Mass Effect Tali's Terribly Kinky

**Tali's Terribly Kinky.**

**I've planned this story for months. but had to wait to establish this series better. Its rated M for a pretty good reason. Originally this was going to be Porn with Plot but that has changed. This story will have a direct sequel released next. There is a significant amount of Talimance, so you can consider this an apology for Soulmates which had very little of the pairing.**

**Anyways, I hope you enjoy this half as much as I did writing it.**

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She could not believe she was going through with it. This was so embarrassing.

Barely a week into their unofficial relationship with John Shepard, Tali'Zorah vas Normandy had found herself with an itch to scratch. An itch that she tried everything to relieve. From distracting herself with her work to spending a quiet evening locked away in Kasumi's empty room; A canister of wine, mood music and thoughts of only John as she furiously turned up the control for her nerve stimulator.

But it was never enough. It was not what she needed. It was years of desire bottled up and boiling; now it was affecting her everyday life. She could not think like she use to. Things got confusing, even Kenneth Donnelly managed to get three steps ahead of her during basic engine maintenance. Stupid her had nothing other than wondering what John would feel like inside her on her brain.

So after embarrassment after embarrassment she decided it was time to relieve this urge now so she could get back to being her usually dedicated self.

At first Tali decided to approach Kasumi. Perhaps she would help set up some sort of date. Help her figure out what it was she needed from Shepard. As Tali stood in the elevator, she decided against that. She did not need help from the gossipy human who was much more interested in the emotional aspects of her and John. Both of them had sorted out their feelings. Both did not make it official, but that did not matter.

No, what she really needed was medical advice. Medical advice that did not involve Karin Chakwas, John's unofficial aunt (By quarian standards at least) asking a whole lot of awkward questions and telling her that abstinence was the only way to keep healthy. A fact she already knew.

So, instead she went some to someone a little more open to taking a risk.

The door to the science labs opened in front of her. She stepped in and found Doctor Mordin Solus, certified genius biologist tapping furiously away at his terminal, surround by a variety of bacteria cultures. He seemed rather busy. So instead, like the occasional 'chicken' she could become over asking for help from others, Tali slowly backed out of the room. She could come back later.

Tali was not quick enough however. Mordin's head swung up, his eyes focused on her.

"Miss Zorah! Is there anyway I can assist you in?" He inquired, quickly setting away his cultures back into the storage fridge.

Behind her mask, Tali bit her lip.

"I was going to go and speak to Kasumi Goto about this, but I think I need to speak to you instead." Tali spoke, at long last finding her voice. "Do you have... You know... Doctor/Patient confidentiality?"

Mordin's curious expression reformed into a smile.

"One of the pillars of being a good doctor regardless of species. How may I help?" He assured the nervous quarian.

"It's just... I want to get out of this suit a few hours." Tali explained, fighting off her stutter the best she could.

"Oh course its possible." Mordin mused "Could convert the AI room into a clean room, like Doctor Chakwas did for Lieutenant Forzan. Quite ingenious of her, really. AI room has to be the cleanest room on the Normandy. Safest. That is if you do not mind bunking with EDI."

Tali wringed her hands.

"Yes.. but I mean... with... well.. with someone else."

The thoughtfulness on Mordin's expression vanished as he immediately deduced what was happening and why he was being consulted.

"Ah, heard rumors involving you and the Commander." Mordin announced, sounding almost thrilled for the coupling. "Tend to disregard them as ship boredom, heard one about Joker and EDI once -implications unpleasant. Good to see at least one floating around is true. Difficult times, people tend to bottle up and hide emotional attachments in fear of potential romantic partner's death. Hard to handle for most species. Are you and Shepard planning to consummate this?"

Tali felt the heat overwhelm her senses as Mordin's huge eyes stared at her expectantly, there was no trace jesting, only an intense scientific interest.

"What? No. Not yet I mean.. No." Tali stammered out "I just... want him to see my face... perhaps... perhaps even more. I'm not sure."

Doctor Solus hummed.

"I see. suggest against this encounter, even with environmental sterilization, antibiotics and immune suppliants, you will undoubtedly be ill for a prolonged period." Mordin pressed, his hands curling together. "Suggest we start treatments first. Plus this is a new attachment, attachments require substance. Trust must be earned for this. Go on dates, flirt, smile, hug. All that should be done first for now."

_Trust?_ Was Mordin being serious? She trusted in the man since he saved her life. Shepard definitely had her trust. As for everything else. All of that either happened or would happen in a matter of time. She wasn't looking for a distraction. She was looking to resolve this. Now. Right about now going to Chakwas and enduring her lectures was looking better and better.

"Yeah, that might work for salarians, but not me. Thank you for the suggestion, but that's just _not_ going to happen." Tali almost snapped, losing her patience. "I'm about to explode, so either help me work this out or watch me have a meltdown right in the middle of dinner tonight."

Mordin, fortunately for Tali, wasn't fazed by her attitude. He turned away and wandered back to his terminal. He quietly tapped away. Tali stepped forward and noticed that the salarian had a file on the subject of quarian physiology, including works about the immune deficiency.

"Not my first quarian patient who'd want this." Mordin murmured. "Spent several months building an immune system for one of your people. Worked, but many complications. Cost inefficient for quarian race. After exile, should have diverted funds to science, colonization projects, general healthcare. Not on guns to fight a enemy that never attacked first.."

Tali bit back the urge to get upset. The doctor was always very blunt about his opinions. The last thing she wanted to do was make the doctor upset enough to forget her request of aid.

"We needed those guns and ships for the sake of our species survival." She explained, her voice unable to erase the tone of annoyance at the salarian's observation.

Mordin shook his head.

"Short sighted thought process: Should have learned after the second and third failed offensive against the geth." Mordin dismissed, again unfazed by the annoyance. "Could have diverted wasted funds into medicine, found artifical supplements to your immune system while you searched for a new world. Mediocrity, stubborn militarist put quarians in precarious situation. Lack of Council assistance also major player in the quarian situation, should have done better."

