Harry Potter 1. What the fuzz?

Yr/Tc: Hey! I wanted to do this fic for a wile, about a semester now. So bare with me if it seems odd, but hey it will be funny….I hope. Well here goes nothing.

What the Hell?

The suns rays were an emerald color in the clearing were three girls were all reading. A tall blond girl was reading "Ghost Stories" Her bluish green eyes wide in fascination. Her hair was tucked away in pigtails that just barely reached her shoulders. The medium in height auburn haired girl was reading "The Riddles of Epsilon", her green and brown eyes absorbing every detail. Next to her was a shortish girl with wavy raven black hair, she was reading Ranma ½ her brown eyes filled with laughter.

In the distance you could her laughter and shouting. The noise grew closer and you could here the shouts more clearly. The girls were so absorbed in their own little worlds they couldn't hear it.

"Cody! Come back here! I'm SO going to kill you!" A guy with shaggy hair shouted.

"Grayson, you couldn't 'get me' even if you wanted to!" Replied a short kid with curly hair, His name was apparently Cody.

Cody saw the three girls on the ground and jumped over then skillfully, then kept running. Grayson, unfortunately, didn't see them; well he did….but by then he was on them. He tripped on the blond his head colliding with hers, his hand on her chest to stop himself from falling. He flipped and his butt landed on the auburn haired girl's face; he ended up kicked the raven haired girl in the face. All three girls passed out on impact.

The auburn girl's eye slowly fluttered open. "What the hell? Wasn't I in a clearing a few seconds ago?" She looked down at the blond. "Crystal…Crys…Wake up! WAKE UP!" She started to shake her. Crystal's eyes fluttered open.

"What the hell Elyse?" She looked at Elyse angrily from waking her from her nap.

"Crys, where the hell are we?" Crystal looked around. Her eyes growing each second.

"Elyse it's some sort of castle. Should we wake Ash up?"

"I would think so. She would know were we are."

"Ashley? Ash…Wakey wakey!" They were gently nudging her.

"No ice cream for me mom." Crystal and Elyse looked at each other with faces that clearly said "WHAT THE FUCK!"

"Ashe wake up now. The world is coming to an end!" She just rolled over. Crystal smiled and nodded at Elyse.

"Inu Yasha was canceled." She shot up.

"What the hell? Who in their right mind would cancel that show?" Crystal and Elyse just burst out laughing.

"It wasn't canceled but where the hell are we?" Ash looked around a bit.

"Easy. We are in Hogwarts. This is just like Crys's story "Where are we?"

"Dude she is right! Damn Grayson!"

"But he's cute…."

They both looked at her. RIIIIIIIIIIIGHT.

A group of laughing people walked up.

"OI! Crys! Hey! How are you today?" This came from a, ok I'll admit it, hot guy. He had shaggy brownish hair that looked silky, and deep blue eyes. His pearly white smile shining at her.

"Um, Hi….Who are you?" She was blushing but was staring into his eyes.

"Still suffering from the bonk on your head? I'm Dean Thomas." She smiles sweetly at him.

"Oh, Elyse! HI! How. Are. You. Today?" A guy with shiny red hair and blue eyes said.

"Um…Hi. I'll take a guess you're Ron. And Im confused not a little kid. Talk. To. Me. Normally. Got. It?" She smiled getting her point across when he blushed. "Good."

Ash looked around. She saw a bushy haired girl. "Hermione! Um are those four dating?"

Hermione laughed at Ashley. "The guys wish. The girls haven't noticed. So I noticed Draco staring at you. And it wasn't in a sneering way either. Something up?"

"I really don't know…Is there?"

"OH we have to get to potions! Hurry!"

They all followed Hermione, down twenty million flights of stairs, through twisting halls, till they reached a room that oozed dread.

"Wow….This looks…." Crys stumbled.

"Cheery?" Finished Elyse.

"Yeah….how did you know?"

"Cause we always do that dork."

"Oh yeah we do huh?"

"Yeah."

"Um Elyse Crystal. Come back to Earth!" Ash snapped at them.

"Ash you are just," Elyse started

"Jealous that you don't have our power!" Crystal finished.

