Once Upon a Time 1. Chapter 1

a/n: *_inserts 'surprise bitch, i bet you thought you'd seen the last of me' gif_*  
Hello how are we all? good? yes? excellent.  
Now a little heads up, this is all from Emma's point of view.  
If you have read my previous OUAT fic, Queens as Kings, you will all know I how I like my Regina ;) dark, powerful and 150 percent sexy. Like, what's more delightful than squishing all that into a Head Mistress? Hmm? it's like every lesbian's dream, wow.  
Also, I am very aware of the shitty format that it is in. Sorry, sorry, sorry.  
Anyway, happy reading! Please review, amigos!  
x

* * *

Saying I was desperate for work was a complete and utter understatement.

I mean, it had only two weeks ago that my last school let me go. Yeah, good going Maine Falls High School, you bunch of tosspots. You lost your best supply teacher. I may or may not have slipped on some dark shades, and blasted Kanye West through open windows as put my middle finger up to the school as I drove out the grounds. Did I get bonus points for having my passenger seat completely stacked with a teetering pile of 'farewell' gifts and cards from my students and co-workers? No. Damn.

Anyway, I slammed my car door shut and shoved my groceries up onto the roof of my little pride and joy; my little yellow bug. First things were first; I had to locate the front door key before I even thought about going near the house. Not that it was hard; I had like three keys, the rest were stupid tacky key rings from places Henry and I had visited. Speaking of Henry, I glanced over to the door and sighed. Henry definitely had to home because I spotted his scuffed leather school shoes sitting on top the large pile of discarded shoes near the door. I still needed to sort that out.

"Henry Swan, get your butt out here and help your poor Mother bring in the food," I hitched up my black jeans and pulled down my red top, "now!"

"Hello to you too Mum," he yelled out through the screen door. Henry padded out the front door, tip toeing through the prickles that covered the front lawn and grabbed four of the heavy bags, two in each hand. He had literally took over half the shopping in with one go, excellent.

I checked the post and was thoroughly intrigued when I received two letters from Story Brooke College in between a thick pile of bills and junk mail. I bet one was a rejection letter of my job and the other was simply a reprint of that same letter; Story Green State High did that. Double helping of salt in the wound if you ask me.

I stuffed the letters into the single shopping bag that strained in my fingers and waltzed inside the house, banging my heel on the stupid piston-operated screen door.

* * *

I dumped the foodstuffs onto the counter and ran my fingers through my dirty hair as I turned the kettle on. Henry threw himself back onto the couch and slurped loudly from his orange juice box.

"Mum, what's for dinner?" He asked as he flicked through the television channels. I took a seat on one of the bar stools and picked up a pizza voucher.

"I've got a pizza voucher here,"

"Does that mean pizza?" Henry turned around and stared eagerly at me. I waved the voucher in the air,

"No, I'm just stating I have a pizza voucher, not that I'm going to use it,"  
Henry frowned, "Aw damn it,"

I sighed at his stupidity. I mean, he's not stupid but like, I swear some days he's as thick as two short planks.

"Henry that was sarcasm; of course we're getting pizza, Jesus,"

"Hell yeah, can we get the Hawaiian?"

Pizza topping was probably the only thing we both agreed on. Everything else was pretty shot.

"Okay, but we're getting lemonade,"  
"Why not Coke?"

"You know I hate Coke," I scrunched my nose up at him. He sighed and rolled his eyes, typical teenager.

"Oh right, I forgot; you're a Pepsi fan,"

"I still don't get how you hate the stuff, it's great," I pulled the two Story Brooke College letters from the pile and tore open the first one.

"It tastes like Coke Mum,"

"Pretty sure it doesn't," I kept my eyes on the paper but aimed my raised eyebrows at my son who sighed again, "seriously, sigh some more, I dare you,"

Alas, I clearly signed myself up for that. Henry took a deep breath and let out the longest sigh that was humanly possible. I hung my head and I could almost feel Henry's smug grin. The kettle whistled loudly and Henry smirked once more at me as I turned to sort out a cup of black tea. He was so me when I was a kid. I mean, I'm pretty sure I was kicked out of a foster house for being too sassy. I feel like that would be a legitimate thing; being kicked out for sassy mouth, or just maybe kicked out because I did a whole heap of illegal crap when I bordered adulthood, either way.

"Henry, why didn't you tell me you have parent-teacher interviews?" I called over my shoulder as I swirled my spoon.

"Oh. Um, Mum, we have parent-teacher interviews tomorrow night,"

"Thank you Captain Obvious, I received the letter today," I licked the hot spoon and chucked it into the sink.

"Oh, well, um…"

I tucked my foot under my thigh as I perched myself awkwardly back onto the stool. I reread over the letter,

'_Good Day Ms Swan, three of Henry Swan's teachers have requested an interview with you on the evening of the 15th. The interviews will be held at the school hall starting at 5pm._

_Yours Sincerely, Regina Mills, Head Mistress_'

"Henry who is Ms Mills," I asked as I took a nervous sip of my scolding hot tea. Henry shrugged his shoulders heavily,

"She's the new Principal,"  
I eyed her neat little signature, "what happened to Mr Gold?"

"Eh, I don't know. I think he retired or something," Henry crushed the empty juice box and threw it onto the coffee table. I knew he'd forget about it later but I was too tired to even argue with him.

"Shame, I liked Gold. Okay, I'm calling the pizza place, keep quiet,"

I picked up the cordless phone that had been tossed into the fruit bowl, and dialled the local pizza house. As the phone rung, I ripped open the second letter from Story Brooke College. The school's golden emblem flashed blindly from the top corner,

"_Thanks for calling Mario's Pizza Place; what can I get you tonight?_" I rested the phone between my ear and shoulder,

"Yeah hi, can I get two Hawaiians and a bottle of lemonade,"  
"_Garlic bread?_"

"Nope, just that thanks,"

"_Okay, will that be picking up or we can deliver it for an extra charge_,"

"Drop off please," I told the girl my address and last name then hung up.

"It'll be here in twenty," I said to Henry as I sat back down, staring at the shiny emblem.

I gawked at the letter, rereading it for the fourth time.

Story Brooke College had accepted my application. They wanted me to work for them. _Me_.

"Henry…?"

"Yeah,"  
"I got a job,"

Henry jumped off the couch and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, "that's so cool Mum, where at?" He glanced down at the letter in my hands and gasped at the familiar emblem, "wait, what?"

"Yeah, uh, surprise. Story Brooke wants me,"

"But that's my school. Ugh, are you going to embarrass me in front of my friends? What happens if you take one of my classes…Mum, why did you even apply there?"

"I was desperate alright! But trust me Henry, I will be a delight," I pointed to the set dates I was to work, "look, it's only for a term and a bit, you'll be fine,"

Henry pressed his lips onto my temple, "fine, but I swear if you embarrass me, I won't acknowledge your presence for a week,"

"Fine, deal," I knew that was lie. I mean, I cooked him dinner every night. He couldn't ignore that. He loved my cooking.

"Anyway, now back to the main issue here; why didn't you tell me about parent-teacher interviews?" I folded the acceptance paper up and slipped it into the back pocket of my jeans.

"I'm not trying to hide anything; I swear I totally forgot,"

"Uh huh, okay," I kissed him on the cheek and ruffled his hair, "now I have interviews with Ms Blanchard, Mr Nolan and Ms Midas,"

"Okay, Blanchard is English and History, Nolan is Science, and Midas is Maths,"

"Good, easy," I nodded and made a mental note. There was a loud knock on the door. I grabbed my purse and opened it. A spotty faced teen stood with a stupid cap on his greasy head, holding two pizzas. His eyes openly grazed my body and I swear I could've punched him.

"Uh, two Hawaiian pizzas for Swan?" he scrunched up his order and shoved the pizzas into my arms. I handed them down to Henry and pulled cash from my wallet.

"Here, keep the change," I slammed the door before the boy could get another good look at me, "creep". I grabbed a slice from the freshly opened boxes and moaned; maximum cheese, maximum pineapple, the best combination.

"I love pizza," Henry mumbled, his mouth full.

"Mm," I sat down again and helped myself to a second piece, "Mario's does it best,"

"Damn straight," Henry twisted open the lemonade and poured two glasses.

"After dinner, you need to do your homework and I need to get ready for work,"

"Are you starting tomorrow?" Henry swallowed loudly and reached out for a third slice,

"No, I start next week but I need to organise and wash all my teacher clothes and stuff,"

"Okay," Henry guzzled down his lemonade and poured himself a second glass,

"No, only one glass," I took the cup from his fingers and downed the drink, waggling my eyebrows, "you have school tomorrow Henry; I will not have you bouncing on walls tonight,"

"Ugh, yes Ms Swan," Henry emphasised our last name and I just poked my tongue out to him like the true adult I am.

"Better get used to that kid,"

Henry rolled his eyes as he picked up the left over pizza. I watched him slide the two pizzas together into the one box and stuck it in the over packed fridge.

"Now, when I open that tomorrow morning, will that pizza land on me?"

Henry shrugged his shoulders as he slammed the fridge door close; rattling the fridge magnets,

"Probably,"

"Stick a note on the fridge or something because I'm going to forget. Now, I'm going to organise my stuff for tomorrow. Can I trust you not to set fire to the house?"

"Why would I set fire to the house?"

"Because the speed you will be writing your homework down will cause friction and next minute, your book and the kitchen table will be ablaze,"

"Because that'll definitely happen," Henry teased as he stuck a yellow Post It note to the fridge marked with 'Pizza'.

"You never know," I pulled Henry to my chest and kissed him on the top of his head, "night homie, see you tomorrow,"

* * *

a/n: DO YOU LIKE IT? I mean, my new found style of writing? yes? no? please leave some reviews you delightful balls of excellence. Cheers! x  
PS I have already written like ten chapters of this...


	2. Chapter 2

a/n: Whoa, an next day update? Go me. Please don't get comfortable with me updating every night, it probably won't happen too often :( Butttttttt, here we are.  
I'm going to try and update three times a week or like whatever, but I can't promise anything next week because I'm on holiday in the British channel islands, weow!

If you'd like to talk to me, I do have tumblr. Feel free to chat to me at ant1ers. tumblr . com and my name is Emma!

* * *

"Mum, guess what!" Henry surged through the front door, his backpack swinging precariously from one shoulder. I looked over from the stove at my sweaty faced child.

"Good grief, what happened to you?" I stirred the spaghetti as Henry pulled off his shoes, not bothering with the laces.

"It's about Ms Mills, guess what?"

I rolled my eyes, "you can't tell me bad things about my new boss, Henry, and you know that,"

"It's not bad…it's like, interesting…"

"And what is considered interesting to a thirteen year old boy?"

"I totally saw her kissing another teacher,"

I stopped stirring and raised my eyebrows, "what?"

"Yeah Mum, it was so weird. Like, wow, Ms Mills,"

"She's allowed to kiss who she wants to kiss," I shrugged my shoulders,

"Yeah but Mum, she was kissing Ms Lucas,"

Now that got my attention. Regina Mills was gay? Oh boy, this could very, very interesting. Henry had clearly misinterpreted my raised eyebrows as a sign to continue,

"Like, Ms Lucas was taking my afternoon class because Ms Nova was away today, and Ms Mills came in after class. I remembered I left my pencil case on the desk and I went in and Ms Mills was totally kissing Ms Lucas,"

"Is that weird for you?" I slammed a frying pan down on the stove a little more aggressively than I intended,

"Nah, of course not Mum. I mean, you're gay so it doesn't bother me at all," Henry pulled his books from his bag and splayed them out on the table.

"Okay, good," I released a pent up breath and chunked chopped vegetables into the pan, "I raised you well,"

"Duh, I'm an angel,"

"Let's see about that tonight at the interviews, huh?" I poured tomato paste into the pan and stirred vigorously as Henry groaned. Finishing off my coffee, I glanced up at the clock; 3:47pm.

"We're going to have dinner when we get back okay," I took the pan off the heat and picked up some raw spaghetti with my fork, "it's too early to eat now." I stuck the fork into my mouth and yelped at the hot pasta.

"Okay, but I'm going to have a shower before we go,"

"I was really hoping that. And get changed; I won't have you there with a sweaty uniform. I need a good first impression,"

"Mum, all the teachers know me. It's you that needs to make the impression,"

"I know, trust me. I have the perfect outfit and don't laugh at me when I have to speak all prim and proper, okay?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Henry headed down the hallway to his bedroom. God knows I need to make a good first impression. I need as many teachers on my side as possible, and I needed to look the part and speak the part. I'll probably ease it off the longer I've worked there, but I didn't know what I was up against, like, was Story Brooke like one of those proper schools, or just relaxed and carefree?

"I'm in the shower," Henry yelled from down the hall before slamming the bathroom door closed. I really need to teach that boy how to close doors properly. I turned off the stove and drained the spaghetti in the sink. Combining the tomato paste and vegetables with the pasta, I tossed them together like the lettuce leaves in a salad before dumping it into a plastic container and sticking it precariously underneath last night's pizza.

"Awesome, time to get changed," I breathed as I headed into my own bedroom. I was glad my room had a bathroom of its own or I would have thrown Henry out and sprayed him with a hose. Not literally…maybe.

* * *

I stared at myself in the full length mirror, pulling a loose thread from my top. You couldn't get much more 'respectable parent who's also a teacher' than this. My hair was in a high pony tail and my old faithful black rimmed glasses sat on the bridge of my nose. I had stuck a small stud into my nose piercing, hoping that the little blue gem wouldn't bring too much attention. I wore my favourite blue blouse with the sleeves rolled up to my elbows, with it tucked into my black high waisted trousers. And of course, my black flats. Definitely respectful, definitely does not show the fact I am borderline unemployed.

"Mum, are you good to go? It's like 4:30,"

"Shit," I grabbed my purse and keys from my bed and exited the room. Henry was tying the laces of his red Converse sneakers as I grabbed a glass of water from the tap.

"Whoa Mum, you look nice,"

"Thanks kid, I'm trying to pull off the whole 'I'm actually a teacher, please hire me' look,"

"It's working. Let's just hope we run into Ms Mills tonight then hey? I'm sure she'll be happy to see you're totally eager to work,"

I grimaced as I tried to picture what this Ms Mills even looked like. Was she blonde? Was she a brunette? Was she tall or short? Fat or thin?

As I locked the door behind me, Henry took the passenger seat and tried to squash down his flyaway hair in the rear view mirror.

"Trying to impress someone are we?" I smirked as I hopped into the driver's seat; I flicked off my flats.

"No…" Henry blushed as he quickly paid attention to the tree next to the car.

"That's fine kid; you don't need to tell me" I started the car and reversed down the driveway, "just want to let you know that you have a toothpaste stain on your collar,"

I watched Henry in the corner of my eye as he pulled his collar away from his chest, spotted the stain and started rubbing it ferociously.

* * *

I kind of knew my way around the school but I let Henry guide the way. He constantly wiped his palms on his jeans as we neared the massive hall; the lights were illuminated in the fading light and there was a loud murmur coming from the open doors and windows. We ascended the steps and Henry took a deep breath as he pushed open the door.

It was the classic set up. The enormous hall was divided by departments and the teacher's lined up alphabetically, with two hard plastic chairs on the other side of their small table. I yanked the letter from my purse and scanned the appointment times.

"First up is Midas," I popped my lips loudly as I scanned the Maths section. Henry pointed to a pretty middle aged woman with dark blonde hair, who was talking animatedly with another student,

"Okay, she should be done soon with that dude, so where can I find Nolan?"

Henry pointed to a male teacher leaning back in his chair, staring into space, "that's Mr Nolan,"

"And what about Blanchard,"

My son stood on the tips of his toes as he searched the English bit, his eyebrows furrowing,  
"I can't see her…wait," He pointed to Mr Nolan again and I realised he had been joined by a small pixie haired woman holding two cups of coffee.

"Sweet," I tucked the paper back into my pocket and I noticed that Henry was quite preoccupied with the Creative Arts department. I followed his gaze and noted he was staring intently at a young brunette teacher with bright red lips. I raised my eyebrows at him but he didn't seem to notice,

"Henry?"

"Yeah," but he didn't take his eyes off the other teacher,

"Who's the lady over there with the brown hair and super bright red lips?"

Henry whitened and stammered, "uh, I, um,"

I glanced back to the brunette and realised she was coming towards us. I frowned at my son as he stared at the floor.

"Ah Henry," she gushed, smiling brightly at Henry, but he simply avoided eye contact. She looked up at me and pouted, "He's usually quite happy to see me. I'm sorry, Hi I'm Ms Ruby Lucas, Henry's Creative Arts teacher," she shook my hand and I complimented her on her chunky wolf ring. So this was the lady who made out with Regina Mills and somehow captured my son's heart. I'd probably have to chat to her about that once I started working.

"Hello Ms Lucas," Henry mumbled, shuffling away slightly from myself and Ruby. I sighed and ruffled his hair,

"Hey, I'm Emma Swan"

"Wait; are you chick who's taking over Ashley Boyd's place next week?"

"Yeah, that's me," I smiled. All I knew was that Ashley was going on maternity leave.

"Awesome; Ash has some excellent classes and the kids here are a breeze," She grinned down at the still very red faced Henry, "such as your son Henry. Did he tell you he's got the second highest mark in my class?"

I was shocked. I never knew Henry had a thing for the Arts, "No? Henry why didn't you tell me,"

He shrugged, "I didn't think it was important,"

"It's pretty impressive as I have one of the biggest Creative Arts classes in the school,"

I snorted, "Let me guess, it's all boys,"

Ruby laughed and her eyes sparkled, "Ah Ms Swan, I see you know the problems faced by us pretty teachers," she nudged me in the side playfully and I knew that this lady was definitely going to help when I started work.

"I see there is a couple of us here," I jutted my chin over to the black pixie haired woman was mid laugh with Mr Nolan,  
"Yeah, but you should see the Marine Biology teacher, good lord," Ruby fanned herself dramatically,

"I'm going to the toilet," Henry disappeared outside. I knew he found this conversation awkward. Ruby watched him leave before turning her full attention to me,

"I mean, damn he is so attractive. And he's single!" Ruby squeaked, her eyes searching the Science department, "ugh, good old Hook didn't come tonight," she pouted. I smiled weakly at her,

"Ah yeah, I probably wouldn't find him attractive," I mumbled nervously.

"Why? Come on, all the chicks drool over him and all the guys have constant boners around Regina. We have a bunch of hot staff here at Story Brooke,"

"Regina?" Oh hell yes, she was hot. This makes everything so much sweeter. Ruby eyed me suspiciously,

"Yeah, Regina; she runs the show," She pointed to an empty spot down the back of the room where a stack of files sat next to a fresh cup of coffee, "total babe,"

"Hope so," I cleared my throat.

Ruby eyed me as I blushed, "Ah lady's lady, then," she waved her hand, "nah, it's all good. I'm a fan of the odd lass too. Your secret is safe with me," she nudged me again and gasped, "shit; I've got a student waiting for me. Nice talking to you Emma, I'll see you next week," she waved again and skipped back to her seat.

I found Henry sitting on the stairs staring out into the empty school grounds. I sat down next to him, resting my chin on my knees,

"Hey,"

He glanced to me and crossed his arms, "hey,"

"So, Ms Lucas huh," Even in the dark I could see him blush, "she's a pretty lady, I'm not going to deny that,"

He glanced at me with wide eyes, "No, you're not going to take her away from me? You're not going to date her are you?"

"Whoa, calm down. No of course not. I don't even know the woman" I held my hands out in defence, "she's nice and I'm not that mean, honestly. She's all yours," He smiled as I wrapped my arm around his shoulders.

"She's so nice to me," he mumbled into my shirt,

"I know," Behind us, a loud bell rang and there was a sudden shuffle of chairs.

"Time to shine kid, get ready to impress me," I pulled him off the cement stairs and guided him inside, whispering encouraging words into his ear.

* * *

"All in all, I think Henry would do well with some more reading, but apart from that, Henry is above his target mark this year," Ms Blanchard smiled, scribbling some words down on the piece of paper in front of her. Blanchard was the final teacher of the evening and I was dying to spot this Regina. Ruby had said such promising words about her and I couldn't help but glance nervously around the hall. I didn't even know what she looked like and yet I was still looking for her.

"That's great news Henry, I'm proud of you," I planted a kiss on his head and Ms Blanchard smiled again.

"I don't mean to be rude, but do you mind if I speak to Henry alone for a couple of minutes? I have some boring school stuff I need to talk to him about,"

"Yeah sure," I got up and headed towards the door, watching my son interact with the black haired woman.

"See you next week Ms Swan," Ruby smirked as she exited the building, her work tucked under her arm.

"Yeah, see you later Ruby," I waved to the woman as she disappeared.

"So, you are the infamous Emma Swan?" A sinfully deep voice asked me from behind. I spun around and I'm pretty sure if my mouth wasn't already open from saying goodbye to Ruby, it would be on the floor. Dressed in a slate grey pantsuit with the jacket slung over her arm, the woman oozed authority...authority that I would kill someone to be under. Her black lace-clad breasts pressed against the sheer white top she had tucked into her trousers. Holy shit, the woman was gorgeous. There was no way in hell she was teacher. Or if she was one, these kids were the luckiest little fuckers in the world. She had to be a Mum or something. Good lord.

She smirked at my facial expression and I quickly shut my mouth, "yeah uh, hello". The woman offered a perfectly manicured hand to me and I shook it gingerly,

"Good evening Ms Swan, my name is Regina Mills".

Oh sweet Jesus. This was Regina Mills. Ruby was not lying; total babe, she was off the scales of hotness. I'm pretty sure she rewrote the laws of the hot scale.

Regina did not hide her appreciative gaze on my body and I swear I was shivering under her lustful glare.

"I daresay, I made an excellent choice in choosing you," her eyes lingered on my open blouse.

"Yeah, I hope so. I mean," I squeezed my eyes shut. Damn it I couldn't even talk sense, "I know so, because you picked me,"

Smooth as hell, Emma Swan.

Regina just smiled and her teeth were so white, like, blindingly white.

"Mum, I'm done!" Henry tapped me on the elbow and even though I loved Henry with all my heart, I just wanted to push him back and chat longer with angel in front of me.

"Hello Ms Mills, how are you tonight?" Henry asked politely,

"Much better now that I have chatted with your delightful Mother. Have a lovely evening Henry," Regina rearranged the paperwork in her hands and downed the last of her coffee, "Ms Swan, I will send your schedule via email and we will chat on Monday. Good night,"

The goddess left me, open mouthed and staring after her.

"Oh Mum, your face is priceless," Henry giggled as Ms Blanchard joined us.

"What's so funny Henry," she smiled,

"My Mum just met Ms Mills,"

Ms Blanchard rolled her eyes at me as I watched Regina pull out the parking lot in a black Mercedes. Regina glanced back up at me and I am definitely, positively sure she winked at me. Holy damn, she was so hot, how did this even happen.

"It's seems that Ms Mills has that impression on everyone, particularly the fathers here tonight. But none the less," Ms Blanchard sighed, "Each to their own. Goodnight Emma, goodnight Henry, make sure you bring your book in tomorrow for English,"

* * *

a/n: I fucking wish I had a teacher like Ms Mills when I was in high school...  
Oh wait, I did ;)


	3. Chapter 3

a/n: if you know me from queens as kings, you will remember a little friend of mine called mr hose. I will mention him when smut be ah-comin' ;) because we all need an icy cold splash of water after reading smut? yes? excellent.  
sadly, he will not be required in this chapter but keep your eye out for him soon because oooooh baby.  
love, me (Emma)! or ant1ers. tumblr. com :) come say hey, I'm a nice lass, I promise! x

* * *

I pulled into the driveway, my heart still thumping a hundred kilometres an hour.

"Well, that went well. I'm pretty proud of you right now, Kid," I smiled and pulled my hair out of the ponytail. Was my hair really that tight all night? Good lord. Massaging my head, Henry smiled at me,

"Thanks Ma,"

"And you've got a few groovy teachers too; I think I'm looking forward to Monday,"

"By groovy, you mean Regina," Henry nudged me in the shoulder as I rolled my eyes,

"Ms Mills to you Henry, but yeah," I sighed as I yanked open the front door, the cream metal frame caught me in the shin.

"Holy shit,"

"Mum!" Henry chastised as I held my shin in pain. I hated this door more than anything in this world. I seriously needed to change it or burn it or… do something.

"I'm allowed to swear if I get hurt,"

"You don't let me do that,"

"That's because you're like twelve," I seethed as I hopped into the kitchen, tugging open the fridge door,

"I'm thirteen Mum, sheesh,"

"Whatever, I was off by like, twelve months," Chucking the spaghetti onto the counter, I grabbed two bowls and some forks, "hope you like cold spaghetti," I chimed as I grated some cheese on top of my overloaded bowl.

"Gross. Can you microwave mine?"

"What am I, your maid? Get in here and do it yourself. You've got two legs," I sat down on the bar stool and ate hungrily. Checking out and assessing hot co-workers really took it out of me. I had assessed most of the staff and it was a smallish school which was good so less kids per class. Maine Falls had a habit of sticking thirty odd kids in each class because the school had such a huge catchment area.

Henry sighed loudly and stuck his bowl into the microwave and pressed go. The bowl whirred around as he rested his forehead against my shoulder,

"What's up?" I awkwardly patted his head,

"Nothing, I just like resting my head on you,"

"Well, that's awfully affectionate,"

"Yeah, whatever; your shoulders comfy and squidgy,"

"Yeah, and I'm trying to eat dinner here," I motioned to the half-eaten bowl in front of me, "your fat head on my shoulder is seriously reducing my fork to mouth ratio by like, more than half,"

He laughed and fetched his dinner from the microwave, "I swear food means more to you than I do,"

I shrugged, "some days, that statement is correct. But right now I'm happy with you and your progress, considering you only moved there at the start of the year,"

"Thanks Mum," Henry shovelled a heaping fork of steaming pasta into his large mouth and instantly sucked in a breath, "hot, hot," he fanned his mouth.

"Tends to happen when you eat straight from the microwave," I splashed cold water onto my bowl to rid the excess sauce and stuck it into the dishwasher, "after you stick your bowl in, can you put it on? Thanks," I kissed him on the head and sidled towards the Mac computer.

"Mum, you're not going to play solitaire all night, are you?"

I woke the computer and clicked the card game, "Maybe,"  
"That's such an old person's game,"

"I am an eighty six year old woman stuck inside a thirty three year old woman's body,"

I tucked my leg underneath my other thigh and began to play.

"No, you are a ten year old in a thirty three year old body,"

I poked my tongue out at him just to solidify his statement, "Shut up and do your homework kid. You heard Blanchard, you need to read and stuff,"

Henry sighed and grumbled as he sat down to the dinner table to start his small pile of revision.

* * *

Monday came around a little quicker than I originally planned. I mean, it wasn't like I was nervous or impatient or almost constantly checked the clock every two hours.

Henry was doing his typical Monday morning routine; feigning sickness and throwing pillows at me when I tried to wake him. Henry was definitely mine, through and through.

I couldn't be bothered dealing with it this morning, not when Ms Regina Mills had sent an email two days ago, stating that I am to meet her immediately in her office when I arrive. She had included a basic outline of what my job entailed and I was extremely relived but also ridiculously anxious at the fact I was taking two subjects and not just Ashley's history class. Turns out, Ashley was one of those weird teachers who trained in two subjects that did not complement each other, at all. So not only was I taking a history class but also a sports class. Not that it mattered; I liked both classes and was glad I was able to get out of the theory based classroom of history with the practical side of sport.

I wrangled myself into a pair of reasonably clean black trousers from the back the big plush chair that I somehow managed to fit into my room. It was my reading chair cross second wardrobe.

Today felt like a messy bun kind of day so I yanked the thick toothed comb through my messy locks and tied it up. I slithered into one of my frilly bras that I kind of used to seduce people. Not that anybody complained.

"Mum, do you want me to make you some toast?" Henry called from the kitchen.

"Yeah, you know how I like it," I yanked a low cut white tank top and tucked it in.

"Lightly toasted with no butter and heaps of strawberry jam, got it," There was a bang from the kitchen as Henry clearly slammed the silverware drawer shut.

I might as well crack out the red leather jacket. I grinned at my pride and joy as I slipped it over my shoulders and strung a thin red belt through the loops of my slacks. Sassy librarian meets red leather. I smiled at my reflection as I slipped my glasses on and checked to make sure my nose piercing was still in.

"Come and get it Ma,"

I grabbed my packed handbag and exited to the kitchen where Henry was dressed haphazardly in his school uniform; his white shirt untucked with his gold and purple striped tie hanging loosely around his neck.

"You know we're leaving soon right?" I shoved a piece of my toast into my mouth and dumped the bag onto Henry's scattered homework from last night.

"Yeah, it's all good," He smiled as he finished his toast, "I just got to brush my teeth and put shoes on,"

"And sort out your homework. I will not have you failing while I am working there,"

Henry sighed and I noticed he didn't even have matching socks on.

"You're never like this,"

"I have to make a good impression with Ms Mills. Now hurry up, I'm not going to be late,"

* * *

Henry demanded I drop him at least a block down from the school to save him from the embarrassment. He slammed his door and smiled quickly back at me as I took off and entered the staff car park. Parking beside a pale blue Getz, I panicked slightly when I saw Regina's shiny black Mercedes sitting in the 'Principal' spot just near the school office. Everything was going to be fine. I am not going to embarrass myself and I know that Ruby is here. She's my friend…sort of.  
I grabbed my stuff from the backseat and closed the door shut. Checking my appearance in the window, I noticed a man wandering through the cars behind me. I spun around and felt a tug on my jacket. Of course, I had closed my shirt in the door. This man was clearly another teacher and he just smiled softly at me,

"Hey girlie, you ok?" his voice was gruff as he grabbed my bag from my arms as I struggled with the stupid.

"Yeah, I'm cool. I just…" I pulled the door open and my jacket had a nice crease in it, "locked my jacket in the door,"

The short man raised an eyebrow at me, "okay. Uh, hi by the way, I'm Leroy," I snatched my bag from the blushing man and offered him my hand,

"Hey, I'm Emma,"

"New here then, I'm guessing?" He followed me up to the main office and held the door open for me. I thanked him and noticed there were other teachers in here. I took a deep breath to steady myself. I'm sure they're all nice. This is a decent school. Henry hasn't said anything bad about any of them.

"Yeah, how could you tell?" I laughed nervously,

"Well, I've not seen you around so," Of course. Bloody hell, good job me.

"Oh shit, right, sorry. I'm taking Ashley Boyd's classes while she's on leave," Leroy nodded and smiled as another teacher came over.

"You must be Ms Swan," she offered a wide smile, "I am Astrid Nova,"

"Whoa, pretty celestial name you've got," I smiled back and Leroy stood awkwardly beside me like Henry did when I spoke to Ruby. Wait. I glanced at Leroy and realised Nova winked at him. Oh here we go. These two are totally banging.

"My parents were quite the hippies. Mum had a thing for the stars,"  
"That's pretty cool though. Uh, sorry I don't mean to be rude, but I need to see Regina before the bell goes,"

"Yeah sure, her office is just down there to the left," She pointed down a white hallway lined with mismatched photographs.

"Thanks,"

I followed the hall until I reached a dark brown door with Headmaster etched into it. Clearly they hadn't changed since Gold had left. I gave a tentative knock and pushed the door open,

"Yes? Oh Ms Swan, please come in,"

Somehow Regina Mills had gotten hotter since I last saw her, like ridiculously hotter. She wore a deep red dress that hugged all her glorious curves. Regina's mid length hair sat perfectly in soft waves that framed her olive face. She closed her laptop and pushed it aside, readjusting her crossed legs as I took a seat.

"Well, good morning Ms Swan and welcome to Story Brooke College," I twitched nervously as she pulled the hem of dress over her bare knee. Good grief she was killing me and I didn't even have my hands on her. Not that I would have my hands her, clearly she fancied brunettes and last time I checked, Ruby was a brunette and I was not.

"Didn't get too lost I presumed?" a smile tugged at the corner of her rosy red lips. I'd like to kiss that cheeky smirk right off her mouth. No, Emma, clean thoughts; this is your boss, your very hot, attractive, boss.

"Nope, I had help from Leroy,"

"Good, nice to see you've already met a couple of my staff members," Regina pulled a pair of glasses from the drawer beside her and slipped them on. Holy hotness, please for the love of God, I hoped she pulls them off seductively and flips her hair. Please.

"Now," she glanced at me over the top of her glasses, "down to business. You are taking Ashley Boyd's classes for approximately two months. If she requires more time, I can only assume you will stay for longer," I nodded as she flicked through some papers in front of her, "Ms Boyd has two classes. She runs a History class with Ms Mary Margaret Blanchard and a Sports class by herself. Her schedule is quite bizarre but none the less" Regina passed me two copies of my new timetable. It was easy to understand. She rested the end of her pen on Monday, "Mondays and Thursdays are Ashley's sports days. You are the practical teacher for this, so you won't have to mark much," She smiled softly, her eyes grazing over my low cut top. It felt like someone was hold a flame against my cheeks, I was so embarrassed but also extremely pleased. Regina might be into Ruby but that Art teacher has nothing on my tits. Regina cleared her throat and moved the pen to Tuesday, "Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays are your History days. Ms Blanchard takes the class on Mondays and Thursdays when you have Sport. Now, this class has marking and you will share the work load with Mary Margaret, simple?"

"Yeah, so Monday is Sport, Tuesday and Wednesday is History, Thursday is Sport and Friday is History,"

"Precisely,"

"Easy enough,"

"Now Ms Swan, because you are new, I will be regularly checking on you. Most of the time, I will not let you know and possibly surprise you mid-lesson. You must be on your ball at all times". Regina's said coolly and her brown eyes sparkled as she leaned back against her leather chair. "If you pass my test, I might even offer you a full time position,"

Wow, full time working for this hunk of hotness. I see no problems with that, at all. It's like a dream come true.

"Okay,"

"That's all Ms Swan. Feel free to report back to me at the end of the day. I'd like to know how your first day went," And she did it; that hot as 'pull-off-the-glasses-and-flick-the-hair' move. I'm so glad I was still sitting down because I'm sure I would have fallen over or possibly thrown myself over the desk so my head was right in her lap.

"I, uh, yep sure," I stood up on weak legs and accidentally knocked my timetable from the desk. Shit, good going Swan. They skimmed across the carpeted floor and landed just by the open door.

"Shit, I dropped my timetable," I mumbled as I quickly grabbed the first one which was sitting directly under a large corkboard pinned with a dozen colourful flyers.

"I can see that,"

She's sassy _and_ hot. It's like a win-win combination.

I had to suppress my childish need to eye roll and scooped up the other piece. Glancing over to Regina, I noticed she quickly peeled her eyes off my ass. Clearly caught in the act, she grabbed her laptop and opened it up.

"I look forward to our meeting this afternoon. Can you close the door on your way out," She didn't bother looking at me as she typed away.

"Yeah me too," I shoved the papers into my handbag and slipped quietly out the room, pulling the door closed behind me. Holy shit, Regina Mills was going to kill me and there was no way in hell I was going to stop her.


	4. Chapter 4

a/n: a nice long chapter for you lovelies! also I just realised I should probably mention the fact I'm Australian and our education system is hella different to everybody else. In this story' Story Brooke College' is kinda like a high school? so kids from the age of 11 to 18 attend it! I went to a College like this when I lived in Australia so I'M SUPER SORRY FOR THE CONFUSION.  
PS sexual references in this chapter, weow.  
Enjoy ;) ;) Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)  
please review! x

* * *

"…And that's basically the French Revolution in a nutshell," I cleared my throat and turned the classroom lights back on. My students glared as their sensitive eyes became accustomed to the florescent light. I had quickly made a PowerPoint on Napoleon, just to fill in this extraordinarily short lesson. There was a slow clap from the doorway and Regina was leaning against the frame, watching me,

"Very good Ms Swan," she chimed as I grabbed all my things together from the teacher's desk. I sighed and dismissed my class as the bell rung loudly.

"Don't forget your homework; you'll get the wrath of not only Ms Blanchard but also me,"

"Ms Blanchard wouldn't hurt a fly Miss," one of the boys grumbled.

"Oh I've seen the way she attacks her salad in the staffroom, I beg to differ," I grinned as the boy laughed. Regina waltzed over, rested her hands on the edge of the desk and pushed out her chest. The boy wished Regina and I a good day and Regina bit her lips as her eyes grazed over my body. You know, I wasn't really going to tell Regina to stop it because it was definitely an ego burst of epic proportions. I think Regina knew that too because I flicked the ends of my messy hair over my shoulder and wiped the board down for Mary Margaret.

"So Ms Swan, you have been here a week so far, how are you liking things?"

I scrubbed a particularly annoying spot of marker in the bottom corner and furrowed my eyebrows, "Ruby wasn't lying. This place is a breeze to work in," I dropped the duster and leaned against the board, crossing my arms and ankles.

Regina was clearly suppressing a disgusted facial expression and cleared her throat, "Ruby, as in Ruby Lucas," she pulled a pencil from the mesh tin on the desk and fiddled with it,

"Yep, that's the one," I raised my chin slightly. Ruby and I had become quite close and even though Regina was the hottest thing walking around this school, I was not going to let her badmouth Ruby.

"Hmm, what else did she say?" Regina stuck the pencil back and lifted her eyes to mine.

"That…that, uh," I was totally tongue tied. I mean, I'm pretty sure Regina was looking at me with lust. Like, is that even possible? No, stop it. Oh my God, "That um, the Head Mistress was a total babe".

Did I really just say that? Oh boy, yes I did. Go me. I might as well start packing up my desk in the staffroom now. But Regina lowered her head and chuckled.

"Oh, she is quite the dear isn't she?" Regina ran her tongue over her bottom lip.

"Well, she wasn't kidding,"

Where the actual hell was this sudden burst of courage coming from? Had someone slipped bourbon into my coffee this morning? Good grief.

Regina's head shot up and she stared wide eyed at me. Yep, I'm definitely fired.

"I beg your pardon,"

"I mean, Ruby wasn't lying. You are quite beautiful,"

"I, uh," Regina lowered her head as a blush crept up her neck and pinked her cheeks, "thank you Ms Swan. As are you,"

Whoa, what? This is supremely excellent development, holy good Lord.

"Thanks," I grinned widely at her and brushed her shoulder as I went to leave.

"On the contrary of what you've heard, Emma, I am not seeing Ms Lucas,"

I froze. Why the hell would she bring that up? Did she want something from me or simply telling me that because I am Ruby's friend?

"The other day, my son saw you with Ruby," I tried to swallow the lump in my throat. I didn't want to turn around and face her; I felt stronger not looking into her brown eyes.

"That was a simple misunderstanding Ms Swan,"

"How could my son misinterpret a kiss, Ms Mills?"

"I was simply relaying information into Ruby's ear,"

"Oh," I turned around and face Regina. I felt kind of stupid. But maybe Henry was seeing things because he was so damn into Ruby Lucas.

"But," Regina raised a single finger at me, "Henry was not mistaken. Yes, I have kissed Ruby but we were both quite drunk at an end of year staff party. Rumours flew and they still are still quite flying, Ms Swan,"

Hell yeah, this school had end of year staff parties with alcohol. I wonder if I will be invited to the next one. I guess if I get onto Regina's good side, I might be.

Like, who wouldn't want to see a very drunk, flirty Ms Mills? I mean what. No, she kissed Ruby, damn it.

"Ah, okay," I smiled weakly and clutched my books tighter to my chest, "why did you tell me that?"

"I don't want you to get the wrong impression of me,"

"And why does that matter to you, if I get the wrong impression? I mean, I won't be here long," I ushered Regina out the classroom, pulled my lanyard over my head and jammed the key in to lock it.

"I care about you Emma,"

I rolled my eyes, "Really? Like, I've been here a week Regina and suddenly you care about me?"

Regina was taken slightly aback by my rude statement,

"Some staff tickle my fancy, like you, dear," She winked but then deadpanned as a pair of heels clicked down the hallway behind me, "others however, do not," Regina glared at the arriving teacher.

"Ah, I see you've locked the classroom, Emma," Mary Margaret's voice sung behind me. I raised my eyebrows at Regina and she rolled her eyes. For a Principal, she was sure as hell childish.

"Good day Ms Blanchard," Regina snipped and averted her gaze back to me, "remember what I told you Ms Swan, keep it in mind," Regina placed a soft hand on my shoulder and I had to double check she didn't set me alight from her touch. She stalked off down the corridor towards the staffroom.

Mary Margaret and I watched Regina turn the corner and Mary sighed loudly,

"That woman's been angry with me since I arrived. I try to be friends but she just shuts me out and runs to Kathryn,"

"Kathryn?"

"Kathryn Midas the Maths teacher. They were inseparable when Regina used to be in the Maths department, but Regina got put up to Head Mistress and they still gossip like teenagers,"

"I think that's my son Maths teacher, blonde woman right?"

"Yep," Mary Margaret unlocked the door and quickly ducked in, grabbing some files from the drawer in the desk, "okay, I'm back. Sorry. I've got some spare time; did you want to catch some lunch with me?"

"Yeah sure, I've got twenty minutes before the next class," I glanced at my watch and Mary Margaret beamed at me.

* * *

"…and then David put the Mentos into the Coke and it shot him right in the face!" Mary Margaret covered her mouth as she giggled at the memory. I smiled and pushed my leftover spaghetti around in its container.

"Hey, you okay?" Mary put a hand on mine and I gasped.

"Yeah, no, yeah I'm fine! Sorry, I'm in another world today," I twirled my fork and crammed some spaghetti ungracefully into my mouth. I smiled again and a single piece of pasta fell from my clenched teeth,

"Charming," Regina raised a single eyebrow at me as she entered the staffroom.

"Shit, Regina, sorry," I slurped the loose strand back into my mouth and wiped my lips with the back of my hand. Of course Regina was here and saw it. Mary looked down into her salad and stifled a laugh. I glared at the pixie haired woman as Regina turned her back to us and pressed a pink flyer to the staff corkboard. I took this glorious moment to check out her arse and Mary Margaret stabbed me in the hand with her fork,

"Ow! Hey, what was that for?" I pressed my sore hand to my lips and frowned at Mary. She just shrugged and flicked her eyes over to Regina,

"Completely childish you two," Regina flashed us a smile over her shoulder and stuck a few thumbtacks into the flyer.

"It's all Emma, I swear," Mary piped up.

"You know, I'm really starting to question this friendship Mary Margaret," I nudged her slightly. Regina scoffed loudly and Mary Margaret coughed to dismiss Regina's disapproval, "so, what's that?" I licked the sauce off my fork and dug around for another sizable scoop.

"School Disco," Regina sighed as she pressed the last thumbtack and stepped back to admire her work. I was surprised. Regina didn't seem like the Principal who'd hold cool things like that.

"Sweet," I chirped but Mary Margaret scrunched up her nose like there was a bad smell around, "When is it?"

"Two weeks from now. I need some staff volunteers to help out," I looked eagerly to Mary Margaret and she exhaled quietly,

"Fine,"

"Uh, Regina, Mary Margaret and I will join,"

"Excellent," Regina jotted down our names on list attached to the bottom of the flyer. Our names weren't the only ones on there, "we're going to have a good-sized team this year,"

"Who else is doing it?" Mary asked as she finished the last of her lunch. Regina eyed her suspiciously and ran her pen down the list,

"You, Emma, myself, Ruby Lucas, Astrid Nova, Kathryn Midas and David Nolan so far,"

Mary Margaret perked up considerably at the last name mentioned. Meanwhile, I was hyperventilating over the fact Regina was going to be there. _Regina_.

"Sounds like an excellent bunch. I wonder why Henry's never told me about these," I mused aloud as I followed suit and shoved the last bit of spaghetti into my mouth.

"I'm sure Mr Swan will enlighten you when you go home this afternoon. After all, I did tell Ms Lucas to announce it to her class," Regina smirked knowingly. I blushed for Henry's sake,

"Oh, okay,"

Mary Margaret's eyes flashed between Regina and I, "I don't understand, wait, why is Henry apart of this?"

Regina took a step back and leaned her hands against the stiff back of my chair; her knuckles brushing my jacket. Oh man, I just wanted to rip this damn jacket off and throw myself backwards against her. Her hands would be so soft and I wonder if she's the 'explore-the-skin-over-clothes' or 'under-clothes' kind of gal.

"Henry may or may not have a crush on Ruby," I mumbled. Mary giggled,

"Oh that's just too cute. No doubt he's not the only one. You sure have a knack for hiring attractive teachers, eh Regina?"

I glared at Mary Margaret as Regina laughed quietly, "that I do. Considering one of the finest looking ones are seated right in this chair,"

Oh no she didn't, Regina did not just say that. Mary's blue eyes widened at me as I lowered my head in embarrassment. Sweet Jesus, Regina is going to kill me. How I am even supposed to respond to that? What would a normal, rational person do in this situation? Actually wait; no normal person would be stuck in this situation because it's humanly impossible.

Regina leaned over and her breast scraped my ear; her breasts, her glorious boobs that were separated from me by just two layers of cloth. I watched her dip two fingers into the leftover sauce of my lunch and bring it up to her mouth.

No, no if she sucks on them, I am a dead woman.

Of course she sucks on them, good grief. I almost groaned out loud as I crossed my legs tightly, her tongue licking the last bit of sauce.

"Mm, quite delicious Ms Swan. I might need you to cook for me one night," She winked and left the room, leaving Mary Margaret and myself open-mouthed.

"What the actual hell just happened?" Mary fumed as I stared at my container, scrutinising the marks Regina had left in the sauce.

"Your guess is good as mine, Blanchard," I squeezed my eyes shut and the image of Regina licking the sauce off her fingers flashed up.

"Did she seriously just lick the sauce from her fingers like that? What the hell is she trying to pull?"

"I don't know man, but it was hot,"

How the hell am I teacher? I seriously need a filter on my mouth. Mary sighed and stood up angrily,

"Like I said to you a few nights ago at Parent-Teacher, each to their own," She busied herself with sorting out her papers for her next lesson, "thank you for joining me for lunch Emma, I'm sure we'll do it again sometime without that little interruption from Regina," Mary spat our boss's name out like it was poison.

"Yeah, sorry about that," I apologised and slammed the lid down on my empty spaghetti container. Mary smiled softly and left the staffroom in a flash.

* * *

Like Regina had stated, Henry had rushed home that evening and told me he was going to the school disco. He had no need to look for lifts because I would be attending too. He didn't seem too happy about that.  
Anyway, it had been three days since that little incident and Regina was no less subtle as the days wore on. She had an unbelievable knack for turning up when I was bent over or licking some kind of substance off of a piece of silverware. But then again, she had caught me red handed on multiple occasions staring at her boobs or butt, and would quickly ask if I saw something I liked. Hell yeah I saw something I liked but I was not going to admit that. I confined this juicy gossip to Ruby and Ruby only.

"Seriously man, you shouldn't worry about it" Ruby caught a stray tennis ball and threw it back to the group of students. We stood around on lunch duty, making sure the kids didn't destroy the area underneath the Science block.

"Yeah, but this is Regina. What happens if she fires me if I don't do the… you know, 'do' with her?"

Ruby snorted, "God Emma, do the 'do'? What are you, four? Nah she won't. She's super chilled about it. I think you should ride it out and see where it leads you,"

She blasted a toothy grin at a passing group of boys, who all blushed brightly.

"I love doing that," she muttered.

"Doing what?" I glanced over to the Arts teacher and eyed her suspiciously,

"Make the boys blush, it's so much fun. Total ego boost,"

I raised my eyebrows at her, "they're children Ruby. Anyway, they're probably off to the toilets now to wank…"

"Don't go there," Ruby glared at me but I just laughed, "Anyway, do you even like Regina?"

I choked a little bit. Oh God, here we go; twenty questions.

"Sort of, I guess. I mean, I'd totally bang her if that's what you're implying,"

"I'd definitely recommend a bang from her," Ruby winked and picked up a lone hat sitting on the cement.

"Wait, you've banged her?" I gasped. Regina didn't disclose that little snippet of information.

"Nah, I've heard stories though. Totally worth the game she plays with you for like two months before hand," She spun the hat on her fingertips.

"What game?" I snatched the hat from her hands and looked at the label; the hat was owned by D Crawly.

"The game she's got you in now!" Ruby stated. I almost fainted right there. So this was all a game? Like a massive super stretched out version of foreplay? "Oh come on Emma, like you haven't noticed. Mary told me about the sauce thing the other day and Regina totally checks you out like a lion to prey,"

"Oh boy," This was not happening. Regina was interested in me? "But I thought you and her…" I trailed off, shoving the hat back into Ruby's hands.

"Me and Regina," Ruby laughed, "Oh man, that was one time. We got super drunk at a staff party and kissed. Nothing too crazy darling,"

"Oh," I breathed a sigh of relief,

"Plus, everybody knows she likes blondes. Why do you think we have so many at this school?" She pinched a lock of my blonde hair from my shoulder and waggled in front of my nose, "come on Captain Obvious,"

I snorted, "Fine, okay. So Regina likes me, now what?"

The bell rung loudly and the students cleared out slowly. We followed the path down to the staffroom. We both had spare time this afternoon.

"Totally abuse it," She pushed open the staffroom door, smiled at Ms Nova who was leaving, and plopped herself down in a chair.

"Or embrace it?" I suggested as I pulled a red apple from the staff fridge.

"You're not suggesting to start a relationship are you Ms Swan?" Ruby scoffed. I winced at the words. I'm pretty sure Regina wouldn't pick me when she had other suitors lining up eagerly. I was a contract teacher; she could probably get someone with more money. I shrugged my shoulders and closed the fridge door with a swing of my hip, "if that happens, I wouldn't stop it,"

"Right, well," Ruby traced the knots of wood in the table as I sat down next to her, "maybe we should initiate something then?"

"_We_," I asked. This apple was no longer as appetizing as it was thirty seconds ago.

"Yeah why not, I mean you are a contract teacher and if this doesn't work out, you just change schools, simple," Ruby shrugged like it was the easiest plan in the world.

"And she said if I was in her good books, I might get a permanent position here," I mumbled as I rotated the apple in my hand. Ruby's eyes lit up,  
"Dude that's awesome! See? More reason to try this out,"

"But when and how would I start something?"

Ruby's eyes flicked up to the School Disco poster on the corkboard.

"At the Disco,"

"Serious? The Disco, come on Ruby!" I whined. That was stupid. The horny fifteen year olds would be trying to get with other equally horny fifteen year olds. There was no way I was going to try and get with Regina when that was happening.

"It'll be interesting. I mean, we could get her a little drunk?" She waggled her eyebrows at me, "eh, Swan? Drunken Regina is a bit fun".

"We can't get the Principal drunk at a school event," I huffed as I crossed my arms.

"What? We've all done it before," Ruby admitted, "How else do you think we survive the night?"

"Oh my God," I rolled my eyes. She rested reassuring hands on my knees,  
"Just a little bit of wine, just to loosen the inhibitions," she winked. I sighed dejectedly and Ruby slapped me on the knee, "come on Swan, it'll be fun. You, me and old Mills, but minus the fact that Mills knows,"

There was no way I was getting out of this alive. Ruby's eyes burned into mine and all I could do was accept under that ferocious glare.

"About time this school hired another party animal," she stood up and ruffled my hair. I swatted away her hand and she laughed.

"I'm not a party animal,"

"Of course you're not Swan,"

* * *

a/n: *f_ist pump_* fuck yeah who's keen for a slightly drunk very, very slutty Regina Mills later on in the story? whoop whoop.


	5. Chapter 5

a/n: caution, don't let Regina Mills near bananas.  
that is all.

* * *

I leaned against the hood of my car as the students filed out at the end of the day. In the sea of white shirts, purple and golden ties, Mary Margaret appeared.

"Emma!" She called as she ran towards me, holding a deep tray thing against her hip filled with marking. I had to admit, the idea was ingenious. Clearly she had stolen one from the school because it was covered in cuts and splashes of paint.

"I thought you'd left!" She caught her breath as she rested the box against the blue Getz I had a nasty habit of parking next too.

"Nah, I'm waiting for Henry. I finished early today and hung out with Ruby,"

Mary Margaret rooted around in her small woven handbag and pulled out a set of keys. She beeped open the Getz and yanked open the boot.

"Oh so this is you?" I smiled as I was hit with the strong smell of nature. She pushed the box right to the back and sat down on the lip of the boot, "smells like you've got a small forest growing in there,"

She smirked as she leaned back and pulled off three air fresheners from the handle of the back seat. Mary splayed them out like a hand of cards, "Forest, extra strength forest and apple," she pressed her nose to them and smiled sheepishly, "I kind of like the woodlands,"

"Never would have guessed, little Ms Runner of the Environment Club,"

"Hey the population of squirrels in this area is seriously declining, I can't help if I want to love them all," she pouted as she hung the air fresheners back up.

"See you later Ms Blanchard! See you later Ms Swan!" A girl called as she skipped past. We both raised our hand to her.

"See you Emily!" Mary yelled out, flattening down her flyaway fringe.

"Evening ladies," David Nolan appeared suddenly by my car, scaring the life out of me.

"Warn me next time Nolan, holy hell," I pressed my hand to my chest and took a deep breath while Mary blushed.

"Hey darling," David leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to Mary's cheek; Mary's blush deepened, "not here David, there are children…" She smirked. I mockingly gagged,

"You two are too cute; it's sickening, stop,"

"Do I detect a hint of jealously Ms Swan?" David put his stuff into the boot of Mary's car,

"We all know that Regina's trying to get with little Swan here," Mary poked me in the stomach as I crossed my arms and glared jokingly at David.

