Harry Potter 1. The Beginning of the End

Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before - it takes something from him.  
**Louis L'Amour**

**!#$%^**

Everyone was staring at us in awe. Me and Harry Potter. Well, we I suppose _were _quite a sight. Potter stood about six feet away from me with his wand drawn and a smirk in place. I was slowly standing up from my seat at the Slytherin table, drawing my own wand, and in the process; devising a slow and painful death for the-Boy-Who-Lived. Nobody has ever dared to start a duel in the Great Hall. At least not while the professors were present. But he had said something. Something that got me mad, and Slytherins were just _not_ that good at letting things go. The room had hushed as I stood, and I knew that the professors were deciding whether or not they should intervene. I hoped they didn't.

"What did you say?" I hissed, my voice full of venom and steel. Potter was just about to learn just how dangerous I could be, and let's just say..._not _a good thing for him. But he just smirked his infuriating smirk. He probably thinks he can get away with it; and with the teachers he can. Except for Snape. He's the only one who sees him for what he is. So I smirked back at him.

"Stupify!" He was too surprised at my sudden boldness to defend himself, and was knocked flat to the ground. But before I let him get up, I ran over to him and pinned him down. Now I probably shouldn't have done this next thing, but as "The Ice Queen", I had a reputation to uphold.

"Next time use that inflated head of yours and think before you come over and insult my family like that. Because _no one_ insults my family. Especially you, Potter." And with that I punched him squarely in the nose. Before I could fully enjoy the crunch that sounded when my fist hit his nose and the blood that squirted out, he cursed me back into the Ravenclaw table.

Girls screamed as s they scrambled away from the mass destruction we were creating. I was covered in pumpkin juice, and the crumbs of several different kinds of pastries were scattered all over my robes, but I didn't care. Gave me another reason to knock some sense into him. Potter was definitely _**NOT **_getting away with this. So I used his "signature" move.

"Expelliarmus!" He was expecting it this time, though, and blocked it. It was sooo on.

"Immobulus!"

"Petrificus Totalus!"

"Rictusempra!"

"Serpens-"

I had barely said half of the curse when both of our wands went flying out of our hands and we were frozen in place. Professor McGonagall had stopped the fight. God damn.

"Miss Manston! Mister Potter!" She barked. She looked disappointed in Potter, and I swear she rolled her eyes when she looked at me.

"Headmaster Dumbledore's office. NOW!" As we were released from the spell that binded us, I glanced up to where the teachers were sitting; only to find Dumbledore smiling at me with his bloody blue twinkling eyes.

**!#$%^**

Okay, before I continue on with that _dreadfully_ moving story about myself, you should probably know my name and what-not. My name is Atarah Manston, and I'm a fifth year Slytherin pureblood. As you can probably tell, Potter is _definitely_ not my one off my best friends right at this moment. Damn; I hate him! Anyways, I have blonde hair, light green eyes, and blah blah blah. That's not really the important stuff right now.

Draco Malfoy is (and has been) my best friend for many long years. Our families are very close; so you can imagine how close my family is to Voldemort. Yep. It's my mother's _dream _to see me grow up to be a Death Eater, just like my bloody father. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm loyal to my family (who in turn is loyal to Voldemort), but I don't worship the bloody guy. He's just some spoiled power crazy murderer who'll do anything to get his way, and stomp his feet when he doesn't. Oh, how my family would hurt me if they heard me say that. I can already feel the Crucio coming on. Ha! I'm a bit of a rebel, but I'm not stupid enough to get myself killed.

**!#$%^**

I walked to Dumbledore's office cold, wet, and covered in pumpkin juice. The trip was made in silence, but both Potter and I sent murderous glares towards each other. We probably would have started something again if it weren't for professor McGonagall; who was trailing quietly behind us. I still can't believe that Potter had the nerve to insult my family. I don't actually know why he came over to the Slytherin table, but he started threatening Draco; saying something about leaving his friends alone (probably that Neville kid, who we had bullied earlier that day). Anyways, I automatically jumped to Draco's defense, and Potter insulted me. You know the rest.

"Why do you have to be such an insufferable know-it-all? You and your little fan club_?" _I whispered angrily to him, careful not to let McGonagall overhear.

"Why do _you_ have to be such a selfish little princess? Getting everything you want, at the bat of an eyelash?" He returned.

"Ha! _Me_? _You're_ the famous one. You've got everyone wrapped around your bloody finger!"

"You think I_ wanted _this? I _wanted _ to have Voldemort continuously try to kill me? To have Voldemort kill my _parents_? " He whispered louder.

"Well, it was their fault for trusting the wrong person." I muttered with a roll of my eye. He stopped walking and turned to face me. He held his wand to my throat, and had a look in his eyes that, well, it was...murderous. It was a look that I knew all too well from my father.

"Potter!" McGonagall pulled him away from me.

"DON'T YOU _DARE_ TALK LIKE THAT ABOUT MY PARENTS!" He was struggling against McGonagall, staring me straight in the eye with that look (that quite honestly scared me). I couldn't help myself from what I did next. Childish, I know.

"Well, it's the truth, I don't exactly lie about that sort of thing, Potter! Grow up for once! Things aren't just about YOU anymore! And you call _me_ selfish! HUNDREDS OF OTHERS ARE LOSING THEIR LIVES AND ALL YOU CAN THINK OF ARE YOUR _TWO _ BLOODY PARENTS?"

"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT LOSING SOMEONE YOU LOVE! YOU HEARTLESS, EVIL, FILTHY DEATH EATER!" He was shouting so loud, I was sure that the Great Hall could hear him. I was positive actually. We weren't that far from where everyone was sitting, and now; listening to our screaming. But that last thing he said, it struck home. It ripped open a wound I thought was long since healed, and released something inside of me that hasn't been introduced to the world before. I screamed and threw myself at him, pushing professor McGonagall out of the way.

"_YOU_ DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE!" I screamed, pushing him, and shoving him, and trying to get it into his head that he's not the only one who's been through _hell_ before. " YOU'RE SO INNOCENT, POTTER! WHY CAN'T YOU OPEN YOUR EYES FOR ONCE! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE!"

I live with parents that slap me at even the slightest mistake I make. I have to be around people that would kill an innocent child without blinking; and would be able to sleep perfectly at night afterwards. I had to be a puppet in everyone's else's master plan, not being able to do anything for myself. He didn't understand what it was like. For years and years, rage and sorrow had been boiling up inside of me, and I was letting it out all right now; on him. I would have normally felt sorry for him, but all that went through my head at that moment was,_ "Why does no one understand?"_

He had been through his fair share of hardships, I'll give him that, but what I wouldn't do to trade lives with him now.

And with a final shake, I let go of Potter's shoulders and started to cry. I haven't cried since I was five and my mother hit me for the first time. I was sobbing uncontrollably. I fell to the floor in a troubled heap of useless limbs. I don't know how, but he destroyed me. Potter didn't say anything, just stared at me with a look of complete and utter shock. I mean, what would happen if your worst enemy broke down in tears in front of you, for no apparent reason?

"Expel me if you want." I spoke towards McGonagall, my voice now completely barren of all emotion. I had stopped crying; stopped the rivers that had flowed freely down my face just seconds ago. I stood and started to walk to Dumbledore's office, alone and lifeless. McGonagall was too shocked to move, same as Potter. I laughed humorlessly.

Somehow, he managed to crack my heart of ice. The Ice Queen. That's what they call me. And I earned it, by being as ruthless as I was. I could slice down anyone in my way, and I showed that by attacking Potter. Unfortunately, I supposed I lost that title the second I started crying. A tired and lonely girl, stripped of the one thing she holds to.

I could hear their footsteps start to follow me again, and this time, there was complete silence. No sounds could be heard from the direction of the Great Hall, either.

My name is Atarah Manston, and this is the beginning of a long story; one of love, life, and of course, death. This is the story of my fight for freedom in a world that was out to get me.


	2. Apologies and New Beginnings

"This is the most devastating feeling that I have ever felt. It's just an emptiness inside of you, a void that can't be healed."

**Brandon Worthy**

**!#$%^**

Only mere moments ago I was a cruel, deceiving, _ruthless_ Slytherin; with a heart of ice. Now? Ha! Now I was walking to my doom (getting expelled for attacking Harry Potter) with an empty heart. If I even had a heart. I never believed anyone when they said to let out your anger; or it will build up and eventually blow up in your bloody face. Now I know better. Years of rage and hurt destroyed me. Potter destroyed me. He pushed me off my edge; which I was already dangerously close to.

As Dumbledore's office neared, I stepped to the side and let McGonagall lead us in.

"Fizzing Whizbee."

I momentarily snapped out of my slow zombie-ish **(A/N- I had to put zombie-ish in there. Sorry if it annoys ya!) **trance. Fizzing Whizbee? Who puts Fizzing Whizbee as a password? I shook my head. I have never been up here before, and thank Merlin's. Whenever anyone goes to the headmaster's; it usually means they're getting expelled. For instance: me. I've been to Snape's office down in the dungeons before, usually to discuss...well, I suppose you should know something right now. Snape is my sort of/unofficial father. He _was_ going to be my godfather; seeing as my parents wanted someone who was close to the dark lord, but they found someone better. Voldemort himself.

Yep.

Just bloody _grand_ isn't it?

"Miss Manston. Miss Manston!" I lifted my gaze from my juice covered shoes to find both McGonagall and Potter waiting for me.

"Oh." I quickly climbed up the steep steps to Dumbledore's office. I hate bloody stairs. Let me say that now. I _hate_ them. You'd think that I'd have gotten used to it, seeing as most of Hogwarts is made of them. Once I reached the top, I rushed over to the door; wanting to get this over with. I opened the door to a room I wasn't expecting. It was cozy. _Cozy_. There were portraits all over the walls, of the previous headmasters: I believe. A laugh drew my eyes to the desk where Dumbledore sat; smiling at me.

"You're the only student I've had that hasn't knocked before bursting in."

I froze. I couldn't tell if he was mad at me or was just joking. He waved his hand at one of the chairs that were positioned in front of his desk, and I quickly sat down. McGonagall lead Potter to the other. There was a moment of awkward silence that no one was brave enough to break. Well, me and Potter weren't. Dumbledore just smiled at us.

Finally McGonagall cleared her throat.

"Headmaster?" She too, clearly felt uncomfortable in the pregnant silence.

"Ah, yes. What to do?" He mused; still not looking away from me and Harry. A knock at the door caught his attention, and he finally looked up.

"Come in." Snape walked in and I could feel my spirits lift. He walked briskly to my chair. The situation was comical. Harry sat in the chair opposite me with McGonagall standing behind him, and Snape mirrored her. Gryffindor on one side and Slytherin on the other. Dumbledore was in the middle. I stifled a laugh; but it felt good to be _able_ to laugh. I was getting myself back.

"Professor Snape, what do you believe their punishment should be?" And without hesitation (as I knew he would), he answered.

"We all saw how Potter went to the Slytherin table and provoked Miss Manston. He drew his wand before her, as well. She defended herself." I rolled my eyes. Of course. Potter opened his mouth as if to say something in his defense, but stopped as McGonagall shook her head. Dumbledore was still smiling like it was a bloody party.

"Professor McGonagall?" He asked; clearly enjoying this.

"Miss Manston should have had more restraint. She shot off the first spell, as well as attacking Mister Potter afterwards."

Oh come on! This was not _all _my fault! I began to stand, but Snape pushed me back down.

"I see. Well, it looks to me as if it was _both_ of their faults. May I suggest detention? Yes, that sounds about right. A month of detention with each other."

"What?" Both me and Potter had shot out of our chairs.

"Together?" I asked. I was fine with detention, happy even, but with _him_? I shot a look at Potter that made him very aware where I stood on this situation.

"Yes Miss Manston. Together." Bloody hell. "With Hagrid. He can decide where. You are dismissed." Hagrid? I slowly stood and started to walk out after everyone else.

"Atarah? May I talk to you for a minute?" Crap. I turned back around and sat down once again.

"I know about what happened with Harry." What part? There was the one where I wanted to rip his heart out, the part where he scared me with his evil-eyes, and the part where he made me burst into tears.

"Is there something you want to tell me?" Oh, believe me, it was tempting. I had a feeling that he wouldn't tell anyone. I could tell him everything without the risk of being judged. Maybe I could tell him just a little...

"How much do you already know?" That was what _I_ needed to know.

" I know about your parents. And I know about your godfather."

I froze once again. He knew about Voldemort? How come he still let me inside of his school? For all he knew; I could be a spy!

"I know that it's not your fault. And that you don't want what your mother wants. I'm offering you protection."

Protection? This could solve all of my problems! I could be away from my abusive parents, away from Voldemort, away from...

"How?"

"Simple. The order will look after you. You won't go home. But of course, there is one thing you must understand. Once you accept my protection, you cannot go back. They will brand you as a traitor."

My blood went cold and I was sure my face was pale. Would it be worth it? Could I really betray my family? What about Draco? Would I be betraying him?

"I-I-I" I cleared my throat nervously. "I'll have to think about it." And with that I took off; I ran out of his office and down the stairs, and I would have ran down the hallway had I not ran into someone. I knocked us both to the floor. I could feel my eyes burning with tears, so I just lay on the floor motionlessly.

"Um, are you okay?" I opened my eyes at the sound of his voice. It was Potter. I nodded my head; I was too tired and confused to fight with him right now. He looked nervous, probably because the last time I talked to him I broke his nose. Someone must have fixed it, because it had stopped bleeding, I noticed.

He offered his hand, and I took it. I quickly wiped the tears from my eyes, before he could see and tell this to all his little fans.

"Um, I kind of, I...um." He tried to talk, and I laughed. It was pretty funny to see the Boy-Who-Lived stumbling over what to say. He stared at me with his emerald green eyes, and I suddenly grew self-conscious.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, um...nothing. So, um, I kind of wanted to, um...apologize. For earlier." It was my turn to stare. He was apologizing? Really?

"Oh. Thank you..." This was kind of weird. "This is the first semi-civil conversation we've had. Last one we had resulted in your broken nose." I joked. Merlin, I was really losing my "Ice Queen" title. I was talking normally to my sworn enemy. What has the world come to?

"Yeah. Good punch by the way. It bloody hurt." He returned with a joke of his own. I smiled. I opened my mouth to say something else, but I didn't get a chance before someone called out to me.

"Tara?" I realized who it was by my nickname. It was Draco. His eyes were kind when they looked at me, but when he saw who it was I stood next to, they immediately hardened.

"Potter." He spat. He moved next to me and gently took my arm.

"Why don't you go off to your little mudblood and redheaded weasel? Leave the grownups alone to talk?" Harry scowled and was about to retort but I cut him off.

"Draco, leave it. He's not worth it. Let's go." I sent an apologetic look towards Harry, letting him know I didn't _really_ mean it. I half smiled at him and ragged Draco off in the direction of the Slytherin common room.

"So, what happened? The people in the Great Hall could hear most of it. You know, all the screaming about parents and not understanding and such." I winced.

"Yep." He smirked.

"Yep? Is that all you're going to say?"

"Yep."

"Of course." He rolled his eyes. "But seriously? What happened after that? It got dead silent." I was conflicted. Should I tell him about the crying? I had my answer before I even asked the question. Draco was my best friend; I could tell him everything.

"Well; I kind of started crying." I admitted. I kept on walking like it was no big deal, but Draco stopped dead.

"_What?_ _You? CRYING?"_ He wasn't mad, just...shocked. I never cried.

"Yep." I started walking again. He caught up quickly.

"Huh. Wow...I guess you're not "The Ice Queen" anymore. "

I rolled my eyes. We could be _twins_ we were so alike. And so I told him everything. Everything except Dumbledore's offer. I was too tired for that, and I didn't know what to do; much less what Draco would think. Would he be upset? Would he agree with Dumbledore? I know that he's scared of Voldemort, but would he be okay with me betraying the bloody guy?

We soon got to the common room and he started to walk up the stairs to the boy's dormitories.

"Wait!" I shouted. I needed something. This'll sound really dumb, but I ran up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist. I needed a hug. There ya have it. Go ahead and laugh; but I really did need one.

He was shocked once again, but he hugged me back. It felt so good just to be wanted; I felt a single tear trail down my cheek. He pulled back, still holding on to me; but just so he could look at me. He smiled sadly and wiped the sign of weakness away. I don't know how many minutes we spent hugging; but it was nice.

"You need to get some sleep. You've got to have a headache from all that crying." He joked. I elbowed him softly. He laughed and kissed me gently on the forehead. I smiled. Thank Merlin for best friends.

I stepped away and waved.

"Night Draco."

"Night 'Tara."

And after that, I slept peacefully up in my room; at least until my nightmare.

**!#$%^**

I was in my room at my house, and everything looked dark and foggy. I rubbed my eyes; hoping that it would make the shadows go away, but it had no effect. I looked around, trying to find something familiar about this strange room. I looked at the nightstand where my annoying alarm clock should have been; but it was nowhere in sight. In fact, nothing familiar was in sight.

"Atarah! Get down here! We have guests!" My mother's voice called up to me. It was distant, as if it was being said from a million miles away. I was scared, but I went down the two story staircase to the kitchen, where my mother stood; waiting for me. She scared me even more. She was...a shadow.

"There you are! Why the bloody hell weren't you down here sooner? Now go and entertain them!" She pushed me harshly into the dining room. There were more shadows there. I could faintly recognize them as some of the Death Eaters. I found one of the shadows...it was Draco!

"Draco!" I ran over to him; but he just sat there. I was confused. Why was he not listening to me? Was he mad at me? At that moment all of the Death Eaters and Draco looked up. They were looking at something behind me. I turned around to see Voldemort. He wasn't a shadow: I could see him _very_ clearly. His snake-like features and red eyes staring at me with venom.

"Atarah..." He spoke. "It's time for you to join us; to become one of us." He grabbed my left arm and held his wand to my bare skin.

"No!" I screamed. I tried to pull away, but it did no good. He was too strong.

"No! I'll never be one of you! Let me go! _DRACO!_ Help me, Draco!" But his shadow just watched cruelly as Voldemort branded the dark mark onto my arm.

"Why, Draco? _Why?_" I cried.

"Tara..." He whispered.

**!#$%^**

"Tara..." I was being shook.

"Tara!" I opened my eyes to find Draco shaking me awake. Draco...he wasn't a shadow!

"Draco! You're not...you're not a shadow!" I embraced him. Thank Merlin...thank Merlin. It was just a dream. I'd never had a nightmare that intense before. That...that was my worst fear; becoming one of them. I guess my dream reflected that.

"Umm...yeah. I'd hope not. My pretty face is too wonderful to be a dark, lonely shadow." He smirked. I laughed. The only thing that could go through my head right now was, "Thank Merlin, thank Merlin." Over and over again.

"So...you going to tell me what that was all about?" He asked. I sighed and nodded. Wait...

"How are you in the girl's dormitories?" It stumped me. He raised an eyebrow at my puzzled expression, but answered.

"Pansy saw that you were having a nightmare. Said you were screaming. She went and got me. Well, she sent a boy to go get me, but...yeah." Pansy, oh wow. Well, she probably wanted to get in good with Draco. I can't imagine another reason she would be nice to me. It was just then that I noticed he didn't have a shirt on.

I've seen him shirtless before, but it still makes me blush. He was wearing loose green pants as well. He looked pretty nice; better than nice. Then something clicked in my head.

"What time is it?" He laughed.

"It's four in the morning. You'd better tell me about this nightmare. I'd be very angry if I had to get up in the middle of the night for nothing." Opps. The room was empty...

"How many other people did I wake up?" I winced.

"Oh, just all of the girls and about half of the guys. Not that bad." Ouch. I'd be getting some glares at breakfast, I could just feel it.

"It's not _that_ bad. Most of them understand. _Most_ of them." I groaned, and sat up. "Okay, well...here goes." I told him everything about the dream. About Voldemort, about the dark mark, and even about how he ignored me as I called out to him. It felt nice to get it off my chest. And I'm sure had I ignored the dream it would keep building and there'd be another explosion.

Draco had a dark expression on his face; one that I knew all too well. No...

"Draco, don't..."  
"It's my fault you were upset, wasn't it? In your dream? You said to help but I just stared. It's all my fault."

I couldn't help myself. I started laughing. Laughing like a madwoman. I couldn't breathe, and Draco sat there and had an expression that made me laugh harder.

"Draco you-you can't actually -be-lieve that it was _your_ fault? It was a _dream_! A dream for Merlin's sake! You had no control over it! If I had to blame someone; it would be my subconscious!" I gasped in between fits of girlish giggles.

He rolled his eyes and helped me get out of bed.

"Well, as lovely as this is; I've got to get dressed. So do you." I was confused, it was four in the morning! I looked at the clock at the side of my bed and laughed. It was six. We've been talking for around two hours. Great. So I got up and dressed in my usual robes, then went down for breakfast.

As I got to the bottom of the stairs, everyone looked up at me. Draco was waiting on a nearby couch, and was talking to Blaise Zabini. I quickly walked over to him and sat down.

"Are you okay, Atarah? You gave us all a bloody scare this morning." Blaise asked. I smiled at him and nodded. It was good to see that some people don't hate me for waking them up at the crack of dawn. Before dawn, really. Blaise smiled back at me and continued talking to Draco.

"Um, guys? I'm going to go eat now."

Draco raised his eyebrows, but nodded.

"I'll go with you." He stood, but I shook my head.

"No, it's okay. I'll be fine by myself." I got up from the soft black couch and set off. I kept thinking about my nightmare. It was horrible. And what was with the shadows? What scared me most of all was Draco; how he ignored me when I was begging him to help me.

I shivered, and not because I was cold. I finally arrived at the Great Hall. I took a deep breath, and walked in. Of course; everyone was looking at me. But one particular person caught my eye. Harry Potter.

**A/N: Hey guys, let me know what you think. I know, I know; there's no figurative language in this one. But I have a right to exclude figurative language from fanfics when I'm sick. That sentence made no sense! Sooo yeah; I'm REAALLLLYYY sick right now. Hack Hack. I'm killing my lungs: got good. Grrrr...one thing about my writing is I use this too much -;;;;;;;;;-not good.! So what do you think about Harry being all nice in this chapter. Atarah's nice too! Don't worry; that won't last for long. There's going to be another "fight" between them. And what do you think of Draco? Well, let me know!**


	3. Speaking Out

I stared back at the-Boy-Who-Lived. After several seconds I looked away and lifted my head. I quickly sat down in my reserved seat. Yes, yes. I know. I have a reserved seat. Well, sometimes it pays to be me! Ha, ha...All the Slytherins were gazing at me with complete awe. Several of the higher ups and seventh years patted me on the back. Apparently I was a legend. If they only knew what happened _after_ I attacked Potter...well! At least for now they don't; and I plan on keeping it that way.

And so I sat there for quite a long time. Eventually I finished eating but class was nowhere near close to starting. So I got up and went to a safe place. The library. I know it's nerdy; but I love to read. It's an escape for me. Another thing I'd like to keep from the other Slytherins.

I was wrapped up in my own thoughts. Potter was...well, not Potter. He showed a side of him that I've never seen before. And it confused me. He still annoyed me, but he was different than usual.

"Manston! 'Oi!" A voice yelled angrily at me.

I turned around to see Weasley running towards me. Weasley? Granger was behind him; trying to catch up with him.

"Ron, no!" She pleaded. But he just kept coming towards me with a look of rage on his face. What's with people and angry looks? First Potter and now Weasley? I stopped walking and let him come to me.

"What's the matter Weasel? Finally looked in the mirror? Ouch, that must have been depressing. Sorry; maybe you should see someone about that." Okay, it wasn't my best insult but, hey! I was confused! He didn't even acknowledge my rude remark as he walked up to me. He was only a few inches away and was MAD.

"What's up, Reddy?" I was actually nervous inside. He _towered_ over me. He was at least a foot taller!

"Who the _bloody hell _do you think you are?" I just smirked at him.

"Why, I'm the Ice Queen, didn't you know?" Just then Harry rushed around the corner.

"Ron! Give it a rest!" He tried pulling him away, but Weasley just ignored him. Hermione was standing a couple of feet away; pondering what to do.

"Oh, that's just _bloody_ brilliant! You're defending _her_ while I'm trying to defend _you_? That doesn't even make any sense!" He turned to look at his best friend.

"Guys, stop it! You're going to get into trouble!" Granger tried to reason with Ron, with no success. He kept on glaring at me.

"Whatcha gonna do, Reddy?" I goaded him. Oh, this was fun! His nostrils flared as he tried to calm himself down.

"Why do you have to be such a self-centered little girl who cares only about her _bloody _image! Why don't you run off to your Death Eater family? Have Voldemort give you a hug?"

Ohhh. He. Was. Soo. Getting. It. I punched him. Except it wasn't Ron that I hit. It was Harry. What? He must have jumped in front of his best friend, seeing as Ron was on the floor. Bloody Potter. Always saving his little mates from danger.

"Oww, for Merlin's sake! That's twice you've punched me! That _bloody_ hurts!" Oh damn. I think I broke his nose again. I pulled his hand away from his face so I could get a better look. But Potter gave me a strange look.

"Well, it was your fault." I muttered. He just stared at me with his green eyes. I looked away quickly.

"Yep. Definitely broken. Again." I pulled out my wand and muttered a healing charm. Oh Merlin. I'm going soft. Help me, oh help me! I looked over at Granger, but she had a bewildered look on her face. She was looking back and forth between me and Harry so fast; her head was sure to go flying off her neck at any second. I glanced at Weasley and he was mirroring Granger's movements exactly. I groaned. It was nice not to be fighting with Potter for once, but I couldn't let rumors run wild.

I kicked his leg and he fell to the floor, with a look of hurt and confusion on his face. So I jinxed him. Red spots grew all over his face; and it wasn't a pretty sight.

"You should've let Weasley take the punch, Potter, although I must admit; it _was_ very satisfying punching you a second time. Along with cursing you. And tripping you. We should do it again sometime! Won't that be fun! Except, next time, try to fight back. It's getting kind of boring, beating you up." I smirked and skipped off to the first class of the day, Potions.

**!#$%^**

It was still very early, so of course I was the only one there. And for some it would be torture to be alone with Severus Snape. But for me, it was perfectly fine. But Snape being Snape: he was waiting for me with a raised eyebrow.

"You're lucky Dumbledore didn't expel you, Atarah." He said in his usual drawling voice. I rolled my eyes.

"Yep. But _you_ didn't exactly help; blaming everything on Harry." I sat down at my usual table. It was up front and center; where Draco and I like it. Attention, attention, yes I know.

"'Potter? Did you just call Potter, _Harry_?" Oh bloody hell. Ever since we had that civil conversation together; I'd been calling him Harry. _Bloody hell_. How was I going to explain this?

"Um, no?" I replied lamely. I mean, what else was I supposed to say? So I just looked at my hands. Snape sighed and started to write today's lesson on the blackboard. At least he didn't question me too much. I groaned and smacked my head against the cool wooden table. I wasn't looking forward to DADA today. God I hate that toad woman; Umbridge. Draco is a total suck up to her, but I let her know how I feel about the nonsense she teaches. Although she does seem to go after Ha-Potter more. I kind of felt sorry for him, when he was punished for saying Voldemort was back. Of course, I _knew_ Voldemort was back, but I didn't see the point of saying anything.

"Boo!"

I jumped at least five feet off of the ground. I whipped around ready to punch yet another person: only to find Draco laughing at me.

"Yo-you actually jumped out of your chair. _Jumped_!" He laughed. I rolled my eyes once again. I should have known. Should. Have. Known. I groaned again and shook my head. People were going to be flooding in pretty soon. We had Potions with the Gryffindors; and I've always thought that it was funny how often they put the two rival houses together. I mean, they've got to know that we don't exactly get along.

Eventually everyone filed into the classroom. Gryffindors were always the last ones in; they took as long as they could to walk down to the dungeons. But as class started, I noticed that Harr-Potter wasn't there. Probably had to go down to the Hospital Wing because of my jinx. Well, it was his fault.

"Tara?" Draco was trying to talk to me, I realized.

"Hm?" I looked at him.

"Are you okay? You had a weird look on your face just then." His grey eyes searched my green ones. He was such a good friend; too good for me. I sighed and looked up at the directions for today's lesson.

"Yep." I lied.

**!#$%^**

"So...Professor...are we reading out of that book again?" I taunted Umbridge in our DADA class. She was wearing her usual pink robes (doesn't she have any other color of clothes? I mean _really!_) and a sickeningly sweet smile.

"Of course. What else would you think? It would be useless to learn that silly nonsense others" She looked pointedly at Harry, who had showed up at the end of Potions. "think _fifteen_ year olds should know." Smile still in place, she started to walk to the front of the classroom.

"But-what would happen if I were to be attacked? Would I throw a _book_ at them? Read a couple of _sentences_ to them, and hope that the pen really is mightier than the sword?" I said, with a smile that matched hers. She blinked ferociously.

"Why, y-"

"Or, should I give them a _lecture_ about how no one is going to attack a fifteen year old; like you. Or an entire speech about how Voldemort _couldn't possibly_ be back, when he is; like you? Or be an impossibly thick, toad-like woman who spies on children, and refuses to open her eyes and see what is going on in the world; like you?" I doomed myself by saying that, but she had no idea how annoying she is. Her smile fell off of her face and she looked like she was ready to strangle me.

