Harry Potter 1. Default Chapter

Title: The Journal

Author: Acacia Dyre

Disclaimer: None of the characters or settings belong to me, only this very odd idea.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: This is extremely AU and set before Percy's fifth year- that means it is before Ron and Harry's first year at Hogwart's. I am aware of everything that has happened in canon from the beginning, but I had an idea and I wanted to work it out anyway. Concrit about the writing is welcome, offers to beta are welcome, but telling me that the idea is stupid isn't helpful to anyone. This is the first fanfiction I've written in this fandom, or any for a few years so it does feel a little choppy to me.

Bill always knew that something was wrong with the twins when they were quiet. It wasn't in their natures to be calm or serious, and definitely not to be so quiet for more than a few minutes in a row. It made him suspicious and that was why he went to investigate. If something went wrong while their mother had left him in charge he knew he would never hear the end of it.

Arthur and Molly Weasley had taken Ron, Ginny, and Percy to Diagon Alley earlier in the day to look at owls. It was supposed to be Percy's reward for being chosen as a prefect at Hogwart's for the upcoming school year. The twins had decided that they would rather stay home with Bill, who was visiting. He had the suspicion that they were plotting something but so far no explosions or any other noise had come from the upper floors of the house. And it was making him uneasy after an hour of silence.

He made his way upstairs carefully, avoiding the steps that creaked underfoot. The twins shared a room, and their door was closed. It was still and when he was finally standing in front of their room he could barely making out the sound of pages turning. They were reading? Bill frowned, that didn't seem like them either unless it was a book about potions or spells to use in their pranks. He knocked on their doorframe and waited for a moment before opening the door slowly.

They were reading; Fred and George were sharing a small book between them where they were sitting hunched over on the bottom bunk of their bed. They looked up at him at the same time, startled.

"Is everything all right? You've been awfully quiet." Bill leaned back against the doorframe, crossing his arms over his chest, "Plotting something that I'm going to get in trouble for later?"

Almost as one they shook their heads and then look at each other for confirmation. They seemed nervous, and that made him uneasy. The twins never seemed anxious unless it was Christmas or their birthday. They gave each other another look before closing the book and holding it out to him. Bill took it from, stepping further into their room, "What is this?"

"Percy's journal." Fred, or at least that was who Bill thought it was, started, "We think you should read it."

He started to say something and George held up a hand to stop him, "You should read it. We were going to look for something to use later, but we've changed our plan."

"He thinks we hate him!" Fred seemed to be getting back some of his characteristic energy and he gestured sharply to the book Bill was holding, "We think that Mum and Dad should know about some of the things in there, we just didn't know how to tell them about it. Maybe if you read it you could tell them."

Bill's instincts were telling him to trust that whatever written in the journal was important, and that the twins were concerned about Percy, but he still had to ask, "Are you doing this to get Percy in trouble? He didn't write about breaking rules, or insult everyone, did he?"

George shook his head quickly, and then nodded, "He insulted someone a lot but not who you might think." He frowned and looked at Fred for a moment before staring up at Bill again; "There's something wrong with Percy, more than what we always thought was wrong with him."

Fred interrupted again, slapping his hand against the bottom of the top bunk, "He really thinks that we hate him. There are so many things in there..." He trailed off, looking toward the one window in the small room, "Mum and Dad should know."

Bill was still confused, "You want me to read Percy's journal because he is insulting someone and he thinks that you hate him, and there is something wrong with him?" He frowned again, glancing at the book, "All right, I can read some of it but if this is some sort of joke you will be apologizing to him later."

They both nodded, a determined expression crossing their faces. "We don't hate him, even if he is a prat."

"You're worried about him then?" He was having a difficult time with this; the twins being serious and asking for help, Percy's private diary that he was being told to read, and he was the one who was to tell their parents about their concerns. "Let me go read, and don't get into trouble. One problem at a time, please." He sighed and left their room, closing the door behind himself.

Going directly downstairs to the kitchen, he pulled his chair out again, setting the book on the table, and got a fresh cup of tea. Everyone should be returning soon and while he didn't want Percy to know that his journal was being passed around the family, Bill did want to know exactly when they arrived back at the Burrow.

There wasn't very much in the journal that was pleasant, and Bill was starting to wonder how he had missed so much of Percy's feelings. His younger brother certainly did know how to hide his thoughts well, and each entry seemed to illustrate that his emotions were no different. They were as misunderstood as most of Percy's statements recently. Since finding out that he would be a prefect the boy has been insufferable, reminding everyone of his new position repeatedly and constantly polishing the badge he would wear. It was annoying and even Bill was losing patience.

