Harry Potter 1. Chapter 1

_**RANDOM COEPTUS DRABBLES**_

by Goddess of Grammar

_A fanfiction of a fanfiction... a mini spin off of Coeptus de Cerno de Albeo et Caligo by taylor-leighyoung._

**Disclaimer: **J.K. Rowling owns Hogwarts and all other Harry Potter related thingy-me-bobs. Alex, Mia, Tia and Liz are owned by taylor-leighyoung (unless they say otherwise) and can be found in their story Coeptus de Cerno de Albeo et Caligo. I've decided that I own Amy and taylor'd better agree to that.

These are a few drabble that have been going around my head. I was originally going to post them when Coeptus is done, but at the rate taylor is going (despite my nagging) they'd never be online. So, some are related to bits we've discussed about alternate versions of the story (of which there have been hundreds...) but if you have a good idea of the characters' personalities, they should make sense. Read and review both this and Coeptus please! (Things will be posted on here intermittently - when I feel like it. The more reviews I get, the more I feel like updating. HINT, HINT.)

However, please do remember that this is_ not supposed_ to be a complete story, and the bits are _supposed to be _totally unrelated.

* * *

A Brief Interlude

Five people were crowded around a long roll of parchment. One sat back in disgust.

"Whose bright idea was this anyway?" Tia asked sulkily. " 'Let's lock ourselves in a room with a magic resistant door and reinforced walls unti we finish the chronicles of our years at Hogwarts.' O _excellent_ idea, whoever it was."

The others moved away from the parchment and turned to look at her.

"As I recall, Tia," said Liz, with a smirk befitting Alex, "It was yours."

"Hmph."

"Can we please got on with the story! We've been here for 5 hours and we've only got to the middle of first year." Amy was getting exasperated.

"Yeah," Mia agreed. "I have a date with William tonight, and I want to have time to get ready."

Tia forcibly agreed. "Yeah, we're gonna get dumped if we miss our dates!"

Amy, with faked sincerity replied: "Oh, don't worry Tia, if you're dumped, you could always date Alex here."

"EEEEEWWWWWW!" both Alex and Tia chorused, jumping about a foot in the air. Alex conjured up a bat and it began to hit Amy over the head, hard.

Lizzy, getting fed up, dismissed the bat with a wave of her wand. "Can we _please_ get on? I'd like to be done sometime before next Christmas."

"But it's January," Lucy pointed out.

"My point exactly."

With Tia and Alex still shooting glares at Amy, they crowded round the parchment again.

* * *

Pausing for Dinner  


"Dinner's ready!" an excruciatingly loud voice from the next room called.

"Could you have shouted any louder?" William asked, massaging his ears.

"Oh, Will darling, I'm so sorry." Mia was furious with Alex for potentially harming the ears of her adored husband. She turned to the kitchen with an irate look on her face. "Oi, blockhead, keep the noise down!"

A head appeared around the doorframe. "Mia, _dearest_, thankyou for defending me from that awful brute."

She scowled. That wasn't what she had meant, and he knew it. With a smirk, the head disappeared again.

Amy and Liz exchanged glances, both with identical expressions of amusement. Mia, however found nothing funny in the exchange. She turned to Tia who said condescendingly, "I don't blame you! If my Mikey-poo got hurt, I would be absolutely appalled!"

Although she herself had mocked Tia many times for her infatuation with her fiance, Mia decided that she would allow it on this one occasion, and she and Tia began a heated discussion on which of their various crushes during their Hogwarts years had been the hottest. William, who didn't particularly like that line of conversation, went to chat with Lucy, who was sitting in the window seat. Mia who was intent on her crush of second year, Henry Blewitt, ingnored him.

SLAM! The door bounced open, and a weary looking man limped in.

"Mikey-poo!" Tia began smothering him with kisses.

"Hello, Tia."

"Bad day, darling sweetums?"

"Terrible. Got anything to eat?"

At that moment, eight plates were levitated into the room. The cook followed them. His smirk changed to a frown when he saw who had arrived. "Woodhouse."

"Black."

The two had never gotten along particularly well. Michael had mistrusted Alex, until he found out that Alex was just _friends_ with the girls. Alex had been furious when he found this out, considering it an insult to his honour, and they had been at loggerheads with each other ever since . Tia was resigned to this by now.

Liz and Amy were already seated at the table when the food arrived. Amy put the massive Arithmancy book they had been poring over, on the floor. Liz decided to disperse the tension with a call to Alex to hurry up.

Mia emerging ftrom the kitchen with a large bowl of steming fried rice floating before her, called to her spouse and they took their places. Michael and Alex had not moved, despite Tia's incessant tugging of Michael's arm. Amy got fed up, walked over to them, and gave them both a sharp slap.

"Good God Amy, you didn't have to do that!" Alex said. Tia just glared, poked her as hard as she could in the ribs, earning a scowl in return. Her love dragged Tia to the table, before she could do any more harm on his behalf. Alex trudged to the table too and sat down in the only remaining place, which was unfortunately next to Michael.

"Right, maybe _now_ we can eat!" Amy retook her seat, and lifted her fork when Michael said "But what about Grace?"

Alex, seeing a chance to poke fun, said "Who's she?"

Tia burst into tears. "What? Are you seeing someone else? How could you Mikey-poo!"

Lucy, who was next to her, explained. "He means the prayer before a meal."

Mia stifled a grin. Liz winked at Amy and said, "I think that's a great idea. Would you mind leading, Michael, as none of us are particularly religious."

Amy caught on. "No, I think we should go the whole way. Everybody hold hands!"

Michael and Alex, seeing that everyone else had complied, reluctantly touched their index fingers to each other in disgust. Amy, who had the least self control when it came to laughter, was giggling madly all through Michael's speech, which was considerably shorter than it might have been, had he not been sitting where he was.

After grace was ended, the two fingers were disconnected with extreme haste, Alex exaggeratedly wiping the offending digit on his shirt.

"And _now_ can we eat?" asked Mia petulantly.

* * *

Well, what did you think? I can think of at least one person who'll want to kill me because I posted this...

Anyway, REVIEW PLEASE!


	2. Chapter 2

**Utterly random. Each verse should be sung to the tune of "Look at me, I'm Sandra Dee" from Grease. It was going round my head so I decided to post it just to make it stop. My little bit of silliness. **

* * *

Look at me,

I'm Amy Leigh,

Completely and only me,

I'm only me

Whoever you may be

I'm sensible Amy.

-

Listen here,

I'm Mia-dear.

Pretty and a charmer dear.

Long auburn hair

And a smile that I share,

I'm lovely Mia-dear.

-

Hey, you lot,

I'm Tia- not

Tea or Tin or Lancelot

Utterly mad,

But not quite so bad,

My name is Tia, not tea.

-

Hello there,

I'm 'Lizabeth

Saint-in-all-my-ways-abeth

Everything right

Don't stay up late at night,

My name is Lizzy Smith.


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor