Digimon 1. My Secret

*It's my first time writing a fan-fic : sorry if this isn't any good! Please, comment so I can improve on my writing!

Chapter 1: My secret  
Its been years, their adventure has ended; but some things never change. Or do they?

Currently enrolled in first year post-secondary, Takeru, who turned 18 four months ago is failing to improve on his grades. He sighed miserably, looking around the sea of people in the cafeteria, laughing, talking, _not alone._ It's been like this for him every since the dramatic twist of his life ended, he no longer felt needed, important, better yet understood by anyone. This wasn't what little Takeru planned his future to had been, an emotional teen that is scared to let go of his feelings.  
"Hey Hikari, watch this, watch this!" Daisuke popped his head right and left of her shoulders, only to feel more rejection.  
"Hey Tee, you look tired today, want coffee?" Hikaru sat down across from the table and gestured towards the coffee shop packed with other colleages who were drained from their boring lectures.  
"Yeah...that sounds good, a large one cream please!" Pulling out a five dollar bill from his pocket, Hikari smiled and walked off elegantly without taking his money.  
"Heyyyyyyy! Why do you always fight with me!" Daisuke slammed his palms on the table,  
"Why don't you buy your own coffee!"  
Takeru smiled back, pretending to be oblivious, like the first day they've met,  
"What do you mean, I wasn't picking a fight ^_^~"  
"Yea...well...just don't talk next time I'm talking with Hikari!" Daisuke flushed his cheeks as he continued to embarass himself more, almost feeling guilty for accusing Takeru.  
Smiling again, Takeru pulled another Daisuke moment off.

It's been years.  
Takeru continued to act oblivious to Daisuke's jealousy towards his relationship with Hikari.  
Daisuke continued to pick on fights with Takeru, but more and more feels guilty after accusing him every time.  
Hikari continues to stay neutral and secretive about her preferences over the two boys.  
Takeru has been hiding a secret.

Five years ago, Takeru realizes Yamato and Taichi's serious relationship. At first he thought they were just undergoing excessive hormones and the availability was there. But after the "accidental" eavesdropping on their love making and proclaim of love for each other, Takeru gradually accepted Taichi as part of the family. _Yet Hikari is still a good friend, it's too weird he thought sometimes._ What's more to it, is that Takeru has been secretly masturbating to their endless nights as they breathed through the thin walls. It rang in the back of his head every night he laid in bed.

"Ahhh...Taichi...Unnggg...Yeah...That's..Ahhh..the spot..."  
"Mmm..Yamato...you like my fingers...digging deep into you?"  
"Unnng...!" _he moaned again.  
Takeru could see them in his head, Yamato slowly pumping his body as Taichi rubbed and probed his G-Spot with his index and middle fingers while sticking his other fingers into Yamato's wet lips, sucking gently and slowly licking the tips of his new favorite appetizer.  
"Ooh...Yamato you're so tight...you're making me so hard..." Taichi, rubbing his 8 inch slowly around Yamato's inner thighs as he pumps his fingers faster._  
"_Uuungg.." Takeru can hear the desperation in Toto's (When he feels intimate with his brother, he uses Toto as his nickname) groan for more.  
"Suck me off Yama...Show me how much you want it..." Taichi made this slapping sound. Immediately, the bed creaked and soon new sounds were heard.  
"_Ahhh....Ahhh..yeah...Yama...you're hot mouth feels so good..Yes...lick that good...clean me up...Ahh..." Faster bobbing sounds were vibrating through the walls.  
With that, Takeru sprayed his stomach and chest with warm, silky juice and fell asleep exhausted, hugging his pillow as the sounds slowly faded away.  
Toto...he muttered, I'm bi.


	2. Weak and Weaker

*Sorryyy, length wise it's fairly short per chapter, and there probably aren't any improvements on these because I wrote them all ahead of time XD! So here are the next few chapters I wrote in advance. I do realize I'm not a writer, but these all are all my thoughts and I write them when I'm in the mood so bare with me with the horrible grammar and other mistakes! (I don't look back on my work =X)

Ch.2: Weak, and weaker

Laying in bed wet again, Takeru tries to rub his sweat and immoral thoughts off.

Imagining Taichi's bare skin groping against Yamato's, the clashing of the tanned, muscular

toned boy on the white lightly cream colored, Takeru shivers in ecstasy as he jumps to conclusions.

_"Unggg...Ta...Tai...Taichi-kun..!" _with his back arched and his nipple being sucked by the

messy brown-haired boy, beads of sweat were rolling down their foreheads, dipping into their

necks and slowly drifted together in their connecting arms.

Digging his hands onto his rough hair, the fair blonde encourages the other to bury his face

deeper into his hard chest, circling his tongue faster around his left nipple and sucking the hell

out of it as he begins to pump his private all the way in.

_"Ahhh....Taiii...ahh...ahh.."_ arching his chest further into the other boy while encouraging him

to engage in a more suitable speed, Yamato's seductive grunts and moans with his rthymic hip

actions drove Taichi to push his limits.

"Takeru! Come out for breakfast! Taichi made his special omelets, the only thing he's good at!"

_Outside the room were some shuffling noises, followed by Yamato's giggles and finally silence._

_Walking out the room, Takeru finds them making out against the counter.  
_  
"Did you guys even brush your teeth yet? Ick." Takeru shivered at the thought of the stingy

slava sliding through their tongues as their explored each other's caves of delight, swirling,

nibbling, licking...

"Mm...Sorry Keru." Yamato pulls back after giving Taichi another quick peck on the lips.

"You know, we spoiled ya'~" Taichi winks at the younger blonde leaving him blushing from his

explicit visions of Taichi entering Yamato.

Pulling up next to his omlete, Takeru sat down on the dining table across from Yamato.

"And here's yours babe. Noww...." Taichi finishes up their plate by squeezing a heart shape around the colorful egg with ketchup.

"Ohh..Taichi..!" The two boys couldn't keep their hands off each other.

"Uhhh, I'll leave you two alone." Takeru giggled as he grabbed his backpack and walked over to the front door.

"Hey Keru! Ask Hikari how she's doing for me! I haven't been around the house lately because of a little someone..." Taichi's words ended with another endless tonguing action.

"Wait, so how exactly IS Hikari doing, Takeru?" Yamato winked at the boy, who was bent down tying his shoes, almost lost his balance.

"Wh-What do you mean!?" Takeru was flushed as he mustered his face up and pouted towards his onii san.

"He meant to ask if you've gotten into her pants yet." Taichi laughed

"Wh-What! Taichi san! you're ahh! screwing my brother AND expecting me to have way with your sister?!"

...A brief silence between the three.

"Takeru...if you like Hikari, then go for it. Don't let us get in your way...It might be immoral

how we're siblings dating...but...anything for you Keru..." Yamato hasn't spoken in that tone

for ages. The last time Takeru has heard this tenor depressed voice was when their parents

divorced, years ago.

"Onii-san...that's not it...that's not what I meant..."

"Nii-san...I don't feel anything for Hikari...I...I like men..."


	3. Breakdown

Chapter 3: Breakdown

...

"What?! YOU CAN'T!" Yamato hollered at his brother, without hesitating, pulled back from his chair and gave Takeru a deadly glare, so forbidding, it scared Takeru.

"You can't be gay! Ahhhhhhhhh! You are the only one one left in our family to pass on our blood! How would you think mom and dad will take it if they find out their second son is gay too!? No! This can't be happening! What about Hikari!? You..You can't be gay!"  
Yamato slaps his hands on his face and tears started streaming down his palms and through his fingers.

Taichi, still stunned stood frozen with his mouth open and a hand on Yamato's shoulder.

Takeru couldn't believe this was happening. This wasn't what he'd have expected from his one and only brother, who himself is gay. Before he could let a drop of tear slide by, he ran out the house.

Why...why is my life so full of shit? It's not my fault I get turned on by those thoughts of you and Taichi, those porn sites i've secretly used your account under, those magazines you hide under your bed when you were going through them with Taichi...

Why...

Takeru couldn't go to his first class. Neither could he for his second, or third. Numbing himself with those words that struck his heart, he stared out onto the wall of cafeteria, replaying his tragedy.

"Oh don't act like you can't see me! What's your problem!? I came to say hi and you don't even look at me!"

Daisuke slid across the table from Keru, with his legs crossed on the table by Keru's face and arms folded.

"Hey, i'm talking to you!"

He demanded again, pouting at the emotionless, responsiveless blonde.

Grabbing his bag, Takeru stood up.

"I'll talk to you later."

Icy cold words sprung out of his lips.

Takeru has never been less friendly to Dai, ever.

Not even when he accuses him of flirting with 'his Hikari' everyday, nor the time he lied to Takeru to be alone with Hikari, nor the times he irritates Hikari so much she couldn't even stay to talk with Takeru.

Stalking away, Takeru didn't look back.

"Hey!" Daisuke came running infront of Takeru.

"Hey! What's your problem?! What's wrong with you today?! I knew you never liked me all this time but is that how you treat someone you consider you friend?! Or have you ever considered me your friend?! I just wanted to be with someone I like, I've never harmed you! What have I ever done to you?! Huh, answer me! What have I ever done to you to make you treat me this way!?" Daisuke exploded on Takeru.

Luckily, the caf was too large, too many separate groups and too loud. No one focused their attention on the gogglehead boy with spikey brown bed hair who mustered his anger on the pale blonde boy.

