Inuyasha 1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I dont own Inuyasha, but I do own the other characters made up for this story. If i did own Inuyasha...hehehe...MUAHAHAHAHAHA!...cough cough...enjoy the story.

**Chapter One: Arrival**

-A girl with dirty-blonde shoulder length hair, blue eyes, and an American was flipping through the channels while sitting on her futon.

She flipped and flipped and flipped and saw a glimpse of Inuyasha on! It was her frickin favorite show! (A\N: It is) She quick flipped back and sat, watching. It was a good episode! (A\N: Of course all them are!) During the break, she went to go get some ramen.. She waited for the ramen to cook in the microwave when she heard a crash in the living room.

"Oh no! Snickers! Ace! What did you two do!" she wailed.

"WHAT THE HELL?" she heard.

Those were NOT her two dogs. But it was a certain dog-demon. Well, half.

"INUYASHA!" she heard another familiar voice. But this one she did NOT like. (A\N: Sorry Kagome fans, I HATE her.)

She stood behind the wall that led to the living room. She listened as a demon-slayer, monk, two-tailed cat demon, and fox demon crashed to the floor.

"Sango! Are you hurt?" a certain monk asked.

"I'm fine, thanks Mi-" but Sango stopped mid-sentence and soon a slap was heard. "Hands OFF you pervert!"

"I was just trying to make sure you were okay. No need to be harsh!" he pleaded. A WHACK! of the boomerang was heard.

"Would you two quit?" Inuyasha yelled. "Hey Kagome, where the hell are we?"

"This is my time," Kagome told him, "but not my home. Far from it actually."

The girl was giggling with joy! Inuyasha was in _her_ house! Too bad Kagome was here……

Inuyasha sniffed the air. The girl was soon stricken with an "Oh NO!" thought. The microwave timer went off. (A\N: RAMEN'S DONE!XD)

"Someone's here!" Inuyasha cried. He pulled out Tetsusaiga.

"Show yourself!"

Everyone went into the fighting stance.

The girl had an idea. She took out her trusty dog whistle! She blew on the whistle. Her two dogs came running, but, she had forgotten that Inuyasha could also hear it.

He dropped Tetsusaiga , untransforming it, and went to his knees.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome cried. Kirara mewed and jumped onto Sango, trying to cover her ears.

"Damn it," Inuyasha gasped.

The girl realized what she had done.

"Oh NO!" she screamed at herself. Quickly she halted the whistling.

Her two dogs sat quietly, waiting for her to tell them what to do. She bent down and whispered to them. They wagged their tails and ran toward the Inu gang. Inuyasha stood up.

The dogs, Snickers and Ace, quickly ran to Tetsusaiga, chomped down on to it, and ran back to their owner.

"HEY!" Inuyasha screamed. "Come back here with my sword!"

He ran after them, while the Inu gang giggled.

"What a moron," Shippo coolly said.

"Here he comes!" thought the girl, holding Tetsusaiga.

Inuyasha ran around the corner; he saw her.

"Hey!" but before he could say another word, Ace and Snickers grabbed the sheath and gave it to their owner.

Inuyasha stood dumbfounded. The girl seized the moment. She sheathed Tetsusaiga, and ran for it.

"Get back here, damn it!" Inuyasha yelled at her. She ran as fast as she could; Inuyasha ran after her. She skipped two stairs at a time and raced to her bedroom. Inuyasha was right behind her. (A\N: The suspense is killing me! Not really, I wrote it!)

"Give that back!"

One last bound. BAM! She locked the door, and ran to safe. She knew Inuyasha could never get it open, even WITH Iron Reaver. Opening it quickly, she threw Tetsusaiga in and slammed it shut. Inuyasha broke down the door.

"Give that back girl!"

"NO!" In her mind she was trembling.

The Inu gang ran to the door and saw Inuyasha standing by the girl.

"Gimme it now!" he cracked his knuckles. The girl closed her eyes.

"INUYASHA! SIT!"

He slammed face first into the floor. He shot back up quickly. But then was slammed down again after another sit. And another. And another. And another. And possibly one more. (Anameia's note: I THOUGHT OF THAT!)

_**Commercials. WATCH THE MONKEY DANCE! DANCE, MONKEY, DANCE! And now back to the show…(Nickamo note: I THOUGHT OF THAT!)**_

After all of the slamming into the floor and almost breaking it, the Inu gang and the girl heard screaming/singing, (A\N: If you call it singing. It was horrible), outside.

"I FOUND THE CRAYON! THAT SAVES THE DAY!" two girls were singing/screaming.

Soon a crash was heard at the front door.

"AEREN! LOOK AT THE CRAYON! IT SAVES THE DAY! WITH PRETTY COLORS!"

"Oh no…" the girl, known as Aeren, said out loud.