Tali shook her head. She did not want to hear his assessment anymore. It bothered her, just how eerily it made sense. This was not the clash of emotional emotional opinions like she once once and awhile with John. This was a cold logic sprouted by a former intelligence officer.

"Every world we wanted to colonize was either claimed or the turians would threaten to bomb us out of existence." She finally returned, using the old line. "What could we do other than fight the geth for control of Rannoch?"

"Assumption based on hundreds of years of anti-council propaganda perpetrated by bitter Admirals." Mordin countered as he stood up from his console, wagging one of his long fingers at her. "The Council canceled your Citadel membership. They had no say over your colonial efforts, so long as you stayed off claimed worlds. "

The lab went silent as Mordin went to work gathering a variety of medications from out of the lab fridge.

"Tell that to the humans." Tali finally spoke up. "They did not know the council even existed, yet the turians applied their laws to a new species."

She did not notice the slight smile on Mordin's lips.

"Turian war against humanity regrettable but justified. New relays must be monitored, extremely dangerous practice." He explained away as he turned back. "Humans had opened over fifty before the turians found out. Fifty in a time span of eight galactic years. To put into context, In the first eight years of salarian mass relay travel, we opened seven, turians opened four, quarians opened eight. Human ambition is frightening, especially after the turian defeat on Shanxi. No other species ever got caught up in and won a first contact war against a council race. Would have lost in a prolonged war, but now unlikely either sides would break down in a prolonged conflict. Took turians thousands of years to get to where they are. Took humans decades. Turian/human war... unimaginable."

Before Tali could respond, Mordin held his hand up.

"Can debate about the details of galactic politics and the exile, or could get back to medical discussion. Your choice." He simply spoke to her. It was an ultimatum, whether he meant it or not.

Tali, deciding that working on an immune booster was far more important than a three century old debate nodded and watched as the salarian worked on his station quietly. Her thoughts fell back to Shepard, who left her on the ship while he went down to Pragia with the biotic psycho, Jack and her nemesis, Miranda Lawson of all people.

For once, she was quite glad that he choose against bringing her along.

"Can create a cocktail of various immune system supplements and antibiotics for a few hours of physical contact with him." He finally spoke, looking up from the terminal. "Must promise that you will limit intimacy with him, kisses, touches acceptable. No intercourse for the time being, sweat, bodily fluids may cause prolonged irritation, so cover up as much as you can. After recovery, suggest putting you on a strict immune system building regiment."

Mordin took a breath and added.

"Will reduce after effect of copulation Should you decide to continue seeing him, of course."

Tali flattened out her hood, her head hung low as she sighed.

"I would not worry about that..."

So she could fool around but that was about it. She had to keep a minimal layer of protection on. Shepard in all likelihood would have to as well. It was such a shame. The way he was built and the flash of skin she got to see no less than a week ago. All those muscles and that perfect abdomen. What he could do to her... Oh keelah. She had heard from Jack that the best thing a woman could do after sex was have a cigarette... A habit she disapproved of... but if it was Shepard she had under her, than she might make an exception...

"Come back in an hour for injections." Mordin spoke up, interrupting her thoughts and forcing her back to reality. "Must suggest he take precautions as well. Take this. Have him shower once back from Pragia."

Tali exhaled unsteadily, driving the thoughts of Shepard out of her blasted, sex addled mind. She stared at the small plastic bottle in his hand and shook her head.

"No... this is sort of a surprise,you see." Tali explained, trying not to sound too lost in her thoughts. "You would not mind a bit of deception would you?"

Mordin smiled knowingly.

"Former member of Special Task Group, as you may recall; Deception is my specialty." Mordin reminded her, "Shepard however is difficult to deceive. Suggestions?"

Tali thought about it for a moment chuckled lightly.

"It's difficult if you don't know the right angle to play." Tali stating, smiling privately. "The best method is to blame the turian. Trust me, it works every time."

Giving the scientist a word of thanks, Tali gathered the armload of supplies Mordin had retrieved for her and left with a slight bounce in her step, Leaving Mordin musing over his role in making all of this possible.

**...**

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"I'm going to go and rest. Clean all that shit off my mind, you know? Spent years forgetting that hellhole. Later Scarface, Cheerleader."

Subject Zero, now known simply as Jack paused. Slowly, she turned back to face the man who let her return to Pragia without so much as a hesitation. She shuffled slightly, almost nervously. A strange sight from a woman who had singlehandedly forced a space station to crash into a Hanar moon.

"Hey, Shepard... Thanks." She spoke up, looking at him at long last.

Shepard nodded.

"Any time Jack. If you need to talk."

Jack nodded blankly and pushed past Miranda, who had been absolutely the worst choice to take on the mission. They fought every time the two of them opened their mouths. It had gotten so bad that he assigned Garrus as their babysitter and turian shield should either of them start thinking about throwing biotic field at the other.

The assignment he gave to Garrus wasn't going to be cheap. He was going to have to foot Garrus' tab at the Citadel when they docked in a weeks time. Garrus, unfortunately had a real tolerance for a strong drink.

Miranda shook her head. she looked very unnerved by what went on at Pragia. Unnerved because even to her, her excuses for her employer were growing thinner. Shepard turned away from the two of them. He rose an eyebrow. Approaching him with a plastic bottle in hand was Doctor Mordin Solus.

"Doctor?" He called out, the title caught Garrus and Miranda's attention. They two looked up to see the strangely smiling salarian.

"Ah, Shepard. I trust the mission was successful?"

Shepard nodded, his eyes looking at the bottle unexcited. Whenever Mordin brought him something, there was usually something wrong.

"Yes, sorry for prying, but must suggest you take a shower." Mordin requested, offering the bottle to the Spectre. "Use this, Primary ingredient is rubbing alcohol. Try not to consume or get into eyes."

