "Yeah, Kaoru, I feel it."

He pulled her closer. With Haruhi in his arms he was back to that magical place he always used to be. The Goldilocks Zone were everything was just right.

A/N (again): Phew! That was a super long one! Sorry about the length I got started and it just came pouring out and I didn't want to cut the resolution in half. Well, many of you kept saying you couldn't wait to see how things got resolved. Now that the end is near what do you think? Do you like the resolution? Are you disappointed? Please, please let me know what you thought of this chapter. (Shameless plug): I just posted the first chapter to my next story. I would love it if you followed me over. Don't forget to review I can't wait to see what everyone thinks. Only one more chapter to go. Arigato!


	15. A peek into the future

**Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to Ouran High School Host Club or it****'****s characters, but I must say since this is my first fan fiction I have enjoyed borrowing them and giving them the future I would have loved to see them in. All rights belong to Bisco Hatori I just wanted to have fun using my imagination in her wonderful world.**

A/N: I was nervous to write a fan fiction, but you guys have been so wonderful I have enjoyed every minute of it! I am truly sad to see this story come to an end, I have truly enjoyed writing a deep love between Kaoru and Haruhi. I shall miss them! There are a couple lemon wedges here but you know me it won't be too much. Thank you for all of your support and encouragement. Thank you for taking this journey with me I have truly enjoyed the ride! I hope you like the ending. Enjoy!

**Epilogue:**

**15 Years Later:**

It was late afternoon when Kaoru was walking down the hallway toward his bedroom. Upon opening the door Kaoru stopped in his tracks. Haruhi was getting undressed to take a shower. He froze as he watched her. He felt that very familiar tightening in his jeans. It washed over him, that heated want that turns into a burning need every time he looks at her. His heart pounded in his chest as he neared her.

"Haruhi," he whispered as he lightly ran his fingers down her back making her shiver.

"Kaoru," she said breathlessly. "Stop, we need to be getting ready soon for Tamaki's birthday party tonight."

"We have time," he whispered his fingertips skimming her ribcage.

"Not a lot," she said leaning her back into his front.

"Finding you like this I don't need a lot of time," he said as his need for her only grew.

He slid his hands down her body. He smiled as he felt the heat coming off of her silky skin. Her need was as great as his own.

"Kaoru," she whispered.

He grabbed her slim hips and guided her toward their bed. He kissed her gently it was one of millions he has shared with her over the years. He pulled back intending on leaning her onto their bed but she gripped his hair with both hands and kissed him fiercely. Her passion fueled his own. She made quick work of his shirt.

"How can you do this to me, Kaoru?" she demanded almost accusingly.

"Do what?" he asked looking confused. "I haven't done anything to you yet."

"Is that so?" she said that same accusing tone in her voice.

"What have I done?" He looked at her and frowned.

"After all these years how can you make me want you just by standing next to me?"

Relief coursed through him at her words. He smiled sinfully.

She kissed his lips passionately. She kissed her way down his chest, down his stomach, and lowered the zipper on his jeans. She took him by surprise and made him gasp out loud as she went to work on him.

"Haruhi, stop, I want to enjoy you," he said lifting her off of her knees and tossing her gently on the bed. He crawled on top of her; barely touching her, barely kissing her. She moved beneath him driving him to new heights of arousal just as she always did.

"Kaoru, please," she whispered into his ear.

The moment he entered her he felt his heart stop. Then it flipped over and all the love he felt for her started overflowing. It spilled out and fluttered down into his stomach as if butterflies resided there. It was just like their first time, he felt that way _every time_.

He ran his hands up her back and grabbed her shoulders from behind. He kissed up her neck and looked at her.

"I am so in love with you, Hitachiin Haruhi."

"I am so in love with you too, Kaoru."

He lost all cognitive thought as she tightened her grip on him and screamed his name.

He was quick to follow.

As they laid side by side catching their breath they heard the pounding of feet in the hall followed by an exasperated voice.

"Young Masters, please. Young Masters Biggs is furious. Please stop running you know it is better to face me than to face him when he is angry."

Kaoru chuckled as the voice faded away down the hall.

"Ugh, Great! What have they done now?" Haruhi said harshly glaring at her husband.

"What?" he asked innocently. "Why are you glaring at me?"

"It is no secret that you and Hikaru taught our boys every devilish trick they know. They are horrible pranksters. Dare I even admit that my oldest boys are even worse than you and your brother ever were and that's really saying something, Kaoru."

"I know," he said smiling with pride.

"You shouldn't be smiling. Need I remind you the legal fight I had on my hands just to keep Kenichi and Toru from getting kicked out of Ouran. I probably succeeded more because Chairman Suoh intervened then I did because of my legal abilities."

"Not true, you're an amazing lawyer. You presented a great case," Kaoru said continuing to smile as he caressed her stomach.

She sighed. "I won't remain a great lawyer once my children are in jail."

"Jail!" he said laughing at her. "They don't do anything illegal."

