Harry Potter 1. Prologue

**The idea has been floating around in my head for a while, and I thought I'd write it now. Only the prologue for now, I'm afraid, but you can expect updates soon :D**

**Remus/Sirius of course, so if you love Wolfstar then this is definitely for you ;)  
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**Here's the prologue:  
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**Prologue  
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Friends.

Very difficult to come by a real friend, and when you do, you usually end up letting them go at some point or another. Sometimes they hurt you or betray you. Sometimes they lie to you.

But when you find a true friend, you know they're the real deal.

Best friends, however, are different.

When you meet your best friend, you know instantly that they will be there for you whatever the cost. You can trust them with anything, you can tell them anything, and they won't judge you. They'll love you forever.

Best friends are the rarest and most extraordinary finds in our world, and to lose someone who you consider a best friend, is devastating.

When friendship blossoms, it can grow into many things. One of those, is love.

Falling in love with your best friend is dangerous, and could completely end the friendship, but love is about taking risks...

But would you risk it all? Would you risk an amazing friendship on something that might never happen?

Would you fall for your best friend?

**###**


	2. The Dream

**Sorry it's been a while. But the chapter's here now! Yay! ;D**

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**The Dream  
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The sheets were wet, and so were his pyjamas. He swallowed hard and scrunched his eyes shut, hoping that just by closing his eyes, it would make him forget everything. No such luck.

He could still feel everything that had happened in his dream; the touches, the kisses, the sex. It was a wonderful feeling, but it was also completely wrong, and that's what scared him.

He shakily lifted his hand up to the bedside table and grabbed his wand. "Scougify," he mumbled, pointing the wand at the wet sheets. Instantly, they were clean, as were his pyjamas. He placed his wand back on the bedside table and sighed, leaning back against the headboard of his bed.

_I'm screwed_, he thought miserably.

**##**

Remus made his way downstairs quickly and quietly, not bothering to wake his friends up. He felt as though he needed to tell somebody about his dream, and his friends _definitely_ weren't the right people to talk to. He'd die before telling them.

He reached the common room, and scanned the room for the person he was looking for, but he couldn't see her.

Without hesitation, he headed out of the common room and downstairs towards the library. He gave Madame Pince a smile as he came in, and walked to the usual table Lily Evans sat at. Voila – she was there.

"Lily," Remus said in relief, sitting down opposite her. She looked up from the work she was doing and smiled when she saw who it was, pushing the books aside.

"Hey Remus," she said. "How are you?"

"I'm... great," he lied, feeling nervous at the very thought of talking about his dream.

She gave him the 'yeah, I don't think so' look, and raised her eyebrows.

"Okay fine," Remus said quietly, looking down at his hands. "I came to you to speak to you about something."

"What is it?" she asked.

"You have to promise you won't repeat this to anyone though, Lily," Remus said. "I can't have anybody finding out."

Lily smiled and squeezed his hand. "You know I wouldn't tell."

"Right, I know... just wanted to make sure."

"It's alright," Lily said. "So what's up?"

Remus let out a nervous sigh and nodded. "I had a... dream."

"Judging by the redness of your face, you had a sex dream," Lily commented, blushing slightly. Remus laughed and nodded.

"Am I that easy to read?"

"No," Lily said. "I'm just observant. So what happened in this dream?" Her face reddened. "No! I don't really mean that! I don't want to know the details, I just mean why do you need to speak to me about it?"

"It's not about the dream itself," Remus said slowly. "It's about the person I was with in my dream."

"What's wrong with the person?"

"It wasn't exactly... a g-girl," Remus said, closing his eyes and trying to push away the thoughts coming back to him.

Lily's eyes widened and she pursed her lips. "Oh. So you're gay then?"

The word was just so...

He couldn't even describe it. _Gay_. Sure, it wasn't as bad as _werewolf_, but people treated them similar. _I'm not gay_, he thought. _It was just one stupid, but admittedly erotic and excit- NO REMUS! No, it's wrong and inappropriate. I'm not gay!_

"No, I'm not g-gay," Remus said, trying to look defiant. "I just had a dream. About a boy. I don't even know why."

"Did you enjoy it?" Lily asked.

"Of course not!" Remus said, resulting in a loud _shhh_ from Madame Pince.

Lily looked sceptical. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure! I didn't enjoy it one bit." _Liar_, he thought as an afterthought.

"Then why are you speaking to me?" Lily asked quietly, leaning closer to him. "I'm pretty sure you liked it. I mean, the way you're talking. You're worried because you thought you were straight, and you may even still do, but you've realised now that somewhere inside – some unconscious thoughts are seeping to the surface, and you're scared."

"Wow, you're good," Remus whispered. "I _must_ be easy to read."

"Like I said, I'm observant," Lily smiled. "But seriously, Remus. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being gay. Sure, it's new and scary, but if you're unconsciously having thoughts about boys... well, there isn't much you can do about it."

"You're supposed to make me feel better," Remus groaned. "I don't _want_ to be gay! Don't you think I'm already different enough? Can't I just be normal?"

"Being gay isn't abnormal," Lily said. "It's just a sexual orientation. Maybe you aren't gay, but don't push it aside like it's something to be afraid of. If you really are gay, then I know that one day you'll stop fighting it and you'll find someone who loves you for being a werewolf – a special guy. You _will_, Remus! Don't look at me like that. You're a catch."

Remus laughed and stared at Lily in disbelief. "A catch? What, a nerdy could-be-gay werewolf? Sure, I'll have people lining up all the way to Hogsmeade and back."

"Stop putting yourself down," Lily said. "Maybe the guy you like will fall for you."

"The guy I like?" Remus asked, staring at her as though she was insane. "I don't like anybody... in _that_ way."

"Well if you're having sexy dreams about a guy, then surely you must like him," Lily said teasingly. "Come on, who was it?"

Remus sighed. "I don't like him in that way," he said. "Well, at least... I really don't think I do... I haven't thought about it – not until last night anyway."

"Tell me who it was," Lily urged. "Maybe I could help."

"Lily, please promise me you won't tell."

"I promise."

"It was... Sirius," Remus said, feeling his cheeks grow hotter again.

Lily smiled. "I thought it would be," she said. "You two _do_ have chemistry."

"Chemistry? Remus said. "We're best friends. Of course we have chemistry."

"Well in my opinion, there's something more there. But if you don't want to believe me, you don't have to," Lily said. "Okay Remus. You had a dream about your best friend. You're confused. I can now see why it wasn't him you went to for help," she laughed. "I think you have two options."

"Two options?"

"Yes. Number one: just completely push it from your mind and pretend you never dreamt it. Although, you may have another dream which will just make things complicated. _Or_, number two: you could talk to him about it. You never know, maybe you _do_ really like him somewhere deep inside, and it would be a shame to ignore it and never get a chance with him."

"I want a chance with him," Remus said, not even thinking about what he was saying. He hadn't even realised that he wanted a chance with Sirius until the words were out of his mouth.

"Then go for it," Lily said. "He's your best friend. Even if he doesn't feel the same way, I'm pretty sure he'll be nice about it. I doubt it'll mess up your friendship."

"But-"

"Look Remus, I have to go or else I'll be late, but think about this; if you go for it and he doesn't feel the same way, at least you'll know. If you don't go for it, you'll never know, which means you'll never get your chance."

With that, she patted him comfortingly on the arm and collected her books. "Think about it," she said as she left the library.

Remus stood up and ran his fingers through his hair. _Right, I'm even more confused now_.

**###**


	3. Feelings

**Eh, it's been a while! I hope you can forgive me XD**

**Thanks for all of the awesome reviews for the first two chapters. I hope you like the next chapter :)  
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******Feelings**

Remus made his way to the dungeons for Potions, thinking over and over what Lily had said to him. The idea of being gay didn't exactly scare him – it just gave him another reason to stand out, which was not what he wanted. Also, of all of the boys at Hogwarts to have "feelings" for, it _had_ to be Sirius Black of all people. The thought made him uneasy.

