Big Bang Theory 1. Chapter 1

The Chaos Cognizance

Summary: Admitting the truth to others is difficult. Then there is the matter of admitting it to yourself. Sheldon Cooper discovers that you can't run from your feelings forever. When Amy suffers a near death experience after a trauma, it leaves Sheldon reeling. What happens next will shake the foundation of what is most important in their lives. And who.

A/N- Welcome to my little story. I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

~Chapter 1~

"…When the lights go out it's just the three of us – you, me and all that stuff we're so scared of…" Bruce Springsteen – Tunnel of Love

He could not find an open door.

Some jiggled upon their hinges.

Some were airlock tight.

Some knobs gave the illusion of turning, but no tumbler was cooperating.

Locked. Bolted. Secured.

Sheldon ran from corridor to corridor, frantically trying to gain access through the immovable sentinels.

He tried to jimmy the lock. No success.

He moved on to the next door using his body weight to shove it open, with the same futile results.

Growing frustrated, he began to pound his fists upon the next door he tried.

"Please…open up," he shouted, his frantic voice echoing down the long expanse. He had no idea why he wanted the doors open, nor what lay on the other side. Yet the fear and insecurity drove him onward, door after door's mysteries remaining hidden from him.

Suddenly Sheldon heard a noise behind him, and he turned sharply. His eyes tried desperately to adjust as he squinted against the blinding light, yet the light was too white and pure. He closed his eyes to block it out, feeling surprise and a modicum of relief when he recognized the voice which addressed him kindly.

"It's no u-use, Sheldon. They won't budge. You haven't got the r-right key."

Sheldon started at Professor Proton's cryptic words, but in his confusion, was too distraught to even offer him a salutation.

"The right key?" He repeated, looking in his hand at the large key ring which appeared out of nowhere. It must have held at least a hundred keys, yet it felt as light as a feather. He jingled the ring, a slight chime ringing out.

"Where did these come from? What on Earth is happening here? Won't any of these-"

"They won't fit. Don't even t-try. They are not meant to open these doors for you. They are meant for others," the Professor interjected.

Sheldon huffed in annoyance. Surely with all of these keys, the law of averages had to factor in somewhere.

"If they are not meant for me, then why am I carrying them?" He reasoned, his voice holding a challenging lilt.

Professor Proton sat down in a chair which a few moments ago wasn't even there. Sheldon blinked rapidly as he watched his mentor get comfortable, his stocky stature finally coming into focus as the overwhelming light diminished. He wasn't wearing Jedi robes like last time he appeared to Sheldon, but his customary suit and bowtie. He gave Sheldon a sad smile, shaking his head.

"That's a good q-question, Sheldon. Why indeed. Sometimes we hold onto things that no longer work for us, because we are too afraid to let them go. Too afraid to embrace what does work, what we have been denying all along. Sometimes we walk through a thousand doors, a million…but we never reach the destination we are truly looking for. There's a saying I'm s-sure you're familiar with. All roads lead to Rome. But you know in your heart of hearts that's not always t-true. Don't you?"

Sheldon wasn't even aware that he was freezing, yet suddenly the chill in the air turned even colder. He looked down at himself, wondering why he was dressed so threadbare. Barefooted, with only his flash t shirt and a pair of boxer shorts.

Was this some sort of metaphor, he wondered? If he were as astute as he thought he was, he would have to have chalked this particular one up to being naked. Vulnerable. That in turn made him feel uneasy and afraid. And as of late, in spite of all of the other tumult going on in his life, there was only one area that made him more off kilter than all the rest.

"Arthur…why are you here?" He asked his idol, fear creeping into his voice. The elderly Professor smiled softly at Sheldon, tilting his head sideways.

"Why do you think I'm here, Sheldon? I suppose, it's to give you advice. Help you through another dilemma. Is there something weighing heavily on your mind these days?" He asked knowingly, knocking the wind out of Sheldon's lungs. Oh, dear.

"We aren't talking about keys in the literal sense, are we Professor?" He asked meekly, his heart beginning to pound. Even his mentor's kind eyes and steady presence could not bring him a level of comfort.

Arthur's expression softened.

"No, son. We're not. You can search every door in here forever, using every key. But all will be for n-naught. None of these keys will fit, because they aren't meant to. There is only one key, Sheldon. And you must use that one.

So here we are again, Sheldon thought with dread. Closing his eyes, he exhaled a huge sigh of agitation. This was about what that psychic said about Amy.

It had taken him months of denial, but he thought he finally had a handle on this. He should have known better. As with Schrodinger's cat, just because you say there is no cat in the box doesn't mean there isn't one. And if you leave it in there long enough, it will begin to reek.

Sheldon sat on the floor next to his beloved Professor, at a loss. All roads didn't lead to Rome. Only one road led to it, and he was terrified to travel that path.

"Where will I find this key?" He asked quietly, already knowing the answer. Already fearing the answer.

Professor Proton was not unkind. He knew his biggest fan's struggles with life, and even though he hadn't planned on spending eternity appearing when he needed him, he had to admit that it wasn't entirely tedious. He never realized before how intelligent Sheldon really was. When he wasn't saying wholly inappropriate things, of course. Arthur found that he rather enjoyed being Jiminy Cricket to Sheldon's Pinocchio.

He put his hand gently upon Sheldon's shoulder.

"Sheldon…you are a brilliant man. I don't have to tell you this. But I think s-sometimes, you avoid what is right in front of your face. Remaining deliberately obtuse is not the answer, son. So I will spell it out for you, and I won't sugar coat it. The key you seek, lies with her. It always has. It always will. Let her in. Maybe even let her have a piece of that heart beating inside of your chest. You won't be sorry, I can assure you. It's time, Sheldon. Far past time. You never even knew what hit you the day you walked into that coffee shop, did you? She is your future, and your hope. With her, you will achieve things you never imagined. Marriage. Children. Maybe even that Nobel you covet so much. Do you really think you can go it alone, now that you know what she means to you? Now that you know the truth?"

Sheldon's eyes narrowed in agitation, and he let out a loud humph.

"The truth? What am I supposed to do with this truth? Arthur, I'm not prepared to deal with this. I don't know how. I just…" He sputtered, running his hands up and down his arms to warm the frozen limbs. He gazed at this mentor in trepidation.

"You'll know what to do when the time is r-right, Sheldon. When that time comes, you must be strong. Put aside these childish whims and just do what is required."

_Required? What…?_

Sheldon blinked rapidly, the image of Professor Proton beginning to fade. He scurried to his knees from his sitting position, trying to hold onto his idol just a moment longer.

"Arthur please, don't go. I'm so confused. Please help me. Tell me…how am I supposed to do this and not lose myself?" He begged, trying desperately to see the Professor through the haze and light.

His image faded completely, the light fading along with him. All that was left was a dark, empty space that stretched on for eternity. Sheldon felt cold, alone, and more confused than ever.

Falling in a heap on the cold floor, he hung his head low and began to hyperventilate. Everything felt like it was moving at 600 miles an hour. The very air around him seemed to swirl into a vast wind tunnel, propelling him away. Yet through the flow that was spinning him off his very axis, he heard the words as clear as day:

"She's worth it, Sheldon. She's worth everything. Appreciate her, before it's too late."

Sheldon awoke with a start, looking around his dark room in a panic. He was home. He was safe. He was in his own bed, and a quick look down assured him he was in his warm pajamas. Not half naked and frozen.

Home.

But he felt no less secure.

_"…__She's worth it, Sheldon. She's worth everything. Appreciate her, before it's too late."_

Sheldon's heart was beating out of his chest, sweat pouring down his brow. As overheated as he felt, a chill ran through his body and he clutched his blanket to him tightly. Breathing out of control, he leaned back against the pillows and tried to calm himself down. He wanted to close his eyes, but he was afraid the dream would return.

Sheldon's mind catapulted him back to that fateful night- Anything Can Happen Thursday- where the reasons for his distress originated. It only took one woman…one strange, ethically questionable woman, to upend his entire universe. She spoke words to him that laid his soul bare.

Stupid psychic. Stupid vision. Stupid, stupid, stupid…he didn't believe her words at the time, couldn't even bear to be in the same room with her and Penny. He fled, walking home as quickly as his long legs would carry him. He vaguely registered that Penny would have to walk home alone, but so be it. It was her fault for dragging him there, anyway.

How in the world did her malarkey reach Professor Proton? How could he believe that hacks words? Sheldon thought he could always trust his mentor to tell him the truth. That he could be in cahoots with that charlatan…

Finally giving in and closing his eyes, he tried to gather his wits about him. He tried to will away the fear that had crept into his mind, into his heart. He tried to shut out the doubt that was threatening to extinguish him.

He tried, and he failed.

For the first time in months since he boarded that train headed to nowhere, Sheldon Cooper allowed himself to feel.

All of the frustration, all of the loneliness. It came rushing out of him in a torrent of emotions so great that he was forced to let out a loud sob.

Unable to hide from the reality anymore, Sheldon rolled over and buried his face in his pillow to stifle his cries. They seemed to go on forever, the pain of his folly threatening to smother him.

Now that you know the truth…

The truth- the truth is…

You love her.

The words hit him like a ton of bricks.

Love.

Of _course_ he loved her. He'd told her so, the night of Prom. He didn't know where the words came from, but they tumbled out of his mouth as easily as anything he'd ever said. He felt it. He knew it.

But lately, there was an invisible force pushing its way between them, and he had no idea what it was. Amy had been aloof and quiet. She was normally upbeat and bubbly, and could hold her own in any conversation. The past few weeks, though, Sheldon had noticed a shift in her demeanor. And it frightened him. She was still sweet Amy, attentive Amy, remarkable Amy…yet something was off. And as clueless as he was to social cues and facial expressions, he was at a loss as to how to approach her about it.

Had he done something, said something, to upset her? He couldn't think of any instance lately that would have resulted in this shift, unless…

Sheldon felt a wave of nausea overwhelm him as he hesitantly considered something he hadn't before.

Had Amy grown tired of him? Was she questioning her love for him? Was she considering…breaking up with him?

While it was true that Amy said she would wait for him, however long it took, the facts remained: she was young, healthy, and beautiful. There were aspects of their relationship lacking, and he worried it was just a matter of time before she gave up on him.

Jumping out of his bed, he threw on his robe and headed to the living room. He was fully awake now, and the nagging in his gut had turned into panic. Pacing the room wildly, he tried to steady his breathing and calm his racing heartbeat. What was that Professor Proton had said? The key he sought lies with her.

Yes, he knew it did. He suspected as much, and not just recently. Yet he was still hesitant to open up that part of himself he kept hidden, even to Amy, for fear that once she knew his deepest and darkest secrets, she would no longer place him on that pedestal he'd grown accustomed to.

Where this fear and anxiety was coming from, he had no idea. But he knew without a doubt, there was something awakening in him that was way out of his comfort zone.

Since their train kiss last Valentine's Day, the gates were open. He had no hesitancy kissing her anymore; he even craved it. Just thinking of her warm, soft lips that usually tasted like candy or chocolate…well, it made him _extremely_ happy. The problem was, he was beginning to crave…other…things. For instance, what her body would feel like if it were to lay beside him in the dark. What her skin would feel like, if his body covered hers. Would it remain smooth and soft, or pebble with goose bumps? That line of thinking only made his mind wander down other avenues; darker avenues. Like what the tips of her breasts would feel like, if he ran his thumbs across them. Or what her hands upon his flesh would render, if he gave in and allowed her to give him what they both wanted.

Running a trembling hand through his hair, Sheldon moaned quietly. More and more these erotic images were haunting him. Was he truly going insane? Or was this what…sexual frustration was like? This blinding need to touch Amy. Smell Amy. Listen to Amy. Kiss Amy. Make love to Amy…

Dear Lord, he thought frantically. The descent into madness had begun.

Sheldon stared at the wall, the darkness obscuring his vision. It was conceivable that he was, in fact, losing his mind. What were all of these disturbing dreams about, anyway? Would they never end?

He tried to trace it back to one thing, but was coming up short.

For weeks, Sheldon had been having difficulty finishing his research. He bounced back and forth between String Theory, Dark Matter, String Theory, Dark Matter…it was becoming unbearable. He had never experienced these feelings of frustration before, and it scared him. His 34th birthday had just passed, and he was no closer to that Nobel than when he was 30. Or 25. Or 20…

Why couldn't he focus? Why was the Universe making it so hard for him to concentrate on those things which he was born to do? Trained for? They used to come so naturally to him. Now, he felt unanchored and adrift.

And then of course…there was Amy.

Always Amy.

He thought back to months prior, when he finally saw her again after weeks apart. He was torn between utter shock and utter joy upon seeing her with Leonard at the Police Station. The hurt he'd inflicted on her was still visible in her verdant eyes, though. It physically pained him to see it. He had foolishly thought Amy would get over his callous words and biting tone from their last meeting. At least, he had wished she had. Amy knew how he was, and he had taken comfort all of these years in the fact she was patient and understanding of his issues. It was clear to Sheldon now, he had made a monumental mistake.

Amy was different since his arrival home.

Not in an overt way, but…different nevertheless.

While still cordial and kind, Sheldon noticed with growing unease that she didn't go out of her way to ingratiate herself to him. The times they were together, such as dinner at Los Robles with the group, or the times he came to visit her at work, surprising her with lunch, she seemed distant. Any time physical contact was initiated, by Sheldon no less, Amy jumped a mile. He could only stare at her helplessly as she tried to recover.

He had admitted to her in the car on the way home that he felt like a failure, and he was afraid she thought less of him now because of it. As usual, Amy put his mind at ease with her sweet words and reassurances that it didn't matter to her if he wasn't perfect. He strived to keep that in mind, yet he could feel the change in her demeanor.

A feeling deep inside of him told him something was very wrong. He tried to push it away, but as the weeks flew by, he knew he could no longer bury his head in the sand. The fact that he had hurt Amy deeply tore at him, nagged at him…he was losing sleep over it, and now Professor Proton had come back.

It was too late to try to fall back asleep, and to early too get up and prepare for the day. Sheldon was caught in that strange place called limbo. He hated limbo. Detested it. In his beautiful mind, you were either in one place or the other. Never stuck between the two.

Perhaps some hot cocoa would help; it was February and so a month that had an 'r' in it was suitable for the drink.

The city of Pasadena was still sleeping peacefully, the soft pink light of dawn still a good hour away. Sheldon glanced out of his window, envious of those fortunate enough to still be enjoying slumber.

After pouring milk in a saucepan and some chocolate into his favorite mug, Sheldon stood at the stove, staring into space. A ping on his phone alerted him to a Facebook update. He retrieved it from his desk, surprised to see it was from Amy. Forgetting his cocoa, he sat down at his laptop and logged in, pulling up her Facebook page.

He stared at her most recent avatar. Having been 'off the grid' for a while, he hadn't noticed that she'd even changed it. The picture was something he recognized immediately, although Amy putting it as her profile picture was strange. It was The I-Ching symbol for chaos. Sheldon's eyes followed her information down the page until he saw her personal information.

In a relationship with Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

He didn't know why, but he let out a huge breath of relief. His eyes drifted further down to her recent post.

_'__Can't sleep. Insomnia is the worst.' _

Sheldon stared at the post, stunned. She was awake. It wasn't like Amy to get on Facebook in the middle of the night. Odder still, was her posting something so personal. His heart in his throat, he shifted his cursor into the comment box, staring at the blinking line for a few seconds. Could he do it? Before he even had the chance to consider his actions, he typed her a response.

_'__It certainly is. Try some cocoa. I am a firm believer in the power of a hot beverage. But you already know this.'_

Hitting enter before he could stop himself, he sat back and held his breath for what seemed an eternity. A notification came immediately, in the form of a private message.

_'__Sheldon? Why are you awake? Are you alright?'_

Sheldon sighed, thinking back to his dream. He couldn't very well tell her about that. He decided to avoid her question and turn it back on her.

_'__The question is, are 'you' alright, Dr. Fowler? Why are you awake?'_

The chat box was blank for a few moments, and Sheldon worried he upset Amy for prying. He waited for an answer, his eyes glued to the screen. When the one word explanation came back, he frowned.

_'__Nightmare.'_

Sheldon's eyes widened, his heart beginning to thump.

He knew Amy had a problem with night terrors. He had never experienced one with her before, as they had never…spent the night together. Yet Bernadette and Penny had on occasion mentioned it wasn't a pretty sight. Worry began to flourish in his chest, and he didn't even think twice before picking up his cell phone and dialing her number. It rang three times before Amy answered tentatively.

"Hello?"

Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief, just happy to hear her voice.

"Amy," he said breathlessly, putting a hand upon his heart. "Are you alright? Do you need me to come over to your apartment?" He rushed out, and Amy felt warmth spread through her body at his obvious concern.

"I'm alright now, Sheldon. Thank you. You don't have to come over. It's almost time to get ready for work, anyway."

Sheldon felt something was off in her tone; she sounded so far away, as though the line was muffled. He sat back down in his desk chair, frowning at not being able to articulate what it was he wanted to say.

"Amy…are you sure you're alright? It's not like you to be up in the middle of the night. And trolling Facebook, for that matter."

A harsh sigh found its way out of her mouth, and Sheldon sat up straighter as his impeccable hearing caught it.

"Amy?" He asked in alarm, not knowing what to do. The seconds stretched on and Sheldon was growing more and more agitated. Finally, Amy cleared her throat.

"I'm fine, Sheldon. Really. Just a bad dream. It's very early for you to be up. What woke you?" She asked, changing the subject. Sheldon took a deep breath.

"Bad dream as well," he said sheepishly, not knowing what else to say.

"Hmmm…" Amy murmured absently, unwilling or unable to elaborate.

"Amy…are we still meeting for date night tomorrow?"

Amy was quiet for a beat.

"Of course, Sheldon. Why wouldn't we? Unless of course, you've something else to do?"

Sheldon frowned at her question. Something else to do? What did she mean by that?

"Amy…of course I have nothing else to do. It's our date night. I have barely seen you all week. I've…missed your company."

There, he said it. He didn't know if it would prove to be a mistake, but it was the truth.

On the other end of the line Amy sat with wide eyes, not knowing how to respond. The seconds dragged on, and Sheldon was becoming worried.

"Amy?" He asked tentatively, fearing the worst.

"Yes, Sheldon…I'm here. I have missed you…as well. I'll see you at seven." She promised.

"Thank you, Amy. I suppose I should let you go now. You are okay, yes?"

"Yes, I'm okay. Thank you for calling me, Sheldon. It was nice to hear your voice."

Sheldon had no idea how to respond to that. He had a sinking feeling he was the reason for her distress. But Leonard had told him not everything was about him. Perhaps Amy couldn't sleep like she had stated, and nothing more.

Or maybe, it _was_ because of him. Maybe he had done irreparable damage to her. To them. And she was losing sleep over how to tell him she no longer wanted him in her life. Panic began to swirl in Sheldon's stomach, and he caught his breath.

"Sheldon?" She questioned, and he coughed loudly.

"Yes. I…you're welcome, Amy. I hope you have a good day today," he choked out sincerely.

"Thank you, Sheldon. You as well. I will speak to you later this afternoon. Goodbye."

The line went dead and Sheldon sat there for at least a minute, holding the phone to his ear.

She was gone.

She was gone.

She was gone.

Don't be silly, he reasoned. She wasn't really gone.

Sheldon closed his eyes tightly, shaking his head back and forth in an effort to clear the phantom voices that would not cease.

_You love her. She knows you love her. And she loves you. _

But was that enough?

He had to get a handle on this. He must. He would. If he only knew how.


	2. Chapter 2

~Chapter 2~

A/N - Thank you all for the warm welcome and wonderful reviews of Chapter 1 of my story. I am Shamy all the way, so never fear. This Chapter will delve into the mind and heart of our favorite Neurobiologist. Slight spoilers ahead::::::: If you haven't been spoiled with the taping report for 8x16, you may want to hold off reading this.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This story is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Even as I know, to trust and let it go…I still fight it. Fight it…And now I am alone. I feel it in my bones…I have no defense against this love…" KT Tunstall - Miracle

Running. Gasping. Gulping. Stumbling. Screaming. Pounding. Begging. Crying. Crying. Crying.

_NO!_

Amy woke up with a start, yelling Sheldon's name out into the darkness. She nervously clutched her chest in panic, trying to calm her mind and ease her heart rate. Slowly the room's darkness mellowed into soft light, aided by the streetlamp outside. Her breathing sounded high pitched and lungs ached. Had she been running in her dream? Yes, she was. Frantically running. Searching. The effects of her exercise had been so real. Her limbs almost hurt.

_'Wake up. Wake up!'_ She demanded, forcing her mind to clear.

It was the same nightmare she had endured for months. But this time, it was much worse. This time, Sheldon was truly gone. She couldn't find him anywhere. She went to his apartment and found it cleaned out. Penny's apartment, cleaned out. She called each of her friends in turn. Everyone's phone was disconnected. She wandered the city, going to places they frequented. Nothing.

She was utterly and entirely alone. Her deepest fear. Her worst nightmare, come to pass. Howard and Bernadette, gone. Raj and Emily, gone. Leonard. Penny. Sheldon…

Flinging her covers off of her damp body, she hopped off the bed and began to pace her bedroom trying to burn off the adrenaline coursing through her blood. This was insane. Sheldon was safe and sound at home. He was not leaving her again. They were fine….more than fine.

Right?

Amy stopped pacing, running a shaky hand through her hair. This was ridiculous, she thought wildly. I am a Neuroscientist. I before anyone know the meaning and origin of these dreams. Brought on by stress, they will subside eventually. They mean nothing. I should just go back to bed and sleep this off.

But she couldn't.

The Scientist in her knew she was lying to herself; fooling herself. There were some heavy seeded fears rattling around in her brilliant brain, the most of which was that Sheldon was going to decide to leave her again. And for good this time. A feeling of helplessness began to rise in her at that thought, and she stumbled back towards the bed.

She hated feeling like she was walking on tenterhooks with him. She didn't know what possessed her to kick him out of her apartment a few weeks ago, when he was insistent on carrying through with that infernal anxiety test. That could have surely resulted in him hopping on the next train out of town. Yet in that moment, she didn't care. Sheldon had to learn that he could not always treat her like an assistant. They were in a relationship, which meant equality. If he couldn't respect her enough to listen to her concerns, about his wellbeing, no less…than he would have to suffer the consequences. He could be so damn selfish when he wanted to be.

At times, she wondered if she had dreamt the whole Prom night scenario. It was hard enough, trying to pluck up the courage to admit to Sheldon, with words, that she loved him. But the fact he beat her to the punch left her heart in tatters. It was her deepest desire, her fondest wish…to be loved by Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper. To have him voice it, and not because he was forced to. But like every good thing that had ever happened to Amy, it didn't come without a cost. The hefty sum? Now she had even more reason to fear losing Sheldon. He finally admitted his love for her. Now that she knew, she could never go back.

But how could she go forward, with this…_thing_…constantly rearing its ugly head?

Something _was_ bothering her; an itch she couldn't quite scratch, taking up residence in her brain.

She couldn't admit it to anyone, but that experiment she proposed a few weeks ago on intimacy acceleration had really shaken her. She didn't know what propelled her to propose such a thing, especially pitting Sheldon and Penny together. Deep down, in a place she tried to hide, she secretly feared that Sheldon and her bestie would realize their hidden love for one another. And it would be her fault. What was she thinking?

She tried to act like it was for Science. But in reality, she was desperate to know the truth. She was at a place now, emotionally, where she couldn't afford to dwell in darkness. Her unconscious mind forced her to do what her heart couldn't.

The experiment ended, and all was well. No love match, as expected. Yet for a split second, her worst fears took a hold of her. And she was ashamed to admit there was still a lingering doubt as to why Sheldon was so flippant about the whole thing. Had he really thought there might be a chance he and Penny could fall in love? Probably not. Sheldon was anything if not thorough. But didn't he have even the slightest worry that such an outcome might exist?

She had always secretly envied Penny and Sheldon's easy comradery. Leonard had told her that they'd been friends a long time, and Penny knew how to deal with Sheldon. Amy understood that, and was even happy Sheldon had Penny. But the vulnerable woman in love inside of her couldn't shake the feeling of jealousy whenever Sheldon turned to Penny instead of her. They shared a bond Amy feared she could never replicate with him. It wasn't the first time a beautiful woman had something she wanted. But it was the first time ever that the beautiful woman was her best friend. And the object of desire was her boyfriend's trust.

Amy shook her head, angry with herself for feeling these feelings. She was no wallflower, no victim. She knew that while such a scenario _could_ happen, it wouldn't. Penny loved Leonard. And Sheldon loved Amy. So where were these insecure feelings coming from?

Perhaps, it stemmed from the fact Sheldon left for 45 days, without so much as a goodbye, and very sporadic contact while gone. And then, to add insult to injury, Sheldon let it be known to her that her showing up with Leonard at the Police Station was not his first option. Or second. Or maybe even third. And that fact stung her more than she wanted to admit.

Amy wondered if he would have had the same reaction to seeing Penny. Or the others. Why was she so different? Why did he act annoyed, unsettled even, upon seeing her walk in with his best friend? They hadn't seen each other in almost two months. Logic dictated he would want to see her, didn't it? And yet, she could see his face falling as their eyes locked. Hear the worry in his tone when he asked Leonard _'Why did you bring Amy?'_

Amy sighed as she pushed her hair back from her face, her breathing beginning to slow. She couldn't change her feelings; no, she was hopelessly in love with the man. And there was nothing she could do about that now. But what she could control, was how she allowed Sheldon to treat her. If he wanted to keep her at arm's length, then perhaps she should agree to that. At least until he knew what he truly wanted. They were in a good place now, but she still worried that he would one day say he couldn't do this anymore.

She had to admit, the prospect of retreating from Sheldon felt like a knife to her midsection. She didn't want to go in reverse with her boyfriend. She wanted to move forward. But Amy was tired of being hurt all of the time. And she was tired of watching their friends pitying glances aimed her way. They all wondered why she put up with him and his treatment. She could hardly answer those questions herself. The only thing she knew with a level of certainty, was that her love for him was worth it. _He_ was worth it. She knew she was the stronger of the two, but lately it was getting harder to keep the faith.

Ever since Prom, she felt as though they were stuck in this groove of _'where do we go from here'_? It pained her to wonder if Sheldon was so indecisive about his future with her. All of her cards were on the table. She'd bore her soul to him, and all she could do was wait until he was ready. The trouble was…would he ever be?

On top of everything else, Amy didn't feel at all well. She left work yesterday with a terrible headache, and now her throat was sore. The last thing she needed was a cold, she thought in annoyance.

Amy glanced at the clock. It read just past four am. Maybe she could get some work done on her computer, she thought. It looked like she wouldn't be getting back to sleep. Making her way out to the living room, she looked around her dark, lonely apartment. Would she always live here, alone? Would this little two room space define her?

_'You're being an idiot,'_ she chided herself bitterly. Resolved to stop this pity party, she sat down at her computer and logged in. After half an hour of some paperwork, her eye caught the bold F icon on her favorites bar.

'_What the hell,_' she thought, clicking on it and scrolling through the mundane posts of her friends and associates. Everyone out there was living their lives, partying, having babies, getting drunk. Amy sighed, rolling her eyes. It wasn't anything she wasn't doing, after all. Well, not the having babies part, anyway. Clicking onto her page, she stared at the notifications.

_Howard Wolowitz invited you to like his page, Neil Diamond Rules_

_Penny tagged you in a post_

_Friend request from Bert_

Pinching up her nose at that last one, Amy shook her head. Her eyes caught sight of her most recent avatar, and she cocked her head to the side.

In the month that Sheldon was gone, Amy took solace in the fact that no matter what happened with their relationship, she would endure. She had to. She couldn't allow his absence to shake her. She worked long and hard to become the noted Scientist she was, and she had to remain strong, for herself. It took everything in her not to break down in tears every time she saw Sheldon's face in a picture, heard his voice on the phone, or read an email or text from him.

Never one for religion, she turned to philosophy for comfort. Funny enough, she came across the I Ching online one day and as her eyes devoured the theory for Chaos, she felt lighter somehow. Opening another window, she pulled up the words that had brought her so much courage.

_Before a great vision can become reality there may be difficulty. Before a person begins a great endeavor, they may encounter chaos. As a new plant breaks the ground with great difficulty, foreshadowing the huge tree, so must we sometimes push against difficulty in bringing forth our dreams. "Out of Chaos, Brilliant Stars are Born."_

Amy smiled sadly. Yes, out of Chaos….No one would argue with her that forging a life with Dr. Sheldon Cooper was not fraught with difficulties. She oftentimes felt like she was dragging him through that soil, pushing and fighting against her to reach the sunlight. She saw the amazing potential in both him and their future together. If only he would stop running, stop choosing to dwell in darkness under the Earth.

She thought of her sweet Baboo. He hated chaos. It scared him to death. Most things did, but disorder was at the top of his list. She often pondered what _he_ would have done, if _she_ had been the one to get on a train and leave for 45 days. Would his carefully constructed life been thrust into a tailspin? Or would he have endured? For the most part, she knew she had become as necessary to Sheldon as air. So why did he still behave like he didn't need her? Was it pride? Fear? Or some darker emotion that she dared not entertain?

Indifference.

Damn…she was tired. So very tired. Why was she wasting time online when Sheldon was across town, snug in his bed like a baby?

Clicking back to Facebook, she glumly updated her status.

_'Can't sleep. Insomnia is the worst'_

Letting out a sarcastic grunt, Amy got up and went to prepare some tea. The earlier ache in her throat was turning into a burning sensation. Great, she thought, slamming her kettle on the stove after filling it with some water. Across the room, she heard her Facebook alert ping. Scrunching her brows, she made her way over slowly, shocked to see an alert from Sheldon.

_'It certainly is. Try some cocoa. I am a firm believer in the power of a hot beverage. But you already know this.'_

What the hell is he doing up?

Tea forgotten, Amy sat down and pulled up the pm box for Sheldon.

_'Sheldon, why are you awake? Are you alright?'_

She chewed her thumbnail as she waited for his reply, and it came immediately.

_'The question is, are 'you' alright, Dr. Fowler? Why are you awake?'_

Amy stared silently at his words. She decided to be honest, without going into too much detail.

_'Nightmare'._

Thirty seconds later, her cell phone was ringing from its dock by the desk. Amy flinched as the loud chime rang out, allowing it to ring three times before gingerly taking it and accepting the call.

"Hello?"

"Amy? Are you alright? Do you need me to come over to your apartment?"

The frantic tone of Sheldon's voice startled her. His concern was palpable, and she could imagine him clutching his chest as he did when he was agitated. Amy smiled fondly, despite her melancholy mood.

"I'm alright now, Sheldon. Thank you. You don't have to come over. It's almost time to get ready for work, anyway."

Even to her own ears, her voice was not convincing. How she wished he would hop in a cab and race to her apartment, bursting through the door and gathering her up in his arms tightly. In her mind, he would whisk her to her bed, laying her down with care, and kiss her everywhere.

_'Good grief…I'm turning into a blithering idiot.'_

"Amy…are you sure you're alright? It's not like you to be up in the middle of the night. And trolling Facebook for that matter."

Sheldon's tone, coupled with the fact he called her and was genuinely worried for her, made her throat close. Before she could stop it, a sob forced its way out. She bit her lip painfully as she heard Sheldon's breathe stutter.

"Amy?" he asked, the pain in his voice apparent. She hated worrying him. Hated making him feel uncomfortable. She wished more than anything, that he would afford her the same courtesy.

"I'm fine, Sheldon. Really. Just a bad dream. It's very early for you to be up. What woke you?" She asked curiously. She waited and waited, thinking the call dropped.

"Bad dream as well."

Amy's eyes widened at his admission. She wondered if he was being truthful. She knew he couldn't lie to save his life, but she wasn't there to see if his eye was twitching or his lips trembling.

"Hmmm…"

An uncomfortable silence enveloped the couple, and Amy hated it. Finally, Sheldon spoke, his soft voice sounding weary.

"Amy…are we still meeting for date night tomorrow?

"Of course, Sheldon. Why wouldn't we? Unless of course, you've something else to do?"

_Did that come out accusing or defensive? God, I hope not…_

"Amy…of course I have nothing else to do. It's our date night. I have barely seen you all week. I've…missed your company."

His gentle voice was like a balm to her heart. She closed her eyes, allowing his words to sink in. He missed her company. He missed _her_.

"Amy?"

She broke herself out of her stupor.

"Yes, Sheldon…I'm here. I've missed you…as well. I'll see you at seven.

She could have sworn she heard him sigh in relief.

"Thank you, Amy. I suppose I should let you go now. You are okay, yes?"

She shook her head_._

_No_

"Yes, I'm okay. Thank you for calling me, Sheldon. It was nice to hear your voice."

_It would be even nicer to feel your touch. Taste your kiss. Have you in my bed._

He hadn't answered her, and she feared he hung up.

"Sheldon?"

He coughed loudly on the other end of the line.

"Yes…I…you're welcome, Amy. I hope you have a good day today."

"Thank you, Sheldon. You as well. I will speak to you later this afternoon. Goodbye."

Amy disconnected, setting her phone back on its dock. She stared at the phone for a full minute, Sheldon's voice still fresh in her ears.

"Sheldon, Sheldon…wherefore art thou, Sheldon?" She whispered, feeling like a fool. A fool with a PhD and an IQ of 185, but a fool, nevertheless. She _had_ to stop this. This wasn't something she walked into blindly, this relationship with Sheldon Cooper. She knew of his faults, she knew of his eccentricities. She knew he had OCD, a god complex, and a low capacity for emotional ties. She _knew_ this. And she accepted it, long ago. But she couldn't help that she ached for him, body and soul. She was tired of going to sleep alone, waking up alone, walking through the day knowing her man was across campus, yet so out of her reach.

It wasn't that she wanted him to change into something he wasn't. It was that she wanted him to put her first, as she did for him. Was that really so hard? Perhaps it was. Maybe, this was all she could ever hope to expect from him: a once weekly date night, a few takeout dinners here and there, and separate apartments. Would that be enough? Could it be?

Amy was startled out of her somber thoughts by her alarm clock ringing by her bedside. She sighed, turned off her computer, and rose to face the day.


	3. Chapter 3

~Chapter 3~

A/N - Thank you to everyone who has read, reviewed, and put this on alert. It means the world to me. I'm new to this game, so any and all feedback is appreciated. Many have brought up how you want Sheldon to beg and grovel for Amy's forgiveness. Don't worry…he'll be doing a lot of that. I would be remiss if I didn't thank the lovely and amazing Hazelra7 for her support and friendship. Her stories rock this fandom.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…So little time…try to understand that I'm… Trying to make a move just to stay in the game… I try to stay awake and remember my name… But everybody's changing and I don't feel the same…." Keane – Everybody's Changing

Sheldon was tired. The day dragged on, each moment feeling like ten. Checking his watch, he was happy to note he would see Amy in three hours. All day, he had been unable to concentrate on anything. His disturbing dream and Amy's sad voice co-mingled inside of his head, leaving him troubled.

His whiteboard was full of equations, yet all of them were only half solved. It was scary how much his work paralleled his life. Only seeing one half of the whole, without any concrete conclusions. And in his work, as his life, he feared the roadblocks in his path were put there by his own doing. He ran his hands across his tired eyes, knowing full well he could offer Physics nothing more of import today.

_He should give himself to this relationship..._

"Enough!" He said aloud, exasperated at the constant influx of memories of that psychic. This would simply not do. How was he supposed to get anything done, when feelings and emotions and memories were washing over him like a waterfall? And why now? After he'd seemingly accepted his fate; that he was in fact doomed to be pair bonded, and after returning from his trip of self – discovery their relationship was stronger than ever?

_You know why…you left her. And you never, ever apologized for it. You slammed the door in her face, after mocking her innocent suggestion of living together, and screaming at her that it was never going to happen. The guilt is eating away at you, isn't it Dr. Cooper?_

Good Lord…yes. It was. He never meant to hurt Amy. He knew she meant well, but the fates were converging to rain down upon him a maelstrom of changes that he wasn't prepared for. Even now, months later, the pain in her eyes as he unleashed his anger on her haunted him.

Sheldon sat down wearily at his desk, pulling out the postcard he had hidden inside his desk drawer.

While rummaging around earlier for some papers he had to courier off, he spied the postcard, which he threw in there the Monday after their trip last Valentine's weekend. He at first thought to discard it, but something wouldn't let him. It was a tangible reminder of a huge turning point in his life. He couldn't keep it lying around the apartment, either, for fear Leonard or worse, Penny…would see and tease him for keeping it.

'Napa Valley welcomes you'. – The glossy card depicted a scene of the Truchard Vineyard; rows upon rows of grapevines, hills, and the fertile valley below. The postcard picture was taken from a third story window of the bed and breakfast they stayed at. The postcards were free to all guests, part of their welcome package which included a small bottle of wine, chocolates, matches, a miniature corkscrew, and a pen. Sheldon had to admit, it was a beautiful place.

He was hesitant at first to reside there, but as the weekend went on, he found he enjoyed himself immensely. While it was certainly odd not to have full Wi-Fi, and no X Box or laptop, he found the peace and quiet of the place endearing. The air felt crisper and smelled cleaner than in Pasadena, and he felt himself relaxing despite himself. His new friend the train conductor who stopped by to play his banjo only added to his enjoyment.

Howard, Bernadette, Amy and himself toured the vineyard, Amy and Bernadette getting tipsy over the wine samples. He and Howard followed behind them, making small talk about work and the rest of the gang. Howard was surprisingly interesting lately, a fact Sheldon had previously thought would never happen. Sheldon marveled that even though Howard was still, well…Howard- marrying Bernadette wasn't the stupidest thing he'd ever done. Marriage had honestly changed Howard for the better. He never thought he'd see the day when the self- proclaimed sex god would settle down, and make someone else happier than himself. A strange feeling of respect bubbled inside of Sheldon at the thought. The romantic setting didn't helping matters, either.

Everywhere he looked, there seemed to be an element of romance. From the roses which lined the bed and breakfasts driveway, to the gazebo adjoining the vineyard to the main house, the place screamed intimacy. Sheldon wondered why such trappings were necessary. If two people were truly 'in love', then it would matter not where they spent their time together. Still, he had to admit that it was a lovely place.

If you liked that sort of thing. Which he didn't.

Did he?

Amy had looked like a teenager discovering a new land there; walking between the grapevines and stealing grapes, popping them in her mouth. He watched her surreptitiously all day, a strange feeling tugging at his heart. This playful side to her was one he'd never seen before. Perhaps it had been there all along, and he chose _not_ to see it.

He secretly feared that if he himself let his hair down, he would lose IQ points. That argument was baseless, he realized. He had fun with the guys all of the time, doing seemingly ridiculous things: paintball, halo, D&amp;D, Comic Con…none of those things rendered him stupid. So why would enjoying a nice weekend in the country with his girlfriend change him for the worse?

He was loathe to admit to it, but every time he saw Amy laugh or smile, his heart felt a fullness he never felt before. It wasn't like he had never witnessed her doing these acts before; Amy was quite the social butterfly once she 'let loose', as Penny said. Yet hearing the gentle laughter in her voice, or watching her face light up for some small reason, touched Sheldon, and touched him deeply. He found himself trying to make her laugh, or smile.

And promptly spent the next hours after contemplating what the hell was happening to him.

He remembered their last night there, Saturday, as they retired for the evening after a grand dinner in the dining room. It was the first time he had eaten Chateaubriand. He was no stranger to beef, being from Texas, but this was amazing. Amy had opted for chicken and he shocked her by asking her for a taste. She held out a forkful for him tentatively, amazed when he accepted it, his eyes meeting hers over the fork. The small group shared laughter and the B&amp;B owners made everyone feel comfortable. He actually felt sorry when the dinner ended.

Walking along the second floor corridor which was very narrow, they were so close that they were touching. The old building had no elevator, and walking up the stairs together reminded him of his apartment building. It seemed they were always ascending something together. An irony not lost on him.

When they arrived at her room he stood there, towering over her. He was unsure of what to do. Kiss her again? Make small talk? Luckily, Amy yawned, alerting him to the fact she was tired and the night was coming to a close. The all-day wine sampling made her happily toasted, and she put her hand on his cheek impulsively. Sheldon just stood there, gazing down at her numbly.

"Amy, are you drunk?" He asked dubiously. His suspicions were further enhanced by the way she slid said hand down to his chin, cupping it tenderly. Sober Amy would never attempt such a bold move. Sheldon swallowed noisily.

"Oh, no. I'm not as think as you drunk I am," she chortled.

He gazed at her with a mixture of disdain and amusement. It seemed the alcohol was doing its worst. He couldn't fault her, though…he hated remembering that when he was tipsy, he did things like remove his pants in public. Better not clue her in of that little tidbit.

Amy burst into laughter, her knees giving way and falling into his chest clumsily. Forgetting his aversion to touching, Sheldon braced her back, subsequently sliding her closer to his chest. She continued laughing, losing her breath. All the while Sheldon began to tremble.

It was so easy with Amy, and so difficult, at the same time. Maybe that was the problem. He wanted it too much. The normalcy, the feeling he wanted to succumb to. On the other hand, he was nowhere near ready to give in to…whatever this was. He simultaneously wanted to shove her away and go hide under his bed and drag her inside to hers. These warring thoughts left him exhausted.

"Oh, Cuddles. I'm not drunk, really, just giddy. I'm sorry. I guess I had a glass too much. But I'll be right as rain in the morning. I promise," she winked, and Sheldon's stomach somersaulted. Flirty Amy was dangerous Amy. He was scared to death at how tightly he was wrapped around her finger already. It was best not to argue with her. Even in this state, she could hogtie him in less than seven seconds. His mind wandered back to another drunken night, the night they danced, the night she kissed him on her couch. So much had happened since then. For one thing, she wasn't his girlfriend then.

"Alright, if you say so," he whispered, pushing open her door. She went to lie in the bed, but Sheldon sat her down on the settee instead.

"I do so say. Say so. Yes," she giggled, and despite his penchant for level minded behavior, he found himself smiling broadly at her antics. He reached down to remove her shoes and placed them gently beside the settee. When he looked up, he noticed Amy was watching him intently, the smile gone from her face. He cocked his brow to her in question.

"You look so damn handsome when you smile. You should smile more often, Dr. Cooper," she said huskily, the tenor of her voice sending a thrilling shiver down his spine. Sheldon was paralyzed, rooted to the spot as he watched her eyes slide down to his mouth, holding there.

"Your lips were made to smile. Especially this one," she murmured, taking her thumb and touching his full bottom lip tenderly. All rationale fled Sheldon's mind in that moment, and he closed his eyes. All that served to do was ignite the memory of last's night kiss on the train. The air in the room seemed to disappear, and Sheldon panicked. Jumping up hastily, he stumbled over to the bed and began to untuck the duvet.

"I'll turn the bed down for you. Why don't you go change?" He suggested, his voice cracking. He took longer in his task then necessary, but it couldn't be helped. When he turned back to Amy, she was already passed out. He stared at her a moment, unsure if he should leave her there like that. The gentleman in him surged forward. He turned down the final sheet, returning to her quietly. She had on another cardigan, this one pink and fuzzy. The second he touched it, he marveled at how soft it was.

His eyes slid up to her face, and he lost his breath. Her eyes were gorgeous; long thick lashes spread out across her pale cheeks. He didn't think her eyes could become any more captivating then the already were. He was wrong. Sheldon removed the cardigan, trying to make her comfortable.

The dress she wore was pink. It had little pink roses on it. He wondered if what lay beneath was also pink. He wondered if Amy would allow him to peek and find out. He wondered what else Amy would allow him to do, if he attempted.

_Einstein's ghost, I need to get a grip…_

Sheldon jumped away from her, pacing the small expanse between the settee and bed. He needed to calm down. Just calm down, Cooper. His eyes kept straying over to his sleeping beauty, amazed by how peaceful she looked. How could she be so, when inside he was falling apart?

Gathering his strength, he did what any good boyfriend would do. Placing one arm across her back and another under her knees, he lifted her up bridal style, and deposited her on the bed. Amy stirred a bit, but then turned and snuggled into the pillow. A serene smile lit her face, and he watched her, mesmerized. She looked like a fairy princess in her huge, pillowy bed. For the briefest moment, he considered lying down beside her and falling asleep.

That thought terrified him. So he quietly left and retreated to his adjoining room, thoughts of her plaguing his mind long into the night.

_What had that vixen done to him?_

Now, a year later, he was no less under her spell. He was even further enthralled, if that were possible.

The last few months were proof to him of how much they'd changed. How much _he'd_ changed. So many things were building up inside of him, and he felt weak and powerless to stop them.

His mind still clouded every time he remembered Amy baking him Meemaw's Christmas cookies. The emotional revelations of that day stunned him. She could have given him anything he had ever wanted, and it would have paled in comparison to what was in that tin. Looking in her eyes across that table, he knew.

_She is the key to your happiness…_

His dream last night had left him shaken. Where was all of this hippy dippy nonsense coming from, anyway? What was Arthur trying to tell him…be prepared. Be prepared for what? He had been trying so hard to change, to accommodate Amy into his life. He had succeeded beyond his expectations. But why did he have the terrible fear that it wasn't enough? That_ he_ wasn't ever going to be enough?

He had been running for years from his feelings. His feelings for Amy, his feelings over the deaths of his father, and his pop pop…he had learned early on that feelings weren't important to a Physicist. Emotional attachments did not help you discover elements or prove string theory. He could quite happily live without such entanglements. They served no function, other than to distract him from his work.

But now…

Now, there was a green eyed vixen who had turned his world upside down. Now, he questioned how he could have everything he wanted - A life with Amy, and the prestige and honor of winning a Nobel Prize.

_Personally and Professionally, all with fall into place, once he commits to her…._

A knock resounded on the door, startling Sheldon out of his thoughts. He hastily tucked the postcard back into his top drawer, slamming it shut.

"Yes, come in." He said briskly.

"Hey Sheldon. Got a minute?" Leonard asked, coming into the office and putting his messenger bag done on the chair near Sheldon's desk.

"Yes, Leonard. What is it?" He asked, still distracted by his previous thoughts. Leonard sat down, smiling at his best friend.

"You didn't come down to lunch today. The guys and I were worried about you. Everything okay?"

Sheldon busied himself with straightening up his already tidy desk.

"Yes. I wasn't very hungry earlier, so I had Alex bring me a sandwich."

Leonard nodded. "Alright, then. I just wanted to check and see if you and Amy wanted to join us tonight for dinner. Bernadette found this new Sushi place that looks promising and she, Howard, Penny and I are going."

Sheldon shook his head.

"No, thank you. It's date night, and Amy and I are trying a restaurant in Santa Monica, by the beach. I've researched it online and it seems appropriate," he said, leaving out the part that he was dying to be alone with her. While still happy to share her company over the week with the rest of their social circle, he longed for some one on one time with his girlfriend.

Leonard's curiosity was piqued.

"Okay. Wow…the beach? That's a fair drive for dinner. Getting all romantic there, aye Sheldon?" He teased, and Sheldon blushed. He had no idea how to respond to that comment.

"What does romance have to do with the beach, Leonard?"

Leonard smiled good naturedly at his friend.

"Sheldon, you know. The sand, the surf. The crashing waves. It's all very 'From Here to Eternity'."

Sheldon narrowed his brows, the pucker between them becoming more prominent. Leonard sighed and smacked his lips together. Sometimes, he wondered if Sheldon was a hopeless cause romantically.

"Well, you two have fun. Say hello to Amy for us."

Sheldon swallowed thickly.

"I will. Thank you."

Leonard picked up his bag to leave, when something stopped him. Turning, he met his friend's inquisitive stare.

"Sheldon, are you sure you're alright? I heard you puttering around the apartment early this morning and I was worried about you."

Sheldon tried to slip on his poker face. Biting his cheek, his gaze swung from Leonard's to the wall behind him.

"Yes, fine. I had a slight stomach ache, is all. No worries, good buddy."

The unusually high pitch of his voice had Leonard suspicious.

"Are you sure? Because usually, when you are ill, you come knocking on my door."

_Curses_, Sheldon thought. Leonard knew him too well. He tried to act as nonchalant as he could, putting a hand on his hip and leaning into his desk. Leonard's trepidation only continued to grow as he watched Sheldon's uncharacteristic behavior.

"No, no…I realized how selfish it would be of me to awaken you in the middle of the night. I dealt with it myself."

At this, Leonard's mouth dropped open.

"Um…since when?" He questioned, and Sheldon snorted haughtily.

"What is with the third degree? You should be happy I left you in peace. I don't need you for every little ailment, you know. I'm a grown man, Leonard. I don't feel the need to bore you with my bowel habits."

_Wait…What? Was he joking? There was a chart on the refrigerator for six years documenting just that. _

Truly worried now, Leonard took a step closer to Sheldon. Sheldon in turn took a step backward. The move caught Leonard's attention, and he frowned.

"Sheldon, you know you can come to me for anything, right? I know I razz you about how clingy you are, but you _are_ my best friend. I care about you, and I know all of these changes lately are an adjustment. If something is wrong you can tell me."

The sincerity in Leonard's voice touched Sheldon. For a moment, he considered telling him of his troubles. But then he remembered who Leonard's fiancé was. And what a big mouth she tended to have. And who her best friend was. Sadly, that halted that train of thought right then and there.

"I know, Leonard. And thank you. Really, though…I just couldn't sleep. I'm sure I'll make up for it tonight."

He couldn't push him, he knew. It was obvious Sheldon was hiding something, but hopefully he would come to him if he needed him. Pacified for now, Leonard relented.

"Okay, buddy. See you later." And with that, he left Sheldon to his thoughts. Which once again, drifted to his girlfriend.

He couldn't wait to see Amy. After their talk this morning, he felt this desperate need to make sure she was alright. It drove him mad, this feeling of wanting something he previously thought was for lovesick fools. He was looking forward to seeing her lovely face, hear her beautiful voice. No one could rouse his intellect like Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler.

Although he would never admit it, he was intrigued about this excursion. It was out of his comfort zone, going to a new restaurant so far from home. But he decided that he wanted to try new things. Amy didn't mind driving to Santa Monica, so he would relax and enjoy the evening. Even if it meant the beach.

And put the fact completely out of his mind that it was, in fact, _romantic_.


	4. Chapter 4

~Chapter 4~

A/N – Thank you all for your continued interest in my story. I do my best to answer all reviews, because your feedback is important and appreciated. I am humbled and honored by everyone's kind words.

Spoilers ::::::::: for 8x16 ahead. You may not want to read this until after the episode airs. For those who don't mind being spoiled or did read taping report….You're thinking it, I'm thinking it. Let's clear the air, shall we?

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…And life has a funny way of helping you out when you think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face…" Alanis Morissette – Ironic

Amy sat at her desk, squeezing lemon juice onto a spoon and mixing in some honey. She had lectured all morning, which didn't help her aching throat. The late February chill in the air wasn't helping matters, either. She rarely fell ill, so it was vexing her that she felt so under the weather today.

Looking at the clock, she noticed it was almost 1:30. Perhaps leaving early and heading home for a hot shower and a nap would do the trick. Her nocturnal workout and subsequent awakening had left her feeling exhausted.

She was already caught up on her notes today, and the test monkeys were all put away and tagged. All but Ricky, who stubbornly refused to go back with the rest, opting to sit in the cage by Amy's desk. She wondered if the little guy sensed her distress. It amazed her how intuitive he was.

She felt worse as the hours went by, and couldn't put her finger on what was ailing her. A wave of dizziness had overwhelmed her earlier, causing her to grip the lectern tighter so she wouldn't fall down. She rushed through the lectures with as much finesse as she could, but she could tell her heart wasn't really in it. The grad students didn't seem to mind, though; she had a good rapport with them and was glad she didn't bore them to tears. A few people commented on her raspy voice, but Amy blew it off.

'_I'm fine'_, she insisted to them, muddling through the morning as best she could.

Around 12 pm, Sheldon had texted her per their usual daily habit. Her face broke out in a smile at seeing his name come up on her phone.

'_Good day, Dr. Fowler. I hope you have had a pleasant morning.'_

'_Good day, Dr. Cooper. Very pleasant, thank you'_

She lied. The morning was anything but pleasant. But she couldn't let him know that.

'_I wanted you to know I was looking forward to tonight. Proposal: Shall we leave earlier than our customary time, say 6 pm? This would allow us ample time to arrive at our destination.'_

Amy smiled at Sheldon's sense and sensibility.

'_That would be acceptable. It would also allow for us to watch the Sunset over the water.'_

Damn…why the hell did she have to say that? Now he was going to be analyzing her statement and criticizing-

Her phone pinged again, and Amy hesitantly looked.

'_Indeed.'_

Shocked, Amy let out the breath she was holding.

'Oh. Okay, then. I will pick you up at 6.'

'_Good day, Dr. Fowler.'_

'_Good day, Dr. Cooper.'_

It made her laugh how after all of these years, they still called each by their titles. She wasn't a fool; she knew calling Sheldon by his title had an effect on him. A very positive effect.

_Stop it, Fowler…_

Amy stood up to retrieve some files from a cabinet, when a sudden coughing fit began. She sat down immediately as the strain of clearing her throat made her even dizzier.

If Sheldon knew she was having throat issues, he would cancel their date immediately. Even though he did take care of her the last time she was sick, it didn't pay to tempt fate twice. Her boyfriend could be quite bombastic. Not that she would mind another repeat performance of Sheldon bathing her.

She snorted to herself, resuming her home remedy of honey and lemon. She repeated the ritual five times when a knock resounded on the door. Looking up, Amy saw Penny standing there, a goofy grin on her face.

"Word up, bestie," Penny said in her best urban drawl. Coming into the lab, she plopped her bag down on the side of Amy's desk. Spying the menagerie of cold remedies, Penny frowned.

"Oh, are you sick?" She asked, concern coloring her tone.

Amy shook her head in the negative.

"Not really. Sore throat, I guess. I'm just a tad hoarse. I was lecturing all morning which made it worse.

Penny pulled up a chair, careful not to disturb any of the beakers.

"Have you taken anything for it?"

Amy swept her hand along the desktop, pointing out the obvious. Penny nodded.

"I had a half day today so I came by to say hello to Leonard, but he's off campus running some tests. So how about you and I grabbing a late lunch in the cafeteria?" She offered hopefully.

Amy shook her head in the negative, smiling sadly. "I would love to, but I really don't want to see Sheldon right now. He might be down there getting a drink. If he even thinks I'm ill"-

Penny waved her hand, realizing it was Thursday. "Say no more, I understand. Believe me, I understand."

Amy shrugged, deciding to start cleaning up to go home. While she busied herself labeling beakers and putting away notebooks, Penny watched her friend. Something had been bothering her for the last few weeks, she was sure of it. Amy wasn't one to upset the apple cart, so Penny knew she would have to broach the subject. Deciding it was now or never, she came up behind Amy and placed her hand gently on Amy's arm.

"Ames…I'm glad I have you alone. It seems we haven't had a moment to talk for a while now."

Amy nodded, raising her brows curiously.

"Yes, you're right. Is there something you'd like to discuss?"

It was Penny's turn to nod. Amy watched in confusion as she sat down and scooted hair chair closer to hers.

"I should have come to you about this sooner, but things have been crazy lately. I wanted to make sure….You're not upset about that intimacy accelerations experiment, are you? You've been…well…remote lately. I hope you know, nothing happened between Sheldon and me. Nothing at all. And it's freaking me out that you may think something did."

Glancing up at Penny, Amy was surprised to see genuine concern etched on her features. She could have said no. She _should_ have said no. Nothing was wrong. Penny was mistaken. But something inside of her gave pause.

She thought back to what she told Leonard last year, of how Sheldon and Penny's bond made her envious. And something inside of her broke. It was time she was honest, and voiced her concerns.

"I'm not upset, per se Penny. Not at you, anyway. But I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little hurt at how quickly Sheldon signed on to the experiment. I know it was my idea, and I shouldn't be feeling this way. It's just…sometimes, I envy the closeness that you and Sheldon share. He willingly tells you things that he would never admit to me. You know things about him that it's taken me years to pry out of him, and begrudgingly at that. It just…drives home the fact I still don't know what Sheldon wants from me."

Penny shot Amy an incredulous stare.

"What he _wants _from you? Oh, Amy…I think we both know what Sheldon wants. He's just too stubborn and frightened to admit it. The way he freaked out over you in that prom dress was explanation enough."

Amy pondered her words with a heavy heart. "That doesn't make it any easier, Penny. I'm glad he is reaching that place where intimacy is easier. But I'm not just talking about sex here. I'm talking about trust. And lately…I fear Sheldon hasn't given his to me. Not completely."

Penny nodded in understanding. She suspected this was a concern of Amy's. Who could blame her, having Sheldon Cooper as a boyfriend? Amy was a Saint for having such patience. Although, she knew Amy had nothing to fear. It was obvious Sheldon was head over heels for her. Mind, soul, and body.

"Amy…you do know Sheldon and I _are_ not,_ have_ not, and _will_ not ever be more than friends. We're like brother and sister. Tell me you know that. Sheldon even admitted to me that sometimes he views me as a mother figure. There is no reason for you to be jealous of our relationship. I love Leonard. I want to build a life with Leonard. And Sheldon wants the same with you. Sheldon has become this pseudo child of Leonard's and mine. I think over the years, we have taken the place of his parents. Leonard is the nurturer, and I'm the kick ass mama who doesn't put up with his crap. There is nothing romantic in that mix. He confides in me because I am like his mother with street smarts. It doesn't mean he doesn't trust you."

Amy sat back in her chair heavily. Everything Penny said made sense. But that was cold comfort when her boyfriend kept secrets from her.

"Yes, Penny. I do know that. And don't get me wrong; I'm happy Sheldon has you as a sounding board. I'm glad that _I_ have you. Sheldon trusts you and your good heart. But maybe it's just what you said: Sheldon _confides_ in you. But he _hides_ from me. He acts resentful every time I try to pry some truth out of him. It shouldn't be that way with the woman you claim to love. It's been four years, Penny. He never even told me his birthday. I had to sneak a glance at his driver's license when I took him for his exam. It just…hurts."

Penny didn't know what to say. It wasn't like Amy didn't bring up some valid points. One look at her friends troubled face, and she knew what had been festering inside of Amy had been a long time coming. She suddenly felt extremely guilty for not spending more time with her over the summer during Sheldon's absence.

"Amy, I never want you to think you have to compete with me. For anything. Most importantly, Sheldon's trust and attention. Do you want to know what I believe? I believe you are Sheldon's moral compass. He is so afraid to let you down, so terrified to look bad in your eyes, that maybe he keeps things from you because he doesn't want to know you view him as a failure. All of his life, he was first in everything. In recent months, things have changed professionally for him. He knows now he is not the high and mighty superhero he thought he was. But the thing is…_you_ still are. You are brilliant, at the top of your field, and I think he's worried you are growing tired of him. In many ways, on paper, you have outgrown him. And that petrifies him. Trust me."

Amy's face fell as she wondered if that were truly the case.

"He said that?" Amy asked meekly, unable to picture Sheldon not feeling superior in everything. Penny pursed her lips.

"Well, not in those words. But he said once that he was a callous egomaniac and that you are too good for him. And when we met you, you were a different woman. You've changed, Amy. You've blossomed into someone he is completely enamored with. He doesn't know how to cope with that. Besides…he's said other things to drive home the fact that he wants his future to include you."

Penny's voice was sly, and Amy wondered if she really wanted to hear what Sheldon said.

"What _has_ he said?" She asked, her voice breaking.

Penny smiled, a sweet smile full of something promising. Amy's breath was suspended as she waited.

"Sheldon said that he was working on resolving his issues with intimacy. He's said how you've changed his life, for the better. Honestly… before prom, he gave me this whole speech about how if you wanted to engage in…normal…prom rituals, then he would happily oblige you. You have nothing to worry about. Trust me. Dr. Whackadoodle is just going through puberty finally. And he's having all sorts of urges that he doesn't know what to do with. It's only natural that he is embarrassed to share them with you. After all, you are the reason for those urges."

Amy listened intently, her heart racing. He really said that about prom? Is that why he had that panic attack? So he _did_ think about them together. Did those thoughts give him pleasure? Happiness? Did they keep him awake at night, as they did her?

Sometimes, Sheldon's aloofness made her question everything he felt for her. He walked through life tolerating most people at best. So the thought was always present in her mind-

Did he simply tolerate_ her_?

What would he do if she suddenly were no longer there?

She thought back to the first time they broke up; his mother had to come from Texas to console him. He had, as Mrs. Cooper stated to her over the phone, 'lost his mind over her'. So much has changed since that time. They were moving into this strange area where they were heading toward the inevitable. It terrified her as much as it did Sheldon. So why weren't they discussing this?

She met Penny's hopeful gaze, and smiled warmly.

"Well, then. I suppose that is something good. Penny…I know you and Sheldon would never do…that. It's just…as much as we take a step forward, something drags us two steps back. I just wish he would talk to me. Confide in me. I feel like I'm all alone out here; I've never loved anyone as much as I love Sheldon. I know on the outside, I put on this façade that I'm strong. And for the most part, I am. But sometimes…I just want to be told that everything is going to be alright. I want what any woman wants."

Penny smiled at her friend tenderly. She never realized how much she loved Amy, until this moment. While it was true, her brilliant friend had her quirks, she had turned out to be the best girlfriend Penny had ever had. It wasn't easy for Penny; all of her life, people only liked her because she was considered popular, and beautiful. To have someone like her for herself, faults and all…especially someone so intelligent…it brought a lump to her throat.

If only Amy knew that Penny herself was she and Sheldon's biggest cheerleader. That she pushed her crazy friend to open up to his girlfriend, and try to embrace a more proactive role in their relationship and treat Amy with more respect….

What warmed Penny's heart exponentially was how much Amy loved Sheldon. She was the best thing ever to come into his life. She was once certain no one could ever love Sheldon Cooper.

Penny threw her arm around Amy's shoulder, squeezing gently. It wasn't often that Penny showed physical affection to her, so the action took Amy off guard. Nevertheless, she smiled at Penny, biting her lip shyly.

"I know, Ames…I know. And you deserve that, Sweetie. You are so good to Sheldon. He is very lucky to have you. God, that man can be infuriating. I think you should be elected to Sainthood," She chuckled.

Amy startled at Penny's strange choice of words. One must have died to be elected a Saint. And have performed a miracle. She had done neither of those. Shaking her head, Amy laughed. She could always count on Penny for amusement. She wasn't intelligent in the academic sense, but she tried. Her golden heart and fun loving spirit more than made up for her scholastic knowledge. It was good enough for Amy.

"Well, I suppose. But that's unfair to Sheldon. In reality, if you dig down, Sheldon is very easy to love."

Penny snorted unladylike.

"_Waaaay_ down," she joked, punching Amy on the arm gently. "Like to China."

The two friends shared a laugh at their favorite Theoretical Physicist's expense.

"You know Amy, I think our Sheldon is growing up. And I have a feeling that he is realizing his feelings for you are stronger than he wants to admit. I've never seen him so rattled before. He doesn't know which way is up these days. And that is a very good thing, for both of you. Trust me. Men like Sheldon think they don't need love. But he will find out one day like the rest of us that love has found him. Even if it hits him like a tsunami. "

Amy smiled softly, hoping that it wouldn't take that big a disaster for Sheldon to understand how good they could be together.

They chatted a few minutes more, until Penny looked at her watch and figured she should let Amy finish up.

"We're going for Sushi tonight. I'd ask you guys to join us, but I know you probably want to be alone. What's on the agenda?"

Amy smiled, thinking of Sheldon's idea.

"Well, we are driving to Santa Monica. There's a restaurant there Sheldon is eager to try. We won't be back until late, since it's by the beach."

Penny snickered, her manicured brow raising comically.

"What? And not have him back in bed by 9:30 on a work night? Amy, you little Vixen. Shaking him out of his zone."

Amy blushed at the fact Penny knew Sheldon's pet name for her. But Penny wasn't finished with her teasing.

"The beach you say, huh? And Sheldon wanted to try it? Hmm…" Penny said saucily, winking at her friend. Amy snorted in humor.

"Hey…don't tease him about it if you see him. I couldn't believe he wanted to actually leave the Pasadena City Limits. There's a big world out there, and I'm just glad Sheldon wants to experiment."

This earned Amy a full on guffaw from her blond bestie.

"Oh, I'm sure he wants to _experiment_," she said hotly, laughing maniacally at the look on Amy's face. Softening, Penny shot her a gentle smile.

"Amy…remember what I said, alright? Rome wasn't built in a day. Have patience. All will be well."

Amy's eyes watered at her friend's sincerity. She felt like an idiot for being so worried. It helped to know that Penny was trying to assuage her fears.

"Thank you, Penny."

Amy watched her friend exit her lab, before focusing once again on cleaning up. Penny popped her head back in, staring at Amy in concern.

"Before I go…are you _sure_ you're feeling alright, Ames? You look a little tired. Would you like me to take you to the Dr. and get checked out?"

Amy frowned deeply.

"No, no….I'm fine, Penny. It's just a sore throat. Really."

Penny gazed at her friend, not entirely convinced, but not at liberty to force the issue either.

"Okay. Feel better. And have fun tonight. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."

Well that was a broad term, Amy thought humorously.

Was what Penny said true? Was Sheldon as confused, as anxious, as giddy about their blossoming relationship as she was?

She exhaled heavily, her eyes swinging over to Ricky in his cage. He stared at her intently, as though he heard and understood every word he had just heard.

"You're lucky you don't have these problems," she whispered, smiling softly as Ricky put both hands over his eyes as though stressed.

"Cheeky monkey."

Amy shook her head, deciding it was time to leave. She had to stop by the drugstore to get some zinc. The last thing she needed was a lecture by Sheldon about the importance of immunity. Swinging her purse over her head, she shut the lights off and locked up for the day. She felt lighter somehow, having made peace with Penny.

But Penny wasn't really the issue at all. She would have to give Sheldon the benefit of the doubt. She trusted him, and she knew he loved her. This insecure feeling of hers needed to be put to rest. Once and for all.

A/N – Next up: Date night.


	5. Chapter 5

~Chapter 5~

A/N- Thanks to everyone for every review, PM, follow, and view. It's a gift. I would like to especially thank my real life Bestie, Vampgirl79, for her love, support, and encouragement. She doesn't follow the Shamy fandom, so my putting her through six months of reading and critiquing my chapters about Sheldon and Amy is so very much appreciated. Maybe we can persuade her to join our 'Ship?

This is a long chapter. There was too much to touch upon here to have to break it up. I hope you don't mind. Slight spoilers ahead for 8x16.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…How come the only way to know how high you get me, is to see how far I fall? God only knows how much I'll love you if you let me, but I can't break through it all. It's a heartbreak…" John Mayer – Heartbreak Warfare

Amy picked up Sheldon from Los Robles at 6 pm sharp, a trait about her he adored. She was always punctual, his little lady. Seeing her in the flesh after last night's dream was like a shock to his system. He sashayed to her car, shooting her a small wave. Amy reciprocated, smiling widely.

He wasn't wearing his usual khaki pants and one of his superhero t shirts. Amy took a moment to admire him as he made his way from the entrance way to her parked car. He had dressed for dinner in navy blue trousers and a powder blue buttoned down shirt. The closer he drew to the car, the bluer his eyes appeared. By the time he opened her passenger side door, Amy had already let out an involuntary 'Hoo'.

"Good evening, Amy." He said warmly, his eyes roaming over her face. A tingle began in his chest, and he looked away shyly as he settled into the car.

"Hello, Sheldon. All ready for our adventure?" She asked him, an excited lilt in her voice.

Was he ready? Yes. Yes he was. But even as he looked around Amy's immaculate car, he couldn't help but do his pre road trip check.

"Yes. But are you certain you have enough gas in the car?"

Amy grinned, turning towards her window and rolling her eyes playfully.

"Yes, Sheldon. The tank is full."

Sheldon nodded thoughtfully.

"And your tires? You've checked them for adequate pressure?"

Amy's grin widened. She curled her lips inward to hide her smile.

"Yes. 35 psi in front, 40 psi in rear."

Sheldon hummed in approval, latching his seat belt. Amy double checked her mirrors before turning and patting his arm reassuringly.

"Sheldon, everything will be alright. We're only going to Santa Monica. It's just a 25 mile drive. Please relax. You're in good hands. I promise," she winked, and it was her wink that set his mind totally at ease. He blushed and looked down, embarrassed.

"Yes…I know I'm in good hands. I should have known better to even ask. You are the most careful and efficient driver I've ever known, even beating out Leonard. Especially since he has the bad habit of singing while driving. Singing! How dangerous is that? What's next, Break dancing?"

Amy chuckled at her adorable boyfriend. Despite feeling like death warmed over, she couldn't help but feel her mood lift at sharing a laugh with him.

After leaving work and stopping to buy some zinc, she went home and fell asleep for two hours. She'd hoped she'd feel better after some rest, but no such luck. She looked pale and drawn as she changed clothing, trying in vain to put on some blush to perk up her color. It seemed the more she added, the less well she looked.

'_It's nothing. Just a sore throat'_, she repeated to herself, over and over.

Amy took a slight detour, allowing them to drive along the Pacific Coast Highway as they neared the restaurant. Sheldon marveled at the breathtaking scenery. Living in Pasadena was nice, but the mountains obscured this pristine coastline. The sun was hanging low in the sky, sending a deep orange haze across the Pacific. He lay his head back on the headrest, watching Amy as she drove. His eyes followed her face down to her hands, watching as she shifted gears seamlessly.

Everything about Amy Farrah Fowler was perfect. He didn't know if it was the crazy love juice swimming around in his blood talking, or some greater force that he had no control over. Why was it so daunting, surrendering to what he knew he felt? Why couldn't he just reach over, and touch her face? Caress her neck? He smiled at her as she turned to him, her beauty enhanced by the soft light of the coming twilight.

They arrived at the restaurant, a beautiful place called Catch in the Casa Del Mar Hotel. Amy was stunned as the maître d escorted them to their table, which was situated right by the window affording them a magnificent ocean view.

"Sheldon, this is amazing. Did you know how lovely this restaurant was?" Amy gushed, taking off her cardigan and placing it behind her on her chair. Sheldon gulped at the fact she wasn't wearing her customary layers, but a thin silk dress underneath. Dragging his eyes away from the soft looking material, he met her delighted gaze.

"Yes, I researched it thoroughly. Are you pleased?" He asked hopefully.

"Sheldon…this is beautiful. Yes, I'm very pleased. Well worth the trip. Although the scenery and the company were worth any amount of miles," she said sweetly, flashing him her best smile.

And just like that, Sheldon felt his heart ignite in his chest. He smiled back, the action lighting up his entire face. When Amy looked at him like that, he felt on top of the world.

They talked and laughed, conversation flowing freely. Amy enjoyed herself, except for the fact her throat was aching her. She tried to carry on her end of the conversation as normally as possible, but towards the end of their meal, her energy was flagging. Swallowing even the easy seafood risotto she chose turned out to be a monumental task.

"Dr. Gablehauser said that he was impressed with my work as a Jr. Professor. I told him thank you, but not to get any ideas; I wasn't going to go into teaching full time. Yet I have to say, lately teaching isn't as bad as it used to be," Sheldon said, wonder in his voice.

Amy smiled and took a sip of her iced tea. The cold beverage wasn't as soothing as she hoped it would be; it stung on the way down and Amy found herself wincing. She cleared her throat, the action sending her into another coughing jag. Sheldon watched her intently, taking notice for the first time tonight of Amy's discomfort. She caught his intrusive stare, and quickly collected herself.

"I'm sure Dr. Gablehauser doesn't want to lose you as a full time Theoretical Physicist. But I can guarantee you he is happy that you are helping to shape the minds of tomorrow, Sheldon. You should be proud that they chose you to assist in that. Teaching is an honorable profession. Who better to teach than a genius such as yourself?"

Sheldon pondered her flattering words. Yes, he could see where his expertise would be useful in teaching Physics to up and coming Scientists. He didn't know why he held on to the staunch belief that if he were a full time Professor, he would lose his freedom as a Scientist. After all, having a PhD meant that you were a master in your field, and had earned the privilege to teach it. He should have felt honored that he was so highly regarded. Why, instead, did he feel like it was a burden?

"Thank you, Amy." He whispered, once again awed by her ability to soothe him.

The last vestiges of sunset had left a warm glow across the beach. Sheldon studied his girlfriend as she gazed out to sea, admiring the way the light caught her just so.

She looked tired tonight. Her normally vivid eyes seemed dull. She was probably as tired as he was, poor kid, after waking up so early.

"Did you finish your cataloguing today? Or was it lecturing all morning?" He casually asked as they finished their meal. Amy took another sip of tea before answering.

"Mostly lecturing. I finished what I had to do and went home early."

Sheldon nodded absently, not picking up on the end of her statement.

The waiter came by their table, refilling their water glasses and dropping a dessert menu next to Sheldon.

"Would you like to share a desert, Amy? They have what looks to be a fantastic chocolate tart on the menu," Sheldon gushed, but frowned when Amy shook her head.

"No thank you, Sheldon. I'm not in the mood tonight. You go ahead and enjoy one, though."

Sheldon decided to decline as well. He didn't want to admit that he enjoyed the idea of kissing her later with chocolate tasting lips. It wasn't half as much fun eating chocolate alone.

The waiter brought the check by, Sheldon snatching it up quickly as Amy reached for her purse.

"What is my share?" She asked him, already digging around for her wallet. Sheldon waved her off, slipping his credit card in the slot on the top.

"My treat tonight, Dr. Fowler."

Amy blinked once. Twice. Three times.

"What?"

Sheldon looked up, smirking at Amy's vacant stare.

"I said, my treat. I didn't ask you to this fancy restaurant, an hour from home, just so we could go Dutch. It just wouldn't be gentlemanly."

Amy blinked three more times, happily surprised.

"O-Okay. Thank you, Sheldon."

Sheldon briskly signed his name, putting his credit card back in his wallet.

"My pleasure, Amy. Shall we go?"

They left the restaurant, Sheldon escorting Amy outside to the valet station and slipping the valet their ticket. Amy watched him as he stood beside her, tall and handsome. She always felt proud to be on the arm of Sheldon Cooper; he had a presence few men carried. He really had no idea just how attractive he was. She smiled at him over the roof of the car when the valet returned, loving how he blushed because he knew she was admiring him.

The full moon was beginning to rise over the water, lighting up the beach. Amy decided to go back the way they came, so they could enjoy the scenery.

"Did you enjoy your dinner?" He asked her as they drove in silence. Amy nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh, yes. Did you?"

Sheldon nodded without speaking, eyes still glued to her. When Amy turned to him after not hearing his answer, her heart skipped a beat at the look on his face. She smiled at him, but the smile didn't reach her eyes like it normally did.

Something wasn't right. Sheldon wasn't the best at reading facial cues. But he knew Amy better than anyone else did, and her carefully constructed mannerisms. And what was up with her voice tonight? Her normally husky voice entranced him with its dulcet register. But she sounded like she was in pain somehow. Now that he looked closer at her, he noticed the dark circles that lined her lower eyes. Did losing a few hours of sleep really have this degree of effect on her?

"Amy… are you alright?" He ventured, concerned that she had been so reserved all evening. He was flying blind here, trying to gauge her mood.

Amy's attention was focused on the road, watching the lights twinkle in the distance as she drove.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. I'm a bit distracted tonight," She said by way of apology. Sheldon reached over and touched her shoulder gently. The uncharacteristic gesture startled Amy. His frown deepened as he felt her slight flinch.

"Amy…I'm worried about you. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?" He asked quietly.

Amy turned to him in the dimly lit car, offering him a placid smile. It was rare that he was so kind to her, especially concerning what he deemed her 'hippy dippy feelings'.

"You really mean that?" She asked him, touched.

He cocked his head in confusion.

"Of course I mean that. You're my girlfriend. Your well – being is of the utmost importance to me."

The serious way he said it brought tears to Amy's eyes. She bit her bottom lip to keep from crying.

"Thank you, Sheldon. That means a lot to me. But you don't have to worry."

Sheldon studied her a moment. She was hiding something. He was sure of it. But he had no right to try and pry it out of her when she'd spent the better part of 4 years trying to do the same with him. He realized in that moment that he was on the receiving end what she must have been feeling for so long.

And he found that he didn't like it. At all.

"Okay," he breathed, deciding to give her the space she needed. Leonard had once told him that with women, it could go one of two ways: either they wanted space, or they wanted you to smother them with affection. He wasn't sure how he should proceed, but he didn't think that smothering Amy with affection while she was driving was a smart idea.

Amy reached over and put her hand upon his knee.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. I know I'm not very good company tonight. But I had an amazing time. You picked a gorgeous restaurant. I was very impressed. I'm just tired. It has been a long week," She said, once again turning toward the windshield and disrupting Sheldon from his own distracted thoughts.

Sheldon looked down to her hand that was laying on his knee. He felt a strange, unsettling feeling seeping into his body. Foreboding. That was the feeling. It swept through him from head to toe, and left a chill in his veins.

That was crazy. Still, he couldn't shake the sense something wasn't right. He had no experience with relationships, other than Amy. He couldn't draw on past mistakes because there simply weren't any. But he and Amy had always been honest, from the very first moment they met. If there was a problem, they would deal with it.

"Have I done something wrong, Amy?" He asked, apprehension in his soft voice. Amy's eyes flew over to him. He looked positively frightened, and it tugged at her heart.

"No, Sheldon. I'm sorry. Look… I've been feeling poorly all day. My throat began to hurt yesterday, and I was afraid to tell you. I know how you get about sickness-…"

Sheldon cut her off, turning in the seat to face her fully.

"Your throat hurts? Why didn't you tell me you were sick? I knew something wasn't right. We should head back to your apartment and I will make you some tea and take care of you." He said in irritation, clearly upset she withheld that information. She dared a glance in his direction, and he was watching her with a mixture of worry and…something.

She had no idea what came over her in that moment. Suddenly, she was feeling stir crazy and she needed to get out of this car. The ocean looked so beautiful tonight, lit up by the moonlight. Who knew the next time she could get Sheldon to the seashore? She decided to take her opportunity.

Pulling off the road, Amy parked in a small lot overlooking the beach. Sheldon looked startled at the sudden halting of the car, and looked out the windshield.

"What are we doing here? Why did you stop? Did we run out of gas? Are you sure the car had a full tank? Amy! We should be heading home to nurse that cold you are probably getting."

Amy smiled at him, putting the car into park. He was nothing if not sensible.

"Come on, Sheldon. Take a walk with me."

Amy exited the car, and Sheldon panicked, jumping out and racing around to her side in a flash. What if she fell down in the dark and added a broken leg to her sore throat? He would have to take a week off from work just to nurse her back to health. That would seriously cut into his research time.

"Take a walk? Are you crazy? There is no way we are going down to that water. I knew it was a mistake, bringing you to the seaside," he spat out, glaring at her with annoyance. Amy was nonplussed, though.

"It isn't far to the shore," she said casually.

Sheldon looked around the darkened beach apprehensively.

"But, it's dark out there."

Amy pulled off her shoes, throwing them in the backseat. Sheldon watched them flying through the air with wide eyes. What had gotten into her?

"Yes, but it's a full moon. It should light our path. Come on. Take my hand."

He didn't look convinced, standing by the car as though it would protect him from what she was suggesting. Holding out her hand, she watched as Sheldon stared at it with a nervous look on his face.

"Sheldon, come with me. Let's take a walk. The fresh air will do us both good. We're stuck inside all week. Besides…the salty air will help my throat."

Sheldon couldn't argue with her logic. Taking her hand gingerly, he allowed her to lead him down the path leading to the water's edge. It took a few minutes to reach the shore, the boom of the surf almost deafening. But when they arrived there, it was magical. The wind was cool, whipping around them like a second skin. Sheldon watched as it flung Amy's hair across her shoulders, blowing if away from her face. She looked beautiful out here, like some storm tossed Siren.

He remembered back to his childhood in Galveston, how every summer weekend his family would head to the beach. There would be bonfires with hot dog roasts, s'mores, and the like. What should have been enjoyable for him was a tedious annoyance. He didn't like sand, didn't like being forced to watch half naked people cavorting on said sand, and would have been happier being home alone. All of a sudden, that thought made him extremely unsettled.

It shouldn't have been that way. Why couldn't he have been born like everyone else? Why did he have this…_thing_…inside of him that set him apart from everyone else? His whole life, he had considered this a gift; to not be like the masses of mundane humans clamoring for any cheap thrill. Now, he was rapidly fearing what he had been given was a curse. He snapped out of his dark thoughts when Amy turned to him, making sure he was still in one piece.

"See, not so bad right?" Amy ventured, tugging Sheldon along through the soft sand. He shook his head, offering her a genuine smile.

Sheldon had to concede. "Not so bad, Dr. Fowler."

They walked parallel to the water, Amy still holding Sheldon's hand tightly. Amy looked pensive as her eyes focused on the beach up ahead. Sheldon cleared his throat, catching her attention.

"Amy? What has you so distracted? He asked, his voice quiet beneath the crash of the surf.

Amy shrugged. "I told you, Sheldon…I'm tired."

If she said she was tired, then she was tired. And yet…

"Very well. I was just concerned about you. You haven't been yourself tonight."

Amy considered that statement.

"I suppose you're right. Don't you ever just not feel like yourself, Sheldon?"

Sheldon kicked the sand with the toe of his shoe as they walked along.

"I haven't felt like myself for a very long time," he murmured, the reflection in his voice evident.

Amy stopped walking. Sheldon came up short, digging his feet in the sand for leverage at their sudden halt. They stared at one another in the moonlight, and Sheldon suddenly felt his mouth going dry.

"What do you mean by that?" She asked softly. There was something there that told him his choice of words opened a can of worms.

He turned to the surf, watching as the waves rolled in. He knew what he meant, and he knew without a doubt she did too. He was a different man now, then when he first met her at that coffee shop. He hardly recognized himself anymore. The jury was still out on whether that was a good or bad thing, but his stubborn pride would not admit that.

"I don't know what I mean. I don't know what I'm doing lately," he said, his voice sounding sad.

Amy watched his struggle, wishing he could just say what was in his heart.

"I think you do, Sheldon. I think you're doing just fine," she said gently.

Sheldon whirled around, shooting her a look of bewilderment.

"Really? I don't know how you _can_ think that. I…" He faltered, closing his eyes in frustration.

Amy sighed, wringing her hands together.

"It's alright, Sheldon. I know that this is hard for you. And I don't expect you to suddenly have all of the answers. I've already told you…I won't push you, ever again. But…"

He didn't like the sound of that.

"But?" He asked, his voice high.

Amy swallowed roughly. The time had come, her heart demanded, to get some answers. They were alone, miles from home, away from the intrusive reminders of who Sheldon and Amy usually were. She _had_ to find out the truth. She had a fleeting fear that she may never get the chance again, if she didn't seize it now.

"Sheldon… Something has been on my mind lately. I've tried to push it aside, but I guess it's been more of a burden than I thought. There's something I need to know."

Sheldon watched her apprehensively, feeling a sinister chill envelop him which had nothing to do with the wind. He raised his brows, waiting for her to elaborate.

"Yes?" He whispered, rooted to the spot. He was certain she was going to ask him again if they were ever going to be intimate. And this time, he feared, he knew he would break down and admit to her that it was more than a possibility. It was a most definite probability. And that it was all he could think about lately.

He waited with baited breath as she tried to formulate the words which could lay him bare.

"Are you…Do you trust me, Sheldon? Are there things you feel you cannot confide in me about?" She rushed out, daring not to breathe as she watched Sheldon take her words in.

Sheldon gasped quietly. Well…that was_ not_ what he expected. Where in the world did that come from?

"_Confide_ in you? I don't know what you mean." He said truthfully.

Amy stared right through him, her green gaze sharper than a laser. Sheldon felt like this conversation had taken a grave turn. He looked down lest he be turned to a pile of ash.

"Yes, confide in me. As in not being afraid to share your concerns or your fears with me. Trusting me enough to support you and keep your confidence. Can you do that, Sheldon?"

Sheldon felt like he was watching a play unfolding on some grand stage, only _he_ was the star. And he never got a copy of the script. He was lost on how to proceed, or where his mark was.

Confide in her? But didn't he already do that?

His eyes found hers in the darkness and he felt like he was under a spotlight.

_And, action._

"Amy…I'm not…I don't…you…I…I do confide in you. I just have trouble dealing with certain issues. You know how difficult it is for me to talk about them," He said quietly.

Amy watched the emotions cross Sheldon's face like stars shooting across the northern sky. Was he actually _this_ scared of her? Why did she reduce him to a stuttering tower of insecurities?

The words slipped out of her mouth before she could stop herself.

"You don't seem to have the same hesitancy discussing your concerns or problems with Penny."

Her voice was sad, stark, and made Sheldon's blood run cold. He stared at her, his face a mask of confusion.

_Penny?_

"What? What does Penny have to do with anything?" He asked, genuinely flummoxed. Was there some great clue here he wasn't getting?

Amy cursed her insecurity. Well, what's done is done. She decided it was time to put on her big girl panties. There was a time she would have told Sheldon her concerns, outright. Hell, they parted ways in the beginning of their friendship because she was brave enough to voice her opinion. Where did that woman go?

Bracing herself, she walked up to Sheldon, standing so closely that the wind couldn't pass between them. Sheldon's breath caught in his throat at her nearness.

"You always find a way to ask Penny for help solving a dilemma. You never hesitate to answer her personal questions. You are comfortable with her in a way you've never been with me. You've slept in her bed, but you would never think to sleep in mine. You allow her to sing you Soft Kitty, but balk at the idea of me doing it. Sometimes, Sheldon…I feel like you don't really need me."

The sound of the water against the sand roared in his ears. Of all the things Amy could have told him, this was the last he'd ever imagined.

Sheldon took a step toward her, even closer now.

"How could you even think such a thing, Amy? Why would you say that? I don't…I don't understand. Why on Earth would I have boy/girl feelings towards Penny?"

Amy smiled sadly. He really didn't get it. It was part of his charm, this boyish naivete. She would have to spell it out for him, and she hated that.

"Sheldon…Penny is a beautiful woman. And the two of you have long history of friendship together. When I suggested that experiment, you seemed all too excited to participate. I was curious as to why. And truthfully? I was a bit nervous that it would work."

A slow realization dawned on Sheldon's face. He wasn't as clueless as everyone thought about the matters of sex and attraction. Just because he had never been physical with a woman before Amy, didn't mean he was ignorant. He _was_ a genius, after all. He knew immediately what Amy was saying, and the fact she was saying it at all made him feel like someone knocked the wind out of him.

He turned and walked a few paces ahead of her, his tall form in the darkness looking like a specter. She waited quietly while he seemed to weigh his words carefully. Thrusting his hands in his pockets, he addressed her, but didn't turn around.

"You really think so little of me, that I would…what? Betray you somehow? Betray Leonard? Really, Amy?"

Hearing the words come out of his mouth, they sounded so much worse than she thought. He sounded…wounded. She couldn't answer him, though. Couldn't think clearly. Her head hurt, her chest hurt…everything hurt. Especially her heart, as she saw what her words were doing to Sheldon. But they were her feelings, and she had every right to voice them.

Her silence only added to Sheldon's distress. He could see that this was truly bothering her. Was _this_ what had been on her mind lately?

He opened his mouth, a helpless groan escaping.

"Amy…I have never had any romantic feelings for Penny. I have never looked at her in such a way. She is my friend. She has become like family to me, which is saying something, since that Nebraskan Cornhusker gets on my nerves more than anyone else. To think you would assume-"

Amy rushed up to Sheldon, halting him in his tracks.

"I didn't assume, Sheldon. You can't deny every word I said was true. And I didn't think about that experiment, not at first. But I realized something later on. You instigated it. You jumped at the chance. And I was curious as to why. At first, it was the Neuroscientist in me that wondered. But later…it was the woman who's in a relationship with you."

Sheldon rounded on her, his heart pounding wildly.

"I jumped at the chance, as you say, to prove a point! A Scientific point."

"What point exactly?" she asked desperately.

_What point?_

"That I am was not worried about falling in love with Penny! That something so preposterous could never happen. That I was secure in that knowledge. And do you know why, Dr. Fowler? Did you ever bother to wonder why? Because I love _you_! What, you think I go around, professing my love to women all over the Greater Los Angeles area?

"No, Sheldon. I know-"

"You know? What do you know? How long have you felt this way?"

Amy looked in his eyes, unblinking.

"A while."

Sheldon could only stare at her in shock.

"A while…" He echoed. "How long is awhile?"

Amy bit her lip.

"Since the night you found Bernadette and me at the bar. The night you went to see the psychic with Penny."

A pit opened at Sheldon's feet, and he felt he was falling. Down, down, down he went…his breathe leaving him in a whoosh. Amy gazed at him calmly, not giving away anything. His heart began to thump wildly in his chest, banging against his ribs.

"You…you knew about that? Us seeing a psychic?" He asked, his voice cracking painfully. Amy nodded, pursing her lips.

"Yes, I knew. Penny texted Leonard while we were still at the bar after the both of you stormed out. I was shocked, Sheldon. The fact you of all people, willingly going to see a psychic. Leonard blew it off, saying Penny could be very persuasive. I didn't see it then, or maybe I didn't want to, but…it dawned on me that Penny could lead you down any road, and you would follow her blindingly. Full of trust. I have to pull you kicking and screaming to try anything new. I don't know…Maybe I'm being a fool. But it hurts, Sheldon." Amy shook her head sadly, and Sheldon felt his heart begin to squeeze in his chest. He would have to call his cardiologist and make an appointment.

"Amy…it was Anything Can Happen Thursday. I only went along with Penny because of that."

She nodded slowly.

"I know, Sheldon. And I know that you felt betrayed by me because I lied to you about being sick. I should have been honest with you then. But you didn't give me a chance. You stormed off with Penny, and refused to speak to me for two days."

The hurt tone of her voice tore at him. A sickening thought began to bloom in his stomach.

"Amy…do you not trust me?" He whispered, and the lump in Amy's throat grew. She gasped in frustration, shaking her head frantically.

"That's the point, Sheldon. I do trust you. I just…I want you to trust me too. I want you to let me in!"

Sheldon stared down at his girlfriend, his heart nearly bursting. He didn't know how to do this.

"Amy…You're in. Trust me. Sometimes…I can't think about anything else but you. Do you have any idea how terrifying it is for me, of all people, to not be able to formulate a rational thought because all I can think about is being with you? Talking to you? Kissing you? I am trying to get a grip on these…emotions… I feel like I am walking a tightrope," He admitted softly. Amy rubbed her arms against the wind, approaching him in the cool sand beneath her feet.

She could understand his fears. They weren't anything she herself hadn't felt a million times in the last four years. The scary uncertainty of where they were, what it meant, where they were headed. It terrified her. And yet, she craved it.

She had fallen so in love with this man at her side, that she was certain no one else could ever come close. She knew without a doubt she had to keep her longings for a future of living together and marriage hidden, at least for now. Sheldon was nowhere near ready to hear those words out of her mouth.

She gently put her hand on the middle of his back, and to her relief, he didn't pull away. Rather, he turned to face her, the action causing her hand to slide around and come to rest upon his chest. He glanced down from her eyes to the hand resting on his sternum. He loved the warm weight of it there.

"I do trust you, Sheldon. I just wish you could open up to me. I know you don't like feeling so vulnerable. And I know it worries you that you are in a confusing place. I just can't bear the thought that you resent me for it. I'm afraid too," She said, and Sheldon stepped closer to her, leaning down to whisper so she could hear over the surf.

"What are you afraid of?" He asked tenderly, and Amy shook her head.

"Well…this for one," She admitted, tilting her chin to indicate the both of them. "You."

Sheldon frowned, his heart stinging at her statement.

"Me? You're afraid of me? Why?" He asked, his big eyes wide with fear.

"As I said before, I don't want you to resent me. Or regret anything that happens between us. I don't want to feel like I could lose you if I say the wrong thing."

Sheldon shook his head in astonishment. _Lose him?_

It was always going to come back to his leaving on that train, wasn't it?

Sheldon shook his head in sadness.

"Resent you? Amy…I could never resent you. Don't you know that?" He whispered.

Her wary eyes met his, and he could see the raw honesty there. His heart stuttered in his chest as he realized how sweet and perfect she was. He could stack her up against anyone on this planet, and she would always, always…come out the victor. Her beautiful mind, sharp wit, and natural beauty had turned his entire world upside down. Sheldon reached his arms out, drawing Amy closer by taking her around the waist.

_Perhaps she is so confused because you've never told her. Maybe you purposefully keep her at arms- length because the thought of her knowing everything about you scares the living daylights out of you._

Would he ever get this right? Or would he continually feel like he was on the outside looking in?

"Amy... I am so sorry that you think in this or any other universe that I would choose Penny over you. I don't. And I wouldn't," he said softly. "You are very special to me. I know I have many issues. But please…have patience with me." He implored, his soulful eyes boring into hers.

This was a side of Sheldon that Amy rarely got to witness. She managed to nod her head, and Sheldon took that as a good sign.

Leaning in, he gathered Amy in his arms, hugging her tightly. The feel of her, so soft and yielding against his chest, gave him a feeling of utter completion. Sheldon closed his eyes, resting his head against her hair as her cheek met his chest. Why did she always smell like apples? He inhaled deeply. They stood like that for a time, until Sheldon drew her back and looked at her with a serious expression.

"We're in a good place, aren't we Amy?"

Amy smiled faintly.

"Yes, Sheldon. A very good place."

Sheldon nodded, licking his lips. "Good…Now I think it's time we went home so I can fulfill my obligations of the relationship agreement, and make you that cup of tea. Let's go."

All business, no nonsense Dr. Sheldon Cooper was back. Amy grinned as Sheldon trudged back up the path to the car, dragging her gently behind him.

A/N – Next chapter: The calm before the storm. Board up your windows now.


	6. Chapter 6

~Chapter 6~

A/N – Your support and interest in this story continues to overwhelm me. I am so happy I can share my vision of Sheldon and Amy's love story with you. For those who are already annoyed at Sheldon...this might be a good time to grab a brownie and remember how sweet he _can _be to Amy. While our favorite Physicist is growing, he hasn't quite arrived there. Yet.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Well your faith was strong but you needed proof, you saw her bathing on the roof, her beauty and the moonlight overthrew you - She tied you to her kitchen chair, she broke your throne and she cut your hair, and from your lips she drew the Hallelujah…" Jeff Buckley – Hallelujah

Sheldon stared at the digital clock on his bedside table, a scornful expression on his face. The blasted thing was _mocking_ him. He was sure of it.

He watched as the blue numbers changed one by one, pushing forward toward dawn and drawing him further away from the slumber he so desperately needed.

_Good Lord…how in the world will I function at full capacity when I cannot achieve sufficient REM sleep?_ He thought bitterly.

What fresh hell was he in now?

He was wide awake, but not because of another prophetic, disturbing dream. No, he hadn't been able to fall asleep at all. It was past 3:00 am and he was still unable to shut down his mind. Tossing and turning in restlessness he finally decided to get out of bed, flinging off his covers in a huff.

Ambling out to the living room, he paced the floor in agitation. He was tired, cranky, and confused. Three emotions Sheldon Cooper did not welcome. All of these emotional conversations with Amy were taking their toll on the lanky Physicist. Tonight's was no exception.

After spending an hour at Amy's in which he made her tea, tidied up her apartment, rubbed her neck, and put her to bed, he got the bus home and dragged himself upstairs wearily. Amy had waited patiently for a kiss goodnight, even sitting up in bed with puckered lips. Sheldon pinched up his face, looking at her aghast.

"_There is no way I am going to kiss you and run the risk of getting your germs_," He said thunderstruck, patting her on the head instead like a puppy. He could see Amy's disappointment, but that was too bad, he reasoned.

Did she honestly expect him to leave himself open to getting a cold because she couldn't keep her lips to herself? Sheldon chuffed in indignation at the liberties that Vixen was attempting to take. Honestly…tell a woman you love her, and you become her perpetual snuggle bunny. Where did one draw the line?

His mind drifted back to their conversation at the beach. He was absolutely certain that being in such a romantic setting, Amy would want to paw him like a bear. But no…it seemed pawing him was the_ last _thing on her mind. If she had wanted to tip his world off its axis, she did a fantastic job.

He was having trouble reconciling her words. She _honestly_ thought he confided in Penny more than her? Or that he had some latent attraction to her that he kept hidden? The thought made him grimace. What on God's green Earth had put that idea into her head?

It was true, he had a comfortable relationship with Penny. After all, as Penny once said…she kicked a bully in the privates for him. And even though she was loud, obnoxious, and her meddling ways drove him batty…Penny had turned out to be a good friend. But that was all she was.

_Period. _

He had no idea how Amy could be jealous of Penny. And it grieved him to think she had been carrying this around with her for almost a year. He could only attribute her miscalculation to the fact that Penny was, indeed, a bad influence on her. And that her Community College level of thinking had ultimately rubbed off on his formerly astute girlfriend.

_Penny_ didn't set him aflame with a mere look. _Penny_ didn't drive him to distraction with her sexy voice. Her brilliance. Or her pure beauty.

Didn't Amy realize how much she herself had turned his entire world topsy-turvy? Or was this part of her devious plot; reel him in like a fish on a hook, leaving him floundering on the shore to suffocate? She was getting him right where she wanted him. The idea made his blood boil. How _dare _she? Didn't she understand what kind of chaos he'd been experiencing? The agony of being forced to do a 360 degree turn, just to accommodate her into his life?

If being forced to wade through the mire of his feelings wasn't exhausting enough, now he had to contend with the fact that being pair bonded to such an interesting, brilliant, and beautiful woman brought all kinds of predators out of the woodwork. That Geology hack Bert, for one. Who did he think he was, giving _his_ girlfriend rocks and gems like some prehistoric caveman? And, most recently, his arch nemesis Barry Kripke.

He loathed the white hot, searing anger he experienced when another male gave her attention. The kind of attention that was completely inappropriate. He thought he expunged that demon when he won Amy away from Stuart. He had won the battle. But he never really won the war.

If he were honest, he'd have to admit his penchant for jealously began long before Stuart. It began with Zack.

Sheldon bristled at the memory of_ that_ particular conversation.

'_Let's look at this logically. I have a stomach, I get hungry. I have genitals, I have the potential for sexual arousal.'_

Sheldon shivered, even now. How could she have been attracted to that…buffoon? It just wasn't logical.

Did she know, even then, how crazy she was driving him? How he had never in his life felt so helpless to his burgeoning feelings as he did at that moment? Sure, he had called Zack and set up that meeting between the two, with the intent for them to engage in coitus. But as she walked away from him in that bar, sidling up to Zack and pouring out her strange desires to him, Sheldon couldn't help but think that there was no way in Heaven and Hell that the Neanderthal named Zack was good enough for Amy Farrah Fowler.

_You wanted her, even then. You wanted her from the moment she impressed you at the coffee shop, telling you outright that any forms of physical contact up to and including coitus were off the table. She intrigued you with her wit, floored you with her intelligence, and baffled you with her aloofness. Not to mention her beauty, which drew him like a moth to a flame. Hers was the most dangerous type of beauty. It was one where she didn't even know she possessed it. And that, more than anything, sealed his fate. _

Bottom line…he was done before he even began.

Sheldon smacked his lips in annoyance. Over their acquaintance, Amy had expressed physical desire for men other than himself, whereas he never expressed desire for any woman, _especially_ Penny. So how could she even entertain such a thought?

Amy Farrah Fowler Amy was driving him around the bend, and back again.

It used to be so simple, he reasoned. He woke up, ate his appointed breakfast on the appointed day, showered, dressed, went to work, ate lunch, came home, ate dinner, watched TV, played games, read, worked, surfed the net, and then he went to bed.

Simple. Ordered. Structured.

Now, everything had changed.

His thoughts centered on what _Amy_ was doing, what _Amy_ felt, where _Amy_ was. His plans included what _she_ wanted to do. His friends asked what _she_ was up to. His colleagues at work said _she _was brilliant._ She_ was admired. _She_ was a perfect match for him.

It used to all be about Sheldon.

Now, it was all about _Amy_.

_Doesn't she know I am trying? That I am turning myself inside out for her?_

Somewhere along the way, the lines had been blurred. They weren't separate entities anymore, but a _unit. _

The Scientist inside of him was terrified that his perfect intellect would be snuffed out because this emotional attachment would overrun all logical thought. What was next for them, anyhow? Picking daisies in a meadow? Chasing rainbows after a rainstorm?

Sheldon sighed, shaking his head. He decided to make some tea. A hot beverage always helped, even though last night it didn't. He reasoned it was better when someone else made it for you. But seeing how it was now 3:40 am, he wasn't so sure Leonard would be happy with him waking him up to ask him to make it. As he waited for the kettle to boil, Sheldon looked around the room. His eyes landed on the coffee table, and that was when he saw it.

Howard and Bernadette had been over earlier, having gone to dinner with Leonard and Penny. Apparently, they brought over some pictures of both last Valentine's weekend and Prom night, and the glossy reminders were sitting in a neat pile across the glass.

Abandoning the tea, he made his way to the table, picking up the pile and sifting through them in feigned disinterest. The prom pictures were on top, and when he saw the photos of Amy in her blue dress, he immediately had to move on. There was no way he could dwell on her loveliness that night and not fall apart at the seams.

Next were the Napa weekend; the four of them at various moments, compliments of the owners of the B &amp; B. Sheldon smiled as he flipped through them, despite himself. He rolled his eyes at his blatant sappiness. They were only pictures, for Heaven sake.

There were a few of Sheldon, looking clueles and out of place. And even a few of Amy on her own, smiling widely and looking spellbound by the property. But there, right there…

Something caught his eye. Pulling it out of the pile, he gasped. He threw down the other pictures to the table, clutching the one he found and holding it close to his face.

It was the morning after their first real kiss, at breakfast. Someone had snapped a picture of the two of them sitting at a table side by side. Amy was smiling down into her plate. Sheldon sat close to her; so close he was actually leaning into her shoulder, their bodies touching intimately.

And the look he was giving her…

Good Lord.

Sheldon's heart started beating faster than ever as he took in the picture. He looked…so…_in love_.

He was watching her as she smiled, a slight smile on his own face. She looked so beautiful. He was gazing at her in complete…adoration? That was the only word he could manage. What was she thinking, that put such a radiant smile upon her face? The sunlight was streaming in through the window at Amy's left, illuminating them both. Her face was lit from within, her chestnut hair shining like fire.

Sheldon stumbled back towards the couch, falling on it with a thump. He held the picture in his hand, unable to look away. His mind emptied of everything. After a few minutes, he dropped the picture on his lap and reached up to rub his temples.

_Recite the Periodic Table_… he ordered himself, but he couldn't remember the atomic weights.

_Focus! Recite Einstein's theories of Relativity, Gravity, and Light_.

Nothing…what the hell was going on? He had an eidetic memory!

Panicking, Sheldon jumped up and did a circuit around the coffee table, running his hands through his hair.

"Lord…why are you doing this to me?" He said aloud, sweat beginning to break out on his brow.

He didn't believe in a deity. He didn't believe in fate. Or love at first sight. Or any of that poppycock that romance novelists and screenplay writer's wanted you to believe.

He believed in Mathematical certainties. Cold facts. Hard science.

Proof.

Coming back to the couch, he picked up the picture that had fallen to the floor. He stared down at it, spellbound by the beautiful couple he could hardly believe he was a part of, and remembered Penny's words when he tried to break up with Amy last spring over that stupid table.

'_Maybe you're a frog who was kissed by a princess, and turned into a prince.'…._

If proof was what he wanted, then proof was what he got.

How had this happened to him?

So…he'd loved her, even then. Probably since the very first. Which, of course, was impossible. Because he didn't believe in such a ridiculous concept.

Right?

Sheldon's fingers began to tremble as he gripped the picture with one hand, and traced her face with the other.

"Oh, Amy…what have you done?" He whispered, his eyes flitting back and forth between the angel on the left, and the besotted fool on her rightz.

"Vixen," he said, his voice faltering.

There would be no sleep again that night for the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

"Dude, I'm telling you. Yoda _should_ have known. The fall of the alliance was unfolding, and he couldn't see it? One might go so far as to say, he _allowed_ it to happen. All of those Jedi's…even younglings. That's cold."

Howard stopped short as he piled a sandwich onto his tray, shooting his best friend a withering look.

"Yoda was a Jedi Master, Raj. Not a psychic." He said in exasperation.

"Yeah, maybe. But he still should have _'foreseen'_ it," Raj said, using air quotes. Howard shook his head.

"Are you going to be dissecting every aspect of Star Wars until the new film comes out? That's still almost a year away."

Raj gave him a sidelong glance.

"Perhaps…use the force, Howard. Look inside yourself for the answer you seek."

"Alright, that's enough of that." The engineer quipped, locating Sheldon sitting at their normal table in the cafeteria.

Howard and Raj sat down, greeting Sheldon with a 'hey'. Sheldon didn't even raise his head to offer them a hello, instead pushing around pasta salad around his plate with his fork. He looked lost in thought. Howard tried again, his tone gentle.

"Hey, Sheldon. How was your morning? Were you and Alex able to cast those diagram modules like you planned?"

Sheldon finally looked up from his plate, his eyes bleary and unfocused. He looked somewhere beyond Howard's shoulder, not meeting his eye.

"Somewhat. It's been slow going. I have yet to plug the calculations into my laptop. I'm far behind on my morning work so I won't be able to make Vintage game night tonight," He said, a hint of frustration in his tone.

"That's alright, Sheldon. Bernie and I are meeting her parent's for dinner, and I think Leonard and Penny want to stay in for a movie. Maybe next week," he said hopefully. Sheldon managed a small nod.

Raj bent his head intrusively, meeting Sheldon's eyes.

"You look awful, Sheldon." He said, pointing out the obvious.

Sheldon huffed and shot him a murderous look that made Raj focus on his food.

"If you must know, I couldn't sleep last night. I think after lunch I will return to my office and try to engage in a nap. I haven't sleep completely in over two days, and I can't focus on anything."

Howard chewed his sandwich thoughtfully, he and Raj exchanging glances.

"Wasn't last night date night for you and Amy?" Howard asked slyly, raising his brows. Sheldon's eyes narrowed in turn.

"Yes, what is your point?" He asked sharply, his blue eyes boring into Howards.

"No point, Sheldon. Just trying to connect the dots," he said, waggling his eyebrows for emphasis.

Sheldon stared at him for a full ten seconds, trying to decipher his meaning.

Oh…of course. It _always_ came back to sex for Wolowitz.

While in the past, his leering would bring on a casual indifference from Sheldon, now it bothered him immensely. While he knew his friend meant no harm, and even in fact liked Amy, he didn't like how he constantly disrespected their relationship. Sheldon threw his fork down, the plastic utensil making a clanging sound against the plate. His friends looked up, startled.

"Now I will say this once and once only. Stop making jokes about my relationship and my date nights with Amy. I know you find it hilarious to rib me about it, but after four years, it's getting old. Are we clear?" He asked, standing up and gathering his things. Howard and Raj nodded their heads.

"Sheldon, we didn't mean anything by it. We're just kidding. And we're sorry." Howard offered, feeling truly bad. He and Sheldon had formed a tentative truce recently, and he didn't want to set their newfound respect back. Besides, he honestly liked Amy. No one else tolerated Neil Diamond like she did.

Sheldon pursed his lips, giving them a quick nod. He supposed it was the macho male thing to do, teasing your friends about their love life.

"Alright, apology accepted. Good day, gentleman." He said, dumping his tray and heading back to his office. The guys watched him go in silence.

"Wow, what do you think that was about? Do you think he and Amy had a fight?" Raj asked in confusion.

Howard thought he had an idea, but couldn't be sure.

"Well…Bernie brought Sheldon some pictures of our trip to Napa last year, and some from prom. There were a few in there that were extremely intimate of Sheldon and Amy."

Raj promptly spit out his vitamin water.

"What the hell? And you're just _now _telling me this?" He spat, mopping up the table.

Howard rolled his eyes. "No, it's not like _that_. The pictures were just very…sweet. I think Sheldon might have freaked out when he saw them. You know how he likes to think he is unaffected by Amy and his attraction to her. And we all know how he feels about public displays of affection."

Raj shook his head.

"All I know is, I love when my girlfriend shows me some PDA," Raj said wistfully.

Howard laughed gently at his best friend.

"Well…at least you have a _real_ girlfriend now. I was worried about you there, for a while, buddy. I mean…you were having fantasies about Siri."

Raj gave him a look of derision.

"Really, dude? _This_ from a guy that took imaginary baths with Katee Sackhoff?"

Howard snorted sheepishly, turning his attention to his lunch.

Sheldon returned to his office, drawing the blinds and shutting off the light. A hint of daylight still peeked in through the window, though, and those blasted wind chimes outside Professor Davenport's office were swinging in the breeze.

"Drat," he mumbled, his mood deteriorating further by the minute.

If he could only get 30 minutes of sleep, he'd be fine. Alex would be by later to finish the mornings work, and he wanted to be refreshed. He was thankful he had such an intelligent assistant. Perhaps in the coming months, he would give her more equations to help him figure out, so he could focus on his dark matter project. Locking his door, he retreated to the couch and laid down.

He'd never gotten back to sleep last night. He sat on the couch for hours, alternating between staring into space and staring at that picture.

So he looked like a lovelorn fool. So what? It meant nothing. The fact he lost sleep over it was ridiculous. Sheldon resolved that he would not be losing sleep again tonight. He wasn't some hippy! He was a man of Science. And these feelings had no place in his ordered world.

Sheldon huffed angrily. Now these blasted…_emotions_…were overtaking his working hours as well. He closed his eyes, forcing his brain to shut off. Yet as much as he tried, he couldn't. There was something that wouldn't refuse to let go of his thoughts. One thing that kept nagging at him.

How is Amy feeling today?

He told himself she was fine. She was a grown woman who simply had a sore throat. It was nothing serious. She had no business invading his thoughts like this over the sniffles. But he couldn't escape this feeling of overwhelming concern. She did look a bit pale last night when they arrived back to her place. And by the time he helped her to bed, her breathing was shallow. Amy had assured him she was fine. She wouldn't lie to him.

He tried to close his eyes, but the memory of her drooping eyes as he patted her head goodnight flashed through his mind. She barely responded, which was odd for Amy.

He turned sideways on the couch, but couldn't get comfortable. Five minutes morphed into ten, then ten into fifteen. Groaning, Sheldon sat up and threw one of the cushions across the room. He was never going to be able to shut off his mind.

"Son of a biscuit," He bemoaned, rising quickly. Retrieving his cell phone off of his desk, Sheldon hit speed dial for her number. It went straight to voicemail. He frowned, throwing his phone down and picking up the office landline. He hit speed dial for her lab. It rang three times before going to an automated message directing him to hit 0 for the Caltech operator. Pressing the 0 forcefully, he waited in irritation as the operator came on the line.

"Caltech University switchboard. How may I help you?"

"This is Dr. Cooper in the Physics Department. May I speak with Dr. Fowler in Neuroscience, please? I tried her extension but it goes to back to the switchboard."

The operator checked the line, noting it was inoperable and why.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Cooper. It seems Dr. Fowler is not in today. There is a message in the voicemail she had called out sick. Would you like to leave a message?"

Sheldon was alarmed. Amy called out sick, over a sore throat? That wasn't like her. He thought back to her state last night. She seemed a bit tired, but nothing a good night's sleep couldn't help. His anxiety began to mount as he realized due to his busy morning, he hadn't called her and she hadn't texted him as she normally did on her mid-morning break.

"Sir?"

Sheldon gulped, remembering the operator was still waiting for him.

"Umm…no message. Thank you," he said distractedly, hitting end on the call.

He began to pace his office like a madman, worrying scenarios playing themselves out in his head. Not only would he never get that nap now, but he wouldn't be able to go back to work, either.

He supposed he should go over to her apartment, and check on her. She was probably home, eating ice cream and lounging about, writing some more of that ludicrous fanfiction she thought he didn't know about. He felt a lick of indignation that she wouldn't answer her phone when she could clearly see it was him calling her. How could she be this selfish, making him worry when he had important work to do?

He sighed angrily. Well, it _was _his obligation as her boyfriend to ensure her well-being was intact.

Decision made, he gathered up his laptop and phone and packed them in his messenger bag. This was going to throw off his whole entire day. He would have to have a long talk with Amy about phone etiquette. Perhaps revise the relationship agreement to include penalties for such a blatant disregard for his precious time.

Sheldon stormed out of his office, slamming the door in his wake.

A/N – Show of hands…who wants to body slam Sheldon right now, and _NOT_ in a good way? I warned you…this is a necessary evil to the plot. I know some of you may hate him right now. But that's okay. His day of reckoning is coming.

Next Chapter: That storm I was telling you about? Time to batten down the hatches.


	7. Chapter 7

~Chapter 7~

A/N – Thank you to everyone for the amazing reviews. This chapter was difficult to write, from an Amy lover's POV. I can guarantee no one will like what this chapter holds. But I do have a plan. Do not fear. Happy thoughts. And remember: Out of chaos, brilliant stars are born –

BTW, my opening lyrics choice for this chapter, was purely by coincidence. I remembered it after I wrote the chapter. Have a listen to this song on Youtube. It is one of my favorites, is absolutely beautiful and fits this scene to a T. x Jo

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Feel the ground, it's slipping away like a sigh that greets the close of day. Feel the water's welcoming arms embrace me in their quiet calm. I can't hear what you say anymore, just the sound of trees on the ocean floor. Irresistibly drawn…from the shore. (I'm)…Drowning in your eyes I'm, floating out to sea. Helpless on the restless tide, that flows between you and me…" Ephraim Lewis – Drowning In Your Eyes

When Amy was younger, she had trouble falling asleep.

Due to her unusually high brain function, falling asleep at night was a chore. She would try to stay up for hours after her bedtime, devising ways to stave off slumber for as long as possible.

Reading by flashlight. Scribbling notes and ideas down into a journal. Talking to herself as though she were being interviewed by a prestigious paper. But sleep was always forced upon her. Her mother would tuck her in to her twin bed tightly, kissing her forehead and removing the glasses from her daughter's small face.

'_Careful with these, Amelia. Smart girls don't fall asleep with their glasses on_.' She would say sternly, putting the spectacles on her nightstand. This in turn blurred the world from her view and distorted everything. Her mother would shut off the light, blowing Amy another kiss, and then leave Amy to her darkened room.

The second the door would click, Amy would pull out the covers from the mattress, thus freeing her from the heavy restraints. She hated when her mother did that. What? Did she think she would roll out of bed at the age of 10?

She'd lay there for a long while, her eyes stubbornly refusing to close. There was so much to think about. So many ideas to jot down. So much to discover. Her mind was a gift she never took for granted. Sleep seemed like such a waste.

Another wasted concept to her, was fawning over the opposite sex. Most of the boys she knew were juvenile, ignorant, smelled funny, and never gave her a second glance. Besides…even if she had been interested in dating, a well arched brow from her mother would put the kibosh on that in a New York minute.

'_A good girl doesn't need to act like a tart, Amy dear. A boy won't buy the cow if he gets the milk for free.'_

By the time Amy was fourteen, she had a thick dossier of worldly wisdoms passed down by her mother to her. Not that it mattered; those jewels her mother pontificated about were wasted upon her.

While Amy's peers were tall, lithe, and had the kind of bone structure models kill for, Amy had been born blessed with brittle ankles. A low center of gravity. And myopia. Not too many boys in the neighborhood wanted to sample _her_ milk, anyway.

As the girls her age were swooning over the boys of bands like New Kids on the Block, she was stockpiling knowledge as a gatherer would food. There would be a time later for makeup, and boys, and giggling with besties over ice cream and glossy magazines. Now was the time to learn. To absorb. To excel. And she did. Oh, she did.

The problem was, when the day came she was ready to experience those superfluous things, time had marched on without her. She had no real friends to rely upon, or share things with. Science and Academia were her only friends. They comforted her and surrounded her with contentment.

Her love for learning had altered her in ways the general populous scorned. She was quick-witted, though too direct. Nobody liked a know it all. She was quirky, but her interests were considered weird. What fourteen year old plays the harp and reads Chaucer? And she was cute, but she had zero fashion sense – hiding behind masculine cardigans, stringy hair, and orthopedic shoes.

In short, she was what her peers considered a loser.

And they never let her forget it. On more than one occasion, she was the victim of cruel, malicious pranks. It shouldn't have been that way; so they didn't like her. Why not simply ignore her? Why go out of their way to harm or humiliate her; what was the point of that?

It took her a long time to accept that they did it because they _liked_ it. Plain and simple. People could be cruel and merciless. So she built a wall around her heart, never allowing anyone to penetrate it.

Though she secretly wished for the companionship of those blond, blue eyed waifs, something deep inside of her told her she was on a different wavelength than them. Trusting them was a risk. She had learned her lessons the hard way. It would take her years to find the kind of fellowship she would ultimately find. Thanks in part to the chance meeting in a coffee shop and the promise of the use of a George Foreman grill.

Her life had changed irrevocably since that day. There was no going back. She could never have guessed how becoming one half of a whole with Sheldon, would give her an even larger social circle. How could she have known, that he had so many good friends, and in turn, they had significant others who would accept her. Support her. Love her.

She often feared over the years that it was only Sheldon that bound her to this group. If she and Sheldon parted ways, would the others even bother with her? She _had_ to hold on to the truth they would. Or else, her heart would splinter into a million tiny shards of glass. They didn't just tolerate her because she was Sheldon's girlfriend, right? While it was true in the beginning, four years had gone by. Surely, they cared for Amy, the _person,_ now… and not just out of obligation?

Penny and Bernadette weren't always supportive. They had, in the past, teased her and mocked her about not only her style, but her slow moving relationship with Sheldon. But she knew deep inside, they cared for her and would be there if she needed them.

They teased her relentlessly about that fanfiction during girl's night. In the end, though…it was fine. They really seemed to enjoy her little tale of Amelia and Cooper. It made her smile to know she shared something so personal with them, and wasn't judged or ridiculed. Not only that, they encouraged her.

Lying in bed that night, she smiled in the darkness at how they were on the edge of their seat, waiting to know what happened in the end. This was what besties did; except there was no makeup, and the ice cream had been a more adult libation called wine. But still…

In the deepest recesses of her heart, she allowed her dreams to flourish of a physical relationship with her boyfriend.

Sheldon was handsome, no doubt about that. But it was more than his boyish face, tall, muscular body, and underplayed charm. It was his sexual innocence that intrigued her. She too was inexperienced in the ways of Eros. That they would be learning all of this together titillated her. She needed an outlet for her ever growing attraction to him. He wasn't ready. She accepted that. They were in this holding pattern that sometimes had her turning back to her childhood passion of writing. What could it hurt, spending out her desires on paper?

She often found herself in the midst of dreams about him; touching her. Kissing her. Bringing her to rapture. She'd feel guilty and spent afterwards, but it didn't matter. She couldn't help the attraction he'd wrought from her.

Last night was just another example. She dreamt of Sheldon all night; his wounded eyes and soft lips imploring her to believe him. Understand him. Accept him as he was. Quirks and all. He was so imperfect, her perfect man. And he may never see her side of the coin. She knew he loved her. But would that always be enough? Actions spoke louder than words in Amy's mind. She was a Scientist. She could only believe in cold facts. Her heart was too full of him. He would be the death of her someday, she was certain.

She had been so incredibly sad last night, when he left. She was hoping he would kiss her goodbye, but no such luck. She couldn't fault him; his mysophobia was as big a part of him as anything. She knew and understood his fears. Yet she longed for his kiss as the sky longed for the Sun to warm it.

He left her, leaving her cold and alone. She spend the entire night tossing fitfully, her mind hazy and her body restless. Why couldn't she relax? She was exhausted.

Something roused her. A noise next door perhaps. Or a car backfiring outside. She carefully sat up, trying to gather her bearings. Her head was pounding, her throat on fire, her lungs constricted.

Amy blinked rapidly as she tried to focus. Her brain was normally as sharp as a surgeon's honed blade. Her first indication that something was terribly wrong, was that she couldn't remember what day it was. She remembered last night was date night, but what night was that again?

She had slept until after ten this morning, spending the next two hours laying there staring at the television which was on mute. She was starving, yet had absolutely no saliva in her mouth to chew. The effort was simply too much for her. Her mouth was so dry she could hardly swallow.

She thought about going to heat up some soup, but couldn't muster an ounce of energy. Reaching over, she grabbed some Tylenol and downed it with the warm water on her bedside table. Her head was swimming. She hadn't eaten since dinner last night, and that was at least 15 hours ago.

That burning sensation which began to take root in her throat the day before yesterday had morphed into a full on inferno. Her lungs ached each time she tried to draw a breath. She was sweating like she was in the Congo, yet felt achingly cold.

She couldn't remember the last time she felt this terrible. She couldn't remember much of anything, in fact. Her thoughts were a hazy pattern of images and sounds. Her limbs felt hundreds of pounds and her eyes scratchy.

She was lucky she had the presence of mind to call out sick earlier that morning. Even that was extremely difficult. She could only manage a text to the University Human Resources Dept. at the crack of dawn.

Part of her was frightened that she needed real help, yet she didn't have the heart nor the energy to call anyone. She thought of Penny, but she was no doubt in conference with Dr.'s all day. There was no way she could bother Sheldon with this; he was stressed enough about his job without having to deal with her cold. Her mother was in Bakersfield for the week visiting her sister, so that was out as well.

Exhausted and out of breath, the most she could do was fall back into a fitful sleep, dreaming of crashing waves and sunsets.

She awoke later on feeling dizzy and disoriented. What time was it? The room was bright with shadows fading in and out through the blinds, casting patterns on the floor. A fleeting thought shuffled through her mind; lying in bed as a child at night, watching the headlights from passing cars lighting up her room for a second. They cast similar shadows as the light did now. Amy felt her eyes drooping as she tried to remember.

She was so incredibly thirsty. She was dying for a drink, and knew she had to walk to the kitchen to get one. She stood up on wobbly legs to make her way, but the short trek wore her out and had her clutching the couch for support. Halfway there, the room began to spin in front of her.

_Are you sure this is just a sore throat, Dr. Fowler_? Her feeble mind supplied.

What was the matter with her that she couldn't even take care of herself? She was a world renowned Neuroscientist. And she was not even able to make it to the kitchen for…

_For what?_

Suddenly, she couldn't remember where she was going, or for what reason. Her hands began to tremble, and dots swam in front of her already blurred vision. She swallowed thickly, but the fire in her throat was too painful and she began to cough uncontrollably.

Amy began to cry. Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong.

_I have to make it back to my room. Where is my cell phone? I have to call for help. Please, help me._

She staggered back the way she came, gripping the doorframe to her room. Her bleary eyes scanned the room until they found her dresser. She forget to put her glasses on, so she couldn't see that far. Walking over slowly, she let out a frustrated gasp. Her phone wasn't upon it.

"Dammit," she choked out, beginning to panic. Was it on her bedside table? She paced over, only to find it, too, was empty.

_Where was the damn phone?_

It was in the bathroom. She had left it on the counter last night. That's where it was.

Amy took a shallow breath, unable to exhale it completely. The room began to spin once again, this time moving even faster and faster than before.

_I can do this. I can do this. One foot in front of the other. Keep calm, Fowler. One foot in front of the other. _

They say it only takes a second for your life to change.

Stumbling on the carpet, she didn't see the shoes she wore last night by the side of the bed. Her foot got caught in the heel, sending her flying across the room.

In her haste last night to dress for date night, Amy had left her lingerie drawer open. As she came down hard from her fall, her forehead made contact with the sharp edge of the drawer, knocking her unconscious immediately.

Time was meaningless. It might have been hours, or days, since she remembered anything. Felt anything.

As if in a dream, she felt cold water splashing her in the face. If that wasn't bad enough, the cold water began to trickle down her bare body, seeping into her bones and making her shiver uncontrollably.

_Bare_ body? When did she get naked? How did she get here? _Where_ was here, anyway?

Something soft and gentle caressed her face, pushing her wet hair out of her eyes. She began to shake harder from the freezing water. Where was she? Had she wandered into the Antarctic exhibit at the San Diego Zoo?

She couldn't focus on anything. She tried to stand, but her feet gave way underneath her. Was she floating on air? She was lying down now. How did that happen? Something hard was beneath her. A raft, maybe? Had she drifted out to sea? The freezing water pelted her, blinding her. She was so cold.

Tears began to form in her eyes. She tried to take a deep breath, but it was impossible.

'_I can't breathe…_'

Panic seized her as she couldn't get oxygen into her lungs. She was on fire, her body aching as the flames swallowed her. Yet the cold water felt like millions of needles going through her skin. All she wanted to do was go to sleep. Why couldn't she go to sleep? Her head ached, pounding against the onslaught of light, sound, and touch.

'_Oh, god…I'm dying'_, she thought incoherently. She tried to stand again, but strong arms held her tight.

_Arms?_

She was a Neuroscientist. She knew that the brain played tricks on you during times of trauma. It was the cerebral cortex's way of protecting itself.

What was happening to her? Sobs began to bubble out of her. She sifted through her memory, trying to find the medical jargon to give her help. She flailed her arms about, trying to grab onto something. She couldn't gain purchase on anything. Everything was slippery. Everything was wet. Something was holding her tightly, anchoring her down.

Why was her vast knowledge of Science and medicine failing her? She had devoted her life to Science, and now, it had let her down. What good was Science when you were alone, empty, and helpless?

'_Who am I? Oh, god…I can't remember my name'…_

She shifted through her databanks, terror stricken, unable to remember the slightest detail about her life. It was like she had never existed at all.

Suddenly, one word forced its way through the haze and murk she found herself immersed in. She knew somewhere in her mind that it would keep her safe.

"Sheldon."

Sinking into the cushion of the raft beneath her, Amy drifted off to sea. She had no fight left in her. Hopefully they would find her before the raft overturned or tossed her into oblivion.

She couldn't hear the soft voice in her ear whispering…

"…_I'm here..."_

She saw shadows of dark and light.

Lights shining in her eyes.

She heard words, too. Murmurings which were muffled. Words that should have been like second nature to her. But these words meant nothing. Especially uttered by strange voices she had never heard before.

Seizure

Head trauma

Respiratory distress

Severe dehydration

Lactated ringers

Pneumonia

CPR

Crash cart

She felt things, as well. As though she were standing above her body, looking down at herself. It didn't feel real. Nothing felt real.

A tourniquet on her arm.

Something tense being pulled across her forehead.

A pinprick.

Another pinprick.

Strong hands pressing on her diaphragm. Something plastic being put in her mouth.

Then, later, who knew how long… something cold tightly gripping her hand. Something soft and warm pressing against her temple. Something wet dripping down her face, sliding onto her lips. It was salty.

Curious.

Sea water, perhaps? Had she fallen off her raft into the ocean after all? What time was it, anyway? Had she made it to the shore? So many questions…It was bright here. Too bright. Whiteness everywhere.

Something was warm by her ear, whispering quiet sounds to her. She could not make them out. She strained to hear, but the oceans roar was too loud.

'_Don't leave me'_.

That was strange. Where would she go?

Her body was being dragged over coral and seaweed and stinging water. It hurt. Dear God, it hurt. Because she knew that she was drifting further and further away from who she was. Who she had been. Who she was going to become.

'_Help me'_, she moaned in the darkness, trying and failing to open her eyes. She tried to remember anything about herself. Anything at all.

She heard the words of Chaucer in her head, but she couldn't comprehend their meaning. They were beautiful, though, and she feared she would never hear such words again.

'_This thing that has happened to you is for your instruction and your profit. Let's see! Do you dare to look yet? Be fully assured, I tell you plainly, I am your friend…'_

That voice…I know _that_ voice. I hear that voice in my dreams…

'_Come back'_, she cried helplessly as the words and the voice speaking them flew through the air, out of her reach, destination unknown.

Pushing through the water, her limbs as heavy as concrete, she tried to gain ground. It was impossible as the heaviness in her chest weighed her down. She was drowning.

She saw snippets of things she didn't understand. Heard voices whispering words that were a foreign language. The fear gave way to acceptance. She felt calm. It was strange; only moments ago she was terrified. Where was this strange place?

The color blue flashed before her whitewashed vision.

Blue…Deep as the ocean. So deep. She was drowning in that color. She was drowning.

Drowning…

Above her…below her…behind her…in front of her…

It hit her. It was so simple. So clear. So clean.

Eyes.

A baby's eyes. A toddler's eyes. A child's eyes. A man's eyes.

_Her_ man's eyes.

She tried to hold onto them, her gaze faltering as the blue was being pulled away from her, to be replaced with black.

Further.

Further.

No…Focus on those eyes. Don't look at the other thing. Turn away from it. Close your eyes. Blue. Focus on the blue.

Cornflower blue. Azure blue. Indigo blue. Navy blue. Sapphire blue. Lapis blue. Cerulean blue. Sheldon's blue. Sheldon's blue. Sheldon…

That was his name. Sheldon...

'_I kiss you back. On the lips…I remove your armor…what do you do?'_

Sheldon…

'_I deserve romance. And I didn't know how else to make it happen.'_

Sheldon…

'_Sometimes…I can't help but want more.'_

Sheldon.

'_I'm always hoping.'_

Hope is the thing with feathers…that perches in the soul…

_She was standing on another shore, a distant shore…many miles from here. Graduation day from Harvard University. Valedictorian. Summa cum laude. Nantasket beach…late spring. She was alone. Always alone. Cap and gown still on, diploma in the front seat of her car. No shoes. No tights. Staring at the Atlantic. UCLA bound. PhD. Clutching a bottle. A small vintage bottle she found while vacationing on Cape Cod. It held a note. She felt foolish. She threw it across the expanse, watching as the waves took it. Tumbling. Tumbling. Gone. She smiled sadly. One part of her life, over. Another chapter to begin. Pasadena beckoned. Or perhaps Glendale. Would it be the same? No friends. No lover. No hope? She had brains. She knew brains. Brains held the key to the universe. Brains couldn't hold your hand, though. Would she ever find someone like her? Too smart for her own good…too involved with Science…too much a cynic? Probably not. She was a rarity. One of a kind. A freak. Was anyone here going to miss her? Was anyone anywhere going to? _

_She stared at the water. _

_Blue…so blue. Blue was her favorite color. Would she ever again see a blue as lovely as this? A blue that filled her heart, soothed her soul, seeping in and covering her in its splendor?_

_She doubted it._


	8. Chapter 8

~Chapter 8~

A/N – I am amazed and humbled by the reviews and support for this story. They make me smile. I do this for you.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…And I...Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed. And I...take back all the things I said to make you feel like that. And I...Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed. And I... take back all the things that I said to you…" Linkin Park – My December

Sheldon was folded into an uncomfortable chair at Amy's bedside. His head rested on her abdomen, as he clutched her hand tightly in his own. His eyes watched their clasped hands intently.

No movement. Her hand was ice cold and limp in his grip.

He slid his head sideways, watching her face. The respirator doing the breathing for her made her chest cavity rise and fall unnaturally. He stared at her, unblinking, unable to believe what his eyes were telling his brain.

Amy had a breathing tube down her throat, an IV connected to her left arm which had four different piggyback lines, and a tensor bandage across her forehead where ten stitches were hidden beneath. She hadn't stirred in over six hours.

An image flashed through his memory then; Amy dressed as Snow White lying across his couch, her shoes settled upon his spot as she lay still as a statue.

'_Sheldon…all Snow White needs is one little kiss to wake up…'_

His eyes drifted shut. The monitor beside her bedside beeped steadily, rattling his nerves.

'_Heard you the first time…'_

Had he? Had he really?

Movement and noise outside caught his eyes and ears, as a nurse and a Dr. walked by the room discussing a chart. Amy's chart, it seemed, as the older man and the younger woman spoke in hushed tones. They spared a glance into the room, their somber expressions meeting Sheldon's before continuing down the hall.

The only sounds in the ICU were the beeping of monitors and the whoosh of compression cuffs. His tired eyes drifted back to the digital display, anguish threatening to smother him.

Sheldon was a Physicist, not a medical doctor. But even he could tell the vitals on the screen weren't where they should be. Her blood oxygen level was at 90% which signaled hypoxemia. Her blood pressure was dangerously low at 85/60 – and her pulse rate was 35.

She was so pale, lying so still. His dynamic little lady, normally so full of life, looked like a shell of the woman he loved. How did he not see this coming?

How did he not recognize the warning signs last night: The way she barely spoke? Her strange behavior with wanting to walk on the beach barefooted? The way she could hardly eat, drink, or talk? Her desperation in needing to know the truth of his feelings, as though she would never again get the chance to find out.

Had she known how sick she really was? Was her body telling her something that her mind could not comprehend?

Once again, he'd failed her.

He didn't apologize for his actions in the past with her fears about being too close with Penny. Instead, he hid behind his inability to open up to her. He didn't kiss her goodnight when she obviously needed it. Instead, he held firm to his rules about germs. He didn't stay with her, nursing her, preventing this from happening. She was all alone today. Probably frightened and helpless. All because he needed to run home, hide from the truth of what he was feeling. And blame her for it.

The guilt he felt was overwhelming. Sheldon closed his eyes, not able to look at her another minute.

Oh, god…why her? She is blameless. Remarkable. If anyone on this planet deserved to live…to be happy, it was his Amy.

He felt disconnected from his body. Like he was floating above the clouds without a tether to the ground like a helium balloon.

'_Helium is the second most abundant element in the universe. Helium is so light that Earth's gravity is not strong enough to hold on to it. When helium atoms are released into the atmosphere, they rise until they escape into space.' _

Forcing his eyes to remain shut, he saw white light flash all around him. Cold, unforgiving light. Was this was eternity looked like? Was that what it was like, on the other side? Could…

Could Amy see this light, wherever she was now…caught between this plane and the next?

His mind wandered to Arthur. Was where he was…Heaven? Did the light ever stop? Or did it shine everywhere, blinding you and making you want to _embrace_ the darkness, to attain some peace?

'_You'll know what to do when the time is r-right, Sheldon. When that time comes, you must be strong. Put aside these childish whims and do what is required.'_

A harsh sob escaped Sheldon's throat. Oh, God…Arthur. _Why?_ Why didn't you tell me that _this _was what was coming? Why didn't you prepare me? How could you throw me off the edge of the world without a parachute?

Why?

Even as the plea passed his through his mind, it was moot. Sheldon's spine stiffened as his own voice echoed in the darkness.

_Because you are a selfish bastard. That's why. Because you have taken for granted everything, your whole life. Your intelligence. The people who put up with you, the people who love you…Arthur told you last year to appreciate them. And what do you do? You give your best friend an ultimatum: your fiancé or him. You tell the woman who loves you that she is the syrup, and you don't want the deluxe syrup. You want the mediocre powder. You scream in her face, slam her front door, and run away on a train. You have no right to ask why. The time for asking why is over. You deserve no absolution. Now, you know what the cost is. Now, you will reap the whirlwind._

Angrily, Sheldon swiped away the tears that were racing down his face. There was no place here for tears anymore. He never understood the expression, self – loathing. He could never imagine not loving himself entirely. After all, he was his own favorite person. But In this moment, he had never felt hatred as cleanly, as perfectly…as he felt it toward himself.

He had left Caltech 8 hours ago, fully intending to check in on Amy and then go home for a nap. He was sure she was fine; perhaps playing hooky and lounging on her sofa in her pajama's watching some chick flick on TV. He knocked his customary three times, to no answer. Her car was downstairs, and he knew she was in there. He tried again, calling her name louder. Nothing.

This was madness.

Growing more agitated, he pounded on her door. What the hell was she doing in there? This was bordering on rude, now. He would certainly read her the riot act when he finally saw her.

He pulled out his keys, quickly locating hers on his key ring. There was nothing to be done; he would have to risk her wrath by entering her apartment unannounced. Turning the key and slowly opening the door, Sheldon noted immediately that his earlier thoughts were off the mark. She wasn't on the couch watching TV. In fact, no sound could be heard in the apartment. He put his messenger bag down on the chair by the door, shutting it.

"Amy?" He called out, in case she was undressed. No answer. Was she in the bathroom? Sheldon passed by the small room, noting the door was open and the light off. Sheldon frowned, his legs moving his body the short distance toward her bedroom. The door was open, the room quiet, but her TV was on, muted. His uneasiness grew.

"Amy?" He called again, quieter this time. But the previous ire was missing from his voice. Only silence greeted him. He stepped further into the room, spying her body on the floor by her dresser. He stared at her for a moment, the connection between brain and legs not working.

'_An odd place for a nap'_, his muddled brain supplied, cocking his head to the side to watch her. His eyes blinked lazily, unwilling to see what they knew they were seeing. He was in shock, and he didn't even realize it.

"Amy?"

She didn't answer. But he could hear a low hum coming from her. Coming closer, he bent down to her. Her face was turned away from him, her chestnut hair spread around her like a halo. There was an eerie wheezing coming from deep within her lungs. His eyes widened. Gripping her shoulders, he turned her over.

Blood.

There was blood everywhere.

On her face. On the carpet. On the bodice of her nightgown.

She was pale as milk, her lips a pallid shade of grey.

"Amy?" He screamed, his voice frantic. She was completely unresponsive. Sheldon sat back, dragging her body across his on the bed. There was a deep gash across her forehead that was still bleeding.

"Oh, God. No," He screeched, reaching out to put his palm against her forehead to try and stop the bleeding. Fear like he'd never known shot through his body like a rocket. Amy was sweating profusely and burning with fever.

"Dear Lord," he yelled, forgetting decorum and pulling her limp body further across his lap. She was soaked; her hair plastered to her face and neck with blood and sweat. He shook her body gently, trying desperately to rouse her.

"Amy, please answer me. It's Sheldon," he tried, but she made no move.

Sheldon's panic was turning into hysteria. The claret swarmed in front of his eyes, making him want to faint. He could feel the blood leaving his limbs, his entire world narrowing down to a hole the size of a pin.

_Do not pass out, Cooper! Do you hear me!_

He tried to remember what to do. He gently took his thumbs and tried to open Amy's eyes. The emerald orbs beneath her drowsy lids stared back at him without acknowledgement, before rolling back into their sockets.

He didn't think he could feel more fearful than in this moment. He was wrong.

Suddenly, Amy began to convulse in his arms, her arms and legs shaking violently. Her head jerked back and forth, a slight puddle of drool escaping her lips.

"Fuck," he screamed, the expletive coming out high pitched and frantic and so foreign from his mouth. He had never uttered such a vulgarity in his life.

"Amy, don't do this. Don't do this! Please," he begged, dragging her off the bed and pulling her roughly into his arms while he stumbled to the shower. He had to get her body temperature down before she had a stroke. He had to stop the bleeding in her head. He had to move.

_Move, damn you!_

He clumsily held her while turning the shower head on full blast cold, all thoughts fleeing his mind as he yanked her soaking wet nightgown over her head. The fact she was naked beneath it save for panties registered in his head, but he completely ignored it. She could have been a mannequin for all he knew. The only thought that was front and center in his mind was save her. Help her. Keep her with you.

The water was freezing. He winced as he stepped in behind her, securing her body to his chest as he aimed the spigot directly on her. It was so cold, he yelled out himself as it hit him indirectly. Was this the right thing to do? Was he making her condition worse? God…he was a genius who read and retained everything. Where the hell were the answers? Didn't they pack you in ice when you had a fever back in the old days?

He stroked her face, her neck, trying to rouse her again. He called her name, to no avail. Suddenly, she began to move as though weighed down by lead. He gently tried to pry her mouth open, by turning her head sideways. Her tongue rolled back and he was terrified she would choke to death.

"Amy, can you hear me?" He shouted, but her only answer was to try to pull away and step out of the shower. Scared she would hurt herself or send them both crashing to the shower floor, Sheldon grasped her around the waist and lowered the both of them gently, the water still pelting them from above. She gurgled and wheezed, trying to breath.

Sheldon was shaking from the water temperature and from fear. He had to call 911. Oh, Jesus…why didn't he do that first thing? She shivered and began to sob, the effort of doing so exhausting her further. He tightened his arms around her, trying to soothe her, but in her delirium he couldn't be sure it had any effect. He closed his eyes, trying to calculate a plan of action. His cell phone was in his messenger bag by the door.

Dammit.

Looking around the bathroom, he spotted Amy's cell phone on the counter by the sink. He let out a gasp of relief, reaching up and around her with one hand and grasping the phone. Not even bothering to dial, he hit the Siri feature and shouted 911 when Siri answered.

"911 what is your emergency?"

Sheldon sobbed. "I'm Dr. Sheldon Cooper. My girlfriend Dr. Amy Fowler is experiencing a seizure brought on by high fever. She has a head wound and is convulsing. We need an ambulance immediately. Please," He shouted frantically, holding the phone as tightly as he could to his ear. His hands were shaking badly, and he tried not to drop the phone in the water as he clutched Amy with the other arm.

"What is your address?

After rattling off the address and begging them to hurry, Sheldon dropped the phone to the floor outside the shower. Amy began to wheeze louder, not making sense with her disjointed words and moans. He felt his heart constrict at her pain. Suddenly she turned toward him, and in a moment of lucidity, mumbled his name. He scanned her face, certain he imagined it.

"I'm here," he rasped, holding her as tightly as he could. His fear and anguish grew as Amy's breathing worsened. "Please, Amy…hold on. I can't…I can't do this alone. Please." He choked, praying this was all a nightmare. He'd gladly endure it, if he could wake up later and Amy was asleep in her bed, safe and sound.

Sheldon lay there in the shower with her, tightly putting pressure on her wound with one hand and holding her close to him with the other. Her body was shaking violently when the paramedics found them, after they pounded on the door and Sheldon frantically screamed, "In here".

He had thrown a towel that was on the towel rack over her naked body for her modesty, and when the paramedics entered the bathroom he was grateful one of them was a woman. She viewed the scene as the male paramedic unfurled his equipment with rapid and precise moves. Her eyes met Sheldon's, and she could see the terror apparent in them.

"What happened, sir?" She asked professionally, and Sheldon opened his mouth to speak with great difficulty.

"I…she…I came over to check on her. She was sick last night after our date. I left…work and found her like this. She wasn't responding to me. She's…she's bleeding. Oh, God. Bleeding everywhere. And she was burning up. Her eyes…her eyes were rolling in her head. I put her here," he said, his teeth chattering.

The female paramedic nodded, stepping into the shower and shutting the spigot before attempting to lift Amy off of him. He wouldn't let go of her, and she gently nudged him.

"Sir, I have her. You can let go. Let me take her so we can help her."

Sheldon shook his head, his hands trying to let her go as she asked. But the fear and shock wouldn't allow him do it.

"I…I can't…." He sobbed, fearing if he let her go then the thread which bound them together would be snapped. He needed to hold onto her.

The paramedic gave him a look of sympathy. "It's alright, Sir. Let me help you. Please."

Sheldon nodded, his entire body shuddering with the effort. The EMT pried his frozen fingers from Amy's flesh, and Sheldon instantly felt bereft. She laid Amy out on her bathroom rug, and immediately they began to assess her. The male paramedic spoke into his CB radio in a brisk tone.

"We have a female, approximately 30-34 years of age. Bleeding head wound on the occipitofrontal bone. Probable grand mal seizure. We are starting her on lactated ringers. Severe dehydration, respiratory distress. Possible pneumonia. Wheezing and rales present in the lungs. Pulse is 40, BP 85/60, oxygen saturation is 88. Have crash cart ready at hospital, eta approximately 15 minutes. Patient not breathing. Beginning CPR. Over.

Sheldon's eyes widened in shock, as he woodenly stood up on unsteady legs.

_CPR?_

He had been so confused and frightened, the thought never occurred to him to check to see if she was _breathing_? Dear God, what had he done?

"What do you mean, CPR?" He shrieked, his feet unsteady as he slid on the wet floor and landed in a heap. The female EMT began to clear Amy's airway as the male EMT started chest compressions.

"Sir, your friend-…" She began gently, but she was cut off by Sheldon.

"She is my girlfriend," he interrupted, anger in his voice.

"Alright, Sir. Your girlfriend has stopped breathing. She is not oxygenating enough as her arterial blood gasses are dangerously low. Please, step outside while we help her."

Sheldon's stomach dropped into the vicinity of his toes.

Jesus Christ…she had a sore throat last night.

He couldn't think, couldn't move. Certainly couldn't stand up and leave her. He crawled to Amy's side, trying not to get in the way, and whispered into her ear.

"Please, don't leave me," he said forlornly. The female EMT looked up and tried to be patient with him. He seemed about to collapse under the weight of this stress. Part of her training was to assist the loved ones of victims during their triage. One look at this man and she knew, he loved this woman.

"Sir, what is your name?" She asked gently as the male EMT did compressions. Sheldon watched Amy's still body and couldn't feel his hands or feet. He was numb all over.

"Sir?" She prompted again. Sheldon looked at her through glassy eyes.

"S-Sheldon. Cooper. Dr. Sheldon Cooper," he sputtered, his eyes unfocused.

"One- One- Thousand… Two- One- Thousand," the EMT said, turning her eyes once again to Sheldon.

"Sheldon, my name is Vivian. We are doing everything for…"

"Amy," Sheldon said brokenly. "Her name is Amy."

Vivian shook her head, eyeing Sheldon with pity.

"I promise we will do everything we can for Amy. Please, step into the bedroom and wait for us. I will come get you as soon as we stabilize her. Can you do that for me, Sheldon? Please?"

With no other choice, Sheldon did as he was told. Rising on rubbery legs, he stumbled into Amy's bedroom. He felt paralyzed. He didn't know how he made it to Amy's bed, but he found himself on the floor next to it, clutching her comforter that had fallen to the floor tightly. His stared at the blood that lay in a thick pool by her dresser, feeling like he was going to vomit.

He could hear the paramedics talking back and forth, could hear their dispatch operator giving them instructions, could hear the thundering of his heartbeat and the blood rushing in his ears.

He rocked himself back and forth, his mind shutting down.

"Make this stop. Make this stop," he repeated on a loop, not knowing to whom he was begging or if his pleas would be answered. Hot tears began to fall down his face, mingling with the freezing cold water from Amy's shower.

"This isn't real. It can't be real. We were walking on the beach last night," he whispered to himself, the rocking becoming faster and faster. "We're in a good place. A good place." He chanted helplessly.

The Paramedics soon emerged into the hall, carrying Amy on a stretcher. She looked deathly white. Sheldon gasped as he saw the various IV lines they inserted leading out of her arms. Vivian came in to retrieve him.

"Sheldon?"

He jumped up, his heart beating dangerously fast.

"What's happening?" He managed, tears choking his throat.

"We have her stabilized. She started breathing again, but we have to get her to the hospital as soon as possible. She needs a full neural scan to ensure no brain damage occurred due to the seizure and her head trauma. I assume you want to join her?" She asked, moving the stretcher through the living room.

Sheldon had already raced past her, grabbing Amy's purse and his bag and opening the door so they could bring her through it. A crowd had gathered by the doorway; neighbors no doubt curious as to what was happening. He slammed her door shut, ignoring the fact his clothes were covered in her blood and he was soaking wet and shaking.

They waited for the elevator, Sheldon taking her hand gently in his own. She was freezing and Sheldon let out a loud sob. He didn't care who saw his breakdown. He felt helpless. Leaning down, he kissed Amy's temple gently. His tears began to fall onto her face, and he whispered words of sorrow she probably couldn't hear.

The ride to Pasadena General was a blur. He couldn't stop talking to Amy, trying to hold onto her any way he could. He recited Chaucer's 'The House of Fame" to her, desperate to make some connection. He felt on the edge of his sanity. Vivian sat beside him, tending to Amy and trying not to intrude on the private moment.

Six hours later, Amy was stable but not out of danger.

She had suffered a grand mal seizure due to her high fever, made worse by the concussion she suffered when she banged her forehead. Furthermore, the attending physician who examined her said Amy had double pneumonia. Her lungs were full of fluid and she needed to be on a respirator.

Self- loathing tore at Sheldon. He couldn't believe that he was actually annoyed at Amy for being sick earlier. He was annoyed that worry for her was tugging at him. And he was annoyed at her for calling out sick, doing what he thought was playing hooky and ruining his day of research.

The tears wouldn't stop falling. They kept coming, and coming, burning his face and clogging his throat. What the hell was wrong with him? How could he be so callous? Oh, it was easy. He had years of practice. He never thought of anyone but himself. Thank heavens a power bigger than himself had urged him today to leave work and go to her. How could he have not realized she needed CPR? He was a genius, for Christ sake.

He was exhausted. The last two days had been fraught with emotional strain. He was ready to drop.

She almost died. And she could have, thanks to him and his ineptitude. He could have lost her. He quite easily could be in the morgue with her right now, instead of in this room.

Sheldon's breathing began to accelerate as the thought took root. If he hadn't arrived, if he hadn't called 911…his Amy would be dead.

'_Lucky for you, because I wished you were dead'_

'_I was aiming for you heart'_

'_Honestly, if I have to endure a long and tedious evening, I'd rather be here with you on date night'_

'_I hope you are as happy together as I've always been alone with myself'_

'_We're good here, Gollum'_

'_Now let's find her a gift that makes her feel small and worthless'_

'_I should hope so…I don't see anyone else banging on this door to put up with your nonsense.'_

His eidetic memory, his perfect and beautiful mind served him well now. Every snide remark, every sarcastic quip. Every time he hurt, belittled, or dismissed her… was coming back to haunt him in blaring living color.

Oh, God…had he really said those words before even in jest? Had he actually said words so hateful? So spiteful? So _heinous_? To and about the one person who meant everything to him?

His Pop Pop would be so disappointed in him. His Meemaw would be so ashamed of him.

Sheldon stood up, walking in circles around Amy's small hospital room. He felt a panic attack swiftly coming on. He couldn't breathe. The walls were closing in on him. She was everywhere, all around him. Her pale skin. Her unresponsive eyes. Grey lips. Shaking arms and legs. Monitors and needles and noises and wheezing. The fearful way she called his name. The way she lay lifeless in his arms. The blood, her blood…all over him. The way she stopped breathing.

The way she fucking _stopped breathing_.

The room began to spin. The sickening feeling reminded him of when George Jr. would drag him on the tilt-a-whirl with him at the Texas State Fair. Sheldon would beg and cry, kicking and screaming not to go on that blasted deathtrap. George would roll his eyes and laugh, teasing Sheldon what a baby he was being.

_Man up, Shelly. Everyone is watching you. _

_Man up, Shelly, the Universe is watching you. _

Helplessness. No. Make it stop. Please. Don't. I can't. Too much. Let me go. I'm sorry. So sorry…

Always holding her at bay, always pushing her away, always treating her like she didn't really matter.

Her words, in contrast, were always so benign. Sweet. Supportive. Hopeful.

'_Hey Cuddles'_

'_Kiss me where I've never been kissed'_

'_I'm just saying, second base is right there'_

'_You're like a sexy toddler'_

'_Are we ever going to have an intimate relationship?'_

'_We're playing Dr. - Star Trek Style'_

'_That was nice'_

'_I'm Amy Farrah Fowler, you're Sheldon Cooper'_

'_I'm a Princess and this is my tiara'_

'_Sheldon, you look so handsome'_

'_I'm always hoping'…._

"Good…Lord," he croaked, sitting down and putting his head between his legs. This was bad. Very bad. If he had taken that nap in his office, if he didn't get on that bus and go to her. If…if…if…

He could have lost her. Amy could have died, taking away…everything.

My Amy…my precious vixen. The only woman who has ever wanted me. The _real_ me. The one everyone despises. She understood. She loved me.

'_Maybe give her a piece of that heart beating in your chest. You won't regret it…'_

"Oh, God. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean any of it. Please," he moaned, the room getting smaller and smaller.

_You'd have your way then, Cooper. No distractions. No emotional ties. Problem solved. It's what you've wanted all along. To be alone. To devote your entire being to Physics. No Amy Farrah Fowler to worry about. No nagging about intimacy, trust, and love. All gone. _

"Stop it," he whispered shakily, feeling his lungs constrict. "This is not happening. This is not happening," He repeated, over and over.

_Oh, but it was happening._

_Every word, every look, every thought, every gesture, every touch, every feeling, every plea, every hope, every smile, every tear, every kiss, every fear…. Crushed under the weight of your arrogance and your delusions of grandeur. _

'_I wish you would trust me…'_

"Stop."

'_May I offer you a consoling hug?'_

"Please…stop.

'_I did everything just the way you like it.'_

He needed help. He was falling apart. He didn't deserve comfort, but he needed it. He felt he would perish with grief.

He stumbled over to where his messenger bag lay, grabbing his phone and watching in helplessness as it fell from his shaking hands and skittered across the floor. He bent to retrieve it, and punched in the number.

He was panting as he waited for the call to answer, his chest aching. Oh, God…what had he done to her? He was a monster.

The line went live, and Sheldon gasped in relief and shame.

"Leonard, please…I need you." He begged, falling in a heap on the floor.

A/N – I promised you angst. I hope I've delivered. I will be busy with Pharmacy seminars all week, so next update by Friday. x


	9. Chapter 9

~Chapter 9~

A/N – Thank you for the lovely reviews for last Chapter. It was a bit of an angst fest, no?

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…One of these days the sky's gonna break and everything will escape and I'll know…One of these days the mountains are gonna fall into the sea…and they'll know. That you and I were made for this. I was made to taste your kiss. We were made to never fall away…Never fall away…" Civil Twilight – Letters from the Sky

Leonard and Penny were dozing on the couch when Leonard's cell went off. She gripped him around the waist tighter, trying to keep him from getting up to retrieve it.

"Let it go to voicemail, Sweetie. It's probably Howard or Raj trying to persuade you to do Vintage game night after all." Penny said, grimacing. She wanted one night with her man that didn't include the words Star or Box.

Leonard smiled at his fiancé, stealing a kiss on her neck.

"No, Howard and Bernadette are having dinner at the Rostenkowski's, and Raj and Emily are seeing a movie. It might be the University. I should get it."

Penny pouted like a child.

"On a Friday night?" She said in a huff, to which Leonard shrugged. He jumped up, trotting across the room to the kitchen island where his phone had been ringing for the last two minutes.

He glanced over to Penny on the couch, laughing and smiling as she flashed him her bra. He was so distracted by Penny's antics that he didn't bother to look at the caller ID.

"Hello?" He answered the phone, laughing.

The wheezing and crying on the other end of the line alerted Leonard that something was very wrong. He pulled the phone away from his ear, noting it was Sheldon's cell number. While Leonard was no stranger to Sheldon crying, this sounded like he was in agony. Leonard's previous smile slid off of his face.

"Sheldon? Is that you?" He asked in a panic. To his utter worry, Sheldon began to cry harder. "What's wrong?"

Sheldon couldn't get the words out. Leonard's heart jumped into his throat as he listened to his best friend and roommate sob and gurgle.

"Leonard, please…I need you. Help me," Sheldon begged, unable to catch his breath.

Leonard's immediate fear was that Sheldon had been in an accident. He was about to demand he answer him when Sheldon continued, his words choppy and his voice hysterical.

"It's Amy, Leonard. She almost died. Please. Come here. I'm alone. God. I need you Leonard. I'm s-sorry. I was alone. I need help. I don't…I don't know what's happening. If she's g-going to m-make it."

Leonard's eyes shot to Penny's in alarm. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw the look of fear cross Leonard's features.

"Leonard, what is it?" She mouthed, suddenly alert and jumping off the couch to stand by his side at the kitchen counter. He held up a finger indicating silence, and Penny saw Leonard's Adam's apple bob as he swallowed.

"Sheldon, we're on our way. Calm down, buddy. We'll be with you soon, alright? Just tell me where you are. Which hospital?"

At this, Penny opened her mouth in shock, already searching the floor for her shoes.

'_Hospital'?_

Penny knew Sheldon's penchant for hypochondria, yet the look on Leonard's face told her something was terribly wrong. Not only that…whatever Sheldon had told Leonard must not have been good. Leonard looked on the verge of an asthma attack.

Earlier, they had both wondered where Sheldon was. He left work today without informing Leonard where he was going, and he wasn't waiting for him in the quad when work was over. When dinnertime rolled around and he hadn't come home, Leonard assumed he wanted to be alone. He tried his cell, but it went straight to voicemail.

'_He's probably with Amy,_' Penny reasoned, but Leonard didn't know if that was the case. They rarely saw each other on Fridays. Howard and Raj mentioned that they saw Sheldon at lunch today, and he was behind on his work. Maybe he decided to stay at the University and catch up. It still worried Leonard to not know where Sheldon was. They had this strange routine, and even though Leonard knew the day was coming he had to cut the cord with Sheldon, he was still concerned about his friend whenever he deviated from his normally strict schedule.

'_Maybe we should look for him, or at least call Amy.'_ Leonard had suggested. Penny rolled her eyes at him.

'_Hey, he's a big boy. Leave him be. It's not our turn to babysit him. How about getting back to your fiancé over here?'_ Penny had teased.

That was three hours ago, and the pair had fallen asleep cuddling on the couch while watching American Hustle.

Leonard disconnected the call, searching the living room for his keys. He opened a kitchen cabinet, grabbing his inhaler and taking a double pump. Now Penny was truly frightened.

"Leonard, what happened to Sheldon? Is he hurt?" She asked frantically, grabbing his arm gently. Leonard shook his head, breaking free of her hold and slipping on his chucks.

"No, Penny…It's… Amy. Something bad has happened to her, but Sheldon was hysterical and couldn't explain properly. All I could understand was she almost died. They're at Pasadena General."

Penny stopped in her tracks, her breath leaving her in a gasp.

"What? Oh, god. No. Not Amy," Penny cried, following Leonard out of the apartment and flying down the stairs.

They drove the short distance to the hospital in silence, their minds full of questions. Penny was frantic as she feared what they would find, and Leonard was uneasy as he replayed Sheldon's voice in his head. In the ten years he'd known his friend, he never heard such terror stricken tones come out of his mouth.

Leonard parked and the both of them burst through the doors of the ER, racing up to the triage desk.

"May I help you, Sir?" A kindly elderly volunteer asked when they reached the counter.

"Yes, please. Our friend Amy Fowler was brought into the ER. Her boyfriend Sheldon Cooper was with her. Could you tell me where they are now?" Leonard asked, trying to be patient as the woman searched the computer. She smiled gently as she waited for the information to load.

"Dr. Fowler is currently in the ICU, Sir." She said quietly, and Leonard took Penny's hand as he heard his girlfriend sob.

"What happened?" She asked, her voice catching. The woman shook her head.

"I'm sorry, but I don't have that information. You can take the elevator downstairs and they will guide you to ICU. You will have to get passes there. It's a restricted area."

"Thank you," Leonard said, guiding Penny with his arm.

"Tell me again what Sheldon said," Penny asked in anguish, and Leonard held her hand tighter as they descended down a floor.

"He just said he needed me, and that Amy almost died. He was crying and sobbing so hard I thought he was going to pass out. I've never heard him so upset, Penny. He sounded frantic. He was babbling and incoherent."

Penny shook her head, unable to take all of this in. _Was Amy in an accident? Was she attacked? If Sheldon was with her, why wasn't he hurt as well?_

They navigated the corridor, finding the nurses station.

Leonard pulled Penny alongside him as they leaned against the counter. "Excuse me? We're here for Amy Fowler," He said earnestly.

A nurse at the station turned around to address them.

"Are you family?"

Penny narrowed her eyes.

"No. Not blood related. But we're her best friends. We _are_ her family," She said, her voice quivering.

The nurse nodded, offering a sympathetic look.

"Can you tell us her condition?" Leonard asked, and the nurse looked back and forth between them. Penny was worried she would not help them, but the woman came around the desk and joined them on the other side.

"Dr. Fowler suffered a grand mal seizure due to a high fever. She also sustained a concussion from an apparent fall in her apartment, and she has double pneumonia. She was brought in seven hours ago."

Penny gasped, looking at Leonard in shock. He put his arm around her, holding her tightly.

"Brought in by whom?" He asked.

The nurse flipped through Amy's admittance chart.

"A Sheldon Cooper. He was with her at the scene."

Leonard and Penny looked at each other blankly, each thinking the same thing. Why didn't he call them sooner, and how did he get through this by himself. He must have been freaking out.

"He is her boyfriend," Penny whispered absently, and the nurse nodded slowly. That made sense, by the way the man had been acting all evening. The man was inconsolable.

"May we see her?" Penny questioned, looking at the woman expectantly.

The nurse nodded, asking them for ID's to give them each a badge.

"You may see her, but there is only one visitor allowed at a time. Mr. Cooper is already there with her."

Leonard nodded, his eyes scanning the large area for Sheldon.

"Where is he? Penny asked in agitation. "He suffers from panic disorder. He is probably terrified. We're his best friends, as well. Please, tell us where we can find him."

"Follow the hall down to the right. Dr. Fowler is in room 213."

Leonard and Penny nodded and turned, walking as briskly as they could without disturbing the rest of the patients. When they arrived at Amy's room, the pair stopped short and held each other's hand as they gazed through the glass partition.

"Oh, god…Leonard." Penny choked out, whimpering.

The first thing they saw was Amy, looking like a robot hooked up to wires, tubes, and machines. Penny gasped at the sight of her friend, lying there broken and helpless. Leonard spotted Sheldon on the floor besides her, sitting with his legs tucked underneath him. The floor that could be 'teaming with MRSA', as Sheldon would say. The fact he was _on_ that floor told Leonard his friend was in trouble.

"Sheldon, buddy? We're here," Leonard whispered tenderly.

Sheldon looked up at the sound, dazed.

God, he looked _terrible._

His eyes looked haunted and vacant, as though he'd witnessed something horrific. They were bloodshot and black. His skin was pale as a ghost, and his hair a mess. His clothes were damp and rumpled. And was that…blood on his shirt?

Sheldon Cooper looked like chaos unfolding.

Leonard felt a stab of pain run through his heart. He stared at his best friend for endless seconds, realizing how frightful this day must have been for him. For _him_ especially. Tears welled in the shorter man's eyes. He knew without a doubt if it were Penny lying there, he'd be a mess.

"Buddy…what happened?" He whispered gently, reaching out an arm for Sheldon to help him up.

Leonard watched as Sheldon's face crumbled, rendering him a sobbing mess. Gone was the smug Sheldon. The arrogant Sheldon. In his place was a Sheldon that looked like a scared child.

At the welcome sight of his two closest friends, Sheldon struggled to stand up, breaking down and collapsing into Leonard as he started to weep. Leonard put his arms around Sheldon, an awkward task due to their height difference, and tried to console his friend. Sheldon threw his arms around him so tightly, Leonard actually gasped for breath.

Penny watched them helplessly, tears pouring from her hazel eyes. Her confused gaze passed beyond them to fall upon Amy. Her friend…her bestie. Time stood still for a moment as she tried to reconcile how this happened.

"Sheldon, what happened?" Leonard asked again, rocking Sheldon gently like a toddler who'd fallen down and needed his father's comfort. Through his sobs and hiccups, Sheldon tried to answer.

"Amy…she had a s-seizure. She…she is very sick. High fever, dehydration. D- Double pneumonia. She hit her head somehow. She could have bled to death. She almost died, Leonard. My Amy almost died." He moaned, once again burying his head in his friend's neck.

Penny thought back to yesterday, when Amy said her throat was sore. She looked a bit run down, but she never imagined it would be this bad.

"Oh, my god…How did this happen? I thought she had a sore throat?" She asked.

Sheldon turned his head, staring at Penny with a dull expression. He was trembling so badly, Leonard was vibrating as he held onto him. His lips were chapped and he could barely focus. His breathing began to become erratic as he pulled away a bit, and Leonard walked them backwards toward the window to lean up against. He put his arm around Sheldon's back to steady him.

"It…escalated. I left work today…went to her…found her. She was unresponsive. I took care of her until the paramedics arrived. I took care of her. I had to. It's in the relationship agreement. Section 4, boo boo's and ouchies. I tried to be a good boyfriend. But she wasn't answering me. She called out to me. But she wasn't answering me! I yelled her name, over and over. But she didn't answer me, Leonard! So I carried her in the shower. She was on fire. She was on fire and she was wet and I lay her on top of me and let the cold water cool her. She was bleeding. Oh, god…there was so much b-blood. So much… She wouldn't stop shaking and I had to hold her down but she was hitting me and fighting me and I thought…I thought… I didn't mean to see her naked. She will be so angry at me that I disrespected her like that. I didn't look, I swear. I know the hero always peeks. But I couldn't. I couldn't. Not w-when…she was so damn hot and burning up and I had to take off her nightgown. I think her cell phone is ruined. It got wet. Dammit… I left wet towels all over her bathroom. I didn't even lock her door. What if someone steals her monkey collection?" He rambled, his breath raspy and his lungs wheezing by the end of his tirade.

Penny and Leonard exchanged a look of alarm. Sheldon was not making sense. Cursing, stuttering, and hysterical.

Leonard guided him to the nearest chair. He knew Sheldon long enough to know he was having a major panic attack.

"Hey, buddy? I want you to concentrate on breathing for me, ok? In, and out, slowly. Focus on me, Sheldon. In and out. You can do it." He sat Sheldon down, not letting go of his hands which were like ice cubes.

Sheldon whimpered as he sat down, his long legs clumsily falling to the side as he tried to do as Leonard instructed. He couldn't breathe.

"I…f-found her Leonard. I found her. She was so pale," he cried, and Leonard rubbed his back.

"It's alright, Sheldon. She's here now, and they are taking good care of her. You saved her life, buddy. You did well. You saved her. She'll make it through this. She will. She has you. She has us, too."

The pain in Leonard's voice touched Sheldon. Everyone loved Amy. His girlfriend had become a vital part of their social group. For a long time, Sheldon knew they didn't warm to her. But her quirkiness, sweetness, and fun loving nature brought them around. Just like she did with him.

For years, he fought against her charms. By the time he knew what hit him, it was too late. He had fallen in love with the hotsy-totsy from Glendale. Thinking of her now, all by herself today…Sheldon didn't know if he could ever forgive himself.

"Leonard…she must have felt so alone. I left her all alone. God…my poor Amy." He sobbed, dropping his head to his knees while Leonard rubbed his back.

Penny stood next to Amy, taking her cold hand in hers.

"Oh, Ames…what happened?" She whispered, her tears falling faster. She looked around the room, watching the monitor's and not comprehending what everything meant.

Leonard held onto Sheldon, lowering himself next to his chair until his breathing slowly returned to normal and the deep sobs stopped wracking his body. Sheldon raised his head. He looked at Leonard with grief stricken eyes.

"I should have stayed with her last night. I should have made sure she was alright. I left her, Leonard. I left her. She could have died. What kind of a boyfriend am I? What kind of a _man_ am I? You would never have left Penny. I was so worried about my feelings, and I couldn't wait to distance myself from her. How can I forgive myself?" He asked in disgust, his voice high pitched and frantic. The level of desperation scared Leonard.

"Sheldon, it's not your fault. The fact you found her and took care of her is what's important. Thank god you were there."

Sheldon closed his eyes, unable to take in Leonard's words. He was no hero. If anything, he was the villain here.

Someone walked into Amy's room, clearing their throat quietly. Sheldon looked up, unfocused, and slowly recognized the Dr. that he saw earlier outside Amy's room.

"Hello. I'm Dr. Preston, and I'm on duty for the next twelve hours. Dr. Fowler is my patient. Are you family of hers?"

Sheldon rose unsteadily, making his way to the man.

"I am her boyfriend and emergency contact, Sheldon Cooper. These are our friends. What…what is her condition?" Sheldon asked, not bothering to greet him. The man folded his arms, bowing his head.

"Dr. Fowler suffered a very serious seizure, as you know. Sometime during the course of the day, her body temperature rose to a dangerous degree. She probably didn't even realize it. Was she feeling ill before this?" He asked, looking from Sheldon to Penny and Leonard. Penny shook her head in the affirmative, and Sheldon cleared his throat.

"Yes. She…last night she complained of a sore throat. I made her tea and put her to bed," Sheldon whispered, not meeting the doctor's gaze.

The doctor nodded.

"Well, what she assumed was a sore throat was actually streptococcus, a serious infection. We have her on intravenous antibiotics. A concern we have is that Rheumatic fever from it being undetected nor treated for a few days can occur and affect Amy's heart. She also has double pneumonia. Both of her lungs were fluid filled. She could have drowned in her own tissues if you were any later bringing her in. Pneumonia can escalate rapidly if the conditions are right. She is severely dehydrated. What we are most concerned about is the fact she stopped breathing. We don't know the lasting damage, if any, to the brain. We've put her in a medically induced coma. Our goal now is to clear her lungs, so we have a respirator doing the work for her, and also clear up the infection both in her throat and in the lungs. Do you have any questions?" He asked.

Penny looked up expectantly.

"I have a question…how did this escalate so rapidly? She seemed okay yesterday." She said, her voice cracking.

"As I said, if the conditions are right, the trauma can escalate. She was probably feeling ill for days and brushed it off. Not to mention she sustained a pretty intense concussion when she fell and the blood loss sent her into shock. Has Dr. Fowler been under any undue emotional distress lately? That can also weaken the body's immunity immensely."

Leonard pulled his brows down, frowning. He had no idea. But Penny winced as she thought back to her and Amy's conversation yesterday. It was apparent Amy was very upset about Sheldon. Her eyes found his momentarily, and Sheldon knew. He just knew.

Amy must have discussed her fears with Penny, as well.

Sheldon felt like he was going to die. Literally. Right there, in this room.

_Emotional distress…no. None. Unless you count your girlfriend worrying that her boyfriend isn't attracted to her. Or that he places her second best behind her best friend._ _Or that he doesn't trust her enough to let her in, when she'd wasted four years of her life with him. _

He shook his head in disgust at himself, turning around to face the window. The Dr. looked at the three friends, offering a sympathetic look.

"We will just have to wait and keep the faith. We are doing everything possible for Dr. Fowler," Dr. Preston said kindly.

Sheldon's throat was dry. A medically induced coma. Dear God…

"Are you…are you saying that she can't breathe on her own?" He whispered, unable to turn around. The Dr. sighed heavily.

"Mr. Cooper…Amy has suffered a great trauma. She has double pneumonia, which is very serious. We want to allow her lungs and brain to heal. That's not to say she can't breathe on her own. But we feel it's the best course of action right now. But I must ask, per hospital policy. Does Dr. Fowler have an advanced directive, and a living will?"

Sheldon felt his lips tingling and his eyes watering. He slammed his eyes shut, unwilling to even hear this. But he knew, it was necessary. He was a Scientist. What the Dr. was asking was only logical.

"Yes," He rasped, covering his face with his hands. "I was her witness. I authenticated and notarized her will."

"Oh, God…" Penny whispered, turning into Leonard's waiting arms. She sobbed quietly while Leonard rubbed her back. Sheldon couldn't fathom how this was happening. It had to be a nightmare he couldn't wake up from.

"Will she recover from this?" He asked, finally…his voice sounding desolate.

In a gesture he rarely made, Dr. Preston walked over and put his hand on Sheldon's back. Sheldon flinched, but didn't move away.

"She needs time and rest. She is young and strong, and in good physical shape otherwise. I won't lie to you…this is serious. But I have every reason to believe Amy will recover. Thanks in part to you, and you're quick thinking.

Sheldon whirled around, his face a mask of incredulity.

_Thanks to me?_

"I'm sorry…what did you say? Thanks to _me_?"

The shock and anger in his voice confused Dr. Preston.

"It says here in her chart you were with her at the scene. You saved her life, according to the Paramedics who treated her.

Sheldon felt like he was falling down the rabbit-hole, head first.

"_Saved her life?_ I almost killed her! I didn't even realize she stopped breathing. I didn't administer CPR. She could have died because of me!" He said sharply, staring at the older man with rage. There was no way he was going to take credit for doing nothing more than behaving like a coward.

Dr. Preston shook his head, once again checking Amy's chart.

"The Paramedics report says you put her in the shower which lowered her body temperature. You kept her from swallowing her tongue as she was seizing. You put much needed pressure on her head wound to stop the bleeding. And you called 911. Without you there…your girlfriend would most certainly have not made it. Her outcome may have been fatal. You _did_ save her life, Mr. Cooper."

Sheldon's vision swam as white lights flashed in front of him.

_No, no, no…this man was wrong! He was no hero. He was a villain. He left his girlfriend alone. He avoided her all night and day. He didn't give her CPR. He was a monster. _

The Dr. met his frantic gaze, worried that this man might need to be in intensive care, as well.

"Well…I must continue my rounds. If you need anything, please…don't hesitate to have me paged. She will be receiving round the clock care."

Leonard walked over, shaking Dr. Preston's hand. Penny watched him leave, and she motioned to Leonard to look in Sheldon's direction.

"Sheldon, come on. Sit down. You look completely exhausted." Leonard said quietly, but Sheldon shrugged off his friend's hand.

"Sheldon…you need some rest. You look dead on your feet.

"No…I have to stay with her. I can't leave her alone. I'm her boyfriend."

Penny bit her lip. "Sheldon, Leonard will take you home so you can rest. You are dead on your feet. I will stay with Amy. Don't worry, I won't leave her." She said gently.

Sheldon shook his head rapidly. "No, Penny! I said I'm not leaving her. You're welcome to stay, but I'm not going. I've left her enough."

Penny knew she was never going to win this argument. He looked about ready to collapse, and she shot Leonard a beseeching look for help. He shook his head, knowing it was futile.

"Okay, Sheldon. We understand. Penny and I are going to go to the waiting room and call everyone. Just ask a nurse to come get us if you need us, alright?"

Sheldon nodded stiffly.

"Sheldon, can we get you anything; something to eat or a drink? You must be starving," Penny asked softly.

"No thank you." He said, barely audible. His eyes looked haunted. He stared at his two friends, so grateful for their love and support. He felt better now that they were here, but nothing save Amy waking up could heal him now. As Leonard and Penny prepared to leave, he called them back with a sorrowful voice.

"Leonard? Penny?"

They turned in unison, and Sheldon swallowed deeply.

_Appreciate them, Sheldon…_

"Thank you. For…being here with me. For being with Amy," he whispered, overcome. Penny shook her head, turning away from his as the tears fell. Leonard smiled brokenly at his friend.

"Of course we're here, buddy. We love you. And we love Amy. We'll just be down the hall, okay?"

He nodded slowly, overwhelmed. He had never before had such dear friends; people who accepted him as he was, warts and all. No matter how crazy and unreasonable he was, they put up with him. Leonard, Penny, Howard, and Raj…he thought back to when he first moved here, how utterly alone he felt. They saved him.

_Amy_ saved him…Things _had_ to change. _He_ had to change. It was time.

Turning away from his friends, Sheldon sat once again in that torture device of a chair. It was nothing less than he deserved, he reasoned.

'…_You saved her life_…' Dr. Preston had said.

No. He refused to believe that. He couldn't believe it. He knew CPR. He knew how to administer it. He thought he had all of the bases covered when he dragged Amy into that shower. She almost died, because of an oversight. What if she had stopped breathing for more than two minutes? What if she never regained consciousness, losing oxygen going to the brain?

A _hero_? He was no hero. He was a coward. If he had called her this morning to check on her, instead of trying to avoid her, she would never be here. It was all his fault.

Sheldon shook his head rapidly, dispelling those thoughts. He could not deal with the onslaught. His brain was shutting down, like a computer that had been put in safe mode. Warm tears trickled down his cheeks, exhausting him further.

He closed his eyes, trying to focus on the sound of his Meemaw singing Soft Kitty to him. Meemaw always had the answers; she always made him feel better. How he wanted her here now. She would love Amy, he knew she would. He thought in mortification how he never introduced the two most important women in his life. What if it were too late now?

"I'm so sorry, Amy. So sorry…I keep failing you," he sobbed, fearing he would never stop crying. His mind went back to last night, seeing Amy engulfed in her sheets, begging him to kiss her goodnight. And he'd left her, after scolding her because he didn't want to catch her cold. If only he hadn't been so selfish. What if she never woke up? What if he never got the chance to kiss her again?

Quiet sobs wracked Sheldon's body, until he felt himself falling, falling…his head landing in a soft thud against Amy's waist.

Exhaustion and grief overtaking him, Sheldon fell asleep on Amy's lap.

A/N – Earlier update for you than predicted. You might have caught the fact Sheldon introduced himself to Dr. Preston as Sheldon Cooper, and not _Dr._ Sheldon Cooper. There is a reason for this. Part of Sheldon's long trip back from Egoville will be to realize not everything in life is about pointing out your accomplishments. And right now, Sheldon doesn't care that he has a PhD in Physics. His whole world is hanging in the balance. OOC? Maybe. But just a further step towards Sheldon 2.0


	10. Chapter 10

~Chapter 10~

A/N- I cannot thank everyone enough for your love for this story. I never imagined when I began writing this nine months ago, that so many people would accept and relate to it. I know it's not your typical BBT story. I've always been better at writing angst than 'fluff'. But don't worry…Fluff will make its way in soon enough. I enjoy every conversation through reviews and PM's. For guests that I can't contact, please know that your interest and input is very much appreciated, even if I cannot thank you directly.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied. Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs. If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks. Then I'll follow you into the dark…" Death Cab for Cutie – I Will Follow You into the Dark

Five friends were gathered around the coffee table in the ICU lounge, catching up on the events of the last 6 hours. It was well past 1 am, and everyone was exhausted.

Raj had just dropped Emily off at home after their date when Leonard called him. Hearing the words '_Amy is in intensive care'_ shook him to his core. His heart was breaking for his friend.

Amy had become like a little sister to him in many ways. They had spent many lunch hours at Caltech together talking about love, life, and the Universe, especially while Sheldon was on his journey last summer. Raj felt ashamed that he once admitted to her and the girls that he was never into her. Sheldon was a lucky man to have such a special woman love him. She was beautiful in her own, wholesome way. Just like Sheldon, he mused. The pair of them just…fit.

"I just can't believe this happened. Poor Amy," Bernadette lamented, sniffling. Howard tightened his grip around his wife's shoulders. He himself had grown extremely fond of the quirky Neuroscientist. He thought back to the day Sheldon had met her, at the coffee shop. He remembered his incredulous words to Raj after this strange creature parroted Sheldon's words back to him like reading from a script Sheldon himself had written.

'_Good God, what have we done?'…_

Seeing this female version of Sheldon, so much his mirror image…had been spooky to say the least. At first with his flat out refusal to meet the enigmatic woman, and then his 'haughty derision' later on, Howard was certain the date would be a disaster. He was shocked and intrigued how Sheldon not only offered to buy her a beverage, but sat down and chatted to her for nearly an hour before exchanging email addresses, cell phone numbers, work numbers, and Facebook information.

Thus, the Shamy was born.

While they all felt in the beginning that Amy was strange and extremely direct, she had no doubt won them over. She was fun to be with, fiercely loyal, and the fact she adored Neil Diamond made Howard and her kindred spirits. Howard found himself forcing back his own tears. Amy was a good woman, a good person, and a good friend. It just wasn't fair.

Composing himself, he leaned his head upon his wife's head as he held her.

"I know, honey…it's awful." He said, trying to comfort her.

Bernadette was clearly upset by what had happened to her friend. In many ways, they were closer than either was with Penny. They shared more in common, due to their academic achievements, and Howard knew Bernadette was trying to hold herself together.

"I can't believe I've said such horrible things to her in the past. What if she never wakes up and I can't apologize? I didn't mean any of it," She wept, turning her face into her husband's neck.

Her constant ribs about Sheldon and Amy's non-existent sex life haunted Bernadette. She knew that the problem of intimacy lay with Sheldon's hang-ups, not Amy. Sheldon was clearly attracted to Amy, but was afraid to take their relationship to the next level. Whatever possessed her to mock Amy for that, she didn't know. Maybe it was the fact that all her life, Bernadette had been lucky in the romance department. Having been blessed with brains and overt beauty, things came much more easily to her. She thought of her shy, conservative friend being bullied over the years, and cried even harder.

"I'm a monster," She sobbed, and Howard tried to console her.

"Bernie, Amy knows you love her. Girlfriends bicker. So do us guys. I don't think Amy thinks you really feel that way." He tried, but she only cried harder.

He turned his eyes towards Leonard, his expression worried.

"How is Sheldon doing, Leonard?" He asked. He thought of his friend, and how difficult these things were for him to deal with. It was bad enough when Professor Proton died. But the fact it was _Amy_ lying in ICU… Howard wished he could be there with Sheldon to comfort him. But Sheldon hadn't even come out to see everyone, as he wouldn't leave Amy's room.

They were all confused about what had transpired that day; all Howard and Raj knew was that Sheldon was on the verge of collapse at lunch. They couldn't imagine him then going to Amy's and enduring what he did. Sheldon hadn't mentioned anything at all about Amy not feeling well. As far as they knew, he was headed to his office for a nap.

Leonard had tried to fill them in as best he could, but he knew Sheldon was the one to fill in the gaps. The trouble was, Sheldon was looking like the walking dead and could barely string a sentence together.

Leonard had gone back down to the ICU to check on things after calling everyone. Seeing Sheldon passed out by Amy's bedside, his hand in hers, he asked a nurse if she would bring him a blanket. He must have been frozen stuck in those damp clothes all day. The last thing he wanted was Sheldon to get sick himself. He met Howard's somber gaze, frowning deeply.

"He's…not doing so well. I don't think he's slept for the last two nights. And today was highly emotional for him. He found Amy, and took care of her until the paramedics took over. But seeing her experience that seizure was hard for him. Not to mention seeing all of the blood she lost. I'm considering having a doctor here check him out. He refuses to leave Amy's side, even though he is clearly in shock, and hasn't eaten all day. He looks chilled to the bone. I asked a nurse down in ICU to bring him a blanket."

Raj discreetly wiped his eyes. He always knew Sheldon loved Amy, even though he tried to downplay it. He must be going through hell right now after all he witnessed today. He thought back to that afternoon, and how upset Sheldon was over his and Howard's teasing him. Raj felt guilty, considering all that had transpired.

"He seemed so distracted at lunch today. We shouldn't have upset him by teasing him again," He said remorsefully. He met Howard's gaze and the two shrugged their shoulders.

"Maybe one of us should take him home, put him to bed. He needs to sleep, Leonard," Howard spoke up, his voice concerned. Everyone nodded, knowing that was what was best, but Leonard knew Sheldon wouldn't have it.

"Penny and I tried to persuade him. He is so out of it, we couldn't convince him. I've never seen him like this. I don't even recognize him. I mean…I know Sheldon can be trying most of the time. But he is completely grief stricken. He has it in his head that her illness is his fault."

Bernadette grimaced as she sat up, looking at Leonard in shock.

"That's crazy. It's not his fault she got sick. And she is lucky he was there," She reasoned. "The poor thing might have died if he hadn't found her. Thank god Sheldon left work when he did. Any later…" She whispered, the alternative too grim to consider.

Leonard bit his lip, the reality of Bernie's words hard to accept.

"Yes, that's what we told him. But he feels guilty that he didn't stay with her last night. You know how Sheldon gets, Bernadette. He takes emotional hits pretty hard. I have to admit…seeing Amy so ill has me shaken up as well. She just looks so…vulnerable. I've never seen anyone look so fragile, let alone a close friend. It was pretty scary."

Bernadette rose and walked over the nurse's station, leaving everyone staring after her in curiosity.

Penny put down her coffee cup on the table, running a hand through her short locks.

"I wish Amy had called me. I'm still not clear why she didn't. She could have texted me. Anything… I should have called her. I knew she wasn't feeling well yesterday. I even asked her if she wanted me to take her to the Dr. I feel like this is my fault, as well." Penny said, tears forming in her eyes.

Leonard shook his head, laying his hand atop his fiance's gently.

"No, honey. You heard the doctor. Her fever escalated quickly. She probably wasn't even aware things had gotten so bad until it was too late. Look…we can all feel guilty because she's our friend and we should have checked on her. But we can't go back and change that now. All we can do is hope and pray for the best, and be there for Amy while she's recovering. She is going to need a lot of support. So will Sheldon."

Penny nodded, still unconvinced that she was blameless. Some bestie, she thought miserably. She knew Amy was emotional yesterday. She should have pressed the issue. It was becoming clearer to Penny that Amy was a much better friend to Penny than Penny was to her. Penny vowed to change that.

Leonard rose, whipping his cell phone out of his pocket.

"I'm going to call President Siebert and leave him a voicemail at the University. He needs to know what happened to Amy, and that Sheldon will need some time off. I doubt even if he could work, he would. He won't even leave her room."

Penny looked up, a thought crossing her mind.

"Maybe you should call Amy's mother, Leonard. Or find out if the staff here has called her. While you're at it, call Mary Cooper. Sheldon is going to need his mother's comfort now."

Leonard nodded in the affirmative.

"Good thinking. I'll be back."

Howard, Raj, and Penny watched him walk over to the doorway to make the calls.

Howard pursed his lips in thought. "You know…it makes you think. We go through life taking everything and everyone for granted. Then in a second, it's gone. Raj and I were teasing Sheldon at lunch today about date night last night. We had no idea that across town, Amy was near death. It's crazy, how quickly things can change."

Penny stared at Howard, tears gathering in her eyes. In her young life, she hadn't had to face death yet. She supposed when you were younger, death wasn't something that happened to you. It happened to older people, sick people, or people in wartime. Having a young, healthy friend almost die was a wake up call. Not only that, but Penny considered the sisterhood that Amy brought to her life. Without her, Penny's world would be a different place.

"You're right, Howard. We don't appreciate what we have until it's gone." She said softly.

