Downton Abbey 1. Chapter 1

Further Down the Line

"Good morning my lady. How are you this morning," Anna said as she entered the room with Lady Mary's breakfast tray.

"I am very good this morning Anna. Very, very good indeed," Mary replied with a smile, remembering a particularly nice morning with Matthew before he had to leave. "And you Anna?"

"I will be better when I hear from Mr. Bates."

"He will write soon. I am certain of it," Mary responded.

"I hope you are right my lady," Anna said as she lifted the lid from Mary's breakfast tray. The lid had only been up for a moment before Mary covered her mouth and was clearly fighting nausea.

"Anna, those eggs must have gone bad," Mary said as the vile smell assaulted her. Anna's raised her eyebrows but quickly replaced the lid back on the plate. Mary instantly felt better when the smell was gone, but she was shaken by Anna's lack of response to a truly terrible smell. "You smell it too, don't you?"

"No my lady. They smell the same as they always do."

"No I am certain they smell as if they have gone bad. Please just bring me some tea and toast - that smell has made me loose my appetite."

"Right away my lady," Anna replied, leaving Mary alone with her thoughts. Those eggs reeked - she was absolutely sure of it. With a smell that bad, how could Anna not have noticed? She was still pondering it when Anna returned with her new tray.

"Is this the first morning you have felt sick my lady?"

"I am not sick. I was only reacting to the smell of food that had clearly gone bad."

"Yes of course," Anna said but there was something in her voice that made Mary curious.

"Why do you ask?"

"No reason."

"You must have had a reason for asking. I insist that you tell me."

"Well my lady, I have not had to replenish the supplies for your monthly cycle since you returned from your honeymoon and that has been three months ago."

"You know I have never been regular before. I have missed consecutive months before. More than three even."

"Yes, but you have never had a possible alternative reason for missing it before."

"I am not pregnant. Those eggs were bad," Mary insisted. She couldn't be pregnant yet, could she? Did she even want to be? Certainly she wanted children at some point - they needed an heir after all - but it had taken nearly a decade for her and Matthew to finally marry and she was not at all sure she was keen on adding a baby to the mix so soon. "I am not pregnant," she insisted again as if repeating it would make it true.

"Of course Lady Mary."

"I am not, but just to be sure, I shall go see Doctor Clarkson."

She dressed quickly with Anna's assistance and then headed downstairs to request that the car be brought around. She left word with Carson to tell her mother that she was going to town to see the doctor but not to worry as it was nothing serious.

"If you will come this way, Doctor Clarkson will see you now," the nurse told her shortly after she arrived at the hospital.

"Lady Mary, what can I do for you?" the doctor asked with a smile.

"I was hoping you could tell me whether or not I am pregnant."

"I see. When was your last monthly?"

"Nearly three months ago, but I have never been regular. I have gone three months without one several times before."

"Normally if a woman has gone three months without a cycle, I would say she was almost certainly with child, but if this is a common occurrence for you, perhaps you are not. Have you been excessively tired?"

"I may be slightly more tired than usual," she replied but she was certain that was only because she wasn't getting as much sleep as she had before Matthew started sharing her bed.

"Any nausea in the mornings?"

"Only this morning and only because the wretched eggs had gone bad and smelled so terrible."

"Many pregnant women develop aversions to certain smells," he informed her.

"I have had eggs twice this week already. It was only this morning that I felt nauseous, and I am certain they had a rotten smell about them," she insisted even though Anna couldn't smell it. "Isn't there some test you can do?"

"I am afraid not. Missed cycles are the main indicator. Symptoms like fatigue and nausea usually confirm it, but you can only be certain when your stomach begins to expand and you feel the child move. That could take several months if indeed you are in the very early stages of pregnancy."

"So I must simply go home and wait to see if I get fat and am kicked from the inside?" Mary said irritably, finding herself wondering if Clarkson knew what he was talking about. It was 1920 after all. You would think there would be better ways to diagnose a pregnancy rather than simply wait and see.

"If your sickness in the morning continues, I would say you are likely with child."

"I see. Well please do not mention that we have spoken about this. If anyone asks, I was here for my hay fever. I wouldn't want to raise any false hopes," Mary said. She certainly didn't want to have her granny and papa focused on the idea of an heir already.

"Of course. If you have any questions, please call on me at any time."

When Mary returned home, she was still thinking about her visit with the doctor. She wasn't at all sure how she felt about the possibility of being pregnant. She knew she should be pleased and a part of her knew she would be if she could produce an heir so quickly, but she was not sure what kind of a mother she would be. Cold and calculated Richard had called her - not the qualities one looked for in a mother. She also wondered if she might be too selfish to be a mother for even now she was not sure she would like to share Matthew with a child right away. It might be wrong but she wanted him to herself for a little while.

"My lady, the fabric samples you ordered arrived while you were out. I had them placed in the nursery for you," Anna told her when she met her in the hall way.

"Thank you Anna. I will go have a look."

Her mind was still considering the possibility of pregnancy and was making it hard to focus. Twice she dropped bolts of fabrics and once she stubbed her toe causing her to yell out in pain.

"I thought I heard something in here," her mother said from the doorway.

"I stubbed my toe," she explained as she continued to look through the fabrics.

"What are you doing in the old nursery?"

"I was thinking of redecorating," she replied absent-mindedly.

"I heard you went to the doctor this morning. I presume all is well?"

"Of course. I am perfectly well," she said with a smile hoping her mother wouldn't ask any further questions.

"All right then, I am leaving for tea at Dower House."

"If you happen to see Matthew, will you send him up? I need to speak with him about something," Mary said without looking up at her mother.

"Of course," Cora said, barely concealing her grin. Cora was sure that the fact that Mary had visited the doctor, was smiling and perfectly well, was talking about redecorating the nursery and wanted Matthew to come to that very room could mean only one thing - she was pregnant. She tried to contain her excitement and she hurried to locate her son-in-law.

"Oh Carson, have you seen Matthew?" she asked in a rush when she saw Carson in the hall.

"He is in the library reviewing the accounts."

"Thank you," Cora replied and hurried to the library.

"Matthew, Mary would like to see you upstairs," she blurted out as soon as she entered the room.

"Is it urgent? I am in the middle of reviewing some complex accounting," he replied.

"I think what she has to tell you is something you will very much want to hear."

"Are you sure it can't wait even an hour?" Matthew said. He had been hard at work at these books for hours and was just beginning to see where some of the problems were coming from.

"Matthew, she has just come from the doctor, and she would like to see you in the nursery which she is considering redecorating," Cora said smile she could not conceal.

"You mean to say she is…"

"I didn't say anything. Only that she has just come from the doctor and would now like to see you in the nursery. You may draw what conclusions you will, but I do not think you will want to keep her waiting," she said with a smile that told him his guess must be true.

Account books forgotten, he stood and hurried up the stairs to find his wife. Only when he reached the landing did he realize he did not even know where the nursery was. Luckily Anna was walking down the hall and was able to point him in the correct direction. He purposefully slowed his steps as he approached the room and took a deep, calming breath. He needed to be calm for Mary.

"Cora said you wanted to see me," he said, trying to look as calm as possible but still sounding a bit out of breath.

"Yes, I've stolen the nursery as a sitting room for us, and this is the paper - unless you hate it."

He couldn't help the puzzled look that came over his face. Converting the nursery to a sitting room? That was not at all how he expected this conversation to go.

"Oh," he said, trying to hide the disappointment from his voice. "Is that all?"

"Why? What did you think it was?" she asked, looking at the fabrics rather than him and hoping he hadn't noticed anything that might lead him to guess what she had been thinking about all morning since those horrid eggs were presented to her.

"Cora said you'd been to the doctor earlier. I wondered why," he replied cautiously, but still hopefully. It quickly dawned on her that her mother had probably given Matthew the impression that she was pregnant and that he very much hope it were true.

"To find something for my hay fever," she said nonchalantly, hoping he would leave the issue alone.

"What will we use for a day nursery, should the need arises" he asked, moving in much closer to her.

"I think we can worry about that a little further down the line." Whether further down the line was only a few months away was yet to be seen, but she had seen the hopeful look on his face and did not want raise his hopes even further when she very likely was not even pregnant. But it might not be so bad to have a baby she decided when she saw the longing glances he had given her. Yes, a baby with his wonderful blue eyes wouldn't be so bad at all, and with a secret smile and lightest touch of her stomach, she finally admitted to herself that it might not be all that much further down the line after all.


	2. Chapter 2

Further Down the Line Chapter 2

Anna returned to the kitchen with Lady Mary's uneaten breakfast tray. "Just some toast and tea again Mrs. Patmore," Anna said as she set the tray down on the counter.

"That is the fourth time this week that girl has returned her breakfast tray for toast and tea," Mrs. Patmore replied, the irritation clear in her voice.

"Why did she return it?" Daisy asked as she began preparing the requested toast.

"She said the eggs don't smell right," Anna said with a shrug, not wanting to cause more people to share her suspicion about why Lady Mary could no longer handle the smell of eggs.

"But they smell like they always do," Daisy said, sniffing the eggs to confirm.

"Well we all know Queen Mary likes to find fault with everything," Mrs. Patmore said.

"I assume you are not speaking of Lady Mary," Carson said from the doorway, the disapproval clear in his voice.

"I am sorry Mr. Carson, but Lady Mary has sent her breakfast back four days in a row saying she wants only toast and tea."

"If that is what she wants, then I suggest you see to it," Carson replied in a voice that did not allow for questions.

When Anna retuned to Mary's room with the tea and toast, Mary was just emerging from the bathroom, her face nearly white.

"Anna, I am afraid I was sick in the bathroom. Can you please find something to mask the smell," she asked. She did not want Matthew to return to the room and notice that she had been ill. This was the first time the nausea was so bad that she could not resist the urge to empty her stomach in the bathroom. She was extremely thankful that Matthew had already gone down to breakfast and was not here to observe her being sick.

"Of course my lady. This is the fourth morning in a row..."

"Well if the kitchen would just stop sending me those damn eggs," Mary said, but that excuse sounded hollow even to her ears. She was well aware of the fact that she had been sick four mornings in a row and was now fairly certain that she actually was pregnant.

She wasn't sure what to do about it or who she should talk to. She considered her mother, but didn't think she could stand her American brand of excitement. She thought perhaps Isobel because of her medical training, but she could not bear the idea of talking about something so intimate with Matthew's mother. Papa was simply out of the question and for that matter so was Edith. Granny would just go on about an heir and that she was not ready to deal with. She certainly could not tell Matthew yet for fear that she might be wrong. She thought perhaps she might talk with Sybil who had arrived last night, but it was clear that Sybil and Tom needed some time alone in light of all that had happened. So Mary was left to her own thoughts and worries.

"Can I get you anything else?"

"No, just help me dress. If I linger too long, Matthew may come back up, and I do not want him aware of the fact that I was sick this morning."

"Mary dear, you look pale," Violet said when Mary entered the sitting room where her grandmother, mama, Edith, and Sybil were already gathered.

"Do I? It must be the heat," she said with a shrug. Her mother looked skeptical but did not say anything. All morning Mary had trouble keeping her eyes away from Sybil's pregnant belly. She was having a very difficult time imagining that her slender figure might soon resemble Sybil's. Sybil did not look at all comfortable either. She was constantly shifting, as if she could not find a position that allowed her any relief.

"Sybil, I would swear I just saw your stomach move," Edith said.

"It does that when the baby kicks particularly hard. It gave Tom quite the shock the first time he felt it."

"May I feel it?" Edith asked.

"Of course," Sybil replied, taking her sister's hand and placing it on her belly. "It sometimes takes a few moments, but if you press firmly, the baby usually kicks back." At that, Cora knelt by Sybil and pressed on her belly until she too felt the baby kick.

"Mary, you can feel it too if you'd like," Sybil offered.

"Really Sybil, I am not sure that is necessary." Mary was supremely uncomfortable with the idea of coming so close to what could very well be her in a few months.

"Oh Mary, it is fine. In fact, I want you to. It is an amazing feeling."

"Oh very well," Mary replied as she sat next to Sybil and carefully placed her hand against her sister's stomach.

"You can press harder. It won't hurt me."

Mary was shocked when she felt the kick, it was much stronger than she anticipated. "What does it feel like for you?"

"At first, I wasn't sure what I was feeling. It was faint, like a flutter. But it has gotten stronger as the weeks have gone on. Sometimes it hurts, but mostly it is comforting. I know the baby is fine when it moves. If it is still too long, I sometimes try to make it move." Mary allowed her hand to linger there, wondering what it might be like to feel the kicks from the inside rather than the outside.

The rest of the morning passed quickly and Mary spent the early afternoon riding to clear her head. After a vigorous ride on Diamond, she found she could barely keep her eyes open. She wasn't sure if she should blame the fatigue on the ride or the other possibility. Regardless of the cause, she opted to take a nap until the dressing gong rang.

Matthew had spent the day working and arrived home just as the family was dressing for dinner. He was surprised to enter the bedroom only to find Mary fast asleep on the bed, her knees drawn up to her chest. He had never seen her sleep during the day and wondered if perhaps she had fallen ill. He gently placed his hand against her forehead to check for a fever and was relieved to discover that her temperature seemed normal.

"Darling," he said as he gently shook her arm. "It is time to dress for dinner."

"Has the gong rang?" she asked sleepily, rubbing her eyes to try to wake up.

"About ten minutes ago. Are you feeling alright?"

"Yes of course. I was just tired," she said as she rose. The quick movement caused her to feel lightheaded and dizzy so she grabbed hold of his arm to steady herself.

"Are you sure you are alright? You don't look well," he said, the worry plain in his voice.

"That is exactly every new wife wants to hear from her husband," she said, rolling her eyes as she walked to her vanity and rang for Anna to assist her.

"Mary, you know that is not what I meant. I am only worried about you."

"Well you should find something else to worry about because I am fine. Perhaps you can worry about making yourself presentable for dinner" she said dismissively. Even in her head it sounded mean, but she was not sure how respond to his inquiries. By the time she decided that she should apologize, he had already retreated to his dressing room and Anna was there to help her dress. When she was ready, she thought about simply walking down to the dining room without him, but she had a nagging feeling that she really should apologize. Having made the decision, she walked over and opened the door to his dressing room to see him standing on the other side looking as if he was debating coming back into their room.

"I am sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. You did not deserve it."

"I just worry about you. You have looked pale these last few days, and I have never known you to sleep in the middle of the day"

"I know you worry, but I am fine - truly I am. I just haven't felt like myself lately."

"How so?"

"I can't really explain. Let's go down to dinner and we can talk about it later. We are late already."

He wanted to remind her that he was her husband and demand that she explain, but he had learned that demands never worked well with Mary so he silently offered her his arm.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: I meant this to be a one-shot, but a few readers asked me to continue it and so I have. Please let me know if you are still enjoying it and would like me to continue.

Further Down the Line Chapter 3

Mary found herself seated next to Sybil at dinner. For once, she was pleased that Matthew was not seated next to her as she did not want him observing her too carefully tonight. Although she did not feel violently ill like she had in the morning, Mary still did not have any appetite and felt rather like she was on a boat that was constantly shifting beneath her. She managed to eat a little during the first course and pushed the rest of the food around on her plate to make it appear that she had eaten more than she actually had. She knew that Matthew would be watching like a hawk even from his place across the table and she did not want to give him additional cause to question her.

Matthew was not fooled by Mary's little ploy. He was certain that she had eaten no more than three or four bites and was merely moving the rest of her food around. His concern for her well being was mounting.

When the second course arrived, Mary was careful to serve herself only a small portion of the fish offered by Carson. Alfred followed behind Carson and before she could stop him, he ladled Hollandaise sauce over her fish. She immediately felt the nausea that had become all to familiar in the past few days. She tried a few deep breaths in an attempt to fight back the urge to be sick, but it proved to be of no avail. "Please excuse me, I don't feel well," she said as she rose and rushed from the room with her hand over her mouth just in case.

