Once and Again A Thousand Years

Sorry, if my English is not very good, but it's not my first language and I just don't want to play with searching for some beta, so if it bothers you, just don't read.

FULL SUMMARY: "What if?" is the worst question to be asking yourself. Eli knows that pretty well, so when stuffs are weird between him and Grace, and people (like Jesse) start to notice, he decides to find the answer. But every action has a reaction and Eli's decisions puts shaken-up Grace's life into jeopardy. She's an actress on the stage, but what happenes when silent makes her and not only her act also in real world. How can one moment change the lifes of everyone around.

Story starts before the talk Eli and Grace have in "The Awful Truth" (I've wrote my version of it), wonders aroung "Tough Love" and than takes on after "Experience Is The Teacher" (since second chapter) as my total AU. The changes in the plot before "EITT" it is that Eli and Grace heven't spoken to each other since the play and Karen never had mental breakdown or an accident. During the story I may mention some past events that weren't really there in the series.

Suggestions are more than welcome, though I can't promise I'll use any.

O&A~O&A~O&A~O&A~O&A

_So, what about tomorrow?_ – she asked hopefully._ Sure. Sure, it's fine._ – he replied nonchalantly._ So… if I knocked on your door, lets say around this time?_ – Grace's voice was unshure._ I'd let you in._ – Eli decided after a moment.

Today is tomorrow.

Grace was sitting in the kitchen alone, thinking what she's going to say to Eli.

Sure, Jesse was right. It's been weird between her and her so called 'stepbrother' ever since the wedding. Among people they would goof around and laugh all the time, but the truth was – they were afraid of being alone.

She slowly got up from the counter and made her way to the garage, that was now Eli's space. She softly knocked on his door twice and was surprised, when instead of just telling her to come in, Eli appeared at the doorstep.

'Oh, it's you' – he sounded surprised.

'Yeah. We were supposed to talk today' – she reminded him. – 'You know, to prove we're not afraid to be alone behind closed doors' – Grace laughed nervously.

'I remember. Just got caught in playing and forgot what time it is' – he sounded weird.

'So can I come in, or are we talking in the doorway to be safe?'

'No. Please, get in' – Eli replied shaking his head. He moved a little to let her in, but not enough for her to freely walk in without brushing her body against his. – 'So, we're gonna play small talks, or there's a patricular topic?'

Eli was still facing the door that he just closed oh-so-slowly. Grace scanned his tensed back and swallowed the lump that formed in her throat.

'I dunno' – she said seriously. – 'Is there something that's bothering you since the wedding?'

'Well, it is kinda' weird, don't ya think?' – he finally turned around to face her. – 'I guess I never thought that they would actually marry'.

'Yeah, I guess. But that's not what I'm talking about…' – she trailed off.

'I know' – he admitted dropping his gaze. – 'We should talk 'bout the almost-kiss'

'Right. But like you said – almost, and this is the key word'.

'Isn't the ALMOST part the actual problem?' – Eli asked with this weird look in his eyes, that made him look like that goodboy-basketball player he was when they met not so long ago, than now seemed like ages.

'What do you mean?' – Grace was confused.

'ALMOST lives place for "what if". That's never good question' – he stated walking to her. – 'We're unable to move on when we ask ourselves that. Don't you think?'

'I honestly don't know. You've got me all confused' – she admitted. – 'Can't you just tell me exactly what's on your mind'.

For a moment he looked at her as if he were putting together some real big numbers in his head. When he spoke again, you could se that he's made some big decision.

'We should go for it and have this one kiss done so we can get over it' – Eli blurred out.

'What?!' – Grace couldn't believe her own ears. – 'Are you out of your mind?'

'No, listen. I thought about it. That's the only way to find out what was that impuls to kiss about. Was it just because of Carla or maybe something more.'

'I don't know…'

'Well, we can't just stay the way it is. It makes it impossible to live together'

'Okay, you're right. Just get on with it' – Grace finally agreed.

The truth was, she dreamed about kissing Eli Sammler since day one. No matter who he or she was dating, that was the only thing on her mind. Carla was right – she did wanted to have Eli all to herself under her roof, she was just afraid that without Carla they wouldn't even be friends.

But that was it. His face moved closer to her just like that day, only this time there was no Jesse or anyone else in the house to interrup them. She could feel his hot breath on her face that smelled somehow unique – just him. His mouth covered hers in a kiss that simmed so innocence, but quickly grew wilder. His tongue begged for entrance, that she willingly granted. Grace was sure that this was the best moment of her life.

Just that it ended to soon. Eli slowly pulled back and searched for her eyes. For a moment Grace thought she saw in his face something, that she hoped to see for so long, but it was quickly gone.

' See' – he laughed. – 'We did it and nothing happened. No angel music, the world didn't stop to stare'

'Yeah' – she nodded, still having troble to find her voice.

'So now there is no "what if". We can just move on' – Eli said taking a step back. – 'We'll just be perfect step-brother and sister'.

Grace's heart dropped to the floor. That was not the colnclusion she came up with, but she couldn't possibly tell him that now. She decided that stuffs would have to get normal like before. All that she knew right now was that she could't bear lose him. She would be his friend, sister or whatever he wanted, just to keep him close.

'Well, how about I go fix us some lunch than' – Grace proposed and left the room quickly. The momnet the door shut behind her she allowed one lonely tear to roll down her cheek

Eli dropped to the floor as soon as Grace walked out. He knew too damn well that neither of them meant what they said, but this could never survive. If Rick and Lily found out they would put them trough hell and probably divorce, and Eli just could't do that to his dad. Things often got messy with them, but he loved him and couldn't risk his happiness like that.

Besides he wasn't good for her anyway. She was this golden girl with amazing future ahead and he was a loser that lived in the garage apartament of his dad's new wife's house, with some lame job and zero chance in ever getting better, not mentioning his addiction.

He was sure that this choice was the right one for the hole Sammler-Manning family.

_Few weeks later…_

Grace was crying in her pillow. Her mother was downstairs cleaning after the post-play party. All guest were gone and Grace finally allowed herself to disapper and cry out her sadness and frustration.

Yesterday Eli didn't came to the play, 'cause he was screwing someone in his garage apartament. In the bed, that only few hours after, she slept in. She hoped that this night changed something, but now she knew she was wrong. He promissed that he would come to the last show, but he just lied to her.

Grace's lie to August was pretty obvious. Nothing that he had said changed her perfomance. It changed, 'cause it was real for her now. Every single word. It wasn't about some Shakespeare kings and lovers anymore. She finally realized the truth about Eli and the script of the play became her life monologue with tears that came from her heart.

"_I will weep. (…)have I not cause to weep? (…)His very hair is of the dissembling colour. (…)his kisses are Judas's own children. I' faith, his hair is of a good colour. (…) And his kissing is as full of sanctity as the touch of holy bread. (…) But why did he swear he would come this morning, and comes not? (…) there is no truth in him."_

-William Shakespeare _As You Like It_


End file.

Once and Again, Family, Romance