Naruto 1. Façade

**.:M**_aster _**o**_f _**D**_isguise_**:.**

**b**_y: _**S**_tupefiedNarutard_

_**NOTES: **_Okay, okay, so-- I should be updating other fics right now... BUT I CAN'T. Do you guys know what writer's block is? I've been so depressed and stuff lately that my main story, _Stupefy,_is so hard to write at the moment, ya know? So I'll settle with a slightly more serious story that I know you guys will love! :DDD This story I will dedicate to **TearsOfFallenAngel**, for sticking with me and being such an inspiration! **NOW GO READ HER STORIES OR ILL EAT YOUR BRAIN OMNOMNOM.**

_**Summary**_: Naruto is the son of mob boss Arashi Uzumaki, thus preventing him from leading a normal life. Disguising himself in school is one thing, but living life as the real Naruto is sometimes worse. After befriending a member of an enemy clan, how can his façade in both realities stay together? YAOI, ItaNaru, OroAra, onesided SasuNaru, others

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**C**_hapter_** O**_ne:_

Façade

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_I'm so friggin' hot! No other boys have to wear friggin' make-up in ninety degree weather... well, except Sakura. Haha._

A brunette teen, looking around to be 16, fanned himself with a few pieces of flemsy school paper. The whole school population was currently occupying the large sets of bleachers lining a classic green football field. The field was, at the moment, being refreshed with white pain, a teacher or two slowly reestablishing faded lines that stood for each yard of acreage.

The seemingly brunette boy scratched at the wig placed firmly on his head. His father had insisted that he dye his hair, but, being proud of his blonde hair, Naruto didn't want to lose it to hair dye. Brunette didn't _go_with him... and his mother also had blonde hair as well. He had her tint more-so than his father's, so he kept it memory of her.

Blinking, the boy realized he was, once more, uncomfortable all over. His green contacts were getting dry again and the make-up doused on his body was starting to melt in the blistering heat of early September. Even the air was completely dry and each kid sitting out on the stands was either irritable or insanely tolerable.

Naruto had on his blue, button-up shirt, with stuffy, tan slacks pulled up over his hips. The was the look he was going for: geek. Magnifiers stood on the edge of his nose, of course they were fake, and tacky looking as hell. He had his socks pulled all the way up to his knees, large clodhopper, school-code shoes placed on his small feet, making him clumsy as he attempted to walk.

The cheer-leading squad was performing the traditional cheer, only a few grabbing his attention. Hinata Hyuuga was a long time friend of Naruto's and she was presently kicking her legs into the air like some kind of weirdo. Naruto noted the tell-tale sign of her anxiety at executing something like this; she sported a small blush on her pale cheeks and her hands, when free, would clasp together only if for a moment. She would occasionally glance over at him and he would wave frantically, like a nerd, at the beautiful black haired girl.

This was the most pathetic pep rally Naruto had ever been to and he had been to a lot. The band was horribly off-key since school had just assembled a few weeks and they were new at it again. The color guard team was hitting each other with their batons and the choir, that had just serenaded the school with an anthem, busted almost every ear-drum within a ten meter radius.

"Oh my gawd you guys! Wazzup?!" A rather loud, pink-haired cheerleader screeched into the loud speakers when the cheer was over. "How about some spirit for your very own Flying Squirrels!!" Sakura leaned forward a bit, revealing some cleavage. Most of the men started hooting, while the girls rolled their eyes and began clapping as the football players came out. Naruto knew one person on that team and that was Kiba Inuzuka, a spiky haired jock that was friends with Shino, someone who somehow enjoyed hanging out with Naruto.

Shino was abnormally strange, never one for much talk, except when it was directed at bugs. That kinda freaked out the naturally blonde kid, but he still liked the guy's company. Any type of friends he could get, Naruto would take.

There was more to Naruto than met the eyes.

**"**Hey, Hinata-chan! You were outstandingly great in your performance!" Naruto exclaimed as the bleachers cleared. The black haired girl giggled softly, a hand over her mouth at this action.

"Oh, N-naruto-kun, I wasn't that good at all. I was very n-nervous. I still don't think cheer-leading is for me, but my f-father insists I get a scholarship this way," the girl explained and Naruto smiled at her endearingly.

"Of course cheer-leading is for you Hinata-chan! That's where all the cool people are!" Naruto inwardly cringed at his statement. Half of the people _in_ this school were all talk with nothing to back them up. He'd like to see them do some of the things he did almost every night...

"You look like you're gonna pass out, Naruto-kun. Do you wanna go home now? I c-could give you a ride?" Hinata asked, a blush on her face. Naruto smiled again. He truly adored Hinata, but, unfortunately, he couldn't associate himself with her like that. He didn't want the girl to get hurt... she was too sweet.

Hinata was a beautiful, but shy girl. She had short, blu-black hair, two strips falling to just below her chin, short bangs landing in the middle of her pale forehead. Her eyes were abnormal, but gorgeous at the same time; white orbs fading into lavender. She was petite, a perfect looking girl, with a great personality.

"Nah, that's alright Hinata-chan, I was going to stay after for a chess club meeting." Naruto lied. Truly, he was going to meet the limo parked a few blocks down so his guardian and defense teacher, Kakashi-sensei, could drive him home unharmed.

"Oh, o-okay then Naruto-k-kun... I guess I'll see you Monday?" Hinata asked, pushing her hair behind her ears nervously.

"Sure thing!" Naruto said, turning and running into the school building, hopefully towards the chess club.

**.:WÖ®k3ÐUþSÒS3xÛaL:.**

**"**Sooo, how was school today?" Kakashi asked as he opened the door for Naruto. Naruto shook his head, sighing and closing his eyes as Kakashi closed the door and began his walk for the driver's seat. Once he got in, he turned and looked at Naruto.

