That '70s Show 1. Jackie meets Jackie

**I do not own That '70s Show.**

**Not even Colette. Actually, the character of Colette is a one time character from the original show. I think it was Season 6 (maybe 5) where Jackie was the "Big Sister" for this little girl. Now, I'm pretty sure her name is Colette. Sorry if I jumbled that up. But, I just decided to pick her because she was pretty young in that episode and this story takes place in 1984. So, I figured she'd be a rebel-teen by now. In my opinion, That '70s Show works a little cleaner with some young blood in there, stirring things up. Or, at the very least, being the excuse ****_to_**** stir things up. Let me know what you think and I'll see if I could another chapter up soon. **

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><p><strong>Whatever Happened to Eric and Donna? <strong>

**CH1. Jackie meets Jackie**

Colette Ripley sat by herself in a booth at the HUB. Earlier her and her friends were laughing, messing around and if their parents ever got wise and asked what they were doing, they'd all answer the same way- "We were studying!" But now her friends had filed out of the HUB, one by one they all had gone home.

She looked around the HUB attentively, admiringly. This place had been open since 1954, originally titled "The Pub" by an Irish family who owned it. That didn't last long though, in '65 Freddy and Frank Hoffman came back from the wars in Vietnam and Korea and bought the place and renamed it. Instead of selling beer to old ground kissers, they decided to make it more of a malt, hamburger and teenage hangout because, according to Freddy at least, they saw teens as "the wave, man. The customers. That's what the modern teen is, man and those who don't recognize it don't get the dough."

Yeah, she knew all this because she had to do a paper on historical sites in Point Place. Her History teacher was hoping she would do the museum or the new art gallery that opened up and do a paper on how it "could" be Point Place's next tourist attraction. Pft, she'd rather do the HUB. Her teacher was sourly disappointed, especially since she saw Colette as "one of the brightest minds Point Place has ever produced!" But Colette was adamant, if she was gonna do a paper about some soggy, rundown building in this crappy town whose only tourists were the travelers who got lost goin' to some place better, she was picking the HUB. Besides, she had an argument- after 30 years in business, it was closing.

So, she sat in her booth, compiling her notes for her paper. She was quiet, keeping to herself and didn't even care that it was 8:56 PM. Her mother was always out at all odd hours; working to support her five kids and she never had a father. And Colette, the middle child, was going through that point in every teenage girl's life where she couldn't get along with her mother at all. She'd rather stay at the HUB until it closed, which was 10:00 PM, by the way.

"Um, excuse me, what do you mean by _'we don't sell that here'_? This is a restaurant, kind of, so why don't you sell salads? What's your excuse? Too cheap?"

That high pitched remark clawed itself into Colette's eardrums. She looked up, scrunching her face in the process. Who the hell was this woman who dragged her out of her 'school zone' mode? The reason she liked the HUB since she was a little girl was because not that many people came here, not like in the '70s anyways. Well, now that she thought about it, maybe that's why it was closing.

The man behind the counter groaned at the brunette woman, "Well missy, if you want a salad so badly, may I suggest walking yer pretty 'lil ass outside and eating some grass with the rest of the cows?"

Colette smirked. Besides herself, the woman was the only customer and she wasn't bad looking at all. She may have been a little short compared to the other women of Point Place, but she was thin, shapely, and the back of her head looked alright. In fact, her hair was so well done that Colette wouldn't have been surprised if the woman was pretty looking. Too bad she was stuck up. If High School taught Colette anything was that the prettiest girls with the best clothes were always bitches. Always. There was not one single exception.

The woman shrieked, "Cows? Okay, you are definitely hitting a little too low. Both of us here know that I am not chunky. Believe me, I've seen some big girls in my time." And then the woman paused, thinking aloud, "Even my best friend from High School was pretty big boned." She then smirked, "You should've seen her skinny, dorky boyfriend. He was way too small for her. They looked so weird together." And then her smirk faded away, "They were actually a good couple. Huh…"

The man rolled his eyes. He fixed his grease stained apron, completely ignoring the woman, "Yeah, yeah. High School's over, chicky. Build a bridge and get over it."

"Well! I've never!" The woman huffed, insulted. She turned on her heel ready to make a dramatic exit while she melodramatically fumed, "Maybe your poor customer service and out of date menus is why you people are going out of business! And you know what? I don't care! Like you said- High School's over!"

Colette dropped her pen. She was staring at the altercation between the two; she completely forgot she was holding it. The woman was so riled up she turned toward Colette, snapping, "What're you look-"

Colette was just a regular teenager with messy, long brown hair, an overgrown sweater, who wore tattered blue jeans and red sneakers. She was no threat.

The woman caught herself, quickly apologizing to Colette, "Oh. I'm so sorry! I just…it's been a really bad week."

She made her way over to Colette, gripping her purse strap so it wouldn't fall off. When she reached Colette, she took out her hand, saying decently, "Sorry, again. I'm Jackie by the way."

Jackie?

Hadn't she heard that name before? And this woman seemed oddly familiar…

Colette took Jackie's hand uneasily.

"I'm Colette, miss."

Jackie rolled her eyes, telling the girl, "Oh please. I'm not that much older than you. I'm only 23. Which has me asking, how old are you?"

Colette retrieved her hand, shrugging, "I'm 17."

Jackie then gave Colette a strange look before admitting, "Your face seems familiar, but I can't seem to place it. Are you on the cheerleading squad at the High School?"

Colette caught herself blushing. She wasn't and her oldest brother's girlfriend who was the captain four years back didn't let her forget it. Colette actually tried out. She didn't make it.

"Er, no." She confessed as her lips twisted every which way in embarrassment.

The woman thought for a second. She then nodded, smiling, "Oh, I get it. You were a girl scout or something, right? Perhaps I bought some cookies from you? Of course I didn't eat them. More than likely I gave them to Fez."

Again Colette was averting her eyes from this woman. As a child she was more trouble than she was worth- not exactly "girl scout" material.

"I don't think so." Was all she could say.

Jackie sighed heavily, placing her hands on her hips and tapping her foot impatiently. She asked, more to herself than to anyone, "Then who are you?"

Colette didn't get that Jackie asked a rhetorical question. She then answered for the second time, "I'm Colette."

Jackie nodded, "Uh-huh, I know that already but for some reason your name isn't registering."

Colette simply shrugged, going back to her homework, "Okay. Then, whatever."

But Jackie wouldn't go away. She kept insisting, "But I do know you. I feel it. It's a shame I can't place you."

Colette couldn't concentrate on her work because this woman who kept claiming they knew each other wouldn't let her work. She really wanted to look up and tell the woman, "Please go. I have school stuff." But that was too rude. Even for her. So instead Colette looked up and asked, "Do you have kids that you need to rush home to or something?"

Jackie shook her head dejectedly as she sighed sadly, "No. Sorry to disappoint. No marriage, no kids and I was recently let go from my promising career as an aspiring photographer." And after a brief moment, Jackie found herself day-dreaming, "When I was your age I pictured myself already happily married, maintaining the mansion and the help, and looking after my tiny Michael Kelso's and little Jackie Burkhart's."

As she said the last part, her eyes fell on the girl sitting at the booth in front of her. And at the second it hit her like a rock.

_"Little Jackie?!"_ Jackie excitedly squealed, "Ohmygod! Is that you?! Yer all grown up!"

Her answer was Colette's blank face.

Little who?

For the third time, Colette told her, "My name is Colette."

Jackie ignored her as she smiled with pride, "Look at you. To think that I had a hand in your upbringing must've been life changing for you."

Colette shot her a tight smile, "I'm sorry. I think you're wrong again and it's pretty late. I should be getting back or my brother's will be out looking for me." As Colette began collecting her items that were spread all over the table, Jackie feverishly explained, "No-no! This time I'm right! Listen, do you remember when you were younger, like eleven or twelve or something? You were in something like the _Big Brothers/Big Sisters_ program?"

Colette froze. She then slowly looked up with curious brown eyes, "How the heck did you know that?"

Jackie beamed, "Because I was your Big Sister! I was, pardon my language_, Big_ Jackie and you were _Little _Jackie!"

And then it all came rolling back to Colette. She squinted her eyes at the older woman, saying slowly, "That. Was. You?"

Jackie nodded up and down cheerfully, "Yup!"

Colette said very deliberately, "They found me in that stupid cop car! Because of you I had a criminal record for breaking into vehicles! I had to bone up on several law books to get my record expunged! I'm only 17 and I had to deal with that crap! My mother gave me the worst beating in my life because of you and your strung up friends!"

Jackie paused, thinking back, "That's right. But, that wasn't on me. You see, Donna was the one to blame. You two were playing hide and seek and she lost you."

Colette rolled her eyes, "I was in your care and you just pawned me on to your buddy? I'm sorry but that was so irresponsible and definitely on you!" Before Jackie could respond, Colette continued, obviously pissed, "And another thing- how could **you ditch me**?! For the next three years I had to deal with this crazy chick named Caroline as my new big sister! When I did something wrong, she would hold her breath and I would get really freaked out! The last time I saw her, she was hospitalized!"

Colette then folded her arms across her chest, her face twisting into a disapproving scowl that made her seem older than what she really was, "Thanks a bunch, sis. Glad to know you had a helpful 'hand in my upbringing'."

Jackie turned away from the girl, guiltily.

Pause.

Colette rolled her brown eyes, rising from her seat as she arranged all her notes in a neat stack.

Trying to be cheerful, Jackie asked in a 'happy' tone, "So, whatcha doin'?"

Colette groaned, avoiding Jackie's figure completely, "I _was_ hanging out with my friends instead of doing this stupid report. Maybe if I'd done what my mother wanted me to, to begin with, and done my homework at the library instead of goofing off here at the HUB for hours then maybe I would be over there and not here. Maybe I would be done already. Either way…" She looked up at Jackie, staring directly into her different colored eyes, "I wouldn't have bumped into you."

Jackie heard this and couldn't help the next words that flew out of her mouth.

"Little Jackie, look: I apologize that I haven't kept in touch with you, but I'm not your mother. It's not my job to take care of you."

Colette laughed madly for a second before shaking her head. Bitterly she retorted as she shoved her notes into her backpack, "No. You are not my mother. My mother works her ass off to support her two overgrown, delinquent sons and their bitchy girlfriends- all who were supposed to find work but are too damn lazy to do squat. And, she also supports me and my younger brothers, both of whom frequently skip school and do drugs." Colette then shot at Jackie like a bullet, "My mother is a better woman than you'll ever be."

"Why the hell are you so mad?!"

"Because!" Colette growled, zipping up her backpack and threw it carelessly around her shoulder, "Despite our rough start, I really liked you! I really thought we had a real bond! And then, and then…and then I wound up in jail and you let me rot! I had to wait hours until my mom showed up! She was overworked; sleep deprived, and pissed off!" And just like that Colette reverted back to that preteen little girl Jackie recognized. In a very innocent and hurt tone, Colette sighed, "You were supposed to be my big sister…and you just left."

After a tense pause, Jackie spoke up.

"It sucks, doesn't it?"

Colette looked at Jackie with a confused face.

"What?"

Jackie admitted, scratching her chin awkwardly, "I-I kinda know what it's like to have someone who's there…who looks after you and that you care about. Someone that, despite yourself, you can't help but look up to. The same someone who just ups and leaves. Granted Donna gave me a month of fair warning before she took off to the wild blue yonder and she does send the occasional letter every six or so months, but it still stings."

It appeared as if Colette was ignoring her as she brushed passed Jackie and walked toward the exit of the HUB. But as Jackie's words sunk in, she stopped cold. And then she slowly turned around to face the twenty-three year old woman in front of her.

"Donna? Was she that redheaded chick with the big jacket?"

Jackie smirked as she thought back to the time her, Donna and Little Jackie spent time at the HUB together. But besides the fact that most of the banter that day was arguing and Donna turning Little Jackie against her, it was a fairly nice memory of better times in her life.

Jackie nodded, "Yeah. I always did think of her as a masculine woman…like Eric."

"Eric?" Colette asked, "Who's that?"

"He was Donna's ultra-feminine boyfriend."

Colette recollected, "That skinny guy? I think I remember him! All he talked about was Star Wars, his mother and his girlfriend."

Jackie dryly agreed, "I see you do remember him."

And then Colette paused. A question suddenly forming, "Say, whatever happened to them?"

Jackie thought about for a quick moment before saying, "That's a good question."

Colette shrugged off that subject and continued, "So…I guess you're still too busy for a kid like me to tag around, huh?"

Jackie explained, "Well, I'm currently looking for a job, any job really, that'll pay my rent. So tomorrow I'm going to look around and-"

Colette, let down, understood, "Oh. Yeah, you should probably do that."

And then Jackie saw it plain as day. Colette was reaching out to her. And Jackie already screwed up being a "big sister" once, and she wasn't one to repeat mistakes-most of the time. That lesson was painfully engrained in her skull as the mistakes that were Steven Hyde and Michael Kelso. And lastly, so what if that Big Brother/Big Sister program was buried deep in their past, it didn't matter. Colette, as Jackie saw it anyway, would always be Little Jackie to her- no matter how old they were.

From her purse, Jackie took out a small business card and wrote an address on the back of it with the pen she kept on the side pocket of her purse. She swiftly handed the card over to Colette, attempting to say in the most professional tone ever, "You can reach me at this address."

Her voice betrayed her underlined nervousness. It almost was five or six years since she practically abandoned Little Jackie like how her own mother left her. What if Little Jackie would hold this against her?

But her fears were washed away when Colette took the card, smirking, "Amateur photographer? According to this, you worked for the _Kenosha Sun_."

Jackie corrected, "I never said 'amateur.' I said 'aspiring'- just like everyone else in the world, Little Jackie."

Colette rolled her eyes, smirking. For the fourth time that day she sighed, "My name is Colette."

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><p><strong>There's this story by Neil Gaiman and Andy Kubert called, 'Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?' Basically everyone from the different Batman 'universes' all bid farewell to their personal versions of Batman. And several characters step forward and tell a story of how "their" Batman died. Some stories are similar, some are different. But, the thing is, I look back at the finale and everyone around me is convinced that Eric and Donna did got back together. I'm not. I really, really, really want to believe they got back together, like how a kid wants to believe Santa exists, but...I don't see it. And then I pondered if the fictional residents of Point Place struggled with the question as I did. What did ever happen to Eric and Donna? <strong>

**I do not own That '70s Show.**

**Or Batman.**


	2. Kitty

**I don't own That '70s Show.**

**I'm trying to 'adjust' everyone's lives in this chapter. Jackie's with Forman's and so forth. Red, Kitty, and Hyde will also be introduced so there will be some quick touch-ups on their lives. I'm trying to make the center character Colette, but Jackie and some others will be hanging around for the most part. I'm also trying to get an 'ED' vibe without them actually making a physical appearance in the story. Let's see if I did an 'ok' job. **

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><p><strong>CH2. Kitty<strong>

It had been three days since Colette and Jackie ran into each other. Colette had finished up her paper on the HUB closing and turned it in. She got a 99. One point was deducted for not doing the paper over a "nicer and more appropriate" building.

What a load of crap. She should've gotten a 100.

Anyway, Colette was through with her homework and decided to take her extra weekend and reconnect with her "Big Sister." Needless to say she was excited. Who knew what the day had in stored for her? But then, she knocked on the front door of the house of the address Jackie had given her. Her excitement died right at the front step.

A balding older man, in his mid-fifties opened up. As soon as he saw Colette, he groaned, "More kids? They're like roaches! You manage to get rid of a few and more seem to come back!"

Colette's right foot uncomfortably began to ache, so she rubbed it against the cement of the porch. The older man was so damn intimidating and Colette always prided herself on NEVER being intimidated. Yeah, well this guy ruined her perfect record.

"Um…" Where was she going to start? "Is Jackie home?"

The man gave her an incredulous look, "Home? This is NOT Jackie's home."

Colette tried again, "Well is she here?"

The man looked over Colette for a moment. The young girl wore a white blouse with a red sweater. She wore a pair of khaki pants and red sneakers. Colette's face was full of fading freckles and her brown eyes overflowed with innocence.

The man took a step back, saying to himself, "What's going on here? She's too young to be part of the first batch of degenerates…"

And as if the universe heard him, Reginald Albert Forman-Red, got his answer.

Jackie, sporting a sleeveless black turtleneck with a beige mini skirt and black heeled boots that cut off just above her ankle appeared behind Red. She had just finished doing her makeup and hair and felt a bit more liberated knowing how attractive she looked- especially with Hyde still staying in the Forman basement. Her ex would have to sit through an entire breakfast meal with her looking stunning as usual.

Jackie peeked over Red's shoulder and smiled at Colette, "Little Jackie! Come on in!"

Red shook his head, pointing at Colette, "No. You can stay on out."

And then he turned to Jackie, "And you. What's the big idea? You've barely been back a week from flunking out in Kenosha and already you're giving away this address to anyone you spot on the street? You don't even live here! And the only reason you're staying is because Kitty couldn't stand the thought of you roaming the hills of Wisconsin by yourself!"

Jackie merely smirked before pressing her lips on Red's cheek like if she was his own daughter.

Red flinched, shouting, "Don't even think that sweet, girly crap is gonna work on me! I was in the war dammit! I'm made of much stronger stuff!"

Jackie completely ignored his last comment and giggled, "Mr. Forman, can my protégé please eat breakfast with us?"

Red shook his head, closing his eyes, "No. Absolutely not."

Pause.

He opened one eye and saw Jackie, staring at him with arms folded and with a very disapproving look. He then opened his other eye to see skinny looking Colette. He knew what he had to do and he didn't like it one bit.

"Dammit." He groaned before asking Colette, "You haven't eaten a decent meal, have you?"

"No." The younger girl admitted shyly, looking down. Her stupid brothers pigged out and ate all the cereal, milk, and eggs. She guessed she could've eaten ham but there were two problems with that. The first was that the ham was expired and stunk like hell. The second was that she was allergic to ham.

Red opened the Forman's front door all the way, stepping silently aside for Colette to come in.

"Thank you, Mr. Forman!" Jackie chirped, grabbing Colette's arm and leading her into the living room. As the two went into the kitchen, Red could be heard closing the front door and grumbling, "Why do they always wind up on my doorstep? What the hell's wrong with the Lewis's or the Donohue's?"

Upon reaching the Forman kitchen, Colette's senses were happily awakened at the smells and sights of all the delicious breakfast dishes Mrs. Forman was preparing. There was small, round, thick Swedish pancakes; there were tiny plates of butter, a canister of honey-sickle syrup, and there were the greatest looking eggs next to the longest strips of sizzling bacon Colette had ever seen. And resting on the round breakfast table were tiny bowls of blueberries, strawberries, and apple slices. And Next to the bowls were two old fashioned pitchers. One was marked for milk, the other for orange juice. And by the counter, between the refrigerator and the microwave a fresh pot of coffee stood perfectly still, and by the scent of it, just brewed.

Did she die and go to heaven?

Colette blinked, her stomach growling and her mouth watering.

Jackie smiled at her, saying, "Yeah, the first time I was over for breakfast I had the same face."

Kitty looked up from stirring the eggs. She happily greeted them, "Oh Jackie! I was so busy I didn't hear you come in!" And then she noticed Colette, "Aw! You have a new little friend! Well, honey, what's your name?"

Before Colette could regain her speech, Jackie answered for her, "This is Little Jackie, my apprentice." Jackie then wrapped her arm tightly around Colette, proclaiming bravely, "I am taking her under my tutelage and molding her into a well-adjusted, happy adult-like me!"

Kitty blinked a bit before laughing, "A-ha, ha, ha, ha-ha! Okay then, you go do that."

Before Jackie could ask what was so funny, another man walked into the kitchen, but he came from the basement. He was a medium built man with broad shoulders. Unfortunately for him, even though he still had a few youthful features in his face, he was already showing the beginnings of a beer belly. It was possible he was aware of this fact because he was wearing a black hoodie in what looked to Colette as him trying to hide his stomach. And she didn't think he was trying to hide his shirt, who in their right minds would hide a shirt like him? From the unzipped upper part of his sweater, she could tell he was wearing a _Beatles_ T-shirt. From what she could see, it looked like the cover of their album _Revolver_.

With one hand in his blue jean side pockets and the other on his ruffled, dark brown hair, the man coughed, "Good morning, Mrs. Forman."

Kitty beamed, "And good morning to you too, Steven!"

The man scratched his bearded chin, his blue eyes looking everywhere else in the room except where Jackie and Colette stood. Kitty noticed this.

While the mother hen turned off the stove and began setting up the plates, she asked Hyde slowly, "Steven, honey? Don't you think you're forgetting to tell someone else 'good morning'?"

He looked around the room, puzzled for a moment before his eyes fell on Colette. He gave a short nod, "Good morning."

Kitty put down her spatula, obviously upset (as was Jackie) that he was being so rude.

"Steven." Kitty warned, "Jackie is in the room with us. Wouldn't it be nice to wish her a happy 'good morning'?"

He shrugged, not really seeming to give a damn, as he responded, "It would be nice to wish her a happy 'good bye'."

He then took out a pair of black aviators and slid them up the brim of his nose as to shield his eyes.

Kitty sighed patiently, "Steven-"

But Jackie cut her off with, "No, Mrs. Forman, its okay." She was clearly hurt and her eyes showed it, but she didn't let them weal up with tears as she coldly shot at Hyde, "I'm used to Hyde's immature behavior even though it's been like, **five **years since we were together."

Hyde emotionlessly smirked, "See Mrs. Forman? She's used to it, now-" Hyde changed the subject, popping his knuckles, "-what's for breakfast?"

Kitty went back to preparing the plates, saying out loud, "Honestly Steven, I don't know what has gotten into you the past week. Usually you're so nice and helpful around the house!"

At that moment Red came in from the dining room area, rolling up a newspaper. He turned toward Hyde, asking seriously and in his boisterous manner, "Whatever it is, it better not have anything to do with-" With his rolled up newspaper, Red pointed at Jackie, finishing, "The arrival of this one, or does it?"

Hyde nodded, answering honestly, "Might."

Red paused, eyeing him slowly. And then, the older man told him in a fatherly voice, "Steven, I like you a whole lot more than I do my own son, and I think much of you as a man, so when I tell you to-" Red's voice boomed like a loud speaker, causing all the women to jump and for Kitty to drop a small portion of egg on the floor as he shouted, "GET YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS BEFORE MY FOOT DECIDES TO JOIN IT!" And then Red cleared his voice, going back to his fatherly tone, "You know I'm just trying to help. So, got that?"

Kitty gently hit Red's shoulder, hissing, "Red! You scared me! Now I have breakfast all over the floor!"

And that was when Hyde softly groaned and stood up. He told Kitty, "It's alright Mrs. Forman. I'll clean it up."

He made his way over to the pantry to take out a dustpan and broom while Kitty cooed, "Oh, Red! Isn't he the sweetest thing?!"

And Colette could've sworn the curly haired man's cheeks turned a light shade of crimson.

Kitty then turned toward the girls, "Would you two care to take your seats at the table?"

Colette asked awkwardly, "Are you sure it's okay, ma'am? I mean, you were making breakfast for four and I wouldn't want to intrude."

Kitty shook her head, a smile bubbling to her lips, "Nonsense! There's always room for one more at the Forman household!"

At that, Red rolled his eyes, "And she's not kidding either. She literally makes room."

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><p>Twenty minutes later and everyone was still eating their food, and Colette felt rather shy about finishing before everyone-twice.<p>

"So," She started, hoping to turn their attention away from her and her fast eating habits (when one lives with four males, one learns to eat swiftly and just swallow the food), "How many children do you have, Mrs. Forman?"

Kitty immediately answered, "Three. The first is Laurie, she just came back from…well…"

The truth was, no one knew where Laurie ran off to in the latter half of the '70s. All they knew was that she had recently returned a few years back, right around the time Fez and Jackie broke up and Jackie moved to Kenosha after obtaining a job. As far as anyone saw, Jackie moved out one day and Laurie moved in with Fez the next.

Kitty shook her head, dismissing everything, "It doesn't matter. All that matters is that she's back in Point Place. She's trying to get a job but with her work ethic…well…yeah." Kitty changed the subject, "And Steven here is the sole owner of _Grooves_!"

Colette was impressed, "The record store? No way! I love your stuff, but I assumed that guy with mane of hair owned it since I always see him there."

Hyde shook his head, "Randy? Nah. He's like, my manager."

Colette raised her eyebrow, "Still man, that's awesome! My friends and I go there all the time and stuff!"

Kitty then took a sip out of her glass of milk, "Oh, and Eric! I almost forgot about my little baby. He's…um…he's…." She really didn't know what Eric was up to come to think of it.

Jackie, who was seated on Kitty's direct left asked, "Don't you know where he's at, Mrs. Forman?"

Red stopped eating and looked at his wife cautiously. Kitty, after a moment, shook her head, "I really don't know…." She turned to Hyde suddenly, "Steven?"

Hyde shrugged, "Beats me. Last time I saw him, he was having sex with-" He caught himself and immediately tried to rectify it in mid-sentence, "having, um, _chess_. He was playing _chess_ with Donna the eve of New Years 1980."

Red rolled his eyes, knowing full well that Hyde slipped up. Kitty knew as well, the difference was she was trying really hard to believe that Eric really would play chess with Donna at a New Year's party. And Jackie could only smirk at everyone's reactions, especially Hyde who was not used to screwing up in front of everyone.

Hyde lightly took a sip of his coffee, nodding, "I believe it was a good game. I think Donna won."

Red groaned, "Geez! Do you people think we were born yesterday? We all know that Eric and Donna-"

"_RED!"_ Kitty shouted desperately. Everyone then turned toward her. She awkwardly told her husband, "Whether we know it or not doesn't mean we should _say_ it. That's not breakfast table talk and I will not stand for it in my kitchen! I cook family meals here!"

Red groaned, "Okay-okay, I'm just saying, don't lie to us!"

Kitty shook her head, "Well when the truth is what it is I, for one, would prefer the lies!"

Colette then chimed in, "Well, if no one knows what happened to him, why don't you all get into contact with his girlfriend?"

Hyde shook his head, explaining, "Wouldn't work. They officially severed ties that New Year's."

The newcomer interrupted, "But you said-"

Hyde explained to the girl, trying to use 'breakfast talk' for Kitty's sake and be mindful of his words, "Yeah. They did do it, but it was more like a 'last hurrah' thing then it was a 'let's get back together' deal."

Colette shook her head, "And they just went their separate ways? Just like that? After a lifetime of knowing each other?"

Kitty, drinking her milk, bitterly retorted, "All I know was that while my baby was in Africa, that fabricated blond practically paraded around here with her new boy toy-Randy!"

Colette asked, very much confused, "Blond?"

Jackie filled in, "Donna dyed her hair yellow. I personally saw it as a step up from her classic trucker display."

Kitty shook her head, "Step down if you ask me. All she did was whore herself around, flaunting those-those_ jugs_ and shaking those hips to any man that stumbled passed her way!" She then added, "I'm surprised the milkman was left in one piece!"

Red, again, stopped eating and looked up at his wife. Hyde just gave her a quizzical look, "_That's_ breakfast table talk?"

An excited Kitty ignored him, going on, telling Colette, "In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if she was something similar to Steven's stripper wife! Or worse- a jogger!"

Colette couldn't believe it, turning to Hyde she asked, "You were married?"

And right when he and Jackie were about to answer, Kitty thought out loud, "I bet I can even guess what that harpy is up to today!"

**Kitty's Thoughts:**

New York City

A woman in a skimpy outfit ran through the dark streets. Her heels clacked every two feet as she kept running in a direction she wasn't even sure of. Behind her a cloud of men hurried, screaming and calling her name, begging her to go back to them.

Her breath kept coming in short puffs, sweat caking on her forehead as she ran into the nearest alley she could find. The men's voices grew louder as she rounded another corner in the alley. From above, rusty apartments towered over her. The women who lived there threw their dirty water at her, scowling at her and calling her names for what she did to their husbands.

She managed to avoid the water, but stopped when the alley reached a dead end. For a second she stared at the wall in silence before letting out a painful howl. She then turned around, eager to get out as quickly as she went in, but only saw a rat blocking her exit.

It was a big rat. A big, grey, sewer rat the size of her head. It glared at her with its tiny red eyes before hissing madly. It waved it's long, hairless tail at her before scampering off under a diseased ridden mattress with several brown stains on it.

Passing the mattress was the only way to leave the alley, but she was worried that if she did, the rat would come out. Maybe it had rabies. Maybe it would biter her.

The noise from the men grew louder and angrier, all calling out her name to finish what she started. But she had no desire to. She was through throwing away her life, and she just had to get out.

She bolted passed the mattress as fast as she could and ran to the other end of the alley. She kept hearing their grunts and swears as she banged on any door she could find, crying out for them to open up. But every time a descent woman would see her, with her caked on make-up and phony eye lashes and dirty blond hair, they would just shake their heads and lock up their door extra tight. They even turned off their outside lights to make the alleyway extra dark.

She kept running though, her heels clacking louder than ever as she stepped in a puddle of murky water. Her hands began to shake; growing frantic at the possibility of what those men would do to her once they caught up with her. What her past would do to her once it caught up to her.

She could feel her eyes tense up and water. She could feel her heart accelerate. Goosebumps crawled all through her back as she painfully became aware that those men were going to find her. And they were going to do unspeakable things to her.

She saw one last door at the farthest end of the alley. She sprinted to it, landing incorrectly on her left heel and falling because of it. She fell hard, scraping one of her knees. But she wasn't going to give up- not again.

She flung her heels in the opposite direction and struggled to get back on her feet. With the cold, wet gravel ground piercing the flesh under her feet, she walked hurriedly toward her very last hope.

There were two warped, wooden steps in front of the door that she forced herself to walk on. She tried her best not to even look at her knees, knowing full well what she would see. She knocked on the door, hoarsely calling out for someone to help her. She needed someone to get her out of this hellhole.

The inside door opened, leaving the screen door locked and still keeping her out.

Soon the kitchen lamp flickered on and her heart nearly stopped.

"Eric?"

The man inside stepped away, as if worried about something, "Donna."

The noise of the other men grew deafly apparent and he couldn't help but ask, "What happened?"

She answered the only way she knew how, "I don't know."

Almost immediately he opened the door for her, helping her inside. He locked both the inside and the outside doors and did the only thing he could to leave the other men outside in total darkness in the alley- he turned off the outside lights.

He then turned to her, noticing her bleeding all over the kitchen floor. But he noticed what she was wearing first.

"Why are you wearing that…that _**costume**_?"

She leaned against one of his walls, slowly setting herself down on the ground to catch her breath.

"Donna, what the hell is going on?!" He shrieked, close to banging on his small, circular kitchen table. She said nothing but averted her eyes from him, choosing to stare at the tiny icebox that served as his refrigerator instead. He knelt down in directly in front of her and whispered harshly, "Donna, there are men out there looking for you. Why are they looking for you?!"

She closed her eyes. She didn't want to cry in front of him. And she wasn't going to.

Eric angrily demanded, "Answer Me!"

"This isn't a costume." She said softly. She then turned her cold eyes directly on him as she said sternly, "It's my uniform. For my job."

Eric couldn't help himself as he spat, "Which is what exactly? Being a whore?"

With clenched teeth she growled, "Well aren't you Mr. High and Mighty today. I guess you took some of your stupid moral fiber."

He pointed at the door, saying, "What about them? Is this what you want now? To run from a bunch of drunken men!"

She made a fist, pounding onto the floor madly. She spat at him, "You cannot judge me! I did what I had to do to stay in school! There's no money from either of my parents and I have too much pride to go and beg for it. So, I picked up a part time job." She then leaned back, trying not to sound too upset as she confessed, "Drunk, horny, married men pay the rent. How the hell was I supposed to know they'd want more than a lap-dance."

He didn't accept her answer, "What's your real reason for doing this? For hurting yourself?"

She narrowed her eyes at him, "What was your real reason for going to Africa. For hurting everyone around you?"

He turned away from her, mumbling, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"The hell you don't." She mumbled, her hand covering her bleeding knee. He stared at her knee thoughtfully for a moment before getting up, saying, "Let me get something for that."

While he was gone, she really took in the sights of the kitchen. It was very small, yellow, and not too furnished. Maybe the rest of the apartment was that way. But there was one thing she did notice. He put cheese graders on the wall next to the door she spilled in from. Even here in New York, it felt like the Forman's.

A pang of guilt her gut as she leaned forward, trying to catch her breath. When he came back she watched quietly as he cleaned out her knee with Hydrogen Peroxide. It stung a little, but far less than her pride. And then she saw him carefully wrap up her knee in some bandages he must've had in his restroom.

Neither of them said a word as he did this simple gesture for her. And she really wanted to thank him, but both of them knew she never would. Like she said earlier, she had too much pride to be a decent person, and too little to be a real human being.

"Why're you here in New York?" She asked, finding that after all these years she just wanted to talk to him.

Eric shrugged, never taking his eyes off his bandaging, "You wouldn't believe it."

"Try me."

Eric looked up doubtfully before smiling, "I'm finding myself."

Donna cocked her eyebrow skeptically, "In New York? What? You'd thought you'd find yourself at the Statue of Liberty or something?"

Eric sat down next to her, shaking his head, "No, think about it. This place is rich with people and culture. Different people. Different cultures. I could learn here, be a teacher as well as a student! Learn of what it is like on this world. You see, Donna, I've been searching for so long for an answer- for a reason to be alive when the answer was there all along. And even though I wasn't sure of the question, I needed the answer! I needed to get in touch with what truly mattered- my fellow man."

She just stared at him with a stumped face. He then added, "And women, of course."

Her lips pursed, her eyes glazing down to the tile floor, "So let me get this straight…you were searching for an answer for a question you weren't even sure about and that's why you ran away to Africa? That's why you're here in New York?"

Eric nodded, smiling, "Yes! To learn and explore more! To find if weather or not there truly is a force!"

She made a face, finding herself growing angrier by the second, "_**A**** Force**_? This better be Physics, Eric."

Eric shook his head, trying to get her to understand as he waved his hands about, "As in _Star Wars,_ Donna. Think about it- what if we were all connected like in-"

She almost lost it.

"Well, while you were globetrotting around the universe and in your figurative Millennium Falcon searching for answers- I was struggling without you Eric!" She ran her weary hand through her blond strands, laughing incredulously, "To think I could only think about you for all these years…and all you thought about was 'getting in touch' with a bunch of people who probably thought you were off yer rocker!"

Eric shook his head, trying to get her to realize, "Listen Donna, there are so many possibilities out there. We, as a race, are on the cusp of something much bigger than ourselves, something much stronger! Could you imagine a TV, a radio and phone all as the same thing? Look, I went to this seminar of what the future could bring and-"

She really wanted nothing more than to slap him right now. She fumed, "Eric! A TV, a radio and a phone is just that! A TV, a radio and stupid, freakin' phone! They are all separate entities! You can't combine them! That's just wishful thinking that doesn't have anything to do with anything!"

"I'm serious, Donna." Eric tried again, leaning closer, "There is an edge out there! A silver lining. A horizon where with this new technology we can finally connect not only the world, but perhaps one day learn the truth behind the origin of the human race. I've taken a peek and it's wonderful. You would've loved it. You should've been there-"

She cut him off, snapping, "Maybe I would've if you didn't leave me behind."

He paused for a moment, his mouth hanging open lamely. In the next second he shut it, looking away from her and rubbing the back of his head.

After another moment, she let out a breath, "Eric, I can't do this anymore and yet…and yet, I can't move on. What the hell does your stupid seminar have to say about that? Will your newfound theories and toys finally find a way to treat loneliness? To remedy the anguish and sadness that the human spirit needs to know what happiness truly is? To be one with yourself and another? Will it change Love and Hate? Will it 'cure' us from the very thing that makes us flawed and wonderful to begin with? Will it cure us of living? And will we forget how to be human in the process?"

"I don't know what you mean." He said gently, his voice barely audible as she placed a hand on his leg, "When was the last time you called your mother since your personal quest started?"

He looked up, his mouth dry, "I…can't remember."

She shook her head at him, "You can't even pick up a phone and you already want to hook up a TV and radio to it."

She sighed, asking him slowly, "Why're you even doing this?"

"Because," he started shakily, "Because I'm trying to find the answer!"

"What the hell's the question, Eric?"