"Arson is illegal," she said looking at him. "They set fire to the gym, Kaoru."

"Only because they put the fireworks too close to the laundry bin. They didn't set it on purpose. They learned their lesson after that."

"Only because I threatened them to within an inch of their lives. I try so hard to discipline them and you and Hikaru go behind my back and undermine everything I try to instill."

"That's not true. We don't undermine everything. I haven't said a word about you making them clean their own rooms and carrying their own bags. And Hikaru says I'm crazy for letting the boys help with the yard work but I understand you want them to have responsibility and not be too pampered. I don't undermine you," Kaoru chuckled as he pulled her closer to him.

"It's not funny, Kaoru, and don't think for one moment that I don't know who helped them pull their last prank on Biggs."

Kaoru tried to look innocent but failed miserably when he started laughing.

"They're going to give him a heart attack. Biggs is getting old, Kaoru, are you trying to kill the poor man?"

"Hmmm, well who can say?"

"Ugh, you're terrible. Get up," she said trying to push him out of the bed.

"No, I'm sorry. Don't push me away. I'm too comfortable," he said wrapping his arms around her and bringing her back to his side.

"We have to get up. We really have to start getting ready. Do you know how long it's going to take me to round up the troops and get them to put on their tuxes? And I still have to reprimand them for whatever it is they just did to Biggs. Ugh, I don't even want to know," she said sitting up.

"I'll deal with them," he said.

She looked at him skeptically knowing he was a lot more lenient on them then she was, but it was good for them to see their parents as equal disciplinarians.

He pulled her back down.

"You don't have to go yet."

"Yes, I do now get off," she said pushing him away playfully and standing up.

He pouted when she left his side. She sighed. _God, he was sexy._ He knew what that pout did to her.

"You are so annoying," she said leaning over him. "It's a good thing I love you."

She whispered those words just before she kissed him deeply.

"It's a _great_ thing you love me," he said breathlessly.

Haruhi got two steps from the bed before he spoke.

"Wait, you're going to walk away after kissing me like that," he said showing her he was ready to go again.

"Sorry," she said sweetly. "I have a shower to take and you have boys to discipline."

"Haruhi," he whined reaching for her but she was too quick.

"And you call me a devil," he muttered as he stood up and pulled his jeans back on.

Haruhi stepped under the spray of the hot water. The rings on her left hand caught her eye as she reached for the shampoo bottle. She smiled remembering Kaoru's very public proposal.

-**Flashback:**

The former Host Club was meeting for their monthly get together at an exclusive restaurant. After dining they were sitting around sharing stories while they waited for tea and dessert. Suddenly Kaoru stood up then got down on one knee before her holding a small velvet box. All chatter and motion in the restaurant stopped as every eye in the place watched them intently.

"K-kaoru, what…what are you doing?" she stuttered shaken by what he was about to do and that everyone was watching while he was about to do it.

"Haruhi," he said clearly looking more serious than she had ever seen him. "I know that you don't give a damn about all the money that I have and I know that you don't care about all of the clothes I can design for you that carry my name, and I know that you care even less about the prestige my name can give you. I will gladly hand you all that I have even though I know none of it is important to you. I know you well. I know that I only have one thing that is important to you…my heart. But I can't even offer to give that to you tonight because it's been yours for years now. I know that none of my material worth will persuade you to remain by my side but if you marry me I swear you will spend every single day of your life also rich in love."

"Kaoru," she whispered.

"I am so in love with you, Fujioka Haruhi. Will you please do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

"Yes," she said breathlessly. "Yes, Kaoru, I will."

The whole restaurant broke out in applause and Kyoya bought drinks for everyone in the place. The first time she kissed Kaoru as his fiancé it was to the sound of numerous champagne bottles popping open.

-**End of Flashback**

Haruhi shampooed her hair as she thought about the countless times Kaoru said, "I am so in love with you, Fujioka Haruhi." Once they were married he changed it to "I am so in love with you Hitachiin Haruhi." He said it the day they were married. He said it when each of their sons were born. He said it just moments ago. Just as he said it each morning when he woke up.

Her heart beat accelerated. She always wondered how she, a person with very little interest in romance, very little patience for lovey-dovey stuff, ended up with a man who loved her as much as Kaoru did. Back in the Host Club days he had been so mischievous, so clingy and invasive. There were truly times he annoyed her to no end. With Kyoya as the Shadow King and Tamaki as the Princely King, who knew that the real Prince Charming would turn out to be Kaoru.

Her heart squeezed in her chest. It actually physically hurt when she thought about how close she had come to convincing him they should just remain friends. Her heart tightened more. She would have missed a wonderful life. She couldn't imagine her life without Kaoru and their boys.

Once all the shampoo was rinsed out she turned to face the spray of water. She jumped when she felt hands gliding slowly up her spine.

"Kaoru," she scolded as she looked at him over her shoulder.

"Yes, Haruhi."

"What are you doing in here?"

