Once and Again 1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing! I don't own the characters anymore more than I own Once and Again. I wish I did, but the sad reality won't allow that.

_Skin Deep:_

_Chapter 1_

_The blonde stood on her porch awaiting night fall. She slowly wrapped her arms around her waist as she felt the breeze travel through her entire body. The silence and calming feeling combined with the swiftness of the wind was enough to cause her to tremble. The summer heat was less radiant these days and the wind was blowing in the distance. She never took moments like these for granted. They were few and far between._

_She knew that in less than 12 hours she would have to walk through the front doors of school. In turn that meant that she had 12 hours to be herself. Once she walked through the double doors she would have to put on the face that she wore 24 hours a day. So many people knew her name and what she was about, but none actually knew her. She never allowed anyone the opportunity to get that close to her. In her book, having many alliances was better than having friends. If her ally turned on her, there would be someone stepping in to replace the void, but if a friend were to turn it would be so much more than that. Everything in her life had become a transaction of a sort. She was always exchanging one thing for another._

_During the summer she had the chance to let her hair down. She no longer had to impress anyone. Her brother was one of the only people who ever warranted a genuine smile. She enjoyed his company and much more than that she loved him. He had been there for her on more than one occasion than she could count on both hands._

_The sun was now setting in the horizon as she hugged herself quietly. The sunset is the only constant thing in her life. The sun is the one thing that no matter how stormy the weather was would always set. Most would argue with that because they have nothing better to do. The sun always sets the same way everyday. The only issue is a matter of whether or not you can see it. It rises in the east and sets in the west. She hated the facade that she wore, but she couldn't change that. She knew that no one would take her seriously if she were to waltz into school as the girl behind the facade._

Jessie Sammler, where does one even begin? She was the girl who had it all. During her first year of High School she was already a starter on the varsity soccer team. She was also the class president. She was the girl that every other girl either hated or loved. There were no in betweens with this girl. Most of the girls either hated her because they couldn't be her or loved her because they wanted to be her. Every guy wanted to be with her. It was to the sickening point that most guys would do anything for the smallest of acknowledgements. Most days she didn't have to carry her books nor go to the soda machine to her own Orange Soda. Ridiculous isn't it? One would love to say that Jessie was very humble and didn't allow things to go to her head, but that would only be half true. She knew other's feelings about her and used it to her best advantage. If she wanted something no one stood in her way unless one had a death wish.

"Jessie...Jessie..."

She didn't have a problem with Grace at all. The two had come a long way from how they were in the beginning. She enjoyed the girl's company. In fact Grace was the only other person in her life that she cared a great deal about. The two could sit around for hours talking about nonsense but sometimes it was more than she could handle. Today was one of those days she didn't feel the need to be bothered.

She wanted to be alone. She knew she wouldn't have the chance when daylight shown. Now was her time. She was half tempted to pull a cigarette out of her pocket. She chose otherwise. Eli had often lectured her of the dangers of smoking. She could still hear his voice lecturing her.

_"Jessie. Those things are disgusting," Eli said pointing to her hand._

_"Kinda like you."_

_"How did I end up with you as my sister?"_

_"Dunno but you love me." She said smiling. She loved their banter._

_"Don't let it go to your big head." He said taking the cigarette out of her hand._

_"Hey I wasn't done with that."_

_"And?" She tried pouting but only earned a laugh from him. "You really need to stop smoking. You're not even old enough to buy them yet."_

_"Whatever Father Eli."_

_"You make me sound like a priest or something."_

_"You act like one."_

_"Whatever. I better not catch you smoking one of those nasty things again."_

She knew that if you smoked enough you could get a number of sicknesses and diseases. She simply ignored what the doctors had to say. There were a number of things that were far worse than smoking and yet people still did them. She wasn't addicted to nicotine or anything. It was something she had started several months before her mother was in the hospital. She only smoked when she was stressed. It was the only thing that could clear her head. There was something about the feeling of the smoke filling her lungs that help her become at ease.

She was content with staying outside if it weren't becoming so chilly. The summer warmth was coming to an end. She knew that it would only be a few weeks before she would have to wear many layers of clothing. When growing up with the cold temperatures one either learns to live with it or simply hate it all together. She had learned to hate it.

She felt a hand tap her shoulder. Ordinarily if she were anywhere but home she would be worried. The two said nothing for several moments. They just enjoyed the calming feeling. The two had once been so close before he had gotten remarried. He had always known exactly what was on her mind. Things had changed in the past 2 years.

"Honey what are you doing out?"

She remained silence for several seconds. "I was just thinking."

"About school?" She nodded. "You ready for it?" She shrugged her shoulders. "You should be excited Jessie. You only have a year and a half left."

"I know but I don't know. Shouldn't I be feeling... I don't know, better than what I am now?"

"Well how are you feeling?"

She shrugs her shoulders aloofly before looking at her feet. He smiled at her reassuringly letting her know that it was ok. "Have you ever felt like you didn't belong?"

"Of course... we all have those moments, well most of us. Everyone loves you Jessie. You'll be fine. You're graduating 6 months earlier than your class, you'll be fine."

"You're right." She said letting out a huge sigh. "Not sure why I was even worried."

"You know everything is going to be ok." She knew he was only trying to make things better, but he wasn't helping her at all. "We're all going to be fine, Jessie."

"I know dad. I know... it's only been 2 years though."

