Harry Potter 1. Prologue

**Summary**: I'll warn you.  This involves main character death (no, not Harry), but they've been dead for a while.  Friends come back 5 years later to say goodbye.

**Disclaimer:**Again, not mine.  If they were, I'd be richer than the Queen of England.  Now, that would be nice.  Maybe then I could marry Prince William.  Or pay Prince Charles to borrow him for the night. evil laughter

**Author's Note:**Surprisingly angsty for me because I like happy stories, and it doesn't include music.  Also surprising.  But I got this idea when I was trying to sleep last night, and I like it.  This takes place 5 years after the defeat of Lord Voldemort (which was in 2004 for the story's sake).  I may be mixing them movies and the books sometimes, so purist please forgive me!!!  :-D  If these seem out of character, remember its 5 years and a lot of things have changed.  Also, I'm American, so I'm not even going to try to type British English.  If that bothers you, then don't read the story.  I had someone rip into another one and that was one of the reason they didn't like it.

_"[Memory is] a man's real possession...In nothing else is he rich, in nothing else is he poor." – Alexander Smith_

_"We rarely forget that which has made a deep impression on our minds." – Tyron Edwards_


	2. Toads & Body Binding Curses

Toads and Body Binding Curses

It's September 1st, 2008. It's the 5th September 1st since I last arrived at Hogwarts and the 5th one since the defeat of Lord Voldemort. It's also the 5th one I've spent in a graveyard, visiting one of my good friends. Hermione Granger. It's still painful to see the name of someone so young on a headstone. She'd be turning 25 in a few short weeks, but instead she's etched in stone as being 17.

September 1st is my day to visit her. We all have our own. We didn't tell each other our dates because they each have special memories, but we all know each others. I chose September 1st because it was the day I first met Hermione. Both of us were on our way to Hogwarts for the first time, but you never would have known it by looking at her. Although she was Muggle born, she knew more about magic than any First Year I've ever met. I was born into a magical family, and I didn't even know one spell. She may have been bossy, but she was nice. I lost Trevor, my toad, and she was the only person who tried to help me find him. Granted all she did was talk about magic, Hogwarts, and how she had already read all of our textbooks, but she took the time to talk to me unlike anyone else.

Even after she, Harry, and Ron became close friends, they were never mean to me like other students. Especially Hermione. After Malfoy put a Leg Binding Curse on me, Hermione was the one who removed it. And she's also the only one who didn't laugh. They all encouraged me to be strong and not let others upset me or rule my life. I remember I took their advice and stood up to them at the end of our first year, and Hermione put a Body Binding Curse on me. At least she told me she was sorry before performing it. She always helped me in Potions, even when Snape would dock Gryffindor points. I was not good at potions and I was afraid of Snape, which is a very bad combination

In 5th year when Voldemort returned to full power, it was Hermione that formed the D.A. It gave me a reason to practice real hard and become well-versed in Defense Against the Dark Arts. I would kill the people who tortured my parents with a Cruciatus Curse. Harry always partnered up with me, but then I would work with Ron and Hermione while Harry checked everyone else's progress. I always set my standard against Hermione. My goal was always to do it better or faster than her. She was the smartest person in our year, maybe even the whole school. I remember the first time I disarmed her before she disarmed me. I think everyone was shocked, but no one more so than myself. Neville Longbottom never beats Hermione Granger in anything. But Hermione always the nice person merely said, "Good job, Neville. Want to try again?" She didn't get upset and gloat when she won the next time. She always made me strive to be better.

Seventh year was the hardest on all of us, but no more so than Harry and her. Hermione was Head Girl at a time when everyone was terrified that Voldemort would attack any second. We knew our time was up, and we had to be ready. The original D.A. members taught anyone who wanted to learn all the curses and counter-curses they needed to know. Even Malfoy, who had realized that being a Death Eater was not what he wanted, had joined us. We were all constantly on edge, and it was Hermione's job to keep everyone calmed and focused on school. One night shortly before Voldemort laid siege on Hogwarts, I was walking around the corridor because I couldn't sleep. I knew we were as ready as we could be, but I was still scared to death. Hermione was coming out of a meeting with Professor McGonagall, who was acting in place of Dumbledore who had been severely injured in fight with Voldemort a week before.