Kakashi-sensei was Naruto's long time friend, a father figure of sorts, and defense teacher. He taught Naruto everything he knew and then some. He was 20-something, never telling Naruto his true age, with silver hair that shot up like it'd just been blown in the wind. His name meant scarecrow and that was the perfect description. Kakashi was tall and kind of gangly looking. Of course, under his baggy clothes were tons of ripped muscles, and under that mask he wore all the time, well... Naruto didn't quite know... _yet._ He'd see that sonovabitch's face someday.

"It was as okay as it's ever gonna get for me, sensei. Bullies and not being able to stick up for myself. Potential girlfriends, but no dates. And being frikkin' uncomfortable as _hell_in this outfit!" Naruto gritted as he ripped off his fake glasses, letting them land wherever he pitched them. "Kakashi-sensei... it's so hard."

"What is? Oh... you mean life?" Kakashi smirked as the blush staining Naruto's face.

"You're a pervert, did you know that?"

"You remind me everyday." Kakashi admitted as he drove down the street.

"Do you want to have hot limo sex with me?"

"As tempting as that is, you alluring child, Iruka and Arashi would kill me. Besides, you wouldn't know what to do with me," Kakashi teased, glancing back at his favorite pupil's face. He was looking sadly out of the window.

"Ah, too bad then." he said dejectedly, joking mood quickly swept away. He knew Kakashi was more like a mentor for him and was in a relationship with his educational teacher Iruka-sensei. He always joked with the old pervert because it was comfortable and would take his mind off of life. But, today, it was harder to do. Truthfully, no matter how many people surrounded him, Naruto was lonely.

His only real friends were people who didn't know the real him, or adults that he couldn't tell anything to because it was embarrassing because they were all like parents.

"Is Dad home today?" Naruto asked from his seat in the back, not getting his hopes up. His dad was gone often, having to take care of certain business proposals.

"He is, actually. But don't be surprised if someone interrupts your time together. He's a busy man. You know that."

"That's the bad part," Naruto replied quietly, watching as the sky began to darken with rain clouds.

**.:1MßÚRN!Ng4Û:.**

"Naruto-kun!" Iruka exclaimed from his position at his table. He got up quickly to greet Naruto with a hug. The blonde, currently brunette, smiled softly at his mother-like teacher. He loved Iruka so much. He was like the mother he never had.

"Kakashi." Iruka greeted, pecking his tall lover on the lips. The two had known each other for a year or so and instantly connected. They had gotten together quite early and had stayed together, regardless of how perverted Kakashi seemed. They really loved each other. Naruto sighed at how romantic they were.

"How was school?" Iruka asked, just like Kakashi. The man had chocolate brown eyes and matching hair, dark, soft skin, and a gorgeous smile. There was a scar on his nose, just like Kakashi had a scar on his left eye. Reminders that they were involved with the mafia.

"Meh." Naruto groaned as he hugged Iruka again, wanting the comfort that he needed. He knew it was a bit girly, all huggy like that, but he really felt sad today.

"Hey, hey, get off my partner like that." Kakashi said, pulling on Naruto, who clung to Iruka.

"Nooo!" Naruto replied indignantly. Kakashi twitched.

"Let go." he pulled harder.

"Irukaaaa!" Naruto had his eyes closed, holding on for dear life. Iruka giggled at the pair's childish behavior. It was one of the endearing qualities he could always find in both.

"Naruto." a voice said suddenly, making Naruto let go, sending Kakashi backwards, Naruto landing on his chest. He looked up at his dad, blush staining his face.

"Ahahaa...ha... Heeey, Dad. Dad's friend." Naruto waved from his position on top of Kakashi. And what a position it was. Naruto was pretty much straddling Kakashi. He grinned apologetically as he pushed himself off, offering Kakashi his hand.

"Naruto, dinner is already prepared, I thought I might come tell you myself while I give Orochimaru here a tour." Arashi said, blue eye's sparkling. He was just a bigger carbon copy of Naruto's true appearance, sans the whisker-like scars Naruto had, the luminous tan skin and the lighter colored hair.

"Aa, sorry Dad. Nice to meet you Orochimaru." Naruto bowed slightly, waving goodbye to Kakashi and Iruka who looked at him with worry, following his father and his new associate.

The young blonde kept a slow pace, trailing behind his dad as the two men conversed. He was okay with this.. it was like this all the time. They made their way through the huge mansion they had, gold trimmings, high tech objects, and servants bustling around everywhere.

"The Hyuuga Clan and the Uchiha Clan are just not seeing it our way, Arashi." Orochimaru brought Naruto's attention to the conversation between himself and his father.

_Hyuuga? Like, Hinata Hyuuga?_Naruto thought to himself in confusion. Hinata did nothing to conceal herself at all... why not? Was she actually part of this all? _There's no way. She's way too conspicuous. Maybe she doesn't know... therefore, no one knows about her. Hmm._

"Their allegiance lies with the Uchiha clan." Orochimaru scowled as he said this. "Those traitors."

"Aa, Orochimaru. Don't jump to those serious conclusions. It won't do us any good. I'm surprised that Neji hasn't already taken over, given that his father has been dead for quite some time now. But Hizashi doesn't seem likely to give up such a big position, although he knows he'll be in trouble once Neji does indeed thinks that he is ready to take his leadership position. I believe his cockiness is his downfall. He doesn't even shield his children. Like Hinata Hyuuga? She goes to Naruto's school and apparently knows nothing of her father's activities."

"Naruto knows her? Isn't that dangerous too, Arashi?" Orochimaru glanced back at Naruto, to which Naruto ducked his head down, as if he hadn't been listening in the first place.