Shepard tilted his head, his mouth frowning.

"Why are you giving me this? I have my own bodywash."

Mordin chuckled slightly and shook his head.

"Won't do, must understand, no offense intended but non-human crewmembers have... _complained_ of excess musk escaping your pores, especially after missions. whether you sterilize or not." Mordin explained, as delicate as a jackhammer could be. "Not your fault, really. Some find it... hard to handle in a professional nature, sensitive noses. Krogan for instance, turians also find the scent aggravating. Apologies, Must get back to the labs; Cultures are ready for observation."

With a polite nod and a smile, Mordin departed, leaving Shepard, Miranda and the suddenly coy looking turian. Shepard raised an arm and took a sniff. Smelling nothing out of the ordinary, he turned to Garrus Vakarian.

"Do I stink?"

Garrus shrugged, looking close to having a fit.

"You... You get use to it." He admitted very carefully. "You smell like meat and blood. All that sloshing around just inside your skin? It's kinda gross if you think about it. Asari's and quarians are the same apparently. but at least quarians have a suit to cover that smell... and as for the asari... well you know. I imagine Liara was an eyeopener. You just sort of ignore it. "

Shepard ignored the comment, Miranda however became much more interested in the banter.

"Says the guy who smells like he's been having sex with an iron girder." He muttered, earning a suddenly wide eyed look and a laugh from his turian friend. Garrus reached out and shoved the human hard.

"Very funny, meatbag." Garrus cackled, only to get shoved back just as hard as he pushed Shepard.

"Meatbag?" The Commander repeated, grinning, his teeth baring. "How's that swimming working out for you?"

Garrus blinked at the insult throw at him so quickly.

"That was low, even for you."

Shepard started to laugh much more.

"I know it's your secret fantasy, swimming." He pressed on, still grinning defiantly at his friend. "I bet if you ask real nice, Joker'll let you borrow his life jacket."

Miranda, much to both of their surprise, cut in.

"Garrus might need to borrow some arm floaties as well." She added as she casually examined her nails." "I don't imagine his arms will be any better in the water than the rest of that body is."

Shepard howled as he absolutely lost control of himself. Shaking his head as he was forced to listen to the annoying human laughter, Garrus left, leaving Miranda and Shepard by themselves. Grinning slightly, he leaned into Miranda, who stared at him, appearing amused by her teasing of the turian.

"I haven't been chastised over my bathing skills since I was five." He muttered to her. "Do I smell?"

Expecting a dirty look from from the prim and proper woman, Shepard was surprised when Miranda leaned in and whiffed the air around him. She squinted her nose and pulled back, her head shaking.

"Not anymore than usual, Shepard." She informed Shepard. She shrugged, adding. "I suppose the non-humans could be more sensitive to it. I suppose you could always ask Tali for an opinion, though I imagine it would be a fairly bias one... considering her _stake_ in you."

Shepard rubbed the back of his neck. Miranda raised the side of her lip into a knowing half smirk. Shepard now silently checked Miranda into the list of individuals now aware of the thing between his quarian engineer and himself.

"Regardless of what you like to do in your sparetime, We need to write a report about what happened on Gel Hinnom for the Illusive Man." Miranda continued as she hadn't said her last words while she unhooked her pistol belt from off her hip. "Being chased by the Collectors is bad for the mission. We can only safely traverse council space. The moment we head out deeper, they're watching us. Perhaps we could have him shell out for a M.E.R.S."

Shepard held up his hand to stop the femme fatale with a nerd streak from continuing.

"A _what?_"

"The M.E.R.S: mass effect relay scrambler;" She clarified for her confused looking Commander. "One of the other Cerberus cells designed it. Everytime we relay jump we leave a trail that anyone with the right amount of dedication could find. The scrambler spreads the eezo trail."

Shepard whistled lowly, that would be a very useful piece of equipment to have. Why he didn't install it in the first place seemed kinda odd.

"Neat, Was this to trick the Alliance or the Collectors?" He asked as he collected his gear and follow Miranda to the elevator.

Miranda's trademark smirk vanished a the question. She seemed nervous to reply to the question. She cleared her throat, her lips pursed together.

"It was designed to cover our tracks when... well from quarian retaliation for the Idenna incident." She admitted as causally as she could.

_Quarian retaliation?_

He had heard about the Idenna attack. The moment it was mentioned around Tali, she grew very agitated and completely forgot that her ranting about it was being overheard by Cerberus personnel and the many listening devices planted on the ship. The did not matter to the quarian. The raid was horrid, unforgivable. Cerberus had humiliated what was left of a once proud race, all to capture a biotic girl.

The operative ducked her head as Shepard's eyes narrowed at the reply. Before Shepard realized it, Miranda's head snapped back, laughter erupting from her usually pursed lips.

"Jesus, Shepard. Even the Illusive Man was surprised at just how frightening a naval force that size could be when they started hunted for any ship that even looked like it was Cerberus funded." She admitted, she smiling at the memories. All Shepard could do was stare.

"Your friends were the first group that ever infiltrated the Migrant Fleet in three hundred years." Shepard lowly whispered; "You shook their confidence, killed their people and you think it was funny?"

As the two of them stepped into the elevator, Miranda Lawson hit the Deck three button, turned to Shepard and dared to nod.

"Of course." Miranda smugly returned, crossing her arms as she raised her eyebrow . "One must take some pride in their accomplishments. They thought themselves so untouchable with their fifty thousand ship fleet. Besides. He informed them very politely that they had accidentally stumbled across his property."

Shepard hit the button to his quarters.

"His _property_ being some frightened biotic girl." He asked, trying to bite back the annoyance in his voice. "Does he own Jack as well?"

Once again, Lawson nodded, her eyes ever blinking.