"We'll make it through. Don't you worry." She forced a smile as her father placed a kiss on her forehead.

The school day hadn't even started and she was already putting on her mask. She could only imagine what the sunrise would bring her. The girl enjoyed the sunset and despised the soon set. Two years ago things were so much simpler. She didn't have a care in the world. She was at total ease with everything.

--

_**June 4, 2005**_

_**So my therapist said it would be best if I started this Journal. I don't see the point. She says it'll be nice if I recollect my thoughts and activities every day. I don't understand why I must do this but I do. She obviously get's paid that nice 6 figure a year for a reason. I won't argue with her superior wisdom. I am surprised she hasn't asked me to write down what I am eating on a day to day basis. I mean after all that was the point of me going to counseling anyway right? Whatever... enough complaining... well for now hehe.**_

_**Today Eli and I had a blast. We played soccer in the park. He said something about him schooling me... Psh. He wish. I was kicking his ass. Every kick and slide tackle was too much to handle. He seemed distracted by something. When we finished he started flirting with these girls. I don't get him or the girls he flirts with. They can obliviously tell he is a player. He blatantly flirts with each of them in front of the others. I don't get it, but whatever. It must be the Sammler genes or something. We're hot. What can I say? I am not full of myself. I am just very confident.**_

_**After I played soccer I had to go shopping with Grace. That girl has issues. I swear she does. She picked out this red dress that was repulsively the color of a tomato. She thought it was the hottest thing ever. Someone really needs to spice up her wardrobe. I would eagerly take the job if it weren't for her annoying habit of trying on 3 different sizes of every article of clothing. Seriously! Then she ends up picking the middle size every time. Ugh, I'll live though.**_

_**Anyway I have an early start tomorrow. Eli is planning on schooling me again in soccer. Psh... whatever. I'll let him think he's better than me. I'd hate to kill his huge ego. It'd suck to know that you're younger sister is way better than you. :)**_

--

The sun brightly hung overhead as the dynamic duo exited the house together. Neither Jessie nor Grace wanted to go school. They both had their reasons. Grace simply was nervous about being a senior. She didn't have the slightest clue what she wanted to do with her life. The only certainty she had was that she didn't know anything at all. UCLA was something she had dreamed about for so long. Was she really cut out for it?

They both reached the car saying nothing. They were both wrapped up in their own nervous feelings. Grace unlocked the car and let them both in. She sat there for a moment not doing anything at all. She was more nervous than usual.

As if reading her thoughts Jessie brought her back from back to the present, "You're going to be ok Grace."

"I really don't know Jessie... I honestly don't. You've still have a bit of time. Today is the start for me." Jessie offered her a reassuring smile saying nothing. Grace enjoyed this moment in which she got the chance to see a side of Jessie that others only dreamt of seeing.

"Oh stop being a baby. Put the key in the ignition and start the car. It's really not that hard."

Grace was about to say something smart to her step sister. She decided otherwise and started the car. The two said nothing as they drove to school. Both were in their own world.

Shortly after they enter the doors of Upton Sinclair. Jessie was already felt the need to vomit. She was sick of seeing the same people every year. She was ready for college. She was ready for a whole new pool of people. She noticed a familiar face walking their way.

"Great this is another lovely school year in the making." Jessie said sardonically.

"Be nice."

"Alright... I'll be nice." Grace knew she had no intention of being nice. It was the thought that counted.

"Hey you guys!" An excited Grace yelled as she ran towards her best friends. A bit too excited for her step sister's likings.

"Hey Grace." Tad said as he smiled warmly engulfing her in a huge hug.

"Hola chica," Katie said to as she looked at her best friend.

"How was Cancun?" Grace asked.

"It was good. I mean it was great...anything is better than being here for obvious reasons..." she said as she nodded towards the blonde that was approaching.

"Oh well if isn't tacky Barbie and her Siamese brother." Jessie hostilely said.

"Your insults never get old, huh?" The blonde shook her head. "What do you want anyway, Sammler?" Katie responded with equal hostility.

"Awww...It seems Cancun did you no good. It's supposed to improve you in some way, but you're still the same."

"Whatever. I am going to be late the first day back. If I am late I want it to be for something worth it." She said as she grabbed Tad's hand and intertwined their fingers. "I'll see you later Grace."

Both Grace and Jessie couldn't help but gawk at the change in interaction between the two. The two had practically been attached at the hip since they were in diapers, but this was uncharted territory. Katie had changed after all and the blonde could do nothing. She continued to stare in the direction the two had gone.

"Jessie must you bother her this year?"

"Bother who?" She smirked mischievously. The girl already had plans of her own. She knew just the way to make the girl's life a living hell.

"Don't play dumb."

"Ohhh!!" Jessie mocked surprise. "You were talking about _that_."

Even Grace couldn't help but laugh. She had learned that Jessie would never let up on anything, so she dealt the best way.

"_That_ meaning Katie I am assuming, then yes." The smaller girl just laughed showing recognition. "Can't you just go easy on the girl this year? She's done nothing to you."

"Sure she did. I can think of a number of things."

"Can you think of anything that she's done directly to hurt you?"

The blonde looked away trying not to show her defeat. "No she hasn't but that isn't the point. If I give her a break everyone else will expect the same from me." She said as if it were the most logical thing.

"You sound like a dictator or something."

