Criminal Minds 1. And So It Begins

**Jazelina: Hello my peeps! Out of complete and total boredom, my sister and I decided to write a story together.**

**Edwardo: We don't expect any reviews, since we are doing this for our own personal entertainment. And believe me, we _are _laughing.**

**Disclaimer: We don't own Criminal Minds, but we are the owners of Victoria Smith, Kate and Lizz Leeks, Angelo Castello, and ALL POSSIBLE OFFSPRING! RAWR!**

Preggers

Prologue

And So It Begins

Victoria POV

I sat on the bathroom floor, crying as I looked at that stupid pink plus sign. There was muted laughter in the background, and I couldn't tell if it was either the television spouting some random show that little Anthony was currently obsessed with or if Katelynn was trying to supress her laughter as she hid herself in a corner.

I couldn't help but remember how everything started.

_One Year Ago_

I was down in Virginia, Quantico to be exact. Aaron, my brother, had just returned to an empty house thanks to his soon to be ex-wife. Me being me, and since I, technically, didn't have a job yet, I flew down to comfort Aaron so the house didn't feel so empty.

I was a few block away from where i dropped Aaron off at work. Okay, fine. He dropped me off. But! I was the one who had his keys. Technically, not by any legal means. But whose counting? I pulled out the small ring of keys, smiling as I thought back several years to when I had first moved in with my roommates. Kate and Liz had spent several hours teaching me the fine art of being a pickpocket. At the very least, I could always snag some extra coffee money. Their words, not mine. And coffee did sound really good right no-

"I'm so sorry!" I cried as I looked at the boy in front of me. Oh, wait! It wasn't a boy, it was a man! A young man, but still. He wasn't a kid. I had crashed into him, causing him yo spill his coffee all over his beige sweater vest. I liked sweater vests. They're all…vest-y.

"Uh, it's fine?" he stuttered a little, as if he was nervous. Now why would such a cutie like jim be nervous?

I smiled at him before bending down and picking up Aaron's dropped car keys. "I should, at the very least, buy you a new coffee since I wasn't paying attention."

Technically…I was. But he was cute and I was using Aaron's money. What he didn't know couldn't hurt him.

I'm, uh, late for work." The man mumbled, blushing and looking down at his feet.

Snapping open my magenta patent leather pure, I pulled out a sticky note and a pen, scratching out my name and number. "The name's Victoria Smith. I'll be in town for a bit, so call me so I

can make it up to you, kay?"

"O-okay. I'm, uh, Spencer." he muttered as he took the offered sticky note from me. I couldn't help but smile. So cute! So amazingly adorable!

"Call me!" I called to him as I flounced off. I wasn't in the mood for coffee anymore. However…now all I really wanted to do was go grocery shopping, start figuring out what I would lie about on my future resumes, call Katie to see how many people she had scammed today, and ask Lizzy about how her son was doing and if she was serious about trying for another. After that, Aaron would probably call, annoyed that I had taken his car and would then proceed to have me go and pick him up.

And the day, unsurprisingly, went exactly as I had planned.

Except I really wanted Spencer the Cutie to call me.

When I talked to my lovely roommates, they had both given me some advice, though I doubted I would be listening to it anytime soon.

Kate said I should have a quick one nightstand and take all of his money. Besides, she doesn't remember the last time I had 'gotten some'. I vetoed that plan since I never liked the idea of one nighters.

Lizz simply said I could do whatever, but if he hurt me, she'd go down there and kill him herself. And hide the body so well, it would never be found. I believed her, considering all of her exboyfriends had all disappeared. Or maybe that was a creepy rumour that everyone who knew the sisters just happened to know. Never mind. It's probably just some rumour.

When I pulled into the parking lot, an angry Aaron was standing in his empty parking space. "Hey Aari! How was your day?" I asked sweetly as I relocated over to the passenger's seat.

He sighed, knowing that eve if he did get mad at me, I would probably do the same thing again and again until I left for New York. "Fine, just paperwork today." he stated simply.