Matthew quickly stood to follow her, but Sybil stood at the same time and laid a hand on his arm. "Please let me," she said.

He nodded and sat back down, thinking that Mary would likely be more comfortable allowing Sybil to tend to her since she seemed so adverse to the idea of allowing him to care for her at this time. Knowing that still did not make it any easier as he could not help but remember the last time a woman he cared for had left the dinning room after saying that she did not feel well.

Sybil found Mary in the nearest bathroom on her knees gripping the sides of the toilet as she vomited. Sybil quickly stepped back into the hallway to see Anna lingering there with a worried look on her face.

"Is this the first time?" Sybil asked. Anna looked uncomfortable and did not answer. "It is okay Anna. I need to know so I can help her, and whatever you tell me won't go any further."

"She has been sick every morning for the past four mornings."

"I see. Please fetch a glass of water and a cool cloth. Make sure the fire in her room is well lit and that her bed is turned down."

"Right away my lady."

Sybil re-entered the bathroom to find Mary still clutching the toilet but no longer in the process of being sick. "It was the smell of the Hollandaise wasn't it?"

"How did you know," Mary asked, lifting her head to meet Sybil's eyes.

"When I first became pregnant I could not handle the smell of eggs for months, fish was even worse, and Heaven help me if I smelled cheese."

"But I'm not…"

"Oh Mary dear, I am almost certain you are. You have looked so pale and tired. Anna says you have been you have been sick for days - no don't blame her, I forced her to tell. When did you have your last cycle?"

"Three months ago, on my honeymoon, but I have never been regular. Doctor Clarkson said he could not be sure that I was pregnant."

"Well take it from a nurse and a pregnant woman, you my dear sister, are pregnant." Mary swallowed hard but in truth was not surprised by Sybil's conclusion.

"You don't seem to have any of the symptoms I am experiencing."

"Not now, but I did in the beginning. It will pass in a few weeks - I promise."

Anna arrived and offered Mary the water and cloth to wipe her face. Mary gratefully took the items offered and gulped down the water.

"Now, Anna and I are going to help you to your room. You need to sleep - it is very important in the beginning." Mary nodded and allowed Anna and Sybil help her to her feet. Once in her room, she allowed Anna to dress her in a nightgown and braid her hair before climbing into bed. "Sybil, please don't say anything. Tell them I have the flu. Wait no not the flu - that will upset Matthew too much. Just say it is a minor stomach ailment."

"Of course. It is your secret to share in your own time," Sybil said with a soft smile as she turned out the lights and pulled the door closed.

"How is she?" Matthew asked as soon as Sybil returned to the dinning room.

"She is sleeping now. She will be just fine."

"Are you certain? It could be the flu. Perhaps we should call Dr. Clarkson."

"Matthew, I can assure you that she will be just fine. She ate something that disagreed with her. It is as simple as that. There is nothing that Dr. Clarkson can do for her."

"You are certain it is not the flu?" he asked, giving voice to his deepest fear.

"No, it is not the flu. She has no fever, no chills. Her stomach is simply upset. Rest is the best thing for her."

Matthew took some comfort in Sybil's words, but he knew would not feel calm until he checked on Mary himself. He forced himself to remain in his seat through the rest of dinner service, but excused himself as soon as the last plate was removed. He hurried to their room to check on Mary. He was relieved to find her sleeping peacefully. He felt her forehead to confirm Sybil's words and thankfully found no trace of fever. He quickly changed into his pajamas and climbed into bed with her. He pulled her in to his arms, trying his best not to wake her but needing the feel of her against his skin to reassure him that she was indeed well.

"Matthew," he heard her murmur when she felt his touch.

"Shhh darling. I am here. Go back to sleep," he said, kissing the top of her head.

"I am so sorry I ruined dinner."

"Don't be. It was my fault really. I knew you weren't feeling well and should have insisted that you did not go down for dinner."

"Don't blame yourself. I would not have listened, even if you had insisted - especially if you had insisted" she said and he could feel her smile against his chest.

"No my stubborn girl, you probably wouldn't have listened," he admitted. "Are you feeling any better?"

"Much better, just tired."

"You just go to sleep then. We can talk in the morning."

"You need not stay with me. You can't be tired yet. It is hours before we normally sleep. You can go back and visit with everyone or play billiards with Tom or …."

"Mary, you don't feel well. I am staying with you, and that is the end of the discussion." He expected her to fight him on this, but was pleased when she pressed a quick kiss to his lips and laid her head back against his chest and quickly drifted off.


	4. Chapter 4

Further Down the Line Ch 4

The first thing Mary noticed upon waking was that Matthew was still in the bed with her, and he appeared to be sound asleep. She smiled at the sight of his normally immaculate hair sticking out in all directions and reached up to smooth it back down. Although it was the weekend, he still usually rose before her, but she supposed his worrying may have kept him up late.

Her stomach was bothering her again, but she was trying her best to fight back against the nausea. She tried deep breaths but that did not help. She tried closing her eyes, but again that did not help. Before long, she knew she needed to make it to the bathroom very quickly or she would risk being sick on their bed.

As carefully as she could, she tried to wiggle free from Matthew's sleeping arms, hoping against hope that she would not wake him. She hurried from the bed to the bathroom and was soon emptying her stomach yet again. Moments later, she felt Matthew kneel beside her,holding her hair back and gently rubbing her back.

"Please just go. I don't want you to see me like this," she said weakly.

"You have seen me much worse and stayed. Let me help you." Before she could protest further, she became violently sick again. Matthew continued to gently rub her back until she finally finished. When she finally finished, she slumped back against him, closing her eyes and praying that it was over for the morning. Matthew reached up to pull the chord that would call Anna as he held Mary against him whispering soothing words to her.

After a few minutes, her breathing seemed to calm and she allowed herself to open her eyes. "Would you like me to carry you back to bed?" he asked. She nodded and he carefully lifted her up and carried her back to bed. He then returned to the bathroom and dampened a cloth. He returned to the bedroom and carefully wiped her face.

Anna entered the room to see Mary as pale as a sheet and Matthew offering Mary a glass of water. She could tell by the scene and the concern on Matthew's face that Mary had been sick once again.

"Anna, please get Lady Mary pot of tea. Then have Mr. Carson call Dr. Clarkson and ask him to come as soon as possible to examine Lady Mary," Matthew directed.

"Just the tea Anna. I have no need of Dr. Clarkson," Mary countered.

"Please see to both of my requests Anna," Matthew said firmly.

"Just the tea Anna," Mary responded just as firmly, frowning at her husband. "She is my lady's maid. I give her directives, not you. You may go Anna."

"Very well, I will call Dr. Clarkson myself."

"No, I do not wish to see a doctor."

"You are clearly unwell. I am sorry you do not wish to see a doctor, but I am going to have to insist. This could be serious. For God's sake Mary, it could be the Spanish Flu and I am not willing to risk your health simply because you do not wish to see a doctor!"

"It is not the Spanish flu," she replied, raising her voice and rising from the bed.

"Well is is not hay fever," he replied, his voice rising in response to hers as he grabbed the door knob.

"For God sake Matthew, I'm not ill - I'm pregnant."

His hand immediately released the door knob as he turned to look at her in disbelief. "You're what?"

"I'm pregnant, or at least I think I am," she said, much softer this time. He was across the room and lifting her into his arms before she had finished her sentence. He almost spun her around as he had when he proposed, but thought better of it when he remembered how sick she had been this morning. That thought brought him back down to Earth as he carefully sat her on the bed.

"So all this is from being pregnant? Is that normal?"

"Sybil says it is."

"I still think we should call Dr. Clarkson. We can't take any chances with your heath."

"I've already seen him," she confessed. "I did not go see him for my hay fever. I went to see if I was pregnant. He was unable to confirm it and said I simply needed to wait and see. I doubt he will have anything more to add only a week later."

"Please humor me on this Mary."

"Oh very well. But I do not want him coming here, that will just raise suspicion among the family. Later today we can tell the family we are going for a drive and we will simply stop to visit Clarkson with the family being none the wiser."

"Thank you," he said, kissing her sweetly. "You don't know how happy you have made me," he said, placing his hand on her stomach. She smiled back at him, but he noted her lack of a reply. "Aren't you happy my darling?"

"I am happy that you are so happy," she replied, placing her hand on top of his.

"That is not the same thing. Why aren't you happy?"

"I am not unhappy."

"That isn't the same either. Mary, why are you not happy about this?"

"It just seems so soon, and in all honesty, I am not certain what type of mother I will be," she admitted.

"You will be an amazing mother."

"I have never been very good at loving people. Look at all the mistakes I made with you. Look at how I am with Edith."

"But look how you are with Sybil. And you cannot take all the blame for the mistakes we made - I certainly share in it - but look at us now."

"It took me years to love you and even longer before I would admit it What if I am the same way with the baby? I've been told that I am cold. What if I am too cold to be a mother?."

"Oh Mary, we did not meet under the best conditions so it is no surprise it took you a while to learn to love me. And you aren't cold. Whoever called you that didn't know you well at all. You put on a front of coldness in public, but it is an act. My mother told me it was you who ensured that William made it home to see his mother before he died. You yourself told me what you did to ensure that Anna and Mr. Bates had a proper wedding night. You kept Sybil's secret when you caught her attempting to elope with Tom even though you disapproved. You aren't cold at all, and I am certain that when you see the baby, our baby, you will instantly fall in love."

"What if it isn't a boy?"

"You needn't worry about that. I promise you that I will be just a pleased with a girl. It makes no difference to me. If you give me a house full of girls, you will never hear a word of reproach or regret from me. I am not like your father in this."

She pulled his face to hers and kissed him soundly. "You make me so very happy," she whispered before kissing him again.

TBC?

Author's Note: I was thinking of continuing this story as a slightly AU version of Season 3 if people are still interested.


	5. Chapter 5

Further Down the Line Chapter 5

"Mr . Crawley, Lady Mary, what can I do for you?" Dr. Clarkson asked as the pair was ushered into his office.

"You remember, of course, our earlier conversation. My nausea has continued all week, and I have been excessively tired."

"I see. I assume your cycle has not arrived either?"

"No."

"Well, may I offer my congratulations for I can say with great confidence that you are indeed with child."

"When will it be?" Mary asked, taking her husband's hand.

"That is hard say. Normally we would count the days since the woman's last cycle, but with yours being so irregular, I cannot be certain. You could be a few weeks along or as much as two months along. Once you feel the child move, we will be able to pinpoint a date with more certainty."

"I shall let you know as soon as I feel anything."

"Lady Mary, you must be sure to listen to your body. If a food does not agree with you, you need to avoid it. If you are tired, you must sleep - even at odd hours. You must not allow yourself to become overly tired, excessively excited, or anxious. You mustn't allow your lady's maid to tie your corset too tight. Additionally, there are some activities you shall need to refrain from. No vigorous activity or riding."

"And um…what about…what I mean to say is …. must we avoid …" Matthew had turned red as he searched for the proper word.

"Matthew please!"

"In that, I would say again, Lady Mary must simply listen to her body," Dr. Clarkson said with a smile. "If you have any other questions, please do not hesitate to call. Lady Mary, I would like to see you in another month to check on your progress."

"I cannot believe you asked that!" Mary said as soon as she and Matthew were back in the car.

"You cannot tell me you weren't thinking it when he said to avoid vigorous activity."

"Well perhaps, but I never would have asked it. It is so improper."

"Mary, you are pregnant and we are married. I am certain he knows what goes on in our bedroom," he said, rolling his eyes at her.

"Regardless, you do not need to refer to it - that is very middle .." she stopped herself she completed her sentence.

"Middle class?" he asked with a smile that said he wasn't angry. "Yes, we are much more practical. You cannot imagine that after waiting eight years for you, that I mean to refrain from these new found pleasures unless absolutely necessary, and I am very happy that it is not absolutely necessary."

"You are making me blush," she rebuffed him, but the smile playing at the corners of her mouth gave away the fact that she was pleased as well.

"I am you husband - making you blush is my prerogative."

"I want to wait to tell the rest of the family," Mary said.

"Why?"

"Sybil's baby is due in less than a month. I do not want to steal any of the attention from her. Besides, that will give me some more time to become comfortable with the idea. I want to be happy when I tell them."

"Very well darling, we will do it your way," he said, lifting her hand to his lips. "But I have a few stipulations."

"Such as?"

"You must promise to speak with Anna today about not lacing your corset so tightly as the Doctor instructed."

"Very well, she suspects the truth anyway but won't tell anyone."

"And I must have your word that you will not ride for the duration of your pregnancy."

"What if it is just a slow ride?"

"No rides whatsoever or I shall speak with all the groomsmen today."

"Very well - I promise. Does that conclude your list of demands?"

"Perhaps we should rethink converting the nursery into a sitting room."

"Well I think that is a given," she said with a laugh as the pulled up to the house. "I think I will lay down for a bit before dinner."

"I have just one thing to do and then I will join you."

"You really don't need to."

"I may not need to, but I want to," he said, kissing her quickly before she headed up the stairs. As soon as she was out of sight, Matthew headed straight to Carson's office where he found him straining wine.

"Mr. Crawley, what can I do for you?" Carson asked, standing as Matthew entered the room.

"Please sit," Matthew said as he closed the door. "Lady Mary has recently developed an aversion to eggs. I was hoping that you could see to it that they do not appear on her tray or the dinner table at the time until further notice."

"Of course," Carson replied fighting a smile. He had his suspicions about Lady Mary's condition since he learned that she had been sending back her breakfast tray every morning just as her mother had done years ago. "Are there any other foods that should be avoided?"

"Not that I know of, but if I become aware of any, you shall be the first to know. You might consider skewing the menus toward items she favors - I want to be sure that she is tempted to eat something."

"Is there anything else I can do for you sir?"

"Perhaps you might see to it that footstools appear near chairs she favors?" Matthew suggested.

"Of course sir. I shall see to it personally."

"I should appreciate it if you would keep this conversation confidential. She is not ready to share any news yet and besides, I would not want her to think I was being overly protective. I only want to ensure her comfort as much as possible."

"We are in complete agreement on that sir. Your secret is safe with me, but I hope you will allow me to offer you my sincerest congratulations Mr. Crawley," Carson replied, immeasurably pleased that his favorite had married this worthy man.

"I am very pleased to accept your congratulations. Very, very pleased," Matthew said, shaking Carson's hand before heading upstairs.

TB


	6. Chapter 6

Further Down the Line Ch 6

Mary awakened in the morning to the feel of her husband hand gently exploring the small swell of stomach. She smiled when she opened her eyes, so thankful that her morning nausea which had lasted for several weeks had not plagued her for more than a week now.

She moved her hand to cover and still Matthew's. He looked up sheepishly at her. "I can feel a small difference already."

"Not much yet," she replied. The swell was barely visible, but she had noticed that her skirts felt just a bit tighter.

"No, not much, but I can still tell," he said with a smile.

"So you fancy yourself some sort of expert on my body?" she asked, lifting a carefully sculpted eyebrow at him.

"Indeed. I have studied it from afar for years and up close for several months now, but I never object to a refresher course," he replied, placing kisses along her neck. He had missed their intimate activities in the morning over the past month when she had been so sick. He was well aware that it had been several morning now since she had been ill. She certainly looked as if she was feeling well right now, but he remembered what Clarkson had said. "Mary, what is your body telling you?" he whispered in her ear as he had many nights since their visit with the doctor.

"I cannot tell you - it is very unladylike."

"Now you must tell me," he whispered as he gently stroked her checks and tilted her chin so she was looking straight into his eyes.