Penny's eyes trailed to Leonard, and Howard's to Bernadette's, before coming to rest back on one another.

They shared a look of quiet understanding, a sad smile passing between them.

Bernadette came back, sitting down. The three of them looked at her expectantly.

"I spoke with a nurse about Sheldon. She is going to have an orderly bring in a recliner so he can stretch out and get some proper sleep, and she will bring him some food. Howie, how about you and I going to his place and getting some clothes for him? He's going to catch pneumonia himself if he doesn't get a warm shower and change into some dry clothes."

Howard smiled at his wife, touched by her kindness.

They were all a ragtag group of people, but they had all forged friendships and relationships that were special and deep. He would never have met Bernie if he hadn't met Penny first, and Sheldon and Amy never would have met without himself and Raj blackmailing Sheldon. For whatever reason, they had forged this unit that worked. He knew they would help Amy get through this. They were in this together.

"That sounds like a good idea. Let me wait for Leonard and I'll get his key. He went to call President Siebert to inform him of what's happening." He said softly.

"Okay Howie," She whispered, sitting down. Looking at her watch, she was stunned to see it was 1:30 am.

It was going to be a long night.

"Dr. Cooper?"

Sheldon turned his face toward the voice addressing him, finding it difficult to open his eyes. Was he dreaming? Was that too much to hope for; waking up in his warm bed, with everything back to normal?

The hope that bloomed in his chest for a second floundered as he looked into the eyes of a strange woman, wearing a stethoscope around her neck.

"Yes?" He rasped, his voice scratchy from tears and not drinking for hours.

"My name is Dana. I'm Amy's nurse this evening. Your friends are down in the ICU lounge. They are extremely worried about you and the fact you haven't eaten or drank anything for hours. I told them I would bring you something.

Sheldon frowned down at the tray of food. It contained a questionable looking sandwich and what appeared to be fruit salad. There was also strange looking pudding, a large bottle of water, and a bottle of Gatorade. The look of it turned his stomach.

"No, I-…" he began, but she shot him a hard look.

"_Yes,_ Dr. Cooper. You _will_ eat this. The last thing Miss Fowler needs is to know you have fallen ill yourself. If you don't eat and drink this down, I will have to have you removed and brought up to the ER. You are well on your way to becoming dehydrated yourself," She said sternly.

Sheldon closed his eyes. The truth was, he didn't have it in him to eat. He was beyond tired. Besides, it was Friday. And Friday was Chinese food. Wait, it was Saturday now…or was it Sunday?

"I'm just so tired," He whispered, and the woman instantly felt sympathy for him. He seemed to have been to hell and back in the last few hours. She couldn't imagine seeing the one you love so sick, and feeling so helpless. It was obvious to her that this man was head over heels in love with the small woman currently sleeping in the bed next to them.

Being a nurse offered her a bird's eye view into the private side of what people suffered. But she formed a certain detachment; she had to. It was a mathematical certainty that part of her job was to experience death.

"I know you are tired, Dr. Cooper. That is clear as day. If you get some glucose and fluids in you, it will be easier for you to sleep. Dr. Preston arranged for a recliner to be brought in so you can lie down and rest. But if you don't eat, you won't be doing either of you any favors. Please, try. For Amy's sake."

Sheldon became alert at the mention of her name, staring at the nurse wide eyed. She was right. He had to stay healthy to be able to take care of her. He wouldn't be able to do that if he landed in the hospital alongside her.

Okay… I'll try," He whispered, taking the Gatorade bottle off the tray and drinking from it obediently. The taste was sour and he wanted to spit it out. But he swallowed it like he knew he should.

Dana did her calculations, checking the gauges on Amy's various monitors and inserting syringe after syringe into her IV lines. Sheldon watched every move, making sure Amy wasn't harmed in any way. He choked down the sandwich as though someone was chasing him, the gummy bread tasting like sawdust in his mouth. Dana touched his shoulder gently as she was finishing up with Amy.

"Thank you for seeing reason, Dr. Cooper. You should feel better soon. I will be back shortly to check on our patient." She said kindly.

Sheldon watched her leave, closing his eyes when he and Amy were alone.

He had no idea how much time had passed as he sat there after he ate, his gaze drifting from Amy to the window. Before he knew it, dawn was breaking. It was the third dawn he witnessed in as many days. He dozed on and off for hours, but nothing could keep him asleep for long. He kept vigil over Amy, guarding her as Dr., Nurse, PA, and orderly alike filtered into the room to check her condition. No one spoke, and that was fine with him. As long as they kept her safe and comfortable, he was happy.

He was appreciative of the sleeper recliner they brought him; he was spent and couldn't even think straight. He angled the chair close to Amy, trying not to get in the way of the hospital staff coming into to tend to her. He had to be there, holding her hand. It was his only anchor to this world.

An older woman walked into the room suddenly, and Sheldon was on full alert. He looked at her, his eyes bleary. What the hell time was it, anyway? He squinted as he looked at his watch. It read 7:05 am.

Confusion gave way to clarity as he studied her; she was a small woman, with light brown hair and wire rim glasses. She looked as exhausted as he felt. When she turned her frightened eyes to his, Sheldon gulped deeply.

Mrs. Fowler?" He rasped, unfurling his aching limbs to stand up and greet her. The woman looked at him, startled, as Sheldon came forward and extended his hand. It was an awkward meeting; they hadn't seen or spoken since that disastrous joke of a web call he and Amy played on her.

"Yes. Hello Dr. Cooper," She said, her voice quivering. She recognized her daughter's boyfriend not only from the few pictures she had seen of him and Amy together, but from the skype call they shared three years ago.

"Sheldon," He automatically corrected. Having Amy's mother address him so formally seemed disrespectful to her somehow. He was raised with manners, after all, even if he sometimes forgot how to use them.

"Alright…Sheldon, then. How is my daughter?" She asked softly, afraid of the worst.

Sheldon licked his dry lips.

"She's…more stable than yesterday. But the Dr.'s have placed her in a…medical coma to help her heal. She is very ill. It has been a hard night," He whispered, looking down at his feet. He felt ashamed that he himself hadn't contacted Amy's mother. In his hysteria earlier, the thought never occurred to him.

Mrs. Fowler nodded, upset that she was out of town at her sister's when the hospital called. Thank god she came home when she did, though.

"I'm sure it was. I'm sorry I wasn't here sooner. I was in Bakersfield visiting my sister. The hospital called me after midnight and explained her condition. I almost lost my baby. Thank you for being there, and helping her. I don't know how to repay you." She whispered, her voice crackling with gratitude.

Sheldon balked at that, wincing slightly.

"Repay me, Ma'am? For what? Amy is my girlfriend. I…" He faltered, suddenly feeling dizzy again. He stumbled on his feet, searching blindly for the chair.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to appear rude, but I am very tired. I've been up for two days and I'm having trouble seeing straight," He answered honestly. "May I offer you a chair as well?" He asked cordially.

Mrs. Fowler looked at him with kind eyes, albeit guarded. She knew this man cared for her daughter very much, but he had purposely kept his distance from Amy's family over the years and for that, she found him a bit strange. However, in the wake of this, she could see that he was not as selfish as she first imagined. From what she knew of Dr. Sheldon Cooper, he was a man who demanded order. Yet he looked positively dreadful. She felt bad for him and all he must have suffered witnessing Amy's decline.

"Thank you, Sheldon," She said, having a seat across from him. "Were you…there? With Amy yesterday? Or did you find her, afterwards?" She whispered, her voice brittle and frightened. Sheldon could only nod slowly, still unwilling to remember the events of the last 18 hours.

"I…was there. I witnessed all of it. Except for when she hit her head…I missed that part," He said quietly, his blue eyes taking on a glossy sheen.

Sheldon met her look of compassion, so much like her daughters. Could she sense the guilt he felt, the torment?

He had no idea how to act around this woman. The last time they spoke, he said some horribly offensive things to her. Of course, they were in jest, prompted by Amy. But still…he was a Southern gentleman and when he remembered what he told Mrs. Fowler that day it made him cringe. Neither one was eager nor willing to revisit that occasion. It was hardly the time for such a conversation anyway.

Mrs. Fowler stepped up to Amy, taking her hand gently. Her eyes were soft as she watched her daughter, tears beginning to trek down her cheeks. Sheldon sat back quietly, not sure if he should leave the room and give them privacy. She turned to face him, her face pale.

"What happened to her, Sheldon? I spoke with Amy four days ago and she was fine. She didn't even mention a cold coming on."

Sheldon swallowed thickly. She told _him_, though. And he allowed her to walk on a windy beach, barefoot of all things. He closed his eyes as he tried to gather his thoughts and tamp down his guilt.

Rising on unsteady legs, he made his way to her side and folded his hands together.

"We had a date Thursday evening, and she complained of a sore throat. We went back to her apartment for a while and I made her tea. I left her around 11. I tried to reach her yesterday afternoon, to no avail, so I left work and took the bus to her apartment around 2. I found her…" He trailed off, his throat closing. He didn't know if he could mention what condition her daughter was in when he found her, or how he had to undress her in order to help her. Biting his lip, he met her eyes. Nothing was said as they stared at each other, Sheldon feeling judged and guilty.

"The doctor I spoke with this morning said you saved her life. He said you knew exactly what to do so she wouldn't have a stroke," She said, wonder and gratitude in her voice. "Thank you for being there."

Sheldon gulped and looked away, finding the linoleum very interesting.

"Ironic, isn't it?"

Sheldon didn't quite understand her meaning. He raised his brows at her.

"What is ironic, Ma'am?"

Mrs. Fowler shrugged, once again focusing on Amy.

"That my daughter is a Neurobiologist, who dissects and studies brains for a living. She suffered a seizure…That is not the way she would have wanted to die," She said quietly.

Sheldon nodded at that, but found no humor in her statement, ironic or otherwise. She gazed at Sheldon in a way he found both intrusive and comforting. It spoke of motherly love and nurturing, and he deserved none.

"You should go home and rest for a while," She suggested kindly, her voice soft.

Looking over Amy's still frame, he found himself shaking his head.

"I'd prefer not to, Mrs. Fowler. I will leave for a while and give you privacy with your daughter, but I am not leaving the hospital until she wakes up completely."

His tone brook no argument, so Mrs. Fowler nodded.

"What about work? I'm sure you have matters you must attend to. It's not fair to allow you to play nursemaid to Amy, at the cost of your own health. You have already done so much for her," She said gently.

Sheldon felt a bubble of hysteria beginning to well up inside of him. Two days ago, he was thinking the very same thing; if Amy broke her leg walking on that blasted beach, he would no doubt be called to duty to nurse her. He conjured up the feelings of inconvenience that had stirred.

Selfish bastard. As though a stupid relationship agreement should dictate to him the love and concern he should show his girlfriend.

Sheldon began to laugh hysterically, the exhaustion and guilt overwhelming him. Mrs. Fowler gaped at him wide eyed, not sure how to react to his inappropriate laughter, when all of a sudden his laughter turned into sobs. Her eyes widened, and she put her hand on his shoulder awkwardly, trying to soothe him. Her touch was like an angel, and he was a condemned man who didn't deserve it. He jerked back from her touch, startling her.

"I wish everyone would stop praising me and thanking me! I am the reason she is lying here right now. I'm not her hero. I'm not her Savior. I am a coward, that's what I am. I should have stayed with her that night. I should never have left her," He wailed, putting his head in his hands. He just wanted to disappear. The horror he felt at pouring out his heart to Amy's mother, of all people…was quite simply the most humiliating thing he'd ever done. He had to remain strong for Amy. Not turn into a blubbering mess!

Mrs. Fowler turned and stared at her daughter helplessly. She was still, other than the rise of her chest from the oxygen being pumped into her. Looking over at Sheldon's sob wracked body, she knew without a doubt this man loved her. Amy had always considered herself to be invisible. It was clear that someone had _finally_ seen her clearly.

For whatever reason Sheldon was berating himself now, she knew for certain it was not his fault. He _had_ saved Amy. Maybe that was the problem. He couldn't reconcile the fact he was the one to whom she owed her life.

Amy once mentioned to her that Sheldon detested receiving gifts even more than giving them. He did not wish to be obligated to the giver. She read once that certain Indian tribes felt if you saved a man's life, you were responsible for them forever.

Amy was now Sheldon Cooper's responsibility. And that, more than anything else, scared the man to death.

She turned to the lanky Physicist, who was practically hyperventilating in the corner. The man, she was certain, was her Amy's soulmate.

If you believed in that sort of thing.

Walking over to him, she dared to touch him again gently. He stared at her, waiting for the hammer to drop.

"Sheldon…I think it's time you and I had a heart to heart talk."

_Bang._

A/N – Thank you once again for reading. I will be very busy this weekend helping my husband in his chocolate shop for Valentine's Day. I know what you're thinking: 'Lucky Girl'! I myself am thinking, 'Foolish Girl'! … Don't you _know_ what you're in for? If you happen to review, and do not hear back from me immediately, do not worry. I will respond ASAP. Happy Valentine's Day to all. Spend it with someone you love. Even if that person is yourself. XoXo


	11. Chapter 11

~Chapter 11~

A/N – It has been lovely conversing with all of you. This is the finest fandom on . It's lovely to see so many Shamy Shippers.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…If our hearts are never broken, then there's no joy in the mending. There's so much this hurt can teach us both. Though there's distance and there's silence, your words have never left me, they're the prayer that I say every day…" Snow Patrol – New York

Mrs. Fowler suggested they go to the cafeteria to talk, and Sheldon couldn't think of a reason to deny her. He could beg off by saying he was exhausted, which he was…but this was Amy's mother, and he owed her respect. He'd spent the better part of four years avoiding any interactions with this woman. Why, he wasn't certain.

Perhaps, he'd come to suspect, it was because meshing himself with his girlfriend's family was just so…final. They would see him. The _real_ him. And they may not be as accommodating as Amy. He'd long feared it was because of his touch aversion, or the fact he didn't like to speak to strangers.

The truth was that he was terrified they wouldn't accept him. What if they didn't like him, and tried to persuade Amy to end their relationship?

Sheldon would hardly admit to that in the past. Yet being faced with the reality of Mrs. Fowler here, wanting to _talk_ to him, brought it to the forefront of his mind.

After refreshing himself with a shower in Amy's bathroom, where he began to feel something close to human again, he changed into the clean clothes Howard and Bernadette had brought for him. Changing into them slowly, methodically, his mind drifted back to when Dana brought them in earlier before her shift ended.

"Your friend Howard asked me to bring you these. Your friends must love you both very much, Dr. Cooper. They stayed in the lounge until after 4 am, getting updates on Dr. Fowler's progress. They want you to know they will be back later on this morning, and for you to call them if you need anything before then."

Staring at the neat pile of clothes in the duffle bag, which included his own toiletries, Sheldon was overwhelmed with emotion. They were the best friends anyone could have. They were caring, supportive, and intelligent people, who brightened his life with their presence. He felt a stab of shame again at how badly he'd treated them over the years, especially Howard.

He thanked Dana, sitting down once again with the bag on his lap. He couldn't bring himself to shower at the time, still in a daze and not wanting to leave Amy. Now that Mrs. Fowler wanted to _talk_, he knew the time had come to make himself look like less of a vagrant.

The cafeteria was surprisingly busy for such an early hour, but Sheldon found a table for two that was quiet and out of the way. He wasn't quite sure what a heart to heart talk with Amy's mother entailed, but he wasn't about to take any chances and have strangers overhear. As tired as he was, he did the gentlemanly thing and bought Mrs. Fowler a cup of coffee before guiding her to the table he had chosen.

The morning nurse had come in earlier to inform them Dr. Preston wanted Amy to be taken for some more tests. They would take several hours, due to her condition. But if they showed improvement, it was a positive sign that no lasting brain damaged occurred from both her seizure and the head trauma. She updated Amy's mother on her condition, and what happened yesterday.

All the while Sheldon stood next to Amy, holding her hand gently in his own. Hers was so cold…he tried to warm her, squeezing her hand and rubbing it. He knew they had given her some powerful sedatives to induce her medical coma. He also knew it was necessary to keep her calm and allow her body to rest and repair itself. Right now, he didn't care about what it took. He only wanted her to open her eyes again.

He tuned out the commotion of the machines and the babel of the voices in the room. All he focused on, was Amy.

Amy, as she had looked at him the night he asked her to be his girlfriend. The way her lashes fluttered and her voice faltered as he handed her the relationship agreement.

'_That's so romantic…'_

Or the way she smiled at him in that sly, overjoyed way when she realized that she _had, indeed, _increased his feelings for her in an accelerated time frame. His pitiful _'Uh, Oh'_ was no match for her. She blithely took a sip of her wine, knowing victory was hers.

He needed to focus on those moments. His perfect memory was all he had now.

He had looked up from his silent reverie to find Amy's mother staring at him intensely.

"Thank you for the coffee, Sheldon. Are you sure you wouldn't like to join me in a cup?" She asked, blowing demurely on her steaming beverage.

Sheldon scrunched his nose up politely.

"You're welcome, Ma'am. But no thank you. I don't drink coffee; I'm more of tea drinker."

Mrs. Fowler nodded, her gaze turning toward the window. The sun was shining brightly now, the daffodils outside swaying in the breeze. She looked back at the young man across from her, noting his rigid demeanor. He looked ready to bolt at any moment.

It was obvious he was exhausted. But the extent of it went deeper than that of just the last twenty-four hours. He looked guarded and aloof, and she wondered for the millionth time exactly how this man and her daughter shared a meaningful relationship. It might have been presumptuous, but she had the impression of Sheldon Cooper as an emotional cripple.

Still, she could afford him the benefit of the doubt. He obviously cared for her daughter deeply, evidenced by the way he had been with her all night. And he saved her life yesterday. She owed him everything for that.

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, Sheldon. I realize you are tired, and I won't add to your stress. But I think it is time for us to talk. I wish Amy had brought you home to perhaps have dinner with us, but I realize your schedules are full. It's a shame we had to formally meet under these circumstances."

Sheldon bit his lip, gauging her sincerity.

"I agree, Mrs. Fowler," He offered politely, folding his hands on the table. Mrs. Fowler nodded, setting her coffee cup aside. Sheldon watched its movement, a feeling of dread beginning to bloom in his stomach.

"There are some things I feel we need to clear the air about. I think it is what Amy would want."

Sheldon pursed his lips, wisely staying silent. He managed to nod his head, but even that was an effort.

"Very well," He said resolutely. He had no idea what this woman knew about him, or their relationship. From the snippets Amy had told him about her mother, theirs wasn't the closest relationship. But the kind way she was she was looking at him made him feel a fraction better.

"Firstly, I want you to know I do not hold any ill feelings concerning the first time we…spoke. I realize Amy was annoyed at my meddling over her love life, and it was her way of putting me in my place. We had a long conversation years ago about that skype incident, and she absolved you of any wrong doing. I know you were being a good friend, adhering to her wishes. I have tended to push Amy to date in the past, but that is only because I don't want her to be alone. Her older sister is happily married with children, and I just don't want her to miss out on those things, if that is her heart's desire. I know her work means the world to her, but as a woman, there comes a time when you long for more."

Sheldon nodded, but inside his heart was thrumming wildly.

_Married? Children? Dear Lord…_

Was this a _'What are your intentions toward my daughter'_ speech? Would Mr. Fowler be showing up at any moment, brandishing a shotgun?

To his credit, Sheldon remained calm, breathing deeply and evenly.

_Offer nothing, Cooper. Reveal nothing. Don't say anything inappropriate. Don't lose your temper._

When Sheldon made no reply to her statement, Mrs. Fowler continued.

"Amy has nothing but glowing words about you and your friends. She is very happy and finally feels accepted in a group. She never had that growing up. She was always highly intelligent, standing head and shoulders above her peers. That made her a bit of an outcast, and a target for ridicule. It was very hard, as her mother, to see her experience such trauma. I don't tell you this to make you feel sorry for her, rather so you know my own intentions as to why she perceived me as meddling. I love my daughter, Sheldon. We are alike in many ways, and in others, not so much. Our differences don't make me love her any less, though. I suppose she is a bit of a loner, and because of that she has suffered over the years," She said sadly, her hand's fiddling with the lid of her coffee cup as a distraction.

Sheldon felt the fault line in his heart split. While he knew this about Amy's childhood, hearing about it from her mother was another story. He could see how sad this made her mother. He ached for his poor Amy… now, and the girl she was then. His mind wandered to ten year old Sheldon, fourteen year old Sheldon, eighteen year old Sheldon…if he had had a friend like Amy growing up, he wondered how different his life would have been.

Was this what one would call fate? Meeting Amy now, rather than then? He often pondered the writings of Samuel Johnson on fate. Was he right? Was fate like an immoveable mountain, standing where man passes away? Does your fate really never change, or do you make your own fate? He didn't find Amy online, Howard and Raj did. He could have refused meeting her, except for that dirty sock blackmail business. Was that fate, too? In choosing to meet her out of selfish purposes, did _he_ choose his fate without knowing?

He knew deep in the marrow of his bones that for whatever reason he and Amy were brought together, it was for something good.

"I can completely relate to that, Ma'am. I too was the object of many a bully due to my intellect. I think that is one of the many reasons Amy and I are so well suited for one another. We understand each other like no one ever has. In many ways, she completes me like no one ever will."

The words were out of his mouth before he could think. Sheldon's eyes shot to Mrs. Fowler's, who was staring at him, steadily.

He may not have stated his intentions outright, but he might as well have. He admitted the intent to be with her, and for Mrs. Fowler, that was enough.

"And you're friends, Sheldon? They accept her into your circle?" She asked curiously.

Sheldon nodded his head in the affirmative.

"My friends," He began, clearing his throat as he pictured them. "My friends love Amy. She integrated into my circle effortlessly. I think they adore her, while they simply tolerate me. My best friend and roommate, Leonard… his girlfriend Penny is particularly fond of Amy. She refers to her as her 'Bestie'."

Mrs. Fowler nodded. "Oh, yes. Penny. She is a sweet girl. I've met her once. Kind of an odd pairing, but I guess stranger things have happened," She offered humorously.

Sheldon thought of Penny's reaction to seeing Amy lying there last night, and knew his blond friend _did_ love his girlfriend.

Returning to the present, he licked his lips.

"Yes…she has been a very positive influence on Amy. More so then I first thought. But the idea has grown on me," He admitted softly.

What he _couldn't_ admit was the reason for the slow progression: the fact he was jealous Amy had someone else in her life to occupy her time.

He had three other friends, with whom he enjoyed numerous hobbies. Yet he somehow felt lonely knowing Amy shared her innermost secrets with Penny, and not with him. When that change occurred, he hardly knew. What a hypocrite, he was. He kept his secret thoughts hidden from her all of the time. And he had the right to feel jealous because she did the same?

Mrs. Fowler sipped her coffee thoughtfully, oblivious to the struggling going on in Sheldon's head. Looking up he met her inquisitive stare, feeling like a specimen under a microscope. He tried to offer what he hoped was a polite smile.

"I can see you care a great deal for my daughter," She said suddenly, startling Sheldon. The smile slid off of his face. He nodded once.

"I feel it's imperative I tell you something, Sheldon. And this is coming from Amy's mother, so you must listen to me. You must not blame yourself that she is ill. I can see you are struggling with guilt. But it is unfounded. You did everything right yesterday. The alternative had you not been there would have been fatal. I owe you a great deal of gratitude. Amy does not trust me the way she trusts you. We never had an ideal relationship, and as an adult, she has grown even more guarded with me. You support her in a way I never could. I've seen a monumental change in my daughter the last few years. She smiles now. She laughs. I have a suspicion you are the reason. I want to thank you for that."

She began to cry softly, reaching inside her purse for a tissue. Sheldon watched, horrified, as the tears fell faster. He had absolutely no skill to handle a crying woman.

"There, there Mrs. Fowler," He said awkwardly, internally rolling his eyes at his poor comforting skills. She discreetly wiped her nose.

"I'm sorry. I am tired as well. And this was not something I was prepared for. I suppose no one ever is."

Sheldon knew that was true. He shook his head, agreeing.

"I meant what I said, though. You saved my daughter. I don't understand why you feel otherwise."

Sheldon looked at his palms resting on the tabletop.

"Because…I didn't…realize she stopped breathing, Mrs. Fowler," He admitted faintly. "I was focusing on keeping her secure because of the seizure, and trying to stop her bleeding. I completely overlooked checking her breathing. How could I have been so remiss?" He whispered, unable to meet her eyes.

At a loss for what to do, Mrs. Fowler risked putting her hand on his. His eyes skimmed over the tangle of fingers to watch as her hand patted his in a motherly fashion.

"Sheldon, you don't give yourself enough credit. Amy was so ill, the doctor said, that if you hadn't been there she would have died. She would have bled to death. You stemmed the tide. For that, you can be grateful. I know I am."

He thought about that a moment.

"But what if the outcome was different? Would you still be here praising me? Or blaming me for allowing your daughter to die," He asked seriously. Mrs. Fowler frowned.

"I would never do that, Sheldon. No matter what, you were there for her… even if you had been too late."

Sheldon huffed, running his hand across his face tiredly. He sat back, eyeing her with what looked like incredulity.

"You're uncomfortable in the position of hero," She stated matter-of-factly. Sheldon did a double take.

"I'm sorry…what?" He asked respectfully, albeit in confusion.

"Well…you are being lauded for saving Amy's life. Yet you continue to feel the opposite, that you are the cause of her illness. You aren't sick yourself, so you didn't give her the strep virus. And you put her in the shower, bringing down her temperature. So I am confused. How exactly _are_ you to blame? You didn't make her sick to begin with."

Her question was a valid, innocent one. How could he tell her the reason for his guilt?

'_Oh, well…you see it's like this…I've been stressing her out for 4 years because she doesn't think I want her physically. Then, I saw a picture of us together the morning after I kissed her for the first time, and I was looking at her like she was heaven on earth, so yeah, I panicked, and tried to avoid her. But my guilt ate away at me, so I, in anger no less, trudged to her apartment to yell at her for making me feel so bad. Got it? By the way, she was near death so I threw her naked into the shower.'_

Sheldon broke out in a cold sweat, placing his head in his hands. He couldn't tell her that. So he settled on a skimmed down version of the truth.

"I should have checked on her sooner. I should have called her earlier. I should have stayed with her that night, after I knew how sick she was. I was…preoccupied. I know I didn't _cause_ her illness. But I could have prevented her illness from escalating the way it did. I will never forgive myself for that," He whispered, looking completely forlorn.

Mrs. Fowler listened patiently to Sheldon's impassioned speech.

"I see," She said, her voice far more understanding than he could bear. Exactly _what_ did she see? He met her gaze, terrified that she could see right through him.

"I will tell you this, Sheldon. And whether or not you believe it is your choice. My daughter is not one to suffer fools gladly. She is very strong. She is extremely selective with whom she shares things. If Amy cares for you as much as I think she does, then there is something wonderful in you worth caring for. I think it behooves you to trust her judgement. Even if you don't trust your own. I'm sure you had your reasons for not contacting her sooner. But she is a big girl; if she needed help, she could have asked for it before she got sicker. You are not to blame here. And I know my daughter. She won't blame you either."

Sheldon's eyes widened at her words, his breath leaving him in a whoosh.

Standing up, Mrs. Fowler carefully picked up her purse and cup, facing him. He looked up, unable to move just yet.

"I need to know something, Sheldon. And please, tell me the truth. Do you love my daughter?"

Sheldon felt the air in the room diminish. He let out a deep gasp at the directness of her question. It reminded him of Amy, when they first met. She pulled no punches then, either. A clear cut line, straight to the heart of the truth. The time had come for him to be honest as well, especially to himself. He was a grown man. He was in love with a grown woman. Admitting it should not be so hard.

"Yes," He said resolutely, staring unwaveringly into Mrs. Fowler's eyes.

The older woman simply nodded, a piteous smile on her lips.

"I'm going back to wait for Amy to return. Thank you for your time, and for the talk," She said quietly, and Sheldon watched her until she disappeared onto the elevator.

The guilt he felt was overwhelming. He had never experienced a feeling like this before. He knew that if he had called Amy Friday morning, and heard her voice, he would have gone to her apartment and taken care of her. She never would have had that seizure, never had run the risk of bleeding to death, and never would have stopped breathing. It was his fear over the fact he had fallen so hard for her and was afraid to face her after seeing that picture that prevented him from doing what he knew he should have.

He appreciated Mrs. Fowler's kind words. But hers wasn't the absolution he needed. Sheldon sat back, staring out of the window to the flowers that lined the garden without seeing anything.

At least an hour passed before Sheldon was able to stand up. As he made his way back to Amy's room in the ICU, he passed a doorway adorned with ornate stained glass. Stopping short, he stood staring at it silently.

There was a gold plate above the door with the word 'Chapel'.

'_They are not meant to open these doors for you…'_

Letting out a sarcastic chuckle, Sheldon turned around and kept walking. One step. Two. Three.

Suddenly, he stopped. Turning around, his shrewd eyes once again located the door. Angrily, he stomped up to it, throwing out his hand to grip the knob. It was unlocked.

'_Looks like this one is, Professor'_, He thought acidly. '_Of course. How ironic_. _The door that opens for me is a Chapel?_

He could almost hear Arthur's words the other night, in the dream that would forever haunt him. What was his mentor playing at, anyway? What in the hell was he doing, leading him_ here_ of all places?

Stepping inside the quiet sanctuary, Sheldon was met with the faint scents of candlewax and incense. He clicked the door shut quietly behind him. The early morning light was strategically hitting the closed door, allowing the prisms of stained glass to cast interesting shadows across the small room lined with pews.

Sitting down in the back, Sheldon stared straight ahead. This was no place for a Physicist. This place of faith, disorderly chaos, and Biblical texts which had no rational meaning in an ordered Universe.

Yet as the seconds passed, the soothing smell coupled with the soft light created a bubble of peace that Sheldon both welcomed and resented.

The Chapel was obviously meant for multiple faiths. There was a Star of David at one end and a marble Cross at the other, ensconced with a statue of Jesus Christ. Sheldon narrowed his eyes as he stared at it.

"You must be shocked to see me here. Or considering the circumstances…maybe not. If you are who You say you are…then you know very well why I'm here. I don't know…whatever…this is madness," He said, his voice trailing off. The longer he stared at the statue, the more uneasy he became.

"I'm not a hypocrite. I don't know what I'm doing here. I am a Scientist. I don't believe in the concept of a deity; I leave that to my mother and her church of holy-roller friends. I don't believe in miracles, either. I have never seen water turned into wine, I've never seen a few fish and some bread feed thousands, and I've never seen anyone walk on water." He spat, rolling his eyes at the very notion of such things even happening.

Suddenly, his arrogance faltered, and he felt tears stinging his eyes. A memory flickered through his mind then; a parable from Sunday school he was forced to endure. It told the story of a man who had great faith. But even faith couldn't stop him from dying. In the end, as a testament to his life and faith, Jesus awarded him a gift.

The man was Lazarus. And his gift? Rising from the dead.

Sheldon chuffed bitterly.

That was completely preposterous. Such a thing could _never, ever_ happen. Ever.

He thought of his girlfriend, lying limp and lifeless one floor below him. She like him, was a Scientist, who didn't believe in this theological nonsense. She may not have been religious, but she was an angel. She may not have been pious, but she was benevolent. She didn't deserve this. If anyone did, it was him. Not her.

He wanted to rant at the injustice of this. He wanted to curse the name of God for even allowing such a thing to occur. But as angry as he was…he couldn't bring himself to do it. He felt broken; like a vessel that had been shot with stone and was cracked in a million places. It would only take one touch to send him disintegrating into dust.

"Why my Amy?" he asked aloud softly, his voice trembling. He knew asking the question was pointless; there was no 'man in the sky' listening; he may as well have asked Santa Claus or the Easter bunny. Yet sitting here, in this sacred space, he felt the yoke of sobriety choke him once again.

Even if there was no 'master plan'… life was still life. And in his structured, ordered Universe….life meant decay and death. He accepted that on a daily basis. He turned a blind eye to it. It was the harsh reality. It simply_ was_.

No rising from the dead. No miracles. No bargaining with God or anyone else.

As life and death happened every day, this was no different. Born in dust, return to dust.

Clinical.

Scientific.

Final.

The trouble was, he couldn't bear to equate Amy to a scientific statistic. She was more than the sum of her parts. She was the entire Universe.

_His_ Universe.

For the first time in his life, Sheldon Cooper felt completely and utterly helpless against the tide of what He could not control. If Amy died…his heart would shrivel and die with her. For she had brought the sunlight, where there was only cold, white mist. She had brought the truth, where he was living in denial. She had brought the laughter, where there was only loneliness. He never really _understood_… just what Amy meant to him. Until he could no longer reach her.

Quiet whimpers left his lips, his head falling forward onto the pew in front of him.

"Please…Help me. I love her so…I would gladly take her place. I don't know if you are there. I doubt you even exist. But if you are…please. Save her. Bring her back to me. The world needs her warmth and brilliance. So much more than it needs mine. I never told her…never showed her what she means to me. It's not fair to her. To have loved me, so unselfishly…and I gave her nothing in return. I can't be the end all of what she gets in this life. She needs more. She deserves more. If you're punishing me now…fine. Bring her back and let her leave me if she chooses. But don't take her from this Earth. It's not her time yet. Do you want me to beg? Then I will beg. And that should please you immensely because Sheldon Cooper never begs. I don't care. I just…love her. Do you hear me? I love her…."

Sheldon cried until he felt he couldn't cry anymore. The light through the window changed the patterns hitting the door. Sheldon watched them through half-mast eyes, exhausted.

His phone rang in the stillness, and he yanked it out of his pocket jerkily. The loud noise felt blasphemous here in this quiet place.

"Hello?" He rasped tiredly.

"Shelly? Its mama, baby. Leonard called me. Are you alright, honey? How is Amy? Dear Lord…the poor sweetheart. I am just beside myself with worry. Do you need me to get on a plane and come to you?"

Mary Cooper posed her questions to Sheldon rapid fire, making his head spin. But hearing his mother's voice had a strange effect on him. The tears began to fall again, faster and faster until they dripped down his chin. He wanted so badly to fall into his mother's comforting embrace, but something inside of him stopped him from demanding she come to him and rescue him from this nightmare. He had to be strong. He had to do this alone. To prove to Amy that he could be a man for her. To prove it to himself.

"Mom…she is very sick. I don't know yet what is happening. They are doing more tests right now."

Mary listened in sadness as her son recounted all that happened yesterday. By the time he was finished, her own tears were falling.

"Oh, dear….that is just…Sheldon, I can be on a plane in a few hours. I don't think you should be alone," She insisted, but Sheldon held firm.

"No mom. I appreciate it, but I must do this by myself. I have my friends. I can't keep expecting you to save me. I have to start saving myself."

"Oh, Sheldon…I am so sorry this happened. That girl is just…she's a gem. I knew the day I met her, she was your soulmate, the one the good Lord made for you."

Sheldon was so raw, the last thing he could listen to now was more religious babble. Especially since he spent the last hour pouring out his soul to a deity he doubted existed.

"Mom, please…not this. Not now. I don't want to talk about the good Lord."

Mary sighed sadly on the other end of the line.

"Sheldon Cooper, don't you sass me. Especially at a time like this. You need the Lord now more than ever. I will have my church pray for your girl tomorrow at service. That is what she needs. Some intervening on her behalf."

Not willing or able to argue, Sheldon closed his eyes. He changed the subject as deftly as he could.

"Mom…how did you cope…when dad, you know…," He stopped abruptly, not sure how to say that word.

He heard Mary's startled gasp.

"That is _NOT_ going to happen, Sheldon. Do you hear me? You have got to keep the faith."

Sheldon rolled his eyes, chuffing angrily.

Faith…good grief.

"Just answer me, mom! How did you go on?" He asked her seriously.

Mary pursed her lips sadly, though Sheldon couldn't see it.

"Sheldon…you just do. You must. That is the circle of life. Not everyone is dealt a perfect hand. Sometimes, the odds are stacked in that deck against you. But you are more fortunate than most; you were born brilliant. You found wonderful friends and a lovely girl who adores you. Hold on to that, Shelly. I know your faith in God isn't strong, but it should be strong in Amy. She is a fighter, that girl. She will find her way back to you. I know it."

Sheldon sighed, biting his lip to prevent the tears from falling again.

"How can you be so sure? She's so…sick. I can't bear it. I can't…" He whispered brokenly.

His mother wanted to be there, comforting him. The only thing she could give him so far away, were words of encouragement.

"Because, Son. You may not have faith, by I do. I have faith in Amy. I have faith in you. And yes… I have faith in God. You must not give in to the darkness, Shelly. You must have hope."

"I'm scared, mom. I can't lose her. She's everything I never knew I needed. What if I never get the chance to make this up to her?" He murmured, trying and failing to imagine a future without her.

"Shelly…calm down, Sweetheart. Listen to your mother. You need to prove to that woman that she has something worthy to comeback to. Do you hear me? Talk to her. Make her see. Sometimes, the fight leaves us when we think it's hopeless. Give her hope, Sheldon. For goodness sake…be the man I _know_ you are."

Sheldon sobered immediately at her chastisement.

"Alright," He said quietly, trying to be strong.

Mary let out a sigh of relief.

"You call me, as soon as you hear anything. And I promise, if you need me, I'll be on the next plane. I love you, Sheldon. I'm very proud of you."

Sheldon smiled, despite everything. His mother was proud of him. Now it was time for Amy to be proud of him, as well.

"Thank you, Mom." He said sincerely.

"Oh, Sheldon…you're welcome, baby. I love you."

He hung his head.

"I love you too."

Disconnecting the call, he stood on rubbery legs. Far too much time had passed. He needed to return to Amy and make sure she was alright. He made his way to the door, but turned around and faced the Cross once again.

He had no idea what to believe or what to do. But the point was, the situation was out of his hands. The most he could do was be strong for his girl. She needed his strength and intelligence now, more than ever. He wouldn't fail her again.

"Faith, Hope, and Love…But the greatest of these is love," He murmured, silently passing through the door and clicking it gently shut.

A/N – A few points…You may have wanted Mary Cooper to come to Sheldon's rescue, but that just won't happen. The whole point of this story is for Sheldon to _grow_. This is something he must do alone. He's had enough coddling. As for his time in the Chapel…my husband pointed out a quote to me. "There are no atheist's in a foxhole". Sheldon is desperate for his Vixen to return to him. And men do strange things when they're desperate. Like pray to deities they don't believe in.

Next Chapter: Our Girl returns.


	12. Chapter 12

~Chapter 12~

A/N – You all continue to amaze and humble me with your reviews and love. I don't know what to say…Someone special asked me to include Sam Smith in a song opener in this story. This chapter is where it fits. This is for you. X

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Yes I do, I believe…That one day I will be, where I was…Right there, right next to you…And it's hard, the days just seem so dark…The moon, and the stars, are nothing without you…Your touch, your skin, where do I begin?...No words can explain, the way I'm missing you…The night, this emptiness, this hole that I'm inside…These tears, they tell their own story…" Sam Smith – Lay Me Down

The cool wind blew the leaves around her like a well- timed dance. The soft sunlight filtered through the billowy clouds, shining on her face and warming her soul from within. Crickets chirped benignly in the distance, and birds tweeted in their perches high above her.

She tried to remember a time she felt so at peace, but no memory was forthcoming. Here, in this perfect place, there were no memories of past or future. Only the present.

All she knew for certain was…she liked it here.

It was peaceful, green, and the quiet rush of the water over the river rocks was extremely soothing. She found herself immersed in the sights and sounds surrounding her like a warm blanket on a cold winter's day.

Leaning back, she rested her head upon the cool, crisp grass. Her eyes scanned Heavenward, watching as a group of larks made their way across the wispy white clouds.

_Is this Heaven?_ She wondered, feeling a strange mixture of elation and regret. The former, because wherever this was, it was the epitome of serenity…and the latter, because she had a feeling that she'd left things, important things…unfinished. And she hated the idea of leaving loose ends.

_Didn't she?_

Someone, somewhere…was calling her. Pulling her. Begging her… For what, she didn't know or understand. She could feel the organ in her chest beating in time with another; the two beats simultaneously synching but performing a symphony she did not recognize. The beat pounded through her, spreading warmth and security through her every cell. If she tried, she could almost reach out and touch it.

But the desire to do that battled with her desire to stay here, lie down, stare at the sky and absorb the beauty.

Her mind was sharp here, but in a completely different way. Although she had the impression she was someone who possessed a great deal of intelligence, her mind refused to conjure up those things of import.

_There is so much to learn. So much to discover…_

A feeling of recognition chased her, gaining ground. She knew that she thought those exact words before, in a dream somewhere.

Was _this_ a dream? It felt altogether too real for a dream. For one, the colors. For another, the sounds. Everything seemed so…perfect. Perhaps_ too_ perfect?

Her head was full of questions. But she pushed them aside; instead, she focused on what she could see and feel, in the here and now.

The blue of the sky. The green of the grass. The brown of the trees. The soft opaque of the water. Vivid, blinding, and very detailed. That's what mattered now. Everything else fell away.

Yet for all of her certainties, she couldn't remember the seemingly small things. Her name. What she looked like. Who loved her, or whom she loved in return. Who was she? And how did she get here?

Her memories, if you could call them that, were hazy reminders of feelings. Not sights. Even though it should have frightened her to be so disconnected, she found it strangely soothing. No choices. No responsibilities. No troubles.

The trees around her rustled in the gentle breeze. She could quite happily stay here in this peaceful place forever, she thought, closing her eyes.

"You wouldn't like it here for very long. There aren't any monkeys."

Her eyes snapped open, and she sat up abruptly. Her eyes fell upon a young girl, perhaps of 12 or 13. She didn't know if she was happy for the newfound company, or sad for the intrusion into her solitude. She narrowed her eyes at the intruder, feeling a strange sense of kinship with her.

"Monkeys?" She questioned in confusion. The girl smiled a secret smile, coming to sit on the grass cross-legged next to her.

"Yes. You love monkeys. You always have. How could you even think of living in a world without them?" She questioned, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

Her confusion deepened.

"How did you know…who are you? Do I know you?" She asked curiously.

The girl giggled, a sweet sound that echoed through the meadow they were sitting in. Her older companion looked around, swearing she could actually _see _the sound.

"You should go home. You don't belong here," She said seriously, ignoring her companion's prior question.

Part of her felt hurt at her dismissal. Who did this kid think she was, anyway? Did she _own_ this meadow?

"Maybe I don't want to go home. Maybe I like it here," She said defiantly, crossing her arms and glaring at the innocent face across from her.

The girl pinched up her lips at the woman's sarcasm, like she never expected such sass to come from her. She smiled again slyly, adding to the woman's growing irritation.

"Nah…you don't _really_ like it here. You may think you do, but it isn't real. You belong back there," She said, pointing to the horizon. The woman followed the trajectory of her finger.

"There? What's there?" She asked in curiosity. Was it possible this youngster knew more than she did?  
The girl scooted over to her, sitting very close. The woman didn't move a muscle. The girl smelled like apples.

Strange…

"Your life is there, Amy. Your _entire_ life. Your _real _life."

Amy gasped, leaning back to stare at the girl.

_Amy_? That was her name?

Amy.

"My life? What is in my life? I don't know what is back there. I don't remember. I don't remember how I got here, either. I just know it's so peaceful. I'm considering staying."

The girl frowned. Amy felt a jolt of pain in her chest at the sad look on her face.

"It _is_ peaceful here, I know. But the peace is an illusion. It's not real; not yet anyway. You aren't meant to be here, now…in this place. If you don't go back, nothing will ever make sense again. And I know you. You _must_ make sense of your surroundings. You would hate it, after a while, not knowing what is real and what isn't. And like I said before…no monkeys. It's rather boring," She threw in, trying to drive home her point.

Amy's eyes drifted around the vast meadow. It looked real enough. But could she trust her instincts? Or this child who didn't seem real herself.

"How long have _you_ been here?" She asked instead, eyeing the girl with suspicion. The girl lowered her eyes, tracing patterns of the grass with her finger.

"I've always been here," She said, offering no other explanation.

Amy balked at the girls answer. _Always?_ That would be impossible.

"How do you know my name? I don't remember meeting you. Do we know each other?"

The girl nodded her head, and Amy got the distinct impression she was disappointed in her somehow. Why did that make her sad?

"I know everything about you, Amy. The good, and the bad. For instance…I know what you used to dream about when you were a child. I know about those nightmares you have been having lately. And I know what you threw into the water that day on the beach in Nantasket. I was there."

Amy scrambled away from the girl, rising on unsteady legs.

"You…saw that? But, how? You weren't even _born_ yet. Who_ are_ you? " She demanded.

The girl rose as well, her posture open and non-threatening. She stepped closer to Amy.

"I can't tell you who I am, Amy. But just know…I am someone who loves you. Someone who always watched over you. Someone who was there for every achievement, heartache, and joy you ever experienced. And I will be there, until the day you breathe your last. But today _isn't _that day."

Amy's confusion deepened.

"I don't understand. What happened to me? And how did you know about that bottle?"

The girl walked ahead a few paces, leaning against the tree that engulfed the entire meadow. Its trunk was massive, its limbs reaching outward towards eternity. Its green leaves floating in the wind, creating the most beautiful symphony of whistles and sighs.

"You let yourself float away. You didn't look out below. You gave into your fears. You didn't have faith. Trust. Hope. You let your past dictate your future. You jumped off the edge of forever. You gave up," She said simply, but with so much devastation that Amy swallowed the heavy lump in her throat.

"Gave up? What did I give up? I don't know what you mean." She whispered.

"I have faith in you, Amy. I _know_ you can do this. I'm trusting you."

Amy rubbed her eyes wearily. They hurt all of a sudden. Something was trying to force its way out of them.

"Trusting me? But…why? What do I have to do with you?"

The girl stared at Amy, unflinching. It was unnerving.

"I know your secret fears, Amy. Of never being good enough. Never measuring up. Always being one step behind. I know your worries. I know about _him_. Remember him, Amy.

_Remember_.

"Him?" She echoed, trying desperately to comprehend what this girl was telling her.

"Yes…him. The one who is searching for you. Calling out to you. Your other half. He's blind, Amy. He is so lost without you. He needs you. You have always been the strong one. You've taught him so much. But you aren't finished. If you leave…he will never reach the heights he is destined for. Nor will you."

Amy backed up, stumbling over the grass. The girl watched her with compassionate eyes, unable to help her. She had to do this on her own. It was painful to watch. But still…she had faith.

"He…."

The girl jutted her chin, prompting Amy to continue.

"He…he doesn't like monkeys as much as I do. He likes…koalas." Amy said in wonder, her eyes looking far behind into her past.

The girl smiled, her lips stretched wide across her teeth.

"Yes….Yes. He _loves_ koalas," She said, pleased. "But not as much as he loves _you_."

Amy's eyes widened dramatically, coming back to her companions in recognition.

_Loves?_

The girl watched as the realization dawned on Amy's face.

'_The only conclusion was love…'_

"He…loves me." She said, as though trying to work out the puzzle pieces and make them fit. The girl stood still, waiting.

"I left him. I…I couldn't hang on. I tried. I did. But the pull was too strong. I was so tired. I couldn't stay."

The girl smiled sadly.

"I know. I was there, too."

Amy stared at the girl, saddened that she had to witness such a terrible event.

"You were?"

The girl nodded slowly. "Yes. It was…horrible. I tried to help you hang on. But you couldn't because you were drowning. I tried to throw you a lifeline. I lit the sky with color, so you'd see. But you were falling. Drifting. And then…I couldn't find you."

Amy searched her mind. Yes…there. The color was all around. His eyes. His blue, blue, startling blue eyes. Yes…bluer than the sky. Bluer than the sea.

Blue…everywhere.

"You did that? You sent that color?" She whispered, amazed.

The girl nodded, her eyes beginning to well.

"I did. For you. If that truly was your time, then the last thing I wanted you to see was him."

'_Don't leave me…'_

Oh…but I did leave. Amy wiped the tear that had fallen.

"Are you an Angel?" She whispered reverently. "Am I…is this…am I dead?" She wondered, terrified to hear her fears confirmed.

The girl shook her head rapidly, compassion etched on her face.

"No, Amy. You're not dead. You're just…asleep. You've been asleep a very long time. It's time to wake up. It's time to start living. Time to begin again. You _will_ begin again. And it will be even better than before. I know. I've been _there_, too."

"Where is _there_?" She asked, desperately needing guidance.

The girl took her hand gently, turning it over in her palm. Amy noticed they had the same fingers. The same nails. The same heart line. Life line. Her eyes met this child's…so green. So incredibly green. Like the meadow that surrounded them. Like the leaves on the tree above them.

"Your future, Amy. Yours. And his. It's beautiful. I can't tell you. I can't. But you'll see. You'll see, and you'll believe. And it will be…magical."

_Magical_…the word echoed across the wind, pushing pleasurably against Amy's eardrums.

"But how can you know?_ I_ don't even know. I'm afraid," She admitted, shakily.

"I know you are. But you don't have to be. Because I can tell you this: You are not alone. There are people waiting for you that love you.

"They…they do? Really?"

The girl smiled and leaned down, touching Amy's hand with her lips. Amy closed her eyes, feeling the love surround her.

"Yes. They do. _He_ does. You'll see. Go home, Amy. They're waiting for you. _He's_ waiting for you."

Amy sniffled, trying to collect herself. It was amazing, the wisdom this young girl possessed.

"Will we meet again, you and me? Will I…remember you?" She asked her tentatively. The thought of never seeing her again grieved her.

The girl stared at her blankly, shaking her head.

"I don't think so. But it doesn't matter. I will always be with you."

Amy nodded, a feeling of finality blooming in her heart. Something deep inside told her that this was meant to be.

"That's good to know. Thank you." She said sincerely. The girl closed her eyes, her lower lip trembling.

"You're welcome."

The girl took a step, when Amy held out her hand.

"May I ask you a question, before you go?"

The girl nodded, smiling serenely.

"You may."

"Did...did my bottle ever reach another shore?"

The girl's eyes glazed over, looking at something beyond Amy's shoulder. There was no smile on her face, now, but no frown either. Amy waited silently for her to answer.

"It did." She said simply. "It's buried someplace safe, where no eyes can reach it. Waiting."

Amy breathed a sigh of relief. Good. That was good. At least it didn't get lost at sea.

She sat back down on the cool grass as the girl walked away, waving to her. Little by little, her shadow faded in the soft sunlight, until she was a barely recognizable glimmer.

Amy closed her eyes, trying to gather her senses.

Trying to remember.

Time passed. So much time. Flowing in, and flowing out. Like a river.

Like the water that was flowing over the rocks in the stream beside her.

She sat there, staring at the water, listening to eternity. The sounds so clearly etched inside her head.

Help me remember…

"Your name is Amy. Amy Farrah. Amy Farrah Fowler. Yes…" She whispered, trying desperately to remember who it was Amy Farrah Fowler is. Brown hair. Green eyes. Beckoning pelvis…

'_You used to lie in bed, watching shadows on the wall. Dreaming of the future and what you could make of it…you had such plans…_

'_You are a Scientist in the field of Neurobiology. You graduated with honors from Harvard University._ _You are a published writer in Science journals._ Yes. Yes…" She reiterated, swallowing and trying to calm herself.

'_You were walking on a beach, hand in hand, with the love of your life…his eyes. So blue. Bluer than the sky. Bluer than the sea beside you. Remember…'_

"You are in love with a man. Another Scientist. His name is…Sheldon. Sheldon Lee. Sheldon Lee Cooper." She sobbed, the mentioning of his name conjuring up his dear, sweet face. Tears began to form in her verdant eyes immediately, as the overwhelming love she felt for him began to infiltrate her being.

'_Don't do this, Amy. Don't you do this. Stay with me. I can't do this alone. Don't leave me…_'

"Oh, God…Oh my God…Sheldon. Where are you? I heard you. I felt you. Where are you now? I need you, Sheldon. Save me, please," She cried, desperate to reach him. "I don't know how to find you. I'm lost…I'm so alone. I need you," She wept, the blue sky above and the green grass below disappearing from her view. All that was left, was white light. Stark, white space.

So the girl was right. It was all an illusion. What was real was what she left. Where Sheldon was.

_How will I ever get back?_

Fear gripped her heart for a split second. Until she heard something beautiful echoing through the expanse.

'_Amy…you were right. It does get better….because it 'did'. _She heard through the quiet air, that sweet voice so melodious and happy.

Oh, my God…

Amy was rooted to the spot, her mind in a vortex.

'_A guest in my trundle bed and a boy at my door. I wish I could tell my 13 year old self that it does get better.'_

She is me.

"She _is_ me…"

'_I've seen the future. Yours. And his…'_

Hope like she'd never felt before began to dawn inside of her. She began to cry harder, but that only set her resolve stronger.

"I want to go home. Please…let me go home," She whispered, closing her eyes and rocking back and forth.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

One day bled into another, and then another. Before Sheldon knew it, another Friday was here.

A week had passed, and Amy had progressed from critical to stable. She still wasn't well enough to breathe on her own, but on Wednesday, Dr. Preston felt Amy was strong enough to be taken out of her barbiturate coma. They were slowly reversing the effects of the Phenobarbital, resulting in her brain function to begin returning to a more cognizant state. The Dr. assured Sheldon that she would eventually awaken on her own, when her body was ready. He could only place his trust in medical science now. And something else inside of him that he couldn't explain.

Her pneumonia had almost vanished; the myriad of medication pumping through her system doing its job, as was the ventilator helping her breath.

Day after day he sat with her, watching her and speaking to her. Telling her about their friends. About what was playing on the TV in her room.

About everything and nothing at all.

He read to her, stories of poetry. Chaucer, her favorite. Comic books, his favorite. He bought a Thor comic book in the hospital gift shop. She liked Thor.

The University was very sorry to hear about Amy. President Siebert graciously gave Sheldon a six week sabbatical if necessary, and assured Sheldon he would see to it personally that Amy was granted full medical leave. Sheldon was touched as he spoke to his boss on the phone. Leonard of course had been a big help, smoothing over the edges before he himself had spoken to him.

Mrs. Fowler had been by every day to see Amy and check her progress. A few times, Sheldon took her down to the cafeteria for lunch, or dinner if the hour called for it. Sheldon was growing tired of hospital cuisine. _This_ is what they gave people and expected them to recover? A strongly worded email would be sent as soon as he could to the hospital administrator.

It was in these visits of sitting there with his girlfriend's mother, the pair of them sharing silence or on occasion, small talk about their lives, that Sheldon realized how selfish he had been to Amy. For better or worse, this was her family. He had purposely excluded himself from their midst, resulting in Amy being hurt and embarrassed at showing up for family events alone. She never complained, putting up with his strange quirks. It grieved him now to think of how many times he had let her down.

Their friends had been a source of comfort and strength in the past few days. After Amy returned last Saturday from her tests, Sheldon made his way to the ICU lounge and found the entire group sitting there where Nurse Dana said they'd be. Raj and Emily, Howard and Bernadette, and Leonard and Penny. They sat in a circle, sad looks upon their faces, holding hands and whispering quietly. Sheldon stopped in the entranceway, staring at them for a few moments unguarded. They were his family now. He was so lucky to have them. He vowed to never take them for granted again.

It was Howard who looked up first, noticing Sheldon. Their eyes met, and the compassion he saw in Howard's eyes was enough to render him mute.

Without hesitation, Howard rose and walked over to his friend-the friend it had taken him years to form an alliance with, and wrapped his arms around him in a brotherly hug. Sheldon stood motionless for a moment, shocked and too touched to move. Eventually he came to his senses, and threw his arms around Howard tightly.

Everyone began to cry silently, before rising and joining them. Linking arms around one another, they surrounded Sheldon with love and support. Never in his life had Sheldon been part of such a hug. It was overwhelming in its magnitude.

Sheldon leaned his head down on Howard's shoulder. He didn't care how stupid he looked. He didn't care that there were a million germs floating in the airspace between the two of them. All he cared about was that he needed these people, and they were here.

The seven of them sat down, and they waited patiently for Sheldon to recount what had happened the day before. He was more articulate, composed, and calmer than he was last night, and Leonard breathed a sigh of relief.

Something had changed in his friend. Something he couldn't explain or even describe. But it was there. Like in the way he carried himself; so different from last night when he found him on the floor, devastated. Or the tone of his voice. His usual haughty inflection had been replaced with a quiet reverence.

They all spotted it; after all, how could you not? His very aura had been altered irrevocably.

Over the course of the week, they had one by one stopped by to see Amy, and sat with her. It pained Sheldon to leave her side for these private meetings. But he was grateful and touched that they loved her so much.

It was nearing 11 pm, and Nurse Dana would be arriving soon for the night shift. Sheldon was very grateful she had taken such good care of Amy for the last week. He would have to bring her his Meemaws cookies as a thank you. He was certain Amy would agree with him.

Sheldon had held Amy's hand tightly, watching her closely for the last hour. He found his girlfriend to be a fascinating creature, holding endless allure for him. Even in sleep, he marveled at her beauty. The complexities of her brain called to him like no other ever could. What was going through her beautiful mind? Where was she? What was she experiencing?

How he missed her…he wanted nothing more than for her open her eyes and challenge him to a rousing game of counterfactuals.

"We missed date night last night," He said quietly, caressing her fingers with his own. "You owe me one, now…we'll have to make it up when you get better. We can return to that restaurant on the beach, if you like. Or we can find another."

He thought back to last Thursday, and their drive to Santa Monica. Closing his eyes, he could see her so clearly, smiling at him from the other side of the car as they drove along the Pacific Coast Highway.

He wanted to smile again. He wanted to smile again at _her_. And have her return it, full of life and love. Her beautiful lips…they deserved to smile. They lit up the world.

Sheldon scooted closer to her, running one hand through her soft hair. The ICU was quiet, the nurses off doing their rounds. Sheldon could hear a pin drop. Leaning closer to Amy, he whispered to her the words he had been putting off for a week. The words his mother prompted him to say. Because he knew…it was time.

"I am so sorry I failed you. You are too good for me. Always were, always will be. The truth is…I'm nothing without you, Dr. Fowler. Nothing. I've been running from you for so long because I knew that. I _knew_ it. And I couldn't face it. What if…what if I'm not enough? I know you could do better than me. I may be brilliant…but I'm a fool. And a fool doesn't deserve a Princess. But this fool… he needs you. More than anything. Please…Come back to me, Amy. I miss you so much," He whispered, leaning over and laying his head over hear heart gently.

Her heart beat strong and sure in his ear, a comforting reminder that although her lungs weren't back to normal yet, her heart was healthy. The whoosh of her heartbeat lulled him, beckoned him. He stared into space, beginning to nod off.

He was certain he was dreaming already when he felt it.

A hand gently touched the nape of his neck, weakly stroking through the hair there. Sheldon bolted up, lightning fast, his eyes snapping open as they fixed upon Amy frantically.

He almost fainted as Amy's green eyes stared drowsily into his. The air completely left him as he moved closer to her, clutching her hand as gently as he could.

"A-Amy? Can you hear me?" He said fervidly, his voice pleading. She didn't answer him; couldn't answer him. Not with the intubation tube down her throat. But she blinked at him, her silky lashes fluttering slowly. The relief Sheldon felt couldn't be measured. No stranger lately to weeping, he began anew, barely able to keep himself together.

"Oh...Amy," He cried, falling on her chest and allowing the sobs to overtake him. She was awake. She was here. His Amy…his beautiful Amy.

Sheldon reached over, hitting the nurse's button quickly in case Amy drifted off again. Dana came running into the room, ready for anything. When she spied Sheldon holding Amy gently and crying, she feared the worst.

"Dr. Cooper-"

"She's awake! She opened her eyes," He cut her off, his voice quivering. Dana rushed over, checking Amy's vitals. She shined a light in Amy's eyes, all the while Sheldon sat back with his heart in his throat.

Dana smiled as she clicked of the light.

"Well, well…someone has decided to join us," She said warmly, reaching down to take Amy's wrist to physically check her pulse. She looked up at Sheldon who was holding her hand tightly.

"Dr. Cooper? May I?" She asked kindly, nodding to Amy's hand clutched inside his. Sheldon reluctantly let her go.

"Her pulse is stronger. Still weak, but out of the danger zone."

Sheldon closed his eyes, burying his face in his hands while Dana assessed her patient.

"Amy? Can you understand me? Blink once for yes." She said with assertion. Amy blinked once and Dana smiled.

"Good. Good girl, Amy. You are alright. You're at Pasadena General and we're taking care of you. Don't be afraid. You're going to be fine. I know you're confused, but try to remain calm. Your boyfriend Sheldon is here. He will stay with you while I go get Dr. Preston. Okay?"

Amy blinked once again, her gaze drifting slowly to Sheldon. He couldn't speak, he was too overcome with joy and relief. He gazed at her with such love, such intensity…he thought he'd collapse under the weight of it.

Dr. Preston rushed into the room, followed by Dana. He was anxious to see Amy. His eyes met Sheldon's briefly before focusing on his patient.

"Hello, young lady. I see you've decided to come back to us. I'm Dr. Preston. Can you understand me, Amy? Blink once if you can." He said gently, and Sheldon let out the breath he held as Amy complied. Dr. Preston smiled softly.

"Very good, Amy. I want you to remain as calm as you can. You are safe. You suffered a serious trauma. But you are much better and we're taking good care of you. I'm going to send for the Neurologist to examine you. I will be right back, alright?" He asked, squeezing her hand tenderly. Amy blinked again before closing her eyes.

Dr. Preston turned to Dana and spoke in hushed tones.

"Give her 2 mg of Ativan in her IV; we want to keep her calm while she has the breathing tube in. I'll order a full assessment for her immediately."

Nurse Dana nodded, her eyes landing on Sheldon as the Dr. exited.

"Dr. Cooper? I'm going to bring Amy a light sedative to keep her calm. I need you to sit with her and keep her company, okay?"

Sheldon blinked at the nurse as though she were an alien.

_Okay? Was she crazy? He'd stay with her forever._

"Yes. Of course I will," He whispered, his gaze swinging back to his beloved.

She was staring at him drowsily, her green eyes focused on him so intently.

"Amy…" He whispered softly, sitting beside her and bringing her hand to his face. She didn't pull away. She sluggishly moved her fingers, caressing his cheek. The tears wouldn't stop falling now. He didn't care.

His Amy…who knew him better than anyone and loved him regardless.

His Little Lump of Wool…who was everything warm and giving in this life.

His Vixen…the perfect mix of temptress and nurturer.

God…how he loved her.

A/N – So…I'm spent now. I know I updated this morning, but I just _had_ to post this for you all. Now, the healing can begin. Next chapter: middle of next week. X


	13. Chapter 13

~Chapter 13~

A/N – Thank you to everyone for the reviews, PM's, and love. To think I've touched you so deeply makes me cry. Seriously. I know it's been an emotional road. But happier times are ahead soon.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I've never made promises lightly…and there have been some that I've broken…but I swear in the days still left, we'll walk in fields of gold…" Sting – Fields of Gold

Sheldon listened anxiously to Dr. Preston and the Pulmonologist as they prepared to remove Amy's breathing tube. As they talked quietly about the impending procedure, his eyes strayed over to his girlfriend.

Outwardly, she seemed calm. Except for her wide eyes which were darting around the room. He wished he could spare Amy from this discomfort; but he knew as soon as it was over, she would feel much better. He was desperate to hear her sweet, husky voice again. It had been 10 days since she had spoken to him, and the wait was killing him.

After she awoke on Friday night, there was a whirlwind of activity. Specialist upon Specialist filtered their way into Amy's room, wheeling machines and carts behind them. At one point, they asked him to vacate the room so they could assess her. He nearly had a panic attack, until they assured him it was standard procedure and she was going to be fine. He stumbled into the ICU lounge, sitting down and trying to remain calm.

"_She's fine. She's awake. Everything is okay,"_ He repeated to himself, over and over. He took deep, steadying breaths and focused on the memory of her eyes. Her beautiful green eyes….

Opened, finally. Looking into his with so much…emotion.

Where had she been, for so very long? Did she remember him? Did she try to find her way back to him? Or was she oblivious to everything? He hoped she hadn't suffered any more while asleep. The thought of her alone and frightened tore his heart to shreds.

He took out his phone to call Leonard, when he noticed the time.

12:27 am.

It was much too late to disturb him and Penny. Putting his phone away, he took another deep breath. It was better this way, anyhow. He wanted to savor this moment, alone. He would call them in the morning, after he knew more about her condition.

Hours passed before Nurse Dana returned to retrieve him, her face a mask of placid happiness. Despite that, Sheldon rose quickly and was on alert.

"She's alright, Dr. Cooper," She reassured him gently.

Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat.

"She is?" He asked hesitantly, and Dana smiled.

"Yes. Dr. Preston and the Pulmonologist on staff tonight, Dr. Moore, have decided Amy can have her breathing tube removed Sunday morning. We've given her a sleeping aid tonight to keep her calm. We'll keep her sedated through tomorrow as well. It is highly uncomfortable for her to be aware of it in her throat, as you may imagine. You may go back in, but she's already asleep."

Sheldon had nodded in relief, letting out the tremendous breath in his lungs.

"Did you…were you able to communicate with her? Is her memory intact? She's a Neurobiologist, you know. Her work-"

Dana waved a hand reassuringly in his direction.

"Dr. Cooper, she was examined by Neurology and they found nothing long term wrong with her or her memory. She answered their questions through blinking and she was coherent. Other than the normal recovery time for a head trauma, I'm sure her mind is intact. Please, try not to worry. She needs you now more than ever to be strong."

Sheldon nodded solemnly.

"Alright."

Dana walked with him back to Amy's room in the ICU. It seemed to take a millennia. When he entered, his eyes greedily drank in her small frame. He stared at her for endless moments, not able to believe she was truly back. Finally, he could take no more. He closed his eyes as a wave of gratitude swept over him.

She looked different, somehow. More…alive? That was strange; after all, the breathing tube was still assisting her. But Sheldon could feel it. Sitting by her side once again, taking her soft hand in his own, he felt it instantly.

Her hand felt…_warmer_.

Suddenly it hit him, like a pile of giant jenga blocks.

It was her _Spirit_. It was what was missing all of these days. And now, it was back here. Where it belonged.

With him.

He'd never felt such love as he did in that moment. Her life force had returned, and it was all around him. He lowered his head to her hand, weeping silently at all he could have lost. And all that he had gained.

"Amy, we're going to remove your endotracheal tube now. First we will suction out the tube and your mouth for any secretions, and then we will let the cuff down in order to remove it. I want you to remain as calm as possible. Try to relax your throat and try not to swallow. It will be over quickly. Can you do that for me?"

The Dr.'s firm instruction snapped Sheldon back to the present, his eyes taking in the scene with concern as he tried to stay out of everyone's way.

Amy blinked at Dr. Preston, nodding once. The last couple of days he had been very kind to her, coming in often to check on her and giving Sheldon kind words of encouragement. She was going to miss his gentle bedside manner, but the idea of being moved out of ICU was highly appealing.

Amy glanced to her left, her weary eyes meeting Sheldon's. He looked frightened for her and reached over, softly taking her hand in his own.

"Is it alright if I stay here with her, and hold her hand?" He asked timidly, and Dr. Preston smiled gently.

"Yes Dr. Cooper. In fact, I think it would be best. But I would like for you stand at her side, and help her sit up if possible."

Sheldon immediately scrambled the short distance over, his long legs carrying him to Amy's side. Amy wanted to smile at the fact he never let go of her hand the entire time. She was so afraid; but with him here, she could do this. Sheldon wrapped his arm around her shoulder, securing her up further into the pillow.

"Are you comfortable?" He whispered tenderly in her ear, and Amy nodded. The sound of his voice sent pleasurable shivers down her spine.

Sheldon looked back to Dr. Preston and Nurse Dana with trepidation.

"Will this hurt her?" He asked fearfully, and both patient and boyfriend glued their eyes to Dr. Preston.

The Dr. tried to reassure them as best he could.

"No, it shouldn't. It might be a little uncomfortable. And there will probably be some soreness of the throat. That is perfectly normal, Amy, so don't fear any damage was done. You will feel a slight pressure, but it will soon stop. Just relax. That is the key. Hold your boyfriends hand, and relax your mind and body. You're in good hands, "He said with confidence, smiling and putting her at ease. Amy squeezed Sheldon's hand to let him know it was alright. She loved him all the more as his hand tightened almost painfully in hers. She wondered if he was more afraid than she was.

"I've got you," Sheldon whispered in her ear again. Amy closed her eyes at how his voice made her feel so secure.

"Alright, Amy…now take a deep breath through your nose, and as you blow it out, relax your throat. On the count of three. One…two…three."

Dr. Preston was right. It _was_ uncomfortable. Amy winced as the tube was pulled out of her throat, closing her eyes against the pinching and pressure. She wanted to cry from the strange sensation; her eyes prickled and watered, and she began to cough and gag uncontrollably once she felt the plastic pass her lips.

"It's alright, Amy. It's all over now. Can you take a deep breath for me?" Dr. Preston asked, checking her monitor for her vitals. He looked satisfied and came to stand on her other side after taking off his latex gloves and washing his hands. Sheldon still held fast to her hand, refusing to let go.

Amy took a deep breath, her lungs clearer but still weak. Dr. Preston checked them with a stethoscope, noting the fluid was almost gone and there were no more rails.

"Well, it looks like your lungs have responded well to the antibiotics. There is still some fluid, but the crackles are gone. You are very lucky. I will order a chest x ray for this morning, to gauge your progress. You will have to spend another day or so in ICU while we do aggressive breathing treatments for you. We don't want you to have a relapse. Do you have any questions, my Dear?"

Amy shook her head.

"How are you feeling otherwise? Any dizziness or disorientation? You hit your head very hard. Are you having any side effects from the concussion you sustained?"

Amy tried to get her bearings, sitting up further and trying to get comfortable. Sheldon realized her discomfort and immediately helped her by fluffing her pillows and positioning her delicately. Dr. Preston watched the couple and smiled. He waited patiently for her to compose herself.

"No…" She rasped, using her voice for the first time. The effort made her dizzy, but she knew that was normal.

Dr. Preston came over, taking her hand in his. He patted it reassuringly.

"Good. Dr. Fowler…you went through a terrible ordeal. Luckily, the streptococcus infection did not reach the lining of your heart. You need to rest now, as much as possible. I'll be by tonight during rounds to check on you. In the meantime, I'll order those breathing treatments."

Amy nodded, offering him a weak smile.

Once everyone left the room and they were alone, Sheldon turned to face Amy fully. Her eyes were warm as they gazed into his. He swallowed thickly.

A week ago, he wasn't sure he would even look into her eyes again. The thought left him breathless. He sat down by her side, taking her hand in his own and placing it again on his cheek. Sheldon closed his eyes at the feeling of her warm palm touching his skin. He wanted to weep in pleasure and relief.

"Sheldon-…" She rasped, and he shook his head rapidly.

"Don't Amy…just…let me look at you. I need to know you are really here," He whispered, his voice faltering. He opened his eyes and gazed at her with intensity.

Amy had never seen him look at her like that before. It left her feeling naked. As though every thought she had was stripped bare.

"I missed you…so much," He whispered brokenly, tears gathering in his blue eyes.

_Those eyes…_

Her anchor and her safe harbor. She'd gone through the fire, but those eyes surrounded her with safety. She stroked his cheek, wondering at the stubble there. How long had it been since he'd shaved?

"You…saved my life, Sheldon. How can I thank you for what you did for me?" She whispered, her voice scratchy and soft. Sheldon could only stare at her, dumbfounded.

"It was you…I heard someone talking to me through the haze of it all. I thought I was dying, or had already died. But it was your voice I heard. You knew just what to do to save me. You never let me go. I felt your arms around me, holding me tightly. I heard…Chaucer. In my head. That was you…wasn't it? You were there."

Sheldon lowered his head, too choked up to speak. He shook his head, turning away.

"Yes…I was there. I thought- I didn't think you'd hear me. I was so frightened that you were gone." He whispered.

Suddenly, he got up and began to pace the floor slowly. Amy watched him, not knowing if it were possible to love him any more than she already did. He was here. And he'd been here all along. He saved her.

"Sheldon?" She wheezed quietly, and he winced at her weakened voice.

How could he tell her that he blamed himself?

"Amy…please. Don't thank me. I am the one to blame. It's my fault you are here now. I almost lost you and it's _all_ my fault."

Amy narrowed her eyes in confusion.

"What are you talking about?" She rasped.

Sheldon shook his head, ashamed.

"I should have called you sooner. I should have stayed with you Thursday night. But I left you. And I was almost too late. When I found you unconscious and convulsing…Amy…Oh, God…please forgive me. Forgive me," He begged.

Sheldon began to sob, lowering his head into his hands as he turned his back on her. Amy's heart broke for him; she'd seen Sheldon emotional on a few occasions, but never to this degree. She knew finding her in the state she was in probably frightened him to death.

"Sheldon? Please look at me," she whispered, unable to raise her voice. The sound of her struggling only made him weep harder. He hated himself for his weakness, especially in front of Amy. He'd been to hell and back in the last seven days, and his mind was unable to cope any longer. He had failed Amy before, and he was failing her now, by not being the strong man she needed and deserved.

"Please, Sheldon. Look at me." Her tone was stern.

He turned around, his wet rimmed eyes hesitantly meeting hers. Amy's lip quivered as they stared at one another. Silently, she held out her hand for him, and to her great relief, he grasped it.

"I am so sorry I allowed myself to get as sick as I did. I should have known it was bad when I couldn't get out of bed to get some water. I should have called you then. I should have called 911 then. It was wrong of me to endanger my life, and put you in the position that I did. I'm a Scientist. I know better."

Sheldon's eyes widened in shock.

"Amy! No! I refuse to let you blame yourself for being sick." He said maniacally, shaking his head back and forth in anger.

Amy wouldn't hear of it, though.

"And I refuse to let _YOU_ blame yourself for something you couldn't control. I'm a grown woman, not a child. I didn't take the warning signs seriously. If you think you're to blame, then I share the blame with you."

He hung his head. "Amy…you can't let me off the hook here. I was a terrible boyfriend. You have no idea how upset I was with you for not answering my calls that morning. I hate myself for what I was thinking." He said guiltily.

Amy closed her eyes, sighing.

For the first time in their relationship, Sheldon was taking the blame for something. She should have been happy. Instead, it left _her_ with a feeling of guilt. As imperfect as Sheldon was, the fact he did come to her rescue proved he loved her. It proved he saved her. If he hadn't come, she might be dead.

"Sheldon…Dr. Preston told me yesterday just how bad I was. He said you stayed with me, 24-7 for the last week. He said you were devastated and they almost sedated you. I might be dead now if you hadn't come to my apartment. No matter what…you saved my life. I don't care how it happened. I'm just grateful it did."

Sheldon stared at her, speechless. Amy's mother had been right. She _didn't_ suffer fools gladly, that was for certain. Above everything else he was feeling at the moment - gratitude, relief, shame, and guilt…one emotion forced its way ahead of the rest.

Pride.

This was _HIS_ woman. His strong, remarkable woman. He had learned so much from her, and he wasn't finished yet. She would break him before his studies were finished.

He was looking forward to it.

Their eyes met in stalemate. He could have wept for how the fire in her eyes made him feel. That fire he loved so desperately, it was back.

Taking a deep, cleansing breath, he made his way back to her.

"Enough of this. You need your rest. I'm sorry. No more stressing you out; you've been through hell. Please…lie back and relax." He implored, gently coaxing her to do as he asked. She had used her voice enough this morning. He had no right to cause her any more pain.

Amy settled in, with Sheldon sitting by her side. He leaned over and gently took her head, laying it on his chest. The weight of it there felt like Heaven.

"Amy…" He whispered helplessly, lost in her scent and her nearness. "I love you."

Amy's eyes drifted shut, relishing the feeling coursing through her. She thought she would never again feel his warmth. See his face. Look into his eyes…or hear those words again from his sweet lips. She could have replied with an 'I love you' as well. Because it was there, so deep, in every gifted breath she took.

But somehow…she knew that wasn't what Sheldon needed to hear. He needed to hear something that told him she understood. That she had missed him, longed for him.

Forgave him.

For whatever it was he thought he was guilty of.

She relaxed, letting the sedatives in her blood lull her into peace. And said the two words that she knew would get through to him.

"I know."

Sheldon tilted his head back in shock. He looked down at her profile, at her long lashes sweeping her cheeks. And he could have sworn she was smiling.

Joy heretofore unimagined coursed through him. Sheldon pulled her tighter against him, overcome.

Now she was using Star Wars quotes against him?

He was in _so_ much trouble.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The next two days progressed as expected; Amy was a model patient who did everything she was told.

The breathing treatments had left her shaky and with a racing heart, but it felt good to _feel_ again at all. They had moved her out of ICU into a private room, and for that she was grateful.

Without the aid of the ventilator, she was now coughing much more. But the fact her lungs were almost clear helped. She longed for the day this was completely over. But Dr. Preston was right; she was young and strong, and her recovery was progressing as it should.

Sheldon was there, through every moment. She finally ordered him to go home and see to personal matters for a while so he could get some fresh air. She wondered if he had been inside the whole of her stay here. He promised her he would be back within two hours. He didn't want to leave her at all.

Penny had texted her, writing how much everyone missed her. She said she'd be by that evening after work. Amy smiled as she thought how nice it would be to see her girls again. She was more than ready to leave this place and return back to her life. A girl's night seemed to be in her immediate future.

A gentle rap on the door startled her.

"Dr. Fowler?"

Amy groggily looked toward the doorway, expecting a nurse with another round of breathing treatments or IV fluids. As much as she was grateful for the round the clock care she was receiving, all of the poking and prodding was taking its toll on her fragile body.

The soft voice didn't belong to a Nurse or a PA, though. Instead, she saw a beautiful Hispanic woman, with a sleek black bob and skin the color of caramel dressed in black jeans and a pink sweater. The woman smiled at Amy, hovering in the doorway seemingly unsure if she should enter.

"Yes?" Amy rasped, sitting up in bed to greet her visitor who came to her bedside, but kept a respectable distance.

"Good morning, Dr. Fowler. My name is Vivian Ramirez. I'm one of the EMT's that worked on you at your home a couple of weeks ago."

Amy perked up, sitting up further and attempting to smooth down her hair. She knew she must look frightful, and after several passes through the tangled mass, she decided it was a lost cause. She gave the stranger a small, shy smile, which Vivian returned.

"Hello. I wasn't aware EMT's made bedside calls," She said in good humor, her deep voice sounding brittle due to the recently removed intubation tube.

Vivian smiled wider, coming closer and motioning to the chair by the bedside.

"May I?" She asked, to which Amy nodded enthusiastically.

"Please, have a seat."

"Thank you. I don't usually visit patient's I've treated, but I found out you were still here and wanted to check on you. How are you feeling? And how is that head?" She asked kindly.

Amy thought about that a moment.

"Better. The stitches are coming out next week. But I still feel a little weak."

Vivian nodded sympathetically.

"That is to be expected, Dr. Fowler. After what you endured, it's perfectly normal. But you look a hundred times better than you did, I promise. We were all very worried about you that day. I'm just glad you're still here to talk to us," She said gravely. Amy nodded.

"Thanks to you, Vivian. And please, call me Amy."

Vivian smiled wider at Amy's friendliness.

"Okay… Amy. But, I had a little help. My partner who administered CPR to you, for one. And your boyfriend of course."

Amy's eyes grew wide.

"Sheldon?" She asked, the simple act of saying his name warming her. Vivian nodded in the affirmative.

"It was clear as crystal how much he cares about you. When we arrived on the scene, I had to literally pry you out of his arms. He was very protective of you. It was brilliant of him to act so quickly to bring your temperature down and to put pressure on your head wound.

Vivian's words struck a chord in Amy.

"Brilliant," She echoed, picturing her Sheldon. "He _is_ brilliant. He is a gifted Physicist at Caltech University," She whispered proudly, making Vivian smile jovially at the obviously besotted woman.

"Well, I can believe that. I read from your chart that you are pretty gifted, yourself. You're a Neurobiologist?" She asked Amy in genuine interest.

"Yes. I also work at Caltech. I'm currently working on addiction studies."

Vivian sat back in her chair, eyeing Amy with mirthful eyes.

"Ooh…did you both meet there? An office romance?" She asked, the saucy tone of her voice making Amy blush.

"No…we actually met through an online dating service. I was forced into it by my mother, and he was blackmailed into it by two of his closest friends. We hit it off right away, but didn't become an actual couple for another year and a half. I went on a date with a mutual friend, and Sheldon didn't take it so well," She said sheepishly, moving around a bit in bed to get more comfortable.

Vivian was intrigued. She had never tried online dating herself, but it seemed in this instance it worked out perfectly. From what she saw of Sheldon Cooper, she could believe with certainty that he would have most definitely had a problem with this woman dating another man.

"He loves you," She stated matter-of-factly, feeling surprised when Amy's eyes shot to hers in shock.

"W-What?" She stammered, swallowing harshly and wincing at the pain in her tender throat.

"I said, he loves you."

Amy furrowed her brows, at a loss. While it was true, she knew Sheldon loved her, she could hardly believe a stranger who spent all of an hour with him could see it. She laughed nervously, and Vivian was worried she offended her.

"I'm sorry, Amy. I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable. I just know what I saw."

Amy bit her lip, a self-deprecating chuckle escaping.

"You…gathered that from a few moments with him? I've spent years with him and I didn't see it. He doesn't like to show emotion. It's his coping mechanism. There are still aspects of our relationship that are…complicated."

"Hmmm…" Vivian mused, narrowing her eyes in disbelief. "May I be frank, Dr. Fowler?"

Amy looked at her seriously, nodding her head.

"The man I saw clutching you tightly in your bathroom, falling in a heap on your bedroom floor after we ordered him out of the room, and grasping your hand in the ambulance as if it were a lifeline…loves you. He was a mess. He was keeping it together as best he could. I see a lot of people in his state; watching loved ones on the verge of death, and feeling helpless. I feel sorry for them. I felt so sorry for _him_. I don't know how close you both are, but I thought you should know. He would have bargained with God himself if he thought he could save you."

Tears began to gather in Amy's eyes at Vivian's words. Could he really have been that worried? That…emotional?

"Sheldon doesn't believe in God. He is a Scientist," She croaked quietly, averting her eyes. Vivian smiled.

"He's a man first, Amy. I was there. Believe me…I could _feel_ his love for you. It was pretty intense."

The two women stared at each other in silence, and Amy bit her lip self-consciously. She didn't know exactly why Vivian was telling her this. Perhaps, she felt Amy needed to know just how much Sheldon was affected by her near death experience. She reached her hand out to grasp Vivian's hand.

"Thank you, Vivian."

Vivian nodded, patting Amy's arm gently in return.

"You're welcome, Dr. Fowler."

A throat cleared in the doorway, and both women turned their attention to the sound.

"Amy?" Sheldon asked tentatively, his eyes flickering between his girlfriend and her visitor.

When Vivian turned around, Sheldon lost his breath.

It was the EMT from that dreadful night, his mind supplied, and he swallowed deeply as memories from that horrible afternoon began to bombard him. Needing to banish them, he walked into the room and came to stand on the Amy's free side.

"Hello, Dr. Cooper. It's nice to see you again. Under _decidedly_ better circumstances. I was just checking on our patient here." She said sweetly, her eyes roaming over Sheldon's face curiously.

"Vivian." he stated, more to himself than to her.

Her eyes lit up.

"That's right. I'm surprised you remembered," She said, turning and winking at Amy.

"He remembers everything. He has an eidetic memory," Amy murmured, and Vivian chuckled, impressed.

"Wow…handsome _and_ brilliant. You are one lucky gal, Dr. Fowler."

Amy smiled softly as she noticed Sheldon blushed ten shades of pink. Sheldon had no idea what they had been discussing, but something in the pit of his stomach told him that he figured in the conversation somewhere. He shuffled awkwardly on his feet, not sure what to say. Vivian decided to let him off the hook.

"Well, I just wanted to say hello and offer my well wishes. I can see that Amy is in capable hands," She said slyly, rising from the chair and smoothing down her sweater.

"Amy, here is my card. If you need anything, even to talk, give me a call. It was wonderful meeting you. I'm so glad you're going to be alright."

Amy took the card she offered, placing it on her tray.

"Thank you, Vivian. For everything."

The woman smiled at her, turning her attention to Sheldon.

"Dr. Cooper," She tilted her head. "Goodbye."

Sheldon smiled at her politely, embarrassed all of a sudden. This woman saw him at his worst the other day. Soaking wet, terrified, and crazed. Yet her kind nature and gentle tone of voice put him at ease. He realized something then that he overlooked amidst the chaos. As she exited the room, he found himself needing to go after her.

"Excuse me a moment, Amy." He said quietly.

He quickly strode out of the room, relieved when he saw Vivian at the elevator bay.

"Vivian?" He called out, and the woman in question turned around. She smiled softly at Sheldon.

"Yes, Dr. Cooper?"

Suddenly, his vocal cords felt heavy.

"I never thanked you for taking such good care of Amy the other day. You saved her life. I just…I can't imagine what would have happened if you were a moment late…" He trailed off, his voice faltering. He took a shuddering breath, once again feeling embarrassed. Vivian looked around, before taking a step into his space.

"Sheldon, Amy will be alright now. You must remember that. And I hope you understand something…_YOU_ saved your girlfriends life. It was your arrival and quick thinking that kept her alive until we arrived. You were there for her when she needed you most. Take comfort in that truth. Okay?"

Sheldon bit his lip as he listened to the woman, nodding his head quickly.

"Okay," He said quietly, stepping back as the elevator arrived. "You know…I think you should become a doctor. You have a wonderful bedside manner," He said with respect.

Vivian chuckled as the doors opened and she stepped inside.

"Well…it just so happens I _am_ in medical school. One day soon, you will be calling _me_ Dr."

Impressed, Sheldon smiled. Vivian returned it, waving at him.

"Take care of her," She said emphatically just as the doors closed, whisking her away. Sheldon stood there a moment, staring at the closed doors and taking in her words.

"I will," He whispered resolutely. "I promise."

A/N- So our Vixen is awake. And already keeping Sheldon on his toes. You've got to love her. I know I do.


	14. Chapter 14

~Chapter 14~

A/N – I'm so pleased that everyone liked Sheldon &amp; Amy's reunion. More reuniting to come. My heart is full with all of the sweet friendship you've shown me. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…And high up above or down below. When you're too in love to let it go. But if you never try you'll never know… Just what you're worth. Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you…" Coldplay – Fix You

Sheldon opened Amy's apartment door, staring inside before allowing her to enter. She stood behind him, clinging to his arm gently. The warm weight of her reassured him she was here, she was alive, and she was alright.

Sheldon had taken the bus to Amy's apartment to pick up her car. He drove it back to the hospital so he could take her home. It was the middle of the day, and everyone was at work so they couldn't help them. Besides, the time had come for him to take a more active role in driving. Amy had taught him well, and he knew how to drive just as well as anyone. He didn't like it, and didn't like being alone on the short journey back to the hospital. But he kept reminding himself over and over, _'This is for Amy. Be the man she needs'._

Penny had come by a few days ago, and cleaned Amy's place from top to bottom. Sheldon was grateful that she cleared up all of the debris left over by the Paramedics. He had no desire to witness anything that reminded him that he almost lost Amy, and she certainly didn't need to see just how near death she actually was. Penny cleaned the bathroom as well, since it was soaked and the floor covered in blood, and she washed Amy's sheets after replacing them with fresh ones.

The biggest problem was her bedroom rug. Stained with blood, Penny had to contact the building superintendent and inform him of what occurred. They had a contractor come out and replace the area that was damaged until a new rug could be laid down. Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief that neither one of them would have to see such a horrific sight.

Stepping aside, he guided Amy forward, depositing her on the couch before going back out into the hall for her belongings.

Amy looked around her living room. Nothing looked out of place; she never would have known anything had happened here. Fatigue and something else she couldn't name washed over her, and when Sheldon came in and shut the door, she met his concerned stare with a weary one of her own.

"Amy, are you alright? What can I get you?" He asked her tenderly, coming to sit beside her on the couch. The sweet, gentle tone of his voice was making it harder for her not to cry.

She had never thought Sheldon cared for her as deeply as he did. Hearing how he reacted from Vivian the other day simultaneously shocked and comforted her. It was her fondest wish, to have him look at her so lovingly. But the fact she was sick somehow sullied that.

A niggling though took root in her mind; what if he was only being so kind because it was his duty as her boyfriend? She didn't want him acting out of obligation, and she didn't want to be a burden to him.

She was certain she was just being emotional, but nearly dying would do that to you. Shaking her head of her melancholy thoughts, she turned to face him. Sheldon was watching her with rapt eyes.

"I think I need to lie down, Sheldon. I've suddenly come over very tired," She said quietly, eliciting a gasp from her boyfriend.

"Shall I call 911? Are you having a relapse?" He asked frantically, already reaching in his pocket for his phone. He rose quickly in a panic, and Amy rose with him, stilling his hand gently.

"No, no…it's not that. I just feel overwhelmed, is all. It's been a rough few weeks. Being home feels strange, like my mind knows something terrible happened here, but it won't let me remember it. I feel…" She trailed off, trying to find the right word. "Anxious."

Sheldon studied Amy with deep concern. She was afraid. It was no doubt, she was. After what her poor body and mind experienced, it was bound to be stressful being here. It was stressing _him_ out just being in this room.

"Amy…would you feel more comfortable recovering at my apartment?"

The words came out quickly, and they lingered in the air like gunpowder mist. Amy's eyes met Sheldon's in bewilderment.

"You may have my bed. I will take the couch. It was to be our arrangement here, anyway. I would feel better knowing you were comfortable," He rushed out, before he could lose his nerve.

Amy smiled at him warmly.

"I just need to calm down, Sheldon. Besides…I can't be afraid of my own home. It's just a place. It didn't cause my illness. I will be fine."

Sheldon stared at her, unconvinced.

'_But maybe I won't be'_…He wanted to say. Just being here now made his blood pressure rise. Every square inch of her apartment made him remember that awful day. He stared in the direction of her bathroom, his eyes wide and frightened.

"Sheldon? Are _you _alright?" She asked quietly.

He looked at her sweet, concerned face, and felt the panic begin to swirl in his stomach.

"No, Amy. I'm not. I'm…"

He slowly sat down on the sofa, at a loss with how to tell her what he was feeling. Amy followed him, sitting down gingerly beside him. She waited patiently as he wrung his hands together.

"Amy…walking into your room that day and seeing you…unresponsive- it did something to me. I have never been so frightened in my entire life. And that's saying something, since I'm mostly afraid of everything," He said softly, unable to face her. Amy tilted her head, waiting for him to continue.

"Even being here now brings back those feelings of helplessness. I wasn't sure you would make it. I was so scared that I would never hear your voice again. Or see you look at me with fondness like you do. I'm so sorry, Amy. I'm trying to be strong for you," He admitted shakily. Amy scooted closer to him and gently took his hands in hers.

"Sheldon…you _are_ strong. I couldn't ask for you to be any stronger. You have no idea how grateful I am for you being here. I know this is hard. But we need to calm down and get through this together. I can't worry that I will have a relapse, and you can't worry that being on my own is dangerous. I want things to return to normal. I understand what you've said; this has changed me in so many ways. Something happened to me…I can't explain it. I don't remember most of it. But I know it wasn't good. For my own peace of mind, I need to move on from it. Will you help me? Please?" She begged him gently.

Sheldon felt his eyes stinging. Didn't she know, that he would do _anything_ for her now? Anything at all?

He flipped their hands over, tracing the lines on her palm. Strong life line. Even stronger heart line. Sheldon tightened his grip on her fingers.

"Whatever you need from me, Amy…it's yours." He whispered sincerely.

The passion and conviction in his voice rocked her. Something was different about her boyfriend. Something had shifted in his demeanor. In his eyes. She couldn't quite put her finger on what it was, but she was too tired to try and figure it out now. They stared at each other with intensity for a moment before Amy bit her lip and lowered her gaze.

They sat in companionable silence before Sheldon rose, going into the kitchen to see what Penny bought for them to eat. She had stocked the refrigerator while she was here, and Sheldon was relieved he wouldn't have to leave Amy for any period of time.

Amy watched him go, feeling that something had definitely changed between them. There was an electricity in the air now that wasn't there before. She wondered briefly if it was post concussive psychosis that made her feel that way.

After he made her a nice dinner of homemade minestrone soup and crusty bread, Sheldon decided she needed to get some rest. Amy didn't argue as he led her to her bedroom, holding his hand as they walked slowly through the room. Amy tried to hide the fact she was nervous. Sheldon tried to hide the fact all he could see was her bleeding on the floor. They were each trying to be strong for one another, but the memories of that day were bombarding them both.

Amy dutifully stood next to him and waited as he turned down the comforter and fluffed her pillows.

"Do you want to change into a nightgown?" He asked softly, and Amy shook her head.

"No…this is fine," She answered, motioning to the sweat pants and t shirt she left the hospital in. "I want to take a shower, but…I'm not strong enough tonight. Maybe tomorrow."

Sheldon nodded, helping her get into bed.

The sheets were cool and fluffy. Sheldon had insisted Penny use his own fabric softener on them. Amy inhaled the scent, recognizing it as Sheldon's. She smiled warmly at him, loving how he blushed and averted his eyes.

Sheldon covered her gently with the blanket, turning to shut off the light. It was now early dusk, and the soft light of the sunset was hitting the window in a beautiful shade of orange. Amy watched Sheldon pad over to it, turning the blinds a bit to darken the room further. She watched his biceps as they worked the mechanism, wondering when they had gotten so big. Her boyfriend was so very handsome, she thought dreamily. He had no idea just how much, and that only added to his appeal.

"Do you need anything? A drink perhaps?" He asked kindly.

Amy swallowed heavily.

_Ask for what you want…Be assertive!_

"Could you…will you lie down with me? Until I fall asleep?" She asked timidly, certain Sheldon would refuse.

He stared at his sweet Amy, looking so fragile, lost and scared…and Sheldon didn't hesitate. He sat beside her on the bed, the motion startling him. He forgot that she had a waterbed. He smiled at her in embarrassment before settling in next to her, putting his arm around her as she lay on her side facing him. The moments passed, neither one speaking.

"Are you still anxious? About being back here, I mean?" He asked, and Amy nodded slowly. He knew the feeling. Being in this room was not easy. But he was determined to push those thoughts away, for Amy's sake.

"I could sing to you…to make you feel better." He whispered gently, breaking her out of her wandering thoughts. Amy turned her face to his and smiled.

"I'd like that," She said quietly. She closed her eyes, snuggling into his chest. He was being so sweet to her, and she was determined to soak it up now, while she could.

Sheldon cleared his throat, and she expected to hear the opening lines of Soft Kitty. The air was quiet for a moment before Sheldon began to sing in a soft baritone.

"Hello again, hello

Just called to say hello

I couldn't sleep at all tonight

And I know it's late

But I couldn't wait"

Amy opened her eyes slowly, sliding her head across the pillow to look at Sheldon in mute shock. He met Amy's gaze steadily, but he didn't stop singing…his voice a tender whisper in the quiet room.

"Hello, my friend, hello

Just called to let you know

I think about you every night

When I'm here alone

And you're there at home, hello"

Tears began to pool in Amy's eyes. She was completely overwhelmed with the fact Sheldon not only knew that she liked Neil Diamond and this was her favorite song of his, but how he knew hearing it sung by him would make her feel calm and secure. His own eyes filled with tears as his voice grew softer.

"Maybe it's been crazy

And maybe I'm to blame

But I put my heart above my head

We've been through it all

And you loved me just the same

And when you're not there

I just need to hear

Hello, my friend, hello

It's good to need you so

It's good to love you like I do

And to feel this way

When I hear you say, hello"

Sheldon ended the song, laying his head atop her own. Soft sobs escaped Amy's throat, but she didn't care that the salty tears burned her. She was alive. She was home. And Sheldon loved her. She felt like she would die from the love and sheer relief she felt.

"Sheldon," She whispered, gripping him tighter as he did the same to her. "Thank you."

They lay quietly in the darkness, him kissing her head delicately like she was made of fragile glass.

He wanted to unzip his body and allow her to step inside. He would do whatever it took to make her whole again. He had been given a precious gift. One he would not take for granted again.

The light outside changed from orange to purple to grey. But neither one noticed. They fell asleep, facing each other and clutching each other tightly. No further words needed to be spoken.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The days passed and Amy slowly grew stronger, although she tired easily, and standing or walking was a chore. She decided to take another two weeks off of work, to be certain she would be 100 % recovered.

Sheldon stayed with her for a week. He spent his days cooking for her, or bathing her, or reading to her. He had thought it would be awkward, indulging in these intimate acts. But something strange happened to him; he couldn't find it in himself to be embarrassed at seeing Amy naked or that their routine had become decidedly domestic. He pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind whenever they would emerge; Amy needed him now. He had to stay focused and not let his former fears sway him.

They spent their days doing puzzles, listening to the radio, watching old movies, and talking. A few times, he insisted they go for a work around the block to strengthen her muscles and allow for some fresh air. He held her hand tightly as they did, making her feel safe and secure. Sharing dinner together was the highlight of his day. He wondered at how being with her was so comforting, so…effortless.

And he chastised himself for the fact that he had previously shied away from this. Remembering those dreadful words to her last summer, about Amy never living with him…made him feel awful. They came back to haunt him nightly.

When her apartment was dark and she had fallen asleep, he would tiptoe into her room and stand in the doorway. He would watch her, making sure she was safe. He wondered idly what Amy would do if she awoke to find him looming over her. It took every ounce of his willpower to not get in bed beside her. He was getting addicted to holding her, and felt foolish about it. She seemed calm and comfortable, and probably didn't need him there as much as he needed to be there.

His feelings had definitely deepened the last month. Having faced the reality of losing his Amy, he knew something inside of him had changed.

Things were beginning to return to some semblance of normalcy. After that week came to an end, she insisted Sheldon return to Los Robles and back to his own routine. She didn't want to be selfish with his time; he'd already missed almost three weeks of work and research. Besides, she was feeling better and was not afraid anymore to be alone.

Dr. Preston had coordinated her follow up care with her own MD, and she'd given Amy the all clear to drive if she felt comfortable doing so.

Sheldon didn't know if he felt sad or relieved at being able to go home. He couldn't admit that he actually felt…happy, these last seven days. Perhaps Amy had been right all along. Being together, sharing a home together, wasn't such a bad thing. On the heels of that thought came the knowledge that he may have forever ruined his chance to do so.

For Amy, she was content having Sheldon here for the last week. It made her happier than she'd been in a long time. But part of her was still hesitant to allow him to stay, period. She didn't want to smother him, or make him feel trapped. She had learned the hard way that Sheldon needed his space. But she couldn't lie. The week spent with him recovering was the best of her life. Made sweeter by the fact she had lived to enjoy it.

Once he was gone, her mind drifted to him throughout the day; what was he doing, was he okay, was he eating like he should... He texted her constantly, demanding a return text within five minutes. She smiled at his bossiness; he was her Sheldon, alright. But she was grateful for his constant care. Every day at 10, 12, and 2 he called her. She never tired of hearing his deep voice. She'd close her eyes as he spoke to her, filling her in about his day.

She had been so worried about him, knowing how hard he took her illness. He was beginning to act like Sheldon again, but something was different altogether about him. He seemed more…mature. Focused. And the way he looked at her lately…

It turned her insides upside down whenever she thought of it.

Amy snapped herself out of her daydream. She glanced at the clock and it read 6:30 pm.

The girls were bringing goodies over to Amy's for their first girl's night in almost a month. Amy was desperate for some female company and some gossip.

Sheldon had been adamant; he didn't want them riling her up or exhausting her.

"_Sheldon, it will be fine. And I promise, no wine for me."_ She promised him.

Sheldon opened his mouth to speak, but Amy beat him to the punch.

"_Or ice cream. I know, I know…the cream isn't good for my lungs. Don't worry. Just some chocolate and popcorn."_

She smiled, picturing his sweet face.

A knock at the door rang out, and Amy slowly made her way over to answer it.

Penny and Bernadette stood there, goodies in hand and huge smiles on their faces. Amy choked up immediately, the loss of this for the last month hitting her full force. She missed her friends so much.

"Oh, Ames…We missed you. Thank God you're back," Penny cried, throwing herself at Amy and Bernadette following suit. They embraced her in a bear hug gently, before Penny broke away and wiped her nose and eyes.

"Now, let's get this party started!" Bernadette shrieked in her high pitched voice.

Amy raised her brows sheepishly.

"I promised Sheldon no wine or ice cream. So this party will be very junior high grade." Amy chuckled, wiping her own eyes.

Penny snorted, unladylike. "Not my junior high."

The three ladies laughed heartily, and just like that…everything was back to normal.

"Alright, alright…but once you're well, we're going clubbing! I remember those moves you showed in Vegas, baby. Maybe we need to take Sheldon dancing again so you can molest him out there on the dance floor this time," Bernadette said, smirking. Amy blushed and made her way to the kitchen to retrieve wine glasses for her two friends.

The ladies settled in, chatting and munching on the chocolate and chips Penny had bought.

"So…do you remember anything?" Penny asked quietly. This was the first time they had all been together since she came home, and they didn't want to stress her out by making her relive the event. Amy shook her head slowly.

"Well…I remember hearing Sheldon talking to me. I remember images. Light. I remember thinking I was out on the ocean. I guess it was the fact Sheldon brought me into the shower. I don't want to really know the details. And I don't think Sheldon wants to relive them, either."

The ladies nodded seriously, staring at each other. They were hesitant about how much to tell Amy about that time. Amy looked at them expectantly, needing to know something.

"Was Sheldon alright? Was it very hard for him?"

Penny gulped a sip of wine before answering.

"Well…Sheldon was a wreck. He wouldn't leave your side. He was devastated. We all were, of course, but…you know. When Leonard and I arrived…that night- Sheldon was inconsolable. I thought he would lose his mind, Amy. But then…he just…got it together. He even had a long conversation with your mother, apparently. I was so proud of him. We all were," She whispered, and Bernie nodded.

"I don't remember. It's like I was there, but I can't piece things together. I guess it's better that I don't remember." Amy said wistfully.

They sat in silence for a minute, when Penny cleared her throat.

"Amy…we both want you to know that we love you very much. I know in the past we've had our differences, but we never want you to feel excluded or less than an absolute necessity…in this group or our lives. We promise to never hurt your feelings again." Penny said, tears clogging her throat. Bernadette began to sniffle and Amy felt like crying as well.

"Thank you, both. I really needed to hear that."

"So…have you spoken to your mother since you came home?" Bernie asked, and Amy frowned.

"Yes, a few times. She came by the day after I came home to check on me. I don't know what Sheldon did, but she adores him now. It was surreal; like some bizarre alternate Universe went on without me. She was very caring, and sent everyone's love. She dropped a bombshell on me though."

The girls sat up, gazing at her in curiosity.

"My cousin Cassidy is getting married in a month, and she wants me to attend the wedding. The trouble is, Cassidy and I do not get along. At all. We're the same age, and when we were younger she used to torment me. At first, it was just jabs and ridicule. Then, she started to get violent. She'd scratch and slap me, leaving bruises. I never told my mother about that. But she knew we weren't close. Her asking me now to go to her wedding, so soon after my illness…well, I don't want to go." Amy said quietly.

Penny and Bernadette shot her an incredulous look.

"Amy…that bitch needs to be put in her place. You _have_ to go! If anything, to show off what a wonderful woman you've become. You are beautiful, brilliant, successful, and you have a man that loves you more than anything. Don't let her win. That's what bullies want. You need to waltz into that wedding with your head held high." Penny said, slamming her wine glass down on the table.

Amy pursed her lips.

"I don't know…I really don't want to see her. And I definitely don't want to go alone. I doubt Sheldon would be keen on the idea of taking me to a family wedding," She said dejectedly.

Penny chuffed.

"Are you kidding me? Amy…that man would do anything for you right now. He is so damn…what's the word?" She asked Bernadette in annoyance. Bernie finished chewing before she could answer.

"Besotted."

Penny hooked her finger in Amy's direction.

"Yes. Besotted. He is like a lovesick fool. I don't think if he knew what you went through he'd want you to go to this wedding alone. I think you'd be surprised at how much Sheldon wants to please you these days."

Amy pondered that, afraid to believe her bestie's words.

"Well…we shall see. It's still a month away. I have time to back out if I want."

Silence reigned and Amy tried to lasso the conversation back to a happier topic.

"So any wedding updates while I was sleeping?"

Penny smiled at Amy's lighthearted attempt to gloss over the stress of the last few weeks.

"Well…Leonard agreed. No Klingon anything at the wedding."

Penny wiped imaginary sweat from her vow, taking a sip of her wine. Bernadette nodded, perfectly understanding Penny's resignations.

"I can't believe we actually had those for our wedding. As it turned out, they were never needed because it was just the seven of us, my parents, and Howard's mother. I really dodged a bullet there." Bernadette said, also gulping her wine.

Amy tilted her head to the side, considering their words.

"I don't know…I think that if Howard or Leonard really wanted it, you guys should have allowed it. Think about what they were and are sacrificing: a big wedding, tons of people, expensive food. A little compromise wouldn't be terrible. You know their love of Sci-Fi."

She took a sip of her juice, not noticing the pin drop silence that suddenly encompassed her apartment. She looked up, meeting the stunned eyes of her two best friends.

"Who are you and what have you done with Amy?" Penny deadpanned, staring closely at her friend. The Neurobiologist drew her brows together in a frown.

"What? I'm just saying that a little amalgamation of both parties wants and desires would be completely fair. The fact that the men you love would do anything to make you happy should convince you of their intent. You should be grateful and reciprocate the gesture."

Penny and Bernadette exchanged a look that Amy missed as she sipped her drink thoughtfully.

Penny leaned forward, examining Amy more closely with a huge smile on her face.

"No, seriously. Who are you?" She asked Amy.

Bernadette tried to interject.

"Oh, I understand what Amy is trying to say. It's not like the boys ever ask us to participate in any of their science fiction thingies. I guess it would be alright if we gave them that much."

Penny wasn't convinced.

"Yeah…I'm not buying it. Amy, why the change of heart? I remember on several occasions where you were dead set against any of Sheldon's outer space nonsense. Don't tell me our favorite Theoretical Physicist has driven you to the dark side of the moon." Penny snorted, gulping a sip of wine. Amy drew her brows together in contemplation.

"I think you meant the _dark side_. As in Star Wars. The reference you made of the Dark Side of the Moon was an album by Pink Floyd, and has no bearing on our science fiction conversation whatsoever."

Penny stopped drinking mid sip and stared at Amy. The tone of Amy's voice sounded so much the Amy she knew and loved.

"Oh, Amy…you're back!" Penny gushed, rising to envelop her in another hug. Amy hung on as best she could.

"Well, ladies…I must head out. Howie is cooking dinner and we are renting a romantic movie on Netflix," Bernadette chimed, bringing her half full glass of wine to Amy's sink to rinse it. Amy walked her to the door, looking up expectantly when Bernadette stopped on the threshold.

"Amy…it really is wonderful having you back. I missed you." She said, and Amy could hear the sincerity in every syllable.

"Thank you, Bernadette. I'm happy to be back as well."

The two friends hugged, tears in their eyes as they pulled apart.

After saying goodbye to Bernie, Penny gathered up her purse and jacket as well.

"I think I'll head out, too. I have some errands to run before dinner."

Amy nodded, walking her friend to the door.

"Oh…I forgot to ask. Do you have a raincoat I can borrow? My company is sending me to San Francisco next week, and I don't want to buy one for just a few days," Penny asked.

"Sure, I'll get it for you." Amy said, Penny following her into her bedroom and sitting on the bed while Amy fished through her chest of drawers for the coat. She looked around her friend's room, smiling warmly. Not a thing was out of place, in contrast to her own room.

On her dresser was a clear glass box, a perfect square, and inside of it held Amy's most prized possession: the tiara Sheldon bought her. Penny smiled as she remembered the day he gave it to Amy.

"Amy, have you ever thought about having your tiara insured?"

"Hmm?" Amy asked absently, rising on her toes to reach a plastic storage box on the top shelf.

"Your tiara. You should have it insured. In case it's ever stolen." Penny said.

Amy turned around, coat in hand and smiling widely.

"Found it. It may be a tad big on you, but you'll need it. San Francisco is cold this time of year."

Penny frowned, eyeing the coat.

"Yeah. Thank you. About your tiara, did you hear what I said?"

Amy came and sat next to Penny on the bed, rolling her eyes.

"Yes, I heard you. But that would be a tad overkill, don't you think? I know it's just a trinket, but it holds great sentimental value to me. I doubt if I were robbed, they would want that, when I have thousands of dollars of computer equipment here."

Penny pondered that.

"A trinket? You think that tiara is just a trinket?"

Amy shrugged, looking away in embarrassment.

"I know it isn't real, Penny. But I don't say trinket in as in it's a piece of junk. To me, it could cost a million dollars, but it would be no more special. It was a gift from Sheldon, after all."

Realization dawned on Penny.

"Umm…Amy? I know it wouldn't matter to you one way or the other, but…that tiara Sheldon bought for you is real."

Amy rolled her eyes. "I know it's real, Penny. It's sitting on my dresser."

Penny scrunched up her nose in a distasteful way. And everyone thought _she _was dumb.

"No, Ames…I mean real as in the diamonds are real. Authentic. They aren't crystals. They aren't even cubic zirconia."

Amy's mouth fell open in shock, her gaze drifting from Penny to the tiara in question.

"That can't be, Penny. There is no way Sheldon would have bought me real diamonds so soon into our relationship. You must be mistaken."

Penny pursed her lips as she stared at her friend.

"Yes, they_ are_ real diamonds. I was with him when he bought it. He spent hours looking for the perfect gift. What began as a token of guilt became a mission to Sheldon. When he spotted that tiara, he just knew you would love it."

Amy gaped at Penny, shell shocked.

"Penny…how much did he spend on the tiara?"

Penny rubbed her face, sighing loudly.

"Amy, it was a gift. You shouldn't know the price."

"Penny, please…tell me."

Penny warred with what she knew was right, and her friends happiness.

"Well, it was on sale. Everything was half off. Sheldon ended up paying five thousand dollars for it."

All of the blood drained from Amy's face.

"I'm sorry…what?"

"Amy, please don't let Sheldon know I told you."

"Sheldon spent five thousand dollars on me? Wait a minute…half price? That tiara is worth ten thousand dollars?"

Amy's voice was incredulous and Penny was worried she was going to have a panic attack.

"Ames, honey…calm down."

"Calm down? Calm down? How can I calm down Penny? Whatever possessed Sheldon to buy me such an extravagant gift?"

Penny smiled as she remembered Sheldon's explanation.

"He picked out the tiara himself. You remember when you said you were a Princess? Well you were right. You are _his_ Princess."

Amy was speechless as tears filled her eyes. Penny closed the distance between them, opening her arms for her friend. Amy tentatively stepped into them.

"It's been terrible without you, Ames. Promise me that you'll never do anything like this again." Penny whispered. Amy nodded her head.

"I promise."

"Good."

The girls broke apart, Penny smirking at Amy.

"Trinket…don't you dare tell Sheldon I told you! I already have enough strikes to last me for ten years! He'd kill me if he knew I spilled the beans."

"Girl Sprouts honor," She saluted, making Penny snort.

"Yeah…Sprouts." She laughed, so happy to have her friend back. Amy was quirky and one of a kind. Penny loved that about her more than anything.

After Penny left, Amy found herself standing by her dresser lost in thought. Her gaze swung to the glass box on her dresser, and the treasure that lay within. Lifting up the lid carefully, she pulled out the tiara and placed it upon her head. She still had an angry looking scar from where the stitches on her forehead were removed yesterday. The effect reminded her of the Bride of Frankenstein.

"Don't you look charming," She whispered. She supposed it was her battle scar now.

So…Sheldon thought of her as his Princess. Yet all along, she had thought of herself as a peasant. Could it be, that he had actually…loved her, even then?

That was crazy, she thought, shaking her head of her wayward thoughts. Yet one look in the mirror at her diamond encrusted headband, she felt warm inside.

No matter what, Sheldon had definitely become her Prince. Being asleep for so long, and facing death had changed her life. She knew one thing now for certain…

She deserved a happily ever after, and she was going to get it.

And she was going to make sure Sheldon got one, as well.


	15. Chapter 15

~Chapter 15~

A/N- Thank you to everyone for continuing to read and review. I can't express my appreciation, other than to give you what you all want: A beautiful Sheldon and Amy love story. And on that note… We've gone 14 chapters with SO MUCH ANGST…it dawned on me, you've all been SO patient...*whistles, winks, and blushes* Nothing to see here…move along…

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…When everything inside me looks like everything I hate, you are the hope I have for change you are the only chance I'll take and I'm on fire when your near me, I'm on fire when you speak, I'm on fire burning out these mysteries…" Switchfoot – On Fire

_Two weeks later_

Leonard walked into 4a, throwing his keys into the bowl by the door as usual. His eyes fell upon Sheldon who was standing by the window, staring out blankly. He greeted him with a '_Hey, what's up_?', but Sheldon ignored him.

While his friend and soon to be former roommate was many things, hard of hearing was not one of them. The fact Sheldon didn't even acknowledge his presence was strange. He tapped him on the shoulder, and Sheldon startled as if Leonard had frightened him.

"Sheldon, are you alright? I said hello you and you didn't even hear me. Isn't that like a sacrilege, because of your 'Vulcan' hearing?"

Sheldon stared at his best friend, distracted.

"I'm…just waiting for it to be 6:45. Saturn will be visible in the sky soon," He answered absently, turning back toward the window without so much as a hello.

Leonard knew that Sheldon was going through a lot these days; since Amy came home, he worried about her in a way Leonard had never seen before. It was almost obsessive. He tried to hide it, but Leonard picked up on the fact that when they weren't together, He texted her constantly. He himself breathed a sigh of relief every time Sheldon made contact with her and she was alright. The more time that passed, the easier it got, but Sheldon still wasn't himself. It was as though Sheldon felt if he blinked, Amy would disappear.

Making his way to the fridge, Leonard grabbed a water and popped it open briskly.

"Will Amy be joining us for dinner tonight, Sheldon?"

Sheldon barely moved from his spot, but his eyes met Leonard's across the room.

"Yes. She texted me a few hours ago to confirm she would be coming."

His voice sounded strange, and if Leonard had to hazard a guess as to what was behind that, he would have to say relief.

He watched Sheldon fiddle with the telescope, his gaze flittering back and forth between it and the window. Normally by now, he would have been sprouting off a myriad of scientific terms and algorithms about Saturn and the Universe in general. His hunched posture and docile attitude were peculiar. Leonard came closer, not wanting to spook him again.

"Sheldon-"

"Leonard…did Amy say anything to you that would indicate she was upset with me? I mean…on the drive to Arizona last summer? Sheldon asked abruptly, meeting Leonard's taken aback stare head on.

Leonard pursed his lips, wondering where this was coming from. They picked Sheldon up over six months ago. Why would he be bringing it up now, of all times, after all that had happened since then? He thought they had moved past all of that, but the anxious look on Sheldon's face spoke volumes.

"No, Sheldon. Amy wasn't upset with you. Not in the least. In fact, I would have to say she was very worried _about _you. She had been worried about you since the day you left. Made worse by the fact you were robbed. And that you left without telling her you were leaving to begin with."

Leonard grimaced at that memory, of suffering the wrath of Amy's anger by way of a very hard pillow. Sheldon winced as well, turning back to the window.

"Yes. I can imagine," He whispered, not wanting to revisit the emotions of that day.

Coming back to his friend, Leonard gave Sheldon a comforting pat on the back.

"Listen buddy…Amy loves you. She went through a lot while you were gone, but she is still here for a reason. I doubt with all of the time she has invested in your relationship, she would give up that easily. If something is bothering you, then you both need to find a way to talk about things."

Sheldon could only stare at him, confusion evident on his face.

"I…we talk all the time, Leonard," He said, but Leonard caught the naïve manner in which the words were spoken. Emotions and their descriptions were way out of Sheldon's depth.

"I know that, Sheldon…but, well…to put it bluntly- where did Dr. Whackadoodle and Dr. Know it all go? You guys used to speak your own language. Everything was effortless. Somewhere along the way, you stopped being comfortable around each other. You need to open up to her more. I know it's scary. But trust me. You won't be sorry. If anyone can help you through this, it's Amy. She has the patience of a saint. And she's the most intelligent woman I've ever met. Outside of my mother, of course. For some miraculous reason, she is crazy about you. A partner like that deserves more."

Sheldon blinked at him like a deer in headlights. He knew exactly what Leonard was suggesting.

"Unless of course, you don't want to offer her those things?" He questioned.

Leonard couldn't imagine such a thing occurring, especially after all Sheldon went through while Amy was in the hospital.

Sheldon's looked at Leonard, aghast.

"What? No! Of course not. It's just…circumstances have arisen that…-"He trailed off, not sure how to say what he wanted to say. Leonard waited patiently, so Sheldon tried again.

"Leonard…I don't know if Amy confided in Penny and Penny told you, but…the night I left…I said some terrible things to Amy. Hurtful, spiteful things. I hurt her feelings. I know I did, but I couldn't stop. The words just poured out of me in a torrent. I couldn't stop, Leonard. And now…" He sighed, closing his eyes.

"And now?" Leonard repeated softly, giving Sheldon time to articulate his thoughts.

"Now…I fear I may have ruined our chances for…intimacy. What if Amy is realizing that I'm not worth the effort anymore? I couldn't blame her," He finished, looking down bleakly. "I found that while staying with her after she came home from the hospital…I…liked being with her. _Living_ with her. And it occurred to me that just when I've figured out what Amy was talking about, she may no longer want to live with _me_ someday."

Leonard never thought he would see the day when Sheldon Cooper was depressed over a woman. A woman he feared didn't want to be _intimate_ with him. And not just any woman. A woman he actually _loved_. Sheldon was in love. Were they really having this conversation?

Penny hadn't discussed this with Leonard as Sheldon assumed; truthfully, Amy hadn't spent much time with Penny during Sheldon's absence. Leonard got the distinct impression Amy was hurt and angry at he and Penny's involvement with Sheldon's leaving. Leonard knew Sheldon would be angry at them if he knew how little they spoke over his time away. Not by their choice, of course. Amy seemed distant, and Leonard understood. Even being here in their apartment would have been difficult for her.

"Penny didn't mention anything, Sheldon. So…what did you say to Amy that you think has caused her to be upset with you?"

Sheldon took a deep breath, his eyes focused on the floor.

"I mocked a future together. I intoned that living together, marriage, children, and living 'happily ever after' was laughable. I told her she was never moving in here. I told her things would never change. I told her the syrup was better, and I didn't like the syrup."

Leonard tried to keep up, but Sheldon wasn't making sense. He pulled his brows down in confusion.

"Syrup Sheldon? You lost me, buddy."

Sheldon rolled his eyes in a dramatic turn, huffing loudly.

"Nestle Quik! She is the syrup, Leonard. Amy always buys me the syrup. It's delicious. But…don't you get it? With her, everything is better. But I can't…I won't…the syrup is too good for me. The powder is what I'm used to, mediocre as it is. But I'm accustomed to that, Leonard." He whined, wringing his hands together. Leonard nodded, finally understanding.

"So…your life before Amy was the powder. And Amy, with her arrival, brought the syrup which is better. But you don't want the syrup?"

Sheldon huffed loudly.

"That is the whole point, Leonard! I _do_ want the syrup. But I'm afraid. What if I allow the syrup in, only to have it taken away from me? How could I go back to the god awful powder now that I know the syrup is so much better? I almost lost the syrup once. I can't…I can't go through that again."

Leonard offered his friend a sympathetic look.

"Listen, buddy…I doubt Amy is cooking up ways to dump you. But in any case, I think it would be wise of you to not play fast and loose with her affections. A woman can only take so much. Amy has been with you through a lot. I wouldn't take her for granted anymore if I were you. You once said you have a mutual admiration that skews in your favor. I think you need to start realizing _you _are the fortunate one."

While Leonard's words were direct and jarring, they hit a nerve with Sheldon.

"You are right, Leonard. I know I am lucky to have Amy in my life. She is…everything to me. I will take your words under advisement. I can't lose her. Not after…" He halted, gulping.

Leonard nodded in understanding.

"I'm going to go change for dinner. Will you be okay?" Leonard asked.

"Yes," Sheldon said quietly, turning his attention back to the window.

It was almost time to check the telescope. He positioned it by the window, dialing in the coordinates that Raj had given him earlier. While he waited for the dial to click into place, his mind wandered to Amy. She would be here any minute, and that made him happy. If not a tad nervous.

He couldn't lie and say he wasn't elated at receiving her text today, affirming the fact she was joining them for dinner. It was not a normal date night for them, simply a random Tuesday. But he was pleased, nonetheless, that she was able to join them.

After the events of the last few weeks, he felt like he was on tenterhooks. There was so much he wanted to say to Amy, yet he didn't know how. Perhaps all they needed was time. Leonard was right; they had to find a way to work this out. He only hoped any damage he had caused could be repaired. He thought of what Arthur had said – about giving Amy a piece of his heart.

What frightened him more than anything was the very real fact he knew she owned the whole damn thing, anyway.

The morning after she came home, he awoke to find himself tangled with her on her waterbed. He hadn't meant to fall asleep next to her, but the peacefulness and relief he felt knowing she was safe lulled him to sleep. It was the first good night's sleep he'd had in weeks. When he opened his eyes, it was to a deeply sleeping Amy. He gazed at her, unguarded, for almost fifteen minutes before rising to shower. He was in no rush to leave her side, and that gave him pause….

Why had he fought against them living together for so long? It was a HUGE step, no doubt. But it wasn't like Amy was going to suddenly try to change him. Actually, it felt comforting to think she would be closer to him, sharing his space.

Returning home to his apartment, his organized room, his organized _life_…hadn't been as easy and as anticipated as he thought.

Had it taken him nearly losing Amy to see what a child he had been all of this time? Whining and kicking and screaming about change while the rest of the world was spinning happily on its axis? He felt ashamed to think about the numerous times he acted like a ten year old, scrunching up his nose at the very notion is his girlfriend wanting to _kiss_ him. Things had to change. He felt it, down to the marrow of his bones.

And this time…it would be because he _wanted_ it to. Not because he felt forced to do it in order to keep her away from would be suitors.

A knock broke Sheldon from his thoughts, and he padded to the door. Throwing it open, he met Amy's eyes and smiled at her gently. He had been anxious all day to see her. Each time he looked at her now, he felt like he was coming alive. It was as if his heart jump started whenever she was near.

He gulped as she smiled shyly in return. She was wearing that soft pink sweater he loved so much; the one from their Napa trip. She looked like a small kitten, the angora fur just screaming to be touched. She was beautiful in pink; so delicate and pretty. What he found undeniably attractive about her, was how she was soft on the outside, yet strong on the inside. He stood gazing at her for a few seconds, just drinking her in.

"Hello," He whispered, his intense scrutiny making Amy tremble.

"Good evening, Sheldon. Am I late?" I hope I didn't throw off our schedule. I know I said 7 and it's five past."

Sheldon moved aside to let her in, closing the door in the process.

"No…not at all. Leonard is getting ready," He said, walking up to the window. "I was actually about to look through the telescope," He admitted softly. Amy walked over to him, intrigued.

"What are you looking at?"

Sheldon turned back to her.

"Saturn. Would you like to take a look? It just rose in the sky about fifteen minutes ago."

Amy nodded enthusiastically, following Sheldon up to the window. She waited as he took a peek, moving away to calibrate the lens.

He looked through the eyepiece again, the happy smile on his face contagious. Amy's own lips lifted as she watched him.

He urged for her to come closer to the instrument by taking Amy's wrist gently. She barely had time to register his velvety touch and before she knew it, he had released her.

Sheldon registered it though, the feel of her skin warm and electric.

"Here, just tilt your head at a forty five degree angle," He murmured, catching a whiff of her fragrant hair as she bent her knees to look through the eyepiece. The dizzying, delicious scent made Sheldon close his eyes briefly. He kept his eyes trained on her as her steady gaze focused on the spinning planet. He bent his body down so that their heads were nearly touching, as though he could see what she saw through the eyepiece.

Amy gasped, then let out a quiet sound of awe. The rings of ice and rock were amazing as they swirled around the gas giant.

"Oh wow, Sheldon…that is simply amazing. Have you ever seen anything so incredibly beautiful?" She gushed, tearing her eyes away from the telescope and realizing too late how close Sheldon was.

Millimeters apart, his eyes burned into hers. Sheldon found himself spellbound by their color. Were they always _this_ green? And not just her hair, as he thought seconds ago, but _she_ smelled incredible. It wasn't often he was so close to her. Even with his eidetic memory, he never remembered being so…_attracted_ to her before. It must have been here, all along. One more facet to the puzzle that was Amy Farrah Fowler.

Swallowing the painful lump in his throat, Sheldon answered the only way he could.

"Yes…I have," He whispered, his gaze lowering to her lips.

It was there, in that fleeting second of time, that Amy knew he was talking about her. The fact he was addressing her as beautiful warmed her. Amy felt a magnetic pull toward those eyes of his. She could feel her heart begin to beat out of control, even as she witnessed Sheldon's breathing increasing. As he continued to stare at her, his pupils dilated and locked on hers, she knew she was a goner. Sheldon licked his lips, inclining his head towards hers.

_He's going to kiss me. He's going to kiss me. He's going to kiss me…Please, kiss me…please…_

Leonard emerged from the bathroom, adjusting his jacket.

"Hey, Amy. When did you get here?

At the interruption, Amy panicked, pulling away. Sheldon remained, his lips puckered, until he too caught himself. Brows knitting together in disappointment, he stood back giving Amy some room.

Neither one of them knew what to say. The moment was lost, but they both lamented its passing.

Sheldon took another step backward, the movement sending a twinge of pain to his heart. Amy didn't budge; she was rooted in place and terrified to move. It had never been this awkward between them, and Amy hated it. So Leonard caught them about to kiss. Where was the harm in that?

Amy tried to speak, but it felt like a steel vice was clamping down on her vocal cords.

"Umm…a few minutes ago." She choked out, answering his previous question but avoiding Leonard's stare.

Leonard narrowed his eyes. "Is everything alright?" He asked cautiously, noting how Sheldon blushed and Amy paled. His eyes darted between the two, but neither was willing or able to answer.

Sheldon cleared his throat. Nodding curtly, he stepped around the telescope and skirted past Amy. He barely looked at her, and Amy didn't know if that made her feel better or worse.

"Yes, we're just fine Leonard. Are you finished so we can go?" He asked quietly, already going to the closet to grab his coat. His voice lacked his usual impatience.

Leonard stared in confusion at Sheldon before settling his compassionate gaze on Amy. She smiled at him, but it seemed forced.

Leonard frowned.

"Yeah. All finished. Let's head out; Penny is meeting us at the restaurant. Amy, do you want to ride with us, or leave to go home right from dinner?"

Amy's eyes met Sheldon's, who was standing by the open front door like a statue. He looked worried at the notion she would not want to come back here for a bit. He also looked hurt that she had pulled away. But that was crazy. Sheldon never wanted to kiss her willingly before. It was more of an obligation to him than anything else. Besides…this wasn't a date night, and it wasn't the end of said date night. He should have been relieved that she pulled away, taking the pressure off of him to continue. She knew he hated PDA's, especially in front of their friends. He wasn't hurt by her actions…

_Right?_

Yet as Sheldon turned his gaze away from hers abruptly, staring in the vicinity of the elevator, she wasn't so sure. Did he actually _want_ to kiss her? Was he angry at her for getting cold feet and pulling away?

Emotions and brain a jumble, Amy could only answer Leonard quietly.

"I will ride with you and return back here for my car," She whispered.

Sheldon gave Amy what he hoped was a cordial smile. Her eyes darted around his face for a moment before he turned her, ushering down the stairs. He watched her as she walked ahead of him.

Leonard grabbed his arm before he could follow her.

"Everything okay?" He asked Sheldon again, this time with an air of seriousness. Sheldon shook his head helplessly.

"I…don't know."

Leonard drew his brows together.

"What happened? I left you both alone for five minutes."

Sheldon looked perplexed, trying to comprehend exactly where their meeting went wrong.

"I…was showing her Saturn. We made chit chat. I almost…" He stopped, taking a deep breath. Leonard waited for him to continue, but no further explanation was forthcoming. Sheldon bounded down the stairs after Amy, leaving Leonard to follow after them wondering what the hell that was about.

Dinner was going to be interesting.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Interesting was an understatement.

Dinner was equally tense. Thank God for Howard and Raj, interjecting some lighthearted banter into the conversation. It was as though the entire group felt the tension emanating from Sheldon and Amy.

"Are you feeling alright now, Amy?" Raj asked her gently, and Amy smiled at her friend.

"Much better, Rajesh. Thank you. I still feel a tad tired, but nothing out of the ordinary."

The entire table breathed a sigh of relief at Amy's words. They hadn't realized just how stressed her illness made everyone. It was wonderful that things were returning to normal again.

Penny looked over at Sheldon a few times, only to notice he was openly staring at Amy. But whenever Amy would look up he would covertly turn away. Likewise, whenever Amy would dare to look in Sheldon's direction, her face would visibly blush and she was certain the whole table saw it.

Much like Leonard, Penny shook her head in resignation. What was going _on_ with these two lately?

Sheldon felt like his heartrate was spiking each time he drew a breath. He didn't know what happened back at the apartment, but he knew the feelings stirring in his chest felt like an impending heart attack.

One moment they were looking at Saturn, and the next he felt the undeniable urge to kiss her. He'd missed kissing her all of these lonely weeks. Late at night when he was alone, he often thought back to their past date night kisses. He wondered if she did, as well.

He hadn't initiated any kissing since she'd been home. They hadn't had any 'date' nights since her return; mostly due to the fact Sheldon stayed with her for that week. Every time he found himself gazing at her lips or her eyes for very long, he would fear Amy catching him gawking and think he was a creeper. _She almost died_, his mind would not so subtly remind him, and here he was- ready to pounce on her like a cat with a mouse. He was trying to be a gentleman, and put his…urges…aside.

_Dear Lord…I have urges now?_ He thought in terror.

He felt like he was courting Amy all over again, and this time…he was determined to do it right. With her recovering, the last thing he wanted to do was stress her out. But each time he looked at her plump, soft lips…

He had to snap himself out of his thoughts before the whole table knew what he was thinking.

Looking back, he felt foolish that he actually scheduled kissing into the relationship agreement. Kissing and showing affection shouldn't be something one _scheduled_, like a dental appointment or a prostate exam. Yet the more Sheldon dwelled upon it, the more agitated he grew.

Sheldon had to control his environment. Homeostasis was a must. All of these changes lately had left him reeling out of control. He felt like a star that had gone supernova; imploding from within and hurtling it's innards out into the universe at a million miles an hour. The scary thing was that he knew without a doubt all these kissing imaginings didn't send him to want to run and hide. _That_ was the problem.

All at once, he had to get up and get away.

"Excuse me," He whispered, rising and throwing his napkin down on his chair. Amy watched him go, worrying about what was going through her boyfriend's mind.

Sheldon returned after about fifteen minutes. The only notice anyone made was Leonard, cocking a brow to his friend in silent question. Sheldon simply nodded once, sitting down again and taking a long gulp of his tea.

"So, Amy…when are you returning to work?" Howard asked casually, and the whole table fixed their gaze upon Amy.

"Tomorrow. I have a meeting with my Dept. Chair. I'm a little nervous; I know it's probably nothing, just a welcoming back of sorts."

"Don't feel bad. Tomorrow is a teaching day for Sheldon. I'm going to send him to class wearing a crash helmet," Leonard joked, everyone joining in.

Sheldon shot an annoyed glare his way.

"I resent that comment. Lately, I've had great success as a Professor. The student's don't seem to spend the entire hour dozing off anymore." Sheldon said haughtily.

"That's because they're too busy making anonymous death threats on twitter," Raj snarked. Howard giggled, but jumped to Sheldon's defense.

"No, that's not entirely fair. Sheldon is doing a really good job. Everyone is talking about it."

"Thank you, Howard. I never thought I'd say this, but…you've gained access to my tree fort."

Even though it was ridiculous, Howard actually smiled at the notion. He turned to Bernadette who smiled and rolled her eyes.

Sheldon leaned over closer to Amy, his nose making contact with her hair. For a moment, Amy forgot to breath.

"Will you come by my classroom after your meeting tomorrow, and tell me how things went?" Sheldon whispered in her ear, and Amy visibly shivered. Sheldon noticed the way her body shook, and wondered if that was due to the cool temperature of the restaurant.

"Um…yes. I will." Amy whispered in return, nodding her head but purposely avoiding his eyes.

The waiter brought the check, and the party started to pitch in their money. Amy reached into her purse, producing a twenty dollar bill. She handed it across the table to Leonard, but Sheldon gently brought her hand back to her lap.

"I'd like to pay for you, Amy. Please put your money away."

She barely heard his soft words, and would have thought she was imagining things. Amy opened her mouth to protest, but one look at his face made her stop. Sheldon looked over to her, meeting her gaze steadily. His ever pale features had a ruddy glow to them, and his eyes were clear and so blue.

"Are you sure?" She whispered, stunned that he would do this. And on a night that wasn't date night. It seemed to her, he had spent _way_ too much money on her already. Evidenced by the diamonds sitting on her dresser at home.

Sheldon simply nodded, not saying anything.

"Alright, Sheldon. Thank you. That is very sweet of you. But you don't have to."

Sheldon handed his and Amy's share to Leonard, sitting back in his chair and folding his arms in front of him. The matter seemed closed, so Amy mimicked his position and sat back as well.

"I know I don't _have_ to, Amy. But I _want_ to. You…deserve it." He said softly. Amy swallowed, the tone of his voice touching her deeply.

Their eyes lingered on each other, and the tension seemed to grow even more.

Returning back to Los Robles, the foursome trudged their way up to the fourth floor. Leonard and Penny held hands while Sheldon and Amy walked side by side behind them. They dared to glance in each other's directions; each time their eyes connected seemed to add fuel to a fire neither one was aware was building.

When they reached their destination, Penny dragged Leonard towards 4b.

"Well, goodnight guys. It was great being all together again," Penny said.

"Goodnight," Leonard intoned, shooting Sheldon and Amy a smile before disappearing behind Penny's door.

The pair remained motionless in front of 4a, staring at each other intently.

"Thank you for walking me to my door, Amy. You didn't have to walk up all of these stairs."

Amy looked down shyly.

"That's alright, Sheldon. Thank you for inviting me along tonight."

Sheldon cocked his head, puzzled at her words.

"Of course I'd invite you, Amy. You are my girlfriend. Where else would you be, but at my side?"

Amy smiled at him. He was looking at her so earnestly.

"Yes," She whispered. "Of course. But I want to also thank you for paying for my meal. That was very sweet."

Sheldon frowned at Amy's formal tone. She shouldn't be thanking him for something that he, as her boyfriend, should willingly offer.

'_Ah, but you haven't in all of these years, have you Cooper? Even on your anniversary, you made Amy split the check. How very cavalier of you…'_

He knew the reason then. He just didn't want to face it. Paying for that meal meant they were bonded. It was the man's place to pay for his woman. That is what his Pop-Pop would always say. Sheldon knew it was his last morsel of independence, so that he could pretend he was a free agent. Like they were still friends. Even after he made her sign that relationship agreement. Even after he asked _her_ to be his girlfriend.

What in the ever loving hell was wrong with him?

Sheldon shut his eyes, anger welling up inside of him. The emotions bombarding him made him uneasy. What was happening to his carefully constructed façade of indifference? Was he truly turning into the hippie he always feared he'd become, letting down his emotional guard?

Too embarrassed and ashamed to face Amy, he turned sideways and rubbed his door with his palm. Amy simply stood still, leaning against his door and watching him with a concerned expression.

"Are you alright, Sheldon? I was worried about you tonight."

Her voice was so gentle and caring. The displeasure he felt at himself reached new heights.

_She _was worried about _him_?

"I'm sorry you were worried, Amy. Don't be. It's not your place to keep having to rescue me from myself. I am very sorry about earlier, if I made you feel uncomfortable," He forced out, looking everywhere but at her.

Amy reached out, putting a warm hand upon Sheldon's arm. He relished the feeling. Lately, all she had to do was touch him, and he became unglued.

"You are my boyfriend, Sheldon. It _is_ my place to rescue you. And you didn't upset me earlier. I'm sorry if it seemed you did. I can see you are tired, so I will let you go. Goodnight." She said quietly, turning on her heel to leave.

Sheldon didn't think, he just reacted. Allowing her to leave now would only further this awkward rift and he couldn't have that. She had made it down three steps before Sheldon stopped her.

"Amy, don't go," He said urgently, climbing down six steps until he was eye level with her. Seeing eye to eye with him without having to crane her neck was a strange experience. She stood still, hand gripping her purse as she waited for Sheldon to elaborate.

"Yes?" She asked softly.

"I…can I…would you mind if I kissed you…goodnight?"

Amy gasped as she watched the emotions play out on Sheldon's face.

"But…it's not date night," She stuttered, cursing herself at once for her stupidity. Sheldon looked crushed that once again, she refused his advances. She hurried to reassure him, by closing the gap between them.

"No…I just meant that I know you like things structured. But of course you can kiss me, Sheldon. You never have to ask," She whispered, and Sheldon gulped. Giving him free reign to kiss her was something he wasn't sure he should have, he thought darkly.

"But…I can't just go around kissing you any old time I feel like it, Amy. It's not in the relationship agreement." He said, his tone shocked. Amy grinned.

"Of course you can, Sheldon. Any old time. I give you permanent permission. And the agreement can always be amended. You can kiss me every time the whim comes upon you, if you'd like."

Sheldon stared deeply at her, trying to understand. If that were so, then why did she pull away earlier?

When he finally nodded his head and stepped even closer to her, Amy let out a sigh of relief. His eyes remained open until their foreheads made contact, both pairs sliding shut at the same time.

"Maybe this isn't such a good idea," He whispered, rubbing his nose along her cheek. "Deviating from our normal routine." He hastily added.

"You've never had a bad idea, Sheldon." She whispered back, inclining her nose and doing the same to him.

Sheldon gasped at her compliment. It never failed to undo him whenever she gave him one. It made him feel…fearless.

Placing her hands on his shoulders, she leaned in and waited. She didn't have to wait long. Sheldon lowered his head, catching her lips with his own. The plushness of his mouth was too much for her. As she always did once Sheldon's lips were molded to hers, she found herself wanting more. Moving his lips over hers in the most delicate way, she was entranced when he opened his mouth slightly and she could feel his velvety tongue lapping at her bottom lip.

'_Oh, dear God'_, She thought in a daze, moaning as Sheldon wrapped both of his arms around her and pulled her even closer, if that were possible. His hands grazed a path from her neck to her lower back, relishing her sighs and whimpers as his hands finally settled on her hips.

Time began to feel suspended as they embraced; Amy having enough presence of mind to actually participate this time. Her hands slid down his biceps gently before reaching around him to grip his waist. The groan he released as she aligned her body against his made her tremble. Sheldon slid his tongue into her mouth to explore with abandon, and Amy thought she would lose her reasoning altogether. Not once had he _ever_ kissed her this way, and the feelings it evoked frightened her; from famine to feast in the span of ten seconds. She nibbled on his full bottom lip hungrily, nipping and then soothing the sting with her tongue. Sheldon moaned loudly.

"Sheldon," She rasped, his name spoken on her lips in_ that_ voice making him want to drag her up the stairs and to his bed. The urge to do just that nearly left him weak.

'_Dear Lord, what is happening to me?_' He wondered frantically.

With herculean strength, he tore himself away from Amy and held her at a safe distance. Her eyes were closed, her lips swollen and red, and her face rosy and flushed. When the eyes he loved so much opened and focused on him, he saw it plain as day. Desire.

Desire for _him_.

Sheldon's heart thumped wildly against his ribs. His Amy, his beautiful Amy…_desired_ him.

"Amy," He whispered shakily, staring at her in wonder. They gazed at each other, breathing heavily.

"Yes?" She gasped, shaken herself.

A slow grin began to form on his lips.

"That was nice. _More_ than nice," Sheldon whispered. Amy answered his grin with one of her own.

"Good." She answered, her eyes glittering. Sheldon cocked his head, his eidetic memory conjuring up a parallel conversation. So long ago. A lifetime ago…

Amy's lips broke out in a charming smile. He found himself smiling as well. They stood there, smiling stupidly at each other and it felt so incredibly right. Both blushing, both flustered, both awkward.

It was the best feeling in the whole world.

"I guess I should…go. It's late." She said, and Sheldon nodded.

"Yes, it is late. You should go." He agreed, yet he didn't release the hold he had on her hips. _When did my hands stray there? _He wondered_._

"I'm going," She confirmed, moving her legs slightly. Sheldon reluctantly released her, his hands feeling instantly bereft.

"Goodnight, Sheldon."

"Goodnight, Amy," He whispered, eyes following her as she trekked down the last few steps. When she reached the landing, she turned to find Sheldon gazing at her like she was a prize. Perhaps she was, she thought with giddiness.

"Good luck tomorrow teaching class, Sheldon. I know you will do well. I will stop by after my meeting to see how things went."

Sheldon stared at her in a daze. He completely forgot about tomorrow. All he could do was think about Amy's lips on his own.

"Thank you, Amy."

He walked inside his apartment in a near trance, sitting himself down in his spot like dead weight.

'_That was the most amazing thing I've ever felt_,' He thought in shock. And that was saying something, since he didn't think their kiss on the train could be topped.

Oh boy, was he wrong.

Sheldon put his fingers on his lips, rubbing gently. They were sensitive and a bit swollen. Had Amy actually…_bitten_ his lower lip? His heart accelerated as his perfect mind captured the memory. Yes…she had. And it didn't hurt. It felt…erotic and wonderful.

He never imagined kissing could be like that. Never imagined he would _want_ to kiss someone like that. Worrying about germs was nowhere to be found as he held Amy in his arms. It was scary, to be sure. But this was Amy. _His_ Amy. And his Amy always made everything better.

His mind awhirl, he made his way on unsteady legs to his bedroom. For the first time in his life…Sheldon wished he wasn't alone.


	16. Chapter 16

~Chapter 16~

A/N- The response to this story has overwhelmed me. I cannot tell you how happy I am that you are enjoying this love story. This is the best fandom here, and you all are wonderful. Period. Your kind words and encouragement warm my heart.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…What would I do without your smart mouth? Drawing me in and you kicking me out…You've got my head spinning. No kidding. I can't pin you down. What's going on in that beautiful mind? I'm on your magical mystery ride. And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright…" John Legend – All of Me

Sheldon sat down at his desk as the last of the grad students filtered out. He had taught seven classes today, and he was exhausted. He was happy the day was over. Although, he had to admit it was a good one.

"Don't forget the assignment on Caltech's own Dr. Fritz Zwicky is due Wednesday, ladies and gentleman."

A collective groan echoed up the stairs leading from the classroom, and Sheldon smirked. There was something about being in a position of power that Sheldon found pleasing. He never minded when he was a student being sprung a 'pop quiz', because Sheldon Cooper was always prepared.

Loving academia as much as he did, he never understood people's aversion to test taking. Being in the position of Jr. Professor now, he got a first row view of how much work it is, preparing for a class. He now had a newfound respect for Professors.

Since accepting this promotion, even though at first he felt strong armed into it, Sheldon couldn't deny he was actually happy with the trajectory his career was headed. Formerly detesting teaching, and only submitting to lecturing when forced to, he was pleasantly surprised how his feelings were changing positively on the matter.

He also found he enjoyed sharing his views on Physics in all of its forms with up and coming minds. They seemed to respect him more than at his previous attempts at teaching, and for that he was grateful. No nasty Facebook messages, no scathing Twitter remarks displaying 'Die, Cooper, Die'.

Of course Penny and her coaching on, as she so eloquently phrased it, _'How not to be a douche bag'_ helped, as did Howard, Leonard and Rajesh's selling him up to the grad students in the cafeteria. Sheldon realized that for all of their quirks, his three closest friends were respected within the hallowed halls of Caltech. He took a page from their book, putting his mega ego aside and trying to be 'One of the Gang'. It was working, obviously. While he would never consider himself an 'Average' guy, he was finding it beneficial to stop lording his achievements over the general populous.

Most of the Caltech students were aware of Dr. Sheldon Cooper and his genius IQ, but not so many were willing to sit in on his class. Sheldon knew he had a reputation for being difficult. When they heard how relaxed he had been lately, quite a few of them jumped at the opportunity to learn from a master Physicist. Mrs. Davis had pointed out to him that letting his talent and intelligence languish when there were so many who could benefit from it was counterproductive.

Never one to back down from a challenge, he threw himself into this new endeavor heart and soul.

He felt better than he had in a long time. His career was finally coming together. He also found it easier to discover formula's and finish equations when they weren't his entire focus. Working on Dark Matter was really getting his juices going. And training others to open their minds and realize their potential was freeing for him, and helped him see Quantum Physics in a new light.

It was still too early to determine if this was the path Sheldon would choose to take, as this was a temporary one year assignment. But he had to admit he was enjoying himself immensely. Five years ago, he would _never_ have admitted such a thing. There was a big reason for this change. One he had only recently admitted to himself.

Five years ago, he hadn't yet met Amy Farrah Fowler.

Sheldon sighed, throwing down the pen he held and swiveling in his chair to face the enormous green board behind him. It held a vast array of equations, and it simultaneously pleased and annoyed him that he could figure out any one of those, with very little help, yet he might never figure out the mystery that was his girlfriend.

His mind wandered to last night at his apartment, and the tender moment they shared whilst looking through the telescope. He wanted to kiss her more than he wanted breath, and was certain she wanted it, as well. Sheldon saw it in her eyes before she pulled away. If he were being honest, he did not like the feeling of rejection he experienced at her denial. But afterwards…oh Lord, afterwards…

That kiss in his stairwell changed everything. He wondered if the exceptional day he had was due to that.

It was more than simply _wanting_ to kiss her. Ever since her illness, it felt like a giant weight was crushing him into the ground. He couldn't breathe, and found that when he was with Amy, he could. Remembering his dream with Arthur wasn't helping, either. It seemed as though lately, Amy invaded his every thought; both waking and asleep. A voice in his head was nagging at him, taunting him to admit what the reasoning was. He was so afraid to give in, name what exactly it was. Yet he didn't have the strength to fight it any longer. That much was obvious.

She had helped him over the years, in so many ways, to bring him forward socially. Taking her cues, as awkward as she herself had once been, had been effortless. He teased her on occasion about how she was goading him to participate in the social sciences, yet he secretly relished each instance.

He was never good at public speaking; always acting bored or condescendingly, his listeners soon growing weary and hostile. Yet since engaging in the social niceties of give and take, Sheldon realized how much more receptive the students and faculty alike were warming to him. He had never before realized how much he wanted people to like him. It previously didn't matter. But now…everything was different.

His summer of discovery last year taught him a valuable lesson. No man is an island, in and of himself. Although he needed to get away, simply _had_ to…getting away solved nothing. His problems were still there when he returned.

On top of that, he had hurt the one person who had always been there for him. Seeing the hurt in her eyes was the hardest thing he'd ever had to witness. The worst part? He was responsible for putting it there.

He told himself repeatedly over the years, that he was better than his father. George Cooper made his wife cry. George Cooper made his children cower. George Cooper made the neighbor folk quake. People may have respected George Cooper, but they didn't _like_ him.

Sheldon _never_ wanted to be _that_ guy.

Yet he certainly had become a younger version of him. At least, where Amy was concerned.

He saw it then, on Valentine's Day when the only thing that prompted him to give her the kiss she so richly deserved was anger. He saw it the night he left, storming out of her apartment and slamming her door _after _he graciously mocked her. And he saw it, the morning he broke into her apartment, ready to rake her over the coals while all the while she lay bleeding on the floor.

So lost in thought was he, that he didn't hear the quiet footfalls of his minds musings.

Amy stepped into the massive circular classroom, catching a glimpse of Sheldon down below at his desk. His back was to her, as he was seemingly engrossed in his board. She thought of alerting him to her presence, but something stopped her. Taking the opportunity to silently observe him, she sat down at one of the half desks at the very top step.

She had a long meeting with her department chair, discussing her pending return to work. Everyone was so kind to her; they expressed their concern with how she was recovering and assured her that they would be there for her every step of the way back. They gave her some incredible news that she just had to share with Sheldon. Glancing at her watch, she noted Sheldon's last class of the day was ending. Perfect timing, she thought, anxious to see him. She had promised to come visit him once her meeting was over.

The University was abuzz with Sheldon's success as a Professor. He had long scoffed at having a teaching position, yet since being promoted, the title of _Professor_ seemingly did something to his confidence. To Amy's estimation, Sheldon wasn't simply theorizing principles anymore. He was actually given the trust to teach them to the up and coming Physicists of tomorrow. That was a huge deal. She wondered if Sheldon realized how huge.

The fact that someone like President Siebert trusted Sheldon enough to employ him as a Professor was amazing. Their rocky history was no secret, nor was their public duel of wills this past summer over his wanting to leave String Theory. Amy was so proud of Sheldon for sticking to his guns and taking the high road. It was a side of him she had never seen before. She found it highly appealing, him taking charge and producing something tangible- not simply to win, but because he was _right_.

Amy's heart constricted as she wondered what the future held for the both of them. Never in her wildest dreams could she have imagined what would happen last night really happened. Her heart soared like an eagle when he himself asked for a kiss. And heavens, what a kiss it was. She lay awake for hours remembering it, holding on to it, trying to ingrain it in her mind forever.

She watched Sheldon, covertly, admiring his graceful and lanky physique. She heard him sigh a couple of times, and she wondered what had captured his attention so intently. He leaned back in his chair, his head resting almost on the desk as he stared off into oblivion. He looked deep in thought.

But, to her increasing realization, that wasn't _all_ he looked.

He looked so…sexy. A fact that tugged at her heartstrings and made her feel things she hadn't allowed herself to feel in a while.

Being Sheldon's girlfriend was not an easy undertaking. She learned to suppress the natural urge to want to throw him down and have her wicked way with him, because she had to. Yet each and every time she was faced with his overt appeal, she felt like a withering flower about to be crushed by the effects of the wind. He wielded this power over her, and didn't even know it.

An involuntary 'Hoo' escaped her, and she cursed herself.

Damn Sheldon's Vulcan like hearing, she decided, when the object of her affection suddenly turned around, looking up and meeting her gaze. They were at least sixty feet away from one another, yet the cord which connected them together was tightly wound. A fleeting look of delighted surprise crossed Sheldon's features. He slowly stood up, coming to stand parallel to his desk as he waited for her to approach. Amy was able to take in his full appearance now, and she broke out in a cold sweat.

Since becoming a Junior Professor, he had abandoned his usual attire of khaki's and superhero t-shirts while teaching class. Trousers and fitted buttoned downs replaced his usual plaid suits. Sheldon looked older, more mature. And most _definitely_ handsome. She wasn't accustomed to seeing him look so professional.

While she felt he looked handsome in whatever he wore, she couldn't deny the feelings of attraction at seeing him attired so classically. His pleated trousers hugged his hips and thighs, and his shirt was rolled up at the sleeves expressing strong forearms. She noted the pale lavender color and knew for certain it would turn his cobalt blue eyes the loveliest shade of violet.

Amy couldn't suppress the fissure of desire that shot down her spine as he stared at her in unabashed curiosity. Feeling foolish, she realized she had to say something. Anything.

Rising, she traversed the winding steps leading down to the main part of the theatre. The closer she got, the more intense his gaze became.

"Hello, Dr. Cooper. My meeting ended a little while ago. How was class today?" She asked brightly.

Was that her voice? It sounded high and nervous. Probably because it was.

Sheldon balanced from foot to foot, licking his suddenly dry lips.

"It was fine. How did your meeting go?" He asked, turning the focus back to her. His eyes roamed over her appreciatively.

"It went well, thank you." She said sweetly.

Amy managed a faint smile, looking behind him to his work on the boards. Sheldon tore his gaze away from her, following her interest.

"Impressive," She murmured, motioning to the board. Sheldon nodded absently.

"Yes…it is I suppose. It's amazing how much more focused I am these days, since making Cosmology my field of study. The subject of Dark Matter is just amazing."

Amy grinned at his familiar exuberance, blushing madly when he turned back to her and caught her gaze sweeping over him. Sheldon cleared his throat, feeling suddenly warm.

Amy looked lovely today; dressed differently than he had ever seen her. The sudden pang of desire that settled deep in his belly was not an altogether new sensation, but it almost knocked the wind out of him. As did her presence in his classroom.

She was wearing what he believed was called a 'little black dress'; square neckline, short sleeves, slightly gathered at the waistline and dropping to her knees alluringly. A pencil thin belt ran the length of her tiny waist, setting off her hourglass figure nicely. She wore black pumps at a respectable, safe height for her. No cardigan was to be found today, and to Sheldon's utter fascination, no tights. Her long hair was styled in big, bouncy curls, cascading down her back and her collarbones in a very feminine way. But what completely floored him, was the fact he could see her eyes completely unobscured. Her glasses were gone. She must have been wearing contact lenses, he surmised. Yet all that registered was the fact her eyes were a deep shade of moss green.

He had missed those eyes while she was asleep; their mischievous sparkle and raw honesty. He felt a deep sorrow when he thought he might never see them focused on him again with admiration and mirth.

This wasn't the first time Sheldon was stunned by Amy's appearance. For years now, she could be wearing nothing but a simple cardigan and skirt, and he would be struck dumb. But to see her looking so…spectacular…did something to him that he wasn't prepared for.

Sheldon slid his suddenly rapt gaze from her body down to her shoes. Her dainty toes peeked out of the peep toe tops. His eyes traced her calf muscle up to her knee, and by the time he reached her thigh, Sheldon knew he was in trouble.

Trouble, because all he could picture was taking that leg and hitching it up across his.

_Oh, Lord…_

"Sheldon, are you alright?" She asked, and edge of concern in her voice and Sheldon visibly shook himself out of his stupor.

"Yes. I'm fine, thank you for asking." He managed, thrusting his hands inside his pockets as he stood still, gazing at her again. "You look…different today." He gulped, and Amy shrugged.

"I thought for my meeting I would look presentable. I've felt like a nursing home patient for weeks, now. It felt good to dress up a little. Why? Too much? Do I look-…"

Sheldon cut her off.

"You look…amazing." He said firmly, yet the tender tone of his voice pleased her.

Taken aback, Amy smiled demurely. "Thank you, Sheldon."

_What is the matter with me? _He thought wildly, holding her bemused stare.

"So…class today? How was it?"

Sheldon gathered himself as best he could.

"Class was good. No incidents today, and the students really seem to be enjoying my teaching. Who would have thought that?" He asked, adding a self-deprecating laugh Amy found irresistible. She chuckled as well, the movement making her hair bounce. Sheldon watched as it did so in enchantment.

_Am I losing my mind? I must be losing my mind. Watching her hair bounce enchants me?_

"Congratulations, Sheldon. I knew you could succeed with this. I've always believed in you. You are the most brilliant man I've ever known. It's high time you were rewarded for your efforts. I'm very proud of you." Amy whispered, her eyes turning suspiciously glassy.

Sheldon's eyes widened at Amy's heartfelt words. Edging closer to her, he looked down at her with a soft expression.

"You are proud of me, Amy?" He asked her in astonishment. His vulnerable voice melted her on the spot and made her tremble. Nodding her head, she found herself mirroring Sheldon's earlier stance of resting foot to foot.

"Of course I am, Sheldon. You know that, right? I hope I never led you to believe otherwise. I know the last few months have been…overwhelming for you. But I never gave up faith in you."

He continued to gaze at her.

"Faith? You have faith in me?" He asked her, stunned.

The look he was giving her send her pulse racing. Amy felt her knees beginning to wobble, and she reached out to lay a steadying hand upon his desk.

"Yes," She whispered truthfully, nodding her head in the affirmative.

He gaped at her, awestruck. This woman, this wonderful, brilliant, lovely woman…had faith in him. Did anyone _ever_ have faith in him before? His parents, his grandparents? Perhaps. But that was different. They had to out of obligation. Amy had no such obligation. Yet she freely gave him her belief. Her faith.

Her _love_.

And he had thrown it back in her face. Stomped on it, like a dirty rag. Mocked it. Mocked _her_.

"…_She is the key to your happiness…"_

Sheldon gulped, feeling tears of his own gather in his blue eyes. He didn't deserve her.

"I just…" He began, pursing his lips and reaching down on the desk to draw imaginary patterns. Amy noted his hand skirted dangerously close to hers.

"Just?" Amy prompted, stepping two steps closer.

"I just thought that you were disappointed in me. Ashamed of me, even, for having such a meltdown about String Theory. That night…you and Bernadette lied to us…I just thought…" He stopped, unable to revisit the hurt he felt at her lying to him, or Amy's hurt in return over his leaving with Penny.

Amy lay her hand on top of Sheldon's, stroking it tenderly.

"Sheldon…no. How could you ever think such a thing? I only wanted to help you. I…" But she stopped, terrified to give him the wrong idea again and set him off. The last time she tried to _help _him, he told her off and stormed out of her life for two months.

Sheldon seemed to realize where her train of thought was headed, because he frowned when she refused to elaborate.

"Amy…"

"I'm afraid to upset you, Sheldon. I don't want to pressure you, or make you feel you must leave again," She rushed out, biting her lip at her confession.

Her response, while no less expected, shook him.

"I didn't…I don't…I won't," He said with conviction. "Amy…I am _not_ leaving again. I swear to you," He whispered.

Amy laughed shakily. "I will hold you to that promise after I tell you what I found out today," She said quietly.

Tilting his head, Sheldon frowned at her as her words sunk in. He raised his brows, urging her to continue.

"I had a meeting today with Vice President Simmons, the Neuroscience Chair of my department. He has been very pleased with my work lately…well, before my illness, and has spoken to my former supervisor at my lab at UCLA," She said, leaving her words dangling in the air between them.

Sheldon took a step back, his tall frame visibly hunching before her. He didn't like where this was going. Not one bit. He swallowed so hard that Amy heard his Adams apple bob noisily.

"What did they say?" He asked quietly, fearing the worst. Fearing the obvious.

That she was leaving Caltech.

That she in essence, was leaving _him_.

The idea made him almost laugh with irony. Little over a year ago, when Amy was recruited to Caltech, he initially worried about his girlfriend working at the same place as he. As it turned out, it had never once been a problem. It had actually been wonderful. Many times they had shared lunch together, and it made him feel safe and happy knowing his Amy was across the campus in her lab, conducting studies and wowing the field of Neuroscience with her brilliance. The pride he felt at that was palpable.

Now, as he waited for her to elaborate, he worried that his worst fear was going to happen.

"Well, they want me to head up a research team that will be examining the prefrontal cortex of the brain and how addictions originate. There will be presenters there from both UCLA and Berkley. The project will last a tentative three months. If we can successfully trace the data…there is talk our group has a decent chance of being elected for a Nobel Prize in Neuroscience."

Amy rushed out the last words as though one sentence. Admitting to Sheldon that she herself may win a Nobel Prize, and before him no less…wasn't something she relished doing. Partly because she knew how much he dreamt of winning the coveted prize, and partly because she knew how competitive he could be. The last thing she wanted to do right now, was fight with Sheldon. She waited for him to react. Any reaction. But none was forthcoming. She did notice, however, how his eyes slightly misted over. She didn't know if that was good or bad, but the fact he wasn't exploding was a good sign, wasn't it?

Sheldon stared at Amy in awe. A feeling of intense admiration washed over him.

A Nobel. For Amy. _His_ Amy. Winning a Nobel Prize. Deservedly so. For her hard work. For her brilliance. For _her_.

In that Chapel at the hospital, he begged whomever was listening to spare Amy, to bring her back. That the world needed her brilliance and her intelligence. It dawned on him that if Amy hadn't made it through, more than he would have felt her loss. The entire world would have mourned his little lady's demise. It sobered him instantly.

Backing up, Sheldon kept his eye on her until he felt his back hit the board. Even then, he didn't break eye contact. He watched as her beautiful eyes searched his face for any hint of reaction. Finally, a smile began to dawn on his face that reminded her of the rising sun. Big, bright, and full of light. Witnessing it made Amy lose her breath.

"Oh, Amy," He whispered. "That is just…brilliant. I am so happy for you."

And he _was_ happy, he realized with something akin to wonder. He couldn't have been prouder of her if he tried.

Amy didn't know what she expected when told him, but this reaction was definitely not it. No tantrums, no yelling, and no jealous tirades. He simply stood there, his blue eyes shining at her. Shyly, she lowered her gaze, stepping closer to him.

"It's not a definite, Sheldon. Simply a hypothesis. But it would be agreeable."

A loud guffaw escaped Sheldon, and Amy did a double take.

"Agreeable?" He bellowed, the disbelief in his voice ringing loudly in the tiled classroom.

"Amy, _agreeable_ is when you get a good seat at the movie theatre. Or when you order a burger and they prepare it correctly. Winning a Nobel Prize is most assuredly more than _agreeable_," He chuckled, and Amy laughed with him- enjoying this rare moment of happiness with her boyfriend.

When was the last time they laughed together? Truly laughed…belly splitting, tear inducing laughter. Amy realized, it had been awhile.

Sheldon realized it as well, as his eyes roamed over the woman he had come to cherish.

God, it was so good to see her smiling again. He missed that. He missed _her_. His laughter slowly began to die, but Amy's demure smile kept him smiling as well.

"Congratulations, Dr. Fowler. I wish you all the best," He said in a gentlemanly way, bowing before her in a grand gesture she found charming. It reminded her of something Mr. Knightley would have done for Emma, or Mr. Darcy with Elizabeth. The fact Sheldon Cooper even had it in him to behave so proper floored her. Of course, she shouldn't have been surprised. He was raised with manners by a southern mother, after all.

"Thank you, Dr. Cooper. I will do my best to make you proud." She said in jest, and at the serious look Sheldon shot her way, she wondered if she shouldn't have.

Sheldon stepped up to her, taking her hand gently.

"You always make me proud, Amy. Always. I am…very proud to be your fella."

Sheldon winced as the words made their way past his lips. He didn't want to be presumptuous, but he knew the time had come to lay their cards on the table. After what he had put her through for the last six months…hell, four years- he owed it to her to be honest.

"I…I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable," He said quietly, not able to stand the silence as it stretched on. "Last night…after what happened on the stairs…I didn't want to assume your feelings hadn't…changed."

Amy's eyes watered as she recognized the fear in Sheldon's voice. Her heart felt heavy, tight. Without even realizing it, he had tread upon the area she most needed to visit. Tentatively, she looked up at him through her lashes. His old fashioned sentiment touched her greatly. But she had to know, after all of this time, if they still had a future together. _Had_ her feelings changed? One look in his eyes told her that no…they could never change. She loved him even more now than she ever did.

"My feelings haven't changed, Sheldon. The question is, have yours? Are you still my fella? Do you want to be?"

Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat. Amy's eyes looked positively fearful; wide and focused completely upon him as if his answer was the difference between life and death.

In that moment he knew without a shadow of a doubt, it was. For both of them.

Amy was invading his private thoughts at all hours of the day and night, refusing to be placed back into the box he had always set aside for her. Amy Farrah Fowler had outgrown the box, and her mere presence now overwhelmed him. Yet for all of her power, she was still just a scared, innocent woman who had never been in love before.

Before _him_.

It wasn't supposed to be this way. He wasn't supposed to fall in love. He wasn't supposed to want to be with her day and night, year after year, placing her needs above his own. It wasn't supposed to happen. And yet, happen it did. He could no more deny his love for her than deny the Theory of Relativity.

No wonder she was afraid to talk to him, about anything of import. He could see, from her point of view, how nervous she was to even voice an opinion. Sheldon had had enough. What had he done to her? Making her so rattled that the slightest touch sent her running like a scared rabbit.

Stepping into her space, Sheldon engulfed her in a hug so tightly that she stumbled against him. Her arms flailed about clumsily for a few seconds, unsure where to land. He held on to her, running his arms from her soft hair down to the beautiful dip of her waist. It felt like heaven to touch her again, and when she softened against him and gently placed her hands on his back, Sheldon thought he would burst into tears.

"Amy," He whispered, burying his nose in her apple scented hair and closing his eyes. She slowly melted against him. "Of course I am still your fella. Please…don't give up on me. I'm trying so hard." He beseeched her.

Amy nodded, burrowing her head against Sheldon's chest where she could feel his heartbeat thundering in her ear. He stroked her hair tenderly. He had never before held her so closely, and the feeling was euphoric.

"I know you're trying, Sheldon. And I…I love you all the more for it." She said with feeling. "I won't give up on you. I promise." She whispered, helpless as Sheldon drew his forehead to hers. His cool, sweet breath rushed over her like a tornado. She wanted to claim him. Devour him….

He loved her. But she had to let him decide.

And decide, Sheldon did. His eyes bore into hers, asking permission to a question that only had one eternal answer.

Yes. Always, yes.

Sheldon captured her lips in a passionate kiss, one that left her growing light headed. He tilted her head back with the force of it, clumsy and imperfect.

She had never felt anything so heady, so wonderful…in all of her life. It left her breathless.

"Oh Lord...Amy," He rasped helplessly. His lips were soft and warm, plush and full. Amy wanted to drown in his kiss. Slanting her mouth to gain purchase, she was enraptured when she felt Sheldon's velvety tongue sweep across her bottom lip, begging for access. Her moan of appreciation echoed out in the space between them, and Sheldon answered her with a moan of his own.

Yes. This was what was missing all along. This feeling of utter… rapture. Like jumping off a mountain, he let himself go. Let himself feel.

It had always been there, hidden beneath the surface of rigid rules and steadfast routines. Of lies, secrets, and denials. Never allowed to express itself. How could he have hidden it away for so long he wondered? There was nothing he could do now to stem the tide.

Backing her up, he maneuvered her to a sitting position on his desk, coming to stand between her slightly parted knees. Amy gasped as he yanked her back to him, the look in his eyes feral and pained.

She had never seen him so out of control before, and although it slightly scared her, the shock of desire it sent to her core couldn't be denied. Amy shuddered, her shaking body alerting Sheldon to the fact that she was aroused. He gazed at her, finally and truthfully taking in every detail of this woman he had so long desired.

She knew him better than anyone. And she wanted him anyway. That in and of itself was a miracle.

She was beautiful, strong, loyal, brilliant, and kind.

She was funny, logical, sweet, and desirable.

She was everything he had never known he needed or wanted.

She was perfect. Perfect for _him_.

Slowly, ever so slowly…he brushed her lips with his own. Sensually, gently, wetly…sliding deeper. Deeper still. His tongue stroking her lip, melding with her own tongue in a tango of slow seduction. He was learning her. Studying her. Mastering her. And she was mastering him.

Stepping closer, sliding his arm around her back until it reached her hip and squeezing possessively. The other arm sliding up her clavicle, her neck, until his large hand slid into her hair and cupped her skull gently. Amy tipped her head back, and Sheldon took that as a direct invitation. Slowly kissing a path from her mouth to her neck, he began a languid journey down her jawline until he reached the sensitive skin under her ear. Kissing her there with care, he nibbled on her tender skin and reached up to take the lobe of her ear between his lips. Amy gasped and clutched his biceps tightly. The feeling that evoked inside of him was one of desperation.

"Sheldon," She whimpered, those two syllables sounding like warm honey flowing over him. He closed his eyes to gather his wits about him before he did something crazy.

Like take her right here on his desk.

He snapped out of his love induced stupor, feeling unhinged and out of control. He _had _to find control.

"Amy," He groaned, swallowing deeply and trying to put a bit of distance between them. Amy wasn't having it, though, and slid her hands from his arms to his lower back, effectively locking him against her.

Sheldon stared at her, transfixed, as the magnitude of what was happening between them hit him full force. He wanted her.

_Right now._

It both thrilled and scared him. Where was this feeling hiding? But she deserved better than this. A groping session in his classroom, in the full light of day. Anyone could happen by, compromising her. He refused to tarnish her that way. She was his woman. She deserved more. He unlocked her arms from around his back, moving out of her grasp.

Amy was panting, staring at him in a mixture of hurt and confusion. He _had_ to erase that look. Immediately.

"I...Amy…I've never felt anything like this," He admitted shakily. His eyes beseeched hers for help. He was a babe in the ways of romance, and felt vulnerable. He swallowed nervously as her eyes penetrated his, and the raw honesty she saw in his making her shiver.

He motioned with his hand around the classroom. "This isn't the time nor the place for this. And truthfully…I don't know what I'm doing. Perhaps we need to slow down."

Amy had to bow to Sheldon's logic. She had simply lost herself in the moment; in Sheldon's kiss, and his touch. And oh, God…losing herself had never felt so wonderful. But once again, she yielded to his sensibility.

"Yes. I agree…Dr. Cooper," She whispered, knowing full well the use of his title would make him crazy. She didn't care. She had waited years to feel this way, and to have it reciprocated. If it caused him a sliver of discomfort, so be it.

Sheldon glared at her in a lust filled haze.

Vixen.

He had known, from the first, that she would lead him astray. He shook his head, stepping back to put some much needed distance between them.

Sheldon walked a circuit around his desk, chest heaving and lungs panting as he purposely avoided her gaze.

"_Dear Lord, what is happening to me?"_ He asked himself, running his hands through his hair like a madman. His pulse was thumping wildly and he tried to tamp down his excitement that was currently threatening to make itself known.

Amy's eyes roamed over her boyfriend in open appreciation. Mussed hair, swollen lips, wrinkled shirt. Yes, she decided…Arousal was a good look for Sheldon Cooper.

This was overwhelming. Long dormant feelings were bubbling up to the surface, threatening to smother him. He knew his feelings for Amy were changing. But this…

All he wanted to do was knock everything off his desk and take her within an inch of her life. He had no idea how to deal with this, or why all of a sudden these feelings were taking hold of his usual logic. Seeing her now, flushed and wanting him, logic took a jump out of the window. Taking a deep steadying breath, Sheldon closed his eyes.

"I have papers to grade and a big exam on Friday to prepare for. I have a lot of work to do tonight. I need to focus…concentrate."

Amy sat motionless, waiting with baited breath for him to continue. Finally opening his eyes, Sheldon met her look with one of determination.

"Tomorrow is…date night," He said matter-of-factly. Amy nodded, not sure where he was going with this.

"Leonard is spending the night at Penny's again. I will have the apartment to myself. Perhaps you would like to come over for dinner? I could cook for you. And then, if you are so inclined, you could help me prepare for the exam."

Amy's pulse raced as it dawned on her what Sheldon was saying. He wanted to be _alone _with her tomorrow night. No restaurant. Just them. And if she helped him with his work, they could have more time together for…other things.

"Yes... That sounds wonderful." She managed to get out, her mouth dry as the desert.

Sheldon nodded forcefully, suddenly finding the floor interesting. He needed to calm down. He needed to think.

"Alright, then. Will 7 work for you?" He asked as levelly as he could. Amy nodded, clearing her throat before forcing out the strained syllable.

"Yes."

"Very well." He said professionally, a faint smile appearing on his lips.

Sheldon watched with hooded eyes as Amy walked up the steps leading out of the classroom. Inevitably, his gaze fell to her posterior. He groaned low in his throat as he watched it sway.

"See you tomorrow?" She asked sweetly, and he nodded slowly.

"Einstein, give me strength," He whispered, his eyes following her until she was no longer there.

The die was cast. There would be no going back. Sheldon sat down and took a much needed breath. After silent moments of staring into the empty space, he realized with great relief that he would have it no other way.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Amy knocked on Penny's door, bottle of wine in hand. They had made plans for an impromptu girl's night tonight; nothing noteworthy except a drink and some banter. Yet after the day Amy had, the last thing she wanted to do surprisingly, was have an audience.

After leaving Sheldon, Amy practically sprinted to her car. She needed to be alone, to process what had just happened. Was she dreaming? Was she imagining things? Had she suffered another blow to the head? Pulling down her visor and staring at herself in the mirror, she threw that notion out.

Her face was flushed, her pupils blown, her lipstick gone. She looked like she had just been ravished.

And she had been! By Sheldon!

Sinking down into her seat, Amy giggled like a teenager. Lord, she never imagined Sheldon could lose control like that. Whatever had been going on in her taciturn boyfriends mind lately, this certainly wasn't what she expected.

Coming back to herself, she waited patiently for the door to be answered. It flung open, revealing a grinning Penny. Bernadette sat on the sofa, waving to her.

"Well, hello little vixen," Penny purred, and Amy's hackles immediately were raised.

"Vixen?" She questioned in confusion, her eyes narrowing.

Penny grabbed her hand, yanking her into the apartment and propelling her toward the sofa. She plopped down in a heap, just barely not dropping the wine bottle on the carpet.

"Oh don't play coy with me, missy. What happened today between you and Sheldon?" Penny asked slyly, her perfectly manicured eyebrow reaching the stratosphere.

Amy panicked. Had Sheldon told Leonard and Penny about what happened earlier? That didn't seem like something Sheldon would feel comfortable doing. Bernadette was watching her like a hawk. Amy felt like she was a lab monkey, being observed and categorized.

"What are you talking about?" She asked cautiously, shrugging off her coat to reveal the sexy but conservative dress underneath. Penny's eyes widened as she took in Amy's attire.

"No wonder he had a meltdown. Just look at you," Penny intoned, pointing to Amy in an accusatory fashion. Amy looked down at herself, confused.

"What about me? What's wrong with my dress?" Amy asked, indignation dripping in her tone. Penny rolled her eyes, dumbfounded.

"Nothing is wrong with it, Amy. It's just that Leonard said earlier when he picked up Sheldon from his class, he found him staring off into space with a dopey grin on his face. He said he called Sheldon's name three times, but Sheldon didn't even hear him. He was too busy _smiling_."

Penny drew out the last word, making it sound dirty. Amy couldn't help it. She blushed. That more than anything, drew the girls' attention.

"He finally broke down and told Leonard you stopped by to see him. And then you show up here dressed like this," She said, motioning to her clothing. Penny stared at her seriously, all joking gone.

"So you did you see him today?" She prodded gently, and Amy swallowed before nodding.

Penny blew a gust of air through her pursed lips.

"Well… if how you look is any indication, it was no wonder he looked like a lovelorn schoolboy. I know Sheldon has a thing for your mind, but for him to finally show he's attracted to your body, is…I mean, this is _Sheldon_ we are talking about."

Amy bit her lip, turning her head to avoid Penny's scrutiny.

Lovelorn schoolboy? Sheldon Cooper?

The idea he found her attractive in that way had her body quivering. Sheldon _did_ have all the outward signs of excitement. She was experiencing some feelings of her own, Sheldon just couldn't see them as easily. Remembering the feeling of his body pressed against hers made Amy's blood pound through her arteries.

"Okay, what is that blush about?" Bernadette whined.

Amy sighed.

"Look, guys…you are my closest friends. And I know it's the norm to disclose all about our…love lives. Normally, I would be jumping at the chance to tell you all about what happened in Sheldon's classroom. But I don't think he would appreciate me gossiping about it. And…I want to keep it just between the two of us. Please?"

The two women stared at her, mouths agape.

"Exactly _what_ happened in his classroom, Amy?" Bernie pressed.

"We just…we just…well," She fumbled, leaning back on the sofa gingerly.

Penny and Bernadette gave each other an incredulous stare.

"Whoa, whoa…back up. Are you telling us that Sheldon…and you…?"

Penny couldn't even finish the thought. Amy took a deep breath.

"No!" She hissed, shooting the women a chiding stare. "It wasn't like…that."

She purposely left out the part that it very nearly was.

"We…um…kissed. And he told me that um…" She faltered again, covering her eyes. God, this was embarrassing.

None of them were able to move, and Amy simply sat there. It was Bernadette who broke the silence.

"Can you elaborate on um?"

"Hey!" Penny chided their petite friend, shooting her a glare.

Bernie wasn't to be deterred, though.

"What? You were the one who dragged her in here to confess. And you get mad because I try to get the goods?"

Amy could not believe that they were dying to hear about her and Sheldon's…encounter. She watched the two blonds bicker back and forth like she was watching a tennis match.

"Girls, girls…stop it. I already told you, it's private. For now, anyway. Could we please just forget about Sheldon and me for tonight?"

Amy never thought she would have to be fighting off the girls for sex info. The notion made her smile.

"Ames…come on!" Penny whined, but Amy was steadfast.

"Well…I won't tell you everything. Sheldon wouldn't appreciate that. But I will say this- I know for a fact that Sheldon wants to move forward with me. Physically. Happy now?"

Penny and Bernadette looked at each other, then back to Amy.

"No." They said simultaneously. Amy rolled her eyes.

Two bottles of wine later, the three women sat around the living room relaxing lazily. Amy's dress was askew, penny took her shoes off, and Bernadette's cardigan was unbuttoned.

"This changes everything." Penny said reflectively, staring at the straw colored liquid in her glass.

Amy pondered that.

"How so?" She asked curiously.

Penny smiled warmly, tilting her head to smile at her best friend.

"Well, for one thing…a little over seven years ago, we were all living singly. None of knew each other, and now, look at us. Those four, lovable nerds are all in relationships. With actual women. And those women, us, are the luckiest in the Universe. And you, missy-"she pointed to her again- "you have done something that I never would have thought a mortal woman could pull off. You made Sheldon Cooper fall in love with you. That is…that is…." Penny searched for the right word, her eyes heavenward.

"Monumental?" Bernadette supplied, bringing a plate of nachos and some plates to the coffee table. Penny grinned like a Cheshire cat.

"Yep," Penny agreed, holding her wine glass up in toast. "Here's to monumental Sheldon and Amy."

It may have been the wine, it may have been the late hour. It may have even been the emotional day Amy had spent…but Penny's words struck a cord in her that she had previously never allowed herself to dwell upon.

Sheldon Cooper, in love with her.

It was her fondest wish, her secret desire. It had bloomed in her before she even knew what it meant. Yet to have it within her grasp, left Amy feeling more vulnerable than ever.

Amy didn't have time to dwell on that, since the door opened swiftly and Leonard came waltzing in, followed by Howard, Raj, and Sheldon. Her eyes bulged out of their sockets when their gazes met, neither one prepared nor expecting to see the other tonight. Sheldon looked just as gob smacked, unable to say even a hello to the other women in the room. Penny and Bernadette simply sat there, smiling at a bewildered Sheldon.

"Hey there, moon pie," Penny teased him, and he glared at her.

"Well, what a surprise. Penny is tipsy. Is it wine o' clock already?" He asked, looking at his watch. Penny simply smirked at him, too giddy with Amy's recent news to let Sheldon ruin it.

She turned her attention to her fiance instead.

"Hey, Sweetie. How was the laser show?" Penny asked him, and Leonard bounced up and down on the spot unable to hide his excitement.

"It worked! Now I get to present the findings to the committee next week."

"Oh, sweetie. I'm so proud of you," Penny gushed, opening her arms for Leonard to step into. The action was like a domino effect; Howard went to Bernie, as well. Sheldon and Amy stayed glued to their spots, unsure of how to react.

Truthfully, Sheldon was dying to kiss Amy in greeting. He just wasn't prepared to take the others' cackling. And then there was the very real fact that he feared once he kissed Amy, he would be helpless to stop. Especially after their…tryst…earlier.

"Oh dear," Sheldon sighed quietly, beginning to panic. Amy noticed his plight, and motioned for him to follow her into the kitchen. It didn't allow for much privacy, but at least they were out of immediate earshot.

Sheldon followed his girlfriend, aware of every nuance about her. His gaze slipped unbidden down to her backside again, and he groaned. Was he going to start behaving like a lecherous barbarian now?

"Hello," She said casually, licking her lips as she tried to be act nonchalant.

"Hello," He answered, his eyes sliding down to said lips. Amy's tongue came out to wet her bottom lip, and Sheldon was done.

Damn the consequences.

Shielding Amy from the others, Sheldon gathered her to him, kissing her mouth off center near her lips. Taken off guard, Amy blindly turned her head to the side and met Sheldon full on. He groaned as their lips connected, tasting the tart grape of her wine she'd consumed earlier.

The pair turned around, both of them embarrassed to find five pairs of shocked eyes watching them. Instinctively, Sheldon took Amy's arm and pushed her behind him. Amy found the cavalier gesture beautiful. She smiled shyly, ducking her head.

"What are you all looking at?" Sheldon asked in a huff, his eyes piercing the groups. "Am I not allowed to greet my girlfriend in the same manner as you all do? Honestly, you act like you've never seen two grownups kiss before."

It was Howard who broke the stunned silence, nervously laughing.

"Yeah, Sheldon we have. It's just…kissing is one thing. Devouring…well, no matter." He said, chuckling again to diffuse the tension.

Sheldon turned back to Amy, loving how she blushed becomingly.

"I'm sorry, Amy. That is why I don't like to tell them anything about our relationship. They act so juvenile."

Amy nodded, having to agree with him. And she was glad she didn't tell the girls everything that happened earlier. That, she decided, was for them. And them alone.

"Look, we're sorry. It's just we are a bit surprised to see you both engaging in PDA's now. You can't blame us, you know. But we promise, we won't tease you about it. Right everyone?" Leonard asked the gang, ever the voice of reason. Everyone agreed. It was Penny who reluctantly nodded.

"Penny," Leonard warned, casting her a stern look.

"Oh, alright. But come on! After all of these years of Sheldon teasing me, aren't I allowed to give him a dose of his own medicine?"

Leonard shook his head. "No, Penny. Leave them alone."

Amy watched the scene with relief. The last thing she wanted to do was field questions about her and Sheldon.

"I'd better get going. I have some work from home I have to do," Amy said, hastily grabbing her coat and purse. "Bye, everyone. Walk me to my car, Sheldon?" She asked hopefully, and Sheldon could not agree fast enough. The pair escaped, leaving five very shocked people in their wake.

"What did we just witness?" Raj asked in confusion, the rest of them smiling at him slyly.

"History, Raj. History," Leonard said.

A/N- This was a long chapter. I hope you don't mind. Some very important points were touched upon here. I hope you enjoy the softening of Sheldon's defenses, and bolder Amy. It's time that woman takes what belongs to her. As always, thank you for reading. x


	17. Chapter 17

~Chapter 17~

A/N- Thanks to everyone for their continued love and support. You are all so wonderful. And to the reviewers who have responding disabled, please know I appreciate every single one. It seems a large number of reader's love the fact Sheldon and Amy are growing closer. Hmmm…interesting.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"You can't know, oh no you can't know how much I think about you, no…It's making my head spin. Looking at you, and you are looking at me, and we both know what we want…Hmmm, so close to giving in…" Jem – Flying High

'_Everything was fine. Everything was fine. Being alone tonight with Amy was no big deal. Fine. Normal. No big deal. We've been alone before, after all…'_

Sheldon repeated this mantra in his head over and over, trying to calm himself down. Trying to dismiss the fact his girlfriend would be there shortly, that they would have the whole apartment to themselves, and that he was a freaking nervous wreck.

It was their first _real_ date night since that Thursday before…

Sheldon pushed those thoughts aside as quickly as they arrived. While that night in Santa Monica was enjoyable, the aftermath of it was something he couldn't face yet.

If ever again.

He wanted to focus on the here and now, and having a pleasant evening with his girlfriend. He had waited almost a month for this. He wasn't going to blow it.

He told himself it was ridiculous, being nervous. This was his girlfriend, not a stranger. They always had a wonderful time together. Heck, they could sit in silence for six hours and still have an enjoyable time together. But the persistent thoughts kept coming, elevating his pulse and making him dizzy.

The fact of the matter was, while they _had_ been alone together before, many times…it was never after they made out like teenagers not once, but twice in as many days. The thought Sheldon Cooper even made out at all was enough to send him into a mental meltdown.

Sheldon paced he floor anxiously.

_Good Lord…what am I doing?_

After Leonard left him at the doorway earlier, Sheldon raced into his apartment like a madman on a mission. Food had to be prepped, a syllabus for class laid out, and he had to take a shower. He cooked the way he did everything else in his life; orderly and controlled. He had this routine down to a science, pun intended, and left the feast he had been anxious to prepare for Amy warming in the oven. Next came preparing for his student's exam tomorrow. He had all of the texts and supplies needed, spread across the now tidied island. All that remained was for him to shower and get dressed.

He stole a glance at the clock. It was only 6:20. He was ten minutes ahead of schedule. He spent those few extra moments in the shower, letting the hot water run over him in soothing rivulets. Sheldon closed his eyes, fighting back any residual panic he had. The water felt good as it ran down his tense body, and he indulged himself by resting his forehead against the tile and trying to clear his mind.

Why was he so nervous? This was Amy. And he knew nothing uncomfortable would happen if neither one of them was prepared. As he rinsed his hair of shampoo, the thought occurred to him that he was so nervous for precisely that reason. It _was _Amy. And lately, Amy had taken over his thoughts. His dreams. And everything in between.

The strange thing was…he didn't feel like this was robbing his intelligence, or taking away from it. He actually felt more focused and calm professionally than he had in over a year. He had always assumed being in a relationship would distract him. He found the opposite was happening.

Yet…old habits die hard. He still had lingering doubts about if he could be the man Amy deserved.