"Why am I-" He looked away at her, focusing on the edge of the kitchen table, "Why am I so miserable?"

She looked over her hands. Chipped finger nail polish sprinkled her outfit. With her left hand she rubbed her cheek. When she looked over those fingers she saw the residue of one of the layers of foundation she had applied earlier that night.

She chuckled at the insanity of it all.

"You? At least you were trying." She took in a deep breath, trying to sort it all out in her mind, "I was more lost than you. I had sex with men I don't even know. I've degraded myself because I thought that if I could hurt myself, I could hurt you." She then looked up at him, blinking back the tears, "_**I**_ am miserable, Eric."

The noise from outside picked up again, the men's voices drawing closer.

He watched the door with a certain look in his eyes that words could never capture. He then took in a deep breath, wondering, "What happened to us, Donna?"

The voices outside were so loud; they both knew that these men were just outside the door. As their anger drowned out Eric and Donna's thoughts, Donna reached out and turned his chin toward her. His eyes soon followed, a very sad expression hidden in his features.

She suggested softly, "Let's just be miserable together."

She pulled him closer to her for one last kiss before-

**Kitty's Thoughts End**

"The End!" Kitty shouted as she patted the breakfast table.

Everyone broke out at once, Colette's voice the most distinguishable as she cried out, " 'Let's be miserable together'? That's horrible!"

Jackie had a hand raised, "Wait a minute, was Donna a stripper or what? Because I've seen her try to be sexy and believe you me, it is one of the top three saddest things I've ever saw! It's right next to a blind puppy and the creation of the IRS."

Hyde scrounged up his face, "So why was Forman interested in 'finding himself' all of a sudden?"

Red agreed, "My son better not be a damn Hippie!"

Kitty tried to explain, "I put Donna that way because of how she dirtied up my little boy! Even in the end she was all over him! And my Eric was a good boy-"

Red commented, "Well, if you don't like Donna, why did you give her that line about mentioning you?"

Everyone nodded their approval of this question while Kitty shook her head, "Because! Because I….I…Because!"

Colette raised her fork, asking, "So were they gonna get busy at the end or were they getting back together-?"

Kitty shook her head, stating firmly, "That is no one's business and I most certainly will not get any further into this topic! And besides, I'm too much of a lady to report the next event, but knowing that Donna..."

After a short pause, Red asked his wife slowly, "Kitty, we need to have a good, long conversation over the definition of 'breakfast talk'."

Jackie then turned to Colette, "We're usually not this crazy around here."

Hyde nodded, raising his glass, "Damn right. Usually it's worse. It's pretty tame this morning."

Jackie shot him a nasty look.

Kitty shook her head, upset, "It's just…I cared for her as if she were my very own! When Bob and Midge would leave for long periods of time I let her stay here with us and break bread on this very table! When Midge left, I took care of her and tried to be the mother she never had! I taught her how to make classic, home-made waffles dammit! And her and Eric were so close I…I just couldn't believe how she moved on so fast when my baby left. And I knew how much Eric cared for her that it just hurt, because it didn't seem…as if it meant nothing to her though I think it did and I…I, um," Colette, as did the rest, saw Kitty's expressions contort with all sorts of mixed emotions, especially pain. She dabbed her left eye with a napkin, saying, "Excuse me everyone."

Her eyes grew watery as she cleared her throat, taking Hyde's plate, "Steven, honey, you're done. I'll just go and wash-"

Hyde put his arm around her, telling her, "It's okay Mrs. Forman. I'll do it."

Red uncomfortable looked down as Kitty shrugged, admitting, "Laurie used to send letters. Most were full of sarcastic remarks, but she still sent them so that I knew my first baby was safe out there. And Eric called while he was in Africa. He knew it was long-distance, but he still called me every single day. And Steven here, well," She reached over and patted Hyde's cheek gently, laughing a little, "Oh, a-ha, he's just my little protector. Always around and helping around the house." She then stared at the orange juice pitcher, letting out a sad sigh, "I thought Donna would be more appreciative. But, she just packed her bags and left New Year's Day. She thanked me and promised me she would call the house if anything important came up. That was four years ago. I haven't heard a word since. And I just…oh I don't know. I guess it would be nice if I knew that somewhere out there she was at least thinking of us."

She gave a small shrug, "If Eric was thinking of us."

A stiff silenced followed as Red told his wife, as if no one else was around, "It's not your fault, Kitty. And, it's not Donna's either. Now, I'm not saying I condone what she did, but it must be pretty hard for her, picking up the pieces of her life as we all are doing. The last thing she would probably want is to be around anything that even remotely reminds her of Eric. Unfortunately, that includes us. We are her ex-boyfriends parents."

"We are far more than that." Kitty flatly said in the most serious tone anyone had ever heard from her.

Red, on the hand, took the most understanding tone, "I know. But give her time. And give Eric time. They'll come back." His voice switched to his regular gruffness as his eyes settled on Jackie as he remarked, "They _always_ do weather we want them to or not."

* * *

><p><strong>I kept thinking about it over and over and, well, over again. Who was I going to start with? And then it hit me. Not like a baseball bat or anything, but like a little light bulb. I'd start with Kitty. She was after all Eric's mother. Who would be more attatched to a boy than his mom? And besides, I figured she would be the most hurt out of anyone I could think of if any one of the kids (especially her Eric) left. But what I didn't count on was her attitude toward Donna. I know that in some episodes she had a hostile and competitive attitude for her, but at the same time cared for her as she did all the kids. I tried to incorporate aspects of both (which is why she puts Donna in her role of the story as a 'woman of the night' yet 'conscience' for Eric to begin with). I know it's very contradictory, but I think her feelings for Donna are something like that. And also Eric seems to have everything together until he opens his mouth. Like how a toddler frequently asks, "What's this?" and "How does that work?", he finds himself asking the same questions. He's too absorbed in the bigger picture that he's missing all the details of life, his mother and Donna both being those 'trivial' details. Now, for everything as a whole, I did my best to keep everyone in character and believable. Let me know what you think and I'll see ya around. <strong>

**As for a Batman fic, I'm definately thinking about it. But, it's gonna be awhile. **


	3. Red

_**I don't own That '70s Show. **_

_**I don't own anything, I really don't. **_

* * *

><p><strong>CH3. Red<strong>

Red, on the hand, took the most understanding tone, "I know. But give her time. And give Eric time. They'll come back." His voice switched to his regular gruffness as his eyes settled on Jackie as he remarked, "They _always_ do weather we want them to or not."

After a deep pause, Colette asked Red rather shyly, "Mr. Forman? Do you think that's what happened to your son and his girlfriend?"

Red thought back to Kitty's detailed story before sighing, "No."

Everyone mumbled their approval of his statement before he told them in a firm voice, "I have an idea of my own based off of the current behavior I've seen from Eric. He is our son, and his not speaking to us is different than anything those other kids can do, even Donna. It is immature, thoughtless, and rude. And if he wants time away to act like a victim instead of standing up like a real man, then he can be the victim."

Everyone mumbled their own thoughts of his statement before he told them in a firm voice, "I have an idea of my own."

Everyone groaned for the inevitable.

**Red's Thoughts:**

In a long, vacant, school hallway, a young, skinny man sloshed his mop on the blue tile floor. He thought of all his missed opportunities, his stupidity, his now wasted future and how he let his idol-his father-down by never going to college. All his dreams of being a teacher were dashed away in cloud of smoke. His only consolation was that he still did have a job at a school, like he always wanted. But, the horrible part was that he was a-

The bell rang and thousands of kids flooded the once empty corridor. One kid, just to be mean, purposefully spilt a cherry Slurpee on the floor the skinny man just cleaned. With a sigh, the skinny man went over to his little cleaning cart and tried to pull out a big, yellow "caution" sign but he couldn't.

"Ugh!" He groaned, trying to lift it while most kids who passed him pointed and giggled at him. And then he managed to jostle it out of his cart, he only got in two steps before he heard:

"Eric?"

He let go of the sign immediately and it fell, clanging to the floor.

All the kids who passed him were now roaring with laughter.

A tall, redheaded woman rushed to his aid and lifted the sign, saying a little out of breath, "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to distract you."

The skinny man now known to be Eric Forman shook his head, lying, "You-you, um…ya didn't distract me! I was just…it was just heavy."

She gave him a slight smile before asking, "Where do you want it?"

He gestured at the site of the cherry Slurpee incident.

Without hesitation she went over and opened the sign by it, and it stood upright. He felt a twinge of jealousy, all the other times he had done the same task; that damn sign fell at least three times before he could get it to stand. She did it in one minute, maybe less, on the first try.

"So," Eric started weakly, scanning her very attractive body which was in a business like attire, "Business or pleasure?"

"Huh?" She looked at him as if he grew another head.

He pointed at her clothes, everything from her baby blue business jacket and matching skirt, all the way down to her closed-toed high heels.

"Oh." She nodded, looking down at her clothes as she explained, "I had an interview today for a position at a hospital."

Eric was impressed, "Nurse? Like my mother?"

Donna shook her head, seemingly embarrassed, "Uh-no. Right now I'm still in training and I haven't gotten my PH.D or even a Master's for god's sake, but I am going to school to be a doctor. The position was just to be in the hospital and get used to the drill around there, it's mainly at the front desk and stuff."

Doctor? She was going to be a doctor and he was-

"That's good." He nodded, trying not to feel envy. She then awkwardly asked, "So…you work here?"

Eric folded his arms across his chest, forcing out a smile, "Yeah. It's great. You know how much I love kids."

In the distance, a chubby boy shouted at Eric, "Quit jawin' and clean up the red drink on the floor, Fuck-Up!"

Eric pretended not to hear the kid as he continued, "And they love me."

"You're a teacher?" She asked shakily.

"No." He said in a toneless voice.

"Oh, so yer like, still in school to be one?" She asked hopefully.

"No." He said in the same somber expression as before.

"But you're still in college?" She asked, more desperate than hopeful this time.

"No."

Donna finally forced herself to look at him in his regular clothes and wearing a dark blue apron with many pockets. He was a custodian alright; she just didn't want to believe her High School Sweetheart had fell off the peak he always stood on back in his youth.

He seemed to read her thoughts as he coldly acknowledged, "Yes. I'm a janitor."

For some reason it embarrassed her more than him and she shyly looked away. The second she did, a seven year old girl with a deep Brooklyn accent came up to her, saying, "Hey Donna. We goin' home now?"

Eric stared at the child who bore absolutely no resemblance to Donna Pinciotti. The girl had wild, black hair what was tied up in a loose bun, her skin was a shade of golden-brown and her dark eyes were always scanning everyone, as if she expected someone to suddenly rush out and take her.

Eric turned toward Donna, very surprised, "You adopted?"

Donna placed an arm around the girl, saying, "Sorta."

The girl enlightened him, "She married my dad. He's a Biochemist."

Eric almost hit the floor in shock as he managed to blubber out, "You're married?"

Donna proudly showed off her golden band, "Yup. Only two years though. We're planning on having a baby after I'm through with school." She then looked down at the girl, "Ready to go, Chelsea?"

The girl nodded, "Yeah, let's leave dis dump."

Donna shot Eric a worried smile as she ushered her step-daughter out of the school building. And all Eric could do was stand helplessly in the middle of the hallway while all the kids walked passed him and to their next class.

**End of Red's Thoughts**

Colette blinked her eyes away from Mr. Forman, concentrating on the floor while everyone braced themselves for Mrs. Forman's reaction.

All Kitty did was give Red a nasty look as she bitterly retorted, "Janitor? You made my baby a _janitor_?"

Red raised his hands in defense, "I only call it like I see it, Kitty."

The sliding door of the kitchen opened and in came Laurie and Fez, both looking worn out and ready for blood.

Hyde's aviators slid an inch off the brim of his nose as he sucked in a breath, taking in the sight of them, "Whoa."

Kitty stood up, her voice drench in concern, "My goodness! Were you two in a fight?"

"Yes." Fez panted, taking a seat on one of the bar stools by the counter as he finished, "With each other."

Laurie growled, "Me and this idiot have been arguing all damn day long!"

Colette pointed at the blond woman, turning to Jackie, "That's…."

"Laurie." Jackie explained, "Eric's older sister. And that mocha-coca mess over there-" Jackie sighed, gesturing at Fez, "is none other than-"

"Fez!" Fez announced himself proudly.

But for some reason this Fez didn't seem at all like the guy she remembered. His eyes were blood shot, his clothes were faded, his hair was a mess, and he had the faint odor of bananas for some reason. Colette couldn't help the words that fell out of her mouth, "What happened?"

Laurie snapped at Colette, "I happened and who the hell are you?!"

Jackie pointed at Colette, confidently bragging, "Lil Jackie."

Laurie snickered, "And what does that make you?** Big** Jackie?"

Jackie narrowed her eyes at her, "Well, I'd rather be Big Jackie than Big Bitch!"

Laurie took her mother's seat at the table, laughing, "Don't insult Fez, midget."

At that Fez pointed at Laurie, saying darkly, "You have insulted Fez. You have insulted Fez with your vulgar presence and you know what is worse?"

Hyde guessed, "That you're referring to yourself in third person?"

Fez shook his head, saying dramatically, "That you are using Fez's friends to get to him!"

Red took the opportunity to take a sip of coffee. Until Laurie snickered, "Oh, quit yer cryin'! I'll sleep with you tonight."

Hearing that Red spit out his drink and Fez jumped up, his old swagger crawling back into his sullen form as he happily clapped, "Aye! Yes! You can use Jackie and other friends of Fez to make fun of me any day of da week!"

Jackie rolled her eyes at Fez sarcastically, "Gee, thanks a lot, Fez."

Hyde's mouth moved to one side bitterly as he retorted, "Way to stick to yer pals."

Fez, not detecting their bitter sarcasm, nodded toward Jackie, "You are welcome, Jackie." And then to Hyde, "You too."

And then Kitty asked her daughter, "Laurie, honey-"

Laurie rolled her eyes, letting out a loud groan, "_What _is it now?"

Jackie hissed at the older girl, "That's your mother, show some respect you ungrateful brat!"

Laurie pointed at Kitty, explaining to Jackie, "My mother only calls me 'honey' when she wants something from me!"

Hyde thought out loud, "She calls me 'honey' and 'sweetie' all the time."

Laurie snarled at him, "Those are her pet name for you and Eric apparently, orphan! They are only reserved for her-" She picked up her voice and it sounded disturbingly like Kitty's, "-_little boys who are too young and weak to help themselves_!" She then snarled at Hyde, "Which is the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Like, how old are you Hyde? 46?"

Hyde narrowed his eyes behind his aviators, answering blandly, "24."

Laurie dismissed him with a wave of her hand, "Well with that beer belly and your caveman beard, you look passed 40."

Before Hyde could utter an insult, Jackie found her mouth angrily spewing at Laurie, "Why don't you just go crawl back from the hell fire you erupted from and leave him alone?"

For the first time since Colette was in that house, she sensed something between Jackie and Hyde- as did everyone else. Both Red and Kitty turned to Jackie, absolutely surprised while a stunned Hyde didn't say a word at all. What was worse- Laurie did. She pulled out a toothy, hungry twisted grin and chuckled, "My-my-my…it appears our little cheerleader from _Christmas Once Upon High School's_ over, still harbors feelings for the burnout stoner from way back when, huh?"

Colette turned to Jackie, seeing her face turn from a light shade of pink to flaming red. Jackie hotly denied at Laurie, "I do not! It's just…we're all friends here except for you so-so….YOU GO AWAY!"

Jackie knew how feeble that sounded, and it was probably music to Laurie's ears to hear how weak her voice bounced in her throat in embarrassment, but she didn't care. As long as she kept a straight upper lip, it didn't matter what shade of crimson her face was, she'd blame it on anger not love.

Laurie smartly turned away from her, cackling, "My parents live here. What're you gonna do, Midget?"

And her answer came from a crisp Kitty, "We'll throw you out, that's what. Now, stop being such a loud-mouthed snarky pants before I stop washing yours and Fez's clothes."

Laurie's face fell.

Not the laundry! She hated doing laundry and she always pawned off her mother to clean hers and Fez's clothing.

Red scrunched up his nose, smacking his morning paper against the table, "Dammit, Kitty! Do you mean to tell me my socks have been swimming around in the same water with the foreigner's unmentionables?"

Fez smiled at the bald man, "Just think, Red…your shirt was probably soakin' inside my undies."

Hyde smirked at his old friend, "Fez, you're looking to get your ass kicked, aren't you?"

Red groaned at the mere thought of it, "GAH!" He then turned to Laurie, "You! You learn how to wash your clothes and this idiot's at the apartment washing machines or next time-" He turned to Fez, his brown eyes bubbling in pools of fury as he threatened, "My foot will probably be soaking inside your ass, got it?!"

Fez gulped, nodding, "Yeth. Yes, I do."

Only Laurie seemed indifferent as she sighed, "Whatever."

Hyde couldn't help the small smirk that cracked on his face- Ah, the sweet taste of Justice.

And while Kitty turned around to prepare breakfast plates for Laurie and Fez, she moved out of the way for Fez to see the new occupant.

"Holy crap!" He gasped, "Have we not learned out lesson?"

Jackie and Hyde turned to him, Jackie rolling her eyes, "What's wrong, Fez?"

Fez pointed to a tomboyish Colette, "Her! Fist we tried to replace my beloved Kelso and Edic with that Randy and everything was all sucky and soupy. And when our true heroes came back to us on New Years, did we not vow to never replace them with good looking, pansies again?"

Hyde remembered what Fez was talking about. They all still hung out with Randy, and only took that stupid vow because Fez demanded it once Forman and Kelso came back home. So, the six of them vowed never to replace the others again. And yes, he still occasionally hung out with his _Grooves_ manager, but not as much as he used to. He still liked Randy, but sometimes the guy was a little too feminine and perfect and happy and positive. It was irritating to be around total goodness all day. Every once in a while, a fella needs a total psychotic to snap at him and rile him up. Like Laurie, and come to think of it, even Jackie would fit the bill.

He nodded boringly, "Yes. We did take a vow of stupidity, so what?"

Fez gestured at Colette, "Then why are we in presence of Donna 2?"

Hyde looked over at Colette, raising an eyebrow, "Who? Her? No Fez, she's a puppy. Jackie's little experiment to feel good about herself or something."

"And besides," Jackie cut in, "She's Lil' Jackie, not Donna 2."

"My name is Colette." Colette threw in, but she was drowned out by Fez's remark, "Really?! Because, she reminds me of Donna."

Laurie stared at the girl as if she just realized she was there before saying to everyone in an amused tone, "Let's find out if she really is like that bossy, redheaded giant." She then leaned in at Colette, smiling one of those smiles, "So…gotta boyfriend?"

Everyone paused, including Red and Kitty, to hear Colette's answer. She was technically a stranger to them, even Jackie, and they viewed this as an opportunity to get to know her a little better.

Colette noticed everyone looking at her, waiting for her response. She twisted in her seat before admitting, "No, no I don't."

Laurie cut in with, "Do ya want one?"

"No, I really wanna focus on school-"

"You can't get one, can you?"

Hotly Colette remarked, "I could if I wanted, but I don't so I didn't!"

She didn't know why, but she could feel herself sweating up a storm as Laurie pushed further, "Got any friends?"

"A few."

"Any of 'em boys?"

"Maybe-"

"Find any of them cute?"

For some reason she was feeling anger more than embarrassment and shook her head firmly at Laurie, "No. I don't."

"Live around any of your buddies?"

"No."

"Are you an only child?"

"No."

"Are you close with your dad?"

"No."

"Pants or a skirt?"

Colette looked Laurie in the eye, saying deliberately, "Pants in the relationship, a skirt with a matching top for my wardrobe."

Laurie paused, seeming to like her answer before asking her final question, "Do you want to get married and settled down or would you rather travel the world?"

Colette smirked, wanting so much to outsmart the blond woman in front of her, "Why do I have to limit myself to one or the other? I'll travel the world and pick up my groom while doing it."

Laurie leaned back in her seat, announcing to everyone, "There you have it! Donna or Jackie, you decide. Let's hear the verdict."

Jackie rolled her eyes, "Enough of this crap, Lil Jackie is Lil Jackie and not Donna 2."

Colette sank in her seat, groaning, "What is wrong with everyone? Like, I don't have a voice or anything?! My. Name. Is. Col-ette!"

"Personally, she reminds me of Jackie." Hyde commented. Jackie nodded at him, "Thank You!" Hyde then continued, "Lil Jackie's a bit on the whiny side."

Jackie's face hit the ground, while Colette complained, "Me?! Whiny?! Never in my life has anyone said anything like that to me! Take it back."

Fez looked at Hyde, "Are you sure who are not confusing 'whiny' with 'bossy'? Donna was very bossy. Like…I remember her always bossing Eric around everywhere- and he enjoyed bein' on the short leash."

Jackie turned to a disturbed Mrs. Forman as she gave Laurie and Fez their plates, "Please disregard that last statement."

Red rolled his eyes, asking the ceiling, "Just once I would like a kid free morning. Just once, Lord. Why can't you give me that one last request?"

Fez interrupted him, lost in his own thoughts, "In fact…I bet I can even guess what Eric and Donna are up to now…."

* * *

><p><strong><em>And the beat the goes on... (I've been listening to Sonny &amp; Cher a lot lately. Well, this song in particular.)<em>**

**_Drums keep pounding a rythm...rhythm? rhythm (?) to the beat._**

**_Ladi, da-di, dee._**

**_Ladi, da-di, da._**


	4. Fez

_**Somewhat Strange. You've been warned.** _

* * *

><p><strong>CH.4 Fez <strong>

Fez looked at Hyde, "Are you sure who are not confusing 'whiny' with 'bossy'? Donna was very bossy. Like…I remember her always bossing Eric around everywhere- and he enjoyed bein' on da short leash."

Jackie turned to a disturbed Mrs. Forman as she gave Laurie and Fez their plates, "Please disregard that last statement."

Red rolled his eyes, asking the ceiling, "Just once I would like a kid free morning. Just once, Lord. Why can't you give me that one last request?"

Fez interrupted him, lost in his own thoughts, "In fact…I bet I can even guess what Eric and Donna are up to now…."

**Fez's thoughts:**

Eric, with a thick mustache and wearing tight purple pants and a tight purple shirt that exposed his hairy chest paced around in a dark room. Finally, he stopped pacing the cold tile floor and took a seat in one of the many rows of chairs in front of the black door.

The clock kept ticking, each second pounding into Eric's slippery heart.

Finally, after what felt like a grueling eternity, a man dressed all in white stepped out of the back door, pulling off his surgeons mask.

"Mr. Pinciotti?" He asked after a long, tension filled minute. Eric leapt up from his seat, practically shaking as he asked, "Yes! I mean, Yes! I meant, is she okay?!"

The man in the white suit nodded, "You're partner is fine health. You may see her if you lik-"

The man wasn't even finished when Eric bulldozed his way passed him and straight inside the back nothingness of the door when-

**Fez's thoughts are interrupted.**

Colette interrupted skeptically, "Mr. Pinciotti? Why would he take her name?"

Fez attempted to explain, "Be-cause Eric is the boy and-"

Jackie interrupted him, "One would think that unless you actually met them."

Laurie, eating her mother's cooking, snickered, "Or _saw_ them."

Colette thought out loud, "Were they like, deformed or something because I don't seem to remember them the same way everyone else seems to."

Hyde, with a softened expression, told her, "Look, this is how we used to make fun of them. I mean, I've known Forman and Donna since they were little girls." Laurie patted his back, laughing, "Good one, stoner." Hyde continued, ignoring Kitty and Red's harsh glances, "Forman was a good guy, but he wasn't exactly the most masculine man in the room."

Fez added with a chuckle, "Even if da room was full of girls."

"What do you mean my baby wasn't masculine?" Kitty gasped, "All because he wore shower sandals and loved _ABBA's_ 'Dancing Queen', now everybody's a critic!"

"_ABBA?"_ Repeated Fez, "He loved _ABBA?!_ He never told me! Him, me and Jackie could've shared a record collection!"

"You mean to tell me that boy was still scared of touching the bottom of a bathtub, Kitty?! You told me he grew out of it!" Red barked.

Laurie only laughed, "What a loser." While Kitty's face deepened in worry, quickly realizing she said a bit too much information about Eric to the wrong group of people. All she could do was scoot her chair back, whispering, "Oh dear."

Hyde explained further, "He was so damn sensitive and emotional, though. It was like living with a whiny soap opera."

Laurie agreed, "He was such a girl." She picked up her voice slightly to continue with her impersonation of Eric, "I want everyone to love me because I'm mommy's favorite! I get a free car just because I'm the boy in the family! I have to kiss Donna's ass today because I'm so spineless! Boo-hoo me and my sad life! Let me just run away to Africa because I can!" She then lowered her voice to mutter darkly, "I can't believe he just blows off everybody to go to another country." She then asked out loud, "Seriously? Who does that?!"

Hyde made a face, reminding her, "Didn't _you_ do that? You took off to Canada in the 'Drunken Express'."

Laurie pointed her pinky at him, "Hey, I was finding myself. But Eric?" Laurie slouched in her seat, muttering, "He had everything his stupid, little world would want right here in this puke-hole." She then mumbled under her breath, "What's_ his_ excuse?"

Fez raised a hand, trying to draw back in their attention, "Which brings me back to my story, now, let uth listen to Fez."

**Back in Fez's thoughts:**

Eric ran into a room that looked surprisingly like a hospital quarters. And there, resting on the bed, was Donna. With flaming red hair, and glossy brown eyes-

**Fez's thoughts again being interrupted:**

"Brown eyes?" Jackie spat, "She had blue eyes, Fez!"

Kitty stood behind Laurie, who continued to eat, announced, "Really? I was convinced Donna had green eyes." She turned to her husband, asking seriously, "Don't redheads have green eyes?"

Hyde looked up at her, "No Mrs. Forman, Jackie's right, Donna had blue eyes."

Red eyed him suspiciously, "And how do you know this with so much accuracy?"

Hyde admitted without feeling, "Back in the day I had a thing for her."

Laurie looked at him, "Had a thing? You were in love with her!"

Kitty blinked, absolutely stunned, "Love?! With Donna?!"

"I was a stupid kid then," Hyde explained before gesturing at Jackie, "I even thought I was in love with _he_r."

Red rolled his eyes at Hyde, "You're a stupid kid now."

Fez then eyed Jackie, "And how did you know her eye color, _Ms. Corrector of Fez's story_?"

Jackie turned around, hissing at him, "Because I_ lived_ with her, you idiot! Or did you forget the nine and a half months I was a permanent resident of the Pinciotti's?"

Colette raised her eyebrows at Jackie, "You lived with her?"

Hyde, on the other hand, told Jackie, "Look babe, if you stayed there for only nine and half months, then you weren't a permanent resident."

Jackie narrowed her eyed at him, "Oh, you be quiet you thinker!"

Kitty told a shrugging Red, "I could've sworn she had green eyes…"

Fez shouted, "LISTEN!"

They all stopped talking and turned to him forcefully.

Fez sucked in his breath, continuing, "Anywho, as I wath saying before…"

**Back in Fez's thoughts…**

Eric ran into a room that looked surprisingly like a hospital quarters. And there, resting on the bed, was Donna. With flaming red hair, and glossy blue, possibly green but there also stood a good chance at being brown, eyes.

Eric ran to her side, rubbing his thick mustache against the crook of her neck-

**Another interruption **

Jackie folded her arms across her chest, telling Fez, "Eric? With a mustache? Yeah, like that could happen, and another thing…take him out of that ridiculous purple outfit and his fake furry chest! You act as though we've never met these people!"

Hyde agreed, "Yeah, Fez. What're you tryin' to do? Give us nightmares?"

Fez huffed, "Fine! Have it your way! Now shut it and let me finish!"

**Back in Fez; thoughts:**

Eric kissed the crook of Donna's neck with his soft, shaven chin before pulling away. Only to have Donna stare at him in disbelief, "Why're you naked?"

Eric looked down in horror, "Wha-?"

He was indeed in his birthday suit. He tried to cover himself with a nearby lamp, squealing, "Ohmygod!"

And Donna sat up, whispering harshly, "Shut up! You're gonna wake the-"

**Another interruption:**

"Eeew!" Jackie cried, "A naked Eric?"

Fez crossed his arms smartly, "You said you wanted him out of his purple, kick-ass get up."

Red pointed at the foreigner, "You cloth my son or so help me god, I'll nail you in a crate and personally ship you off to whatever backwards civilization wouldn't have you!"

Fez groaned, "FINE!"

**Back in Fez's thoughts: **

And Donna sat up, whispering harshly, "Shut up! You're gonna wake the-"

It was too late, a loud, piercing cry pierced their ear drums. Eric looked down momentarily, relieved and puzzled as to how he was wearing brown pants and a sweater vest, but he didn't care.

He immediately ran to Donna's side, asking her, "Do you want me to get the baby?"

Donna gave him a sheepish smile, "Yeah, about that…you mean _babies_."

Eric's eyes lit up, "Twins?!"

Another cry was heard…and then another.

Eric turned to the tiny white crib next to Donna with a puzzled expression, "Three cries?"

"Yeah," Donna nodded slowly, "Triplets….lots of pain from my end."

Eric just blinked in shock, "Tri-tri-tri-pletssssssssssssssssssss?"

All three babies continued crying their hearts out as Eric blandly turned to Donna, "So, do you want them so you can mother them and stuff? Since, you're like the girl and everything."

"Me?" Donna scoffed, "No, not me. I delivered them- I'm done."

"Done?" Eric repeated slowly, "But-but Donna, you can't be done! You're the mom, you're the chick! You need to nurse them!"

Donna only smiled at him, "_I'm_ the chick, Mr. _Pinciotti_? No, I don't think so. Maybe you should look again."

Eric blinked, and within a quick instant, he and Donna switched places. He was in the hospital bed of the white room, in a hospital gown while she was in a pant suit by his bed, her hair rolled up into a neat bun with '60s style glasses on the bridge of her nose. She winked at him, "Do me a favor and take care of the kids, babe."

Eric looked around the room wildly before trying to get up, "Me?! Donna, they're hungry! They want their mother!"

Eric got up from the bed and walked over to the crib, taking out a random baby and showing it to her, saying, "See this? It wants momma!"

But then, the baby turned its head at Eric, and with outstretched arms said, "Mom-ma."

Eric stared at the kid in horror as Donna went over to them, nodding, "I know they do, and their mother is right here." She gently pushed the baby into Eric's arms, smiling, "Do me a favor, and when you get home tonight, clean up the kitchen. The house looks a mess." She then turned on her heel and exited the room. Eric was in shock. He then shook his head, snapping back into reality and set the baby down next to his siblings in the crib before trying to run back to Donna, panting, "Wait! Donna!" But, as he was about to go out the door, a nurse came in, trying to push him back into bed.

"What?! No!" He shouted as the nurse wrapped the blankets around him, saying, "Your dominant spouse will be waiting for you at home to make her a sandwich, because we all really know who wears the pants in this relationship."

Eric cried out in pain, "NOOOOOOOO!"

**End of Fez's thoughts: **

"And, I think I will give him boobs." Fez finished, everyone watching him with gaping eyes and open mouthed jaws. Finally Hyde choked out, "Um…that was…extreme."

Colette bit her lower lip, saying, "So…_what?_"

Jackie turned away from Fez, "I have no comment on that scary yet possible outcome."

Laurie only smiled, "I have plenty."

Kitty kept blinking hysterically before she said, "Okay…someone has a very overactive imagination!"

Red only looked at Fez in disgust, "I don't want you to step foot in my house again, got it?"

Fez pouted, stabbing his fork into his eggs, "It was just a story of how Eric and Donna ended up, jeez. Everyone is so uptight."

Hyde stood up, his chair squeaking as he pushed it aside, "As much as I would love to hear Laurie's version of things-"

The blond woman narrowed her eyes at her foster brother, spitting, "I don't have a version, loser. Hell, I don't even care about them."

Hyde rubbed his belly indifferently, "Whatever. All I know is that I have to go into work in a bit." As he made his way to the sliding doors to exit, he turned back to everyone at the table, "I have a long day of telling my only two employees how to run the record store. Then I have an appointment…"

Everyone stared at him, expecting a sarcastic remark which he then granted when he smirked, "To play darts at _Charlie's_."

The second he was gone, Jackie mumbled under her breath, "Darts. So damn typical." She then sat up, pointing at the exit he just took, telling everyone, "This was always his problem! Steven was nothing more than some sort of attractive, underachieving oaf!"

Fez smiled, showing off his teeth, "I know, isn't the man great?"

Jackie then stood up, turning to Colette, "C'mon Lil' Jackie. We'll go shop at the mall to cure us from thinking about Steven."

Colette looked up at her, shrugging, "I was fine."

Jackie tugged at her arm, shaking her head, "No you weren't. Let's go!"

Jackie then pulled Colette outside the sliding doors, with the younger girl groaning, "I was drinking orange juice!"

As soon as they left, Red turned to face Fez who was pleasantly sipping a glass of milk. There was a quiet, tense moment with Red glaring at Fez but the foreigner didn't notice a thing. Both Kitty and Laurie stared at their husbands respectively until Red finally shouted at him, "Get the hell out of my house."

Fez agreed, "Okay, as soon as I finish breakfast."


	5. Kennedy

**CH.5 Kennedy **

Jackie pulled Colette's wrist, pulling her outside the Forman kitchen and onto the driveway. Colette had just enough time to close the sliding door before yanking her wrist out of Jackie's clutches, yelping, "Jackie! Yer hurting me!"

"I don't even have a strong grip, so pipe down." Jackie snapped.

Colette rubbed her wrist, grumbling, "Your nails were digging into my skin." She then looked up at the brunette who just kept pacing the driveway and running a hand through her hair. Colette stepped toward her, "Jackie? Are you nervous?"

Jackie waved a finger at her, faming confidence, "Jackie S. Burkhart is never nervous! Especially over some old flame who clearly hasn't changed a thing since we broke up!"

"Then why is your voice really high?"

She paused, rubbing her shoulders, "Stop analyzing me, Little Jackie. It's getting annoying."

Colette walked over to the parked station wagon in the center of the driveway, leaning on it, "Sorry. It's just that you-" Colette stopped in the middle of her sentence, her eyes glazing over the olive green station wagon. Jackie was too busy facing the Forman kitchen to notice Colette's suspicious eyes on the vehicle. After a moment of empty silence Colette turned away, chuckling a little, "Eric and Donna must be getting to me. I could've sworn this old jalopy dipped for a second. But, maybe it was just my body weight."

Colette stood straight up, facing the vehicle with an amused face, "Maybe ghosts are in our mist, eh?" When she didn't hear a reply, she turned back to the ex-cheerleader, "Jackie?"

Without turning around, the brunette said, "I'm just thinking, Little Jackie." She sighed, "When I was a kid, I was so sure I would be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader."

And then the station wagon definitely sprang by itself, and Colette could feel a chill go down her spine as she was positive it couldn't be blamed on her body weight this time. She stepped back, saying in a shaky voice, "Uh….Jackie? Something weird is going on over here."

The brunette ex-photographer looked up at the sky, not paying attention to what was happening behind her, "It's so strange how fast the time goes by. One moment you're four, the next fourteen, and before you know it you're hitting twenty-four."

The station wagon was silent for a moment, but suddenly Colette found herself growing very suspicious that her and Jackie were not the only two there in the driveway.

With a rush of adrenaline Colette dove toward the vehicle, diving inside the open window in the driver's side. With her legs sticking out, she was forced to pick herself up using her arms. She crammed her neck to see someone, just one person, climb out of the hatch from the back end of the Cruiser.

Jackie kept going on, "If this were the 1800s I'd be considered an old maid."

Colette kicked her way back out the window of the car, plopping on the hard cement on her rear end. But she didn't waste any time grumbling about it but shot up like an arrow just in time to see the lone occupant from the station wagon run into the open garage.

Hearing all the commotion had Jackie squint her eyes, turning around, "Little Jackie? What are you doing? Are you even paying attention?! My story has a moral at the end!"

Colette ran inside the garage after the person. Whoever they were they paused for a minute, the sunlight from the backdoor of the garage leaking out and illuminating the figure but darkening their face in the process. Colette didn't move an inch and tried her best to memorize every detail about this person- this woman.