"No. Naruto is perfectly disguised and he's one hell of an actor. Has never gotten caught. All of our moving has been on my slip-ups, which is more than the Yamanaka family can say. Ino is quite the loudmouth. Even the Uchiha family has been uprooted once because of a slip-up on Itachi's part. Of course, Itachi does what he pleases. He isn't afraid of anything."

"Ah, yes. Naruto is quite impressive." Orochimaru winked at the blonde walking along behind them and Naruto smiled at him, blushing at the direct compliment. Arashi smiled too.

They arrived at the dining hall sooner than Naruto had expected; the conversation had been too interesting. The dining hall was very large, just like the rest of the house. It's decorations always reminded Naruto of something from a wedding reception, everything was so white, sweet, and... stiff. But, nonetheless, it was his house. He actually thought the table setting was quite beautiful, candles, fine china, shiny glass. All of it was topped off with a beautiful chandelier. Naruto thought that the table was a bit too long, though. But his dad needed that for meetings and who was Naruto to say anything?

_Ugh. I always hate when our business partners show up. They are so...touchy._

"This is our dining room," Arashi was saying as Orochimaru looked around, appreciating the luxury.

"You have a very nice house, Ara-kun." Orochimaru stated and Naruto glanced at his father's blushing face.

_You've gotta be kidding me_, Naruto thought sourly. _I have to get out of here... and out of these flippin' clothes!_

"Father," Naruto stated and Arashi turned to look at him. "Could I be excused for just a few moments? This disguise is killing me."

Arashi smiled apologetically. "Of course, Naruto, how could I forget?"

"Thanks." Naruto replied, turning to Orochimaru and bowing as to symbolize his respect as he left. Orochimaru inclined his head and the young blonde spun on his heel, out of the dining room doors.

Arashi watched his young son disappear and turned to Orochimaru, who was also watching him leave.

"Your son is very... different." Orochimaru admitted as he glanced at Arashi, his blonde partner. Arashi scratched the back of his head.

"Yes, he's very... eccentric."

"He'll do well."

"Orochimaru," Arashi glared at his most valued partner. "I already said that I don't want him involved with all of this until... until he's ready." Arashi trusted Orochimaru's opinions, he knew Naruto would do well.

"Until he's ready? Or until you're ready, Ara-kun?" Orochimaru inquired as he sat at the dining table, maids bustly through the door with newly cooked food. He mumbled a small thanks as they set an appetizer in front of him.

"Naruto is smart, athletic, strong as hell, but... he's reckless. His anger is hard to control." Arashi ruled as he took a sip of his red, red wine. "I know that he'll do well. But until he learns that recklessness is a weakness, I will not allow him to become a part of this life." Arashi honestly didn't know what to think anymore. Maybe he was being too overprotective. But Naruto's rage that day... he would never forget it. Naruto had almost died, had almost killed, had almost...

"I know it's hard to let a child into the business. I myself was hard letting Kabuto in on my little games. He's just a student, no blood ties or anything, but I feel connected with him. It was heart breaking to see him hurt. But, he's come so far and knows so much. A very strong investment. A very good ally." Orochimaru tasted his food and smiled in delight. It was delicious! "Naruto has done so well with keeping his life a secret, like we were just discussing. Why wouldn't he do well with anything else he decides to tackle?"

"Orochimaru," Arashi whined, pained look on his face. "You aren't making this any easier."

"Ah. Sorry, my dear." Orochimaru apologized and relished in the red speckling the blonde's face.

"Eat, you perverted fiend." Arashi muttered, taking another swig of his wine, finishing the glass and referencing to more from the maid sitting close by.

**.:mÝ-hÀ-hÂ-hÄ:.**

Naruto scrubbed his face harshly, trying to get all those nasty looking freckles off his cheeks. His blonde hair was spraying out artistically in all directions, shining in the gleam of the setting sun staring into his windows. He had changed his clothes, got rid of those ridiculous braces, taken out those God-forsaken contacts, and washed his beautiful, but sweat-matted hair. Now he was just trying to get rid of the cake of a face that his make-up artist had dolled him up with. Naruto loved Haku dearly, but the boy was too worried about Naruto getting caught to take it easy with the make-up.

Haku was a beautiful, I mean _beautiful_, boy that was actually one of Naruto's friends and also his make-up artist. He had been such since Naruto was 5 years old. Haku was older than Naruto by a few years and had already graduated from high school, so he lived full-time in Naruto's huge mansion with his lover, Zabuza. Zabuza was a body guard of Arashi's, lethal and cold. Naruto always wondered what Haku fell in love with; Zabuza was dickhead.

Naruto's room was surprisingly empty, except for the big bookshelf filled with the books and knick-knacks his mother had given him in her will. She had given Naruto a lot of stuff, moreso than even Arashi, which puzzled Naruto to no end. Why did she give him more than the one she loved? She hadn't known Naruto for very long, so why would she give him more things? Anyways, the young blonde's room was an ocean-color blue, while his bed sheets were a creamy color, his headboard a nice dark mahogany. He had a balcony with cream-color curtains, but they were open at the moment, exposing a beautiful setting sun. Their mansion was beside the ocean and Naruto loved the place dearly.

His fashion sense in school and at home couldn't be more different. At school, which was half of Naruto's closet, consisted of khakis, plaid, and clodhoppers. At home, which was the other half of the closet, was made up of everything from leather to cotton to silk. Naruto had a great fashion sense at home. He was currently wearing a tight blue sweater-like shirt, except it had no sleeves, exposing lean, toned arms. He had on a pair of comfortable black sweatpants and decided bare-feet would do. It wasn't like he was trying to impress anyone anyways.