"What does it feel like I'm doing?" he asked as his hands roamed up and down her petite form.

"Kaoru," she moaned. "You need to stop. We really have to start getting ready."

"You think too much," he whispered as he kissed his way up her back. "Besides, it's your fault I'm like this again. You should never have kissed me like that earlier."

"Kaoru, I'm serious."

"So am I," he said as he pressed himself against her back. "Come on, help me out. I'll never get through the party in this state."

"Kaoru," she groaned.

"Stop thinking and just get lost in me," he said as he entered her from behind.

"Mmmm," Haruhi moaned as he licked his way up her neck.

"You feel so good. Lose yourself, Haruhi," he whispered in her ear. "Lose yourself and take me with you."

And without any further convincing she did.

Kaoru walked through the down stairs hoping to find his boys. If they didn't start getting dressed soon Haruhi was going to get mad and even his daring boys knew that an angry Haruhi was a scary Haruhi.

The second he walked into the kitchen hoping to find them his face and upper body were drenched in ice cold water. It was a good thing he hadn't put his tux on yet. He wiped the water out of his eyes to find his oldest son Kenichi holding an empty bucket.

"Oh, it is _soooo_ on," Kaoru said as he grabbed the sprayer from the kitchen faucet.

"No, Dad, wait," Kenichi said dropping the bucket and shielding his face with his hands. "That was meant for Nao. Ahhhh!"

"Dad, stop," Toru said.

"Daaaaad, its cold," Nao yelled.

"It is cold," Hajime screeched.

The kitchen was filled with screaming boys as Kaoru sprayed the cold water in all directions soaking his sons as they tried to run away.

"Everyone better stop what they're doing and start getting ready, NOW!"

Every male Hitachiin froze at Haruhi's words. They all looked up at her in the doorway.

"Wow, Dad, you really out did yourself with that design. Mom looks amazing," Kenichi said.

"Yeah, Mom, you look beautiful," Toru said.

"You do look beautiful," Nao echoed.

"No wonder Uncle Tamaki calls you their princess," Hajime said.

"Flattery isn't going to get any of you anywhere," she said flatly.

"But I mean it," Kenichi said honestly.

"Me too," Toru said. "You do look beautiful."

"You do," Nao echoed once more.

"Yeah, just like a princess," Hajime said.

Kaoru had not said one word he just continued to stare at his wife in the strappy white dress he designed. His eyes landed on the white strappy heels he designed to match. His eyes inched their way up her silky legs to where her dress stopped mid thigh. The white material had a subtle iridescence to it making her almost glow. Her chocolate brown hair and eyes were a startling contrast to the sparking perfection on her body.

"Haruhi," he whispered still holding the sprayer in his hand.

She sighed at the water disaster in her kitchen.

"Really, Kaoru, you're worse then they are."

"Hey, they started it," he said defensively.

"Idiot," she muttered. "How come I don't see anyone going to get ready" she asked as she watched everyone wiping water off their faces.

"Oh, my," the older maid said as she walked into the kitchen and saw the water all over the floor, cabinets, and walls.

"I'm so sorry, Mai. I'll help you clean up," Haruhi said.

"Oh no, Lady Haruhi, you're all dressed up. I'll take care of this."

"If there was any time left before we need to go all of you would be cleaning this mess. All of you apologize right now."

The four boys said they were sorry to Mai. She fixed her gaze on Kaoru and raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry," he muttered feeling like a kid himself under Haruhi's scrutiny.

"No worries, Master Kaoru, no harm done," she said as she left to get a mop.

"Anyone who doesn't start moving in one-second will be personally dressed by Biggs," she said her voice holding that angry edge they all feared.

The kitchen became an orange blur as her boys raced out of the room at that threat.

She smiled in satisfaction.

Kaoru was leaning against the counter drying himself off.

"That includes you," she said extending her threat to her husband.

"How about you dress me instead," he said as he stalked toward her like a predator.

"Pass," she said bluntly. "You need to get ready and if I help you won't be getting dressed."

"You know me so well. The boys are right you really do look beautiful," he said staring at her. Even after all these years he is still amazed that she is his. "Thank you, Haruhi."

She looked puzzled at his softly spoken words.

"Thank you for giving me four wonderful sons. Thank you for choosing to love life instead of just living it. Thank you for choosing me to love it with you and I have, Haruhi, every single day of it."

The unconditional love shining in Kaoru's eyes made her heart melt.

"I have loved every day of it too, Kaoru. Thank you for still wanting me even after I kept pushing you away," she said once again feeling that pain in her chest as she remembered her stubbornness to remain just friends.

"I will always want you. I have been yours since the day you could tell me apart from my brother. No other woman stood a chance. They still don't," he said eyeing her up and down. He moaned in frustration. "That dress fits you like a second skin. I must have wanted to torture myself when I designed that for you."

He leaned down and kissed her unhappy that he couldn't get too close since he was wet.