He thought of the options that Lily had proposed; either ignore the dream but risk having more, or speak to Sirius about it. Both thoughts made his stomach turn. He didn't want any more of those dreams. He'd rather deal with the reason he'd had it in the first place, and that meant speaking to Sirius.

What would Sirius say?

He wasn't sure how Sirius – or any of his friends for that matter – felt about gay people. What would they do to him if they found out? He was brought out of his thoughts with a clap on the shoulder. He turned around and rolled his eyes.

"What was _that_ for?" he asked James, who was wearing a big grin.

"That was my way of saying good morning," he replied. "Since you never waited around for us!"

"Oh," Remus said. "Sorry. I was just asking Lily for some help on my homework," he lied.

"I see," James said, trying to act calm. "So, did she mention me?"

"No," Remus said. "Funnily enough, she doesn't talk about you very much."

"I wonder why?"

"Maybe because you're a stalker," Remus grinned, receiving a nudge in the ribs.

"Not fair," James said. "I'm not a _stalker_. I just love her, and I need her to realise that we're supposed to be together."

"Good luck with that," Remus said. "Seriously, good luck."

James rolled his eyes and smiled. "I know I'll convince her. Mark my words, me and Lily will get married one day."

Remus nodded, and decided not to say anything. They neared the classroom and stood outside with the rest of the class. Lily was already there, smiling at Remus, who wished more than anything that she would stop being so happy about his problem. It wasn't something to be happy about – it was a disaster.

"Come in, come in," Professor Slughorn said as he opened the door. "Partner up. We're doing love potions today which will require a lot of concentration and help from another person. Choose your partners wisely."

Remus groaned and stood alone at the side of the classroom while he waited for the last person to pick him. He never got picked as a partner, as he was terrible at potions. As expected, he was standing all alone while everybody else had a partner.

"Hmm, you can make a three with Black and Pettigrew when they turn up," Slughorn said off-handedly. "Page 122, get started!"

After a couple of minutes, the doors slammed open, Sirius and Peter tumbling into the room looking red-faced and out of breath.

Remus' heart fluttered at the sight of Sirius. _You see him every day, stop acting like this,_ he told himself sternly, but he couldn't help thinking about his dream as he watched Sirius get up gracefully and run a hand through his hair with that winning smile of his...

"Why are you two late?" Professor Slughorn asked them.

"It was Peeves," Peter said. "He wouldn't let us through. He kept throwing pencils at us!"

"I highly doubt that," Slughorn said. "Ten points from Gryffindor!"

"But it was Peeves!" Sirius insisted, but the glint in his eyes told otherwise. Obviously Professor Slughorn could see through this, so chose to ignore him.

"Get to work! Black, Pettigrew, you're working with Mr. Lupin over here," Slughorn said.

Remus joined them quickly and tried to ignore the weird feelings he was getting when he looked at Sirius.

"So..." Remus said to them. "Where were you really?"

"You'll see later," Sirius said mischievously. "At dinner."

"Oh no," Remus said, rolling his eyes. "Let me guess. Something to do with the Slytherins – Snape in particular – and spiked juice. Right?"

Sirius and Peter stared wide-eyed at him.

"How'd you know?" Peter asked.

"It's pretty obvious," Remus said, pointing towards the potions book. "Page 122, you'd better get started."

Sirius flipped the book open and sighed. "Guess I'll be making this all by myself," he said. "No offence, you guys, but you'll probably blow it up or something."

Remus and Peter exchanged glances and stepped away from Sirius and the cauldron, just to be safe. Remus wished he could be as good as potions as James or Sirius. They did it with so much ease, they made it look so simple.

He watched as Sirius stirred the potion clockwise, then anti-clockwise, then clockwise. He tossed a few ingredients into the cauldron, and waited for a moment before bringing it to the boil and then stirring again. Remus watched as Sirius leaned over the desk to grab something – he wasn't sure what, as he was too busy staring at something else...

_NO_, _Remus. He's your BEST FRIEND for Merlin's sake. Even if he does have a nice arse... I did not think that! I can't believe this. Oh god, he's looking at me. HE'S LOOKING AT ME! Merlin, Merlin, Merlin. His eyes... crap! What's happening to me?_

"You okay, Moony?" Sirius asked him, breaking him out of his thoughts.

"Uh, yeah sure," Remus said. "Why?"

"You look a bit ill," Sirius said, looking at him with worry.

"I'm not ill," Remus said. _Liar. You're sick, SICK! He's a guy! He's SIRIUS BLACK. No._

Sirius placed a hand on Remus' forehead, and Remus felt an excited fluttering in his stomach at the touch. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the feel of Sirius' hand against his skin, and then it was gone.

"Maybe you should go to the hospital wing, Rem?"

"No, I mean it. I'm fine," Remus said. "Look."

He headed towards the potion that Sirius had been brewing and Sirius pulled him back immediately. "No way!" he said. "I spent _ages_ making that and I won't let you ruin it."

"I wasn't going to _ruin_ it," Remus said defensively.

"You probably were," Peter said. "You usually ruin potions."

"Oh, shut up," Remus groaned, stepping back.

**##**

"So who are _you_ going to use your batch of love potion on?" Sirius asked Remus as they left the classroom with the small vials in their hands. Remus hadn't intended to even use his.

"Nobody," he said. "I don't like the idea of love potions."

"Why not? You could get _anybody_ you wanted!"

"Maybe I don't want anybody," Remus said. "And when I _do_ want someone, I won't use a love potion on hi- her."

Sirius shrugged. "I'm not using mine yet anyway. I'll save it for that special girl."

"Right," Remus said bitterly, feeling his stomach turn at the thought of Sirius kissing a girl.

"I'm using mine on Evans," James said, coming up behind them. "Just you wait. One drop and she'll be all over me."

"I don't think so, Potter," Lily said, grabbing his vial of love potion and throwing it against the wall so it smashed and its content spilled on the floor.

"Shame, Prongs," Sirius said, grinning.

"Can I use yours, Remus?" James whined.

"Not if you're going to use it on Lily, which I know you will," Remus said. James turned his attention to Sirius.

"Padfoot, you know I let you stay at my house..."

"Yes, I do."

"Well, let me use your love potion, _please_? You don't need a love potion anyway. All the girls want to date you. Why not give it to a friend in need?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and handed James the love potion. "Just so you know, mate. I don't think Evans will want to be with you even _with_ a love potion. She _hates_ you."

Peter sniggered, and received a glare from James.

"We'll see," James said, grinning down at the love potion in his hand. "I'm just going to find Evans. See you guys later."

With that, he ran down the corridor that Lily had gone down and disappeared from sight.

"He's mad," Peter said. "Seriously mad."

"Tell me about it," Sirius said. "So, the prank! Later when we-"

Remus tuned out of the conversation. Being with Sirius, watching him, talking to him, looking into his eyes – Remus wondered how on Earth he hadn't noticed his feelings before. He was mad about Sirius. Never, would he have thought he'd want to kiss his best friend, but that was all that seemed to be filling his mind and he couldn't get rid of the feeling.

He subtly glanced at Sirius. His lips looked so kissable and Remus had to force his eyes away after a moment, so nobody would notice.

"What do _you_ think, Remus?" Peter asked him.

"Eh?"

"Were you even listening?" Sirius asked, raising his eyebrows.

"No. I mean, kinda. I don't know, sorry. I need to go."

"Where are you going?" Sirius asked.

"Upstairs," Remus said quickly.

"AH!" Sirius smirked. "I know why you're going upstairs."