"Geez Mary Margaret, keep your voice down," I leaned closer to Mary and David as Leroy stumbled past,

"We all know it girlie," Leroy winked at us as he exited the gate towards a grey car parked on the other side of the road.

"Good God," I rolled my eyes as Mary Margaret and David laughed. Leroy waved at us as he hopped into his car and drove off.

"Mum!" Henry yelled out and I pulled him into a hug.

"Hey kid, did you have a good day?" I kissed him on the head and took his bag from him, dumping it into the back seat.

"Meh, you know. Classic Wednesday," He shrugged and hopped into the passenger seat. I looked over to Mary and she wiggled her mobile phone in the air, pointing at it. I got the hint and started the car, backing out of the car park. My breath hitched into my throat when Regina came out wearing a black trench coat and holding a grey briefcase. She waved to me and I waved back as we edged out onto the main road.

* * *

I'm pretty sure drinking alcohol while I marked was not on the criteria of being a teacher. Work was spread across the coffee table because Henry had taken over the dinner table. We both worked in silence, Henry bobbed along to a tune that played through his earphones. My beer was sort of warm but none the less, it did its job. My paper weight buzzed as an incoming text message hit it. I picked up my phone and smiled as Mary Margaret sent me a message.

'_Please tell me you are marking our history assignments_'

'_Damn straight, I'm playing a drinking game with myself_' I threw the phone back down and circled a mistake in red pen. I took another sip. I was definitely going to be drunk by the end of the night at this rate. My phone buzzed almost instantly.

'_Oh, what type of drinking game?_' she added a winking face at the end.

'_Every time I spot a mistake, I drink_' I texted and rested it on my thigh.

'_Count me in. Good gracious, I'm going to be so drunk and probably hung over tomorrow. These essays are atrocious_'

I laughed as Mary sent a picture through of her hugging a bottle of vodka.

'_I'm only using beer and wine but whatever floats your boat_'

'_Pussy_'

Mary Margaret was almost never like this, and it was wonderful. I imagined if Regina would do something like this and groaned at as fake Regina straddled my lap, drinking wine straight from the bottle.

'_Let's see how much fun you are tomorrow morning then Ms Blanchard_'

'_Bring it Swan_'

I didn't reply because I knew she'd be hitting the vodka by now. I was not up for some drunk texts from her so I switched off my phone and looked over the papers.

* * *

I definitely should have drunk water before I went to bed last night. Holy shit, was the roof really spinning that fast? I moaned as a wave of nausea hit me. All I did was mark some shitty essays and now I had to pay for it. I bolted for the toilet and empty the contents of my stomach into it. I felt instantly better and remembered how well my body usually dealt with hangovers. It was a blessing in my youth. I flushed the toilet and turned on the shower to full bore. Rifling through my small medicine cabinet, I popped three Panadols into my mouth and stepped into the hot shower.

Henry knocked loudly on the bathroom door, "Ma!"

"What?" I squirted some conditioner into my hair and rubbed it through,

"I'm going to walk to school today,"

"Yeah okay,"

"So I'm going to go. See you at school,"

Shit what was the time? I poked my head through the shower curtain and riffled through my clothes for my watch; 7:47am. Oh shit. Oh shit, shit. I had class in just over forty minutes, and here I was stuck in my shower with a mild hangover. Great start to the day.

I shut off the water and stepped out. I quickly dried myself down and wrapped my soaking hair up in a green fluffy towel. What was even today? Oh thank God, it was Thursday, sport day. Pulling on some black shorts with white trimmings, I stumbled around searching for my bright pink Nikes and a pair of clean socks. My stupid work-issued polo would have to do for today; a dark purple shirt with the school logo and name etched in gold just over my left boob. Not many teachers wore it but I'm sure they'll realise my situation when I arrive with wet hair.

* * *

I quickly chowed down a muesli bar as the kettle pinged loudly. Pouring some instant coffee into my portable cup, I threw several bananas into my handbag and the pot of peanut butter. Lunch was sorted. Regina was going to have my head for this.

"Shit," I checked the time and slammed the front door closed.

I had made it to school by the skin of my teeth. The bell rang as I ran from my car to the staffroom, checking the 'Boyd/Swan' box for any messages or substitute classes. Great, minimal spare time and a substitute class today for Mr Booth's History, which was now. I downed the rest of my lukewarm coffee and headed over to the English block where I clearly heard a loud group of kids screaming and chattering. Bloody hell, it was going to be a long day. I took the stairs two steps at a time,

"Calm down dears, I'm sure your sub will be here any minute,"

And to top it all off, Regina has taken over my class and has noticed I am late, awesome. I cleared my throat,

"Sorry about that class, I am here and ready to roll. Thank you Ms Mills,"

Regina flinched under my touch and her eyes lingered on my bare tanned legs.

"Well, well, well, isn't it the darling Ms Swan?" She sneered as she licked her lips, "taking August's class are we?"

I stared at the name on the class roll, "yeah apparently,"

Her eyes wandered once more over my body, "hmm, I shall come in and check up on you near the end of class got it dear?"

"Aye, aye Captain," I saluted the woman as a few students giggled as they filed into the classroom noisily. Regina rolled her eyes and leaned forward, her lips practically brushing my earlobe. I was so totally, definitely, weak at the knees.

"Hmm, I should come visit you more often on a Thursday if you're going to be wearing such short…shorts,"

And I was also pretty sure that her hand just lightly touched the inside of my thigh.

"Have a good lesson Ms Swan, and make sure you write some good notes for Mr Booth," Regina quickly pulled away and stepped down the stairs. My death was surely coming soon. I could just feel it.

* * *

The note said to chuck on this Horrible Histories DVD about the ancient Romans and hand out a sheet to answer questions about the film. As if the kids are actually going to do it. I really didn't care to be completely honest. The lights were dimmed and I tapped away on my phone, checking my Facebook. My stomach growled and I remembered I had banana and peanut butter in my bag. Hell yeah. Checking the clock, I only had twenty minutes left and the likelihood of Regina turning up early was minimal considering she was meant to be super busy today. Half the kids were engrossed in the film and the others were chatting quietly or had their heads resting on the desks. I'm sure they wouldn't mind if I just popped my feet up and munched on this banana. I mean, it wasn't like we were doing anything extremely important. If they really cared they'd do the work, so like, whatever.

I peeled the skin off the banana and dumped it into the little bin under August's desk; I couldn't help but giggle at the little statue of Pinocchio that sat on the corner. I spun off the top of the peanut butter and dipped my banana into it; heaven in a snack. A few students stared at me as I tentatively placed almost half the banana into my mouth,

"Do you really think that is the smartest thing to do with a classroom of horny students, Ms Swan?"

I removed the banana and the nearest bunch of male students sniggered.

Regina raised an eyebrow at me as she leaned calmly against the open doorframe,

"Regina!" This woman seriously had a knack with running into me at extraordinarily inappropriate times. She also motioned her chin to my feet which were crossed and perched on top of the desk. I quickly retracted them and banged my knee loudly on the corner of the desk.

"Holy…" I gasped as I clutched my knee in pain. The class suddenly looked at me and noticed Regina standing at the door. The entire mood of the room changed abruptly.

"Ms Swan, a word?"  
The class broke out in whisper and I glared at all of them. Still clutching the banana, I ducked outside the classroom where Regina stood dressed in a black pressed pant suit. I have titled this particular outfit the power pant suit because it made me drool and pretty much made me do whatever Regina threw my way.

"I swear Ms Mills, that was just bad timing," I pleaded. She simply smirked as she clasped her hands in front of her stomach, "I'm not here to chastise you on your bad teaching habits, but to inform you that you will be working with me on the night of the school disco,"

"Oh, okay," I frowned at the browning banana in my hand,

"You do not sound delighted. I thought that's what you wanted?"

"Yes it is but..." Regina pulled me out of the prying view of my students, to around the corner.

"Yes, but _what_ dear," She breathed heavily, pressing her chest against mine. Oh my god. Was this actually happening? Were her nipples poking into my chest? Holy moly, she's so hot. Oh my god. Her eyes fell to my lips and I licked them instinctively. Regina groaned softly and her eyelids drooped slightly. It was so, so hot. I wasn't even touching her seductively and she was already moaning. Who knew what I could do to her with her shirt at my feet and my mouth on her boobs. No.

"My son…H-henry will be there and," but Regina just smiled evilly. She ran a finger down my cheek and hooked it round my chin, pulling it up to her height,

"You don't want Henry to see? Hmm, I can sort that out. We're on the back door anyway," She winked. Oh good God. If I wasn't so damn awkward around attractive women and we weren't in a public area, I probably would have ravished her by now. Regina winked again and quickly drew herself off of me as two girls stepped around the corner, chatting.

"Hey Ms Swan," the girls waved as Regina deadpanned.

"Seriously, they know who you are but not me?" She glowered as the girls disappeared into another classroom.

"They know my son, calm down," But Regina eyed the banana in my hands,

"Are you still going to eat that?"

"No why?" Regina stole the fruit from my grasp and her eyes darkened as she brought the yellow fruit to her supple lips. Here we go; another sexual act that wasn't really meant to be intentionally sexy but clearly was. Oh maybe the fact I have been working with a bunch of horny teenage boys for two weeks was suddenly making every situation with Regina dirty. She ran her tongue over the banana, flicking the tip of it seductively before placing over half the fruit down her throat. Regina bit down and winked as she chewed; the skin around her eyes crinkled as they flashed happily. Did Regina just deep throat a banana? What.

"As delightful as that little show was, I don't actually like…dick," I grimaced as Regina swallowed loudly. She shrugged,

"Oh I am fully aware of your situation Ms Swan. I was simply just enjoying the fruit that you were about to throw away,"

Regina threw the rest of the banana out and patted me on the cheek as I almost passed out from her intensely sexual remark.

"Good day Emma," 

* * *

a/n: nice little reminder that I am leaving tomorrow for a week away down in the Channel Islands and I don't know if I'll have wifi, so either way..


	6. Chapter 6

a/n: so I'm currently stranded in Guernsey so I'm going to update while I wait. This was one of my favourite chapters to write, to be honest. so fun mwahahaha

* * *

"She bloody deep throated a frigging banana in front of me Ruby, what was I supposed to do?" I whispered angrily to the brunette Art teacher as she picked through her chicken and bacon salad. The staffroom was fairly packed and I did not want this conversation getting around. I had saved a seat next to me for Mary Margaret for when she came back from lunch duty. Ruby just shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know man, but she totally wants you,"

"Really," I replied sarcastically as I unwrapped my store bought ham and salad sandwich, "because I thought, you know, her sucking a banana off and touching me on the thigh was just friendly things to do,"

"Hey, friends with benefits, you never know,"

"And," I took a bite from the sandwich and chewed it, "her and I are working together for the Disco,"

"Shit man, you are screwed," Ruby giggled as she wrestled a large piece of lettuce in between her teeth. The staffroom door banged open and a less than pleasant looking Mary Margaret stumbled in. I patted the spot beside me and she fell into a heap, her head resting on the large table.

"You okay, buddy?" Ruby snickered as Mary groaned. The pixie haired English and History teacher had definitely hit the vodka hard last night.

"I am never doing that again Emma," I slipped her two Panadols and my water bottle. She took them gratefully and popped her lips as she finished drinking, "I'm pretty sure Jacob Whitlock's essay was where this game totally screwed me over," Mary closed her eyes as the staffroom door opened again; this time, Regina waltzed through.

"Op, banana bitch is back," Ruby placed her empty salad container onto the table and winked at me as Regina came over.

"Ah Emma, I was hoping I would find you here. Uh," she glanced over to Mary who had now put her hands over her eyes and was puffing out her cheeks, "Ms Blanchard is everything okay?"

"Ask Emma," she groaned.

"Care to elaborate dear?" Regina asked coolly,

"Drinking game," I smiled up at the Principal and she frowned,

"On a school night...? _Really_ Ms Blanchard,"

"Emma got me into it. Tell her what you do,"

Ruby was also quite intrigued.

"For every mistake you circle on a final draft, you take a sip. Or in Mary Margaret's case, a shot,"

"Genius," Ruby stared at me in awe,

"Stupid," Regina rolled her eyes at the three of us.

"And Jacob Whitlock is probably the most incompetent student Emma and I teach," Mary cracked open an eye to stare at Regina, "and I happen to get his essay,"

"You could've taken A to M, but you chose N to Z," I handed Mary my water bottle again and she drank heavily,

"Stupid Whitlock,"

"I think I actually love you Emma," Ruby laughed as she patted me sympathetically on the shoulder.

* * *

"Block him Kate, go around him. Stephen, take Louis's position. Shoot damn it, shoot!" I threw my fist into the air as the little ginger boy in a blue bib reached up and shot the netball in a perfect arch through the hoop.

"Blue is on four, Yellow is on three. Come on guys we've got ten minutes left until the end of the day. Give it your all,"

A warm breeze caressed the inside on my legs as I stood on the edge of the red netball courts. The sun was super harsh as I wiped a trickle of sweat from my temple and blew the whistle that hung on my lanyard.

The class repositioned themselves on the court and I blew the whistle again. Yellow sunk two balls and a girl from the Red team tripped Yellow's shooter.  
"Miss, Jennifer tripped me!" the girl tumbled onto the asphalt, holding her bleeding knee.

"Jennifer! Go sit under the tree, I will deal with you soon! Guys, start packing up". Jennifer grumbled as she marched off to the large tree that shaded half of the courts.

"She did a bit of number on you, didn't she?" I grabbed a nearby water bottle and squeezed cold water onto the wound, washing away the oozing blood. It wasn't too deep but she still needed to go to sick bay.

"Louis! Can you take…sorry, what's your name?"

"Julia," she smiled at me as I helped her to her feet,

"Louis can you take Julia to the sick bay please," I grabbed Julia's palm and scribbled a leave pass into her skin. She giggled when she realised my complete and utter laziness to grab an actual piece of paper.

Louis grinned and took the injured girl away. Dismissing the class three minutes before they were actually supposed to go, got me a few high fives and yelps of glee.

"Now Jennifer," I squatted down to the red cheeked blonde girl, "why'd you trip Julia?"

"I didn't mean to, she just got, like, in the way," she huffed as she watched Louis place a protective arm around the hobbling Julia. I raised her eyebrows at her,

"Or maybe because you're jealous of her?"

Jennifer scowled at me, "None of your business,"

I bowed my head, "You're right. I'm sorry. Just promise me you won't go tripping people again or I will have to give you a detention,"

"Yeah sure Miss," she hopped up and ripped off her bib and chucked it in the mismatched pile beside us, "See you later Miss,"

I sighed and hung my head. Jennifer mumbled another round of apologises and my head snapped up. Bloody Hell, it was Regina.

"Come to punish me for not giving that girl a detention," I sneered as I picked the white ball up and held in against my hip, "Ms Mills,"

"Hardly," she raised her chin up at me as I bounced the ball against the cement, "I came to see how you're going,"

I stared up into the bright blue sky and exhaled, "three times in one day Regina; you don't seem to be giving all the other new staff this much attention,"

She bowed her head in acknowledgement, "but the new staff, they aren't you, are they Ms Swan?"

"Bloody hope not," I grumbled as I started splitting the bibs up into colour coded piles. I definitely could feel a headache coming on and I really did not want to deal with Regina right now. But there she stood, in her damn pants suit, killer heels with her wrists crossed at her stomach. The wind blew again and Regina's perfume hit my nose like a tidal wave of ecstasy. Was she literally wearing lesbian hormones or something?

"You okay Ms Swan?"

"Yep," I popped my lips on the 'P' and continued to sort of the bibs. I was pretty sure Regina was staring at my tits where my loose polo shirt fell away from my chest.

"Would you like to play with me, Ms Swan?"

I almost broke my neck at the speed I looked up at her. Her stiletto rested on the volley ball as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Wouldn't want to ruin your heels Ms Mills," I smirked. Okay, maybe I could withstand the hot woman for a little while longer because how was I supposed to say no when she looked at me like that?

Regina flicked off her heels and stood barefoot on the asphalt, flexing her toes.

"Or…or your outfit," I licked my lips but Regina just grinned as she peeled off her black jacket and flung it over a low branch of the massive tree.

"Are you just finding excuses not to verse me Emma?" Regina untucked her short sleeved white shirt from her trousers and aired it out a little. I caught a glimpse of a toned stomach and almost moaned. How the hell was this woman even interested in me? How, look at her, she's perfection. She tucked her hair behind her ears and waited for me.

"Your move dear,"

I dampened my lips and gave her a quick once over with my eyes. She didn't even blush under my gaze, hell, I think she was smug.

"Fine,"

"You block, I shoot, deal?"

"Hardly; I was the best shooter in school," Regina took no notice to my whine and picked up the ball, holding it gingerly between her fingertips.

"Well, unfortunately for you, I rule this school and therefore, you do what I say," Her eyes sparkled mischievously. Two can play this game you crazy hot woman.

"Oh, is that so? And what would happen if I was to disobey your direct orders?"

The hot Principal padded towards me, spinning the ball in her hands, her hips swaying.

"Like any school teacher, I'd punish them. Severely,"

"Aw, kinky Ms Mills," I winked at her and she was taken aback by my sudden burst of confidence. But her eyes narrowed dangerously at me,

"You're playing a dangerous game, Ms Swan. I'll have you know I always win,"

"I do not doubt that one bit," I pried the ball from Regina's hands. She did not let up easily.

"Then why do you still refuse me?"

Clearly this conversation had completely gone out of context. Oh man, this was a dangerous game.

"You like the chase Regina, what kind of terrible person would I be if I just gave in?" I shrugged my shoulders as she snarled. My heart was thumping away loudly and I was quite impressed it hadn't shattered my ribcage. She chewed her lip as she mulled over her words.

"You are infuriating Ms Swan,"

"And you love it," I leaned in, wiggling my eyebrows at her. I shoved the ball hard against Regina's tense stomach, "your move…Mills,"

* * *

In the twenty or so minutes that we played, the school had completely emptied, leaving us alone on the dusty netball courts. If Henry hadn't insisted that he would walk home with his best friend Tom, I would have been out of here, but I couldn't. Not when a pink cheeked Regina Mills breathed erratically as she bounced a ball against the cement, the sound echoing out across the silence grounds.

"Show us your moves Mills," I squatted down, watching the ball rise and fall from Regina's hands. She was quick, that was for sure. Didn't help she was actually pretty small without her towering heels. She had successfully shot five hoops and one was a definitely fluke because I was too distracted by the strip of toned stomach that showed itself every time she raised her arms up.

Regina grinned and straightened,  
"Don't sass me Swan, I own your arse,"

"You'd like that wouldn't you?" I quipped as she stepped forward, her wrist ready to flick the ball effortlessly into the hoop. I jumped as she did; my hands colliding unexpectedly with the ball. Regina squeaked and reached out to steady herself before she landed, but her soft hand landed at the hem of my purple polo. Her nails caught the edge and suddenly her fingers were gliding over my stomach. I had to fight every single fibre in my body not too moan.

I stumbled backwards, my spine connecting hard with the metal pole of the hoop. Regina fell onto my chest and her hands landed on my bare hips where my shirt had rolled up from her grabbing at it mid-air. The ball rolled around the rim of the hoop as we both stared up at it. Regina still hadn't removed her hands and I was not complaining. The ball teetered for a second, and then fell through.

"She shoots…" Regina smirked as the ball bounced off my head and rolled away. It was definitely time to wipe that smug look off the Principal's face. I wrapped my arm around her waist, spun her around and slammed her up against pole; her hands in one of my hands pinned up above our heads.

Regina gasped as my lips brushed the skin of her exposed neck,

"She scores," I pressed a kiss to her collarbone and ran my tongue up her throat, flicking her earlobe with the tip of my tongue. She moaned as she pulled me closer.

"Time out, Ms Mills," I wriggled free from her possessive grasp and I had never seen such a death stare than the one I was receiving from Regina Mills at that moment.

"No, no, you…" she lunged forwards, grabbing my cheeks firmly with her palms. She crushed her lips onto mine, but I peeled her off me.

"You don't get to decide when or whether or not we get to kiss, that's my role," Regina fumed, her black hair fluttered in the wind, "I rule this school,"

"Looks like you're about to be brought down a peg there Mills," I wiped the red lipstick from my mouth mockingly and spat onto the ground. She took a menacing step forward, her chest hard against mine.  
"I will have you," she moaned, "if it's the last thing I do,"

"Good. I like a bit of a challenge,"

Regina raised an eyebrow, "so optimistic Emma. By the time your contract here is done, I will have you begging me to be in between your legs,"

"Two can play this game, Regina,"

"But I always…_win_," she beared her teeth at me, her eyes ablaze with lust.

* * *

a/n: I'm actually annoyed at how possessively hot I have made Regina. ugh.


	7. Chapter 7

a/n: pre-disco chapter ;) next chapter is gunna fab-youuu-lus ;) ;) (I'm still in Alderney so kinda apologising for not updating)

Happy reading!

Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

please review! constructive critism appreciated

* * *

"Holy fucking shit," Ruby breathed,

"Ruby, Jesus, we are in a school,"

"Oh come on, Regina Mills snogged you on the basketball courts, I think some intense swearing is allowed," I rolled my eyes at her and stretched my leg out in front of me, touching the tips of my Nikes.

"It was the netball courts and fine, you have a point," I changed legs as Ruby pulled her arm across her chest as she stretched.

"It's like 7a.m; no kids are even in the school. Which reminds me, why the hell did I agree to this?"

"Because we need to get healthy Ruby,"

"Or you were just super excited to tell me about Regina so you hauled my arse up with you to the school at this hour,"

"Maybe," I tugged my shorts up higher and glanced out to the dew covered running track, "alright, ready to party?"

"Tonight I am, but not right now," Ruby stifled a yawn as I jogged out to the starting line.

* * *

"Do you think Regina will kill us for using this track? Especially in the morning,"

"Nah, we'll be fine,"

We kept our pace up as we rounded the last corner. Both our faces were bright red and breathing had never been this hard before.

"No, you'll be fine; I'll probably have my arse handed to me,"

I couldn't help but let out a breathy laugh; my chest ached. We slowed down considerably and rested our hands on our knees as we crossed the finish line.

"Trust me Lucas; Regina wants nothing more than to beat me to a pulp, so I will take the full force of it. Like you said; I'm a contract teacher, what's the worst she could do?"

Ruby glared at the staff car park over my shoulder and I could only guess that a certain shiny Mercedes had graced the place with its presence.

"Hmm, you do have a point," I twisted my head and zeroed in on the trench-wearing goddess that had her back to us.

"Emma, we're a kilometre away…seriously, are you really checking her arse from _this_ distance?"

Regina turned and I noticed she held a phone to her, "maybe,"  
"Man," Ruby shook her head as she flexed her thighs, "we need to get you laid,"

"Preferably with Regina," I smirked as Ruby's eyebrows shot up into her hairline. We slowly made our way towards the car park – towards Regina, I might add – as Ruby laughed,

"Suddenly get a change of heart aye Swan?"

"Oh no, Regina told me she, and I quote, will have me begging for her head between my legs by the time my contract was over," I made air-quotes with my fingers as we headed up the steps to the slightly elevated car park. We tiptoed past an oblivious Regina and made our way towards Ruby's bright red convertible,

"Put the woman out of her misery man, just she shove her up against a wall and stick your hand up her shirt," Ruby pleaded as she popped the boot.

The brunette Art teacher had offered me and Henry a lift to school today and I had graciously accepted, knowing full well I didn't have enough petrol in the car for the short trip here. But Henry had refused and stuck his head back into his pillows when I woke him at some God-awful time this morning. I'm sure he's regretting it now. She chucked me my gym bag and I slung it over my shoulder.

"I suggest you heed the woman's advice Ms Swan," I didn't even need to turn around to know whose voice that was. I instinctively rolled my eyes at Ruby's shocked facial expression.

"Pretty sure that's sexual harassment Regina,"  
"It's not if I'm so willingly okay to accept it and you're willing to perform it," she snipped. I spun around to face her,

"And what makes you think…holy shit,"

Thank God I was already bright faced and sort of sweaty because I was not mentally prepared at all for the delightfully daring outfit that the Principal of Story Brooke College was wearing. Red; that's all I got, a sea of red and olive skin and perky boobs.

"See something you like Ms Swan?"

"Chi-yeah," Ruby mumbled from behind, "I mean, uh, nice dress Regina,"

Regina smirked at Ruby as I left my mouth wide open at the very tight dress that left a lot to my active imagination. Every muscle in my body screamed for me to go and press that woman up against her damn shiny car and grinded her so hard into it that it'd leave a dint. But I shrugged and wiped my face on my towel,

"I'm just shocked that a Principal would wear such a provocative dress considering we work with hormonal prepubescent boys," I shot her a dazzling smile, "I believe sexiness is smartness. No need to bare your legs and share your tits with the world,"

Ruby's mouth fell open with a small pop as Regina pursed her cherry red lips.

"Well aren't I glad I came prepared," She winked and yanked open the door to the back seat of her car. At first, I just thought the black leather bound seats were bare but Regina leaned in, arse to me, and hooked out a jacket and a pair of black stockings.

"Oh look what we have here," She folded the seamed stockings on top of her car and slid the jacket over her shoulders, doing up two buttons on the front and pulling away her hair. Her hand slipped into the breast pocket and pulled out her infamous black glasses. No, oh no. She's going for hot teacher look. Good grief, I am definitely going to need a cold shower straight after this little fiasco.

Regina pouted at me as I roamed my eyes over her new accessories. She grabbed the stockings, her briefcase, and looked at me over her glasses, "I'm going to put these on in my office; you are more than welcome to join me Ms Swan,"

"Sorry, I'm going to hit the showers with Ruby; you know, I'll get her to work the kinks out of my tired muscles in the hot steam from this morning's run,"

Regina gulped audibly, "of course," she glanced at Ruby, who had paled considerably, "I'm sure her inner thighs will need the most massaging Ms Lucas, at least… that's where I would start. Good day," Regina lifted her nose up into the air and glided towards the office.

"You just signed your death warrant girl," Ruby groaned.

"Please put that on my gravestone; death by Regina Mills," I nudged her in the side as we headed towards the staff bathrooms, "come on, you have to admit that was fun,"

"It wasn't fun, it was fucking hot; I don't know what you're on about,"

* * *

Today had gone extraordinarily quick much to my enjoyment. I saw Regina only briefly again as the classes changed and almost every set of male eyes, including a couple female ones, were on her as she stalked down the main hallway. She had stopped in front of me and my class who were lining up, and tugged on my lanyard, eyeing off my lips like they were bars of chocolate. But I popped that balloon of social awkwardness by readjusting her crooked name tag, taking extra care to brush my knuckles hard against her breasts.

* * *

Tonight was going to be interesting. Or maybe interesting was the wrong word when it came to a School Disco. I was certain that there were going to be horrible catfights between the girl students and possible snog attempts from the boy students, just what I needed; hormones running high while I'm trying to keep the down low with Regina.

My original statement with Regina still stood; smartness was sexiness and I wonder what she'd be wearing tonight. Even though this was clearly a student event, I couldn't help but feel ashamed at the giddiness that took over my lower stomach.

"Swan, you ready to go?" There was a yell from the front door and I heard Henry race down through the kitchen,

"Hey Ms Blanchard," Henry called and the front door slammed shut.

"In here Mary Margaret," A few seconds later, Mary poked her head through my bedroom door,  
"Hey, darling,"

"Hey Mary," I glanced over to Mary Margaret, "whoa, rockabilly queen right here,"

She blushed as she ran her hands down the front of her red polka dot dress, "thanks Emma,"

"Snazzy earrings too," Two fat strawberries hung from each of her earlobes. I definitely did not look as fashionable at Mary Margaret; all I wore was a black and white striped dress, tights and my trusty black flats with my hair up in a ponytail. Might as well glam it up a bit; I burrowed through my small box of jewellery and slipped on some silver bangles and a ring.

"All good to go," I smiled to her as I collected my purse and keys into a small handbag.

"Henry?" Ms Blanchard leaned against the kitchen counter as something loud fell in the bathroom.

"Shit," I dumped my stuff onto the counter beside the bewildered English teacher and ran into Henry's bathroom, "Kid, are you alright?"

I grabbed the cream coloured door frame and swung myself into the tiled room. Henry sat on the floor, his foot resting on a now broken toilet lid,

"…the hell?"

"I, uh, was tying up my shoe and slipped on a water puddle and yeah,"

"I almost had a heart attack," I reached out and lifted him up to his feet, "well, well sonny, aren't you looking dapper this evening?"

Henry blushed under my securitizing glare and as I went to ruffle his hair, he fended me off,

"Mum, no it's got gel in it. Stop,"

"Alright kid, let's go. Ms Blanchard waiting in the kitchen to take us,"

"Why aren't you driving?"

I was not going to admit to my fourteen year old son that I was planning on getting a little bit intoxicated with a certain short haired brunette Principal so I simply cleared my throat and raised my eyebrows at Mary Margaret,

"I don't have enough fuel in my tank for the trip to school,"

Mary flashed a smile and grabbed my things for me as we exited the house.

"Oh, couldn't you just fill it up on the way?"

Mary beeped the blue Getz open and hauled the door open,

"Whoa Miss, it's like a…" Ms Blanchard threw a glare over her shoulder,

"A forest, I've been told,"

"Yeah, something like that," Henry lowered his head and fell into the back seat, giggling as Mary Margaret rolled her eyes at me.

"He's your son through and through, isn't he?"

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Henry piped up as Mary Margaret pulled out of the kerb and whizzed down the main road.

I peeped at Henry through the space between the headrest and passenger chair, "it means that I'm an excellent human being and Ms Blanchard couldn't help but notice that you know, you're kind of alright," I smirked. Mary slapped my thigh as we went through a roundabout, almost hitting a Mercedes.

"Shit Emma!" Mary squeaked as she stamped on the brakes. I was thrown forward and the seat belt dug into my chest,

"Mary, what the hell," I gasped as the Mercedes beeped its horn and drove into the outer lane of the massive roundabout.

"Regina…"

I looked up and of course it was Regina's stupid shiny Mercedes.

"Man, Ms Mills has a sweet ride," Henry pressed his face against the window pane and stared as Regina smoothly manoeuvred her vehicle. I kept my vision trained on the seductive Principal. Her eyes narrowed as she noticed Mary Margaret and Henry, but winked when her brown orbs drifted to me.

"Mum, was she winking at me or you or Ms Blanchard?"

"Uh, probably me,"

Henry peeled his face off the window and we watched Regina disappear down the road as Mary Margaret waved sheepishly at the annoyed drivers around us,

"Why would she be winking at you?"

"Hmm, yes Emma, please tell us so," a smile tugged at the corner of Mary's mouth as we pulled into the school grounds. Mary Margaret didn't bother to park in the car park but instead, drove through the empty school grounds to the floodlit hall.

"I have a bet with Ms Mills and she was just gently reminding me that it still stands," I gulped, hoping that Henry would just drop it. He muttered a soft 'oh' and Mary didn't take her bright blue eyes off me,  
"That's it?" she whispered as she pulled the keys of the ignition. Henry had almost fallen face first onto the grass at the speed he exited the vehicle.

"So the sauce, banana, jogging thing and stupid glasses she's been wearing lately, is all about a bet?"

I definitely needed to remind Ruby to keep her big gob shut.

"To a degree,"

I slammed the door shut and Mary clicked her key at it; the rear lights flashed. Her eyebrows furrowed as she studied my face,

"I'm not going to ask you to elaborate because I've seen how you look at her and I really don't want to know. But I swear, some days I don't get you, Emma," she smiled softly and punched me in the arm.


	8. Chapter 8

a/n: omg okay here it is; le disco scene. Time to whip out the ol' hose because SMUT IS AH-HAPPEN. Oh and you're all right; what kind of terrible human being would I be if I didn't let the lovely Regina win this dangerous game? ;) so alas, smut at a school social event (literally who let's me write this shit; sex at a school function? jesus) WARNING SHITTINGLY WRITTEN **SMUT **and TIPSY, LIGHTWEIGHT REGINA and EXOTIC DANCER IN DISGUISE EMMA  
oh, enjoy ;) pah-lease review...  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

This Disco had Regina written all over it; from the thumping music to the black balloons covering the roof with the odd purple and gold one. A canteen had been set up at the back, fully stocked with a variety of tooth-decay, manned by a cheery looking Astrid and Leroy. Several disco balls were whirring soundlessly from the roof, flashing streams of coloured light over the small clusters of chairs and tables. God knows it brought nostalgia for the staff and upturned noses in disgust from the students. A few other staff members had clearly been wrangled in to do this as they hang around the tables, drinking soda from plastic cups.

"There's David! I, uh, I'm going to go, alright?" Mary beamed as I nodded. Henry and I were left at the door.

"Emma!" A slim hand waved up in the air and I prayed that it was Ruby. I squinted as Henry tugged at my sleeve,

"Mum, its Ms Lucas," He yanked me through the throng of people towards the grinning brunette.

"Hey there Henry, I told you I'd be here," she winked at my son and I felt Henry's grip tighten on my shirt,

"Hey Ms Lucas, you look nice tonight," he mumbled. If I hadn't been intently listening for the familiar seductive voice of Ms Mills, I would have missed it. I nudged him in the shoulder slightly,

"Mr suave now kid?"

Ruby giggled and sighed, "thank you Henry, now I'm sure I spotted Tom just over there darling. You don't want to hang around your mother and I while talk about boring teacher stuff, do you?"

Henry looked Ruby up and down again and disappeared. Ruby grabbed my wrist and pulled me back out to the front door out of the music,

"You know my kid likes you right?" I raised my eyebrows at Ruby as she removed a metal water bottle from her handbag.

"Yeah totally, I've got tons of kids hitting on me,"

"He's my son," I growled as Ruby took a heavy swig from the bottle. She screwed her face up and exhaled loudly; I smelt alcohol.

"I'll let him down easy like the rest, don't worry; no favouritism," she handed me the bottle and I peered at the suspicious liquid gushing around in it,

"Homemade Sangria," she winked. I poured a huge mouthful and almost choked. Holy shit, it was strong.

"Sangria, are you sure?"

Ruby shrugged as she took the bottle from my numb fingertips, "by Sangria, I mean a combination of like, four different wines,"

"That shit's toxic," I wiped my mouth as Ruby took another sip, her green eyes sparkling,

"That shit's good," she burped a little, "now, Regina?"

"I don't really have anything planned," I chewed on my lip as Ruby gaped at me,

"Dude, we spoke about this. Get her drunk and throw her up against the wall. Done,"

"I don't have any alcohol,"

"I came prepared," she pulled a silver hip flask from her bag and shook it, "now; I figured you are a whisky kind of girl," Ruby shook the flask and handed it to me as it gurgled, "use it well; this shit is expensive and strong and please, just please, bang the crap out of our boss,"

"Ruby, I love you," I jammed the bottle into my bag and pulled her into a tight hug,

"Hate to break this intimate moment dears, but Emma, I require your assistance,"

Regina had changed into her classic navy pants suit which didn't surprise me the slightest. The way rumours flew around this school, I'm sure Regina knew she had me on my knees when she wore that damn fine tailored suit. She stood with a strong stance; her legs apart and arms crossed. Of course she was wearing a kick ass pair of black heels.

"Why am I not surprised that you stink of alcohol Ms Lucas?" Regina eyed the bottle that dangled from Ruby's fingers.

"Come off it Regina, don't forget you and I used to drink at that back door when we did these things together,"

Regina's nostrils flared, "I suppose one drink wouldn't hurt. May I?" Before Ruby could answer, the hot brunette fished the bottle from her hands and poured it down her throat. Regina winced and coughed, "brings back memories. I'm quite surprised it's not your usual vodka, Ruby,"

Ruby grimaced as she bowed her head to Regina, "it wasn't on special at the shops so,"

"Ah," Regina smiled as she handed the bottle back, licking a single drop from her top lip. Regina exhaled and clasped her hands together in front of her,

"Like I was saying, Ms Swan, I require your assistance at the back door. Ruby, do you remember where you are?"

"Yep, front door and car park got it Ma'am," she saluted Regina, winked at me and strode off towards the slowly filling car park.

"Oh dear, that alcohol has hit me quite sudden," Regina blinked her brown eyes a few times and pulled open the hall's door, "this way, Ms Swan," curling her finger at me, motioning me to follow. She could probably be taking me to hell right now and I wouldn't care. The music hit me right in the face and clouded my thoughts. How did Regina even allow this? She wasn't the type of woman to let loud thumping club music play in a room filled with teenagers. The door clicked shut behind me and I was thrown into complete darkness; the swirling disco ball's light not penetrating over by the dark door. I saw a flash of white teeth and suddenly Regina's hands were in mine, dragging me through the throng of dancing students. I was certain I felt a kid pinch my butt. Shit.

Regina attempted some dorky movements of pulling and pushing our hands as we squeezed through to the back door. How the hell was I at a stupid school event, dancing with a hot teacher to club music? I was way in over my head.

She pressed her butt into the door and we escaped into the night.

"Holy hell, that was a little bit nuts,"

Regina clicked her fingers at several pairs of students who were making out, "hands off and back inside," she snipped. I yanked out the flask and prayed to God that this would work as Regina watched the students disappear back inside. The door shut loudly and the sound of club music pulsated out to us.

"Gold was never allowed anything like this," Regina leaned back against the cement wall and smirked at me. My stomach was quickly set alight and I seriously needed to drown it in some of Ruby's whiskey.

"So how are you allowed to do it then?"

"Maine's head of Education has had the biggest thing for me since he laid eyes on me at my interview," Regina laughed, "stupid Sidney Glass,"

"He owns this place too? Sheesh, he made life a living hell for me at my old school," I unscrewed the cap and offered it to Regina who took it tentatively.

"I feel like you've picked up a few bad habits from our friend Ms Lucas," she pressed her lips to the flask and drank heavily. She didn't take her eyes off my lips as she flicked her tongue out to capture the single drop of whiskey that fell down her chin.

"And she has probably picked up a few habits from me, also," I stared out to the bare expanse of freshly trimmed grass and sighed,

"Oh? How so,"

"We both seem have the nasty habit of wanting to kiss beautiful brunettes when we are blind drunk,"  
I was pretty damn smug when Regina's eyes opened dramatically.

"Well, I'll say. Bottom's up, dear," she winked as she pressed a single finger to the bottom of the flask resting on my chin and pushed it up.

"You're not going to win that quickly, Ms Mills, but I'll waver slightly so you can get your ego boost," I chuckled as she stole the bottle angrily from my lips and sculled half the flask.

"Jesus Regina, did you even taste that?" She screwed the lid back on clumsily and pressed herself against me. Oh shit, oh no, I was not drunk enough for this yet. She ran a finger down my throat, pausing just at the collar of my suffocating dress.

"No, but you will," Regina's lips crashed onto mine, oh so hot and oh so furious. She sighed into my mouth and as I broke away to gasp she plunged her tongue into my mouth, stroking my own tongue. Shit, she sure as hell knew what she was doing with that damn wretched muscle of hers.

"Kiss me back Swan, come on, I know you want it," she purred into the shell of my ear, her hot breath caressing my earlobe. Yes, yes I wanted it but God, I needed more alcohol. I needed to sort of know what to do. Where do my hands go? How about my tongue? Do I wrap a leg around her thin waist? What do I do?

"Regina…I…" But Regina tugged my ponytail down and my chin shot up. My neck was now exposed to Regina. She lavished it with hot open mouthed kisses and I'm pretty damn sure I was seeing stars.

"What's the matter? Nervous?" she smiled into my throat as she grazed her teeth over my collarbone,

"Uh, yeah, actually,"

Regina's movements paused, "what? Really,"

She looked up at me through her thick eyelashes. I had to stifle a laugh at her shock,

"Yeah Mills, it's not every day I get a hot lady demanding sex from me behind the school hall, whoa,"

Her hand brushed over my boobs as she rested it against my hip, pushing me back against the wall.

"I'm sure I can guide you…" She yanked up my short dress, "after all, teaching is what I do best,"

"Regina you are not banging me up against a wall of the school hall," I gritted through clench teeth as she bent down and ran delicate fingers over my tight-clad thighs. She pouted at the small wet patch in between my legs. Regina cupped it with her hand and I groaned,

"Your wetness says different dear,"

I was furious, furiously aroused. Stupid body betraying me to the hottest woman I had ever laid eyes on. I wrenched down my dress over Regina's exploring hands, "no,"

Regina huffed as she straightened herself. I couldn't help but notice her nipples were quite noticeable through her thin white blouse. Did I really turn her on like that? I may be able to win this bet a little quicker than intended; I had restraint, she did not.

"Fine, you won't let me work my magic? Time to work yours Ms Swan," Her eyes narrowed at the door.

"What?"  
"Dance with me, Emma, let's see how long I last," Had she lost her mind?

"Regina, there are students in there!"

"Better make it quick than dear, you of all people know that I don't like to be kept waiting," she grabbed my hand and led me inside the building. Ruby was right; I had signed my death warrant with this woman.

I downed the last of the whiskey, hiding the flask behind an overflowing bin. Regina kept her hungry eyes on me as she shed her navy jacket and cracked her knuckles. She looked so goddamn hot in the faded light and high waisted trousers and heels, and God, I couldn't figure out for the life of me why I keep refusing her advances. Wait, maybe because I was a stubborn little shit, or maybe just scared of what would happen.

We stood in a little sectioned off bit just by the back door so we were still sort of on duty but hidden away from prying eyes.

"Next song Ms Swan, you're all mine,"

I wonder if this was a good time to mention to the salivating Principal that as a youth with Henry, I had to work illegally in strip club in between foster houses. No else would hire a girl with no accreditations and with a baby under her arm. They were kind enough I guess; they didn't ask, and I didn't tell. As far as they knew, I was of age.

It was time for a little surprise for little old Ms Regina Mills.

I closed my eyes and let my mind wander back to my teens and early twenties; I was dressed in a scant leather outfit in towering heels, flaunting a red haired wig on a bright neon stage to thumping house music. I allowed the memories flood my body, my hips swaying slightly.

"Emma, what are you doing?" Regina whispered as the song died down.

"Showing you a good time Ms Mills," suddenly, I was back there, in that sweaty room, going by the name of Tara. My eyes opened and Regina instantly licked her lips. The next song exploded through the speakers and I almost laughed at the irony; it was totally my favourite jam of the old Swedish House Mafia's.

"Emma, I was joking, you don't need to prove anything, I,"

I pressed my finger to her lip and her eyes widened, "shush Regina, like you said, you rule this school and I need to serve, yes?"

Regina's head bobbed. I pulled her lip down like a fish hook and damn, her teeth were so white. I licked my own lips as I eased my finger into her hot mouth, "suck it,"

Regina did what she was told and swirled her tongue around my single finger. I almost came right there and then as her tongue worked miracles.

"Let's see how far you can get without taking any of my clothes off, as, you know, this is a school event," I removed my finger from her mouth and slowly grinded my hips into hers to the erratic beat of the music. It was in my job description as a dancer to make the men come without even taking a single article of clothing off, so I guess I had it easy tonight.

"Emma, how," but I didn't listen. I never listened when I was in this state. I turned myself around and pressed my arse into the apex of her thighs and Regina moaned; time to shine Emma, time to frigging shine. I put each foot on the outside of Regina's and dipped forwards, pushing myself hard into Regina's front. My hair brushed the floor as Regina's fingers found their way to my hips, egging me on. I flicked myself back up straight and swayed my body to the beat. Rocking my butt against the rough material of her pant suit, Regina pushed aside my hair and latched her mouth to the skin just below my ear. A single hand of hers came up and groped my breast. Regina was bloody everywhere and nowhere. I needed more of her on me; I needed her naked body against mine. I clenched my jaw tightly as she sighed onto my wet neck.

"Regina…" My voice was low and holy God I was so turned on right now. I put my hand on top of Regina's and guided it down over my dress until it rest just over my core.

"Tell me what do you want me to do?"

I scrunched my eyes shut once more and spun around; pressing her up against the opposite side of the wall.

"Nothing, this is my game to play," I growled as I shoved a needy thigh between hers. I grabbed the Principal's hand again and brushed her tense fingers against my centre, through the fabric. We both could feel the heat radiating off me.

"Shit Emma, let me…I…tell me," Regina's voice was instantly in my ear and her tongue drawing long licks against my neck, "what do you want me to do?"

She tugged on my pony tail again and I moaned as she nipped at my throat.

"You do nothing, stand there and just take it,"

"Dear, I will not watch you get off by yourself, not while I'm here anyway,"

And classic Regina was back; hornier than I was and taking complete and utter control of the situation.

"Oh, is that so? What makes you think I'm not faking it?"

"Your nipples are like daggers in my chest dear, there's no way to fake that," She giggled softly into my ear. Shit this was going to be a long night and I'm pretty sure that this was the second time this song had been on. How do I stop this? Do I even want to stop this?  
"Now are you going to let me fuck you like the little tease that you are?"

Holy shit, Regina was talking dirty to me. Oh sweet Jesus, yes.

"What part of no removal of clothes do you not seem to understand?" I breathed,

"You underestimate my abilities Ms Swan," She pulled up my dress once again, but only to my hips, and yanked down my tights slightly.

"Regina, school event…We can't," My heart was in my throat. No, oh god no this was not happening. Regina was not going to do this. She was a respected woman in this society.

"Watch me," she stated coolly as she squatted down to my stomach. I wasn't sure if she actually meant for me to watch her but either way, I couldn't help but glance down at the brown eyes that burned with lust. Holy hell, no, no, so hot, stop it. She split my thighs easily and I gasped as her hot breath hit my core. Holy hell yes, I was not ready for that at all. Before I could even stop her, Regina's tongue was in my centre and I yelped, bucking my hips into her open mouth. This woman was talented, that's for sure. I smashed my head back into the cement, biting my bottom lip. My knees went weak as she lapped enthusiastically. There is it was, that familiar yet foreign sensation building up at the bottom of my spinal cord. Regina grazed her fingernails down my thigh then rested it up on my stomach. I grabbed her hand and squeezed it; she squeezed back as her tongue hit a rather sensitive spot.

"Christ Regina, fuck,"

I could have almost felt Regina purr happily into me.

"Let yourself go dear, we're mid song anyway; not like anybody will be able to hear us,"

That was all I needed, that simple statement. I threw my head back as the waves of pleasure erupted over my skin. I shoved my fist into my mouth to quieten my moan but Regina tugged at my elbow,

"I want to hear it," So I did, oh boy I so let her know.

"Say my name, what's my name," She sucked my core once more and I gasped,

'Regina, holy shit, you're Regina,"

"Who owns you?" She growled. Stars danced in my eyes; I needed her lips back on my skin.

"You do,"  
"Good girl," She trailed her wet tongue over my hip and bit it softly. Did Regina Mills just eat me out in a goddamn school social event? Will I ever wrap my head around it? Hell no. My cheeks were definitely flushed and I really needed to sort out breathing before I could even see anyone else other than Regina. The teacher just smirked at me and wiped some misplaced lipstick off her bottom lip as the song finished abruptly.

"If I'm not mistaken Ms Swan, our friend Ms Lucas is looking for you," she jutted her chin towards a frantic looking brunette, "the evening is almost over and I'm sure you would like to get home and have a shower,"  
"I'll moan your name while I rub my shower puff over my boobs, shall I Regina?"

Regina's eyes glistened, "oh, please do dear, it would make me ever so grateful," she clasped her hands in front of her again. I raked my eyes over her heaving body and narrowed them,

"For someone who was so desperate to have me, you haven't asked me to return the favour," I titled my head slightly to the side.

"Don't you worry Emma; you begging for more later on your contract will be the best gift you could ever give me," she leaned forward, her voice tainted with her own arousal, "dear," I shuddered as her breath caressed my cheek.

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a/n: I literally have no idea what the fuck came over me when I wrote this chapter, I can only apologise.  
*_turns on hose and aims it at glorious readers_*


	9. Chapter 9

a/n: for the record I have no beta so all mistakes are my own. I am literally the shittest writer when it comes to 'tense' so sorry :(  
short chapter, kinda a fill in one.  
Enjoy xo

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Ruby dropped Henry and me off that night, even though she was pretty drunk herself. We were definitely quality teachers. We had managed not to hit anything or run into cops, which I'm still trying to figure out how. It wasn't a surprise that Mary Margaret had gone home with David, or she'd dropped him off or something else equally as stupid.

Ruby's convertible pulled smoothly into my driveway and she smiled at me as she killed the engine. Henry was clearly giddy at the fact he was inside Ms Lucas's car. I regularly checked the backseat through the mirror during the entire trip back, and he did not take his eyes off the soft wavy hair of his Art teacher.

"I, uh, kid; I've got to talk to Ms Lucas for a second alright?" I passed him the front door key and he sighed loudly,  
"See you tomorrow Henry," Ruby flashed my son a killer smile and he blushed as he fell awkwardly out of the car.

"Your ruining my son, you know that right?" I laughed as she swatted me on the leg.

"Come on, it's just a crush. It'll blow over. I mean, he's only known me for like seven months, he'll be fine," She rolled her eyes childishly as she unplugged her seat belt and smashed her back into the seat comfortably.

"Seven months can do a lot of damage,"

"He's thirteen Emma; he'll get over it," She closed her eyes and took a deep breath as I watched Henry disappear inside the house and switch a light on.

* * *

"So?"

I turned my attention back to the brunette, "so what?"

Ruby cracked an eye open to me, "you know…"

"You know what?"

"Did you…how do I put it so you don't cringe too much…ah, did you do the 'do'?"

My cheeks flushed as Ruby grinned, "you totally banged Regina,"

"Other way around actually,"

That had her attention. She sat up straight and her eyes went wide, "what?"

"Yeah,"

"Shit, how did you even manage that? I thought she was going to make you beg or some sick twisted shit,"

I fiddled with the ring on my finger, "apparently, I can be quite persuasive when I want to be,"

"Details, now," Her eyes narrowed as she grabbed my wrist. I shrugged and went to open the car door but Ruby locked it, "oh no, you're not getting away that quickly missy, spill,"

"Well I followed your advice and took Regina outside. We kind of chatted for a little bit and then I offered her some whiskey. Which was a bloody godsend, thank you," Ruby nodded her head in acknowledgement, "and then she said I'd picked up a habit of drinking at school things from you and then I said that we both had the same problem of wanting to kiss brunettes when we're were drunk,"

Ruby let out a bark of laughter, "Did you actually say that about me? Shit man, it was one time and Regina was dressed up as a slutty Ms Santa Claus, what would you do in that situation?"

"Anyway," I refused to let that particular image of Regina stay permanent within my mind, "I sculled half the rest of the whiskey and Regina was staring at me like I was naked and then she kissed me,"

Ruby's mouth fell open, "she kissed you? Like, kiss-kissed you or?"

"Like, I had no idea tongues were capable of the shit she was doing to my mouth,"

Ruby groaned, "Ugh, she so hot, go on,"

"I was stunned so I didn't do anything at first. Then she asked if I was nervous and said yeah and then she bloody yanked my dress up and touched me…you know, all down there,"

"Whoa," Ruby breathed,

"…saying that she was a teacher and she'd teach me because that's what she does best"

"How…are you even doing this, holy hell girl," Ruby's eyes had darkened considerably and I made a mental note not to judge her or call her up on it.

"And then because I was nervous she took me inside to the dark and said that I had to dance with her… so she pulled me to this little area and then um,"

"She fucked you?"

"Ah no," I chewed my lip as I tried to best word my next sentence,

"You fucked her?"

"No! God Ruby let me speak,"

"You guys fucked each other,"

"Christ, no; ages ago, I used to be a…stripper of sorts, and I kind of…um,"

"Dude," Ruby leaned back and looked me over with shocked eyes, "no way,"

"Yeah way; I guess you can figure out the rest,"

"Hell yeah but I want to hear it from you. Your awkwardness about it is adorable,"

I glared at her, "Fine. So, remember when Swedish House Mafia played?"

"Yeah, the sound guys accidentally put one of their songs on twice,"

So that did happen, and I wasn't going nuts, awesome.

"That used to be my song back then and I kind of, just you know, let go,"

"You stripped for Mills?"  
"No, no. My job used to be that I'd dance and touch the customers without taking my own clothes off,"

"Oh boy," Ruby puffed out her cheeks and egged me to continue,

"She definitely wasn't expecting it and next minute, she had me up against the back wall with her head between my legs,"

"Whoa" Ruby repeated, "But you're still wearing your outfit, which is pretty cute by the way, like how you arrived?"

"She didn't take any of my clothes off,"

At that point, Ruby rested her head against the leather headrest and banged it repeatedly,

"Did she dirty talk you?"

It was dark in the car and I wasn't going to lie to my best friend, "so much dirty talk,"

"She's actually the hottest thing ever. I am so jealous,"

"Don't be. At least you didn't fuck your way into your permanent position of art teacher," I huffed crossing my arms.

"But if I had to bang Regina for the job, I would; tenfold,"

"You're incredible," I rolled my eyes and unlocked the door, "am I free to go from this interrogation, Ms Lucas?"

"Might as well. I've got to get home anyway; I've a got a class first thing tomorrow morning, ugh,"

"I love Fridays because I don't start til after first break," I peeled myself from the leather seat as Ruby poked her tongue out at me,

"Because that's totally fair," she sighed, "damn you Ms Swan,"

"Night Ruby, try not to kill anyone,"

She reversed out onto the road, tooted her horn and waved.

* * *

As I entered the kitchen, Henry was dressed in his plaid pyjama bottoms, fetching a late night snack from the fridge.

