Harry Potter, Naruto 1. Chapter 1

Demons and Wands.

**I do not own Naruto or Harry Potter. If I did, I would be a multimillionare, and this would be canon. lol. Enjoy.**

**As a note, this fic chapter is dedicated to Peshomaro. One of my favorite authors who sent me a PM about it and inspired me to write.**

Dark days ahead for all it would seem. And tapping his fingers on the desk, Albus Dumbledore would be deeply contemplative as he considered his most recent manuver. Unorthodox though it was to hire one of _them_, it was certainly a more viable option then letting the Ministry have free reign. More so, if this Umbridge was any indication of Fudges newest desire to infiltrate every aspect of Hogwarts and bring it under his control. He sighed and despite his Lemon Drop candies, was still somewhat depressed at that. There was nothing so stifling as beauracracy after all, and more so in a time where inaction could prove most deadly.

This was one of the reasons among many that he brought back the old Order of the Pheonix. Staunch defenders of the Light, dedicated to bringing down Lord Voldemort before he could bring about a second reign of terror. Or so he hoped...He was hoping for a lot of things nowadays, and after a moment he glanced up at the portrait in the corner as the being spoke.

"Your visitor is here Headmaster. And a most unruly character as well, do you really think-" Dumbledore would raise a hand in reply, a slight weariness to his posture in his chair that had been fast growing for a while as he spoke. "-It was either him, or the Ministries choice and I for one, am not really inclined to let a stooge of The Ministry into Hogwarts. Who knows what kind of mischeif she might get into?" The portrait snorted and crossed his arms. "The same could be said of this new man. Nevertheless Albus, I shall do as you say."

And with that, he left to alert someone to the newcomer, allowing Dumbledore to tidy up a little before the door creaked open and his newest recruit for the post of Defense against the Dark Arts entered. For such a massive man, his tread was unusually silent. More so, even for the kind of being he and his kind were said to be. His lower face, masked by bandages and a metal forehead protector adjusted crookedly on his forehead. He was shirtless as well, revealing a physique hardened by his physical labors as well as various scars here and there as a testament to his work. A little rough around the edges, even by Dumbledores broad standards. Desperate times called for desperate measures however, and with a smile that belied none of his misgivings he stood up and spoke.

"Welcome to Hogwarts, Mr. Momochi." And with a scowl unseen, Zabuza Momochi glared across the desk at Dumbledore as he growled in reply. "Lets just get this over with." He didn't want this job. Hell, he wanted nothing to do with the Sticks, the derogatory nickname shinobi had for the wand wavers of the European countries. But desperate times called for desperate measures, and he didn't trust Gato when he came with his offer to kill the bridge builder. And so, it was to his immense surprise later that he got an owl, and one bearing a letter for him as well as a bottle cap. He could see some of the benefits however, and so here he was. About to become a teacher for a lot of squalling brats who couldn't tell the blunt end of a kunai. He made a note then and there to take it out in blood later.

Perhaps noting his discomfort, Dumbledore smiled at the increasingly stony-faced and tense missing-nin. "Very well then. To start with, perhaps we might go over you and your talents in the role you shall play here?" Zabuza grinned behind his mask mirthlessly as he spoke.

"I am the Demon of the Bloody Mist. I kill in the dark, and leave nothing living in my wake. I am proficient in poison, in the sword. I have slaughtered hundreds to quench my blood thirst, and I have come here. What is it you wish of me?" He would eye Dumbledore as he said this, wondering how the old man would react. Dumbledores response was to scribble out a note on his desk as he spoke cheerfully.

"Wonderful! Excellent teacher material then!" Zabuza's eyes widened briefly at that, caught off guard and would look at Dumbledore like he was crazy before he chuckled. A harsh noise, but a chuckle nevertheless. Dumbledore would take this as a small victory as he looked up at him and spoke. "The terms are relatively simple. So long as you don't kill our students, nor do anything to actively put them in harms way, you are allowed almost full reign in your lessons and your methods of teaching. You also shall be on alert in the school, in case of danger and make no mistake Mr. Momochi ...There will be danger. One of our own most dangerous Dark Wizards has come back, though most will be trying to ignore it."

Zabuza snorted at that and spoke, his voice full of scorn. "Idiots. But what can you expect from Civilian Sticks?" Dumbledore would glance up at Zabuza, his voice light as he spoke. "Another thing I would require is for you to refrain from such terms. Hogwarts has always tried to be a place of tolerance and it will go better with you and your charge I feel if you strive to learn from us, as we shall learn from you." Zabuza almost sighed at this particular part, but would nod. It was just another mission after all. "Fine. Anything else?" Dumbledore considered and spoke casually. "Well...About your..."Unique" weapon. I don't suppose-"

Zabuza's glare would detract most people as he snapped. "The sword stays." The only way anyone would deprive him of his blade was if they were to pry it, from his cold, dead fingers. Sensing that he would get nowhere at that, he would nod and speak. "Very well then. In which case, may I offer my sincere congragulations on your post to the Defense Against the Dark Arts?" Zabuza snorted in reply and made a hand sign. "You may not." And with that, he vanished in a swirl of sudden mist. Startling, but nothing Dumbledore hadn't seen before and with a chuckle, the portrait next to him would speak.