"I am a tyrant. Get it right." Her step sister couldn't help but laugh at her arrogance.

"You are too much Jessie Sammler."

"You sound surprised," the blonde stated as she shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly.

"I am not, but they're the same damn thing."

"Whatever. Tyrant sounds more intimidating."

"I still wonder how my mom ended up marrying your dad." Jessie rolled her eyes.

"You and me both," the blonde said smiling before skipping off to her first class, economics.

She rushed down the hallway as she heard the bell ring. She was already late on the first day of class. She was really trying to be on time this year. She wasn't in the mood to have detention every day all year long.

She entered the freezing class. She had forgotten how cold he kept his class. His theory is if he keeps it cold none of his students will have a chance to get too comfortable. In turn they will not be able to fall asleep. She wouldn't have been able to fall asleep even if she wanted to.

"Better late than never," Mr. Roberts said as the blonde entered the room after the bell had sounded.

"I have to keep my track record in tact," she said smiling.

"Just find your seat. They're in alphabetical order."

"Wait a second... I have this class with her and I have to sit in front of her?" Jessie pointed at the Katie. "This is what I get for being so smart." She slowly walked to the seat in front of Katie.

"Oh save it Sammler," remarked Katie.

"Who rang your bell Singer?"

"No one, but since you're talking about me... well you know the rest," she spat at the girl. "Now can you please stop talking about me! It's bad enough I have to be in this small square with you."

"You think I want to be in here with you Barbie?"

"Sammler...really... come on now that's all you've got," the brunette said unfazed. She was accustomed to the girl's insults. "By the way Tad says hi," she said as she read the text.

The two had only been apart for a mere twelve seconds and were already texting one another. She watched as the blonde turned around angrily.

"Ms. Sammler... Ms. Singer..."

"Yes Mr. Roberts," the girls said in unison innocently.

"Do we really have to go through this all semester?" He already knew the girls were supposed mortal enemies. Anyone would be blind to not notice.

"As long as Singer doesn't talk to me, we're good sir," Jessie said smiling innocently at him.

"We'll be good," Katie said before giving a last glance towards the blond. Then began to text her boyfriend back.

--

The first day of school was much better than she could have hoped. She expected things to be horrible. Returning to school was always an adventure in it's self. No one ever returned to school the same. Most guys came back to school with facial hair or something that showed how much they had grown up. The truth is that they're still as immature as the day school end the previous year.

She got off lucky this year. She didn't have to deal with too many annoyances. She was able to sit back and relax. Her classes were going to be a breeze. She would have loved to have had more classes with her friends. This year her main concern was graduation. She was ready to move on with her life. She was excited to find she had best friend having lunch earlier during the day. Grace made things more bearable. She quietly made her way outside after dinner. She had gone through the usual 20 question process. What was it with parents constantly wanting to know about their child's first day of school? It was like any other day. It was nothing monumental. It was just another day. The first day of school was always the same.

Her parents always said that the first day of school was the beginning of something great. She was still waiting for the greatness. Thirteen years later she still found nothing great. She knew they were always referring to her life as a lawyer. Her father was expecting her to be the top of class. He wanted her to apply to all the right schools. Secretly he was hoping she would get into Harvard. He had graduated from there some years ago. He always offered her words of wisdom. Most of the wisdom went in one ear and out the other. She always smiled and nodded as she went on her way.

She could only put on a happy face for so long. She pulled out a cigarette and lit it. Her nicotine fix was the only thing that kept her going. It was the only thing that kept her from becoming a humanized robot.

_"Aw... so you're the culprit?" He asks grabbing the cigarette._

_"What culprit? I am just having a smoke."_

_"Exactly...why?"_

_"I don't know... because I can," she says trying to get a rise out of him. "You act like I am committing a crime."_

_"Only suicide, but it's your funeral," he says plainly._

_"I think I'll be alright. Besides I am only 15 anyway. I'll be fine."_

_"You say that now. You're not even old enough to buy these... things." He says putting out the cigarette._

_"Oh give me a break. I already have a father who is always on my back. I don't need you." She says pulling out another cigarette and lighting it. "Don't steal this one or we're going to have problems."_

_"Speaking of if you give my sister another one of those. I'll..."_

_"You'll what Sammler?"_

_"Not sure but I'll come up with something Singer."_

She inhaled the cigarette. Each puff began to calm her nerves. She was breaking the confined mold as the smoke filled her lungs. She felt the smoke burning her lungs causing an amazing sensation. The feeling never grew old. It was something she looked forward too each time she lit a cigarette up.

Daddy's little angel was a smoker. He would have someone's head if he knew the truth.

She had to deal with the pain. She couldn't stop the hurt she was feeling. For the past 2 years she had to deal with the turn in events. The one day that changed her life. The first day of school was always a reminder of the dreadful day when her life changed.

She couldn't help but feel frustrated. She wanted to feel happy. She wanted to be content. She had the perfect parents, the perfect boyfriend, and an amazing best friend. She felt like she had nearly everything; however, something was missing and there was nothing she could do to fill the void.

"Katie!"

"Coming mother."

She took the last puff of her cigarette. She exhaled slowly as she opened the screen door. She no longer had to put any effort in making her parents happy. As long as they saw her smiling they let her be. She felt her cheeks involuntarily raise to form hearing the sound of the door close.