"Oi, no; go to bed you little turd," I plucked the small tub of yoghurt from his hands and scowled at him,

"Mum, but I'm hungry," he pouted, his bright eyes sparkling. How the hell could I say no to that?

"Fine, but brush your teeth straight after and off to bed okay?"  
"Yep," He peeled the lid off and licked the yoghurt off it; some caught on his nose and I couldn't help but shake my head.

"What were you and Ms Lucas talking about?" Henry grabbed a spoon and banged the drawer closed with his hip.

"Huh? Oh nothing," I slipped off my shoes and stripped off my tights. I almost groaned at the memory of Regina's fingers and mouth being there only an hour ago.

"Was it about me?" He waggled his eyebrows at me,

"No, no, if it was about you, I would let you know kid, don't you worry,"

"Okay, then what were you talking about?"

"Someone's a bit nosy tonight," I grinned at him as I pushed my glasses up to my hairline and removed the constricting hair tie.

"Was it about Regina?" His face paled as my nostrils flared and jaw set, "Sorry, I didn't mean to…"

"It was nothing concerning Regina, so don't you dare ask!" I growled as I ripped the ring off my finger and slammed it down on the counter, "and its Ms Mills to you, got it kid?"

Henry nodded his head weakly, chunked his empty yoghurt container away and skipped off down the hallway to the bathroom. I instantly felt bad. I clenched my fingers hard against the wooden counter and snorted.

"Henry!" I dipped my head for a second and pushed off, padding towards the bathroom where the usual noise of teeth scrubbing floated from the open door. He glanced at me nervously through the mirror and kept his eyes set on the bottle of toothpaste that rested on the marble.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap, I"

But Henry wrapped his arms around my stomach, his toothbrush poking into my boob. I kissed his head,

"It wasn't my place to ask, sorry Mum,"

"Nah it's alright kid, you're just curious. Regina is a touchy subject for me right now,"

"Why?" He broke away and spat a glob of blue toothpaste into the sink. I sighed. How the hell was I supposed to answer that? Why was this crazy woman even an issue to talk about? She's just a woman, she's just my boss…and now possible fuck buddy.

"I don't know just yet, she's just…I don't know," I really had no clue what she was.

"But do you like her though? I mean, that could explain a lot," Henry wiped his mouth on the hand towel as I leaned against the glass shower door.

"Hell if I know; what do you mean by, 'it explains a lot'?"

"Well, I kind of like Ms Lucas and I get angry when any one talks about her," He shrugged; a blush crept up his bare chest and tinted his cheeks.

"Hmm, maybe, but that's not for you to worry about Henry. I got to sort this out for myself, alright? Now, bed time sir," I hugged him again,

"So I shouldn't be surprised if she comes around for dinner or if I wake up and she's there?"

I gulped loudly. Holy shit, I had not thought of that. Holy shit, that's right; she wanted dinner from me. Just, holy shit.

"Uh, yeah, don't freak out," I gave him a weak smile as my brain threw ideas around my little skull like a pair of damn loose cannon balls.

"Okay. Goodnight," He left me alone in the bathroom, clutching my stomach. I hoped my tight grip was strong enough to crush the butterflies. Regina Mills, at my house, eating my food with a son who's totally okay with it? Holy hell, this was not okay. This was nowhere near okay.

I groaned as I softly repeatedly punched myself in the stomach. This was not okay. I stared down at the uncapped bottle of toothpaste and figured I might as well go to bed as well.


	10. Chapter 10

a/n: I am back in England and updates are gunna be hella more frequent, weee!  
Happy reading!  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

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"Now, the tale of Cleopatra and Antony is one of the most famous love stories in history. She was an Egyptian Pharaoh who travelled over to Rome to…"

A hand shot into the air. I sighed, "Yes Peter?"

I was totally on a roll and this kid blew it. Peter had a terrible habit of asking completely stupid and usually irrelevant questions when it came to my history class. Apparently he was all sugar and kindness in Mary Margaret's classes, but a little bitch in mine.  
"What's going on with you and Ms Mills Miss?"

The whole class was suddenly paying attention. Fear dripped down my spine and pooled at the bottom of my stomach like a weight.

"Really, do you think this is relevant? Anyway, Antony fell instantly in love with Cleopatra and offered…"

Another hand went up.

"She was dancing with you last night and I'm pretty sure you guys disappeared outside," another boy asked,

"Yeah, Mills totally told off my boyfriend and I to go inside," a girl complained. I glared in the general direction of that last comment,

"But Antony's council didn't approve of the marriage and tried to break them up…"  
"Miss, are you going to answer our questions?"  
"No. Now, Antony escaped Rome with Cleopatra in tow so that they could,"

"I'll bet you my canteen money for three days that they're banging," someone whispered loudly.

Ok that's it.

"Dude, seriously?"

I turned on the lights and the entire class groaned. The projection on the whiteboard lightened considerably as I glowered at my class.

"Why does it matter to any of you what Ms Mills and I do in our spare time, okay? It's our private lives so I suggest you all shut up before I give you all detentions,"

"…totally banging,"

I threw my arms up in frustration, "my God you lot. You know what? Because I am that furious with all of you, you guys can research this story by yourselves and write me a three thousand word essay on the pros and cons of this relationship," I snapped.

"What the hell," there was a general uproar as I turned my back and wiped down the board,

"No you guys don't get to just pry into my life and demand explanations for everything," I yelled as I slammed the duster down onto the desk. The bell rang screamed just outside the classroom door and I exhaled in relief,

"I'm expecting those essays in a fortnight. Don't think that I will forget about them if I happen to be in a good mood that day," I growled as they packed up their books, "class dismissed you bunch of nosy parkers,"

I slammed the door loudly and children skittered away like cockroaches in the sunlight.

"Rough day, huh?" I yanked out the key and wrapped my lanyard around my neck,

"Understatement of the year," I half expected it to be another English teacher but was surprised when Kathryn Midas smiled at me.

"Oh, hey Kathryn, sorry I was expecting someone else,"

"That's okay," She tucked her marking closer to her chest as we drifted towards the staffroom, "you seem pretty pissed; is there anything I can help with?" The blonde pushed open the door and I grimaced as I spotted Regina leaning against the table, her back to me.

"Uh unless you know how to stop kids from being nosy little shits than no," I gulped as I fetched a bottle of water from the staff fridge,

"Oh man, yeah don't worry. They do that to all the new staff. Um, I'm going to pop out for a cigarette, did you want to join?" She fished out a small silver box from her red leather handbag. Regina turned and smiled at us like less than twenty four hours ago she did not have her head between my legs, "I was wondering when my two favourite ladies were going to return back from the depths of hell,"

She licked her lips as she stirred a cup of black coffee, her eyes wandering over my last minute ensemble of a loose grey tee shirt, dark washed jeans and black boots.

"And by the sounds of things, you're about to go and quicken your trip to hell; Kathryn you know how much I hate you smoking," Regina pouted but winked at me. What the hell did that mean? This woman was more confusing than a basic Sudoku.

"Yes well, my body my rules Regina. Emma and I will be back soon,"

"Oh?" Regina lifted a pair of perfectly manicured eyebrows at me; death by brows, that's for sure.

"I see not only have you picked up the habit of drinking at school events but now you're smoking. How charming Ms Swan,"

I rolled my eyes as Kathryn and I disappeared out the back door. But not before Regina skipped towards us, her stilettos clicking on the linoleum flooring.

"Ah Kathryn, a quick word," She grabbed the blonde with a fierce grip and yanked her back into the staffroom. I leaned against a peeling cream handrail and watched the two friends chat quietly. Regina's brown eyes kept flicking to me and I had almost seen more eye rolls from Henry than what Kathryn was doing. Suddenly Regina pulled Kathryn into a hug and let her go towards me. I was baffled at the two. Regina treated Kathryn like another staff member yet Mary Margaret had said they were best friends. Maybe they were on friendlier terms outside of school hours.

"Okay, good to go?" Kathryn breathed, her cheeks slightly flushed.  
"Ready as I'll ever be,"

* * *

It wasn't always that I smoked. I did do it a lot when I was younger but gradually weaned myself off them as I got older and stopped completely when I fell pregnant with Henry. It was rare now that I'd do it; only when I was with other smokers or I was completely blind drunk.

It kind of felt good to have the little stick of death in between my teeth again, but I don't think I'd ever admit that too proudly just yet. Kathryn lit hers and took a deep drag, handing me the tiny yellow lighter.

"Just what you need after a lesson of Maths with juniors," She leaned her head back and exhaled into the clear blue sky.

"I'll second that," the lighter felt awkward in my hands and it took me several goes before I could even get a decent flame, "holy hell, that's the stuff,"

"Anyway, what were your kids asking about?" Kathryn picked at the rust on the fence we leaned against. I shrugged. How was I supposed to tell Regina's best friend that they were asking about Regina and mine's personal life?

"Just about Regina,"

"Oh" Kathryn's eyebrows furrowed, "is that all? Is that what got you so worked up?"

"Not necessarily," I took another drag and studied the dry leaves that brushed past as the wind blew. I didn't know how to exactly word it.

"I just… I don't know how to say it,"

"Nah you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. I'm just trying to help,"

"I know you and Regina are close so I don't really want to say anything too bad, you know?"

"Eh, I respect and tolerate the woman," Kathryn smirked, "that's probably about it,"

"Didn't you two work in maths together?"

"Yeah we did. But bloody Regina got a promotion and a pay raise, and to be honest, I've been kind of jealous," Kathryn shrugged the idea off like it didn't bother her at all but I could see the flash annoyance in her eyes, "but I don't hate her,"  
"I'd hate her," I smiled as I flicked the ash off,

"Of course you'd hate her newbie but she's actually a pretty decent person,"

"You don't say," I chuckled,

"What's that supposed to mean?" She turned her entire body towards me, curious. I chewed my lip anxiously,

"I just mean, I know about that game she plays with…you know, the blonde staff," I eyed the maths teacher's blonde hair, but Kathryn just laughed.

"Oh boy, Regina's playing that game with you?"

"Yah,"

"You're in deep, my friend," she tapped her cigarette, "has she done…anything?"

I guess Kathryn was hinting towards whatever the hell happened last night at the School Disco.

"Oh yeah,"

"Oh no," Kathryn kneaded the skin of her forehead, "oh no, no,"

"Yeah, that's the general reaction I have been getting from people," I frowned as she sighed,

"Regina plays it with all the staff, not just the blondes, except she does try a little harder with us,"

"Did you crack?"

"Hell no," Kathryn scoffed, "I am one hundred percent straight,"

"Right,"  
"Anyway, it's a weird power slash ego thing she does. She toys with us but never ever makes an actual move,"  
"So that fact she made the first move and has practically been groping me since I turned up at this joint is a bad thing?"

Kathryn's eyes widened, "holy shit, really? That's a bloody miracle…but also, kind of bad,"

"What does it mean though?" I ground the stub of my cigarette in the dirt and sniffed. Kathryn followed suit,

"It means she's genuinely interested in you and not just…toying".

"How is that bad?"

Kathryn glanced at me as we headed back into the school grounds, "wait, so you'd be fine with getting into a relationship with Regina?"

"Hell yeah, I mean, of course. The woman's a babe,"  
"But she's mental,"

"Nothing I can't handle Kathryn,"

"Fine," Kathryn pushed open the staffroom door to a now empty room, "don't say I didn't warn you though".

* * *

a/n: DID ANY OF YOU SEE MY LITTLE SNEAKY INCLUSION OF QUEENS AS KINGS? no? cleopatra and antony? yes? excellent ;)


	11. Chapter 11

a/n: double chapter surprise, fuck yeah.  
don't get used to it though homies and homettes.  
TIME TO GET SOME MORE SWANQUEEN INTERACTION HAPPENING. yay!

* * *

I guess that you could say I was avoiding her. And by her, I mean Regina. She appeared everywhere at the most inconvenient of times so I was constantly holding my breath every time I went around a corner or ducked into the staffroom for a quick bite to eat. Most days I stayed to my classroom as I chowed down my usual salad sandwich and rosy red apple. Mary Margaret had noticed, and so had Ruby.

"You have to face her one day Emma," Ruby leaned against the door as I picked out a rather limp piece of lettuce from my sandwich. I yelped and dropped my sandwich into my lap; another pair of perfectly good jeans ruined by a slash of mustard and watery tomatoes.

"No use hiding away in here,"

"I'm not hiding…" I growled as I wiped the sauce off my trousers, "I'm just…"  
"Hiding," She smirked as she waltzed in, fiddling with her green lanyard covered in tiny wolf heads.

"I just don't deal very well with confrontation Ruby,"

Ruby yanked away one of the plastic chairs from behind a desk and sat down, crossing her legs.

"Come on its Friday. If anything goes wrong, she'll forget about it by Friday. And anyway, this is not the Emma I know. What happened to the sassy flirtatious woman from last week?"

"I spoke to Kathryn…"

"Regina's little bitch?" I winced at her term of affection,

"I prefer the term, Regina's little snitch,"

"Yeah, and?"

"Uh, Regina's not playing," I picked nervously at a piece of stubborn sticky tape that had been left on this table since God knows when.

"What do you mean, Regina's not playing?"

"Apparently Regina wants to get in a relationship with me," the words felt unnatural leaving my chapped lips.

"She's got a funny way of showing it," Ruby sneered as she rested her elbows on her knees,

"It's a power play thing that she does. Just to see if you respond, if you don't, she'll leave you be, if you do though…"

"Right, so like a lion toying with an almost dead antelope to see if it's still kicking,"

"To a degree, yes,"

"That's…" she titled her head to the left slightly, "kind of hot, you know,"

"Jesus Ruby, how," I stood up and ran my hands through my hair, "how is that even _remotely_ hot?"

"Come on Swan, she's totally possessive and so she's claiming you for her own. Who knows what glorious things she'll do to you when she knows you're all hers,"  
Come to think of it, it was pretty sexy. As much as I didn't like to be owned, or hell, labelled as someone's property… being Regina's and only Regina's, sounded quite appealing.

"I actually hate how much I am agreeing with you right now," I sighed as a cheeky grin spread across the Art teacher's face.

"That's more like it Swan," Ruby stood up and clamped her hands on my shoulders as I slumped forward slightly, "think positive man, this could be bloody brilliant,"  
"Or the final signature on my death warrant,"

"Sheesh, what's the worst that can happen?"

"I get the feeling she's the kind of woman who'd rip your heart out if you glanced at her the wrong way,"

"Then glance at her the right way, if you know what I mean," she winked.

"You're as bad as my students,"

"I am better than your students and you know it," she muttered as I emptied the rubbish from my plastic transparent lunchbox into the bin underneath the desk. Mary Margaret could deal with the weird orange peel smell that wafted from there.

"That's the worst bit," I groaned as we left the classroom. I felt a tonne better knowing I had Ruby's approval to go ahead with whatever the hell I was meant to be going ahead with. Was I going to put a label on it? What the hell was I going to do?  
"Just invite her around for dinner or something. Or take her out for dinner, bitches love that shit,"

"Oh my actual God Ruby, what the hell,"

"What? Regina ate you for dinner, might as well return the favour with some spaghetti,"

I almost choked on those words.

"Ruby," I paled as she giggled loudly, throwing her head back and shaking her hips slightly.

"Your face was priceless Swan,"

"I am this close to slapping the shit out of you,"

"Work place harassment, I will not tolerate it," Ruby wiggled her finger under my nose, as she pressed her butt into the staffroom door, opening it,  
"Glad that you have learnt that valuable work ethic, Ms Lucas,"

Ruby squeaked as the edge of the door bumped into Regina's thigh.

"Shit Regina, you scared the crap out of me. Christ, you really need a cat collar with a bell on it or something," Ruby held her chest as Regina smiled cruelly.

"I'm sure that can be arranged Ms Lucas, wouldn't you agree, Ms Swan?"

Holy hell, the sudden image of Regina clad entirely in leather sitting on her hunches with a lead and collar attached to her throat flooded my imagination. I had to restrain the inhuman growl that sat at the bottom of my throat.

"Um, yeah, yeah I guess so," I mumbled weakly as I avoided her ravenous eyes. Shit, she's got to stop staring at me like that or I'm going to have to bang on her right on the desk right now. Ruby glanced at my sudden lack of voice.

"You okay Swan?"

"Yeah, I uh, just need some water," I nudged past the two brunettes and headed towards the kitchenette. Why the hell was I nervous? She was just a woman. Regina was just a person like me or Ruby. Who am I kidding? No she's not; she's a sex goddess of sorts, shit. I twisted the tap furiously and was instantly saturated as the cold water hit the silverware at the bottom of the sink and ricocheted straight up into my chest and open mouth.

"Fuck," I slapped the spout of the tap away as Ruby burst into a fit of laughter. What sounded like the giggles of an angel reached my ears and I realised Regina had also joined in with Ruby. I brushed off sopping hair off of my forehead and glared at the two women; both who were using each other to stand up so they wouldn't fall over in a bout of laughter.

"I actually hate you two," I growled as I snatched a chequered hand towel from the counter and scrubbed my face and neck dry.

"Emma, Emma oh sweet Emma, you're killing me here," Ruby sucked a breath through clenched teeth. "Man, if I didn't have a class right now I'd stay and laugh at you, but oh man,"

Ruby patted Regina on the shoulder timidly and left as the Principal wiped a tear of joy from her right eye.

"Ms Swan, do you have a class right now?" She leaned against one of the hard back chairs and crossed her arms; a flicker of a smile still graced her lips.

"No," I grumbled as I rubbed irritably at the ever growing water stain across my blue buttoned down blouse.

"Dear, you're not going to get it dry quicker if you do that," Regina tilted her head like she was scolding a child,

"Oh and how do you suppose I do it then, Ms Know-it-all?"

Regina clucked her tongue and shook her head as she stepped towards me,

"Now, now Ms Swan, no need to get snappy," she plucked the soaked hand towel from my fingers and chucked it back onto the counter.

"First of all, you need a dry cloth," Regina bent down and pulled a red cloth from the bottom drawer. Her arse looked great in that dress.

"Second, you need to stop staring at my arse," she chimed as she pushed the drawer closed. Damn.

"And three," Regina leaned back up and smiled as I ripped my eyeballs off of that perfectly shaped rear end, "you need to air it,"

"How do I go about doing that then Regina?"

She didn't answer for a while. She dabbed the cloth against my shirt, her brown eyes watching the way the wet material stuck to my toned stomach.

"You…got…got to air it out," Regina muttered it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Yes thank you Captain Obvious but how do that? I don't exactly see a hairdryer anywhere,"

"Take it off and hang it up,"

What now? Oh no. Was I wearing my fancy push up bra today? Oh no. Wait, yes I was; hell yeah, instant confidence boost.

"Excuse me Ms Mills?"

Regina's eyes widened like she hadn't realised she'd said that statement out loud.

"I mean, you don't have too, it was a simple suggestion Ms Swan," she damped her lips with a quick swipe of her pink tongue. She was in a mood, and by the way her eyes stayed put to my soaking shirt, a mood that I wanted to twist to my advantage.  
"Oh Regina I would, oh how I would, but the fact is, I don't a have a spare shirt," I pouted as she tugged at the hem of my grey shirt, her eyes quickly flicking to mine when I didn't stop her movements. Her thumbs brushed my hip bones and it felt like she left a trail of fire against my skin.

"I guess then you could use…your body heat Ms…Ms Swan," Regina was flustered. Regina was never flustered. But she shot me a weak smile and spun on her heel, her back to me as she yanked open the fridge door behind her. This moment was a make or break and holy hell I was going to make it while I broke the darling Ms Regina Mills. I watched Regina as she hummed, searching through the assortment of jams and juices in the fridge, clearly looking for something that wasn't there. Maybe she used the cold as a way of cooling down. I smiled to myself as I pulled my hair from its low braid and ran my fingers through it; splaying my blonde waves over my shoulders and down my back. I had to make quick work of this was going to be successful. I knew Regina particularly enjoyed the day I rocked up to school with the most intense bed hair because I had forgotten to brush it, so it was time to give her just that. I ruffled my hair up a little and made a ridiculously flamboyant sigh as I ripped at my shirt; the top four buttons popping loudly. Regina froze, her fingers curled around Mary Margaret's jar of marmalade. I couldn't help but smirk as Regina gently placed her thin cold fingers to the hollow of her neck.

"I guess you're right Regina, I'll just have to use my own body heat,"

In the reflective plastic of the fruit crisper in the fridge, I saw Regina close her eyes slowly and bite her bottom lip. I had her. I had her wrapped around my little finger right in this damn moment.

"If it's any help Ms Swan, I do have a spare shirt in my office,"

The tables have changed. Or maybe they were still in my favour considering I could accidently let her see me in my best bra. Which I might add, is super cute, turquoise and cost me a damn fortune.

"I think I've done well with this slight alteration, I may not need that shirt after all," I stated proudly as I rolled up my sleeves just past my elbows. The woman would have to be daft to let me run around the school in a shirt like this. If only she'd turn around and tell me that…

"Oh I'm sure you've done your best Ms Swan, but we work in a school of teenagers,"

"Nah, I think it's fine," Turn around, turn around, turn around Ms Mills. Have a look, tell me off. Do something.

Regina scoffed, "hardly,"

"You haven't even seen it," Boom. She had to turn around now. I eyed her and noticed how her body tensed for a millisecond, her knees clenching together and her calf muscles twitched. She sighed and dropped her head ever so slightly as she finely settled her curious fingers on a large apricot that sat atop a sandwich that clearly stated 'do not eat'.

"Fine Ms Swan, if you are so adamant about it…"

Wait for it. Wait for it.

Regina closed the fridge door, still clutching the apricot that definitely did not belong to her. She paused and turned. Her eyes went straight to my damp cleavage and her eyes glinted with the ever so familiar lust; Emma one, Regina zero. She rolled the fruit in between her hands as her eyes roamed delicately over my figure. Each time her eyes widened, my ego went that little bit higher.

"Uh," she cleared her throat as a visible shake rattled her body, "like I stated before Ms Swan," Regina licked her lips, "completely and utterly inappropriate for education," She drew a shaky breath and straightened her back and blazer.

"…they're just on the desk in here; I'll be one second class,"

Mary Margaret exploded through the staff door, her eyes fixed on a stack of files on the large wooden desk that filled the majority of the room.

"Oh! Regina…Emma," her eyes narrowed at my shirt, "Christ Emma, put those away, are you trying to scare the children?" she shook her head in disbelief at me and scooped up the papers.

"I was just about to get her a new shirt," Regina smirked at me as I awkwardly covered my chest,

"Yes please Ms Mills, good lord. Good day Ms Mills…_Emma_," Mary gave me one last weird look and disappeared through the door. It swung open slightly and I spotted an obedient line of fourteen years olds hanging around outside.

"Then it's settled; come with me,"

Regina didn't even check if I was following her. She was damn sure I was going to follow her and I hated myself ever so slightly that I actually trailed her up to the administration building like the lost puppy I was.


	12. Chapter 12

a/n: FAVOURITE CHAPTER  
it's like...**smut** and angst and regina-emma banter and sort of initiation of some kind of relationship? YEAH. so um, like, warning: **sexy office times** and emma putting her freaking foot in everything aha. weee, what fun.  
feel free to chat to me via tumblr at ant1ers. tumblr. com yeah? I'm pretty nice yo.  
cheers guys!  
Emma xo

* * *

I glowered at any student who even glanced my way. I was in such a shitty mood for a Friday and I was sure we were quite the sight; I was hunched over, hobbling, clutching at my ruined tee shirt guiltily as Regina strode in front smirking with her chin in the air like she was the fat cat that caught the canary. A few of the kids who'd spoke out that one frightful History lesson last week scoffed and sniggered at us.

"Ms Swan, take no notice of the students and hurry up," Regina clipped as she opened the door for me.

"Told you it was true," a little blonde girl giggled to a girl with brown curly hair beside her. I glared at the blonde; she sat in the back row of my History class.

"Ms Powell, do you not have better things to do in your spare time then stand outside the office and agitate my staff?"

The blonde girl paled and I poked her tongue out at her. Yes, real mature for a teacher. Regina was clearly suppressing a childish eye roll and instead opted for her trademark huff then glare with pursed lips.

"Ms Swan, if you please…" she motioned her hand towards the open door and I ducked inside.

"I have come to the conclusion that I have essentially hired a child, yes?" Regina stepped in front of me and smiled brightly at me. How the hell she'd managed to go from scary Principal to sassy hot lady in a matter of seconds scared me. I felt my cheeks flush as my eyebrows rose into my hairline.

"Oh come off it Ms Swan, I'm simply playing with you," she swatted her hand at me playfully as she punched in the code to the sealed off staff area. The door pinged and she rested her shoulder against it. The heavy door swung soundlessly against the thick brown carpet. She winked as she held the door open again for me. Okay, Regina was being unnecessarily kind towards me and I'm still not entirely sure how to respond.

"After you…Ms Swan," she whispered into my ear as I crossed the threshold into my own possible hell. The office was empty bare a single blonde wiry haired woman who tapped loudly at a computer.

"Afternoon Regina, keen for the weekend?" she beamed as she took a sip from a porcelain mug,

"Definitely; I've never wanted to get away from these children quicker," Regina swished off towards the main white washed hallway as I followed awkwardly.

"That's Mal, my assistant," her heels clicked on the floor, "but we all call her Maleficent,"  
"Maleficent?" I asked as Regina untangled a set of keys from inside her blazer pocket, "like the dragon lady from Sleeping Beauty?"

Regina hummed in agreement as she unlocked the Head Master's door. She pressed the door back until it clicked and nudged a door stop in the shape of a cat against it.

"Do I want to know why?" I poked the cat with the edge of my boot curiously as Regina made her way to a small black cupboard at the back of the room.

"Students are scared of her and she has a thing for crows," Regina swung the cupboard open and clucked her tongue as she looked at the thin stack of pressed shirts folded in the corner.

"Scared of her? She's tiny and red cheeked and…cute," I muttered. Regina chuckled as she bent down,  
"Malory is not cute when she's yelling at students about the clear differences between hexagons and pentagons. Trust me, I know,"

"Sheesh, crazy lady,"

"She's not crazy, she's just…_peculiar_, Ms Swan," Regina passed me a selection of three shirts; a maroon blouse, a silver button up or a white tee shirt. I grabbed the silver one. "I wouldn't hire her if she was nuts,"

"You hired me so," I shrugged as I unfolded the shirt out on Regina's perfectly organised desk. I smiled at Regina as I played with the buttons on my wet shirt. She grimaced at me,

"By pure chance dear, I would have terminated your employment now if I did not find you…suitable,"

"Hot, you mean," I grinned as she glared at my shirt which had bumped her perfect alignment of ball point pens.

"That too, but your teaching ethics are quite refreshing,"

"I'm a shit teacher Regina; you don't have to sugar coat it," I leaned my hip against her desk, crossing my arms as the Principal sighed. She stepped closer and fiddled with my rolled up sleeves; her eyes grazing across my slightly exposed chest.

"That's certainly not what I'm getting at Ms Swan,"  
"Emma," I clarified, "Please for the love of God, can you call me Emma. I feel like I'm being punished when you use Ms Swan,"

"Dear, I can punish you if you like," she had this glint in her eye that suggested that I do just that, just so she could have her wicked way with me. Not that I'd mind at all. "But you and I are both adults – even though I question that term with you most days – so I'm sure we can come to some kind of agreement,"

Was it just me or was it suddenly ninety degrees inside this room? I tugged awkwardly at the collar of my shirt, hoping to air it out a little. Regina tip-toed her slim fingers up my arm and wrapped them delicately around my neck. This felt ridiculously natural.

"Now, should we get you out of that wet shirt?" Her voice was low and husky and good God, I could drown myself in it.

"And by 'we', you mean 'I'?"

Regina scrunched up her nose in distaste, "if that's what you wish Ms Swan,"

"Emma," I rebuked, "and not necessarily…um, Regina,"

Regina raised an eyebrow at my last comment, "oh is that so?" she skimmed her hands down the front of my shirt,

"Geez, you're making me all hot and bothered when you look at me like that," I jerked away my head as her rosy lips neared my throat.

"Well it seems to me I've done my job then," Her cool breath caressed the sensitive skin just below my earlobe and I moaned quietly. Regina tittered at my response,

"Now, shirt…off Ms Swan,"

Clearly she was not going to start calling me Emma anytime soon so I scowled at her.

"Don't make me force it off you dear,"

"You'd like that wouldn't you Mills,"

"So very much so but I cannot do it if you are not willing; I will not be hit with lawsuit claims because of sexual harassment,"

She was good, oh boy was Regina good. She was not letting go without a fight. I rolled my head back and sighed up at the roof,

"Fine, can you at least close the door and blinds, like Mary Margaret said, I don't want to scare the children,"

Regina obediently closed the door. I heard the faint click of the lock going into place. There were butterflies smashing their tiny little heads against the lining of my stomach as she flicked the blinds up; suddenly throwing us into a warm dimness.

"Now," Regina edged forward, her nimble fingers going straight for the bottom of my blouse, "where were we?"

There was no way out of this now. She had me up against the cold stone wall, her hands making quick work of the bottom button. Shit, shit, shit. My sudden burst of sexual confidence had instantly disappeared when Regina laid her palms flat on my bare front. Her hands were so warm and felt so familiar and right, and God, I kind of hated it a little bit. This wasn't right. She shouldn't be so damn interested in me. How could a successful, hot Principal be remotely interested in a cruddy contract teacher like me? I was so easily replaceable in the education world.

"Regina, I" but she silenced me with a brutal and demanding kiss. I needed to turn my brain off. I needed to slip into the heaven that Regina was so willingly offering me. And damn, her hands were taking too long on the next button. I reached down and pried her off me as I ripped the shirt clean off my body. I shoved her against her desk, her butt instantly colliding with the hard wood. Regina attached her mouth to my neck and wrapped her legs around my waist. Right in that moment, I think I was living every boy's dream; banging the hot teacher on a desk. Well, not necessarily banging, just hard core making out at this point. Oh, wait. Regina was grinding on me. Shit. She pulled me closer to her by tugging me via my belt loops. I let my hands roam down over her curves and stopped to play with the zipper on her side. She slapped my hand away as I tried to jerk it down gracelessly.

"No, not now, later," she mumbled hotly as she trailed kisses down my neck. What do you mean 'not know later'? How long was this going to go for? I had class this afternoon. I think.

"Later?" I queried as she snatched my drifting hands and slapped them right onto her heavy breasts. Regina gasped as I squeezed her boobs; rolling them between my palms and pinching where I assumed the nipples were.

"Yes, later on Ms Swan. I will not let you fuck me in my office; that is what beds are made for,"

Great, so at some point, hopefully in the near foreseeable future, we will be at either one's houses, banging. I liked it, but also wanted to strangle the woman because I had to wait when she had me so easily at the School Disco.

"Fine by me Ms Mills," I purred into her ear, "my place or yours?"

"You still owe me spaghetti dear, don't you forget," she nibbled on my collarbone. Now I had to find a way to get Henry out the house because I could guarantee I would attempt sex on the kitchen counter before moving it to the bedroom.

"And I have the constant presence of a son Regina,"  
"And if you wanted me so bad, you'd use your imagination to get rid of him," she hummed as she laid the flat of her tongue against the base of my throat and dragged it up. Wait. Did she just insult me, because I felt insulted? I pulled away, staring her straight in the eye.

"What's the supposed to mean?"

Regina clenched her thighs, hoping to cage me in. She plucked nervously at the hem of my jeans.

"Well, we can't exactly engage in any sort of sexual behaviour while your son is around",

"Oh and why is that?"

I almost regretted immediately asking that question because Regina waggled her eyebrows at me suggestively, "because I can assure you, you won't be quiet."

"Me? Excuse me, I can make a girl come and groan until the cows come home," I scoffed as Regina smiled at my little rhyme.

"So sure of yourself Ms Swan; cocky almost. I like it,"

"Almost as much as my spaghetti," I quipped as the Principal groaned and rested her forehead on my chest.

"That sauce was divine. I am looking forward to this dinner arrangement,"  
"If you make that noise at my pasta sauce, I'm keen to see what other noises you are capable of making,"

Regina laughed softly and sighed against my skin as I ran my fingers through her soft hair. She'd loosened her killer grip from around my waist and I felt a nice constant circulation of blood flow head back down my legs.

"I've killed the mood, haven't I?"

"Yes very much so dear,"  
"Sorry," Regina peeled herself off of me and the lack of skin contact made me shiver. She smiled sweetly at me and pressed her lips to the skin just above my left boob.

"No matter Ms Swan, it was inappropriate of me to initiate such a situation anyway,"

"Do you ever use dumb words?" I asked as she slid off the desk, straightening her jacket. I stood awkwardly, covering my bare stomach with my hands. Regina snorted.

"Please Ms Swan, I am a woman who enjoys the finer things in life and that includes the extensive usage of a high vocabulary,"

"Yeah okay, but how does someone like me fit into all of that?"

Regina's fingers froze on the silver shirt that had somehow ended up on the floor.

"Whatever to do you mean dear?"

"Come off it Regina; I'm a middle class citizen who lives in a rental on the other side of town with a thirteen year old son with no father figure, and…and…you," I motioned to her impeccable sense of fashion, manicured fingernails and shiny preened hair.

"And what,"  
"And you're perfect; a little bit crazy I'll say, but perfect,"

Regina studied the tops of her high heels as she chewed the inside of her mouth.

"Emma, I am not perfect".

"No, you really are Regina. Like, I'm pretty sure we are talking about the same banging hot Regina Mills here,"

She smiled sadly, "Emma…"

"Fine, you can disagree with me now, but sooner or later you're going to have to believe me," I growled as I snatched the shirt out of Regina's shaking hands and stuck my arm through one of the sleeves. Regina avoided my eyes as she quietly helped me into the silver blouse. I let my hands hang beside my sides as she sighed.

"You took that other shirt off, I'd like to put this one on you," she mumbled tenderly. I didn't stop her. I guess she needed this to wrap her head around the statement I had angrily yelled at her moments ago. Her knuckles brushed my tense stomach as she fastened the bottom button. She leaned down and planted an open mouth kiss just above the button; just below my belly button. I gasped as she straightened herself again. Regina bit her lip as she fastened the second one and leaned down again.

I wasn't sure why she was doing this but I wasn't going to stop it. I let my eyes droop as I felt her hot tongue briefly on my skin. She continued this torturous routine with every button until she reached the last top one. Regina glanced at my lips as she popped the button through the hole. I bowed my head slightly and brushed my lips against hers.

"God, I want you so bad," I brought my hands to either side of her face and pushed my tongue into her mouth hungrily. She moaned enthusiastically.

"I'm going to cook you the best pasta you've ever tasted,"

"And I'm going to fuck you so hard; you won't be able to walk straight for a week,"

"Looking forward to it Ms Mills,"

"Now buzz off before I change my mind and completely ravage you on my desk," Regina kissed me quickly again and squeezed my butt.

"Good because I have a class to teach. How would I ever explain it to them?" I winked as she opened the blinds and chucked my old shirt back into the cupboard.

"I'm sure you can use your imagination,"

"Don't doubt that for a second Regina; you have yet to see what I can do with a bit of rope and a can of whipped cream,"

Regina moaned loudly as she pulled open the door. It was a few degrees cooler out in the hall.

"Good day Ms Swan," Regina raised her chin as another teacher headed down the corridor towards us.

"Good day Ms Mills,"

* * *

PS FanFiction has just sent me a whole lot of emails from like the last month that I hadn't received and holy shit, I love you all, especially those who 'liked' me as a favourite author! I want to hug you all. thank you, thank you, thank you! xoxoxox


	13. Chapter 13

a/n: yo guys, if there is any sort of situation (sexual or normal; and when i mean sexual not hard core shit, like emma under regina's desk when she's in the middle of a meeting? i mean, WHOOPS, spoiler alert for another future chapter...) any situation you'd like me to play around with slash place these darlings in, feel free to pm me on here or inbox me on tumblr at ant1ers. tumblr. com :) if i use ya idea, i will shout you out in that particular chapter :) :)  
(i'm NOT running out of ideas, i have a shit tonne of my own, but you guys seem to have quite...vivid imaginations so)  
Happy reading! x  
Emma

* * *

"Oh good, you've covered yourself up,"

Mary Margaret barged into the empty classroom as I sat marking the last of my ancient Egypt essays.

"Uh hello to you to Mary Margaret," I threw my red pen down on the table and stretched.

"What the hell happened in that staffroom Emma?" She dropped her classwork onto one of the nearby tables, slammed her hands on top of it and glared at me.

"I accidentally splashed myself with some water from the tap,"

"Oh and suddenly your shirt came undone with the sheer impact of the water?"  
"Clearly,"

Mary Margaret rolled her eyes at me, "Ugh, I can't believe you Emma Swan. Regina was there, Regina! She could have had your backside fired for that,"

"Don't talk down to me like I'm another one of your students Ms Blanchard," I snapped, "I am a grown adult and I make my own mistakes,"

'Regina though!"

"Regina…Regina she," I was not going to lie. I never really lied much unless it was a little white one to stop a shit storm of hurt coming somebody's way, but Mary Margaret needed to know the truth, "Regina, she liked it okay?"

Mary Margaret looked taken back, "what?"

"Regina liked it. She thought it was funny and sexy and good God, Mary, she is perfect,"

"I don't care if you think the sun shines out of Regina's arse; we work in a school for crying out loud,"

"I had a backup plan alright? Anyway, I had a spare shirt in my car," _No, no I didn't_.

"And what was this ingenious, _brilliant_ plan of yours Emma? Get her into her office to get changed and have sex with her on her desk?"

"Actually yes,"

Mary Margaret's blue eyes widened, "no, you can't be serious?"

"I am serious and I did just that, thank you very much Ms nosy Blanchard," I retorted as I stacked my tiny pile of work up and collected it against my chest, "now, do you need any more time to fire shitty judgemental remarks at me or am I free to leave?"

Mary Margaret stared at me. I fidgeted under her glare as she sighed, "look, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I've had a long day and I didn't mean to take it out on you,"

I stayed quiet. I was not going to accept her apology so easily.

"To be honest, I would have done the same thing if I was you and Regina was David," Mary Margaret shrugged half-heartedly and a small smile graced her lips. I couldn't help myself,

"What _you_, a _slut_ for David?"

"Hey, underneath this school teacher persona, a feisty man eater lurks," she giggled as she winked.

"Good grief Ms Blanchard," I rolled my eyes and couldn't help but laugh. The tension dissipated immediately.

"I shouldn't judge you on what tickles your fancy Emma. It's just that…she's totally nuts. She will chew you up and spit you out before you could even say the word 'corn chip'"

"…Corn chip?"

"I'm hungry,"

"Right,"

Mary Margaret shook her head as she smirked. She laid a booklet on each of the tables,

"Nice shirt by the way; you suit Regina's clothes,"

* * *

So I now had Henry, Kathryn, David, Ruby and now Mary Margaret on my side for this whole Regina relationship thing. I didn't care for much for anyone else. Leroy was already for it and Astrid would probably just turn a blind eye. I didn't know much of the other staff but I'm sure they'd be slightly appreciative of the fact that I'd taken Regina's attention away from throwing them snide remarks and mildly degrading comments.

I had one last shitty class before this extraordinarily bizarre but fabulous day was over; History. This class was terrible when it came to my own private life. It was like no matter how many detentions I dished out or how many kids I kicked out of the room, they still asked. If I've had other students who I'd never met before comment on the fact my shirt looked exactly like one that Regina owned, this class would slaughter me and string me up for the crows to pick at. I had to do some serious mental preparation as I strode up to the whispering line of petty students.

"Afternoon class," my boots clipped loudly on the linoleum and my long necklace swung widely. How was I going to take the class today? Was I going to be sarcastic and snappy? Or cool, calm and collected?

"Nice shirt Miss,"

I beamed at a tall boy at the end of the line, "thanks Tyson, its Ms Mills". The words had fallen out of my mouth before I time to even think them out or even stick a filter on them. The class mumbled loudly as I unlocked the door, "any more questions kids?"

"Yeah, are you banging her?"

"Nope,"

"Then why do you have a hickey on your neck that wasn't there this morning?"

My hand shot up to my neck and the class sniggered, "I'm banging the Business teacher, you happy?"

"Nope because the Business teacher is a dude and you've got Ms Mill's red lipstick on your earlobe,"

Fucking fuck, hell this was not happening.

"In," I growled and I pointed into the empty classroom. Fucking hell I was going to murder Regina.

* * *

Six minutes left. That's all I had until the hell hole of a class finished and I was free for two days. Six minutes left until I could flee the school grounds and throw myself on to my bed and finish myself off where Regina left me so desperately in her office. But also six minutes left until I wouldn't see her again for two days. I wasn't sure if I could bare it. I mean, my skin felt awkward without Regina glaring at it or touching it or kissing it or heaven forbid, tonguing it. I had to suppress a shiver.

"Miss, can we go?"

The clock said 2:56pm. I poked my head out the classroom door and scanned the empty halls.

"Might as well," the class had already stood up by the time I'd finished my sentence,

"Cheers Miss! Have a good weekend, yeah?"

"Not so fast Mr Hampton," Regina chirped. Here we go. Cheers Regina you hot piece of annoying ass. She blocked the door with her arms crossed.

"Well Ms Swan, I see that you're letting the class go a few more minutes earlier than legally allowed,"

"Come on Ms Mills! We promise we won't get hit by a truck or anything," a kid whined.

"It's Friday Miss!"

"Yes thank you for that information Ms Palmer; I am not an imbecile,"

Regina sassed the absolute crap out of my class and they desperately looked at me for guidance. They've been treating me like shit so I guess they deserved whatever Regina dished up. I shrugged at one particular disheartened looking boy,

"Ms Mills runs the show kid, don't think I'll be standing up for you lot after how you've been treating me these last couple of weeks,"

Regina lifted a curious eyebrow as the class refused eye contact with her, "and how have Ms Blanchard's little angels been treating you lately Ms Swan?"

"I have never met a nosier bunch of students in all my life," I raised my chin slightly and stood over beside Regina. They cowered under our glare. I kind of felt good about it.

"We were just playing Miss," one girl piped up,

"How is demanding a whole lot of intimate details about my private life even playing, Sarah?"

The girl ducked her head in embarrassment.

"That is outrageous. How dare you ask such questions to Ms Swan? She is here in her free time to teach you lot History and she willingly marks your work and your essays so that you can pass school and yet you do this?" Regina put her hands on her hips, "I am ashamed and you deserved to be punished,"

There was a collective gulp from the class. I couldn't let this happen. They were kids, bloody annoying, but kids nonetheless. I stepped forward,

"No Regina, its fine". Regina's eyes turned to slits,

"This is my school and I punish where I see fit,"

"Don't, though. Please, they're just kids. Just an apology will suffice," I put a soothing hand on her shoulder and Regina's eyes zeroed in on it. I squeezed softly. Her jaw twitched.

"Fine, you lot should be grateful that you have such a kind hearted teacher. As Ms Swan as stated, all she wants is an apology,"

The class was quiet.  
"Apologise. Now,"

"Sorry Ms Swan," they groaned in unison. I smiled weakly at the students who collected their belongings as they disappeared out the room.

* * *

Regina sighed as massaged her temples, "I'm so sorry about that Emma,"

"No, no it's fine. Seriously," I grinned at her as I fixed my up my shirt. Regina looked me up and down and licked her lips,

"I daresay, I should have you wear my clothes more often,"

"Hmm, but that's kind of the reason for the nosy kids,"

"Really, how,"

"They recognised the shirt from you,"

"Ah," Regina smiled, "and here I'm thinking I've outsmarted a bunch of teenagers,"

"They're perceptive little shits,"

"Yes thank you for that Ms Swan,"

"No worries Ms Mills," I wiggled my eyebrows at her as I bent down to lock the classroom door once we left it, "Regina?"  
"Mm,"

"Stop staring at my arse,"

"You don't even know that I was staring at it,"

"I have a perky butt, who could resist it?"

Regina scoffed and rolled her eyes as I stood up. I nudged her in the arm and we headed down the main hallway. Behind us, other students were being let out; they surged around us like a tidal wave, exploding out in the quiet halls. There were a dozen goodbyes thrown our way as we smiled and laughed at certain students.

* * *

The staffroom was packed as we went in. We had to weave in and out between staff.

"Hey Swan! Over here," Ruby sang. I shot Regina a small smile and she returned it as I headed over to Ruby while she turned to Kathryn.

"I see that you've entered with the old faithful Ms Mills,"

"Dude, I have so much to tell you," I sat down quickly and grabbed Ruby's arm tightly.

"Sheesh, what the hell could have happened in the like four hours since I saw you last?"

I raised my eyebrows up suggestively while dipping my head. She gasped, "No!"

"Yes!"

"What? How? When? Details Swan, now," Ruby's eyes were ablaze.

"On her desk today in our spares,"

"Dude," she gasped again as her eyes glazed over, "like bang-bang or?"

"We attempted it but then classic me ruined it,"  
"Why? How, Emma!" Ruby whined,

"I told her she was perfect and she didn't believe me and then I snapped at her,"  
"Dude,"

"I know,"

"She's crazy,"  
"Crazy hot, Ruby. Then I think now we're in some kind of relationship now,"

"This morning you were avoiding her, and now you're in a relationship with her. What gives?"

"I don't know man, but she's said she wants to come over sometime for dinner and then…you know,"

"Fuck,"

"Yeah,"

"No I mean, fuck man that's crazy. But like, in a good way,"

"I know, but so now what?"

"Dinner,"

"Yeah but when and where?"

"This Saturday, your house,"

My blood went ice cold. Oh no.

"What? No, don't you think that's a bit, you know, sudden?"

"Not if Mills is up for it, it's not,"

"Um, I have a kid,"

"You are literally trying to poke holes in this plan,"

"No, I'm not, trust me. Regina said we won't do it until I've fed her spaghetti and Henry is out the house,"

"Well, what if you send Henry out with Tom to the movies or something?"

"Do you mean Tom Lucas his best friend? Yeah but, that's not going to be long enough,"

"Sheesh woman, how long are you planning to bang this woman?"

"As long as humanly possible Ruby, as long as humanly possible,"

Ruby just stared at me.

"What?"

"Put two and two together Emma"

"It's four, why?"

"Shit you're thick sometimes. Tom Lucas, Ruby Lucas?"

"Oh…" a light bulb went off inside my brain, "Oh!"

"He's my baby brother and he stays at mine sometimes. Look, I'll pick Henry up from yours, I'll drop them to the movies, pick them up and they can crash at mine for the night, deal?"

"Ruby you are a lifesaver, holy shit. How do I repay you?"

"By banging the absolute _fuck_ out of Regina,"

* * *

By 4pm, the room had cleared out; Ruby, Regina and I were the last, not if you counted Kathryn ducking out. Ruby had spent a good thirty minutes telling me about the substitute Maths class she'd just taken and how this one kid in her Art class had somehow managed to get paint on the ceiling.

"Like, did she throw the paintbrush at the ceiling or some shit? Because I don't know man; plus I didn't even hear it hit the roof or the desk."

I felt a presence behind me and two soft hands clamped down on either side of my shoulders. Regina.

"I'm sorry Ms Lucas, do you mind if I borrow Emma dear for a few moments?"

"Yeah sure, go nuts. I was about to head home anyway," Ruby picked up her handbag and gave me a glare that only meant I had to tell her absolutely everything on Sunday morning when I picked Henry up from her house.

"See you Sunday Swan. See you Regina" she waved as she left the room, her eyes flicking between Regina and I.

"What's happening Sunday dear?" Regina sat down in Ruby's seat and ran her hands up and down my thighs.

"Oh um," Regina's finger brushed over the tough piece of denim in between my legs where the zipper sat, "Hen-Henry is going to uh, Ruby's house Saturday night because he's best friend's with Ruby's little brother, Tom,"

"Ah. So, you will be alone then, Ms Swan?"

"Suppose so,"

"So, would you like company…Ms Swan?"  
"If you stop calling me Ms Swan, maybe,"

"Of course, Ms Swan,"

"Regina," I huffed. But she smiled and kissed me on the side of the mouth,

"Sorry dear, you're just ever so fun to rile up,"

"Okay. So Regina, I will be alone tomorrow night, would you like to come over for spaghetti and possibly a cheesy movie if you're up for it?"  
"Is this idea of a date?"

I cringed. Was I supposed to take Regina out to a fancy place? Is that what she was expecting from me? I mean, she _was_ a high calibre woman.

"Emma, calm; I was joking. I would love to come over and eat spaghetti with you and watch a crappy movie with you on Saturday,"

"Hey I said cheesy, not crappy,"

Regina rolled her eyes, "whatever. Count me in dear,"  
"So, um my place at like, six-thirty?"

Regina hummed, "perfect," As she bopped her finger on my nose. Well that was cute as hell.

"You can watch me cook dinner," I mumbled. Oh God, probably the wrong bloody thing to say. What if she doesn't want to watch me make dinner and just wants to fuck?

"I'd love to watch you cook dinner,"

Oh thank God.  
"I wear…I can wear my cute little frilly apron and…"

"Emma,"

"My frog oven mittens while I take the spaghetti off the boil,"  
"Emma,"

"And oh shit, what wine will I take out? Will you even like my wine? Wait, Regina, do you even drink wine? Wait, do I even have any wine,"

"Emma!"

"Wine doesn't sound like a word anymore,"  
"Dear you are rambling,"  
"I'm nervous," I wrung my hands together in my lap.

"Evidently, but it's adorable,"

She called me adorable. Regina fucking Mills called me adorable and it wasn't half-assed or fake or any of that.

"Oh, okay; that's good then," I smiled weakly. Regina put her hand on my elbow and lifted me out of my chair.

"School shuts at 4:30; we don't want to be locked in here all weekend do we dear?"

I nodded as she guided us towards the car park. It was Friday afternoon and I was not surprised the least when our cars were the last; her super clean, super shiny Mercedes parked with perfection at one end and my old beetle that looked like it had survived the wildest of dust storms, parked on the sidewalk just outside the school gates.

"Not enough spaces in here then Ms Swan?" Regina smirked at my shoddy parking skills as I pulled a twig from the back windscreen wiper.

"Eh, it's Friday. I don't start til late," I snapped the wood and chucked it onto the road.

"I'll remember that for next time, because so do I,"

"Aw, cute breakfast date then Regina?"

"It's like you read my mind," she smiled as she leaned into me; pressing her lips to my forehead.

"…Eggs Benedict?" I chirped as Regina ran her arms up and down my back. She snorted,

"Pancakes all the way dear,"

I giggled, "oh and you call me the child?"  
"It's a guilty pleasure of mine. Top it all off with some proper Canadian maple syrup, a rash of bacon and a bit of butter, mm,"

"You and my son will be best of buddies. And anyway, how the hell are you so thin?"

"Gym dear…among other things," she winked as she pressed another kiss to my jawline, "I must go, my car is due for a service at 5. See you tomorrow night then…Emma,"

"Yeah, see you then,"

* * *

a/n: SWEN BE AH-ROLLIN'  
was that cute or was that cute? fuck, seriously, can a young late teens-early twenties Lana Parrilla come and date me? please?


	14. Chapter 14

a/n: the amount of love i am receiving for this fic is mind blowing. you're all fabulous, seriously.  
now it's date time for our leading ladies, BUT it runs across three chapters (sadly, one of these chapters is NOT the whipped cream and rope i had dangled deliciously in front of you in the previous chapter, but fear not readers, it shall come... no pun intended ;) )  
kinda **mild sexy times** so set the hose on a light dribble for the time being...  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

Henry's first assumption was that the rental man was due because the extremities I was doing to make sure the house was in tip top shape. I had him out the front mowing the small patch of green grass and picking out weeds from in between the pavestones. The only reason he wasn't complaining is because I had promised him a tonne of cash and he got to spend the night not only with his best friend Tom, but also the babe of a teacher, Ms Ruby Lucas. By the way he's eyes sparkled as he ripped apart my pathetic flower bed, he probably wondered what Ruby looked like outside of class and possibly in pyjamas. But I had texted Ruby stating she was to stay fully and properly clothed until the boys had gone to bed.

To keep things even simpler I did actually tell Henry that the rental man was coming; which kind of made it easier in persuading him to leave for the night. I was in no state to tell him I was attempting to impress the Principal of his school. No way in hell. I glanced around the shiny house, proud with myself and Henry. But it wasn't that I kept my house in a constant state of pigsty, but in contrast to Regina's flawlessly kept office, it was so totally a pigsty.

I had successfully hoovered and mopped the entire house. I don't know why I was going so bat shit crazy with it but this was the first time she was actually seeing my house. The television screen had been wiped down and so had the kitchen counter, dinner table and any sort of surface that Regina could possibly lay her hands on.

"Okay, I've cleaned the bathroom, washed the car, done the front garden, the back garden…anything else?" Henry padded in and dabbed the sheen of sweat on his flushed forehead.

"Nope but thank you so much Henry, you have no idea," I pressed a kiss to my sweaty son's head and shooed him off to the bathroom to shower and clean himself up.

"Don't sweat it Ma," He slammed the door shut. I still needed to teach him how to shut the bloody door.

* * *

"Knock, knock sunshine,"

Shit, what time was it? I looked up at the clock and felt my stomach fall out down to my feet; 5pm.

"Come in Ruby, mind the floor, it might be a bit wet," I called out from the kitchen. The front door bounced off its frame a couple times before relaxing. Ruby's bright and happy face appeared beside my fruit bowl,  
"Sup Swan,"

"Hey," another face appeared beside hers; a younger, male version of her,  
"Hi Ms Swan,"  
"Hey Tom, you guys don't mind me looking all dreadful," I smiled as I passed them two glasses of tap water, "Henry's just in the shower now, he shouldn't be long,"

"Cool," Tom's eyes roamed around the house, clearly checking out his Sports teacher's hectic bachelorette pad.