About fifteen minutes after Amy left his classroom yesterday, Leonard came sauntering in. For a split second, Sheldon was worried Leonard had seen them going at it like sex crazed teenagers on his desk. But when his friend waved down to him, letting him know that he was sorry he was late due to some last minute laser calculations, Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief. If he was curious as to why Sheldon was oblivious to his arrival, he never mentioned it.

He never expected to see Amy a mere two hours later at Penny's.

When he walked in and met her eyes, it was like a sledgehammer knocked him in the gut. Kissing her may have been a hasty idea, yet the feel of her again was most welcome. When they escaped Penny's apartment and their well-meaning but nosey friends, Amy let him off the hook about walking her to her car. She must have sensed he was balanced on the edge of his fragile sanity, so she quickly kissed him upon his cheek, hurrying down the stairs with the promise to see him tonight. He stared after her, dumbstruck at the range of emotions he was experiencing.

Arousal. Confusion. Relief. Pride. Sorrow. Anticipation.

On and on, the miasma of feelings swirled inside his head, his heart, and his belly and he found himself back in his apartment sitting in his spot numbly without any recollection of how he got there.

He was quite possibly being turned upside down and inside out.

Sheldon came back to the present, turning off the shower and briskly drying himself off.

He dressed slowly, meticulously…haven chosen his clothing beforehand. He always wore super hero t- shirts. They were as much a part of his personality as his IQ. But looking in his closet now, he felt this strange need to stray from the norm, even if it was for one night.

Amy seemed to like him just as he was, and he appreciated that. But perhaps, she would like to see him in a wider range of clothing? She was always going on about actors like Liam Hemsworth and Channing Tatum, how they dressed so stylishly. Sheldon pursed his lips, considering. How bad could it be, to try something new? He wasn't leaving the apartment, so he wouldn't have to worry about not feeling comfortable. Besides…would this please Amy, seeing him in such attire? The idea she could be excited…

Lord…he couldn't even _think_ it…

Decision made, he closed his closet door and opened his dresser drawers instead.

'_I'll embrace the chaos,_' He thought resolutely. _'Just throw caution to the wind, Cooper.'_

He chose a white t shirt with a V neck baby blue sweater over it, and a pair of faded denim jeans Penny insisted he buy when she took him shopping all those years ago. He had gained a few pounds since then, but they still fit him nicely. Glancing at himself in the mirror, he was surprised that he liked what he saw. It was definitely him; a more mature, refined version, but still Dr. Sheldon Cooper, PhD.

He chuckled to himself, shaking his head.

"I'm going insane," He said aloud to the empty room, his voice sounding incredulous. "In what Universe does Sheldon Cooper stand in front of a mirror…_primping_?"

He made his way out to the living room, lighting the twin candles on the coffee table. The room glowed nicely, and Sheldon stood back to admire his handy work.

He wanted to impress Amy, obviously. Sheldon knew how to cook a mean streak, but it was one of the things about himself he preferred to remain hidden. He never knew why, exactly, but the ability to cook seemed like a trait someone like him shouldn't have. Texan men don't brag about cooking. They don't brag about Science, either, he figured out at a young age. Was it any wonder that now, at age 34, Sheldon felt like a virgin in more ways than one?

For dinner, he decided upon his Mother's fried chicken with mashed potatoes and gravy, and fresh green beans with bacon. For dessert, they would have her pecan pie. He knew the meal was more calorie laden than any his girlfriend usually partook, but he _was _from Texas. Growing up, the consensus was go big or go home. And Texas was as big as you got. By the time Amy arrived, the apartment smelled incredible and Sheldon was finally beginning to relax.

Amy knocked softly, and Sheldon slowly walked over to let her in. His eyes did a quick scan of the room. Everything was going to be fine, He thought again, before flinging open the door.

Amy smiled as Sheldon lost his balance, before righting himself again quickly. He flushed in embarrassment at the look of mirth on Amy's face.

"I think this door needs some WD-40," He said shyly, to which Amy giggled.

"Hmm…So it would seem." She said in agreement, lowering her face hide her grin.

Sheldon motioned to Amy's coat. "Would you like me to help you?" He asked, and Amy nodded, pleased at the offer.

"Yes. Thank you Sheldon. Wow…it smells amazing in here." She gushed, inhaling deeply.

He smiled widely at her, taking note of her beautiful dress. It was pink, sheer, and had a light matching cardigan. Sheldon blushed as her eyes met his. Neither one knew how to approach their newfound intimacy, so Amy decided to take her cues from Sheldon. He looked nervous enough, so she felt it best to not push the issue.

"You look…different," She said in awe, eyeing him up and down.

'_He's wearing jeans, she thought in amazement. Sheldon Cooper never wears jeans. And his sweater…it_ _looks so soft_.' The light color brought out the deep blue of his eyes.

Sheldon continued to blush at Amy's perusal of him.

"I wanted to look nice…for you," He admitted softly, lowering his gaze and looking away. Amy found his shyness incredibly appealing. Didn't he realize that the more he acted so sweet, the deeper she was falling?

"Well…you certainly do, Dr. Cooper."

Sheldon grinned, biting his lip to hide his delight at her compliment. He narrowed his eyes to her playfully.

"Thank you. But don't you go getting any funny ideas, Dr. Fowler; I refuse to be Ken to your Barbie. If you try to drag me into anything with the words Abercrombie or Fitch, then we're done."

Amy snorted. She rather liked this side of Sheldon.

"I promise, Sheldon. No Abercrombie and Fitch. And I don't mind your normal attire. But thank you for the effort. You look…very handsome." She whispered.

Sheldon softened at the gentle look on her face.

"You look…very pretty tonight, Amy. I very much like you in pink."

Amy smiled widely.

"Thank you, Sheldon."

They stood there a few moments, staring at each other and not knowing what to say.

"Well, dinner is ready. Would you like some wine?" He asked, surprising her. She smiled and nodded her head.

"Yes, thank you. I would love a glass. But I know you hate alcohol. Especially wine."

He guided her over to the couch before heading to the refrigerator and unearthing a bottle of chardonnay.

"But I know you enjoy wine. A glass won't kill me. We're having poultry. I thought white was best," He said happily, pleased with himself when Amy grinned.

"Someone's been doing their homework," She mused, admiring the way Sheldon used the corkscrew to remove the cork as though he'd done this a hundred times. She watched the way his forearm muscles bulged as he used the instrument. Biting her lip, Amy looked away before Sheldon saw the blush that no doubt bloomed on her cheeks.

He handed her a glass of the crisp, cold white, clinking his own glass with hers.

"Cheers," He said cheekily, taking a sip. Amy followed suit, her eyes meeting his over the rim.

"I've always wanted to say that," He admitted shyly, and Amy laughed.

"Does it burn?" She asked him in humor as he swallowed, and Sheldon grinned.

"Not as much as it did before. I suppose it was the tannins in the red," He mused. "Not my favorite beverage, though. It doesn't hold a candle to yoo-hoo."

The innocence of his voice made Amy smile widely. Her eyes followed him as he returned to the kitchen, pulling out casserole pans from the oven.

"May I offer you some assistance, Sheldon?" She asked eagerly, but her boyfriend turned and fixed her with a stern glare.

"No you may not, little lady. Everything is ready. I simply have to serve it up," He answered.

Amy smiled as she demurely sipped her wine, watching him as he went about his task. She enjoyed how focused he was with everything he did. When Sheldon Cooper went in, he went _all_ in. Nothing was done halfway in his world, whether it was working on equations, solving the mysteries of the Universe, or simply cooking.

A tingle went through her as her mind followed a dangerous path of wondering how focused he would be on her if he ever gave in to the desire she was certain he felt. Shaking herself out of her wayward thoughts, her stomach rumbled in delight as he laid a plate down in front of her that smelled tantalizingly delicious.

"Sheldon, this looks incredible. Did you make all of this?" She asked, closing her eyes as the heavenly aroma wafted up to her nostrils. Sheldon was pleased at her favorable reaction, and a large grin broke out over his features.

"Yes, I did. I hope you enjoy it. Please start," He encouraged, sitting down beside her and digging in himself.

Amy smiled at Sheldon's thoughtfulness, and at the obvious work he put into this meal.

Dinner was delicious. Sheldon kept his obvious cooking skills a secret, but now that she knew how good he was, she would demand he cook for her more often. They laughed and joked about the looks on everyone's faces yesterday as they fled Penny's place. What they must have thought!

Sheldon looked over at Amy as she filled a forkful with potatoes, about ready to eat it.

"What's wrong, Sheldon? Do I have food on my face?" She asked him, eyes widening. He smiled at her gently.

"No, no…I was just wondering. Are you feeling alright? No problems breathing, or any headaches?" He asked with concern. Amy was touched that he was still so worried about her well- being.

"I'm fine, Sheldon. I'm still a little congested and have to use the inhaler the Dr. prescribed. But everything is alright."

Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief.

"That's good to hear." He said softly. "Are you finished?"

Amy nodded as Sheldon gathered their plates, and he rose to walk to the kitchen.

"Don't forget, I made pecan pie for dessert," He said proudly, as Amy followed him. She had eaten every morsel on her own plate and was embarrassed to admit she could still eat more.

"You baked a pie? For me?" She asked in excitement, and Sheldon was thrilled at the sparkle in her eye.

"Yes. My mother's pecan pie. It is my absolute favorite. I only make it on special occasions," He whispered. Amy ran her hand down his arm warmly, touched he would consider cooking dinner for her a special occasion.

"That sounds wonderful, Sheldon. Thank you. I'm going to go wash up. May we have the pie shortly?"

"Of course," He reassured, rinsing the dishes and putting them in dishwasher along with the rest of the cookware.

Sheldon watched her go, letting out a gust of breath. Dinner _was_ amazing, he reflected, and not just the food.

There was a strange tension in the air, one that Sheldon had never noticed before. Everything Amy did- from sipping her wine, to cutting her meat, to chewing and swallowing…left Sheldon with a feeling of fascination and something he couldn't name. It felt like a school of butterflies had been let loose inside his stomach. He chided himself for acting like a hippy. He had seen Amy eat hundreds of times. He couldn't understand why this occasion was any different. But that little voice inside his head grabbed him by the shoulders, whispering in his ear.

_It's different because __you're__ different. It's different because you made her dinner for a reason, Cooper. To impress her. To show her how special she is. To be alone with her. It's different because after yesterday in your classroom, it can never go back to the way it was. You know it, and she knows it._

Sheldon really hated that inner voice. It forced him to face things he was terrified to.

Amy returned from the bathroom, seating herself on the sofa.

"May I at least help you clean up?" She asked, and Sheldon turned to her once again with a playful smirk.

"No, Amy. I'm almost finished. You're my guest, so it's up to me to cook and clean."

She shook her head, letting the matter drop.

"Sheldon that was absolutely scrumptious. Where did you learn how to cook like that? And more importantly, how did I never know about it? You've been holding out on me all of these years, Mister."

Sheldon washed his hands at the sink, before pouring them each a glass of water and bringing them to the coffee table. He set them both down with care, and settled into his spot next to Amy.

"I am so glad you enjoyed it. I had many teachers. My mother, of course. My meemaw…even my father knew his way around a kitchen. He was the 'Pitmaster' in our house, what people in the North would call a master of the BBQ. My mother used to go on for days after he prepared ribs. I don't know if you are aware, but Texas is the capitol of BBQ. Maybe I don't indulge in it that much now because as a child, it was literally forced down my throat," He chuckled, taking a long swig of his water.

Amy cocked her head, watching Sheldon reminisce about childhood. She picked up on something, though, that she normally never dwelled upon.

"Do you miss him…your father I mean," She asked tentatively, not wanting to upset him. Sheldon rarely talked about his father, and when he did, it wasn't always positively. Amy knew George Cooper Sr. Had done some terrible things in his time, and he wasn't exactly Sheldon's hero. She knew he was an alcoholic and Sheldon had hinted to the fact he'd committed adultery on more than one occasion. She couldn't reconcile a man like that fathering Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

Sheldon shrugged, a darkness crossing his features.

"He was my father. I suppose I miss him. I think what I miss more are the lost opportunities we might have shared. But then again, he wasn't the easiest man to please. A Texan through and through, my father had a very specific idea of what a man was. We had nothing in common. And he never let me forget that," He said uneasily.

It was Amy's turn to frown now. Reaching out, she placed a gentle hand atop his.

"Hey…You are brilliant. And your father would be extremely proud of you. I think in many ways, your father was jealous of you."

Sheldon blanched at this, turning to meet Amy's gaze head on.

"Jealous? No…I don't think that is right. I was a child, Amy. A tall, thin, know it all genius who never played sports with my father, rode ATV's with him, shot guns with him- I was a disappointment to him in many ways. I never understood why it was so important to him, me being like him. He had George Jr. For that. And they were two peas in a pod, those two. If it weren't for the fact Missy is my twin, I would have sworn that I was adopted."

Amy opened her mouth to say something, yet his words and hurt tone of voice stopped her in her tracks. She ached for the young boy he had been, always feeling out of place and alone. An interloper in his own home. An outlander. His brilliant and beautiful mind having no outlet to express itself. She knew exactly how he felt.

Although her parents were intelligent people, academically they weren't of her caliber. She was a lonely child, who spent hours fiddling with Science kits and reading books too advanced for her age. She knew early on she was good with numbers and words. When the other kids teased her in fifth grade for reading at a high school comprehension level, she took it in stride. When the blond bimbos of high school tormented her because she was the class Valedictorian, she took it in stride. When her college peers were too busy getting laid and getting drunk while she was already studying for graduate school, she took it in stride.

Amy Farrah Fowler knew she was different. She knew in many ways, she was better. And she never entertained that in this life she would meet her male counterpart equal. Yet fate and a dirty sock intervened on her behalf.

Four years and a lifetime later, she had to say she believed in fate. The epitome of her heart's desire was sitting next to her, looking through her soul and making her feel like anything was possible.

Amy wrapped both of his hands within hers, squeezing gently. Sheldon watched their intertwined fingers intently. Sheldon needed to hear something only Amy could tell him. She knew he valued her opinion, and she knew he trusted her.

"Sheldon…you are a special man with incredible gifts. Anyone can see you are extraordinary. I know you felt alone growing up, but the fault did not lie with you. I think…perhaps your father knew that as a man, he could never accomplish what you would one day. I think he was afraid to watch you blossom into something he could never compete with. You weren't a disappointment to him, Sheldon. Quite the opposite. He was a disappointment to himself."

Sheldon stared at Amy in shock. It wasn't as though he was upset with her for disrespecting his father's memory, he just couldn't understand how what she was insinuating could be true.

"Amy…that is insane. My father married, had three children, he owned his own business. He was a pillar of our community, a trusted member of our church…everyone looked up to him and admired him. As much as a pig headed drunk as he was, people respected him. I can't even drive a car without having a meltdown. I live with a roommate. I have a strict set of rules that govern my life, and up until a few months ago…I couldn't even admit to the woman I love that I did so," He said in shame, shaking his head at his shortcomings. Amy gripped his hands tighter, forcing him to look at her.

"Those things don't measure you as a man, Sheldon. Standing up for your principles, being strong of mind and heart. Being intelligent and caring to those in your life. That's what makes you a man. You are the finest man I have ever known. You were there for me, every step of my illness. You helped make me whole again. I know the guys razz you all the time, but any one of them would lay down their lives for you. They love you, Sheldon. _I_ love you. You are not alone anymore. You have people in your life that appreciate you and accept you as you are. Quirks and all," She threw in, harkening back to the conversation they had when Sheldon first admitted he liked her. The sincerity in her eyes made Sheldon want to cry.

"Amy…thank you for saying that. And for coming over tonight. I…"

He was overwhelmed with emotions he had no idea how to process. Amy saw the tears gathering in his eyes, and figured that was enough heaviness for one night.

"Hey…never thank me for telling you the truth. And there is no other place I'd rather be, Sheldon. So on that note…what should we do for the rest of our night?"

She was giving him an out, he realized, from expressing his embarrassing emotions. He smiled at her gratefully and squeezed her hands tighter.

"We could watch a movie?" He suggested, and Amy nodded happily.

"Alright. What do you propose? We can watch a DVD, or find something on Netflix if you like, or-"

Amy rose, going to her purse and unearthing a small disk. Sheldon watched her curiously.

"I stopped at a Redbox and picked up a movie, just in case."

Sheldon read the disk, his eyes sparkling with delight.

"The Fifth Element? You want to watch a Sci-Fi movie?" He asked incredulously, and Amy smiled slyly.

"I know you like the genre. And I really enjoy Gary Oldman. So I consider this a compromise.

"Oh, Amy! This is one of my all- time favorite movies," Sheldon gushed, jumping up to put the disk in. Amy grinned to herself that she made Sheldon so happy.

"I know. You told me that night we went to the Science Center."

Sheldon stopped in his tracks, turning to his girlfriend in awe.

"You remembered that?" He asked her, and Amy nodded.

"Of course, Sheldon. I may not have your eidetic memory, but I make it a point to remember everything you tell me. I have my own little library of 'Sheldon Cooper facts' up here-"She tapped her temple delicately, and he beamed at her.

"Shall we prepare for your class tomorrow before we watch the film?" Amy suggested, and Sheldon nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes, that would be prudent. I have everything set up. We only need to attach the test questions to the answer sheet, insert them into their sealed bags, and stamp them."

The next hour was spent doing just that, with witty banter and lighthearted joking thrown in. Sheldon and Amy sat side by side at the island, working like a well-oiled machine. Midway through, he dished up some pie and whipped cream for them both, relishing Amy's face when she took her first bite.

"Oh, Sheldon. This pie is delightful. I think I've gained ten pounds tonight," She sighed fretfully, but Sheldon only smiled. He wanted to tell her he loved her figure, and how her curves enchanted him. Embarrassed for his wayward thoughts, Sheldon returned his attention to their task.

Finally, all 200 tests were ready to be distributed. Sheldon stacked them up neatly in a box, setting them by the door so he wouldn't forget them in the morning.

"Well, that was fun. You and I work very well together, don't you agree Dr. Fowler?"

Amy grinned as she spun around, hopping off the stool to come stand next to Sheldon.

"Yes I believe we do, Dr. Cooper."

"How did you like that pie?" He asked her, his eyes narrowing in sly confidence. He knew very well that pie was delicious.

Amy rolled her eyes in a gesture of astonishment.

"That pie was fantastic. If you are trying to fatten me up, you're doing a fine job. I'd better be careful from now on. I keep forgetting how Texans like to eat. And stop fishing for compliments," She chided.

Sheldon grinned at his girlfriend, motioning for her to resume her seat on the couch.

"Shall we watch the film now, or are you too tired?" He asked in concern, noting the hour was approaching half past nine. Perhaps she would be too tired now.

Amy looked at her watch, shaking her head.

"No, it's alright. Are you too tired now? I know you would like to get a good night's rest for tomorrow, so if you want me to leave-"

Sheldon shook his head wildly.

_Leave? Heavens, no._

"No! Don't leave. It's fine. Please…make yourself comfortable," He implored, and Amy did just that.

Sheldon dimmed the lights, something he never did before while watching a film. That alone made her heart accelerate. Coming back to his spot, he hit play on the DVD and settled in. Amy met his gaze, staring at his eyes and then his lips, running the circuit and back again.

The tension in the room was so thick, you could slice it with a razor.

'_Hold her hand, you idiot'_, Sheldon's inner voice demanded. That little man was getting on his nerves tonight.

Sheldon slid his hand down his leg, turning it palm up and waited for Amy to put her hand inside his. When she did, he closed his eyes as a surge of contentment swept through him. Turning to meet her gaze, he was pleased to see she was as affected by their closeness as he was.

They usually held hands while out on date night, mostly when watching a movie. This was no different. Yet all of a sudden, having her so close and all to himself, he wanted…more.

"Amy?"

"Hmm?" She answered quietly, already trying to follow the plot of the movie.

"May we cuddle?" He asked, his voice raspy and low. Amy thought her heart was going to cease beating. She turned fully to face him, trapped in his gaze.

"Y-you want to cuddle?" She asked, genuinely surprised. Sheldon nodded.

"Really?" She reiterated, and Sheldon answered quietly.

"Yes."

_Oh, my…_ She thought, her mind racing. _So much for following the plot._

"Alright," She said, her eyes darting around trying to find the best way to snuggle up against him.

"Come here," He whispered, wrapping his arm around her back and pulling her to him. Amy complied, scooting her legs upon the sofa beneath her and resting her head on his chest. The position reminded Sheldon of when they cuddled, so long ago. Then, he was indignant at having to do that. But now…

They spent the next hour and a half in silence, each barely focusing on the movie. Sheldon trailed his fingertips up and down Amy's back, coming dangerously close to second base as they skirted her side. Her eyes shut of their own accord, savoring his touch even as her breathing became choppy. Did he have any idea what he was doing to her, she wondered? Having her head rest upon his chest, she was so close to his neck. He smelled delicious; his normal talc scent mixed with his natural pheromones driving her crazy. She had her palm on Sheldon's chest, but couldn't resist caressing him up and down. The feel of his hard muscles beneath his sweater was heavenly.

Sheldon gritted his teeth and tried to remain calm, but he was getting more than aroused. His stomach quivered as she ran her hand along his torso, the muscles contracting pleasurably. The feeling was amazing. He'd never in his life experienced such…anticipation. He could hardly breathe from the way her touch was making him feel.

Finally, he could take no more. He paused the movie, sending a glaring silence through the apartment. They each sat there, still in the same positions as a minute before. Two minutes. Only their erratic breathing could be heard.

Amy looked up him at the same time he looked down at her. The look in his eyes made her tremble.

"Its date night," He managed, his voice strained. Amy knew where he was going with this. Thank God.

"It is." She answered in agreement, her eyes straying to his lips. He caught the move as quickly as he caught his breath.

"Amy…" He whispered, trying to convey to her what he wanted. What he _needed_, in that moment.

"Any old time, Sheldon…" Amy whispered back, and that was all the encouragement he needed. He closed the distance between them, dragging Amy onto his lap. The surprised whimper of delight she let out was music to Sheldon's ears. Placing both hands on the sides of her face, he covered her mouth with his.

His lips were warm and gentle, kissing her with tenderness. He delved into her sweet mouth, his tongue begging for entrance. Amy surrendered with a groan. She tasted like pecan pie, he thought in a daze…sweet and rich. It was becoming so damned easy to kiss her, and not be afraid. Sheldon wondered how he went so long without this. He must have been crazy.

"Oh, god…" he moaned, his mind clouding with passion and lust. He slid down the couch a fraction, Amy landing against him forcefully.

"Uh…" He choked out, as Amy tried to gain purchase. In doing so, her lower body landed on his lap even further down. Her body felt like it would catch fire when she felt the evidence of Sheldon's desire. To her utter shock and delight, he didn't move. Didn't fight her. Didn't push her off. He seemed paralyzed, his eyes closed and his wet lips hungrily devouring hers.

The time to be tentative was over, she thought, taking the reins and kissing him back ferociously. Sheldon's head thumped back against the arm rest as Amy devoured his lips.

"We…we…we have to s-stop," He murmured, yet he didn't cease his ministrations on Amy's lips. Amy moaned as Sheldon nibbled his way down to her pulse point. Her palms which were resting on his chest, slid down and landed on his hips. When her fingers gripped his belt in distraction, Sheldon almost passed out.

"Whoa," He gasped, jumping off the couch like it was on fire. Amy wasn't offended or hurt by his outburst. The look on his face told her all she needed to know.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. Are you alright?" She enquired, worried she went too far. Sheldon paced around the room slowly, daring not to look at her.

"I'm… I'm alright. Just a bit…overwhelmed." He answered, running his hand through his hair. He looked like a panther on the prowl. With his hair mussed and his sweater askew, he looked sexy and adorable. Amy's heart tugged in her chest.

"Sheldon…I'm so sorry. I wasn't…I wasn't going to touch you…you know. There. My hands just slipped. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." She said sincerely. He stopped pacing and looked at her with hooded eyes. Amy swallowed thickly. He didn't look mad. He didn't even look upset. He looked…Lord, he looked good enough to eat.

Amy tried to calm herself down. The last thing she wanted was for Sheldon to think she was going to molest him.

"I know you didn't, Amy. I was just unprepared. I didn't mean to make you feel bad. Good Lord…this is exhausting," He lamented, rubbing his eyes wearily. Amy sighed and approached him cautiously.

"You didn't make me feel bad. Really. I just want you to be comfortable with me. With us."

Sheldon heard the sincerity in Amy's voice, and felt foolish for overreacting.

"I do, Amy. That's the problem," He murmured in embarrassment. Amy smiled gently at him.

Sheldon managed a smile in return, his sparkling blue eyes drinking Amy in. Whatever he had done to deserve her, he would never know. He never thought another human presence would be so vital to his life. It was as exhilarating as it was terrifying.

"It's late. I'd better go and let you get some rest," She said regretfully. Sheldon nodded, disappointed the night had to end.

Amy put on her coat, surprised when Sheldon helped her by lifting her hair out of the way. Instead of letting it go once the coat was on, he laid it gently down her back and smoothed it with his gentle palm. Amy shivered with delight at his intimate gesture.

"Thank you, Sheldon. I had a wonderful time tonight. Good luck tomorrow. I know you will be amazing and the students will do well."

Sheldon swallowed as his eyes burned into hers.

"You're welcome, Amy. And thank you for helping me with the tests. And…for what you said earlier. It meant…a lot to me." He whispered.

Amy was too touched to answer. She nodded her head and picked up her purse, walking to the door. Sheldon followed behind her, tentatively placing his hand on her shoulder.

"Amy…you said earlier that I was the finest man you had ever known. Did you really mean that?"

Amy didn't know why that particular statement weighed in Sheldon's thoughts. But she knew that her answer was vital.

"The finest, Sheldon. Yes. I meant it. Every word," She said resolutely. Sheldon's eyes widened.

"Really?" He whispered, stepping closer to her.

"Really."

Her certainty stumped Sheldon.

"But…I'm…me." He finished in frustration, confused when Amy simply smiled at him.

"Exactly," She said playfully, reaching up on her tiptoes to plant a sweet, tender kiss on Sheldon's lips. It was over before he even had a chance to respond. He stared at her in shock as she turned the knob and disappeared through the door.

A while later, when he lay in bed trying to relax enough to sleep, his thoughts drifted to Amy. For the first time since they met four years ago, Sheldon found himself imagining she were there in bed beside him.

He allowed his thoughts to drift, imagining her snuggled into his side and the feel of her soft curves fitting perfectly against his own. He imagined the sweet smelling fragrance of her shampoo in his nostrils, the silkiness of her skin against his own, and her soft breathing humming steadily in his ear. He imagined her feminine smile upon awakening, fixed upon him. Only him. The finest man she had ever known.

Sheldon fell into a deep sleep. He dreamt of pecan pie. And the way it tasted on Amy's lips.

A/N- These two, huh? Three chapters in one weekend. I hope you've enjoyed. Next update: Wednesday-ish. x


	18. Chapter 18

~Chapter 18~

A/N- Thank you to everyone for the kindness you've shown me, and for your continued support. I am so happy this story pleases you. I feel I should warn you, this story will continue to have some form of angst in its entirety. That being said, I will never leave them languishing or suffering for very long. It is just the evolutionary process that Sheldon and Amy must undergo in order to conquer the chaos.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I'm holding on your rope, got me ten feet off the ground. I'm hearing what you say, but I just can't make a sound. You tell me that you need me, then you go and cut me down…" One Republic - Apologize

Amy watched the whirl of the centrifuge, lost in thought. So many good things had happened to her in the space of a week, and she was just beginning to process them all. Her mind should be focused on work today, but how could it be?

She and Sheldon were finally reaching a point in their relationship that promised further intimacy, both emotional and physical. It was what she wanted all along. Yet these new feelings were intense and scary.

She drove home last night in a happy daze, unable to keep the grin off her face. At least three cars beeped at her to go once the light turned green, but she had been too wrapped up in the night's events. By the time she reached her door, she was a quivering mass of feelings.

That wasn't _all_ that was quivering, she discovered, to her great embarrassment.

More than once during the night, she awoke in the throes of an erotic dream about Sheldon. The images were so real, she had to get out of bed to get a glass of water and cool off.

The intimate tryst on his couch had left her a mess. Never in her life had she experienced such sexual arousal. While true, her relationship with Sheldon was mentally fulfilling, she never allowed herself to dwell on his physical appeal. She knew it was a futile endeavor. Or at least…it had been.

She was certain that concerning a sex life with Sheldon, once the floodgates were opened, the deluge would be massive. It's not something she could have freely discussed with him. That conversation even a month ago would have been met with deaf ears. She wondered if Sheldon was aware of the tempest building between them. Surely, he had to know something was changing. His casual looks and touches seemed deeper, more intimate somehow. Even the way he smiled at her was different.

Normally, she was resigned that in Sheldon's universe, Science was its center. The very notion that she herself could be the center was absurd. Yet recent events were showing her that she occupied more of Sheldon's thoughts then she previously assumed.

She reminded herself that for the better part of four years, Sheldon kept himself at arms- length from her in many ways. Perhaps his leaving this past summer was exactly what they both needed. He had changed, somehow.

More than that, her illness seemed to catapult him from his denial. She never imagined such…passion…was dormant inside of her boyfriend. She shivered remembering the way he took charge last night, kissing her like his life depended on it. And the feel of him beneath her on his couch. Oh, God…the _feel _of him. His tall body, his muscular thighs…and something else, she could hardly admit to without blushing profusely.

'_He's a man first…_'

'Indeed, Vivian,' She thought in wonder. She smiled fondly as she pictured his handsome face.

In particulars, Sheldon was always going to be Sheldon. Haughty, condescending, and straightforwardly direct.

And yet…his very essence seemed to have undergone a metamorphosis. The fact that last night he wanted to cuddle with her was a huge step forward. Amy closed her eyes as she remembered feeling Sheldon's warmth against her in the dimly lit room.

She reluctantly turned her attention back to the task at hand. And the other pressing issue on her mind as of late. Her work.

Since returning yesterday to her lab, she realized with renewed vigor how much her work meant to her. Being away for almost a month showed her just how much she valued her mind. It was nice to have confirmation that others valued it as well. Being told she may be up to win a Nobel was something she would never have dared to hope for. Even if it fell through, the idea she may be considered was enough.

While thrilled she was chosen to do this experiment, it was going to be a daunting task. At least three months were riding on this, and she had to stay focused. That wasn't going to be easy with Dr. Mcdreamy on her mind all of the time. Amy rolled her eyes at her dilemma.

She had joked about it more than once, but she really did wish she could go back and tell teenaged Amy that yes, things _did_ get better.

The grin slid off of Amy's face as a sudden chill enveloped her, and she experienced a strange feeling of déjà vu. She put down the pen she was holding and stared into space.

That was strange.

Amy heard her cell phone message alert ring, startling her. Plucking it from her bag, she grinned.

Speak of the devil, and he appears.

'_Testing has been going well. Students very eager. I was going to throw a curve ball in there about Quantum Entanglement and Nonlocality, but decided not to. Why upset the apple cart? They are really seeming to enjoy my class, Amy! I really hope they do well on this exam. Good students are reflections of a good teacher, after all. Oh! I wanted to thank you again for last night.'_

Amy's heart fluttered as she read Sheldon's words.

'_Good to hear. I knew you had it in you to be an excellent teacher, Sheldon. Good call on the last minute subtraction. By the way…for what are you thanking me? Helping you with the exams, or for the make out session on your couch? Because if it was that, well…no thanks required. *wink*'_

Amy hit send before she could talk herself out of it. She bit her lip, worried that he would be upset with her teasing. She waited for five minutes before she put the phone down, scared that Sheldon either didn't like her choice of words, or they flew right over his head. When her phone pinged, she held it out away from her, like it was a bomb about to go off.

Her eyes bugged out and Amy gasped.

'_Helping me with the exams of course, Dr. Fowler. Believe me, if I were thanking you about…the other thing…you'd know it. Undoubtedly.'_

Amy looked around her lab, a needless gesture since she was very much alone. Still, Sheldon's overt innuendo made her blush madly. Cradling the phone, she tapped out a reply before she lost her nerve.

'_Really, now... And just how would I know it, Dr. Cooper?'_

Amy drummed her fingers on her desk, nervous and intrigued.

Sheldon's text came back immediately.

'_Well…for one thing, you wouldn't be getting a thank you in a text. I am much more gracious than that, Dr. Fowler. I could think of other ways to…show my appreciation. Many, many ways.'_

Amy gasped, tugging at her collar. Was he…was he attempting to _sext_ her? What in the devil had come over him? Amy chuckled as she decided she didn't care. Whatever it was, she liked it. A lot. Deciding it was time to fight fire with fire, Amy turned the tables on him.

'_Is that so, Dr. Cooper? Well…I would be most…open to that, I assure you. But, the fact also remains…I never thanked you properly for that amazing meal you prepared. You know, I could also accommodate you to show my gratitude. Have you anything in mind? Anything I could offer you to slake your thirst?'_

Amy hit send, laughing out loud. This was where Sheldon ran away with his tail between his legs, feigning ignorance. Or chastising her, at the very least. She was going to let him off the hook, of course. When his text rang through, Amy began to read it with a smug grin on her face. The grin slid off very quickly, replaced with a look of disbelief.

'_I have many things in mind, Amy. None of which I could relate to you here, now, in this classroom. I would make a spectacle of myself, and I know you appreciate the value I put on decorum. The fact is, the truth is… I can't stop thinking about the way you touched me. The way you kissed me. The things you said to me last night. I lay awake thinking of you. Remembering your lovely scent. Remembering the taste of your lips. And then, as I slept, I dreamt of you. You gave me a night full of peace. So in all seriousness…thank you, Amy.'_

Amy's eyes filled with tears, her heart and body battling with each other for purchase. His words aroused her beyond belief, while his confession touched her deeply. Torn between wanting to bawl like a baby and wanting to march across campus to Sheldon's classroom, Amy chose the former. The latter would indeed induce gossip. Salty tears fell down her cheeks, and she wiped them away hastily. The cursor on her phone blinked at her, taunting her to reply. She was at a loss. What began as a pseudo game of phone sex had morphed into something more meaningful, and she didn't want that to be cheapened in any way.

'_I don't know what to say, Sheldon. You are always on my mind. I dreamt of you last night, too. Which made me wake up very happy indeed. So in all seriousness…thank you back.'_

Amy got up and went to the counter to retrieve a tissue. It wouldn't do to have someone walk in to her lab and see her crying. As she dabbed the tissue at her eyes, her phone pinged again.

'_You should never have told me that you dream of me, Dr. Fowler. Fatal move on your part. Woeful, tactical error.'_

Amy grinned. A delicious shiver went up her spine. Gamer Sheldon had been awakened.

'_Oh? Why is that?'_

She stole a glance at the doorway, frowning when Dr. Gunderson passed by. She was relieved when he shot her a friendly smile before continuing down the corridor.

Ping.

'_Because now I will be imagining in what context you dreamt of me for the rest of the day, you Vixen.'_

Vixen?

Amy sat down, needing to before she keeled over. She knew she had to choose her words carefully. One false move could send their playful house of cards tumbling. While his text was sent in humor, she couldn't help but feel he knew exactly what his words invoked. Could Sheldon really envision her having erotic dreams about him? And if so, how did that make him feel? She wasn't going to deny it to him. She was a grown woman. If he wanted another outcome, it was too bad. The truth was…she _had_ been having erotic dreams of him. And that hadn't changed in over four years. With a new determination, she texted him back.

'_Hmm…interesting. You know, I would never dispel any pleasure of yours, Dr. Cooper…nor would I question the capacity for infinite possibilities in an infinite number of Universes. I can assure you that in all of them, the outcome would be the same.'_

It wasn't a lie, after all. She'd dreamt of Sheldon in a sexual capacity before, of course. But never as intense as the last few weeks. And _never_ like last night. A blush crept up on her and she fanned herself. Her phone pinged. She was almost afraid to read it.

Almost.

'_And what exactly would this outcome be, Amy?'_

She smiled devilishly. The gloves, as they say, were off.

'_You have a beautiful mind, Sheldon. Let it run wild.'_

The gauntlet was thrown.

'_Dear lord, Amy. What are you doing to me?'_

She sighed, feeling her excitement grow as she read his words. He asked for it, after all.

'_I'm being honest, Sheldon. To you, and to myself. I won't apologize for that.'_

Would honesty be the catalyst for them, after four years of pussyfooting around each other? While he always knew she wanted more from him, she had formerly let him take the reins, downplaying her desire. Would it now be her time to make her desires known?

'_Honesty is the best policy, Dr. Fowler. Perhaps it's time I was honest as well.'_

Amy sat down in her chair, bracing her arms against the desk. She had no idea how to respond to that.

'_What would you suggest, Dr. Cooper? You are a genius after all, and I bow to your…sensibilities.'_

Amy waited for Sheldon to answer, all the while wondering if whatever he suggested, she'd be ready for it.

'_Meet me in my office today after work. I'll be there after 4. Will that work for you?'_

Amy stared at the text, her heart about to explode.

Meet me in my office…

Heavens.

She took a deep breath, blowing it out shakily.

'_Yes.'_

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

What the devil am I going to do?

Sheldon paced his office, nearly wearing a hole through the carpet. What was he thinking today with those texts? It wasn't like him to behave so impetuously. And Lord…the things he wrote. The things _she_ wrote. He found himself caught up in the moment, and he couldn't stop himself.

He had to admit, he now knew _exactly_ what sexting meant. Well, it was pretty tame by social standards, but still…what was happening to him? He was a Homo Novus.

_Wasn't he_?

He could almost hear Amy's husky voice speaking the words; words that were sticking in his eidetic memory and making him want to run to her lab and…

Running his hand through his hair, he thought back to all that had been revealed, on both fronts. He let down his guard, spilling his guts. But to his utter delight, Amy had reciprocated. And it didn't seem silly. Or weird. Or vulgar in any way. Rather, it was…sexy. Sultry.

Exciting.

'_I would be open to showing you my gratitude'_

'_You're always on my mind'_

'_I dreamt of you last night'_

'_Let your beautiful mind run wild'_

'_That was the problem, Amy…my beautiful mind IS running wild,' He thought darkly. _And he had no idea how to control it.

Sheldon stopped his pacing, placing both hands on his desk to catch his breath. He bent his head, breathing deeply through his nose and out through his mouth. He told Amy to meet him here. What in the world was he going to do once she got here? He hadn't planned that far ahead.

This is madness, he thought wildly.

Sheldon had woken up early that morning, roused by dreams of Amy and him rolling around on his bed getting tangled in his sheets. Her beautiful hair was wrapped around them like a waterfall, securing him and comforting him. When he woke up alone, panting and sweating, he realized the inevitable truth.

He _wanted _her.

And he didn't know how the hell to cope with these longings.

It was her statement last night that did it. Completely and utterly sealing his fate. She considered him to be the finest man she had ever known. He had the suspicion it was because of more than his intellect.

While Sheldon always considered himself superior to everyone, a nagging sensation in his gut and in his heart was ever present, mocking him. Perhaps you aren't the smartest. Perhaps you aren't the greatest. Perhaps…Amy could find someone better. Someone who doesn't have your emotional problems, intimacy problems, closure problems. Someone who could just tell her how he feels. Show her how he feels. Give her what she wants, needs, and deserves.

Sheldon knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, that if that happened, he would never recover. Oh, he'd go on living. He would function. But he would be dead inside, just existing.

While leaving last summer seemed like the only way out from his stress, he knew if the tables were turned, and it was Amy who stormed out of his apartment…Amy who got on a train without even saying goodbye…Amy distancing herself from him for 45 days…he knew he would fall apart.

Sheldon couldn't deny the feelings being near Amy stirred. He had been successful in hiding them for years. But he was quickly finding the battle was lost. Everything he never knew he wanted was in his grasp. He was too afraid to reach out and take it, though.

Why was this so hard? When did…feelings…become more important than science? There was a time before Amy when he felt content in his isolation. He was Sheldon Cooper. He was going to win a Nobel Prize for Physics. He was going to change the world. And now, all he could think of was Amy. What was she doing to him?

Feeling more and more frustrated, he banged both hands down upon his desk forcefully.

"Damn it," He hissed, angry that his emotions had taken over.

"Sheldon?"

Sheldon whirled around, startled that he didn't even hear Amy knock. He gulped, mortified that she heard him curse.

"I knocked, but you didn't answer. I knew you were in here. I'm sorry I just walked in," She said contritely, standing in the doorway with her hands clasped. Sheldon stood still, unable to do anything but stare at her. She was like a beautiful mirage.

"Are you alright, Sheldon?" She asked sweetly, and Sheldon blinked liked an owl.

Oh, snap…She looked adorable. Not the sexy vixen he saw the day before yesterday in his classroom, but she was his Amy through and through. Her hair was straight as usual, with a little silver clip holding it away from her face. Her lab coat was gone, and she was wearing a pretty wine colored corduroy skirt with a matching blazer. His gaze swept over her from head to toe. Before he knew what he was doing, he was standing before her, closing the door behind them with one hand. All the while, his eyes blazed into hers.

Amy felt her pulse spike at the look in his eyes. She had never seen that particular look before from her staid boyfriend. She looked down to her feet, unable to bear the intensity. He closed any remaining space between them, staring down at her. Amy gulped, her eyes straying back to his as though pulled by a magnetic force.

"I'm fine. I think," He said in uncertainty, breathing in her sweet fragrance.

"Sheldon-"

He leaned down, his face dangerously close to hers. Sheldon put his hand on her cheek. Amy's breath caught in her throat.

"Did you mean what you wrote? Did you really dream about me last night?" He asked her, getting right to the point. Sheldon was never one to beat around the bush. Amy licked her dry lips.

"Yes. Of course I meant it. I wouldn't lie to you, Sheldon. Especially about that."

His eyes drifted away from hers for a beat, before lowering to her lips. For another moment, he seemed to be debating about something before he stepped up to her so closely that they were a hairs breath apart. Amy stood still as a statue, breathing in his delicious scent of talc and man.

"Tell me more about this dream you had about me, Amy," He whispered in her ear. His humid breath made Amy shiver. Good god, she wasn't the type to swoon. But Sheldon was turning her into a puddle of goo. She had no idea what alien force had taken up residence inside of her boyfriend. It wasn't like him to invade her personal space. It was even less like him to knowingly use tactics he knew would turn her on.

"Sheldon…what are you-"she began, her voice brittle. Sheldon huffed out a deep breath, halting her. He wanted answers. And he wanted them now. He slid the palm on her cheek down to her clavicle. Amy gasped from the warmth of his touch.

"Tell me. Please," He begged her, not moving an inch. Amy felt like time around them was standing still. "I need to know. I need to hear you say it."

They stared at each other, frozen. Could she tell him everything? What would that mean for them? He was asking her, after all. If he couldn't handle her truth, he wouldn't ask. He had to know that there was a good chance he may hear something he wasn't ready to learn.

Amy gathered her courage as best she could. If they were ever going to move forward, there had to be a tipping point. She reached out, mimicking Sheldon's action and putting her hand upon his chest. He had removed his tie, she presumed, since his dress shirt was unbuttoned and his undershirt peeked out. Resting her hand over his heart, Amy looked him dead in the eyes.

"Why?" She murmured.

'_Honesty is the best policy.'_

"Because…I dreamt of you, too." He whispered in return.

Amy swallowed the deep knot in her throat. _He dreamt of her?_

"You were holding me." She said levelly.

He leaned in, running his nose along her cheek. Amy watched him come closer, locked in his gaze.

"Just holding you?" He inquired curiously. Amy shook her head in the negative.

"No…not just holding me. Kissing me. Claiming me," She said and Sheldon pulled back in shock to meet her clear eyes. She gave him a challenging brow, daring him to retreat.

"Claiming you? Is that…what you want, Amy? To be _claimed_?" He asked her, his voice a strained whisper.

In all the years he'd known Amy, he assumed she was above the sexual restraints that possessiveness put on relationships. And while it was true that was what first attracted him to her at the onset, he couldn't deny the fact Amy Farrah Fowler held endless allure for him. The prospect of _claiming_ her made his heart pound like a drum. He wasn't as clueless as everyone assumed. He knew _exactly_ what Amy meant.

Amy simply met his wide eyes with ones equally fearful. If she made a wrong move here, she could send them both tumbling into an abyss she wasn't sure they'd make it out of. She slid her palm up to his cheek, tenderly cradling his flesh.

"By you, yes. _Only_ you. It was never a choice, Sheldon. It simply _is_. You claimed me the moment you said hello to me. And there is nothing I can do to change it."

'_He did?'…But, how?_

He had so many fears. So many obsessions. So many quirks. So many…endless as the ocean is deep. How could he ever hope to be what she needed, without losing himself in the process? What could he possibly offer her, other than a man who was a germaphobe and OCD driven? She deserved more. She deserved everything. She was an amazing woman who was beautiful, brave, warm, and funny. She thought she was the ugly duckling, when in reality, she was the swan.

"You…really want me…that way?" He managed, still unable to comprehend it after all of this time. Amy nodded her head.

"Of course, I want you. That is a given, Sheldon. I told you after prom…I'm always hoping. That will never change. Even if I have to wait forever. You are enough for me. Just the way you are."

Sheldon closed his eyes briefly as he digested her words. In all of his years, no woman had ever wanted him. They pitied him, probably. Were annoyed by him, surely. But this woman…this one, remarkable woman…she _wanted_ him. _All_ of him. The good, and the bad. And he could admit it now, although it was painfully frightening - he wanted her, too.

Badly.

"May I hold you now?" He asked, pulling back to stare at her intently.

Amy had to lick her lips and swallow, her throat was so dry.

"Yes," She whispered, her eyes glued to his.

"May I kiss you now?" He asked her, this time with more intent.

Amy closed her eyes, the room beginning to spin. This was too much.

"Yes. I already told you…You don't ever have to ask me, Sheldon."

He drew his brows together, focused on her completely.

"Of course I have to ask you, Amy."

Amy smiled a slow, sexy grin.

"Then ask me, Sheldon." She whispered gently, and Sheldon nodded. He nuzzled her neck, sliding his lips up to her ear and kissing the lobe with sensual calculation.

"May I claim you, Amy?" He whispered, his lips caressing the pulse point behind her ear. Amy moaned and gripped his bicep.

What Sheldon couldn't tell her, what he couldn't even tell himself…was that all night, the memory of their kiss haunted him. They'd kissed before, of course. Standing, sitting. But last night, something had changed for Sheldon. If he were being honest, something had changed two days when she came to his classroom. Now, all he could think about was kissing her again. And again.

"Yes," She murmured.

He put his arms around her, pulling her into him. Her body started to shake as he pulled her head to his chest, cradling her there while his arms tightened around her completely. Amy shut her eyes, drinking in his presence. His scent, his overwhelming aura. Sheldon smelled incredible, and felt even better. Amy let out a whimper. More comfortable now, she raised her arms tentatively and crossed them behind Sheldon's back.

"I missed you today, Amy," He admitted quietly, and Amy's eyes opened.

"What?" She questioned in shock, not fully believing her ears. Sheldon rocked her back and forth gently. He was embarrassed at his slip of the tongue, but knew it was too late to take it back now.

"I…missed you."

The vulnerability in his voice stunned her. She had never hear him so out of his depth.

"I missed you too, Sheldon. I thought of you all day. I could barely get any work done."

Sheldon let out a deep sigh.

"I've turned into a hippy, haven't I?" He questioned sadly. Amy laughed.

"Hey…you're doing just fine. Remember…we're in this together."

His eyes glossed down at her.

"Together," He echoed, needing her so much in that moment that he couldn't see straight. "So…how would I go about…claiming you?" He asked innocently, peering down at her.

Amy tilted her head, staring up at him with loving eyes.

"Well, Tex… I hear you're pretty smart. I'm sure you can figure it out." She suggested.

Sheldon's eyes widened at her playful innuendo. In an instant, he backed Amy up the few paces to his door, pressing his body against hers. Amy let out a strangled moan at the welcomed invasion. He slid his hand down her to her hip, and Amy anticipated his lips upon hers.

"What are you doing to me?" Sheldon asked her helplessly. Amy caressed his jaw tenderly as Sheldon gazed at her with longing.

"Maybe what you need done, Dr. Cooper," She whispered.

Sheldon looked at Amy would hooded eyes.

Just then a knock rang out, and the pair jumped apart quickly. They stood a breath apart, breathing heavily and watching each other in fear.

"Open up, Cooper. I know you're in there."

Curses. It was Kripke.

Sheldon gritted his teeth, turning from Amy quickly and strolling over to his desk to sit down. Once seated, he took a deep breath and motioned for Amy to have a seat across from him.

"Please…don't say anything. I don't want that scoundrel-"

Amy nodded, fixing her hair and cutting him off.

"I understand, Sheldon. It's alright," She whispered, having a seat.

Staring at each other in silence, Sheldon cleared his throat.

"Come in."

Kripke flung the door open, marching up to Sheldon without even saying hello. Sheldon stared at him disdainfully.

"What the frig, Cooper? I'm a busy man. I don't have time to waste outside your door."

Sheldon glared at his co-worker, eyes narrowing to slits.

"As you could see if you weren't so rude, I have a guest in my office Dr. Kripke. Now state your business and leave."

Kripke turned to his side, noticing Amy for the first time. He looked between her and Sheldon.

"Aww…It's the lovely Dr. Amy. Meeting her boyfriend for a secret rendezvous." He drawled, making Sheldon's skin crawl and a hot flush to cover his neck.

"That's _Dr. Fowler_ to you. What do you want, Kripke?" Sheldon asked, anger dripping from his voice. He didn't like what he was insinuating. And he sure as shootin' didn't like the way that mongrel was eyeing up his woman.

"I'm sorry…did I interrupt anything?" He asked saucily, sounding anything but sorry. Amy fixed him with impatient stare, while Sheldon looked positively lethal.

"What do you want?" Sheldon spat again.

Kripke rolled his eyes and huffed.

"I needed to discuss Pearson Particle Emissions test with you, seeing how we have to work on that proposal together. But I guess you are otherwise engaged," He said slyly, sidling up next to Amy.

Sheldon's eyes blazed and he stood up before he could think better of his actions. He was already upset that Amy had helped Kripke with his String Theory article, especially since she hadn't mentioned it to him. For some reason, the fact Kripke was in such close proximity to his girlfriend disturbed him greatly. His hands involuntarily balled into fists.

"I'll ask you to kindly stop looking at my girlfriend like that," He hissed, stepping in front of Amy to shield her from the likes of Kripke. Barry merely shrugged, pursing his lips and skirting around Sheldon to peep at Amy.

"It's so nice to see you again, Dr. Fowler." He said, syrupy sweet. "Thank you again for your help with my research. We were all worried about you while you were ill."

Amy smiled professionally.

"That is very kind of you. And you're welcome."

"Do you think you'd like to collaborate on another paper, sometime?"

The request was innocent enough. But Sheldon saw red. He was about to let Kripke have it, when Amy intervened.

"I'm sorry, Dr. Kripke. I've just been given a very arduous project to undertake. I won't have any time for extracurricular activities. But thank you for the offer."

Kripke gave Amy a toothy grin, before turning smug eyes upon Sheldon.

"See if you can tear yourself away from your lovely lady long enough to actually do some work, Cooper."

He stepped up to Sheldon, elbowing him in the rib. "Unless of course, you're looking for a little afternoon delight," He said, winking. "In that case, I'll leave you to alone."

Sheldon gulped in fear. He didn't like at all where this was going.

Amy stared at Kripke curiously as he turned to leave.

"Good day, Dr. Fowler." He smirked, and Sheldon let out the breath in his lungs forcefully.

"He is a strange man," Amy said thoughtfully, watching him go. Sheldon narrowed his eyes.

"Strange doesn't even begin to cover it."

Amy raised a brow, considering.

"I know you both have your differences, Sheldon. But as a fellow Scientist, he's always been very professional with me, and a perfect gentleman."

Sheldon balked at her words. "Gentleman? That man is _no_ gentleman," He sneered. But as he looked at Amy's confused face, the ugly truth hit him:

Neither are you, Cooper.

'_Word around the University is I'm giving her sex organs a proper jostling…'_

Oh, dear Lord.

Sheldon suddenly felt ill. The guilt he'd pushed aside all of these years at his own callous and crude remarks hit him like a mack truck. He literally felt the blood drain from his face. How could he have _said _such a thing? And how could he have encouraged Kripke's behavior?

Oh, it was all too easy. Save face on his mediocre work, by putting his girlfriend's reputation out to dry.

Amy watched Sheldon's composure vanish, worried as she watched him shrink before her.

"Sheldon? What is it?"

He feared he was going to have a major panic attack.

"Amy…there is something I have to confess to you about Kripke," He began, fear and panic settling in. Amy merely watched him, saying nothing.

Sheldon came around to his chair, falling into it heavily. He dared to look into her eyes, and felt like crying at the patience he saw there. He looked away quickly, unable to bear the revulsion she was certain to show once he told his secret.

"Do you remember when Kripke and I worked together on the fusion reactor paper? And how my work was subpar to his?" He asked, his eyes downcast. Amy nodded although he couldn't see.

"Yes, Sheldon. I remember. What about it?"

Dear Lord…

"He told me at the time he understood why my work was so inferior to his. It was because I had a girlfriend, who…took up a lot of my energy. At night. And that was probably why I wasn't focused on my work. At first, I didn't understand what he meant. Then… I did. But I didn't correct him. And then…" He stopped, shame and anger at himself building.

"Then?" Amy prompted gently. Sheldon's eyes snapped to hers, and he looked positively fearful.

"Then…I…embellished. It was easier for me to allow Kripke to think I was worn out from…nightly coitus with you – then admit my work was inferior. He was appeased by my predicament, and strangely enough after my lie, my work did improve. Amy, I am so sorry for using you like that. Now every time Kripke sees you, he leers at you like some deranged degenerate. It makes me sick to think I played a part in this," He admitted quietly, his eyes filling with angry tears.

Amy's eyes widened. "I see," She said, her palms smoothing out the hem of her skirt which lay flat on her knees.

Sheldon eyed her like a hawk, not sure if she were angry, hurt, or disappointed.

"Amy…say something. Please." He begged, fearing the worst when a minute passed and she hadn't said anything yet. Finally, she sat forward and folded her hands before her on Sheldon's desk.

"Sheldon... I know what he said. And I know what you said. I've known for a very long time."

Sheldon's mouth fell open in shock.

"I'm sorry…What?" He choked out, the blood beginning to pound in his ears. The idea that Kripke told her of their conversations or worse, actually _asked_ her about it made him want to murder him. He tried to keep his cool as Amy gazed at him calmly.

"Penny told me everything years ago."

The room began to spin as Sheldon processed her words.

"Pen…She…That Nebraskan blabbermouth!" He seethed, jumping up from his desk to pace wildly. While he wasn't happy about his actions, he thought he could trust Penny not to tell Amy what an ungentlemanly mistake he made. Yet in all of that, one word leapt out at him like a ghoul in the dark at Halloween.

Everything.

Penny told her…_everything_? Everything, as in what he said about coitus with Amy being a possibility?

The room spun and black dots clouded his vision. Amy noticed his distress at once, and she jumped up to steady him.

"Breathe, Sheldon. It's okay. You're okay," She crooned, but Sheldon's eyes met hers in trepidation.

"What did she tell you? What did…what did Penny say?" He croaked out, embarrassed and ashamed and livid all at once. Amy's gaze softened as she gazed at his panic stricken face.

"Sheldon, please. Sit down and calm down. It's alright. I want you to take deep breaths and try to relax. You're going to pass out," She said gently, guiding him to his chair. He stood very close to her, allowing her to help him down. Once seated, he grabbed her hand and wouldn't allow her to move.

"Please tell me what she told you, Amy." He begged, his breathing still erratic. Leaning back against his desk, Amy sighed.

"She only told me that due to Kripke's…assumptions…he let you off the hook about your work not being stellar. And that you made some colorful remarks about our…lovemaking…being whimsical. Or something to that effect."

A deep blush covered Sheldon from head to toe, and he hung his head low.

"I can't believe she told you that," He whispered, shaking his head back and forth. Amy tentatively reached out and placed her hand on his shoulder. Sheldon jerked back from her tender touch, feeling more ashamed of himself than ever. He didn't deserve Amy's comfort. What was worse was the hurt look in her eyes at his pulling away.

"Sheldon…Penny only told me because Leonard overheard Kripke telling some of his cronies about what you said. She thought I should know."

Sheldon shook his head. Oh, God…so Kripke had spread it around the halls of Caltech like a cancer. And Amy worked there now, as well. Was his dear Amy's reputation tarnished because of him?

Sheldon hung his head in despair.

"You shouldn't _have_ to know. I should never have said what I said. I'm no better than that creep." He whispered, hating himself.

Amy smacked her lips together and sighed. For many moments, they were both silent as what he said hung in the air.

"Do you hate me now, Amy?" He finally asked, his voice cracking painfully. He didn't dare to meet her eyes.

"No, Sheldon. Of course not. But I am surprised. It's not like you to lie."

Sheldon gasped and bit his lip.

"I don't know why I did. It's not like I truly care what Kripke thinks about me. It's just…when he insinuated that scenario, I didn't correct him. I am so sorry, Amy. All of this time you knew. All of this time…what must you think of me? I feel horrible for using you in such a way, to make myself look good to the likes of Barry Kripke. I sullied your reputation, and opened you up to ridicule and innuendo from that swine."

Amy put her fingers against Sheldon's mouth, stopping his rant. He gaped at her in shock as she ran her thumb across his bottom lip.

"I know why you said what you said. You couldn't bear being thought of as less than Barry. He gave you a way out, without making yourself look bad. You took it. I didn't even work here then, so technically what was said between you two was just shooting the breeze between two testosterone driven males. Do I like what you said? No, Sheldon. I don't. What you described so flippantly has been my heart's desire for a while with you. And you talked about it with as much tact as a 16 old boy in a locker room. I expected better from you. But I forgave you."

Sheldon blinked rapidly, absorbing her words.

"I didn't realize what I was doing at the time. Afterwards, though, I understood that the lie I told made me look like a sex crazed cad. And it painted you in a very poor light. Oh, Amy…I am so ashamed of myself. When he was looking at you like you were a steak earlier…I just knew I had to confess what I did."

Amy nodded.

"Sheldon…I know that it's not easy for you to allow feelings to rule you. I also know that you are different. I try to make allowances for that. But I won't be a doormat, okay? What happened with Kripke? Let's just forget about it and move on."

Sheldon leaned back in his chair, his breathing leveling out.

"Alright, Amy." He said gently, full of contrition. Whereas before a comfortable tension had settled over the room, now a very uncomfortable tension settled instead.

Sheldon's office phone rang, and he stared at it for a beat before snatching it up in agitation.

"Dr. Cooper," He barked, his face morphing from angry to bored in the span of seconds.

"Yes, Sir. I'm on my way."

He hung up, meeting Amy's expectant gaze.

"That was Dr. Gablehauser. He needs to see me about the finals today."

Amy nodded, smiling sadly.

"I guess I should be going, anyway. I have some work to finish before I leave. Will you be alright, Sheldon?"

Sheldon nodded, his gaze downtrodden.

"Yes. I'll be fine. I'm sorry, Amy." He whispered. "I'm sorry about everything."

Amy nodded in return, walking to the door. He followed her, stopping a respectable distance apart.

"Amy?" He called, anxiety in his voice. Amy turned to face him, surprised at how pale he looked. She had to ease his mind somehow.

"We're okay, Sheldon. We're fine. Better than fine," She added, smiling shyly. The relief on his face was clearly etched, and he let out a large breath.

"Okay," He repeated, his eyes following her as she opened the door and closed it behind her.

How was it that he couldn't ever do anything right by Amy? He could still feel Amy's warm skin upon his own. Now, she was gone.

Sheldon put his forehead on the door, missing her already.

And truly wondering if they were, in fact, better than fine.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Penny balanced a box on her hip as she shut her mailbox with the other hand, cursing when the mail she was holding tumbled to the ground in a messy heap.

"Damn," She spat, trying to bend down and pick up the letters. Her attention was caught by the lobby door opening and Sheldon stepping inside. When their eyes met, her face broke out in a relieved smile. His face, however, was set in stony anger. Penny frowned.

"Hey, Sheldon. Everything alright?" She asked cautiously, her frown deepening as he narrowed his already steely eyes at her.

"No, everything is_ not_ alright," He stated coldly, his lips set in a thin, hard line. Penny actually gulped; she had never seen Sheldon so angry before, especially not directed at her.

"Well…is there something I can do to help?" She offered gently, trying not to upset him further. Her words seemed to anger him even more.

"Oh, I think you've _helped_ me enough, you big mouthed gossip. I thought I could trust you. I thought you were my friend. But all of these years, you've been nothing more than a spy. How could you, Penny? I told you and Leonard what I told you in confidence. I never thought you would go behind my back and tell Amy-"

Penny dropped her box carefully, folding her arms in defense.

"Just a minute…what are you talking about, Sheldon? What did I tell Amy?"

Her voice sounded entirely too innocent for Sheldon's liking. He glared at her hotly.

"You told Amy what transpired between Barry Kripke and myself. You told her, in Amy's own words…_everything_. Is that right, Penny? Did you tell her _everything_? Did you tell her what I told you about my fear of touching her? How I was working toward resolving my intimacy issues? Did you tell her how _fond_ I was of her? Did you both have a good laugh about it afterwards?

Penny's mouth dropped open, both from the surprise of Sheldon's words and the jolt of fear she got from his anger. And he_ was_ angry. He was seething. She stepped back, holding out her hands in supplication.

"Sheldon…listen. I didn't just tell Amy to gossip about it. And of course we did not have a laugh about you. Kripke was talking about you and Leonard overheard. It was after Amy arrived at Caltech. I thought she should know, in case she ever bumped into Kripke and he made some slime ball remark. I didn't do it to hurt you, or Amy. Please believe me, Sheldon. I am your friend."

Sheldon scowled at Penny, chuckling mirthlessly.

"My _friend? _If you were truly my friend, you would stay out of my relationship with Amy. I know that you've told Amy before that she could do better than me. I know how all of you think of Amy as some martyr who is wasting her time. I know you all view me as a frightened rabbit. But do you know what hurts more than anything? I trusted you. You know how hard it is for me to trust people. But I trusted _you_ Penny. You betrayed that trust."

He was hyperventilating now, harsh pants escaping his mouth and his eyes wild.

"Sheldon…Amy was alright with what happened. She understood. No harm was done." She said soothingly, but Sheldon's anger was at the boiling point.

"No harm done…well thank you, Penny. Thank you for playing moderator in my love life. What I said was wrong, but it was for _me_ to tell Amy. Not you. I'll thank you from here on out to mind your own business. Do I make myself clear?" He asked angrily, and Penny shrank back at the venom in her friend's voice. Tears sprang to her eyes as she nodded.

"Yes, Sheldon. Crystal clear." She answered, her voice small.

Without another word, Sheldon turned around and strode out of the lobby door, slamming it against the wall.

Penny stood there, trying to get her breathing under control and gather her thoughts. Sheldon's outburst had shocked her. What in the world_ happened_ today?

A frightening thought took root in Penny's mind. What if Sheldon took off? She worried. What if he left Amy again? Amy couldn't take that now, after all she'd been through.

Panicking, she reached in her pocket with a shaky hand for her cell. Tapping out the number, she waited impatiently while it rang.

"Leonard, Sweetie…We may have a problem."

A/N- So…Sheldon is not happy. He might seem OOC right now, but he's very upset. All of these emotions are turning him inside out. And his jealousy over Kripke has reached critical mass. Speaking of Kripke… It is virtually impossible for me to integrate his lisp here. I wrote his words normally, you'll just have to hear it in your head. :)


	19. Chapter 19

~Chapter 19~

A/N- Wow, your feedback has been wonderful. Some very definite opinions about how Sheldon handled this situation. It had to happen, after all…every Shipper has been waiting for this to come back at some point. Thank you so very much for all of the lovely words.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…You know I never want to let you down. It cuts me up to see you sad. And I wish that I could undo what I've done. Give back the faith in me you had…Oh yeah- You know I love you more than anyone. But I get a little wrapped up in myself. But you know I never want to do you wrong. Bring into question what we have…" Gotye – Giving Me a Chance

Penny and Leonard stood outside Amy's door, the pair exchanging apprehensive glances. Leonard was still reeling from Penny's description of how Sheldon reacted. While he didn't like the way his best friend spoke to his fiance, he could understand where Sheldon's anger came from. It was a well- known fact in their group that Penny was a gossip. But she didn't go out of her way to hurt anyone. And she would never purposely hurt Sheldon nor Amy.

Leonard couldn't imagine Sheldon being that angry with Penny, but one look at her sad face told him that it happened, all right…and that Sheldon was seriously upset.

"I'm worried, Leonard. What if Sheldon goes off the rails again and leaves because of this? Amy will never forgive me. I'm not so sure she forgave us for last time." She whispered, not wanting Amy to overhear her.

Leonard patted Penny's back soothingly.

"We just all need to calm down, Penny. I'm sure Sheldon is just pouting like normal. You know how he gets when he feels out of control."

Penny shook her head, unconvinced.

"No, Leonard. Not this time. He wasn't pouting. He was angry. Seething mad. I've never seen that look in his eyes before." Penny said, frowning at the memory.

Leonard considered her words.

"You know…he might just be angry at himself. He got himself into this mess all on his own. I love Sheldon, but sometimes he doesn't think before he speaks. I remember the flippant way he behaved when he admitted to us what happened. To find out now that Amy knew along, must be a blow for him."

Penny nodded, but she didn't feel any better. Leonard knocked gently, and they both gathered their courage.

The door swung open, revealing Amy in her clothes from earlier. She was about to take a shower when they knocked.

"Hey guys, what are you doing here?" She greeted them with a smile, which quickly slid off her face as her eyes darted from one to the other. They were looking at her with a mixture of trepidation and pity. Her breathe caught in her throat immediately.

"What is it? Is something wrong with Sheldon?" She asked frantically, her voice rising. Penny grimaced and took Leonard's hand for support.

"Sweetie, listen…has Sheldon been by here in the last hour? Did he call or text you?"

Amy shook her head, worry beginning to creep in.

"No. I saw him at the University two hours ago. Why? What's happened?"

Leonard stepped forward to place a gentle hand on Amy's shoulder.

"We're sure he's fine, Amy. He had a fight with Penny a little while ago, and stormed off. We're just worried about him. He isn't answering my calls or texts."

Amy thought back to the spats her boyfriend and her best friend engaged in over the years. In no instance had she ever known him to 'storm off' because of it.

"A fight? What about?" She asked in confusion.

Penny bit her lip nervously.

"He was pretty livid about my telling you about Barry Kripke. He said I betrayed his trust. He also thinks I made a joke about the whole thing to you."

Amy scrunched up her face, not liking this at all.

"I knew he was upset earlier. I should have waited for him after his meeting with Dr. Gablehauser." She said, her voice remorseful.

Leonard raised a brow to her.

"What are we missing here? Exactly what happened today with Kripke?"

Sighing, Amy led them over to sit down.

"Kripke came by his office today while Sheldon and I were in there. Talking," She threw in, fearing her blush would give her away. "They had their usual sparring match, but Sheldon got very upset at the way Kripke was talking to me. After Kripke left, Sheldon fessed up about what he said to him about me. I'm sorry, Penny. I told Sheldon I already knew because you told me."

Penny nodded, not angry with her friend, but at herself.

"I'm the one who is sorry, Amy. I should never have told you. I wanted to be loyal to you and keep you informed, but it wasn't my place. Sheldon was very upset. I should have known he'd react this way. I know how private he is. I just don't want him to freak out and…" She left the sentence unspoken, her eyes swinging to Amy's startled ones.

"Did he say he was leaving?" Amy asked fearfully, moving quickly to her purse to check her phone for texts or missed calls. Her screen was blank, and Amy began to fear the worst.

"Oh, no. I knew he wasn't himself when I left. He was so pale and upset. What if he-…"

Leonard walked over to her and put his hand on her arm reassuringly.

"Hey, Amy…calm down. Sheldon won't leave again. I know he won't. He was probably just embarrassed that you knew what he said. And a little mad at himself as well. You know what a gentleman Sheldon prides himself on being. The whole Kripke situation just sort of snowballed for Sheldon. He didn't know how to react at the time. I think he considered his words to be harmless. But viewing them through your eyes…well, I think he's realized how bad they sounded in retrospect."

Amy nodded absently, already thinking ahead to where he could be.

Penny caught Leonard's attention, and the pair excused themselves to the kitchen.

"Why don't you text Howard and Raj, and see if they've heard from them or are willing to try and find him."

Leonard agreed. "Yeah, okay. I'll go out to the hall. Stay here with Amy." He suggested, making his way outside.

Penny came back to Amy's side, ushering her to sit.

"He'll be fine, Amy. He just needs to cool off. You'll see," Penny said, trying to sound positive.

All that Amy could do was nod and hope for the best.

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Two hours later, Sheldon sat at the bus stop blinking lazily as one bus after another passed him by. He had no desire to go anywhere, or see anyone. He just wanted to go home and lock himself in his safe bedroom. But even that prospect was ruined; that Nebraskan busybody was probably draping herself all over his apartment. Couldn't she and Leonard stay at her place? Why did she have to infiltrate his space?

He didn't even realize his thoughts for a moment, when it hit him: previously, he would panic at the idea of Leonard and Penny leaving. But now…all he wanted was for them to leave him in peace.

Sheldon frowned as he thought about how the scenario probably went as Penny shared his private secret with Amy. They probably had a good laugh at his expense. Yeah, right…as though_ his_ coitus could be whimsical and inventive. He had no idea what he was doing. He was running around in circles inside his head lately, and it terrified him.

Sheldon sighed, feeling disgusted at his shortcomings. Everyone was laughing at him. Laughing at the 34 year old virgin. Laughing at the obsessive compulsive crazy Physicist who didn't know how to satisfy his woman. The hardest part was not knowing what Kripke thought that about him, or even his friends. The hardest part…was not knowing what Amy thought.

Their date last night had been absolutely wonderful. He felt more free than he ever had before, sitting on his couch with Amy in his arms. He never knew it could be like that; the coiled tension was exhilarating. And the feeling of Amy on top of him, kissing him senseless…

Sheldon closed his eyes and let his perfect memory transform him back to the moment. She felt so good. She smelled so good. Her eyes sparkled with love and longing for him. And once again, he freaked out when she innocently touched his belt.

Hot tears began to pool in Sheldon's eyes. He would never be what Amy needed. He was a failure, and the stark reality of it was settling in. He was fooling himself, wasn't he? Trying to act like this was normal. Like _he_ was normal. He wasn't normal. And he never would be.

What was worse, was that he took his innocent girlfriend's reputation and dragged it through the mud, all so that cretin Kripke wouldn't know his work was not up to scratch. To think that mongrel had told all of Caltech about his sweet Amy being a…a…sex goddess…made Sheldon want to kill him.

Sheldon didn't know who he loathed more in that moment: Barry, or himself.

A familiar grey mini cooper stopped in front of him at the curb, its tinted passenger window rolling down. Sheldon stared sheepishly as the driver came into view.

"Sheldon…get in and I'll drive you home."

Sheldon pouted, turning his head sideways.

"I don't want to go home, Howard. Thank you, but no."

Howard pursed his lips.

"Sheldon, I'm in a bus lane here. Get in before a bus stops and plows into me. Come on, we'll go for dinner if you don't want to go home."

Sheldon's pout vanished, but his face was just as morose.

"No thank you, Howard. I want to be alone."

At a loss, Howard used the only trick in his arsenal he could think of to sway his friend.

"Come on, Sheldon. You have Amy worried sick. Leonard and Penny are at her place right now trying to calm her down. She's freaking out that you are going to run off."

This made Sheldon even more agitated. He snapped is eyes back guiltily to his friend.

"Is she okay? Oh, dear…I can't let her get upset. She may get sick again. I can't-"

Howard raised his hand to stop Sheldon's rant.

"Sheldon, she's alright. She's obviously worried about you because of the fight you had with Penny. She's worried you're going to leave again."

Sheldon huffed angrily.

"I'm _not_ leaving again. Why does everyone think any little thing is going to make me run away? I'm not a child, you know. I just want time to be alone."

Howard nodded.

"I get that, Sheldon. I do. But maybe being alone right now is the worst thing you could be. I'm here for you, so let's go get some food and see if we can resolve whatever is bothering you."

Sheldon gave Howard a long stare. While he was the last person he ever expected to trust as much as Leonard, it was true that over the past year they had grown closer. He was also tired of running away from his problems. Perhaps a neutral third party could help. Reluctantly, he gathered his messenger bag and stepped up to the car.

"Alright. Thank you Howard."

Howard smiled, settling back into his seat.

They drove in silence, Howard stealing glances out of the corner of his eye at Sheldon.

"So…Leonard called and told me what happened between you and Penny. I told him I would look for you. What happened today that made you freak out?"

Sheldon stared straight ahead, his anger still not abated on the Penny front, but it was lessening the more he thought about it.

"Howard…I know that everyone thinks of me as an emotionless robot. While it's true that for the most part I was okay with that perception, things have changed. Greatly. And it hurts my feelings to think my friends think I have no feelings."

The hurt in Sheldon's voice was clear, and Howard turned to stare at his friend in surprise.

"Sheldon…nobody thinks you are an emotionless robot. We just know that you've never placed a lot of emphasis on human interaction. And you yourself prized how you considered yourself to be a Homo Novus. You can't blame us for just adhering to your wishes."

Sheldon turned a fraction to gauge his friend's sincerity. Satisfied that Howard was not being rude, he bit his lip and nodded.

"Point taken. But things have changed now." He said quietly, turning to gaze at the passing scenery. Howard glanced at Sheldon curiously.

"What's changed, Sheldon?" He asked gently.

He wanted to lie to Howard. He wanted to tell him that even though he himself brought it up, that Howard should mind his own business. But something inside of him couldn't do it. Taking a deep breath, he admitted the truth.

"Amy."

Howard kept his eyes fixed on the road as he digested what Sheldon said.

"Amy's changed?" He asked, and Sheldon laughed in self-deprecation.

"No…Amy hasn't changed. The depth of my feelings for Amy has changed. And it scares me to death."

Howard nearly crashed the car, as Sheldon's words sunk in. Pulling into the nearest bar and grill he saw, he turned off the engine and turned in his seat to see Sheldon's downcast profile.

"Sheldon…I know love can be scary. I was petrified when I realized I loved Bernie. Even more so when I asked her to marry me. It's never easy giving a part of your heart away. But you have one thing on your side that skews in your favor. Amy is crazy about you. You don't have to wonder if she wants to be with you. You know the answer already. That right there should make you happy.

Sheldon lowered his eyes.

"I know that, Howard. And it does. It's just…I keep making terrible mistakes in our relationship.

Howard chuckled, good naturedly.

"Yeah, I heard. Leonard told me Amy filled them in about what Kripke said today. Look, if that were me and Bernie in that situation…I'd have knocked him flat on his ass. You have no reason to feel embarrassed. You were just protecting your woman."

Sheldon rolled his eyes and groaned loudly.

"I'm the one who let this whole thing happen to _begin_ with, Howard. I let that…that…lothario think Amy and I were having coitus six ways to Sunday. Her virtue was compromised by my callous display of male domination. And it wasn't even to outshine him in that department. It was because I was…jealous. Jealous of the fact his work was leaps and bounds ahead of my own. I used Amy. How could I ever face her again?"

It was Howards turn to groan now.

"Come on, Sheldon. You think you're the first guy to brag about sex with a girl to another man? Guys do it all the time."

Sheldon grimaced in distaste.

"See my point? I'm not like the rest of them. Or least I wasn't. My lie has left me feeling…tainted. And I tainted Amy's reputation. Because I got away with it, I thought I was okay with that. But today…"

"Today?" Howard prompted, waiting patiently for Sheldon to compose himself.

"Today Kripke came by my office and made a scene. Just as Amy and I were about to…talk. I told her the truth once he left, and she admitted she knew. She knew all along. Penny had told her _everything_."

He spat the last word out like it was poison.

"Ah," Howard said in understanding. "Well…we all know our Penny's penchant for gossip."

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "Penchant? Good lord, if that woman ever learns to keep her mouth closed for 24 hours I would sell my entire comic book collection."

Howard gave Sheldon a look of indignation.

"Hey, what have you got to complain about? I'm sure Bernie has told Penny _every_ detail of our sex life. You don't see me running for the hills, do you?"

He mulled over that a moment, meeting Howard's amused face.

"Well, when you put it like that…it's not so bad. Amy and I haven't done anything to incite gossip. Yet," He threw in, and even though Howard shot him an incredulous look at that statement, he didn't press Sheldon further on its meaning.

"See? It was a long time ago. And Amy seems fine with it. Trust me, Sheldon…there will probably be a lot more troublesome times in your relationship than this snafu. Let it go."

Sheldon bit his lip, pouting.

"I guess I shouldn't have gone off on Penny like I did. I was just hurt and embarrassed. I trusted her to keep my confidence. Knowing that Amy knew all of this time that I said those horrible things…I guess I was angrier at myself then Penny."

Howard patted Sheldon's shoulder gently, surprised when he didn't flinch or pull away.

"Look, buddy. Kripke is a creep. We all know how he goads you. And I'm not saying you not setting him straight was right. But I can see why you did what you did. I have a suspicion Amy does, as well.

Sheldon looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Howard…may I ask you a question?"

Howard nodded in the affirmative.

"Sure, what is it?"

"How did you know? That Bernadette was…you know. The 'One'."

Howard gaped at Sheldon, dumbstruck. His friend looked positively terrified. It wasn't often that Sheldon Cooper asked him for advice. He would try to give him the best he could.

"I just…did, Sheldon. I couldn't imagine living another day without her. When you want to be a better man because of the way she makes you feel…then you know. It's love."

Sheldon absently stared through the windshield.

"For years, I've tried to keep Amy at a distance. I've treated her like a doormat so many times. I don't know why I did that," He said, the anger toward himself visible. Howard shrugged.

"Well…from what I can gather, Sheldon…You were afraid to get too close, because if you lost her, the pain would be too hard to bear. She's a really good woman, you know. She is funny, talented, and smart as a whip…and yeah. I can see a very beautiful person under all that…wool. Maybe you've had a wakeup call. It's time to be honest with her."

Sheldon nodded. His Master's degree holding friend had given him a lot to think about.

"Come on. Dinner's on me. You need to eat something," Howard said kindly, and Sheldon smiled at his friend in gratitude.

"Thank you, Howard," He said, feeling better.

"Don't mention it, buddy."

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Later that evening, Sheldon opened the door to 4A cautiously. It was after 9, but Leonard and Penny were still up, sitting on the couch watching TV. His eyes met theirs hesitantly. He figured if he was going to begin acting like an adult, he'd better start now. He'd never yelled at a woman before. The memory made him feel like a monster. An image of his father yelling at his mother floated across his mind. He pushed it aside.

"Hello," He said cordially, looking at each of his friends in turn. Penny offered a tentative smile, and Leonard offered a 'Hey'.

This was awkward. Very awkward.

The three friends were still as statues, and Penny rolled her eyes at how uncomfortable it was becoming.

"Sheldon-…"She began, but Sheldon pursed his lips and cut her off.

"Penny…I am very sorry for my outburst earlier. It was rude of me to behave so poorly. I know that you never meant to hurt me. You've been a good friend to me, and I do trust you. Please…forgive me."

Penny and Leonard stared at Sheldon, slack jawed. She felt braver now that he sounded more like the Sheldon she knew, and rose from the couch to put her hand on his arm.

"Sheldon, I am so sorry for telling Amy. You're right; I shouldn't have meddled. I never meant to upset you. But when Leonard told me what Kripke said about Amy, I didn't like it. And I knew, at the time, that you weren't going to do anything to correct him. Maybe I was wrong for interfering, but I was only thinking of Amy.

Sheldon frowned at his friend.

"Unlike me," He said sadly, "Who told Pasadena's biggest pervert that Amy likes my genitals and I'm giving them to her on a nightly basis."

Penny tilted her head in displeasure.

"Really? You said _that_?" She asked, and Sheldon shot her an exasperated glare.

"Okay, listen…forget about that. I know things have been hard for you lately to process. But you're really trying. Amy knows you're trying. Don't be so hard on yourself."

Sheldon went and sat in his spot.

"Penny…I never realized before how horrible what I did was. I've always prided myself on being a gentleman. To think I said those things…and to Kripke, no less…I'm so ashamed of myself. And then I took out my anger on you. I'm sorry. It's all my fault. If I hadn't gone along with Kripke, and just admitted my work wasn't as good as his at the time, you never would have _had_ to tell Amy.

"Have you talked to Amy?" Leonard asked gently. Sheldon could merely shake his head back and forth.

"No. I don't know what to say. She didn't seem angry at me, but I'm afraid to face her. What if she tells me she can't trust me anymore?" He asked seriously.

"That's not going to happen, Sheldon. She loves you. We were over attt her apartment earlier, and she was very worried about you." Penny said.

Sheldon felt even worse now, knowing he'd made her worry. He glanced at his watch, grimacing.

"It's too late now, anyway. I don't want to bother her."

Penny met Leonard's eyes, and he nodded.

"Come on, Sheldon. We'll drive you over there. Don't let this sit tonight. Amy needs to know you're alright."

Leonard was right. As usual. This was becoming an altogether too frequent occurrence lately, Sheldon thought.

"Okay."

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Amy lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. She was unable to fall asleep, glaring at the clock in annoyance.

It was passed 10 pm, and she was still worried about Sheldon. Even more so that he hadn't called or texted her all evening. She took comfort in the fact she received a text earlier from Howard, though.

'_Hey, Amy. Found Sheldon. He's fine; just a little upset. Don't worry, okay? We went to dinner and I dropped him off about an hour ago. Talk soon. Bye.'_

She was trying not to jump to conclusions. She knew Sheldon finding out that she knew all about that business with Kripke was bound to shake him up. She didn't think he'd take it this hard, though.

When Penny first told her what had happened almost two years ago, she was indeed shocked. At first, she was flattered that Sheldon had invented such a colorful story.

Then the doubts set in. Why would he willingly discuss their sex life, as non-existent as it was, with Barry Kripke of all people? The harsh truth crept in, plain as day- he was only doing it to save face to him. It hurt, but in time she understood. Sheldon hated admitting he was inferior. The only area of his life he felt he could control was his work. And lately, even that had been taken away from him. She resigned not to tell Sheldon she ever knew about what he said. Until today, that was never a problem.

She was startled by a knock at her front door. Then another. And another. She breathed a sigh of relief, even as a flood of nerves bombarded her.

Jumping out of bed, she padded her way over to the door to look through the security hole.

Sheldon stood on the other side, looking extremely apprehensive. Amy opened the door slowly as not to further spook him.

He looked terrible. Tired, rumpled, and his eyes were red.

"Hi," She whispered gently, and Sheldon lowered his gaze.

"Hello." He murmured back, still not able to meet her eyes.

"Would you like to come in?" She asked, and Sheldon looked up, startled.

"How can you even bear the sight of me?" He asked, his voice pained. Amy's gaze softened.

"Sheldon…come in. Please. We need to talk."

Sheldon nodded, fearing this was it. She was going to tell him that she'd had enough. He sluggishly walked over the threshold, feeling like he was being led to the gallows. When Amy motioned for him to sit down, he woodenly complied.

"Are you alright, Sheldon?" She asked quietly, her voice sweet and caring. Why did she always have to be so sweet? He nodded, before clearing his throat.

"I'm better. But the question is, how are _you_?"

Amy pursed her lips. "I'm fine. I was worried about you, is all. When Leonard and Penny came by earlier, I feared the worst."

He looked away from her, his eyes downcast.

_Always letting her down,_ he lamented to himself.

"Of course you did," He said softly. The sound of his voice broke Amy's heart. "It's not like over the years I've given you reasons to have faith in me."

Amy shook her head.

"That's not true, Sheldon. I have _always_ had faith in you.

Sheldon lowered his head.

"You give me more credit than I deserve, Amy."

Amy didn't know how to respond to that. She cautiously put her hand on his. He didn't shrink away, so that was something, right?

"What happened with Penny, Sheldon? She was pretty upset herself. You didn't have to take out your anger on her. She was only being a good friend and trying to warn me." Amy said firmly, yet with an air of kindness. Sheldon felt truly chastised and could barely manage a nod.

"She…she told you something I never wanted you to know. Not just because what I said was vulgar and disrespectful, but because I should have been the one to protect you, Amy. Not throw you under the bus to make myself look good. I feel so ashamed."

Amy scooted over a fraction closer to Sheldon.

"Sheldon…I told you in your office today that I already knew what happened. I've already gotten past it. I didn't even work there at the time. And, I know what a creep Kripke can be to you."

Sheldon's eyes shot to hers, his brows narrowing dramatically.

"If he's such a creep, then why did you agree to help him with his String Theory article?"

He didn't mean for his voice to sound so jealous. But he couldn't hold in the anger he felt toward his co-worker any longer.

Amy shrugged.

"Sheldon, that was to help a fellow Scientist. It wasn't anything personal or because I even like Barry Kripke. And to be honest, I probably won't help him out again. I didn't like the way he spoke to you today.

Sheldon gasped, chuffing loudly.

"See, Amy? That is the point. You always look out for me. You are my girlfriend. I should never have said what I said. The fault isn't with Penny. Or even with Kripke. The blame lies squarely on me."

Amy sat back, clasping her hands together.

"May I ask you something, Sheldon?" She asked, her voice sounding like a little girl. Sheldon gulped. He had a feeling whatever this question was, it wouldn't be easy to answer. He nodded, answering softly.

"Yes."

Amy took a deep breath, blowing it out slowly.

"How was it so easy to say those things to Kripke, about…being intimate with me…and yet whenever I've brought it up, even in jest…you shrink back like it's the most appalling thing imaginable. Does the idea of coitus with me really repulse you _that _much?"

Amy's voice sounded bleak and hurt. _Repulse_ him? Was she _joking_? It was all he could do lately not to rip her clothing off and ravish her. How could she think otherwise?

_She has a point, Cooper. You've never touched her before last month, at least not of your own free will. Is it any wonder she feels confused? Your words and your actions contradict each other._

Sheldon felt like he had been kicked in the gut. He stared at her blankly. '_You are a bastard'_, he thought darkly. Those companions that were his ever present company since Amy's illness, self-loathing and despair, tapped him on the shoulder laughing like hyenas.

"No, Amy. That's the problem. _My_ problem. I never thought it was going to happen before. I never…wanted it to happen before. But now…"

"Now?" She prompted gently, bending her head down and trying to catch his eye. He looked at her from under his lashes.

"Now…I know it's not a question of if, but when. And I'm just…scared, Amy. I've never felt this way before. About anyone. I don't know what I'm doing, and I'm terrified I'm going to hurt you. I'm sorry. I just never learned how to do this," He lamented, turning around and hiding his face in shame.

Amy grabbed his hands, surprised his were cold as ice.

"Sheldon, I want you to understand something. I don't expect you to suddenly have all of the answers. I don't have them myself. But I love you enough to want to find them with you. I think we can do that together. If you want the same things I do, then we have got to start being honest with each other. I know you're afraid. I am too."

"I know," He said quietly. "But before, it was easy to lie to myself. I could do it then. I could play the part. I can't anymore, Amy. I'm exhausted."

Amy looked at her boyfriend with gentle eyes.

"What changed?" She asked tenderly, afraid if she didn't get this out of him now, he would lock it back inside of him forever. And after everything they'd been through the last few weeks, there was no way that was an option.

Sheldon smiled at her sadly.

"Truthfully? When I found you on that floor, bleeding. I saw a future I was afraid to want being taken away from me. I didn't even realize how _much_ I wanted it until I almost lost it. And now…I know the difference. I know the truth."

Amy tilted her head, not gathering his meaning.

"What do you mean? What truth?" She asked him curiously, transfixed by the look he was giving her. She had no idea what to brand that look, and she considered herself a Sheldon Cooper expert.

Sheldon scooted closer to her on the couch. He was struggling with something, she could see. She was about to speak when he cut her off gently, his eyes closing as he forced out the words she never wanted to hear.

"I don't want to have coitus with you, Amy." He whispered, his voice cracking painfully.

Amy felt the bottom drop out from beneath her. It was a good thing she was sitting down. Otherwise, she'd be on the floor. She felt the tears gather in her eyes and she knew she had to get him out of there before she made a fool of herself. This was the scenario she had always tried to prepare herself for; the one where Sheldon just couldn't bring himself to lower that final barrier. She told him that she was always hoping, but that he was enough as he was. Had she meant it? Yes. Without a doubt. Yet she mourned the idea of never being able to physically express her love for him. If he never wanted a physical relationship with her, she would have to make that painful choice. She loved him. More than her own life. So the choice had been made for her.

Steeling herself, she tried to gather her strength to meet his gaze head on. She cursed herself that she was so weak, especially when he was being honest with her as she'd asked.

"I…I see," She stuttered, fearing she would literally die on this couch. That was, until Sheldon released her hands to slide his own up her neck, and into her hair. He gazed at her longingly.

"You _don't_ see," He whispered, his eyes boring into hers without blinking.

What was happening here? She wondered fearfully. Why was he looking at her like…_that_…after he just said-

"Sheldon-…"

"Amy…please…listen to me. _Hear_ me. I want… I want…" He choked, forcing himself to admit the unthinkable.

'_Say it, Cooper. Man up and SAY it.'_

"What is it, Sheldon? What do you want?" She whispered, barely audible. Sheldon rushed out the words so fast that he could barely comprehend them as they were coming out of his mouth. It was like someone else was saying them. And yet, nothing else felt so right.

"When we're finally at that place, where we can be…intimate…I want it to be special. I want to make love to you." He sighed, his thumbs caressing her cheeks lovingly. Amy lost her breath.

"W-What?" She gasped, the roller coaster she was on suddenly dipping sharply and spinning her out of control. Sheldon's eyes filled with tears as they gazed unwaveringly into hers.

"I don't want to perform some meaningless, clinical experiment with you. I don't want it reduced to some cheap, mechanical gesture in the name of Science. I know what that means; I know what it will mean for _us_. It will change everything. Forever. I want to give you all of myself. And I want everything of you, in return. I don't want _sex_, Amy. I don't want _coitus_. I want…you. I want to make love to_ you_."

The feeling in Sheldon's voice shook Amy to the core. She closed her eyes against the onslaught of emotions coursing through her. Oh, my god…she thought, the tears she'd held at bay racing down her cheeks now. His fingers swiped them away gently.

"Please, Amy. Don't cry. I know I made a mess of things, and I don't blame you if you never forgive me. I just wanted you to know. You deserve nothing but the absolute truth. And I'm so sorry I denied it to you for so long. I'll leave you alone now if that's what you want," He said quietly, but Amy grabbed his shoulders, refusing to release him.

"Don't…don't you dare," She hiccupped, pulling him into her and crushing him in a hug that stole his breath. They clung to each other, crying quietly, releasing four years of pent up tension, love, and longing.

"Please…don't leave me," He whimpered.

Amy cried harder. As if that would ever happen. She would have greater success holding the ocean back with a broom.

"I won't Sheldon," She promised, holding him tighter.

"I need you Amy. I _need_ you. And I've never needed anyone. I know I'm not ready for this, but I will be… soon. I promise." He swore, the conviction in his voice strong. Amy didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

"I need you, too." She said thickly through her tears, overwhelmed. "We're in no rush, Sheldon. We have all the time in the world to get used to these feelings," She whispered.

Sheldon sniffled, tightening his grip on her in turn.

"I don't _want_ to get used to them. I like how this feels; like every time I touch you it's like the first time," He admitted shakily, the truth flowing out of him like it was the most natural thing on Earth.

Sheldon turned his head into the side of her neck, inhaling her delicious scent. She was life, and beauty, and everything that was pure in the Universe.

His lips began to burn a trail across her tender flesh, leaning into her until she fell backwards on the couch with his body covering hers. His lips at once sought hers out, the touch electrifying as they met. Sheldon let out a loud moan as Amy sucked his lower lip into her mouth, running her tongue along it slowly.

"Oh, Amy…" He murmured, cradling her head in his palms and running his fingers through her hair tenderly.

Amy felt like she was floating down a lazy river, her body being dragged by the current into a realm of peace and tranquility. The softness of Sheldon's lips as they moved over hers with sensual precision. The scent of him, which spoke of home. The feel of him, his hard muscles against her softer ones. It was too much. _He_ was too much. She needed air, and so did he, she realized, when he pulled away from her and began to pant. He tried to catch his breath. Amy sat up, leaning back against the cushions limply.

"I…I'm sorry. I don't…know what came over me." He tried, closing his eyes and biting his lips. Amy smiled a feminine smile as she stared unabashed at her dear Sheldon.

"I do," She said slyly, beaming when he turned his blue gaze on her full force. She had to giggle a little at the turn of events.

Sheldon leaned in to Amy again, this time brushing his lips against her ear. Amy shivered violently as his warm breath tickled her.

"Is this what you meant by claiming you?" He asked her quietly, and Amy chuckled.

"Um…sort of. Yes."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes at her.

"Um? You have one of the greatest minds of our generation and the most articulate thing you can say is Um?"

Amy smiled sweetly.

"What can I say, Dr. Cooper? You have that effect on me."

Sheldon's derision vanished, and he gazed at Amy like he'd never seen her before.

"I really _am_ sorry, Amy." He said remorsefully.

"I know, Sheldon. I know." She answered, warmth and forgiveness in her voice. Sheldon swallowed and nodded.

They sat in silence for a moment, each trying to gather their wits and hold their passion at bay. Finally Amy gently took hold of Sheldon's hand, and he let her, tightening his grip.

"Would you like me to drive you home?" She asked, comfortingly. He smiled at his wonderful girlfriend. She never pushed him. Never made him do anything he wasn't ready to do. He fell in love with her a little more.

"No, Amy. It's late. I want you to get some rest. I'll be fine." He said gently, rising from the couch and walking to the door. Amy followed him, looking up at him lovingly when he turned around. He stared at her for endless moments, not sure of what to say.

"Amy…" He whispered, but she stood on her tiptoes and placed a gentle kiss upon his lips. He gaped at her, at a loss. How did he ever find her? He would never, ever understand it.

"It's alright, Sheldon. You don't have to say anything. I know."

Looking through her, seeing her soul…he knew as well.

She really _was_ the key to his happiness.

A/N- Thank you for reading. Our favorite couple is moving into a place neither have been before. Can you feel the love? I can feel the love. :)


	20. Chapter 20

~Chapter 20~

A/N- My heart is full from the love you've shown me. Thank you so much. You are all too wonderful. I think it's safe to assume Sheldon and Amy are growing closer? A few chapters of lighthearted goodness are coming your way.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I've been meaning to tell you… I've got this feeling that won't subside. I look at you and I fantasize you're mine tonight. Now I've got you in my sights with these hungry eyes- one look at you and I can't disguise I've got hungry eyes- I feel the magic between you and I…" Eric Carmen – Hungry Eyes

The rest of the weekend breezed by. On Saturday, the girls went to the movies, while the guys stayed in and had a battle royale on X Box. As the ladies left 4A after saying good bye to their mates, Amy turned in the doorway just in time to see Sheldon squeal with glee as he made a wicked good move in Halo. He looked up and met her eyes, smiling shyly. Her heart pulsed with joy at seeing the man she loved so happy.

She no longer thought it childish for him to enjoy video games, comics, or cosplay. These things were dear to him, and they made him who he was- The man she'd fallen in love with. Things were finally getting back to normal.

Scratch that. Things were getting _so_ _much better_.

He texted her once during their evening apart, and Amy ignored it until the movie was over and she could escape to the ladies room to read it. She read it three times, each time smiling wider as she imagined his soft, mesmerizing voice.

'_I miss you. Miss you! Even though you only left my apartment two hours ago. So, as a result… I will now google hippy communes so I know where my future home will be.'_

"Oh, Sheldon…" She whispered, biting her lip. His sweet vulnerability was making her crazy. She went to sit down on the plush bench by the door, waiting for the girl's to finish in the ladies room. Tapping out a reply, she found her heart pounding. He wasn't even here, and he was affecting her.

'_I miss you, too. But you're not going anywhere without me.'_

Penny emerged from a stall, looking at Amy in the mirror as she washed her hands.

'_I wouldn't dream of it, Dr. Fowler.'_

Amy closed her eyes, drinking in the love she could feel through her I Phone.

"You've got it bad, girl. " Penny teased, shaking her head when Amy looked up and met her eyes in the mirror.

"What?" She questioned, distracted, but Penny shook her head as Amy threw her phone in her purse.

"Oh, nothing…" She said sweetly, as they exited side by side. Amy rolled her eyes.

The rest of the night, she endured relentless teasing from Penny and Bernadette over Her and Sheldon's behavior as of late. It was in good natured fun, though, so Amy wasn't upset.

That was, until her mother came to visit her on Sunday.

Her relationship with her mother was improving, especially after the fact she almost died. But there were still aspects of it that would stay the same.

Primarily, the way her mother still treated her like a child. Amy had hoped she wouldn't pressure her on the Cassidy issue, but no such luck was forthcoming.

"Amy, the entire family will be there. You cannot just bow out. What will everyone say?" Mrs. Fowler asked, her usual disappointment clear in her voice.

Amy crossed her arms and glared at her mother.

"I don't really care what they say, Mother. I was recently very ill. I didn't see the family beating a path to my hospital room to check on my well-being except for you. And of course, my friends and Sheldon."

Mrs. Fowler smiled fondly at the mention of her daughter's boyfriend.

"Oh, yes. Sheldon. You simply must invite him to come with you. I can't wait to show off what a handsome, intelligent boyfriend my daughter has landed," She gushed like a school girl. Amy narrowed her eyes at her mother's strange behavior.

"Since when do you sing such high praises for Sheldon?" She asked, dumbfounded. Mrs. Fowler merely smiled gently.

"Amy…that man loves you very much. He was devastated while you were ill. Is it a crime for me to be happy that my youngest daughter has found such a charming young man in which to love?"

Amy deliberated. She supposed her mother had a point.

"Well, I'm happy that your estimation of Sheldon has improved. Although I doubt very much he would want to be subjected to a wedding. It's not his thing," Amy said seriously,

"Well, it can't hurt to ask.

Amy blew out a deep breath, sounding aggravated.

"Perhaps I don't want to go, Mother. Cassidy was a monster to me growing up. I really don't care one inch to see walk down the aisle with her flavor of the week. Their marriage won't last, anyway. No good man worth his salt can put up with her for very long," Amy said bitterly. Her mother sent her a disapproving look.

"Amy, dear…that is not nice. Cassidy doesn't have your intelligence. The only thing she has going for her are her looks."

For some reason, that statement insulted Amy. Was her mother implying that with Amy, it was the opposite? All brains and _NO_ looks?" Deciding she didn't care anyway, Amy went to the kitchen for a bottle of water.

"Your sister Charlotte will be there. She is bringing Joseph and the children. Won't it be nice to at least see them?" She nudged, trying to sweeten the pot. Amy wasn't having it.

"Mother…why does it matter to you so much that I attend this wedding?"

Mrs. Fowler sat back and let out a heavy sigh.

"Amy…you are my daughter, and part of this family. Since your father died, you don't visit me unless I either beg you, or force you. My baby sister's daughter is getting married. It's the least we can do to be there for her. You love your Aunt, right?" She asked, and Amy felt resentment at being manipulated.

"Yes, mother. I love Aunt Jeannie. But her daughter, I can live without."

Mrs. Fowler nodded.

"I understand, Dear. I do. I know how cruel Cassidy was to you growing up. To be honest, I thought maybe you would like to show off a bit. You've blossomed into a lovely woman, Amy. You are a highly respected Neuroscientist, and you have a wonderful boyfriend. You have nothing to feel insecure about."

Amy realized that her mother was right. Why would she hide away from Cassidy, only adding fuel to the fire? She was not the scared little girl she was then. It was time Cassidy saw that. Still, she couldn't bring herself to commit to going. Especially if she were going alone.

"Whatever. I make no promises. If I can come, I will." She said with finality.

Mrs. Fowler smiled lovingly at her daughter, taking her hand.

"I want you to be proud of yourself, Sweetheart. Because_ I_ am proud of you. I don't want you feeling like you are less than anybody. That little snoot should be taught a lesson."

Amy chuckled at the venom in her mother's voice.

"I thought she is your favorite sister's daughter?" She said sarcastically. Mrs. Fowler rolled her eyes.

"She is. And I love my niece. But I love you more. And if she tries to insult you or belittle you in any way, I will take her over my knee myself."

Amy smiled, shaking her head.

"I'll think about it, Mother. I promise."

Mrs. Fowler left shortly after, giving her daughter a hug. Amy sat on the couch, hating the fact that once again, she was dreading asking Sheldon to accompany her to a family function. She wondered if perhaps this time, he would be more open to it.

Mrs. Fowler was right. It couldn't hurt to ask.

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By Wednesday, Sheldon's good mood had continued, even though he hadn't seen Amy in three days. They skyped each night before bed, although tonight she wasn't available for chatting. Sheldon figured she was busy with work and would text him later.

Her project at work had come on full force. She had spent the last three days inundated with research. Sheldon was so proud of her. His mind drifted to her throughout the day, and every time he pictured her winning a Nobel for her efforts, he would get choked up. He often pondered what that would mean for them. The thought of her being awarded the highest honor for Science made him feel strange things in his stomach.

Pride, of course. Admiration. And something else…something that made him hot all over, as though he just opened the oven door and the heat hit him full blast. Funny enough, it was a _good_ heat. It made him tingle all over and left him dizzy.

Since it was Wednesday, comic book night, Sheldon had been in his room sorting out his new purchases. He came back to the living room to find Bernadette and Penny in the kitchen. Leonard and Howard had left to pick up dinner for all of them.

"Hello, ladies," Sheldon said, making his way to the fridge for a drink. Penny and Bernadette sat at the island, whispering amongst themselves. They spared him a glance, both looking apprehensive.

"Have you heard from Amy today?" Penny asked him, catching Sheldon's attention. He turned around quickly at the concern in Penny's voice.

"No, I haven't heard from her yet. Work is keeping her very busy, the poor kid. She won't be joining us tonight."

Penny pursed her lips, nodding. Sheldon stared at her inquisitively. She looked like she had something on her mind.

"Am I missing something, here?" He asked in trepidation, his eyes darting between the two women. It wasn't often he picked up on the subtle nuances of people's behavior, yet something seemed out of place.

"Maybe we should tell him," Bernadette intoned, and Penny gave her a stern look.

"Bernadette, we promised Amy," She said in a chiding tone. Bernie shook her head sadly.

"I know, Penny. But it's almost here, and she hasn't said anything yet. Sheldon should know."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes at the two blondes.

"If this concerns my girlfriend, then yes. You _must_ tell me," He said firmly. "What's almost here?"

Penny sighed heavily.

"Sheldon…Amy has been upset for weeks about something. Her mother asked her attend Amy's cousin's wedding this weekend, and she doesn't want to go. This woman was pretty horrible to Amy growing up."

_Wedding? _

"What? But…why didn't she tell me? I didn't even know she had a cousin who lived here."

Penny shrugged.

"Apparently this woman, Cassidy, bullied Amy. She tried to get out of going, but Mrs. Fowler is insisting she come. Amy is worried it will stir up unpleasant memories."

Sheldon stared at Penny, his confusion morphing into anger.

"Why would she want to subject Amy to that kind of discomfort? Amy is a grown woman now. She can just tell her mother no," Sheldon said dryly. Penny jumped off the stool and came up to him, poking him in the chest.

"Or…her boyfriend could take her."

Sheldon put down his drink, looking at Penny like she sprouted another head.

"Oh…I was afraid you were going to suggest that." He said meekly.

Penny raised an eyebrow at her friend in challenge.

"Listen, Sheldon. You _are_ going to take your girlfriend to that horrible wedding. And do you know why? Because Amy would do it for you."

All at once, Sheldon felt smothered. A wedding? Good grief.

"But…I don't want to go to a family wedding. There will be strangers trying to shake my hand. Or hug me. And I will have to make small talk about mundane topics I know nothing about. And there will be strange food and I don't know who the caterer is. What if-…"

It was Bernadette's turn to hop off the stool. This called for a less subtle approach. She grabbed his collar firmly.

"Hey! Narcissus! Copernicus called and confirmed you are _not_ the center of the Universe. Suck it up, or so help me Sheldon…" She trailed off, her nostrils flaring wildly. Sheldon actually gulped. She released his collar, coming to her senses. Sheldon took a step back, still weary.

"What is _wrong_ with you? You are like a fairy hopped up on drugs," He complained, rubbing his neck where Bernie grabbed him. Penny pulled him aside, trying to reason with him.

"Listen, Sheldon. In all seriousness, Amy needs you there by her side. Your freaking out is precisely why she probably didn't mention it to you. She knows how you would react. You said you weren't going to take Amy for granted again. Please…don't let her down on this."

Penny's sad tone upset Sheldon. She was right.

Sheldon thought about what this meant. And what it would mean to Amy. He supposed it would be nice for her to show off the man in her life to her family, even though the prospect of that made Sheldon want to crawl under his bed. Weddings meant dressing up, dancing, and worst of all…socializing with strangers. Sheldon cringed at the thought of having to shake countless hands and enduring hugs from the female members of Amy's family. And yet, the prospect of letting Amy down made his heart physically hurt. He swore he wouldn't let her down again. She asked so little in their relationship, it was the least he could do for her. And he did promise her that he was trying to move their intimacy along. Constantly disappointing her down wasn't going to do it.

He gave Penny a humble look, thoroughly chastised.

"I didn't say I _wouldn't_ go. I just said I didn't _want_ to go. You didn't have to unleash Tinkerbell over here on me," He said in annoyance, glaring at Bernadette. She glared back, but wisely kept calm. Resolutely, he walked over to his messenger bag, retrieving his wallet and routing around inside.

"Penny, here. Take this."

Penny stared at him in confusion when he handed her an American Express card.

"What is this for, Sheldon?"

"Do me a favor. Take Amy shopping, and get her a suitable dress that she likes. Maybe buy her some of that face paint you ladies love so much. And take her to get her hair done if she wants. You know…something to help her feel good about herself. Could you do that for me?" He asked, the tenderness in his voice touching her. Her mouth dropped open as she stared at him.

"Sheldon…what if Amy protests? She may not like the idea of you just buying her all of that."

He pursed his lips, weighing his words carefully.

"I want her to feel good about herself. I think she looks lovely the way she is, but if getting dressed up for this wedding will help her feel more outwardly confident, than I guess I can live with that. Money is no object. Whatever she needs, buy it. Please?"

Penny eyed him with affection. It was obvious Sheldon was truly changing for the better. Gone was the selfish cry baby she had first met. In his place stood a man who was trying to be the man his girlfriend needed.

"It might cost a bit, Sheldon. How much do you-…"

Sheldon held up his hand to stop her rant.

"No object," He repeated firmly.

Penny nodded, glancing over to Bernadette who was staring at Sheldon with admiration.

"Sure thing, Sweetie. Good for you."

"I will speak to Amy about this myself. Please, do not mention anything," He asked, and both ladies nodded. "Thank you. And thank you for telling me. Even though this one didn't have to dislocate my neck," Sheldon huffed, staring at Bernadette like she was a drill sergeant.

"Oh stop it, you big crybaby." She shrieked, rolling her eyes.

Sheldon took his bottle of tea and walked back to his bedroom. He didn't release the breath he held until he was safely on the other side of the door.

A wedding. Okay…he could do this. He promised that he would take a more active role in Amy's life when it came to her family. It was time he made good on that promise.

_Oh, boy_…he thought. _What have I gotten myself into?_

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The next evening, after a stressful day of research and lab work, Amy walked up to the fourth floor of Los Robles with a heavy heart. She wanted nothing more than to turn back around and go home, retreating to her safe apartment. But it was date night, and Sheldon called her to say he wanted to discuss an important matter with her before they went to dinner.

She didn't like the sound of that at all. She took a deep breath as she knocked upon his door.

Leonard answered, smiling at her. She truly liked Leonard. He was a sweet person with a good heart. And the poor dear didn't have any problem wearing his heart on his sleeve. She returned his smile tentatively.

"Hi Amy. Come on in. Sheldon is in his room changing. He'll be out in a minute."

Amy put her purse down on the desk before walking to the sofa.

"Thank you, Leonard."

Her voice sounded frail and tired as she sat down, and Leonard furrowed his brows.

"Amy are you alright? Can I get you a drink?" He asked kindly, and Amy shook her head.

"No thank you. I'm fine. Just tired."

Leonard nodded, feeling bad for her. She didn't look to be in any mood to argue tonight. He hoped Sheldon would not upset her in any way.

"You're not overworking yourself, are you? We don't want you getting sick again."

The concern in Leonard's voice touched Amy.

"No, it's fine. I just have a lot on my mind."

Leonard smiled at her sweetly.

"Well, ok. I'm going to head out then. I'm meeting the guys for a movie. Are you sure you are alright?"

Amy smiled as best she could.

"You're a good friend, Leonard. Thank you."

Leonard retrieved his wallet and keys from the bowl, heading out the door.

"Have a good night," He said gently, closing the door behind him.

"Thank you. You as well."

She sat and waited for Sheldon, lost in thought. She didn't hear his approach from his bedroom. He stood on the threshold, watching her silently. She looked utterly dejected. Downcast eyes, slumped shoulders…a strange pain began in his chest, leading upward toward his temple as he stared at her. What on Earth was upsetting her so?

"Amy?" He whispered, like one would do to a hurt, frightened animal. Amy turned her head, meeting his gaze. She had been crying, that much was evident. Her green eyes were swollen beneath her glasses. The pain in his chest deepened.

"Hi, Sheldon. I'm sorry I didn't return your calls or texts today. I was busy and the day got away from me. Please don't be mad at me," She said, her voice catching. She rose from the couch, walking to him slowly.

"Mad at you? I'm not mad at you Amy. I was worried about you." He said gently.

Amy debated if she should prolong this torture. Maybe it was best to just get it over with.

"Sheldon, I know you wanted to talk to me before dinner. The truth is, I have to talk to you as well."

Her apprehensive voice made Sheldon wince.

"Alright, you go first." He said softly, and Amy steeled up her courage.

"Sheldon…my cousin Cassidy is getting married Saturday. She was…is…not a nice person. She bullied me throughout my childhood. My mother seems to think I should let bygones be bygones, and I am expected to attend the wedding. I don't want to go. And certainly not alone. I know that you hate weddings and I know that it's short notice-…"

"I'm going with you." He said soundly, stepping closer to her until they were chest to chest. Amy tilted her head up to meet his gaze, blinking at him.

"I'm sorry?" She whispered. Sheldon took her hand in his gently.

"I am accompanying you to the wedding. I am your boyfriend, she is your family, though unfortunate, and it is my place to be by your side. Period."

Amy gaped up at him, her mouth falling open.

"…What?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes, staring down at her in frustration.

"Good Lord, woman. Do I really need to repeat myself a third time? You and I are attending that wedding on Saturday. And I wish you would have told me sooner, Amy. It seems you have made yourself sick over this. Look at you," He chided her softly, shocking Amy by bending down on his haunches before her. Her eyes widened as he studied her face thoughtfully.

"You have been crying…your eyes are dark. Did you even sleep last night? I don't like the fact you spent an entire day upset, and didn't want to call me," He said, but his voice held no contempt, only worry. The tender way he was regarding her made her want to start crying all over again.

"I…was afraid to ask you. Afraid of your reaction. I know how much you despise weddings." She said honestly.

Sheldon bit his lip.

"Yes, I know. In the past I have been less than enthusiastic about such occasions. But Amy…I never want you to feel like you can't come to me. Especially when you are this upset. Why is your mother forcing this issue anyway if she knows how you feel?" He asked, annoyed at Mrs. Fowler for her upsetting his Amy so badly.

Amy frowned. "My mother thinks that we are adults now and should forget the past. She is right, of course. But Cassidy still thinks she is in 11th grade, and she is prom queen. She is a bit of a bitch."

Sheldon's eyes bugged out. He didn't think he had ever heard Amy curse before.

"Good Lord…you _are_ really upset. Even more reason for me to escort you. It's high time that that woman sees what a lovely, special woman you are Amy Farrah Fowler. I think we need to give her a taste of her own medicine." He said with arrogance, and despite her erratic emotions, Amy smiled.

"Oh, really. And how do you propose we do that?"

Sheldon led her to the couch, sitting close to her and taking her hand tenderly in his. Amy could only stare at the action in wonder.

"I asked Penny to take you shopping and to help you get dressed for the wedding. I want you to shine, Amy. And I want you to feel like the belle of the ball. I gave her my credit card. I don't want you to argue with me about it. It's done. Please…let me do this for you." He said in supplication. Amy stared at him, speechless.

"Why, Sheldon?"

He gazed at her with affection.

"Because, Amy. You are my girlfriend. It is my job to make you happy. I haven't done a stellar job of it so far. That is going to change."

Simple words, so delightfully and beautifully given. Amy felt the tears begin anew, and turned her head so Sheldon wouldn't see. Yet saw he did, by the frustrated sigh he produced.

"Oh, dear…here come the waterworks." He said in exasperation.

But his hand tightened in hers, and she knew that he wasn't really upset. She cried silently for a few moments, gathering her thoughts, and Sheldon held fast to her hand.

"How did you find out?" She asked, already knowing the answer.

"Your two friends, Thelma and Louise. Did you know that Bernadette could probably break your neck with her bare hands?" He asked, real fear creeping into his voice. Amy had to smile at how he probably came to that conclusion.

"Thank you Sheldon," She whispered, and in answer he squeezed her hand.

They sat side by side on the couch, silently holding hands. After a while, Sheldon put his arm around Amy, pulling her into him gently.

He could get used to this, he thought, as Amy's head found its way to his shoulder.

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Two days later, Amy's bedroom looked like the MAC counter at Bloomingdales. Everywhere she looked, there was some piece of cosmetic littering every available surface.

Penny had brought over an arsenal of beauty items; curlers, dryers, straighteners, and makeup…the list went on and on. After pushing Amy into the bathroom, shoving a gigantic bath bomb into her hand and warning her not to get her hair wet, she ordered Amy to take a bath while she set up what Amy would later refer to as 'The Combat Zone.'

It felt nice to relax in the bathtub, and the bath bomb they purchased at Lush didn't hurt. The pink, fragrant water that smelled of fresh roses was intoxicating. Amy closed her eyes, trying to relax enough to center her thoughts on the night ahead.

She was going to that blasted wedding. Curses. But the saving grace would be having Sheldon on her arm. He made everything better simply by being there. With him at her side, she would try to endure the night as best she could.

Sheldon had completely shocked her Thursday night. She had thought for certain he would flat out refuse to escort her to the wedding. Not only did he steadfastly say they were going together, he did the unthinkable. He paid for her entire outfit she would wear. Amy felt terribly shy about accepting such a generous gift, even from Sheldon. She was perfectly happy to go the local outlet store and buy something off the rack. Yet when Penny showed up at her door on the next evening, brandishing an American Express card with Sheldon's name on it, she actually did a double take.

"So…don't be angry with Bernadette and me for telling him about the wedding, Amy. You were upset, and he _is_ your boyfriend. He should be the one taking you and protecting you," Penny said quietly, guilt obvious in her voice. Amy couldn't stay mad at Penny for long.

"I'm not…mad. I just didn't want to force Sheldon into an uncomfortable situation. And this is _way_ out of Sheldon's comfort zone.

Penny sat beside Amy, shooting her a smile.

"Come on, Ames…you _must_ know that Sheldon would do anything now to make you happy. You are beautiful the way you are. But why not make this witch eat her words? Let's go to the mall, and make you breathtaking. And _don't_ tell me the idea of playing a goddess for a night for Sheldon doesn't make you all giddy inside," Penny said slyly.

Amy smiled, still not sure about this.

"I don't know how to do this, Penny. I'm a little out of my depth here," She confessed, wringing her hands together. Penny could see how much this was upsetting her friend. What had that bitch _done_ to her?

So help her, she was going to make Amy into the most beautiful woman in Pasadena. They say never to upstage the bride at a wedding.

Who were _they_, anyway? And what the _hell_ did they know?

"I'm here to help you. Together, we'll come up with the perfect outfit. And we'll go to Aveeda and get your hair trimmed. Do you trust me?" She asked sweetly, and Amy had to laugh.

"Are you joking? You know I do, bestie."

Penny hopped off the couch, dragging Amy behind her.

"Let's get our asses moving, then. Mush!"

Coming back to reality, Amy remembered the ensuing evening. Penny had dragged her to shop after shop, when she finally found what she was looking for at BCBG Maxazria. After an hour of being a human pin cushion, they finally altered the gown to her exact fit, instructing her it would be ready by noon the next day. The spa was next, where they gave her a stylish cut with some gentle layers, and a deep conditioning treatment. Armed with three bags full of fashions and accessories, by the time she arrived home she was exhausted. But gaping at the gown that hung in her closet, she had to admit…she was starting to feel a little better.

Amy only hoped that this wasn't an exercise in pain for her. Taking a deep breath, she lay back in the tub and closed her eyes.

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Sheldon paced his office, his gaze focused steadily on his whiteboard. A difficult differential equation had been teasing the back of his mind all week. Last night he tried to get some sleep but the numbers would not stop coming. Throwing off his duvet, he showered, dressed, and took the bus to Caltech at 7 am. He'd been there ever since.

Except of course, for that two hour block where he headed to Sax Fifth Avenue.

He stared at the board, adding and erasing numbers. But nothing seemed to balance. He couldn't focus on anything today. Perhaps it was his upcoming evening with Amy.

Perhaps it was that wardrobe bag hanging on the door hook, the one from Armani.

Sheldon Cooper had never been to Saks in his life. He felt foolish even walking through the door. Yet the salesman who waited on him was quite pleased, oohing and aahing and saying how tall and perfect he was. He had a suit and alterations within the hour.

Sheldon rolled his eyes, letting out a huge puff of air. Would Amy like the suit he chose?

This was madness. Utter madness. Why did he care about what Amy thought of his suit? Why did he spend five hundred dollars on it, along with a pair of dress shoes? Granted, the suit was sharp. Walking out of the dressing room, pinned with safety pins, he couldn't believe his eyes when he spied himself in the four way mirror. His back looked straighter, his shoulders broader, his legs longer, and his biceps…who the hell was this person? The tailor came up to him, smiling smugly.

"Do you see what I mean, Sir? I told you. Your lady will be all over you," He said slyly, to which Sheldon gulped.

_All over him? Dear Lord…._

While usually preoccupied with good grooming and hygiene, Sheldon wasn't normally bothered about his 'sex appeal'. The suit, however, took on a life of its own.

Sheldon had quickly paid and sat waiting for the alterations before he could change his mind. For some deep, dark reason, he knew the truth of his purchase. He _wanted_ Amy to find him attractive. He knew she already did, but he wanted her to see that he was trying, for her, to be the suitor and the man she needed. The last thing he wanted to do was embarrass her by showing up to her cousins wedding wearing his flash t-shirt. No matter how stylish and classic that was.

Now, five hours later, Sheldon still could not solve this puzzle. All his mind could seem to do was wander to Amy; what was she doing? What did Penny help her buy? How would she look?

The fact he was even wondering about this was lunacy. Whatever she wore, she would look good. He sat down in his chair, staring into space.

She normally looked _more_ than good to him. He found no fault with her appearance; perhaps she dressed a bit old fashioned, but that was part of her charm. She didn't need to blend into the crowd. She walked to the beat of her own drum, wearing what she felt comfortable in. One thing he adored about her was how down to earth she was. And yet, part of him couldn't lie – he was more than curious to see how she would look tonight.

Penny had come home late last night from Amy's, handing Sheldon a few receipts. He had given them a cursory glance, noting before shoving them in his desk drawer names like BCBG something or other, and Jimmy Choo. He idly wondered if Jimmy Choo sold cardigans. Penny assured him they spent as little as possible, but Sheldon waved her off offering a dismissive _'It's fine'_. He only hoped that Amy was pleased with her purchases.

Swiveling around, Sheldon knew it was time to head home and get ready. It was well past three, and he was to be at Amy's at five sharp. He debated calling Leonard to come get him, then decided to take the bus. The walk would do him good; perhaps help him clear his head. He grabbed his messenger bag, then the suit, turning and giving his board one last look.

"Nothing happens until something moves," He murmured, quoting Einstein. Flicking off the light switch, Sheldon left without another thought to Wave Particle Duality or Quantum Physics.

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Penny stood back, surveying her handy work. She was absolutely amazed at the result. It wasn't that she didn't deem Amy to be beautiful. She was, no doubt, in her own wholesome way. But a smoky eye and defined cheekbones, coupled with some lip definition, and Penny had to admit it.

Amy was quite the hottie.

Penny put the finishing touches on Amy's hair, admiring the way the curls flowed through her long mane.

'_So this is what lay under all of those layers of wool_,' Penny thought smugly.

She smirked to herself as she imagined Sheldon seeing her like this for the first time. It was about time that pragmatic Physicist was knocked on his ass.

While clear to everyone how Sheldon's attitude had changed since meeting Amy, he himself was having difficulty coming to terms with it. Penny hoped that seeing Amy looking so beautiful would give Sheldon the jolt he needed to show Amy more attention. If Amy looked like this every day, Sheldon would have quite the fight on his hands against other suitors. She smiled at Amy as she began gathering her tools and packing them up.

"You look fantastic, Amy. I can't wait for you to see yourself."

Bernadette had arrived, calling out to the girls.

"In the bedroom," Penny yelled, and when Bernie walked in and her eyes landed on Amy, she gasped.

"Oh my goodness Amy, you look incredible." She gushed.

Amy, however, was feeling less than incredible. She was worried that this was a mistake, and that when Sheldon arrived_ he_ would think it was a mistake, and when he saw her he would _know_ it was a mistake. Her nerves were frazzled. She wasn't opposed to dressing up, but she knew how much Sheldon hated change. Maybe he would think she looked horrible.

Or an even darker scenario played itself out in her head: that Sheldon would take one look at her, and simply be indifferent. As if spending hundreds of dollars and hours of preparation did not matter, and she might have well have worn her loafers and a cardigan.

Penny smiled at her gently, trying to dispel her nerves.

"Hey…I know what you're thinking, and you couldn't be more wrong. Sheldon will love it. I promise. I know how men think, Sweetie. And no man can resist the woman they care about when they are dressed to the nines. I know we are talking about Sheldon here, but he is still a man under all of that…hardware."

Amy had to laugh at that. She appreciated Penny's words, but still felt slightly nervous.

"I suppose. I'm just afraid it won't matter. To him, or Cassidy. I was never good enough to be in her presence growing up. I don't want to embarrass myself tonight. Especially with Sheldon there."

Bernadette came and sat on the bed, folding her knee underneath her.

"Amy, just put your game face on, and don't let her win. You are a beautiful, highly intelligent woman who has a large circle of friends, a boyfriend who adores you, and a wonderful career. You have nothing to be embarrassed of. Give her hell. Her wedding day, or not."

Amy smiled, shaking her head.

"Thank you, guys. What would I do without you?"

Penny winked at her, and took her hand.

"Are you ready to see yourself?" She asked, the anticipation killing her. Amy took a deep breath, closing her eyes.

"Yes."

Penny guided her to the mirror on the dresser.

"Open up, Ames."

Who _was_ this?

The room was silent as both Penny and Bernadette watched Amy stare at herself. The minutes stretched on, Amy not moving, the only sign of life her eyelashes which fluttered at intervals.

"Well?" Penny asked cautiously, fearing Amy hated it. "Say something," She whispered, holding her breath.

"Oh…my God," Was all Amy could manage. Penny figured that was good enough.

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Bernadette and Penny popped out into the hall, just as Sheldon strode up to Amy's door. Penny wolf whistled and Bernie fanned herself as they stared at him, utterly astonished.

They had seen Sheldon dressed up before, most recently at prom. But he looked so different now. He was wearing a dark grey suit which was obviously tailored. This suit fit him like a second skin, and Penny giggled like a schoolgirl. Were those…muscles he had in his arms? He sported a light aqua shirt which brought out the blue in his eyes, but the standout piece of the ensemble was a cobalt blue bow tie at his neck.

"Oooohhh," They both hummed, surrounding him like a wolf circling their prey.

Sheldon stood like a mannequin while the ladies admired him. Women and their hormones, he thought in displeasure.

"Wow, Sheldon… you clean up rather nicely," Bernadette said, earning a blush from him.

He supposed he looked presentable. This suit cost a small fortune, after all. But underneath it all, he was still Sheldon Cooper.

Why did that irk him suddenly?

He glared at the two women in mock anger.

"Get a hold of yourselves and put a lid upon your estrogen. I look the way I always look," He snarked, balancing back and forth on his wingtip shoes.

The ladies exchanged a glance, smiling widely.

"Well if by that you mean edible, then…nope. Sorry to tell you, but you don't," Penny said, punching him on the arm good naturedly.

Sheldon stared at her like a deer caught in a tractor's headlights.

"Edible? What are you talking about? I don't get it," He stammered in confusion.

Penny smacked her lips together. "Don't worry. Dressed like _that_, you will."

She turned on her heels, dragging her gear behind her with Bernadette in tow.

"Have fun tonight, Sheldon. And don't do anything we wouldn't do," They said in unison. Sheldon nearly choked on his breath.

He stared at Amy's door. He could do this. He could do this. He could do this.

I can't do this, he decided, turning on his heel. And then, something made him stop.

An image of Amy, walking through a vineyard snacking on grapes.

The memory of seeing her sitting in her hospital bed, gazing at him with relief and love.

The way she kissed him.

The way she smiled at him.

The way she listened to him.

The way she didn't mock him or laugh at him.

The way she knew that he would let her down, but still she waited patiently.

Suddenly, Sheldon turned back toward the door with renewed determination. She was his girlfriend, she needed him, and he would do this, dammit. He would do this for her, because she would do it for him. He raised his hand to rap on the door, delivering his customary three knocks. The door swung open and Sheldon nearly fell over. His eyes widened in bewilderment, tilting his head to the side as his vision took her in.

It was his Amy, only different. Her long hair was styled in big soft curls that cascaded down her back, and across her bosom, held to the side by a large crystal like clip. Her glasses were gone, and he'd never seen her eyes look so green before. Long lush eyelashes framed her orbs, lending her an elfin look. Maybe it was the subtle eyeliner that extended outward like a cat.

And her mouth…deep ruby lips that looked plush and inviting.

Sheldon blinked rapidly, feeling his chest tightening. If all this wasn't enough, there was the issue of her attire.

She wore a deep emerald gown made of some satiny material, with a sheer bust line that molded to her breasts in the most tantalizing way. It was the most skin he'd ever seen on his girlfriend. The dress hugged her curves at her waist and hips, outlining her womanly figure, and falling just above her knees. His eyes strayed all the way down to her feet, widening at the satin green open toed stilettos on her petite feet.

'_Oh, Dear…'_ He thought numbly, completely out of his depth. Finally, after an eternity, his eyes met hers.

Amy Farrah Fowler was quite simply, a vision. He couldn't utter a single word, a solitary sound. Nothing would come out of his usually pedantic mouth. She literally rendered him speechless.

In all of his life, no woman had ever stirred him the way Amy did. He fell in love with her intellect first. Then her heart. And lastly, her beauty. But this…she looked too beautiful to be real.

Amy stood immobile, her eyes boring into Sheldon's, before she allowed herself to peruse his body in return. She was equally moved by how handsome he looked.

One of the things she found so attractive on her boyfriend was his lanky height, his firm bone structure. He towered over her in a suit that fit him like a glove. So accustomed to seeing him in khaki's and t-shirts, she was utterly astounded to see him looking like he stepped off the pages of GQ. She felt a stirring in her belly as she watched Sheldon's eyes linger on her, caressing her like warm honey.

Then something amazing happened. The ever brilliant Physicist spoke, and the only word that escaped was simply,

"Wow."

Amy smiled a slow smile.

"Wow? You have one of the greatest minds of our generation, and the most articulate thing you can say is wow?" She mocked him playfully, repeating his own words back to him.

_Vixen._

"You…you look…radiant." He stuttered, trying to swallow down the saliva that suddenly pooled in his mouth.

Amy's immediate blush and the way she bit her lip gave him a funny feeling in his chest. Of course, _radiant_ was an understatement. While Sheldon knew his girlfriend was attractive, he never allowed himself to dwell on that. At least for very long. But now…

There was no denying the fact that underneath Amy's girlish modesty lay a ravishing woman. He shuddered when he imagined if characters like Kripke could see her dressed this way, and what _their_ reaction would be.

No. That would simply not do.

"Sheldon, you look amazing. You look…" She trailed off, her green eyes burning a trail from his eyes to his toes. Sheldon squirmed under the scrutiny, feeling his blood pressure rise.

"I look?" He questioned, trying to figure out that look in her eye. Amy swallowed before she took a step closer to him.

"Honesty, right?" She whispered, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. Sheldon nodded slowly, his eyes never leaving hers.

"You look sexy. _Very_ sexy."

Amy's husky voice touched him like a caress.

She was going to kill him. He could see that now.

Sheldon cleared his throat. _Sexy_. Well…that was…good, right?

_Good_? Who the hell was he kidding? The fact she found him sexy did things to him that he did not want to face. Sheldon stepped forward and offered her his arm.

"Shall we?" He asked softly, and Amy stepped out, locking the door. Upon turning around, Sheldon had another mini cardiac arrest.

Her dress was astonishing from the front. But from the back…

It dipped low on her neck, exposing her pale, soft skin. He closed his eyes to gather himself, opening them after a moment to see Amy looking at him with a worried look.

"Is everything okay," She asked dubiously, and Sheldon forced a smile.

"Never better."

They descended to the first floor, Sheldon trying to fight the urge to stare at her like a starving man. God…this was going to be a long night.

When they arrived outside, Amy made to head toward the parking lot attached to her building. But Sheldon steered her towards the direction of a shiny black car parked at the curb.

"This, Dr. Fowler, is our ride." He said proudly, taking her elbow gently as the driver opened the door for them.

Amy's eyes grew wide as she approached the beautiful vehicle.

"This is for us? Really, Sheldon?"

Sheldon smiled warmly at her.

"Yes. More accurately, for _you_. I want you to relax and enjoy your evening, Amy." He said with such tenderness, that Amy's heart turned over.

"Thank you. For all of this, Sheldon." She said in awe, her beautiful face shining with happiness.

Her bright smile was all the thanks he needed.

"You're welcome, Amy."

Guiding her inside the limo, Sheldon relaxed marginally. He could do this. He _could_.

He just had to overlook the fact she was Aphrodite incarnate.

A/N- A few things – We don't have much family backstory on Amy. I embellished a bit for the purpose of creating a picture of her family. Her deceased father, sister, and cousin are all my own creation. Until such time as we are proven otherwise, I'd like to think that Amy has a loving sister. I'd also like to point out that I love Sheldon and Amy the way they are, dress and all. But as in real life, they will dress differently if the occasion calls for it. They are virgins in more ways than one; breaking out of their shells and comfort zones to experiment. Obviously, this wedding calls for bringing out the big guns. Next Chapter: One protective Dr. Cooper coming up.


	21. Chapter 21

~Chapter 21~

A/N- Thank you so much for each and every review. I answer them all, because your enjoyment and love of this story is what gives it life. All of YOU contribute to their love story, as well, by inspiring me. Please forgive any typos; I have the heart of a 10 year old, but the eyes of an 80 year old. :D So…Sheldon Cooper. Sheldon Cooper in a tailored suit, in a limo, at a wedding, and he's dancing…it's getting hot in here. I need a drink. Join me at the bar, my treat. Erika, (coolshamyshipper) this song's for you. :) Thank you for the inspiration. It's PERFECT for this chapter.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…You look so wonderful in your dress- I love your hair like that- The way it falls on the side of your neck- Down your shoulders and back-We are surrounded by all of these lies- And people who talk too much-You've got that kind of look in your eyes- As if no one knows anything but us…" Ed Sheeran - Tenerife Sea

The limo ride to the Church was an exercise in torture. Plain and simple.

Sheldon had endured dental exams that were less anxiety inducing. He tried to remain cool and calm, but he was failing. He draped one elbow on the door handle, the other on the seat between them, but that felt odd. He wasn't some gigolo. He tried folding his hands on his lap, but his hands felt clammy. Oh, dear…that won't work, either. He detested clammy hands, even his own. He felt awkward and out of place.

It didn't help that the Church was nearly across town, or that they had the poor luck of catching every red light.

Sheldon and Amy sat side by side, encased in buttery soft leather and luxury. While this vehicle was top of the line, he could care less about the plush interior. Sheldon could barely stop his eyes from drifting over to his girlfriend. She sat calmly, staring straight ahead as was her usual manner when she was reflective.

Why did she have this effect on him? She looked so lovely that he wasn't sure he could keep it together. He stole glances at her, entranced by the way her full lips opened and closed and she bit her lips thoughtfully. Or the way her long lashes fluttered as she blinked. Or the way her hair fell, just so, across her neck and down to her collarbones. He gulped thickly as his eyes roamed lower, staring spellbound at the way her shapely breasts curved into a smaller waist.

_Dear God_…he groaned inwardly, feeling like a sixteen year old school boy. No. That was an incorrect analogy. He_ never_ experienced these…desires…at sixteen. They were as new and frightening as they were exciting.

Everyone assumed he was oblivious to Amy and her attributes. He hid his feelings well for the most part. Yet as of late, they were becoming more and more impossible to hide. Seeing her dressed so perfectly, looking so _healthy_ and vital after the month they'd experienced…he wanted to say forget the wedding and just be alone with her.

Sheldon Cooper needed order. He needed structure. And he needed familiarity. Without it, he felt like a tumbleweed rolling across the Texas plains. He was quickly realizing that there was nothing about this evening that was remotely ordered, structured, or familiar.

And that threw his mind into a tailspin.

It wasn't that he blamed Amy for the fact he was here, or how the way she looked was making him react. It was simply the fact that Sheldon wasn't accustomed to dressing up, attending a wedding willingly, or feeling completely overwhelmed by Amy. Their relationship had always been easy and effortless; a romance of the minds. Suddenly, he is found himself imagining…scenarios. Wondering how the skin would feel on her bare shoulders. What her scent is like tonight at the pulse point at her throat. What sounds she would make if he were to place his lips there.

This was madness.

Amy, likewise, was having a hard enough time restraining herself. Seeing her boyfriend dressed so elegantly, his long legs stretched out across the floor of the limo, gave her mind free reign to roam. And roam it did…it was all she could do not to drape herself across him like a blanket and have her way with him right here, right now. The shy smiles he normally gave her were nowhere to be found tonight. He was staring at her like he was dying of thirst and she was the last drink on Earth.

Amy found herself squirming in her seat, trying to remain calm. He had been blatantly staring at her body, and she felt completely exposed. She would have originally thought he didn't like her look tonight, due to his stoic face, had it not been for the fact he couldn't keep his eyes off of her.

Maybe Penny was right, and he actually did like her dressed so… provocatively.

Well, for Amy, anyhow. Of course, anything above the knee was provocative for her.

Amy caught her breath as she turned in her seat and Sheldon's eyes met hers. He slid a tad closer to her, swallowing.

"Amy?" He said quietly, not sure what it was he was asking for. He licked his lips and Amy followed the motion with her eyes.

"Yes?" She managed, licking her own lips now as well. His gaze widened and swept down her body before closing his eyes. If she only knew the thoughts going through his mind right now…

"We've arrived, Sir." The driver interrupted on the intercom. Both Amy and Sheldon sat back as though they were teenagers caught kissing by the Principle.

"Thank you," He murmured, taking a deep breath. The car came to a stop, and Sheldon exited the car himself while the driver came to open the door for Amy.

"I will be waiting, Sir." He said cordially, and Sheldon nodded.

He felt strange taking Amy's hand to escort her inside; he'd never done such a thing before and didn't know how she would feel about it.

Sheldon collected himself, walking a pace behind Amy as they entered the church, and placed his hand on the small of her back. Amy froze, staring back at Sheldon with wide eyes. The gesture was devastatingly intimate, and as he maneuvered her a few steps out of the walkway to allow others to pass, he realized that his hand had slid lower than intended.

"Are you expected to find your mother, or to go greet your cousin?" He whispered, leaning his head down and staring into her eyes.

Amy found herself locked in Sheldon's gaze, not understanding why his benign question was having such an effect on her. Perhaps it was his voice, which had dropped an octave. Or the way his eyes were steadily focused on hers, attuned to her every move. Every coherent thought fled as she watched his gaze slide down to her mouth, then back to her eyes again, his long lashes batting innocently. He hadn't moved his palm yet, and the feel of it on her backside was making her grow lightheaded.

Did he not realize the effect he was having on her? Had _always_ had on her, from the first? Even when he was being impossible, narcissistic, childish, or petty, she spied something inside of him that made her love him in spite of it, perhaps because of it. He was such a youngling at heart and mind, never fully maturing in so many ways. Yet the way he was looking at her now, gave her every indication that he was fully and completely a man.

_Her _man.

Her body tingled as she inhaled his concentrated scent, so close to her. Her eyes zoned in on his Adam's apple, and she watched it bob when he swallowed.

"I…I'm not seeing Cassidy until the reception. I have no wish to fawn over her. And I'm sure my mother and sister are already seated. We can try to find them," She said quietly, and Sheldon nodded, once again steering her toward the front of the church. He knew Amy was nervous being here, and he resolved not to push her. Whatever she wanted tonight, she would get.

They walked towards the altar, an usher handing them a program and asking which side, bride or groom.

"Bride", Sheldon answered briskly, moving purposely down the aisle. Amy spotted her mother, sister, and brother- in- law. She nudged Sheldon that she'd found them, and he surprised her by taking her hand in his.

"It will be alright, Amy. I promise."

The confident and sweet way he said it put her mind at ease. She had no idea where this behavior was coming from, but she was grateful. She smiled softly at her boyfriend, as he led her into the pew.

Mrs. Fowler stood slightly to greet her daughter, her smile wide as Amy leaned in to hug her.

"Amy…I'm so glad you came. I just knew you would. And you look absolutely breathtaking," She gushed, her gaze moving past Amy to land on Sheldon. Her look was kind but Sheldon felt his stomach flutter. The last time they saw each other was at the hospital. It was a turning point in Sheldon's life. Their conversations opened his eyes to a great many things. That was why he was here with Amy today, at this wedding.

Sheldon waited until Amy was done with her greetings. He moved in towards Mrs. Fowler, taking her hand in his and laying a kiss on her knuckles worthy of Rhett Butler. He was raised in Texas, after all, and Southern gentlemanly values were instilled in him from the cradle.

"Good evening, Mrs. Fowler. It's lovely to see you again. Under decidedly better circumstances," He said, trying to import some humor into his statement. Amy's mother nodded, smiling serenely.

"Yes, Sheldon it is. Thank you. I'm glad you could come with Amy tonight. And you both look so wonderful," She said, admiring not only her daughter, but her handsome boyfriend's attire. He looked marvelous.

She was proud to show off her baby daughter the Neuroscientist, who so happened to have a brilliant Physicist for a boyfriend. For years the family had teased and taunted Amy. Mrs. Fowler was ecstatic that her daughter was finally coming into her own.

Amy waved at her sister Charlotte, who was seated on the other side of their mother. Charlotte flashed her a toothy grin, her eyes moving back and forth between Amy and Sheldon. She raised her brows flirtatiously and Amy shook her head, smirking. She could tell that her older sister was going to drive her nuts tonight trying to wheedle out of her the goods on Sheldon.

"Thank you for coming tonight, Dear. I know you didn't want to, but I'm glad that you did."

Amy turned to her mother, frowning.

"I'm only here for you, Mother. And Aunt Jeannie. Let's not make a big deal of this, shall we?"

Mrs. Fowler nodded. "Alright. It's just, Auntie Jeannie and I are so close. It's a shame our daughters aren't."

Sheldon sat still as a statue, his eyes roaming around the Church. His left knee kept brushing against Amy in a soothing manner. He tried not to eavesdrop on Amy and Mrs. Fowler's conversation, but with his Vulcan hearing, it was impossible.

"Yes, well…that is _not_ my fault. That ship sailed years ago, and my dignity was on it. But no more. I'm here to take it back."

Mrs. Fowler sighed, sadly.

"Amy, I know Cassidy has a lot to answer for. But perhaps, she is growing up. Maybe the both of you could forge a relationship now that you're older. She doesn't have any real friends," Mrs. Fowler said, hopefully, and Amy shot her a bitter look.

"Huh. Big shocker there. Absolutely not, Mother. I have no desire to forge anything with Cassidy. She is a bully, a snob, and the most callous person I've ever known. I'm through being her punching bag. I'm here to fulfill my family obligation, and then leave. Let's just get through this night, okay?" She whispered angrily, and Mrs. Fowler knew to drop the subject.

Sheldon's hands balled into fists as he absorbed this new information. He himself was no stranger to bullying; growing up in a state like Texas, where boys are taught to shoot guns at two and ride horses by three, his peers didn't take kindly to a boy genius who had no time for those pastimes. Regular taunts and beatings were a daily occurrence, but Sheldon learned to rise above it. He was also no stranger to being mistreated by his siblings. George Jr. and Missy were sometimes as cruel as their classmates.

Yet hearing that his Amy, his sweet, kind, beautiful Amy…was abused by her cousin and everyone ignored that fact enraged him.

Lost in his thoughts, Sheldon didn't even notice Amy's hand on top of his. He was startled out of his reverie and turned to look at her, noticing her concerned gaze.

"Sheldon, I was calling you for over thirty seconds. Are you alright?" She whispered, and he simply nodded.

"Yes, I'm fine. I was just…daydreaming."

Amy shot him a peculiar look. Sheldon Cooper, daydreaming?

He motioned to Amy with a nod in her mother's direction.

"Are _you_ alright?" He asked, his voice clouded with concern and tenderness. Amy smiled sadly, looking down.

"I'm fine," She whispered.

No other words were said as they waited for the ceremony to begin. Sheldon glanced around at the room full of strangers. Most of them looked happy and some looked bored. It was a strange feeling, being there to witness two people joining their lives in matrimony. For the majority of his life, the idea of marriage seemed pointless. He had assumed he would remain a bachelor forever. He needed no one. Or so he thought.

He had to admit, the strange feeling in his stomach gave him pause. So did the knocking of his heart when he looked over to the groom, already standing by the altar awaiting his bride. The poor fool looked terrified. He was no expert, but he assumed on One's wedding day, there would smiles and not frowns.

The wedding processional began to play, and one by one the maids were walked down the aisle by groomsmen to their respective places up front. Sheldon sat motionless as he took in the scene.

Wagner's 'Here Comes the Bride' began, and the guests rose to their feet. When the bride came into view, looking smug and beaming a megawatt smile that was too fake for Sheldon's taste, his lips curled in distaste. She looked overconfident and overly made up. This woman had nothing on his Amy. Amy, who was radiant without even trying. Amy, who had never hurt another soul in her life.

Amy, who deserved a day like this so much more than she did.

Sheldon's breath caught in this throat, and he gasped quietly. What the blazes was he thinking? All of this wedding nonsense was making him crazy. Resolving to stop thinking like a hippy, he shook off the strange feeling and stood upright. But when Amy tentatively touched his hand, he could no longer deny the feelings of affection bubbling up inside of him. He took her hand in his without looking at her. He promised her he would support her today. That was exactly what he was going to do.

The vows were typical of an Anglo Saxon ceremony. Love. Honor and Obey. Richer or poorer. Blah, blah, blah. No special vows, no meaningful professions of love. Sheldon was certain there was no pre-nuptials nor relationship agreement involved. He took one look at the hapless groom, actually feeling bad for him. He was marrying a wolf in sheep's clothing.

Whatever…it was his problem.

The ceremony ended, the guests rising and chatting amongst themselves. Mrs. Fowler excused herself, presumably to visit her sister. This left Amy and Sheldon alone with Charlotte and Joe.

"Come here, you little brainiac, you!" Charlotte said affectionately, embracing Amy in a gentle hug. Sheldon watched in amusement as Amy's sister patted her head.

"Are you alright now? You had us all worried sick, you know. I wanted to come out to California, but Joe was away on business and we had no one to watch the kids," She said sadly, her eyes taking in her sister with concern. Amy smiled.

"I'm fine. All better now, Charlotte. I was a model patient, only passing out the once. Of course, it lasted a week," She said in humor, but Charlotte didn't find it amusing.

"God, you scared me Amy. Please don't do that again." She said tenderly

Amy bit her lip and nodded. Charlotte's eyes strayed to Sheldon, and Amy decided introductions were in order.

"Charlotte, this is my boyfriend Dr. Sheldon Cooper. Sheldon, this is my older sister Charlotte and her husband Joe."

Sheldon smiled politely, nodding his head. Joe stepped up and held out his hand to Sheldon. Biting the bullet, he gripped Joe's hand firmly. Surprisingly, Sheldon didn't cringe.

"Nice to meet you, Sheldon. Char and I have heard a lot about you. You're a Physicist?" He asked Sheldon, impressed. Sheldon nodded.

"Yes. Theoretical. I work at Caltech University, the same as Amy."

Charlotte beamed in Sheldon's direction.

"So you're the one who has stolen my baby sister's heart," Charlotte said kindly, eyeing Sheldon up and down with admiration.

Sheldon didn't know how to respond to such a statement. They certainly knew more about him than he did about them. He looked at Amy, helplessly.

"Sheldon is one of the country's top leading Physicists working in the field. His previous field of study was String Theory. But he's since moved to Dark Matter." Amy said proudly.

Charlotte and Joe smiled, turning to each other.

"That is some resume, Dr. Cooper." Charlotte gushed, and Sheldon blushed.

"Sheldon, please." He said automatically, feeling more at ease. They were very nice people and Sheldon realized he had no reason to be so nervous.

The Church had emptied out, everyone moving on to head to the reception.

"I'm so glad you decided to come, Amy. And you look…whoa." Charlotte said, shaking her head back and forth.

"I promised Mother I would. Although the last thing I want to do is share in Cassidy's joy." She said angrily. Charlotte nodded.

"I know. I spoke with her this morning, and all she could do was complain about the caterer Auntie Jeannie hired. Never mind the fact my husband and I flew across the country for this. She hasn't changed one bit. Mother demanded we come, as well. At least we're here together. We have a lot of catching up to do. And I wanted to visit Great Aunt Flora."

Amy gave her sister a quick hug. "We'll see you at the reception, alright?"

Both Charlotte and Joe waved to them, ushering out their children who had fallen asleep. Amy turned to Sheldon to find him standing there, staring at her thoughtfully.

"Your sister and her husband seem nice." He said quietly. Amy agreed.

"Yes. They are very nice. I miss her very much. They live in Boston where Joe is an attorney."

This piqued Sheldon's interest.

"I never even knew until recently that you had a cousin, let alone a sister. Why didn't you ever discuss her with me; you're obviously very close." He said, his voice serious. Amy shrugged.

"I don't know, Sheldon. I guess…you never really asked me about my family. I could have volunteered the information, but you rarely seemed interested anytime I brought up a family issue. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to keep you in the dark."

Sheldon stared at Amy, at a loss. Once again, his failures as a boyfriend were glaringly obvious. That they were together for four years, and he had no idea she even had a sibling until Mrs. Fowler told him in the hospital grieved him. He resolved right then to fix this.

"I'm the one who is sorry, Amy. I should have listened to you more. I should have taken a greater interest in your life. From now on, I will. I promise."

His voice was so sincere, that Amy could hardly answer him. She smiled and nodded her head.

"Thank you, Sheldon."

He looked around the abandoned Church, coming back to his senses. "Shall we?" He asked, extending his arm again.

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Sheldon had to admit, the reception was lovely. Even though it was held at the Botanical Gardens and he was certain he would have an allergy attack by the end of the event.

The elegant colors of black and pink were everywhere, and little touches such as floating lanterns dotted the canopy above them, while flowers floated in the pool beside them.

He often wondered if such trappings were necessary. He supposed, having such surroundings on a special day only added to the memory of it. With his eidetic memory, though, it rarely mattered. He remembered every specific detail, down to the smallest spec.

For instance, he would always remember that tonight, Amy smelled of fresh cut roses. And that little blond highlights in her hair were being teased out by the soft lighting. He'd remember the way her straight teeth looked when she laughed at something her sister whispered to her, or how her soft cheekbone rose into an apple when her little niece sat on her lap and took a lock of Amy's hair in her chubby fingers. Each moment that passed, he found himself more and more entranced by Amy.

When did this happen? Was it when she fell ill, or had it been building before then? Surely, it must have. He could trace back his burgeoning feelings for her beginning to flourish ages ago. Yet it wasn't until their date in Santa Monica that he actually knew without a doubt that he was in love with her.

Yes, he loved her. And he'd told her as much on prom night. Finally admitting to her something he never thought he would. But it was more than that. So much more. He didn't just _love_ her. He was _in love_ with her. And almost losing Amy before he ever got a chance to express that nearly drove him over the edge. Sheldon wasn't used to needing people. He didn't like to admit he needed anything or anybody. It was becoming clearer to him each day how much Amy meant to him. The thought left him breathless.

"I'm going to take this little one to the bathroom. Be right back," Charlotte said, picking up her daughter gently. Amy watched them go, a wistful look on her face that had Sheldon tilting his head as he studied her.

He thought back to what Mrs. Fowler said in the cafeteria that morning they met in the hospital; about Amy maybe wanting marriage and children. Seeing her with her niece just now, he knew without a doubt she would make a wonderful mother. She was warm, gentle, and sweet. And she had the most brilliant mind he'd ever encountered. Any child would be lucky to have Amy for a mother.

Amy took a sip of her wine, staring around the gardens. She set her glass down, her eyes meeting Sheldon's.

"Are you ready to greet your cousin?" Sheldon asked her, tenderness apparent in his voice. Amy rolled her eyes. It seemed the time had come.

"I suppose. I can't put this off forever. Let's do this. But I can't promise anything; there is already a TSA agent out there who can attest to my wrath," She said, and Sheldon chuckled. Perhaps the second glass of wine he brought Amy earlier was a big mistake.

Together, Amy and Sheldon navigated the crowd to where Cassidy was standing, talking with the best man. At their approach, he excused himself and Sheldon stared after him a moment before turning his attention back to Cassidy.

Amy looked pale and withdrawn at the prospect of facing her cousin. She had been quiet upon seeing Cassidy walk down the aisle, and it had only worsened as the ceremony wore on. This would not do. He wanted Amy to prove to the snobby woman she had risen above whatever childish torment had been inflicted upon her.

Sheldon took her arm, in essence taking command, and guided her over to her newly married cousin.

"I won't let go of you," He promised, his hand sliding down to enfold her own. The warmth she found there calmed her.

"Okay," She whispered tightly.

The woman had the good grace to smile in Amy's direction, though it seemed forced. When her eyes met Sheldon's, he could swear he saw her smirk. He shrewdly narrowed his eyes, feelings of protectiveness swarming in his blood.

_Game on bimbo_, he thought.

"Congratulations, Cassidy. I hope you'll be very happy," Amy said, smiling her best smile. Sheldon could hear the strain in her voice, and how it sounded nothing like the relaxed and genuine Amy he knew.

Cassidy's eyes raked over Sheldon as Amy spoke to her, ignoring her cousin entirely. The action made Sheldon want to take a shower with bleach. And perhaps a brillo pad. He felt tainted by here mere eyes on him.

"Aww… thank you, Amy. Who is this tall drink of water you have with you?" She asked unabashed, causing Amy's temper to flare.

Sheldon bowed curtly in her direction. "I'm not a drink of water. Do you suffer from myopia? My name is Dr. Sheldon Cooper and I am Amy's boyfriend." He made no attempt to congratulate her, or give her any salutations a new bride would receive such as a hug or a kiss on the cheek. He simply stood still, holding Amy's hand tighter and glaring at Cassidy with undisguised distaste.

Cassidy's eyes shifted from the one to the other, calculating.

"Boyfriend, hmm? How sweet. I'm so happy that you finally managed to find yourself a man. What did you do, stick one of your hot needles into his brain? Well, good for you, Amy. I'm just glad that you finally got over those 'awkward years'." She said, using air quotes and grinning.

Sheldon couldn't help but notice in dismay how her comically large breasts were nearly forcing their way out of the top of her dress. It was not a good look on what should have been a demure bride.

Amy blinked rapidly at her undisguised insult_. Managed to find herself a man? Awkward years?_

Stepping forward, Sheldon towered over Cassidy who was similar to Bernadette in height. He'd never hit a woman before, but he felt his blood begin to simmer at her ire toward Amy.

"I can assure you, Amy didn't have to stick a needle anywhere to make me love her, thank you very much." He said coldly, arching an eyebrow in challenge. Part of him felt like a cad for acting this way at this woman's wedding. The other part said who cares? Cassidy pursed her lips, smiling at him.

"I can see you are protective of our little mud pie here. That's rather sweet."

The caustic nickname caused Amy to gasp. How dare she?

"I told you never to call me that again." Amy said hotly.

Cassidy giggled like a hyena.

"Calm down, mud pie. I'm just joking."

"I don't appreciate you talking to my girlfriend that way." Sheldon sputtered angrily. Cassidy seemed nonplussed.

"Everyone at school called her mud pie growing up. Not because she ate mud pies, but because she had hair the color of drab mud. Still does, I see," She said in disdain, her eyes rolling over Amy's hair before shaking her head. "Amy, dear…you are too old to not take better care of yourself. How on earth are you ever going to keep a man like him-" She motioned to Sheldon with a red fingernail – "If you don't try to do something with your looks."

Sheldon had enough.

"Excuse me, but just who the hell do you think you are talking to? I don't care if it _is_ your wedding day. You will apologize to my girlfriend right now."

Cassidy laughed, the fake sound bouncing in the air.

"Or what, stretch? You'll tell my mommy on me?" She challenged defiantly. Sheldon narrowed his eyes at the woman, his mind awhirl.

"No. Your mommy is here and can already see what a little brat you're being."

Cassidy, Sheldon, and Amy swung around, staring in shock at Amy's Aunt Jeannie. She had her arms folded and a stern look upon her face. Cassidy visibly shrank back for a moment before she collected herself, smiling sweetly at her mother.

"That won't work, Cassidy. Not this time. How could you say such cruel things to poor Amy? Have you any idea what your cousin has been through recently? I thought you had gotten over your antics after high school. I can see that's not the case. I'm very disappointed in you."

Cassidy narrowed her gaze at her mother.

"Oh, Mother. I was just joking here with mud- Amy. She knows I didn't mean anything by it. Right?"

Her eyes zeroed in on Amy with calculated derision, so certain she would back her up like the old days. Back then, she would inflict bodily harm to Amy, and she would be too afraid to say anything.

Those days were long gone.

Mrs. Fowler came over, her face weary as she took in the scene and realized that Amy's worst fears had come to pass.

"Actually, Aunt Jeannie…your daughter here needs a lesson in how to behave while in public. And in private, for that matter. I knew it was a mistake coming here. And I'm sorry that you had to witness this. But I have to say this, or I'll regret it for the rest of my life."

Amy turned to look at Sheldon, who was watching her with a mixture of anticipation, fear, and admiration. The tiny smile he offered her held a world of messages, but the one gift that stood out from the rest was courage. Sheldon gave her courage.

He had given her courage to fight while near death, and to make the long journey home from wherever she had been. He gave her courage to face the future, because together…they were unstoppable. And he gave her courage now, being here with her to face her biggest fear; a childhood bully that made her life a living hell.

Cassidy waited for Amy to begin to cry, as usual. Or beg her to be nice. Or some other lame comment. She was completely unprepared when Amy stepped forward and met her up close.

"You are a mean, ugly person who will never be happy because you don't understand how truly wretched you are. And I _do_ feel sorry for you. Because no matter how many hair extensions you put in, or how many breast enlargements you get…you will _always_ be ugly. Your soul is ugly. And I pity you."

Cassidy gasped at her cousin's courageous statement.

"How dare you? This is my wedding day, and you are ruining it. Why are you even here, if I offend you so much?"

Amy looked from her Aunt Jeannie to her mother, who was in tears. Both women looked upset on her behalf.

"I'm here because of my mother. And because of your mother, whom I love very much. Because they can't be blamed for your behavior. You are just as horrible now as you were then." Amy said, her voice firm and strong.

Cassidy rolled her eyes in a bored fashion.

"Are you finished? Because I have _real_ guests to attend to."

Amy laughed a hollow laugh, shaking her head.

"By all means. Attend to your minions."

Cassidy picked up the train of her gown, about to stroll away, when Sheldon came forward.

"Just a moment," He said haughtily, letting go of Amy's hand.

He stepped up to Cassidy and leaned into her. Amy watched in confusion as he whispered something in her ear. Cassidy's face morphed from smug into terrified, her eyes widening dramatically. She couldn't hear what Sheldon was telling her, and for all intents and purposes it looked like he was kissing her cheek in congratulations. But Amy knew better.

When Cassidy's eyes watered and she turned away quickly, Amy finally blinked. Sheldon turned and gazed at her in silence from where he stood, Amy's confusion growing as Cassidy came right up to her.

"I'm sorry for my rude behavior. Enjoy the festivities," She said hastily, rushing off.

Amy was glued to the spot, not sure if Cassidy was sincere or not. She decided in that moment, it didn't really matter anyway.

"Oh, Amy…I am so sorry, honey. I can't believe my daughter sometimes. Are you alright?" Aunt Jeannie asked with tenderness, and Amy looked away from her boyfriend.

"I'm fine, Aunt Jeannie. But maybe we should leave."

Her aunt took her hands in hers, squeezing gently.

"Please don't go. Your sister is here all the way from Boston. And Aunt Flora would be so upset if you didn't spend some time with her. But I'd understand if you don't want to stay." She said sadly.

Amy looked from her mother to her aunt, frowning.

"I just don't feel that I belong here." She whispered honestly. Jeannie gasped.

"You most certainly do belong here. We are your family. I am sorry for my daughter's actions. But don't let that ruin your night. Besides, look at you! You look beautiful. Take your young man out on the dancefloor and enjoy yourselves. Please? For me?"

Amy smiled at her aunt. "Alright. For you." She said sweetly.

Mrs. Fowler walked up to her daughter, pushing a lock of hair away from her cheek.

"I am very proud of you. You stood up for yourself, even if it was to family. You were right, Amy. She will never be truly happy. Unlike you."

Mrs. Fowler's eyes found Sheldon's, who was standing off to the side quietly.

"Take care of her." She said gently. Sheldon nodded.

"Always."

Her mother and her aunt walked away, leaving Amy standing there shell shocked.

"What happened? What did you say to Cassidy?" She asked Sheldon when he came back to stand at her side. He looked at her seriously.

"I told her that if she didn't apologize to you, I would tell her new husband she was having an affair with the best man."

Amy gaped at Sheldon, her mouth hanging open.

"Sheldon! Why would you do that?" She asked him with concern. She couldn't stand the woman, but she didn't want to ruin her marriage.

Sheldon raised a brow. "Because, it's true. Did you see the way they were looking at each other during the ceremony? And when we walked over to her how quickly he ran away? I took a chance…and it paid off. She was caught unawares, the simpleton."

Amy was paralyzed with shock.

"How on Earth could you detect that, Sheldon? You never even met them before."

Sheldon shrugged, pursing his lips.

"Body language? Facial expressions? I don't know…the point is, she knows now not to underestimate an irresistible force."

Body language? Sheldon could not detect something as mundane as the concept of sarcasm, yet he picked up on the fact her oversexed cousin was secretly having an affair with her new husband's best friend. Okay…

She narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend, smiling playfully.

"Funny…I've never pictured you as an irresistible force before," She said, her voice full of humor.

There was no humor in Sheldon's voice when he replied.

"I'm not, Amy. You are." He whispered.

The smile slid off her face as she took in his meaning. Sheldon held her gaze, unwavering, and in that moment Amy felt like she could fly.

"I told you it would be alright, did I not?" He asked her sweetly, smiling in his gentle way. Amy couldn't help but grin in return.

"Yes, you most certainly did."

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Sheldon rarely drank. Usually when he did, he was either goaded into it or tricked into it. Tonight, though, he chose to partake in libations to help loosen him up.

After his run in with Cassidy, he needed to calm down. He knew his limit, so when the waiter asked him if a second long island iced tea was required, he politely declined. He felt pleasantly relaxed, eyeing the dancing guests.

He and Joe were standing at the bar getting their ladies another drink. While watching the festivities, Joe caught him up on the latest family gossip. Amy's great Aunt Flora was there, still going strong in her nineties. She was dancing with a younger man and doing quite a good job of it.

Sheldon felt bad that he had gotten out of going to her birthday party all those years ago. She looked like a hoot, and someone his meemaw could get on with quite well.

He glanced over at Amy who was nursing a glass of wine, watching the festivities with a thoughtful look on her face as she chatted with her sister. She obviously didn't want to be here, but was making the best of it. He admired that about her; she fit right in everywhere, allowing herself to experience new things. So unlike himself, who never wanted to stray too far from his comfort zone.

He found that he admired a great many things about Amy Farrah Fowler.

He never realized it before, but she fit seamlessly into his life, and had done so from the very beginning.

Joe broke Sheldon out of his thoughts.

"I wanted to tell you how good it is to see Amy looking so well. I've known her many years, and she's never been this happy. You are good together," He stated confidently, taking a sip of his scotch. Sheldon nodded his head in agreement.

"We are," He attested, smiling.

Joe returned the gesture, motioning to Amy's mother.

"I don't know what you did to Margaret, but she is completely smitten with you," Joe chuckled, and Sheldon's eyes widened comically.

"She is?"

Joe eyed Sheldon, catching the scared tone of his voice.

"Oh. No, not like _tha_t. I mean…well, you know."

Sheldon nodded, relieved. He thought it was high time he asked his girlfriend to dance.

"Excuse me, Joe. I think I will see if Amy would like to dance."

Joe nodded, collecting the drinks for the girls.

Sheldon looked toward their table, noting Amy and Charlotte engrossed in conversation. He thought he would give them a moment to chat.

"So…your Sheldon is something else. He's very handsome, Amy. Now I can see why you've kept him all to yourself for so long," Charlotte said, winking at her sister.

Amy blushed, the action causing Charlotte's smile to grow even wider.

"Hmm…so it's like that, huh?" She giggled, and Amy lowered her gaze.

"It's _not_ like that, Charlotte. At least, not yet. We aren't your typical couple."

Charlotte perked up, leaning over closer to her sister.

"Define typical. What works for others may not work for you. And that's alright. You always were your own person, Amy. Something tells me, Sheldon doesn't bend to others' opinions of him, either. You look perfect together. You _are_ perfect together. It's like…you are the Sun, and he is in orbit around you. It's…I can't tell you how wonderful it is for me to see. I am so happy for you." Charlotte murmured, her eyes filling with tears.

Amy was stunned. Her whole life, she never thought she would find love; especially not the deep kind that lasted. To know Sheldon loved her, and to have it affirmed by other people…she felt too choked up to speak.

Charlotte noticed Amy's hesitance.

"Amy…you know that man is crazy about you, right? Mom told me how he behaved while you were in the hospital, but to see it with my own eyes…that man is head over heels in love with you. What did you do to him?" She asked in wonder.

Her baby sister was always shy and academically inclined. Yet she had found herself a wonderful man who loved her. She was dying to know Amy's secret.

"I…I don't know. It's more what he did to me," Amy said in awe.

Charlotte's eyebrows reached the stratosphere.

"And just what _has_ he done to you?" She hedged, making Amy blush even harder. Despite the taunting, Amy giggled.

"Would you please stop? You're driving me insane. Nothing, alright? We haven't…we're both…" Amy faltered, and Charlotte's entire demeanor changed. Realization dawned, and she placed a hand on Amy's arm, stroking gently.

"Really? Both of you?" She asked incredulously.

Amy nodded.

Charlotte sat back, eyeing her sister with affection.

"Wow…that's amazing. And by amazing, I mean good. _Very_ good."

Amy hesitantly met her sister's gaze.

"It is? You don't think it's weird?"

Charlotte narrowed her eyes.

"Weird? Are you joking? I think it's wonderful. Amy…do you understand what a special gift it is, making love to someone you truly love for the first time? And the fact that there was never another…wow. I envy you." She said sincerely.

Amy's eyes softened.

"You…you envy me? Are you serious?"

Charlotte nodded firmly.

"As a heart attack. You are brilliant, beautiful, brave…and now, you have this love story that is just…magical."

'_You'll see, and you'll believe, and it will be…magical.'_

Amy stared at her sister, her breath halting.

"What did you say?" She asked, a strange feeling washing over her. Charlotte took the glass of wine in front of her away.

"I didn't say anything. I think you've had enough alcohol," Charlotte laughed.

Sheldon and Joe returned to the table, Joe setting an iced tea down in front of his wife. Sheldon sat beside Amy, his eyes taking her in. She looked distracted.

"Are you alright?" He asked her with concern, and Amy shook her head clear of the cobwebs.

"Yes. Fine."

Sheldon nodded, still not convinced.

"Excuse us. We're going to dance," Joe said brightly, and Amy waved to her sister.

As soon as they left, Sheldon scooted his chair a fraction closer to hers.

"I am so proud of you, Amy. You really shined tonight. But of that, I had little doubt."

The sweet words touched her deeply. Her boyfriend had been pleasantly shocking her lately with his actions. Tonight had been no different. She turned in her chair, her eyes greedily taking him in. Boldly, Amy reached out her hand and drew her fingers down his temple to his cheek. Sheldon stared at her, transfixed.

"You have the nicest skin, Sheldon Cooper. Has anyone ever told you how handsome you are?"

Sheldon's breath hitched in his chest. Hearing such a statement out of a woman's mouth, _this_ woman's mouth…turned his carefully constructed façade inside out.

The only women who ever called him handsome outright were his mother and his meemaw.

He swallowed thickly, his eyes roaming across her face.

"No," He answered truthfully. Amy smiled gently at the softness of his voice.

"Well, I'm glad I'm the first. It's true. Your skin, and your eyes. I've never seen such a shade of blue before. I love the way they change colors depending upon your mood. And your lips," She drifted off, feeling herself flush madly.

Sheldon noticed the becoming blush on her skin, and it increased his ever growing desire.

The strains of A-Ha's 'Velvet' began to play, and Sheldon smiled.

Tearing his eyes away from her face, he motioned out to the dancefloor.

"Would you care to take a turn, Dr. Fowler?"

Amy nodded, taking his proffered hand. They reached the center of the dancefloor, eyes locked. Sheldon pulled her closer, confidently sliding his arms down to encircle her waist. Amy could swear time stood still.

"Let's give 'em something to talk about," He whispered in his best Texas drawl as the dance began. Amy didn't understand the pop culture reference, but she did understand the tone of his voice. Her insides turned to marshmallow as the strains of the romantic song began.

Sheldon guided Amy effortlessly across the floor, leading her like a professional dancer. It never ceased to amaze Amy what a wonderful dancer her boyfriend was. She supposed she had Mary Cooper to thank for that. Of course, Sheldon excelled at everything he did.

"How is it that you can dance in those shoes? I seem to remember a time when you could hardly _walk _in heels," Sheldon chuckled, taking Amy's hand as he spun her around in a circle before collecting her again and pressing her against him. Amy's heart thumped wildly against her ribs.

"I don't know. Maybe it's one of the things I brought back from the 'other side'. Perhaps my balance has improved." She said, giggling. The sweet sound reverberated inside of Sheldon's soul.

They spent the rest of the evening dancing, laughing, and enjoying each other's company.

Sheldon gazed at her deeply, the urge to kiss her too strong to deny. He pictured an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other, each goading him on. In the end, he needed no prompting.

Charlotte had been mistaken. It wasn't Sheldon caught in Amy's orbit. It was Amy trapped in his.

She had never felt so loved or desired before as Sheldon held her tightly, his eyes burning into hers with promises she could only dream of. Amy was helpless to react as he inclined his head to hers.

"I think I need to check into that commune sooner than I thought," He murmured huskily. Amy's eyes lowered.

"Oh? Why is that?" She whispered.

Without another word, his mouth covered hers, his eyes falling shut as if in prayer. Neither one cared they had an audience. Neither one cared that there was a jealous, angry bride standing across the room eyeing them with envy, or that Amy's mother was secretly making her own plans for a daughter's wedding in her head.

All they cared about, was each other. They let go. And letting go never felt so sweet.

A/N- Thank you for reading. Next chapter: Whatever is a man to do after dropping off his girlfriend at her door after a night of romance?


	22. Chapter 22

~Chapter 22~

A/N- Thank you everyone for the lovely reviews. I hope I've made you as happy as you've made me. In case you haven't already seen, the rating of my story has changed to M. We couldn't go from 0-60 right off the bat. It has taken 21 Chapters, but we are finally moving into an area of advanced intimacy. I hope you all enjoy the next phase of Sheldon and Amy's love story.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I might be trembling but I'm not scared…just my desire breaking free. I never had a chance like this before to unlock all the doors to the woman in me. It's so easy with you I don't need an excuse to be the woman in me. It's so hard to believe that I'm feeling so free to be the woman in me…" Heart – The Woman in Me

After the wedding, Sheldon and Amy decided that their post- battle dancing had left them voraciously hungry.

For pie.

The wedding cake served at the reception was too sweet and cloying. It was beautiful, but had the consistency of sawdust. Sheldon figured that since he had booked the limo for the entire night, they might as well use it.

They drove from one junk food haven to another, going through the drive through for the perfect dessert. Their limo driver finally came over the intercom and suggested Marie Callender's. Sheldon looked at Amy in dismay.

"Oh, Dear. We have a combined IQ of almost 400 and we couldn't even think of that?" He asked, to which Amy giggled. Sometimes, even the smallest things stumped her brilliant boyfriend, allowing his humanity to shine through. It was at those times, she found him completely irresistible.

Marie Callender's was surprisingly busy for the late hour. It was a Saturday night, after all. At least there wasn't a queue to wait.

When they walked into the restaurant, all heads turned to see the smartly dressed couple. There were a few truckers who eyed Amy up and down, grins on their faces. One even tipped his hat to her. Amy smiled at him cordially while Sheldon glared at the man.

They sat in a booth, a change from their normal table setting, sharing a piece of banana cream pie. Two forks, of course. Sheldon was in love. He wasn't a hippy.

Or so he kept telling himself.

He wanted a piece of his own, but they only had one left. Being a gentleman, he let his girlfriend have it.

Of course, she being the generous soul _she_ is, decided to share with him.

It didn't escape her notice that the Sheldon she first met would never share anything with anyone, let alone food. She feels a warmth in her chest that grows with each bite he takes.

They are not sitting on the same side of the booth, as lovers usually do, but that's alright. It's still intimate, with their heads close together laughing over the turn of the night's events.

She's never seen him this way, carefree without an ulterior motive how conversation can benefit him. Sheldon doesn't try to steer the conversation back to topics only he deems fit. He simply accepts the easy candor and she knows it. She knows his many tics, facial expressions, and quirks, and knows full well genuine smiles do not come easy to him. Yet he hasn't stopped smiling all evening after their victory.

The Long Island iced tea he had at the reception didn't hurt, either. She wonders if it was alcohol that made him say the things he said to her on the dancefloor and act the way he did, her thoughts straying back to Thanksgiving at the Wolowitz's.

No matter, she decides. He cared enough to do it. And she had to admit, it made her feel like a million dollars, the way he took control commanding her around the room during their dance.

Being trained in ballroom dancing was a trait in him she found shockingly endearing. The first time they did it, at the dance hall two years ago, still gave her fits of giggles. He was magnificent. And yet, seeing him effortlessly box step and cha cha was unnerving. It made no sense, in keeping with his Scientific personality. It was just another piece of the enigmatic puzzle that was Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

It makes her feel powerful, knowing that they worked as a team tonight. She feels triumphant that she showed her cousin that she is no longer that geeky, awkward girl with a harp and no boyfriend. And she felt more than proud to tell the whole room that Sheldon Cooper was hers.

To most, Sheldon is quirky and impossible. He could be maddening. Impossible, even. But his handsome looks, razor sharp wit, and boyish vulnerability called to her as none ever had. Few understood their relationship. It had taken her years to understand it herself.

She didn't miss the envious gazes of several of the guests while they danced. While their significant others were off drinking at the bar, Sheldon was whisking her around the room to several dances.

She knows she looked damn good tonight, with Penny's help, and she knows Sheldon thought she looked good. The look on his face when she opened the door was the thing diary entries are made of. Her serious, robotic boyfriend was stunned speechless.

Homo Novus, indeed…

There were none of his usual quips about why she felt the need to dress up. No indifference, either.

Rather, he let down that carefully constructed guard that he normally keeps in place, and for a moment, she saw it there in his eyes.

Desire.

And it was for her.

Keeping that locket of truth in her mind, she stores it there and covers it with an iron gate. It's hers and hers alone, at least for now. Maybe, he didn't even realize it. Maybe he'd deny it later on, if asked.

But that's alright. She saw it. As she sees it now, the way he nibbles on the sweet confection, bits of whipped cream clinging to his overly full bottom lip as he watches her shyly.

The way he dressed up for her tonight touched her deeply. He didn't have to go to such extremes to make a good impression. She could care less if he accompanied her wearing his number 73 t- shirt. All she cared about, was how he stood by her side, and stood up for her.

Amy watched Sheldon take a sip of his tea, and she smiled at him warmly.

"I think you shocked my family with how good a dancer you are, Sheldon. I know all eyes in the room were on you," She says, delighting in the way his face flushes pink.

She never means to embarrass him; quite the opposite. But she knows he is not accustomed to flattery so sincere, especially from her. He doesn't know how to process it. After almost four years, it still breaks her heart to know he still questions her motives; if she means to upend him.

The irony is that she succeeds in upending him regardless, simply by her attention. Every little thing she does turns him inside out.

He thinks about her words a moment, his lips turning up.

"I think all eyes were on _us_, Amy. Not just me. I wasn't doing the tango by myself, you know. That would just look ridiculous." He smirked.

Fondly, she smiles at him, shaking her head. He is ever the voice of reason.

"I suppose you're right. It was the first time in my life that Cassidy looked at me like a real woman, and not just a freak. I'm just grateful that you were there with me. It meant a lot to me," She said truthfully, knowing she couldn't have done it without Sheldon there.

Sheldon shook his head slowly, finishing off the last of his pie. He wasn't certain why her statement made his heart ache. She wasn't a freak. That statement was far from true. If anything, _he_ was the freak. How she put up with him, he'd never understand.

"Well, I think she is the one with the clink in her armor, not you. You have at least 150 IQ points on that girl. And you don't wear clown makeup," He boasted, earning her a sharp laugh. She rolled her eyes, smirking.

"What? What do you mean, clown makeup?"

Sheldon made a bland face.

"Her face. It was too tan. Too red. Too…yuck. All she needed was a red nose and a curly wig."

Amy laughed at Sheldon's tone, sounding so much like a five year old who just discovered girls.

"It wasn't clown makeup, Sheldon. It's theatrical makeup, for the wedding photos."

Sheldon looked at her steadily, unconvinced.

"Well, whatever you call it. A spade is a spade. I'll be having nightmares for weeks about twenty of her getting out of a beetle bug. Thank you very much, Dr. Fowler, for dragging me to that wedding and putting that image in my eidetic memory," He said in mock indignation, adding a wink for effect.

Amy smiled shyly at him. She realized that he was…flirting with her. And for Sheldon Cooper, flirting didn't have to mean making doe eyes at one another, or whispering sweet nothing in her ear.

For Sheldon Cooper, relaxing enough to show his true, unguarded self was the highest and sincerest form of flirtation. She found that she liked it.

A lot.

Sheldon raised his eyes to hers, giving her a sincere smile.

"You were magnificent tonight, Amy. I'm sorry that you had to experience that heartache, growing up. I never want you to feel that way again."

Amy felt the tears prickling that back of her throat at Sheldon's words.

"Correction, Dr. Cooper. _We_ were magnificent. Combined, we are certainly a force to reckon with." She chuckled.

Sheldon agreed cheekily.

"Yes, ma'am…you've got that right, little lady. Nobody messes with Team Shamy and gets away with it." He drawled, sounding like a Texas Wrangler.

For a full 10 seconds, the couple stared at each other in shock at Sheldon's statement. Visions of Penny calling them Shamy ran through their heads, and Sheldon remembered how much Amy disliked it. He was about to say something when Amy burst into raucous laughter. Her exuberance was contagious, and Sheldon found himself laughing along with her.

"Why are you laughing at me? I was trying to sound imposing," He said, giving Amy a mock glare. She tried to stop grinning, but it was difficult. Sheldon put his fork down, looking away in embarrassment.

"Team Shamy, huh?" She teased after they calmed down. Sheldon shrugged, rubbing his eyes wearily.

"Sorry. Too much?" He asked her, worried that he sounded foolish. Amy just shook her head in the negative.

"No. Not at all." She said softly. I kinda like being part of Team Shamy," she whispered, their eyes meeting and holding.

"Me too," He offered softly in reply.

A comfortable silence descended upon them as they waited for the check, the waitress having caught Sheldon's eye. He looked at his watch, noting the late hour.

He hadn't been up this late since he and the guys went on that arctic expo. He wasn't prepared for the fact the sun never set at the top of the world. At one point, he didn't sleep for three days. That giddy, restless feeling he felt then was present now, but for an entirely different reason.

He glanced out of the window, spying the limo driver sitting in the front seat reading a book. Was that what limo drivers did in their off time, he thought vaguely? Interesting.

His eyes landed back on Amy. She was watching him with a soft look in her eyes, and her perusal of him made him nervous. Cocking his head to the side, he studied her in turn.

Without her glasses on, her eyes looked different; not as big but certainly greener. He could make out flecks of gold in them, and it fascinated him. His own eyes were simply blue. No mixture of exotic colors or the like. Looking into Amy's eyes was like looking into a bubbling cauldron. Colors swirling, so much that lay beneath.

"Sheldon, are you alright?" She asked him, snapping him out of his daydream.

"I think we'll take you home first, since you're closer from here," He said matter-of-factly, ignoring her question. He needed to get control back of the situation. It was late, and he wasn't thinking straight.

Amy nodded. She longed for the day when they would return home together, staying there. Each day together, each hurdle, made her wish fervently that it meant what she wanted it to mean.

Since their recent foray into physical intimacy, everything had changed. They both knew it, as well. Their conversations were more meaningful, their banter more frequent. Their comfort level more stable. Sheldon clutched her hands more, hugged her more, wasn't hesitant to look her in the eyes for a longer period of time. It wasn't mock gazing like he did on the train, either. It was the look of a man who was trying to decipher the meaning of the Universe in his woman's eyes. Understand her. Reach her.

Oh, Sheldon, she thought longingly. You _have_ reached me. Now if I could only reach you.

She had waited this long. She reasoned she could wait longer.

"Are you ready, Amy?" He asked softly, exhaustion evident in his voice. There was much going on in that brilliant head of his, she was certain. But pushing the issue now would only serve to push him away. And after all the progress they'd made, she didn't want to risk it.

She stood briskly, gathering her clutch. "Ready."

They walked out of the restaurant, Sheldon leading her with his hand on the small of her back.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Thirty minutes later, after another tense ride in the quiet limo, they arrive at her building. He escorts her up to the third floor, holding her hand until they arrive at her door. He releases her hand once they do. Sheldon turns to her, averting his eyes shyly. It's never been this tense between them before, saying goodnight….this awkward.

Maybe it's the fact they definitely crossed over tonight into a place of no return. He kissed her out on the dancefloor, in front of everyone for a reason: To let them know she belongs to him. To claim her, as she told him she wished to be.

It was almost 1 am now, and he marveled that in many ways, he still felt wide awake. His body was exhausted, but his mind was on high alert.

It was a very disconcerting feeling for him. Sheldon preferred homeostasis at all times. And yet with Amy, there was always a shift. Either one way or the other. Never in the middle, at base point.

The air feels weighed down with something neither one can define. She smiles at him hopefully, a gentle smile full of gratitude, trying to meet his gaze.

Their eyes connect for a millisecond, and he feels a fissure begin in his heart; he recognizes that look. It means she feels less than perfect, and can't believe he would actually do something nice for her, especially in public. He knows what's coming, as well.

She shouldn't have to feel grateful to him for this, or for anything. It should be a given that he would escort her to the wedding. That he would fawn over her, pay her compliments, shower her with praise, and dance her socks off. After all, that is what any normal boyfriend would do.

What any normal man would do.

Ah, but Sheldon is not a normal man. Never has been.

And he realizes in sorrow, that he's never once let Amy forget that.

He feels a pang of remorse at how badly he's treated her in the past, how he has taken her for granted on so many occasions. It is his job, after all, to make her happy, to shield her from critics. She is always his biggest supporter, fiercely protecting him. Why she does it, is a mystery. How she endures his moods and his callous behavior, he will never know.

He can't help himself, sometimes. He tries, he honestly does. But his brain is just hardwired differently. He is a product of his brilliance, and the most he can do is try to consciously alter his behavior. Living inside his head is an exhausting plight. And whereas he once believed he was immune to human contact, and the emotions that come with it, he now believed the transformation was inevitable. He could no longer resist the fact that he needed Amy.

Again, he feels that remarkable, tender desire to protect her. It's not a new feeling for him; he's been feeling it more and more lately, especially since her illness.

His mind wanders back to their Napa trip, as it often does. The way she had to literally force romance out of him. He doesn't even feel like he is the same man he was then.

'…_Well if you want romance, let's have romance…_' He bit out harshly, angrily, that she would try to betray him into this romantic setting after she promised he'd enjoy the night on his terms.

Desperate words from a doomed man. Never before had words so haughtily and carelessly tossed out backfired on him. He was doomed the minute he spoke them. What followed next sealed his fate. Unable and unwilling to give an inch, he ended up giving a hundred miles. His ill- fated plot to get Amy to see reason, to hurt her, ended up opening his eyes in a way her words never could.

'…_Look, there's wine…grape juice that burns…'_

'…_Now let's gaze into each other's eyes…you blinked, I win!" He continued mocking, out of control. How dare she?_

'…_What's next? Oh, kissing's romantic…"_

Sheldon learned very rapidly that yes…kissing was indeed romantic. It downright scared the hell out of him. So intent was he on hurting her for making him feel less superior, betrayed by her attempts to trick him, that he walked into his own trap. The feel of her yielding to him, so soft…did things to him. His mind, his emotions.

He couldn't lie to himself anymore. He wanted it to happen, probably had wanted it for a long time.

If he were being honest with himself, he would have to label it as love, even then. The inescapable truth is barreling through him faster than the locomotives he loves so dearly.

He feels stripped down, exposed. His soft underbelly exposed for the world to flay open. He feels foolish, too. He is a genius, so above these banal feelings. Isn't he? Schoolboy crushes, lust…it's something he wasn't prepared for, especially at this stage in his life. His mind is clouded with warring thoughts: It's ridiculous. What am I doing? This feels right. She is amazing. She gets me. I feel like a fool. Who am I kidding? It's time…

On and on the thoughts come, and yet, he feels oddly at peace.

He takes the keys out of her hand, slipping the key into the lock. The loud clatter of the tumbler turning in the early morning hours sounding displaced.

"Would you like to come in for a beverage before you head home?" She asks, a spark of anticipation in her voice. For some reason, he has no objections, even at this late hour, to accompany her inside for more talking. He enjoys her company. He enjoys the way she laughs. It seemed they laughed a lot tonight. Something so completely out of character for him, it baffles him. Once again, the brilliant Scientist is at a loss.

She waits for his answer, realizing the look on his face is one of disappointment. She knows instantly what his answer will be, but she doesn't feel slighted. It is late, after all.

He wants to come in, more than anything. But he fears that once he comes in, he will stay there. And tonight isn't the night for such an undertaking. It's late, they are tired, and they both consumed alcohol.

When it happens, and it _will_ happen…they will both be ready.

"I would like to, but I guess I'd better head home. It is late," He says sadly, and the tone of his voice makes her sad, as well.

"Yes, it is late," She concurs, suddenly unsure what to do or say. Thankfully, he speaks first.

"I want to tell you what a great time I had this evening, Amy. Thank you for allowing me to escort you." He says, the words true and meaningful. She looks at him agape, her eyebrows furrowing. She was so sure he'd have a terrible time, blaming her for asking her to take her. And while their surroundings weren't ideal, their time together was. The fact he came out of his comfort zone for her spoke volumes.

"No, Sheldon. Thank _you_. You made a night I was dreading into something wonderful. I can't thank you enough for everything you did to make this happen…buying me this dress, paying for the limo…and the dancing. You really are a superb dancer." She gushes, her smile once again appearing.

It warms his entire body, like when you first walk outside on a spring day and the sunshine hits you full force. He doesn't know what's happening to him, and it scares him. He tries to talk, but words fall short. He musters a small laugh, instead.

"What you did for me was the sweetest thing anyone has ever done. I will never forget it."

Sheldon clears his throat.

"Yes…neither will your cousin," He says dryly, finding comfort in his wit and sarcasm. That, he can relate to. And that is how Amy relates to him, how she knows him so well. She laughs at his joke taken at her relations expense, knowing full well she deserve it. The fact that he, Sheldon Cooper, would resort to name calling and standing up to fight for her honor chokes her up. Her smile diminishes, and she is sorry to say goodbye.

"Well, goodnight, Sheldon. Sweet dreams."

It's now or never. A small, tenuous leap into the unknown. Not scripted, not premeditated, just…in the moment.