He hadn't recalled that no one other than their mum had congratulated his brother for being chosen, not even when they set out to get the owl had their father said anything about the honor. Bill knew that his father was proud of them all, but evidently Percy didn't know anything of the sort. It was as bad as Fred and George had made it sound; Percy did think that they hated him. He seemed to think that his whole family, with the exception of their mum, hated him. It was teenaged angst that he wouldn't have attributed to any of his siblings.

There were so many short entries with little thoughts, bits of emotional description, and finally Bill just skimmed through the book. It was nearly filled with writing and he had almost reached the end when his parents came through the Floo followed closely by Percy with the caged owl, and Ron and Ginny. They started dusting themselves off before they noticed him sitting there in the kitchen, and he took a moment to study Percy.

His brother moved stiffly, careful of the cage and the bird inside. His posture was perfect, his robes quickly brushed clean though they were patched and worn, and he seemed to be unguarded for only a moment before Bill saw his expression become blank. Everything that was written about in the journal was hidden so completely that Bill would never have guessed any of it from looking at Percy now.

Of course, now that he did know Bill was starting to feel the obligation to do something about Percy, or rather for him. It was his duty as the oldest brother to watch out for all of his siblings and he always taken that responsibility seriously. He felt as though he had failed Percy and he wanted to make it right again, but Bill wasn't sure how to do it yet. He could tell his parents and show them the journal, talk to his other siblings, or he could confront Percy directly and formulate his plan after finding out what Percy's reaction was.

Percy made his exit from the kitchen quickly, taking the owl with him after thanking their parents again and getting a hug from their mum. Ron and Ginny soon followed him up the stairs, arguing about something they had seen in Diagon Alley. Molly and Arthur both seemed to relax slightly, and they greeted Bill enthusiastically before each took up a new task; Molly starting lunch preparations and Arthur sitting at the table with Bill to read the Daily Prophet.

They sat together in comfortable silence for several minutes as Bill continued to read through Percy's journal and his father read the paper. It didn't take Molly very long to finish making lunch though and pretty soon she was calling the twins down to help set the tables outside, and asking Bill to assist her in carrying the food. He excused himself quickly, to hide the diary, and then went out to help. He tried to ignore the book all through lunch, but it seemed that Percy must have noticed something off about his room as he was quiet during the short meal and he kept giving the twins odd looks. Fred and George were returning each strange look, and were uncharacteristically quiet as well. It was unnerving and their parents were starting to pick up on the unhappy moods of their children.

He cleared his throat, getting everyone's attention before his mum could ask a piercing question about what had happened earlier in the day. "Percy, could I talk to you after lunch, in your room?" He smiled so everyone would relax, "I thought that I could tell you a little about being a prefect, what's expected of you and that sort of thing."

Percy nodded slowly, looking a little skeptical, "Certainly, I would appreciate any advice you could give me. I'd like to do my very best for the school." That seemed to be what everyone expected of them, and slowly the family finished the meal, in silence once again.

Bill helped get the dishes back into the kitchen and grabbed the diary again before heading up to Percy's room. His younger brother was already there, the door ajar, and Bill went in without knocking. He didn't bother to hide the journal and Percy's eyes went to it immediately. The reaction was swift, Percy's skin paling as he tried to stammer out a question. Bill could guess what it was.

"The twins gave it to me; and no they aren't planning on using it for anything." He took a deep breath and continued, "They were worried about you after they read some of it. That's why they gave it to me. And now I'm worried about you also, Percy. Is all of this true?" Bill didn't want to let go of the book; if he was going to talk to their parents about it things would be easier if he could show them what Percy had written. He had the feeling that if he gave the journal back to Percy it would be hidden, or maybe even destroyed. "Do you really feel this way?"

AN: Chapter two will be posted within a week (sooner if I can.)


	2. Chapter 2

Percy had not been happy with the way his summer holiday was going so far. He had been chosen to become one of Gryffindor's new Prefects and that was a good thing, but everything else seemed horrible when he had time to think about life. The twins were pulling pranks on him almost daily, mocking him at meals, and generally invading his peace and privacy. Bill hadn't said more than three words to him since arriving at the Burrow more than a week before. And Ron and Ginny were trying to spend as much time together as possible before Ron started his first year at Hogwart's in September so he didn't see very much of either of them.