"Yes. The moment Jack and the Greyson girl were targeted as biotic candidates; They became his property." She explained, raising her hand to silence the Spectre. " Oh _please_, spare me Shepard. There is no room for debate on the subject, they simply _are_. Whether they like it or not. Whether they fight him or run from him, they are still his property."

"Am I his property now?" Was his neutral response. to the question.

Miranda didn't even pause to think about it.

"Of course you are. Oh yes, putting the control chip into you was my idea, but as it turned out, he really had no need for a control chip when he knows all the right _buttons_ to press." She returned, her words stressing buttons. "Guilt is powerful motivator. One he uses by putting you on this mission. As more and more colonies vanish, your resolve to fight them grows stronger and his fatherly support to you becomes more and more solidified."

Shepard silently inhaled, having forgotten to breath as he stared hard at Miranda,.

"Why are you telling me this?" He finally inquired, feeling somewhat faint at the little secret told by the operative. He felt Miranda's hand touch against his forearm, like mother finished lecturing her child. Her dark eyes burned into his.

"Because despite our difference, I'm starting to like you." She whispered, a half smile for him. "Because I know you're falling into the same trap as I."

As the elevator doors to Deck Three opened, Shepard attention unfocused. without anymore reason to be in her company, he unceremoniously placed everything in his arms into Miranda's. The full suit of armor, his weapons, both attached and not. She stumbled slightly and glowered at the responsibility handed to her.

"Thanks for the head up, Miranda." Shepard returned. "Meet me in my room in two hours. Bring food."

The elevator doors closed, leaving Miranda scowling.

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The elevator door slid open. Tali remained still for an extra moment, her mind debating what she planned for herself and the man only metres from her now. Oh keelah, she could not believe she was going through with this. No... she was not ready mentally or physically to have sex with him, despite hormones screaming at her to take him...but what was wrong with a little fun?

All she needed was Just enough to get her body back under control and to inform her captain that she was giving herself to him. It was a gift she could finally repay her captain for everything he had done for her without asking a thing, who made a sacrifice for confessing that he was interested in a quarian would would never likely be able to leave this damn suit permanently.

Of course, then there were the purely selfish motivations. She had seen Shepard mostly naked not a week ago. It was a sight she would not mind to see once again...

"EDI, could you ruin the decontamination unit for this room?" She asked the glowing pedestal. "And please... discretion."

_"Decontamination in progress... Discretion will be used."_

Happy that EDI would pay mind to her request; She wandered into his quarters, the hissing of water almost surprised her. Yes... he was showering, unknowingly taking precautions to minimize bacteria. Good. Everything was going according to plan for once.

She paused as she reached his desk, there smiling back at her was none other than Liara T'Soni.

Liara T'Soni. That was a woman.. well... genderless being she had hoped to never see again. They may have been friends on the Normandy, she may have even liked her when she announced Shepard and her were seeing each other. What was unforgivable was how horrid she had become when they found her on Illium, obsessed over finding and destroying the Shadow Broker, using Shepard to further her hunt then blaming him for it.

Shepard... John was devastated. He did not show it, in fact it barely seemed to faze him in the eyes of those now following him, but she knew. She knew him better than anyone else; Perhaps even better than Garrus, and those two were half in love with one another. Tali almost felt guilty for stealing Shepard away from him.

_Almost._

Glaring at the photo of the smiling Liara T'Soni one last time, Tali let go of it, accidentally on purpose dropping the frame into Shepard's empty waste basket. _Oops_... careless her. it was was clearly the fault of her clumsy hands and not what she planned to do should she ever see Liara T'Soni ever again.

_"Decontamination cycle complete... Do be careful."_

She closed her eyes and exhaled. Her hand reached up and unlocked and removed the visor.

The room was brighter without the tinted visor impairing her vision. The air tasted fresh. her head felt hazy as the scent of alien became more and more pronounced. There was no going back now. She was exposed and she was going to get really sick.

So... if she was going to get really sick, then it might as well be for some unregrettable fun.

Piece by piece the suit was pulled off exposing more and more of her flesh to the vacant cabin. She could feel her small nipples harden as they touched and reacted against the relatively cool air. Well... either it was the cool air, or it was the sound of Shepard, muttering something in the shower.

Whether it was the thoughts of Shepard or simply the air, one thing was undeniable. This room was much too cold. Tali shivered and bowed her head as though it would shield her from the temperature, from the bacteria. She did her best to remember that her fears were purely psychological in nature. All she needed to do was relax. Doctor Solus would not have let her do this if it wasn't one hundred and fifty percent safe for her.

Taking control of her unsteady breathing, she turned and examined her faint image in the glass of the aquarium. She stared at each curve, at each scar She exhaled. She was standing naked inside her Captain's quarters. A man who had expressed just how much he wanted her in this state. Oh Keelah. she needed to find something to wear in order to give herself a chance.

Tali stepped lightly down to where she recalled, Shepard stored all of his clothing. They would not fix her lithe frame, but it was better than nothing.

As Tali dug through the drawers, she grew more and more alarmed at what she was finding. Shepard, it seemed, had not found the time to buy clothing. Instead he relied on Cerberus for his fashion sense... which meant all of his outfits had Cerberus Insignia's everywhere. If her parents could see her now, planning to don the clothing of the Fleet's most dangerous non-geth enemy, they would have disowned her. It was as simple as that.

She shuddered slightly as she gave the large outfit n appraising look. Well... for now it was better than nothing.

Silently, she pulled the soft shirt over her head, shuddering softly yet again as the soft fabric pressed against her hypersensitive breasts, breasts that needed strong, calloused hands caressing them. Somehow, she managed to get the pants on without any fuss. Though he was built much larger than she, she had the benefits of wide hips that kept the pants from sliding back off her.

Finally came the socks, which proved to be most difficult to put on. Her feet were huge. She managed to get them on half way, they somehow touched the heel of her feet. Well it was good enough.