She felt one hand run up her thigh as the other grabbed her wrist.

"Jeez, Kaoru, what has gotten into you. We've already gone two rounds," she said smirking at the look on his face.

"Pffft, since when is two rounds in one day ever enough for me with you around."

"But it's not just in one day it was in one hour."

"I can't help myself I have a delectable wife and I love her," he said looking at her seriously. "You move my heart as well as my body. You know that, right?"

"Yes, and as sweet as those words are they aren't going to get you any right now so go get ready."

"Tsk, you're a teasing devil woman," he said.

"I thought I was delectable," she said as she bent her leg and rubbed her knee along his thigh.

"You're both," he conceded. "Damn it, Haruhi."

She giggled and stepped away from him.

"Go get ready."

"What if I promise to be quick?" he asked hopefully.

"No now go."

"Fine," he said in defeat and started to walk away.

"Hey, Kaoru," she called.

"Yeah," he said turning back to her.

"There's always later on tonight," she whispered playing with the hem of her dress on her thighs.

"Uuuuugh!" Kaoru groaned as he ran his hands down his face. "Mean. You _are_ a teasing devil woman."

"Mmhmm, but you wouldn't want me any other way."

"True enough now stop torturing me."

She giggled again as she left to check on the boys.

She looked across the seat in the limo and stared at her four boys. At five Hajime looked adorable in his little tux. Nao did too but at seven he wouldn't want her to use that word to describe him. Her nine year old, Toru, was yanking on his collar while Kenichi her oldest at ten was fiddling with his bow tie. They all looked impeccable but how could they not with Kaoru as their father. He designed all of their clothes and they were always at the height of fashion.

"Ugh! I hate wearing a tux," Kenichi said now pulling on his vest. "Why do we have to dress up like this?"

"Because Uncle Tamaki has had a special birthday. He turned thirty-five yesterday," Haruhi said calmly.

"Pffft, Uncle Tamaki throws himself a big bash every year whether it's a special one or not and every year we have to get all dressed up for it."

"Then you would think you would be used to it," Haruhi said. "Stop complaining and be polite. A lot of important people are going to be there so all of you better be on your best behavior."

She glanced at Kaoru to back her up.

"Listen to your mother," he said. "No pranks or you can forget about the month in Bali with Uncle Hikaru and Aunt Yuiko."

The two oldest boys grinned at each other as if what they had planned was worth losing Bali for. She narrowed her eyes at them.

"Forget Bali if you do anything reckless you're working a month for me," she said pinning her two oldest with her harshest glare.

"Bahahaha, that dropped the smiles from your faces," Kaoru said looking at his wife with pride.

She sounded just like his mom. He smiled remembering that winter break his mom gave Hikaru the same punishment. That break that started it all. That was when Haruhi gave herself to him. When she admitted she was falling for him. His heart fluttered in his chest and he gasped out loud as he grabbed her left hand.

She looked at him curiously when he gasped but he just smiled and twirled her wedding ring around on her finger. He spun his own one time remembering how happy he had been when Haruhi slipped it onto his finger. It has never left his hand since that day twelve years ago. Overcome with emotion he grabbed her chin, turned her to face him, and kissed her.

"Eeewww, Dad, knock…" Kenichi started.

"It off," Toru finished.

"That's gross," they said in unison.

It still surprised her that they spoke the way Kaoru and Hikaru do even though her boys were not twins. They were very close in age and very close to each other, so even without a twin bond they found a way to read each others thoughts and finish each others sentences.

"Get a room," Kenichi said.

"Seriously, no one wants to see that," Toru said.

"This is my limo and if I want to kiss my wife in it I will," Kaoru said in a teasing voice grabbing Haruhi's chin harder and placing kisses all over her face.

"Eeww."

"Stop."

"Gross, why do you have to kiss Mom…"

"In front of us all the time…"

"No one wants to see that," they finished together.

Kaoru laughed at her scowl as he pulled away from her.

They had just pulled up in front of the Suoh mansion.

She looked at her boys again. "Last warning."

"All right, all right," Kenichi said.

"We get it," Toru followed.

She didn't miss the glance they gave to each other.

"If the threat of working with me isn't enough I could always have Uncle Mori make a special training program for you in the dojo," she said quietly.

Kaoru laughed again as his older boys paled at Haruhi's new threat. She gave him a sly smile just before the car door was opened.

They filed out and headed up the huge staircase to the front doors.

As soon as she was inside she was grabbed by Tamaki.

"Ha-ruuu-hiii," he cried as he gathered her in his arms and spun her around. He ushered her off to the side where the rest of the former hosts were waiting.

"Happy Birthday, Tamaki," she said trying to pry herself off of him and greet his wife.

"Haru-chan," Hunny said before he nearly knocked her off her feet.

She still stood at just five feet, with the heels she was five foot three. Hunny seemed to forget that he had grown to five foot six and he still barreled into her as he did when he was smaller than her.

