Final Fantasy VII 1. Chapter 1

One day cloud and tifa was in the slums and it was raining. Tifa's massive gelatinous boobs were so big they were huge. She used them as an umbrella to block out the rain. They ran into the seventh heaven. But when they got inside... BARRAT WAS HAVING SEX WITH AERIS GOST! Aeris moaned (both cuz she was sex and having a ghost).

"You can't have sex with that ghost!" Cloud shooted, pointing objection at Barret,

"Why THE HELL NOT" Barret bellowed.

"Because she is... EVIL!" Clown explained. Everyone gassed and turned around to Aeris.

"Now that you have found out my deepest darkest secret" aeris moaned"im going to have to KILL U!"

Then aerist pulled out a rocket launcher and pointed it at clod. "NO AERIS NO" tifa screamed and she jumped in front of the rocket and it exploded but her chest was so huge it acted like a cushion and she survived the impact!

"No! That was my only rocket!" Aeris wailed.

"Hahahah" Cloud laughed "It looks like the tables have been turned on you!" Then cloud got on his moterbike and drove away! The music played when they were escaping from hobos lab played in the back ground.

"Oh no you don't!" Aeris shouted and then she summoned metor and got on top of it and began drive it!

"Cling cling cling" went clod and meteor as they fraught. Some shinra shoulders tried to cum but they was too fat. Suddenly the rode ended and loud and easier went off a ramp that went like throught 100 feet in the air and landed on Yuffie and she got deaded But everyone was happy because she was a bitch and nobody liked her!

They landed in sector 13 where the mako reactor was reacting. Aeris drove right into the life stream and there was a huge explosion and cloud had to outrun faster than the explosion!

When he got back to the seventh heaven barret was doing BAD THINGS with yuffies ZOMBIE.

"shit dawg get the fuck out!" said Barrette.

"NO TIME" said cloud screamed "LOOK UP THERE!" He pointed up at the sky where it was raining and there was easier but now she was in her final boss form...as a ghost!

"Booo!" said Aeris and she came down and made cloud angrier!

"Im going to get you ghost!" cloud exclaimed. Then he got on his phone and dailed the turkeys. The number was 666-6666 because the reno was sexy! (Geddit? Six? Sex?)

"What is that" said the reno to cloud on the other end of the phone.

"Aeris is back and she is EVIL goat now!" cloud explained.

"WHAT" Reno derped.

"BUT YOU ARE OUR ONLY HOPE!" Cloud roared into the receiver where reno was on the other end where he was listening!

"BUT WUT IF SHE EATS ME?" Reno cried.

"She won't eat you..." cloud said "because...I AM AERIST GOST!"

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><p>Gasp! Plot twist! I bet you guys didn't see that one cuming!<p>


	2. Chapter 2

I jsut realized its been a while since i posted a chapter for this story so HERE U GAIZ GO

BY THE WAY, THIS IS A MESSAGE 4 ALL U HATERS

STFU

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><p>"But if your ghost" Reno shouted at the top of lung"THEN WHO WAS PHONE?"<p>

But nobody was already gone...

"Who was that honey bunny?" said rude from that bed there laying in a sexy position and wearing a sexy man thong. "Why don't you come back to bed baby".

"It was cloud" Reno said "Cloud is being hunted by aeris ghost".

"A GHOST?" Rude shouted "THERES ONLY 1 THING TO DO IN THIS SITUATION". So they called the ghost busters. But suddenly, rudes phone rang. He picked up up. "Hello"

"Is this the gost busters?" said the dude on the other line and it was reno and suddenly they realized that THEY HAD SECRETELY BEEN GHOST BUSTERS THE HOLE TIEM!

"GASP" exclaimed Reno. "I'll go get my ghost blower!" (You know those things on their backs that gets sucked up gosts that look like leaf blowers but idk what they are so i'm calling them ghost blowers).

Meanwhile Cloud was trying to make toast but aeris had possessed the toaster and wouldn't give it to him. "PLEASE AERIS! YOUR BURNING MY TOAST" Cloud screamed and he fell to the floor and soobed, begging for Aeris to stop.