With the clothing now on, Tali sighed and leaned back, her back arching against Shepard's bed, bouncing. Her yelped at the sensation of the bedding, how soft it really was. Silently, she decided, John lived like a king in this room. A room she was given free pass to be in, but only now could she appreciate it.

Her knees rubbed against one another, sparking her nerves, barely used without the suit's assistant. She groaned as she tugged up the shirt's collar and breathed in deeply. It was clean, but it had the faintest scent of Shepard on it. That glorious fragrant that told her when he was near her.

She could feel herself pulsing now, sex organs pushing out and contracting inside of her, begging for her to forget her desire to keep this encounter as just having some fun and instead, as a quest for her to lose her virginity. She wanted to.. oh keelah, she did... she wanted him...

But she would not have him in that way. Not yet... not until everything was in order, not until Doctor Solus felt it safe enough to push into that intimacy, not until John and her could make this relationship deeper than a few spoken words.

All of this was just a dip into the pool.. The last thing she needed to do was confront Shepard on some overly romantic time to make love, only for her to orgasm every thirty odd seconds he was with her. Shepard may not mind knowing that he was capable of doing that, but The last thing he needed right now was punctured eardrums and a broken pelvis.

Not broken, _shattered_.

Self control vanished as her hand -now exploring her body, touching ever curve moved low pushing down past the shirt she wore and into the loose trousers. She unsteadily exhaled as her long slender fingered gripped her mound. She had only done this once... okay, twice before. Both of those occasions filled with thoughts focused on a human.

A finger pushed though folds and carefully slipped inside her. Tali arched her back, and hummed happily at the shock. Her free hand hand curling a handful of John's bedding into a tight ball.

As she moved in and out at a slow unsteady pace, she thought of his words. She thought of the way he held her, touched her, the way he looked at her. Oh keelah, the way he looked at her, like he was carefully checking out how to pull her environmental suit off her the quickest way possible. she bit her lip ad groaned as she felt her finger pulsing away inside her. She could hear the shower still hissing. At any moment he could walk in on her. That did not matter, not when she laying in the bed of a man who made her feel like a woman.

It was a thrill she was never expecting to do, doing this on the bed of her captain. All her fears for her immune system vanished as she again hissed and fought the urge to cry out. Her mind wandered back to what it would feel like to have John in control.. even hotter, under her control.

The fingers in her burned away at the thought of that -controlling Shepard through eroticism. Thoughts about him inside of her, but her in control fueled fantasies she never dared to imagine as her fingers sped up.

She was dripping now, the borrowed pants crouch was soaked through and through from. The pangs of an orgasm making her mind dulled. She ignored how stupid she suddenly felt and rolled over onto her chest, fingers still pushed so deep she could feel her slick cervix, grazing it erupted a louder moan as her body shook. Her mind was racing, she was fighting the urge to pull out, stand up and ambush Shepard in the shower.

The grip her teeth had on her lips released. before she could comprehend it She moaned, long and groaning. Only one word was spoken as she came.

"_Joohn."_

**...**

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**...**

_"Son of bitch. Thinks he can manipulate me... I'll show him."_

Shepard may have been grumbling to himself about the little nugget of truth give to him generously by Miranda Lawson, but it frightened him just how right she was. He did not want to believe it, but Miranda was correct. The Illusive Man found a weakness and exploited it: His desire to see the Reaper Fleet burning and scattered across the depths of space.

Illusive Man did something that the Council, even the Alliance couldn't or wouldn't do. He believed in the Commander's fears. He did not just talk about stopping the Reapers and Collectors. He threw credits at the problem, credits that bought him Shepard's life and a ship capable of raining death on the Collectors. With him in the Illusive Man's pocket, the Cerberus founder fueled the Spectre with more and more Intel, infuriating the soldier more and more.

He was right where the man wanted him to be, a more efficient tool than anything the Illusive Man had before. Shepard wasn't surprised at his thought. He had been a tool for another man since he became an adult. A tool for an opportunist, a tool for the Alliance, a tool for the Council.

This time was different. For the first time in his life; he wished he had listened to his father and stayed the hell out of the Alliance's grasp.

"_Joohn."_

That's about his situation vanished as Shepard looked up as he finished washing the last of the stinging body off him. What in the hell was that?

Turning off the shower and dressing quickly, he stepped out and found himself not alone.

Someone stood there with her back turned, in an ill fitted Cerberus uniform. A outfits that hid curves he had explored. There was hair, or what he assumed was hair long, clumped together like strangely elegant looking dreadlocks.

At her feet, long and stained in his socks was a familiar environmental suit, purple, gold and black scattered haphazardly on his floor, her helmet rested on top of the pile, carefully laid on top of a beautiful hood handed down to her by her mother .

"_Tali_?" he finally whispered, unable to believe his eyes.

At the call of her name. The woman turned and faced him. Her eyes were wide and bright as they stared at him. She was pale, deathy pale. Her forehead elongated just a bit more than most other humans in comparison, the braidlike strains fell freely over her face. She bowed her head, looking suddenly shy under the intense stare he had on her

Slowly, he stepped forward to her, pushing himself down to her level. He could not help but smile at her. Tali followed his example and shyly she approached as well, closing the gap between man and woman.

"Tali... you didn't have to do this." Shepard started, despite his concerns he still found himself dazed at the sight.

Tali shook her head, her head still bowed but there was still enough daring in her for her hand to reach up and grip his arm, skin at long last touching skin. He could feel her shudder as she closed the last of the pace between them. Her chest pressed against his. Ge could feel the heartbeat pounding in her chest... It sounded so different... three beats instead of his two.

For the first time he could get a scent off her. It was sweet, like a sweet fruit he could not put a finger on. Not when his thoughts were so focused on the dark haired bright eyed beauty looking at him adoringly.

"No, John, I really had to." Tali whispered back, looking up at him finally. "I don't want my unmasking to be some big dramatic deal."

