Harry Potter 1. 

"Good morning class," Professor Flitwick said the following Monday in charms. "Today we will be working on tickling charms. You move your wand like this;" he moved his wand just so. "Then you say,

rictusempra. Everyone pair up, and practice the spell on each other. If it works, you'll be in fits of laughter, if not...We won't go into that now. Pair up now, pair up."

"So how was it?" Harry asked Ron on the other side of the room.

"How was what?" Ron replied.

"You and Hermione." Harry grinned devilishly.

"There was no sex, no kissing, or anything. She just fell asleep on top of me, no big deal."

"It sounds like a big deal to-"

"Rictusempra!" Ron wailed and pointed his want toward Harry's chest. Afterwards, Harry burst in uncontrollable laughter.

"You, ha ha, fucking, ha ha, tosser, ha ha, I, ha ha, wasn't, ha ha, even, ha ha, ready, ha ha. Rictu-ha-sem-ha-pra!" Harry laughed.

"Ha, you, ha ha ha, smarmy, hah, bastard, ha ha ha ha!" Ron guffawed.

Meanwhile on the other side of the room...

"How was it?" Susan Bones asked her partner, Hermione.

"How was what?" Hermione replied.

"You and that stud of a man, Ronald Billius Weasley." Susan said nonchalantly.

"We didn't even do anything! All I did was sleep in his dorm because I had horrid nightmares! For Heaven's sake Susan, I didn't kiss him!" Hermione grunted.

"Did u snuggle him? What was he wearing? More importantly, what were you wearing?" Susan asked.

"Yes I sort of snuggled him, he was quite comfy. He was wearing scarlet boxers." Hermione retorted.

"Well, what were you wearing?"

"I was wearing my baby blue silk tank top with matching knickers."

"Dressing for the occasion...You're a smart girl, Hermione, but dirty, I need to learn from you." Susan said in her nonchalant voice.

"I'm dirty? I'm dirty? What about you! More like the whore of England to me!" Hermione said, gritting her teeth. Susan just laughed. She wasn't even under the tickling charm.

"Whore of England. Utterly hilarious."

"SUSAN! Rictusempra!" Hermione bellowed, and pointed her wand at Susan.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha! You over react Hermione! Ha ha ha ha ha! Everyone knows your one of the most pristine girls in our grade! There are third years hornier than you! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Rict-ha ha ha ha- usemp-ha ha ha ha-ra!" Susan tittered as she pointed her wand at Hermione.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Horny third years, you must ha ha ha ha ha ha be kidding me! They're just beginning to know about hormones at that age! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!" Hermione said, talking with great difficulty because of the tickling charm.

Then the Charms room door swung open. It was Professor McGonagall. Even though all the students were in uncontrollable laughing fits, all the students watched her every move attentively.

"Excuse me Professor Flitwick, I would like to have a few words with Mister Weasley and Miss Granger."

"Oh of course Minerva. Ron, Hermione, Professor McGonagall wants a word with you!" Professor Flitwick said loudly.

Still laughing, Ron and Hermione left the classroom with Professor McGonagall. She led them to her classroom, which was full of small second years taking a written assignment.

"Come with me," Professor McGonagall whispered, and led them into her office, and shut the door.

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, good morning, ha ha ha ha ha ha Professor McGonagall!" Hermione tittered.

"Good ha ha morning ha ha, Professor, ha ha ha." Ron chuckled uncontrollably.

"Oh goodness," Professor McGonagall muttered. She said a spell, and the two laughing teenagers stopped immediately.

"I have addressed the problem to Dumbledore. He absolutely refuses you to constantly take sleeping draughts. He says if you keep taking them, you'll take potions for every bad dream you have. Same goes with you two sleeping with each other. All we can do for you is give you some moral support."

"That won't really do anything Professor!" Ron said, getting up in frustration.

"Ron's right Professor." Hermione said quietly, looking at her shoes.

"I'm sorry, but, we can't let students do things like this. Besides, you're not even of age! You're only 16. Are you two even in love," Professor McGonagall said coolly.

Ron and Hermione stared at her, speechless. "Now, let's get to that punishment. let's say 30 points from Gryffindor? Does that sound good," Still, Ron and Hermione were speechless. "I suppose it does. Now if I hear that you've been sleeping in the same room again, your punishment will be more severe. Understand me? No head off to lunch." Professor McGonagall muttered.