"Why?" Remus asked, feeling slightly nervous. He wasn't planning on going upstairs – he was planning to have another talk with Lily. What could Sirius be thinking?

"Oh come on! Going upstairs in the middle of the day with a face as red as yours is right now," Sirius said in amusement. "Someone needs to cool off a bit."

"What?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Have a wank."

Remus flushed bright red and ran a hand through his hair. "No! I need to get on with some... arithmancy homework that I forgot about."

"Right..." Sirius said. "Of course you do. Just admit it – we all do it."

Remus tried not to picture Sirius running upstairs to the dormitory to "cool off" during the day. The thought alone was already turning him on.

"I'll just be going then..."

He walked off quickly, making sure that nobody was following him.

One thing was for sure – he no longer needed to talk to Lily. Sirius was right. He needed to "cool off", and straight away.

**###**


	4. Nerves

**Thanks for the reviews as always. Muchly appreciated ;D **

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**Nerves  
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"Have fun cooling off eh, Moony?" Sirius winked when Remus entered the common room later that night.

"I was doing my arithmancy homework!" Remus said, trying not to blush.

"You were _doing_ your arithmancy homework?! You have weird kinks, Rem. No offence."

"Oh, shut up," Remus said, rolling his eyes and sitting down next to Sirius. "Your mind is way too dirty."

Sirius grinned and shrugged. "Well, what can I say? It's in my genes."

Remus raised his eyebrows and laughed. "Right."

"What are we talking about?" James asked as he came to join them on the sofas.

"Remus was having a wank," Sirius said quickly.

"I was _not_!" Remus replied, shrinking back into his chair. James looked slightly amused.

"That's too much information, I'm afraid," he said, making a face. "Why do you even _know_ that, Sirius?"

"I can just tell. Sixth sense and all that," Sirius grinned.

"Seriously, guys," Remus said. "I didn't... do _that_. I was just finishing my homework. Jeez, you two are annoying."

"You love us really," Sirius said.

Remus tried not to blush and stood up. "Yeah, of course I do," he said in the most sarcastic voice he could summon. "I'll see you guys later. I'm going to the library."

"HAVE FUN COOLING OFF IN THE LIBRARY," Sirius shouted after him, turning a lot of heads in the common room. Remus turned and shot him a furious look before promptly bolting out of the common room to avoid the amused stares from people.

**##**

"I thought I'd find you in here," Remus said to Lily as he sat down next to her in the library. She smiled.

"How are things with your... Sirius problem?"

Remus bit his lip. "I think my dream was trying to tell me something."

"And what's that?" Lily asked eagerly.

"I'm kind of mad about him," Remus said quietly, looking at his hands. "I don't know how I didn't realise before. Now everything's so much more complicated, though. I blush at the most unnecessary times, and he keeps making jokes about me heading up to the room to... you know, cool off... which makes me blush even more. God Lily, I'm scared he's going to find out and hate me!"

"Remus, you're just over-analysing things," Lily said patiently. "He won't figure it out. He's a guy. No offence, but guys aren't exactly perceptive when it comes to things like this. You just need to figure out what _you_ want to do."

"I really don't know!"

"Do you think that there's any chance he might like you back?" Lily asked.

"No," Remus said sadly. "I mean, why would he?"

Lily smiled and rolled her eyes. "You are an amazing person, you know that Remus? You really are. Anybody would be _lucky_ to be with you. Don't give me that look – it's true! You're the most wonderful, kind, honest and loving person I know. I bet you that if Sirius Black is gay, _you're_ the one he wants."

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Right. If you say so. You're delusional, by the way, but Sirius is definitely not gay."

"How do you know that for sure?" Lily challenged. "I mean, have you actually asked him?"

"Oh, sure," Remus said sarcastically. "'Hi Sirius, I was just wondering if you're gay?' Somehow, that might sound a bit dodgy."

"Okay," Lily said, ignoring his sarcasm. "You could find a way to slip homosexuality into the conversation, and casually ask his opinion on it. Maybe mention that you used to know somebody who was gay, and ask him if he knows anyone. I don't know. You need to at least know how he feels about it."

"What if he's homophobic?" Remus asked. "He is a pureblood. Aren't they all really prejudiced?"

"You know he's not like the rest of them," Lily said. "He's your best friend. I'm sure he'll accept you for who you are even if he's a tad homophobic. Really, something as small as that can't break a friendship like yours. You two are... you're special."

Remus smiled. "You think so?"

"Yes," Lily replied. "Definitely. He cares about you a lot. Everybody can see that, and I wouldn't be surprised if it _did_ turn out that he feels the same way."

Remus liked the sound of that, but he chose to push it aside; he didn't want to get his hopes up for nothing.

"Honestly Lily, what do you think I should do? I mean – if you were in my situation – what would you do?"

Lily pondered this for a moment. "If it were me, I think I'd tell him how I feel."

"I don't know how to even go about telling him, though," Remus groaned. "And I'm getting nervous just at the _thought_ of him knowing."

"Do you want to be with him?" Lily asked.

Remus nodded.

"Well, you're never going to be with him if you don't at least tell him how you feel. I promise you'll feel better once it's out. Even if he doesn't feel the same way, it'll be a weight lifted. You know? Remus, you don't have to do it but I think it would be a good idea. It's up to you."

"How do I tell him?" Remus asked. "Without it being awkward or weird?"

"It will be awkward no matter what," Lily said. "It always is when you tell somebody that you like them."

"I'm so nervous," Remus said, his heart beating fast at the thought of telling Sirius.

Lily took hold of his hand and squeezed it comfortingly. "You have nothing to be nervous about. I promise you it won't be as bad as you're imagining."

"Right, okay," Remus said, standing up quickly. "I think I'll go. If I don't do it right now, then I don't think I'll ever do it. Wish me luck."

Lily grinned. "Oh, good luck! Tell me what happens."

"I will," Remus said as he left the library, his nerves building up more and more with every step he took.

**##**

Remus opened the door to the dormitory slowly, peering inside. He saw James' curtains shut, and Peter was finishing up some work. Sirius was levitating a piece of screwed up parchment with his wand and letting it drop so it nearly hit his face, but catching it again in levitation before it could do so. Remus rolled his eyes and walked towards Sirius.

"Ah," Sirius said. "He's back."

"I... Sirius? Can we, er, talk?"

"Sure," Sirius said. "What's up?"

"I mean in private," Remus said quietly, looking nervously at Peter and then back at Sirius who now looked a mixture of intrigued and concerned.

"Okay," Sirius said. "Astronomy Tower?"

"Yeah," Remus said, his mouth feeling dry. Sirius gave him a strange look but got up from his bed and headed towards the door, with Remus following close behind.

They didn't say much on the way up to the Astronomy Tower, and when they reached there, Sirius looked at Remus expectantly.

Remus gave a nervous laugh and sat down next to Sirius. "It doesn't really matter, actually. Don't worry about it."

"You dragged me all the way up here to chicken out?" Sirius asked, raising an eyebrow. "You can trust me. You _know _that."

Remus let out a breath and closed his eyes. It was now or never.

"I had a dream," he said slowly. "A really weird dream. It made me realise some things about myself that I never knew before, but now that I know them, I can't get rid of the thoughts."

Sirius looked slightly confused. "Carry on..."

"I don't want you to think any differently of me after I tell you," Remus said quickly. "Please promise me you won't hate me."

"I promise," Sirius said. "I couldn't hate you, you're my best friend."

Remus smiled slightly and nodded.

"Hey, Remus," Sirius said softly, looking at him in worry. "I _promise_. You look really nervous, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Remus replied, taking in a deep breath and looking directly into Sirius' eyes. "In my dream, I was with... a guy. We were doing... _stuff_. Sirius, I think I m-might be gay."