"Let us go in before we are late ok?" They all nodded at Hermione.

Ashley, Elyse, Crystal and Hermione were at one table. Dean, Ron, Harry and Neville were at the table next to them. Today they were making some goop that did stuff…Only Hermione understood what they were doing.

Ashley looked down at her green goo. Crystal looked down at her purple goo. Elyse looked down at her light blue goo.

"Hey mine is pretty!" Elyse exclaimed. Every one at her table look at her like she was crazy.

"Mine looks like mold." Ash complained, sighing deeply at her puddle of gunk.

"Mine is depressed. Should I get therapy for it?" That earned Crys the "You need mental help" look.

Draco walked up to Hermione. "Hey mudblood, is your sludge brown to match your blood?" Hermione just sighed and ignored him.

"Hey Asshole, watch who you make fun of."

"EAT GOOP!" All three girls said that at the same time then threw their goop at the same time it hit his head all at once and it sparked. Hermione waved her wand and the goo vanished and left the girls laughing. Draco had fuzzy dog ears on the top of his head.

Ash went up to it and started to rub them gently. Draco started to purr. I mean purring like a cat. All the girls did a group "AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

He turned red to challenge a tomato. Yum…tomatoes. I want a tomato now… Oh right… back to the story… Draco was as red as a tomato. Hermione burst out laughing. Elyse pulled out a wizard camera and snapped a picture of Draco purring and blushing.

Snape walked in on all the noise. "What the hell is going on in here!"

Every one stepped away from Draco so Snape could see Draco. "WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO DRACO?"

Elyse stepped forward. "Well, you see professor, Draco came up and he said 'Hey mudblood, is your sludge brown to match your blood?' And Hermione seemed offended by it. So we all, Crystal, Ashley and I, said 'EAT GOOP' and we all threw our goop at him. So he was in sparkling goo, then Hermione waved a wood thing and it went POOF and he had fuzzy tweak tweak ears!" She smiled after her explanation.

Snape's face grew cloudy. "Well Draco, I can't undo the ears. No one can. Your dad is going to be pissed."

"Its ok, I deserved it. Don't give Ashley detention please. The other two….make them lick the floor clean for all I care. Just not Ashley. She was just doing something I needed."

Every one was looking at him in disbelief. Draco, getting any one but him out of trouble. It was bazaar, especially a Gryffindor. That was a miracle. So everyone's jaw were on the ground. It looked like Fred and George pulled something. I mean the sight of the class room was hilarious if you could see it.

We started to walk out of class when the bells rang Elyse and Crys sighing about the detention. They were to meet up with a teacher. They will be informed who by owl post. Draco came running up.

"Ashley, Hey. Can I talk to you alone please?" Ashley blinked a few times then nodded.

"But you have to lead me back up to the Great Hall deal?" He smile sweetly

"Deal!" They walked off together and we all stood in shock.

"Did I see what I think I thought I saw?"

"Yeah Crys, Our little Ash is off with a guy!"

"Um, I hate to be weird, but she is 18. Is it that odd she is off with a guy?" Ron asked.

Crystal and Elyse shot him a look of disbelief. "Yeah it is. You don't know Ash well do you?" They said at the same time.

"Um, well I guess I don't. But she's 18!"

"She's Ash. It makes perfect sense!"

"Fine! Sorry I asked." He looked down glumly. Elyse went up to him and wrapped her arms around him comfortingly. And then smiled at him when he looked up at her.

"Sorry we got so worked up. But this is a first with ash and we don't know how to deal with it yet. So bare with us until we get used to it. Ok?" She smiled at him warmly again.

"Y..Y…Y….Yeah……" He started to melt just at her smile. He was such a dweeb.

"Ron, breath. You know inhale exhale. Come one." They turned to see Harry standing there. Wow he was hot. My glasses would have fogged up. Wait they did from Ron breathing one them.

"Um, Ron?"

"Yeah Elyse?"

"You are fogging my glasses up."

"I am?" He looked down. Whoa. I am. Sorry Elyse."

"eh, no problem. Happens a lot. Like the time Crys and I made butter beer. That was funny!"

"You know how to make butter beer?"