"Jesus Emma, I didn't realise you were capable of this level of cleanliness," she ran a finger across my countertop and examined the microscopic dust particles.

"I'm full of surprises," I smirked as I downed the last of my water. The bathroom door swung open and Henry waltzed out dressed in his usual attire of jeans, converse and some sort of retro-styled comic-printed shirt.

"Hello darling," Ruby squeaked. Ruby is killing my son, I just know it.

"Oh, hey Ms Lucas, is Tom here?"

"You can call me Ruby on weekends Henry; I'm not your Art teacher then,"

"Okay then Ms Lucas…I mean, sorry…Ruby," Henry scrunched up his face at the sound of it.

"No worries, and yeah he's just popped out the front for a sec,"  
Henry whizzed past and pushed open the front door, calling out to Tom who had somehow located one of Henry's soccer balls in the thick bush.

"How old are you if Tom's only thirteen?"

Ruby blew a massive bubble with her pink chewing gum, "I'm twenty eight,"  
I groaned, "great, I feel like an old fart,"  
"That's because you are Ms Solitaire," she eyed my computer screen.

"Hey, I'm thirty-three okay? I'm allowed to play that shit,"  
"Whatever, it's you who said they were an old fart,"

I glared at the younger woman.

"Here's a question; how old is Regina? Oh God, what if she's like fifty with some kick ass plastic surgery?"  
"Calm down Ruby, she's thirty five,"

"So old," Ruby rolled her eyes, "you two are such old farts,"

"Dude, you totally made out with her last year; she's seven years your senior man,"  
"So what I like cougars, deal with it," Ruby shrugged her shoulders as Henry and Tom raced back inside.

"You kids ready to roll or what?" I gave Henry the money I promised him from my purse and kissed him,

"Ew Mum, no," He glanced nervously up to Ruby who smiled, "there are ladies here,"  
"And this lady doesn't mind. Now, let's roll amigos," She placed a hand on Henry's shoulder and directed the two boys out.

"And Emma," Ruby called through the mesh of the flyscreen door as Henry and Tom jumped into the back of her red convertible,

"What?"

"Bang the crap out of Regina. I am expecting juicy details tomorrow when you pick up your love-struck son,"  
"Yes _thank you_ Ruby, goodnight,"

* * *

No. I was not wearing _that_…or _that_, or heaven forbid, _this_.

I chucked the dress back onto my pristinely made, freshly re-sheeted king bed. It was obvious I had nothing left in this damn dresser than was even close to portraying a cool, calm and collected Emma Swan, weekend edition. Was Regina expecting me in just usual attire or something else? Hell, what was she going to wear? There was no doubt in my mind that she was going to outshine me on every level…well every level except for my underwear, that's for sure. I only pulled these purple lacy bad boys out when I knew I was definitely, without a doubt, getting laid. I even shaved my legs and everything.

I stared down at the array of dresses I had splayed out onto the bed and shoved a white maxi beach dress up over my head and wrestled it over my super extreme super excellent push up bra. I wrapped a long ass tanned leather thin belt twice around my middle and slung on a cropped denim vest thingy that I had somehow found hidden underneath my stack of shoes.

It just didn't look right. Something was missing. I spotted a metal hairclip. _Bingo_. Wrapping my hair up in a loose bun looking thing, I clipped the hairclip in and smiled at my glorious beach babe hairstyle with a cute as hell wispy fringe. I looked freaking cute as, totally Regina-worthy.

I stashed the rest of the dresses back into my wardrobe and practically skipped out to the kitchen. The clock above the front door ticked past 6:05p.m. Shit. Uneasiness pooled around the back of my thighs and no matter how much of this damn lukewarm cider I was downing, I couldn't get rid of it.

Regina was going to be here in twenty minutes. Regina. Not just any old Regina but Regina Mills, holy hell. I puffed out my cheeks and yanked open the fridge door. The wine was chilling, the vegetables were sitting all nice and squeaky clean, and the three cans of whipped cream sat hidden behind Henry's massive box of apple juice. Damn if they had eyes, I swear the cream would be throwing me dirty looks when I caressed them this afternoon, telling them all about where I would be using them on Regina's body.

* * *

I glared at the bottle in front of me; drops of condensation ran down the brown glass and pooled around it. I was using it to keep my mind off constantly checking the clock but clearly it wasn't working because I knew it was 6:19p.m. 11 minutes. Come on Regina.

There was a glint of sunlight outside on the main road and my breath caught in my throat. A black Mercedes pulled up and parked with only the precision that Regina Mills was capable of.  
Here we go.  
I ducked into the bathroom just as I heard Regina open her car door. Okay, my face looked okay. I mean my makeup was still very much in place and so was my hair and oh no was that a curry stain on my damn jacket? Shit.

There was a soft knock on my flyscreen door. Fucking fuck, this was happening. Shit, fuck. Oh no. I dipped my head over the basin and clenched the edges super tight. A dog was barking somewhere in the distance and I wanted to strangle it. This was Regina and just Regina. Not some kind of crazy lady, just your boss, just your boss Regina. I think I was going to be sick.

She knocked again, "Emma?"

_Fuck._  
I pushed down my fear and ambled out down to the tiled hallway, digging my toes hard into the flooring.

"Emma?" Regina knocked again.

"Sorry, I didn't hear you!" Yep, best lie I could possibly muster at this point. I flicked the lock and pulled open the stubborn door. The best way I could describe Regina's immaculate outfit was simply country club. It was like she was attending a Sunday lunch at the poshest country club in all of Maine. Her hair was a nice wavy bob and makeup was perfect as usual particularly the bright slash of red lipstick. She wore a silk neck scarf, a simple black tee shirt tucked into a knee length white pleated skirt and red flats with matching red handbag.

"Thank goodness because I thought for a second I had the wrong house," Regina pushed up her tortoise shelled bug-eyed sunglasses and frowned down at a yellow Post It note stuck to her thumb.

"Nope, couldn't miss this hideously red bricked bad boy for miles," I grinned as I stepped back to let Regina in.

"I must have driven past it a dozen times, checking the number but then realised that it would be fitting that you'd own the only red house in a main street of white bricked houses." I glowered at her as she kicked off her flats and walked in.  
"Wow, not even inside my house and you've managed to insult it. Cheers Regina," She smirked and stood up on her the tips of her toes to kiss me,

"No worries dear," I felt her smile against my mouth.

* * *

"Do you think it's wise to wear white when you're cooking spaghetti?"

"Probably not,"

I diced up the last of the red capsicum and threw them onto the sizzling pan.

"I suggest you get changed dear,"

I turned to Regina, who sat on the bar stool nursing a glass of red wine,

"Says the woman drinking red wine over her white skirt,"  
"Yes well I am not as clumsy as you, am I?" Regina raised her eyebrows as she drank heavily from the glass, her chocolate brown eyes never leaving mine.

"I guess I could cook naked, if you prefer,"

She choked on her wine. That got her attention. Regina wiped the edge of her mouth,

"Good God Emma, as tempting that sounds, I'm going to have to say no. Anyway, I don't want you burning yourself when you dare me to lick scolding sauce out of your belly button,"

Shit, I was not expecting that kid of reply. But nonetheless, Regina was so hot and sassy and fucking perfect.

"What a shame Regina, we could have had so much fun," I winked as I stirred the vegetables.

"Didn't your Mother ever tell you 'no dessert before dinner'?"

I faltered for a second. The wooden spoon fell from my fingers and landed onto the tiled floor. I know Regina meant it as a joke but it still felt like someone dragged a sharp knife up my spine.

"Shit," I grabbed a wet cloth and bent down, wiping away the sauce that had splashed up the cupboard doors. My hands trembled as I scrubbed perilously at a stain on the floor.

Regina's hands were suddenly on mine, folding over mine, pulling the ruined cloth from my grasp.

"Ms Swan, I've clearly insulted you, I'm so sorry," She smiled as my backside bumped into the glass door of my oven,

"No, no, it's fine. I just…uh," I picked up the spoon as Regina placed a soft hand on my cheek. She leaned in and brushed her lips over mine. I tumbled backwards at the contact and she fell with me, straddled awkwardly in my lap as my back rested against the oven.

"Hey," I muttered awkwardly as Regina bit her lip, her face centimetres from mine,

"Hey" she whispered. She pressed her indulgent lips to mine and I groaned, bucking my hips into her centre. Regina giggled into my mouth as she pulled away and peppered kisses over and around my jawline,

"Am I ever going to be allowed my wicked way with you?" I gasped as her tongue made contact with my neck, "or am I going to have force my way to it?"

"Oh Ms Swan, I do like the sound of the latter," she mumbled into my skin. Regina clearly was one kinky lady and I was totally, a hundred percent okay with that. Hell, I even encourage it.

I sniffed and I was hit with the smell of burning vegetable.

"Shit," I almost flung Regina off my legs. She yelped as I slid her petite frame off of my lower limbs and clambered up, grabbing blindingly at the pan. I lifted it off and sloshed the mushy mixture around the shallow pan. Where the fuck was the spoon? I glanced nervously around, hoping to salvage the very black and crispy vegetables that stuck to the bottom of the so called non-stick pan. Shit, it was on the floor. I couldn't serve Regina burnt vegetables from a dirty floor spoon.

I yanked a black plastic spatula from the ceramic container next to the cooker and scraped the vegetables off onto a little blue plate on the counter.

"Um, so Regina…I kind of, possibly, burnt the…" I peeked down to Regina and almost dropped the sizzling pan. She sat back on the heels of her feet and had her bent legs split wide open with her skirt trailing down in between them. Regina steadied herself with one hand on the tiled floor and she held the spoon to her lips with her other hand delicately. The tip of her tongue lavished the concave area of the spoon as her eyes were wide and hungry and oh so definitely on me. If that wasn't hot enough, a few strands of her perfectly kept hair had fallen over her left eye and a bit had stuck slightly to her lipstick.

"Hmm, what were you saying dear? I was too busy enjoying the pasta sauce,"

"I um," I swallowed thickly as the flat of her tongue covered the entire back of the spoon, "vegetables…burnt…"

"Oh no, how unfortunate," she purred,  
"yeah, really super unfortunate," I cleared my throat as she stood up, her knees clicking loudly. Regina had successfully cleaned the spoon entirely with just the tip of her tongue. It practically sparkled, you know if roughly made cheap kitchen spoons from the local supermarket could sparkle.

She passed it innocently back to me and I just stared at the utensil in my numb fingers.

"Does this mean no dinner Ms Swan?" Regina grazed the back of her hand against my cheek and pouted, "I was looking forward to your spaghetti. But no matter, I guess this means we can skip straight to dessert,"

If I could punch any organ inside my body right now, it would have been my stomach because right at that moment, it gurgled. Regina snorted and rolled her eyes as I patted the complaining body part,

"I'm bit of a mood killer aren't I?"

"Evidently," she took a step back and sighed, "I guess we can't do a few hours of rigorous exercise while you're lower intestine sounds like it's got a creature crawling through it,"

Regina rifled through my fridge and freezer until she came across a box of pasta sheets and enough ingredients to make a basic cheese sauce.

"May I?" she motioned towards the now cold vegetables as I took a seat on a bar stool.

"Go ahead, salvage what you can," Regina smiled at me as she pulled out a chopping board and dumped the burnt goodness onto it; scrutinising each piece before either discarding it or cutting off the over roasted skin and throwing it into the pasta sauce that simmered quietly on the back hotplate.

* * *

Somehow Regina had whipped up something that looked along the lines of lasagne. I took the time to dump the cooked yellow spaghetti strands into an airtight container and place it into my fridge. No doubt Henry would find it and add some tomato sauce or some other disastrous condiment to it and title it as an afternoon snack of sorts. Regina glided through the kitchen like she knew it like the back of her hand. Not that it matter, I mean, I'd love her to be in here cooking for me whatever and whenever her heart desired.

"You should still get changed dear," Regina hummed as she donned my frilly slightly stained apron and bright green frog oven mitts. She pulled slid the small glass dish filled with lasagne into the oven. Regina looked bloody adorable and so familiar dressed in my stupid apron and childish oven mitts.

"Why?"

"Because we still have to eat it and no doubt you will spill some onto yourself,"

"Excuse me, I am not clumsy," I put my hands onto my hips with such force, I knocked over my cup of water; my plastic cup bounced across the countertop and rolled away underneath the table as cold water pooled. Regina simply lifted a single eyebrow at me as I chucked a tea towel on the puddle of water.

"Please, _please_ get changed," Regina pleaded. I huffed as I left the solo cook to navigate my kitchen. I figured that I had no need to impress Regina anymore considering her eyes had widened considerably when she saw the dark lace material strain against the thin beach dress I slipped on for this evening. She knew what was hiding beneath this dress.

I ripped open my chest of drawers and yanked out a pair of denim shorts and a grey singlet thing that made my boobs look great.

* * *

It was obvious that Regina hadn't sensed my return. I'm not too sure she's still oblivious considering I slammed my door back and tripped on an uneven tile, swearing. Regina's back was to me as she hummed and swayed her hips slightly to some kind of soft jazz number that played out on the small radio propped up on my open window. I wrapped my arms around her waist and her breath hitched,

"I should let you cook for me more often Ms Mills," I pressed a quick kiss to the back of her neck as I fiddled with the front knot of the apron.

"Funny how tonight's circumstances changed. I thought you were supposed to be cooking me dinner, not the other way around Ms Swan," She sighed and leaned her neck back, giving me total access to the pale skin. I didn't hesitate as my fingers quickly undid the tight knot. I latched my hungry lips to her bare throat. She hummed happily as my tongue softly stroked the flesh just behind her ear. Unwrapped the apron, I released Regina from my grasp as she groaned.

"Damn it Emma," She sucked a breath in through clenched teeth as I wrapped the apron around my own middle, "you are going to be the death of me,"

I grinned as I pulled the steaming pasta based meal from the oven with a tea towel; cooked to perfection.

"Not if you kill me first with this possibly poisoned dinner, aye Regina?" I winked at her as I sliced two squares out of the lasagne and slopped them onto two plates. I had busied myself before with making a poor excuse of a salad, so I made a small neat pile of said salad on each of our dishes.

"Please Ms Swan, if I was going to kill you I would have slipped poison into the stupid jar of peanut butter you drag around with you at work," She muttered diplomatically as she raised her chin.

"Note to self, buy a new jar of peanut butter," I licked the cheese from the flat of the blade, "and make it Regina-proof,"

"Oh and how does one exactly make something, 'Regina-proof'?" she made little air quotations as I pushed the plate towards her as she sat down on one of the three bar stools I had.

"Hmm," I stared at her, stroking my chin mockingly as she took an elegant bite of salad, "you seem like the type of gal who couldn't undo a bra in one go so I'd stick one of those five clasped bad boys on the jar,"

"Oh Emma, how very wrong you are indeed," Regina snaked her arm up beneath her designer shirt and I heard a small click. Her chest gave way slightly as she put her hand back up the front of her shirt. I had to admit, seeing Regina grope her own boobs in front of me was extremely hot and made me feel like someone had poured hot water down the front of my trousers. With one quick flick of her finger, Regina flung her red bra into my lap. Holy shit, what the fuck just happened? I stared down at the warm piece of lingerie that sat temptingly in between my legs.

"Regina…" I gawked, my bottom jaw almost touching the counter as I turned to her. Once again, she looked at me innocently as she wrapped her pink tongue around an exceptionally cheesy piece of cheese as her very noticeably perky nipples pressed against the white fabric of her top. Regina Mills was going to fucking kill me.

"Yes dear?"

"I…I…"  
"You retract that statement then?"

I laughed nervously as I thumbed the see through lace bra she'd thrown at me, "Ah, yeah,"  
"Good. Do not doubt my skills in undressing myself ever again Ms Swan," Regina continued to eat her dinner like nothing completely and utterly mind blowing had just happened.

"Holy shit," I whispered as turned back to my meal.

* * *

a/n: I'M IN LOVE WITH MY OWN REGINA.  
next chapter is sexy chapter, weee weee! ;)


	15. Chapter 15

a/n: **WARNING kinda cute fluff but mega SMUT SMUT SMUTTEROONIE**  
I figured I'd play around with the usual power play positions between these two so...  
enjoy ;)  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

I was half expecting Regina to slam me up against a wall after dinner and fuck me right then and there, but apparently not. She took our plates, filled my sink with hot soapy water and proceeded to wash up. I simply watched her, drinking from her glass of wine.

"Do you not own two wine glasses? Or must you continue to drink from mine,"

"Oh, sorry," I licked a drop of red wine from my chin and put her cup down on the counter, "it's habit from Henry; we're constantly drinking from each other's drinks". She scrunched her nose up as she slotted a plate into the drying rack; her fingernails picking at a piece of pasta that she'd clearly not scrubbed off hard enough. I laughed at her expression; it was so childish,  
"Regina, I don't have cooties,"

"If you say so dear,"

"Regina, I swear, no cooties,"

She just smirked at the bubbly water as she washed out my Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles coffee cup from this morning.

"Really Ms Swan," Regina motioned to the sopping wet coffee cup in her hand, "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?"

"Henry's,"

She eyed me suspiciously, "_you sure?_"

"I think I know when I buy my son novelty mugs Regina, sheesh," I rolled my eyes. Hell yeah that mug was mine but I was not going to admit that to Regina. She shrugged her shoulders and rested it awkwardly up against the drying pan.

"I have a Power Puff Girls cup," she admitted, groping around in the dirty water for loose silverware,

"Who's your favourite?" I asked. I wasn't going to judge her on that; hell, that was adorable and I would give my left arm to see her have it steaming away on her desk at school.

"Blossom,"

"I would have taken you to be a Buttercup kind of lady,"  
"Once again, you assume wrong Ms Swan," her eyes twinkled as she rubbed several forks with the washcloth, "but let me guess, Bubbles for you?"

"Damn," I muttered, taking another swig at Regina's wine. She was good, and damn it she was right. 'Bubbles' was my favourite. Regina had the same smug smile plastered on her face every time she'd catch me staring at her arse during school hours and in a crowded hallway.  
"Okay, fine. You win, Michelangelo," I growled,

"What?" Regina's eyebrows knitted together in confusion,

"Michelangelo was my favourite Ninja Turtle,"

Regina glanced down at the cup and raised a single eyebrow, "oh," she cleared her throat and pulled the plug from the drain, "mine was Donatello,"

"Knew it," I laughed as Regina finished whatever I had left in her wine glass, "totally a turtle fan".

* * *

"Now, I'm not going to lie, my son and I are quite the movie buffs, so what will it be, Ms Mills?" Regina perched herself on my sofa as I swung open the door to my mega stash of DVDs and Blue Rays. She raised her eyebrows up as she slid off the couch and kneeled beside me, her brown eyes flicking over the titles,  
"Not in alphabetical order? Well, that does not surprise me the slightest," Regina ran her finger over the spines, clucking her tongue.

"What might interest you is that its colour coordinated," I stated proudly as Regina did a double take at the spectrum of colours that was my DVD collection.

"I'm impressed,"

She bloody better be. I took my sweet ass time doing it one evening instead of flicking myself off to the image of her eating me out in the shower. But it was kind of weird knowing that the mind numbing reason that this all colour coding happened, was now admiring my handiwork. I coughed.

"Cheers, I uh, am going to get some more wine, did you want some?"

Regina blinded me with a dazzling smile in approval and I couldn't help but gasp. She truly was perfect and good grief, I'd spent my entire life trying to prove it to her if she'd let me. Quickly, get out. _Get out_. I clambered to my weak legs and practically sprinted out the lounge room.

I pulled the frosty bottle out of the fridge and yanked the stopper out.

"You better have picked a movie by the time I come back Regina," I tipped the bottle back feverishly and almost choked as the red liquid gushed down my throat. I needed this but hell, I definitely needed something stronger.

"Of course dear," Regina purred. Wiping my mouth, I searched my cupboards for a clean wine glass and more importantly, more alcohol. Bingo; my best friend and arch nemesis, whiskey. I groaned in anticipation as I spun the lid off and took a deep breath of its sickly aroma. There was neither time nor need for a shot glasses so I, as per usual, I poured it straight into my mouth.

"Oh dear, don't think you'll be hogging that to yourself all night Emma,"

Regina leaned against the opposite side of the countertop, her smirking mouth cupped by her dainty fingers and her breasts pressed heavily against the white material of her shirt. I'd kiss that bloody smug look off her face if I wasn't squatting on the floor and had a bottle of expensive alcohol to my lips.

"If I'd known you had something stronger, I'd asked for it when I came through your front door,"

"I wasn't actually planning on bringing out tonight, but yeah,"

Regina straightened herself and her bangles hit the countertop loudly as she rested her hands out in front of her, "And why are you drinking it now?"

I shrugged and took another swig, "eh, liquid courage,"

Regina looked shocked, "liquid courage? Are you nervous Ms Swan?"

She's literally the stupidest smart person I have ever encountered. No, of course I wouldn't be nervous, it's not like I have the biggest babe ever in my kitchen wanting to fuck the absolute crap out of me. Oh wait, I do.

"You're joking right?" I smirked and winced as the next gulp of whiskey was incredibly stronger than the last. I must almost be out.

"No," She had that look of a confused puppy. A banging hot puppy, if that was humanly possible.

"Christ Regina, seriously,"

"Yes! I seriously do not understand why you require liquid courage,"  
"Because of _you_,"  
"_Me_?"

Yep, definitely the stupidest smart woman I have ever laid eyes on.

"Yes, you Regina; I'm nervous because I'm scared I'm going to mess tonight up,"

"Oh, I…" A light blush crept up her neck, "please don't be worried. It's only me,"

"Exactly my point, it's _you_. Not anyone else, it's _you_. I want you so bad and I'm scared I'm going to screw this up,"  
Regina chewed her bottom lip as she stepped around into the kitchen, towering over me, "And what exactly is 'this'?"

I sighed and sipped again, "I want more than sex from you Regina… I mean, sex would be nice, but you know, I'd like more".

"Sex with me is better than nice Ms Swan," Regina winked,

"I've heard it's…adequate," I joked, placing the bottle into Regina's outstretched hand,

"So, so much more adequate," She breathed as she sniffed the bottle. Her eyes drooped, "may I finish the bottle?"

"Go nuts,"

And in that moment, I would pay a small fee to be that bottle of whiskey. She tilted her head back, pressed the lip of the bottle to her mouth and completely downed the lot. Regina raised the bottle up and flicked her tongue out to catch the last drops dripping from the neck of the whiskey. I couldn't move. I couldn't even breathe when her pinkie finger rimmed the top of the bottle and her long tongue slowly and lavishly licked her finger clean.

My throat was thick, "shame you drank it all, I could've done something like that to impress you,"

What the hell was that? That was the worst pick up line thing that I had ever produced, ever. I knew I was incapable of doing something so sexual to a bottle of whiskey.

"There's still some left in my mouth if you'd like to taste it,"

If my underpants weren't already soaking wet from the moment of Regina's arrival, than they undeniably were now. I think Regina was quite surprised at the speed I stood up and threw myself at her. But, bloody hell, she was quicker. She squished her forefinger to my eager lips and shushed my complaining. Regina opened her mouth slightly and I could that her tongue glistened goldenly from the whiskey. She gripped my chin with other finger and thumb and yanked my jaw down.

"I want to taste it," I whimpered. Regina Mills had me wrapped around her little finger and boy, didn't she know it.

"Don't you worry dear, you will but you have to follow one simple rule, okay?"  
"Okay,"

"You mustn't touch me for two hours,"

"What?"

I did not have the sheer will power to follow through on that demand. I needed to touch her; I had to touch her, everywhere and anywhere.

"If you comply, your prize will be more than satisfactory. I'm sure you can gather what kind of prize you are in for dear,"

Maybe I could comply…maybe.

"I am typical blonde, Regina," I whispered, "Please; enlighten me, just a little bit, won't you?"

Her eyes gleamed as she pressed her lower body into mine, gyrating softly. She backed me up against the cooker and grinded herself hard into me. Holy shit, holy shit, she was so hot. Regina lifted her leg up, her skirt falling away slightly from her thigh.

"Open your mouth Ms Swan, but if you touch me, I'll stop immediately,"  
I opened my mouth, nervously at first but she started licking her lips, it practically fell wide open. Her pink tongue snaked out and flicked the side of my open mouth. She ran it over my top lip and down over my bottom. Self-control, self-control was what I needed right now. Regina grabbed my hand as she continued to rock against me, and guided it down her smooth and toned leg until the tips of my fingers brushed against her pantie-clad core. I felt silk. Or was it lace? Or hell, was it both? Good grief. I couldn't think straight while she did this.

Regina leaned in closer until her entire tongue was in between my lips. I felt her massage my own tongue with hers, then stroke the walls of my mouth, and then finally, pushed her tongue down and ran it over my teeth. Fucking hell it was so hot. Regina and whiskey tasted like a match made in heaven. There was no way I couldn't go two hours without touching her. I had to touch her. I needed to. She had a firm grip on my hand as she rubbed it up against her centre. Wait, Regina was literally using me to fuck herself against. Hot, hot, hot but I'm still sort of angry I couldn't join in; time to change that.

I curled my fingers and Regina gasped at the contact. I hadn't gone inside her but simply held her sensitive nub through the silk with my knuckles, massaging it. But as quickly as she'd initiated the entire thing, she stopped it. I almost cried when she pulled herself off of me.

"Why…?"

"No touchy Ms Swan. By the way you're going, I'll have you begging by the time the two hours are up," she hissed,

"You've got me begging now,"

"Then this is going to be a long two hours for you isn't it?" she smirked as she sauntered off to the lounge room. Regina was going to definitely kill me.

* * *

Regina had picked that damn swan ballet movie with Natalie Portman in it. I couldn't, for the life of me, remember why I even bought it; maybe it was on sale, or maybe I had bought it in my 'Natalie Portman' phase. I don't know. Regina admitted as I stuck the DVD in, that she too, found Natalie quite pleasing to the eye and that's why she picked it. I completely forgot about the whole masturbation scene until about ten minutes before when Regina was shuffling uncomfortably and kneaded the skin of my knee like her life depended on it. She moaned before the scene even started and her hand instantly when to the hem of my jean shorts. Regina's eyes were dark as her fingers unbutton the top and slowly pulled down the zipper,

"Regina, why…" and then that, um, certain scene began.

Her eyes didn't leave mine as Natalie did her stuff on screen. Regina's fingers dipped lower and lower until they grazed my centre.

"This scene is my favourite," her eyes flicked lazily back to the television screen, "it makes me feel, all riled up," Regina took a deep breath as she pressed her fingers into my core through my underwear, "…hot and bothered". I couldn't think, well, I didn't really need to think. I just needed her to press harder but damn it, she wasn't. I bucked but she instantly yanked her hand away.

"Come on Regina, please," I begged. She smirked at me as her eyes never left the screen. I sighed, knowing that I had clearly lost this war, until Regina hooked her leg over mine and tugged. I flipped and landed awkwardly into her lap.

"Oh Ms Swan, I have almost no patience myself and it was quite stupid for me to suggest that you could even wait two hours," Regina's hands where on my stomach and she split her legs; I fell slightly and our cores crashed together. I yelped as she cupped my ass and pulled me back and forth against her lap. I could feel the heat from her centre as Regina latched her mouth onto my neck. Yes, holy hell yes. It was about time I was getting laid. She clawed at my shirt, ripped it clean off my body and pressed her tongue to my nipple through the purple material of my bra.

"Take this delicious scrap of lace off your body so I can ravish you properly," Regina growled. I was never the submissive type when it came to my sexual encounters but, damn, Regina could send me to hell and back and I'd comply. I wasted no time in removing the offensive material and pouted when she took it from me and slammed into onto the tiled floor,

"Don't you like it?" Regina peppered kisses down my neck and licked my clavicle,

"I do dear but it looks better on the floor,"

"Maybe another day I can parade around in it for you," I gushed as I let my head loll backwards, my long blonde hair tickling the small of my back.

"I'd like that dear, surprise me one day at work won't you?"

"Mm," that's all I could muster at this point as Regina latched her hot mouth onto my breast. Holy hell the woman had a mouth of magic. I leaned back further, feeling my bare abdomen brush the slightly rough material of her shirt. Regina's arm was tight around my waist as her other one made quick work of sticking itself back down the front of my trousers. Mouth of magic, fingers of magic, bloody hell, Regina Mills was pure magic.

"And do you know what else would look good on the floor?" She hummed as she tugged my jean shorts over the curve of my arse,

"My trousers," I quickly yanked them off and threw them down on top of my bra. It suddenly struck me that Regina was still completely dressed.

"Regina, take your shirt off," I leaned down and kissed her heatedly.

"No," Her fingernails raked over the bare skin of my back.

"Why not," I sighed as her lips connected with the sensitive spot just underneath my jawline,

"How am I supposed to touch you if you're still dressed?" I purred. Regina groaned as I bit her bottom lip and sucked it into my mouth.

"You…you're not supposed to touch me…that's the…the rule," she stuttered as I gently placed each hand on each of her breasts. I think I have maybe turned the tables.

"Well Ms Mills, aren't some rules meant to be broken?" I leaned in, pressing both my core and breasts harder into Regina. She practically whimpered when I started gyrating hard against her.

"Emma…" she gasped, her hands tightly winding into the back of my hair.

"So you'd oppose me touching you like…this?" I tweaked her nipples between my fingers as I continued to grind against her. She moaned loudly and smashed her head repeatedly against my sofa.

"God…stop it, stop touching me Emma, or I swear to God…" she hissed,

"Or what Regina," I definitely had the upper hand now, "what are you going to do? Punish me?"

"Yes," she seethed as she wrapped her fingers around my hips and pulled me harder against her,

"Oh no Ms Mills, what will you ever do to me?" I cooed as her eyes drooped further and her bottom lip slowly disappeared into her mouth. She was completely lost in the moment and I relished in it.

"Punish you…I…I have to punish you," she stuttered,

"How, I want to know everything," I ran my tongue against her earlobe and up into the shell.

"I don't know yet Emma,"  
"You want to know how I'd punish you Regina, hmm?"

"Tell me, tell me Emma Swan, what you do if I had been a bad, _dirty_ little girl?" she breathed. Her hips were now almost painfully grinding into me. All I wanted to do with rip off both of our panties, preferably hers with my teeth.

"I'd take your shirt off and run my tongue down in between your boobs," Shit, I had to think quickly.

"Dirtier, I need it dirtier, tell me Emma," her voice was barely above a growl. Shit, so hot. Talk dirty, oh shit. Okay, I could do this. I quickly glanced up at the fridge and remembered the whipped cream. I leaned down closer, and grabbed her hand, guiding it to my wet pussy.

"You know what I'd do? I'd chuck you down face first onto my silk bedspread, peel off my soaking panties, and tie your wrists up with them behind you back and…" Regina moaned loudly, "Then spread your legs, tying each one down and,"

"And, what else?"

"Eat you out,"

Regina gasped as my tongue grazed her bare throat, "then I'd flip you over onto your back, undo your legs but tie up your hands nice and tight above your head, and then I'd pull out the whipped cream,"  
"Mm, yes, oh god, yes,"

Whoa, Regina was getting off on me just explaining what I'd do to her. She was going to die when I finally get into the bedroom.

"I'd cover each breast with cream and lick it off slowly…and you know why?"

I edged my fingers underneath her panties and probed at her core, "why?"

"Because you've been a dirty little whore," I jeered as I plunged my fingers deeply into her centre. Regina threw her head back and split her legs further apart as I pumped my digits harder into her.

"Yes, yes, I've been a bad girl, haven't I Ms Swan?"

"Such a filthy little being," I encouraged. I had done it. I had won. Regina was like fucking putty in my hands. I felt her body tighten as I worked harder, using my other hand to knead her breast through that stupid designer shirt of hers.

"I…I…bad girl," I leaned down and licked Regina's other hard nipple through the material as she bucked against my hand, oh so desperately.

"Who's a dirty little girl?" I cooed as I ran my finger down over her split lips, "hmm Regina?"

"Me, I am. So naughty…"

"Do you want to know how to make amends with me?"

"Anything Ms Swan," Regina was so close to coming, it was actually crazy. I was cruel, but not that cruel.

"Come for me,"

And Regina did what she was told. She threw her head back again against the sofa and I lavished her neck with kisses as I finished her off.

"Good girl Regina, good girl," I whispered as the end credits played gently behind us.

* * *

a/n: *aims hose at wonderful readers*  
I HAVE A SMALL THING FOR ROPE DON'T I? and whipped cream, whoops. Don't worry guys, that 'particular' chapter will happen, I pinky promise...  
Also, I've actually never seen Black Swan so forgive me...


	16. Chapter 16

a/n: I just finished this chapter like 20 minutes ago, fuck.  
and omfg guys you are all fabulous, damn son. your reviews are excellent. **FLUFF AND MILD SEXY SHOWER TIMES?**  
y'all want your own Reginas! hahaha bless you ALL. And I have had a tonne of sexy time ideas flood my tiny little brain so I think you desperate bunch will be pleased with all the glorious things I have planned for these two.

Remember if there's an idea you'd like me to play around with, shoot me a PM or message on tumblr at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L in antlers is a one fyi)  
Love ya all, Emma xo (yes, that's my actual name...*sigh*)

* * *

I'm not entirely sure what the fuck happened last night but something definitely happened. I mean after the whole Regina-is-a-dirty-girl bit. I'm pretty sure. I briefly remember my hands under Regina's shirt and then she did some talented work to my Nether regions with that damn tongue of hers. I think there was some more alcohol involved at that point because she told me I tasted like bourbon. She'd probably located and downed four shots of the stuff before had me, knowing her slash my luck.

And somehow after it all, I ended up stretched out on the couch, stripped down to nothing but my racy purple underwear, being straddled by a softly snoring Regina Mills. Fuck, she was adorable. Her brown hair covered a large amount of her perfect face and I could see the strands flutter when she inhaled and exhaled.

I really needed to pee and it didn't help that Regina's hip was pressed right into my bladder. Straightening my leg, Regina slumped slightly, her side hitting the back of the sofa. She groaned as I attempted to slip away; she wrapped her arms around my chest. Fuck.

"Jesus Regina, let me go, you've got the vice of a bear," I cooed as I pried her fingers off my bicep,

"No," she mumbled.

"Regina, I will probably wet myself if I don't go,"  
"No,"

"Regina,"

"Emma…" Regina huffed as she grinded her knee into my centre. Oh man…wait, was she not wearing her skirt anymore? I peeked over Regina's shoulder and the heavens have heard my calling; Regina fucking Mills was bare from the stomach down, except for a scrap of red lace that she clearly called underwear. Who cares? Not me. Her legs went for miles and they were perfect and tanned. I think I'm going to need that toilet not only for just emptying my bladder in a second.

"Regina, your knee is not helping the situation,"

"I know," She giggled. Fucking hell, she was good. I peeled her fingers off of me and one of her eyes opened; the pupils dilated to epic proportions.

"What do you think you're doing Ms Swan?"

"Going to the toilet before I wet myself, and then getting some Panadol because my head feels like a train is running into it repeatedly,"

"Okay," she grumbled as she turned her face into the couch. Toilet, toilet, holy hell I needed the toilet.

* * *

Not much felt as good as an early morning pee. That, and maybe a shower and a hot cup of coffee, or maybe walking back into the kitchen to see a sleep-tousled Regina leaning against the counter.

"Good morning sunshine," I smiled. Clearly Regina was not a morning person as it took her a few moments to realise I had said something and to actually acknowledge it.

"Hey," her voice was thick and I prayed it was from the early morning and not from arousal because I don't think I could do another round of last night. Actually, I probably could with the way the breeze fluttered her shirt so it pressed softly against her bare boobs and stomach. Early morning sex, um ah yes please.

"Did you want coffee?" I asked as I filled the kettle. Regina glared at me with the same expression Henry does when I have to wake him up at 6a.m. Clearly that was a yes.

"Coffee it is,"

"How are you so awake?" She stifled a yawn and rested her forehead on my shoulder blade as I busied myself with making Regina a coffee with no sugar and double milk in a ladybug mug, and myself a black tea with two teaspoons of sugar in a blue polka dot mug.

"I have a thirteen year old son Regina," I quipped as I turned around, "someone's got to wake him up for school". She slipped slightly and stumbled into my arms. It felt awkwardly right and I wrapped my arms tightly around underneath her arms which had slung themselves around my neck. She sighed,

"And where is said son? I haven't seen him yet,"  
"I sent him to Ruby's," Regina stiffened, "He's good friends with her little brother Tom,"

"Ah, I see," Her nose brushed against my collarbone and I could've stayed like this forever if the bloody kettle hadn't pinged, "and will Master Henry be making an appearance anytime soon?"

"Nah, I have to pick him up from Ruby's house this afternoon,"  
"Oh," Regina frowned as she accepted the coffee.

"What?"

"What are you going to be doing the rest of the day Ms Swan?" She placed her cup onto the counter and lazily drew her eyes up and down my body. I felt extraordinarily self-conscious considering I was standing in my flashiest underwear and she was in a shirt and underpants. Her hands were suddenly on my stomach, running them up and down, and then over my butt.

"Um…saying that I was going to mark student's work is the wrong answer in your books, isn't it?"

Regina hummed in approval and pressed her lips to my jawline, "congratulations dear, you've caught on,"

"Is spending the day with you, correct?" She froze; my bottom lip pinned between her pearly white teeth. Regina tasted like coffee and spearmint toothpaste.

"If…if you'd like, I guess…I mean," Regina pulled away and bit her own lip; her arms still wrapped securely around my waist.

"If you don't want me around, that's fine. Just let me know, okay?" I grinned stupidly as she paled,

"No, no Emma, I do want to spend the day with you, I just...didn't…I don't know…"

"Anticipate me coming on so strongly?"

"Yeah, sort of,"

"Are you okay with it?" I glanced nervously down at the woman, who nestled her face into my chest, exhaling,

"It's refreshing, this change of pace,"

"Well everything with me is hard and fast darling," Regina snorted into my long hair that draped over my shoulders, "except for, you know…" I quickly backtracked but stopped when Regina giggled.

"Yes thank you for that, Ms Swan,"

"Except I'm hard and slow…or rough and fast or rough and slow, or whatever tickles your fancy,"

"Emma…"  
"Yes Regina?"

"Shut up,"

* * *

Regina had packed for the day ahead and I didn't expect anything different. She was constantly organised at work and no doubt that sort of crazy well planned lifestyle didn't go astray when she reached the threshold of her own home.

I piled the softest dang towel I owned into Regina's slim arms and she grinned at me.

"I do not recommend using Henry's bathroom, that kid is a grub, so here…" I motioned to my ensuite that I had cleaned within mere inches of its life, "use mine,"

"Like mother like son then?" She nudged the door open with her hip and sauntered in; dumping her stuff on top of the closed lid of the shiny toilet.

"Excuse me, Ms Mills, I am capable of cleanliness, I just don't often show it," I pouted as I crossed my arms over my chest,

"Your desk at the College begs to differ," she winked as she popped her hairbrush into the empty sink.

"It's not messy it's a… a controlled explosion,"

"Of course, how wrong of me to assume anything else other than a stationary version of Hiroshima,"

I glared at her playfully as she whacked me on the arm, "I need to shower Ms Swan, if you don't mind vacating this particular room…"  
"Or I could stay…" I pressed myself up against the Principal and guided her until her backside hit the lip of the sink. I snaked my hands up her shirt and kissed her on the neck quickly, "you know, if you'd _like_,"

"I'd love that more than anything, but," her breath hitched in her throat as she peeled my wandering hands off her warm body, "we both need to calm ourselves down,"

I groaned, "Why?"

"Because we're adults and not horny teenagers trying to get each other off at every possible moment,"  
"I want to get you off at every possible moment," I trailed my fingers over the waistband of her underpants,

"So do I so which is why I am asking you to leave the room so that I can shower. Naked,"

Well shit. Regina noticed my slight preoccupation and used it to guide me blindly out my own personal bathroom.

"I will be out soon dear," she smiled and clicked the door shut.

I busied myself with cleaning up last night shenanigans. After washing up our wine glasses repeatedly because heaven forbid I think about the fact that Regina goddamn Mills is naked and in my shower. There was a loud shriek from the general direction of my room and a wet splat.

"Emma!"

Shit, I've killed her, or maimed her or something disastrous, "Regina?" I sprinted into bedroom, my hands still covered in a filmy lather of suds.

"Emma…ah shit," Regina cursed as I heard loud bumps and a single bang as the shower door slammed back. She was as bad as my son, seriously, does no one know how to close doors quietly or?

"Regina, what the hell happened? Are you okay?" I knocked softly on the closed bathroom door and pushed it open slightly. She shrieked again,

"Close the damn door Ms Swan, I am naked,"

Oh boy, Regina's naked. I'd give my left arm to see her naked but preferably not damaged and bruised in my own damn bathroom. Regina sighed, "I'm fine, it's just your shower is different to mine dear,"

"Oh," I frowned. All of that was because she couldn't grapple the basic idea that all showers were not exactly the same?  
"I um, I'm going to need a new towel though, if you don't mind," Regina squeaked. There was a loud sucking sound and a downpour of water,

"What? Why?"

"My towel fell into the shower and now it's soaking wet on your bathroom floor. Does that suffice?" She was obviously ringing out the wet towel into the sink so I headed down the main hallway to the linen closet and pulled out a deep red towel from underneath all of my usual crusty and crunchy bath towels.

"Close your eyes Ms Swan," Regina stated loudly as I knocked tentatively on the door. Clearly she had forgotten that I had fucked her up against my couch last night and had seen more than I originally anticipated, but nonetheless.

"Regina, how am I supposed to see where I am going?" I clenched my eyes tightly shut and Regina sighed as I pushed open the door,

"How many fingers am I holding up?" Regina snatched the towel from my hands,

"Probably one; your middle finger,"

Regina snorted as she slammed the shower door closed, "very funny Ms Swan, now you can open your eyes,"

Please, be naked. Please, oh please, be naked. I blinked and was disappointed that she had disappeared from sight. Damn, where the hell did she go? I looked over to the shower and clamped my thighs tight together.

The glass door was in a permanent state of foggy because of some kind of special glaze on it, but that didn't exactly stop my imagination doing its thing at Regina's silhouette. It was one thing to see a woman completely naked but another, to see the outline of her delicious elusive figure. I watched her dry her face and turn sideways; her boobs and flat stomach and perfect rear end were all there on show. It was bloody glorious.

"You still in here Swan?"

My throat was thick, "Uh yeah,"

Regina chuckled as she brought the red towel in between her legs to dry her thighs and oh my god, I'd kill to be that towel right now.

"Enjoying the show?"

"Oh yeah," I cleared my throat, "understatement of the year Regina,"

"Good, now I definitely need you to leave because I got to get dressed," She was so fucking cocky and it was the hottest thing possible.

"Are you sure?"

Regina's silhouette turned to me and she had the most perfect curves in the history of curves.

"…No,"

"Would you care for me to help you get dressed?"  
My stomach was doing flips and I was fairly certain I was already pretty damn wet from just watching Regina.

"Hmm, no… But you can watch," My stomach was now somewhere in my bare feet. Balls of steel, Regina had balls of steel.

"Like an anti-strip? Yeah okay, I'm down for that," If I could see Regina's face right now, I think she'd definitely be smiling.

"Can you please get my clothes for me then Ms Swan?"

"And where would I find said clothes?"

"On the lid of the toilet dear,"

I scooped up the pressed clothing and as I moved too quickly, I hit my hip on the basin. Her clothes fell from my fingers and I quickly caught them all haphazardly as I stifled my yelp of pain. My eyes widened as I stared at the articles of clothing in my shaking hands.

"My clothes if you please?" Regina rested one hand on her hip, slightly annoyed but also clearly amused. Her clothes were normal; just a dark tee shirt and a pair of jeans if I had sussed them out correctly but it was the underwear that had my mouth watering. They were tiny scraps of champagne coloured silk that I knew for a fact, would complement her olive skin beautifully.

"Emma?"

"Uh, yeah, sorry, here," I quickly threw the clothes, one article at a time, over the door of the shower, pausing slightly at the silk panties. She didn't even thank me; probably assumed her little 'show' would be enough thanks. Chances were it was. We were silent as Regina slithered into her panties as gracefully and delicately as Cinderella would slip on her glass slipper. She hummed as she unzipped her pressed jeans and wiggled them up over her perfect arse. I watched and drooled and was so proud of myself that I hadn't stuck my hands down my pants. I mean, yeah she was getting dressed but it wasn't entirely…hand-down-pant worthy, yet. Until…until, until the Lord graced me with a moment of Regina losing her balance ever so slightly on the slippery shower floor. She yelped and her bare chest pressed up onto the glass door. Regina slammed one open palm against the door to steady herself and I almost ripped open the door and had her right there. Her nipples were magnificent and brown and mixed with the humidity inside the shower cubicle, definitely had me dry mouthed.

"Oh dear," Regina breathed. I wonder if she did that intentionally,

"Holy shit,"

Seriously, my name was Emma 'Classy' Swan, I swear. Her fingers clenched tightly as she heard me swear,

"Oh _Ms Swan_,"

I took step forward and put my hands up against the door, just over her breasts. I could feel the warmth of them through the glass. She huffed and straightened herself, peeling her damp chest off of the glass. Damn it. But I didn't move my hands. I watched a single finger of hers trail over the outline of my hand,

"Are you going to stay in there all day teasing me, or are you going to come out and face me, Ms Mills?" I growled playfully.

"I honestly don't know Emma, why don't you come in here and find out?"

I had almost yanked the door off its hinges before Regina had even finished her sentence. The humid smacked me right in the face as Regina stood stunned by my immediate reactions. She looked perfect with her wet hair tousled and dripping down her bare toned front and dampening the hem of her jeans.

"_Jesus_ Regina," I let my eyes travel hungrily over the woman, "how the actual hell a-" but she threw herself at me before I could finish my exclamation; her legs wrapping tightly around my waist, throwing me off balance. I stumbled backwards and hit my back hard onto the cold bathroom wall. Regina crushed her lips forcefully onto mine. She pressed her boobs hard into mine and ran a single finger down over the apple of my cheek. Good God.

"Fuck, you are perfect," I mumbled into the crook of her shoulder, "so perfect,"

"And all yours," she breathed as she slowly placed hot open mouth kisses down my neck.

* * *

Literally have no idea what the fuck this chapter is, I can only apologise? Do I EVEN apologise? I don't know man...  
Anyway, I can't promise I will be updating tomorrow but nonetheless, I will try.  
And more sexy times are promised, just not...immediately... I've still got to write them, fuck.  
please review xoxo


	17. Chapter 17

a/n: apparently this fic is hazardous to some people's health? like, apparently it's not okay I leave half of you in a mild state of arousal and all needing a cold shower? oh no, how EVIL and UNTHOUGHTFUL of me ;) ;) mwahahaha.  
okay, no sexy times but somehow, plot? in this chapter but it's gunna mildly prepare you for something I have in stall for these two...  
Happy reading! Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com) x

* * *

We had a cute morning if you classify Regina having me on almost every single surface of my house in a matter of hours, cute. The woman was _insatiable_ and I was totally okay with it. Regina had happily stated that she was 'mine' but the marks she left on my pale clearly suggested that I was in fact, her little bitch. There's only so much I was capable of covering up with long shirts, trousers and concealer. How the hell we were going to be able to control ourselves at school was beyond me.

It had reached 2 in the afternoon before Regina half-heartedly proposed the idea that she'd untangled herself from me. I was meant to pick Henry up in an hour and I was unable to locate the whereabouts of my trousers. We had made it to my bed, of all places, which was a fucking miracle. Regina was splayed out across my partially clothed body, her chin resting on my chest, her wide brown eyes staring up at me.

"I'm sure Ruby wouldn't mind waiting for a little while longer,"  
"You said that two hours ago," I muttered as she kissed down my abdomen.

"Yes, but you are mine and I will do as I please," she slurred into my navel as her fingers knotted themselves in between mine.

"Not before I get to have my way with you," I groaned as Regina kissed the skin just above the hem of my underwear and wiggled her way back up my body.

"Did you not achieve what you wanted this morning and last night?" She nibbled at my bare neck,

"Babe, that was just a taste of what I'm capable of,"

She moaned, "And what exactly are you capable of dear?" Regina breathed hotly into my ear and snapped her teeth together; the shiny enamel of her front teeth grazing my earlobe.

"Do you remember that frightening afternoon in your office where I borrowed your shirt?"

"Mm," Regina agreed as she nuzzled her face against my skin and pressed a kiss to the tip of my nipple.

"Remember what I said about rope and whipped cream?"

Regina pulled back, her eyes wide but almost completely black, "I beg your pardon?"

"You heard me,"

"I…I, yes, but, wait what?"

I giggled at her reaction and planted a chaste kiss to her cheek as she mulled over what I had just said.

"Sweet Jesus Ms Swan," Regina purred as she visibly clenched her thighs.

"But I'll save that sweet little gift for some time special,"

"Well good thing for you my birthday is soon,"  
"Oh, is it now?"  
"Yes indeed,"  
"I wonder if you'll last that long Ms Mills,"  
"Says you," Regina glared at me,

"Excuse me, I have the perfect amount of self-restraint Regina," I smirked as she rubbed her head once again into my chest like a cat would while waiting to be fed. She was hungry…but not for food.

"Are you sure?" Her lips fell onto mine hungrily. I felt her tongue push its way into my mouth. Well shit. She was good, I'd give her that. Once again my legs were weak and my hands instantly went to grab the back of her thighs.

"I'm…_sure_," I gasped as the flat of her tongue run down my neck,  
"Sure, you're sure?"

"Regina…"

But she wasn't listening. She guided her tongue skilfully down to my clavicles and suddenly her damn hand was cupping my boob, "Regina…"  
"Mm," Regina nipped at my neck, "yes dear?"

"Stop,"

"No,"

"_Regina_!" I said a little more forcefully. She pulled back and glanced at me curiously,

"What? Isn't this what you want?"

"Yes…yes but no!" I stumbled over my words as her hands trailed down my stomach, stopping at the waistband of my underwear.

"But this is what I want," She purred as she hooked her finger over the edge of my panties and pinged it against my skin. Once again, she smashed her lips onto mine and pushed me quite painfully into the mattress with all her might. Possessive Regina was hot, that's for sure, and I was melting like a cube of butter in the hot sun that was Regina Mills. It was taking every inch of willpower in my body not to throw the woman onto her back and have her right then and there.

"I'm sure Ms Lucas wouldn't mind having Henry for just a few more hours, don't you think Ms Swan?" Before I could answer, Regina ran the flat of her tongue up over my slight Adam's apple and hooked my calf over her hip, grating her fingernails down the bare skin of my thigh. I needed strength…I needed willpower…I needed Regina one last fucking time.

* * *

It took a great deal of strength to remove the fantastic Regina Mills from my house but it was necessary as I had a son to pick up and she had to do some kind of last minute write up for a stupid school fundraiser or some shit. I wasn't really paying attention.

I flicked a quick text to my best friend slash impromptu babysitter as I pulled out of my driveway, tugging awkwardly at the scarf that I donned quickly after Regina's departure. Ruby responded immediately with her address as I stopped at the lights. Of course she lived in the swanky part of town, damn it.

Her house was one of those new flashy single storey houses in a new estate just outside of town. It literally looked like something out of one of those good living magazines. There were still a few bulldozed allotments around her home as I pulled into her pebbled driveway.

I knocked loudly on the white washed front door and waited awkwardly with my hands shoved in the back pockets of my jeans. There was a bit of fumbling before the miniature male version of Ruby heaved open the door,

"Hey Ms Swan!" he beamed,

"Hey there Tom, is Ruby in?" I toed off my converse shoes and stepped into the tiled hallway of Ruby's house of wonder.

"Yeah sure, hold up," he turned on his heel and sprinted down the hallway, "Ruby, Ruby!"

"What?" Ruby chimed from somewhere down the other end of the house. I padded awkwardly through my co-workers house, eyeing off each room as I went past it.

"Ms Swan's here!" there was a crash and a bit of cursing from Ruby,  
"Swan! Get your arse into the kitchen now!"

"If I knew where it was, I would," I yelled back.

"Christ, it's not that hard Swan, follow the hallway to the end and turn left. You can't miss it,"

I did what I was instructed and entered the part-kitchen part-dining room.

"Fuck Ruby, how can you afford something like this?" I gazed around in amazement. Ruby, dressed in a red plaid shirt and black jeans, just shrugged as she popped some dirty dishes into her dishwasher,

"Perks of having like two rich ex-husbands,"

I gaped at her, "_what_? Seriously, two ex-husbands before you're even thirty?"

"Yeah, both were fucking weird arse old men," She shuddered dramatically, "ten out of ten, do not recommend,"

I wasn't going to push the topic any further, "talking about weird as men, where's my son?"

"Playing the Xbox with Tom in the lounge room," Ruby threw a dishwasher tablet into the machine and clicked on. It whirred away loudly as she opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of wine.

"Yes!" I groaned before she even asked me. Ruby lifted an eyebrow at me as she scooped two wine glasses from the cabinet.

"That bad, huh," She giggled as we went outside and sat down on the patio.

Ruby twisted the top off and filled my glass to the rim.

"It wasn't bad Rubes, it was fucking glorious," Ruby drank heavily from her glass with both her eyebrows up in her hairline.