Sirius looked shocked. He spent about ten seconds just staring at Remus with his mouth hanging open, before he spoke. "Wow, that's... not what I expected."

Remus nodded, feeling sick. "Do you hate me?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "No," he said. "I don't hate you. Don't be such a fool. I wouldn't hate you for being gay."

Remus let out a sigh of relief and smiled. "Thank you."

"It's okay," Sirius grinned, ruffling Remus' hair and leaning back against the wall. "So what were you and this mysterious dream guy doing, exactly? Having a little fun under the covers, were you?" Sirius smirked.

"You wouldn't want to know," Remus said, pursing his lips.

"Ha! So you were! What did he look like? Wait! Do you have a crush on anybody at Hogwarts?"

Remus had known Sirius would ask the question eventually, but he still wasn't ready to answer it.

"I... maybe... yes."

"Oh man, this is good," Sirius said. "Who is it?"

"I'm not telling you that," Remus replied.

"Come on! There's no need to be nervous. I mean unless it's _me_ who you fancy, because, yeah I can understand why you'd be nervous about telling me then, but please tell me!"

Remus really wished his face would stay one colour, but unfortunately he could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. Sirius noticed, and nodded with a slight smile.

"It's me, isn't it?"

Remus couldn't do anything but nod.

**###**


	5. Teasing

**Ah, your reviews made me smile :D Thank you everyone!**

**I hope you like this chapter, even though it's slightly shorter (sorry)!  
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**Teasing  
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Sirius looked slightly shocked, but let out a quiet laugh. "Well damn," he said, running a hand through his hair. "Damn."

"You don't want to talk to me anymore, do you? It's okay, I understand," Remus said quickly, feeling the heat rising to his cheeks as Sirius kept looking at him in awe.

"Oh come on, Remus," Sirius said. "There's nothing wrong with you fancying me, really. Everyone fancies me. I'm Sirius Black."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Of course."

"Hey, I'm serious. Don't laugh," he said, his eyes narrowing. "I _am_. I mean it. I'm glad you told me. I'm really flattered. It's nice to know that someone likes me for more than just my looks, because, let's be honest, all of those girls who are "in love" with me don't know the first thing about me."

"But you don't feel the same way, do you?" Remus asked, trying not to let Sirius know how nervous he was.

"I'm... well, you know that I'm not... you know," Sirius said, looking sympathetic. "I'm straight."

Remus nodded. "Yeah, I know. I just hoped. It's fine."

Sirius smiled and shook his head. "No, it's not fine. I'm sorry. Nobody deserves that, and I wish I could help you."

"Don't worry about it, Sirius," Remus said quietly. "You're a great friend. Thank you so much for understanding.

Sirius stared at him for a moment before pulling him for a hug. It took Remus a moment to relax into the hug, and then he let a smile make its way to his face.

When they pulled apart, Remus was greeted with a smirk from Sirius.

"What?" Remus asked.

"Oh, nothing."

"Tell me," Remus urged desperately. Sirius just continued on smirking.

"You had a dream about me, huh?" he said. "So... tell me. What happened exactly?"

Remus flushed and let out an embarrassed cough. "Nothing."

"Sure," Sirius said. "You said we were doing _stuff_. What does _stuff_ consist of?"

"Use your imagination!" Remus said. "I know you have a dirty mind."

"Oh!" Sirius said, waggling his eyebrows. "So it _was_ something dirty... interesting, Moony. Never knew you were like that."

"Shut up," Remus murmured, looking away. "Let's just go back to the dorm."

"Fine," Sirius said. "But Rem. In all seriousness, I'm okay with it. Don't feel like it's changed our relationship or anything."

Remus smiled at him and nodded. "You're the best."

"I know, right?" Sirius said with a grin.

**##**

Over the next few days, Remus figured that Sirius was enjoying Remus' crush a lot more than he let on. At first he thought he was just being paranoid, but he started to realise that Sirius was doing things to purposely turn Remus on.

Remus tried very hard to ignore it, but he was with Sirius too much to ignore it all of the time. He just hoped that James and Peter wouldn't notice Sirius' obvious change in behaviour towards Remus.

He wasn't exactly annoyed that Sirius was acting differently – the opposite actually. He loved it when Sirius bent over in front of him or touched him in unnecessary places, but sometimes he felt like it was leading him on too much and it would hurt more when Sirius finally gave up on his teasing.

"Hey Remus, are you okay?" James asked, snapping Remus out of his thoughts.

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"Peter just ate all of your chocolate and you haven't even told him off."

Remus' eyes widened and he glared at a very chocolate-faced Peter Pettigrew, who shrunk back in his chair and shrugged helplessly. "I was hungry!"

"Something else on your mind, hm?" Sirius asked him.

"No. Nothing on my mind, _actually_," Remus said, sending Sirius an annoyed look. "Peter, you'd better buy me some more chocolate next time we go to Hogsmeade..."

Peter nodded quickly.

"Guys, I'm going to use my love potion on Lily today," James whispered.

"You really shouldn't," Remus said. "I mean, love should be natural. Not forced."

"Look, it's the only way I'll get her to be with me," James said. "I need to do it."

"It's still not right," Sirius said.

"_You're_ not right, Sirius," James said. "Not right in the head."

"Take that back, you git!" Sirius said, tossing a cushion at James, who ducked, sending the cushion at the back of Lily's head across the room. Sirius winced as she turned around.

"If that was you, Potter, I swear I'll-"

"It wasn't me!" James yelled, holding his hands up. "Blame Sirius!"

Lily looked dubious, but turned her attention to Sirius. "Black," she said angrily. "Do that again and I'll-"

"-I'm sorry, did you guys hear something?" Sirius said loudly, cutting her off. "Must have been my imagination. Come on guys, let's go."

They all followed him upstairs leaving Lily spluttering in the Common Room, looking furious. Remus had given her an "I'm sorry" look before departing with the others.

"I'm going for a shower," Sirius stated abruptly when they entered the dormitory, pulling his shirt off and throwing it at Remus.

Remus tried to tear his eyes away from Sirius' bare chest but found he couldn't, and he knew Sirius was watching him. Then, Sirius pulled his trousers off so that he was just walking around in his boxers. Remus closed his eyes and tried not to think about it.

"Hey Remus," Sirius said, making Remus open his eyes. Sirius was just inches away from him and Remus felt as though he couldn't breathe. "Pass me that towel, would you?"

"Mhm," Remus mumbled, grabbing the towel from the rack next to him and passing it to Sirius, all the while keeping his eyes on Sirius' chest and trying his hardest to refrain from lunging at him hungrily.

"You okay?" Sirius asked him.

"Mfff."

Sirius looked amused and smirked. "What was that? Mfff?"

"Uh," Remus mumbled, staring down at the evident bulge in Sirius' boxers.

Sirius followed his gaze, and Remus blushed furiously. "I think you need to cool off again."

"Uh huh."

"Have fun," Sirius said, turning on his heel and walking towards the bathroom door, looking back to wink at Remus before he disappeared behind the door.

Remus breathed out slowly, trying to stay calm.

"What was _that_ about?" James asked, looking slightly confused. "Was he _flirting _with you?"

"That's... that's disgusting, James!" Remus said quickly, pulling his curtains shut and closing his eyes.

He thought of Sirius. Sirius in the shower. Sirius naked. Sirius wet. Sirius in the shower, naked and wet...

He imagined what it would be like to be in there with him. Pressing up against him, touching him.

Letting out a soft moan, Remus moved his hand down under his boxers and immersed in images of Sirius.

**###**


	6. Firewhiskey

**Ah, your reviews were awesome. I hope you like this chapter! It was fun writing it :)**

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**Firewhiskey**

"Valentine's Day's coming up. Got your eye on anybody?" Sirius asked Remus as they sat in the common room one day.