"Detention tonight, Miss Manston." She tried to say sweetly. I smirked at her.

"But, Professor; I already _have_ detention tonight. Didn't you know? I beat up Potter. Who, I might add, might have been able to defend himself if you actually taught us defense against the dark arts. It looks like you were wrong. Apparently _I _would attack an innocent fifteen year old. Opps! Sorry about that." I smirked. Draco was frozen next to me, and my smirk grew larger.

"You will serve detention with me before you go to your other detention." She stated simply. Oh, detention would soo be worth it. I glanced around the classroom. All of the Slytherins and even some of the Gryffindors were giving me looks of approval. Potter just looked confused.

"Okay, can't wait!" I winked at her. That was my mistake. She made a screech-like sound and her face grew as red as Weasel's hair.

"Out! OUT OF MY CLASSROOM!"

"Gladly." I stood and bowed low to the floor. And then swept out of the room in a way that I picked up from Snape.

**!#$%^**

I was sitting at a table in the library reading a new book on Potions when someone approached me. I immediately tensed, thinking of how bad this would look if someone saw _me_ reading a book. I looked up cautiously and saw Hermione Granger staring down at me. Granger? What? She sat down across from me, and for a few minutes she just sat there and stared.

"Yes, Granger? Can I help you with something?" I drawled. Her eyes widened in surprise.

"You didn't call me a Mudblood." She stated. I looked back down at my book.

"Why thank you, Caption Obvious." I muttered. Why was she here? She obviously wanted _something_. "How did you know I was here?"

"I've seen you reading here before. I went out on a limb and thought you'd be here. I was right." She said, still studying me. She'd seen me before? How come the whole school didn't know, then? She must've not told anyone. Wow...I didn't expect that.

"I _was_ serious before, Granger. Can I help you with something?" I asked, wanting to know why Miss Know It All would come searching for _me_.

"You already have."

And with that, she got up and left. Bloody hell, why does no one make sense anymore? I shook my head and got back to reading about the after effects of the Drought of the Living Dead.

**!#$%^**

**A/N- Okay, sorry for the short chapter, but I didn't feel like writing anymore. But I will try to get another chapter out later tonight or tomorrow. If I get enough reviews from this one, I will definitely get it out tonight. I'm so nice, I know. In this chapter there was a semi-fight between Atarah and Harry, but I don't think it was that bad. Don't you all hate Umbridge? I sure do! So, what do you think Hermione was doing? Review and tell me your thoughts!**


	4. Fights and a Rebellion

**A/N- Hey guys! Sorry for the wait, just had some family issues (and guy issues). I promise to get the next chapter out sooner. I also have a banner for the story up on my profile, which was made by LadyMalfoy at TDA ( for those of you who don't know). I just want to say thank you to all of you who are brave enough to review my story! You're pretty dang awesome! Special thanks to **_**Penseln**_**; who has been totally amazing and has reviewed every chapter so far! Thanks a lot guys, keep up the good work (and reviews)!**

**!#$%^**

The slow and painful walk to Umbridge's office gave me time to think over the confusing events of my life. First: Harry Potter was an insufferable, snobby, prat _most_ of the time, but can actually be tolerable in the others. Second: I'm not as heartless as I thought, seeing as I broke down crying in front of my worst enemy (I can still pack a punch, though). Third: Dumbledore offered me protection from my family. That was the most puzzling of them all. I wasn't even sure I _wanted_ protection! I mean; I don't know if I could betray my parents, even though they use me, but would it be worth it to get away from all of the killing? All the abuse? Would the Order be able to keep me safe? My parents had told me stories of the Order before. They said that Bellatrix had tortured Alice and Frank Longbottom to madness. I'd always felt a little sorry for that Neville kid, even if he _is_ an idiot.

I shook my head, and knocked on the door I had been standing in front of, hoping no one would answer. I knew there was no chance, but I still mentally groaned when I heard her too-sweet-to-be-real voice calling me in to her office of doom. When I had thought of the place where Umbridge holds detention, I had pictured something more like Snape's dungeons, with chains and blood spattered on the walls. But instead, I was greeted with a blinding color of pink that no one should _ever_ have to lay eyes on. There were glass portraits on the walls...of kittens. She. Had. Cats. On. Her. Walls. The mewed quietly as I stepped up to her desk, where she smiled at me dangerously. She obviously used the, "Kill-Your-Enemy-With-Kindness." technique. It worked.

"Please," She said as she put down her tea, "have a seat." She pointed to the chair in front of a smaller desk to the side of her own and I sat down quickly. There was several pieces of paper that indicated I would be writing lines. I hated lines almost as much as I hated stairs. There's no point, really. Teachers "want the message to sink in", but it does little to no good. I definitely wasn't going to listen to whatever nonsense she wants me to write.

"Can I have a quill?" I growled at her. If she was making me write lines, she was giving me a quill; at the very least. She picked up the quill that was resting on her desk and placed it down on mine. It was a deep mahogany color and looked very expensive. Maybe I could, "accidentally", break it. I smirked at the thought.

"I want you to write, 'I must not be a brat', for as many times as it takes." She smiled at me. Really? 'I must not be a brat' was what she wanted me to write? It was insulting, to say the least. Who was _she_ calling a brat? I shook my head and wrote the first of many sentences. I was on my second when the back of my left hand started to sting. Like usual, I ignored it; but it soon became too painful to bear. I winced and turned over my hand, only to see blood. Slowly, it was like someone was cutting into my hand the words; I must not be a brat were etched into my shaking limb.

I looked up, feeling alarmed, at Umbridge; but she was wearing a cruel smile. That snob! She was torturing me! She should be thrown into Azkaban with the Dementors! I was about to stand when I realized that that was what she wanted. She wanted me to come running to her; admitting failure in a war that she started when she first stepped foot into these halls. She played a dangerous game that it just so happens; I'm an expert at. I smirked and smiled like I was having a grand time, and got back to writing, blood dripping down the sides of my hand.

**!#$%^**

Two hours later, I finally stood and gave my bloody lines to Umbridge. I had filled many pages; far too many to count. Now I had to serve out even more detention with Hagrid. Hopefully the giant won't make me do more lines. Although, I am curious as to what his punishment is going to be. He's not going to go very hard on Ha-Potter, seeing as their mates; but what about me? I think that I scare the bloody man.

Before detention, I ran over to the common room to get a bandage for my hand. It took a while, but finally my wound was as clean as it could be. I quickly ran over to Hagrid's cabin, where I waited. He wasn't there yet, and neither was Potter, so I stood alone in the dark. I sighed, leaned against the cool rocky wall of his cabin, and let my eyes close. The fresh air was nice after being cooped up in that tiny pink office for so long.

I seemed to be doing a lot of thinking lately, but I suppose it's simply because I have a lot to think about. Mainly Dumbledore's offer. I may not fully support Voldemort, but I'm not exactly going to go out and scream into the night how awesome Harry Potter is. I'm not fully on their side; I have too many connections to the other. Speaking of, Christmas was coming up in just a few short months, and I would have to spend it with my family. I had no idea how that would work out, but I'll try my best, I guess. Mum would probably throw a party, like usual. Everyone who was anyone would be there, including the Minister. And the "after party", would most likely be a Death Eater meeting. Hurray for the holidays!

"'Arry? Is that you?" A gruff voice called out from the Forbidden Forest. Hagrid must have been doing something in there when he heard me. I didn't particularly want to talk to him, so I just continued leaning on the wall of his hut. When he came into sight, he had a huge smile on his face. It instantly faded once he saw me. I thought about making fun of him, but decided against it; seeing as I was already in trouble. So I just stayed silent and looked away.

"Oh."

I heard his dog bark when he opened the door to his little fort, and the mutt came sprinting out. It made a beeline towards me. Of course; me and _only_ me.

"Fang!" Hagrid yelled fearfully. He wasn't scared for me (why should he be?), but I realized; he was scared for his dog. He was worried that I would hurt him. Now, I may be a mean and cruel individual; but I would never hurt an innocent animal. Even if that innocent animal knocked me onto the ground and was slobbering all over me and my robes. I struggled but finally managed to get his tongue away from my face and got into a sitting position.

"Sit." I commanded. And he sat; just like that. I stood up slowly and patted his head cautiously, worried that he might have some sort of rabies and bight me. But he licked me excitedly, oblivious to Hagrid and now Potter, who were staring at me like I was some sort of freak.

"Lay." I commanded once again. And he dropped to the ground. I laughed quietly to myself. I kneeled down and petted his coat gently, he was a sweetie, and leaned his head against my knee. I stood up and he mirrored me.

"Shake." I hoped he would know what I meant. He lifted his right paw and put it on my awaiting hand; I smiled triumphantly at my success.

"Blimey. Even _I've_ never gotten' em to do that." I looked up to find that Hagrid was walking over to where I was standing with my hand on Fang's back. I cleared my throat and walked away from the dog who seemed to be attached to me. He simply trotted back over to my side. I laughed again. Then I realized that I was here for detention.

"So, Professor Hagrid, what are we doing for detention?" I asked nicely; purely good intentions, for once without a hint of sarcasm. He looked a little shocked, but quickly shook his head.

"Well, I figured you could go into the forest and check up on the Thestrals. Make sure they're okay, 'cause I haven't seen em in a bit. Jus' want to make sure." He said. Thestrals? What are Thestrals? I was guessing that they're some sort of magical creature, since Hagrid's so interested in them. I guess I find out soon.

"How far into the forest are they?" I asked only because it was getting dark out; and I don't know if it was such a good idea to be in the forest when it was pitch black.

"Well, I-I er, don't actually know-but I was hoping _you_ would figure that out." He said nervously. I rolled my eyes, because this was _exactly_ what he would do. I admit that some of his classes are interesting; but he is quite...forgetful.

"Alright then. I'm going to be setting off now, before Potter here can chicken out." I started to walk towards the dark and foggy forest, with Fang running loyally beside me. At least I have him. Who would have guessed that the gamekeeper's mutt would like _me_. I distantly heard Potter's footsteps behind me, and I turned around.

"Potter? What are Thestrals?" I was dying to know. Were they dangerous? Potter tilted his head curiously and opened his mouth.

"They're a rare breed of winged horses. They're quite helpful, but wizards think they're unlucky just because they're..."

"Different?" I guessed. I could relate with them.

"They can only be seen by people who've seen death." He added. Death? Then I would certainly see them.

"People are probably just jealous because they can't see them. Are they dangerous?"

"No, not really. Only if they're threatened." He said. We walked in silence for the next thirty minutes. I mean, what else was there to say? Hi! What's your plan to kill the man my parent's worship? I wonder what he would say to that...

"You were brave earlier. With Umbridge. She's not teaching us anything. Hermione was talking, well...she said that...you...well...you...inspired her." What the hell was he talking about? I inspired Granger? What?

"The way you stood up to Umbridge. She said that we need to be taught real defense against the dark arts. She was going to ask you, but she sent me to instead. She said that you made her realize the reality of our situation. We need to know how to defend ourselves. Someone has to teach us. She...ah...wants _me_ to. And she was wondering if you wanted to help." I stopped for the second time. Potter? Teaching us...how to defend ourselves? Me helping? _Me_?

"When and where?" I smiled. This could be awesome. Going against Umbridge's back...perfect. I wasn't doing it for Potter or Granger or Weasel. I was doing it for me. Selfish, I know. He sighed in relief.

"Good. Because, you're, actually...pretty good. In the duel, I mean." Good? A compliment? Interesting...

"Not doing it for you Potter. But when is it?" And for another hour we talked about plans for the new "class". I almost didn't notice when Potter stopped and pointed towards something to my left.

"Do you see them?" I turned around and saw black horse-like creatures. They were purely bone and had white pupil-less eyes that seemed to glow in the dark of the forest. They were definitely different. I was about to make a remark about their large wings, but stopped as I noticed that it would let Potter know I had seen death.

"No." I lied and tried to look as though I couldn't see anything. Potter had a disappointed look on his face, and I realized that he just wanted one more person that could believe him. I frowned.

"Oh. Well, they look fine." Harry started to walk back, but I stayed behind and looked down at Fang.

"Can you see them, boy?" I asked sadly. He barked just as sad in return. I'll take that as a yes.

"How sad..." I murmured quietly and walked after Harry.

**!#$%^**

Hagrid's detention wasn't so much as detention as free time. It was quite fun actually. I got to be the co-manager of our new, well, whatever it is. A rebellion? I guess it could be called that. I can't wait to smirk in Umbridge's face, even if she doesn't know what the heck is going on. I went straight to the common room, where Draco was waiting for me.

"'Tara! There you are!" He got up and walked over to where I stood, but stopped dead when he saw my hand.

"What happened?" He gently took my hand, but I pulled it away and shook my head. He didn't need to know about my lame scars.

"Nothing, Draco. I'm going to bed." I started to walk away, but he grabbed my arm and pulled me back to face him.

"Atarah Lily Serena Natalie Manston, what the _HELL_ happened to you hand!" I glared at him when he used my middle names. Oh, I had more, rest assured. My parents thought it would be "cool" for their daughter to have THREE BLOODY middle names that don't even go together! I mean, really...at least choose cool middle names, not; Lily, Serena, and Natalie!

"I said nothing, Draco. Now, I'm going to go to bloody bed! Let me go; that hurts, you prick!" I pulled away from him with a final tug. It broke my heart when I saw the hurt look on his face, but it scared me when he turned into his father. He was much more violent then. He wasn't my Draco anymore. He was a mini Death Eater, and that scared me.

"What the hell's wrong with _you_?" He whispered. I gasped in shock.

"What? Me? How can you say that!"  
"You're bloody different! That's how! Why won't you let me look at your hand? And _WHY THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT_? HEY, COME BACK HERE!" I had started backing away from him, when he lunged towards me. I screamed slightly and ran up the stairs to the dormitories, but only got a few steps before he grabbed my robes and pulled me to him. I was afraid of him, but I tried not to let him see the tears in my eyes.

"Why do you have to be so difficult! You're changing!" I shook my head slightly and tried to loosen his grip on my robes.

"You're the one who's changed, Malfoy." Tear's still burned my eyes as I saw his expression grow to rage.

"You-" But he was cut off as he was pulled away from me. I fell to the floor and looked up at the scene before me. Blaise Zabini was yelling at Draco.

"What the hell Draco! What's gotten into you?" He yelled. Draco's eyes softened as he looked at me, remorse was clearly evident. He shook his head, trying to rewind, trying to go back. My Draco was back. If only he would stay for good.

"I don't know." He whispered, voice cracking on the last word. He turned and ran out of the common room, with his blonde hair falling from the gel that was holding it. Blaise quickly rushed to my side and helped me up carefully.

"Are you okay, Atarah?" I nodded my head and let my eyes dry. I muttered a thanks to him, because without his help...I don't know that would have happened. Draco usually did this when he was under a lot of stress, a trait he inherited from his father. He would take it out on everyone else except him. Somehow I still loved him. He was still _Draco_. The boy who saved me from depression, who saved me from my parents, and saved me form all the hard times this cruel world threw at me. He was still my best friend. I gave Blaise a small hug and another thank you, and slipped up to my room.

I fell asleep, thinking about saying yes to Dumbledore's protection.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: What do you think? Have a different opinion on Draco after this? How about Harry? Atarah helping with the DA? Dumbledore's offer? Christmas w/ the Manstons'? Atarah's middle names? All of the above would be nice ;D R&R please, tell me what could be improved!**


	5. Dumbledore's Army

**A/N: So here's the next chapter; let me know what you think of everyone. Just to let you know, I may move the events of the actual book/movie around a little, but **_**not**_** much; I promise. I used a lot of quotes in this chapter, but just remember that they are not mine and never will be. Sadly. If you have any questions or comments don't be afraid to ask.**

I woke up scared. I didn't want to see Draco today, but seeing as today was a Saturday; I could probably avoid him. Besides, today was the meeting for the rebellion. We really need a new name. I sighed and threw on some clothes and rushed headed down for breakfast. Draco wasn't there, thank Merlin. Now, you're probably wondering what's wrong with me; last night I was defending Draco's behavior, and now I'm trying to avoid him. Well, even if I love him; it's best to let him cool down first. I don't exactly want a black eye.

I caught Potter's eye as I sat down at the Slytherin table and nodded slightly at him; he knew what it meant. I ate all of my food in record time and then rushed out of the Great Hall to Hogsmead. It was getting colder now that it was close to winter, and of course I forgot my coat. I was shivering and by the time I got to the Hog's Head, everyone else was there. There was about twenty or so people crammed into the small room, and there was an awkward silence. I leaned against the doorway and smirked at Granger, Weasley, and Potter; all who's mouths were wide open in shock and surprise. I guess they didn't expect me to come.

I slowly walked to the front of the room, and everyone's eyes bugged out of their heads.

"What's _she_ doing here?" A voice called form the back of the room. I sent a murderous glare towards the unknown person. Whoever they were; they're dead once I get my hands on them.

"I reckon she's here for the meeting." Another voice said simply. I looked over to find Luna Lovegood seated by the Weasley twins. Loony? Standing up for me? Hmmmm..that was certainly interesting.

"Yes. She is. And for a good reason too." Granger said bravely. She nodded at me to say something. Me? Say something to _them_? Ummm...

"Hi." My mind was trying to come up with something to say that actually sounded intelligent; something that didn't make me seem like a brain dead loser.

"Well, you all know why we're here." Come on! "We need a teacher. Someone other than that bloody toad-face. Someone who with experience against the dark arts; someone who can teach us how to _really_ defend ourselves." People were still staring at me in disgust, and others had skeptical looks.

"Why?" A boy called out in a _most_ annoying voice. I started towards him angrily when Weasel's voice beat me to it.

"_Why?_ Because You-Know-Who's back, you tosspot." He glared at the boy. For once, Weasel did something smart! How strange...

"Say's he." The boy nodded towards Harry. I mentally groaned. We should have known this would be a problem. People still didn't believe Harry about Voldemort, and that could be a major disadvantage when we were recruiting. At least we would have the Weasley twins, probably Loony, She-Weasel (Ginny Weasley), and some others if we're lucky.

"Dumbledore says so." Granger boldly struck back at him. It was smart, maybe some kids still believed in Dumbledore, if not in Harry.

"So Dumbledore says because _he_ says! The fact is; where's the proof?" I admit, that was good. But, the bad part is; we have no proof that Harry fought Voldemort. Well, besides Cedric, but people somehow _still_ believe that he died randomly. People don't just drop down dead! Well...they do, but not without a cause.

"If Potter could tell us more 'bout how Diggory got killed..." A quiet voice drawled from the left part of the room. Suddenly everyone's faces lit up with curiosity. I realized, that's what they wanted to know more about. They saw it as an opportunity to learn more about that lethal night. Potter's shoulders sagged, and I remembered; he was really traumatized by it. Probably had nightmares. It reminded me of third year, when he had passed out after seeing the Dementor. It had been jolly good fun to make fun of him then, but I could understand why it affected him. Potter stood up and shook his head.

"Look, I'm not going to talk about Cedric, so if that's why you're here; you might as well clear out now." He was clearly having second thoughts on the rebellion. He grabbed Hermione's hand and started to pull her towards the door.

"Come on Hermione, let's go. They're just here because they think I'm some sort of freak." He muttered. She started to protest, but a light voice cut her off.

"Is it true you can produce a patronus charm?" Loony saved us. That was exactly the angle to go with, making everyone see how Harry could teach us. Hermione smiled.

"Yes. I've seen it." She walked Harry back up to the front of the room. Gasps of shock where heard at the back of the room. Producing a patronus charm was hard work; even I couldn't do it properly.

"And he killed a basilisk. With a sword; in Dumbledore's office." Longbottom spoke up.

"It's true." She-Weasel confirmed. She would know. The poor girl was the one who opened the chamber, and was nearly killed there.

"And in third year he fought off about a hundred Dementors at once." Ron spoke highly of his mate. Ah...third year. That's when Sirius Black escaped from Azkaban and the wizarding world went into a panic. I knew he was innocent, with me being related to Death Eaters and all. He's still being blamed for the recent disappearances; when Voldemort's the one at fault.

"And last year he really did fight off You-Know-Who in the flesh." Hermione finished Harry's long list of accomplishments.

"So, yes. Potter really has done some pretty damn impressive stuff." I smirked at him, but he once again shook his head like we just didn't understand him.

"Look," He started. I could immediately tell that this would be exactly like one of Draco's speeches about how he _really_ couldn't have done it alone, and how he had help...

"It all sounds great when you say it like that, but the truth is most of that was just luck." He said modestly. I rolled my eyes. I was psychic. Or I just knew guys very well. "I didn't know what I was doing half the time and I nearly _always_ had help. " He paused.

"Facing this stuff in real life is not like school. In school, if you make a mistake you can just try again tomorrow. But, out there, when you're a second away from being murdered, or watching a friend die right in front of your eyes; you don't know what that's like." His eyes were filled with sorrow as he sat back down in his chair. For a moment, there was nothing but silence as we all pondered over his words. A small boy who I had seen around before, but didn't know his name; broke it.

"He's really back?" Those three simple words contained a question everyone wanted to know. Somewhere deep in their hearts they knew it was true, but decided I was easier just to deny it. Harry nodded. And in that truth, everyone knew what to do. Slowly, one by one; they filed up to the front and signed their names onto the list. A smile light up my face. We were doing it. We were really doing this; we were fighting back.

"Dumbledore's Army. That's our name." I whispered to the trio as the others were still signing. Potter and Weasel were surprised, but Granger just smiled and nodded.

"Yes. Dumbledore's Army sounds perfect."

**!#$%^**

Over the next few days we discussed several different hideouts for the DA. None of them seemed right. Some places weren't big enough, others too easy for Umbridge to find. But there's got to be some place we can practice in secret...the problem is finding it.

The situation with Draco hasn't gotten much better, as I haven't seen very much of him lately; because I've been so busy with the DA. I don't know if he's mad at me, or he thinks I'm still mad at him. Am I still mad at him? I honestly don't know the answer . And I doubt that he would be too happy about me helping Potter. Especially since he joined the Inquisitorial Squad. I mean, really? Why in the bloody hell, would he join Umbridge's little gang? But that's completely up to him.

**!#$%^**

"Longbottom! I didn't know you had it in you!" I exclaimed. Neville had just taken us to the Room of Requirements, or the Come and Go Room. It was absolutely perfect for the DA; and I hadn't even known it existed! Longbottom's face grew red, he obviously wasn't used to my praise.

I stepped forward to the center of the room and thought of a practicing dummy. I thought and I thought until I could think no more. When I opened my eyes there was as a wooden practice Death Eater with a target on it's chest. It had wheels and a wand. It was perfect.

"Let's show them what we're made of." I smiled a true to the _heart_ smile.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Sorry it's short, but I wanted to get **_**something**_** out before tomorrow. Let me know what you think about the DA. And should 'Tara forgive Draco? And how soon do you want to start seeing some Atarah/Harry? I'm thinking of continuing this story over the next books, the 6th and 7th. What do ya think? R&R!**


	6. Remembering Rose

**A/N: Just a little foreword here. I really want to thank all of you reviewers out there!**

** avrilavril: Thanks a lot! You have a good point with Draco...but you'll see what happens soon!**

** kristaniella: There's a bit of Atarah/Harry in this chap, but nothing big! Hope you like it!**

** Penseln: Thanks for reviewing again! And another good point on Draco. There's some Atarah/Harry in here. **

**So...there's somewhat of a surprise in this chapter, although it' more like revealing Atarah's past. Tell me what you think of it!**

"No, Chang, you need to flourish your wand a little more, like this." I was trying to show that Chang girl how to do a simple stunning spell. Being a teacher was bloody hard work. How do they keep their calm when a student won't listen to you? I tried not to groan and modeled the wand work once again. After a while, she got the spell right and I walked over to Fred and George, who were huddled in the corner talking.

"Aren't you supposed to be practicing?" I smirked at them. I hate to admit it, but I have a certain respect for them. They were the ultimate pranksters, and that was fine by me; as long as I'm not the butt of the joke. Fred, or George (I couldn't tell), straitened up and beckoned me forward. They held up a box of chocolates, and I raised an eyebrow.

"They're for Filtch. It'll give him some nasty boils on his face that he won't be able to get rid of for a while." One of them said.

"Perfect. That's sure to teach him a lesson. How come _you_ guys always think of the cool stuff? I just punch people. Not nearly as cool. Okay, even though this _is_ awesome, you really _do_ need to get back to practice." I turned away, but then turned back quickly and asked a question.

"Hope it doesn't offend you...but which one of you is which?" For future reference.

"I'm Fred."

"I'm George." I studied them carefully. There it was! It was in their voices! George's voice was a little different from Fred's, even if only slightly. Ha! I smiled triumphantly and walked over to where Harry was standing.

"So, Potter. What do you think we're going to teach them next?" He looked away from Neville and glanced at me with his emerald eyes. I wish I had his eyes; they were beautiful. Mine were a light green and looked like rubbish. Oh Merlin. I just called Harry's eyes _beautiful. __**B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L**_. Save me. Well, I guess it was true. His jet black hair was messed up and his shirt wasn't tucked in. Boys. If there was no women in the world, men would find a way to annihilate the planet within two seconds of being in control.

I didn't realize that we were still staring at each other, I was so caught up in his eyes. Merlin! _Snap out of it!_ Just because you're teaching together _does not mean you're his friend!_ Says who, a part of my mind screamed out. _Says your __**godfather**_. Oh, yeah. I kinda forget about the whole; opposite sides of the war thing.

"Well, um, I was thinking about patronus charms next." He stumbled over his words. See! He was staring at me just as much as I was staring at him!

"Do you think that they're ready for that? I mean, we've only gotten a couple of spells down. Patronus charms aren't that easy." We've barely tackled Stupify. But I guess if Harry thinks so...

"Well, patronus charms are extremely helpful, so I definitely want them to be able to perform them. But I was thinking we could start out with just a little each day. Spend about ten minutes at the end of DA, and eventually we'd get there." At that point, Neville's spell backfired and his wand flew towards me.

"Protego!" I stopped the wand from hitting me in the face. Neville's cheeks turned beet red, and he lowered his head in shame. I sighed.

"Eventually."

**!#$%^**

"Okay, listen up everyone. We've all learned quite a bit so far; even me. We can actually defend ourselves, somewhat. But we want to go a step further than that. What Harry and I had decided on, is to start lessons on the patronus charm." Everyone was listening intently; their attention captured the second I said patronus.

"First Harry will demonstrate, then we will describe how to perform the charm. Or _Harry_ will, seeing as he's the only one who can actually do it right." Okay, I admit it, I was jealous of Harry. I was curious on what my patronus would be, since I heard that it takes the shape of your personality.

"Harry, if you will." I walked off to the side and let him take the stage. He closed his eyes in a moment of concentration.

"Expecto Patronum!" He yelled, and a perfect silver stag exploded from the tip of his wand. It wandered around the classroom and weaved it's way through the students. There were gasps and exclamations from everyone. The stag stopped it's trotting and stood in front of me and stared. I hesitantly reached out a hand and brought it down on the stag's nose. It was a warm feeling, and just at the touch I felt happiness burst out from inside of me. I laughed merrily, but at the sound of my voice the stag disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

I looked up and saw Harry shaking his head like he was a dog shaking off the water of an unwanted bath. I raised an eyebrow and laughed. I still had that feeling of merriment and couldn't help but smile.

"That was great, Harry. It would have been better had it lasted longer, but hey." I walked back to the center of the room and addressed the rest of the DA. "So that's what a full on patronus charm looks like. Pretty soon we'll get you guys there. And hopefully me. So let's start with the actual charm." I motioned for Harry to finish.

"Uh, yeah. Well...a patronus is a incarnation of the caster's inner positive feelings, such as joy or other happy thoughts. It can't feel despair, so dementors cannot harm it. In order to get it right you need to think of the happiest memory you have, so that's what I want us to do before the next meeting. It's not just a laugh with a friend, or when you got your first cat or dog; it's the _happiest_ moment of your life. It has to be extremely powerful, so I want you guys to spend the next week thinking about what it is." Harry concluded. The happiest moment of my life, hmmmm...I think I knew what mine was.

"Class dismissed." I made a shooing gesture with my hand, and they slowly started to file out of the Room of Requirement. I looked up at Harry and couldn't help but wonder what his happy memory is. The poor guy probably didn't have very many. I frowned. I didn't have that many either, just that one...and in an instant, I was reliving it.

**!#$%^**

**A few minutes later...**

**!#$%^**

"Atarah? Are you okay? Atarah!" I looked up to see Harry shaking my shoulders. I quickly shook my head and stepped away from him. That was my happiest memory. To another person besides me, it might seem extremely sad. But to me; I've never felt that way before in my life. It was pure joy.

"Atarah? What's the matter?"

"Nothing!" I turned back around to face him. He still looked worried. "Nothing that you should be concerned with, Potter." I was still shaken up. "And why the hell does it matter to you anyways?"

He looked hurt.

"Maybe it's because I have a heart."

"You know what? I'm fine with not having a heart! I'm an expert at it, in fact! I excel when it comes to having a black heart! I excel when it comes to being a sarcastic bitch! I excel when it comes to being a pushing people away! I _EXCEL_ WHEN IT COMES TO BEING A GOD DAMN MISTAKE!" I was counting it off on my fingers and laughing. There was a moment of silence when each of us were staring at each other.