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2: You've gotta be kidding!_

_The bell sounded loudly as the students made their way to their seats. Jessie had already been in class long before the bell rang. She wanted no reason to have detention if it was avoidable. She noticed Katie come in to the classroom cheerfully. The sight alone almost made her nauseous. The brunette sashayed to her seat without a single glance to the blonde. She seemed to not even acknowledge Jessie._

_Instead of causing an altercation, Jessie pulled out her IPOD in an attempt to drown out the noise surrounding her as she flipped through the pages of her journal. Her classes were becoming more and bland as the days increased. School had only been in session for roughly a month, and she couldn't wait to get out. She impatiently waited for the bell to ring to dismiss her from school every day. Soccer practice was the only thing keeping her sane, and today was the one day she didn't have them. Thursday was a day of rest as their coach liked to say. She knew that it was code for "night out with the guys to get wasted"._

_--_

_**June 8, 2005**_

_**Eli and I were at mom's today. It was fairly fun to say the least. I am kind of mad that I didn't get to train, but I'll live. Mom is crushing on this guy, Mike. It's too cute and obvious to everyone but them. He seemed like a nice guy. I wouldn't complain if they ended up dating. I won't bring out the streamers and confetti either. I do want her happy though. I am still stuck on Dad and Lily. How'd that happen? Seriously?**_

_**I can't get over my dad's marriage. I don't see how those two got hitched in the first place. I mean there is nothing wrong with Lily. But really? Come on! Her daughter is Grace Manning for Christ's sake! How much worse can it get? Ugh! Anyway, I think Mike might ask my mom out. I just saw them getting all cozy on the couch. It amuses me how romance varies with the generations. Someone my age would already have their tongue jammed down the other's throat.**_

_**Anyway, today was quite boring. I really don't have much to talk about. Without soccer my life is boring.**_

_**June 13, 2005**_

_**Hmmm let's see here. Can you guess what I did today? Ding ding! Right answer. I got to train! Eli wasn't there, but I still got to kick the ball around a bit. A few girls from the high school were there. It seemed like they had the right idea. Obviously everyone already knows that I am "Baby Sammler". What is that about? I mean come on. I am not going to be known as Baby Sammler all my high school career.**_

_**After that, I ended up going to watch The Fantastic Four. What can I say? I secretly have an obsession with comic book movies. Spiderman has yet to be topped though. None of them have even come close to touching that movie. Don't get me wrong. Jessica Alba was fantastic. Haha... no pun intended, but really she was! I think it's a Jessica thing or something. "With great names like Jessica..., comes great awesomeness." Yeah, I know. That's not what Uncle Ben says. Do I like the old guy though? Exactly!**_

_**Well, later.**_

--

Jessie returned from her trance. Things were so simple two years prior. She sighed deeply before closing the journal as Mr. Roberts began writing on the white board in the front of the class. He clearly wasn't aware of the students doing everything but what they were supposed to be doing. Some of the students were text messaging, others were beat boxing, and some were so stoned out of their minds that they were falling out of their chairs.

"Ok, you guys. We're going to be doing a group activity. I am going to give you a partner, and you guys are going to draw for occupations. We're going to see who can budget their money the best."

"Are you flipping serious Mr. Roberts? This is dumb," Jessie stated; causing the rest of the class to laugh, except for the brunette who always seemed unamused by the girl's antics.

"Is it possible for you to shut up for five minutes?" Katie asked annoyedly. The girl had to comment about everything, and it was getting tiresome.

"I don't recall snapping my fingers, whistling, or even barking. So why are you even talking, Singer?" Once again the blonde managed to get the class to laugh. The girl had so many minions. They would find her funny even if she wasn't.

"Sammler, go to hell," Katie responded; causing the girl to shut up. The class simply stared in awe.

"Ms. Singer, please refrain from using curse words in my class."

"But... Jessie...ugh you've got to be kidding me!"

"No buts. In fact, I know who my first two partners are going to be. Since you two seem to get along so well, you and Ms. Sammler will be our first pairing."

"Mr. Roberts, please? Anybody but her. Come on, please?" Katie begged desperately, "I will do anything," she said while putting her hands together in an attempt to show how pathetic she really was at the moment.

"No, Ms. Singer. You and Ms. Sammler really need to get over whatever issues you have. You'll be spending lots of time together."

"Ugh..., why do I get stuck with the tackiest Barbie of them all. Look at her," Jessie obnoxiously said as she pointed at the brunette.

"I am not exactly thrilled to have you either," Katie said while glaring at the girl.

The bell sound loudly after Mr. Roberts finished calling out all of the groups to the class. No one was shocked to find out who their partner was. It would either be the person in front of or behind them. Someone they talked to on a day to day basis. It would only be a week. They had to pretend as though they had just gotten married and cover all the expenses. Everyone seemed to have lucked out, except for Clark Kent and Lex Luther.

"Look, how about you just do your part of the project, and I'll do mine. That way we won't even have to see each other?" the blonde suggested with slight nervousness in her voice.

"Umm..., believe me I'd be more than happy to do that, but there is one thing that makes me more happy," she said as she raised her eyebrow. The younger girl stared at her waiting for her response, "And that's passing. So if you don't mind, we have a week. It won't kill us."

"Are you sure about that, Singer?"

"Not really. I need this grade though," She said while she looked at her feet.