"I foresee interesting times ahead Albus, more so when the Ministry comes about and finds out about this one." Dumbledore sighed and indulged himself in another Lemon Drop as he spoke. "Don't remind me." Time will tell however, if this new teacher would prove to be all he hoped for.

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	2. Chapter 2

Three days in this godforsaken castle, and already the Demon of the Bloody Mist was regretting his choice of careers. The stairs kept changing so that you never went to the same place twice, the slides and secret passageways were known to every single student and quite frankly, the traps were insulting and childish. A disappearing step? A poltergeist? He chuckled briefly at the last thought, concerning his first meeting with Peeves who seemed to be a collective of chakra from what he could sense.

Didn't mean he couldn't still fear however, and a little killing intent later ensured that he would never again, attempt to throw water balloons at a Mist Ninja. Er…. Former Mist Ninja. Truth be told, he would have most likely left a while back if it wasn't for several factors. One of which was his tool, who was pleased as punch that he had gotten himself a stable job instead of going out into the cold to kill people like he longed to do now. It was getting really hard now to disappoint Haku on purpose and so with gritted teeth he kept at it. The second was the food. Haku was a wonderful cook, but overall the sheer variety and quantity of food this place had for the taking was incredible for the normally, spartan ninja. He'd get fat at this rate, and a fat ninja was a dead ninja. Er…

For a moment, he recalled the Akamichi clan of Konoha and amended his thoughts. A fat, non-Akamichi ninja is a dead ninja. And thus satisfied with his logic, Zabuza gnawed on some buttered pastries he had liberated earlier as he walked out for the grounds. Time to exercise some fat off!

"Things seem to be going swimmingly with our new colleague, don't you think Minerva?" Professor McGonagall frowned as she looked out the window, seeing the seemingly perpetually bad-tempered Zabuza wander outside as she glanced at Dumbledore and spoke. "My only fear Albus, is the reactions of the students when they see this one…To say nothing of what his lessons will actually consist of! This is a school…Not a Hidden Village!"

To that, Dumbledore sighed as he looked out the window at Zabuza. Marveling briefly as he strode from land to water on the lake as though it was perfectly natural as he considered McGonagalls words. It was no secret really that there was more than one kind of magic in the world. Wands were just the easiest and most widespread, if with the most reason to fear and hide from those they were sure to misunderstand. The Witch Hunts were a good part of that, to say nothing of the resentment garnered among many families for hiding yet under the veil of secrecy. Well deserved perhaps…Sins, coming home to roost as it were as he recalled ancient history when Wizarding Britain in particular was an Empire, hungry for expansion….And the first meeting with the East.

"Be that as it may Minerva, he truly was the best choice for the job. I have met this Umbridge in passing, and she is…. "Difficult." She would have made this place a misery. Professor Momochi on the other hand…. While he seems gruff in nature, I have no doubt he has a good heart. And in time, we shall all come to see it." Minerva glanced at him, still a little skeptical on behalf of the students. "And you are willing to risk the childrens lives on it Albus?" Dumbledore sighed and looked away as he spoke. "I already have."

The sorting was finished, and Harry Potter was prepared for anything. Considering how he was attacked by Dementors around his Aunt and Uncles house, Harry knew then that no place was truly safe anymore. Perhaps not even Hogwarts. Still, he'll learn all he can if only to not be a burden when the time comes. As well as get revenge for certain nose-breaking ponces and looking at the table for a moment, he blinked as forgetting vengeance for now, he nudged Ron in the ribs.

"Hey. Do you see anything strange?" Ron blinked, looking at the staff table before he got it and spoke. "Blimey…Yeah, no Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher." Hermione frowned at that herself, looking up from her latest book as she added her two cents. "Maybe one of the regulars is doubling? Or it could be that Dumbledore was unable to get anyone this year. Hardly anyone wants the job now." Ron considered this for a moment before his eyes lit up and he spoke with an air of wisdom.

"Maybe, just maybe…The Ministry is trying to prevent candidates from entering in as well? It'd be like the slimy gits to try something like this!" Silence met his words, and at this point every other table in the hall would be noticing it, and whispering to each other what it could mean as Hermione frowned and spoke in a low tone. "I wouldn't put it past them, but it wouldn't make sense just to leave it at that. They'd try to put in their own candidate as well. The fact that they didn't just doesn't make sense."

Rising from his seat, Dumbledore spoke. "Before we begin our start of term, I have an announcement to make. As you no doubt are well aware, once again we are missing our Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. So it with pleasure now, that I introduce him to you. Professor Zabuza Momochi!" And with that, the doors opened with a creak and every eye turned to look with a degree of shock and surprise as they noted the following.