"You don't have a black heart. You're not a bitch. And you're _not_ a mistake." His green eyes never left mine. I sighed and looked away.

"How do you know that?" He didn't know me at all. The only person who came close to it was Draco, and that's not exactly going to well right now.

"Because I've seen t. You can be a good person. Far more than I expected for a Slytherin." That made me laugh.

"You're pretty good for a Gryffindor, I guess." I admitted. Harry was a good person. The only problem was that he was on the opposite side of the war. And that changed everything. The smile dropped from my face, and I walked out.

My happy memory was still haunting me. It usually had a good effect on me, but now all I felt was guilt. Endless guilt.

**!#$%^**

_ "Come on, sissy!" My little sister giggled as she pulled insistently on my hand. Her brown hair flapped behind her; the hair I was so jealous of. I had to get the blonde hair, like so many of the Manstons before me. She got the lucky gene, from my mother's side. Our grandmother had hair the exact same shade as hers._

_ "Rose, slow down would you? And stop pulling so hard, you're going to tear off my arm!" I tried to scold her as she lead me to some unknown place in the fields beyond our home. The long blades of grass stung my arms as we ran through them. Today was my tenth birthday, and my sister had a surprise for me. One that was pretty important, considering the way she was yanking on my arm._

_ "We're almost there, only a bit farther! You'll like it, I just know it! I worked on it for __**ages**__! Of course, mum and dad could have done it in half the time, but I can't do magic yet." Rose was only six, so I can't imagine she did anything too big, she's probably just going to give me one of her old toys. As she continued to pull on my arm, I noticed where we were heading towards. _

_ A long time ago, our ancestors had a guest house that they used for storage. When my great- grandmother and grandfather owned our house, they stopped using it and it fell into disrepair. When my parents had us, we found it and turned it into something like a "club-house". It was very small, well; small for us. For any normal person it would be a very __**large**__ house._

_ As we approached the guest house, Rose turned around and smiled._

_ "Put this on!" She handed me a piece of cloth. I rolled my eyes, but played along and tied it around my head. She once again took hold of my hand and pulled me into the house. I could feel the old tile beneath my feet, and something else that I couldn't quite tell what it was. After about fifteen steps, we stopped. Small hands turned me around and untied the cloth._

_ I stood in awe at the image before me. My mouth was wide open, and I did nothing to close it. I looked at Rose in disbelief, and her grin was so wide it almost didn't fit on her small face. She had decorated the house. New paint covered the walls, red-my favorite color. Portraits were hanging from various spots on the red walls, and they made me stop and stare._

_ One was of me holding a newborn Rose in my arms. I had a look of complete happiness on my four year old face and I kept glancing down at her tiny face in awe . Another was of Rose handing me a bunch of flowers and me hugging her. This was taken two years ago, when I had gotten back from a trip to Rome. Rose was too young to go at the time, and missed me. When I had seen her, she had a bouquet of roses picked just for me._

_ There were others as well, many more, but I quickly looked to see what else there was. Of course, something caught my attention right away. The floor was red. But it wasn't painted, they were petals. Rose petals. They __**covered**__ the floors, the white of the tile could not be seen. It must have taken a thousand roses to create this._

_ "Oh! There's more, come on!" I offered no resistance as she pulled me up the stairs to the master bedroom. Rose petals still covered the floors, and were probably throughout the whole entire house. As we entered the room, I immediately noticed the new furniture. There was a new couch that had "Sisters" on it. It didn't look like it was painted, and looked like it was the result of some spell._

_ The was a fire place, as well. What I had failed to notice was on the new bunk bed. There was a dog. A __**dog**__. It was a mixed breed, but it was beautiful all the same. It hopped down and wandered over to us._

_ "I found her while I was shopping in Diagon Alley. Nobody was paying her any attention, and almost stepped on the poor thing. So I went up to her and she followed me home. I know we'll have to keep her a secret from mum and dad, but I thought you'd like her. What do you want to name it? You get to choose." _

_ "Rose..." I whispered._

_ "Yes?" She tilted her head in curiosity. I shook my head._

_ "Rose. That's what I want to call the dog." I kneeled down and petted the sweetheart. Rose muttered an "oh", from behind me. I got up and hugged her._

_ "Thank you Rose. This is the best birthday I've ever had." That made her smile._

_ "Good. I had to ask for a lot of money for this. It took over a month to finish as well. While I was in Diagon Alley, this woman..." Rose kept on talking, and I kept on listening. Eventually she fell asleep on the new bed, with her head resting on the dog's body. I was about to fall asleep myself when she spoke._

_ "'Tara? I love you, you know that, right? I love you a lot." She whispered quietly._

_ "I love you too, Rose. I love you more than you could imagine." I smiled. Sometimes she could be so innocent. Most of the time she could pass for thirteen, that's how mature she was. _

_ "Do you love me like the rose petals on the floor?" She whispered even quieter. She was falling asleep, drifting off into a deep sleep filled with good dreams._

_ "I love you like the stars in the sky. Too much to count. Now go to sleep." There was silence, and I figured that she fell asleep. I closed my eyes, and was drifting off, but I heard her say one last thing._

_ "I'll love you forever, 'Tara. Forever and ever and ever."_

**!#$%**

The happiest memory of my life was of my little sister.

**A/N: Oh god, this isn't really a good chapter, I'm so sorry. Go ahead and throw rotten fruit at me. Sorry! Anyways, yes. Atarah had a sister, Rose. Such a little sweetie...grrrr. So of course, Harry reached out to 'Tara, and...she yet again pushed him away. There'll be more of Draco in the next chapter, and **_**maybe**_** more of Rose. What do you think? And some of you are probably wondering, "Rose is only six! How did she decorate a whole house!" Well, she asked her mum and dad for money, and then went shopping! I will just say this now; Rose is extremely mature! And the memory may not seem that **_**happy**_**, but to Atarah, it is. If something doesn't make any sense, go ahead and ask me! I'd love to have your opinion!**


	7. Choosing Sides

**A/N: Hey guys! Here's the next chapter! It may or may not be that good, I don't really know because I am **_**drugged**_** up on painkillers. Yep. I broke my ankle trying to through a snowball at my mother. She said it was karma. I said it was because the world hates me. Either way, my ankle's still broken. The fun part about it was that we were out of town, coming back to Tucson; so I had to wait **_**two and a half hours**_** before I could go to the E.R. Yep. Anyways, enough of my self-pity and onto the story!**

I was storming down one of Hogwart's many hallways when the twins found me. I was in a foul mood, but I tried not to glare at them as they walked up to me.

"Why hello there. And why might such a lovely young lady such as yourself-"

"Be wandering the dark-"

"Lonely corridors of our beloved Hogwarts?" George finished off. I could never understand how they could know what the other was going to say, but I guess that's part of being a twin. I didn't answer and kept walking. I didn't know where I was walking to, but I was just walking. The twins exchanged glances. I didn't understand _that_ either. How they could say a million things to each other in just a look.

"Well then. We just thought it fair to warn you-"

"Wandering Hogwarts isn't safe anymore."

"That Umbridge woman is questioning anyone she can get her hands on." I shrugged. They weren't going to get anything out of any of us. We were stronger than that.

"So? Let her question us. We won't give in." I walked faster, but they soon matched my pace. Fred stepped in front of me .

"Well, you see-"

"Not quite that simple, I'm afraid."

"She's using Veritaserum." That made my blood freeze. Veritaserum?

"That evil toad! What does she think she's doing? She..." I couldn't fully express my hatred for her. She was an animal! My gaze fell to my left hand. It had healed in these past few weeks, but the words were still clear against my pale white skin. _I must not be a brat_. The perfect one for her would be;_ I must not be a bitch_. I smirked.

"Can you guys do anything about this? _Anything_?" She needed to know just how welcome she is here at Hogwarts. The twins glanced at each other mischievously.

"Well, we do have some _little_ things."

"But we're saving the big finale for a..._special_ time. But yes-"

"We can do something about it." I smiled and nodded my thanks. I started to walk away once again.

"Be careful out there!"

"You don't know what big bad Slytherins could be out there-"

"Waiting to gobble you up and tear out your poor soul!" As I was about to turn a corner, I looked over my shoulder at them. They were clutching their chests dramatically.

"I'm sure I can handle them."

**!#$%^**

It was against the rules, I know, you don't need to tell me, but I made my way over to the edge of the Forbidden Forest. It was dark out, and there was a thick fog. I hadn't been near here since my detention with Harry. After that we'd done simple stuff for Hagrid; not really detention worthy.

The ground was covered in the roots of the giant trees, and I carefully stepped my way over to a clear spot and sat down. As long as you're not actually _in _the Forbidden Forest, it can be quite relaxing. It gave me time to think over some things. I'd decided that I'd really need to think about my answer to Dumbledore's offer. I sighed. I honestly didn't know what to say to him. Some part of me thought that it would solve everything, but another said that it would just make it worse.

If I said yes, I would never be accepted into my family again. I'd be disowned. My family could be complete jerks sometimes, but they were still my family! Would I be _able_ to betray them? And what about Draco? I couldn't ask him to side with me, but if I didn't, would he fight against me? Would he chose his family over me? Of course he would. We had spoken briefly once before about Voldemort.

He had said that he was scared of him, which I totally get. But would Draco be scared enough that he would side with him, in fear of getting upsetting him? And if he left, what would become of Narsissa and Lucius? Would _they_ be punished for their son's crimes?

And what of _my_ parents? If I said yes to Dumbledore, would Voldemort take that as my parent's failure? Would he punish them?

I didn't know if I could do that to them. I'd just have to deal with everything; for their sake. I could handle it. I'd _been_ handling it for my entire life now. Even when Voldemort had been "destroyed", my parents had remained faithful.

I had made up my mind. It'd better be bloody worth it. The worst part would be telling Dumbledore; no, after he would risk so much to protect me. I closed my eyes in frustration. Why? Why _me?_ I was only fifteen! _Fifteen_! I shouldn't have to deal with all of this drama. I shouldn't have to worry about Voldemort! I shouldn't be mixed up in all of this! Why couldn't the Ministry do _something_ about it? _Because they're bloody idiots, that's why_; a voice in my head answered. Why did _kids_ have to try to save our world?

Just then, a someone cleared their throat. I looked up to see Weasel. Wait a second...Ronald Weasley? Standing in front of _me_? The world was surely going to end.

"Well, I er, wanted to apologize to you. My actions were...wrong" His voice sounded pained, as if the mere words hurt him. I smirked.

"Go ahead, then." I waved him on. He looked confused and there was an obvious question written on his face.

"What do you mean? That _was_ my apology, I...er...um." I had to laugh at that. Of course. A four worded apology. I should have known.

"Of course. And beautifully said, too." His ears grew red and he looked uncomfortable. After a moment, he sat down as well and leaned against one of the many trees. There was silence, but it wasn't that awkward. It was...well, just normal. We sat there for several minutes.

"Weasel? I believe I owe you an apology as well. Except, I believe it will be longer and have better word choice. I am sorry. For _multiple_ things. For all of the years I have made fun of you. For all of the years I had insulted your family. For all of the times where I had insulted your friends and your honor. I may have meant it at the time, but I regret it now. You _are_ a good person, far better than I will ever be. You're always there for your friends, no matter _what_ it may take. You'll stand up for your family; something I've always admired. You're a good person, and I just wanted to let you know how much I envy you." There you have it. I apologized to Weasel. It was pretty good, I have to admit.

"You're not too bad yourself. Before you joined the DA, I had thought you were some kind of...of...well; not very nice things. But now, now that you've shown your true self; you're not bad at all. Well, maybe just a _little_, but that's not the point. And I do admire the fact on how calm you can be, I mean, you live with _Death Eaters_! Everyone knows that. And there _are_ some rumors going around that _you're_ a Death Eater, but I don't believe them. You're not _that_ bad." He wasn't really that sensitive, was he?

"Why _thank_ you, Ronald." I muttered with a small laugh.

"Hey, you called me by my first name!" He looked surprised, and I laughed again.

"I was being sarcastic, so it doesn't count. Besides, I like calling you Weasel! What else would you like me to call you? Nothing else sounds as good...ginger, carrot top, tomato head, Reddy's not too bad, Rubylocks sounds too girly, soo yeah. Weasel's the only thing that'd be okay." I had been counting off the names on my fingers.

"Ron sounds good to me. I'm okay with it, you know." I smirked once again.

"Okay, _Ronald_." I said, smirk still in place. Wease-_Ron_ groaned.

"_Ron_, please! Just _Ron_. The only person who calls me _Ronald_ is my mother."

"All the more reason."

**!#$%^**

The next morning I was making my way to Dumbledore's office. I had to tell him my answer, which I was not too happy about. I quickly said the password, which was still Fizzing Whizbee. I ran up the hated stairs and entered the cozy office. Dumbledore looked up from the papers on his desk and motioned for me to sit down, which I did.

"So, my dear, I'm guessing you have an answer for me." he smiled brightly at me. I wonder if it's a spell that makes his eyes twinkle that much. It's not natural!

"Yes I do, sir. I have been thinking about this quite a bit, and it's been very hard for me." I said, thinking of all the times I've sat and pondered the consequences of both life changing answers. He nodded at me to continue.

"I can't do it." I buried my head in my hands, feeling ashamed of myself. He's offering something so generous, and yet I'm turning it down. What kind of abomination am I?

"When I first thought about it, I was almost going to say yes; but then I realized how selfish that was. This wouldn't just affect me, it would affect everyone else!" I looked up at him desperately. "What about my parents? What about Draco? If I accepted your help, I would be betraying them, I would break Draco's heart!" I put my head back in my hands, trying not to let tears overtake me.

"I see? So it is Draco that changed your mind. We could protect him as well, you must know." I shook my head gently.

"Draco would never say yes, I know him. And it's not just about _him_, it's lots of other things as well. I may not support Voldemort, but I'm sure as hell not going to get up and join the other side of the war! I've grown up learning about how muggles are filth, and how we're better than them! I've grown up with Bellatrix Lestrange teaching me _the three unforgivable curses_! I've grown up trying to save my sister from being beaten by our parents! And nothing, not even your protection, can change that." Tears were still threatening my sorrow filled eyes, so I quickly blinked them away. He smiled sadly at me.

"Yes. Nothing we do can change the past, I'm afraid. But we can do _many_ things to change the future." Why does he have to be so wise?

"But what I'm trying to say, is that I come from...bad ingredients. You can't make anything good out of that. I'll _never_ be good. Perhaps if I had a different childhood, or different parents, or even different friends, I might have been different, but as it is; I'm fit for only one side, and unfortunately, it's _his_ side. There's nothing you can do. Nothing. I've tried." And I have. I've tried to be different from my parents, but I kept slipping, and eventually I decided, why should I keep fighting?

"Ah, Atarah. Maybe you should just add another...ingredient. That could change your recipe into a masterpiece." What did he mean by that? His eyes were sparkling like fireworks at this point, but there soon was a knock at the door and he looked up.

"Come in." The door opened to reveal Harry looking confused when he saw me. I quickly wiped away any stray tears that had betrayed my eyes.

"Just remember Atarah, add another ingredient." He smiled and looked pointedly at Harry. W-what? Harry? H-he, _what!_ I whipped me head back and forth between them. No! But...what! I stood and rushed out of the room. My mind was whirling at the thought of what Dumbledore said. Harry? I should...add Harry? Into my life? But he was on the opposite side of the war! I shouldn't even be in the DA! I'm not on his side! I'm not-I'm n-not!

"Atarah! Slow down!" Harry called out from behind me. I ran faster. I liked Harry, but I _couldn't_. He was such a good guy, but I'm as good as a Death Eater to him! I ran as fast as my body could allow, running...running away from everything. My fear, my feelings, trying to get away...

"Atarah, please...stop!" Harry was still chasing after me. Why? What did he see in me? I was heartless, soulless, a monster. Why would he ever want to be civil to me? I belonged in Azkaban, I deserved to be killed mercilessly.

Something grabbed my arm and pulled me to them. It was Harry. Of course it was Harry. Who else would chase after a monster? I crumbled into his arms and _cried_. Everything came out then, with Harry's strong arms holding me. He didn't say anything, just held me. How could he be so..so...pure? He was innocent! He was on the opposite side of the war...if I fought against him, he would kill me. If I defended my family he would have to kill me, _eventually_.

He might as well kill me now. End everything, the darkness, the pain...

"Atarah, please, listen to me." Harry's voice called me out of my thoughts. I sobbed even harder as I looked up into his beautiful eyes. I admitted it. His eyes were beautiful. Too beautiful. Just the sight of them made the guilt set in. My family wanted him dead. They want to kill the person who thwarted the dark lord as a child. How could he even look at me? I lowered me head, wanting him to leave me, to do the smart thing and just walk away.

"'Tara..." I looked up at him then. I should have been furious at his use of my nickname...but I wasn't. He leaned forward, slowly coming closer. My mind was screaming at me. _NO! You bloody idiot get AWAY FROM HIM!_ But why should I? I was memorized by his lips as they drew closer. _HE'S THE BLOODY BOY-WHO-LIVED! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING! _I inhaled quickly and pulled away from him.

"No, no, _NO_!" I shook my head, tears still falling freely. Harry reached out his hand.

"Atarah, please!" He begged. I had a choice. A choice between sides. To fight alongside Harry, or to fight against him, alongside Draco. It was a choice that would define me, shape who I am. In those two words, Harry begged me to chose his side, even if he didn't realize it. This choice...this choice would be final. If I choose Harry, I would lose Draco. I would lose my family. If I chose Voldemort, I would lose Harry. I would lose the DA. I would lose Dumbledore. I would even lose bloody Weasel. So I chose.

I shook my head, and ran away from Harry Potter.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Morbid; I know. I was listening to depressing songs while listening to this. Soooo...anyways! Several important things happened in this chapter. First-Ron and Atarah made up (I almost called him Weasel right then o.O). Second-Atarah refused Dumbledore's offer. Third-She chose Voldemort over Harry. Now when she said that the choice was final, she meant that if she chose Voldemort; no more talking to Harry. Yep. Oh! And how could I forget! Fourth-HARRY AND ATARAH ALOMST KISSED! It doesn't mean that they're **_**madly **_**in love, NOT AT **_**ALL**_**! Atarah was crying and they both felt something towards each other, and it was impulse! So before some of you say-It's too soon for that! Don't worry. I have no plans for them to fall in love **_**anytime**_** soon. Especially since she chose Voldemort. Tell me what you think!**


	8. A Mission, a Dream, and a Best Friend

**A/N: So here's the next chapter, although I didn't get very many reviews from the last one. Please R&R! Oh and the first part is inn third person, so if it sucks I'm sorry. I usually don't write in third person. And here goes!:**

**!#$%^**

**Rayanne Manston's POV...**

**!#$%^**

"My Lord..." Rayanne Manston knelt before the dark lord, her smooth forehead nearly touching the ground. Her blonde hair was neatly tied into a bun, and her robes were a dark emerald color.

"Rise." Voldemort's strong, snake-like voice commanded his servant. She stood quickly, her face emotionless as she faced her master.

"You called, my lord?" Her voice was strong as well, filled with years of experience.

"There seems to be some...complications in our plan. I have formulated a new and better one, from the ashes of the old. Your daughter, Atarah Manston, she is in Potter's year; correct?" Rayanne fidgeted uncomfortably. She never liked her daughter to interfere with any...official Death Eater business. She'd always mess something up.

"Yes, my lord. That is correct." She said with a respectful nod of her head.

"Good...good. That will work. I will want you to owl her immediately. She will be our...spy, I suppose you could say." Rayanne's head shot up. Atarah could not be trusted with the job, she thought madly.

"B-but, my lord, isn't that Severus's job? And he's a better spy than a _child_ would make!" She stuttered. Voldemort's eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Are you doubting my judgment, Rayanne?" He spat with venom. She shook her head quickly and dropped to her knees once again.

"N-never! My l-lord! I was merely wondering, since we already have Severus! P-please forgive me, m-my lord, I meant no disrespect!" She begged.

"You are forgiven; now rise! I want Atarah to..._get to know_, Potter. Befriend him. And _that_ is something Severus would never be able to do. Now go! Owl her and tell her of this! She must not be caught, or there will be...severe...consequences." He stroked his snakes skin lovingly. Rayanne bowed and rushed out of the room furiously.

Atarah had better not mess this up, or she'll have a certain spell just waiting for her, Rayanne thought cruelly. And with a disturbing laugh, she went to get her owl.

**!#$%^**

**Atarah's POV**

**!#$%^**

I had been laying on my bed crying for some time now. Was this choice the right one? _No, but it's the right one for you..._That voice had been haunting me for hours now. So was the hurt look Harry had after I rejected him. It almost, _almost_ being the key word here, broke my heart. But I had to get over it. I _had to_. I had taken a deep breath when an owl flew in through the open window. It was my mothers.

My heart raced in fear as I took the envelope that was waiting in the bird's beak. I gently peeled it open and grabbed he piece of paper inside.

_My dearest Atarah,_

_I hope that this letter reaches you safely, for it would be the __greatest__ shame if it didn't. This letter brings important news with it, news that you should __actually__ listen to. Your life depends on it. The dark lord has a mission for you. An __important__ one, so DONT mess it up! The dark lord wishes to have eyes on the inside of Hogwarts. He wishes you to befriend that Potter boy and get him to tell you all of his secrets. Then __you__ tell them to __us__. Simple enough. As long as you don't mess it up, which that would be unfortunate for __you__. My __darling__ girl, be __strong_. _Or else._

_With endless love,_

_Rayanne Manston_

At first I laughed at her attempt to be _loving_ but then it set in. They wanted me to spy on Harry. On Harry. I didn't know if I could do it. _You have to!_ The voice reminded me. It made sense. I had to. I had chosen Voldemort's side, had I not? Well, this is a mission, so I need to carry it out. But the mere mention of my _mission_ made my stomach clench. _You have to do this or they'll kill you. What's a little bit of spying compared to being killed?_ It made sense, so I quickly closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep. And fell right into a nightmare.

**!#$%^**

I was in a meadow, the ones behind our home. The sun was up and it was bright outside. It was warm, like I could feel the sun's rays on my arms.

"'Tara? That you?" I looked over to see Rose heading towards me. Usually it would freak me out, like _really_ freak me out, but this was not unusual. She often came to me in my dreams, whether it was real or not.

"Yep. I'm here." She smiled and ran over to my side. At this point she was eleven years old. The age she would be now, if she were... if she...

"Good! And stop having such negative thoughts! It's not good for your brains! And you have a lot of them." She could sense my thoughts as well. She sat down beside me.

"So. What are you going to do?" I sighed and shrugged.

"I don't know, Rose. Well, I _do_, I think. I _have_ to do it. Spy on Harry. "Or else." So mum says. I muttered.

"Ah. Witch with a capitol B!" She smirked. She had the typical smirk that she got from me. I elbowed her.

"Rose! I don't care if our mum is the evilest person in the world, you're only eleven! No foul language!" I laughed, failing to be stern. Rose just shrugged and started pulling on a lock of her brown hair.

"You know what I think you should do? I think you shouldn't listen to whatever mum says. Accept Dumbledore's offer. You could have a _much _better life. You could have new friends, new loves-" She elbowed me. "New everything! I think it'll make you happy." I shook my head.

"But Rose, it may be good for me, but it'd make everything worse for everyone else! I can't do that to them. Even if it means hurting...Harry." There was silence.

"You could at least feed them false information. Maybe _some_ of the truth, but not enough to get anyone killed." She whispered quietly. She was genius. Yeah, That's what I'll do. Thanks Rose, I thought.

"Your welcome, 'Tara. Now get to bed. Love ya." And as the dream faded into blackness, I whispered-

"I love you like the stars in the sky. Too much to count."

**!#$%^**

"Miss Manston! Please! Pay attention in class!" McGonagall called me out of my thoughts. My head snapped up and I said sorry, even though I didn't mean it. I was awaiting DA, because I still didn't know what to do, even with Rose's advice. The classes flew by. And in the snap of finger it was time. I was walking from my last class to the Room of Requirement when he stepped in front of me.

Draco.

**!#$%^**

I blinked multiple times, wondering if I was hallucinating. Draco hadn't talked to me in days, weeks even.

"Oh...I...erm...uh...what...how...I...um." Was all I could get out. His face remained expressionless as he looked at me.

"I came to apologize. And I don't expect you to accept, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry." And with that, he started to walk away. I didn't want him to, but I didn't know what to say.

"Wait!" I called after him, and he turned around. "I...um...err..well." I stuttered once again. He wanted to know if I forgave him, that was the question asked in his eyes. And did I? I shouldn't, I knew. But he was my best friend. I was lost without him. I ran up to him, and nearly tackled him to the floor with a hug. He was surprised, but then relaxed and hugged me back.

"I missed you." I whispered truthfully into his chest. It'd been hard without him.

"I missed you too." He answered back. We stayed like that for a long time, when a throat cleared; letting us know that we weren't alone. I turned around to see Harry and the twins staring at us. Harry looked a bit mad, while the twins were smirking. I could feel Draco start to make some rude remark, but I shook my head.

"Draco, don't." He looked confused, but didn't say anything. The twins spoke up.

"Well, we'd hate to ruin such a-"

"Beautiful moment-"

"But we need to borrow Atarah." Harry still looked mad, but there was a bit of sadness in his eyes as well. It confused me.

"Well, I'm afraid we've got better things to do." Draco spat at them. For just a split second I was horrified at his rude behavior. Then I realized how much I've changed. I used to be that rude too. I shook my head.

"Draco, well, I kinda _do_ have to go with them." I muttered. His look of hatred turned to one of shock.

"What! Why?" He insisted.

"Well, for a...project." I could tell he was wary, but he shrugged and let it go.

"Fine. But you know where to find me if you need anything." He gave one last glare at the twins and Harry, then swept away from us. When he was gone from sight, there was an awkward silence. We all just stood there, until Fred and George broke it.

"Come on, little one!"

"Off to go teach everyone about the patronus charm!" They each took one of my hands and started to drag me away, but I held back.

"Hang on a second, guys." I walked back to where Harry still stood, and gently took his hand. He looked up in surprise, and I smiled at him.

"Come on." I tugged on his hand and started walking, hands still linked, leaving Fred and George staring.

"Where's my money?" George whispered triumphantly to Fred.

"Shut up."

**!#$%^**

It's amazing how people can stare. Well, Harry and I had walked into the Room of Requirements hand in hand, and then there was complete silence. I was mortified, and started to take my hand from his, but he held on tighter and smiled at me. I felt myself automatically smiling back. _Stop it!_ The voice yelled at me. _Shut up. _I yelled right back. When I looked back up at the DA, people were still staring silently with their mouths wide open. Ron looked like he was ready to faint. Hermione looked conflicted between cautious and happy, but eventually settled for a small smile.

Loony was smiling brightly in a corner. Chang looked like she wanted to murder someone. The other Gryffindors were just shocked. I mean, of course they would be. I'm the Ice Queen, right?

"Does everyone have their memory?" I smirked. Slowly people stopped staring and nodded. I reluctantly let go of Harry's hand and walked to the center of the room with him.

"Alright everyone. We're going to try something. I don't expect it to work on the first try, but we're just testing it out. When I count to three I want everyone to do this." He demonstrated the wand work of the spell. After everyone got it right, he counted to three. Nothing happened. Despite our warnings, people looked disappointed, especially Hermione. She looked _very_ frustrated.

After many Expecto Patronum's and very little success, I let myself think. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Except this time it was about Harry. I didn't know what I was going to do. I needed to "befriend him" to learn his secrets, but how would I do that without him knowing? _You need to distance yourself from him._ But if I did, I wouldn't learn anything! _Distance your heart from him. Befriend him, be with him, but don't let your heart get caught in this tangled web of emotions._ That actually made sense. Thank you! Err, thank _me_!

I'd have to be friends with Potter, but I wouldn't let my heart feel anything towards him. I could do it, I knew it! And yet I still felt sorry for him; for using him. _You made your choice_. Yeah, I guess I did.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: So what do you guys think? About Atarah's mission, about Draco, about everything? About Atarah's mother? About Harry? Let me know!**


	9. Kisses and Strange Feelings

**!#$%^**

**Rayanne Manston's POV...**

**!#$%^**

Rayanne walked gracefully across the room to where her husband stood, waiting for her. She wrapped her arms around him and whispered into his ear.

"Atarah has been given a mission by the dark lord..." Her husband jerked away from her in surprise. His eyes flashed red, like they did anytime he was upset.

"_What?_ Atarah? That _brat_? How could the dark lord trust her with a _mission_! She doesn't deserve it, with all the trouble she's given us! There must be a mistake!" He started to pace the room furiously. "He trusts _her_, more than us! Impossible!" He continued to pace, eyes still glinting red. Rayanne put her hand on his arm, stopping him from going any farther.

"Liam, please-" She was cut off by a slap to the face. She was thrown off of him with such force that she fell to the ground, her neat blonde hair falling from its bun. She held her cheek gently, trying to ignore the stinging sensation. She forced herself not to cower away as her husband strode over to her side and looked down on her with venom.