"You slept with my brother? Hermione," Ginny said in pure shock. "That's, that's, DISGUSTING! You could do way better than that, like Dean for instance. Hell, Neville would be a way better choice than arse-faced brother!" That night at the girls' dormitories.

"Neville? You've got to be kidding me! Anyway, being around Ron was quite nice." Hermione said.

"You fancy Ron, don't you!" Ginny giggled.

"Of course not! He's my best friend, Ginny!"

"Friend's can fancy each other, did you know that?"

"Well, they can, but me and Ron are different!"

"How so, Mione?"

Hermione didn't know what to say. "Well...Well... it's just different!"

"Aha! You rate my brother!"

"Of course not! Why do keep thinking that?" Hermione asked, blushing slightly.

"Well, when you couldn't sleep, you could've went to my room. We're like, best friends, girl friends anyway. If you didn't like him, you would've never went to his room in the first place! To top that, you're blushing right now!" Ginny laughed.

"I'm going to go to the Great Hall to get something to eat. Do you want anything?" Hermione asked.

"Now, you're avoiding the subject...Hmm... Some chocolate cake, some chocolate frogs, acid pops, mmm, some treacle fudge, and ooo, some chicken from dinner. Thanks a bunch Hermione." Ginny replied.

"Either you must be hungry, or you are seriously menstrual....Ok, I'll be back in a bit."

"I can't fucking stand Professor McGonagall! ARGH! What am I, more importantly Mione, going to sleep at night with these shit dreams all about?" Ron ranted as he paced the boys' dormitory.

"Mione? Well, do what I do. Do nothing, but if it's due to an evil bastard, such as ol' Lord Volders, do a little kick ass Occlumency, and it'll be alright," Harry replied. "Mione? What's that all about?"

"Shut up." Ron grunted, still pacing the room.

"Is that a pet name? Oooo what's yours? Ronnie poo? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

"ARGH, you annoying wanker!" Ron laughed as he threw his pillow at Harry.

Just as soon as Ron's pillow hit Harry square in the eye, Neville burst through the door, smiling idiotically.

"Hi, everybody!" Neville laughed, as if he had over a dozen fire whiskeys.

Harry grabbed Neville by the collar and yowled, "What's wrong with you man? Snap out of it, damnit!"

"Stop it, Harry! I'm fine!" Neville replied, stupidly.

"Hmm. I see, I see. Acting stupid, tie undone, two shirt buttons undone, swollen lips...AHA! You were out snogging somebody! I never knew you had it in you," Harry said, wiping a fake tear.

"You're now with the big boys, Nevy-kins," Ron said, patting Neville's back. "Who was the lucky girl? Tell us all about it?"

"Well, you would never believe this, but I don't give a damn about what you say. Well, this afternoon in the library, doing some potions homework when-"

"Ron, how could you say that. Sorry Neville, for interrupting. You can't be with these supposed big boys when you never kissed a girl! Like the kind in crap romance muggle movies!" Harry laughed hysterically.

"I slept with Mione, so shut the hell up, wanker! You never had a girlfriend! Continue Neville." Ron grunted angrily.

"Somebody came in-"

"Bloody bullocks, Ron! Stop with your yelling, Neville wants to talk about his experience with a girl! Ok, go ahead Neville." Harry laughed.

"It was-"

Seamus ran into the dormitory. "Damnit, Ron! You better get to the common room! Hermione is crying, and her face is badly brusied!"

"We better go take a look at this!" Harry said, as Ron and him left the dorm.

"Damn it to Hell, tossers! Everytime I say something, something comes up," Neville grunted. "Hermione?" Neville ran down to the common room to see what happened to Hermione.

"Hermione, are you alright?" Ron asked, as he pushed other students away as he sat down next to her. She just nodded.

"Tell us what happened." Harry asked to Hermione quietly.

"I...I'll...do it...when...nobody's around." Hermione sobbed.

"Clear off! Clear off! As a prefect, I order you people to get your little arses to your dorms," Ron yowled. Nobody left. "We might as well talk this with her someplace else. Hermione, do you want to go to library with me and Harry?" Ron asked.

"No. I...I just think....I'll...Go to sleep now...I have to give... Menstrual Ginny her snacks. Good night, Ron, good night, Harry." Hermione whimpered as she walked up the girls' staircase.

"Do you want to sleep in my dorm, Hermione?" Ginny asked.