"Only that i want you far, far more than I should."

"Trust me love, you are not alone in that feeling," he replied, kissing her deeply and making her forget all else.

Much later, as she was laying in his arms, her head resting against his chest, she decided to share something she knew would please him. "I was having a lovely dream when I woke this morning."

"What about my darling?"

She turned in his arms so she could look into his eyes. "You were playing with our son, our beautiful boy who looked so much like you, tossing him up into the air and making him laugh. It was so very nice and when I woke, I thought how perfectly happy I would be to see that in reality."

"Truly?"

"I am still a bit nervous, but I am happy."

"Shall I tell you a secret? I have a similar dream, but the child is a girl who looks so very much like you it nearly makes my heart stop."

"You think it is a girl?"

"It had been in all my dreams. I lovely girl with brown curls." She smiles thinking how very different he is from her father.

"I think it is a boy with the most beautiful blue eyes."

"Shall we wager?" he asks with a grin.

"What stakes are you offering?"

"The one who is correct picks the name."

"So you would be picking the name if we have a daughter? What if you pick something horrible?"

"I won't. Her name will be as beautiful as she is."

"What name?"

"You shall know on the day we meet her."

"Very well, it does not matter anyway since the baby will be a boy and I will pick the name," Mary said, pulling the chord to call Anna to dress her for the day. With a kiss, Matthew left for his dressing room to prepare for the day.

"Good morning my lady," Anna when she arrived.

"Good morning Anna."

"You look much better than you have lately my lady."

"I feel much better. Have you seen Sybil this morning?"

"Yes my lady. I brought her a tray earlier. She looks terribly uncomfortable, poor thing."

"The doctor says it can't be much long, a few days at most," Mary replied.

"That is good to hear. I don't know how much longer Mr. Branson will be able to stand it. Poor man is so nervous."

"That he is. I think I shall ask Matthew to take him for a drive or something while I visit with Sybil."

Matthew was unable to convince Tom to leave the Abbey when Sybil could go into labor at any moment, but he was able get him to agree to a game of billiards provided Mary swore to fetch him if there was any change in Sybil's condition.

"How are you feeling my darling," Mary asked when she and Sybil were finally alone.

"I am just ready for this to be over. My head aches dreadfully, my ankles are horribly swollen, and I am as big as a house."

"So I suppose that is what I have to look forward to?"

"Oh Mary, it is only so bad at the end, and after all the final result is worth all the discomfort. When will you tell everyone?"

"After your baby has come. Though Edith would never believe it, I have no wish to steal my sister's thunder."

"I wouldn't mind."

"No this is your time. I am pleased that our children shall be so close in age. I hope they shall be good friends."

"I am sure they shall be."

Author's Note: I am not sure whether to have events with Sybil's delivery play out as they did in 3x05 or not. I have ideas for both ways but I was hoping you as readers would let me know what you prefer.


	7. Chapter 7

Further Down the Line Chapter 7

Mary followed her mother, Dr. Clarkson, and Edith out of Sybil's room to see Tom, Matthew, and her father waiting in the hallway. They were all dressed in their robes as they had been awakened by a frantic Tom who was certain that the baby was on its way.

"Everything is fine," Doctor Clarkson said.

"You mean it was a false alarm?" Robert asked, remembering how Cora had experienced several false alarms, especially during her first pregnancy.

"Not exactly. These early labor pains show that the womb is preparing itself for birth," Dr. Clarkson explained, making Robert looked as if he might be sick. Mary had to fight back a smile at the uncomfortable look on her father's face.

"Dr. Clarkson, I am afraid Lord Grantham doesn't enjoy medical detail. The point is can we all go back to bed?" Cora asked.

"Yes you can and so can I," the doctor replied.

"I'll see you out," Mary offered.

"Sir Phillip Tapstill will be here tomorrow," Robert informed everyone.

"Of course, if you think it advisable," Dr. Clarkson replied, looking a bit offended as he made his way to the staircase.

"There really is nothing wrong?" Tom asked, gripping the doctor's arm.

"Nothing at all. She is a healthy young woman going through a normal and natural process," Dr. Clarkson assured him. Tom seemed a bit pacified and headed back to see Sybil as Mary and Matthew descended the stairs with Dr. Clarkson.

"How are you feeling Lady Mary?" Dr. Clarkson asked as they made their way down the stairs and out of the hearing of the rest of the family.

"Much better of late," she said with a smile.

"Very good. You must remember that despite all this excitement, you must continue to rest as you are in a delicate condition."

"I shall do my best, Dr. Clarkson but I will not be kept away from this happy event even if it costs me a little sleep."

"Well, get some rest tonight then and try to take a rest during the day whenever possible," Dr. Clarkson replied sees that arguing would be pointless.

"Who is Sir Phillip Tapstill?" Matthew asked when he and Mary climbed back into bed after seeing the doctor out.

"A well known doctor in London who specializes in delivering babies for highborn ladies," Mary replied as she snuggled up against Matthew.

"Why is he being brought in? Surely Clarkson has delivered many babies."

"Yes, but papa has lost faith in Carson after he misdiagnosed you and failed to see how serious Lavinia's illness was."

"Is that really fair? Clarkson did not wish to raise my hopes and all know the Spanish Flu can change quickly without any notice."

"Well fair or not, Sir Philip will be here tomorrow so there is really no point in discussing it."

"What does Tom have to say about it?" Matthew asked.

"I don't know that my father discussed it with him."

"Well he ought to. Tom is the father no matter how little your papa may like it."

"Papa only wants the best for Sybil, and I am sure Tom understands that."

"Regardless, Tom ought to have a greater say - it is his wife and child after all."

"Well, we will just have to remind papa of that if it becomes necessary, but my love I am sure everything will be fine. Mama will insist that Dr. Clarkson be present and surely two doctors are better than one."

"You had best get some sleep," Matthew said, kissing her softly.

"But I am not at all tired."

"It is past midnight darling."

"All the excitement has me wide awake."

"Well be that as it may, you heard the doctor - you must try to sleep."

"Perhaps you might have some ideas about how to tire me out?" she suggested, blushing and not meeting his eyes. Matthew had to smile at the fact that she was still shy about initiating lovemaking.

"I may have a few ideas," he replied with a grin as he pulled her on top of him.

The next morning, Mary was sitting on Sybil's bed trying to take her mind of the discomfort Sybil was clearly experiencing.

"I'm the size of a house. My back hurts, my ankles are swelling, and my head aches. Honestly I cannot recommend this to anyone," Sybil complained.

"I am listening, but as you know, I have already started one of my own," Mary said, gently touching her own stomach.

"Oh Mary, I do not mean to scare you - honestly. I am just so uncomfortable and ready for this to be over."

"I know and it will be over soon darling," Mary assured her.

"Mary, you know what I said about the baby being Catholic. I have just realized that the Christening will have to be here at Downton."

"Blimey," Mary said, knowing what a row this would cause with their father.

"I wanted the whole thing done in Dublin. Out of sight out of mind. But we can't wait forever. We can't not Christen it, the poor thing."

"You don't have to do this. It's your baby too," Mary said, worried that Tom might be forcing the issue on Sybil.

"I don't mind. I mean, I do believe in God, but all the rest of it - Vicars, feast days, deadly sins - I don't care about all that. I don't believe a Vicar knows any more about God than I do. But I love Tom - so very very much."

"I better let you rest. Don't worry. I will fight your corner with Traveres if it comes to it," Mary assured her with a smile, as she squeezes Sybil's hand.

Later that afternoon, Matthew had asked Mary to accompany him on a walk around the estate, saying that he needed to discuss some important estate matters with him. Mary was pleased with both the fact that he was taking his responsibilities to the estate seriously and that he was seeking out her opinions.

"Quite a few of the cottages have been renovated," he said.

"Thanks to you," she said, smiling at him.

"Maybe a little thanks to me, but many of the farms have been left entirely to their own devises. Colter hasn't farmed this properly for 20 years. He struggles to pay the rent which is too low anyway. There's been no investment. "

"Papa would say you can't abandon people just because they grow old."

"I agree but it would be cheaper to give them a free cottage and work this land as it should be worked."

"I see. And you don't think Papa understands that?"

"Maybe he harks back to a time when money was abundant and there wasn't much need to keep on top of it. I think he associates being business-like with being mean or worse, middle class, like me. But middle class have their virtues and husbandry is one."

"What you say makes some sense, but you must speak with papa."

"I intend to, but I wanted to speak with you first. It is vital that we protect the estate not only for our future as we have invested so heavily in it, but for our children," he said as he pulled her into his arms and let his hands rest lightly against her stomach.

"You know I will be on your side for there is little I want more than to protect Downton. I will fight in your corner if necessary, but you do need to speak to papa for he must be included. We ought to get back. Sir Phillip Thingy is due on the 7:00 train and you ought to be there to hold Tom's hand," she said, smiling up at him.

"Poor fellow. He's so terrified and so thrilled at the same time. As I would be - As I will be," he said, correcting himself with a grin. "I cannot believe that in only a few months, I shall be the one pacing the halls nervously awaiting news of you and our daughter."

"You mean our son," she corrected.


	8. Chapter 8

Further Down the Line Chapter 8

"Sir Philip seems rather sure of himself," Matthew commented as he lounged in bed waiting for Mary to join him.

"He does indeed. Imagine he thinks he is responsible for the Duchess having three boys. I am rather certain there is nothing he can do to ensure the gender of the child," Mary said as she climbed in next to him. "But I guarantee had Papa heard of him years ago, he would have been a permanent guest in the house in hopes that mama would have the son papa so longed for. If I give you a girl or two, Papa may install him in the house as it is."

"Well in that case, we will thank him for the trouble he took in traveling here and then send him back on his way. As I have told you, you can have all girls and I shall be happy."

"I believe you," she said, resting her chin on his chest. "But what about the entail?"

"That is something we can worry about later. If we don't have a son, we fight to break it, is as simple as that. But I think we may not even need to fight as the laws regarding women's rights are changing. I wouldn't be surprised it the entail is broken by law within the decade."

"But if the laws do not change, and if we have only girls, you promise to fight for them?"

"Mary, I will fight for you and any children we have until I draw my last breath."

"You don't know how much that means to me," she said, thinking how her own father had refused to fight for her. "You have made this so much easier on me. I still think it is a boy, but I am not plagued with worry about disappointment if it isn't."

"Good, I don't want you to worry about anything. It is not good for you in your condition. Now sleep darling, you need your rest."

The following day pasted quickly. Mary spent the morning with Sybil but had allowed Matthew to take her for a drive in the afternoon. Anna was helping Mary dress for dinner and had just pulled a shimmering black dress over her head.

"Anna, do you think this dress looks too tight?" Mary asked, looking in the mirror and noting the the dress was now noticeably tighter around both the stomach and chest. The dress fit still but it was clearly tighter than it had been a few weeks ago.

"It may be a bit tight, but I do not think anyone will notice my lady."

"Maybe you could lace my corset a bit tighter to hide it?" Mary asked.

"You asked me not to lace it so tight anymore and Mr. Crawley insisted that I do not."

"Oh very well. Just fetch the red dress, it is looser."

"As you wish," Anna said, removing the black dress and going to retrieve the requested dress.

"Mama sent me to get you. They are ready to start dinner but clearly you are not ready yet," Edith said as she entered the bedroom.

"All I need is my dress and I will be ready. I asked Anna to switch out my dress at the last moment," Mary replied, standing before the mirror to inspect her hair.

"Your corset is very loose, but perhaps you do not feel the need to look your best now that you have caught a husband."

It was on the tip of Mary's tongue to retort that at least she had caught a husband, but she caught herself, knowing it was for to soon to use that particular barb against Edith so soon after her failed wedding. "I have had a stomach ache all day. I simply did not want to exacerbate it with a tightly laced corset."

Anna returned and slipped the dress over Mary's head. Mary looked in the mirror and was pleased to see that the slight swell of her belly was hidden by the looser dress. She added a necklace and then announced that she was ready to go.

She and Edith descended the stairs and were met by Tom at the bottom.

"How is Sybil?" Mary asked, having not seen her since the morning.

"Sleeping thank God. She's been restless all afternoon. I don't think it will be long now," Tom replied with the worried look he had been wearing for more than a week now.

"I'm sorry it couldn't have been in Dublin," Mary said. She knew how upset she would be if she had to give birth to her baby away from Downton so she understood how he felt about having his baby born away from his native land.

"We know how much it meant," Edith added.

"Nothing means more than she does," Tom said earnestly. Mary smiled and squeezed his arm. Tom may not have been her first choice of a husband for her beloved Sybil, but he was a good man who truly loved her.

The trio entered the sitting room where the rest of the family along with Sir Phillip was already gathered.

"Hello granny," Edith said.

"Your grandmother will be with us every night until the baby is born," Cora noted.

"I hate to get news second hand," Violet remarked.

"Well you won't have long to wait," Sir Phillip assured everyone.

"I thought I would ring up Dr C after we've eaten," Cora said with a smile.

"Yes I've been talking to Lord G about the good doctor," Sir Phillip said.

"Sir Philip feels the room would be too crowded. it might be better to leave old Clarkson out of it for the time being," Lord Grantham said, avoiding direct eye contact with his wife who he knew would not be happy.

"But I said I'd telephone"

"Well it really isn't necessary," Sir Philip insisted.

"I've given him my word," Cora said firmly.

"Why don't I run down in the car after dinner and fetch him" Edith suggested.

"Dinner is served," Carson announced, drawing the group into the dinning room.

Matthew caught Tom by the arm and pulled him aside before they entered the dinning room. "You must speak up. Lord Grantham may be Earl, but it is your wife and child. You ought to have a say."

"The problem is I don't know what to say. I feel at sea in all of this. I know nothing of medicine and even less of childbirth."

"Are you coming?" Cora asked, poking her head into the hallway where Matthew and Tom were standing.

"Of course," Matthew replied, entering the dinning room and claiming a seat next to his wife. The first course was fish with Hollandaise. While Mary had been free of her morning sickness for a week now, Matthew did not want to risk it and silently signaled Carson to ensure that the sauce skipped Mary.

"It is never more tiring than waiting for something to happen," Cora remarked. Before anyone could reply, Sybil's nurse entered the room.

"Oh God, is it beginning?" Tom asked, the panic clear in his voice. Everyone rose from their seats as Sir Phillip placed an hand on Tom's arm to lead him up to Sybil's room.

"Carson, please tell the kitchen that dinner has been delayed," Mary said with a smile.

"Edith, please go fetch Dr. Clarkson," Cora said, with a determined look in Robert's direction. He nodded, accepting the fact that he had lost with as much grace as he could muster.

"I think I shall go check on Sybil," Cora said.

"I will join you mama," Mary said and the two of them left the room leaving Robert, Matthew, and Violet alone.

"What shall we do now?" Matthew asked.

"What men always do in these situations - wait."


	9. Chapter 9

Further Down the Line Chapter 9

Mary could not believe that only a few hours ago the family was rejoicing that Sybil had delivered a healthy baby girl and seemed to be doing well, and then a few short hours later Sybil was dead. She had died before their very eyes, gasping for breath and seemingly unaware of anything around her. Mary closed her eyes trying to fight back that image that she knew would haunt her, biting her lip to try to keep her tears at bay. She had not cried since it had happened, not once. She had to be the strong one, the calm one.

That night, she spoke briefly to Carson, giving him the sad news to share with the staff and directing him to call the funeral home to come in the morning. Then she spoke with Mrs. Hughes to instruct find something to feed the baby and to locate a wet nurse as soon as possible. When she finished with her tasks, she noticed the light was still on in Sybil's bedroom. She entered quietly expecting to see Tom but instead saw her mother.

"It's time to go to bed mama. You'll need rest to face tomorrow."