She steps up to him, her head coming up to where his disregarded bow tie once sat. He watches her through wide eyes, so unsure she assumes. So frightened at what she is doing invading his personal space. She wants to chuckle at his trepidation, but knows that will only hurt his feelings. Besides, she was only planning on a kiss on his cheek. Even that is monumental for them. So she does it, all at once, feeling his smooth cheek yield underneath her lips. It is warm and soft, and some day, she would like to caress it gently, like she did earlier tonight. Now is not that time, though. And she knows it.

Pulling away, she swears she sees his eyes slowly opening. Was he anticipating a full on kiss? Did the feeling of her lips against his cheek move him to close his eyes? She had no answers to these questions, and the hour was late, anyway. There was nothing left to be said, so she turned to leave, Sheldon watching her intently.

He felt rooted to the spot, like he couldn't move an inch. Every synapse was firing, though. Rocketing through him and leaving strange thoughts in their wake. The sight of her turning to leave woke him out of his stupor. He felt something beginning to take root in the pit of his stomach, and he wasn't sure if he hated it or loved it. But he realized he was terrified to let her walk through that door, away from him, without doing something. He gathered every ounce of courage he could, summoning every superhero power he could muster. She deserved that much, and so did he. It was time.

"Amy?" He asked quietly, but with urgency in his tone that stopped her immediately. She turned around, meeting his gaze. He was looking at her with intensity, and it was she who felt rooted to the spot now.

"Yes?"

A lump the size of the Death Star formed in his throat, but he wouldn't be deterred. Swallowing it down, he opened his mouth. Nothing came forward. He tried again, and to his dismay, could not speak.

She stood there, waiting patiently, confusion etched upon her features.

'_Say it, Cooper!'_ He thought. He reached out for her hand, and she stared at his outstretched fingers in surprise. Nevertheless, she took them.

"Amy, I want to tell you something. When you opened your door tonight, and I saw you standing there…I couldn't breathe. I think my heart stopped for a few seconds. I realized something. It's not the first time that has happened. But it was the first time I let it happen. I didn't push aside my reaction to it. And then later, when we danced? The way you held on to me so trusting…the way you felt in my arms…it was nice. No, it was more than nice. Or the way you shared your pie with me at Marie Calendar's, because there was only one slice of banana left and you know it's my favorite. It's those things, and so much more, that make you so…"

Amy gazed at him, not able to move.

"So?" She questioned, her voice low and soft. She needed him to say it.

Sheldon took a deep breath, releasing it slowly.

"Beautiful. You're _beautiful_, Amy. And I'm sorry that I never said that, never told you before, because you deserve to hear it. It's true. I'm proud to say you are my girlfriend. I love you, because to me…you are perfect. I just wanted you to know that," He said tenderly, his eyes glossy and his lips quivering.

It was the most impassioned speech he ever made to anyone. And it was, without a doubt, the most important one he'd ever make. He could see that now.

In the four years he'd known Amy, she'd changed him. Softened him. Her mark on him was profound, and he simultaneously loved and feared it. Either way, the die was cast. He was too old to keep playing games, to keep hiding behind his IQ, his upbringing, or his strict policies.

The world, his world, was changing. It had changed, without him. Was he ready? No, probably not. But he trusted her. Probably more than he trusted himself. So without warning, without permission, and without thought…he closed the slight distance between them.

Her eyes were moist, watching his every move. He smiled slightly, never before feeling so bold, so free. This wouldn't be a kiss of anger, or a kiss of spite. It wouldn't be a kiss born of pettiness or a spur of the moment whim. This would be a kiss of acceptance, of free will. A kiss of want and of need. A kiss a long time coming. He would savor this kiss, enjoy this kiss. Be conscious of this kiss. And he would see to it that she did, as well.

Tilting her head back gently with his hand, he placed the other hand on her waist, spanning her rib cage. The intimate gesture felt foreign to him, but unexpectedly erotic. He could feel her breath across his face, coming out in small pants.

She was scared, as well. But her dilated pupils and flushed skin must mean something positive, right? He took a moment to just feel himself in the moment. This place, this time, her so soft in his arms.

Was this what all the hoopla was about?

This rush of adrenalin and fear? It was all consuming, when you allowed it to happen. When you didn't suppress it and pretend it didn't exist, or that you didn't need to feel it. He _did_ need to feel it. He _wanted_ to.

Everything left his mind in a fleeting rush:

The atomic weight of hydrogen.

The square root of pi.

The speed of light.

E=MC2.

All of it; every little bit of knowledge that he ever learned, scurried to the far reaches of his mind, locked away. It was terrifying. It was liberating. The only thing he could think of was…her.

Lowering his mouth to hers, her lips yielding and soft, was all that mattered. She melted into him, the hand on her ribs sliding around to her back, bringing her in closer.

Closer.

Closer still…

Until she was flush against him, her head tilted back and his lips covering hers entirely. She tasted of the banana cream pie from earlier. She tasted delicious. His mind gave way, finally. And he let himself feel. His mouth opened a bit more, allowing his tongue to gently swipe her lips. She moaned. He moaned. Was that really him who moaned? God…_it was._

And it felt magnificent. It _sounded_ magnificent. Their combined sounds shot through him fierce and fast, reaching places inside that he never knew existed.

Her hands, which were fluttering in midair, suddenly found purchase on his biceps. They moved together in a timed symphony. Leading and following. Their mouths caressing the others in a dance older than time. It was too much, and not enough, all at the same time. It was them. Sheldon and Amy. Gentle. Passionate, and sweet. Neither could ask for more.

Sheldon cradled Amy's head against the hard wood of the door as he slanted his mouth and traced a path down her chin towards her neck. That notch in her throat that beckoned him tonight smelled as sweet as he imagined it would. Roses…she smelled of roses. He closed his eyes tightly as he inhaled deeply…the headiness overwhelming his senses.

Amy's body began to tremble as Sheldon dipped his head even lower, to the top of her dress line where decollete met fabric. A loud gasp escaped her as he gently kissed the skin of her collarbone before running his nose along the dip of her cleavage. He was helpless to resist her; her scent was driving him mad. And he'd waited a lifetime to do this.

"Ah…Sheldon. Yes." She panted harshly, stunning him with the sound of lust in her voice. She sounded so wanton, that it frightened her.

It didn't frighten Sheldon, though.

It inflamed him.

Everything happened so fast. One minute, he was pulling back to gaze at her with hooded eyes, and the next, they were on the other side of her door with Sheldon pressing her against it, resuming his deep, drugging kisses. He slid the hand that held her waist down toward her hip, gripping it with possessiveness.

Amy's eyes rolled back in her head as Sheldon's lips caressed hers unrelentingly, his tongue sliding deeply into her mouth. He tasted so good, his soft lips a contrast to his hard body. He sucked her bottom lip into his mouth, biting the tender flesh much like Amy did the first time they shared that explosive kiss on his stairs. Amy moaned loudly and repeated the action on him, driving him insane.

In a move he never thought he'd have the courage to attempt, Sheldon gripped her thigh and hitched it upward over his own. The action caused him to press against her completely. His hand cupped her shapely cheek and he almost lost it as she thrust her groin against his.

"Amy…" He groaned, their bodies touching so intimately for the first time. He wasn't ashamed, afraid, or embarrassed. His fingers pressed deeply into her flesh, the reality of finally touching her fine posterior hitting him like a slap in the face.

Amy felt the evidence of what he'd tried to hide so long against her soft flesh. Even through layers of clothing, she felt the heat of him. The hardness of him. It was overwhelming, and they were still fully clothed. He moved a bit, experimentally, and Amy cried out.

_What am I doing? Oh, God, what am I doing?_ He wondered frantically, drowning in the feel of her. The heel of her shoe dug into the back of his thigh, but he instead of pain, he felt intoxication.

Amy's upright knee buckled and he gripped her harder, which only added to the pleasure. He swiveled his hips, pinning her against the door, his body taking over from his mind. Taking both of her hands, he raised them above her head and looked at her with wild eyes.

Amy's breath caught in her throat as Sheldon's harsh, panting breath blew over her face. Neither one moved, locked in this embrace of desire.

"What are you doing to me?" He choked out, mesmerized by her eyes which now looked black.

Amy moaned as he moved again, wanting so much to drag him to the floor.

"Claim-claiming you," she ground out, grabbing his biceps roughly.

Blue eyes gazed into hers, and he thought he would die from pleasure.

"Oh…the way you feel…" Sheldon groaned, needing to close his eyes. Looking at her right now was entirely too dangerous. The guttural sound of Sheldon's voice caused Amy's nipples to harden and moisture to flood her core.

Dear god…she needed him. And he was _right_ there.

"Sheldon…please." She hummed, afraid to move, and afraid not to. Sheldon leaned his head forward, it landing on her neck with a thump. She wanted to touch him; wanted to run her hands through his hair and whisper words of love in his ear. But she couldn't. She had to allow him to move at his pace. So she waited, her body throbbing.

"Amy…ask me to leave. Tell me to leave. Please…" He begged, and Amy swallowed the lump in her throat. He needed her to stop him before he reached the point of no return.

He would do anything for her now. Anything at all. This was the least she could do for him. He needed time. She could accept that. Lord…if this was a taste of what lay ahead, she could most certainly wait.

Gathering her strength, she moved her lips to his ear.

"Sheldon…please leave." She said softly, gently…regretfully.

He nodded against her, his rough breath on her skin making her lose her breath. He knew she wanted him to stay as much as he did.

After a moment he pulled back, his pulse racing madly and his breathing out of control. He could do nothing but stand there, holding her closely to his chest, and marveling at her. Her flushed face, her swollen lips, her mussed cap of curls. The way she clung to him, little pants escaping her mouth.

Amy opened her eyes and gazed at her boyfriend, this man who had stolen her heart with his intelligence and yes, even his sarcasm. Most importantly, his innocence. He was without guile, and therefore the reason she was patient with him.

Sheldon's eyes were glassy and unfocused, a good look on him, she decided. Her own pulse was racing with longing. Never in her wildest dreams had she expected this tonight. But perhaps, that was the perfection in it. It wasn't planned, not put on a calendar, no agreement drawn up to commemorate it. It just…happened. It spontaneously, magically, happened.

He wanted to say many things to her. He wanted to make sense of this, what was happening to him. And it _had_ happened. He was head- first, down the rabbit hole. But for once in his life, he liked it. Liked the way her flushed face and rosy lips were such because of him. Liked the way her clavicle rose rapidly as she inhaled sharply, because he had stolen her breath from her.

It made him feel powerful. Strong. A man. He was already all of those things, so why did he ever worry letting down his walls would change that? He scoffed at his psyche, for allowing him to believe such a baseless lie. And he reveled in the change in himself, as well. His own breathing, quick and uneven. His body, flushed and wanting. He felt giddy with something he'd never felt before, outside of Disneyland.

"I…I don't know what to say," He remarked, rather inarticulately, loving the way her lovely face lit up from within.

This, Sheldon Cooper…this, you did right.

"You…don't have to say anything," She breathed, her hands sliding from his arms to rest gently on his chest.

He smiled his finest, the one that spoke volumes. The one that reminded her of genius and brilliance and of all things magical.

Eyes twinkling, he simply stared down at her.

"Are you sure? Because…I feel I should say something," He insisted, his OCD traits coming out.

Amy beamed at him, her smile slowly fading. She'd waited her entire life to feel this way. Now that it arrived, she didn't want to ever let it go.

It is in these moments that one can see the past and all of its mistakes, and the future and all of its possibilities.

"What would you _like _to say?" She prompted, waiting with baited breath. Her body was thrumming madly with love and arousal.

He wanted to stay. God, did he want to stay. But he knew that this wasn't their time. Releasing her gently, Sheldon took a step backward, his eyes not leaving hers.

"Sweet dreams, Amy."

He turned her sideways and walked through the door, feeling an invisible tie already forming. He tamped down the feeling, trying to think rationally. He needed time to analyze this, compartmentalize this. Test it from every angle, with every theory he could manage. And he couldn't do it at 1 am with the memory of banana cream pie on Amy's lips and his body on fire.

Amy watched him disappear to the elevator bay, before closing the door and leaning back against it and trying to catch her breath.

God, the feel of him. The passion. The sounds he made. The taste of him…

She always knew it would be this way. She'd felt it, from the beginning. That fire between them. The chemistry. The…magic.

And nothing really happened! They were still fully clothed.

Would she survive it, when they actually _did_ make love?

Stumbling to her bedroom, she sat on the bed in a daze. She wanted him. So badly. She wanted to show him Heaven. She wanted to make him feel what she was feeling, and more. She was trembling, shaking, on the edge of her sanity. She needed to calm down. A bath. She needed a bath. It was late, but she knew she'd never relax enough to sleep in this state.

Standing in front of her mirror, she caught a glimpse of herself, and gasped. She looked…beautiful. Just as Sheldon had said.

Rosy cheeks, flushed skin, eyes bright and lips swollen. She looked alive. Radiant. Happy.

Sheldon made her so very happy.

She smiled. A wide, toothy smile that she knew lit up her entire face.

Sheldon touched her. He wanted her. He loved her.

Sweet dreams tonight, indeed.

A/N- Thank you for reading.


	23. Chapter 23

~Chapter 23~

A/N- Thanks to everyone for your support and kind reviews. I appreciate every single one. I am excited to share Sheldon and Amy's blossoming romance with you. This Chapter is a whopper; there was no way I could split it up and maintain momentum. I hope you don't mind; think of it as a double update.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Hands down, I'm too proud for love. But with eyes shut it's you I'm thinking of. But how we move from A to B? It can't be up to me 'cause you don't know. Eye to eye, thigh to thigh, I let go…I think I'm a little bit, little bit, a little bit in love with you. But only if you're a little bit, little bit, little bit in la la la la love with me…." Lykke Li – Little Bit

"Dr. Cooper?"

Sheldon turned around from his white board, his eyes meeting the expectant face of his assistant Alex.

"Yes, Alex?" He asked, his eyes darting over to his phone to check the time. It was almost four, and he had no idea where the afternoon had gone.

"I asked you if you had anything else you needed me to do before I left for the day. I have to leave early because I'm attending a symposium this weekend on Galactic Astronomy. I'm leaving early in the morning and I'm not packed yet."

Sheldon nodded at his assistant, sitting down in his chair.

"No, I'm in no need of anything else. Thank you for all of your hard work these last few weeks. I know I have piled a heavy workload upon you, but I knew you could handle it. You've been a tremendous help. I would have been lost without you."

Alex stared at her boss, stunned. Dr. Sheldon Cooper _never_ offered compliments to her, and rarely did he offer thanks. Fearing something was seriously wrong with him, she took a seat across from him at the desk.

"Dr. Cooper, is everything alright?" She asked with concern, her tone sincere.

Sheldon furrowed his brows.

"Of course, why wouldn't it be?" He asked in return.

Alex sat back, sizing him up.

"Well…you seem distracted lately. You'd never know it by your work, though. I haven't seen such stellar work from you in a long time. Is something troubling you? Is it Dr. Fowler? Is she feeling alright?"

Sheldon's eyes widened at the mention of Amy's name.

"Of course she's alright. Why do you ask?"

Alex gave him a sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to pry. I just know how much her illness affected you. I'm happy that she's recovered and things are back to normal for you. And I was happy to help out while you were away. If I could do anymore for you, please let me know. My workload is pretty light these days."

Sheldon was grateful for Alex. Truthfully, he wouldn't have made it through the last two months without her help. She kept him on track at work, did important research for him, and fixed many equations before he submitted them. Amy had once told him to give her a more active role in his work. He was happy that he took her advice.

"I appreciate that, Alex. Dr. Fowler is fine. I'm fine. Thank you for your concern."

Alex nodded, rising.

"Alright, then. I will see you Monday. Have a nice weekend."

Sheldon offered her a smile.

"Thank you. You as well."

After Alex left, Sheldon leaned back in his chair and rubbed his eyes. He was so ready to go home and relax before his date night with Amy. The week had been long and tedious, and he was counting the hours until the weekend.

Amy had been busy all week as well, but he'd managed to sneak away during her lunch hour to surprise her with something on Tuesday. Seeing her after their evening Saturday had been like a shock to the system.

He walked into her lab, bag of food in hand from the cafeteria, and nearly spilled the contents of their lunch all over the floor when their eyes met across the room. The memories of ravishing her up against her door that night were still fresh in his mind. Even without his eidetic memory, Sheldon had a good feeling he would never forget that.

She smiled at him tenderly, acknowledging his presence before turning back around to finish recording oral notes into a recorder. Riveted, he watched her, having to sit down because a sudden wave of longing hit him so hard he felt dizzy.

Gone was the designer dress, coiffed hair, and sexy stilettos. In their place was his plain, down to earth, studious girlfriend Dr. Fowler. Powder blue cardigan. Hair secured away from her face by a messy ponytail. Glasses perched on the end of her nose. Sensible shoes on her feet.

It was all Sheldon could do not to take her in his arms and kiss her senseless. She was gorgeous, no matter how she was dressed. And while he could admit that he did enjoy seeing her look so elegant, he preferred her just like this. His sweet, demure Amy…with whom he first fell in love.

Coming back to himself, he sighed as he looked around his office. He tingled as he remembered the events at her apartment as clearly as if he were experiencing them again.

After stumbling away in the early morning hours, he sat in an uncomfortable state as the limo driver took him back to Los Robles. He had never in his life felt so aroused. So out of control.

So…_alive_.

He'd criticized his friends over the years for their failures at being led by their hindbrains. Now, he could see how difficult it was to try and stifle those feelings. He should have felt embarrassment over the turn of events. But sitting in the back of the darkened limo alone, an uncomfortable erection in his lap and remembering the feeling of her body so close to his, touching him so intimately…he could not seem to conjure up anything resembling embarrassment.

He felt good.

No, he felt _amazing._

For the first time in their relationship, Sheldon felt like he could actually give Amy what she needed physically. He had no idea what had come over him that night. But he wouldn't change it for anything.

He fell into a restless sleep, full of dreams of his tempting girlfriend.

The way she moaned his name.

The way she begged him.

The way her hands touched him.

The way her womanly curves molded to his body.

The way her smoldering eyes burned into his…

Early before the Sun rose, Sheldon woke up in a sweaty tangle of sheets and limbs- his body on fire. He knew what he had to do for relief. Even that felt wickedly decadent, as he cleared his mind and touched himself to completion, wishing it were her hands doing it for him.

In the years before he met Amy, self- gratification seemed like a necessary evil. He would only succumb to those urges when his body demanded relief that his brain could not provide. Afterward, he felt hollow and ashamed.

As of late, however…the closer he got to Amy, the more his body was in need of relief. It was this strange catch-22 that he never seemed to be able to master.

The sound of his phone ringing brought him out of his stupor. He snatched it up clumsily.

"Dr. Cooper."

"Hi, Sheldon. It's me."

Even the sound of her voice sent him into a raging panic these days. Sheldon gasped before catching himself.

"Hello, Amy. How has your day been?" He asked kindly.

"It's been a bit of a nightmare, actually. I'm extremely busy. I hate to do this, but I don't think I will able to join you for date night tonight. I am nowhere near finished calculating the data on my gene splicing findings. I have to courier these out by Saturday afternoon."

Sheldon frowned, disappointed.

"Oh…well, I understand." He said, but he didn't like it.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. But…if you are willing, may we postpone the date until tomorrow evening? I will have grad student help tomorrow with much of the data entry. I know Friday night is normally-"

Sheldon cut her off, immediately excited.

"No! That would be acceptable. Leonard and Penny will be out of town this weekend, so vintage game night is cancelled. I could cook for you again, if you'd like," He said shyly, biting his lip while he awaited her answer.

Amy giggled on the other end of the line.

"That sounds perfect. Thank you, Sheldon."

The warmth he always felt when he spoke to Amy, looked at Amy, or thought of Amy covered him in its comforting glow. He smiled widely, no caring that he looked like a fool.

"You're welcome, Amy Farrah Fowler. Have a good evening. I will talk to you later."

"Thank you, Dr. Cooper," She whispered, and then she was gone.

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Amy's suggestion that they postpone their date night to Friday couldn't have been more perfect. Leonard and Penny had gone to Palm Springs for the weekend, courtesy of her boss for being the best Rep for the month. Sheldon would have the entire 4th floor to himself for the weekend.

Amy arrived at Los Robles at 7 pm sharp, her face alight when Sheldon opened the door and she smelled the heavenly scent of Italian food.

"I made lasagna," He gushed proudly as he took Amy's coat.

"It smells amazing, Sheldon. You should cook for me more often," She said, winking at him.

Sheldon blushed, averting his gaze and going into the kitchen to check on the food. Amy smiled fondly at her boyfriend's retreating back. He could be so giving when he wanted to let that side of him show. The strange this was, Amy had fallen in love with his arrogance. That he could be sweet and pull the rug out from under her was an added bonus. She watched him as he pulled the casserole out of the oven, placing it on the stove with care to cool off.

"How was work today, Amy?" He asked, reaching up to retrieve some plates.

Amy's eyes widened in pleasurable shock. It was rare that Sheldon was interested in her work. While he had no problem conversing with her about Science, the day to day 'mundane' field of Neuroscience seemed tedious to the Physicist on most occasions. The genuine way he sounded interested tugged at Amy's heartstrings.

"It was good Sheldon, thank you. Dr. Gunderson and I are very close to a breakthrough. We just need a few more tests and I think our theory can be proved. I would love to be able to present our findings to President Siebert by the end of the fiscal year. That way, the University would approve another grant for us to continue the project."

Sheldon came to sit beside her on the couch, offering her a beverage. Lately he was very interested in the advancement of her work, especially the possibility of her winning a Nobel. But the last part of her statement weighed on his mind.

"Amy…if the funding doesn't come through, does that mean your research at Caltech will be over and you will return to UCLA?"

Amy took a sip of her iced tea, before turning to look at her boyfriend. She was puzzled by the apprehensive tone of his voice.

"Well, not exactly. As you know, Caltech has offered me a full time position there. But if I lost funding, I would have to find other ways to cover my research costs. With UCLA, they have grant money in place for the Sciences. I could return there, as I didn't waver my contract with them. But I much prefer Caltech. It's closer to home, it has a more advanced facility for my research, and…you're there."

The last she spoke with quiet shyness, hurriedly taking another sip of her tea.

Sheldon nodded, still not liking the possibility of Amy leaving Caltech. He smiled at her, though, and patted her knee gently. The gesture startled Amy, and her eyes flew to where Sheldon's hand rested atop her skin.

"I'm sure funding will pull through. You are an amazing scientist, Amy. I am very proud of you. I'm happy that you came to work at Caltech," He admitted softly, biting his lip and looking down.

Amy chuckled, and Sheldon's eyes focused back to hers.

"What?" He questioned, and Amy shook her head.

"Nothing, Sheldon. It's just…I remember your being very leery of me working in the same place as you. But ever since I arrived, you've been nothing but wonderful about the whole thing. Thank you."

Sheldon continued staring at Amy, at a loss.

"Well, it's been nice. You being across campus, I mean. And on the days we can have lunch together, I look forward to it. Very much."

Amy watched Sheldon with soft eyes. Where was all of this coming from? While she was ecstatic as of late to Sheldon's increasing affections toward her, she was highly unprepared for it and the emotions she experienced as a result left her reeling.

"I look forward to it as well, Sheldon."

The seconds tripped by as they sat quietly, drinking their iced tea and casting small glances at the other.

"Shall we eat?" Sheldon asked expectantly, and Amy agreed.

"Yes, Dr. Cooper. It smells delicious."

Sheldon nodded, but inside his heart was fluttering like an aviary was let loose in there. When Amy called him by his title, it made him crazy. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and headed to the sink to wash his hands. As he dished up the dinner, Amy followed suit at the sink. When she turned around to grab a paper towel to dry her hands, she bumped into Sheldon who was returning to the stove. The contact was electrifying, and Sheldon jumped back.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon."

"Quite alright, Amy." He dismissed, hurrying over to the coffee table with their plates. Amy never noticed the way Sheldon's hands shook as he set the plates down.

They shared a quiet dinner in which the pair barely spoke; only a few words such as _'do you like it'_, and '_it's delicious, thanks'_. Amy was concerned as to how the evening started off so well, only to become painfully awkward. She tried to keep the conversation flowing, but Sheldon merely nodded and smiled.

After dinner, they settled in to watch a documentary on Space with Neil Degrasse Tyson. While interesting enough, it couldn't seem to hold either's attention and by the end Sheldon was more than ready to turn off the TV. Amy watched him bring their plates to the sink, an uneasy feeling starting in her stomach. What was going through her boyfriend's head, she wondered.

"I'll make you a cup of tea," Sheldon stated, busying himself. Amy watched him curiously. Sheldon dropped the tea bag, then the spoon, angrily throwing it into the sink. The loud clank it made caused Amy to jump.

Sheldon swiveled around to face Amy, his face serious. Amy watched him, her brows pulled down in worry.

"Sheldon, are you alright?" She asked softly, tilting her head slightly.

Sheldon nodded, his eyes fixed on hers. Abandoning the tea, he came back to sit in his spot beside her.

"Are you sure? Because it seems something is bothering you. You've barely spoken since we sat down to dinner," She said, attempting to put her hand soothingly on his knee. Halfway there, she pulled back afraid of Sheldon's reaction. He saw the trajectory of her hand, though, and his brows knitted in disappointment when she pulled away.

"Why did you do that?" He asked, his voice sounding hurt. Amy was getting more confused by the minute.

"Why did I pull my hand back, or why did I attempt to place it on your knee to begin with?" She asked forthrightly. No sense beating around the bush. Besides, she was not going to start playing coy now.

"The former," He said immediately. It seemed he wasn't playing coy, either. Amy took a deep breath and bit her lip.

"Sheldon…I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. Just because we have increased our…physical contact…I don't want you to think I'm lying in wait to pounce on you. I don't want to take advantage of our proximity. I know you don't like to be touched-"

Sheldon cut her off, shaking his head and his hand simultaneously.

"No, Amy. I don't like being touched by _strangers_. You on the other hand…have every right and permission to touch me. You've earned that. I trust you more than anyone. Besides…I belong to you."

Amy's mouth dropped open. The conviction in Sheldon's voice shocked her. Yet the innocent way he was staring at her made her painfully aware she had to tread very carefully here. The mind of Sheldon Cooper was like a live minefield. One miscalculation and you could be blown to smithereens. She knew enough from last summer to be mindful of where she stepped.

"You belong to me?" She asked timidly, relieved when Sheldon shook his head in the affirmative.

"Yes. And you belong to me," He said with tenderness, delighting as Amy's face broke out in a stunning radiance.

He was afraid such a bold statement would disturb his girlfriend. Amy was, after all, a feminist. She was a highly regarded Scientist, self-sufficient, and successful. He didn't want to make her feel like he 'owned' her. Yet he secretly held it in his head and his heart that they belonged to one another, and had for a very long time.

"Is that only because some agreement says so, Sheldon? Or is it because that is how you truly feel?" She asked him seriously.

Sheldon frowned.

"No, Amy. It's not because of the Relationship Agreement. I feel these things regardless. And I have, for a long time."

Amy's eyes blinked rapidly as his words sunk in.

"I have, as well." Amy admitted, her voice a whisper. She looked up, their gazes locking.

The seconds ticked by, neither one speaking.

"Proposal," He stated finally, lowering his eyes slightly. She waited patiently for him to finish, getting slightly worried when he took several deep breaths and blew them out forcefully.

"Yes?" She questioned, her heart in her throat. Sheldon bit his lip.

"I propose that in an attempt to further along our…intimacy…and for us to feel more comfortable…expressing that…you spend the night here. With me."

Amy gasped quietly. Sheldon's eyes shot back to hers, worried that he offended or scared her.

"Um…when you say spend the night…what will our sleeping arrangements be?" She asked calmly, trying not to come off overly eager. She hadn't expected this invitation when he invited her over; she doubted he even knew he was going to extend it until now.

Sheldon didn't miss a beat.

"You and I will share my bed. I would like to acclimate myself to sleeping beside you. I feel it's a step we should take. I think I am ready, Amy. Are you agreeable for such an arrangement?"

Amy blinked. And again. And again. She knew she resembled an owl. Probably an intoxicated one. She cleared her throat painfully.

"Are you certain about this, Sheldon?" She asked, watching him closely for any sign of discomfort. She detected none. "We didn't put it in the Relationship Agreement. Neither party was given at least 72 hours prior notice. We didn't discuss-"

Sheldon cut her off, his voice vulnerable.

"Amy…I'm very certain," He affirmed, bowing his head. Amy caught his eye but he lowered his lashes.

"I want to do this. I've been thinking about this for a long time. I want to know what it feels like to have you beside me in bed. I've wondered what lying beside you would be like. _Without_ you being sick and needing me to nurse you," He admitted softly.

Tears flooded Amy's eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall. She couldn't let Sheldon think she was apprehensive or uncertain in any way. She had wanted this for a long time, too. The fact he felt so strongly about it warmed her from the inside out.

"Talk about embracing the chaos, Sheldon. It's very spontaneous," She said softly, but with a teasing lilt to her voice.

Sheldon nodded.

"It is," He affirmed, his voice a whisper. "But then again, if I were embrace chaos with anyone, I would always choose it to be you."

Amy knew that he was trying. It touched her deeply, and she met his gaze resolutely.

"Yes, Sheldon. I would love to spend the night with you. What are the rules?"

Sheldon considered her words for a moment, chewing on his lip.

"Let's just do what feels natural. We're both adults, in a committed relationship. We should be fine."

Amy grinned at Sheldon.

"Oh, I think we'll be _more_ than fine, Dr. Cooper."

Sheldon's eyes darkened as they found hers. The transformation was stunning to witness. Amy loved his eyes, and seeing what her words did to him made her pulse jump. She looked down at herself momentarily, cardigan and denim skirt fixed in place.

"I don't have any bed clothes," She said, stating the obvious.

Sheldon smiled slightly.

"I can give you something of mine. I know I have clothes that will be comfortable for you to sleep in."

_Something of his?_

Oh, boy…Amy's entire body shivered as she imagined wearing her boyfriend's clothing.

Nodding, Amy watched Sheldon as he got up and went to the sink to wash their plates. She admired the way he moved, the way his height accentuated his presence, the way his clothing outlined his lanky body. She admired his perfect milky skin, his bluer than the sea eyes, his baby soft hair. She loved his full, pouty lower lip and his thin beckoning upper one. She admired the way he smelled, like talc, woodsy and male. She admired his strong yet gentle fingers and masculine hands. She admired his elfish ears, his strong jawline, and his broad shoulders. She admired every physical trait about Sheldon Cooper that she saw. Yet she loved the man he was inside more.

She sat quietly as he washed the dishes, drying them quickly and putting them away. He was meticulous in his task as he was in everything he did. He didn't seem nervous or worried about his proposal, so Amy tried not to be as well. Sheldon was right; it was far past time for them to share this experience. While she felt ready, she also feared she would make a mistake and send him running. Just wait for his cues, she told herself, confident she would catch them. They were always in sync that way.

"Um…do you want to watch something else on television for a while before retiring? It's only 9:30." He said, his eyes flickering between her and the television.

_Wait for his cues_, she told herself again, eying him closely. Noting how Sheldon spoke to her while standing near the hallway landing, she realized that he wanted to go to bed now. If not, he would have come further into the living room. Or sat on the couch next to her.

"I'd like to go to bed. Is that alright with you?" She asked expectantly, and was rewarded when Sheldon offered her a relieved smile. She knew she chose wisely.

"Yes. That's fine with me, Amy. I'll find you something to wear," He said, turning off various lights and securing the apartment before joining her by the couch. He wanted to take her hand and lead her into his room, yet he felt foolish doing such an antiquated thing. Amy would think he lost his mind, no doubt. He settled on moving his hand to the small of her back when she walked ahead of him, a gesture that was quickly becoming a favorite for her.

She had been in his bedroom a few times over the last four years. But never in this capacity. She waited for Sheldon to open the door. This was his private sanctuary, his sacred space. He was allowing her a glimpse inside, and so she would wait for him to make the first move.

"Ladies first," He said gallantly, turning the knob and ushering her inside. Stepping over that threshold shifted something permanently. She knew it, and so did Sheldon. Her mind flickered back to prom, after he told her he loved her. He wouldn't allow her to enter here then. But now…

He awkwardly walked over to his dresser, leaving her standing in the center of the room.

"Would you like something warm, like pajama's…or something cooler? Like a t shirt and boxers? I keep the air conditioner set at 71 degrees. Perhaps you should dress warmly," He rambled, rummaging through the drawer.

Amy deliberated, smiling at his turned back. "A t-shirt and boxers, please."

He turned around, meeting her serene gaze quickly before turning around once again. Did she have to look so damn…attractive?

"Alright." He whispered. He pulled out a black silky pair of boxers that his sister bought him but he never wore. Seriously…didn't Missy know him at all? He wondered in annoyance. Next he opened his drawer full of t-shirts, settling on a v neck white shirt that was soft and worn. His other shirts all bore logos, and he figured the material would bother Amy. What he couldn't reveal was that the thought of Amy's bare chest touching any of his beloved shirts would result in his having trouble wearing it ever again.

He turned to find Amy staring at him curiously, her eyes darting down to the clothes in his hands.

"This should be comfortable for you. Would you like to change in here, or use the bathroom?" He asked softly, certain the idea of her doing it in either place was going to make him lose his mind.

Amy Farrah Fowler undressing in his apartment…His hands started to tremble and Amy noticed it as she gently took the proffered items.

"I think I will use the bathroom. I'd like to freshen up before bed and brush my teeth," She managed, her voice cracking. Sheldon nodded, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Of course. I'll do the same once you're finished. Feel free to use a new toothbrush. They're in the second drawer of the vanity," He answered, sitting on the bed as Amy made her way to the bathroom.

Once Amy left, he released the breath he had been holding.

_Get a grip_! He chided himself, wrapping his arms around his midsection. This was only Amy. Only Amy…

The trouble was, 'Only Amy' was invading every cell of his brain. 'Only Amy' was currently in his bathroom, thirty feet away…naked. The image of that snapped him out of his stupor, and Sheldon jumped off his bed like a fire had been lit underneath him. He paced the room in a circuit, running damp hands through his short hair.

"Oh, dear….oh, dear…" He repeated, trying to calm himself, but failing. What was he thinking, asking her to stay? He wasn't ready. He wasn't nearly ready. Yet when he looked at her tonight, he knew what his heart and his body wanted. Even if his beautiful, erratic mind wasn't quite there yet.

Amy returned a few minutes later, pushing open his door slightly to find him pacing in a circle. He looked frightened and agitated, and that wasn't what she wanted. She told herself to remain calm; it was he, after all, who suggested she spend the night.

Just relax, Amy. He won't leave again. He won't kick you out. Just act cool.

Yet for all of her bravado, the sight of her boyfriend looking on the verge of collapse made her heart clench.

"Sheldon?" She whispered, her voice calm and level. She likened approaching him to an injured lion. She must tread carefully, lest she get her head chewed off.

Sheldon spun around quickly, nearing tripping over his feet. Amy noted his eyes looked wild and unfocused, yet when they settled upon her, they seemed to soften. She remained glued to her spot in the doorway, afraid to make a move.

Sheldon swallowed deeply as his eyes drank her in. She looked so…different. She put her hair up in a high ponytail, the long tresses gracing her neck as they trailed down her back. He never studied her neck before, and for the life of him couldn't figure out why. Her neck was long and graceful, like a swan, and sloped into soft shoulders. His white t-shirt was large on her, yet outlined her figure perfectly.

Too perfectly, he realized all too late, as his eyes slid over the V of the neckline and zeroed in on her bosom. Sheldon felt dizzy and quickly trailed his eyes lower. An even worse mistake, as her womanly hips and delicious derriere stretched the silky fabric of his boxers. Her legs looked long and smooth, and he felt his brain begin to itch.

"Dear Lord," He murmured, bringing a sweaty palm up to rub his forehead.

"Sheldon, are you alright? Are you sure you want me to-…"

"Yes!" Sheldon gritted out, his limbs finally propelling him to move. He took a few wobbly steps closer to Amy, tentatively reaching a hand out to her. She stared at it a moment before gently placing her palm in his.

"I'm…sorry, Amy. It's alright. I just need to get accustomed to your being in my room like this. Like…that," He said, gesturing to her attire. Amy looked down at herself, nodding her head.

"I understand, Sheldon. I do. And it's alright, don't feel pressured, or anything. Let's just get some sleep, okay?"

Sheldon nodded numbly, going to his dresser on autopilot and retrieving his Friday pajamas. He barely spared her a glance before hightailing it to the bathroom.

'I can do this. I can do this,' He repeated over and over in his head as he brushed his teeth, spitting out the paste into the sink and rinsing his mouth vigorously. After swishing some mouthwash and disposing of that, too, he looked at himself in the mirror.

His face was flushed, his pupils dilated, his hair a mess. He looked like a wild beast. He searched the mirror in vain for the Sheldon he knew, but he was nowhere to be found. In his place, was a man on the precipice of something unknown.

'I can do this,' He whispered out loud.

Returning to his room, he quietly opened the door to find Amy sitting on the edge of his bed. She looked up at him as he approached after flicking off the light. The room was bathed in muted darkness, aided by the street lights outside.

"I didn't know if you had a side preference, so…I thought I would wait for you."

Her kindness and foresight touched him greatly. He managed a smile.

"Thank you, Amy. That was very kind of you. I usually sleep in the center, so any side you choose is fine with me."

Amy nodded, looking at him thoughtfully.

"Alright. I'll sleep on the right. Thank you."

Without a word, Sheldon made his way to the left, pulling back the covers for the both of them.

"Make yourself comfortable," He said quietly, and Amy climbed in. His bed was softer than she imagined; in all of her thoughts of Sheldon, she figured him to be the type of man who desired a firm mattress. She was happy to note she was wrong. His bed was soft and plush, and she sank right in delightfully. It reminded her of her waterbed, and she smiled.

"Your bed is nice, Sheldon."

Sheldon looked over at her settling in, feeling a warmth spread throughout his chest. This was no big deal, he reasoned to himself. Just two people, sharing a cushion and a pillow for their heads. What in the world was so bad about that? Nothing, that's what. Millions of people were doing this, right now in fact. They were no different.

"Goodnight, Amy."

Turning softly at the sound of his voice, Amy smiled.

"Goodnight, Sheldon. Sweet dreams."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

An hour later, after much tossing and turning, Amy fell asleep. But Sheldon wasn't accustomed to having anyone in his bed, so he wasn't prepared for the body warmth that accompanied it. Her body heat was comforting, though he was forced at one point to sit up and remove his pajama top. His white t-shirt still remained, so he was decent.

He huffed, rolling his eyes dramatically.

Oh, great. Now there was even _less_ clothing between them.

He stared across the expanse at his girlfriend.

She was on her side, facing him, features relaxed in sleep. Without her glasses, she looked even younger than she normally did. Her lashes were very long, brushing against her eye sockets. He wondered what, if anything, she was dreaming about. She wished him pleasant dreams before she fell asleep. How could he admit to her that lately, his dreams focused solely on her? And that they were anything but sweet. Sultry, heart pounding…but most definitely _not_ innocent.

Sheldon trailed his eyes down her face, to her neck, and suddenly they landed on her chest. Her bosom in his shirt produced alluring cleavage that made Sheldon gulp. He closed his eyes, trying to be a gentleman. Yet the pull was too strong, and he couldn't help it. He opened his eyes again, watching as her gentle breaths lifted her chest in the most alluring way.

Amy was a beautiful woman in Sheldon's eyes. But he never allowed himself to dwell on that beauty for very long. That way lay madness. Seeing her now at her most innocent, her most vulnerable… He felt a heavy ache begin in his thighs, traveling upwards to his groin. Sheldon groaned and bit his lip. He watched in utter terror as she breathed hard through her nose, fearing he woke her with his licentious gaping. Seconds passed while he held his breath, relieved when Amy's breathing evened out again.

Why did she have to look so alluring? Amy shifted, her t-shirt sliding down a bit to expose even more of her cleavage.

"Oh, God..." He groaned, forcing himself to turn around to escape the tantalizing sight. He faced the other wall, trying desperately to think of something, anything… that would erase the sight of her so close. This was a bad idea, he decided. How was he ever going to make it through the night at this rate?

After another hour of warring with himself, and then reciting the dialogue to The Empire Strikes Back in his head, he finally fell into a fitful sleep.

The next time he awoke, it was to Amy cuddled up next to him with her arms wrapped loosely around his waist. Glaring at the bedside clock, he noted it read 1:46 am.

Sometime in the night, he must have turned back around and snuggled up against her, for she was flush against him and the sensation was overwhelming. He shifted his weight and ended up grounding his hips against hers. Oh, Lord…

_Big_ mistake.

Pun intended as he realized he was in a rather delicate situation. He moaned quietly as his hardness brushed the silk of his boxers that she wore. He tried to pull back a safe distance, but the movement caused his bedmate to stir. Amy opened her eyes, drowsily blinking at her boyfriend.

He was so close to her, almost on top of her. And he was hard. They stared at each other silently, chests heaving together as they became fully aware exactly how close they were. Sheldon's breathing accelerated, but he tried to remain calm.

Sheldon's warmth and scent was permeating the entire bed. Amy felt a delicious tremor go through her as she slowly came to her senses from her slumber.

"Sheldon?" She whispered huskily, overcome herself with the need to feel him. He didn't answer her. Couldn't answer her. He was awash in a sea of sensation. Rolling over slightly, he put his weight against her softness. He moaned when Amy shifted as well, forcing her breasts to rub enticingly against his chest. Sheldon was reaching his breaking point. Grabbing Amy's leg, he hitched her thigh over his own much like he did on Saturday night. This time, there was no dress around her knees impeding the progress.

_What on Earth am I doing?_ He wondered frantically, but it was too late. Amy's soft lips met his and Sheldon was lost.

"Oh," She moaned, taking his plump bottom lip between her own and sucking it gently. All of the air fled Sheldon's lungs and his eyes closed in pleasure.

"Amy... What are we doing?" He whispered, snaking his arm around her back and sliding it down to loosely grip her backside. Amy moaned into Sheldon's mouth at the sensation, fitting herself tighter against his chest. The feel of her nipples rubbing against his cotton clad chest made him groan. She rubbed herself against him like a kitten seeking warmth. Sheldon's entire body broke out in goose bumps.

"We're doing what feels natural," She murmured, throwing his words back at him again. Sheldon groaned at the fact his vixen was entirely too smart for her own good.

"You feel so good, Sheldon," She whispered, bending her head down to kiss his neck. Sheldon whimpered as her lips burned a path of fire on his skin. The urge to devour her was becoming unbearable. Rolling again, he dragged Amy on top of him, running his hands down her body in a sensual manner that had Amy panting. The position they found themselves in was shockingly intimate. Sheldon felt her womanhood nestled against his hardness, and lost his breath. Every instinct inside of him was telling him to let go and make her his once and for all. He wanted to. But he was terrified.

Amy bent down to kiss his mouth again, relishing in the way he pried her lips apart with his own. When she slid her lips down to his chin, Sheldon gasped.

This was becoming too much, too fast. Oh, how he wanted to touch her. But his heart was beating so fast he thought he would have a heart attack.

"Amy, please stop." He begged, his voice sounding strained.

At once, Amy pulled away, eyeing Sheldon in concern. She wasn't upset; she knew that this was out of Sheldon's comfort zone. The last thing she wanted to do was make him uncomfortable. She rolled off of him, coming to rest on her side facing him.

"Are you alright? Did I go too far?" She asked worriedly, and Sheldon shook his head rapidly in the negative.

"No, Amy. It was nothing you did. It felt…amazing. It's just… I'm afraid. I keep thinking I'm ready for more, but when we…well, you know…I panic. I'm so sorry," He admitted, rolling onto his back and covering his face with his hands. Amy wanted to hug him and console him, but didn't want to make it worse.

"It's alright, Sheldon. I'm afraid too," She whispered, and after a heartbeat, Sheldon sat up and on his side to look at her.

"Did I frighten you?" He wondered out loud, fear in his voice. Amy smiled at him sweetly.

"No, Sheldon. Not you. Never you. But remember…I've never done this, either. I have the same wants and fears as you do. Trust me."

Sheldon nodded, his eyes still locked on hers.

"Why is this so difficult for us? What do we do, Amy?" He asked sincerely.

Amy furrowed her brows as she pondered his question.

"Well, there is nothing wrong with us taking this slow. We can learn about each other by kissing. Touching…I believe in the old days, it was called 'making out'.

Sheldon looked at her with apprehension.

"Are you sure? He questioned, positive that 'making out' would lead to full on sex.

"Of course, Sheldon. Intimacy doesn't always have to lead to sex."

Sheldon tilted his head and studied her.

"It doesn't?"

Amy smiled warmly.

"No, Sheldon. Not at all. This is what couples do. They enjoy each other. I would never expect you to do something you weren't ready for. And I know you would never push me to do something I wasn't comfortable with, either. That's what makes us so right for one another. We like to spend time with each other. We enjoy one another's company. Let's just focus on that."

Because they were both wide awake, and because being so close to one another was so distracting, they spent the next hour doing_ just_ that.

They snuggled in together under the covers, throwing the duvet over the top of them while they kissed, laughed, giggled, and told each other secrets.

"Favorite song?"

"Hello Again by Neil Diamond."

He sat up and looked at her.

"Yeah? The one I sang for you?"

"Yes. I loved it before. Now I have an even greater reason to."

Sheldon grinned.

It was Amy's turn.

"Favorite movie?"

"The Day the Earth Stood Still."

"Really? I would have thought Star Wars for sure."

Sheldon rolled his eyes.

"Star Wars isn't just a movie, Amy. It's a Saga." He said in indignation. "Besides, I have six I would have to choose from. It's not fair to the other five."

It was Amy's turn to roll her eyes. But Sheldon smiled warmly anyway.

"Well, I _do_ have a favorite Star Wars movie. It's The Empire Strikes Back."

Sheldon's eyes glazed over.

_What?_ Had she read his mind? How could she have known that earlier he used the dialogue to fall asleep?

"You…what? You have a favorite Star Wars? Why are you just telling me this now?" He asked in shock, and Amy simply shrugged.

"What? A girl can like Sci-Fi. Just because I am not crazy about the genre doesn't mean I don't occasionally like to watch a film or two. Besides, after the last May the 4th, it's grown on me."

Sheldon stared at Amy as though he'd never seen her.

"What makes it your favorite movie of the genre?" He asked huskily, scooting ever so closer to his girlfriend. Amy smiled while she pondered his question.

"Well, the fact Luke Skywalker was more mature and open to learning about the force. And the fact he didn't cave in when Vader offered him the world in exchange for his soul. The push/pull between good and evil was so real. The comedic timing was wonderful, as well. I particularly enjoyed the lines of Han Solo and C-3PO. And I would be lying if I said I didn't find the romance between Princess Leia and Han Solo…exciting."

Sheldon's mouth fell open, as he stared at his girlfriend closely. Hearing such words out of Amy's mouth had a definite effect on him. Clearing his throat, he lay back down in silence. Amy smiled, resuming her line of questioning.

"Favorite dessert?"

"Brownies," Sheldon said without hesitation, before breaking out in a blush.

"Interesting," Amy muttered, her smile widening.

"Why is that interesting? Brownies are made of chocolate. And you know how much I love chocolate, Amy. There is no great leap between my love of chocolate and my love of brownies."

Amy smirked, staring at Sheldon's profile in the darkness.

"I get it, Sheldon. You like brownies. Point taken." She said in good natured haughtiness, giggling when she heard him sigh.

"You know very well why I love brownies, Amy," He whispered, making Amy tingle from head to toe. She didn't want to push her luck, so she continued their conversation.

"Favorite holiday?"

Sheldon groaned. "Most assuredly not last Christmas. The fact I saw more of my sister than a brother ever should has scarred me for life. Have you any idea how much amniotic fluid the female body holds? It felt like I was trapped on a ride from typhoon lagoon."

Amy snorted, her warmth surrounding them in their duvet cocoon.

"Amy…" He sighed, surprising the both of them by taking her hand under the covers. Amy relaxed into his grip, intertwining her fingers with his.

"Yes, Sheldon?"

"It was without a doubt this past Christmas. You…and your lovely gift…" He trailed off, words failing him. Amy squeezed his hands. She knew it was difficult for Sheldon to talk about his feelings. So she waited patiently as he gathered his thoughts.

"Thank you for coming over tonight." He whispered gently, changing the subject. He squeezed her tiny hand that lay nestled in his own.

"Thank you for inviting me over," She answered, moving an inch closer to him.

"I'm glad you decided to stay."

"I'm glad you asked me to stay."

"May I ask you something else?"

"Of course, Sheldon. Anything."

Sheldon turned sideways, reaching his free hand over to gently run his palm down Amy's cheek. Her breath shuddered from his touch.

"May I kiss you again?" He asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Amy sighed.

"Always."

Having been granted permission, Sheldon released the breath in his lungs and pulled Amy closer to his body. For long moments, they just stared at each other through the muted darkness. Sheldon finally closed the gap between them, and they kissed with abandon. Deep, slow, wet kisses that drove the other to the edge. Amy felt her arousal spike, as Sheldon reached under her t- shirt to caress the sensitive skin of her tummy.

All the while, they touched and kissed and explored. No pressure. No fear.

"Do you remember when you performed that experiment to increase my affections for you in an accelerated timeframe?" He asked, his hand making wide circles across her stomach to her hips and back again.

"Yes," She said quietly, her entire body shaking from the tenor of his deep voice as it mixed with his soft touch.

"I have a secret for you, Dr. Fowler…It worked."

Amy turned her face upwards, catching Sheldon's eyes with her own. She didn't know what she expected to see there upon his admission, but it certainly wasn't peace. As though the moment was too reverent to disturb, neither one of them moved or spoke as they watched each other, absorbing what this meant.

"Tell me how you did that," He whispered, gently running his fingertips across her abdomen again.

"Oh," She sighed, leaning into his touch. He watched her in wonder as her breathing accelerated. Fascinated by her response, he leaned over and brushed his lips across her collarbones through the cotton of her shirt.

'Sheldon," She whispered, lacing her fingers through his soft as silk hair.

"Tell me how you knew just what to do to drive me crazy. How you made it so that whatever I did, you were in my thoughts. How did you do it, Amy?" He whispered, his lips making their way across her neck to suck gently at her carotid artery.

"Sheldon, please," She begged, tears beginning to gather in her eyes. This was altogether too much. A few hours ago, she stepped through his apartment door for dinner. She never in her wildest dreams imagined the night would end this way.

"Amy…I wish you could feel what I'm feeling," Sheldon said softly as he pulled back to gaze at her.

"I do, Sheldon," She said, her body squirming under the intensity of her arousal. Sheldon continued to kiss her neck, his fingertips caressing her sides in the most enticing way. Sheldon leaned in closer, fitting his mouth over her ear and nibbling on the lobe. Amy thought she would shatter. Until he spoke, and then she thought she would expire.

"Show me." His warm breath sending her blood to a dangerous degree.

"What?" She asked quietly, not sure she heard him right.

"Show me." He beseeched, his voice sounding a combination of contrite and embarrassed.

Amy wasn't certain Sheldon knew what he was asking. Given his inexperience, she was hesitant to assume he meant was she thought he was.

"Show you…how?" She whispered, the breath in her lungs failing her.

Sheldon gulped, his eyes glittering.

"Help me find…second base." He stammered out, exhaling heavily.

_Merciful gods…_

He was blushing from head to toe, although Amy couldn't see in the dim light.

"Are you sure?" She asked, shyness overwhelming her.

"Yes," He rasped, looking at her with dark eyes. "I'm sure. But I don't know what to do," He admitted, and in that moment Amy had never loved him more. He was admitting his vulnerability to her and it the fact he trusted her not to laugh touched her greatly.

"I'm not worried about that in the least. I'm sure you'll do it just right. I'm more worried about your reaction. What if you don't like what you see?" She asked, timidly. Sheldon shook his head.

Was she serious? He'd seen her naked already twice; the first time while she was sick and he bathed her, and the second…

Anyway, there was no doubt in Sheldon's mind that he would enjoy what he saw.

"I _will_ like it, Amy. That was never an issue. I think…well, I think I have always been afraid I will like it too much."

She nodded, understanding what he was so afraid to admit. The great Dr. Sheldon Cooper never wanted to admit he had…urges. Needs. Just like the rest of us mere mortals, she thought wryly

"Just touch me, Sheldon. Do what feels right. I just want to feel you," She whispered.

Sheldon bit his lip and observed her, finding her honesty endearing. Feeling brave, he experimentally ran his fingers over the white cotton of her shirt, overjoyed when Amy's eyes widened and a low pitched moan escaped her.

"I want to feel you too," He admitted shyly, his eyes never leaving hers. Running his fingers over her breast repeatedly, he was overcome with a need he had never known before. To touch. To take. To devour.

This was the first time a man would touch his girlfriend so intimately. The fact it was him…the fact she waited for him…now was no time for fear or second guessing. He had to get this right. He would make it his mission.

Amy held her breath as his fingers moved aside the cotton fabric, exposing her to his hungry gaze. The look on his face as he cautiously moved his fingers across her soft flesh made Amy's stomach tremble. He was slack jawed, his eyes glazed over as they fixed to the spot he was caressing her so pleasurably.

She was generously endowed, always hidden through the many layers she wore. Her breasts were natural, symmetrical, and perfect.

"Oh, my," He murmured, stroking her carefully. Her nipples hardened further before his eyes, the texture feeling glorious against his fingers. Cautiously, he raised his eyes from his task to meld with hers. Blue meeting green, they each felt the sizzling connection of lust and love overcome them. She tried to look away, but he would have none of that. Her embarrassment was short lived as Sheldon slid one arm underneath her back, pulling her closer to him and cupping her breast with his large palm. Amy let out a strangled whimper.

"Sheldon…W-what are you…" She tried to choke out, unsuccessfully as her boyfriend bent down and ran his face across her cleavage.

"I want to pleasure you, Amy. I want to give this to you," He trailed off, his voice sincere and laden with arousal.

Amy swallowed deeply, suddenly nervous. No one had ever touched her this way. He wanted to go even further, it seemed. His hand was one thing. His mouth another…

Even though it was Sheldon, the feeling was new and frightening. What if she made a fool of herself? Sheldon watched the emotions cross her face rapid fire, and he hated the doubt that he saw.

"Amy... Please, let me…You feel so good. I never knew…I never knew," He whispered, suddenly overwhelmed with the biological imperative to make her feel every bit of pleasure he could. Amy swallowed, nodding slightly and Sheldon followed suit.

Gripping the bottom of the shirt, he pulled it over her head carefully. Amy raised her arms, aiding him in his task. Sheldon lay her back down, pulling away to gaze down at her dressed now in only his silky boxers. The way her full breasts looked made his mouth water.

She was beautiful. Womanly, lush, and sexy. No angular bones or boyish curves on his Vixen. She resembled Aphrodite; plush and feminine.

"Amy…you are the loveliest thing I've ever beheld," He said with feeling. He silently congratulated himself when Amy's luscious mouth broke out in a breathtaking smile. His heart soared as the previous doubt on her features faded away.

He resumed his earlier ministrations and began to caress her breasts with soft movements, running his thumbs across her nipples. She could hardly stand the sensations he was pulling out of her, and her eyes began to fall shut.

"Keep your eyes open for me. Please?" He asked her huskily, and she gazed at him steadily.

"Why?" She asked him, her voice quiet.

He had to be honest with her. He wanted her to know the truth. And in knowing the truth, she would know _him_. He couldn't explain the need that was growing inside of him, one that was laden with possessiveness.

"Because…I want you to know who's doing this to you," He answered.

Amy very nearly swooned. Who _was _this man?

"I…I know," She stuttered out, her heavy lidded eyes focused entirely on him.

"Good." He whispered, licking his lips enticingly.

Sheldon dipped his head lower, giving her nipple a soft lick. He repeated the motion thrice more, his eyes never leaving hers, before taking the bud into his mouth and sucking on it gently.

"Dear god," Amy gasped, squirming beneath him. The sight of her boyfriend's mouth pleasuring her was too much. Swirling the bud in his mouth, he used his teeth to gently bite down. Amy saw stars.

"Is this alright? Does that feel good?" He asked, his voice gravelly and low. Amy shivered and gripped his forearm tightly.

"Yes. Oh, Sheldon. Oh God. It does…Please don't stop now."

Sheldon switched breasts, giving the other nipple the same attention. All the while, his hands fondled the tender skin of her stomach.

Pulling back to gaze at her, he was hit with a sudden tidal wave of affection. He'd made her wait years to experience this. He was a fool. Perhaps the time was needed to allow him to grow and mature, so he _would_ not and _could_ not regret that. Yet seeing her now, so wanton and lovely, made his heart ache at the lost time. He swore to himself that he would not waste anymore.

"Never," He whispered, the word leaving his mouth before he could even think about what he was saying. Amy had never heard his voice sound so erotic.

"Please... I need you, Sheldon."

The sight and sound of Amy begging him was too much. He wanted to make her lose control. He wanted her to surrender completely to him.

She was a panting, moaning mess and he was the cause. Sheldon never felt so powerful in his life.

He had no idea what he was doing to her. Having never been in this situation before, he had no clue that if he kept continuing on the path he was on, he was going to make Amy orgasm. Perhaps it was biological, but he couldn't stop. Something drove him onward, pulling her down a road that she was helpless not to follow.

Suckling harder, he pinched her other nipple with his thumb and forefinger, dragging her up to straddle his lap. He was as hard as granite now, from experiencing her pleasure. He couldn't do anything about that, though. This was for Amy. And Amy alone. He marveled how easy it was to touch her now, and be touched by her in return. What had happened to him?

Amy was more turned on than ever before. Sensory overload was hitting her full force. She'd discovered years ago how sensitive her breasts were, but never experiencing another's person touch never gave her much cause to worry. Sheldon was relentless in his pursuit to drive her over the edge. His fingers, lips, teeth, and tongue were driving her into oblivion.

"You taste so good," He chanted, drowning in her delicious scent and taste. It was gardenia this time. He closed his eyes, humming into her flesh.

"Sheldon…you…you have to…you're going to …" She couldn't finish her words, as he sucked so hard a chain reaction began in her nipple leading to her clitoris. Amy cried out, her head rearing back and her chest thrusting in Sheldon's face as wave after wave of euphoria gripped her.

Sheldon held her tightly, rubbing his soft hair against her chest. He had no idea what was happening to her, until Amy dug her nails into his back. Then everything became clear.

"Yes…yes. Sheldon…" She wailed, finally collapsing in his arms like a ragdoll.

For endless seconds, he held her close, his long arms wrapped around her protectively.

"Are you alright?" He whispered in her ear, before sliding down to kiss her neck. Amy tried to get her breathing under control, but the shock and severity of her orgasm left her shaking. It was several minutes before she could even speak.

How was it possible, that he made her orgasm without clitoral or vaginal stimulation?

"How…how did you do that?" She asked in wonder, gazing at him like he was an Angel.

"I might have done some research," He answered quietly. Shyly. And the contrast between his voice and his actions stunned her.

"Research?" She croaked, still panting.

"I read a book once…it said that a woman's nipples were very sensitive to stimuli. I knew it would be pleasurable but… I had no idea that you would…"

Amy let out a harsh breath. "Neither did I."

A sexy smile lit Sheldon's face as he gazed at her. He had never seen her look so beautiful.

"And _that's_ how it's done," He parroted cockily, biting his lip. Amy was powerless to answer as she stared at him in shock.

Indeed. He was magic and everything he touched turned into gold.

Amy looked down at her boyfriend, finding him in a state.

His eyes followed hers, and he was suddenly very aware of what she was going to suggest.

"Sheldon-"

"Forget about it. I didn't do this for reciprocity. I'm not…I can't…yet. This was for you, Amy. Please." He implored, and she nodded.

"Alright," She whispered reverently.

Neither one could believe what just transpired between them. Sheldon felt a mix of pride and love flowing out of him as he gazed upon this most perfect creature who was _his_.

"Come here," he said, pulling her down against him gently. He covered her with the duvet.

"Sleep now." He said gently, wrapping his arm around her gently.

Hours later, Amy woke to find Sheldon staring at her steadily.

"What time is it?" She asked quietly.

"Almost six."

"I should get up and shower. I have to be at my lab by 7:30."

Sheldon didn't say a word. It unnerved her.

"Sheldon?"

"You spent the night in my bed," He said in wonder.

"Yes…I did." She answered quietly.

"No one's ever spent the night in my bed before. Well, not with _me_ in it as well," He said.

Amy smiled a sweet smile.

"I know. I'm glad".

"I liked having you in my bed, Amy. I liked having you close to me all night. I liked…everything."

Amy swallowed, nodding.

"Me too, Sheldon."

They gazed at each other wordlessly, each thinking the same thing.

_Waking up like this every day wouldn't be so bad. Not at all…_

Before it got too heavy, Amy sat up breaking the tension.

"That shower," She affirmed, rising quickly.

Reluctantly he let her go, his eyes following her as she gathered up her clothing and headed to the bathroom. His arms felt empty already. His bed felt empty now too, and she just left it. Yet her warmth and her sweet scent lingered on around him.

Amy hurriedly showered and dressed, drying her hair quickly while Sheldon puttered in the kitchen, not sure what to do or say. He wanted to make her breakfast, but she said she was in a hurry. Besides, it was Saturday. And that was cereal day, nothing special. But as Sheldon poured cereal in a bowl, he realized this morning was _very_ special.

Amy came out of the bathroom carrying Sheldon's clothes. Their eyes met before his gaze flickered down to what was in her hands.

"Shall I put these in your hamper in your bedroom?" She asked quietly.

Sheldon nodded. "Yes. Thank you."

She walked back into his room, and Sheldon let out a gust of air. When she returned, she found Sheldon gripping the island with both hands. He looked up at her, his heart full.

"Amy…after your work is finished at the lab, would you consider coming back here and spending the day with me?"

Amy's eyes lit up.

"I would love to Sheldon. Thank you."

He nodded and bit his lip, following her to the door.

"I will call you later on, and let you know when I'm finished. We can make plans then, alright?"

"Okay," He whispered, quickly leaning over and kissing Amy on the forehead. The sweet action caused her heart to knock against her ribs. She had to leave now, or she never would.

Sheldon stood in his doorway, watching as his girlfriend trekked down the stairs. With a lightness in his heart, he smiled at her retreating form.

As Amy made her way around the landing, she glanced back to Sheldon. A radiant, shy smile lit up her face as their eyes connected, before she disappeared from view. Amy's soft footfalls echoed down to the floors below him, until he could no longer decipher her even with his Vulcan hearing.

It was only then that he allowed his body weight to fall against his open doorjamb.

To say Sheldon was stunned at the turn of events was an understatement. When the evening began 12 hours ago, he never would have thought it would end up the way it had. Feeling his heart accelerate just from the memories, he closed his eyes while simultaneously gripping his chest. He needed to remember everything. Every word, every look, every touch. That shouldn't be too hard, with his eidetic memory, yet he was afraid somehow in his current state he would overlook some nuance.

Recovering himself, he slowly walked through the doorway and back into his apartment.

The apartment still smelled of her. A delicate mix of rainwater and flowers that he secretly loved about her. The scent brought him comfort like nothing else on earth ever could.

It was still early; the sun just making its way across the landscape and dotting soft light upon his window. He could make some tea; hunker down and wait until seven to watch his Saturday morning habit of Dr. Who. He could return to his bed, yet the emptiness of the room without her now seemed…wrong, somehow.

Standing in the middle of his living room, he smiled. He was confused, tired, and strung out. His REM cycle was disturbed, his thoughts a jumble, his body thrumming. Yet he never felt so at peace. So…happy.

"What has that vixen done to me?" He said aloud to the empty room. But whereas a few years ago that statement was mused upon in anger and indignation, it was now spoken with something akin to reverence and joy.

What had she done to him, indeed?

The last few months had turned his life upside down. Chaos was everywhere, but he finally saw a light at the end of the dark tunnel. Sheldon found himself mesmerized by her voice, by her eyes. The way her full lips curled up in a smile whenever she looked at him. The way her soft hand fit into his own. He thought about her constantly. And when he wasn't thinking about her, his heart was longing for her. Something was pulling him forward; a force even greater than his resolve. It scared him, good Lord how much.

Returning to himself, he made his way up the step and around the corner to his bedroom. He peered in as though he were able to capture in time a memory of what had transpired here mere hours ago. Amy's scent was stronger in here, and that made Sheldon close his eyes to savor the remnants of her floral imprint.

He was not the same man he was last night. He wasn't the same man he was even an hour ago, as he woke up and lay gazing at his girlfriend, wondering when he would have the courage to do what he so desperately wanted to do.

Sheldon stared at his bed, cocking his head to the side. An immediate and frightening thought broke through his short lived bliss, scattering everything else.

What if he could not sleep without her ever again?

Panic arose in his chest, and he gingerly made his way to sit down on the foot of the bed, his arms hugging himself against the sudden distress that thought caused. Was this the time? Was he ready now to make another major paradigm shift? Surely this would take great thought and contemplation. It wasn't something to be entered into lightly. Yet he couldn't deny that it filled his being with something akin to joy.

If someone had told him yesterday that he would be sitting here contemplating asking Amy to move in with him, he would have gone running in the other direction. Everything was happening so fast, yet at the same time, it seemed like an eternity in coming.

He needed time to sort through these thoughts. For now, he could be content in the knowledge that he wanted nothing more than to give Amy Farrah Fowler everything she deserved.

And he would.

A/N- So…still with me? Fall asleep? That was long, I know. I hope you enjoyed it regardless. x


	24. Chapter 24

~Chapter 24~

A/N- Wow…the response to last chapter was amazing. I continue to stand in awe of everyone's enjoyment of this story. Thank you for the wonderful reviews and feedback. To the guests who have left such sweet reviews that I cannot reply to, know that I appreciate every one of them. So…was last night's episode a treat or what? I would _definitely_ go to Mars with Sheldon Cooper…just saying.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Don't wanna break your heart, Wanna give your heart a break, I know you're scared it's wrong, Like you might make a mistake- There's just one life to live, And there's no time to waste, to waste- So let me give your heart a break, Give your heart a break, Let me give your heart a break, your heart a break, There's just so much you can take, Oh yeah, yeah…" Demi Lovato- Give Your Heart a Break

The morning after Amy spent the night with Sheldon passed in a blur for her.

After arriving at her lab and getting straight to work, she was able to have her results that were being picked up by courier finished before 10:00 am. She sat in a happy daze at her desk, still reeling from the events of the night before and the early morning hours which followed. Nothing and nobody could have brought her down from the high cloud she was perched upon.

Sheldon Cooper, her sexy, sweet boyfriend…had given her an _orgasm_.

Dear God.

The feeling of overwhelming happiness would not leave her. She knew she was glowing from head to toe. Her entire body tingled involuntarily at the memory.

He'd found second base, alright. She knew he was a genius, but she never could have imagined feeling the way she did after he so innocently began to fondle her breasts. He learned all of that from a _book_?

The way he looked at her…

The way he spoke to her…

Asking her to keep her eyes open and watch?

Hoo…

She was _definitely_ a goner now.

Something told her that there was more to Sheldon's libido than met the eye. She didn't expect him to now suddenly rip her clothes off whenever they saw each other, but the knowledge that he_ did_ desire her made her feel heady with want for him.

Amy had never before been the center of anyone's world. Not emotionally, and certainly not physically. She never got a second glance, and figured the rest of her life would be spent just as lonely. How could she have known how full her life and heart would become after a chance meeting set up by a computer? To think back to those early days made her want to cry now. She had everything she could ever ask for with Sheldon.

That was precisely the problem in many ways.

Each moment spent together made her fall more deeply in love. Losing him now could quite possibly shatter her. Why was it the closer they got, the more terrified she became?

His every word and gesture touched some deep place inside of her that she previously kept locked away. Without even trying, he was coaxing her out of her shell, forcing her into the sunlight.

He had asked her to spend the day with him after her work at the lab was finished. So she returned to his apartment a little after 1 pm that afternoon, to find him mopping the kitchen floor. One look at him made her want to simultaneously giggle and jump him. She stared at him, a wide grin on her face.

Sheldon blushed profusely.

"What? Do you think the floor cleans itself?" He asked her haughtily, softening the caustic remark with a wink. Amy nearly swooned again. Sheldon _winked_ at her. Would wonders never cease?

The look of Sheldon being so…_domestic_…made her heart clench.

'_Stop it, Fowler. He doesn't want to live with you. At least, not now.'_

Amy tried to tamp down those feelings of wanting to spend every waking moment with Sheldon. It wasn't easy.

They made plans to go for lunch, and then play miniature golf. It was wonderful to spend the day in the fresh air and sunshine with the man she loved.

That Saturday night, she helped him do his laundry downstairs. They chatted, laughed, and teased each other as they both waited for his clothes to finish. Sheldon was stunned to see how well Amy folded his shirts. She was perfect, in everything she did.

She didn't want to tempt fate, or make Sheldon think she was moving too fast, so when 10:00 pm rolled around, she said her goodbyes. Sheldon stared at her as though she was speaking a foreign language when she announced she was leaving.

"Oh…you're right. It _is_ late," He said sadly, reluctantly walking her over to the door. They gazed at each other, a wealth of feelings and longings passing between them.

Asking her to stay again seemed to be too much, too soon. Yet each knew their experiment to further along their intimacy had undoubtedly worked.

"Thank you for coming back today, Amy. I had a wonderful time."

His voice was sad, and tinged with something Amy was afraid to hope for. Could he be missing her as much as she missed him, when they parted?

"Thank you for asking me to come back, Sheldon. I had a wonderful time, as well."

Sheldon leaned into her, his eyes never leaving hers as his lips gently touched her own. The sudden urge to wrap his arms around her and drag her back inside was so strong, that Sheldon had to keep his arms to his side lest he do just that. They pulled apart after several moments, breathing heavily.

"Drive safely," He whispered, and Amy could only nod as words failed her.

As she left the apartment, leaning up against his closed door heavily, she felt it. The pull to turn back around and fall into his arms.

Three days later, she was still feeling it.

Amy, Bernadette, and Penny sat on the couch, watching the four men hover around the island, laptops at the ready.

Penny shook her head, taking a large sip from her wine glass.

"They are so cute when they are in Comic Con mode." She gushed.

Amy had a feeling Penny's observation was due to the wine, and not the fact they were doing what she had previously labeled 'A fruitless attempt to secure a last ditch effort at adolescence.'

Sheldon was impressed that she even _knew_ the word adolescence, to which Penny rolled her eyes.

Amy had to admit, seeing her boyfriend so excited about Comic Con made her heart turn over. Where she previously thought his interests were lame, the fact he became so animated and happy over the prospect of procuring tickets made her realize that his likes and interests were just as important as hers.

She thought back to when she and the girls read the Thor comic book, in an attempt to understand the boys' fascination with it.

She remembered that day, so vividly. Remembered how Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj had burst into the apartment dressed in Star Trek regalia, guns drawn in mock jest, and Sheldon's face when he spied his comic books strewn across the coffee table and couch. He could hardly believe his eyes; his girlfriend was immersed in _'his'_ world, debating one of his favorite comic book heroes.

She was, at first, afraid he would yell or throw a fit that his precious books were not in their protective sleeves. But that rebuke never came as he stared blankly at her with what she thought at the time was a look of wonder.

If you had asked her later, she would have sworn that Sheldon was…aroused…by the fact his girlfriend was enjoying the comic book. Since then, Amy had tried to give his likes a chance. She doubted Science Fiction would ever be her thing, but she could see why Sheldon enjoyed escaping into the world of fantasy. Was it any different than what she herself did with romance novels? He was a brilliant man who needed an outlet for the mental energy his brain expunged on a daily basis.

Amy looked over to Sheldon, who was deep in concentration watching the timer count down on the screen. She smiled wryly, shaking her head. Serendipitously, he happened to look up and meet her gaze for a split second. She hoped he would be able to get tickets. And she prayed it wouldn't be a repeat of last year, when he broke down in tears and was almost arrested when he and James Earl Jones pranked Carrie Fisher.

That night, she had been sound asleep, awakened by his characteristic knocking on her door at 2 am.

_Knock knock knock – Amy!_

_Knock knock knock – Amy!_

_Knock knock knock – Amy!_

_Hobbling to the door, she flung it open in a panic. The sight that greeted her stunned her speechless. Sheldon, with James Earl Jones behind him, peering into her apartment in curiosity. She would have laughed if it wasn't the middle of the night, and the voice of Darth Vader wasn't standing behind her boyfriend._

"_Sheldon? What…"_

"_No time to talk, the fuzz is on our trail," Sheldon rushed out, pushing his way into her living room with Jones trailing behind. She pinched her arm, making sure she wasn't dreaming._

"_The fuzz, Sheldon? What are you talking about? And is this really James Earl Jones," She asked, making eye contact with the seasoned actor._

"_Guilty as charged, Ma'am. Oh, so lovely to meet you. My buddy Sheldon has told me so much about you."_

_Amy blinked rapid fire at the man._

"_Your buddy?" She asked incredulously, her eyes widening at what Sheldon was holding. "What's with the bear?"_

_The rest of the evening was an exercise in surrealism as the two men paced her living room, alternating between looking out of the window and looking through Amy's peep hole. _

Shaking her head, she came back to the present and saw Penny shoving a glass of wine in her direction.

"Here, drink this. It's going to be a long night."

Amy nodded, taking a swig from the proffered glass.

One hour, two bottles of wine, and three bags of popcorn later…

"Hit refresh!" Leonard shrieked, the other three men pounding the keys mercilessly.

"I got four tickets! I got four tickets!" Howard bellowed, the other men screaming so loud that the girls had to cover their ears.

"Howard! You are a genius!" Sheldon gushed, hugging his friend in a manly hug."

Penny smirked as she poured the last of a bottle of wine into Bernadette's glass.

"Now there's something you don't hear every day," She said, earning a giggle from Amy and a grimace from Bernadette.

"Oh! I meant from Sheldon," Penny backpedaled, and Bernie shook her head.

While the guys congratulated themselves on their success, the girls cleaned up the kitchen from their makeshift party. The pizza they had ordered an hour ago finally arrived, and Leonard went to the door to pay the delivery driver.

"The girls and I are heading over to my place to do girly things. Try not to miss us too much," Penny said sweetly, blowing a kiss to Leonard.

Howard tiptoed over, kissing Bernie on the cheek, as well. Sheldon stood in the kitchen, staring across the room in longing at Amy.

He felt embarrassed just walking over and kissing her; even though every cell in his body was screaming at him to do so. She must have sensed his dilemma, for she smiled sweetly at him and offered him a small wave before following Penny and Bernadette out.

It was Howard who noticed the tension and as soon as the girls shut the door, he addressed the elephant in the room.

"So…good weekend, Sheldon?" He asked him slyly, raising his eyebrows in a come-hither way.

Sheldon busied himself with pouring soda into a glass.

"Yes. It was rather pleasant, thank you. And yours?" He asked nonchalantly.

Howard wasn't buying it.

"Come on, Sheldon. We're your closest friends._ What_ is going on lately between you and Amy?" Howard whined, making Leonard and Raj gather around the island to hear Sheldon's answer. All three men looked at Sheldon with wide eyes, waiting.

Sheldon tried not to blush, but he knew he was doing a poor job trying to hide it.

"Amy and I…we are…the thing is…" He stammered, each start and stop having the guys further on the edge of their seats. He looked to Leonard, helplessly, and his best friend came to his aide.

"Look, guys…leave Sheldon alone. It's obvious something is happening between them, but it's personal. _When_ and _if_ Sheldon is ready to discuss it, he will. Until then, just leave him be."

Sheldon smiled gratefully at his little buddy. Leonard always had his back.

Howard harrumphed.

"Alright, just don't keep Amy hanging on the hook for very long. Raj and I are _not _attending another gem show to ward off another suitor of Amy's." He said in annoyance.

Sheldon nearly dropped his glass onto the floor.

"What in the world were you and Raj doing at a rock and mineral show? And what is that about a suitor of Amy's? What suitor?" Sheldon asked, his voice rising two octaves. The engineer sprinkled cheese on his pizza, looking at Sheldon sheepishly.

"Well, if you must know Sheldon...Amy has an admirer at Caltech. He conned her into a date at this show in Burbank, and she asked our help getting out of it. We couldn't let her go with the guy, after all."

Sheldon's eyes narrowed to slits, his pizza now forgotten. His eyes flickered between Howard and Raj, who was sitting at the desk suddenly very interested in his plate.

"What do you mean, an admirer? And what is this about a date?" Sheldon asked, his voice deadly calm. Too calm, Howard decided, and he laughed nervously.

"Sheldon...listen. There was this Geologist named Burt-"

"A _Geologist_? What the..." Sheldon sputtered, his gaze darting around the room to each of the men in turn. Howard shook his head, going over the couch to have a seat.

"As I was saying, Sheldon… a Geologist named Burt had a crush on Amy. He was bringing her gems and rocks every day, and she didn't put two and two together. Raj and I happened by her lab one day, picked up on his...interest...and pointed it out to Amy. She was not pleased. But she was not prepared to deal with it. She told him she had a boyfriend, but he didn't believe her. Raj and I had a talk with him, and tried to let him down easy. He still didn't take the hint."

Sheldon felt his blood pressure rise to an unhealthy level.

"Whoa, whoa...he didn't believe her? Why? What's wrong with my girlfriend, that this… dirt person…didn't think she could have a boyfriend?"

At this point Leonard, who had been watching the exchange with amusement, piped in.

"Hey, Sheldon. Nothing is wrong with Amy. I think what Howard meant was that this...Burt guy...probably thought Amy was lying to get out of having to go out with him."

Sheldon sat back in his spot, folding his arms across his chest. There was a man at Caltech who was sending his girlfriend gemstones? Asking his girlfriend out?

This was unacceptable.

"When was this?" Sheldon asked, and Howard shrugged.

"It was a while ago. About a year."

Sheldon frowned.

"Why didn't Amy mention this to me?" He asked quietly, yet the three men heard the underlying anger in his voice. It was rare as it was shocking.

Howard cleared his throat to get Sheldon's attention.

"Amy was embarrassed about it, that she didn't see his advances for what they were. And she was totally not interested, Sheldon. Don't be upset with her." He said hastily, feeling bad that he may have compromised Amy.

Sheldon looked at Howard with hardened eyes.

"I'm not upset with Amy. I'm upset with _him_. Who does he think he is, asking my girlfriend out? I may just have to mosey on up to the Geology department and give him a piece of my mind."

Howard rolled his eyes dramatically.

"I don't think that's necessary, Sheldon. Raj and I took care of it. He won't be bothering Amy again. Trust me."

Sheldon got up, walking around to where Howard sat, and stared him down with daggers.

"I'm one of your closest friends, Howard. Why didn't you tell me about this? I thought you always go on about how it should be brothers before rakes." He spat angrily. Howard scrunched up his nose at Sheldon's lack of understanding of urban slang.

"That's Bros before hoes, Sheldon. And that analogy doesn't apply here."

Sheldon frowned, giving Howard a sour look.

"Well…whatever. But why didn't you think to inform him of the veracity of Amy's claim, that I was really her boyfriend?"

Howard smiled sheepishly.

"Well…we sort of told Burt that Amy was a lesbian. That halted him in his tracks."

Sheldon looked at Howard aghast. The shorter man shook his head and held up his hand to halt Sheldon's oncoming tirade.

"Come on, Sheldon. We've all been there. Give the guy a break. He had it bad for her. This way, at least, he was let down easier."

Let down easier? There was some geode loving dirt sifter running around the halls of Caltech thinking his Amy was a lesbian? Sheldon didn't know who he was angrier at- this Burt guy, or Howard.

"Why...I ought to..." Sheldon began, but Leonard jumped up to Howard's defense.

"Sheldon, look. It's done. I doubt Burt will be asking Amy out again. Leave it alone," Leonard prompted.

But Sheldon didn't want to leave it alone. Sheldon wanted to go punch that rock person in his face. In his stupid, gem loving face.

This wasn't a new feeling for Sheldon. He was well acquainted with jealousy where Amy was concerned. But that was before they were actually a couple. This was the first real threat he'd heard of since they signed the relationship agreement.

He didn't like it. Not one bit. But he sat down and ate his pizza, hating how it tasted like cardboard and how his previously good mood was spoiled.

The rest of the evening was spent talking about Comic Con. The new Star Wars film coming up. Work. Yet through it all, Sheldon's mind remained stuck in gear, like a record on a phonograph.

There was always a wolf out there, ready to take away his innocent lamb. He couldn't allow that to happen.

These unwanted thoughts bombarded him long into the evening. He told himself it was because he was the man, and it was his job to protect Amy. He told himself that he wasn't actually jealous; after all, Amy hadn't given him a reason to be. He told himself that she was happy with him, and their relationship. Yet the fact remained, she had a drawer full of gemstones at work given to her by some lovelorn Geologist.

It made him incensed.

Uneasy.

Crazy.

But that was impossible…his mother had him tested.

He sat brooding while his friends enjoyed their evening. Even the promise of Comic Con tickets couldn't pull him out of the dark pit he'd seemed to fall into.

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The girls sat around Penny's coffee table, painting their toes and talking. Of course, the conversation was steered back to last weekend, and the wedding. They hadn't all been together since then, due to Amy's workload, and they were dying to know how the evening went.

"You know…a little bird told me that Sheldon didn't arrive home until the wee, wee hours of the morning. Just what were you and Dr. Cooper doing until the middle of the night, Amy?" Penny asked, winking for effect.

Amy blushed ten shakes of pink, red, and purple. The girls did a double take, staring at each other with excitement.

"Alright, spill!" Bernadette shrieked, yanking Amy closer to her. Amy gave her pint sized friend a glare.

"We had a wonderful time, in the end. After the wedding, we went to Marie Callender's and shared some pie. Then he took me home. No big deal." She tried to downplay.

Quite unsuccessfully.

"Ames…come on! The way you looked that night, I seriously doubt Sheldon just 'took you home'," She said, making air quotes. Amy shrugged, not wanting to give too much away.

"Well…there was a kiss, at my door. It was…nice."

The girls looked at each other silently for a moment before bursting out in shrieks of delight.

"Define 'nice', you little vixen you." Penny ordered, and Amy felt the back of neck break out in a cold sweat. Before she could stop herself, she found herself blurting out the first word that came to mind.

"Passionate."

She paled immediately at her slip up, fearing the worst when Bernadette grinned salaciously.

"Ooooh…" She parroted, much like the night they played D&amp;D. Amy rolled her eyes. Oh, no.

"Passionate? I_ knew_ it!" Penny yelled, smacking her sofa in glee. Bernadette followed suit, and Amy's anxiety only grew.

"Stop it! I said stop," Amy yelled, no real venom in her voice but it was clear she wasn't pleased with the teasing. "Would you both keep it down? The guys are going to hear you!"

Just then, Sheldon's three sequenced knock ran out. The three ladies stopped their clucking and waited.

"Come in, Sheldon." Penny sing-songed, her eyes landing on Amy and grinning. Amy shot her an annoyed glare. Sometimes, her friends were impossible.

When Sheldon threw open the door to 4B, Penny and Bernadette were prepared to say something saucy to him. Until they caught the look on his face. He looked upset. Scratch that…

He looked _pissed._

"Amy, may I see you please? In private," He asked, turning from her startled form and heading for what she assumed was his apartment. He didn't say a word to the other ladies, and Amy gulped.

The earlier laughter died as the two women gaped at Amy in remorse.

"Great! Now do you see what you've done? You know how sensitive Sheldon is to teasing. Thank you!" Amy said in a huff, grabbing her purse and heading next door. When she walked over the threshold, it was to find Leonard, Howard, and Raj sitting in the living room in silence.

_What in the world happened_?" She wondered in confusion, her gaze resting on Leonard. He offered her a tiny smile, pointing his thumb in the direction Sheldon's room.

Amy felt dizzy. The last time she'd been in there…

She marched on, finding Sheldon waiting for her just inside his doorway. He was looking down to the floor and did not acknowledge her.

"Sheldon? What's wrong?" She asked gently, but instead of answering her he took her hand firmly and walked her inside, shutting the door.

Was he mad? By the looks of things, he was livid. His breathing was shallow and his face a darker shade of red than she had ever seen. She'd seen many sides to Sheldon Cooper over the last four years, but outright anger wasn't one of them.

A pain began in her heart, leeching outward toward her hands. Good lord, what had she done? Did he overhear her and the girls talking? Did he think she told them about their night together? The idea he could be angry at her scared her to death.

"Sheldon," She began, her voice an unsteady timbre, but he shocked her into silence.

Sheldon bent forward, leaning his forehead against hers gently. For a few seconds, she stood stock still awaiting his wrath, but it never came. She listened to his uneven breathing, afraid he was having a panic attack. Risking further discomfort, she gently grabbed both of his hands. When he didn't pull away, but in fact tightened his grip, Amy released the breath she had been holding.

"Did I do something wrong, Sheldon?" She asked timidly, petrified of the answer. He didn't move a muscle, didn't utter a sound for a full minute. Finally, he spoke.

"Why did you never tell me that you had an admirer at Caltech who brought you…rocks?" He asked her, his tone controlled but she could hear the underlying tension.

"Um…what?" She said, at a loss. Rocks? What was he talking about? Amy's eyes narrowed in confusion as she tried to understand. _Rocks_…

Oh…suddenly, it all made sense.

Burt.

"Sheldon…that man was just being nice. Besides, it was a year ago. No harm done." She said, trying to downplay the situation.

Sheldon raised his face to hers finally, the look in his eyes making Amy's pulse race. He looked so…_feral._

"No harm done? Another man bringing my girlfriend gemstones and rocks? I don't know about you, little lady, but…where I'm from, that could get a man strung up."

Amy stared at Sheldon speechless. Was he…jealous? Over Burt? Good grief…

"Sheldon, please relax." She implored gently.

Sheldon looked at her with troubled eyes.

"Amy…I didn't like it. Hearing about some…_Geologist_…giving you gifts. " He whispered, his eyes searching her face, and she wasn't certain what he was actually searching for. But she knew he found it when he lowered his mouth to hers with such tenderness, that the room swam in front of her vision. He kissed her so softly, his soft lips moving against hers slowly, sensuously. The passion behind it made her knees buckle; it was like before when he kissed her, he kept a part of himself separate.

Now, it felt like he was giving her everything. A small grunt erupted out of him, and reluctantly, Amy pulled away.

"Sheldon, what's wrong?" She whispered, touching his cheek.

He stared at her, glassy eyed.

"You belong to _me_," He repeated, the affirmation strong. She was startled and still reeling from his kiss. But she had the fortitude to nod.

"Yes, I belong to you. And you belong to me. We've already established that."

He pulled back, putting a small amount of distance between them. She felt the loss profoundly.

"There's nothing to worry about, Sheldon. I love you," She whispered softly.

Sheldon's eyes widened before he lay his head on Amy's shoulder, trying to calm down. The feelings of possessiveness were threatening to smother him alive. She held his head close to her, inhaling his warm and perfect scent, leaning up on her toes to clutch his shoulders as his arms encircled her.

They stood that way for a few moments, until his breathing leveled out.

He felt like a silly child for acting this way, but he knew she would never judge him.

This woman had changed his life. She gave of herself freely, empting out everything he thought he was and filling it back up with new things. Better things. Things he never would have thought were meant for him. Either by grand design, or by his own hand. And yet…here they were. He was speechless at the depth of emotion he was feeling toward Amy at this moment.

"I…I didn't mean to act possessive. I don't know what came over me. Wolowitz told me about this man asking you out, and I just…"

Amy tilted her head, seeking out his suddenly shy gaze.

"You what? You were jealous?" She asked gently, her voice letting him know that she understood. Sheldon nodded silently.

Being a Neuroscientist, Amy knew that Sheldon's testosterone driven actions as of late were due to the fact they'd recently shared something special. While their bond had always been deep, their recent foray into physical love had brought out the protective side to Sheldon. As a Scientist, she knew it was perfectly natural.

As a woman, though…she was positively overrun with sensation. Her boyfriend was jealous. _Jealous._ As ridiculous as it sounded, it turned her on to know he had staked his claim on her.

"Come on…Let's go back out there before the guys think I've molested you." She said lightly, giving him a quick peck on his cheek.

Sheldon nodded, and as Amy turned and opened the door, he took her hand. She only glanced at it once before walking side by side back to the living room.

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"I'm telling you, the monkey was ready to eat my face off. I put it back in his cage just in time. Next time, I'll carry a tranquilizer dart in my pocket."

Penny and Bernadette burst into laughter at Amy's depiction of her day. The ladies were waiting on line outside the club Penny had chosen, Club 54.

They were all getting together at the Club for a joint date night on Thursday. Last week after the guy's victory at procuring Comic Con tickets, Penny had brought up the idea, as a way for all of them to celebrate.

Of course, Sheldon knew very well Penny used any excuse she got to _celebrate_. He couldn't fault her, though. She was doing very well at work and he had to applaud her gumption. When she brought up going to this particular club, Sheldon did what he did best. He researched.

"_Good lord…this place looks like it was done in early Sodom and Gomorrah. It's a virtual den of iniquity!" He said in shock, and Penny rolled her eyes._

"_It does not, Sheldon. It's a hip, happening place. You will enjoy yourself, I promise. A little trust, huh?" She challenged, but Sheldon wasn't convinced. _

"_It says they have go-go dancers. Will they be…taking off their clothes?" He wondered aloud in fright, his big blue eyes widening comically. _

_Penny looked at Leonard for a little help, but he rolled his eyes and walked away. _

"_No, Sweetie. It's not that kind of club. It's a dance club. They are dancers, but not nude ones. It's more or less ornamental. Something to look at while you're enjoying your drink or chatting with friends. Don't have a freak out. Besides…Amy will be with you. She will protect you," Penny said sweetly, and Sheldon had to admit he did feel better at the notion._

"_Well…alright. But if I see one piece of clothing shed I am out of there."_

_Leonard, who had been standing in the kitchen watching the exchange between his fiancé and Sheldon, quirked his brows._

"_In that case…so Penny, can we pay the dancers to strip?" _

_Both Sheldon and Penny's gazes swung to Leonard, who was grinning cheekily. Penny was amused. Sheldon was not._

"_What?" He asked innocently._

_Sheldon shot him an 'if looks could kill' glare._

Sheldon and Leonard had dropped off the girls at the entrance, where they were greeted by Bernie, Howard, and Raj. As they were walking from the parking garage to meet the others, Leonard stopped and grabbed Sheldon by the sleeve.

"Sheldon, are you going to be alright in there? I'm just saying, the music is going to be kind of loud and I know how you get with crowds. I don't think anyone will be upset with you if you can't handle it. Especially Amy."

Sheldon stared at his friend, touched by his concern.

"Thank you, Leonard. I will be fine."

When he didn't elaborate anymore, Leonard nodded, dropping the subject.

"Okay, buddy. Just…relax."

Sheldon gave Leonard a quick nod, trying his best to do exactly that.

They met the rest of the gang, Leonard taking Penny's hand and leading her inside. Howard kissed Bernadette gently, leading her inside as well. Raj followed, looking forward to seeing Emily later. She was meeting them there after her shift was over.

Amy and Sheldon remained on the sidewalk, staring at each other shyly.

"You look really nice tonight, Sheldon." She said sweetly.

Amy's eyes traveled over his form, loving his attire. She wasn't even aware Sheldon owned a pair of jeans until recently. The way they fit him was quite pleasing. She hadn't noticed earlier, but he was wearing his black dress shoes which lent him a polished look.

The breathy tone of her voice made Sheldon's stomach flip flop. Of course, the fact Amy looked amazing in her dress made the feeling even worse.

Or better, depending on your point of view.

"Thank you, Amy. You look very beautiful," He said awkwardly.

Amy blushed fiercely, ducking her head. He always thought she looked beautiful, even in her conservative work clothing. But seeing her out of her normal cardigans and into a svelte dress was unnerving. The dress was simple and plain, nothing overly done. But the red color matched the red of her lips perfectly. She had a little crystal barrette keeping the hair out of her eyes, as always. Sheldon found himself gulping.

"Shall we go in?" Sheldon offered, holding out his arm for her to grasp.

"Wow, this place is amazing!" Penny gushed, leading Leonard through the crowd to the back of the club where banquettes lined the back wall. She found a table for the 8 of them to sit, turning back to signal Amy and Bernadette of their location. She had to chuckle at the look on Sheldon's face, being led to the table by Amy, her hand now on his forearm.

He looked like a dear caught in the headlights, the poor thing. His eyes followed the go-go dancer's movements, looking away quickly. It was going to be fun watching him here tonight. Clubs weren't Sheldon's thing.

Come to think of it, not much of anything that didn't involve joysticks, lightsabers, or dice were Sheldon's thing. Still, he was here, so that was something.

"I wonder how long it's going to take before Sheldon has a meltdown tonight," Leonard chuckled, sitting down on the high bar stool. Penny snuggled into his side, laughing into his neck.

"Aww, give little Moonpie a break. He's really trying. I can't believe he gave in and decided to come. And I can't believe he's dressed like that. He actually looks like a man, and not a teenager."

Leonard smirked at her.

"I told him the club had a strict dress code. No t-shirts allowed. He couldn't argue with that. You know how he feels about rules."

Penny laughed at her fiancé's duplicity, shaking her head.

"Leonard…that was so sneaky. So devious…I knew you were a genius for a reason." She giggled. Leonard shrugged.

"Well, I figured we were already out of our depth here. We didn't need Sheldon to show up wearing his Green Lantern t-shirt; that would surely end the night with us getting our butt's kicked."

Penny eyed Sheldon, his stylish jeans and buttoned down shirt rolled up to the elbows emphasizing his sleek body. She wasn't used to seeing him look so…hot. It was a bit disconcerting, actually. She could see without a doubt that Amy had no complaints. If the permanent smile plastered on her face was any indication.

Everyone sat down, making themselves comfortable. Sheldon helped Amy onto the high barstool, lifting her up by her hips and depositing her on the seat with care. Before she could even register his touch, she was seated. She stared at him wide eyed while he sat down himself.

"Thank you," She whispered, embarrassed to realize how aroused his show of strength made her. Sheldon was not the type to carry a woman around or lift her up. It took her off guard, but it was in no way unwelcome. He glanced at her smiling a tight smile.

"You're welcome," He said quietly.

Once everyone was settled in, the waitress came over to take their drink orders. Penny, Bernadette, and Amy ordered their usual Cosmo's, and Raj ordered a grasshopper.

Leonard and Howard ordered iced tea since they were designated drivers.

The waitress looked at Sheldon expectantly.

"Sir? Anything to drink?"

Sheldon gulped, looking around the crowded and noisy dance floor. There were entirely too many people, too close, doing things to each other that he never imagined. Sliding against each other in provocative ways. Whispering to each other. Kissing each other…

His eyes quickly darted to his girlfriend sitting so close to him that their knees touched. He needed courage, and he needed it now.

"A Long Island iced tea," He said firmly, and Howard's jaw dropped.

"Sheldon, are you sure you know what you ordered?" He asked kindly, and although Sheldon appreciated his concern, it wasn't warranted.

"Yes, Howard. I know perfectly well what I ordered. I'm not a child," He said, the tone of his voice having Howard raise his arms in surrender.

"Okay, buddy. Just warning you. Those things can really lower your inhibitions."

Sheldon nodded in Howard's direction. He was well acquainted with the tasty libation, but he wouldn't do anything to embarrass himself tonight. Or Amy, he thought soberly.

The conversation flowed easily, everyone enjoying themselves. It was nice being out together, the seven of them, even though it was Sheldon and Amy's date night. He couldn't say he would prefer this to it being just the two of them, but there was something to be said for group fun. Sheldon actually felt happy and relaxed.

Scooting closer to his girlfriend, he rubbed her back gently and was rewarded with a soft smile when she turned to look at him. They locked eyes, staring at each other in a way that had Penny and Bernadette exchanging a knowing look across the table. It reminded them both of the fateful night they all took Sheldon along on girl's night to that bar, and how Sheldon and Amy sat making doe eyes at each other all night.

"Sheldon, why don't you and Amy dance? I seem to remember you can really cut a rug." Bernadette said slyly, the Cosmo loosening her tongue. Penny giggled, the guys looking at each other in confusion.

Howard guffawed obnoxiously.

"Sheldon Cooper dance? I think the term 'When Hell Freezes Over' is more apt to occur first." He said dryly, earning a laugh out of Raj.

Sheldon glared at him, downing the remainder of his drink. He signaled to the waitress for another for himself and for Amy.

"You have no idea what you're talking about, Howard," Sheldon said tightly. Leonard narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"I didn't know you could dance, Sheldon," He said to his best friend, and Sheldon nodded once in his direction.

"It's not that I can't dance, Leonard. I don't dance. There is a difference."

"And that difference is?" Raj asked, genuinely curious.

Sheldon turned to offer Raj his patented stare of haughty derision.

"The difference, Raj…is that while I usually do not _care_ to dance, I was trained in formal dancing from the time I was 8 years old. I can Rumba, Cha-Cha, Waltz, Tango, Merengue, Foxtrot, and Mambo. Oh, and being from Texas, I can Line Dance your socks off," He added, his Texan drawl rolling over this vowels.

The table fell silent as Leonard, Raj, and Howard looked at the ladies.

"It's true, we've seen it," Penny confirmed, laughing. Sheldon sat back with a conceited grin.

"Told ya."

Amy rolled her eyes, smirking.

"Come on, Fred Astaire. Let's go show them how it's done."

At first Sheldon was going to decline, but upon seeing her carefree smile, her twinkling eyes, and the pride he knew she felt on his behalf, he couldn't refuse her. Let the guys see what their ladies were missing, he thought in mirth. It wasn't ballroom dancing, but he could improvise. He knew how to slow dance as well. He remembered dancing with Amy at her cousin's wedding, and he was torn between excitement and fear. Holding her so closely in a public setting was risky. The slow, sensual music didn't help any, either, as 'I belong to you' by Lenny Kravitz began to play.

Sheldon led Amy to the dancefloor, the pulsing beat going through him like a knife. It wasn't an unpleasant sensation; the base was just the right pitch, and the sound was clear. It made him feel alive in a way that startled him. He wrapped his right arm around Amy's back, pulling her in to his chest while his left hand secured her hand. They found a little niche, moving slowly to the driving beat.

"The first time we danced, I couldn't believe how well you moved, Sheldon. I know it shouldn't surprise me; you excel at so many things. But dancing didn't seem like it would be your forte." Amy said, swaying in his arms to the heady music.

Sheldon gave her a barely there smile, blushing. He too remembered that first time dancing, how it was all he could do to breathe when she accepted his hand in hers.

"May I ask you a question?"

"Of course," He answered, concentrating on his steps. The words in the song were making his heart race.

"How come that night you danced with only me? You didn't dance with Penny or Bernadette. I've always wondered why."

Sheldon turned her in a circle, gathering her to his chest again before wondering how to answer her. He decided honesty was best. He was a terrible liar, anyhow. She would see right through him.

"I had no wish to dance with anyone but you. If anyone was going to be that close to me, I wanted it to be you. You were, are, and will forever be the only woman whom I can touch without feeling a sense of panic. But it's more than that. You have always given me a sense of calm, Amy. Even when we were just friends. And now…I find that I feel even better when I touch you than when I don't. And when you touch _me_…I feel like I could fly."

Amy stopped her movements, overwhelmed with Sheldon's confession. It took him a few seconds to catch up, slowing down his steps as well. He worried that he said too much, or offended her in some way. They stood in the middle of the dancefloor, music pounding and people slow dancing around them.

Sheldon gazed at Amy, not sure what was happening. He moved in closer to her, ready to apologize for his blabbering, when Amy suddenly stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. Her mouth was gentle and warm; her lips suctioning to his tightly.

Sheldon stumbled, not expecting the kiss, and for a second felt self-conscious. He normally hated PDA's and felt exposed. But the thought quickly vanished as he found himself fusing her to his chest, deepening the kiss by tilting her head back. The feel of her was like satin; soft and heavenly. Her skin, her sweet smelling hair, lips that tasted like the tart cranberry drink she had drunk.

Sheldon was a man of Science. What the hell was happening to his control? He stood helplessly while this hotsy-totsy from Glendale swooped in and ingratiated herself inside his heart. All he could see now when he closed his eyes was the look of Amy underneath him, moaning his name as he brought her to orgasm in his bed. All he could wonder about as he lay in bed at night was what her soft, warm hands would feel like working their magic on his body.

A body he never knew craved love, pleasure, or attachment.

And he _did_ crave those things, now. He hungered for them to the point it frightened him. Whatever she had unleashed inside of him, with her five year plan, her launch acceleration tactics, and her undeniable charm, Sheldon knew he was in serious trouble.

Amy slipped her tongue along the seam of his lips, asking for permission. Sheldon moaned.

Permission granted.

White hot pleasure shot up his spine as the kiss deepened, and he barely registered when the lights dimmed further and another song began, this time Maxwell's 'Fortunate'.

Sheldon gave up any pretense of dancing, pulling Amy into his arms and against his body. A small gasp escaped her lips as she felt his burgeoning arousal. He forgot they were in a public place, forgot Amy was a lady, forgot reason and being.

That is, until another couple bumped into them, jarring them out of their public spectacle.

They broke apart, both of them with unfocused eyes and wet lips. Amy was breathing heavily, watching in rapt attention as Sheldon drew shallow breaths from his mouth. Wordlessly, he took her hand, leading her off the dancefloor in the direction of the back of the club. He had no idea where he was going, having never been there before, but he knew he needed to be alone with Amy.

Right now.

Amy followed, stepping after him clumsily as her heels clicked on the marble floor unheard through the pulsing music. She was so turned on by this take charge Sheldon, she couldn't even think straight. When they reached what was obviously a cool down room, full of soft easy chairs and sofas, Amy's heart pounded harder in her chest. The room was empty, everyone out of the dancefloor or at the bar. Sheldon dragged her inside, sitting down in a plush chair in the back that was obscured by gauzy curtains, and pulled Amy onto his lap. She landed with a soft thud, her arms wrapping around Sheldon's neck.

"Amy…I need to kiss you. I've needed to kiss you all week," He groaned, his lips already tracing a path down her throat.

She threw her head back, eyes slipping shut at the incredible feel of his mouth on her skin.

Reaching up and cupping Amy's face, Sheldon brought her mouth down to meet his. Her lips were plump and perfect, sliding over his enticingly. He slid his hand down her neck, laying his palm over her heart in a movement she found heartbreakingly beautiful.

"Sheldon…we are in public. We can't…let this go too far," She whispered breathily, her actions contradicting her words as she ground down on his lap enticingly. It was done innocently enough; she only wanted to make herself more comfortable. But the effect the action had on Sheldon caused him to lose his breath.

"Good Lord, Woman…please don't do that," He warned, kissing her mouth again roughly before breaking away to lean his forehead on hers.

Amy chuckled, rubbing his nose with her own.

"What happened to you?" She asked him, the same words he spoke to her in the taxi after the first time they danced. His perfect memory registered what she said, and he drew back to gaze at her in longing and admiration.

"I…I don't know," He answered honestly, stuttering.

"Who am I, Amy? Sheldon Cooper does not 'make out' in dance clubs. He doesn't do this," He motioned between them, referencing where they were currently sitting. "What _is_ happening to me?"

She would have been worried for him if she had recognized fear in his voice. But she could only detect wonder in it. Whatever he was feeling, he had to come to terms with it, or was trying to. She couldn't do that for him. She kissed him gently, pulling back to meet his eyes.

"What do you _think_ is happening?" She asked tentatively. His eyes burned into hers, his mouth falling open on a soundless gasp. It was like watching the sun dawning as the realization hit him hard and fast.

'…_I'm falling in love….falling…falling…down…no…more fallen. I've arrived. I'm already there. I've fallen. I've hit the ground..._' He thought frantically, his body reacting by shaking.

Amy felt the tremors going through him, knowing he was finally coming to terms with his feelings. He looked positively terrified as his thoughts churned in his brain. Amy sat still, witnessing his realization, not able to breathe.

"Amy," He whispered, afraid, holding her to his chest as the feelings he was trying desperately to hold at bay grabbed ahold of him. She hugged him back, her heart thumping wildly at the feel of his trembling body. He was so frightened, her poor Sheldon.

"Hey…it's ok, Sheldon. Just breathe…" She soothed, stroking his hair gently.

He wrapped his arms around her back, grateful for her warmth and gentleness. They held each other tightly, their earlier passion abated but the feelings beneath it no less potent. Sheldon pulled away, his face a mask of open vulnerability.

"We're just two people, dancing with their friends on a much needed night out. Don't overthink it, okay?" She asked softly, her thumb stroking his cheek with infinite tenderness. He nodded at her, never before feeling so trusting of another human being. They sat there for a few moments, just relishing the comfort the other was giving.

"Come on, Dr. Cooper. Let's go back to the table. Our friends are going to start talking. You know how much they like to live vicariously through us." She said jovially.

Sheldon smiled, gathering his wits.

"Let them talk. They're only jealous, after all," He sassed, gently lifting Amy off of his lap and leading her through the maze of bodies back to their table.

Upon returning they noticed Raj was gone, as Emily had finally shown up and they were now on the dancefloor. Howard and Bernadette were dancing as well. Leonard and Penny were holding each other close, whispering in each other's ears. When they registered Sheldon and Amy's presence, they sat upright again.

"Hey…you're back. Where were you?" Penny slurred, and Sheldon knew she had had more than a few Cosmo's already. He led Amy back to her seat, once again helping her on the stool.

"Amy needed to use the ladies room. I escorted her. There's no telling what kind of people frequent this place,' He said with indignation, shocking Amy by winking at her. Amy smiled demurely, turning her face away.

No telling, indeed.

Two hours later, after leaving the club and heading to a close by diner for some greasy food and much needed coffee to sober up, the gang sat around a big round table laughing. They debated everything from Science to Entertainment.

Sheldon was distracted as Amy fed him some pie. He meant what he said earlier to her – he didn't recognize himself lately. He wasn't necessarily afraid with the changes or even annoyed. It was simply surreal. So this was what _average_ people did. Dancing with their significant others. Hanging out with friends and goofing off. Science and Dark Matter and String Theory nowhere to be found. Mundane, banal, borderline ridiculous…

So why on earth did it feel so…_right_?

Why did laughing with the people who meant the most to him feel so fulfilling? Perhaps it was because he knew, deep down, that no matter how crazy they got, they would always be intelligent people. Maybe it was okay to 'cut loose', as Penny said, once in a while.

Or maybe it was because Sheldon had finally learned to appreciate the lighter side of life, as he had promised he would when Amy was sick. He didn't want to wake up one day and regret missing out on things that he shouldn't have taken for granted.

The confusion of his new found feelings lasted until Leonard pulled up to Amy's building, and Sheldon escorted her to her door. As they neared her apartment, Sheldon moved ahead and held out his hand for her keys. Amy smiled, depositing them in his open palm.

"I _can_ open my own door, Dr. Cooper. I'm not _that_ tipsy," She laughed, the gentle sound echoing down the hallway. Sheldon shook his head.

"I didn't imply you were, Dr. Fowler. I was simply doing the gentlemanly thing in opening your door."

He pushed it open, waiting for her step inside before he followed her. She hadn't expected that; normally, Sheldon would drop her off at the door and say goodnight. This was new.

"Would you like me to check the apartment for burglars?" He asked seriously. Amy snorted as ladylike as she could.

"No, that won't be necessary. Although, you could help me out of this dress before you leave. Penny had to help me zip it up earlier. It tightens in the mid back and I can't reach it." She said, removing the thin cardigan she had over it.

Her tone was businesslike and serious. But to Sheldon, it didn't matter. He wanted to help her out of that dress, alright.

She kicked off her heels, stepping up to him until they were almost chest to chest. The action of removing her shoes had made her even smaller. He looked down on her with undisguised hunger. From his vantage point he could see straight down into her cleavage where the dress did indeed tighten at the waist. In doing so, it showcased her breasts.

Sheldon swallowed painfully. His eyes slid back up to hers, and she was watching him curiously. They were locked in each other's orbit once again. Eyeing each other cautiously, neither one blinked. Finally, Sheldon broke the silence.

"Turn around." He whispered, the soft demand brooking no argument.

Amy nodded her head, doing what she was told. Sheldon took a small step forward until his chest met her back, and he gathered her long hair in his hand to slide it across her shoulders where he carefully laid it across her clavicle. The zipper on the dress was tiny; one wrong move and either it would break, or the dress would snag.

Logically, he knew she honestly needed help removing it. Logic flew out the window, though, when he placed one trembling hand on the top of the dress, and the fingers of his other hand at the zipper. He pulled down carefully, the slight zing sound of the zipper lowering in the otherwise quiet darkness sounding oddly titillating.

Amy's eyes slid shut as she felt Sheldon's warm palm slide down her back, separating the two halves of the dress. She was aroused and relaxed simultaneously. She abruptly opened her eyes when she heard Sheldon's sharp intake of breath.

Oh…she had forgotten. She bit her lip in trepidation as well as anticipation at Sheldon's reaction.

This dress had a built in shelf bra, so she wasn't wearing a traditional one. All he could see upon lowering the zipper to her waist was soft, pale skin.

They stood still, each of them breathing heavily as Sheldon raked his eyes up and down her naked back. So much beauty…

He knew he should leave. Right now. Say goodnight and turn and walk out that door. He almost made it, too. Until Amy turned slightly, her eyes meeting his in the dim light. He couldn't look at her now. That would crumble the last of his resolve. As if led by an invisible force, his hand trailed out and caressed the expanse of her back.

Amy shuddered at his touch, letting out a small moan. The sound reverberated in Sheldon's ears, oozing in like molasses. His other hand joined the first, sliding around inside the dress to latch onto Amy's stomach while the other slid down to her hip, pulling her against him.

"Sheldon," She moaned, leaning her head back on his chest. It was all Sheldon could do to not devour her where they stood.

"They're…waiting for me. Downstairs," Sheldon murmured, his lips touching Amy's neck beneath her ear. She smelled so damn good.

"Uh huh," She agreed, her hand reaching up behind her to clasp him around the neck.

"Amy," He whispered, giving up the fight and sliding the hand on her stomach up to cup her naked breast. Her nipple pebbled and in that moment he wanted the dress gone.

Dear Lord in Heaven…

"Yes," She answered softly, melting into his touch. He didn't know if she was answering him for addressing her, or affirming how much she liked what he was doing to her. He had to leave.

Now.

"Amy please… I have to go." He groaned, his voice raspy.

Amy let out a sigh that was half sad, half angry.

"Are you sure?" She questioned, her hand fondling the hair at the nape of his neck. In response, his hand tightened on her breast. She was about to turn around and embrace him when he backed away quickly.

"Oh…alright," She acquiesced, gathering up the bodice of the dress to her bosom. When she turned and met his aroused gaze, she smirked at him.

"Arousal is a good look on you, Dr. Cooper."

He stared at her, something deep inside of him wanting to prove to her_ how_ good.

"Is that a fact?" He asked, finding his voice. He tried to sound nonchalant, but it was futile. When Amy merely shook her head, he coughed and looked away. He reached the door and turned around.

"I could say the same to you too, Dr. Fowler."

She blushed furiously, the bloom covering her exposed chest beautifully.

He was _definitely_ leaving now.

He turned to leave, but stopped, pinning her with a molten look.

"Lock this door." He ordered, his voice sounding strange. And then he was gone.

Amy let the breath she was holding out.

Hoo…

She stepped up to the door, adhering to Sheldon's wishes and securing the lock in place. Her womanly pride reflected that the only wolf she had to fear tonight…was Sheldon.

Is that what he had meant? Was he so unsure of his own control to not return and ravish her? That thought made her positively giddy as she turned and made her way to the bedroom. A shower was in order.

A cold one.

A/N- Thank you for reading. Jealous Sheldon…I couldn't resist.


	25. Chapter 25

~Chapter 25~

A/N- Thanks to everyone again for the lovely reviews. Chatting with all of you has been wonderful. I think the consensus is most of us like jealous Sheldon. :) This Chapter begins a three part arc. While this part is shorter than the next, which again will be massive, I felt I had to cut it where I did for continuity. I am so pleased that you are still enjoying.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…This old life seemed much too long- Little point in going on. I couldn't think of what to say- Words just vanished in the haze. I was feeling cold and tired- Yeah, kind of sad and uninspired. When it almost seemed too much- I see your face and sense the grace and feel the magic in your touch. Oh, lay your hands- Lay your hands on me…" Thompson Twins – Lay Your Hands on Me ~ Part 1

"All packed for our adventure this weekend?" Leonard asked Penny, who was in his kitchen getting them some dessert. She smiled sweetly as she pulled out some bowls.

"We're all packed. But the X-Box stays," She said sassily, and Leonard pretended to pout.

"Well, it's only for two days. I think I can manage," He laughed, and Penny rolled her eyes.

The building manager had sent each tenant a notice last week that this weekend they were tenting the building for termite infestation. Penny figured if they had to stay at a hotel, they might as well get one on the beach so they could make it more enjoyable.

Penny scooped some ice cream into a bowl, carrying it and a plate with cake for Leonard over to the coffee table.

"By the way, how is Sheldon taking this?" Penny asked, setting the goodies down on the coffee table.

Leonard snorted.

"Well…on the surface, he seems fine with it. But I can tell that inside he is scared to death that he will staying the entire weekend at Amy's," He said, and Penny nodded thoughtfully.

"Yeah, I get the feeling Amy feels the same way. She wasn't her normally chipper self when she mentioned it, like she couldn't wait to play house. It's odd, since he stayed with her after she came home from the hospital. I don't know why she would be worried about it. She was kind of quiet on the subject. I think she thought I would tease her." Penny said.

Leonard shoved a bite of cake into his mouth, making a face.

"That's because you probably would," He chuckled.

Penny thought about it, shrugging.

"Yeah, I guess. But it's weird. It's almost like…" She trailed off, suddenly feeling guilty.

Leonard stopped chewing and stared at her.

"What?"

Penny shrugged again, putting her bowl on the table.

"It's almost like they have turned a corner in their relationship. It's become…sacred. Deeper somehow. Haven't you noticed the way they've been looking at each other since Amy got sick? It's like you can cut the sexual tension around them with a knife."

Leonard thought about it more in depth.

"Yeah… I guess you're right. A couple of weeks ago after we won the Comic Con tickets, the guys were teasing Sheldon about the change with him and Amy. He was clearly unprepared to talk about it. I think something has happened between them and he is unable to process it, let alone talk about it with us."

Penny pursed her lips.

"It's not like Amy not to tell me; she usually comes to me with everything Sheldon related," Penny said, and Leonard raised his brows.

"Sounds like something serious is going on between them. Maybe she's just respecting Sheldon's privacy."

Penny nodded, agreeing with him.

"You're probably right. Maybe you should have a talk with him, Leonard. Find out if he's okay or if he has any questions. I know we all tease him about his lack of experience, but truthfully, it must be scary for him to come to grips with all these changes happening between them. And I doubt he'd willingly come to you for advice. You know how proud he is."

Leonard sat back and thought about Penny's words. She was right; Sheldon _had_ been acting strangely lately. Ever since he and Penny had come back from their Palm Springs weekend, in fact. Sheldon seemed…different, somehow. Sometimes, he'd catch Sheldon staring into space for no reason. And whenever he and Amy were in the same room, the electricity between them was palpable.

Leonard had also noticed how Sheldon looked at Amy more frequently. And the _way_ he looked at her, when he thought no one was watching…It was strange seeing his formerly robotic friend gazing at his girlfriend like he wanted to ravish her.

He doubted that the couple had engaged in sex, but it was clear _something_ had happened. He decided to have a talk with Sheldon and let him know that he was there for him, if he needed it.

"I think Sheldon is finally growing up. He would probably deny that he's changed, but it's clear that he has. And that is entirely due to his feelings for Amy. She completes him, in so many ways. I think he's scared to admit that to himself. But his psyche can't escape the facts. My mother would have a field day with his neural scans," Leonard said, and Penny laughed at that picture in her head. "Although…I'm not extending an invitation to her so don't get any ideas."

Penny narrowed her eyes at her fiancé playfully.

"Hey, she's _your _mother. You should be able to keep her in line." Penny snarked, throwing her arm around Leonard's shoulder.

"Yeah…I know. But we all know how well that would go. Just don't tell Amy my mother kissed Sheldon once, whatever you do."

Penny nodded, swallowing a spoonful of ice cream.

"Agreed."

"Although…my mother would be _very_ interested to know just how much Sheldon has changed since meeting Amy. They could have a professional discussion on all of Sheldon's quirks, one Neuroscientist to another," Leonard said, snorting.

"I know. He _has_ changed. The other day I caught him reading poetry online. It was bizarre. He went to his room to get something, and I happened to glance over at his laptop. I almost spit my wine out all over the desk." Penny said.

Leonard laughed, shaking his head.

"Well, whatever is happening, it's certainly snowballing. It's like a flick has been switched since Amy recovered."

At that moment, Sheldon came into the apartment, throwing his keys into the bowl. He made it two paces into the room before meeting Leonard and Penny's concerned gazes.

"Hel-lo…" He drawled slowly, stopping in his tracks. Penny stood, taking her bowl to the sink.

"I'm going to go, Leonard. I wanted to do that…thing. Before we leave tomorrow."

Leonard nodded vigorously.

"Oh, yeah. The…thing. Alright." He said, walking Penny to the door before kissing her.

Sheldon stared at the couple peculiarly, knowing something was definitely up. His eyes watched Penny as she left the apartment, before his gaze swung back to his best friend.

"I know the _thing_ Penny is talking about isn't cleaning, so that leads me to believe you both were talking about me somehow," Sheldon said forthrightly.

Leonard returned to the couch, swallowing the last bit of his cake. He beckoned Sheldon to have a seat. Sheldon stared at him a moment, perplexed, but nevertheless he sat down in his spot.

"Sheldon…I wanted to make sure that you were alright. I know that things with Amy have been more…intense…than what you are used to lately. If you have any questions or concerns, I hope you know I am here for you, buddy."

Leonard was sincere, and Sheldon appreciated that. But he still remembered their talk on prom night, and felt it was time to address something that had bothered him for months.

"Leonard…you are my best friend and I appreciate you more than you know. Your help and guidance has always been very helpful. But I need to know something. Will you be honest with me?" Sheldon asked him, and Leonard frowned.

"Of course, Sheldon. Always. What is it?"

Sheldon took in a gulp of air and blew it out.

"On prom night last year, you said you didn't think I have hormones. Did you mean that? Is that how you, Penny, and everyone else sees me? As some…machine?"

Leonard was stunned not only by Sheldon's question, but by the hurt tone behind it. He wanted to say something funny to lighten the mood, but one look at Sheldon's face told him that he was quite serious in his inquiry. Leonard felt guilty all of a sudden.

"Sheldon…no. We don't think that. But you have to admit- over the years, you didn't place a huge emphasis on emotions. Or romance, for that matter. We're all thrilled that you have found happiness, and with such a great woman. We love Amy and want nothing but the best for you both. I don't think you are a machine. You've proven to everyone that you have a great capacity for love inside. You're just not accustomed to letting it out. I understand, I do. I know you have hormones, Sheldon. I'm very sorry if I hurt your feelings. I never meant to. That night, you were very nervous about standard prom rituals. I was just trying to put your mind at ease."

Sheldon lowered his gaze, nodding his head.

"I know that, Leonard. Thank you. It's just…I know I was a terrible boyfriend to Amy all of these years. I wish I could make up for so many of the things I've done and said. But I _do_ have feelings. And I'm trying to express them more because…she deserves that much. More than that. She deserves everything." Sheldon said with feeling, chewing on his lip. Leonard nodded at his friend, trying to be supportive.

"And…these feelings? Are you able to cope with them alright? Are you confused in any way, or do you need some advice? I promise…no teasing. I only want to help."

Sheldon smiled at his friend. He knew without a doubt that Leonard was being sincere. Perhaps, he could share with him what had occurred with Amy.

"The weekend you went to Palm Springs…I asked Amy over for dinner on the Friday night. While she was here, I asked her to spend the night. With me. In my bed." Sheldon stated, licking his lips and gulping.

Leonard's mouth dropped open so fast, you would think the hinge came loose. He closed it quickly enough, but Sheldon saw the shock that had crossed his friend's features.

"And…did she?" Leonard ventured, already knowing the answer when Sheldon blushed. But Sheldon nodded his head in the affirmative, anyway.

"Yes. She did."

"Oh. Well…that's um…wow." Leonard stuttered, assuming something entirely different. Sheldon shook his head.

"No, it wasn't like…that. We didn't engage in sex. But…we shared an intimate evening, nevertheless. We chatted all night, and I… I found 'second base', as you call it. Amy enjoyed it. _Really, really…_ enjoyed it." Sheldon stammered out, shyly averting his eyes. He felt bad, like he was compromising his Amy in some way by discussing their private time with Leonard.

Leonard was on the edge of his seat, staring at his friend in awe as what Sheldon was implying became clear.

"Oh! I see," Leonard said, a calm tone coloring his fatherly voice. Sheldon's words painted a pretty clear picture of what they'd done. "Say no more. I understand. And…good for you, buddy." Leonard praised, making Sheldon feel a sense of relief that he didn't need to elaborate.

Sheldon nodded, meeting Leonard's gaze hesitantly.

"She wanted to…reciprocate. But…I wasn't ready. Does that mean that something is wrong with me?" Sheldon asked fearfully, and Leonard's heart actually hurt for his friend. He swallowed, forcing back the lump in his throat at the sadness on Sheldon's face.

"No, buddy. Not at all. There is nothing wrong with you because you are not ready to do…that. It's a big step. Especially for you, since you've never shared that with anyone before. I'm positive that Amy understands." He said kindly, making Sheldon feel somewhat better.

"She does," He whispered, remembering gratefully how sweet Amy was that night. She didn't push him or make him feel pressured in any way. He loved her all the more for it.

Leonard narrowed his eyes, studying his friend.

"Sheldon? I know this is personal, but…are you sure that Amy is the one you want to share this with? I'm just curious if the reason your holding back is because you aren't positive."

Sheldon knew Leonard was only being thorough in his assessment of offering him advice. But he vehemently shook his head at Leonard's question.

"I'm…positive, Leonard. I love her. More than anything. It's not Amy nor my feelings for her that are holding me back. It's that I'm…" He chewed his lip again, unsure how to voice what he knew was a major shortcoming.

Leonard smiled softly at the man who had become like a brother to him.

"Afraid of showing that private side of yourself?" He tried gently, and Sheldon stared at him with wide eyes.

"Yes," He whispered, so happy to let it out. "It's such a private matter. And…I've never felt these feelings before. It's overwhelming. My body knows I will enjoy it. My heart does, as well. But my mind…my mind keeps throwing these roadblocks in my way. It's…exhausting," He admitted.

The moments ticked by, neither man saying anything. Finally, Leonard reached out and placed his hand on Sheldon's shoulder in comfort.

"Sheldon, listen to me. I know it seems scary. It _is_ scary. But in reality? There is nothing to fear. You'll see, when you're ready to see. There is something beautiful and fulfilling about sharing yourself with the one you love. The fear somehow falls away. Just…be patient with yourself. And remember that you're not alone. Amy is right there with you, probably fearing the same things you are."

Sheldon knew Leonard was right. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you, Leonard. You've been very helpful." He offered, rising to go to his room.

Leonard smiled at his friend gently.

"Anytime, buddy. And don't worry. This conversation is just between us. Okay?"

That, more than anything, put Sheldon's mind at ease. He nodded at his best friend, grateful for his tact.

"Thank you, Leonard."

Making his way back to his room, he sat on the bed and pondered what Leonard had said. He was right; when he was ready, it would happen. And he_ did_ want it to happen. Deep down, he knew it was just a matter of time.

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Amy was nervous.

Scratch that. Amy was terrified.

The last few weeks with Sheldon had been wonderful. They saw each other more, skyped more, texted more. She was certain Sheldon would get annoyed at their increasing conversing, but often he himself was the one to initiate it.

Looking back, she never would have guessed that he was the same man who wanted to keep her at arms- length for so long. Most notably, only wanting to see her once monthly for date night. They'd come so far over the last year, ever since he returned from his train trip. And while she knew they had made great progress, something told her that they weren't home free yet.

He was trying so hard, bless him. When she woke up in the hospital, seeing his dear face and hearing his words of remorse, she knew they had been given a second chance. She knew the road to intimacy would be fraught with pitfalls. But she loved him so much that she knew she had to put on her hardhat and push through. Things had only gotten better since then, so she was trying to remain calm.

Now, he was going to be spending the weekend at her place, while his apartment building was treated for termites. She shouldn't have been terrified as she stood in her bedroom, staring at the bed they were going to share. But she was.

When he mentioned his plight to her last week, she casually asked him if he would like to stay at her place, rather than spend money on a hotel as Leonard and Penny were opting to do. She completely expected him to balk at the idea, or make some remark about how they weren't at that stage in the relationship yet, even though she had spent the night with him that Friday that Leonard and Penny went to Palm Springs.

He cautiously asked her, as she did with him, what their sleeping arrangements would be. Amy explained that she had a king sized bed, with plenty of room, and that he could trust her to be a lady. After only a few minutes of internal debate, Sheldon graciously accepted her offer, thanking her for her kindness and generosity.

Now, she stared at her king sized waterbed, her nerves tearing her neural pathways to shreds.

It wasn't like they would be 'sleeping' together.

It was only…_sleeping_…together. Two adults, who were in a committed relationship, and who were both not ready to engage in _that_ level of intimacy.

She offered to sleep on the couch if he were uncomfortable with the arrangement, and let Sheldon have the bed since he was 6'2 and he wouldn't be able to stretch out. He already suffered spending 6 painful nights folded onto her couch when she came home from the hospital. He vehemently refused to let her spend two nights on a small sofa. Her mouth dropped open at his insistence, and she was happy they were on the phone and not skype.

"Amy, we are a grown couple in a mature relationship. We can certainly share two nights in a bed together without any awkwardness. I know we are both used to sleeping alone, but I assure you- I am nothing if not a gentleman, and I promise to behave. As long as you do the same," He said, a cheekiness she had never heard before from him coloring his words immensely.

Amy blushed as she remembered Sheldon's hands bringing her pleasure that night in his bed. He promised to behave that night, as well. A shy smile crossed her lips.

"Oh, I promise Dr. Cooper. You have nothing to worry about." She said sweetly, loving the fact they had reached this point in their relationship…Yet terrified that it was becoming a reality very fast, very soon.

He was scheduled to arrive in five minutes time, and she made a final once over that everything was perfect.

Clean sheets – check.

Nightlight in bathroom – check.

Extra towels – check.

Cereal and milk for Saturday breakfast – check.

Everything was in order, and yet her insides were churning.

_Knock-Knock - Amy_

_Knock-Knock - Amy_

_Knock-Knock - Amy_

Here we go, she sighed.

She opened the door with a flourish, and Sheldon stood on the threshold with a bag in his hand and his wheel suitcase beside him. He met her eyes, staring at her intently before saying hello. Amy waited patiently as his eyes roamed over her face.

"Good evening, Amy. May I come in?" He asked politely, and Amy smiled softly.

"Of course, Sheldon, please…make yourself at home," She said kindly, stepping back to allow him entrance. He walked in, depositing his bag on the chair by the door and the wheel case next to it. He turned to her, his face an anxious mask.

"Thank you again for letting me stay with you this weekend- I can still go to a local hotel if you would be more comfortable," He suggested, the look on his face heartbreakingly worried. Amy grimaced as she sat down, motioning for him to join her.

"Don't be silly, Sheldon. I am perfectly happy to have you here. Unless of course, _you_ would be more comfortable at a hotel," She offered, noting how his brows furrowed.

She hated the fact they were still so guarded around each other, and she hoped this weekend would go a ways toward closing that rift. She was more than willing to do her part. After a moment, Sheldon smiled tentatively, and to Amy's surprise, moved closer to her on the sofa.

"No, Amy. I would like to stay here with you very much. I suppose it will take me a bit of time to adapt to my new surroundings. But I'm perfectly alright with it. I promise to do my best not to make myself a burden."

Sheldon winced at the vulnerable tone of his voice, but Amy found his disarmed demeanor endearing.

Amy smiled at her boyfriend, her heart squeezing painfully from the love she felt for him. She stared at him for endless minutes, trying to convey that love, extend it so that it moved from her being into his and surrounded him in its warmth.

His face betrayed no comprehension however; he simply sat there, his wondrous eyes mapping her face and watching her every move. What does he see when he looks at me? She wondered. A besotted fool, no doubt. She sighed, reaching over to gracefully touch his hand. His eyes hesitantly left her face to follow the path of her touch.

"You are _never_ a burden to me, Sheldon." She said tenderly, patting his hand for good measure. He could only nod, not daring to meet her eyes. She was too good to him. And too good_ for_ him. He hoped he would never let her down again, but he feared he would somehow.

"Are you ready for dinner?" She asked, and he shook his head in the affirmative.

"I'll just go wash up," He muttered, unhappy to move her hand from his. Amy watched him escape to the bathroom, feeling that while awkward, their first encounter of the night left them relatively unscathed.

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They sat on the couch watching Man of Steel after dinner, Amy leaning into Sheldon's shoulder. He was distracted, to say the least. So much had happened in the last few weeks that even his perfect, analytical mind was having trouble catching up. He felt disjointed, and he hated feeling that way.

Amy seemed oblivious to his musings, though. She stretched out, getting up to get a drink. Sheldon sat up, pausing the movie for her.

"Oh, it's fine. I'll be right back. No need to pause the film. Would you like a drink?" She asked him, and he nodded.

"Water, please."

Amy grabbed a bottle of water for him and a tea for herself, returning to the sofa promptly. She offered him the bottle, and he took it slowly.

"Thank you," He whispered, opening it and taking a huge gulp. Amy tried not to let on how nervous she knew he was.

The movie ended and Sheldon sat where he was, watching as Amy removed the disc from her DVD player before she tidied up.

"I wonder how Leonard and Penny are doing," She said lightly, and Sheldon blew out a gust of air.

"No doubt rolling around on their hotel room bed, making the other inhabitants of the establishment wonder if a 7.5 earthquake just occurred," He said dryly, sounding entirely _not_ like the Sheldon she knew.

The words were out of his mouth so quickly, that he didn't have time to censor them. He turned slowly, afraid to meet Amy's gaze.

She was staring at him incredulously, her mouth hanging open in shock. It was not like Sheldon to say such unguarded things when it came to the topic of sex, especially about his friends. While he ribbed them often about their more than healthy sex life, discussing it frankly was something he would not normally do. _Especially_ not with Amy. The picture his words painted were erotic and most likely true, adding to his discomfort and Amy's intrigue.

Sheldon felt the air in the room suddenly rise to a warm level, and he tugged on his collar.

"I'm sorry, Amy. That was a rude and callous thing for me to say. Forgive my vulgarity." He whispered.

She, in turn, instantly conjured up a picture of herself and Sheldon engaging in the same erotic pose. The thought of 'rolling around on a bed' with Sheldon made Amy's entire body hum with something primal. The fact they would be sharing a bed for the next two nights didn't help the situation.

"That's alright, Sheldon. No big deal." She downplayed, getting up and standing before him. His eyes followed her, and he gulped.

"I think I'm tired and would like to turn in. Are you ready for bed, or would you like to stay here and watch some more television? Help yourself to anything in the fridge, as well."

Sheldon debated in his mind. He wasn't tired, far from it. But he also had no desire to sit out here alone while she slept in the next room. He supposed that by the time his evening ablutions were complete, he would be ready for REM sleep. Decision made, he stood up.

"I shall join you for bed," He said resolutely, and the words rattled around Amy's head.

_Join you. For bed…_

"Okay," She said meekly, turning off the light and picking up Sheldon's bag, allowing him to carry his wheel case.

Getting ready for bed that night was as awkward as it could get. She allowed him to go first in the bathroom, while she pulled out her nightclothes and turned down the bed. She eyed the mattress temperature; it was 75 degrees, perfect for herself, but she wasn't sure if Sheldon would be comfortable enough. He liked things on the cooler side, but this was a waterbed. She figured she would play it by ear. If he were warm, he would more than likely tell her.

When he emerged from the bathroom, he was dressed in his favorite pair of pajamas and robe. Navy and green plaid, with a white undershirt beneath. She smiled at him warmly, and he returned her smile with a tentative one of his own.

"Bathroom is all yours, Amy."

She nodded, skirting past him carrying her own clothing. Once inside, she stared at herself in the mirror. Her eyes were bright and wide, her lips plump from her constant biting, and her face flushed. Sheldon's earlier comments about Leonard and Penny still rang in her ears.

She could never have imagined Sheldon saying something so…_normal_… concerning sex. It was a total shock, hearing those naughty words out of his mouth, but she had to admit, it was a total turn on. She wondered what other proclivities he was hiding inside his brain.

Sighing heavily, she began to pull off her clothing and jumped in the shower. After fifteen minutes, she opened the door to her bedroom to find Sheldon sitting up in her bed, legs crossed, staring at the wall ahead. He had discarded his robe and even the top of his pajama set, leaving on the pants and t shirt remaining.

She didn't want to wear something too provocative, yet she didn't want to wear her normal attire of her grandmother's hand me down nightie. She decided to wear a pretty pair of ladies silk pajamas in blush pink. They outlined her body so much more than her street clothes did, but she decided that couldn't be helped. It was bedtime, and she wanted to be comfortable.

Sheldon watched her as she moved from the door to the bed, his eyes taking in every motion she made. She looked small and feminine in those silky things, and he held his breath for a fraction. He could do this. He could do this. They were just sleeping. Nothing more. Relax, Sheldon. Relax. Just sleep. Nothing more. She shut off the light, and the darkness helped him to calm down a bit.

"What side would you like?" She asked sweetly, and he simply shook his head.

"I…it doesn't matter, remember?" He answered, his thoughts a whirl.

Amy shrugged, sliding in and angling herself to a sitting up position on the right side. After a few minutes, Sheldon tossed and turned and swatted his pillow, trying to reach a level of comfort suitable to him. This was hopeless. At home, his bed didn't rock like a boat. At home, he had one pillow, not three, and as the thought entered his mind, he turned and scowled at Amy's abundance of pillows, wanting to chuck two of them to the floor. He figured that would be rude, so he punched the pillows again for effect.

"Sheldon, would you please be still? I feel like I'm on the viper coaster at Six Flags." Amy said in amusement, but that only made Sheldon more anxious. He huffed and puffed, trying to get comfortable.

"I'm sorry, Amy. I'm just used to sleeping in the middle of the bed. Not to mention, you have an unusual amount of pillows adorning your bed. Is it alright if I only sleep with one pillow?" He asked, trying to be as polite as possible. He'd never achieve sufficient REM sleep this way.

Amy sat up further, peering at him in the darkness.

"Of course, if you wish. But you _could_ move to the center, there is plenty of room. I wouldn't mind if you encroached on my space a little," She said, more out of concern for his comfort than as a seduction tool. Sheldon automatically rolled his eyes anyway.

"If I moved to the center, I may end up touching you," He said matter- of- fact, earning a hurt glare from Amy. Even in the semi darkness, he could tell by her face she was not happy by his caustic remark. His eyes widened at his faux pas, and he tried to backpedal.

"Oh…what I…what I meant was-"

But it was too late. Amy bit her lip, rolling over so Sheldon didn't have to see how upset his words made her.

"Yes, touching me would be a fate worse than death. I know. You know what? Just do what makes you happy. Goodnight, Sheldon." She said, hurt evident in her voice. Tears began to form in her eyes. Would she ever stop feeling so vulnerable around him? Perhaps asking him to stay with her this weekend was a hasty decision. She scooted over as far as she could to the edge without falling over, praying sleep would come quickly.

Sheldon leaned up on his elbow, watching her quiet form. What the hell did he say that for? It wasn't at all what he meant. He simply felt that he wanted _her_ to be comfortable, as well, and 'encroaching on her space' as she put it, might be uncomfortable for her. Why could he never get it right with her? Oh dear…this was off to a bad start already. Their first night together in the same bed, and it was already a disaster of his own making. She had been nothing but sweet and caring all evening. And she tried to make him as comfortable as possible, even if it caused her routine to be changed. He felt like a world class cad.

"Amy?" He whispered, the syllables blaring in the otherwise quiet room.

"Go to sleep, Sheldon." She said quietly, her voice quivering. Clearly, she had had enough of him for one day. The thought pierced his heart and left him in a panic.

The truth was, he wanted nothing more than to touch her. Hold her. Do…other things. He sighed heavily, and lay back down, this time closer to her than before. Either she was oblivious to this, or she didn't care. And the thought that she didn't care made Sheldon crazy.

Turning, he reached his arm over, and secured it around his girlfriend. The feeling was amazing; the simple act of touching her. Tentatively, he scooted over until he was spooning her, his knees behind hers, and his arm sliding around under her pillow. The room was silent other than the steady hum of the air conditioner.

"What are you doing?" Amy exhaled, fear and longing and joy and incredulity and hope in her soft voice. She dared not breathe, as Sheldon relaxed his muscles and pulled her tightly to his chest. Her eyes fluttered closed of their own accord as he gently caressed her midsection with his hand.

"You told me to do what makes me happy. I'm doing what makes me happy," He murmured, sliding the arm caressing her around to her hip. "Is this alright?" He asked, so carefully, so fearfully, that it made Amy's eyes water further.

"More than alright," She whispered.

He smiled, burying his face in her apple scented hair. He loved the scent of her hair, loved the silkiness of it, and the length. In his secret dreams, he imagined her hair falling around him as they-…

Stopping that train of thought abruptly as it began, he cleared his throat.

"I meant no disrespect, with what I said. I just didn't string my words together correctly. I didn't know if you were particular about being touched while sleeping. I myself have no frame of reference, but I was only trying to consider your feelings on the matter. That is all I meant." He said softly, his warm breath tickling the back of her neck. The way it made Amy's flesh break out in gooseflesh delighted Sheldon. A small sigh escaped her mouth, but she made no further comments.

Sheldon kissed the back of her head three times, before leaning down and placing a tender kiss on her neck. Amy shivered in the darkness and leaned back into his embrace.

Strangely enough, even with the woman of his dreams lying so close to him and his heart pounding mercilessly…sleep found Sheldon that night sooner than later.

A/N- Thank you for reading.


	26. Chapter 26

~Chapter 26~

A/N- You all are the bomb! I am so pleased that the most talked about topic of last chapter was Sheldon and Leonard's heart to heart. They are really good together, aren't they? Back on the Shamy front, our favorite couple is moving into some seriously unchartered territory. Let's see if we can draw them a map, shall we?

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Back and forth across the sea- I have chased so many dreams. I have never felt the grace- That I have felt in your embrace. Oh, I was tired and I was cold- Yeah, with a hunger in my soul. When it almost seemed too much- I see your face and sense the grace and feel the magic of your touch. Oh, lay your hands…lay your hands on me…" Thompson Twins - Lay Your Hands on Me ~ Part 2

Sheldon was up before Amy, which was no surprise. As it was ingrained in him, his eyes opened before his scheduled wake up time. A glance at the bedside clock read 6:40 am. Perfect.

Doctor Who was on at 7:00am, after all.

Not one to deviate from his usual schedule just because he wasn't at home, he planned on showering, eating his customary bowl of cereal, and sitting down to watch the latest episode of the Doctor's exploits.

That was before he opened his eyes, remembering where he was, and who was beside him.

He hadn't meant to upset Amy last night; far from it. He knew he hurt her feelings with his thoughtless remark. But whereas in the past, he might have actually meant such a statement, this time, it was said with no malice intended.

She was very kind in offering him to stay with her for the weekend. He supposed that had it been any other couple, it wouldn't even have been an issue. But they weren't any other couple. Spending 48 hours in each other's company exclusively, without the need for nursing or care, was a huge step for them. He was annoyed at himself for almost ruining the weekend before it had even begun.

After he cuddled against Amy, drawing her close, Sheldon had slept like the dead. Cocooned in Amy's warmth, he realized upon awakening that they were in the same position as they were when they fell asleep, with one exception.

One rather large, _annoying_ exception.

Sheldon swallowed, blowing out a tiny tuft of air that stirred Amy's hair. And good lord….did it smell nice this morning. Warm and fragrant, tickling his nose and chin. Rather than pulling away, he found himself snuggling closer, his arms which were around her moving without his consent further up her torso. He felt something soft and warm greet his fingers. Realizing too late it was her breast, Sheldon froze.

'_Oh, God'_…He thought in abject terror. Aided by the silk of her top, his hand slid over the mound as gentle as a breeze. Part of him felt so guilty for touching her this way, without her consent and without her knowledge. But the covertness of his actions allowed him to focus on her, and the feel of her.

More importantly, what it was doing to_ him_.

Her nipple tightened, and the way it contracted under his fingers made his flesh harden further. Amy was so responsive to his touch, even in her sleep, and the fact he could evoke these sensations from her made him lose his breath. He caressed her gently, finding it fascinating how her body arched itself against his.

This was quickly spiraling out of control. He had to stop now, while he still could and remain a gentleman.

He shook his head, certain he was in an alternate universe. Wherever these thoughts were coming from lately, he had no idea. Only they weren't only thoughts anymore. They were actions. And that scared him to death.

Glancing down at what nature had caused, then back to his sleeping girlfriend, he realized a cold shower would be the first order of business this day. He seemed to be spending a lot of time showering these days. Reluctantly, he untangled his limbs from hers.

He hated how his predicament made him feel like a pervert. It was natural, after all, to be aroused, especially by your girlfriend. There was nothing for him to be embarrassed or ashamed about. The fact he woke up next to her soft body which smelled wonderful, only added to his arousal. Yet his strict religious upbringing and his self - imposed chastity kept harboring on the edges of his psyche. He felt defective and lost, and wondered if he would ever simply give in to this driving need inside of him.

Could he?

Until meeting Amy, and embarking on this intimate relationship journey with her, he had never endured such physical torture. No woman had ever 'stirred his loins', so to speak, with the exception of Wonder Woman or possibly Raven. He understood these were female comic heroes, but still. The very real fact that a living, breathing, flesh and blood female was eliciting such responses in him was frightening and exhilarating. The knowledge she was attracted to him and found him suitable for mating was even more surreal. Perhaps there had been women in his past who were attracted to him, but that was of no consequence to him. He never realized it, and furthermore, wouldn't have cared either way.

But now…

Watching Amy sleep in that big bed, his scent all over her from their intimate entwinement last night…he felt his erection stir to epic proportions and his breathing accelerate. It wasn't a new feeling; ever since last Valentine's Day and their fateful kiss, Sheldon had been cognizant of an ever growing attraction for his girlfriend. Every look, every casual touch, and every word they spoke to one another…was like a meticulously choreographed dance. Push, pull, give, take, back, forth, forward, retreat.

If he were worldly (and he was not), he would have realized that this _dance_ they were performing was a precursor to sexual intercourse. They were dancing on the edge of a high mountain, moving closer and closer to falling over.

The events of the last two months didn't discourage it, either. After their wedding date, and the kiss that followed…it was like the pieces of a ten thousand piece jigsaw puzzle were falling into place, each piece floating in the partner piece without any effort at all. Even work had been going well, as he was making leaps and bounds in his research. The fact Dr. Gablehauser stopped by his office to commend him on his latest paper was testimony to that. Everything was going so well for Sheldon.

Almost too well.

Was this what Leonard meant last year, when he tried to purchase that table? Was Amy's influence so positive that he had, in fact, changed? Grown? Sheldon had always assumed he liked himself the way he was. But of course, he knew nothing else. Now, the entire game field was different. He had friends. Good, solid, loving friends. A career that was flourishing, and a woman in his life who was supportive, beautiful, caring, and completely right for him.

Amy herself had changed over the last three years, Sheldon realized.

Her tone of voice was softer, gentler…less robotic. Her clothing more feminine. Her hair shinier. Her face, rosier. Everything about her was more aesthetically pleasing. She was no pushover, though. That was for sure. And he had learned sooner than later that she can be tenacious and cunning. Yet for all of her ploys, she never tricked him or made him feel less than the man he was. She never put him in a situation that made him uncomfortable. She was and quickly had become a fantasy come alive for him. Where before he could simply go on without her, he now knew that was no longer an option. He needed her presence like he needed air. Like he needed routine, and like he needed order.

With that final thought, he turned and left her to her dreams.

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Amy awoke to a cold and empty bed, the sounds of British TV wafting in through the crack in the door. She reached for her glasses on the nightstand, spying it was 7:45. She didn't have to wonder where Sheldon was; it was Saturday morning and it was past 7. That only meant one thing.

Doctor Who.

Swinging her legs out from under her, Amy sat up gingerly and tried to gather her thoughts. She slept so soundly, no doubt aided by Sheldon's warmth. She could have sworn that he held her the entire night, but as the last vestiges of lucidity fell away, she couldn't have been sure. A strange feeling welled up inside of her, as something nagged at her. She could have sworn this morning that Sheldon had caressed her…somewhere. She couldn't be sure, as she was dreaming of him as it was last night. But she was certain she felt his hands upon her.

That's impossible, she decided. He would never touch her, especially without her knowledge. It was just not Sheldon. I'm being silly. Wishful thinking, she pouted, and went into the bathroom to brush her teeth and wash her face.

She was staring thoughtfully into space, remembering last night's events. Deep down, she knew Sheldon meant no harm by his statement. Hearing it, though, catapulted her back to their earlier days, when he never took her feelings into consideration. She never realized how deeply he had hurt her, then. Part of her knew, at the time, that it was his defense mechanism. The other part knew it was just Sheldon, and the way his brain was trained to react. When Sheldon cuddled her last night, she felt much better knowing he had truly changed. The Sheldon of old would _never_ have done that. Who was she kidding? The Sheldon of old would never have realized he hurt her feelings to begin with!

Even though she fell in love with that Sheldon, she was eager to move forward with a Sheldon who wasn't afraid to show his love for her. And she was more than ready to show her love toward him.

She found Sheldon sitting on the sofa in his robe, cereal bowl in his palm and intently staring at the TV. She didn't want to disturb him, so she quietly went in to the kitchen, fixing herself a bowl of cereal for herself and starting her coffee pot.

Sheldon heard her arrival, of course, but couldn't bring himself to look at her. Not after pawing her like a bear earlier. His breathing quickened as he remembered the feeling of her breast in his hand, the way her nipple swelled at his touch…

Sweat began to form on his brow. Even after a very long shower session in which he was forced to …take matters into his own hands – he still felt guilty and unsure of how to proceed. Amy was brilliant. She would be able to see through him and _that_ was the part he was dreading.

"Good morning, Sheldon. I hope you slept well?" Amy inquired, coming to join him on the sofa. She had put her hair up in a high ponytail, the long tendrils falling across her collarbone quite becomingly. She looked disheveled and sleepy.

So why then did Sheldon feel desire swirl in his stomach? He frowned and looked back to the TV.

"Good morning, Amy. I slept well. Thank you. I was perhaps a little warm, though." He admitted, not wanting to sound ungrateful.

Amy narrowed her eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I made sure the A/C was on 71 degrees, as you like it. Perhaps the temperature of the bed was too warm. I'll adjust it later, if you prefer."

Sheldon nodded, still staring at the TV. The Doctor was repairing the Tardis and there were pieces of it everywhere. What was he thinking? There was only 10 minutes left of the episode. He'll never fix it in time.

"Thank you, Amy," He said quietly, worrying that the warmth he was experiencing had nothing to do with the temperature of the room, or the bed, but was largely due to her nearness…and the mounting desire inside of him to throw her down _on_ that bed and take what was his. He wanted to rip off those silky pajamas and take her within an inch of her life, marking her as his forever. Ice shot up through his spine, as fire drove down to his manhood at his feral thoughts.

"Dear God," He lamented quietly, scrubbing one hand across his face while simultaneously putting the bowl on the table with the other. Amy noticed the loud thump of the bowl, and turned her attention to Sheldon in concern.

"Sheldon, are you alright?" She asked, sitting on the edge of the sofa on alert. He looked anything but alright, and she felt panicked that something she did set him off. She had no idea what that could be, since she just awoke ten minutes ago.

Sheldon rocked back against the back of the sofa, his hand still splayed across his face to hide his shame. He felt his groin begin to stir; just her sitting next to him smelling like that was making him crazy. She obviously hadn't showered yet, and he could smell himself all over her; from his laundry soap on her clothing to the talc he used. Just how close _were_ they spooning last night? A low groan escaped his lips, and he tried to take a deep breath. He couldn't muster enough air into his lungs.

Amy, for her part, was baffled at his demeanor. Sheldon was never a bag of nerves or so rattled. He was literally pressed into the back of the couch, shaking like a leaf. Surely, something must have happened to upset his equilibrium so. Tentatively, she placed her hand on his knee.

Bad idea, she soon found out.

In an instant, Sheldon grabbed her hand, squeezing it tightly, looking at her with wild, unfocused eyes. Amy caught her breath, not entirely frightened of Sheldon, but the look in his eyes and the strength of his grip was not that of _her_ Sheldon. His breath escaped in small pants, lips moving but no words forming. She sat there, transfixed, as a very real battle waged itself inside of her boyfriend's mind. Finally, coming to his senses, Sheldon loosened his grasp and placed her hand on her own knee.

"Please…don't touch me like that. I'm not myself right now, and I don't want to do something…" He trailed off, his voice high and strained. He looked at her beseechingly, and Amy's eyes widened.

Oh.

So _that_ was it. Her indifferent boyfriend was suddenly not so immune to her.

He turned back to the now forgotten and finished Doctor Who, his mind racing at breakneck speed. He didn't know what to do, with Amy so close. He should get dressed and go take a walk. However, the thought of walking the streets of Glendale with an erection didn't seem like the best course of action. Maybe another cold shower. Then the ultimate of evil thoughts flashed through his mind.

_Allow her to help you with that problem that keeps popping up._

He closed his eyes again as a wave of nausea hit. His mind drifted to a myriad of scenarios, each one more erotic than the last.

Her touching him with her soft hands.

Her mouth engulfing him with its plush warmth.

Her snug womanhood gripping him with it's hot-

He jumped off the couch, pacing the room like a madman. Jesus Christ…what was_ happening_ inside his head? He wondered in a panic.

Amy sat still, watching him, her body glued to the couch. When he stopped his pacing abruptly and fixed her with a desperate look, she actually gulped.

"Amy, please…would you do something for me?" He asked, his voice cracking. Finding it impossible to answer him, Amy nodded.

"Would you go take a shower and get dressed, so we can plan our day? I'm a little rattled today and I need to get out. Could you do that for me? Please?" He implored, his blue eyes burning into hers. Any desire she felt at his actions was quickly replaced by her love and concern for his well-being. He looked so afraid of himself in this moment, and her heart ached for him. She would do anything at all to ensure he was comfortable.

"Of course, Sheldon. I'll give you some time to yourself. Okay?" She asked softly, and he smiled faintly at her before turning to face the other wall. Amy walked into her room, shutting the door. She thought about locking it, but decided against it. She trusted Sheldon. Even if he didn't trust himself.

An hour later found Amy dressed in her usual attire; denim skirt with a floral top and a pretty, pink sweater. She left off her customary tights; it was warm out today and she wanted her legs bare. She peeked around the corner as she opened her door, to find Sheldon in the kitchen, cleaning up the breakfast dishes. He was fully dressed; he must have come into the bedroom at some point and took his clothing out of his case. The thought made her heart pound. Thank God she didn't lock the door; she had no idea what that would have done to Sheldon if he thought she didn't trust him. When she cleared her throat Sheldon turned around, and he looked marginally more relaxed than an hour ago.

"Hi," He whispered first, breaking the awkward silence.

"Hi," She repeated, careful not to disturb his new found peace.

"I was doing some thinking…earlier. I took a walk around the block. Do you know you have a nice little park at the end of the street? It has a carousel and some lovely benches to sit on…anyway, I was thinking, we could, if you are of a mind, go to the Griffith Conservatory today. Have you ever been there? It has a beautiful telescope. Rajesh took us once a few years ago, and it was thoroughly enjoyable. They have a fantastic planetarium. Is that something you'd enjoy?"

Amy smiled at his boyish ramblings, glad that whatever distress he had been under earlier had left him, at least temporarily.

"I know it's a fair drive, but is that alright?"

She wanted to put her hand on his, reassuringly. She thought back to earlier, and decided against it.

"Yes Sheldon. That sounds great. Shall we go?"

Sheldon let out the breath he had been holding. Thank god for Amy. She always knew how to make him feel better. He threw on his jacket that he had put by the door, and escorted her out of her apartment.

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The Griffith Observatory was situated on the slope of Mount Hollywood. It was one of the most beautiful places in all of the country, as far as Sheldon was concerned. It rendered amazing views of the city of Los Angeles, which he could appreciate.

Astrophysics were not his field, as they were Raj's. But as a Scientist, he could more than appreciate the role they played in the Universe. In essence, it _was_ the Universe.

He remembered the first time he came here, when he arrived in Pasadena. He came here alone, touring the facility and spending the day immersed in the stars. The second time, with Raj, Howard and Leonard, were due to Raj giving a lecture here on a paper he did. While he still had time to explore, the time was spent following them around more or less.

Now, here with Amy Farrah Fowler, Sheldon felt a level of giddiness that he never expected to feel. They toured each exhibit, laughing and acting like school children. They took in the show in the Samuel Oschin planetarium, sitting closer than close with their knees touching as they gazed at the stars floating above their heads. The narrator droned on about the cosmos, and the northern sky this time of year, and all things of great import. But all Amy could do was think about this morning, and how her boyfriend looked at her like she was his last meal.

For Sheldon, the afternoon was torture as he watched Amy constantly, trying to decipher just how and when these feelings for her had morphed into what he could only describe as a flame. It started out as warm coals, then grew into quiet embers, and now was threatening to incinerate him.

Sheldon drew a deep breath, the thoughts running through his mind leaving him dizzy. Amy glanced over to him, worrying about him. Sheldon sensed her eyes on him, and gently reached out, taking her hand in his. His hand was cool and soft, and Amy was glad that he wasn't upset about her touching him once again.

They spent the day on Mount Hollywood, until Amy suggested going down into the city and going to Carney's. Sheldon's eyes glittered like diamonds at her suggestion.

"Really? You want to go there? But I thought you hated hot dogs?" He said in a rush, and Amy laughed despite herself.

"I don't hate them. I just have to be in the mood for them. And I know how much you like Carney's, so they must be good. I have never been there, so I will reserve judgment until I try one."

Sheldon beamed at her, his brilliant cohort.

"Oh, Amy. You are in for a treat. I swear. They are delicious," He gushed, racing ahead of her to the car like a kid. Amy smiled following behind him.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So…anything of interest going on over at Casa De Fowler?" Penny asked cheekily. Amy blushed, even though Penny couldn't see.

"Well…maybe. It's been interesting." She said quietly.

This made Penny sit up and take notice.

"Interesting, huh? Explain, you little lump of wool."

"Hey. Don't call me that. I should never have told you that," Amy whined, her eyes seeking out Sheldon who was still on line for their food. He turned and sought her out, making sure she was still safe and sound at their secured table. She waved at him, and he waved back, his eyes lingering on her for a moment before turning back to wait.

"So…Interesting. Interesting good? Interesting creepy…" Penny trailed off, and Amy sighed.

"Interesting as in interesting. It's too early to say. But things are definitely different."

Which prompted another line of questioning from her inquisitive blond bestie.

"Different, as in-…"

"Look, things are 'good'. Okay? How are you and Leonard getting on at the beach?" She asked, quickly changing the focus off of her and Sheldon.

Penny laughed, and the breathy sound brought back last night's memory of Sheldon's words. Yeah…they were good.

"I figured as much. I'm glad you both had an opportunity to get away and spend some alone time, without Sheldon around. Privacy is good. "

Penny smiled. "Yeah, I know. But I'll tell you something weird. We actually miss Sheldon. Isn't that crazy? Maybe we are just going through Sheldon withdrawals," She said fearfully.

Amy could relate; time spent apart from Sheldon was never easy.

Sheldon turned and carried a tray laden with food, heading for the table. Amy quickly sat up.

"I have to go. Sheldon is coming."

Penny guffawed loudly.

"Ooh…now _that_ is a loaded statement," She drawled, making Amy gasp loudly.

"I'm out. Have a good night."

"Yeah, we will. You too…don't do anything we wouldn't do," Penny sassed, ending the call. Amy blushed, throwing her phone in her bag as Sheldon arrived at the table.

"How are Leonard and Penny?" He asked innocently, placing a tray on the table that had enough food to feed all of Pasadena. Amy gaped at the tray, her stomach rumbling despite herself.

"They're fine," She answered leaving out the part where they were doing exactly what Sheldon thought they were. "Wow, this looks appetizing."

Sheldon smiled widely, sitting down close to Amy, much closer than he normally did. In fact, he was practically on top of her.

"I thought we'd share everything, so that you can sample their best items," Sheldon said excitedly.

With his penchant for junk food and fast food, Amy wasn't sure how he maintained his lanky physique. There were a variety of hot dogs, from a New Yorker to a Chicagoan, chili burgers and regular burgers, fries, 3 different flavor shakes, and a lone salad, in case Amy wanted to be sensible. Amy laughed in delight as she noticed there were two straws for the drinks, as the thought dawned on her he really meant to share. And that meant drinking from the same cup. It was perhaps an oversight on his part, but Amy chose not to mention it. They dug in, attacking their food with vigor.

Perhaps the energy of the day, coupled with their exploration in the hills, had revved up their appetites.

Perhaps.

Or maybe it was the fact that they were both happy, relaxed, and looking forward to another evening ahead together.

The entire day had been wonderful. From sitting side by side in the car to Los Angeles laughing and joking and holding hands in the dark at the Griffith Conservatory, to playing a couple of board games when they got back to her apartment. It was almost eight now, and Amy suggested a snack as they popped in the latest Star Trek film, 'Into Darkness'. Amy found this film much more tolerable than she had first imagined.

Amy walked into the living room, setting a platter of chocolate fondue and strawberries on the coffee table. Sheldon glanced up from the TV, eyeing the pretty tray for a second before meeting Amy's eyes with delight.

"What is this?" He asked happily, sitting closer to the edge of the sofa cushion.

"A treat," Amy elaborated, dispensing a plate for each of them. The fleeting thought crossed her mind that they could feed each other, forgoing the plates, but Amy's sensible mind overrode that silly notion immediately. Sheldon would probably never engage in such frivolity, and she would simply have to accept that. This would have to do. Besides, the level of intimacy they'd already shared today with their dinner banquet was a hell of a start.

"Wow, chocolate covered strawberries. What's the occasion, Amy? I don't recall doing anything of consequence that would warrant this." He said in awe.

Amy smiled at her boyfriend warmly.

"No, Sheldon. It's nothing special. I thought you would enjoy an after dinner treat, is all. I found this wonderful chocolate at Trader Joe's the other day, and couldn't wait for you to try it. Trust me, you will love it."

Sheldon's eyes lit up. He was touched by Amy's generosity and how she always thought of ways to make him happy. He watched her as she picked up the freshly washed berry with a spear, swirling it in the chocolate and then placing it on a plate to set.

"Now you try. It's fun."

Sheldon mimicked her actions, finding the consistency of the chocolate rich and inviting. He was certain he could just get a spoon and eat it like soup. It smelled amazing. He set it on the plate she offered, admiring how the color change from matte to glossy within seconds.

"That is a work of art, Amy! I've always wondered how they get the strawberry to look like that."

Amy smiled at her boyfriend's exuberance.

"It's all in the tempering. I put the chocolate in this fondue pot when we arrived earlier. It's at the perfect temperature now."

Sheldon laughed heartily, the sound bouncing off of Amy's ears pleasurably. She loved seeing him like this; letting his guard down and just enjoying the simple things in life. After they each had at least five strawberries on their respective plates, they sat back to savor their booty.

Sheldon waited until Amy partook first, ever the gentleman. He was momentarily lost as she brought the succulent fruit to her mouth. He never really watched Amy eat before; the task was arbitrary and a necessary human function. Yet he noted that on more than one occasion, especially if Amy enjoyed the food she was eating, she would utter a sound of satisfaction that would find its way into his mind and lodge itself there like a spur.

This instance was no exception. She bit the berry practically in half, its juicy contents spilling out of the chocolate shell and running down her chin in the most inviting way he'd ever imagined. Never before had a seemingly messy action caused such a reaction in him. He wasn't thinking of running for a napkin, or alerting Amy to the sticky juice that was currently dripping down her neck and onto her clavicle in the most tempting of ways.

Sheldon felt his breath escape his mouth in a loud gasp. Amy turned to him, seemingly oblivious.

"Are you alright, Sheldon? Is the berry sour?" She asked innocently, and Sheldon could only open and close his mouth like a guppy.

He shook his head slowly, his eyes shooting down to her stained skin, then returning to her curious eyes.

"Um…you have some…" He motioned to her throat, and for a tense moment he desperately wanted to lean over and suck the juice off of her tender skin.

'Good lord…' He moaned under his breath, averting his eyes as quickly as he could. Amy looked down at his guidance, realizing her mistake.

"Oh, thank you Sheldon. Good thing it didn't land on this blouse. It would have stained it." She said, retrieving a napkin from the tray and dabbing her throat and chin. Sheldon watched the remnants of the juice being whisked away, and he actually felt a pang of sorrow.

"I suppose these are very ripe. And there is a technique to eating them without making a mess. You have to angle it at a 45 degree plane and wrap your lips around the berry so that when the chocolate shell is broken, the juice gathers in the bottom of the cup. I was so eager to taste it that I forgot. Here, you try." She said, picking up one of the berries on his plate and bringing it to his lips. Sheldon gulped and stared at her, wide eyed.

"You…you want to…feed me?" He asked feebly, not entirely sure that was a good idea. Firstly, he had never been fed from another's hand before, even if she was his girlfriend. Secondly, he was a grown man, after all, and since he suffered no physical impediments such as a missing limb or a broken hand, he could feed himself. Perhaps this was another 'experiment' of hers to increase his affections. But he hardly understood that train of thought. Feeding him while he was sick was one thing. Feeding him a strawberry while watching Star Trek? It made no sense whatsoever.

A third and very scary possibility suddenly invaded his thoughts. Perhaps she wanted to feed him because partaking and sharing food with Ones significant other was considered a prelude to romantic activity.

This scenario, of course, made the most sense. And it made his breathing hitch to the point of a fifth symphony movement. After the events of the morning, and how he spent the whole day pushing those thoughts to the far reaches of his mind, he was completely sure this was going to cause him more angst. But her request was so innocent, in as much as she wanted to do something nice for him. He gazed steadily into her eyes.

Amy patiently waited, strawberry poised in hand, while she watched the internal debate play itself like a movie across Sheldon's face. She shook her head and gave him a sheepish smile.

"I _would_ like to feed you, Sheldon. It might add to the enjoyment of the experience if you weren't worried about making a mess. I can keep an eye on the berry and make sure it doesn't stain your clothes."

"That's logical," He said slowly, pursing his lips. However he wasn't entirely convinced. Yet, he couldn't deny the idea of Amy feeding him was immensely tempting.

Opening his mouth halfway, Amy took that as a good sign, and scooted closer to him. He watched her every move like a hawk, completely tuned into her. She smiled primly, tilting the berry in the air until it met his lips.

"Open wider," She whispered, and he complied. The feeling of the cool, smooth confection was heavenly. The taste of the chocolate already working on his endorphin sector of the brain, and he hadn't even taken a bite yet. It _was_ good chocolate, as Amy promised.

They stared at each other a fraction, Amy mesmerized by the action she was delivering and the fact Sheldon closed his eyes for a second as her pinky finger grazed his lip. When he opened them again, he watched as Amy's eyes dilated.

'Oh my,' He thought, shifting a tad on the sofa. He felt frozen, his teeth refusing to accept the treat, and his throat not allowing him to swallow. Amy gave him a curious look.

"Bite it, Sheldon. Quickly, so that the shell comes with you," She said quietly.

Was that her voice, sounding so breathy? Sheldon complied with her request, his teeth tearing the berry in half and sucking it in his mouth quickly, chewing. It was euphoric, the taste of it. The texture was plush and the juice so sweet, the chocolate melting to the temperature of his mouth.

"Mmm…" He moaned, allowing the taste to infiltrate his pleasure receptors completely. He had never tasted chocolate so rich before. Amy watched him enjoy it, noticing that while no juice dripped down his chin as hers had done, there was a large droplet of juice that was clinging to his plump lower lip. Before she could help herself, she leaned over and with her finger scooped it away. Sheldon watched her in disbelief as she stared at the drop a second before placing it in her mouth. His own mouth fell slack. She had no concern for germs as he did.

"Delicious. What do you think?" She whispered, staring at him intently.

Blinking rapidly, Sheldon shook his head so fast he grew dizzy.

'_What do I think?'_ He wondered frantically. _'I think I'm going to go into cardiac arrest if this keeps up.'_

"You were correct. It _was_ delicious. Thank you for that," He said quietly, his voice cracking painfully.

If Amy noticed his uncharacteristic timbre, she made no mention. They both sat back, lost in their thoughts, and finished eating in silence.

This was going to be a long night.

They dressed for bed that night- Amy in her room and Sheldon in Amy's bathroom- lost in their thoughts.

For Amy, their impromptu strawberry encounter had left her breathless and incredibly turned on. As a Neuroscientist, she understood perfectly well the arousal stages. Her intent tonight wasn't to turn Sheldon on, but she had to admit the end result was pretty damn amazing. Perhaps she should have known sharing such an intimate treat, coupled with the romantic gesture of feeding him, would have the effect it did. Yet with Sheldon, she could never be sure what would make it through to his libido.

The lustful look on his face as he watched her take the strawberry into her mouth and nibble it definitely gave _her_ libido a jolt.

Unbeknownst to her, Sheldon was thinking of nothing else, save the image of Amy's soft lips and tongue devouring the sweet fruit. Every cell in his body came to attention at her strategic move. Maybe she wasn't aware of what she was doing, but either way, the effect was immediate.

Either that little vixen knew exactly what she was doing to him, or she was simply being her innocent self and projecting what she deemed to be the norm of pleasure. Chocolate covered strawberries were universally known as an aphrodisiac.

If it were the first, he would have to tread more carefully. And if it were the latter, he was in serious trouble. Maybe even more so than he first anticipated.

When he exited the bathroom, Amy was already turning the bed down and sliding off her slippers. She had opted for a pretty white cotton nightgown with flutter sleeves which showed a great deal of her arms and clavicle. It hit just above her knees, and was buttoned from cleavage to waist in the front with pretty satin buttons. Sheldon stared at her for too long a time, memorizing how lovely she looked. By no means was she uncovered or inappropriate in any way, but he had never seen her looking so pretty. Her hair was once again up in a ponytail, exposing her neck.

'_I'm in hell_,' He thought in a panic. Made no better by the look she gave him when she spotted him by the bathroom door.

He himself had opted for a powder blue pair of pajamas, calling on the fact that the color and pair were her favorite. She once remarked to him while helping him with laundry night how soft and inviting the color was. At the time he snatched them from her bewildered hands, shoving them in the basket roughly.

"Amy, please do not fondle my bedroom attire. It's unseemly," He chastised to her at the time. While packing Thursday evening, he hesitantly grabbed them from his underwear drawer, shoving them in his suitcase before he could analyze why he chose that pair especially.

Amy cleared her throat, snapping him out of his reverie.

"Sheldon, would you like anything before we retire? A beverage or a snack perhaps?" She asked him warmly. He thought back to the 'snack' they shared not more than an hour ago. He didn't think he'd survive another culinary delight tonight.

"No thank you," He answered quickly, flinging off his own slippers and entering the bed swiftly.

Amy shrugged, sliding in herself.

"I turned the heater on the waterbed down just a tad, Sheldon. I think last night with both of our body heat in the bed, it was a bit warm. Is that alright with you? I know how you like the temperature inside to be a constant 71 degrees. I didn't want you to be overheated."

Despite his uneasiness, Sheldon smiled and turned on his side to face her.

"Thank you, Amy. That is most considerate of you. I was a little warm last night, but not enough to disrupt my sleep."

'_Waking up spooned against you was enough to do that all on its own,'_ He thought wearily.

Amy returned his smile, laying there staring at the ceiling.

"So did you enjoy the day? I think we had a very nice time, don't you agree?" She asked.

Sheldon nodded in the semi darkness.

"Yes, I agree. I very much enjoy playing games with you, especially counterfactuals. It is not often I can play equally with a matched opponent."

Amy snorted at his arrogance. Sometimes, Sheldon needed to be knocked down a peg or two.

"Well…sometimes even _you_ are outmatched. But that of course is no reflection on _your_ genius. Sometimes the dice is stacked in someone else's favor. You know…the luck of the draw."

She tried to suppress the grin that was threating to split her face in two, while she waited for his inevitable rebuttal.

"I don't think that is entirely accurate, Amy. You must admit that in most of our games with the group, I am usually the victor. The only player who can even come close is Leonard, and that is being generous. Sometimes I even feel sorry for the little guy and allow him to win."

His voice dripped condescension, and once again, Amy had to stifle a smile.

"Yes, I agree with your assessment. But you said when you play with 'the group'- she used the air quotes as he furrowed his brows adorably- "But you didn't say when you played with _me_. Many times in our gaming interactions, the percentages would show that 'I' in fact, am usually the victor."

Amy chanced a glance in his direction, and was rewarded with his incredulous face peering at her in shock.

"I beg your pardon?" He asked, indignation dripping from every syllable.

Amy released a deep breath, turning on her side to mirror his position. Sheldon, without knowing it, moved a fraction closer to her.

"Sheldon…let's review. You know I had you nailed on that Pictionary game. You couldn't even figure out that the clue was Santa Claus. Who doesn't get the clue of a jolly old guy with a white beard?"

Sheldon's eyes bored into Amy's while he debated, finally shooting her a pout.

"That's only because I don't like Christmas. I had no idea who you referring to. It wasn't like you made the clues even fairly discernable."

Amy rolled her eyes, herself scooting a fraction closer to him and getting more comfortable. Oddly enough, after last evening's awkwardness, she was feeling better about tonight's sleeping arrangements. While Sheldon still looked like he was about to bolt at any moment, his knuckles didn't grip the sheets in a death grip. Whatever his experiment of spooning with her last night accomplished, she was grateful. She didn't want Sheldon to ever feel fear in her presence. Right now, they were only about six inches apart.

"Everyone knows who Santa Claus is, even if you don't like Christmas. You just can't admit that I am a better board game player than you. While you excel in so many areas, board games are clearly a weak point for you.

Amy primly turned and removed her glasses, placing them on the bedside table.

Cooper retort in 3-2-1:

"Ha! That is such a misnomer, Amy Farrah Fowler. I _have_ no weak points where academia are concerned. And you know why I cannot play many board games more than once. I have an eidetic memory and I memorize all of the answers. There is no challenge in that."

His voice sounded petulant, and Amy felt guilty for pushing him. She knew that many of his day to day tasks were ruled by his extremely intelligent brain. Having remembered every word, date, and circumstance that ever happened to him must be exhausting. She momentarily forgot that he was no ordinary man. But she still wasn't letting him off the hook. This was becoming too much fun. Especially since he wasn't exploding like an atom at her playful critique of his gaming style.

"Even though I don't share your eidetic memory, I do possess a photographic one. So you should just admit I may be able to give you a run for your money," She said cockily, pretending to focus on folding her sheet just so.

But competitive Cooper had come out to play; she was certain by the annoyed grunting noise he made in shock.

"Oh please, Dr. Fowler. You know that in a battle of wits, I could best you. I have infinitely more experience than you. I am older than you, and I have more academic awards than you.

Amy snorted loudly.

"Hmm…I seem to remember a time not too long ago when Penny, Leonard, you and I played a plethora of games, and Penny and I whipped the pants off of you both. You couldn't even do long division after spinning in a circle against Penny for a minute. You passed out, taking down your whiteboard, I recall. Ring any bells?"

Sheldon grimaced. How could he forget? That was the night Penny threw him down like a sack of Idaho potatoes, and he inhaled a blueberry from that pie up his nose. It was also the night Amy kissed his face.

Well, that part wasn't so bad…

"Yes, well…no one has beaten me at a certain game which we will keep nameless" He trailed off, to which Amy smiled. She knew what he was thinking. The last time they played _that_ particular game, they ended up having hot sex.

Well, in theory.

"Dungeons and Dragons doesn't count, Sheldon. Besides…I think we were _both_ winners that night," She said saucily, causing Sheldon's blood pressure to rise. Leave it to her to bring that up now! It wasn't like he could ever forget that they engaged in mind blowing coitus in the fantasy board game, which nearly did him in. How he was able to escort her to the door that night without giving away how aroused he was, was a miracle. This conversation had taken an interesting, if not terrifying turn. He had to get control of it back. Better to rely on his accomplishments, he surmised.

"Need I remind you, Amy, that I toured Europe and was a Professor at the Heidelberg Institute in Germany for a whole summer semester? Upon which returning I did my dissertation at age 14 and received my first PhD at 16?

Not to be outdone, Amy smiled sweetly.

"Only if I can remind _you_ that I performed my first operation at age 14. On myself, no less. If you recall. And without anesthesia.

Amy stared him down with her green eyes blazing. There was a word for what they were doing.

Oh yes.

_Foreplay…_

Neither one was aware where this was headed, as they'd never been in such a situation before. It seemed pointing out each other's accomplishments was a certain turn on for both of them.

"No need to bombard me with your accomplishments, Sheldon. I don't know if you were aware, but I was on the debate team in college. As I recall, you have a self-professed fear and loathing of public speaking. In the public arena, I think it is _I _who best _you_. When we went to the Science conference in Big Sur, I do believe my discussion on the mapping of the human genome knocked your little talk about String Theory out of the ballpark."

Sheldon's eyes grew exponentially wider.

"That…that was only because of Howard and Bernadette's fighting over her boy toy ex. And you didn't help, talking to Penny from the panel. It was very distracting." He said indignantly.

"Be that as it may, I still gave my talk the next hour with flawless reviews, to a standing ovation."

The shock on Sheldon's face was wholly satisfying, and Amy smiled smugly.

Fowler 1- Cooper 0

Why, that little vixen. She would pay for that. His blood pounded in his veins, and his heart began a staccato thump that made him think of Coronary's and defibrillators. All the while, Amy grinned at him, her eyes issuing a challenge. The gauntlet thrown, Sheldon had no recourse but to act. What was this feeling welling up within him? He felt on the verge of suffocation, yet every cell in his body was thrumming. And why the hell did she appear so attractive in this moment? With her flushed skin and bright eyes blazing at him.

Game, set, match.

Or so Amy thought.

She really let her guard down for an instant. But that was more than enough time for defeat. This was Dr. Sheldon Cooper she was trifling with, after all.

In the blink of an eye, Sheldon had swooped over, grabbed Amy by the waist, and pinned her down while he began to tickle her madly. Amy thrashed around, trying to gain purchase, but her feet kept sliding across the sheets. The motion of the waterbed made her feel like she was on the ocean. She bellowed and yelled, laughing, but Sheldon wouldn't relent. If anything, her capture only added to his delight. He would show her who was boss, he thought fiercely.

"Take what you said, back, Dr. Fowler." He yelled, no real anger in his tone but she still shivered from the sound.

"No. I will not." She said resolutely.

His eyes widened yet again at her audacity.

"Who's the smartest Scientist in Pasadena? Come on?" He goaded her, tickling her ribs relentlessly while she flailed about. This was one tactic that Amy hadn't imagined Sheldon would employ. However, she preferred it to a noogie or something equally juvenile.

"Stop it! I can't…I can't breathe, Sheldon. Please?" She begged, losing her breath but finally gaining ground by grabbing his head and thrusting her fingers in his hair tightly. Sheldon licked his lips, laughing hysterically, enjoying her struggles, and relishing the feel of her hand in his hair.

"Come on, Neuroscientist. Give it up. Who's the best? Who's your daddy? _"Oh, it's you Dr. Cooper, my hero!"_ He parroted, and Amy despite herself had to laugh.

"Why, you arrogant misogynist!" She yelled breathlessly, and it only added to Sheldon's attack.

Amy used her knee to whack him across the hip, temporarily gaining an advantage.

"Ouch," He lamented like a baby, his face scrunching up in mock pain. But he trounced her again, grabbing her wrists securely.

"Say it. Say it," He bellowed, beginning to lose his breath himself. "Who's the best? I'm not letting you go until you give me my due. Who has the smartest brain in this room?"

Amy stared daggers at him, pursing her lips.

"You're looking at her! At least I know what Santa Claus looks like," She shouted, able to unpin one of her hands and tickle him back. Sheldon squirmed and redoubled his efforts. He sat up, aided by his upper body strength. Taking hold of both of her arms, he tumbled with her back down to the bed. They rocked and rolled on the surface, Sheldon rolling Amy underneath him.

"Surrender to me," He yelled, pleading, and suddenly Amy stopped wiggling. The desperation in his voice had changed from one of persuasion to one of longing.

Something changed, and rather dramatically at that.

In her fall, Amy scooted down and Sheldon fell on top of her, aligning perfectly, his hips falling in the cradle of hers. A sharp gasp escaped her lips, then a moan. Sheldon stared down at her, this beautiful creature that was his…and the laughter died.

His eyes raked down her form, seeing the way her breasts rose and fell with her rapid breathing, the way he and Amy were pressed so tightly together…there. The way his larger frame dwarfed hers. He realized all too late the intimacy of their actions, and now where it had led. Sheldon's coiled muscles involuntarily relaxed, the action allowing him to sink further into her prone body. What started out as good natured competitiveness, had morphed into a very real and sensuous foreplay session.

Unconsciously, or perhaps with great knowledge, a growl escaped Sheldon's throat. Amy's eyes widened to saucers. Never, in four years, had she ever heard Sheldon Cooper utter such a sound. They lay this way, as seconds passed, breathing heavily and watching each other, hawk to prey. He felt himself growing harder, and closed his eyes as he ground his length against her.

Amy had doubted his attraction to her in the past. There was no denying it now. The realization dawned on her face as she stared at him, open mouthed with fluttering eyelashes. Yet, he couldn't find it in himself to be embarrassed nor afraid. She wanted tangible proof. Here it was.

'_Dear Lord_,' He thought. The feel of her…and they were fully clothed. He didn't know if he'd survive being naked against her. He didn't even know if he'd survive this! His entire being was electrified, as though he had stepped on a live wire with wet feet.

Amy was panting, a million thoughts running through her mind. All she could grasp onto though, was how to keep him where he was, with his delicious weight pressing her into the bed.

"Sheldon…you…please," Amy groaned, not sure what she was begging for. Stop? Continue? The edges of her sanity were becoming blurred as he wouldn't release her from his grip.

Sheldon felt his control snapping. He'd seen enough movies and read enough books to know that when a moment like this presented itself, you didn't let it pass. He was scared to death, even as the adrenaline coursed through his body like wildfire. He could do this. He would do this. He had to.

But he would do this his way.

Leaning down, he whispered in her ear while still holding her in a vice like grip.

"Say uncle."

His hot breath sent a shiver down her back, set her blood aflame and made her throat dry. She stared into his eyes, seeing the indigo blue fade to near black, and knew she would say anything now.

Anything at all.

"W-what?" She whispered, thrilling at the way his smirk turned predatory.

Jesus…

A moist, warm tongue came out and traced her ear from the lobule to the helix. Then Amy felt the warm breath again, soothing it. She let loose another moan, this one louder than before. Sheldon kissed a path up her neck, his breath harsh in her ear.

What the hell was happening?

"I said, Dr. Fowler…say uncle." He whispered, sensuality dripping from his every word. He wanted control, and he wanted her to relinquish it to him. If that is what it would take to unleash the caged man in him, she would gladly comply. She felt helpless, caught in a snare that she had no wish nor hope to escape. She might die from this, she decided. But at least, she could go happy. She turned her head slowly, staring in the eyes of her greatest weakness. What he saw in hers made him bold.

Surrender.

"Uncle."

All thoughts were banished, as Sheldon captured her lips hungrily. He slid his lips against hers, over and over, in the most sensuous dance she would ever be partner to. The hand in his hair slid down to his neck, then his back, forcing him closer to her. Damn her, and damn those strawberries from earlier. Even with her brushed teeth, he tasted them. It brought back all of the less than gentlemanly thoughts watching her eat them evoked.

Sheldon slanted his mouth, his tongue seeking access and she readily obeyed, opening her mouth and taking his full lower lip between her teeth. The moan that escaped him sent a torrent of moisture to Amy's core. He growled again, kissing a path down from her lips to her neck before returning to her lips.

Taking full advantage of his distraction, Amy wrapped her leg around his waist and grabbed his ass tightly. The round firmness of it was delightful to her, it's teasing form often a featured star in her fantasies. Their kissing became softer…deeper…slower. So different from their usual awkwardly sweet kisses. This was like nothing either had ever experienced. The entire day had been an exercise in restraint. They had both obviously reached their tether.

"Amy," He gasped, grounding his hardness against her softness, shocked at how quickly this was escalating. He roughly broke away, staring down at her wildly, and pinioned her arms against the bed beside her head. With her touching him like this, he would go insane. He needed his control back, he needed to be in charge. Otherwise he was going to go under the tidal wave that was threatening to swallow him whole. He had a very real feeling that he was going to spontaneously combust at this rate.

Her entire body was on fire, awaiting his next move. She was certain he would recoil, jump off her and rush out of the room.

Or possibly, the apartment.

But she was wrong.

Shaking, Sheldon released one of her hands, and allowed his own to travel down her bodice to the top button of her nightgown. His eyes seared into hers, begging for permission, and she wordlessly gave it to him. She wanted to give him everything. Her shock was apparent in the way her eyes followed his, and what he was doing to her.

He deftly undid a button and then another…until the dress was effectively split down the center.

Finally, he undid the two halves, his eyes greedily drinking her in.

She was perfect. Warm and pink and flushed with arousal.

Arousal that_ he_ had caused.

A rush of blood ran somewhere well south of his brain at that knowledge. Never had he in his entire life been responsible for anyone's arousal. The feeling left him feeling dizzy with lust.

Amy lay paralyzed, fear and want burning through her like rocket fuel. When his eyes slid up to hers, she saw everything in them she was certain she would never see.

Desire.

Appreciation.

Love…

A tear slipped out of her eye, two more following. Sheldon watched her with fascination. Tears normally terrified him. These tears, however...

He wished he could bottle them and carry with him forever.

"You are stunning," He whispered reverently to the woman beneath him, watching how her lips parted and feeling how her entire body melted. He wanted to simply devour her. He placed his hand gently on her breast, the weight of it perfection. Amy groaned, the coolness of his hand startling her. He watched, enraptured, as the nipple hardened further with his ministrations; due to his cool fingers or his touch, he wasn't certain. Lowering his head, he captured a peak between his lips, marveling anew at the silky yet rough texture. Amy cried out in pleasure, arching her back and sending her breast further into his mouth.

He gently nibbled on her taut flesh, his other hand releasing hers, finally secure in the knowledge she wouldn't bolt. He put the other hand to good use, cupping the other breast and squeezing it gingerly.

"Sheldon…" She mumbled incoherently, as he teased and tormented her until she was a writhing mess. His teeth nipped her tenderly as his lips and tongue delivered endless delight, and Amy thought she was going to pass out.

He wanted to make her his, in every possible way. He admitted this to himself freely now, but this wasn't the time. Lord…did he want her. But he would not give in yet.

Not to 'his' base desires.

Yet he would fully allow her to give into hers. She needed release, his little vixen. He'd done research, he'd watched…films, as horrid as those were - and he reasoned that if those ordinary humans could achieve such a feat, this would be a no brainer for him. He simply had to put his anxieties on the shelf.

"Amy…let me do something. Please?" He begged, his eyes frantic as they searched hers.

Amy had no idea what this _something_ was, in which Sheldon spoke. She could only believe that whatever he meant, it was a decision he didn't arrive at lightly. She wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. She shook her head in the affirmative.

His eyes never leaving hers, he slid his mouth down to her sternum, onward to her navel and laying a gentle kiss there. Amy was so wet she could barely see straight, and the modesty she felt was nothing compared to the excitement. What in heaven's name was he doing to her? And why was he down there?

"I want to touch you, Amy. All of you. Would allow me that honor? I promise, I won't hurt you, or make you uncomfortable. Please?" He whispered, his big eyes full of fear. As if she would refuse.

"Of course," She whispered back, her voice cracking. She was nervous and shy, but the way he was looking at her put her fears at bay.

Sheldon's eyes wandered down to her womanhood, landing on the pretty white panties she wore. They were virginal and sweet, just like his Amy.

"I want to do this," He choked out. "But I'm afraid. I've never…done anything like this before. I don't know what to do," He admitted quietly, shyly averting his eyes.

Amy's heart ached for her man. She was as inexperienced at this as he was.

"We are truly the blind leading the blind, are we not?" She asked in humor, and despite his arousal, Sheldon laughed heartily.

"I have a genius IQ, Amy… I should think I could figure this out without any damage being done," He said slyly.

A thought occurred to Amy just then; a naughty, wicked thought. Could she?

"Would it be easier if we did it together?" She asked, the low and husky tone of her voice belying her own timid fears. Sheldon stared at her agape, his breath hitching.

"Together? But, how?" He whispered, his gaze pinned to hers.

Amy let out a shuddering breath. She trusted Sheldon. She knew he wouldn't hurt her. Still, no man had ever touched her like this. Yet if any man ever had undeniable permission, it was Sheldon.