"Oh. Ok. Just let me get my things." Hermione replied. After she got her things, Hermione slept in Ginny's room soundly. As Hermione was sleeping, she was tossing and turning, and whimpering.

..._"Ron! Harry! Oh Merlin," Hermione screamed as Harry and Ron hit the ground. She tried to reach them, but someone from behind her pulled her back. "Let me go, God damnit!" Hermione kicked and screamed, but the person holding her back wouldn't let go._

"Hello, my pretty," A cold heartless voice said in the shadows. "Two down, and one more to go." The shadow raised his wand...

"Hermione, are you alright?" Ginny asked from her four poster.

"Yes. I'm fine. I think I'll sit in the common room." Hermione replied.

"I'll come with you." Ginny said.

"No. I think I'll have a chat with Ron and Harry for a few minutes."

"You know what McGonagall said! You'll get more than points deducted if you sleep in his room again!"

"I'll ask him to sit with me in the common room. So don't worry Gin, nothing will happen."

"I'm coming with you!"

"No God damnit! Sorry Ginny, I'd like to sit with Ron alone, if you don't mind. Truly sorry, Ginny." Hermione whispered, grabbing her robe.

"Oh, ok. I'll talk to you at breakfast. I'm going to be up early tomorrow just incase..." Ginny laughed, but with a disappointed look on her face.

"Ron?" Hermione asked when she kneeled in front of Ron's four poster.

Ron woke up startled. "Mum! Phew, it's only you Hermione. Do you want to sit with me?"

"Oh, I was thinking we sit in the common room, if it's alright with you."

"Oh, yeah, sure. Just let me get my robe." Ron got up from his bed, and to Hermione's surprise, he was wearing navy blue boxers with broomsticks and snitches on them.

"Thank you for sitting with me, Ron." Hermione said quietly, as they sat in front of the roaring fire in the common room.

"Welcome.Damn, it's hot in here," Ron laughed, as he took off his robe.

"Yeah, I guess it kind of is," Hermione sighed, looking at Ron's muscles, he got them after practicing quidditch all summer. Hermione sat down with a Ron in the hot common room (the fire, of course) for a few minutes, just staring out of the window, when reluctantly, she took off her robe. She was wearing a black tank top and black lace knickers.

"Do you always sleep in your knickers?" Ron asked, ears slightly reddening.

"Well, yes, I guess I do."

"Well, I was just wondering, you don't have to say anything if you feel uncomfortable, but, who did this to your face? I'm taking you do Madam Pomfrey's tomorrow morning whether you like it your not."

"I...I..." Hermione just sobbed. She just fell on top of Ron (he, was laying down), sobbing.

"It's alright, you don't have to." Ron whispered, as she hugged her. _Oh Merlin, Hermione. Poor dear. _Then for no reason at all, Hermione kissed Ron on the lips. It wasn't a full passionate one, but it was sweet and short.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know what came over me. It's just, that, you're so nice, and everything, letting me sit, and er, sleep with you the other day."

"It's all right."

"I should be going now, It's already 3:40." Hermione whispered.

"No, don't go, just stay for a few more minutes." Ron pleaded.

"Fine, just for 20 more minutes. You big scaredy baby." Hermione sighed.

"Who are you calling big scaredy baby, you went to my room!" Ron laughed.

"Well, you don't want me to leave! There, we're even." Hermione giggled.

After that, they just lay down next to each other, looking through the window, then, fell into a nice dreamless sleep.

CHAPTER 3 coming soon!!!


	2. What to do for a bad dream

Author's note: Bangers and mash. British slang for sausage and potatoes. Sorry if this is incredibly long, but hey, I'm on a roll!

..._"Harry! Ron!" Hermione screamed as someone pulled her back. He-who-must-not-be-named raised his wand high pointed it at her two best friends and said the two words that she couldn't bare..._

"Hermione! Are you alright?" Parvati asked, looking down at her from her four poster.

Hermione woke up startled. She was sweating, but yet, she was so cold. "Wha' happened?"

"Good lord! You were moving violently and muttering 'no, don't' all the time. Are you sure you're alright?" Lavender said.

Hermione wiped the sweat from her forehead and got up to get her robe. "Where are you going?" Parvati asked.

"I'm just going to the common room to get some fresh air. It's incredibly stuffy in here." Hermione replied.