Naruto sighed as he finally swiped the last freckle, his face a bit red. He plucked at his hair a little bit and turned to his balcony windows.

"If I could swim across the sea to get away from this place... I would." he whispered against the glass and the rays of pinks, purples, and soft oranges hit his face, making his eyes water. His window fogged a bit in front of him, so he wiped it away and decided to go eat dinner. He wondered what his dad and Orochimaru would be discussing now. Hopefully not how pretty they thought each other was. Naruto rolled his eyes. Arashi and his tastes. Bisexual nitwit.

Of course, Naruto loved his father very much. He was just slightly upset that his day had to be wasted with Orochimaru here. It's not like they couldn't talk over the phone. He narrowed his eyes. What a sucky evening.

"This is delicious, Arashi, who orders the food around here?" Naruto heard Orochimaru say as he neared the dining room.

"Me, of course. If it was up to Naruto, we'd be having ramen every night. Not that I don't allow him to have a few times each month, but he's insane with it. It's like an obsession."

"Ramen? I'm afraid I've never had it."

"Then you're missing out on a whooooole bunch." Naruto answered for his father as he entered the room, shirt slightly riding up, his hip bones and belly button showing. Orochimaru blinked owlishly at his appearance. Arashi sighed.

"Naruto, what exactly are you wearing? We have company."

Naruto answered quickly, "Oh, I'm sure Orochimaru-dono doesn't mind if I relax in my own home, Dad. Right, Orochimaru-dono?" Orochimaru glanced at Arashi to see a glare hardened into his features.

"It's fine. I like to feel comfortable at my place too. Naruto is justified, Arashi." Orochimaru spoke around his food, making Naruto instantly like the guy. Nice save. Point 1.

"See there, Dad?" Naruto smiled mischeviously, fox-like grin mocking his father. "No harm done."

"You're lucky it's Orochimaru and not someone else. I've taught you better than this."

"Well maybe I trust Orochimaru-dono." Naruto let his eyes sweep over towards Orochimaru's pretty golden ones. He could tell Orochimaru was enjoying this. He grinned even wider. Let's play.

Arashi frowned.

"Oh, you don't trust me, Ara-kun?" Orochimaru feigned hurt, taking the hint from Naruto. Time to mess with dad!

"Orochima-"

"Goodness! And here I was thinking your being partners with me for years would have some effect. Apparently it hasn't. I hadn't even met Naruto until today!"

_Haha, this guy is good!_

Arashi was getting a bit panicked. Was Orochimaru for serious?

"It was just-"

"Geez, Dad. Give the poor guy a break!"

"Maybe I should leave now."

"Orochimaru! P-please sit down! I assure you that my trust for you is-" Arashi broke off at Naruto and Orochimaru snickered and gave each other a high-five. Point 2 for Orochimaru! "What? What is so funny?" Arashi sputtered, looking back and forth, until realization hit him. He'd been had! "You are both assholes!" the blonde said angrily, standing.

"Puh-puh-puh-puh-leaaase sit dowwwwn." Naruto mimicked and giggled even harder.

"Naruto!"

"Oh, Arashi, you cute thing. We were only joking with you. Of course I know you trust me, or else I wouldn't have even met Naruto _today_. Goodness, you worrying man." Orochimaru grinned widely, snake-like charm placating Arashi almost immediately.

"Ahh, Le Sighhh." Naruto said as he finally managed to stop giggling, but that broke Orochimaru into peels of more laughter and soon Naruto was giggling again too. Arashi smiled. He was glad they got along.

"Naruto," a voice interrupted and the young blonde swiveled to find Kakashi standing in the dining room doorway. "Could I steal you for a moment or two?" the silverette sounded serious and Naruto immediately stood.

"Sure thing. If you would excuse me." Naruto bowed like he had before and left the room.

**.:iƒÍÇÖÙLdT3llYÕu,IWoÛLDñT:.**

Ending A/N: So, what did you think, my loves? It's more like a prologue of sorts, if you will. Kinda describing the situation and junk. Ahh, another yaoi. STUPID SEXY ADDICTION.


	2. Sundays At the Uzumaki Manor

**.:M**_aster _**o**_f _**D**_isguise_**:.**

**b**_y: _**S**_tupefiedNarutard_

_**NOTES: **_I just got home from work! PAHNURR BUHRED. Or, as the Japanese would say it, "Panala buledo." Standing on your feet for seven hours after no sleep with no breaks kinda gets you a little tired... but NOT ME!! AHHAHAH. My feet hurt a little, but, hehe, I'm pretty energetic. Prolly cause I've been pumping myself with MTN. DEW. IM JACKED UP :DDD I really like writing this story, so please don't hesitate to leave me a **tasty review**, so I can actually get a basis on how I'm doing! WHOOOOO! Ohhh, btw, I didn't mean for Naruto to come off as flirtatious at ALL. He was just testing Orochimaru.

He's the master of disguise and you may never recognizeeee~!

**Feed the starving author, puh-leezzzzze~!**

_**Summary**_: Naruto is the son of mob boss Arashi Uzumaki, thus preventing him from leading a normal life. Disguising himself in school is one thing, but living life as the real Naruto is sometimes worse. After befriending a member of an enemy clan, how can his façade in both realities stay together? [YAOI, ItaNaru, OroAra, onesided SasuNaru, others]

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**C**_hapter_** T**_wo:_

Sundays At the Uzumaki Manor...

* * *

"Sooo, Kakashi, just what was it that you had to pull me from an entirely entertaining dinner?" Naruto asked, looking sideways towards his tall bodyguard. The young blonde could see a smile hidden under Kakashi's mask.

"Why else, my young padawon-learner? I have another mission for you."