"No," Remus said quickly, blushing. "You?"

"I might," Sirius replied, licking his lips. Remus tried to ignore the flicker of hope that instantly buried itself in his head. Of course Sirius wasn't talking about him.

"I'm asking Evans out for Valentine's Day," James said from next to them. "I have this feeling that she'll say yes this time."

"Optimism," Remus said. "Love it."

"I hate Valentine's Day," Peter muttered. "It's stupid."

"Just cos' you can't get yourself a girl," Sirius said.

"I don't really see you walking around with a girl, either," James pointed out.

"I could get any girl I want," Sirius huffed, winking at Marlene McKinnon, who happened to be walking past at that moment. She blushed and rushed towards her giggling friends in the corner. "See? I'm like, a sex god. Right Moony?"

Remus blinked and tried not to let himself blush. "You keep telling yourself that, Sirius."

"_PLEASE_," James said. "I'm the only sex god around here. Ask Joanne Knight. I gave her the best night of her life the other week there."

"Woah woah woah," Sirius said, eyes narrowing. "Joanne Knight? As in big-boobed Ravenclaw Joanne Knight?"

"The very one," James said with a proud grin.

"Well _you_ can ask her yourself, Prongs," Sirius said with a smirk. "I did her too, last year."

James spluttered. "_WHAT_?"

"Yup. She was lonely. I was there. And I'm sex on legs, too. I think that played a big part."

"While this conversation is so lovely and non-derogatory," Remus interrupted. "James, I thought you only had eyes for Lily?"

"A man has his needs," James said. "Besides, what I did with Knight was just to make her jealous."

"And I'm guessing it never worked?" Remus said.

"Unfortunately, no," James said. "But I'm not giving up. Evans will be mine, one way or another."

"It might help if you started calling her 'Lily', instead of 'Evans'," Sirius said unhelpfully.

"I'll start calling her Lily the day she agrees to go out with me," James said. "Speak of the devil, here she comes. I'll see you guys later."

James bounded off towards Lily, who had entered the common room and then proceeded to leave again after seeing James heading towards her. He stumbled out of the common room after her, and Sirius turned to Remus.

"Looks like you'll have to fix him up later," he said. "She's going to kill him."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Doesn't she always?"

Sirius shrugged and nodded. "Oy, Pete! Go and get us something from the kitchens, will you?"

"Why me?" Peter whined. "You always make me go."

"Fine, be like that," Sirius said. "Come on, Rem."

Remus stood up automatically. Any time alone with Sirius was time well spent. He wasn't going to pass it up. He followed Sirius out of the room.

"So what are we getting from the kitchens?"

"Maybe a butterbeer. Firewhiskey, if they have any. Is there anything you want?"

_You_, Remus thought desperately, trying not to look into his eyes for too long.

"Rem, are you okay?" Sirius asked, stopping in front of him.

"Yeah. Sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. No, there's nothing I really want," Remus replied.

"Lost in your thoughts, eh?" Sirius questioned. Remus already knew where this was going, and he wasn't complaining. "What were you thinking about?"

"Something."

"Or some_one_?" Sirius asked with a smirk. "Would that someone happen to be a certain 'sex on legs'?"

"Perhaps," Remus said quietly with a small smile.

"What were you thinking, exactly?" Sirius asked, leaning forwards. "What my lips would taste like? What they would feel like against yours?"

Remus felt as though his brain was going to explode because of the pure sexiness in Sirius's voice. His eyes were sparkling and his mischievous grin was almost enough to make Remus melt.

"I... uh... why would you think _that_? Maybe that's what _you've _been thinking about."

Sirius raised his eyebrows and laughed. "Maybe it is," he said simply, turning and heading down the corridor. "Come on, then. Kitchens."

Remus stared after him in frozen shock. _'Maybe it is'. _Had Sirius been thinking of kissing him? Remus couldn't move; his brain wouldn't function. All he could think about were Sirius's words. And Sirius's lips. Against his.

"Remus?"

Remus looked up at him. "Were you really thinking that?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Sirius's expression softened and he stepped forwards. "I've thought about it more than I'd care to admit," he said, blushing slightly. "But let's just keep that between us."

It took all of Remus's willpower to stop himself from grinning like an idiot. He managed a small smile and nodded. "Just us," he said.

Sirius nodded and rolled his eyes. "Look at you, turning this all soppy. Let's go and get some alcohol."

Remus laughed and followed him towards the kitchens. When they got inside, they were greeted by many over-enthusiastic house-elves.

"What can we get kind Sirs?" asked a particularly excited elf.

"Do you have any Firewhiskey?"

"Yes we do!" the elf squeaked, running off. He returned a minute later with two bottles of Firewhiskey and a smile. "Please drink responsibly, Sirs."

"Will do!" Sirius said, grabbing Remus by the arm and pulling him out of the kitchen.

"Thanks," Remus said quickly to the elf, who nodded in response. When they got back into the corridor, Remus turned to Sirius. "Ever think about where we'd drink this?"

"We can go out by the lake," Sirius said. "You know, that place you and Wormy found in second year?"

"Oh," Remus said. "Yeah, okay."

**##**

Remus couldn't help but find the whole thing romantic. It was sunset, and the sun was casting a brilliant orange light on the rippling waters of the lake. They were sitting on a patch of grass hidden by trees, just on the water's edge.

"Aren't you going to drink any?" Sirius asked, waving at the full bottle of Firewhiskey in Remus's hand.

"You know I don't drink," Remus said.

"I know," Sirius grinned. "So can I have your bottle?"

Remus rolled his eyes and handed the bottle over. "You didn't want the House Elves to think you were greedy, huh?"

"Pfft," Sirius said. "Greedy."

"Well, you are! And when you're stumbling all over the place, don't think I'll be carrying you up to the dorm."

"I know you want to," Sirius winked, taking a swig from his bottle. "You'll get to put your hands all over me..."

"Shut up, Sirius," Remus replied, blushing furiously.

**##**

An hour and two Firewhiskeys later, and Remus could say that Sirius was completely, and one-hundred percent drunk. He was swaying all over the place and his words were slurred.

"You know, if a teacher sees you – or even gets a whiff of you – you'll be in big trouble," Remus said to a grinning Sirius.

"Y'right," Sirius said. "M not e'en tha drunk."

Remus laughed. "Of course not."

"Ya sound so so sexy when ya laugh like tha," Sirius said, hiccupping loudly. Remus tried not to let Sirius's words have an effect on him. He was drunk. Nothing he was saying was true.

"That's very kind, Sirius," he said. "We should get going, though. It's getting dark."

"Maybe we should jus'stay ere," Sirius replied in a whiny voice. "I wanna spend time wi'you Remmiekins!"

"Oh god," Remus said. "Please don't ever call me that again."

Sirius ignored him and Remus jumped when Sirius's head was suddenly in his lap. He looked down at Sirius, who was staring up at him with a drunk smile on his face.

"Er, Sirius. I don't know if-"

"- You have beautiful eyes, Remmie."

"Uh, thanks," Remus said, running his hand through Sirius's hair. "S-so do you."

Sirius sat up and turned to face Remus. "I wanna kiss you... lemme kiss you _please_."

Remus breath hitched in his throat. He wanted to, more than anything, but he couldn't. Sirius was drunk. It would just make everything more awkward when he was sober.

"Sirius, we can't. You're drunk."

Sirius leaned forwards and wrapped his arms around Remus tightly. "Y'smell nice, like happy things n' nice things n' really sweet n' dorable."

Remus laughed and rolled his eyes. "I wish you really meant that."