But as soon as Jackie's clacking heels were heard entering the garage, the woman darted away. Jackie's screeching voice could be heard overhead, "What are you doing?!" The brunette placed her hands on her hips and pointed at the open hatchback of the station wagon, "Playing games, I see?"

Colette ran after woman but was discouraged when she realized the backdoor in the garage led to an empty alleyway. She heard Jackie's irritated voice, "Little Jackie, enough. Mr. and Mrs. Forman don't appreciate people just rummaging through their garage."

Colette jogged back to Jackie, panting, "Someone was here!"

Jackie nodded as she closed the hatchback, "Yeah, you and me."

With adrenaline coursing through her Colette shook her head, holding in a thundering scream, "Jackie! Listen to me! Someone, somebody, a _woman_, was here! She-she was in the station wagon! I think she was hiding! And, she was trying to get away; she _did_ get away!"

By Jackie's face one could easily tell she wasn't buying the story, "You weren't spiking Mrs. Forman's orange juice by any chance?"

"I'm not making this up! You saw it, you had to have!" Colette told her, pointing at the backdoor of the garage, "She was real!"

Jackie waved her hands in the air, "The only thing I saw was you running around the garage like a lunatic."

Colette opened her mouth to say something but Jackie cut in again, "And no, I did not see a mystery woman."

Struggling with the urge to scream, Colette threw up her arms, desperate for Jackie to believe her, "She was _right there_! I saw her! I could've chased her down if your shrill screaming hadn't scared her away!"

Jackie shook her head, motioning for the impulsive teenager to follow her, "I told you we need to go to the mall to get our minds off of Steven."

The twenty-three year old headed for her car, a powder blue Mustang, calling out for Colette, "Let's go." But Colette kept staring at the driveway with a baffled expression on her face. How could Jackie not believe her? She had to have seen her. And the teenager's overactive mind began to wonder if Jackie herself was somehow involved. Colette pointed at Jackie, examining her with distrusting eyes, "How do I know you didn't see her? Maybe you did. Maybe you knew she was there all along!"

Jackie was already irritated by Colette playing detective and placed her hands on her hips, cocking her head to one side angrily, "Uh-huh, you're crazy. I want to go to the mall so we can spend quality sisterhood bonding, not inspect the Forman's driveway for some goon who doesn't exist."

Colette shook her head, not trusting a word that came out of Jackie's mouth, "How can I tell if you're telling the truth? Maybe you're covering for her!"

Jackie was holding back a terrible scream. If this were seven years back and Colette was Michael Kelso, she'd drag her by the ear until it turned purple. If this were six years ago and the sneaker wearing teen was a rebellious, curly haired stoner, she would've kicked his shins and demanded that he listened to her. And if this were five years ago and Fez was the problem in front of her, she'd twist his nipples and tell him that's what he got for opposing her. But none of those boys were in front of her today. Colette was.

Jackie couldn't take it any longer and shouted, "I don't even know how you're illusion looked like!"

Colette said almost immediately, "I think she had blond hair-"

Jackie cut in sharply, "Oh, so you're not even sure, Laura Holt?! Would you like to consult with Remington Steele?"

With much more confidence than before Colette said loudly, "I _**know**_ she had blond hair!"

Jackie rolled her eyes, waving her hand at the girl, "Oh, so now you _know _when before you _thought_."

Colette tried not to let Jackie get to her as she continued, "And she had broad shoulders!"

When Colette said the last sentence Jackie paused for a second, saying out loud and to herself, "Donna?"

As soon as Colette heard Jackie say the name she jumped up, "Ah ha! So you admit it was Donna!"

Jackie shook her head, dismissing everything, "The only thing I admit is that you have lost it. I don't know what you're talking about and _if_ Donna came back to Point Place, the first thing she would do is contact me."

"So she contacted you?"

Jackie turned around, groaning, "Gah! You are worse than Michael and Fez combined!"

Jackie began walking away from her and started toward her car, parked in front of the Forman's house. But Colette refused to be left behind twice and was right on her heels, asking questions that annoyed Jackie to no end.

As soon as the pair made it to the front of the house, they went directly to a baby blue mustang with two white racing stripes sliding along from the trunk to the hood. It was the same one Jackie's father had given her for a birthday gift all those years ago, and it was kept in amazing condition. The tires had shiny new rims, and not one was flat. The paint job was impeccable, not a chip or scratch on it. The interior had newly upholstered white leather in addition to glossy pink dashboard and steering wheel. The glass from the windows had been shined, prepped, and tinted. Everything about it was beautiful, except the yellow ticket on the windshield wiper.

Colette kept rambling on, "I think you knew Donna was coming back! 'Cause as you said, if she were coming back she'd contact you first! Maybe she was supposed to be meeting Eric at that station wagon! I don't know why there instead of another location, but maybe they were meeting there!"

Jackie pulled out the ticket and quickly scanned it.

Colette continued, "Maybe she didn't want us to know about it! I mean, think about it, everybody knows that the Pinciotti house has been empty since the Hollister's moved out over a year ago! Maybe she's secretly living in there like a hermit!"

Jackie finally lost it and snapped, "Will you shut up?! I've got a ticket here!"

"For what?"

Jackie read it, saying lowly, "I don't know…wait. It says I…parked near a hydrant?" She resisted the urge to rip up the ticket and looked around the sidewalk by her car, "What hydrant?!"

Colette pointed at the green one by the rear tire, "That one."

Jackie saw it and angrily professed, "That's a hydrant?! Come on! It's green! Hydrants should be painted red, everyone knows that! I thought it was a small garbage can! They can't give me a ticket for something this stupid!"

"_Yes. We can." _

Jackie spun around to see a dark, middle aged man with a heavy mustache, reflective aviators, and wearing the sharpest police officer's uniform in the county. And even though his silver nametag on the right side of his pressed, blue, buttoned down shirt said his name, Jackie needed no introduction.

"Officer Kennedy." She grumbled, resisting the urge to roll her eyes.

The man smiled cynically, "Well, well, well…if it isn't Miss Jaqueline Beulah Burkhart? You're back in town again, huh?"

Colette was confused, "Beulah? But I thought your middle initial was an 'S'?"

Kennedy laughed much to Jackie's irritation, "Still with that same story, huh?" He then looked passed Jackie to tell Colette, "This one was so ashamed of her middle name she printed up so many shirts announcing false initials that read _JSB_. She tells everyone that _that's_ her name."

He then looked down on Jackie, "When are you going to grow up?"

Jackie did her best to act casually, looking up and smiling likeably, "Still upset that Michael burnt down the Police Academy, huh?"

At the sound of Kelso's name, Kennedy shivered, "Don't you dare bring up that disgrace of the badge!" His eyes suddenly darted around as he mumbled, "He's not back in town, right? I'd have to warn the volunteer fire department to start taking double shifts again."

Jackie's temporary amusement faded when she sighed, "No, he's not here." She then turned her attention to the ticket, "And about this- I should get let off with a warning or something."

Kennedy laughed right in her face, "Warning? You used all your warnings up! You were part of a tiny band of juveniles who tormented the town every chance you could get! You vandalized the water tower, toilet paper tee-peed Mr. Wilkinson (the music teacher's) house and you threw a keg party in an empty pool that belonged to the house your mother was showing for her real-estate office! Do you know how many bribes my office took from your father to keep your tiny butt out of jail! And I don't even want to think of all those misdemeanors we let slide. But now guess what; daddy's out of the picture. And now there is nothing holding back the strong arm of the law from taking you in. And since you're an average, ordinary citizen now-" Officer Kennedy smiled like a fat cat, "-you are treated like an _average, __**ordinary, **__**citizen.**_"

Jackie narrowed her eyes, "You can't prove I did any of those things."

Kennedy asked quickly, leaning forward, "Is that a dare?"

Colette quickly got between the two, using her body as a buffer, "Okay, so how about them Packers? Looks like it's gonna be a winning season!"

Kennedy straightened up, Colette's face familiar to him, "And who are you supposed to be?"

Colette tried unsurely, "Uh…a close family friend?"

Kennedy made a face, as if deciding whether or not Colette was a threat before fixing his badge and belt, "You look like a young lady who has had a few run-ins with the law herself. And I wouldn't be surprised if you were, hanging around with _that_ one." He gestured toward Jackie with his head quickly before saying arrogantly, "But remember Bobby Fuller, ladies. He fought the law, and the law won. And in Point Place, Wisconsin- I am the fearless law."

As he was about to leave, he pointed at the ticket Jackie still held tightly in her hands, "You can show up to court if you want to fight it, but I don't think it'll work since Judge Jenkins is the brother of the same judge who sentenced your daddy to ten years in the pen. You should probably just pay the money." His smile grew smugly, "Think of it as another donation to the force just like daddy would've done for you back in the day."

Colette folded her arms across her chest, muttering, "What a jerk."

Kennedy turned around, catching her slip, "What did you say, young lady?"

Colette coughed, "I said…_whatever_."

Kennedy marched back to the two girls, his full wrath now zeroed in on Colette, "Are you giving me lip?"

Colette held up her hands defensively, squeaking, "I was in the middle of my sentence- I swear!"

Kennedy stopped, demanding her to say the rest of her sentence right then and there so he could hear it better.

Colette turned toward Jackie for help, but the brunette was drawing blanks like her.

Colette stuttered, "Uh, well, I, er, um, ugh…"

Kennedy folded his arms impatiently, "Well…?"

Colette licked her lips nervously, "Whatever, whatever, whatever, whatever-" Her mind was desperate to think of something, and then her mouth did it for her, "Whatever happened to Eric and Donna?"

Both Jackie and Officer Kennedy stared at her in surprise. Kennedy then took in a breath, thinking about what she said, "Eric and Donna who?"

Colette quickly explained in a shaky voice, "Eric Forman and Donna Pinciotti! The two kids who used to live here. Well, Eric did. Donna, she lived next door and stuff."

Kennedy shrugged, taking off his officer's cap, to quickly wipe some sweat off his brow, "Oh, those two kids? I don't know. But I can say they seemed in an awful hurry to grow up. My brother Dan met them, said they wanted to get married but didn't even know why. Now who the hell doesn't know why they would want to get married? And then they lied to him about having sex. Said they never consummated their relationship and were as pure as saints. What a load of crap."

Colette and Jackie exchanged looks.

Kennedy continued, "They were just rushing everything. Accelerating it, if you will. But the problem with taking things fast is that even if you get to the fun parts first, you run the risk of using up all the time you have. And then you have nothing but a broken heart and some memories."

Colette asked slowly, "So you think they're separated?"

Kennedy said gruffly, placing a hand on his hip, "I'll tell you what I think…"

**Officer Kennedy's Thoughts **

It had been very sudden, like a twist a fate. Eric had gone back to Africa to finish up his term and had promptly came home. Or at least that was the plan until the plane he was on was forced to land in New Jersey. There was some engine trouble or something, and he found that he was relieved that the plane didn't explode in midair. However, he didn't want to step foot on another plane to head the rest of the way back home. So, he started taking the Greyhound buses and got as far as Michigan. He was tired of sleeping on buses and waking up to crying babies and with a pounding headache, so he decided to take up a small motel room in a desolate Michigan town and call his mother in the morning.

He had been thankful to sleep on an actual bed for the night. He had a TV and pondered flipping through the channels to see what could be on. But before long his growling stomach had him pull back on his trousers and jacket and fish around the town for a diner that would welcome a lonely traveler on his way home.

He found a small on called "Luke's". What attracted him was the name, as if the universe had been steering him there all along. So he took up a booth right by a window, eagerly flipping through the menu until deciding on a burger. He had been away at Africa for so long, he almost thought he'd forgotten how good a hamburger tastes.

So he sat at that booth, rubbing his greasy fingers from the French fries when someone came in from behind him. He didn't really get a good look on whoever it was, but it was a woman with long blond hair and a black coat that cut off on the back of her knees. She took her place in a neighboring booth a table away from him. The back of her head was to him the entire time, but he just couldn't stop staring at her, wondering if it could be Donna.

Unfortunately she must've felt his eyeballs on her because she turned around.

It wasn't Donna.

He then asked for his check, paying everything in full. He hadn't really been paying attention to the waitress until he looked up at her to hand her a tip. She had the brightest red hair he had ever seen- but it still wasn't Donna.

As he walked back to his motel, he knew it was wrong of him to pine for her so much. After all, they could've married but he left. And she stayed back from school for him, and he still left. All he did was keep leaving and breaking her heart. He hated himself for it and knew it was wrong to keep wanting her, to keep from holding her back.

As he passed the desk of the motel he was staying, he saw the manager arguing with someone. He didn't pay any attention to their screaming though. All he could focus on was Donna, and how he let her go.

He was still lost in his thoughts as he reached his door. He took out the key, fishing for it in his pocket for a while until finding it. And that was when he heard the manager shout, "How many times do I have to tell you! You can't go in there! It's for lodgers only!"

He turned around to see the person the manager was talking to rush to the laundry area before coming back out and making her way to another area.

For a second he thought his eyes were playing tricks on him as he said the only name he could think of, "Donna?"

He wasn't that near her, but she still heard his voice. Immediately her head perked up, her eyes zeroed in on him and she walked toward him in a very fast pace. The manger nearly had a heart attack from all his screaming at her, but she didn't care. She ran right up to Eric and….and slapped him right across the face.

He toppled to the ground, trying to catch his breath.

The manager pointed a finger at Donna, saying to her, "I'm calling the police on you!"

The young woman with flaming red hair narrowed her eyes at the little man, "Fine. Do it. And see if they're here in time to stop your murder." She then focused her attention on Eric, now in the process of standing up, "And You!" She placed her hands on her hips, shrieking, "Everybody was worried sick about you! We were all waiting at the airport until we found out that your flight was forced to land! You should've seen your mother! She was so upset she downed three margaritas before breakfast! And then we were so sure you'd arrive on another flight- but you never did! Your dad is at your house right now trying to figure out where you disappeared off to so he can kick your ass!"

Eric grabbed his jaw, trying to explain, "I was going to call!"

"When?" She demanded, "Because it's been two weeks since you were supposed to be back in Point Place. Right now we are all scouring Wisconsin for your skinny butt. And I should be in school, Eric. Not in the middle of Michigan, getting into a brawl with a pint-sized manager from small-town USA."

Eric didn't know what to say. H let his jaw hang limply for a second before mumbling, "I…I thought about you."

Her eyes softened for a moment but immediately hardened when she noticed a red stain on shirt.

"Is that lipstick?" She demanded.

Eric looked down, confused about what she was talking about before looking back up, desperately explaining, "No! I- it's ketchup! I-I was at a diner earlier to go grab a bite to eat and I accidently spilled some on me!"

She narrowed her suspicious eyes at him, "Are you sure?"

"Yes!" He squeaked.

She then pointed at his motel room with her thumb, "Is this your room?"

Eric nodded, afraid to say anything more. She then sighed, "Okay, grab your stuff. I'm taking you home."

Eric blinked awkwardly, "But-But I wanted to sleep in a bed tonight."

She stared at him for a moment before asking, "When was the last time you did?"

"It's been awhile Donna." He moaned, "I just wanted one night…I'm tired of getting passed out in vehicles. My neck still hurts from last night on the bus."

She seemed to be in the middle of an internal struggle before she agreed, "Fine. You can stay here tonight, but tomorrow morning at six sharp, you're coming with me."

And before his mouth knew what it was doing he blurted, "You wanna stay with me?"

She tried to resist the urge of shoving him back in the room and only commented, "Aren't you a little too old to be afraid of the dark?"

Eric smiled, a hand on his bruised jaw, "You need to make it up to me since you punched me."

"I slapped you."

"That was a slap?"

She rolled her eyes, smiling despite herself. Eric then cleared his voice, "Well, it was a mighty powerful slap."

She then looked back up at him, admitting, "It's a tempting offer Eric,"

Eric looked down, "I sense a _'but'_-"

She continued, "But, we just got out of a really long relationship. It wouldn't be fair to either of us we just hook up- even for tonight. And if we did, where would it stop? Next week? Next year? Could either one of us start a meaningful relationship with someone else if we kept just…_y'know_. Doing _'It'_."

In the background they could hear the manager scream about how the phone was disconnected. Donna looked like she was trying hard not to smile about that which had Eric wondering for a second if she did something to the wires, but then he focused on their conversation again, trying not to sound too bitter, "I guess. It's just, it's hard. I wake up sometimes and I have to remember we're not together."

"You are the one who decided that- not me." She reminded coldly.

They both awkwardly stared at the space around one another until Eric let out a breath, "I ruined it, didn't I?"

Donna shook her head, "You didn't ruin anything, Eric. Our relationship, us, we were spent up anyway. There wasn't much left we could do short of getting married and having kids. And that was where we differed. So, we just kept recycling our feelings because we knew that if we ever talked about it, we would be over. Our common ground would be gone."

"I wouldn't mind getting married and having a few kids. Like, like three or something." He mumbled, hoping she'd share his sentiments. But she smiled sadly at him, "You know that's not what I-" She was about to say "want" but stopped. She took in a long breath, saying instead, "One day I hope you do."

She rented out another motel room, threatening the manager if he refused to rent one out to her. She wasn't that far away from him, but it didn't matter. Because in the morning she was gone. She disappeared, as if she was never there. And Eric almost went crazy tearing the whole town apart to find her.

He never did.

And too this day he's still out there, looking for, refusing to come back home until he found her.

**End of Kennedy's Thoughts**

Officer Kennedy finished, "She left because she knew that if she didn't, he would always be after her and probably never find happiness because they wanted different things out of life. That's why they broke up. She was giving him a shot to find it with someone else. But what happened was the skinny fool was so obsessed with her that he is still out there, trying to find her. And I just threw in the arresting bit 'cause I would love nothing more than to book the six amigos in for _something._"

Colette started thinking about it, "So, like I said earlier: they're separated."

Jackie smiled warmly, "You know what should be separated?" She handed the ticket over to Kennedy, "This ticket. Would you do the honors?"

Kennedy began to laugh, "Good try, but no cigar."

Jackie then looked around the empty street, "How did you even get here? I don't even your cop car here to help tip me off to your presence."

Kennedy grumbled, "First off, it's called a police patrol vehicle. Second of all, because of your little friend Kelso, some trouble-making kid played stowaway in my squad car! Now the kid was taken care of as she should've been. A wild little beast that she turned out to be, kicking and screaming and telling us her 'big sister' was going to go after her." Kennedy lifted up his belt, "We were forced to lock her up! Show her how animals are dealt with! And in the end it didn't matter because we found that the kid came from a broken home, with four brothers. She didn't have a sister." Kennedy continued, "Anyway, a few months later, when the town council was told of the embarrassing goof, they told the Chief they wanted something done about me and Kelso. But what happens? Kelso was let go with a warning because he was a rookie! And me? What did they do to me?! They stripped me of my vehicle and made me into a beat cop."

Jackie couldn't believe it, "You locked up a kid?"

Kennedy shook his head, "Not me. That order came from a higher up."

Jackie spewed in disgust, "You talk about Michael being a disgrace to the badge but you…you let a kid get locked up!"

Officer Kennedy grabbed his gut, "Look, don't pin this on me. I am a God fearing man who believes in the good book-"

Jackie narrowed her eyes, looking at his stomach, "The Good Book or a _Cook _Book?"

Kennedy continued, "The point is- it wasn't my decision! Why would I lock up a kid?"

Jackie yelled at him, "Well, my point is that you let it happen!" She let her hand slap the officer as hard as it could, shouting, "And that's** not** for the ticket!"

Colette jumped back a little, surprised Jackie stood up for her. But she could only say in shock, "You just assaulted a police officer."

Officer Kennedy rubbed his cheek, letting Jackie walk away as she said over her shoulder to him, "I know daddy isn't around to protect me anymore, but I promise that if you lock me up I'll do more than kick and scream."

Both girls got in the Mustang, Jackie itching to speed away. Soon the ignition was on and they were off on their way to the mall. And from far away Kennedy could see the driver's hand stick out of the window and let something fly out into the air. Eventually a wind picked it up and blew it over to the top of Officer Kennedy's polished shoe.

It was a police ticket.

* * *

><p><em><strong>James Avery was a favorite guest star of mine just because of Fresh Prince. And I also liked it when he kept catching the guys breaking into the Police Academy when Kelso thought he was "The Stooge." Best line ever, from Eric, "How do you keep finding us? I'm wearing ALL black!" <strong>_


	6. Macy

_**Long, but hopefully worth it. **_

* * *

><p><strong>CH.6 Macy <strong>

Jackie drove down Franklin, talking on and on until Colette finally interrupted her, "I don't believe you. You slap a cop for me, but you don't believe me when I tell you Donna was at the driveway!"

Jackie rolled her eyes, "For the last time, if you did see someone, it wasn't Donna. Maybe, maybe it was cat."

Colette made a face, "Cat? You think I've mistaken a cat for a full grown person?!"

Jackie stopped at a red light, rubbing her temples, "I don't know what you saw, but I can honestly tell you it couldn't have been Donna."

Colette slumped in her seat, groaning, "How can you be so sure?!"

Jackie told her loudly, "Because she would've called me. We would've made plans."

Colette sat back up, remembering, "Speaking of plans, that cop has got it in for you and the six amigos."

Jackie told her bluntly, "I am one of the six amigos, and don't worry about him. Officer Kennedy tells everyone he's going to throw the book at them but he never does. He threated Michael several times about shoving him off the Police Force, and in the end it was the Chief who dismissed Michael."

"The Chief?" Colette repeated, "Why does that title sound so familiar?"

Jackie explained, "He's a higher up who likes toying with people. I remember daddy always offering him bribes and-"

She remembered with Kennedy had said earlier. A _higher up_ wanted to teach Lil' Jackie a lesson by placing her behind bars.

Jackie finished slowly, "I never cared for him much."

The light switched back to green.

Jackie then continued driving in silence, occasionally taking in glimpses of Colette. The teenager was really quiet, perhaps lost in her own thoughts. Jackie continued down Wilhelm Boulevard, asking Colette curiously, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Colette shrugged, "No." She then turned toward the young woman next to her, "Why?"

Jackie herself shrugged, "I dunno. I guess I'm just trying to get to know you a little better."

"Why?"

Jackie gave another short shrug, "Because I just do."

Colette turned away from Jackie to see the town passing before her out in the window. After light pause, she turned back to Jackie, telling her, "I'm the middle child. I have two older brothers, and two younger brothers. My older brothers are 19 and 22. They still live with my mom, which wouldn't piss me off if they went to school or something. Collin, the 19 year old, he works part time at a Car Wash. And I guess he's okay. And my oldest brother, Clint, sleeps all day long, saying he's writing a novel. He doesn't even have the title worked out. I just wish they wouldn't let their girlfriends stay over with us. All they do is eat our food, talk down to us, and laze around the house. And my little brothers aren't really that much younger than me. Carl is almost fifteen and Colby is thirteen, both are morons. They mean well, but I wouldn't trust them."

Jackie looked over the steering wheel, asking, "So, your dad…"

Colette smiled sadly, "Ah, him. He left us. I guess the stress of five kids drove him up a wall or something."

Jackie had to say something, "But back then, you said the police arrested him."

Colette raised her eyebrow, "They did. Arrested him for getting drunk and disorderly. But he came back after a few months, and _then_ he left."

Colette then turned her body toward Jackie, "But enough about my wonderful life, what about you? Why is your dad in the pen?"

"Embezzlement. Bribery. Black mailing. All those white collar crimes." Jackie then shrugged, pretending it didn't bother her, "Nobody's perfect."

Colette sighed, slumping in her seat, "So why we going to the mall again?"

Jackie informed her, "To treat ourselves to some pedicures, new clothes-"

"With what? I don't have any money."

Jackie smiled, "I'll treat."

Colette reminded her, "You don't have any money."

Jackie pointed at her sharply, "Stop that. Nobody likes the truth."

Colette sat back up, saying, "I'm just glad you're not making me sort your pictures in order of cuteness again."

Jackie snapped her fingers, "That was a privilege."

She then pulled into the parking lot of the mall. As she turned off the ignition, she faced Colette, telling her, "Okay, here's the plan: We go in, look around, act like we have money, and then leave."

"Who _acts_ like they have money?"

"Politicians." Jackie tartly answered, "Now let's go."

::::::

They were sitting at the food court after a mere ten minutes of glancing at the shops. Apparently shopping wasn't much fun if you didn't have any money to buy anything. Both Colette and Jackie sat by a small, red table. Colette bought a gumball in a little machine for 25 cents- but that had long since gone. And then there was Jackie, currently sitting next to her, checking her reflection in her small portable mirror.

Colette blandly said, "Oh, yeah. I'm having loads of fun."

Jackie handed her the mirror, "Here."

Colette looked over the mirror, "What am I gonna do with this? Stare at myself?"

Jackie narrowed her eyes, "No. You are going to hold it while I reapply my make-up."

"Why can't you just do that in a restroom like regular people?"

Jackie jumped back as if that statement was the most horrifying suggestion in the world, "Jackie S. Burkhart is anything but _regular_."

Colette mumbled sarcastically, "Someone's not into themselves…"

"Hold the mirror." Jackie commanded, lifting up an arm. Colette groaned but did as she was told. While Jackie reapplied her make-up in the center of the food court, Colette's brown eyes slowly glazed over to a teen outlet called- _Teen's Cove_. She would never admit it to Jackie or anyone else for that matter, but if she had her own money, she would go over there and buy a cute new blouse or some white jeans. But she didn't work. Her mother specifically told her not to because she didn't want her daughter to get wrapped up in a job and have her grades suffer. All her mother ever talked about was saving enough money to send her to a good college, maybe even U of W.

"You like the clothes over there, huh?"

Colette snapped her eyes back to Jackie, coming out of her thoughts, "Wha-?"

Jackie redid her eyeliner, telling her, "I saw you staring over there. Why don't we go over and check it out. It'll be fun."

Colette immediately shook her head, "I don't think so. I mean, what's the point? I couldn't afford anything over there anyway."

Jackie paused in what she was doing to tell Colette, "Little Jackie, it's like a relationship."

Colette's eyebrows tensed in confusion, "What now?"

Jackie clarified, "Life is like a relationship. Even if you can't afford certain luxuries or you've already been spoken for, there's no harm in looking."

Colette's mouth fell, "Jackie, what you just said describes cheating."

Jackie dismissed what she said with a wave of her hand, "I did not say that. And neither will you. Cheating in unforgiveable." And tonelessly she concluded, "And anyone who does cheat should never be trusted again." And just like that she snapped out of it, placing her make-up back in her bag, saying cheerfully, "C'mon. Let's go check out the skirts and see if the new leotards is in."

Jackie got to her feet, swiping the mirror from Colette before walking over to the teen store outlet. But Colette wasn't as enthusiastic. She chased after the older woman, shaking her head nervously, "Please Jackie, stop! I-I don't want to look at leotards or anything! It's not worth it!"

Jackie spun around, confused, "Why not?" Colette tried to say something, but couldn't find the words to say it. And right then, three preppy girls with long legs, tans, and high pitched voices entered the shop. The three of them mingled with each other, flirted with the cashier and even laughed at the "ugly" people that walked passed them. Jackie didn't mind them at all.

Colette, on the other hand, wanted nothing more than to be invisible.

Jackie had dragged Colette into the small store, laughing the confidant way her mother had taught her, "Oh. Those blouses over there look nice."

The cashier was right by the entrance. He was a boy Colette had known in school. He was dark hair, dark eyes, and a face covered in blemishes. As soon as Jackie and Colette had entered the shop, he smiled at them. The seventeen year old in dirty sneakers and khakis didn't know what to say or do. A boy had never smiled at her before.

Jackie caught the way he gave them a short wave and pulled Colette behind a rack of jackets. Colette rubbed her wrist, mumbling, "How many times are you going to sink your claws into me?"

Jackie didn't pay attention but smiled, "So who's the cashier?"

Colette played stupid, "What Cashier?"

Jackie giggled, patting her arm, "The one who keeps staring at you from afar."

Colette shrugged, "I dunno."

Jackie laughed, "What do you mean 'you don't know'? I saw him staring at us the second we came in."

Colette averted her eyes from Jackie, "Look, he sits in front of me in study hall, but that's it. I don't know him."

Jackie raised her eyebrow, not believing her, "Really? He waved at us."

Colette rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly, "Jackie, please…I don't really want to get involved with anything or one."

Jackie cocked her head to one side, feeling like a teenager all over again, "What's his name?"

Colette shook her head, noticing the three girls trying on heels and laughing with one another. With knots in her stomach Colette shook her head, whispering to Jackie hoarsely, "Trust me- This is a disaster waiting to happen. Please, I don't want anything from here, boys included."

"What's his name?"

Colette rolled her eyes, admitting, "Harold."

Jackie blinked, "Harold?"

Colette explained, "Harold McGee. His mom is a Math teacher for sophomores."

Jackie turned Colette around, patting her shoulders, "Okay, now that's not so bad. He's kind of cute in a way. Now, all you have to do is go over and ask him out."

Colette turned back around to face Jackie, shrieking, "I can't ask him out!"

"Why not?" Jackie challenged, "Don't you find him cute?"

Colette said very speedily, "I find him very cute but that's not the problem. He probably won't even like me. I saw him before we came in here from the glass windows- he was with some other girls."

Jackie tried to calm her fears, "Who? The cheerleaders? No problem. He's not their type. They want football players, basketball players, wrestlers- not skinny, dark haired boys with blemishes, zits and braces. They were just being nice to him to get a discount."

Colette sheepishly looked away from everything, "I'm not like you. I can't just confidently walk over there and sweep some poor, unsuspecting fool off his feet." She then looked up, "I don't want to put myself out there and then get rejected."

Jackie let out a sigh. She then pulled Colette close to her and looked her in the eye, "He likes you. He was eyeing you the whole time we came in here. And all you have to do is believe in yourself and stop doubting everything. Just go over there, ask him how he is, and come back with his number, got it?"

Colette twisted her lips, "You really think he'll like me?"

Jackie assured her, "Of course! You are Little Jackie after all."

Colette took a deep breath, peeking over at Harold from behind the rack of Jackets, "Okay. Okay, I'll do it."

Jackie clasped her hands in giddy excitement as Colette took a hesitant step forward and from behind the rack of jackets. As she approached him, Jackie tried not to pay attention to the cheerleaders who were in the aisle right next to her, whispering excitedly about the upcoming Prom. Instead she focused on Little Jackie, whispering, "Oh, take your hands out of your pockets!"

It was as if Colette heard her even though she was fifteen yards away, and took out her hands from her pant pockets as she unsurely approached the counter.

As soon as she reached the counter, all she wanted to do was turn around and run away. However her lead lined feet weren't letting her do that. The boy looked over at her, smiling with a face full of metal, "Hi."

Colette kept nodding as she gulped, "Hey."

The boy put down the items he was holding and asked Colette, "So, are you gonna buy something?"

Colette looked around the counter quickly, saying with a thick tongue, "Uh, yeah. Yeah, I was just going to get, uh-" She reached over to the first package she saw on one of the display cases by him, not bothering to read what it was and really wishing she thought more about how exactly she was planning on asking this guy out. She threw the box on the counter, clearing her throat, "That. I was going to get that. Because it's special."

The guy looked at the box, surprised, "I bet it is."

Colette didn't like the look on his face and dared to ask, "What'd I get?"

Harold showed her the box.

Colette thought she was going to pass out. She twisted her lips again, saying slowly, "Condoms. Okay, I thought it was anything else."

Harold was about to ring it up, asking, "You don't want 'em?"

Colette shook her head, wanting to bury her head in the sand. She then cleared her voice again, now rocking herself back and forth on her feet, "Do you have gum or something?"

Harold nodded, going to the other side of the counter, "Sure. What flavor?"

"Um," Colette thought, "J-Juicy Fruit."

He turned around and pulled out a pack, telling her, "I like Juicy Fruit."

Too eagerly she agreed, "You do? Me too!"

Harold paused, staring at her strangely before Colette looked away, trying to act casual, "Y'know. It's cool and stuff. Like, brand name and everything. Yeah."

Harold rang it up, "One dollar." He then packaged the gum in a small, brown paper bag.

Colette nodded her head up and down repeatedly, fumbling through her pockets until she produced a crumpled one dollar bill. As she handed it over to Harold, it looked like he cringed, "Um, thank you for shopping at Teens Cove. Please, uh, come again?"

Colette took the small paper bag, shrugging her shoulders, "So, do you have any plans for like, next Saturday or something?"

Harold stared at her for a moment before smiling, "Um, no. Why?"

Colette started to look everywhere but at him as she started out, "Well, I, uh…if you're not doing anything, and I'm not doing anything then I thought-"

Harold raised his hand to stop her, smiling a knowingly, "Don't say another word. I saw you come in earlier and I think I know what you're going to ask." He soon pulled out a pen and paper and continued talking. Unfortunately, Jackie couldn't really hear or tell what was going on over there. Especially with three giggling teenagers by her, all in a deep conversation over someone named David Hasselhoff and how "absolutely hot" he was.

Who the hell was David Hasselhoff?

But in seconds Colette was walking slowly back to Jackie, staring at the paper in her hands. Jackie leaned forward, asking Colette giddily, "So? How'd it go with Harold? You two all set up for a romantic night out in the town for Friday? Or Saturday, I don't know how you kids do things nowadays."

Hollowly Colette held up the paper, "I got his number."

Jackie clapped, jumping up and down, "Good for you! See, I told you if you just had a little faith in yourself and some self-assurance you could win a fella!"

Colette narrowed her eyes before throwing crumpling the paper and throwing it in Jackie's face, "He thought I was asking him out for **you**. He's expecting a call from you pretty soon and he says he wants you to wear something pretty like-" She raised her voice, quoting him, "_Something risqué and what a real woman would wear, kid_."

Jackie stepped back, confused, "What?"

Colette groaned, "Do I have to spell it out for you? He wasn't interested in me. He never was. He was smiling and waving at _**you**_!"

Colette was about to walk away but Jackie pulled her arm, holding her back as she said, "Tell me what happened out there."

Colette rolled her eyes, "Before or after I tried purchasing a box of condoms?"

Jackie was shocked, "Why are you trying to buy that stuff? You're seventeen! Well," She stopped, thinking, "I know I used to do it by seventeen, but you shouldn't! You're just a kid!"

Colette groaned, trying to wiggle her arm away from Jackie. Jackie continued, loud enough for the girls in the other aisle to hear her, "The way to a boy's heart is not through his pants, Little Jackie!"

Colette's eyes widened, "Will you shuddup?!"

On cue the girls came out of the aisle to get a better look at Jackie and Colette. The one in the front with big blue eyes and dark hair stepped forward, smiling at Colette smugly, "Colette Ripley? What are you doing in Teen's Cove?"

Colette stopped. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head as she gulped in horror, "Oh no."

Jackie stood up straight, trying to get things straight, "Oh, wait. You know them? Are they friends or something?"

Colette shook her head, whimpering, "Um, we need to go, Jackie. Like, NOW."

The ringleader grinned, "Something like that. Me and Colette used to be bosom buddies, until…"

Jackie noticed the other two teens giggled while Jackie mumbled, "Until?"

Colette sighed, "Until my dad went to jail."

"And made bail on your family." The blue eyed girl finished, "So, you still around, Cauliflower?"

Jackie shook her head, "Actually, her name is Little Jackie."

Colette raised her hands, "In reality it's Colette, but look Gisele, I don't want a fight."

The girl ignored her and turned toward her pair of minions, "Let's go to another store, girls." She then turned back to Colette, looking her over, "This one has a wanna-be tainting the air."

While the three exited the store, they waved bye to Harold. Colette angrily focused on Jackie, "I told you coming here was a bad idea. The clothes here are for popular kids- and I'm not one. And picking up a boy was stupid! And that run in with Gisele and her minions was simply the cherry on top! I mean," She sarcastically cried out, "What a fan-tas-tic day!"

Jackie started to wring her hands, trying once more to calm down Colette, "Okay, Little Jackie, calm down. You're getting excited!"

Colette stepped back. Her face had this greenish color that indicated she was going to get sick. But she shook her head and asked Jackie lowly, "Just leave me alone. This day with you, today, this was a mistake. I'm sorry I wasted your time."

Colette ran out of the store, Jackie chasing after her. But Jackie did run back and banged on the glass window by Harold, scaring him. She shouted through it, "You missed out on a great girl!"