"You sound shocked," she cleared her throat and tucked her feet underneath her, settling in for the long chat.

"I am shocked,"

"Literally, how are you shocked? We both knew she'd be a goddamn goddess when it came to sex,"

"Yeah but…not this good,"

Ruby choked slightly, "what? She's _that_ good?"

"Ruby, we had sex _fourteen times_ in the space of twenty hours; eight hours of that was spent sleeping,"

"Jesus fucking Christ, how are you still able to walk?"

"With great difficulty,"

"If you say it was all in the bed, I will smack you upside the head," She glared before breaking out into a wide grin, "come on Swan, spill the details,"

"Twice on the couch, three times on the kitchen counter, three on the floor, twice in the shower, twice up against the wall and twice in bed,"  
"Well fuck me, that's impressive," Ruby puffed out her cheeks and leaned further back into her chair.

"Cheers," I took another gulp of my wine.

"So, now what,"

"What do you mean, now what?"

"Well, are you guys just going to be fuck buddies or are you going to mature this relationship like a Frenchman would do to a piece of fine cheese?"

"I'd really like to cheese it," Smirking at her dairy analogy,

"Cheese it is," she raised her glass up in toast and downed the rest of the alcohol like it was a shot.

"But how does one, 'cheese' it?"

"I don't know man," Ruby shrugged, pouring herself another glass, "just be your cute adorable self and like, surprise her with gifts and intense make out sessions in storage closets and stuff,"

"I'm so bad at this, I swear," I made a mental note of finding out Regina's favourite flower.

"Nah, it's not. I promise. Actually…" she quickly unfolded her legs and sprinted to the kitchen; "hold on Swan," Ruby searched frantically through the drawers until she came out again holding a spare piece of paper and a pen. She scrawled 'Project Regina' at the top and slammed the pen down on top.

* * *

"Okay man, we've got all afternoon and night until we're back at work tomorrow and back to the hot piece of ass you call your fuck buddy, now," she underlined 'Project Regina', "has she said anything or suggested anything she'd like you to do?"

"Like, sexually or relationship wise?"

"Either,"

"Um," I wracked my brain, "wait yes,"  
"Hit me," she eagerly pressed the tip of the pen to the paper. Ruby had her tongue poked out slightly to the side, "hit me with your best shot," she sung.

"She said she wants me to parade my finest, um, underwear around in her office at work,"

Ruby just nodded and scribbled down a shorthanded note.

"What else,"

"Uh, Regina likes to power play…" Ruby rolled her eyes,

"Duh, thank you Swan; everybody knows that,"

"Well, maybe, I don't know, I could abuse that…"

Ruby eyed at me before leaning back into her chair, "hmm, is little innocent Ms Swan suggesting what I think she is?"

I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, "maybe,"

"You'd play submissive and dominant sex games with Regina?" Ruby's eyes twinkled mischievously.

"Yeah,"

"Cute," Ruby giggled and wrote down the idea.

"And her birthday's coming up too," the Art teacher looked lost for words,

"That's fucking perfect, holy shit Emma, this is brilliant," she scribbled down the word 'birthday' in large letters and circled it.

"Why? How? What?"

"Clearly, you're awkward with the whole 'sexual power play thing'" she made air quotes as she wriggled her butt into her chair, "so, that could totally be her birthday present. It'd be the best fucking birthday present in the existence of birthday presents,"

I wrinkled my nose at it, "like I'd be submissive?"

"Hell yeah," she gasped and clapped her hands enthusiastically, "oh my god, we could totally go shopping for this! I know the best sex shop; it's just down near…"

"Ruby, stop please!" I raised my hands up. Ruby pouted dejectedly, "I love the idea, I do, but I feel uncomfortable, you know, about this,"  
"That's cool, I totally understand," She smiled genuinely, "sorry, I'm just a little bit enthusiastic about it,"  
"Clearly. But I think I could do it, subtly…"

Ruby scoffed as my brain worked at a million miles an hour, "Oh and how the hell are you going to go sex shopping subtly?"

"Dog collars and leads can be bought at those cheap and nasty dollar stores right?"

Ruby's eyes widened, "shit, perfect. Oh my god, wait. We have a baking fundraiser coming up and Regina is doing the shopping for it. Totally go with her, then hit up that dodgy looking dollar store in the main shopping centre and just…hint at it, shit, yes!" She clapped again and started laughing, "Holy shit this is going to be brilliant," she exclaimed. Here I was thinking Regina was going to be the death of me, but the devious Art teacher sitting in front of me was coming in as a close second.

"Mum!" Henry exploded out the back door and barrelled into me, throwing his arms around the back of my neck.

"Hey kid! Have a good time?" I beamed up at the boy. He clearly hadn't washed his face, brushed his hair or hell, even brushed his teeth.

"Yeah, it was heaps good. I totally ate a whole pizza to myself and kicked Tom's butt at Halo,"

"Jesus kid," I rolled my eyes as he peeled himself off me almost immediately after Ruby giggled.

"Stop getting me in trouble with your Mum Henry," Ruby whacked Henry lightly on the arm and Henry smiled,

"Sorry Ruby," he mumbled before turning to me, "so how did the house inspection go yesterday?"

Ruby's head appeared at Henry's elbow, glaring at me,

"What? Oh right, house inspection. Yeah, we're good for another month," I squeezed his hand as Ruby dramatically rolled her eyes at me.

"Sweet; are we going? Because I've got to get my stuff together,"

"You and Henry more than welcome to stay for dinner if you want Emma, I've got more than enough food and I have to drop Tom off at my parents at like 8, so,"

"Really, I mean, yeah, sweet, cool," I grinned at her, "as long as you don't try to kill me then we'll be good,"

Ruby poked her tongue out at me as I called for Henry, telling him to have a shower because we'd be staying for food.

* * *

a/n: *_starts dancing around in a circle, clapping_* who knows what's gunna be ah-happenin'? ;) aw yeah,  
hope y'all signed up for some freaky deeky power play shit because Regina's birthday is soon (and by soon, I mean in a couple of chapters, NOT THE NEXT ONE, REPEAT, NOT THE NEXT CHAPTER) and little Emma wants to please the Head Mistress...  
SLEEP WELL MY LITTLE DARLINGS ;)


	18. Chapter 18

a/n: this was a bitch of a chapter to write, frick. I rewrote it like three times. But nonetheless, it's super long, with a hint of department store sex thanks to _heatwave16_ who PM'd me asking for it. (also shout out to _SirenMistress_ who caught on ;) )  
if you've got something you want me to work with, hit me up on here or inbox me on tumblr at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L is a one, fyi)  
it's also got French in it, so I used translator with a bit of my own French knowledge.  
I love you all, every single one of you little dumplings.  
Enjoy and pah-lease reviews! Cheers!  
Emma xo

* * *

It was Monday morning and I was actually excited for work. It was shocking. After Ruby's bloody excellent dinner she whipped up for us, she pulled me aside and told me I should initiate part one of 'Project Regina' which meant, sexy underwear time. As much as I adored Ruby's input on this, I had a slightly better idea up my sleeve that would hopefully work beautifully this afternoon assuming Regina was free after work.

I donned a slightly fancy set of red lace underwear; nothing like the kick ass pair I had on for Regina the other day. Over my second favourite assemble, came my Sport Monday selection of jean shorts, red converse and my staff tee-shirt. Hair was up and glasses were down. However, I was up and it was evident that Henry was still quite down…and by down, I mean, asleep.

"Henry James Swan get your butt up for school or so help me God," I pushed opened his bedroom door and was slightly stunned at the sight in front of me. Henry was up and about, cleaning his room and flattening the edges of his pristinely made bed. It stuck like the male aftershave section in a clothing store.

"_Christ_ Henry," I coughed and fanned my hand in front of my face dramatically,

"It's too strong isn't? Oh no," He furrowed his eyebrows and opened his windows, thankfully airing out the stuffy little room.

"Cologne? _Really_,"

"Tom said it'd help!" Henry whined, quickly shoving the offending bottle deeper into the depths of his black backpack.

"Does Tom know you're using it to impress his _sister_?" I said, putting my hands on my hips. My son took longer than usual to zip up his bag, clearly avoiding eye contact,

"...No,"

"Well then. Anyway, we've got to go homie, I've got an early class to sub and sadly, you're coming with me," I turned and fixed myself some toast and a portable cup of coffee for the ride over to the hell hole that was my workplace.

* * *

By sheer miracle, the school library was empty in the first period of class and I ushered my new found bunch of sleepy ten graders inside. I noticed a young brunette librarian staring intently at the computer monitor as my class threw themselves on any available couch and fell asleep. I'd bark at them later.

"Excuse me," I leaned up against the librarian's desk as the woman scrunched up her nose and squinted at the screen, "Excuse me!" I cleared my throat. The woman blinked and looked like she just received a shot of electricity up her spine,  
"Oh, damn it, hello, sorry, I was just…" she glared at the computer screen one last time and closed the insulting program down, "I hate modern technology,"

I picked up a foreign accent; South African or Australian or New Zealand?

"That's fine, but um, I just wanted to let you guys know I'll be using the library for the first period only, if that's cool,"

The librarian smiled as she pulled out a thick little blue book and flicked to today's date, "What's your name?"

"Swan but I'm taking Hook's class right now,"

The brunette slipped on a pair of glasses and ran her finger down the page,

"Yeah you should be fine; no other classes are going to be using here until Leroy what's-his-name in period four. The only people you're going to get in here now are the early morning studiers and the odd teacher searching for a book,"

"No doubt Astrid Nova's got the other half booked at that same time?" I smirked. The librarian tilted her head slightly and smiled softy, "of course, you can't pry those two from each other," she laughed. I patted the desk, "cheers Ms Librarian Lady,"

"Sorry, hi I'm Belle,"

"I'm Emma,"

* * *

"Can you lot actually look like you are doing something productive?" I seethed at the students. Some had the balls to rest an open Biology textbook on their resting head so it covered their large noggins like a tent.

"But _Miss_! It's so _early_," one groaned, "and it's _Monday_,"

"Fine, you want to slack off in this Biology class, that's fine by me, but don't expect sympathy from Mr Hook when the due date comes for your assignment," I took a sip from my coffee cup and wandered down in between the rows of books. I had a small thing for medieval books so I headed up over to the non-fiction section and scanned the row for something about knights or witchcraft or weaponry or something.

"Morning Regina," Belle called out.

_Oh shit_. Oh no, my class was asleep out in the main bit of the school library and I was hidden back here with my coffee cup and I knew for certain that the school treated cups of coffee in the library with the same seriousness as lines of coke.

"Morning dear, how are…" but her voice was cut off by the sound of at least twenty four hard backed Biology textbooks hitting the wooden floor simultaneously. I cringed as I heard Regina's heels clip against the flooring.

"Well, well, _well_…what do we have here?" She cooed. I pried two books apart on the shelf and Regina's back was to me as she clearly was evil eyeing my entire History class who all looked like they had a sudden shot of caffeine.

"Miss it won't happen again, we swear!" One girl squeaked. That chick had balls to stand up to Regina. Talking about Regina, did that woman own any clothing that didn't make me weak at the knees? Because that ensemble was practically mouth-watering; slate slacks, white long sleeved blouse rolled up to the elbows, a black vest and a pair of heels I'd happily have crushing my throat. Note to self, let Regina know that.

"I remember you from Ms Swan's History class last week…" Regina looked over her shoulder, obviously sensing my keen eye, and spotted my single blue eye immediately through the thick, dark books. Her eyes narrowed,

"Ms Swan…if you please,"

Ah shit. Yes, I might have fucked her, but she still owned my ass inside the grounds of Story Brooke College.

"Hey Ms Mills, didn't see you there," I stated uncomfortably as I scratched the back of my neck. The class had to stifle laughs as Regina neared my awkward self. Her back was to the class and thank God they couldn't see the way her eyes trailed over my body.

"Good morning Ms Swan, care to tell me why your substitute class is asleep in _my_ library?"

"Um, yeah…no," I muttered as I toed the wood flooring nervously.

"_No_?" She raised a single eyebrow at me as she took another step closer.

"I uh, figured that they were old enough to use their time wisely. If they wanted to sleep and waste time, fine by me. It's not me failing, it's them,"

Regina raised both eyebrows at me, "As delightful as that train of thought is, that's not how it works at Story Brooke,"

Was I actually getting in trouble with Regina? What the hell. She turned to my kids,

"Students you are all to work on your assessment pieces as of now while I have a little chat with your substitute teacher," she snipped. Yep, I was definitely going to get yelled at.

"Come with me Ms Swan," I noticed Regina went out to grab my hand but thought against it as she lead me to the back of the library, away from prying eyes.

* * *

And by yelled at, I meant she yelled into my mouth with her mouth mixed with a little bit of brutal tongue lashings. She'd manoeuvred us to the back wall, had my hands pinned to the side of my head and one thigh pressed in between my legs. Fuck, she was good.

"If I knew this was how you were going to punish me I would've been a bad little girl earlier on," I whispered into her ear as she lowered her leg. She groaned,

"You of all people should know how much I'd like to punish you for all your dirty little mistakes,"

The conversation I had with Ruby on Sunday raced through my mind. Oh, maybe it was a good idea.

I pressed my lips against hers again and tried to mentally figure out how I was to approach the situation of sex games. I already knew Regina wanted to be dominant; there was no doubt to that.

"Then maybe you should…" I purred as I gripped her hands tighter in mine. Regina leaned back and stared quizzically at me. I leaned forward and sucked on her earlobe; pulling it between my teeth and letting go,

"Oh _please_ punish me, Head Mistress," Shit, even I was turned on my own voice, "I've been a bad little girl and I _need_ a detention," shit, who knows what the hell it was doing to Regina. Her eyes darkened considerably as she hummed seductively.

"Well, well, dear, I'm sure that can be arranged," Her eyes glinted mischievously, "but every student needs a uniform,"  
"Nothing I can't handle Regina, leave it all up to me. Who knows this might be your birthday present," I kissed her cheek as she let go of me to straighten out her vest and flatten her hair. Her brown eyes were still very dark.

"Please do Ms Swan, your reward will be more than sufficient," she pointed her nose into the air and stalked off out of the library, leaving me quite aroused and slightly shitting my pants because she actually wanted what Ruby suggested.

* * *

The day had gotten progressively worse as the hours ticked by. When I said Regina was insatiable, I wasn't joking. She made every possible attempt at making out in between classes or on lunch break. I was totally okay for it except for the one time we had to make a quick escape out the staff bathroom because another female teacher came in at a really inconvenient moment.  
Finally the day had ended and yet I had not seen Ruby, which was a surprised considering I half-expected her to haul me into the closest empty classroom and demand to see what underwear I was wearing for my encounter for Regina. Her red car was here and somehow Leroy had actually managed to park his actual car inside the actual car park. I was proud.

Ruby, Mary Margaret and I had now made an unspoken agreement to park next to each other so I waited patiently for the two other ladies while staring intently at Regina's stupid shiny Mercedes Benz at the other end of the lot.

Other staff came and went, waving at me as they disappeared from the school grounds. Suddenly Regina appeared, dressed in her damn black trench coat, and I practically threw myself towards her car.

"Emma?" the coast was clear for a good thirty seconds as I roughly pushed Regina against her car and initiated, single-handedly, the most intense make out session I was capable of. I needed the woman to be putty in my hands before I spoke to her,  
"I was going to go shopping this afternoon, care to join me?" I breathed as I peeled myself off her just as two students walked past. Regina took a deep breath as she tried to settle her erratic heartbeat.

"All that for a bit of shopping Ms Swan," I raised my eyebrows at her, "And what exactly would we be shopping for? Would it be food dear?"

The coast was clear again and I grabbed Regina's hand and guided it up my shirt to my boobs. She gasped as she felt the lace and my perky nipples through the material.

"Oh no, something more…_delectable_ Ms Mills," I never used the word '_delectable_', like ever. Not even when it came to Granny's cupcakes, which were, in my opinion, as about as delectable as you could get.

"Consider me in, Ms Swan,"

"Meet me in town then," I winked and removed her hand from under my shirt even though she whined slightly.

"Oi Swan! Oh _shit_," Ruby called out, clearly not realising what she'd just interrupted. Regina's eyes narrowed at the sight of the other brunette walking beside Mary Margaret.

"What remarkable timing Ms Lucas…Ms Blanchard," Regina gave them a curt nod and looked me up and down, "see you soon Ms Swan…don't be late," She smiled as she unlocked her car door and sidled in.

"What do you mean, don't be late?" Mary Margaret asked as I ambled up to them, grinning widely with my hands tucked in the hem of my trousers. Ruby giggled knowingly as Regina started her car and drove out the lot, waving at us.

"Oh I'm just meeting up with her this afternoon, that's all," I swear Ruby's eyebrows were going to fall off at the speed she was waggling them at.

"Cute," Ruby chirped as we headed over to our cars; the shiny red convertible, the pale blue Getz and my dusty hunk of yellow shit.

"Anyway, why were you guys so late?" I jammed the key into the door lock and yanked open the door. Mary Margaret dumped her bags into her boot,

"We were finalising the last shopping list for Regina before the bake sale,"

"Yeah Regina was more than happy to accept you as co-shopper when we suggested it," Ruby giggled,

"Yeah more than happy; a little too happy if you ask me," Mary Margaret added.

"Cheers guys!" I started the engine and shot out the car park.

* * *

I found Regina in her trench coat waiting patiently at the front of the main entrance of the shopping centre. She had what I assumed a designer handbag in her hand. I knew this centre was far away enough from the school so that we wouldn't be inundated with school children but just a few if the kid's parents happen to take them here.

Regina looked like she was in her element as she guided us through the shopping centre to a little French boutique two shops down from the local post office.

"I know this place," I stated proudly as she pushed open the door; a little bell sounded. Regina seemed shocked at this bit of information,

"do you now?"

"Of course," I beamed as a little blonde French woman appeared from behind a rack of satin goods.

"Ah Ms Swan!" She clapped her hands together before faltering and stared wide eyed at Regina, "And Ms Mills?"

Regina and I looked at each other expectantly then back to the little moderately older woman who had paled considerably.

"Emma, care to explain how you know Marian?" Regina smirked as she cocked her head to the side. Marian swatted her hand playfully at us both and grabbed me by the bicep, pulling me down to her height.

"_Pour quoi vous etes ici avec Madame Mills?_ Why are you here with Ms Mills?"

Regina's eyebrows shot into her hairline. I pleaded at her to understand as I shrugged and went ahead in impressing the Principal of Story Brooke College with my French skills.

"_Je suis amis avec Mme Mills_, I am friends with Ms Mills" I was stumbling over my French but nonetheless, it had Regina staring at me like I was stark naked, "Uh_, nous achats_, we're out shopping,"

"_Dans un magasin de lingerie Emma? Allez, je suis pas un idiot, il est clair que vous devez etre frequentez cette femme_, In a lingerie shop Emma? Come on, I am no idiot, clearly you are dating this woman,"

I smiled sheepishly, "_Oui_, Yes"

Marian beamed at Regina, who stood dumbfounded, "You can speak French Emma?"

"Yeah," I muttered awkwardly as the blonde French woman directed us to a little section that had Regina written all over it, not literally of course.

"I met a young Ms Swan when she was over in Paris for a break and she told me she was from Boston and I said I was offered work there and would be leaving in the next three months. We exchanged emails and we became good friends,"

"Is that all? _Good friends_…" Regina glared at Marian as she tightened her grip on my hand. Sheesh, was she jealous? But Marian answered for me,

"Of course Mademoiselle; my _husband_ has strong affections for my little Emma," Marian cooed, clearly up any gay tinged air that festered between us as she flourished a particular raunchy set of underwear against my body.

"Hmm, if you don't mind Marian, I'd like to pick out what Emma wears as she is _mine_,"

"Hang on, I thought this was my shopping trip," I pouted as Regina ushered Marian out of the way and flicked through the sets of undergarments. Were we ever going to call each other girlfriend or just keep stating that we were each other's? I don't know but I did like the sound of being entirely Regina's.

"It was your shopping trip until you put my hand up your shirt and told me to come with you," She pulled several sets and herded me into a changing room.

Marian tried to help shimmy the material door but Regina stopped her with a trademark glare and the little woman disappeared up to the front desk where several other women had entered.

* * *

Regina was on me the moment the door was closed. She was feistier and so much more demanding than before. Her mouth latched onto my neck and she sucked hard like it was a damn lollipop. I wondered if she wanted to mark me as hers after that little fiasco with Marian. One hand moved up underneath my shirt and other was tearing my jean shorts over my butt and onto the floor.

"Jesus Regina, calm down," I hissed as she trailed kisses down my front,

"No, you are mine and nobody else's, and I'm going to prove that," she growled as she hooked my leg over her shoulder as she squatted down.

"Regina no, we're in a shop…a small shop…I don't think, shit," I gasped as her mouth connected with my centre through my panties. Fucking of course she was going to do this in a public place. Regina knew I wasn't exactly quiet when I came to sex and damn her for doing this. Damn her to the depths of shopping centre sex-based hell. She pulled my underpants to the side and finally her tongue hit me.

"We're…me…I'm meant to be buying underpants…not…not, _fuck_," I threw my head back against the wall and clawed desperately for some kind of purchase.

"Dear, I already know that the underwear I selected for you will look stunning on you. Trust me, I'll even pay for them if you promise to parade around for me in them," she bit the inside of my thigh and lavished it with her tongue. I squeaked.

"Everything okay in there Ms Swan," Marian asked through the door. I steadied my breath,

"Um, yeah, yep; everything's good Marian, the underwear looks great, I'll take them both please," I wheezed as Regina made no attempt at slowing down.

"Excellent!" I'll have another pair of each waiting for you at the counter," Marian walked off.

"Fucking hell that was close,"

"And so are you," Regina stuck two fingers in and I almost screamed. She was good, fucking hell she was the best damn thing that ever happened to me.

I couldn't think straight while I tumbled over the edge, being held up by Regina's strong arms. She peppered kisses up my stomach and solidified this act of public sex by kissing me smack on the lips where I could still taste myself on her tongue.


	19. Chapter 19

a/n: okay, massive warning ahead. this chapter is definitely **M rated** throughout. **sub/dom smut.**  
did not check grammer/spelling/tense before posting so i can only apologise.  
YOU WERE WARNED.  
Enjoy... ;)  
Emma x

* * *

That afternoon I drove back to my home, itching all the way back like I had ants in my pants. The stupidly glorious wrapped package of undergarmental goodness sat on the passenger seat of my bug and I couldn't stop looking at them every time I stopped at the traffic lights. Regina had bought them for me. _Me._ And damn, that meant I had to parade them around to her at some point in the near future. Actually, I could probably do it tomorrow. My grip tightened considerably on the steering wheel as I pulled up onto the curb of my property. The sky was a nice salmon colour with bits of bright orange near the setting sun. I slammed the door closed, hid the bag in the folds of my jacket and stomped my way up the damn steep ass driveway, collecting the post on the way.

"Henry… you alive," the screen door banged shut as I dropped my keys into the fruit bowl and flicked off my converse.

There was a groan from the general direction of the couch. I noticed a large Henry-shaped lump of mismatched blankets curled up, spooning a fluffy pillow.

"Barely…" he moaned. Shit. My mother instincts kicked in and I sat down next to him, dragging my heavy son onto my lap. Henry went full on koala mode and wrapped his arms around my neck and nuzzled me.

"Okay, something is definitely wrong if you're showing this much affection," I joked as I stroked his back soothingly and almost gasped when his flaming hot forehead connected with my cheek, "shit kid," I rested the back of my hand against his forehead and cringed.

"How long have you been feeling like this?" I slowly rocked him back and forth like how I used to when he was four. My fingers played with his hair as his breath steadied against my neck.

"Since…since period five…I asked for you at the staffroom but they…said you were with Regina," he mumbled, yawning. Shit, parenting one oh one, never ditch your kid for a hectic make out session with the hot principal. I cringed internally.

"Yeah, sorry kid; you should've texted me or something,"  
"No phones at school," he giggled as I slapped him softly on the shoulder,

"Whatever Mr Smarty-Pants; if it's an emergency, you should text me next time, okay?"

"Yes Mum," he smiled and leaned back, his back hitting the couch, leaving him taking up the whole dang couch with his legs crossed on my lap. I seriously needed a bigger couch.

"You're going to have the day off tomorrow good sir, but you are to stay in bed and sleep, got it?"

I picked his legs up off my lap and patted his thigh as he nodded into the pillow.

* * *

Damn it, Regina was right. My ass looked fabulous in this underwear and I was totally unaware my boobs were capable of being perkier. Fuck yeah. I stared at myself proudly in my massive full length mirror. Regina will be drooling the moment I stepped into her office like this. Stepped? Wait. I destroyed my wardrobe to find the one of the many pairs of 'fuck me' heels I owned. Hell fucking _yeah._ That's how one should step. Tomorrow I'll wake up earlier just so that I could look my complete and utter hottest. Regina won't know what hit her. I giggled to myself as I checked the time; 8:48p.m. Ah shit, Henry was still passed out on the couch but I guess he's sick so he should be fine there. I quickly stripped off the beautiful set off of my body and folded them delicately like they were strips of gold. I mean, I was only wore them for less than five minutes, I guess they were still okay for tomorrow? I sniffed my bra and it still smelt freshly-store bought. Oh well.

* * *

Yes, I may be a morning person but this was just hell. Who gets up at six in the morning? I mean, what regular person does, who's not trying to impress their hot boss? Jesus.

I peeled myself out the sheets of my bed and threw myself into the shower.  
Life is so much better in the shower.

Okay, shower completed, outfit chosen, and I had checked that my son is still moderately alive on the couch. Excellent start to the morning and it wasn't even seven. It was pretty cute to think that Regina was the only one capable of pulling off the sexy teacher look. Did I have a low messy bun? Yes, did I have a white blouse? Yes and a high waisted pencil skirt? Hell yeah. I threaded a thin grey belt through the belt hoops as I awkwardly got myself into my heels. Walking in heels wasn't a problem, it was the getting into them and out of them that was the trouble. My self-confidence was through the roof and I even sauntered into the kitchen to see if I still had it. Oh yes, I still got it.

Henry grunted good morning and wriggled himself further into the pile of blankets. I left a half used sheet of Panadol and a huge glass of water for him on the coffee table.

Today was going to be good, even though my son is probably dying from cold from hell but nonetheless, I could feel it was going to be good.

* * *

And I was right.

No sub classes and hell the entire administration was sympathetic when I told them Henry would be home for the day. Even Malory, Regina's bitchy little personal secretary was nice to me. But the moment I stepped into the official school grounds wearing my attire, I didn't feel too great when I had quickly obtained the stares of the entire male population of Story Brooke College; ah yes, the little downside that I completely forgot about; _men_. I mean the outfit wasn't as risqué as Regina's previous attempt at sexy school teacher, I mean, my skirt was just at my knees and the buttons of my top were done up. The other staff just turned a blind eye. Ruby high fived me and applauded me while Mary Margaret just seethed from a distance, jealous that that she hadn't thought of doing this with David.

* * *

I hadn't seen Regina yet and it was first lunch, but my luck changed when the staffroom phone rang. My desk happened to be almost right next to it so I was the unofficial phone answerer,

"Cheers for calling the sickest staffroom in existence, which member of extreme excellence requires your attention?"

Yeah, I was definitely official in my business but I think the administration had given up on chastising me for my improper answering techniques. I twirled the cord in between my fingers as the person on the end sighed loudly. Shit, it was Regina.

"_Ms Swan, how many times have we told you to answer the phone in the main staffroom as_ 'main staffroom, who do you require?'"

"Yeah but what fun is that?" I snorted as I motioned to the other staff in the room that it was simply Regina.

"_What if I happened to be a parent Emma? What would they think?_"

Stupidest question in the history of questions,

"That, uh, you've hired the coolest bunch of people in the world, duh,"

Regina made a noise that sounded like she was already completely fed up with me and it wasn't even midday. I caught on quickly,

"Would you like me to come and have lunch with you?" I whispered.

"_Preferably, after you've grown up dear, but yes please_".

* * *

Our shared lunchtimes usually consisted of locking the door and brutally making out until the bell rang for class. But today was different. Regina didn't know it, but I sure as hell did. I was wearing my super excellent underpants and 'fuck me' heels.

I sauntered down the main corridor that lead up to Regina's office on the right. I made a damn point of clicking my heels. I never wore heels to work and Regina freaking knew that. She didn't look up as I leaned up against the doorframe, making sure my skirt was now properly above my knees and hanging out around my upper thighs. Fucking hell yeah, she was wearing my favourite dress of hers; the slate grey one that hugged all her curves deliciously.

"Malory, I'm sorry, I'm already booked for lunch…" Regina flicked through some papers on her desk, staring intently at them through her glasses.

"Aw what a shame Ms Mills, I had something _delectable_ to share with you," I put on my sweetest voice and twirled a loose strand of my blonde hair. I prayed to God that she remembered the conversation yesterday afternoon about the word 'delectable'.

Her head snapped up at record speed.

"Emma, I…" she licked her lips and took in every detail of my fabulous outfit, "just…wow,"

I said nothing as I edged in, closing the door behind me firmly and flicking the lock. Regina was frozen and I didn't take my eyes off her as I closed the blinds and we were dropped into almost complete darkness. The shadows that danced on Regina's facial features were soft and I could see how her pupils dilated and her breathing quickened.

"Push your chair out," I hissed. Regina did just that. Her fingers curled over the edge of the chair's armrest in anticipation.

"Now, I don't have class until an hour after lunch so I'm going to take my sweet time with you Regina,"

I hadn't really thought this out at all so I just went with whatever felt natural, and right now, natural felt like hopping up onto Regina's desk, splitting my legs and putting her hand up my shirt with her face frightfully close to the apex of my thighs.

I pinned one of Regina's roaming arms in between the curve of my heel,

"I want to play a game Head Mistress," I cooed as I slowly unbuttoned the first few buttons of my straining shirt.

"And what game would that be, Ms Swan?" Her throat was hoarse and that made this two hundred times hotter.

"Have You Ever, Emma Swan edition,"

"We, I, don't have any alcohol,"

Was that all she could muster? Fuck, I must be really turning her on.

"That's okay, Emma Swan addition doesn't require alcohol, _I_ ask all the questions and it's just the removal of clothes," I pinged at the bra strap that had somehow appeared on Regina's shoulder. She was a woman of class and to see something her all hot and bothered like this, really, _really_ made me happy.

"Okay," Regina's eyes were already mentally undressing me.

"Hmm," I put a heel on either armrest and leaned my knees together. Regina's free hands ran up and down my calf and slightly up higher to my thighs, "have you ever…kissed a girl?"

I thought it'd be best to start slightly innocent and work my way up to darker, more delicious things later on.

Regina groaned and removed one single shoe from her stockinged foot as I took off my fancy necklace.

"Ever had sex with a girl?"

She didn't take her eyes off me as she took off her other shoe and placed it precariously next to the other one. I unbuttoned my entire shirt but took out my hair fully. The curls splayed down my back and over my shoulders.

"Have you ever…" this one was a doozy; I wanted to see her reaction because it'd be perfect, "have you ever masturbated to the idea of me?"

Regina halted her exploring hands, "yes,"

Well fuck me sideways, I was not expecting that answer. I mildly hoped for it, but I didn't think I'd _actually_ get it.

"...Yes, I have," She twisted her hands up behind her back and undid her necklace as well. Regina Mills had masturbated to me. Jesus Christ, it was like Christmas came early.

"You?" she asked ever so innocently. I wasn't going to lie. I cocked my head to the side and spilt my legs slightly,

"What? Masturbated to you…? Yeah, yeah I have," I ripped my shirt clean off my shoulders and chucked it on the floor behind me. Regina was on me the moment I swivelled around back to face her. Her fingers grasped at my skin, trying to pull me flush against her as her mouth practically destroyed mine in the process. Note to self, how to turn on Regina Mills, admit you got yourself off to the idea of her. Regina inhaled deeply against my skin as she bit and kissed my neck,

"Ms Swan, telling me that little trinket of information has me aroused than you standing naked in front of me, ever will,"

That was mildly offensive, and terribly hot, and definitely a Regina Mills kind of statement.

"Good, because I haven't finished yet," I grabbed Regina's face between my hands and pulled her softly against my own lips, just to chuck her off balance from angry sex mode. My tongue trailed against her lips and I quickly let her free. Regina's eyes were wide and frenzied and holy shit, her perfect lipstick was smudged. It was so hot. I heard a low growl from the back of her throat but she managed to keep herself controlled.

"Now, it's time to get a little darker with the questions…" Regina whispered as she tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. I drew a finger over my lips and exhaled into my open mouth.

"Ever been tied up?"

I unbuckled my belt and threw it onto the ever-growing pile of discarded clothes, "and I loved it,"

"Ever donned leather?"

One earring was out.

"…Ever used a whip?"

Fuck, the other earring.

"Ever played dominant?"

I slipped the skirt over my hips without even standing up.

"Ever played submissive?"

Ah ha, hell no. I winked at her as I sat dressed only in my underwear and heels. She grinned at me mischievously,

"Oh dear, I'm going to change that very quickly,"

* * *

When I thought she meant 'quickly' I thought she meant, like next week. Not now. And right now I was on my fucking knees with my hands tied behind my back by a spare blue computer cord Regina had handy. She held my belt loosely between her fingers, making a point of trailing the cold steel buckle down in between my shoulder blades as she circled me. The bell had gone ages ago and Regina ducked out for quick second to alert the admin that I'd apparently gone home to look after Henry and would require a sub for my last class of the day. Oh, such lies.

"Hmm, never been submissive then dear?" she cooed as she stopped right behind me, leaning forward, pressing her boobs into my back.

"No Ma'am,"

Regina huffed in content at my response.

"I'll have you know, I can be a brutal mistress, but that's what you want isn't it Emma? Because you need to be punished,"

I bit my tongue to silence my stupid witty remark. I rolled my eyes as Regina entered my line of sight. Whoops, probably not the best idea. She snarled and wrapped the belt around my neck; guiding the tip of the belt through the buckle then she pulled hard. Actually, that was a pretty damn good idea.

Regina tightened and stood behind me again. At some point, I fell backwards to sit on my legs folded beneath me. Apparently Regina was not going to have this because she stepped onto both of my ankles with her silky foot and yanked the belt upwards. I yelped as I shot upwards, my back curved inwards and my eyes looking straight up to a smirking Regina. She tutted and ran her fingernail down over my slightly protruding spinal cord. That finger trailed around to my front and flatted out to a full palm. Regina cupped my boob and gave it a good squeeze before falling down to her knees in between mine, behind me. I could feel her stockings rub against my calf muscles. She yanked the belt again and I fell slightly backwards and was flush against the ruthless Principal.

I felt her perked nipples in my back and her breath on the back of my neck as her other free hand trailed feverishly down the front of my stomach, heading towards my flashy set of underwear. To top it all off, Regina was definitely grinding her front into my butt. I tried to pull myself off her just to see what she'd do and Jesus Christ, she wrapped her arm around my waist and pulled me back against her and slipped her fingers down into the front of my panties. She didn't wait at rubbing with her thumb and sticking two fingers inside me. I instinctively bucked against her hand and in one fluid motion; she pulled herself out of my pussy and shoved me forwards so my chest hit the carpeted floor with a thud.

"Ow, what the hell," Regina pressed one foot against the base of my neck and dipped the other end of the belt up and down once again on my spine. She flicked the belt and it cracked across my pale flesh. Holy shit, I was unhappy at being submissive but Jesus, having Regina do this to me was ecstasy.

"I have a meeting in twenty minutes and I'd like to be done with you _troublesome_ human being in ten, got it?"

I couldn't tell if she was being serious or not but I bloody hoped this next ten minutes would be the best ten minutes of my goddamn life.

"Now…" Regina stood up, and with one finger on the crown of my head, circled me until she was in front of me. I was so turned on from power hungry Regina that if she didn't sate me now, I'd probably scream. I kept my eyes trained on the intricate design of the carpet until I heard material swish against skin. I lifted my head expectedly and Regina slammed it back down. She laughed softly and menacingly. There was a clipping noise and Regina placed one foot underneath my chin and twitched it slightly. I looked up and purred in enjoyment. Regina's dressed with hitched up around her hips but that wasn't what had me. She had a damn black lace garter belt that clipped onto thigh-high stockings. Jesus fucking Christ, I was practically melting. Her eyes darkened as her own fingers slipped into her panties and pulled the material away from her centre.

"You've been so obeying Emma; I think you deserve a treat," I eyed off her gleaming centre like a fucking vulture.

"Go on, have a taste dear," she tightened the belt around my throat and pulled me up,

"_Taste it_,"

I put one hand onto each ass cheek and buried my face into her. She moaned loudly and dipped her fingers into her mouth. She tasty like fucking heaven and hell mixed together because I knew I shouldn't be doing this submissively but damn it, I was eating her out in her goddamn office. I could feel her clenching tightly around my strong tongue. She was going to come soon and shoved my mouth harder into her pussy.

"Emma…Emma, I can't…" she gasped and threw her head back hard against the stone wall, "Fuck, Emma"

"Yes Mistress?"

"I need to, I need to…" We both knew what she was trying to say but I quickened the pace by putting a single finger inside her as well as my tongue.

"Fuck, fuck, _fuck_," Regina bit down on her bottom lip as she tumbled over the edge into my mouth. With her fingers knotted in my hair, she finally rode out her orgasm on my stiff tongue.

* * *

Regina was quick with putting the room back into order. She threw my clothes at me while she yanked her dress back down her hips and straightened her desk. Her hair was still messy as fuck but she whipped out a small hand mirror from her drawer and fixed her appearance which meant new lipstick, much to my displeasure. She grinned at me and snaked her hand around my waist as I zipped up my skirt. Regina kissed me deeply,

"That was wonderful. I daresay we should do it again sometime Ms Swan," she winked.

"Your birthday's coming up babe, who knows what'll happen," she cupped my face and kissed me softly. It was a nice contrast to her usual maniac behaviour when it came to making out.

"I'm looking forward to it. Anyway dear, use the backdoor, the office already thinks you're at home with Henry," She pecked a kiss on my cheek in between each word and smacked my ass as I tiptoed out down towards the back entrance.

I hate to admit it, but I think I fancied Regina a hell a lot more than I originally planned. 

* * *

a/n: oh you got that chapter was good?  
well my delightful readers, it's not even Regina's birthday...  
*_turns hose on_* merry christmas motherfuckers ahahaha


	20. Chapter 20

a/n: hola amigos, sorry for the wait; didn't mean it, having a rough time at the moment...nonetheless, here we are. LONG CHAPTER OF CUTE SWANQUEEN FLUFF. no smut, #soznotsoz.  
I cannot actually believe the amount of love I am receiving for this fic, it's unbelievable. apparently it has been recommended on tumblr so like, I AM DYING THAT'S SO COOL THANK YOU ALL.  
feel free to chat to me on tumblr at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L is a 1)  
love you all, i swear xo  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

I was not in love with Regina Mills; I was not in love with Regina Mills. That has been my mantra for the past week and a half. I was so totally not in love with Regina Mills. I fucked her, that's all. I fucked with my mouth and not with my heart so why did image of her writhing above me stay ever present in my mind?

"Because it was hot, that's why," I literally answered my own question as I leaned my head down and squished my forehead into the pine wood of my staffroom desk. I felt my red marking pen digging into my skin and I did nothing to relieve the pain.

"Ms Swan?"

A young girl's voice came from the general direction of the door and I grunted in acknowledgement.

"Mm, Swan speaking," I rolled my head to face the student and she giggled at my clearly crumpled facial expression. The pen had stuck to my forehead and it fell and hit me on the nose,

"Shit," I sat upright and brushed my nose and smiled at the shy looking girl, "I mean…shivers,"  
"Nah it's alright Miss," she came in and plopped herself beside me. She was definitely familiar but I could put a name to a face.

"What can I do for you, young lass?" I stifled a yawn and slung my lanyard over my neck. It was already Thursday afternoon and I was dressed in less-than-suitable attire for my usual Thursday Sport; that is, if crazy arse short shorts and one of my son's old comic tee shirts that somehow fitted me like a glove, was deemed inappropriate. Regina fucking lapped it up and didn't even throw me a warning, just a simple 'try not to bend over too much' with an added bonus wink that suggested that yes I could actually bend over, just only in front of her.

"You're Henry Swan's Mum right?" She bit her lip awkwardly and I noticed her cheeks were slightly redder than when she first appeared at the door. Oh, this could be cute… and awkward, oh no.

"Yeah, that I am; clearly this isn't an educational visit?" I leaned back and stretched my arms above my head.

"Yeah no, I just um… is Henry okay? I haven't seen him around for a few days,"

"He's just sick, nothing to worry about," I reached out to touch her arm but thought against it considering the whole school regulations and stuff.

"Okay, well, can you give this to him?" She yanked her green backpack onto her lap and rifled through it to produce a sort of thick red envelope. I plucked it from the girl's purple painted nails, which I should've chided her for, and looked at the loopy scrawl on the front. It just said my son's name but I swear there was a tiny, weeny little heart at the end of the 'Y'. She noticed my securitizing gaze and the blush deepened on her chocolate brown skin.

"I, uh, am going to go Miss…" her words were all jumbled in awkwardness.

"No wait, what is it? Wait, I don't even know you're name, wait," The girl zipped up her bag and slung it onto her back, pulling out her beautiful curly hair that got trapped between the piece of luggage and her back.

"It's a 'get well' card plus a party invitation Ms Swan,"

"Ah," I slipped the card into my handbag that sat by my feet and smiled at the girl who awkwardly wrung her hands.

"And, sorry what's your name? Just so I can tell Henry,"

"I'm Claudia, Miss," Fuck yeah, that's who she was. Henry had mentioned her a while ago. He was moderately confused at why this girl would be in a fit of giggles when he was around or she'd offered him help in his Maths class. She had a crush on my bloody oblivious son. Oh the poor thing.  
"Okay Claudia, thanks,"

"Cheers Miss," Claudia waved at me as she left the room. I wanted to desperately open the letter but I knew better than that; Henry would probably choke me with my own hair if given the chance.

* * *

The bell for the next class went off and Mary Margaret practically collapsed on the massive dinner table thingy that sat right in the middle of the staffroom, "I swear you never have class".

"Perks of being a sub I guess," I winked at her as she huffed at her fringe which sat lopsided on her forehead.

"Perks of being in the Principal's pants, you mean,"

Ah yes, I forgot that this 'thing' whatever the hell it was, was now common knowledge through the staff. Some thought I was a nutcase and others voiced their opinions that the reason Regina was such a stuck up bitch is because she hadn't been laid in however long. Apparently she's become tolerable ever since we started our regular lunch dates where each other's faces were the lunch.

"That too,"

Mary Margaret just shook her head and peeled herself off the table just as David and the hottest bitch in all of Maine entered the room.

"Don't worry Mr Nolan, I will suspend little Ms Jackson. She has been nothing but troublesome since I let her into the school two years ago. I will have the forms for you soon," Regina gave David a curt nod and bee lined for my desk. Mary Margaret rolled her eyes at me as David pulled her aside to give her a hug and chat away at whatever the hell 'Ms Jackson' did to agitate him to the point of suspension.

"Hello dear," Regina smiled and I still couldn't believe my fucking luck. She was so damn hot and perfect and that she picked me to get freaky with in between sheets. Not that we've actually been properly freaky between sheets yet; we've literally done it everywhere but the in the actual bed. We've done in on top of the sheets but not in between sheets. Well shit.

"Hey you," I leaned my head back and grinned stupidly up at the brunette. She squeezed my cheeks between her hands and pecked me on the lips. It was like a super cute lesbian version of the upside down Spiderman kiss.

"I've been thinking…" Regina perched herself on the edge of my desk,

"Op, be careful now…"

"What are you doing tomorrow morning?"

"Um, working?"  
What the fuck? It was Friday tomorrow and if she thought I would be anything than sleeping in, working minimal hours then going home to play Mario Kart with Henry, she's got another thing coming for her.

"No Ms Swan, I mean, you have no class until ten, what are you doing then?"

"Sleeping, what else?"

"Maybe breakfast with me?" Oh for fuck sake.

"Wait, like a _date_?"

Regina shrugged her shoulders and quickly glanced at the door as Astrid Nova walked in with a love-struck Leroy trailing behind.

"Yes, very much like a date,"

"Oh, I um…" Regina raised an eyebrow at me. Great now it sounded like I didn't want to go on a date, "no I mean, yes, I'd like, I mean love to go on a date with you but…"  
"But what dear,"

My ego was going to take a pounding, "I wanted to ask you for out for our first date," I mumbled. Regina grabbed my hand that rested on the table and squeezed it; her thumb making soothing circle motions.

"You're going to have to be quicker next time,"  
"Next time?" I squeaked. Shit, shit she wanted more dates.

"Well yes dear, that's what people do when two people are dating,"

"Oh yes, right, okay, sure," We're dating now? When did this happen? Did _I_ want it to happen? Of course I wanted it to happen, this is Regina _fucking_ Mills for crying out loud.

"Emma you're rambling,"

"I know, I'm just nervous; I wasn't planning on this, and now I have to plan what I'm wearing and if it's going to be appropriate for the work day ahead and,"

"Shut up Ms Swan,"

"Sorry,"  
"And plus, when have you ever considered the school dress code, I mean…" she motioned to my current outfit and kissed me on the cheek when I snorted, "it's too casual for work Ms Swan, but I like it,"

"Regina, I explained to you this morning, I forgot to wash my sport shorts and staff shirt and it won't happen again,"

She laughed, "I'm just playing with you Emma, I don't care what staff wear as long it's not a French maid outfit,"

"Can you wear a French maid outfit?" I purred as I rested my hand on her knee, kneading the skin softly.

"Last time I checked it was you who could speak French so it seems only fit that you wear one,"

"Yeah but you'd look hot in a French maid outfit… I didn't,"

"What do you mean, 'I didn't'?" Regina sidled closer and rested her heeled feet on my thigh.

"When I was younger, I worked in a strip club of sorts and dressing up as a maid and 'cleaning the club' was one of my first assigned jobs,"

"Is that how you learnt how to dance like you did at the School Disco?"  
"Yeah," I was a little bit embarrassed to be completely honest.

"Well," she tucked a loose strand of hair behind me ear and cupped my cheek, "if I bought you one, would you wear it for me?"

I had to suppress a groan considering we were in the staffroom where other teachers were.

"Yeah, maybe…" I leaned forward and there was a loud throat clearing from somewhere behind us. Regina sighed, "What!"

"Keep your PDA to a minimum won't you girlies?" Leroy ruffed.

"Keep _what_ to a minimum?" Regina asked me curiously,

"PDA; public display of affection," I clarified. Regina furrowed her eyebrows,

"Oh" she turned to Leroy, "my apologies, Leroy,"

He gave the Principal a grimaced smiled and turned back to Astrid who was struggling to fit one corner of her massive sandwich into her tiny mouth.

"So, tomorrow morning at that café down at the harbour?" Regina cooed as she picked her feet off my legs and crossed them. Hell yeah to her skirt riding up higher up on her thigh.

"Okay," I licked my lips as I watched her play with the hem of her skirt. She knew I was watching. I glanced over to the other teachers and they were all preoccupied with either marking or trying to fit food inside their mouths. I placed my hand higher up on her knee; the tips of my fingers sitting just underneath the hem.

"Ms Swan…" Regina warned as she narrowed her eyes.

"What?"

"Don't,"  
"Why not?"

"Because," she slapped my hand but cupped my chin affectionately, "there are people here and as Leroy stated, we must lower our PDA," Regina pressed her lips against mine but left them on long enough to warrant Leroy throwing a ball of paper at the back of Regina's head.

* * *

Fucking fuck mother of fuck. This was happening. I sat in a goddamn café and waited for Regina in the wee hours of the morning because heaven forbid I turn up late. The waitress was yawning profusely when I rocked up just as she flipped the 'open' sign on the glass door. I didn't order anything except for a glass of water that I had downed the moment she put it on the little table that I picked. It sat facing the harbour and I watched the seagulls nip at each other while Regina's Mercedes Benz zipped past and swung gracefully into an empty park next to my freshly-washed bug. I spent all of yesterday afternoon cleaning my car instead of marking work and if that wasn't procrastination at its finest, then I don't know. I hated cleaning my car, but I hated marking the other half of Mary Margaret's illiterate History class, more.

I watched Regina Mills lock her car and stalk into the building. I picked at the collar of my purple blouse and kept my eyes on an interesting looking knot in the wooden table. Did this woman ever not wear heels? I mean, I could hear her a mile away.

"Morning dear," I forgot how delightful she sounded in the early morning.

"Morning; I'm surprised you made it," I grinned as she slid into the other chair. It wasn't even seven in the morning and she was done with my shit. Regina sighed,

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" She reached over and finished the last drops of my water.

"That night you stayed at mine…you looked like you could've done with a few more hours sleep. And if I quote correctly, 'how are you a morning person?'"

She motioned for the waitress to come over before turning to me, "You wore me out the night before Ms Swan, what did you expect?"

The waitress cleared her throat. Well shit she heard that last bit. I felt my cheeks burn brightly as I grasped clumsily at a menu and held it right up so I couldn't see either of the women.

"I'll have the pancakes with everything dear," I peeped over the top of my menu and noticed Regina hadn't even picked one up. She just sat there with her arms crossed and her chest puffed out.

"Oh and a black coffee with two sugars please," The waitress quickly jotted down the request on a tiny notepad and flicked her eyes to me,

"And what can I get you?"

Shit, I hadn't even looked at the menu. Toast…Porridge…Bacon and Eggs…Cereal…Pancakes… and hell yeah, Eggs Benedict.

"Eggs Benedict, please," I beamed up at the tired woman and handed her the laminated menu.

"Any drinks?"

"Uh, green tea please,"

"Sure," she shoved the notepad back into the front pocket of her grey apron and stuck the pen into her hair bun. The waitress took the menus and no doubt went back to an extra strength coffee she had hidden behind the counter.

* * *

I drummed my fingers nervously against the table as Regina finished off the last of her pancakes.

"I still can't believe you ate all of that,"

Regina opened her mouth widely and her pink tongue quickly licked the dripping portion of pancake and bacon goodness covered in maple syrup. She poked it into her mouth and smiled innocently.

"I mean, for a small woman, you sure as hell can eat a lot,"

"Excuse me dear, you finished off your eggs and then proceeded to eat half of one of my pancakes,"

"You weren't eating it!" my voice went up a few octaves.

"Doesn't mean it gives you permission to eat it," she mopped up the remaining syrup with the last bit of pancake and stuck it in her mouth before laying the cutlery side by side in the middle of the plate.

"It's habit; I eat my son's food,"

"Well maybe you should invite him along to one of our food dates and steal from him then," she patted her lips with a napkin and acted melancholy like the idea of Henry joining breakfast was as easy and care free as taking a dog for a walk.

"You _want_ Henry to join us?"

"Of course Ms Swan," Regina folded the napkin and placed it on top of her plate.

"But…but…but," I stammered. I was the one who was meant to be acting fast, not her. Not Regina.

"But what,"

"It's Henry!" I squeaked. The waitress looked at me weirdly as I leaned closer to Regina, "you want to have breakfast or lunch or dinner with Henry and me?"

"Yes,"

She didn't even explain it. She didn't _do_ anything but state the word 'yes' proudly and bat her eyelids at me once. My insides were going to jelly while she subtly licked her teeth clean with her tongue without a care in the world.

"Hmm, how about you and your son come to my house this weekend for the afternoon and if you son doesn't want to strangle me at the end of the evening, you two stay for dinner, stay the night and maybe you and I can do something a little bit… _extra_,"

"I…_what_,"

"Yes or no Emma,"

"Yes… but…" the waitress cleared our plates and Regina stood up almost immediately, flourishing her credit card at the other woman. I was still seated and still fucking dumbstruck.

"We are going to be late for work," Regina collected her things and stuck her nose in the air impatiently.

"Regina!" My shirt stuck to the armrest of the chair and I almost took it out the front door. Shit. This woman was intolerable and I don't know why the fuck I hang around with her.

By the time I made it out of the café, tucking in my shirt, Regina was sitting in her car, with a smile like the Cheshire cat and the engine running idly.

"Oh it's ever so fun to rile you up Ms Swan," she beamed. Ugh, I loved her to bits and I wanted to either literally punch her in the face or punch her in the face with my mouth. I clamped my hands down her car window and glowered at her.

"We are going to be late," she kissed me on the underside of the chin and clicked the button to wind up the windows. I couldn't help but smirk as the window shut. She poked her tongue out at me as she reversed out onto the main road and whizzed up towards the school.  
Yep, Regina Mills was going to kill me.

* * *

a/n: FELT LIKE WE NEEDED CUTE SWEN MOMENTS.  
DON'T WORRY YOU LITTLE SHITS, WE WILL BE HAVING RAUNCHY SEXY TIMES BUT ALSO CUTE TIMES. it's like a fucking win-win with this fic, aye? hahaha x


	21. Chapter 21

a/n: not one of my finest chapters considering I wrote this in like an hour and it's up without proof reading but hey, it's got cute emma/henry and sexy times so...what more do y'all want? :D  
I FEEL LIKE IT'S A BIT RUSHED, I'M SORRY.  
Emma x ( .com)

* * *

"Shortie got those apple bottom jeans…jeans, boots with the fur, with the fur,"

I sang ridiculously out of key while I cooked dinner. It must have sucked to be Henry right now because he was bed-bound. Ha. I flicked the volume of the song up higher on my iPhone and jutted out my hips, readying myself for a serious round of twerking.

