Final Fantasy VII Late Nights and Power Outages

Note of the Authoress: My first FFVII fic! Enjoy! Oh, I revived some of the characters, just to let you know.

Disclaimer: I don't own them, Squaresoft does. But someday…

Late Nights and Power Outages

A multitude of clocks suddenly chimed 2:30. AM.

The paperwork had been piling up lately, as paperwork tends to do. The day before, Rufus had finally become fed up with how far behind schedule Shin-Ra Inc. had been falling in the matter of paperwork. He, of course, directed this matter to Tseng in a hostile and threatening manner.

That was why all of the Turks could be found in their respective offices at 2:30 AM, more or less working on filling out various forms. Rufus was in his office as well, pondering at the moment why his life had become so monotonous and incredibly boring. "I need a vacation!" he stated to himself, but that's another story.

Anyway, Tseng decided to take a short break and get another cup of coffee. He had already consumed far more coffee in that night than was healthy, but it managed to keep him awake. Which was more than could be said for some of the others.

As Tseng walked unsteadily towards the coffee machine at the end of the hallway, he could hear clamorous snoring erupting from Elena's office. The leader of the Turks continued towards his coffee, promising himself that he'd wake Elena on the way back to his own office. In passing Reno's office, Tseng was surprised to find that there was no sound of heavy breathing. Amazing, the redhead had managed to stay awake despite the monotonous task, and despite his reputation for finding ways to get out of work.

There was no snoring coming from Rude's office either, but Tseng wasn't too surprised at that. The man was always so quiet when awake, it figures that he would sleep silently, as well.

Upon stumbling up to the all-important coffee machine, Tseng discovered the reason why he had not heard Reno when he passed by the younger man's office. The redhead was curled up in a comfortable-looking position on the hard marble floor beneath the table that held the steaming pot of black caffeine.

Tseng laughed inwardly. '_He looks so innocent when he's asleep,'_ the raven-haired man concluded, before nudging Reno with his foot to wake him.

"Stop kicking me, Rufus, I filed that paper yesterday…" Reno mumbled in his sleep, barely audible.

"Suit yourself," Tseng murmured softly. He had another more interesting plan to wake his co-worker. As if nothing was at all amiss, he filled a Styrofoam cup to its limit with coffee and took a sip. It burned his tongue quite painfully, but Tseng's senses were dull enough right now with exhaustion that he was able to ignore the antagonistic sensation. Maybe not as accidentally as Tseng would have liked others to believe, the hand that held his coffee suddenly convulsed, spilling some of the hot black liquid on the sleeping—.

"YEEEEOOOOOOOCH!!!!! Curse you, Rufus, be more careful!!!"

No longer sleeping.

"You…huh? Tseng? What're you doing here? Damn, my head feels like it's burning…" his hand quested to the back of his head, where thick red hair was plastered to his scalp by a certain dark liquid. "Ouch! Tseng?!" he looked up at his superior with disbelief. "WHAT'D YOU DO?! MY HEAD'S BLEEDING!!!"

"Relax, I _accidentally_ spilled a small amount of coffee. You aren't bleeding." Tseng was struggling hard to keep a straight face. Late nights, caffeine, and too much paperwork definitely had a peculiar effect on the normally calm and serious Turk leader.

Reno looked about to do something excessive and violent to his superior, but realized that he didn't have a weapon with him. Instead, he just ran off to the nearest men's room to wash the coffee from his hair. On his way, Reno passed a dazed and tired-looking Rufus, who asked, "did somebody call me? I could swear I heard someone say my name…"

Elena was dreaming happily. She was riding a chocobo over fields of flowers in the bright morning sunlight, and later would be heading off to Costa Del Sol for a nice, long vacation. The Chocobo turned its head and nudged her. "Elena? Elena!"

"Hey, you can't talk!" she responded in disbelief.

Tseng stood over Elena, poking her shoulder gently with his pen. "Elena, wake up!"

"Shut up," she mumbled in response. "You're just a stupid Chocobo."