The Inu gang looked at her.

"What the hell is THAT?" Inuyasha mumbled from the floor.

"AEREN LOOK AT THE CRAY-….**MIROKU**!" said a dark haired girl, with ears pieced just like Miroku's. (A\N: Hmmm… I wonder why…) She jumped onto his back screaming in his ear. Making him wince in pain at high pitch squealing. Aeren and the other girl, Anameia, worked together to pry the girl, who prefers to be called Nickamo, off of Miroku. They attempted holding her back, but were unsuccessful. She tackled him to the ground. Aeren tried to get her off AGAIN, but was no match for Nickamo's desire to show Miroku her pretty crayon. And Anameia was off with Shippo.

Aeren, now realizing that Inuyasha was still there, and still smashed into the ground, decided to help him up. As soon as he was up…

"GIMME MY SWORD BACK DAMN IT!"

"What would I get out of it?" she asked, slyly hinting something.

"Umm…. I dunno," he said, being the dense person he was. (A\N: I LOVE INUYASHA!)

Aeren sighed. "What I _mean_ is I want you to stay!" and mumbled to herself, "not you Kagome…"

**In the background…**

"Will you bear my child?" asked a certain monk.

Before Nickamo could answer, he was hit very hardly over the head with a large boomerang.

**Something completely random!** Nickamo lost her pretty turquoise-blue crayon.

"NOOO!"

**now back to the story**

Inuyasha tried Iron Reaver on the safe, attempting to get his sword out. Of course it didn't because I said it wouldn't earlier in the story. Weren't you paying attention?

"Damn it! It didn't work!" he wailed.

"Duh! Of course it didn't. I said so."

"You did…"

"Yeah. Don't you see the story line?"

"Storyline? You mean this is a story? People are going to read this?"

"Yep."

"NOOO! MY SECRET HAS BEEN REVIELED!I'M A WOMAN!"

He tore off his kimono, revealing a pink fluffy dress, and he sat and cried in the corner with Nickamo.

JUST KIDDING! I love Inuyasha too much to do that to him…

**Now the _REAL_ story…**

"Damn it! It didn't work!"

He looked sadly over at Aeren.

"You aren't going to get that out are you?"

"No."

Kagome was going to say something but Aeren stopped her.

"Shut up. No one likes you!"

Inuyasha growled.

"You want your sword back or not?"

"Damn it…"

**In the next room**

"Got any twos Shippo?" asked Anameia.

"No, Go Fish!"

"Damn it…"

_**Commercials: Eat at McDonalds! With every hamburger you get a pretty crayon!**_

Aeren: This is the end for now…….TBC….only if we get good comments……OH TO HELL WITH THAT! We'll write more anyways!

Nickamo: Bwahahahahahaha…BOO!

Anameia: THAT WAS SO STUPID! WHY DID YOU STEAL HIS TETSUSAIGA? THAT'S LIKE SIGNING A DEATH WISH!

Aeren: ...so...

Nickamo: Tancreed Torsson, if you're reading this...I LOVE YOU!

Anameia: Please R&R

Inuyasha: We'll love forever if you review this!...Unless you're a guy...then Kagome will love you forever...or Sango...yea...

Nickamo: I WROTE ALL OF THE COMMERCIALS!

**Will Nickamo ever find her crayon? Will Anameia ever get a two? Will Inuyasha ever get his sword? Will Kagome ever get out of the closet I am planning to lock her in…SHOOT! Forget I said that….. Tune in next time to find out…**


	2. Chapter 2

-1**Disclaimer:** see first chapter…o! And we don't own Mc Donald's either…if we did then there REALLY would be free crayons with every burger.

A\N: Thanks wolfygirl13 for being our first reviewer! Sesshomaru wants YOU to eat a cookie…yay! Don't worry; he'll be in this chapter.

**Chapter Two:**

"NOOOOO! I STILL CANT FIND MY CRAYON!…KAGOME! YOU TOOK IT!" Nickamo shouted, and tackled her to the ground.

Miroku muttered to himself, "I wouldn't want to get in a fight with her…"

Nickamo grabbed her crayon, and shoved Kagome into the closet that magically appeared behind her. (A\N: Sorry, you Kagome fans, but I don't like her AT ALL!) She locked the door, and happily scribbled all over the walls while singing, "LOOK AT THE CRAYON! IT SAVED THE DAY! KAGOME STOLE IT! BUT I GOT IT BACK! AND NOW SHE'S IN A CLOSET! WOOT WOOT!"

Then Nickamo jumped onto Miroku, and began singing\screaming into his ears and hurting his poor eardrums.

"Hey! What'd you do to Kagome?" Inuyasha yelled at Nickamo.

"Hey, don't yell at her!" yelled Aeren back at him.