"Not just yet. This is my chance to say goodbye to my baby. You go. I'll be alright, I promise."

"I could stay or would you prefer to be alone?" Mary offered.

"Alone I think, but thank you. And Mary, could you ask your father to sleep in the dressing room tonight?"

Mary nodded and quietly left the room. She understood her mother's reason for wanting to sleep apart from papa that evening, but was terribly sad that her parents would not be able to seek comfort in each other. She took no pleasure in being the messenger on this particular occasion. Her father seemed numb when she told him, as if he still could not process what had happened.

When she finally made it back to her bedroom, Matthew was sitting in bed waiting for her. She took off her robe and slid into the bed beside him, knowing that sleep would not come tonight.

"Oh Mary, I am so, so sorry," he said as he pulled her into his arms.

"Please Matthew, I cannot speak about any of it tonight, not Sybil or the baby or my condition, not any of it," she pleaded, but she allowed him to hold her. She could not let her tears fall or they would never stop. The thought of letting him see her cry was unbearable - she was the strong one, his storm braver. Even worse than showing him her sadness would be showing him her fear.

"But Mary…"

"No please. Just hold me."

Matthew wanted to talk, to reassure her that she could cry in front of him, that he would be her strength this time, but if she was not ready, he would not force the issue. He pulled her closer, knowing he would not find sleep tonight. He was sad about Sybil and his heart went out to poor Tom, but his worry for Mary weighed just as heavily on his mind. As he stood at the foot of Sybil's bed watching her slip away from them in such terrible way, he could not help but think that Mary could share her fate.

When dawn came, Mary and Matthew were still silently wrapped in each other's arms, but neither had slept a wink.

"I had best get up. There is much to do today," Mary said as she began to rise.

"Promise me you will rest some today," Matthew asked, noting the heavy bags beneath her eyes and the fact that she looked more pale than usual.

"How can I rest? I will be needed to arrange things, and I am glad to be busy for it shall help me take my mind of things at least for a time."

"Will you at least eat breakfast?"

"I am not at all hungry, but please ring for something if you are," she said pulling the chord for Anna before stepping into the bathroom to splash some water on her face.

When she returned to the bedroom, Anna was there waiting for her.

"Please see that all my mourning dresses are prepared. I shall need them in the coming days. I should prefer the loosest ones possible - I do not want even the slightest hint of my condition."

"Yes my lady," Anna replied. Soon Mary found herself dressed in loose black dress that hid her secret well.

Matthew rose from the bed to stand behind Mary, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek. "Please promise me you will not wear yourself out today. It is not healthy for you or the baby."

"Please do not talk about the baby right now. I cannot face it yet," she said as she fled the room, leaving Matthew staring after her.

Mary was correct that she would have much to do. Lord Grantham's grief was such that he would not leave his dressing room, and Lady Grantham was inconsolable in her room. Edith was too distraught to be much help, so it was left to Mary to deal with all the necessary arrangements. She noted all morning that Carson appeared to be watching her closely and continually suggest that she take a rest or have something to eat causing her to briefly wonder if he knew or had guessed the truth.

Saying goodbye to Sybil before they took her body away was one of the hardest things she had ever had to do, but again Mary refused to cry. Tom and Edith were there and she could not let them see her break. But even when the Hearst pulled away, she fought back the tears.

Matthew had spent the morning worrying about his wife until Carson notified him that Mr. Murray had arrived. Given the events of yesterday, Matthew had completely forgotten his imminent arrival. Despite the unfortunate timing, Matthew went to meet him as no one in the house would wish their sadness to cause any delay in the efforts to free Mr. Bates.

"Mr. Murray, I am so sorry no one was at the station to meet you. As you can understand, our minds have been elsewhere. I hope you can forgive the slight."

"There is nothing to forgive. It is completely understandable. Allow me to offer my sincerest condolences on the passing of Lady Sybil."

"Thank you. Unfortunately, Lord Grantham is indisposed, but I will send for Anna to speak with you. It is the sincere hope of the entire family that Mr. Bates is freed as soon as possible from his most unjust imprisonment. Oh and one other thing - I had been hoping to speak with you on matters of estate management, but I fear today would not be the best time for that. Perhaps you could clear sometime in your schedule in the next week or two and I could travel to London to go over it."

"Of course. Let me know when you would like to make the trip, and I shall make myself available."

"Thank you," Matthew said before leaving to send for Anna. Once he had told Mr. Carson that Mr. Murray was awaiting Anna in the library, Matthew began to search for his wife. After checking several rooms, he found her going over plans for the reception that was to follow the funeral service with Mrs. Hughes.

"Thank you Mrs. Hughes," Mary said, dismissing the housekeeper when she noticed that Matthew had entered the sitting room.

"Why don't we sit down for a moment darling?" he suggested.

"I cannot, there is too much to do. I really must go down and speak with Mr. Traverse."

"Surely you can rest for a moment. Have you eaten at all today?"

"No, but I am not hungry. I really must go," she said, leaning down to kiss his cheek before swiftly exiting the room.

The next three days continued in much the same way. Matthew's worries continued to mount as Mary continued to sleep very little and eat even less. She kept herself busy all day, and while she allowed him to hold her at night, she remained resolutely silent and insisted on his silence as well. The one thing certain to cause her to flee the room was any mention by Matthew of her own pregnancy.

Despite the fact that her fears and sadness were mounting, she still had not cried, not even at the funeral. When the last car departed from the house following the funeral, Mary knew she could no longer keep at bay the tears that had been threatening to fall all day. When she saw Matthew approach Tom, she took the opportunity to slip out of the room and then out of the house to seek the solitude that she needed.

Her absence was soon noted by Matthew promptly excused himself to find her.

"Lady Mary left the house on foot a few minutes ago," Carson informed him when Matthew entered the hall.

After briefly offering his thanks for the information, Matthew headed out of the house, determined to find her. He soon located her on the bench she had favored for years.

"I am fine. I just need a moment alone," she said, when he sat down next to her.

"You are not fine Mary, and no one could expect you to be. You lost a sister in a most horrific way."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"So you have said for three days, but silence has not helped you either so why don't we try talking?" he suggested, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her closer to him.

"If I talk about it, I will cry," she said. Crying in front of people was simply not something she was willing to do.

"Blub all you like - there is only me to see," he said, tilting her chin so she would look up at him. The earnest look in his eyes undid her and her tears finally started to fall.

"She was the best of all of us. She had none of the mean streak or selfishness that Edith and I have. Why her?"

"Oh my darling, death is never fair. It can take the youngest and kindest among us. We can ask why, but the answers never come. I know for I have asked that same question before. Why did I live and William died? Why was Lavinia, who never hurt a soul, struck down so young? But there are no answers so we cannot waste our lives looking for them. We can only remember those we have lost. And darling, you can do something more than remember. You can tell her daughter all about her so that she can know her mother through your memories."

"I have not been to see the baby, not since I saw Sybil holding her. I don't think I can face seeing her yet."

"But you will soon. We will go together when you are ready."

"I don't know when I will be ready. She isn't just a reminder of Sybil, she is also a reminder of what I have to face in a few months."

"Mary, I know you are scared, and I am too. But you heard Clarkson - what happened to Sybil was very rare. There is no reason to think it will happen to you - none at all."

"But it could," she whispered.

"But it is very unlikely and all this worry cannot be good for you. If something happens, we will know what to do. I won't sit idly by and allow others to make the decisions. We know what to look for and we will be ready to act."

"That's not fair - Tom did not sit idly by."

"No he was pushed aside. I will not be pushed aside by anyone. I will have frequent updates - very frequent. I shall be right stand outside the door if necessary and now that I think about, perhaps I shall stand inside the door." Then his ears filled with the sweet sound of Mary's laughter, a sound he had not heard for days.

"I should love to hear what Granny would say about that," she said, smiling at him as he brushed a tear away from her face.

"Your father's reaction might be equally amusing," he said, brushing his lips against her forehead as his hands came to rest on her stomach. "But in all honesty Mary, I shall be wherever you want me to be. If you want me to wait outside, I will, but if it would bring you comfort to have me there with you, then I shall be."

"I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I am so very glad I did whatever it was," she said, allowing her hand to cover his.

TBC

Author's Note: It was hard to decide whether or not to stick with Sybil dying. I am sorry if this when differently than you wanted and I hope you will stick with the story.


	10. Chapter 10

Further Down the Line Chapter 10

"Welcome home sir," Carson greeted Matthew as he returned home from work.

"Thank you Carson. Have you seen Lady Mary?"

"I believe she is in the nursery with Miss. Sybil."

Matthew thanked him and then headed to the nursery. It had been a month since Sybil's funeral and three weeks since Mary had first held the baby. Since then, Matthew knew that every day since she had visited. As he approached the open door of the nursery, he slowed his step. His breathe caught in his throat as he saw her standing in front of the window gently swaying the baby in her arms while softly singing to her. Leaning against the doorframe, he smiled and continued to observe her.

When Mary finished her song, she looked down to see that the baby had finally fallen asleep. Smiling, she walked to the cradle, kissed her forehead, and laid the sleeping baby down. When she looked up, she noticed Matthew staring at her from the doorway.

"How long have you been watching me?"

"Not long, but I must admit, I was enjoying the view. You are a natural."

"We better go before we wake her, and I need to tell her nurse that she sleeping."

"Then meet me in our bedroom."

"Matthew! It is the middle of the afternoon."

"Not for that. We don't have a private sitting room, and I need to speak with you alone." Nodding, she assured him that she would be there shortly.

"What did you need to speak with me about?" she said when she entered their room where he was lounging comfortably in an armchair.

"Come sit with me," he said, holding his arm out to her. Once she was settled comfortably on his lap, she waited for him to start. "I am going to London on Friday morning to meet with Mr. Murray about the estate."

"I see. Is Papa coming?"

"No, not this time. I need to speak with Murray alone first to get his unbiased opinion which I don't think he would give if your father was present."

"But you will speak with Papa soon and before you attempt any changes?"

"Of course."

"Very well. I hope your trip is productive."

"That was much easier than I expected," he confessed.

"I don't see why. I told you I would support you. I want to protect Downton too, now more than ever since we will soon have someone we need to protect it for."

Smiling, he ran his hand over her belly, pulling her dress taut to show the bump that was clearly visible in all but the loosest of her dresses. Loose dresses were all she wore lately as she had not yet shared their secret with the rest of the family.

"Will you be back Friday night?" she asked.

"Well that depends on you my darling. You see, I thought perhaps you might like to come with me, and we could stay in London for a few days."

"I would like that very much. I can call Aunt Rosamund - I am sure she would be happy to have us stay with her."

"I was thinking we could stay at hotel. We have not been truly alone since our honeymoon." He loved the fact that she still blushed.

"You still want me? Even with this?" she asked, gesturing to her stomach.

"I can't imagine that a time will ever come when I won't want you."

"I shall remind you of that in a few months when I am the size of a whale."

"Maybe I should remind you now," he whispered in her ear, as he lifted her up and carried her to the bed.

"Matthew, it is the middle of the afternoon!"

"Your point darling?" And as he began kissing down her neck, she soon forgot whatever point she was going to make.

A few days later, Matthew and Mary took the morning train to London. Once they had checked into the hotel, Matthew again checked with Mary to see if she would accompany him to Murray's office.

"No darling, I shall leave that to you. I trust you will share what you learn with me later though."

"Of course. What shall you do all day?"

"I was thinking of doing a little shopping and maybe having tea at a favorite cafe of mine."

"Buy something pretty for yourself," he encouraged. After making plans to meet back at the hotel before dinner, the pair went their separate ways.

Mary spent the early afternoon happily shopping although most of her purchases were for others. She had selected a lovely dress for little Sybil first. Next she wanted to buy something nice for Anna to wear when Bates was released. She entered Harrods hoping to find something that would be appropriate. What was she supposed to buy for herself? Any dress she purchased would only fit for a short time anyway. Despite that fact, she did purchase one beautiful red dress since she knew Matthew had plans to take her to the theater tomorrow night. A glance in the mirror revealed that the dress did not fully hide her pregnancy, but she knew Matthew would not mind. Indeed, he smiled every time he saw her bump. It really was no use trying to hide it any longer. Her family would have to be told when they returned home.

Wandering through the store, she came upon the nightgowns. On a whim, she decided to purchase a new nightgown for Anna as well. Mary did not know how Anna had survived so many months away from her husband. Mary knew that if she were in that situation, she would want to welcome Matthew home properly. The nightgown she selected for Anna was a traditional but lovely silk gown trimmed with pink ribbons. As long as she was here, Mary decided to purchase a new nightgown for herself as well.

"Is there anything I can help you find?" a saleswoman asked.

"Nothing specific. I was just looking for a new nightgown. Something my husband will appreciate," she said, hoping she was not blushing.

"Of course. We have some lovely, but daring new nightgowns from France," the saleswoman said, leading Mary toward the back of the section to show them to her. It was beautiful, but so short that Mary was certain it could not truly be called a gown. Mary suspected the piece would barely reach her knees - such a thing certainly could not be proper.

"I am a Lady. I could never buy such a thing," Mary protested.

"I assure you, we have lots of Ladies who buy these along with the occasional Countess and Duchess."

Mary reached out her hand to touch the garment. The deep red silk and lace was so tempting, but what if it scandalized Matthew? She decided to buy it, but would wait until later to decide if she had the courage to actually wear it.

Having completed her shopping, she decided to stop at her favorite little cafe that made the best desserts. Sitting down, she ordered a pot of tea and a slice of chocolate torte. While waiting for her order, she felt an odd sensation in her stomach. It felt like a flutter, almost like she swallowed a butterfly. At once, she remembered what Sybil had told her about how it felt when she first felt her baby move. Smiling, she moved both her hands to her stomach, but could feel nothing from the outside. The fluttering continued on the inside though.

"Well hello there little one," she said softly as she caressed her stomach. "I cannot wait to tell your papa. He will be so excited."

"It appears congratulations are in order."

Mary gasped at the familiar voice, her hands flying away from stomach as she looked up to see Sir Richard staring down at her.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Further Down the Line Chapter 11

"Richard, what are you doing here?" Mary gasped as she tried to collect her thoughts.

"My dear surely you remember it was I who introduced you to this cafe," he responded smoothly, claiming the seat across from her.

"Of course," she said nervously, remembering that it was in fact Richard who had first brought her here, silently cursing herself for not remembering it earlier.

"So, married to Crawley with a baby on the way less than a year after we parted ways. It seems you can move swiftly after all," he commented bitterly.

"I don't know if anyone could call eight years swift."

"I expected it you know - just not quite so quickly. Barely a month after we after our engagement ended, your new engagement was announced. Call it a reporter's instinct, but I suspect the deal was sealed even before that."

She kept silent about the fact that her engagement to Matthew actually occurred only days after Richard had left. They had thought it best to wait a while before officially announcing in hopes that doing so might allow Richard's anger to cool such that he might not publish her story. They would have waited longer to announce, but they were both eager to finally marry.

"I thought about publishing your story that day. It would have sold many newspapers - your engagement photo next to a picture of your dead Turk. 'Scandalous, unchaste daughter of an Earl forced to marry a common middle class solicitor.' Yes it would have sold many papers."

"I rather thought you would publish."

"So did I. Fitting punishment and profit to boot."

"What stayed your hand?"

"At first I told myself I would publish on your wedding day instead."

"But you didn't."

"No," he said simply.

His words from their parting echoed in her ears 'I loved you, you know. More than you knew, and much, much more than you loved me.' For her, their engagement had been a business deal. Never had she suspected that he loved her.

"I am sorry for any hurt I caused you," she offered truthfully.

"We could have been happy you and I," he said with a sad smile.