Harold raised his hands, saying through the glass, confused, "Didn't we set something up for Saturday?"

Colette slowed her pace down to fast jog with Jackie still at her heels, panting, "Little Jackie, look, this is my fault. I should've seen the red flags pop up when you told me his name was Harold. Rule number one from now on- don't date a Harold. Go for a Jake Bradley or Tommy Larkin."

Colette spun around, "I don't know who those people are!"

Jackie tried to explain, "Look, I know things seem bleak thanks to the cast from Ridgemount High, but girls like that don't have a future!"

Colette crossed her arms, unconvinced, "You mean cheerleaders. You mean girls who spread rumors about other girls. You mean girls who are just plain mean. Is that what you mean? Girls that you probably hung around with and more than likely were one yourself?"

Jackie laughed awkwardly, "Me?" She began twirling her hair, "Me like them?"

Colette waved her off, "I can tell by your high pitched voice you were so stop lying." Colette then started scanning the small outlets in the mall, saying to herself, "Forget what my mom says: I need a job. I need something to occupy my time, get my mind off of _school_ stuff."

Jackie told her, "Little Jackie, you have the rest of your life to get a dead-end job. What you need-"

Colette ran toward the first little outlet the caught her eye, saying over her shoulder, "I'm not anything like you Jackie. Okay? Listen, I'm not Little Jackie! I'm Colette and I'm getting a job because I need to support myself."

She ran up to the little place, right up to the woman standing with a tray of cheese sporting a medieval outfit and a bored face. Colette only had one thing to say, "Are you hiring?"

The blond woman said blandly, "Welcome to the Cheese Palace. I am the Cheese Maiden. Would you care for some cheese?"

Colette asked once more, "A-Are you hiring?"

The maiden continued, "We have quite the selection here at the Cheese Palace. They are Colby, Colby- Jack, Cream Cheese, Maytag Blue Cheese, Monterey Jack, Muenster, Pepper Jack, String Cheese, Swiss, as well as many other varieties from Europe."

"Um…", Colette didn't know how to respond, but Jackie did, "Remember what I said about those girls? Well, this is one of them."

The blond woman's eyes lit up with recognizably, "JackIe?" With instant rage she threw the platter of cheeses at Colette and Jackie, screaming, "You bitch! I can't believe you have the nerve to show your face back in this town!"

Colette, on the ground, screeched, "Who the hell is your friend?"

Jackie, scrambling to her feet, yelped, "Little Jackie- Pam Macy. Pam Macy- Little Jackie."

Pam Macy ran toward Jackie, tackling her back to the ground, screaming, "Michael Kelso was mine! I had him! I slept with him! He was mine! And yeah, he was a great screw, so imagine my goddamn surprise when he refuses me! He turns me down cold!" She crawled on top of Jackie, grabbing a chunk of her hair as she hollered, "I don't know why, 'cause I'm pretty good in the sack myself!"

Jackie screamed at Colette, "Don't just stand there! HELP ME!"

Pam Macy then lift up her hand and slapped Jackie across the face, screeching, "But he says he can't because he's a father now. Has some stupid little kid to look out for!" She tried to scratch out Jackie's eyes while Colette wildly searched for the tray, all the while clumsily stepping on cheese samples.

Pam Macy slapped Jackie again, but this time Jackie was able to cling onto her collar, and almost pull her to one side sloppily. This knocked Pam off her balance, falling backward. Colette found the tray which had flew under the counter. She immediately grabbed it, ran back to the spot Jackie was holding back Pam, and hit Pam Macy across the back of her head just as she was screaming, "And then I find out he purposed marriage to YOU! You of ALL people in the univ-"

That when Colette hit her across the back of the head. Pam mumbled something about cheese before falling forward and right on top of Jackie.

Jackie crawled out from under Pam, cramming her head to get a better look at Colette, "I told you not to get a job yet! See what happens?" She pointed at Pam, "Crazy people attack!"

Colette kept turning from Jackie to an unconscious Pam, freaking out, "What the hell was that about?!"

Jackie fixed her clothes, shrugging, "I lose track now days."

Colette almost dropped the tray, in shock, "I-I hit someone over the back of the head."

Jackie, checking herself in the reflection of the counter, told her, "Be careful. Pam's known for getting up faster than she lays down. That's usually how she makes her way over to the next guy."

They heard a groan from Pam, to which Colette raised the tray, ready to hit her again. And then Pam flipped herself over, her body now being supported by her elbows. She let out a sad groan, "I see your picking up strays again. What's a matter? Hyde got away from you?" She then started making her way up, mumbling under her breath, "Aint he the lucky bastard?"

As soon as Pam was to her feet, she tugged at the ends of her Cheese Maiden outfit, glaring at the brunette, "Who's your little friend? Eric's cousin or something?"

Colette waited for Jackie to signal her to put down the tray until she actually did it. Jackie then asked Pam sarcastically, "Cheese Maiden? I see you've finally made it, Pam."

Pam Macy rolled her eyes, saying, "I wouldda if I didn't drop out of school senior year. But, but it was just really hard and none of the teachers would sleep with me for a free A. Which isn't fair- Stacy Wannamaker had the principal wrapped around her short little pinky."

Colette sat down on the floor, trying to catch her breath. She still couldn't believe Jackie was attacked. She had a harder time believing she hit some girl she didn't know over the head with a cheese platter. Jackie noticed Colette staring at the tiles on the floor oddly and deliberately walked in front of her, shielding her from Pam's judging eyes.

Pam didn't notice- as usual.

Jackie then said sternly, "Look, are there any jobs available in this place?"

Pam nodded, picking up the pieces of cheese on the floor, "Yeah, mine in two weeks. I **hate **this shit hole." She then looked up, "Especially the boss. He's some creepy, little blond dude who talks about some brunette cheese maiden who 'got away'. All I can say is props to her. I hope she comes back to show me how she did it so goddamn easily."

Jackie couldn't help it, "Todd's still here?" She then nervously looked around the mall, "Where?"

Pam placed her hands on her hips, "Where's Kelso?"

Jackie snapped, "In Chicago with his daughter and her mother- where he's supposed to be at!"

Macy stopped, then asking, "What about Hyde? Kat Peterson told me was pretty good between the sheets, but then again..." She finished her thought with a giggle, "I never needed her to tell me any different."

Jackie resisted the urge to go across the mall to the gun shop, come back, and shoot Pam. She said instead, "He's in recovery- as in off limits."

Pam made a face, "In recovery of what?"

"Me."

Pam leaned against a wall, shaking her head at Jackie, "And I take it you're not going to let me even ask about Fez since you don't want me sleepin' around with any of your ex's."

"Damn right."

Pam then wickedly smiled, "Then what about Eric Forman? Shelley told me once in the third floor restroom that we was a superb kisser, but she couldn't find out any more the little boy was good at 'cause that giant moose he called a girlfriend walked in, threatening to kick her ass. And I remember Donna. She didn't win JV Wrestling trophies for just standing around and looking pretty."

Jackie huffed, "Don't insult Donna. _I _insult Donna. It's our thing. And she's not a moose, she's a lumberjack."

Pam laughed, "Does it matter? Her and Star Wars nerd aren't around I can tell you why."

Pam paused for dramatic effect before continuing, "There's a rumor floating around town…" Hearing that had Jackie throwing her hands in the air disbelief, "A rumor?! This isn't High School, Pam. I've grown up. I'm a new, evolved woman who does not feed on senseless gossip."

After a silent second passed, Jackie encouraged, "Well go on!"

Colette looked up at Jackie briefly, bit otherwise made no noise or movement.

Pam continued, "Like I was saying, there's this rumor…"

**Pam's Thoughts: **

She had gotten married very early, to her High School sweetheart. And they were happy, or at least they were in the beginning, when she first started out with the scrawny, little neighbor boy. But, in the end it no longer mattered because it was the end.

She had been in the kitchen, boiling some noodles since boiling things was the only thing she could ever successfully do when it came to cooking.

So she wasn't talented. So she wasn't a fancy chef. So, what? Not every woman was, it wasn't a requirement. So what if her and Eric alternated between macaroni, spaghetti, or take out? What if the only 'dessert' she ever made was Jell-O?

She had been staring at the boiling water, trying her best not to feel upset. And she knew it wasn't really Eric if she thought about it. He had been very reassuring and comforting toward her to the point it was suffocating. It was like drowning in a bottomless sea of cotton. He had told her that he didn't care if she couldn't cook, or if she was always running around everywhere at work and was too tired to clean their apartment.

The clear water in the pot bubbled.

But she didn't place the noodles in it, but kept thinking. She barely dressed up anymore. For her job she made sure she sported pant-suits and hair bun, but around the apartment she just wore flannel pajama bottoms and any T-shirt she found in the 'clean clothes' drawer. Sometimes she didn't even wear her shirts, but Eric's.

He didn't mind though. He was always right there, being the loving husband.

It was sickening.

She just wanted an argument or something, some sort of jarring emotion from him other than acceptance. She needed him to challenge her, for him to resist her, for him to oppose her in some way. She couldn't understand why she craved that so much. But, it was one of the things that had initially attracted her to Eric Forman.

He was so radically different than her, so neat and punctual that it got under her skin in a good way. And she didn't want to change that about him, because that's what kept her coming back.

She knew it was messed up. Maybe it was her parents constant fighting that triggered that inside her, the equating of unhappiness to happiness.

But in all honesty she didn't know what it was that made her that way. She didn't know why she needed that rush of angry adrenaline coursing through her veins to make love to him, to just slap him on any surface on the face of the earth and let him fulfill her deepest desires.

But he wasn't like her. He took fights to mean a fracturing in their relationship, so to "smooth" out the wrinkles and creases in it, he stopped standing up to her. He stopped taking the opposite side of her and sided with her on everything she did, every little thing she said, and even her plans. And the moment he started submitting completely she tried her best to rile him up, to get him angry, by saying horrible things to him, by doing degrading things in public, and making up the most outrages ideas for them to do. She thought for sure he would snap out of it and scream at her for being such a terrible person, and then she would pull him to the bedroom and let nature takes its course.

But he didn't object to anything she did.

Not one single thing.

He didn't even raise his eyebrow that funny way used to. He just went along with everything, giving her the impression that he just stopped trying. But in reality, he just wanted to calm everything down, not seeing he was silently hurting her.

And soon she did calm down. Too much. Her once powerful, burning flame was reduced to a small match and eventually his "soothing", "calming" waters extinguished her. She found herself trapped in a marriage that she opposed to from the very beginning and only agreed to because it was to him.

And everything about their relationship bothered her. It was just so boring and dull now. It was like eating dry oatmeal when one was used to a gourmet dinner. And things soon quickly spilled over to their sex life, or rather lack of it. She didn't even want to touch him anymore. And it made her guilty, but also somewhat sad. And if it wasn't his idea, Eric left it alone. And deep down it was killing him that she wasn't available to him anymore. But, they weren't fighting and he took it as a good sign.

The water from the pot was now bubbling, spilling over the edges. The sharp 'ssssss' snapped her back to reality. She quickly lowered the degrees of the flame and dropped in the noodles. While she was busy in the kitchen, the heard the front door unlock.

Her heart sank to her knees when she saw Eric happily step in, saying in an over dramatically cheerful tone, "How's my best gal?!"

She wanted nothing more than to walk right out the place.

Eric then stepped aside, saying once more, "Guess what, Donna!"

She couldn't help but roll her eyes.

He then opened the front door more, letting someone step inside as he announced, "I saw him roaming the complex!"

She looked up, not even having the energy to yell at him to shut up.

And then her eyes lit up for the first time in the longest time.

It was Hyde.

Apparently Eric had brought up their old friend from downstairs. And from the look on Hyde's face, it was apparent he was happy to see her as well.

Donna almost ran up to her old friend, saying happily, "Hyde! Oh man, I-" She looked down at her clothes and then back up to him, "I must look terrible."

But the curly haired man took off his aviators calmly, smiling, "Nah, man. You," He then cleared his voice strangely, "You look real good."

She smiled back at him, "Thanks, and you! Look at you. You look, you look pretty good yourself."

He shrugged, "You still look better."

She shook her head, half giggling, "Not as much as you."

Eric had caught the glimpses the two were sharing, and a part of him immediately wished he had never brought Hyde upstairs. Eric then clasped his hands together, saying a bit darkly, "Don't we all just look dandy?"

Hyde then turned his head to see Eric, almost as if he had completely forgot the other man was even in the same room with he and Donna. Donna then addressed her husband, "Eric, can you give me a second to catch up with Hyde?"

"No." The word was flew out of his mouth. But, after a moment of both Donna and Hyde staring at him oddly, he caved. He nodded, pointing at his and Donna's bedroom, "I'll just, I'll just slip into something."

As soon as he trudged his way out of the room, and closed the door, Hyde immediately asked Donna, "How's it goin'?"

Donna nodded, "Real good."

Hyde told her flatly, "You look like crap."

She closed her eyes, smirking despite herself, "Is it that obvious?"

Hyde leaned against the front door, asking her lowly, "What're you doing here, Donna?"

She smiled wearily, "In the beginning it was good. It was fun. And I didn't mind being his wife, but then…" She just let her sentence die off.

Hyde nodded, understanding, "Quick sparks put out fast." He then rubbed his curls, "Yeah, I remember. I guess it's something like Jackie. They just, y'know, pull you into a world of possibilities and what could be. They talk about marriage and kids and-"

Donna nodded slowly, finishing his thought, "-and how much they love you. And how they can tame you, and how you'll welcome the change in your life." She then looked him in the eye, "They promise domestication will make everything better. And then they have you, trapped in a kitchen, boiling noodles."

Hyde shrugged, "Forman just doesn't get it."

Donna sighed, sitting on a nearby stool, "He never will."

Hyde walked over to where she sat, his hands shoved in his pockets, "Look kid, you're not happy. You're in pain. I can see it. You're dying in this relationship, like how I was with the brat."

Donna looked up, trying her best to smile, "Where did it turn out all wrong, Hyde? We were happy back then."

Hesitantly he reached out to her, placing his hands on her shoulders to steady herself. And it happened. She never thought she would see the day when she'd welcome someone else's touch on her other than her husbands, but she did. And maybe she should've been ashamed of it, but the fact was she wasn't.

And he leaned in toward her, his baby blue eyes melting her heart, "Donna, I've been in love with you for a really long time. And I've been the good guy and stepped aside for Forman-"

She stared at him, feeling young again, "You didn't exactly step aside. You crashed our first date."

He chuckled, leaning in closer, "I know."

"You pulled the fire alarm when I was with Casey."

He nodded, "Forman told you, huh? Don't tell him, but he thinks I did it for him. But I didn't. I could live with you being with Forman, but I just couldn't stand the thought of you being with that slime-ball Casey Kelso. I mean, Forman is a better man than me. But Kelso's brother was just a jackass."

But Donna had only heard one thing. "Better?" She asked sharply, "Eric better?"

Hyde finished, closing the gap between their lips, "He is better, for starters he wouldn't dare kiss a married woman."

And with one fast motion, he was tenderly pressing his-

**Interruption **

"_**Stop It!" **_

Colette jerked her head to see Jackie, practically seething with anger and jealousy. Jackie was losing it and both Colette and Pam could tell. The ex-cheerleader fumed, "Steven would **never** go back to Donna!"

Pam cocked her head back arrogantly, "What? You don't like the way he's _recovering _in my story?"

Colette got to her feet, saying for the first time in a while, "Jackie, let's just leave."

Pam Macy grinned, "Yeah, leave. Mainly 'cause your too scared to face the truth- he's moved on from you. Just like Kelso has moved on from me. Face it _**doll**_, you and me are one in the same. We're just stepping stones."

Jackie shook her head, "We are nothing alike. You whored around with half the town-"

Macy countered, "You slept with half your friends."

Jackie bit her lip, hating that Pam was right. And then Macy gave a small shrug, "I didn't even get to the part where the do_** It**_ in the back seat of his El Camino." Colette had never seen anyone so red faced and glassy eyed as Jackie Burkhart at that very moment. And then Pam topped everything off with, "Just like how we did _It_ in the back of your daddy's Lincoln on Prom Night." Colette walked around Jackie, noticing her teeth and fists clenched tightly. Pam finally finished, looking over her nails lazily, "Yeah, I didn't really need Kat to tell me how great he was between the sheets since I knew myself. A personal experience, _before _you Jackie-cakes."

Jackie then calmly turned toward Colette, saying a too soothing tone, "Little Jackie, you might want to step back." She then turned to look Pam in the eye, "Because I'm going to mop the floor with Pam-cakes over there."

* * *

><p><em><strong>I was listening to SR-71's '1985' on a continuous loop when I wrote this. Could you tell? <strong>_


	7. The Cheese King

**CH.7 The Cheese King **

Pam Macy.

Jackie loathed the day she first had contact with her. It was her first year in public school- the 6th grade. So far she was unimpressed with anyone, especially her then-boyfriend's friends. And other then not wearing a uniform, she thought the whole concept of a public school was stupid. Obviously there had to be a distinction between the children of the elite and the children of whoever else. And as far as she was concerned back then, only the children of the rich, wealthy and beautiful should be given the option of school. The 'whoever' kids should be sent away or put into work since none of them were interested in learning anyway. Take her then-boyfriend. She thought it would be nice sitting with him at lunch, to see how the 'other half' lived and observe their 'public school' intelligence. But he just cracked bad jokes, made arm-pit farts and chewed with his mouth open. Not to mention his elbows were on the table the entire time! And every time she corrected Michael, he would roll his eyes and to the delight of the other members of the group, tell her, "Okay, mom. I get it. I'll be home by five!"

And he wasn't the worst one either. He introduced her to some redheaded delinquent she would later know as Donna Pinciotti. But at the time she didn't care too much about her and did her best to avoid her at all costs. But Michael insisted she meet her, explaining with his logic, "She's a girl and you're a girl! You two have a lot in common like the fact yer both girls! And if those French movies are to be believed, after one slumber party you two will be braiding each other's hair and giggling as you play footsie and other Frenchie stuff!"

She was eleven, had been in private school her whole life up to that point, and was very naïve. She didn't catch what he was suggesting. She assumed he had the best motives and 'footsie' was like soccer or something.

And when they were finally introduced, she threatened to kill him. She still remembered angrily shouting at him the following day, "What the hell is wrong with you, Michael?! How could you think I could be friends with that beast! She throws dodge balls at poor, unsuspecting people for no reason other than her sick enjoyment! And you know what else, Michael?! I asked around, and footsie is not soccer! To think, you almost had that redheaded thing kicking me around all over Wisconsin!" And when he suggested meeting Hyde, she threw several objects at him- including an ottoman. She had seen the scruffy, curly-haired boy and was damned to hell if she would know a poor person like that.

She was so upset with him, she refused to speak to him for 'forever and ever!' But, as it turned out, because she was the new kid she had a harder time adjusting than she originally thought. Everywhere she went on campus, people would refer to her as 'snooty' and 'snobbish' and 'bitchy'. She was so lonely, but refused to seek Michael and his band of arm-pit farting morons for guidance and acceptance. She was too proud for that.

And Pam Macy knew it.

Little did Jackie know, Pam was having a tough time on her own. Apparently the other popular girls like Leslie Canon, Kat Peterson and Stacey Wannamaker were rejecting her, calling her "the stupidest thing since the pet rock" and was rapidly becoming the laughing stock of the whole school. But since Jackie was new, she didn't know it. And Pam thought that the best way to prove she wasn't as dumb as everyone else thought, was by proving someone else was even more dumb. And that person was Jackie Burkhart.

Pam noticed how Jackie always sat by herself at lunch and how others turned away when she tried talking to them. And she did the simplest thing to earn a tiny, black haired girl's trust- she talked with her. Soon they were the best of friends (at least Jackie thought), and Kelso's friends had even more cause to be disgusted with the uptight princess.

But Jackie didn't care, she thought she had a friend. Until the day Pam set her up. It was the middle of November and everyone was getting ready for Thanksgiving. Jackie would never admit it to anyone now, but back then she was actually thankful for having such a good friend as Pam and even went so far as to buy her a gift- hot rollers. It was a Tuesday, a very unusually hot Tuesday when Pam Macy came from Cheerleading Practice. This had impressed Jackie even more, so much so that she was desperate to be a cheerleader herself when she'd be a 7th grader- just like Pam. And Jackie, the obedient friend, ran up to her as usual, begging to know the details of pom-pom waterfalls and the new cheers. And Pam obliged her as much as she could, unwilling to admit to the 6th grader that she was only a towel girl because of her bad balance.

So lying, as usual, Pam told her what the other girls did and Jackie was mesmerized. And Pam would usually wrap up their tiny talks with, "And I guess that's that." But this time she eyed Jackie, asking so innocently, "Say, Jackie-cakes?" And Jackie's ears would perk up at the sound of Pam's 'little sister nickname' for her.

"Let me guess, Pam! You want to practice some cheers over at my place?! Or, or do you want my maids to wash your cheerleading outfit?! Or do you want to sit outside the HUB and make fun of roller skaters again?!"

Pam only smirked, knowing she had Jackie in her sights, "Oh Jackie-cakes, you roller skate."

And Jackie shrugged, eagerly telling Pam, "I know, but I don't mind you making fun of roller skaters. Because we're best friends and I know you don't mean it!"

But Pam only smiled, "Anyway, we're friends, right?"

"Right!"

"And we share and share alike, right?"

"Yup!"

"I need to borrow Five Hundred bucks."

Jackie's face fell slightly, "Five Hundred!? What for?"

"Does it matter?"

"Well, uh, no. No, I guess not, but it's just that daddy has always warned me about lending money to friends and-"

Pam made her feel with guilty with a simple, "Then I guess we're not friends, huh? Since you won't loan me the money, I guess you don't trust me."

"I trust you!" Jackie insisted, "But it's just-"

"Good." Pam cut off, "I need the money by Friday, got it kid?"

Jackie loaned her the money on Wednesday. And though she was still skeptical, she figured if Disney Princesses believed in the power of love, friendship and trust, so should she. And a week went by, and then another, and soon another. Jackie was beginning to get bent out of shape on the count of Pam Macy frequently 'forgetting' to pay her back. And her father wasn't very happy with her, what with her loaning Pam the money from her weekly allowance. And then one day, Jackie insisted that she pay back the money, so Pam agreed.

"Alright! Alright, you can have you're stinkin' money, you baby!"

Jackie was hurt by the statement, but asked, "When are you going to pay me back, tomorrow?"

Pam's lips curved happily, "Today I'll pay you back." She then wrapped her arm around Jackie's shoulders, "Remember the 'Donation Box' in Mrs. Hadley's class?"

Jackie thought she knew the one, "Yes. The big red one for Children with leukemia?"

Pam shook her head, "It's the big red one alright, but it's not for those leukemia kids. It's actually a school bank account."

Jackie thought she was kidding, "No way! School's don't have bank accounts!"

But Pam was ever so persistent, "Maybe Private Schools don't, but public schools do. See, all you have to do is take out five hundred bucks from it, and leave a note inside letting Miss Hadley know you withdrew that amount."

Jackie was unsure about this, but Pam asked her once more, "Don't you trust me, Jackie-cakes?"

And Jackie hesitated for a brief moment before reconfirming her loyalty to Pam, "I trust you, Pam. You're like a big sister who looks out for me, especially when everyone in this crummy school turned their back on me. I know you're telling the truth. I trust you."

And she full-heartedly did.

She figured she never heard of the bank account because the other kids didn't talk to her much. She didn't think she was doing anything wrong and 'withdrew' five hundred dollars from 'the account'. She left a note, telling Miss Hadley what she had done and went home as usual. But the following day, when she walked into her first period, all the kids were staring at her as if she was a rotten rat while Miss Hadley stared at her with piercing blue eyes. She never thought one woman could radiate so much anger.

Without explanation she ordered her to the front of the class. She remembered how the 7th graders, particularly Pam Macy, giggled in delight. Then, Miss Hadley asked if she took five hundred dollars from the big red box.

She admitted that she did.

She was then asked if she left a note, stating that she took the money.

She said she did.

And when Miss Hadley coldly asked her why, she responded honestly, "I was owed the money."

The class busted out laughing, with Sherry Papadakis shouting in hysterics, "The little rich girl was owed money by the leukemia kids?! Whatta snob!" And while everyone in the room agreed, Jackie could feel her stomach flip a few cartwheels.

Jackie shook her head in horror, "It's not a donation box for them! It's a bank account!"

Miss Hadley snapped, marching from the back of the room to the front, only to slap Jackie's trembling hands, barking, "Not for your grubby, little fingers!"

Jackie's lips trembled as her eyes searched for Pam for help, "Tell them, Pam! Tell them!"

Miss Hadley looked over at Pam over her horn-rimmed glasses, "Tell us what, Miss Macy?"

And Pam seized the opportunity to announce, "That she's stupid!"

And all the class whooped and hollered in glee. The only people who seemed to be un-amused were the redheaded 'beast' and her skinny neighbor friend. Jackie thought this was humiliating enough, but Miss Hadley had to take it a step further, announcing that she was a 'little thief' with 'no emotion other than insatiable greed' who 'must be punished severely for her awful, little soul'. And she forced Jackie to bend over the teacher's desk, with the whole class watching as she paddled her. The whole class took immense pleasure in this, and Jackie couldn't bare it any longer as she burst into tears while Miss Hadley paddled her.

But it wasn't the "spanking" that hurt her, though her entire life no one had ever laid a violent finger on her (so she wasn't used to it), but it was Pam. It was the betrayal of a close friendship whose only purpose was to make her out to look like an idiot. Her watery eyes closed, shut tight.

She hated public school.

It was cruel and barbaric. And it was more than her eleven year old self could take.

! #

**12 Years Later:**

Since it opened in 1969 the local mall in Point Place had played the same little song on a continuous loop. It played it once an hour of every day.

It played it in Christmas.

It played it in Halloween.

It even played it two hours before the stores opened and an hour after it closed.

What was this song?

Frank Sinatra's _It Had To Be You_.

So, Jackie and Pam Macy were in a deadlock standoff so intense it mirrored the final gunfight in _The Good, The Bad and The Ugly_. Both girls were staring at one another, intense hatred gleaming in their eyes. The amount of disgust and discord they had for one another was intolerable. Both of their knuckles were itching to plow straight into the other.

It was one of those itches that was everywhere in the body and soul, so it was virtually impossible to scratch. Well, almost. It could be scratched only one way- a fight. A good fight, ending with a well-deserved victory.

Her eyes were on Pam Macy alone, unblinking and silent. Her breaths were unusually calm, as if expecting chaos and craziness all at the same time. And while these two otherwise 'beautiful' girls were in a deadlock, the background music chimed:

_It had to be you, it had to be you  
>I've wandered around, finally found somebody who<br>Could make me be true  
>Could make me be blue<br>And, even be glad just to be sad thinkin' of you…_

Colette slowly walked up behind Jackie, kindly informing her, "You do know the mall has security guards now, right?"

"Good." Jackie mumbled, "She'll need them to stop me from scratching out her eyes."

Pam's eyes darted between Jackie and a broom that was on the other side of the counter.

So did Jackie's, and that's what Pam needed. The split second it took for Jackie to leer over at the broom, Pam Macy had already tackled her, screaming at her, "You always fell for distractions!"

Pam was on top of Jackie, one hand pulling on her dark hair, the other strangling her throat. She then remarked, "Just wasn't fair Jackie-cakes! You got all the breaks! I liked Michael! I thought Hyde was cute despite of all the crap he did to me- but you? You never cared. Why don't you face facts?"

Jackie had been trying to use both hands to pry Pam's off her throat- but it wasn't working. So using the side of her right hand, she karate chopped Pam's throat while the older girl was in mid-sentence, "You'll never have a good rela-kaugh"

Pam's hands immediately flew to her throat while Colette grabbed Pam's shoulders and attempted to pull her off Jackie. Colette tried to reason with Pam, "Look lady, this is stupid-"

Pam narrowed her eyes at Colette, slapping her face and spewing, "**I**! **Am**! **NOT**! _**Stupid**_!" Pam then rose to her feet, slapping Colette's arm, "This has nothing to do with you, this is between me and the mosquito!"

She turned around, screaming at Jackie, "I'm smart! I can prove it! I set you up, didn't I?! I stole Michael away! All those boys in school liked me, right?! So stop calling me if I'm stupid!"

Jackie snapped, rubbing her neck, "If people think you're a ditz, it's your own fault!"

"No, it's not!" Pam croaked, turning away from Colette and Jackie and cradling her head on the counter, "It's not my fault." She then bitterly mumbled, "I don't want to be known as a stupid slut."

For a second, Jackie felt a pang of pity for her former friend and took a step toward her, "Pam-"

And then they heard clapping.

All three girls looked toward the backdoor of the tiny shop. In that direction they heard soft suede shoes stepped toward them. Both Jackie and Pam stopped as they looked up, to feast their eyes on a short, skinny young blond man with a full beard. He wore a red suit along with a red crown, scepter and a thick cape draped around his shoulders.

Pam snapped back to her old self instantly, rolling her eyes, "My boss…"

He spoke happily, as if in a daze, "Jackie! My love! You have returned to be by my side and rule here, at this tiny pavilion in the mall, as my Cheese Queen!"

Jackie almost keeled over with sarcasm, "O-oh, please. How corny is this."

Colette smirked, "You mean, _How 'cheesy' is this_?"

The man ran up to Jackie, taking her hand in his as he practically sang, "How I've missed you!"

Jackie sighed, nodding slowly, "Just as I remember you Todd. A weird beard- check. Doesn't layer the Romeo act too thick- check. And above all else-" She eyed his cape with a certain fear as if she thought it would jump up and bite her, "-dressed to impress."

Todd beamed, "You like the cape? I'm like a superhero now. Your hero if you wish, Jackie. I can take you over my shoulder and fly you across the universe!"

Colette examined the cape up close, announcing, "Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's The Cheese Man! Making life better one cheese stick at a time."

Todd pointed at Colette, "Who's this?" He then asked her, offended by her presence, "I don't remember you."

Colette shrugged, "I'm Little Jack-" She caught herself and quickly corrected, "Colette. I'm Colette." She then pointed at his wardrobe, "Is this the standard uniform for you guys?"

Todd laughed, "Of course not! But, I am, after all, Lord of the Cheese. King of the Colby! Champion of the Cheddar! Master of the Mozzarella! I am the Duke of the Dairy and all that which is Sausage!"

Colette turned to Jackie promptly, "Nevermind. I don't wanna work here."

Pam nodded, "Smart kid." She then told Jackie flatly, "Unlike the individual she was named after."

The brief empathy she felt for Pam was gone in an instant, and Jackie found herself impatiently asking Todd, "Do you still have the carving knife?" She then looked over her shoulder at Pam Macy, "I'm itching to use it right now."

With a twist of his wrist, Todd laughed, "Nonsense! The equipment is for employees only!"

Pam smirked, "Good."

Todd then eyes Jackie lovingly, "Would you care to take a position back at your old haunt, my little cheese cube? I can arrange it very easily…" He then pointed at Pam, "You're fired." He then smiled back at Jackie, "I see a position has recently opened."

Pam made a face, "You just fired me? For nothing! I was supposed to quit! No! Know what?!" She threw her apron on the floor before flipping Todd the finger, snarling, "Screw you, Cheese Puff!_ I_ QUIT!"

Pam then stormed off.

Todd quickly picked up the apron and handed it to Jackie, urging her, "Take it. Take it and fulfill your destiny!"

Jackie stomped her foot, hissing, "Todd, stop groveling!" With her eyes, Jackie's gestured toward Colette, "Especially in front of Little Jackie. She is so young and impressionable. Without me she is a fawn in this cruel world!"

Colette sarcastically agreed, "Yeah, Point Place is a regular asphalt jungle."

Todd's shoulders slumped forward as he pleaded for Jackie, ignoring Colette, "I just don't understand it. You choose men that have nothing to offer you. Like Kelso! What did that screw-head ever have?"

Jackie answered promptly, "He's nice-looking, has a hot body and this child-like manner which I simply adore."

She was right. But he was still eager to prove his point, "And what about that stoner? Hyde? What did he have?"

Jackie smiled, thinking back, "An impressive rap sheet, a bad-boy persona that was so hot, and the deepest blue eyes I've ever had the pleasure to lose myself in. And of course there are other things, but a lady does not talk about that in front of company."

Todd countered, growing desperate, "I head you went out with Fez!"

Jackie nodded, agreeing, "I did. I was looking for love and Fez was right there. If I ever needed a shoulder to cry on, all I had to do was open up my closet door and ask him to hear me out."

Jackie seemed oblivious to Todd and Colette's faces at this sentence as she continued, "But he was a good kiss-ass. I mean, complimented me when I looked my worse. And he always patiently listened to me, never interrupted me. And we could shop together at the mall by day and go to Disco clubs by night. He helped me pick out my wardrobe for the day and we enjoyed the same shows. It was a very comfortable," Jackie thought for a second before shrugging, "It was a comfortable arrangement."

Colette then asked Todd, "So King Cheese, how exactly do you get the wax on the cheese? And does it have to be red? 'Cause personally I think blue wax would also look pretty neat."

Todd pushed past Colette to take Jackie's hands in his, telling her, "Forget about those losers and be with me!"

Jackie cautiously retracted his hand, "Todd- you are wearing a cape."

Colette continued, "Blue wax would bring a whole new meaning to blue cheese."

Todd unhitched his cape and took of his crown, placing everything on the counter. As he folded his cape, he shook his head, "It's just not fair. I work. I pay my rent. I have a fantastic beard. And yet, love alludes me." He emotionally turned to Jackie, "Why?! What's wrong with me?!"

Jackie told him gently, "Don't be sad. It's tough for slightly awkward little men like yourself to find love."

Todd griped, challenging her theory, "Really? Then how is it that an unemployed, skinny, twitchy, Star Wars nerd with the olive green station wagon, who lived at home with his mommy, and who actually owned a set of dolls and had make-up covered zits, got a girlfriend over me?"

Jackie explained, "See, Donna has a thing for the underdog. And it's tough to get any lower than Eric. I mean, the boy thought turtlenecks were cool. Even after I explained that they were out of season, he still insisted on wearing them!"

Todd sat down on the counter, upset. Jackie started to feel a little guilty and went over to him, "Todd, don't feel bad. And you should probably get off the counter. People eat there."

He then reached behind the counter to pull out a guitar.

"Oh." Colette asked Jackie, "Is-is he gonna sing?"

Todd then started to both sing and cry at the same time, strumming the guitar,

"_When I was young, _

_I never needed anyone,"_

Jackie shook her head, "Todd, Todd don't do this."

He painfully continued, _"Making love was just for fun." _

Jackie tried to touch his reassuringly shoulder, but he just whaled out, _"THOSE DAYS ARE GONE!" _

Both girls jumped before Colette turned on Jackie, "Look what you did to him!"

Jackie lost it, angrily telling Colette, "Me?! You're the one that wanted to be a mature adult and get a stupid job here!"

Todd sobbed, _"All by mysellllllff,_

_Don't bwanna'll be all by myself, _

_Any-Any-Anymore…" _

Todd then broke down, sobbing into his thin hands.

Colette pointed at the grown man crying, "Do something!"

Jackie was obviously nervous about the whole thing. What made it worse was when Todd looked up at her, asking, "How could this happen? I bet even that Erin guy is having a better life than me…"

Colette corrected, "Eric." While Jackie shook her head, trying to make him feel better, "No! No I bet Erin's off somewhere, lost in the jungles of Africa, having a worse time than you! Maybe he's being chased by lions, or is some kind of sacrifice to the Gods! See, we don't know!"

Jackie shot Colette a look that screamed, 'help me out here!'

Colette nodded, "Uh, yeah. Africa's scary. Like, it's on the side of the earth, close to, uh, the Bermuda Triangle."

Todd started to wring his collar, sniffling, "He always was so lucky with women."

Jackie made a face, "How was he lucky with women? His entire life and he only spoke frequently to three girls! They were his mother, sister and Donna! And the only reason Donna looked at him twice was because she lived right next door to him!"

Todd's eyes cleared as he explained, "Yeah, but there was a lot of dames that bought his whole 'innocent and gentle' act. Like Chloe, the Slurpee girl!"

Colette repeated, "The Slurpee girl? What a bad nickname."

Jackie then crossed her arms across her chest, "Again with this? Who the hell is Chloe the Slurpee girl? This is the second time I've heard of her and I have no idea who this person is!"