Tseng was surprised and a bit angry at the rebellious response. He didn't tolerate insubordination. Pulling out Reno's electro-mag rod, which he had confiscated the day before, Tseng set the power on low and zapped Elena into reality.

"Hey!" she cried out, sleep and dreams vanishing immediately. "What was that for?!"

"I will not tolerate defiance, and sleeping on the job is unacceptable, as well." Tseng calmly walked out of the door, ignoring Elena's questions and protests.

Once outside his employee's office, Tseng sighed and started back towards his own workspace, cup of coffee in hand. He sighed again; as much as he tried to hide it, Tseng hated all the paperwork Rufus made him do.

As he opened the door to his office, Tseng could hear the snoring start back up in Elena's office. He decided, however, to give it up as a lost effort. There was absolutely no way his Turks were going to stay awake through the night…

Upon entering his office, Tseng suddenly let out an uncharacteristic yelp. A very disheveled and disoriented Rufus was sitting in his chair, rummaging through his desk drawers. 

As though he didn't even notice Tseng standing there staring at him, the president of Shinra Inc. continued to search through his desk, convinced that he had put his hair gel around here somewhere…

"Sir?" Tseng asked cautiously.

Rufus looked up in annoyance. There, by the door, was his second-in-command. "What do you want, Tseng?"

"Want, Sir?" The raven-haired man questioned, "Is there a reason you're going through my desk?"

"What are you talking about, Tseng? Go back to your office and get working. I don't pay you for nothing, you know."

"But Sir, _this_ is my office."

Suddenly, the lights flared and sparked, and then all went out at once, leaving everyone in total darkness. Two very feminine screams sounded from somewhere down the hallway. The power had gone out.

Rufus was suddenly pulled out of his daze, and wondered why he was sitting in Tseng's office, rather than his own. Even though no one could see, he flipped his hair back into place in that arrogant way of his, and quickly followed Tseng out the door. Or, rather, what he thought was the door, but was in actuality a very solid wall.

Tseng, feeling his way along the walls in search of the Turk lounge, heard a loud ***_THUMP_*** come from somewhere behind him. Oh well, there was nothing he could do but hope that there was a flashlight in the lounge somewhere.

It would seem that Elena and Rude had gotten the same idea as Tseng. Upon his arrival to the lounge, the door was already open and his adjusted eyes could make out two vague figures searching the cabinets and drawers for a source of light.

"Check that drawer over there again, Rude," Elena directed.

"Where?"

"Over there! Where I'm pointing!…oh, sorry." She realized that no one could see her pointing, and was glad that they couldn't see her face flush as she realized her mistake. "Over by the door, in that desk," she corrected herself.

"…" Said Rude, even though that's not saying anything. He started walking in the general direction of the door

"Oof!" Rufus, who had finally caught up, walked straight into Tseng's back, causing the older man to topple forward into the lounge, arms waving wildly.

Rude, searching for the flashlight, tripped over Tseng's outstretched arm and fell beside him on the floor. 

Reno chose that moment to return from the men's room, and smacked into Rufus. The two tumbled into the fray.

Elena continued her search, oblivious to the tangled mess of Shin-Ra members on the floor. "You guys, I think I found a flashlight! Hey," she flipped the switch, "…it's out of batteries…"

"Check the cabinet above the microwave," Tseng suggested as he pulled himself not so gently from the pile.

"Ack, gerff, 'Seng yer sandig un 'y 'air! (Ack, get off, Tseng you're standing on my hair!)" shouted Rufus. "Reho, het yor 'ingersh ou' o' 'y 'outh or I ser I'r fite 'em! (Reno, get your fingers out of my mouth or I swear I'll bite them!)"

"Get your mouth away from my fingers, worthless sadistic prez!" Reno retorted viciously without thinking. 

Fortunately for Reno, Rufus had not been listening at the moment he said that. Instead, Shin-Ra's president had managed to untangle himself from his employees and was sitting cross-legged on the floor, focused intensely on attempting to reform his mangled hair that Tseng had stepped on. 

Reno crawled over onto the couch and stretched out across it, ignoring Tseng's protests as he got pushed back to the floor. The older man stood up and smoothed his clothes hastily. Calmly, he stepped up to where he guessed the redhead would be and grabbed for Reno's shirt collar, hoping to pull his co-worker off the couch and regain his spot.