"Yeah and it's good too. Elyse did all the measuring and stuff. She's great in the kitchen." Crys said brightly.

Elyse blushed a deep red color. "Crys, I love you, but shut it please?"

Crys smiled brightly "Okies. I'll talk about my drawing book. Where is my book…?"

Dean turned to her "You draw too! I love drawing! We are a lot alike! I mean we come from muggle families and we both draw. I think you are AWSOME!" She laughed at him.

"Dean, you are eccentric. Nice to meet ya!"

Crys and Dean flirted shamelessly the whole way to the dorms. When we got to the dorms the girls when up to their room to see that these folding walls were around their beds. Each girl went to their bed, and their room from home came up. The walls grew to the real rooms' size.

Elyse went in hers and it was blue, and had a few floor to ceiling book cases. Her room was decorated to an old English cottage garden. It was beautiful. Her closet was there and so was her dresser and make up table. The night stand even had its hidden compartment were she kept food.

"Hey Crys, Moine! Come to my room!" She shouted out to them. After an hour of Crys eating jelly beans she found bunny gummies. She pulled out a pink one and screamed "ELYES ITS YOUR BROTHER!" Then started bouncing up and down. Then she stopped and a gleam in her eye came. She grabbed some chocolate frogs, a chew wand, and a fairy candy thingy. "LITTLE BUNNY FOO FOO! HOPPING THROUGH THE FOREST! SCOPING UP THE FIELD MICE!(she scoped up the frogs with the other hand, because the right hand had "little bunny foo foo") AND BONKED THEM ON THE HEAD!(she hit the frogs with the chewy wand ribbet!Ribit!ribbet!) DOWN CAME THE GOOD FAIRY AND SHE SAID 'LITTLE BUNNY FOO FOO I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU SCOOPING UP THE FIELD MICE AND BONKING THEM ON THE HEAD! ILL GIVE YOU THREE MORE CHANCES THEN I'LL TURN YOU INTO A GOON! (the little fairy candy thing "sang" that part) LITTLE BUNNEY FOO FOO HOPPINH THROUGH THE FOREST SCOOPING UP THE FIELD MICE AND BONKED THEM ON THE HEAD! DOWN CAME THE GOOD FAIRY AND SHE SAID LITTLE BUNNY FOO FOO I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU SCOPING UP THE FIELD MICE AND BONKING THEM ON THE HEAD! ILL GIVE YOU ONE MORE CHANCE THEN ILL TURN YOU INTO A GOON! LITTLE BUNNY FOO FOO HOPPING THROUGH THE FOREST SCOOPING UP FIELD MICE AND BONKING THEM ON THE HEAD! DOWN CAME THE GOOD FAIRY AND SHE SAID LITTLE BUNNY FOO FOO I GAVE YOU THREE CHANCES NOW IM GOING TO TURN YOU INTO A GOON POOF! YOU ARE A GOON! THE MOREL OF THIS STORY 'HARE TODAY GOON TOMARROW!"

Elyse burst into laughter. "My…Brother…Did….That…For…Mr.GQ!" Elyse started to cry she was laughing so hard and Hermione joined in.

"He did not!"

"He did! I made a move of it! Here. (Elyse handed Hermione a disk) see for yourself when you can." They heard the door gently snap shut. "Ash, That you?"

"Yeah, want me to come into your room thing?"

"Yeah, come on. Hurry!" Ash stepped in and sat at Elyse's desk. "Spill it! What happened with Draco? Spill it now or die, because Crys ate nothing but jelly beans for an hour straight!"

"You gave her that many jelly beans? Are you mental?"

"yes, but that's beside the point. Spill it now!"

"well he asked if I liked his ears, and I said I did, and then he started flirting with me and I was all "INU YASHA!" so I flirted back I guess… and then we just hung out. It was fun. Then he asked me to be his kagome so I spazed. I didn't know he knew about inuyasha…so I said yes. Cause he was cool, and hot…so I have a boy friend."

Elyse and Crys screamed loudly and tackled Ash. "WE ARE SO PROUD OF YOU!"

She smiled "thanks guys. He really is a great guy. Are we all just going to stay in her room tonight?"

"YES!"

"BLANKET FORTS!"