"Put your hand on top of mine, palm down," She instructed, and Sheldon complied. Together, they slowly slid their joined hands down her stomach until they came in contact with the waistband of her panties. Sheldon was torn between watching her face, and watching the momentum of his hand on hers.

Amy was only going to rub across the outer fabric, yet something primal and bold stirred within her. She was desperate in that moment for him to know her. To touch her. _All _of her. If he was going to run, it would be now. Sliding lower, she made for them to reach inside the silky fabric, until together they grazed her clitoris.

She had touched herself before, of course. But it never felt like this. Sheldon's strong hand gripped hers tightly, his long fingers grazing her most intimate flesh with precision. Amy moaned as together they rubbed tight circles upon the nub. His fingers were longer than hers, sliding ahead of her own to caress her. Looking down, she was transfixed to see Sheldon's eyes glued to where their hands disappeared inside the lace. Slowly, his eyes travelled upwards until they met hers. The look he gave her was electric.

While Sheldon knew the anatomy of a woman's…nether regions…he was a genius after all- he had never in his life felt such a thing. He knew the clitoris was the epicenter of a woman's pleasure, yet he was keenly aware there were more…hidden treasures- that lay beneath. Biting his lip, he watched Amy move purposefully against their joined hands. His own flesh hardened further at what he was feeling. Amy threw her head back, feeling the beginnings of her orgasm start to coil tightly in her abdomen. A deep, sexy moan forced its way past her lips, and Sheldon couldn't take much more.

"Lower," He coaxed, his voice a hoarse whisper. Amy knew what he was suggesting. She swallowed thickly, trying to hang on. Nodding her head, together they moved their hands down further.

Amy cried out as Sheldon's fingers twisted with her own, sliding into her wet heat.

"Oh, Amy," He exclaimed, more turned on than ever before as his hand rubbed and caressed her soft flesh. She was like a furnace, one that promised unbelievable warmth. Amy grinded against him, unable to withstand the sensual onslaught. Sheldon watched her, utterly dazzled by her beauty and the way she was shaking against him. His manhood was trapped between them, rubbing deliciously against Amy's hip. Sheldon moaned helplessly, wanting more than anything to make Amy orgasm in that moment. He sat up abruptly, leaning his forehead against hers. Amy's eyes met his, the hunger she saw there making her tremble even more.

"Move your hand. Now," He ordered, his voice a shaky whisper. Amy obediently did as he asked. A second later, she was shocked into muteness as he left his task momentarily to hook his fingers into the waistband of her panties. He yanked them down her shaking legs, throwing them off to the side before taking over where they had both left off. He gently slid his fingers through her drenched womanhood.

Amy whimpered as he plunged two fingers inside of her, while his thumb caressed her clitoris with tender care. It seemed Sheldon Cooper was a very fast learner, she thought in a haze, too entranced to dwell on that as she watched him lick his bottom lip hungrily.

"You're so soft…so _wet_," He mumbled, marveling at this most hidden part of her. She looked like a hothouse flower, opening up to him to reveal her beautiful petals within. She was his. _All_ his.

"Oh, Amy…I had no idea. No idea how you would feel," He said in reverence, bending lower to reach Amy's chest which was now at eye level. He took one rosy capped peak into his mouth, sucking gently at first and then with more force. All the while, his hand worked her tender flesh like a master violinist would work a Stradivarius.

"Sheldon please," She whimpered, wantonly grinding her hips in a circle against his willing hand. He obliged her, watching her with love drunk eyes. She looked like a Goddess.

Sheldon never experienced the feelings that were rocketing through his system. It was like a fuse had been lit on a keg of dynamite. His Amy- his beautiful Amy…was coming undone because he was giving her pleasure. Him. No one else. And no one else ever would, if he had anything to say about it. A possessiveness the likes of which he'd never felt took hold of him. She thought he was indifferent to her. She thought he didn't want her. He would have to make her see the truth.

"You think…I don't want this? Want you? You're wrong, Amy. I've thought about us. I've thought about laying you down, touching you. Kissing you all over. Everywhere," He gritted out, and Amy let out a hoarse whimper.

"I've thought of little else since the day I met you. Always denying it. Always pushing it to the furthest reaches of my mind. I tried to run and hide from my feelings. I can't any more, Amy. I can't." He rasped out, touching her faster and faster.

"Sheldon…Oh," She groaned, quickly losing control. "Don't. Don't fight them."

Sheldon closed his eyes, overwhelmed.

"Amy…God...You are perfect," He whimpered.

"I love you…I love you," She moaned, the coil in her belly nearly painful. She knew what was coming; had experienced it before. But never like this.

"I've got you, Amy. Let go," He whispered.

His fingers not relenting, he pushed her over the edge with ease, sending her spiraling into oblivion and giving them both what they wanted. Amy cried out as she came in a torrent of blinding light and flashing sound. She fisted the sheets as though she was hurtling through space at 650 million miles an hour. Stars burst in front of her vision as she felt her heart nearly explode in her chest.

"Sheldon…" She screamed, her muscles seizing and gripping his fingers as she reached the pinnacle. All he could do was stare at her, amazed at her beauty, forgetting his own pleasure in the wake of hers.

God, she was resplendent. He thought he was giving her a gift, but he was gravely mistaken.

She was giving this gift to him.

Sheldon rode out her orgasm as surely as it had been his own. Amy's legs shook, her breath erratically pushing against his face. She released the sheets and fisted his hair, his back, anywhere she could manage to grab. Her nails dug into his flesh painfully, the feeling igniting his blood. He knew a glacially cold shower would be in his immediate future. Watching her in pleasure and knowing he was the reason for it was worth any discomfort. Falling backward heavily into the bed, Sheldon held her close while the shudders continued to wrack her body. Every few seconds her body twitched as she panted, the aftershocks as delicious as the orgasm.

'Oh…my," She forced out shakily, finally of sound mind to meet Sheldon's gaze. He was watching her with complete and total devotion. She wanted to say something, anything…but her voice wouldn't work. She gripped him tightly, smashing her lips to his own. Sheldon moaned as her tongue plunged into his mouth wantonly, scattering his thoughts to the four winds.

"Sheldon…I have to touch you. Please? She begged, her face so hopeful. The request moved him beyond belief.

Touch him? Oh, dear. He couldn't do that tonight. He had just enough courage to please her.

"Amy, I need to do this, for you alone. Alright? Can we let this be about you tonight?" He asked tenderly, his fingers, caressing her hip. Amy watched the fear play in his eyes and realized his plight. This was an enormous step for him. For them both. The fact he was willing to do this was monumental. She was proud of him. Reaching up, she stroked his jaw delicately.

"Of course, Sheldon."

He smiled gratefully, amazed at how beautiful she was.

'_I did that to her'_, He thought in wonder, in exultation, in mind splitting joy.

Sheldon quickly discovered, to his great delight, that he enjoyed pleasuring Amy, most assuredly. And it wasn't disgusting, as he previously feared. It wasn't unpleasant, didn't make him conjure up germs, or make him feel uncomfortable. If there was anything worthy left to explore in this Universe he revered so much, it was the body of his beloved Amy. She was unexplored territory, and her life force held the meaning of life for him. That he would find her, his equal, or that she would find _him_…impossible. Improbable.

A miracle.

He would show her, finally, what that meant to him.

Sheldon removed his hand from her most intimate place, careful not to hurt her in her over sensitized state. He pulled her closer to him, tucking her in the crook of his neck, and she could do no more than lob her head against his shoulder. A thin sheen of sweat clung to her body, and it was strikingly erotic. Glancing down, he kissed the skin of her clavicle tenderly, raining kisses up to her throat as her breathing returned to normal. Her nightie was rumpled and her limbs akimbo, but she looked otherwise unharmed.

What she did look, in fact, was shockingly beautiful.

Then Sheldon heard it; a tiny sob, and his heart shattered in his chest.

Dear lord, did he make a mistake? Did he hurt her? He frantically pushed himself up, his fight or flight instinct in full survival mode. Her tear stained, beautiful face was watching him, with a look of pure amazement. He felt the guilt, shame, and uncertainly begin to wash over him, threatening to pull him under.

Until she smiled the most beatific smile he could ever imagine seeing, this side of heaven. He could do nothing but stare at her, memorizing every nuance of her features in this very moment.

"Good god…what have you done to me?" She asked in astonishment, the happiness evident in her eyes.

He didn't know what to do, what to say, or how to do or say it. He was lost, tumbling…falling. Would he ever reach the ground?

"Are-are you alright?" He whispered, his eyes boring into hers with such tenderness, that more tears escaped.

This distressed Sheldon further.

"Amy! Answer me. Did I hurt you?" He whimpered, his blue eyes concerned. Amy bit her lip to stifle the sobs that were threatening to burst forth.

"Oh, no. You saved me, Sheldon. You _saved_ me," She said, her voice cracking and small.

Confused, Sheldon gaped at her as she continued to sob, not knowing what on Earth to do.

"Saved you?' He whispered, swallowing the lump in his throat. His head was pounding, his heart racing, and his nether regions ready to explode. Perhaps he needed a nitroglycerin pill.

"Yes," She croaked, wiping her face of tears. "I was dead. You brought me back to life. I would be dead if it weren't for you. And now…what you just did for me…I would never have gotten to experience that. I… have no words."

He had no answer to this. He didn't know how to process it. Not yet. But whatever it meant, it must be good. Her smile was radiant, her skin was glowing, and her eyes…shining like the sun. Scooting back down on the bed, he held out his arms and Amy lay in the circle of them. His predicament was going nowhere, but it didn't matter. She needed the warmth of his embrace right now. And he discovered to his great astonishment, he needed hers. Almost an hour passed in silence, when Sheldon thought sleep had finally claimed her.

"Thank you, Sheldon. That was beautiful," Came her sweet voice, full of awe. She had no right to thank him. It was he who should be thanking her.

His heart swelled to near bursting capacity.

"You're welcome, little lady. That's how it's done in the Lone Star state," He drawled in his best East Texas cadence, trying to lighten the mood. He felt foolish and yet, when Amy burrowed into his chest and he felt her smile, he smiled too.

Perhaps he_ could_ do this, after all. Of course he could.

Of course.

"So…all that from a little friendly competitiveness, huh?" She mumbled, her voice exhausted. "I'll have to remember that."

Sheldon chuffed in mock annoyance. "You would be wise to note my wrath, Miss Fowler. I think I have sufficiently proven myself tonight. I believe you remember what happened the last time I was 'bested'." He said wistfully, and Amy had to agree. That spanking was forever ingrained in her mind.

"Duly noted, Dr. Cooper. Duly noted." Amy relented, smiling into Sheldon's chest.

They fell asleep in each other's arms, facing one another with their legs intertwined.

It seemed the tables had been turned this night. The scoreboard now accurately reflected the status quo.

Fowler- 1 - Cooper-1,000.000.000

A/N- Thank you for reading. X


	27. Chapter 27

~Chapter 27~

A/N- May I just say…you all are the most wonderful readers in the entire Big Bang Theory fandom. You have given me so much wonderful love and feedback. I only hope I can continue to do Sheldon and Amy justice with the remainder of their story and in doing so, please you. Oh, and by the by…wasn't that picture of Jim and Mayim hugging at his Walk of Fame Ceremony just lovely? *Sighs* I mentioned on Tumblr that I could picture them as Sheldon and Amy, after Sheldon receives his Nobel. (Or Amy).

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Now, you made me feel so good- Yeah, like I never ever thought I would. You know you make me feel so strong- And now our laughter just goes on and on…So c'mon lay your hands on me- Cause close to you is where I really want to be. And if it ever gets too much- I'll see your face and sense the grace and feel the magic in our touch. Oh, lay your hands, Lay your hands on me…" Thompson Twins - Lay Your Hands on Me ~ Part 3

Amy awoke to darkness, but not in a cold and empty bed like yesterday morning. Sheldon was cuddled up next to her, his features relaxed in sleep. She wondered at the fact he still slumbered, since he was usually an early riser. Then again, they _had_ burnt the midnight oil pretty late last night. It was barely dawn, but Amy had never felt so rested.

They were sleeping face to face this time, her leg thrown across his hip and his arm across her waist. Amy's heartbeat accelerated as last night came flooding back. Her body still throbbed deliciously everywhere Sheldon's hands had touched her. Her breasts felt tingly and even a bit sore from his ministrations, and her nether regions ached with a sweet heaviness that only happened after orgasm.

She wasn't about to complain, though. She had no idea what had gotten into him, but whatever it was, she was happy. The only frustrating part was that he didn't want her to reciprocate by pleasing him. Upon further reflection, she decided that he was probably only able to process one form of intimacy at a time. Showing her his passion by giving in to her was enough for now. He put aside his fears and phobias to give her something so special and beautiful, and tears gathered once again as she remembered the care and tenderness mixed with sensuality as he loved her. Every touch, every look, and every word only added to the ever growing certainty that Sheldon was in love with her as much as she was with him. He would probably wave this away at best, or flat out deny it at worst. But she was a patient woman, and could wait.

She gazed sleepily upon this man of Science, who had so gradually become her entire world. In sleep, his beautiful face was peaceful, void of the strict limits he imposed upon himself in his waking hours. While watching his brilliant mind at work was indeed something to behold, she found a quiet serenity watching him relaxed and unguarded. Maybe because in this state, anything could be filtering through his beautiful mind. Perhaps even her.

Reaching out, she moved a piece of hair that fallen across his forehead back in place. It was baby soft and she smiled.

'_I wish I could unlock the secrets to your heart, Sheldon. I wish you would let me in.' _She thought silently.

Never before had she known a love like this. It was all consuming. He literally owned her heart, and the obviousness of that truth terrified her. He held her feelings in the palm of his hand. She knew that she never should have given him such power, but how could she have helped herself?

She sighed, knowing that he could completely break her heart now with just a word.

Sheldon's eyes opened and met hers in the early morning light. She pulled her hand back abruptly, lest he think she was molesting him in his sleep.

For minutes, he simply lay there, watching her intently. She was trapped in his vision, not sure what to say, if anything. What could she say that would do merit to what they shared last night?

Coming awake slowly, Sheldon's mind erased the cobwebs of sleep and all he could focus on was Amy. He could tell she was weary of what to do now; it wasn't like they had any table of reference to go on. Not only was sharing a bed a new phenomenon for the pair, but reaching second and third base as well.

Drat…remembering how she felt last night wasn't going to help. Remembering her cries of pleasure weren't doing him any favors, either. He blinked rapidly, taking a deep breath to steady his nerves.

"Good morning," He said cautiously, so softly she barely heard him. The shyness in his voice moved her and she wanted to simply fling her arms around him and kiss him senseless.

"It is," She whispered, feeling dizzy as Sheldon's eyes followed a trail from her eyes to her lips.

The way he was looking at her…

"Are you okay?" She asked him, worrying that this new found intimacy was too much for him. When he nodded and his lips curved into a faint smile, she felt a huge weight lift from her chest.

"Are _you_ okay?" He countered, concern dripping from every syllable. She nodded, scooting closer to him. He didn't tense like she thought he would; if anything, he himself moved closer to her.

"Yes, I'm good. More than good. I…I don't know what to say, Sheldon…" She trailed off, feeling so exposed and vulnerable. Sheldon looked down at her bodice, once again buttoned up after last night's activities. He himself had tenderly secured her to right, after she had fallen asleep curled into him. He wanted her to feel secure and comfortable. It had taken great restraint to not tear it off again and sate this thirst that had begun to consume him.

If the guys knew the thoughts filtering through his mind lately, they would never let him hear the end of it. But he found he couldn't concern himself with that, now. All he wanted was so close to him. He had to just let himself take it. So what was stopping him?

He felt shy and vulnerable himself, this morning. Never in his life had he felt the desires coursing through him. He was worried that Amy was going to be upset with him for not allowing her to touch him in return. But hearing her sweet voice put his fears to rest. The way she was looking at him, as if he could do no wrong, made his heart sing.

"You don't have to say anything, Amy. Anything at all. Seeing you so happy, and knowing that I caused that happiness…that is enough for me. I finally made you happy," He said tenderly, forcing Amy to bite her lip to once again stifle a sob. He was watching her as though she were a mirage that would vanish any moment.

Amy didn't know if she could bear this much love. It was beginning to spill out the ends of her. She sat up, looking at him intently.

"Sheldon…you make me happy every day, just by being you. I don't need you to prove your love for me by us being physical. That is only icing. You are the _whole_ cake. Do you know…have you any idea how truly wonderful you are? I don't mean your intellect, which we both know is superb. I mean you heart. Your soul….Do you know, how special you really are? How special you are, to _me_?" She asked him, her voice a broken whisper. Sheldon could only stare at her in awe.

"No." He answered, startling her.

Amy's eyes widened dramatically at his honesty. The dark, cool room was quiet as the couple lay there, each afraid of their own feelings.

"No?" She whispered, her eyes imploring him to elaborate. When Sheldon closed his eyes, looking away, Amy knew she had to reach him. Putting her fingers on his chin, she turned his face back to hers.

"Sheldon…why? What makes you say that? Surely, you must know you mean everything to me."

Sheldon shook his head, ashamed. Taking a deep, shaky breath, he met her gentle gaze.

"Amy, because of all of my rules, quirks, and insecurities…I never felt that it was necessary to open myself up to expressing emotions. I was…_am_…afraid to admit that…I…I'm not good enough. Not strong enough. I pontificate how I am exceptional. But the truth is…I'm not. No one ever looked beyond the surface. No one ever tried. Until you. I'm not worthy of the pedestal you've placed me upon." He said seriously.

Amy gazed upon her dear, sweet Sheldon…only wanting to love him and prove to him how worthy he really was. Scooting over, she began to caress his face, relieved when he leaned his cheek into her hand.

"Do you remember when I told you that you were the finest man I've ever known?" She asked quietly, and Sheldon nodded. He opened his eyes to gaze at her steadily.

"Yes. I remember," He whispered. Amy smiled. That night seemed like a lifetime ago.

"I meant it. Every. Single. Word. Sheldon…I wish you could see what I see when I look at you." She said with feeling. Sheldon sat up against the pillows, shivering when the hand on his cheek moved down to caress his neck. He closed his eyes as he allowed the pleasurable sensations to take hold.

"What _do_ you see?" He murmured huskily. Amy's eyes watered.

"I see…the man that I love. I see the man that excites me like no one else ever could. I see the man that I want to share my life with," Amy answered, her voice gentle yet strong at the same time.

Sheldon's eyes widened at her brave confession. He wanted to cry for the deep love and respect he felt for his Amy. He swallowed as his eyes ran over her face, trying to memorize every line and facet of her. One day, she might exit his life in the same way she entered it; in a whirlwind. He had to remember her, just like this…

"Amy…I wish I could be the man you deserve. I'm trying to…so much," He said quietly, and Amy felt her heart squeeze painfully at how much she loved him.

"I know you are, Sheldon. You already _are _the man I deserve. I wish you could believe that."

Sheldon closed his eyes, trying to gather himself. Amy could see he was trying to come to terms with his feelings. She decided not to push him. When he was ready, they would both know. Putting her fingers on his chin, she raised his face to hers.

"Hey…how about I make you the biggest chocolate chip pancakes you've ever seen?" She said sweetly, knowing he wasn't ready for any more heavy talk this morning. Sheldon's face lit up as bright as Broadway at her suggestion.

"Really?" He asked in awe, his sweetness and naivety making her smile.

"Really. Why don't you go and take a shower, and I will start breakfast." She suggested, rising and putting on her robe. Sheldon watched her from the bed, admiring the way she moved. As soon as she closed the door on him, he laid back down and scrubbed a hand across his eyes.

How was it that Amy always knew how to make everything better? He was scared and unsure when he woke up, once again doubting his ability to be the man Amy needed. After what they shared last night, he knew that Amy wanted to reciprocate and touch him, as well. He wanted her to, more than anything. His dreams had been filled of her. What man in his right mind _wouldn't_ want that? A part of him knew that Leonard was right, and he was just not ready. There was nothing wrong with that, right? And yet…he wanted nothing more than to surrender to this longing he felt.

Why had it been so easy for Amy to not only let him pleasure her, but to aide him in doing so? Good Lord…but touching her had been the most wonderful thing he'd ever experienced. The way she looked, the way she felt, the way she _sounded-_taking his hand and guiding him, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Perhaps, it was. It was so damn…sensual.

And it was _him_. Only him, who brought her such pleasure. He still couldn't believe it, even though his eidetic memory flashed the memories in front of his eyes like a movie.

Groaning, he wondered how long he could keep these feelings of longing at bay. He made his way to the bathroom to escape her scent, which had infiltrated his senses once again.

Sheldon felt marginally better after a shower. He needed to gather his chaotic thoughts into some semblance of order before he saw his girlfriend again. Staring at himself in the foggy, steam laden mirror, he tried to understand how it was that Amy could love him so much. _Want_ him so much. Whereas before, those thoughts would be followed up with a cocky, condescending 'Of course she would…I'm Sheldon Cooper'…now, then gave him pause.

How could it be that such a perfect, remarkable creature had set her sights on him? An OCD driven man who had to have his own way in nearly every situation. She could do so much better than him, and yet, he thanked his lucky stars that she came into his life.

He entered her living room to find her puttering in the kitchen, dancing to a song that was obviously in her head since no music was playing. She turned around, startled, meeting his shy gaze.

Good Lord…she looked beautiful this morning. Bright, shining eyes. Rosy cheeks. And she smelled phenomenal. Her luscious scent swirled around the small room, nearly knocking him over.

Pheromones, his hazy mind supplied. His mouth watered, and not just because of the delicious breakfast she was preparing.

"I hope you're hungry, Sheldon." She said, a happy warning in her voice. Sheldon grinned, sitting down at the table.

_He was hungry, alright._

Amy turned around, 2 plates in hand, and stopped in her tracks.

"Oh, you may sit at the coffee table if you wish. I thought you might prefer it," She said kindly, and he glanced over to the couch.

"Really? You don't mind?" He asked her, surprised. Amy shook her head.

"No, not at all. After breakfast, we can decide the agenda for the rest of the day. I know you missed laundry night last night, so if you would like to do that this morning, I understand."

Sheldon stared at his girlfriend, shocked. Laundry night…he had completely forgot about that last night. It wasn't as though he could have done anything about it anyhow; he wasn't allowed back to Los Robles, and he'd forgotten to bring his soiled clothing with him.

What in the world had happened to him? Laundry night's routine was ingrained in him. How on Earth could he have forgotten? One look at his lovely girlfriend, sitting beside him looking so serene, and he realized just how. He had a fantastic day yesterday with Amy, and the spontaneous actions had overshadowed his normal routine.

"Um…I didn't bring my laundry with me. I will just have to do a supplemental wash during the week," He answered, and Amy's shocked eyes swung to his.

"Oh…alright." She answered.

They ate side by side at Amy's coffee table, laughing over the smallest things. These _were_ the biggest pancakes Sheldon had ever eaten, and the most delicious to boot. They were bursting with chocolate chips, and Sheldon was in Heaven.

Everything Amy did, she did to perfection. Sheldon spared a sidelong glance at her as she cut her food into meticulously asymmetrical pieces. A gentle smile bloomed on his face as he studied her.

After shoving a forkful demurely into her mouth, she turned to catch Sheldon watching her with a tender expression.

"What is it?" She asked him quietly, her breath leaving her in a whoosh when he said nothing but moved closer to her, his lips making a gentle pass on the corner of her mouth. For a few seconds, he lingered there, and Amy grew lightheaded.

"You had a little chocolate…right there," He murmured, touching her lip with his finger. Amy was silent as she gazed into his eyes; so blue this morning as they glittered at her. "No sense letting good chocolate go to waste."

His husky voice sent shivers of delight up her back.

"Indeed," She whispered, moving closer to him. Just before her lips touched his own, Amy pulled back. Sheldon stared at her, his face a mask of anticipation. Amy smiled slightly, moving back and resuming her breakfast.

"So…any ideas as to what you'd like to do today?" Amy asked him, chancing at glance in Sheldon's direction.

He did not looked pleased. Amy's inner goddess did a dance at the look of disappointment on her boyfriend's face. She never wanted to cause him stress or discomfort. But she knew, the choice to lower his defenses and want more physical affection from her had to be _his_ choice.

Sheldon cleared his throat, searching the room as he considered her question.

"Well…yesterday we did what I suggested. How about today, you choose?"

Amy smiled widely. "Really?" She asked, stunned.

"Yes," He answered, thinking for certain she may want to go back to the basket weaving museum. "What would you like to do Amy?"

She pretended to consider the question, but in reality, she already had something in mind.

"I'd like to go to the Lego Store." She said enthusiastically.

Two things happened simultaneously: Sheldon nearly choked on the sip of tea in his mouth, and the plate which had been balanced on his lap fell to the carpet.

"W-What?" He stammered, his eyes glazing over as he looked at her. Surely, he must have heard wrong.

Amy turned her face to the side, smiling slyly. Silently, she picked up his empty plate from the floor before the remnants of syrup got everywhere.

"I said, I'd like to visit the Lego Store. It sounds enjoyable. And I know you like it, so it's a win-win situation."

Sheldon gaped at her, not sure he could believe his ears.

"Amy…that's my favorite place in the whole world. Next to Disneyland, of course." He said in awe, and Amy nodded.

"I know, Sheldon."

He felt like the wind was knocked out of him.

"But…you hate the Lego store. You've never wanted to go before," He grasped, his eyes wide and curious. Amy smiled at him, her gaze moving over him from head to toe.

"Correction. I never said I hated the Lego Store. It's just that the last three times you've suggested going, I wasn't in the mood. I'm…in the mood now." She said coyly, lowering her lashes as she stared back at him.

What was she doing to him? He wondered, sweat beginning to break out on his forehead. He narrowed his eyes as he gazed at her, trying to decipher her reasoning. Amy continued to aim her level gaze at him, smiling at his confusion.

"Sheldon, I'm feeling very…generous today." She gave by way of an explanation.

_Generous?_

Sheldon visibly gulped, wondering exactly _how_ generous Amy was feeling.

"Generous?" He repeated, his voice sounding like a pubescent teenager's. Amy's grin widened.

"Yes…generous. I thought you would enjoy the Lego Store, and I have an urge. To go there," She stammered out quickly.

She did have an urge…the urge to push him down on this couch and have her way with him. Every second in his presence was bringing back memories of last night, and how Sheldon brought her more pleasure than she could have ever imagined.

She sat suspended as Sheldon's eyes bore through hers.

"I would love to help you with this urge…to go to the Lego store," He hurriedly said, wincing at how that sounded. Amy laughed, the celestial sound bouncing off of his eardrums.

Sheldon's eyes widened comically. Oh, dear…this vixen…was she flirting with him?

"Good. Then it's settled. I'll go get dressed. Perhaps later after the Lego Store, we can swing by that new train store in Glendale," She said sweetly, rising and taking their breakfast plates to the sink.

She knew _exactly_ what she was doing. Smiling to herself, Amy walked the few paces to the kitchen.

_You can lead a horse to water…but you cannot make him drink. _

Sheldon followed her, stunned.

Chocolate chip pancakes. Lego Store. Train Store…What on Earth was she playing at?

Amy settled the plates on the counter and turned. Sheldon was standing so close to her, that she could hear little pants of air leaving his lips. Looking up, her eyes met his and it was like a match had struck sulfur. He stared down at her, licking his lips.

An unexplainable force had gripped Sheldon, and he could no longer fight it.

"Sheldon-…" She asked quietly, but was cut off when Sheldon pulled her close and lowered his mouth to hers. All thoughts fled as his soft lips met hers. Reaching around her, he lowered his arms to her backside and picked her up at the waist, setting her on her kitchen counter. Amy gasped as he yanked her closer against him. His mouth traced a path up her neck, to her ear, and when he blew warm breath across it she shivered violently.

"What are you doing?" He rasped in her ear, and Amy figured the question was rhetorical. Still, she thought it wise to answer.

"I'm trying to thank you…for last night. You won't let me reciprocate, so I'm going to show you my gratitude in the only way I can." She confessed, her voice husky and playful.

_Good Lord….I'm going to die_, Sheldon thought. Chills broke out all across his body as Amy smiled at him with a sexy smirk. He felt his flesh harden as Amy began to rub his chest absently. He closed his eyes, gritting his teeth against the sensation. Once again, as yesterday, Amy awoke smelling like him. He wondered if this was the way people slowly went insane.

Having opened the Pandora's box that was his libido, he wasn't sure if he could close it up again.

Or if he even wanted to, for that matter.

For 34 years, he'd fought a battle with himself. To remain clinical, scientific, aloof, and indifferent. Feelings were for mere mortals. He was Homo Novus. He was other. He had no time for the pleasures of the flesh, or of the menial. He was going to excel where no other human being had, win a Nobel Prize, and be lauded in the Science journals for eternity.

Then one encounter in a coffee shop changed the trajectory of his entire life. He was completely sidelined by this vixen; so deceptive with her sensible shoes, her whimsical words, and her talented mind. Before he knew what was happening, his heart was lost, his mind putty, and his will completely surrendered.

'_Good Lord…I've turned into Leonard'_, He lamented silently. But that train of thought quickly dispersed as Amy's hand traveled from his chest, to his waist, to his hip. His skin prickled wherever her hand strayed, and he drew in a ragged breath. He opened his eyes to find her gazing at him adoringly, her green eyes shining brightly.

God, he _wanted_ her. So badly. It was like a hot spike being driven into his body. Was this what it was going to be like from now on? This all consuming passion that overtook him, turning him into a rabid animal ready to pounce? How did people ever get work done? Go to school? Carry on productive lives? They hadn't even done…_it_…yet, and all he could think about was when their next encounter would be, and what it would be like. He shuddered, trying to focus on something, anything…that would calm him down. Sheldon swallowed deeply, trying to bring some much needed moisture to his parched throat.

"Talk to me, Sheldon…tell me what you're feeling," Amy whispered, wanting more than anything to connect with him. He's the one who approached her. He's the one who picked her up and put her on this counter. It was clear he wanted something from her. Whatever it was, she would give it to him. Gladly.

"Amy…I…I've been so afraid…" He admitted, only to be halted by her soft lips leaning in to kiss his cheek. His forehead, his chin. He drew his arms around her, pulling her against his tense body. Surely now, she could feel his excitement. Amy didn't seem to mind as she undulated her hips against his. Sheldon let out a hoarse cry, overcome with her softness, her scent…

"I know, Sheldon. I know…but I'm here. I'm here, and I'm yours. Please don't be afraid of me." She said meaningfully. Sheldon closed his eyes as her words washed over him.

"Amy, please…" He rasped again, deeper now. For a split second, Amy thought he was asking her to stop. Until he kissed her back, right on her jugular, sucking on her tender skin. A shiver of delight ran through her body at the sensation.

"Say it, Sheldon. Just ask me." She said gently, rubbing her nose against his in an Eskimo kiss.

Sheldon broke away from her, leaning his head against her shoulder in defeat. He needed her. He wanted her. He loved her.

"I love you so much, Amy. My life was so lonely until I met you. I never even realized it. I couldn't see it. I didn't _want_ to see it…" He whispered, and Amy realized they were on the edge of a great precipice here. She sat still, the hand on his hip not moving. He had to say it. She _needed_ him to say it. She would do nothing until he did. When he leaned into her touch, causing her hand to slide a little lower, Sheldon moaned. Amy could have cried.

"Sheldon…let me love you. Please," She begged him, her voice soft. "Tell me what you want. Tell me what you need. It's yours," She swore, caressing his face as though it were priceless.

His body was literally shaking from want. She met his intense gaze, her breath suspended as she waited.

"You, Amy. I need…you. Touch me. Please, touch me." He moaned, helpless as a newborn.

"Are you sure?" She asked him seriously, lovingly… needing to make sure this was what he really wanted. When he nodded and kissed her neck again, Amy let out a shuddering breath.

God, _yes. _Finally.

She was a novice herself, having never before touched a man intimately. She knew enough from books and anatomy, though. As for the rest, she would rely on instinct alone. Her only thoughts were keeping Sheldon comfortable, and pleasing him as much as he had pleased her.

Amy's hand dipped into the waistband of his lounge pants, and all thoughts quickly came to a halt. He felt just as she expected him to feel. Perfect.

He was hot and hard, and as she gently moved her hand over the fabric covering him, he only grew harder. She was rewarded when he reached around and grabbed her backside, hitching her closer to the edge of the counter.

"Are you alright?" She asked gently, and Sheldon nodded, shivering.

"Don't stop. Please. Don't stop," Sheldon begged thickly, his heavy lidded eyes and at half- mast. Amy kissed him gently. There could be a zombie apocalypse outside the door and she wouldn't stop for anything.

"I won't. I promise. Do you trust me, Sheldon?" She asked, her voice small and full of a need he knew mirrored his own. A loud moan erupted from him and he shifted, drawing himself further into her small hand in answer. With a sharp cry, he surrendered completely.

"With my life," He whispered, and the rare vulnerability he was displaying brought her to her knees. He trusted her. He loved her. He belonged to her.

Amy's heart soared. She moved in as close as their bodies would allow her to continue fondling him, kissing his ear before whispering words of love to him.

"Good. Because I owe you mine. Now we're even," She said tenderly.

Amy moved her hand lower, sliding inside and feeling his flesh for the first time. The way he felt was unbelievable. Amy nearly passed out from the sensations simply touching him evoked.

"Holy…Christ," He murmured, his eyes rolling back in his head as her soft hand moved from base to tip slowly, learning him. He gripped the flesh of her backside tightly, frightened at the level of pleasure he felt from her novice touch. It wasn't supposed to feel this good. How did she even know what to do? She was a virgin. Perhaps her scientific knowledge served her better than he thought.

It was the first time another hand had touched him so intimately in his entire life. He closed his eyes, lest he come there and then. He rolled his hips upward, encouraging her caresses. Amy needed little encouragement, though.

He remembered the first time he viewed her as a woman, and not just a friend. At the bar, before they danced for the first time. She slid up against him, tipsy and flirtatious, and pursed her lips for a kiss. He stared at her in shock, realizing that her mouth was so sensual. And that he was in serious trouble.

Now, a lifetime later, she moved closer to him, reaching in further, and caressed the length of him with a maddening slowness. A silky drop of fluid formed on his tip, then another, until she felt enough lubrication to tend the task at hand with his comfort and pleasure secure.

Sheldon stood there paralyzed, yet his hips of their own accord moved and met her, stroke for stroke, as she closed her hand around him into a firm fist and began to work his flesh into a frenzy. Leaning over, she carefully lowered his pants and underwear slowly as to not startle him. His eyes flew open as the sudden cool air came in contact with him, and he realized she was viewing his naked flesh.

Amy's eyes widened, as she took in the man she loved. He was beautiful. His more than generous length was swollen for her, waiting for her touch, and her mouth watered at how lucky she was. Sheldon simply stood still, watching her, dying a slow death. Did she like what she saw?

"Oh, Sheldon. You are magnificent," She whispered, returning to her task, this time using both hands- one to fondle his testicles and the other to continuing to caress him.

"That feels…incredible. Oh…Amy. Oh," He moaned, the husky timbre of his voice sending a jolt of desire to Amy's already growing wetness. She felt on the verge of another orgasm, simply from witnessing his pleasure. Good grief, but seeing Sheldon writhing around in ecstacy made her wetter than she had ever been in her life. Watching her own hands bring him pleasure was like watching a decadent movie that only she was audience to. Leaning over him, she whispered in his ear.

"You are mine, Dr. Cooper. Only mine." She whispered hotly, loving the sounds coming out of Sheldon's mouth.

Sheldon bit his lip harshly, throwing his head back as his beloved Amy brought him to rapture. She stroked him up and down, His eyes never leaving hers as she teased and tormented him, drawing out every secret desire he had ever felt or imagined. He was lost, never to be found again. Every thought was gone, save the feeling of what her hands were doing to him. He wanted to touch her, wanted to feel her. She was so far away from him…too far. The most connection he could have with her, was to entangle his hands in her long, silky hair.

"Amy, please…faster. Oh god…faster." He begged, torn between what his body was demanding and what his logic was demanding. She looked in his dear face, so overcome with passion and love, and kissed him fiercely. She thrust her tongue into his mouth in sensual abandon, speeding up her efforts until she felt him swell and grow larger in her hand.

"Oh, Sheldon… you feel wonderful," She whispered in his ear, before her eyes wandered down to where she was fondling him so lovingly. She wanted to faint from the beautiful sight her eyes beheld.

Never in her life had she felt so empowered, so wanted. So _needed_. Her man needed her. Only she could give him what he craved. Amy squirmed as the feelings of pleasure from giving him pleasure transferred to her. She was shaking from arousal and the knowledge that she was bringing Sheldon to orgasm.

"Yes…you feel so good. Your hands…Oh, god…Amy…" He whimpered, having a hard time keeping upright. Suddenly, he knew the end was coming and he couldn't stand another minute. Dragging her legs around him, he carried her the short distance to the couch and fell onto it, Amy falling on top of him clumsily. She continued to stroke him steadily, relishing the way his eyes rolled backwards.

"I want to give you everything, Sheldon. I love you so much." Amy said with conviction. "Let go. I want you to. I want to feel you. Let me feel you…please," She begged, and he was done for.

Sheldon moaned loudly, his head lobbing back into the arm of the coach. Then he was coming apart, emptying himself into her hand and flying towards the sun like Icarus. Sheldon growled so loudly, the entire room vibrated, and he took his previously idle hands and grabbed Amy's face roughly, kissing her like a madman. The couch shook as he changed their positioning, pinning her down while he kissed a path down her throat. Her smooth, silky legs encircled his waist, allowing him to press into her completely. He could feel her heated core, and he snapped.

"Forgive me," He groaned as he rode out his orgasm, pressing against her and absorbing her cries. She was so turned on by her ministrations to him, so wet…she came as soon as he ground his deflating manhood against her sensitive body. He didn't enter her; he didn't have to. The sensation was enough to turn her into a blithering mess. They both panted as the aftershocks died down, breathing each other's breath and knitted so tightly together that they could feel the other's heartbeat.

God, what had he done? His body throbbed everywhere, his blood was on fire, his pulse out of control. Normally, such reactions would send him hurtling toward the nearest emergency room. This, though…

This… was a feeling of such ecstasy, that he was helpless to fight against it. The waves washed over him, heavy and fierce, and he finally succumbed to the weight. He was a man, and she was his woman. And this, this…was everything.

"I…I think…" He tried, only to groan as she shifted her hips slightly and he slid against her. He tried again.

"Yes…" She murmured, and he wasn't sure if she was agreeing with him or not.

"I think, I would like to alter the paradigm of our relationship agreement. Again," He panted, burying his face into her neck. Amy whimpered, her body shaking like a leaf as she carefully put one of her arms across his back, and the other dangerously close to his ass.

"Alright," She said breathlessly. "What do you propose?"

Sheldon gathered his wits, trying to speak without wheezing. His eyes met hers, and he felt the most profound joy split his heart.

"I propose…we do that. As much as possible. Over and over, until we perfect it." He whispered, his lips kissing her cheeks, her nose, her lips…

Amy had no reservations. In fact, she was quite happy to expand her knowledge. As a scientist, she could totally see how that would be beneficial. After all, practice made perfect.

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The day passed in a blur for the couple. After cleaning up (separately, as the thought of doing so with Amy sent Sheldon into a tailspin) they got dressed and headed out to the Lego Store. Sheldon couldn't take his eyes off of Amy on the way, watching her in awe. Seeing her in _his _element, having a Lego stand-off with some teenagers made his body quiver. She was amazing.

They toured the entire store, Amy surprising him by buying him a miniature model R2D2.

True to her word, they checked out the train store in Glendale, and he felt like a kid again, roaming the aisles with her looking at the models.

They ended up having lunch in the park; it was an overcast day and quite windy, and they enjoyed watching the children out with their kites. Sheldon held Amy's hand, stealing shy glances at her. It was official: He was a hippy. There was no other explanation for the feeling of joy floating through his veins.

Although the intimacy was relatively new, and neither one wanted to push things beyond their limit, it was clear to both of them that there had been a massive shift this weekend. Upon returning back to Amy's, they spent a quiet day watching TV. Amy finally relented and allowed Sheldon to put Firefly on and together they watched the first six episodes. Sheldon was happy to share this with her, and she really seemed to enjoy it.

Amy would never have imagined that this weekend would take the turn that it did. She had no intentions of forcing the issue with their intimacy; as it turned out, Sheldon was the one all weekend who set the pace, allowing the Physicist the control he so desperately needed. Amy was more than fine with that. She had longed for an intimate relationship with her boyfriend for years, knowing full well that he needed time to adjust to his new feelings, and the task of bringing those feelings to fruition. Knowing that he had finally worked through some of his fears and was allowing her access to his most guarded place…his heart…made her own heart soar and swell and nearly fly from her didn't matter that intercourse was probably a long way off. It wasn't about sex. It was about intimacy.

She knew that things would not just suddenly change with Sheldon. While their situation had dramatically changed, she was no fool. This was Sheldon Cooper. He would still be the OCD, overbearing, meticulously ordered man she had fallen in love with. He would still be demanding, neurotic, and probably sarcastic. But she knew with every fiber of her being, she loved him despite of those things. She wasn't perfect, either. Together, they could do anything.

When Amy pulled up to 2311 Los Robles, it was pelting with rain. Sheldon glanced out of the window, then back to her.

"I don't think I want to get out just yet. Do you mind if I wait a few minutes until the rain dies down?" He asked, as Amy shut off the engine.

"No. Not at all, Sheldon. Stay as long as you'd like. I'm in no rush to return home." She said truthfully.

Sheldon smiled at her, his eyes roaming over her face. He was loath to leave her car at all, after the weekend they'd shared. But it was Sunday evening and work tomorrow beckoned. He noticed when they drove up that the tenting was gone from the building, an obvious sign the exterminators had finished on schedule this afternoon as they had planned. He wondered if Leonard and Penny were already back.

Sheldon supposed he had termites to thank for his new found intimacy with Amy. The thought made him simultaneously want to grimace and grin. He was being ridiculous.

Amy sat there, fiddling with the radio dial, and tried desperately not to say something stupid. She was afraid that Sheldon would think her clingy now, or want to put expectations upon him that he wasn't ready for. In truth, she had no idea where they went from here. He had spent the weekend literally rocking her world in so many ways; yet she was hesitant to label it one way or the other. She felt she should just allow this to unfold as she had done already. Slow and steady wins the race.

His voice startled her out of her wandering thoughts.

"Would you like to come up and watch a movie with me, Amy?" Sheldon asked, his voice heavy with something Amy couldn't name. When she met his gaze, the yearning in his eyes floored her. She swallowed heavily. It wasn't like Sheldon to want her company so badly. Normally, he was relieved when their time together was over and he could be left to his thoughts again. At least that's what she always assumed. Staring at his expectant face, however, now Amy wasn't so certain.

"Um…it's Sunday night. I know you'd like to get ready for the week ahead. Won't that infringe upon your private time?" She asked.

Sheldon frowned at her question, tilting his head to study her.

"Well, yes it's Sunday. And I would watch a movie whether you accompanied me upstairs or not. I would rather have you with me than not." He answered, his voice vulnerable.

Then a thought popped into his head which made his frown deepen.

"Unless, you are tired of my company and would rather be alone now?"

Amy stared at him open mouthed.

"No! I would love to come upstairs with you. I…just don't want you to get tired of _me_, that's all. You've endured the whole weekend in my apartment, away from your things. I only thought you wanted to get back to a degree of normalcy."

Sheldon gaped at her, his heart beating wildly in his chest. The confusion of her statement echoed in his ears.

Tired of her?

He felt like he couldn't get _enough_ of her. All he wanted was to drag her upstairs and lock her in his room. It was like one Sheldon Cooper left his apartment Friday afternoon, only to replaced by a replicate two days later. He seriously considered he was stuck in the plotline for Invasion of the Body Snatchers. The feel of her body and the sounds of her passionate cries still surrounded every fiber of his being. His body shook with the remembrance of her touch, his mind conjured up the timber of her voice. It was madness. Didn't she feel that same way? Wasn't she as confused, as spellbound as he was?

Then the realization dawned, fast and furious. Sheldon looked away, not able to face her. Of course she would think that way. Their whole relationship had been based upon _his_ wants, _his_ terms, and _his_ choices. The Sheldon of old would have been out of this car as soon as it hit the curb, anxious to get back to the sanctuary of his own space, sending Amy off with a pat on the head and a curt 'thanks for your hospitality'. His failures glared him in face with a spotlight as he finally understood where she had been coming from all of these years. All she ever wanted was his company, his affection, and his time. He made her wait so long for any scrap of notice, and he felt ashamed.

His mouth was dry, but he swallowed against the pain in his throat.

"Amy…I could never be tired of you. It's you who should be tired of me. I don't…I know…I haven't been the epitome of a model boyfriend. My only excuse is that I've had many issues to work through to arrive at this point. I know it's been hard on you, having patience with me. And I know you could probably do much better. But I ask you now…please don't give up on me."

Tears gathered in Amy's eyes as she listened to Sheldon's impassioned speech. He looked so unsure of himself, so worried. She hated the fact he was _still_ questioning whether or not she would just leave him. Hadn't she proved that she was in this for the long haul? Sometimes, for a genius, Sheldon could be so obtuse. But as his large eyes scanned her face in trepidation, she knew she could not chide him. He was trying so hard to accommodate her, and she loved him all the more for that.

Turning and giving him her full attention, she gingerly took his hand in hers. He stared at their entwined hands for a beat before tightening his grip.

"I will never give up on you, Sheldon. I promise. You don't have to work so hard to please me, either. We have no race to win, here."

Sheldon smiled his most perfect koala smile. The _real_ koala smile, which radiated outward from his soul. Amy marveled at how his entire face lit up, his eyes bluer than ever. He blushed and look back to their hands, not knowing what else to say. Luckily, Amy took the task from him.

"So…do you have the new Wolverine film upstairs? I wouldn't mind watching that one." She said slyly, loving how his eyes shot to hers and there was a momentary look of surprise in his.

"Wolverine? You want to watch an X-Men film?" He asked in disbelief, his pulse racing as he watched a smile bloom on Amy's face. It was probably because she wanted to gaze at Hugh Jackman's naked chest.

"Yes, I would. Unless of course you'd like to watch Sex and the City. I hear there is a marathon on oxygen tonight…"

Sheldon winced, shaking his head frantically.

"Um…no. Wolverine is fine."

Amy turned toward the window to hide her smile. She noted that the rain was slowing down, and figured it was the best time to make their move.

"I think we should make a run for it while we can. Are you ready?" She asked, reaching in the backseat for a large umbrella. Sheldon took a deep breath.

"Ready…" He repeated, and Amy had the suspicion he wasn't talking about jumping out of this car.

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They drank hot cocoa, munched on popcorn, and held hands. Nothing out of the ordinary on a typical date night. Except this wasn't a date night. And this was no ordinary couple.

As it turned out, Amy didn't really want to watch Wolverine for Hugh Jackman's bare chest. She honestly wanted to see the film. Sheldon beamed with happiness. The fact his girlfriend was interested in any part of his fandom made him want to jump up and down with joy.

Now if he could only get her to like Star Trek…

Putting their mugs in the sink Amy looked up to find Sheldon sitting on a stool watching her. She hadn't heard him follow her into the kitchen.

"What is it?" She asked, and Sheldon just put his chin in his palm, smiling wider.

"Amy…I had a really good weekend."

He was blushing, his pale skin bloomed a very becoming shade of pink. She found the fact a 34 year old man blushed endearing.

Amy shook her head, deliriously happy. "Yeah…I had a wonderful weekend too."

Sheldon bit his bottom lip, his eyes searching hers for something. The look he was giving her made her weak in the knees. What was he _doing_ to her lately? Sheldon Cooper gazing at her with bedroom eyes? Sheldon cooper unnerving her with a lip bite? Sheldon cooper making her orgasm…

"It's…late. I'd better go. Walk me out?" She asked, blushing herself now like mad. Sheldon swung his long legs off the stool gracefully, following her. Amy made to open the door, but Sheldon put his hand on the knob. He moved closer to her, trapping her against the door. Amy's breath hitched in her throat as he lowered his head to hers.

"Will you call me when you get home, so I know you arrived safely?" He asked quietly, his eyes pinning her where she stood.

"You know I will," She answered, feeling herself drawing closer to Sheldon by some invisible thread. His eyes slid down to her mouth, blinking slowly.

"Goodnight," He whispered, kissing her so softly that Amy thought she imagined it. When it was finished, he straightened up, reached behind her opening the door. All the while, his eyes never left hers. It took every ounce of strength to turn and go. But once out in the hall, she let out the breath she was holding, slumping backwards against his door. She needed to catch her breath before she got behind the wheel again. Breathing deeply, she tried to calm herself, but the knowledge Sheldon was on the other side of that door wasn't making it easy.

They had made incredible progress this weekend. Amy could only smile. Good Lord…but he was going to be the death of her.

What a way to go.

A/N- Thank you for reading. I wanted to ease into this with Sheldon; after all, this was the first time he's ever experienced anything like it. Next chapter, he will REALLY let go and feel comfortable with Amy touching him. I feel I should mention, on a personal note, that my Mother-in-Law is very ill and in hospital. She had surgery yesterday, and my husband and I are spending a lot of time with her. She is in ICU recovering. I will try to edit my next chapter and post it as soon as possible. If I'm not around a lot the next week, that is why. Please keep us in your thoughts; it's been a rough week. X


	28. Chapter 28

~Chapter 28~

A/N- I am overwhelmed by the love you've all shown me, personally and with this story. Thank you. I hope this chapter goes a long way to show you how much I love you back. This is the Sheldon that I have always longed to see; the Sheldon I know is in there somewhere. Close your eyes, and just imagine. Or, pretend you are Amy. *winks* I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…You're the whisper of a summer breeze. You're the kiss that puts my soul at ease. What I'm saying is, I'm into you…here's my story and the story goes- you give love, you'll get love, and more than Heaven knows…." Paula Abdul – Rush Rush

Howard, Leonard, and Raj took their seats in the cafeteria. Sheldon was holed up in his office with Alex trying to finish an important paper Dr. Gablehauser was waiting for. With his absence, it was the perfect time to pose the topic Howard knew was on everyone's mind.

"Have you guys noticed how strange Sheldon has been acting the last few weeks?"

Leonard and Raj exchanged bemused looks at Howard's question.

"Well, no more than usual. Although I found it out of character that he didn't want to call an emergency meeting to revise the Roommate Agreement after I forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste yesterday," Leonard said, laughing, before digging in to his salad. Raj smirked knowingly.

"I know why he's been acting so strange. He's been bitten by the love bug. I think it's beautiful." Raj said dreamily. Howard scrunched up his face in agreement.

"He's been bitten by something. But I don't know how to take this 'new' Sheldon. He's freaking me out a little. I'm not used to seeing Sheldon smiling all of the time. And yesterday? I caught him whistling." Howard said, incredulity in his voice. This made Leonard sit up and drop his fork.

"Sheldon Cooper whistling? Get out of here. I'm not even allowed to whistle at home when I'm alone. Are you sure?" Leonard asked.

Howard nodded vigorously.

"I heard him. I stopped by his office to drop off some documents President Siebert asked me to bring him, and his door was ajar. He was whistling. Swear to God," Howard said, mimicking the Boy Scout salute.

Leonard narrowed his eyes. Something was definitely up.

"What was he whistling? Did you recognize the tune?" Raj asked, and both Howard and Leonard stared at him.

"No, I didn't recognize the tune!" Howard spat, exasperated. "The point is, Sheldon is not his usual self. I know the last few months have really changed him, but it's been crazy since you guys had your building tented. Don't you remember that Monday afternoon afterward, he bought us all lunch in the cafeteria?" Howard intoned, and the two men nodded.

"He and Amy must have had _some_ weekend," Raj cooed, raising his brows in a sexy gesture. Howard looked to Leonard for confirmation.

"Did he say anything about that to give you that impression?"

Leonard shrugged.

"Well, he was in his room by the time Penny and I came back that Sunday night. He seemed alright the next morning, though, if not a little tired.

Suddenly, a lightbulb went off. Leonard and Howard looked at each other in curiosity. Howard shook his head in the negative, while Leonard narrowed his eyes, then raised his brows, considering.

Maybe…

Nah. No way. Not Sheldon.

_Right?_

Howard was the first to speak.

"Well…Amy survived him being there, anyway. Come to think of it…_She's_ been acting stranger than usual as well."

Raj's eyes went wide.

"Home girl _has_ been acting different…" Raj said thoughtfully. Both men looked at him strangely.

"Home girl, Raj?" Howard questioned. "Amy lives in Glendale, not Compton."

Raj shot Howard a glare. "Hey, it's just a term of endearment. Like when I call you my 'brotha from another motha'."

Howard shook his head at his Indian friend's antics.

"Anyway, back to Earth…Leonard, you don't think that they….you know." Howard trailed off suggestively, and Leonard shook his head.

"I doubt it. But _something_ must have happened. Sheldon Cooper does _not_ whistle. He loathes the practice so much, it's forbidden in the apartment. I think at one point, he tried to pass a motion that the entire building couldn't even do it."

Howard mulled it over, shrugging.

"What is this obsession you have with whistling? Give it a rest, already." Howard said, annoyed.

Leonard glared at his plate. "That's because you don't have someone forbidding you to do it." He countered, equally annoyed.

"Well, It looks like our little guy is growing up," Raj said, wiping a mock tear. "You always think you're prepared for them to leave the nest, until they do."

Leonard and Howard rolled their eyes at each other.

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Three weeks had passed since what Sheldon would dub 'The Termite Incident of 2015'.

Sheldon and Amy had grown closer, and everyone had taken notice. It was only subtle changes, but for the formerly staid pair, those changes were blindingly obvious.

Neither one of them had suggested another sleep over, though. And that was fine. After the monumental shift that weekend, they were in no hurry. The desires were there, though.

Good grief…_were_ they there.

Amy found herself hesitant to wash her sheets and pillowcases because they carried his delicious scent. The first few nights after their weekend, she slept hugging his pillow to her, inhaling the trace of his talc and cologne. She could still feel his warmth in her bed, and as she drifted off to sleep she imagined his arms around her tightly.

Many times throughout the day, she contemplated leaving her lab to head over to Sheldon's office and surprise him with lunch, or something more…but his office was clear across campus, and she had a very heavy workload at present.

Sheldon fared no better; waking up alone Monday morning made him realize just how accustomed he was becoming to her presence. Suddenly his empty bed felt cold and lonely. He chided himself for acting this way; after all, he was A Scientist. He didn't deal well with emotions. This was becoming ridiculous. And yet…

He couldn't hide the fact that he thought of Amy, day and night.

They skyped every night and Sheldon found he was desperate by the end of the day to see her face, hear her voice, and look into her eyes.

Sheldon found that from his third floor office window, he could see across campus to the biology labs windows. He knew which window belonged to Amy, and he would often find himself staring out the window in hopes of spying her somehow.

Good Lord…He was a full-fledged hippy now. He had traded in his Buster Brown's for Birkenstocks. His tie die t- shirt was on order though.

It was their Thursday date night now, and Sheldon had asked Amy over to discuss an important matter. Amy inquired if they would be dining out, and Sheldon said no. He asked her if she would pick up some food for them to share at his apartment.

Sheldon stared at the document which lay in front of him on his coffee table. 31 pages of rules, regulations, demands, and compromises. Endless addendums. The most important to him being the one he had just comprised. He stared at the papers, bound in laminate and carefully spiraled together with nary a wrinkle or a scratch.

The Relationship Agreement-his tangible grounding tool to all things related to Amy Farrah Fowler.

He had a copy in his I Pad, of course. But there was something about the written word that was completely indisputable. It wasn't just words hanging out there in cyberspace. It was there, on paper for the world to view.

Amy would be here soon. He was terrified that when she saw his new stipulations, she would tell him that the relationship was over. He was uncertain of so many things - but he knew this was the correct course of action. And if Amy agreed, they could move forward. He hadn't yet thought about what would happen if she refused.

He decided he would jump off that bridge when they came to it. Sitting back in his spot heavily, his eyes scanned the document again.

He hadn't come to this decision lightly. It had taken him three days of careful consideration, weighing all of the pros and cons, for him to arrive at his current state of being. But now, sitting here staring at the facts, he was uncertain once again.

Why? He knew Amy wanted to move things forward. So why did this fear continue to flourish in the pit of his stomach?

'_Because you are petrified. You have too much to lose now'_, His mind supplied.

The evidence did seem to support that. His palms were sweaty, his heart was racing, and he felt dizzy. Either he was afraid, or there was a poltergeist in the room. Sheldon jumped up, pacing the floor.

That weekend together changed everything. She knew, he was certain, of the conclusions he had come to. She didn't push him, though. Didn't demand an answer. She was so wonderful, in that way. Well, in every way. But especially that way. He felt more comfortable with her than anyone on Earth, save his Meemaw. He couldn't wait for the day the two women he adored would meet face to face. He knew Meemaw would love her as much as he did. That truth warmed him from the inside out.

Sitting here, thinking about her, warmed him as well. He was no longer a stranger to touching Amy. He knew now how she felt. How she sounded. How she smelled. If he closed his eyes, he could actually _feel_ her. At night, alone in his bed, he only had to think of her and the memory of her gentle hands bringing him to orgasm had him hard and panting. His own hand was a poor substitute now. Rather than feeling dirty or ashamed at his sexual awakening, he felt invigorated. Alive.

_Horny_.

He desired Amy. _Truly_ desired her. The day was coming where he would surrender completely to her. Even though this tentative journey was titillating in its own way and had every nerve ending poised for contact, he couldn't stop his mind from wandering down other avenues.

What would it feel like to make love to her? To be buried deep inside of her and not only witness her reaching her climax, but _feeling_ it? How would she feel, so tight around him? The pleasure must be out of this world, he surmised, closing his eyes and biting his lip.

_Pull yourself together, man!_ He demanded, coming back to himself and clearing his throat. Now was not the time to wallow in these thoughts. Amy would be here any minute.

Leonard came out of his room, attaching his watch to his wrist and eyeing Sheldon in concern. He was red in the face and looked agitated.

"Everything okay?" He asked cautiously, and Sheldon just nodded his head.

"Amy's on her way. I'm…" He stopped, looking at Leonard with a look that had the shorter man frowning.

"Sheldon, are you alright? You look frazzled, even for you."

Sheldon rolled his eyes, shaking his head once again.

"Leonard, I'm fine. I just…have a lot to discuss with Amy tonight. I'm nervous, is all."

Leonard patted him on the back gently.

"Listen, Sheldon. You and Amy have a great thing going. Just let it happen. Don't push it, and don't analyze it to death. Okay?"

Sheldon stared at Leonard, dumbfounded.

"Don't analyze it? How is that prudent? It must be viewed through rational-"

Leonard cut his friend off with a gentle smile.

"Sheldon…it will alright. Just go with your instincts. Trust your heart. I'll see you tomorrow. I'm spending the night with Penny after we come home."

He waved at Sheldon, leaving quietly.

Sheldon snorted. _My heart_. That is a bunch of hippy dippy nonsense, he decided. His _heart_ was precisely the reason he was in this mess. If he had just kept to his chosen course, he would be fine. Instead, he found himself in unchartered waters.

Now wasn't the time to relent or second guess. He owed her this much. And he wanted to do this, he decided. So when she knocked in her brisk way, he opened the door and smiled widely.

God, she looked beautiful. She smelled beautiful. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea, he feared. Maybe a public place with lots of people was a better setting.

"Good evening, Sheldon. It's so good to see you," She said sweetly, stepping inside and kissing his cheek swiftly. Sheldon froze, his eyes following her as she went to sit on the couch in her spot next to his after putting the bag which held their dinner down on the island.

Sheldon wasted no time, getting down to brass tacks.

"Amy…the reason I wanted to have dinner in tonight is because…I've made some amendments to the relationship agreement which I hope you will agree to."

In the blink of an eye, Amy's face went from serene to worried.

"And what are these amendments?" She asked, obvious fear in her voice. Sheldon hated hearing it.

He cleared his throat noisily.

"The amendments entail a two part alteration. The first, concerns date night. At present, we have one date night per week, on Thursday. I would like, if you are of a mind, to change that to every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday night," He rushed out.

Amy gaped at him.

Every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday? Her breath left her in a rush, and she grabbed the couch cushion beneath her for support.

Sheldon frowned as he watched the physical change in Amy; this was what he feared most of all. That he was too pushy, too clingy, and that she was perfectly happy with their current arrangement. He began to curse himself for not thinking this through more clearly when Amy began to laugh. A rich, melodic sound that shot through Sheldon like a heavenly chorus. He watched her closely, trying to ascertain her mood.

"Amy…are you alright?" He asked softly, cautiously, afraid that he was imagining things when Amy's face broke out in a beautiful smile.

"I'm fine, Sheldon. Are you sure about this? Is this really what you want?" She asked with hope, afraid to even believe her ears.

Sheldon let out a relieved breath, returning her smile.

"Amy…Yes. I'm very sure. I find that my…_our_…current situation is not enough anymore. If we are to continue moving forward on the correct path, we need to spend more time together as a couple. You are still welcome to join us for dinner during the week any time you choose, of course. Except game nights, in which case, none of the ladies will be here. But I think it best to increase our date nights. And I think it's best that we include things you want to do as well. I shouldn't be the only way benefiting from our time together. I've been rather selfish in that vein," He said in shame, his voice lowering. "Does that idea meet with your approval?"

Amy couldn't believe her ears. She sat there, unable to move or speak. They were really doing this. They were really moving forward, as he promised, and he was trying-_more_ than trying. Tears began to gather in her eyes, and she turned away as to not upset Sheldon.

"Have I upset you?" He asked her quietly, terrified of the answer.

"No, Sheldon. I am just so overwhelmed that you want to do this."

"Oh," He whispered, still not reading her correctly. Did that mean she was happy about the change? Or was she trying to get out of it now? Moments passed as they sat there staring at one another. Finally, Amy broke the silence.

"Um…you stated there were two new amendments. What is the second?"

Sheldon's eyes grew wide as Amy looked at him expectantly. He wondered if it were too late to run to his room and hide under the bed. Then Leonard's voice rang in his head, drowning out everything else.

…_follow your heart…_

He tilted his head, taking a deep breath.

"The second amendment is that we incorporate more…intimacy…into our time together."

The words came out breathy, Sheldon keeping his eyes focused on his hands.

"Intimacy?" Amy questioned, her own voice sounding raspy. Sheldon looked up and caught her staring at his lips. He took another deep breath.

"Yes. Intimacy. And not just at the end of date night. But…whenever we feel like it. To be technical…kissing, hugging, um…touching," He trailed off, a lump in his throat suddenly halting his speech. Amy's own breathing had stilted, and she reached up a hand to rub her neck.

"I see…so, I could just touch you…kiss you whenever the whimsy overcomes me?" She whispered, taking a gamble and putting her hand on his thigh. To his credit, he didn't freak out like he did the morning after their sleepover. He didn't move at all. He simply closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of her warm palm on his leg.

"What is life without whimsy?" He reasoned, his voice lower than ever. "If we find ourselves in a situation where it gets to be too intense, then we can…let nature take its course."

Amy stared at Sheldon in shock. Was he proposing what she thought he was?

He sheepishly raised his eyes to hers, apprehension evident.

"Sheldon…I would never rush you into anything you weren't ready for," She said with conviction. Her honesty and care for him touched him deeply.

"And…I would never rush _you_ into anything, Amy. I hope you know how much I care for you. I respect you more than anyone else," He said tenderly.

"I know that, Sheldon. You are the most honorable man I've ever known."

Hearing those words from her, directed at him, made his chest swell with pride. The trouble was, the thoughts going through is head were _anything_ but honorable.

They each moved closer to each other as if pulled by magnetic force. Amy reached up and caressed Sheldon's jaw, and Sheldon turned his face into her palm. He watched her, marveling at how beautiful she was.

"I accept the terms of the agreement." She whispered softly.

Sheldon's face broke out in a beautiful smile and Amy mimicked him.

"Oh, Amy…" He whispered, wanting nothing more than to hold her. And as per the newly revised Relationship Agreement, he could. So he did. He pulled her to him, throwing his arms around her and rubbing her back in long, sensual strokes. Amy closed her eyes and absorbed the feelings he was evoking inside of her.

God, she loved this man.

"Amy…may I ask you a question, in keeping in line with our newfound agreement?" He asked her quietly, and Amy nodded slowly.

"Yes, Sheldon. Of course."

Her body broke out in a cold sweat as she caught the look in his eyes.

"Will you…I want…I'd like you to….um…." He stuttered, not able to articulate his thoughts. Amy put her hand on his jaw tenderly.

"Sheldon, it's okay. Just ask me."

He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

"Will you come with me into my bedroom? I'd like to…what did you call it once? Make out?" He stammered, his voice cracking.

Amy's eyes widened to the size of flying saucers.

_Whoa….teach a man to fish, and all that. _

"I know I've previously held firm to the rule, not girls allowed in my room. I am happy to abolish that rule. Just for you though, Dr. Fowler. You are the only exception," He said sweetly.

Amy's face broke out in rosy blush.

"I've been in there before, Sheldon, four times, in fact."

Sheldon waggled his brows playfully.

"You are right, Amy. Care to make it five?"

She narrowed her eyes, a grin breaking out upon her soft lips.

"Just what do you want to show me in your room that I haven't seen already?" She asked, and in answer, Sheldon leaned in and kissed her neck. Amy moaned.

Sheldon smiled wickedly.

"You'll have to join me to find out."

Amy answered the only way she knew how.

"Hoo…"

Sheldon grabbed her hand, and they ran toward his bedroom, Sheldon flinging open the door and shoving her inside playfully. Amy grabbed his waist, backing him into the bed. He fell down with a whoosh, his long body spanning the bed. Amy stood above him, watching his appealing body so helpless below her. She removed her shoes, then her cardigan, and surprised him by climbing on top of him.

"Oomph," He managed, eliciting a laugh from Amy.

"I've got you right where I want you, Dr. Cooper," She said alluringly, licking her lips for emphasis. Sheldon swallowed noisily.

"Amy…what in Heaven's name are you doing?" He chastised, making no real effort to pull her off. In anything, he sank further into the bed to allow her to fully climb on top of him.

"I'm exercising my right as the girlfriend to subdue my boyfriend-article 6, section 24. It's there in black and white," She said, removing her glasses and placing them on Sheldon's nightstand. He gazed up into her eyes.

"Is that so? And what if I protest? Will you use brute force?" He questioned, his heart beginning to pound a staccato beat. Without realizing it, he put his hands on her thighs. His touch was electric, and Amy moaned quietly as his palms slid upward.

"No…no force. I will never force the unwilling," She said seriously, her lips curling into a shy smile.

Sheldon's eyes dipped to her legs straddling him. He longed for the day when there would be nothing between them. He wanted to touch her to the point of insanity.

"Well…what if the boyfriend_ is_ willing?" He asked quietly, looking at her from under his amazing lashes. Amy's body was on high alert, every cell standing at attention.

Brazenly, she began to unbutton her blouse. She removed four buttons from their enclosures before focusing on Sheldon. She had on no undershirt, and when she leaned forward she afforded Sheldon a good view of her ample cleavage. His eyes lowered to take in the view, pupil's dilating as he noticed purple lace come into focus. He bit his lip.

"If the boyfriend is willing, then the girlfriend is amiable." She whispered in his ear, relishing the way he shivered at her touch. It made her feel powerful and beautiful, knowing she affected him this way.

"Is that a fact, Dr. Fowler? What proof can you offer me to convince me of your…amiability? I should think I need further convincing. After all, I am a genius. Nothing gets past me easily", He whispered seductively.

Amy's eyes seared through Sheldon.

"You will just have to trust me, Dr. Cooper."

Sheldon continued to stroke her thighs, running his palms up toward her hips. He loved it when she didn't wear tights, and her amazing legs were on display for him. Having newly discovered how soft her skin was, he thrilled at the picture his big hands created on her pale flesh. Amy closed her eyes as his sensual caress went higher. When they reached the juncture of her thighs, Amy's breath caught in her throat as he lifted her skirt a tad to display her to his hungry gaze.

"Mmm…Sheldon…your touch sets me on fire," She admitted, her voice high and wispy.

He watched her, enraptured, as her eyes closed and she moaned.

"Do you like that, Amy? Does my touch please you?" He whispered, his thumbs skirting dangerously close to her panties. He purposely skimmed over the lace, barely touching her.

Amy watched the sensual caress he gave her, marveling at how sexy his hands were.

"God, you know it does. I dream about these hands, Sheldon. Please, don't stop," She begged. It thrilled Sheldon to know that he aroused her.

"Your skin is so soft. I love touching it. I think it's my new favorite obsession," He admitted, shocking himself more than Amy.

In response to his sensual words Amy rocked her hips, grounding down against Sheldon's burgeoning erection. He groaned, grabbing her hips to steady her. She did it again, this time sliding down a bit. Everywhere they touched, fire erupted. A guttural groan escaped his lips as Amy swiveled her hips three times. Sheldon's eyes rolled back in his head. He was quickly losing all control, all rational thought.

"What are you doing to me?" He gritted out, his voice sounding like sandpaper. The sound shot straight to Amy's core.

"I don't even recognize myself anymore," He lamented, the pain in his voice apparent. "All I want is feel your body next to mine. I want to touch you, Amy. I want to make you call my name again. I can't sleep without dreaming of you. I can't work without wondering what you're doing. You are everywhere," He whined. "I never expected this. I never _wanted _this. But now…I can't stop it. God help me, I can't stop."

It was time to be equally honest with him. Hearing Sheldon speak so bluntly and so full of lust did things to her that she never imagined. The idea of her prim and robotic boyfriend actually having sexual feelings stirred every primal instinct inside of her. She'd longed for him for years. Now he knew what it felt like to long for something so badly.

Quid pro quo.

"I will tell you what I'm doing, Dr. Cooper. I'm taking what's mine," She said with conviction, startling him into silence. Hearing her stake her claim on him was the hottest, most sensual thing he had ever heard. He swallowed as he watched her resume her task of unbuttoning her blouse, peeling it down her arms and then flinging it on the floor. Old habits die hard, and he found his eyes following the trajectory of the garment, thinking it would wrinkle. But that thought quickly flew out the window when Amy's purple push up bra to came into full view.

"Dear Lord," He yelped, his eyes straying to the tantalizing flesh spilling out over top of the tiny cups. His mouth literally watered.

"Touch me, Sheldon. Touch me anywhere, everywhere. I am yours for the taking. I have it in writing," She said gently, her hands steadying herself on his chest.

"Amy," He moaned, feeling like he was coming unhinged. "I want to do more than touch you. I want… I want…" He stumbled, falling into silence as she moved again, pressing herself against him in the most tantalizing of ways.

"Amy lowered her mouth to his ear, blowing against the skin there. Sheldon shivered.

"What, Sheldon? What do you want?" She asked him, imploring him to be honest with her, to give her his trust. Sheldon closed his eyes, not able to look at her alluring body without restraint.

"I want to…I want to…God…I want to make you mine, in every way possible. I want to bind you to me so that you will forever know to whom you belong."

His eyes flew open at his confession, meeting her stunned ones. Amy gasped.

"Oh, God…I want that too, Sheldon. But we are in no rush. This isn't a marathon. I'm not going anywhere," She whispered, kissing his lips and nibbling at his chin. Sheldon felt his flesh swell further as she rubbed her center against the bulge in his pants. "I'm already yours. You have to know that."

Sheldon's eyes rolled backwards at her declaration.

Yes, he knew it. Had known it for a long time, and yet hearing it from her own mouth was like a revelation. A feeling of such elation swept through his body, his soul…all the while Amy kissed him, caressed him, moving her lips down to his Adam's apple and sucking gently. He lay still and let her 'have her way' with him. Making up for years of denial, years of pent up emotions…she kissed, licked, stroked and caressed his skin from his face to his neck. When she could go no further, she reached for his t shirts and began to lift them. Sheldon tried to focus on her, but his vision was blurry. He realized what she wanted, and found the presence of mind to reach behind him and aide her in her task.

Amy's eyes raked over his smooth, muscular chest with delight. He wasn't ripped, would never be on the cover of muscle magazine…but he was absolutely flawless. Taut, pale, and smooth. His biceps which he always hid beneath long sleeves were hard and defined. Amy blinked like a little girl who had been presented with a gigantic present to unwrap. He was, quite frankly, beautiful.

Sheldon's eyes were lowered to half mast, watching her perusal of him curiously. The way she licked her lips sent his blood thrumming through his veins. She always looked at him like he was everything good in the Universe. It was humbling and heartbreaking.

_She_ was everything good in the Universe.

Amy lowered her mouth, running her tongue over his flat nipples, making Sheldon gasp. She traced a line from his sternum to his navel, thrilling at the fact he had a sexy as hell treasure trail which led to the snug waistband of his khaki's.

"You are a work of art, Dr. Cooper," She said reverently, kissing his ribs and delighting as his stomach muscles contracted. He blushed becomingly.

"Amy, please. Stop torturing me." He begged, helpless against her assault. Taking pity on him, she returned to straddle him, running her palms up and down his chest. He shuddered violently from her loving touch.

"You've tortured me every day for four years. Every look, every touch, every time you are next to me. You've kept me in chains, Dr. Cooper. I think it's only fair I exact my pound of flesh…so to speak," She said with an evil lilt in her voice.

Sheldon could only stare at her, pinned down by her raw truthfulness.

"Is that what you want, to make me pay?" He was able to say, once his voice was returned to him. She watched him, unsure whether or not he was teasing. She never imagined he would assume that she was holding their reserved past against him. It was actually the opposite. The wait she endured, while difficult, had led them to this magical place of trust and overwhelming passion. She wouldn't trade that for anything. Placing her hand on his cheek sweetly, she rubbed his skin, trying to convey her absolute adoration.

"No, you have nothing to pay for. I'd say your debt was paid in full." She admitted, letting him know that everything that led them to this moment was well worth the wait. Sheldon closed his eyes, once again surrendering to the fact he could no longer resist her.

"I've done to you no less than you have already done to me. You call me a vixen, yet it is you who have bewitched me, Sheldon. You have no idea what you do to me."

Sheldon's body trembled at her words.

"Show me," He whimpered, not caring at all how desperate he sounded. "Show me what I do to you. I want to see it. Feel it. Everywhere," He rasped.

Every barrier he had placed in his own way had been dismantled. Every bridge he erected had been burned down. Amy was his master architect, changing his landscape into one of fresh possibilities. He couldn't wait to explore this new and exciting world, with her.

They moved together, creating an unbearable friction. Sheldon reached up, pulling the cups of her bra down and pulling her breasts out for his hands to stroke. Her nipples swelled instantly and he pinched them lightly while she writhed on him, her breath choppy. Leaning up, he latched onto a peak with his mouth, while Amy grabbed his head and kept him tethered to her.

"You taste delicious, like apples," He said, devouring her hot flesh. "If you taste like this everywhere…I want to eat you alive." He moaned, trailing his tongue down her sternum.

Amy cried out at his words, moisture flooding her core.

Sheldon once told Penny that he was a Scientist and had a working knowledge of the Universe and all of its components. Right now, the only unchartered territory he wanted to explore was that of his girlfriend's body.

A thought occurred to Sheldon at that moment. A wonderful, scary, devious thought. He sat up, securing her around the waist and changing their positons, lowering Amy to the bed. She let out a surprised yelp as Sheldon's eyes roamed her body. She was as wanton as he'd ever seen her. The thought crossed his mind when they actually had sex, neither one might survive the inferno.

"What…are you doing?" She whispered apprehensively. The look in his eyes was positively sinful. Never before had Amy feared her boyfriend- until now.

Sheldon stared at her fiercely, his eyes narrowing to slits. "I'm exercising my right as the boyfriend to take what's mine," He repeated her earlier words back to her.

"Oh, my…" She croaked, her body beginning to melt as he peeled her panties down her legs.

"But Sheldon, you…" She bit out, but he cut her off by kissing a path up her leg to her center.

"I know what you are going to say," He rasped between kisses to her heated flesh. "But it doesn't matter. Nothing matters anymore. I'm tired of being a slave to my fears. I want this, Amy. I want to give this to you. Let me have this, please?" He begged, and Amy could do nothing but sink into the mattress in supplication. Her entire body was on fire, heady with the knowledge Sheldon Cooper wanted her.

"Are you…are you sure?" She stuttered, both aroused and worried. Sheldon let out a shaky breath, his eyes taking in her beautiful body which was waiting for him.

"Oh, god…yes. I am," He said with conviction. They gazed at each other a moment, knowing this would be the most intimate thing they'd done so far. That he would want to do this for her…she had no words.

"Okay," She whimpered, trying to prepare herself. Yet when he lowered his mouth to her aching flesh, Amy thought she would pass out from pleasure.

"Ahhh," She cried out, her hands fisting his hair roughly as Sheldon's tongue slid through her petal soft flesh, before using his lips to kiss her and his teeth to nibble gently.

Sheldon reveled in the taste of her. He was right…she tasted like apples everywhere. He moaned and inhaled her heady fragrance before attacking her once more.

He could not believe this was him, partaking in this act that even a year ago, would have sent him screaming in the night. He cared not about germs, or about decorum. Hardly. What he _did_ care about, was the way Amy shuddered beneath his tender assault. The way her wetness increased with each caress. Each lick. Each kiss. The way she moaned his name. Sheldon hummed against her, loving the way she thrashed around on the bed in ecstacy.

_His_ bed.

"Give in to me, Amy. Give me _everything_," He moaned, feeling possessive and crazed. If this was the oblivion that came with surrendering to Ones baser instincts, then he had already crashed and burned.

"Yes, oh god. Sheldon…please" She wailed, her back arching off the bed. Sheldon felt his manhood harden to epic proportions when he saw her breasts swaying in front of his line of sight, her nipples hard. She resembled a goddess. And he…he felt like a god.

"You're mine, Amy. _Mine_. Say it," He beseeched her, wanting to brand her as his. This feeling of animalistic domination frightened him.

Amy thrashed about, her body flushed and her vision clouded. She couldn't breathe as he added his fingers to this onslaught. Good god…where on Earth did he learn how to_ do_ this? How was it even possible that he _was_ doing this? Her Sheldon…her sweet, germophobic Sheldon…was performing oral sex on her like a master.

"Say it," He ordered, plunging his tongue once again through her lips while his fingers teased her relentlessly. She was panting now, rolling around while he tried to keep her still. It was no easy task. When he drew her clitoris into his mouth, he knew he had her. A high pitched, keening cry escaped her and she thrust her womanhood into his mouth sharply.

"Yours," She cried, her body coming apart as she and flooded his mouth and fingers with her arousal. "Oh, god…yours."

A loud groan escaped Sheldon as he absorbed her pleasure, into his heart and soul. How he ever gathered the courage to do this, he'd never know. But he felt fearless and unbreakable in this moment.

"Damn right, you're mine," He roared, his Texas cadence sounding sexy as sin. Giving her no time to recover from her orgasm, he grasped her by the waist and settled her down on his lap again, thrusting up into her as her body twitched and she tried desperately to hang on. His hardness was practically bursting through his pants, but there was no way in heaven or hell he would remove them. To do that would surely end in him taking her virginity right here and now. As much as that thought tantalized him, it wasn't the way it was to be done. For now, this was enough. For now, this was everything. Her wetness drenched his pants and instead of horrifying him, it aroused him beyond imagination. In the animal kingdom, he was the alpha male. He reigned supreme. And right now, his mate had fully surrendered to him.

Baser urges, indeed.

"Faster," He heard her screech, shocked that she was already building up toward the pinnacle again. His control reached his limit. He ground her down against him as hard as he could, thrusting up into her as fast as he could. This primal dance was once that he had never done before, but it was like second nature to him. It reminded him of when he and Amy danced the Tango; he finally realized how much like sex dancing was.

And he excelled at dancing, so…

"Faster, hmmm? Someone is very bossy tonight," He parroted breathlessly, sliding against her deliciously. He peppered her neck and breasts with kisses and bites. Amy's will shattered.

"Oh, Sheldon….oh…" She cried, the combination of his deep, sexy voice teasing her and his hard body thrusting against her sending her over the edge. She came apart in his arms, clinging to his chest.

Sheldon felt her body convulsing and held her tightly, forcing his chest to scrape against her sensitive breasts. She lay down on top of him, her head resting in the cradle of his neck as he continued to grind against her, trying to reach his own zenith.

"One day, I'm going to make you mine, completely. I'm going to take you to places you've only dreamt existed, Amy. I'm going to bring you pleasure beyond your wildest dreams. And then, after I've accomplished that, I'm going to do it all over again. I promise you," He professed, his body trembling as her fingernails bore into his flesh. He cried out as his orgasm hit, fierce as a tsunami, and he dug his hands forcefully into her backside.

They lay together panting, moaning through the aftershocks. Sheldon couldn't imagine feeling any better than this. He shivered as he remembered they weren't even halfway there yet to what they could be experiencing.

"Promises, promises, Dr. Cooper. I will hold you to that. Make no mistake about that," She rasped, leaning up to kiss his neck and chin. Sheldon forced her mouth open with his own, his tongue mingling with hers.

It was a strange but erotic knowledge for Amy, knowing what Sheldon just did to her and not minding his kissing her. She supposed it was a primal instinct; one as old as time.

Sheldon was having a hard time catching his breath. This feeling of utter rapture was going to kill him. He could care less, though. They collapsed in a heap on his sodden sheets, neither one able to move. Sheldon wanted to shout out his love for her. He loved her. Adored her. Revered her. And if she let him, he would love her until his dying breath. Perhaps even after that.

"Stay with me tonight?" He whispered, pulling her close. Amy turned her face to see his beloved profile, his eyes closed in the dim light.

"Really? She asked, surprised. Sheldon nodded, kissing her nose.

"Yes. Really." He answered, content.

They rested for a moment, when a thought hit Amy.

"What about dinner? I left it sitting on the counter," She said, her tone concerned. Sheldon merely smiled.

"Cold Chinese food is awesome," Sheldon said, making Amy giggle.

"Awesome, Sheldon? Since when have you employed that word into your repertoire?" She asked humorously.

Sheldon pulled back to gaze at lovingly.

"Since the first time I realized that I loved you. That was a pretty _awesome _day….after I ruled out the brain aneurysm, of course," He said seriously.

Amy couldn't help herself. She broke out into a fit of giggles that shook the bed. Sheldon closed his eyes again, drinking in the sound.

"I think I need a shower, Dr. Fowler," He said, and Amy nodded. She could use one herself, after their recent bout of amore.

Rising, He looked back to the bed where Amy was prone, Sheldon's sheet covering her semi naked form.

"Would you…join me?" He asked her huskily, lowering his gaze in shyness.

Amy's mouth opened and closed as she stared at him.

_What?_

"In…in the shower? Join you in the shower?" She questioned, needlessly. Sheldon nodded slowly.

"Yes. I'd like to share a shower with you. We could wash each other. It would be twice as fast as showering alone. Is that alright?" He asked timidly. Amy's eyes nearly fell out of their sockets.

Alright? Jesus…after what he gave her tonight, she couldn't believe he wanted to bestow even more gifts upon her. Shyly, she nodded her head, rising with the sheet around her. She stumbled the five paces to meet him at the door, his eyes taking her in as she grew closer and closer.

"You won't be needing this," He said quietly, pulling away the sheet and throwing it back on the bed. Next came her bra, which he unhooked. "Turn around," He whispered, and she complied. He pulled her skirt down her legs, leaving her completely naked before him. Sheldon swallowed thickly as he took her in, all of her, for the first time. Of all the times they'd been intimate, she wore at least some form of clothing. This time, she was standing before him looking like Aphrodite herself.

He was such a lucky man.

"Oh, my…you are absolutely perfect," Sheldon murmured, turning her around and admiring her from every angle. Amy bit her lip, lowering her arms across her breasts. Sheldon's intense scrutiny made her shiver.

"Don't ever be embarrassed to share yourself with me, Amy. I've seen you at your worst. I've seen you at your best. I love you either way." He said tenderly, kissing her forehead softly.

Amy was overcome with emotion. She had no idea what love could feel like. It was an intense mix of pain and joy, and she wasn't sure if she could bear it.

Sheldon led her to the shower, turning it on to warm before allowing her to step in. He washed her hair, loving how the long strands silkily slipped through his fingers. He took a cloth and washed her body, soaping her up and reveling in how goose bumps bloomed on her soft skin. He cared for her, loved her, and made sure she was warm and comfortable. And then, he brought he told her to relax on the couch as he changed his sheets before coming to retrieve her.

Amy was sure Paradise could feel no better.

Much later, Amy woke to the gentle patter of rain. It beat against Sheldon's bedroom window, and she wasn't sure if the sound soothed or annoyed her. She had been sleeping soundly, having the most delicious dream.

Sheldon stirred behind her, tightening his grip on her waist. Who would have thought her boyfriend was a cuddler? There was nothing overtly sexual in the way he held her; it was more comforting than anything else. But the way her body reacted was another story. It amazed Amy how his merest touch could set her aflame.

She lay there in the dark, trying to gather her thoughts. Too much to sort through, she decided. So much had happened.

There was a time when she was certain intimacy between she and Sheldon would never happen. Now she knew it was here, and had come in like a ghost, quiet and deceiving. They had yet to discuss 'that' particular topic; she meant what she said earlier. They were in no rush, they weren't on a timetable. She wanted to share that last piece of herself with him, craved it, really. She was terrified in many ways, but the faith and love she had for him were stronger than her fear of the unknown. What scared her most, though, was Sheldon regretting it. Whatever they did, he had to be the one to initiate it. She had to be completely certain he was ready to take that step. She couldn't handle it if he blamed her for progressing things too fast, too soon.

Amy heard Sheldon sigh, his breath blowing her hair on the back of her neck. She froze for a second, and her thought was confirmed when Sheldon leaned over, meeting her gaze sleepily.

"I knew you were awake," He whispered, his hand caressing her hip. Amy drew her brows together.

"How?" She asked, turning to face him fully. His hair was mussed, his cheeks rosy, and his blue eyes unfocused. He looked absolutely edible. Sheldon's eyes drowsily blinked at her, as he studied her.

"You're breathing pattern. It went from deep and steady to shallow and wispy. You were either awake, or had just finished REM sleep. Either way, you were no longer in a peaceful place. Your alpha waves were in a state of frenzy."

Amy smiled at her boyfriend. A giggle threatened to escape her at how much he sounded like Mr. Spock. She turned her head, lest he see her smirk and be offended by it. She was expecting Sheldon to call her out on her joviality, or chastise her for mocking him. What he did do was totally unexpected. He sat up, leaning against his headboard, and dragged her body up to recline against his.

"Are you troubled? You normally don't awaken in the middle of the night," He said, his voice serious and worried.

Amy shook her head.

"No, I think the rain woke me up. The question is, what are _you_ doing awake? Did the rain wake you as well?"

Sheldon frowned, staring straight ahead at the wall.

"No…I feel foolish telling you this, but…I was so aware of your presence here, in my bed. I couldn't sleep knowing you were so close. It…I don't know," He trailed off, shrugging. Amy's heart squeezed painfully in her chest at his confession.

"It's alright, Sheldon. I know what you mean," She said softly, resting her head upon his chest. He looked down at her, loving the way she fit so perfectly nestled against him.

"You do?" He asked, and felt her silky hair raking his chest as she shook her head yes.

"Of course I do. I'm used to sleeping alone as well. Having you next to me is like every nerve ending is on alert."

Sheldon nodded, holding her and letting his mind wander.

"Amy…I'd like to ask you something, but I don't want you to feel pressured. If you don't want to, I'll understand. It's just a thought, so don't feel-…"

"Sheldon, it's okay. Ask me already."

Sheldon took a deep breath, sitting up to face her.

"Okay…would you consider…coming to comic con with me this year?"

Amy was stunned. Comic con…his once a year getaway with the guys? Where he spent the better part of a week dressing up in costume, attending sci-fi panels, and perusing vendors buying t shirts, collectibles, and comic books?

"You…you want me to come to Comic Con with you? Don't you want that to just be a guy thing with the others?" She asked, furrowing her brows in confusion. Her reaction was expected, but Sheldon still felt his heart fall with his disappointment.

"You don't want to come. I understand," He said, his voice sounding crestfallen. Amy's eyes widened, and she shook her head. Were his feelings hurt?

"No, Sheldon. I didn't say that. I would like to come with you. Honestly. I just can't believe you want me to, that's all."

Sheldon thought about that a moment.

"Well, I have thinking about it for a couple of weeks now. I know it's normally a 'guy' thing, but I think you would enjoy it. I know not all of Sci-Fi is your cup of tea, but there are many things to do and see there."

Amy pondered his words, before looking at him seriously.

"To be honest, I would love to go with you. But I won't."

Sheldon's face fell as he looked down at her.

"Why not?" He asked quietly, and Amy sighed.

"Well…because it's healthy for you and I to have our own separate activities. You and the guys look forward to this every year. It should be something special that_ just_ you four share. Our lives are changing, growing…but some things should remain sacrosanct. I never want you to think that you have to change for me, or give up what makes you happy, Sheldon."

He gazed at her silently, understanding dawning.

"You don't mind that I enjoy doing this? You don't feel like I'm putting you as second best?" He asked her, and Amy smiled warmly.

"Not at all. This is part of who you are, Sheldon. I want you to enjoy your time away with your friends."

Sheldon was overcome with gratitude for his girlfriend. While he was certain he would enjoy Comic Con more with her there, he understood why she decided not to come.

"Okay, Amy. Thank you," He whispered.

Amy nodded, smiling faintly.

"You're welcome, Sheldon."

They lay in the silent darkness, breathing evenly and relaxing.

"So…even if you aren't coming, we should still probably talk about costumes. You could help me decide." He said sleepily.

Amy opened her eyes, puckering her lips simultaneously.

Oh, yes. The fly in the ointment. She smiled serenely, her eyes already closing.

Sheldon would always be Sheldon. She'd have him no other way.

A/N- Thank you for reading. I will update as soon as time allows. More angst is on the horizon for Sheldon and Amy after this. I suggest battening down the hatches for a while. It's going to get pretty rocky. But never fear….all will be well. I PROMISE.


	29. Chapter 29

~Chapter 29~

A/N- Thank you again for the well wishes and support for my family. It means so much to me. I've said it before but I must say it again: You all are wonderful. Now, I know you're a bit worried about what lies ahead. I don't want you to worry. There is a method to my madness, and one that will be resolved quickly. Grit your teeth and hang on. It will be FINE. What is life without growth? I love Sheldon and Amy and would never give them more than they could handle.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…A warning sign, I missed the good part then I realized…I started looking and the bubble burst - I started looking for excuses. Come on in, I've got to tell you what a state I'm in. I've got to tell you in my loudest tones, that I started looking for a warning sign…" Coldplay - A Warning Sign

Comic Con weekend had arrived - and Sheldon, Leonard, Howard and Raj were busy packing and preparing.

As usual during this particular weekend, 4A looked like a trunk show at Victoria's Secret; makeup, clothing, and accessories everywhere. Penny had left Leonard earlier to his own devices, after pilfering some industrial concealer from his makeup kit. It still amazed her how these guys had more professional makeup than she did.

The weekend, as it turned out, wouldn't be a total bust for the ladies. While the boys were to be away at Comic Con, the girls decided to go San Francisco.

Amy had received a call earlier in the week from the Chancellor of Berkeley, anxious to meet with her and discuss her current progress on her research. He was on the Board of Trustees overseeing her grant, and said he had urgent news to discuss with her.

Amy thought it was odd, having to travel three hundred and eighty miles to meet with him in person rather than share a web call, but she figured if it would work in her favor then it was the best course of action.

Bernadette and Penny decided to tag along, to take in some sightseeing and shopping. After Penny's recent sales trip there, she was very impressed with the City by the Bay and knew the others would love it.

Amy had come by to say goodbye to Sheldon. She wouldn't see him for almost three days, and somehow…that seemed like a lifetime. She wandered through the maze of items littering the living room, knocking on his door gently.

"Sheldon? May I come in?" She asked sweetly, momentarily stunned when the door was opened so fast that she pitched forward with it. Sheldon took one look at her before grabbing her hand and pulling her to him in a gentle manner.

"Are you friend or foe?" He asked jokingly. Amy smiled widely, playing along.

"Oh…I'm definitely friend…" She murmured, batting her eyelashes.

Sheldon didn't miss a beat.

"Good. Now you can help me pack. I wouldn't let a foe touch my unmentionables," He said, releasing her and spinning her toward his bed. Amy shook her head, sitting down.

"Oh, Goody! I get to fondle Sheldon Cooper's _unmentionables_," She parroted in a sexy drawl, smiling sweetly when Sheldon shot her a look laced with shock. Amy raised her eyebrows innocently.

"Sassy talk like that will earn you a spanking, little lady," He warned, not fully thinking about the repercussions his words would produce. Amy sat up eagerly, folding her hands on her lap.

"Hmm…you don't say," She said, eyeing him up and down. Sheldon's mouth dropped open. He was finally beginning to comprehend Amy's brand of flirtation. It had taken him years, but now he could undoubtedly read between the lines.

"That's enough of that. I have a mission here, and you're distracting me enough by simply being on my bed." He said seriously, relieved when Amy sat back and crossed her legs, relenting with a sigh.

"Thank you," He said cordially, grateful for Amy's understanding.

As Sheldon meticulously packed each item into his suitcase, Amy sat on his bed watching him with affection.

"Packing for this trip is impossible. We had originally decided to dress up as The Walking Dead cast since we have tickets for that panel; now Raj decided we should go as the Avengers, and both Howard and Leonard agreed. I'm in a cosplay nightmare here," Sheldon groaned, searching his closet for his Captain America shield.

Amy smiled fondly at the man she adored, sad at the prospect of missing him dressed in the spandex costume. Perhaps she could persuade him to model it for her once he returned?

A delicious shiver went through her as she watched him stretching up to route around for his gear; his back muscles bulged appealingly and Amy sighed loudly.

Sheldon turned around, catching her distinctive cadence.

"Are you alright?" He asked her gently, coming to sit beside her on his bed. Amy nodded, but lowered her eyes shyly. Her former bravado and attempt at innuendo was gone.

"Yes…I'm fine. I guess I'm a little worried about this meeting Sunday. I've been working so incredibly hard the last four months, since I recovered from my illness. This could really put my work on the map if I get approved. I know it's probably nothing, but I feel strange about this meeting. I don't know why I have to go all the way to San Francisco. Why couldn't we just skype? I just wish…" She stopped, not wanting to elaborate. But Sheldon watched her facial cues, and had an idea what she was thinking.

"You wish…that I was coming with you?" He asked her tenderly. Amazed at how he well he was beginning to read her, Amy nodded vigorously.

"Yes, Sheldon. I do. But I'm not asking you to, nor am I expecting you to. I want you to enjoy your weekend with the guys. You've been looking forward to this all year. Besides, I will have Penny and Bernadette with me for moral support. I'm sure everything will go well. It's only nerves, I suppose."

Sheldon stared at his girlfriend, amazed at her selflessness. He wasn't so sure if the roles were reversed, that he wouldn't demand she drop _her_ plans and accompany him. What Amy didn't realize, was that if she honestly wanted and needed him to do just that, he would. He would do _anything_ for her now. He'd truly turned into the hippy he'd always feared he'd become.

"Amy…I would not go to Comic Con if you really needed me. If that is your wish, it is my responsibility as your boyfriend to aide you and see to your comfort. Please…tell me if you want me to come with you." He said sincerely.

Amy's eyes watered at just how far Sheldon had come. Leaning over, she kissed his mouth chastely and tenderly.

"I love you all the more for saying that, Sheldon. I do. But I will be fine. You have no idea what it means to me for you to offer, though. Thank you." She whispered.

Sheldon closed his eyes, drinking in his girlfriend's scent. Pulling her on his lap, he cradled her there while he hugged her tightly.

What in the world was to become of him, he wondered fearfully. It was getting harder and harder to say goodbye to his Amy at the end of the night, or to keep up the pretense that he didn't want her to move in with him and share his space.

His bed.

His life.

He had no words to describe the magnitude of love inside of him. But beneath the love, was a fear that had begun to take ahold of him. He started to worry about Amy's health again. He started to worry about how he would cope now, if Amy were to ever leave his life. For years, he'd lived in denial about how much he needed her. How much he loved her. And how much he desired her.

Now, as each day he fell deeper and deeper into this all-consuming love, he found himself helpless and adrift.

Was this how _everyone_ in love felt? They seemed to go about their daily lives, oblivious to the demons that were plaguing Sheldon. Why did it feel like each moment he spent with Amy, might be the last?

Time and space had descended upon him in the most pressing way. Never before was he as cognizant of the very real passing of moments; moments he could never get back. Every second seemed like a gift now. Time was running out. He'd begun to live in fear of not being able to say everything to Amy that he wanted to. _Do_ things with her that he wanted to. Things that a year ago, he would have been terrified to admit to wanting.

Marriage.

Children.

Growing old together…

A nagging sense of…_something_…was weighing on his mind. He knew it. And he was afraid to name it. But it _had_ a name. And it was constantly pushing itself to the forefront of his thoughts. His previously taunting words to her, spoken to her so mockingly as he flew out of her door and slammed it shut last summer, came back almost nightly to haunt him.

Oh…how the tides had turned. It was _him_ now that could barely focus on anything else, save having her with him night and day. It was he that envisioned them living out their golden years together, grandchildren around them, growing old together…

Sheldon had never before believed in _Karma_. He told himself that these fears were only manifestations of his overwrought mind. He had a lot on his plate at the moment. All he needed was a weekend away with the guys, to restore his balance.

But deep down, in the secret places where his insecurities lay, he feared that this lovely bubble he and Amy had created since he returned last fall, was one day going to burst.

That was not going to happen. He wouldn't _let_ it happen, he reassured himself. Gathering his strength, he hugged Amy closer to his chest.

"You're welcome, Amy." He murmured, kissing her head sweetly. After a moment, she pulled back and stared at him.

"Are _you_ alright, Sheldon? You're not upset that I refused to come with you, are you?"

Sheldon smiled at his girlfriend, moving the hair on her forehead that wasn't held away by her hairclip behind her ear. The simple, sweet gesture made Amy break out in goose bumps. She looked at him adoringly and he gazed back, equally so.

"No, not at all. I would have enjoyed you coming with me, but I can see why you declined. You're right; it is the guy's thing to do. Besides…we don't want to upset Raj again. You remember how he got into a strop when you ladies ruined our gaming weekend that time."

Amy smiled, remembering that night well. It was when she confronted Sheldon on his treatment of her, by getting out of taking her to her Great Aunt Flora's birthday. They had come so very far since then.

She focused on Sheldon again, knowing he was remembering that night, as well.

"No…we wouldn't want to upset Raj. We both know how clingy he can be," She said playfully, reaching up and cradling Sheldon's jaw. He leaned into her hand, his grin lighting up his face.

"Take a lot of pictures. I want to see everyone dressed up." She said happily, and Sheldon turned his eyes to hers, smiling widely.

"I will, Amy. Good luck on Sunday. And please…be careful in San Francisco. The streets there are very narrow. Try not to get run over by a cable car."

Amy laughed, staring into Sheldon's blue eyes. His eyes were bluer than any ocean. Bluer than the brightest morning sky. How she loved them. How she loved _him_.

"I promise." She said, stroking his face tenderly. Sheldon closed his eyes.

"Will you call me this weekend?" He asked eagerly, and Amy nodded.

"I will. But not much. I want you to enjoy yourself. I'm sure you'll be in and out of panels all day, anyway. Have fun, alright?"

Sheldon nodded.

"Thank you, Amy. You as well. I will…miss you."

There was something in his voice that unnerved Amy. She swallowed deeply, trying to force down the lump she knew wasn't really there.

For the better part of five years, Amy had longed for Sheldon to look at her like this. Speak to her like this…now that it was happening, she felt like she could fly.

"I will miss you too, Sheldon." She said tenderly, closing her eyes against the love flowing through her. It was time to go.

Amy scooted off of his lap, walking to the door. She had a lot of packing to do herself, and better get home to do it. Their airport shuttle bus would be picking her up early in the morning.

She made it to the door, when Sheldon jumped off the bed. He rushed over to her, closing the door she'd just opened. Amy stood there, her back to him, wondering what he was doing. He leaned into her, his lips lowering to her neck and kissing her there with infinite tenderness. Amy closed her eyes as his touch ignited her senses.

"I love you, Amy." He whispered.

That was all he said. And it was enough.

Amy nodded, not able to look at him. She knew if she did, she wouldn't be leaving anytime soon.

"I love you too, Sheldon." She whispered back.

Then, she was gone.

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San Francisco was beautiful, just as Penny had promised. Amy had always wanted to come here, but the opportunity had never presented itself. It was her first time coming to Berkeley as well, and she was excited to tour the grounds of the prestigious University.

On Saturday, the three of them took in a sightseeing tour of the city, before having dinner down in Chinatown. Penny held up her Mai Tai for a toast, as Amy and Bernadette followed suit.

"I'd like to propose a toast to our Amy. You _so _deserve this grant with all of the hard work you've done. Here's to hoping tomorrow's meeting goes to plan."

The three ladies clinked glasses, drinking the delicious concoction.

"Here, here." Bernadette agreed.

Amy smiled, swallowing the alcoholic delight and smiling at her friends.

"Thanks, you two. I'm really excited, but still a little nervous." She admitted.

Penny, ever the optimist, rolled her eyes.

"Oh, please. What do you have to be nervous about? You have a sky high IQ, you are one of the best in the country in your field, and you're a kickass Scientist. I'll bet your biggest problem tomorrow will be finding a bank that has enough money in it to cash that grant check they'll be handing over to you."

Amy giggled at Penny's words, but still felt off somehow. Perhaps they wanted her to travel here to tell her in person that her research was awful, and they were pulling the cord on funding it. There was no way for her to know until she was there, so she decided that for tonight, at least, she was going to enjoy herself in the presence of her two best friends.

The city was gorgeous at night, even more so than during the day. After dinner, they took a taxi down to Ghiradelli Square to walk around and have dessert. Stopping into the world famous ice cream parlor, the girls ordered a huge sundae to share, and Amy took a picture of it to send to Sheldon.

'_Look at the size of this thing! It's delicious. You're really missing out.' _ She teased, knowing his penchant for sweets would make him jealous.

Moments later, Amy's phone pinged with a picture message. Amy laughed loudly as she opened it. Sheldon was dressed as a zombie holding what appeared to be a basket of…brains. She cringed at the detail, praying they weren't real somehow.

'_Keep your sundae, little lady! Check out these brownie's molded into the shape of brains! They're from the Walking Dead panel! Aren't they gross looking? I thought you would love them. And their delicious.'_

Amy rolled her eyes at her boyfriend's antics, wishing he were there with her.

'_Wow…now I'm jealous. You know how much I love brains. Are you enjoying yourselves?'_

Penny took a huge spoonful of ice cream, leaning over to view their texting. She shot Amy a sexy look and giggled.

'_Very much so. It's crazy here, but we're having so much fun. The guys miss Penny and Bernadette. They're driving me crazy.'_

Amy smiled.

'_And you, Dr. Cooper? Are you missing your significant other?'_

Amy barely hit send before Sheldon answered her.

'_More than I could ever tell her. If you see her, please tell her that I am thinking of her.'_

Tears filled Amy's eyes.

'_She misses you, as well.'_

A few moments passed in silence, and Amy figured they were done. Until Sheldon's face appeared on her lock screen. He was calling through. Rising, she excused herself to the back of the parlor.

"Sheldon?" She asked breathlessly, so happy that he called. Anxiously, she waited to hear his voice.

"I just wanted to say good luck tomorrow. I'll be thinking about you," He admitted shyly.

Amy was touched.

"Thank you, Sheldon. How are you all getting on in San Diego? Are you enjoying the panels?"

Sheldon let out a huge sigh of happiness.

"Oh, yes. It is a zoo here! It's wonderful, though. We're all enjoying ourselves. How is San Francisco? Is it foggy?_"_

Amy looked out over the Bay, wishing he were sitting there with her right now.

"No, it's not foggy. It's actually quite beautiful. We had a nice day exploring. The girls are going to Alcatraz tomorrow while I head over to Berkeley. My meeting is at noon."

Sheldon hummed on the other end of the line.

"Are you feeling better about it now? I hope you know you have nothing to worry about. You will knock them dead with your intelligence."

Amy chuckled.

"Thank you, Sheldon. I really miss you."

The line was quiet a moment.

"I really miss you, as well. I wish you were here with me, Amy. I know, I know…it's a guy thing. But…I do. The hippy commune I looked into has emailed me an application. I should be weaving clothing out of hemp before the year is out."

Amy laughed loudly, trying to imagine such a sight.

"That is very sweet of you to say. I wish you were here, as well. San Francisco is a beautiful city. Very romantic."

Sheldon chuckled.

"You _are_ being careful walking up those hills, aren't you?" He asked sincerely, and Amy rolled her eyes.

"Yes, Sheldon. And I haven't thrown myself into the path of an oncoming cable car. I'm being very careful, I promise."

Mollified, Sheldon nodded on the other end of the line.

"That is good to know. I'm proud of you, Dr. Fowler. You are being a responsible tourist."

Just then, Sheldon sighed loudly.

"I'd better go. The guys are calling me."

Amy smiled warmly.

"Okay…have a great night. Talk to you tomorrow."

"Will do, Dr. Fowler. Goodnight."

Amy disconnected the call, unable to hide the happiness on her face the simple act of speaking to Sheldon caused. Returning to the table, she noticed Penny and Bernadette eyeing her slyly.

_Oh, boy…here we go_, she thought.

Penny, of course, was the first to address the issue.

"So…what gives with you and Dr. Whackadoodle? You have been very _hush hush_ lately, little lady."

Amy shrugged. While she wanted to share her news with the girls, she was afraid to voice it. That would make it real, and then it could be taken away. Picking up her spoon slowly, she dipped it into what remained of the sundae.

"Well…we're in a good place. We have come to an understanding, of sorts." She said vaguely, and Bernadette narrowed her eyes at her friend.

"A good place, huh? I think you're full of beans, is what I think. A blind person could see the way you have been acting, Amy. And your boyfriend is no better; he looks like a lovesick teenager around you lately. Come on…fess up. We're your besties. If you can't confide in us, who _can _you confide in?"

Amy chuckled at Bernadette's tenacity.

"Okay…we've um…experimented. A little. But don't get any pie in the sky ideas. We haven't done…that. Yet." She threw in, shoving the spoon in her mouth to hide her smile.

Penny and Bernadette smirked at each other, before turning to Amy.

"I knew it! I could have sworn I heard Sheldon whistling the other night," Penny said, to which Amy blushed.

"Come on, Penny. We both know Sheldon Cooper doesn't…whistle," She said demurely, but Penny wasn't having it.

"Yes he was, you little Vixen. Just how much _experimenting_ has been going on in 4A these days?" She asked, raising her brows. Amy ducked her head.

"Listen…you know Sheldon would kill me if I discussed him like that. Just know, that we are finally moving towards the…inevitable."

Rather than guffaw or make jokes, Penny smiled sweetly at her shy friend.

"Amy…that's great. Really. I'm so happy for you. It's about time you were treated like the goddess that you are. I never thought Sheldon had it in him," She said in wonder, to which Bernadette smirked. She couldn't help it.

"Well…he doesn't have it in him _yet_," She laughed obnoxiously, and Amy shot her a mortified look.

"Don't you mean, _Amy_ doesn't?" Penny countered, and the three ladies burst into laughter.

"Alright, alright…enough jokes at my expense." She said in warning. Her friends backed down, grabbing their purses.

"Let's blow this pop stand. The night is young," Penny said happily, and the three ladies filtered out into the cool night air.

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Sixteen hours later, Amy waited patiently for The Chancellor's secretary to call her into his office. She had her recent case study notes in her briefcase, and all of her latest data with her. Her knee bobbed nervously as she waited to be ushered in.

'_Calm down, Fowler. This isn't the Spanish Inquisition_,' she chided herself.

Even though she was certain of her abilities as a Scientist, pandering for money for research was where she always fell short. Thank goodness, all Prince Faisal asked of her upon her visit to his homeland was her participation in a few camel races and a visit to the hot springs.

A woman in her late fifties with long, grey hair secured in a neat bun came out to greet her.

"Dr. Fowler? Chancellor Simpson will see you now. Please follow me," She said cordially, and Amy stood on wobbly legs to follow her down the long corridor leading to the Chancellor's office.

The secretary rapped on the door twice before entering, ushering Amy inside.

"Dr. Fowler is here, Dr. Simpson," The woman said, before turning to her boss with a smile.

"Dr. Fowler, it is so wonderful to finally meet you. I have heard much about you from Dr. Richmond at UCLA. She had nothing but high praise for you and your work. To have such a noted Neuroscientist on this project is indeed a coup for us." He said genially, ushering her to sit at the massive desk.

"May I bring you both some refreshments?" The secretary asked kindly, and the tall man smiled at her.

"Dr. Fowler?"

Amy nodded, smiling gently.

"Just some water, please."

Chancellor Simpson nodded once.

"I'll take a black coffee, Elaine. Thank you."

The woman left, closing the twin doors behind her. Amy turned her attention to the man in front of her, trying to remain calm.

"Thank you, Chancellor Simpson. It is truly an honor for me to be on this project. I was worried that after my illness and subsequent concussion, you would think I wasn't up to task."

Chancellor Simpson waved away her fears kindly.

"Not at all, Dr. Fowler. Your reputation precedes you. I'm sorry we pressured you so soon after your recovery. But after reading your reports and those of your Superiors, I can see our thoughts were right on the mark. You have exceeded our expectations and the world of Neuroscience will be forever changed by your findings. I only hope that we've give you ample time and the tools necessary in which to conduct your research."

Amy nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh yes, Sir. Between Caltech, UCLA, and Berkeley, I have been adequately endowed with research technology. I am very grateful."

Chancellor Simpson smiled politely. His secretary returned with their beverages, setting them down before walking out again. Amy took a much needed sip of her water, grateful as the coolness eased her parched throat.

"On that note, Dr. Fowler…I have some wonderful news for you. Due to the success of the project, which will be published in Neuron magazine, I am pleased to tell you the Dr. Fontaine of The Sorbonne in Paris has extended a job offer to you. He is quite anxious to meet you, and for you to join their team. Their lead research Scientist has retired due to health issues, and they need a strong senior Scientist to lead them forward. Your name came up, and after reviewing your work and history, I recommended you. All you have to do is say yes, and the position is yours."

Amy stared at Chancellor Simpson, dumbfounded.

_What?_

"I'm sorry, Sir…did you say The Sorbonne?"

Surely, she must have misheard him. Surely, this was a mistake.

Surely.

"Indeed I did, Dr. Fowler. I was contacted by them on Wednesday, hence my invitation here to meet. I felt it was too important to do over a web call."

The Sorbonne? Paris? _Oh, God…_

"The Sorbonne? The Sorbonne wants…me?" She asked quietly, her voice void of any real passion. Chancellor Simpson looked at her in confusion.

"Why, yes. They do. They are very anxious for you to join them. Surely you must be aware that you are the top Scientist in the field of addiction studies practicing Neuroscience in the United States today. They are awaiting an answer from you within 72 hours."

Amy felt all of the air leave her lungs.

_72 hours?_

"How…how long is this assignment for?" She asked quietly.

Chancellor Simpson pursed his lips.

"The research will take at least six months to calculate. But the position is indefinite."

Amy closed her eyes, losing her breath.

"Indefinite. As in…it could be six months. A year…or…for a very long time."

The Chancellor narrowed his eyes at Amy in concern. She wasn't taking this news as happily as he'd assumed. Such an offer was a magnificent achievement, and something any young Scientist would jump at. She seemed rather terrified of the prospect.

"I…I assumed you called me here today to discuss my grant money. I was worried I had fallen short of the task you assigned me. I had no idea…" She faltered, not able to finish. She felt defective and foolish, literally blindsided.

"Well, Dr. Fowler…you most definitely have our support. Any grant money you need to secure will be procured without fail. But we felt as a whole, your work was worthy of this honor. I'm sorry, you seem a bit taken aback. I hope I haven't upset you in any way."

Amy stared at the man, not sure what to say. She offered him a small smile, which he returned.

"Dr. Fowler…I realize this is a lot to digest in a short period. I understand you have a life here in California. But know this…an opportunity like this does not extend itself often. There is a waiting list ten years long for the Sorbonne. The fact that they have bypassed their normal selection process and have singled you out is a great honor. I am sure you can appreciate how delicate their position is. I implore you to discuss it with your family, and think it over."

Amy nodded woodenly. Everything Dr. Simpson said was true. She herself had applied to the Sorbonne shortly after arriving in California. But so much has changed since then.

_So much_.

"I thank you, Chancellor. And I promise I will think about it. I will give you my answer within 72 hours."

Amy rose, shaking the man's hand firmly. She needed to get out of here. She drove back to the hotel, her mind in a daze.

Halfway back, she pulled over her rental car and sat forward, hands gripping the steering wheel. Her mind was spinning so fast, she knew driving was a dangerous task at the moment.

The Sorbonne…

Working in Europe was indeed something she never thought would come to fruition. She'd dreamt of such an opportunity when she graduated Harvard. To know she was on the cusp of achieving such an honor meant the world to her. And yet…it didn't mean enough. Not anymore. There was something else, _someone_ else…that had taken center stage in her life.

Was she crazy? Certifiable for even considering staying when such an opportunity was literally being handed to her? This could make her career. She could be the youngest Neuroscientist to ever win a Nobel Prize. Wasn't this what she strived for, day and night since she was 16? And what would her mother say? Oh, God…

She sat there on the edge of the road, staring at the Pacific Ocean for God knew how long. Crossing over the Bay Bridge leading back, she allowed the tears to fall.

Amy made her way upstairs, room card in her shaky hand. When she opened the door, it was to see Penny and Bernadette packing their bags. Their flight was leaving at 9 pm back to LAX. They both stopped at looked up, coming to stand by her.

"How was the interview? Are they going to give you lots and lots of cash?" Penny asked, and Bernadette smiled expectantly.

Amy felt like she was going to fall down. She had to move, sit, or lie down. Standing still wasn't an option.

"Um…not exactly. They, um…they were impressed with my work. They applauded it. And they….offered me a job."

The girls looked at each other, confused.

"A job?" Penny asked, her voice wavering.

Bernadette watched Amy closely for any sign of what was going on.

"Oh, Amy. That's…great. A job here at Berkeley?" Bernadette stammered out, while Penny felt apprehension build in her mind.

Amy closed her eyes tightly.

"No. Bernadette. Not Berkeley." She whispered.

Amy went to the window, looking out and admiring the Golden Gate Bridge. She gulped back the lump in her throat, trying not to cry.

"Well…where then?" Penny asked apprehensively.

The room was quiet for endless moments, and Penny knew something was very wrong.

"The Sorbonne. In Paris." Amy whispered, her voice devoid of any joy. This was something that as a Scientist, she should have been celebrating. Jumping up and down about. And four years ago, she would have. But now…

Penny sat down on the bed, while Bernadette shuffled from foot to foot awkwardly.

"Paris, France?" Penny confirmed, already knowing the answer. Amy turned, her eyes full of tears.

"Yes."

Bernadette let out a huge gust of air, stunned.

"Wow. Amy…that is absolutely fantastic. Congratulations. What are…what are you going to do?" She asked gently, and Penny's eyes swung to Amy.

"I…they want my answer within 72 hours." She said brokenly, feeling the air in her lungs beginning to choke her. Bernadette walked over to her quickly, steering her to the chair at the desk.

"Breathe, Amy." She implored, and Amy sat down, trying to take deep breathes.

Moments went by as Bernie rubbed her back, and Penny went to get her a drink of water.

After she began to calm down, Penny knelt down in front of her.

"Amy…what are you going to do? About…Sheldon?"

Her glassy eyes looked swollen and unfocused. Penny bit her lip at Amy's distress.

"I don't know…I didn't…I had no idea that they…I can't…" She stuttered pathetically, unable to process everything.

Sheldon…oh, god. Sheldon. What was he going to say? She couldn't leave him. She couldn't.

"I…I can't do this. I can't. I…I love him. I don't want to go," She cried, feeling the panic begin to swirl in her chest.

Bernadette nodded at her, rubbing her back in soothing circles.

"Amy…you need to think about this from every angle. I know you and Sheldon love each other, but this is a huge step forward in your career. It's what you've worked your entire career towards. You never know…maybe Sheldon will come with you," Penny said hopefully, looking to Bernadette for support.

Bernie tried to smile, but even she knew Penny's words were probably for naught. Sheldon Cooper may have changed in the last few months, but expecting him to uproot his life and move to another country seemed like a far- fetched idea. The two women stared helplessly at Amy, knowing this was something the woman hadn't anticipated.

"I…no. I don't think I want to do this. Not now. It's just…the timing is all wrong. Oh, god…I don't know what to do." She cried, breaking down.

Penny and Bernadette knelt down to console her. It was going to be a long night.

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Sheldon yawned discreetly as Dr. Gablehauser droned on. It was the Physics Department annual Physicist's review, and after the enjoyable weekend he had a Comic Con, the last thing he wanted to do was be subjected to this drivel.

Leonard had just endured a 30 minutes session with their boss, and now it was Sheldon's turn to be tortured.

"Dr. Cooper, I want to congratulate you on the success of your recent paper. The field of Dark Matter has indeed improved since you joined the ranks. But don't get any ideas…you are still under contract to teach two days a week" He said to the younger man, his ever present arrogance still intact.

Sheldon smiled politely at his boss, even though the man was an insufferable bore.

"Thank you, Sir. I am glad that my hard work has pleased you."

'_Because that is my aim in life…pleasing you_,' Sheldon thought sarcastically.

Gablehauser nodded, packing up his notes.

"Well, it has, Dr. Cooper. Thank heavens your troubles from last year are a thing of the past." He said, turning to leave the conference room. Sheldon rolled his eyes at the man's condescending attitude. The man stopped at turned, fixing Sheldon with a sturdy smile.

"Oh, and by the way… I hear congratulations are in order to your girlfriend, Dr. Fowler. I heard through the grapevine this morning of her achievement."

Sheldon offered the man a tight grin. He supposed that being in a position of authority afforded his boss first- hand knowledge of anything University related.

"Thank you. Dr. Fowler worked very hard. I'm sure that Caltech will be very happy to keep her a little longer," Sheldon said, to which Gablehauser narrowed his eyes.

"Why would she want to remain here at Caltech, when she's been offered a position at The Sorbonne? What an honor," He said in awe, shaking his head.

Sheldon did a double take.

"I'm sorry…what?"

Dr. Gablehauser didn't even notice the shock in Sheldon's voice.

"The Sorbonne University in Paris. I said what an honor for Dr. Fowler, to be offered a position there. You must be very proud of her."

He stared at his boss, stunned. The man finally picked up on Sheldon's confusion, widening his eyes in understanding. Perhaps he didn't know yet?

"Well…I must get back to work. Have a good day, Dr. Cooper," He said, tension in his voice.

Sheldon didn't even hear him leave, nor the door click closed at his departure.

Sheldon stumbled out to the quad, sitting down heavily on a bench as though his body were encased in cement. The sun was hiding behind some wispy clouds, signaling a storm was coming. Sheldon could smell it in the air.

Students and faculty alike walked by him, chattering loudly. Sheldon saw none of it. Heard none of it.

_The Sorbonne? _

He pulled out his phone, but there were no missed texts from Amy. No missed calls, either.

What was going on?

He thought back to their texting last night. After both arriving home late from their respective weekend activities, they only wrote a few words in greeting. Sheldon informed her of their Avengers panel success, actually getting autographs from the cast. Amy told him her meeting at Berkeley went _well_, and that she would see him the next evening for dinner at his apartment to discuss it.

They wished each other sweet dreams.

Simple.

Uneventful.

Nothing out of the ordinary.

So why then, did Sheldon suddenly feel like his world was about to suffer a major paradigm shift…One that he would never, ever recover from?

A/N- Thank you for reading.


	30. Chapter 30

~Chapter 30~

A/N- I'm updating early because this weekend will be very busy for me. As always, your love and kindness touches me deeply. Your support is the lifeblood of this story. Here we are once again, awash in a sea of angst. Do not fear. This is a HEA story. This will be the final hurdle for our beloved couple. Sometimes in life, you don't know what you have until you lose it… Or throw it away. Please remember way back in Chapter 2, when Amy was pondering the I Ching teachings on Chaos. This and the next chapter will be a tough read. But after that, no more angst. I promise. They will have earned their reward. And then some. While writing this chapter, I reminded myself of Diane Keaton in Something's Gotta Give - when she was writing her play and weeping at every line. This was difficult for me to write, but the payoff later will be so sweet. I'm telling you, once it's over, you will cry at what's coming. I cried, anyway. Have patience.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Now there's no point in placing the blame. And you should know I'd suffer the same if I lose you, my heart will be broken. Love is a bird, she needs to fly. Let all the hurt inside of you die, you're frozen…when your heart's not open. If I could melt your heart…we'd never be apart…" Madonna - Frozen

Sheldon stood at the window looking out but not seeing anything. The rain beat against the glass gently, and at any other time, the sound would be soothing.

The city of Pasadena was shrouded in wetness, the lights reflecting in the rainwater on the sides of buildings and in the puddles down on the street. The sound of distant thunder rumbled through him. From his fourth floor vantage, he could see for miles.

But he couldn't see Amy.

Ever since this morning when Dr. Gablehauser broke the news to Sheldon about Amy being offered a position at the Sorbonne, Sheldon could think of nothing else but her. She was coming over for dinner with the rest of the group in over an hour, and he hadn't yet heard from her. Why hadn't she called him, and told him about this? The feeling of confusion he was experiencing was nothing compared to the feeling of worthlessness. Didn't he rate enough to at least tell him she was going to leave him?

He tried to be mature about this. He even tried to be rational. Nothing worked. He felt his heart breaking apart at the seams, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

He was proud of Amy and her accomplishments. He truly was. But the selfish part of him was dying inside at the prospect of her leaving him. Was it because he was frightened she would never return? That being in Paris, she would meet someone else? A man who could offer her things Sheldon never could, or give her the kind of future she deserved?

He had been trying to so hard the last year to change. He thought he'd made good progress. Perhaps this was Amy's way of escaping all of the drama once and for all. That idea hurt him more than anything else; that she was simply biding her time until something better came along. He had grown to trust her more than he ever imagined he could. To have her leave him now…

Somewhere in the last twelve hours, he resigned himself to the fact he was going to lose her. That he _had_ lost her, in a way. Appearing pathetic and begging Amy to stay was not in the cards. It simply wasn't him. And she deserved better than that. This was a life altering opportunity for her. Who was he to stand in her way? What if the shoe were on the other foot; would he expect _her_ to understand? Would he still feel the same way about leaving her now, after everything they'd been through this summer? Or would he leave her without even a word, calling her from his final destination with a 'Guess what?'

Sheldon closed his eyes against the onslaught of pain. He knew this was too good to be true. He should have never allowed it to get this far. There was a reason he kept people at arms-length. The more of yourself you gave them, the more you disappeared. He was certain that when she left, he would be whisked away with her, leaving only an empty shell behind.

Walking slowly over to the couch, he fell down onto it without even feeling the momentum. A horrid thought entered his mind, but he couldn't help it. He thought back to when Amy was near death; he knew that if she died, it was final. But this…to know she would be out there in the world, living a life separate from him…

He hated himself, but he didn't know which was worse. How was he going to go on without her?

He had left work shortly after he found out, not bothering to tell Leonard. He found himself on the bus, not even having gone back to his office to retrieve his laptop. The Heavens opened and he was drenched by the time he made it upstairs. He didn't even feel it. He was numb all over.

Leonard came home and knocked on his door, asking him if he was ill. Sheldon barely choked out a no, and Leonard didn't push the issue.

What hurt the most was that Amy was avoiding him. If she had just told him, he may have been able to cope. At least, that's what he told himself. The double barrel of her possibly leaving _and_ hiding it felt like he was sucker punched.

Had she already made her choice? Perhaps it wasn't _even_ a choice; maybe he was the last thing on her radar right now, and she had spent the last twenty four hours calculating a plan how to cut him loose.

Suddenly, Sheldon found himself back in that hospital room, the decision where Amy's future lay taken out of his hands. He had no say in the matter.

He felt helpless.

Impotent.

Afraid.

Tears gathered in the Physicist's eyes, but he fought them. He had to remain strong. Perhaps, he thought with dread, this was payback for his leaving Amy last summer. This must have been how _she_ felt; kept in the dark, alone, and thinking the worst. He hardly thought Amy was doing this to be cruel. But the end result was the same.

She knew, and had known for over a day. And she didn't bother to tell him. Her reasoning didn't matter. And now, much like Amy had then, it would be his time to wait and wonder what was going to happen.

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Amy trudged up the four flights of stairs to 4A with a heavy heart. She was tired, stressed, and sad.

After returning home late last night, she threw her bags on the couch and retreated to her bathroom for a bath. She needed to escape all that had transpired and just pretend that it didn't. What was supposed to be a fun girls weekend with the added bonus of securing a grant for her work, had turned into a nightmare for her.

Why was she being so dramatic? She wondered. This was a golden opportunity. An honor any Scientist in her position would jump at the chance for.

So why then, did it feel like a death sentence?

She knew. Of course she knew.

Sheldon Cooper.

There was no way that Sheldon would drop his life here and come with her to Paris. There was no way that she could just leave him here. Six months…or longer.

Why couldn't this have happened to her five years ago? She knew the answer to that, as well. Five years ago, she didn't have the experience or the data to be deserving of such a gift. Part of that gift was due to Sheldon, and his influence in her life. He'd helped her grow as a Scientist over the years, and gave her the courage to strive for more. The reason her work had improved so much over the last four months, was due to him. He'd saved her life, giving her a second chance- at life, and at love. She didn't want to lose that. Lose _him_.

God…this was a mess.

She could hear voices in the apartment. Amy took a deep breath, leaning back against the door. This was not going to be easy. She felt guilty, for not calling Sheldon sooner. But the more hours that passed between them, the more she was certain she was going to turn down the offer. She didn't want Sheldon to worry, so she decided not to mention it until the 72 hours were up.

Yet on her way here tonight, she reasoned she should tell him. He was her boyfriend, and it was a matter concerning him. Even though she knew that it was moot. There was no way she could leave Sheldon. While a wonderful opportunity, it just wasn't the right time. For her, or for them.

Sitting in Chancellor Simpson's office yesterday, hearing that the esteemed University wanted her, she almost fainted. While Amy was flattered, her focus had changed in the last twelve months dramatically.

For one, she almost died. That certainly opens up your eyes to what's important in life. While Science was and will always be her focus professionally, she realized it was not the whole of her future. It seemed like a wonderful opportunity on paper. But it wasn't her dream to go to Paris and work hard to make other Scientists look good. She didn't want to merge her work with other's findings; if a Nobel was in the cards, she wanted to achieve it on her own. She had just as high a shot to do it as any man.

For another, she didn't want to uproot her life and leave everything and everyone she had grown to love for what, in theory, was just a _job_. Granted, a very prestigious job…but still.

Somewhere along the line, she had fallen in love. Stumbled, walked, tumbled head long into it. And in doing so, it had opened her eyes to a different world. What had happened to her? She wondered. She could no longer claim Science was her first love.

She never thought she would refuse such an offer. On the surface, it looked as though she was making this decision solely for Sheldon.

She didn't. She had made it for _her_.

Leaving now would not make her happy. She wanted to be happy. She wanted to do what _she_ wanted to do. Not for the sake of Science, not for the sake of what everyone thought was best. Amy wanted a life that she could control. And moving to another country, just as she was finding herself, was not it.

After lying in bed the entire night debating, Amy decided that while a stellar opportunity, the timing was wrong. She made up her mind this afternoon to call them in the morning and tell them she refused.

Amy squared her shoulders, determined to go in there and just act like everything was fine.

She entered the apartment, her eyes landing on Sheldon immediately. He was standing at the kitchen island watching the door like a hawk. Perhaps his Vulcan hearing alerted him to her presence outside. She tried to smile, but could barely manage to lift her mouth. Her heart constricted at the absolute misery on his face. His eyes met hers, and Amy felt like she had been kicked in the stomach.

He looked….lost. Hurt. Scared.

Sheldon turned his eyes away, not even acknowledging her. Amy's breath caught in her throat.

He _knew_. Oh, God…he knew.

Oh, no.

There was a chorus of 'hey', and 'we saved you some dumplings', and 'have a seat' from the group. Howard made to get up so she could sit next to Bernadette. Amy nodded at him, motioning him to stay put.

"Thanks everyone…listen, there is something I need to talk to Sheldon about. In private," She added, her eyes never leaving his. Sheldon made no move to leave his station, simply standing still with his hands resting at his side. Amy swallowed and looked at Penny. Did she tell Sheldon about the job offer? She wouldn't do that to her, right?

Her friend met her gaze with sympathy and remorse. Amy gulped.

"Penny, did you…" She rasped, halting her words when Penny looked at her in confusion. It wasn't Penny, then.

The room became silent as everyone stared at Amy.

"Amy, what is it? Are you alright," Leonard asked, and everyone looked at her expectantly.

Everyone except Sheldon - who turned his back and stared in the opposite direction. She didn't want to do this now, in front of everyone. She wanted to be alone with him, to explain in private -to reassure him that her answer was no. That she was simply shocked when she received the news and wasn't thinking clearly. But Sheldon's silence made it clear that whatever she had to say, she could say in front of everyone. She sighed heavily.

"I've been offered a job in Paris at the Sorbonne University. My meeting at Berkeley yesterday turned out to be about that. They want me to merge my research with a group of Scientist's there. They have watched my work for years now. I had no idea I was even in the running. One of their tenured professor's has retired, and they need to fill a vacant position left by promoting his replacement."

There was total silence as everyone stared at each other, stunned.

"Amy that is incredible, what an honor," Leonard finally said, his eyes immediately seeking out Sheldon. His back was still to the group. It was clear to everyone that Amy hadn't discussed this with Sheldon yet. But it was obvious, he knew somehow.

Sheldon stood still, his eyes closed tightly. There it was.

The tension grew, all eyes on Sheldon as they waited for him to say something. He turned in degrees, his eyes boring into Amy's, completely ignoring everyone else in the room. Penny cleared her throat loudly.

"Maybe we should head out, give these two some privacy," Leonard said, as Howard and Raj looked between them like they were engrossed in a tennis match.

Penny and Bernadette nodded, grabbing their purses and coats. Amy watched the small group filter out, her heart in her throat. Penny gave her a sad smile as she left, and Amy was suddenly scared to death.

When the door shut, Amy turned to him. She opened her mouth to speak, but Sheldon beat her to it.

"Dr. Gablehauser told me this morning, Amy. He wanted to congratulate me on your behalf. The question is, why didn't _you_ tell me? You've known for 24 hours about this. Why didn't you tell me when we texted last night? Why didn't you call me?" He asked, his voice detached of any emotion. Amy moved closer to him, but when she noticed his entire body tense, she stopped. It frightened her how he was acting. He hadn't even greeted her yet, and his face was hard as stone.

"I didn't want you to worry, Sheldon. And frankly…it was a shock. I'm sorry. I never expected it. Besides, I wanted to talk to you in private. I'm sorry Gablehauser told you. He had no right to. I never meant for you to find out like this. But now that I'm here, let's discuss this. It concerns you as well, Sheldon." She said seriously.

He stared at her without blinking, which unnerved her further. Her brows furrowed at his mechanic behavior.

"I fail to see how this concerns me, Amy. This is _your _life, _your_ career. I have no place telling you what decisions to make. I simply would have liked to have known. You could have extended me the courtesy of informing me you were moving to Paris." He said, businesslike and aloof.

He could have struck her, and it would have hurt less. Her mouth fell open, but nothing escaped. He finally blinked, skirting his eyes away from hers, and busied himself with making tea.

"How…how can you say that? Of course this concerns you. We are in a relationship. What affects _me _affects _you_. I would never make a decision this big without your input. Unlike you, Sheldon…you applied to go to Mars without even telling me. I didn't apply for this; it was extended to me." She said softly, trying to get him to see reason. Her words struck a nerve as Sheldon winced at the mention of Mars.

"Yes…well. Now it won't matter anyway." He said quietly. Amy blanched at his words.

"Sheldon… I've already decided that I'm not going."

Sheldon lowered the tea kettle to the counter harder than he intended, and the sound echoed in the otherwise quiet space. Amy jumped.

"Now that is just crazy talk. This is an unbelievable opportunity for you. As a Neuroscientist, you will have access to the most up to date equipment to further your research in ways Caltech could never offer you. You will get access to grants, as well. You will be placed in a much better percentile of actually being reward a Noble Prize for Neuroscience. How could you possibly even consider throwing that away?"

Amy's throat was so dry, she could barely swallow.

"Sheldon…there are more important things in life than work. While my work is important to me, I find that…my future is not dependent solely on Science. If I stayed her in Pasadena, I would not consider that throwing my life away."

Sheldon gaped at her like she was an alien. Her words finally striking home, he shook his head vehemently.

"You have one of the most brilliant minds on this planet, Amy. You cannot and will not throw that away to stay here for _me_."

The air was knocked out of Amy, and she faltered on her feet.

"I'm not staying for you, Sheldon. I'm staying for _us_."

There. She said it. In her mind, it was done deal.

It didn't even dawn on him that she said 'staying'. All day and night, her mind was racing on what to do. But it was her heart that made the decision for her.

He continued, with provocation and without thought as to how his words were affecting her, completely ignoring her last statement.

"If The Sorbonne called _me_ and said I had to be in Paris tomorrow, I wouldn't even have to think twice. This is my life's work, and I thought your life's work. I assumed you wanted to excel professionally. I would never stand in your way. That would be selfish of me."

His words were mechanical and hollow. Even as they passed his lips, he wanted to lasso them and pull them back inside. Lies, lies, lies…yes, he was a man of Science. And certainly, winning a Nobel was his heart's desire.

Until he realized he was in love with Amy. All of his previous aspirations had altered. A year ago, winning that coveted prize had been his only goal. Now, his only goal was to live the rest of his life in Amy's presence, building a life _with_ her. Not apart from her. And if a Nobel came along, more's the better.

But it seemed he was forced to sit by why her dreams took flight. He could not and would not stand in her way. How could he go with her, even if she wanted him to; what would he do in Paris? His life was here. He discovered that as the old biblical parable went, he had been weighed and measured, and had been found wanting.

_You cried out to God, the Universe, or whomever would listen while Amy lay dying that if she was spared, you would gladly let her go. The world of Science needed her. More than it needed you. Those were your words, Cooper. Now deal with it. _

A cruel, bitter irony. At that moment, Sheldon knew that if God did indeed exist, that he was shaking his fist and laughing at him.

The Sorbonne wanted Amy. There was no way she could refuse such an honor. His eyes turned steely blue, setting his heart up to crystalize in his chest, much like Han Solo when he turned to carbon. This was what he had to do, to preserve his emotions, and to relinquish hers.

What the hell was he _doing_?

She looked at him then, really looked at him, and realized that he would never change. He might offer snippets of himself, but never the whole. He would always, always…keep a part of him separate and sacred, because his brain would not allow him to accept the happiness and messiness that was life. He looked at her now like he did in that coffee shop years ago-a stranger who he was to be weary of…of her intentions. At least then, she didn't know him. At least then, she hadn't _loved_ him. Now, she was forever tied to this man and she knew her heart was going to shrivel and die without him.

Moving a stop closer to him, she felt her heart crack when he took a step back.

"Are you telling me you _want_ me to go?" She choked out, petrified of the answer. Her heart already knew what it would be, though. She closed her eyes, waiting for the death knell. She didn't have to wait long.

"I want you to go." He confirmed, his voice like lead.

Amy thought her heart was going to explode.

"You want me-…" She attempted, leaving the sentence unfinished.

God, _yes_. He wanted her. That was a certainty. He ran through the words in his mind. I want you. I want you. I want you. I want you….your hand in marriage. Your children. Your love forever. I want you…I want you so much, Amy….

"To go…yes- I think it best."

Amy gasped as the worst pain she ever felt tumbled through her body. He was dismissing her, like a teacher would dismiss a student who had been caught cheating on a test and had just been reprimanded.

"How could you- why would you feel that is what is best, Sheldon?" She whimpered, not caring if her pride was gone. What the hell was he doing? He didn't mean this. He couldn't…

Sheldon stared right through her, ignoring her distress. The final nail to the coffin - pound it in quickly, Cooper. Then put the hammer down and walk away.

"You and I both knew this was temporary, Amy." He said so softly, so regretfully. It was his voice that tipped her off that he was lying.

She tried to swallow, but the rock in her throat wouldn't allow her. She tried to open her eyes, but they were glued shut. She tried to turn on her heel, but her limbs were cement.

"What was temporary?" She asked, eerily quiet.

Sheldon turned around, unable to face her. If he did so, he would fall at her feet and beg her to forgive him for what he was saying.

"Us."

One word. It only took one word, and Amy fell to pieces.

"W-what?" She managed, her lungs squeezing all the air out of her body in one gust.

"It's time we returned to some normalcy, Dr. Fowler. Science needs us. We could have never been truly happy with this arrangement. And I'm tired of trying to be something I am not. You've pushed me beyond my limits, and now I think it's time I focused on my work again. It's been a learning experience. But I think our dalliance has run its course."

_Dalliance?_

Refusing to listen to him, Amy covered her ears to block out what he was saying. But there was nothing in the four corners of the world that could erase his words, his tone…from her memory.

"How can you say this to me? After all we've…shared. The last four years. The last five months…"

Sheldon spun around, cutting off her emotional plea. He just could not deal with that. He loved her too much to see her like this. He had to get her out of here, before he broke down.

"While I admit our time together was enjoyable, I would prefer to erase the last five months from memory. We should reboot. Pretend it never happened." He stammered out, his voice shaky.

The tears fell down Amy's cheeks now, unrestrained. The emptiness of Sheldon's voice scared Amy, and hurt her more than she ever imagined.

_Reboot?_ Was he insane? He was obviously upset and not thinking straight. She tried to reason with him gently.

"Sheldon," She tried to be calm, clasping her hands together in supplication. "Sheldon I'm sorry. I know you are upset that I didn't tell you right away, but it isn't that important. I didn't want you to worry. I am not going. I'm-…"

"Amy, I think you should go now." He said sadly. "Please."

_What?_

He turned to face her, his eyes completely vacant.

"I'm not going to stand in your way. You have a life waiting for you. You've earned it." He said, his voice tender.

He was serious. He was telling her to leave. She knew he didn't mean it. She knew it. He loved her. He _loved_ her.

"No…this is not happening." She chanted, her tears falling faster. Sheldon watched her, torn between what he wanted and what he knew was right. He didn't have the strength to ask her to leave again. So he would be the one to do it.

Grabbing his keys by the door, he turned to look at her one last time. He hated himself. He would never forgive himself. But she deserved to shine. And it wouldn't be fair to keep her here, stifling her. She thought she owed him something for saving her life. It was time to relinquish her from that debt.

"Please show yourself out, Amy. Be happy. Goodbye."

Amy gasped. This wasn't it. This _couldn't _be it. What the hell was happening here? He wasn't even allowing her to say her side. He was just…giving up on her. On _them_.

"Why…why are you doing this?" She sobbed, trying so hard to keep it together but failing. He wasn't even giving them a chance to discuss this. She didn't want to go. She closed her eyes, fearing she would fall down. Years later, when she opened them, he was gone.

The apartment door was open. He'd left. Amy hobbled over to the couch, falling in a heap on his beloved spot. She looked around his apartment, his possessions, feeling his aura. A feeling of absolute desolation snuck in like vapor, enveloping her. He didn't want her. He wants her to go. With nothing else to do, Amy wrapped her arms around her midsection, and cried.

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Sheldon felt like his world was about to implode. When he fled the apartment, his home…leaving her there…he had no idea where to go. He couldn't think clearly, and his legs carried him up to the roof. He sat down, cross legged on the floor, and rocked himself like he did when he was ten and his parents argued. Back then, the only place to run to escape the pain and fear he felt when his parents would trade barbs and insults was his Meemaw's house. Sheldon bided his time, waiting for the day when he could leave and begin his true journey, one of absolute hard Science. It was his first love, Mother Science, always true and always there for him.

Until one day, it wasn't enough. He discovered that he needed more. The Universe in its infinite wisdom brought him a priceless gift. And now, he'd carelessly thrown it away.

How could he have said what he said? He knew why, deep down. He was terrified. Terrified of her leaving, and terrified of her staying. Either way, someone was going to lose. He figured, it should be him.

He was so proud of her, his Amy. He teased her for years about his superiority over her, but the fact was she was leaps and bounds ahead of him in many ways. He might understand the mysteries of the Universe, but she understood the mysterious of the brain, the heart, the soul. He had been her pupil, and what he'd learned from her was immeasurable. This could very well win her that Nobel. How could he ask her to forfeit her desires, to placate his?

He couldn't ask that of her, he reasoned. Not now. She had been given a second chance. The stark truth was…it wasn't to be with him.

He had never felt so alone in his life. Even as a child in east Texas, even as a teenager away from home, even as an adult, never able to make friends.

He wondered how he would ever recover from this blow.

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"Where is he, Leonard? He didn't come home, nobody's heard from him. I'm getting worried." Penny said, running her hands along her thighs in panic.

Leonard sat beside her on the couch, putting his arm around her shoulder.

"I don't know. He's not answering my calls or texts. I guess he just needs some time. How is Amy?"

Penny shook her head. "She's a mess. She doesn't know what to do. He told her point blank he wants her to go. She accepted the position because she doesn't want to remain here with him so close. What choice does that give her?"

Leonard shook his head in distaste.

"What is he _doing_? He's throwing the best thing that ever happened to him away, that's what. I'll talk to him when he comes back."

Penny didn't know if that would be enough.

"Leonard…Amy is so upset. He really screwed things up. He basically told her he doesn't want her. And that their relationship was temporary, or something to that degree. She feels like she has wasted four years of her life."

Leonard turned around as he heard a key in the lock. Both he and Penny turned to see Sheldon enter, looking awful. It brought back memories of him at the hospital when Amy was sick. Penny shuddered at the memory.

"Sheldon, where the hell have you been?" She yelled, approaching him with her arms crossed. She was pissed.

"That's not your concern." He said woodenly, trying to move past her to go to his room. Penny blocked his path, and he stared at her in disbelief.

"The hell it isn't," Penny warned, not allowing him an inch.

"Please remove yourself from my path," He uttered, a dangerous tone to his voice Penny had never heard from him. For a second, she thought about moving.

For a second…

"No way, Cooper. What the hell did you do? Are you _trying _to tear out your own heart? Do you have a death wish? And how in the world could you do this to Amy? You have left her devastated. After everything she's been through, how could you hurt her like this? I cannot understand you, Sheldon." She screamed angrily, Sheldon flinching with each syllable. Knowing he hurt Amy made him want to cut out his own tongue. Penny continued her tirade, her screeching voice going through his head like a machete.

"You…selfish bastard. Do you _ever_ think of anyone but yourself?"

Finally, he'd had enough. This was _his_ apartment.

"Get. Out. Of. My. Way," He yelled, skirting around her and almost reaching the hallway before Penny ran after him and grabbed his shirt. Stunned, he turned to face her with rage in his eyes. Penny didn't even flinch. After everything she had been through with him over Amy, for him to just walk away like this…

Wasn't going to happen.

"Tell her you didn't mean it. Tell her right now. I will take you. Let's go." She said forcefully, not even letting Sheldon have a word. She began to drag him by the shirt, yanking him with a strength she didn't know she possessed. They got as far as the coffee table before Sheldon shook her off forcefully.

"Take your hands off of me, Penny. I'm not going anywhere."

Penny's eyes shot hell fire at him. She was blazing angry, ready to kill him for his horrible behavior.

"Yes, you are. Or so help me God, Sheldon…I will kick your ass across this apartment. You are going to tell that woman you are sorry, and you are going to beg for her forgiveness. Or I will make your life a living hell. Let's go."

Once again she yanked on his shirt, and this time, Leonard jumped in between them.

"Penny…come on. You can't make him do anything he doesn't want to."

Penny glared at Leonard, her steely eyes drifting to Sheldon beyond him. She snapped. She took her pointer finger and poked him in his chest, hard.

"You are a coward, Sheldon. I always held out, believing there was a man in there somewhere. I fought for you, I _defended_ you. And you've completely screwed up everything. How could you do this? I had _faith_ in you!"

Her harsh words seemed to awaken his ire more. He pushed Leonard out of the way, stepping up to Penny angrily.

"I can't go after her. It's done. Finished."

"Yes, you can," Penny insisted, throwing her hands up in anger.

Sheldon seethed at her.

"No, I can't and the reason I can't is because if the roles were reversed, she wouldn't ask it of me. I don't even know what my answer would be," He lied, knowing that even now, he would choose Amy._ Especially_ now.

Penny eyed him in disbelief. In the eight years they'd been friends, she'd excused a lot of his behavior because she knew he couldn't control much of it. This, however, was the straw that broke the camel's back.

"So if it were the choice between Amy and a Nobel Prize, you would choose some statue over the woman you love? That makes sense to you, Sheldon?" She screamed, her words cutting and dark.

Sheldon's eyes shot to hers in fury.

"This is none of your business, Penny." He roared, the sound bouncing off the walls.

Not to be challenged, she poked him in the shoulder.

"It _is_ my business, Sheldon. Amy is my friend, and I love her. She deserves better. She deserves more than a cursory after thought. If you can't give her that, then by all means…let her go. But if you love her as much as I know you do, then make her stay. Give her a reason to, before it's too late."

Sheldon towered over her menacingly, using his height to his advantage. Penny actually stepped back. Leonard jumped back in between them, fearing the worst.

"You have _no_ idea what my feelings are toward Amy, Penny… and it doesn't bother you in the slightest what I will lose if she leaves. All you care about is losing your drinking buddy." He shouted, his eyes wild as Penny gaped at him.

"That is so not true, Sheldon. You know I of all people was always pulling for you and Amy. I encouraged her to not give up on you, even when you constantly pushed her away. How dare you say I don't care about her? About you both!"

Sheldon glared at Penny, his gaze threatening to disintegrate her.

"I don't believe you. All of this time, you have meddled in our relationship, changed her into someone I don't even recognize, and gossiped to your heart's content about me and my life. The Amy I first met would have jumped on the next plane and ran to that offer with open arms. You've changed her into some… hedonistic whack job who cares more about _feelings _than reality. This is what's best for her. I'm trying to do the right thing here."

Penny took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. It was difficult not to simply strike him across the face to knock some sense into him.

"Sheldon, I know you think you are. That is why it's so important to make her stay. Show her she has options, and you are one of them! Don't you have the courage to even fight for her?"

Sheldon's jaw flexed. He was livid. He knew he was being a coward. Penny rubbing his nose in it didn't help.

"Oh, yes. I have _so _much to offer her. I have given up on String Theory and my future is now uncertain and unmapped. That is unacceptable for her to have to deal with. It took me four years to gain enough courage to _kiss_ her. She can do much better than me. And she will."

Penny took a step back, blinking rapidly. Suddenly, everything became so clear.

Sheldon was afraid. He was giving up the one good thing that had ever come into his life. Not because he didn't want her, and not because he didn't need her. Because he loved her enough to want what was best for her. What he _thought_ she wanted. For once, Sheldon was acting purely unselfishly.

Sheldon Cooper was in love.

"You _love_ her. And you're…_jealous_. She is being recognized for her brilliance, and you aren't. You don't think you're good enough for her," She accused. Tormented blue eyes met hers, the devastation in them making Penny shudder. It was true.

"Sheldon-…"

"Don't," He pleaded, cutting her off. Penny gasped and covered her mouth in sorrow. Beside her, Leonard shuffled from foot to foot in shock.

"I cannot allow her to give up this opportunity, only to have her resent me later. I will _not_ be the sole reason she stays. The choice must be hers. I..." He faltered, losing steam and sitting down in his spot heavily.

Penny looked at Leonard, begging him silently for help. Neither one knew what to do or say to make this better.

Sheldon's eyes closed, unable to look at either of them.

"I can't be her backup plan. If she wanted to stay with me, she would have refused the job outright. She would have at least _told_ me. But no…she lingered. She considered it. Perhaps she truly wants to go. I just gave her an out." He said brokenly.

Penny sat down in the chair next to him, risking contempt by placing her hand gently on his knee.

"Sheldon…you are not her backup plan. You are her _only_ plan. You didn't let her explain. She didn't want to leave. And you didn't tell her how you feel. You practically shoved her out the door. You cut her out of your life. How do you think that made Amy feel? I still don't understand why you are doing this."

How the hell could he make Penny understand? How could he, Sheldon Cooper, PhD, put into words how the thought of living without Amy made him feel? Equally worse, how the thought she may someday resent him for not allowing her to further her career made his blood run cold? Sheldon always assumed he was above such petty human emotions. How wrong he was.

He didn't want her to go. But it was selfish of him to ask her to stay. How was he to measure up to what lay ahead for her? He couldn't.

Sheldon began to sob, putting his head in his hands. All the repressed emotion, all of the exhausting push and pull of the last five months, hell…the last four years, bubbled up out of him, forcing its way to the surface like a geyser. His whole body shook as he cried, not caring that Leonard and Penny were there to witness his fall from grace. What did it matter now, anyway? Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

Penny stared at Sheldon, speechless, tears dripping down her face. She had known deep down that her friend had a heart, hidden below layers of granite. She had been through a lot with him over the years, but she never saw this side of him, had doubted it even existed, until Amy got sick. Her heart broke for him, and what he had just lost, just when he found it. And by none other than his own doing.

"Penny…please leave us a minute?" Leonard asked quietly. She nodded helplessly, leaving the apartment and shutting the door quietly behind her.

Leonard came and sat on the coffee table directly in front of Sheldon.

"Hey buddy? Look at me. Come on," He said, touching Sheldon's shoulder. Moments passed where Sheldon literally could not move. Finally, his sobs quieted, and his breathing returned to normal.

His eyes met Leonard's, and Leonard never saw his friend look so lost.

Leonard knew the time for coddling was over. His friend was a man, not a child. He had given Sheldon all the babying he could. Ten years of friendship, and now, it was time for him to fight for what he wanted. It was time to lay it on the line for him.

"Amy loves you, Sheldon. Are you seriously going to let her walk away like this? Don't do this to her. If she wants to go, you should support her. And if she _doesn't_ want to go, you should support her. Either way, step up and be the man that I know you can be. Even though you drive me crazy most of the time, I love you. You're like a brother to me, and I only want what's best for you. It's time you did the right thing. For yourself, and for Amy. It's time, Sheldon. Far past time. Stop hiding behind your routines, your relationship agreements, and your fears. It's been inside of you, all along. It's time to set yourself free."

Sheldon shuddered, gulping air.

"It's over, Leonard." He whispered, not having the strength to do this.

Leonard threw his hands up in exasperation.

"Sheldon…you wouldn't even talk to her! You left her sitting here by herself, and ignored her calls and texts."

This incensed Sheldon, and he glared at his friend hotly.

"She ignored me! Why didn't she tell me right away? Why did she avoid me?" He countered angrily.

Leonard shook his head.

"She was probably in shock. Penny said she cried all night about it."

Sheldon's face became a mask of stone.

"So…Penny knew, and I didn't. Makes sense," He spat sarcastically. Now it was Leonard who felt like slapping him.

"Sheldon! Penny was there with her, of course she knew. And how could you be so hypocritical? If the tables were turned, would you have been upset with Amy for being annoyed that you didn't tell her? I'm sure she had her reasons for not calling you. Maybe she wanted to tell you in person. The point is, this is too important to just throw away."

Sheldon wiped his eyes.

"Maybe it's not that important to her," Sheldon said petulantly. Leonard had had enough.

"It _IS_ important. There is nothing more important than love, Sheldon. Nothing. We're men of Science. We know that there are mysteries out there that cannot be explained, no matter how many centuries are devoted to uncovering their truths. But I will tell you this with the only certainty I know: love is forever. The mountains will crumble, the truths will disappear, the words will blur. But love will stand immovable. I have never seen a purer love than the one you and Amy share. That is the _only _truth I can attest to, Sheldon. No theory is more important. No proof is more tangible. She awakened your heart, your mind, and your soul. You can try to deny that fact all you want. But you can't hide from it. You weren't really living until the day you walked into that coffee shop and met her."

Sheldon listened to Leonard's words, spellbound.

He always thought his friends mocked his relationship; Amy herself once thought the group considered their courtship a joke. To hear now, that the most revered friend he respected felt this way, gave Sheldon a feeling of warmth and pride. Leonard spoke nothing less than the truth. He _wasn't_ really living until he met Amy. He had been existing at best; living day to day in vain hopes of winning a Nobel, passing time playing video games and collecting comic books. But meeting her opened a doorway for him, to a realm he never dreamed existed. A place where he could lay his fears, his wants, his dreams…all at the foot of her altar. He was terrified of the implications loving her would cost him. It had already begun; his heart was shattered, and he wasn't equipped emotionally to repair himself. And there lay the crux of the matter. He was an emotional infant. It amazed him that a genius such as he could be such a newborn in the ways of love.

"What if I'm not enough for her?" He questioned, fear pouring out of him. Leonard threw up his hands in good natured frustration.

"That is not going to happen, Sheldon. Amy is so besotted with you that it's nuts. She will forgive you. I know it. But you have to stop being the child in this relationship. It is not Amy's job to mother you. You have everything you could ever ask for in the palm of your hand. Take it, Buddy. Better a moment of fear, than a lifetime of regret."

They stared at each other for endless moments, Leonard not sure he got through to his friend, but at least he tried. Sheldon got up and went to his room without another word and closed the door.

Leonard let out the breath he was holding and shook his head.

He never thought he'd live to see the day when Sheldon Cooper felt less than anyone or anything. Good God…the man was _truly_ in love. And he just threw that love away, whether acting out of nobility or not.

What a mess.

A/N- Thank you for reading. I don't know right now who you might be more upset with – Sheldon or me. Deep breaths….


	31. Chapter 31

~Chapter 31~

A/N- Thank you all so much for the major input and love for this story. This chapter is, to me, very personal. To those who feared Sheldon's behavior was OOC last chapter, I agree. It totally was. And that was my intent. Relationship Agreements and personal growth aside, Sheldon was faced with a possibility he hadn't ever anticipated- Amy excelling in her career before him and leaving him, after he finally gave in to really loving her. Rational thought flew out the window. He's human. Coupled with his pride for her, and how he felt like he had to sacrifice his love for her to not be an anchor weighing her down, it was a recipe for disaster. Who amongst us hasn't lashed out and said hurtful things to the ones we love when we're scared or in pain? And his intent wasn't out of selfishness but nobility. This is Sheldon Cooper we're talking about; not your average person. I hope after this, you will breathe a much needed sigh of relief. Just know this: No Relationship Agreement was harmed nor terminated in the making of this Chapter :)

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…All that I keep thinking throughout this whole flight - is it could take my whole damn life to make this right. This splintered mast I'm holding on won't save me long - because I know fine well that what I did was wrong. The last girl and the last reason to make this last for as long as I could – First kiss and the first time that I felt connected to anything - The weight of water, the way you taught me to look past everything I had ever learned- The final word in the final sentence you ever uttered to me was love…And I don't know where to look. My words just break and melt. Please just save me from this darkness. Please just save me from this darkness…" Snow Patrol – Make This Go on Forever

Howard and Amy sat in the departure lounge side by side, in silent companionship. Bernadette and Penny had wanted to accompany her to see her off, but she flat out refused. She was already distraught at the idea of leaving her friends, and the last thing she wanted to succumb to was a teary goodbye. Bernadette urged Amy to at least let Howard take her, and Amy finally relented. Honestly, she couldn't bear the thought of leaving all alone.

Howard kept sneaking sidelong glances at Amy; she looked absolutely desolate. It pained him to see his formerly chipper friend so downtrodden. If only he knew what to say to bring her some comfort. Howard knew Sheldon was fairing no better. Apparently he had taken a leave of absence from work, and Leonard said he was holed up in his room barely eating and not speaking to anyone.

Amy didn't know what to say; it was kind of Howard to bring her to the airport, but she didn't want to keep him and ruin his day.

Three days had passed since the night Amy told the group about her job offer. Amy had decided that perhaps this was the best course of action for everyone; if she had stayed, and Sheldon still decided they were over, it would be too painful to remain in the close company of the rest of the group. Maybe her leaving would free everyone from their social obligation to her, and they could focus on Sheldon.

The fact that this was really happening was too much to take in. She closed her eyes, trying to breathe deeply.

_Just get on the plane, Amy. Then, you can fall to pieces._

She sighed shakily, breaking down and meeting her friend's gaze. He gave her a sad smile, laced with remorse.

Finally, Howard couldn't take it anymore. He _had_ to say something.

"Listen, Amy…Sheldon's not like us. He is not wired the same way. But he cares for you, I know he does. This is killing him. He has been a mess the last three days."

Amy looked at Howard's compassionate face. He was only trying to help, and she loved him for it. But Sheldon had created this _mess_ by his own hand. He was being ridiculously immature and misogynistic. Deciding what was best for her…_forcing_ her to take this job…what the hell was _wrong_ with him?

"Killing him? Howard…he just ran out the door and left me there. He didn't try to stop me. He didn't answer my calls. He's cut me out of his life like I never existed, and for what? Because he feels I shouldn't give up this 'opportunity'? Maybe this was just his way out. A girl can take a hint, you know? Do you know how that makes me feel? Like I've wasted four years of my life with someone who doesn't care one bit if I'm in his life or not. I've been patient. I have. But it's just too much. Especially after the last few months…we've grown so close…but now."

The tears she kept at bay for two days began to fall in a torrent. Amy sat down, embarrassed at her outburst. Passengers were starting to stare at them, so Howard put his arm around her consolingly. He would never understand Sheldon. But obviously everyone has their reasons for what they do in life. He only hoped Sheldon's were worth this.

"Amy, please don't cry. Everything will work out. I know it. Sheldon loves you," Howard said soothingly. Amy could only stare at him sadly. She doubted it would ever be alright again. She'd found the one. Sheldon was it. She could search her lifetime and never again find a mate so suited for her than he. And it had nothing to do with the dating test matching them up all those years ago. It was because he was her other half. Intellectually, and spiritually. She'd grown to love him and now the thought of not being in his life left a gaping hole.

Ever since she almost died from that seizure and pneumonia, her love for him had morphed into something deeper. It wasn't just the fact he saved her life, or was her hero… it was because since that time,_ he_ had changed. She knew it. Why he was doing this was a mystery. He loved her, she was certain he did. She had to believe that. Otherwise, the alternative was too grim. She only hoped that she could work night and day to escape from the long life of loneliness that surely lay ahead for her.

"Perhaps he loves me…but not enough to keep me here," She said, her voice frail. Howard frowned, shaking his head.

"Amy…I know this may not be my place to say, but…I think he's doing this _because_ he loves you. Enough to let you go. I don't think he wants to stand in your way."

Amy hadn't considered that.

"Howard…perhaps he does feel that way. But we are a couple. He wouldn't even _talk_ to me about it. He just assumed I was going, and that was that. I am a grown woman. I can make my own decisions. I chose to stay. But Sheldon didn't listen."

Howard thought back to the night he picked Sheldon up at the bus stop after his fight with Penny, and their conversation in the car. He realized something that a few years ago, he never would have believed. Reaching over, he took Amy's hand in his own, patting it gently.

"He's afraid, Amy. He's always assumed he didn't need anyone. Meeting you has shown him how wrong he was. Do you want my gut opinion, as a man?"

Amy bit her lip, nodding.

"I think Sheldon feels like he doesn't measure up, and that one day, you're going to realize that."

Amy's mouth opened in shock. Not measure up? _Sheldon_? The man was a veritable genius. He was handsome. And he had so many talents and gifts to offer. How could he of all people feel that way?

Then a realization hit her like a wrecking ball: their conversation in Leonard's car on the way home from Arizona. Sheldon admitting that he failed and he didn't want Amy to think less of him.

Was _that_ it? Did he think that he would never achieve the goals he set for himself, and that she would think less of him? Grow _tired_ of him?

She met Howard's sorrowful gaze, and let out the deep breath she held. _Oh, Sheldon…_

Suddenly, her previous pain ran the gamut; first she felt pity for him, then intense annoyance at how badly he'd handled the whole situation. Still, her compassion won out.

"Howard, promise me something?" She asked.

Howard nodded enthusiastically, tightening an arm around her back in a brotherly way.

"Anything, Ames," He assured her.

"Watch out for Sheldon, if Leonard can't. I know you two have had your differences, but you should know something. When you launched into space, and the weeks that followed, Sheldon was worried for you. He was in awe of your accomplishment, even though he said otherwise later. You are a good friend to him, and to me. I know you both have buried the hatchet, but please, just…take it easy on him. For me."

Howard was speechless; he always assumed Sheldon's ambivalence was the most emotion he'd get from him, sharing the same friends. It touched him that in his own way, he actually cared for Howard. After their truce, and trip to Houston, he knew it. He shook his head without hesitation.

"I will, Ames. I promise. I'll miss you, you know. Who will I listen to Neil Diamond with?"

Amy sniffled, laughing as best as she could.

"Perhaps you can persuade Bernadette to give Neil a chance?"

He guffawed.

"I doubt it," he laughed, trying to cheer her up. "Maybe we can catch a concert at the Hollywood bowl when you come back."

Amy looked ahead, not meeting Howard's eyes. He tilted his head, studying her.

"You _are _coming back, aren't you Amy? He asked, for the first time understanding just why she asked him to look after Sheldon.

Amy looked at her watch. It was time to go through security. She rose, gathering her carry on and laptop. Howard walked with her to the security line, waiting patiently for her answer.

"I don't know, Howard. I have no concrete plans now. We'll see what happens in a few months, okay? Give everyone my love. And Howard? Penny was wrong about what she said all those years ago."

Howard furrowed his brows. "Wrong about what?"

"When I told you on the scavenger hunt, that Penny warned me not to be alone with you because you were a creep? Well, she was wrong. You are a gentleman. And I'm glad you're my friend. Thank you for everything. I know everyone thinks you're the lucky one that Bernadette chose you, but she's the lucky one, too. Take care of each other."

She hugged him tightly, and he held her close. Pulling away, she produced a legal sized letter from her laptop bag that was folded in thirds. Howard stared at it curiously.

"Please, give this to Sheldon. I need him to read this. I wanted to give it to him in person, but…you know."

Howard took the envelope, looking at Amy with piteous eyes.

"I will, Ames. Good luck in Paris. Knock them dead."

Amy nodded sadly, tears filling her eyes.

"Yeah…Paris. Knocking them dead," She parroted hollowly, thrusting her hand fist in the air.

"Promise you won't forget about us?"

Amy thought back to the night they sang karaoke together, smiling at her friend.

"Never."

Amy handed her ticket and ID to the TSA agent, moving briskly through the line. Howard waited until she collected her carry on and waved goodbye before turning to leave.

He walked away in distraction, looking down at the letter in his hand. He could wait until tomorrow to give this to Sheldon. Or even later on this evening, when he would be over at his place. He had no idea what was in this letter, but maybe if Sheldon read it, he would call Amy and apologize. It was worth a shot. He left the airport quickly, hoping he would be in time.

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Sheldon couldn't get out of bed. It was early afternoon, and he had no desire to do anything.

He had called President Siebert and requested a leave of absence. The man was concerned as to why, especially since things had been going so well lately for the Physicist. But when Sheldon pointed out he still had at least eight weeks of vacation time coming, Siebert relented. Sheldon would not go into details, and Siebert didn't want to get personal anyway.

He felt terrible. He couldn't eat, sleep, and certainly couldn't work in this condition. He had locked himself in his room three days ago, after his discussion with Penny and Leonard. Yet even being in here was proving to be too much.

What was once his sanctuary, was now a reminder of what no longer belonged to him.

This whole room smelled of her-from his bed, to the curtains, to his clothing. He should never have let her in here, he thought sadly. Yet as his perfect, traitorous memory brought back the times she was in here with him, he knew he couldn't regret a single moment. Seeing her, feeling her, hearing her…the memory of her would haunt him for the rest of his life.

He was going to die alone. And what was worse, was that the reminders of her were everywhere. Perhaps he should move. Perhaps he should burn everything he owned, so that no reminder of her remained.

Turning over, he looked at the clock, tears stinging his eyes.

She was leaving now. She was probably at the airport. And he just let her go.

He spent all night debating his options, Leonard's advice and Penny's jabs from the other day playing on a loop.

Amy had called him a dozen times. He ignored every one. She skyped him. He ignored that, too. He was coming unglued. He felt like a monster. Worse than a monster.

He promised, after her illness, that he would never hurt her again. Why the hell was he doing this? Why couldn't he stop?

Was it fear? Was it jealousy? Or a mixture of the two?

Perhaps, it was because he knew he had to let her do this. And she wouldn't, unless he forced her to. A voice inside his head that sounded suspiciously like Professor Proton told him he was being an idiot.

A noise startled him, and he jumped upright in bed. Howard stood in the doorway, watching him with cautious eyes. How long had he been there?

"What are you doing here?" Sheldon asked, his voice sounding alarmed. Howard shrugged, looking down sheepishly.

"I knocked, but you didn't answer. I just came from the airport, from dropping Amy off." He said, watching for Sheldon's reaction.

Sheldon's eyes widened, his nostrils flaring slightly. But he tried to act aloof, and turned away to stare at the wall.

Howard shook his head. Even now, Sheldon was being stubborn. Pulling the letter out of his pocket, he walked over to the bed and thrust it in Sheldon's hand.

"She asked me to give this to you, Sheldon. She said you didn't want to see her. So, here…I'm sorry that you…well, never mind. I'll leave you alone."

His friend left without another word, sparing him a sad glance.

Sheldon stared at the envelope wordlessly, admiring Amy's flawless penmanship. He heard the apartment door close, signaling Howard's departure.

Gently, as to not tear one piece of the envelope or the precious cargo it contained, Sheldon opened the letter. His trepidation morphed into confusion as he recognized the handwriting inside.

_Meemaw? _

The letter wasn't _from _Amy at all. It was _to_ Amy.

His eyes quickly scanned the paragraphs, and he began to cry. He read the letter again. And then, a third time.

Dearest Amy,

I knew the moment I answered the phone that day and you were on the line asking for my Christmas cookie recipe that you were the one the good Lord had sent for my Moonpie. Your kindness, patience, and sweetness are the best things that have ever happened to my grandson. He will complain, argue, and reason away that the brain inside his noggin is his finest possession, but that's not true. His finest possession is your love.

You _love _him, Amy. For a woman my age, to see that level of devotion, is a rare and precious thing. I remember back when Sheldon's Pop-Pop and I professed our love to each other. I was so sure no matter what happened in life, we would face it together. He loved me fully until the day he left this Earth. And although I can't touch him or hear him now, he lives on in my Sheldon. I see so much of him in Shelly. Highly intelligent, kind and has an open mind. But he can be as stubborn as a pack mule. Just because we love these men doesn't mean we can't see past their shortcomings.

I told you on the phone that night that the things worth fighting for were what lasts. I know my grandson, Amy, and I know exactly what will be going through his mind the closer you two become. So I tell you this now, and you'd better listen to me, child.

_Fight_ for him, Amy. _Never_ let him push you away. Because I can tell you, without a doubt, that he will try. I love him, but he doesn't always know what's best for him. And that, my darling girl, is you. He is too smart for his own good. He can't see the forest for the trees sometimes. I have a feeling, you wield a powerful chainsaw. Knock those trees down, my girl. They will grow back, _around_ you both this time. Sheltering you. I sincerely hope that the next time I speak to you, it will be in person. Perhaps one day…I will be able to call you granddaughter… All my love, Meemaw.

Sheldon dropped the letter, its two pages falling haphazardly to the floor. He was shaking from head to toe, his breathing choppy.

Dear God…what had _done_? Meemaw implored Amy to not let him push her away. And he'd done exactly that.

His grandmother knew him so _well._ All along, Amy had fought for them. From day one, she struggled to be what he needed, what he wanted. She bended to his will, putting up with all of his insecurities, and at the first hurdle, he left her. Mostly due to his fear of the unknown and yes, his jealousy that she was advancing in her career quicker than he was. Rather than applaud her for her achievement, he used it against her as a means to cut her loose. He didn't even ask if she wanted to leave. Shame overwhelmed him as he crumbled down to the floor.

She was the best thing that ever happened to him, and now she was gone. A scream that was long dormant in his lungs came barreling out of him, frustration of everything in life he had never achieved. He was a genius, yet possessed no wisdom. He kicked and punched the air, thrashing about until he was totally spent, and still, the tears flowed. Suddenly, Penny's words from long ago came to him.

'_Strap on a pair, and go get her.'_

Suddenly, Professor Proton's words came to him.

'_Appreciate them, Sheldon.'_

This was madness. Sheer and utter madness.

"I am a man. _NOT_ a child," He yelled out, wiping his tears. He was sick and tired of letting his fear, insecurity, and doubt rule him. It had to stop.

Jumping up so fast he lost his balance, Sheldon stumbled out to the living room and grabbed his wallet by the door. He raced across the hall, banging on Penny's door and shouted her name.

"Open the door, Penny. Open it!" He yelled, his fist pounding so hard it hurt.

Penny whipped it open, speechless at the wild look on Sheldon's face and the fact he didn't do his customary three knocks.

"Sheldon, what-"

"No time for explanations. Take me to the airport now. PLEASE! I have to find Amy. I can't let her leave."

Sheldon turned without a further word, already running down the stairs. Penny stood rooted to the spot, stunned. Finally coming to her senses, she grabbed her purse and phone, racing after Sheldon.

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Penny and Sheldon drove to the airport at breakneck speed, Penny trying to concentrate on the road but Sheldon's incessant thumping on his leg and the dashboard were proving too distracting.

When the exit for LAX appeared, she turned on her signal to get over and looked over at Sheldon's determined face. He stared straight ahead, his jaw flexing. She wanted to say something, anything…but nothing seemed appropriate. Part of her was still mad at him for allowing this to happen. But she couldn't overlook the fact that he was springing into action now. Perhaps the idea that his woman was leaving him forever was enough to wake him up for good, she hoped.

"I'm going to drop you off at the American Airlines departures and go park, Sheldon. Amy may not have gone through security yet. I will meet you there as soon as I can."

Sheldon nodded, not even bothering to answer her. As soon as the car came to a halt, he flung open the door and closed it with force, before disappearing into the terminal. Penny parked in short term parking and jogged back to find Sheldon.

He had all but sprinted down the escalator toward the security area. It was full to capacity, six separate lines branching well into the belly of the terminal.

"Damn," He swore, leaning down to catch his breath. He couldn't see Amy on any of the lines, but that could mean she had already been taken into one of the x ray machines. His eyes glanced to the left, where he spied the large board of departures and arrivals. He didn't even know her flight number. He broke out in a cold sweat; how would he ever find her?

Think, Cooper, he admonished himself. She was on the 4:05 flight to JFK on American Airlines. That would narrow it down. His hawk like vision scanned the board, and when they landed on the flight she was surely on, #3356, his heart dropped into the soles of his feet.

The flight was in the final boarding stage and was probably getting ready to taxi.

He walked over to a pillar, sliding down it and squatting on his haunches. He'd lost her. She was gone. No…

Penny raced to the security area, spotting Sheldon hunched over. Her eyes filled with tears as she approached him. He moved to sit on the cold, germ ridden floor, oblivious to his surroundings and the hustle of passengers around him. He closed his eyes, whispering something over and over again to himself. Penny's heart broke for her friend. She really thought he would get to Amy in time.

_God, Sheldon…why did you let this happen?_ She thought miserably, torn for her loyalty to both friends. She understood Sheldon and his quirks, but she never thought he would allow his stubborn pride to ruin the best thing in his life. She was divided between slapping the hell out of him, and hugging him senseless in comfort.

In the end, she crouched next to him, putting her hand tentatively on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. What can I do," She asked quietly, knowing he needed time to process this. Sheldon opened his eyes, looking straight ahead.

He was a fool. A fool with an IQ of 187, but a fool nevertheless.

How could he allow Amy to leave? Why wasn't he half an hour earlier? Why wasn't he a _lifetime_ earlier? He wanted to beat the living hell out of something. Why was he so blind? Why couldn't he see what was right in front of his eyes? Meemaws words rang through his head like a symphony.

A blazing fire began in Sheldon's gut. Everything else fell away, and what he had to do became crystal clear. Rising swiftly, he began to sprint back toward the airport entrance. Penny rose, trotting after him and trying to keep up with his long strides.

"Sheldon?" She called, finally reaching his arm. "What is it?"

"I have to get out of here," He said forcefully, his feet swiftly moving him in the direction of the ticket counter.

Penny nodded, confused when he stopped and turned to face her instead of proceeding through to the exit.

"Okay…we'll leave. I'll take you home and you-…"

"No!" He yelled, frustration evident in his body language. "I'm not _going_ home. I'm going after Amy. I'm flying to New York. Hopefully I can find her during her layover. She has a layover, right?"

Penny's eyes widened as she gaped at the Physicist.

"Am I right?" He asked impatiently, and Penny finally nodded.

"Yes, three hours. She's on the 12:50 flight to Paris. I think its flight 805. But Sheldon, you might miss her. What if her connecting flight is early or-"

"Penny," He shouted in exasperation, halting her in her tracks. "Penny, I have to try. I _have_ to. Do you understand? I love her. I can't lose her. Not now, not ever. Not like _this_. If she wants to go, let it be because _she_ wants to go. Not because she believes _I_ want her to. I lied to her, Penny. I lied. I love her. I can't live without her. You were right."

Penny started sobbing, her laughter mingling in. Oh my God…finally.

Shelbot came to life.

The love and fear and strength in his eyes was shining like a beacon. She was so proud of him in this moment, and she wished mightily that Leonard were here to see this. She shook her head, grabbing his arm and leading him to the ticket counter.

"Do you want me to come with you?" She asked, already devising a plan to help him. To her great surprise, Sheldon shook his head in the negative.

"No, Penny. I have to do this on my own. It is my mistake. I have to fix this; make it right. It's time I 'strapped on a pair'," He mumbled, making Penny smile tenderly.

"Sheldon, will you be alright? You have nothing with you…" She trailed off, pointing out the obvious.

"I have money. I can buy whatever I need. I'll be fine," He assured her.

"You didn't bring your I Pad or your phone."

She thought for a moment, then reached into her pocket, retrieving her phone.

"Here. Take this with you. It's fully charged. And call us on Leonard's phone if you need anything.

Sheldon stared down at the proffered phone, then back to his friend. Her hazel eyes were shining with hope; hope for him and hope for Amy. She was a good person. He never realized until this moment how right she was the other day. She was his constant cheerleader, always supporting him and Amy. He felt something akin to shame fill him, remembering each and every insult he ever hurled at her- especially when he accused her of changing Amy. Maybe she _had_ changed Amy, but it was for the better. His girlfriend had blossomed since meeting Penny. He had to admit he had, as well.

Sheldon suddenly pulled Penny into a tight hug. He held her for a few moments, gently stroking her hair. Tears slid down her cheeks as she remained still, allowing Sheldon to express his gratitude. She knew a Sheldon Cooper hug was a rare and precious thing. She decided to savor it.

"You are a good friend, Penny. I can truly understand why Leonard loves you so much. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. It's time for me to grow up. Now go," He whispered, and he gently prodded her toward the sliding doors.

Penny gave him one last look, nodding resolutely.

"Don't forget… American Airlines flight 805."

He smiled at her, ticking his temple with his finger.

"Got it."

He turned around, impatiently thumping his foot while simultaneously checking his watch.

"Sheldon?"

He turned around, spying Penny at the entrance.

"Go get our girl and bring her home."

Sheldon nodded, his intense eyes full of hope. Then, she was gone.

"Next in line please."

Sheldon stepped up, pulling out his ID and credit card.

"I'd like a one way ticket to JFK New York City on your next flight. Any airline, if American is booked," He hastened, waiting patiently as she punched the information into the computer.

"We have a non-stop flight on American boarding in fifteen minutes with seats available, Sir."

Sheldon released the breath he was holding.

"That will do."

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The airport was quiet for this time of evening, but Amy didn't notice nor care. She had almost three hours to wait until her next flight, so she decided to head to the nearest restaurant and have a drink at the bar to calm her nerves. Who was she kidding? Nothing on earth would calm her nerves now. She was literally shaking from stress.

The flight was miserable. Each mile further away from Los Angeles was like a knife to her gut. Just when she thought she could read a book and distract herself, the seat map showed they were nearing Houston airspace. Amy looked out the small window, down into the city where Sheldon was brought into the world. A sob escaped her as she imagined the both of them, one day returning there to visit Meemaw.

Her words to Amy caused a fissure in her heart that would never be healed. Scar tissue might grow over it, thickening it someday. And that in many ways was much worse.

'…_I hope one day to call you granddaughter…'_

All of her hopes and plans lay shattered around her. She would not be marrying Sheldon one day, after all. They would never grow old together, loving each other, enjoying a life together. The reality of that settled in, hitting her like a tsunami.

She leaned her head against the glass, allowing the tears to fall.

She missed him.

She wanted him.

She loved him.

And it defied all reason and logic. It did. He was out of her realm, and it was time she came to terms with that. For as much as he tried, he would never allow himself to try _harder_. And she deserved that much. He did, too. But she couldn't allow herself to grieve for him, and what he'd lost. He'd made that choice for both of them. He told her he didn't want her; that their time together was a _'dalliance'_. That he wanted a reboot. As if she could do that now…

A drunken peck on the lips that she didn't even remember was nothing compared to five months of sleeping in the same bed, bringing each other pleasure, and making concrete plans for the future. How could he even say reboot like it was the same thing as before?

Her only choice was to grieve for herself. And she was. She cried, and didn't stop until they left Texas far behind. She fell asleep for a few minutes, waking up even more upset than before. Would it be like this forever…waking up every morning to have a few split seconds of oblivion before reality set in?

Now, sitting at the bar alone and licking her wounds, she resolved to stop crying. It was time to think of what lay ahead, not behind. The problem was, she knew in her heart of hearts, that she would never be able to shake Sheldon Cooper.

She meant what she told Penny all those years ago. He wasn't just her first boyfriend. He was the 'best' boyfriend. Everything about him attracted her. His intellect, his wit, his boyish good looks. He was damaged and annoying and could drive her crazy. Yet there would never again be a man who could send her heart soaring with only a glance. She was thoughtless to allow him to get under her skin like this. But the heart wants what it wants.

Amy sighed, fearing this feeling of hopelessness would be with her for a while. The sad part, the really sad part…was that she forgave him. She knew him; knew what he was doing. And she wished she could just hold him and tell him it was going to be okay. Even after he said those vicious things.

Amy was no fool. She knew when she entered into this relationship that Sheldon Cooper would always be Sheldon Cooper. She had no expectations, yet he exceeded them himself.

She let her mind wander back over the events of the last five months. To say she had been on an emotional roller coaster was understating things. After she woke up from her near death experience, everything had changed. Perhaps it started long before then, even before last Valentine's Day. But Sheldon was no longer as guarded as he once was.

Never had she dared to dream that Sheldon would lay down his fears and show her the intimacy he had. She remembered the evening after he altered the relationship agreement, and they playfully went to his room for a steamy make out session. God…the memory of him moving against her, and his words, his honest and raw confession of how much he wanted her, what he wanted to do to her, with her…

Tears fell again, unbidden, and she just wanted it to stop. She longed to call him and tell him he was being an idiot; that she would turn around and come home if he just asked her to. But no, he didn't want her to. He ignored her calls, her texts, and attempts at skype. He was being a child, and part of her knew he didn't mean it. Yet the bigger part of her said enough was enough.

"You big jerk. I ought to whack the crap out of you like I did to that TSA agent," She mumbled to herself.

She didn't know if leaving him that letter Meemaw wrote her was a good idea or not, but she had to try something. At least, he would know that the love they shared wasn't in her imagination. She surmised that if anyone could get through to Sheldon, it was his grandmother.

After signaling to the barmaid for another vodka cranberry, Amy rested her head on her arm. Perhaps she should send Penny a text. She promised she would, once she arrived. That conversation before she left was a definite low point.

They had stayed on the phone for almost an hour, Penny trying to soothe her tear clogged friend. She would miss Penny more than anything. Who was going to listen to her? Put up with her? Support her now…

The tears began to flow again, and Amy ducked her head before the barmaid could see. She placed the drink down, smiling sadly at her customer.

"Can I get you anything else, sugar?" She asked kindly, and Amy shook her head.

"Do they sell new hearts in those vending machines over there? Mine seems to be broken," She said, motioning to an airport sundries store. The barmaid shook her head, sympathizing.

Amy lifted her drink, toasting nothing in particular.

"This will have to do, then."

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Sheldon was anxious as the plane taxied into the gate. The flight had been uneventful for the Scientist; normally he was a raging ball of nerves up in the air. But he had one singular purpose now that commandeered his full attention: Finding Amy.

He marveled at the lack of fear he felt. It was like every ounce of adrenalin in his body was being used to fuel his mission. He couldn't allow himself to think about what he'd done; getting on a plane and flying across the country to stop the woman he loved from leaving him.

The woman he _loved_…

He had no idea where to start looking. He had no idea if she was even in this airport. What if Penny was right, and she took an earlier flight? There was no way to know. He wouldn't allow the panic to settle in. He would search every gate if he had to.

And he _did_ have to. This was not just about proving his love to Amy. It was about proving it to himself. Meemaw was right. He was a man. Those silly fears that had ruled his life for 34 years needed to stop. He realized his fears were unfounded.

Intimacy? He'd become extremely intimate with Amy. He didn't combust, and neither did she. They still had a long way to go, but still.

Germs? He touched the world around him every second of every day. He's been sick three time in his whole life. Kissing and touching obviously was fine.

Fear of losing his intelligence? In many ways, he was smarter now because of Amy. Knowing her had broadened his horizons, and made his mind a sharper instrument. It was when he allowed himself to open up to her that he truly saw what he was capable of. He realized that all of his excuses were just that: reasons to avoid contact because he was afraid.

Penny's phone dinged, alerting him to a text. He was going to ignore it, but since they landed he knew he was allowed to remove the instrument from airplane mode. He pulled it out of his pocket, expecting to see a message from her or Leonard. When he saw the sender, his eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets.

'_Hi, bestie. Arrived safe and sound in NYC about an hour ago. I didn't want you to worry. I miss you already. I miss…everyone…already. I won't lie, Penny. The flight was awful. I miss Sheldon so much. I cried for hours. Now I'm dehydrated. So I headed to the nearest restaurant to replenish. I'll call you, your time, when I arrive at my destination. There's been a change of plans. I'll explain later. Well, I guess I'll go. Don't worry about me, okay? Besides…it only hurts when I breathe. LOL, right? Bad joke. I'm sorry. I love you, Penny. And thanks…for everything.'_

Seeing her words on the screen and knowing she missed him made his heart palpitate madly. Knowing she cried over him broke his heart. God… he wasn't prepared to see her words, or what his reaction to them would be.

Change of plans? What did _that_ mean? Sheldon's blood pressure rose to an unhealthy level as he pondered what that was. Had she left already? Dear Lord…

Sheldon nearly bolted out of his seat, ready to rip the door off. They just began to disembark and he didn't want to have TSA arrest him for creating a disturbance. He patiently waited until there was an opening in the line, running onto the gangplank as fast as his long legs would carry him.

She was here! He wasn't too late. She missed him. He had to find her.

Where on Earth was she? He stopped in the middle of the terminal to catch his breath when an idea struck him like an axe. Pulling out Penny's phone, he rattled of a text to her.

'_I'm glad you arrived safely. I miss you too, Amy. So much. Where are you? Which restaurant?_'

Drat…that might tip her off. Why would Penny ask her that? He waited with baited breath for her response. He decided to head for the food court at the center of the pavilion, when it dawned on him she might not be at the same terminal. Panic began to overwhelm him just as the phone dinged again.

'_I'm at a place called Idlewild wine bar. I wish you and Bernie were here with me. Drinking alone is just pathetic.'_

Sheldon raced over to the map board, his heart racing as he looked for Idlewild wine bar. There! Terminal 1. He was at terminal 8. Running down the escalator, he jumped on the train and held on as it stopped and started.

Sheldon Cooper was brilliant. He had two PhD's, two Master's degrees, and IQ of 187. He could solve differential equations in his sleep, had an eidetic memory and could recite the Declaration of Independence at will, read the Bible cover to cover in little over two hours and recite it word for word. He could beat grandmasters at chess, outwit any opponent in any game, and never received a grade lower than an A- in his entire life.

All of that…but Sheldon Cooper was a failure.

When faced with the monumental task of opening up his heart for the woman that owned said heart, Sheldon panicked and shut down. He let his fear, his insecurity, and his jealousy consume him. Sheldon did not believe in God. He was a Scientist; he was trained to look at the Universe through calculated and factual eyes. And yet…as he approached the moment in which could make or break him forever, he had to take a moment and plead to the deity he never believed in for a reprieve. If just this once…he knew it was hypocritical. But he didn't have the strength to care.

He spied her through the glass, his heart breaking at how desolate she looked. Even with her rumpled hair and blotchy skin, she looked achingly beautiful to him. God…he made it. He wasn't too late. She was there.