Naruto's face straightened instantaneously, stopping in the middle of the hallway. "Does Dad know about it?"

"That's a negative."

Naruto's face looked thoughtful, then he grinned. "Good." He started walking again, Kakashi following him to their "secret room." Okay, so... it wasn't _really_ secret, it was just a room that was fairly unused. At least, that's what Arashi thought.

Kakashi was loyal to Arashi, no doubt, but he hadn't really spent that much of his life with him... Whereas Naruto had always been there tagging along. That's why, when Naruto asked, Kakashi, being the proud man he was, allowed the young man to go on "missions" from other, smaller mobs. There were some things a certain mob couldn't pay for... and Kakashi was supposed to take care of it all. But he'd become lazier as the days went on and Naruto became fiestier, tired of spending his days learning things from Kakashi that he already knew.

Kakashi looked down at the boy he felt like was his own son. The boy was smiling. He was happy to be doing this job... He couldn't help but wonder why. Was there an ulterior motive under the boy's eager willingness to help in any type of criminal activity? He always watched the blonde's serious eyes as they completed the mission, something deep inside of them... like they were almost turning a different color from the original cerulean blue. Almost red. There was a maturity in that pair of eyes that Kakashi had a hard time understanding. Naruto was usually so... childishly happy that it was hard to grasp the concept of Naruto ever growing up.

"So, what's this one include?" Naruto broke Kakashi's line of thought as they entered the "secret room." Kakashi smiled again under his mask, pulling the papers from his vest and setting them on the wooden table in the middle of the room.

The room looked like an interrogation room, a long wooden table in the middle of the room, a single light dangling above it in a threatening manner. There were two chairs on either side of the table and there was a big mirror on the wall. The room was always dark, sans the light above the table.

Naruto was glancing at the papers now, narrowing his eyes as he skimmed the contents. "_What?"_ he asked suddenly, throwing his head up to glare at Kakashi suspiciously. Kakashi thought he would do as much.

"You want me to go on a _date_ with a _Uchiha clan member_?" he yelped, face flushing. "It's... It's a _guy!"_

"Exactly. He likes both, but mostly is seen with guys younger than him. Seme, I suppose." Naruto flushed again at this part. "It'll only be _one_ date, Naruto. What's the problem?"

"Are you implying I'm an uke, Kakashi-sensei?"

"If the penis fits."

Naruto stared at Kakashi for a while, blank look on his face.

"I don't think I can accurately think of a comeback to that."

Kakashi laughed softly and watched Naruto glance over the papers in front of him again. He seemed incredulous. Of course, what boy in his right mind wouldn't be? But Naruto wasn't ordinary.

"Kakashi-sensei... Do you think... do you think Mom would have approved of me taking these secret missions?"

Kakashi frowned under his mask, looking seriously at his favorite student. He looked up thoughtfully. "I think your mother was... Well, she would have worried for your safety... but she always spoiled you as much as possible. I think it was to keep your innocence..." he trailed off, Naruto gazing at him expectantly. "I don't think she would have minded such small missions, Naruto." Kakashi finished, watching Naruto turn to unlock the file cabinet behind him.

"I accept the mission, Kakashi, but if I see you OR Jiraiya anywhere NEAR the vicinty, I'll have to slaughter you with my own bare hands." Naruto narrowed his eyes in suspicion. _Those pervs better not even think of using this as blackmail._ _Or "research."_

_ "_Alright, the date is Thursday evening at 5pm. You are to meet him at _Creme de la Creme_ for dinner. You won't miss him because all Uchihas pretty much look the same. I'll get you the picture by tomorrow. This mission is for the Momoko clan because they made a deal with the Uchihas that if they won a bet they would have to give up their son for a night of Uchiha fun. The Uchihas made the same promise, but, as you know, they won. So, instead of sending their precious son out, they hired us." Kakashi explained, pausing to catch Naruto's reaction.

"Who would bet their son off?" the blonde inquired, puzzled.

"Prideful bastards. Now. I will be driving you to the restaurant, but the Uchiha has free reign with you for the rest of the night. I'm not sure what he'll want with you... so... be on guard, okay?"

"Yes'm."

"I'm serious Naruto, he could rape you if you don't pay attention."

"Excuse me, but how would I not know I was being raped?"

"..."

"You're so freakin' weird!" The blonde yelled in accusation, before he turned to leave. Kakashi smirked.

Yes. Yes he was.

**.:Ðøñ†Çr¥ÓÜt:.**

"Naruto?" A knock on the blonde's door made the boy look up from his open books, homework splayed across his bed.

"Come in," he recognized his father's voice and the door opened to reveal the man. He looked almost hesitant to come all the way in, but finally moved in and closed the door behind him.

"Hey, doing homework?" the man asked as he walked up slowly. Naruto nodded slowly, eyes still on the book in front of him. He was reading the same sentence over and over again, waiting for his father to say something else. "So... What do you think of Orochimaru?"

The blonde looked up at his father dully. Was that all he wanted? Nothing else? Was that what his Dad ever wanted to know anymore? How'd you like this? What do you think of that? Why couldn't he talk to him about things Kakashi talked to him about? Or asked him things that Iruka asked him? Naruto's relationship with his father was a bit out of sorts. When his mother died, Arashi had changed. He focused on work more than anything, leaving Naruto in Kakashi's care, Iruka teaching him. Kakashi had to tell him about girls, about sex, eventually about boys when Naruto asked (runs in the family?). Iruka had to explain what his body was going through, what love was, what kindness was. They taught him how to fight, how to play football, how to sing Karaoke. His father taught him... to act.