"WOOT!"

"YAY!"

"are we going to study?"

…..blank stares

"sorry I asked."

"GOOD! LET PARRRRRRTY!"

Elyse threw on a boom box of old favorite songs and they danced around like idiots singing into brushes.

Yr/Tc: Sorry that harry wasn't in it much this chappie but he will be REALLY IMPORTANT later. I'll also explain more into why they are here and how. I will all make sence. Later and lots of love! -----Elyse


	2. Socks Tails and Walls

Yr/Tc: Hey! Well I'm going to continue! Even though my only readers are my two best friends! we will advertise it. Cause it will be such a flippen cool story! This might be odd, but I write my notes on napkins and anything I can get my hands on. And All the ideas come from the stupid ass things my friends do. Well, some of them come from things we kinda did but stopped, or were planning to do. Well Here goes nothing!

_Chapter Two: Socks Tails and Walls_

It was a stormy afternoon and Ashley was just as stormy. Draco was being an ass. That's nothing new. He is always an ass. So why was Ash pissed at him? Because he was mad that she wasn't being a bitch. Yup that's right. She wasn't being a bitch. Sound odd to most of you guys? Well it won't soon. Cause Ash was going to get a rude awakening.

"You aren't being a bitch!" His slate colored eyes were twinkling pissed, and frustrated. His little bitch wasn't the same.

"Why would I be being a bitch?" Her hazel eyes were glittering angrily; she was ready to rip his head off.

"You are a bitch, well till you hit your fucking head! Now you are a fucking goody two shoes! Its sickening!"

"First stop cussing, second I have never been and never will be a bitch. Got that clear?" She waved her hand absent mindedly and he started to run in little circles. He looked like a dog chasing his tail. "Draco, don't chase your tail, and why are you running like that?"

"Because, bitch you did wand less magic and are making me do it! Make it stop!"

"I'm not a Bitch!" She screamed at him, she was sick of it. She waved her hand again and he stopped and she stormed off.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

In Elyse's Dorm:

Crystal and Elyse were on Elyse's queen sized light blue bed. It had little curtains around it. Her whole room was so romantic and girly, yet funky at the same time. It was all blue and green with nature pictures she took all over the walls adding splashes of color. She had fresh yellow roses on her bed side table and had her cd player blasting and the two girls were laughing hysterically.

"Crys, my nose needs to get laid." Elyse stated out of no where.

"Lys? What the hell are you thinking?"

"You know when you rub your nose to some one else's?"

"Yeah?"

"That's nose sex, you hand have hand sex, foot sex, tongue sex, eyelash sex, the list goes on. Only my hand has been laid. What about you?"

"Hand sex, tongue sex, and I think that's all. Wait no and nose sex."

"You have very slutty body parts."

"No its only slutty if you have done it with more then one person!"

"Well your hand is a slut, you and Eric, then you and Gray."

"Oh yeah…well still…im not slutty"

"You still have slutty body parts."

"Just my hand"

"No your tongue!"

"It was only once damn it! And I don't think I did it right!"

"Still, it's a slut, its done it! Was it married to his tongue?"

"No…what the fuck Lys, tongues cant get married!"

"So they shouldn't have sex if they aren't married! So it's a slut!"

"You are so screwed up."

"Thanks."

"Lys?" Crys was having trouble choking that one word out she was laughing so hard.

"Crys what's so funny?"

"Think about hand sex. It sounds wrong! So my hand is only a half virgin!"

"No that would be bestiality!"

"What?"

"It's a different body part. Having sex with different species is illegal. So hands and clears throat cant have proper sex, so that's not what im talking about!"

"Ok, so my hand isn't a virgin?"

"NO!"

"But its still a virgin cause it can go farther!"

"Not with out being bestiality!"

"Oh, Ok."

Just then Ash walked in the room and plopped down. She looked so pissed. She stormed for a bit then started mumbling under her breath.

"Ash are you ok?" Lys tossed her a worried look.

"Give me sprinkles. STAT!" ash screamed.

"That bad huh?" Crys stated will she looked for some sprinkles.

"Crys we are witches now, we can summon them now."

"CRYS! STOP IT!"