He walked inside, his feet barely making a sound. There were only a handful of patrons here this time of night, and for that he was grateful. He knew he looked an absolute mess.

The barmaid who had served Amy eyed him from the counter, her curious stare at the way he was staring at Amy deepening to concern. As he drew closer to her, she kept her ears open in case the sad looking traveler needed her help. She looked in no condition to be picked up by some crazy person in an airport bar.

"Amy"? He whispered, but she didn't seem to hear him. Her profile changed, though. Her brows crinkled, and her frown deepened. Maybe she thought her imagination was playing tricks on her. He tried again.

"Amy?" He said louder, his Texas accent sharp and loud.

This time, she turned around quickly, her wide eyes locking with his. A loud gasp escaped her lips, and she almost fell off the barstool. Sheldon's senses returned and he quickly raced to secure her, grabbing her around the waist to place her back on the stool with care. Amy trembled as she felt his strong arms around her middle back and waist, holding her upright tenderly. She couldn't speak; the air had literally been knocked out from her lungs.

Sheldon gathered her close, not caring about the fact he was invading her personal space, or that she hadn't addressed him yet. She was here. She was safe.

She swiveled her head, looking up into his enormous blue eyes. Her heart banged against her ribcage. Why was he here?

"Sheldon-…"

"Shhh," He begged gently, placing his hand on her chin and using his thumb to stifle her words. "Please…just let me hold you a minute. I know I don't deserve it, but I'm begging you." He rasped.

Amy closed her eyes, the gathering tears squeezing out painfully.

"Miss, are you alright? Would you like me to call security?"

Sheldon turned his eyes, meeting the steely ones of a very pissed looking bartender. Her hand was reaching for the phone.

"I'm her boyfriend…I hope," Sheldon whispered, hoping it was enough to dissuade her from taking action. She stared him down a moment, before turning her gaze to Amy.

"Miss?" She questioned softly, and Amy nodded. The barmaid nodded, as well, leaving to give them privacy.

Amy tried to find her voice, but it took several seconds to formulate any coherent words.

"Why are you here, Sheldon? _How_ are you here?" Amy squeaked, her tears falling faster and faster.

Sheldon closed his eyes, overcome with just the sound of her voice.

"I took a flight shortly after yours. I missed you at the airport, Amy. I tried to get there in time. But you left. You left," He repeated, misery in his tone. Amy's face scrunched up in realization. He went after her. She stared at him in disbelief, and when his eyes met hers, she thought she would pass out from the adoration she saw there.

"Oh God, Amy…please forgive me. I am so sorry that I said what I said. I didn't mean it. I didn't mean it," He cried, scared to death at the resigned look on Amy's face. Was he too late? Had he completely broken her faith in him?

Amy sat back, her breath wheezing from her lungs.

"Sheldon…you hurt me. You said you wanted me to leave." She ground out, feeling weak. Sheldon took her tearstained face in his hands, wiping away the liquid with his thumbs.

"Please…I'm sorry. I know I hurt you. I'll never forgive myself for that. I need to say this, Amy. I know I don't deserve it, but please, let me say this," He begged, and Amy could only nod. She was exhausted, too tired to put up a fight. Besides…she needed to hear what he needed to say. Sheldon's eyes were boring into hers, and she knew for better or worse, this was it. She only hoped that she could withstand his confession.

"I love you, Amy. I love you so much that I can't even contain it. I _have_ always loved you. And I _will_ always love you. I don't know _what_ love is. I can't see it, I can't measure it, I can't put it under a microscope or put it in a particle accelerator and I can't test it. But I feel it. I feel it, for you. It's there, all around me, it moves in my every pore and molecule. Just when I think it's full to capacity, it spills over and fills up again and again. It's scary, and messy, and it bothers me and I hate it as much as I welcome it, and I can't breathe when you're around and I can't breathe when you're away and I wish I'd never met you and at the same time I wish I can keep you forever, and I am so sorry I walked out that door and left you without telling you how incredibly proud I am of you because…I need you, Amy Farrah Fowler. I want you. I can't live without you. And not because I need you to drive me places, or help me with fun with flags, or cater to my every whim. I need you because you are everything in the Universe that is good and the idea of living without you is making me want to throw myself in front of a bus. And you know I hate buses, Amy. You know they are full of crazy people who don't bathe and it would be just like you to allow me to end my life in such a way," He breathed out his eyes wild now and his breathing erratic.

Amy began to sob, her breath leaving her body in a whoosh. Sheldon gathered her close to his chest afraid his words had frightened or angered her. He had no right to beg her forgiveness. But by God, he would try.

Amy clutched him tightly, her head fitting under his chin perfectly. This…this was where she belonged. She burrowed into his chest, her hands sliding around to this lower back. She couldn't believe he was here. She must be dreaming.

Sheldon began to cry softly, his sobs shaking his entire body as Amy melted in his arms.

"Please…don't send me away. I know I've made the biggest mistake of my life. I know you think I'm a selfish bastard. You're in good company. But I swear, Amy. I love you," He whispered, burying his face in to her silky, fragrant hair.

He loved her hair, the comforting apple scent she used reminding him of the pies Meemaw used to bake and leave on the window to cool. She reminded him of home, of comfort. And she stirred him like no one else ever could.

"Please forgive me," He repeated over and over, his lips kissing her hair desperately.

Amy felt a tremendous weight lift from her shoulders.

"I forgive you, Sheldon. I forgive you," She assured him. "I won't send you away." She promised, tightening her hold. They remained like that, for god knew how long. The barmaid poked her head around the corner, witnessing their embrace and smiling gently. She guessed the woman wouldn't be needing that heart after all. It looked to be whole again.

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"Oh my God…it was unreal, Leonard. Just unreal. He was…normal. He took command, raced to the ticket counter, and bought a ticket. Just like that. No thoughts as to any of his routines, anything. It was amazing," Penny gushed, tears once again falling.

Leonard smiled warmly, shaking his head.

"Good for him. It's about damn time! I knew he had it in him." Leonard said, a mixture of pride and relief I his voice.

Penny nodded.

"I did, too. But seeing him in action was a sight to behold. When he banged on my door to drive him to the airport, I though he was going to take my door off the hinges. He didn't even knock three times! He was a man on a mission."

Leonard looked over at Sheldon's vacated spot.

"I hope he made it to New York alright. Should we call your phone?" He asked, concerned. The thought of Sheldon Cooper alone in a New York airport brought a mixture of humorous and cringe worthy images to Leonard's mind. Penny came over, sitting on a barstool.

"No, I think we should leave him be. If he needs us, he'll call."

Leonard didn't look convinced, even though he nodded. Penny cupped his cheek softly, sensing his concern.

"Hey…He's okay, Sweetie. He _needs_ to do this. We need to let him do it on his own."

Leonard furrowed his brows.

"I know, Penny. It's just…i guess after all of these years, I kind of feel responsible for Sheldon. I'm his little buddy," He said shyly, and Penny smiled warmly.

"I know, Honey. You've been a wonderful friend to Sheldon. Without you, he never would have made it this far. Let's just wait for him to call us if he needs to, okay?"

The more Leonard thought about it, the more he reasoned Penny was right.

"Thank you, Penny," He said lovingly, mimicking her movement and cupping her cheek. She smiled at him.

"What are you thanking _me_ for?" She asked with surprise.

Leonard smiled, rubbing her cheek with his thumb. The out of character gesture brought tears to Penny's eyes.

"For moving in next door. For loving me. For loving Sheldon. For just…being you. Thank you."

Penny was overcome with love for her fiance. She never thought when two lovable geeks helped her move in that her life would change in so many wonderful ways. They had been there for her over the years, helping her as much as she helped them. Happier than she ever thought she'd be, she jumped off the stool into Leonard's arms.

"You're welcome," She whispered, her lips meeting his. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Two would-be lovers sat in a dark, cozy booth, close together holding hands.

Heads touching, Sheldon traced patterns over Amy's hands.

"You have the cutest hands," He remarked in wonder, marveling at how strong they were for being so small.

Capable hands -a Scientists hands. He remembered with pride and humor when she trained him to dissect a brain. Her hands were steady and strong. And when they touched him in any way, they set his blood on fire. It was as curious as it was magical.

He never allowed himself to study her hands before as he held them; he simply went through the motions blithely. Now, he felt every nuance; the way the warm blood pulsed underneath, her soft skin and the way it pleasurably rubbed his own.

Touching…if felt so…right, all of a sudden.

Amy smiled, watching his long fingers caress hers absently.

They had been sitting like this, quiet, for the last hour. The clock was ticking down to her departure time, and he was too frightened to broach the subject. A lead weight was lodging itself inside his belly, though. He was frightened, but the elephant in the room had to be addressed.

Amy beat him to the punch.

"Sheldon…did you really mean what you said to me back at your apartment? Did you always think our relationship was…temporary?"

Her voice shook with fear. She had to know.

Sheldon lowered his eyes in remorse, his heart splintering.

"Oh, Amy….no. _No!_ I can't believe I said those things. I'll never forgive myself for putting you through that. I don't…I don't know what's wrong with me. It was like I knew what I was saying, but I couldn't stop. I promised that I would never hurt you again. And here I did it again. I was so scared. I…I thought I was doing it for you. I only made things worse. How could I have been so stupid? I'm so, so sorry."

Amy nodded, pursing her lips. Her entire body shuddered in relief.

"So…what happens now?"

Sheldon swallowed, his emotions all over the place.

"Now…" He echoed.

He knew what he wanted, even though it would be selfish. And he was done being selfish. But his heart and his head warred with each other.

"What do you want, Sheldon. What do you want me to do? Give me the answer now that you should have given me four days ago," She said quietly, earnestly. He turned his gaze upon her fully, marveling at the love he felt for this tiny, brilliant woman.

"I want…" He began, not sure he could voice his desires. He knew it was time to be honest with Amy, and with himself.

"I want you to come home…with me. I don't want you getting on that plane to Paris. I want to take you back to Pasadena, back to my apartment, and I want to go to sleep, with you in my arms. I'm exhausted, Amy. I'm so tired of being in this head of mine. I haven't slept in three days. I haven't been able to think of anything but your face when you walked through my door the other night. You were waiting for me to tell you not to go, that I didn't want you to leave. Those things that I said…all lies. I hope I'm not too late. I want you to come home. Please, come home with me. I realize this is a selfish thing for me to do, that your career is just as important as mine. But still, I don't want you to go. I'm not ready to be apart from you. I just realized how much I love you. I want you with me. You belong with me." He whispered, his vulnerability on display for all the world to see.

He knew he had no right to ask this of her, but the thought of losing her made him crazy. They were in an impossible situation, in his eyes.

Amy listened to his impassioned words, her tears flowing like a faucet. It was cathartic, really…crying. She'd cried a river in the last three days. For a slew of different reasons-this, she decided, was the best reason to cry.

Tears of relief. Tears of joy.

She tried to find her voice, clearing her throat.

"I was trying to explain to you the other night, Sheldon. This job- while being an amazing career opportunity, wasn't going to make or break my career. I wasn't 100 percent enthused about going. But you told me you wanted me to go. I felt I had no choice but to honor your wishes, that maybe this was your chance to be rid of me for good, without having to break it off yourself."

Sheldon listened to her words, frantically shaking his head.

"Amy…I was so frightened. I wondered…how could I possibly let you stay here after being offered such an honor. I couldn't bear the thought of you staying for me. You are brilliant, Amy. You deserve to shine. I don't want to bring you down. I thought…I thought you were tired of me already. That you were just waiting for an out. I was scared that you already made your decision, but was afraid to tell me. Amy…after the things we'd done lately, have you any idea the hold you have over me? I know I'm not he most emotional of men. I know that there are parts of me that may never be conventionally whole. But with you, I can be myself. Do you know how wonderful that is for me, to not be afraid? I just didn't want to stand in your way. I couldn't bear the thought of your resentment one day, if you felt I pressured you into passing it up. I never wanted you to leave, Amy. Quite the opposite."

Amy smiled through her tears, gripping Sheldon's hands tighter.

"I think…we've both been fools Sheldon Cooper. I think it's time we started thinking before we react, and communicating better. It's time I was honest with you as well. There is something I have to tell you."

Sheldon looked at her steadily, ready for whatever she had to say. Whatever it was, he deserved it.

"I'm not going to Paris. I refused the job yesterday."

Sheldon looked at her in confusion.

"But…Penny told me you took the position."

Amy nodded.

"I did…two days ago. But, much like you- I acted before I thought clearly. I didn't really want to go, Sheldon. With or without you, I still didn't want to go. I called Chancellor Simpson and told him the timing was wrong. I appreciated the offer, but I was declining."

Sheldon looked down, before his eyes wandered around their surroundings.

"Then…where are you going, if not Paris?" He asked her, worried now for a whole other reason. Amy shrugged.

"I'm going to Boston, to see Charlotte and Joe. I needed to get away, so I called her last night."

Sheldon looked gob-smacked.

"So…you aren't going to Paris tonight?" He asked, too afraid to hope. Amy shook her head.

"No…I'm not."

Sheldon sat back, letting out a huge gust of breath.

"Does she know? What happened between us?" He asked shamefully. "She must hate me now, after knowing what I did."

Amy shook her head slowly.

"No, Sheldon…I didn't tell her the particulars. I just told her I was facing a life crisis and needed to talk."

Sheldon looked down, not knowing where they went from here. He had put his heart on the line, and admitted his wants and fears. But Amy hadn't yet voiced what she wanted.

"Come with me." She said suddenly, earnestly.

Hopefully.

Sheldon's eyes shot to hers, his mouth agape.

"What?" He asked, not sure he was hearing her right. Amy sat forward, gripping his fingers in hers.

"Come with me, to Boston. Spend a few days there with me. I think we have a lot to discuss. And I don't want to do it on our home turf. I need some time away. Maybe you do, as well. Come with me, Sheldon."

_Come with her_? She wasn't telling him to board a plane and leave her life forever. She wanted him to join her. She said they had a lot to discuss. Which meant, she wasn't telling him they were through.

There _mus_t be a God. As Sheldon gazed in shock and wonder into the eyes of the woman he loved, he felt like falling on his knees in thankfulness.

"You…still want me to come with you? After everything I've said?" He questioned, his heart ready to burst through his chest.

When Amy nodded resolutely, he closed his eyes as a relieved sob escaped him.

"Yes, Sheldon. I want you to come with me."

Sheldon jumped up, scrambling to the entrance.

"Where are you going?" Amy yelled out. Sheldon whirled around.

"To buy a ticket, of course!" He said, disappearing from sight.

Amy got up, collecting her belongings and running after him.

A/N- Thank you for reading. More healing next chapter. A lot more. X


	32. Chapter 32

~ Chapter 32~

A/N- To say I am humbled and overwhelmed with your love of this story and your kind friendship to me is an understatement. I had NO idea when I began this story if it would even be read, let alone well received. All I can say is…Thank you.

Caution: Happier times ahead. This chapter was such a joy to write. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. PS- These song lyrics below? They are from Sheldon's POV. :) Just so you know where his mindset is.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…What have you done to me? I can't eat, I cannot sleep, and I'm not the same anymore, no no - I don't know what to do, cause all of me wants all of you, do I stand alone at the shore? Now once I could turn away from everything I feel today, but now I wanna walk through your door. And I've got to know, know, body and soul - that you've got no doubt inside and out. We are whole, whole, body and soul - don't leave me out in the cold. Just love me body and soul…" Anita Baker – Body and Soul

The light was dim when he awoke; the first glimpses of dawn filtering in through the window. He had only slept for about four hours, yet he felt rested and alert.

Sheldon opened his eyes slowly, coming to his senses. He was in a strange bed, in a strange house, in a strange city. But none of that mattered. All that mattered, was that he found Amy. He sat upright quickly, a delicious scent wafting in through the air. He didn't realize how hungry he was, after not eating for days on end.

They had arrived in Boston in the wee hours of the morning, renting a car and driving to Charlotte and Joe's house in Newburyport. They were exhausted when they arrived, both physically and emotionally.

Charlotte didn't prattle on when she opened the door to the bedraggled pair; she simply led Sheldon to the guest room and told him where to find toiletries in the bathroom. She assured him she would find something of Joe's for him to wear since they were roughly the same build. Sheldon felt a momentary sense of alarm, but was too tired and weary to care. As long as the clothes were clean, he'd make do. He nodded mechanically, his eyes fixed on Amy the entire time.

Taking Amy's hand, Charlotte led her upstairs to her daughter's room for Amy to share for the night. Amy followed her dutifully, turning the landing and catching Sheldon's eye before ascending the second flight of stairs leading to the third floor. Sheldon smiled at her gently, hating to be apart from her for even a moment.

The flight from JFK to Boston had been quiet; after their emotional reunion at the airport, both of them were anxious to just get past this awkwardness. Amy knew that everything would be alright, once they sat down and talked this out. Calmly and rationally, this time.

But for Sheldon, he felt like a prisoner who was granted a stay of execution. He wanted to do whatever it took to ensure that he wouldn't screw this up again.

Sheldon emerged from the den, making his way to the kitchen and hesitantly walking inside to where Charlotte was preparing breakfast for her children.

She looked up upon his arrival, noting he was wearing Joe's sweats and Harvard t-shirt. He looked lost and uncomfortable, and she did her best to calm him.

"Good morning, Dr. Cooper. I hope you slept well?" Charlotte ventured, smiling widely as not to scare him. Sheldon nodded wordlessly, his eyes drifting to the table laden with pancakes and bacon. His mouth literally watered.

"Yes, thank you. And please…call me Sheldon." He said cordially, meeting her gaze shyly.

"Okay, then. Sheldon. Have a seat. The breakfast is getting cold. I hope you like pancakes."

Sheldon didn't need to be asked twice. He stared at the space between Charlotte's two children, who were eyeing him up with happy curiosity. The little girl smiled a toothy grin at him, and Sheldon noted her two front teeth were missing.

"You may sit next to me." Glenn said kindly, moving over to make room for the tall man. Sheldon looked down at the boy, smiling at his manners.

"Thank you very much." Sheldon stammered out, pulling out the chair quickly. It was a strange feeling to be seated between two children, yet they were well behaved and began tucking into their breakfast, ignoring him. He sat there, too afraid to make a move, and Charlotte furrowed her brows.

"Sheldon, please. Help yourself. We have plain, blueberry, and chocolate chip pancakes." Charlotte said sweetly, pouring herself a cup of coffee. "May I get you a cup?" She asked, holding the coffee pot aloft. Sheldon shook his head in the negative.

"No thank you, Charlotte. I am not a coffee drinker."

"Alright. Would you like some orange juice instead?"

Sheldon's eyes perked up and he smiled.

Charlotte nodded, bringing him a glass before sitting down. Sheldon's eyes widened at the bounty before him.

"This smells incredible. You know…its pancake day back home. It's ironic that you made them today. But I can assure you; nothing I nor Leonard makes is _this_ good." Sheldon gushed, taking one of each flavor. He began to eat with gusto, little moans of appreciation leaving him.

Charlotte took a sip of coffee, hiding her grin behind the mug.

_Pancake Day?_

She knew from Amy that her sister's boyfriend was on the eccentric side, but a set day for meals? In a way, it was sweet. On the other hand, Charlotte wondered how anyone could have such a rigid, structured existence. She supposed being such a genius afforded the man some quirks. After all, there was a narrow margin between genius and madness.

As Sheldon ate in silence, he hesitantly looked around the kitchen. It was large and sunny, leading out to a porch bordering the beach. Sheldon admired how close to the water the house was. Although he wasn't a fan of the beach, he could see how living on the water could be aesthetically pleasing.

Charlotte watched Sheldon covertly, wondering just what had happened to send him and Amy here so abruptly. She wasn't going to pry, though. Her sister, she could work on. Sheldon was another story. Besides, she was the type of person to put people at ease…especially in her own home. He looked like a scared colt that was ready to burst down the barn door. She would thread carefully with this one.

"Sheldon, after breakfast if you'd like to go for a walk on the beach, feel free. It's a gorgeous day." She said encouragingly.

Sheldon met Charlotte's eyes, and smiled.

"Thank you. I think I will. I think some fresh air is a good idea," He said quietly.

Charlotte nodded, sneaking another piece of bacon from the plate.

"Are you Aunt Amy's boyfriend?" Glenn asked, pouring a generous amount of syrup on his third pancake. Sheldon turned to look at the child, taken aback.

"Um…yes." He said awkwardly, scratching his cheek. Glenn stuffed a piece of bacon into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

"That's what I thought. You came to Cassidy's wedding. You looked a lot different, though." He said honestly, and Sheldon knew the child was telling the truth. He feared he looked frightful this morning.

"Glenn…that isn't very nice. Apologize to Sheldon." Charlotte chided, but Sheldon rapidly shook his head.

"Oh, no. It's fine, really. I know, I don't look the best today. I was traveling all day yesterday. Amy and I both." He finished quietly, looking down. Something in his tone tugged at Charlotte's heartstrings. She surmised that this _traveling_ he was eluding to wasn't happy travels. Turning to the children, she smiled briskly.

"When you're both finished, go get dressed and then you can play on the beach with your friends," Charlotte said. Glenn and Sarah brought their plates to the sink, turning to wave at Sheldon.

"See you later, Mister." Sarah said, her missing front teeth making her lisp. Sheldon smiled at the cute child, and he found himself waving in return. Glenn walked up to Sheldon, tilting his head. Sheldon leaned back.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel bad," Glenn said sincerely, and Charlotte grinned.

Sheldon swallowed a lump in his throat.

"That's…okay. No harm done." He said, and Glenn waved goodbye. Sheldon watched them walk out, before he turned his attention back to their mother. Charlotte took pity on the Physicist.

"Sheldon…please make yourself at home. We're happy to have you," She said genially. Sheldon smiled at her.

"Thank you, Charlotte. I don't….I'm not…" He stammered, his face flushing in embarrassment.

Charlotte gave him a look of pity.

"It's alright. Amy isn't awake yet. I think she was exhausted," Charlotte hinted, to which Sheldon lowered his eyes.

"She was," He said faintly, turning his attention to the beach. "I think I'll go take that walk." He said, rising and putting his chair to right.

"Thank you for breakfast. It was delicious." Sheldon said sincerely.

Charlotte offered him a charming smile. "You're welcome, Sheldon."

Charlotte watched him walk out the door, closing it quietly in his wake. Whatever happened between her sister and this man, it wasn't good.

It was obvious, when she first met Sheldon and now, months later…that he was in love with her sister. And it was _more_ than obvious those feelings were reciprocated. She shook her head in remorse, sighing loudly. She could only hope that whatever had happened, it was reapairable.

"Oh, boy." She murmured. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Amy awoke to the sound of children's laughter. It took her a moment to realize where she was. The color pink greeted her upon awakening; pink walls, pink sheets, pink carpeting. Amy smiled as her eyes scanned the room. Her niece was in the pink stage, she gathered.

She rose from the bed and walked to the window, looking out at the beach below. She marveled at how clear the air was. The sun shone brightly, and the water sparkled. Glancing at her cell phone, she noted it was past 9 am. It wasn't like her to 'oversleep'. She wondered where everyone was; most notably, Sheldon.

She didn't even bother to brush her hair before she exited the room and headed down to the kitchen where she heard the TV playing. She wasn't accustomed to daytime TV, and didn't recognize the jovial woman's voice on the screen.

Amy peered into the kitchen, spotting Charlotte alone at the kitchen island. Her sister met her gaze and smiled.

"Oh good. You're awake," Charlotte said affectionately. Amy sat down at the table, her gaze flickering to the beach which lay just beyond the porch. Charlotte watched Amy for several moments quietly as she prepared her a cup of coffee.

"It's a gorgeous day today; yesterday was a bit overcast, but today the beach looks amazing. You should go for a walk later…clear your head," Charlotte said gently, placing the cup in front of Amy. She followed Amy's gaze down to the shoreline beyond the dune, where Sheldon was sitting on the shore seemingly deep in thought.

"He's been out there for almost an hour. Just sitting on the sand. I fed him though, when he woke up. He grew very excited when he saw we were having pancakes. He mumbled that it was 'pancake day', whatever that means," Charlotte said, shaking her head and smiling. Amy's eyes didn't leave the beach as her sister spoke.

Charlotte sighed, sitting down next to Amy.

"Amy…are you okay? Is Sheldon okay? What's going on? Not that I mind a visit from you in the slightest, but…when I spoke to you the other day, you sounded terrible. Now you arrive with Sheldon in tow, in the middle of the night. Did something happen?" She asked gently.

Amy bit her lip, nodding her head.

"Yes. Something happened." She said, taking a deep, shaky breath in and then releasing it. Charlotte sat on the edge of her chair, giving her baby sister time to gather her thoughts.

"Last Sunday I went to a meeting at Berkeley. What I thought was a discussion about a new grant for my research, turned out to be a job offer for me. The Chancellor there, Dr. Simpson, was asked on behalf of The Sorbonne to recruit me."

Charlotte didn't blink for a moment, her brows furrowing.

"_The_ Sorbonne? In France?" She questioned, already having an inkling of where this conversation was headed. Amy nodded, finally looking away from the lone figure on the shore.

"Yes. I was stunned and confused; I mean, being asked to work at such a University is a huge honor. On paper, it looked perfect. Yet…something felt off about it. I spent a whole day debating the pros and cons. In the end, I decided it just wasn't what I wanted. No matter how wonderful an opportunity it appeared to be."

Charlotte nodded cautiously, _her_ gaze now focused on the man outside who was staring at the ocean like it held the key to the Universe.

"I'm guessing from the way you sounded on the phone the other day, Sheldon didn't take the news well?"

Amy nodded, letting out a nervous chuckle.

"Um…no. But I wasn't the one who broke the news to him. His boss did, congratulating him on my behalf. He must have heard from the President of Caltech about it and assumed Sheldon knew. The trouble was, I didn't tell him right away. And Sheldon was upset about that."

Charlotte thought back to Cassidy's wedding, and how out of place Sheldon looked. She was no psychologist, but she hazarded a guess that Sheldon would have thought the worst when he heard such news.

"So what _was_ his reaction?" She asked kindly, and felt tears prick her eyes when Amy's face fell.

"He…totally shut down on me. He told me that we were done. That…that our relationship was a dalliance, and that it'd run its course. He said he wouldn't let me give up my 'dream' to stay in Pasadena for him. He wouldn't even talk to me about it, Char. He ignored me for three days, and he let me get on that plane."

The kitchen was quiet as Charlotte absorbed Amy's words. After a few minutes, she put her arm around her sister comfortingly.

"But he came after you, I'm guessing…by the fact he is here with you now. Surely, that means something, Amy." She said softly. Amy offered a wan smile.

"Yes…he came after me. He broke down at the airport, begged my forgiveness, and told me he lied about everything he said."

Charlotte let out a huge gust of air, taking a sip of her coffee. This sort of thing only happened in movies, or so she thought. She couldn't see the man she fed pancakes to earlier behaving in such an irrational way. But then again, people in love do strange things.

"Wow…that is just. Wow."

"Yeah," Amy agreed, tears once again filling her eyes.

"And…do you believe him?" Charlotte asked gently. Amy nodded positively.

"Yes. Of course I believe him. I just…I _hated_ the way he handled the whole situation. I don't know, Char…it seems like any time we make some progress, Sheldon lets his fears get in the way. He's a wonderful man. At least,_ I_ think he is. But he's a handful." Amy admitted seriously.

Charlotte nodded at her sister, biting her lip in thought.

"Amy, I want to share something with you that I never told anyone. Not even Mom."

Intrigued, Amy pulled her chair closer to her sister's. "Alright."

"When Joe and I were first married, we went through a rough patch. Between his long hours first getting his degree, and then spent at the firm trying to work his way up to partner, we barely saw each other. Things got…tense. For a while. I met an old boyfriend of mine from college who was in town for dinner and…he told me he still cared for me. And…he wanted to have an affair."

Amy stared at her sister, totally shocked.

"What did you do?" She asked fearfully.

Charlotte smiled dimly, relieving Amy's worst fears.

"I told him that I was in love with my husband. And that no matter what rough waters we navigated, we were on that ship together. Things were not good at that moment, but they got better. _Much_ better. Because we both gave of ourselves to improve upon what was already wonderful. Love, Amy…_true_ love, isn't exempt from hardship. Sometimes, it goes even _deeper _through the fire, because it's forged by something greater than what we can see. It's soul deep. If you feel it, _truly_ feel it…then it's more real than anything you can see, anyhow."

By the time Charlotte finished, Amy was in tears. She lowered her face into her hands, letting the emotions overtake her. Charlotte pulled her close, offering her sister the comfort she knew she needed.

"Charlotte…I don't know what to do. I love him. With every fiber of my being. But everything between us is so…difficult. I'm scared to let him have my heart. He might break it irrevocably," Amy sobbed.

Charlotte nodded, trying a different approach. She didn't know how to break it to her poor sister that her heart didn't seem to be in her possession any longer, anyway.

"Let me ask you this, Amy…was anything broken that _really_ cannot be repaired? Anything said that can't be forgiven? They're just words, you know, spoken in anger or fear. I'm not saying he was justified to say them. But have they done irreparable harm?" She asked seriously.

After a moment, Amy shook her head in the negative.

"No…truthfully, I didn't believe him anyway. But it still hurt, knowing how easily he could have said them. He acts like a petulant child most of the time. I just wish he would think before he acts, sometimes."

Charlotte nodded in agreement.

"Words hurt, Amy. No doubt about that. And in a mature relationship based on trust, hurtful words are unacceptable. But he is human. So are you. The question is- where do you want to go from here? What do _you_ want?"

Amy's eyes roamed over to the beach once again, where Sheldon was still sitting.

She wanted _him_. Plain and simple.

Charlotte smiled gently, already knowing Amy's answer.

"That's what I thought," She said, and Amy met her compassionate gaze.

"Looks like I'm in trouble," She said, acceptance in her voice. Charlotte rolled her eyes.

"Sis…you were in trouble the day you went on that blind date to that coffee shop." Charlotte joked, and this time, it was Amy who rolled her eyes.

"I blame mother. It's all _her_ fault."

Charlotte chuckled, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Yep. It usually is. But thank God for her, right?"

Amy smiled, demurely biting her lip. She thought back to when she first laid eyes on Sheldon Cooper, and how even though she played it cool, inside her heart was jumping madly. Something about him touched her immediately. Five years later, she was no less under his spell. Meeting him had changed her life, and her views on love. Whatever happened from this point on, she would fight her hardest to make him believe that.

"Yeah. Thank God." She whispered.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Amy made her way down to the shoreline where Sheldon was sitting crossed legged on the sand. Children were all around the beach at play, as it was the last week of summer vacation. She could see his curious gaze watching the children, and Amy wondered what was going through his mind.

He seemed so…different, somehow. The Sheldon Cooper she knew could not stop talking about every subject under the sun. Whether from exhaustion or something else, Amy was wasn't sure where this subdued behavior was coming from.

Somehow, he sensed her approach, because as she drew alongside of him he turned his head to gaze at her. A wisp of a smile crossed his features as he studied her. The sunlight was playing in the strands of Amy's hair, making her appear to have a halo. He marveled at how lovely she looked in the light.

He never allowed himself to simply appreciate her and all her beauty. He had always pushed those feelings aside, choosing instead to wax poetic about her intelligence. While her intelligence had certainly attracted him to her, it wasn't the sole reason for those feelings anymore.

Amy sensed Sheldon's perusal of her, and it made her feel strange. Warm all over, which had nothing to do with the weather. He rarely gazed at her for any amount of time. She found it unnerving now to know she had his complete and total attention.

Amy gathered up her courage, steeling herself.

"Sheldon…we need to have a serious talk," She said, her voice neither tender nor cold. Sheldon nodded solemnly, knowing this was coming. And a long time at that.

A lump formed in his throat as he thought of all of the times he cheated her out of compliments, words of affection, and affirmation that she was, in fact, beautiful. He closed his eyes, and the words that had laid so long dormant in his heart came pouring out.

"The day after you were brought in to the hospital, I found myself in the hospital chapel. I didn't go there consciously. At least, I don't think I did. At first, I felt angry. Angry at myself, angry at you, angry even at a god I don't believe in. I found myself…bargaining. With whomever would listen. I wanted you back _so_ badly. I thought if I could take your place, I would. I said I would even give you up, if that's what it would take to bring you back. I reasoned that Science needed you. And then…this wonderful opportunity came calling for you. I thought…it was my retribution. My comeuppance." He said sadly, and Amy could tell he truly believed that. She closed her eyes in silent understanding.

"The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, Amy. When Gablehauser told me about your job offer, I was stunned. The first thing I thought was, how proud I was of you. But then…I worried why you didn't tell me about it. You didn't even mention that you had something to tell me, when we spoke about meeting the next day. I was scared you were avoiding me, because deep down, you wanted to go. And I guess that frightened the daylights out of me. Because if you wanted to go so badly, what did that mean for me? For _us_?"

Amy watched Sheldon's face crumple with his admission. He was scared of losing her, so in true Sheldon fashion, he formed a pre-emptive strike and broke up with her first. She realized in that moment that had it been anyone else, she probably would have said this stress wasn't worth the effort.

But…it _wasn't_ anyone else. It was Sheldon. And she loved him more than anything on Earth.

_Fight for him, Amy_.

"Sheldon….you thought that you had to give me up so that I would be able to excel professionally?" She asked quietly, trying to meet his eyes. He refused to look at her, though.

"That's part of it, but not all. There was another reason I made such a mess of the situation," He said hesitantly. Amy put her soft hand upon his shoulder comfortingly.

"And that is?" She asked tenderly. Sheldon turned away from the water, to face her completely.

"That I would give you up, if that's what would make you happy. I'd sacrifice my wants and wishes for yours. I'd let you go, to flourish and to grow…So I wouldn't be a hindrance to you. I know I'm hard to deal with, Amy. And I know that if you had to be focused on your work that I may not factor into your life anymore. I only wanted the best for you. The very best. Because…I'm in love with you, Amy."

Amy felt her breath leave her in a whoosh. She knew Sheldon loved her. He'd said so on many occasions. But to say he was _in_ love with her…

"You are?" She asked him in disbelief, her face lit from within. Sheldon wanted to cry at the radiance of her. That's all it took, he realized, to set her soul ablaze. Simply telling her the truth of his love, and her allowing herself to believe it. His dear, sweet Amy.

_Of course, I am. Of course…_

Sheldon shook his head in silent affirmation.

"Yes. So much. I've heard it said that a man in love does crazy things. Good Lord…they were right. It seemed the deeper I fell, the more afraid I became. But it wasn't you I feared, Amy. Nor a physical relationship with you. It was…me. All along. I pushed you away time and again because I couldn't believe something so wonderful was meant for me. I kept telling myself that I was a Homo Novus, until I believed it. Now I know…all of my life, I was waiting for you. Only you. And then suddenly, you were _there. _It was like I conjured you up out of thin air. And you were just so…perfect. The mirror image of myself, but with this fun, loving side to you that captivated and enchanted me. Before I knew what was happening, you were on my mind constantly. You stole my heart. And I was no longer in control, of anything. _That_ was what I feared most of all," He admitted quietly.

He took her hands in his own, running his thumbs over her knuckles. The action was as soothing as it was arousing.

"I have no idea how to do this, Amy. I've never been here before. I'm terrified. But you must know….I trust you. And I want you to be happy. If you truly want to leave to forge a career in Paris, then I will support you. I couldn't bear you to give up your dreams for me. That would be the ultimate in selfishness, and I'm trying so hard not to be. If you still wanted me, after the mess I've made of this situation… then I would leave Pasadena and come with you. Because I never want to be without you again."

Amy swallowed thickly.

"You'd really do that for me? Give up your life here, your friends…everything you know, to follow me into some unknown future?" She asked him, incredulously. Sheldon bit his lip, nodding quickly.

"Yes. I can't expect you to give up your dreams because I'm an insecure man. I've done a lot of thinking this morning about if the roles were reversed. You may not be happy with my leaving, but you would have at least discussed it with me. Not have flown off the handle like I did. That's the difference between us, Amy. You are able to articulate your feelings so much better than I am. I know I've behaved disgracefully. I know you think I found it easy to say what I said, but nothing is further from the truth. I love you Amy. And I wish I could take it all back. I'm so very sorry."

It was the most honest speech Sheldon had ever made to her. She stood there before him, in complete and total awe of who this man is, and who he'd become. The man she met five years ago in that coffee shop would never have said such things. Was it fate? Was it time that had softened him? Was it her influence- her love? Or was it simply Sheldon? Growing as he should. Evolving.

Ever evolving.

She tightened her grip on his hands, loving the feel of them entwined with hers.

"I don't know what to say, Sheldon, other than thank you. It means the world to me that you would say that. And yes…I still want you. I will _always_ want you. But I don't want to go to Paris. I never did. You didn't give me a chance to explain." She said, pointing out the obvious.

"I want to do this…whatever it is…on my own. I don't want to share credit with other Scientist's for my work. I've worked too hard to get where I am, and I fear being a woman in a man's field will relegate me to the sidelines. Don't get me wrong; it was a wonderful honor to be chosen. But it isn't my heart's desire."

Confused, Sheldon stared at her.

"Then why didn't you tell me about it when you found out?" He asked in a small voice. Amy sighed impatiently.

"I didn't want to tell you over the phone, or in a text. I didn't know Gablehauser was going to tell you. I can imagine what you thought upon hearing that. But you should have trusted me, Sheldon. You should have let _me_ explain. You planned out our entire future, making choices for both of us based on an assumption. For a genius, that was an awfully stupid thing of you to do." She said seriously, and for once, Sheldon had no choice but to agree with her. He _had_ acted stupidly, nearly costing them both a chance at happiness.

He looked at her in longing, his deep eyes cutting lasers through her. He'd never looked at her like he had the last twenty four hours. It was though a curtain had been lifted off of the stage of his soul. Perhaps he'd looked at her like that all along, and she never noticed it.

"When are you going to get it through that head of yours that I love you, Sheldon? What on Earth goes through that mind, anyway?" She said, her tone soft.

Sheldon stared at her mutely, said mind not able to comprehend what she was saying. After a few moments, Amy smiled warmly.

Sheldon stepped closer to her, realizing how it was he sensed her arrival earlier. It was her lovely apple scent which followed her wherever she went. He would know that scent anywhere, even in death.

"_You_, Miss Fowler, are what goes through my mind," He whispered, stroking her cheek with the back of his fingers. "Constantly."

Torn between smiling and crying, Amy averted her eyes. Sheldon tried to catch her gaze.

"What is it?" He asked tenderly. Amy shook her head, trying to dispel her sad thoughts.

"When I was in the air, I looked at the air map and noticed we were flying over Texas. More precisely, Houston. I got this pain in my chest that I never want to feel again. I thought I was never going to see you again. I thought of Meemaw, and that she was down there somewhere. I couldn't breathe, Sheldon. It hurt so much." She gasped, the tears rolling down her cheeks.

He hated to see her cry. He hated more that he was the cause of her tears.

"I'm so sorry Amy. It's all my fault. I should never have let you go in the first place. What you must have thought of me," He lamented, closing his eyes tightly. "I keep letting you down. Every time I think I'm gaining ground, I mess things up again. I'm hopeless," He said sadly, shaking his head at his own failings.

Amy laid a comforting hand upon his cheek.

"I've always thought the world of you, Sheldon. I know your struggles. I do. And I will continue to support you in any way you need. But you _cannot_ shut me out. Please, promise me. Before everything else, we were always friends. I want my friend back. The one who laughed with me, plotted with me, enjoyed my company. Come back to me," She begged, her honesty disarming him. He nodded, swallowing thickly as he felt the emotion in her voice overwhelm him.

"I want my friend back, too. I've missed her." He whispered sincerely. "I read the letter Meemaw gave you. That was what prompted me to get off of my rear and go get you. She would have skinned me alive if I hadn't reached you in time."

Amy chuckled through her tears as she watched Sheldon's face morph into an expression of actual fear.

"Meemaw is a wise woman, Sheldon. I'm glad you took her advice. If for nothing else, I really didn't want to eat Parisian food. I would have gained twenty pounds. Do you know, they cook everything in butter?"

Sheldon's eyes crinkled as he realized what Amy was doing. Once again, she turned a terrible incident into one to be laughed about. To think he almost threw this away. He would never, ever…take her for granted again.

"Oh, I don't know Amy…a little more meat on these bones wouldn't hurt a thing. You know how much I love your figure, anyhow. If you gained twenty pounds, there would just be more of you to love."

Amy's eyes widened in shock.

"Y-you love my figure?" She questioned, her heart beating wildly at his confession.

Sheldon simply pulled her close, lowering his head to rest upon her shoulder. Amy reached up and cradled his head, stroking his hair gently.

"Very much," He whispered, sighing deeply. Amy closed her eyes, certain paradise could be no better. Her sister was right. This love was too big to contain, too precious to throw away. But she thought she would warn Sheldon, just in case.

"Just so you know…if you _ever_ pull a stunt like this again, I will hide a hundred dirty socks in your apartment and you will spend weeks trying to locate them all. Are we clear, Dr. Cooper?" She asked with fire in her voice.

Sheldon sighed happily. No amount of soiled hosiery could scare him anymore. Not after almost losing his Vixen; not once, but twice.

"Crystal clear, Dr. Fowler." He managed, unable to fathom the alternative.

They continued to embrace, holding each other tighter and tighter until they looked to be one being instead of two. Finally, Amy pulled back and gave Sheldon a questioning stare.

"I was wondering…how did you ever find me at the airport?"

Smiling, Sheldon reached into his pocket and produced Penny's phone. The pink case encrusted with crystals was definitely _not_ that of her boyfriends, Amy thought in confusion.

"I left without taking anything with me except for my wallet. Penny drove me to airport, and gave me her phone since I'd left mine."

Understanding dawned on Amy's face.

"You read my text to Penny," She said in amazement. Sheldon nodded slowly.

"Yes…I did. I read your text."

Amy shook her head.

"It was you _who_ asked me what restaurant I was at."

Sheldon blushed, looking away sheepishly.

"Yes."

A throaty chuckle escaped Amy's mouth. Sheldon looked at her, wide eyed. He thought she'd be upset, knowing what she told Penny in confidence about him. Instead, Amy looked happily surprised.

"Well played, indeed. You are _truly_ the genius you appear to be."

Sheldon quirked his lips in shyness.

"Well…I suppose. I simply used deductive reasoning. Any Scientist worth their salt would have figured it out."

Amy laughed heartily.

"Impressive, Dr. Cooper._ Most_ impressive."

The Empire Strikes Back quote she was referencing made Sheldon's head spin.

_Vixen_. Using his beloved Star Wars to make him crazy. He gazed at her a moment, so happy and relieved that finally, finally…they were on the same page.

"Thank you, Dr. Fowler. A compliment like that from one as esteemed as you is truly appreciated."

They began to walk in circles about the shore, getting chased by the waves. Amy dipped her toes in the cool water.

"You must admit…that _was_ rather lucky. What if I hadn't texted Penny until after I'd arrived here?"

Sheldon raised a brow at her.

"Luck? We're Scientists. We don't believe in luck."

Amy pondered that.

"True… but that doesn't answer my question, though."

Sheldon looked ahead, trying to formulate an answer.

"I…I don't know. Maybe…it worked out the way it was _meant_ to."

Amy stared at Sheldon in shock. There were many arguments, either way. Right now, she didn't care about any of them.

"Perhaps it did," She said softly.

Sheldon looked at her, letting it sink in that he _did_ find her. After a moment, they fell in line next to one another, walking down the beach.

Charlotte watched them a moment from the window, smiling amidst her tears before turning away to offer the couple some privacy.

Sheldon and Amy spent eight days in Newburyport. After the emotional week before them, this week was in direct contrast to the drama they had shared. They spent their days touring the charming town, relaxing by the water, and talking. _Really_ talking. Like they did in the beginning of their courtship, all those years ago.

Glenn and Sarah were on their last week of summer break, and Sheldon found he rather enjoyed doing fun things with Amy's niece and nephew that he never allowed himself to do before. They played Frisbee on the beach, rode bikes along the boardwalks on Plum Island, and one evening Joe even made a bonfire on the sand. They roasted hot dogs and marshmallows, chatting and laughing.

Sheldon had always shunned _relaxing_ as a dirty word. But now, he felt like a kid again as he and Amy explored, rested, and reconnected.

Three days into their stay, Amy surprised Sheldon with a trip to Boston where they spent the day touring points of historical interest. It was the most fun he'd ever remembered having. And for a man who had enjoyed 15 Comic Cons, that was saying something.

Sheldon had to buy some new clothes in town, since he flew out of LAX like a bat out of hell, and was pleasantly surprised at the cool selection this sleepy burg offered. He even found a batman t-shirt in one of the comic shops along the main drag. He felt more like himself again, and that helped put his mind at ease.

In the evenings, they would share dinner with Charlotte, Joe, and the kids. Amy was amazed at how easy Sheldon blended in with them all; his previous social awkwardness nowhere to be found as he chatted with Glenn about his upcoming new Semester's Science project, or Sarah about her ballet lessons. This was a completely different Sheldon than the one she knew. He was still Sheldon. Just…better. She couldn't explain it. But she didn't need to. This was them, Sheldon and Amy, making this work. Starting over from a place where they were equals.

Each night, they parted at the staircase to say goodnight; Sheldon to the den guestroom and Amy to Sarah's room. Not only was it improper for them to share a bed here, they both knew they needed time to regroup separately after the painful events of late. That didn't diminish the feelings of longing, though.

Amy found herself falling in love with Sheldon all over again as their daily interactions were laced with a playful flirtation and depth. Even when he pointed out the history of their town to Charlotte and Joe, he didn't do it in his usual condescending manner. Joe found Sheldon fascinating, especially his eidetic memory, and the two men would have interesting conversations after dinner while Charlotte and Amy cleaned up.

Her heart felt full as she watched him build a huge sandcastle on the shore with Glenn one afternoon, their combined effort's resulting in a magnificent structure that had people coming from all over the beach to take a look and snap a picture of it.

It was no wonder; after all, he built things all the time. He was a creator, whether with his hands or with his mind. It excited her that his intelligence was as advanced as it was. She was in awe of her boyfriend, now more than ever. If only _he _could see what she saw when she looked at him.

Sheldon, for his part, felt like a man renewed. The days with Amy were light and meaningful. They would be returning to their real life soon enough. Seeing her here, so carefree and happy, made his heart soar. After what he just put her through, he couldn't apologize enough.

At night, when the house was quiet, he just lay there in the den and wondered if she was upstairs thinking of him as he was thinking of her. He just wanted to lay beside her. He needed to absorb her warmth and nearness, but felt too shy to make the first move. He knew he hurt Amy badly by his thoughtless actions. He would wait for her cues as to if she welcomed his advances again.

Their last night there, Amy and Sheldon decided to watch the kids so that Joe and Charlotte could go out for dinner. Sheldon and Glenn played a competitive game of table tennis, while Sarah helped Amy in the kitchen preparing a meal that would soon become a favorite in Sarah and Glenn's house: spaghetti with hog dogs. As the four sat down to dinner, Sheldon looked over at Amy who was laughing at something Sarah said. The feeling that came over him in that moment was overwhelming. Sitting down to a meal with Amy, around a _table_ no less…with children.

It felt…_Right_.

Suddenly, Sheldon felt like the Universe was shifting once again. In that moment, he could envision a future where he and Amy were married and they were sharing dinner with their own children. And rather than freak out, he allowed those feelings to blossom within him, and stay with him.

"Your mom made this for you when you were my age?" Glenn asked, shoving a forkful of pasta into his mouth. He slurped the spaghetti off of the fork, making Sheldon narrow his eyebrows and laugh.

"Yes, she did. It was one of my favorite dishes, especially if I were sad," Sheldon said, fondly remembering Mary and how she doted on him. Glenn speared a hot dog piece, eyeing it with glee.

"Are you sad now?" He asked innocently, his young eyes meeting Sheldon's.

Sheldon smiled at the boy, knowing without looking that Amy's eyes were on him. He momentarily glanced over to her before answering him.

"Not anymore," He said quietly, and Amy smiled.

"I think this is my new favorite dish," Sarah gushed, spaghetti sauce all over her face. Both Sheldon and Amy laughed, shaking their heads, as Glenn rolled his eyes. His little sister was such a baby, sometimes.

The boys helped clean up after dinner, bringing the plates to the sink for Amy to wash. Sarah did her best to help, putting away the sprinkle cheese and milk back into the refrigerator. Before the foursome realized it, the task was done. They settled in to watch Frozen on DVD, which Sheldon surmised was for the 'nth time, judging by how both children knew each and every line and song.

It wasn't so bad, though; it was a Disney production, and he loved Disney. Surprisingly, when the movie ended, he hadn't even realized it. The time had flown by.

Amy gathered up her niece and nephew, helping them pick up their toys and blankets.

"Come on, kiddo's. Bedtime. Say goodnight to Sheldon." She said, and one by one the kids walked over to say goodnight. Glenn was first, holding out his hand for Sheldon to shake. Sheldon chuckled as he took the small hand in his own.

"Aunt Amy told us earlier that you're leaving tomorrow. I just wanted to say that it was nice having you here. Thank you helping me build the sandcastle. It was the biggest and best ever. Maybe if you come back, we can build an even bigger one."

Sheldon's throat closed as he stared at the ten year old; he was sharp as a tack and so happy. Had he _ever_ been that happy, as a child? He cleared his throat, eyes fixed on the boy with admiration.

"I would like that very much, Glenn. Thank you." He said tenderly, to which Glenn smiled. He walked away, smiling at Amy.

"Goodnight, Aunt Amy."

Amy's eyes followed him as he ascended the stairs.

"I'll be up in a minute to tuck you in, alright?" She said warmly.

Sarah was less cordial, throwing herself at Sheldon clumsily. He staggered backward, amazed at the strength the little 7 year old possessed. Her tiny body felt so fragile against his large frame, and Sheldon had the momentarily instinct to hug her and protect her.

"You smell like baby powder," She said sweetly, giggling as she kissed Sheldon's neck. He momentarily lost his breath feeling the tiny lips on his skin, the kiss delivered in such a sweet way. As she pulled away, Sheldon stared at her dumbly.

"It's…talc." He whispered dumbly, and Amy was transported back to another time, another place…His voice sounding so much like it did that night, when Amy told him the very same thing.

She herded her niece upstairs, all the while Sheldon sat there in a stupor. Amy stole a glance at him before she followed Sarah.

"I'll be back soon," She said, and Sheldon nodded.

Little voices, little faces, little hands, little brains, little limbs. Big hearts.

They were great kids. Of course, they would be. They shared DNA with Amy Farrah Fowler, after all.

Almost an hour passed while Amy read them a bedtime story. Sheldon sat there on the couch, going over the last week and a half in his mind. He felt relaxed, focused, and…happy. _Very_ happy.

Amy descended the stairs, turning off the stairwell light.

"Are they asleep?" Sheldon asked quietly as Amy came back to the living room and sat down next to him on the couch.

"Yep. They are tuckered out. I had no idea you were such a table tennis champion, Sheldon. You gave poor Glenn a run for his money," Amy chuckled, settling in closer to him. If he noticed her movements, Sheldon didn't mind. He, in fact, turned toward her as well. They were still feeling each other out, trying to gauge the other's comfort level.

"It was the only game that didn't require me to be very athletic. It was also the one game growing up that I could beat George Jr. at." He said, remembering. "And who are you trying to fool? Your nephew is a ringer. Are you sure your sister doesn't have him playing in underground tournaments?" He asked seriously, earning a throaty laugh from Amy. He laughed along with her, smiling affectionately at her unguarded mirth.

It was nearing ten pm, and both of them were tired. They would be flying home to Pasadena tomorrow; Sheldon was returning to work on Monday, and Amy had to call Chancellor Simpson as well as Dr. Fontaine to explain. She had sent them each an email before she went to the airport the other day, to which they both graciously replied with understanding. Still, she felt she owed them a full explanation.

They turned to each other in the silent room, the air heavy with unspoken things. Amy chanced a smile in Sheldon's direction, and he returned it sweetly.

"Would you like to watch a bit of TV before bed?" She asked him, trying to ease some of the tension in the atmosphere. Sheldon bit his lip, nodding.

"Um…Yes. I suppose." He murmured, but he really didn't want to watch TV or hear any voice other than Amy's.

They both reached for the remote at the same time, and when their hands touched, it was like a match had been thrown on gasoline. Amy looked up at Sheldon to find him staring at her intently. He didn't release her hand, and she didn't release his.

The last seven days, they hadn't touched once. Not since their hug on the beach that morning. The need which was between them crackled intensely. His eyes slid down to her mouth, and he lost his breath as he watched her lick her lips. She wanted his kiss as badly as he wanted to give it to her.

He would grant her wish, gladly.

The next thing she knew, Amy was pulled into Sheldon's arms as he kissed her mouth hungrily. Her body melted into his, her warmth threatening to burn him alive where he sat. He had missed her, so damn badly. He never thought he would get to touch her again. Feel her touch upon his skin. To think he almost threw this away grieved him.

Amy kissed him back desperately, running her hands along his face and neck, and through his soft hair. Anywhere she could reach. Her touch ignited a firestorm of want inside of Sheldon. When her tongue tentatively caressed his lower lip, Sheldon opened his mouth on a low moan, lost in the sensations she was dragging out of him. His body felt boneless as it slid down the couch, taking Amy with him.

"Oh, Amy…I want you. I want you," He murmured, rendering Amy dizzy. Clumsily, she pulled back in a daze to stare at his face. His eyes were wild, his mouth slack, and he was panting, like he had just run a marathon.

"W-what?" She stuttered, not daring to believe her ears. Sheldon blushed fiercely, but his gaze didn't waver. If anything, it grew even more intense.

"I'm sorry. I know…I know you weren't expecting that. But I can't hide it anymore, Amy. I've been denying my feelings for so long, and I can't anymore. I told you once, when I had a feeling I know it. I'm telling you now. I want you. So much. I've _missed_ you so much. I thought I would never get to feel you again. I just…I want you. _All_ of you." He admitted ardently, his breath escaping him in pants.

Amy's eyes grew wide as Sheldon's words sunk in.

"Sheldon…we can't. Not…now. Not…here," She began, and despite the situation, Sheldon snorted.

"Amy, I know that! I'm not crazy," He said in humor, and Amy breathed a sigh of relief. She looked at her boyfriend expectantly, waiting for him to elaborate.

Sheldon took a deep breath, meeting her gaze seriously.

"Our anniversary is coming up." He stated.

Amy nodded.

"Yes. I know." She said in delight, surprised that he even remembered. But of course he remembered, she thought. He remembered everything.

Sheldon licked his lips, his eyes not leaving hers. She could see the wheels turning in his head.

"Proposal," He said, and Amy was all ears. She arched her brow, urging him to continue. Usually when he began a sentence as such, something delicious followed.

"I would like to take you away for the weekend, for a romantic getaway. Just the two of us." He threw in, and Amy smiled widely.

"Accepted." She said warmly. Sheldon let out a sigh of relief. "Are you sure, Sheldon?" She asked him cautiously.

He looked down to the ground first before meeting her eyes. He knew what she was talking about, and he wasn't scared at all.

"Yes. Very sure. More sure than I've _ever_ been," He affirmed, his voice deep and sensual. Amy felt her pulse jump as his meaning became very clear. In an instant, chills overcame her. They stared at each other in silence for a moment which stretched into five, until they were both startled by the unlocking of the front door.

Sheldon wanted to jump up and escape to the den, certain Charlotte and Joe would be able to see the depravity in his eyes over what he was thinking. But that would look too obvious, right? So he stayed put, clearing his throat and putting an arm across the couch awkwardly. He rolled his eyes as even he knew he looked ridiculous. Amy smoothed down her hair, looking down shyly as her sister and brother-in-law entered the living room.

"Hi, you two. Kids off to bed okay?" Charlotte asked, her gaze flickering between her sister and Sheldon. Amy smiled, trying to swallow down her embarrassment.

"Yes. Fine. I read them Where the Wild Things Are. They fell fast asleep. After Glenn whipped the pants off of Sheldon at ping pong," She said slyly. Both Charlotte and Joe's eyes swung to Sheldon, who looked positively scared. Amy chuckled at his discomfort as he looked down to the khaki's he sported.

"I didn't mean, your _literal_ pants," Amy snarked, to which Sheldon chuffed.

"Well, I know that, little lady. My pants are still intact, as you can see." He said in mock sarcasm, and Charlotte didn't fail to see the blush that bloomed on her little sister's face. Her eyes met Amy's and Charlotte raised her brows saucily.

"How was dinner?" Amy asked, changing the subject from Sheldon having no pants to a more tolerable one. Joe smiled, gathering Charlotte close to him.

"It was wonderful. Thank you both so much for watching the little ones so we could have a night to ourselves. You both are so fortunate right now, having so much free time. Don't waste it," Joe said merrily, winking at his wife.

Sheldon smiled, his eyes meeting Amy's.

"We won't," He whispered huskily, loving how Amy's blush deepened.

A silent understanding passed between the two.

Joe excused himself with a goodnight, Shaking Sheldon's hand and kissing Amy. Sheldon, likewise, said goodnight to Charlotte, thanking her for her hospitality. He turned to Amy, swallowing deeply as their eyes met.

"Goodnight, Amy." He whispered.

"Goodnight, Sheldon."

He sauntered off to the den, both Fowler women watching him go. Charlotte turned to her sister with an evil glint in her eye after the den door closed.

"So…what's this about Sheldon's pants coming off?" She said, giggling. Amy rolled her eyes.

"First of all, cool it. The man has Spock like hearing and can probably pick up every word you just said," She whispered, her tone chiding. Charlotte wasn't to be deterred.

"You didn't take his pants off with my kids around, did you?" She whispered in a scandalous tone. Amy balked, failing to see Charlotte was teasing.

"How could you ask that? What do you take me for?" She whispered in annoyance. Charlotte pretended to think about her statement.

"A naughty, naughty girl?" She asked, biting her lip to keep from laughing out loud. Amy closed her eyes in mortification, dragging her sister to a safer distance out of earshot.

"Stop it! This instant. Do you want to get me in trouble?" She asked seriously. Charlotte smiled, throwing her arm around her sister's shoulder.

"We wouldn't want that now...would we?"

Amy huffed in annoyance, but Charlotte calmed her down with a kiss to her forehead.

"Well, it's late. Are you both packed and ready for the off tomorrow?" Charlotte asked briskly. Amy nodded.

"Yes, we're packed. Thank you so much for allowing us to stay, Char. It…really helped." Amy said sincerely.

Charlotte smiled softly, her eyes tearing up.

"Yeah, I can see how much it helped. The man hasn't been able to keep his eyes off of you the entire week. I'd say good luck, but I don't think you'll need it at this point."

Amy snorted. "I'm a Scientist. I don't believe in luck." She said, trying to sound convincing. Charlotte didn't buy it.

"Well, I do. And I believe in Fate. Whatever brought the two of you together is working its magic, that's for certain. Just do me a favor…"

Amy quirked her brow.

"What's that?" Amy asked, curious.

"When you make me a bridesmaid, remember nothing too hideous. I don't want to wear anything like Cousin Irene had for her wedding party." Charlotte said, shivering at the memory.

Amy, on the other hand, shivered for an entirely different reason.

Marrying Sheldon Cooper…Dear Lord.

"Um…I promise," She stammered out, retreating to Sarah's room for some serious thinking.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

True to his word to Penny, Sheldon brought Amy back to Pasadena.

By the time they arrived home, after another layover in Dallas/Ft Worth, it was after dinnertime. They took a taxi home from the airport so they wouldn't disturb any of their friends.

Sheldon had called Leonard the day after they arrived in Boston, to let him know they were together and they were fine. Leonard didn't push him for details; he knew once they returned home Sheldon would fill him in when he was ready.

Sheldon asked him to let Penny know Amy sent her love, and they would be home shortly. He apologized for the hijacking of her phone, promising to pay for any charges incurred.

Without a word, they walked hand in hand into his apartment. Leonard and Penny were sitting side by side on the couch, leaving Sheldon's spot empty. The gesture touched him greatly. They turned to see the couple standing inside the doorway, Amy's face a mask of contentment and Sheldon looking as though he weighed 1000 LBS lighter. Leonard and Penny's eyes strayed to their clasped hands, and Penny grabbed her mouth in shock.

He did it, she marveled. He really did it. Leonard could only smile at this best friend, nodding solemnly. A look passed between them, and Sheldon knew…it was Leonard's way of saying he was proud of him.

"We're tired. I think we'll head to bed," Sheldon said to them, grasping Amy's hand tighter.

No teasing, no laughter, no awkward exchanges about Amy staying over ensued. Penny and Leonard rose from the couch, heading toward the door. They both knew this was something that would never tease Sheldon and Amy about ever again. They'd come so far, and their friends were going to ensure nothing jeopardized their closeness.

"We'll just leave you both to rest," Leonard said casually, taking Penny's hand in his own and leading her over to 4B.

Silently, they made their way to Sheldon's room, no hesitation and no regrets. He opened the door for her, guiding her inside and taking off her cardigan. She stared at him with drowsy eyes as he unbuttoned her blouse, removing it gently from her arms and off her body before doing the same with her tank top and bra. He went to his chest, unearthing that white t shirt she wore the first time she spent the night, and slipped it over her head tenderly. Kneeling down, Sheldon slid first one shoe and then another off, moving on to lower her skirt before taking her hand and leading her to his bed.

He picked up the letter he had dropped days earlier, his eyes meeting hers as he folded it up without a word. Amy knew what it was; the fact he had dropped it and went racing after her was testament that he loved her. She smiled at him warmly as he went to his top drawer in his chest and placed the letter inside carefully. He intended to keep that letter forever. He knew it was addressed to Amy…but it was _meant_ for him.

He removed his own shoes and top shirt, joining her on his bed and snuggling in close. He had longed for this for days; ever since she said goodbye to him in his room almost 14 days ago. Was it really that long ago, he thought with wonder…that she was in here before her trip?

Releasing a shaky breath, he banished those thoughts immediately. All that mattered now, was that she was back. Where she belonged, with him.

Sinking into Sheldon's bed, wrapped in his arms with her head on his chest, was heaven. It had nothing at all to do with sex, and everything in the world to do with intimacy. This…

This was what she wanted. There would be more soon, no doubt. But this elation coursing through her veins stemmed from the fact Dr. Sheldon Cooper loved her, wanted her beside him, and fought for her. She was asleep as soon as she closed her eyes. She dreamt of beaches, and sandcastles, and blue eyes.

She slept more peacefully and soundly then she ever had before.

A/N – I'd just like to say how much I appreciate your reading and taking this journey with me. There is a very important anniversary trip coming up. I hope you're all gearing up for what's about to happen. I know I am. xoxo

She met her sister's gaze helplessly.

"That's what I thought," Charlotte said with understanding.


	33. Chapter 33

~ Chapter 33~

A/N – I want to say thank you to each and every reader. As we've only a handful of chapters left, I feel I should point something out. When I began this story, I was clear it was a story about growth, evolution, and acceptance. I've taken these characters out of their comfort zones, time and again, while trying to keep them IC as much as possible. That being said, _being_ a story about growth, evolution, and acceptance to change, there has to be a tipping point. And here we are. Canon Sheldon and Amy _ARE_ changing, as evidenced by Season 8. To keep them stagnant, not moving forward, is unrealistic. I'm sorry if their direction now seems OOC but here, as in canon, they are in a constant state of flux. I hope you continue to enjoy MY take on where I wish our beloved couple should go. Thank you again for your support. If romance was your hope for Sheldon and Amy, you've reached the right destination. Buckle up.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Mark my words - This love will make you levitate. Like a bird, like a bird without a cage - But down to Earth - If you choose to walk away, don't walk away. It's in the palm of your hand now baby -It's a yes or no, no maybe - So just be sure before you give it all to me, All to me, give it all to me. So you want to play with magic? Boy, you should know what you're falling for - Baby do you dare to do this? Cause I'm coming at you like a dark horse. Are you ready for, ready for… a perfect storm, perfect storm. Cause once you're mine, once you're mine… there's no going back…." Katy Perry – Dark Horse

The days passed and life returned to some semblance of order. Sheldon and Amy had a long talk when they finally awoke the morning after arriving home, agreeing that from that point on, honesty was their top priority. By silent agreement, they knew the inevitable was going to happen. The beautiful thing was…neither was afraid.

They'd spent five years running around in circles, and they were both exhausted. Sheldon was eager to begin this new chapter of his life with Amy. Leonard and Penny were getting married soon, and after that…who knew? Sheldon came to terms with the fact that he wanted a full life with Amy. This arrangement they'd reached of dates a few times a week, scheduled kisses, and strict rules was becoming more and more of a hardship than a help. He wasn't ready to totally abandon the relationship agreement; some things _had_ to be kept sacred. Yet Sheldon was finding he was more willing than ever to…renegotiate the terms.

A year ago, pondering his living arrangements _without_ Leonard was unthinkable. It was clear to Sheldon that his attachment to his best friend was unhealthy. He loved Leonard, respected him, and would always be grateful for the role he played in his life. In many ways, he was closer to a brother to Sheldon than his own was. Every good thing that ever happened to Sheldon, Leonard was a part of. He owed his friend so much. But the day was coming when he would have to sever the cord that bound him to his friend as if he were his child. The same thing applied to Penny.

It was no wonder, how before Amy got sick, she voiced concern over how close her boyfriend was to his neighbor and friend. While their relationship was not romantic in the slightest, Sheldon could now understand Amy's feelings of inadequacy that Sheldon often went to Penny for problem solving. It grieved him to remember her sad face that night on the beach; the day before his entire world was turned upside down. They'd traveled a long, hard road together these last eight months. It led them both to a place that Sheldon knew was the right destination.

Amy had made arrangements to meet with Chancellor Simpson in person, to explain the circumstances of her failure to arrive in Paris. They had a web call with Dr. Fontaine in Paris, and Amy apologized profusely for her handling of the situation. They took the news rather well, considering. They apologized for the short notice after all, reasoning that putting her life on hold after only two days notice wasn't very plausible. She assured them of her deep flattery at having been asked in the first place.

She decided to throw herself into her work here at Caltech; there was really no reason her work could not garner her a Nobel nomination with what she was doing here in California. As any Scientist who loved their path, she knew it was about the breakthroughs, and not the accolades. If she won, she won. If not, life would surely go on. Walking into her lab on that first Monday morning back with a renewed sense of purpose, she set up her equipment and got down to business with gusto.

Sheldon, similarly, felt a newfound sense of purpose as well.

String Theory was an area he would always revere. However, he realized there were so many areas of Science that he had yet to explore. He could excel at any of them, if not all. Why limit himself to just one field of study? He was doing so well with Dark Matter, and he'd agreed to expand his research into Cosmology. Any one of these fields could reveal to him the mysteries he was searching for. And now that Alex was playing a bigger part in his research, he could relax, sit back, and enjoy his work again.

For so long, he clutched his work to his bosom like a scared child; anyone could snatch it away, take credit for it, or disprove it. His recent foray into sharing that paper Leonard proved that he also, as a Scientist, had to learn to keep an open mind.

What had happened to the myopic, frightened man who jumped on a train last spring because his favorite comic book shop burned down? He looked into the mirror one morning after his shower, hardly recognizing the face staring back at him.

His blue eyes, which were usually guarded, seemed brighter. Larger.

_Happier_.

His mouth which was heretofore set in a pensive grimace, actually held hints of laughter. Smiles. Mirth.

His body had changed, as well. He was eating more home cooked meals, less junk and fast food. He didn't look like a beanpole anymore, but a sturdy man who could hold his own. He had muscle definition now. _Abs_.

He felt different, too. Stronger, wiser. And calmer. Although he knew he suffered from OCD, he was trying to control it. Channel it. The panic which usually consumed him was diminishing as the days went by. He was trying not to let his fears control his life. They had held him prisoner long enough. He wanted to break free of those bonds, for Amy…and for himself. He wanted to enjoy his life. Truly enjoy it. Time was so short, as the events as of late had taught him.

Sheldon thought of his wonderful girlfriend, and how much she meant to him. He couldn't imagine a future where she wasn't beside him. A Universe that she wasn't a part of.

Suddenly, that psychic's words came flooding back to him like a tidal wave. Amy _was_ the key to his happiness, both emotionally and professionally. Why did he not see it? By simply 'giving in' to the relationship, as he had done, he found himself so happy. His newfound confidence opening up areas of his mind and heart that were stubbornly closed for so long. To see now how much of Science was left unexplored, and how any one of those avenues could be mutually beneficial for him and the field, left Sheldon full of anticipation.

He spent his days pondering a future he never allowed himself to envision, without arrogance. Achieving a Nobel Prize, tenure perhaps, and his ultimate goal one day…

Marrying Amy Farrah Fowler. Giving her his name.

Snapping himself out of his folly, Sheldon read the twentieth card, rolling his eyes in a dramatic fashion. These things were ridiculous.

Alright, so being _in love_ was a good thing. He'd established that. But why did Hallmark feel the need to hose the industry down with sugary syrup disguised in the form of meaningful words? He felt the unbearable urge to test his blood sugar just standing here.

Honestly…some of these phrases made no sense. Besides, it always bothered him that someone else wrote words that you may or may not have meant to say. He put the last overpriced card he read back in its appointed slot, clucking his tongue.

Nothing here epitomized his relationship with Amy. Nothing here spoke of the friendship, trust, solidarity, and hope he had with her. Nothing said I love you in quite the right way. He wanted to say something that was new and inventive. He was no poet, but surely there had to be _something_ out there worthy of what they shared.

Their four year anniversary was approaching in one week, and Sheldon wanted everything to be perfect for her. Well, as near to perfect as possible. He was a realist, not a hippy. Murphy's Law clearly stated that if something can go wrong, it will. But even as a man of Science, he chose to ignore that.

Murphy's Law could suck it.

This would be the first year he would make certain she had her romantic night. Nothing but the best for his Vixen, however cliché it would appear. He no longer cared. He was ready, and so was she. After the year of chaos they shared, he affirmed it was time he started living and stopped being afraid. He almost lost her. Not once, but twice.

While on that plane to New York, he had taken an inventory of his deepest desires. He meant what he told Amy when he found her in that airport bar. He never wanted to leave her side again. It had taken him 34 years to come to terms with the fact that he, Sheldon Cooper, was nothing more than a man.

Highly evolved maybe. Sharply intelligent, certainly. But flesh and blood, admittedly.

It was selfish and cruel to deny Amy and himself what he knew would be a fulfilling and wonderful experience. Not just of the mind, but of the body and the soul as well. Whereas before, that notion was first preposterous and then later, terrifying, it had now morphed into what he could only describe as greatly anticipated.

He had taken the first steps to ensure this would be a success. While he didn't want to add on any pressure, but let things happen naturally, he also wanted Amy to realize the depth of his feelings and commitment to her.

Amy had mentioned that she wanted to go to Disneyland with him, since she had only been there with the girls. Sheldon's eyes had lit up in utter delight at the prospect.

"Really? Are you sure?" He had questioned her, and when she beamed and said "Of course I'm sure," He knew what his course of action would be.

He booked a suite at the Disney Grand Californian Hotel and Spa for the weekend, complete with a couples massage. The thought of someone touching him other than Amy had momentarily made him balk. But he relented after he thought of the relaxing connotations the massage would bring. He would try, for her, to keep an open mind. The worst that could happen was if he hated it, he could quietly excuse himself and leave her to enjoy her massage alone. It was baby steps like this he needed to focus on.

He had purposely asked for one room, with a king size bed. He felt the strong desire to hold Amy, all night long. He had grown addicted to how her soft body molded against his harder one. Part of him felt guilty, assuming they would share a bed without her permission. But the other part knew Amy wouldn't mind. He knew_ he_ didn't mind. Just the thought of it stirred something primal inside of him.

He knew what she felt like now; the soft planes of her body. What she sounded like in the heat of passion. What she looked like, writhing in his arms, flushed and spent. Sheldon swallowed against a surprisingly dizzying sense of lust. It still amazed him that he not only felt the stirrings in his body, but in his heart as well. He loved her, painfully so. And that love manifested itself in the strangest of ways. He felt this…yearning…to be with her. Even staring at her gave him pleasure.

Yet for all they had shared, and he was satisfied with the pace they had set up until now…there was still that elusive part of each other that was hidden. A delicious morsel perched on a plate high up, out of reach. He _wanted_ to reach it; pluck it down and devour it. He wanted to shed that last layer of metaphorical shields, and experience the joys of making love to his girlfriend.

Making love….

The phrase tormented him. He wasn't used to using such tender words to describe what he, as a Scientist, had previously deemed _coitus_.

Cold. Clinical.

Yet he knew without a doubt, there would be _nothing_ clinical nor cold to what they would soon share. Sheldon closed his eyes, trying to control his erratic breathing at what simply imagining Amy in his bed did to him. He broke out in a cold sweat, his heart hammering against his ribs as he pictured her beautiful body, her sensuous hair, her soulful green eyes…

Yes. He was _so_ done.

And it wasn't just what he would be getting out of it. For as much as he tried to deny it, watching Amy in pleasure was very arousing for him. Knowing it was_ him_ delivering her to such heights. The few times they had shared intimacy, it only left him chomping at the bit for more. He felt like he had traveled to an alternate Universe, stepped outside of his body, and was looking back at a Sheldon Cooper that was alien to him. Suddenly, the need to romance Amy became almost…_desperate_.

He wanted to wine and dine Amy, dance with her, bathe her in a tub of bubbles, and…

Sheldon cleared his throat, lost in sensations he could no longer put at bay. He wanted her. It was as simple and as difficult as that. Wanting her in the middle of a Walgreens though…probably not the smartest course of action he could come up with.

Sheldon looked around the card aisle, worried another shopper would see his…dilemma.

Good Lord. Now even thinking about her brought on these…responses. Discreetly covering his body with his messenger bag, he gave one last, annoying look to the cards. These will never do. He will have to figure something else out.

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"All packed and ready to go?" Leonard asked, not looking up from his laptop. Sheldon nodded, even though Leonard couldn't see it.

"Yes, all done. We can leave whenever you are ready," He said, sitting in his spot and staring straight ahead. The pensive tone in his voice had Leonard turning to face him.

"Hey, Sheldon. Are you worried about the weekend? Because you shouldn't be. Everything will be great. Trust me. Just relax and let things progress naturally."

Sheldon began to wring his hands together.

"I'm trying not to worry. I know Amy and I love each other, and if things take their natural course, so be it. I suppose I'm just worried we are rushing things."

Leonard abandoned his laptop, and came to sit in his chair next to Sheldon.

"Well…I think only you both can know if you are rushing things. From the outside looking in, though…four years is a pretty good starting point. If you feel the need to wait longer, than that is alright, too. It's not a race, Sheldon. I know Howard, Raj, and even I on occasion have teased you over the years, but in reality? I envy you in many ways."

The heartfelt tone in Leonard's voice had Sheldon turning in his seat to face him completely. He was baffled by Leonard's words.

"Envy _me_? But why… I have no experience in this situation, and you have plenty. For all of your lovable quirks, Leonard, at least you know how to interact with women. I feel like a teenager. It's nothing to be envious about, trust me." He said, shyness coloring his tone.

Leonard smiled, nonplussed.

"What I envy, Sheldon, is that even though you waited to share this with a woman out of some Homo Novus delusion, you still get to experience it with your first love. That is something you can never replicate. I don't know if you understand how rare and special that is.

Sheldon pondered this, the fact he and Amy were both indeed virgins coming to the forefront of his mind. A year ago, even considering this would have sent him running in the other direction, screaming at the top of his lungs, or throwing himself into a heap on the floor crying. He frowned at how irritatingly juvenile he had been. And he felt profound guilt over keeping Amy in some strange limbo. She had been incredibly patient with him. She must _truly _love him.

"Yes…I can see how that would be a fulfilling thought, mating with your first love," He admitted to Leonard, suddenly feeling a need to see Amy's face. He attempted a wide smile, and Leonard shook his head. He knew his innocent friend had much growing to still do, but this was the closest he'd been to maturity in ten years. Whatever spell Amy had cast upon him had worked. It was different, seeing Sheldon so…happy. Unnerving, as well.

Things were changing around here, for sure. The thought made Leonard a little sad. Even though he and Penny were getting married, and it looked like Sheldon and Amy were headed on that same path, he missed the days it was just the guys. He never told Sheldon how lucky he was that he took that apartment offer. He had driven him crazy over the last ten years, but in retrospect…Leonard wouldn't have changed a thing.

He met Sheldon's expectant stare, smiling a smile of male pride at his friend.

"Can I ask you something, Sheldon?" Leonard asked his friend, not sure how to broach the topic he wanted to discuss. Sheldon's open face made him feel a tad better, though.

"Of course."

Leonard blew out air through his lips.

"You don't feel like you _have_ to do this, do you? Amy loves you no matter what. You know that, right?"

Sheldon nodded thoughtfully at his friend.

"Yes, Leonard. I know that. I don't feel pressured into doing anything with Amy. Not anymore. If the last year has taught me anything, it's that I've been hiding. From myself, and from Amy. Whatever happens from this point on, I want it to be what _I_ want. Not what I'm forced to do out of fear."

The conviction in his voice touched Leonard.

"That's good, Sheldon. I'm very proud of you."

Sheldon bowed his head in silent thanks. Leonard got up, grabbing his keys from the bowl.

"Come on, buddy. Time to make you a man."

Sheldon stood up, grabbing the handle of his carry on.

"I'm already a man, Leonard. I don't understand your meaning."

Leonard winced, slipping on his jacket. Sheldon _had_ grown, but there were still area's that needed work. Leonard chuckled.

"Um…I'll explain on the way." He said, and Sheldon shook his head all the way out the door.

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The drive to Anaheim wasn't awkward at all. Sheldon and Amy played a variety of games, such as I Spy and The Alphabet game. He loved to hear her laugh, and determined it was his first favorite sound.

Disneyland was only an hour away, so they made it there quickly. Parking in the lot of the grand hotel, Amy's eyes widened dramatically.

"_This_ is where we'll be staying?" She asked, her heart giving a jolt when Sheldon nodded and fixed her with a warm stare.

"It is, little lady. I hope you like it," He whispered, and Amy lost her breath.

This wasn't a motel, or even a hotel. It was a _resort_, and a very posh one at that. The idea that Sheldon spent this much money on her touched her greatly.

Popping her trunk, she jogged to the back to help retrieve their bags but Sheldon beat her. He pulled out both cases, only allowing Amy to grab her beauty bag and their finery, which was hanging in a garment bag. They walked into the lobby, and Amy felt dizzy.

This was _really_ happening. A romantic weekend, to celebrate their anniversary, no less. She looked up at the multileveled interior of the hotel, marveling at its beauty and rustic charm. Sheldon left her to there to enjoy the scenery as he checked them in briskly. Returning to her, he leaned in to whisper in her ear and she startled as his warm breath tickled her neck.

"Does this meet with the lady's approval?" He asked, and Amy turned to meet his smoldering gaze.

_Oh, my…_

"It's beautiful, Sheldon. I don't know what to say," She admitted, feeling flushed when Sheldon grinned slyly. Giving her boyfriend 'The Keys to the Kingdom' was a dangerous thing. Confident Sheldon was dangerous Sheldon. Deliciously so.

"So…what is on the agenda for the weekend, Dr. Cooper?" She asked expectantly.

Sheldon adored when Amy used his title like that. A fact she knew very well, the little Vixen. She simply gave him an innocent smile when he glared down at her in hot admonition.

He guided her toward the bank of elevators, taking her carry on along with his.

"Well, as tomorrow is our actual anniversary, I thought we would spend the day at Disneyland then. Tonight, we have reservations at The Sky Room in Long Beach. And then I was hoping you would like to go dancing afterwards."

Amy stopped walking and looked at Sheldon in shock. He stopped at well, pressing the button for the third floor and meeting her gaze.

"Dancing?" She repeated, her voice barely there. Sheldon wanted to dance with her, willingly? Without a wedding or alcohol impairing his judgement?

Sheldon nodded, leading her inside the elevator car with his hand on her shoulder.

"Yes, dancing. I know you enjoy it. And to be honest, I do as well. With you," He hastened to add, earning a beaming smile from her. The thought of him holding her close on the dance floor made her stomach somersault and her blood zing.

"That sounds lovely, Sheldon. Thank you. Where would you like to go dancing? Any particular style of music?"

Sheldon smiled as he watched the floor numbers ascend.

"Yes, actually. I booked us a table at Harvelle's in Long Beach. It is a jazz club. They have a wonderful saxophonist playing tonight and I thought you would enjoy that.

Amy blushed.

_Jazz?_

That was sexy as hell. Sheldon wanted to dance with her to slow jazz. Her breathing began to quicken as the implications of that sank in. Just then, the elevator dinged, and Sheldon ushered her ahead of him out toward their room. They walked side by side, and when they arrived at room 340 Sheldon stopped and faced her, taking her hands in his gently. Amy raised her brows, wondering what the matter was.

"Amy…I hope I wasn't being presumptuous when I asked for one room. I assumed it would meet with your approval. But if you'd rather have your own-…"

Amy put her finger on his lips to stop his rant. He was silenced at once, staring at her in a way that made all of the blood leave her head. Sheldon's eyes of their own accord lowered drowsily as they gazed into hers. Oh, boy…if she survived this weekend without combusting, it would be a miracle.

"One room is fine, Sheldon. In fact… it's perfect. Now stop worrying and let me in." She scolded, a smile in her voice.

Sheldon stuck the keycard in the door, opening it with flourish.

"After you, milady," He said with Southern charm, ushering her inside.

The room was magnificent. Panoramic views afforded them a lovely view of Disneyland. Amy walked over to the window, loving the fact she could see the entire park in the distance. There was a balcony outside with comfy looking chairs overlooking the property.

Peeking her head inside the bedroom, her breath caught. It was quite simply gorgeous. There was a plush sofa off to the side, with a coffee table that held the largest bouquet of flowers she had ever seen.

"Wow! This resort spares no expense to impress its guests," She said happily, bouncing over to sniff the flowers. There was every color rose known to man in the bouquet, the sweet fragrance filling her nostrils and making her dizzy. Sheldon walked over to her slowly, a slow smile spreading on his lips.

"Hmmm…there is even a card. What does it say?" He asked casually, standing before her with his hands clasped together. Amy furrowed her brows as she plucked the card from the stem, looking at Sheldon in confusion.

Seconds bled into moments as Amy stared at the words, her eyes slowly watering as she took them in. Her eyes scanned the card once, twice, three times, before the tears began to trek down her face. All the while, Sheldon watched her, feeling his heart swell within his chest cavity.

"You…you did this? These are for me?" She asked in shock, her eyes turning once again to the lovely bouquet.

"Yes. These are for you. I couldn't bring them with me today, and I wanted you to enjoy them this weekend. If you want to bring them home Sunday then we can take them in your car - …"

Amy dropped the card, launching herself into Sheldon's arms and catapulting him backward. They stumbled, landing together on the sofa, and she covered his face with kisses.

"Alright, alright…Good Lord," He chided, his eyes sliding closed as she nibbled on his chin.

"Thank you, thank you so much Sheldon. They are absolutely beautiful." She gushed, her tears wetting his neck. He found that so endearing.

"You're welcome Amy," He whispered, and she broke away to stare at the man she loved so much.

"Sheldon… This is just amazing. I can't even…" She trailed off, words failing her. Sheldon smiled warmly at his girlfriend. If she was amazed now…

"So…I've ordered a car to collect us tonight. I don't want you worrying about having a drink or two. Besides…I want your attention focused elsewhere."

Amy felt a tremor in her stomach as she let his words sink in.

"Oh?" She questioned, licking her suddenly dry lips. Sheldon smiled lazily at her.

"Yes. Tonight is all about you, Amy. I want you to enjoy yourself."

Amy could not believe this was Sheldon Cooper. He had changed so much in the last year. Shaking her head, she gazed at him, admiring the way his blue eyes sparkled at her.

"Why are you doing this?" She asked him sincerely, her tears glistening in her eyes. Sheldon reached up, wiping them away.

"Because…you deserve it. I need to make up for every time I've ever let you down." He said tenderly.

Amy's heart ached at how much he was trying.

"Just…be yourself." She whispered sweetly. "That's all I ask."

Sheldon gulped at how perfect she was, and how she made him feel.

"I can do that," He whispered, kissing her forehead tenderly.

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Amy took a long bubble bath while Sheldon checked his email. She wanted to look extra special for him tonight, so she had enlisted Penny's help in finding the perfect outfit. It was a 50's inspired empire waist black cocktail dress, which was much shorter than anything she had ever worn around Sheldon. It skirted her mid- thigh, and had a modestly low cut v neck which showed off her cleavage nicely. Nothing overdone, but the effect was stunning when paired with the black patent stilettos Penny loaned her.

She usually wore her long hair down, but decided with the dress it was nicer up. She gathered it high on her head, securing it with pins and prayer. A little makeup and she was ready to go. She stared at herself in the bathroom mirror, feeling butterflies break loose in her stomach. She had spent the last twenty minutes trying to put in her contacts, finally deciding that she liked herself with her glasses, and so did Sheldon. Throwing the disposables back in her bag, she looked at herself in the mirror.

'_Woman up, Fowler. You can do this. It's just Sheldon,' _She told herself.

The trouble was, _just_ Sheldon was acting more and more amorous toward her since he came for her and brought her back from New York. _Just_ Sheldon was short circuiting her brain with his increased touching, kissing, and flirting. _Just_ Sheldon was out there waiting for her, ready to shower her with romance.

She knew how to handle Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper, PhD. But _this_ Sheldon? She had no idea.

Tentatively, she stepped out of the bathroom.

Sheldon was sitting with his back to her at the data port. He sat with his perfect posture, tapping away at the laptop. She took a moment to admire him from the back.

He had let his hair grow out a little, and his style lately reminded her of when they first started dating.

To her surprise, he was dressed in what appeared to be a suit. Navy dress pants, a vest which fit him snugly, and a dress shirt in a pale lavender color. He had dressed up for her, to take her to dinner and for dancing. She felt the burning of tears coming on, but suppressed them. He was doing this for her. Not that she minded his superhero shirts and casual khaki's; but he knew how special this weekend was for her, and he was making a concerted effort to dress the part of her gentleman. For that, she loved him all the more. She would never change a thing about him. If he wanted to try new things, she would support him.

Sheldon's Vulcan hearing detected movement behind him, and he slowly swiveled around in the chair. The sight that greeted him stole his breath.

She was a vision. There were no words he could use to describe how perfect she looked. But he'd try. Sexy, demure, sweet, and breathtaking were a few. The perfect mixture of temptress and innocent. Standing up, he made his way over to her slowly, allowing her to take in his attire as well.

From the back, he looked wonderful. From the front…he looked good enough to eat. Amy particularly enjoyed the way his trousers snugly fit his strong thighs, and the vest showcased his broad chest. Good Lord…who _was_ this man? His blue eyes traveled the length of her, stopping on her bare legs for numerous seconds before sliding back up. When he reached her eyes, she felt her entire body quiver at the look he gave her.

"Are you trying to _kill_ me, Dr. Fowler," He murmured, taking her hand and playfully twirling her around so he could see her from every angle. He had never seen her dressed so, not even for her cousins wedding. That was a gorgeous gown, but it did not showcase her amazing legs. He looked down at them again, his heart rate increasing at just _how_ much leg was on display. And quite a bit of thigh, as well.

Sheldon took a deep breath.

"Amy…you are beautiful. Do you know that?" He asked, his voice soft and sincere. Amy swallowed, closing her eyes.

"Thank you, Sheldon." She managed, chewing her lip. "You look so handsome. _More _than handsome," She whispered. And unlike Prom, the compliment didn't send him into the throes of a panic attack. Quite the opposite.

"Shall we?" He asked, taking her arm and leading her towards the door. "Our car should be waiting."

Amy followed him, grabbing her purse on the way out.

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The Sky Room Restaurant, situated atop the famed Breaker's Hotel in Long Beach, had long been considered one of the city's most romantic. It awarded the diner gorgeous views of the city, and exceptional food. Sheldon felt like a king walking into the establishment with Amy on his arm. He led her to the entrance, where a maître d greeted them warmly.

"Welcome to The Sky Room. Are you joining us to celebrate a special occasion this evening?" The man asked professionally. Sheldon nodded, his grip on Amy's hand tightening.

"Yes, we are celebrating an anniversary." He said proudly, turning to give Amy a warm smile. Amy damn nearly swooned. "We have a reservation for Cooper." Sheldon said, and after checking his book the man led the couple to their table.

It was an intimate table for two overlooking the city. Amy smiled widely as the maître d held out her chair for her to sit, and Sheldon waited until she was seated before sitting down himself.

"Would you care to see the wine list this evening?" The man asked politely, and Amy raised her brows to Sheldon.

"No, thank you. I'd like to order a bottle of Champagne. Dom Perignon, vintage year 2004," He said confidently. The man nodded, impressed.

"Excellent vintage. I will tell your waiter," He said, briskly walking away.

Amy's eyes widened at not only the fact Sheldon ordered a bottle of very expensive champagne, but that he obviously knew a good vintage.

"Sheldon…Dom Perignon is quite pricey. Are you sure-"

Sheldon leaned forward, his face very close to Amy's.

"Yes, Dr. Fowler. I'm very sure. I want to spoil you tonight. Please, let me. Alright?" He asked earnestly, and Amy was helpless to deny him.

"Alright," She croaked, clearing her throat.

Their waiter arrived with their champagne, greeting them kindly and explaining the specials. Sheldon found he couldn't focus on anything other than Amy; the way her hair was pulled back and sat upon her head precariously sexy. Or how her earrings glimmered in her delicate lobes. Or how her green eyes popped magnificently in the candlelight.

They watched each other, each lost in thought and secretly thinking the same thing.

The waiter poured them each a glass of the perfect libation, and Sheldon raised his glass to Amy.

"A toast to you, Amy. Happy Anniversary."

"Cheers," She whispered, clinking glasses with her boyfriend.

Sheldon took a sip of the drink, expecting to hate it. He was pleasantly shocked as the bubbling delicacy trickled down his throat enticingly.

"Yum…that was delicious," He murmured, his eyes widening in pleasure.

Amy bit her lip as she took in his handsome face, so happy.

Over dinner, the pair chatted and talked about work, their group of friends, and their trip to see Charlotte and Joe.

"I had a better time than I thought I would, considering the circumstances," Sheldon said quietly. Amy nodded.

"I love my Sister. And Joe is wonderful. Being there with the kids wasn't so bad either. I hope one day to achieve what they have," She said wistfully.

Normally, Amy never allowed herself to voice her desires of a future with Sheldon that she wasn't certain he wanted. After last spring, though…she knew exactly what she wanted. And with whom.

Sheldon narrowed his blue eyes at her, trying to decipher her meaning. When it finally struck him, he opened his mouth and bit his lip slowly.

"Maybe…Maybe you might even achieve something even _greater _than Charlotte." He said, his voice strong and promising.

Amy cocked her head to study him. Maybe it was the champagne talking, or the fact that it was clear each of them wanted to be alone with the other. The sexual tension had been building ever since that night on Charlotte's couch, and they were nearing critical mass.

Sheldon's eyes lowered to Amy's modest cleavage, loving the way the soft curves were peeking out of her dress demurely.

"So much greater," He said again, this time with an air of finality. Amy nearly fell over as his eyes slid up to hers, stealing her breath.

Dear God…what was he _doing _to her? She knew she was in trouble, but she had no idea just _how_ much trouble.

"Maybe." Amy agreed, taking a long sip of her champagne.

Sheldon didn't break eye contact with her the whole time, and Amy was growing lightheaded from the combination of the alcohol and the lust that had settled in her belly like mist.

Had Sheldon ever realized how much his long, lingering stares in her direction turned her heart inside out? Somewhere, buried deeply inside this man that lived most of his life without emotional ties was a deeply passionate spirit. She knew it; had glimpsed it on more than one occasion. He may not have been perfect, but neither was she.

As they continued to chat, a thought occurred to her that she had never imagined before. She wondered if younger Sheldon had ever dreamt of something more than the path he ultimately set for himself. And she wondered how different his life would have been if he had.

"Sheldon…may I ask you a question?"

"Of course," He answered gently.

"Do you enjoy being a Physicist?"

Sheldon was taken aback at Amy's strange inquiry. He narrowed his brows, a little crease of confusion forming between them.

"Enjoy Physics? Well…It's my life's work." He answered, his tone flat.

Amy nodded, taking another sip of her champagne.

"Yes, I know. But do you _enjoy_ it? Because over the last few years, I've seen you struggle with it. I myself love Neurobiology. It truly enjoy it. It isn't just a career to me, or a burden. I'm curious as to how you view Physics."

Sheldon blinked slowly, trying to organize his thoughts.

_View Physics?_ His entire world _was_ Physics. He'd never thought about doing anything else.

"I suppose…yes. I do enjoy it. It was all I thought about as a child. I began to solve equations as a toddler. I've never known anything different," He said defensively, yet with no ire.

Amy nodded thoughtfully.

"Did you ever want to do something else? Like be a Doctor?"

Sheldon smirked at her.

"I _am_ a Doctor, Amy." He said, his voice holding that hint of derision she loved so much. Amy giggled, rolling her eyes.

"A _medical_ Dr. Sheldon. A surgeon. Or perhaps, an attorney like Joe? With your memory, you could have been anything."

Sheldon sat back, considering Amy's words. He had never thought about it. Not once. He just assumed Physics was his lifelong goal. For as long as he could remember, the Universe and mathematics were everything.

"I guess…as a young boy I wanted to be a train conductor. But that was only for the glamour of it," He said brightly, making Amy smile at his boyish reasoning. Trains and glamour weren't in the same lexicon as far as Amy could tell.

He bit his lip, staring at her strangely.

"Why do you ask?" He wondered curiously. Amy merely shrugged.

"I suppose…I was reflecting with your intelligence, that you had so many opportunities. I think what you're doing is wonderful, don't get me wrong. And truthfully? I couldn't picture you as anything other than a Scientist. I just wondered if anything else ever struck your fancy."

Sheldon gaped at her in silence. She always threw him for a loop, making him think. Making him _feel_.

"You bring up a valid point, Amy. But I would have to say, in retrospect… I never chose the field of Physics. I suppose…it chose _me_." He said, a hint of incredulity in his voice.

Amy smiled at her boyfriend gently.

"I guess fate chooses our path for us. Maybe we have no say in the matter. It's a mystery." She said enigmatically. Sheldon could only stare at her, speechless.

He didn't believe in fate. He fought against such hokum his whole life. _He_ made his own destiny, nobody else.

Why then, did he suddenly feel like he had absolutely no say in the matter whatsoever?

Just then, the waiter came by with the dessert menu, interrupting them.

"Would you both care for dessert this evening, Sir?"

Amy and Sheldon looked at him before focusing back on each other.

"The chocolate tart, please," They said in unison, causing the waiter to chuckle.

"With two forks," Sheldon threw in, winking at Amy.

"The chocolate tart it is, then." The man said kindly. He didn't wait to see the couple give each other matching shy glances, or how the gentleman licked his lips in anticipation.

Of more than just the tart.

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The couple spent the thirty minute drive to Harvelle's sitting in the back seat of the Town Car in silence. Each was lost in their own separate thoughts as to where the night ahead was going to lead. The lights of Long Beach glittered in the distance, and as they neared the harbor, The Queen Mary sat majestically amongst the city skyline.

Sheldon looked over at Amy from the corner of his eye, admiring the way the tendrils of her hair fell down to her pale shoulders.

She looked so lovely tonight; so much like the Amy he knew, yet different. There was a glow about her that he hadn't noticed before. He hoped more than anything that he was responsible for putting that glow on her face. He found he wanted to be the reason for her happiness, every day.

'_Good Lord…what's to become of me,' _He thought.

_Just do as Leonard said; remain calm. Be calm. No pressure. No pressure…_

"Did you enjoy dinner?" He asked softly, breaking Amy out of her distracted thoughts. She turned to him, smiling sweetly.

"I did. Very much so. Thank you, Sheldon. And you? Was dinner to your satisfaction?"

Sheldon tilted his face as he considered.

"Yes. It was. But I think…" He trailed off, Amy staring at him in anticipation.

"You think?" She questioned, her voice lowering. Sheldon slid closer to her, his eyes drifting to her lips. Amy's breath held suspended in her lungs as he moved into her personal space.

"I think I need to make sure that chocolate tart was as good as I thought it was." He said quietly. Amy swallowed noisily.

"Oh? And…how do you propose to do that?" She asked in a small voice, already anticipating what was coming.

Sheldon didn't disappoint. Reaching his hand up, he cupped her face gently, effectively pulling her closer.

"A litmus test," He whispered, pressing his lips to hers slowly.

Amy's eyes slipped shut as Sheldon opened his mouth, his softer than silk lips pressing inside her own. God…he tasted delicious, Amy thought dreamily, the combination of Sheldon and chocolate invading her senses.

Sheldon had never before desired such closeness with another human being. The way she melted against him, her sweet mouth so pure and gentle, made him feel like crying.

_What's happening to me?_ His hazy mind questioned.

"Mmm…" Sheldon hummed, breaking away to run his nose along Amy's throat. She smelled fantastic tonight. How was it she always smelled like flowers?

"You smell wonderful, Amy. What is that scent?" He whispered, his lips moving against Amy's throat and making her shiver.

"Freesia. It's…a bath bomb I used. From Lush," She whispered in return, her hand reaching up to cradle Sheldon's jaw.

"Do you have another one of those lying around?" He asked her, his voice sounding like whiskey soaked kindling. What was it about his Texas accent that made Amy tremble? She blinked at him like an owl.

"I…um. I have another kind. Vanilla." She murmured, her heart skipping a beat as Sheldon ran his tongue along his bottom lip.

"Vanilla…my favorite." He said, looking at her as though _she_ were a chocolate tart.

_Dear God…_

She was about to pull Sheldon's face back to hers, when the driver alerted them to their arrival.

"Harvelle's, Sir."

Sheldon and Amy both smiled at each other, pulling back.

"We've arrived," Amy repeated, her eyes looking out the window. She was flushed and panting, and knew full well her ears were red.

Sheldon pursed his lips, looking out the window.

"So it would seem." He said, taking her hand and pulling her out of the car behind him.

Harvelle's was considered one of the coolest jazz clubs in town. A throwback to the speakeasy's of old, it was charming and sultry.

Sheldon and Amy listened to song after song, the driving beat of the music putting them further and further in a relaxed mood. Sheldon ordered a mineral water for himself and a Frangelico for Amy. He felt like he needed some liquid courage, but he refrained.

Tonight, Sheldon wanted to be in control of his faculties. He wanted to remember everything.

"Would you like to dance now?" Sheldon asked, standing up and holding out his hand for Amy to take. She smiled as she looked at it, rising to join him as he led her the dancefloor.

"You must let me lead this dance, Amy. Just follow my steps." He whispered in her ear, causing her heart to jolt in her chest.

"Okay, Sheldon." She promised.

Where normally when they danced, he took her hands and put them on the appropriate places; i.e. his upper back, or his bicep, that wasn't the case here.

His hands slid down to the small of her back, gathering her close. She could feel him so close to her, the front of him fused to the front of her.

"Now you do the same. Put your arms around my waist," He said, stepping even closer to allow her arms to encircle his taller waist.

The feel of his tall, hard body pressed against her made her lightheaded. She looked up at him the same time he looked down at her, and they both felt it.

The artist began to play another song, a sexy instrumental version of Ain't No Sunshine When She's Gone by Bill Withers. They swayed together, eyes never breaking.

And danced three more before the night was over.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Hours later, Sheldon paid the driver and gave him a generous tip. It was past midnight, and most of the resort was asleep. They stepped onto the elevator in silence. When the doors clicked shut, Sheldon backed up against the wall, his eyes fixed upon Amy's. Amy in turn stared at him. The doors opened suddenly on the second floor, a group of people getting on and filling the space between them.

It didn't matter. They could have been in a crowd of a thousand, and it wouldn't have changed the chemistry flowing between them; the electricity. When the doors opened to their floor, they stepped out and Sheldon guided her forward by placing his palm on the small of her back. The very same spot he had caressed all night. Right above her beautiful posterior, which bled into the most amazing beckoning hips he'd ever laid eyes upon.

Pulling out the room keycard from his top pocket, he pushed the door open for her to enter. But Amy had other ideas.

Turning abruptly, Amy grabbed Sheldon by the lapels of his vest, and raised herself on tiptoe to kiss him softly.

He stood still while her mouth moved over his, his blood boiling and his mind going completely blank. When she pulled back, she noted his lips were red from her slight lipstick. She smiled widely, shaking her head. Sheldon stared at her in a daze.

"What…are you smiling about?" He asked quietly, his head following hers as she leaned in close to his ear.

"I've been dying to do that all night." She admitted, and Sheldon gave up the fight.

Reaching forward, he engulfed her in his arms completely.

They barely made it through the door of the room before they attacked each other. Sheldon turned her around, pinning her against the wall and kissing her hungrily. Emotions and longings that were building for months, years…came pouring out in a torrent.

Amy in turn nuzzled his ear, taking the lobe into her mouth and biting gently. Sheldon moaned as she drew her lips and teeth down his neck.

He took her thigh and brought it up around his waist, enjoying her smooth skin. He ran his fingers from her knee to her inner thigh, feeling himself unravelling at her breathy moans. She reached down and around, trying to pull his shirt from his trouser pants, when she hazily remembered his vest was in the way. He pulled back a bit, his eyes dilated as he looked at her.

Amy took the opportunity to unbutton the buttons to the vest, drawing it down his arms slowly. His mouth fell open as she began to follow suit with his shirt. She only reached the third button on his shirt when he couldn't wait for another kiss, so he dragged her close to him, devouring her mouth again. Her lips and tongue tasted sweet, of the cordial she'd drunk at the club. She was delicious.

"Is this alright?" She whispered against his mouth, knowing if they were to stop, it had to be now.

Sheldon pulled back, his eyes full of love and his heart near ready to burst from his chest.

"Yes, Amy. It's _more_ than alright." He murmured gently.

He loved her so much, had waited for her and she for him. He didn't know what he was doing, but he reasoned to let instinct guide him. Whatever they shared, it would be wonderful. Because it was _them_. He was finally at that place where he felt he could express physically how much Amy meant to him; show her that she _was_ beautiful, desired, and cherished.

He wanted to build her passion. He knew it was a silly romantic notion, but he wanted their first time to be on their anniversary, tomorrow night. Tonight he would give her a taste of what was to come. He lowered her to the plush carpet, his eyes roaming over her in appreciation. Her lovely dress was hiked up around her hips, and her long hair was disheveled. She looked like a goddess.

He drew his hand up her leg, until he reached her panties. Amy panted as she watched him deliberate, wanting to just rip the damn things off herself. His eyes glittered in the dim light as he watched her.

"May I?" He whispered, to which Amy bit her lip and shook her head rapidly. He grew even more excited at the fact she was so impatient.

A naughty thought entered his mind, and rather than slip the garment off, he slipped his fingers inside, loving the way his big hand disappeared beneath the black lace. It looked so erotic.

"God…Sheldon."

Amy cried out as he found her wet and ready. That would never fail to amaze him, that he had such an effect on her. Sheldon closed his eyes at the incredible feeling of her – warm, wet, and giving.

"You have to be the most sensuous creature on this Earth," Sheldon whispered, reaching up his free hand to stroke her breast. The v neck of her dress afforded him perfect access and he slid his warm hand inside, cupping the flesh tenderly. How she never saw herself before as alluring was beyond him. Cardigans or gowns, she was Amy. Pure, gorgeous, and perfect.

Amy gasped as he rubbed her clitoris gently, sliding first one and then another finger into her snug passage. He had only one experience of doing this to her, and was careful not to hurt her.

Moaning, Amy threw her head back into the carpet. He watched the passion cross her face, taking in every nuance of her as she rode his fingers and panted softly. He swallowed thickly, his eyes growing wide as she reached up and with her own hand rubbed her other breast through her bra. Lord…that was sexy. He'd never seen her look so out of control with want and it nearly made him pass out at how his adrenaline spiked.

"Amy…" He rasped, rubbing her faster and leaning in to kiss her neck, her throat…anywhere he could reach without breaking their connection. "I want to make you lose control," He admitted, his voice raspy as he tried not to come at the image her touching herself evoked. "Give me control."

Amy's entire body broke out in goosebumps. Didn't he know he controlled her, already?

"God…yes," She moaned, her body undulating slowly under his tender assault.

He could not believe they were the same people who met in that coffee shop four years ago. They were timid and clueless then. When he thought of how far they'd come since, he wanted to weep. It was her. It was _all_ because of her. She had changed him into a man, from a selfish overgrown boy. With her patience, love, and intelligence. He owed her his very life. He owed her everything. He'd be lost without her now.

Leaning down, he ran his lips across hers to wet them, before suctioning his mouth to hers.

"Sheldon …please don't stop," She cried, biting his lip and making him growl. He wouldn't stop now, even if a 7.0 earthquake hit them.

Reaching down, Amy stealthily unzipped Sheldon's trousers, her trembling hand finding his hardness with ease.

"Oh, yes…Touch me, Amy," He rasped, pushing himself into her hand further as his own ministrations sped up. He was so hard now and getting harder by the moment; his manhood filled her small hand, and he wanted to have her wrap her fingers around him. But there was something better, something that would be more fulfilling for them both that he wanted to try. He gathered his courage, knowing he wanted this more than anything.

Suddenly, maddeningly…he pulled away, picking her up and righting her to her feet. He led her into the bedroom, pulling the dress over her head swiftly. He left her bra and panties on, before yanking off his shoes and pants.

Sheldon lowered down to the bed, sitting on the edge, and pulled Amy on top to straddle him. Her heels were still on her feet. He reached down to remove the shoes, draping her legs alongside each of his. The action opened her up to him completely.

Amy moaned as she felt his thick erection cradled between her legs, hitting her sensitive flesh _just so_ through the fabric. Sheldon reached around and steadied her hips, the feeling of his warm, large hands making her tremble. He slid his hands down inside her panties, cupping her bottom and pressing her tightly against him. Sheldon threw his head back, overcome with pleasure.

"Oh, Einstein…the way she _feels_," Sheldon mumbled, more to himself than to Amy. The reality of her, so warm and close, was torture. He slid against her again, deeper this time, his eyes bulging as the length of his manhood slid lower and pressed between them. He whimpered loudly, his legs shaking as they gazed at one another. Another pass, deeper still…and he was nestled as close as he could get, their undergarments the only thing preventing full penetration. Her wetness seeped through to him, driving him nearly insane.

"Oh, Sheldon. Oh," She keened, trying to hold on to him. She felt dizzy and hot, certain she was going to faint from pleasure.

"Good…grief…" Sheldon yelped, helpless as every cell and nerve ending in his body was strung tight as a bowstring. "Amy…beautiful Amy," He whispered, closing his eyes.

Amy experimentally moved, sliding herself over the bulge in his boxers enticingly. He wanted to abandon his thoughts of moments ago, of waiting until tomorrow...and simply ravish her. Rip the lace from her body and plunge into her. He had to wait though. One more day. Just one…

But as her body caressed his own, this primal dance threatening to incinerate him, he feared he was becoming unglued. He lowered his eyes to where they were pressed together, transfixed. A fleeting thought entered his mind unbidden, of silly words he hadn't had the intelligence to comprehend.

'_When I'm with Amy and our bathing suit areas mush together, boy howdy is it magic.'_

Fool he was. What an utter fool. _Nothing_ could prepare him for just _how_ magical it would feel.

Amy began to caress his chest, rubbing her hands up and down from his pecs to his abs. Sheldon's stomach quivered as she unbuttoned his shirt. Sheldon helped her remove it by sitting back a fraction. A white short sleeved undershirt remained, soft and pristine. Her mouth grew dry as she noticed his masculine nipples poking through the cotton.

"Can I…may I remove this shirt too?" She whispered, a tremor in her voice. She trembled when Sheldon nodded. He sat back, helping her dispatch of the garment before pressing back against her again. Reaching around, he unclipped Amy's bra, freeing her breasts to his hungry gaze. Her nipples were hard and swollen, so ready for his attention.

They stared at each other, spellbound by what they were on the verge of doing. Sheldon's fingers trailed back to her panties. He bunched up the material in his hands gently, sliding his fingers purposefully against her. Amy ground down upon him harshly, rubbing her nipples against his chest.

"You little…Vixen," Sheldon moaned, closing his eyes as he lowered his mouth and took a hard peak inside.

"Mmmm…" Amy moaned in reply, the combination of his hardness and his fingers pressing against her sensitive nub proving to be unbearable.

"Dear Lord," He forced out as Amy tentatively rocked her hips, grinding against his cotton covered manhood. They watched each other, enraptured, as they found a rhythm.

"Does that feel…good?" He choked out, feeling the pleasure swirl through his blood at the way Amy sounded. Looked. Smelled. Writhing on his lap.

_Oh, my God…._

"You feel so…so good. Oh, Sheldon. Yes," Amy bit out, the words coming from her sweet mouth sounding carnal and undeniably sexy. Sheldon's eyes widened as the sound of it reverberated in his head. He smiled… a sexy, sinful smile that had Amy grabbing his back to steady herself.

"How…how good?" He murmured, on the edge of the world and ready to fling himself off. She was magnificent, his Amy…dragging him out of his self- imposed prison and into the light. He wanted to give her everything.

Amy felt her core flood with wetness, the throbbing unbearable. They both were breathing heavily, and Sheldon reached down and resumed his earlier fondling, enraptured by how aroused she was.

Emboldened, Sheldon leaned over to whisper in her ear.

"Did I do this to you? Did I make you this excited?" He asked her, his voice tender, sexy, innocent and dominant all rolled into one. He stroked her faster and faster, and as Amy shuddered and cried out in his ear, he couldn't take it anymore. He pulled the panties off of her, ripping them almost in half before burying his fingers inside of her.

"Oh, God. Sheldon, please." She screamed, a panting mess. The level of pleasure she felt was almost frightening. The level of lust _he_ felt was almost maniacal.

"I-It's too…too much." She whimpered, her legs beginning to shake. Sheldon tightened his grip around her waist.

"Is it?" He coaxed, whispering sensually in her ear. "Are you sure?"

"Nuh…" She groaned, unable to even comprehend who this man was. Her sweet, innocent Sheldon was nowhere to be found.

Sheldon had never before felt so clear. So alive. It was as though the Universe was pinpointing down to this very moment. Nothing else. Roughly, he kissed her ear, whispering the words that would bring Amy to her knees.

"I'm going to give you everything you've ever wanted, Amy Farrah Fowler. Starting tonight. I've devoted my life to the secrets of Science. Now I want to devote my life to discovering _your_ secrets. Show me what you desire. Tell me. Tell me everything," He begged, and Amy bit her lip so hard she almost drew blood.

"Oh…you. I want…you." She said, each syllable sounding strained.

"Tell me. What do you want me to do? Whatever you want…it's yours. Say it, Amy." He begged again, rocking against her with abandon.

"Oh, God…please…Sheldon. Make me come. I need you to make me come," Amy cried, and Sheldon lost it.

He had never heard such words in his entire life. Never thought he'd _want_ to hear them. The way they sounded, pulled from her throat in the most sensuous way possible, made him want to eat her alive.

"Amy...yes. Yes," He moaned, kissing her so hard it was almost bruising, Sheldon pumped his hips into hers frantically. The friction of their garments was making Amy crazy as it slid against her. He felt her body trembling wildly, the feel of her too much for him to assimilate. He feared being inside of her would literally _kill_ him. But he was _more_ than willing to risk it.

He held her tightly against him, trying to convey how much he needed her, body and soul.

"I'm…oh," She cried, losing her rhythm and Sheldon felt animalistic pride overwhelm him. He knew what was coming. And it was _his_.

"Yes, Amy…You're mine. I love you," He said huskily, stroking a nipple with his tongue before sucking it forcefully into his hot mouth. Amy came apart in his arms, crying out.

"Oh, Baby…" She yelled, her entire body shaking. When she clenched down on his hard flesh, Sheldon nearly blacked out. He grabbed her by the waist, pulling her to him urgently. Three shallow pumps was all it took for Sheldon to follow her into bliss.

_Baby?_ Jesus…he liked the sound of that.

They held each other, panting and moaning, coming down from their incredible high. They were soaking wet, sweat covering them from head to toe. Neither one cared or dared to move.

After an eternity, Amy pulled back, gazing at him with rapt eyes. Sheldon swallowed thickly and licked his lips. He stared at her, unblinking. His gaze was incredulous at what they just shared. He felt this overwhelming urge to do this again. And again. And to never stop.

Without a word he stood up, her legs around his waist, and walked them both into the shower. Amy laid her head on his shoulder, too weak to move.

This was only Friday….He was going to be the absolute death of her. She knew it.

RIP, Amy Farrah Fowler.

A/N- Thank you for reading.


	34. Chapter 34

~Chapter 34~

A/N – I am truly humbled, honored, and pleased that you enjoyed the last Chapter so much. This chapter, obviously, means a great deal to me. Both as a writer, and as a Shamy Shipper. This journey I've written for Sheldon and Amy isn't over. A few more surprises await our Power Couple from Pasadena. But this is the end of one era in their lives, and is the beginning of a new one. This is _NOT_ all about sex. Again, I apologize if any reader takes this as being OOC. This is about a normal, healthy couple moving forward and progressing in their relationship. Do you remember your first love? And that moment when you finally shared something so beautiful, so amazing…that it took your breath away?

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…She was morning, and I was nighttime. I one day woke up to find her lying beside my bed. I softly said…come take me. For I've been lonely in need of someone. As though I'd done someone wrong somewhere, but I don't know where, I don't know where…come lately. You are the Sun, I am the Moon, you are the words, I am the tune, play me…" Neil Diamond – Play Me

Amy watched Sheldon at the counter, chatting with the salesgirl as she rang up his purchase – Minnie Mouse ears with the name _Amy_ stitched across the top in bright red thread.

Amy smiled widely. He looked so carefree and happy; his exuberance evident as he took the large bag from the woman, his eyes sparkling at her handy work.

He had insisted on buying Amy Minnie Mouse ears to match the Mickey Mouse ones Penny had bought him so many years ago. At first, Amy cringed at the idea of owning such a silly memento. But as she saw Sheldon's eyes light with joy as he voiced the idea, she found herself smiling and accepting the sweet gesture.

Sheldon of old would never have engaged in such a 'silly' concept as His &amp; Hers anything. As he pointed out the first time he told her they wouldn't live together – the bath towels she thought of buying. To know that now, he wanted to share something with her that was so near and dear to his heart…touched her in ways she couldn't voice. The more she thought about it, the more fragile her heart became.

As he got stuck in a traffic jam at the entrance to the store, Amy leaned against the building and eyed her boyfriend up and down in open appreciation.

After their nocturnal activities last night, and the subsequent hot shower which they shared afterward, both fell into a peaceful sleep wrapped together under the blankets. This time, in contrast to what the last two sleepovers entailed, there were no set sides. They came together in the center of the bed, arms comfortingly wrapped around one another's.

She couldn't calm her pounding heart down after he lovingly washed her, before silently leading her to the bed and moving aside the duvet for her to enter.

Amy lay against him quietly in the cool darkness, feeling his heart beat against her chest. She breathed in deeply, the scent of him still on her. It was perfect and comforting. He had brought her such rapture, such unequivocal joy.

She hardly knew what to feel, what to think; her mind was a scrambled mess in the best possible way.

Sheldon Cooper was in love with her. Sheldon Cooper wanted her. The man who moved against her last night, letting down those walls he had erected so high and secure…gave her the sweetest and most generous gift. It was the most beautiful thing she'd ever experienced. And what made it even sweeter, was that he wasn't ashamed. Wasn't afraid.

He'd woken up before her this morning, simply gazing at her silently in the quiet peace of dawn. Amy had opened her eyes, finding him watching her with such a look of contentment, that for a moment she thought she was dreaming. His eyes were clear, his face glowing. Amy chuckled, thinking it a paradox that he looked so innocent after the way he behaved last night, and the things he uttered to her in the heat of passion. They had been silent all night, words unnecessary in light of what they'd shared.

The thing that really made her tremble, was how it wasn't over. He had promised her a weekend of romance, and he was making good on that promise.

"Happy Anniversary," He had whispered gently, cautiously pulling her closer. He actually looked…shy.

Amy understood that perfectly. Remembering how she cried out to Sheldon, mauling him as he touched her, made her a bit shy, as well. She lowered her eyes demurely.

"Happy Anniversary," She had whispered back.

"How did you sleep?" He asked her, his voice deep and scratchy. It only made his words sound sexier. Amy stretched like a kitten, the pleasurable release of lactic acid in her muscles making her feel drugged.

"Wonderfully. And you? How did you sleep?" She ventured, waiting for any sign of distress or regret.

None was forthcoming as a slow, sexy grin bloomed across his face. He had looked adorable this morning – messy hair, whiskers, and sleepy eyes. Amy's heart had tried to beat a path out of her chest.

"Amazingly _well_, Dr. Fowler," He whispered, his eyes staring into hers with wonder.

"That's…good." She had stated, her eyes flickering down to his sensual mouth. Oh, how she wanted to taste him again. It seemed the more she got of him, the more she wanted.

Sheldon copied her gesture, his eyes staring at her mouth with longing.

They were both trapped in their thoughts, images and emotions overwhelming them.

Suddenly, Sheldon briskly jumped out of bed informing Amy that they had a busy day ahead and they must get dressed.

He was ever the creature of habit, her boyfriend.

"Oh, just five more minutes," She begged him, shooting him a hopeful smile. Sheldon wasn't having it.

"I don't think so, little lady. We have a schedule to keep if we are going to fit in everything we have planned. Besides, five more minutes won't matter either way."

Amy's eyes widened.

"Exactly! So it won't matter if we do it," She reasoned, smirking as she watched Sheldon's eyes ignite. He walked over to the bed, leaning down to hover over her. Amy looked up expectantly.

"Don't think just because you've cast your magic spell on me that I will bend to your every whim, vixen." He whispered, his voice laced with something Amy had never heard from him before. She blinked at him, unable to find her voice. When her senses were restored to her, she answered the only way that she could.

"Hoo…"

Pulling back, Sheldon folded his arms and gave her a long, intrusive stare.

"That's what I thought," He said cockily, leaving her there to wonder just what the hell had happened to her clueless Sheldon.

After a delicious breakfast in the hotel restaurant, Sheldon abandoning his normal Saturday routine of high fiber cereal and embracing the chaos by ordering scrambled eggs and bacon, they were off the short distance to Disneyland Park.

Coming back to herself, Amy laughed at the joyous look on Sheldon's face as he approached her, pulling out the Minnie Mouse ears and presented them to her. He made a flourish of the presentation, bowing slightly. Amy grinned.

"Now we have a matching set," He said happily, his dimples startling her. Amy found herself smiling back, her grin spread wide across her mouth.

"So we do. Thank you, Sheldon." She whispered with such sincerity, that Sheldon felt a twinge of tears tickle his throat. She moved closer to him, standing on tiptoe to kiss his cheek tenderly. Lingering there, she looked up and watched how Sheldon lowered his head to give her better access, and how his eyes slipped shut as she didn't pull away right away.

The chaste kiss was broken when they heard laughter besides them, and each turned to see a group of teenagers pointing at them. Sheldon blushed ten shades of red, but Amy was not affected. She didn't care who witnessed their PDA; he was her man and if she wanted to kiss him in public, so be it.

Sheldon cleared his throat loudly.

"Well, then…I think Space Mountain is our next stop. Unless you have any objections?" He asked tentatively. Amy shook her head.

"No…but please tell me you aren't going to be sick. I've heard horror stories from Penny and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little worried."

Sheldon scowled.

"I was only sick that time because Penny plied me with junk food," He said petulantly. Amy rolled her eyes at that.

"Yes, well…you were an adult, Sheldon. You didn't have to shovel in the candied apples and churros'," She said, chuckling. Pursing his lips, Sheldon relented with a nod.

"I suppose you're right. But I promise…I'll be fine."

Amy nodded once in approval.

"Okay, then."

They made their way back to Tomorrowland, waiting in line for the popular ride. Amy took a moment to watch Sheldon unguarded as he was engrossed in a map of the park and tried to decide what their next destination should be.

He was dressed today in his grey pants that she had always secretly loved; the ones that hugged his hips and thighs like a second skin, and his red flash t shirt. She noted with delight that the shirt seemed a tad small on him now. He had really filled out over the years, developing muscles seemingly out of nowhere. She had no complaints before; she fell in love with Sheldon the way he was. But she couldn't deny it; seeing him so…buff lately – was highly appealing.

Sheldon, in turn, studied Amy when he thought she wasn't looking. She had this glow about her today that was so strong. Maybe it was his imagination, but he felt this strange sense of awareness every time a male looked her way. It was as if…they knew she had been pleasured the night before, and they could sense Sheldon had marked his territory.

Silly, strange, and nonsensical.

Yet as a Scientist, he knew the facts. Pheromones were potent, and Amy Farrah Fowler was definitely giving them off. He held his head high proudly, letting every potential threat within a mile's distance know that she was _his_.

Their turn came to board the rocket, and Sheldon helped Amy into the lower compartment before stepping in behind her. They each buckled the safety harness, and Sheldon leaned forward to catch Amy's attention.

"Are you scared?" He asked her seriously, no teasing in his voice. Amy turned her head, peering at him lovingly.

"A little. But I've been on bigger roller coasters then this one before, at Six Flags. I should be fine."

Sheldon nodded, his eyes narrowing in concern.

"I'd better hold your hand," He decided, reaching his arm forward to grasp her hand tightly. Amy faced the front, trying to hide her smile.

"Thank you, Sheldon. That is very cavalier of you."

Sheldon nodded, leaning forward to breathe in her delicious scent as the rocket began its journey.

"You're my girlfriend. Your well-being means everything to me," He whispered tenderly in her ear, making her entire body shiver.

The rocket bounced along, it's twists and turns in the dark making the passengers of the car scream, laugh, and holler. Amy squeezed Sheldon's hand tightly, a particular dip making her stomach drop to her feet. The feeling wasn't entirely bad; it felt a lot like love, she decided. Exhilarating, out of your control, and wonderful. She cried out in laughter, delighted when Sheldon leaned forward and grazed her neck with his lips.

"It's amazing," He said loudly, over the sounds of metal gears, screams, and raucous laughter.

Amy laughed heartily, never wanting the ride to end.

When they arrived back at the docking station, Sheldon jumped out on unsteady legs and held out his hands to Amy in assistance.

"That was highly enjoyable," Amy gushed, her eyes bright and her straight hair a windblown mess around her face. She looked gorgeous. Sheldon's blood zinged through his body as he watched her.

"Can we do that again?" She asked, eyes hopeful as she stared at her boyfriend.

Sheldon laughed in happiness.

"Perhaps later. There's a lot of park to see," He said.

He pulled her shyly against him as they made their way back out towards the entrance. Amy looked up at him in silent question as he fitted her tightly to his side.

"I'd better walk you out, just in case. It's dark in here. And you're 954 times more likely to fall down in the dark after you've been on a roller coaster. It's to do with equilibrium," He said with scientific aloofness. Amy smirked at him.

"Is that a fact, Dr. Cooper? Or just a ruse because you really wanted to cop a feel?" She asked saucily as his arm tightened around her back, skirting dangerously close to her backside.

Unruffled, Sheldon shrugged non-committedly.

"Oh, it's a scientific fact, Dr. Fowler. Of course…if you'd like to take your chances here in the dark, who am I to argue?" He sighed indifferently.

Who indeed?

Amy steered them to a dark alcove out of line from other guests, turning and backing him up against the wall. Sheldon walked backwards, his body touching the plaster with an unforgiving thump.

They stared at each other in the fluorescent darkness, shadows dimly illuminating their faces. Amy reveled as she watched Sheldon swallow deeply as his large eyes peered down at her.

"Hmm…I think I rather _like_ taking chances in the dark," She whispered sensuously, licking her lips as Sheldon's eyes grew even wider.

Good _Lord_….

A quiet gasp escaped Sheldon as Amy moved even closer, her eyes level with his sternum. She slowly looked up at him from beneath her lashes. Sheldon was spellbound.

"Um…if that is your wish," He croaked, his voice a painful tremor. Amy smiled a slow, feminine smile.

"Oh…it is. My _wish_." She whispered, the adrenaline spike of the coaster flowing through her veins.

Sheldon pulled back from the wall, his arms sliding around her back and leading her even further into the shadows. They were now behind a mock control tower, its gadget lights flickering wildly. They stared at each as on the other side of the wall, guests filtered in and out, laughing and chatting.

Sheldon didn't know what had come over him. His entire body was thrumming with anticipation. He turned her around, facing away from him.

"What else would you like to do in the dark?" He whispered in Amy's ear hotly, running his lips along the shell. Amy's entire body trembled as she melted against him. The arm around her waist slid up and rubbed her stomach just below her bra line.

Oh…

"Um…lots…lots of things," She whispered back, turning her head so that Sheldon could access her neck. He smiled against her carotid artery.

_Vixen._

"I see," He murmured, sliding his nose against her throat as he inhaled her deeply.

This was crazy. What on _Earth_ was he doing?

"Sheldon," She groaned quietly, trying to keep herself together.

"Yes?" He whispered innocently, latching onto her neck and placing a tender kiss there. Amy moaned. Sheldon smiled. And as last night came flooding back, she reacted.

Turning back around, she pulled Sheldon's face down and kissed him roughly, startling him out of his cockiness and sending him into a stupefied daze. Shuddering, he allowed Amy to move him back against the wall again, never breaking contact with his mouth. As she sucked on his lower lip, her tongue snaking out to soothe the bite, Sheldon groaned.

Just as quickly as the kiss began, it ended, Amy pulling back to smile at him sweetly. Sheldon looked at her in shock.

"As a Scientist, I think further testing is required as to what one would deem enjoyable in the dark. What are your thoughts, Dr. Cooper?" She asked, all professionalism and propriety. Sheldon's mouth fell open in a soundless gasp.

"I…I think you're right, Dr. Fowler," He agreed, his harsh breaths escaping his nostrils noisily. Amy smiled a prim smile, nodding.

'_I'll show him who has the upper hand'_, she thought wickedly.

Amy made to leave, Sheldon following after her silently. He was heartened when she turned, took his hand in her own, and together they walked side by side out of the attraction.

They spent the rest of the day going from land to land, absorbing the ambience and each other's company. The park wasn't closing until midnight, but they decided to leave at five pm to eat dinner before their scheduled massage at eight. They caught a shuttle bus to Downtown Disney, touring the promenade before settling on Rainforest Café for dinner.

"Sheldon, this had been an amazing day. Thank you so much for this," Amy said sincerely as the waitress brought their check. Sheldon signed his name with flourish, pocketing his credit card briskly.

"My pleasure, Amy. I hope you've been enjoying yourself."

Any more enjoyment, and she might not make it home in one piece, she thought wryly. She merely smiled.

"Yes. I have. I hope you have, as well?" She ventured.

His eyes met hers and just like that, they were back to where they started at Space Mountain.

"Oh, yes." He assured her, not breaking her gaze.

As they waited for the shuttle bus to pick them up and take them back to their resort, Amy turned to him. She stopped and started her question three times, before finally just letting it out.

"Sheldon? Are you scared? About…the massage?" Amy asked tentatively.

Sheldon bit his lip, turning to face her. He knew, without a doubt, that she was _not_ talking about the massage here. But he decided to play along, to diffuse the tension he knew they both felt. Staring her right in the eyes, he shook his head.

"No. I'm not. Are you?" He asked, knowing that while his girlfriend could be all talk sometimes, she was a scared little girl in many ways. Perhaps she _was_ frightened. If that were the case, he needed to know. He would never do anything to upset her or rush her. But to his great relief, Amy shook her head in the negative.

"No. I'm not, either." She stated confidently.

Reaching down, Sheldon took her hand in his. Silently, they boarded the bus back to the hotel.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sheldon looked at Amy from beneath his thick lashes as they lay side by side on separate tables. Amy wanted to close her eyes and enjoy the bliss she was experiencing, but Sheldon's gaze was much too powerful to deny. His blue eyes practically bore a hole through her as he watched her with intensity. It wasn't like he never saw her naked before; and she was more dressed here than she was on any of those…occasions. She had a bath sheet wrapped around her body which dwarfed her; but the way his eyes roamed her body with hunger made her shake. She wondered idly if the masseuse noticed.

Amy let her drowsy lids flutter, never closing fully, as she surreptitiously followed Helen's hands on Sheldon's body. She could hardly believe he was allowing this; willingly being touched by a stranger. He reasoned to her that he was going to approach it as he would going to the Dr.- it was a therapeutic touch, and therefore alright. He was trying to retrain his brain into accepting such a scenario.

She was so content to lay here and be feasted with the bounty that was semi naked Sheldon Cooper.

He was long, lean, and lanky, with just enough muscle to entice. Sheldon had skin the color of fresh cream tinged with rosewater. Silky yet firm. Her thoughts drifted back to last night. An involuntary moan escaped her lips as she remembered the feel of Sheldon's manhood in her hands, the way he felt between her legs, so hard…the way he dragged her against him repeatedly and took every ounce of pleasure from her. He seemed to bring the passion out of her effortlessly.

Somewhere in the last few months, he had changed. Somewhere along the way, he had surrendered. And something told her now, that tonight was special. Perhaps he'd planned it this way. It didn't matter to Amy. She'd wanted him forever. If he was ready, then she was ready, too.

Her eyes strayed to that part of him, hidden beneath the thick towel. She knew now, after years in the dark, what Sheldon Cooper had underneath his clothing. Just the thought of it made her shiver. She followed his treasure trail up to Sheldon's pecs, her gaze fixed there as Rita worked on her shoulder blades. It felt so good, having the kinks and knots worked out, that she moaned in appreciation. Her eyes met Sheldon's who was watching her, slack jawed.

Tendrils of her hair had fallen lose from her bun, lending her a disheveled look that made his heart race. His perfect brain supplied that the last time she looked thusly, was last night as they engaged in nerve shattering foreplay.

It was an odd feeling, watching someone give his girlfriend a massage. The way she moaned and stretched due to the relaxing ministrations stirred something inside of him. He suddenly felt the need to give that to her.

There was no reason to be jealous of Rita; the woman was heterosexual, in her forties, and this was a family establishment. Yet he couldn't shake the dominant feeling that coursed through his blood knowing someone else's touch was pleasing her. There was no way in hell he could allow a man to massage her.

The massage continued for another hour, sending them both into total relaxation. When it was over, Sheldon smiled across the expanse at Amy, who laughed at his goofy grin. This was a great idea, and she was so happy that he thought of it.

Sheldon thanked Rita and Helen, giving them both a generous tip. They told him the concierge would be up later to retrieve the tables. Sheldon nodded at them, asking Rita if morning would work. She said of course, and he closed the door, flicking the lock. He turned back to the sitting room, his eyes meeting Amy's as she sat up from her table.

They watched each other in guarded arousal; each feeling the urge to claim. But the night was young, and Sheldon drew in a very deep breath to steady his emotions.

He slowly made his way over to Amy, stepping up between her legs which were dangling off the massage table. Amy leaned back a bit to accommodate him, and the sharp sting of arousal raced up her spine.

"Did you enjoy that?" He asked huskily, reaching in to wrap his arms around her torso and sliding back to lock her into his embrace. She still wore the bed sheet securely around her, yet the heat from his touch singed her to her core. While she most definitely _did_ enjoy the relaxing massage, it was witnessing _his_ pleasure of the massage that made her feel wild with desire.

It was in no way sexual; the very professional Helen did not touch Sheldon inappropriately, or do anything untoward. It was simply seeing him relaxed and letting his guard down that touched her so. That, and the fact he kept his eyes on her the entirety. Perhaps, he was thinking the same thing.

"Yes I enjoyed it very much. I feel boneless right now," She chuckled, looking up at him with a joyful gaze he found completely intoxicating. His eyes crinkled as a wry smile graced his mouth.

"Thank you, Sheldon. I know that couldn't have been comfortable for you. But did you enjoy it?" She asked hopefully, reaching up to smooth his wayward hair. He looked rumpled and adorably sexy.

Sheldon smiled, but looked away.

"I did enjoy it, Amy. It wasn't as bad as I'd feared. I've probably been needing a massage, after the last year. I didn't realize how tense I was," He said seriously.

The hesitant tone of his voice alerted her that something, however, was off.

"But," She ventured?" Trying to meet his gaze.

"I have to admit, Amy…I didn't like knowing someone else was bringing you pleasure. It made me feel…strange. I don't know…" He trailed off, looking suddenly shy. She was having none of that, though.

"Hey…You know it's different, right? It's not that same feeling as when _you _touch me. Trust me," She assured, her voice deep. His eyes shot back to hers, and he rubbed his lower lip with his thumb and forefinger.

Oh, that pouty bottom lip was going to do her in. He bit said lip as his eyes scanned her face, sliding down to her chest, and lower to her legs…before completing the circuit and returning to her eyes. His blue orbs were the color sapphire now, and Amy's breathe quickened. Her brilliant boyfriend was too observant for his own good. He narrowed his eyes, assessing her.

"Are you alright? You're breathing rather rapidly," He remarked, and Amy wondered if he was being sly and sarcastic. She was about to reply in kind with a saucy retort, when she noticed he was genuinely concerned for her. She had to smile at his innocence. One moment, a sex god. The next, a toddler. It was too endearing and she felt her heart clenching from the love she felt for this man. She laughed heartily, leaning up to whisper in his ear. The feel of her breath on the sensitive appendage made him shiver.

"Yes…I'm fine. Trust me…it's just…don't you know the effect you have on me, Sheldon? Don't you know what that look does to me, or what the sound of your voice does to me when you talk to me so tenderly? You have _no_ idea the thoughts that go through my head." She admitted, shaking her head at her obvious need.

Sheldon gasped quietly, turning his head to the side to meet her soft gaze. She was only being honest; that was what they both demanded from this point on. She wasn't being forward or overtly sexual. But the words she spoke made his body react. He licked his lips, his eyes sliding down to look at her mouth.

"What do they do to you? My looks and my voice?" He asked hoarsely, genuinely interested, yet half fearing the answer.

Amy drew back to meet his gaze full on. His face was as open as she'd ever seen it. He was looking at her with a mixture of desire and expectation, and the fact broke her heart in a very good way. She could hardly let herself believe Sheldon was almost there; at the point where he opened his heart to her completely. If the look on his face was any indication, they were closer than ever. While she had always been honest with her feelings, she had been just as guarded as he throughout their relationship. The time for hesitation was over, though. His direct question deserved a direct answer.

"You make me want to cry. Because I have so much love for you, and it's spilling out the ends of me so I can't contain it all. I never expected to love anyone this much. It's new and scary and magical and I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I feel like a blind woman, stumbling around in the dark. You make me want to lay you down and make love to you all night long. I want to feel your body and taste your breath and hold you. I want to bring you pleasure and I want you to scream my name over and over, because I am who you belong to. I want to learn each and every secret you have, all of _your_ desires, Sheldon…and I want to fulfill them, one by one. I want to give you everything. All of that from a simple look. That is what you do to me. What you have _always_ done to me. There is no turning back for me. Not now. And now… you know all of my deepest, darkest secrets."

Sheldon didn't know if he wanted to cry or laugh. The beauty and sexiness of her bold speech left him stunned. Was it possible to love another person as much as he did in this moment? To the point where every cell and ounce of himself were emptied out and refilled by her? She was a part of his very soul, his infinite mind…how was that possible? What perplexed him more, was how it did not bother him anymore in the slightest. How he reached this place of absolute certainty, he would never know. He could only thank god or the universe or whoever was responsible that she found him.

"Amy…It's always been you. From the very moment I laid eyes on you. It was you. I knew it then. I've been so scared and selfish. I've cost us years of heartache and stress because I couldn't face it. I couldn't take what I wanted because I told myself I didn't deserve it, I didn't need it, and I didn't want it. I was such a liar and a coward. You've stripped me bare, Amy Farrah Fowler," He said in wonder, not a trace of worry or remorse in his voice.

Amy swallowed as she watched the emotions cross his face in a rush. A lesser woman would have taken advantage of every opportunity she had over the years to seduce him. But she was different, and he trusted her now because of that. All Amy could do as she gaped at the man of her dreams was smile in feminine joy; a look so pure and full of passion that it was almost like a halo around her. It was precisely _that_ look that sealed her fate. Sheldon felt his blood sizzling in his veins, the fervor to make her his entirely overwhelming everything.

He wanted her, right now. He _needed_ her, more. Sheldon lowered his head, kissing her deeply and leaving her breathless. No reserve, no shyness, no warning. Just complete and utter abandon. He boldly thrust his tongue gently into her mouth, loving the way she gave a shocked moan. He adored that he could surprise her still. He hoped he could always give her these simple pleasures. He would do his damnedest to try.

Amy sat up straighter, trying to match his intensity but it was impossible. He pushed her back onto the table, hovering over her in a standing position and overpowering her small frame. She quivered as he broke away from her swollen mouth, trailing his lips down the side of her neck to latch onto her jugular. He gathered the tender pulse point into his mouth, sucking delicately. Amy began to pant. She tried to grab onto the towel wrapped around his waist for support, but her hands were limp as he moaned against her skin.

She tasted like almonds from the oil Rita had used. Everything about her was delicious. He was far past the point of rationality now. All that mattered was becoming one with the woman he loved. It was corny, and cliché, and it was their anniversary and whatever...he didn't care anymore. He had fought a long battle with himself, and he'd lost.

If there was going to be a victor in this war, then he was glad it was going to be Amy.

"I want you more than I've ever wanted _anything_," He admitted ardently, sliding up her body and meeting her eyes in complete surrender.

She watched him, unblinking, not willing to miss a word he spoke or a look. This was their pivotal moment, she knew it. His words were passionate, and she had no defense against them. Every cell in her body was shouting out, spinning out of control, at the look in his eyes. Her world was spinning on its axis, and she prayed when the inertia deposited her back on terra firma, a part of her still existed to enjoy this. Remember this. For it would be her digital memory that she would carry from this life into the next, and the one beyond.

"Really? Even…a Nobel?" She asked breathily, trying to maintain a level of lightheartedness. Sheldon's reaction, though, was anything but.

He looked at her hungrily, fearing she'd disappear. He kissed her ear, before whispering in it words she had longed to hear, possibly from the beginning of time.

"Yes…_even_ a Nobel." He answered honestly, his voice sounding haunted, yet sure. Amy swallowed deeply as she let that sink in.

Sheldon wasn't finished, though.

"Make no mistake, Amy…it's not just your _mind_ I want. I want your heart, because I love it. It is pure and beautiful and calls to me. It's mine. It belongs to me. It belongs _with_ me. I want your soul, because I respect it. I will protect it and nurture it. It will be my friend and my conscience. I will guard it. And I want your body," He said gruffly, sliding his hands up to cup her breasts through the towel and making Amy's heart shatter in her chest, "Because I _crave_ it. I want you so much. I want to know what it feels like to be a part of you. I don't know how this happened to me. I don't…but it doesn't matter anymore. All that matters… is you." He said thickly, kissing her décolletage and deftly removing the towel. Amy shuddered as he rubbed her breasts, his thumbs teasing her hardening nipples.

She had always known, deep down, that Sheldon possessed an animal intensity inside of him. That alpha male that came out when he was competitive, the way things had to be in his favor, his control. To be the object of his obsession at this moment was intoxicating. It was worth every moment of waiting.

"Is this really happening?" She cried, and in answer, Sheldon gripped her hips, hard, pulling her off the table and into his arms. Her towel fell away, leaving her naked before him except for a silky pair of panties. The feel of his naked chest against hers was too much. The way his sparse, soft hair tickled her sensitive skin left her reeling. She needed to lie down, or she would surely fall over.

Sheldon kissed her softly, his lips nibbling hers before deepening the kiss. Her mouth opened under his tender coaxing, her tongue languidly stroking his. She slid her tongue along his inside upper lip, and Sheldon whimpered helplessly.

"Say you want me, say you want _this_," He begged, already at the point where he was crazed with desire. It was frightening in its intensity. He sounded positively terrified she would say no. He needed assurance that they were both ready. Sheldon lowered his face to her chest, rubbing his soft hair against her tender flesh.

How could he doubt her? She came back from New York with him, because she couldn't live without him. She had waited four years for him, because she adored him.

"Sheldon…You know I do. I want you so much it hurts. Make me yours," She pleaded, not caring how wanton she sounded. He walked her backwards through the suite, until they landed on the bed with a thud. It was soft and plush, and felt like a cloud. Very fitting, Amy thought in a daze as Sheldon kissed her neck and shoulders relentlessly. He drew her remaining garment down her legs, his eyes taking her in with wonder. Reaching down, he divested himself of his towel and briefs for her appreciative eyes.

God…he was a sight to behold.

"Lie back," He instructed shakily, reaching over to the nightstand to grab his toiletry kit. Securing a couple of condoms he had bought when he went to the drugstore the other day, he flung them on the bed out of sight. Amy's eyes wandered over his body, amazed at how beautiful he was. Sheldon gripped her by the waist, sliding her further up the mattress to make her comfortable.

He was so hard it hurt; the idea of mating with his beloved Amy making him swell even more. He tried to remember everything he'd ever read about female orgasm during intercourse. It would probably hurt the first time, and he knew he had to prepare her. He gave himself a mental smirk; like that was going to be labor intensive. Giving her pleasure was Sheldon's new favorite hobby.

"I want you to enjoy this, Amy. Tell me what to do," He whispered, not wanting to hurt her. The sweetness of his request moved her more than she imagined. For all of his bravado and newfound testosterone, he was, at his core, the Sheldon she met and fell in love with; a scared little boy at heart who hid behind his intelligence to avoid emotional entanglements. That he would ask her help and admit he was out of his depth was monumental. She touched his cheek lovingly, and relished how he closed his eyes and leaned into her touch.

"Kiss me, Sheldon. Touch me. You've always known what to do. Don't worry," She reassured, and he smiled at her gratefully. Amy would never lead him astray. Even if he made a mistake, she would forgive him. He had never felt more comfortable and secure in his life. This felt so right, in so many ways.

He began by kissing her neck, her lips, her chest…he worshipped her body, lovingly rubbing her stomach and hips. She held his hand, lacing their fingers as he kissed her waist. He looked up and met her eyes, glazed over with love for him.

"I love you, Amy," He said, his voice strong and sure. She could not utter a single thing, allowing tears to slip from her eyes down to the bed below. A crazed form of longing began to spread through her, pushing out everything else.

"I have to touch you. Please, let me touch you, Sheldon," She begged, the breath in her lungs feeling heavy.

She watched as his blue eyes darkened before he slowly nodded his head. Amy's relief was palpable.

Sitting up, she reached down and took his manhood gently in her hands. He was hard already, but not completely, and the silky texture over the steel beneath made her wetness increase exponentially.

"Your hands feel wonderful," He grunted. Sliding down on his back and letting Amy have greater access. She took full advantage, cupping his testicles in one hand while pumping him gently with the other. He watched her, his vixen, working his flesh into a frenzy. He wanted to close his eyes, but he didn't want to miss a moment of what she was doing.

"You did this to me. Only you," He groaned, his hips moving in time to her strokes. Amy smirked as she remembered the question Sheldon posed to her in his room the day they updated the Relationship Agreement.

"And…who do you belong to Sheldon? Say it," She encouraged, her fingers sliding over the tip of him before gripping the shaft tighter and tighter. Sheldon moaned so loudly Amy was afraid the neighbors next door would hear. If you asked her later if she cared, the answer would have been no.

"You. I belong to you," He choked out, his voice strained. Amy smiled in victory.

"Damn right, you belong to me," She parroted, leaning down to kiss the tip of his member. Startled and aroused beyond belief, Sheldon sat up and switched their positions.

_Oh, Lord. If she kept going, this would be over rather quickly_, he surmised, content and happy to pleasure her.

For now.

Sheldon kissed his way down her body until he reached her womanhood.

"You might want to hang onto something, little lady," He teased, winking at her hotly. Amy nearly passed out at the overt sexuality in his voice.

He stroked her with his fingers a moment, spreading her wetness and transfixed by how aroused she was. He looked up, meeting her gaze with a sinful smirk.

"I knew what you meant all those years ago. About kissing you where you'd never been kissed," He clarified, his eyes drooping in arousal. Amy gasped as his confession registered.

"You…you did?" She questioned, squirming slightly. Sheldon nodded, licking his lips as his eyes traced her naked body from head to toe. Amy's limbs began to shake.

"Yes," He hummed, cocking his head to the side. Amy swallowed.

"If I had known how sweet you taste then, you would have been in trouble." He said honestly.

Amy feared she was in trouble _now_. Scratch that – _knew_ it as he lowered his mouth to her aching flesh.

"Oh, god. Yes, just like that." She said harshly, her body on fire as he continued the torturous pleasure, deepening his strokes. She was so wet, and the knowledge he did this to her made him crazy with desire.

He once feared this act, deeming it disgusting. What a fool he'd been. First his fingers, and then his tongue delved into her, sliding up to stroke her clitoris again and again before returning and nibbling on her tender lips. Amy was delirious, her lower body thrashing and shaking. She raised her pelvis, thrusting herself at Sheldon and he obliged her by latching on to her tightly.

'_She's so beautiful in her pleasure'_….he thought in a daze. _My beautiful Amy_… _why did I make you wait so long?_

Silently, he knew the answer. He wasn't ready then. He wouldn't be able to fully appreciate her and the role she was to play in his life until he experienced the heartache of almost losing her. That's what Professor Proton meant in his dream; by embracing the irresistible force that was Amy Farrah Fowler, his life was going to be transformed. He felt it already; the sharpness and clarity of his thoughts was remarkable. All it took, was laying down his fears, not giving in to them.

Now, as this spectacular creature writhed beneath him, he could only think of one thing: give her everything you have. Because she's worth it.

"Like this?" He whispered, flicking his tongue against her rapidly while his nose caressed her.

Oh, heavens…she was going to shatter.

Sheldon reached up, stroking her nipples with his fingers that were wet with her own arousal as he zeroed in and sucked her swollen nub into his mouth. Amy exploded with a loud cry, fisting the sheets in a death grip.

"Yes…yes…oh, yes…" She chanted, her body shaking.

Sheldon growled loudly as he licked his lips. He was harder than granite now, and couldn't wait a second longer to have her.

'_And that's how it's done_,' he thought cockily, reaching blindly for a condom. It would never cease to amaze him how the act of pleasuring Amy in any way increased his arousal exponentially. While he could admit he was selfish in other areas of his life, even competitive, he was a very generous lover to Amy. She brought out the generosity inside of him, and it was only natural to want to give it back to her, tenfold.

Amy looked at him through hooded eyes, her entire body flushed and throbbing. His eyes took her in, waiting to be claimed by him, and he felt on the verge of breakdown. An alien had overtaken his body and his mind, replacing them with a replica. Who was this being that had lust coursing through his body? He no longer cared as he clumsily rolled on the condom and secured it tightly. He kissed her neck, tentatively making his way to her mouth. He didn't know if she'd mind after what he just did, but when she grabbed his face and practically shoved her tongue in his mouth, he figured she didn't. It turned him on all the more witness her inhibition.

He wanted to say something profound, but couldn't find the words. He wanted to thank her for this gift, but could only muster a slight sound passing his lips. Amy stroked his cheek, forcing him to meet her eyes. What he saw there made him gasp out loud. Utter devotion. Love. Adoration. Want. Passion.

Madness.

She sensed his hesitation, even though his body was balancing on a razors edge. Trying to ground him, she whispered to him words she knew he needed to hear.

"You have never failed at anything, Sheldon Cooper, no matter what you think. You will be as magnificent at this as you are with everything else…except perhaps, three dimensional chess. I kick your _ass_ at 3d chess…" She trailed off, her lips forming a seductive smile. If there was any way to get his alpha juices flowing, it was to challenge him. He raised a perfect brow, his eyes boring into hers.

Game on, Fowler.

"Oh, you think so?" He whispered dangerously, sliding his hardness through her wetness slowly, trying to acclimate to the feeling. It was intoxicating. Sheldon groaned, still trying to maintain the upper hand in this conversation. Amy's eyes rolled back, her mouth going slack. Teasing Sheldon _did_ have its merits.

"Well…you could always prove to me you're the better player….later," She suggested, her hands sliding down to latch onto his ass. God, she loved his rear; it was perfect; round and tight.

Sheldon moaned as she flexed her fingers against him.

"That is acceptable, Dr. Fowler…but I assure you…I will not take pity on you. Not in the least," He warned, the tip of his manhood poised at her entrance. Amy gasped, her legs winding around Sheldon's waist in preparation. He gazed down at her playfully, still in character, and she smiled a smile so beautiful that he lost his breath for a second.

"I never doubted that for a moment, Dr. Cooper. Now go ahead…make your move. Your queen is awaiting capture." She whispered.

Sheldon pushed forward gently, aided by Amy's wetness. The sensation was maddening. Searing tightness surrounded him, and he bit out a harsh cry of pleasure.

"Oh, Jesus…you feel like heaven," He moaned harshly, burying his face in her neck. Amy tried to relax her muscles to allow for this onslaught. It was working fine until he moved almost all the way out, poised once again to thrust. His hips were burning, and he was harder than he'd ever been.

"This m-might hurt," He whispered, his body taut as a bowstring. Amy nodded, biting her lip. He pushed through, stretching her and pulling a broken whimper from her. She tightened her legs around him, urging him to stay still a moment so she could adjust to his size.

"Please, a minute," She asked quietly, and Sheldon nodded rapidly.

His body was on fire; the pleasure of being inside of her like nothing he'd ever experienced. He thought he knew life, and the mysteries of the Universe. How wrong he was.

For endless seconds they clung together, rocking slightly while he tried to keep still. Every instinct inside of him was demanding he move. Thrust. Take.

Amy cried silently and he detested knowing he was the reason. He leaned down, kissing her tears away.

"I'm so sorry, Amy. Better?" He whispered, and she shook her head in the affirmative.

"Okay," He breathed, not sure if he should move. She gently prodded him by once again squeezing his flesh.

"You can move, it's alright," She strained, her body softening to receive him. Sheldon felt the exact moment her silken walls accepted the intrusion, and his eyes slipped shut, unable to withstand the rapture.

She was snug, obviously, having never done this before. Her womanhood was warm and wet, adding to the pleasure he was experiencing. He knew the mechanics of sexual intercourse. He knew what went where, and what the outcome would be. But to experience the _feel_ of her…the woman he loved wrapped around him in such an intimate way…cradling him in a vice like grip that would have surely had him selling his soul to the devil if he believed in him.

Sheldon was dumbstruck. Dear lord…so _this_ was what the rest of humanity lived and died for. It was no wonder.

Amy undulated her hips, rocking beneath him. He moaned loudly as he pounded into her, gently yet firmly. She met him stroke for stroke, sliding against him erotically. He could barely breath, the pleasure was so intense.

"Dear lord…oh god…oh my god," He rasped, as he set a steady rhythm, his body instinctually knowing how to perform this age old dance. Amy found it amusing and sexy that for an atheist, he certainly called upon a deity an awful lot. Perhaps he _was _being a tad hypocritical, but she would let him slide…for now.

They moved together, mindless and burning, each trapped in a wave of euphoria greater than themselves. Sheldon stared down into Amy's eyes, the wonder and shock of what was happening inside of him mirroring in her own. She was right there with him.

Had it always been like this, under the surface? This tension, this need? Had he wanted to mark her as his own from the very first? It must have been there. It must have. There was an electricity in the air whenever they were together; he had previously chalked it up to physics. What it really was, was biological. The most basic, primitive biological imperative in the study of man.

Attraction.

While over the course of his life though Sheldon had found many people attractive, he was never attracted _to_ them.

That is, until Amy.

His first thoughts upon meeting her were, she is acceptable. For another person to date, that is. Slight build, pretty eyes, good skin. And she can speak eloquently. Also a plus. He tried to tell himself it was just a fluke. She meant nothing to him. He most assuredly did not believe in love, let alone at first sight. Yet he walked out of that coffee shop with her phone number, email, and address secured in his pocket.

That was the first lie that Sheldon Cooper told himself.

Time went by, and they conversed. Texts, emails, skype. They met for dinner. She became a part of his social circle. She became a part of his life. He told himself, she meant nothing to him. He classified her in the same category as Penny; a female in which he was friends. Nothing more. Until she expressed interest in Zack. Until she admitted she wanted Zack physically. Until she went on a date with Stuart. He told himself it didn't matter. She meant nothing to him. She was only his friend. And he didn't like her _that_ way.

That was the second lie Sheldon Cooper told himself.

She lamented he never showed her affection. He complained she was pushing him. She cried he was cold. He lashed out she was a hippy. She made him happy without even trying. He made her miserable without even caring. The push, the pull, the dance of love. He was his own man. He needed no one. He didn't need her. He never would.

The lies were mounting. Up and up they grew.

Until the day, he angrily strolled into her apartment, finding her near death. His lies lay around him in a broken heap, so clearly misplaced. She was his whole world. She was his everything. The key to his happiness, and the key to his success. He could have lost her, and in losing her, lost himself. He may have still been a coward in many ways, but he was no longer a fool.

Returning to himself, he gazed into the eyes of his precious other, her body so soft and giving underneath him. She caressed his back, tenderly running her fingers up his spine and making him shiver.

"I want to commit your every look, every sound to memory. I never want to forget it," He admitted, hitting a particularly pleasurable spot inside of her and making her eyes roll back. Amy cried out, squeezing her kegel muscles tightly and making Sheldon see stars.

"Oh, Amy…I can _feel_ that. Right there?" He whispered, repeating his movements and groaning when she drew her knees to her chest. The action made him slip deeper inside of her. He was as close as he could be, filling her completely so that his hardness bumped against her cervix. The pleasure for both of them was excruciating. Her mouth fell open as she thrust her pelvis against his shockingly fast.

"Ahh…Sheldon. Harder…harder…" She whimpered, and he answered her by thrusting harder and deeper. She was made for him. He had waited all of these years out of disinterest. She out of desire for something real. Together, they were creating an inferno.

Amy threw her head back into the pillow, in the process thrusting her breasts into his face. Sheldon took the hint and nibbled on them, greedily licking one nipple and then the other. She could feel the stirrings of orgasm coming on, knowing he was playing her body like a well- tuned instrument. While it was rare for a woman to orgasm the first time she lost her virginity, Amy knew better. As a neuroscientist, she was well aware that 90 percent of arousal begins in the brain. The love and passion she was experiencing went a long way toward completion. Add to that Sheldon's earlier oral ministrations, and how he was practically drilling her into the bed. She felt she could barely hold on. The coil was so tight in her belly that she needed little encouragement.

Sheldon sucked each of her nipples in turn, reaching up with both arms to grasp her hands in his. He secured them on the bed next to Amy's head, his hips taking on a life of their own as he pumped into her deeply. They moved together in sync, as two parts of the same wave…ebbing and flowing.

She met his eyes; his bluer than blue, feral eyes which were trained on her with intensity. She had never seen him look so handsome. Her heart ached for him. He could feel her walls tightening, the sensation making his flesh swell to epic proportions. He was so close. It appeared, she was as well.

He was making love to Amy.

_Making love._

Not sex.

Not coitus.

Not fucking.

He was making _love_ to her. And he'd never felt so full. So alive. So _real_. God…he couldn't imagine feeling any better. Keeping his eyes fixed to hers, he was unnerved at the depth of his emotions. He had fought long and hard _not_ to feel this. As if he ever could stop it. Tears began to fall from his eyes, landing on her cheeks and in her hair.

"I can feel you…in my soul. In every…every molecule. Oh, Amy. I had no idea. No idea it would be like this. Forgive me. Please forgive me," He whimpered in her ear. The out of character sentiment made her chest hurt. Tears appeared immediately, blinding her. But she couldn't look away from him.

The tightening around him increased, and he thought he would go blind with ecstasy. To know he was giving this to her, making her orgasm and sharing his with her, sharing his very _flesh_ with her…he wasn't sure he could take it without breaking down.

Amy's eyes held him tighter than any chain ever could. He would always remember her like this. She would be tattooed on his brain for eternity. The love in her eyes, the passion. He would never, ever forget.

"Let go, Amy. Give me everything. I love you so much. I will never love another the way I love you. You told me once…that I saved you… but it was…it was _you_ who saved me, Amy. It was you," He wept, panting…his tears burning his throat.

"Oh, God. Sheldon." She screamed.

Amy's body tensed and she gripped his back as she spasmed around him, Sheldon crying out from the feeling of her milking him. Good god…the feeling was exquisite. He held onto her, wrapping his arm around her hip as one hand still clutched her hand. He watched her come, delighting in her.

"Sheldon…Sheldon," She cried, giving him what he asked for. Everything.

He felt his heart splinter as he gazed down upon this most perfect woman; his little lady. His little lump of wool. His vixen. She would never outlive his love for her. He loved Science, but he worshipped Amy.

She met his gaze, and Sheldon saw himself trapped in her eyes. His body was out of control, his sanity hanging on by a mere thread.

"I love you. I love you. Come for me," She wailed, and Sheldon's eyes slid shut, surrendering.

"Amy…Amy," He chanted, out of breathe and stunned.

He let go of 34 years of solitude and loneliness, haughtiness and pain. His orgasm shot through him, fierce and fast, and he thought he would die before it was over. Sinking inside his Amy, every sin he every committed and every lie he ever told was forgiven. The slate was wiped clean. He felt like he was reborn, lying in the arms of his angel.

They lay still, breathing each other's air and their noses rubbing together. The chill of the room began to seep in, and Amy slowly reached over and threw the duvet over them. She was in no rush to disengage from him, and smiled against his lips as she realized he wasn't in any rush to leave her, either.

Her fussy, mysophobic boyfriend was joined with her, relishing the afterglow. The minutes ticked on before either one moved or spoke. It was the most intense experience of Sheldon's life. He had no marker for this; nothing could or would ever come close.

"Are you…alright?" He panted in her ear, suddenly afraid he'd hurt her. Amy shook her head, holding him tighter.

"Yes. I'm…good. More than good," She murmured, breathing deeply and trying to regain oxygen back into her lungs. "How about you. Are _you _alright?" She whispered tentatively. Sheldon pulled back to gaze at her incredulously.

"I can't believe the way I feel right now," He groaned, holding her tighter. Amy nodded, in complete understanding.

"Any regrets?" She asked, meeting his beatific gaze. The smile he gave her reminded her of the sunrise.

"Regrets," He echoed, pondering. "No. No regrets. Well, maybe _one_ regret." He said thoughtfully.

Amy raised her brows, waiting for his answer.

"I should _never_ have taught you how to play three dimensional chess. Now you know all of my secrets. What on earth was I _thinking?" _He lamented sadly_._

He tried to stifle the grin he was dying to display, but it was in vain when Amy burst into laughter, the sound bouncing off the walls and ricocheting through his heart and soul. God, she was such a vixen. But she was _his_ vixen. He was one lucky man.

"I do. I know all of your secrets now. And you know mine." Amy whispered after she calmed down from her laughter. Sheldon's smile slowly diminished, his earlier mirth morphing into something deeper.

"I have another secret for you," He said quietly in her ear.

Amy smiled tenderly.

"Oh? And what is that?" She asked.

Sheldon lowered his face to hers, staring into the eyes of the woman who owned him, body and soul.

"I discovered something, Amy Farrah Fowler. Would you like to know what that is?" He asked in his childlike way, making Amy's heart fly.

Amy nodded, unable to speak at the look on his face, the love in his eyes. He traced his fingers down her cheek, cupping it gently.

"You…are the key to my happiness." He stated with conviction, his voice sure and strong, and so happy.

If Amy had thought that she was going to die from the weight of love coursing through her before…she was gravely mistaken. Her mouth went slack as Sheldon smiled at her, letting her absorb his words.

The couple lay in silence, heartbeats returning to a normal rhythm, temperatures coming down as Sheldon gathered her close to his chest. That's when he heard it. Whispered gently, and wrapped with a gift bow of love.

"And you are mine."

A/N – Thank you for reading. Please be advised, this is only Part 1 of Saturday night. So much more to come. I was able to post earlier than my predicted Monday. I will be extremely busy over the next two weeks with family obligations, friends coming to stay with us from Vancouver, and work. I will update as soon as possible; most of Chapters 35 and 36 are written. Thank you for your patience. I look forward to sharing this with you. X


	35. Chapter 35

~Chapter 35~

A/N – I can't thank you all enough for your love. I've spent the evening answering reviews with tears in my eyes. To know I've done this couple justice makes me proud, indeed. I am honored at how you've embraced this story, and hope you enjoy what's ahead. Thank you for the song rec, Boys3allC. It's perfect.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep. I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you. You'll always be the one- You were the first, you'll be the last. Wherever you go, I'll be with you. Whatever you want, I'll give it to you. Whenever you need someone, to lay your heart and head upon. Remember after the fire, after all the rain- I will be the flame. I will be the flame…" Cheap Trick – The Flame

The world hadn't ended.

Sunday morning dawned, and the world as they knew it was still turning. The sun still broke across the horizon, the morning news still came on at its scheduled time, and civilization began another day.

Nothing was different. Yet _everything _had changed.

At least, for Sheldon Cooper.

He opened his eyes, the bright sun streaming through the window bathing the room in a delicate glow. His body was snuggled into Amy's. They were lying side by side, arms wrapped around one another, naked. He had never woken up naked beside another person before, not even Amy. Even Friday night, after their passionate tryst, they dressed in light clothing before falling into bed.

But now…

He couldn't imagine not wanting to feel her warm skin against his. Every night, for the rest of his life.

A delicious tremor moved through him from head to toe.

Focusing on his girlfriend, he admired the way her mouth crinkled up in sleep, and her eyes fluttered beneath her lashes. She looked relaxed and happy, and he stared at her in wonder for endless moments. The speed at which the events of the previous evening came back to him was fierce and fast. He took a deep breath, letting it out steadily.

"Wow…" He whispered quietly, shaking his head.

However inarticulate that sounded, even to himself, he didn't care. It wasn't to be helped. He never comprehended how sharing your body with another could be so fulfilling. Of course, it wasn't just anyone. It was Amy._ She_ was the variable. And it wasn't merely his body. It was his very soul.

His thoughts drifted as he watched her through half - mast eyes. He remembered the look on her face as he pleasured her, the way her body felt beneath his…responded to his…the expression in her eyes as she came apart in his arms. He remembered how she smelled of almonds and of _him_; his talc and cologne and that made him smile.

She was _truly_ his now - body, heart, and soul. All that was missing was a stamped paper. And not the Relationship Agreement, either.

_Another_ stamped paper.

A thought urged him on, unbidden, but he couldn't give it credence. Not yet. It was way too soon for him to even be considering such a thought.

Wasn't it?

He blinked it away, storing it in his eidetic memory for future use. For now, he was content to reminisce and enjoy.

They had called room service around eleven, feeding each other cheese &amp; crackers, fruit and brownies. Sheldon never allowed himself to eat so late; as it was, he rarely was up past 11 pm. But their lovemaking had left them both ravenously hungry.

Amy put on the TV, flipping to the in house Disney Channel. Sheldon smiled in delight as they sat on the floor, picnic style - eating, laughing, and teasing each other as they watched old Mickey Mouse cartoons from the 40's.

It was so easy with Amy, so effortless. He couldn't have imagined being this uninhibited with any other creature on Earth. He had truly found his missing half. The notion of soulmates used to make him laugh. And while he didn't intend to start broadcasting it all over southern California that his opinion had altered, he was quietly confident in the fact it did.

Sheldon watched Amy as she took a huge bite of a gooey brownie, feeling his heart swell with joy. It drew him back to last year's Valentine's Day, and the kiss he finally initiated. He didn't know what he was expecting when he threw himself at her; he had no idea what he was doing. But instinct took over, and he learned rather quickly. When he registered that her lips tasted like brownies, he was pleasantly pleased. A happy memory, indeed.

Amy moaned at the delicious taste, drawing him back to her. A huge dollop of fudge dropped on her lip, and she licked it away happily as Sheldon smiled. Her shy smile as she met his gaze was lovely and meaningful. This was perfect.

_She_ was perfect.

After a couple of hours enjoying the entertainment, food, and each other, Amy shifted on the floor to get more comfortable. Their earlier activities caught up with her, and she felt a stab of pain in her abdomen. She knew this might happen, but having no experience with sex before this, she wasn't entirely certain. Sheldon looked over to her, his brows furrowing as she winced slightly. He searched his memory for possible reasons, when the most obvious was staring him in the face.

Oh.

He had no experience with this sort of thing. He wondered how to broach the topic without sounding crass. Finally, he decided to be direct. Amy would understand.

"Amy…are you sore from our lovemaking earlier?" He asked tenderly, his embarrassment evident.

Amy had hoped he hadn't seen it, but she remembered who she was with. Sheldon might be naïve in many ways, but Sheldon saw everything.

Amy stared at him, impressed and touched that he knew enough about intimacy to ask her that.

"Yes," She answered honestly, equally shy.

Sheldon smiled sadly, averting his eyes and turning back to the TV. She marveled as she continued to watch him; loving the way meticulously put each square of cheese on the cracker, eating swiftly as to not get crumbs everywhere. Everything about him was precise and perfect. Perhaps that was due to the incredible love she felt for him, or just the endorphins from the afterglow of sex. Either way, she didn't care. He was perfect for_ her_, and that was all that mattered.

"I'm sorry, Amy. I didn't want to hurt you. I wish I could have been gentler," He said sincerely, breaking her out of her thoughts. He still wouldn't meet her gaze, so she scooted over…gingerly…and put her hand under his chin.

"You were wonderful, Sheldon - _more_ than wonderful. It couldn't be helped. I was a virgin. But I am so happy I waited for you. And what we shared together…It is a memory I will keep close to my heart until the day I die. You were passionate, and gentle, and I…" She trailed off and he dipped his head to study her.

"You… what?" He prompted, his voice a mere whisper. He waited patiently for her to answer him. When she did, it nearly stole his breath away.

"I _want_ you again. Does that sound crazy? Am I being too selfish or acting like a hippy?" She rushed out, and Sheldon swallowed the lump in his throat.

_She wanted him. Again…_

To her great surprise, Sheldon didn't laugh or give her a chiding look. In fact, his pupils dilated right before her, and his mouth fell open, slack jawed.

In all of his 34 years, no one…woman or otherwise, openly admitted they _wanted_ him. And in the most basic, primal way possible. He always assumed being the object of someone's affections was superfluous; having someone desire you was something he could live without. But now…after having experienced firsthand what being the object of _Amy's_ affections was like, he was positively certain he could never go back to the way it was before.

"No, Amy…it's not crazy. I want you too," He admitted, his eyes roaming over her face and then dipping lower. "But perhaps it's not a good idea- until you heal, and feel more…comfortable," He rushed to add, and Amy smiled wryly.

It was ironic; the Sheldon of old would have gone running at the idea of sex not once, but twice. Yet the disappointment on his face from thinking it was off the table was endearing. She always knew he was a sex god deep inside. All of that pent up energy, coupled with his intensity…and his strength…and his vast intelligence that made her want to pounce on him like a lioness…

Hoo...

Her wandering fingers reached up, caressing the hair at his temple. His eyes tracked her movements as she slid her hand into his hair, before slipping shut at the simple yet profound pleasure her touch elicited.

"Amy," He whispered, taking a deep breath. How was it she could inflame and soothe him in the same instance? He sighed, relishing her touch as he allowed a low growl to escape his parted lips. She found that the sexiest thing she had ever heard. His plump lower lip trembled as she slid her hand down to caress the nape of his neck, then around to his jaw. When she thought about everything he had done to make this weekend special for her, the tears began to gather in her eyes.

"In case I forgot to tell you earlier…thank you, Sheldon. You've made this weekend perfect. I don't know if I expressed my appreciation before." She said warmly.

Sheldon opened his eyes, momentarily losing himself in her soft gaze.

Oh…she had expressed her appreciation for him before just _fine_. The scratch marks on his back were proof of that.

"I'm the one who should be thanking you, Amy," He said soberly. "You have been so patient, and so very good to me. I don't deserve it, but I am grateful for it all the same. Thank you."

A lump formed in Amy's throat as she nodded. "You're welcome, Sheldon."

There was nothing else she could say. Sheldon was done with talking for now, as well. He wanted to return to bed, hold his Amy and drift away. But first, there was something else he wanted to do with her. For her.

Sheldon switched the TV off, throwing the remote on the coffee table as he stood slowly. He held his hand out to help Amy up, and she took it gratefully. The room was dark once again, save a few votive candles that were still burning from their earlier massage. They stared at one another, as Sheldon drew her to his chest closely. He took Amy's face in his hands.

"Do you still have that vanilla bath bomb?" He asked quietly. Amy nodded.

"Yes. It's in the bathroom. Why?"

Sheldon bit his lip.

"I'd like to bathe you. I've read before that a warm bath after lovemaking helps soothe the pain. And you should probably take some ibuprofen as well," He said tenderly. Tears sprang to Amy's eyes as she looked at him. The care and concern he was exhibiting left her breathless.

Sheldon himself was a virgin before this. No one could fault him for not knowing what he was doing before, during, and after. He had made the entire event so special and comfortable for her, that Amy realized with a sudden jolt that he had obviously read up on this. Her love for him only deepend.

"Alright," She whispered, following Sheldon as he walked through the suite holding onto to Amy's hand, flicking on the bathroom light to dim.

"Have a seat," He said, guiding her to the vanity bench as he busied himself with preparing the bath. He didn't have his bath thermometer, so he would have to wing it. He made it a tad warmer than normal, just in case. Unwrapping the bath bomb, which indeed smelled like vanilla heaven, he tossed it in and watched in delight as the water swirled with fragrance, bubbles, and color.

Amy watched him, smiling at his childlike wonder. He left the room for a moment to grab his toiletry bag, before returning with 2 pills and a bottle of water.

"Here," He said sweetly, offering her the analgesic. She took the pills, downing them quickly.

"Good girl," He whispered, taking the bottle from her and placing it on the counter. The large tub was almost filled, and he held his hand out to help her into it. Sliding the robe off of her body, his eyes followed its trail down to the floor. Then, he removed his own. He stepped into the water first, helping her over the side of the tub and lowering her gently as he sat behind her.

They sat there for an hour, Sheldon replenishing the hot water as needed as he washed her carefully, tenderly…rubbing her back and shoulders in slow, sensual strokes. His hands glided down to her stomach, easing the soreness. Around to her hips, where he carefully worked out any tension. He took her shoulders and pulled her back against his chest, exquisitely running his hands down her arms, up to her neck, down to her breasts, where he massaged them…never roughly and not trying to arouse her. Yet her nipples tightened in reply to his ministrations, and her legs began to move restlessly under the water.

"You smell heavenly. Like vanilla cookies," He murmured, sliding his lips across the point under Amy's ear.

Sheldon leaned further down kissing her neck, her throat, and the side of her cheek. He ran his lips over her ear, humming into it and delighting how her own hands dropped into the water and landed on his thighs. He tried not to get excited at her simple touch, but it was impossible. He felt his flesh harden, pressing into her lower back noticeably. Amy moaned lowly, sliding backward against him as he continued to caress her breasts. Finally, he couldn't resist any more. He stroked his fingers across her nipples, working them into even tighter peaks.

"How does that feel?" He asked her huskily, his thumbs rubbing repeatedly across her. Amy merely whimpered in response, causing him to increase his efforts.

"That good, hmm? He rasped, running his tongue along her earlobe. "And what about now. How do you like this?" He murmured, taking her between his thumb and forefinger and pinching her gently. Amy arched her back in pleasure. Sheldon smiled a slow, sexy smile.

"I may be wrong, but I'd say that's a yes." He said, moving his lips further down her throat. All the while, he didn't cease his fondling.

"That feels amazing, Sheldon. God…your touch is magical," She breathed, one of her hands on his leg beginning to moved back and forth. Sheldon swallowed deeply. He cupped her breasts, pulling her body even tighter against him so that she could feel his erection trapped between them.

"_You're_ amazing, Amy. Dear Lord…what you do to me. I can't even fathom it," He admitted roughly, his breathing choppy.

Suddenly, Amy reached forward, unplugging the stopper to the tub. She turned on the shower nozzle, pulling it out of its holder and rinsing she and Sheldon off quickly. She turned around, meeting his hungry gaze.

"Take me to bed, Sheldon." She said, her voice deep and husky.

Sheldon didn't need to be told twice.

Standing up carefully, he grabbed a towel and dried Amy off, picking up her robe and slipping it on to keep her warm as he dried off himself. She stood still, waiting for him to finish, meeting his gaze.

"I love you, Amy. You've made me so happy. I never thought I would be. I never thought I _wanted_ to be. But I was wrong. Can you believe that? Sheldon Cooper was wrong," He whispered tenderly, kissing her lips as softly as a feathers touch. Together they walked back to the bed, hand in hand.

"I don't care if you're wrong. I don't care if you're _right_. I just want you to not have any regrets," She said with feeling. Sheldon gasped as he turned her to face him.

"Never, Amy. I promise. We belong to each other, now. You can't take it back," He said with conviction. Amy's lips quivered.

Sheldon sat down first, scooting backward. Amy crawled on top of him, resting her weight on her elbows above him. Sheldon parted her robe, revealing her to his hungry eyes. He ran his fingers from her throat to her breasts, his eyes never straying from hers. The fact he could do this, _enjoy_ this…made him bold.

"Your body is gorgeous, do you know that? Every nook and cranny. Every dip and swell. You are 150 percent a woman. And I love every part of you. I always have," He said tenderly, his heart jumping at the pleasurable shock on her face. "I have wanted to touch you for so long. I thought…I was going crazy. That night, in my room when we played D&amp;D? It was all I could do not to drag you underneath me. I just wanted to touch you. And after knowing how much you wanted me back…I knew I was in serious trouble," He admitted.

Amy was speechless. This was too much. The culmination of years of longing coming to a head. She couldn't even articulate and answer.

"Oh, Sheldon…"

Pulling her closer, he buried his face in her neck and kissed her fragrant skin, nipping with his teeth and then soothing with his tongue. All the while Amy floated above her body, boneless and weightless. His fingers tremulously traced her ribs, one by one, sliding down over her womanly hips and around to her perfect posterior, before making the journey back up to her shoulders. Sheldon delighted that wherever he touched, goosebumps broke out.

Sliding the robe from her shoulders, he dragged it off of her and threw it somewhere in the vicinity of the floor. He glided his arms down her back, latching onto her rear and pulling her into his erection. Amy gasped as she felt his manhood brush against her stomach through his robe. Letting out a sharp moan, she reached down and parted his robe, taking him into her hand. He was hard, silky smooth, and all hers. He twitched in her hand, rotating his hips.

"Oh, Amy," He grunted, pulling back to meet her lust filled gaze. "Will this hedonistic feeling ever stop?" He ground out painfully, thrusting into her hand as she slid her thumb under his ridge and then over the tip. She kissed his chin, before running her moist lips over his without fully kissing him. It was highly erotic, and he watched her with hooded eyes as her tongue peeked out to lick where her lips just were.

"God, I hope not," Was her reply, as she took him fully in her hands, caressing him to the point of madness. She pumped him slowly, forming a tight fist and increasing the pressure. Sheldon gasped, his eyes flying open wider.

"Oh…Amy," He moaned, unable to comprehend the pleasure his brain was experiencing. Little did he know there was more pleasure to come.

Amy sat up, scooting down to his thighs so that his body was on full display for her. Sheldon gulped as she opened the belt of his robe, parting it completely and assisting him with removing it as he had done to hers. She allowed her eyes to roam over her man with undisguised hunger. This was the Sheldon Cooper no one would ever get to see or experience. _Just_ her. God…she was a lucky girl.

Sheldon threw his head back as Amy lowered her mouth to him, finally… kissing the tip before sliding her tongue down his hardness with torturous precision. All the while, her eyes seared into his, drawing his pleasure out even more. She came back up, kissing the head like she would his mouth; taking it in her mouth and sucking gently.

"Oh. Oh," He moaned, uncertain as to whether he were dreaming or not. The pleasure was intense, the feelings and emotion behind it unreal. Suddenly, Amy pulled away and met his stunned gaze. He looked half crazed; his eyes were glazed and nearly black.

"Do you…have any idea how many times I imagined this? Even before I loved you, Sheldon, I wanted you. I tried to deny it; I told you in the beginning that physical intimacy wasn't what I wanted. For the most part, that was true. Until I met you and realized, I was in trouble. You were handsome, and the fact you didn't even know it was the most potent aphrodisiac. Just sitting next to you was torture. The way you've always looked in my eyes, was torture. Now that I have your permission to touch you, I think _you_ are the one in trouble," She warned, as her mouth engulfed him completely.

His length hit the back of Amy's throat, the warm tightness there reminding him of being inside of her. He could hardly think straight at what this felt like to him, let alone formulate a sentence in reply to her confession. When her fingers pressed on his perineum, Sheldon nearly bolted up off of the bed.

"Oh, my…damn," He choked out, giving up all pretense of being a Homo Novus. Where this language was coming from, he had no idea. He was reduced to what he truly was, what we all are…an animal, clawing to get out of the prison society had placed him in.

She sucked with languid, deep strokes, using her hands to aide her along. While Amy had pleasured him before with her hands, it was different this time- _much_ different. She drew him in deeper, her tongue swirling his tip as her fingers caressed his testicles. Good lord… he was going to shatter into a million pieces. He tried to push her away because of the intensity, but at the same time his hands landed in her hair to coax her further. He felt lost in a sea of sensation.

"Amy…w-what…" He tried to say, his voice high and raspy. "Please."

Ignoring his pleas, Amy continued her efforts, relaxing her throat and allowing him to slide further in. Sheldon thrashed underneath her, moaning in complete abandon.

"What are you doing to me?" He whimpered, his eyes rolling back in his head as she bobbed up and down quickly. It was a rhetorical question, at best. Not that he expected Amy to answer given the current circumstances. His hips of their own accord pumped up to meet her strokes, and he felt an almost depraved kind of longing.

"Yes. Yes, god don't stop. Please," He begged, and was nearly rendered catatonic when she hummed, the vibration sending shock waves through his body. Sheldon cried out, one hand falling limply to the bed while the other ran through her silky hair. Her teeth grazed him gently as her lips stretched back and forth over his taut flesh.

"Amy…yes. Good lord…so good," He bellowed, feeling his orgasm rising quickly, too quickly…how had his innocent Amy learned to _do_ something like this. It was so …_dirty_ \- so sexy and dangerous. He felt a momentary fear that she had done this before. It made his blood boil, but he immediately pushed that thought away. He tried to focus on her ministrations, watching her as to never forget how she looked in this moment. Bad idea…the sight of his hardness engulfed in her mouth was his undoing. The pleasure was too strong, bubbling up from deep inside of him. He tried to tap her head, to alert her to move, but she wouldn't budge.

"Amy…I'm…" He tried, and she sped up her movements. What was she doing? Did she actually…_want_ him to finish this way? Dear god in heaven…his suspicions were confirmed when Amy reached underneath him, grabbing his hips to secure him.

Sheldon let loose a loud wail, feeling as though his entire body and soul was levitated to another plane. He should have been terrified at this level of rapture, but he could no longer care. The shock he felt was quickly overridden by his pleasure. It was beyond his control now…he weakly pumped his hips, helpless as the ecstasy tore through him fiercely. For a brief moment, it was like staring into the heavens and getting a glimpse of paradise. Sheldon couldn't breathe, see, or hear anything over the roaring in his ears or the blood pumping through his heart.

"Jesus Christ," He cried, scrubbing his hands across his eyes. Amy never released him through it all. She was watching him with adoration. To see her man, this man…this man in _particular_…giving up his tightly knit control for her was exciting beyond measure. She felt powerful and beautiful and in possession of a precious and priceless gift.

Coming back to himself, Sheldon rolled them so they were on their sides. He was breathing harshly through his nose and mouth, staring at her like she was his last meal. Amy thrilled at his glassy, unfocused eyes and how his lips were wet and swollen. Everything about him was entirely too delicious.

"Where…did you learn the skills to do that," He asked, his voice low and quiet.

Amy stared at him in confusion, eyes widening. She assuaged his fears immediately.

"I…well, I'm a Scientist Sheldon. I know everything about anatomy and physiology. I just did what I knew you would enjoy. I've done extensive research on erogenous zones. The body is designed-…"

Her words were halted as his mouth covered hers in a passionate kiss. He stole her breath away with the intensity of it, his tongue plunging in her mouth with sensual abandon. He bit her lip roughly, the action causing her to cry out in pleasure and pain. He took the opportuntiy to suck her tongue into his mouth.

Amy had never seen Sheldon so out of control before. It was as though she released a beast inside of him. She wished she wasn't so sore from their joining earlier. Wetness flooded her further, and she moaned at how swollen she felt.

Sheldon caressed her lovingly, mapping out her body as though she were ancient script he was eager to decipher. Her skin was so damn soft; how had he gone so long without the simple bliss of knowing how her skin felt? How had he refused to allow her to touch him in return?

Sheldon cursed his folly. What a terrible fool he had been. He slid his hand down to her womanhood, finding her drenched. He roughly tore his mouth away from hers, staring deeply into her eyes.

"You…" He began, only to be cut off by Amy.

"Yes…you did this. Pleasuring you makes me so aroused, Sheldon. I love doing it. And just now…" She sighed, unable to hide _how_ aroused he made her, allowing her to pleasure him so deeply. She had been afraid to try that maneuver on him, not knowing how it would go over. She was happy to say, it met with Sheldon's approval.

His eyes slid down her body, then back up to hers. The question there was clear. He was rather large, and she _was_ sore. But there was more than one way to skin a cat. Sheldon kissed his way down her body, stopping to give her breasts his full attention. They were sore as well, but she didn't care. Nothing mattered but this sweet ache he was fostering in her body. When he reached her most secret place, he gave pause. He wanted to devour her whole, and the feeling scared the hell out of him. She smelled absolutely delectable; like Vanilla and Amy. Sinful and sweet. Heady. Delicious.

What had she done to him? He wasn't thinking clearly. He couldn't say the feeling was entirely bad. But he was not used to feeling so out of control. He didn't want to hurt her.

"Amy…I want you to keep your eyes on mine. Don't look away," He beseeched.

At first, Amy thought it was his way of dominating her. When she saw the fear in his eyes, she realized it was because he wanted her to ground him.

"Alright," She answered, and he lowered his mouth to her tenderly. Lovingly.

"You are so…aroused," He mumbled in wonder, kissing and nibbling her relentlessly. He wanted to make love to her more than he wanted air. It was so hard to restrain himself - so he poured every ounce of want into making her sing. Sheldon's eyes darkened further as they locked with hers. This was his new favorite thing, pleasuring Amy this way. Knowing his love for repetition, he was certain he'd perfect it in no time. And then he would keep trying to better the results.

"You should know something, Dr. Fowler," He began, his deep voice dripping sensuality. "I have always wanted the same thing you did. As you imagined me, I imagined you. Many a night I lay in my bed, especially after date night, having to use kolinahr and meditation to calm myself down. You weren't alone, Amy. You were never alone. I couldn't admit it to myself. But I can now. I want to know every secret part of you, inside and out. It's mine. _You_ are mine."

At that, Amy's body coiled and she grabbed Sheldon's hair, twisting it tightly in her grip as her orgasm washed over her. They crashed back to earth in a tumble of limbs.

"Oh, god Sheldon. I love you," She shrieked, and he smiled with male pride and intense love. He held her close all night, not letting her go.

It was quite simply the best night of Sheldon's life.

Now, as morning arrived and reality set in, he felt no less happy. No less certain. He could easily envision himself waking up this way next to her for the rest of his life.

Amy stirred, her eyes slipping open and focusing on Sheldon in confusion. A slow smile spread across her face, reaching her eyes. He smiled back.

"Am I dreaming?" She asked, and Sheldon pulled her closer.

"No, Amy. You are quite fully awake. Do you know what time it is?" He admonished her tartly, sounding like nothing particular had happened that was out of the ordinary.

Amy pulled back, eyeing him curiously. The smile he repressed couldn't be contained, and Amy lightly punched his shoulder.

"You had better kiss me good morning before I hide your toothbrush. I know how you get when you can't perform your morning ablutions." She said saucily. He narrowed his eyes at her.

"Amy…we are at a world class resort. Don't you think they can bring me a toothbrush?" He asked, pointing out the obvious.

Not one to be gainsaid, she sat up and narrowed her own eyes at him.

"Didn't I tell you? They are all out of toothbrushes here." She deadpanned.

Sheldon smirked at her. "Is that a fact?"

"Yes…they're experiencing a fluke toothbrush shortage. Sorry. And you can't borrow mine, either. So…" she puckered up dramatically.

"Well…if needs must," He whispered, kissing her gently on the lips and then lifting up to place a kiss on the tip of her nose.

"Good morning, Dr. Fowler. I trust you slept well?" He questioned, the challenge in his voice apparent. Amy smiled at him adoringly.

"Yes, Dr. Cooper. I slept very well. And you?"

Sheldon rolled his eyes.

"If I had slept any better, I would be dead. And I'm experiencing the strangest hunger again. I could eat a whole cow right now." He said in wonder.

Amy laughed at the silliness in Sheldon's voice. Post sex Sheldon was scrumptious. She relished the fact they had the rest of their lives now to enjoy this feeling.