Jessie hesitated a moment. "Is it worth dying for?" she asked with a smirk on her face. She tried to conceal it, but couldn't. The other girl couldn't help smiling either. The two glanced at each another before looking away nervously.

Neither girl was thrilled to have to spend an entire week with the other. They both knew this was a disaster waiting to happen. Katie anticipated the things the other girl was going to put her through.

"Fine, meet me at my house at five. Don't be late, Singer," the blonde advised before skipping off.

Jessie couldn't explain the nerve wrecking feeling she had as she walked away from the brunette. She was beyond nervous to work with the girl. It was so easy to see her at school. The two could choose to ignore each another. Now they were forced to converse and attempt to be civil.

--

Katie angrily paced around the lunchroom; looking for her boyfriend. She couldn't believe how the day had turned from great to horrid. Her morning was great. She had opened her locker to find a Snicker; her favorite candy bar. She knew it was from Tad. He was always doing small gestures that would go unnoticed by most. He was never one to expect a grand expression for a thank you. As soon as she got to class, she had to see Jessie. That made her day go downhill just a bit. When she found out she was partnered with her, the entire day went to shams. She saw her best friend walking her way. Grace had a smirk on her face as she made her way towards her friend. She couldn't help but find amusement in her best friend's turmoil.

"So I heard about your project," she said while raising her eyebrow, "You and Jessie under the same roof at my house... I am seriously going to die."

"It's not that serious," Katie said sadly, "And anyway, how are you going to die? You're not the one going to be there. You'll be on your big date."

Grace tried to hide the smirk that crossed her face, but failed horribly in the process. Her best friend merely rolled her eyes and turned to look away. "What's wrong? You know I was only kidding."

"It's just... I dunno... Jessie and I have not spoken a word outside of school, since... well..."

"Yeah, I know. You'll be fine. Just call me, and I'll rush home. If she hasn't killed you already."

Grace found herself incapable of wiping the smirk off her face. She wanted nothing more than witness the hell mouth open later in the evening.

--

The rest of the day went smoothly. Katie found herself nervous as she reached the steps of the sammler/manning residence. She quickly rang the door and was greeted with all smiles.

"Hey, Katie."

"Hi, Lily. How are you?"

"Fine thanks. The weather isn't really helping anyone though," she said as she pointed to the rain that was not letting up anytime soon, "Are you here to see Grace?"

"Actually... no," the woman looked confused, "I am here to see Jessie." The confusion only grew on her face. Katie had to suppress a laugh. The expression on her face was priceless. "We have a project to do."

"Oooh... ok," she let out a sigh of relief, "Well, you do know where her room is, right?"

"Of course," Katie admitted; stepping inside before she walked up the stairs.

"Let me know if you guys need anything," Lily replied as her parental instincts kicked in.

"Will do," Katie answered with a smile.

Katie walked up the stairs slowly. She had to push herself to actually go all the way up. If she were to look down at all she knew that she wouldn't have the guts to continue up the stairs. Her nerves were nearly getting the best of her. She heard Tracy Chapman's voice for a few seconds, and then suddenly the song stopped.

"Whoever you are..."

"It's me," Katie confessed timidly when she reached the top of the stairs.

"It's you," the blonde snarled, "I thought I said 5:00?" she said as looked at the clock.

"Sammler.., you said don't be late. Geez..." Katie tried to hide her frustration as she looked at the clock. It was 4:56, and the girl was giving her a hard time.

"Whatever...anyway, you're supposed to be a lawyer, right?" the brunette nodded, "I am a doctor, so money isn't really going to be an issue."

"Money is the least of our issues." Katie stated under her breath.

"Weren't you the one who insisted we actually work together?"

"Yeah..." She suddenly felt bad for her comment. This was not going to be easy working with the world's most bi-polar girl on the planet.


	3. Chapter 3

Skin Deep

Chapter 3

Katie stood idly staring around the room. Her discomfort was evident in her actions. Her nails were now down to the wick. Jessie continued to stare at the brunette amusingly. She waited to see if the girl would sit down on her own accord. It didn't surprise her when she had to say something.

"You know you can have a seat." Jessie stated pointing to the end of the bed.

Katie nodded and mumbled her thanks before sitting down beside the blonde. The pair wasn't delusional enough to think this assignment was going to be a walk in the park.

Things had never been simple for them. Even when they were moderately uncomplicated, they were still more complex than imaginable.

Jessie immediately smirked as she noted the brunette's lack of confidence. She wasn't sure why she found it amusing, but she was having a hard time stifling a laugh. Abruptly the brunette's mood changed. In less than a minute she went from being nervous and maybe even a little awkward to just plain sad.

"You ok there, Singer?" Jessie asked sincerely.

The truth was she was far from ok. She hadn't been ok in years.