"What? I'm only rubbing my hands. Oh, hand sex."

"No its masturbation!"

"Oh, I should do that in privet huh?"

"Yeah. Oh and 'accio sprinkles' her ya go Ash!"

"Thanks!" she started eating them like there was no tomorrow.

"What happened Ashiewashi?"

"Lys, ever call me that again you die."

"Ash, just tell us." Crys rolled her eyes at Ash.

"Draco said I wasn't a bitch, and we got in a fight. He said 'you were a bitch till you hit your head'"

"Basterd!"

"I guess the Hogwarts you was a bitch. Odd. Well lets go to food."

""Wait I'm going to bother Dean! Meet ya there!"

MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWM

In a clearing in the woods, three girls were laying on the ground, sleeping. The blond sat up. She looked down at her clothes and issued a loud piercing scream.

"OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! Ash! Lys! Wake up! EW EWWWWWWWWWW! Ash you are going to freak!"

Ash shifted around then sat up. She looked around then looked down at her clothes and Crys's. Her eyes bulged.

"Like, OMG, who put us in these clothes? I'm not in a skirt or pink! And where is your Abercrombie?"

"I don't know!"

"Crystal, Elyse, Ashley?" Cody slowly walked into the clearing.

"Kid, who are you?"

"Ashley are you ok?" Another voice came into the clearing.

"No, I'm in a forest sitting in dirt, in pants, and no wand!"

"Would you rather be pants less, and want use of _my _wand" His eye brows popped up suggestively.

"EW! Who are you?" Ash screamed at him.

"I'm Grayson, your neighbor for like, ever. Are you ok Ashley?"

"Hey, Grayson, do you have some spare Abercrombie clothes? This crap I'm wearing is fucking vile!"

The two guys gave her the oddest of looks after she said that. Crys is very anti Abercrombie, she would not be asking to wear it. And Ash _hates_ skirts with a burning passion. Something right wasn't going on here. They needed to go get help.

"Ashley lets go home, and let's call Crystal's and Elyse's parents."

MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWM

Crys went up to the boys' dorm and knocked at the door. Harry opened up and smiled at her. He let her in and turned to face her.

"Hey Crystal."

"Call me Crys, and hey Harry"

"What brings you to the boys' dorm Crys?"

"I want to bother Dean, is he still here?"

"Yeah third door to the right."

"Thanks Harry. See you at breakfast."

"Yeah, Hey is Elyse already down there?"

"Yeah, call her Lys, she hates it when people say the first letter for some reason. And yeah. Do you like her or something?"

"Well, shes a great girl, but Ron smitten with her, so I'll leave it be. I think it's better that I don't date, that way no one will get hurt when death eaters will try to bring me down."

"Wow, that's morbid, but sweet. Well I hope she and Ron hit it off, she really likes him…I think…I don't know, Lys is odd, she just got dumped by her boyfriend of two years, so I don't know any more."

"Lys had a boyfriend?"

"Err, not in Hogwarts, We aren't From here, Lys can explain it, I cant, I don't understand it. But why else would I have Abercrombie clothes? ICK!"

"You hate….oh god I'm confused. Um later." He walked off shaking his head.

Crystal headed down the hall counting doors. Ok one on the left, one on the right, two on the left, three on the left, four on the left, two on the right, five to the left six to the left, seven to the left, ah finally three to the right. Wow Dean has a long way to walk to his room. She knocked and waited. Two minutes passed and she knocked again. After another two minutes passed she just walked in. Dean was on his bed sleeping. She jumped on the bed and landed on him.

"Dean wake up! Time for breakfast!"

She smiled down at him. He slowly stirred and then woke up staring up at her. She was wearing a black corset looking top that showed a bit of cleavage, with out being slutty looking, her hair flowed down her back and framed her face. She was looking him over, when he stirred he pulled off the cover leaving him only in pajama bottoms. His chest wasn't muscular, but it was all nice I mean it wasn't flat, yet it wasn't all Arnold Swartsinager. His shaggy hair was ruffled from last nights sleep. And he looked so cute wile he was dopey, hell, he looks good when he's not dopey. So err, what was I saying again?