"He was... cool." He answered in a monotone, eyes skimming back over his page. Arashi looked out of Naruto's open windows. The sky was a lovely shade of dark blue, bright stars twinkling in merriment. The moon was large and shimmered it's reflection across the ocean view. Naruto followed his gaze and sighed, sitting up from his position on his belly.

"Orochimaru was cool, Dad. I'm glad you like him." Arashi head swiveled towards his son again, soft smile on his face.

"He was the only person there that really understood my pain when your mother died. He was the one that stopped me from being reckless and convinced me to stay with you. He told me all the things I needed to hear... and we became sort of like best friends." Naruto's dad explained, eyes soft and romantic. Naruto had to look away. He didn't want to hear this... He had to...

"Naruto... I sincerely hope you don't hate me for the life we have." Arashi's words stung at Naruto more than his father knew and instant tears sprung into his eyes, falling down his cheeks, some sticking to his long lashes.

Arashi watched his son's face contort and he instantly wanted to take back his words. Of course he knew his son didn't hate him. He told him he loved him almost everyday. "Naruto... I didn't mean..."

"How could you ask me that? You... you don't even know me, Dad." Naruto sniffled, wiping his eyes quickly, embarrassed. He stood, moving past his Dad. "I'll be with Iruka and Kakashi if you need me."

Naruto stormed out of the room, running quickly through the large halls, hearing the sound of his bare feet against the marble floor. Kakashi and Iruka's room wasn't far. Once the blonde was there, he knocked softly. When the door opened he fell into Iruka's arms and sobbed the tears he'd been keeping locked inside.

**

* * *

**

"You're ugly and you can't read good."

"It's 'You're ugly and you can't read _well_,' Naruto. Please try to listen to the lessons I give you. You even go to school. Do you actually pay attention?"

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I guess not." Iruka sighed, bringing his fingers to his temples and massaging. Sundays at the Uzumaki manor...

"Whatever. Kakashi, you're ugly and you can't read _well_." Naruto exaggerated the last word exactly how Iruka did, earning him a glare. He was currently upside down on his favorite chair in Iruka's office. His hair was feathering over the deep red of the carpet, face turning the same shade from staying upturned for so long.

"Sure, I can read well. How do you think I read IchaIcha?"

"You slobber all over the pages and fantasize the rest in your head." Naruto retorted, bored out of his mind. Sundays at the Uzumaki manor...

Kakashi smirked under his mask. Touché...

Iruka's office was large, just like everything in the manor. His desk was mahogany with a big window behind it, covered in dark green curtains. The walls were a deep brown, while the carpet was a lovely shade of dark blood red. There were two big shelves on either wall of the room, books filling them. Most of them were for Naruto's extra tutelage, while some were for Arashi, Kakashi, or Iruka himself. Naruto liked to read them in his spare time, but he didn't feel much like reading today.

"Hey, you guys!" Naruto suddenly shouted, making Iruka jump and open his closed eyes. "Can you guys take me somewhere? I just remembered it! I can't believe I would forget something as important as this!"

"What? What is it?" Iruka asked, alarmed. Did he forget something too? A birthday? An anniversary? Something??

"The children's orphanage is holding a volunteer big-brother-big-sister-ish thing and I totally forgot about it! Those children need someone to look up to and if there isn't anyone there then at least I'll be there and we'll play and they'll feel loved and we'll all be, like, best friends forever and they'll text me and I'll be like, 'Idk, my bff Rose,' and you'll be like, study! And I'll be all like, 'No way, man!'" Naruto babbled in excitement, grabbing things he had taken out from Iruka's bookshelf and placing them back where he got them. Then he turned and walked out the door, still talking.

Iruka grinned. Apparently, his life lessons Naruto had listened to. Naruto still had a big heart, one that remembered charity events like this one. For that, Iruka was extremely glad. He'd rather have Naruto compared to a spoiled Uchiha brat any day. Iruka's past was long for such a young person, only in his early twenties. He had served since he was able to serve and taught when he was taught. In essence, Iruka's very life was dedicated to teaching and serving those of the mafia... When he his family had been traded from the Uchiha's possession to the Uzumaki possession, things had changed drastically. For the better.

He had met Arashi, first of all, the man who took him in and treated him as an equal, and, secondly, he had met Kakashi. Who was, in all seriousness, the love of his life. And, of course, Naruto. He was, in every way, the child Iruka would never have. And he loved Naruto so very much. So that his teachings and morals were being put to good use by Naruto was an absolute honor.

Iruka smiled as he made his way to follow Naruto and Kakashi, who were already moving towards the limo. "Hurry up, you grandma!" Naruto yelled back at him as he sat in the leather seat. Kakashi started the limo and Iruka crawled into the back seat with Naruto.

"Watch your mouth." Iruka grinned and shut the door to the shiny, black limo.

**gØtàR¹Ðé±hä†Šsmòóther±HàÑäLÌmø§ìn3**

"Aww! Look at all the children!" Naruto perked up as the festivities came into sight. Today was the annual childrens' orphanage festival where everyone from all over the community volunteered to pair with a child with no parents to join in fun activities like face painting, trampoline jumping, etc. When the blonde found out about it he had marked his calendar and cackled with excitement. What young minds could accomplish when planted with evil seeds of scheme-- I mean... what?

The day, thankfully, was bright and filled with cheerful laughter as Naruto hopped out with Iruka and Kakashi in tow. The festival was being held in the back of a church, a big football field used as the place for the activities. The church was beautiful, Naruto noted, looking like a place of sanctuary. Naruto wondered why he felt safe here, he hadn't really believed that there was a God above(1), not after what happened... But that was thinking for another day! This day was for the kids. All of those kids who didn't know the love of their real parents. Come to think of it, Naruto felt a little like an orphan himself. His mother had... well she was dead, and his father was basically gone all of the time... Kakashi and Iruka weren't always there, so Naruto had really grown up without knowing the _real_ love of his biological parents.