The only person who seemed to have time for him was his mum, but she was often busy with the younger children. She had made a big fuss about his Hogwart's letter and badge when they arrived, and his father had actually smiled and promised a reward, but little had been said after that. Percy didn't want everyone to constantly fuss over him, but it would have been nice if someone other than his mum had been happy for him.

This day didn't seem to be any different, except for the trip to Diagon Alley to pick out an owl. He was surprised when his father had told him about the reward and he had thought for a long time about what sort of thing would be most useful at school. Finally settling on an owl wasn't so difficult as the animal would be very useful for years. He had never been terribly fond of Scabbers, but he was hesitant about accepting such a large gift from his parents when Ron was starting school this year; they would need all available funds for the four children getting school supplies and Percy felt a little guilty about getting the owl. He had brought that up with his mum, telling her that they should get a new pet for Ron, or a new wand instead of having the boy use Charlie's old one. The unicorn hair was almost poking through the tip and Ron would need a new wand soon if that was any indication. Molly Weasley wouldn't accept his arguments, she was determined that he was going to get something to mark his accomplishment and it would serve as an example for his younger siblings as well.

Percy hated being an example for his younger siblings. He never felt that anything he did was especially worthy of notice, and he knew that they resented the comparisons as well. He followed the rules, tried to fit into what his parents seemed to expect, and there really didn't seem to be anything special about that. He tried to make them proud and most of the time they didn't even notice. Didn't his father know that the main reason Percy wanted to work for the Ministry was that he wanted Arthur Weasley to notice him, and not his brothers, for a change?

He suffered through the trying shopping trip, thanked his parents properly and as soon as he could he disappeared into his own room with the owl. When he was alone he could finally relax, take a deep breath and cast aside the nicer robes for something comfortable.

Something didn't feel quite right in his room though, something seemed off. Percy thought for several long moments, trying to figure out what was wrong or if it were just imagination. He looked around the room, noting the position of everything and then stopping at the bookcase. There were two books out of order on the second shelf. His copy of Hogwarts: A History was in the wrong spot, and there was an empty place beside it. Exactly where his personal journal was usually kept. He could feel himself pale and without a second thought he knew who had the book; the twins would have the audacity to come into his room to take something, he knew they would. But what would they do with the information?

Percy sighed, rubbing his forehead briefly, and tried to think of something he could do to get the journal back with the least amount of humiliation. There was a lit of time for that though before he was called downstairs for lunch.

When the twins appeared he knew that he was right in his assumptions; they were giving him odd looks but were not teasing yet. He frowned at them as his parents chattered with his other siblings, and only Bill was able to break Percy's concentration. He found himself agreeing to talk to his older brother without even realizing what he was doing, and he didn't even know what Bill wanted to talk to him about. He shook his head, trying to concentrate and again failing to do more than stare at Fred and George.

He went up to his room again as soon as everyone was finished eating, and waited for Bill. The sudden urge to bolt overcame him; he didn't want to talk to Bill about being a prefect or anything else. His brother had barely had time for him when they were both living at home, and nothing had seemed to change while Bill had been home for his visit. And now he suddenly wanted to chat. It gave Percy another feeling of something being wrong, and it only intensified when Bill came into the bedroom carrying a book that Percy immediately recognized.

"What do you mean, do I really feel that way? I wouldn't have written it unless it were true." Percy willed himself to relax, and failed. "I want my journal back. They had no right to come in here and take it; you had no right to read it."

Bill sighed and gave him a look which only emphasized how different they were; Bill seemed to think that he was humoring a child. "It isn't that simple. If you really think that we hate you, or that you aren't wanted we have to talk about that. Unless you want me to take this to mum and dad right now?"

Percy's jaw clenched. "That isn't fair, it's my journal and it's personal. I can write whatever I want and this shouldn't even be an issue. I want my journal back right now and I don't want to talk about anything written inside." His voice rose slightly, and a hint of desperation entered it. Bill and the twins reading the book was one thing; they probably wouldn't take it as seriously or believe everything. Having his mother or father read his most personal thoughts and feelings was entirely different; if they confirmed any of his fears, confronted him about his anger, or just looked at him and tried to convince him that he was wrong, he wouldn't be able to handle it any longer.

"We have to talk about this. Percy, I don't understand any of this," Bill gestured with the book, "But if you really believe this I want to know why."

He snorted, "I believe it because it's the truth. I've known for years how the twins have felt about me and now Ron and Ginny seem to feel exactly the same. " Percy's voice dropped, "I just don't know why you would deny it now, you were the one who stopped writing to me last year, wasn't that supposed to be a clue?"

Continued (sooner this time).


End file.

Harry Potter, Angst, Drama