"I do, Remmie," Sirius said. Sirius's lips were suddenly against Remus's neck, leaving a trail of kisses on his skin. Remus reluctantly pushed Sirius away and shuffled back.

"I can't, Sirius," he said quietly. "You wouldn't be doing this if you were sober. I can't."

"But-"

"-No, Sirius. Let's go. Come on," Remus said, reaching down to grab Sirius's hand and pull him up. Sirius stumbled and fell against Remus, who put an arm around him and guided him towards the castle.

"Mmm can I sleep in'ya bed tonight?" Sirius asked sleepily.

"I don't think so," Remus said. "Maybe some other time."

Sirius grinned goofily and nodded. "M lookin' forward to it."

"Me too," Remus whispered, and he really wondered if one day he actually would be with Sirius. Right now, it seemed very possible.

**###**


	7. Fairy Princess Potions

**I'm sooooooo incredibly sorry for the long wait. If anyone's still here, thanks for being so patient. I promise to update much quicker now though that my exams are over, so don't worry :) Thanks for all the reviews, as always! **

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**Fairy Princess Potions**

Remus woke up the next morning to the sound of groaning from Sirius's bed. At first, his head was filled with dirty thoughts, and then he remembered the alcohol from the night before and he realised that Sirius probably had a pretty bad hangover.

When he opened his bed curtains, he saw James leaning over Sirius's bed.

"What're you doing?" Remus asked James, who turned around looking slightly guilty.

"Nothing," he said quickly. "Just checking on Sirius. He's hungover."

Remus slid out of his bed and walked towards James. "Then why do you look so guilty?"

"Nothing," squeaked Peter from behind James, who Remus hadn't even noticed was there until now.

"You're _both_ acting really guilty," Remus said suspiciously, walking closer to Sirius's bed. "What's going on?"

James reluctantly moved to one side to let Remus past. Sirius was lying in his bed, looking a complete mess. When Sirius was Remus, he gave him a small smile and then leaned sideways over the bed to throw up in a bucket that someone had left there.

"What's up with you guys? What did you do?" Remus asked.

Sirius held up and empty vial, which he presumed had some sort of potion in it not long ago. Remus stared at James in confusion.

"Well," James said. "I made a potion for him."

"You _made_ a potion for him?" Remus asked. "What kind of potion?"

"He calls it James's Magnificent Sobering Potion," Peter said excitedly. "It was all multi-coloured too!"

"Wait, so you _made_ a potion and then Sirius actually drunk it?" Remus asked in horror, looking down at Sirius. "Do you know how dangerous that is?"

"I tested it out first!" James said defensively.

"On who?"

"A little eager first year that happened to be walking past," James said, with a guilty smile.

Remus closed his eyes and shook his head. "Wow," he said.

"Wow?" Peter questioned.

"You're so thick," Remus replied. "Firstly, you made a sobering potion for Sirius who isn't even drunk – he's hungover. Then, you tested it on a _first year_. A FIRST YEAR, JAMES! A first year who's never been drunk in his life, so your potion wouldn't work on him anyway!"

"You make a good point," James said, looking slightly embarrassed. "But in all fairness, I tested it on the first year just to make sure there were no side-effects."

"You know I'm a prefect, right?" Remus said angrily.

"But you would never put _us_ in detention," Peter said, looking frightened.

"I bet you'd like to put _me_ in detention," Sirius mumbled, with a strained smirk on his face.

James shot Sirius a weird look and then turned back to Remus. "I'm sorry, Remus. But it hasn't done anything to him anyway, so don't worry about it. We won't do it again."

"Promise?"

"We promise. Right, Wormy?"

"Yeah," Peter said quickly.

Sirius sat up in his bed abruptly and all colour drained out of his face. "Oh MERLIN, JAMES! WHAT HAVE YOU _DONE_ TO ME?!"

"What do you mean? You look fine!"

"There's something wrong," Sirius muttered, jumping out of bed. "Something's happening to me."

They all stared at Sirius, who was running around frantically, and then bolted into the bathroom and locked the door behind him.

"See?" Remus said. "There will always be consequences."

"Shut up," James said quietly. "It's Sirius. He's always being overly-dramatic. There's probably nothing wrong."

Remus and Peter looked at James sceptically, when a sudden loud high-pitched scream came from the bathroom.

"What the-" James started, but the scream came again.

"Was that Sirius?" Peter asked.

"JAMES FUCKING POTTER!" came Sirius's uncharacteristically high-pitched voice. "YOU AND YOUR MULTI-FUCKING-COLOUR FAIRY PRINCESS POTION!"

Peter gasped. "I think you turned him into a fairy!"

James slapped Peter in the arm and ran towards the bathroom door. "Sirius, open up. What happened to you?"

"NOTHING," Sirius shouted from inside the bathroom.

Remus stepped towards the bathroom and pressed his ear to the door. He could have sworn he could hear sobbing.

"He's crying," Remus mouthed to James, who looked nervous.

"I can't believe you turned Sirius into a fairy," Peter said, pacing back and forwards across the bedroom.

"I didn't turn him into a fairy," James said through gritted teeth.

Remus knocked on the door lightly. "Sirius?" he said softly. "Are you alright? What happened to you?"

"James's fucking awful damned crappy potion. I hate you, James Potter!" Sirius cried through the door, still in a very high-pitched voice.

"Please open the door," Remus said.

"No."

"If you don't open the door, we'll open it," James warned. "Just tell us what happened. Wait, you _aren't_ a fairy, are you?"

"I'm not a freaking fairy!" Sirius yelled.

"That's it," James said, losing his temper. "Move over, Remus. I'm opening this damned door."

"Don't," Remus said, pleadingly. "He's obviously upset about something."

"Well he's being a stubborn prat and not telling us what's going on!"

"Let me try to talk to him," Remus said. "He might talk to me. After all, I wasn't one of the idiots who gave him the potion."

James sighed and nodded, taking a step back with Peter.

"Hey Sirius? It's Remus. Please tell me what happened," Remus said quietly. "If you don't tell me, they're going to unlock the door."

"Don't wanna talk about it," came Sirius's voice from the other side of the door.

"Please?"

"Remus, it's horrible," Sirius said.

"Is he talking to you?" James whispered to Remus.

"Shh!" Remus said back, and then turned to the door again. "Sirius, what happened?"

"The damned potion turned me into a freaking girl."

Remus pursed his lips and tried not to laugh. That's why he suddenly had a high-pitched voice. "Sirius, I'm going to tell James and Pete, and we're going to help you."

"Uh huh," Sirius groaned from inside the bathroom.

"You turned him into a girl, James," Remus said.

James looked shocked. "I-what?!"

"So does he have boobs?" Peter asked with great interest.

"Uh, probably..."

"Do you think he'll let us touch em'?" James asked. "I don't know what he's complaining about. He has freaking tits! He can feel them up all he wants!"

"Oh come on," Remus said. "He's obviously embarrassed. We need to open the door, and you guys have to promise not to laugh at him."

"You mean 'her'," James said, falling about on the floor laughing.

"That's enough," Remus said, feeling slightly annoyed. "You know he doesn't find this funny, so stop laughing. He's pissed at you."

James sighed. "Fine."

"Hey, Sirius? Open the door. We promise we won't laugh," Remus said.

They heard the door unlock, and watched as the door slowly opened revealing a girl that very closely resembled Sirius. She had the same black hair, but longer. The same grey eyes. They were doing the exact same 'puppy-dog' expression.

Remus looked to James and Peter, who were obviously trying very hard not to laugh.

"Turn me back," Sirius said to James in a furious voice.

"I, uh... I don't know how," James said awkwardly.

"I'm not staying as a fucking girl forever!" Sirius shouted.

"Don't worry, we'll figure something out," Remus said quickly. He wondered how he could still be so attracted to Sirius even though he was now a girl. He'd expected his feelings to go away. After all, gay guys didn't find girls attractive, did they?