Todd then went on, "And not just her, but Fat Sally once said Eric made a move on her."

Jackie couldn't believe it, "Why would Eric make a move on Fat Sally if he was with Donna?"

Todd explained, "According to her, she was at the library and he was there too. He was checking out a few comics and she was looking at the magazine section for the latest Cosmo. And then, at the same time, they both reached for a Captain America comic. Their hands brushed for a moment!"

Colette sarcastically replied, "Sounds serious."

Todd nodded, "I think it was. And when he and Donna broke up, he went out with Emily Marlow. She said that they went out on a couple of hot and heavy dates."

Jackie rolled her eyes, "Don't tell me- their hands touched in the lunch line!"

Todd waved a finger at them, "I'm telling you! That twitchy, silver tongued Casanova isn't fooling me! With buddies and pals like Michael Kelso and Hyde, it isn't too hard to guess what kind of a person he truly is beneath that next-door neighbor act!"

**Todd's Story: **

Eric was at a teaching workshop, trying to hone in his skills while Donna was at their apartment, cleaning everything up for when her boyfriend's parents would be there later that day. She didn't really care about cleaning things up, and felt that everything looked fine the way it was, but Eric was ever so insistent.

"My mother would never forgive me if she walked in here to an un-vacuumed room!"

To which she stated, "Hey professor, 'un-vacuumed' isn't a word."

But he dismissed her with a wave of his hand and flew over to the kitchen, screeching, "And what is this, hm, Miss Pinciotti?"

She just shrugged, stating the obvious, "Dishes."

Eric rolled his eyes, fixing his tie as he nodded repeatedly, "I know that- but they're not even washed!"

Angrily she sat down by their kitchen table, "And why the hell couldn't you do it yesterday?! You got home around five! I, on the other hand, was busy working up until nine last night and came home around ten. What's your excuse?"

Eric fidgeted slightly, now heading over to the living room to grab his brown jacket, "Well, uh, I-"

Donna got up and followed him, her feet clapping against the tile, "Don't _'well, uh, I'_ me. You just came home and went straight to the fridge and parked yer little ass in front of the TV to watch _Cheers_."

Eric tried to deny it, "No! I was watching re-runs of _Taxi_!"

"You don't even like _Taxi_! You think Judd Hirsh and Tony Danza are show-offs and you're scared of Danny DeVito."

Eric then smirked, "I was watching Marilu Henner."

Donna had to roll her eyes, "Why would you watch her? She has absolutely no valu-"

Eric shrugged, "I have a thing for redheads."

Donna tried to withhold her smirk as she gently pushed his head, "You dink, I better be the only redhead you have a thing for, got it?"

Eric saluted her, standing at attention, "Yes, ma'am!"

He then reached over and kissed her cheek, "I'll stop ogling the small people on TV." And she softened a bit, shrugging, "And I guess I can clean up the house a bit for when yer folks come over."

He quickly kissed her cheek and rushed out the door before she could change her mind, saying, "This is Eric Forman, signing off for just a moment!"

As soon as he was gone, she groaned. She really didn't feel like sprucing up the apartments, but if it was important to Eric, then she figured it should be important to her.

She started with the dishes, listening to her old station: _WFPP The Sound_. She heard the voices of fellow colleagues she admired such as Jerry Thunder, Evelyn Vance the Man Eater, Billy Bob Billings, and Uncle Jack Tuesday. But the program that was on at the current moment was not really one of her favorite segments. It was Mary Broken Hart.

And even though Mary was a really nice, older woman, she had such a jaded outlook on love that it kind of unsettled Donna at times. Take her show for instance, it was all about sobbing people who were calling in saying that their loved ones cheated on them. And at the "conclusion" of each show, Mary would sign off with her main speech, "Love is an idea, not a reality. And when you fall for an idea you lose touch with reality and what is going on around you. Your loved one betrays your trust and you are left, holding the remains of your ego. Face it folks, live in the real world and get your heads out of the clouds." And then she'd sign off with her catchphrase, "This is Mary Broken Hart, and may all the cheaters be damned and the cheated learn from this lesson."

She never liked the end. It always sounded as if Mary condemned Love itself as a fraud. But Donna knew better. She loved Eric and Eric loved her. There was no betrayal of trust or any cheating of any kind. They were together and that was all that mattered.

Over the radio: (A Woman is sobbing): _And then I asked Harry why he had to go to all these business meetings in the middle of the night for no reason and-and-and he said it was none of my business! He y-yelled at me! Told me to go back into the kitchen and wash the dishes!_

Donna dried her hands with a paper towel was fixing to switch the station when the she heard the phone ring. She picked it up, but as soon as she said, "Hello", the phone went dead.

'Odd' Donna thought, slowly placing the phone back on the receiver. She then went over to the small pantry and took out a broom to sweep the floor. By then there was another caller.

_Hello? Is this the Mary Broken Hart show?_

And then there was Mary's clear voice: _**It is, and welcome to the show. So tell us, what would you like to be known as, child?**_

The caller was quiet before replying: _Moron in Madison_

Donna stopped sweeping for a split second, amazed that this particular was calling from her backyard.

Mary kindly told her: _**Now that's a bit harsh, don't you think? After all, you are just another run of the mill girl who was taken advantage of. You are not the moron in that relationship. **_

The caller sighed: _That's where you're wrong Miss Broken Hart. See, I thought I met this great guy. We met in Jr. High. He was sweet and sensitive, and all the things I thought I ever wanted. And our relationship started off slow, with us being friends. But by Junior year it was apparent that it was more than friendship. There was something truly special about us._

Without realizing it, Donna had sat down at her kitchen table, listening to the small radio and uneasily comparing this callers relationship with her own.

_My special guy took me to Prom, to the movies, to these real nice places. He made me feel as if I was the only one that ever mattered to him. And right after High School we got married. We moved into a small apartment and life was bliss. Until….until one day…_

Donna realized she was focused on the program and snapped out of it. She chuckled at herself for being so wrapped up in something that wasn't even close to what her and Eric had. She then quickly walked over to the closet to pull out the vacuum cleaner.

_**What happened? **_

_I got a rude awakening and realized I never knew him at all. And it started off slow. I would find certain things around the apartment that I didn't recognize. _

Donna was about to switch on the vacuum when she noticed something on the beige carpet. It was small and sparkling, something she had never seen before. She squinted her eyes before picking it up.

It was an earring. It was a small silver little thing with tiny gold diamonds. But what made her uneasy was that it wasn't hers. She only owned two sets of earrings, and both were studs.

_Feminine things I knew weren't mine. _

Donna slowly set the earring on the tiny coffee table, telling herself that maybe a guest they had dropped it. The only problem was they had no guests over except Mr. and Mrs. Forman and she was positive Mrs. Forman wouldn't wear something so loud.

_At first I tried to tell myself that my guy wouldn't cheat on me. He wouldn't do anything like that. He was different. _

Donna felt a creeping panic settling inside her, slithering up her spine. Almost instinctively she darted toward her and Eric's tiny bedroom, searching for her little wooden jewelry box that Jackie gave her one Christmas.

She couldn't find it anywhere. Since she didn't wear jewelry too frequently she kept very loose tabs on that box, and at this very moment she was couldn't have been more annoyed with herself.

It wasn't on the nightstand or under the bed or in the dresser-

She flew to the closet, searching for that little box. Maybe she had gotten a pair of earrings like that and just forgot. And maybe the other half of the pair was resting in her jewelry box!

As she was tossing random articles of clothing out of the closet, she stopped when she felt something she didn't recognize.

It was a man's leather jacket.

_He had been dressing differently, acting strangely, but I had chosen not to pay any attention to it. _

Donna dropped the jacket, telling herself it was Kelso's "Fonzie" jacket. But she knew it wasn't. Kelso had ripped it in half by accident when he was fighting over it with Hyde. This one was new, and just Eric's size.

And then she started laughing. This was so ridiculous! Eric wasn't the type to wear leather jackets and paint the town red! She had to hold his hand at supermarkets because he was scared of getting separated from her.

_But I guess the worst part was the phone calls. People would call my place, and when I answered, they would just hang up. _

Donna froze.

She was eerily reminded of the phone call from earlier.

She then ran into the living room area, picking up the phone and calling the school Eric worked for. She needed to know the name of the workshop he was attending and just hear his voice. It would calm her down so much.

But the number she dialed was disconnected. She tried again and again, but according to the machine there was no such number.

She then sat back on their small sofa nervously.

Where did he go?

And then the caller's voice floated into her ears: _But the worst part was the waiting. I would sit on the couch, waiting for him to come home. I didn't know where he was and emotionally speaking, I didn't know where I was either. _

**End of Todd's story. **

Todd nodded, "That's the type of man he is. Run amok, I say!"

Jackie thought out loud, "Eric as James Dean, huh? That's a thought. Not plausible, but a thought. See, he was more a Shirley Temple type."

Colette was silent, mulling over thoughts in her head before asking, "Eric would never, y'know, _cheat_ on her, right?"

Jackie rolled her eyes, "Eric couldn't even cheat on an open book quiz!"

Todd shook his head, his index finger deliberately stroking Jackie's shoulder, "Eric wasn't mature. And like cheese, a man needs time to mature and be ripe for the munching on of a lovely lady. Luckily," Jackie made a face, looking over her shoulder to see his twinkling eyes staring at her, "I'm mature enough now."

Jackie slowly pulled away, starting to get creeped out, "Yeeahhhh…look Todd, it was nice and all, but Little Jackie and I have places to go, people to see and things to do."

She then grabbed Colette's arm, murmuring, "Let's get out of here before he tries to talk me into a sale on Baby Swiss."

Todd snapped back into action, chasing after Jackie. He ran up to her, complaining, "I can't run this place by myself! Jackie, Jackie! Jackie, wait!"

But the girls were already on their way out. Even though they had left the store, Todd couldn't run after them. He knew that he wasn't allowed to leave the premises without an employee present, and at this moment, he was the only employee.

He stayed back, an invisible shield of duties preventing him from stepping one foot into the rest of the mall.

He called out like a wounded animal, "**JACKIE!**"

But it was too late. The girls had already rounded the corner to exit the mall.

Todd sadly let down his arms, sighing, "She was so close…"

He then slugged over to the counter. He grabbed a sign from behind it that read 'Help Wanted' and made his way over to the front of the store. Just as he was putting it up, a bald, tall man came over to him.

Todd blandly remarked, "Welcome to The Cheese Palace. How may I help you?"

The man gestured at the sign, "Hi. I kinda need a job. I got fired from my last one 'cause my dog got ran over by my car. I mean, _a_ car. Not mine. I'm a good dog owner."

Todd just shrugged, too depressed to ask anything other than, "What's your name and then you're hired."

The man let out a big smile, offering his hand for Todd to shake, "I'm Earl Shamus Arthur and on behalf of me and my dog, I thank you for the opportunity to work-"

Todd waved him off, still thinking about his lost opportunity with Jackie, "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

* * *

><p><strong><em>Disclaimer: I do not own That '70s Show <em>**


	8. Randy

**CH8. Randy**

They were pulling out of the parkinglot of the mall.

Jackie kept thinking about Steven…with Donna? Little Jackie had thought she saw Donna earlier, at the Forman's. Could that have really been her? Could she have been searching for Steven Hyde? Could she be ashamed of her feelings and had purposefully avoided the Forman's because she couldn't face them now that she was with Steven? Is that why Donna was in town, and not contacting her? Because she knew Jackie would never forgive her for snaking away Hyde? Could they be together right now?

In each other's arms…

Colette screamed, "Will you slow down?! You're going a hundred miles an hour!"

Jackie came to her senses, slamming the breaks. Soon both girls almost slammed into the dashboard.

Colette screeched, "What's wrong with you?! Are you _trying _to kill us?!"

Jackie let out a breath, "Eric would never cheat on Donna."

"O-kay...Where is this conversation going?"

Jackie intensely turned toward Colette, "But could Donna really cheat on Eric?"

Colette shook her head, "Of course not. You told me-"

Jackie didn't hear her. Lost in her thoughts, she said slowly, "Where did Steven say he was going when we were at the Forman's?"

Colette shrugged, calming her nerves, "Some bar…" She then jumped, "But that was hours ago!"

Jackie nodded, "You're right. He's probably at Grooves!"

Jackie immediately slammed on the gas, steering the car straight to Grooves while Colette shrieked, "Will you slow down?!"

::::::

She needed to tell herself that he wasn't with Donna. She needed to prove it and see him. And if there was one place in this town that he cared about that wasn't the basement- it was Grooves.

Jackie led Colette inside Grooves, showing the place around as if she owned it, "And this, our second stop in my current unemployed journey, is Grooves!"

Colette looked at her awkwardly before nodding, "I know. I come here like, every day after school."

The former cheerleader kept leering about, as if she was expecting a certain stoner. With her over dramatic arm waving, Jackie made herself so obvious. Colette smirked, "Looking for someone?"

Jackie looked around, not really paying any attention to Colette, "Uh…what?"

Colette's smirk grew into a smile, "Sure yer not." Jackie never noticed as Colette's lips twisted, "Um Jackie? Can we talk for a second?"

Jackie was too busy eyeing the store for Hyde to really pay attention to Colette, "Hm?"

Colette let out a heavy breath, "Back at the mall, I may have said some things that I didn't really mean and I was just-" Colette noticed Jackie's eyes were on everything but her.

Colette shrugged, "Never mind."

The older girl didn't even hear her, "Yeah, the mall?"

Before Colette could say anything, out of the corner of her eye, Jackie saw Randy coming out of the back room with a pile of records. Almost immediately she jumped into action, pointing at the red couch in front of Colette, announcing, "This, is the red couch."

Colette sarcastically smirked, "And to think all these years I thought it was the blue couch."

Jackie ignored her comment and went up the register, patting Randy's shoulder as her worked behind the counter, "And this is Randy."

Randy gave a short wave as he rummaged inside the cash register.

Colette nodded, "I know. Again, I come here almost every day after school."

Randy looked up, actually looking at her as a smile broke out from his face, "Colette? Wow, I didn't recognize you without your gang."

Jackie looked over Randy's shoulder, "Have you seen Ste-?" And then she caught on to what he said and whipped her head toward Colette, "Gang? You are involved with a gang?!"

Colette smiled, sarcastically saying, "Yup, I'm the leader of the Pink Wings of Death. Myself and my entourage of harpies fill the streets with Pink justice and fashion sense."

Jackie, sarcastic intention completely skipping over her head, approved, "Good, it's about time someone did something about Point Place's lack of style. Heaven knows I've been trying for years, but everyone seems to get pissed when I try to dress them- as if I'm offending them or something!" She told Randy, "Like Big Rhonda almost flipped over a car way back in Middle School because I tried explaining that tacky, orange leather short-shorts were probably not the best thing to wear at the Christmas Dance."

Randy smiled at Colette, gesturing at Jackie, "How'd you get wrapped up with her?"

Before Colette could respond, Jackie informed him, "She's Lil Jackie. I'm her big sister from the Big Brothers/ Big Sisters thingy."

Randy returned to working, shaking his head with an amused smile, "That's a first." He then looked up at Colette questionably, "Is it true?"

Colette leaned against the counter, smirking, "Yeah…it's a long story, but not as long as the crazy stuff we've been hearing all morning."

Randy finally finished organizing the money and looked up from the register, asking, "Crazy stuff? Like what?"

Colette took in a breath before explaining, "Well, everyone seems to have their own opinions about Eric and Donna's relationship. Like, I really don't care but whenever we're around, people just have to talk about it."

Jackie turned to Randy, asking him, "It's been a long time, huh?"

He nodded, sighing, "Yeah…I still think about her occasionally."

Colette scratched her head, asking, "Think about who?"

Randy forced out a smile, saying softly, "Donna Pinciotti."

Colette was obviously stunned.

Randy explained, "You see, I was in love with her-"

But before he could finish his sentence, Colette who was in a deep state of disbelief turned to Jackie, "Another one?"

Jackie tilted her head to one side, admitting, "Unfortunately."

Randy's cheeks turned a little red as he admitted, "Well, looking back, it probably wasn't love. I was kind of lonely and _hated_. Like, when I first came here, a lot of people didn't like me. For some reason, everyone was convinced I was replacing Kelso and the Forman's son because I showed up around the same time they left. I didn't mean to 'replace' them, I was just on my way to Canada and stopped here for some gas and food, but then I got robbed and needed money and that snowballed into me getting a job here thanks to Leo….pretty wild."

Colette sat down in the stool in front of Randy, telling him in her honest opinion, "Actually that seems very domestic."

Randy questioned her, "So what's your idea of a wild tale?"

Without hesitation Colette answered, "'82, the Ghost Hunt Trails. Me and my friends Cindy, Dylan and Janice-"

Jackie couldn't help but tease, "Dylan yer boyfriend?"

Colette made a face, "Uh-no. Dylan's just a friend. Anyway, the four of us snuck into the main-"

Jackie sighed nostalgically, "I remember my first boyfriend."

Colette rolled her eyes, looking over at Randy, "we snuck into the main cemetery freshman year. We thought we saw some crazy ghosts and stuff. And _that_ is wild."

"That's kid stuff." Jackie scoffed, "What we did, all in that basement, **that** was wild."

"What did you do?"

Jackie smirked, thinking back fondly, "I can't remember, but it was fun."

Randy then suddenly turned to Jackie, asking her in somewhat needy tone, "So, have you heard from Donna?"

Jackie groaned, "Why is it every time I come here or see you, you ask me about Donna? It's never a 'Hi' or a simple 'You look ravishing today!' It's some stupid, random question about Donna. How irrelevant."

Randy looked down, shuffling his feet awkwardly before looking up at her, "So is she good?"

Jackie again groaned, much to Colette's amusement, "Oh come on! Randy, listen up: You are as beautiful as my reflection on a Sunday sunset evening across the waters of Lake Ontario! Your hair is highly maintained and your clothing selection is impeccable- but Donna isn't interested in that. Most girls, normal girls- like me- care about what's on the outside and what a man has to offer financially, she doesn't. She went out and fell for Eric Forman."

Randy stared at her before saying, "No you're not."

"No, I'm not what?" Jackie asked, confused. Did Randy miss her point?

"You said you cared about outward appearance and what men have to offer financially. But, you went out with Hyde…because he made you feel good." Randy explained in a slow voice, "I overheard you telling Fez once that he made you happy and that was why you had to break up with Fez. You felt your emotions were cheating on 'im and that you couldn't do that to him- so you broke it off."

Colette's eyes grew wide, as did Jackie's. There was a brief pause in which no one did anything or said anything. And then, suddenly, Jackie reached over the counter and pinched his arm harshly.

"Ow-Ah!" Randy cried out, leaping back.

Jackie narrowed her eyes at him, "That's what you get for sticking your attractive nose in my business!"

"I don't understand you!" He snapped, rubbing his arm, "It was just something I noticed! Y'know, I thought maybe I could help-"

Jackie told him flatly, "Typical of you- trying to _help_. Maybe that's why you rub so many people here the wrong way! Gah, you're worse than Eric."

Randy turned away from her, mumbling something inaudible.

Jackie glared at him, "What did you say, pretty boy?"

Randy turned around, looking her in the eye, "Look, maybe Hyde would get back together with you if you weren't so…_aggravating_."

Jackie spat at him, "Well maybe Donna would still be with you if you actually had a personality instead of the weirdish, almost inhuman like way you've seem to perfect yourself over the years!"

Randy darkly asked her, "You think I wasn't good enough for her? Well, you know what, I was and still am. The person who wasn't good enough for her was the guy who cheated on her at Thanksgiving with his sister's slutty college friend, the guy who didn't trust her with David Milbank, the guy who told her he loved cake instead of her, the guy who pulled her pants down in front of her friends, the guy who broke up with her over a stupid ring, the guy who didn't take her back when she was at her lowest, the guy who proposed to her before flaking out and leaving her without warning at their wedding rehearsal, the guy who took off to Africa and left her behind after she gave up college for him, and the very same guy who fucked her on New Year's before skipping town! _That's_ the guy who doesn't deserve her!"

"Wait." Colette started, surprised, "Eric did all that?"

Randy nodded, "Yeah, and those were just the highlights. See, that's what I don't understand about girls, they always fall for the wrong guy but they still stick with the dope no matter what." He then told Jackie seriously, "You and the rest of Point Place may view me as a knock-off, but I never did that to her. I really liked her, I still do. And it makes me so mad when you or anyone treats me like if I stole her from some ghost I've never even officially met! And you know what? That New Year's morning, she was so upset because he left her with a little note, apologizing for everything he'd done up to that point. He said he had to go, and that he didn't want to hold her back. He said some other crap about maybe them two finding each other later on in life…and she kissed me good bye, grabbed her luggage and left to Madison without a peep to anyone else."

Jackie never knew that. She knew Donna was leaving that morning; she had to since she purposefully waited for the latest greyhound bus possible so that she could see Eric Forman again. All Jackie really remembered was waking up at 2:00 in the afternoon, Donna long since gone, and her being so depressed she missed both Eric and Donna leaving that she actually ate real ice cream that was chocked with calories. She didn't get to tell either of her friends 'good-bye.'

And then Randy leaned against the counter, silently breathing, "Maybe the reason Eric Forman was afraid to hold her back was because he knew deep down that he was. He delayed her from exploring the world for two years, stringing her along for some marriage that just embarrassed her so much that she lost herself. He may have been great guy, I dunno, I never met him- he avoided me it seems like, but I do know one thing- he hurt Donna more than I ever could so I don't understand how this town seems to take his back and drop mine….and at the same time label her a whore for being with me. That's…that's…" And he did something neither Jackie or Colette had ever seen him do- he cursed. With cold, brown eyes he spat, "That's **screwed up**."

And before Jackie and Colette could respond, Randy leaned back, huffing, "If you wanna know how her life's gonna turn out with that flake- here it is-"

**Randy's Thought's: **

In a small, cramp apartment in the heart of Madison, Wisconsin, a tall blond woman in a waitress outfit came in. She locked the front door, looked around the room and let out a heavy sigh. This wasn't what she wanted when she was a little girl. She expected herself to go to a big university in Madison, not a community college- and she expected to be the center of the school, not some push over with…with a baby to worry about already. She was only 24.

Eric came into the living room/ kitchen area carrying their two year old daughter in his arms, smiling as bright as day, "Hey, honey bun! How was work?"

Donna tried her best to smile as she sat down on their tattered couch, "Same as usual, so how was the job hunting?"

Eric sat next to her, playing with his daughter, "Well, I was going to look today, but then the daycare lady called and said Sadie was sick. So, I went over to pick her up and guess who spent all day with daddy?"

Donna sighed, "You didn't look for work, again? Eric, it's been three months since the Claybourne Academy fired you. You need work, we need the money! I'm tired of taking triple shifts down at the diner! Honey, I need help supporting this family!"

Eric, still playing with Sadie, told the baby, "You don't look sick!"

Donna rolled her eyes, softly taking his chin in her hand and turning his face to her. She whispered, "Eric…I need you to step up."

He stared at her sadly before admitting, "Donna…the economy sucks. No one wants teachers."

She sat up, taking Sadie out of his arms, "Eric, don't give me that. You haven't even been trying!"

"Because!" He stood up, fists trembling, "What if I get fired again?! You were there when Kelso let it out of the bag that I lost my job at the Academy in front of my folks and Laurie! My dad told me how unsurprised he was, my mother showered me with false hopes and my sister left cackling away like Cinderella's evil step-mother!"

Donna stood up, carrying Sadie, "Eric, it doesn't matter! Am I sorry it came out like that, of course I am, but that doesn't excuse you from tapping out on me and Sadie!"

Eric spat coldly, "You've never been humiliated like that."

Donna stepped toward him, "We are married. We are man and wife- for better or worse. When you are humiliated, I am humiliated. When you are down, I am down. When you are stuck in a rut, like now, I am stuck with you! Don't you get it, Eric? It's not just about you or me anymore, it's about us! We have a daughter now!"

Eric's green eyes stayed on Sadie for a while before he looked up at Donna, asking feebly, "Are-are you happy, Donna?"

She was silent for a minute before replying, "Yes, I am."

Eric looked down, "I know when you're lying Donna."

"So then you should know when I'm telling the truth- I love you."

Eric sighed, looking up at her. When she declared her love for him, he knew deep down it was the truth, but he was just too upset to believe it. Instead, he shouted, scaring Sadie, "I KNOW WHEN YOU'RE LYING!"

Sadie clung onto Donna, the little girl screaming right into Donna's ear suddenly as her mother hissed, "Eric, shut up! You're scaring the baby!"

Eric pointed at her, snarling, "You resent me, don't you? This isn't what you wanted when we were kids, laying down on top of grassy hills and figuring out our futures in the stars! You blame me for this, don't you?"

Donna looked down, her child in her arms as she shook her head, "No Eric, I don't blame you."

She should've known better than to settle for a life like this.

"I don't blame you. I blame myself."

**End of Randy's Thoughts: **

He then turned his back, muttering under his breath, "By the way, I think you should go back with Hyde, but hey? Who am I to have input right? It's not like I heard you admit you still had feelings for him or anything…"

"I don't!"

"Good. So then I hope you won't mind when I tell you he's not here."

"I don't mind! In fact, I'm glad!"

"Great!"

As Randy disappeared into the back room, Colette turned to Jackie, "Wow. That was intense. Like, how long was he with Donna? Five years?"

Jackie sighed, massaging her temples, "Try five weeks. That's all Point Place is, Colette…a place in your life when you're at your lowest point."

Colette smirked at her, "That's a pretty cool tag line. You should put that on the 'Welcome to Point Place' sign so visitors will see it when they come in."

Jackie stared at her before cracking a slight smile, "Lil Jackie, do you have any siblings?"

"You already know I have a bunch of brothers, why?"

Jackie shrugged, confessing, "Sometimes I think that if I had a sibling, I would be less lonely."

Colette was quiet before she said, "But you had Eric, Fez, Hyde and Donna, right? And you told me you even lived with Donna, so she was kinda there."

Jackie nodded, eyes on the ground, "Yes she _was_."

And before Colette could ask her what that meant, a stoned hippie grabbed Colette's shoulder, causing her to squeal. Jackie turned around immediately, only to find a friendly hippie smiling at her, waving, "Loud girl! I'm glad to see you back in Place Point!"

Jackie gently smiled, "You mean Point Place?"

Leo, his arms around a stiff Colette, asked, "Isn't that what I said, man?"

Jackie shook her head, relieved she was talking to Leo and not Randy or Steven, "No."

Leo turned to Colette, he was so close that Colette could smell the reefer as it stained his beard and clothes with a permanent aroma, "And what's this?"

Jackie smiled warmly, "Little Jackie."

Leo proudly hugged Jackie, "Congratulations, man! I didn't know you had a daughter!"

Colette looked away, sort of embarrassed at being referenced as Jackie's offspring. Jackie was quick to correct him though, "Actually Leo-"

He then told Colette, "Wow. You're the biggest baby I've ever seen." He then asked Jackie, "You didn't have her this year, right?"

Before Jackie could correct him, the old hippie was hugging Colette, "Oh kids! You grow up so fast!" He then pulled back and told Colette, "You know, I remember when yer mom was knee high!" He then looked over at Jackie, saying slowly, "Now that I think about it, she's still knee high."

Colette giggled at this as Jackie shook her head, smiling despite her best efforts not to, "I've missed you too, you old relic."


	9. Leo

**CH9. Leo **

Before Jackie could correct him, the old hippie was hugging Colette, "Oh kids! You grow up so fast!" He then pulled back and told Colette, "You know, I remember when yer mom was knee high!" He then looked over at Jackie, saying slowly, "Now that I think about it, she's still knee high."

Colette giggled at this as Jackie shook her head, smiling despite her best efforts not to, "I've missed you too, you old relic."

Jackie then introduced them, "Little Jackie, this is Leo, my hippie friend. Leo, this is my protégé, Lil Jackie."

The hippie gave a warm, one armed hug to Colette, "Hey man, it's good to meet you, Junior. And I gotta tell you, I never thought I'd live long enough to see any of the kid's kids."

Colette tried to explain, "Well, I'm not her daughter-"

Jackie interrupted, "But I love her anyways."

Colette tried not to smile. It wasn't working. Leo then looked at Jackie, "So what brings you back here?"

Jackie asked, "Back to town?"

Leo shook his head, "Naw man, in the basement."

Jackie made a face, "Leo, we're at Grooves."

Leo looked around, jolting in surprise, "Whoa man! How's you do that?!"

Jackie folded her arms across her chest, "I never realized how much I missed this place before." She then told Colette, "Little Jackie, when you're older, you'll realize all the great things you had growing up that you never really appreciated. And it's always the little things."

Colette sighed, looking up at the ceiling, "Why doesn't she call me by my name- Colette?"

Jackie gave Colette a look, "Little Jackie, now is not the time to be arguing about details."

Colette's eyes grew, "My name is a detail?"

The ex-cheerleader came over to her and put her arm around her, telling her, "Your name is Little Jackie."

Out of the corner of her eye, Jackie could see Randy slipping to the backroom. With Randy checking inventory in the back, and Little Jackie keeping Leo preoccupied, now was her chance to sneak into Steven's office for evidence that he was **not** with Donna.

"Um, Little Jackie, ask Leo that question you've been bothering everyone with all day with."

"What question?"

"Oh, you know, that one about Eric and Donna."

Colette gave her a suspicious look, "Why?"

Jackie smiled innocently, "Just, you know. Ask him. See his opinion. Keep him busy while I go to the bathroom."

Colette told her, "Grooves doesn't have a bathroom for customers."

Starting to get aggravated, Jackie groaned, "Fine! Then I'll step outside for a smoke-"

Leo laughed, "You could smoke in here, Loud Girl! No one cares. The boss man does it all the time!"

Jackie softly smiled at Leo before telling Little Jackie, "Just keep him busy!"

Colette's eyes flashed as she realized, "You're going to mess around in that Hyde guy's office!"

Jackie tried to laugh it off, "What?! Me? No! Never!"

Colette's told her frankly, "I caught your eyes darting at it."

"Oh, you be quiet and just keep the hippie busy."

Colette turned around, unsurely checking the store to make sure no one was noticing an excited brunette picking the lock to the boss's office door. She then peeked out the window, trying to look inconspicuous while the few customers shopped on. She then walked back over to Leo who had been carefully watching both girls. Colette waved at him, telling Jackie, "Okay, here I go." She then said happily, "So Leo-" But he stopped her, going to Jackie instead. The brunette young woman had been trying to not-obviously stick a hair pin in the lock. She was so concentrated on it that she missed it when Leo came by her side, offering her his key, "It might go easier with this, man."

Jackie stopped, staring at him like her hand was caught in the cookie jar. He smiled at her, offering her his key, "Go on. Try it."

Unsurely, she flashed a smile before hesitantly taking the key. As she opened it, she thanked Leo. As she slipped inside, Colette walked up to Leo, "Why'd you let her in?"

Leo shrugged, smiling warmly, "The lock is there to keep thieves out. And she's no thief, she's on old friend. A loud one, but I remember her."

Colette was somewhat stunned by this, "You do?"

Leo nodded, "Yeah, her names Laurie, right?"

A smile wormed it's way on Colette as she stuck her hands in her pockets, "Well, no, but good try."

"So what did Laurie want you to ask me?"

Colette shook her head, "Noting, it's stupid."

"Naw man, ask me. I'm as open as a book. Unless it's closed."

The teenager sighed, mulling it over in her mind before deciding- _What the hell_? Turning to Leo, she asked him, "Hey, did you know Eric and Donna?"

"Do I!" Leo laughed.

Colette seemed impressed, "You still remember them?!"

Leo shook his head after pausing, explaining to her, "No, I was asking you 'Do I?' as in 'Do I know them?'"

Colette's face fell, "Well, do you at least remember Eric?"

Leo smiled goofily, "Yup! He's that uptight guy who lives in that house with the cool basement."

The teen nodded, "What about his girlfriend?"

Leo seemed shocked, "Girlfriend? You mean that chick that was always with him?"

Colette sat down on the red couch, "Yeah, I guess so."

Leo turned to Colette, exclaiming, "I assumed they were married! I didn't know they were still goin' out!"

"Married?"

Leo then bashfully looked down, giggling, "I think she's pretty."

Colette leaned forward, a little shocked, "You think whose pretty?"

Leo admitted, "The girlfriend…"

At that moment, Randy walked in, carrying a box of records. Colette's eyes flashed toward Hyde's office. He placed them on the counter, showing off his muscles purposefully as he did so. He then sat next to Colette on the couch, smiling that perfectly white smile of his, "Where's your namesake?"

Colette tried not to look in the direction of Hyde's office as she lied, "She stepped out. For air."

Leo chimed in, "She's not Hyde's office, man."

Colette flashed Leo a nasty look while Randy crammed his head to get a better view of the office. Randy squinted his eyes, noting the blinds were conveniently closed.

Colette sensed he was going to investigate and immediately said, "Leo liked Donna!"

Randy explained, his eyes still on the office, "Well, when Eric was in Africa, Leo had a crush on Donna-"

Now Leo was looking at the office, saying slowly, almost to himself, "I remember when I was in an accident and Forman's girl took care of me. She loved me, man." He turned to Colette, "I had to break it off with her."

Randy stood up, still thinking about the possibility of someone in the boss's office, "Donna took care of you? When was this?"

Leo answered him, going on to say as he too stood up, "I remember one time I went over to the Forman's and there she was…in all her beauty. I asked her out, but she turned me down, she said she was seeing somebody. Gosh, I bet she settled down with some lucky fella- and had a couple kids too! She…she probably doesn't remember me. Oh…whatta woman."

This time it was Colette standing up, also thinking about the person in the office who wasn't supposed to be there.

Randy pointed at the office, addressing the elephant in the room, "Jackie's in there, isn't she?"

Colette blurted, "Jackie who?"

Leo smiled, "No, _Laurie _is in there."

"_Kids, I got a call from Micheal and-"_

Everyone turned around to see Mrs. Forman just walking in, a feverish expression on her face as she checked her watch, "-and I need someone to rush over and pick him up!"

Leo stood up, smiling, "She does remember me!"

Kitty gave a stunned look at Leo, nodding, "Of course I remember you Leo. You were at my home yesterday, eating the cookies I made for Red."

"Wait…" Colette processed, "This entire time you were talking about _Mrs. Kitty Forman_?"

Leo asked her, "Well, who else was I gonna talk about?"

Colette and Randy's voice joined in unison, "Eric and Donna!"

Leo dismissed her comment with, "Oh, I dunno who they are." He smiled at Kitty, "But aint she a woman? Took care of me and everything!"

Kitty gave them all queer looks before continuing, "Anyway, Red and I were in the living room, enjoying some television when the phone rang. Apparently Michael and Brooke got into a big fight and Michael needs someone to pick him up at the Greyhound bus stop!"

Colette asked her, "No disrespect intended Mrs. Forman, but how come you can't do it? You're already here."

Kitty sighed, "Red, well, he doesn't like Michael too much since he burned down our original garage in '81. So, naturally, I knew I couldn't be the one to escort him back home! In fact, I picked up the phone in the kitchen while Red watched the _Price is Right_! He has no idea it was Michael who called! I told it him it was my sister and that was enough to keep him from picking up the other phone in the living room! And then I lied to him and told him I was going to step out to pick up some medicine but I've really just been around this darn town looking for someone to go get him! He should be here in 30 minutes! I was hoping Jackie-"

Colette nodded, "I'll go get her-" but she paused when she noticed Randy was still in the room. Colette then asked him, "Um, don't you have something to do?"

Randy smiled, his eyes betraying his eagerness to catch Jackie where she wasn't supposed to be at. Kitty noticed this and cleared her voice, asking Randy, "Did that Perry Como Album I've been asking for come in?"

Without taking his eyes off Colette, Randy's smile eerily grew, his teeth long and white, "I'll go check, Mrs. Forman." As he made his way to the back room, he paused. Turning around, and keeping that plastic smile, Randy told Colette, "You really are Little Jackie, aren't you?" Soon he left to the backroom, with everyone letting out a sigh of relief, except for Leo who smiled warmly, "Well that was weird, dudes!" He high-fived Kitty and Colette, "But I think he fell for it!"

Colette gave Mrs. Forman a weak smile before running over to the Hyde's office. But just as she was about to knock, Jackie stepped out, as radiant as ever.