"Lovely! Well, I met this really cute guy today! So adorable! I just wanna hug him! So I gave him my number and hopefully he'll call me before I leave!" I smiled in rememberance of the really cute nerd from earlier. So…cute…

"What's-"

"No! I'm not giving you his name! Then you'll run a background check on him before trying to find a way to imprison him!"

"I would never."

"Says you!"

_Thursday That Same Week_

Spencer POV

I was sitting at my desk, staring at the crumpled sticky note in my hand. I didn't have to keep the note or anything, since the second I looked at it I had everything memorised. It was the first girl, who wasn't related to me, gave me. But she probably didn't want to date me or anything. She probably only wanted to pay me back for the spilt coffee, and possibly my ruined sweater vest. Probably. The chances of her even being interested in me is at about 5.17%.

"hey, Pretty Boy. You got some girl's number?" Morgan asked, leaning forward and plucking the number from my hand. "Victoria, huh? She sounds hot."

"W-well I guess she is?" I didn't know how to answer that question. She had honey blonde hair, dark brown eyes, and a blindingly white smiled. But I didn't want to call her. She gave me her number out of pity, that's it.

"You're calling her, Pretty Boy." Morgan stated simply, grabbing me by the arm and dragging me away to Gracia's Cave.

"But she doesn't want to hear from me!" I tried to get out of Morgan's grip, but my struggles only attracted the attentions of Prentiss and JJ. Of course they decided to it's be more fun to torture me than to help me escape something I didn't want to participate in.

"Pretty Boy, if a girl gives you her number, she wants to hear from you." Morgan grinned at me before pushing me into Garcia's Cave. He handed a phone and commanded me to dial. While I punched in the numvers, Morgan began filling in Garcia, Prentiss, and JJ.

"Victoria Smith speaking! If you're trying to sell me something, hand up or forever wish that I didn't rip all the hair off your body!" A happy voice giggled.

"Uh, hey. This is Spencer." I mumbled.

"Oh, hey! From the coffee shop! I, at the very least, owe you a bagel or something. I might have ruined your sweater vest, and it was cute!" I could very easily picture Victoria's grin.

And at that moment, I think I fell in love.


	2. I Put The Fun In Funeral

**Jazelina: Ah, chapter one. I almost didn't want to post you today. I wanted to wait until tomorrow, but nooooooooo.**

**Edwardo: Shut up. You told me you wanted to update everyday.**

**Jazelina: Well, I don't wanna anymore!**

**Edwardo: But, you still did so there! I win!**

**Disclaimer: We own nothing except for those characters we own. Which aren't Criminal Minds ones. So there!**

Preggers

Chapter One

I Put The Fun In Funeral

Elizabeth POV

I lounged on a worn brown leather love seat, glaring slightly at the tv. The things one did for love. In other words, I was stuck listening to Spongebob Squarepants while Anthony ran around in circles, laughing and babbling. I shifted in boredom, nudging random toys out of the way if I could.

I grabbed a blueberry muffin from the plate sitting on my lap, stuffing it in my mouth when I heard crying. As I headed for my bedroom, I snatched up Anthony and held him upside down. He shrieked with laughter as I headed to my bedroom, thinking that I'd find a crying Izabella. Instead, I found my dear two month old baby girl sleeping happily.

And since it wasn't my baby…

"Tori! You have five seconds to tell me why you are crying. and therefore disturbing an epic episode of Spongebob, before I break down this door!" I yelled loudly to get my point across, but softly enough that Izabella wouldn't wake up. The fussy thing.

Anthony was still giggling while all the blood dropped to his head. The boy was so easy to please, unlike his fussy, fussy sister.

"O-open!" Tori wailed. Pressing my ear against the door, I could hear faint laughter beneath the crying. Oh, so that's where Katie disappeared to. Little monster.

I pushed open the door only to get an armful of sobbing Tori. Greaaaaat. Carefully manoeurving Anthony to make she he didn't end up squished to death, man would my hubby be angry, the kid ended up on top of my head while I tried to console a depressed Tori.

"Hush, Tori. Now why are you crying?" I held her close while trying not to wince with a crazy giggling boy wiggling on top of my head. I might have to cute my hair short again so it wouldn't be so hard to manage…

"Her eggo is preggo!" Kate chuckled as she began rolling around on the ground. No way! Would I seriously not be the only one in this merry group of friends with kids? Oh the awesomeness!