"Neville, what are you doing up?" she asked me, taking my arm as we headed back to the Gryffindor Common Room.

"I'm terrified, Hermione," I said, shaking my head. I never had any reason to pretend to be brave in front of her. "I'm afraid that we're not prepared enough, although I know we are. I'm afraid we're going to lose innocent people. I'm afraid we're all going to die without taking Voldemort down. But most of all, I'm afraid of losing myself to Voldemort and doing something horrible, like killing one of you. I don't have a strong mind like my parents or Harry or you. He could manipulate me."

"Neville, look at me," she said, making me face her. "Mark Twain, a Muggle writer once said, 'Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.' It's okay to be afraid, but don't let it rule you in the end. I believe that whatever happens, it happens for a reason. If I die to save someone else's life and we win in the end, then okay. I don't want to die, and I'm so afraid of all this. But, I'm working with my fear. I'm letting it make me stronger. I know good triumphs over evil, and I know we'll win."

If Hermione could say that and mean it, which I knew she did, then it was time for me to believe that, too. I measure myself against Hermione, and it was my turn to strive for the limits. Now, I wonder if Hermione knew what was going to happen. That it was her giving up her life that saved us all, but I knew she was okay with that. Anyway, the particulars of that story are not mine to give. I believe that belongs to the person whose life she saved.

So, I find myself here four and a half years later, finally ready to say goodbye to a dear friend. The first person I met on my way to Hogwarts, the girl so self-assured that she rarely let things get to her, the bravest one out of all of us, the girl who gave up her life to save us all.

"Hey Hermione," I say, placing the lavender heathers on the ground. "I know I haven't talked to you the other times I've visited. It's hard because I can still hear your voice. It's been almost four and a half years, but I can still recall our conversation that night like it was yesterday. You know, I never really let you go that night? I know you said you were ready to die for good, but I don't think any of us were ready to let you go. Why did you do that? You were the strongest of us. You should have been the one to live! We needed you!"

I kneel on the ground and break down in tears. It takes me a few minutes to regain a sense of calm.

"But you did it. You were the strongest one, the one ready to sacrifice your life so we'd win. I couldn't let you go, though. I always measure myself against you, had your friendship; how was I supposed to function without it?"

I breathe deeply before continuing. "It was hard, but I've made it. I know this may not be as hard on me as maybe Harry, Ron, or Ginny, but losing you impacted my life in its own way. I've tried to be more like you. I've actually become pretty good at potions and very good at Defense Against the Dark Arts. In fact, McGonagall offered me the teaching position open for DADA immediately after graduation. Who would have thought of me as a teacher 12 years ago when we walked into Hogwarts and were sorted? I couldn't stay, though, too many memories. But I made it. I became a Hogwarts teacher. And I have you to thank. You pushed me never to give up and that I could succeed in whatever I truly wanted."

I stand and dust off my knees, the sun glinting against my wedding ring. "Do you remember Lavender Brown? Well, we met up again two years ago and got married last year. We had a daughter in August. I hope you don't mind, but we named her Hermione. Hopefully she'll go to Hogwarts. Maybe she can change some lives like I know you changed all of ours."

I look at the lavender heathers wrapped with a gold ribbon that has a toad and wand replica attached to it. "Goodbye, Hermione, and thank you. I'll always remember you. I'll see you next year. Maybe I'll bring little Hermione with me."

As I begin to walk away, the cloudy day turns bright and sunshiny, and I know Hermione's smiling down on me.

**So, what do you think? Any good? Lavender heathers symbolize admiration, which is why I chose them.  is a place to find a picture of what heathers look like. **


	3. Trolls and Fights and Love

**AN: I suddenly got inspired to write this. Don't ask why after such a long absence, but I think re-reading all the books might have had something to do with it. I started this before the 6th book, so it definitely doesn't include anything in there.**

October 31, 2008. My turn. Only Harry really understands why I chose today of all days. The day I first cast the flying charm correctly. All thanks to Hermione Granger. It was her fault I had to use it in the first place, but as Harry still reminds me to this day, Hermione would not have been in the bathroom if it weren't for me.