A big dramatic deal? She surprised him with a unannounced visit, and tore her environmental suit off her body while he was in the middle of a shower prescribed by Mordin Solus... Goddammit. Mordin was yanking his chain in order to maker this encounter happen. He wasn't sure whether to reprimand the good doctor or buy him a steak.

"I thought exposing yourself was something you do in only the most intimate of company." He spoke up, finally finding he words. "We haven't made anything official yet."

Tali appeared unfazed by his correct statement.

"Even if this was nothing, you would still be only person I could trust to be in this sort of state..." Tali shot back. She ducked her head briefly before turning back up and coyly adding. "You idiot."

Her hard hands pulled him down onwards the bed. He watched carefully the way the woman moved, She had more movement than she did in her suit, her body seemed more flexible, as though that was even possible.

"You know, you're a lot more bouncy outside of your suit." He pointed out, earning a raising of Tali's brow.

"The suit restricts much movement. It makes us almost as rigid as your people." She explained. She paused, her lips forming a smirk as she added. "I am surprised humans walk so straight forward, though. Considering your evolutionary ancestors and all."

Shepard groaned to himself. What was with non-humans and pointing out humanity's origins still being present on Earth? It was a phenomenon that no other known advanced species had in common. Often it was a source of insults, meant to demean just how quickpaced humanity was compared to the other species. With Tali however, it was a different spirit, a source of humor for her, not one a remark spoken out of anger.

"When I find out whatever your lot came from. I'm not going to go easy on you. Just you wait, beautiful."

Tali rolled her wide, warm, bright eyes and giggled, her hand snapped out and playfully slapped against her captain's chest.

"Oh _keelah_, I'm dating a primate. My father would be so ashamed." She bemoaned, her voice thick with sarcasm as she gazed up at him.

Shepard widened his eyes at the remark. Dating? Did he miss that memo? Tali's eyes widened as well, shocked by the slip up. Her face warmed up, darkening her gray cheeks. She ducked her head, and tried to hide the embarrassment.

"I mean... um, Do you want this _official_?" Tali added, her voice very shy, despite bluntly teasing him no more than half a minute ago. "We have had conversations and talked and I know that all of this is going to be frustrating for you. I'm bound to be down for the next week just to have a few hours with you... And... well."

Shepard reached up, his hand finding itself pressed against her cheek. The touched almost instantly brought her stuttering to a stand still.. The skin was harder than his, more dense; Alien in comparison to his own. asari flesh and quarian flesh were not one and the same. It was more like turian scales converted into skin.

Through, her skin was dense, he could still feel the cybernetic implanted skin deep. It was not unlike his own. It made sense now... Why she was so okay with all this. Okay with him being a walking sack of meat and machinery when he got to the basics of the Lazarus project. Cybernetics were a commonplace amongst other species.

"Tali, I want too be with you... I just wasn't sure how to start it."Shepard admitted as his fingertips still grazed her cheek like it was glass. He smiled as Tali bounced excitedly in his arms. "Still, I didn't need you out of your suit to tell me that we're seeing each other."

Tali shuffled nervously.

"I know, I did not want to risk the chance of revealing it to you the night when I'm ready to... well, only for you to think me as some horrid monster and not... well... someone you'd want to... want to... _you know_." Tali trailed off, shrugging helpless.

John nodded. He understood her fears. Not that they held any fact to them. He did care about her. Looks, as everyone assumed, did not mean a helluva lot to him.

"Okay, I guess that's a reasonable fear." Shepard finally returned, his eyes checking over the quarian still. "That doesn't explain why in the hell you're wearing a Cerberus outfit."

Tali shrugged.

"You don't have anything else to wear... Besides I don't know..." She trailed off yet agin, her face forming into a guilty look. She bounced on her toes as she whispered. "Perhaps I was looking for a thrill as well. What other opportunity will I have try out the uniform of an avowed enemy. I think it looks nice, in all honesty."

"If you'd like I could go and raid Lawson's wardrobe." He spoke up, trying not to laugh. "Might have a few pieces to wear that'll fit those curves better."

Tali placed her hand on her hip.

_"I should have known you would do anything to get me into one of Lawson's catsuit."_

Shepard and Tali lost it, their combined laughter echoed through the cabin. It was a good idea. No one could accuse Miranda of horrible fashion sense. Even Tali appeared almost fascinated by the outfits that woman could pull off.

Chuckled he glanced away and noticed something odd: His bed appeared ruffled up. It was like someone had a fit while laying on it. He sniffed the air in its direction, it had the exact same scent permeating from Tali. He pulled away briefly and gave it a careful stare. Inwardly his mind was in overdrive... oh he knew exactly what this was. Such things seemed to transcend species.

"What's that?" he turned back and decided to point out, doing his utmost not to appear too coy..

Tali's glanced at the rumpled bed that appeared damp. Her eyes went wide at the bed sheets Shepard was staring at. All Tali could do was wring her hands.

"What? I... nothing. Nothing happened at all." Was her quick denial as she attempted to remain perfectly casual. The casualness, however gave it away right away. It seemed that the suit left Tali with another downside. She had a terrible pokerface without her helmet hiding her.

"Except that I heard you say my name in the shower... you wer-"

Before Shepard could finish his thoughts, Tali's hand flew over his mouth, clamping it tightly shut.

"Alright I was! Drop it please!" She hissed at him. Her eyes begging that he did not verbalize that rather dirty thoughts he was thinking. This was so not his fault. He wasn't the one doing that!

Shepard held his hands up in a fake surrender and turned away, his hand rubbing his chin as he simply stared at the stain on the blanket. Tali shuffled nervously. She really did not like the focus he held on it.

"I'm not sure what I want to do with it, get it washed or cut it out and hang it on my wall as a badge of honor." He mused to himself, his mouth unable to contain the grin he was holding back.