"Perhaps, if Matthew did not exist, but that fact is he does. So you and I could never have been happy together. You would never have been free of him and that would have made you angry and jealous your days. But if it makes you feel any better, the fact that I would have been unhappy has nothing to do with you. The simple fact is, I could never be happy with anyone else as long as he walks the Earth."

"Or wheels it for I think you loved him even then."

"Yes, even then," she admitted.

"I suppose Miss. Swire was right that night."

"Yes, I suppose she was," Mary said. Although she would never admit it to Matthew, she she had always suspected Richard was being truthful that night he and Matthew had fought. "I do hope you will find happiness."

"Another plea to stay my hand?"

"No, you will do whatever you wish although I suspect that if you were going to publish, you would have done so by now."

"Well, in my business you never know what tomorrow's headline will be. I think I have disrupted your tea long enough," Richard said as he stood and prepared to leave.

Mary stood and held her hand out to him. After a moment of hesitation, he took her hand. "I wish you all the best," she said sincerely. He offered her only a small smile and nod before leaving. She was well aware that he did not offer her his good wishes. As she sat back down and sipped her tea, she was not overly concerned that he would actually publish her story. If he was going to publish it, he would have done so either when his anger was fresh or on the occasion of her engagement when it would have sold more papers.

She was extremely thankful that Matthew was not with her when she ran into Richard. Both men intensely disliked one another. Taking another sip of tea she wondered whether it would be best to tell Matthew of her meeting with Richard or remain silent on the issue.

Glancing at her watch, she realized that she had lingered much longer than she intended too and was now going to be late in meeting Matthew back at the hotel. She collected her packages and hailed a taxi.

When she entered the hotel room, Matthew was lounging in a chair reading a newspaper.

"There you are darling. I was beginning to worry you had run off with someone else," he said with a teasing smile. "It looks like your shopping trip was successful," he commented as the bellman carried her packages in.

"They are not all for me. I did buy a dress for myself, but the others are gifts for Sybil, Anna, and you," she said, waiting for the bellman to leave and then going to sit on Matthew's lap.

"For me?" he asked, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"Well sort of for you," she said blushing.

"How can a gift be sort of for me?"

"If you are good, perhaps I shall show you how later tonight."

Matthew swallowed hard as he understood her meaning. "Why wait until tonight? I am quite at leisure right now."

"Matthew! We have not even had dinner yet" she scolded him only half-heartedly.

"We could order dinner in our room as we did on our honeymoon." He knew he was temping her and that she was about to give in. "No need to dress for dinner, sharing the news of the day in bed."

"Oh I do have news," she said excitedly as she remembered what she had to tell him. "I felt the baby move today."

His hands went directly to her stomach as she knew they would. "I don't feel anything," he said, the disappointment clear in his voice.

"He's not moving right now, and even if he was, you can't feel it from the outside. It was truly amazing though. All of the sudden, I felt this odd fluttering inside," she said, the smile on her face showing him how happy she truly was.

"You must tell me about it. When did this happen?"

"It was this afternoon after I finished shopping, I stopped at a little cafe for tea. I was sitting at a table and it just started."

"How long did it go on for?"

"I am not sure. I suppose it was only a minute or two. It stopped when …" she trailed off not waiting to say it stopped when Richard showed up.

"When what darling," he said, stroking her cheek tenderly.

"When an old friend showed up and surprised me," she said, thinking that this moment was just to sweet to allow Richard to intrude on it and ruin it for Matthew. She wondered whether or not that counted as a lie. She only omitted a detail and it wasn't one she thought Matthew was ever likely to discover.

"Do I know her?"

"Her?"

"Your old friend."

"Oh Matthew, do you really want to talk about some old friend who doesn't mean anything or do you want to baby?"

"You're right darling. Tell me more about our daughter moving."

"Son"

"We shall see," he said, kissing her passionately. "Now about my present…"

"It is not very ladylike."

"Then it is a good thing I am middle class solicitor and not a gentleman."

TBC

Up Next - Will Matthew learn about Mary's secret encounter with Sir Richard?


	12. Chapter 12

Further Down the Line Chapter 12

"I am not wearing that one," Mary insisted as Matthew held out one of the new dresses she had purchased the day before when Matthew to convince her to purchase several dresses that did not hide her pregnancy.

"Why not? It is very becoming."

"Because I do not want to announce my pregnancy by simply stepping off a train," she said as she grabbed a loose dress that she had brought with her. "Besides, I only agreed to wear those new dresses at home. Not out in public."

"I spoke with mother this morning and invited her to the Abbey for dinner tonight," he informed her. They had agreed last night that they would make the announcement at dinner tonight.

"I called mama who is inviting Granny over as well. I do hope they will all be happy."

"Of course they will all be happy."

"I worry about how Tom will take it," she admitted. "He seems to finally be recovering a bit but I fear this could push him back."

"Perhaps we should speak with him privately before dinner?" Matthew suggested.

"I think we should. I have an appointment when Dr. Clarkson this afternoon."

"Is something the matter?" he asked, the concern obvious in his voice.

"Nothing at all. He wanted me to come in as soon as I felt the baby move, and it has been moving all weekend."

"Of course. I will come with you."

"You really don't have to."

"I know I don't have to, but you need to remember that I want to. Now hurry up or we will miss the train and your appointment."

When the pair went directly from the train station in Ripon to Dr. Clarkson's office where they were ushered right in.

"Lady Mary, I trust you are feeling well," Dr. Clarkson said as he entered the room.

"Very well," she said with a smile.

"Good, good. Well what can I do for you?"

"I felt the baby move on Friday and everyday since."

"Wonderful. Most women feel the baby move any time between 16 and 24 weeks so we still won't be able to pin point an exact time frame for your due date, but I would like to examine your stomach to get a better estimate. Mr. Crawley, you are welcome to step out."

"I would like to stay unless you want me to go," he said to Mary.

"I don't mind if you want to stay."

"Very well. It won't be invasive at all. Let's just take your measurements and weight and compare them to your last few visits." Mary allowed the doctor to do his work.

"Well, Lady Mary, I think you are coming along nicely. I would venture to guess that you are somewhere around sixteen to eighteen weeks."

"When will I be able to feel the baby move?" Matthew asked.

"Not for several more weeks. Perhaps four to six weeks. Now please forgive me, but I need to address an unpleasant subject," Dr. Clarkson said. Mary, knowing what that subject was, reached instinctively for her husband's hand. "Given what happened to your sister, we need to watch you closely for signs of pre-eclampsia. This will involve weekly checks of your blood pressure and urine. I apologize for the indelicacy, but I will need a sample to test," he said as she handed her a small jar. Shortly later, the tests were completed and Clarkson was pleased to inform the couple that at this point, there were no signs of pre-eclampsia.

"Thank God," Matthew said, lifting he hand to his lips.

"But I will still need you to come in for a check on a weekly basis."

As soon as they arrived back at the Mary, Matthew led Mary to their bedroom. Before the door was fully closed he pulled her into his arms and murmured " thank god" over and over. She took his face between her hands and kissed him passionately.

"I need you Mary," he whispered huskily in her ear as he began walking backwards blinding toward the bed and pulling her with him. When his knees hit the bed, he flopped onto it taking her with him causing her to sprawl ungracefully on top of him.

An hour later, Mary was just about finished re-arranging her hair while Matthew was still lounging in bed. "You had best hurry and dress if you want to speak with Tom before dinner," Mary chided.

"How is it you can get out of bed so quickly afterward?" he complained, wanting nothing more than to remain abed, but knowing she was right. Reluctantly, he got out of bed and re-dressed himself.

"You hair is still a bit out of place darling," Mary said.

"I wonder who is to blame for that," he teased.

"Need I remind you whose idea this afternoon escapade was?" Mary replied with a raised eyebrow as she smoothed his hair back into place. "There, now you are presentable again. Now come along, we don't have much time before we need to prepare for dinner," she said as she grabbed the present she had purchased for the baby.

Tom was always to be found there before dressing for dinner as it was after the baby's name and she was usually wide awake and happy that time of day. When they opened the door, Tom was sitting in the window seat holding little Sybil.

"Don't get up," Mary said as he moved to stand. Matthew pulled a chair over next to Tom and gestured for Mary to sit. "We brought a gift for the baby."

"That was't necessary," Tom said.

"Nonsense. She is my niece and my Goddaughter so it is my perogative to spoil her. You must learn to accept that," Mary said with a smile.

"Very well. You hold the baby, and I will open the present," he suggested, gently passing the baby into Mary's waiting arms. He opened the package to reveal a beautiful green dress.

"It is lovely. Thank you."

"I thought green for Ireland - she is Irish after all ," she told him.

"Thank you, it was very thoughtful and she will look beautiful in it."

"Tom, we wanted to tell you something before we tell the rest of the family," Mary said gently. "You see, Matthew and I are going to have a baby." She risked a glance at his face and it showed none of the surprise she expected.

"I know," he said softly.

"How?"

"That night you were sick and left the dinner table, it reminded me of when Sybil did the same thing so I asked her that night and she told me. I know it was supposed to be a secret, but she always said that sharing secrets in bed didn't count." There was a sadness in his eyes when he spoke of Sybil, but sharing good memories made him feel closer to her and was becoming a little easier with each passing day.

"No, I don't think they do count," Mary said, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder.

"I am happy for you and she was too. And it will be good for little Sybil to have a cousin."

"She will be the older one, so she'll have to teach him the ropes," Mary said with smile.

"Her, she will have to teach her the ropes," Matthew corrected.

"Sybil thought we were having a girl. I think there might be something to a mother's instinct," Tom said.

"Don't encourage her. Mary is already too sure of herself by half," Matthew said.

Soon the dressing gong rang and Mary and Matthew returned to their room to prepare for dinner.

"Wear this one," Matthew said, holding up one of her new dresses.

"If I wear that one, there will be no need to make an announcement at all."

"You did promise to wear them around the house. Besides, you know how much I like seeing you in these."

"Oh very well," she said, rolling her eyes and taking the dress as Anna walked in and Matthew retreated to his dressing room.

"What a lovely new dress my lady," Anna said as she held it up to examine it.

"I have a gift for you Anna, but part of it must be our secret," Mary said as she handed a wrapped box to her, thinking that no one in the family would approve of one of the gifts the box contained.

"A gift? But why?"

"Because I wished to. I wanted to get you something nice for when Bates is released. Heaven knows you deserve it."

"Oh my lady, it is beautiful," Anna said holding up the new dress Mary had gotten her. Anna gasped and blushed as she held up the lovely nightgown in the bottom of the box.

"Remember, that last part is our secret," Mary said with a smile.

"Of course and thank you. It was very kind," Anna said, hoping that she would have a private opportunity to wear the gift for her husband.

"And don't worry about when you can wear it. I know how important it is to have private time with your husband. I will speak to Papa and Matthew and finding a cottage for you and Bates. It might not happen right when he is released, but I promise that it won't be long."

"Oh my lady, you don't know how much that means."

Soon Anna had Mary dressed and ready for the evening. "I suppose the secret is out in this gown," Mary said, examining her figure in the mirror.

"Shall I get a looser dress?" Anna offered.

"No, my husband has a strange since of fashion and in a moment of weakness, I promised to indulge him."

"There is nothing strange about it. You are beautiful like this," Matthew said from the doorway. "Everyone is in the drawing room. Shall we?" he said, offering her his arm. She took a deep breath to prepare herself and then took his arm.

When they walked into the drawing room, all conversation stopped as the occupants all stared at Mary.

"Mary and I have an announcement to make," Matthew said after clearing his throat.

"My dear, I think the thing has announced itself," Violet said, gesturing to Mary's stomach.

"Mary, why haven't you said anything? You must be several months along," Cora said, standing to embrace her daughter.

"Four months actually, maybe a little more," Mary offered.

"Well done," Lord Grantham said, patting Matthew on the back. "Carson, the best champagne we have in stock please."

"Of course, and may I offer the most sincere congratulations from all the staff."

A week later, Matthew was reading his newspaper in the library when Carson entered. "Sir, I wondered if I might have a word with you in private?"

"Of course Carson. What can I do for you?" Matthew replied.

"Sir, I have pondered this all morning. When sorting the post this morning, this was included," he said, showing Matthew an oversized envelope. "It is for Lady Mary."

"Then why are you discussing it with me? I would never censor her mail."

"It is from Sir Richard. I know they did not part on good terms and did not wish to allow anything that villain might say to upset her, especially at this time."

"You were right to bring it to me. Thank you Carson," Matthew said, taking the envelope. Once Carson left, Matthew paced the room trying to decide what to do with the envelope he was holding. Should he open it and invade Mary's privacy? But if he did, he could prepare her for what is inside and soften any threats it might contain. On the other hand, he remembered how angry he was when Mary opened Mr. Swire's letter even with the best of intentions. He sat and stared at the envelope wondering what to do and silently cursing Sir Richard for coming back into their lives.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Further Down the Line Chapter 13

Matthew felt as though he had been staring at that envelope for hours without making up his mind on how to proceed. Mary was likely to be very angry if he opened it without speaking with her and honestly he would not be able to blame her. On the other hand, if this letter contained threats or information that Richard finally planned to publish, wouldn't it be better if he broke that to her gently?

Perhaps he should go to her and they could open it together? He sighed and rubbed his forehead as he tried to figure out the best way to proceed.

Risking her wrath, he finally decided to open it secure in the knowledge that she could not be too upset given the fact that she had opened his mail before. With a deep breath, he broke the seal and pulled out the stack of papers inside. There was a letter on Richard's personal stationary and behind the letter was a contract signed by the former Mrs. Bates, several handwritten pages detailing the story of Mary and the Pamuk, and a picture of the long dead Turk. He quickly put the picture of Pamuk at the back of the stack where he would not have to look upon it. Instead, he read the letter from Carlisle.

_Mary,_

_ I have not stopped thinking about you since our meeting at that quaint cafe we both favor. You know, my dear, that I am not a sentimental man, but even I believe that there must have been a reason to bring us back together like that. Since that day, your words have played over and over in my head. The truth was unpleasant to face, but not unexpected. If I loved you better, I would have set you free long before you broke things off. _

_ I feel compelled to do something I ought to have done long ago. It was always your story - never mine - so I am returning it to you._

_ Richard_

Matthew's hands clinched into a fist as he re-read the letter. Mary had met Richard while they were on holiday in London? Even worse, she had not said a word to him about it. He could feel his anger rising quickly. Why would she hide this from him?

"There you are darling. I though perhaps we could go for a drive this morning," Mary said as she breezed into the room. The smile melted off her face when she noticed the cold glare that Matthew fixed upon her. "What is the matter?" she asked, stopping a few feet in front of him.

"You saw Carlisle while we were in London?" he asked, his voice a mix of anger, hurt, and confusion, hoping against hope that it wasn't true - that Carlisle was simply trying to stir up trouble.

Mary paled immediately at the accusation. "Whatever you think, it is not that. Please just sit down and let me explain."

"You met him and you didn't tell me! No worse you lied to me. I asked who you met at the cafe that day - I asked you directly" Matthew yelled, rising and brushing past her.

"Matthew, stop and listen to me. Give me a chance to explain," Mary said grabbing for his arm as he attempted to leave the room.

"You had more than a week for me to listen to you - more than enough time for you to explain! But you let me find out from a letter from Carlisle?" He flung the letter at her and stormed out.

"Matthew please," she begged, following him from the room as he headed to the main door, but he did not even look back. She stopped when she reached the door, refusing to chase him in public. Tears formed in her eyes as she watched his form growing more distant as he hurried away from the house without so much as a glance back in her direction.

Taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes, she walked slowly back to the library to see the contents of Richard's letter scattered across the floor where they had landed. Bending down, she gathered all the loose papers. Gasping, she stumbled backwards when she saw the picture of Pamuk. She quickly covered the picture with the other papers, not wanting to look upon the face of her long dead lover. Grabbing the rest of the papers, she hurried to her bedroom.