"You _dare_ to lay a hand on me?" He spat at her, eyes flashing dangerously. Rayanne lowered her head painfully.

"It was a mistake. Please forgive me, it shall never happen again." She whispered. There were many times she questioned her marriage to him. She would never bring it up, of course, but she couldn't help but wonder. A long time ago, before Tom Riddle had transformed into Voldemort, Liam Manston was a true gentleman. He courted her, the most beautiful girl in school, and she gave into him.

No one could tear them apart. _No one_. But then Voldemort grew to his full power. Liam took this as an opportunity to help his family, and Rayanne couldn't refuse him. She was pregnant with Atarah at the time, and went with her husband. Rayanne's mother had warned her, said it would ruin their lives; _Atarah's_ life, but who was Rayanne to say no to her husband? It was a choice she would learn too regret. Liam turned into a _monster_ and treated her and Atarah horribly.

Having no other choice, Rayanne shut off her heart to everyone and anyone, including her daughters.

**!#$%^**

**Atarah's POV...**

**!#$%**

"I think that you're going to regret your choice later on." Rose's voice called out to me. I opened my eyes to find that we were in the same place as last time, the soft grass of the meadow cushioning us. I closed my eyes once again and sighed.

"Rose, please...I don't need your help anymore. I _finally_ know what I'm going to do, and I have to stick to it. No matter if I like it or not, so _lay off_." I snapped at her. I immediately felt guiltily when I saw her face filled with hurt, and her eyes filled with tears.

"Rose, don't cry please. I'm sorry. I just don't have any other choice." I scooted onto my back and watched the clouds pass by. That was funny, clouds in a dream. Hmmm...

"You're going to break his heart, you know. I can see it..." Rose was looking up into the sky as well, with her eyes closed. I shook my head; denying it.

"No, he's stronger than that." Rose turned to look at me with a sad expression.

"You'll break your own heart, as well." A raindrop fell onto my forehead, but I quickly wiped it away.

"No, you're wrong. I'm keeping my heart out of this!" I stood up and stared at Rose. She was at least a foot shorter than me, but at that moment she seemed to be hundreds of miles _taller_ than me. What started out as a single raindrop, turned into a rainstorm. In a matter of seconds the sun went away, bringing darkness upon Rose and I. She was still staring at me with a sad expression.

She was like grandma. She didn't inherit the Slytherin traits from our father, like me. I was almost positive that she was a Gryffindor. That would've caused some trouble with our parents. I shook my head, flinging water in every direction.

"Rose, you should go." I turned away from her, walking off into the tall grass.

"Y-you, want me to go?" I could hear the tears in her voice. She didn't understand. She was too young.

"I-I'm n-not t-t-too young! I-I c-can understand! I-I _can_! It's you who doesn't understand! _Y-you_! You want me to go? Fine I-I'll g-go!" And in a matter of seconds, the dream ended.

**!#$%^**

I sat up, covered in sweat. Damn! Rose didn't understand, and would _never_ understand. She couldn't grasp that I was a Slytherin. I was a _cruel coldblooded Slytherin_. I would never be good, I would never be a Gryffindor. There was a reason I was put into my house, a true reason. The sorting hat saw into my heart, and what he saw was that of a Slytherin. And Rose just couldn't understand that.

_"You'll break your own heart, as well..."_ Her voice echoed in my mind. No! Like I had said before, _I was keeping my heart out of this!_ I shook my head, and got out of my bed. I quickly dressed and went downstairs.

No one was there, except for one person, the one I needed to see.

"Draco!" I knew that I sounded relieved, and he turned around with a confused expression on his face. I wrapped my arms around him and nearly squeezed the life out of him.

"Couldn't sleep?" He asked, knowing me all too well. I nodded and sat down onto the couch, taking up the entire space. Draco raised one of his perfect blonde eyebrows. How could he do that? Just one, not both.

"No room for me?" He smirked. I think I taught him his smirk. Or he taught me. I don't know, it could be both...but who knows?

"Nope." I shook my head. Draco shrugged and came towards me anyways. And sat down. On. Me.

"Oof!" I gasped as he sat on me.

"_Are-you-a-actually-sitting-on-me_!" I gasped in disbelief.

"Yep." He smirked that damn smirk of his. Of mine. Oh Merlin. I wiggled my way out from under him, finally breaking through. I gasped a mouthful of air. What I had failed to notice was that Draco's head was only about two inches away from my own. Damn. Draco's head slowly came closer, which was nearly impossible because of how close he was already was. I was about to pull away when my mind screamed at me. _Why? Draco's perfect! And it'd keep your mind off of Potter!_ _It doesn't help that he's hot!_ But he's like my brother! I-I can't! But by the time I had decided to pull away, Draco's lips were on mine.

I'd always thought that'd I'd be twenty when I had my first kiss, because I thought that kissing was weird and gross, but I was _definitely_ not complaining now. His lips moved gently against my own, like I was a porcelain doll that could be easily broken. And for several minutes, I was lost. I couldn't think at all. I didn't want to stop.

A throat cleared, making me jump away from Draco, but he held on to me tighter. It reminded me too much of Harry. _No! Don't think of Harry! Idiot!_ I looked up to find Blaise raising his eyebrows at us. I looked back to Draco, only to find that he hadn't ever looked away.

"I hate to interrupt you two love birds, but I was wondering if you guys wanted to go down to breakfast." His eyebrows were still raised; I could tell that he wasn't excepting what he saw. Draco and I have been best friends since we were three, and never _once_ have either us had any romantic intentions towards each other. Or, at least one of us.

"Hey guys, what's all the com-" Pansy had walked down the stairs, but froze when she saw Draco and I. Hatred burned freely in her eyes. I've always known that she had a crush on Draco, well, less of a crush and more of an obsession. She held her head held high, and marched back up the stairs. Blaise let out a laugh. I took a steady breath and stood up.

"Let's go."

**!#$%^**

The walk to the Great Hall was quiet, filled only with small talk between Draco ad Blaise. I was lost in thought. Of course I was thinking about Draco, how could I _not_? I didn't know how I felt. Fall these long years he's been nothing but a brother to me, and who like making out with their brother? _But you enjoyed it! Admit it!_ I don't know why I was arguing with myself, but I answered it-_me_ anyways. I enjoyed the kiss I _do_ have to admit, but I don't know if I felt anything for him._ What?_ I confused myself with that. Draco is a good kisser. What girl wouldn't like it? But did I feel anything deeper than that?

I don't know.

**!#$%^**

And of course, when I entered the Great Hall, who's eyes did I just _have_ to meet? I don't think I even have to say it. Harry gave a small smile, one that I returned halfheartedly. His smile struck something in me. I knew what I had to do.

"Draco, will you walk with me real quick?" I asked as I walked back the way we came in, leaving Blaise alone. I was walking fast, so fast that he had to jog to keep up.

"'Tara! Wait up for a second, will you?" Draco pleaded. I stopped and allowed him to walk up to me. I sighed and grabbed my mother's letter out of my pocket.

"Draco...something's happened. I have a...mission. From-" I gulped. "Voldemort." Draco froze at the mention of a mission. He gently took the piece of paper out of my hands and read it silently. His face remained emotionless through it all, and I fidgeted nervously. After he was done reading, he handed the letter back to me.

"I don't want you getting involved with Potter." He said sternly. I sighed.

"Draco, I-I have no choice! I have to do it, or else...or else I-I'll d-die." Draco took my hand's in his and looked down at me.

"Potter's about as likely to trust you as he would date the Giant Squid." I laughed at his comparison.

"Well maybe Potter has a thing for squids." I joked lamely. His lips turned up into something like a smile.

"That would explain a lot." He sighed. " I know that you have to do it, I just have a bad feeling about this." I nodded and gave him a hug. But then remembered this morning and pulled away quickly.

"Will you come with me? I have to do something." Something I'm not proud of. At. All. But Draco nodded and followed me.

**!#$%^**

I knocked gently on Dumbledore's door.

"Come in!" His kind voice called me into his office. It was the same as ever; just as cozy. I was fidgeting guiltily, but I hoped it appeared as if I was just scared. Dumbledore's eyes were still twinkling as I sat down.

"You knocked this time." He smiled, and I nodded quickly; trying to shake off the immense guilt I was feeling.

"Well, I-I was w-wondering if...i-if it was too late to change my mind."

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Hey guys, so there's that chapter. I want to thank my **_**three**_** loyal reviewers. I know that there's more of you out there! You all add this story to your alerts! I can tell! So **_**please**_** review. But here's a shout out to my three awesome peeps! I want to thank avrilavril, for your encouraging words of advice! (U R AWESOME!). I want to thank kristanella, for always reviewing when no one else will. (U R AWESOMEE!). And finally I want to thank Penseln, for **_**always**_** giving me the right advice and lots of encouragement when I really needed it. YOU ARE THE BEST PERSON ON THE PLANET! Okay, now that it looks like I won some kind of award, tell me what you think! I appreciate it (sorry for the shortness of the chap!)!**


	10. A Deadly Explosion

**A/N: Hey guys, here's the next chapter, sorry for the wait. Just got back from watching Wicked. It was AWESOME. I bawled so much at the end. And when the lights blacked out, I immediately stood up, and I was the **_**only**_** one. Heehee...Most people wait a little while before standing, but apparently not me...Ah well, so just wanted to thank all of my lovely reviewer, there's more of you now. Thanks to **_**Penseln, avrilavril, kristanella, timmm, Courtneyfan14, SonsofAnarchyQueen, J-Chan, **_**and **_**DreamingsAReprieve. **_**Thanks so much for all of your feedback. And for those of you who don't really like Atarah's mom, neither do I! But you'll see a bit of her good side in this chapter. And without further ado, here's the story:**

**!#$%^**

Dumbledore's smile never faltered. It was just as bright as always; it was too bright. More guilt washed over me, and I couldn't help but wonder how he couldn't see through me. Maybe he could, but that doesn't make any sense.

"Of course not, Atarah. I'm glad you changed your mind. Now we need to make plans. You obviously can't go to your house for Christmas, so I'll arrange for you to go to the Burrow." He started making the plans for my protection. Wait..

"Um, w-what's a burrow?" Like as in a burrow in the ground! Dumbledore laughed.

"_The_ Burrow. The Weasley's family home. I'm sure they would be happy to have you." I tried to hold it in, but I couldn't help myself from laughing. Happy? I'm bloody _spying_ on them!

"The Order will _always_ be happy to help those in need." That sobered me up. They would be happy to help me, and I'm repaying them by giving Voldemort their secrets. I was a monster. I nodded, and let Dumbledore continue.

"Anytime spent outside of Hogwarts, including summer, will be spent away from your family. Would that be okay with you, Atarah?" He asked gently, and I returned it with a quick nod. The hardest part would be being away from Draco, but I'm a big girl. I can make it through.

The next thirty minutes were spent deciding where I would go for the next few months. It all made sense, and soon I was sent on my way, and I rushed out of the office gratefully. Draco was leaning against the wall, still waiting for me.

"How did it go?" He asked as he started walking.

"Okay, I guess." I muttered. He rolled his eyes at me.

"So what are the plans for 'your safety'?"

"Well, I'm supposed to go TheBurrow, for Christmas..." I trailed off. Draco tilted his head out of curiosity.

"What's a burrow?" I laughed. Again, Draco and I were so alike. As I thought about it, we were almost _exactly_ the same. Besides both being blonde and in Slytherin, our families were both supporters of Voldemort, and are Death Eaters. Practically twins. Siblings. The only difference is-

"Atarah?" Draco shook me out of my thoughts. Oh yeah...

"_The_ Burrow. The Weasley family home." I explained. His nose wrinkled in disgust and he shook his head.

"I can't believe someone like _you_, would have to ever step foot in some place like _that_. It's disgusting." His words were almost offensive.

"Wel-" _Opposite sides. Opposite sides. _"I-I guess you're right. But you have to do what you have to do, right?" I murmured silently. Draco shrugged and continued walking by my side. I sighed and closed my eyes. Which is _not_ a good idea. I guess I decided to forget that I was _walking_. Not exactly a good idea to close your eyes while _walking_.

"Oof!" I exclaimed as I ran into something around the corner, and would have fallen onto the floor had Draco not caught me.

"Watch where you're going, you filthy Mudblood." He spat at Granger, who looked shocked to see me. I widened my eyes at Draco and shook my head slightly at him.

"Sorry, Granger." I dragged Draco away.

"Draco! You're not exactly helping me! I'm supposed to be befriending them!" I tried to remind him. Whether I was defending Granger because of my mission, or because I was starting to like her; was completely irrelevant right now.

"I _still_ don't like the idea of you getting close to Potter. Or anyone in Gryffindor, for that matter..." He muttered, his blonde hair falling out of his gel's hold. I shook my head at him.

"Do you _want_ to get me killed?" I started to walk away, but he didn't follow. I looked over my shoulder at him, only to see him wearing a look a complete and utter shock.

"Atarah, you _know_ I don't. You know better than that. I care about you too much." I froze up instinctively. I still didn't know what the _hell_ I felt towards Draco, and here he was; clearly telling me how _he_ felt. I also didn't want to lead him on if it turns out I didn't feel the same way about him. But why shouldn't I feel that way? He's perfect, right?

But not for me.

"Draco, class is starting."

**!#$%^**

**Rayanne Manston's POV...**

**!#$%^**

Rayanne Manston was sitting in her rocking chair in Atarah's old room. Or, Rose's room. Once Atarah had outgrown it, it became her little sisters. The was still a crib in the room, the crib that Rayanne had to search everywhere for. Some were too small, other's not stylish enough. Finally she went to a muggle place, without telling her husband of course, and found the perfect one.

She sat in the rocking chair like she did many years ago, when she would watch over Atarah, and Rose later on. Rocking herself gently, she tried to fight back tears as she remembered the times when she would listen to Atarah telling Rose a story about fairies and unicorns. And she would tell herself that that should be _her_ telling stories. _She_ should have been the mother to Rose, not Atarah.

Losing the battle, a single tear escaped and rolled down her smooth white cheek.

**!#$%^**

**Draco Malfoy's POV...**

**!#$%**

She walked quickly away from me, and I watched her retreating figure silently. She didn't realize that all these years...all these years I've been infatuated with her. Her laugh, her smile, her _smirk_ made my day seem so much better, without her even trying. Of course she didn't realize it. How could she? I've kept it secret, until this morning. I didn't know what came over me, but I just _needed_ to let her know. I _needed_ to. And now, I wasn't sure if it was worth it...What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if she hated me because of it? What would happen then?

I guess I'll find out...

**!#$%^**

**Atarah's POV...**

**!#$%**

I scrambled towards the first class of the day; Potions as usual. I just wanted to get away from Draco, whether he was my best friend or not. He held back for a few seconds, and I couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking...but I quickly continued walking. My life was such a mess right now. I mean, could anyone's get any worse than mine? Well, of course they can, but that's not my point. I suppose I should be grateful. I have more than a lot of others. I was rich. I had good looks. I had an awesome best friend. What more could a teenage girl want?

I was about to sit down in my usual spot in Potions, but I decided instead on a table near the back of the cold and dark room. I rested my head on the wooden table and waited for Snape's lesson to begin. I would start paying attention then. I was actually quite good at Potions. It came naturally, so Snape usually gave me some slack in class. I groaned, but it was muffled by the table. Someone sat in the chair beside me, and assuming it was Draco, I stayed silent.

"Does the table taste good?" It was Harry. I could tell without looking up. A smile crept onto my lips.

"Yum. I just _love_ some wood in the morning! Did you know that it's nutritious? It'll help my poor brain out; you should try it." Harry laughed, and I lifted my head from the table to get a better look at him. He was the same as always. I sighed.

"I'm good. Do you mind me sitting here? I-I, um, know you usually sit with Malfoy...but-" He was stuttering again. It was kind of cute- _no, __**not**__ cute. _I just shook my head and smiled.

"No, not at all. It's actually quite nice. I needed a break from him anyways." I said too much. Harry suddenly froze beside me.

"Yeah. About that. I just have to ask you one question, wh-" Potter stopped as Snape glared at him.

"No talking when class has started. Ten points from Gryffindor." People hadn't noticed us before, as they were probably zoning out, but as Snape punished Harry it drew everyone's attention to us. Of course there were stares. Maybe a couple of gasps from the Slytherins. Most of the Gryffindor's were in the D.A. and had already seen us holding hands, but they still had looks of disapproval on their unkind faces.

"And Slytherin. I was talking too, sir." I smirked at Snape as his eyes widened in surprise, but he quickly recovered.

"Yes, I suppose you are...correct, Miss Manston. Now, Potter, can you tell me what the two major ingredients of the Draught of Peace are, or are you unable to even do that?" Snape drawled at him. Harry looked confused, as was everyone else. Snape _was_ being unfair, as we haven't began studying the Draught of Peace yet. I sighed and spoke up, defending Harry yet again.

"The two major ingredients are powdered moonstone and hellebore, professor." I smiled at Harry and he mouthed a thank you in return.

"Correct...though next time I would hope Potter would be able to answer for himself, Miss Manston." He returned to the front of the classroom and our conversation was postponed for now.

**!#$%^**

"Harry, no! You're not supposed to add the pomegranate juice until _after_ the salamander's blood!" I quickly grabbed his hand before he could ruin our strengthening solution. He grimaced and put the container of juice down. I shook my head and smiled at him.

"You know, I don't know if anyone's _ever_ been this bad at potions before. Well, besides Ron and Longbottom, that is..." I joked.

"Since when have you and Ron called each other by your first names?" He questioned curiously, probably because the last time he saw us talk to each other was the time I almost punched him. I shrugged.

"He apologized. A four worded one, if I remember correctly. I apologized as well, after that. Mine was longer. And better. Same meaning, though. At least we're civil to each other, right?" I said as I stirred our potion to perfection. Harry shrugged and continued observing my potion skills.

"We need to be partners more often. Maybe then I can actually keep my dreams of being an Auror." I turned to look at him.

"You want to be an Auror?" Interesting. He shrugged once again.

"Yeah, I mean, what else would I do?" I guess that made sense. He _is_ the Boy-Who-Lived after all. I returned to my potion, and lost myself in the dark red.

"What do _you_ want to do? When you're older?" The question caught me by surprise. What did I want to do? I guess I'd never really thought about it before. I suppose I _had_ to get a job sooner or later, right?

"Um...well, I'd never thought about it before. I get Outstandings in every class, so I guess I qualify for anything, I guess." I shrugged while stirring. I _had_ to get Outstandings, or else I would have to face my parent's wraith.

"You get _all_ Outstandings? Wow...I need to study with _you_. Not even Hermione gets all Outstandings. You actually _beat_ her! Again, I'm studying with you. No questions asked." He laughed, but soon quieted down after Snape sent a glare in our direction. I continued with his question.

"Well, I guess the only thing I would be interested in would be to become a teacher here. It's my home, so I guess it makes sense." That was the only thing I could picture myself doing. I couldn't be an Auror, well...because of my family. You know, the whole Death Eater thing. probably wouldn't be so good...

"You'd make a good teacher. As long as you don't have a melt down and punch one of your students. That'd be _bad_. Oh, you could be the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher! You're awesome at the subject, and technically you're _already_ teaching it. If Umbridge can be a teacher, _you_ can." Harry smiled. he was so swe-_no._ I sighed. This internal battle was becoming exhausting. _There shouldn't __**be**__a battle, Atarah..._so true.

"What about you?" I prodded him. "You could be a better DADA teacher. You're the bloody Boy-Who-Lived! Have you ever thought about that?" I asked curiously. He could be a good teacher. He grimaced.

"You know, I _hate_ those names." He was frowning; I could see what he meant.

"But other than that, I've never thought about it before. I suppose it could be a possibility; if I even survive the war." I stopped stirring and turned towards him. With my hands on my hips, I frowned at him.

"Harry Something Potter. Don't know you're middle name but still. Don't you _dare _think like that." I scolded him, and he returned it with a smirk.

"James. My middle name is James. Just asking, but what's yours?" I rolled his eyes at his attempt to change the subject, but answered anyways.

"Lily." Just then it hit me. Lily was his mother's name right? I'm guessing, yes, from Harry's face.

"L-lily?" What's more interesting is his middle name was James and mine was Lily. James and Lily. Hmmm...well, I-I have others. And he doesn't, so it doesn't mean anything. But it was _still_ a weird coincidence.

"Well, I have others, I just use Lily. My full name is Atarah Lily Serena Natalie Manston. I guess my parent wanted to go above and beyond with naming their daughters. Rose had fou-" Bloody _hell_. I said too much. I quickly picked the spoon back up and continued stirring the red potion. Harry obviously didn't pick up on my unwillingness to share anything about Rose.

"You have a sister? I didn't know that. Rose, you say? How old is she?" I didn't answer, and added another ingredient. He gently held my hand back before I could add more.

"Atarah?" I tried to pull my hand away from his grasp, but he didn't let go. I pulled harder.

"Harry, I need to add this ingredient! Please!" He still didn't let go. His bloody green eyes were full of concern as he stared at me.

"Atarah, are you okay?" His actions were admirable, but he failed to realize that I really _did_ need to fix the potion.

"Harry, _please let me go!_ The potion is GOING TO-" My warning was cut off as the potion exploded. The cauldron and _everything_ exploded. The potion we were making was extremely dangerous, and I expected to be burned alive, but Harry pulled me behind him; shielding me from the blast. I was shocked. But not shocked enough to notice something was deadly wrong. Harry lay on the floor, motionless, his face burned severely. There was a large gash on his cheek where a cauldron fragment must have cut him in the explosion.

I froze for a fraction of a second, before jumping into action. Before anyone had fully registered the fact that an explosion had happened, I was already out the door; dragging Harry with me. Realizing this wasn't working, I cast a levitation spell on him and started running. Running faster than I ever have. Adrenaline rushed through me, and I forced myself not to panic as I headed towards the Hospital Wing. Why did it have to be so bloody far away? _What are you doing! Isn't that what Voldemort wanted in the first place? Harry dead? Leave him!_ The mere thought revolted me. Never. I. Would. Never.

I ran, casting a spell to make me run even faster. Once I finally reached the Hospital Wing, I put Harry down on a bed, staining the white sheets with his blood.

"_MADAM POMFREY! HELP ME; PLEASE!"_ Within two seconds she came barreling out of her office and caught sight of Harry. Immediately she went into action. I was standing by Harry's side, holding onto his hand harder than I thought I could.

"_HARRY! _Oh, Merlin, Merlin, Merlin! _Please!_" I screamed at him. I barely noticed Ron and Hermione come up behind me, gasping for breath. I could hear Hermione sobbing, and Ron chocking at the sight of his best friend lying there, not moving, not giving any sign of life.

"_Please..."_ I was sobbing as well.

Madam Pomfrey ignored us, working intently on Harry. It scared me.

"H-he's g-going to be alright, r-right?" Ron's voice cracked. At this point Dumbledore came rushing in with McGonagall and Snape right behind him. Madam Pomfrey turned to us slowly and spoke grimly.

"I don't know."

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Sooooooo! What do ya think? Suspenseful; what's going to happen next, right? Well, I hope...Anyways! Tell me what you think. In this chapter you got the usual Rayanne's POV, and it showed a little bit of weakness in her. Atarah can kind of relate to her, don't you think, even if she doesn't know it! I added Draco's POV into it as well, don't know how that turned out. Yep, he's definitely going to be a challenge for 'Tara...And of course there's the whole Harry accident. Main part of the chapie, and THERE'S A CLIFFHANGER! Bwahahaha! Lovely evil laugh, don't you think? I say don't you think a lot, don't you think? Lol...so tell me what you think, what you like, what you didn't like, what there should be more of and what should there be less of. I'm open to any suggestions as well. Also any predictions? Go ahead and guess what's going to happen next. I dare you to! Love ya all, my faithful reviewers! o.O**


	11. A Kiss

**A/N: So here's the next chapter, and another thank you to all of you reviewers out there!**

With those three words, my world came crashing down. I sobbed even harder. So much for not getting my heart into this. Hermione cried into Ron's shoulder, holding onto him as I was holding onto Harry.

"What happened?" Dumbledore spoke, the twinkling blue eyes now a sad grey color. He spoke with none of the joy he had in the other times we spoke.

"I don't know, sir. It was too sudden. There was an explosion, and by the time the smoke cleared, Miss Manston was already here with Potter." Snape answered. Dumbledore turned to Ron and Hermione, obviously knowing I couldn't talk right now.

"Did any of you see what happened?" Ron shook his head, still in shock. Hermione couldn't answer. Finally, he knelt to the ground where I was blinded by my tears.

"Atarah, need you to be _strong_. What happened?" He asked dead serious. I cleared my throat, and tried to speak clearly, for Harry.

"H-he was asking me a personal question, I-I didn't w-want to answer so I-I ignored him and focused o-on the p-potion. He h-held onto my wrist, and wouldn't let g-go, b-but I-I _told_ him I-I needed to p-put in an ingredient, but h-he didn't listen. T-the cauldron e-exploded, a-a-and he _shielded_ me...h-h-he took the f-full blast. F-for _me_. I ran straight here. Oh, Merlin, if I-I had _answered_ him, m-maybe h-h-he w-would..." I trailed off, unable to finish. If I had just _answered _him, it was only a _bloody question!_ It was my fault, all my fault...

"Get Miss Granger and Mister Weasley out of here, and get Miss Manston sedated. A Calming Draught, perhaps." Ron and Hermione objected, wanting to be here, no matter what, but were shooed out of the room, escorted to their common room by Professor McGonagall. Snape helped me up and tried to take me to another bed, but I refused to let go of Harry's hand.

"Atarah, stop this childish behavior. Madam Pomfrey needs to help Potter. Let go." He commanded, but I didn't loosen my iron grip on Harry's hand. I couldn't. Snape finally let go and went away, leaving me alone in my pain and worry. My chest hurt from running so fast, and I had a huge headache from crying. But that was _nothing_ compared to Harry.

I was wrong about Snape leaving, for he came back and forced a potion down my throat. Soon...I could feel my consciousness fading away...NO! I need to hold onto Harry! But I was unable to fight the effects of the potion and felt myself drifting into a sleep. But...Harry...

**!#$%^**

"Atarah...I told you! You just couldn't keep your heart out of it, could you?" I recognized Rose's voice, shocking me because of our last conversation. She hadn't visited me in a while. After a second, everything came crashing down on me. Rose's words, Potions, the explosion, Harry...

"Merlin...Rose! I need to get back! Harry..." I was so caught up in the thoughts of the real world that I didn't notice Rose staring at me with sad eyes. Teary eyes. The tears caught my attention.

"Rose...what's the matter?" She just shook her head and turned away from me.

"I can't tell you..." She turned back around abruptly and hugged me tightly. "Oh 'Tara! I can't take it! Seeing you all these times a-a-and k-knowing...Atarah! Why can't you just _really_ accept Dumbledore's offer? Things, things would be _so_ different!" She begged me. I sighed once again.

"Rose...you don't understand. How could you? You're not like me." She pulled away from me.

"What? How could you _say_ that? I'm your _sister_! Of course I'm like you!" She said, not getting what I meant.

"No, you're not. I'm like dad. Like mom. You're not. You're like Grandma." Grandma was never rude to us, the only parenting figure we ever had in our lives. She died shortly after Rose...Mom said it was old age, I said it was heartbreak.

"You're good." She had the heart of a Gryffindor, not Slytherin, that's why...

"B-but what's saying _you_ aren't good? I mean, look at what you've done? Harry probably wouldn't be alive if it weren't for you..." She said more, but it was all lost to me as I thought of Harry...Oh, Merlin...

"Harry! Oh...I have to go back! I have to help! Y-you said he's alright? B-but, I-I could..._do something_!" I closed my eyes, trying to get back...

"I'm the only one who can end the dream, Atarah...I could keep you here for as long as I like. And I _need_ you to _listen_ to me." I opened my eyes and looked at her. She was on her knees beside me, begging me to listen to her. So I did.

"I can't change your mind, but you should at least hear me out." I nodded at her, and she continued. "Use your brains, Atarah. Voldemort's just using your family, what happens when Harry's dead? You're going to be treated just the same then as you will when you stop worshiping him! Once he has power, _everyone's_ going to be an enemy to him, ex-servant or not!"

"I don't worship him!" I defended myself, and pulling on a piece of my blonde hair. Rose was doing the same thing, it was a habit that we shared. She stopped and shook her head.

"'Tara! Stop thinking about hair for just a second and _listen_!" I nodded a second time and she sighed.

"So what's the point in it? And if you join the Order, then you can be _trusted_ and you could defeat Voldemort with Harry! Then you could basically live happily ever after, right?" Sometimes she was just plain silly. I stood up and walked a few feet away from her.

"Rose...I can't change sides, even if I want to. And really? Happily ever after? Where'd you get that?" That was only in-

"The stories you used to tell me. About that girl with the glass slippers, Cinderella, right? And that story about...Snow White...and the dwarf thingies. Yes. The _muggle_ stories." She smiled wryly. I remember those times.

"And when dad found out, remember his face?" I smiled at the memory. "He was so mad, it was almost worth the...well...afterwards." The smile faded off both of our faces. Of course we remember _that_.

"Anyways, what about Draco? And mom and dad, even after what they've done; they're still our parents!" Her face contorted into one of pain.