Tali reared back to face him. Her teeth bared at the Man. If Shepard wasn't a brave man, he probably would have blanched at just how sharp the teeth in her mouth were.

"What's so amazing about me doing... _doing_... that." She finally whispered, her not turning in a show of determination to forget that her masturbating had never happened. Surprising the poor quarian, Shepard bumped into the girl playfully. Much to his own surprise, she growled lowly, mutinous at the teasing.

"Just didn't think you were the sort of girl who would do that." He explained, his grin only growing wider as he watched her scowl grow as well.

"I don't do it often and I don't like to talk about personal things. That does not mean I'm some chaste... _prude_." Tali shot back, her tone now defensive as she crossed her arms and added. "I have just as many feelings, urges... desires as you do. I just don't get to work them out."

Shepard nodded, still unable to shake his awful grin.

"I see... so is there any boys back on the fleet I need to worry about? Any boyfriends I might have spited?" Shepard spoke, his eyebrow raised.

"I... um... no. Too be honest; there was no time for that. I really wasn't really interested in a boy until I turned 22, Shepard." She admitted, her lips nearly touching his. She smiled mischievously as she watched the Shepard's face break into one of shock. He was the first crush? Oh Christ...

Tali tilted her head, her long narrow hands reaching out to squeeze his. Softly, she breathed.

"What can I say? I suppose five fingers appealed to me."

Then it happened: Tali leaned in and for the first time, caught his lips with her own. It was not perfect, but it didn't have to be. She made up for it with the sheer sweetness to it. It was a first kiss, sort of kiss. The kind he had with Kefilwe Van Rooyen back in the seventh grade, a sweet girl of Afrikaner/Swahili origins. The first girl in his life. Now here he was, being the first man in Tali's.

He pushed back into the kiss gentle. He stepped forward, she stepped back. For the briefest of moment, he pulled back.

"I'll follow your lead. We'll go at your pace. We'll do this together, okay?" He softly whispered directly into her mouth. He leaned in and again, kissed chastely. He looked up and noticed Tali's eyes were already glazed. She nodded blankly and kissed him back. Hard, a little more daring.

She swung back around and took control of their movements Before he realized it, he was sitting on his bed with Tali on top of him, each of her flexible legs on either side of his thighs. She was now feeling brave enough to increase the passion in the kiss. Her mouth up slightly, her tongue flickered nervously as it touched the tip of his.

She almost yelped and pulled her head back, her sharp looking teeth forming a bright smile at what she had just done and just how surprisingly unaffected she felt by saliva that was not only was guaranteed to get her sick, but could also induce anaphylatic shock in the worse case. It seemed that Tali had gotten off light in that one area. Good.

He too seemed unaffected by it. His Alliance medical records said that he would get very ill at ingesting of anything dextro oriented. Then again, alot had changed between then and now... What he needed was a test. His hand moved from Tali and slide slowly up the side of her thigh. He watched as Tali purred and pulled back, her eyes following his hand.

What are you doing _Shep_-"

Tali exhaled a whimper as her pelvis pushed down into his, burying the hand that had run along the crotch of her borrowed and very damp pants. He watched her bit her lip as he slowly brought the hand up, now glistened and smelling very distinctly like the sugary fruit he smelled earlier.

Tali's eyes, fogged over with lust watched the fingers attached to the hand as it carefully touched against his tongue. It was as sweet as he could smell... more importantly it didn't induce a fit of coughing. He would have to take these finds to Mordin to confirm them. He looked up and smiled at the woman, gap mouthed and staring at him as though it was her first Christmas.

"You know..." He finally spoke with a smirk in his voice, "With a little patience and a lot of precaution, I'm going to show you why tasting you is going to make your life that much better."

His words were daring and somewhat less than puritan, but his father always told him, the way to a girls heart was through her vagina. As it turned out, his father was a genius. Tali jumped back on him, breasts pushed into his chest as she kissed with an unbridled passion, her pelvis grinding futility into his.

John's eyes rolled back as sharp quarian teeth latched tightly around his neck, his wrist were grabbed by the quarian and were now secured over his head as Tali'Zorah vas Normandy, the suddenly passion drunk quarian had her way with him.

All his fears about the Illusive Man vanished. A lovesick Tali, bursting at the seams with barely repressed hormones became his number one problem to rectify. He would deal with that glowy eyed bastard later.

**...**

* * *

**...**

It could not be said that Miranda Lawson wasn't a lenient Executive Officer for Shepard. Giving him a full extra hour of rest was more that what she could say for others.

In one of her hands was her datapad, the other, balancing a tray of breakfast foods -bacon, pancakes, waffles. enough to feed both of them while they got this over with. Getting Shepard to file reports was like pulling teeth. He hated the concept of answering to the Illusive Man for anything.

At least this time he seemed more willing. If there was anything that could be done to shake the Collectors off their tail, the he seemed more than happy to grovel to the boss. Maybe not grovel, but close.

"EDI, let me in." She ordered, a little more terse than she intended. The ship's AI was not perturbed however.

_The room is off limits, Commander Shepard's orders._

Miranda rolled her eyes, how childish of him to actually order EDI to disbar her from this room. She had no time for playing around. She had a report to file, a crew complaint issued against Serviceman Richard Hadley, who in his frustration for the attack on Ferris field, went after Rupert Gardener for no apparent reason.

On top of that she was sending hours on end tracking the incoming and outgoing messages between her bastard father and his lackeys and reassuring Ori that no one, no one was ever going to harm her or her adopted parents. Not if she had anything to say about it.

Life with attachments, it seemed,was much more challenging than she ever imagined. Not that she minded it. She was happy to finally no longer be her sister's silent keeper. All thanks to Shepard poking her into making contact. Now they were even. She brought him back to life, and he found her a life that did not need to be at her employers beck and call.