"Why the hell not?"

"Because I said so!"

"Feh, am I ever gonna get my sword back?"

"I'll make you a deal…" Aeren answered slyly. "I'll give you your sword back if you take me out for the night!"

"Do I have a choice?" asked Inuyasha looking a bit frightened.

"Well, you could take me out, and get your sword back, _or_ we could sit here all day and you don't get anything!"

"Damn it. But what about Kagome?"

"Kagome? Well, the closet she was locked into is pretty much a black hole that sent her traveling through space and time…otherwise known as Nickamo's room."

"Will I ever get to see her again?" Inuyasha asked.

"NO!..I mean…only if you're good," Aeren replied.

_**In the other room…** _

"Got any fives, Anameia?" asked Shippo.

"Damn it…yes…here you go."

**_In the kitchen…_**

**CRASH! **"The cookies escaped again!" said Nickamo happily, and finally letting go of Miroku allowing him to breathe.

Everyone, including Anameia and Shippo, ran down to the kitchen to see what happened.

"What the flip? Nickamo what did you do!" screamed Aeren.

"It wasn't me…he did it!" she called, pointing at a white figure in a corner of the room.

They turn to see Sesshomaru with his head in the cookie jar saying, "Hewwo cookie!"

He quickly pulled his head out and said out loud, "You didn't see anything…" and ran away, taking the cookie jar with him.

Out of nowhere, wolfygirl13 popped up, and shouted, "MAN, THAT WAS HOT!"

"Who the flip are you?" asked Anameia.

She said very suspiciously, "I was never here…" then she disappeared to back from where she came. (A\N: Sorry if this doesn't sound like you, but I just had to put it in…BEWARE REVIEWERS! If we get a good review from you, you might just end up in our story…BEWARE! Which is a good thing if ya think about it!)

After recovering from the shock of seeing Sesshy with his head in the cookie jar, Aeren reminded Inuyasha of their deal, and he took her out to eat at…

_**Commercial Break!…to build up suspense…: **_

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!…

_**Now back to the story… (A\N: we ran out of commercial ideas…)**_

And he took her out to eat at…MC DONALD'S!

Everyone jumped into the mysteriously appearing Hover Car, and attempted to drive to Mc Donald's, and crashing into a parking meter.

When they entered Mc Donald's, they a suspiciously familiar cookie jar on the counter…

"COOKIES!" squealed Nickamo, and ran towards them, but was stopped by a person whom we saw just about two minutes ago.

"MY cookies," Sesshomaru said in his calm voice, and with a straight face on.

"What are you doing here?" called Inuyasha.

"Looking for my…SECRET HIDEOUT!" he shouted a little too loudly. "TO THE TRASHCAN CAR!"

"That's just a trashcan," Nickamo pointed out.

"So…"

"Actually, it's just the lid…" Aeren said.

"So…AWAY!" he called, obviously expecting the lid to take him somewhere.

"You're not going anywhere…" Anameia pointed out.

"So…THE POWER OF IMAGINATION!" then he poofed away to some distant place.

"MAN, THAT WAS HOT!" said wolfygirl13, appearing out of nowhere, as she did before.

"Who are you!" yelled Aeren.

"That's for me to know, and you to find out…" then she poofed away, just like Sesshomaru.

"Oh Inuyasha! What do you want to eat?" Aeren called to him.

He rolled his eyes, "Umm…Whatever you're getting."

"That'll be two hamburgers then," she told the cashier.

**_Now a completely random event!_**

Kagome was flying through time and space, and somehow her skirt was not flying up…

"Ahhh! I'm falling through time and space."

She then soon landed in the midst of Nickamo's room.

"What a strange place. I should -"

But who cares, we hate Kagome.

**_Now back to the original story!_**

Sango was green with envy. How could an American girl steal away her Miroku? Nickamo was gonna get it, and soon. Sango plotted…

Nickamo was glued to Miroku's arm. No. Seriously. She was. She found the crazy glue somehow and yeah….. That's not good. Not only was her arm glued to Miroku's, but her fingers were glued together.

Back to Sango. She was listening to Nickamo's every word, waiting for her moment to strike. But with Nickamo glued to Miroku, she wouldn't be able to send her into the closet and send her through space and time. She needed a plan…

Sango had an idea. "Kirara!" and she whispered her evil plot to her. Kirara mewed and went into the kitchen and got a bucket! She filled it with hot, boiling hot, water. Hot enough to unstick crazy glue, hypothetically speaking of course. (Do not try this at home. Especially the crazy glue part) Kirara came back with the bucket and gave it to Sango. Sango snuck up on Nickamo and Miroku. She poured the hott(with two t's!) water all over them…….or at least she tried. Nickamo's crayon jumped in the way at the last second shouting "NOOO!" very dramatically. Even though crayons can't talk…NOW THEY CAN! (Chuck Norris says so…) Yet the hott water still reached Nickamo's arm, which was glued to Miroku's, and became unstickeded…yeah…

**Commercial Break: FUN FACTS ABOUT CHUCK NORRIS!**

1) Once there was nothing. Then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the nothing and said "GET A JOB!" And that's how the universe was created

2) Chuck Norris once shot down a plane by pointing his finger at it and saying "BANG!"