"Mitsukuni," Mori said as he put a hand to the small of her back to keep her steady.

"Good evening, Hunny, long time no see," she said. "And thank you, Mori."

"You're welcome," he said bending down and kissing her on the temple.

"It's been too long, Haru-chan. You look amazing by the way."

"Thank you, Hunny," she said continuing to greet all of their wives.

She would be forever grateful that even though they were not thrilled about their husbands hanging all over her they never alienated them from her or treated her poorly because of it.

"Haruhi," Kyoya said giving her a quick hug before pulling back.

"Mom, we see Toji can we go over to him?" Kenichi asked once he spotted Kyoya's son.

"Sure, remember what I said," she called out to them.

"Ah, here's my two favorite people," Hikaru said putting one arm over Kaoru's shoulder and one arm around Haruhi's waist. He leaned in first to put his cheek against his brothers face then turned the other way and kissed Haruhi. She then hugged his wife, Yuiko and scooped up their daughter Rin.

"Aunt Haruhi," Rin cried wrapping her little arms around Haruhi's neck.

"Hello, my little angel you look very beautiful this evening," she said putting her niece back down.

"Thank you," the girl said twirling to show off the dress Hikaru had made for his daughter.

"Mom, can we go play?" Hajime asked. "I see Kaze and Ryu."

"Okay, have fun and stay out of trouble," she said watching her two youngest and her niece head for a table with Tamaki and Hunny's daughter and son.

After initial greetings and a dinner that didn't seem to end Tamaki announced the opening of the dance floor by sharing a dance with his wife. He was as theatrical as ever and Haruhi had to give his wife credit she still seemed as taken by it as the clients in the host club had.

Haruhi sat and talked with some of the wives, danced with each of the former hosts, as well as numerous times with her husband. About two hours into the party she saw Hunny and Mori standing by what appeared to be an ice sculpture in the form of Tamaki's head. She sighed. Of course he would have that made. She was surprised it wasn't a life sized image of his entire self.

He had really held back.

Kaoru seemed to notice who she was looking at and when the song ended he lead her toward Hunny and Mori. Within moments Kyoya had joined them followed by Hikaru and Tamaki. Hunny started laughing taking them all by surprise.

"What is so funny?" Kyoya asked him.

"We are," Hunny said confusing them all more.

"I don't get it," Haruhi said.

"Me neither," Kaoru said shrugging at her.

"No matter how many years pass, no matter what type of event we attend, no matter how many other people we have to talk to, we end up gravitating toward each other and always wind up together," Hunny said his sweet Loli smile gracing his handsome face.

A fond look passed among all of them as they looked at each other and agreed.

"Grrr!" Haruhi said interrupting their moment. "Excuse me, I'll be right back."

Kaoru watched her go with a frown on his face.

"Shit," Hikaru muttered quietly behind him. "How does she always know?"

"Hikaru," Kaoru said accusingly as the other hosts just looked at him.

"What?"

"Don't what me. You know why Haruhi just stalked off. What did you plan?"

"Just a harmless prank, it's no big deal," Hikaru said.

Kaoru groaned inwardly.

"Haru-chan's going to kill you Hika-chan," Hunny said. "You know how she feels about her boys causing trouble."

"She is going to kill you," Kaoru said. "I can't tell you how many warnings she gave them tonight."

Hikaru visibly gulped.

Kaoru looked across the room and saw his petite wife dragging his two oldest boys by their shoulders. To anyone else it would look like a casual hold but he saw the tension in her hands as they kept a steady hold on each son.

Kaoru noticed all of his friends eyes were riveted on Haruhi as she crossed the vast room with his boys followed closely by Kyoya's son Toji.

"I must say brother no one can beat your designs when you are designing for Haruhi. She looks like…like….," Hikaru said searching for the right word.

"A goddess," Mori said.

"Ethereal," Kyoya said at the same time.

Kaoru agreed with both their opinions but was leaning more toward ethereal as he watched the iridescent material he had chosen glow in the lights cast from the chandeliers. He also agreed with Hikaru. With Haruhi as a muse it brought out the best in him. It also brought out the best in her since he accentuated every curve every line of her body.

As he continued to watch her he smiled. The awkward girl who clomped around like a robot when they first met was long gone. In her place was a woman who walked confidently, freely. The light hit her body in such a way that he could see the slight jut of her hipbones. He bit back a moan as he felt himself tighten below the belt.

"Jeez, Kaoru," Hikaru said looking at his brother. "How about you wipe the drool from your mouth before your sons get any closer and see just how much of a pervert their dad really is for their mom."

"Shut up," Kaoru said wiping his mouth relieved to find Hikaru was just exaggerating and their was no embarrassing drool.

"It's true," his brother said continuing to tease. "You are a pervert. Your thoughts are so clearly in your eyes right now little brother."

"You're right," he conceded not embarrassed one bit by how Haruhi affected him.

"I'm glad to see you're not letting Hikaru's words get to you," Kyoya said. "I think we can all excuse you for being a pervert with Haruhi for a wife."