Crystal started to look around his room it was pretty normal. Well, normal as far as she knew about guy rooms, which wasn't much. But oh well. She knew one thing was out of place, and that was a pink sock that had little white bunnies on it. Yes, a pink bunny sock. She jumped off the bed and he stared after her, since her dark jeans showed off her curves and it was a pretty nice view, but he would have stopped her if only he knew the horror that would soon ensue. She picked up the sock and soon began o dance and sing "A sock a sock!" Soon she was running through the school with the sock.

She got down to the Great Hall and saw Harry, she ran over to him and put it to his face and rubbed it back and forth and she was screaming "A SOCK!" and then she ran off to other victims. It was amusing to watch, unless you were Dean and it was your sock on parade. I mean what red blooded guy had a pink bunny sock? At least she didn't say whose sock it was. For that he was grateful. But soon she was sockless and he was panicking. His FAVORIT SOCK was missing. They had to find it and NOW! So Dean got Harry, Hermione, Ron, Lys, Ash, Draco, and Crys. They were to split up and find it.

It was two groups Harry, Hermione, Ron and Lys in the first one and Draco, Ash, Crys and Dean in the second. Soon they had to split again. Ron and Lys went off down this windy twisty corridor o DOOM! THEY ARE GOING TO DIE! HA HA HA HA! Ok just kidding. So they went off down the twisting windy corridor. They walked for a really long time soon Lys got tired and stopped.

"Ron, can we take a break? I'm exhausted!"

"Yeah sure…"

He was having trouble not staring at her. She was wearing a light blue top that was a bit low cut and tight and it had no sleeves. So Lavender told him that's called a tube top. But it looked like it went up into a halter but stopped. It was pretty. And with her top was a tan skirt that was long but skirted around her calves gently. Her little high heels didn't help either. But oh well, even if she was lost she was good looking doing so.

Lys leaned against the wall and started to fall. Ron jumped over to pull her back he caught her, but they continued to fall. Apparently that wasn't a wall. Soon they landed and were covered in dust. Lys tried to stand up but she made a squeaking noise and fell again and started to tear up. Ron looked down at her worriedly and couldn't figure out what to ask but then he settled on a classic.

"Lys, what's wrong?" He sat down next to her balled form and pulled her onto his lap cradling her.

"It's my ankle, I think I twisted it. And it burns. And it's not normal." She was crying into his chest. "I'm such a baby!"

"No, you are just in pain let me look at it. Cause if it's stinging it might be broken.

She moved off his lap and placed her ankle where she was sitting. He didn't look at it long before he knew it was broken.

"Lys, it burns because you broke it and one of the bones broke through your skin. We need to get you to Madam Pomfry soon. Cause she need to heal it, here let me do something to get it stop being as bad till we get to her."

He pulled off his shirt and gently wrapped it around her ankle tightly, yet loose enough where it wouldn't cut off circulation. He pulled her up and slide her onto his back and summoned his broom. She clung to him tightly as he did so.

"I'm going o fly us up to the hall and up to her office, if we get in trouble I'll explain it all. So cling tightly!"

He stepped onto his broom and slide her on in front of him. He took off and she clung to the broom below her and leaned back against Ron and his shirtless chest. She closed her eyes tightly and let out a scream. She seemed to do that a lot lately.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Lys woke up with every one close to her at Hogwarts were sitting around the bed. She must have passed out on her way here. Poor Ron must have freaked out. She was light luckily for him.

"I want to explain to every one why we changed. Ash and Crys are also confused out this, but I figured it out. You said that the us you know hit their heads all at once by walking into a door. Well you see, we were laying in the woods behind Ash's house and her nutty neighbor and brother were trying to kill each other and Grayson fell on our heads. So we must of hit our head at the same time and jumped into each others universe."

"Don't you live in the same universe?"

"Have you ever heard of parallel universes?"

"Yeah, but what does that mean?"

"We are completely different from them because we made different decisions. So when we bonked our heads they went to where we normally are and we came here. So we are us, only here, and I for one like it here better, and Dean summon you damn sock. If you had fucking thought of that I wouldn't be in this damn bed right now! And I could be running or moving around!"

"Sorry Lys!"

