Harry Potter Drapple Love

**A/N: Hello, my lovely readers! This is a one shot based on another dream I had (have you read The Peanut? It was even weird to write). So there I was in Paris, eating a green apple (which i normally hate) and thinking about the ship 'Drapple' I then decided to take a nap and of course, i dreamt about DRAPPLE! So here it goes. **

It was thirteen months after the war and Draco was trying to get some sleep but his mother kept shouting at the top of her voice to do something stupid like clean the dog's cage. His mother would realize they didn't have a dog after he spent countless hours searching for one.

He groaned, grabbed Mr. Snooglebums (his pink teddy bear which was full of goody love!) and marched down to the kitchen to face his mother.

"Yes, mother?" An irritated Draco said once his mother was gently sipping her tea in front of him.

"Draco! Why are you still in your pajamas? This is outrageous!" Narcissa said once she looked up to greet her son.

"Mother-"

"I don't even know how you forced us into making those silly pajamas. You're a grown man, Draco!"

"Mother! My Mr. Snooglebums' pajamas are NOT silly! They're warm and comfortable and when Mr. Snooglebums was washing, they reminded me of him," Draco wiped a tear from his eye.

Narcissa shook her head, "Well, get dressed and go to the grocery store. I need you to buy me these," She handed him a small piece of paper.

Draco stomped his feet angrily, "But Mummy! Why can't the house elves do it?"

"They can't do it because they would stand out in a MUGGLE shop,"

Draco was horrified, "Muggles? But-"

"No but's Draco. Get changed then get down here,"  
Draco sighed and stuck his tongue out at her and stomped all the way to his room.

Narcissa sighed, "My boy," and she sipped her tea

Once Draco was dressed, he headed downstairs and glared at his mother.

"Now Draco, I want you to but everything on this list," She said firmly, then smiled warmly at him, "And of course! You can buy something for yourself too," she cooed.

Draco rolled his eyes and swatted away the hand that was pinching his cheek.

"Good-bye, _Mother_," He said and snatched the paper out of her hand.

He turned on the spot and allowed the blackness to swallow him and waited for the tightness to go away.

He patted his pocket to make sure he had muggle money.

Muttering something about stupid muggle stores, he entered the grocery shop.

The first thing on his list were 39 cucumbers. A vegetable his mother greatly enjoyed. He quickly threw in the wretched fruit in his basket and saw that the next item on his list were thirteen kiwis. Also a vegetable his dear mother enjoyed.

He tossed the 13 kiwis in the basket without paying them a second thought. The next juicy item on his list were 26 strawberries. Yet another thing his mother particularly enjoyed.

He was careful with the strawberries. They weren't half bad.

As he was buying the 169 bananas, he noticed a sight that made him drop all of them nasty bananas.

Draco was a respectable wizard and only something beyond adjectives could cause him to stand in the middle of a muggle store, surrounded by bananas with his mouth open large enough to hold a bee hive.

In front of him (well, around ten feet in front of him) was the sight that caused him to fall in love immeadiately.

_She's just so beautiful _ Draco thought as he made his was towards her. Once he reached her, he gently picked up the glorious green apple that had fallen from it's -sorry _her- _basket into the basket of red apples.

He brought his lips close the smooth green skin of the apple and just as he was about to kiss Belle (That's what he named her), a voice interupted him.

"Uh, mister. You have to pay for it if you're gonna eat it," The cashier said in an American accent.

The cashier was a weird mix of Ron and Harry; half of his hair was red and half of hair was a messy black. His face's shape was of Ron's and had Harry's emerald eyes, Ron's nose, Harry's mouth and Ron's ears.

Draco snorted and turned away. But when the cashier wasn't looking, he kissed the apple. After quickly buying everything else on the list, he rushed out and was about to apparate back to the Manor when he spotted that the shop neighbouring the grocery shop was selling tiny clothes.

Once Belle was clothed in a tiny pink hat, a striped silver and black scarf and a striped shirt, he apparated back to the Manor and gave Winky, the house elf, the bags and rushed to his room.

After placing a sound proof and locking spell on his door, he grinned maliciously at Belle and said, "Now, where were we?"  
He kissed her for about 30 seconds then removed her clothing and kissed her again. He started to peel off her skin with his teeth and moaned at the delicious bland taste of her skin. Once she was... skinless, he took his first bite and relished the taste of her.

After devouring her, he took her core out into the garden and burried her next to an orange tree. He gave her a small funeral and once it was over, he wiped a tear that dared to leak out of the eye of DRACO MALFOY!

He looked up and spotted a beautiful orange hanging in the tree. Forgetting all about Belle, he reached up and grabbed the orange.

**A/N: Well that was... strange. Well I hope you liked it! R&R**

**Oh and by the way, 39, 26 and 169 are all divisible by thirteen. I know to most people, 13 is an unlucky number, but to me it's very, very, very lucky! **

**39 divided by 3 = 13**

**26 divided by 2 = 13**

**169 divided by 13 = 13.**

**check it you want to.**


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor, Parody