Once she locked the door, she sat and read the letter. She expected to feel relief that all the evidence regarding her story had been returned to her, but she was too upset by Matthew walking out to feel any relief. She shoved the letter and other evidence into a drawer to deal with later, after she and Matthew had reconciled. In all their months of marriage, he had never walked out on her - not even during their fights about the Swire inheritance. She nervously paced their bedroom hoping he would return soon. She could take him angry and yelling much easier than she could take the uncertainty of not known when he would come back.

Not telling him about meeting Richard had clearly been a mistake - she realized that now. She had told herself that she remained silent for his benefit - that there was no need to upset him by mentioning a chance meeting with Richard whom Matthew clearly detested. She never imagined that he would find out, but now that he had, she understood his anger. She was fully ready to apologize, but couldn't do so until he re-appeared. She would assure him that she loved only him, that she told Richard that very thing, that she only kept silent so as not to spoil a treasured memory for him, but she couldn't do that until he came back.

As the day wore on, Matthew still failed to return. She had left instructions with Carson that she was to be informed the moment he returned. Becoming more anxious as the hours passed, Mary began wondering the grounds hoping to come upon him, but he was not to be found.

By dinner time, Matthew had still not returned to the Abbey and Mary was forced to attend dinner without him. She could tell by the looks of pity that she was receiving from various family members that one of the servants must have overheard the argument between her and Matthew and told one of the members of the family. Her mother had even whispered to her that Matthew would certainly be back soon. The empty seat at the table was painful for her to see. Unable to bear it any longer, she quickly excused herself as soon as dinner ended and headed straight to her room.

Despite knowing that she had been wrong in not telling him about meeting Richard earlier, she was now becoming angry with Matthew for his response. How dare he walk out on her without even giving her a chance to explain. She deserved that chance, for there was no malice in her actions.

Downstairs, Tom put on his coat and asked Carson to order the car for him.

"Where are you going this time of night?" Lord Grantham asked.

"To find Matthew and bring him back," Tom replied.

"Perhaps he just needs some time alone," Lord Grantham replied.

"With all due respect, we have all just been reminded of how short life can be. Whatever they fought about can't be important enough stay away from one another even for a short time, and I intend to remind him of that."

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Further Down the Line Ch 14

When he walked out of the Abbey, Matthew had no clear plan on where to go. All he knew was that he could not talk with Mary at that point - he was far too angry for that and was bound to say something that he would regret, something that she would not be able to forgive. As he walked away, he was fairly certain that she was crying, but he refused to look back. He knew that if he saw her tears, his resolve would crumble, and he could not allow that. He knew he was in the right here - she had lied to him or at the very least kept a significant secret from him. He really shouldn't be surprised as Mary had certainly kept secrets from him before. Without conscious thought, his feet carried him to Crawley House.

"Matthew, what a lovely surprise," his mother said, rising to greet him as he entered. It was then that she noticed the anger on his face. "Whatever is wrong?"

"I don't wish to speak about it Mother."

"Well then you should have gone elsewhere. Now sit down. I will Ethel bring us some tea and you can tell me what is troubling you." Isobel left the room briefly to speak with Ethel. When she returned, Matthew was sitting in a chair staring at the ground and visibly very angry.

"Now then, what has you so angry?" she asked, taking a seat across from him. He remained stubbornly silent.

"Has Cousin Robert rejected your ideas again?" Matthew did not respond at all.

"Has Cousin Violet said something?" Again, there was no response.

All the sudden it dawned on her. "It was Mary, wasn't it?" At the sound of Mary's named, Matthew visibly reacted and Isobel knew she had struck a chord. She was not surprised that Matthew and Mary had apparently had a bitter quarrel. In truth, although she knew they loved each other deeply, she was rather surprised that such a quarrel had not occurred earlier in their marriage.

"What happened?"

"We quarreled," he said simply, refusing to give her any more information.

"That must I gathered. What did you quarrel about?"

"Mother I will not discuss it with you. That is my final word on the subject."

"Very well, just remember that you will not heal this rift sitting in my parlor," Isobel said, leaving him alone to stew.

The day wore on agonizingly slow for Matthew. He was still very angry with Mary, but another part of him simply yearned for her presence. He thought about returning but if he did, he knew their argument would be explosive. Her actions were unacceptable. He could not believe she would keep such a secret from him, especially in light of the fact that her last secret had caused so much pain for both of them for years. He knew if he went back now, he was likely to throw ugly accessions about her previous secret of Mr. Pamuk in her face, and that was something he could not risk - especially not after his promise to her that night he proposed.

He had no appetite at all and refused his mother's offer of dinner. Instead, he poured himself a strong drink and remained in the sitting room by himself. He wondered how Mary was handling what must be an awkward dinner at the Abbey with his chair empty. He knew Robert and Cora would be less than pleased with his behavior toward Mary, especially in her condition. Well certainly absenting himself for a time was better than a loud argument in which they were both bound to say hurtful things that would be hard to forgive and even harder to forget.

Matthew heard a knock on the door and at first thought perhaps it was Mary coming to apologize and make peace. Don't be ridiculous, he told himself. What were the chances that _Lady_ Mary would humble herself like that? Almost nonexistent he was sure. No, she would wait for him to come to her regardless of who was in the wrong.

"Mr. Branson to see you sir," Mosely announced as Tom entered the room.

"Well, this looks familiar," Tom commented as he surveyed the room. It was the same setting which Tom had entered the night before Matthew's wedding, with Matthew sitting in the same chair holding the same drink.

"Has Mary sent you?" Matthew asked, taking a long drink.

"No, I don't think she knows I am here. I sent myself," he said, taking a seat in a chair near Matthew's.

"How is she?"

"It is hard to read Mary, but her eyes looked like she had been crying and she did not eat much at dinner." Matthew hung his head, feeling guilty for being the cause this, but if he were to go back, he was certain the argument that would ensue would result in even more tears.

"So what was it that has you hiding at your mother's house?"

Matthew expected to remain silent, but found himself at ease with Tom and started talking. "She met Carlisle while we were on holiday in London and did not tell me. She deflected and lied about it when I asked her directly who she met. I discovered the truth today when he sent her a letter."

"You can't imagine that Mary was untrue to you," Tom said with certainty. Mary might be stubborn, prideful, and vain at times, but disloyalty was not something someone could ever accuse her of. The idea that she would be disloyal to Matthew of all people was simply unthinkable.

"No. No, I never thought that. It was the secrets and lies that angered me. You don't know what secrets have done to us in the past," Matthew said, thinking of all the years they could have had together if her secret had not come between them.

"Perhaps, but I cannot imagine that walking away was helpful in the past either."

"No, that wasn't helpful either," Matthew replied, remembering his role in their past mistakes. Perhaps storming out today had been a mistake after all. It dawned on him then that in some ways they were still very much the same boy and girl that they were at the garden party so long ago.

"Look, you are married and so there are bound to be fights - that is just how it is. Go back and fight if you must, but go back. The longer you stay away, the worse it will."

"When did you become the sage of the family?"

"I am no sage. Just a man who has knows how little these arguments mean in the grand scheme of things, especially when life can be cut so tragically short. You clearly love Mary and she you. You will work it all out and be stronger for it. Then you are going to learn another important lesson."

"And what is that?"

"How sweet the making up can be," Tom said with a grin.

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Further Down the Line Chapter 15

Matthew paused outside the bedroom door, not sure what type of welcome he would receive from Mary. He had thought a lot on the way back to the abbey, but was still unsure what to say to her. He fully intended to explain his anger, but he now realized that he probably owed her an apology as well for simply walking out on her when she was trying to explain. He took a deep breath, ran his fingers through his hair, and then knocked softly on the door.

"Who is it?"

"It is Matthew. May I come in?" He waited nervously when he did not receive an immediate response. A few seconds later, the door opened and Mary was standing in front of him in her nightgown.

"It is your room too - there is no need to knock," she said. He searched her face to find any sign of her emotions, but found he could not read her.

"I did not know if I would be welcome after I stormed out this morning," he admitted.

"Oh Matthew, you will always be welcome, even when I am mad at you," she said, stepping aside to allow him entry.

"And here I thought I was the one who was mad at you," he said with a half smile as he closed the door behind him.

"You have every right to be angry with me, and I shall willingly apologize, explain, and answer any questions you may have. But Matthew, I must admit, I find myself rather angry with you as well for walking away without giving me the opportunity to do so earlier."

"I know," he said taking a seat a chair. "Come sit with me and we'll talk," he said, holding his arm out to her in a peace offering.

"You want me to sit on your lap while we fight?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"No I want you to sit on my lap so we don't fight. We will talk, but I don't think I would be able to lose my temper while holding you."

"Oh very well," she agreed and settled herself on his lap, secretly pleased with his idea for she thought it would help her stay calm as well.

"I know I should have told you about Richard, but Matthew, I swear to you nothing happened between us, nothing," she said earnestly.

"I know that Mary. I never thought anything like that happened," he said taking her hand.

"You didn't?" she asked, for she had worried that given her past he might question whether she would remain true, especially given the fact that she kept the meeting secret.

"No, not even for a moment," he replied truthfully. "But why didn't you tell me you met Carlisle that day?"

"It is hard to explain. I would like to forget everything that happened with Carlisle and how close I almost came to marrying him instead of you. I do not like to be reminded of it. I do not want him invading on any part of our marriage. That day, right before I ran into him, I had just felt the baby move. I was so very happy and started talking to the baby and then he showed up. I did not want Ricard to be a part of that memory for me, and even more, I did not want him to be a part of that memory for you. So when I told you about it, I just left him out of the story. I had ruined so many things for you - I just did not want to ruin another one."

"Oh Mary," Matthew whispered as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her closer, feeling the last of his anger melted away. He remembered how on their wedding night as she laid in his arms afterward how she had whispered her apology for 'ruining everything' by her actions with Pamuk. "You didn't ruin anything," he assured her, just as he had done that night.

"You know that is not true," she said, her eyes not meeting his.

"It is true," he said, tilting her chin upward so her eyes met his. "Mary, I appreciate that you did not want to ruin the memory of our baby's first movement by including Richard, but you should have told me later. We can't have secrets from each other. You know what secrets have done to us in the past and the heartache they caused. That is why I was so angry."

"I know, but in all fairness darling, I don't think walking away served us well in the past either."

"You are right - it certainly didn't, and I am sorry I stormed off without letting you explain. I shall try not to do it again darling."

"And I shall try to not keep secrets from you."

"Then I forgive you."

"That easily?" she asked. In truth, she had expected to have to apologize much more.

"That easily. It is important that we be open and honest with each other - very important. You made a mistake, just like I did, so as long as you don't do it again, I forgive you."

"Oh my darling, I forgive you too."

"Then tell me now, what did happen when you met Richard?"

"Not much actually. He told me about how he nearly published the day our engagement was announced and then again on our wedding day, but something stopped him from doing so. The day he left, he told me that he loved me more than I knew, and I think perhaps that was true and maybe still is. Richard tried to convince me that he and I could have been happy, but I told him that was impossible because I could never be happy as long as you walked the Earth."

"Did you really tell him that?" he asked, secretly pleased that Richard was told how matters stood.

"Those exact words," she said with a smile as she brushed the hair back from his forehead.

"I love you, Mary. More than I ever thought possible," he replied, leaning into her touch.

"I feel the same way my darling."

"Please say I can kiss you because I need to desperately."

"You can do more than kiss me," she said, leaning in to capture his lips.

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

Further Down the Line Chapter 16

Mary sat in the nursery holding baby Sybil. In the middle of her fifth month of pregnancy, her body had noticeably changed. To her great delight, Sybil had recently started to laugh in response to tickling and funny faces. Since she was quite alone, Mary began making silly faces at the baby in hope of drawing out her laughter. She even went so far as to stick out her tongue at the baby and make ridiculous noises to accompany the faces she was making. Soon, she was gently tickling the baby's sides as well. Her efforts were soon rewarded as the baby giggled happily at her antics, making Mary laugh in response.

"If anyone had told me year's ago that Lady Mary Crawley would be making silly faces at my baby to get her to laugh, I would have laughed them out of town," Tom said from the doorway.

"Perhaps I would have as well, but things are different now," she replied with a soft smile.

"Indeed they are. Far different than I could have ever imagined," he said as he gently took the baby from her arms.

"It appears as though Papa has finally convinced you to play cricket," Mary said, noting the cricket clothing he was wearing that appeared to be borrowed from Matthew.

"It is the price of him agreeing to try Matthew's plans for the estate although I have no idea why Lord Grantham wants me to play when I have never played before. Thankfully, Matthew is trying to teach me what little he can in the few days left before the match."

"Papa has always taken the cricket match very seriously."

"Too seriously if you ask me, but if that is the price, well so be it. I only hope I don't look a fool."

"I am sure you won't look a fool - Matthew won't allow it. He shall have you ready to make the house proud. I am sure of it," she said, squeezing his arm. "Tom, I have been meaning to talk with you about something. I know Matthew would tell me it was not my business, but I feel I must."

"Go on then," he said, wondering what she had to say.

"I think you and the baby should stay here at Downton. Please hear me out. It is better for everyone. The baby is so lovely, she raises everyone's spirits when they see her. I can't imagine not seeing her every day and I know mama could not imagine it either. If you are working all day, she will have only nanny for company. Here she has many relatives who love her and visit her everyday. Soon she will have a cousin to play with - certainly that is better for her as she has no sisters or brothers. It will be better for you too. If you move, you will be so lonely at night when the baby is sleeping. Here, you have company. I know Matthew would miss your company dreadfully and so would I."

"You would miss the ex-chauffeur?"

"No, I would miss my brother and so would Matthew. Besides, I think he needs you to talk some sense into him every not and then. Please think about it." After he promised to consider it, Mary returned to her room where she found Matthew changing his clothes from the cricket lesson.

"You could call for Mosely you know," she said as he unbuttoned his shirt.

"I am not dressing for dinner, just a simple change of clothing. I am more than capable of undressing myself, unless of course you would like to do it for me," he said with a suggestive smile.

"So you can make me as untidy as you are?" she said, but she walked toward him and began work on his buttons. "It was sweet of you to help Tom."

"Yes well he helped me in getting your father to see reason so it was the least I could do," he replied, unable to focus much on Tom or cricket when Mary was removing his clothing. "Perhaps, we could talk about this later," he suggested as he leaned in to kiss her.

A few days later, Mary was seated on a blanket on the ground, holding the baby and watching the cricket match. She thought Matthew looked very fine in his cricket whites and looked every bit the gentleman she now knew he was. He often told her how lovely she looked, and she hoped she would remember to tell him tonight how very fine she thought he looked today.

The size of her stomach made holding the baby against it rather awkward, so she had the baby leaned against her legs as she smiled at her and stroked her soft cheeks. It was then that she felt an odd sensation. Her own baby was moving inside which she had grown used to over the past six weeks, but this time, she swore she could feel it from the outside as well. She carefully balanced baby Sybil with one hand and then moved her free hand over her stomach. Seconds later, she gasped when the baby moved again and she was sure she felt it with her hand.

"Are you quite all right Mary," her mother asked, turning to look at her when she heard the gasp.

"Quite all right mama," Mary said, moving her hand away. Although she was eager to share her new discovery, it was Matthew she wanted to share it with first. He should be the first to place his hand against her belly and feel the sensation of their child moving within.

After a few minutes, when it looked like a break in the match was about to occur, Mary handed the baby off to her mother and moved to stand along the sideline to wait for Matthew. She smiled when the break was called and Matthew headed straight for her.

"You look lovely my darling. Are you comfortable? Perhaps you ought to sit in the shade," he suggested after lightly kissing her cheek in greeting.