That day will forever be burned into my memory because that is the day that Hermione, Harry, and I first became friends. Hermione always believed in me, even when it seemed like she was patronizing me. She knew just how to make me rise to a challenge, and that way was to piss me off. She was such a show-off, but never more so than in that first year. Looking back, I know it was her nerves. I didn't know that then, though. I just thought she was a snobby know-it-all. I was really mad that she had shown me up in front of Flitwick, and of course I had to mock her in front of my friends. Bloody hell, I was 11 years old; what do you expect?

I can't say I wouldn't have said it if I had known she was behind me because, at the time, I was really angry at her. When we found out about the troll and Harry told me we had to warn Hermione, I didn't really want to. Trolls were just about the scariest things I could imagine at the time. But, it was my fault she was in the bathroom crying, so I went with Harry to get her.

I never would have imagined the great Hermione Granger, brightest student in our year, would be cowering under the sinks once the troll busted in. But she was, and we couldn't coax her out. Harry, being the brave yet stupid prat he still is today, jumped on the trolls back to get its attention from Hermione, but she still didn't run. Harry lost his wand to the troll's nose, so I had to take my chance. One spell, _Wingardium Leviosa, _was the only one I vaguely knew how to do. I look at Hermione, and she mimicked the wand movement. I copied her, and for the first time, I said the spell correctly. I knocked the troll out with his own club.

To top things off, Hermione covered for me and Harry going after her. She said **SHE **wanted to take on the troll, and we were trying to stop her. Hermione, the teacher's pet, lied. I couldn't believe that. And that was the day that Harry, Hermione, and I became the inseparable three.

Hermione and I had an interesting relationship, constantly fighting and egging each other on. I know for a fact we pissed off Harry more than once because of the constant bickering. Aside from the incident with Crookshank and Scabbers, we were never **REALLY** angry at each other. Our temperaments are so different that of course we were going to clash.

There were sometimes, though, that showed we were a lot more similar than we thought. I remember the day she punched Malfoy in our 3rd year when he was going on about his dad getting Hagrid fired. I never thought she would do that, seeing as she was always warning Harry and me to restrain ourselves when it came to Malfoy. I was so proud of her for that punch – a solid right hook. And then there was the day she told off Professor Trelawney and quit Divinations. Come to think of it, our Third Year was a good one for our relationship. We had some of our highest highs and lowest lows, but we were still friends at the end.

Hermione came up with idea for the DA; something, I believe, saved us all. It was such a brilliant idea, even though Harry didn't like it at first. Harry never liked being the center of attention, but he couldn't avoid it. Hermione found a way to put it to good use, and for once, she conceded that someone else was better than her at something – Defense Against the Dark Arts. It might seem minor, but it was quite a big deal for Hermione to admit that. But, she always wanted to help others to the best of her ability. She would do what she could, but she always kept a level head. Harry and I…well, Harry and I were never much good at thinking about consequences and looking at other options. We were gut reactors, and she used her head.

Anyway, Hermione's idea helped so many students live and save the lives of others. I don't think she realized how valuable her idea was. To her, it was just a chance to teach people what they wanted to know and what, she felt, they needed to know.

Seventh Year was probably the worst year of our lives. I can't even name everyone I lost that year. My father, Percy, Dean, Lupin, and Mad Eye Moody are just a few. And that lot was before Voldemort's siege. No students but Harry, Hermione, and me really knew what to expect, and even we were a little unsure. Dumbledore was out of commission, and McGonagall was working her arse off to keep the students focused on something other than the imminent attack. Hermione helped with that, but Hermione was the biggest help to Harry and me. Both of us were in shock from losing so many people close to us. Lupin was the closest thing Harry had left to his parents, and I had already lost my father and my brother. We were wavering, and we were getting anxious for a fight. At that point, neither one of us cared if we died as long as we took down Voldemort and as many Death Eaters as we could manage. We were reacting with our guts – again.

It took Hermione sitting us down and forcing us to listen to her that really broke that mindset.