"Hey," Kaoru said surprised Kyoya admitted such a thing.

"I can," Hunny said wistfully.

"Hn," Mori agreed.

"Yeah," Tamaki said.

"Agreed," Hikaru said stopping his teasing.

"It's not fair," Hunny said suddenly.

"What's not fair?" Kyoya said.

"I don't understand it," Hunny said."All of our wives have had at least one child. My wife and Kyoya's wife only had one child and they spread out a bit and never went back. Takashi's wife had two children and got a bit wider with each one. Tamaki and Hikaru's wives had one each and kept only a little weight on but they didn't go back to exactly how they were before. How is it that Haruhi gave Kaoru _ four _sons and looks like that? She gave birth _four _times and yet her stomach is so flat I can see her hip bones. She looks more… more…"

"Sculpted," Mori finished quietly.

"Yeah," Hunny agreed. "It's not fair."

Hunny seemed to be looking at Kyoya. As a doctor he supposed Hunny felt he was the best man to answer this.

"It is one of the mysteries of the female body, Hunny. After giving birth most women tend to look a little fuller a little more matronly to fill their knew role of carrying children on their hips. That doesn't happen to all women. Some give birth and after each one their bodies become more…womanly. Genetics plays a role too. Take into account how tiny Haruhi was when we first met her. I mean we did pass her off as a boy after all. Her hips were straight and boyish then but after each birth her body became more defined into the womanly shape we see before us," Kyoya said.

"Child birth definitely agreed with her," Hunny said.

"Indeed," Kyoya said.

"Mmhmm," Mori agreed.

"Yeah," Tamaki whispered.

"Agreed," Hikaru said.

Hearing all the wistful tones from his friends he pulled his gaze away from Haruhi and looked at them.

"All right, all right, eyes off my wife," he said though he could hardly blame them especially the way he dressed her this evening.

Apologies were murmured and throats were cleared. Just in time too. Haruhi had finally made it back to them.

Kaoru frowned when he saw the annoyance that Haruhi was desperately trying to keep off her lovely face.

"What's going on?" he dared ask.

"Apparently these two want to work for me for a month," she said.

"No way," Kenichi said. "We didn't do anything."

"And besides the threat was if we did something reckless this was just going to be a…" Toru stopped once he realized what he was saying.

"Idiot," Kenichi muttered beside him.

"You're both idiots," Toji said coming up beside them. "I told you your mother would know and you know how scary she can be when she gets angry. No offense Aunt Haruhi."

Toji wrapped his arms around her in a loving embrace by way of apology for his truthful admission.

"None taken," she said with a laugh as she ran her fingers affectionately through the ten year olds hair. Her actions caused Toji to remain in her embrace and basking in her attention.

She smiled down at the raven haired boy as he looked at her with his beautiful sky blue eyes. Kyoya had married a half Japanese half American Heiress. The color contrast between Toji's eyes and hair made him quiet the handsome young man. Between being the next Ohtori heir and having those looks he was going to be beating the girls back when he got older.

"So what were you two up too, hmmm?" Tamaki asked looking down at them.

They each shrugged without answering. Tamaki looked at Haruhi who shrugged as well.

"I'm not exactly sure what the outcome would have been but I wouldn't sit in the same chair you had been sitting in Tamaki," she said.

"What? Why? Your boys love their Uncle Tamaki. They wouldn't do anything to hurt me? Would you?" he asked skeptically.

"Of course not," Kenichi said.

"Who said it would hurt?" Toru said.

"Gah!" Tamaki said tears filling his eyes. "These two are as bad as you two were. What did I ever do to deserve such torment?"

All eyes followed him as he walked into his corner of woe. _At least he stopped squatting down and planting mushrooms. _Haruhi thought that would have been unacceptable behavior by an adult male let alone the heir to a huge corporation.

"Now see what you did?" Haruhi said. "You upset Uncle Tamaki at his birthday party."

"Everything upsets…" Kenichi started.

"Uncle Tamaki," Toru finished.

Before Haruhi could remind her boys to be polite her entire group of friends burst out laughing. None harder than Kaoru and Hikaru. Hikaru actually gave them each a high five.

"There is something wrong with you two," Haruhi said giving each twin an annoyed look.

All eyes were on Haruhi once again as that cute anger was on her face. Kaoru knew this possessive feeling was ridiculous but he couldn't shake it after all the comments the former hosts had made about her. He felt the need to have her all to himself for a few minutes no matter how uncharacteristic and childish it may be.

"May I have this dance?" Kaoru asked her.

"Of course," she said her eyes lighting up. She looked at Mori. He nodded to her very slightly but she had seen it. She beamed her gratitude and followed her husband out onto the dance floor.

"How does Mom always know?" Kenichi asked his brother.

"I don't know. How does she always do that?" Toru asked looking at his Uncle Hikaru.