"Fine" Aeris said and she shooted the burning toast at cloud. It hit his face and he fell to the floor and died.

"Muahahaha" said Aerist toaster. Then she started shooting burnt toast everywhere!

"WATCH OUT GAIZ" screamed Tifa jumping in front of her friends. He boobs acted as a barrier and the toasts ricocheted off them and hit the toasted and forced aeris to leave the toast. Because she had nothing to posses she started bouncing around the room.

"LETS GET OUT OF HERE" said barret and he and tifa and yuffie zombie ran outside.

Just then the TURKS BUSTED ONTO THE SCENE.

"WHERE IS THE GHOST?" Rude screamed. He was still wearing nothing but his sexy man thong.

"Its in there" Tifa said pointing at the seventh place.

Rude and Reno and the rest of the turks all creeped up in there but when they got inside aeris ghost was nothing but dissapeared.

Then a skeleton popped out.

"BOO" he said.

All the turks screamed. But then they realized it was just Vincent.

"I need moar blood!" he groaned.

"Oh vincent" the Turks said and they laughed.

BUTT THEN

…Aeris Ghost came back!

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><p>Sry another cliff hanger yes i no im evil!<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

I relized I neglect this story so here chaper 3. Enoy!

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><p>"Wait!" Areis said as they took out their wepon "I give up! I just want to be gewd again".<p>

"DON'T BELIEF HER MY DIGGAS" Barret roared "She SEDUCED ME into SEDUCING HER"

"THEN WHY" Tifa exclimationed "DID RAID MY PANTY DRAWR?"

"I didn't raid your panty drawn" Aeris sed, looking at Tifa with disapprove.

"Then who..." Everyone turned to vincent "VINCENT"

"VUT" Vincent said in his sexy pennsylvanian accent "I dont know vut you guys are talking avout".

"Then why does your undywear say "Property of Tifa" gargled yuffie

"Vait?" Vincent said, looking down at his on pants "Vow did you know vat?"

"I have..." Yufffi said "ZOMBIE X-RAY VISIONS!"

"Le Gasp" Everyone said.

Suddenly vincent laughed and smiled and pulled out a remote control. "I have your panties hostage!" Vincent said, unvailing a curtain. Behind the curtain was Tifas favorite patsu, black and slightly see through with red roses and green vines on it, and it was...strapped to bomb!

"Noooo!" Tifa screamed "That's my favorite pair! I'll do anything! Just let them go!"

"Wait dawg" Barret said "If them panties a pair, why aint they 2?"

"Nevermind vat" Vincent said, twidling his fingers evily "Now you have to give in to MY DEMANDS! Muahahaha!"

"I'm outty" Reno said, putting on an extra sexy pair of sun glasses.

"BUT WHAT ABOUT?" Tifa said, turning to them Turks but they was already gone.

"NOW" Vincent said "FIRST OFF, I DEMAND TO BE THE FAN FAVORITE"

"You already are" Yuffie pointed out, rolling her rotting zombie eyes.

"Vine vine" Vincent said "Then...my next demand is...to have MY OWN GAME"

"You DO have your own game" Tifa said "dredge of service? Remember?"

"Oh right" Vincent said. "In that case...I vant my own game...THAT DOESN'T SUCK"

"GASP" everyone went.

"You MONSTER" Aris shooted, shaking her ghosty fists.

"And this time I DONT vant to be rescued by Yuffie! I want to be rescued by SPIDER MAN"

Barret fell to his knees. "THIS CANT BE" he said, pounding his fist into the floor "WRYYYY?". Then he jumped out a 10000 story window.

"Well if that's the case" Tifa said "I guess we better start holding auditions for the spider man role. She took out a note pad, propped it between her gelatinous boobs, and began to write down all of Vincents demands.

"And I vant" vincent added "VILL FERRELL TO PLAY CID".

"Why can't Cid play Cid?" Yuffie asked.