"Draco...well, m-maybe he'll come with you! And to hell with mom and dad! _What _have they done for us? _What?_" She was only eleven. Eleven and has a grudge. Shouldn't she let go of something that happened so long ago, and do dead people even have feelings? She stood up faster than someone her age should be able to.

"Of course I have feelings! Why else would I visit you? I love you too much!" Her dark hair seemed to glow fiercely in the setting sun.

"Yeah, but come on! You're not even real! You're dead!" My words made even me flinch at the harshness embedded in it. Rose backed off, hurt by my cruel words.

"I may be dead, and I'm pretty sure I'm real, but I sure have feelings. So _go_! _Go off_ and do whatever it is you Death Eaters do! I don't care!" She whipped around, the tips of her hair stinging my face.

"Rose! Pleas-" But my pleading was cut short by the darkness.

**!#$%^**

I sat up and gasped for air. My body felt sore, and my limbs felt heavy, like they weighed a hundred pounds. It took me a second before I realized that I was in the real world again. I jumped out of the bed, only to collapse onto the ground. Trying as hard as I could, I pulled myself off of the floor and dragged myself to Harry's side. The gash on his cheek was healed, leaving a single white scar on his lifeless face. He had bandages all over, and his chest moved slightly up and down as he breathed shallowly.

"MISS MANSTON! _What_ are you doing out of bed, young lady?" Madam Pomfrey rushed out of her small office and to my side. She gently pulled me away from Harry and laid me onto the bed beside him. My blonde hair was messed up and un-brushed.

"Madam Pomfrey, how is he?" I begged her for more information on Harry's condition. But she just shook her head.

"He's stable for now, but he's not getting any better. We're going to send him to St. Mungos to see if they can do anything more for him. As for you, you just need to rest. You should have known better than to cast that spell when you were already exhausted. Using that spell would normally tire you out to the fullest, but since you already ran as fast and as far as you could...let's just say you need rest." So that's why I felt so horrible. Her words gave me _some_ comfort. If he was going to St Mungos they would be able to take care of him, right?

"Where are Ron and Hermione?" They should be here, right? Madam Pomfrey nodded toward the door.

"Waiting. I suppose I should let them see Potter before he goes." With a wave of her wand, the doors opened. Without any hesitation, they rushed in. Only it wasn't just Ron and Hermione, there were more. The twins and Ginny were there, Loony, Longbottom, and a couple other of Gryffindors. Ron and Hermione immediately went to Harry, while the others gave them some room.

Despite Madam Pomfrey's protests, I slowly found my way to their side. He looked so peaceful...but my thoughts were interrupted by something unexpected. Hermione had detached herself from Ron and launched herself at me. Hermione. Granger. Was. Hugging. Me. And I hugged her back.

"Thank you, for what it's worth. Without you, h-he would have surely not made it..." She whispered gratefully to me. She let go and went back to Ron. I dragged myself back to my bed, giving the trio some time alone.

I sighed and sat down.

**!#$%^**

**Harry's POV...**

**!#$%^**

Her eyes widened as she tried to warn me. The cauldron smoked, and I realized what she had meant. I quickly pulled her close to me and turned away from the smoking pot. I didn't have very much time to think, but all I could wonder is why I saved her. Did I do it because that's just who I am, I protect. Harry Potter, the protector. Or did I do it because I couldn't _ever_ let her get hurt. Somehow, I leaned towards the second.

I didn't know why I felt the way I did about her. She was Atarah bloody Manston! The girl who had been my enemy since first year. We were natural enemies, no questions asked. She was as good as Malfoy was. Not to mention she was the daughter of _Death Eaters_. She worshiped Voldemort. She was on the other side. But none of that seemed to matter. It didn't change the way I felt about her.

I held her close to me as the cauldron exploded behind me. My world erupted into pain. I could feel myself slipping...no! I have to stay strong..have to be here for everyone. I could feel someone carry me, and realized it was Atarah, she was trying to save me, and somehow...that gave me all the strength I needed. I could feel the darkness looming over me, like vultures waiting on their prey. But I wouldn't give up. I would fight. I would fight until the end.

"_MADAM POMFREY! HELP ME; PLEASE!_" Her voice was full of pain and sorrow. I tried to let her know that I wasn't giving up, but I couldn't move, couldn't talk, couldn't do _anything_.

"_HARRY! _Oh, Merlin, Merlin, Merlin! _Please!_" She begged, and I longed to let her know that I was here; here and alright. But no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't do more than think.

**!#$%^**

**Atarah's POV...**

**!#$%^**

Soon everyone was forced to leave by Madam Pomfrey, and I was left here in silence. Deafening silence. You know, that phrase has always amused me. I mean, it's silence. It doesn't make a sound! I guess it _does _make sense, though. All you can hear is silence, so it's deafening. I sighed and got out of my bed. It was still exhausting, but I managed to get into the chair besides Harry without collapsing again. I grabbed Harry's hand, which was surprisingly not broken.

"Harry...I-I tried to save you. I _tried_. And now I need you to pull through. And maybe not just for me, but for everyone else. You, you're the Boy-Who-Lived, whether you like it or not, and people are counting on you. No one else is able to do what _you_ can." I laughed softly. "And look at me. I'm on the other side, and I'm asking you to kill the man our family is dedicated to. I'm a mess. I'm also so stupid. I know you probably can't hear me, but hey...at least if I embarrass myself, no one will know." I sighed.

"You know, in first year, I was actually excited to meet you. 'He's _Harry Potter_!' I told myself. You were so famous, I just wanted to _meet you_. But then, well everything changed. Draco hated you, so _I_ hated you. I was sorted into Slytherin, and you were sorted into Gryffindor. Being enemies came natural. And yeah. I really _did_ hate you. With every ounce of my being. But now...well, now I'm not sure about anything. I can honestly say that I don't hate you as much as I did before. You've changed into a-a f-fr-. Ah hell. I'll go ahead and say it." I closed my eyes tightly, wishing my next words were anything but true.

"You're a true friend. There! I said it!" I opened my light green eyes and rolled them. But then I frowned.

"And maybe something more..." I barely whispered. No one heard me, and thank Merlin. _I _didn't even want to hear me. But as horrible as it was, it was the truth.

"Anyways, enough soppy friendship confessions and other _way_ too sweet things. You need to wake up. I _command_ you. Okay? Wow, I'm weird...You really _do_ need to wake up, though. Because I don't know what I'd, I mean, _we'd_ do without you. You're too important to m-us. Ah bloody hell, I don't care. I don't know what _I'd_ do without you. You're way too important to _me_. And we _both_ know how selfish I am. You need to wake up because _I_ want you to. It would suck if you went through all that trouble to save and in the end just leave me here alone. It'd do the opposite of what you'd intended. So _wake_ the _hell_ up, Potter."

I leaned down and kissed him on the lips ever so gently. A single tear leaked out of my eye and fell onto his cold, white cheek. What I didn't expect, though; was to be kissed back. I jerked away from him in surprise; only to see those beautiful green eyes staring back at me.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: So whatcha think? Good, bad? In between? Any predictions? Any suggestions? Any comments? Any anything? My cast hurts...grrrr. Oh well, review please!**


	12. It's a Date

"Hello to you too..." His voice was weak and hoarse, but that didn't matter as I blinked at him in shock. And for several seconds I just sat there, unable to believe my eyes.

"Well, you _commanded_ me to wake up, did you not? I would've thought you'd have been jumping up in joy an-" He was cut off as I engulfed him in a fierce hug. He smiled faintly.

"That works too." He put his arms around me and squeezed gently. Suddenly I pulled back in worry.

"Harry? Harry! _MADAM POMFREY!_" I screamed for her, wanting to make sure he was okay, and _how_ he woke up.

"What child?" She wandered out of her office groggily. It was clear she got no sleep. Even as tired as she was, she immediately jumped into action when she saw Harry. I scrambled franticly beside her.

"What? How? Is he okay? I-Is he better? What's going on!" I nearly screamed into her ears. She pushed me away gently.

"Hush, dear. I you want to make yourself useful, go fetch Miss Granger and Mister Weasley. I'm sure they would want to be here." I nodded and with one last squeeze of Harry's hand, I ran out of the Hospital Wing. Where would they be? What time is it? I saw Loony standing with a group of Ravenclaws in a corner. I ran up to her and grabbed her shoulders tightly.

"Luna, do you know where Ron and Hermione are?" I was practically shaking her. But she just smiled at me and pointed to her left.

"I saw them go off that way. The-" But I was already on my way. I ran off 'that way'. I could faintly hear Luna warning me of nargles. What are nargles? Oh well. I saw Ginny with Michael Corner and stopped.

"Do you know where Ron and Hermione are?" I asked, feeling drained. She pointed hesitantly to her left.

"They just turned around the corner." She looked confused that I was even speaking to her. I nodded in approval and took off once again. And nearly ran into them.

"Atarah?" Hermione said softly. I held up I hand and signaled for them to wait. I kneeled over and gasped for breath.

"M-Merlin! You two are hard to find..." They were confused, their faces clearly stated. I sighed.

"It's Harry. He's awake." And without any further explanation, we _all_ took off, trying to get to Harry faster. We burst through the doors with such force, you'd think we had broken it down. I immediately went back to my spot at Harry's side. He smiled at me again. Dumbledore and the professors had come and were discussing something in a group.

"Blimey, Harry. You gave us quite a scare, mate." Ron smiled. Hermione laughed softly. Harry's smile brightened at the sight of his two best friends.

"You're never partnering with me in Potions again." I smirked at him. His green eyes met mine and for just a second; everything melted away. Everything just..._floated_ away, leaving just Harry.

"I can deal with that." I turned to Madam Pomfrey, who was keeping an eye on Harry and listening to the teachers speak at the same time.

"Madam, do you know why he got better all of a sudden?" I was curious as to why he woke up right when he did. But she just shook her head and turned back to the professors.

"Harry, are you sure you're alright? They were going to send you to St. Mungos, that's how bad it was. And some people...well, some people didn't think you'd make it." Hermione fussed over her best friend. I stood up slowly from my chair and started to walk away. I mean, they were the _trio_. Makes sense to give them some time alone. Before I could get very far, however, a hand stopped me. But it wasn't Harry; it was Hermione. She smiled at me and motioned me back.

I hesitated for a few seconds, then walked to Harry's side once again. The simple act of them letting me stay...made me feel...weird. It was definitely an unknown feeling. I felt that, for _once_ in my life...I belonged.

**!#$%^**

**Rayanne Manston's POV...**

**!#$%^**

Rayanne Manston stood alone in her lush garden. The garden was filled with color, bright and alive with all the brilliance of the world. And yet; she didn't notice the rose bushes that were just now blooming. She didn't notice the patch of lilies that she had planted years earlier. An entire world away from troubles, yet she only had eyes for a bench. A hard, cold, _stone_ bench. People might have called her crazy, but she was attached to that bench. Whether in a _good_ way, or a _bad_; was unknown. It was the bench she was sitting on when Liam Manston had asked for her hand in marriage.

She had been ecstatic. No longer would she be Rayanne Fremont, now she would be Rayanne _Manston_. At the time it was a dream come true; Liam was everything she wanted in a man. He was a true gentleman. And now, as she stared at the stone bench longingly, she wished she could go back in time. Things could have been so different had Voldemort not ruined everything. Rayanne shook her head fiercely, riding herself of such thoughts. The Dark Lord was her master, and it would always be that way.

Yet she could not escape the ideas in her head, even while looking down at the dark mark inked into her left arm. _This_ was her life now. She had chosen to follow her husband, and there was no changing that now.

**!#$%^**

**Atarah Manston's POV...**

**!#$%^**

After hours of sitting and discussing Harry's condition, the teachers finally left the Hospital Wing, leaving the four of us alone. Well, not alone. We had each other.

Hermione suddenly jumped up, as if she had forgotten something. She pulled two envelopes out of her pocket.

"These are for you two." She handed us the letters. She directed her next words to me. "It was strange; I didn't expect your owl to come to _me_ for _your_ letter." I was curious as well. Why didn't my owl just go to Draco? Speaking of Draco, I had half expected him to come visit me.

"Harry's only been unconscious for a day, right? How do people already know about his condition?" I asked. Ron and Hermione shared a look that said I didn't know all of the story. Ron shrugged.

"Well, not quite. It's been a bit longer than a day. You see, the medicine Madam Pomfrey gave you made you sleep for...well, _not_ a day." It was a lame sentence, but it was enough. I thought back to the medincine I was given earlier. I exceled in Potions for a reason. In order to undo te damage the spell I had casted, the potion had to be strong...

"I've been out for two weeks?" That's a bloody long time! But Ron and Hermione just nodded, confirming my guess. But that means...

"Christmas is only a few weeks away!" It was random, I must admit. But Hermione smiled and nodded. It was then I realized I still had a letter in my hands. I sighed and ripped it open.

_My dearest Atarah,_

_I have heard about the accident. The Dark Lord is pleased. Any way this ends up; it is good for us. If the boy dies then it is a great victory for us. If he lives, he will grow ever more attached to you; seeing as you saved him. On that subject, the boy will most likely live. He's the-Boy-Who-Lived; he will get the best treatment our wizarding world has to offer. Anyways, it is about time for you to send us a report. I shall expect one every two weeks. Is that clear? If you are late for one you shall be punished. If it has information that isn't useful, you shall be punished. The newspaper said you were injured as well. Heal quickly and be safe._

_ Your mother,_

_ Rayanne Manston_

It suddenly dawned on me that I still had to spy on Harry. And I didn't want to. I wiped the frown off of my face and tried to be cheerful. I looked over at Harry, who was still reading. After a few minutes, he smiled and folded the paper. At least one of us was happy.

"Who's it from?" I asked nosily. His smile turned into a conflicted grimace. He obviously didn't know if he should tell me. He looked up at his two best friends.

"It's from Padfoot." Padfoot? Who was Padfoot? It was a nickname, I was sure. After a moment of silence, he finally spoke to me.

"I can trust you. It's a letter from my godfather. Sirius." Wait, I'd heard that name before. And not just in the newspapers, either. I'd heard it from my parents.

"Sirius _Black_ is your godfather?" That was something I didn't know. Hmm... Harry opened his mouth, obviously to defend his family; but I quickly cut him off.

"Yeah, I know he's innocent. And I know he's not responsible for all the recent disappearances. Death Eater family, remember?" I joked. It wasn't very funny. I sighed and looked back down at my letter.

"Who's your letter from?" I didn't want to lie to him, but I couldn't exactly tell him the whole truth either. I groaned.

"My mum." I frowned. "Nothing big. Just the usual 'Don't disappoint me' stuff." I said truthfully. I wasn't lying, just not telling him everything. _Big_ difference. He nodded slowly and I smiled at him. He returned it with an adorable smile of his own. And for the second time today, I was lost in his eyes.

"Come on Ron..." Hermione dragged him out of the room. I took Harry's hand and squeezed gently.

"So." I whispered. I had basically told him my feelings by kissing him, and somehow I was still confused. Where do we go from here?

"So." His eyes were still locked with mine. I sighed and looked away.

"What happens next?" The question was packed with many emotions. And it was nearly impossible to answer.

"I don't know." He sat up, despite my protests. He took a deep breath before speaking.

"I don't know much of anything, really. I haven't for a while now. One minute it's normal; I hate you, you hate me. Easy. But then...then _everything_ changes. I can see more of who you _really_ are. Even if it's not all that clear. I can see that you aren't who I thought you were. You're different. In a good way..I mean. And, well...I'm not sure now. About anything. And I just don't...I can't...well...I, oh Merlin." He groaned in frustration and looked up at the ceiling.

"I guess what I'm trying to ask is...will you go to Hogsmeade with me?" I had to laugh at that. I nodded and smiled brightly at him.

"Yes, Potter. I'd _love_ to go out with you."

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for such a long wait! This chapter isn't really that exciting, but hey- I'm tired today. Soo, I was thinking of doing another story (don't worry I'd update this as quickly as ever), and I would love to know what you'd like to see me write. I was thinking of doing one set in 4th year, or one in 7th, or even one throughout all the years, but I'd like your opinion. Tell me the pairing you'd like and setting and etc. I need help. Or if you don't want me to do another one at all; I'm cool with that as well. Let me know ;)**


	13. My Rose

But due to Harry's condition, our date would have to wait until he was fully recovered. Over the next few days, he soon regained the strength he had lost in the explosion. He was still weak, but all that really mattered to me was that he was _alive_.

I was at Harry's side, a place I virtually never left. I held a blank piece of paper in my hand, try8ing to start the letter to my mother. Inside, I was as conflicted as always. What should I write? Should I tell the truth? Should I make it up? I groaned.

_Dear Mother,_

_I am pleased to inform you that my mission is going well. I have successfully managed to fool Potter and his friends; it was pitifully easy to do so. As you have correctly guessed, Potter has lived and is set to be back in classes tomorrow. I __do__, however have __some__ news. Potter has not grown attached enough to me to fully indulge any useful information, but he __has__ said some._

_ Our only personal conversation thus far has been about his godfather; Sirius Black. It is quite evident Black means the world to Potter._

It was true. Harry and I had had several chats about Sirius. It was repulsive of me to tell this to my mother, but it was either this or tell her about the D.A.

_I will set to work immediately in order to gain Potter's trust. I will not fail you, Mother. Speaking of trust, I do believe I have gained Dumbledore's. Weeks before my mission had been created, he had offered me something. Protection. I had refused, of course, making silly excuses. Upon learning of my assignment, I thought it best to...agree. This will enable me to not only learn Potter's secrets, but the Orders as well. Trust me mother. TI suggest you tell the others, I am sure they would like to be informed._

_ With love,_

_ Atarah Manston_

I groaned. I folded the paper until it was small enough to fit into my pocket. I sighed and put my head in my hands; I was lost. Lost in my feelings for Harry and my lost in my loyalty. Who _really_ had it?

"Trouble with your mum again?" A voice called out from behind me. I whipped around to find Ron smiling at me. I did a weird half smile and nodded slightly at him. He grabbed a chair from a nearby bed and sat down beside me. His red hair fell in front of his eyes, but he didn't bother to fix it.

"You do realize that he's my best mate, right?" He didn't look over at me, but I still nodded anyways. I had no idea where he was going with this.

"I've seen the way he looks at you. I don't understand _why_, but he cares about you. A lot." Only now did he turn to look at me. His brown eyes sparkled dangerously.

"You're a Slytherin. You're cruel. And I don't want him to get hurt. So I _have_ to ask. Do you really care about him? Or are you just playing one of your sick games?" His piercing gaze made me fidget. Somehow I respected him for doing this. I knew the answer, I but I didn't want to admit it. I knew I had to.

"I didn't want to. I _am_ a Slytherin. I _am_ cruel. I'm not _good_ enough for him, literally. But, yes. I do care about him. A hell of a great deal." He nodded, apparently satisfied, and finally pulled his hair out of his face. He leaned back in his chair.

"Just know this know. If you hurt him, I will..." He had trouble finding the right words. I helped.

"Seriously injure me? Make my life a living hell? Curse my family? Hmmm...what's another?" I mused. he laughed, but then turned grim.

"I am being serious. If you hurt him, I will make you regret it." He was actually intimidating. Weasel. _Intimidating._ Just then Harry started to stir. I stood and started to leave.

"Understood, Weasel. Take care of him, will you? Got to go send this off." I nodded my head towards the letter. I smiled at him and left.

**!#$%^**

I was walking the treacherous stairs (Merlin! have I told you how much I hate stairs?) to the owlry when a noise startled me. I turned around and came face to face with a pair of dark grey eyes. I clasped my hands over my mouth to stop myself from screaming. My heart raced and I took a quick, deep breath, but it didn't help. Draco hadn't moved.

"Draco! Merlin...You scared me!" I attempted to smile, but my mouth wouldn't cooperate.

"I haven't seen you in a while." His voice was guarded, and I couldn't help but feel guilty. I had spent all my time with harry nowadays and I hadn't talked to Draco since before the explosion. Holy hell! I hadn't talked to him for over two weeks.

"Merlin! Oh, gosh! Draco! I-I, I'm so _sorry_!" How could I be this bad of a friend? He's been with me since I was _three_! Oh, gosh...

"I had a dream about Rose last night." I was a horrible friend...I was a horrible friend...I was a horrible friend...wait! What?

"_What! _I-I mean, what?" I tried to control my voice, failing miserably. I hadn't had a dream about her since she had left. But, what were the odds that she visited Draco too? Oh, Merlin; I was crazy. My sister was _dead_. D-E-A-D. I had dreams about her as my way of grieving. The dreams weren't _actually_ real; but if that were true, why couldn't I stop myself from wanting to hear more?

"Of course, I could very well be crazy...But in the dream we...talked. _I_ think it was real. She even gave me a message for you." A chill went up my spine. "She told me to warn you. That's all she said." _He_ thought it was real. But what if it was? It's impossible! Draco shook his blonde head.

"Anyways, I came here to send something to my dear old father. He brushed past me and continued up the stairs. After a second of hesitation, I followed silently behind him. I looked over the room quickly and found the family owl. _Zoosh_. That wasn't his real name of course, but that's the name Rose had adopted for him. His "official" name was _Borr,_ but that just sounded _weird_. He was a very...proud bird. I _hated_ him.

"You, _bird!_ Come here!" It refused to budge. " Zoosh, please?" It still didn't move. I sighed and walked over to him myself. I gave him the letter, and he pecked me before taking it.

"Ow! You little-Oh _fine_. Take this to my mum." I groaned when Zoosh turned his head.

"To my mum, _please._" I swear, that bird scoffed before flying out of the window.

"Ah, you _always_ had a way with Borr...I remember the time when you put a dress on him." Draco smirked. I laughed.

"Yeah, after that he wouldn't come near me for _months_. Add to that my parents...weren't _too _happy with me." I rolled my eyes and pulled my blonde hair into a high ponytail.

"So. You still in Umbridge's little gang?" I asked. I still didn't know why he stood by that...that...bi-

"Yes. and about that. Potter's grown somewhat attached you, hasn't he?" I swear I saw a flash of jealousy in his cold eyes.

"I was wondering if he mentioned something about some sort of gathering or club on the seventh floor. Probably a damn fan club." He scoffed, much like Zoosh had earlier. It took me a second to realize that he was talking about the D.A. I lied quickly.

"Nope. At least, he hasn't mentioned anything to _me_ yet. Why?" I tried to sound innocent. Draco shook his head and muttered quiet never mind. He stood looking out the window, his face void of all emotion.

"So...The holidays are coming up rather quick, don't you think?" It was the lamest to break a silence _ever_, but it worked. Draco let out a small chuckle and started to walk out f the room.

"Yeah. I suppose they are."

**!#$%^**

Harry was set to be out of the Hospital Wing tonight, and I wanted to be there when he could leave. I slowly made my way there, taking my time and not wanting to rush. There was another D.A. meeting today, and hopefully Harry would be there to lead it.

I stepped into the Hospital Wing to find Hermione and Ron already there. Harry was arguing with Madam Pomfrey.

"You should stay just a _little_ longer, Potter." She was trying to convince Harry to stay, obviously worried about his health. But, being his normal self; he refused.

"I'm _fine_. Really!" She shook her head at him, but smiled despite herself.

"_Just_ like your father. James practically lived here, he got into so many duels. Stubborn, that boy was. Something he passed onto _you_, I see. Alright Potter, you're free to go." She laughed at how quickly he jumped out of the bed. I couldn't help but join in. Harry gave Ron one of the those one-armed-guy-hug things, and Hermione launched herself at him.

"Ready for the D.A. Harry?" I asked with a smile on my face. He looked worried.

"Oh, yeah! I've been out for so long...How're they doing? Have they-"

"You'll see..." The four of us walked together to the meeting.

**!#$%^**

We entered the room to find them already practicing. Neville was _still_ trying to disarm someone, although he'd gotten better, he has yet to master that spell. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked up at Harry. There was several seconds of heavy silence. Sighing, I stated to clap. They needed no further encouragement, and the entire room burst into applause. Harry looked like he wanted us to stop, but I shook my head at him. He was too modest.

"Oh, erm; thanks." was all he could come up with after the clapping stopped. I smirked.

"Well the. Let's show him what we've been doing!"

**!#$%^**

It was actually impressive, everyone was doing extraordinarily well. We had people in pairs, practicing several different spells. What _really_ caught everyone's attention was when Neville _disarmed_ his opponent. There was gasps from around the room, an soon enough he was surrounded by people. I couldn't help but be one of them.

"Well done Neville. I _knew_ you had it in you." He actually smiled when I said his first name. I nodded at him, then moved to the other side of the room, away room everyone.

The rest of the practice went well. people laughed and smiled. They had _fun_. I, along with everyone else, didn't want the day to end. But soon enough, it was time to leave. I let Harry deal with the speech this time and walked to the mirror at the back of the room. There was a photo of Cedric Diggory taped to it.

I hadn't really known Cedric. Yeah, I had to admit, I had noticed him. What girl hadn't. He was hot. But he wasn't my type. Not to mention he was _way_ too old. Only two years, but still. I was still affected by his death. Well, maybe not his death so much, but the fact that Voldemort had returned. The fact that my world had been changed forever. I closed my eyes and sighed. Well, there was nothing I could do about it now. I felt a tear fall down from my light green eyes.

"Atarah?" I quickly wiped my eyes and turned to find Harry behind me. The rest of the classroom was empty, except for Fred and George, who were winking at me as they exited.

"Are you alright?"His voice was filled with such concern...I nodded.

"Yeah. I'll be alright." I looked back at the mirror. Harry's hand pulled on mine.

"I don't think you are. Will you tell me?" Merlin those eyes...I smirked softly and laughed.

"Alright. But only because of that adorable pouting face your making." I sighed. I might as well tell him. It may even make me feel better. Who knows.

"Alright. You asked me earlier about my sister, right? Well, as you could tell, I have a _sister_! Hey, surprise, right?" I joked. "Well, her name was Rose. She was the bubbliest thing on this planet. No way in _hell_ would she be in Slytherin." I laughed. "She was seven...anyways. She was kind and bright and loving, and...well, she was _Rose_. I was inspired by her. I believed that there was good on this world. Until one day...

**!#$%^**

_ "Rose!" I yelled at her. But she ignored me as she ran to the alley. A __**muggle**__alley. We were trying to do some shopping in Diagon Alley, but she had heard a noise in one of London's dark creepy places. I ran after her, knowing our parents would kill us if they knew what she was doing. I stopped when I saw her leaning over a limp body._

_ "'Tara! He's still breathing! We have to get him to a Hospital!" She motioned me over. I didn't come, and glanced around. Our parent were going to literally __**kill**__ us!_

_ "Rose! Listen to me! It's a muggle Rose! A __**muggle**__! Let's go, whatever pain he's in, he probably deserved it! Let's go!" I pulled on her arm, but she refused to budge. She glared up at me._

_ "He's a human being. Just like us. And I'm going to help him, whether you like it or not!" Her eyes seemed to catch fire, they were so fierce. I glanced around one more time, making sure no one could see us._

_ "Alright. If I help, will you stop this foolish behavior?" Rose nodded and stepped aside. I examined the man. He appeared to have been in a pub fight, or some kind of violence like that. Muggle violence. I would __**never**__ understand it. I felt for a pulse, and found it. It was shallow, but there._

_ I took a deep breath, before muttering a spell I had learned from my mother, using the wand I had gotten, as I was starting Hogwarts soon. The man moaned and started to stir._

_ "There, are you happy Rose? Let's go, before someon-" But I was cut off as she suddenly pushed me out of the way and crouched over the man._

_ "What the he-" I started to scold her, but stopped as my blood went cold. Our father stood at the entrance to the alley. His face...his face was unbearably cold. He strode over to Rose, kicking me in the stomach as he went. I gasped, but my fear for Rose overwhelmed the pain._

_ He cast a spell around the area, probably to muffle our screams. My guess was proven right._

_ "Crucio!" Rose's screams drowned out any of my thoughts. Her pain...it was horrible..._

_ "You filthy blood traitor! You had everything! You had the perfect family, __**everything**__! How __**dare**__ you insult us this way!" His cruel voice chilled me to the bone. I dropped to the floor and held her in my arms._

_ "Stop! Stop! __**Please**__!" My screams joined Rose's. She was just a little girl! He halted for a portion of a second, his humanity breaking through. Rose sat, huffing. She slowly sat up, with strength not expected from a seven year old. She opened her mouth, as if to speak...and spat. The look on her face was pure hatred, but it changed as she looked to me._

_ "I love y-"_

_ "__**Avada Kedavra**__**!**__"_

**!#$%^**

Tears blurred my vision as I spoke. I didn't bother to wipe them away, and lowered my head.

"So there it is. The story of how my seven year old sister died in my arms." Harry was paralyzed, and he couldn't speak.

"Don't bother with sympathies, they're useless. Just hug me, please..." I laughed slightly as he engulfed me into a hug. It felt nice. I sighed. It _did_ feel nice to get it out. I slipped out of Harry's embrace and shrugged.

"Alrighty. I think it's time to end all the sob stories and stuff before something bad happens. Like me actually getting a heart!" Harry still didn't say anything, just stood there, looking up.

"Well? Are you going to say anything?" I glanced towards the spot he was staring at, to find a branch of mistletoe. Mistletoe...I grinned at him.