"Shall we order room service again?" She questioned, sitting up and reaching for the menu. Sheldon thought about it a moment before shaking his head in the negative.

"No…I'd like to take you out and show you off. As lovely as this suite is, how does some fresh air sound? Besides…checkout is in two hours. We should shower and pack.

Amy nodded, the prospect of sunshine and fresh air appealing to her very much.

"That sounds wonderful. I will check the area online for suitable restaurants", She said, getting out of bed. Sheldon nodded his eyes glued to her lovely body. The fact she was nude didn't even bother her. It certainly didn't bother Sheldon. He came up behind her to wrap his arms around her.

"Would you join me in a shower after?" He asked quietly, and Amy turned around, her eyes catching his.

"I…do you want me to?" She asked, and Sheldon crinkled his brows.

"Of course I want you to. I'm not ready to let you out of my sight yet. If ever," He said truthfully, and suddenly the words hung in the air above them like a gigantic question mark.

They stared at each other, searching each other's eyes. Exactly what he was implying, she wasn't sure. But Amy was intelligent enough to know that whatever it was, she had to let him lead her. She wouldn't assume anything or jump to conclusions. Right now, a shower and brunch was the order of the day. She smiled lightly, diffusing the tension.

"I'll shower with you on one condition. You don't steal all the body wash, _and_ you wash my hair."

Sheldon smiled. "That's two conditions," He pointed out.

"Oh, and no funny business," She said in jest ignoring his reprimand, and earning a mock laugh out of him.

"Then what's the point? And, that is three conditions. Surely, such a highly evolved being such as yourself can count?" He questioned.

Amy eyed him with shrewdness. "Have I created a monster here?" She asked, gently poking him in the chest. He glanced down to her finger, before his eyes met hers. His smoldering gaze nearly made her faint.

"Oh…I can count as well, Dr. Fowler. For instance, you know I love the number 3. It just so happens that you experienced 3 orgasms last night," He whispered sexily, enjoying the way her mouth fell open in surprise.

"Thank you for pointing that out," She murmured, further enthralled when he reached around her back and pulled her naked body close to his. Amy gasped.

"My pleasure. Truly," He whispered, shocking her when he reached down and swatted her behind gently.

Amy's eyes widened comically.

"I've wanted to do that _forever_," He admitted, drawing out the last word. Amy couldn't help it. She giggled.

"Really now…Interesting," She said, loving the shy smile Sheldon gave her before releasing her and sauntering, naked, to the bathroom.

Good grief, she thought as she watched his perfect posterior move. She _was_ in big trouble.

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True to his word, albeit difficult, there was no funny business. They showered with business like moves, exiting the shower in under twenty minutes. This was an activity Sheldon wanted to revisit over and over again. But they were on a schedule, and time constraints couldn't be helped.

However…the sight of naked, wet Amy with her glossy hair trailing down her back, her nipples pebbled due to the cool water of the shower, and her wet eyelashes fluttering enticingly as her eyes roamed appreciatively over his body made him want to take her against the tiles.

Repeatedly.

Alas…there were no adhesive ducks in this particular shower. It was not meant to be.

Sheldon surprised Amy by wearing a powder blue button down polo shirt with a pair of cream pleated trousers. What further shocked her, was that he had chosen loafers…without socks. Rolling up his sleeves to the elbows to reveal his strong forearms, he looked like he had just walked off the runway at a J Crew fashion show. She shook her head, eyeing her boyfriend.

Sheldon attracted Amy in every way. Even though he was quirky and dressed in superhero t shirts most of the time, she didn't mind. It was his style, what he was most comfortable in. But she couldn't deny when he dressed up in attire that was tailored, he looked devastatingly handsome. Other than his normal attire yesterday at Disneyland, he had dressed up for her this weekend in clothing that left her reeling. He looked so…manly.

She had done numerous drug studies in her work as a Neuroscientist; she knew the human and primate brain inside and out. She likened her reactions to Sheldon as getting a dose of heroin. It immediately woke up the central nervous system, spreading warmth and euphoria through her entire body. She lived for her next fix on tenterhooks, breathless and addicted. He seemed oblivious to the effect he had on her, which made him all the more desirable. The drug was never to blame for its effect on the addict, after all.

Amy had never known a man like Sheldon. Genius IQ aside, he possessed a childlike innocence about him that she found highly appealing. He didn't need to spray the place with testosterone; a real man doesn't need to proclaim it. His actions and interactions are what promote it. For all of his selfish, self- centered deeds she'd witnessed over the years, she was certain underneath it all, Sheldon possessed the heart of a true gentleman. He'd proven to her time and again his devotion to her, and his willingness to change. It wasn't always easy, but she loved him enough to wait while he worked out his issues. After all, she had a few issues of her own to contend with.

Putting the finishing touches on her makeup, she exited the bathroom, rolling her carry case with her. Sheldon stood up from the couch, helping her gather her belongings to put alongside his in the foyer.

"The concierge has made arrangements to have your bouquet packed for shipping. They picked it up while you were getting dressed. Shall we go?" He asked, his voice quiet. Amy smiled, putting her hand on his cheek. His eyes met hers, and for some reason, his looked troubled. Amy's face fell.

"Sheldon, what is it?"

He shook his head, gathering his bottom lip inside his mouth. Amy waited for him to elaborate.

"Amy, I…I don't want to lose what we found here in this room this weekend. I don't want things to change once we return to Pasadena." He whispered, his tone frightened.

Amy studied him. He looked so much like the Sheldon she knew and fell in love with. Unsure, scared, and childlike.

"Sheldon…we won't. I promise. We've turned a corner here. It will be alright. Do you trust me?"

Sheldon nodded.

"Of course I trust you. It's just…How can I compete in the real world with what's happened here?"

So that was it. Sheldon was worried that once back in his comfort zone, he would resort to his 'old' mindset. Amy smiled at him sweetly, running her fingers across his cheek.

"Hey…I know this weekend has been magical, like a fairy tale. And tomorrow is Monday and the reality of life will settle back in. But I'll love you no less. You'll love me no less. It's not the room that did this. It's not the time away. It's not even the magic of Disneyland," She said humorously, smiling at the twinkle in his eyes. "It's us, Sheldon. You and I. _We_ created this magic. We just have to keep doing what we've done right so far. It will be fine. _Better_ than fine," She promised, stroking his cheek.

Sheldon nodded. He had no other recourse but to believe her. Amy was always right. That thought made him proud and he smiled.

Together they walked hand in hand out of the suite, and Sheldon felt much better about where they were headed. As they turned to shut the door, each looked back inside the room savoring the memories one last time, before looking at each other.

No words needed to be said. There weren't any that could do justice, anyway.

They ended up having brunch in Huntington Beach, enjoying the beautiful autumn day. The day was sunny so Amy suggested they find a place by the water. The hostess seated them, Sheldon pulling out her chair for her to sit. The gesture touched Amy deeply. A few months ago, Sheldon would never have thought to do this. It was like he was a totally different person; still her Sheldon, but a 2.0 version. She thanked him for his manners and he smiled at her warmly while removing his sunglasses.

Amy admired the way his blue eyes twinkled as he looked around. The color shirt really brought the hue of his eyes out; Amy made a mental note to buy him more shirts in at least 12 different shades of blue. She loved him in blue. She would forever associate Sheldon with that color. She wasn't sure why; she hadn't ever really done so before. After her illness, whenever she saw the shade, Sheldon instantly came to her mind.

Strange, she thought.

"Ooh, Amy look…they have a Belgium waffle station!" Sheldon professed, smiling widely. It was contagious as Amy laughed at his exuberance. He bounced in his seat in excitement.

After perusing the menu, she put it down and took a sip of water.

"I think I'll have a mimosa. Would you like to join me in one?" She asked.

Sheldon thought about it a moment. While he wasn't thrilled at drinking alcohol, one mimosa didn't sound so bad. And it _was_ fresh squeezed orange juice, he noticed as there was a large juicer by the buffet table.

"I think I _will_ join you in one, yes," He answered briskly, and Amy smiled.

They sat back, enjoying the views and each other's company. The waiter brought their drinks, and they each took a sip.

Sheldon looked over at his companion, his eyes softening as he took her in. She looked breathtaking this morning. Her skin glowed, her hair shined, and her eyes sparkled. While he never minded her cardigans, he was pleased she was beginning to dress in a way that showed off her lovely curves.

She was a young woman in the prime of her life. She should feel desirable, because that's what she was: desired. He studied the way her long hair curled around her shoulders, falling beneath her breasts. She had chosen to wear a short sleeved sundress today, the pink color so pretty against her fair skin. Sheldon smiled at her, basking in her beauty.

"Why are you staring at me like that," She asked softly, taking a sip of her mimosa. Shyly, Sheldon bowed his head.

"If I told you, you would think I needed my head examined." He said with self-deprecation.

Amy smiled, certain it wasn't as bad as that.

"Come on, Sheldon. What is it? I promise not to laugh. Besides…whatever it is, it can't be the worst thing you've ever told me."

Sheldon debated whether or not he should say anything. In the end, he decided not to keep any secrets.

"It's just that you look so pretty this morning. I have never allowed myself to be proud of the fact you are a beautiful woman, Amy. Maybe consummating our relationship has awakened that male pride in me that was long dormant. I don't know the reasons…but you continue to amaze me, Amy Farrah Fowler. Why am I suddenly cognizant of any man within a fifty mile radius staring at you?"

Amy stared at Sheldon with soft eyes. She knew he spoke nothing but the truth at all times; Sheldon Cooper was not one to mince words. His stark frankness made her realize just how much Sheldon truly cared for her.

"You amaze me just the same, Sheldon. I am very proud you are my boyfriend. I always have been," She said honestly. Sheldon blushed, taking a large gulp of his mimosa. "And trust me…the feeling is mutual. If you only knew how many women around us, real and imagined that I have been jealous of over the years, you'd laugh at _me_."

Sheldon nodded, turning his gaze to the sun capped water. The thing was, he would _never_ laugh at her. Not now. It made him swell with delight to know she was territorial with him. It made him feel wanted. Mature.

Like a man.

This newfound intimacy between them was so wonderful. Was it normal to want to do nothing but bask in her beauty, touch her skin, kiss her lips and share her body? Perhaps he _did_ have to have his head examined.

They spent the day walking on the beach, window shopping at the quaint beachside shops, and eating junk food. By the time they got on the expressway to make the journey home, the sun was low in the sky and the air held a rosy hue. They enjoyed the ride back, making small talk and smiling at one another.

"What are your plans this evening, if any?" Sheldon ventured, and Amy glanced over at his expectant face. It was nearly 8 pm and they were nearing Los Robles Avenue. Amy was already feeling the loneliness of leaving him settling in. For all they had discussed this weekend, all they had done…the one thing they were still uncertain of was where did they go from here? What was the social protocol for a couple after consummating their relationship in a sexual way? Did she drop him off at the curb with a 'Thanks, Sailor', or did he come back to her apartment for another night of passion? Amy felt her heart begin to race at his simple, benign question.

"Amy…Well?" He ventured softly, startling her.

"Um…I don't know. I hadn't thought about that," She answered honestly. "I suppose, go home and prepare for work tomorrow."

Sheldon shook his head slowly, his eyes never leaving her. An awkward silence suddenly descended over them, and Sheldon felt his pulse begin to speed up. As Amy came to a stop in front of Sheldon's building, he reached over and took her hand gently in his own. Amy looked at him in silent inquiry.

Sheldon took a deep breath, blowing it out.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" He asked her quietly, searching her face for any clues as to her thoughts. He knew he sounded like a hippie. He must have looked like a lost puppy. He didn't care.

Amy licked her lips; finding her voice was difficult.

"I would like that, Sheldon. Are you sure?"

In answer, Sheldon pulled her closer until she had effectively slid over the console onto his lap. He kissed her soundly, intoxicated by her all over again.

"I'm very sure," He whispered, not giving her time to answer before kissing her again.

Sheldon discovered that he could get used to this.

"Sheldon," She sighed, as he kissed a path from her chin to her ear. Shivers moved up and down her spine at the feeling of his silky lips. "Are you _really_ sure?" She asked again, needing to know.

Sheldon pulled back, his eyes glassy as they stared at her.

"I want you in my bed tonight, Amy. I want my sheets to smell like you," He admitted, huskily. What was she to say?

"Alright."

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After an awkward greeting with Leonard and Penny upon arriving at 4A, and their hasty exit to Penny's apartment after they inquired about their weekend, Amy found herself alone in Sheldon's room. He had exited to take a shower, leaving Amy staring at the wall. Her mind wandered back over the last two days, and she turned crimson red as she remembered everything.

While Sheldon was timid before, especially with her being in his bedroom, he wasn't anymore. If anything, he was possessive and assertive, demanding she wait for him in here and not in the living room. She figured that he didn't want Penny badgering her about their weekend, and she smiled at his thoughtfulness.

Upon his arrival back to his room, she told Sheldon she was going to have a shower herself. He simply nodded, his eyes burning a path up her body that left her singed and hot all over. It was all she could do to push herself to the bathroom, wheeling her case behind her. Foregoing her normal bath items, Amy decided to use Sheldon's. It was devastatingly intimate to know she smelled like him.

Drying off as quickly as she could, she decided to wear the baby doll nightie she bought for the weekend, yet never got a chance to wear. Not that she was complaining about that...

It was short and sheer, showcasing her body in a very revealing way. She didn't know how she ever had the courage to buy such a garment, let alone wear it. But after all they shared this weekend, she was no longer afraid.

Returning to his room, she found him staring out the window lost in thought. He had on a white t- shirt and a pair of black silk boxers. They were the one's Amy had borrowed that night she stayed over the first time. Amy's eyes widened at how the shirt fit snugly across his chest.

Hoo…he made her blood sizzle and she released a gasp.

He stared at her dumbly, his eyes tracing her curves in the short piece of lingerie. Good lord, she was going to be the death of him. After endless moments of silent perusal, Amy grew worried it was not to his liking.

"I bought this for the weekend…just in case. I couldn't wear it last night because of the massage and well…you know," She whispered, not having to elaborate. Just the mention of the massage and what happened afterwards made Sheldon's heart race. He snapped out of his stupor, licking his lips in a move Amy found all too sensual for his limited sexual repertoire.

"Come here," He commanded, his voice soft and shaking with heavy arousal. The sound of it made Amy quiver. She was not used to Sheldon speaking to her in such a way, laced with obvious want. It would take some getting used to.

Again, not that she was complaining.

The nightie was pink and sheer, leaving little to the imagination. And for a man with an eidetic memory, Sheldon Cooper could imagine quite a bit. His imagination was nothing compared to the reality of her, though. Standing in his bedroom nearly nude, flushed and wanting him. He reached out to trace her collarbones, thrilling as he glanced down and noticed her nipples hardening in response to his touch.

"You can't hide your reaction to me, Dr. Fowler," He whispered throatily, his voice sounding strained in the semi darkness. He traced a lone finger downwards, making contact with a swollen bud. Amy gasped, stepping up a pace closer to him.

"I'm not trying to, Dr. Cooper," She answered bravely - more bravely than she felt. The way he was looking at her left her feeling exposed and vulnerable. Perhaps that was what she wanted. Perhaps that was _his_ intention.

"Vixen," He ground out, wrapping his arm around her waist and yanking her against him roughly. When his mouth met hers in a fierce kiss, she wasn't backing down. Oh no. She gave as good as she got, wrapping her arm around his back and sliding down to squeeze his ass. Sheldon's breath hitched in his throat as his erection rubbed against her silk covered core.

"Amy," He moaned, throwing his head back as Amy bucked against him. "You…are you…last night," He gasped, and Amy realized what he was asking her.

"I'm better. I'm alright. I want you Sheldon. So much, please."

To drive home her point, she slid against him again, hitching her leg up and around his leg.

"Oh, god. I didn't ask you to stay for this. I swear. But…I need you, Amy. Are you sure?" He asked, and she was touched he was putting aside his needs to make certain she was alright. Amy nodded her head, running her nose up the side of his neck while placing tender kisses there.

"Yes, Sheldon. I need you too."

Her confirmation was all Sheldon needed to hear. He dragged her the short distance to his bed, laying down and pulling her on top of him.

"Mmm…you smell so good, Amy. You smell like me," He whispered, the very truth of his words causing his arousal to increase.

Amy smiled, nuzzling Sheldon's cheek with her own.

"I wanted to. In fact…I may take home that talc you use and sprinkle it on my bed so I can have you there, even when you're not."

Her simple statement caused Sheldon's breath to hitch. He never appreciated before the fact that Amy wanted him. Loved him. Cared for him. The fact that this incredible woman wanted only him…left him nearly paralyzed with joy. He wanted to cry. He wanted to shout out how happy she made him. He was _truly_ a hippy now…

Amy sat up, running her hands across Sheldon's chest before she reached for the hem of his shirt. He let her pull it over his head and discard it. He stared at her in silence for a moment, thrilling at her soft body on view for his eyes to feast upon. She made to move off of him, but he stilled her hips. Amy looked at Sheldon in question.

"I want you, just like this. I want you to be in control this time. I want to watch you as you make love to me. I've wanted this for so long, Amy. Longer than I can even admit," He said passionately.

Amy was stunned at Sheldon's sensual words, speechless as he reached up and gently took the banding of her panties and began to lower them. She took the hint and lifted up, pulling off the scrap of silk and dropping it on the floor. She went to raise her arms, when Sheldon stopped her, his large hand on her waist.

"No. Leave the nightie on," He implored, his voice pure sex. He lifted his hips, pulling his own boxers off. He reached over to the nightstand, opening a drawer and grabbing a condom with shaking hands.

Oh, my…kinky Dr. Cooper has come out to play. Amy didn't know whether to be frightened. She watched as he slowly rolled the latex on his arousal, her heart hammering against her ribs. For a few seconds they sat there as they were, panting and eyeing each other. He brought his hand back to her waist.

"Are you-…" He asked tentatively, not sure how to ask her what he needed to know. But Amy knew, her eyes warmly gazing at him.

"I'm_ more_ than ready, Sheldon," She assured him, and he touched her gently. His fingers met her warm arousal and he groaned.

"You are always ready for me, Amy. Never stop. Please," His voice softly commanded. Amy could only nod helplessly as he took hold of her waist and guided her down onto his erection. It was unbearably _good_.

When Sheldon was fully sheathed inside of her, they both cried out in pleasure. He was perfectly still, allowing her body once again to adjust to the invasion. This position was so much more intense for Amy; she could feel every bit of Sheldon inside of her.

"You feel so…perfect." Amy whined, sliding forward and back over him, lifting up and coming back down.

'Oh, Amy," He said in reverence, the urge to close his eyes strong. He fought to keep them open, though. He needed to see her. Amy moved her hips in a circle, unsure of how to do this. Instinct went a long way towards helping her, but she wasn't certain she was doing it right.

"Sheldon, is this…good for you?" She managed, the feel of him filling her overwhelming. He felt so good, and this position was stimulating her beyond what she thought possible.

Good? He thought, his mind in a tangle. Dear god, if it got any better he would be exploding in a matter of seconds. Sheldon moaned loudly.

"It's perfect. Oh, god, _you're _perfect," He cried, giving in and closing his eyes.

Amy sped up her movements, raising up and slamming down on him roughly. Sheldon's eyes popped back open, focusing on her in a daze. Amy had one hand on his chest, keeping her stationary while the other was stroking her clitoris. He could feel her fingers sliding over him as he met her strokes.

The sight of his woman, pleasuring herself while she rode him was shockingly erotic. Her breasts bounced invitingly inside their wire enclosure, and Sheldon couldn't take it anymore.

"That's it. Yes, Amy. Take what you need," He chanted, his hands not willing to remain idle. They reached up, pulling out her breasts from the prison they were encased it. The pink of the nightie contrasted with her skin beautifully. Sheldon wanted to devour her. She literally made his mouth water.

"You feel so good, Sheldon. God. So good." She cried, her eyes shutting tightly.

He bucked up into her, setting a deep rhythm. Their guttural groans bounced off the walls. Sheldon reached over and assisted her, caressing her tender nub, spellbound at the sight of him disappearing inside of her again and again.

Their fingers intertwined as they stroked together; a tangle of wetness and hardness.

"Open your eyes, Amy. I want to see your eyes," He said forcefully.

"I can't….it's too much," She whimpered, feeling her G spot stimulated by his length which was hitting her perfectly.

"Open them, please." He ordered softly, his gentle hand on her hip securing her to him tightly.

"Sheldon…" She moaned, moving with him in languid, deep strokes. It was slow, tender, and maddening. Her body was so tense, and when she heeded his command, her breath left her in a gasp at the utter adoration she saw reflected back at her.

"I love you, Amy. I love you so much. I didn't mean to make you wait so long. I was scared. I was so scared…." He trailed off, his body torn between absolute pleasure and his heart torn in pain. He had been so selfish. Whether out of fear or pride…it didn't matter now. All that mattered was that he could no longer imagine his life without her, his bed without her. He was losing control, and he no longer cared.

"Sheldon...I love you so much." Amy moaned, and Sheldon reached his limit. Flipping them over, still joined, he thrust into her with deep, rhythmic strokes.

"Oh!" He bellowed, the word bouncing off the walls of his room and increasing his lust. His wild eyes met Amy's in the semi darkness, the passion she felt reflected back at him and making him dizzy.

"You. Are. Mine," He whimpered brokenly, reaching around her back to bring her closer to him as their lower bodies continued to dance erratically. Amy could only wheeze and nod, too wrapped up in the delicious sensations he was evoking in her.

"Yours, Sheldon. Only yours," She affirmed, bending her knees and wrapping a muscular leg around his hip which only served in pulling him in deeper. Amy flung her hands behind her, grabbing Sheldon's headboard. The picture she presented, wanton and spread out for his feasting eyes, pushed Sheldon over the edge. He thrusted wildly, feeling her body tense around his and suddenly the world stopped spinning as he, in turn, followed her into the abyss.

Several moments later, after Sheldon came back to his senses and confirmed he wasn't in fact dead, he raised his heavy head to look down at the woman beneath him. Amy was still shaking from the aftershocks of their mating, her body trembling in the most enticing way. A slow, lazy smile graced his lips and he bent down to kiss the tender skin of her jaw, her neck, the slope of her breast. Amy shuddered, feeling the light stubble of his jaw raking across her delicate skin. He pulled her closer, turning them sideways and he held her tightly. Amy began to drift off when Sheldon whispered in her ear, the delicate sound somehow sounding loud in the dark room.

"Amy…Leonard will be moving out soon."

She opened her eyes and looked at him in the darkness, not saying anything. She nodded instead.

"I'll be living alone for the first time ever."

Again, Amy nodded, watching his every nuance.

"I'm not afraid to live alone. And I don't really need someone here just to babysit me," He said quietly.

This time, Amy agreed.

"I know that, Sheldon." She said tenderly. "You'll be fine." She reassured him, not understanding where he was headed with this conversation.

"Things have changed." He stated, his voice resigned. A few days ago, that statement would have scared her. Somehow, it didn't.

"They have," She affirmed, running her hand across his chest lovingly. Sheldon halted the movement, taking her hand and bringing it to his lips. He kissed each finger.

"I'm glad," He whispered, tears clogging his throat.

What he couldn't tell her, couldn't voice without fear of falling apart, was that he was ready. He wanted to share his home with Amy. He wanted to share everything. The last few days opened his eyes to a great many things.

Those things he feared for so long, like losing his intellect and succumbing to his base urges like a common man, were unfounded. He'd never felt smarter, clearer, or more in tune with his thoughts than he was right how. He just felt so incredibly…_happy_.

"Me too," She murmured, her head resting on his chest. Sheldon pulled her as close as he could, knowing he would never push her away again.

And just like that, Sheldon Cooper _really_ became a man.

A/N- Thank you for reading. I told you that something BIG was happening to this couple. It has arrived. Next chapter to me, is the most important one of all. I've been asked if it's a baby. Would that it were SO simple. :) No, not a baby. At least, not yet. It's a bit more complicated than that. Just know, it was my intent all along to write this story with this twist, and I sincerely hope you enjoy it. It draws the story together, bringing it back to basepoint. Not to worry; No death. No breakup. Nothing bad. Only something beautiful. Stars are aligning. Stay tuned. X


	36. Chapter 36

~Chapter 36~

A/N - See me down below. After you've read the chapter, of course.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Accepting all I've done and said. I want to stand and stare again. Til there's nothing left out- oh, oh, oh…that remains there in your eyes. Whatever comes and goes…I will hear your silent call. And I will touch this tender wall, til I know I'm home again. In your eyes, the light the heat- your eyes, I am complete- your eyes, I see the doorway to a thousand churches- the resolution, of all my fruitless searching. Oh, I see the light and the heat. Oh, I want to be that complete. I want to touch the light the heat I see in your eyes…. Peter Gabriel – In Your Eyes (Live)

As it turned out, Sheldon's fears of losing the intimacy he and Amy had found over their weekend together were unfounded. Not only did their intimacy increase, it did so in the sweetest of ways.

When they had awoken that Monday morning, wrapped together in Sheldon's blankets, he took one look at Amy and knew everything would be fine. _Better_ than fine. What they shared had carried over to their home turf. It _wasn't_ just the hotel room, as Amy had pointed out. His eyes raked her up and down, adorably disheveled and looking like a goddess in that nightie, and he allowed the tears that had sprung to his eyes to spill over.

He had made love to his Amy. And he did it _well_.

He walked into work feeling like a million dollars. He knew he was glowing, and he knew the guys were privy as to why. No one said a word at lunch, other than Howard stating outright that Sheldon looked very happy and must have enjoyed the weekend. He could only smile, dipping his spoon into his frozen yogurt and swirling out the perfect spoonful.

It was impossible for him not to drift off at times; remembering their weekend and the way she made him feel. The way she touched him. The way she _loved_ him. He broke out in chills just thinking of it. He had always sensed that underneath Amy's clinical exterior was a hot blooded woman. For years, he'd fought to keep that woman restrained, using his sarcasm to thwart any attempt on her part to let her out. Thank the Lord, he had come to his senses.

Coming back to his office, he set up his boards and stood back to survey his work. Everything looked so _clear_. He shook his head. Why hadn't he seen this before? His field of study suddenly morphed into something amazingly titillating. Endless possibilities awaited him, and he couldn't wait to get down to business.

A quiet knock startled him out of his zone.

"Come in," He said briskly, not bothering to turn around.

"Alright. Time's up. What gives?" Howard asked in impatience.

He turned around to find Leonard, Howard, and Raj standing there with expectant faces, their arms crossed. Sheldon narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"Times up? For what?" He asked, not comprehending his meaning. Howard rolled his eyes while Raj giggled.

"The timer attached to the man code about spilling your guts after a hot weekend with your girlfriend. A _very_ hot weekend, if you get my drift," Howard ventured, lifting his brows. Sheldon stared at each man in turn, finally understanding. He bit his bottom lip and sighed.

"I wasn't aware of any man code. Besides…that's private. I don't…kiss and tell," He pouted, turning back to his boards. Howard whined in frustration.

"Uh, uh…you _have_ to tell us, Sheldon. If something happened, we as your friends want to share your joy. It is just how it's done," Howard chuffed. Sheldon wasn't convinced.

"I seem to remember a lot of tasteless chatter about your conquests over the years. I will not subject my girlfriend to such flagrant disrespect," Sheldon said seriously. Leonard smiled softly at his friend. That was all the confirmation he needed.

"So…something _did_ happen. Sheldon…we're your best friends. We wouldn't tease you about this, not anymore, after everything that's happened. We're just…curious. Did the weekend go well, or not?" Leonard asked gently.

Sheldon came and sat at his desk, looking off into the distance.

_Well?_ It went light years beyond well.

"It…did. It was very special. For both of us. Can we just leave it at that? Please?" He begged, his face open and pleading.

The guys relented, looking at one another with incredulity. Sheldon Cooper had lost his V card. And he seemed pretty damn happy about it.

"That's amazing, Sheldon. We're very happy for you. Aren't we, guys?" Leonard asked, Howard and Raj agreeing enthusiastically.

Sheldon swallowed, nodding his head.

"So…We'll just, leave you to it, then," Howard said, giving Sheldon a thumbs up. The meaning lost on Sheldon, he hesitantly returned the gesture, giving Howard and unsure smile. Raj followed Howard out of the office, but he turned around and gave Sheldon a tearful smile. Sheldon's eyes widened comically.

"It's so…beautiful," Raj gushed, making his way out. Sheldon rolled his eyes.

"Brother…" He said dramatically. Looking up, he met Leonard's amused face. It was laced with something new. Respect, maybe? Sheldon swallowed again.

"I'm proud of you, buddy. Really proud. Not only did you let yourself enjoy your weekend, but you were very respectful towards Amy right now. A lot of guys in your shoes wouldn't have been."

Sheldon scoffed at that.

"A lot of guys wouldn't fit in my shoes, Leonard. I wear a size 14." He said matter-of-factly. Leonard laughed heartily.

"Yeah. True. But still…I tried to stop Howard from coming here, but he was just concerned. You know…" He trailed off, and Sheldon waved off his explanation.

"Yes, I understand. And I appreciate the vote of confidence." Sheldon said honestly.

Leonard nodded.

"So…um…it really went…well?" Leonard asked kindly.

"Yes, Leonard. Very well. I'm very…happy." He said, looking his friend in the eye.

For years, Leonard had teased Sheldon about not having hormones. Most recently, at their prom re-enactment. He knew he hurt Sheldon's feelings that night; he was already nervous about engaging in post prom rituals. Luckily, Sheldon made it through unscathed.

That night seemed like a lifetime ago. So much had happened to Sheldon and Amy since then. Leonard sighed when he thought about what it had taken his friend to reach this point.

"Good for you, Sheldon."

Sheldon lowered his head shyly.

"Thank you, Leonard."

"I'll let you go. See you later."

Sheldon nodded, watching his friend retreat, before sitting back up expectantly.

"Leonard…a minute?" Sheldon asked quietly, and Leonard came back in, closing the door.

"What's up, buddy. Are you alright? Do you have any questions?" Leonard asked kindly, sitting down.

Sheldon nodded slowly, unsure how to even say this.

"Leonard…hypothetically…when would you like to move into Penny's place? Permanently?"

The two friends silently stared at each other. Sheldon was terrified that Leonard would explode. Call him a hypocrite. Or tell him he wasn't leaving. He wouldn't blame Leonard, either, after the hell he put him through about it for the last year.

As the seconds stretched on, Sheldon's fears grew. Until Leonard's face broke out in a smile. He shook his head in awe.

"You dog," He said softly, and the tone of his voice alerted Sheldon that he was fine with it. He breathed a huge sigh of relief, attempting a smile of his own.

"I…that's _not_ to say I don't want to live with you anymore. I just…" Sheldon stammered, and Leonard reached over to put a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"You just want to live with the woman you love_ more_. It feels good, doesn't it? To want to share something so profound with another person. And it doesn't mean _we_ care about each other as friends any less, right?" He offered Sheldon. Sheldon nodded, looking down.

"No. You're right. It doesn't. You'll always be my best friend, Leonard." He said so sweetly, so innocently… that Leonard could forget every time Sheldon had ever driven him crazy.

"And you'll always be my best friend, Sheldon." Leonard said, tears in his throat. "Um…I'll talk to Penny. See what works for her. Do you want me out by the weekend?" He laughed nervously. But Sheldon didn't laugh. He looked at his friend with something Leonard could swear was love.

"No. Not as soon as that, Leonard. I just wanted to know. You know…hypothetically."

A look of understanding passed between them, and Leonard rose once again.

"Okay. See you at 5."

Sheldon nodded once.

"See you."

Sheldon stared at the door long after Leonard had left. This was a huge step. He inhaled deeply and tried to name the feelings coursing through him. Sadness. Joy. Excitement. Sad to be parted from his best friend, but joyful to ponder what lay ahead with Amy.

Sheldon sat at his desk for endless moments, pondering his next move. One thing was for certain. He would have to tread carefully. He had plans, and he couldn't afford to ruin them.

For years, Amy had wanted to move in with him. He was confident now, that she knew it had been too soon then. He wasn't ready. He knew without a doubt that Amy understood how he felt. And while he had apologized to her for flying off the handle like he did last May, he knew Amy was very hesitant to bring up the issue again anytime soon, if ever.

So he did what Sheldon Cooper did best. He researched, investigated, and tested it from every angle. He came to only one conclusion.

Sheldon wanted Amy to live with him.

Now, how to go about making that happen…and not completely messing everything up in the process.

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Two weeks later, Amy knocked on 4A for dinner and a movie with the group. She giggled as she heard laughter inside and what sounded like teasing. Knocking on the door, she was surprised when Penny threw it open with a big smile on her face.

"Hey!" Penny gushed, pulling Amy into the apartment and throwing her arms around her friend. She yanked Amy into a bone crushing hug, making the woman squeal for a second in discomfort. She was still getting accustomed to Penny being more tactile with her; after nearly dying, she supposed Penny realized how much she cared for her.

She hadn't really had time in the last two weeks to talk to Amy about her weekend with Sheldon. For some reason, Sheldon seemed to hoard Amy every time Penny was within a ten foot radius of her.

Penny knew without a doubt that they had had sex. Leonard hinted as much, saying Sheldon was 'in a good place.' Yeah…he looked to be in a good place, alright. He was glowing like Kryptonite. Penny was trying to keep her enthusiasm in check, but swore that at Friday's girl's night, she would get the goods.

One look at Amy's serene face, and she could tell Amy was in a _very_ good place herself.

"Penny, would you please take your Nebraska man hands off of my girlfriend?" Sheldon said sarcastically from the kitchen, shooting mock daggers at the blond. Amy gave Sheldon a sweet smile, trying to catch her breath.

"Its fine, Sheldon." Amy chided, smiling at her friend.

"It's not fine, Amy. She shouldn't be manhandling you like that. You're not a steer at the Nebraska State Fair," He said dryly. Amy chuckled at his protectiveness.

Leonard came out from the bedroom, waving at Amy before giving Penny a kiss. Amy smiled at their easy affection.

"Easy, Tex. I won't break your lady," She reassured Sheldon, who glared at her regardless. "So…where have you been hiding yourself, you little lump of wool?" Penny asked cheekily.

"I haven't been hiding. I've been busy," Amy defended, taking off her coat and placing it over Sheldon's chair. Sheldon glanced over, noting she was wearing a new cardigan. This one was burnt orange and made her skin pop with a warm glow. It was late October after all, and she was appropriately dressed for the autumn. He smiled at her, and she blushed.

"Too busy for your bestie? I have so much gossip to catch you up on. And vice versa," Penny said conspiratorially.

Sheldon rolled his eyes, sighing dramatically. He knew Penny was chomping at the bit to find out what happened on their weekend away. She would no doubt wheedle it out of Amy soon enough, but for now, he wanted to keep her at bay for Amy's sake. He came over, taking her out of Penny's bruising grip.

"Okay, Cornhusker. Back off. Tonight is about communal fun, and you're not going to smother Amy with your OK! Gossip rag nonsense. You need to share her," Sheldon said, his voice serious.

Penny shot Sheldon a withering stare. She grabbed Amy by the shoulders, squeezing her tightly.

"He makes you want to climb him like a tree, no?" She taunted Amy, who merely blushed in response.

There had been _a few_ tree climbing incidents in the last few weeks, as it turned out. Amy met Sheldon's gaze, and to her great surprise he winked at her, smiling a slow and sexy smile.

Hoo…

_What the hell was that?_

Penny released Amy to Sheldon's arms, where she walked into them with pleasure. Sheldon kissed her on the top of the head, inhaling her sweet scent.

"Hello, Dr. Fowler," He whispered, and shivered when Amy ran her hands down his back.

"Hello, Dr. Cooper," She responded, equally moved when he cupped the back of her head and delivered a tender kiss to her lips.

"Oh, God. Get a room!" Leonard whined from the sofa, Penny stifling a loud laugh. Sheldon was unruffled, though.

"You both have _no_ room to talk. I've had to witness you groping each other inappropriately for the last seven years. On top of that, my ears have heard things that they can never expunge. I think from now on, you both can afford me the same courtesy…" He said enigmatically. Amy's eyes shot to his in shock.

While she was over the moon with the possibility of increased affections from Sheldon, the idea of his wanting to express those affections in public scared her. Sheldon simply smiled warmly at her, putting her mind at ease.

"Don't worry…I'm just trying to get a rise out of them," He whispered, mirth in his voice. Amy smiled as he planted a quick kiss on the side of her neck. What he didn't realize, was that he was getting a rise out of _her_. In the best way possible.

The door opened with Raj, Bernadette, and Howard filtering in. Bernadette was carrying a dessert that looked amazing, and Howard handed a bottle of wine to Sheldon.

"Thanks for the invite, Sheldon. A home cooked meal from a master Physicist. Wow…" Howard said happily. In the ten years he'd known Sheldon, he never saw him use his stove once.

"You're welcome, Howard. Much like dancing, cooking is something I do extremely well. I hope you've all brought your appetites. We're having Penne in Arrabiata sauce and homemade meatballs. Try not to die from jealousy once you've tried it," Sheldon said to the gang haughtily.

"Aww, there's the Sheldon we all know and love." Bernadette snarked, and Sheldon stopped in his tracks at once, embarrassed.

"Sorry," He said sheepishly, looking over at Amy in apology. His girlfriend could only smile at him dreamily.

Penny leaned over, whispering in Leonard's ear.

"Oh God…look at them. Did you see that? She's turned him into a…human being!" She said teased, and Leonard laughed.

"Yeah. We don't act like that, right?" Leonard asked aloud, to which Penny shook her head and narrowed her eyes.

"Nah. Not even close."

They shot each other matching grins, knowing they so totally did. They both decided they could, indeed, cut Sheldon some slack.

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Dinner was indeed fantastic. Everyone went back for seconds, impressed with Sheldon's skills as a chef. Unlike his earlier egotistical comment, this time whenever someone moaned in appreciation or made a kind remark, he merely smiled.

As fate would have it, the men lost to the ladies as to what movie they would be watching after dinner. Penny had pointed out that the last three movie nights, had been guys choice. Not that she minded Vin Diesel or Chris Evans. But sometimes, the girls needed something fluffy.

To the guy's horror, they chose the Nicholas Sparks film Message in a Bottle. It was either that or Titantic, Penny warned, and Sheldon balked at all of the historical inaccuracies that movie boasted. They piled around the sofa, settling in for what Howard called a 'gut wrenching homage to sappiness'.

"Well, that's two hours of my life I'm never getting back," Leonard said, rolling his eyes as he saw not only Penny and Bernadette, but Raj dabbing their eyes with a tissue. He rose to throw away some empty bottles and popcorn tubs as the girls straightened up the coffee table and brought dishes and plates to the sink.

"I can't believe you girls punished us by making us watch that god-awful movie. It was worse than that other one from the same guy. The one with the trapper keeper," Leonard mumbled, dumping the trash in the bin. Penny guffawed loudly.

"That's the NOTEBOOK, you genius," She said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. Bernadette giggled beside her. "And I thought you were tenderhearted," Penny teased.

"Whatever. It was still two hours of skull pounding misery. And it was so _sad_. I mean, can't you girls ever find a movie that isn't so damn depressing? Does everything have to be about summer houses, lost loves, and missed opportunities? Give me an Iron Man movie. You know where you are with Tony Stark."

Howard nodded enthusiastically, earning a snide look from Bernadette.

Sheldon rose from his spot, heading to the kitchen to start filling the sink with soapy water. He pursed his lips, pondering Leonard's words.

"Well, it wasn't _so_ bad." He chimed in, earning an incredulous glare from both Leonard and Howard. Raj, of course, smiled dreamily at Sheldon's romantic viewpoint.

"Oh, come on Sheldon. If you say you _liked_ that film, I will personally take your man card away." Leonard said in disgust.

Sheldon shrugged at Leonard.

"I didn't…_not_ like it. It was…tolerable. In a mind numbing sort of way. I found myself wishing it had a happier ending, though." He said thoughtfully. Amy looked over at him at that remark, watching him.

"Well, I thought it was beautiful. It really shows how true love transcends any situation. And the fact he was going to go to her, but died rescuing those people on their boat…oh, man. That was a choker," Raj lamented, wiping an actual tear. He became very emotional with any Kevin Costner film.

Amy didn't know what possessed her to speak up, but she found the words coming out before she could filter them.

"I did that, once - Threw a bottle into the sea. You know, like his late wife did."

The entire room stared at her, Penny smiling a quirky smile at her friend.

"Really? _You?"_ She questioned, and Amy shrugged.

"Yeah. I just…I just remembered that. I must have forgotten. It was ten years ago, when I graduated Harvard. Huh…" She said.

Bernadette smiled at her, knowing there must be a reason behind her story.

"So…what was in the bottle? A love letter to an unrequited crush?" She asked, her teasing voice making the group laugh. All but Sheldon, who had his back to them.

Amy shook her head.

"No…it wasn't a love letter. It was…a poem." She said slowly, remembering. "A very special poem. To me, anyway."

Intrigued, Penny came back and sat beside her.

"Oh? What poem? What did it say?"

Amy thought back to that spring day on Nantasket beach. She smiled sadly as she remembered the exact emotions coursing through her that day - loneliness, despair, and fear. She'd come light years from that moment, and she found herself realizing that what she put in that bottle had not come to pass. And for that, she was grateful.

"Are you familiar with the poet T.S. Eliot?" She asked, and most everyone nodded.

"He wrote a poem about…regret. It's called The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock. It's about thinking you have time to do those things you think you will do, before it's too late. The man in question in the poem was in love with a girl, and he never told her. But he kept saying throughout the poem that there will indeed be time to do this, and to do that. At that point in my life, I was pretty unhappy, and worried about the future. I never wanted to rock the boat, or stand out in a crowd…I really identified with him. By the time he gets the courage to admit his love, he's an old man. So much wasted time…There's a line in the poem which reads 'Do I dare disturb the Universe?' It speaks of us daring to have the courage to grab what we want, knowing the Universe might not allow it. It really touched me. I was embarking on a new life, and I wondered if I too would be able to do what he did. So…that's what I put in my bottle. That's what I threw into the sea that day."

There was silence in the room as the friends digested her words. Suddenly there was a crash in the kitchen which had them all glancing over.

Sheldon had been doing the dishes, and one of them slipped out of his grasp, shattering on the hardwood floor.

"Sheldon? Are you alright?" Amy said, getting up to make sure he wasn't cut.

Sheldon knelt down, picking up the larger pieces carefully.

"I'm…alright. I just dropped it. The soap," He said, looking up at Amy in a daze. "The soap made it slippery."

Amy knelt to help him, while Leonard went and got the broom and dustpan from the closet. After he swept up the remaining mess, Sheldon watched Amy return to the couch.

"Well, I think that's beautiful, Amy. Somewhere out there, your bottle is floating around in the sea, waiting to be found." Bernadette said thoughtfully, and Amy pursed her lips.

"Yeah. I guess. I haven't thought about that in ten years. It's amazing what the brain remembers. Hey, I should know, right?" She chuckled, and Raj and the girls joined in.

They watched the news for a bit, before Howard jumped up and put on his coat.

"Well, thanks for dinner Sheldon, and that heart ripping film," Howard said humorously, helping his wife with her own coat. They said their goodbyes, and Raj followed suit. Penny and Leonard decided it was time to call it a night, too. Penny had some samples from work she had to sort out for the next day, and Leonard was going to watch a movie while she worked at her place.

Once everyone was gone, Amy sat down on her spot on the couch, watching Sheldon at his computer. He had retreated there after he finished the dishes, and hadn't moved since.

"Sheldon? Are you alright?" She asked in concern, relieved when he turned and smiled at her softly. Rising, he came and sat beside her in his spot.

"Yes, I'm fine. I um…I just have something I needed to tell you. Amy…I need to go to Texas. Just for two days. Something…came up, and…I have to take care of some things. I didn't want to leave without telling you. I have to go first thing tomorrow morning."

Amy furrowed her brows in concern.

"But…tomorrow? Why didn't you mention it earlier? Is everything alright? Is it your mom, or…Meemaw?" She asked fearfully. Sheldon shook his head rapidly in the negative.

"No. No, it's not anyone. I just have some things I need to get back home and some business to attend to. I didn't want you to worry. I'll be back after two days, I promise." He said, his voice low and serious. "I'm sorry I didn't mention it earlier."

Amy had no reason to worry, yet his abrupt departure didn't exactly make her happy. They promised each other to be honest, so she had no choice but to believe him.

"Alright," She said softly. "I'll miss you, Sheldon."

Sheldon stared at her for long moments, and for some odd reason, Amy got the impression he was trying to memorize her. That was ridiculous. For one, Sheldon had an eidetic memory and two, he was coming back. She trusted him.

"I will miss you too, Amy." He murmured, pulling her close to him and inhaling her scent. Amy wrapped her arms around him tightly.

They hadn't made plans to spend the night together, and Amy felt strange bringing it up now. Sheldon seemed distracted somehow, so she figured it was best to let him have space.

"It's late. I should go and let you rest. Will you be okay?"

Sheldon didn't blink as he looked at her, unnerving her further.

"Yes." He whispered, getting up and leading her to the door. Once there, he kissed her gently, hugging her tightly before she could even respond.

"Drive safely," He said, running his fingers down her cheek. Amy swallowed, shaking her head.

"I will. Goodnight, Sheldon."

"Goodnight, Amy."

On the other side of the door, Amy leaned into it and wondered if Sheldon was keeping something from her. His entire demeanor had shifted over the course of the evening. He seemed sad and aloof, and she was worried something or someone had set him off.

Had she?

"No." She said aloud quietly, knowing that wasn't the case. Sheldon wouldn't keep things from her. Not anymore.

Still, she drove home with a heavy heart, knowing she wouldn't be getting any sleep that night.

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Sheldon sat in a rental car outside of his Grandmother's house. He had caught the 4 am redeye to Houston, renting a car and driving himself the journey to Meemaws. He had left Leonard a note telling him of his last minute trip, and that he would be home in two day's time.

He didn't know where he got the courage to drive the hour long distance on his own; perhaps Amy's faith in him and the fact his confidence had grown over the months is what did it. Truthfully, he couldn't face calling his mother or sister to pick him up. He needed to see his grandmother alone.

There was a large oak tree in the front yard that he used to sit under as a child, reading comic books and escaping the chaos of what was happening at home. Her home, and this yard, were his safe haven when it all became too much.

When bullies would pick on him, he would come here. When his father came home drunk and fought with Mary, he'd come here. When he was having a crisis with his studies and was confused as to why he was such a genius, he would come here.

Meemaw would always bake him cookies; sugar for spring, chocolate chip for summer, peanut butter for autumn, and butter for winter. She would bring him out a batch fresh from the oven, pulling up a bench and sitting beside him. Some of the most meaningful conversations of his life were spent under that tree, with his beloved maternal grandmother. She would always have the right words to say, to put his mind at ease. Her wisdom was legendary around these parts. He didn't know if it was the cookies, her love, or a combination of both. He just knew…she made everything better.

He needed that wisdom now, more than ever.

Getting out of the car he made his way up the porch, standing at the door which was the gateway to Heaven for him. His mind was awhirl with questions, and his heart was heavy.

After a few seconds of stalling, he knocked quietly.

Sheldon never gave much thought to fate until he met Amy Farrah Fowler. The day he met the gifted, lovely Neuroscientist, he chalked it up to a random computer's justification of syntax errors. As the days wore on, he came to the blinding realization that this woman would play a part in his life he'd never imagined. She would change his life. Rearrange it. Perfect it.

Chaos. Clear and simple.

Another paradigm shift was taking place, and this time…he didn't know how to accept it.

Last night, after Penny and Leonard retired next door and Amy had left, he retreated to his bedroom and sat on his bed staring at the wall. Seeing nothing. Seeing everything. And not comprehending.

_This isn't true, this can't be true._ His mind supplied.

It was all he could do after dinner to sit still. He wanted to come to his room straightaway, but couldn't with his friends and Amy there. He quickly went online to Southwest Airlines, getting a last minute ticket for a flight to Houston. He was on autopilot; not fully cognizant of his actions until after he plugged his credit card number in the payment field.

His apartment was silent. So silent, yet he could hear a million voices running through his thoughts.

_It's not possible. There is no way in an organized, structured Universe that this is possible. _Yet he knew, deep to his core, that it _was_ true. It _was _possible. But he couldn't believe it.

His eyes had traced across the room until they landed on his closet. Fearful, knowing what lay within. Like a ghost waiting to jump out at him.

That voice. That one voice. _His_ voice….in his own head. He focused on that one, trying to make sense of the nights events. He kept coming up short; nothing would compute; nothing would balance. This wasn't some equation he could fix, this was something out of his realm.

_Way _out.

Rising, he had walked over to the closet, and pulled out a heavy wooden box that was carved in ornate wood. It belonged to his grandfather - his Pop-Pop. He had made this box himself when he was 18, in the prime of his life. He had just met Meemaw. Upon his death, Sheldon was left this box in his will. It held sentimental value to Sheldon, more than any monetary treasure could. He put his prized possessions in this box, everything special or cherished. Most recently, he put in the letter that Meemaw wrote to Amy.

He lifted the lid of the box, the smell of cedar, orange, and ink wafting up to his nose. Sheldon inhaled the scent, loving it. It spoke of cherished memories. He pushed aside the other contents gently, careful not to disturb anything, and pulled out the item he sought.

_Buried away, safe from prying eyes. _

Sheldon walked backward, sitting back down on his bed, his eyes scanning the treasure. It was beautiful in its simplicity; full of Victorian charm. It was carved beveled glass, smooth and delicate. It was obviously an antique.

For years he had held onto this, not caring what lay within until one day five years ago, curiosity got the better of him, and he opened it. He knew the words that were hidden inside, had read the poem before, although he had no understanding to why the copier of these particular words chose them. He had put it back and forgotten about it. Whomever wrote it, must have loved these words.

Once again, years later, now…he uncorked the stopper - pulling out the contents within. Holding his breath, he unfurled the scroll and his eyes widened as he took in the typed words. Hoping they would be different. Hoping his perfect memory had failed that day, and memorized something else. He closed his eyes, wincing.

_This had to be a joke…_

"Moonpie!" Meemaw shrieked happily and brought Sheldon back to reality. She opened the screen door widely and engulfed him in a hug the size of Texas itself. Sheldon, at least 12 inches taller, fell into her embrace. After a few moments, he stood tall, picking her up as if she weighed nothing, and held her. He had missed her so much. She was the one person in this world outside of Amy that held his heart in her hand.

She spoke rapid fire to him, but all he could do was stand there, staring at her. She knew immediately that something was wrong.

"Sheldon, are you alone? Did your friends come with you, or your girl? Why didn't you call me and tell me you were arriving?" She asked in rushed concern, her blue eyes peering around the yard for anyone accompanying him.

Sheldon shook his head, unable to answer. His brain was sluggish and wouldn't communicate with his mouth. Meemaw pulled away, grabbing both of his hands in hers.

"Sheldon…what is it? What's wrong? Did something happen?" Is Amy sick again?" She asked fearfully.

Sheldon shook his head in the negative.

"Amy…she's not sick, Meemaw. But something did happen. I had to see you. I need to talk to you." He croaked, his deep voice sounding exhausted.

If you would have asked her what her grandson sounded like in that moment, she would have said haunted. He sounded _haunted_, like he was carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"Come inside, Sheldon." She said sternly, pulling him in and closing the heavy wooden door shut behind her.

Suddenly, the scents and emotions of being here, of being _home_, overwhelmed him. Tears sprang to his eyes as he paced around her sitting room for ten minutes, unable to say what he wanted. He had no idea where to even begin.

Meemaw sat on the sofa, watching him like a hawk as he walked to and fro, seemingly distraught but not able to articulate his thoughts.

"What's going on, Sheldon?" She tried gently.

He stopped pacing, suddenly standing still and staring at her oddly for a moment. Meemaw waited patiently.

"Mama used to say that you and Pop-Pop's love was like a fairy tale. I knew the both of you were special, but…I never believed in fairy tales. I never believed that two people…I know you both had a special love, but…fairy tales don't exist. Twists of fate, don't exist. I am a Scientist. I believe in the tangible. I believe in what I can see. What I can feel. What I can explain." He said firmly, his hands making a cut and dry movement.

Sheldon looked extremely agitated. Something had happened, she was sure of is. She tried to keep him calm enough to tell her what it was.

"I know that, Sheldon. I know what you believe. And I've always supported you." Meemaw said gently.

Sheldon continued on, having seemingly not heard a word she said.

"I don't believe in happily ever after. I don't. I mean…I…I _didn't_. But now…" He stammered, his eyes wild and unfocused. Meemaw feared he was going to have one of his panic attacks. He made eye contact with her, and he could tell he was worrying her.

"Tell me, Shelly." She whispered. "Tell me what it is you've come to say."

Sheldon closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

"I don't know where to begin, without sounding like a crazy person." He admitted.

Meemaw narrowed her eyes.

"You're _not _crazy, Moonpie." She said with conviction.

"Yeah," He echoed, unconvinced.

Meemaw hazarded a guess, trying to help him along.

"Is it Amy? Are you two having problems?" She whispered, afraid to upset him.

Sheldon met her concerned gaze. He came to sit down beside her, so closely that their knees touched.

"No. Not at all. In fact…things have been perfect. So very perfect. I've never been so happy in my entire life," He whispered.

His grandmother, nodded, although he wasn't making sense.

"Sheldon…I don't understand. Then what's the problem?" She asked patiently.

There was nothing else to be done. The time for stalling was over. Reaching inside his jacket pocket, he unearthed a small glass bottle. His grandmother stared at it.

"What is that?" She asked curiously.

Sheldon put the bottle on his lap, running his hands through his hair.

"Do you remember when I came to visit you and mama eight years ago?

She nodded, urging him to continue.

"Missy wanted to go to the beach. You know I've never liked the beach. But she said she didn't want to go alone, so I went with her to Galveston. I didn't want to lay there baking in the Sun, so I took a walk. I found myself walking for at least a mile. I was distracted. Penny had just moved in next door to Leonard and I, and I was annoyed at how much our lives were being turned upside by her. I suppose I was a little jealous at the time that she was taking up so much Leonard's time. Suddenly, I stepped on something. Looking down, I thought it was a shell. But it wasn't. It was a bottle.

_This_ bottle.

Meemaw reached over and took the bottle from Sheldon's lap, studying it from every angle.

"It's very beautiful," She murmured. It looks like an antique."

"Yes…it is," Sheldon echoed. "I liked it so much, that I kept it. I brought it home with me. A couple of years ago, I realized there was a note inside. It was intriguing; at first I thought, it was ancient. The bottle is old. But the note inside…it's recent. _Very_ recent," He whispered.

His eyes met hers, and she could sense there was something monumental happening here.

"What is this bottle, Shelly? Why does it mean so much to you?" She asked, her papery fingers tightening their hold on the glass.

Rising, he paced again in agitation.

"It never_ did_ mean much to me. At least, I never thought it did. I just knew, somehow, that I was meant to find it. That was why I held onto it all this time." He licked his lips.

Meemaw nodded in understanding.

"Last night, we were all watching a movie. That sappy romance movie Message in a Bottle. Amy mentioned that she once threw a bottle into the ocean. A bottle that had a poem written on it. A poem that is very rare. The poem that is in _this_ bottle, Meemaw," He said frantically, his eyes burning into hers.

It took a minute for the realization to set in. Another for Meemaw to collect her jaw from the floor. And another for her to find her voice.

"Are you saying…Oh, My…" She whispered, stunned.

Sheldon rapidly shook his head.

"I don't know _what_ I'm saying. I can't believe I'm even considering this…what does this mean?" He implored her, searching her kind eyes for the answer. She was certain, he would not like any she had to offer.

"What do you _think_ this means?" She asked him cryptically. Anyone else, Sheldon would have scoffed angrily. He could only stare at her, helplessly. She was going to make him say it, and he wasn't sure that he could.

"I…I think this means I'm as crazy as everyone thought I was," He said angrily, putting the bottle back in his pocket carefully.

"Sheldon, Stop it." Meemaw admonished him seriously, "I'm asking you, as your grandmother who loves you, to just…think a moment."

The truth she was trying to convey made no sense to Sheldon. His brain would not let him compute. She gazed at him with something akin to pity.

"Meemaw…there is _no_ way that my girlfriend threw a bottle into the ocean in Boston ten years ago, and I found it two years later on a Galveston Beach! Before I even met her, which in itself is a miracle. Do you have any _idea_ what the odds are of that happening?" He asked desperately, and his grandmother knew him well enough to know he had already done the math.

"A trillion to one, now doubt. But Sheldon…there is still the one." She said hopefully.

"I don't believe that," He rasped, shaking his head back and forth to even dispel such a notion.

"Why not? Can you explain it any other way?"

Sheldon gaped at her.

"I don't accept this. I _can't_ accept this! This is…impossible." He said defiantly.

Meemaw sat back, shaking her head.

"Why, Sheldon. Why can't you accept it? Why are you fighting this? As a Scientist, you know there are things not yet explainable. But you believe in their _possibility_. What is the difference?" She asked patiently.

He looked at her blankly.

Because…they are _logical_ assumptions. Based on mathematical facts. They make sense. This makes _no_ sense." He roared, his tone frightened and defensive.

"Oh…you and logic. Yes, Son. Logic makes sense. But not everything does. There could be another way."

Sheldon defiantly shook his head.

"There _is_ no other way, Meemaw. If Science can't explain it, then it doesn't exist. " He said with finality.

She gazed at her grandson shrewdly. She could see he was desperately trying to convince himself of this.

"That! That right there…_that_ is your problem. All your life, you have been so stubborn. Holding firm to your beliefs. And Sheldon…most of the time, that's a good thing. But if you do it out of defiance, then you are going to find a great many things are not what you thought they were. The answers are there. You just have to know where to look."

Sheldon hung his head. His Meemaw had never been so stern and direct with him. For a moment, he was completely taken aback. Suddenly, his tone changed to one of fear.

"Do you want me to just...disregard everything I've spent my life believing?" He asked quietly. His face looked so frightened, and Meemaw's heart ached for him.

"Good Heavens…No, Shelly. I want you to keep an open mind. Why is this so difficult for you to fathom, when you can believe in a ball of gas beginning the Universe? Or any other spectacular facts of Science that maybe, just maybe…were once deemed to be impossible?"

Sheldon stared at his beloved grandmother like _she_ were crazy.

"Because! It defies reason and logic. It defies _everything_ I know to be true."

Meemaw pursed her lips. "Well, you don't know _everything_, do you?" She asked him, tartly.

He looked at her, almost affronted by her accusation. Meewaw smiled coyly.

"Sheldon…from the moment you were born, I knew you were meant for extraordinary things. You are magnificently brilliant. Did you honestly think there was any way, on God's green Earth, that your love story would be any _less_ extraordinary? Did you think that you were destined for some hum-drum boy-meets-girl fling that wouldn't mean anything? Because your wrong, child. Everything you've done in your life is touched by magic. It only stands to reason that this would be as well."

Sheldon began to shake, his entire body trembling.

"I…this isn't real. Things like this they…they don't happen. Not in the real world. The physical, Scientific, organic world, Meemaw. It's impossible." He stammered, trying desperately to make his words true.

Meemaw licked her lips, her eyes straying to the bottle Sheldon was clutching like a precious jewel.

"It seems to me, that it doesn't matter what you do and don't believe, Moonpie. The proof is right there in your hand. Nobody put that in your possession. _You_ found it. You. It was meant for you. You can't get any more real than that. Fate has decided for you, Sheldon. Does the world stop spinning because you can't see it? Does time cease because you can't feel it moving forward? Perhaps the greatest gift that you can possess as a Scientist, is to know that there are mysteries out there that will never be explained. And to be alright with that. You don't have to see the magic, to believe it."

Sheldon sat back down next to her.

"I don't know what to believe. I can't understand how this came to pass. It doesn't make sense. This would mean…this would mean that…" He stuttered pathetically.

Meemaw's tears trailed down her face.

"Yes, Sheldon. It would mean that you and Amy were destined to be together. By whatever means, you found your way to each other. Out of billions of people. You know it, and I know you know it because I can see it in your eyes. You're afraid to believe. And that's okay."

She watched as her grandson fought a battle with himself. She reached over, taking his large hand inside her smaller one.

"Sheldon, when you were 11 and went off to college, I told you something important. Do you remember what that was," She asked, knowing full well with his eidetic memory he remembered everything.

But Sheldon didn't feel the need to point that out to his grandmother.

"Yes ma'am. I remember. You told me that I wasn't special because I was different, but that I was different because I was special. And you said that because of my scientific knowledge, there may come a day when I no longer believed in the presence of a deity, in contrast to what I was raised to believe. You said I should remember to always keep an open mind, regardless."

Meemaw smiled at her favorite, shaking her head.

"Yes, Moonpie. That is correct. And that open mind can help you in many ways. I've watched you over the years. I have seen you mature into a man, whereas before you acted like a _child_. You've changed, and for the better. I think your Amy has much to do with that evolution. The way she sounded when I spoke to her…her tone of voice, and her need to do something special for you nearly stole my breath away. It reminded me of something. Shall I tell you what?"

Sheldon gulped, not sure he was following where she was taking this. He felt a thin sheen of perspiration bead his forehead. Dutifully, he nodded.

"It reminded me of your Pop-Pop and me. The sweet, all-consuming love we had for each other. The purity of it. It's a beautiful thing to witness. And I could have only ever dreamt it would happen for you. There's something I want to give you. I've been wanting to give it to you since you were a boy. And now you're a man. So it's time. I will be right back. Stay put," She whispered, getting up and patting his knee.

Sheldon watched her retreat upstairs, his gaze following her. She returned after a moment and stood before him. Out of respect, Sheldon rose to his feet and looked down at her. She reached over and took one of his hands, placing it palm up. In it, she dropped a small blue box. It said Tiffany &amp; Co.

"What is this?" He asked quietly, already knowing the answer. A feeling of panic rose up inside, and he stumbled sideways back to the couch. Meemaw followed him, sitting beside him.

"This is my engagement ring, from when your Pop-Pop proposed to me. I've waited your whole life to give this to you, Sheldon. I love your brother and sister, but I must admit…you've always been my heart. If anyone was going to get this prized possession of mine, it would be you. To give to your future bride."

Sheldon sat stunned, his eyes fixed to the box dumbly. Meemaw smiled, pulling back the hinge to reveal a blue sapphire and diamond ring. The platinum band was pristine, the stones gleaming brightly.

"Good Lord," Sheldon murmured as he studied the exquisite ring. He vaguely remembered seeing this ring on her finger when he was a child, but after he left for college she must have taken it off and put it away.

"I had it cleaned last January for you," She stated quietly. Sheldon's eyes met hers in confusion.

"January?"

Meemaw nodded.

"Yes. After your girl called me at Christmas, I just…I had a feeling. And after your Mama called me when Amy almost died, and told me the state you were in, well…I just knew. The time for playing games was over, wasn't it? And I wanted it to be ready for you. If and when the moment came."

Sheldon stared at the ring, speechless. This wasn't some trinket she was offering him. This was something so profoundly more. His heart thudded in his chest and his blood pounded in his ears. Suddenly, his mouth was as dry as the desert.

"Meemaw," He rasped, stunned at what the implications of this meant. He was overwhelmed today, by everything that had transpired. He didn't know if he could take anymore.

Meemaw saw his distress, and pulled herself close to him.

"Listen to me, Moonpie. I know you. And when I spoke with Amy on the phone, I knew her too. I sensed her intentions. And they were serious. That girl is your Soulmate, Shelly. I want you to grasp that happiness that is so close to your reach and never look back. Do you hear me?" She asked sternly, taking her grandson's hands in her papery soft ones.

"Do you think someone like her comes around more than once in a lifetime? Someone who completely understands you? Knows all of your shortcomings and loves you _anyway_?"

Sheldon looked up in shock. He dared not contradict to his beloved Meemaw that he never considered he suffered from shortcomings. Yet it wasn't her comment about shortcomings that rattled him.

"Do _you_ believe in Soulmates, Meemaw?" He asked her tentatively. His grandmother smiled widely.

"Yes, Son. Of course I do. You know I do," She said sincerely, and Sheldon swallowed. Meemaw tilted her head and stared at him with loving eyes.

"Sheldon…do you love Amy? Truly, deeply love her?"

Sheldon gasped.

"Yes, Meemaw. I love her with everything I am. But the more I love her, the more scared I become," He said honestly.

Meemaw scoffed gently.

"Scared of what, Honey? What is there to be afraid of?"

Sheldon blew out a deep breath.

"Failing, Meemaw. Not being enough. Not making her happy. I've done a horrible job making her happy. I can't tell you how many times I've upset her over the years, embarrassed her. Distanced her…I may never be what she needs. I may never be able to give her what she wants." He lamented, starting to feel helpless.

She eyed her grandson with pity.

"Just what is it you think she wants, Sugar?" She asked gently, squeezing his knee in comfort.

Suddenly, Sheldon didn't know what to say.

She sighed heavily. She could see where the problem was here. He wasn't afraid of loving Amy. He was afraid of losing himself in the process. It broke her heart to see him suffering over something so easily fixable.

"Sheldon, I don't think Amy wants to change you. I think she would only like you to yield a bit, to accommodate her. It's only fair, Shelly. It's only natural."

Sheldon rose from the couch, pacing in front of her. She knew she struck a nerve with him. She only hoped it was the right nerve. She waited silently while he debated the facts in his mind, warring with himself. It was as sad as it was fascinating to witness. She knew he would come to the correct solution, once his brilliant mind was able to weigh all the facts. Finally, he stopped in the middle of the floor, turning to her.

"In all of the years I was with you and Pop-Pop, I never saw you unhappy. Not once. You looked at him like he was your hero. Even now, when you talk about him, you get a look in your eyes that is beautiful. How did you know, Meemaw? How does anyone?" He asked, his voice desperate.

Meemaw could only smile.

"You just do, Sheldon."

After a while, Sheldon nodded solemnly. He looked at the ring in his hand one last time before closing the lid and putting it in his pocket.

"Thank you, Meemaw. For the ring. For your advice. For your love. I didn't know what to do last night. I felt…lost and scared. But I knew I could count on you to show me the way," He whispered, first one tear and then another trailing down his cheek.

Meemaw rose, and wiped the tears away.

"Be happy, Moonpie. Just allow yourself to be happy. Promise me," She implored.

Sheldon rapidly nodded his head, trying to be strong. His grandmother's eyes wandered over his shoulder to the yard beyond.

"Sheldon…how on Earth did you get here?"

"I drove," He said simply, as though it were a normal, everyday occurrence.

"Will wonders never cease…" Meemaw murmured, shaking her head. She stood back, taking in her grandson with new eyes. He was so different now, a man grown. Light years ahead of how he was last Christmas when Missy's son was born. He carried himself differently, as well. She hadn't noticed earlier when she found him at her door, but he had changed. Matured.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to comprehend what had brought about such a change. Her grandson was in love. And she was positive that love was reciprocated.

Tears gathered in her blue eyes. Happy tears, full of joy, as she took in the enormity of this situation.

"Lord have mercy." She said in awe.

Sheldon looked away, shyly.

"Yeah," He whispered.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Sheldon spent the night with his grandmother, the two of them not bothering to tell Mary and Missy that he was in town. Meemaw wanted some private time with her favorite grandson, and Sheldon was happy to oblige her.

They reminisced all night of days gone by, looking at old pictures and sharing stories. Sheldon told Meemaw his and Amy's entire story, from beginning to end, especially the events of the last eight months. She sat riveted, unable to fathom how such an amazing tale of love had happened to her shy Moonpie. She knew the decision to give him that ring was the right one.

The next morning, Sheldon went outside, sitting on the bench under the huge oak tree. Meemaw brought out a tray of iced tea and snickerdoodle cookies for them, setting it down on the table. A wide grin bloomed on Sheldon's face as he stared at the goodies affectionately.

"Tea and Snickerdoodles…" He whispered, remembering a conversation he and Penny shared years ago. He shook his head with humor. "Such a Southern thing, isn't it?" He asked is grandmother, and the older woman grinned as she poured her grandson a glass.

"It is. Very. Southern hospitality must never go by the wayside. I know with your fancy degrees, you might think such traditions are hokum, but that just isn't true. Good manners, being a gentleman…I want you to always remember to treat people with respect, Sheldon. No matter how that IQ of yours is."

Her tone was loving, yet stern, and mixed with The Southern charm he loved so much.

"Yes, Ma'am," He said with respect, taking the proffered glass of tea. It tasted of sunshine and home; no doubt brewed in the sun on her porch.

They sat in silence, absorbing yesterday's events and enjoying each other's company. A thought occurred to Sheldon, and he turned to find his grandmother staring at the tree, lost in thought.

"Meemaw? Didn't you grow up in this house?" He asked curiously. She nodded.

"Yes, I did. Your great-grandparents built this house from the ground up. After we were married, Pop-Pop and I moved to Houston for his job. When my parent's passed, they willed the house to me, and Pop-Pop and I moved back in."

Sheldon nodded, taking a sip of tea thoughtfully.

"Mama once told me a story about Pop-Pop getting caught climbing through your window once. Was that here, in this house?"

Meemaw laughed heartily, her eyes flying to Sheldon's in shock.

"Your mama told you that? I oughta take her over my knee…Yes. He did, and this was the very house. He climbed up on that large branch right there, the one with the wind chimes," She said, pointing up. While not a fan of wind chimes, Sheldon felt comforted by the sound as he listened. He could imagine his grandfather climbing through his grandmother's window, trying to steal a kiss.

"I'm surprised your daddy didn't get out his shotgun," Sheldon chuckled, and Meemaw shot her grandson a look full of annoyance.

"The _point_ is…he did it to be romantic. Because he loved me. I'll never forget that, as long as I live. He bought me so many things over the course of our marriage. Cars, jewelry…but no gesture could match that." She said sweetly, her eyes remembering. Sheldon smiled warmly at how beautiful she looked as she thought of her late husband.

"You've had a lot to digest, Sugar." She stated seriously. Sheldon met her eyes hesitantly.

"Yes." He said, his voice quiet.

Leaning forward, Meemaw put her hand on his knee, squeezing gently.

"Who can know what the mysteries of love are, Moonpie. It's alright, not to have all the answers. What do you think Amy will do, once she finds out? How do you think _she's_ going to react?"

Sheldon hadn't thought about that. Tell Amy? Good Lord…but how?

"Meemaw…I don't know how I _can_ tell her. What would I even _say_?" He wondered aloud, getting anxiety simply thinking about it. Meemaw shook her head, unsure how to advise her favorite.

"Honestly? I don't know. But I do know this - A gift has been given to you. A _very _special gift. One that can never be duplicated. What are you going to do with that gift? Accept it? Keep it safe? Or…throw it away? The choice, Sheldon, is yours. If and when you decide to tell her, make sure you know she can accept it. Make sure, the time is right." She said gently.

Sheldon nodded thoughtfully, his gaze roaming around the yard.

"Your Pop-Pop would be so very proud of you, Sheldon. You're daddy, too. I know he didn't always show it, but he loved you dearly. He took great pride in how intelligent you were. I think…well, I think your daddy was envious of you, Son."

Sheldon's eyes watered, remembering that Amy told him the same thing so many months ago. At the time, he argued with Amy and refused to believe such a thing. Now…he was beginning to understand how such an intellect might have made his simple father feel jealous.

"Amy said the same thing, once. I couldn't accept it then. But I can accept it now. She reminds me of you in so many ways, Meemaw." He said reverently.

Meemaw smiled warmly. "Your Amy is a wonderful girl, Shelly. I can't tell you how happy I am that you have her. I told her as much in a letter a few months back."

Sheldon smiled.

"I know, Meemaw. I know all about that letter." He whispered.

Sheldon went on to explain just _how _he knew. And what part his grandmother had played in his finally accepting his feelings.

When he was finished, Meemaw rose and embraced her grandson, Sheldon putting his arms around her waist and leaning into her stomach. She patted his head lovingly.

"I am so very proud of you, Sheldon. I never doubted you for a moment." She said fondly.

Together, they cried in each other's arms. Grandmother and grandson, old and young, man and woman.

The Sun was high in the sky, casting it's shadows across the yard. Sheldon felt like the Sun was shining just for them.

After leaving Meemaws and heading for the airport, Sheldon decided to make a stop.

Getting out of the car, he walked the short distance to where he first found the bottle. The little stretch of beach was deserted today, and he sat down on the hard-packed sand, staring blankly at the Gulf.

The bottle must have drifted with the current, taking two years to reach Galveston Beach. Sheldon had worked out the math, still uncomprehending as to how this happened. He decided that it didn't matter.

He didn't have the answers, and quite possibly never would. But he had the proof; and that was all that mattered now.

Sheldon ran through the domino effect of things that would have had to happen for him to meet Amy. Howard and Raj putting his name in that computer dating survey, showing up at the coffee shop that day, taking her information with him and becoming her friend. He shook his head in silent wonder at what he almost lost, so many times. Both due to fate, and his own hand. The Universe was telling him something.

For once in his life, he was going to forget about equations, calculations, and probability theorems, and simply go with blind faith. He pulled out the bottle from his pocket, staring at it in awe.

"How did I ever find you?" He whispered, and Amy's face instantly appeared before him. He wondered what she must have felt the day she threw this into the sea. Lonely, perhaps. But she wasn't ever really alone. Her journey was already laid out before her, as his had been. For even had he never found this bottle, they had found each other anyway. The fact that he _did_ find it, only cemented in his mind that theirs was truly a union written in the stars.

He bit his lip as tears pooled in his eyes. "How did I ever find _her_?" He asked the cool wind, knowing full well no answer was forthcoming. "How did I ever get so damn lucky?"

Sheldon rose from the sand, brushing off his pants and headed back to his rental car. There was a life back home waiting for him in Pasadena, and he was anxious to get back to it.

Back to _her_.

Once again, as he did years before, he left this beach carrying the beautiful bottle securely in his pocket.

But now…it was also a part of his heart.

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Amy's apartment was dark and quiet when he arrived. It was after 11 when he slipped her key into the lock softly. He set his bag down by the door, moving into her bedroom quietly. She was asleep in the center of the bed, adapting his sleeping style. She looked so lovely and peaceful, that it made him smile.

The enormity of the day and what had transpired overwhelmed him. He needed to lay down beside her and absorb her life force. He climbed in bed next to her, careful not to startle her.

"Amy? It's me," He whispered gently, taking her shoulder and caressing it. Touching her was like touching pure electricity. Every cell in his body came alive.

Amy rolled over, staring up at Sheldon with sleepy, unfocused eyes.

"You're back," She whispered tenderly, stroking his cheek. Sheldon nodded, leaning into her touch.

"Yes. I'm back," He whispered in return.

"What are you doing here so late? Are you alright?" She asked softly. Sheldon merely nodded.

"I'm sorry I woke you. I just had to see you…touch you," He rasped, running his hands along her arms with the barest of touches.

"It's alright, Sheldon. I don't mind you waking me. I'm so happy to see you. Did you do what you went to Texas to do?" She asked, and Sheldon nodded, swallowing deeply.

"Yes. I did. Everything is fine now," He croaked, and the tone of his voice woke Amy out of her haze. She sat up, turning on the light and squinting. Her gaze focused on Sheldon. He looked so tired.

"What is it, Sweetheart? Are you sure you're alright?" She asked him, the loving sentiment slipping from her lips in her tired state. Sheldon gaped at her. While he had called her affectionate names in the recent past, such as vixen and little lady, Amy herself had never voiced such a thing. The way the term of endearment sounded on her lips made him cry. Tears sprang to his eyes, and he grabbed her and engulfed her in a crushing hug. He kissed her neck with tenderness, not letting her go.

He was never letting her go again.

"Amy please…" He cried, his sobs growing louder.

"What is it? What's wrong? Sheldon, you're scaring me," She said honestly. She had no idea what had happened to him.

"Amy…I want you to live with me. Say you will. Please," He begged her, clutching her back tighter and tighter.

_What?_

"Sheldon…-"

"I don't want to spend another night without you. Please, Amy. I love you so much. I need you. I know I've ruined my chances with how I've behaved in the past. I wasn't ready, Amy. I wasn't ready then. I'm ready now. I swear to you, I am. Please say you will live with me."

His tears wouldn't stop flowing, and Amy didn't know what to do. She hugged him tightly, caught between being worried for him and being stunned and overjoyed at his request.

"Sheldon…calm down. Please….of course I will. Of course I'll live with you," She reassured him.

Sheldon melted against her, dragging her down to a reclining position.

"Amy…you'll never understand what you mean to me. You'll never know how much I love you," He sobbed.

Amy began to cry herself. She had no idea where this was coming from, or what had set Sheldon off. Something life changing must have happened in Texas. Whatever it was, it had brought him back to her.

Completely.

"I know, Sheldon. I know how much you love me," She reassured him gently, pulling back to meet his gaze. She cradled his dear face in her hands, and reveled at how clear his blue eyes shined back at her.

"No…you don't. But someday…you will," He promised, kissing her passionately.

After a while, Sheldon fell into an exhausted sleep with Amy secure in his arms.

It would be the last time Sheldon Cooper ever doubted the phenomenon known as Fate.

A/N – I tried to warn you, and leave you clues. Amy's near death experience memory, the talk with her younger self…it was all there. I suggest you go back and read the first half of Chapter 12 for this to be made clearer. For those who guessed it, Bravo. For those who didn't, I'm hoping I've shocked you. (In a wonderful way). This was always the crux of the story. That beyond Faith or Science, there is that which cannot be explained. Their love is truly 'written in the stars'. They found each other, and Sheldon now knows nothing can pull them apart. He won't allow it, because he finally knows what a gift he's been given. Not once, not twice, but three times. And we all know how he loves the number three. My biggest inspiration for this story, aside from the characters themselves, was the book Somewhere in Time. Although the movie was beautiful, I think the book conveyed so much more emotion. I read it again last spring, before I began this story. The idea that not only soulmates can exist, but there may be forces at work happening to bring them together intrigued me. Who are we to say that such a thing couldn't happen? I think the fact it happened to Sheldon Cooper goes a long way to show how one person's journey can be altered for their growth. I've turned this man of Science upside down, so he would see the most important thing was right in front of him all along. Don't worry; he won't be turning in his white boards for hippie beads. But he will now have a more balanced view of life, opening him up to things he'd never dreamt of before (to quote Arthur back in Chapter 1). There are about 3-5 chapters left, including epilogue. Thank you again for taking this journey with me. Next update in about two weeks, after my out of town guests leave and family obligations die down. X


	37. Chapter 37

~Chapter 37~

A/N- Thank you everyone for the kind reviews last chapter. I am so pleased you enjoyed the plot twist.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…All my life I have known there's something more, love to blind me like the sun. Deep in dreams, I will wash upon your shore. Now I know that you're the one. And when I feel my baby calling it's like a whisper in a sand. When the softest rain is fallin' darling,I will crumble in your hand. And when all that's left is wonder and no need to understand. Well, this cool, clear water running will be all that I am…" Bonnie Raitt – Cool Clear Water

Amy woke the next morning to the sensation of something warm nuzzling into her hair. It took her hazy mind a few moments to catch up, but once it did, last night came back to her at a dizzying speed.

Sheldon had come to her apartment- very late, or very early deciding on the point of view- and had climbed into bed with her. His behavior was a paradox; anxious, yet calm. Guarded, yet amiable. When he had practically begged her to move in with him, she almost didn't believe her ears. Hours later, in the cold light of dawn, she was still hesitant to believe it.

Yet there he was, spooning her from behind, his long frame against hers and one of his arms protectively around her midsection.

They had spent the night in silence, barely moving as they clung to one another. Once, Amy could have sworn she heard Sheldon sobbing quietly. It would have worried her had he not stayed, burrowing into her warmth and sighing gently once he got himself under control.

_What had happened to him, his two days away back home in Texas? _She wondered. His abrupt departure, coupled with his impassioned return, had her mind in a tailspin. Sheldon Cooper was not one to hastily make such off the cuff decisions. She knew not what prompted his sudden trip, nor his change of heart about living together. But she knew one thing to her very core: let him come to terms with his decision at his own pace. Don't corner him, and don't make him feel like he was now in the spotlight.

Still, her fragile heart and soul which adored this man needed to know, for her own peace of mind, if what he asked her last night was a fluke- or a long thought out decision that he finally arrived at willingly. She couldn't bear it if she made assumptions and he turned the tables on her. She trusted Sheldon. And he had come so very far since last year. Yet her self-preservation instincts kicked in.

Amy shifted, Sheldon shifting with her. When he laid a sensual kiss against the warm flesh of her throat, Amy knew he was fully awake. And probably had been for a while. They lay silently for a moment, the shifting patterns of light beaming across her walls and the gentle sounds of their breathing resonating in the otherwise quiet room.

"Did you mean it?" She asked so softly, that if he hadn't been fused to her back, he would have missed it.

Sheldon inhaled deeply, laying a trail of soft kisses up her neck towards her ear. Amy shivered as he kissed her earlobe tenderly, tears gathering in her eyes. She didn't have to elaborate; Sheldon surely knew what her question entailed.

"Yes." He whispered, his voice sounding fragile yet sure. She could tell he was battling his own doubts and demons, probably worrying that she would change her mind just to punish him somehow. Yet punishment was the last thing on Amy's mind at the moment, as Sheldon gripped her waist and spun her around until she was lying flush against him. The look in his eyes was one she had never, ever seen before. She lost her breath as he gazed at her with reverence. And a hunger not simply wrought out of body, but of soul as well.

"Sheldon-"

He cut her off by lowering his forehead to hers, his lips trailing across her cheekbone. He pulled back after a moment to look at her deeply.

"If I lost you now…I would quite simply die," He murmured, tears springing to his blue eyes and making them look like sea glass. Amy stared at him, mesmerized, both by the look in his eyes and by his words. She licked her dry lips, at a loss of what to say.

"You…you're not going to lose me," She assured him passionately, reaching up a hand to stroke his brow. He closed his eyes at her tender touch, overcome with love for her.

"You were never in my plans. Falling in love was never going to happen to me," He whispered, his voice soft and gentle. She knew he spoke nothing less than the truth, no matter how direct. "But now that you're here…now that I know…I would rather die than to ever hurt you again, Amy. You mean the absolute world to me. I'm so sorry that I battled against you for so long. So sorry that I made you think you were less than. You're greater…greater than _anything_, Amy Farrah Fowler. I almost threw away something so precious…so irreplaceable. You have no idea the gift I've been given," He said, his tears clogging his throat.

Amy felt him shift against her, his body falling into the softness of hers as though they were missing puzzle pieces. Her heart was beating out of her chest, a symphony of song and feelings that she couldn't control. Sheldon lowered his lips to hers, the tenderness of his touch making her heart shatter.

Something was different…something _had_ changed. Another paradigm shift, perhaps. She had no idea what…but it was there.

Surrender.

Plain as day, in the way he drew her mouth against his own, his honeyed lips opening hers with passion. The way his velvety tongue stroked hers, tasting her. The way his hands refused to stay idle, instead roaming down her body with calculated sensuality. He drew her nightgown up and over her head, not wasting any time in taking a coral capped peak into his hot mouth. Amy cried out as he feasted on her, holding her close to him. The stubble on his face grazed against her tender flesh deliciously. Her body sang for him, and he listened, raptly.

"While flying home last night, all I could think about was you. All I could see in my mind was your face. The way you look at me when I touch you. The way you smile at me. I couldn't wait to see you, Amy. I need you so much," He said with feeling.

He teased her nipples with his tongue and lips, reveling in her softness and her scent. Her skin was warm and fragrant, overwhelming his senses. Amy lay helpless, paralyzed by her growing desire. When he reached down and pulled her bottom against him, allowing her to feel what she was doing to him, Amy couldn't take anymore.

"Sheldon…" She sighed, defenseless against his sensual onslaught. "I need you too…inside of me." Amy moaned, drawing her leg across his hip. She could feel him grow harder against her by the second. His eyes glittered at her in the morning light, his focus entirely on her.

"I want you so much, Amy. I never thought I would feel this way." He admitted, his face a mask of emotions.

Sitting up, he quickly removed his shirt and trousers, pulling down his boxers and reaching for her panties. He needed her. Right now. And she needed him just as badly.

In an instant, Sheldon hung his head as he remembered something through the haze of passion.

"I…I don't have any protection. I didn't think- I didn't know…" He began, cursing his lack of preparation.

Amy rapidly shook her head, breathing heavily and cutting him off.

"I'm on the pill, Sheldon. We don't need condoms. As long as you're alright with it, I'm protected." She whispered, kissing his neck and running her hands down his back. Sheldon groaned loudly as she nipped the tendon on his shoulder.

"Oh…god." He rasped, chills running down his body as she adjusted herself underneath him, and he reached down to test her arousal. She was so wet for him, her body warm and malleable. They stared into each other's eyes, each desperate to feel the connection. He guided himself into her gently, not wanting to hurt her. They both cried out at the bliss him being inside of her without a barrier provided. Sheldon thought he would lose his mind as her hot flesh gripped him.

"Dear Lord…Oh…" He yelled, the pleasure unbearable. He felt every single inch of her, sliding against every single inch of him. His eyes widened in shock at the sensation. Making love before this had been amazing. This though…this was _earth shatteringly_ amazing.

"Amy…oh…you…you," He stuttered, rocking his hips in a maddening tempo that was driving her further and further to her pinnacle. He reached down, sliding underneath her and grabbing her backside tightly as he moved within her. Needing her closer.

So much closer…

Amy wrapped her legs around his waist, the coil in her abdomen spiraling out of control. Sheldon was relentless as he drew out, plunging back in again and again.

"Sheldon…please," She moaned, throwing her head back into her pillow. He would oblige her. He would give her anything she needed.

"Anything, Amy…Oh…you feel like Heaven. So warm," He cried, speeding up his movements and thrusting his hips shallowly until he could feel her hot walls begin to tighten. The way they gripped his hardness had him shaking. God…she was truly made for him and him alone.

"You belong to me. Only me. Now and always. Forever," He said, emotion choking his words.

"Ahh…" She screamed as he pumped his hips and hit her just so, his hand reaching down to work her tender bud. Amy saw starbursts in front of her vision, the brightness too much to withstand. For a moment, she could see nothing but white light and hear nothing but a faint buzz as Sheldon catapulted her to another world. All the while, he held her tightly in his grip, marveling at her beauty and her passion and the fact she was his.

"Amy…" He moaned helplessly, releasing inside of her and feeling the warmth of that release seeping all around. It was the most fantastic feeling he'd ever experienced. The Sheldon part of his brain demanded he get up at once; clean off and erase the evidence of this mess. The animal part of his brain kept him where he was…joined with his mate as they both came down from their shared orgasm- clinging to each other and shaking with aftershocks.

He tried to catch his breath. It took a few attempts before he could speak without faltering.

"Did you…know…it would feel like that?" He managed, his hot breath across her face so intimate.

"Hmm?" She hummed, not fully comprehending his meaning. This wasn't the first time they'd made love.

"Without…without a condom?" He reiterated shyly. Amy could hardly answer him, instead nodding her head in the affirmative. After a few attempts, she felt more alive to speak.

"Yes. I'd…heard it was more intense. But…I had no idea," She said honestly.

Sheldon gasped quietly.

"More intense? Lord…you have _got_ to be kidding. There is no word for what _that_ was," He groaned, his head falling onto Amy's chest. She lovingly stroked his wet hair, drenched in sweat.

A primal, animalistic feeling of pride washed over him in that moment. He'd bedded his woman, thoroughly…spilling his seed inside of her. He _felt_ like an animal. Ready to bare his teeth at any predator or threat to her. And yet…He didn't feel any dumber. Any less than the genius he knew he was.

All of this time, he'd assumed giving in to his urges and making love to Amy would result in his demise. How utterly wrong he'd been. He felt more alive, more in tune, and more sharper now than he'd ever felt.

It was like the cosmos were opening up for him. He felt powerful. He felt invincible. He felt…love. Pure love. And it was the most remarkable feeling.

They lay joined for a few moments, kissing gently and stroking each other.

"Will you take a shower with me?" Amy asked quietly, relieved when Sheldon nodded against her chest.

He moved gingerly, not wanting to cause her discomfort as he disengaged from her. They both moaned softly at the incredible feeling.

"Are you able to walk?" He murmured gently, sliding his arm around her waist. Amy smiled at his tenderness, nodding her head. They made it to the bathroom, Sheldon turning the water to a comfortable temperature before allowing Amy in. Together, they washed off carefully before walking hand in hand back to the couch wrapped in the robes Amy kept on the back of the bathroom door.

They sat in silence a few moments, watching each other shyly.

"I don't know what came over me just now. I couldn't wait another second to make love to you," Sheldon admitted softly, hanging his head.

Amy reached out, laying a gentle hand on his cheek which had him looking back at her at once.

"I know exactly what you mean, Sheldon. I couldn't wait, either. And it was magical," She said, her voice sounding awed. Sheldon stared at her intently.

"Magical," He murmured, his eyes searching her face.

He wanted so _badly_ to tell her what had been revealed to him. But he knew, now wasn't the time.

The last thing he wanted Amy to think, was that he'd made a hasty decision borne out of confusion. The fact of the matter was, he had known for a very long time that he wanted to live with Amy. Finding out that he had been in possession of Amy's bottle all of this time had only sealed the deal in his mind. He would let this marinate, allowing himself time to savor the implications, before confessing to Amy the turn of events. It would have to be perfect for her, so she would know just how much he was committed to a life with her.

Sheldon took her hands in his own, bringing them to his lips and kissing her fingers one by one. Amy sat spellbound as she watched his sensual actions.

"I'll talk to Leonard today about making arrangements for him to move out. Perhaps by Christmas…you could move in?" He asked quietly, searching her face for any signs of distress or discomfort. He let out a sigh of relief when no such signs were forthcoming.

Amy's face lit up with happiness, and she bit her lip.

Move in by Christmas? That was less than two months away. She could hardly believe this was really happening. There would have to be amendments added to The Relationship Agreement. Discussion of sleeping arrangements. So many details, if she knew her boyfriend.

Then there was what this would mean for _her_. Losing her own space, living with Sheldon. It was scary, no doubt about that. But she thought of what she'd be gaining, and couldn't help but feel excited.

"Um…that sounds…good." She whispered, a slight giggle forcing its way out of her mouth. Sheldon smiled warmly at how obviously happy he had made her.

He resolved that he would make her this happy for the rest of his life.

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Penny carried a pitcher of strawberry Margarita's into the living room, setting it down on the coffee table with care. Amy carried a tray of homemade nachos and Bernadette brought up the rear with plates, napkins, and cutlery.

Girl's night had officially begun.

Bernadette had coaxed Howard to go to Leonard's to play video games, so the women could have their rap session at their place. They hadn't had a girl's night for weeks, long before Sheldon and Amy's trip to Anaheim.

"So…first order of business. Sheldon and Amy's anniversary weekend." Penny said once they were seated around the coffee table, her eyes alight with mischief.

"Didn't waste any time, I see," Amy said dryly, pouring a healthy glass of the lime and strawberry concoction and drinking it swiftly. Bernadette giggled while Penny shrugged.

"Come on, Ames. You have left us hanging long enough. It's been three weeks. Now spill."

Ever since their weekend together in Anaheim, something had changed immensely between their favorite Theoretical Physicist and Neurobiologist. The entire group had seen the change, but were trying to be respectful towards the couple.

_When they arrived home that Sunday night, Penny and Leonard were surprised when Amy accompanied Sheldon upstairs carrying a small suitcase. Sheldon greeted the pair before taking the case and bringing it to his room in silence. Amy remained in the living room, awkwardly balancing from foot to foot while Penny gazed at her peculiarly. _

"_Hey, bestie," Amy said as casually as she could, but Penny wasn't fooled. Not by a longshot. Her eyes widened to moonbeams when Amy's blush gave it away. _

"_Dear Lord," Penny whispered, sounding so Sheldon-like. Leonard's eyes flittered between the two women, not catching on to the punchline. Luckily, Sheldon returned at that moment, going into the kitchen to start the tea kettle. _

"_Tea?" Sheldon asked Amy sweetly, holding up the tea chest for her to peruse. She smiled in a daze, reaching blindly and pulling out a ginger peach. All the while, their gazes never left each other's. _

"_How was your trip, guys?" Leonard asked, throwing some popcorn into his mouth. No answer was forthcoming as the pair in the kitchen was in their own world. Penny motioned to them with her thumb, and Leonard could tell she was going to have a freak out any second. _

_Weeks later, nothing much had changed. Each time they were together, there was this tension in the air that you could cut with a knife. _

_Penny knew without a doubt that they had done…it._

Amy blushed again, taking another long gulp of the fruity libation to stall for time. Penny knew at once what she was up to, and narrowed her eyes shrewdly.

"Yeah…Penny's right. We have waited patiently for weeks. I think it's time you shared." Bernie said sweetly, taking a sip of her own margarita.

Amy sighed. There was a time she would have given her right foot to spill such juicy details about her sex life. The fact she even _had_ a sex life now made her flustered. Still…they weren't going to back down until she said something. Little did they know, she and Sheldon's weekend of discovery wasn't the only piece of information she was hiding.

After his trip to Texas, and returning to her begging her to live with him, Amy could hardly contain herself. But she didn't want to say anything to Penny until Leonard did. It was her apartment after all, that Leonard would be moving in to. It was just as much her decision as it was Leonard's.

"Alright. Because you are my best friends, I want to share this with you. But I _don't_ want you teasing me. _Or_ Sheldon. Promise," Amy warned, fixing her most stern glare at first Penny and then Bernadette. Each of the ladies in turn nodded raptly, completed focused on their studious friend.

Amy took a deep breath, blowing it out at once.

"Sheldon and I…we…consummated our…love."

The room was quiet. Too quiet. No one moved. Spoke. Breathed. Two sets of wide eyes fixed on hers. Finally, Penny sobbed and Bernadette gasped.

"Oh, my God. I knew it! The two of you…you've been acting so differently." Penny said in wonder, truly shocked. Amy smiled tentatively at her blond bestie.

"So…was it- good?" Bernadette asked cautiously. Penny's eyes widened at the look on Amy's face.

"Good? No. It was… _amazing_." Amy said quietly.

The girls looked at each other in awe before looking back to Amy.

"Really? Your first time? That is wonderful, Ames. Congratulations." Penny said with genuine happiness.

Amy nodded thoughtfully. She realized something she hadn't before. Both Leonard and Penny, and Howard and Bernadette had less than stellar first times together. Something dawned on her: they weren't in love at the time. She and Sheldon were. Perhaps that made all the difference.

"Yes…it was magical. So worth the wait." She said quietly. "It was passionate, and sexy…and just…I can't believe that something so perfect happened to _me_," Amy said with wonder.

Bernadette discreetly wiped her eyes with a tissue. She felt awful for the terrible things she'd said over the years to Amy about her sex appeal, especially where Sheldon was concerned. It was never Amy's fault that Sheldon was the way he was. And Bernadette had hinted that it was somehow connected to Amy's inability to arouse her boyfriend. She felt ashamed at herself for her callous words, especially in light of Amy's confession. The look on her face said it all: Sheldon had indeed rocked Amy's world, and they were obviously very deeply in love. Sheldon really _had_ just needed time to come to terms with his feelings.

"I'm so happy for you, Amy. Really," Bernadette whispered, and Amy nodded. Tears filled her eyes as she tried to convey to Bernadette that she understood.

After they all calmed down, Penny took another sip of her drink. She eyed her friend sideways, knowing there was something she was keeping from them. Deciding to put Amy's mind at ease, Penny leaned over and patted her leg.

"I know, Amy. About Sheldon asking you to move in. Leonard told me all about it the other night." Penny said gently.

Two sets of eyes swung to their blond friend.

"You…you know?" Amy asked meekly. Penny nodded and smiled widely.

"Yes. Sheldon already spoke with Leonard and asked him when he could move into my place. We kind of put two and two together. So…did he ask you? To move in with him?" Penny asked, her eyes wide. Amy smiled faintly.

"Yes. He did. I don't know how, or why…but when he came back from Texas, he just…asked me."

Penny looked at Bernadette with shock.

"And what did you say?" Penny asked, her voice tense.

"I said yes. Of course," Amy whispered, remembering Sheldon's tender plea when he woke her up that night. All of her fears melted away as he held her, kissed her, and begged her to move in with him. And in the morning…

"Wow." Bernadette whispered, shaking her head. It was clear how Sheldon had changed over the last year. Still…finally asking Amy to live with him was huge.

"So what happens now? When are you moving in?" Penny asked, taking a chip and dipping it in salsa before eating it. Amy shrugged at her question.

"I don't know. We haven't set a date yet, but Sheldon did ask me to find out if I could get out of my lease earlier. He sounded like he wanted me to move in around Christmas. That must mean something, right?" She asked hopefully. Penny smiled.

"Yeah. It does, Amy. And I'm so happy for you. Finally! Wow…Sheldon Cooper. Asking a girl to live with him…." Penny intoned, shaking her head. I never thought I'd live to see the day…"

Bernadette guzzled her margarita down before refilling her glass. "I can't believe it. I'm so proud of Sheldon. Good for him," She said with pride, her high pitched voice sounding faintly mother like.

"Are you happy, Ames?" Penny asked sweetly, eyeing her friend like a hawk.

"Yes. Very happy. I almost don't want to _be_ so happy," She said sadly, making the girls frown.

"Why would you say that?" Penny asked her seriously. Amy merely shrugged.

"Because…I've never _been_ so happy. What if the fates decide it's too much, and take it away? I…" She trailed off, discreetly wiping the tear that had gathered in the corner of her eye. She remembered Sheldon words that morning, how losing her now would kill him. She would fare no better, losing Sheldon. The deeper in love she fell, the more afraid she became.

Bernadette slid over closer to her friend while Penny stood up and patted her back soothingly.

"Hey…you have just as much right to be happy as anyone. More so. It's about time that fate gave you a break," Penny said gently, and Bernadette nodded. Amy chuckled through her tears.

"Yeah. You're right. Amy Farrah Fowler is going to have everything she ever wanted for a change. The man of her dreams, the highest honor in Science, and dear friends in which to share it." She declared, her voice stronger. The girls smiled and picked up their glasses.

"Here, Here. To Amy and Sheldon. _And_ magic," Penny said, her eyes misting in joy for her friend.

The three ladies toasted, holding their glasses aloft.

"To magic," Amy repeated, finally believing in it for the first time in her life.

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"So Stuart is having a mega Halloween party next week. Its last minute, but he didn't know if the shop would be up and running for it yet. We're all going, right?" Howard asked, eyes scanning his friend's for their thoughts.

Raj and Leonard smiled and shouted out chorus' of 'hell yeah' and 'can't wait', but Sheldon sat back in his spot and looked off in the distance thoughtfully. Leonard noticed his friend's distraction.

"Sheldon? Are you alright?" He asked him gently. Sheldon nodded, but still looked distracted.

"Yes, Leonard. I'm fine. I just…I don't know what to wear. Will the girls be joining us?"

Raj shrugged.

"I don't know if Emily would be up for doing it, but I'll ask her. Do you think we should keep it just the guys?" He asked expectantly. Leonard shook his head in the negative.

"Why? The last two times we went to costume parties with the ladies, it was great. Of course we should ask them to come," Leonard said seriously. He smiled when he remembered Penny dressed as a sexy cop the last time they went to Stuart's party. Howard nodded, thinking it would be great getting Bernadette to agree to wear a Black Widow costume.

Sheldon looked away absently. The last time he and Amy went to Stuart's party, they looked ridiculous. Well, in fairness…_he_ looked ridiculous. Amy looked amazing at always, even dressed as Raggedy Ann.

"Well, it's settled. If the girls want to join us, we'll discuss costumes. But right now…I want to know what's happening around here. What is the deal with you and Amy?" Howard asked, lowering his voice to a whisper. Leonard discreetly looked the other way as Sheldon's eyes widened.

"There's…no deal." Sheldon said, affronted. He stood up and went in the kitchen to escape Howard's scrutinizing gaze.

Howard turned to Leonard, raising his brows. Leonard offered him a good natured smile.

"Take it easy on him. This is a big step for Sheldon," Leonard whispered, and Howard nodded seriously.

"I know. That's why I wish he would talk about it. It's kind of like the elephant in the room here," Howard quipped, lowering his voice once Sheldon returned.

Sheldon sat back down, eyeing Howard sharply.

"Alright. In the interest of sharing, I will say this once and once only. Amy Farrah Fowler and I have decided to live together."

Howard and Raj gaped at Sheldon, but Leonard just bit his lip and smiled. Hearing those words out of Sheldon's mouth was something Leonard wasn't sure he'd ever get used to.

"You're…moving in together? Really?" Raj asked, starry eyed. Howard continued to sit there in shock. Sheldon leaned over, closing the hinge on Howard's jaw, and snapping him back to reality.

"Yes. Really. I know this is a big deal to everyone, but I would appreciate it if you didn't make too much out of it. Amy and I would like to do this privately. I ask you, as my friends, to not make this into a circus. Please." Sheldon asked, his normally condescending voice sounding humbled and small.

The three men nodded, Leonard patting Sheldon on the back.

"Of course, Sheldon. Anything you need. We're your friends. And we're very happy for you."

Sheldon nodded bashfully, taking a sip of his tea.

"Thank you." He said sincerely, and a strange quietness washed over the group.

Leonard realized, change was in the air. They were all growing up, moving on. He knew without a doubt that Sheldon would be proposing to Amy sooner rather than later. If their behavior lately was any indicator, things with them were progressing rapidly and wonderfully. He smiled as he looked around his little living room at his best friends in the world. The four of them had been through so much together, and the best was yet to come.

"I say we stop this girly nonsense and whip out the D &amp; D." Raj said, trying to sound manly. He reached over, grabbed his wine cooler and took a swig.

"Oh yeah…nothing girly about that," Howard joked dryly, motioning to the very fruity drink Raj was ingesting. Sheldon rolled his eyes, smiling.

Sarcasm…He was finally getting the hang of it.

And just like that, it was like old times at 2311 Los Robles Avenue.

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Amy sat at her desk, cataloguing some slides and labeling them when Dr. Gunderson rapped on her open door. She looked up, smiling.

"Hi, Sir. What can I do for you?" She asked him jovially, and the older man pointed to her office phone.

"You have a call on extension 4. She said her name was Vivian Ramirez." He said kindly, turning and leaving Amy sitting there startled.

_Vivian Ramirez_…

Amy removed her plastic safety goggles, laying them on the desk gently and removing her latex gloves. She pumped some hand sanitizer into her palms before picking up the line.

"Hello? Vivian?" She asked curiously, and the woman in question answered with a chuckle.

"Hi, Dr. Fowler. I'm sorry to call you at work, but we never exchanged cell numbers and I didn't know how to reach you," She said apologetically. Amy smiled, shaking her head.

"Oh, that's alright. Don't worry; I won't get sent to the Principal," She laughed, the other woman joining in.

"Are you sure? Because you can say its work related. One Doctor to another."

Her statement gave Amy pause.

_Dr.?_

"Um…am I missing something here?" She asked, chuckling nervously. Vivian giggled.

"I just got my MD. I'm graduating in two weeks from Medical School." She said happily, and Amy's eyes lit up at the sound of her new friend's voice.

"Oh, Vivian. That's amazing. Congratulations." She said sincerely. While she wasn't actually 'there' to experience Vivian's care, she had heard from Sheldon how wonderful she was. She deserved this, as Amy could certainly attest.

"Thank you, Dr. Fowler. I appreciate that. I was actually calling to get your address. I'd like to send you an invitation to my graduation. It's going to be held at UCLA."

Taken aback, Amy smiled.

"Oh! That's where I worked last before coming to Caltech.

"I know. You're kind of legendary there, you know," Vivian said kindly. "So, would you like to come?"

Amy smiled, though Vivian couldn't see.

"Really? Me? I…appreciate that, but…why me?" She asked, truly stumped. "Oh, and please, call me Amy."

"Alright, Amy. It's the strangest thing, really. I was at Pasadena General a few months back, doing rotations, when Dr. Preston mentioned you. He made you a case study. Anonymously, of course, but after what happened and being a part of it, I would have known your case anywhere. It got me to thinking that you, amongst so many I've treated, are to thank for what I've achieved. Don't get me wrong; I wish the method of help you provided could have been different. But the patient's I've treated have taught me so much. I just wanted to thank you. That, and I just really like you."

Amy had tears in her eyes as she listened to Vivian. Someone really liked her…she had waited years to be accepted by her peers; to have friends and a man to share her life with. The fact everything had come to pass for her left her feeling overwhelmed with gratitude.

"Wow…I don't know what to say, Vivian. I'm the one who should be thanking you. You had a part in saving my life. Without you, I wouldn't even be here," She said soberly.

"Well, then. I would love to have you. If you would like to attend. And you are most welcome to bring your boyfriend."

Amy smiled, wondering what Sheldon would say about this.

"I told him the day I came to visit you that I was in Med School. He said I had an excellent bedside manner," She chuckled, and Amy joined in. "Oh! You are still together, aren't you?" Vivian asked cautiously.

Amy bit her lip, grinning.

"Yes. Very much so," She answered softly, and Vivian smiled on the other end of the line.

"Ooh…it sounds like things are really going well?" She ventured. Amy giggled.

"Yes. Really well. I've been given a second chance. The last eight months have been wonderful; personally and professionally."

Vivian breathed a sigh of relief.

"That is just…so good to hear, Amy. When I think about how I found you, well…I'm very happy things worked out."

They were silent a moment, each collecting their thoughts. Amy gave Vivian her cell number and address, telling her to text her the details.

"Thank you for calling, Vivian. It was great hearing from you. I'm so happy you're achieving your dream."

"Thank you, Amy. I'll be in touch." Vivian said kindly, and Amy put the phone down.

That was really good news, she decided, wiping her eyes of the happy tears that had formed there.

The last three weeks since she and Sheldon's anniversary had been wonderful. Since his arrival back from Texas, he had been acting completely different. The way he looked at her, the way he talked to her, the way he touched her. It was done with a reverence that she would have never expected.

She had no idea what had prompted his sudden trip back home, or what transpired during his time away there. She badly wanted to ask him, but couldn't bring herself to do it. If and when he was ready to tell her, he would. It couldn't have been bad, judging by how wonderful he was behaving upon returning.

Waking up beside him that morning after he came home, Amy felt a monumental shift had taken place. He had asked her to move in with him! Begged her to, in fact. She didn't want to label it, give name to what she thought it was. She just wanted to bask in it, let whatever it was happen naturally.

They had made love only twice more since that morning, both times at her apartment so not to incite gossip with the gang. Their newfound intimacy was like a separate being; full of life and presence.

Amy found herself thinking of Sheldon all day long; while in the shower, while at work, while shopping for groceries. When they were together, it was like this heavy magnet was pulling them together, and they were helpless to resist.

Leonard had mentioned at dinner the other night that he was thinking of spending four nights a week at Penny's apartment while he moved his belongings over there gradually. The entire table looked over to Sheldon at his statement, but Sheldon kept eating his Thai, unaffected. He glanced up, meeting Leonard's eyes, and nodded.

There was this undercurrent between her and Sheldon that never existed before. A real and emotional connection that she didn't know how to decipher. If she were being honest with herself, she had the feeling that Sheldon was going to propose to her. Trying not get her hopes up, Amy shook her head clear of those wayward thoughts. There was _no_ way that was happening…

At least, not in the foreseeable future.

Baby steps, Fowler…

Coming back to herself, she grabbed a fresh pair of gloves and put her safety goggles back on.

A/N – Thank you for reading. Hold tight as the last few chapters are posted; they're only halfway written, and I obviously don't want to rush the ending of this story. Don't worry, though. I won't make you wait too long.


	38. Chapter 38

~Chapter 38~

A/N – Thank you everyone for the sweet reviews and for your continued patience. Fasten your seatbelts, friends – you're about to see a Sheldon Cooper you haven't seen before (at least not here). Don't judge him too harshly. He's in love, after all. All of these new urges are just bubbling up to the surface. As my story nears its close, there must be _one_ chapter that's playful and downright sexual. They've earned it, and at this point in their relationship, it is no longer what I would consider to be OOC. I've taken them on a rollercoaster of emotions, and this will be no different. And it's Halloween, after all. We'll be returning to tender and sweet again for the remaining chapters, so don't worry. If you like naughty, this chapter is for you. :) – If you don't, well… Hide under the bed for a while. We'll wait for you ~ Legere Vestris Periculo : Read at Your Own Risk. :)

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…If there are boundaries, I will try to knock them down -I'm latching on, babe, now I know what I have found - I feel we're close enough, I wanna lock in your love babe. I think we're close enough. Could I lock in your love, baby? Now I've got you in my space, I won't let go of you (never)-Got you shackled in my embrace, I'm latching on to you…" Disclosure/Sam Smith – Latch

A week later, Halloween had arrived and the gang found themselves preparing for Stuart's party. As in everything they did, meticulous planning and multiple conversations abounded.

While previous years proved dressing as a group was successful, they realized they didn't have enough time to join forces on suitable costumes. Unless, of course, they went again as the Justice League. Raj was dead set against being Aqua Man, and they would still have to find someone to be Superman. Plus there was the added dilemma of what to do with Amy and Bernadette.

The gang debated separately as sexes, and then later as couples, about costuming.

In the end, Bernadette and Howard decided to go as Iron Man and Black Widow, Howard already having that cool Iron Man helmet. Raj and Emily decided on The Joker and Poison Ivy. Leonard and Penny decided on Spiderman and Gwen Stacy. She was annoyed that she had to wear a long wig since cutting off her blond locks, but at least she looked the part.

That left Sheldon and Amy. Decidedly…undecided.

There were many options to choose from, but Sheldon felt pressured. Work had been taking up a fair bit of his time, as it had Amy's, and the two could not come to an agreement on how to dress, or put time aside at night to work on the costumes.

As October 31st drew closer, Sheldon simply decided to dress as Mr. Spock, paying homage to Leonard Nimoy's recent passing. He had told Amy who he was going as, of course, but Amy was hush-hush about her own costume. She only said she was still undecided, but would dress accordingly. In true Sheldon fashion, he pitched a fit and nearly had a panic attack.

_Dress accordingly_? That's _all_ she was going to say? Didn't she know how important it was to match, or to at least be on the same page?

Sheldon feared it was the Raggedy C-3PO incident all over again. Yet he trusted Amy, knowing she would not lead him down a bad path. He supposed if she decided to dress as Lt. Uhura, it wouldn't be so bad. He admired the character, at least. Perhaps that was it; she wanted to be Uhura because in the new version, she and Spock were an item.

Sheldon felt marginally better, although not knowing for sure was certainly unnerving him.

Earlier in the evening on Halloween night, the group had left to head to the shop leaving Sheldon to wait alone at 4A for his girlfriend. He gave himself a once over in the mirror, impressed with the way his eyebrows arched and his ears pointed. He didn't have to wear a wig, simply dying his short cropped hair temporarily black. He was certain if his career in Physics ever came to an end, he would surely have a future in makeup arts. After fifteen Comic Cons, he was a master.

A knock startled Sheldon out of his thoughts, and he made his way to the door quickly. He opened it to find Amy standing there in her blue trench coat, her costume hidden from view.

"Happy Halloween, Dr. Cooper." She drawled, offering Sheldon a prim smile. He returned it wearily, feeling a strange sense of déjà vu. If she had strayed from 'dressing accordingly', and was wearing her schoolgirl costume under that coat, then he was a dead man.

"Good evening, Dr. Fowler." He said quietly, admiring how lovely she looked.

Her hair was swept up in a charming updo, long curly tendrils framing her face and eyes, which were sans glasses tonight. She was wearing cat's eye makeup and false, plush eyelashes. As she was dressed in 60's hair and makeup, she must be an original series character, he reasoned. He breathed a sigh of relief that he wouldn't have to be tempted all evening seeing her in that short, plaid skirt. He could only gape at her, his eyes roaming the length of her body trying desperately to figure out her attire. When his eyes landed on her shoes, he gulped.

Knee high black leather go-go boots. She _could_ be Uhura, but…

For a genius, it took a moment for the truth to hit him. Knee high boots, 60's style hair and makeup…

Lord have mercy. No…

"You didn't…you're not…" He stuttered, and as Amy unbelted her coat and unfastened the buttons, the telltale blue fabric coming into view, Sheldon's entire body began to tingle.

Nurse Christine Chapel. Good Lord…

Sheldon involuntarily released a groan, and the sound shot straight to Amy's stomach.

"Sheldon? Are you upset?" Amy asked in concern, her brows narrowing at the look on Sheldon's face. The first time she wore this costume, Sheldon seemed to enjoy it. A _lot_. So she decided to wear it tonight. She'd have minimal preparation, other than the hair and makeup.

Amy had to admit, she found the concept of Spock's attraction to Nurse Chapel interesting. And it was clear on the show that the blond nurse had it bad for the Vulcan Science Officer. Sheldon's eyes glittered as he took in Amy's costume, unable to even formulate a rational thought.

It was _much_ worse than the schoolgirl outfit. Because even though most men have a schoolgirl fantasy, he wasn't most men. He was Sheldon Cooper. And Sheldon Cooper had a Nurse Chapel/Spock fantasy.

"Upset?" He choked out, barely able to tear his gaze away from her curvaceous body showcased in the blue polyester dress. It looked…_different _somehow. Tighter, perhaps? As Amy hadn't gained any weight recently, that could only mean one thing: She had obviously altered the dress, taking it in. It outlined her curves to perfection, stretching across her bust enticingly before dipping to form fit to her waist and flaring out against her amazing hips. And as his eidetic memory never failed him, he noted with agitation that it was at least 1 inch shorter than it was before.

Oh, Lord…

That little _vixen_…

"Sheldon?" She asked again, and he could tell she was concerned about his reaction.

"No. Definitely _not_ upset," He reassured her, clearing his throat noisily.

Amy smiled slyly, realizing the effect this was having on Sheldon. Was he…blushing? She waited with calmness as he continued to stare at her.

"You look…different…than last time." He pointed out, his breath quickening.

Amy nodded.

"Yes…I did my hair and makeup more in keeping with her look at the time," Amy pointed out, and Sheldon had to agree the effect was stunning. "I hope I look authentic. I know her hair was blond, but I couldn't do anything about that without a wig," She said regretfully. Sheldon gulped and nodded quickly.

"Oh…yes. Very authentic. The darker hair doesn't matter at all," He agreed, grabbing his keys and wallet from the bowl quickly. He had to get out of here before he did something crazy. Like drag her back to his bedroom and rip off that shorter, slightly tighter dress.

"Come on, Amy. We'll be late if we don't leave now," He said tightly, not sparing her a glance as he walked out, waiting for her to follow him over the threshold.

Amy followed Sheldon out of the apartment, her head held high. She had already turned him on his ear, and the night had just began.

_Time to even up the status quo again_, she thought in humor.

They were relatively silent the two mile drive to the shop, Amy feeling Sheldon's eyes on her the whole time.

What she didn't know was that his gaze was riveted to her legs, and how the boots molded to them. And that his gaze trailed up those legs, to her thighs, his body reacting to the fact the shorter hemline showed so much skin.

Since becoming intimate with his girlfriend a month ago, Sheldon found he couldn't stop thinking about her skin, and how it felt against his own. The contrast of her soft, hairless skin and his courser, hairier skin was the subject of many a night's musings. Everything about Amy was sensual. She was like a long acting drug that once ingested, wouldn't leave his system no matter what he tried. He could handle the onslaught of emotions that stirred when he kept himself busy. Or he wasn't in her presence. But at times, like now, it was all he could do not to kiss her senseless.

Something told him though, that Amy wouldn't mind very much if he did.

When they arrived at Stuart's, it was filled to capacity with people curious to see the new shop, as well as compete in the costume contest. Amy couldn't believe her eyes when she walked in, seeing Penny, Bernadette and Emily in their costumes. They, in turn, had the shock of their lives seeing Amy dressed so provocatively. Leonard and Howard were more discreet, but Raj did a double take seeing Amy's costume. A fact not unnoticed by Sheldon.

"Look at you, Amy! You look like something out of a Nancy Sinatra video. Very sexy," Penny drawled, smirking in Sheldon's direction while Leonard grinned politely. It was Raj who gulped and fell mute like he did in the old days. Emily rolled her eyes, grabbing her boyfriend by the hand and leading him towards the bar area.

"Come on, Casanova. Let's get some liquid courage into you," She said, undeterred by his obvious like for Amy's costume. Bernadette playfully put her hands on her hips, thrusting her ample bust out in her black widow costume and staring at Howard with a smirk. Behind his helmet, he smiled casually.

"What?" He questioned, knowing full well what Bernadette was implying.

Amy had never felt so attractive in her life. She giggled sweetly, reaching out and taking Sheldon's hand.

"Come on, Mr. Spock. Let's dance," She crooned, happy when Sheldon didn't hesitate but took her hand tighter and led her out to the makeshift dancefloor.

As the evening progressed, Sheldon noticed more and more men were eyeing his girlfriend. Her costume wasn't even that provocative. She was covered in all the necessary places. Yet something about her screamed…sex. Plain and simple. He felt like a wolf protecting his lamb as fool after fool asked her to dance, sidled up next to her wanting to talk, or attempted to bring her some refreshment.

Each time, she'd politely decline, and in some cases, not so politely. She tried to stick to Sheldon as much as possible, her heart beating wildly every time she looked at him.

The evening got worse as Stuart came over to greet them, his eyes suspiciously fixed upon Amy. It looked like Sheldon wasn't the only nerd with a Nurse Chapel fantasy.

Bidding their peddler of books friend goodbye, Sheldon put his arm around her, drawing her away.

"Shall I get you some punch, Amy?" He asked her sweetly, delighted when Amy smiled widely. Any time she smiled at him like that, it warmed his heart and made him feel fifty feet tall.

"Thank you, Sheldon." She whispered, leaning back against the wall and admiring everyone's costumes as Sheldon hesitantly left her side to procure her beverage.

Sheldon waited his turn at the refreshment table, finally able to pour himself and Amy a glass of punch. Leonard came up beside him, patting him on the back.

"Sheldon? Are you alright?" Leonard asked him. Sheldon grimaced as he turned to his friend.

"Am I alright? Would _you_ be alright if every man in the room was making eyes at your woman?" He asked haughtily. Leonard merely smiled.

"Sheldon…you forget who I'm engaged to. I've spent the last eight years trying to shield Penny from advances. Look, for what it's worth? Don't get jealous over every man that looks at Amy. Be proud that she is so attractive. She only has eyes for you, anyway," Leonard reasoned.

Sheldon sighed, his eyes drifting over to Amy as she stood talking to a woman dressed as Jane to her boyfriend's Tarzan.

"I know you're right, Leonard. It's just…rude of them. When I was single, I never hit on women like that. Especially if I knew they were taken," He growled, his eyes narrowing as he noticed Wil Wheaton in Amy's vicinity.

Leonard tried to hide his grin.

"Yeah, well…when you were single, you weren't really that interested in women," Leonard chimed humorously, earning a glare from his roommate.

It was strange seeing Sheldon worked up over this. A year ago, he never would have even noticed such a thing. He marveled at how far Sheldon had come.

"I know, Buddy. But guys will be guys. Listen, don't worry about Amy. She's a good woman. Just relax and enjoy yourself tonight, okay?" He asked, offering Sheldon a calming smile. He returned it, nodding his head.

"Okay. I'll try. Thank you, Leonard."

As he made his way back to Amy for the announcement of best costumes of the night, the air left his lungs in a whoosh. Wil Wheaton had indeed come from out of nowhere, and was standing _way _too close to his woman for his comfort.

"Amy? I have your drink," Sheldon said, his gaze swinging to Wil's and pinning him with a glare. Wil seemed oblivious to Sheldon's ire. Wil himself was dressed as Captain America. Sheldon snorted silently.

"Oh, hey Sheldon. Cool costume. I was just telling Amy that her Nurse Chapel costume is very authentic. And I know a thing or two about Star Trek," He intoned, fixing them both with a large, toothy smile.

Amy smiled politely, but Sheldon frowned. He knew all too well about Wil Wheaton's knowledge about nearly _everything_, the pompous egomaniac. He couldn't believe he scorned Amy once to go to Hometown Buffet with this rake.

"Yes, well…thank you for that. It's time for best costume, so if you'll excuse us," He said tightly, taking Amy's hand gently and leading them away. Amy followed dutifully, holding her punch in the other hand. She didn't notice the way Sheldon put down his own punch on a nearby table, balling his now free hand into a fist.

He had to remind himself next year that if they attended another costume party, Amy would have to dress in wool from head to toe.

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The apartment was dark and quiet when they arrived home, Leonard obviously spending the night at Penny's. It was well past 11, but tenants in the apartment above them were having a Halloween party themselves, the music faintly coming through the walls.

Sheldon and Amy had gotten into the habit of sleeping over at each other's apartment's now, even going so far as to leave a few items at the others. Amy knew it was Sheldon's way of taking baby steps on the moving in issue. The fact he had cleared out 2 drawers for Amy and part of his closet now housed some of her clothing spoke volumes to her. He was trying to acclimate himself to sharing space together, and it touched her to know he was making a concerted effort.

As Amy went to the kitchen to put the kettle on, Sheldon sat down in his spot, leaning back and sulking. Amy frowned at him. He had seemed strangely distant all evening, although he wasn't acting angry. At least, not towards her.

More than once tonight, she caught him glaring at various people. Mostly men, she ruminated. At first she wondered if it was because he thought their costume choices were better than his. He barely spoke towards the end of the night, and when she asked him if he were ready to leave, he couldn't rush out of the shop fast enough.

_What in the world was going on in his head_, Amy wondered. Sheldon loved Halloween. Loved cosplay. And loved the Comic shop. Why did he seem to have such a miserable time tonight? She secretly feared he was angry at her for not putting more effort into her own costume. The fact they were Spock and Nurse Chapel was wonderful, at least to her. He met her eyes briefly across the room before looking away quickly.

"Sheldon, what is it? Are you upset that we didn't win the costume contest?" She ventured, confused when he shook his head in the negative. He wasn't even looking at her, simply resting his head in his hand glumly. Amy abandoned the tea she was making, and came to sit beside him.

"Did you not enjoy yourself tonight?" She asked gently, placing her hand on his knee and squeezing softly. Sheldon's eyes focused on her hand, and he bit his lip.

"Yes, it's just..." He said in a huff, tsking lowly.

"Just?" She echoed, trying and failing to catch his eye. Hesitantly, Sheldon looked at her, but his eyes looked dull and troubled.

"I just can't believe all of those men had the nerve to hit on you tonight. They knew I was your boyfriend. It was just so disrespectful of them. Even Wil Wheaton. What was he thinking, flirting with you? How _dare_ he?" He asked angrily.

Sheldon's confession simultaneously stunned and thrilled Amy. He had rarely gotten jealous in the past over her; well, there was that one time with Zach. And with Stuart…oh, and the night he confronted her about Burt…but still. She could see without a doubt that Sheldon had become more attentive towards her as of late. She nodded slowly, trying to assuage her boyfriend's anger.

While flattered that the partygoers seemed to like her costume, the last thing she wanted was a bunch of strange men ogling her. Especially Wil Wheaton. She knew Sheldon and Wil's tentative history, and didn't like how the man Sheldon once idolized treated him so disdainfully at times.

"Sheldon…Wil was just being nice, given his association with Star Trek. We don't have the most cordial history, as you well know. As for the others…I paid them no mind." She said gently, trying to put his mind at ease. It didn't seem to work as Sheldon's face grew even darker.

"Sheldon? Please talk to me," She implored, startled when his eyes flew to hers.

"Did you…like the attention?" He asked cautiously. Amy's eyes widened at his tone of voice. He sounded hurt. And jealous. But that was crazy. He knew her better than that, right?

"Did I like the attention? No. No, Sheldon. I didn't. I don't like the idea of strangers staring at me." She said honestly, her own voice strong and firm.

Sheldon bit his lip, nodding slowly.

"It just seemed that you did, is all. You couldn't stop smiling all night," He said, his voice downcast.

Amy narrowed her eyes, the obvious reason for her happiness so clear. At least, to her. She scooted closer to Sheldon, happy when he didn't move away.

"That was because of _you_, you silly Vulcan. I dressed in this costume for _you_, Sheldon. _Only _for you. I knew you liked it, so I wanted to surprise you. I was thrilled that I could wear this again, and you dress as Spock. Couldn't you tell, that I couldn't keep my eyes off of you all night?" She asked him.

Sheldon gaped at her, stunned. He had to admit, he _had_ noticed her eyes on him most of the night. But he was too busy ogling her and being jealous over men fawning over her to take it in properly. She had dressed like Nurse Chapel for _him_.

She had absolutely no idea just _how_ much he liked it. How the first time she wore it for him, as he lay on the couch beneath her as she did her faux medical readings, his eyes burned a path beneath her short dress. It was the first time he'd ever seen his girlfriend dressed so alluringly. It stirred his loins and made his heart pound wildly. Of course at the time, it was to increase his affections toward her. Little did she know how much she had succeeded in her efforts.

"Really?" He asked, a glimmer of hope in his voice. The shyness on his face was so sweet to witness. Yet he still seemed hesitant to believe her.

Amy smiled slightly as an idea popped into her head. Standing up, she made her way to the front door, turning the deadbolt and fixing the chain. She dimmed the lights a fair bit and Sheldon watched from the couch, his eyes growing wider by the second as she approached him, but didn't come all the way back.

"I have something to confess, Mr. Spock." She said airily as she stood still, balancing her weight from boot to boot. Sheldon visibly gulped, keeping in character by trying to keep his face neutral.

"Oh? And that being what, Nurse Chapel?" He asked thickly, his eyes sliding down her body before returning to her face.

"Of all the crew members that come into sick bay, you have always been my favorite. I see you come through the doors, and my heart starts to beat faster. No one else has ever moved me like you do. _Ever_," She emphasized, staring him dead in the eyes. She could see Sheldon swallow roughly, his Adams apple bobbing up and down quickly.

"Is that so?" He asked unemotionally, trying desperately to sound unaffected by her words.

Amy nodded, looking at Sheldon from beneath her lashes.

"Yes…Sir. I know many men like the way I look. It's a hazard of being blessed with good looks, I'm afraid. But I don't care what any other man thinks of me. Only you, Sir. I'm sorry if I made you think otherwise. While it's true; Captain Kirk, Dr. McCoy, and other crew members are handsome men…they don't hold a candle to you. Perhaps…I allowed flattery to get the better of me tonight. Maybe I _did_ like their attention, just a little. I should be taught a lesson, Mr. Spock."

Sheldon did a double take at Amy's words. _Taught a lesson?_

"And…how do you propose I do that? Teach you a…lesson?" Sheldon asked, his voice cracking. Amy smiled, pretending to ponder his question.

"You could punish me for my wayward thoughts. I won't fight you. Every naughty nurse deserves a good spanking every now and then," She said breathily, biting her lip enticingly.

Sheldon swallowed, letting out a gasp. Dear Lord…

_Spanking?_

He shifted in his spot, feeling the stirrings of arousal begin in his belly.

"I…what have you done to incite a spanking?" He asked her quietly, afraid to hear the answer. Beads of sweat began to break out on his forehead. Amy took two steps closer, her eyes never leaving his.

"I've had the most…sinful thoughts. About you. About us. I know you are the Enterprise's First Officer, and above my station. But I can't help how I feel about you. I dream of you, Mr. Spock. I fantasize about you touching me. Taking me. I want you. So badly sometimes I can't even think straight. I know I've compromised you by allowing my feelings to show. I know you could never love me or want me as much as I want you. But I'm only human. I'm just a woman- flesh and blood," She said her voice low.

Sheldon shuddered, his throat flexing involuntarily. So she wanted him. _Only _him. And she wanted to play…

He would play, alright. Finding his voice, he licked his lips. The way she was looking at him was making his body throb.

"You're certainly correct in that assessment, Nurse Chapel. You are a woman. _All _woman." He rasped, pleased when her skin blushed a lovely shade of pink.

He looked away a moment, calculating a plan.

"Are you willing to do _anything_ to please me?" He asked her tightly, lowering his gaze to floor in a dismissive way. Amy's blood zinged as she realized he was playing along. When he looked at her again, she thought she would catch fire.

_Bingo._

"_Anything_," She emphasized, toying with the collar of her dress.

Sheldon felt a tightness in his groin as he studied her. Submissive yet strong. Amy, yet…not. His mouth watered and he felt his jaw slacken at the sexual tension racing through his body. He had never felt so jealous before of all the attention she'd received tonight. And while he knew he was under no threat, the fact remained that his body, heart, and soul wanted to lay claim to his mate.

"Come here," He ordered without emotion, eyes dilating as he watched her hips sway as she walked. She wasn't wearing tights tonight, and the little swatch of skin between the dress hem and the tops of her knee boots was driving him insane. He wanted to put his hands there and caress her soft skin.

"Stop."

She obeyed, mere inches from him. Sheldon scooted down in his spot deeper, making himself more comfortable. Amy balanced from foot to foot, her eyes taking him in from head to toe. She secretly loved him dressed as Spock. Mostly because it was a character that made Sheldon feel confident. And confident Sheldon was sexy Sheldon.

Sheldon in turn eyed her up and down, not saying a word. The tension was building and Amy felt as though Sheldon was undressing her with his eyes. The warmth that was always present in her body nowadays burst into a wildfire.

When he opened his mouth and spoke, Amy nearly lost her footing.

"Pull your panties down." He said roughly, his voice betraying his character. He licked his lips again, reminding Amy of a wolf. Her eyes widened but Amy obeyed, sliding her hands up her hips underneath the short Federation dress and hooking into the waistband of her undergarment. She slowly slid the silk down her thighs, anticipation making her breath come out in pants. Sheldon kept his eyes on hers the whole time, stopping her when the garment reached as far as her knees.

"That's far enough," He murmured, his eyes sliding down to see the silk trapped between her knees before returning to her green orbs and fixing her with a steely gaze. "Now…lay across my lap. Face down."

Sheldon's voice sounded foreign and strange. It turned her on more than anything to know she was having such an effect on him. Leonard had mentioned once that Sheldon was an alpha male. There was no denying that now. Amy _wanted_ him to take total control. She wanted desperately to unleash that alpha male inside of him, have him channel all of his energy on her. She craved it. She didn't know how far he'd take this little game, but she was invested to go all the way. And then some.

"Slide lower," He coaxed, holding her hips in his hands to assist her. His voice dripped sensuality, and Amy's heart skipped a beat.

Amy's pulse began to race as she realized the implications of his demand. Sheldon had never spanked her bare behind before. The idea excited her probably more than it should have. She could feel her wetness begin to pool and closed her eyes as a wave of arousal overwhelmed her. Sliding lower as he commanded, she was enthralled to note he was just as affected by her. The way his body reacted to hers never failed to undo her. Her tummy rubbed against his trapped hardness as she slid down, making herself comfortable.

"Mmm…Mr. Spock. You feel so good." She purred, her lower body undulating against him and causing her already obscenely short dress to rise. Sheldon groaned as her bare thighs came into view. His eyes trailed over her graceful back curve, down her generous hips to the beautiful curves below. The bottom of her posterior peeked out, the sight causing Sheldon's manhood to strain painfully against his black pants.

"You _should _be punished simply for having a tempting body like this," He whispered, his right hand sliding up the back of her leg to the juncture of her thighs, before gripping the round flesh there. Her skin was soft and warm, and his touch made her break out in goosebumps. Amy moaned as he squeezed the globe gently, his fingers brushing against her wet sex.

"Oh…Mr. Spock…yes," She moaned as Sheldon cupped his palm, bringing it down on her with a gentle smack. The motion caused her to grind down against him, making his ever hardening manhood strain painfully.

"You're enjoying this, aren't you? I always knew you would bring about my demise. The way you come to the bridge to tempt me, knowing I'm a Vulcan and am above such petty emotions…" He whispered hotly in her ear, spanking her again. Her taut flesh bounced against his palm alluringly. Sheldon reached over, sliding the dress higher to fully expose her to his hungry gaze. He knew her bare womanhood was rubbing against his pants and that inflamed him even more.

_What is happening to me_? He wondered, the thick haze of sexual arousal beginning to infiltrate his senses. His mind shot back to another time, another place…spanking Amy for lying to him. Not understanding at the time just how much it had aroused him. Being able to have touched her so intimately, even over her nightgown, after years of denying he wanted to. He understood now, though. And he _liked_ it.

Her posterior had always tempted him, from the very beginning. He spanked her once again, his fingers sliding down and dipping in to her growing wetness as he dragged his hand across her flesh. She tried to keep still, but the way he was touching her was driving her mad.

"Does this excite you?" He whispered huskily, running his hand across her backside enticingly before administering another gentle smack.

"Yes," She moaned, trembling. Sheldon smiled wickedly.

"Do you feel what you're doing to me?" He groaned in her ear, moving slightly and allowing her feel his erection. "How badly do you want me, Nurse Chapel?" He murmured, gripping the arm of the couch as Amy reached down and fondled his hardness.

"_Very _badly, Mr. Spock." Amy moaned, sliding her hand up and down his shaft through his pants. "If I don't touch you, I'll go mad with desire," She said.

Sheldon gulped, otherwise keeping his poker face intact.

"We couldn't have that, now. It would be…illogical." He intoned, using both hands to caress her naked flesh.

Amy bucked against him wildly. She rubbed herself against the rough fabric of his pants, trying to garner some relief. Sheldon kept her at bay, moving away from her as she sought him out, a well-timed symphony never in her favor. This was the naughtiest thing she'd ever done, and she felt her body was reaching or a delicious place she'd never been before.

She never realized how…sexy…cosplay was. The fact it was Spock and Nurse Chapel only fueled her excitement. She knew this was a definite fantasy for Sheldon. He thrust himself in her palm gently, his mouth falling open as Amy unzipped his fly and reached inside to grip him.

"Yes. Touch me," He crooned, growling when Amy squeezed his testicles gently. This earned her another gentle slap and another squeeze. Delirious, Sheldon ran his palm down her center, his fingers toying with her clitoris.

"I can feel how aroused you are, Nurse Chapel." He groaned, knowing that her wetness and warmth felt incredible. He was dying to bury himself inside of her and never come back.

"Yes. _You've_ done this to me, Mr. Spock." Amy cried, the passion in her voice real. Sheldon leaned down, his lips brushing against her ear.

"Tell me. Tell me what I've done to you. Tell me how much you want me," He whispered, one hand still buried in her secret place while the other reached underneath her and fondled her nipples through her dress. Amy rolled herself on his lap, on the verge of orgasm.

"Oh…oh Spock. I want you so much. I need you. Please," She begged, arching her back and pushing her plush flesh further into his hands.

Sheldon couldn't take any more. He had wanted to touch her all night, and knowing she was aroused for him made him crazy. He swatted her gently again, this time his fingers making contact with her most tender flesh. Amy cried out, the gentle pain startling her. It felt…surprisingly good.

"What do you need, Nurse Chapel? Say it." He whispered, squeezing her again and giving her one last smack. The sting felt wonderful and Amy purposefully squirmed against Sheldon's hardness.

"You. Inside of me. Now." She said with surety. Sheldon looked down at her, how her eyes were nearly black with passion and her skin red with desire.

Wordlessly, he pulled her up to stand on wobbly legs. He dragged her the short distance to his bedroom, pulling her inside and locking the door behind him. He yanked her against him, and Amy moaned as his hardness rubbed against her center. She was desperate for him to be inside of her, but he seemed to have other ideas.

"This needs to go," He rasped, grasping the hem of her dress and yanking it over her head. Amy stood helplessly silent beneath his perusal of her. She was shocked when he quickly undid her bra, but the shock gave way to pleasure as Sheldon drew his hands across her naked body in slow, measured strokes. The peaks of her breasts were hard, and her posterior was red, his handy work visible. He helped her step out of her panties, throwing them on the floor once off. He slowly fell to his knees before her, fixing her with a look that could peel paint from walls.

"Don't _ever_ push me past my limits again, Nurse Chapel. You may find yourself in a situation you aren't prepared for," He warned her harshly, and without another word plunged his tongue into her wet depths.

"Uh…"Amy gasped, nearly falling down at the pleasure Sheldon was bringing forth out of her. He reached around, grabbing her ass and pulling her into his mouth in decadence. Amy placed both hands on his shoulders, squeezing tightly as he feasted upon her. Every nerve ending in her body was on high alert. She dared to open her eyes and look down, feeling the first spasms of orgasm at seeing her beloved Sheldon's face buried between her thighs. He pulled away, his mouth wet and his pupils blown. He gave her a long, sensual lick before clamping down on her clitoris and sucking hard. She tasted like honey. And it was all for him. He looked up, his eyes drugged as they met hers. Amy nearly shattered.

"Jesus…oh, my…." Amy screamed, trembling and coming so hard Sheldon had to hold her steady. As she came down from her high, he gently nibbled her lips, before placing soft and sensual kisses along her inner thighs.

Sheldon was so hard he hurt. His body was thrumming. He had to make love to her. Right now.

"Lie down on the bed. On your stomach," He whispered, and she wordlessly complied. He was dying to try this; had secretly dreamt of it. He was finished worrying about being a pervert. His girlfriend possessed a body so appealing, and he was finally allowing himself to enjoy it.

Sheldon undressed quickly, scooting down until he was straddling her knees. Her body was on full display for him. God…she was incredible. He had long admired that piece of her anatomy, and he long desired to shower it with attention. He felt so naughty doing this but couldn't bring himself to care.

"Do we need a condom?" He asked her softly, and Amy shook her head.

"No. No condom. I want to feel you. All of you," She whimpered wantonly. Sheldon's breath stuttered in his chest.

Reaching up, he caressed the fleshy globes with both hands, marveling at how her womanhood opened to him as he did so. He could see copious amounts of moisture there already, enthralled that his playful discipline had caused her such arousal. Her orgasm had made her slick and wet. He couldn't wait to feel it surround him.

"Jesus," He muttered under his breath, feeling his erection throb. He continued to caress her with long, sensual strokes, Amy squirming beneath him. Leaning over her, he rested his weight on top of her gently, and Amy whimpered.

"I'm going through Pon Farr, Nurse Chapel. I need your help. I have all of these animalistic feelings inside of me. I'm going insane with lust. Save me. Help me. Let me slake my thirst," He groaned, rocking against her. Amy shifted her hips and Sheldon slipped inside of her. They both cried out at the incredible feeling. He was hard as steel, and the way he felt inside of Amy made her shake.

"God, yes. I'll do anything for you, Mr. Spock," Amy keened, thrusting back against him roughly.

"Anything? Anything at all?" He groaned in her ear, pulling out completely before plunging back in. Amy stiffened in pleasure and grabbed the sheets below her for purchase. Her knee boots were still on, the leather sliding against Sheldon's thighs in the most delicious way. The visual of her naked except for those boots made him even harder.

"Yes, anything…" She moaned, bringing her knees together. Sheldon's vision dimmed as the unbearable friction increased.

"Dear Lord…you feel…" He moaned, pumping into her with abandon.

"Tighter?" She rasped coyly, tilting her pelvis upward. "How about now?" She whispered huskily as Sheldon's manhood hit her g spot. Amy trembled as Sheldon slipped in deeper.

"Amy…dear God…Amy," He moaned helplessly, giving up all pretense of being Spock and her being Nurse Chapel. He pounded into her, his hips flush with hers. Sheldon pulled back to witness his length sliding in and out of her tight passage. It was the most erotic thing he had ever seen. He slid down over her again after a while, reaching underneath with one hand to stroke her womanhood. Amy cried out in passion as he cupped her sex completely, while thrusting into her from behind.

"Oh, yes. Like that. Don't stop. Oh, god…don't stop," She whimpered, her hips shaking violently as his generous length filled her to the brim. He swelled inside of her, this position making her tighter and tighter. The feeling was exquisite.

Sheldon groaned, a war being waged in his heart and his head. He'd never felt so out of control before. It scared him as much as it thrilled him. While he loved the tender and gentle lovemaking they'd shared up until now, he had to admit the depravity and lust he felt seeing his woman so wanton and willing to please him increased his pleasure an hundred fold.

"Like this? Just like this?" He questioned, enraptured by Amy's moans and the way her wetness increased exponentially. He kissed her neck, biting the tender flesh there. He was losing control, fast. His left hand rubbed a swollen nipple roughly between his fingers, and he groaned lustfully when Amy grunted at the pleasurable pain.

"Oh, Sheldon. Harder," She begged, her voice high pitched and frantic. "Fuck me," She whimpered, the expletive bouncing harshly off his walls. His eyes widened at her profane word, but rather than upset him for the out of character remark, it terrified him. Suddenly, he _wanted_ to fuck her. Into oblivion. And Sheldon Cooper had never in his life felt so…animalistic. It scared him. Unnerved him. But excited him, nevertheless.

Amy sensed his hesitation, in the way he whimpered and his thrusts faltered. They were on the edge of something they'd never done before; their lovemaking up until now had been sweet and sensual. Both were pulling each other toward a place of total abandon and hardcore sex. Amy could tell he was frightened, both by what he wanted and by the unknown. She was desperate for this, though. She trusted Sheldon and knew he trusted her, too. No matter what they did, as long as it was together, it would be wonderful. Something told her they both needed this. She tried to put his mind at ease.

"It's alright, Sheldon. It's alright," Amy whispered, her voice sounding deep and husky.

"What-what is?" He stuttered. Sweat dripped from his hair down onto her shoulder blade as he leaned his head against her.

"I know you love me. I _know_ you do. But's okay to just…just want to take me. I'm yours, Sheldon. I belong to you. Take me. _Hard_. Please," She begged.

Sheldon gasped loudly. "How…how hard?" He questioned, already pulling her against him so that her back was flush to his chest. He'd never manhandled his Amy before. But dear god…she was pushing him to the brink of his sanity. If she wanted hard, he'd show her hard.

"As hard as you can give it to me, Mr. Spock. I need you to remind me to whom it is I belong. Mark me. Mark me as yours," She moaned, falling back into character once again.

The war was lost.

Sheldon yanked her upward, impaling her as he growled into her neck. Amy trembled against him, abandoning all shyness as she screamed and moaned as Sheldon plunged into her deeply.

"Oh, god…Amy. Yes." He screamed, his vocal cords tensed as he pounded into her like a madman. He resumed fondling her clitoris, his desire to the breaking point as he felt his hardness sliding against his hand from behind. Amy reached down to hang onto the sheets, crying out in rapture as she came so hard she saw stars. Sheldon relentlessly thrust against her, the utter bliss coursing through his veins like fire. He didn't know who the man inside of him was at the moment, but he hardly cared.

"You are mine. You belong to _me_," He shouted, his teeth breaking the skin on her shoulder, but just barely. The salty, metallic taste of her skin only fueled his passion. The feeling nearly made him black out as he came inside of her, fast and furious.

They rode out their orgasms clinging to each other, falling into a heap on the sodden sheets in a tangle of limbs. Sheldon's breath wheezed in and out of his lungs harshly, while Amy panted quietly. Sheldon felt like a depraved madman. As the euphoria and testosterone flooded his veins a few moments ago, he was oblivious to Amy's whimpering. But now, as their breathing steadied, and the air conditioner the only white noise to be heard, Sheldon heard it.

Crying.

Oh, god...what had he done?

"Amy…Amy…are you alright? Did I hurt you?" He yelled frantically, pulling her against him gently to check her for damage. While the hickey on her shoulder was purple and bruising quickly, it wasn't bleeding. Her hair was a mess, curly tendrils pulled from their updo. She was covered in sweat, her body still shaking.

"Amy. I'm so sorry. I lost control. I hurt you. Oh, Lord. Forgive me," He cried, hating himself for letting go like that. He was shocked and confused when Amy began laughing through her tears.

"Amy…what?" He murmured, searching her face for any explanation. She reached up, stroking his face lovingly.

"Sheldon…that was wonderful. Oh, god. I never imagined," She whispered, breaking off in disbelief to ponder just what she and her boyfriend had just shared.

"I…I didn't hurt you?" He asked fearfully, watching her like a hawk. Amy shook her head rapidly.

"No. Not at all, Sheldon. I never felt so…desired before. Thank you." She cried, sniffling and laughing. It took Sheldon a moment to relax, but once he did, he tentatively smiled at his beautiful girlfriend in awe.

"I don't know what came over me, Amy. I just felt so…possessive. What _was _that?" He asked her slowly.

Amy smiled, thinking about it.

"_That_…was Sheldon and Amy. Trusting each other completely. Letting down their guards and giving each other everything," She purred happily. "I've wanted to share that with you forever," She admitted, tears of joy slipping down her cheeks.

After a quick shower and returning to Sheldon's bed where they changed the sheets, they cuddled in the darkness, each lost in thought.

"Amy?"

"Hmm?" She answered sleepily, cuddling closer to him.

"Amy…when you move in with me I was thinking we could, um…revise the relationship agreement."

His voice sounded hesitant and afraid. Amy sat up a little, her eyes meeting his in the dim light.

"Of course, Sheldon. What would that entail?" She asked cautiously. He shrugged.

"I don't know yet. The thought occurred to me that perhaps we could sit down and rewrite it. Together."

If she hadn't already been lying down, Amy feared she'd pass out.

"What?" She squeaked out, her brain unable to comprehend his words. Sheldon smiled in the darkness.

"Amy…I want our relationship to be on equal footing. When I wrote that agreement, it was with my needs and wants covered, but not yours. I've been thinking about this for a while now," He admitted.

Amy allowed her mind to wander as she considered his words. Rewrite the relationship agreement. Together.

Oh my…

"Amy?"

"Yes?" She questioned quietly, turning her head a fraction to look up at him.

"How opposed are you to not sleeping on a waterbed anymore?" Sheldon asked her.

Amy's breath caught in her throat.

"Are you worried about it springing a leak and ruining Leonard's room? Because I can assure you, it will be fine." She said.

"No, Amy. I'm not worried about that. I wanted…well, I was hoping…that you would share my room. Share my bed." Sheldon whispered.

Amy stared at him, speechless.

"Really? I had just assumed that we would be…roommates. At least, in the beginning," Amy said quietly. Sheldon frowned.

"Roommates? Is that what…you want?" He asked fearfully, and Amy shook her head rapidly.

"Not at all. I just didn't want you to think I expected to share your bed. I know this is a big step."

Sheldon swallowed, his eyes boring into Amy's.

"It _is_ a big step, Amy. But it's one I want to make. Are you sure _you_ do?"

Tears filled Amy's eyes.

"God, Sheldon. Yes. Yes," She assured him, closing her eyes when he pulled her down onto his chest.

"I was hoping we could go bed shopping. Not only do we need a larger bed, but I'd like to pick one out…together."

Amy nodded, overwhelmed. This was really going to happen.

"That sounds…logical." She said happily, her body tingling from head to toe when Sheldon burst out laughing.

"You Vixen. Using my beloved Star Trek quotes against me." He said with mock annoyance. Amy followed suit, laughing until her sides hurt. Her laughter died quickly, however, when Sheldon rolled her on top of him.

"There's something else I'd like you to use against me," He whispered, nipping her breast gently with his lips.

"Oh? And what might that be?" She asked dreamily, running her fingers through his short hair as his tongue laved her nipple. Looking up, he grinned at her like she had never seen him grin before.

"This body," He admitted, kissing her deeply. Hungrily. Thoroughly.

They debated long into the night about the effectiveness of quotes and the decorum of using them.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Amy and Sheldon sat in the auditorium as the graduates filtered up to the stage to collect their diplomas. Sheldon stole a glance at Amy, admiring the way her face was lit up with happiness.

"What are you thinking?" Sheldon whispered as Vivian made her way to the podium. She turned back to the crowd, waving at some people Amy assumed were her family. Their eyes briefly met, and Amy gave Vivian a thumbs up sign. Vivian smiled warmly, waving back to her as she was next to receive her doctorate.

"I'm thinking…that woman up there had a part in saving my life. Without her, I may not be here today."

Sheldon gulped thickly as Amy's words rang all too true, bringing his thoughts back to that horrible day back in late February. Amy was right; without Vivian, Amy might not have lived through that ordeal. If anyone deserved to become a Doctor, it was her.

He nodded slowly, his eyes turning back to the stage to see Vivian accept her diploma, before holding it up for a photo opp.

"Vivian told me that you spoke to her the morning she came to see me. She was very impressed with you, Sheldon." Amy whispered.

Sheldon smiled faintly, a blush blooming on his cheeks.

"Oh…well, I just suggested she do something further with her amazing bedside manner. I had no idea she was already in medical school."

Amy giggled, slipping her hand inside Sheldon's.

"Yep. You called it." She said sweetly, happy when Sheldon not only didn't pull away, but tightened his grip on her hand.

As the ceremony came to a close, the couple made their way out to the foyer with the rest of the guests to meet the graduates. Vivian stopped to hug some people before making her way to where Sheldon and Amy stood.

"Dr. Cooper, Dr. Fowler. Thank you so much for coming today." She said warmly, taking Sheldon's proffered hand gently before giving Amy a slight hug. Amy returned it shyly.

"Congratulations, Dr. Ramirez," She said sassily, offering the woman a toothy grin. Vivian giggled.

"My goodness. I don't know if I'll ever get used to hearing that. It's so surreal," She said honestly, fixing Sheldon with a wink. Sheldon coughed at her flirtatious gesture, but Amy smiled.

"So, how does it feel?" Amy asked.

"Wonderful, actually. It's something I've wanted to do my whole life. To know I can help people…it makes me so very happy," She said, tears springing to her eyes.

Amy's phone rang.

"Excuse me a moment," She apologized, walking to the doorway to answer the call. Vivian smiled, turning her attention to Sheldon who was staring after Amy like a lovesick puppy.

"Wow…the way you look at her is beautiful." Vivian said with awe, cocking her brow when Sheldon turned to stare at her.

"I'm sorry?" He asked in confusion, smiling at her politely.

Vivian smirked.

"I said…the way you look at your girlfriend. It's a beautiful thing to witness. I'm so happy she's still with us," She said seriously. Sheldon nodded.

"Me too. I can't thank you enough for the role you played in keeping her safe. Honestly…I owe you so much for that," Sheldon whispered quietly. The tone of his voice had the smile sliding off of Vivian's face.

"I told you before, Dr. Cooper. You had just as much to do with Amy's saving as we did. I can see how much she means to you. I'm happy for you both that things worked out okay. Sometimes…and I've seen it firsthand, unfortunately, they don't."

Sheldon nodded solemnly, biting his lip.

"No. They don't." He agreed. "But in this case, they did."

Vivian nodded, narrowing her eyes at Sheldon.

"May I ask you a question, Dr. Cooper? And you can tell me I'm out of line if I am, but…do you see yourself and Amy getting married someday?"

The question itself didn't take Sheldon aback. It was the sincere tone of Vivian's voice. He could tell she really liked his girlfriend and wanted the best for her. Saving a person's life does that, he supposed. So he answered her honestly.

"Yes. And not 'just' someday. But _very_ soon." He whispered. Vivian's face broke out in a delighted smile.

"Dr. Cooper, that is just…wonderful. I'm so happy. For both of you."

Sheldon shook his head, not sure what to say.

"Something happened…something, magical. She…changed my life. I never knew what I had until I almost lost it all," He whispered, overcome with emotion. What was it about this woman that made him open up? She'd seen him at his absolute worst; soaking wet, scared to death, angry and helpless. And her compassion never wavered.

"I'm proud of you, Sheldon. I knew when I walked into that bathroom that you were sent to Amy for a reason. She's lucky to have you."

Sheldon gaped at the woman. If only she knew just how the fates had brought them together. But he would never again voice that to another soul, until he voiced it to Amy.

But Vivian was wrong about one thing.

"No, Dr. Ramirez. _I'm_ the lucky one," He said sincerely. Vivian nodded, smiling widely. She sidled up to Sheldon to whisper in his ear.

"Don't you forget it," She sassed, winking at him. Sheldon released an amused but shy laugh.

Amy returned to them, pocketing her phone.

"Sorry about that. It was our friend Rajesh. He's an Astrophysicist who works at Caltech with us. He had some tickets to The Planetarium next week for a Neil Degrasse Tyson debate, and wanted to know if Sheldon and I would like to attend."

Vivian's eyes widened at that.

"Ooh…A Starman. Is he single?" Vivian ventured, her voice playful. Sheldon and Amy looked at each other, before turning back to Vivian and shaking their head in the negative. They both were thinking the same thing – if only they'd met her a year ago, before Raj had met Emily.

"Sorry, no. He's dating a dermatologist," Amy said regretfully, feeling bad when Vivian's face fell. She bounced back quickly, though, smiling at them both.

"Oh, well. I haven't found_ my_ Mr. Right yet. Someday, I hope." She said, motioning to Sheldon. "We can't all snag the golden ticket like you did, Dr. Fowler," She said saucily, winking at Amy. Sheldon blushed.

After another hour of chatting, Sheldon and Amy left the newly appointed Dr. and headed home. Amy and Vivian promised to meet for lunch before Christmas. As they pulled into Amy's parking garage, she looked over at her boyfriend who was watching her with soft eyes.

"Sheldon? What is it?" She asked, smiling sweetly at him. He don't know where it came from, and he didn't care. A feeling of such joy overwhelmed him suddenly, and he just had to tell her.

"I love you, Amy. More than anything. More than Comic Con. More than my spot. More than _trains_. Can you believe that?" He asked incredulously, his voice gentle and awe filled.

Tears filled Amy's eyes. She could believe it, all right.

"I love you too, Sheldon. More than monkey's. More than my harp. More than…Little House on the Prairie."

Sheldon's eyes widened at that, playfully. Wow…she _really_ loved him.

The couple began to laugh, leaning over the console and resting their foreheads against one another.

"Bed shopping next week?" Sheldon whispered, kissing Amy's cheek gently.

"Bed shopping next week," She affirmed, kissing his cheek in return.

They had decided last week that Amy would move in by December 20th. She had persuaded her landlord to let her out of her lease, telling the man that he could keep her security deposit. But after the harried year his poor tenant had almost dying, the landlord couldn't help but take pity on her and agreed to give her back the deposit. He was sure he could rent out her apartment within the month, and she had always been a model tenant.

This year, Christmas would be a very happy one indeed. Amy couldn't wait. And as Sheldon gazed into the eyes of the woman who owned him body and soul, he found he couldn't wait, either. Once his beautiful Amy was settled into his home, and they began their new life together, he would finally take that last step. It was time. Far past time. Living together now was a means to an end. But it wasn't his end _goal_. It wasn't what would make him the happiest man alive. He was ready and prepared for what would.

He thought of the antique ring in his chest of drawers, silently waiting to be put upon the finger of his beloved, where it belonged. Forever.

Sheldon had hated gifts. Giving them, as well as receiving them. But this year, everything would be different. This year, he would give Amy the most important gift of all. And hopefully, with the Fates help, Amy would give him his heart's desire right back. The most precious gift she could.

This Christmas, Sheldon Lee Cooper was going to ask Amy Farrah Fowler to be his wife.

A/N – Thank you for reading. Next chapter, grab your hankies. And brownies. Lots and lots of feels are coming. The good kind. The ones that make you go 'Ahhh'…and…'OMG'…and…well, you know. X


	39. Chapter 39

~Chapter 39~

A/N- A big thank you to everyone who has joined me on this journey. This story is as much for you as it is for Sheldon &amp; Amy. Endings which flow into new beginnings are extremely bittersweet to me. One situation that worked well for so long is now over, but another one that will work even better is just beginning. Life doesn't always go how we planned it. Sometimes, life goes_ better_ than we planned it. This chapter's song lyrics are from SPOV.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended

"…I remember the beginning you already knew, I acted like a fool - just trying to be cool. Fronting like it didn't matter I just ran away- put on another face, was lost in my own space. Found what it's like to hurt selfishly- I was scared to give up me, afraid to just believe. I was in a jealous, insecure, pathetic place- I stumbled through the mess that I had made. I finally got out of my own way, I finally started living for today. I finally know I needed to grow, and finally my mate has met my soul…" Fergie – Finally

The month of November flew by in a haze for Sheldon and Amy.

Sheldon had never before been so successful in solving equations, as paper after paper was uploaded, proven, and published. He would hole up in his office some evenings, late into the night, furiously scribbling away on his whiteboards. The difference now, as opposed to the past, was that he was actually making progress. He was finding tangible proof for his theories, which were being fed into the supercomputer. The calculations matched, most of the work being sent to CERN for confirmation.

Amy would sometimes stop by his office on her way home, knocking quietly and entering when he wouldn't answer. He would be lost in thought, barely sparing her a glance, but she didn't feel slighted. He was making such good headway, and she didn't want to disturb him. More often than not, she'd leave him a bag of takeout on the desk so he wouldn't go without dinner. He would always call her later, sometimes after midnight to thank her and say goodnight.

President Siebert joked at the monthly Physics Dept. meeting that if Sheldon kept going on the path he was, he would have _his_ job someday. And garner that Noble prize he coveted so much. The remark made Leonard smile, his eyes drifting over to Barry Kripke to gauge his reaction. To Leonard's great surprise, Kripke raised his brows and nodded his head in agreement. Leonard hoped the friction between the two Theoretical Physicists was coming to an end.

Sheldon sat at the boardroom table stunned, the out of character comment from the President who spent the better part of Sheldon's career making him miserable filtering around in his mind on a loop. He was finally earning the respect he deserved, and he realized that he deserved that respect, because he _himself_ had shown it. Not being mocked by Siebert anymore was a definite highlight to his day.

His plans had never before included something as lofty as being in charge of one of the most successful Universities in the world. Other than that ambitious try to secure tenure a few years ago, Sheldon hadn't planned on an academic future. Of course then, he hadn't planned on being a Junior Professor either. His success as a Physicist lately was largely due to his success as a Professor.

It was funny how things changed; sometimes quietly, and sometimes with great pomp and circumstance. Although he wasn't thrilled about change per se, Sheldon had to admit the recent changes to his life were welcomed. By adhering to the rules without grumbling, fulfilling his teaching commitments, and allowing Alex to help him when necessary, his transition to Dark Matter from String Theory was going smoothly. His students actually liked him and listened to his teachings, rather than sit bored in his classroom and later mock him behind his back. He felt clearer and focused. Balanced, for the first time in his life.

His professional career was thriving, and he wondered just how much of what that psychic said was true. While before, the old Sheldon would scoff at the prospect, he now only smiled, content with the fact it didn't matter anymore. He didn't believe in hokum, maybe never would. But it was an indisputable fact once he allowed his fears to abate, so many wonderful things had fallen into place.

Both for him, and for Amy.

Leonard stood from his seat, beaming at Sheldon.

"Great job, buddy. Just don't forget whose name _should _be first on that paper we did together," Leonard joked, gathering up his things. Sheldon smirked at him, his eyes following him out of the room.

As he was gathering up his papers to leave, Sheldon noticed Barry Kripke hadn't left his seat yet. He was sitting back in his swivel chair, one leg balanced on the knee of the other, staring at Sheldon silently. It wasn't like Kripke to remain silent for very long, and Sheldon found himself growing uneasy as the last of the staff filtered out, leaving the both of them alone. After a few tense seconds, Sheldon hazarded a glance in his direction. Kripke was smiling at him faintly, and Sheldon didn't know if this was going to evolve into something ugly. Finally, he'd had enough. Slamming his briefcase shut, he fixed Barry with a cold stare.

"Obviously, you have something you want to say. I wait with baited breath to find out what it is. So go ahead. Give me your best, Kripke," Sheldon said resolutely, folding his arms in a defiant manner. The grin slid off of Barry's face, and he narrowed his eyes.

"Cooper…why are you always on the defensive? I just wanted to say congratulations. Your work lately has been stellar. So much better than that mediocre crap you gave me two years ago to work with. I can appreciate talent when I see it. How about we just bury the hatchet?" He said sincerely, standing up and coming over to where Sheldon was standing.

For a moment, Sheldon flinched as he approached him. But when Barry stuck out his hand for Sheldon to shake, he realized he was not playing him for a fool. Taking Barry's hand cautiously, he stared at him in wonder.

"Why? Why now, all of a sudden, do you want to bury the hatchet?" He asked cautiously. Barry merely smiled.

"Listen, Cooper…so much of our history has been your fault." He said quietly.

Sheldon opened his mouth to refute him, but Kripke continued on, determined to have his say.

"Let me say this, Cooper. You were too immature and jealous to even think someone else had any worthwhile ideas. You are the classic example of 'the child that does not work well with others'. You pushed, so I pushed. I'm not like your friends, Cooper. I won't let you get away with that crap. You have to admit, sometimes you asked for it. I may have been rude at times…especially where your personal life was concerned. But I think it's time we resolve our differences. I don't want to be at war with you anymore. You're probably the most highly gifted Physicist I've ever met. That being said, you don't have to lord it over everyone. Just…try to be cool. For the sake of Science," Kripke threw in, making it impossible for Sheldon to argue. He bit his lip, realizing Barry was right.

All of his life, Sheldon knew he stood head and shoulders above most academically. There was no need to point out the obvious. In a way, his behavior was no better than the bullies who taunted him with brawn. He taunted others with brains. Neither one was right. All of a sudden, Sheldon felt ashamed of his actions, even where Kripke was concerned.

"Alright, Barry. For the sake of Science," Sheldon agreed, tightening his grip on Kripke's hand. The two men stared at each other a moment, when suddenly Sheldon grabbed Kripke tighter and brought him closer.

"I apologize for my, shall we say… rude behavior in the past. But there is one thing I will not let slide, Kripke…never, _ever_ disrespect my girlfriend again. Are we clear?" He said calmly, and Kripke nodded seriously.

"Yeah. We're clear." He agreed, admitting defeat. "And I'm sorry as well for being a douchbag sometimes. That's just how guys roll, Cooper. Google it," He said humorously, winking at Sheldon.

Sheldon nodded, relenting that all things considered, Kripke wasn't a bad Physicist after all. His work in the past _was_ better than his own, and even though he didn't have to be best friends with the man, it was prudent that they maintain a good working relationship.

As he turned to leave, Kripke decided better of it and turned back, fixing Sheldon with a kind smile. It was such a foreign gesture on the face of Barry Kripke, that Sheldon's hackles were raised at once.

"Don't take this the wrong way, but…I can see it now." Kripke said, sincerity in his voice. Sheldon pursed his lips, Kripke's words going straight over his head.

"See what now?" Sheldon asked cautiously, raising his defenses. Kripke merely shrugged.

"When you told me…what you told me two years ago, I should have seen you were lying. Because you were still so miserable then. You're not miserable anymore, quite the opposite. You look really happy, Cooper. I should have known you were pulling my leg. Being in love has changed you. For the better," He threw it, smiling to soften the blow.

While Sheldon did not want to talk about his relationship with Amy to Kripke, he understood what Barry was trying to say. It startled him that the self-proclaimed sex god of the Physics Dept. was talking about a woman with respect. Or, more accurately, that woman's impact on Sheldon.

"Thank you," Sheldon said softly, looking away in embarrassment.

"You're welcome. And besides…Dr. Fowler is a good woman. She helped me with that String Theory paper, even knowing it might cause friction between the both of you. She put Science first, and I can respect that. I like her," He said, and Sheldon could tell Kripke would no longer play the cad where Amy was concerned.

"She _is_ a good woman," Sheldon agreed heartily, his voice showing conviction.

Kripke never thought he'd see the day when Sheldon Cooper had it bad for a woman. A _human_ woman. Maybe there was a God. Who knows? He let out an amused chuckle, shaking his head.

"Later, Cooper." He said cordially, sauntering out of the room like he owned it. Sheldon watched him leave, feeling a strange sense of calm wash over him.

He wondered if Amy would be proud of him for apologizing to Kripke. And he wondered if Kripke's words were true. _Did_ he act happier these days? He supposed he must, if people were willing to be in his presence without wanting to kill him.

And for that, he owed the credit entirely to one person.

Amy.

Kripke was right – being in love _had _changed him. His priorities and dreams had shifted now, all to include a future with Amy. All to become worthy of her; of having her in his life.

Amy would be moving in soon. They would be living together. Sleeping in the same bed. Waking up in the same bed. Sharing their space. Sharing their lives. As the calendar counted down the days, Sheldon found not his anxiety mounting, but his excitement. He couldn't wait to begin this new chapter with her. For once in a great while, Sheldon didn't fear the future. He welcomed it, with open arms.

Picking up his briefcase, Sheldon left the room with his mind full and his heart even fuller.

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By the time Thanksgiving week rolled around, Amy had already boxed up a fair bit of her possessions and had made arrangements to put her furniture in storage after she left. She didn't want to get rid of it yet, just in case someone needed it later on. Also, the items could be sold and the money could be used for something useful.

It saddened her the day she called the landlord to make an appointment to drain her waterbed. Even though she was thrilled to finally be starting a new life with Sheldon, she had to admit she would miss her independence, her space, and her things. She supposed it was normal, after being on her own so long, to have these misgivings. Nothing on Earth could make her change her mind now, though. She was more and more eager as the days went by to call Los Robles her home.

As promised, she and Sheldon had gone bed shopping and settled upon a lovely queen sized pillow top. It was decadently wonderful; plush with just the right amount of firmness. They both knew when they tested it out in the showroom that it was the winner.

Sheldon couldn't believe he never before pondered having such a luxurious bed. Not only was it wider, plusher, and more comfortable…it was _longer_. His feet didn't hang over the side, a fact which had Amy breaking out in hysterical laughter when he incredulously voiced that fact.

He wondered what other luxuries he had been missing out on all of these years, speaking out loud. Amy answered him with a wink, making his mouth go dry.

"Hmm…a fair few. Someday when you least expect it, I'll show you," She drawled, thrilled when Sheldon stumbled over his own feet as they walked to the register to pay.

They both decided to have the bed delivered the day she would officially move in, December 20th. Sheldon had stated that he didn't want to spend a night without her in _their_ new bed until she was by his side to share it. The gesture deeply touched Amy, and she threw her arms around his neck to draw him in for a passionate kiss right there in the middle of the Dept. Store. Onlookers and sales staff be damned.

Later that night, she lay alone in her bed staring at the ceiling. Her thoughts wandered back to that early morning late last February, when she was awakened by a nightmare of Sheldon leaving her again. Her mind pieced together the memory; arriving at Los Robles to find Sheldon gone. She could now trace back the events leading to her illness – jealously over Sheldon and Penny's friendship, constant dreams about Sheldon abandoning her, running herself ragged at work and not resting enough. It was all a recipe for disaster. It was no wonder she fell ill; her immunity had been stretched to the limit.

So much had changed since that fateful day. So many things had been brought to light. She had a reason to fight, now. Sheldon Cooper was in love with her. And she knew she loved him more than anything. This was the right decision they were making, moving in together. Even though it was her fantasy two years ago, they were not ready then. The events that led to this moment _had_ to happen, for them both to appreciate and understand their bond. She knew that now, and she believed Sheldon knew it, as well.

"I'm not afraid anymore. I'm no longer the homely, frail girl I was back at Harvard. I'm a winner now. I've made it." She said out loud, happiness and strength in her voice.

Finally, finally…Amy Farrah Fowler was going to have her happily ever after.

Falling into a dreamless sleep, she couldn't see the little girl across time and space that sat under a large tree, its limbs stretching as far as the heavens. She plucked a few fallen leaves off the ground, throwing them up and around her in a happy cloud. She laughed, letting out a sigh of relief. And she smiled.

_Yes, Amy. You made it. Good for you. Good for US._ XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"So, Howie and I were thinking of having Thanksgiving at his mother's house this year. Is everyone up for joining us there?" Bernadette asked, taking a bite of her pizza and looking around the room in question.

"Yeah, Jewish turkey with matzoh balls. I drew the line at gefilte fish, though." Howard interjected dryly, earning a chuckle out of Leonard.

Raj nodded enthusiastically.

"Sure. Emily and I are up for it. She already said whatever I want to do is fine with her, since she doesn't like to cook." Raj said casually, reaching inside the pizza box for another slice.

Bernadette looked over to Leonard and Penny, who both nodded in her direction.

"Works for us. Let us know what we can bring," Penny said, taking a swig of her beer. Bernadette nodded, looking over to Amy and Sheldon for confirmation. To her surprise, Sheldon shook his head in the negative. Amy stared at him with confusion.

"I'm afraid Amy and I won't be able to attend, Bernadette. Just today I was contacted by Amy's mother, who invited us to her home for Thanksgiving dinner. We haven't discussed it yet, but I'm sure Amy would like me to escort her home for Thanksgiving, seeing how I've missed the last five years of holidays with them."

Sheldon looked at Amy for confirmation, noticing how her eyes widened.

"Um…my mother called you instead of me? That's peculiar," Amy stated, putting her plate down on her lap. Sheldon shrugged, doing the same thing.

"Perhaps. But I think it was her way of trying to let me know I was welcomed, after all these years of declining their invitation. I was going to ask you later, when we were alone. But do you want to go? I would be happy to go this time," He said sincerely, making Amy's face break out in a delighted smile.

"Really? You don't mind spending the better part of six hours with my family?" She challenged, smiling softly when Sheldon shook his head in the negative.

"No. Not at all. I owe you, Dr. Fowler." He said gently, taking her hand. The entire room went silent as they watched the tender exchange. "Just please don't tell me your tart of a cousin will be there. I don't think I could bear to sit at a dinner table with that woman. I would have to get drunk again, and I don't want a repeat performance like at the Wolowitz's again." He said, shuddering.

Amy chuckled, squeezing Sheldon's hand in return.

"I doubt they'll be there. Cassidy's idea of a holiday meal consists of a slim fast shake and a phentermine tablet," She laughed, Sheldon taking a moment before he caught on to the joke. He guffawed loudly, throwing his arms around her back tenderly. He whispered something in her ear that no one could hear, but Penny could swear she heard the words _shapely_ and _posterior_. She rolled her eyes playfully, smirking at Leonard who was discreetly looking the other way.

"Good God…would you look at them? Who _are_ these people?" Howard whispered to Raj, who was already tearing up.

"Dude. It's beautiful. _We_ are to thank for this, you know. If not for us, Sheldon and Amy would never have met." Raj stated confidently, bumping fists with Howard and smiling smugly. Howard nodded, raising his brow as he considered the validity of Raj's statement.

"Yeah. Sheldon sort of owes us," Howard quipped, shoving his pizza into his mouth.

Sheldon's Vulcan like hearing caught the exchange, but he didn't draw attention to the fact he heard their words. He smiled faintly, knowing forces much greater than the likes of Raj and Howard were responsible for their clandestine meeting. He had a bottle hidden away safely in his room that was proof of that.

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_One Month Later..._

Sheldon sat alone on the bed in the last bedroom down the hall, looking around at the empty walls.

No more posters. No more comic books. No more figurines adorning the dresser and nightstand, and no more lightsaber standing up in the corner. The only thing that confirmed Leonard lived in this room for ten years, was the faint scent of his cologne that wafted through the air.

Sheldon's eyes landed on the wall to his right. Tears filled his eyes unbidden as he scooted closer to the wall, raising his hand gently and knocking out a message in Morse code.

"Leonard"

"Leonard"

"Leonard"

He said softly, laughing after a second even as the tears began to roll down his face.

Ten years. The blip of an eye in the space time continuum. But a lifetime of friendship, joy, security, laughter, and fellowship for Sheldon Cooper.

He knew this was the natural order of things; the chain of events setting forward was necessary for both him and for Leonard. They had grown up. Become men. And they were now embarking on lives no longer intermingled, but parallel.

It wasn't like they were never going to see each other again. For one thing, they would still be living no more than fifty feet away from each other. At least, for the foreseeable future. And for another, they still worked together at Caltech. They would still see each other every day, eat lunch together most days, and Leonard had stated that even though Amy worked on the same campus as them, he would be more than happy to give Sheldon a ride to work every morning. They would have their private time in the car to chat and catch up.

Nothing had to change, other than the fact his little buddy would no longer be on the other side of his wall at night.

He thought of everything Leonard meant to him. A brother – someone whom he trusted implicitly. A friend – a man who would defend him against any foe. An ally – a person who would always have his back and put him on the right path. What the hell would he have done without Leonard? How would he have navigated the minefield of social convention? Of University politics? And of course…the dangerous battlefield of falling in love?

Sheldon laughed, rubbing away the tears in his eyes and on his cheeks. It wasn't like him to be so…emotional. But this year had changed him, molded him. He used to think he was better off not feeling. Not having emotional ties to those he cared for. But, like most humans, he realized the bittersweet benefits of experiencing those emotions. They hurt, but in a good way. It proved he was loved. And, moreover…it proved he was _able_ to love. That, more than anything, bespoke of progress.

A gentle knock sounded out, startling Sheldon. He quickly wiped his nose, uncharacteristically wiping his hand on his shirt.

"Come," He said, his normally strong voice sounding dull.

The door opened slowly, and for a second Sheldon thought it would be Amy.

"Sheldon? What are you doing in here?" Leonard asked gently, popping his head in his now former doorway. Their eyes met across the small expanse, and Sheldon couldn't hide his sorrow. Neither could Leonard. As it often happened when one of them cried, the other wasn't far behind. Tears trekked down Leonard's face, and he came to sit beside his friend on his former bed.

"Buddy," Leonard tried, his voice cracking and already tear clogged. "I know…I know it's hard. I feel it too. But we're just across the hall from each other. Not across the Universe," Leonard pointed out, chuckling at his own quip. Sheldon nodded, although his tears began anew.

"I know that, Leonard. I know." He said softly, turning sideways to meet his best friend's compassionate gaze. "It's just…my brother and I…we were never close. For obvious reasons. And my father, well…you know. My Pop-Pop died when I was very young, so…I guess, I've never had a positive male influence in my life. Until you," Sheldon admitted, smiling sadly.

Leonard's face contorted with understanding, and he nodded his head rapidly.

"I feel the same way, Sheldon. My Father, my brother…not strong role models. And not people who ever gave me the time of day. I never told you this, but…the day I knocked on your door? Answering your ad? It was the day I finally found a real brother. You're my family, Sheldon. And you always will be." Leonard sobbed, not caring how juvenile or effeminate he looked. This man had driven him crazy for the better part of ten years with rules, regulations, demands, agreements, and forms.

Leonard didn't know how he was ever going to go on without him. As hard as it was, in the end, they were family.

Sheldon stared at his friend for endless moments, Professor Proton's words running through him like a river.

_Appreciate them…_

And he did. Finally.

"I love you, Leonard. You're my family, too. And I want to thank you for all you've done for me. Listening to me. Supporting me. Understanding me. Even when nobody else did. I know I've been difficult. So what you did means so much more than you know. The day you showed up here? I found a brother too."

Leonard coughed, his tears choking him.

"Buddy," He managed, patting Sheldon on the back and leaning his head on Sheldon's shoulder. Now, unlike the day Leonard told him Arthur died, Sheldon welcomed the weight of Leonard's head on his shoulder. Sheldon lowered his head, resting his head against Leonard's. Although he knew that this discussion was necessary, it still hurt like hell. His world was changing. And he hated change. But the fruit this change would bear was sweeter than anything he could imagine.

Beginning a new life, with Amy. Embarking on a future filled with love, romance, children…and, hopefully, continued professional success.

The two friends remained silent a moment longer, absorbing the brotherly love and the memories they both shared. Leonard leaned over to the bedside table, taking a tissue and offering one to Sheldon.

"Look at us. If Penny and Amy could see us now," Leonard chuckled, blowing his nose. Sheldon chuckled in reply, blowing his own nose.

"They'd say, 'what a pair of nerds.' Sheldon said in a deadpan voice.

The guys looked at each other, both breaking out in raucous laughter. Not another word needed to be said. They both knew, they would have the other's back forever. Leonard stood, shuffling his feet.

"So…I'm not saying goodbye. I'm right next door. And I'll be over tonight for dinner and video games. This isn't the end, Sheldon. Okay?" He asked cautiously. Sheldon nodded, offering his friend a cheerful smile.

"Not the end." Sheldon echoed, smiling faintly in his Leonard's direction. He thanked the stars for his little homunculus.

Leonard turned to leave, but Sheldon stopped him.

"Leonard? Before you go…there's something I want to share with you."

Leonard nodded, coming back and sitting down.

"Sure, buddy. What is it?"

Sheldon bit his lip, trying to string his words together.

"When I went back to Texas a couple of months ago, Meemaw gave me something. To give to Amy. I was planning on giving it to her on Christmas. But I'm at a loss as to how. It is very important to me, and it has to be…perfect." He said, tentatively looking at Leonard and hoping he could figure it out. When Leonard's eyes widened, Sheldon was confident that he did.

"Are you…it's…Wow." Leonard whispered, happy tears beginning anew in Leonard's eyes. "Wow, Sheldon. Are you sure?" He asked kindly, knowing full well that Sheldon was more than sure.

Sheldon nodded, wiping his eyes.

"Yes, Leonard. I've never been so sure. That's what I'm afraid of. Messing it up. This is the first and last time I will ask those words. I want them to be perfect for her. For _me_." Sheldon stated passionately, and the strength in his voice touched Leonard greatly.

His friend was in love. And he was asking his love for her hand in marriage. He was so proud of Sheldon in that moment, he was certain that even being a father, he could be no less proud.

"Do you have any idea what to say, or how to go about it?" He questioned kindly, his worst fears confirmed when Sheldon shook his head no.

"Nothing. And I've thought of it endlessly for the last month. I ran through the usual things; taking her to the roof, because our prom was there. Taking her back to the coffee shop where we first met. Nothing seems good enough, though. I'm at a loss," He admitted, chewing his lip. His large blue eyes met his friend's, and Leonard smiled.

Putting his arm around Sheldon's shoulders, he hatched a quick plan. It was late in the day, and space may not be available, but it was worth a shot.

"Sheldon…I have an idea."

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The next evening, as planned, Amy brought the last of her boxes to 2311 Los Robles Avenue. It would be her first official night in her new home. Her new room. Her new bed.

When she stepped over the threshold after work, Sheldon opening the door for her after she knocked, something shifted forever. He grabbed her hand, pulling her inside and kissed her passionately. She dropped the little suitcase and box she held, thankful nothing inside was breakable. But the way Sheldon was biting her lip and using his tongue to soothe it, made her quickly forget whatever it was she was carrying.

"This is your door now, Amy. Don't ever knock on it again," He whispered in her ear, kissing the sensitive flesh lovingly. Happy tears sprang to Amy's eyes, and shivers flew up and down her spine.

_Her door. _

"Okay," She agreed, whispering just as reverently as Sheldon did. The reality of her new life hit her like a ton of feathers. This was _her_ home now.

She didn't have to trick Sheldon into letting her move in. She wasn't his last resort, or a hasty decision he made to keep her in his life. She and Sheldon weren't just boyfriend/girlfriend anymore. They weren't even simply roommates. They were lover's, sharing their home. Sharing their bed. Sharing their lives.

Amy didn't want to cry, at least not now. She was happier than she ever imagined she could be. There would be time later to reflect and yes, become emotional. Right now, though…she wanted to savor this moment. Enjoy it. Her first night spent with the man she loved.

"After Leonard left yesterday, I put the rest of your things in his old room. Books, music…your harp as well. Whatever you'd rather have in…our room…feel free to take back over," Sheldon said gently. Amy smiled softly at him, nodding her head.

"Thank you, Sheldon. For now…everything is fine where it is."

They walked in the bedroom together, and Amy noticed at once the change. Other than the larger queen sized bed that filled the room, Sheldon had removed the majority of his comic books and trains. Amy turned to him, stunned.

"Where are your things?" She asked softly, cocking her head when Sheldon turned towards the door.

"In Leonard's old room. I didn't want to make you feel like you were moving into _my_ room, Amy. I want you to feel like you're moving into _our_ room."

Amy gasped at Sheldon's words, disbelief flowing through her. He was trying so hard to accommodate her, make her feel welcomed.

"Oh, Sheldon. You didn't have to move your possessions. I didn't mind them, really." She affirmed, but Sheldon shook his head in the negative.

"_I_ minded, Amy. They're just right next door, next to your things. They still have a home here. They just aren't the focal point of this room anymore. Maybe…we can buy things we both like, together. And fill this room with those things. What do you think?" He asked cautiously.

Amy's smile was near blinding as she gazed at Sheldon.

"What do I think?" She pondered, throwing her arms around her boyfriend's neck. "I think…I love you."

Sheldon smiled shyly at his girlfriend, relieved in the knowledge he had made her so happy.

It was Monday, and in keeping with tradition, the gang came over and they all sat around the couch eating Thai. Sheldon in his spot, Amy beside him in hers. Leonard in his white chair.

Nothing had changed. Everything had changed. And they all had never been happier.

The guys decided to pop in a movie, so Penny and Bernadette joined Amy in the kitchen to help clear up from dinner. They met around the island, and Penny smiled as she watched Amy fill the sink with soap.

"Your first night here and you're already cleaning. You should sit down, relax. Let Sheldon do this," Penny smirked, laughing when Bernadette giggled. Amy joined in.

"It's okay. Actually, I need the distraction. I can't believe I actually…_live_ here now." Amy said in incredulity.

The sound of awe in Amy's voice make Penny's heart stutter.

"Yeah, you do. I have to hand it to you, Amy Farrah Fowler. You have done what no woman could ever do. You made Sheldon Cooper fall in love. Wow," Penny echoed, her mind racing back to the early days of Sheldon and Amy's courtship. While strange, calculated, and unorthodox…she could see, even then, the telltale signs that Shamy would go the distance.

The gang left shortly after ten, leaving the couple to their now shared apartment. As Sheldon turned the lock, his eyes strayed to Amy who was in the kitchen preparing a cup of tea for the both of them. As he approached her, and she caught the look in his eyes, she dropped the kettle on the counter and stood as still as a statue.

"Our first night alone in our new bed," Sheldon whispered, coming to stand beside his girlfriend and taking her hands gently. Amy gulped, nodding her head slowly. She had no reason on Earth to feel nervous. And yet, she couldn't help but notice the school of butterflies that had been let loose in her stomach.

"Yes. Did you wash the new sheets we bought?" Amy asked, not surprised when Sheldon nodded faintly.

"Of course. Last week. I'm always prepared," He said truthfully, giving her the boy scout salute. Amy smiled softly.

"Always prepared," She echoed, her heartbeat quickening as Sheldon drew patterns on her hands with his fingers. His breath quickened as Amy reached up, touching his cheek gently.

"Forget the tea," He whispered, pulling Amy close and lowering his mouth to her neck. The exquisite pleasure of his lips moving over her skin was always enough to render her mute. But tonight, she knew something was different. The slow, precise moves of his actions had Amy panting within moments.

"Sheldon-"

"The first time we made love in my bed, I had told you I wanted my sheets to smell like you. Now, it's _our_ bed. And I want _our_ sheets smell like you, Amy." He whispered lovingly, his lips capturing her mouth in a passionate kiss which left her head spinning. Amy managed to nod, and that was all the encouragement Sheldon needed.

They turned out the lights, making their way together to their room. They undressed each other slowly, Sheldon turning the new duvet down and allowing Amy to get in. She looked around the room, wondering if she should put something on, but Sheldon shook his head.

"I want to hold you tonight. Skin to skin. Is that alright?" He asked her tenderly, his heart somersaulting when Amy smiled a beautiful smile that lit up her entire face.

"More than alright," She whispered, sliding against her boyfriend on the cool sheets. The bed was amazing, cradling them both in luxury and comfort.

"Wow…I don't know what feels better. Your silky skin, or this bed," Sheldon joked, letting out a piercing cry when Amy smacked his behind gently.

"Hey…what was that for?" He asked, trying and failing to contain his laughter. Amy smirked at her man, not letting him off the hook.

"Just you wait, Dr. Cooper. I'm going to give you things in this bed that you've only dreamt of," She promised slyly, earning a wide eyed glance and a gulp from her pedantic boyfriend.

"Oh, really. Such as?" He ventured.

Leaning over, Amy rubbed her naked body against his. Sheldon shuddered from head to toe.

"How does…breakfast in bed consisting of chocolate chip pancakes and bacon sound?" She said sensuously, biting his lip before he could even blink. When she pulled back, laughter wracking her body, Sheldon gasped. That little vixen.

Pulling her close, he covered her body with his own, amazed at how quickly she ignited his passion. They stared at each other in the darkness, Amy's body softening at the way Sheldon sank into her.

"Well…holding each other is nice. But I can think of other ways to christen this bed," She whispered, earning a groan out of her Physicist.

"Many, _many_ ways," Sheldon agreed, his lips meeting hers.

Suddenly, breakfast in bed was the last thing on their minds.

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It was late when Penny and Leonard stumbled back to 4B- an hour after Bernadette, Howard, Raj, and Emily left Sheldon and Amy's.

Amy sat in her spot on the couch, legs tucked up underneath her demurely as she sipped a glass of egg nog. She and Sheldon had made dinner for the group, though nothing as fancy as last year's Victorian endeavor. Tomorrow was Christmas day, and Amy was looking forward to sleeping in.

Sheldon stood on the landing, watching her. He hoped with every fiber of his being that he was making the right decision, following Leonard's advice. He had told Leonard this had to be perfect, that he would never again get another first chance to propose. He nervously walked up to the couch, stopping short of her and smiled at her gently. Amy didn't notice him at first, as her gaze was fixed to the lights of the Christmas tree. But when she turned and found him watching her, her face lit up to rival the tree behind them.

"Hey, you. Sit with me and enjoy the Christmas lights," She said sweetly, scooting over further to allow him greater comfort. He stared at her with soft eyes, this incredible creature that owned his heart.