"I DON'T KNOW!" Vincent cried.

"Will Ferrel play Cid" Tifa muttered, writing it down on the notepad.

"Also, I vant it to be in first person style, I vant to kill ZOMBIES, an no reeve in a creepy cat shit suit"

"Shit dawg" Barret said "Are we really pulling off this thingamajig to save a pair of Tiffs under-muh-pants?"

"COURSE WE ARE" Tifa said "CAN WE REALLY CALL OUTSELVES CINEMATOGRAPHERS IF WE TURN DOWN A CHALLENGE LIKE THIS?"

Aeris shook her head. "No we CAN'T" Tifa said "NOW I SAY WE STOP FOOLING AROUND AND GET OURSELVES A REMAKE"

"YEAH" exclaimed Justin Beiber. Then they all did a group fisting (You know...when they tap their fists together. What did you think I meant?) and went to go make Vincents video game.


	4. Chapter 4

This chapter has a special geist.!

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><p>So the people started their remake of forest Gump.<p>

"LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION" Tifa cried.

But nothing happened.

"Oh right twe havn't hired an actor". Tifa said.

Suddenly, the doors opened and...

LIGHTNING CAME

"LIGHTNING!" everyone unisoned.

"I heard you need an actor" lightning honked. Her boobs jiggled.

"I VANT TO PLAY GUMP" Vincent screamed.

"No I think this chick would make a better gump" Cid said, waving at Lightning.

"Yeah" everyone else agreed.

Tifa and Lighting's boobs were both so big, they filled the room and smooshed up against each other.

"I'M ON MY PERIOD" Lightning screamed and she began to crush cid's head inbetween her thighs.

"CUT CUT CUT CUT CUT" Tifa roared.

"What did I do wrong?" Lightning barked.

"NOTHING" Tifa howled back.

"GOT IT" Lightning boomed and she started punching cid's face while crushing his head inbetween her thighs.

MEANWHILE AT THE PREMIER

Everyone had gathered around to see the movie! They even got an extra large movie theater to accomidate Tifa's breasts.

"WAIT A SECOND DAWG" said barret who was standing at the door "WHERE IS YOUR TICKET?"

"I'm CLOUD. REMEMBER? I PLAY THE CLOCKWORK MONKEY." Cloud whimpered.

"AERIS" Vincent bellowed and cloud screamed as a toaster possessed by aeris began to shoot toast at him.

IN THE MOVIE THEATER, EVERYONE WAS THERE. EVEN RUDE IN HIS SEXY MAN THONG.

The lights turned low and the movie reel began to spin.

But...SOMEONE HAD REPLACED THE MOVIE REEL WITH A DISMEMBERED CORPSE

"BOOO" everyone screamed and they began to throw their various possessions at the movie screen.

"I'M A FAILURE" Tifa ran out crying, her massive boobs hitting everybody on the way out.

She found her way to the midgard waterfront where she sat on the dock crying. "Now i'll never make it in film school" she sobbed.

"I thought it was a good movie" said someone and she turned and it was...TEH MIDGARD ZOLITH.

"Really?" Tifa said, wiping a tear away.

"Sure why not" said the massive snake.

THEN THEY MADE OUT.

Meanwhile, back at the movie theater, the movie was so bad, IT STARTED A STAMPEDE.

"WATCH OUT FOR THE ELEPANTS" Yuffie yelled at vincent and pulled him out of the way.

"Vank Uffie" Vincent transylvanianed.

"WOOO" barret wooped as he rode a zebra.

"Is everybody SAFE" Cid emoted.

"Yup" said Vincent

"Accounted for" said Cid as he ate a ciggerate

"I AM HERE" exclaimed Cait Sith.

"I AM A GOST" exclaimed toasterghostaerith.

"Present" mood yuffie.

"All my dreams are died" cried Cloud.

"Here," said Cid.

"I'm okay" said Lightning.

But then they realized...WHERE IS TIFA?!


End file.

Final Fantasy VII, Horror, Supernatural