"What are you waiting for? This is the part where you sweep me into your arms, hold me close and whisper sweet nothings in my ear, then lean down for a passionate kiss. So?" I smirked, joking.

"Okay." And he kissed me.

**!#$%^**

**A/N: Hey, sorry for the wait, had some family problems. Anyways, just wanted to thank all of my reviewers. Don't forget to check out my poll and the banner for this story on my profile. I also dedicate this story to my little sis, Megan Renee M. Rose's character is based off of her so...yeah. I miss ya baby girl! She died on August 8, 2007. She was run over by a car, and died in front of me. I just want to let everyone know, she's the real reason for me living. She's the motivation behind all of my stories and ideas! Sorry if that's a little bit creepy, but it's true. 2/16/02 - 8/8/07**


	14. It's Complicated

I have never felt like this before. I was walking slowly down the corridors with an enormous grin on my face. I was happy. For once in my life; happy. _Harry_ had made me happy. I felt...bubbly, in a way. I smiled once again, and laughed. It was late at night and I should have been asleep, but I couldn't stop thinking about the kiss. I had been kidding before, but when he had kissed me; everything floated away. Then there was bliss. Pure bliss. It sounds stupid when I say it out loud, but in that moment it just felt...right, in a way. Like this was _supposed_ to happen. I laughed.

And so I was still grinning when an owl landed in front of me. An _owl_? At this hour? What? I knelt down to see that it was Zoosh. But-why? I took the envelope from his beak and ripped it open.

_Dearest Daughter,_

_I trust you will have better information in the future, but we will be able to put what little you have found out to use. Onto the next subject. Dumbledore, and this little...deal you have made with him. I for one, think it is a wonderful idea. Well, only if good information comes from it. Anyways, there is more important news to attend to. Your father and I are coming to Hogwarts. Just to visit you, my dear. We have already informed Dumbledore of it and we expect you to be prepared._

_ With Love,_

_ Atarah Manson_

_ P.S._

_Do...take care of yourself._

I shook my head. My parents...coming...to Hogwarts. This, this couldn't be right! No, it just can't! Are they even allowed to? Well, of course they can; they're Liam and Rayanne bloody Manston. I shook my head once again in disbelief, and sank to the floor. Why were they coming, it couldn't just be to visit me like they had said. Are they going to try to kill Harry? No, they wouldn't, Voldemort wouldn't allow it. I put my head in my hands. All the joy that had filled me just mere seconds ago had abandoned me. I don't know how long I sat there, trying to figure out what to do, when a sudden noise startled me.

I quickly stood and listened harder. Yes, they were getting louder. I was deciding what to do when people turned around the corner. It was Harry, Ron...and McGonagall? Harry was breathing hard and just stared forewords, not saying anything. I rushed to their side.

"Oh, Miss Manston, you should be in bed, go!" She tried to shoo me, but Ron shook his head.

"Ron? W-What's going on?" I looked back and forth between Harry's distant look and McGonagall's worried one. But he only shook his head..

"Don't know. He was thrashing about in his sleep. Says, well, he said he saw...my dad. But it was only a-"

"It wasn't a dream, Ron! Why won't anyone believe me? Your dad, I-I saw him!" Harry turned to his friend. The look on his face, that look of concern for Mr. Weasley, it won me over.

"What happened?"  
I asked, and he sighed in relief. On our way to Dumbledore's office, he filled me in on his vision. The snake...I had seen the snake he had described before. It was Nagini, I was sure of it. And that meant that Voldemort had sent her after him. Why? Harry has said that Mr. Weasley was looking for something when he was attacked, but _what_?

At that moment we arrived at Dumbledore's office. He immediately jumped up, and Harry filled him in on his vision. Dumbledore's expression was unreadable as he listened. He seemed, to almost...ignore Harry. He didn't look him in the eye and he ran around the room talking to the portraits. I could see Harry growing impatient. His fists balled up tightly, and his eyes seemed to turn...red. W-what? I quickly stepped in front of him before he did anything rash.

"Sir, what does it mean? Is he going to be okay?" The rest of the Weasley children filed in, their faces filled with fear and concern for their father. Dumbledore had said a few words to a portrait, and a few minutes later the man in it came back with news.

"They found him. He doesn't look too good, Dumbledore." He nodded, then turned to us. I-I actually found myself...worrying. The last time I saw him was at the beginning of my second year at Gilderoy Lockhart's signing event. I'm sure he doesn't have very many _good_ memories about me. I sighed.

There was too much going on. My parents coming to visit, my mission, Mr. Weasley. Suddenly, they were pushing down on me. I hadn't been thinking about them before, but now they were _all_ I could think of.

I gasped, and feel to my knees. It was...pushing...on me. Crushing my heart into pieces...

"Atarah!" I feel Harry holding me, shaking me...I looked up into his green eyes. Those eyes...I _loved_ those eyes, they were too beautiful. And suddenly I was sucked into my memories, of Harry and I laughing at something, of the DA, of everything..._happy._ Except, it was painful...I gasped and slumped to the ground unconscious.

**!#$%^**

I woke up in a strange place. It wasn't familiar to me as I sat up slowly. I was in an uncomfortable chair, and I quickly stood. There was silence, except for a few sounds of chairs being moved. I walked towards the noises, and through a doorway to find everyone sitting at a table.

"Harry?" He looked like he got no sleep, along with everyone else. Ron was actually asleep, though, so I guess not _everyone_. harry stood up quickly and rushed over to my side.

"Are you okay?" I nodded and was about to say something more when someone else caught my attention. Sirius Black. My eyes widened as I stared at him. He smirked a smirk that I knew very well. It ran through the Black family.

"Atarah Manston." He said as he walked towards me. I found myself automatically stepping back a few steps. He laughed.

"I've heard a lot about you." He looked me up and down and sighed. "You look just like your mother; I'm not sure if that's a good thing." I got a sudden feeling he didn't like me. I backed into Harry.

"I haven't seen you since you were a baby. How's the family been?" He was hitting a dangerous topic.

"Sirius. You can trust her." Harry held onto my shoulders. Sirius looked shocked and raised an eyebrow.

"Is this not the Atarah Manston you've spoke of _many_ times? Draco _Malfoy's_ best friend?" I could easily tell he didn't trust me. Ron stood up, apparently he had woken up.

"I can vouch for her; she's cool." I snorted, but smiled at him. He was such an idiot. I twitched as Sirius scrutinized me. Finally he shook his head.

"Alright. If you kids say so." I couldn't help but let out a sigh when he turned away from me. Harry chuckled softly.

"He doesn't bite, you know." I nodded, then remembered something.

"What about Mr. Weasley?" That sobered everyone up, and Harry's smile fell. How long have I been out?

"We're still waiting. He's been sent to St. Mungos, but it'd be too suspicious to show up when we're not supposed to know." Sirius answered. I nodded. The Weasley's didn't look too happy about waiting, but what could they do? A question suddenly popped into my head.

"What happened to me?" Harry frowned

"Well, you kind of fainted...we don't know why." I raised my eyebrows. I remembered now. About the memories that had flooded through my head. I sighed. This was too much. I leaned back into Harry and groaned.

"Harry, I should probably tell you now, before anything else. My parents are coming to visit." I could feel his body tensing, and Sirius dropped a plate he was holding. Damn.

"To Hogwarts? Rayanne?" A spark lit up in his eyes, and I couldn't help but be curious. I nodded slowly.

"And my dad. I don't know when, but I'm guessing in only a few days. I don't know what to do..." Harry wrapped his arms around me gently. I sighed.

"Oi'! Get a room you two!" Ron threw a piece of whatever food he was eating at us. I smirked at him.

"Oh, shut it. You're just jealous." He scoffed and laughed.

"Of _you_?" I turned around.

"You're just jealous you can't hold Hermione like this." I almost felt sorry for him as his ears went red. Everyone fell over laughing; we all knew they liked each other. They just wouldn't admit it. Ron lowered his head and sat back down. He was lucky Hermione wasn't in the room.

" I don't know what you're talking about..." That caused us to laugh even more. Everyone but _Sirius_ was laughing, and I couldn't help but once again feel curious. I quickly shook it off as Hermione walked back in.

"What did I miss?" She looked back and forth between everyone, who just laughed even harder. I sighed.

"Well, guys, I know you don't want to hear this, but you need some sleep. Ron here already got some, but staying up isn't going to help." I said as I walked out the door. I was going back to sleep. I was just about to sit down, when a hand stopped me. It was Sirius. I looked down quickly.

"Hey, I um, err, just wanted to apologize for being rude before. It was, I just, Harry's said bad things about you before, stuff that obviously isn't true. Like I said before, I was just being protective of my godson. He's the only thing I have left, you know. And I guess..." He sighed.

"You have to protect what you love." We both said at the same time. His eyes widened in shock, but quickly nodded.

"Yes. That's exactly what I'm trying to say. Here, sit." He motioned towards the chair opposite the one I has been sleeping on before. We both sat.

"So, I've noticed that you and Harry are close." My face grew red, and lowered my head. Sirius smiled.

"You got that from your mother. She would _always_ blush, right before lowering her head as if she did something bad. I never understood it." My head shot up.

"Y-you knew my mum?" But, why...how? He nodded.

"Yes. I did know her. She was Narcissa's best friend at Hogwarts. I knew her very well. I could even consider her a _friend_. Of course, she didn't let anyone know that, seeing as she was a Slytherin and I was a Gryffindor. We were good friends until she met that _Manston _boy." My eyes widened and I could only stare in shock at him. Was he..._jealous_? No no no no no! Sirius Black liked my mum! I couldn't believe it!

"Err..." I didn't trust myself to say anything else. He finally looked up at me. It was then I noticed his eyes. His grey eyes. Suddenly, I remembered my mother. She had been trimming her garden once, and she had mentioned grey eyes, and how much she loved them. My mum fancied Sirius! Oh, Merlin.

"Err, I-I need to, err, go to the...bathroom." I rushed out of the room quickly. It shouldn't have been such a problem, but Sirius was hated among our family. Especially by my father. Wait! Was...was my dad_ jealous _of Sirius? Is that why he hated him so much? I mean, of course our family also hated him because he was a _blood_ _traitor_, but did it add a little extra hatred on my dad's part?

I sighed. This was complicated. Just then Harry walked by, almost missing me while I was sitting on the ground.

"Um, Atarah? Why exactly are you sitting on the ground. Something wrong?" He sat down next to me and took my hands in his. I sighed.

"Oh, nothing much. I just found out that Sirius has a crush on my mother and she likes him back even though she's married and is in Slytherin. Also, just adding to that, they're coming to visit which _isn't_ good, let me tell you that. They're probably planning some horrible death for you and then they're going to force me to leave school and become a Death Eater just like my bloody father. Also, I'm finding myself falling for you when you're Harry bloody Potter, and Weasel and Granger are starting to grow on me, which means it's the end of the world. And I haven't spoken to Draco in a long time because it turns out that he _like _likes me when I didn't even know he did, so I don't know what to do about _that_, and then I-" I was cut off when Harry put a finger to my lips.

"Breathe." Huh? Oh...I gulped in a breath of air, not realizing that it had been missing. I sighed, and Harry laughed softly.

"Now, _what_ were you saying? I only caught the bit about Sirius and your mum and you falling for me." He smirked. I groaned and smacked him slightly with my hand.

"Of _course_ that's the only part you would pick up."

"So, what's going on?" Resting my head on his shoulder, I replied.

"It's complicated..."

**A/N: Sorry for such a long wait, I've been kinda busy lately. Soo, how did you like it? Leave a review telling me! There's a new poll for this story, so check that out please. And if you haven't seen it yet, there's a banner for this story on my profile; it's awesome. Anything else to talk about, oh yes! So in this chapter you learn that Sirius was in love with Rayanne once, and she was in love with him as well. This definitely leads to some serious complications among the family. That's really the only major thing that happens in this chap. So, I would like to hear some predictions on what's going to happen next. With the Sirius situation, with Harry/Atarah, with Rose, even with Draco. I'd like to get into the minds of my faithful reviewers. Bwahahaha! Okay, I'll just leave you alone to review now...**


	15. No Good Deed

**A/N: OOOOMMMMMMMGGGGG! I am sooooo sorry for the huge long wait for this chapter! Let's just say there was a lot of personal things going on, and then I had a writer's block. This chapter is short, but at least it's something. Review and forgive me!**

When dawn arrived, the Order had decided that it was finally safe to visit Mr. Weasley without giving away the reason we knew so fast, and we set off for the hospital. We floo-ed there, and I couldn't help but grimace at all of the white. Did they think that white was soothing? That it made people feel safe ? All it did was remind families of why they're here; it was an obvious failure. Harry raised his eyebrows at my pained expression, and I shot him a glare.

When everyone arrived at Mr. Weasley's door, they all rushed in-everyone except me. Harry held back and tilted his head slightly to the left.

"Why aren't you coming in?" He asked gently, as if it wasn't the most obvious thing in the world. I sighed and shook my head at him.

"Well, all the time's I've spoken with him I've _insulted_ him. I can't barge in and pretend like nothing happened!" I raised my voice at him, and winced when I realized it came out as a shout. Harry narrowed his emerald eyes at me.

"You don't HAVE to pretend! You're not _supposed_ to pretend! Is that what you've been doing, just _pretending_?" Harry yelled back in a hushed whisper, as to not alert everyone else of our little...argument. I glared at him.

"What the hell? I haven't been pretending!" I stepped closer to him. "But I could pretend right now, pretend that I'm happy and not standing next to a complete ARSE" I took it too far, and he looked like he was about to hit something, hopefully not me. I backed away, and he sent one last glare towards me before stepping into the room and slapping on a fake smile.

"Agh!" I slammed my fist onto the white wall beside me. This was all my fault. I was still upset about my parents visiting, and my mum and Sirius being in love with each other. I snapped at Harry and I regretted it, horribly. I was about go in to apologize, but I was interrupted by Mrs. Weasley poking her head out and calling for me.

"Oh, Atarah dear, he wants to see you," She ushered me into the room, where Harry was looking pointedly away from me. I sighed and walked over to Mr. Weasley's side, making sure that I was looking at my feet the entire way there.

"Can you give us a moment?" Mr. Weasley's kind voice urged his family to leave. They just stared. He cleared his throat, and they quickly filed out of the small white room. When we were alone, I still had my head down, afraid of what he must think of me.

"Atarah, look at me," I slowly raised my head to meet his gaze. "I know that our past has been...unkind, but I would like to start over," His eyes sparkled as he spoke to me. "I know that you're capable of goodness, I've seen it myself. My only question is why now?"

His question struck me. Why did I decide to become all lovey dovey right NOW of all times. Why now? And I knew.

"A few weeks ago I got into a huge fight with Harry." I smiled at the distant memory. "Afterwards, I let everything that I had been holding in...out. On Harry, unfortunately for him, but at least I got it out. And with my heart empty of all my hatred, I let him in. He changed me, Mr. Weasley. For the better." My eyes glistened with my tears, and I didn't bother in wiping them away.

"Well then," He smiled at me, and his battered face was kind. "I'm sure glad he did." I smiled at him, and got up.

"Thank you Mr. Weasley. For everything." I turned, and walked out the white door.

~#%^&*()

A few hours later, we left for Sirius's house. I was tired, and I couldn't function properly. It was like, something was...PULLING me to sleep, and pretty soon I was in a dark place. The wind was rushing through my long blonde hair, and I couldn't see anything. It went on that way for a few minutes until a light appeared.

Rose. The light in my darkness.

"Atarah!" She looked panicked, as if something extremely bad was going to happen.

"Atarah!" She ran to me and hugged me, only coming up to my chest.

"I, I have to tell you something before I go," She had to go, WHY?

"Why?" My voice cracked and my eyes were wide with shock. Rose just shook her head.

"There are RULES, Atarah! You're not supposed to visit people after yo-you DIE, and I've broken that rule too many times!" She was yelling now, trying to be heard over the wind.

"One last thing before I go!" She looked up at me with sad eyes.

"I've always been different from everyone else in the family, haven't I?" And she was. She was brave and courageous, while everyone else was cruel and thoughtful.

"Well, there's a reason!" She held on tighter to me. "I'm your half-sister!" WHAT? She couldn't be, I SAW my mother pregnant with her! But, but, maybe, my father...

"Sirius is my father!" And with that, I almost fainted. She couldn't be, HE couldn't be! But even as I tried to toss away the ides, I knew it was true. I looked into her grey eyes and I could see Sirius's daughter staring back. It-it almost made me feel like an outcast. The one person I loved, wasn't really mine...

"I love you." And she started to fade out. Her skin appeared to be translucent, and her grip loosened. She screamed out to me, but I could barely hear it.

"ROSE!" I tried to grab her arm, but I just went through her.

"DON'T LEAVE ME!" I PLEASE! ROSE! NO!" And then I woke up. Someone was standing over me, but I couldn't see because of the tears blocking my vision.

"Rose..." I sobbed.

"Oh, Atarah..." I could hear Hermione whisper. I could feel gentle arms holding me, and I threw myself into them. I needed this, a hug, even if was from Granger. No, I was GLAD it was her. I tightened my arms around her, and I sobbed into her soft shirt.

"What's going o-" Whoever was speaking stopped when he saw us, and became quiet.

"What happened?" The voice was urgent, and I knew it belonged to Harry, but I wasn't quite sure if it was a good thing. Thinking that we needed time alone, Hermione gently peeled me off of her chest, leaving me huddled in a ball on the floor. Harry sat down beside me.

"Are you okay?" His question was hesitant, as if he didn't know if it was the right thing to say or not. He was probably cautious since our last "talk". I wiped my tears away and nodded.

"I had a dream." And so I told him everything. About how Rose had visited me the night after she had died, and almost every night since. And how she left me. But the one thing I left out who her real father was.

And then I was mad. Why didn't they TELL me? Why? I stood and tugged on my hair. Where was he? I ran to the kitchen, but he wasn't there, only Fred and George. I suddenly got an idea and ran to the room with the family tree on the wall.

"Atarah!" Harry ran after me, but I ignored him.

"_Reducto_!" I blasted the door to pieces to reveal a shocked Sirius.

"Why didn't you TELL me? How could you look me in the eyes and not TELL me?" I walked closer to him and held my thin wand to his throat.

"Tell you what?" He started to get angry, just like I knew he would.

"Rose..." I whispered, and his eyes widened in his shock. He raised his hands.

"How did you know? Did your mother tell you?" I laughed sarcastically and shook my head. Harry looked back and forth between us, obviously confused.

"That woman hasn't told me anything since she told me she loved you." She didn't actually tell me that she loved him, but she dropped a big enough hint.

"Ray? She still loves me?" His face brightened up, and I couldn't help but drop my wand at that familiar face. It was Rose's. I shook my hand and used wand less magic to call my wand back to me. I was so close to cursing him, but the spell on my lips shocked me.

_Sectumsempra_.

The spell used by Snape, the one that could KILL someone...

I ran out of the house as fast as I could, throwing my wand down as I did so. I just needed...OUT. After around ten minutes of running and making sure no one was following me, I found my way to a small park that was empty, and I sat on one of the swings.

I was a monster. I was about to KILL someone! How could I even THINK of doing something like that? I groaned and ripped out some my hair in frustration. I was like my parents;

And that's what hurt the most.

I sat there for an hour more, thinking of what a complete MONSTER I was. And finally, I knew what I had to do. Walking home, I thought over what I would say and what I would do. I sighed, and continued walking in silence.

When I stepped into the living room, he was waiting for me; Harry. I looked down and sat down in one of the comfortable chairs.

"We need to talk." He seemed concerned at the tone of my voice and he pulled out a chair in from of me.

"Wit-with what happened today,"

I gulped. "I almost did something that I would have regretted, horribly." I looked into his beautiful green eyes and hoped he could see what was about to happen in them. "The spell I was about to cast wasn't just a harmless jinx, and the whole thing made me think, what am I doing? I'm trying to do good, but all I'm able to do is bad. For me, there IS no good deed." Harry was about to object, but I stopped him.

"So what am I doing here? I can't be around a bunch of good people when I KNOW I'm bad! I-I, can't be around...YOU." I whispered, wishing I didn't have to do this. Harry shook his head in disbelief and he held my hands in his own. I quickly pulled them away.

"Are you...breaking up with me?"

I nodded, and got up, not wanting him to see the tears in my eyes

**A/N: I just thought that things were going too well for Atarah and Harry, so I put in a little break up scene, hope you're not angry! There'll be more Atarah/Draco soon, just to let you know! I was also thinking of doing a companion story, one about Rayanne, Atarah's mom, just to give you some more background. Let me know, my little reviewers :)**


	16. Choices and a Ball

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the wait! Lots of things have been going on lately, so I apologize for the inconvenience. It's a big sob story, so I won't say anything other than it included a hospital visit, along with a family death. That's why last month I was so late in delivering the last chapter. Sorry again, and here's the next one! And I found the perfect quote for this chapter-"You can close your eyes to things you do not want to see, but you cannot close your heart to things you do not want to feel." Perfect, isn't it?**

I knew that I had made my choice. It was the second time, and hopefully the _final_ time. I was worn-out of making choices and not being able to stick to them, and besides, I needed a way out. My feelings for Harry were too genuine, and that could be dangerous for everyone around me. So I was leaving. I was in the room given to me by Mrs. Weasley, and I was packing up my bag when there was a quiet knock at the door. I sighed.

"Come on in," I shouted. The door opened and I was surprised to see Hermione walk in. She sat down beside me on the bed. And for a few minutes there was silence, and nobody really wanted to break it. Finally, she spoke.

"I heard about what happened. And I have only one thing to say to you," She turned her head, looking me straight in my eyes.

"You _are_ good, Atarah. Five months ago I would have said you were an evil bloody git, but now I know. You _are_ good, Atarah, I've seen it." Her words were like fire and they burned my heart, turning it into ash. I could feel tears coming on, so I stood up and grabbed my black bag.

"Hermione, you don't _know_ me. That's the problem! You've _never_ known me," I faced toward the door, away from her, not wanting her to see the tears in my green eyes.

"I'm leaving, Hermione. And if my word is any good, I won't be back." I walked out of the door, and into a hopefully new life.

When I was out on the streets, I called the Knight Bus, and it was only seconds before the purple triple-decker bus made it's way over to me, screeching to a stop just before it passed. I grimaced, and hopped into it, choosing a seat at the very back. And for thirty minutes I was tossed about, flying out of the chair more than once, especially when the bus came to a complete stop in front of my house. I picked myself up, grabbed my bag, and got off of the cruel bus.

Here I was. After months and months of being away, I was finally home. I walked slowly to the massive front door, it was taller than two Hagrids put together! I gulped, and knocked with the serpent knocker that we had. It took only ten seconds before the door opened, and I was face to face with my mother.

"Atarah?" She asked in absolute disbelief. She opened her arms, and for a minute, I actually thought she was going to hug me! But then she just grimaced and patted my shoulder awkwardly. So much for the hug. I sighed and walked into our greeting room. This was where we'd take a visitors coat and ask them how their day was. A whole room for it.

I quickly ran up to my room, not wanting to run into my father. When I got to the family green room, I instantly felt better. This was the place that was my home, not the house itself, but my room. I smiled and laid down on my green bed. Yes, everything in my room was green. Go team! Right? I sighed and groaned. Life was confusing.

I was just about to send a letter to Draco when the door opened and my mother walked in, carrying something in a large bag. She it down beside me, and smiled proudly.

"Open it." I smiled cautiously at her, not sure of what she was up to, but I followed her instructions and unzipped the huge package. And gasped.

It was the most beautiful dress I had ever seen. A light blue color, it had no straps and had not very noticeable ruffles towards the bottom, it was puffy like a ball gown from the muggle stories. I looked up at my mother, confused.

"It's for the ball tomorrow night," The ball? Then I remembered. Every year at Christmas, we held our own Yule Ball for practically everyone. Everyone except muggleborns, that is. The Minster of Magic would be there, everyone from the Ministry, and almost all purebloods. Draco and I have been going together ever since we were kids. Now I wished I could go with someone else...but enough of that.

"Mum, it's...it's..."

"It was mine when I was your age, and I know I want _you_ to have it." I looked up at her, and for the first time, I realized that I had thought of her as _Mum_ and not _mother_...for the first time I had actually felt like she _loved_ me. Before I could stop myself, I jumped up and embraced my mum in a back-breaking hug...that she _returned_. I laughed. _This_ was home.

I pulled away from her and looked back to the dress, it was definitely the most _beautiful_ dress I had ever had at one of these balls.

"Thanks," I coughed nervously, waiting for the scolding for my "reckless" emotions. But it didn't come, as she just smiled, then left.

I got up and started to write a letter to Draco.

_Dear Draco,_

_I have the BEST dress ever for the ball tomorrow! I can't believe my mum would actually give something like_ _that__ to me! I'm so excited! Respond soon, I need __someone__ to talk to!_

_Love,_

_'Tara_

Once I got Zoosh to come over to me, I sent the letter off. It took only a few minutes before the owl flew back in with a response.

_Dear 'Tara,_

_Wow. Must be some dress, cause you've never been this girly before. Ha-ha, I'm sure you'll look beautiful, like always. And your __mum__ gave it to you? Was she drunk? Was she under a spell? That's crazy! But great! Can't wait for the ball tomorrow as well, can't wait for you to step on my toes as we dance...Just joking._

_With All My Love,_

_Draco_

I laughed. Draco would be Draco. And I was a _good_ dancer, despite what he says. I smirked and thought of the times he's stepped on _my_ toes, and laughed again. A few minutes later an owl flew in.

_Forget the Dears,_

_Wait a second! Aren't you supposed to be with the blood-traitors for Christmas? Why did the plans change?_

_Blah Blah Blah Just __Respond__, _

_Draco_

Ah, he was smart. I sighed and got out my pen and paper again.

_Draco,_

_I kind of, well, __left__. Let's just say that I couldn't handle another day there, so I packed up and left. I told Potter that I was no good, and that I couldn't do this to his friends and family. That's all there is to it._

_Love,_

_'Tara_

He sent a response back in record time.

_WHAT? What about...Voldemort? You have a __mission__, Atarah!_

I froze. He was right. What was I going to _do_? Well, like Rose had said before, I could feed him false information. But I was on his side! Wasn't I? I groaned; this was too difficult! I decided that I would think about this later, so I sent a letter telling Draco that, and it ended our conversation. I fell asleep within minutes, dreaming about the ball tomorrow night.

The next day I woke up with a smile. This would be a good day, for I would _make_ it a good day! I got up and threw on clothes, rushing out of my room and down the three flights of stairs. I _hated_ stairs...

When I got downstairs, I saw that my mother already had Abra (Our house elf) working on the decorations. It looked like the theme was snow and ice, so everything was blue, and there were snowflakes falling from the impossibly tall ceiling. I laughed and twirled around. Abra squealed and bowed to the floor.

"Does mistress like the decorations?" She asked in her tiny voice. I smiled sadly, she was a very young house elf, and here we were, making her work like this!

"Yes, Abra. It's _beautiful_." She hopped up and smiled widely, exposing all of her small teeth. She bowed once more, then ran off to do more work. I twirled once more, then ran to the kitchen, where Velda (our other house elf) was preparing food for the ball. I sat down at a smaller table and called her over.

"Can I get something to eat, Velda?" She nodded, her ears flopping as she did so.

"Of course, mistress." She hobbled off, and came back only a minute later with a pile of fresh fruit. I practically shoved all of it into my mouth at once, it was _so_ good. After I was done, I ran back up to my room to hang out. I was about to sit down on my bed when I noticed that there was a letter waiting for me. I picked it up and tore it open gently.

_Dear Atarah,_

_I know that our last talk didn't go over well, but I want you to know that I'm here for you, no matter what. You may say you're bad, but you're not, and you __know__ it. You actually chose __us__ over You-Know-Who, and even if you say you "went back", you can't be that bad. I just wanted you to know that. Harry misses you, you know. You're very special to him, and you broke his heart when you left. There's still time, you can still come back! Please come back, is what I guess I'm asking. You've become a great friend, and it's just not the same without you._

_With Hope and Love,_

_Hermione Granger_

I _can't_ come back. No matter how much they plead. I sighed, and ripped the letter in shreds, but not before I read it again and again. Harry misses me...I shook my head, riding myself of such things. It was only ten in the morning, so I decided to take a nap in the time I had left.

When I woke up it was six o'clock and time to get ready. I carefully put on my new dress and threw on some matching makeup. Looking in the mirror, I gasped. I was beautiful. And I wasn't being modest at all_, _I looked _beautiful!_ I silently thanked my mother and sat down on my bed, waiting. Yesterday Draco said he would meet me in my room, so I simply waited, kicking my feet every now and then.

There was a knock at the door, and I opened it to see Draco standing there. When he saw me, he froze and simply stared.

"Wow..." I laughed.

"That's what _I_ said," I smirked at his expression, and held out an elbow to him, which he took.

"Let's do this."

**A/N: Let me know what you think. I edited it a lot from it's original chapter, and I like it better this way. R&R please!**


	17. An Unexpected Guest

**A/N: Here's another chapter, sorry it's short, had to leave.**

Holding onto Draco for dear life, we slowly descended the stair to our deaths. Or to dancing. Whatever you call it. All eyes were on us, and I'll admit; I'm _vain_. I enjoyed every minute of it, grinning proudly to the hundreds of people who were already downstairs, enjoying the ball. Even Lucious and Narcissa came, while they usually skip things like this. When we reached the bottom, Draco let go of my arm, and bowed slightly.