"Pffft, I have no idea. If you ever find the answer to that let me know. I've been trying to figure that out for years," Hikaru said to his nephews.

"You will never figure her out your mother is unlike anyone else," Kyoya said watching her as she danced in Kaoru's arms. "She's…magical."

Toji glanced at his father knowing he was not one for fanciful words like Uncle Tamaki. It was strange to think his father used such a word to describe Aunt Haruhi.

"No, Kyo-chan, magical is not the right word. I would say Haru-chan is more mystical," Hunny said watching her as well.

"Perhaps that is the better word," Kyoya agreed.

"You guys are kidding right?" Kenichi asked shocked by their descriptions of his mother.

"Not at all," Kyoya said smoothly. "Your mother can see things other people can't. I have been trying to figure her out for years and even I have come up with no other conclusions. She is special that's all there is to it."

Bored the boys looked at each other and decided to continue on with their prank now that their mother was busy. When they turned they ran straight into Mori.

"Uh, Uncle Mori, did you need anything?" Kenichi asked.

Their almost silent Uncle shook his head no.

"Then could you move?" Toru asked trying to step around him.

Again a silent head shake no.

"Why not?" Kenichi asked.

"Your mother," Mori said.

"Man, how did she know?" Kenichi said. They folded their arms across their chests and pouted. Hikaru laughed and decided to go sit with his wife.

Kyoya noticed his son watching Haruhi with all the love and adoration the young boy felt for her clearly in his eyes. His wife loved their son, and she took care about his manners and was involved with helping him with his academics, but as a woman who hungered for the social life she spent very little time doing anything fun with him. Kyoya tried but as a doctor he was not home as often as he would like.

Haruhi was a very different kind of mother. She cooked for her children, read to them, played with them, laughed with them, and she taught them how to love freely. Since Toji spent more time at Haruhi's house then he did at his own she welcomed him with open arms and included him as if he were her own. Toji got quality time with Haruhi and her sons. Kyoya just added it to the ever growing list of things he was eternally grateful to Haruhi for.

Toji felt his fathers eyes on him. He turned and smiled up at him. His father went back to watching Aunt Haruhi. He watched his fathers face in fascination. His dad has been teaching him how to read people. How to analyze situations so that he would know who had good intentions and who was trying to manipulate him.

Although very smart, he was still only ten and still made mistakes in his analysis. There were only three things he was absolutely sure of, one Kenichi and Toru were his best friends, two his father never looked at his mother in the same affectionate way he looked at Aunt Haruhi, and three Aunt Haruhi was his favorite person in the whole world. He smiled when he saw the look in his fathers eyes as he watched her. He couldn't blame him he loved her too.

Hikaru sat at the table with his wife in companionable silence. An orange blur ran across his vision followed by a streak of jet black as his five year old daughter chased Kaoru's five year old son. He smiled at his little girl as she smiled sweetly at him on her way by. Her nearly black eyes lit up with happiness as she ran after Hajime. His daughter loved that little boy as if he were her own brother instead of a cousin.

His heart felt light as he heard her laughter. He felt that unconditional love for her that a father holds for his child. She had penetrated his heart as his wife had but not his bubble. Even they couldn't penetrate that.

He looked at his wife who sat quietly beside him. She was different from Haruhi in every way. His wife was tall and full figured. She had long jet black hair and almost black eyes. Their daughter looked so much like her she could have been any mans even though he knew she was his.

Devilish laughter caught his ear and he turned to where his two oldest nephews sat with Mori standing watch over them. Haruhi had given Kaoru four sons who looked so identical to Kaoru they could have been his own boys. In fact he was mistaken for their father any time he took them any where.

He looked at his wife once more. Yuiko was quiet, reserved, submissive. She was just what he needed. He was attracted to her and loved her just enough to keep the embers warm but not rage out of control. He didn't feel too overwhelmed with his emotions for her as he had with Haruhi. What he felt for his wife was just enough to remain calm, happy, and content. She was happy as well and he was glad.

He had warned her when they began to get serious that there was a part of his heart that she could never touch. A part that would always belong to Kaoru and Haruhi. He explained how he was a part of a bond that no one else could breech. She had said that she understood and was fine with it and she meant it. She had never been jealous of Haruhi the way other woman would have been. She had felt only gratitude toward Haruhi since she helped her be a little less shy, a little more forward with her opinions.

His mother had not been thrilled with his marriage at first since he was marrying such a timid creature and she valued powerful women, but Haruhi wouldn't allow it. She included his wife in every outing, every luncheon, every tea that she had with his mother. She forced the matriarch to get to know his wife and eventually accept her. She would always favor Haruhi but his wife had been grateful to her for her help and his wife loved Haruhi and that made him happy.

"I think I am going to cut in and dance with Haruhi. If you come with me you can dance with Kaoru," he said to his wife.

"No, thank you," she said smiling warmly. "You go ahead."

"I'll be back soon," he said and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

Kaoru looked down at Haruhi as he held her in his arms.