_The brunette made herself right at home. She was mesmerized with the hominess of the attic. The dust could eventually become a problem, but it was away from everyone else. She envied the blonde for having her own sanctuary. Even though it was entirely secluded from the rest of the house it was still as lively as the next room. _

"_So this is where the infamous baby Sammler lies. It's cozy." _

_Jessie looked at her new friend with disbelief, "Cozy? Are you serious?"_

_The brunette sassily nodded her head , "Yup cozy." _

_Jessie shyly looks down at her friend who is now sprawled out on her bed holding on to her favorite pillow. _

"_You know this is your bed… you can lie down with me." _

_Instantly Jessie's cheeks turn blood red, "Yeah I know." _

_Instead of lying down Jessie paces back and forth across the room nervously. There was something about the brunette that made her insides do circles, jumping jacks and anything else that wasn't stationary. A part of her hated the feeling, but an even larger part couldn't get enough of it. _

"_So you and Eli, huh?" _

_Her friend sits up from the bed and shrugs her shoulders, "I guess." _

_The conviction behind her voice was lacking. There was no certainty. Nothing was there to show any sentiment . The words were hollow and nonchalant. _

"_You guess?" _

"_Yup I guess." Jessie wasn't quite sure why she found relief in the words. "Now can we talk about something else?" The brunette pleaded. _

"Yeah I'm fine." Katie replied

Jessie glanced once more at the brunette making sure she was really ok. She couldn't quite understand why it even mattered.

"Whatever. Let's get this project started." Jessie stated in a feeble attempt to maintain control of the situation. The situation meaning her façade that was slowly slipping away. She was not going to let 5 minutes with the brunette break down everything she had worked so hard to build.

--

The duo worked on their projects for approximately two hours without any disturbances. Things were going more smoothly than either had anticipated. Awkwardness was ever present. Jessie was nice enough to lay low on the sarcasm and Katie was kind enough to do the same. Neither girl wanted to give the other reason start anything. Even for a short time the girls had come to a non-verbal truce.

"You do realize that we've gotten absolutely nothing accomplished?" Jessie stated the obvious as she looked over the paper that had lots of numbers on it.

Katie shrugged, "Well it's not my fault that you're so picky."

"Hey I am not picky, but we are not going to live in a one bedroom apartment in NYC. You must be out of you mind woman."

"Aw… what's wrong Sammler? You don't think we'll actually manage?" Katie joked.

Jessie shook her head adamantly, "Worse I think we'll kill each other."

They both joined in a comfortable laughter. The joyous sound came to a abrupt end when someone began to knock on the door. Katie jumped to the end of the bed, where she had gradually moved from, to put as much space between herself and Jessie as possible. The movement made Jessie sad for a split second but she chalked it up to having had spent entirely too much time with the brunette. It couldn't possibly be anything else.

Neither the blonde nor the brunette was surprised when Grace made her way sauntering up the stairs with a broad smirk on her face. She decided against any sarcastic remarks. The expressions the girls were wearing was warning enough.

"So did you guys finish your project?"

"Does it look like it?" Jessie deadpanned.

Grace shook her head slightly amused that the two had managed to stay in such a confined space alone and make it out alive. "Well I only came up here because my mom wants to know if you'll stay for dinner."

Both girls mouths dropped as if on cue, "I take that as a yes?"

"Uh well…. uh……"

"I'm sure that you have to be back home, right?" Jessie said a little too quickly warranting a peculiar look from Grace and Katie.

"Yeah I guess I kind of do."

Grace grabbed Katie's hand and pulled her from the bed, "That's crazy. You're staying here, Singer."

The truth was Grace actually missed having her best friend over for dinner. She had once spent every waking moment at the Sammler/Manning residence. If she wasn't spending time with Grace it was guaranteed that she was with one of the Sammler children. Now she was only had dinner with Grace at her father's house. There was nothing one could do to get her step foot into the house, which only surprised Grace even more when she'd agreed to show up for the project.

"I guess I am staying."

Unbeknownst to the best friends a small smile played across the blonde's face. A millisecond later it disappeared.

--

Katie couldn't stop fidgeting in her seat. She felt way out of her element. Jessie observed this. A small part of her wanted to alleviate the stress that played across the brunette's face, but it wasn't her place. It infuriated her that she was the only one that was able to perceive what was going on. She would never let anyone know this. Just as she'd never let it be known that there was a small amount of contentment having the brunette sitting directly before her.

"I am so glad you decided to stay." Lily excitedly stated as she scooped salad on her plate.

Katie placed her cup down on the table, "Thanks Lily. I am glad you invited me."

"Well you know you're always welcome here."

Katie shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Jessie was the first to notice as per usual, but remained quiet and waited for Grace to say something to ease the tension.

"Mom really… just let her eat." She winked at her best friend.

Katie mouthed a quick thanks in the direction of Grace.

"Alright then. What exactly is this project that you two have to do?"

Jessie cleared her throat before speaking, "To be honest. I haven't the slightest clue. That would actually require me to pay attention."

A small chuckle erupted from the table. "I can see that I am not going to accomplish anything. Who want's dessert?"

"Me." Everyone said in unison.

Lily returned to the table with small plates with slices of chocolate pie. She knew it was a favorite of all the girls. She knew she'd definitely made the right choice when Jessie didn't wait a second more to dig into her pie. Grace and Zoë took their slow time and Katie just stared at her pie for a second.

She wasn't sure what it was but something was wrong with the brunette. Everyone else had finally dug into their pie and her gaze remained on her plate.

"Katie, hon is everything alright?"

Nearly everyone was too busy devouring their pie to look up. All except the blonde who instantly caught on to the brunette's actions. The two shared a knowing stare. All defenses were gone for a several seconds.

She nodded unconvincingly, "Everything is fine. I'm just suddenly not feeling well."

"Well alright. I hope you feel better." Lily said as any caring mother would.