"Do you want any company?" Lavender asked, looking deeply concerned.

"I want to be alone if you don't mind; I want to clear my head." Hermione ascended down the girls' dormitory staircase and flopped down onto a big scarlet chair in front of the roaring fire. She was feeling restless. Pacing up and down, Hermione thought of the events that happened just three months ago. Her mind played everything. Like some sick and scary motion picture. Starting from when that bitch, Umbridge began interrogating her and Harry. By the time she got to the brains, she was curled up into a ball, crying and shaking in fear.

_I don't want to go back to the dormitories. _Hermione thought. _They'll pester me about what I dreamt about, and it would be utter Hell. _She giggled shakily because she used a swear word, something that she usually doesn't do. _I don't want to be in here alone. _When she thought that, she let out a tiny sob. _It's three a.m. and there's no school tomorrow, maybe, I could sit with Ron for a few minutes, pray to Merlin he won't mind._

Hermione got up, and advanced toward the boys' dormitory staircase and opened the door. She sweetly looked at everyone sleeping. She saw Neville drooling, Seamus's foot popping out of his blanket, Dean curled up in a ball, snoring. Harry and Ron looked like they weren't having a good night. Harry was shaking, and Ron viciously turning his head side-to-side in his four poster, with his blanket on the floor. To her surprise, Ron was only in a pair of scarlet boxers. She crept up to Ron's bed, and kneeled in front of him.

"Ron?" Hermione whispered into Ron's ear.

"Wha'? Mum, I don't want any bangers and mash." Ron muttered sleepily.

"Ron," Hermione whispered again into his ear. "Can you wake up, please?"

"Mum? I told you a thousand times, Hermione hates pink!" Ron muttered.

Hermione giggled, and shook him. Which, was a sort of difficult task, because he was almost a foot taller.

Ron blinked his eyes, and look towards Hermione. "Herm- YAWN ione? What are you doing in here, it's three in the morning, and classes will start tomorrow."

"Tomorrow is Saturday, Ron."

"Oh. Why are you in here, you rarely come in here, you should be in bed."

"I'm scared, Ron. I had this nightmare and I couldn't sleep. I didn't want Parvati and Lavender pestering me, so, I wanted to sit with you for a few minutes so they'll go to sleep. If you don't want me in here, I'll just sit with Ginny or something." Hermione sighed.

"No. No, it's alright, here, you take the blanket, I'll sit at the foot of the bed." Ron replied.

"Ok," Hermione whispered. Ron got up, tucked Hermione in, and sat at the foot of the bed, just as he said.

"It's just so scary, what happened to me you, Harry, and everyone. I'm just so scared that I'll lose Harry-" She began to sob. "and you." Hermione's salty tears fell down her cheeks, and made her face shine in the moon light. She was on her knees, and literally fell against Ron's bare skin and sobbed. Ron held her tight, and caressed her hair.

"It'll be alright Mione," Ron whispered, wiping Hermione's tears with his blanket. They just sat there for a few minutes, until Hermione suddenly said, "Its 3:30, I'll go now."

"No. Don't, I don't want you to leave. I hate admit this, but, I've been having some nightmares myself, so could you stay just a bit longer," Ron whispered, as he saw Dean stir, but quickly fell asleep again. Hermione just nodded, and sat back in Ron's four poster. "Let me take your robe, you'll feel more comfortable." Hermione didn't say a word, and her robe fell right off of her. To Ron's surprise, she was wearing a small tank top and a small pair of silk baby blue knickers. Ron's eyes wandered to her knickers, and Hermione blushed.

Hermione crawled in bed, and Ron just sat at the foot, looking at her, and yawned. "You must be tired, I'll let you have the bed." Hermione whispered.

"It's alright, you can have as much bed as you want." Ron replied.

"No, no, no, I insist." Hermione whispered, lifting up the blanket so he could crawl in.

Ron crawled into the covers, and gave Hermione a hug. As she was getting up, Ron grabbed her by the waist and pulled her in.

"Please, don't leave. I...I don't...I don't want you to get nightmares." Ron whispered, looking at the clock, which read 4:13.

Hermione went into the covers with Ron. She wrapped her arms around his waist, and dug her head into his chest.

"Good night, Mione." Ron whispered.

"Good night, love...Ron, Ron I mean. Good night Ron. Good night Ron." Hermione replied, looking incredibly embarassed. Hermione crawled on top of Ron's chest, and had a dreamless sleep.