"Good news?" Colette hoped.

Jackie didn't answer, looking past the teen to Kitty, "Mrs. Forman! What brings you to Grooves?"

**A Few Minutes Before: **

She ran in his office, quickly locking the door behind her. She then closed the blinds Steven would sometimes look out of to see how the store was doing. Next she skipped to his desk, obsessed with finding something to do with him. She was sure he was up to something, her instincts were all on high gear- screaming to her that something was being kept hidden from her. And they were never wrong. When she thought Michael had been cheating on her- she was right. When she suspected Eric and Donna were engaged- she was right. When she knew her parents were only together for money- she told herself she was wrong, but she was right yet again. This was no different.

As she pried drawers from his desk open, rummaging through each one, her thoughts collided with one particular Christmas. It was 1976. Laurie had spiked the punch. Jackie and her fellow cheerleaders drank said punch, believing it was non-alcoholic. And when she was good and drunk, she said and did things she barely remembered. But she did remember the look on Hyde's face, when she blurted, "And Hyde loves Donna!"

Jackie slammed the one drawer particularly hard, cursing. For a moment, she stepped out of herself, wondering what she was doing. Invading a friend's personal space for what? To prove he wasn't with her best friend? A friend she barely spoke to, a friend who left her behind? She sat in his business chair, crossing her legs and crashing her face in her hands, "What am I doing?"

She then looked up, and sitting on her ex's desk was a photograph that nearly made her scream. It was a black and white of Samantha, in her Jeanie outfit, blowing the camera a kiss obviously meant for Hyde. Jackie couldn't help herself as she reached over and slammed it down on the desk, leaving it's back exposed. Angrily she growled, "Stripping whore."

She then leaned back, hurt. He could have a randevu with Pam Macy, and a thing for Donna and a freaking photograph of Samantha but there was virtually nothing that tied him together with her. Not a goddam thing.

She looked up. On the wall, there were two records (both Led Zeppelin), one shirt (of the Rolling Stones), and record sleeve of AC/DC's Back in Black. All were behind glass cases. Jackie had to crack a smile, "You would care more about these things than me, or anyone else." Bitterly she looked around the office, just realizing the only photograph was of "beloved" Sam.

She then remembered something. She opened a drawer in his desk and pulled out an old pair of black aviators. Maybe they were his spare. Maybe he forgot he left them there. Either way, she found them while she was looking for a trace that he was with Donna. Or at the very least, a trace that maybe he had feelings for her.

She placed the aviators on top of the desk, right in front of her. A thin line of dust covered them, something that she didn't even bother wiping away because dust always reminded her of Steven. Licking her dry lips, she sighed, "It's me."

The glasses stayed so still, as if paying her the attention Hyde never had.

"I'm the one."

She gazed into the pools of blackness in the glasses, imagining Steven was listening to her.

"I'm the one you should've picked. And you're the one I should've as well. And I know things have gone too far, and I'm aware that it's too late, but I just, I can't let go." She croaked, a single tear sliding past her eyes, "And I'm trying to be a tough girl, the type you seem to be into, but I just am having such a hard time here, Steven. Everyone's gone!" She couldn't help the feelings that overcame her. She broke down, the tears flooding her face, ruining her makeup, "Fez is busy with Laurie, Michael has his own life in Chicago, Eric could still be in Africa for all I know and Donna isn't here! She told me when my mother left that she would be, and she's not! And I can't do this anymore! Living with the Forman's is fine, but you looking at me, hating me because of one stupid mistake in Chicago!"

The glasses never moved an inch, something eerily similar to how they would've been if they were on Hyde's face.

Jackie sniffed, wiping away her tears, "Okay, I admit it! I was going to sleep with Michael that night! I know it was wrong, and I know it was stupid but I was so-so hurt and so lonely! I thought you turned your back on me, leaving me to fend for myself…I know it's not an excuse. I'm not excusing my behavior, but it was just so much! I took it when Michael cheated, and I swallowed my pride when you did, but you couldn't overlook it when I messed up, huh?" A stab of guilt twisted in her gut, she leaned back in the chair, crying, "I really thought we were gonna make it. If Eric and Donna could make it, two people so obviously opposite of one another, than I knew we had a chance." She wiped her tears away, sniffling, "But who am I kidding? They didn't make it for the same reason me and you couldn't: opposites may attract, but they cancel each other out. Devour the energy of the other until there's nothing left."

The aviators had drops of Jackie's tears on them, each tear sliding off the tinted glass and falling off the rim of its steel frames.

She looked down at her own hands, sighing sarcastically, "Whatever happened to Eric and Donna?" She looked up at the glasses, asking honestly, "Whatever happened to us?"

The glasses said nothing.

She bitterly laughed, "And as usual, you have nothing to say." She grabbed the glasses and shoved them back in their drawer. Angrily she stood up and walked toward the door. She paused, catching sight of herself in the mirror by the door. She looked like she had been crying. Jackie shook her head, "Oh, I can't let Little Jackie see me like this." She quickly reapplied her makeup, wiping away any track of her tears. She then placed her makeup away, feeling someone was on the other end of door. When she opened it, she saw Little Jackie walking up to the door with Leo right behind her.

Jackie flashed her classic "everything's perfect" smile, hiding her pain from her young friend.

"Good news?" Colette hoped.

Jackie didn't answer, looking past the teen to Kitty, "Mrs. Forman! What brings you to Grooves?"

Kitty explained everything all over again, pausing to glance at her watch only to mumble about whether or not Red noticed she was gone.

Jackie coolly responded, "Whatta 'bout Steven? He's not here, so he must be back in the basement. And if he isn't there or here, I'm sure you'd know of another place he'd be."

Kitty threw up her arms, "That's another thing! I have no idea where that boy is at!" She then nervously looked at her watch, "Oh, I have to be getting back otherwise Red will be suspicious!" She gave a short wave at the girls, "I'll be seeing you both for dinner, alright? Just go and pick up Michael."

As she was just about to leave, Leo called out to her, "Dinner? Maybe I can make it, darling!"

Kitty blinked a few times before awkwardly smiling. When she did, Jackie rolled her eyes, "She was talking to us."

Colette told her 'namesake', "You just missed it. Leo was telling me a story about Eric and Donna which turned out to be Mr. and Mrs. Forman." Jackie smirked, looking over at Leo who asked them softly, "So Laurie, you and little Laurie leaving already?"

Jackie sighed, "I'm afraid so, Leo." She then leaned in, giving Leo a hug. She squeezed his shoulders before letting go. Leo gave her a genuine smile, "I've always liked you, Laurie."

The ex-cheerleader chuckled, "Yeah." She then stepped aside, instructing Colette, "Hug Leo, Little Jackie." Colette shrugged, Leo giving her another one arm hug. Both girls said their "goodbyes", exiting with Mrs. Forman.

As the girls left Grooves, Randy came out from the back with some records in his hands, asking the old hippie, "Where's Mrs. Forman? I found that album she wanted."

Leo turned to him shaking his head, and walking over to his usual place behind the counter, "That better be all. She's mine. I think she digs me. It's the beard. Chicks and squirrels love my beard."

Randy assured him, sitting down on the stool, "Still talking about Red Forman's wife, are we?"

After a brief pause, Leo looked up from the register, telling Randy, "I hope she stays with Mr. Forman."

Randy was surprised, "Wait. You actually want your lady love to stay with Red?"

Leo made a face before shaking his head, "My woman? No way, man! I meant the redheaded chick! I hope she stays with the _other_ Mr. Forman."

Randy could only smirk, "We don't know any redheads, Leo."

"Yeah we do."

"We don't."

Leo smiled lazily, "We do, it's just other people know her better than you."

**That last sentence, was a Leo Burn. **


	10. Kelso

**CH.10 Kelso **

"_Borderline, _

_Feels like I'm going to lose my mind, _

_You keep on pushing my love, _

_Over the Borderline," _

For some reason that she never realized before, it occurred to Jackie that the teenager in her passenger's seat was just that- a kid. Her cool eyes slowly looked over to Little Jackie, as she sang passionately to whatever techno-pop whatchamacallit that was currently playing on the radio. Unable to stand another lyric being uttered, Jackie lowered down the volume, announcing, "Okay, new game plan! Try to expand your musical horizons to Diana Ross & The Supremes or even ABBA!"

Colette's jaw almost fell off as she blinked, "What? The Supremes? ABBA? Their songs are old. Besides, I want to listen to _Borderline_."

Jackie rolled her eyes, pressing down on the brake as she pulled up to a red light, "I don't even recognize it. As far as I'm concerned, it's a Pop catastrophe."

Colette turned up the volume, saying proudly, "_Disco_ was a catastrophe; Pop is amazing."

Jackie couldn't believe her ears as she turned down the volume once more, "Disco was beautiful! Now you take back-"

Colette turned up the volume, growing upset, "You call my music names, then I call your music names- that's how it works."

Jackie refused to listen to her, turning off the radio, "Well, whatever this is, I don't like it."

"Madonna."

Jackie's head whizzed around, "What?"

Colette crisply responded, "Madonna. I'm listening to Madonna. Y'know, she has a couple of really good songs out. Like _Holiday_ is my other favorite."

Jackie stared at her as if she was a completely different person, "Excuse me?"

Colette continued as though Jackie had said nothing, "I'm thinking about buying a bluejeaned jacket, fingerless gloves, some leg warmers and probably some really long beads- just like how she has it. Oh-oh, I also want to change my hair like this-" Jackie watched in total horror as Colette lifted up her hair, smiling into the rearview mirror, "I'll have to cut it, and dye it blond like hers, but it'll look so cool."

Jackie couldn't believe her ears, "Blue-jean jackets?! Gloves?! Leg warmers?! Little Jackie, what has gotten into you?!"

"Well it's all the rage! I mean," Colette tried to explain, "it's cool! And I wanna be like her!"

Jackie slammed on the brakes in the middle of the street. Colette almost flew into the dashboard, but Jackie grabbed her shoulder and gave her a half-hearted shake, "You are not Little Madonna or Donna 2! You are Little Jackie!"

Colette groaned, slamming herself back against her seat like a toddler, "Stop calling me that already! I'm not Little Jackie, okay?! I am **not** you. I'm Colette Ripley! And I like Duran Duran, I like Madonna, and I love MTV-"

"That musical television station?"

Colette narrowed her eyes, tiny prickles of dissatisfaction peppering her neck as she calmly explained, "It's called MTV, not the magical, musical TV station."

Jackie noticed the hints of anger in Colette's tone. She pulled back, asking her, "Little Jackie, why're you so upset?"

The corners of the teen's mouth twitched as she gave the former cheerleader the cold shoulder, huffing, "You don't pay any attention, do you?"

"Little Jackie-"

"Call me that one more time, and I'm leaving." Was the girl's cold response.

But Jackie didn't listen, "….Litt-"

"That is **it**!" Colette angrily spat through her gritted teeth. She immediately unbuckled her seatbelt, and hopped out of the powder blue Mustang, slamming the door as she exited. Jackie frantically went after her, "Little Jackie, you come back here right this instant!"

A couple of vehicles approached Jackie's, which was still in the middle of the street. Jackie hollered at them, "Oh, go around!" They did so, one man flipping off the former cheerleader. Jackie shouted at the car as it retreated down the street, "Real mature!"

She then followed Colette down a sidewalk of tiny stores, Colette picking up speed after passing each "open" sign from a different store.

Jackie chased after her, and eventually gained enough speed to catch up to her and grab her arm forcefully. Angry that her vehicle was still parked in the street and that Colette was upset for some "unknown" reason, Jackie shouted at her in front of the customers of the tiny stores.

"What the hell has gotten into you!?"

Colette pulled her arm back, pointing at her, "I thought you were different! I thought you changed! But no, yer still the same propped up princess, so goddamn shallow that I have to arrange your pictures in order of cuteness! You're still the same girl who leaves a child at a jail because you forgot to pick her up! You're still-"

"What has brought all this on?!"

Colette pointed at herself with her thumb, "I'm NOT Little Jackie! I'm Colette! I don't know how many times I have to say it before it registers but it's the truth! And you are so wrapped up in me taking your identity that you had me make an idiot of myself in front of Harold-"

Jackie interrupted, "Well I was good at picking up boys-"

"You are obsessed with me liking things **you** like instead of me liking things **I** like-"

Jackie folded her arms across her chest, "Trust me, ten years from now, no one will know who Madonna is."

"And now you're controlling what I wear?!"

Jackie threw up her arms, "Leg warmers are hideous!"

"It doesn't matter!" Colette screamed, "Because it's me, and it's what I want! So please, stop telling me what to do, what to say, and what to like! And another thing, I don't want your identity! I have one of my own, and yeah it's not the greatest, but it's mine!" Softly Colette shrugged, "Look, maybe you should pick up your friend without me. My house isn't that far off from here- I can walk."

Blinking, Jackie refused to swallow the hard lump that was forming in her throat, "So…that's it?"

Colette took in a deep breath, explaining, "I like you a lot Jackie, but you're trying to turn me into someone I'm not. And overall I've been a good sport about it today, but now it's a little too much, y'know?"

Stepping back, Jackie heard them. The voices of her past, starting with Michael: _"Damn Jackie! You're changing everything about me here! No more dirty magazines?! No more playing with dogs in the park?! No more Prank Day?! It's like I can't breathe!" _

And then Steven, _"Jackie, you want these things from me that I just can't give you. It's too much. You're just gonna have to accept what you see here."_

Even Fez, one lonely, angry night, _"Dammit Woman! I give you gifts! I give you my attention! I give you my fashion tips! I give you the love of Fez and still you find flaws with me! What the hell do you want?! My blood?! Because you are sucking me dry like da daughter of Dracula!" _

The older woman stepped back, swallowing hard, "You're right. I've been trying so hard to make you into my mirror image…I guess I forgot that the world already had one Jackie Burkhart." Colette noticed the glassiness of her older friends of eyes. She asked her, "Are you alright?"

Jackie quickly wiped away a pesky tear that escaped her, "Yup! I'll take you home, Little Jack-, I mean…I'll just take you home."

Together they walked back to the Mustang in silence. There was a ticket on the windshield, but Jackie only crumpled it up and tossed it inside her car. They drove in silence, Colette speaking every once in a while to say, "turn here" or "take a left there."

The more they drove, the more Jackie realized that she was driving straight into Steven's old neighborhood. And when Colette said the sentence, "This is it", Jackie almost hit the floor. It was right next to her old boyfriend's house. Colette unbuckled her seat, and was seconds away from exiting when Jackie blurted, "No."

Colette turned her head, "What?"

Jackie continued to go on all at once, "You can't go back there. It's filthy, it's dirty, it's full of dead dreams and rat poop. You can't go back there, Steven- I won't let you."

Colette's eyes shifted, "I'm 'Steven' now?"

Taking in a deep breath, Jackie looked passed Colette and straight at the house, "Give me another chance. I need to give you some sense of worth that way you push forward and get out of this place."

"It's my home."

Jackie looked Colette in the eye fiercely, "But you're better than this! I see it! And I know Little, uh, well…I know I'm not the best role model, but I guess I wish I had a second chance that way I wouldn't have screwed up my life the way I did. But, I can't go back; not with a time machine, and not by using you. But I can help you from making the same mistakes, or just plain bad ones."

Colette gave Jackie a look, "I don't understand-"

"What are you going to do with your life?" Jackie demanded.

"I dunno," Colette shrugged, "Maybe get a job-"

"No, you are going to college." Jackie corrected, saying, "It's something I wish I took more seriously, and it's something you must consider."

Colette laughed bitterly, "College? Me? Are you kidding? I'm not worth all that trouble-" She then pointed at the direction of the school, "Hell I can't even get a 100 on a report! The best I get is a stupid 99-"

"Yes, you are worth the trouble."

"No, I'm not." Colette muttered, turning away from the other woman in the vehicle. Colette then climbed out of the Mustang, gently pushing the door shut. Jackie thought about going after her, but when the screen door opened and she saw what she assumed was one of Colette's brothers opening the door for her, she didn't.

She then waited a few extra minutes, waiting for an eleven year old Colette to come busting through the screen door and running toward the car, just like when she first met Colette at the Big Brothers/ Big Sisters Building. But it didn't happen.

Jackie checked her watch. It was going to be one o'clock. She banged the steering wheel, trying not to scream. She honestly thought she was so close to reaching Colette! She could've helped her…

With burning eyes, the ex-cheerleader immediately backed out of the dirt driveway.

:::::::

She pulled up in front of the Greyhound bus station. When she couldn't see a trace of her ex, she moved into the parking lot. Frustrated, she didn't even check her surroundings as she piled out of her car and slammed the door shut. She entered the station, pushing out all her memories of Little Jackie. If Little Jackie didn't want her help, than fine. She wasn't going to waste any more time thinking about it than she had to.

"Jackie!"

She stopped, suddenly aware she was walking around in the station without any apparent destination. And who was calling her name?

"Jackie, over here! By the vending machine!"

She turned around, seeing her first love, with his arm stuck in the flap of the vending machine. Before she could help herself, Jackie slipped out a high pitched, "Michael!" She marched right up to him, her nerves tightening, "What the hell are you doing?!"

Kelso looked up at her, trying to explain, "Well, you were taking so long that I got hungry! So, I bought this Snickers, but it got stuck. So, I thought I'd get it unstuck with my hand…but I'm now I'm stuck."

Jackie shook her head at him, "I cannot believe you are some little girl's role model." As soon as she said it, she thought of Little Jackie. She murmured to herself, "I can't believe I was one, and I blew it."

Kelso crammed his head to get a better look at her, "What? What're you sayin'?"

"Nothing." Jackie grumbled, squatting down to get a better look at his arm. It was lodged inside the vending machine all the way up to his shoulder. She rolled her eyes, "All this for a Snickers?"

Kelso explained, "When you're hungry, you'll do anything."

Jackie thought back to that one time Donna tried a yogurt only diet with her. Jackie warned her it was going to be tough, but "high-and-mighty" Donna replied, "If you can do it, how tough can it be?"

The lumberjack only lasted two days before she got real plastered on Tequila and hijacked a Dunkin' Donuts just outside town. Afterwards, Donna claimed to have blacked out during the whole ordeal. Jackie herself found it so amusing that she paid back the Donut shop just to say she did it and hold it over Donna's head. And the rest of the gang didn't let Miss "high-and-nighty" live it down for weeks. Jackie breezed through her days while Donna grumbled that her life couldn't get worse- and then Eric pulled her pants down on Valentine's Day in front of the guys. She went from "Drunk n' Go-Nuts Donna" to "Granny Panties" overnight. Jackie supposed life could get worse.

Kelso noticed his ex-girlfriend was smiling and couldn't help but laugh, "Are you thinking about Drunk n' Go-Nuts Donna, too?!"

Jackie tried to wipe away her smile, shushing him, "Michael, we need to focus on the topic at hand, er, _arm_."

Kelso muscled his shoulder awkwardly, telling her confidently, "I've been in worse scrapes than this! I just need a sec…I need…hold up." He worked his arm around, swiveling it counterclockwise until his hand grabbed a Snickers. He then smiled, "Got it!"

"Michael!" Jackie scolded, "I thought you were working on getting your arm _out_-"

Kelso soon popped out his arm from the vending machine, grinning, "Yeah, and step one was: Retrieve Snickers." He proudly waved the chocolate bar in front of her face, "Score!" She resisted the urge to roll her eyes as he immediately unwrapped it and took a big bite out of it. With a mouthful of chocolate, he grabbed his bags and shrugged, "We goin' now or what?"

As they walked through the cars in the parking lot, Jackie had to ask him, "What's this I hear about you and Brooke? Trouble in Paradise?"

They reached her car, Jackie unlocking it as Kelso piled his luggage in the backseat. He couldn't help but groan, "Paradise? Never even saw it. Instead I'm being talked down to!"

Both slid into their respective seats, with Jackie in the driver's seat and him riding shotgun. She then turned her head while she buckled up, "Talked down to?"

Kelso nodded, slamming his door shut, "Yeah! It's sorta like what you used to do with me, remember? All the _do this_, and _don't do_ _that_ stuff; but last night Brooke went too far!"

"Mm?"

Kelso sat silently next to Jackie, the vehicle unmoving until he sighed, "I lost Betsy at the Night Club."

Jackie's eyes popped out, "You did what?!"

Kelso groaned, "I know it looks bad; but Betsy's school had this whole 'Career Day' thing, y'know? Sorta like what we had back in the day! So, I talked to Vince, and convinced him that a 'Take your daughter to work day' would be great-"

"Michael," Jackie interrupted, "You work at a strip club! How was this a good idea?"

Kelso nodded, acknowledging, "Okay, so my plan had a few kinks-"

"A _few_?!"

Kelso glared at her, "Great! Now you sound like Brooke!"

Jackie tried to calm down, "Okay, okay- finish your story."

"Alright, so anyway, I took Betsy with me to work. But, I'm not a complete hopeless mess! I made sure she stayed outside with me, working a bouncer detail."

Jackie's head tilted, her eyes squinting as she thought out loud, "Weren't you promoted to 'Don't Touch That' guy?"

Kelso sighed, "Yeah, but I goofed."

Jackie stared him down judgingly, "You touched a stripper, didn't you? You cheated on Brooke, the mother of your child-"

"No!" Kelso shouted defensively, "Nu-uh! I touched a hoagie! And it was Vince's. And I may have eaten said hoagie before I knew it was Vince's; hence explaining my current demotion."

Jackie smacked Kelso's shoulder, "Seriously?"

Kelso yelped, "Hey! It's not my fault! I can't control myself! Besides, I put down on my resume that I would eat anything, so it should've been obvious not to leave any unattended food close to my proximity."

Finally she asked him, "And Betsy?"

"I found her in the back with the strippers. They were teaching her how to put on her makeup."

Jackie's mouth hung open, "She's five! And she's supposed to do that with me, as I am her Godmother! And she was supposed to be at least eleven when I introduce her to lip gloss! But now that's all tainted as she learned from the strippers…" She folded her arms across her chest, grumbling, "Who're like Sam…"

Kelso screeched, "How do you think I feel? I saw my little girl practicing pole dancing and no father should see that! And when she told her teachers, they asked me what kind of occupation I had that includes poles! I had to tell them I was a firefighter! Now, in two weeks, they want me to teach their kids about fire prevention! Can you imagine? _Me_?! On _**fire prevention**_? If it was causing fires, then maybe I'll know a thing or two…."

"Like that time you set my house on fire?" She screeched.

He threw his hands up, "You caught me! I set your house on fire! I set the Police Academy on fire! I set the Forman's garage on fire! Okay, I'm guilty! Now what?"

She angrily pointed at him, "Maybe we should set you on fire!"

He laughed darkly, "Ha! Too late! I did that when I tested the firecracker suit last fall!"

Jackie tried to remain angry, but her last sentence came out with a hint of amusement, "You actually tested that stupid, old thing?"

When he nodded, he expected to be mentored about his behavior. Perhaps she would lecture him about the firecracker suit thing. Or she would go on about how bringing a child to a strip club was the worst idea in the world, something he figured out after he lost Betsy. But she only stared at him for a soft pause. Then she let herself smile, her eyes half-rolling and half- blinking. Seeing her gentler exposition toward him eased him enough to break out his classic Michael Kelso smile.

She reached over, giving him a hug, "Same old Michael."

His arms reached around her shoulders, chuckling, "Same old Jackie." When they pulled apart, she sighed, "I've missed you so much, but until this second I never realized how much. Just like life, huh? You never really know how much someone means to you until they're gone." Before Kelso could say another word, she broke down crying, "I ran off Little Jackie!"

Kelso's eyes bulged out of his head, his body stiffening as he yelped, "What's going on?! Who's Little Jackie? Why are you crying?! Don't cry, 'cause when you cry-" His big, brown eyes started tearing up, "I get to balling!"

Jackie tried to wipe away her tears before they started to ruin her makeup. She hiccupped, "Remember when we used to talk about our tiny Michaels and little Jackie's?"

Kelso nodded, his face red, his eyes puffed as he wheezed out, "Yeah?" His eyes popped out of his skull as he jumped back, "Holy crap, yer pregnant!" Instinctively he raised his hands, "I didn't touch her…_this_ time."

Jackie narrowed her eyes, dabbing them with a hanky she kept on hand, "Settle down, Tiger. I am not with child."

Kelso let out a huge sigh of relief. Jackie swatted his shoulder lightly, "Try not to look so relieved! And what did you have to worry about anyway? We haven't, um, had _relations _in over five years."

Kelso rubbed the back of his head, shrugging, "Yeah, after Betsy I've been a little jumpy about past relationships, like I'm sure you understand."

Jackie nodded, "Yeah, but back to Little Jackie-"

"Little what?"

"Little Jackie! She's my, well was, like…sort of…my _friend_?"

Kelso gave her a short look, "Your friend? But didn't we all make some weird pact never to replace one another-"

Jackie waved her hands, explaining, "No Michael, she's not replacing anybody! She's a sweet kid who's a little rough around the edges and comes from a bad home-"

Kelso commented, "Sounds like Hyde."

Jackie shook her head, so ever persistent to prove her point, "But she can be a bit shy and awkward. You should've seen her at the mall! She's under the impression everyone's better than her-"

Kelso pressed his index and middle finger to his chin, saying out loud, "Now it's Eric."

She continued to shake her head, ever so persistent, "And this morning she was singing some random pop song. I take it she's a music lover, I mean, she knew about the musical TV station. Y'know, the one with all the singing and dancing celebrities-"

Kelso's lips broke into a smile, "Singing and dancing? MTV? That's classic Fez! Well, minus the sneaking in closets bit."

Jackie concluded proudly, "But she's an all-around good kid. Now, I know she may have a bit of an imagination, like when she thought she saw Donna at the Forman's earlier today, but a good kid. And yes, she's also a little impulsive, but I can't hold that against her-"

Kelso fist pumped the air, "Imagination and impulsive? Man, can I relate!"

She narrowed her eyes, "No you cannot. She's impulsive about life decisions, like wanting a dead-end job with Todd-"

He thought for a moment before saying quietly, "I'm impulsive about life decisions."

She almost laughed, "You? You're kidding. Okay then, name one."

His brown eyes looked down, concentrating on the dashboard so hard that one could literally see the wheels turning in his head. Finally he spoke, a much more serious tone than she had heard come from him in a long while, "At the Forman's 25th Anniversary party, when I asked you to marry me. And, you turned me down."

Her beautiful face tightened, her eyes locking on him as never before. The corners of her mouth twitched, almost as if she wanted to say something but her thick tongue couldn't make its mind up as to what it wanted to say in the first place. Then her nose wrinkled slightly, causing Kelso to fallback on his boyish charm in a desperate attempt to salvage the conversation.

"So," he offered lamely, "What were you saying about Little Jackie?"

Concentrating on his strained voice, she shrugged, "She got upset; said I was trying too hard to turn her into me. Crazy, right?" She didn't expect him to say anything, but then again Michael was always full of surprises.

"This is gonna sound profound coming from me, but it seems to me that Little Jackie is everyone else instead of Jackie."

She didn't know how to respond to that, so she just didn't say anything. She only turned away from him and looked out her window. He did the same, peering out his window to the Greyhound Bus Station.

He watched handfuls of travelers, each piling into their selected bus, getting ready to go back home, or to leave it. It wasn't too long ago Donna was there, ready to leave for college in Madison.

"_I'll figure college out later, all I know is that I want to stay here with you." _

He felt tiny prickles pour down his shoulders. That was the worst decision Donna ever made, bless her heart. She stayed behind, tried to make the wedding go through for a marriage she was unsure of in the first place. But she did it for Eric. She did it for love. And then, a few months later, Eric leaves her at the altar during the wedding rehearsal. Donna was never the same. Kelso thought back, recollecting the first time he saw "blond Donna." He knew right there and then, it was the beginning of the end. That blond hair may have gotten her discounted clothes and free jelly donuts, but it changed the very reasons Eric tripped over himself to love her. But was the problem really blond hair or a broken heart? And the more Kelso thought about it, the more unsettled the pit of his stomach squeezed. He could just see them, together, side by side, nose to nose, the pair of them…Eric and Donna. Both overwhelmingly unhappy of how life turned out to be. Donna would complain in a drunken stupor that Eric was "spineless" and just let people "push him around." Meanwhile Eric would be sitting in a corner somewhere in his sweater vest, scratching his balding head while his boney fingers desperately rolled a joint to free him to another time. Finally, winded and tired, Donna would pull out her platinum locks of hair, ashamed of her mere reflection. All that makeup pounded on her face, that slinky purse over her shoulder, and a skirt two inches two short. Eric would then look up at her, unable to distinguish between the girl he once loved and the manicured monster he created in her. He would weakly say, "I love you." And she would respond likewise. They would close out the day staring at one another, in shock of what they did to one another…

His head started to hurt as the balding man in his mind that was supposed to be Eric morphed into him. A seventeen year old version of himself, with Pam Macy in one arm and Laurie in the other. The manicured monster morphed slowly from Donna to a sixteen year old little girl with brunette hair, a cheerleading outfit, and a hurt expression etched in her delicate face. In his mind, he could see her confusion, looking at him with the other women, asking pitifully, "Michael…why?" The blond girls by his side were drunk and high, giggling immensely. He let their soft voices trickle into his ears as he smiled stupidly at the cheerleader, "I love you, Jackie."

Hurt, the brunette took two steps back, shaking her head, crying. And what he noticed was that she never reciprocated his love back.

Finally Kelso tore his eyes away from the Greyhound Station and toward Jackie. It was a shame that she grew up so much, and she didn't even know it. When she felt her eyes on her, she asked him, her eyes smearing the steering wheel, "Do you ever think about how it used to be? Fez standing behind the couch, being extra pervy; Steven in his chair, watching TV and commenting on how stupid we were; me on your lap as we giggled over how cute we were; and Eric and Donna on the couch, talking or something."

He didn't verbally respond. He only reached to her small hand, enveloping it in his. When she looked at him sharply, he smiled weakly at her, "I'll always love you Jackie, you know that right?"

She nodded slowly.

He continued, images of Donna agreeing to stay with Eric at the bus terminal filling his head, "That night, when I asked you to marry me, for real, and you turned me down…look, you have to know that you made the right decision." Her eyes were getting foggy again. He scooted closer to her, hugging her tightly, "I have Brooke and Betsy now, but if you ever need anything, just call me up, okay?"

She wrapped her thin arms around him, burying her face in his chest which got his T-shirt wet with tears. She then admitted, "I'm scared."

He looked down at her, curious, "Of what?"

She replied somberly, her hands clinging onto his shoulders, "That it's all over. That there's nothing more. And I'm frozen in the '70s while the world moves on."

* * *

><p><strong>The lyrics in the very beginning belong to Madonna's "Borderline" (1984). I don't own it nor do I claim to. Also, "Holiday" is another one of hers. And in case anyone is wondering, I also don't own MTV. Bummer, right? <strong>


	11. Fenton

**CH.11 Fenton **

Jackie pulled the blue Mustang up to the small parking lot of Fez's apartment building. As her and Kelso solemnly got out of the vehicle, Kelso chanced a glance at her, saying, "C'mon Jackie, cheer up! We're gonna go see Fez!" He sounded as though seeing Fez was a real treat.

She let out a light smirk, barely shrugging.

Kelso then jumped in front of her, waving his arms around, "Jackie! C'mon, smile! You look like that time when you thought overalls were gonna make a comeback!"

She muttered under breath, "No, but _legwarmers_ are."

"Huh?"

She shrugged nonchalantly, "Nothing...I'm fine Michael, honestly."

"Honestly, you're lying."

A look of surprise shot on her face as she told him, "Lying?!"

He tried to explain quickly, "Jackie, you're not fine! Well, physically you're fine, but in the emotionally yer not!" He looked her up and down with that dog look of his, grinning, "Yeah, you are fine." He snapped out of it when she swatted his arm.

He screeched, "Damn Jackie!" while Jackie herself shook her head at him.

They entered the main entrance of the apartments, passing the mailboxes on the wall. Kelso had engulfed himself in a conversation about dogs, telling Jackie about how he once tried to convince Brooke adopt a puppy with him. They were about to take the stairs up to Fez's apartment when they heard a drawling voice behind them, "_Aaaaand_ what do you think _you two_ are doing?"

Slowly, Kelso and Jackie turned around. Behind the manager's front desk was Fenton, just as thin and bald as they remembered, however for some reason he decided to grow out a small handlebar mustache. Kelso couldn't help but chuckle at the sight of him, "Hello Capn' Crunch!"

Fenton, with his forefinger and thumb rubbing the end of his mustache, narrowed his eyes at the pair of them, "If you are referring to my stylish new mustache, then I take that as a compliment."

His eyes then darted over to Jackie, his brows furrowing, "Jackie Burkhart! I've heard you were back in town, but I refused to believe it, seeing as how I am the other half of your best friendship bracelet! But, then I suppose giving me a call to let me know you were back is simply too high of an expectation!"

Jackie could hear the faint disappointment in his words, even as he tried to cover it up. She walked over to him, shaking her head, "Fenton, I just got caught up, believe me-"

Haughtily, he nodded vigorously, "Oh, I believe you never even gave me a second thought!"

Kelso muttered under his breath, "I'm surprised she gave you a first thought."

Fenton snapped at him, waving a finger, "I heard that! And you should be nicer to me, especially here! For you see, in the Mellow Yellow Apartments, I am the landlord! That's right!" He stomped his foot, waving his hands as if introducing himself to the Queen of England, "The Landlord!"

Kelso and Jackie exchanged looks while Fenton slinked toward the counter, smirking triumphantly, "Yes, yes, the Lord of the Land."

Kelso opened his mouth to say a smart remark, but Fenton told him quickly, "If I were you, I'd bite my tongue! Perhaps if you were a bit more civilized and courteous toward others, you could stay in a stable relationship."

Both Jackie and Kelso's eyes popped out while Kelso shook his head angrily, "What're you talking about?! I'm in a great relationship!"

Fenton hummed the theme song to _Bye Bye Birdie_, acting as though he was suddenly interested in a magazine that was behind his counter. Between hums he shrugged casually, "That's not what I've heard."

Kelso's brown eyes widened as he realized what Fenton was talking about, the whole reason he was in Point Place to begin with: His fight with Brooke. She was so angry at him, she threw him out of their rented home. With pounds of pride, he shouted that he didn't need her and if he had to, he'd fight for full custody of Betsy. He had stormed off, taking barely a duffle bag and a gym bag, both of which had unknown contents that he assumed were his clothes. He had been planning to drive all the way to Point Place, until he noticed his tank was running on empty. Then he just stopped at a greyhound station, bought a ticket, and phoned Mrs. Forman to inform her that he was coming home.

But how Fenton came ahold of this information so fast was lost on him. With his cheeks flushed with irritation on that the landlord knew his private business, Kelso blurted, "So one fight- ONE- stupid fight and it's my fault, huh? Huh?! Just, blame the guy in the relationship!"

Fenton rolled up his magazine, his tone sounding both impressed and offended, "Rather presumptuous of you, to assume you're the 'man' in the relationship."

Kelso's face dropped. He hotly retorted, "Is that a crack at me not wearing the pants in the relationship because I get plenty of that from my mother in law!"

Fenton placed the magazine aside, quipping, "Testy, testy…" Before either Kelso or Jackie could speak, Fenton cast his eyes aside from them, a small smile teetering on his lips. As Jackie lightly touched his arm, Kelso narrowed his eyes, "What's so funny?"

Fenton shrugged, clearing his throat as if he was just thinking of something rather amusing, "Oh nothing…" Jackie pulled Kelso's arm, "Michael, let's go see Fez-" At this, Fenton looked up, surprised, "After all you and Fez have been through, you're still going to go see him?"

Kelso nodded, "Fez is my friend! We've been through so much together and if you think I'm gonna stop in town without saying a 'hello' to my little buddy, then you're wrong!"

Fenton seemed touched. His eyes went over to Jackie as he said, "I wished everyone's sentiments were like that!" He then worked his way around the counter, grabbing ahold of Kelso's overgrown shoulders, saying formally, "As much as I loath Fez, he had what any one of us wants!" While Kelso's anger was subsiding away, his head nodding with his typical grin at Fenton's new demeanor, it was Jackie who was now wondering what the hell was going on. Fenton then hugged Kelso, whispering loudly, "My heart goes out to you. I know how much you wanted to raise your daughter with him! He doesn't deserve you. And I hope one day you'll find a man who truly loves and appreciates you."