The trio made their way up to the sign-up table, a long line assembled there already. It seemed like this was a generous community. But there were also a lot of orphans here that needed this day of love and adoration. Perhaps even some of them might go home with new parents! Kakashi watched Naruto's face in amusement, about fifty different emotions crossing his face in the span of a minute. He knew what Naruto was thinking each and every time and he wondered how such a young mind could think about so many different things.

Finally, after much sweating and commenting, on Kakashi's part, the trio made it to the table.

"Heya! Thanks for coming to this lovely event!" The receptionist, a girl with bleach blonde hair and light blue eyes around Naruto's age, welcomed them. "My name is Ino Yamanaka and I'll be assigning you to your children. If you'll be so kind as to state your names, we'll get started on figuring out who to pair you with!" Naruto inwardly snickered as Kakashi cringed at the sunshine brightness of the receptionist. He knew her from school and from coming to practice with Hinata. Ino was on the cheerleading squad, but she wasn't like Sakura at all(2.) Ino was actually pretty nice, albeit a bit loud and obnoxious. When she had a point, she made it or nothing happened until she did. Naruto was glad he wasn't wearing his disguise. Partly because he would be sweating like Satan's balls, and partly because he didn't want to deal with Ino's opinions on Sakura's performance on Friday.

"Name please." Ino smiled sweetly and Naruto realized it was his turn, Kakashi and Iruka already gone. He wondered if they had said anything to him before they left. Like where they were supposed to meet and whatever? Oh well.

"Uhhh..." Naruto pondered this question for a moment. Should he put down his real name? Well... what would it hurt? No one even knew he existed in this town. "Naruto." he answered simply and Ino wrote it down quickly. "Welcome Naruto. I'm going to ask you a few basic questions and these will determine which child you will be paired with."

"That sounds great!"

"Or you could just stay with me." Ino murmured loud enough for the blonde to hear as she gathered her laptop in front of her. Naruto almost snort-giggled. Ino was attracted to him? Well, he didn't really look like a geeknerd right now, sooo... It was possible. It was really funny how girls would flirt with him when he was like this, but when he looked like a geeknerd it was barely possible to get them to look at him. How tragic. To think they were missing such a hottie. Or... at least that's what Kakashi always said.

"Okay, so, first question: What's your favorite color?"

_Wow, this sounds like a Quizilla quiz._

"Orange."

"You find a wallet on the street, what do you do with it?"

"Try to find the owner without stealing the money." _I think it might be..._

And it continued like this for a little bit until Ino submitted the answers and smiled.

"Your match is Konohamaru! Be careful, though, Konohamaru is a bit testy... sooo... I mean, I'm sure he can find another match or something if you don't want to go. You can just sit here with me." Ino batted her eyelashes prettily and Naruto almost laughed out loud.

"No, Konohamaru sounds fine with me. Someone has to do it! I'll be the sacrifice!" Naruto looked into the distance dramatically and Ino giggled.

"You're cute, haha. Oh well, I tried. So... I'll see you around?" Ino said, blushing.

"Sure... see ya." Naruto said smoothly, cracking up in his mind. _Oh, that's sad. _

**.....**

** "**Whatever, you little shit! Get back here!!!" Naruto yelled loudly and a few mothers that were helping out glared at him and steered the little ones away.

"Try and get me, asshole!" Konohamaru chuckled as he ran... until he tripped over his own shoe and went sprawling. "Oh... owww."

Suddenly, a shadow was cast over his head and he laughed nervously as he looked over his shoulder. A big shadow with gleaming eyes and smoke coming from it's mouth was looming over him. The figure popped it's knuckles.

"Well, well, well... Konohamaru... looks like I've got you now."

"Ah... heh... heeh... Listen, we can talk this out..."

"Oh no... no, no, no... We can settle this right... NOW!"

And the tickling ensued.

"NoooooooooooooOoooOoOOoooo!" Konohamaru screeched, trying to wiggle away from the deadly digits Naruto was tickling him with. "Chiiild abuuuuuseeee!"

Naruto laughed at the kid who reminded him a bit of himself. Sure, the brat seemed spoiled, but he was a cutey and Naruto knew it was all an act. It was nice to interact with him.

The blonde sat down beside Konohamaru. "Sooo..," he began, glancing sideways at the kid.

"So...?" Konohamaru scowled at him, before giving it up and smiling. He turned his full attention to the teen in front of him and waited.

"Do you mind if I come visit you once and a while?" Naruto asked sweetly, making Konohamaru blush ten shades of red. He sputtered incoherently for a few seconds before smiling shyly.

"...yeah, that'd be cool. You can be my sensei!!" Konohamaru proposed, jumping up. "It'll be so cool. My friends and I could learn how you got to be so fast and ruthless!" A slightly insulted smile graced Naruto's features as he listened to Konohamaru ramble on and on about Naruto's lack of feelings and insane skills. But he guessed that was okay... people were actually looking up to him! This would be so great!!

"Yes, and then you'll actually be awesome and not laaaame!" Naruto agreed, Konohamaru nodding until he stopped and looked confused.

"Heeeey, that's not nice."

"Sorry, I'm too ruthless to understand you. All I heard was, 'Durp de durp durp.'" Naruto chirped and sprung up as Konohamaru lunged at him. "Hahaahha."

"Come, now, Hinata, it's almost time for my meeting. We've done our part and showed up, now we leave."