"I am fine, more than fine actually," she said, taking his hand and leading him behind a hedge. He wondered why she was talking him out of eyesight of everyone, but he followed willingly.

"Mary, what is all this about?" he asked when they came to a stop.

"I felt the baby move," she said with a huge grin.

"That is wonderful," he said, thinking that was a very odd reason to pull him aside when it had been happening for about six weeks now.

"You don't understand. I felt it from the outside this time, and you will be able to as well," she said, grinning as she took his hand and placed it against her stomach. Matthew could not contain his grin as he waited to feel something, but after a few minutes, he still had not felt anything.

Mary saw the disappointment on Matthew's face as nothing happened and tried pushing his hand harder against her stomach in hopes that would urge the baby within to move, but it did not work.

"I am so sorry Matthew. He was moving for several minutes and then just stopped."

"It is perfectly alright darling. I need to get back to the match anyway. I am sure I will have the opportunity to feel her move soon," he said, trying to keep the disappointment from his voice.

"Tonight. We will take dinner in bed. I want to share it just with you, and he moves more when I am sitting or laying down."

"We will scandalize the house if we do that," he said, cupping her chin.

"Well, I suppose I am due for a new scandal," she said with a grin. "Besides, we can always blame it on my condition - say I don't feel well after a day in the sun and you wish to say with me to offer comfort."

"I did not know it was possible to love as much as I love you," he told her earnestly, as he leaned in to kiss her. Their kiss was broken when they heard Lord Grantham calling for Matthew as the match was resuming.

"I shall look forward to tonight," she said as she pulled away.

"How do you expect me to concentrate on the match now?"

"I am sure you will find a way," she said with a laugh as he jogged off. He had not been gone a minute when the baby began moving again. "Oh, so now you move. Well I hope you cooperate tonight child. It would mean so much to your papa."

That night, the sat snuggled together in bed, Matthew's hands laid gently across her stomach waiting to feel something. "Mary, it has been over an hour. I still have not felt anything."

"Sometimes, the baby moves when I talk to him. You could try that," she suggested.

"Talk to your stomach?"

"You don't have to," she said, afraid he thought her suggestion was ridiculous.

"No, I want to," he said, repositioning himself to bring his face near her stomach. Mary smiled and ran her hands though his hair as he began to talk. "Hello child. It is your papa. I would very much like it if you would move." He waited and hoped but still nothing happened. "One little kick sweetheart, that is all I ask. Could you do that for me?" Still nothing happened.

"I should have known. She is stubborn just like her mother and does not take well to being told what to do," he said, looking up at Mary.

"And wants to remain unpredictable," she added with a smile.

"Perhaps I shall name her after her mother," he said.

"I think two Marys might be confusing darling."

"Perhaps Andromeda then," he said in jest.

"What a name for an English girl," she said laughing as he crawled up her body.

"We could always call her Annie - a good English name," he said with a grin. "And if on the off chance you are right and it is a boy, you could call him Percy, short for Perseus."

"I have already found my Perseus," Mary replied.

"I thought I was the sea monster," he said, his lips hovering just above hers.

"I thought so too, but then my eyes were opened," she said, closing the last gap between their lips. Seconds after their lips met, he felt something against his stomach which was now aligned with her.

"Mary, was that that baby?" he asked in wonder.

Mary just grinned in response as he pulled back and placed his hands on her stomach where he was greeted with a firm kick from the baby.

TBC

Author's Note: Hope you are all still enjoying. Let me know if you want Matthew or Mary to be right about the baby's gender


	17. Chapter 17

Further Down the Line Chapter 17

"Really Matthew, it is only my weekly appointment. You really don't have to come," Mary insisted as she put her hat on.

"You tell me that every time, and every time you get the same response - I know but I am coming. Perhaps it is time for you to stop saying that I do not need to come," Matthew replied. Besides, he thought, her blood pressure and protein level both increased slightly each week for the past three weeks and with just under three months to go before the baby was due, he was terrified that this trend would continue. He kept his fears to himself so far as Dr. Clarkson had said she was not in the range that indicated pre-eclampsia.

"Very well, I was just trying to spare you the boredom of waiting for test results and talk of medical detail."

"I shall be fine. Now let's go before we are late."

An hour later, Mary and Matthew found themselves waiting in Dr. Clarkson's office for the results of Mary's tests. Matthew could tell by the look on Clarkson's face when he entered the office that the news was not good. He reached instinctively for Mary's hand.

"Mr. Crawley, Lady Mary, I am afraid the results of the test are not as we would wish them to be. I do not want to alarm you, but both Lady Mary's blood pressure and the protein levels in her urine have risen again for the fourth week in a row," he said as he took a seat behind his desk.

"Despite your words, that sounds like it is cause for alarm," Mary said, noting how white Matthew's face had gone and how his grip on her hand had tightened significantly.

"You are not in the danger zone, at least not yet, but if this trend continues, I am sad to tell you that you will be in danger of developing eclampsia as your sister did," causing Matthew to swallow hard and close his eyes as if to block out the unwelcome news.

"How close am I to that danger?" Mary asked.

"Normally, we would deem a woman to be in a state of pre-eclampsia if her is above 140 over 90 and if they protein in her urine was greater than 300 milligrams. You are very close to these levels. Your protein level is a little less concerning than your blood pressure. The level of protein in your urine is 250 while your blood pressure is 135 over 90."

"What can be done?" Matthew asked, standing up to pace the office.

"Well, high blood pressure can be the result of many things. Stress and worry is one of the main causes so rest and a worry free environment may help."

"You tell me this and you expect me to be worry free?" Mary asked in disbelief.

"There must be something you can do - some medicine you can prescribe!" Matthew shouted, his hand connecting with the desk.

"There is nothing else. Rest and calm are the best medicine in this case. Try not to worry, Lady Mary is still outside the danger zone."

"Only just outside," Mary said softly.

"But still outside. And I see none of the dangerous swelling that would indicate heightened cause for concern. It is possible this trend may reverse or at least tapper off in the coming weeks,. I urge you to rest as much as possible and hope for better results next week," Dr. Clarkson said.

Matthew silently helped Mary into the car noting in her eyes a fear he had only seen that horrible night when Sybil died. As he took his place in the driver's seat, he picked up her hand again and placed a soft kiss on it. "Everything will be fine, Mary. I will make sure of it."

Mary smiled weakly at him. Although she knew he would do anything to keep her safe, she also knew there was precious little he could actually do.

He was silent on the drive back home. His mind was racing as he tried to formulate a plan. Mary's health and safety were paramount. He needed to know more about eclampsia, that much he knew. He would not allow himself to be at sea as poor Tom had been. As soon as Mary was tucked safely in bed, he would begin making calls to find the best specialist available in the country. He felt a bit guilty that he would be keeping this from Mary, but he had no choice. He could not worry her by letting her see his worry.

Mary too was silent, lost in her own thoughts. She feared for her safety and that of her unborn child, but she was also terrified for Matthew. It was unfair that he should be burdened by having to make a life and death decision that could cost Mary her life if he chose wrong. Poor Matthew already carried so much guilt for Lavinia's death, a death he did not medically cause. She could not imagine the guilt he would carry if his decision cost Mary her life. No, he should not have to make that decision.

At that moment, Mary decided that she must be the one to make the decision, if for no other reason than to protect Matthew from himself. Remembering how Sybil was delirious during her labor, Mary knew that she needed to make any decisions long before her time to deliver was upon her. In order to make a decision, she needed more knowledge of eclampsia. She decided to look into finding the best specialist she could so she could speak with him and ask him all the necessary questions to make an informed decision. She felt a bit guilty knowing she would keep this secret from Matthew - poor thing was worried enough already and she could not bear to cause him to worry any more.

She wasn't sure how she would find this specialist - she couldn't tell anyone that might speak of it to Matthew. She knew one person she could call who had a way to find any information one might need, but was telephoning Sir Richard really a good idea? He certainly wouldn't speak with Matthew. After a moment of doubt, Mary decided that Richard was fairly likely to help her if she asked, but could she speak with him of such an intimate issue? And how would Matthew react if he discovered that she turned to Richard for assistance? On the other hand, she did not know what other options she had for obtaining the information, and after all she was doing this for Matthew's sake more than her own.

"Let me help you upstairs," Matthew said, shaking Mary out of her thoughts as they arrived back at the Abbey. She took his arm and allowed him to lead her up to their bedroom.

"You must rest darling. If there is anything you need, anything at all, just say the word."

"Are going to stay with me?"

"I am going to speak with your parents, Carson, and Anna about the need for your rest and comfort. Then I will be back."

"Please do not mention eclampsia. It will worry them far too much. Give them any other excuse. No need to worry them now," Mary entreated.

"Very well, but you must agree to rest and try to relax."

"I will rest, but I cannot promise I won't worry."

"I know my darling, but I will take care of you. I swear it. You and our baby will be just fine."

"I know you will my love," she said, smiling up at him.

TBC


	18. Chapter 18

Further Down the Line Chapter 18

It had been three days since her doctor's appointment, and Matthew had scarcely left her side. Because of his nearly constant presence, Mary had not time to act on her plan to seek out a specialist to provide her with more information on eclampsia. She was however grateful for the delay as it had allowed her more time to think through her options for obtaining help in her quest.

While she was certain Richard could obtain the information quickly and was fairly certain that he would actually do it for her if she asked, she knew how irate Matthew would be if he ever discovered that it was Richard whom she turned to for help. For that reason, she had started to consider other options. No one downstairs would have the connections to be of any use in this matter. Her father was out of the question for although he would likely be able to acquire the information, he would likely tell Matthew. She considered telling her mother, but mama was still grieving for Sybil and she could not bear to make her worry already about the possibility of another daughter sharing her fate. Granny would probably help, but again she did not want to bring more grief and worry on her either. Edith was a possibility. Her job with the newspaper would likely give her access to reliable researchers, but Edith was never one to keep Mary's secrets. No, voluntarily giving her secret to Edith and expecting Edith to keep it would be like inviting the fox into the henhouse and expecting it to refrain from eating.

That left her with only one real alternative to Richard - her mother-in-law. Isobel had connections in the medical community and could likely find the necessary information rather easily. The only problem was that Isobel was Matthew's mother, and Mary had no idea if Isobel would be willing to keep a secret from her own son.

So Mary was left to decide between asking for help from a person certain to draw Matthew's wrath or a person who might not be willing to keep a secret from Matthew, even if that secret was for his own good.

"I am so sorry darling," Matthew said as he entered the bedroom. "Tom needed to speak to me briefly about some renovations we have planned. We were supposed to meet with some of the contractors this afternoon, but I am certain Tom can handle it on his own."

"No need to apologize. In fact, I think you should go to the meeting. I will be fine by myself for a few hours."

"I am not leaving you alone. Your father, mother, and Edith have all gone out."

"One is never alone in this house. Help is just a chord pull away," she said, gesturing to the chord beside the bed. "Besides, I was thinking of inviting your mother for tea."

"My mother?" he asked, raising an eyebrow because he knew that Mary and Isobel had never been close.

"Yes, your mother. Is that so had to believe?"

"No, I am sure she would be delighted."

"Then it is settled. You will go to your meeting, and I will have your mother over so there is no need at all for you to worry. Besides, it is high time your mother and I spent sometime alone together. I have been wanting to hear stories about your boyhood misdeeds. "

"Oh very well, I will go call her. Just remember, I have easy access to your father and can find out stories about you as well," he said, kissing her cheek as he left to telephone his mother. Matthew was correct, and Isobel was indeed delighted to accept Mary's invitation to join her for tea that afternoon.

Later that afternoon, Mary was reading in the sitting room when Carson announced Isobel.

"No need to stand dear," Isobel said as she saw Mary begin to rise in greeting. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine, but Dr. Clarkson has insisted that I rest and Matthew hovers over me as if I am made of glass."

"Men always think pregnant women need to be coddled," Isobel replied as she took a seat next to Mary. They made small talk until Carson brought the tea.

"Thank you Carson. Will you please close the door and see that we are not disturbed?" Mary requested.

"Of course my lady," Carson said, pulling the door closed.

"Oh dear, that sounds serious," Isobel said, wondering why Mary had really asked her over for tea.

"Isobel, I have something I wanted to ask you."

"Anything dear."

"But first, I must have your promise to keep all I say secret from Matthew," Mary said, her pleading eyes meeting Isobel's curious ones.

"Why would you want to keep something from Matthew?"

"Until I have your promise, all I can tell you is that it is for his sake, not mine, that I am asking this."

Isobel was unsure how to answer. She had never kept secrets from her son, but she could see from the look on Mary's face that she earnestly needed help. Isobel had once thought Mary was not a good match for her son, but she had since changed her mind. That Mary made Matthew happier than she had ever seen him was enough, and she was certain that this once haughty girl loved her son ever bit as much as he loved her. Isobel decided that Mary spoke true when she said this secret was for Matthew's sake.

"Very well. While I do not think it helpful when spouses keep secrets from one another, I will keep your secret Mary." The relief on Mary's face was instantly apparent.

"I don't really know where to begin. Did Matthew tell you anything about my appointment with Dr. Clarkson earlier this week?"

"Only that Dr. Clarkson felt you should rest."

"The doctor has been doing weekly tests. Over the past several weeks, the test results have been trending in a dangerous direction. It seems that I am close to developing pre-eclampsia."

"Is this what you are keeping from him? Mary, you must tell him."

"No, he already knows. He was there with me. Dr. Clarkson did not have any other suggestions other than rest. Matthew is so worried, so terribly worried. He raised his voice at the doctor when he said there was nothing we could do. I know he is terrified."

"So what is it you want of me?"

"I want you to help me find a specialist - someone who knows much more about eclampsia than Doctor Clarkson."

"Why wouldn't you want Matthew to know about this? Surely additional knowledge of the subject might help settle his mind."

"Because once I know enough, I want to decide what to do should I develop eclampsia. Isobel, I could not let them put that decision on Matthew's shoulders. If that happen and he had to make a decisions and something went wrong, he would never forgive himself. You saw how he was after Lavinia's death and he had nothing to do with that. I will not risk that happening again, so I am going to take that decision out of his hands. for his sake. If I do die, he can be as angry with me as he wants, but at least he won't hate himself."

"Oh Mary, how do you plan to prevent him from having to decide? Eclampsia can cause you to hallucinate and lose all reason."

"When I know what I want done, I am going to put it all down in a letter which I will give to you. If nothing happens, we can destroy it, but if the worst does happen, you can let them know what I want. The decision will be mine and mine alone so he cannot blame himself for any complications. I will leave another letter for him just in case the worst does happen."

"I can't help thinking it would be better if you talk this through with him. It is unfair for you to have to bear this burden alone."

"I wish I could, but if he has any role in the decision and something bad happens, I don't think he would ever get over it. I need him to be the man I love to raise our child, not the shadow of that man that he was when he was so despondent after Lavinia's death. So I must protect him from himself, for him and for our child. Will you help me do that?"

Isobel squeezed Mary's hand, marveling at the quiet bravery of the younger woman and assuring her that she would do everything she could to help her.

"Now then, you must tell me a story of Matthew's childhood so I have something to tell him we talked about - some boyhood antics of his," Mary said, forcing a smile and pushing these unpleasant thoughts out of her mind.

Mary felt better that evening than she had in days. Isobel had promised to start working immediately to find to her a specialist. While it was likely the specialist would be located in London, Mary decided she would wait until later when she had an appointment to find an excuse to travel to the city. While felt better than she had in days, a glance at Matthew told her that his worries still weighed heavily on him. She decided then to try to lighten his mood a bit too.

Walking over to the bed, she lifted the comforter and sheets and peered underneath them. Seemingly satisfied, she walked to the other side of the bed and repeated her actions.

"What are you doing?" Matthew asked.