Jackie's eyes widened, "A what that appreciates who?"

Fenton continued, "A man who appreciates him, why of course!"

Jackie turned to Kelso, not quite being able to fathom went Fenton meant by this. Kelso, on the other hand, still didn't catch on and gushed, "Oh, Fez appreciates me!"

Jackie couldn't help but hold out a hand, "Wait, stop, stop…what're we talking about?"

Fenton placed his hands on his hips, "Why we are speaking of this man's and Fez's failed relationship."

She spit out, "What relationship?"

Kelso cleared his voice, "He means _friendship_, Jackie."

Jackie shook her head, "I don't think that's what he means!"

Fenton looked over at Kelso as though this was the most obvious thing in the world, "Weren't you and Fez in love?"

Kelso nodded, "Yeah, me and Fez were in…wait, what?" Kelso began shaking his head wildly, "No! No, why would you even think that?!"

"Because you're gay."

Kelso screeched, "I'm not gay!"

Fenton placed his hands across his chest, "Are you sure? Even I've heard about that sexy nurse dream you had about Fez-"

Kelso jumped, "Nu-uh! That was the sexy nurse dream _Fez_ had about _me_!"

Jackie's eyebrows raised, "Are you talking about that dream that you got freaked out about and went over to talk to me, only for Steven to assume _I_ was cheating on him?"

Kelso shouted over at her, "Jackie, this isn't about you and Hyde; it's about me and Fez!" He then turned toward Fenton, "Why would you even think I'm gay?!"

Fenton told him, "You were so progressive!"

Jackie rolled her eyes, "If by 'progressive' you mean 'slept with anything in a skirt', then yes, he was very progressive."

Fenton waved his hands at Kelso, "Well, you and Fez were two men willing to raise a child together!"

Kelso blurted, "Me and Fez just wanted to move in together 'cause we were buds!"

"That is not what Mr. Forman told me when we all signed the lease!"

Jackie and Kelso's mouths dropped, "RED?!"

Fenton nodded, "Yes! I remember I hated Fez, and was absolutely, under any circumstances, was NOT going to lease him an apartment here at Mello Yellow. But then, Mr. Forman so kindly informed me that Fez would be residing with you and the two of you would be raising a child together! He implied that you two were… _progressive_. And, I was so touched by such an act, so inspired by you and Fez (though I detest him), I was willing to overlook my disposition to help a young family out… but if I had known the truth, I never would have let you two set foot in this apartment!"

Kelso snapped his fingers, "I knew something was fishy that day! Red kept lookin' at me and Fez from his rearview mirror, laughing!"

Fenton however, seemed oddly relieved, "I let Fez live here out of pity how his life with you turned out, but if there never was a life with you, I shall go and evict his skin-tight jeaned ass out of this apartment!"

"No!" Jackie jumped, "Fenton, please, Fez loves it here! If he loses this place because of what was said today-"

Fenton looked her up and down, "Well you give me one good reason not to kick him out!"

Jackie didn't say a word. Instead, she held up her arm, showing him her half of their Best Friends Forever bracelet. Fenton stared at her for a long second before quickly wiping his right eye. He then showed her his half of the bracelet, nodding, "Alright, I'll keep the foreigner. Heaven knows why, you didn't even give me a call-" Jackie quickly told him, "How about lunch tomorrow? We can go to that new Chinese Restaurant on High Street."

Fenton checked his nails, shrugging, "I don't know…"

She added, "I'll bring vodka."

He perked right up, smiling, "Now we're talking!"

Jackie quickly hugged Fenton, Kelso rolling his eyes in the background, muttering, "Why does Fenton get vodka? If he gets vodka, I should get a six pack of beer!" Jackie pulled back from Fenton, hushing Kelso.

Fenton pulled back, smiling, "Don't quote me on this, but I do so miss having you kids around. All doing whatever it is you do… say," Fenton gave Jackie a quizzical look, "Whatever happened to that young man you were going to marry?"

"Michael?" Jackie tried, pointing at Kelso over her shoulder.

"No, the other one."

"Steven?" She tried again.

"No, no, the _other _one."

"…uh," she thought very hard, "You don't mean Fez?"

"Oh, of course not!" Fenton cried out, aghast.

Kelso chuckled, "Damn Jackie, how many people were you gonna marry?"

She glared at him quickly, but that glare was soon replaced by a look of shock as Fenton snapped his fingers, "Oh, now I remember! Eric Forman!"

Kelso choked on his own spit, "What?!" Jackie's face fell apart, "Who?" Kelso grinned over at Jackie, "No wonder yer all wrapped up about Donna coming back! She finds out yer gonna marry Eric and she'll snap you in half!"

Jackie sputtered out, "I'm not- I _never_… I don't like Eric that way!"

"But you liked _Fez _that way." Kelso muttered, smirking.

"Oh, you shut up!" Jackie barked over to him. His chuckles died down, but his brown eyes were dancing with amusement. She then turned back to Fenton, "How could you even _think_ that I would be with _Eric Forman_!"

Fenton shrugged, "When I used to work for the mall, I caught you two trying on a tuxedo and a wedding gown. Both of you were standing shoulder to shoulder, grinning from ear to ear…" He looked up with a fantasy-like stare before saying, "I also distinctly remember telling that Eric fellow that he _traded up_ when he turned in that redhead for you."

Jackie, still trying to remain mad even though she was flattered, batted her eyelashes, "Well, as truthful as that last statement was, I was **never** going to marry Eric. We were just modeling the wardrobe for when he married Donna and when I married Steven."

Fenton asked her, already knowing the answer, "So did you marry Steven?"

"Well, no." Jackie admitted.

"Did Eric marry the redhead?"

"Uh, no…well, maybe. I don't know! I don't think so!" Jackie mumbled, biting her lip.

Fenton threw up his arms, "Then is it any surprise I thought you were with this Eric Forman?!"

"Well, it was a surprise to me!" Jackie countered, looking over her shoulder to see Kelso smiling at the thought of Jackie being in a relationship with Eric. He mouthed to her, "Don't let Donna find out!" He then made a motion of his finger slicing his neck.

Jackie had the urge to throw the coat rack at him. She then turned around to Fenton, "Look, Fenton, Eric is a nice guy, but he's not for me!"

Fenton looked up dreamily, "Pity, I could just imagine you with Eric…"

Kelso bolted toward Fenton, excitedly chanting, "Imagine! Imagine!"

Jackie slapped Kelso's arm, snapping at Fenton, "Don't you dare _imagine_ a damn thing or I'll-"

**Fenton's Fantasy: **

In a black and white suburb in 1950s USA, in a quant kitchen with a round table that looked suspiciously like the Forman's kitchen, sat a young man in a pressed grey suit. With a pipe in his mouth, reading glasses sitting comfortably on his nose and a newspaper in his hands, sat none other than Eric Forman. By the white, luxurious stovetop was a woman in a pink dress-

**The Real World: **

"That is stupid!" Jackie squealed, hot in the face. She didn't want to admit it, but deep down she had had the same fantasy but with both Kelso and Hyde.

Kelso nodded, "Yeah! Eric can't have reading glasses! He's only twenty-four!"

Jackie rolled her eyes, "Oh, who cares about that?! I'm talking about the whole scenario!"

Kelso nodded again, telling Fenton, "Oh, I know what Jackie's talkin' about! If everything is black and white, how come Jackie's dress is pink?"

The ex-cheerleader thought she was going to kick Kelso in the head. Then it was Fenton who said, "Good thinking! Now let me think-"

"Oh no you don't!" Jackie snapped, but then Fenton continued.

**Fenton's Fantasy- Again: **

In a lightly colored version of a suburb in 1950s USA, in a quant, yellow kitchen with a round table, sat a young man in a pressed navy blue suit. With a pipe in his mouth and the morning news held tightly in his hands, sat none other than Eric Forman. By the white, luxurious stovetop was a woman in a pink dress. With a pearl necklace draped around her neck and not a single hair out of place, she stirred the eggs in the frying pan. She told her husband, a pleasant smile on her face, "Dear? Would you prefer blueberry pancakes or regular?"

Eric looked up from the paper, pondering the thought, "Beloved, how about we skip the pancakes for today and just have the eggs and bacon." He then returned to his paper, smiling and saying with a French accent, "mmm, _bacon_."

**Reality: **

Jackie pinched Kelso's arm, "Stop helping Fenton!"

Kelso told her, "Well it's what Eric would've said! Besides," He turned to Fenton, "Look man, I know your trying to go for a whole 'perfect' thing, but I think you're story is missing something."

"Yeah," Jackie muttered, "A touch of reality."

Kelso snapped his fingers, "That's it! Hey Fenton, let me point your story in the right direction!"

Fenton looked Kelso up and down before smirking, "Point away!"

**Kelso's Version of Fenton's Fantasy:**

Back in the kitchen, as Jackie stirred eggs, a crazed lunatic pressed their face against the sliding glass. Jackie looked up, and dropped the spatula. Eric, alarmed, rose to his feet. He darted to the sliding door in time to see Donna, red eyed and angry. She pointed at Jackie, screaming like the Wicked Witch of the West, "I'll get you my pretty!" She then looked over at Eric, "And your little husband too!"

**Reality: **

Kelso was whooping with laughter, but both Fenton and Jackie seemed unamused. Kelso wiped a tear from his eye, snorting, "Ooo-Ooo! Wait, wait! I got a good one! And then Jackie could be the good witch, and Eric can be Dorothy!" The thought of Eric in pigtails with a blue checkered dress, carrying a picnic basket and wearing red, sparkling shoes was enough to send Kelso off in hysterics.

"And you can be Toto." Jackie retorted bitterly. She never thought it was possible, but Kelso managed to turn a beloved childhood classic and turn it into something she'd rather forget.

Fenton seemed to agree with her. He folded his arms across his chest, "You have ruined both the _Wizard of Oz_ and my story! Now sir, this is how one conducts a true tale!"

**Back to Fenton's Fantasy: **

In the Forman's Kitchen, in what was implied as "present day", sat twenty-four year old Eric Forman. He was eating cold cereal, and skimming over one of his old Mighty Spectaculas comics. By the stove counter was Jackie, leaning against the counter and reading a new Cosmo she had just bought that morning.

Eric looked at his cold cereal and then to Jackie, who was just standing there, reading. He said slowly, "You know, if you wanted to, you could make something to eat. Like, like eggs or something."

Jackie, without looking up, said, "I don't have to. We're not married. This isn't the '50s. And I don't even like you. So if you want eggs, just make yourself a couple. Stove's right here and I bet your appetite isn't going anywhere."

Eric looked down at his bowl, muttering, "But I don't wanna."

Jackie looked up from her magazine, shutting it, "Well, _I_ don't wanna!"

Miserably looking down, Eric groaned, "I miss Donna! Ever since I came back from Africa, she's been ignoring me!"

Jackie raised an eyebrow, "She's in Madison, in college. She's probably studying."

"Yeah!" Eric wheeled around his seat and walked over to Jackie, explaining, "But she doesn't pick up my calls, she doesn't return my calls, and if I call- she pretends I didn't!"

"Well why don't you just go over there?" Jackie asked him as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Eric fidgeted slightly before sighing, "I would but…"

"You're lazy." Jackie concluded flatly. She then returned to her magazine, opening it again. Eric's eyes widened as he denied, "I am not lazy! I'm just scared!"

"Scared of what?" Jackie scoffed, "I know Donna can be a bit intimidating at times, but certainly not enough to scare you!"

Eric yelled, "I'm scared that I'll go there and she'll be with another guy! A big guy! A successful guy! Someone who won't solve their problems by going a million miles away!"

Jackie's expression softened, and she slid her magazine away from her. She faced him, taking in a deep breath, "Look Eric, you've made some mistakes. But, if you're honest with Donna, then everything will work out. It always does with you two."

Eric gloomily sat back down on the kitchen table, snorting, "Yeah, like how everything worked out with you and Hyde? I heard about how you two broke up, about the hotel room in Chicago and the stripper. The whole town knows."

Jackie whipped his chair around so that she could look Eric in the eye when she hissed at him, "_Don't you dare bring that up!_"

Eric slouched, mumbling, "I told you, not everything works out fine."

Jackie looked down, her face as gravely serious as Eric's. Then he looked up, his eyes unusually dim, "Do you think Donna really is with another guy?"

Turning away from him, Jackie shrugged, "I…I don't know." Even though she didn't see him, she felt his depression. She could imagine him there, slouching on the chair, waiting for the phone to ring and hear his lover's voice. It was something that she herself had been doing for quite some time. But Hyde wasn't going to call her, and Donna wasn't going to call Eric.

She couldn't help but make her way over to the stove, saying with false cheerfulness, "Hey Eric, how about some pancakes? Do you want blueberry or regular?"

Eric smacked his forehead against the counter, sniffing, "Neither. I just want Donna."

"I can't give you Donna." She said, her tone in distress, "But maybe some bacon? Or hash browns? I know I'm not that great of a cook, but I promise that I know how to make hash browns." She looked around the kitchen before pressing her forefinger to her chin, "I'm gonna need potatoes, right? It's been awhile since I've seen my old cook make it."

Eric looked up at the ceiling as if expecting God to come crashing down from the heavens and explain why Donna wasn't returning his calls. He croaked, "I can still remember her perfume…"

"Perfume? I'll tell you what that was- it was pizza. She had a few slices almost every day!" Jackie said sourly.

He sniffed, looking down at his hands, "I remember how she felt in my arms…so warm, and soft."

"You know what those arms need now?" Jackie interrupted, going over to him. She placed a spatula in one and a frying pan in the other. She said triumphantly, "To cook! You'll help me wrestle up the bacon while I make the pancakes! It'll clear your head and everything!"

The spatula and pan slipped out of his hands and he burst into tears. He grabbed Jackie's hips, burying his face in her waist, sobbing, "_Donna!_ Donna…"

At first she was startled, but after a quick second, she began to feel bad for him. She was sure his heartache for Donna was just as bad as hers for Hyde, but Hyde was a second love. The heartache of leaving your first love was one she didn't care to repeat. It was a searing pain of hopelessness and despair to know that what was once so innocent was now over. It was a searing pain, a burning lump in the chest, and it had a way of making you think that the world wasn't going to end tomorrow, because it was ending today.

She softly patted the top of his brown hair, fully understanding his pain too well, "It's okay, Eric. It'll get better eventually, I promise."

He snuffled and sniffed, and looked up at her with glassy eyes, "You…you're sure?"

She nodded gently, wiping his bangs away from his eyes, "Yeah."

He loosened his grip on her, and she knelt down beside him, "It'll be tough, but we can make it through."

"We?" He sniffed. Then he thought of her similar trouble with Hyde and nodded, "Oh, yeah… _we_." He quickly wiped his eyes and nose with some brown napkins that were on the table, before nodding, "Yeah. Okay."

He looked up at her, giving her a weak smile, "Okay…"

She smiled back and leaned in to what was supposed to be a hug, only for Eric to turn his head slightly and kiss her right on the mou-

**Reality: **

"STOP!" Jackie shouted, her heart racing. Kelso could've sworn she was sweating. She then said, her voice extremely shrill, "That would never happen in a million years!"

Kelso ignored her and turned to Fenton, "And then what?"

"Michael!" Jackie screeched.

Kelso told her, "Jackie, it was gettin' good!"

"Nothing was getting good! It was all terrible!" She looked back at Fenton, glaring, "With stories like that running around, no wonder Eric nor Donna want to come back home!"

Fenton casually shrugged, looking at his fingernails, apparently bored, "I thought it was pretty spicy."

Kelso agreed, "Yeah, like it sounded like it could've happened!" He motioned for Jackie to agree but all Jackie could do was shout, "I don't like Eric like that!"

Fenton gave her a look, "Oh really, Jackie? Well, if you don't, you should. Everyone suspects that the redhead is cheating on him with the one with curly hair and the aviators."

Jackie narrowed her eyes, almost seething as she vividly recollected Pam Macy's smugness, "What the hell makes you think _Donna is with Steven?_"

Fenton told her as if he were gossiping, "Well, Dedra Lipton told Francine Hopkins, who got it from overhearing the Thompkins couple, who were at the mall the other day and found out from Pam Macy that Donna could be with Hyde!"

And as if a light clicked on in her head, Jackie felt a strange sensation overtake her. It was a strange sort of calming peace. For the first time since she had her chat with Pam Macy, Jackie honestly feel that Steven wasn't with Donna. She now felt certain the entire thing was a rumor, some crack-pot story that was cooked up, just like the one that Fenton made up right before her and Kelso's eyes. She couldn't help but feel overwhelmingly foolish for believing Pam Macy.

She tilted her head to one side, saying genuinely to Fenton, "Thanks."

He seemed surprised, "For what?"

"For helping me tell the difference between fact and fiction." She then turned to see Kelso, "C'mon Michael, let's go see Fez."

Leaving Fenton to wonder what she was talking about, Jackie pushed Kelso up the stairs to go see their friend. But, all Kelso could do was whine about how he wanted Fenton to finish the story. Down by the front entrance, Fenton looked down at a pencil and pad.

**The Story: **

He looked up at her, giving her a weak smile, "Okay…"

She smiled back and leaned in to what was supposed to be a hug, only for Eric to turn his head slightly and kiss her right on the mouth.

Surprised, Jackie jumped back. She got after him, "Eric, no!" Wiping her mouth with her sleeve, she shook her head, "That's not what I meant by 'we'!"

Eric scrambled to his feet, his eyes red and his tone pleading, "Jackie, please… I need you! Just for one night! Please, I promise we can say it never happened! I just… I haven't been with anyone in over three years and I'm past the point of no return here!"

"Making you pancakes is one thing, but sleeping with you is another!" Jackie cried out, though a part of her was flattered by the option. But, when he reached out to her, she pushed him back, growing upset, "Eric, you need to settle down!"

He swallowed the lump in his throat, reaching out for her again, "Just _one_ night! Just one… _please_."

He seemed so utterly desperate. Her lips twisted. She wanted so much to say "no," but the pitiful look he was giving her wouldn't allow it. And then again, she thought, would sleeping with Eric really be so bad? Sighing, she tried to seem upset as she shrugged, "Okay, but just this _once_."

But it wouldn't be just once, it would be a lifetime.

**Reality: **

Fenton looked back up from his pad and scribbled down a few more notes, telling himself, "This is good! I could turn this into a best seller! And," he scribbled some more, "I think I'll give them a daughter called Dorothy around chapter eleven."

He was so busy quickly jotting down his thoughts that he didn't notice a blond woman with broad shoulders, wearing blue jeans and a T-shirt, peek inside the apartment lobby. When the blond was satisfied that both Jackie and Kelso had gone upstairs, she turned around and headed back into the parking lot. She didn't want to be seen again, since earlier that day a teenage girl did catch her sneaking inside the Forman's garage.

She had passed several cars until stopping in front of a blue mustang. It was Jackie's car. The woman with the blond hair sighed, and stepped toward it. Taking out a straightened hanger to jimmy the lock open, she muttered to herself, "OK, it's time to separate fact from fiction."


	12. Laurie

**CH. 12 Laurie **

Jackie and Kelso headed to the third floor, Kelso telling Jackie, "Can you believe that guy? Me? Gay?"

As they trudged over to Fez's apartment door, Jackie narrowed her eyes at Kelso, "And you certainly didn't help! Encouraging that ludicrous story about me with Eric!"

Kelso smiled at that, "It got you mad, right?"

"Very!" Jackie huffed.

This made Kelso's smile broaden, and Jackie responded by swatting his arm. She told him like an adult speaking to a child, "It's not very funny." She then turned to the door, knocking as she said, "Ugh, I wish Fez would open the door already… I have to go to the bathroom."

He smirked, "One or Two?"

"Ew!" She snapped, "Neither! I have to reapply my makeup!"

Kelso leaned against a wall, shrugging, "Girls and their makeup. I don't know how I'm gonna do it with Betsy."

She then thought of something. She reached for her purse, telling Kelso, "You know what? I forgot that when I moved out, I never gave back the key! I bet Fez hasn't even changed the locks so-" She pulled out a tiny golden key, smirking, "Look what I found!" At the exact same moment, Kelso pulled out a similar key, saying, "Oh-Oh! I just remembered!" Both stared at the golden key that the other had before looking at their own. Jackie got after Kelso, "Michael! You never turned in _your _key?"

Kelso countered, "Well, neither did you!"

Jackie rolled her eyes. She was about to press her key inside the lock when the door creaked open. Jackie thought this was strange, "The door wasn't locked?" Kelso's eyes widened, "Hey, maybe there's a burglar!" She shushed him, secretly hoping he was wrong. The duo cautiously stepped inside, only to drop their guard when they saw a very attractive blond sitting on the couch, reading TV Guide.

"Laurie." Both Kelso and Jackie said simultaneously. The blond looked up, narrowing her green eyes, "Oh, if it isn't half of the Scooby gang."

Kelso beamed at this comparison, "I'm so Fred!"

Jackie nodded, "And I'm obviously Daphne."

Laurie snorted, standing up, "Both of you are obviously a pair of dumbasses. Now, what do you want?" Before they could speak, Laurie zeroed in on Kelso, "Wait a minute- you're not supposed to be here!"

Kelso shrugged, "Why not?"

Laurie said loudly, "'Cause Fez went to go pick you up at the Greyhound over an hour ago!"

Jackie cut in, "Why would Fez-"

"Because my mom couldn't find you!" Laurie snapped at Jackie, "Apparently you and Donna 2 were nowhere to be seen! Mom panicked, didn't want Kettlehead here to show up at the house, stir up old memories of how he set the garage on fire, and for my dad to put his foot up his ass!" Laurie then placed her hands on her hips, "Where is Donna 2?"

"Little Jackie!" Jackie snapped before taking in a breath, "And she's busy."

Laurie snorted, "Busy trying to get away from you, I bet."

"Oh, shut up!" Jackie growled.

At that moment, Fez rushed inside, looking very agitated. He said, "I feel like I have been on a merry-go-round! I searched everywhere for Kelso and I cannot find him an-" He stopped when he saw his friend. Kelso opened his arms, smiling, "Fez!"

Fez brightened up considerably, jumping into Kelso's arms, "Kelso!"

Fez kissed Kelso's ear, saying, "I have missed you so much!"

Kelso laughed, "I missed you too! Having fun is so weird without you!"

As the boys reminisced about old times, Laurie led Jackie to the kitchen. She asked her if she wanted something to drink. Jackie thought about it, and decided a tea would be a good choice. Laurie popped open the fridge, shaking her head, "Um, yeah. Fresh outta tea. Anything else?"

"Um…coffee?"

"Don't got any."

"Juice?"

"Nope."

"Soda?"

"Nu-uh."

"Milk?" Jackie asked, raising an eyebrow.

Laurie shook her head, "Maybe tomorrow."

Jackie asked her, "Well then, what _do_ you have?"

Laurie took out a couple of beer bottles, "Beer." She then pointed at the faucet on kitchen sink, "And water."

Jackie took the bottle Laurie capped open for her. Leaning against the counter, Jackie shook her head, "If your mother knew how you drank-"

Laurie took a sip out of her bottle, "Are you kidding? I learned how to drink from both my parents. In fact, it's a damned miracle I'm not an alcoholic."

Jackie looked over at the refrigerator, ignoring Laurie's comment. "So, do you cook?"

Laurie shook her head, "The only thing in there is a bottle of olives, a brick of cheese and cold cream."

Jackie found herself gulping the bottle, unable to see herself finishing a conversation with Laurie without it. Laurie nodded over to the boys who were play wrestling in the living room, "So, without Donna 2, you and the Big Baboon were alone together, huh?"

Nodding, Jackie shrugged, "Well, yeah."

Laurie eyed her suspiciously, "You didn't do anything stupid, right?"

"Like what?"

"Like kiss him."

Jackie's eyes popped out of her head at the mere thought of it. She slammed her bottle on the counter, hissing, "No! _Never_!"

Laurie took another sip from her bottle, "Just making sure."

Then they head Kelso telling Fez, "You'll never believe it! Red told Fenton we were gay! That's how come he gave us the apartment!" They also heard Fez sucking in his breath, "Us?! Gay?! How could he think that?! I, Fez, am a masculine specimen! And you, Kelso, are a _beautiful _masculine specimen!"

They could hear Kelso gush, "Aw, Fez! You're beautiful too!"

Fez looked down bashfully, "But nowhere near as exquisite as you!"

Kelso nodded, grinning from ear to ear, "Yeah, that's true. But you're still a very attractive man!"

Fez playfully swatted his arm, "Oh stop it! You are embarrassing me!"

In the kitchen, Jackie and Laurie stared at them with repulsed faces. Laurie looked over at Jackie, "That whole deal about Fenton… that true? Did he really think they were gay?"

Jackie found herself digging in the refrigerator for another bottle of beer, mumbling, "Yup. All true."

Laurie watched as Kelso and Fez complimented each other's hair. She shook her head, "I don't know what's more sadder. The fact that I bedded both those morons or that I could actually imagine them being a couple."

Jackie, now on her second bottle, leaned on the counter right next to Laurie. She shrugged, "I can relate." Laurie nodded, turning her head to get a better look at Jackie. Like her, Jackie knew what it was like to go out with both Kelso and Fez. With this in mind, Laurie nodded "Yeah, that's right." The clacked their bottles together, Laurie saying, "To having the most peculiar taste in men." Jackie agreed, "Amen." As they drank together, Kelso was showing Fez all the pictures of Betsy he had in his wallet. Fez was upset to find that Kelso kept 22 pictures of Betsy, but only 15 him. He huffed, folding his arms as he told Kelso, "So I supposed I am not so important to you!" Jackie rolled her eyes at this. She knew for a fact that Kelso only kept 2 pictures of her.

Kelso laughed, going on and on about how he missed Fez when he went to the carnival or when him and Brooke took Betsy to the movies. Fez seemed touched, "So you did think of me?"

Kelso told him, "Of course! You're my little buddy!"

"So," Laurie burped, asking Jackie, "What have you been up to today? Searching for a job?"

"No," Jackie conceded, finishing up her second beer, "Been searching for my life. Like, I used to be Jackie Burkhart! I was voted head cheerleader by the largest margin in cheerleading history! I was Snow Queen my Senior Year in High School! It was widely acknowledged that I was the cutest girl in school! And now look at me!" Jackie's shoulders slumped as she continued, the alcohol clearly loosening her tongue, "Today I ran off Little Jackie… I got _two _tickets…My folks are gone. I'm homeless. I'm broke. I have no job. I have no boyfriend. I have no kids. My life is a mess!"

Regretting that she asked Jackie such a thing, Laurie decided to change the subject. But Jackie continued, more bitter than ever, "Fez has you! Michael has the family he never wanted to begin with but loves now! Steven has Grooves! And what about homely, good-old- fashioned Eric Forman and his forward thinking girlfriend Donna Pinciotti? Well, I'll tell you! They're off living their happy little lives, not even looking back at us!"

Instinctively Laurie wanted to rub the pain in even more, but before she could add that her little brother and his girlfriend may even have a kid or two, Jackie grabbed her bottle and threw it inside the trashcan with so much force that it shattered.

In the living room, Kelso and Fez stopped talking and looked over to the kitchen curiously.

Laurie said, "Okay, okay- calm the hell down!"

Jackie added, finally letting the turmoil of the day out, "You know how stupid I was?! I actually _believed_ in fairytales! I waited for my Prince Charming and got playboys and cheap, emotionless jerks!" She made an impression of Hyde, using her fingers as mock sunglasses, "I'm not ready yet, Jackie! I want to be sure when I get married! Oh, wait! Look! Some Vegas stripper! I don't even know her name but lemme marry her and forget about you, loser!"

Laurie eyed the kitchen knives, afraid Jackie would use them. Jackie smacked her hand on her forehead, perplexed, "Love…it chooses and chooses…but it never chose me." Laurie backed over toward the knives, trying to hide them with her body as Jackie rambled on, "Why wasn't I chosen, huh? Why was Donna, huh? Can someone pleaze answer me that! I mean, Donna didn't even want a boyfriend, and somehow that bitch got the best one!"

Fez and Kelso walked into the kitchen, both ducking low in case Jackie flung something at them. Kelso said calmly, "Jackie… Donna is your best friend."

Jackie laughed bitterly, "Friend? **Friend?!** What kind of friend ditches the girl who looks up to her for YEARS!"

Fez was shocked, "You looked up to Donna? You mean, because she was tall, right?"

Laurie agreed, "Freakishly tall. I think we all looked _up_ to her."

Jackie sat at the kitchen table, catching her breath as she admitted, "She was supposed to be my best friend… and she just left me. I guess, I guess I knew Eric didn't really care for me but I thought Donna did." She looked down at her hands, mumbling pathetically, "I didn't realize how little I meant to her."

Kelso, Fez and Laurie exchanged looks. It appeared that none of them knew what to say to Jackie. But it was Fez who offered a simple, "Look, we are all hurting from their passing…"

Kelso rolled his eyes, jabbing Fez in the stomach, "Dude, they're not dead!"

Laurie glared at both of them, shoving her way forward, "Look, Jackie, things change-"

Jackie hiccupped, shouting hoarsely, "Well it wasn't supposed to change like this!"

Laurie threw up her arms, "And why the hell not?!"

Before Jackie could bite her tongue, she confessed loudly, "Because me and Donna made a pact!"

Kelso gave her a quizzical look, "Chicks don't make pacts! It's a dude thing!"

Both Jackie and Laurie snapped, "Shut up, Kelso!" Before Laurie asked Jackie, more out of curiosity than concern, "What kind of pact?"

Jackie leaned back in the chair, sniffing, "Um…it's kind of groggy in my mind but, Donna was having issues…like she was having trouble talking with her dad because he did dumb things all the time and her mom had just left. I told her that I would always be there for her. And then, with me, my folks were gone a lot. Like, my dad couldn't be bothered to go to his own daughter's birthday parties and my mom whored around with the guys that showed up! One year- she even did it with a clown! But when he was hauled off to prison and my mom just flew away to Mexico, it was embarrassing more than anything. And then she let me live with her. I asked her why, later on, and she told me that when I told her that I'd be there for her, she decided to do the same for me." She raised her hands, admitting, "Now she didn't _want_ to. She bitched and groaned for forever, but she was always adamant that I stay somewhere I felt safe. And living with her and Bob, and being right next door with the Forman's and Steven…I felt safe there." Bitterly Jackie smirked, "Flash forward to now. My life is in shambles…and she's not here for me." Everyone stared at her as she nodded glumly, "I know, it's stupid."

The boys looked very uncomfortable and out of their element. Laurie however, seemed oddly at ease. The blond woman stared at the younger girl for a moment before sighing, "It's not stupid."

She calmly sat next to Jackie, confessing, "I may have- and don't you dare tell my mom- but I _may_ have been, well, been thinking of my stupid little brother a lot too. Like, I was real rough with him, but he's family, y'know?"

"…Little Jackie has been asking all day about him and Donna."

Laurie tried her best not to roll her eyes as she sighed, "Jackie, that kid barely knew my brother and the neighbor girl."

"She was asking-"

"Maybe _you_ were asking, you just had too much pride to say it was you."

Jackie was stunned. She countered defensively, "Show me proof!"

Laurie smirked sadly, "You called her 'Little Jackie'. Maybe that was your subconscious trying to tell you that _a_ Jackie was asking for her friends, instead of you. But, in reality, you were the one asking. You were projecting yourself onto Donna 2. It's not bad, it's just that you couldn't come to terms with it, you're pride wouldn't let you."

And just like that Jackie suddenly felt very exposed, as if she walked into a crowded train station completely naked. She couldn't help her body as it tensed, or her mouth as it hung lamely on her face. What Laurie had said didn't strike her like a bolt of lightning, it touched her like a whisper in a storm.

Kelso's eyes widened, "Whoa…Laurie, that was freakin' profound!"

Fez smiled down at his girlfriend, "Isn't she something?"

Laurie nodded at both boys, "Yeah, I took a phycology course in college. I got a B-."

Kelso raised an eyebrow, "B- in a college course…nice."

Breathing slowly, Jackie asked cautiously, "Why am I…searching for them?"

Laurie shrugged, "From what I hear, you were more attached to Donna than you cared to admit. Maybe it was because she took you in when you had no home, or that she constantly put up with you saying her shoes were huge-"

Out of habit Jackie cut in, "They were humongous!"

Laurie smirked, continuing, "Maybe it was because she was the only other girl in the group. Hell, maybe it was all those reasons and more."

Again Jackie cut in, "She wanted to be a journalist. I never saw a woman who wanted to go to college for herself and not to attract a man. I guess…well, I would've liked to be like that."

Nodding, Laurie continued, "All the above and then some. So, you looked up to her. And in my opinion, you looked up to her even more when she got involved with my brother. Now, we both know it wasn't him as much as the love they shared. I think you saw that, and you desperately wanted that for yourself. So, using their relationship as a template, you began asking for more out of the current relationship that you had, which was with Kettlehead." Laurie eyes Kelso before continuing, "But when it flopped, you decided that a more mature man was in order. You needed someone who would take love seriously, so you moved onto Hyde. Then that didn't turn out so good. So then you made one final stab, thinking that if Donna could make it with a friend turned boyfriend, so could you."

Fez raised his hand, "Ooo, Ooo, I come in, right?"

Laurie rolled her eyes, "Whatever, sure. But then that fell apart. So, you decided to focus on your career and move far, far away from here and start fresh."

Jackie looked down, actually embarrassed that Laurie assessed her actions quite well. The blond woman nodded, "So you figured if you couldn't be lucky in love like Donna, at least you could have a job like hers. Instead of writing, you turned to photography- deep down you didn't want anyone breaking down that you were channeling a certain redhead, because again- you had you're pride. But then that fell though, and I wouldn't be surprised if it did because it wasn't you. There was no passion for it. I mean Jackie, who the hell were you trying to kid? You would rather be the person who is being photographed than the person doing the photographing!"

The brunette shifted uncomfortably in her seat, still looking down. She wanted to look up and tell Laurie she was wrong, but she just couldn't. As dumb as she felt, Jackie felt a great sense of self suddenly coming together inside her. It was as if her heart was a jigsaw puzzle that she recklessly scattered all over the floor. For years she had been trying to collect the pieces together. She had shoved pieces together that didn't fit, she had lost other pieces, and for the most part only succeeded in creating half collected sections together. But here, at the table, listening to Laurie of all people, she could magically feel the puzzle pieces of her heart finally coming together to make a picture.

Laurie shook her head, "Look Jackie, take it from someone who knows. When you run away from a place, the problems don't stay in the place you ran away from. And you wanna know why? 'Cause they're your problems. You end up taking them with you. So, no matter how far you go, the same problems will always be whispering in the back of yer head. So it's best to grow a pair and face 'em. But, again, because of yer pride, you didn't want to believe you had a problem. You thought if you ignored it, it would disappear. So nothing got fixed." Laurie leaned into Jackie, whispering, "And do you wanna know what I think?"

For the first time, Jackie looked up, mumbling, "What?"

"I think you were happy to get fired. I think you hated that damn job. I think you took the first chance you got to come riding back into town, because deep down you knew you were in denial about something, but you just didn't know what. And subconsciously you wanted to fix it so you could get outta yer rut and back in the game. And you knew that if you had any chance at it, you would have to come home."

What Laurie had laid out to her, it all made sense.

The blond leaned back out, sighing, "But again you couldn't face it head on."

"Let me guess- my pride?"

"Nope. You're fear."

"Fear?"

Laurie nodded, "You were afraid of what you would find. So, you plunged head first into your own past, a happier time in your life. You tried swimming in it, and to an extent, with Donna 2, you even tried recreating it. But Jackie, I think it's time you wake up. You're 23 years old. You're still young. You're still hot, though not as much as me, but still. And you're not that stupid. You have a future. So stop trying to copy Donna's, 'cause frankly, I think her life is actually worse off than yours."

Jackie raised an interested eyebrow, "How so?"

Shrugging, Laurie snickered, "I bet she's living on a houseboat with her dad somewhere in Florida, struggling to pay for college as she works some dead-end job. She's all embarrassed to show her face here, especially since she told everyone she was gonna conquer the world. Meanwhile, little brother is probably still in Africa, hiding, afraid to come home, thinking Donna is here and ready to kick his ass. So they're both trying to avoid each other, and ended up avoiding everyone else in the process."