"Mum!"

I dismissed Henry muffled complaining and stuck my tongue out for some ass shaking,

"She turned around and gave that big booty a smack, ay!" I threw my hands up happily, "she hit the floor… she hit the floor,"

It was like being back in the strip club all over again.

"Next thing you know…shortie gat…"

Suddenly the song was cut short but that didn't stop me from singing the last little bit, "shortie got low, low, low, low, low, low, low…low,"  
"_Mum_!"  
"What!"

I glanced over to my phone to see Henry holding it, wrapped up in a blanket, glaring at me, "oh, hey kid,"

"Mum," his eyes were slits.

"Yeah," I cleared my throat and leaned back against the counter like I hadn't just done some kick ass twerking that would make Maine's finest exotic dancer jealous…possible slight overreaction there but nonetheless. He motioned his chin towards the cooker,

"Dinner's burning,"

Ah yes, the sweet stench of overcooked eggs.

"Shit," I launched myself forward and frowned at the blackened mix.

"If you had listened to me instead of attempting to twerk, I would've told you that it was burning,"

Jesus, Henry was turning into a little male version of Regina. I'll only worry when he starts calling me 'dear'.

"Ah, right," I prodded the eggs and deemed them inappropriate for human consumption. I lifted the pan off the cooker and smiled as I offered the goo to my son,

"Mm, nutritious…" I waggled my eyebrows at him and jiggled the pan so the eggs shook like they were frightened. Henry shook his head and opened the second drawer to reveal my not so secret horde of takeout menus. He picked them up and splayed them out on the counter.

"Indian…Chinese…Pizza…Kebabs…" he picked each one up and showed them to me as my phone pinged, signalling a text message. Yay, someone loved me. I scooped up the phone and of course the text from Regina.

'_Hi dear, just wondering if Henry was feeling any better x_'

Was that a kiss at the end? I brought the phone closer to my eyes. Yes, a definite kiss. Success, we have reached a new relationship milestone.

"Is that Ms Mills?" Henry searched the fridge for some kind of snack food.

"How'd you know?" my fingers danced over the screen, trying to figure out a witty comeback.

"You're smiling like an idiot," Damn.

"She's wondering how you are," I tapped away, my thumbs flying.

"Tell her I'm dying from hunger,"

"Can do,"

'I almost killed him with my cooking so I think he was in better condition before dinner'

I grinned at my intelligent and witty reply and showed it to Henry. The message came up as 'seen' and the little loading reply box popped up. Shit that was quick.

'_Why does that not surprise me Ms Swan?_'

'Excuse me, you survived my dinner…' Message Seen,

_'If I remember correctly, you burnt the vegetables and I actually made dinner.'_

Oh fuck, that's right.

'Oh yeah…'

I could almost hear the sigh that Regina would be exhaling at this point as the reply box bopped away.

"Indian…?" Henry asked hopefully. I peeled my eyes off the screen,

"Huh, what…oh right, hold on," I waved my hand at him feebly as he sighed and rolled his eyes.

'_If you can keep your son alive for the next twenty minutes, I will grace you with the best chicken soup that has ever existed_'

My stomach exploded with butterflies. Holy shit Regina was coming here. Hell yeah and hell no.

"How'd you feel about chicken soup…it's meant to be good for sickness and stuff," my voice cracked violently at the end.

Henry eyed me suspiciously, "why?"

"Uh, Regina has some and would like to come over,"

Henry shrugged, "yeah sure, why not". The son approves.

'I have kept him alive for the past thirteen years, I'm sure I can do another twenty minutes'

Boom, sassy Swan strikes again.

'_Don't jinx yourself dear_. _See you in twenty_'

* * *

Henry had said it was comical the way I threw my phone onto the couch, huddled over the small coffee table and sprinted into my bedroom, tearing off my sweatpants and ratty tank top as I went. It was sheer desperation.

I yanked a comb through my curls and ripped apart my dresser for my navy silk pyjama bottoms, push up bra and that frilly grey singlet I bought on a whim in a sale. I donned the entire outfit and applied some chap stick because fuck kissing Regina Mills with chapped lips.

"Whoa Mum…" Henry grinned at me as I padded out into the kitchen, fluffing my hair down over my boobs just so I don't frighten the kid.

"Got to dress to impress, hey?" I did a quick once over of the kitchen and lounge room and reasoned it okay for Regina.

There was a blinding light outside and I almost shat myself. She was here. _Regina was here_.

"Henry, for god sake, act like you're dying," I squeaked, ushering him into the lounge room and pushing him down into the couch, throwing a pile of blankets on him before he could retaliate. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I skidded into the kitchen and straightened things up before there was a soft knock at the door. Let's do this. Come on, I just twerked proudly to Apple Bottom Jeans.

I whipped open the door just as Regina was about to knock again.

"Hey!" I said maybe a tad bit too enthusiastically. She raised an eyebrow to me and I let myself check her out; tight jeans, killer heels and a red blouse with her tits poking ever so slightly out. Hell yeah.

"Good evening dear," Her hungry eyes stopped at my excellent cleavage and I noticed a small weekend bag hanging at her side. Someone was going to get laid tonight, and that someone was me.

"Come in, come in," I waved my hand at her and Henry coughed extraordinarily loudly to notify Regina of his presence.

Regina moved more cautiously, keeping her eyes trained on the breathing lump on the couch.

"...And you'll notice on the left, a rare species of teenager called 'dying from the cold'" I cleared my throat and prodded Henry harshly in what I assumed was his arm.

"_Ow_!"

"Say hello to Regina, you little shit," Regina smiled at my term of endearment.

"Hi Ms Mills," he chirped,

"Hello Henry, I heard you weren't feeling good so I brought over some chicken soup for you,"

"Oh, uh, thanks Ms Mills,"

Clearly Henry was out of his comfort zone so he pulled the blanket higher up to his chin and snuggled harder into his pillow.

"They don't call him charming for nothing," I sighed as we ventured into the kitchen. I turned my back briefly to Regina to get some kind of dish for the soup and I felt her warm hands on my stomach and her breath on the back of my neck.

"Ms Swan, I was worried for a second that Henry may have answered the door so I acted as reserved as I could,"

We went from talking about how charming Henry was to suddenly this. I liked it.

"And how'd that go?"

"I wanted to fuck you the moment that door flew open I saw how flushed your cheeks were and how your breasts heaved," it was like creative dirty talk and Christ, it worked. I felt one of her hands glide up to cup one of my boobs and the other flitted down to the hem of my trousers, tugging at the drawstring.

"Well, I…" Regina ran her tongue over the shell of my ear and good Lord, I would have slammed her back into the pantry door and had her right there if it wasn't for the small fact my son was a few metres away. The very same tongue licked my earlobe and trailed down the back of my neck before teeth nipped at my skin and it soothed it. Just as I let out a little whimper, Regina unwrapped herself off of me and popped her bag up on the counter like nothing happened. Fuck, okay, I see how this night is going down. She wasn't going to do anything while my son was up and about, so it was definitely time to whip out the sneaky Swan charm.

She pulled out a portable soup container and a bottle of what looked like liquid aspirin. I rubbed myself up against her back and felt her chest tighten as I left a kiss on her shoulder.

"You know I am fully capable of giving Henry aspirin right?" I quipped as she checked the temperature on the soup. I reached down in between us and squeezed one of her butt cheeks. Regina flinched slightly, but not enough. I lowered my hand ever so slightly until my fingers were practically in between both butt cheeks and I squeezed again. She yelped as my fingers made contact with her rather well heated core. She cleared her throat as if she was completely unperturbed by it.

"Mm, of course my dear, but you don't have this," She swapped me the aspirin for the bowl I held. I pulled away and attempted to read the label but to no avail.

"What is this shit? Is it even legal?" I frowned at the woman. There was no way in hell I was feeding this to my kid if I didn't even what the hell it was.

"Hush Emma, it's an organic mixture that my father created,"

"Uh huh, organic…" I sneered but Regina looked at me blankly,

"For the record, my father is a well-known Naturopath in Puerto Rico and supplied me with this while I was over there and happen fall ill,"  
"Oh," now I seemed like a total bastard, "you're Puerto Rican?"

"Half," she emptied the contents of the container into the bowl and I was hit with the heavenly smell of roasted chicken.

"Can you speak…like, Puerto Rican?" Fuck if I knew what they spoke. They could speak English for all I knew.

Regina deadpanned and rolled her eyes,

"_Los puertorriquenos hablan espanol que adorable idiota, _Puerto Rican's speak Spanish you adorable moron,"

I stared at her wide eyed. That was hot as fuck. Fuck French.

"Okay, I heard the word 'idiot' and 'Spanish' so clearly you speak Spanish in Puerto Rico and you called me an idiot,"

"I called you an adorable idiot but well done Ms Swan," Regina replied sarcastically as she popped a spoon into the bowl.

"Time to feed your son; hopefully that'll keep him entertained for the next, hmm, I don't know, fifteen minutes…" she looked me up and down, "and who knows what _I'm_ capable of doing in fifteen minutes dear,"

Regina left me hot and flustered inside my own kitchen. She was a force to be reckoned with.

"Here we are Henry, one big bowl of steaming hot chicken soup," Regina cooed and there was loud plonk as she put it on the coffee table.

"Cheers Ms Mills,"

Regina's heels clicked loudly on the tiled floors and she entered the kitchen and stared at me like she hadn't had sex in four years.

"Regina, I,"

The damn woman shut me up with her lips. They were hungry and angry and holy fuck, desperate. I tried to push her up against the pantry but clearly, she had different ideas. She waggled her forefinger in front of my face and guided me backwards until my butt hit the edge of the counter.

"Regina, Henry can see us," I whispered as her fingers pulled at the hem of my silk trousers.

"Oh no dear, he can see your back but he will not be seeing what I do," Regina kissed her way down my neck and yanked up my singlet to kiss my flat stomach. Fuck, fuck, oh no, oh fuck. The brunette squatted and kneaded the skin of my thighs as I sucked in a breath through clenched teeth,

"Your job is to make sure I don't get interrupted because heaven forbid, we scar your child,"

Sex in that French lingerie shop was risqué but this was on a whole new level. My son was in the next room and before I could even raise a complaint, Regina pulled my pants down around my knees and buried her face into the apex of my thighs.

Jesus Christ her tongue was the reincarnation of the devil and I was sinning like a motherfucker. I glanced down and wished I hadn't because Regina's eyes were big, brown and way too innocent for the lewd act she was bestowing upon me.

I flung my head back as her tongue hit a rather sweet spot and I had to muster all my self-control to not cry out. I rested myself back on my elbows as Regina settled herself down on her butt. Casual kitchen sex, fuck yeah.

"Mum?"

Oh god, I was in heaven.

"Mum!"

"Y-yeah," oh shit. I watched Henry move about and stand up. Oh no. I patted furiously at Regina's hands that held my thighs apart but she didn't stop. I somehow twisted my body so it looked like I was leaning forwards on the counter as Henry approached. My face must have been a flustered sight.

"Uh are you okay Mum?"

"Yep, yep, definitely, I'm fine," I squeaked as Regina rearranged herself to suit the new situation. Henry narrowed his eyes suspiciously as he went to step around into the kitchen.

"Stop," I screamed. I wasn't sure if it was aimed at Henry or Regina or hell, both.

"Don't come in here Henry," I gasped as Regina sucked hard on my clit.

"Why?"

"Because…because," because Regina was fucking me right now, Jesus, what was I meant to say? "Uh, Regina spilt some soup in here and I don't want you to slip,"

Smooth one Swan.

"Oh, okay, um, can I at least get some ice cream?"

"No, no, that's," fuck Regina stuck a finger inside of me and I gasped and fell heavily forwards onto the counter, "that's not a good idea, you're sick, here,"

Henry stared at me as I grasped weakly at the bottle of Regina's magical potion thing and handed it to him, "Take…take, uh, a swig and go lie back down," Regina added another finger and I was slowly losing the plot as my son sniffed the concoction before sculling a gulp of it. Henry smiled and ambled back to the couch as I practically collapsed my whole weight onto Regina's face. She groaned into me as I came closer to the edge.

"Do it, Emma,"

"I can't…I mustn't…my son…"

Regina leaned over and snatched the tea towel from the oven door and shoved up in the direction of my mouth; all without removing her mouth from my centre,

"Bite on it and come for me dear,"

I jammed the towel into my mouth and almost choked on the taste of dishwashing liquid, old food and dirty water.

"Do it now, Ms Swan…"

I chucked my head back as her mouth covered my entire wet pussy. Regina's fingernails scraped up on my tender thighs as she finished me off, licking my juices from my tender skin.

"You're a fucking goddess Regina," I gasped as Regina stood up, smiling and wiping the last remnants of me off her lips.

"What Mum?" Henry called from the lounge room.

"Nothing kid, go back to your movie…"

* * *

a/n: do i apologise for this chapter? i have no idea what to think, seriously...  
reviews would be delightful :D xo y'all fab


	22. Chapter 22

a/n: oh ho ho! y'all wanting Regina's birthday and I can only apologise for holding out on you. so as a form of apology, I give you the cutest, adorablest, fluffiest, sassiest swan-mills family moments that I can currently muster. BIRTHDAY WILL HAPPEN, I SWEAR TO THE LORD ABOVE. p,s this is going to be a long ass motherfucking fic if I write it out like how I planned it. So hope y'all okay with that...  
Also thank you so so much for all the reviews and favourites! It's so fabulous wow. You're all great.  
ALSO IF YOU WANT TO PROMPT ME FOR FICLETS OR WHATEVER, HIT ME UP AT TUMBLR.  
Emma xoxoxoxx (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

"Get the hell out of my way, you little shit,"  
"No, screw you Ms first place,"

"Oh, oh, I see how it's going to go down,"

I leaned forward eagerly with the black wireless Xbox remote in my clammy hands. I shook it violently, hoping that it would spur on the little mushroom man I picked. There was a whirring noise and suddenly my character exploded into a plume of blue smoke and Henry's green dinosaur shot in front.

"What the hell!" I screamed at Henry, "who uses a Blue Shell on their Mother?" I seethed, turning my glare back to the television screen.

"I do," Henry giggled as he dodged a banana skin as I hit a weapon box thingy. The box clicked over until I hit the flying bullet.

"Eat this dinosaur dude," I stated proudly as my character turned into a bullet and took out four other racers including my son's.

"Mum! That's so not fair," Henry whined as I shot over the finish line and raised my arms in triumph into the air.

"Who cares? I won, wee! Go mushroom man," I poked my tongue out at Henry and glanced at the clock; 4:57p.m. Oh shit. Henry sighed and turned off the console with the click of a button,

"He's name is Toad and mine was called Yoshi," He took my controller off me and stacked them back on top of the machine. I stood up and stretched, yanking up my jeans in the process.

"Whatever, I still kicked your butt at Mario Kart,"

"One time Mum, one time,"

"And you'll bet your little butt that I'll remind you constantly…hmm, maybe I'll tell Regina tonight?"

"I don't think she'll care to be honest; this is Ms Mills we're talking about,"

"The woman is extraordinarily competitive. I'm sure she'll want to know she's dating the finest Super Mario Kart racer in all of Maine,"

Henry rolled his eyes as I opened the fridge and put the chilled bottle of white wine into a cooler bag. Suddenly he started laughing,

"Can you imagine if Ms Mills was actually really good at Mario Kart? Like, super good and kicked both our butts,"

An idea sprung into my tiny brain. That's it.

"Henry, that's genius. We should take the Xbox to Regina's…"

Henry's eyes widened and he grinned mischievously, "yes! I mean, I hope she won't mind…"

But I grabbed my phone and opened up my messages to Regina,

'Feeling competitive?'

"Go stick it all in a bag and then go get ready alright kid?" I smiled at him as the message read 'seen'.

'_Depends what I'm competing for dear_'

'The royal title of supreme excellent ruler in Mario Kart'

_'…bring it on Swan'_

I grinned stupidly at the electronic device in my hands as I headed into my bedroom.

'Sweet' I tugged my grotty shirt off over my head and replaced it with a well-fitting black tee shirt, denim jacket, a scarf and a pair of flats. My phone pinged again.

_'I'll have you know, I always win'_

I snorted and threw the phone back down onto my bed, "oh babe, don't I know that,"

* * *

Regina actually lived closer to Ruby than I originally anticipated. Like, when she sent her address to me via text, I knew that her street was just off a main road in the next town over. Ruby lived in super expensive land, whereas Regina lived next door in semi-super expensive land.

But as I pulled up to Regina's, I realised that her house, no mansion, shat all over Ruby's fancy little pad. I double checked the text; yep, 108 Mifflin Street.

"Holy shit," Henry whispered. I didn't even get angry at him because I was also about to mutter the same words.

"Holy shit indeed," I cleared my throat, unplugged myself from the seat, got out and opened Henry's door before he started drooling all over the window.

"Come on kid, let's do this," Henry grabbed the Xbox from beside him and hauled himself up to Regina's front door with me trailing behind.

We waited with bated breath. Henry had knocked loudly and there was a small yelp from inside. Hopefully Regina hadn't stabbed herself or this would be shit start to the evening. The door swung inwards and Regina stood looking majestic in her casual jeans, grey tee shirt and bare feet. But to tie the entire outfit up nicely, she wore a dorky apron that outshined mine and her glasses were pushed up into her hairline. She was fucking gorgeous. Regina and I stared at each other for a good thirty seconds in silence before Henry cleared his throat and motioned to the heavy Xbox in his tiny hands.

"Hi Ms Mills,"

"Oh, h-hi, hello Henry, glad you could come," Regina peeled her eyes off me and smiled down at my son who looked like he was struggling with the weight of the device without trying to look like it was actually that heavy. How strange that like twenty four hours ago, Regina was completely seductive and was making a fucking feast out of my pussy, and now she stood, barefoot, adorable and slightly flustered in a dang fifties styled pink frilly apron.

"I'm happy I came, your house is super cool," Henry said gleefully as Regina pointed out the lounge room for him to dump the machine.

Regina stepped closer to me, "hey,"

It was so casual and so freaking perfect that I stuttered, "h-hello,"

"Nervous?" Regina cupped my face with her hands and her breath smelt like extra strength spearmint toothpaste,

"A little," I shrugged as melancholy as possible but Regina shut me up with her lips.

"No need to be dear, just be yourself and keep your dirty shoes outside…"

I didn't realise that I had somehow entered Regina's hallway, fully-shoed,

"I will _not_ having you tracking mud through this pristine clean house, Ms Swan,"

I rolled my eyes and flung my shoes out the front door. They hit a marble pillar and piled nicely on top of each other.

"Way to ruin the cute little moment we had there Regina,"

"No worries dear," Regina swung the door shut and sauntered into the kitchen, straight past Henry who was staring open mouthed at the giant screen that Regina called her television.

* * *

"Oh my god, I'm so full I could _die_," Henry leaned backwards and rubbed his food baby affectionately. He puffed out his cheeks and blushed as Regina laughed. She patted his hand and looked at me.

"Well Ms Swan, aren't you a delight to look at," her voice dripped with sarcasm. I was in the exact same position as Henry except I was prodding my protruding stomach and grimacing.

"Eyes bigger than your bellies…" Regina smirked as she grabbed our dishes and piled them up, "shame, I had some delicious banana and toffee ice cream…"

"Wait," I put my hand on Regina's forearm as Henry smiled brightly at his Head Mistress, "banana and toffee ice cream?"

Regina deadpanned at me as I shifted my weight, "I might…I might have enough room for that,"

Regina rolled her eyes and pried my fingers off her arm before heading into the kitchen, hopefully to get the ice cream. Henry licked his lips over exaggeratedly as Regina returned holding a tub of expensive looking ice cream, two bowls, spoons and two ciders.

"Hell yeah," I grabbed a spoon and shovelled out a massive chunk into Henry's bowl and slid it over to him. Regina just sat there, watching me, sipping her cider.

"This is so good," Henry groaned as a piece of toffee stuck to his top lip. Regina raised an eyebrow at me as I spooned some heaven into my mouth.

"How do you do it?" Regina shook her head.

"Us Swans can eat our weight in food and not gain a single kilo, it's great,"  
Henry slurped at the melting ice cream in his spoon, "yeah, it's like being a cow; we have like, four stomachs,"

I smiled at my child across the table as Regina huffed.

"Breakfast food stomach, snack food stomach, dessert stomach and chicken stomach," Henry droned as if he'd rattled the list off a thousand times already,

"Chicken stomach…?" Regina asked quizzically,

"I can eat so much chicken, it's ridiculous. It's like, having a bottomless pit for a stomach," my spoon clacked loudly against the ceramic bowl as I tried to get the last dregs,

"I see…" Regina took another sip of her cider, contemplating my statement.

* * *

"Okay, now I'm officially so full I could die," Henry sat back again and closed his eyes as he rubbed his belly.

"You did well son, you did well," I said proudly as I grabbed the other cider from Regina and sipped it so it wouldn't upset my bulging stomach.

"Holy, this is so good," I stared at the blank brown bottle and peeked into it. Regina nodded her head in acknowledgement, "thank you, I made it myself,"  
"Really? Wow," I took another sip and winced as the alcohol mingled uncomfortably with the ice cream.

"So was that ice cream,"  
I was impressed. Henry looked at Regina like she just answered all his prayers.

"Let me guess, so was dinner?" I rolled my eyes. There was no way that was all organic and homemade. Regina just smiled.

"No…_really_?"

"Yes really," Regina's grin got wider as my mouth dropped.

"Well fuck me," I quickly slapped my hands over my mouth and glanced at Henry. He rolled his eyes as Regina leaned forward, her lips brushing my ear,

"That's the plan dear,"

Shit. My eyes widened dramatically and Henry looked at me weirdly, "what, what did she say?"

"I, uh…" fuck. But Regina saved the day,  
"I was just telling her that I'm going to kick her butt at Mario Kart,"  
Henry's eyes narrowed his eyes. I was worried he'd knew that she lied but thank the Lord, he stood up and stuck his nose in the air, "we'll see about that Ms Mills," and stalked off to the lounge room to set up for the war that was bound to happen.

* * *

"This game is preposterous,"  
"You're in first place, shut up babe,"

"Can you both shut up and accept the fact I'm about to own your butts with this squid?"

"No," Regina and I said at the same as Henry set the inking squid on us.

"Oh for Pete's sake Mr Swan," Regina growled as our screens were covered in splats of ink, hindering our driving. Henry's stupid dinosaur, Yoshi, shot forward, taking over my green capped Luigi and Regina's weird little red thing that had a scary chainsaw mask on. Apparently he was called Shy Guy.

"I don't like this game anymore," Regina huffed as she recrossed her legs and set Shy Guy after Princess Peach's butt.

"You don't like it because you're not winning anymore," Henry mumbled as he leaned the same way Yoshi did. Regina glared at my son and rolled her eyes at me,

"He's your son, through and through, isn't he?"

I was too busy trying to overtake Bowser to even respond.

"Yeah, that's what Ms Blanchard said too,"

"Of course she did," Regina sneered and shot a Red Shell at poor Peach before zipping up close behind me and started tailgating. The clicking of our joysticks was the only sound for a good minute and a bit.

"I don't get it Miss, if you don't like Miss, why don't you just fire her?" As I tried to figure out which Miss was which, Regina smirked and overtook me,

"It's not that easy Henry, and anyway, who says I don't like Ms Blanchard?"

"Come off it Ms Mills, everybody knows," Henry leaned forward, sticking his tongue out as he laid out three Banana Skins. I glanced over to Regina and she looked flabbergasted.

"How…?"

"Face it, you're not exactly the Queen of Subtly when it comes to hating people," I laughed as I shot out a tonne of Green Shells; hoping one would at least hit Regina. But she simply glided through my assault.

"Oh really Ms Swan, is that so?"

"Yeah so Ms Mills," Henry took out Donkey Kong who was still a lap behind and flew over the finishing line in first place. Regina frowned at my son and edged closer to the screen.

"Damn it,"

"Like you really had a chance Miss," Henry stated matter-of-factly and watched the screen as Regina and I battled for second place.

Regina ended up coming second and I threw the controller down on the carpet like the true child I am. I glared at Luigi who was now sobbing next to a chuffed looking Shy Guy and that stupid dinosaur who was holding a gold cup. The moment after Henry left, stating he was off to finish off the container of ice cream, Regina tackled me. She hit my side with more oomph than I expected from a little brown haired woman. I hit the floor with a grunt and Regina snuggling into me like a giant super affectionate cat.

"Uh, hello," I rubbed her back soothingly as she entwined her legs with mine,

"Hello dear," she nuzzled into my neck and took a deep breath.

"And what can I do for you this evening Ms Mills,"

"Fuck me," Regina planted kisses up my neck and said it like it was the most innocent statement that left her lips.

"Oh," I frowned and Regina poked at the wrinkled skin on my forehead. I smoothed out my facial features and kissed her on the eyebrow.

"What? Wasn't that the plan for this evening…?"

"Yes but,"

Regina got up onto her elbows and stared down at me. That stare could have sent the average human running away but not me.

"Let me guess, you're on your period," Regina's eyes narrowed at me as mine opened to the size of dinner plates,

"What! No, of course not Regina, Jesus,"

"Then why not Ms Swan," she pouted as she kissed my lips like twelve times in quick succession, "I knew I should have worn something more…_alluring_," Regina bit her lip and pulled herself off me. How the literal fuck was Regina going to be more alluring? She was the actual definition of allure. I sat up and wrapped my arms around her shoulders, "no, no, trust me it's not that. I just…I just…want to get to know you and not base this entire relationship thing on sex,"

Okay that was super lame. Regina's eyes brightened and once again, she threw herself at me.

"Since when were you the gentleman,"

"Well she had to teach me _somehow_ didn't she?" Henry barged in, holding the container in one hand and a large spoon in the other. Regina yelped but Henry was clearly undisturbed by our moment of affection. Henry wiggled his butt before placing it down on Regina's couch,

"Can we watch a movie?" he shovelled more of the ice cream into his mouth.

"We should probably head off soon kid…"

Both Henry and Regina turned to me and gave me a glare. I raised my hands in surrender,

"You are not going home this evening Ms Swan, you are _clearly_ inebriated," Regina held me in an iron vice as Henry complained loudly,

"But Mum! I like it here…Miss has ice cream," He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world and shoved more of it into his already packed mouth. We had to stay because of ice cream.

"Fine, fine, _here_ it is," I huffed as Regina pulled me up onto her other couch; me and her on the loveseat and Henry and his tub of ice cream on the other.

"Now," Regina pointed a complicated looking remote at the screen, "How to Train Your Dragon?"

I was going to marry this woman; ice cream, cuddling, Mario Kart and animated films.

"Hell yeah," I said as I snuggled deeper into the woman's side. Henry whooped gleefully and settled himself in for the night ahead.

Yep. I was totally in love with Regina Mills.

* * *

a/n: if you have any ideas you want me to play with in this fic, sling 'em into my ask on tumblr or pm me on here.  
(ps to the lovely lass who suggested a regina/emma/ruby threesome, as DELIGHTFUL as that would've been, that is ONE of TWO sexual things i will not write; the other is anal, because literally, what the fuck). so to sum up, NO THREESOMES AND NO ANAL.  
okay? okay. good. excellent. hope you enjoyed that cavity induced cuteness.  
please pretty please review xo


	23. Chapter 23

a/n: oKAY fuCK I GET IT, YOU CAN'T GET MARIO KART ON XBOX. MY FAULT, I'M SORRY. fuck. okay, so like, there is roughly one or two chapters until BIRTHDAY SEX. aw yeah.  
thank you to everyone who have been sending me messages on tumblr, they make me so so happy. and shout out to the lovely reviews i have been getting, you are all great. every single one of you. (even if it is chastising me for my lack of nintendo/xbox knowledge hahaha)  
without further ado, the next chapter.  
come chat to me on tumblr guys, i'm nice and i fan girl when people send me messages saying they like my story.  
Emma (ant1ers. tumblr. com) xo

* * *

Some people wake up to the sunrise but that was not the case for me this morning. A fat pigeon smacked into the window right beside the couch, jolting me awake.

"Shit," I fell from the couch onto the carpeted floor and rubbed my eyes. The pigeon sat on the windowsill looking slightly dazed and in need of a serious diet.

"Jesus _Christ_, you stupid bird," I crawled up to the open window and prodded the bird through the taunt flyscreen. It stared at me and cooed.

"Ugh," I rested my forehead against the sill and froze when I heard a clatter behind me. Henry grumbled something in his sleep and there was another clatter. What the fuck did my son do last night? I turned and saw him spread eagled on Regina's other couch; his mouth wide open and smeared with ice cream. A spoon hung loosely from his fingers. He finished off the entire bucket of Regina's homemade banana and toffee ice cream. I wasn't surprised.

Regina, however, emitted a little squeak and curled up in foetal position, her sleepy hands and feet pressing into the warm leather I had recently occupied. It was fucking adorable. I watched her for a little while, not in a creepy way, but with a smile on my face wondering how the fuck I was so lucky to get her in my life. Not only that, but my son approved of her and she approved of him. We were like a little family and the idea of that didn't freak me out as much as I thought it should've; Mummy Swan, Mummy Mills and fat tub of lard Henry.

"_Swan_," Regina grunted. She's such a delight in the morning.

"Yes?"

Regina patted the space beside her, "here, now,"

Early morning Regina meant argumentative Regina and I was not having any of that. I wiggled my way into Regina's grasp and she sighed into my neck,

"I love you,"

I froze. She froze. Henry just snorted in his sleep and rearranged himself. Did she just? Did she just? _No_.

Regina's eyes flew open and she clutched her hands tightly around the back of my neck, somehow anchoring me to her body. The fear in her eyes suggested she was worried I would run. I was not going to.

"I mean, I'm sorry, it just slipped out…"

"No, no, calm down," I cupped her cheek and pressed my lips to her, "I love you too,"

"Really…?" I rolled my eyes,

"No, I _hate_ you; you're annoying and clinging in the mornings and I don't like the fact you own more Disney movies than I do and you don't even have a kid,"

Regina stared at me bewildered.

"Of course I love you back you stress merchant, sheesh," I kissed her on the forehead and tucked her head onto my chest, "also, kind of glad you broke the 'I love you' ice because I didn't want to come off as clingy," I shrugged and laughed as Regina bit my collarbone jokingly.

"You're infuriatingly cocky Ms Swan,"

"Stay away from my chicken Mr Banana Man!" Henry shouted. He launched the spoon out of his hand and it clattered onto the floor.  
I raised my eyebrows at my sleeping son and Regina stifled a laugh, "what the fuck just happened?"

"Apparently Mr Banana Man stole your son's chicken…" Henry growled some more and rolled himself closer to the back of the couch, "and clearly the whole notion of ruining precious moments seems to run through the family,"

* * *

I wasn't surprised when my son dragged himself from the lounge room the moment Regina set the bacon onto the cooker. He looked like a wreck. The kid had some serious bed hair as he trotted out holding the ice cream bucket whilst having bits of said ice cream stuck to his face.

"Aw man," Henry puffed out his cheeks and sat down at Regina's kitchen bench.

"Good morning Henry," Regina chirped as she shook the pan to flip the bacon.

"Morning Miss…Morning Mum,"

"Feeling alright kid?"

"No,"

"Ate too much ice cream?"

"Yeah,"

Regina just smiled as I patted my son's shoulder.

"Next time you'll remember,"

Regina lifted a single eyebrow to me, "oh so there's going to be a next time dear?"

But Henry cut in, "well yeah, duh, Mum like, _loves_ you and your food is so good,"

"And by food, he means ice cream," I clarified as Regina kissed me quickly on the jaw.

"So totally meant the ice cream,"

"Hmm, maybe I should make you your favourite flavour then Henry,"

Henry sat up in an instant, "really?"

"Oh no," I groaned,

"Yes really," She scooped the bacon onto a plate and pushed it between us,

"Don't encourage him Regina,"

"I'll do what I please," Regina huffed as she grabbed three forks and sat down in between Henry and me, "what flavour would you like?"

I rolled my eyes at Henry who looked like he was about to explode from all the available options.

"What can you do?" Henry shovelled two pieces of bacon into his mouth and chewed loudly.

"Whatever you want dear," Regina picked a small bit of meat and popped it between her lips. I just watched in awe as my two favourite people chatted about the simple thing of ice cream flavours. Things were going good.

"What about strawberry! No wait, that's too basic, um," He pondered as he stuck another piece of bacon, "Cho-late 'n sin-man,"

"What?"

Henry swallowed, "Chocolate and cinnamon,"

I frowned at his choice, "really kid? Chocolate and cinnamon,"

"Sounds delicious," Regina smiled as Henry poked his tongue at me.

"Sounds disgusting," I made a fake retching noise and Regina smacked me on the arm, "fine whatever; you two weird arse ice cream flavour enthusiasts go ahead and discuss your weird arse ice cream, I'm having a shower,"

Henry and Regina giggled as I popped my fork into the dishwasher. I wrapped my arms around Regina's neck and nuzzled into her hair,

"Ew Mum, PDA,"

"Oh! I know that one; Public Display of Affection," Regina said brightly.

"Yeah, and if you don't mind, can you lower it?" Henry fixed himself a glass of water and drunk heavily from it.

"Oh right, isn't that what Leroy said…?" Regina turned to me and I kissed her on the nose,

"Yeah,"  
Henry choked slightly on his water, "Sir said that? Ah ha, like he can talk!"

That caught both Regina's and my attention.

"What do you mean?"

"He and Ms Nova though," He smirked into his water. I sighed,

"If my thirteen year old son can pick up on it, heaven only knows who else has,"

Henry shrugged, "eh, no worse than Ms Blanchard and Mr Nolan,"

"Seriously, is all the staff I hired trying to jump each other's bones? Good grief, I'm going to have to start neutering people in a second,"

Henry burst out laughing as I rolled my eyes at the small brunette Principal in my arms.

"We're not neutering _anybody_ Regina, and that's final. Maybe just put an anti-PDA notice on the staffroom pin board or something,"

"Yeah, you've got strict rules for us students, so why don't you enforce it on the teachers?"

"Because we're adults Henry, we should be able to control ourselves," Regina gave me a knowing smirk,  
"Yeah… _should be_,"

* * *

I came out into the kitchen scrubbing my hair dry with Regina's towel. I know this because I forgot to grab one off of the woman so I resorted to her navy one hanging off the back of the bathroom door.

"Henry…Regina?"

There was a dull thud and Henry raced into the kitchen jumping around like fish flailing about on a fisherman's deck.

"Mum, mum, she's got the stuff!"

Regina chuckled lightly behind Henry as she bumped the door to the garage closed with her hip and she made her way into her own kitchen. I frowned at my erratic son and hot as fuck girlfriend.

"She's got what?"

"The stuff, the stuff," Henry squeaked loudly. I probably should have put two and two together when Regina dumped a plastic bag down on her counter.

"Wait, where did you go? What,"

"I made Miss take me to the corner store so we could buy chocolate and cinnamon,"

Regina unloaded the goods onto the counter as Henry tugged on my hand excitedly, "we're making ice cream!"

"Oh no," I sighed as Regina grinned at me, "are you trying to make me look like a cruddy parent?"

"Yep," Regina sang as she popped the cream and stuff into the fridge. Her arse looked great in jeans and even better when she bent over. I huffed and crossed my arms as Henry ran off to the bathroom, probably to relieve himself before he pissed himself from ice cream excitement.

"You know, you didn't need to drive him to the corner store, you could've said no,"

Regina cocked her head to the side as she studied the inside of her fridge, "I could've said no," she shrugged, "but I didn't,"

"Why not," I ran my fingers through my hair and dumped the wet towel onto the bench,

"Because,"

"Because why?"

"Drop it dear, I wanted to,"

"You actually wanted to spend a crazy amount of money on overpriced food from the local corner store?"

"Yes,"

"You're crazy," I shook my head as I wrapped my arms around her waist,

"I know and you love it," she leaned up and kissed me on the chin. I hummed happily.

* * *

"Now, be careful, and mix the cinnamon into the melted chocolate," Regina watched me with eager eyes as I poured the liquid cinnamon into the hot bubbling chocolate. Henry looked like he was gnawing on the corner of the marble countertop. He was slightly annoyed that I took his position as chocolate pourer, but I told him no because it was boiling hot and he was clumsy on the best of days.

"Careful…careful…" Henry mumbled. Aw how cute that he was looking out for me, "don't ruin the ice cream," of course, protect the _ice cream_.

Regina slipped underneath one of my outstretched arms and started stirring the mixture like the mad woman she was. I felt her perky butt on my thighs and damn, remember, there is a small child – my child- in the room.

"Is it done Miss, is it done… is it done?" Regina securitized the dairy based goo; lifting up the wooden spoon and watching it drip into the mixing bowl

"Yes, it's done Henry," Regina transferred the stuff to one of her cool ice cream containers and fended it off my son who kept trying to stick his dang fingers in it to taste it.

"When can we eat it? I want some now," Regina sighed and looked at me with her hands on her hips,  
"He's like a miniature, slightly more annoying version of you, isn't he?"

"Well yeah, he's my kid," I stated matter-of-factly.

"Excuse me; I am still in the room, geez," Henry slipped off his bar stool and wandered into the lounge room where he readied himself for another kick ass session of Mario Kart.

* * *

Regina had a thing for throwing herself adorably at me the moment Henry left the room. She collided with me at full force and I hit the pantry door with a loud thud.

"Jesus Regina, warn me next time,"

"No," She sounded like a stroppy five year old, "No I will not,"

"Why not,"

She grinned up at me mischievously, "I like the element of surprise,"  
"No shit," I kissed her slowly and Regina hummed.

"So Ms Swan,"  
"Yes Ms Mills?" She drew silly patterns in my shirt with her finger as she bit her bottom lip,

"It's my birthday next Friday,"

"I know," Oh boy didn't I know. I was so keen and ready to show her what the fuck I was capable of. I was chatting to Ruby every other day about what to do and what not to do. Regina tiptoed her fingers up my chest and knotted them into my hair,

"Are you going to give me a hint at what I'm getting?"

"And who says I'm getting you _anything_?"

Regina deadpanned as I laughed. She slapped me softly and squeezed one of her legs between both of mine.

"You better be getting me something,"  
"Oh I am, and you will love it,"

Regina perked up at this, "oh really?"

I cleared my throat and kissed her earlobe. I ran my tongue up and tickled the inside of the shell of her ear.

"Of course Head Mistress, I've been a bad girl and I'll need to be punished, all…day…long," I cooed.  
Regina groaned, "You know we have school on Friday right?"  
"You might…"

I had it all planned out. I was going to ruin Regina next Friday and no one was going to interrupt. Not even Malory Maleficent.

Her eyes widened, "what?"

"You heard me, Mistress Mills," I kissed her and her hum got considerably sexier once I sucked her lip into my mouth.

"I've just got to do a little shopping beforehand…" I guided Regina's mouth to my neck and she kissed it hotly.

"I'm intrigued Ms Swan,"

"You should be; I'm going to make your wish come true,"  
"And what wish would that be?"  
"Not telling," I winked.

* * *

a/n: aw look, they said i love you.  
aw look, emma's going to fuck the shit out of regina.  
aw look, y'all angry because i'm dangling BIRTHDAY SEX in front of your faces.  
mwahahaha xo


	24. Chapter 24

a/n: Is this appropriate moment to mention I'm actually not writing Emma or Regina or Ruby in character? they are all different sides of myself; Emma Swan is the dorky side of me, Ruby's mannerisms and speech are my own and Regina is the sassy business side of me hahaha whoops. Either way, you guys seem to like them all so I'll keep it up.  
This is chapter was a ball to write and it's also the pre-birthday sex chapter so hell yeah.  
ALSO THANK YOU ALL FOR THE REVIEWS AND MESSAGES ON TUMBLR. I LEGIT SQUISH MY FACE INTO MY PILLOW WHEN I READ THEM/ REPLY TO THEM.  
Enjoy, my lovely dumplings.  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

"Morning,"

An elderly woman who held the prestigious title of 'Granny' glanced up at me as I knocked on the door frame of the school's uniform shop.

"Ms Swan, what can I do for you?" She said it with the same tone someone would use when they're questioning why they were being disturbed by say, a fat slug. It wasn't like she hated me; Granny just hated everyone and especially being interrupted when she was clearly reading the newspaper. I knew this because Mary Margaret had been on the receiving end of one of Granny's outbursts which resulted in the old woman hitting the angelic History teacher upside the head with a rolled up newspaper. Never piss off this old woman.

"Has Henry grown out of his school uniform already?" she flattened the newspaper, licked her thumb and changed the page, scanning the sports section with feign interest.

"Uh no," I scratched the side of my open mouth awkwardly as the woman glanced up at me through wire rimmed glasses.

"No? Well then, is this a social visit?"

"Uh no, not that either,"

"Then why are you here,"

I had to think fast but my brain was clouded by the fumes of mothballs and that weird linen smell you get when you're in the same room as a shit tonne of freshly made uniforms.

"Hen-Henry has lost his jumper; just wondering if it would be in Lost and Found," I eyed the massive wooden crate to my left which had the words 'Lost and Found' spray painted on it in dark green. Granny tipped her head towards it, "go ahead," she lifted her feet up onto the desk and shook the newspaper before lifting it up so it covered her entire wrinkly face. Excellent, this would work a treat. I kneeled down at rummaged through the vast selection of odd socks, school hates, jumpers and lunch boxes. I felt like I needed a pair of rubber gloves when I pulled out some of the stuff.

"Bingo," I whispered under my breath as I yanked a chequered school skirt from the depths of the box.

"So you're not working at the canteen today?" I wasn't sure if small talk was out of the question but the way she dropped her newspaper and glared at me suggested otherwise.

"_Clearly_," the screaming students outside the building on break just solidified my stupid question.

"Sorry, I just…" I tried to backtrack as I whipped a plastic bag out of the back pocket of my jeans.

"No need for small talk Emma, just get what you need and get out," I know she didn't mean that as harshly as she said it because Lord knows she's got the social skills of a baboon.

I mumbled some apologies and kept pawing through the selection and found a small girl's blouse with a tie attached to it. Hell yeah, this was going to go down a treat with Regina. I took a whiff of it and shit, everything was going to need a serious wash. I stuffed the shirt and skirt into the bag as Granny looked at me suspiciously,

"Did you find it?"

"Yep," I quickly grabbed the first boy jumper I saw and stuck it in the air like a surrender flag to Granny. I was surrendering myself to her bullshit.

"Good, now beat it Swan,"

I made a good rustling noise with the plastic bag so it looked like I stuck the jumper in there, but I slipped it back into the box and made my way out of the room, closing the door behind me.

* * *

I crammed all of my stolen goods into the back of my car just as I heard a distinct set of heels head my way. I slammed the door closed as a pair of hands squeezed my hips from behind.

"Morning dear,"

"Jesus," I spun around to see a very tall Regina in a blue dress that had my mouth watering. She kissed me quickly as we were still in the school grounds and didn't want to scar some poor anti-gay student or co-worker.

"Feel free to call me Regina," She smirked as I rolled my eyes.

"Oh ha, very funny Regina," I kissed her forehead as she pouted, "what?"

"I have some bad news dear,"  
"What? Let me guess, your birthday's actually tomorrow," I joked but also started shitting myself because if that was the case, I was doomed.

"Sadly, no," oh thank God, "I have a board meeting this afternoon so I won't be able to come out with you,"

"Oh, that's cool," I avoided her gaze for a second. I kind of really wanted her to come because I had no idea what the woman liked in terms of bedroom shenanigans.

"What, just like that? You're _okay_ with it?"

"No not really," I scratched the back of my neck, "but I get it; work over love, that's cool,"

Regina frowned at me, "stop it dear, you're making me feel bad,"

"Yeah well, you should because…" I trailed off as I tried to figure out what to say, "don't worry; just forget about it, yeah?"

"It won't happen again, I promise," She kissed me on the cheek and squeezed my hand.

"I was just going to go birthday shopping with you because I don't know what you like or what you want or whatever, like, I don't know what extent you want to go to or what you want to do or,"

Regina shut me up with a kiss, "stop stressing dear; just get what you want, I'll work with it, trust me,"

"Ugh, fuck, _alright_," I rolled my eyes as Regina peppered kisses all over my face and I mean literally, everywhere; to my eyelids, to the bridge of my nose, to my chin, everywhere. "Leather bondage anyone?" I joked as Regina hummed happily in my arms,

"Ooh, sounds delightful Ms Swan,"

Oh no.

"Don't say that because I'll consider it," I landed a kiss on her hairline and bit her forehead softly.

"Why are you biting me?" Regina huffed, "honestly, can we keep it contained for Friday,"

"No," I stuck my tongue out and squished it against her skin, "no, I cannot,"  
"You are a child," Regina pulled away and wiped her forehead with her sleeve, "now go and be an actual teacher Ms Swan because if I remember correctly you have History this afternoon,"

"Gross," I scrunched my nose up at the mention of the class from Hell. She smiled,

"Have a good afternoon darling and I'll see you soon,"

"Yeah, yeah," I left Regina standing by my car as I headed back up towards Mary Margaret's classroom.

* * *

So the original plan of taking Regina with me when I went shopping for her birthday had failed…epically. I cringed the moment I stepped into Ruby's empty classroom as she redecorated and offered, well awkwardly muttered, if she'd like to join me in my shopping trip this afternoon. She practically threw herself across the room and jumped up and down like Henry did when he and Regina came back with ice cream ingredients.

"I'm so fucking happy we got paid today, ugh," Ruby slammed her head back into the headrest of my bug as we took off after school down the main road towards the massive shopping centre on the other side of town.

"And I can't believe Regina has a board meeting right now…" she opened the glove box and instantly located my small stash of mints. Ruby stuck three in her mouth and popped one into mine as I pulled into the car park, "I mean, damn, bitch has no idea what she's missing out on,"

"Ruby, can you like, _not_ call my girlfriend a bitch? Thanks," I flicked on my left blinker and waited for this old lady to get into her rusty old pickup truck.

"What? You know I mean it affectionately, sheesh,"

"I'm finding that hard to believe," I chimed as the old woman reversed out and I zipped in before this swanky looking red Audi took it.

"Fine, so I'm a little bit jealous that you got the babe Principal," Ruby sighed as she pulled her handbag up into her lap and undid her belt.

"She was there for the taking, for like, seven months," I rebutted as we left the car park and headed into the fucking freezing cold shopping centre.

"Yeah but, it's not the same,"  
"Why because I have her now, you want her?" I smirked as we bee-lined for the clothing store.

"_Obviously_,"

* * *

"Now, you sure you don't want to visit the sex shop?"

"Positive,"

"…sure?"

"Yes Ruby, I'm sure,"  
"But like, are you sure, sure or just, like, semi-sure,"

"Shut up Ruby and take me to the dollar store,"

The Art teacher pulled me into this little dingy shop at the end of the centre, next to a suspicious looking tattoo parlour. It stuck of incense.

"Ah my favourite shop," Ruby sniffed and tottered down the smelly candle aisle to find the source of the sandalwood, "and my favourite aisle!" she picked up a box of incense sticks and shoved it under her nose, "mm, incense,"

I snorted and took this moment to try and locate the pets section of this crappy little store. I fought my way through shoddy-made plastic water pistols and stupid birthday party getups to find a nice broad selection of dog bowls, chew toys, and finally, collars and leashes. Somehow Ruby had beaten me to the back wall where all of this was, and she was already flicking through a selection of pink patterned collars.

"I'm not really feeling pink," I scrunched up my nose as Ruby held up different designs to my throat.

"No? Well there's green…blue…" She looked up and down the wall with her mouth slightly agape, "I see orange or purple or yellow? Do you do yellow…"

I spotted exactly what I was looking for. I took it off the wall and Ruby's mouth fell open even wider.

"Really, like, really-really?"

"Yeah man, why not?" I admired the thick black leather studded collar suitable for a man-eating Mastiff, "it'll be a nice juxtaposition to innocent school girl don't you think?"

Ruby furrowed her eyebrows as she plucked the collar from my hands, running her knuckles over the blunt studs.

"Actually, yeah; it'd be good…oh! I have an idea," She held up her finger and disappeared, leaving me alone to select an appropriate leash.

Ruby returned holding one of those little tags you stick on collars for your pets. She dangled the little purple metallic heart between her fingers and smirked.

"What am I supposed to do with that?"

"Get the word 'Regina's' cut into it; it'll send you banging hot girlfriend over the edge with her weird obsession with ownership,"

I couldn't actually believe I brought Ruby with me shopping; she was going to kill me.

"Will it work, do you think?"

"Of course, Jesus Christ,"

"Okay, fine,"

I picked up a metal linked leash, the killer collar and the little tag, and headed up to the counter to pay.

"Trust me, it'll work a treat," Ruby whispered into my ear as the cashier bagged my stuff.

"Better fucking hope so,"

* * *

The moment I got home, Henry declared he was going to Claudia's birthday party.

"Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Ms Lucas isn't really doing it for me anymore, you know?"

"Oh," I dumped my purchases onto my bed as Henry flung himself down onto my mattress, "I see,"

"Yeah I mean, she's too old now and I need someone my age," he lifted his head up and crossed his arms behind it. Oh man, if only Ruby could hear my son right now.

"Someone ripe for the picking aye," I winked at Henry as I stored my dollar store purchases in my wardrobe,

"Exactly; Miss has been out in the fruit bowl for too long now," Jesus Christ, where the hell did he get these analogies from?

"Okay, good. Happy to hear that kid; so what date's the party?"

"This Friday,"

"So you going to stay the night or go home with Tom or?"

Henry eyed me weirdly, "uh no, I was going to come back here,"

"Probably not a good idea; I, uh, am inviting Regina over for dinner,"

"Oh," Henry frowned at the little lie I told him, "I'm sure I can go to Tom's for the night,"

"Yeah, that'd be good. I'll text Ruby for you and let her know, alright?"

"Yep, cool," Henry rolled off the bed and headed out to the lounge room. Shit that was close.  
If I was going to pull off Regina's birthday, I'd need no child for 24 hours.

* * *

a/n: now y'all better not fall in love with me now that you all know Regina/Emma/Ruby are literally me in three different people... ;) ;) ahaha  
xo


	25. Chapter 25

a/n: the reviews i got for the last chapter were quite broad; they went from 'date me' to being called 'egotistical'. cool.  
anyway, my internet died so i couldn't update, soz. this chapter is rated m for obvious reasons ;) so please don't read at work...please.  
Enjoy, Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

* * *

I left Henry a note saying I had the day off and had gone for run so I wouldn't see him before school. That was a nice fat _lie_. I did my makeup before I left the house. I was embarrassed to admit I spent the night before Googling makeup tutorials so that I could be the perfect little school girl for my Head Mistress today. I had false lashes in and my lips were so red that it'd put Ruby to shame. There was no way that Regina wouldn't lap this up; it was definitely the best motherfucking birthday present in the history of birthday presents.

"Ow fuck Ruby," I elbowed the brunette in the chin as I held my pile of hair up on top of my head.

"Yeah if you'd stop squirming, I could tie it quicker," Ruby made a point of pulling the collar tight against my neck before loosening it ever so slightly, "and without pinching your skin," She tucked the end bit of the collar underneath itself and moved the piece of leather around until the purple heart etched with 'Regina's' sat right on my Adam's apple.

"Fuck man, if Regina doesn't eat this up, I fucking will," Ruby clipped on the leash and tugged it.

"I feel a little awkward at how you know, intimate you and I have gotten," I quipped as I fell to my knees into the plush carpet of Regina's ice cold empty office.

"What? Do you really think I'd judge you for this? Emma, my poor, poor friend, this shit is mediocre to what I do on a weeknight," She checked her watch, "shit it's 7a.m; she'll be here any minute now". Ruby kissed me on the cheek, gave me a wink and disappeared out the door, holding my spare key to the back door of the office in between her fingers.

"Good luck,"

* * *

I waited…and waited, and to be completely honest, I couldn't _believe_ I had pulled off stage one of 'Operation Regina'. I made sure with Malory that Regina was not to be interrupted the whole day and all her Friday meetings to be moved to next week. The woman didn't ask, she just nodded and did just that.

I sat perched on my knees, in the extremely modified, extremely slutty uniform I had stolen from the Lost and Found with thigh high socks held up by garters and with a pair of black 'fuck me' heels. Outside in the office foyer, I heard a pair of heels. Not just any old heels, but distinctively Regina's. Here we go, this was going to happen. Regina's dream would be answered in the form of a submissive me dressed as a high school slut. What more could the woman want?

Regina fumbled with the keys and slowly but surely the door opened. I quickly leaned forward – the carpet tickling my nose – and waited patiently with the handle of my leash sitting on the small of my back.

"Emma, what…" but I cut her off. I pressed my arse into the floor as I slowly brought my chest up, showing off my black laced boobs that peeked through the thin material of the school blouse,

"Good morning Head Mistress, I'm here for my early morning detention,"

Jesus Christ, Regina's outfit mixed with her sudden facial expression of pure realisation of the situation had me begging to know what she'd do to me. Not that I was a naturally submissive person anyway. She stood in the doorway wearing a black dress that looked like it was painted on, it was so tight; the shoulders were slightly puffed and to top it all off, she wore back seamed stockings and heels so high they made mine look like child's play.

Regina Mills immediately fell into her role. The authority she oozed was thick in the air.