**End Commercial Break!**

Nickamo grieved the loss of her now melted crayon.

"NOO! MY CRAYON! HE SAVED THE DAY FOR HIS LAST TIME!" she wailed.

Sango saw her chance! She opened the magical black hole/closet/Nickamo's room that pops out of nowhere whenever needed. And pushed Nickamo in. (Insert scary music here) Nickamo landed in her room and opened a door that lead out.

"Hey Kagome!" Nickamo said,. "See ya Kagome!" And walked out of the room, locking the door behind her.

"What the -" Kagome started.

But Nickamo slammed the door in the face, because Kagome NEVER swears and so we needed to cut her off.

Sango jumped up and down in joy and did a little happy dance.(Add happy music here) Miroku was finally hers! But then Nickamo popped up and ruined the moment.

"Look what I got! Non-washable crazy glue!" Nickamo said happily, as she glued herself to Miroku once more. "Kinda ironic how the water washed it off last time. Wouldn't want THAT happening again!"

Sango slapped her forehead.

**Now back to the original story line…**

"You want to do something ELSE!" Inuyasha spazzed.

"Yes," Aeren said matter-of-factly.

"What the hell do you want to do?" Inuyasha said sadly.(He's all mopey)

"ROLLERSKATING!" Nickamo popped up, randomly shouting.

"Ok!" Aeren agreed.

Inuyasha sweat-dropped.

**Commercial Break!**

3) Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter!

4) Chuck Norris knows the EXACT location of Carmen Sandiego. ALWAYS.

**Now back to the story**

They walked into the roller-skating parlor (yes a PARLOR) and walked up to the counter to receive their skates. There was a familiar cookie jar on the counter yet again. They looked behind the counter to see non-other than Sheshomarnyu (inside joke…It means Sesshy)

"Welcome to Happy Skate Parlor…HAPPY!" he said with a fake smile and a twitching eye. (He's high of butter…and cookies.) "Would you like a pair of Happy Skates? HAPPY!"

"Okay…" Aeren said, a little freaked out…just a little. "We'll need 7 pairs."

He replied, "Here are your Happy Skates! HAPPY! And here's your Happy change…HAPPY!"

"Thanks…" Nickamo said, happily frolicking, while still attached to Miroku's arm, to a seat to put on her skates.

"What the hell are these things?" Inuyasha asked, spinning one of the wheels.

"They're called roller-skates," Anameia answered him. "They have wheels on them so you can move around."

"This is fun?" Inuyasha asked. "I can do this with regular shoes…or no shoes at all!"

WHACK! "DEAL WITH IT!" Aeren said, fist smoking. Inuyasha fell to the ground.

Miroku had trouble tying his roller-skates. Not just because Nickamo was glued to him, but because he kept sucking up the skates with his wind tunnel. Inuyasha was also having trouble. Seeing as he doesn't wear shoes, he had no idea how to tie laces and kept shredding them with Iron Reaver.

"Let me do it!" Aeren said, flustered. (Getting annoyed with how long it was taking him)

Inuyasha and Aeren skated out onto the floor. It was conveniently empty, other than the other peoples that we know are there. Nickamo was skating happily and jumping and spinning and other fantastical things. Poor Miroku, he was trailing behind, trying to keep his balance and kept falling and being dragged across the skating parlor. Sango sat in the corner moping because Nickamo had managed to get out of her trap. Kirara snuck away with one of her skates and began rolling around the parlor.

BAM! Inuyasha fell down yet again. He couldn't even stand up while wearing roller-skates. Aeren came to help him yet again. After many bruises, scrapes, and many happy frolicking moments, they all left the Happy Skating Parlor.

"Can I have Tetsusaiga back?" Inuyasha asked Aeren hopeful.

"I have another idea…"

Aeren: well that's chapter two for ya!

Anameia: sorry for the huge break between updates…its hard to get 3 ppl together.

Nickamo: ROAD TRIP!

Aeren: Don't give it away! I mean….what do you think you're saying?

Anameia: I'd like to thank our reviewers for the first chapter: wolfygirl13, Kai Kitsune, Kogaismyhomeboy, and Black Kitsuna.

Nickamo: have a cookie!

Sesshomaru: a HAPPY cookie! HAPPY!

All: creeped out See Ya Next Time!


End file.

Inuyasha, Humor, Parody