"We **HAVE** to talk," Hermione said, dragging both me and Harry into an abandoned classroom. "I know your both upset, and you have a right to be. We've seen too many people we know and care about die at the hands of Voldemort, but your attitude has got to change. Your willingness to die is going to get you killed before you can kill him!"

"What are you talking about, Hermione?" I said, getting off the table I'd been sitting on. "The only way to fight someone who kills is to be unafraid to die. That's what we are – unafraid to die."

"Liar! There's a difference between being unafraid to die and being willing to die. Being unafraid means you're accepting the chance that death might happen, and you're willing to take that chance. I am unafraid to die. You guys are acting like sacrificial lambs, and that's not the way to beat Voldemort!"

"Don't go calling us liars. You don't know what's going on in my head!"

"Look, I don't need to be here. I'm fine," Harry said, finally entering the conversation.

"You can leave, Harry James Potter, but don't believe for one second we're finished here," Hermione said as Harry walked out of the room. She turned to me with that patented Granger glare. "Back to you, Ronald Weasley. You don't think I know?"

"You haven't lost your brother and your father at the hands of this…bastard!" I said, getting right in her face.

"You're 100 right. I haven't," she said, taking a step back and sitting on a table. "But I have lost friends and people I consider family, like your father, to him. Your anger is clouding your judgment, and you'll need that judgment to win. Voldemort thrives on anger and hate. Remember what Dumbledore always told Harry – love is the key. Love! Not anger or hate! Anger and hate are Voldemort's tools, and we can't beat him with those. We can only beat him if we believe in love. The love we have for our friends and family that are still alive, the love that has us wanting to protect them. The love we have for our friends and family that are dead, the love that has us wanting to avenge and remember them. The love we have for the people we haven't met yet; your future wife's out there somewhere, Ron. Don't you want to meet her?" Hermione laughs, causing me to laugh also and sit down next to her. She sobers up and takes my hand before continuing, "And the love we have for each other – the inseparable three. We love each other, and we trust each other more than anyone else left. And that's our key. You have to remember the love because that's the only way we'll have a chance!" And then she gave me a hug as I started to cry. I let out all my anger, frustration, and hurt out that night. My willingness to die became a fearlessness of dying that night. Now, I can't say that when I saw Voldemort and the Death Eaters, I didn't feel any anger. But because of Hermione, my mind was clear enough to focus on the fight. And we made it out okay – well, mostly.

So I'm back here today at Hermione's grave to fill her in on what's happened in the last year since I saw her.

"Hey 'Mione," I say, placing the bouquet of Daisies and Angelica herb on the ground. "It's weird to see the grass growing completely over your grave because it really seems like just yesterday we were burying you here. It's been a long year. Ginny got engaged to that bloke – Michael. I've told you about him, and I'm sure Ginny has, too. She'll probably tell you all the details when she comes to visit you. I'm still trying to find the right girl. Harry says I'll have to settle because I'm too much to handle, but you told me I'd find somebody. I believe you. She's out there somewhere. How about you use some of your powers up there and send her my way? I'm not getting any younger." I laugh, knowing that Hermione is probably laughing at me and not with me right now, wherever she is.

"Anyway, I wish you could see Neville and Lavender's daughter. I can see her being a lot like you. That's one weird couple. Almost as weird as if you and I had got together, but that never would have happened. You were always like a sister to me, no matter what happened. I think we fought so fiercely because we loved each other just as much. Only the people that love you can hurt you, and we managed to hurt each other a few times.

I miss you a lot, especially today. I miss our friendship, and I miss the fact you were the girl I could go to about almost anything. I know you're taking care of yourself, and I know you're looking down on us all the time. We wouldn't be here without you. But, most importantly, I wouldn't be here without you. I probably would have died along side you; Harry probably would have, too. So, thank you."

"I love you, _sis_," I say with a smile, kissing my fingers and placing them on her headstone. "I'll see you next year."

I stand up, feeling much better after talking to Hermione. I always do because I know that she's still listening wherever she is.

**AN** **2: Angelica symbolizes inspiration, and daffodils symbolize respect. I think those 2 flowers really embody Ron's feelings towards Hermione.**


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Harry Potter, Angst