"Dai, I have no time for you today. How have I treated you like crap? What makes you think I hate you? How do I not take you as a friend? I sit here everyday, listening to you bullshit at me for saying i'm stealing your Hikari away when all I do is talk to her, it's okay I can put up with that. I can stand you everyday for the past what, three years, when you're the one that stirs things up between us. Before you question my liability to our friendship and the amount of effort I put in, shove those goggles up your ass and use your brain for once. I'm just asking for a day of rest, can't I? I can't even have a day for myself?! Just leave me the fuck alone, even just for today!"

Takeru cried out his last words and runs pass Daisuke, not stopping until he reached the bus stop.

He had never spoken out of his true thoughts and feelings as much as he had in the last three years, than today.


	4. Belong

*Sides from the fact this is my first time writing a fanfic, I also wrote these during my finals! Please excuse my poor writing – since I usually write around 2am. Also, I write when ideas come to me, so if any part feels detached or unrelated, please leave a comment! Spring classes are starting, so I might be a little late on continuing my crappy work of writing, sorry in advance.

Chapter 4: Belong

Takeru slowly dragged himself off the bus back home.

Unlike his usual pace, his legs dragged him around the block like a living zombie.

Of course Yamato must be out for band practices he thought.

Yamato couldn't leave his band issues even if the end of the world was coming, not to mention it was his little brother's problem, not his.

Why would he care?

Smirking at himself, Takeru walked into the house of silence.

Kneeling down infront of the door to his room, he bursted out into tears.

He had no idea why, he just couldn't hold in his irrational emotions that made his knees weak and fall into position.

Streams of tears came rushing down just as he hits the hardwood floor, he couldn't stop crying.

Not that he wanted to, nor did he know why, nor could he control them anymore.

It hurts.

It hurts so much.

He had no idea why he couldn't cry earlier, not when he was alone in the cafeteria, not when he was on the bus.

He couldn't stop them.

They burned his eyelids, tickled his cheeks, irritated the corners of his lips, trickled down to his chin, and finally.

The droplets hit the wooden floor, splashing on the wood, signing itself on the floor like it was meant to be there.

Catching his breath, Takeru picked himself up, sniffing with hands on his chest.

He breathed.

He was alive.

But he couldn't feel life anymore.

His heart was numb, just like his eyes.

The tears he dared not to wipe off his cheeks no longer tickled him.

He, stood emotionless.

Just like this morning, he pushed through the door, locked it with inpercise, and ran to the bus stop.

I have no idea where I'm going... I just wanted to be alone.

I feel numb, I wanted to breathe...am I?

Why can't I feel anything anymore...It's so hard...Life...

_Flipping out his phone, Takeru decided not to turn it on again._

It wouldn't matter... Doesn't matter anymore if he understands or not...

I was looking at the sunset. Hell knows what time it is...__

Lifting up his left sleeve to find his white watch band not there

Must have forgotten it this morning when I rushed out for breakfast...

_Sigh._

The purple velvet sky roamed through his mind, but he couldn't see anything.

It was just like a blur; a mixture of funny dark shaped figures surrounding the violet red, the orange, slowly disappearing on the bottom of the page as the blue purple pulls the dark blanket over.

Stars were decorating themselves in the soothing darkness.

No more light was to be seen.

The bus stopped at its terminal as the black skies pulled over.

Takeru was forced to step off the steps of the bus filled with warm air into the cold windy streets, filled with darkness.

The cold breeze cut through his arms like blades as he shivered with his stomach growling.

It has been breakfast since he ate last... he was so hungry and tired he barely had the strength to carry himself another step. He was so tired...so lost...

He wandered around the streets over an hour now, and his legs could no longer support him.

He knew he was walking towards the school's direction, but he was still two blocks off.

"Ugh..." he muttered as the growing pain from his stomach struck him, his arms were so cold they bared such a weight on his shoulders.

As he walked around the corner, a familiar house flashed at him.

_32608_.

"This...is Daisuke's house..." Takeru muttered, "Ugh.."

He remembered earlier this afternoon when he told Daisuke to leave him alone.

He took another step away the front door, but his stomach and cold told him otherwise. He was out of options.

Pulling himself onto the door, he rang the door bell.  
_  
Once. And Again_.

_No answer.  
_  
His legs could no longer bare with him. He rested against his door as he closed his eyes.

Why...why is life so cruel to him? He blinked his watery eyes and wanted to give up.

It was then, the doors swung open and Takeru fell forward.

"Gah!" Daisuke caught the pale cold blonde as he fell into his arms.

"Takeru? Hey Takeru...! Takeru!"

The frozen pale boy blinked a tear down the corner of his eye as he saw a warm baby face not too far from him.

Something warm hit him for a second.

It was like a beat to the heart, something that seemed long missing in him.

"Daisuke..." he smiled with a tear rolling down his cold icy cheek.


End file.

Digimon, Hurt-Comfort, Romance