"May a have this dance?" He smiled; we did this every time. I rolled my eyes, but nodded.

"Of course, you goofball..." I muttered under my breath. He took my hand, and lead me to the center of the dance floor that Abra had set up. With a deep breath, we began. It was probably the most fun I'd had in ages! We were twirling, twisting, and just _dancing_ to the beat of the music coming from the live band to our left. I laughed as he dipped me low, almost to the floor, then whisked me up easily. Okay, _fine_. He was a great dancer, despite what I've said. I quickly shook out the white snowflakes from my hair.

When the song was over, we smiled at each other, then did what we did every single time. Talk to people, because after the dance it seemed everyone wanted to say _something_. After thirty minutes of meandering through the crowd, I stopped to talk to one more woman.

"Hello ma'am, are you enjoying the ball?" I asked politely, smiling widely. She was a brunette, and looked to be about forty years old. She had a kind smile, an unusual trait in purebloods.

"Yes, dear, I am. It's just lovely!" I nodded, and was about to move on when she called me back.

"I hope you don't me asking, but how long have you two been together?" Who was she talking about?

"I don't understand, miss..." I shook my head. She pointed over to Draco.

"That young man over there, how long have you two been together?" I widened my eyes in surprise.

"Draco?" I asked incredulously. "Oh, no! We aren't together. We're _just_ friends!" I smiled, wondering if we really looked that way. It didn't seem like it while we were dancing, but I suppose others could take it the wrong way.

"Oh, dear, I apologize. It just seemed that way," She bowed her head slightly, and I nodded back before running over to my mother.

"Is everything going smoothly, mother?" I asked. She nodded.

"That dance you had with Draco was just _perfect_. Now everyone will think you two are the perfect couple!" She clapped her hands, but I just stood there with my mouth ajar.

"Why do we want people to think that?" She frowned and turned to me, then shot me a pointed look.

"You and Draco _are_ a perfect match, so it's only right that you two be together." I shook my head.

"Draco is my _best_ friend, but I don't like him in _that_ way. I'm not going to be "with him", like you say I will!" I whispered loudly, not wanting anyone else to her. I could barely say the word, together, before her hand came flying at me, slapping me right in the cheek. Her eyes were fuming.

"You will do as I say, Atarah. Now go out, and slow dance with Draco. Go!" I held my cheek in my hand, trying to stop the stinging. I grabbed Draco's arm from where he was talking to someone, and dragged him out onto the floor, where a slow song was playing. He was confused, but went along with it.

I made sure to danced close to him, putting my arms around his shoulders, making sure to put on a good show for my mother.

"What's wrong?" Draco asked gently. I sighed, and rested my head on his shoulder.

"My mother is hell bent on having us be together." I whispered.

"Well, with such a good looking guy, would that be so bad?" He joked, and I smiled slightly. Draco could always cheer me in when I was in moods like this.

"I love you Draco, I just...don't..._love_ you." I lifted my head to search his face. He seemed a little sad, so I kissed him on the cheek.

"I know..." He whispered in a voice so soft I could barely hear it. We danced for a while longer, until Draco stiffened, his eyes frozen on something behind him. I let go and turned around to see someone standing a hundred feet away from us.

Harry.

What the freaking hell? I let go of Draco and walked as fast as I could in these heels, trying to reach him before anyone else.

"_Harry_ freaking _James_ freaking _Potter_! What are you doing here? Do you know how many," I lowered my voice, "Death Eaters there are here, Harry?" I looked over my shoulder, to see my mother and father rushing over to where we stood. _Oh Merlin help us!_ My father strode right over and was about to grab Harry by the collar when I stepped in the way.

"No, Dad. Anyone can come, remember?" I tried to hint that by doing anything to Harry, he would reveal to everyone at the ball, including the minister of magic, that he was a Death Eater. I leaned forward and whispered in his ear.

"I invited him, father. Because of the mission," It was a total lie, but it worked. He backed off, but his eyes were still fuming. Only my mother remained, and I whispered something in her ear as well.

"See? I can't be with Draco, I have to seduce Harry, remember?" She nodded curtly at me, then turned her attention to Harry, who was still standing there with his mouth open.

"Welcome dear, and enjoy the party! Is there anything I can get for you?" She sounded totally convincing, but to me she just sounded _fake_. Harry shook his head and smiled politely. My mother turned around and walked away. Only I saw the furious expression she had as she was leaving. I turned to Harry and grabbed his shoulders.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I exclaimed with horror. But he just smiled.

"I'm not leaving our conversation the way it ended. I'm not letting you go." I shushed him, and grabbed him hand, leading him to the dance floor. I couldn't help but smile when he put his hand on my waist; it sent a spark through my body that made me shiver. I put my hand on his shoulder, then my other in his own hand. When the music began, we were off. Harry wasn't nearly as good as a dancer as Draco was, but I enjoyed dancing with him even more.

"What do you mean, you won't let me go?" I asked, curious. He sighed and smiled slightly, making my heart flip in the process.

"Atarah, I have never felt this way about another girl before, and I'm not about to lose that." He smiled again. His words made me feel so good inside, yet at the same time they stung.

"Bu-" He cut me off.

"And I'm definitely not losing you over something as _silly_ as "you not being good", because that's completely untrue, and you know it!" I lowered my head.

"Harry, I can't do this to you. My parents want nothing more than to kill you!" And kill me too if they knew my feelings for Harry were real.

"So do a _whole_ bunch of other people," He pointed out. That was true. But I needed to scare him off somehow.

"If I matter so much to you, then how to you feel about me being the god-daughter of Voldemort himself." He stiffened slightly at the news, but then relaxed.

"Surprisingly, it doesn't bother me. It's not what you are, it's who you are, right?" I couldn't believe it. Even something as big as _that_ didn't faze him. I tried again.

"Snape is like a father to me."

"Gross, but fine."

"Draco Malfoy is my best friend."

"Don't know what you see in him, but okay."

"My last name is Manston."

"Very scary."

"I give up!" I moaned, knowing I would never get anywhere. I smiled at his stubbornness.

"But I don't agree to anything. Harry, you mean a lot to me, more than anyone else has, and _I_ don't want to lose that as well. That's why I can't _be_ with you anymore!" I whispered; I wasn't giving up this fight. I wouldn't. _Couldn't_. He sighed.

"At least stay with us. Hermione and Ron need you, the _D.A. _needs you! Please, at least stay and help with Dumbledore's Army. It's harmless." He proved a point. I still needed to feed Voldemort information, and here was my opportunity. And the thought of leaving the D.A. made me feel horrible, so I nodded.

"Fine," He smiled.

"But nothing changes between us!" I made sure he understood, and he nodded.

"Friends?" He asked, not sure of himself.

"Friends." I confirmed.

**A/N: R&R!**


	18. At War With Love

**A/N: This chapter is rated T+ for two naughty curse words that I haven't used before :) Lol, it's not that bad... There's a Draco/Harry fight in here, so be prepared for male macho-ness! And Rayanne showing some humanity. Fun! Let me know what you think. Oh, and I need you to comment on whether I should let Sirius to live or not. I have to versions planned out, so I could go either way, but I wanted your opinion! Let me know :)**

We continued dancing in silence after that. I think we were both afraid of letting each other go, so I made sure to grip his hand extra tight. Even with our _strictly _friends relationship, we enjoyed the dancing and the twirling, and we didn't even notice that we were the only ones on the dance floor, being stared at by every single one of the guests. The only thing that got us to snap out of it was a bright camera flash.

We both stopped for a moment and turned to the source of the noise, where a person from the Daily Prophet stood beaming, exposing his white teeth.

"This'll make front page, it will!" I glanced over to Harry, but he just shrugged. He didn't seem to care. I rolled my eyes.

"You know what they're going to say about us, right?" He just shrugged again and smiled.

"I don't care." I laughed at this stubborn thing he had going on right now. He smiled at the sound of my laughter and in turn it made _me_ smile. I rolled my eyes.

"Sure you don't, Potter." And with that we danced again. And again. And pretty soon half of the ball was over.

"Let's take a break, I don't think this much dancing is good for you..." I panted. We both smiled, and parted ways, but not before he said one more thing.

"Atarah, you look _beautiful_, by the way." I sat down and smiled; this night was even better than I dreamt.

**!#$%^**

**Rayanne Manston's POV**

**!#$%^**

Rayanne Manston sat on a chair, watching her daughter dance with Harry Potter. She was looking at the way they were smiling, and laughing, and talking, even. She saw the way the Potter boy sneaked looks at her daughter when he thought she wasn't looking. The way they just communicated everything through a look, Rayanne _knew_. She _knew_ what that feeling was, for she had felt it once before. Once, long ago...

_Sirius. _She thought painfully. Once upon a time she fell in love with the wrong boy. She was supposed to meet a nice and wealthy Slytherin, who would be able to support a family, but she just _had_ to go and fall in love with a stubborn Gryffindor. Rayanne sighed and put her head in her small, pale hands.

Her daughter was in love. Whether she realized it or not was a different story. Rayanne wanted to talk to her daughter about it, but how would she bring up the subject? I know that you're in love with Harry Potter, and you don't even know it yet? She sighed again. She couldn't even be truly mad that it was Harry Potter, since she fell in love with a Gryffindor as well.

She could only hope that this would end well, but knew it was impossible.

**!#$%^**

**Atarah Manston's POV**

**!#$%^**

I was humming along to the music when something suddenly hit me; I hadn't seen Draco since Harry had gotten here. I shot out of my seat, knowing exactly where he was. Running down the hallways of my house as fast as I could in my heels and dress, I made my way to the gardens where we used to sit and talk about things. Sighing, I pushed open the door to the gardens, walking slowly towards Draco's still figure. I sat down beside him gently, not saying anything.

And for several minutes we stayed that way, not talking, just _sitting_, staring at the full moon in silence. Then he spoke.

"Do you know how _maddening_ it is?" He turned to me with sad eyes. His expression was so pained, my heart clenched and broke into a million pieces in that instant.

"To know that _he_ can hold you, and _I_ can't?" His voice cracked, and I frowned. I was about to say something, when he put a finger on my lips. He laughed humorlessly.

"I _love_ you, Atarah, and I have since the moment I laid eyes on you. Your laugh, your smile, the way you can be so _stubborn_, I love it all. You make my world spin, and without you I feel _empty,_ inside." He lowered his finger.

"And to know that I can't be with you hurts. It hurts more than anything else in this world. And what's worse is seeing you with _him_. It _hurts_; knowing that I'll never be that to you. I never knew that it would be this hard to lose someone I never truly had." He smiled softly, and I just sat there with my mouth open.

I was shocked by what his words. Did I really matter _that_ much to him? I loved him, I loved him _so_ much, but I could never love him in that way. But why not? Why couldn't I just make everything better and just love him back? I lowered my head. What was I supposed to say? So I just leaned my head against his shoulder, hoping it communicated my feelings. And that was it. We spoke no more, sitting peacefully side by side in the moonlight. I sighed, this moment was both perfect and sad. Until a throat clearing made us turn around. It was Harry.

Draco stiffened, but I put a hand on his leg, calming him. He stood up and brushed past Harry, running into him with a force that almost knocked Harry off of his feet.

"Potter," He spat. Harry straightened up and moved even closer to Draco, leaving only a foot in between them.

"What's your _bloody_ problem, Malfoy?" He spat right back. I stood up, knowing this wouldn't end well at all.

"My, "_problem"_, Potter, is _you_," Malfoy yelled harshly.

"Why don't you get your head out of your _arse_, Malfoy, and be a bloody grown up for once?" Draco turned red as he took in what was being said. I rushed forward, but stopped quickly, not wanting to get in between them.

"Guys-." They started yelling again.

"At least I-!"

"You're a-!" I couldn't stand it anymore.

"_Stop it!_" I screeched on the top of my lungs, rushing forward and putting my hand on Draco's arm. He shook me off, and pushed me roughly to the ground. I winced at the pain, and looked up to see Harry punch Draco with a force that actually knocked him to the floor. Harry ran to my side.

"Are you okay?" I nodded, but stood quickly as Draco made his way back over to us. I screeched again, with unintelligible words. Then I slapped him as hard as my body would allow.

"_Draco_! Why the _fucking _hell are you doing this? You should listen to Harry and learn to _fucking _grow up!" I slapped him again, then rushed past him, tears in my eyes. How could he do this to me? He was being a freaking arse-hole! I ran, not to any place in particular, just running from _everything_. Why did this have to happen to me? How could he be so...so..._mean_ and not care about anything? Why couldn't he just be less like his father and more human?

Pretty soon I was sitting on one of our multiple staircases, crying my eyes out, when I felt an arm on my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around the person, knowing that it was Harry. I needed some comfort, and right now he was the only one who could give that to me.

I held onto him for dear life, not wanting to ever let him go. Why did my life have to be so complicated? Why couldn't it just be _simple_? I hiccupped slightly, and let go of arHarryHHHH

Harry.

"Thank you," I whispered, meaning thank you for so many things. For coming to the ball, for convincing me to go to the D.A., for defending me when Draco hurt me, for being here next to me. He smiled softly.

"Anytime," I stood up and took his arm.

"We should probably go back to the ball." I started to lead him away, but he stopped me.

"Like that?" He pointed to my back and arm, which were covered in scrapes from when I was pushed. I shook my head and pulled out my thin wand. I muttered a spell, and the scrapes quickly healed and faded. I smiled brightly at Harry, then started forward again. We walked quietly to the dance floor, where we continues to dance like nothing was wrong, trying to forget what happened.

I sighed, and rested my head on Harry's shoulder. This was too much.

**A/N: R&R, and tell me whether Sirius should die or not. I love Sirius and **_**want**_** him to live, but at the same time I want to stay true to the books. Let me know what you think!**


	19. Home Again

**A/N: Sorry for not updating in a loooonngggg time! I had a major writer's block for this story and I'm having a really hard time trying to choose where to go with this, but I promise that I'll try to finish it. It's almost done, so I'll try to pull through for you guys. If you have any questions, suggestions, or just plan random comments, let me know in a review :)**

The rest of the winter ball flew by, and pretty soon, I was saying my goodbyes to Harry and the rest of our rich guests. I didn't know where Draco ran off to, but if he had a soul, he would have already left. He did that sometimes, his anger just fully _consumes_ him, and soon enough he's hurting someone that he really loves. I think that it's because of his father, who is evil and cruel and deceptive. I knew that Draco's heart was good, but part of it was infected by his father's blood. Even if I knew it wasn't his fault, I was slow to forgive him. He really hurt me this time, and I didn't want things to get out of hand the next time. If there _was_ a next time.

I shook my head, trying to rid myself of thoughts like that. Eventually things would get better; they _had_ to, and they always did. I sighed, and slowly walked up the three flights of stairs to my room, thinking of how good of a time I had, even with the whole Draco situation. I smiled, thinking of all the dancing and twirling and dipping. It was just like a muggle fairytale, one of the ones I would read to Rose. But in all of the stories there was a happily ever after, and I could only hope my tale turned out the same way.

**!#$%^**

The next few days passed fairly quickly, the time filled with reading books and practicing different spells for the D.A. I could _almost_ cast a patronus, and I was eager to see what form the it would take. They said that the patronus is an incarnation of the caster's spirit, so I wanted to see what I was like on the inside. Probably a snake or something else slimy like it.

School started back up tomorrow and I couldn't wait. Hogwarts was my home. My want to go home was _so_ great, I found myself sitting on my bed, stuff packed, waiting in anticipation. Pretty soon, it was September 1st, and my mother was dropping me off at the King's Cross station. She pushed me forward slightly once we got there, and smiled hesitantly at me.

"Be good, Atarah, and _please_ be safe." My mother's last words echoed in my ears for a long while after she said them. I smiled back at her small form, then ran off with my full cart. I winced like always when I ran through the brick barrier, but laughed when I made it through to the other side. I quickly boarded the train, and searched for a particular compartment. After a few minutes of searching, I finally found the one person I was looking for.

"Hey Hermione," I slid the compartment door shut behind me, and sat down in the seat opposite her. She looked up, surprised at my sudden entry.

"Atarah? What happened to make you change your mind?" She asked incredulously. And so I told her. I told her everything that happened at the ball, skipping only the part about Draco. She smiled dreamily afterwards and looked out the half opened window.

"I wish a guy would do that for me..." She patted my leg gently, showing that she was happy for me. I laughed and sighed, leaning my head back against the seat.

"We're _just_ friends, Hermione," She rolled her eyes and looked at me like I had completely lost it.

"Sure," She was going to say more than that, but was cut off by Ron and Harry entering the compartment. Ron narrowed his vivid blue eyes when he saw me, but said nothing as he sat down beside Hermione. Harry grinned brightly when he saw me, and quickly sat down by my side.

"Hey, Atarah."

"Hey, Harry." We spoke at the same time, then chuckled slightly afterwards. I could see Ron roll his eyes, but I ignored him.

"So," I tried to start a conversation to fill the now awkward silence.

"How was everyone's Christmas?"

The rest of the train ride passed that way, filled with small talk and lopsided smiles. It was fun, and I caught Harry staring at me several times, making me blush. When we arrived at the looming castle of Hogwarts, I was actually tempted to sit with the Gryffindors. Which was _not_ good. So I just sighed and trudged over to the Slytherin table, taking a seat at the very end, all by myself. When it came time for Dumbledore's speech, I zoned out completely, just like every other person here.

He dismissed us soon after that, but not before he caught my eyes as I was leaving the Great Hall. How is it _possible_ that his eyes actually _twinkle_ like that? Was anyone else concerned by this? It was _beyond_ strange! I rushed to the Slytherin common rooms, not wanting to run into Draco, or anybody else for that matter. I ran up the long staircase to my room, and changed into my dark green pajamas. I wanted nothing more than for the day to end, so I jumped into my four poster bed, closing my light green eyes.

That night passed by swiftly and without any nightmares, and for _that_ I was grateful. But also no dream of Rose. _Rose_...my heart clenched tightly, and I froze. I hadn't noticed how much I had missed her nightly visits until this very moment. I sighed, and threw off my thick covers. I dressed in my usual black robes and headed down to breakfast, walking into the Great Hall with a brilliant smile. I started walking over to the Slytherin table, but then stopped abruptly when I saw Harry.

He was sitting alone at the Gryffindor table, eating his breakfast slowly and quietly. I smirked, and pulled my hair into a high ponytail. I padded over to him, and plopped myself down beside him.

"Hey Harry." He dropped his piece of toast onto his plate when he saw me, and stared with wide eyes. He shook his head slightly.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, completely surprised by my actions. I just shrugged as if it was nothing, when in truth, it was _everything_. People would gossip after this, but I didn't particularly care about that.

"Sitting down. Thought it was obvious." I smirked, and Harry's worried frown turned into a content grin.

"Okay," He accepted it as if it was nothing, so I laughed. He could be so oblivious sometimes. I was about to say something else sarcastic when I heard the owls flying above me. I looked up to see the daily mail dropped in front of me. There was nothing really interesting beside the usual Daily Prophet. But what caught my eye was the bold headline printed on the front page.

_**Mass Breakout From Azkaban**_

My heart just about stopped beating. I froze, but continued reading with frantic eyes. The Death Eaters were out of Azkaban. My pulse raced as I read the names to myself. Antonin Dolohov, Bellatrix Lestrange, Rabastan Lestrange, Rodolphus Lestrange, Augustus Rookwood, and five other names that I didn't recognize. I set down the paper with shaking hands and stared into space. What was I going to do? This _couldn't_ be true, Dolohov _couldn't_ be out! Anybody but him, oh Merlin please! Before I could stop myself, my mind flashed back to a moment in time that I would give anything to forget.

_I walked slowly down the long narrow hallway to my kitchen, hoping for a late night snack. I was so wrapped up in my self-centered thoughts, that I didn't notice the dark figure that was trailing quietly behind me. I turned a corner, and continued walking forward, but before I could get more than a foot further a hand reached out and pulled me back roughly. I tried to let out a shriek, but a gloved hand clasped over my mouth before I could make a sound._

_ I grunted and waved my arms about, trying to hit him in any way possible. My head turned slightly to the side, just enough to see my attacker's face. _Dolohov_. Antonin Dolohov. I should have known that the guy was a creep from the first time I laid my green eyes on him. Of course, I had already known that he was a stone cold murderer, I just never thought it would be _me_ he was attacking. How _dare_ he? In my own home!_

_ I threw my leg back, hitting him in the knee, and it caught him off guard. His grip lessened, and I was able to turn around. Unfortunately, he recovered and quickly grabbed my shoulders tightly, throwing me against the opposite wall with a force hard enough to knock all of the wind out of me. He grinned evilly and licked his pale lips with desire._

_ "Got a little fight in you," He drew closer to me, putting his mouth to my ear. "I find that simply..._delicious_." I gasped loudly, causing him to cackle with pleasure. His eyes lowered to my breasts, and I knew what was going to come next. He grabbed my nightshirt and ripped it off, causing my pink bra to be shown to him. I blushed immediately, trying to cover up what he had exposed, but he didn't let me. He let go for a mere second, and I used the newfound opportunity to my advantage._

_ With all of my might, I punched him right in the face. He grunted, and fell backwards onto the floor. I bolted for the other end of the hallway, but he grabbed onto my ankle, making me fall to the floor, hitting my head in the process. With me disoriented, he climbed on top of me and smiled that wicked grin of his, and crushed his lips into mine. I squirmed around, trying to hit him again, but it only resulted in him slapping me. I gasped as he frantically tried to unclasp my bra. But something stopped him. Something saved me._

_ "Antonin _fucking _Dolohov! Get the _fuck_ off of my daughter!" I looked up to see my mother marching toward us with a glare that could kill anyone if it wanted to. Dolohov simply grinned at her._

_ "No one said she was off limits..." My mother jinxed him, sending him flying off of me. I scrambled to get up, rushing to hide behind my mother, who shielded me._

_ "Well then. _I _do." She spat. Dolohov laughed and crossed his arms like a child._

_ "What are you going to do about it, eh?" He taunted her; but it was clearly a mistake. She stepped over to him, pulling him up by his hair._

_ "How about this?" She slapped him harshly. "If you ever so much as _look_ at my daughter again..." She narrowed her eyes, letting go of Dolohov._

_ "I will _fucking_ kill you." Her words made even me shake in pure terror. He tried to play cool, and simply nodded back at her. He brushed past her small form, and walked past me as well, but not before he did one more thing that chilled me to the very bone. He leant in and kissed me wetly on the cheek._

_ "We'll see each other again, _sweetheart_." He winked, then twisted back around and walked out of our sight._

The bruises lasted months. The physiological wounds took even longer to heal. Just the thought of his face made me cringe in fear. He had never tried anything again after that, but then again, we hadn't had any time alone, thank Merlin.

"Atarah? Hey, are you okay?" I looked to my left to see Harry staring at me with concern. I gulped and passed him the wrinkled paper. He looked over it, frowning intensely when he saw what it was about. I took several deep breaths, trying to calm myself down. Harry put a hand gently on my leg.

"Are you sure you're going to be okay?" He was so _concerned_, it made me smile slightly. I glanced downwards, not wanting to tell him my whole sob story.

"I just wasn't expecting it, that's all..." I sort of told the truth. I really hadn't expected it, but there was more to the story. Bellatrix was out, which also sent shivers down my spine. I remember the _training_ sessions that we had. She taught me Legilimency, but punished me severely when the spell was unsuccessful. As a result, I was quite good at it, but even better at Occlumency. Hiding thoughts from someone is actually pretty easy, or maybe that had been because of my training with Snape. He said that it was imperative that I learned how to cover my thoughts, hiding them from anyone who attempted to penetrate my mind.

Whatever the reason, I was thankful. But the Death Eaters were _still_ out, and I knew where they were going to go. It was obvious, actually. The headquarters had been my own home for quite a while, the members only moving elsewhere for events such as the winter ball.

"Is there still going to be a D.A. meeting today, Harry?" I tried to change the subject to something lighter. He nodded and turned back to his uneaten toast.

"I think we're going to work on patronuses this time," He spoke, then turned back to me with a grin. "You _have_ been practicing, right?" His green orbs pierced through me. I rolled my eyes.

"Yeah. Haven't been able to do it yet, though," I frowned and stuffed a piece of toast in my mouth, chewing ferociously. "But I've been getting better!" Harry laughed at me, and continued eating.

**A/N: I'm ending it there, because I really don't know what to write anymore. Any suggestions? He he..Well then. If you review it may make me want to write more, so PRETTY PLEASE review! 3**


	20. Note

**Hey guys. Sorry if you're disappointed that this isn't a real chapter, but I really needed to get your guy's opinion. I was thinking of abandoning this story, as no one seems to be reading it. I also don't have a lot of time for it, what with my depression and school and all the things that life throws at you unexpectedly. I don't particularly **_**want**_** to abandon this story, but I want your opinion. Should I continue this story? PM me, or leave it in a review.**

**-LittleRobinForever **

**(Sara)**


	21. Other Note

Author's Note:

Hey guys! So, thanks to reviewers saying that they'd be extremely upset if I didn't continue this story, I have finally decided to continue it! Yay! I hope! Anyways, I've been sitting at my computer for the last three hours trying to get something on paper, but nothing is coming to me. It may take a while, for I am having a severe case of writers block. If any of you have ANY suggestions at all, it would be extremely helpful. So that's what this note is about, reaching out to you guys to see what you would like to see in this story. I will not be able to continue this, and I know it's not very fair of me to ask, but ANY ideas at all would be welcomed. The more ideas I get from people, the faster I'll be able to update! So please-HELP me! Thank you soooo very much,

Sara 3


	22. DA Meeting

**A/N: Hey, guys. So, obviously I've decided to continue this story, and I want to thank all of you reviewers who changed my mind about abandoning this! Again, thank you so much! This chapter will be a super short, as I don't really know where to go from here, but all of the action will all start in the next couple of chapters. Let me see, there will probably be about 7-9 more chapter before this story is over, so stick with me here!**

!#$%^

The rest of breakfast passed by quickly, and was filled with simple small talk. Despite the comfort of being around my friends, I couldn't shake the feeling of dread that had overcome me ever since I had heard that Dolohov was out of Azkaban. I just had a bad feeling about it, and over time I had learned to trust my honed instincts. Something bad was going to happen that involves Dolohov; I just knew it!

The day flew by after that, and I spent most of it wrapped in my own little thoughts about things. Harry seemed worried about me, but I always shook him off. He didn't need to know my whole life's sob story. And it would only make him worry even more about me, which was something we both didn't need.

The D.A. lesson came up pretty quickly, and soon enough, I was on my way from my classes to the seventh floor. I was early, as usual, but when I heard talking, I slowed down.

Harry and Neville were talking, and hadn't noticed me come in. I hid in a corner, in order to better hear what they were talking about. After standing there for a couple of minutes, I caught on. They were talking about Neville's parents being tortured by Bellatrix Lestrange. I could easily see why Neville had been upset at the breakout, I'm sure he was almost as upset as I was.

I felt a sudden pang go through my chest at the thought of what Bellatrix did to Neville's parents. She was my adoptive aunt of sorts, and I felt a certain responsibility for her actions. I knew that I couldn't control her even if I wanted to, but still. I _knew_ her, and that made me feel disgusting. But wasn't I supposed to be on their side? I was supposed to be smiling at the thought of what she did, instead of cringing.

So who's side was I _really_ on?

"Atarah! I didn't see you come in!" Harry's voice shocked me out of my thoughts, and I shook my head, ridding myself of any negative thoughts. I smiled brightly at him, despite my true feelings.

"Hey Harry. Are we working on Patronuses today?" Even though I already asked him earlier today, I had nothing else to say. He tilted his head at me, but answered anyways.

"Umm, yeah. Do you have it down?" He asked. I smiled once again, a true smile this time. I laughed slightly, and then shook my head.

"Nope. Almost there though!" In truth I really wasn't, I could barely muster up enough energy to even think about my happiest moment. I had been unsuccessful in producing a Patronus so far, and I didn't think I'd be able to produce one today. But I didn't tell Harry that.

People started filtering in the room, and I knew that today would be interesting.

**A/N: Sorry for it being sooooo sooo short! I've never written a chapter this short before, but it's because I still have Writer's Block for this story. I am surprised I even got this out. If you have any advice on where to go from here, please go right ahead and tell me!**


	23. Yet Another Note

Hey guys! So, I didn't get very many reviews for the last chapter, which I completely understand. It was super short and probably a waste of your time to read. But anyways, since not many of you care either way, I'm going to take a break in writing this, to go back and edit the whole thing. My writing has matured since I have started this, and I believe that the story would flow better if it was edited. Maybe it will also attract new readers, but I'm not sure. But anyways, for those of you who are still even reading this story, I am sooo sorry for everything! I have been horrible to you guys, and I am hoping that by going back and editing everything, I will gain a new inspiration to write even more. Please, I need to keep a count, so if you are still willing to read this story, leave it in a review. I need to know how many people I am writing for. Thank you guys so much, and I am so sorry for all of the trouble I caused for you guys, and I hope you can forgive me!

xoxoxoxo

Sara 3


	24. Caught

A/N: Hey guys, so I have good news! I started editing my story, and got new inspiration to write a new chapter. And just so you guys know, these series are based more off of the movies, because I don't have time to go through and re-read the book, but I DO have time to go through the movie. So sorry if that bothers you, but that's what works for me. This chapter is a bit short, but not as short as the last chapter, thank God for that, right? But anyways, here's chapter 21 of Against All Odds! I personally don't think that it's that good, but that's for you to decide. There's quite a bit of Atarah/Harry in this one, though, since I didn't have any for a while. It's really cheesy, I know, before you say anything, but I absolutely love cheesy things, so sorry if that bothers you.