Katie dismissed herself from the table, thanking Lily and Rick for dinner and saying her goodbyes. Grace was determined to walk her outside, but Katie managed to convince her best friend that she was in a hurry and was fine. One person managed to see right through the lies. She felt the eyes burning a hole in her head. She turned to meet the gaze of the blonde. She saw in those eyes the same hurt and agony she had been feeling all along. Blue eyes conveyed every feeling she had felt for so long. Every emotion she had tried to escape would be invisible to outside world. Jessie Sammler saw right through the façade. Blue eyes burned into her soul. She had convinced herself that she was alone and that no one understood how she felt. The brunette now knew that wasn't the case. Jessie Sammler was feeling the exact same thing only she was better at hiding it.


	4. Chapter 4

_Skin Deep: Chapter 4_

"_Deeper Look" _

_Shortly after Katie left Jessie excused herself from the table. She gathered a few pitied stares from her family. She wasn't ready to talk to them. Jessie knew they had her best interest at heart. Their best interests was the farthest thing she needed. She made her way upstairs. She wanted to be alone. She had to be alone. There was no way she was going to be able to function with anyone around her. Too much had occurred. They were supposed to do the project; not have dinner together. They were not supposed to rehash past events. Though nothing was verbally said enough was written on Katie's face and in her eyes to illustrate her despair. The brunette's anguish transferred to her in those several glances. She felt everything Katie was feeling and wanted no part of it. Katie had only spent the evening with her and was already turning her life upside down again. _

Jessie let out an exasperated sigh as she laid herself on the bed staring at the ceiling. She knew that her life was about to change. It was an all too familiar feeling that only Katie had the ability to stir up. She didn't know if it was the way the wind changed or even the lack of wind but her life was about to take a turn. The only thing she was certain of was the fact that she was unsure of everything. She pulled out the diary she hadn't written in quite some time. She flipped through it to find a particular insert. Very little light managed to penetrate through the window just above her bed. The sun had long past set; yet just enough made the diary passage visible for her to read.

_**June 21**__**st**__** 2005,**_

_**I have to admit life with the Manning's isn't as bad as I had thought it would be. I was half expecting us to kill one another. I'm still alive and so is Grace. She takes too long in the bathroom. That's my number one problem with her. She also puts on too much make-up. It's sickening actually. Zoë is a totally different story. She's pretty awesome. The only problem I have with her is that she talks way too much. Most nights she'll sneak upstairs with me and talk forever. I am too nice to tell her to go to bed. More nights than not she'll fall asleep with me. **_

_**This afternoon Eli and I went to the fields as per usual. He has the hots for this girl. Yes I am just as surprised as you are. I haven't seen him flirting with any of the girls except for this brown haired girl. She's cute enough and she can whip his ass in soccer. That's enough for me to like her. I think her name is Katie or something like that. She's coming over to dinner tonight. It's a big step for him. He has never had a girl over. The closest to home he gets is the back of his pick up truck. Not something I want to think about. I think this girl really likes him too. I can't be certain though. She just hides it better than him. I don't know much about this Katie girl, but I am willing to bet my summer lemonade stand money that she is different from the rest of the girls he dates. **_

_**Well Lily is calling us for dinner so I am going to head downstairs and wash up. This should be an interesting night. I wonder how much I can embarrass Eli in front of his future leading lady. **_

_--_

"_Jessie-- Jessie!" No response as she closed her diary. "Jessica Sammler get your butt downstairs." Eli called from the bottom of the stairs. _

"_Alright." _

"_Don't alright me. Now." He responded in a sad attempt at sounding fatherly. _

_She rushed down to meet her brother who was waiting ever so patiently, "Could you hurry up next time. Gosh." _

_She playfully punched in the gut, "Don't rush me." _

_Eli eagerly wanted to introduce his little sister to his new friend. Girlfriends were never an issue for the good-looking guy that he was. The problem was finding someone that his sister approved of him dating. Every girl he had dating was never good enough for him in her eyes. He personally didn't care. They were just girls that were entertaining for the moment. They all knew that and yet they still flocked to him. _

_He was not one to let his reputation go to waste. He would date a girl for a few weeks and then he would tire of them. There was something different about Katie. She didn't fall at his feet or give in to him. Instead she would rebuff his advances. It drew him to her. At first it was just a challenge to him but the more he talked to her the more he had grown to like her. _

_When the siblings reached the kitchen Jessie took a moment to absorb everything. She had never really seen the brunette close up. She had always seen her from a distance or when she was defending the ball. This was a nice change. It only made her prejudgment of the girl that much more justifiable. She not only appeared to be smart, athletic but also genuinely beautiful. _

"_Jessie did you hear me?" Eli said bringing her back from observation. She shyly looked away from the brunette and her brother. "I take that as a no." _

"_I'm Katie." The brunette said reaching out a hand to the blonde. _

_Jessie took her hand as she felt her arm heat up. The feeling was something she had never felt. Awkwardly she held it a second longer than she had anticipated. The expression on the brunette's face showed that she was well aware of the feeling that had shot through the younger girl's body. Cliché or not it was like an explosion of sort. Jessie jerked her hand away as if it was on fire. _

"_Nice to meet you. I'm Jessie." _

_Eli looked between the girls observing the tension that arisen. He decided not to read too much into it. "Come on let's get some dinner, weirdo." He ran his fingers through the blonde's hair messing it up. _