"You're sexy," Peter spluttered, staring at Sirius.

Remus felt a horrible twinge of jealousy at Peter's words.

"I've always been sexy," Sirius said matter-of-factly. "But you ain't getting any of this."

Peter coughed and turned around. "This is so weird," he mumbled.

"Have you felt yourself up yet?" James asked Sirius quickly. Peter turned around in interest.

"No," Sirius said.

"Well why not?!" James said in disgust. "Your tits are bigger than Joanne Knight's!"

"Maybe I'm too concerned about the fact that I'm a girl?" Sirius said angrily. "Where's the freaking cloak?"

Peter tossed the invisibility cloak towards Sirius, who threw it over himself. "Well," Sirius said. "Aren't we going to find a way to change me back?"

"Yeah, of course."

**##**

On their way down to the potions classroom, Remus was amused to find Sirius pulling the cloak off now and again to check himself out in different reflections.

"I'm so damned hot!" he said.

_Yes, you are_, Remus thought. _But not as hot as you are as a guy_.

"I swear you're mad," James said. "If it were me, I'd be upstairs getting some hot lesbian action on with Lily right now."

Remus raised his eyebrows at James. "Really?"

"Hell yeah!" James said.

"The very thought makes me want to puke," Sirius said. "Lily's not my type. Besides, you'd kill me if I got some hot lesbian action on with her."

"You could always get it on with Wormtail," James teased.

"That's disgusting," Sirius said, glaring at James. He put the cloak back on as he heard someone coming around the corner.

"Oh hey, Evans," James said as Lily appeared.

"Oh no," she groaned. "What do you want, Potter?"

"I want some hot lesbian action," he said. "Me and you."

Remus couldn't stop himself from bursting out laughing. Peter looked on the verge of doing the very same, and Lily looked utterly confused and amused at the same time.

"Potter," she said slowly. "With all due respect, you're not a girl."

"Yeah," he said dreamily. "But I can be if that's what you want."

Lily took a step back. "Uh, what's gotten into you?"

"James turned Sirius into a girl with this multi-coloured potion that he made by himself because Sirius was hungover and he wanted to feel better," Peter said quickly.

Lily's eyes widened. "You _made_ your own potion, and then Sirius drunk it?"

"That's exactly what I said," Remus said to Lily, who looked concerned.

"Where is he? Sirius."

Peter pulled the cloak off of Sirius, who scrambled to pick it back up again.

Lily grabbed the cloak before he could do so and held it behind her. "Oh, Sirius," she said, looking amused. "You make a lovely girl."

"Give me the damned cloak, Evans!"

"Just give it back to him," Remus said. "He doesn't want anyone to see."

"No," Lily said, with a mischievous smile. "I think after all the hell he's put me through, it's time to get even. Bye, Sirius."

She ran off with the cloak, and Sirius ran after her, only to come running straight back when he heard people around the corner.

"Take me to Slughorn's office NOW," Sirius shouted furiously.

James, Remus and Peter all tried to hide Sirius in between them as they slowly made their way towards Slughorn's office.

"Check around the corners," Sirius ordered James and Peter. When they walked ahead, Sirius turned to Remus.

"Since I'm technically a girl now," he said slowly. "It wouldn't be so bad if I kissed you."

Remus's eyes widened as Sirius leaned forwards to kiss him, but he pushed Sirius away. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "But if I ever get to kiss you, I want it to be _you_."

"This is me."

"You're a girl," Remus hissed. "It's not the same."

"But you're still attracted to me," Sirius replied. "I saw you staring at my boobs earlier."

"Um-"

"- Which means that you aren't gay," Sirius said triumphantly. "You're not attracted to _guys_, you're just attracted to _me_."

Remus blushed.

"Coast's clear," James whispered, and they carried on towards Slughorn's office. When they finally arrived, Professor Slughorn didn't even look confused.

"I've been expecting you," he said.

"You have?" Peter asked.

"A young first year came crying to me this morning because two certain mischievous older students had made him drink a multi-coloured potion they'd made by themselves, and it had turned him into a girl."

James and Peter exchanged worried looks. They knew they were going to be in trouble.

**##**

"How does it feel to be a guy again?" James asked Sirius, who was looking happier than ever now that he was back to himself.

"It feels awesome," he said. "Although I _do_ regret not feeling myself up."

"Are you still annoyed with me?" James asked.

"No," Sirius said, smirking. "But if you could make some more of that potion and slip it into Snivellus's drink, that would be amazing."

"Absolutely not!" Remus said. "You know how much trouble James and Peter are in."

"Aw, but it'd be so much fun," Sirius whined.

"Speaking of trouble," James said. "Come on, Peter. We have a detention to get to."

James and Peter slowly shuffled down the other corridor, leaving Sirius and Remus alone.

"Sorry about earlier," Sirius said. "I didn't... I mean, I don't know. It doesn't make any sense."

"Don't worry about it," Remus said quietly.

"Can I ask you something?" Sirius asked.

"Sure."

"Last night," he said. "Were you trying to kiss me?"

Remus snorted and shook his head. "No, actually. _I_ wasn't trying to kiss _you_."

Sirius looked confused. "So _I_ was trying to kiss _you_?"

Remus nodded.

"So why didn't you let me? Isn't that what you wanted?"

"You were drunk," Remus said. "You didn't know what you were doing. You'd have regretted it, and I'd have felt awful for letting you do it."

"I don't know what came over me," Sirius admitted. "I don't want to kiss you."

Remus tried not to let the words crush him, but he could feel his heart shattering. "Oh," was all he could say.

"I don't mean that in a bad way!" Sirius said quickly. "I just mean that, you know, you're a guy. It's just not something, um... I'm sorry, Remus."

"It's fine," Remus said, forcing a smile. "I didn't expect anything."

"I thought you should know that I might be getting a girlfriend soon," Sirius said quietly, avoiding eye contact with Remus.

"Oh," Remus said, breathing out slowly. "Okay."

"I just can't deal with this right now," Sirius explained. "I tried to kiss you while I was drunk. No way I'm letting that happen again. I need a girlfriend."

"Right," Remus replied. He felt like Sirius had punched a hole right through his heart. It took all of his strength to keep a straight face when all he wanted to do was curl up and cry.

"You're my best friend. We can't be anything more than that."

"I get it," Remus said. Sirius nodded and patted Remus on the shoulder.

"See you later, Rem."

"Bye," Remus croaked as Sirius headed towards the Great Hall. He didn't want to follow him. He didn't want to know which lucky girl would get to kiss the person he was mad about. He didn't want to see Sirius at all right now.

_Why did you get your hopes up?_

He knew he shouldn't have. Sirius had _told_ him that he was straight. Though he had definitely been flirting, and had tried to kiss him now twice in less than twenty-four hours.

_It was nothing_, he told himself. _Don't think about it. Don't think about _him_. You'll only hurt yourself more._

Remus headed upstairs and decided to take a nap. Anything to take his mind off of what Sirius was doing downstairs.

With every second he lay in bed trying to fall asleep, he felt his heart break a little bit more.

**###**


	8. Flirting

**We're getting towards the end of this fic now. Only a few chapters left. I LOVED ALL OF YOUR REVIEWS, MY GOODNESS :') You're all so awesome XD Here's the next chapter!**

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**Flirting**

Remus didn't manage to get much sleep. Every time he managed to nod off, the door would open and either James, Peter or Sirius would enter the room or leave the room. Finally, Remus decided it was no use trying to get to sleep. He stood up and yawned.

"Can't get my cloak back," James said, looking annoyed. "You couldn't get it for me, could you?"

"Huh?"

"Evans," James said. "She has my cloak and she won't give it back. She likes you the best."