Well... maybe the debt swung more in her favor. She did spend two years bringing him back, only to let a quarian, of all people get her claws into him. She didn't mind it though... much.

"EDI, This is Executive Officer Miranda Lawson, clearance code 4H0X- V729- 7092. Command override." She finally barked. There was a brief pause.

_"Acknowledged. Standing by."_

"Open the door. "

The door lit green and swung open. The bedroom was dark. Emboldened by a need to get this task over with, she stepped inside.

"Time to wake up Commander, we have a report to write." She called out, her diafram making a commanding call out to her CO.

She got no reply at first, She watched as the mass under the blankets shuffled around. Miranda squinted and was caught off guard by the strange, sweet scent that seemed to get stronger the closer she got to the Commander's bed. It smelled... odd, foreign to anything she could match it to.

"Come back later, Miranda." Shepard mumbled, his mouth sounded full, like he was muttering into his pillow. Miranda rolled her eyes and stepped forward, setting the tray of breakfast foods on his table.

"Commander, let's just get this over with-."

Lawson nearly cursed as her foot collided with a pile of metal and reactive armor. Miranda turned her eyes down to glare at it. through the ambient lighting she could make up a lot of purple. Frowning, she leaned down and picked up what was on the top of the pile, her eyes adjusted and found herself staring into a clouded environmental suit visor...

Miranda's eyes widened, she looked up as she heard a feminine growl erupt fro the Commander's bed. The blankets were pushed aside and up came a pale alien with easily a dozen lovebites planted on her near translucent skin. She was attempting to unruffled a Cerberus personal uniform that was riding low, reveal perky cleavage to the operative.

With her strange three fingered hand she pushed back her long, almost braidlike hair back from out of her eyes, as bright as Luna. Shepard too emerged from the blanket: Shirtless and grinning like Christmas had come early for him. When he caught her wide stare, he did his utmost to suppress it. He failed, naturally.

Lawson swallowed the lump in her throat. It really was Tali unmasked in front of her, let alone wearing a Cerberus outfit something she dared never thought to see.

"_Miranda_, please leave. before you contaminate this room anymore." Tali requested politely, though her eyes held a fire in them. "If you ruin this for me, I am _never_ going to forgive you."

Miranda looked from Tali, to Shepard, whose grin reformed into a slick smile. She simply glared and turned back to Tali, allowing the quarian a nod. She turned, vowing to wash the imagine from out of her brain with bleach. Tali was cute, there was no doubt about that. But that did not mean she wanted to see that...

"You don't mind if I borrow one of your Catsuit for Tali, would you?" Shepard crowed from the bed "Purely for professional reasons of course. Can't very well have Tali running around nude in my quarters."

Without turning to look, Miranda swung her hand back and showed the Commander her middle finger. All Shepard could do was laugh.

...

* * *

...

_How could he be possibly laughing at this! This was terrible!_

Fighting the heat and blush coming to her face, Tali buried her head into John's chest. The display only served to make the Commander laugh even more.

"How is any of this funny?" Tali demanded from him. trying to suppress the urge to launch herself off the bed and knock down the retreating Lawson. "S-she walked in.. on us. Don't you have boundaries?"

"It'll be fine. She knows discreti-"

Before Shepard could sooth her with assurances, Tali's head reared back and much to her horror, she violently sneezed, coating the suddenly shocked looking human's face with a mixture of spit and mucus. Tali reared back, her eye and mouth gaping. quickly her hand covered her mouth. John didn't move. He simply sat there, unmoving to the disgusting fluids splattered on his face.

"Oh... oh keelah Shepard, I'm so sorry." She mumbled, attempting to wiping her nose and mouth before tending to him.

Shepard shook his head and wiped the fluids off with his forearm. despite the disgusting situation he found himself now in, he still managed to smile for her as though nothing had happened. Like he had expected it to happen.

"It's fine." He murmured, wiping his hands on the blanket unceremoniously. "Might be best to get you into your suit and down to a doctor."

Tali nodded weakly and tried to shy away as she scattered off the bed to collect. Shepard's hand reached out and dripped her bicep, surprising her. She turned back and found him pressing his lips to her forehead.

"Hey, this was one of the risks, and side effects to all of this." He reminded her. "You know that, I know that. You also know that I'm going to be there, even if you're spitting and sneezing all over me. Okay?"

Tali nodded halfheartedly, still very much ashamed by herself and the bodily functions she could not control despite her irrational conviction that she could. She could not finds nay words to give to him that could express how mortified she was. Yet again, Shepard shook her shoulder playfully, his eyebrows raised.

"_Okay_?" He repeated once more.

Tali nodded slightly, feeling somewhat better with herself, due to John's good natured reassurance.

"Okay." She agreed finally, looking once more up into his eyes. Shepard smiled, and leaned in for a careful kiss on her cheek. Just as she slumped into his arms, she found herself suddenly off the bed and standing.

"Good, now get undressed and get back in that suit." Shepard ordered, his captain's voice returning to him. "This'll be the perfect time to inspect your goods. Next time though, bring a box of Kleenex up with you. You're surprisingly, horribly sticky."

Tali did her absolute best not to turn around and showed her just how foul tempered a sick quarian could be.

**...**

* * *

**...**

**Another story down. Hope you liked it enough to tell me :)**

**Next: Favorite Spot on the Citadel: Shepard's birthday brings about questions about his future -if he even has one after the Reaper's. He heads down to that dinging little alley in the wards where he saved Tali. For a man who never had many thoughts about a future that involved his survival, he know can't think of a future that didn't have Tali in it standing right next to him.**

**Update: I did a big overhaul last night, fixing the errors and such. It seems that didn't apply them. Sorry for being annoyed in the review sections. When I release another story. Do me a favor though, if you see a mistake, don't be vague about it. I like specifics. It makes my job easier. Sparing my feelings by being vague only serves to fuel my rage.**


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Mass Effect, Humor, Romance