"Well, well, little Ms Swan, someone is eager to please," She scooped up the leash and yanked it hard. I squeaked as I fell forward, the side of my cheek hitting the ground hard. She stuck the toe of her heel under my hip and flipped me onto my back. Hard and fast was apparently Regina Mills. She pulled the leash up and my back arched as she fell to her knees. I gasped at the savage glint in my girlfriend's eyes. She hauled me into her lap and she ran her hand affectionately down my cheek,

"So are you my property for the day?" Regina wrapped her freezing fingers underneath my collar and yanked me up so my nose was brushing her jaw. She glanced up the little heart tag, saw the inscription and groaned.

"Yes, yes, all mine," Regina crushed her lips against mine like I was the only source of oxygen. I reached up to run my hands through her curls but grabbed them both and wrapped my wrists up with the cold metal leash. She stood up abruptly, leaving me to crash to the floor, the wind knocked clean from my lungs.

"You do not get to touch, naughty girl," Regina smirked as I struggled in the surprisingly well knotted chains, "don't struggle or you won't get your punishment,"

"Sorry Mistress," I breathed as I rolled onto my front. I tried to get onto my knees but Regina bent down as pressed my head into the floor with my arse stuck up in the air. Regina wasted no time putting her hand between my legs. I gasped at the contact. Her fingers stroked my centre as I flung my head back. I split my legs further and sunk lower to the ground as she pulled aside my black lace panties and entered me. No foreplay, no teasing, just straight to the sex. It was a bizarre change but this was Regina's day.

"Are you all wet for me dear?" This woman had the digits of a devil.

"Yes, all for you,"

I could feel myself teetering closer to the edge as her fingers stroked slowly and lightly but damn it was enough. She was teasing.

"Would you like me to make you come dear?"

"Yes," I pleaded. I needed it more than anything. But she slipped her hand out and I whimpered from the loss of contact. I glanced up with wide eyes as Regina sneered down at my flushed body.

"Not before you make me do it first,"

Okay, Regina was just being evil now. She lifted one leg up onto her desk and bless, the stocking where held up by a different pair of garters from the last time I was in this situation. Except last time, I wasn't chained up wearing a slutty school girl outfit.

"Mouth only; remind me how talented that tongue of yours is," Regina threw her head back as she wrenched me to my knees, my nose bumping her swollen clit. She bit her lip as I manoeuvred my tongue skilfully through the side of her panties and licked delicately; but by the way Regina's fingers practically ripped hair out my head, clearly it wasn't good enough. Regina licked her lips and glided her hands up and down her body and through her hair as I flattened my tongue. Jesus Christ it was so hot. She clearly had gone into her own world as she gyrated deliciously against my hot mouth. Regina was close, I could feel it. I knew she was a sucker for dirty talk.

"Please Head Mistress, let me taste you, come for me," Boom. She fell apart on my face quicker than, well, something extraordinary fast.

I bit her inner thigh softly but Regina was not having that. She shoved me hard on the shoulder and I tumbled back awkwardly onto the floor. She kneeled down and straddled me while literally ripping at my blouse. Buttons pinged off as Regina ran her hands up and down over my chest. Well, that shirt was definitely ruined. Her tongue surged into my mouth as one hand squeezed hard at my tits. She parted from my mouth and I inhaled loudly as my head swam from lack of oxygen. Regina had a cruel look on her face that would usually make me frightened but Christ Almighty; it turned me on even more. She draped the shreds of the blouse over my arms and pinned them down with her knees. She slowly unwound my shackles, making an obvious point of rubbing her boobs right in my face. I took the initiative to bite one of her perk nipples and the woman gasped. The moment my hands were free, I wasted no time in pulling Regina's face down to mine and claiming it as my own,

"I'm going to kiss you so hard that you'll never get the fucking taste of me out your mouth," I breathed as I peppered kisses down her bare throat. Regina groaned in response,

"Yes! You're all mine dirty girl,"

I stuck my hand up between her split legs and brushed my knuckles against her sensitive area. Regina chucked her head back in what I prayed in ecstasy, "One more time Ms Swan; finish your detention and make your Mistress happy,"

"Sure thing Miss,"

I wrapped my legs around her waist and flipped her over so she landed with a hiss onto her back. This would be the cherry on top of the ridiculously excellent session of sex we were in right now.  
"But Ms Mills, am I favourite student?" I cooed as I sat up as she huffed, struggling underneath my pinned legs.

"Of course dear," She was out of breath and out of patience with my games,

"And do I not get good behaviour for pleasing you ever so much Mistress?"

Regina eyed me curiously as I wiggled up further her body, my inner thighs brushing against the side of her boobs.

"What are your intentions Ms Swan?"

I ran my finger over my bottom lip, "I was never any good at Maths but I do know one number quite well, Mistress Mills,"

Regina's eyes widened dramatically as I turned myself round; my tender core level with her slightly agape mouth and I was looking down her long tanned legs.

"Are you…you suggesting…"

But instead of answering, I leaned forward and tugged the hem of her skin tight dress up her body and let it pool around her stomach. I licked her again through the material of her panties and suddenly the damn woman caught on.

"Fuck," Yep, she had definitely caught on. I peeled the soaked panties off her body with my teeth and discarded them with my shredded blouse.

"A feast fit for a queen, my love," I purred as she sucked in a deep breath,

"Mistress, my name is Mistress to you, you naughty little girl," I heard the chink of my leash being rearranged and suddenly Regina Mills mouth was where I had been craving it all last week. I let out a cry and threw my head back. Regina's soft hand came up over my butt and snaked its way up my spine. She pushed gently then more forcefully as I landed in between her legs.

"Come on dear, show me how desperate you are to rid yourself of this punishment,"

* * *

After Regina was done with me, we laid on the floor of her office, both breathing so hard it was like we'd been underwater for seven minutes.

"Happy birthday," I patted her calf which was right by my nose,  
"I was not expecting this if I am going to be completely honest; I would have been content with flowers,"

I craned my head up and stared at Regina's flush cheeks, ruffled hair and heavy lidded eyes. She was fucking gorgeous.

"Yeah but babe, you're going out with _me_. I'm not here to make you content; I'm here to make you happy,"

Regina simply smiled and looked up at the ceiling. Outside, the school office was carrying on with their day-to-day business and was completely unaware that there were two women, shagged to the point of death, lying on the floor trying to recuperate.

"That was quite the birthday present Ms Swan,"

I sat upright and laid down again; this time on top of her. I hummed at her stupidity. Oh as if the darling was only going to get one present today, I mean, what kind of girlfriend would I be if I did that?

"You know, most people get more than _one_ birthday present," I purred. Regina furrowed her eyebrows at me,

"Pardon,"

I sat up again and pulled Regina's long black trench coat off of the floor and wrapped it around myself.

"Do you honestly think I'd only give you one present?" Regina's eyes widened at my crass statement but they instantly darkened. I unclipped my leash from the collar and ran the metal links over my open palm. Regina cocked her head to the side, clearly confused. I grabbed her wrists and as softly as humanly possible, I wrapped the chain languidly around them.

"Emma…" she warned but I yanked hard and Regina shot up. I wrapped my arm around the back of her neck and crashed my lips against hers. She hummed delightfully under my touch.

"Oh dear, I approve of this wonderfully," there was a glint in her eye that I had never seen before.

"Good; I hope you have a nice relaxing day Ms Mills because you're totally mine this evening…" I leaned down to her ear and nibbled it affectionately, "my _princess_,"

* * *

a/n: oops, did someone say TWO chapters of smut? mwahaha  
hose anyone? or maybe an ice bucket challenge?


	26. Chapter 26

a/n: okay, the second half of the birthday sex chapter. as of **tomorrow (4th) i will be going on holiday/hiatus/whatever for 3 weeks** so yeah, no updates for a while.  
i have read all of your reviews and i love you all, truly. don't fret, i will be combining what you guys have suggested into my fic at some point, (so y'all ready for 'vanilla' sex, masturbation? and regina being adorable to emma).  
so enjoy ;) and i'll speak to you guys in 3 weeks!  
Emma xox (ant1ers. tumblr. com)  
_

I stood waiting by her front door. I watched the doorknob twist and how the soft setting sun of the evening spilt onto the foyer floor; it brushed the tips of my sinfully high suede heels. Don't ask me how I got in…all I will tell you is that it required some extreme wall climbing and a solid kick to the shoddy frame of Regina's fly screened, second story bathroom window.

"Afternoon my little princess,"

I cracked the riding crop against my leather clad thigh as Regina pushed the door open with her butt. She held two plastic shopping bags filled with food. What kind of person goes food shopping on their birthday? Obviously Regina did.

The bags fell from her fingers as her wide brown eyes scanned my saucy outfit. A tin of crushed tomatoes rolled out of the bag and bumped against my heel.

"Emma, how…"

But I shut her up with my mouth. This seemed to be a common thing between us. I didn't wait for her to get comfortable; I slammed her, hard, up against the wall, our legs tangling. Her breath escaped her lips and I crushed mine against hers before she could even inhale. I pinned her arms above her head and as she tried to retract them, I crushed myself harder against her. She moaned a little too loudly.

"My, my, what a curious little thing you are, Regina," I leaned in close to whisper her name into her ear because I knew it turned her to jelly, "you had your fun this morning; time for a little payback, don't you think?"

I pulled a blindfold with great difficulty from my skin tight leather trousers and slipped it over Regina's eyes as she bit her lip.

"Of course dear, whatever do you have in mind?"

"Just a little thing I've wanted to do since I first laid eyes on you," I nudged Regina towards her extravagant staircase and she trotted forward a little apprehensively, her hands searching for the wall. I wasn't going to help her up the stairs, no way. I tiptoed behind her, running the leather tip of the crop up and down her spine; once or twice, I smack her arse with it to keep her on her toes.

When we finally reached the closed door of her bedroom, Regina smiled knowingly but I was about to wipe that smirk right off her pretty little face.

"Stay here, won't you?" I turned on my heel and made my way into the bedroom. But she followed like a zombie.

"I said," I pressed the crop to her lips, "_stay_,"

"When do I ever listen to you Ms Swan?"

She had a point. I shrugged and realised she couldn't see it. I locked the door behind us, just in case someone came over.

I left her standing in the middle of the room. Regina put her hands onto her hips and hissed, "Ms Swan if you have left me in here by myself, I will declare this birthday the worst in existence,"

I giggled, "Oh my little princess, how eager you are to please,"

Regina stiffened and with only slight difficulty, reverted to 'innocent little princess' mode. I circled the woman, trailing the crop over her dress and I could actually see the shivers rippling out over her arms and neck.

I fiddled with the zip of her dress that sat on the nape of her neck. I pressed my lips to the flushed skin as I slowly pulled the zipper down her back. Regina whimpered but did not utter a single word.

"Good girl," I pressed myself flush against her and yanked the dress down her thighs and let it flutter to the floor. She stood naked except for her underwear and it was the most delightful view in the world. Her hair tickled my nose as I nuzzled into the crook of her neck, nipping the skin lightly.

"Thank you, _Majesty_,"

Oh how delightful that name sounded falling from her plump lips. I stepped back and ran the leather crop up and down her legs, over her back; I even split her legs and slapped it against where I knew would set the woman alight with arousal. She threw her head back and I knew she was ready. I slipped my fingers between her legs and curled my fingers. They came back wet.

"Looks like my little princess is ready to be broken in; ready to become a Queen,"

I sucked her juices from my fingers and edged her towards the bed, readying myself for the enchanting hell I was about to unleash on Regina Mills.

An artist could appreciate his own work right? Well, that's what I was doing in that moment. Regina was naked and bound with strips of leather to each bed post; spread out like a giant X. Her eyes were still sheathed in a satin blindfold. The way she arched her back in anticipation had me watering at the mouth. Regina tugged harshly and growled out loudly. Wow the woman was angry when she wasn't immediately stimulated after being aroused. What fun.

I crawled up onto the sheets and sat up onto my knees; the front of my thighs brushing Regina inners. She squirmed as I ran the crop over her twitching clit. I slapped it and Regina yelped.

"Time to spice things up my darling Regina," I leaned down, my face inches from her pussy. I licked it clean and then blew a breath over it. She moaned,  
"Don't toy with me Ms Swan,"

"Last time I checked, it's you bound and begging, not me,"

She growled as I stuck two fingers inside her, not waiting for her permission.

"No foreplay Princess, you have to earn your title like every other dirty little bitch," I jeered, "by taking it all like a true _Queen_,"

Regina bit her bottom lip and threw her head back into her satin pillows, "God!"

I pumped harder and harder as I toyed with her clit. Regina threw her head back once more and let out a guttural moan that signified an orgasm of epic proportions. Glancing down beside the bed, I spotted my next weapon of choice; whipped cream.

"Remember how I promised you whipped cream?" I cooed as Regina panted. I didn't wait for her to catch her breath as I wiggled myself up her constricted body; making a point of grating my wet centre against her toned stomach. I shook the ice cold bottle and squeezed a little into the dip between her collarbones, just to test the water. I licked it out and slowly sucked the skin up her bare neck. Regina hummed in pleasure as I shoved my tongue into her mouth.

"Oh yes, whipped cream, oh my god," Regina was incoherent as I let my tongue trail down in between her breasts. I slowly rocked myself against her as I covered one breast with cream. Regina knew what I was about to do because she bucked her boob into my mouth the moment she felt my breath against her flushed skin. I cleaned that one off and turned to the next one, covering it all and sucking into my hot mouth.

"Oh God, yes," Regina cried out as I flicked my tongue against her perked nipple. I bite the skin above her nipple so hard that I knew it'd leave a mark for tomorrow.

I scooted my butt further down her body until our cores were millimetres away from each other. Regina was thrashing and I was being the true bitch by not lowering myself that little bit so that we'd meet.

"Do you deserve it…bitch?"

I hated using that word in dirty talk but the way it made Regina squirm made it all okay.

"Yes, yes, oh god I have,"

"Sure? Or do you need a little more breaking in?"

"No, no I am broken," Regina groaned as I pinched her clit with my forefinger and thumb,

"So…" let's see how bad she wanted it, "who broke you? Hmm, who's your Queen?"  
"You," she breathed. That's all I needed; that's all I wanted, Regina submitting. I fell onto her and we both cried out at the contact; finally. We gyrated against each other until I was on the brink of earth-shattering orgasm. I knew it, Regina knew it and pretty sure Regina's neighbours knew that too.

"Come for me Princess," I straddled myself over the woman's body and reached up to pinch and roll her tender boobs in my hands. And Regina did. I wasn't expecting Regina to be such a screamer but damn, the woman was going to need some sore throat lozenges after that little singsong. Hearing her sent me over the edge as well. I swear I saw stars.

I sat cross legged at the end of Regina's bed while Regina was still very much tied up.

"Let me out _now_,"

"No," I ran my hands over the very tight leather strap around her right ankle.

"Yes,"

"Oh no, do you think I'm really finished with you Regina?"

Regina raised her head at me, and I wish I hadn't removed the blindfold because her eyes drilled into my soul.

I waggled my eyebrows as I shook the now lukewarm bottle of whipped cream.

"Oh God," Regina let her head fall heavily back into her pillows.

"That's what you'll be screaming in a minute babe," I giggled as I gave the bottle one final shake. Regina squirmed as held the tip of the bottle right on the entrance of her sex. I flicked her clit with the nozzle and squirted a little bit of the cream on to it. I leaned down and sucked her clit into my mouth once again and the taste of Regina mixed with my favourite dairy snack sent my head spinning.

"Fuck,"

I left a trail of cream up to her naval and slowly lapped it all up; swirling my milky tongue in her belly button. Regina groaned and yanked hard on her binds.

"Now, now my darling, don't struggle," I soothed her by running my open palms up and down her thighs. She writhed some more before relaxing when I bit the inside of her thigh.

"One last time before I even deem you worthy of the title of Queen, yes?"

"Oh God," Regina breathed, repeating her last statement. I grazed my teeth against the sensitive skin on her folds and plunged myself into them.

"Emma, Jesus Christ, yes," Regina knees bumped against the side of my head as she fought the urge to clamp them around my skull. Hear Regina cuss like that had me on edge. I was so close and god damn if she wasn't then I was proud.

"Shit Regina, I'm…I'm so close, fuck,"

I dropped one of my hands from Regina's fidgeting body and slithered two of my own fingers into myself. I think Regina noticed what I did and she shivered once last time before I tasted her fully on my tongue. I followed suit and God; I'd given Regina three orgasms to my one.

"Holy…" Regina relaxed into the soft mattress. I collapsed on top of her,

"Happy birthday," I swallowed and planted a kiss on her cheek, "Queen Regina,"

She hummed at my compliment as I undid her straps. The moment they all fell off, Regina wrapped her limbs around me and my God, added four more to my tally of orgasms.  
Well, happy birthday to me…even though, like, its Regina's… but like, whatever.

_

a/n: hi my name is crackedconcrete and i challenge my readers to an ice bucket challenge because heaven knows you lot may or may not need one after this chapter...  
I'M JOKING YOU DON'T HAVE TO.  
xo


	27. Chapter 27

a/n: okay so I'm so sorry about the late update but I had a whole heap of shit go on. So, in a nutshell, what went from a family holiday turned into me moving countries and I'm now living back at home in Australia. Oh well. Also, I have some bad slash good news; first part is that I will be ending this fic soon (not really really really soon, but soonish...I guess) and the second part is that I have about three new fics I am going to start. I will definitely put all the suggestions I have been messaged for this particular fic into use before I end the story. I have read them all and even though I may not have acknowledged you, I APOLOGISE AND I WILL USE THEM.  
Happy reading!  
Emma x (ant1ers. tumblr. com)

Regina had me by the metaphorical balls because it's been a good solid week and a bit since her birthday and we hadn't even touched. I mean, we've kissed but nothing more than a peck because God knows I'd have my hands down her pants the moment there was no other co-workers or Henry in sight. Good thing Regina had a knack for turning up when the staffroom was mega packed or it was that five minutes between classes where the school explodes into havoc of students running around.

I had somehow scored some spare time this afternoon so I took it upon me to try and actually mark the ever growing pile of essays that I had tried to unsuccessfully palm off to Mary Margaret. I hadn't touched Regina in a week and damn, that was like forever in 'my' time. I recrossed my legs to control the urge to touch myself. Suddenly my mind exploded with images of Regina on her knees underneath my desk and I had to stifle a moan. Holy fuck, this was not okay. I glanced at my watch then at the classroom door; it was mid-lesson and there was no classes either side of this room. _Maybe…_

When it came to anything sex oriented, I was ready to go in a matter of seconds so I locked the door, pulled the blinds shut and sat down on one of the desks. I practically wiped drool off my mouth as I unbuckled my trousers and stuck my hand straight down in between my underpants and bare skin.

Regina's eyes… her tongue… her fingers… the way her hair tickled my thighs… her damn tongue… heels… skirt… open shirt… oh. It didn't take me long. I threw my head back as there was a soft knock on the door. Oh shit. I slipped off the desk ungracefully and tugged my jeans up as I tried to smooth my hair down.

I spotted a flash of shoulder length brunette hair and sighed in relief. Thank god that hair wasn't a pixie cut or I'd be screwed. I left myself a little dishevelled and my trousers unbuckled as I answered the door.

"…Afternoon my little princess,"

Her face was priceless as I stood there, leaning against the frame with my clearly rumpled outfit.

"Ms Swan," Regina's eyes travelled up and down my body, "were you… were you," she leaned forward, her eyes ablaze, "touching yourself?"

"What would you do if I said yes?"

Regina glanced down at my hands, her eyes flicking between the two. I took the initiative to lift my still slightly wet right hand to her lips. Regina's eyes didn't leave mine as she wrapped her tongue around my fingers. She groaned as she tasted me and I pulled her into room. Maybe our dry sex spell was about to be up and I grinned sheepishly as Regina kissed up and down my neck. I locked the door again, praying that Mary Margaret didn't come in.

I grabbed her tiny wrists and pinned them up above her head, completely ignoring the selection of papers in between her fingers.

"Enough…" she hissed but I didn't listen. I captured her lips in mine and nipped the skin just behind her ear. That usually had her weak at the knees but apparently that wasn't the case today.

"I said, enough dear,"

My darling girlfriend twisted herself out of my grasp and sauntered off to my desk leaving me breathing deep and fixing my trousers. Somehow I had lost my restraint and Regina welded it in her super smooth, super tiny hands. Regina sighed and leaned over my desk, glaring at the stack of pink papers like they had killed her mother.

"Well, that was, um, _delightful_," I wrapped my arms around her waist and bent down to kiss her on the cheek just as her head shot up to greet me. My open mouth and sharp teeth collided with the tip of her nose and Regina made the same noise a mouse would make if you disturbed it mid-snacking on cheese.

"Oh shit, sorry, I mean, oh god," I grimaced as Regina rubbed the nub of her nose. I did spot mild tooth marks. I let her go immediately,

"If you wanted to spice up our kissing, can you maybe let me know before you go ahead and bite my nose?"

I gulped before the woman broke out in the biggest grin I'd ever seen her sport. She reached out hooked her finger around my chin and pulled me down into a kiss that was rather soft yet passionate and I totally wanted like another ten minutes of that type of kissing.

"Now, the reason I wanted you here…" she motioned to the pink form in front of her, lying on the desk and I made a face that looked like someone had shoved a jar of pickles into my mouth. And for the record, I don't like pickles.

"It's not that bad…"

My face was still contorted when she kissed the side of my mouth,

"I don't like forms," I whined,

"I know you don't dear, but you don't have to sign anything; I just need your…_professional opinion_,"

"You came to me only for a professional opinion…really?" I flopped down into one of the plastic chairs and huffed as Regina sorted her papers.

"Well, clearly I missed the show of a lifetime, but yes…you are a teacher, are you not?"

"Well, yeah, but,"

"And it's your profession, right?"

"Well, _duh_,"

Regina frowned at me, "then I don't see why you have a problem with it dear,"  
"There are teachers here who have been here longer than me and have a more, I don't know, reliable _opinion_,"

"That might be true Emma, but no other of my staff know Maine Falls High School like you do,"

"I…wait _what_?" What the hell was Regina playing at? Why did she bring up the school I used to work at? "Maine Falls High?"

"Yes," She tapped the papers and laid them down flat on the desk, running the palm of her hand over them to smooth out any wrinkles.

"I'm hiring some more staff and I happen to have one woman who exceeds all my requirements and it so happens she's from Maine Falls High School,"

I eyed the form in front of her closely. Oh shit, it was a definite '_request for transfer'_ form with a big fat red '_transfer accepted_' stamp in the corner. I squirmed uncomfortably in my seat. Not many of the staff at Maine Falls liked me. It was your standard high school but with one little twist; completely and utterly religious and ran by a crazy Christian nut job. Not that I had anything against Christians, it's just… they made me feel very unwelcome with my, well, _life choices_, per say.

I think Regina noticed my preoccupancy because she reached forward and scooped my hand into hers. She rubbed it soothingly. But the disgusting memories of the old school had me feeling ever so slightly bitter so instinctively, I yanked my hand out of hers. Regina looked dumbstruck and confused with what to do with her hands so she just clasped them together awkwardly and cleared her throat.

"What's her name?" I asked, chewing the inside of my cheek. The Principal blinked once,

"She, um, has a bizarre name; it's almost up there with Astrid Nova's…"  
"Regina…" I picked at the plastic, "_tell me_," I had inkling with who it was; there was only one lady who had a weirder name than Astrid's.

"Her name is…her name is Blue Superior,"

It felt like I had been hit with a train. The hatred I had for that stupid named woman exploded up into my mouth and spewed out in the shape of abusive words.

"You hired Blue?!" I seethed. I'm pretty sure my nails had ripped through the hard plastic material of Regina's school chairs and the woman nodded woodenly.

"You fucking hired Blue Superior? Are you joking? Is this some kind of sick joke?" I stood up abruptly and ran my fingers through my hair. I felt the flash backs flicker through my mind like a sick movie. The woman ruined my life and almost ruined my career because she couldn't handle the fact I was gay. She was more religious than the damn Principal of Maine Falls. For months, after it became public knowledge that I preferred lasses over lads, I received anonymous hate in the forms of letters, emails and even written in the dust of my car windshield. It was all from her. Blue even made her students make a point of talking about how 'unnatural' homosexuality was in all my classes. The woman didn't just want my fired; she wanted to ruin everything I held dear.

I half expected Regina to apologise for her mistake but she simply shrugged, "I feel that is a definite no towards Blue from you,"

I spun around and Regina was simply jotting away some notes on her form, "is she a good teacher?"

"Is she…is she a good teacher?" I fumed, "Regina, she _ruined_ my life! You can't hire her,"

"Says who?" Regina steeled. I immediately spotted the evil Principal persona and not the soft woman who made my son ice cream and who kissed me when I had nightmares.

"Says _me_," I stalked closer the woman who, even though I loved a tonne, I really wanted to punch right in the face, "or, oh wait," I bared my teeth at her as Regina simply lifted an eyebrow at me, "you put your job, your _career_, in front of anything and everything you love!" I screeched, "The woman made death threats to me; she turned my students, my _own students_ against me because what I am…" I pointed myself really hard in the chest but it didn't matter, I needed to get this through to the woman, "because of whom I am,"

I felt the tears prick the back of my eyes as Regina softened immediately. I don't think she realised the profound affect Superior had on me.

"She practically waged a war against me and I was losing, okay? Blue had every other teacher wrapped around her damn claws and they had me thrown out," I choked, "I may have said that it was an end of contract and I may have been happy about it, but I was only happy because I would leave that hell hole,"

I think the people who called Regina 'ice cold' were definitely correct because she went from ice cold bitch to melting into a puddle of teary goo.

"Emma, I…I had no idea, I'm so, so sorry," Regina practically threw herself over the desk and wrapped her thin arms around my middle. I couldn't breathe, not from the fact that Regina was attempting to crush me in a bear hug but from the fact that I had told _someone_ the truth. I pried her off me and she crumpled into herself. Regina hugged her own stomach and I just spun on my heel and ripped the door open,

"I just…I just need to figure my head out…I need to figure out if I'm still willing to accept your offer of a full time position if I am working beside Blue Bitch," I slammed the door shut and bee lined towards the car park.

My head was spinning. Everything was spinning. My life had been thrown upside down because Regina had already approved the transfer and for fuck sake, what was I supposed to do? I tore apart my car's glove box for the small packet of cigarettes I kept for emergencies like this. Bingo. How was I supposed to work efficiently when that crazy bitch was going to be here, breathing down my neck? I threw the car door shut with my cigarettes and a lighter in hand. Fuck this. I ripped a little white stick from the box and stuck it into my mouth.

"Emma…Emma!"

Oh great, Mary Margaret. The History teacher grabbed my shoulder as I lit the cigarette and stormed out the grounds.

"What happened?"  
"Regina hired a teacher from my old school who ruined my life; that's what happened," I sucked at the cigarette like my life depended on it. Mary Margaret scrunched her nose up at the smell but didn't comment.

"I'm sure she didn't know…" Ms Blanchard awkwardly tugged at her necklace,

"But she knew the woman was from Maine Falls. God Superior is such a bitch," I shook my head as I tapped the ash off, "oh; Ms Superior is the bitch of a teacher Regina's hired,"

"Ah…is that her real last name or?"

"Yep,"

"Oh,"

"I mean, I barely survived under Superior's care, what makes you think I'd be able to stand that torture again?" I growled. Mary Margaret softened,  
"Because you have me and Ruby, and most importantly, you have Regina…the big boss. Plus, everyone seems to like you here so," Mary Margaret shrugged her shoulders as I smiled meekly,

"Thanks M,"

"No worries…Emm," She grinned as I nudged her in the arm for her stupid joke.

"Regina is the boss and you and I both know she's protective as hell over what she loves; she will protect you, I promise," Mary Margaret rubbed my shoulder affectionately, "well, we promise,"

First thing's first, I had to apologise to Regina but when I went on a walk around the school to try and locate the Principal she was nowhere to be found. I sussed out Malory and turns out Regina left abruptly, apparently with tear streaked cheeks and a look that Malory couldn't figure out if it was lust or anger. I had no classes for the rest of the day so I decided to text Henry saying to catch the bus home and I drove out to Regina's mansion, hoping I'd spot her damn Mercedes, but it wasn't there. Shit. I pulled into her driveway and dialled her number. It rung out on loudspeaker and Regina answered after nine rings.

"Emma, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you…"

"Shush," Regina did so immediately, "I'm not angry at you; I just needed to clear my head. I understand that I have no control over who you do and do not hire, and it was stupid of me to think I could persuade you out of doing something that was clearly going to benefit the school,"

She was silent, a little too silent.

"Regina?"

"Yeah," her voice was thick,

"…Where are you?"

"I'm…I'm home,"

I furrowed my eyebrows and stared up at the desolate mansion.

"Regina, I'm parked outside your house…you're not here,"

"That's not home dear, that's just an empty house,"

"Then where's…?" It clicked, "oh, I'll be home in a jiffy,"

"Okay…and Emma?"

"Yes?"

"I love you,"  
I gulped as I reversed out her driveway and headed down the main road towards my own home, knowing full well that that is where I would find Regina. She had so often preferred to come to my house instead of us over hers.