"Oh Merlin, what is that?" Dean asked, pointing to the lump in Ron's blanket.

"I don't know, I just don't know. I dare you to see what it is." Seamus laughed.

"Bloody Whizbee's! It's Herm-"

Ron, Hermione, and Harry woke up startled. "You're a lucky man, Ron." Dean sniggered.

"How did you pull a stunt like that? Parvati never did that with me!" Seamus chuckled.

"Just GET OUT!" Ron roared, grabbing his wand.

"Fine, fine." Dean retorted, and left with Seamus. Neville woke up, looking sort of startled, said good morning to Harry, Ron, and Hermione, and left with no questions.

"I better be going into my dormitory. Good bye, Ron. Bye Harry. I'll talk to you guys at breakfast." Hermione muttered, and dashed out of the boys' dormitory.

"What's this all about?" Harry said grinning.

"Shut up, you smarmy bastard." Ron grunted angrily as he put on some muggle weekend clothes.

"I want to know, Ron. Are you guys going out?"

"Fine, fine. Ok, Hermione was scared, and she came in here because she wanted my company, and then we just fell asleep. No sex, no kissing, nothing."

"Right. I'll confirm this with Hermione later. See you at breakfast." Harry laughed as he walked down to the common room.

By the time Ron got to the Great Hall for breakfast, students were abuzz with conversation. Gryffindors whistled and clapped at Ron as he sat down.

"Just don't say anything Ron." Hermione whispered.

"Well it isn't Weasel and Mud blood. How can you stoop so low and sleep with this, this, this MUD BLOOD WHORE?" Malfoy said behind Ron.

Ron's eyes seared with anger, and got up.

"Please, Ron, don't." Hermione sighed.

"Muddy is right, you shouldn't fight with me. My father-"

"Oh shut up and go snog Crabbe or something, I don't want to deal with your shit right now." Ron replied and sat down.

"You will pay Weasel. You will pay." Malfoy sniggered, and returned to the Slytherin table.

"What was that all about?" Ginny asked, approaching Ron, Harry and Hermione.

"Malfoy's just being a fucking tosser, like usual." Ron grunted, jamming his fork into his porrige.

"I hear from some hufflepuff girls that you and Hermione were sleeping with each other last night." Ginny looked at Ron and Hermione, then Harry, grinning, then she laughed.

"I'll explain later. McGonagall is coming." Hermione told Ginny from the corner of her mouth.

"Miss Granger, Mister Weasley, come with me into my office now." Professor McGonagall muttered, leading them into her office.

"I heard by many of the students, that you two were sleeping in the same dormitory. In the same bed too. You two better explain, and it better be good. Or I will have to dock 50 points from both of you.

"Hem," Hermione coughed. "I've been having some nightmares lately about recent events, I was having a horrible night. Lavender and Parvati were trying to comfort me, but they didn't do much. So I sat in the common room, I didn't want to go into the dormitories because Lavender and Parvati were pestering me, so I went up to the boys' dorms. There, Ron comforted me when I was crying, and we just fell asleep. When I was with Ron, I didn't feel uncomfortable, I had a very nice dreamless sleep when I was in there. I'm telling the truth Professor. "

"I see. Mister Weasley, explain." McGonagall said.

"I was sleeping. Hermione came in, crying, so I calmed her, and we just sort of fell asleep. I've been having a couple of nightmares myself, and I was very happy having her around. Yep." Ron said.

"I see. Why didn't you come tell Madam Pomfrey or me? OR any of the other professors?" Professor McGonagall muttered.

"I thought I could try to get rid of them myself, but unfortunatly I was unsuccessful." Hermione answered.

"Yeah. Same with me." Ron was looking down at his shoes.

"I see. I don't want you two to be dependent on sleeping potions, and I don't want you sleeping with each other," Professor McGonagall, sighed.

"Well, we feel better when we're around each other." Ron said.

"I don't know if I can allow it. Ask Madame Pomfrey for some sleeping potions, and I'll talk this over with Dumbledore. I simply can't let students sleep with each other. That's just plain mad. But, you two, under the circumstances of what happened a few months ago..." Her voice trailed off.

"May we be excused?" Hermione asked McGonagall.

"Yes. Yes you may. I'll tell you your punishment, and what to to about your dreams tomorrow."


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor, Romance