**!#$%^**

Once everyone was in the room and waiting silently, I walked up to the front of the classroom and began to speak to the group.

"Okay, people! So as you might have heard, we'll be working on Patronuses once again. Fun, right? So if everyone could be quiet, I'll pass this over to someone who actually knows what the hell he's talking about. Harry, if you will..." I gestured towards Harry, who stepped to the front, where I had been standing just moments before.

Harry cleared his throat, and smiled at the small crowd gathered around him.

"Alright then, after Atarah started us off, I guess I'll continue..." I smiled involuntarily; Harry was so _cute_ when he was nervous.

"Well, since no one can keep secrets around here, you all know about us working on the Patronuses, right?" He asked. The kids in the crowd nodded back at him, and he was about to continue with his speech when a voice cut him off.

"Speaking of secrets," It was Parvarti who spoke.

"Are you and Atarah dating?"

My heart nearly stopped at those five simple words, and I felt my blood go ice cold. This was exactly what I wanted to _avoid_, but _really_? Shouldn't I have been _expecting_ it? First we were caught holding hands when we walked into the class, and then we went to the ball together, which ended up on the front page of the Daily Prophet just a day later. People were bound to talk.

But really? Would it be so bad if we _were_ dating? I mean, I obviously have feelings for him, and he has feelings for me. Yeah, we are on different sides of the war, and yeah, I am sort of spying on him for Voldemort. But hey? What's the worst that could happen?

A lot, I suppose. But that's not the point!

Harry was too busy staring at me, searching for my own reaction, to answer Parvarti, so I took a deep breath and spoke up for the both of us.

"Well, that's for him to decide," I lowered my head, and then looked up through my thick lashes at Harry, who was beaming at me. I sent him a small smile, that let him know that it was okay. He laughed, and turned to the front again.

"Well, then. I believe this is long overdue," He strode over to where I was standing, and took my hands in his own. I blushed furiously, but tried to hide it from everyone else who was staring at us.

"Atarah Lily Serena Natalie Manston," He looked into my light green eyes with a passion I've only ever read about in books. His lips curled into a slight half smile, and the sight of him so close to me made my heart flutter uncontrollably.

"Will you go out with me?"

Not waiting a second more than I absolutely had to, I launched myself at him, and he caught me with open arms. The embrace itself made me want to giggle and scream out with joy. I had never met a boy like Harry before, and I wasn't about to let him go. Especially when I had a chance to keep him.

"Yes." My answer was simple, but it said everything that I needed it to.

At this point, I realized that everyone was still watching us. The only reason why I noticed, however, was because the instant I said yes, they cheered us on. There were wolf whistles from the guys, and loud "awww's" coming from the girls, including Hermione. Looking over Harry's shoulder, I saw that Parvarti was smiling with pride written all over her face, and Ron was just standing there awkwardly, with a tiny smile on his lips.

I quickly unwrapped myself from Harry's arms, and tried to play it cool. I failed miserably. I was so happy at this point in time, that I laughed and smiled until my cheeks hurt from the effort.

Part of me, though, wanted to curl up in a corner and cry.

I just got myself deeper into this mess, and now I can't get out, even if I tried to. If Harry ever found out about my betrayal, I'd lose something that I treasured more than my own life. But then again, what if he never found out? What then? Then I would have to live with the guilt of betraying someone who didn't even know he was being betrayed. But I shook my head, trying to think of lighter topics. This was a good day, and I didn't want to ruin it by thinking negatively. Besides:

Harry Potter is my _boyfriend_.

Just thinking that in my head made shivers run down my spine, and an automatic smile played at my pink lips. There's my answer. I never did anything for _me_, it was always for someone else. And now, I was finally going to do something about it, and nothing could stop me.

I looked over at Harry, who was still staring at me with a look of adoration. Part of me didn't even think it was possible for someone to like me so much, but apparently it was. I had living proof standing right next to me.

After the cheering was over, and Harry and I were done ogling each other, he stepped back to the center of the room, and cleared his throat. He was still smiling as he talked.

"Alright everyone. Let's get started."

**!#$%^**

"Make it a powerful memory, the happiest you can remember," Harry wandered around the classroom, trying to get people to get a good enough memory. I wasn't teaching this time, as I didn't know what the heck I was doing, but I was still trying my hardest. I kept trying to think of my happiest memory, but in a way, my happiest memory is also the saddest moment in my entire life.

So every time I thought of Rose, and the guest house, I felt like bursting into tears. I gritted my teeth, getting annoyed because I wasn't able to do it right. Why was this happening to me? Huh? Why couldn't I just do the damn spell?

"Allow it to fill you up," Harry's words encouraged me, and I tried to do as he suggested. Let it fill me up, fill me up..._come on!_

"Keep trying Seamus,"

Harry had just now gotten over to where I was standing, and he surprised me by putting his arms around my waist.

I nearly fainted at his touch. This was really Harry right? The Harry that was too shy to ask Cho Chang out? And now he was showing physical affection for me, in front of everyone else here?

"Harry!" I gasped. My thoughts were now completely erratic and jumbled up.

"What?" He sounded worried, probably worried that I didn't want him to touch me, when that _so _wasn't the case. I took a deep breath, knowing that I wouldn't be able to concentrate with Harry nearby.

"You're distracting me..." I muttered. Then, all of a sudden, it came to me. What if he wasn't distracting me? What if, _he _ was my happiest memory? When was my happiest moment? It _had_ to be something to do with Harry, it had to! He was what made me the happiest. Now, looking back on it, I realized all of the times he had made me laugh, the first time I kissed him, and when we were dancing together at the ball, completely unaware of anything else that was around us.

I closed my eyes, and knew exactly what I was doing. Somehow, by thinking of Harry, performing this spell felt just right.

I opened my eyes, and raised my wand.

"_Expecto Patronum!_"

A explosion of white light burst out of the tip of my wand, and formed into a complete Patronus. I smiled at the sight of its delicate figure, its graceful movements as it walked in a small circle in front of me, before letting out a soundless howl.

It was a _wolf_.

I had never thought that my Patronus would take the form of a wolf before, as it never seemed to fit me. I'd thought I'd get something like a rat, seeing as I'm nothing but a traitor and a spineless coward. But my joy at seeing my Patronus just grew and grew, and Harry let go of me, beaming like he had just seen his child speak for the first time. I missed his arms around my waist, but was too embarrassed to admit it to myself.

"I knew you could do it. I knew it," He smiled.

I was going to speak to him, but there was a weird noise that seemed to shake the whole room. The lights flickered for a second, and the chandelier above us wobbled. My smile faded, and I knew instantly that something was wrong. Nothing like this ever happened before, and the Room of Requirement wouldn't let anything happen to it. So what was wrong?

The sound got louder, and it shook everything inside of the room, the mirrors on the wall rattling dangerously. The lights went out again as another shake went through the room. Harry gripped my hand in his own, and we walked carefully towards the source of the noise, one of the walls that were covered by mirrors. As we walked closer to it, cracks appeared and spread across the wall, before shattering completely. I winced as the glass hit the floor, but held onto Harry's hand tighter.

Once the glass was gone, we could see a small hole in the wall, enough to get a peak at what was on the other side. I went to look through, but Harry held me back. Still holding my hand, he walked forward and snuck a peek.

"I'll make short work of this," It was Umbridge's voice. She was trying to break through! That evil little toad woman!

"_Bombarda Maxima!_" Harry realized what was happening just a second too late, and he pulled me away from the exploding wall. Much like last time there was an explosion, he wrapped his arms around my waist, and shielded me from the rubble and debris.

With him still holding onto me for dear life, we turned to face the wall, trying to see what else had happened. When the dust had cleared, we saw Umbridge with a proud look on her face, and her little gang behind her. I didn't see Draco at first, but after a second he came into my sight, holding Cho by her robes.

The second he saw me, his eyes widened. Knowing him like the back of my hand, I'd say that he was first surprised to see me there, as I had lied to him about knowing Harry's plan. Then, when his eyes hardened, I knew that he took in who I was with. Harry was still holding onto me, with his arms wrapped around my waist. I should have pulled away the second he saw me with him, but I only shrank back into Harry, hiding my face in his shoulder.

"_Get them_."

**!#$%^**

A/N: Hey guys! So, just asking for people who haven't already answered, should Sirius die? I'm so conflicted about it! And should Sirius and Rayanne meet again? The most important question, however, is what do you want to see more or less of? Draco? Harry/Atarah? Sirius? Rayanne? Let me know, my little wizards :)


	25. A Reunion

A/N: Hey guys, so I wanted to get this out pretty quick. So thanks to the people who reviewed my story, for all your lovely advice! I will take it all into consideration, because I really _do_ need to figure out what's going to happen, and soon. Not much going on in this chapter, I'm afraid, but I do still need to get it out there. Sooooo, here's the nest chapter :) OH! And before I forget, I _totally _ misjudged the amount of chapters left. Now that I finally know where I'm going with this, I have a good estimation. There'll be about 3, maybe 4 chapters left until this story is over, and then comes the sequel! Please people, it would mean so much if you'd stick with this story until the end, it would make me soooo happy! Thank you guys!

**!#$%^**

Draco went straight for me, which was shocking to me. How dare he have the nerve to approach me after what he did at the dance! How could he be so inconsiderate about how I felt about him right now? He was slowly becoming a man I didn't know, and that scared me. He had been my best friend since we were both little, and now I didn't know _what_ he was to me anymore.

"Get your hands _off_ of her Potter." He spat. He acted like he had some say over who could hold me. Now that I was a little bit pissed off, I smirked at his familiar face, wanting more than anything to make him go away.

"Sod off, Malfoy!" I glared at him while I spoke. This was the first time I had ever called him by his last name, but this time, I had good reason to. _Apparently_ I didn't know him well enough to call him Draco. He flinched when he heard me say his last name, and stood there in shock, until Umbridge appeared over his shoulder, with Percy Weasley in tow.

"Mister Weasley, Mister Malfoy. If you would please escort Miss Manston and Mister Potter to Dumbledore's office," Her sickly sweet voice annoyed me to no end. I wish she would just crawl up in a hole and die already! Only taking a second to respond, Draco grabbed me by my shirt, and yanked me away from Harry.

"Hey! Don't touch her like that, you _bastard_!" Harry shouted at Draco as Percy dragged him away.

Draco hesitated for a moment, pushing me down the hallway slowly, so that way we were behind the others.

"What were you doing with him?" He whispered in my ear.

"You have no right to say in who I can and cannot date!" I whispered back. He stopped for just a second.

"You're _dating_ him?" He couldn't believe it. That sick bastard.

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I _am_. And if you don't like it then you can just go jump off the Astronomy Tower for all I care..." He let out a quick breath before continuing down the hallway, his grip around my shirt tightening. He was going to ruin my shirt! And it was one of my best shirts, as well!

"Why are you acting like this? What happened to my best friend?" He sounded sad, and his pain cause my mindset towards him to falter. What _happened_ to me? Just a few months ago, I was perfectly fine with being the "Ice Queen" at Hogwarts, bullying people and starting rumors just for the sake of my reputation. I _enjoyed_ it. More than enjoyed it, I loved it! It was what I did! And then, on that one day, Harry came over to my table to insult Malfoy. I intervened, and he insulted my family. I lost it, and yada yada yada, and we end up here. Did I ever expect to end up here? Never. Did I regret ending up here?

No. I can't even picture my life had it not ended up here.

"Well, Malfoy, your "best friend", no longer exists, so suck it up and move on. I'm not who I used to be, and you aren't either. People change, Malfoy, so get used to it..." He sucked in a breath, but quickly recovered. He shoved me forward, almost knocking me to the ground.

Well then. This ought to be fun.

**!#$%^**

**Sirius Black's POV**

**!#$%^**

He was wandering the streets as he usually did, in his animagus form. He was bored of being kept locked up in that bloody house, and this was the only freedom he could get. And, _no_, he wasn't _stupid_, he knew why he couldn't go out in human form, but damn it, he could still be upset! And it was while he was wandering the streets that he picked up a curious scent. At first, he was confused. He hadn't picked up that scent it _years_, so how could he pick it up now? Had his nose gone mad?

But then he turned his head, and saw her.

He saw Rayanne Manston, walking delicately towards him. She hadn't noticed him yet, so he quickly ducked into the shadows. His mind was reeling, and he didn't know what to do or think about any of this. He hadn't seen her in so many years, that now, when he looked at her face, he swore that he heard angels singing somewhere.

He watched as she stopped walking for a moment, and he took this opportunity to look at her. Her face was delicate and heart shaped, and made everyone else look plain in comparison, despite her age. And her eyes, oh those _eyes_! Whenever he saw those eyes he swore he could faint. Thinking about her eyes, he remembered seeing those eyes on someone else; Atarah Manston.

The minutes he laid eyes on Rayanne's girl, he wanted to burst into tears at the sight. She was a dead ringer for Rayanne. Sirius shook his head. Why think of someone who looked like her when you have the real thing right in front of you?

Gazing at her womanly curves, Sirius was thrown back into a time from Hogwarts, a moment in time that he would never forget. Ever.

_He was walking with James, Remus, and Peter when he saw her sitting there. She was a pretty little thing, with a nice figure and long flowing blonde hair. As he watched, she opened a book, and began to read, tucking a stray hair behind her ear. He decided then that he would make his move. Whispering to his group of friends, he asked:_

_ "Who's that hot girl over there? The one reading the book too large to be real?" _

_ James laughed at him. _

_ "Grey? You want to make a move on Rayanne _Grey_? My, my, you do have guts after all!" James shook his head. Sirius was confused, what the hell were they talking about?_

_ "So Rayanne's her name then. Why? Would making a move on her be that bad?" _

_ Remus shook his head at him. _

_ "She's a Slytherin, Sirius..." _

_ "So? All I'm looking for is a good shag!" He exclaimed. James laughed even harder. _

_ "Mate, maybe she's not the one to ask..." He trailed off, laughing once again as Sirius made his way over to her. _

_ Sirius ran a hand through his hair, and threw on his sexiest half smile. He sat down next to her, and cleared his throat._

_ She didn't even look up from her book. _

_ Trying again, he held out his hand, blocking her view from her book._

_ "I'm Sirius," No response, other than her knocking his hand away from her book. Now he was out right startled. How was this not working? He shook his head, and tried once again. _

_ "I'm-" _

_ "I know who you are, you've said it enough times you slobbering pig," She stood up, gathering her things._

_ "But your friend James over there is a looker. Maybe you could introduce me sometime..." With a gentle wink, she walked away. By now, all of his friends were just about rolling on the floor laughing at his failed attempt. _

_ Nice one, Sirius..._

That was the first time he had spoken to Rayanne Manston, formally Rayanne Grey. It was an experience he'd never forget, not in his entire lifetime. By now, Rayanne had moved on without Sirius noticing, so he frantically looked around to see her retreating figure.

He trotted as quietly as her could, but it was still loud enough for her to turn her head in his direction.

With startled eyes, she gasped.

"Sirius?" She covered her mouth the second she spoke his name, but it was too late. He had heard her. He remembered something Atarah had said, something about Rayanne still being in love with him.

_"That woman hasn't told me anything since she told me she loved you."_

Those were her exact words, he recalled. And now, he hoped that they were true, because he was betting everything on it. He returned to his human form, and slowly began to walk towards her. Rayanne gasped once again, and stumbled back some, nearly tripping.

He didn't stop, just continued walking towards her, until he was only a foot away. They stood, silent, not wanting to risk breaking the tension in the air. Finally, Rayanne raised a hand to his cheek, letting it linger there for a while.

"Sirius, I-"

His lips crashed down onto hers. They kissed passionately, their souls uniting once again. Neither of them wanted it to end, as Rayanne wrapped her arms around him, trying to get closer to him, never wanting to let him go. Sirius held onto her for dear life, thinking that if he let her go he'd lose her again.

He was thrown back in time once again.

_"Come on, Ray!" Sirius spoke, using the nickname Rayanne oh so hated. He had been trying to catch her attention for weeks now, but he always seemed to fail. At first it was about a good shag, but now she had actually caught his _attention_. She wasn't just a _mission_ anymore, but a real person that he admired. _

_ Rayanne shook her head at him, and got back to reading her book. They were sitting in the library, with Rayanne sitting in a chair, and Sirius sitting on the table. Sirius grabbed the book from her, and held it high above Rayanne's head. Rayanne made a move to grab it, but after a few attempts she knew it was useless. _

_ "I'll ask you again; Rayanne Grey, will you go out with me?" He smirked. Rayanne sighed, and held her head in her hands. She knew that fighting would just be a waste of time. _

_ "You can ask and ask again, you mutt! I'll still say _no_!" With that she got up, and started to walk away, not caring if Sirius still had her book or not. _

_ "Rayanne!" He ran out after her. They were walking down a hallway when he ran up to her, and put his arms on both sides of her head, leaning against the wall. _

_ "Please?" He had never said please in his life, and yet, there was something about this girl that made him want to say it a million times. _

_ "But, you're in Gryffindor! It would never work out..."_

_ "Oh really? I bet you won't be saying that in another ten seconds," And with that, he lowered his lips onto hers. _

They had kept their relationship in secret since then, and hid it from the rest of the world. Sirius swore that he'd never forget Rayanne Grey, and still to this day, even when she was Rayanne Manston, he was in love with her.

They broke apart, gasping for air. He touched his forehead to hers, and held it there, completely silent.

"Come away with me. Join the Order. I'll protect you, and your girl. I swear, I won't let any of those bastards touch a hair on your head," He whispered to her, begging her to run away with him. Rayanne shook her head.

"I can't..." She sighed.

"Please. We could start a new life together. I know you want this, too. Please," He begged once again. Rayanne gulped down air, and thought about it. She could live with the one that she loved, and her daughter would be safe as well.

"O-Okay," She nodded.

Sirius took her hand in his, and together, they walked towards a new life.

A/N: Hey guys, so how'd you like it? Good, not good? All of you guys wanted to see Rayanne and Sirius get together, so I put that in this chapter. So, here's a question for you guys: How many of you are going to read the sequel to this story? Just wanted a head count of how many people still follow this story. SO, what do you want to happen next?

xoxo

Sara


	26. Escapes and Confrontations

**A/N: Hey guys! So this story is almost over, so I just want to thank all of my lovely reviewers for sticking with this story until the very end. Here's the next chapter!**

**!#$%^**

Draco practically had to carry me the entire way to Dumbledore's office. I wasn't about to go voluntarily, so I made sure to drag my feet the whole way there, forcing Draco to shove me forward several times. I shot Harry a reassuring look, trying to seem like I knew that everything would be okay. Truthfully, I had no idea how this was going to play out. Maybe we would both be expelled, or maybe we would only get Dumbledore into trouble. Oh God, what would happen to Dumbledore? After all, it did say _Dumbledore's Army_ on the piece of paper that held everyone's names on it. I couldn't live with myself if we got Dumbledore in trouble! But he could handle himself, I'm sure, I tried to convince myself.

Soon enough, Harry and I stumbled behind Umbridge and Cornelius, who had shown up just moments after we had been busted. They barged into the office, not bothering to knock. Dumbledore was just sitting in his chair, his eyes saying that he knew everything. How did he always know everything? I swear, you couldn't surprise that man even if you didn't tell a soul anything. He always seemed to figure things out.

"I've been watching them for weeks!" Umbridge shrieked at the man beside her, obviously proud of her accomplishment. I bit my lip and shook my head, looking away from them. Somehow my vision landed on Harry, and he smiled weakly over at me. A warm feeling went through me at his smile, and I knew that everything would be okay, as long as we were together. We could make it through this. Draco noticed me smiling at Harry, and shoved me. I glared back at his grey eyes, and hoped that he would go die in a hole somewhere very far away from me.

"And see, 'Dumbledore's Army'! Proof of what I've been telling you right from the beginning, Cornelius," Umbridge finally looked up at Dumbledore, who was sitting there like he was talking with an old friend, calm and peaceful.

"All your fear-mongering about You-Know-Who never fooled us for a minute We saw your lies for what they were: a smokescreen for your bid to seize control of the Ministry!" She screeched at the wise old man, not caring that she sounded like a dying cat when she talked. I swear, I wanted to hit her over the head with something every time she opened up her fat toad like mouth.

What shocked me, however, was Dumbledore's response.

"Naturally,"

I froze. What the hell was he doing? He couldn't admit to doing this, he didn't even know about it! It was _my_ fault! I agreed to help Harry, and now he was taking the fall for it! It wasn't his job to baby us, we could handle ourselves!

"No, professor! He had nothing to do with it, it was me!" Harry cried out, trying to protect Dumbledore, like I knew he would do. Sometimes he was so predictable.

"Dumbledore? You had nothing to do with this! _Why_?" I asked softly, not believing that he would take the fall for us. Two students, who most likely deserved to be punished, and _he_ was saving us! He looked over at me, seeing the question clear in my eyes. He smiled gently, and my heart shattered. Did he truly care about us that much, that he would risk going to _Azkaban_ just to keep us out of trouble? I was moved, and had to shake my head to clear my thoughts.

"Most noble of you, Harry, Atarah, to shield me, but as it has been pointed out, the parchment clearly says '_Dumbledore's Army_', not '_Potter's_'," He spoke to Harry, before turning back to Umbridge and Cornelius. My lips turned down into a frown, and I shook my head, begging him not to do this to himself, but I knew that it was too late.

"I instructed Harry and Atarah to form this organization, and I, and I _alone_, am responsible for its activities." He said. I winced at his words, and my shoulders slumped downwards. What were we going to _do_ now? Umbridge was seemingly glowing with pride and happiness, and even Cornelius seemed happy. I guess they really didn't like Dumbledore, but were they _that_ stupid to believe that Dumbledore would actually want to take over the _Ministry_? They must be more stupid than I had originally thought.

"Dispatch an owl to the Daily Prophet. If we hurry, we should still make the morning edition," Cornelius sighed, trying to calm himself down. He motioned to the two men standing beside him, and pointed at Dumbledore.

"Dawlish, Shacklebolt, you will escort Dumbledore to Azkaban to await trial for conspiracy and sedition." By the time he was finished talking, my mouth was wide open. They couldn't do this!

"No!" I tried to lunge forward, but Draco held onto my arms, his grip tight. I thrashed about, not about to let them take him. "You can't do that! You can't take him - he did nothing wrong! Take me instead! I started it! Take me!" I shouted, not caring what I said, just trying to get them to leave him alone.

Draco pulled me back to him, covering my mouth with his hand.

"Are you insane? Stop it!" He tried to calm me down. I bit down on his hand as hard as I could, and he yelped, but didn't let me go. Umbridge and Cornelius didn't notice me struggling, as they were too busy zeroing in on Dumbledore. I continued thrashing about, trying to do anything to get them away from Dumbledore. Harry looked like he was about to do something drastic, but Dumbledore stood up, and shook his head at us. I immediately stopped fighting. I was trying to _help_ him, and he wanted me to stop? What was that about? But I listened to him anyways, and watched this play out in front of my eyes.

"Ah, I thought we might hit this little snag," He took a step back from the people that were closing in on him. He tilted his head in amusement.

"You seem to be laboring under the delusion that I'm going to..." He paused. "What was the phrase? Ah, _come quietly_. Well, I can tell you this: I have no intention of going to Azkaban," He spoke with humor in his eyes. Umbridge was clearly getting nervous, and sweat was running down her face.

"Enough of this! Take him!" She screamed. Just as the two men were about to grab Dumbledore, Fawkes flew above him, and he reached up. With a flash of bright light, Dumbledore was gone. _Gone_.

Everyone was silent, amazed over what had happened. In the process of Dumbledore escaping, Draco had released his hold of me, and I had wandered over to where Harry stood. He looked down at me with a grin on his face before taking my hand in his own.

"Well you may not like him, minister, but you can't deny: Dumbledore has got _style_."

I let out a laugh as Cornelius sputtered out a response, and leaned into Harry's strong frame for comfort.

Umbridge and the Minister were pretty shaken up after that, and they wanted to punish us, but they couldn't do anything more than assign detention for everyone in the D.A., which I knew we could handle.

We left Dumbledore's office grinning, knowing that Dumbledore was somewhere that they couldn't find him. Of course, I knew instantly that life without him would be hell, and Umbridge would take over the school, but I could be happy for the little things, right?

Harry never once let go of my hand as we walked together to the Slytherin common room. I know, I know! How lucky was I to have a _Gryffindor_ that would walk me to the _Slytherin_ common room. If you weren't a Slytherin, you wouldn't go anywhere near our "home base". Otherwise, you would most likely end up being jinxed by one of the older students. But Harry was my guest, so I figured that it would be fine.

As we walked up to the entrance, Harry let go of my hand, but started closing the distance between our lips.

"Goodnight, Atarah," He whispered to me, before crashing his lips down onto my own. It was a short but sweet kiss, and it said so much that we couldn't express in mere words. We broke apart, and grinned at each other like little kids.

"Goodnight, Potter. Try not to get eaten by some of the other Slytherins on your way out." I said, before pecking him on the lips once more. I smiled, and left him standing outside of the entrance.

I couldn't help but smile as I was walking down the narrow hallway to the common room, Harry just had that effect on me. I didn't know what was happening to me lately. First I hate him, then I have a crush on him, and now what? Was I in love with him?

I quickly shook my head. It wasn't that serious yet, but at the rate we were heading, I wouldn't be surprised if that came sooner than I expected.

I was about to go up to my room, but I found the path blocked by someone.

_Pansy_.

I glowered at her, hoping that that would make her move, but it only made it worse. I sighed, and stepped back, not wanting to fight anymore. I was too worn out.

"What do you want, Pansy?" My voice sounded tired, just like how I felt. I was sick and tired of us fighting all of the time. The only reason why she hated me before was because I was Draco's best friend. But now that we weren't even talking, I didn't see what the problem was. Pansy just crossed her arms, and stared pointedly over my shoulder.

I turned around to see three other girls surrounding me, with some guys watching closely. I gulped. What was going on here?

"We want to know what's going on between you and Potter. We're not stupid, and now that you've practically gone public with that little stunt outside, we're even more _curious_. Why are you even hanging around that... _thing_?" She drawled on in her little 'I'm better than you' tone. Quite honestly, I wanted to punch her right now. So why didn't I? I could get away with it, if I really wanted to...

"Pansy, I can't tell you. It could quite literally get me _killed_ if I talk about it. Now, will you _move_?" I asked her, getting a little impatient with her. One of the girls behind me spoke up, and I thought her name was something along the lines of Astoria. I couldn't really remember, as we never really talked before. A couple of months ago I would have considered her beneath a person of my status. But now, I just wanted them to leave me alone.

"We're not moving until you tell us!" She cried out. The other two beside her nodded in agreement.

"Yeah."

"Not moving."

I sighed, knowing that I probably shouldn't be doing this, but I did it anyways, my patience having been used up a while ago.

"Listen to me, and listen closely," I started, and they practically closed in on me. I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, Pansy? You need to get your head out of your ass and stop pining over Draco. Never gonna happen, so might as well get used to rejection with that ugly little face of yours. As for you three? I suggest you stop wearing so much makeup, before you end up looking like a fucking toy doll. And stop being so damn nosy, because it's none of your _fucking_ business what I do with Harry Potter. Now, why don't you go do something useful, like read a book or something, or actually study for a change..."

I pushed past Pansy, and marched up the stairs. God, they could be so _annoying_ sometimes! I don't know how I put up with them before now. I sighed, and changed into my pajamas. I hopped into bed, and fell asleep thinking about the way Harry's lips had felt on my own.

**A/N: Hey guys, sorry for the wait, I lost my inspiration, but now it's back! I stayed up all night trying to write this, and it's now 6 in the morning, so I'm just a little tired. Anyways, I need one last vote before I write the next couple of chapters. Should I kill Sirius? Why or why not? I've gotten some awesome answers from you guys already, but I'm like one chapter away from when I need to decide, so I need help, **_**desperately**_**. Thank you, my little wizards! :D**


	27. An Apologetic Note

**Hey guys, so I know I haven't updated in an unbelievably long time, so not a lot of people are still reading this, which I understand. And quite honestly, I can't believe people would even read this piece of junk when I updated regularly. It was one of the first stories I had ever written, and my grammar clearly shows that. I don't even know if there's any saving this, but I'm going to go back and edit everything. If I end up liking the story again I'll probably continue it, but that'll take a while to figure out. I need to straighten everything out first; plot holes, OOC people, the **HUGE** Mary Sue that Atarah has become, and lots of other things like that. Well, I just wanted to post this to let people know that I haven't completely given up hope. Soo yeah.**

**Peace and Love and Rainbows and Unicorns,**

**Sara :D**


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Harry Potter, Drama, Romance