"You are so going to pay for this.

"Oh shit."

MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWM

Ashley was laying on the bed off the girl she switched lives with, herself, and looked around. It was messy and plain. And no skirts! What in the world happened to her? Oh well, she can change the wardrobe. If only she could find her wand. Well she can live with it. She can live it. Shit how is she going to live with it!

"Ashley?" Cody called to her running into her room carrying a bottle of lotion. "I need your opinion on if it's a good girly smell! And since you went all girly girl on me I was hoping you could help."

"Yeah come here sweetie!"

"Did you just call me sweetie?"

"Yeah…why wouldn't I?"

"….I don't know. Ok here" He put the bottle to her nose and tried to squeeze the smell out and spilt lotion all over the one skirt she could find. And the green of the lotion didn't look so pretty as a blob in the middle of the black skirt. Damn it.

"It smells nice…now go buy her a new bottle so she wont think it was used. Now I would like some me time!"

"Leaving just don't kick me!"

"And ruin my pedicure? Are you crazy?"


	3. Chapter 3

AN: we have a new char added in. Katie aka "little M&M" so welcome her… she says some crazy stuff.

Dazed and Confrizzled

Chapter 3:

Ash Left the hospital wing after visiting Lys; the one thought as she walked down the corridor was "I want to kill Draco…" Soon she was on the ground.

"Ow… er I'm sorry." She looked up to see that she ran into Draco. "Oh... Well maybe not."

"Oh finally you are being bitchy again!"

"Er...No…Sorry" She goes to storm off when he grabs her arm

"Ash…"

"Ashley"

"Fine Ashley, my ears itch… and I can't get it"

Ashley just laughed at him and reached up and scratched it. Soon he was tickling her and it became world war three.

"You don't do that to a girl!"

"But you're my girlfriend"

"It's a violation Of my personal space!"

"What the hell?"

"Don't cuss!" she threw her hands up in despair and Draco started doing flips and she walked off leaving him like that.

MWMWMWMWMMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMW

Katie walked into the common room and jumped onto the back of the couch where Harry was sitting.

"HARRY! Ron is on the roof… and well he says he can fly with out his broom… I think hes sleep walking again."

"M&M! oh heh… is he near the edge or up higher?"

"um I think the edge but Lys is up there talking to him"

"Oh god, what is she saying?"

flashes to the roof

"Ron, I'm pregnant. It's a blue and green puppy! It's yours!"

"I'm a dad! I can't fly now!"

flashes back to the common room

"You don't want to know… and you are the god father. Night!"

"What in the world are you talking about?" But before he got that out she vanished from the room.

WMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMW

Crystal was walking down the hall playing hide and go see with Dean. But before she could hide she saw Draco doing flips in place. She couldn't help laughing.

"Draco, Ash isn't here, stop trying to impress her."

"She did this to me!"

"Just like chasing your tail?"

"Yes! Now undo it!"

"No this is way too funny!"

"Now"

"In fact this reminds me of a conversation I had with a friend"

flash to muggle world

"I'm keeping...it."

"You can't."

"I can."

"I love it too much. I want to lick it. And squeeze it. And rub its long, slender sides."

"Keep your hands off my ferret"

flash back to now

"Heh... I want to make you a ferret!" She pulled out her want and waved it swiftly and Draco was a ferret doing flips. "Buh bye now."

MWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWMWWMWMWMWMWMWMW

Harry walked into his room to find Lys sitting on it. He blinked then got really confused.

"Hey?"

"HI! Likeomgimsomadatronhessuchagit!"

"What did he do? Er…Now"

"He jumped and he had the broom right there and I thought he had fallen to his death cause he hid under the eves on the roof and I was so upset it's just not fair!"

"So, he faked his death and worried you to death?"

"Yes…after saying 'I can't fly now I'm a dad!'"

"Why did he say he's a dad?"

"Well, I knew he was tired so I came up with something so crazy it seemed sane to him. And it was 'Ron I'm pregnant with a green and blue puppy, and it is yours'"

"Oh goodness."

"Yup"

"He tried to kill himself once he found out he was a dad."

And end. I thought that was a good ending. Harry having a blond moment.


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor, Romance