"Poor child… Your really geeky boyfriend got you pregnant…" I tried to comfort her as best I could. Which wasn't all that well because laughter began welling up inside. But, I held it in. Which is more than I can say about Kate. The crazy girl. She couldn't get a sentence out properly and she almost looked blue. Oh well.

"I d-don't know w-what t-to do!" Tori wailed in anguish.

"You know we could always visit Geek Boy and Hotchipoo and tell them about the newest addition to the family. Because you are keeping this child." I smiled as I looked up at her. Stupid blondes being several inches taller…

I dragged her over to the room she shared with Crazy Katie. Grabbing a duffel bag, I began throwing various clothes in it after I placed Anthony on the floor. It wasn't long before Kate dragged herself into the room and started packing herself.

"But what about work?" Tori asked, slumped over on the floor.

At that, Kate brightened. She fished out her cellphone before calling work. The brunette began sobbing, somehow stuttering out something about an uncle, funerals, and needing a week to sort out life/deal with his death. Hanging up the phone, Kate grinned. "I just scored a week of fun!"

"I thought you had to go to a funeral?" I asked, putting my hands on my hips after I zipped up Tori's bag.

"What can I say? I put the fun in funerals!" Kate chuckled as she began packing herself.

Tori was just sitting on the floor in barely concealed anguish. I poked her, trying to get her to laugh. "Come on, Tori! You're brother will be happy that you've actually managed to have a productive and healthy relationship and that you're having kid."

"Only after he kills the father, though." Kate snipped as she was trying to decide between three different pairs of high heels to bring on the trip.

I pushed my black glasses back to the bridge of my nose. "Oh, Hotchipoo will just have to share Spencey-Whencey with us. We've been planning various ways to dispose of the body for _years_!" I sighed while leaning against a wall. Anthony began tugging on my pants and I bent down to pick him up. He giggled as he began tugging on my hair, his brown eyes sparkling in happiness. I still haven't figured out how he did that…

"You haven't even know him a year." Victoria muttered, hands wrapping instinctively around her stomach.

Kate leaned over and began wiggling her fingers and began making creepy noises. "We are psychic!"

"We can see the future! We see all, we know all…" I whispered as spookily as I could, my dark brown eyes widening and a freaky smile covered my face. There was a creepy atmosphere in the room until Anthony decided that he wanted to talk too.

"Future!" he giggled like a maniac. "Future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future, future!" he continued babbling as he tugged hard on my dark brown hair.

The one good thing that came out of that…lovely…experience was that Victoria cracked a smile and tried to hide a small giggle. But she couldn't hide laughter from me! Skillfully disentangling Tony's fingers from my hair, I rearranged him until he was situated properly on my hip. And so he couldn't reach my hair.

"Katie? I need you to go and start packing a bag for me, and no funny business! I have to go and see which child, if any, I'll be bringing down to Virginia." I left the room, hearing a complaining Kate and a giggling Tori.

"Future!" Tony giggled was we left the apartment. I struggled to walk up the flight of stairs that would lead me up to my husband-of-five-years apartment. I wasn't as if I was _horribly _out of shape, but really! You try being in shape when you just had a kid barely two months ago! Besides, it wasn't as if I _wasn't _trying. It's just hard to find time to jog or something when I had to take care of at _least _one kid day after day. Though, Angelo did take responsibility of Tony every other week. Even though the crazy kid, for some reason unknown to _all of mankind_, preferred me to his father.

Reaching a brown door that looked identical to all the others in this lovely apartment complex except for the fact there was a tiny bright green handprint in the corner, courtesy of Tony, I began banging on the door to be let in.

If I had to be awake at five in the morning to take care of my kids, comfort a pregnant friend, _and _somehow prepare for a trip down in Virginia without cracking, so would he. So. Would. He.

"Wake _up _you lazy excuse for a human! I need to talk to you! _Now!_" I yelled. Tony then decided that chanting 'up and now' would be the most fun he had in ages! Yay! Rip out my ear drums now, please.