"You look smoking hot," he whispered to her. "I suggest you prepare yourself for round three when we get home."

"Why wait until we get home," she said the fire in his eyes causing a slow burn in her own body.

"Do you have a suggestion?" he asked smiling sinfully at her.

"Well, the Suoh Garden is notoriously large. There must be a dark corner or two somewhere in there wouldn't you agree?"

"I sure would," he said feeling that tightening return to his pants at his wife's suggestion. "We just have to get someone to keep their eye on the boys so they don't cause chaos while we're gone."

"Already taken care of. Mori's been watching over them since we stepped on the dance floor."

"I do like how you always plan ahead," he said his heart pounding in his chest.

"I must confess you make me love our nights together," she whispered softly to him.

"I love our mornings," Kaoru said sincerely.

"Our mornings, why? We have to get up and go to work and be separated for the day."

"That is all true and I hate being separated from you but our mornings are still my favorite because every morning when you open your eyes and look at me I get to fall in love with you all over again."

"Kaoru," she whispered wishing she could kiss him senseless right now.

"I can't think of a better way to start my day," he whispered in her ear pulling her close. He hissed when her body skimmed across his.

Haruhi felt arms wrap around her waist from behind and she smiled.

"Hikaru," she whispered.

"May I have this dance?" he asked moving so he could face them both. He gasped at the heated look in both of their eyes.

"You do realize how hungry you two look for each other, right?" he asked.

"Here dance with my wife before I change my mind," Kaoru said.

As he passed Haruhi to his brother all three of their hands touched. All of their eyes softened in contentment at the contact. Hikaru's chest tightened as he felt a tug on that thread that bound the three of them together. The thread that encircled them in that bubble that still contained only three people. That could only ever contain three people. A higher number just wasn't possible.

Hikaru looked down at Haruhi and saw the heat return to her eyes as her gaze followed Kaoru as he walked away.

"Jeez, Haruhi, you two should get a room," he said as he pulled her in his arms and began moving easily with her.

She started laughing.

"You think that's funny. I am very serious. If you could see the look in your eyes right now you would be agreeing with me instead of laughing."

"I'm only laughing because Kenichi said the same thing to Kaoru when he was kissing me in the limo."

"In the limo, in front of your sons. Man, you have turned Kaoru into such a pervert," Hikaru said in his teasing voice.

"Me? You two were both perverts long before I met you."

"Yeah, you're right," he said with his trademark smirk. "But you still shouldn't be doing those things in front of your boys. What a bad example you're setting for my nephews."

"Please, I could never set a worse example then you or your brother. I'm not the one who got them banned from the Ohtori water park," she said looking at Hikaru pointedly.

"Hey, that tidal wave was not my fault," he said defensively. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

He thought about that prank and smiled.

"Although even you must admit it was hilarious when all those uptight CEO's had washed out of the pool and were left sprawled out on the cement," he said his amber eyes sparkling with mischief.

"Yes, I thought it was funny until I was faced with the horror of finding out my own sons were involved."

They laughed easily together the way only long time friends could. Hikaru put his hand on her head and pulled her closer to him. Her face laid gently on his chest as he moved on the dance floor with her.

Haruhi chuckled at the memory at the water park. There was something devilish laced through the Hitachiin DNA and her sons did not escape inheriting it. Yet she knew they all fulfilled her life in a way no one else could even if she had to work to keep them out of trouble.

Haruhi pulled back slightly and smiled her natural smile at him her big brown eyes shining with happiness.

As he looked down at her he thought about all the different roles she has played in his life. She went from strange boy, to stranger girl, to amazing girl, to best friend, to girlfriend, and finally to sister. He was so happy about the last role since by marrying his brother she became a part of his family and he would never lose her. The one consistency through the majority of those changes were his feelings for her.

He tightened his hold on her and pulled her back against him. The moment he did the tightness in his chest released. He could finally take a relaxing breath.

"I love you, Haruhi," he said voicing the words he has felt since their first year of high school.

"I love you too, Hikaru," she said smiling against him.

As the song ended Kaoru returned to reclaim his wife. Hikaru's eyes caught kaoru's as Haruhi stood between them. Kaoru smiled, not one of their trademark smirks, but a soft genuine smile of happiness. Hikaru knew he and his brother were thinking the same thing as they always did.

No matter how many years passed, through business associates, friendships, marriages, and children the world still really contained only two groups of people; Us and Everyone else.

The End.

A/N(again): Ahhh! Now I'm sad that's it over! :( I wish to thank everyone for their kind words and support and now I will beg you to give me your final thoughts on this story. Please, please, please, if you have been reading this please let me know what you think of the ending. Were you happy? Sad? Disappointed? Satisfied? I would really like to know what you thought about them in the future. I appreciate your time and your thoughts. Arigato!

P.S. Don't forget about my new story. I was so involved in this ending I haven't written a second chapter yet but I hope to do so real soon.


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Ouran High School Host Club, Romance