"Just checking for frogs," she said with a grin.

"I can't believe she told you about that. I was five when I put a frog in my mother's bed. I don't think it is something you need to worry about," he said with an embarrassed smile.

"One can never be too careful," she said, smiling back at him.

"I hope that is the worst she told you."

"She may have mentioned something about her niece putting you in a dress."

"I was even younger then and had no choice in the matter."

"Whatever you say darling," she teased.

"Just so you know, I will be seeking out your father first thing in the morning. I am certain he has some stories to share with me," he said as he climbed into bed. She immediately rolled into his arms and settled her head on her chest.

"I do love you darling, even if you did wear a dress. Just don't go wearing any of mine," she said as her fingers danced across his chest.

"It seems you may need a reminder of my masculinity," he replied, leaning down to capture her lips with his. Mary grinned against his lips, knowing that at least for a little while, they would both be able to push their fears aside and simply enjoy each other.

TBC


	19. Chapter 19

Further Down the Line Chapter 19

Matthew arrived home to find Mary resting in their bed flipping idly through a magazine.

"Hello darling," he said, greeting her with a quick kiss on the cheek.

"You're home early," Mary said, sliding over to make room for him to join her on the bed.

As he sat beside her, he rested a hand on her belly and was promptly greeted with a strong kick causing him to laugh out loud. "Well, hello to you too sweetheart," he said with a smile, rubbing her belly softly.

Mary smiled and placed her hand over his. "I love when you talk to the baby."

"Well then it is a good thing that I love to do it," he said, smiling back at her. "How are you feeling today my darling?"

"Very well. I walked the grounds with mama this morning," she said, pleased that Dr. Clarkson had cleared her for such activity last week when both of her tests showed a slight improvement.

"You must be sure not to over do it," he said, the worry showing on his face. He knew Clarkson had said some minor activity such as walking would cause no harm, but he still worried.

"You mustn't worry so much. I am fine. We are fine," she said, squeezing his hand. She hoped she sounded more confident than she actually was. Of course she was heartened by the improved test results this week, but she knew the danger was still there. Despite that, she did not want Matthew to worry and sought to convince him that all would be well.

"Of course you are," he said, patting her hand and hoping it sounded genuine. While he was pleased that her tests had improved, he could not chase the worry from him mind. He knew that worry and stress were not good for Mary and sought to protect and reassure her as best he could. The thought reminded him of the reason he had sought her out this afternoon. "My love, I must go to London. I leave on Thursday morning and shall return on Friday evening."

"Why?"

"I have a meetings including a meeting with Mr. Murray to discuss estate business," he said. He hoped that she would refrain from asking additional questions about the purpose of his trip. While he had no wish to lie to Mary, he could not tell her the real purpose of his trip. Yes he had a meeting with Mr. Murray, but the real reason for his trip was that he had an appointment with Dr. Johnson who was foremost expert in England in eclampsia. A part of him felt hypocritical about keeping this from her, especially after he had been so insistent that she be truthful with him, but he could not risk worrying her in her present condition.

"May I come? I would like to do some shopping for Christmas gifts." Mary said, thinking that this might be the opportunity she had been looking for. She had been extremely worried about what excuse she could use to travel to London to see the doctor Isobel had found.

"I do not think traveling in your condition is a good idea," he said hesitantly.

"What if I clear it with Dr. Clarkson?" she asked, seeing him begin to waiver.

"Very well, you can come if Dr. Clarkson agrees there is no threat to your health. If he allows you to travel, we might as well stay the weekend so you can spread your shopping out over several days so you don't tire yourself out," he said with a sigh.

"I shall call on the doctor first thing in the morning," she said with a smile, certain Clarkson would give her permission to travel. As soon as she had his permission, she would be calling another doctor to set up an appointment during her time in London. It was true that she did want to do some Christmas shopping, but that was not her main purpose in wanting to go to London. She felt bad about concealing this from Matthew, but she knew it was for his own good.

The next day, Mary was proven right as Dr. Clarkson gave his permission for her to travel to London. She immediately phoned the specialist in London that Isobel had located and was able to secure an appointment. She tried to push any thoughts of guilt out of her mind, promising herself that she would go out of her way to make Matthew happy in all other ways to allay the guilt she was experiencing for the secrecy.

When they arrived in London on early Thursday afternoon, Matthew escorted Mary to the hotel to ensure that she settled in comfortably.

"Really Matthew, I am fine. Don't you have a meeting to get to?" Mary asked when he continued to linger in their hotel room.

"I am meeting Murray in a half hour. That is my only meeting today although I do have another tomorrow," he said, hoping she did not hear the guilt in his voice. "Perhaps you should just rest this afternoon. You must be tired after the train ride and you have all day to shop tomorrow and Saturday."

"Very well, I will rest today," she agreed, knowing that her appointment was not until tomorrow and if her resting this afternoon would put his mind at easy, she was willing to do that. He was pleasantly surprised by how easily she agreed.

"Thank you love. Perhaps we can have a nice dinner tonight."

"Whatever you wish darling," she said with a smile.

"Well you are just far too compliant. Who are you and what have you done with my wife?" he asked playfully, catching her by the waist and pulling her to him.

"Are you complaining?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

"Not complaining, just observing."

"On second thought, perhaps I should spend the afternoon shopping instead of resting," she said with a grin. Before she could continue, he lifted her up into his arms and started walking through the sitting room toward the bedroom. "Matthew, put me down. You will hurt your back! I am far too heavy for you now."

"I am fine," he insisted as he deposited her on the bed.

"You better go or you will be late."

"I would rather stay with you."

"I know you would," she said, reaching up to caress his cheek.

"I can't tell you how happy it makes me to know that both my girls will be here waiting for me," he replied, gently rubbing her belly while placing a soft kiss on her cheek before leaving to meet Mr. Murray.

The following morning, Matthew and Mary made plans to meet for tea in the afternoon before they separated for the day. After bidding farewell to Mary for the morning, Matthew headed directly to Dr. Johnson's office. Matthew quickly explained to the doctor the fact that Mary's sister had died of eclampsia and that Mary's test results had revealed that she was in danger of developing the same condition.

"Where is your wife? Has your doctor placed her on bed rest?" Dr. Johnson asked.

"No, she has not been placed on bed rest. I simply did not wish to cause her to worry any more than she already is. Dr. Clarkson says that excessive worrying is not healthy for her."

"Dr. Clarkson is correct that worry will do her no good. That being said, knowledge should decrease her worries not increase them. All she knows now is that eclampsia can result a sudden and horrific death such as you witness with her poor sister. Your wife need not share that fate. We know what to watch for and she is being tested regularly. There is no reason to assume that she will cross that line into the true danger zone. And if she does, we act before labor sets on."

"Before?"

"Yes, the on-set of labor is the death knell for women suffering from eclampsia. If labor progresses, the woman will die during the labor or shortly after. Even is an emergency cesarian is preformed, the chances of survival are incredibly slim. The key is to perform the cesarian prior to the on set of labor - to be safe, a few weeks before the babe is due."

"Is that safe?"

"Much safer than allowing natural labor."

"That is not that comforting when you describe labor as a death knell."

"Mr. Crawley, I will not lie and tell you cesarians are without risk, but the procedure has improved greatly in the last few decades. It is commonly performed and relatively safe. The chance of survival is now roughly eighty-five percent if done in a hospital by a well trained doctor."

"Would you be willing to travel to Downton should a cesarian be necessary?"

"Of course. I can be in contact with your local doctor and if her test indicate a rising danger, I shall travel to Downton and preform the operation before natural labor sets in."

"Thank you doctor. You have eased my mind a great deal," Matthew replied. His main worry now was how was he going to explain to Mary why he met with the doctor without her. He had originally thought the meeting would simply provide him the information to allow him to make an informed decision while she was in labor and might have not been coherent enough to make a decision. Now it appeared the decision might need to be made weeks before which he would clearly have to explain to her. He knew she would be angry with him for failing to include her in the meeting. While it was true that he had only excluded her to prevent her from worrying and further endangering her health, he knew she would still be extremely displeased, and in all truth, he would not be able to begrudge Mary her anger. Lord knows he would be angry if the situation were reversed.

On his way to the lobby, he was trying to formulate an explanation and apology when he was shaken by a familiar voice.

"Lady Mary Crawley to see Dr. Johnson."

He rounded the corner and came face to face with his wife who looked just as surprised to see him as she was to see her.

TBC


	20. Chapter 20

Further Down the Line Chapter 20

"Lady Mary Crawley to see Dr. Johnson," Mary said, smoothing her dress nervously.

"Of course. I will let him know you are here," the receptionist replied.

"Thank you," Mary replied, turning around to take a seat in the waiting area. She gasped the moment she turned around and saw her husband standing there staring at her, the shock on his face mirroring her own.

"What are you doing here Mary," he asked, tilting his head and wearing a disapproving look that told her he had a fairly good idea why she was her. It dawned on her in that moment that he was here for the very same reason, to see the same doctor.

"I am here for the same reason you are I would imagine," Mary replied.

"Mr. Crawley, I am so glad I caught you. You left your hat in my office," Dr. Johnson said, handing the hat to Matthew.

"Thank you doctor," Matthew replied, taking the hat but never allowing his eyes to leave Mary's face. "Allow me to present my wife, Lady Mary Crawley."

"A pleasure Lady Mary," the doctor said, hiding his surprise given the fact that Mr. Crawley had said specifically that his wife would not be joining them.

"Lady Mary is your next patient," the receptionist informed the doctor. The tense looks passing between the couple did not escape his notice.

"Indeed. I have a few calls to return. Perhaps you would like to wait in the examination room," the doctor suggested as it was clear that the couple needed time to speak to one another.

"Certainly. Thank you doctor," Matthew said, taking Mary's elbow as he allowed the receptionist to lead them to the examination room. The walk was silent and gave Matthew a much needed moment to collect his thoughts. His first reaction was anger. Yes being angry with her for keeping the same secret he was keeping was hypocritical, but he was angry just the same. Besides, he had a perfectly valid reason to keep it from her. God only knew why she was keeping this from him, more than likely she was just falling back into the old habit of secrecy that she promised to break.

As soon as the receptionist closed the door leaving them alone in the room, Matthew folded his arms across his chest and fixed Mary with an angry glare.

"Don't you get angry with me Matthew Crawley. Not when you are guilty of the exact same thing," Mary warned.

"Perhaps, but I did it to protect you. You know full well that Dr. Clarkson said worry was not good for you - not in your condition. I had no choice in the matter. I had to keep it from you - to protect you. What earthly reason could you have for keeping this from me?" he demanded.

"I did it to protect you too."

"To protect me? I am not the one in danger Mary."

"Not physically, but you are in danger - from yourself," Mary said, causing him to roll his eyes at her.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, thoroughly confused be her responses. Before Mary could reply, Matthew noticed her rub her lower back as a look of discomfort came over her face. He strode quickly across the room, picked up a chair, set it beside her, and urged her to sit. "You see darling, you are unwell. This worry is not good for you."

"It is not the worry that is causing this Matthew. I am big as a house and getting bigger every day. I am bound to be uncomfortable."

"All the same, I will feel better if you sit."

"Very well, I will sit, but then you must listen to me." He nodded his agreement, and she sat in the chair. "When I told you I would not keep secrets from you, I meant it. I felt terrible about keeping this from you, but I really had no choice."

"Mary, I am trying to understand but…"

"Just listen. Matthew, you have a larger sense of guilt than any person I have every met. No, don't protest - it is not meant as a criticism. I knew that if I did nothing and the worst happened, you would be unfairly forced to make life and death decisions for me. If something happened, if I did not survive, you would forever blame yourself."

"Mary I…"

"Oh don't say you wouldn't because we both know you would. I couldn't let you be put in that position, not when I knew what it would do to you. So I thought I would decide before anything happened, to protect you. Last time, when Lavinia died, you weren't yourself - not for so long. I don't want that for you, but more than that, I don't want that to be the Matthew that our child knows. So I thought this way, if I decided and worse did happen, you could despise me if you had to, but not yourself."

Matthew knelt down in front of her and took both her hands in his. "I told you once, I could never despise you Mary - not ever. No matter how angry I may get, no matter how you might infuriate me at times, I will love you until the moment I die."

"So you understand?" she asked hopefully.

"Yes and no. Yes, I understand your reasoning now, and I am not angry. But, no I cannot agree to your plan. This is not something you should have to decide on your own. It is funny, both of us wanting to protect each other in secret. We are so used to making decisions for ourselves and are still new to being together. Perhaps it is time we learn to make important decisions like this together."

"Only if you promise to accept whatever happens without blaming yourself," Mary offered.

"And only if you promise to rest, relax, and try not to worry," he countered.

"I promise," she replied, squeezing his hands.

"So do I," he answered, lifting her hands and kissing each one.

"So tell me what the doctor said," she said.

He was filling her in on his meeting when the doctor joined them. After much discussion and many questions, it was decided that Mary would continue to have weekly tests taken by Dr. Clarkson who Dr. Johnson would consult with weekly. If the levels remained in the danger zone, then Dr. Johnson would travel to Downton and perform a cesarian section two or three weeks prior to when the baby was expected to prevent the onset of labor.

"Thank you doctor. You have allay many of my worries," Matthew said.

"Well that is my job. Now perhaps I can offer you something much more pleasant. Would you like to see if we can hear your baby's heartbeat?"

"You can do that?" Mary asked in wonder.

"It is possible to hear with a stethoscope late in pregnancy depending on the baby's position. You will have to step back up on the examination table though if you wish to try."

Mary quickly complied, anxious to hear the baby that she had thus far only felt. The doctor felt her belly, pushing firmly before stating that he thought the baby was properly positioned to allow them to hear the heartbeat. He put the stethoscope in his ears and after adjusting the position on her belly a few times, he smiled and indicated that he had found it. He held the one end in place on Mary's belly before removing the earpiece and offering it to Mary. Mary eagerly reached for it and looked up to see Matthew smiling in wonderment and patiently waiting his turn.

"You listen first," Mary offered, holding the earpiece out to him.

"What?"

"I got to feel the baby for weeks before you did. I think it only fair you hear him first. Besides, I can afford to be generous when only need to wait a few seconds for my chance," she said with the tender smile that she reserved only for him.

"Thank you darling," Matthew said, truly touched by her offer. He held the earpiece up and soon heard the distinctive thumping of the baby's heart. The huge smile that spread across his face was all the thanks Mary needed. "Oh Mary, I can hear it. I don't think I have ever heard something so beautiful," he said, fighting the tears he felt welling up in his eyes. He could have listened all day, and although Mary looked content to wait until he had his fill, he wanted her to hear this and passed the earpiece to her.

"It sounds so strong," Mary said in wonderment, grinning at Matthew.

"Very strong. A good sign," the doctor agreed. "And now I am sorry to say, but I do have another appointment."

"Yes of course," Mary said, reaching to hand the earpiece back to the doctor.

"Just one more second," Matthew said, intercepting the earpiece and holding it to his ear to hear again just one more time. "Perhaps we should buy one of these for home," Matthew said when he handed it back to the doctor a moment later.

"So you can follow me about the house with it. Goodness, what would Granny and Papa say?" she said with a laugh.

"I hardly care," he admitted as he helped her step down from the table. "I love you darling," he said, lifting her hands to kiss them. She blushed at the fact that he would speak so freely in front of the doctor. While she could not bring herself to speak so freely of her feelings with anyone beyond Matthew present, her face told him all he needed to know - that she felt the same love and happiness he did in equal measure.

TBC

Author's Note: I am sincerely sorry for the delay in this chapter. I hope you are still enjoying it and I will try to get the next chapter out soon. Getting closer to the birth and I am still undecided on the gender of the baby so if you have any thoughts, please share.


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Downton Abbey