One of Angelo's lazy ass roommates opened the door. Of course… It just _had _to be Brady. Asshole. "Let me in. Now." I ground out. All I really wanted to do was oh, I don't know… Maybe push him down a flight of stairs. Or something productive like that. Because then, he'd finally have a use in the world. Like giving me some free entertainment.

"Oh, come on. Don't be like that. You know you _loooooove _me. More than you love Angelo, anyway." Brady leered at me while leaning forward, entering my personal space bubble. Instead of saying anything, I just grinned and placed Tony in his arms.

"Hurt my kid, and I'll kill you." I said simply as Tony wiggled and giggled and babbled himself silly. Brady freaked when Tony ended up in his arms, but he didn't dare do anything about it as I

moved past him and into the apartment. I headed straight for the room Angelo shared with Lance. I suppose I could be jealous that my husband rooms with a gay guy, but I'd rather Lance than Brady. At least Lance didn't hit on me.

Lance was gone, probably staying at his boyfriend's house over night, so I didn't have to worry about waking him up as I pushed Angelo to the floor. A loud crash and a scream echoed in the smallish room. Poor Angelo. I didn't mean to have him hit his head on the wall when I pushed him off his bed. Poor, poor Angelo.

"Don't eat me, Mother!" Angelo wailed as he flailed to alertness.

"Should I be worried?" I asked as I plopped down onto his mussed up bed.

"You are an angel," Angelo started before being interrupted by Brady who was still trying to keep Tony from falling.

"From Hell."

"Why thank you for the lovely compliment." I grinned sarcastically. "Now, Jelo, I going to Virginia for a week. Which kid do you want more?"

"You have to go?"

"Yes."

He raised a brow.

"Kinda."

He grunted.

"Sorta."

He snorted.

"Okay, fine! Not really, no!" I threw my arms into the air. Tony started chanting 'no'.

"Then why are you going?" Angie stretched out on the floor, trying to get comfortable. I tossed him a pillow, he smiled in thanks.

"Tori's pregnant and she has to tell her brother and her boyfriend."

"Does Spencer know that his girlfriend is his boss's little sister?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Well, it's not as if we've ever brought it up. We know, he doesn't, and it's gonna be hilarious when the two of them find out."

"You're very mean."

"I know."

"So you're going to get a few laughs?"

"I'll be taping the entire thing so we can watch together when I get home."

"You promise?"

"Wait, you're seriously gonna release that crazy demon into the world?"

"Shut up, Brady!" Angelo and I shouted at the same time. Anthony decided that his new favorite phrase was 'shut up'. Crazy kid was like a sponge.

"Yeah, I promise. It'll be one of the funniest thing you've ever seen. Cross my heart and hope to…live."

"Fine, you can go. But I want you back here in a week!"

"Can do. So which kid are you taking?"

"Izabella. She's too young to travel yet."

"Kay. Make sure the Constellation doesn't die while I'm away!"

"I highly doubt that our casino will end up failing because you aren't there to micromanage everything."

"You never know, you never know…"

Angelo stood up and took Anthony away from Brady. "Hello, my Little Toe!"

"Daddy, me a Big Toe!"

"I don't know…" Angelo appeared deep in thought.

"Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe, Big Toe!"

"Okay then, you're a Big Toe."

"Good." Tony nodded his head firmly.

"If my child refers to himself as a toe for the rest of his life, I'm blaming you." I said, leaning back on the bed.

"I wouldn't have it any other way." Angelo grinned before turning serious. "You have to be good for Mama, okay?"

"Okay! See you later, Toe!"

"TOE!"

"Jelo, come down to get Izabella and her stuff in half and hour. We'll be leaving for the train station then. Bye! Love you! See you soon!"

I sighed as I took Tony and left Angie and Brady in their apartment. If this was a suggestion of how long this week was gonna be, I was doomed.

"Kate, I thought I told you no funny business!" I yelled when I saw she had packed my bag completely with diapers.

"Oops!" she shrugged while redoing her nails silver, red, and blue.

Save me. Someone. Please.


End file.

Criminal Minds, Humor, Romance