"Oh," Remus said. "Yeah, sure."

"Did you hear about Sirius?" James asked, dropping down on the bed opposite Remus.

"No," Remus said, desperately hoping James wouldn't say anything about a girlfriend.

"Got himself a girl," James said. "McKinnon."

"Oh," Remus replied, trying to smile. "That's great. I'm happy for him."

James stared at Remus for a second and then laughed. "You don't _look_ happy. What's up with you anyway? Why've you been sleeping all day?"

"Don't worry about it," Remus said, sighing.

"Nope, I _will_ worry about it," James said, folding his arms. "You're one of my best mates. You have to tell me."

"I don't know how to tell you," Remus said, feeling sick. "And you probably wouldn't understand."

"Oh no," James said, looking sympathetic. "I know what it is."

"What?" Remus asked in alarm. "What is it then?"

"You like McKinnon too," James said, putting a comforting hand on Remus's shoulder.

"What? No!" Remus said quickly, laughing. "No way. I don't like her in that way."

James looked slightly confused. "Then what is it?"

"If I tell you, you must promise not to tell anyone," Remus said quietly.

James nodded quickly and leaned in eagerly. "What is it, then?"

"Well... you see... I think I'm, uh, gay," Remus said, looking nervously down at his hands as he spoke. "Well, I _thought_ I was... but now I just think I'm in love with one person, who just so happens to be a guy."

"Thank Merlin!" James said, looking strangely cheerful. Remus stared at him in confusion.

"Why?"

"Don't take this the wrong way but I was kind of... er... jealous of you. I thought you might have a crush on Lily or something and that you'd steal her from me. Because, let's face it, she likes you a _lot_ more than she likes me."

"She'll come around," Remus said, feeling relieved that James didn't think he was disgusting.

James nodded, and then cleared his throat. "So..."

"So?"

"So who's the guy?" James asked, expectantly.

"Oh, um," Remus could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. "It's Sirius."

James's expression changed and he was quiet for a moment before tilting his head to the side and speaking. "Does Sirius know about this?"

"Yes."

"So that's why he's been acting so weird around you," James said. "I was wondering – he's been flirting with you a lot."

"I know," Remus mumbled, looking down.

"Why aren't you happy about it? I mean, if Lily started flirting with me I'd be over the moon!"

"He doesn't mean any of it, though," Remus said. "He has a girlfriend now anyway."

"So you got your hopes up because of his flirting?" James asked.

"Unfortunately, yes," Remus said, sighing. "I don't know why. It's not like he'd ever want to be with me. He's straight, and I'm a werewolf."

James rolled his eyes. "You being a werewolf wouldn't matter to him. You know that, right? And just for the record, I think that Sirius might not be as straight as you think."

"What do you mean?"

"He'd kill me if I told you," James said, looking around cautiously. "You can't tell him I told you..."

"I promise I won't," Remus said.

"Okay," James said. "It was just over a year ago, during the summer. Sirius was staying over at my house, and we were really bored so Sirius came up with this 'ingenious' plan to get us fake so we could get into a Muggle nightclub. Anyway, we managed to get some and we snuck out of my house one night and got into a club. Have you ever been in one before, Remus? They're crazy! Anyways, I was in there drinking this gross drink called 'Vodka' or something strange like that, and all of a sudden I spot Sirius out of the corner of my eye snogging some bloke in an alcove in the corner of the club!"

Remus wasn't sure how to react to that. Sirius had kissed a guy before?

"I thought I was seeing things at first. I turned to get a proper look and it was definitely Sirius. I think I was kind of drunk, actually. I marched straight up to him and pulled the two of them apart and started demanding what he was doing. He looked really scared, and he said he wasn't sure _why_ he was kissing the dude. We talked about it the next day and I promised him I would never bring it up with him again, and that I wouldn't tell anybody. Well, I suppose I just broke my promise."

"So he kissed a guy?"

"Yeah."

"Do you think he's gay, then?" Remus asked.

"He might be," James said. "But then again, he has a girlfriend."

"The other night when he was drunk, he tried to kiss me," Remus said, unable to help himself. "And then earlier, he tried it again."

"Really?"

"Yeah, and then he got all weird about it and said that he doesn't know why he was asking to kiss me and that he really needs a girlfriend."

"Okay, so I think he is gay," James said, nodding. "He's just in denial. Just like the time in the club. He's trying to push it all to one side and he doesn't want to admit it."

"So you think I might have a chance with him?" Remus asked hopefully.

"Don't get your hopes up, just in case," James said. "But yes, I do."

Remus couldn't help grinning at that. The very thought that he may be able to kiss Sirius one day, and be with him, was the most amazing thought ever.

"You need to make him realise," James said. "Do what he was doing to you. Flirt with him."

"I don't know," Remus mumbled. "Do I look like the type of person who would flirt?"

"Sure you do!" James said. "Bend down in front of him, or... hmm... try to make him jealous."

"How can I make him jealous?"

"Tell him that you're over him and that you're into somebody else now," James said. "Say that he blew his chances or something."

Remus decided that James was liking this 'match-making' business too much as he watched James's eyes shine with excitement as he came up with ideas.

"Either make him jealous, or be so irresistible that he can't stand it any longer," James said with a grin. "You should wear your tie open and undo the top button on your shirt. Your hair should be messier than that," James said, ruffling Remus's hair to make it messier. "Ah, there. Perfect. Now go downstairs and find Sirius."

"What if he doesn't do anything about it?" Remus said, feeling strange with messy hair and an untidy uniform.

"He will," James said. "Just talk to him. Say you missed him, and that he looks too sexy to be real or something like that. Don't worry, you'll be fine."

Remus sighed and stood up. "Okay," he said. "I'm ready. Should I go downstairs now?"

"Yes," James replied, grinning. "Good luck, and make sure you get my cloak from Evans."

Remus nodded and headed towards the dormitory door. He felt more and more nervous with every step he took down to the common room. When he reached the bottom of the stairs, he scanned the room for Sirius.

_There_, he thought, as he saw his friend sitting next to Peter playing exploding snap. He strode over to where they were and dropped down onto the floor next to them, flashing a grin at Sirius.

"Hey, sexy," Remus whispered to Sirius, trying not to blush at how incredibly stupid and embarrassed he felt saying those words. He watched as Sirius looked at him, first at his messy hair, then at his smile, and then at his uniform. Sirius seemed to be staring for a very long time, looking a mixture of shocked and excited.

Finally, he cleared his throat. "Hey yourself, sexy," he said with a wink. Remus felt as though his heart would melt at that wink. It was incredible how one person could make him feel so happy with so few words.

"It's hot in here, isn't it?" Remus said, undoing another button on his shirt, revealing a bit more of his chest. He tried not to smile when he saw Sirius's eyes land on his chest. "See something you like, Sirius?"

Sirius coughed, looking bewildered. "Is that a new tie?"

Remus pursed his lips and leaned forwards so that his face was right next to Sirius's. "I think the question you wanted to ask was 'shall we go upstairs to the bedroom?'"

"I... uh... need to... er... wow... I feel faint, maybe I should lie down for a bit," Sirius said, looking flustered.

Peter, who had been watching them in confusion, looked quite disturbed as he stood up and left the common room in silence.

"Lie down?" Remus questioned. "Are you _sure_ that's what you need to do?"

"Well, what else would I mean?"

"I think someone needs to cool off a bit," Remus winked.

Sirius didn't have time to reply before he bolted upstairs, leaving Remus feeling unbelievably happy. He'd managed to flirt successfully, and not only did he know that Sirius was into him, but that Sirius was upstairs thinking about him while he 'cooled off'.

Nothing could be better.

**###**


End file.

Harry Potter, Friendship, Romance