First, moving into the hall in unison came two, cloaked beings. Connected by a spiked chain and wearing breath masks as well as a strange forehead protector that had Hermione gasp in shock. And yet despite the chain, both didn't seem to mind it, nor did it mess with their mobility as each one flipped over to the table, set on the side like attack dogs as they chuckled darkly and glanced at the newest person to enter…As water from a goblet began to rise, followed by others as it formed a square panel of ice. Reflecting some kind of masked boy in it as he stepped out and nodded respectfully in Dumbledores direction before all three paused and turned to look at the door in expectance…Along with everyone else as well. The air began to grow thick….Mist flowed into the room, obscuring many of their views save for the ones closest to the door and the path to the table. And then the footsteps began.

Slow, and steady as the outline of a tall man appeared in sight. Along with the biggest sword Harry had ever seen, strapped to his back as he looked back and forth and moved into the room. Ignoring the whispers, the excitement before raising his hands in a sign and declaring in a loud tone.

"_**KAI!" **_

The mist vanished, the newcomers bowed to the man and Dumbledore stood and clapped. Followed by many others in the room as he continued. "These people with him are our guests, as well as his assistants. Please treat them as you would any other teacher in these hallowed grounds!" Loud applause would follow his words, though Harry would be drawn to the giant sword on the mans back. Was it even possible to use something like that? Hermione on the other hand, with wide eyes would speak.

"That's impossible. They aren't supposed to come here, its in violation of the Treaty of-"

"'Ermoine." His mouth full, Ron would point a fork in her direction. "King's English please." She scoffed in reply and hissed. "Look at that metal forehead protector he's wearing. Look at the symbol." Harry, now that his attention was drawn to it would look somewhat curiously before he spoke. "What about it?" Annoyed that no one else was so much on the same planet, let alone the same wavelength Hermione scowled and spoke heatedly.

"He's a Hidden Village Ninja! If he's here, Dumbledore is getting desperate-"

"-Or he could be off his rocker, we've said that for ages." Ron said cheerfully as he looked at the table. Harry likewise, not understanding a single word of the conversation before he spoke. "What are the Hidden Villages anyway? And does anyone really know about them if they're hidden?"

"Ha, ha, ha." Hermione deadpanned before retorting. "No, they call them hidden mainly because of the secrecy of their techniques. Think of it like a more intense version of the Triwizard tournament we had, on a grander scale. Except the difference between us and them is their look on life. They're mercenaries for the highest bidder and soldiers." This did not have the expected reaction as Ron and Harry exchanged looks.

"_Wicked."_

"Boys." She said scathingly as rising up, she swept her hair out of her face and spoke. "I would head to bed early, except that as prefect now, I'm required to lead the first years. That goes for you too Ron-"

Tuning out the conversation now, Harry would find his gaze going back to the big one. Professor Momochi who even relaxed, looked as though he was prepped to kill and he wondered….What would he teach them? Maybe as a soldier, he might have some wicked, fighting techniques? And with a small smile as he daydreamed of using that sword on Voldemort, he later went to bed content…Who knew what tomorrow would bring?

"Haku, what the hell had I gotten us into?"

Zabuza would speak bluntly as he looked with distaste at the blank piece of paper before him, meant to hold his notes for his weeks lessons. He was a killer, and a damned good one but somehow he had the feeling the skinny Santa Claus who ran the school might take it personally if he gave the kids knives. He snorted. Typical Stick behavior. The wands they used were nowhere near as large as the ones shoved up their- A respectful, quiet tone that always calmed him down would remark.

"I wouldn't know Lord Zabuza."

The quiet, observant type it was with great difficulty that Haku once Zabazu agreed to come here refrained from leaping up in joy. Being a Missing-Nin was hard enough and it was nice for Lord Zabuza to come to a place with a more stable line of employment. And it was as far away from the Hunter-Nin's as anyone could ask for. To say nothing of the legal ramifications. As missing-nin, they could go anywhere they wished, free of the Hidden Villages Mandates. They on the other hand, would slog through paperwork galore and he didn't envy them that much. Far easier to simply look the other way and responded seeing how Zabuza seemed to want something to bounce ideas off.

"Are not the standard practice workable for-"

"-That's the problem right there." And flinging a kunai behind his back, it would lodge into a bullseye set up in his room for that express purpose as he added. "Most of these kids are civilians and way too old to be ingrained in the techniques we use. Their chakra coils have been shaped by their toys, and they are imbalanced. Too much spirit, not enough body. It was their advantage, back in the old days."

Back during the War. Oh, how he wished he could have lived then, to test himself against such. But times had changed and sighing, he tapped his fingers on the desk before finally speaking. "Haku?"

"Yes Lord Zabuza?"

"Writing lessons is dumb."

He was the Demon of the Bloody Mist! There was only one method of teaching and as he thought of his time exploring the grounds, a horrible, truly mind scarring idea for his first lesson came to mind and this paragon of violence, this short-tempered, cantankerous man whose idea of a civil conversation was to stab the other in the face, Zabuza himself….Would _smile. _

He now had his idea.

**Yeah, its been a while. Been busy, love or hate, leave a review. Coming up next: Defense Against the Dark Arts. Alternate title: Teacher from Hell.**


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Harry Potter, Naruto, Humor, Supernatural