"Yes, Father." Naruto's ears perked up at the sound of his friends voice filtering out of the crowd. He glanced around, trying not to look too suspicious, and finally spotted the shy girl from his school. She was as stunning as ever, with her lavender outfit against her pale skin and gentle disposition. The blonde glanced at the man she was with, briefly taking him in before turning back to Konohamaru to half-listen to him chatter. Remembering Hinata's father's face, he examined it mentally. How could he have been so blind? Of course Hinata was part of this whole thing... Did she really not know?

Naruto was surely surprised at himself for not remembering those startling white-lavender eyes before now. The picture Naruto had seen in Hiashi's file in his father's cabinet had puzzled him and captivated him all at once. Who were these people with such piercing eyes? he had wondered at the time. He reprimanded himself silently for being too wrapped up in Hinata's kindness and friendship to forget something like his familys' enemy.

"...ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME!?" Konohamaru's screech finally fell into his ears and he turned to look at the boy, a look on his face that said, "Seriously?" Konohamura stuck his tongue out and Naruto scowled. Standing, Naruto helped Konohamaru up, looking at the setting sun quietly. Today had been nice, running around, eating, playing like a child. It was a lot different from home and school, where he would play his role without a word. Well... without a lot of words.

Turning, Naruto bumped into a body, but his reflexes quickly caught a skinny arm and pulled the body close to himself, holding a small waist against his own. A light gasp made him aware it was a young lady and, once he knew she wouldn't fall, he pulled back and smiled charmingly at her.

"O-oh... I-i'm so s-sorry!" Hinata stuttered in apology, blushing profusely and Naruto almost smiled at the familiarity and the honesty from the Hyuuga.

"It's not a problem," he answered smoothly, watching the black haired girl blush even redder if possible. Konohomaru watched the scene with wide-eyed interest, taking in the interaction.

"Hinata," a rough voice said from behind and Naruto glanced up at the man's piercing eyes. _Fuck, this is not good. What if he recognizes me?_ "Who is this?"

"U-uh..." Hinata looked like she would die of embarrassment if she told the truth, so she stuttered around for a little bit, trying to think of something.

"I'm a friend from school. We just bumped into each other." Naruto answered him evenly, instantly disliking the man. He knew that pressure, the feeling of not being good enough. Someone like Hinata should never feel something like that. Hiashi seemed to be judging him as well, measuring him to see if he was "good" enough to associate with Hinata.

"You look very familiar. What is your name?" The man said, narrowing his eyes, pupils dialating. Naruto smiled sweetly.

"Mizuki Hayao," the blonde answered quickly, not missing a beat. He didn't flinch under the searching eyes of the lethal man in front of him... and lethal he _was_. The Hyuuga clan was as deadly as the Uchiha clan, if not more regal. Their deeds were known even to the world at large (though no one knew any names or faces) and even movies and books were dedicated to their prestige. And it was this clan that was enemy's with his own, at least Orochimaru had said so. He wondered, briefly, if Hiashi recognized his father's face mixed with his own. He should've used a disguise! Curse his own stupidity!

"Hiashi Hyuuga," the man responded, holding his hand out. Naruto glanced at it, but did not move to take the man's hand. The older gangster shared a secretive smile with Naruto, pulling his hand back to himself to fall limply at his side. The blonde teen met the gaze evenly and Hinata watched the interaction with a bit of trepidation. She knew that look. Her father was up to something...

"U-um... father. We will be late." Hinata said to cut the tension. This Hayao would be crushed if he kept wordlessly defying her father. And she thought Hayao kind for not embarrassing her...

"Very well," Hiashi replied, nonchalantly, grinning at his daughter and turning back to Naruto only to bow slightly as a dismissal. Naruto bowed as well, eyes always connected with Hiashi's. "Very pleased to meet you, Mizuki."

"Likewise," Naruto nodded at Hinata and she blushed crimson, smiling a little smile at him. He turned abruptly, grabbing Konohamaru by his collar and searching the crowd for Iruka and Kakashi. He needed to get out of there...

Hiashi watched the attractive young man go, pulling his little partner along. The boy had guts, he'd say that much. And he was attractive in a way he hadn't ever seen before. He couldn't help but feel like he'd seen that face before... But, no matter. He needed to think about his next meeting. But, throughout the night, the stunning blonde never seemed to leave his thoughts.

**.............**

"Naruto, I can't believe you would be so careless!" Arashi yelled angrily, eyes scowled, face turning red. Naruto had _never_ been caught before... He always tended to himself, wore his disguises and all that. "Were you even thinking?" He inquired snootily, not catching his own snarky tone as Naruto kept his eyes downcast. "Can I not even trust you at all? You want to get killed? Do you want me to get--"

"Don't you _dare _finish that question! You _asshole!!_" Naruto screamed suddenly, knocking the wind from the older blonde. "I've _never_ been caught before! Ever! I wasn't even technically 'caught' this time! I try so hard... for _you!_ You always throw it back in my face. And how dare you ask me if I want you to get hurt. Not after mother... You are all I have..," Naruto stopped talking, looking up calmly at his father. It scared Arashi how easily Naruto erected a mask over his vehement emotions. The boy was too talented in field that he shouldn't be. Suddenly, Naruto turned, stalking off. Arashi winced when he heard a slamming door and the sound of shattering class. He hoped it wasn't an expensive one this time.

"GODDAMNIT! STUPID MOTHERFUCKING FUCK!" Naruto screeched loudly from his room and Arashi winced yet again. He knew that was directed towards him. Boy was he messing up lately...

**

* * *

**

SiN: Okay, so. Yeaaaah.

1- I'm not saying that I do or don't believe in God in this statement, so please refrain from ignorant comments.

2- I actually like Sakura, but I do need someone to bash... and I used to hate her sooo...

Sakura it is.

_**NEXT CHAPTER:**_ Enter Itachi. The Date. What will happen?


End file.

Naruto, Humor, Romance