"Ouch! That's my nose! What the—" Reno and Tseng quickly engaged in a catfight over the couch.

A feminine voice was heard from across the room. "Aha! I found the batteries! Now where did I set that flashlight?…"

"…" said Rude with amusement.

Rufus, still messing with his hair, was seriously beginning to doubt Shin-Ra's hiring policies.

Reno, still perturbed about the coffee incident, managed to shove Tseng into a wall. While the older man stumbled around trying to find his opponent, Reno took the opportunity to steal the couch back.

"Here it is!" stated Elena, after finally locating the flashlight. She began to push the batteries into their slot, feeling the ends of them to figure out which direction they went in. Then, a sudden _THUMP_ was heard as Tseng stumbled into her. "Sorry," he mumbled guiltily as the flashlight and batteries rolled away across the floor in opposite directions.

Elena fumed. "Tseng, you—!"

"Me what?"

"You—you…should help me look for the flashlight and batteries?"

"Sure." Tseng smirked in the darkness. He loved inspiring fear in others.

"Ouch!" Reno yelped as Rufus tried to sit down on the couch. "Get off me!"

"Move over! There's room for more than just one person, you know."

"I don't feel like it. Get off me!"

"As your superior, I command you to move!"

*Grrroooowl*

Elena jerked her head towards the sound. "Reno, is that you? That sounded really authentic…you do have a talent, after all!"

"Thanks a lot," he replied sarcastically, "but that wasn't me."

*Hissssssssssss*

"Then, who was it? Tseng?"

"No…"

"Rufus?"

"You insult me!"

"Rude?"

*Snarl*

"…No…"

"I know!" stated Reno conclusively, "I saw Hojo sneaking in here a few days ago. It's probably one of his experiments."

"Sounds like it's coming nearer," Elena noted with a panicked tone in her voice.

"Just great," Rufus commented derisively. "The power's out, it's nearly 3:00 in the morning, and I'm stuck in a room with four messed-up, insubordinate employees and a ferocious test subject. I said I wanted my life to be more exciting, but not like _this_!"

Reno took the blond president's momentary lack of concentration as an opportunity to kick him off the couch.

Tseng, standing as silently as possible, heard soft breathing and the nearly inaudible click of claws walking towards him. Elena whimpered softly and moved closer to him. In fact, she was already pressed tightly against his side and was clutching his sleeve fervently. Suddenly, soft breathing became a rasping snarl as the 'experiment' leapt for the kill. A heavy, catlike but furless body collided with Elena and pushed her to the ground. Jaws laden with sharp, yellowed teeth opened and Elena felt hot breath against her throat. Then…

*Zaaaaaaaaaaapppppppp*

Tseng had pulled out Reno's confiscated electro-mag rod just in time. The charred test subject fell heavily to the ground. In one frantic movement, Elena pushed the thing away from herself, jumped to her feet, and ran to the opposite side of the room, shivering and gasping.

In the light of the electro-mag rod, Tseng could see the others around the room watching him. Reno and Rufus were on the floor by the couch, clinging to one another with frozen looks of terror. Rude calmly walked over to comfort Elena, who was now pressed tightly against the wall.

"Wait a moment," Rufus commented, looking at the source of light, "Tseng, you had that thing the whole time?"

"You mean all that searching for a flashlight and batteries was a waste of time?!" Elena added.

"Heh, heh, I forgot about it…"

Tseng was spared further embarrassment as Rufus and Reno suddenly noticed their…attachment. Later, after many rounds of "Get away from me!" and "No! _You_ get away from _me!_", peace was finally restored (well, partially restored…), and everyone went back to their own office to sleep, er…work.

The next morning, a sudden deafening wail could be heard from the Turk lounge following Hojo sneaking in to check on his specimen. Five people throughout the building smirked as one.

Please, please review! I really appreciate constructive criticism, but anything is fine! ^_^ Arigatou!

~Secera~


End file.

Final Fantasy VII, Humor