"I love you too," I ended the call and sped back down towards my road where I spotted a black Mercedes Benz parked in its usual spot next to the letter box.

~~~

a/n: spiced shit up by adding Blue, yay. But I'm not too fond of this chapter but hey, what can you do.


	28. Chapter 28

**a/n: this chapter was fun to write and i love how you're all interested on how i'll portray Blue! the whole dynamic between Regina/Emma/Blue was so fun to write mwahahaha. also, like, i'm pretty sure the last bit with the contract is a wee bittttttt fake because i'm pretty sure it's illegal, whoops. but nonetheless, this is AU and we all love a controlling bitchy hot Regina so i'm sure y'all let it fly ;)**  
**Anyway, happy reading! please remember that this story will be finishing soon but not TOO soon. **  
**Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr. com) the L is a 1, fyi x**

That night, Regina found my bottle of Whiskey and proceeded to drink all of it, and by eight at night, she was done. Oh so done. Henry walked in the door from an afternoon out at the shopping centre with friends to a very drunk, sobbing Regina. He kind of took it in stride and just followed all of Regina's weird requests like making her pot noodle and specifically asking for a pair of used socks from my laundry basket. After tucking the love of my life into my bed, I had to explain to my bewildered son that she was dealing with some shit and just to accept it. He did, and he thought it was funny. Little bugger.

That was Friday evening, and now it was Monday morning and I was brushing my teeth for the third time in one hour. Superior was arriving today and I was nervous. I had no idea how Regina was going to handle this, hell; I had no idea how I was going to handle this. Regina said that Blue was momentarily taking the new Head of Department for English and then being moved over to the School Library to work beside that Australian Belle girl.

"Come on Mum, we're going to be late," Henry groaned as I left my bedroom, slipping on a pair of black heels. Regina liked me in heels and Lord knows I'll need all her loving today. We left the house with Henry running down to the bug and me shuffling along because I only had one heel on.

I did the usual of dropping Henry down the road from the school before I sped off and pulled into the staff car park. It was just Blue… it was just another woman. I killed the engine and glared at the frightening familiar forest green Camry. She was here already. Shit the woman was earlier than Regina? That's a first. As if by a miracle, there was a loud honk behind me and Regina's Mercedes slipped quietly into the grounds. Fuck, I only got a glimpse of her and she looked fantastic. She was going to have Superior eating out her hand…and me possibly eating her out, full stop. Regina opened her door and a pair of long, stockinged legs stretched out and I really needed to learn how to control myself around the woman. Her fingers hooked on a pair of heels that put mine to shame, and she clambered out gracefully. Stockings, high waisted pencil skirt, super see-through shirt with black bra underneath; Hell fucking yeah.

"Good morning dear," Regina whispered as I came up and practically rammed the woman into the side of the car. She was so perfect and goddamn I just wanted to feel her under my hands.

"Hey," I pressed my hips into hers and placed my mouth onto hers. Regina hummed under my contact.

"Someone's happy to see me," I kissed her quickly on the side of the mouth,

"Well yeah, it's _you_,"  
"How sweet," I felt the woman roll her eyes as I grinned and kept kissing her.

"I'm a bloody angel Regina,"

"Then what am I?" she mocked,

"Oh, you?" I brushed my lips down her neck, "you, Regina Mills, are definitely the Devil,"

"Very well," Regina hummed as another car pulled into the car park.

"Can you please stop twitching Ms Swan?"

"Hmm," I peeled my eyes off the open window and Regina had raised an eyebrow at my jigging knee, "oh, right, sorry,"

Regina shook her head as she scanned over Blue Superior's teaching records.

"She's going to be here soon," I said as I rubbed my sweaty palms on my black trousers. Regina grunted in agreement as she scratched the skin just where her black glasses met the bridge of her nose,

"So um, are you sure you want me here?"

"Yes dear," She still didn't look up at me. I felt like my heart was breaking through my ribcage. I sighed and rubbed my hands together,

"Like, are you sure-sure or?"

Regina deadpanned and finally, glanced at me, "there is no need for you to be worried Emma,"

"But…it's _Blue_,"

"Yes, and _I_ am here," Regina smiled, "Remember what Mary Margaret told you, we're all here for you,"  
"Even if I think the Principal of this school is a mega babe?" I grinned sheepishly. Regina hung her head and I spotted a small smirk on her lips,

"Yes, even if you think the Principal is a mega babe and you try to kiss her at all the inappropriate times,"  
"Hey!" I raised my hands in defence, "not my fault you're totally kissable all the time,"

There was a knock at the closed door. Shit. Regina faced sideways to me as she flicked her heels back on. She rolled her shoulder at me seductively and winked like a massive moron,

"You're actually a dork, Regina,"

Regina smiled as she stood up and skimmed past me to answer the door to her office,

"And you love me,"

"I know," I took a deep breath and exhaled loudly as Regina squeezed my hand, "let's do this,"

I sat down in the chair next to Regina's empty one and crossed my legs. I lifted my chin slightly and gripped the ends of the armchair like my life depended on it.

"Good morning Ms Superior, I am Regina Mills,"

Here we go; time to party, time to shine.

"Hello, and please, call me Blue,"

Her voice was a sick reminder of everything I left behind at that stupid school. The sound of her voice and her manic laughter made me cower every time I heard it at Maine Falls. She was a power crazy bitch and I hope Regina knows what the fuck she's signing herself up for.

"Of course Blue, please come in; I will have another member of staff with me because of pedagogy reasons". Why the fuck was she using the excuse of pedagogy? Where was Regina going with this?

"Of course," there were clicks of several pairs of heels. I was not ready, nope, no, no I was not. Pedagogy or no pedagogy, I wanted out. I stood up immediately and regretted it. My leg was dead and I stumbled slightly.

"This is Emma Swan,"

Oh shit. I looked up and Regina stared at my slightly confused. It definitely looked like I was in a deep bow to the stupid Christian crazy lady by the name of Blue Superior.

Blue hadn't changed at all. Still a ball of subtle intensity squished into a very small woman. Much like Regina, but not. Her hair was classically pinned back and her eyebrows still like daggers; her eyes still very much weirdly close and her head super big. She wore a stupid white blouse and a stupid navy jumper over that with a super stupid skirt and a pair of stupid looking heels. She was so stupid.

Blue's eyes practically popped out her head when she saw me. I fell backwards into the chair and acted like nothing had happened.

"My, my," Superior looked me up and down like I was a dog Regina had dragged in, "never thought I'd see you again, _Swan_," her voice was venomous. I glared at her,

"Lovely to see you too, _Blue_,"

Blue bared her teeth at me slightly as Regina closed the door behind us. Regina stepped behind me and rested a reassuring hand on my shoulder. Blue's brown eyes zeroed in on the contact. Almost what seemed subconsciously, Superior fiddled with her necklace until a massive cross flipped out from underneath her jumper, and landed smack bang in the middle of her chest for the whole world to see.

"Seems to me like you two have met already," Regina smirked knowingly as Blue cleared her throat and straightened herself.

"Of course," Blue's eyes flicked over to me briefly, "why Emma and I used to work together at Maine Falls,"

"Hmm," Regina pulled out Blue Superior's file, "and did you enjoy it there, Ms Superior?"

"Of course,"

"May I ask why you chose Story Brooke College?"

"Closer to home," She snipped. That was a lie. Everybody knew the woman lived down the road from Maine Falls, which was like a good half an hour away from this place. She always made a point of 'popping home' to grab work she'd left or food for lunch.

"Excellent," Regina tapped the papers like a news reporter would do just before going on air, "I have already approved your transfer Ms Superior, and you are to start work tomorrow," Superior titled her head towards Regina in acknowledgement, "but, I have a few rules. Story Brooke College is a lot different to Maine Falls in the way we run things,"

Regina leaned back into her chair and recrossed her legs. Somehow she'd scooted the chair closer to mine.

"First, we are an open minded school. We accept _everyone_ for who they are; for their sexuality, religion, whatever, we accept it". Blue's nostrils flared at the sexuality statement. She looked at me and I smirked.

"Many of our staff and students are openly gay and many also believe in religions other than Christianity". Regina was on fucking fire. She had Blue squished under her foot like the little grub she was.

"N-no problem," Blue cracked her knuckles,

"Clearly, this is a problem to you Ms Superior; please enlighten me on what frustrates you," Regina tapped her nails annoyingly on her armrest.

"To be honest, Ms Mills, I am a very religious person and I do not believe nor accept your school's open-mindedness,"

"Well then, we are going to have some issues aren't we?" Regina leaned forward and I could see the sparkle of mischief in her eyes.

"I do not like _gays_," Blue stared directly at me, licking her lips.

"My lovely co-worker here, Ms Swan, has educated me on her side of the Maine Falls story," Blue gulped, "and I am not very happy at all,"

"You don't understand Regina…"

"It's Ms Mills to you," Feisty bitch Regina,

"…Ms Mills, you don't understand," she leaned forward, slightly out of earshot of me, "they're _everywhere_. We straight women need to stick together, who knows what'll happen,"

And in that moment, I wanted to punch Blue in the face but also kiss the fuck out of Regina for her horrified facial expression.

"Whatever will you straight people do…"

Regina stood up, bumping the table and frightening poor little Blue.

"I'm sorry, 'you straight people'? My dear, you are straight; you meant 'whatever will we straight people do'" Blue muttered innocently. This bitch was about to get her head sliced open.

"_Emma_," Regina whispered, her hands balled up at her sides. I jumped to attention.

"Uh yeah,"

Regina turned to Blue, her chest heaving in anger.

"Dear, you misconstrue me," Regina bunched the material of my collar in her tiny hands and yanked my face towards hers. She was angry, that's for sure, because her teeth bit into my lips and her tongue was harsh and deadly.

"Monsters," Blue screeched but Regina didn't pull away, in fact, she latched on even harder. Note to self, piss Regina off before having sex.

"You are just like…_her_," Blue pointed a shaky finger at me as Regina let me go. Regina wiped her lipstick off from around her lips,

"Blue Superior, I'd like you to meet my co-worker and girlfriend, Emma Swan," Regina entwined her fingers with mine as Blue cursed us.

"I want out, she-devil! I want nothing to do with this school of blasphemers!"

Regina laughed manically as she picked Blue's contract up from the edge of the table and slammed it down right in front of the terrified Christian teacher.

"You know what this contract states? You're mine…_bitch_," She pointed to Superior's loopy signature, "don't' think you can go crying to Head of Education, Sidney Glass, because I have that dumb little imbecile wrapped around my finger,"

Blue gawked at the form like she didn't realise she'd signed her life away. Well, technically she hadn't, but in this moment, it felt like she did.

"Your services are required for a minimal of five weeks,"  
"I want to be gone after that; immediately," Blue spat. Regina brightened instantaneously,

"Excellent. Emma, after our friend here has left, would you like to take the permanent position of Head of English?"

My mouth fell to the floor. So this was Regina's plan the whole time. Holy shit, I was in a relationship with an evil mastermind.

"Um, yeah, totally…I guess,"

"Fine, it's settled. Blue, you will work for five weeks and then I no longer require your services,"

**a/n: pedagogy means studying how to educate high school students to the best of their abilities, or some shit. **  
**KINDA SORRY ABOUT THE CONTRACT BIT, KINDA NOT. **


	29. Chapter 29

**a/n: I can't seem to get page breaks any more so that's a total bitch, ugh. So 'SQSQSQ' is now the page break. **  
**Anyway, this chapter was based on an anon message i received on tumblr about Emma being all cute to Regina after a long week of school-based crap.  
****Also, this story has over 55 000 views! holy mother of God, that's so crazy! I love you all and thank you all so so much for all the love and reviews.**  
**Enjoy!**  
**Emma xo**

SQSQSQSQ

Being in a relationship with the Boss totally had its perks, for example, paid holiday leave. I didn't even need it but Regina gave it to me, like a whole solid week of it. I totally jumped her bones every night… in the bed, in the shower, up against the wall, her car, and oh, I may have snuck into school one day and we have may of totally done it in the storage closet. So much sex was had. Anyway, Regina said the time off was for Blue to settle in without my influence. Like, _what bitch_? Blue ruined my life not the other way around but Regina both silenced and changed my opinion with a kiss and a soft hand down the front of my pants. The woman knew the way to my heart was through my pants.

The morning that Blue had her initiation, she stormed off into the school grounds and managed to piss off like four different members of staff. They didn't even know her name yet, it was great.

SQSQSQSQ

It was five on a Friday afternoon by the time Regina waltzed herself through my front door. Regina hardly went back to her house anymore. Her hair was fluffy, her pant suit crumpled and the bags under her eyes had gotten darker.

I, myself, happen to be sprawled out on my couch watching a day long marathon of Law and Order Special Victims Unit, and finishing off a lukewarm beer. I peered up to her and she stood there, wobbling slightly, her eyes wide open. I practically threw myself at the woman as she stared at me worryingly.

"She's hell isn't she?" Regina whispered. I immediately knew who she was talking about. I bit my lip and nodded.

"How did you ever survive?"

I shrugged, "Eh, tough skin but nothing like you, honey,"

"The teachers hate her," She stated matter-of-factly,

"I know,"

"And they love you,"

"Yep,"

"And I am so excited for that bitch to leave,"  
"So am I," I pried Regina's suitcase from her fingers and guided her towards the couch. She smiled at me, "I don't even know why I hired her,"

"Would this be a bad time to say 'I told you so'?"

Regina's glaring response answered that question. Suddenly, I had a brilliant idea.

I clapped my hands together once and Regina flinched slightly, "you know what? Because I am the most magical, fabulous…_majestic_ girlfriend in the history of girlfriends, I am going to pamper your worn out arse,"

"Ms Swan, what are you…" But before she could finish her question, I scooped up the tiny woman and flung her over my shoulder. Her little fists pounded on the small of my back for me to let her go, but I didn't.

SQSQSQSQ

I dumped her onto my bed and immediately she grabbed one of my pillows and aimed it straight for my head.

"Ms Mills, please for the love of God, control yourself," I crawled my way up onto the bed and squashed myself against my cowering girlfriend,

"Ms Swan!" Regina giggled as I snatched at her ankles and pulled her body underneath mine. Regina just grinned up at me and I still couldn't think how someone like me ended up with someone as magical as Regina fucking Mills. She reached out and stroked my cheek and I couldn't help but lean in and kiss her.

"I thought you were meant to be pampering me, not trying to bed with me, dear,"

I shrugged, "Eh, things change,"

Regina squished her forefinger against my lips before I leaned back down,

"Oh no, you can't tantalise something like that in front of me and then rip it away. That's mean,"

I groaned and leaned my forehead against Regina's, "what would you like me do, your Majesty?"

"I thought I was your little princess?" Regina pouted. I scrunched up my face and she laughed, which for the record, still sounded like baby angels giggling. She made a face that suggested some hard core thinking then I felt her weight shift under me,

"Foot rub Ms Swan,"

"I don't like feet," I whined as I sat up onto my knees,

"You'll like mine,"  
"I don't like feet, full stop," I crossed my arms and stared down at the wiggling Principal.

"Did you know Ms Swan that for most women; the feet are an erogenous zone?" She smirked,

"And," Regina winked and I felt like a light bulb had just gone off inside my skull, "oh,"

"Yes Ms Swan, _oh_,"

I lifted myself off Regina's body and scowled at the two little freakish things poking out at the ends of Regina's pant suit. Each nail was painted in a pretty dark purple and it was obvious Regina used that pumice stone thing to make her feet all nice and lovely. I sighed and gingerly lifted her left foot like it was dead animal.

"Stop looking like I've asked you to eat faeces, and massage my damn foot Emma,"

This entire situation had gone off course. I was originally meant to be in control with the pampering but it seems to me that the crazy woman I call my girlfriend had gone classic control freak and now had the reins. Damn it.

"Fine, but afterwards, I'm making your favourite dinner,"

Regina sighed like she was completely done with me, "Fine,"  
"Excellent,"

"Good,"

"Cool,"

Regina frowned at me and I just smiled, "Um, Regina?"  
"Yes, dear,"  
"What _is_ your favourite dinner?"

SQSQSQSQ

Regina demanded that she set the table so I just let the crazy woman do it. She hummed loudly as she set the table for three; Henry, herself and me. Henry waltzed out of his bedroom looking like the living dead, having crashed straight to sleep after coming home from school.

"Smells good Ma," he rubbed his eyes and stifled a yawn as he rested his head against my shoulder,

"Afternoon Mr Henry,"

Henry literally ripped himself off me as Regina made her way into the kitchen with a tea towel slung over her shoulder.

"Oh uh, hi Ms Mills,"

"Please," Regina swatted my son with the towel, "for the millionth time, call me Regina,"

But Henry shook his head, "I still don't think I can, I mean what happens if I get used to it and then start calling you Regina at school?"

"Then I'll accept it," Regina shrugged as she pulled three plates from my cupboard and lined them up next to the cooker.

"See kid, Regina's cool like that," I stirred the last of the Asian styled vegetables and plonked them in equal piles onto the plates. Regina beamed at the statement.

"Thank you dear," She pressed a quick kiss to my cheek,

"Ugh fine, whatever. Anyway, what are we having for dinner? Looks like nothing you've ever done before Ma,"

"It's slightly out my comfort zone kid; it's Pad Thai and I haven't done it in like, forever," I dumped some noodles onto the vegetables and prayed to God that this was Regina-standard,  
"kind of looks like shit… probably is shit," I sprinkled some crushed nuts on the top and handed Henry the first plate. He sniffed it and deemed it worthy for his consumption.

"Looks lovely," Regina accepted her plate and followed Henry out into the dining room bit of the kitchen cross lounge room cross dining room.

SQSQSQSQ

"That was good as, Ma," Henry slurped the last of the noodles into his mouth. I swear at some point this child had table manners.

"Regina," Henry used his finger to draw pictures in the sauce left behind, "can I ask you something?"

Regina gave me a concerned look before I nodded.

"Of course," She cleared her throat and placed her knife and fork side by side on the plate.

"So um, like, uh, I don't know how to put this," Henry was nervous, that's for sure. I twirled my noodles and poked it into my mouth as I wondered where the hell he was going with this.

"Try me, dear,"

"Are you…um, like, going to move in or?" I choked on my noodles as Regina's eyes widened, "because, I mean, I'm totally okay with that,"

I swear all the blood that left Regina's face flooded into my cheeks. For the second time I had known Regina, she was lost for words. Hell, I was lost for words. She gaped like a goldfish out of water while her eyes trained themselves onto me.

"As much as I would love to, it's up to your dearest mother,"

Oh great, she's dropped me into the shit. I kept my eyes down as I twisted my fork for another scoop. Suddenly, this didn't look as appetising.

"Well Mum?"

I shoved the fork into my mouth; giving me another good minute to answer Henry's raised eyebrows. I was also pretty sure Regina had stopped breathing because her fingers clutched her knife like she was ready to decapitate me for saying the wrong answer.

"Uh, um," I flicked my eyes over to Regina, hopefully for some help but her glare was like five times worse than Henry's, "kid, I think this is a conversation Regina and I should have alone,"

"So, no…" Henry's shoulders slumped,

"I never said no,"  
"And you never said yes Ms Swan," my girlfriend's nostrils flared. This was totally not fair; both Regina and Henry were ganging up on me. I mean, it's not that I don't want Regina living with me, it was just like…is my house big enough for the three of us? Like, Henry and I are struggling to coexist within this small house already; who knew what havoc would explode with three bodies. Also, _Regina would be living with us_…Regina.

I sighed and accepted the fact I was not getting out this situation alive without muttering a half assed yes.

"Regina Mills," I scooped the woman's hands into mine and now Regina was definitely not breathing. If I wasn't preoccupied with Regina, I would have duct-taped Henry to the chair with the amount of happiness that exploded out of him.

"Y-yes,"

How was I going to word this eloquently, "_Babe_," Ah yes, Ms Charmer, "Can Henry and I move in with you?"

"What!" I couldn't tell who was louder; Regina or my own spawn.

"What the hell Mum!"

"Ms Swan…" Regina squeezed my hands so tightly, they were about to drop off. Suddenly there were tears spilling down her cheeks, "yes! Oh God, yes,"

The original plan was for Regina move here, but hey, what are you going to do.

SQSQSQSQ

The good thing about being me is that I have learnt to live with the uttermost basics. I don't know, maybe being a foster kid taught me how to do that but nonetheless, Henry and I had pretty much all our stuff packed into cardboard boxes over the weekend. My lease on the rental was finishing up soon and the Landlord was more than happy to cut it short. It wasn't that they wanted me out; they just happened to be the most carefree guys I'd ever met when it came to households. Surprisingly, Regina drove the rental truck to my house, and she was dressed in the most exquisitely plain outfit in the history of outfits; denim short shorts, olive green tee shirt and low cut black Converse. She looked simply amazing also with the added bonus of her pushed up sunglasses that acted like a makeshift headband to keep her brunette hair out of her eyes. The wife of the landlord couple arrived – a fiery haired woman by the name of Zelena – and helped me load the last of the boxes into the back of the truck. Regina would've helped but she was too busy convincing Henry that under no circumstances we were having McDonalds for dinner. If Regina thought I was stubborn, my son was a whole other kettle of fish.

Zelena smiled as I handed the keys to the house to her, "all yours Ms West,"

"Thank you, Emma, enjoy living with…Regina, was it?"

"Yeah," I patted the woman on the shoulder and gave the house a sad smile, "Adios house, you were fun,"

SQSQSQSQ

On the way over to our new house, Henry wore Regina down to the possibility of Fish and Chips for dinner instead of McDonalds. As we pulled into the driveway,

"Damn it Mr Swan," Regina huffed and Henry grinned as I shook my head, "_Fine_, Fish and Chips it is, satisfied?"

"Very," Henry giggled as Regina rolled her eyes at me.

"He's your son, isn't he?"

"I did warn you Regina, you cannot wage a war against a Swan and expect to win; we're stubborn,"

"Understatement of the year," Regina pushed open the driver door and glared at Henry who looked like he just got away with eating an entire bar of chocolate.

Even though Regina had accepted the Fish and Chips, apparently I was to be the one to pick it up. By the time I returned back to the house, Regina and Henry had started what looked like a game of poker on the floor of the living room. I shut the door with my hip and held the burning package of wrapped yumminess between my fingers gingerly.

"…okay, so you have what's called a Royal Flush," Regina pointed at the cards in Henry's hand,

"Is that good?"

"Very good," I had to take in this moment because it was so beautiful and fabulous and so good damn domestic, it hurt.

"So are you going to teach the kid how to count cards too?" I sat down onto the floor between the two players and unravelled the paper. Regina just sneered as I popped a chip into my mouth.

"What does card counting mean?"

"Nothing, just eat your stupid Fish and Chips _dear_,"

I squeezed an unhealthy amount of tomato sauce into my corner of the splayed out newspaper and Regina proceeded to dip her chips in it even though she had to capability to get her own sauce corner.

"So what are we doing tomorrow?" Henry cracked salt over the hot chips and stuffed three into his extremely huge gob.

"You are going to school, young man," I titled my head to my son as he whined,

"And so are you Ms Swan," Regina smirked,

"What," I whined, "but I don't want to,"

Henry just laughed as Regina shrugged, "sorry dear, I don't make the rules,"

"But you totally do,"

"Okay maybe I do, but I have already bent them enough for you,"

"But…but…_Blue_," I put on my biggest puppy dog eyes,

"Blue's such a bitch though Regina," Henry muttered as he jammed another lot of chips into his mouth. I motioned to my son,  
"See! Even _Henry_ hates her,"  
"Everybody hates her Ms Swan,"  
"…then why the hell did you hire her?" Henry squished his slice of lemon over a small portion of the fish.

Regina sighed, "I'm starting to think letting you two move in was a bad idea," She grinned as I paled. But before I could even retaliate, Henry threw himself at my girlfriend.

"Don't throw us out Regina, we love you," He screeched as they both fell into a heap onto the carpeted floor. Regina's eyes almost popped out of her head at the physical contact,

"I was joking dear," She patted his back. His head snapped up immediately,

"Oh," Henry sniffed, "I totally knew that,"  
"Of course you did, you little shit," I laughed but I noticed how Regina's hands wrapped protectively around Henry's body; he didn't seem to mind. Her brown eyes never left him and when he nuzzled his face into her neck, she looked up at me and smiled weakly.

Everything in this moment was perfect.

SQSQSQ

a/n: I JUST REALLY WANT MY OWN REGINA, LIKE DAMN IT, I MADE THESE TWO LITTLE BUGGERS SO CUTE AND NOW I WANT THIS FOR MYSELF. DAMN IT ME


	30. Chapter 30

a/n: super sorry about the late update; i had writers block like no one's business! anyway, i was hanging out with this lovely girl called Tanya (who also reads this story) and we came up with three new chapters! yay. this was one of them! so warning, smut smut smut!  
thank you thank you thank you for all the beautiful and hilarious and wonderful reviews i have been receiving! i adore you all! the amount of love i have been shown is overwhelming and it's making me excited to start my other fics i have lined up for you lot.  
Enjoy my dumplings,  
Emma xo (ant1ers. tumblr .com)

SQSQSQSQ

"Wait, I got it,"  
"Oh here we go; everybody calm down, Swan's using her brain,"

"Well whatever she's got has to be better than _your_ ideas Ruby,"

"Shut up Mary Margaret; as Swan and Mill's unofficial wing woman, all my ideas have to be sex based,"

"Is anybody going to actually listen to me or,"

"I'm listening dear,"  
Somehow, Regina, Ruby, Mary Margaret and myself ended up in Ruby's empty classroom, working on 'Operation Blue'. Regina wasn't really meant to be in on it, nor offering suggestions on how to ruin the anti-gay substitute she hired, but hey, here she was.  
Ruby, Mary Margaret and I all sat squished around one of Ruby's desks while Regina paced around trying to think of mildly childish ways to get at Blue. Ruby tapped the desk impatiently as I proudly lifted my arms into the air,

"So what's your ingenious idea Emma?"

I waggled my eyebrows at the pixie haired brunette,

"_We_, as in Regina and I," I motioned to the other brunette who stood with her arms crossed, "totally…should…"  
"Totally should what, dear?" Regina encouraged. I winked at Ruby,

"Bang on Blue's desk,"

"Oh for _fuck_ sake," Regina threw her arms up in exasperation as Mary Margaret banged her head against the table, "in what universe Ms Swan is that even considered _professional_?"

"None, that's why it's so brilliant,"

Ruby just stared at me in awe, "how the fuck did this school even survive without you Swan?"

"Um, we had a pretty good handle on it Ruby," Mary Margaret huffed,

"I agree," Regina said.

"Excuse me, you're meant to be on my side Regina, since when is having sex with me even bad?"

"It's not bad, it's terrific but unprofessional,"  
I turned to my infuriatingly hot girlfriend, "oh and tying me up in your office is deemed pro…" Regina's hand clamped over my mouth in record speed. Mary Margaret looked like a confused little puppy while Ruby grinned ear to ear. Regina didn't let up as she sighed, even when I licked the inside of her palm because that was the most childish thing to possible do.

"Fine, Ms Swan,"

"What!" Ruby and Mary Margaret squealed. Regina released her hold on my lips and I just opened my mouth to say something but was cut off when her forefinger rose into the air,

"But, no actual sex; just kissing,"

"Aw man," I pouted,

"Come on Regina, live a little," Ruby nudged the Principal playfully on the arm, "tap that ass before Blue does with the Lord,"

Mary Margaret, who was all serious face and anti-sex-on-desk-unless-it-was-her-and-David, burst into laughter at Ruby's statement.

"Whatever happens… happens, but I will enter this agreement on the terms that I was originally meant to kiss you…just not what may or may not happen afterwards," Regina stated as Ruby and Mary Margaret giggled like school children.

SQSQSQSQ

How the hell Regina and I were still employed by the Board of Education was beyond me. Especially if we were breaking into other co-workers classrooms and attempting to have sex on their stuff because we both fucking hated the bitch.

Blue Superior's classroom was on the first story of the Literacy block; a dodgy space that was originally used as a storage space for desks and chairs when the lower level of the Science department flooded. Regina had handed her the keys reluctantly and told her to make the space her own for the next five weeks, which meant possible Jesus explosion. But we weren't too surprised when we pushed open the heavy door to reveal what looked like a solemnly used room. The walls were cream coloured with wooden skirtings, the tables wiped down and looking fresh, and the whiteboard looked cleaner than mine did when I first arrived. You could see the particles of dust floating around in the streams of sunlight; it was kind of magical if you just ignored the massive wooden cross on the back wall and the Ten Commandments up above the white board. Blue's desk was impeccably clean and we were about to ruin that.

Regina pushed my butt up against the edge of the desk and her mouth instantly latched onto my neck.

"I'm starting to think this isn't a good idea, Regina," I whispered as Regina kissed down over my collarbones and made her way up the other side of my neck.

"Mm and why's that?"

"What if Blue comes in…"  
"Then we'll have an audience, won't we dear?" Suddenly her hand was undoing my belt and I realised how bad this idea really was.

"You know, like twenty minutes you were _against_ this idea," I stated as Regina's hand slipped in between my legs, massaging the skin of my inner thigh.

"That was until I remembered I was horny,"

Hearing that particular sentence fall from the mouth of Regina Mills was like music to my ears…and tidal waves to my panties. I groaned and Regina smiled knowingly.

"Holy shit Regina, don't say that…"

Regina pushed me hard up against the desk and jammed her thigh between mine,

"What? That I'm _horny_?" Her slight Spanish accent on that word had me weak at the knees.

"Mm," I couldn't even make words as her tongue licked my ear and her hand explored up my stomach,

"That I dripping _wet_ for you…? That I'm thinking of all the naughty things I could do on Blue's desk, hmm,"

Oh God. Oh sweet Jesus, Mother of Mercy. Regina grabbed my hand and slipped it up her pencil skirt. My fingers brushed her core and boy, she wasn't lying.

"All that for you, _Ms Swan_,"

"Jesus you have to stop talking to me like that or I swear to God…"

Regina raised her eyebrow to the massive cross on the back wall, "I'm sure he's going to be listening when I have you screaming my name,"

I was in a relationship with a nymphomaniac. With one sweep, I cleared the shit off of Blue's desk and Regina pushed me back down onto the table.

"Blue's going to kill us," I laughed as Regina pinned my hands up above my head. Her eyes flicked over to the whiteboard and we spotted the same thing at the same time; one of those stupid metre long arse rulers sitting in the ledge bit that held the whiteboard dusters.

"Excellent," Regina peeled off my body, grabbed the ruler and laid herself back down before I could even protest. I reached up to touch her boobs or face or whatever, but she hit the ruler against my knuckles and it hurt like a bitch.

"Bad girls get punished," Regina cooed as she flipped me over onto my front. She yanked down my sport shorts and suddenly the cold wooden ruler was pressed against my butt cheeks. Fuck, she was quick. Regina stepped in between my legs and pushed my thighs wide apart; her thin fingers pressing teasingly against my pussy.

I grasped at her wrists to press them in further but Regina pulled away and smacked the ruler hard against my lower back, again and again until I was pretty sure my butt was bright red. The stuffy room did nothing to alleviate the stinging hotness of my rear end; I'd kill for a breeze. Regina bowed her body over mine and her breath was in my ear,

"Blue might need to burn the desk after I'm done with you," I felt a corner of the ruler poke lightly at my core and I almost came at that single touch.

There was a bang from outside the classroom and some very loud yelling from a very pissed off Leroy. We didn't pay notice, well; I couldn't pay notice while Regina practically had me stringed up for the whole world to see.

Regina lifted the ruler to her mouth and licked off my juices. I moaned at the intoxicated facial expression that danced across Regina's face. She grinned and lowered her hand to my stomach. She didn't need my permission; the woman knew she could have me at any given moment and I wouldn't care. Her fingers entered me and I had to muffle the cry of ecstasy that left my lips.

"Now, now dear, we don't want to alert Ms Superior of our presence, do we?" But that statement didn't lower her enthusiasm. Regina worked at me like her life fucking depended on the fact I had to scream her name…and that I did; over and over, her name fell from my mouth.

Suddenly there was banging on the door.

"Regina! What are you doing in my classroom?"

"Oh shit," I glanced up to the wooden door and thanked the Lord above that Regina locked it. The door rattled in its frame as I quickly yanked up my shorts. Regina in her impractical heels ushered me towards one of the slightly ajar windows.

"Are you kidding me? Out the window, really?" I cursed as Regina pushed the window up, exposing a thick garden bed.

"Regina! Regina, so help me _God_…"

I sat on the windowsill and kissed Regina goodbye as she pulled the window closed,  
"See you tonight dear…"

The door swung inwards as I fell ungracefully out into the bark covered garden bed.

"Regina, what are you doing in my room?" Blue squeaked as I quickly crawled towards one of the bushes. Bits of sharp sticks stuck to my knees as I listened in on the conversation happening above.

"I am the principal, am I not?"

"Well, yes, but…"  
"I'm just seeing how you've laid out your room and to see if it fits to the standards,"  
"And has it?"  
"Of course," I heard the click of Regina's heels fade away, "Also, I was admiring your garden bed, what a lovely job my groundskeeper has done…"

When the classroom door clicked shut, I exhaled loudly but almost regretted it when I heard a pair of non-heeled shoes tap across the linoleum flooring.

"What on Earth happened here?" I heard papers and pens being picked up off the floor. Oh shit, we forgot to clean up. I started crawling away until I heard Blue gasp,

"What on Earth is that wet patch…" shit, shit, shit, crawl, crawl, crawl, "is that…"

I ran out of the garden just as Blue let out an ear piercing scream of pure disgust, "those _lesbians_ procreated on my desk!"

SQSQSQSQ

a/n: THIS FUCKING STORY HAS TURNED INTO LIKE, A CRACK FIC AND I'M NOT EVEN SORRY AHAHA


	31. Chapter 31

a/n: This chapter was hella fun to write tbh. very sorry about the lack of recent updates; I am slowly losing the will to continue this fic weh. It will be finishing soon. BUT HAVE NO FEAR MORE FICS SHALL APPEAR (yay it rhymes). Like, I am not even joking, I have like FIVE NEW ONES. The summary of them all are up on my account/profile if you'd like to see what they're all about! STEAL THE IDEAS AND I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN; I AM AUSTRALIAN THAT'S HOW WE GATHER FOOD...BY HUNTING.  
I'm joking omfg but okay! so the tense is messed up in this chapter, I can only apologise, meep.  
Um so yeah, time to get some more sass in with these characters!  
Enjoy!  
You can find me at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L is a 1)  
Emma xo

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It was getting to the end of term and I was done; so done with these stupid children and stupid Blue and stupid need to wake up at some crazy hour in the morning because I was now living with fucking Regina who got to school at like, the crack of dawn. Some mornings Regina left without me, some mornings we'd leave together and then some mornings, like this morning, Henry would wake us up because we had such a vigorous session of sex the night before, we both crashed. Henry was never subtle when he woke up; no light tap on the door to see if we were awake or dressed, just full on, throw the door open and throw himself onto the bed.

"Jesus Christ," I gasped as his knees collided with my stomach and the top end of him hit Regina in the hip.

"Get up, get up, and get the hell up,"

"Five more minutes," Regina rolled onto her side and pulled the covers up around her chin.

"Regina, get up, you have work," Henry curled his fingers around the edge of the blanket and yanked it down. Praise the Lord that Regina had actually gotten redressed after last night because that would have been embarrassing. One of Regina's eyes popped open as she curled up into ball,

"Mr Swan, put the covers back on me or so help me, I'll give you two weeks of detention," Henry clambered on top of Regina and wrapped himself around her like a human blanket, "Emma, get this thing off of me,"

"Mm, nah," I scooped up her portion of the blankets and made myself a grand nest that I nuzzled into while my girlfriend fended off my child.

"Emma… if you don't, you get two weeks of supervised work with Blue Superior,"

That got me motivated. I tackled Henry so hard that we both fell off the bed and onto the floor with a loud thump while Regina hummed with glee as she readjusted herself for another twenty minutes of sleep.

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"Why does Regina get to sleep in and we don't," Henry whined as I pulled into the school car park.

"Because Regina's boss; how many times do I have to explain that to you kid," I glared at Blue's car as I parked my bug next to Regina's spot.

"But I want to sleep in,"

"I think we all want to sleep in," I slammed the door shut and locked it as Henry pulled his school bag onto his back.

"Bring it in kid," I wrapped my arm around Henry's shoulders just as a wild Blue appeared pacing into the car park.

"Morning Ms Superior," Henry chimed as he peeled himself off of me. Blue sneered at me as per usual but let loose a sickly sweet smile at Henry,

"Good morning Henry, nice to see you bright and early,"

I've come to the conclusion that Blue was definitely more annoying before eight in the morning; I probably found her even more annoying than usual because I had to leave the house without a coffee. No thanks to Regina.

"Oh you know, Mum drops me off," Henry shrugged casually but Blue's eyes almost doubled in size.

"I'm sorry; your Mother drops you off?"

"That'd be me Blue," I wrapped my arm around Henry's shoulders again and gave them a slight squeeze. Blue's eyes narrowed immediately,

"You're Henry's Mother?"

"Well, yeah. I thought the last name was a dead giveaway,"

"But…but…but," Blue was struggling for words but my darling son stepped in for her,

"Mum's gay, yeah," Blue's cheeks turned bright red as she cleared her throat, "she didn't used to be, but now she is. Does that concern you Ms Superior?"

Jesus my kid had balls of steel.

"No, nope of course not Henry, I was just a little…confused, that's all,"

Henry nodded, "Well now we've cleared things up. See you later Miss," My son stormed off in the direction of my staffroom and I had never been prouder.

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"Shit Hen, are you nuts?" I squeaked as he stood outside the door to the staffroom. I typed in the code and he followed me in,

"What?"  
"Superior will have your ass,"  
"No she won't; she's _scared_ of Regina,"  
"Everybody's scared of Regina," I clarified as Henry sat down on my chair and started spinning around.

"You're not,"

"Yeah," I grabbed one of my energy drinks from the fridge and cracked it open, "I'm not,"

The bell rang loud and clear, and Henry groaned.

"Come on Mister, you've got class,"

"So do you," he pointed to my schedule which I had taped down to the desk, "you've got History,"

I sneered at that word, "Gross, History,"

Suddenly the staffroom door banged open and a very happy looking Ruby burst through,

"Guess who got fucking _laid_ last night!"

"Jesus Christ Ruby, there is a _child_ in the room," I sipped at my drink as Henry zipped up his bag,

"Oh, hey Henry,"  
"Hey Ms Lucas," Henry rolled his eyes as Ruby scratched her head awkwardly, "see you in Art Miss,"

"Uh, yeah, see you then,"

"You could've bloody warned me," Ruby growled as Henry left the room.

"…Genuinely didn't think you'd come in here announcing it to the world," I got together my stuff for my next class as a slow stream of teachers entered the room. Everyone else didn't have class except for Ruby and I this morning so we left together; Ruby yakking in explicit detail of her sexual adventures last night.

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"Emma, you've got a special delivery!"

Mary Margaret waggled a pink envelope in my face as I stepped back into the staffroom after a horrendous History lesson with the children from Hell. I sighed and snatched the letter from Mary's hands just as Regina came through the doors.

"Morning dear," Regina kissed my cheek as I grunted in response, "have a good lesson?"

"Nope, have a good sleep in?"

Regina grinned ear to ear as I dumped my stuff onto my desk, "of course; once you two Swans left, there was some peace and quiet,"

"I feel like that was an insult; should I be insulted?"

"Yes,"

I sat down at my table and flipped the letter over, reading the scrawl on the front.

"What's that?" Regina ran her fingers over the front of the envelope before Leroy crashed through the door, scaring the pants off of everyone.

"Sorry guys,"

"Regina! Can I talk to you for a sec?" Astrid kind of appeared out of thin air and before Regina could object, the woman grabbed her bicep and pulled her out of the staffroom. Mary Margaret scooted her chair over and smiled as I tried to decipher the writing on the front.

"What does it say?" I mumbled as I brought the letter real close to my eye,

"It's a swan,"

"Oh," I pulled it back and yes, Mary Margaret was correct; a very shit drawing of a Swan graced it.

"Well, open it,"

"What if it's like a bomb or something?" I said as I ripped open the top.

"Too late now…"

A brown and green card fell from the ripped envelope; it was covered in different species of birds and I thought it was pretty nifty.

"Read it, read it, what does it say," the tiny brunette woman practically begged me as I flipped the card open. It took me a few seconds to adjust to the fact it was written in an entirely different language; French.

'_To Swan, I don't know if your last name is spelt with one N or two N's but anyway, I would just like to say that I am thankful you turned up at Story Brooke College; I'm very glad you're here. Love from a secret admirer_'

"Oh shit," My eyes widened, "holy shit," I reread the card. I didn't recognise the writing and it certainly didn't have any sort of flow like an average teacher's handwriting should. It was a student.

"What does it say?" Mary Margaret scrunched up her nose, "I can't read French,"  
"It…it says…" I heard Regina huff behind me and Mary Margaret beat me to the punch,

"Emma's got a secret admirer!"

The Principal plucked the card from my fingers and read it.

"It's in French dear, do you mind translating…"

I cleared my throat as the staffroom door swung open. The overly large head of Ms Blue Superior and the smallish pretty one of Ruby appeared briefly over the shoulder of Leroy and disappeared around the corner to where I suspected their desks were.

"Um, it says 'to Swan, blah, blah, blah, very thankful you are at Story Brooke College, love from a secret admirer'",

"Hmm, it seems that Ms Blanchard is correct," Regina handed the card back.

"Wait, what's happening people?" Ruby plopped herself down on the edge of my desk and stole one of the mints I stashed behind my books.

"Emma's got a student crush!" Mary Margaret repeated,

"Oh how charming; if it's a _girl_ this school is definitely going downhill," Blue rolled her eyes and fetched her tuna sandwich from the fridge,

"Shut it Superior," Ruby snapped as she snatched the card from my hands. Her eyes flicked over the writing and her face crumpled.

"Fuck,"

"Ruby," Regina chastised, "you have a mouth of a sailor,"

But it looked like Regina's insult fell on deaf ears. Ruby's eyes scanned the note again, her eyes looking slightly wild and crazed.

"Oh no, oh no, no, no,"

"What now?" Regina sighed as Blue made a point of un-wrapping her sandwich loudly and biting into its obviously crisp lettuce based goodness.

"Tom wrote this,"

"What!" Mary Margaret, Regina and I screeched.

"You've got to be _joking_ Ms Lucas," Regina seethed. Ruby locked eyes with me,

"Who's Tom?" Blue piped up,

"Shut your pie hole Blue and go back to your _damn_ fish sandwich," I was rather surprised when that statement fell from the very lips of Mary Margaret Blanchard. Regina smirked slightly at the blushing pixie haired teacher and then turned her attention to Ruby who was now in what looked like the beginning stages of a mental breakdown.

"So you're telling me, Tom, your brother, likes me?" I whispered but Ruby shook her head.

"No, no, that's not it," I had never seen the woman so pale in all my life…and I mean, Ruby was a pale kind of gal in the first place anyway.

"Okay," I slammed the card down and threw my hands out to clear the space, "Can someone please explain what the _hell_ is going on because I am confused as _fuck_; how many other Swans are there at this damn school?" I stared at Regina, who was already trying to figure out the answer to that question,

"It's only you and…_Henry_," she said my son's name in a breathy whisper and if it was humanly possible, Ruby went whiter as she nodded solemnly.

"I am still really confused, why would Tom send a message like this to Henry, I mean… _oh_," a tiny light bulb went off in Mary Margaret's head.

"Tom…_Tom_ he's still curious and he told me he liked Henry but I didn't say anything because I was worried how you'd take it and anyway, he and Henry were fighting over that Claudia girl and I don't know man, everything's confusing," the words tumbled out of Ruby's mouth before she could put a filter on them.

"Henry knows French?" Mary Margaret tilted her head,

"No, that was all Google Translate; he just wanted to impress..."

"Wait, wait, wait; are you saying your brother Tom, has a crush on Henry?" I was so confused.

"Yes,"

"Great, so there's more of you _disgusting_ individuals in this school," Blue shoved the corner of her sandwich into her mouth and before I even realised that was offensive, Ruby spun around and punched Ms Superior so hard in the jaw, her tuna sandwich flew out her hand and splattered against the back wall.

Blue tumbled out of her chair and I quickly raced forward and wrapped my arms around Ruby's chest before she could do any more damage,

"You fucking _bitch_, that's my _brother_ you're talking about! How fucking _dare_ you!" Ruby screamed. Blue wiped the blood from her mouth and looked up at Regina for support,  
"Aren't you going to do something Regina? Arrest her! _Fire_ her, do _something_!"

But Regina – bless her cotton socks – stood with her hands on her hips and glared down at the pitiful excuse of a teacher,

"You insulted my girlfriend's child and one of my best students in this school. On the day of your arrival, I stated that this was an open minded school, so no, I will not arrest Ruby nor punish her for her behaviour," She squatted down to Blue's height, "You, on the other hand, can get the _fuck_ out of my staffroom because I do not, and will not, tolerate bullying like that,"

Blue scrambled to her feet and fled the room like her Nun-like skirt was on fire.

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a/n: kinda just made this bit up for shits and gigs because who doesn't like a little bit of confusion omfg. plus, angry regina...


	32. Chapter 32

**a/n: do people even read these little notes? no? okay. anyway, sorry for late update. umm, so yeah. **  
**ENJOY**

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"Regina!"

I threw myself at the Regina shaped lump occupying the majority of our bed. She groaned and rolled into a human version of a nugget.

"Regina,"  
"Mm," I pulled the covers from Regina's body and marvelled at the silky slate grey pyjamas she donned.

"It's Saturday and do you know what that means?"

"If you mention something about a sleep in I will wholeheartedly agree dear," Her voice was sleepy and she tried prying the blankets from my fingers.

"Nope," I popped my lips on the P, "it means, rise and shine motherfucker,"

Okay, yeah, maybe that sort of language wasn't the best idea when it came to Regina Mills but hey, it got her moving…even though at the pace of a _snail_, moving nonetheless.

"Must you swear at this god forsaken hour?"

I hummed and nuzzled my head underneath Regina's arm, resting myself against the woman's glorious boobs.

"Yes, because it gets you moving,"

"What time is it anyway?"

"Around nine thirty," Regina's eyes snapped open and her grip around my shoulders tightened,

"Shit," She threw herself off the bed and disappeared into her walk in closet.

"What?" I flopped down onto the soft sheets and groaned, "what is it Regina?"  
"I'm late!" she squeaked,

"For what," I rattled my brain for any sort of plans either she or both of us had planned,

"Work Ms Swan, I am late for work," Regina wrestled her slim body into her infamous slate dress and tottered to the bathroom as she slipped a heel on,  
"Regina it's Saturday,"

"What?"

"I did say that to you earlier,"  
"And you assumed I listened to you dear," Regina relaxed considerably and flung her heel off as she leaned against the doorframe.

"Well yeah, my voice is pure sex,"  
Regina's cheeks pinked, "yes, yes it is,"

I sent a goofy grin her way as I crawled into the middle of the bed, wrapping the sheets around my body.

"So what's on the agenda today?"

"Shopping,"

I rolled onto my back as Regina rolled her eyes.

"My pantry is full Ms Swan,"  
"Not food shopping…"  
Regina eyed me suspiciously as she ran her fingers over my section of the wardrobe, "you don't need any more clothes…nor shoes,"

"Not clothes shopping,"

"All my furniture is fine,"  
"Not furniture, but I mean, if you want to take a trip to Ikea to get a new couch, I'm all for it…"  
"My couch is fine!"  
"Is it? Is it _really_?"

Regina huffed and crossed her arms, "where are you going with this?"  
I got onto my knees and flourished my arms into the air, "stationary shopping!"

Regina blanked, "pardon dear?"

"I said," I threw my arms once again into the air, "stationary shopping,"

"_Stationary shopping_…"

"Yep,"

"Why?"

"Um, because if I am going to be head of department, I'm going to need some sick arse pens and shit to keep my rep up,"

"You have no reputation,"  
"Being the coolest teacher in all of Story Brooke? Pretty sure that's some serious rep to uphold babe,"

Regina just glared.

"Fine Ms Swan, but Henry is coming,"

I saluted the woman as she turned on her heel and disappeared down the hallway.

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Twenty minutes later and one misplaced set of car keys, Regina, me and the kid all drove down into town to the huge office supply super store. Both Henry and Regina sported the dull expression as Regina pulled into the parking lot,

"Why aren't you excited Regina? This is going to be so fun!"

"Mum, its stationary… calm down,"  
"I agree," Regina mumbled as she locked the Mercedes. Heaven forbid Regina drive anywhere in my Bug.

"I will not calm down," I practically wiped my hands on the massive '50 percent off' sale sign that stuck onto the front door, "Look! Sale!"

Henry rolled his eyes as the automatic doors beeped open and we were engulfed in stationary heaven.

Regina took my hand like a mother would to an eager child, and handed Henry a basket. But Henry just shook his head and motioned to one of the shopping carts. Regina nodded silently and walked me down the different isles as I 'oohed' in excitement at different things.

"Look, notebooks!"

"No dear," Regina squeezed my hand,

"Are you sure?"  
"Yes,"  
"Not even one?"

"No,"

"Damn it," I pouted as Regina froze.

"Fuck yeah!" We had reached the aisle I wanted the most in this shop; pens.

"Mum!"

"You have the mouth of a sailor,"

But I wasn't listening. In front of me was a whole aisle _dedicated_ to pens, and not just any old type of pens; gel-pens, four colour pens, pens you can erase, all sorts of fun stuff.

"Has your Mother _always_ had an obsession with pens?" I tried to listen in on their conversation but I was distracted by a multi coloured gel pen.

"Ooh, shiny," I drew a little flower on a scrap bit of paper to check the ink.

"Eh, yeah sort of, but it's something you get used to,"

"I see…"

I grabbed four different varieties of the gel pen and dumped them in the ever growing pile of random shit that I probably did not need but wanted.

"When I was a kid, Mum used to bring me home these colouring in sheets and like…" I pulled a cap off one of the smelly markers and stuffed it under my nose; strawberry, "like…not let me do them because she was too fascinated with the pens,"

"In other words, she'd just colour them in herself,"  
"Pretty much,"

I picked a seven pack of smelly markers off the shelf and threw them in the trolley with expert precision.

"I'm essentially in a relationship with a child,"  
"Pretty much yeah, but like, in a non-weird sort of way," Henry admired a shimmery ruler and stuck it back down. Regina just stared at the trolley, bemused.

"I'm surprised you're able to control yourself Regina," I quipped as I studied the '2 for 1' deal in front of me.

"And why is that my dear?"

"Come off it Regina; stationary shops are like crack to teachers,"

Henry groaned as Regina tittered,

"Mum what the hell,"  
"Crack…to _teachers_? Honestly Ms Swan, your analogies astound me,"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," I grabbed the front of the trolley and guided it to the check out.

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"How you managed to spend over two hundred dollars on pens is mind-boggling,"

The boot of Regina's car was chock-a-block filled with random bits and pieces I had managed to sneak in the trolley, plus with added pens. I was fat and happy with my purchases, however, Henry, who was practically drowning in the back seat with all the plastic bags, was not.

Regina hadn't shut up about my impulse buying since we left the store.

"Two hundred _dollars_…on _pens_, why," Regina huffed we pulled into Mifflin; there was another car there that was not my Bug, but a pale blue Getz.

"Why on Earth is Ms Blanchard in my driveway?"

I was just as confused as Regina. I hopped out the car, leaving my bags in there, and jogged up to the driver's side of the Getz. Mary Margaret leaned against the door, nervously tapping her phone in her palm.

"Mary Margaret?"

The pixie haired History teacher jumped at the sound of her name and her eyes went wide.

"Emma, I, uh, hello,"

As bad as this sounded, I couldn't help but notice Blanchard was very stylishly dressed; a loose white tee shirt, cropped boyfriend jeans and black flats.

"Is…is um, Regina here?"

"Ms Blanchard what is the meaning of this?" Regina fumed.

"It's Blue; we've got a problem…"

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As much as Regina would have probably liked to have _not_ invited the History teacher into her house, I let the clearly nervous woman in.

Regina turned the kettle on as Mary Margaret lowered herself into one of the stools that surrounded the kitchen island.

"What happened?" I rested a reassuring hand on Mary Margaret's shoulder and she slid her phone onto the countertop.

"She called me, drunk,"

"And," Regina fetched three mugs from the cupboard and portioned out the coffee and sugars,

"White and one please, but Blue called me, drunk off her face, abusing me,"

Blanchard clicked the recording button on her phone and an oddly familiar voice rang out,

"You stupid bitch, siding with those lesbians…you're all going to burn in hell, you know that? You and your co-workers and that stupid boyfriend of yours Mary Margaret…" there was a sob and a clink of glass, "Mary Margaret…like Virgin Mary, you should be against this! That's what Jesus would do,"

Regina raised her hand to silence it and we were all left in the quiet.

"The woman's crazy Regina," Mary Margaret pleaded. Regina was definitely mulling over what to do,

"Where's going to have to get Sidney to fire her,"

Mary Margaret gasped as I scrunched up my face in confusion, "wait, who's this Sidney dude?"

Regina chewed on her thumbnail; something I had never seen the woman do, "Sidney Glass, head chairman of the Board of Education,"

"He's the big guns basically," Mary Margaret clarified, "if you want something done right away, you let the guy know,"

"Ah, I see, so, Blue is out?"

"Ms Superior will be so far out no institution of Education will _ever_ hire her again, and I can bet you that she will never ever get a job easily with such disgusting remarks and actions like that,"

Regina meant business as she pulled out her phone from her pocket. I turned to Mary Margaret as Regina pressed the phone to her ear. I wanted to lighten the mood,

"Guess what? I just spent two hundred dollars at the stationary shop,"

Mary Margaret's eyes popped open wider, "on _what_?"

I shrugged, "pens,"

Before Mary Margaret could respond, Regina cleared her throat, "Ms Blanchard, are you able to send that recording?"  
"Of course," She picked up her phone as Regina relayed a mobile phone number to her,

"Mr Glass, Ms Blanchard is now sending you the file…"

Mary Margaret's phone beeped and I could hear the muffled voice of a Mr Sidney Glass through the phone,

"So much for her contract to be over in three weeks," I mused. Regina finished the call and had the biggest grin plastered on her face,

"After her contract here, that bitch will never be able to get work at a school ever again,"

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	33. Chapter 33

a/n: OKAY HELLO HOW ARE WE TODAY? good? good. Sorry guys, I have had so much motherfucking shit goin' on in my life right now so yeah, sorry.  
So much shit is happening in this chapter so just bare (bear? idk) with me okie dokie? a little bit of RedBeauty and WEED. Fun.  
Also to clear up some AIR! I AM AUSTRALIAN SO MY SPELLING IS BRITISH AND THIS STORY IS SET IN MAINE, AMERICA NOT AUSTRALIA. I have tried to Americanize it to the best of my ability but hey ho.  
Anyway, this chapter is kinda dedicated to my homie gal, Tanya, who suggested this chapter AND the next one.  
Um, if you have any questions or would like to rant or fangirl or like, whatever, totally hit me up at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L is a 1 fyi) I'm pretty nice, I guess idk.  
ANYWAY ENJOY MY DUMPLINGS.  
Emma xox

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I wouldn't be surprised if we were visited by Noah and his goddamn Arc by the amount of rain that was pounding against the roofs of Story Brooke College. And if anyone knew _anything_ about schools, rain meant hell. Literally, did children not know what a fucking umbrella was? Or you know, using the covered walk ways from class to class? Too many times have I been graced with sopping wet students who claimed it was 'an accident' while wiping off hair that's been pasted to their pimply foreheads.

I walked beside Regina as we trudged our way through the grounds to the library; Regina did her usual thing of waving her wrist at students like she had a wand, telling them off. I held her mega huge arse umbrella in one hand and my pile of marking to my chest with the other. Regina's lanyard bounced on her chest as she ascended the three steps to the library; we kicked aside soaking wet pairs of black school shoes in the process.

"Morning Regina, Morning Swan," Belle waved at us as Regina primped her hair and I shook the umbrella free from droplets, "Can't wait for the rain to stop so the kids can bugger off,"

Regina gave the Australian a forced smile and sauntered her way into the back area.

"What's up with Mills?" Belle grabbed my wrist delicately, "aye Swan,"

"Ugh, you know, that time of the year when she's got to sort out returning staff for next year and shit, just crappy Principal stuff, you know?"

Belle nodded, "yeah, true, I understand. Well I've already emailed her back my contract for next year so hopefully I'll be sweet,"

"Don't worry Belle, I'll make sure you keep your job; perks of dating the Principal," I winked at her as she furrowed her eyebrows. I followed her glare and noticed that Regina had shooed a small bunch of boys from a pair of plush couches and dusted off the worn leather with her dainty hand.

"Probably just sassed the fuck out of those boys," I giggled as Belle rolled her eyes,

"Right-oh, go please your little girlfriend Swan, and make sure at least a decent amount of staff keep their jobs," I gave the librarian a thumbs up and sauntered over to where I presumed Regina was dabbing the leather with a sanitized wipe.

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"Next up, Lucas, Ruby," Regina sighed as she rubbed her temples. I looked up from my game of Angry Birds and popped a bubble with my pink gum,

"Definite yes,"

"You two are best friends, of course you are going to say yes,"

"Well, yeah, _duh_,"

"I think I remember her talking about transferring schools or something…" Regina jotted something down on Ruby's contract as my eyes widened,

"No! She can't do that!" I clicked pause on my game and switched to Messages.

'_Ruby I know you have spares, get your fine ass down to the library_,'

Regina glared at me as my phone pinged,

'_We have a library?_'

'_Oh my actual God Ruby; it's the whole first floor of the History block. Just go there,_'

"What are you smiling at?"

"Ruby," I muttered as I pocketed the phone into my jeans, "doesn't know where the library is..."

"I'm not surprised at that,"

There was a loud bang from just outside the library and both Regina and I rolled our eyes because we both knew it was Ruby.

"Ow fuck, what is this place?"

Yep, that was definitely Ruby. I got up and ambled over to the entrance as Ruby peeled off her red raincoat and shook it,

"Morning little red riding hood," I motioned to the raincoat in her arms and Ruby poked her tongue out at me.

"What the _fuck_ is this place Swan?"

"It's called a library and it holds books,"

"Yes thank you Sargent Sarcasm," Ruby flattened loose strands of hair as she climbed the steps. I pulled her inside to the heavily air-conned building and herded her towards Regina,

"Whoa, hold up," I glanced over to Ruby who had her eyes trained at the librarian's desk, "who the hell is that fine piece of ass?"

As if Belle had been summoned, she glanced up at Ruby's crude comment. I think Ruby had gone limp at my side.

"Oh shit, check her eyes out, oh my god, what the hell…and her hair, wow," I practically dragged Ruby away as Belle blushed.

"You probably don't want to hear her speak then,"  
"What why? Oh my god, please tell me she has an accent…"

"Yeah,"

Ruby made the same noise I supposed a dog would make in mating season; a low grunt.

"If you two are done ogling at Ms French, I'd like to gain your attention to some paperwork," Regina cleared her throat.

"Oh right, hey Regina," Ruby scratched the bridge of her nose and plopped down in front of the Principal.

"Good morning Ms Lucas," Regina leaned over and flicked through the files as Ruby stole glances at Belle. Damn my girlfriend had an awesome rack. "Emma would you like to explain to Ruby what I had just shared with you?"

Ruby looked at me suspiciously as I turned to her, "um yeah, what the fuck, are you transferring schools?"

Regina hung her head momentarily at my wording as Ruby's eyes bulged out her head,

"What? No? Who told you that? I mean, if you aren't going to keep me for next year then sure, I'll leave but no, I'm not leaving intentionally,"

"Awesome,"

"Can I ask though, who told you I was moving," Ruby cocked her head slightly as Regina squished her stamp into a red ink pad and slammed it hard onto Ruby's contract; it said 'approved'.

"No, no matter; just stupid of me to even listen to the foolish woman anyway,"

"Blue," Ruby and I whispered at the same time. Regina nodded her head solemnly as she flicked to the next profile,

"Next up, Mumford, Jordan…"

Ruby sighed and stood up; tucking her red singlet into her black jeans, "See you 'round Mills,"

I watched Ruby strut up to the desk and start a conversation with Belle.

"Can we like hire teachers who are not hot? Or like _gay_?"

I watched Regina watch Ruby and Belle, and her frown darkened, "Ms Swan…"

I turned my attention to the two love birds over at the desk and I caught a glimpse of Ruby scribbling something done and Belle looking like a human version of a tomato.

"What_ the_…"

Ruby giggled, waved at the librarian and waltzed on out while Belle looked like she was about to combust and explode into a puddle of lovesick goo.

"Oh no," Regina sighed and shook her head as Belle bit her lip,

"Did Ruby do what I think she did?"

"Give our lovely librarian her mobile phone number? Yes, yes she did dear,"

"Fucking hell Ruby…"

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If this morning's fiasco with Ruby and Belle _wasn't_ interesting enough, Regina sent me a text mid lunch break but sadly said lunch break was actually a detention for my shitty History class. No matter how many times I yelled or threatened with detentions, these little motherfuckers didn't seem to get the picture.

'_Come to my office, I have a surprise_'.

I rolled my eyes and briefly imagined Regina dressed in only a garter and my mouth watered.

'_If it's anything other than you stark naked, I won't be coming'_ I replied. I giggled at my slight sexual innuendo and dropped the phone onto my lap as the class did a massive collective sigh.

"Come on Miss, let us go,"  
"Do you guys ever learn? This is an open minded school yet you lot still make fun of Regina and I,"

"It's funny,"

"Oh so a dozen detentions is fun for you?"

"No,"

"Then I suggest you lot shut your traps and learn,"

My phone buzzed again.

'_Trust me dear, this is so much more wonderful than me naked_'

What the hell could be more fabulous that Regina naked? Wait, was that other hot Sports teacher Ms Aurora Sleep naked there too? Oh boy, this could be interesting.

'_Okay, give me five; I have a detention to deal with right now_,'

I locked the phone, crossed my arms and death started the children for the next five minutes until I could leave this god forsaken classroom and return into the pounding rain.

SQSQSQ

I made it to Regina's office in record time, and by record time I mean run through the flooded grounds, push Granny out the way, which ended in her slapping me upside the head with her compact umbrella, and into Regina's very stylish office.

"Sit," Regina motioned to the chair in front of her desk. I sat, leaving small puddles by my conversed feet. In front of Regina was a thick red leather bound book that had a slight bulge in the middle. What the fuck was going on? Why was she ordering me around? Hell we lived together.

"So I ran into our little friend Blue this afternoon…" She had the same smirk on her face like she does just before she 'tops' me in sex.

"Oh, and?" She pushed the book closer to me with the tip of her Biro. She slotted the pen where the pages lifted,

"She caught someone doing something very _stupid_…" Regina sighed, clearly adding dramatics to the whole situation, "and her being the wonderful teacher that she is, reported it to me immediately,"

"I have no idea where this is going babe, so like, um yeah…"

But obviously she wasn't listening as she lifted the heavy pages and the book fell open. My mouth went dry at the sight.

"How…?"

"Just because this is one of the finest schools in the state of Maine, that doesn't mean we are safe from this kind of behaviour,"

The bulge was something I hadn't seen in a while; marijuana, and an absolute _fuck tonne_ of it, in a plastic zip-lock bag.

"Holy shit," I picked up the weed and put my nose to it. The smell was magnificent.

"Holy shit indeed, dear,"

"Why are you telling me this?" I gave the stuff one last whiff and handed back to Regina who popped it on top of the book. Why the fuck it was in the book in the first place was beyond me, but hey, Regina does what Regina does.

"What would say if this was to not be officially reported and say, I don't know _accidentally_ slipped into my purse?"

"I would say you are the coolest fucking Principal I have ever worked for…and dated,"

Regina nodded her head in acknowledgement and held the offending packet in between her delicate fingers. She pulled her handbag out of the drawer beside her, clicked it open,

"Whoops," it fell with a loud thump into her bag, "oh dear, how clumsy of me,"

"Jesus Christ Regina…" I groaned as she zipped her bag back up and dumped it on the desk beside her. There was a sudden knock on the door,

"Come in Henry,"

Wait, what? Why was Henry here?

"Uh hey Ms Mills," my son scratched at his soaking wet hair and closed the door behind him, "oh hey Ma,"

"Hey kid," I was so confused, "why are you here?"

"Well, um, I tried texting you and you didn't reply so I texted Regina and she said you were with her so yeah, here I am,"

I glanced at my phone; two unread messages from Henry. "Oh, sorry,"

"Anyway, um, now that you're both here, is it cool if I go to Claudia's tonight for dinner? I mean, her dad will drop me home and stuff,"

Regina smiled sweetly at me and nudged her handbag with her elbow. Ah, the _weed_.

"Yeah sure, cool; we can pick you up, you know? We both have cars,"

"Yeah but you're both teachers and that's weird, I mean, Mum you teach Claudia in Sport…"

"Oh…right I forgot," I scrunched up my nose in distaste as Regina smirked, "it's not cool to have a Mum who's a teacher,"

"Uh, yeah…anyway, can I go?" His eyes darted between Regina and I,

"Yeah sure, just text the address and what time you're home,"

"Wow, really? Cool! Thanks Mum!" Henry wrapped his wet arms around my shoulders and then gave Regina a quick hug. Regina stiffened slightly at the cold contact but softened when he planted a smooch on her temple.

"Okay, see you later on tonight,"

"Okay, bye!" Regina waved him off and he disappeared out the door and back into the school yard.

"So Ms _Swan_…" Regina focused her attention back onto me while trying to air out the parts of her dress where Henry had hugged her.

"Yes, Ms _Mills_?" I put on a proper fancy accent just to fuck her over. She glared at me,

"How'd you like to get baked with me this evening?"

I took her hand and kissed the back of it, "I'd be honoured,"

SQSQSQ

a/n: this chapter was also mildly inspired by those Drunk!Regina comics on tumblr by a girl who i THINK is called lastthing-ido ... don't quote me on that. anyway, y'all know what's ah-happenin' next chapter ahaha.  
weeeee


	34. Chapter 34

**a/n**: I know I have said this many a-time, but this fic will be ending soon and by soon, this is the second last chapter. I repeat, **THERE IS ONLY ONE MORE CHAPTER UNTIL THIS BAD BOY IS FINISHED**. Do not fret though, I have heeeeeeaps of fics planned out for you lot :) a lot of them will be written in the same way Bad Teachers has been, so like funny (apparently this fic is funny so yay for me!) and sarcastic and most importantly, SWANQUEEN.  
**Please check out my profile on here to see what fics I have lined up** (they aren't in order fyi, just all randomly put).  
This chapter is dedicated to Tanya who suggested this idea and who has also put up with all the shit I have put her through, god bless ya.  
If you'd like to chat to me or whatever, I do have tumblr. You can find me at ant1ers. tumblr. com (the L in antlers in a one (1) fyi)  
I just want to say thank you to you all for all your wonderful reviews/comments and inboxes/messages, you all are such great people and you all inspire me to keep going and finally fulfill my dream of writing an actual book! :)  
Emma xox

SQSQSQ

"Swan out!"

I scooped up the work spread out on my desk into some sort of pile and squished it to my chest as the clock ticked over to three o'clock.

"Keen to be somewhere, aye Emma?" Ruby looked up from her work and smiled as I shoved all the marking into a recyclable shopping bag. I winked at her as Blue waltzed through the door looking like someone had set a fire cracker off inside her butt. Ruby rolled her eyes as the hard core Christian made a point of sighing loudly and dumping her things onto her pristine clean desk right beside Ruby.

"Damn straight; Regina's got a present for me," Ruby waggled her eyebrows suggestively, "no Ruby, not like that," The Art teacher pouted as she circled an incorrect word on one of her student's essays and took a swig from her metal water bottle.

"Care to elaborate?" Ruby smacked her lips together and stretched up as David and Mary Margaret pushed through into the staffroom, shaking off loose drops of rain. I waved to the love birds, which by some miracle, had convinced Regina that having their tables together was beneficial, which was beyond me because they spent their time kissing each other over the tables. But to be fair, I'd probably do that to Regina as well if she didn't have her own supremely excellent office.

"Nope," I glanced at Blue who had stuffed her lanyard into her drawer and exited the building without looking back or saying goodbye to anyone.

"Oh thank fuck," Ruby exhaled loudly and let her head loll back. I smelt vodka.

"Ruby… is that vodka?" I stared at the silver bottle on her desk.

"Maybe," Ruby grabbed the bottle before I could and held it close to her chest, "what? You inspired me that one time when you drank with Mary Margaret,"  
"That was the worst mistake ever!" Mary Margaret chided,

"Whatever, I'm like, half smashed anyway, whoa," Ruby massaged her temples as Astrid shook her head in disgust, "anyway, crazy bitch has left, so what are you and Regina really doing?"

"Weed," I shrugged my shoulders,

"Dude…"  
"Yeah,"  
"That's fucking _awesome_, oh my god. I never thought Regina would be the type,"  
"Dude, she's the fucking Principal of Story Brooke High, the most…"  
"One of the most elite high schools in Maine, blah, blah, blah, _whatever_," Ruby made the talking mouth motion with her hand and rolled her eyes, "okay _fine_, your fine ass girlfriend can get her hands on all the weed she wants, I get it,"

I laughed as Ruby tipped her head back and downed a good amount of the vodka.

"Meanwhile, this hot piece of ass has got a date with another hot piece of ass," Ruby winked as the tell-tale Australian librarian peeked through the staffroom door.

"Hey!" Ruby stood up abruptly and banged her knee on her table, "holy shit," she stumbled backwards and I reached out to grab her.

"Whoa, we have a staffroom? When did this happen?" Belle came up to both of us as Ruby massaged her knee,

"I'd ask the same thing about the library,"

"No school can be without a library," Belle put her hands on her hips, "some schools have multiple staffrooms,"  
"Thank god this place doesn't,"

"Uh, we actually do," I mumbled as Ruby kissed Belle's cheek.

"What!"

"Yeah, the Head of Departments have their own,"

"I've been here four years and I've never seen this so called Head of Department staffroom,"

"Why do you think you never see what's-his-name Killian Jones or whatever? He's head of Science,"

Ruby pouted, "Aw man, I just thought he was some hot shot the school hired on a casual basis," Belle cleared her throat, "but here we have an even _hotter_ shot the school has hired permanently, yay for Ms French!" Ruby clapped her hands together quickly as I hooked my bag over my shoulder and headed out the staffroom,

"See you lot tomorrow alright?"

"Have fun with your girlfriend Swan," Ruby cried as Belle wrapped one arm around the Art teacher's slim waist.

SQSQSQ

"Please tell me again why, oh _why_, we are using my perfectly good Mercedes as a, what do you call it… a _hot box_? Instead of the house,"

"Because if I remember correctly babe, you don't ever want to go into my 'death trap on wheels' even if your life depended on it,"

Regina huffed and folded her arms against her chest, glaring at the water seeping through my blonde hair and pooling into my lap and spilling over onto her leather seats. It was no surprise that the moment we pulled up onto the driveway, Regina was not getting out without an umbrella which she had left at work. So where did that leave me? Running out into the house to grab, my uh, pipe, and of course, completely forgetting an umbrella for Madame Mills.

"I mean, you remembered to grab your pipe and papers but oh no, heaven forbid you remember an umbrella or hell, a _towel_,"

I sat cross legged in the passenger seat as rain pounded down on the roof of the car. I didn't really listen to Regina, but then again, when had I ever?

"…the linen closet is even on the way to our bedroom and you didn't even get a towel…"

I licked the paper and squished it down into a reasonable looking joint, "shut up and smoke the damn thing, won't you?"

Regina glared at the joint like the same way Granny did when I first rocked up looking for a uniform; like I was an actual slug.

"No, I want the pipe,"

Before I could even protest, Regina snatched my filled pipe from my lap, grabbed the lighter and lit it. I didn't even know Regina could even smoke a pipe. I blinked as Regina ripped off her blue blazer, folded it and flung it onto the back seat. Her black bra was a beautiful grey shadow through her white blouse and up against her pale olive flesh. I shook my head and gazed out to the white mansion, watching the water overflow out the gutters and splatter onto the cement.

"Better get comfy my dear, we're going to be here for a while," Regina muttered as she let out a long exhale. A plume of white smoke spewed out her mouth and nostrils and damn, it was the most delightful sight in the world.

SQSQSQ

An hour had passed and somehow we both ended up on the back seat; Regina's hand up my shirt, groping my boobs and my hand down the front of her trousers, rubbing her through her panties. It wasn't even desperate, it was just the fact we could touch each other. Regina threw her head back and spilt her legs further apart as my finger brushed her clit. The air inside the car was no longer fresh and clean but thick with lust and the heavy scent of marijuana. I wanted to wind down a window ever so slightly but Regina said no and sucked my fingers into her mouth for some unknown reason.

The rain had lightened considerably but neither of us had the energy to exit the vehicle.

"Do you know what a funny word is? _Cordial_,"

Regina broke the silence with her bizarre comment. I looked over to her and she was staring at her hands as my own were making quick work of her lower region. I think Regina wasn't used to smoking that amount of weed because she was totally gone. I was nice and horny but she was just feeling the soft grey fluffy stuff on the roof of the car.

"Cordial…cordial…cord dial, core dial…" she mumbled, blinking profusely, stroking the roof repeatedly.

"Uh, Regina…you okay?" I put a hand on her shoulder and her eyes snapped up to me.

"Fuck me,"

"What?"

Regina launched herself at me; my spine smashed into the handheld bit of the door and I squeaked as she ripped her blouse of herself and latched her lips onto my neck.

"Fuck me Ms Swan, or so help me God, I'll do it myself,"

As if I needed more permission than that. I wrapped my legs around her waist and tightened them; her bare core hit my jeans and she moaned.

"Yes, yes, more…_cordial_,"

I had to suppress a giggle as Regina's hands roamed up higher underneath my shirt and cupped my boobs. Holy shit her hands were cold. I yelped as Regina grabbed the collar of my shirt and pulled it up over my head. I took out my ponytail and shook my hair as Regina disposed of the ghastly purple Staff shirt over the front seat of the car.

"You are so beautiful Ms Swan," Regina sighed as her hungry brown eyes raked up my body. I was literally sprawled out awkwardly on the backseat of her Mercedes, my jeans undone but still on and my hair covering my lace covered boobs. How I was beautiful right now was beyond me.

I went to straighten myself up as Regina leaned forward, but my hand hit the door handle. Suddenly, I was toppling backwards out onto the driveway as Regina screeched. I hit the ground with a thud as Regina tumbled out, landing beside me. The white smoke plumed out like someone had turned on four gas machines inside the Mercedes Benz.

"Holy shit," I gasped as Regina giggled. Soft rain splashed down onto my face as the back of my jeans became saturated from the wet cement. It was such an odd sensation to feel sun-baked cement mixed with icy cold rain water.

Regina propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at me. Rain water soaked her hair and I brushed away a droplet that was threatening to fall from the tip of her nose.

"You are so beautiful my love," I reached up and cupped her cheek; bringing her face down to kiss my mouth. Regina groaned and went to sit on top of me but I went to take her underneath me, and next thing we both know, we're rolling down the steep driveway, landing on a wet patch of green grass.

"Fuck," a sharp stone stuck into my back and I made a point of flipping Regina onto her back – away from the sharp rock, mind you – and staring down at the wondrous woman below me.

My hair fell down around Regina's face in thick wet strands. She battered a particularly slopping bit off of her cheek and smiled up, her lips parted ever so slightly. I was tentative at first but I leaned down and kissed her; sucking her bottom lip into my mouth and biting it. Her hips bucked hard against mine and her arm snaked around my waist pulling me closer. Her other hand reached up and squeezed my laced boob. And if this moment couldn't get any more perfect, there was a loud bleep from the road and suddenly we were splashed with a massive wall of gutter water.

"Get a room, you lesbians," A purple car whizzed off down the street.

It was a deep female voice, kind of like Granny's, which we both knew was impossible but it did sound freakishly like hers.

"Oh my god," Regina gasped as the icy cold, leaf filled water smacked and saturated us both, "holy _shit_,"

I felt my skin burst out in goose bumps and I rolled to the side, balling myself up to retain heat.

"Emma, why are we outside? Why are we lying in the rain? _Emma_!" Obviously Regina had come to her senses, "And why the hell is my car door wide open in this weather? Do you even know how expensive Mercedes Benz cost these days?"

And she was back. Regina mopped her wet hair off of her forehead and glared at me, "Ms Swan!"

I rolled my eyes and tried to get to my feet as the sky darkened once again. There was a crack of lightning and another downpour erupted.

"Close the door, close the door!" I screamed at Regina as the rain came down sideways. Regina pushed the car door closed and I grabbed her wet hand, yanking her to her feet.

"Emma, I'm cold," Regina was soaked to the bone; her blouse and trousers hanging off her like a wet blanket.

"Come on, let's get inside," I squeezed her hand and lead her up to the front door. I pulled out my keys from my pocket, shivered as wind whispered against my damp skin, and pushed the door open to the mansion.

"Wait," Regina grabbed my forearm and pulled me back out into the rain,

"What the…" But Regina threw herself at me and I scooped her up, wrapping her legs around my waist. Rain chucked down on us and I could barely stand up straight with the storm howling around us let alone the weight of Regina.

"Regina, babe, I know this is romantic and all, kissing in the rain, but we're going to get hypothermia or some shit," I peeled the woman off of me and dragged her soaking ass inside the house.

"Come on, let's get in the shower, cook some food and be sober enough to meet Claudia's father, okay?"

Regina nodded, "we're having shower sex dear, and there's nothing you can do about it; this weed has made me horny as a nine grade boy,"

"Jesus Regina," I slammed the door shut and dragged her up the staircase to our ensuite, "I love you, you know that?"

But Regina just smiled and kissed me quickly on the lips, which were now a nice shade of blue, "I love you too my dear,"

SQSQSQ

a/n: I REALLY LIKE THIS CHAPTER FOR SOME REASON IDK okay bye


End file.

Once Upon a Time, Humor, Romance