_Katie laughed at the blonde causing her to turn red. "You think this is funny?" _

"_Not at all." _

_The tension that immediately disappeared. Throughout the dinner the trio talked incessantly. Katie had managed to make herself right at home with the Sammler siblings. Zoë and Grace didn't much to say. They felt almost left out, if not slightly jealous. Both Jessie and Eli had taken a liking to the new girl instantaneously. _

_Following eventful dinner Lily made her way to the kitchen for dessert. Predicable or not she brought out Chocolate pie. It was always a winner. She often wanted to change it up but everyone insisted that she not. So instead of arguing she continued to make her prize winning sugar coma inducing treat. The entire table was quiet as they finished off their pie. _

_Jessie was alone in the kitchen sticking her fingers in the leftover pie. It was something she often did when she knew no one was around. She didn't hear the footsteps behind her. _

"_Caught you red handed-- well chocolately handed." Katie joked. _

_She instantly regretted her joke. She knew it was cheesy. Still the blonde gave her the benefit of the doubt and chuckled at her stupid joke. "Yeah well… what can I say? It's good." _

"_It is pretty good." Jessie quirked an eyebrow. "Ok it's pretty damn good, better?" _

_Jessie victoriously nodded her head in agreement. Jessie continued to dig into the pie. She offered Katie a slice but she kindly declined. She insisted that it was because she was on a diet and one slice was enough for her. She had to keep her figure before school started. _

"_So are you new to the area?" Katie shook her head. "Ok that's strange because I've never seen you around until lately." _

"_I've been around."_

_Jessie took another bite of her pie. "Well I haven't seen you and I'm sure I'd have remembered you." _

_A blush creped across the blonde's face as the realized what she had said. Katie chuckled lightly desperately trying not to blush herself. "Well you know… I meant that it's just--"_

"_Didn't your mother ever teach you not to talk with food in your mouth?" _

_Jessie, eternally grateful she had been saved from any more embarrassment simply nodded continuing to eat her delicious treat. The entire time Jessie felt Katie's eyes on her. Anxiously she turned to meet the gaze. Intense green eyes bore into shaky blue ones. Katie was the first to look away shyly. _

_The pair stood in a comfortable silence both afraid of looking at the other. Neither having ever experienced anything so intense in their entire life and feared what it meant. Moments later the tranquility was interrupted by the voice of the older Sammler. _

"_Katie are you ready for me to take you home." _

_He suddenly became well aware of the piece of pie the blonde was aiming in his direction with a cocky grin on her face. _

"_Jess-- you wouldn't!" _

_An evil smirk crossed the younger Sammler's face, "I wouldn't?" _

_He shook his head almost pleadingly. _

"_You're right I won't but Katie will." _

_She grabbed the brunette girl's hand and aggressively placed it on the plate holding the pie. Together they tossed the pie Eli. The girls burst out in laughter. Eli on the other hand wasn't so pleased. He grabbed another piece of pie and tossed his sister. Instead he hit the girl he had been trying desperately to impress. _

"_Oh I know you did not just hit me." Katie said before grabbing what was left of the pie ._

_Both Sammler's stared in fear, "Aw come on I was trying to hit her. Just put the pie down." Eli pleaded. Secretly he was enjoying every second of it. _

"_Uh uh. Not going to happen." She lunged the pie forward and hit Eli directly on the head. Causing the younger girl to laugh. _

"_Oh you think this is funny?" Eli asked looking at the blonde. _

_Moments later the kitchen was a mess. The counters, the cupboards and the all their clothing was covered in chocolate and meringue. Lily entered the kitchen and was not pleased nor was their father. Nothing was said. All three teenagers knew it was best to get the kitchen spotless. _

"_Wow this has to be the worst impression I've ever made on someone's parents." Katie joked to break the silence. _

_Jessie shrugged her shoulders, "Nah it could have been worse. Plus I think you fit in quite well." _

"_Yeah me too, anyway while you two nice ladies clean up." Both girls stopped what they were doing. If looks could kill he'd have been dead and then some. "Please. I am just getting the car ready to take Katie home." _

_Neither girl answered as they felt strong arms wrap around their necks. "Thanks girls. You're the best."_

_Once again both girls were left alone in the kitchen. Neither knowing exactly what the say. Jessie shyly looked at the brunette when she was sure Katie wasn't looking. Each glance lingering a second more than she'd have liked. Katie found herself doing the same thing. Internally feeling guiltier with each look. She was here with Eli and yet she found herself wanting to be closer to his sister. There had to be some kind of ethical rule against that, right? _

_Jessie awkwardly broke the silence, "So Eli and I are playing ball tomorrow. You should come." _

"_I wouldn't miss it." _

_--_

Jessie sighed before putting the diary underneath her bed once more. The ever present memories flooded to the surface. Everything she had tried so hard to forget. She knew the events of that summer would always remain. It would forever be with her. She had at least been able to ignore it until now. Everything seemed a lifetime ago when in reality it had only been the summer before her freshman year. Three years had passed and the brunette still had the same effect on her behind closed doors.

She knew things would be different between them if there was of restoring their previous friendship. They had spent so much time hating one another. Could they possibly overcome their differences?

"God … Eli… I need you." She exasperatedly whispered to no one.

-- Special Thanks to "Kiloriley" for your assistances. Greatly appreciated!! I owe you big.


End file.

Once and Again, Angst, Romance