Jackie hated to admit it, but what Laurie said made sense- yet again. She was about to ask Kelso and Fez their opinion, only to find both boys peering out the window to the parking lot below. Kelso said, "Um, yeahhhhh, there's a problem with that part of the story, Laurie."

"What part?" Laurie snapped, sipping her beer.

Kelso clarified, "The part about Donna."

Fez, his eyes also staring out the window agreed, "Yes."

Laurie was baffled, "How could there be a problem?"

Jackie stood up, making her way to window. She shoved both boys out of the way, only for them and Laurie to all look around her to get a good view of the parking lot.

Her eyes nearly popped out of her head. Down below, someone was ransacking her powder blue mustang, they're blue jeaned legs kicking out from the driver's side door that was clawed open. Jackie screamed and hit both Kelso and Fez's shoulders before she ran downstairs, "Someone is breaking into my- and you two are just here- staring and- UGH!" Then, the person who broke into Jackie's car tumbled out.

It was a woman, with broad shoulders, an hourglass figure and blond hair.

Both Fez and Kelso turned to a shocked Laurie, "See the problem?"

Laurie sucked in her breath, "It can't be her."

Fez responded, "But it is."

Meanwhile, Jackie rushed past Fenton's front desk, barking as she saw him jotting down some story, "Some watchdog you are!"

He blinked, "Watchdog? Was that an insult?"

Jackie didn't think as she tore into the parking lot, shouting at the woman by her car, "Hey! You! Back away from my car!"

She ran as fast as she could, and then she made eye contact with the woman. The woman stared back at her, expressionless. Jackie felt her knees suddenly buckle as the blood drained from her face. There, not more than a few meters from her, vandalizing her mustang, was none other than-

"Donna?" Jackie gulped.

* * *

><p><em>The line "Hey! You! Back away from my car" was a reference to the Rolling Stone's song, "Get off of my Cloud."<em>


	13. Tate and Dave

This chapter will have some religious themes in it. There is no intent to offend anyone. There is also some cursing.

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><p><strong>CH.13 Tate &amp; Dave <strong>

She ran as fast as she could, and then she made eye contact with the woman. The woman stared back at her, expressionless. Jackie felt her knees suddenly buckle as the blood drained from her face. There, not more than a few meters from her, vandalizing her mustang, was none other than-

"Donna?" Jackie gulped.

The woman instantly dropped her hanger, running away from the vehicle like a frightened rabbit. Jackie cocked her head to the side- dumbstruck.

Did Donna just run away from her?

At that moment, she turned to her vehicle and noticed how trashed it was. Before she could even blink, Kelso ran up to her, panting, "Why'd Donna trash yer car?!"

"I…I don't know."

Then Fez made it over to them, also panting, "Jackie! Why did Donna break into your vehicle?!"

"I-I don't know!"

Finally Laurie, a golf club in one hand, raced over to the three other people, asking Jackie, "Hey, why the hell did big, blond and broad shouldered fuck up yer Mustang?"

Frustrated by the line of questioning which she held very little answers, Jackie screamed at the three of them, "I DON'T KNOW!"

The three stared at her quietly before she ran a hand through her dark hair, saying to herself, "She ran away from me…"

Fez piped in, ever the optimist, "Maybe it wasn't Donna! We saw her from far away, and you…well, let us face it Jackie, you drank two beers and you went to pieces faster than Legos."

Jackie looked up at them blankly, saying softly, "She ran away."

Kelso shrugged, "So?"

Laurie narrowed her eyes, thinking, "Now why the hell would Donna run away?"

Kelso shrugged again, "Maybe she's hiding something."

Fez sucked in his breath, looking at Jackie sadly, "Oh no…"

The other three leaned forward, Jackie asking, "What, What?!"

Fez shook his head, "I cannot say…it is all bad news!"

Jackie yanked the golf club out of Laurie's hands, waving it at Fez, growling, "What?!"

Fez looked down, obviously troubled, "…I heard that Donna was seeing Hyde." He quickly looked up, "But I did not believe a word! Well, until now… after you said Donna ran away from you….probably because she knows you will be mad that she is dating your ex."

Jackie snapped, "That damn rumor again?! Who told you that?"

"….Fenton."

Both Kelso and Jackie groaned, "Figures."

Ignoring Fez, Jackie swung the golf club over her shoulder, kicked one of her own pink cozies that was just lying on the pavement, and climbed inside her car. She tried to start it, thinking that maybe there was a possibility that she could follow Donna in the car. That was until the car wouldn't start. Laurie noticed it and popped open the hood.

Jackie clambered out, asking the blond, "What's wrong?"

Laurie smirked, holding a few cables in her hand, "She cut off your alternator. This car aint going anywhere for days."

And that was the moment Jackie snapped. The whole day, in her opinion, was one long, slow guilt-trip down memory lane and she was finally tired of feeling guilty. She twirled the golf club between her fingers before throwing it on the ground with an angry force.

"_I_…." she breathed out dangerously slow, "_have had it_!" She then pointed to the direction she felt, in her heart of hearts and in the center of her gut where Donna had taken off to, "I'm going after her." She then picked up the gold club again, this time roughly, "I'm going to straighten things out and find out the truth." She then looked Laurie in the eye, "And then I'm taking my life back."

And before anyone could blink, Jackie took off like a rocket. Kelso, his chest swelling in excitement jumped, "Wait! Are you gonna beat up, Donna?! I wanna see!" He ran after her. Next was Fez, shrugging at his girlfriend/ex-wife, telling her, "A boy's gotta do what a boy's gotta do!" Finally was Laurie, throwing up her arms in defeat, "Son-offa-bitch! Hold up, guys!"

Anyone who happened to drive by would have seen an angry, red faced brunette swinging a golf club, followed by what looked like an overgrown teenager with his tongue sticking out, who was followed by a skipping foreigner, who in turn was followed by a panting blond who seemed to be shouting for them to slow down.

Jackie's wild eyes scanned the street for any sign of the woman who was supposed to be her friend but turned out to be a traitor. Then, out of the corner of her eye, she caught a black converse shoe going into an alley. "Gotcha." She mumbled, speeding up, not caring if the rest were following or not. Luckily, they were, though Laurie looked like she'd seen better days.

The ex-cheerleader trampled down the alley in time to see a pair of converse shoes sticking up at the end of a fence. Without thinking, she followed them, climbing up the wooden fence and cursing when a couple of splinters pinched themselves in her skin. Behind her, she heard Fez scream, "Fences?! I am terrible at climbing those!" Then there was Kelso's voice, "I'm great at climbing those!" Then there was a tired, rasping voice she assumed belonged to Laurie, "We're jumping over fences now?! What the fuck?! Are we in the Olympics?!"

Jackie just made it over the fence when she saw a broad shouldered, blond woman jump on a family-sized trampoline and into the neighboring lot. Immediately Jackie did the same. Kelso was beyond excited as he made it over the fence, telling his friends behind him, "Jackie just jumped into the next lot via trampoline! Awesome!" Fez panted behind him, trying to make his way up the fence with Laurie pushing him up, "Tr-Tram-Trampoline?!" Laurie rolled her eyes, "Great! Now we're fucking ninjas!"

Meanwhile, in the neighboring lot, the blond woman dived head first into an elongated swimming pool that seemed to encompass the whole backyard of this home. Jackie did the same, diving in after her. The two swam toward the other end of the pool, the broad shouldered woman just out of Jackie's reach.

In the other yard, Kelso explained to his friends, "Now we just do like Donna and Jackie, and jump into the next lot!"

Laurie raised her eyebrow, unconvinced, "You want us to what now?"

Kelso explained yet again to which Laurie nodded sarcastically, "Oh yeah, I don't see myself cracking my neck or anything!" But before Laurie could convince them it was a bad idea, Fez had jumped onto the trampoline, screaming at the top of his lungs, "BANZAI!" Kelso ran after him, smiling like a madman, "That's the spirit!" Laurie rolled her eyes, chasing after Kelso, "I am so ending up in the hospital for this!" She then jumped on the trampoline, screaming, "BANZAI!"

As she was in the air, everything suddenly became super slow. With an unexplainable fright, she saw the fence above her head, and suddenly the world was upside down. Laurie then closed her eyes, screaming, convinced this was the end. And then she felt something around her, holding her tightly. She thought it was certain death until she opened her eyes and saw her boyfriend/ ex-husband holding her securely in his arms. He smiled down at her, his brown eyes twinkling, "You rang, baby?"

She couldn't help the smile on her face as she said joyfully, "Fez! You asshole!" And she couldn't help it when she planted a rough kiss on his lips. He told her, his tone light, "You know the drill, baby! You fall, I catch you. Now, if I fall, you might wanna move outta the way…I could squash you. But, you can help me recover while I'm on the mend!" Before she could respond with a smart ass remark, Kelso snapped at them, "Hey! Love-birds! They're already halfway down the street! Let's go!"

Laurie quickly kissed Fez again as he placed her back on the ground. Hand in hand, the couple ran, following Kelso, who seemed to be headed for the church.

Jackie sprinted up the steps of Point Place Presbyterian Church, before slamming the oak doable doors open, snarling, "Okay! Times up! Come out Donna, and face me like a woman!"

The candles in the front of the aisle flickered, everything eerily quiet. Jackie eyed the podium for a second before looking down the wooden pews. All seemed to be empty. She finally shouted, "I know you're in here!"

The statues of several biblical figures stared down at her judgingly from their respective places in the walls. It almost seemed as though she disturbed their sleep.

She lowered the golf club, her heart starting to slow as she saw the giant cross at the end of the altar, staring down at her with all its silent power. For a moment, all she did was stare at it, acknowledging that when she was younger, religion was such an active part of her life. She went to every Sunday service, helped out in every bake sale, and had a hand with every church play. At Christmas-time she and her fellow cheerleaders would try to help the less fortunate, and even though she claimed she only did it for school, a part of her felt fulfilled in helping others.

But that stopped.

When her father was arrested, and her mother left, she turned more to the church than ever. But when she felt her prayers and hopes fell upon deaf ears, she finally accepted that her then-boyfriend, Steven Hyde was right. Religion was just a waste of time.

"Jackie Burkhart? I have not seen you for quite the while!" A happy voice rang, echoing in the chambers of the empty church.

Jackie slowly turned around, seeing a man in white robes, his black hair neatly timed.

"Pasture Dave." She said hollowly. She liked Dave, and was surprisingly relieved to see him and not the ghost of Christmas Not-Yet-To-Come, but at the same time she felt a pang of guilt. She hadn't stepped foot in a church for years. She spent her Sundays lying in bed, getting high as she played her old ABBA records. And she used her pocket bible as a coaster for beer. She wasn't the good little girl he remembered her to be.

He was about to say something about how beautiful she blossomed to be when she dropped the golf club, tears spilling out of her eyes. He was immediately alarmed. Her one sentence was, "I need to see Donna."

"Well, she's not here my child."

"I-I saw her-", she blubbered out, trying to wipe away the tears as quickly as they formed.

He sighed, stepping closer to her and placing a warm arm around her shoulders, "Sometimes Jackie, people see what they want to see. They see what they need to see, to help them to the next step in their lives."

She looked up at him, "I wasn't imagining her!"

As he nodded, bright sun rays fell upon the inside of the church, illuminating it and letting it appear much friendlier. He then whispered, "I know."

At that moment, Donna stepped forward from the shadows at the front of the altar. But something was different about her, and Jackie couldn't place it. Then she sucked in her breath, creating this ghastly snorting noise until she reached in her sweater pocket and pulled out red, bottle-coke glasses.

Jackie's heart broke as she realized who she was really staring at. "Rhonda Tate…" she breathed, "Big Rhonda."

Dave gave Jackie a tight squeeze on her shoulder before saying, "I'll leave you two alone. I have a Christian rock band coming over, and I want to show them that I too can play the guitar and be cool!" As he trotted off, Jackie asked Rhonda, "How…you lost weight."

"Jane Fonda," was her simple reply.

"Why?"

Rhonda shrugged pathetically, leaning against the podium, "I…um, I realized something a few years back." Jackie waited patiently as Rhonda continued slowly, "I don't know what I'm doing in life." Tracing the edge of the podium, Rhonda looked almost close to tears as she explained that her parents bounced from state to state, and all people saw when they looked at her was a fat girl. The only person who didn't, and loved her for who she was, was Fez. Rhonda explained that she lost weight with the goal of coming back to Point Place and to confess her love to Fez, but when she did come back, she had realized Fez had moved on- with Laurie. Then she learned that he had been with Nina and Jackie. She had felt like a fool, coming all this way back for someone who didn't love her anymore. But she couldn't stop herself from following him, and sometimes Laurie.

And then it clicked for Jackie, "Little Jackie saw you at the Forman's breakfast this morning. She mistook you for Donna. And you were there because Fez and Laurie were there."

"They just…seemed so happy."

"Why did you ransack my car?"

Rhonda shrugged, embarrassed, "…send me the bill. I live in Green Bay now. I work at yoga studio called '_Bendz_.' There's only one. You can find it in the phone book. But yeah, I messed up your car, it's just that…I wanted to see if you really were with Fez. Everyone was telling me you were, but there's so many rumors that fly around town, you just can't be sure. I had to be. So, I thought that maybe there was some evidence in your car…I don't know." She shook her head, also admitting, "And I guess…I was jealous."

"Jealous?"

"Of you." Rhonda softly said, "You have looks that melt men's hearts, and you grew up with money and look at you! You had that photographing gig and everyone in town is talking about it…you've accomplished so much and I haven't done a damn thing!"

Jackie shook her head, "No Rhonda, that's all wrong! I haven't-"

Rhonda waved her hand, stopping her. She then said, "Save it. I know you're just trying to make me feel better, but I don't deserve it. All I ask, is that you don't tell Fez. I mean, he's so happy with Eric's sister, and I wouldn't want to ruin that."

Jackie nodded.

At that moment, Kelso stumbled in, Fez and Laurie holding hands right behind him. Kelso looked up, his smile falling, "Where's Donna? Did you beat 'er up yet?"

Jackie turned back to the spot Rhonda was at, noticing it was now empty. She then looked at the gold club on the ground. She shrugged, "It doesn't matter."

She motioned for the gang to turn around and prepare to go back to Fez and Laurie's apartment where she was going to explain she was only hallucinating. But just as she almost went out the oak doors, she heard a voice, Rhonda's, ring out in the chapel, "I think you should check on that little girl who was tagging along with you."

Jackie spun around, the room appeared empty. She called out to it, "Why?"

There was nothing, and then Rhonda's voice said slowly, a bit of warning in it, "I think you should you know…I wasn't the only one following Fez."

Jackie's eyes widened.

"I caught another woman…_stalking_ him. She went through his garbage, made a spare key for his apartment, and even stole some of his clothes."

Jackie's heart began to race.

"She held her breath a lot, until she turned purple. She seemed like a real nut case, so I kept my distance from her…but I saw her eyes when she saw the girl that was with you. It was like she recognized her or something."

And then Jackie remembered a vague memory of Colette admitting that some psychotic named Caroline became her 'big sister', after Jackie 'abandoned' her at the police station.

"Oh no…" Jackie whispered, realizing that she may have unintentionally put Colette in harm's way as Rhonda finished, "…I think she stopped stalking Fez, and started on someone else."

"No."

"…It may be the girl."

"_No!"_ Jackie screamed, panicking as she yanked open the double doors of the church. She had to find Little Jackie before Caroline did something to her.


	14. Crazy Caroline

_Chapter contains some adult language and themes._

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><p><strong>CH.14 Crazy Caroline <strong>

Colette was in her small room, trying to use a glue stick to hold together her peeling brownish wallpaper. She hated that wall paper. It used to be pink with several yellow and blue elephants, and when she was younger she adored it, but now that she was older it was just another thing her many brothers teased her about.

Her small clock radio was blasting the newest _Tears For Fears_ song. She just wanted to drown out the angry shouts between her oldest brother and his girlfriend. But still, she managed to catch a few sentences from it, and gathered that her brother's girlfriend was pregnant, but her brother didn't feel he was the father and wanted to break up with her anyway.

Colette sighed, her hands pressed against the wallpaper, smoothing it out.

She didn't mind the thought of being an aunt. Living with so many boys, she actually found the thought of possibly having a niece as being endearing. She could see herself playing with her during bath time, lightly pushing her in her little swing set, maybe even teaching her how to ride a bike…

"Crap." Colette muttered, "I left my bike at the Formans…" She then convinced herself that she would go back later on and get it. She'd retrieve it when Jackie was away. "Yeah, and I won't be anything like her. I'll be cool, and I won't try to turn my niece into me…I'll be a way better role model."

Colette gave a smirk at the last thought, so lost in her own thoughts she didn't hear her other brother accuse the pregnant girlfriend of being a whore. She also didn't notice it when the wallpaper unpeeled itself from her wall.

"Wow, I could have a niece…I wonder what her name would be." Colette mused, popping the glue stick top back on, crunching a roach as she stepped back. She hated living like this. She always cleaned up the small space her mother gave her, but there always seemed to be a roach or a spider lurking around. She blamed her brothers.

And then she heard a loud bang at her door which jolted her senses. Her oldest brother came in, a cigarette in one hand and a beer can in the other. He clicked off her radio, telling her sharply, "Runt, can't you hear me calling for you?"

Colette rolled her eyes, "Uh, not really. I heard you talking to your baby momma-"

"That bitch is a slut. And as far as I'm concerned, that kid aint even mine! So I don't give two shits what happens to it, but anyway-" He took a swig of his beer, before burping, "Some chick is at the front, waiting for you. She says you're in trouble, says someone is following you."

Colette sat down on her bed, the rusted springs crunching underneath her weight. Colette raised an eyebrow, "Following me? Who would be following me?"

Her brother shrugged, leaning against the doorframe, "Don't know, Runt."

"Who's the woman that's telling you this?"

He shrugged again, gulping down the last of his beer, "A hot chick."

"Oh yeah, that narrows it down." Colette replied sarcastically.

"Janice or something." He yawned, crunching his beer in his hand before tossing it at Colette's head. It lightly tapped her head before falling to her feet. Grumbling, Colette stood up, tossing the can away in her little trash bin, "You mean, 'Jackie'?"

He scratched his head, "Sure, whatever."

Colette walked out of her room, feeling weird as she passed her brother's girlfriend who was crying in the kitchen, "Uh…where is Jackie?"

Her brother, who had been following her, pointed at the front screen door, "Out there, waiting for you on the porch." He then turned to his girlfriend, snarling, "What the fuck are you still doing here?!" He tossed her a few dollars, telling her over his shoulder, "There. That's my alimony for the next 18 years. Now get the hell outta my house."

Colette made a mental note to herself that if she ever made enough money, to send some of it to what looked like her brother's ex-girlfriend and her child. When she opened the screen door, a loud creak was heard. She stepped out onto the empty porch, confused, "Um, Jackie?"

The door slammed shut behind her as she heard both of her older brothers begin to fight over who got to play _Pong_ first as the girlfriends sobs were heard.

"Jackie?" She tried again, "This isn't funny."

She heard a muffled voice from around the corner of her house, "_Over here_."

Colette stepped down the front steps, getting upset, "Why are you playing hide and seek? What's going on?!"

Colette heard a giggle as she rounded the corner of the house, saying loudly, "For the record, I'm still mad at you! Trying to make me into a copy of you isn't fair to me! So, if you came to apologize-" No one was there.

She heard the same giggle, this time away from her house and toward the shed that was in the back of her home. It was a rundown, rusted shed, one that they never used. Still, Colette hesitated before she called out, "Jackie?"

She heard the same muffled voice, coming from the shed, "_Over here_."

Something was wrong. Colette felt it in the pit of her stomach. With her feet rooted to the spot, she shook her head, her voice cracking, "Why are you over there?"

There was no reply.

Despite herself, Colette took a step forward, her eyes glued to the shed, waiting for any sign of trouble, "You told my brother someone was following me."

No reply.

Colette forced herself to ask, "Who's following me?"

She heard the muffled voice, but this time it came from behind her, "_I am_…"

Colette spun around just in time to catch the fleeting glimpse of a shovel popping the side of her face. It was the last thing the teenager saw as she collapsed onto the ground, unconscious. Standing over her was a thin, petite, blond woman with wild eyes and a deranged smile. She planted the head of the shovel into the ground, giggling, "_…Little Caroline_."

(((())))

"Jackie, will you calm down!"

The former cheerleader swung around, snapping at Kelso, "No! I can't calm down! Little Jackie is in trouble!"

Laurie yawned, "Twerps probably fine."

In front of the church, stood four individuals, all in their twenties. While three seemed perfectly calm, the youngest member looked as though she were hyperventilating, "I need to get to Little Jackie!"

At that moment, a teenager in a blue bike rode over, seemingly recognizing Jackie. He wiggled his eyebrows at her, "Hello, beautiful!"

Laurie made a disgusted face, "Jackie, why is Alfalfa making googly eyes at you?"

Fez nodded, "Being creepy is _my_ job!"

Jackie turned around, forcing herself to recognize the boy as Harold, the teenager that Little Jackie tried asking out at the mall who really wanted to go out with her instead of Little Jackie. Before he could string two words together, Jackie ran over to the pimply faced teenager, practically demanding, "I need your bike!"

"Uh, why?"

"My car is five blocks away- tanked, and I need fast transportation!"

He leaned in, smiling at her and revealing his mouthful of metal, "Okay, I'll let you ride my handle bars for a kiss."

Jackie quickly made a face, "Pucker up!" Harold leaned in, eyes drooping closed and his chapped teenage lips puckering out. Everyone's eyes widened, Fez remarking, "Damn, Jackie has really fallen from grace." But then, seemingly out of nowhere, the brunette's fingers curled to a fist that rocketed straight across young Harold's face.

He never saw it coming.

As he toppled to the ground, Jackie dragged the blue bicycle from under him, setting it right side up and hopping on, instructing her friends, "I'll be in Steven's old neighborhood! I just- I just have to check on her!"

As she rode away, the gang looked over at a knocked out Harold before Fez smiled, "Well would you look at that! Stealing bicycles, breaking boy's hearts as well as their jaws, sputtering strange lines of nonsense… Jackie Burkhart is back!"

((()))

When Colette awoke, she winced at the terrible throbbing on her head. "Uughh…"

The lights were so bright, they made her head feel dizzy. She blinked a few times, trying to make sense of her last memory, but all she could think about was her shed. She then felt something wet sliding down the side of her face, and when the drops landed on her chest, she deduced it was blood.

Then she heard a sadistic giggle, "Wakey, wakey…"

Colette let out a low groan, suddenly feeling a burning on her wrists. For some reason her hands were above her head. She looked up, her eyes blinded by the light momentarily before noticing that someone had tied her wrists to a meat hook.

"What the-"

She tried to stand, but could only feel the tips of her toes skim the floor. Which then had her wondering something: Where were her shoes? She looked down, realizing someone had taken her clothing and redressed her in a white and blue checkered dress, something that resembled Dorothy from the _Wizard of Oz_.

Then a sharp cackle split the air, "_I'll get you, my pretty_!" Colette tried to turn around, but couldn't. Her toes fruitlessly tried to move her, but in the end it wasn't necessary. The source of the cackle, a petite blond with a grim two sizes too big skipped around her, until they were face to face and a shovel behind her back. Colette's eyes widened as she recognized the woman.

But the blond merely finished her sentence, "_And you're little bitch too_!" She then waved the shovel in front of Colette tauntingly, "By the way, the bitch is Jackie."

"Caroline…" Colette gargled, "Yer…crazy."

At that the woman shrugged, "My old high school nickname, 'Crazy Caroline'! Gah, I hated high school, they made me out to be cuckoo for_ Cocoa Puffs_!"

"You are nuts."

"Oh yeah, _grrreeeeaaaatt_ idea, _Little Caroline_. Bite the hand that has the shovel in it!" Caroline replied sarcastically, tossing the shovel casually from one hand to another.

"I'm not Little Caroline." Colette muttered.

"So yeah, I suppose yer _Lil Jackie_ now, huh?"

"**No**!" Colette snapped, a spurt of energy briefly burst to life in her tired body as she snarled, "My name is Colette!"

For a moment, Caroline herself seemed touched. Then she seemed amused. And then she seemed devilish. She leaned in close to Colette, whispering in her ear, "It hurts, doesn't it. By the end of the day, no one will remember your name… _Little Caroline_."

Colette's body shook violently, wanting to hurl herself at Caroline.

The blond skipped away, "It's almost as if you have no name at all… _Little Caroline_."

Colette snarled, "What the hell did you do to my clothes and why do I look like Judy Garland?!"

At that, Caroline dragged a foldable chair from the far wall of whatever warehouse they were in, a loud scratching noise penetrating the air. She then unfolded it directly in front of Colette, and calmly sat down, laying the shovel on her lap.

"Why not, _Little Caroline_? _The Wizard of Oz_ is, after all, a story of a girl who is just trying to find her place in the world, seeing as how the one she lives in is too black and white for her taste."

"The entire movie was a dream!" Colette choked, her head throbbing even more in her angered state.

"Wrong!" Caroline giggled, "It was a movie, based off a book!" As Colette groaned, Caroline mused loudly, "I almost went for an _Alice in Wonderland_ theme. I could've been the Mad Hatter… but I just ran out of time." Caroline giggled, "Time! Oh, I'm late, I'm late! Better not follow me down the rabbit hole!"

"You're insane."

"Wrong again!" Caroline giggled, this time jumping to her feet, twirling the shovel in her nimble fingers as if it her a baton, "I'm just, well, hypersensitive to the normality of what you have accepted as everyday occurrence aka life!"

"What does that even mean?"

"You call me insane…" Caroline smiled greedily, pressing her face to Colette's, looking deeply into her eyes as she spoke softly, "But isn't it more insane to live in a roach infested flee bin with a bunch of misogynistic males who are pampered by their overworked mother and who disown their own children? Is it not insane to think you could ever escape a life destined for servitude? Is it not insane to believe that the woman who abandoned you as a child, Jackie, had changed? She didn't. Look around, Little Caroline. She left you…with me…_again_."

Colette looked down, pathetically looking ashamed of herself as Caroline rubbed the wound some more, "What did you think was going to happen? Did you honestly think she would save you?" Caroline leaned back out, giggling, "That train wreck can't even save herself."

((()))

The sun was beginning to dip behind the hills that surrounded Point Place, Wisconsin. But, Jackie ignored the late hour, using all her energy to peddle Harold's flimsy bike toward Little Jackie's house.

When she did make it, she practically jumped off the bike, her chest pounding with adrenaline mingling paranoia. With her trembling legs, she ran up to the screen door, pounding on it hysterically, replaying Big Rhonda's words to her. _"…but I saw her eyes when she saw the girl that was with you. It was like she recognized her or something. I think she stopped stalking Fez, and started on someone else. It may be the girl."_

"No…" Jackie mumbled desperately under her breath. If anything happened to Little Jackie, she would never forgive herself. Her fists were red with her pounding on the door, which only intensified by the minute.

The door opened slightly, revealing a shaggy haired young man with a stubble reminiscent to Steven Hyde's. He wore a loose T-shirt, and a pair of striped boxer shorts. He took one look at Jackie before saying flatly, "You're lost."

That took Jackie by surprise, "Lost?"

He leaned against the doorframe, and it was then when Jackie noticed the soft sniffles and gentle whispering coming from behind him. Perhaps they were coming from another room?

He must've noticed the way her eyes glazed past him because he explained, "My stupid brother got his chick knocked up."

Thinking of both Hyde and Betsy for some reason, Jackie felt compelled to ask, "…Are they keeping it?"

"He didn't want to at first…but now they're thinking about it." He then stood up tall, looking down at Jackie, "Now what is it? Yer car stalled farther up the road or something?"

"I'm looking for Little Jackie-"

He raised an eyebrow, "Little who?"

"Uh…I'm looking for a girl, uh, about-" Jackie held up her hand slightly above her own head, "-Yay high, and uh," she pointed at her face, "She has freckles and like, reddish-brownish autumn hair…bright eyes…she dresses like a tomboy," But then Jackie remembered Donna, and figured that Little Jackie didn't dress too much like her, so she tried to correct herself, "well, sorta, I-I mean that she dresses a little more feminine than a tomboy, though not by much…and she likes something called Madonna, and she's very feisty…"

"What's 'er name?"

"Uh…I…Uh," Jackie looked down, feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt that she couldn't remember Little Jackie's real name, especially since Little Jackie shouted it almost half the time they were together.

Before Jackie could confess that she didn't know, the guy sighed and told her flatly, "Look, it sounds like you described my sister- The Runt."

Jackie looked up, eyes brightening, "_Yes_! Her!"

He nodded, "Yeah, some lady came by looking for her too."

Hearing this, Jackie's smile fell off her face. He didn't notice, and continued, "Some blond. Called herself Janice or Jeanie or something."

"_Jackie_?!" Her eyes widened in horror, realizing that Little Jackie was probably tricked somehow by Caroline pretending to be her.

"Yup."

"Where did they go?!" Jackie asked urgently, suddenly jumping up and down frantically. He shrugged, rolling his eyes, "Look, I'm not my sister's keeper. I don't do that. I don't look after her, I don't look after mom, and I don't look after my moron brothers. So, if you wanna find 'em, call the freakin' cops." At that, he turned on his heel and left.

Jackie wasted no time in hopping on Harold's bicycle to peddle back into town and do just that- tell the police everything she knew about Little Jackie.

The sky was a peachy orange, the day already melting into night by the time Jackie made it to the station. She was out of breath, and panting profusely, but she felt she owed it to both Little Jackie and herself.

With all the strength she could muster, and upset that all those months at the gym in Kenosha were wasted on yoga instead cardio building, Jackie staggered up the steps of the police station. She reached the front desk, gasping out, "Water!"

The police woman at the front desk merely rolled her eyes at her and continued speaking on the phone, "Yes sir…cat in a tree? We'll contact the fire department. Uh-huh…the cat's name is Tom? Only answers to his own name and not pet sounds?"

Jackie glared at her, panting, "Water!"

The woman said kindly, "One moment sir," she then turned to Jackie, snapping, "Get the damn water yourself!" She then pointed at a water fountain on the far side of the hall, adding, "Can't you see I'm busy here with a real emergency?"

Jackie looked down, her mouth parched so much that she would swear her saliva was turning to sand inside her very mouth. She mumbled, "Lit-tle…J-Jack-ie…"

The woman shot Jackie one last glare and returned to the phone call. Jackie hobbled over to the fountain and took a few quick gulps before hobbling back over to the desk, ignoring the burning in her chest due to her heavy breathing during her bike trek. She waved a hand in front of the police woman, saying in a raspy voice, "I need…I need assistance!"

"Ma'am," the woman snapped, covering the phone bottom with one hand as the pointed at Jackie with the other, "Please wait your turn and take a seat!"

"But-But Little Jackie! It's an emergency!-"

"This is a police station. There's emergencies here all the damn time." The woman then continued speaking the gentleman on the other line. With an unbelievable itching in her gut, Jackie slammed her fists on the counter, snarling, "Listen up, Deputy Fife! My friend is in trouble and I need someone to listen to me!"

At that the police woman raised her hand, signaling a male officer, "We have a disturbance here!"

Jackie told the other officer, "I'm not the disturbed one, she is! My friend has been kidnapped-"

The officer walked over, strutting over as if he was the most important man in the room, "Really? Did her next of kin file a police report?"

"Well, no-"

"Was she taken against her will?"

"I-I don't know exactly, I wasn't there…but I think she was-"

"Is she a minor?"

"Yes! Well, I think so…she's in High School!"

The officer stared at her for a moment before asking her gently, "Ma'am, perhaps you need to rest-"

Jackie stomped her foot, her cheeks reddening in anger, "NO! I did not peddle a stupid bike over fifty miles around Point Place so I could take a nap in the police station! I'm here to save Little Jackie!"

"Little who?"

"Jackie!"

He nodded sympathetically to her, him and the police woman exchanging looks, "You're friend is Little Jackie?" When Jackie he nodded, he bent his head a little, asking her as if she were a toddler to the point that he even used a baby voice, "Is Little Jackie you're imaginary friend?"

Jackie flipped out, shoving him as hard as she could- though he barely moved an inch. She shouted, "I'm not senile!"

"Ma'am, you said you peddled over fifty miles in this hot sun-"

But Jackie interrupted him, shoving him again, "For Little Jackie!"

The police woman ended her phone call, and had walked over to Jackie, asking her seriously, "Does this 'Little Jackie' have a name?"

"I-I, uh, uhgh!" Jackie fumed, unable to recollect Little Jackie's true name. The male officer talked to her again as if she were a toddler, "Now now sweetheart, just lay down…I'll get you a glass of nice, warm milk, and I'll call your daddy to pick you up, okay?"

Never before had the urge to kill someone with her bare hands had been so prominent in Jackie Burkhart.

Unable to stop the boiling ball of anger building in her stomach, Jackie screamed, "Will someone listen to me?!"

At that the police woman grabbed Jackie's arm, twisting her to the ground, telling the male officer, "Looks like we got another crazy one!"

Hearing this, Jackie screamed, "I'M NOT CRAZY! CAROLINE IS CRAZY! BUT I'M NOT!"

Another female officer soon came to the first one's aid as they wrestled a screaming Jackie from escaping their clutches.

((()))

Colette looked down, pathetically looking ashamed of herself as Caroline rubbed the wound some more, "What did you think was going to happen? Did you honestly think she would save you?" Caroline leaned back out, giggling, "That train wreck can't even save herself."

Colette then mumbled, "When did you get out?"

"Of the state mental institution?" Caroline giggled, "Never did- officially! I escaped awhile back… y'know, I had this crazy notion that I should come back to Point Place, and that me and Fez would be happy together!" Out of nowhere, Caroline suddenly turned angry and hurled the shovel toward a window. It shattered it, glass pouring everywhere as Caroline giggled suddenly, her eyes teeming with madness, "But then I saw him married to that skank, Laurie Forman! But then…" Caroline suddenly quieted down, slowly walking toward a chained Colette. She reached out, and with the back of her hand, slowly rubbed Colette's cheek. While Colette winced, Caroline smiled, "But then I remembered you. You were the only one who ever looked up to me."

Colette didn't want to admit it, but even as a child she thought Caroline was nuts and she did her best to escape her clutches. Still, the teenager thought it best not to let out the truth right then and there- no telling how Caroline would take it, especially since she apparently enjoyed throwing shovel around.

Caroline's face then contorted in anger, "But then Jackie took you away! Just like she took away Fez! Just like she takes everything away!" Colette yelped when Caroline suddenly smacked her across the face, seething with anger, "_And you looked up to her! __**You little traitor**_!"

Trying to calm down Caroline, Colette blurted, "I had too!"

What the teen said seemed to intrigue Caroline. She lowered her hand, raising an eyebrow, "What do you mean 'had too'?"

Colette fumbled over her words, "She, she made me…she was sad and stuff…her life isn't what she thought it would be…everyone's gone!"

Caroline rolled her eyes, "The only ones gone are Eric and Donna."

"Yes!" Colette nodded, the tips of her toes barely scarping the floor, "They were friends, but now they're gone-"

Caroline shook her head, tapping her chin with a finger, "No they aren't."

"…what?"

Caroline smirked, as if she were the most superior being in the universe, "I know exactly where they are."

Colette couldn't help her interest, "Where?"

Caroline pointed at her temple, "In here."

"…what?"

Caroline clarified, "They're in my head! Everyone's in my head! Fez is in my head, you're in my head, I'm even in my own head." She then giggled, "The whole universe is in my head! I control it! I'm the only real person who exists, and everyone else is just figments of my imagination! So whatever I do doesn't matter, because I control everything! And when I get punished, it's me punishing myself- get it?!" She then laughed hysterically before turning on her heel and whistling the theme song to _The Wizard of Oz_.

Blinking, Colette mumbled under her breath, "She really is Crazy Caroline…"

On the far end of the warehouse, Caroline skipped around, talking to people who weren't there, "Will you come with me? For," She suddenly burst into song, _"-we should be off to see the Wizard! The Wonderful Wizard of Oz!" _

* * *

><p><em>I do not own The Wizard of Oz or Alice in Wonderland. <em>


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That '70s Show