"Alright," He whispered, settling in beside her and taking her in his arms. Amy fell back on his chest with little encouragement, and together they lay in the dim room, the only illumination coming from the tree.

"Did you enjoy the day, Sheldon? I know you're not much of a Christmas fan, but it wasn't too tedious, was it?" She asked him kindly, turning her head sideways and catching his eye. Sheldon smiled.

"No. It wasn't too tedious. And the fact you have become an expert in making Meemaw's Christmas cookies doesn't hurt, either," He smirked, tightening his grip on her arms. Amy giggled warmly.

"Well…I'm just grateful that Meemaw decided to share her recipe with me," She said truthfully, happy to have been included in the means to make her grandson so content.

Sheldon took a deep breath.

"That's not all she decided to share with you, Amy." Sheldon whispered, his face buried in Amy's hair.

"I'm sorry, what?" Amy questioned, but Sheldon shook his head.

"Nothing. I have a surprise for you. I wanted to give it to you all day, but we were never alone. Here," Sheldon said softly, handing Amy an envelope which he pulled out from his pocket. She eyed him wearily, putting her egg nog glass on the table.

"What's this?" She asked him, her gaze falling upon the envelope. Sheldon stared at her a moment, trying to calm his breathing.

'_You can do this. You can do this,'_ He chanted to himself.

"I know we agreed on no presents, but this is something for both of us to enjoy." He said, watching Amy closely.

Amy scrunched up her nose, before her mouth broke out in a grin.

"What have you done?" She asked sweetly. Amy opened the seal, revealing two tickets for the Napa Valley Wine Train dated for tomorrow - Christmas Day, with a sleepover at the bed and breakfast they had stayed at last year.

"I…I don't understand," She said blankly, staring at the tickets in confusion. Although it was a train, she had no idea why Sheldon would want to revisit something she assumed he hadn't enjoyed.

Sheldon took her hands in his own. He faltered a moment as he tried to find the right words.

"This trip, Amy…is a do-over. The last time we took this train, a trip that you were so excited about…I ruined it. I acted selfishly, I was dismissive, and I was rude. I want to take that memory, and change it into a beautiful one for you. Please, Amy. Let me do this," He implored, his blue eyes piercing hers.

Amy was stunned, her head awhirl. Afraid to even believe that Sheldon wanted to give her something so lovely, she could only nod.

"O-Okay. That sounds…wonderful. But, I have to pack. There are so many things-"

Sheldon cut Amy off with a flick of his wrist.

"Nothing to worry about. I took the liberty this morning of packing a bag for you. Don't worry; I included outfits I knew you would approve of, and be comfortable in. I want…I want to take care of you, on this trip. I want to give you everything you should have gotten the first time." He whispered with emotion.

Amy opened and closed her mouth a few times, happily surprised. Over the last few months, he had treated her like a queen. She had never felt so doted upon, so loved. She had no idea why this meant so much to Sheldon, but she wouldn't fight him on it. Leaning in, she kissed his neck softly, smiling when she felt him swallow.

"And just what is it you think I didn't get the first time?" She whispered, stunned when he pulled her chin back to gaze into her eyes.

Romance," He stated, his voice deep and sure.

It was Amy's turn to gulp now, as Sheldon's eyes burned a path from her eyes to her mouth.

"Um…I seem to recall a _great_ deal of romance going on that weekend," She whispered, the thumping of her heartbeat increasing as she watched Sheldon's eyes darken. He leaned in closer, running his lips across her throat.

"Perhaps…but this time, it won't be because I feel cornered or trapped into it. I want to this this, Amy. For you, and for myself."

The conviction in his voice make Amy's knees weak.

"Alright," She agreed, more than happy to have Sheldon all to herself for Christmas.

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The Napa Valley Wine Train was full, Sheldon lucky to have secured two tickets at such short notice. Leonard's suggestion was perfect. He would indeed make up for the fiasco of the last train trip, by giving Amy the best possible memory he could.

After the couple settled in, they were entertained in the dining car by a string quartet. The short concert included mostly Christmas songs, but there were a few classical numbers as well. The beautiful music only added to the enjoyment of the night, as they whisked through the California countryside under a blanket of stars. Sheldon looked around at the other revelers, wondering how it was he ever thought this was meaningless. To be here, tonight, with the woman he held most dear…it was the greatest gift he could receive. Be it Christmas, or any other time.

They dined on roast beef and mashed potatoes, Sheldon even partaking of a glass of Pinot Noir. Although he wanted to have a clear mind for what was to come, he desperately needed the courage. They held hands and laughed, and when Sheldon ordered a brownie tart for dessert, Amy's heart nearly burst through her ribcage.

"I'm having a wonderful time, Sheldon. Thank you so much for this beautiful gift. But trust me…that last trip we took on this train, it ended up pretty spectacular." She said, her voice playful.

Sheldon blushed, averting his eyes to the table and spearing the last bite of brownie on his fork. He held it out for Amy to take, his eyes lingering on her mouth as he slid the fork between her lips.

"It did, didn't it?" He asked quietly, smiling at the happy turn of events that fateful night. He couldn't believe it was almost two years ago.

"It did," She affirmed, licking her lips free of the chocolate which clung there. Sheldon nearly lost his breath. Never before had he wished to be a chocolate crumb so badly.

"Would you like to go to the car with the glass roof and watch the stars?" He asked softly, giving himself a mental high five when Amy gazed at him with sparkling eyes.

"Really?" She asked, further entranced when Sheldon nodded and took her hand to lead her the three cars back to the place in question. Amy followed behind him, her gaze fixed to his back as he strode through each compartment effortlessly.

There was only a handful of travelers there, as the hour was late. Most travelers had opted to stay in the dining car to listen to more music, or exchange gifts with loved ones. Sheldon secured them a spot away from the others, the glass roof above them affording them a magnificent view of the night sky.

"Oh, Sheldon. This is just beautiful," Amy gushed, sitting down and shivering in pleasure when Sheldon placed an arm around her shoulder.

A thought occurred to him then, and he turned toward his girlfriend with remorse in his eyes.

"Amy?"

"Hmm?" She answered absently, turning her head to meet his gaze.

"I'm sorry, that the first time we were here, I didn't even think of doing this for you. I was so caught up in my own wants, that I didn't take the time to care about yours. Especially after you thought of that trip as a way to make me happy. I was so selfish," He said, regret in his voice. Amy turned further into his embrace, reaching up to cradle his jaw. Sheldon leaned into her touch.

"Sheldon…I understand. I do. You weren't ready then. I too could have been more understanding. I basically tricked you into a romantic weekend that you couldn't handle. It's a wonder you didn't kick me to the curb the moment we got back to Pasadena," She chuckled, and the joke at her expense disturbed Sheldon.

"No…Amy. It was _you_ that should have kicked _me_ to the curb. How you had such patience with me, I'll never know. I used taunting you and belittling you as a means to deliver my first kiss to you. I wish I could erase that whole entire evening," He lamented sadly.

But Amy never wanted to do that. For what it was worth, that was the first time during their whole relationship that Sheldon took what he wanted from her, without second guessing himself. Though Sheldon thought otherwise, it was a moment in time that she would forever treasure. The way he kissed her, moving in and taking hold of her hip gently…it was a memory she never wanted to forget.

"Tell me something?" Amy asked gently, rubbing Sheldon's fingers. His eyes dipped to their hands a moment before settling back on hers.

"Anything," He promised eagerly.

"That night, on the train? Did you really want to kiss me, or were you just making a point?"

Sheldon smiled faintly, his mind conjuring up how she felt that night, how she smelled so sweet. The softness of her lips, the delicacy of her voice. Oh, he wanted to kiss her alright. And he treated her like garbage because of it. He let his fear and his audacity make him behave like a monster.

"A bit of both, I admit. I _did_ want to kiss you, Amy. But I was so scared. I didn't know how to approach it. I think…meeting Eric was the perfect excuse. Even though I liked him, and found his company interesting…it gave me an out. I'm so sorry for my behavior. You were right. You deserve romance. I was so clueless, I didn't know how to give it to you."

His sincerity touched her deeply, and Amy found herself tearing up. For a split second that night in question, she hadn't known what was happening. The cold, fleeting thought that they were headed for a breakup was very real. Then suddenly, his lips were covering hers, culminating in all of her dreams and desires.

"Don't worry, Sheldon. You gave it to me, just right," Amy assured him, her voice tender. Sheldon stared at her in awe, marveling at the wonder that was this heavenly creature.

His entire body broke up in a cold sweat, his mind going totally blank. It was as though time was standing still, waiting for him to catch up.

Now. The moment was _now_. He knew it. Every fiber and cell in his body was ready.

"Amy…there's something else that I want to give you, just right," He whispered, pulling something out of his pocket and gripping it tightly in his palm. It was hard to decipher what it was in the near darkness, and Amy narrowed her eyes, staring at the box curiously.

"Oh, Sheldon…You said that you didn't get me anything," She stated in confusion. Sheldon smiled warmly.

"No, Amy…I said, I didn't _buy _you anything. There is a difference," He whispered, sliding closer to her in anticipation. Amy stared at first Sheldon, and then the box.

"Please. Open it," He implored, his blue eyes crisp and clear.

Her hands trembled as she pulled the gift out of its outer box, revealing a smaller blue box.

"Oh…" She gasped, staring at the robin's egg blue square. Her eyes were glued to the box, her entire world pinpointing to this moment. When she looked up, slowly, and met Sheldon's gaze…a whimper escaped her. The color of this box and what it represented was Universal knowledge.

Sheldon was watching her with tender eyes; eyes that didn't want to miss a second of what she was experiencing. Years later, he would remember this moment, and relive it as though it were happening all over again. And he _would_ relive it, gladly, because it was one of the moments that meant more to him than any other ever would.

He watched as Amy's tears began to pool in her verdant orbs. He watched as her full bottom lip began to tremble. He watched as her fingers shook as they ran over the fabric of the box. And he waited, patiently, for the right second. Taking the box from her hands, he held it between them, and opened the hinge.

Amy's eyes fell shut as the tears rolled down her face.

"Oh, God." She exclaimed, her breath leaving her lungs in a whoosh.

The ring was exquisite. Sapphires and diamonds set upon a thick platinum band of gold. The color instantly reminded Amy of Sheldon's eyes, when his mood was passionate. A harsh sob forced its way from her mouth, as she bit her lip hard.

"Sheldon," She whimpered, feeling she was surely going to die from happiness. This couldn't be happening. It just couldn't be happening. Beautiful things such as this didn't happen to Amy Farrah Fowler.

But as Sheldon slipped from his seat, stealthily sliding to the ground on his knees in front of her, Amy knew that everything she had ever experienced- good or bad- had led her to this moment. It was all worth it. Every little bit of it.

Worth it.

Sheldon took her hand, his fingers running over the soft skin like they were gossamer.

"Hello, Amy Farrah Fowler," He whispered to her, using the exact first words he ever spoke to her. His tone of voice now, as then, was polite and sweet. But tinged with so much more.

"Hello, Sheldon Cooper." She echoed, her voice catching. "What are you doing?" She asked him needlessly, smiling as he chuckled quietly.

"Claiming you, Amy…for my own. Five years ago…I was tricked into meeting you at a coffee shop. Two of my closest friends threatened me with hiding a dirty sock in my apartment if I didn't come and meet you. Can you believe the nerve of them?" Sheldon asked jovially, tears forming in his own eyes as he watched Amy smile through her tears.

"The nerve of some people," She agreed, her eyes never leaving his. "But as I share your aversion to soiled hosiery, I understand why you decided to come." She whispered, and Sheldon nodded.

"I can't…tell you how glad I am that I came," Sheldon whispered, squeezing her hand tightly. He took the ring from its place setting, marveling at the weight of it. Both literally and figuratively.

"This ring…this ring was Meemaw's ring, Amy. Given to her by Pop-Pop on the day he asked her to be his wife." Sheldon said, his voice trembling. Amy's mouth fell open as she stared down at the most perfect piece of jewelry ever to grace the Earth. Sheldon was giving her this most precious of gems. It was nearly too much to take in.

"I wish you had known my Pop-Pop, Amy. He would have loved you. He probably would have called you sugar. He called all of the pretty girl's sugar. If you accept this ring…the both of you will be bonded for eternity. Just like you and Meemaw. Just like you and me."

Amy sobbed, her breath harsh as it made its way through her mouth. Sheldon took a deep breath, knowing that in this moment, his words didn't have to be perfect. They only had to be sincere and truthful.

So Sheldon threw away his pride, and bared his soul for woman he would move Heaven and Hell for.

"I'm a flawed man, Amy. I know you must be shocked to hear those words coming out of my mouth. But I am. I am an obsessive compulsive. I have a god complex. I'm fussy. Impossible. Structured and ridged most of the time. I'm clueless. I can be selfish. Self-absorbed, myopic, and thoughtless. How you fell in love with me…how you even gave me the time of day…is a beautiful mystery to me. You, in turn…are beautiful. Brilliant. Funny. Warm. And…perfect. At least, perfect for me. You surpass me in so many ways. You compliment me. You complete me. And no matter how high my IQ is, or how many equations I solve…nothing in my life will ever be worth it if you aren't by my side to share it. The last time we took this ride together, I completely got it wrong. Help me, Amy. Allow me to make things right. Please allow me to replace such a sad memory, with a happier one. Help me give you what you deserve. What you've _always_ deserved. Romance. Love. And honor. For the rest of your life. I almost lost you this year. Not once, but twice. I swear to you, Amy Farrah Fowler…I will never risk losing you again." He said roughly.

Amy's tears fell faster and faster as she stared at this man who had stolen her heart. She didn't think she would survive the joy coursing through her veins.

"Oh, God… Sheldon." She cried, betraying her strong façade and crumbling like clay against the love she felt. It was deeper and stronger than a trillion cubic centimeters of water, crushing her and renewing her in the same breath.

Reaching up, Sheldon wiped her tears with a gentle finger, taking one salty drop and bringing it to his lips. He wanted part of her to live inside part of him, forever. If they could exchange hearts, Sheldon would have gladly agreed. Her wet, brilliant eyes met his, and he felt the air in his body abandon him.

"Would you do me the honor of sharing my life? Give me the greatest gift? Make me the happiest man…the _luckiest_ man in the Universe… by becoming my wife?" Sheldon's voice was tender and pleading.

"Is this really happening?" Amy whimpered as Sheldon pulled her close.

He closed his eyes, knowing this moment would never be erased from his memory. The tender way she clung to him, the softness of her touch, and the gentleness of her voice. She was nothing but a woman. Soft, lovely, his. He would protect her with his dying breath.

"Yes, my love. It's really happening," He promised, running his free hand through her soft and silky locks. Together they cried, years of longing and love finally finding a home. It was too much. This was too much…

Amy pulled back, her face a mask of pure joy.

"Yes." She whispered, staring at Sheldon with sparkling green eyes. They looked like emeralds that were on fire. Sheldon's breath stuttered in his lungs as he witnessed the beautiful majesty of Amy in joy. He was certain in that moment that witnessing Heaven couldn't compare. He let out a deep sigh, relief and happiness coursing through him.

"Well that's enough of that," He laughed, mimicking their words on the night he asked her to be his girlfriend, so many years ago. Amy burst into laughter, both of their hands trembling as he slid the engagement ring on her finger. She stared at her outstretched hand a moment, unable to comprehend how right that ring looked there.

"I've waited years for this. I never…never gave up hope, Sheldon. I knew you were the One. I knew it." She cried. Sheldon lowered his head, kissing their clasped hands softly.

"How? How did you know it?" He questioned tenderly, still holding her hand…his gaze fixed to his grandmother's ring sitting there on her finger. It looked…perfect. There were no words to describe how very perfect it looked.

"Faith, I guess. Faith in you, Sheldon."

His eyes shot to hers, stunned.

"No one ever had faith in me before," He whispered in awe, overwhelmed. Amy cupped his cheek, the touch of their skin against each other electric.

"Oh, Sheldon…I have more faith in you than you could possibly imagine. I love you so much. You'll never understand just how much," She sobbed, bowing her head to study the magnificent ring on her finger.

Sheldon's ring. She was betrothed to Sheldon Lee Cooper. She was going to be his _wife_.

Sheldon raised her chin, and it was there that Amy saw it. Complete and total commitment. The vast amount of love in his eyes startled her.

"You're mistaken, Amy Farrah Fowler. I _do _understand. And one day…_you'll_ understand how much." He said with feeling, drawing her into his arms and kissing her soundly.

The few onlookers in the car began to clap, choruses of 'Aww' ringing out. Sheldon and Amy heard none of it, though, content in their little bubble of rapture. Pulling apart, they each laughed through their tears, hugging each other tightly.

"I'm engaged." Amy whispered in his ear. Sheldon nodded tenderly.

"Me too." He whispered, pulling back and staring deeply into her eyes. Amy felt her heartrate increase to a dangerous level as Sheldon ran his fingers down her cheek. "I promise you, Amy…I will make you a good husband."

Amy stared at the man she loved in utter devotion.

"Of that, I have little doubt. Just you wait until I get you back to that B &amp; B. You're in deep trouble, Dr. Cooper," She promised, sliding her arms up and around his neck. Sheldon closed his eyes, his body already anticipating what was to come. Ever the wit, he slid his lips along Amy's neck until he reached her ear.

"Does that mean they'll be no banjo playing tonight?" He questioned humorously, nibbling her ear for effect.

Amy giggled throatily, the sexy sound driving Sheldon crazy.

"Oh…they'll be playing alright. Just of other, more _slightly_ interesting instruments," She sassed, turning her head to catch his shocked expression before capturing his lips with her own.

"Vixen," He whispered happily.

Amy smiled, running her nose along his chin.

"But you love me that way, Dr. Cooper." She cooed, and Sheldon had no defense to argue.

"Oh, Dr. Fowler…you have _no_ idea."

It was a Merry Christmas, indeed.

A/N – Thank you for reading. X


	40. Chapter 40

~Chapter 40~

A/N – Thank you all for the beautiful reviews. I am so very pleased everyone enjoyed Sheldon's proposal. The idea to have him propose on a train came to me after I pondered the fact although Sheldon loves trains, Amy's experiences with them haven't been so great (Valentine's Day, and of course, when he left her to ride the rails). I wanted Amy to have a wonderful train memory, so that one day, they could enjoy a train trip together. Hmm…Spoiler alert, perhaps? :)

My story is nearing its timely end; there are about 2-3 chapters plus epilogue. I have great plans for the future of our favorite power couple. While only a few chapters remain, they are IMPORTANT ones, obviously. Please have patience as I tie up loose ends, fit in all the juicy details I want to include, and give our couple the wedding and wedding _night_ they deserve. Besides…we'll need something to tide us over while on hiatus. As always, thank you for taking this journey with me. I hope you enjoy the ending.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…I had a good life - Before you came. I had my friends and my freedom - I had my name. Still there was sorrow and emptiness - Until you made me glad. Oh, in this love I found a strength, I never knew I had. And this love… (this love) Is like nothing I have ever known. Take my hand, Love. I'm taking you home. I'm taking you home…" Don Henley – Taking You Home

Sheldon awoke to a crack of thunder, his eyes burning against the predawn light. As his hazy mind came into focus, he realized it wasn't daylight illuminating the room, but lightening. It had been raining non-stop for the last twenty-four hours, the rare deluge bringing the city of Pasadena to a standstill.

Sheldon squinted at the bedside clock, annoyed that it was not yet 5:00 am. It took him forever to fall asleep last night, and now it seemed he wouldn't be returning to slumber anytime soon. He hated not acquiring sufficient REM sleep. The fact it was a Saturday and he could sleep in if he chose made him feel better, at least.

His heart was still pounding, a fingerprint of the disturbing dream he had been having before he was jolted awake. Looking over quickly, he was relieved to see his fiancé sound asleep, her pale skin luminescent in the near darkness and her long locks in an adorable tangle.

_It was just a dream_, he tried to reassure himself, his eyes refusing to leave Amy. She looked so peaceful and content in her slumber, her body turned towards his in trust and warmth.

A deep love that never failed to overcome him pierced his heart. But that was nothing new; it was the same phenomenon he experienced every single time he looked at her. Hell, when he even _thought _of her these days. She made his entire world feel like he was living inside a magnificent rainbow - The colors, warmth, and majesty enveloping him like a warm coat.

He stared at her silently for a few moments, trying to calm his rapid heart rate down. Watching her sleep was always a source of peace for the Physicist. Having her so close to him, sharing his space with her…it was the best decision he ever made.

But how could he have known that day when he strolled into the coffee shop with an attitude of derision that his life would never be the same? He was a fool to think he could have ever fought against the forces at work to ensure he and this remarkable woman would forge a future together. What if he had stubbornly refused to go that day? What if Amy had met another man there instead? He knew he had pushed her away so many times over the years; it was a mystery and a blessing that she had waited for him to wake up. The alternative was too bleak to contemplate.

He never wanted to even entertain those blasphemous thoughts. Besides, each time he remembered just how closely they were connected, he knew his fears were baseless. Nothing and nobody could keep them apart.

There were days he wanted so badly to just tell Amy his secret. It had almost slipped out a hundred times in the last four months. Yet he knew, he only had a little while longer to wait until he could share with her the depth of their bond. As Meemaw had said when she gave him the ring…Amy had to be 100% ready to hear such a thing. The setting had to be perfect. And in Sheldon's mind, in order for it to be perfect, they had to be husband and wife.

He often marveled at how old fashioned his new way of thinking was. As Scientists, he and Amy never put much stock in a previous antiquated notion such as wedlock. Yet after doing a lot of soul searching the last few months, Sheldon knew Amy deserved nothing less than complete and total devotion. He wanted her to know the depth and breadth and height of his commitment to her. He wanted to proclaim in the eyes of the law and man that she belonged to him, and he to her. He wanted their union to be sealed in front of everyone they held dear. He wanted to give her his name. Then, and only then, would he give her back the item that she had so faithfully tossed into the sea one fateful day.

Sheldon felt a deep responsibility for Amy, and he surmised that bottle was a big part of it. The fact _he _had found it, a veritable needle in a haystack, was proof enough for him.

Sheldon's heartbeat slowed to a less dangerous pace, and next he tried to relax his lungs by taking a deep, cleansing breath. He pulled up the covers to his chin whilst settling back against the headboard, and closed his eyes.

The last two months had been a whirlwind for the couple. After their Christmas engagement, they disembarked the wine train and headed to the B &amp; B in the cool, crisp air with the other travelers.

The B &amp; B was just as quaint and peaceful as he remembered, the exception this time being they were sharing a room. The place was decorated for Christmas, and rather than being kitschy or overdone, the effect was charming. A roaring fire greeted them in the living room, fresh baked cookies and hot chocolate on the coffee table, and warm blankets were heaped upon the sofa for anyone who wanted to gather downstairs by the massive blue spruce Christmas tree. The Inn Keeper from last trip checked them in, smiling slyly at Sheldon as he signed the register for the double room.

She remembered him from last time; obviously, he was a very handsome man. But that wasn't what stuck out in the woman's memory. It wasn't very many guests who _insisted_ on having an assigned spot at both the dining table and on the settee. He had seemed fussy and out of place last time. He was acting much calmer this time around, though, and when she caught sight of the sparkler on Amy's finger, she had a good idea why.

"That is a gorgeous ring, Miss." She said to Amy, motioning to said ring with her chin. Amy's eyes went wide as she looked down at the ring in question.

"Thank you. My boyfriend just proposed to me," Amy said joyfully, staring up and Sheldon with wide eyes.

It was her eyes that caught Sheldon off guard. Normally, Amy's eyes were beautiful. Deep, green, and soulful. Yet tonight, on this most sacred of occasions, her eyes positively glowed with happiness. Sheldon had coughed to catch his breath as his fiancé gazed at him with nothing short of complete adoration.

'_Say something profound, you idiot_,' He chided himself, lost in the deep sea of her orbs.

"We're engaged," Sheldon blurted out happily, his blue eyes twinkling at the older woman. Her eyes drifted back and forth between the pair.

"Congratulations! Merry Christmas, indeed." The woman intoned, smiling sweetly as Amy who ducked her head shyly.

"Thank you," Sheldon mouthed quietly, taking the old fashioned key out of the woman's hand and picking up the handles of his and Amy's carry-ons with the other. Amy followed him dutifully up the stairs.

When they arrived on the second story, walking side by side to their room, Sheldon was overwhelmed with a feeling of déjà vu. It was so much like their last trip here; walking Amy back to her room after dinner, keeping her steady after she had had too much wine. He remembered sitting her down on the settee to pull back her bed covers, wanting more than anything to kiss her…before she fell asleep and he carried her to the bed. He remembered feeling frightened of the feelings coursing through him. And he remembered how he dreamt of her that night.

It seemed like a lifetime ago, and yet, it was merely 22 months.

So much had happened since then…

This time, however…neither one was drunk. Neither one was nervous. And neither one had any doubts.

Amy stepped over the threshold tentatively, standing by the fire with her hands clasped. Sheldon closed the door quietly behind him, clicking the lock and dropping their bags on the floor. They smiled at each other, Sheldon slowly walking up to her and taking her hands in his own.

"Are you…is this what you want?" Amy whispered, and Sheldon didn't have to question what she meant. He gently took her into his arms and walked her backward towards the bed. They held each other silently a few moments before he pulled back to look at her.

"You are _always_ what I want, Amy Farrah Fowler. You've made me so happy. I don't know what I did to deserve you, but thank you. Thank you for saying yes," He whispered, reaching up and cupping Amy's cheek. She could barely breathe as Sheldon lowered his lips to hers.

He lowered her down with infinite care, not breaking their heated connection as he devoured her lips with his own. He wasted little time in undressing his beloved, running warm hands over her overheated flesh with sensuous precision. She was now his betrothed; meant for him alone. His pulse raced as he imagined how exciting it would be to make love to her soon as his _wife_.

Amy ran her hands across his back and down to his waist, causing shivers to erupt everywhere. When she unbuttoned his shirt and yanked if off of him, Sheldon gasped. He assisted her, raising his undershirt over his head and mussing his hair adorably.

"I want you so much, Amy. I can't wait to be a part of you," He whimpered throatily as Amy pulled his belt free of his pants. Her fingers gently grazed him and he moaned loudly.

"Make love to me," She demanded hotly, all teasing and banter gone. She removed the last of her clothing herself as Sheldon's eyes devoured her. She was like a ripe peach, succulent and sweet. He wanted to loose himself in her nectar and never come back.

Amy's eyes ran up and down Sheldon's lanky yet muscular frame, lingering on his chest and arms. The way she looked at him when their gazed locked made him gulp.

"Is that look in your eyes what you meant when you said I was in trouble?" He whispered, taking himself in hand and stroking once, twice…Amy laid back on the bed with her eyes wide, watching him.

"I…Maybe I'd better rethink that threat. It seems_ I'm_ the one in trouble," She murmured, her eyes falling shut as Sheldon kissed a path up her leg, to her thigh, stopping to lay a kiss upon her mound. Amy gasped and opened her legs wider as Sheldon gently nibbled her tender flesh.

"Oh…" She moaned, no further foreplay needed as his eyes burned a path up and down her body as surely as if his hands were. Sheldon slid up the bed, coming to rest his weight upon her. He gripped her hands in his own, sliding inside of her in one push. They were both more than ready to be joined, and the gasp of pleasure they each emitted would have embarrassed them both if they had cared. But at the moment, neither did.

"Yes…Oh. Yes…" Sheldon sighed, Amy's heated flesh surrounding him in rapturous delight. She was warm, tight, and perfect. Her green eyes blazed into his as they moved together slowly, neither one in a hurry to end their connection.

"Sheldon…you feel…wonderful." Amy cried, her body undulating beneath his. She wrapped her legs around his hips, a guttural groan escaping as he slid deeply inside of her. Her heel slid against his backside, drawing him closer to her.

"And you…you feel like paradise, Amy. I love you, so much." He attested, pulling back to prolong the pleasure before plunging forward again.

The world suddenly stopped that night for Sheldon Cooper. Each moment seemed to lengthen as he touched, kissed, gifted, and took. Each moan and sigh a symphony in his ears. Each caress against his skin or touch with her lips against his skin met with deep groans and words he never imagined to utter. He felt like an unchained tiger, set free to experience the deepest pleasure imaginable. They explored each other. Enjoyed each other. Gave everything they had to each other.

More than once during the night, Amy's ring would flash across his vision, setting his body on fire anew. He would show her in every way what she meant to him. Pleasure her beyond her wildest thoughts. They made love deep into the night, falling into an exhausted heap sometime close to dawn.

They spent the next day exploring the town, Sheldon feeling more prideful and happy than ever before. As he strolled the quaint town with his fiancé, he felt the world was finally at right.

When they arrived back home on December 27th, it was to a chorus of well wishes and hugs. Leonard must have spilled the beans, as the entire gang was awaiting them at Penny and Leonard's place.

Penny nearly had a stroke when she learned of Sheldon's proposal, grabbing Amy and breaking into sobs on her friend's behalf. The guys all congratulated Sheldon, of course, not at all surprised where the couple was headed after the year they had.

New Year's Eve they all went out, dancing until the wee hours and toasting their good fortune at finding wonderful women to share their lives. Sheldon had never danced so much in his life, finding it easier and easier to cut a rug when Amy was his partner. Penny and Bernadette had practically begged him to dance with them, and Amy smugly grinned, knowing she was lucky indeed. Kissing his fiancé at midnight on New Year's with his ring secured on her finger did _things _to him. Warm, wonderful, amazing things. He was an engaged man. He was soon going to be Amy's husband.

_Husband_.

He had let that sink in for a while, his eyes taking in the revelry of confetti, balloons, horns, and glitter.

After the dust had settled, he made two very important phone calls New Year's Day. First, to his Mother. And then, to Meemaw.

Each had reacted the way he had hoped and expected - with pure joy. Mary couldn't stop crying, Sheldon barely getting a word in as she sobbed, groaned, blew her nose, and kept up a litany of '_Praise Jesus'_ and '_Thank you, Lord'_.

Sheldon held the phone away from his ear more than once as her crying pierced his eardrum. His Meemaw however…she responded with quiet sighs. She knew exactly what he was going to say as soon as he said hello to her. She told him that his voice sounded crystal clear and happier than a man who had crawled through the desert on his knees before finding a cool spring.

She affirmed again how proud his daddy and Pop-Pop would be of him, and that he had grown into a fine man. He'd never felt so proud of _himself_. And that, he surmised, was the best honor.

They settled into a happy, comfortable pattern back at home. Work was just as challenging as ever for the pair, but after a hard day they were more than happy to come home to each other. Amy had begun to cook two nights a week, allowing them less takeout. The group still joined them, pitching in money and happily surprised to find out how good a chef Amy was. It was difficult at first to break Sheldon out of his schedule, but he couldn't deny his fiancé was as wonderful at cooking as she was at everything else. He felt cared for and content, and the feeling was nothing short of spectacular. He promised her that he would start cooking one night a week as well, and Amy smiled in delight.

Everything had been going wonderfully, until two days ago at work. Sheldon had been sitting at his desk and he found himself staring into space. Something felt…off. He thought nothing of it at the time. But then, later that night, it happened again. His eyes had drifted over to Amy in the kitchen, watching her intently as she made tea for them. She turned to find him watching her, offering him a sweet smile that he struggled to return.

The last two days, he had been experiencing a strange sense of worry. It wasn't about the future, since he had no fears whatsoever about pair bonding with his fiancé in matrimony. He really couldn't contribute it to anything specific, but as the days passed, his trepidation only grew. It wasn't until last night that he actually stopped and thought about it.

It was the date that reminded him.

February 26th.

Of course. It had been one year since that fateful day. The day that changed his life forever.

Had it really been a year since he found Amy near death? He had shuddered, remembering walking into her room and seeing her on the floor. His mind knew something wasn't right, but he couldn't allow it to be right. It wasn't until he saw the blood that he knew.

His entire world had shifted in those moments. Everything he thought he knew about himself was torn to shreds. The days after had turned him completely around, affording him a second chance. If the outcome had been different, if he had been a few minutes later…

He had struggled to find sleep last night after the realization hit him, and when it finally took him, he slept fitfully. He tossed and turned, having disturbing dreams about Amy leaving him, dying, and never having met him to begin with. The desolate weight in his chest dragged him under until he felt like he was suffocating.

Coming back to the present, Sheldon sighed. He lay there silently, his mind running away from him. It would be time to watch Dr. Who in a bit anyway. Maybe he could just turn over and try to fall back asleep. But he knew that was going to be futile as his bedmate stirred, wrapping her leg around his own.

Amy sighed, smacking her lips together in her slumber. Sheldon turned his body toward hers, leaning over and placing a gentle kiss upon her nose. How he loved her…she was everything to him. Living with her the last two months had been like heaven. They fit so well together, their schedules meshing perfectly.

"Why are you awake?" She whispered in the darkness.

Sheldon startled at Amy's gentle voice, his gaze flickering down to her. She was watching him with dark eyes, the last vestiges of sleep present there. Sheldon smiled at her softly, sliding down to align himself with her.

"I'm sorry if I woke you. The rain and lightning woke me up," He said quietly, reaching out to softly stroke her brow. Even the tiniest of his touches sent her heart a flutter.

"I don't think the rain woke you, Sheldon. I heard you gasping in your sleep. And I felt the bed shake when you awoke. Did you have a bad dream?" She asked him kindly, already reaching out to lay a comforting hand upon his shoulder. Sheldon swallowed deeply. He could never lie to save his life, least of all to his little Vixen.

"Yes," He admitted quietly, nodding his head in affirmation. "I did. But it's fine. It was just a dream." He whispered, scooting over to pull Amy close. She went without protest, loving how Sheldon felt in the early morning – warm and solid. He molded her body against his so tightly that she felt his heartbeat through his t shirt.

"Are you sure? Do you want to talk about it?" She ventured, not at all surprised when Sheldon shook his head rapidly.

"No. I don't. It…I don't want to even think about it." He admitted, and it was his tone of voice which alerted Amy to the truth. It was something she herself had been thinking of as of late; how could she not? When he reached over and stroked her forehead gently where the faint scar of her head wound remained, it was confirmed.

"Sheldon…I realize what today's date is. I know it's been weighing on your mind lately, and I understand. Of _course_ I do. I mean…I've been thinking of it as well."

Sheldon pulled back abruptly, meeting her troubled gaze.

"You have? Then…why didn't you tell me? That it was bothering you, I mean?'' He asked forcefully, but without malice. Amy shrugged.

"I don't know. Perhaps…I just wanted to forget about it. That day…hell, that whole week before and after…it was hard, Sheldon. I was struggling emotionally and physically, and I tried to handle it by myself. I should have let you in. I should have asked for help, or at least let on that I needed it. I put myself in danger for nothing. I'm a Scientist. I know better. The hardest part, these last few days? Seeing what the approaching date was doing to you. I'm so sorry, Sheldon." She said regretfully, and Sheldon bit his lip as tears instantly formed in his eyes. He reached out, pulling Amy against him again.

"No. You have _nothing_ to be sorry about. I was so selfish then. I should have seen something was wrong. All of the signs were there, but I was too blind to see them. To think I almost lost you, Amy. You can't imagine how…impotent I felt. Helpless. I swear to you, nothing like that will ever happen again. I won't let it. I will admit…the last few days, I've been reliving it. Walking in to your apartment, seeing you lifeless on the floor. It…changed me."

Amy nodded her head, snuggling against Sheldon's chest.

"I know, Sheldon. I know. And you're probably going to think I'm crazy for saying this, but…I think it was for the best."

Sheldon gasped, staring at Amy aghast.

"What did you say?" He questioned, his voice incredulous. Amy took a deep breath, choosing her words carefully before answering.

"Sheldon…perhaps my getting sick was the catalyst needed for us to move forward with our relationship. Maybe if something hadn't 'shaken us up', things might have stayed the way they were forever. My illness forced us both to take stock of our lives, and our relationship. Without almost losing each other, we might never have known just how important we were to the other."

Sheldon felt like the air was pulled from his lungs. While he understood what Amy was saying, he didn't like the fact Amy was content to be put into such a fatalistic position. And for what? Just to make him grow up? He wasn't comfortable knowing the main reason for his recent growth was almost losing her.

Rising from the bed, he slowly paced their bedroom back and forth. Amy sat up, raising her knees and leaning her arms against them for support. Her eyes followed Sheldon as he walked to and fro, stopping occasionally to spare her a glance. The darkness of the room illuminated his tall frame, and Amy watched helplessly as the tension in his limbs was all too apparent. He finally stopped in the center of the room, fixing Amy with an intense stare.

"I would trade everything I've ever wanted in life – winning a Nobel, collaborating with Stephen Hawking, going to CERN…if it meant you never went through the hell that you did, Amy. The hell that _I _went through, fearing what my life would be like if I'd lost you. I never want to hear you say that again. I will not accept that you had to almost _die_ for me to pull my head out of the sand like a stubborn ostrich! As if your life hung in the balance while I came to my senses and woke up. I refuse to accept that," Sheldon said with feeling, his breathing beginning to speed up. Amy jumped up from the bed, racing to his side and urging him to sit on the edge.

"Sheldon…sweetheart. Please, sit. Calm yourself down. I didn't mean to imply that." She soothed, throwing her arms around his shoulders. Sheldon leaned into her, his face nuzzling into her warm neck. The feel of her skin soothed him, her familiar and delicious scent calming his racing mind. Amy rocked him back and forth, running gentle hands through his soft hair.

"I'm sorry, Amy. I don't know why I'm acting this way. It's done. Over and done. I thought I'd moved past it. It's just…" He trailed off, a quiet sob escaping his mouth. Amy sighed, kissing his temple warmly.

"I know, I know," She cooed, allowing Sheldon to cry himself out. It took a good fifteen minutes before the both of them calmed down again, even more exhausted now than when they first awoke. After endless moments of sitting quietly wrapped in each other's arms, Amy raised her tear stained face to Sheldon's.

"I think I knew the first anniversary of what happened would be difficult. And we've been so happy lately; moving in together, becoming engaged. It just kind of snuck up on us. But you're right about one thing, Sheldon. It's over and done. I don't want us to dwell on that horrible time again, alright?" She pleaded softly, and Sheldon found himself kissing her with more passion than he intended. It never failed to surprise him, the depth of emotion Amy could provoke inside of him.

Amy was right. They were here, they were alive, and they were in love. Nothing could pull them apart ever again.

"I love you so much, Amy. Thank you for coming back to me," Sheldon whispered, pulling her back on the bed and holding her tightly. There was no point in revisiting such a dark time, when such bright ones lay ahead.

"Thank you for giving me a reason to come back," Amy whispered, just as sweetly. They stared into each other's eyes for endless moments, each thanking a god they didn't believe in for their incredible fortune.

This was the last time they would ever let the mistakes of the past rob them of their joy.

As it turned out, Sheldon and Amy were late in rising that morning. They spent the better part of the day reaffirming that Amy was, in fact, alive and well.

Dr. Who be damned.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

_**Three Months Later**_

Amy sat beside Penny in the departure lounge, her eyes wandering over to Sheldon and Leonard. They were standing in the back of the room, engaged in a deep conversation. Amy could tell Sheldon was having a difficult time keeping his emotions in check. She knew her fiancé well enough to know his body language. At the current moment, his body was screaming out in pain. And what it was saying, was _'don't go'._

Tears sprung to Amy's eyes, and she lowered them to give her love and his best friend some privacy as they embraced in a brotherly hug. Focusing her attention back to the woman beside her, Amy sighed.

"I know that sigh, Ames. I'm trying to keep it together, here. Please…don't make me start crying again." Penny begged, her voice catching. Amy nodded, but the urge to cry was threatening to make itself known.

"Sorry, Bestie. I know I promised that I would be strong, but I'm having a tough time keeping that promise." Amy confessed, a lone tear falling down her pale cheek. Penny stared straight ahead, sighing herself.

"I know. Me too. But it's only for three months. We'll be back in the fall, when the play ends. It's not like we're leaving for good," Penny promised, and Amy nodded bravely.

"You're right. I know that. But Sheldon and I will miss you both terribly. And we're upset that we won't be able to be there for your opening night. I think Sheldon is more torn up about that then I am," She joked, chuckling through her tears. Penny laughed as well, giving up the fight and wiping her nose.

"Aww, Ames…I know."

The months which passed since Sheldon's proposal were a whirlwind for everyone.

Penny's audition for the Kevin James movie caught the attention of a producer who worked closely with Andrew Lloyd Webber. The man invited her to audition for a play that was premiering in the West End of London. Penny had been shocked when the offer came, especially since her career in Pharmaceuticals was going so well. But after she auditioned for the role and won it, she couldn't deny how happy the prospect of acting again made her. She had always envisioned herself on the big screen, and not the small stage, but she felt honored that such a prestigious production wanted her to join.

She spoke with her boss at the company, and he assured her a leave of absence was fine. If, in three months time she decided to return, her job would still be waiting.

Although he had reservations at first, Leonard supported her and knew this was something she had to do. Acting was always her dream, and he realized he couldn't keep her here if her heart wasn't in it. Penny reassured him that no matter where she was, London or Pasadena, she wanted him beside her. Leonard took a sabbatical to go with her. They decided with everything happening so fast, their wedding would be prolonged even more. After coming to the conclusion the time was right, they eloped to Lake Tahoe.

Amy was heartbroken, of course, in not getting to be Penny's maid of honor or plan her a big party. Until Penny pointed out that she would soon be the star of the biggest wedding in her lifetime: her own. Feeling marginally better, Amy promised they wouldn't have the wedding until she and Leonard returned from London. They had set the date for September 27, the anniversary of their first date.

"So, keep me informed about any plans. And when you find the dress, skype me ASAP," Penny ordered, wiggling her finger in Amy's direction.

"Okay, okay." Amy promised, dreading the arduous task of dress shopping without Penny. Bernadette had offered to help, and for that Amy was grateful."

Penny wasn't finished though, as she gathered up her carryon bags and swung her purse over her shoulder.

"And don't worry. If you still haven't found a venue, we'll scramble to find one in Pasadena when we return," Penny promised, giving Amy a comforting hug.

Sheldon and Leonard had since walked over to the ladies, catching the tail end of their conversation. The last statement caught Sheldon's attention.

"Amy... We can't get married in Pasadena. We have to get married in Texas." He said, his voice sounding panicked. Leonard and Penny stared at each other with a surprised expression on their faces.

Amy raised her brows in confusion. She wasn't aware Sheldon had such a firm belief in where he wanted them to wed. The last few months, they hadn't given much thought as to the wedding details, only the date. She disengaged herself from Penny, walking up to stand next to her fiancé.

"I didn't know you wanted to get married in Texas, Sheldon. I just assumed your family would fly here. You never talk about Texas with much fondness," Amy said truthfully.

Sheldon stared at her, unable to refute Amy's statement. He wasn't particularly fond of Texas, other than the fact his family resided there. It didn't occur to him that Amy might not be thrilled with marrying there. Suddenly a deep fear shot through him. What if she was completely against the idea?

Pulling Amy aside, Sheldon lowered his voice to whisper in her ear.

"Amy…We_ have _to get married in Galveston. We have to spend our wedding night on Galveston beach. That is the one thing I am insistent upon. I can give up the notion of a Klingon ceremony or even cosplay dress. But I can't give in on those stipulations. They are too important to me," He insisted, fearful Amy would object due to the blank look upon her face. He rushed forward, trying to assuage her doubts. "If it's a matter of expense, I will personally fly your entire family to Texas at my own cost."

Amy gaped at him, not sure why this meant so much to him. She doubted Charlotte, Joe, or her parents would object to flying to Texas, but the fact Sheldon was so insistent made her curious.

"Is it because of Meemaw?" She asked gently. Sheldon lowered his eyes, his lashes sweeping against his cheeks. She didn't sound upset at him, and for that, he released a deep breath of relief.

He couldn't tell her the reasons. Not yet. He wasn't one to believe in silly superstitions, and he wouldn't start putting stock in them now. But their married life just _had_ to begin on that beach.

"Partly. But there are other…reasons. It just…it has to be this way. Please." Sheldon insisted, his eyes beseeching hers. As she had no set desire where the ceremony should take place, she nodded enthusiastically.

Sheldon nearly fainted from relief as Amy hugged him tightly.

"It doesn't matter where we get married, Sheldon. If it means so much to you to be married back home, then that's what we'll do," She reassured her fiancé.

Sheldon let out a huge gust of air, nodding.

"Thank you, Amy. Please….just, trust me?" He begged, taking her hands in his and squeezing tightly. Amy smiled widely at him.

"Sheldon…you do know I'd marry you in the drive through for In &amp; Out Burger, right?" She asked sweetly, giggling at the look on Sheldon's face.

Completely forgotten, Leonard and Penny stood off to the side watching them with smirks.

"Do you believe these two? What are they going to do without us for three whole months?" Penny quipped, smiling innocently when Sheldon turned to glare at her.

"Oh, well…we'll have milk in our refrigerator, for one thing." Sheldon said sarcastically, smiling slyly when Leonard slapped his palm in a high five.

"It's a long way to London, Leonard. You may want to rethink your allegiance," Penny warned, and her husband lowered his head in disgrace.

"Yeah, Sheldon. Think again before you talk to my wife that way," Leonard back pedaled, shooting his friend a mock sarcastic glare.

Amy shook her head.

"Alright, you three. Let's break this up before the TSA comes running. I already have a record that we don't want to draw attention to." Amy intoned.

The four of them made their way to the security line, standing awkwardly as they all stared at each other.

"We'll miss you both. Please, call us when you land and let us know you're alright. And…break a leg, Penny. We're so proud of you." Amy whispered, Sheldon nodding at Penny as tears gathered in her eyes. She hugged her friend tightly, before breaking away and throwing her arms around a startled Sheldon.

"I know you will make this girl a fine husband. Take care of her while I'm away. And don't overthink things. And be good to her. Or else," Penny threatened, pulling back to meet Sheldon's watery gaze.

"I will, Penny. Good luck. I knew you would make a fine actress someday after we saw you In a Streetcar Named Desire. Knock 'em dead." He whispered to his friend, who in so many ways was like family to him.

"Thank you, Sheldon." She said with emotion, turning to go.

Leonard hugged Amy, patting her back gently.

"Take care of him." He whispered in her ear, and Amy smiled.

"No problem there. Have fun and you take care of Penny." Amy ordered.

Leonard smiled, turning his gaze to his best friend who was staring at him intently.

And then, there were two.

Leonard and Sheldon stood in front of each other, each balancing on one foot. There was so much to be said, but neither one could voice a word. In the end, they realized they didn't have to. Sheldon reached out and embraced Leonard, drawing him into a bear hug. Leonard stood still a moment, shocked, until he returned the hug and threw his arms around his best friend.

"I love you, Leonard. You're my best friend. Thank you for always being there for me. I'll miss you," Sheldon said, his voice catching. Leonard nodded, patting Sheldon's back.

"I love you too, buddy. Thank you for being my best friend. We'll see each other soon, okay? And just think. When I come back, you'll be getting married." Leonard said in excitement. Sheldon pulled back, smiling a dazzling smile.

"Yeah. We've come a long way, haven't we?" He asked, his voice sounding so much like how Leonard imagined ten year old Sheldon's would have. He smiled through his tears at his genius friend.

"We certainly have." He agreed, nodding once and turning to go.

Sheldon joined Amy, the pair taking each other's hands as they watched Penny and Leonard go through security. A thought occurred to Sheldon then, and he stepped forward.

"Leonard?" He called out, happy when Leonard turned immediately.

"Yeah?" Leonard inquired.

Sheldon smiled, turning his hand up into a Vulcan gesture of goodbye.

"Live long and prosper. My friend." Sheldon said happily. Leonard laughed, shaking his head. He mimicked the gesture.

"Live long and prosper." He whispered.

Their lives were all changing. And as much as Sheldon hated change in the past, he couldn't deny some changes were wonderful. He and Amy made their way back to the car, not saying a word.

"Are you alright?" She ventured once they were safely ensconced in the car, pulling out of the lot. Sheldon looked over at his fiancé, smiling at her.

"I'm fine. Are you alright?" He questioned, watching her closely. Penny was her best friend, and the loss of her for the summer must not be easy. Especially when there were wedding plans to make. But Amy smiled serenely at Sheldon, making his heart skip a beat.

"I'm good. I'll miss them, but…this is a good thing. For both of them. Imagine if our Penny hits it big, Sheldon?" She gushed, shaking her head in wonder.

Sheldon thought back to the first day he met Penny. He hadn't ever met someone like her before. She was pretty, but sweet. Clueless, but street smart. If anyone could put him in his place, it was Penny. She was like another sister to him. And the fact she was now married to his best friend who was like a brother now sealed the deal in his mind. They were family, and forever would be.

He looked over at Amy, dumbstruck again with how fate had brought them together. She figured in to this family, as well. He was amazed at how life worked. Sheldon reached over, putting his hand on Amy's knee.

"I love you, Amy. Thank you." He whispered with feeling. Amy pulled up to the booth to pay the toll, turning to stare at her fiancé in surprise.

"I love you too. But what are you thanking me for?" She questioned sweetly, and Sheldon merely smiled.

"For being you." He said simply, turning toward the windshield.

Amy smiled, biting her lip. So this was happiness.

She'd take it.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"So, how are the wedding plans coming along?" Charlotte asked, shoveling soil into the flower beds as she planted the summer perennials, Bluetooth secure on her ear.

On the other end of the line, Amy stretched out on the bed like a feline.

"Great. So far, no roadblocks. We've booked the most beautiful venue for the wedding. It's The San Luis Resort, right on Galveston beach. It has the most spectacular views of the gulf."

Charlotte smiled as she imagined her baby sister as a bride.

"What is it _with_ you two and beaches?" She chuckled, wiping a drop of sweat from her brow. Amy giggled in her ear.

"I don't know…the weird thing is, in the six years we've been together, we never spent as much time on a beach as we have the last year. It's like…the ocean has brought us together, somehow. Look, I said it was weird," Amy confessed, reaching over to the bedside table to take a sip of tea.

Charlotte sat down on the bench in the garden, throwing down the shovel.

"No, it's not weird at all. Sometimes, places hold special meaning for people. Couples, especially."

Amy nodded, although Charlotte couldn't see it.

"I guess," She answered lightly.

"I can't wait to see you walk down that aisle. I think I'm going to cry my eyes out. I know I will. Oh, Amy…you're going to make a beautiful bride. Are you excited?" She cooed, pulling her legs up on the bench to make herself comfortable.

Amy thought about Charlotte's question.

Was she excited? Of course she was. Who wouldn't be, marrying the man of their dreams?

"Yes. Very excited. When he pulled out his grandmothers ring, I almost fainted, Char." Amy said in wonder. Charlotte bit her lip as tears filled her eyes.

"Oh, Sweetie. I knew the moment I met Sheldon, that he was the One for you. The way he looked at you…it was the most heartbreaking thing. I could feel his love for you. And later, when you both showed up to our place? I really feared you wouldn't be able to work things out. And it was clear to me that you simply had to. There was no other option," Charlotte said forthrightly.

"No, there wasn't," Amy agreed. Thank you again for the role you played in that. If you and Joe hadn't been so accommodating and understanding, I don't know what would have happened," She said seriously.

"Hey, we were happy to help. It was fun having you both here for the week. The kids loved it. Glenn won't stop talking about that sand castle he and Sheldon built. And Sarah can't wait to show him her new teeth that finally came in," Charlotte chuckled. Amy laughed, shaking her head.

"Well...Sheldon and I miss you all, too. Are you sure the kids won't mind being in the wedding? I know they're a bit older for flower girl and ring boy, but…"

Charlotte cut Amy off with a loud laugh.

"Are you kidding, Sis? They can't wait! They are so excited to be going to Texas. They think Sheldon grew up like a cowboy, complete with boots and a ten gallon hat."

Amy snorted.

"Not exactly the Texas they imagined. But I will tell you a secret: Sheldon bought the kids gifts for their part in the wedding, and Glenn's gift _is_ a cowboy hat."

Charlotte giggled, shaking her head.

"Oh, dear. He is going to love that. I wish I could help you more, Amy. Things are so hectic here. But if you need my help on anything specific, call me okay?" She said warmly, and Amy smiled.

"Thanks, Char. I will. Give our love to everyone. Can't wait to see you."

Amy clicked off her phone, laying back on the bed and starring at the ceiling. Everything was coming together. She couldn't wait to be Mrs. Sheldon Cooper.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"So this is he one. What do you think?" Amy asked apprehensively, straightening the gown on the hanger for Penny to see.

Penny squinted as she stared into the camera, angling her head and trying to get a better view. When the dress came into focus completely, she nearly lost her breath. Amy watched Penny's face light up.

"Oh, Ames. That dress is just…wow." She said quietly, putting her hand up against her mouth.

"Are you sure? I wasn't sure because I normally wouldn't wear anything so revealing. But since the ceremony is on the beach, I didn't want to be overly warm. And it _does_ have a lace shawl for modesty. But honestly. What do you think?" Amy asked cautiously, biting her lip.

Penny shook her head, tears gathering in her hazel eyes.

"I think it's absolutely gorgeous, Amy. It will show off your curves in all the right places. You, um…_are _keeping with tradition, and not allowing Sheldon to see the dress, right? Penny asked curiously, smiling slyly as Amy blushed.

"Yes. I am. I don't know if I believe in luck, but…let's just keep tradition, as you say. The dress is crazy to lace up in the back. As you are my matron of honor, promise me you will definitely be there to help me." She said sternly, and Penny giggled.

"Oh, you bet. Leonard and I will be there alright. We're flying home the week before, but I have some loose ends to tie up with the play. We'll join you and Sheldon in Texas two days before the wedding. Are you all packed?"

Amy smiled, zipping the dress back up into its bag and hiding it in the closet.

"Yep. All ready to leave. I can't believe that in two weeks, we're going to be married."

Penny shot her friend a tender smile.

"I am so happy for you, Amy. Both of you. Wow…when I think back to your first date with Sheldon – the one I came on? It's amazing that you ever called him back," Penny chuckled, shaking her head.

"Oh, come on. He wasn't that bad. And I was no prize myself back then." Amy giggled self-deprecatingly.

Penny laughed heartily.

"Don't sell yourself short. You were fine. A little rough around the edges, but fine."

The two friends smiled at each other, looking away in mirth.

"So…how is London? And the play? Are you and Leonard getting on okay there? Is the food alright? Are the people nice?" Amy asked rapid fire. Penny's eyes widened, and she took a deep breath.

"Yeah. Awesome. We're doing great. The play is wonderful. I am so happy. We've gotten stellar reviews. I can't believe I was given this opportunity," Penny whispered, shaking her head.

"Do you think…you might want to continue acting?" Amy asked tentatively. Penny shrugged, looking around.

"You know…I think I will just wait and see what happens. It's been a great experience. And I never realized how much I loved acting until I got the change to do it in something respected. I mean, the London stage! It kind of blows that tampon commercial I did out of the water, you know?" She chuckled, Amy joining in.

"Well, just so you know? I have faith in you, Penny. You can be whatever it is you want. You don't need a PhD to be a star. And you _are_ one. At least, you're our star," Amy said sweetly, making Penny let out a choked gasp.

"Thank you, Ames. I really…love you. You've never made me feel stupid for not being as smart as the rest of you. Even when I've flubbed, you glossed over it. You're a true friend."

Amy smiled, overwhelmed. She could never have imagined someone like Penny would be her best friend. Then again, she never could have imagined someone as special as Sheldon to be her fiancé.

"Thank you, Penny." She said, and her blond friend nodded.

"Well…I've got to get off this computer and actually get some work done. I can't wait to see you in Texas. I will call Missy and we will organize a ladies night before the wedding, okay?"

Amy cringed as visions of half-naked cowboys in hats and spurs danced across her vision.

"Um…let's keep it G-rated, okay?" She asked, her voice high pitched. Penny laughed.

"What's the matter? Worried Sheldon will be jealous if some buff cowboy gyrates his pelvis in your face?" Penny guffawed, making Amy's eyes pop out of their sockets.

"Don't worry. G-rated. I promise," Penny said sweetly. Perhaps too sweetly. Amy rolled her eyes, switching off of Skype.

"I think I'm in trouble," She said aloud to the empty room. Penny _and _Missy?

Dear Lord.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Sheldon watched Amy pack, his eyes following her every move. She was as meticulous in this task as she was in slicing brains. He admired her every move, a tell-tale sign he was, in fact, head over heels in love with this perfect creature.

"Sheldon? Do you need some extra room for anything? I can fit in some more things in my case if you need." She called out sweetly, her back to him as she reached up into the top of the closet to retrieve a box he was certain contained her wedding shoes. His eyes flickered over to the massive wooden box beside the one she just plucked, before fixing on her again. Amy had never asked him what the box contained, and he was certain she had never invaded his privacy and explored it herself.

He had already retrieved the bottle and wrapped it safely away in his suitcase. He was waiting patiently for the moment to give it to her. Everything had to be perfect. And he had seen to it that it would be.

He found the most romantic resort he could find on Galveston Beach, and chose their finest wedding package. Amy assured him she didn't need anything so lavish, but Sheldon was insistent. While he wasn't starting their married life getting them into debt with the cost of a big wedding, he wanted to ensure the wedding would be one his Amy would never forget. He'd saved up money over the years, as Penny could attest, never realizing why. He wanted to give his bride a beautiful wedding, and an unforgettable honeymoon. It was the first and last time he would do this. And being Dr. Sheldon Cooper, it had to be perfect.

He made good on his promise to pay for the Fowler's airfare to Texas, as it was his idea for a destination wedding. Joe and Charlotte insisted on paying for theirs and the kids own airfare, though. The rest of the gang were happy to fly to Texas, as it would be good to get away for a few days. The added bonus was that they would finally get to meet Sheldon's Meemaw.

The couple had spent the entire day cleaning, packing, and getting ready to leave. They would be gone for almost three weeks, after all, and had a lot to attend to before leaving for Texas. As Sheldon stared at his lovely soon to be bride, he couldn't take it anymore.

Sheldon rose from his place on the bed, coming up behind Amy and wrapping his arms around her waist. Amy snuggled back against his chest, her hands sliding up to cover his. They stood that way for endless moments, Sheldon running his nose along her throat and Amy tilting her neck to allow him more access.

"I'm trying to pack," She murmured, her mouth falling open as Sheldon kissed a path from her throat to her ear. Amy sighed, letting herself fall into the cradle of his arms.

"I know. I'm a distraction, aren't I?" Sheldon whispered cheekily, sliding one hand up to cup Amy's breast. She turned her head, catching his lips with her own. Sheldon didn't complain as he kissed her hungrily.

"You are a distraction. A _huge_ distraction," She quipped, breaking away from Sheldon's tempting kisses. He smiled slyly, his hands once again beginning to fondle her.

"You do realize, for the next week we will have zero opportunities to do this. My mother has us in separate rooms across the house from each other. Separate floors, even," Sheldon said grumpily, his lips burning a trail down her neck to the top of her blouse. Amy giggled, allowing him to unbutton her.

"Oh, dear! Imagine…a whole week without physical contact. Whatever will we do?" She parroted sarcastically, laughing sharply at the look on Sheldon's face. So…her clueless fiancé _finally_ got a clue. She always surmised once given free reign over his libido, Sheldon would go wild. She was happy to note he didn't disappoint. In _any_ way.

"You jest now, Dr. Fowler. But just try and stay away from me all week. It will be extremely…_hard_." He said, pulling the blouse off of Amy's shoulders. She felt the cool air of the apartment hit her bare arms, goosebumps breaking out for more than one reason.

"Hmmm..I'm sure it will be. Very…_hard_. But I'll do my best to work through it. I'll use the _hands on_ approach," She said enigmatically, unsurprised when Sheldon turned her around quickly and pinned her against the wall.

"The hands on approach, huh? _That_ sounds promising. Would you care to demonstrate? A thorough Scientist worth their salt would always explain," He pointed out, peeling her skirt down her legs before coming back to unfasten her lace bra in the front. Her breasts sprung out to his hungry gaze, Sheldon cupping them both in his warm and gentle hands. Amy moaned wantonly as he rubbed his thumbs over her hardening peeks.

"I think…I think…" She tried, spellbound as his fingers caressed her flesh and his eyes burned a hole through hers.

"Oh, I _know_ you think. That's the problem, my little Vixen. You are always thinking. Let's not think tonight, shall we? Let's just…feel." Sheldon suggested, his voice ten octaves lower. Amy gasped, both at the way he was touching her, talking to her, and for the fact the great Dr. Sheldon Cooper was suggesting turning off his own mind for the night.

Were worlds colliding?

"Really? And…how would great minds such as ourselves do such a thing?" She asked him curiously, running her hands down his stomach to undo his belt. One hand opened his fly and caressed him, reveling at the silky hardness that never failed to undo her. Sheldon's head fell forward onto Amy's chest as they caressed one another, the room quiet except for their shared moans. He trailed a hand down to her panties, gasping at how aroused he'd made her.

"Oh…I think with a combined IQ of almost 400, we can figure it out," Sheldon groaned, abandoning every thought and pulling Amy to the floor on top of him. She struggled to remove his khaki's, Sheldon laughing throatily as he tried to assist her by using his toes to push off his shoes.

"Well, the pants can stay on, if you need me that badly," He whispered, loving the shocked look on Amy's face.

"You are in so much trouble," She said, licking her lips. Sheldon threw his head back against the hard wood, overcome with need.

"Promises, promises…" He whispered. He knew he was goading his fiancé, but couldn't care less. He wasn't lying when he said they wouldn't have much opportunity to do this until they were married. This would probably be the last time they would make love until their wedding night. He wanted to make it count. And count, it would.

He reached up, running his hands across her backside tantalizingly slow.

"Lift up," He ordered softly, pulling down her panties and helping her out of them. She did the same for him, scooting down to straddle his knees. Sheldon watched her raptly, his body as tense as a bow.

"Dessert is served," She said, mimicking those words from so long ago and throwing Sheldon's mind into a tailspin as she engulfed him in her mouth.

"Oh, my…uhhh," He moaned as she pleasured him, his body on fire.

"Amy," He moaned, over and over as she had her way with him. Every nerve ending was on alert. When he could take no more, Sheldon pulled her up and settled her down gently upon his hardness. Amy cried out in rapture as he slowly drove her out of her mind.

"My sexy Vixen," He moaned, losing his breath when she set up a tempo that made him tremble. "Never stop wanting me this way. Promise me," He begged, pulling her down to kiss her lips roughly. Amy gasped and hung on to his chest.

"I…promise," She cried, unsure where this wanton Sheldon was coming from. Her body was wracked with shivers as he pumped into her slowly and torturously.

"In what Universe does Sheldon Cooper love Amy Farrah Fowler?" Sheldon whispered, his arms holding Amy tightly to him. Amy whimpered as she felt her body spasm, the first signs of orgasm washing over her fast and furious.

"In _every_ Universe," She affirmed shakily, her hot flesh clamping down on his. Sheldon cried out, his release taking him by surprise. They came together, cries and whimpers and screams echoing out into the empty room.

In every Universe, indeed.

A/N- Thank you for reading. I hope the next two chapters make you smile. Cry. And strengthen your faith in Shamy.


	41. Chapter 41

~Chapter 41~

A/N- Thank you for your patience. There is one chapter left, and an epilogue. This chapter was difficult to write. So many feels, so much love. So many tears. I won't lie; the closer I get to the end, the sadder I get. There is a lot to cover, so hang on tight. This is a monster of a chapter. But since next chapter will be equally as big (and feeltastic) I just couldn't break it up. I'd advise having tissues handy for the remainder of this story. The epilogue will also be quite lengthy. I will try to post some pictures of my vision for their wedding, including attire, the resort, and decorations. If I can't link the pictures, just message me and I will be happy to email them to you. On a very happy note, I saw Jim's play on May 23rd, and it was fantastic. I got to meet him and got his autograph, which was a dream come true. We chatted for a moment and I stood there in a daze. He was my inspiration for this story, and having met him, it's completely justified. He is a doll. I wish I could've slipped him the URL for it, but I wasn't that brave. :)

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright Infringement intended.

"…Have you ever been in love? You could touch the moonlight. When your heart is shooting stars, you're holding heaven in your arms, have you ever been in love? Have you ever walked on air? Felt like you were dreaming. When you never thought you could, but it really feels that good, have you ever been in love?..." Celine Dion – Have You Ever Been In Love

Good _Lord_…it was humid. And _HOT_.

The moment Sheldon and Amy exited George Bush Intercontinental Airport, the warm wind which seemed to be _soaked _in moisture slapped them both in the face like a wet towel. Amy caught her breath, feeling her lungs constrict.

For Sheldon, it was nothing new. Even though he'd traded in the sweltering temperatures of East Texas for the milder weather of Pasadena, his body remembered the sultry temps all too well. He gave the heat and humidity a perfunctory shrug, taking both he and Amy's heavier cases in his two hands and leaving Amy to carry their carry-ons and garment bags.

But for Amy, a woman raised on the frigid East coast who now enjoyed the mild weather of Pasadena, September in Galveston was a shock to the system. She stared up at Sheldon in dismay as they made their way to their rental car, smiling wanly as he looked at her with a contrite expression. It seemed her fiancé knew exactly the thoughts on her mind, as evidenced by the way he bit his lip.

"I know it's humid, Amy. But don't worry; the beach is always cool and windy, a brisk breeze flowing in from the Gulf. I've been to the beach on many occasions this time of year. It's nothing like this," Sheldon reassured her.

Amy nodded, using the key button to pop open the trunk. While it wasn't pleasantly cool weather like Pasadena, it did have a certain charm. It reminded her of what she'd heard New Orleans was like; sultry and, if she were being honest, a bit sexy.

There was absolutely _no_ way she'd be cold getting married on the beach here. A part of her enjoyed the idea that the dress she chose was on the revealing side. A smile bloomed on her face, quickly turning her cheeks pink. If Sheldon noticed, he didn't mention it. He probably thought it was the heat. He hadn't seen her dress yet, and she couldn't wait to see the look on his face when she met him at the end of the aisle on their wedding day.

Amy grabbed Sheldon's hand gently, grimacing as their sticky hands stuck together. She let out a slight chuckle, though, putting Sheldon's mind at ease.

"It's alright, Sheldon. I'm actually happy to be here. I've never been to the Gulf coast before. Is it as beautiful as I hear?" She asked.

Sheldon smiled, releasing her hand to lift their cases into the trunk.

"Oh, it is. The water is crystal clear and calm. And the sand is white like powder. I think you will really love it." He said, securing their bags and taking the ones from Amy. He laid out their garment bags which held their wedding attire carefully. Slamming the trunk, he leaned back against the car and folded his arms.

"What?" Amy questioned as Sheldon fixed her with a gentle smile.

"It's just…I'm so happy that you're here with me. Thank you for agreeing to marry here in Texas, Amy. I can't wait for you to meet my family. Especially Meemaw," He murmured, pulling her into a hug. Amy went without question, fitting herself against his chest and laying her head against his heart. Suddenly the oppressive heat and humidity vanished.

"I am so proud to be joining your family." She whispered, but he caught the soft words with his Vulcan like hearing.

"_You_ aremy family now," Sheldon affirmed, kissing the top of her head. Amy closed her eyes, overwhelmed with feeling.

"I can't tell you how wonderful I feel." Amy cooed. She couldn't wait to become Mrs. Sheldon Cooper.

A thought occurred to Sheldon and he chuckled, leaning his nose into her hair.

"Even though it is a hundred degree's outside?" He questioned humorously, pulling back to see Amy's eyes light up in happiness.

"Yeah. Even though it is a hundred degree's outside. But p_lease_ tell me your mother's house has A/C," She ventured, her voice holding a hint of fear. Sheldon laughed, running his hand down her cheek gently.

"Yes. Of course it does. I could never subject you to staying in a furnace for your wedding," He assured her, holding out his hand for the keys. Amy narrowed her eyes, looking at him strangely.

"I'd better drive. Since I know my way around," He threw in, earning a wide eyed gaze from Amy.

"You…you want to drive? Really?" She questioned, depositing the key in his hand. Sheldon sent her a snarky smile which she found absolutely irresistible.

"Yes. I want to drive. I grew up around these parts, and it would be easier and faster if I drove. Now get in the car so we can crank up the A/C. It feels like we're about to be incinerated out here." He ordered, his usual no nonsense tone taking front and center.

Amy shook her head in wonder, making her way to the passenger side. Sheldon opened her door for her, assisting her with the seatbelt before slamming it gently and getting in the driver's side.

More than once along the drive, Amy's eyes strayed over to her fiancé. He looked so mature these days; his face was losing the last vestiges of youth and becoming more angular, more defined. He had put on a few pounds, adding muscle to his already tall frame. His biceps were huge lately, a fact that had Amy smiling to herself. When had Sheldon become such a hunk? He no longer resembled the stick thin man she met in that coffee shop. He had grown. Blossomed even. Everything about him attracted her. It always had, but this older version of Sheldon held an attractiveness that was undeniably appealing.

Amy sighed dreamily as her eyes wandered down his face to his chest, and then his arms as they maneuvered the car.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" He asked her curiously, daring to take his eyes off the road for a second to look at her. Amy smiled, blushing soundly as she turned away in embarrassment. She had no idea how he knew she was admiring him, but decided it didn't matter anyway.

"Honestly? I'm thanking my lucky stars for how wonderful you are, Sheldon. I just…I love you so much. I can't believe you are really mine. I don't deserve you," She said softly.

Sheldon frowned, his brows knitting together. Checking his mirror, he pulled over to the side of the road when he got the chance, putting the car in park. They sat there a moment in silence, cars on I-45 whizzing past them. Amy stared at him curiously, wondering if there was a problem.

"Sheldon? What-" She began to say, but he cut her off with a sharp shake of his head.

"You can't say things like that to me, Amy." He said seriously, dipping his chin to stare down at his hands on the wheel. "Ever."

Amy watched him a moment, not understanding his meaning. When he turned to her and she spied tears in his eyes, she finally understood.

"Sheldon-"

"It's_ I_ that doesn't deserve_ you_, Amy. Never forget that. I love you so much that it hurts. If anyone should be thanking their lucky stars, it's me." He said with feeling, leaning over to caress Amy's cheek. Her eyes slid shut, overwhelmed anew at what Sheldon did to her when he was sweet to her this way.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. I didn't mean to upset you. I _do_ deserve you. And you deserve me. We are perfect together, and for each other. Forget I said that, alright?" She asked tenderly, reaching over to caress his face.

Sheldon nodded slowly, turning his face to hers. The look in his eyes was enough to set her on fire. Love, tenderness, hope, and lust. How she ever doubted this man wanted her in every way was beyond her.

The next thing either knew, they were embracing in a kiss that left them both breathless. They both unsnapped their seatbelts, wasting no time before their lips met again in a heated dance. Sheldon put his arms around Amy, pulling her across the console and onto his lap. The strength at which he did so startled Amy, and she gasped as he continued to kiss her deeply, holding her against him. She ran her hands through the hair at the back of his neck, making him shudder in delight.

"Amy…" He chanted, his soft voice leaving her spellbound as his hands caressed her neck and back. Suddenly the reality of their situation hit him like a ton of bricks. They were on the side of a highway, making their way to Galveston. Sheldon groaned, pulling away from her tempting mouth with Herculean strength. He leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes tightly.

"Good Lord…this is going to be impossible." He lamented, trying to get his breathing under control. Amy smiled, ducking her head.

"What is?" She asked coyly, knowing full well what he was referring to. Sheldon opened one eye, glaring at her hotly.

"You know _exactly_ what I'm talking about, little lady. Every time I'm within a hundred feet of you, I just want to devour you. Why do you have to be so darn appealing?" He asked her in indignation, giving her a stern look. Amy snorted, shaking her head.

"Hey, mister…you are the one who pulled the car over. _And _the one who pulled me onto their lap. If anyone is so darn appealing, it's you," She accused, poking him in the chest playfully. Sheldon's eyes followed her finger, gulping as she curled her hand into his pec muscle and rubbed him gently.

"Amy…please stop torturing me," He pleaded, his voice sounding defeated.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon. It's just…for years nothing moved you. I could have walked around naked and you wouldn't have batted an eye. I guess it is fun to get a rise out of you now that I know I can," She admitted, smiling at him by way of apology.

Sheldon pursed his lips, eyeing her shrewdly.

"Get a rise out of me, eh? Pun intended?" He questioned, earning a shocked look from Amy. Comprehension dawned, delighting her.

"Um…no. Happy coincidence," She laughed heartily, relieved when Sheldon laughed as well. "And good job, catching on so quickly."

Sheldon shrugged, giving Amy a quick kiss on her lips before helping her back into her seat.

"One does one's best, little lady," He drawled in his best Texas cadence, tipping an imaginary hat.

"Oh, Dear. When you talk like that," She trailed off, fanning herself in a pretend manner. Sheldon's brow hit the stratosphere as he smirked at her.

"When I talk like that, what?" He pressed, and Amy shoved his shoulder.

"Stop that. What did we just agree? No teasing. Fair is fair. It's going to be a long week."

Sheldon sighed, refastening his seatbelt before putting on his signal and entering the lane.

"You have no idea," He agreed. Amy giggled, staring out the window to hide her delight.

They chatted the rest of the way about Sheldon's family, and what to expect. Sheldon knew they would be fawning over Amy like a prize steer at the Texas State Fair. He would do his best to keep her shielded from the oncoming deluge he was certain would rein down on her.

"Missy's husband is out of town on a drive until the day before the wedding. But you'll finally get to meet her in person. _And_ little Noah," He said in excitement. Amy nodded, happy that he seemed eager to see his nephew. Between her own nephew and niece, and now Sheldon's, Amy was certain his aversion to children was coming to an end. At least, she'd hoped it was.

While they had discussed the idea of children in the past, they hadn't voiced the prospect seriously in years. Amy couldn't imagine anything that would make her happier than carrying and delivering Sheldon's child. That child would have so much intelligence, it would be scary. And love. More love than she could ever dare to give. As they were just now marrying, she knew the time wasn't perfect to discuss such a thing. One thing at a time, as she wanted a while to enjoy her husband alone before she had to share him with anyone, even their own children.

"So where are we headed now? Mary's place?" Amy asked, looking out of the window and trying to gather some insight into their location.

Sheldon shook his head in the negative, a happy smile blooming on his face.

"No. We're going to Meemaw's. I wanted you to meet her privately before the craziness gets too much. It would mean a great deal to me," He said, reaching over to take her hand gently.

"Sheldon…that sounds wonderful." Amy said joyfully, more than ready to meet the woman that Sheldon adored so much.

They drove for nearly an hour before entering Galveston. Sheldon had been accurate earlier; he knew this place like the back of his hand. He drove down a paved road that held some of the largest and most welcoming homes she'd ever seen. The neighborhood wasn't what she'd call stately, but the homes were beautiful.

"There it is, on the right," Sheldon whispered. Amy craned her neck to take in the panorama.

As they pulled into the large yard of the two story charmer, Amy's eyes widened in awe. Flowerbeds lined the perimeter, and a huge shade tree in the front yard offered respite from the intense heat of the day. The grass looked so cool and green, despite the sweltering temperatures. The house itself was painted in a pale yellow cream, its white shutters and large bay windows a throwback to simpler times. The most picturesque part of the property was the pristine white picket fence which lined the entire house. It was something out of the 50's and reminded Amy of how in this woman's day, the American Dream was to have a house just like this.

Amy could see a family being raised in this house, quite happily. The thought gave her pause as she looked over at Sheldon who was smiling as he looked up at the house.

"Wow…what a beautiful home, Sheldon. Did you grow up here?" Amy asked sweetly. Sheldon shook his head, smiling sadly.

"No, but this was my refuge. I'd come here most days after school, and often for summer vacation until I went away to college. Meemaw grew up here, though. It's her ancestral home. My great grandfather built it. Meemaw and Pop-Pop moved back after my great grandparents died. I love this house. I always have," He said, his voice sounding tender and nostalgic.

Amy blew out her breath, her eyes taking in the property. She could imagine little Sheldon running around this yard as a child. There was a large tire swing hanging from a sturdy branch on the tree. Did he play on that as a little boy? The thought made her smile.

"Are you ready?" He asked her softly, taking her hand in his and walking up the steps to the massive wrap around porch. Amy noticed four rocking chairs resting comfortably there around a large round table. The entire outside of Meemaw's home was comfortable and inviting. Amy knew the woman that resided inside was no less so.

"Yes." Amy said, nodding her head.

Sheldon knocked steadily, resisting the urge to call out Meemaw's name three times. Amy grinned at Sheldon, who ducked his head shyly. She knew him so well.

The door opened to reveal a tiny woman, her diminutive height reminding Amy of Bernadette. She was much rounder though; her happy face and warm blue eyes piercing. They were so much like Sheldon's that Amy nearly lost her breath. Large and round, with long feminine eyelashes that lent her an angelic look. Amy stood still and watched in surprise as Sheldon's entire demeanor softened.

"Moonpie! Oh…it's so good to have you home," She cried, throwing her arms around her grandson. The height difference was adorable; Sheldon crouched down to engulf her in his embrace, nearly sweeping her off of her feet. She laughed heartily, pulling back and rubbing his arms.

"Let me look at you," She gushed, her azure eyes holding his. Sheldon stared right at her, his clear eyes and bright smile speaking volumes. "Oh, my. Handsome as ever. You look wonderful, Shelly." She whispered, stroking his face tenderly. "But I have a good idea as to why you look so impossibly happy," She said, her warm eyes swinging to Amy.

For a split second, Amy saw something she couldn't name. A deep love for her was emanating from this woman; a veritable stranger. Meemaw's laser blue gaze cut through her in such a way that she felt the love and welcome nearly touching her soul. Abandoning Sheldon's embrace, Meemaw took three paces to the right and came face to face with the newest member of her family.

Ever the Southern gentleman, Sheldon did the introductions.

"Meemaw…_this_ is my Amy. Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler. Amy, may I introduce to you my maternal grandmother, Clara Buchannan."

The warmth and gentleness in Sheldon's voice brought tears to Amy's eyes. She swallowed the lump in her throat as the older woman gazed at her with affection.

"It's a pleasure and an honor to finally meet you, Ma'am." Amy said, smiling meekly at the Matriarch of Sheldon's family. The older woman smiled widely, grasping her soon-to-be granddaughter's hand gently.

"The pleasure is all mine, Sugar. I assure you. I've been waiting the better part of 35 years for you to arrive. I've never seen my Sheldon so happy in his entire life. I have it on good authority that you are the one responsible for that," Clara said, smiling at the shy blush Amy gave her.

"I can only hope to make Sheldon half as happy as he's made me," Amy responded tenderly.

The two most important women in Sheldon's life stared at each other a moment, a silent conversation taking place. Sheldon felt the weight of importance in this moment bear down on him, as the two dear women slowly met each other in the middle, embracing tightly. Clara rocked Amy gently, reaching up to stroke her long hair. Sheldon stood back and took in the scene, feeling as though he were viewing it through a dream.

How long had he wished for this moment? Years, he realized, tears gathering in his eyes as he felt totally at peace. Why had he taken so long in introducing them? Perhaps it was all about timing, and now this was the right time. He couldn't imagine feeling happier than he did in this moment. But Sheldon knew, he would be. In less than a week, when he not only made this beautiful woman his wife, but gave her back a gift that proved they were, indeed, Soulmates.

Sheldon turned his attention back to the ladies, smiling at the way Meemaw fussed over Amy.

"Oh…Sugar. I can't tell you what this moment means to me. You are simply beautiful. Let me look at you." Clara said, pulling back to hold Amy at arms-length. Amy blushed as Clara inspected her. Amy met Sheldon's gaze, finding him smiling at them tenderly.

"Uh huh…It's just as I thought. You have picked yourself a fine specimen of a woman, Sheldon." Clara said seriously, earning a giggle out of Amy. Clara shook her head in mock annoyance.

"No giggling, young lady. It's the gospel truth, or I'm dead where I stand." Clara said. She turned her sharp gaze to her grandson, waiting for him to agree. The shrewd look she shot him with made him laugh. Had she been angry, that look would have reduced him to a pile of ash.

"Yes, Ma'am. But you're wrong about one thing," He dared to challenge her, his voice soft. He came closer, reaching out and taking Amy's small hand in his own. Clara raised a brow, waiting for him to elaborate.

"_She_ picked _me_," Sheldon whispered, his eyes turning to Amy and staring at her raptly.

Clara witnessed the silent communication between the two, clearing her throat discreetly. She never thought she'd live to see the day when her Sheldon looked at a woman like that. She almost felt faint with giddiness watching the young lovers so wrapped up in each other.

"Well my younglings…let's get you out of this blasted heat and get you some lunch. You both must be famished. All they serve you on those planes nowadays is a tiny bag of stale pretzels. I've got some fresh squeezed lemonade as well as sweet tea all prepared." Clara said sweetly, linking her arm with Amy's as they walked over the threshold.

The inside of the house was just as charming, if not more so. The best thing, Amy decided, was that it was ice cold. She gladly set her purse down on the settee, Clara urging her to remove her cardigan.

"Here, child. Let me help you. Take off that woolen nightmare. It's hot as the blazes here." Clara fretted, removing a sleeve off of Amy's shoulder before Amy could even respond. Amy laughed, freeing herself of her aforementioned woolen nightmare, depositing it on the back of the couch.

Sheldon shook his head, taking Amy's hand and leading her into the dining room where a huge buffet of food awaited. Amy's eyes nearly fell out of their sockets as she took in the visual delights and heavenly aromas of home cooked food. Clara smiled at both her grandson and Amy.

"Amy darling…welcome to Texas. Here in the Lone Star State, we do it up right. No fast food or takeout like my dear boy here is so fond of," Clara said wryly, reaching up and squeezing Sheldon's ear gently. He grimaced adorably at the gesture. After a moment, he disappeared into the kitchen to wash up and get them some plates, before making a beeline to the table to load up.

Amy smiled a toothy grin, overwhelmed already with love. Clara watched her with a gentle expression.

"It is so good to finally have you here, Amy." Clara said quietly, her kind eyes making Amy feel more than welcome.

"Thank you. I'm so happy to be here. It's wonderful to finally all be together. I'm looking forward to getting married on the beach. It will be a beautiful service," Amy said happily.

Clara chuffed, shaking her head positively.

"Oh! Of that, I have no doubt. The resort you will getting married at is gorgeous. But we both know, it's more than just the setting that will make that day beautiful. It's you. And Sheldon. And all of the love that will be surrounding you. Amy…welcome to our family, Sugar."

Amy fell silent, overwhelmed with emotion. After a few moments of composure, she found her voice again.

"Thank you, Ma'am." She whispered, to which Clara scoffed.

"Uh uh…none of that ma'am business. You will address me as Clara, or Meemaw. And I sincerely hope it's the latter," She said, smiling gently.

Amy grinned, nodding.

"Okay…Meemaw."

Clara smiled widely.

"Good. At least that's settled." Her gaze flickered down to Amy's finger, where the ring she herself wore for over forty years sat comfortably.

"Oh, my." She whispered, taking Amy's hand to inspect it. "May I?" She asked gently. Amy shook her head rapidly in the affirmative.

"Oh! Yes. Please," She said with conviction, tears gathering anew as she watched the original owner of this ring gaze at it with tenderness. After a few moments, Clara's eyes met Amy's.

"Perfection." Clara whispered, squeezing Amy's hand. Amy nodded, agreeing.

"Yes, it is a beautiful ring. Thank you for passing it on to me. I can't tell you what an honor it is for me."

Clara narrowed her eyes. "Sugar, you misunderstand me. While the ring_ is_ beautiful, it wasn't what I was referring to. It was the fact that it's resting upon_ your_ precious finger that makes it perfect."

Amy's eyes widened comically, and Clara could tell this sweet thing wasn't used to receiving compliments. Poor dear…she would have to do something about that. Something told her, that her grandson had already seen to that, though.

Sheldon came back from loading up his plate, setting it down at the table.

"Well, then my love…let's get some lunch. I'm positive the rest of the family will be hankering to get some time with your girl, Shelly. Missy cannot wait to meet her. And your mama can't talk about anything else other than her lovely, smart soon-to-be daughter-in-law. She's driving everyone in her church crazy with jealously," Clara said, spooning some cornbread casserole onto her plate.

Sheldon rolled his eyes.

"Well, I hope the family doesn't try to smother Amy. These are the last few days we have before the wedding, and there is a lot to do. I don't want anyone stressing my fiancé out," Sheldon said indignantly. Clara smiled slyly, spearing a piece of catfish as well as a pork chop.

"Oh, I know that Shelly. And of course, you would also like some alone time with your intended, I'm sure. Good luck with that, over at your Mama's house," Clara chuckled, patting Sheldon on the shoulder.

Sheldon looked up from his food, fixing Meemaw with a confused stare. Clara didn't know if Sheldon was playing coy, or just being obtuse.

"I am well aware that Amy and I will have limited time together before the wedding. Mother still thinks we live in the fifteenth century," He grumped, and Meemaw held in a grin.

Across the table, Amy tried not to laugh as well. Who would have ever thought that Sheldon would be annoyed at not having physical access to her? She offered her fiancé a gentle smile, which he returned shyly.

Clara's eyes bounced back and forth between the two, marveling at the sexual tension in the air. The thought made her smile as she cut a piece of fish demurely.

It _was _going to be a long few days for these poor children. 

Later that evening, Amy helped Mary clean up after the spectacular dinner she made. Mary chided her, but Amy wouldn't hear it.

"Mary, please. You made this wonderful dinner for us, after your Mother prepared that amazing lunch. I've consumed more calories today than I have all week," She chuckled, rinsing a few plates and stacking them in the dishwasher.

Across the room, Mary smiled, shaking her head.

"Well…if it's one thing I love, its feeding people. Especially my children. I'll bet you didn't know Sheldon could eat a whole fried chicken, did you?" Mary asked, chuckling. Amy's gaze drifted out to the dining room table, where Sheldon sat with his nephew in his lap. She looked back at Mary, pursing her lips.

"Ah…no. But he did mention what a terrific cook you are, so it doesn't surprise me," She answered warmly. Mary nodded sagely.

"If you think Shelly is bad, wait until you meet George Jr. One thing you must remember, Amy, is Southern men_ love_ their fried chicken. If you'd like…I could show you how I make it." Mary offered, delighted when Amy smiled delightedly.

First, Meemaw's cookies, and now Mary's fried chicken. She truly felt like part of the Cooper clan now.

"Oh, I would love that! Thank you, Mary. Sheldon made your recipe for me last summer, and I was very impressed."

Mary smiled at Amy, tilting her head. She remembered the day quite vividly when Leonard contacted her about Amy, and how she and Sheldon's friendship had hit an iceberg. It was actually Leonard who told Mary Sheldon had 'lost his mind' over Amy; it was just Mary repeating those words to Amy that made the younger girl think it was Mary who thought them. She knew the moment she spoke to her on the phone that this girl would be the one for her Shelly. She was sweet, brilliant, pretty, and pulled absolutely no punches. She put Sheldon in his place, and probably was the only one who could. Yes, she knew it then, and she knows it now. Amy Farrah Fowler was indeed meant to be Sheldon's wife.

"I'm so happy you enjoyed it, darlin'. And thank you for helping me tonight. That was very sweet of you." Mary said kindly, patting Amy on the shoulder.

"My pleasure, Mary." Amy offered in return, returning to her task. Mary smiled as she watched Amy's precise moves. She was a charmer…that was for sure.

_Yes sir…thank the Lord for this little lady_, Mary thought warmly. _Thank the Lord_.

Missy watched her brother play with her son, a deep feeling of warmth welling up within her. She wasn't used to seeing Sheldon act so…lovingly?

She hated that she felt that way, but Sheldon's past behavior more than spoke for itself. As Sheldon's twin, she knew her brother better than anyone. They shared a bond that Sheldon oftentimes tried to downplay, but she knew they were close. She'd hog tie anyone who tried to mess with her 'younger' brother. And she knew, deep down, he'd do the same thing for her.

When Bobby Fields made her cry in the third grade by dipping her braids into blue finger paint, it was Sheldon who painted the green finger paint on Bobby's chair. When the boy sat down, he had a huge splatter of paint on his butt that made everyone laugh.

Missy smiled as she remembered Sheldon discreetly folding his hands on his desk, his angelic features set into an innocent stare. No one would ever believe that _perfect_ and _unsociable_ little Sheldon Cooper could do something so underhanded. So…_childish_. But as Missy looked at her twin, and his blue eyes met hers, she knew the truth. He had defended her honor. She loved him more than anything for that.

Coming back to the present, she smiled when Noah grabbed Sheldon's nose gently with his chubby hand. Sheldon laughed, the sound resembling a squeak.

"You're really good with kids, Sheldon. I never would have thought that about you," She said truthfully, feeling bad when Sheldon raised his eyes and stared at her sadly.

"Why?" He questioned, truly stumped. Missy smiled, shrugging.

"Well…how can I put this? You don't like messes. You don't like germs. You don't like noise. Or dirt. Or sticky fingers. And from what I remember when we were kids, you don't like sharing. Kids have no boundaries. At least not for the first few years. They run riot all over the place, and it takes patience and guidance to put up with that. They aren't born little adults, mature and with a sense of right and wrong," Missy pointed out, running her hand through her long locks and resting her head upon her hand.

Sheldon stared at his sister silently, biting his lip after a moment.

"I realize that, Missy. And you make a valid point. But…things change. I spent some time with Amy's nephew and niece last year, and found their company to be quite delightful. And little Noah here…he's a sweet toddler. His sticky fingers don't bother me." Sheldon defended, smiling when Noah handed him a red block. Sheldon took the piece of wood, placing it in the correct slot as Noah laughed adorably. Missy laughed, as well. She shook her head, amazed at the change in her brother's patience level. That must all be Amy's doing, she surmised. Another reason to love her new sister-in-law.

"I'm sorry, Shelly. You really have changed. I didn't mean to sound so mean just now." Missy said contritely, relieved when Sheldon waved a hand in dismissal.

"Don't worry about it, Missy. I know I've never been…easy. In my defense, I'm really trying to make an effort to have more patience. While my intellect makes it difficult for me to put up with many people, I realize that my abruptness puts people off. It's something I've been working on. I'm doing my best," Sheldon said, begging Missy with his eyes to understand. To his surprise, she did. She placed a comforting hand upon her brother's.

"I know that, Sheldon. We all do. Good Lord A'mighty…you've changed so much since I saw you last, at Noah's birth." Missy marveled, shaking her head.

Sheldon nodded solemnly, his eyes straying to the kitchen and landing on his fiancé. Mary was chasing her around with a dishtowel in a teasing manner. He smiled faintly before turning his attention back to his twin.

"A _lot _has changed. A lot has happened," He stated, not wanting to elaborate. Missy let him off the hook, nodding.

"I know, Shelly. I know. Thank heavens everything turned out alright." She said happily. After a moment, Sheldon smiled in agreement.

"Yes. Thank heavens," He echoed, startling Missy. When she raised a well-manicured brow in her brother's direction, he back-peddaled.

"Figure of speech," He said, ruffling his nephew's hair. Missy rolled her eyes and laughed.

"Of course." She snarked.

Sheldon pursed his lips as he gave his sister a long, intrusive stare.

"Sarcasm?" He asked.

Missy burst into laughter.

"Amy _has_ changed you. She's gone and street wisened you up. You're catching on quicker now. I'll have to up my game," Missy joked, standing up to take her son from Sheldon.

Sheldon reluctantly let the toddler go, staring after him as Missy disappeared with him to the bathroom to clean him up. Perhaps he _would _make a good father. It was clear that Amy would make an excellent mother. Someday. Soon. Yes.

He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice Amy leaning against the entrance to the dining room, watching Sheldon lovingly. The look on his face as he watched the baby warmed her all over. He turned suddenly, meeting her gaze, and smiled shyly.

"How long have you been standing there?" He asked her, clearly flustered. Amy smiled warmly at her fiancé.

"Long enough," She whispered.

The days passed in a haze of wedding preparations and revelry. It seemed every Cooper and Buchannan in Texas had stopped by to greet the happy couple and wish them well. Most of them would be attending the wedding, but a few weren't. It was as bad as Sheldon feared, and more than a dozen times he had to rescue his lovely bride to be from the clutches of the likes of great aunt Bessie or cousin Wilma. Through it all, Amy was gracious and sweet, never removing the smile from her face.

Sheldon was relieved that their friends would be arriving today. He was looking forward to seeing Howard, Raj, Bernadette, and Emily…but he was super excited to be seeing Leonard and Penny. It had been three months since they left each other at the airport, and Sheldon desperately needed his best friend's support. Amy felt the same way; she couldn't wait to see Penny and had talked about nothing else the last two days. A big part of their lives had been missing lately, and it would be wonderful to all be together again.

After a huge breakfast which left Amy swearing she'd gained another pound, she and Sheldon set out to Galveston Island Beach. He insisted on driving again, and this time, Amy didn't protest. His family stared after the couple in shock as they drove off, marveling again at how much Sheldon had grown.

Amy sat riveted as she watched the flat, brown landscape turn into greenery and sand dunes. It truly was another world here on the coast, and the temperatures were indeed cooler. As they neared the resort where the wedding was to take place, Amy glanced over to Sheldon and wondered what he was thinking.

"Penny for your thoughts?" She asked him, and Sheldon took a moment to gather them. He pulled into the San Luis Resort lot, bypassing valet parking and finding a space. His eyes drifted beyond the perimeter of the property, a feeling of anticipation welling up inside of him. He absolutely couldn't wait to share his secret with Amy. It was getting harder and harder every day. Secret keeping was never his forte, and he struggled with blurting it out at every turn.

_Keep it together, Cooper. Just another 72 hours, and you're home free._

Sheldon turned to Amy, smiling a secret smile.

"I can assure you, Dr. Fowler. All of my thoughts are about you. And they are worth _much_ more than a penny."

Amy sat stunned, her eyes filling with tears. Sheldon leaned over, wiping one away.

"I didn't mean to make you cry," He said sweetly, offering Amy his hand. She took it gladly, kissing his knuckles.

"You didn't make me cry. I'm just so happy, Sheldon."

Sheldon nodded, closing his eyes.

"Me too, Amy."

Sheldon and Amy toured site where the ceremony would take place. The hotel and grounds were simply breathtaking, and Amy found herself speechless as the coordinator walked them through the venue.

The ceremony would take place on the beach, on the grass above the shoreline. There was a large, beautiful gazebo under which they'd stand. The reception would take place in the gardens by the pool. Sheldon had of course booked their finest honeymoon suite, as well as rooms for their friends. Amy knew this day was coming, but to be submersed in it was something else. She walked around the grounds, holding Sheldon's hand tightly as each aspect of the ceremony wowed her more than the last.

They had agreed on a civil ceremony, as neither was religious. To their great surprise, Mary did not put up a fuss or a fight about them not getting married in a church, or at least by a Minister. She said it was their wedding, their lives…and she was simply happy that they were getting married and no longer 'living in sin'. Sheldon knew that was the most he could hope for from his mother, so he'd take it, gladly.

As they wound their way back to the beach, Sheldon pulled Amy aside.

"What do you think, Amy? Does this meet your approval?" He asked her softly. Amy shook her head in amazement.

"It's perfect, Sheldon. Absolutely perfect. What do _you_ think?" She asked gently. She knew her fiancé didn't usually fall prey to the trappings of romance, but she was thrilled he was making such a concerted effort to please her. She watched as his sharp eyes roamed around the property, landing on the beach. He gazed out to sea, and she tilted her head as she studied him. He looked so content, so serene…it warmed her heart and gave her joy to see him look so happy. The idea that she was the cause of that made her smile.

Sheldon turned back to her, warmth emanating from him.

"What do I think?" He asked, narrowing his eyes at her lovingly. "I think…I can't wait to become your husband. If I had my way, I would marry you this very day," He whispered, taking her in his arms and drawing her closely that he could kiss her forehead.

Amy swallowed heavily, nodding at Sheldon. Whatever beautiful force was responsible for such joy, she would never know. But for now, she was happier then she could ever possibly imagine. Everything was falling into place. In less than three days, they would be husband and wife.

They left the grounds, eager to get back to welcome their friends.

It had only been a few days since Sheldon and Amy had seen the gang, yet when they arrived at Meemaw's and the pair rushed out into the yard to greet them, it felt like ages.

"Holy Pastrami. This is some serious humidity," Howard quipped, hugging Sheldon tightly as the soon to be groom rolled his eyes.

"It's East Texas. Deal with it," Sheldon drawled, bending down to hug Bernadette. Raj and Emily were next. "Besides, it gets much cooler once the sun sets."

Raj laughed. Being from India, he was no stranger to hot temperatures. It was fun seeing Howard pull the dickey he was wearing aside to get some air.

"So…Sheldon's Meemaw has the largest BBQ going you will ever see. Let's all get in the house and out of this heat," Amy suggested, after she herself received hugs from everyone.

They all followed her into the house, eager to meet Sheldon's grandmother.

"It's so good to see you, Amy." Bernadette gushed, amazed at how beautiful Amy looked. She had a glow about that Bernie had never seen before. Amy gave her another quick hug.

"It's good to see you too. I'm so glad you're here. Penny and Leonard are arriving in the morning. We'll all be together again," Amy said happily.

Amy escorted the group into the house, Sheldon lagging behind to help Howard bring in some gifts they bought and a lovely bouquet of flowers Sheldon assumed were for Meemaw. Howard reached over to pat Sheldon's elbow in a friendly gesture.

"Sheldon, I just wanted to tell you while we have a minute alone, that I'm so happy for you. Both of you. And I'm proud of you, too."

The sincerity in Howard's voice touched Sheldon.

"Thank you, Howard. I'm glad that we buried the hatchet. You've been a good friend to me over the years, even more so the last two. I'm glad we're no longer at odds."

Howard agreed, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Me too. Now that we're closer, there's something I just _have_ to know. Man to man."

Sheldon raised a brow in trepidation.

"Alright."

"So…tell me honestly. Just you and me. Now that you're, shall we say… active – are you happy?"

Sheldon stared at Howard for a moment dumbly, until he realized what Howard's query was. He was looking at Sheldon with such sincerity that Sheldon found he couldn't deny him. He took a deep breath, bowing his head.

"Yes…more than I ever imagined, Howard. And not just physically, which I can guess you understand. But…the closer we become, the more I love her. Does that sound ridiculous?" Sheldon asked, his voice sounding embarrassed.

Howard smiled thoughtfully, throwing his arm around Sheldon in a brotherly fashion.

"No, buddy. Not ridiculous. Not at all. Good for you. See? I told you that you were missing out," Howard said, and Sheldon tipped his head, considering.

"Well, I wasn't missing out on anything, until Amy came along."

Howard smiled at his friend, nodding his head.

"Yeah…I guess you weren't."

The two friends made their way to the house, shooting each other knowing looks.

The BBQ was a huge success, everyone stuffing themselves silly.

Mary had arrived from picking up George Jr. from the train station, and when he opened the front door and spied Sheldon and Amy sitting together on the sofa, he made a beeline for his younger brother and practically picked him up off of his feet. Amy stared at the man in shock; he was at least 6'5 and had to have at least fifty pounds on Sheldon. He looked nothing like Sheldon and Missy though; Amy surmised he must have taken after their father in the looks dept.

"Baby brother! Look at you. Jesus…I haven't see you in nigh on ten years. I can't believe how much you've grown. Where is my scrawny little Shelly belly?" Jr. boomed, ruffling Sheldon's hair. Sheldon grimaced, but otherwise made no attempt to escape. Amy smiled at the pair, until Jr. turned his attention to her.

"Saints preserve us. Is this the soon to be bride of my brother?" He said, abandoning his brother for Amy. Sheldon's eyes widened in fear as George Jr. swung Amy off her feet.

"Put her down, Jr." Sheldon chided, his voice loud and annoyed. George obeyed his brother, smoothing out Amy's blouse.

"Sorry 'bout that, Sugar. I didn't mean to rustle your feathers," George apologized. Amy smiled, waving her hand.

"Oh, it's fine. It's a pleasure to meet you George." Amy said jovially.

Jr.'s eyes lit up.

"The pleasure is all mine, Sugar. Welcome to the family."

Sheldon took his brother away to meet his friends, happy to have Amy safely away from him. With two days to go before the wedding, he couldn't run the risk of Jr. harming Amy by mistake. The man was a behemoth. Amy rolled her eyes at Sheldon's overprotectiveness, turning to find Missy laughing behind her.

"It seems our oaf of a brother has arrived," She chuckled, and Amy nodded.

"Yes. It seems so. Is he always so…imposing?" Amy asked, smiling slightly when Missy guffawed loudly.

"Oh, yeah. But I wouldn't go worrying about Sheldon. He looks like he can hold his own now against Jr."

Amy turned to watch the brother's chatting, happy to note there didn't seem to be much tension between them. Hopefully all the animosity from childhood was gone. At least, it seemed that way. She turned back to find Missy eyeing her up and down with a smile on her face.

"What is it?" She questioned, anxiety creeping up as Missy folded her arms across her ample bosom.

"It's no wonder my brother is head over heels for you." Missy stated gently. Although the sentiment touched Amy, she found herself needing Missy to elaborate.

"And why is that?"

Missy used one hand to gesture up and down in front of Amy.

"Well, for one thing, you resemble a goddess for Sheldon. His ideal woman growing up was Wonder Woman. You know, Lynda Carter?

Amy's eyes widened.

"Really?" She asked, genuinely surprised. While she had wondered in the past if Sheldon had a 'type', she always assumed if he did, it wouldn't have been anyone who resembled her. Missy must have picked up on Amy's confusion, because she frowned at her.

"Come on, Amy. Look in the mirror. You have a smoking hot figure. Curvy and feminine. Believe me, girl. My brother was never interested in stick figures. It's obvious he can't keep his eyes off of you."

Amy blushed, remembering just how amorous Sheldon could be.

"Well…there was a time I thought your brother wouldn't spare me a second glance. I'm happy to say those days are long gone. It's nice…being the object of Sheldon's affections."

Missy smiled warmly.

"Amy? I know we don't know each other very well yet, but…do you trust me?"

Amy raised a brow at her soon to be sister-in-law's ominous tone.

"Um…yes?" Amy ventured, her words sounding more like a question than an affirmation. Missy chuckled.

"Good. Because I am dying to see you gussied up for the party tomorrow night. I can see you are comfortable in your own skin. That's a good thing. But I think it would be a very good thing for Sheldon to see you dressed in something Texas approved. What do you say? Put yourself in my capable hands?" Missy asked, her blue eyes wide and hopeful.

Amy shrugged. Sure, she trusted Missy. She was Sheldon's twin, after all. And she thought it would be fun to throw caution to the wind for one night and play the part of a Texas bride. She put her hands on her hips, smiling uncertainly.

"I shall put myself in your capable hands. Do your worst," She chuckled nervously, feeling marginally better when Missy smiled gently.

"Good Lord, girl. Don't look so panicked. I will have you know, I was Miss Galveston 2001. And I did my own hair and makeup."

Amy nodded, reasoning that Missy was a beautiful, sexy woman. If anyone other than Penny could do her magic on Amy, it was this gorgeous creature.

"Well then…how can I deny Miss Galveston?" She asked rhetorically. Missy was so excited, she nearly burst out of her skin.

"Yes! You won't be sorry, Amy. I promise.

Sheldon and Amy were in the backyard swinging on the porch swing after everyone had left. It was a good night, and they were all exhausted.

George Jr. went back to Mary's house, opting to stay in his old room until the wedding. Raj, Emily, Howard, and Bernadette had gone back to the resort, with plans to meet back at Mary's for lunch tomorrow before making final plans for Sheldon's bachelor party and Amy's bachelorette party.

It was nice being out here in the near moonlight, with the stars of the Texas sky twinkling above them. Sheldon held Amy close as they swung together, not saying a word and simply enjoying each other's presence. Nearly an hour passed in this fashion, before Sheldon glanced at his watch. It was nearing ten pm.

"We'd better make our way back to Mama's house. It's late," Sheldon pointed out, swinging his legs of the swing carefully. Amy didn't say a word, but followed his lead.

"Are you happy, Amy?" He asked her suddenly, and Amy sat up abruptly to stare at him.

"Of course I am, Sheldon. I'm very happy. It was wonderful, having our friends arrive. And your brother! What a riot he is. I heard him tell Howard and Raj that he can pick up a couch all by himself."

Sheldon snorted at that, shaking his head.

"Yes, it's true. I lived in fear of him all throughout my childhood. But I'm happy to say, he's changed. We had a nice conversation tonight, and have come to a new understanding."

Amy smiled, squeezing Sheldon's hand.

"That is wonderful, Sheldon. I'm so glad for both of you."

Sheldon nodded, helping Amy off of the swing.

"Me too. Family should be there for each other. I realized something tonight; I've kept my siblings at arms-length for years. I let my negative experiences of the past influence my present outlook for the future. George is my big brother. He's a good man. Missy is my twin. She's the mother of my nephew. I don't know why I've been so aloof with them," He wondered out loud.

Amy had a good idea, judging from what Sheldon had told her when they once made a fort. George and Missy had often excluded Sheldon from their clique, and it hurt Sheldon dearly. He had learned to guard his heart against further pain by acting superior to them. But those days were gone. They were all grown up, all married and getting married. It was time to put the pain of the past aside, and live in the moment.

"You were hurt by the way they treated you growing up, Sheldon. You were all children. But it's clear now, that they want a relationship with you. I think it would do you the power of good to nurture that. Like I told you when he was born, Noah needs his Uncle Sheldon to guide him. You could teach him things that no one could." Amy said gently.

Sheldon listened to Amy's passionate words, feeling chastised. She was right. He met he eyes, offering her a radiant smile.

"You are the smartest person I've ever known, Dr. Fowler," He said in wonder. Amy returned his radiant smile, adding a giggle to the mix.

"And don't you _ever _forget it, Dr. Cooper." She said saucily, winking at him for effect.

Sheldon sighed happily.

"Let's go, Vixen. Time to bring you home and tuck you in." He whispered.

Amy took his hand, following him dutifully down the stairs.

"Good Lord, Sheldon. You're going to wear a hole in my carpet. Would you just sit down, please?"

Sheldon turned to glare at his mother as respectfully as he could. Mary raised a brow in challenge.

"I'm just worried that they missed their plane. Or that the rental car lost their reservation. Or-"

Mary stood up, flailing her arms wildly.

"I said sit down, boy. Now! Their flight is on time. I think they're running late due to rush hour traffic in downtown Houston. Just calm yourself before you give you and me both grey hair."

With no choice, Sheldon obeyed his mother. Amy brought out a tray laden with tea, coffee, and pastries.

"Mary is right, Sheldon. They'll be here soon. Just relax," Amy said soothingly, and Mary watched in amazement as Sheldon's demeanor changed from manic to calm.

"How…how on Earth did you manage to do that?" Mary asked her, flummoxed. Amy looked up, confusion etched upon her features.

"How did I do what?"

Mary's eyes darted between Amy and Sheldon rapidly.

"How did you manage to calm him down so fast? You didn't threaten him, bribe him, or drug him," Mary said in awe.

Amy smiled demurely, taking a sip of tea.

"I don't know. We just…comfort each other." Amy offered, and Mary shook her head in wonder.

Before they knew it, a car drove into the yard and Sheldon rushed to the window.

"It's them!" He shouted happily, taking Amy's hand and racing out the front door with Amy desperately trying to keep up with Sheldon's longer strides.

They looked wonderful. Leonard had lost a few pounds, and Penny had gained a few. Her hair had grown out slightly, and it resembled how it looked when they first met her. Sheldon couldn't contain himself as Leonard laughed heartily.

"Buddy," Leonard said, hugging Sheldon tightly. Sheldon wrapped his long arms around his shorter friend, happier than ever. Leonard let go to hug Amy, before Penny smothered her.

"It's so good to see you both!" Penny yelled, throwing her arms around both Sheldon and Amy simultaneously. Three months apart had been rough, but being together now was like coming home.

"You look amazing, Amy." Penny whispered, pushing the hair out of her face. Amy stared at her friend in wonder.

"Penny, _you_ look amazing. London agreed with you, I see," She said slyly. Penny giggled.

"It was a great experience. But I'm glad it's over. I'm dying for some sunlight."

As the girls made their way into the house, arms linked, Leonard stopped and turned to Sheldon.

"We missed you guys. A lot," He said. Sheldon nodded.

"We missed you too. Thank you for making it here on time."

Leonard snorted.

"Hey, of course we would. We wouldn't miss this for the world, Sheldon."

Sheldon smiled. Everything was coming together. His friends were here now, and so were his family.

All was well in Sheldon Cooper's world.

Sheldon and the rest of the men stood up as the ladies arrived home, one by one filtering into the house. They had apparently gone to the salon before going to Missy's to dress for the party, and Sheldon was not prepared when Amy walked through the door.

George Jr. nudged Sheldon in the rib with his elbow when he noticed the way his brother was eyeing his fiancé.

"Wow…now you are _one_ lucky man," Jr. drawled respectfully, earning a gulp from his baby brother.

Apparently, the consensus at the beauty parlor was 'go big or go home'. Amy's hair looked amazing, big bouncy curls framing her face, smoky eye makeup that brought out the incredible emerald of her eyes, and a dress that accentuated her figure sinfully. It was black and sheer, ending mid knee and crisscrossing across her chest alluringly.

He crossed the room on wooden legs, nearly swooning as her signature floral scent overcame his senses.

"Amy…you look…" Sheldon began, but was cut off by Penny who popped up between them and smiled at Sheldon sweetly.

"Do not get any ideas, Dr. Cooper. We need her hair and makeup perfect for our pictures tonight. If you want to kiss her, it'll have to wait until after the party," Penny said sternly, dragging Amy away from her shocked and suddenly very aroused fiancé. He watched her pad after Penny, turning around to smile at him apologetically. Sheldon's eyes traced her figure from head to toe, and he lost his breath at the way her legs looked in those stilettos.

"Close your mouth, Sheldon. You wouldn't want anything to go flying in there," Howard quipped, earning a sharp glare from the Physicist. The rest of the men joined in laughing, but Sheldon didn't find the situation funny.

"She…her dress and her hair…those shoes…" He stuttered, feeling a panic attack ensuing. Leonard jumped up, taking him by the arm and leading him to the kitchen.

"Come on, buddy. Amy will be fine. No one will let anything happen to her. You know that," Leonard soothed, handing Sheldon a glass of water which he drank down greedily.

"Leonard, you have _no_ idea how Texan men are. They will get one look at my little moth and be all over her." He moaned, closing his eyes.

"You're…jealous," Leonard said in wonder, laughing good naturedly.

"I'm not jealous. I'm worried," Sheldon defended, glaring at his best friend.

"Uh huh. Sure. You're going to stand here and deny that you wouldn't want to be on her arm tonight, looking as good as she does?" Leonard questioned.

Sheldon shot Leonard an annoyed glare.

"Well…I saw the way _you _looked at Penny. You want to try telling me that her looking so…what's the word? Hot? Doesn't make _you_ crazy?" Sheldon challenged. Leonard rolled his eyes.

"Sheldon, I'm used to men staring at my wife. Trust me. I just spent a summer in London where every hot English dude tried to put the moves on Penny. It happens. But I trust Penny. And you know without a doubt that you can trust Amy." He said seriously. Sheldon calmed down a bit, but his frown remained.

"I know that. I do trust her. It's all of the tri-county area that I don't trust," He stated.

Leonard chuckled, patting Sheldon's back.

"Come on. Let her have her night. She'll be fine."

Sheldon had no choice but to trust his friend's wisdom.

"Besides…it's our time to get crazy. You're getting married in two days, Sheldon. This calls for a celebration."

Sheldon nodded.

"You're right. Let's…get crazy." He reiterated, and Leonard guffawed at how unsure he sounded.

It was so great to be together again.

It was late when the limo dropped Amy off at Mary's house; the ladies heading over to the hotel. Tomorrow was the day before the wedding, and they all had things to do beforehand.

Amy took off the monster heels that Missy had insisted she wear, tip toeing through the living room quietly. An old grandfather clock struck one o'clock, its deep chime startling Amy. She made her way up the stairs to Missy's old room, when something caught her eye out of the landing window. She squinted out of the glass, spying Sheldon sitting in the backyard by the pool.

That was odd; why wasn't he in bed by now? Depositing her shoes on the landing, Amy set her clutch down as well and made her way back down the stairs and through the back slider which led out to the pool.

Sheldon was lying on a lounge chair, with what looked like a beer bottle clutched in his hand. His eyes were closed, but she could tell by his breathing he wasn't asleep. Amy watched him undetected for a moment, wondering what on earth he was doing. He rarely ever drank alcohol, especially beer.

"Sheldon?" She ventured quietly, startling her fiancé. His eyes flew open and he looked at her with tired eyes, putting down the bottle and rising immediately when he realized she was really here and not a figment of his imagination.

"Amy! I was worried about you. Did you make it home alright? Did you enjoy yourself tonight?" He asked her, inspecting her for any apparent damage. She smiled sweetly at him, admiring how nice he looked in his cream colored trousers and powder blue shirt. Even in this darkness, the color made his blue eyes pop vividly.

"I did. I had a wonderful time. The dinner was delicious, and the party was amazing. Everyone got me some lovely gifts. And we had a blast taking pictures. I can't wait for you to see them" She gushed.

Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief.

"Good. I'm glad," He said sincerely. "So…no man tried anything fresh with you?" He ventured cautiously, feeling foolish for even asking. Amy shook her head in the negative, amused by Sheldon's jealousy.

"No, Sheldon. Of course not. As you are well aware, I can defend myself if a man gets fresh. Or a woman," She chuckled, conjuring up a very angry TSA agent.

Completely relieved, Sheldon smiled at his fiancé.

"Good."

Amy gave Sheldon a coy look, eyeing him up and down. He looked incredibly handsome tonight, and her fingers itched to touch him.

"How about you? What did the guys do for you?" Amy asked excitedly.

Sheldon bit his lip, his gaze pinning her.

"They were going to get me an exotic dancer. It was George's idea, of course. But thank heavens, Leonard was the voice of reason. The guys were disappointed, of course…until Leonard pointed out that we didn't have a dancer for Howard's bachelor party. We ended up going to Calhoun's bar. They have line dancing there.

Amy smirked.

"_You_ line danced? Really?" She asked, imagining Sheldon line dancing. He blushed, nodding his head before looking away. It was his shyness that Amy found so damn appealing in that moment that she literally wanted to jump him.

"Ooh…I'd have paid good money to have seen that, Cowboy." She whispered huskily, giving in to temptation and sliding her arms around his neck. Sheldon swallowed as he looked down at her, admiring the way her dress crisscrossed over her bosom. Being eight inches taller, he had a perfect view of her lovely cleavage.

"You would, huh? I could give you private lessons on how to do it properly," He whispered, weaving his own arms around her. He pulled her close, loving the way her soft curves molded to his. When their bodies touched, Sheldon let out an involuntary groan.

"I'd like that," She murmured, suddenly feeling lightheaded by Sheldon's proximity. He continued to gaze at her, noticing how her green eyes turned darker. He felt his pulse begin to race.

"Well, see…first you have to sidle up to your partner. Hold her real close, like this." He whispered, turning Amy slightly until he stood behind her. "Then you take your arm, and wrap it around her waist. Next, you let your hand wander down until it grips her hip. And now, finally…you slide her forward as you step to the left. And then the right. All the while…holding her close."

Amy breathed deeply, the delightful feeling of Sheldon's hard chest against her back making her swoon. Unable to stop herself, Amy released a moan.

Sheldon's hand grazed her posterior, turning her sharply into him. They stood there pressed together for a moment, staring at each other in the moonlight.

"I hope you didn't touch another girl like that," Amy murmured, jokingly. Sheldon didn't laugh or smile at her quip. She watched in longing as his blue eyes darkened, and his breathing increased.

"I will_ never_ touch another girl like that," Sheldon vowed. He took her hand and walked her around the house until they were hidden by the rose bushes. Pulling her close again, he leaned down and grazed her soft neck with his even softer lips. Amy shuddered, her arms clutching his back tightly as her hands wandered up and slid into his hair. Sheldon's lips burned a path up her neck until they reached her ear.

"Amy…do you have any idea how badly I want you right now? It was all I could do tonight to not follow you. The way you look…so beautiful. I need to touch you or I'm going to go out of my mind," Sheldon lamented, laying his forehead against her throat.

Amy completely understood Sheldon's longing. It had only been five days since they were last intimate, but it seemed like a lifetime. It was ironic, she mused. They went years with barely any physical contact. Since succumbing to their passion and love for one another, they couldn't get enough of each other. And neither one was any less intelligent for it. For years, Sheldon feared giving in to his base desires were going to rob him of his intellect. Their physical relationship had only made him sharper and more focused.

She was helpless as he tilted her chin, kissing her lips. Softly at first before deepening the kiss and sinking into her, effectively pushing her against the side of the house. He hitched her knee up against his thigh, evoking images of when he did that a lifetime ago after Cassidy's wedding.

"Oh…Sheldon," She moaned, quickly losing her sanity when he reached down to her hip, pulling her against him completely. Amy could feel his burgeoning arousal, and it only added fuel to an already out of control fire.

"Amy, please…" He rasped, kissing her neck sensuously. He was _begging_ her. In that moment, she didn't know what emotion took center stage: power, or weakness.

Amy wanted him at this moment more than breath. He overwhelmed her senses and her heart was beating out of control. Her body ached for release that only he could provide. But this wasn't the proper time, nor place. Gathering up her courage, she took a deep breath and pulled back a tad from his pleasurable hold.

"Sheldon…one more day. We just have to wait one more day," She whispered, and Sheldon got the impression she was trying to convince herself as well as him. Her voice said one thing, yet her body said another. She trembled against him, her accelerated breath giving her desire away.

"Amy…I need you," He groaned, closing his eyes tightly. He feared it was going to be a long and uncomfortable night ahead for him.

Amy sighed, tempting fate and caressing his soft cheek.

"Sheldon…we can't do this now. Not with your mother upstairs. It wouldn't be right," She stated, and that little reminder was like a douse of cold water to Sheldon.

"Good Lord, woman…do you know what it's like to want something so badly that's right within your reach?" He whined, his eyes wild.

Amy stared at him incredulously, cocking a brow.

"Very much so," She deadpanned, earning a chuckle out of Sheldon.

"Yes. I suppose you do," He relented, not releasing his grip upon her. Sheldon hugged her tightly, running his fingers through her bouncy hair.

"I like this. It's very Texan," He murmured, leaning down to inhale the delicious fragrance of her hair. Amy smiled, nuzzling into Sheldon further.

"Well you know what they say in Texas, Sheldon." She cooed, and Sheldon shot her a wide eyed stare.

"What do they say, little lady?"

"Go big or go home."

Sheldon laughed sharply in delight.

"Oh…don't you worry. It's _definitely _big," He murmured, kissing her forehead tenderly. Amy giggled at the double entendre, breaking free and moving back. The couple gazed at each other in the near full moonlight.

One more day, and they would be married. Neither could wait as they both imagined the pleasures that awaited them.

"Walk me upstairs?" Amy asked sweetly.

"Are you sure you can trust me not to ravish you on the way?" Sheldon asked her, taking her hand gently in his own. Amy gave him a sidelong glance full of sass.

"I'll take my chances. We have to pass your Mother's room, so I'm not all that worried. The odds are in my favor."

Sheldon grimaced, his face falling.

"Good point," He grumbled, leading her inside. Indeed, it would be a very long night.

It was just past six am when Mary walked into the kitchen yawning, spying her youngest son sitting at the table. He smiled when she raised her brows at him curiously.

"Good morning, Shelly. What in the world are you doing up so early? I thought for sure you would sleep in after last night's partying," She said, pouring herself a cup of coffee from the coffee pot. Sheldon sipped his tea thoughtfully.

"Good morning, Mother. I couldn't sleep. Too many things going on in my head. Tomorrow is a big day," He stated unnecessarily. Mary sighed, ending on a toothy grin.

"Yep. You are right about that, Sweetheart. I can't believe in a little over 24 hours, my Shelly bean is going to be married."

The happiness mixed with sadness in Mary's voice touched Sheldon. He knew she had always worried about him, and where his life was leading. She sat down next to him at the table, pulling up her chair close.

"Are you alright, Honey? And fears or questions you want to discuss with me? I know I'm your mama, but I want you to be comfortable. This is a big step. I know you're ready, but…sometimes it's nice to confide in someone who's been there." Mary said, putting her hand on Sheldon's.

Sheldon shook his head, looking into his tea cup like it held the answers to the Universe.

"Thank you, Mom. I don't have any fears. It's not that. It's just…" He stopped, not sure how to articulate his thoughts. But Mary knew her son, and knew exactly what he was thinking.

"You're missing your daddy right now. And your pop-pop. You wish they were here, to see you marry that lovely girl. I understand, Honey. It's only natural."

Mary's statement was firm, and had Sheldon swiftly turning his eyes to hers.

"How…how did you know?" He whispered, sounding so much like the little Sheldon she used to comfort. Mary smiled, reaching out her hand and running her fingers across Sheldon's temple.

"Oh, Sheldon. Your mama knows how you feel. I know you were closer than close to your pop-pop. And although you and your daddy weren't as close, I know you loved him dearly. And he adored you. I know he had a hard time showing it, because I think your intelligence intimidated him. But he loved you and he was so proud of you. They both would be over the moon proud with what you've accomplished, and in making the wisest decision of your life in securing that little girl's hand and making her your wife. I know. Because _I_ am that proud of you."

Sheldon tilted his head, tears filling his eyes suddenly. Mary's heart ached for her child.

"I miss them. Both. I didn't…didn't get a chance to say goodbye. To either of them. Pop-Pop…it happened so fast. And I was away in Germany when dad…you know my issues with closure. I've tried over the years to forget the fact I never got closure. But being here this week, it…brought it all back. They would have loved Amy. I know they would have." Sheldon said sadly. Mary enthusiastically agreed.

"Oh, Shelly…of that, you shouldn't doubt. That girl is plumb perfect. She's the right mixture of sassy and sensible, alluring and demure. She is going to make you so happy, Son. And one day, with the Lord's help…we're going to have some highly intelligent babies in this family." Mary ventured, happy when Sheldon grinned at that prospect.

Her son _had_ grown. She didn't think she could ever thank Amy enough for the love and influence she had over him. She'd changed his life.

Sheldon rose, rinsing out his cup and placing it in the drainer. He turned to his mother and stared at her seriously.

"I'm going to go to the cemetery today, and visit daddy and pop-pop. I think it's something I need to do." He said softly, and Mary bit her lip.

"Alright, Shelly. Would you like me to come with you?" She asked, unsurprised when Sheldon shook his head.

"No, Mama. But thank you. I'm leaving a note for Amy when she wakes up. Will you make sure she receives it?"

Mary nodded, rising from the table and hugging Sheldon tightly.

"Of course I will."

They stood there a moment embracing, before Sheldon broke away and kissed his mother on the cheek. The action startled her, but she smiled.

"I love you, Mama. Thank you. For everything." He said softly, before leaving her to look after him in surprise.

Mary leaned back against the sink, her eyes shooting heavenward.

"See George? We didn't have to worry about Sheldon. He turned out just fine. You would be so proud of him. I took my time with that one. And so did Amy. He's in love, George. More in love than anyone I've ever met. It's just…beautiful."

Mary shook her head happily, going to the fridge and pulling out the ingredients for breakfast. It was going to be a busy day.

The cemetery where Sheldon's Father and Grandfather was buried was only about a mile from Mary's home. Sheldon decided to walk there, figuring the exercise and fresh air would do him good. It was barely seven, so the heat of the day wasn't so oppressive yet.

He pushed open the massive iron gates which led into the small but overly populated resting place, its lawns manicured and plush despite the blazing sun. In all of the years they laid here, he had only visited once. He couldn't bring himself to come, not ready before to face the reality that either one was truly gone. For Pop-Pop, it was bad enough. But he was just a small child then. But when George Sr. died…it had devastated Sheldon.

He had always secretly wished that once he was older, he and his father would have a better relationship. He knew his father didn't understand him, and it hurt him to think they had nothing in common. He thought that once he returned from Germany, their relationship would improve. That never came to pass.

He was now embarking on the greatest journey of his life – marrying Amy and forging a life with her. He needed to have this closure; to feel the presence of the two men he admired but who had been taken from him so abruptly. He didn't believe their souls were here, or even in a place by popular opinion everyone else knew to be Heaven. But he had to say this, for his own peace of mind.

Sheldon found the family plot, sitting on the grass. For a while he simply stared at the gravestones, unable to formulate words. The sun shone overhead, and the birds chirped happily. Finally, he felt calmer and more focused.

"Hello Daddy. Hello Pop-Pop. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get here. I couldn't do it. But I'm here now, and I just want you both to know that I miss you. I love you, too. I've had a good life. No, a _great_ life. I work at one of the most prestigious University's in the world. I'm a respected Physicist. I have amazing friends, wonderful friends. You'd like them, both of you. But the best part, the most miraculous part…I fell in love with a beautiful, brilliant Neuroscientist who has completely changed my life for the better. She's so lovely. And sharp as a tack. She doesn't let me get away with anything," Sheldon chuckled, wiping away the tears which now cascaded down his cheeks. "I almost lost her twice because of my pride. Those were dark days. Very dark. But she makes everything so bright. So happy. Lord…you both would have just _loved _her. Meemaw and Mama adore her. They're already picking out baby names for when…you know. But I digress. One thing at a time. Tomorrow, I'm making Amy my wife. I wish more than anything that you both were here to witness that. But I know, you'll be there in spirit. We all miss you. But your legacy will live on. I promise you that. I will make Amy a fine husband. And one day, I will be a wonderful father to our children. I will make you proud of me. I'll make _her_ proud of me. Thank you both for loving me. And for enriching my life in different ways. I looked up to the both of you. And I can only hope that I love my family as much as you did."

Time passed quietly, and Sheldon had no idea how long. He sat there crying until he could cry no more, finally rising and wiping his seat clear of leaves and debris. He felt better now, and looked ahead to happier times.

He was getting married in less than a day. He had so much to be thankful for. Gently closing the gates behind him, he headed back towards Mary's house with a lighter heart.

The day passed in a whirl of activity; last minute touches and final calculations attended to. After everything was in order, Penny and the girls retreated to the resort to soak up some sun around the pool and relax. Charlotte, Joe, and the kids had arrived, and she and the kids joined the gang by the pool while Joe left to hang out with the guys back at Mary's.

After a massive dinner in town after the rehearsal, Amy transferred her bag into Leonard's rental car. She, of course, would be spending the night at the resort. Keeping with tradition, she and Sheldon were going to part ways before the wedding. Sheldon wasn't pleased, but understood. Besides, there were enough stern females in this group that would skin him alive if he tried to deviate from the plan.

He slammed the trunk after Amy deposited her bag, taking one last opportunity to kiss her before he met her at the altar tomorrow. He couldn't bear to let her go. But he was comforted with the fact the next time he saw her, she would walking down the aisle towards him.

"Mary told me this morning that you went to visit your father and pop-pop. Are you alright?" Amy asked him gently, holding him close. Sheldon nodded, running his nose along her cheek.

"Yes. I'm fine. I just…I woke up this morning with this need to talk to them. That's never happened before," Sheldon confessed, and Amy pulled back to look at him.

"I know. That's alright, Sheldon. You obviously needed to do it. Do you feel better now?" She asked him tenderly, relieved when didn't hesitate to nod.

"Much better. Thank you, Amy." Sheldon whispered, kissing her forehead.

"What are you thanking me for? I didn't do anything," She whispered back. Sheldon gripped her tighter.

"Oh…you are so wrong. I have many things to thank you for. But the number one reason, is that tomorrow you will be granting me my greatest wish."

Stunned, Amy swallowed as tears filled her eyes.

"Isn't your greatest wish to win the Nobel?" She asked nervously, tears choking her voice. Sheldon pursed his lips, shaking his head.

"Not anymore, Amy. My greatest wish is to be the man you deserve. Anything after that I receive? It's just…icing."

The two Scientists stood there silently, holding each other's gazes.

"Sheldon…" Amy murmured, unable to move as he covered her lips tenderly with his own. They clung to each other until Leonard discreetly cleared his throat.

"Um…guys? It's getting late and we should really get Amy to the resort so she can rest up."

Reluctantly pulling away, the couple stared at each other one last time, smiles adorning their faces.

"I love you, Sheldon Cooper." She said with conviction, and Sheldon's smile was heartbreakingly beautiful.

"I love you, Amy Farrah Fowler."

In an instant she was gone, Sheldon staring after the car with longing.

Tomorrow couldn't arrive soon enough.

Leonard knocked on Sheldon's door gently.

"Sheldon? I'm heading out to pick up Amy's parents from the airport, okay?"

Sheldon was sitting on his childhood bed, half dressed in his suit. The knock from the door had startled him out of his deep thoughts. He rose, walking over to unlatch it in a trance. Leonard stood there, dressed in jeans and a tee shirt. Sheldon narrowed his eyes at his best friend and best man.

"Leonard, aren't you dressed?" He asked rhetorically, motioning to Leonard's attire.

Leonard smirked, shaking his head at Sheldon.

"Am I dressed to have an audience with Her Majesty the Queen? No," He quipped referencing Sheldon's words from years ago when he asked Sheldon if he were overdressed to take Penny on a friendly 'date'. "To make an airport run at 8 am in this sweltering heat? Yes." He finished, chuckling at his own joke.

Sheldon gaped at Leonard, his eyes darting around his friends face in confusion. Leonard stopped laughing when he noted Sheldon's trepidation. He came into the room, shutting the door behind him.

"Buddy, the wedding isn't for three hours. That's plenty of time to go to the airport, come back to shower and change. The question is, why are _you_ dressed already? You are going to get all wrinkled," Leonard pointed out, frowning.

Sheldon's eyes widened as he realized the truth of Leonard's words. He was only in his trousers and shirt, not having put on his vest and jacket yet, but…still.

"You're right," He said distractedly, walking on wooden legs back to the bed. Leonard followed him and sat down on the bed beside him.

"Sheldon, are you alright?" He asked cautiously. It was normal for grooms to be nervous and distracted on their wedding day, but this was groom Dr. Sheldon Cooper. He was bound to be freaking out inside. Leonard scooted a little closer to his best friend.

Sheldon nodded, but still looked like he was not thinking straight. Leonard checked his watch, noting he had to leave in fifteen minutes to be on time for the Fowler's plane.

"Buddy…you want to tell me what has you looking like an extra from the walking dead?" Leonard asked humorously, trying to inject some lightness.

Sheldon bit his lip, shaking his head to clear it.

"I woke up earlier than normal. I couldn't sleep. I kept having dreams all night. Scary dreams," He said in a small voice.

Leonard smiled faintly at his friend affectionately. He knew exactly what Sheldon was going through.

"It's alright, Sheldon. You can tell me. It may help to talk about it," Leonard reasoned, drawing his knees up on the bed and facing Sheldon. The Physicist nodded, but he didn't look any more relaxed.

"Leonard…when you asked Penny to marry you…the first time…were you scared?"

Leonard released a gush of air, raising his brows.

"Yeah, sure I was. It _was_ scary, opening up yourself to someone like that. And I knew Penny wasn't truly ready for that commitment. But I love her. It took us a while to reach this point, but we're finally here. Is that what's troubling you, Sheldon? Are you scared?" Leonard asked gently.

Sheldon licked his lips, focusing on a spot on the wall.

"No. I wasn't scared, asking Amy to marry me. It was the easiest thing I've ever done. Isn't that odd? It took me four years to admit I loved her. But once I did…everything fell into place. It was what that psychic told me. I didn't believe her then. I'm still not sure I believe her now…and yet," He stopped, weighing out the possibilities in his head.

"Yet," Leonard prodded, patiently waiting for his friend to come to terms with whatever he had to say. Sheldon turned slowly, gazing at his friend.

"Yet…I'm afraid _now_. And logically, I have no reason to be."

Leonard smiled sadly. His friend had come so far in the last decade. Even admitting a flaw such as fear is monumental for Sheldon. Leonard sympathized with him.

"So…what are you afraid of now?" He asked gently, and Sheldon sighed.

"Well…not being the man she deserves. Not cherishing her. Worrying that five, ten, fifteen years from now, she will regret marrying me." Sheldon answered honestly.

In spite of the weight of the conversation, Leonard laughed softly.

"Buddy, you are in the majority. I tell you that with total honesty. It's nothing that millions of men before you haven't worried about. Saying I do is the easy part, Sheldon. _Living_ I do is the harder part. Being there for her, respecting her, loving her… that is all you need to focus on. Amy is no slouch. She is probably the smartest woman I've ever met, except for my mother. She has gone into this journey with you with eyes wide open. I doubt she'd have any regrets. She practically worships the ground you walk on. In a good way, of course." Leonard chuckled.

Sheldon's interest piqued, he turned and gave Leonard his full attention.

"But how do I know I will be able to do that? I mean…I do. Of course I do. But what if she grows bored of me?"

Leonard put his hand on Sheldon's back comfortingly.

"Sheldon, that won't happen. Life with you will never be dull, and it will surely keep Amy on her toes. Trust me. Trust Amy. Trust yourself. You have more strength than you give yourself credit for. You will make a fantastic husband. You are a fantastic friend. No matter how much you've driven me crazy over the years, you always had my back. I love you, Sheldon. Penny loves you. We will always, always be here for you. Both of you. Remember when you said to me once, 'I've got you're back Jack'? Well, that goes both ways. Seeing what you've accomplished, both personally and professionally…it's been great. I couldn't be prouder of you if you were my own brother, Sheldon."

The sincerity in Leonard's voice touched Sheldon greatly. Sheldon gulped, his eyes watering. What would he have done without Leonard Hoftstadter for the last ten years? The man was his best friend, his confidante, and his moral compass. Reaching out, he engulfed his friend in a tight hug, stunning Leonard. Leonard brought his arms around Sheldon's back, hugging him back.

"Thank you, Leonard. I owe you so much. I'm so glad you decided to answer that ad to be my roommate. I…" He broke off, unable to finish. Leonard patted his back.

"I know, buddy. I know. And you're welcome."

They broke apart, both men wiping their eyes discreetly.

Truth be told, Leonard was having a hard time adjusting to everyday life without Sheldon in his home, as well. He was the brother that he missed out on growing up; a pesky, demonstrative, overbearing one, but he meant well. Suddenly his heartfelt words to the late Arthur rang true. Sheldon was a little broken, but so was Leonard. They needed each other. Standing up for him today on his wedding day was the happiest task he could perform for his friend.

"I'd better head out. Don't want to upset your future in-laws, right? Are you going to be alright?" Leonard asked, and Sheldon nodded resolutely.

"Yes, I will be now. Thank you Leonard." He said sincerely.

Leonard walked toward the door, almost reaching the threshold when Sheldon cleared his throat.

"Leonard?"

Turning back, Sheldon smiled at him widely.

"I love you."

Leonard opened his mouth in shock, quickly catching himself.

"I love you too, Sheldon."

The two friends stared at each other in silence and understanding. Everything was changing. Leonard was married, Sheldon was getting married today. Life was moving on. Evolution…

Change was inevitable. For once in their lives, though, these changes were _good_. Very good.

"Amy, wait until Sheldon sees you in that dress! He is going to pass out," Penny gushed, tying the corset a bit tighter while Amy hung on to the bedpost. She grimaced as Penny made a particularly tight pass.

"I _myself_ am going to pass out if you tie that any tighter, bestie." Amy said, her voice strained. Penny eased up, loosening it a tad.

"Oops. Sorry. I got a bit carried away. It just makes your waist look so small and your cleavage so…enhanced. I've always told you to ditch the wool and polyester and show off this body," She marveled, stepping back to assess her handiwork.

Amy snorted, turning her head to the side to meet her friends stare.

"I happen to like that wool and polyester, thank you very much. And stop flirting with me. You had your chance, girlie. Don't be wanting to seduce me now," Amy joked, and Penny glared at her wide eyed before laughing hysterically.

"God, you are terrible. Stop that," Penny scolded, smacking Amy on her shoulder gently.

"I'm just kidding, bestie. I never _really_ wanted you that way. It was just fun to watch your face when I teased you. Besides…it was flattering, right?" Amy tried, smiling gently.

Penny laughed as she thought back to all of Amy's quips. She had to admit, Amy kept it real. "Yes, Ames. My ego was stoked." She joked. "Come on…time to get you into this dress."

Amy turned around, stepping into the skirt and waited as Penny pulled the gown up, securing the plethora of buttons from waist to neckline. Penny fit the last button through its loop, smoothing out the skirt. Amy's veil had been attached to the tiara Sheldon had bought her, and the hairdresser secured it earlier to her lavish up do. Penny turned Amy around to get the full effect, her eyes welling with tears as she took in her best friend. Amy looked perfect. It was really happening - Sheldon and Amy were getting married.

Penny thought back to that first date between them which she attended, and a feeling of pride overcame her at how her two clueless friends finally overcame incredible obstacles to arrive at this day. Penny took Amy's chin in her hands, laughing softly.

"Oh, Amy…you look like a fairy princess. You are literally going to knock Sheldon's socks off. Come take a look. But don't freak out, okay?"

Amy nodded, following Penny to the mirror. She was terrified of what she would see; had she chosen the right dress? Was her hair alright? Was wearing her tiara too much? It was too late to start second guessing herself now. She took a deep breath. Trying to gather her courage, she closed her eyes. Penny maneuvered her just so, her hands on Amy's shoulders.

"Okay, Ames. Open your eyes," Penny whispered. Amy obeyed, staring at herself blankly in the mirror.

"Oh my god…who is that?" She asked in awe. Penny chuckled, wiping a tear as she watched the emotions cross her friends face as she studied herself.

"That is you, Amy. All you. You look stunning. So incredibly beautiful. Sheldon won't know what hit him," She affirmed, moving a stray tendril from Amy's tiara and tucking it behind her veil.

All of her life, Amy had never once considered herself pretty. Passible, maybe. Handsome, in a sturdy sort of way. She had always secretly longed to have legs like Penny, or breasts like Bernadette. But gazing at the reflection in the mirror now, with her gorgeous dress, silky hair, and impeccable makeup, Amy never felt more beautiful. She _did_ look like a goddess. _Sheldon's_ goddess. And that made her glow in a way she never could have imagined.

Amy had to admit she was anticipating Sheldon's reaction to her choice of gown. While still fairly conservative, it boasted a bust line that enhanced her assets and dipped into a tight waist. She knew all too well how much Sheldon loved her curves. She wanted to flaunt them, for him. She turned around, straightening up her spine and smiling a megawatt smile. Penny laughed, knowing there was nothing and nobody that could keep this woman from her man now. But she teased her anyway, just in case.

"So…any last minute fears or concerns? I can have a car here in five minutes if you want to bail," Penny said in jest, nudging Amy with her elbow. Amy smiled serenely, her mood suddenly turning serious.

"Never. I've been waiting for this moment my entire life. Waiting for _him_," Amy murmured, and Penny took her hand and squeezed it gently.

"I know you have, Ames. I know. And nobody deserves this happiness more than you. You are a wonderful, warm and brilliant woman. Being a part of you and Sheldon's love story has been a wonderful adventure. I'm so proud to have you in my life. You've made it better in so many ways. Thank you," Penny said truthfully, her voice cracking. Amy nodded, overcome with emotion.

"Now…let's get you married. Dr. Sheldon Cooper is out there on the beach waiting for you. It's high time he made an honest woman out of you," Penny quipped, turning her friend toward the door.

Amy nodded, feeling more alive than she ever had. She had a fleeting image cross her mind then, of tossing that bottle into the sea a day long ago. She had wished then for happiness. Little had she known what she would receive would be so much deeper. Complete and total bliss. Perhaps dreams really do come true. She was living proof.

"Okay. Let's do this. I'm ready," Amy said, and Penny nodded enthusiastically.

"Good. And besides…Sheldon is probably driving everyone out there crazy. Including the sea gulls," Penny said, earning a hearty chuckle from the Bride.

"Probably. He's a handful, alright. But he's my handful," Amy said, the love in her voice apparent.

Penny smiled sweetly.

"Yes. He most definitely is."

Penny followed Amy as they left the suite, carrying the slight train of her gown.

This was it, Amy thought. Finally, her dreams were coming to fruition. Marrying the man she loved more than life, and embarking on an exciting future together. Could life get any better than this?

She doubted it.

A/N – Thank you for reading. Next chapter: You are cordially invited to the wedding of Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler.


	42. Chapter 42

~Chapter 42~

**A/N- Thank you for sharing this happy occasion with me. I cannot believe that we are here at Sheldon and Amy's wedding day. I hope you enjoy this. I'd like to dedicate this chapter to everyone who has read, reviewed, favorited, liked, or simply glanced at this story. Your friendship and interest has been the driving force behind it. To all Shamy Shippers everywhere, we made it. Tissues? Yes. You will need them. This is a whopper of a chapter; over 18,000 words. It couldn't be helped, though.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.**

**The book of love is long and boring**

**No one can lift the damn thing**

**It's full of charts and facts and figures**

**And instructions for dancing ~ But I, I love it when you read to me**

**And you…**

**You can read me anything**

**The book of love has music in it**

**In fact that's where music comes from**

**Some of it's just transcendental**

**Some of it's just really dumb ~ But I, I love it when you sing to me**

**And you…**

**You can sing me anything**

**The book of love is long and boring**

**And written very long ago**

**It's full of flowers and heart-shaped boxes**

**And things we're all too young to know ~ But I, I love it when you give me things**

**And you…**

**You ought to give me wedding rings **

**And I**

**I love it when you give me things**

**And you…**

**You ought to give me wedding rings**

**You ought to give me wedding rings**

**Peter Gabriel – The Book of Love**

When Sheldon Cooper was a child, he assumed everyone was as intelligent as he was. His disappointment and despair in finding out the stark truth, at the tender age of three, threw his mind into a tailspin.

He feared something was terribly wrong with him. He had the strangest thoughts filtering through his mind; three year olds were not supposed to worry about topics such as protons, particles, and vacuums. His parents didn't make it any better; they took him to one Doctor and Specialist after another, all with the same results. A piteous look, a shake of the head, and a promise of _'he will most likely outgrow it'_.

Outgrow _what_, precisely?

He knew, he was different. After all, not every child could summon any single fact at will, using an eidetic memory. Not every child could recite any tome, any song, spell every single word, or excel in any subject. Not every child could read a passage in a book and in the next breath read it back without looking at it. But, it seemed, most every child _but_ him was liked.

He had no patience for mundane, boring pastimes such as playing football or baseball. Or hanging out at the local pizza parlor with the jocks and cheerleaders. He preferred to be alone, inventing the next space aged gadget. Or solving puzzles and mysteries like a junior detective.

And although he didn't crave human interaction, the question still begged him to differ:

Why did people dislike him so?

Why was _he_ different? Why was_ he_ exceptional? Why could_ he_ solve differential equations at the age of three when his peers had barely mastered the task of potty training? Why did the other children in school bully him, scorn him, ridicule and hate him? He supposed his disdain was apparent, and he rubbed people the wrong way. But that was precisely why he preferred to stay off of other people's radar's, and be left alone.

Still, they sought him out. To tackle him to the floor for standing up in class and giving the right answer. Or playing childish pranks on him for asking the teacher for extra homework. Or allowing their crazy dogs to chase him up trees because he refused to do _their_ homework for them. Rather than pity those peers for their lack of intelligence, he learned to hate them instead.

As the years progressed, he began to feel superior to those around him. Peers his age were ridiculous and childish; fawning over the silliest things. He would sit back and observe them, thanking his lucky stars that he was him, and they were them. He felt blessed and fortunate that his intelligence was so vast. One day very soon, he would be a god amongst men. They would probably no doubt end up in some menial job, hard won with a by-the-skin-of-their-teeth high school diploma.

He longed for the day he could escape his East Texas chains, and see the world. Study with scholars, and win prestigious awards for his immense intellect.

Perhaps it was a conscious decision, perhaps not. Maybe he had no say in the matter anyway. He was who he was. He couldn't change his very essence. And as the gulf between him and the world around him grew, he retreated into himself and decided that the majority of the populous wasn't worth his time.

Who needed a bunch of nonsensical, useless matter clogging up his intellect? Who needed friends; people to distract you from your true purpose of scientific pursuit? Who needed relationships? Those silly notions of happily ever after didn't exist, anyway. There was no such thing as fairytales. Kissing, hugging, hand holding…and those other things. Good Lord…who needed _that_?

He didn't need anyone, or anything. He was an island unto himself. Content and secure.

Happy.

He watched the world around him spin, able to see the inertia closer than most. Time was dragging him forward, in a relentless pursuit of discovery that he was hell bent on attaining. The brass ring was always just out of his reach, though. Each time he allowed an emotion to climb its way to the forefront of his brain, his reasoning would push it backward with a rough shove. There was no place inside the mind of Sheldon Cooper for empathy. Longing. Desire. Or love.

There was only room for cold, hard Science. Facts.

Nothing more.

But in his secret thoughts, the ones he couldn't stop from coming at night in that plane betwixt consciousness and dreams, he felt separate. Isolated. Misunderstood. Alone.

_Lonely…_

And he would remain that way for the next 20 years. Until a chance meeting initiated by two friends, a super computer, and a well-meaning but overbearing mother wielding a George Forman grill intervened.

That day changed his life forever. And not just _this_ life, but the one to come. For if there was an afterlife (which he doubted) or a shot at reincarnation (which was highly unlikely) he knew down to the marrow of his bones that wherever he was, wherever _she_ was…they would inevitably find their way to each other. He doubted the existence of many things. But he would never again doubt _that_.

Amy Farrah Fowler.

She was the absolute love of his life. The rock in which he clung to, the shelter in his storm. She was his everything. She _was_ everything. Sheldon knew without her, the world would go on turning. But his world would crumble like terra cotta baking in the Sun. She was the center of his Universe.

The day he found that bottle on this very beach, he knew something about it was special. The look of it, certainly. It was a beautiful, hand blown antique. Whomever had tossed it into the sea must have grieved its loss, although the sending was obviously intentional. Then there was the typed note inside. Such a poignant, poetic piece of prose. It wasn't your typical _'How do I love thee, let me count the ways'_ variety, but a rare and melancholy poem which spoke of sadness and regret. He pondered why the owner of this bottle had chosen that particular passage to tuck into the bottle. Once he opened the bottle and dared to read its contents, he felt bad for the person who sent it. He hoped, fleetingly, that they had found some happiness. He had found himself experiencing a foreign emotion – empathy.

Sorrow, for the person who sent it, and sorrow for how lonely they must have felt.

To find out, years later, that owner was his very own _girlfriend_…

It still staggered him, months later. And it would continue to stagger him, until the day he drew his last breath.

Sheldon always knew that he was special. But to be hand plucked by Fate itself and be delivered this _deus ex machina _…

He didn't know how or why. And at this point, the reasons no longer mattered. He had wasted enough time being afraid. He was ready now; _more _than ready, to find his place in eternity. His entire life came down to this. Sharing something so profound with Amy; a bond that could never be broken. That was the only certainty he knew. And he would cling to it. Embrace it. Nurture it.

"Sheldon? How are you holding up, Buddy?"

Sheldon looked to his left, meeting Leonard's concerned gaze. He smiled at his friend, letting him know without words that he was fine. Leonard nodded, smiling back, his gaze roaming around the lawn and watching as the guest's mingled and were seated.

The day could not have been more perfect. Warm but pleasant, breezy but not windy. There wasn't a cloud in the sky for miles, and the air smelled of salt and flowers. The resort had done a marvelous job preparing the wedding, down to the smallest detail. Their chosen colors of silver (Amy's favorite, because it was closest to grey) and emerald (Sheldon's favorite, because it reminded him of her magnificent eyes) adorned the ceremony area in the form of bows, candles, and roses dyed the lovely shade of green. The effect was striking against the backdrop of the green grass and the aqua sea in front of them.

Sheldon stood at the front of the arbor with Leonard by his side, anxiously staring toward the pathway that in just moments, Amy would be descending with her father escorting her. He looked around to see their family and friends taking their seats and chatting. His eyes met George Jr.'s, and Sheldon could swear he saw tears in his brother's eyes. He couldn't dwell on that though…not now. He was trying hard to keep his emotions in check, but was failing miserably. He looked over at Charlotte and Joe, and both of them were smiling at him fondly. Joe gave Sheldon a thumbs up, and Sheldon chuckled quietly. They were good people, and as Amy was proud to be joining his family, Sheldon was equally proud to be joining hers.

It was when his eyes met Meemaw's that Sheldon almost lost it. She was crying already, yet smiling widely through her tears. Her gaze didn't waver from Sheldon's, and he knew what she was telling him: She was proud of him. In that moment, he gained strength and courage from her, as well as his father and his pop-pop. He had never felt more of a man than in this moment. From this day onward, he was responsible for another. And one day, when they conceived, he would be responsible for them, as well.

Sheldon didn't know when it had happened, but he had grown up.

The last decade flashed before his vision, warming him and comforting him.

Comic Cons. Comic book nights. Vintage video game nights. Paintball. D&amp;D. Grand Theft Auto. Halo. Thai nights. Chinese nights. Pizza nights. Star Wars weekends…friendship, comradery, secrets, fun. He had found fellowship with a trio of outsiders, just like him. In their own ways each had taught him to be the man he was today.

Raj had given Sheldon the gift of knowing when to romance. He was a tender hearted man who wore his heart on his sleeve. Sheldon admired his kind nature, and valued their numerous discussions on matters of the heart. Howard had given Sheldon the gift of knowing how to surrender. He'd always assumed his engineer friend was of a questionable character. But after marrying Bernadette, and even before as his past sins were held up to the light of day, Sheldon realized just how decent his friend truly was. He had fallen in love, and his sleazy ways had to come to an end. It was heartening to see the metamorphosis that love had caused. And Leonard had given him the gift of hope. His friend had made many mistakes in his relationship with his now wife, but he never gave up hope. He loved Penny purely, since the first day they spied her outside their door.

These three men were perfectly imperfect, and Sheldon wouldn't have it any other way.

His life was about to change, but in the best way possible. He always worried that by letting Amy inside, she would change the man he was. He found that by letting her inside, he _himself_ wanted to change. Because she showed him a glimpse of true happiness, and he wanted to be deserving of it.

Of _her_.

He tried to remain calm by reciting in his mind the entire dialogue to The Empire Strikes Back. Partly because he knew Amy loved it, and partly because it had the best lines. It was no use; all he could focus on was the fact in less than thirty minutes, he would be a married man. Amy Farrah Fowler would become Amy Farrah Cooper. The reality of that hit him with hurricane force strength, and Sheldon's knees buckled gently. Leonard looked over, reaching out a steadying hand to his best friend. Sheldon met Leonard's gaze, and the shorter man offered him a good natured wink. It helped him greatly knowing Leonard was up there with him, supporting him as usual.

The harpist began to play the wedding march, Sarah appearing. She walked slowly down the aisle, throwing rose petals on the lawn before her. Sheldon's face broke out in a radiant smile at the sight. His future niece smiled shyly at him as she approached, giggling when Sheldon winked at her. She looked adorable in her emerald colored dress and for a split second, Sheldon imagined what a young daughter of he and Amy's would look like. The thought made him gulp, but he still managed to keep the smile on his face.

Glenn appeared next with the ring pillow. He smiled proudly at Sheldon as he drew near, and Sheldon was taken aback at the mature gesture from his future nephew. At a loss of what to do, Sheldon winked at him as well. He and the boy had truly bonded last summer in Massachusetts, and he was looking forward to spending time with him again sometime soon. Perhaps building another sandcastle on the beach?

With the children securely by Sheldon and Leonard, Sheldon knew it was time. He waited patiently as Penny appeared from the back of the lawn. She glided down the aisle as agile as a ballet dancer, smiling impossibly wide at first her husband, and then Sheldon. Sheldon managed to keep the smile upon his face, but inside, he was dying to see Amy. He took a deep breath to steady his nerves. Reaching her mark by the front, Penny gave Leonard a wink, her sweet smile turning to a sly smirk as she caught Sheldon's eye. He had no idea what her look of mirth meant, but knowing Penny, it must be something amazing.

And it was.

There was a moment last year when Amy was lying in that hospital bed, where Sheldon would have given his very soul for her to open her eyes and come back to him. The night she did, he had wept for hours, knowing he had been granted a stay of execution. A second chance. A reprieve. His beloved Amy had been returned to him. And he promised himself that he would take care of her for the rest of her life.

At the time, he hadn't quite been ready for matrimony. But he knew, there was no other outcome. Now, as she appeared before him, he knew there would never be another woman to grace this Earth with such beauty.

Had he ever _seen_ true beauty before this moment? No…

_Amy? Will you be my girlfriend…_

_Amy? Will you live with me…_

_Amy? Will you marry me…_

The guests rose to their feet to pay honor to the Bride as she approached. Sheldon heard it all; the murmurs, whispers, tears, and oohs of those dazzled by Amy's splendor. He could only stare at her, rooted to the ground as though if he dared to move, he would tumble into the abyss.

"Oh, God…" Sheldon whispered, a lump the size of a golf ball forming in his throat. She looked absolutely gorgeous. There weren't enough words in the English lexicon to describe how perfect Amy was. Her dress was stunning; showcasing her lovely figure perfectly. His eyes lazily took her in from head to toe, returning to the tiara she wore.

_His_ tiara. The one _he_ gave her. He had fleetingly thought she might wear it today, but he wasn't certain. Tears filled his eyes as he wondered how he could have thought she'd do otherwise.

But it was her face that was absolute perfection. She was glowing as brightly as a candle, pure love and radiance shining out of her eyes. Sheldon gasped, caught in the tractor beam of her precious gaze.

Amy walked toward him, holding tightly to her father's arm. She looked, quite simply…Ethereal. Otherworldly.

Perfect.

"Leonard," Sheldon whispered brokenly, unable to comprehend such a sight.

Leonard smiled warmly, leaning over to whisper in Sheldon's ear discreetly.

"I know, Sheldon. I know. She looks amazing. You're a lucky man. Remember this moment. Remember how you feel," Leonard whispered quietly.

Sheldon could only nod, his entire focus on Amy as she inched closer and closer to him.

Sheldon's heart stopped beating. The Universe stood still as time and space ceased. She was a vision. She looked like a goddess. Dear lord…

'_Remember this moment, Cooper. You remember a million useless and trivial things. Always remember this.'_

The closer Amy came, the deeper his heartbeat thrummed. Suddenly, she was there, a hairs breath away.

With shaking hands, Sheldon reached up tenderly to lift her translucent veil, stepping back to take in his soon to be bride. Her face was a mask of complete serenity, her deep green eyes sparkling. She had forgone her glasses in favor of contacts, and he watched in awe as the gold flecks in her green eyes were magnified by the way the sunlight shining down upon them both lit them from within. Sheldon gulped painfully as a gasp left his mouth in a rush. She was magnificent.

"Dare…" He whispered to himself, quoting Amy's poem. The syllable sounding choked.

Amy smiled at Sheldon, tears mirrored in her eyes. She cocked her head at hearing the strange word come from his mouth, but Sheldon cleared his throat and stepped forward quickly to take her hand from Mr. Fowler's grasp.

"Who gives this woman in marriage to this man?" The Officiant asked, and Mr. Fowler stepped forward.

"Her mother and I do," He said gently, kissing his daughter on the cheek. He took Amy's hand and placed it in Sheldon's before sitting down next to his wife. Mrs. Fowler looked at her daughter and Sheldon, tears trekking down her face. Her baby looked beautiful. And she was so lucky to have such a dashing man as Sheldon.

Amy turned, handing her bouquet to Penny. Her bestie smiled warmly at her, shaking her head in disbelief. Amy looked so wonderful.

"You may be seated," The Officiant addressed the crowd, opening her folder pertaining to the wedding service. "Welcome. It is a truly beautiful day. We are gathered together in the presence of family and friends to witness the joining together of these two lives. These two souls. Sheldon Lee Cooper, and Amy Farrah Fowler. It is love that binds us together in this life, love that guides us through the times of hardship, and love that opens doors which were previously locked to us."

Sheldon stared deeply into Amy's eyes at those words, wishing he could tell her just how true that statement was.

"I have been told that the road which led these two here today, was paved with many hardships - both emotional and physical. It is a testament to the deep, abiding love they share, that Sheldon and Amy have arrived at this point in time together, whole, and ready to merge their two beings into one. For there is no greater endeavor that the human heart can undertake, than to surrender itself to another for safe keeping. It is an act of valor. An act of bravery. And an act of trust."

Amy gazed into the unwavering eyes of her Sheldon, feeling the heavens shining on her.

"Amy and Sheldon have prepared their own vows. Amy, you may go first," The Officiant said gently. Amy nodded, wiping away her stray tears.

_Be brave_, she thought resolutely, taking a deep breath.

"Sheldon…when I was a little girl I dreamt of finding love one day with someone who would take care of me. Accept me. And love me for who I was. I spent my whole life afraid to show the real me. Afraid that I wasn't good enough. Afraid my hopes and dreams would never come to pass. But then…there you were. You have shown me the true meaning of love, Sheldon. You've given me yourself; the good and the bad. You've shared everything. _Your_ hopes and dreams. Wishes and fears. It is my honor to stand here today, and be bound to you. You are everything I could ever ask for in a mate. You are intelligent, kind, strong, handsome, and caring. You entertain me, you amuse me, and you give me pause to ponder the greater mysteries of life. Your intelligence moves me, your compassion sustains me. I was once terrified to be close to another. I once feared that I would always be alone. The day I walked into that coffee shop and saw you standing there, was the day my heart began to beat. I feel like I have loved you my whole life. Perhaps that's because my life didn't begin until the day we met. I trust you more than I trust anyone. I will love you more than I will love anyone. I will be your refuge, when you need a safe place. I will be your warrior, when you need someone to fight for you. I will cherish you, honor you, and give you more love than a man can understand. There will never be a day when I will scorn you. You can place your trust in me, confident that I will guard it. You will be my first and foremost priority. I bring you my heart, that you may protect it. I bring you my soul, that you may nurture it. And I bring you my life, that you may share it. Now and forever," Amy said shakily, yet with absolute certainty.

Sheldon's tears rolled down his face, and he wiped them away hastily. He didn't know how he was going to keep it together. Clearing his throat, he turned his complete focus back to Amy.

"Sheldon," The Officiant encouraged, and Sheldon nodded.

"Amy…" He began shakily, squeezing her hands tighter. Amy bit her lip as she watched him struggle, her heart nearly bursting with love for him. He offered her a watery smile, trying again.

"Amy, I've never believed in miracles. I'm not a religious man. I'm a Scientist. I've never put much faith in anything, save for Science. But in my lifetime, I've witnessed two miracles. The first, was the day that I met you. Thanks to two pushy friends, who knew what I needed more than I did, I walked into a coffee shop to meet a blind date that I had no intention of getting to know. But then…there _you_ were. Staring at me with a mixture of curiosity and aloofness. Something about you touched me deeply. And then…you spoke. And yours was the sweetest voice I had ever heard. Saying the most interesting words I could have ever imagined. There was no way I could leave that shop without your information. The second miracle, was last year. My world nearly came to a grinding halt when I thought I'd lost you. Not once, but twice. If the Universe was trying to tell me something, it was doing a good job. I never want to know what it's like to lose you again. You are a treasure that money could never buy. You are the gold that kings fight for. You are my candle in the window, when I stray too far from the shore and have lost my way. You are my anchor…when the worries of life threaten to send me adrift. You are the beauty that I long for, the loveliness that my soul seeks, and the harbor in which I hide. I was a fool once to fight the love I felt, but I am a fool no more. I am the man who loves you, and who will love you until the heavens fall away and the skies darken. For all of my searches into the realm of extreme possibilities, the only truth I can attest to is that you are the most important thing in my life. I bring you my heart, that you may protect it. I bring you my soul, that you may nurture it. And I bring you my life, that you may share it. Now and forever," Sheldon cried, smiling beatifically at his Amy.

Leonard and Penny wiped away their tears, as did the entire assembly. Sheldon tightened his grip on Amy's hands, squeezing them.

"I love you," He mouthed to her, his tears not ceasing.

"I love you," Amy answered back.

The Officiant gave them a moment to take a breath, smiling at each of them in turn.

"Amy, please repeat after me. I Amy, take you Sheldon, to be my lawfully wedded husband. To have and to hold from this day forward. To comfort in times of sorrow, to aide in times of sickness, to revel with in times of bounty. To love, honor, and cherish all the days of my life."

Amy repeated the benediction, her voice steady and strong. Reaching down, she plucked the ring she had chosen for Sheldon off of Glenn's pillow, smiling at her nephew. He was crying too, so happy for his Aunt.

"Sheldon, with this ring, I thee wed."

Amy slid the ring home on Sheldon's finger, holding his hand and gazing at it with rapt eyes.

Sheldon looked down at the ring upon his finger, feeling faint. It looked so wonderfully right sitting there. He truly belonged to her now. As much as she belonged to him.

"Sheldon, please repeat after me. I Sheldon, take you Amy, to be my lawfully wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward. To comfort in times of sorrow, to aide in times of sickness, to revel with in times of bounty. To love, honor, and cherish all the days of my life."

Sheldon followed with his own benediction, leaning down to remove Amy's wedding band. He too smiled at Glenn.

"Amy…with this ring, I thee wed."

He slid the ring into place, marveling at how perfect it looked alongside Meemaw's.

"Oh," Sheldon sighed as he gazed at her hand. His eyes met Amy's and they both felt their sizzling connection cemented.

"It is with the giving and receiving of a ring and the desire to stand before witnesses and profess their love that these two people are joined in matrimony. Sheldon and Amy, from this day forth you are no longer two, but one. It is by your own wishes that your lives are bound together today. We here share your joy as we send you off with love. With the power granted to me by the great state of Texas, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Sheldon, you may kiss your bride."

Sheldon could barely breathe as he gazed at Amy, her eyes sparkling like they emeralds they resembled.

"Amy…" Sheldon whispered softly, pulling her tightly to him and kissing her as though his very life depended upon it.

Pulling apart to a frenzy of applause, whistles, and happy shouts, Amy grinned serenely at her handsome husband. He mirrored her smile, the pair of them in their own little world.

"Ladies and Gentleman, I am honored to be the first to present to you…Mr. and Mrs. Sheldon Lee Cooper."

Sheldon took Amy's hand gently, guiding her slowly down the aisle. Their family and friends cheered and clapped as they made their way to the back.

As days went, this one was absolute perfection. Sheldon took his wife in his arms, spinning her around happily.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Sheldon sat back, observing his wife as their girlfriends fawned over her. Penny had never looked at Amy quite the way she was now, and Bernadette couldn't stop crying. Penny stroked Amy's cheek, no doubt wiping away another tear of the day, while Bernadette touched Amy's gown reverently. They were probably teasing her about the wedding night, a thought that had Sheldon himself blushing. It warmed Sheldon's heart to know that these women loved his girl so much.

He thought back to the time they had excluded her from dress shopping for Bernadette's wedding, and how he had to comfort her.

At the time, he felt like he had been forced to do it, annoyed at the prospect. It wasn't until they actually cuddled, that he knew he was in trouble. What began as an obligatory gesture to comfort a friend, morphed into something he was frightened to give a name to.

Yet sitting there on Amy's sofa with his arms wrapped around her, and her head on his chest…felt surprisingly good. It felt right. There was no feelings of discomfort, or fear of germs. There was no thought to how it looked, or what the outcome would be. Amy needed him, plain and simple. He had been so worried about her when all attempts to contact her had been unsuccessful. That alone should have tipped him off that his feelings towards her were, indeed, changing.

Looking across the room at her now, dressed in a breathtaking wedding gown and her eyes alight with joy, he chastised himself for the millionth time that he waited so long to declare his feelings.

A loud voice cleared itself behind him, and he turned his attention away from his wife to find himself face to face with his older brother. George smiled fondly at him, shaking his head in an incredulous manner. Sheldon tilted his head, realizing George needed to say something. He waited patiently, raising a well arched brow.

"You looked so grown up standing up there today, Shelly. Daddy would be proud of you. Pop-Pop, too. I wish you and that little girl all the best. You deserve it, Sheldon." George said kindly, patting him on the shoulder.

Sheldon was speechless. He didn't recall his brother ever saying such a thing to him.

"Thank you, Jr." He managed, unable to say anymore.

George sensed his brother's struggle, and he sighed heavily.

"This isn't easy, is it? We haven't exactly had the warmest relationship. I'm partly to blame, I admit. I'm sorry about that." George said remorsefully. Sheldon glanced over to his wife before turning his attention back to his brother.

"Did you really…dislike me so much? Was I really that much of an embarrassment to you?" Sheldon asked quietly.

George's eyes widened at his brother's assumptions.

"Sheldon…when you were a kid, I wasn't embarrassed by you. I was _threatened _by you. You were so damn…smart. I had never known anyone like you before, and the fact you were my kid brother, well…it made me feel weird. I know I treated you badly, and hurt your feelings a lot. I was just trying to come to terms with my own feelings of not measuring up. Looking back, I feel terrible for the way I treated you. To see you now, a man grown, and to know what you've accomplished and who you turned out to be…it makes me so proud to call you my brother. I know that I did a terrible job being there for you. But I would really like us to be friends now, if you could find it in your heart to forgive me." He said sincerely.

Sheldon stood still, his eyes unable to blink as George's words sunk in. His brother sounded more sincere than he'd ever heard him. Sheldon wasn't accustomed to such warmth from his Texan hulk of a brother, and for a moment, he didn't know what to say. But as George's eyes beseeched his, Sheldon felt his resistance falter.

_His eyes are just like daddy's_, Sheldon mused. Big and brown, and deep as the Texas night sky. He gulped as he remembered how he felt whenever his father turned his eyes upon his in a praising manner. He missed his father, more than he'd ever admit. His time with him was too short. It was too late to make amends with him, but perhaps, it wasn't too late to make amends with his brother.

Sheldon thrust his hand forward, waiting with baited breath as George slowly gripped it.

"I would like that, George. I forgive you. You were a child, and didn't yet have the capacity to understand. I know I was overbearing, and I ridiculed your intellect a lot. I think…we both have demons in our past we would like to forget. I propose we start over." Sheldon said, amazing his brother once again when in mid handshake, he threw an arm around him and hugged him.

Whatever his new sister-in-law did to Sheldon, it was alright in George's book. He was actually…human now. He was so different than the Sheldon who left home at 14. He never thought he would be able to enjoy his brother's company. He hugged Sheldon back tightly, not caring who witnessed it.

Across the room, Mary watched her two sons embracing, and looked up to the heavens with tears in her eyes. Meemaw patted her daughter's back gently as she too witnessed the tender exchange.

"Now that's a lovely sight to behold. After almost 35 years, to see those two on good terms…" Clara trailed off, smiling serenely. Mary agreed, nodding.

"You know what I'm gonna say, Mama." Mary warned, and Clara rolled her eyes.

"Yes, Dear. I know. But the good Lord isn't the only one to thank for this. Look at your boy, Mary. Look what he's accomplished in the last five years. He's grown by leaps and bounds. All because of the love he feels for Amy. She's so good for him. And he's good for her. You should be so proud of him. I know I am," Clara said, the pride in her voice strong and firm.

Mary smiled at her mother.

"Yes, Mama. I am proud of him. You know I worried about him so much. I'm just relieved to know he has someone to love him. And that girl is no dummy. She'll keep my Shelly on his toes," Mary chuckled.

"Something tells me, she certainly will," Clara murmured, as she watched Sheldon leave his brother and walk over to where Amy stood. He pried her away from her friends, whispering something in her ear that made her smile shyly. "Oh yes. Most definitely."

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

"I cannot believe you did that! When did you even get a chance to rehearse this?" Penny gushed as her husband came back to the table, out of breath and panting. Leonard grinned at his wife, stealing a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Howard organized it. We skyped back and forth. We all knew the words, anyway. What do you think I was doing all those nights you were on the stage?" Leonard asked, chuckling. Penny shook her head, laughing heartily.

Leonard, Howard, and Raj had surprised Amy with a rousing rendition of '_She Blinded Me with Science.'_ When they each took microphones, heading up to where the band was stationed, Sheldon hadn't any idea what to expect. But as soon as the song began to play, Sheldon's face broke out in a delighted grin.

"Oh, my…they _are _crazy," Sheldon said fondly, shaking his head at his friend's antics. Amy was awed by the sweet and funny gesture, flattered that they had chosen a song that not only quantified her and Sheldon's relationship perfectly, but put Amy herself in the role of temptress. The thought made her smile, and she turned her beaming face toward her husband in complete joy.

"Did you know about this?" She asked him, and Sheldon shook his head rapidly.

"No. They never said a thing," He admitted, feeling so grateful that these men thought of everything to make their day special. They were oddballs, the lot of them. But Sheldon was, too.

Sheldon and Amy sat holding hands, laughing at the way they perfectly choreographed the number. When it was finished, the three men bowed to Amy, and she blew them each a kiss.

"Thank you, guys. That was something else." She said, her voice full of happiness.

Sheldon turned to his wife, loving the way she looked so incredibly happy.

"May I have this dance, Mrs. Cooper?" Sheldon asked tenderly.

Amy took his hand, allowing him to lead her to the dancefloor.

"Of course, Sheldon." She answered, feeling like she was walking on air.

They stood there, everyone else sitting down, and Sheldon smiled at his wife gently.

"Ladies and Gentleman, the bride and groom will now share their first dance as husband and wife." The MC said, and as soon as the violin struck its first note, Amy gulped as tears filled her eyes.

"Oh, Sheldon…you remembered," She whispered, laying her head upon Sheldon's shoulder.

Sheldon ran his palm down her back gently, loving the silky feel of her bare skin. He was going to do everything in his power to make her happy. Starting with this.

"Of course I remembered. I remember everything," He pointed out, nuzzling her neck as one of the singers came up to the front to join in. Amy stared at her in amazement as she began to sing her absolute favorite song.

_Someday, when I'm awfully low. When the world seems cold. I will get a glow just thinking of you…and the way you look tonight._

_Yes, you're lovely, with your smile so warm. And your cheeks so soft. There is nothing for me but to love you. And the way you look tonight._

_With each word your tenderness grows. Tearin' my fear apart. And that laugh..wrinkles your nose, Touches my foolish heart._

_Lovely ... Never, never change. Keep that breathless charm. Won't you please arrange it? 'Cause I love you. Just the way you look tonight. Mmm, just the way you look…tonight._

As the song came to a close, Sheldon dipped Amy low, thrilled how well in sync they were as he slowly and carefully raised her up. Their eyes met, each mirroring the others.

"And that's how it's done," Sheldon whispered in her ear cockily, making Amy laugh loudly and throw her arms around her husband's neck. She kissed him soundly. And he kissed her back with equal fervor.

"Ladies and Gentleman, the best man would like to say a few words at this time," The MC announced. Sheldon and Amy broke apart, strolling hand in hand back to their table amidst applause. They sat down as Leonard took the stage, gathering his thoughts for a moment. When his eyes met Sheldon's, he smiled warmly at his best friend.

"Eleven years ago, I met a person that would change my life. A friend, a brother, a confidante. We have shared so many times together. Good, bad, fun, sad…as friends, colleagues, and roommates. I want to tell you all a few things about this couple, in case you never knew. Many of you know Sheldon to be articulate, fussy, and a perfectionist. But did you also know he could be extremely generous? Monumentally supportive? And most importantly, honest to a fault. I've never known a man that can infuriate me in one moment, and cheer me up in the next. Sheldon Cooper is a paradox. That perfect blend of friend and foe. I am more than proud to call him brother, as well as friend. He is the finest man I've ever known. Certainly, the most intelligent. He is a good man. A decent man. A man, who is flawed. But nevertheless, he rose above those flaws, to embrace this most perfect love. The love of a woman worthy to be loved."

Leonard turned his eyes toward Amy, spying tears glistening there. He smiled at her warmly.

"Amy, when you first joined our ragtag group of outcasts, we weren't prepared for you. Your honestly, candor, and friendship moved us all in different ways. At first, it was a bit intimidating. You were clearly intelligent, and we all knew immediately that Sheldon had met his match. As time passed, you blended in seamlessly. Your warmth, generosity, and kindness has not only moved Sheldon, but us as well. I think I speak for us all; Penny, Raj, Howard, Bernadette and myself…when I say welcome to the family. You have been a part of our lives now for a while. But as we consider Sheldon a brother, we now consider you our sister. I would like to lift a glass, in toast to you both. To Sheldon and Amy. It was a long and hard road you traveled to arrive here, but well worth the distance. May you have a long and happy life together. May you never know hardship, or adversity, or struggle. May you gather together, trusting each other and clinging to each other to see you through any trial. And may you always love each other with as much passion and purity as you do at this moment. Being a part of your love story has been a wonderful experience. Congratulations."

There wasn't a dry eye in the room as Sheldon and Amy both stood, walking to Leonard and embracing him tightly. First Amy, who was happily startled as Leonard kissed her cheek gently, and then Sheldon, who hugged his best friend tightly.

"You are the best friend I've ever had, Leonard. Thank you," Sheldon whispered quietly, and Leonard patted his friends back.

"And you're mine, buddy. Congratulations. And good luck." He said warmly.

The two men broke apart, both wiping tears. Penny came over, hugging her two friends in congratulations. She patted Sheldon on the head like his mother would, so proud of her friend for all he's accomplished. She remembered first laying eyes on Sheldon Cooper. Who knew, that it would only take the love of this woman to change him from that man, to this one.

Penny and Amy's eyes met, each thinking the same thing. It was these men that brought them together, but it was their mutual respect and like of the other that made their friendship blossom. Penny smiled wistfully at her friend, never feeling closer to her than in that moment.

"Besties," Penny whispered, and Amy smiled through her tears.

"Besties," Amy affirmed, nodding.

Amy doubted anything could make her happier than how she felt right now.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

It was nearly 7 pm by the time the festivities died down. After a delicious lunch, which gave way to serious dancing, the guests knew the party was winding down.

They had cut into their perfect wedding cake, feeding each other happily. Amy had surprised Sheldon with not only a sundae bar, but a groom's cake in the theme of superheroes. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head when he saw it, hugging Amy so tightly that she could hardly draw a breath.

He had asked the wedding coordinator to make sure there was a chocolate fountain at the reception. He knew his little lady's love of the confection, and the sight of the molten river of chocolate made Amy's face break out in an ear splitting grin.

They kept with tradition, tossing the bouquet as well as the garter belt. Sheldon blushed madly as he pulled the belt down Amy's leg, before tossing it into the crowd.

It was time for the couple to bid adieu to their family, as George left with Mary and Clara. Missy, Noah and Ray followed. As they piled into George's SUV, Sheldon waved to his family, catching Meemaw's happy gaze. She waved to her grandson, putting her hand over her heart in a gesture that told Sheldon she loved him. Sheldon mimicked the gesture.

Next was Mr. and Mrs. Fowler. They kissed their daughter lovingly, before hugging Sheldon.

"Please take care of my baby," Mrs. Fowler said, ruffling Sheldon's hair. He smiled gently as his new mother-in-law.

"Always." He vowed softly.

Charlotte and Joe were next.

"Well, kiddos…I guess it's that time. You were both beautiful today. I know you will have a wonderful marriage." Charlotte gushed, kissing Amy on the head softly. Joe shook Sheldon's hand.

Sarah and Glenn each took turns hugging their Aunt and their new Uncle. Sheldon lowered to his knees to pick Sarah up. The move made her giggle loudly as Sheldon gently swung her around.

"So…tomorrow we will spend some time with you before we leave for New York. How does building the biggest sandcastle in the history of man sound?" Sheldon asked Glenn, smiling when the boy's eyes lit up.

"Really? Wow. That sounds great, Uncle Sheldon."

Amy smiled at the exchange, noting how Sheldon's eyes twinkled at the salutation.

"Okay, then. It's a date. Get some rest; I want my helpers to be in tip top shape for tomorrow."

They hugged each of their friends in turn, thanking them for being there for them today. Leonard took Sheldon aside, his signature wide grin adorning his face. Sheldon raised his eyes in question.

"Now, I know you're nervous, but it will be fine tonight. Just…take it slow." Leonard advised his friend. Sheldon looked on in confusion.

"Um…Leonard? I _have_ done this before," He pointed out, puffing out his chest in pride. Leonard nodded, pursing his lips.

"Yeah. I know. But…never as a _husband_, Sheldon. It's different. Trust me." Leonard said sincerely.

A look of understanding passed between the two friends, and Sheldon nodded seriously.

"Thank you, Leonard. For everything." He whispered.

"You're welcome, Sheldon." Leonard managed, patting his friend on the back.

The group padded off to their rooms, leaving their friends with their well wishes.

Suddenly, the empty garden seemed magical, as husband and wife turned to face each other.

"And then, there were two." Sheldon murmured, taking Amy's hand in his own. Amy nodded, smiling softly at her husband.

They made their way back to the resort, riding up the elevator to the third floor in silent contemplation. A million thoughts swirled through the couples' heads, and each was carried away to the night ahead. Their eyes were locked on to one another's as the floor's ascended, each refusing to look away.

Amy couldn't believe they were really married, evidenced by the way her eyes kept straying to the diamond ring on her finger. It looked breathtaking adjacent to Meemaw's ring, matching it beautifully.

Sheldon felt the same way; his head not fully wrapped around the fact he was a husband now. Amy was his wife. They were pair bonded in the eyes of the law, and in the eyes of a Deity he was still uncertain existed. Each time he looked at the onyx and rose gold band upon his finger, his heart accelerated. He had never felt so…mature. He blushed realizing he enjoyed this feeling. He enjoyed it a lot.

The doors opened with an elegant swoosh, and Sheldon ushered Amy forward with a gentle hand on her lower back, Amy keeping pace next to Sheldon as she gathered the train of her gown in her hand.

The plan was to spend two days here at the resort before flying to New York for their honeymoon. Amy had always wanted to see Niagara Falls, and when Sheldon suggested it, she had been thrilled. They were going to rent a car and drive over the border to see the falls from the Toronto side.

But the honeymoon was the furthest thing from her mind at the moment. Amy could not wait to get Sheldon alone. The couple arrived at their suite for the next two nights, and Sheldon took a deep breath as he reached into his pocket for their room card.

_Their room_.

So much had happened since Sheldon first uttered those life changing words the night of their prom. Growth, joy, and yes…even a little heartache. Nothing mattered now, though, as the two stood before their family and friends today, sealing their fates together and promising each other nothing but eternity. They were not a normal couple. They never were, and never would be. They were unconventional. Quirky. Different.

Perfect, they would each agree.

Slipping the card key into the lock, Sheldon's breath halted as the green light appeared giving them the all clear to enter. This was it, he thought shakily. Re- pocketing the key, he turned to Amy who was staring up at him with a serene smile. He cleared his throat as he took a step closer to her.

"Social convention dictates that I carry you over the threshold. But if you are not open to that, I understand. What is your wish?" He asked, his cobalt eyes boring into hers. The smile on her face a moment ago faltered. She realized suddenly that this was becoming very real, very fast.

_He is my husband now._

A thought occurred to her, warming her from the inside out.

"Would you _like_ to carry me over the threshold, Sheldon?" She asked gently, her heart in her throat. Sheldon broke his gaze to sweep his eyes up and down his bride's form. He made a gesture that Amy recognized quite well; he gulped. Her feminine pride gave her a nudge in the shoulder.

"Yes. Very much so," He whispered, already mentally working out the logistics to lift her as to keep her gown from tearing. When a beautiful smile broke out on her face, Sheldon smiled too.

"Then yes, I would like that. I won't be too heavy? This gown weighs at least fifteen pounds," She joked nervously, but Sheldon merely smiled.

"It will be fine, Mrs. Cooper," He said, the title slipping out effortlessly. Amy's eyes widened and Sheldon nearly lost his footing. Good Lord, but that sounded…undeniably right.

Sheldon pushed the door and grabbed a chair by the entrance to prop it open. He turned back to his wife, closing the gap between them and stepping back out into the hallway.

"Lift up your train as high as you can," He whispered, his eyes sliding down to view her efforts. When the pale skin of Amy's legs came into view, he licked his lips nervously. Amy did the same.

"Now put your arm around my shoulder, and bend your knees."

Amy obeyed, and Sheldon bent his knees to slide one arm around her back, the other under her knees. The feeling of her leaving terra firma and being raised into his arms was like nothing she'd ever felt before. A loud H_oo _escaped her lips as Sheldon fitted her comfortably against his chest.

While she often wondered if Sheldon possessed upper body strength and knew that his height was a definite plus, she never expected him to be so strong. He didn't even look winded as he slowly walked them across the doorway, taking his time to savor this moment that would only come once. He even stopped just inside, simply standing there holding her aloft. His eyes met hers, and what she saw in them had her trembling.

"Sheldon?" She questioned shakily, the palm resting against his back sliding around to his cheek. He blinked at her lazily.

"You're my wife now," He murmured, his voice sounding awed. "We're _married_."

Amy smiled, rubbing his cheek tenderly with her thumb. He would always be Sheldon; teetering on the edge of being either sarcastic or childlike. She'd grown to love those parts of her brilliant husband, as well.

"Yes Sheldon. I know. I was there," She answered sweetly, looking up at him in adoration. Sheldon continued staring at her another moment before walking further into the suite and depositing her down gently on the bed. He went to close the door, putting the do not disturb sign over the knob before stepping back inside. He joined her by the bed, staring down at her without speaking. Amy stared up at him expectantly, giving him time. He took a very deep breath, his eyes not leaving hers.

"This is even more binding then the relationship agreement, you know. You can't ever…I mean, this is forever," He whispered, staring at her with a mixture of fear and wonder. Amy pushed her veil behind her to better see her handsome husband.

"It _is_ forever. And I'll take nothing less. But…I'll let you in on a little secret, Dr. Cooper…That relationship agreement? It was _always _unnecessary. We didn't need it, because…I wasn't going anywhere. Ever. You had me from the words 'Hello Amy Farrah Fowler'." She said truthfully.

Sheldon was never one for romantic displays. He hated public displays of affection, hated how people were always pawing at each other, and hated feeling obligated to do such things. In the beginning of their courtship, Sheldon lived in fear of if and when Amy would demand such interactions. Yet today, as he watched his now wedded wife…he found himself wanting nothing more than to get her alone and just touch her.

Was that the magic denominator? Did slipping a ring on Amy's finger and promising to love, honor, and cherish her in front of fifty people turn him from a child into a man?

Sheldon couldn't be certain. He was still very much a novice in this whole romance department. But he knew one basic certainty: Amy Farrah Fowler was his life now.

Their courtship had been fraught with pitfalls. Mostly thrown in their course by Sheldon himself. Yet never had Amy's love and faith in him wavered. She had been nothing but patient, nothing but understanding. Any other woman would have cut bait eons ago. And perhaps, that wouldn't have mattered to him. But Amy was different. Amy was…everything.

After becoming engaged, he swore to himself he would give her more. More affection, more trust, more love. He never realized how much he desired to make her happy, until she accepted his proposal.

Now, as he gazed at his beautiful bride across a lavish honeymoon suite, he could have sworn he was getting a glimpse of what Heaven would look like. If it existed, of course.

"I love you, Amy." He said with a steady voice. Amy smiled gently at the man who had stolen her heart.

"I love you too, Sheldon." She affirmed, their eyes locked together.

And just like that, everything was right.

Sheldon removed his jacket slowly, draping it across a chair. Next came the vest, which he unbuttoned slowly as his eyes steadily burned into Amy's. His tie followed.

All the while Amy stared at him, unblinking. He reveled in how her breathing pattern changed; first from steady and quiet to choppy and loud. He smiled a sexy grin when he realized what he was doing to her. Amy had reached her limit, and she sat up straight on the bed, beckoning Sheldon with a crooked finger.

"Come here," She whispered, and Sheldon obeyed. He walked to her slowly, prolonging her torture.

"Yes?" He asked innocently, raising a perfect brow at his wife. While sweet and playful, the gesture inflamed her. She wanted her husband naked. And she wanted him naked now.

Without a word in reply, Amy stood up and began to unbutton Sheldon's shirt. They kept their eyes glued to one another as she lowered each one, sliding her warm hands inside the waistband of his trousers to release the bottom of the shirt. Once released, she pulled the shirt off of him, wasting no time in grabbing the bottom of his white cotton undershirt and whipping it off in a move The Flash would have been proud of.

Sheldon stood there, stunned, his eyes unfocused as Amy admired his mussed hair and pink cheeks. That wasn't all she admired, as her heavy gaze swung lower and took in his beautiful chest and abs. She reached out a trembling hand, touching one pec and trailing it lower as she followed the slight treasure trail on his abs.

"Allow me to tell you how handsome you looked today. It was all I could do to not kiss you senseless. You are so beautiful, Sheldon. And you belong to me now. Completely," She said sweetly, leaning over to kiss his neck.

Sheldon closed his eyes tightly, his mouth suddenly going dry.

"Amy…" He whispered, and it was the most beautiful sounding syllable she had ever heard. The love, reverence, and desire in that one word make her whole body tremble.

"Yes?" She whispered in reply, not willing to be distracted from her task of undressing her husband. She ran her hands along his waist, following the belt until she reached the buckle. Unbuckling it deftly, she pulled it free of its loopy prison, dropping it on the floor carelessly.

Sheldon could care less where it landed as Amy then unsnapped his trousers, the zipper lowering in the quiet night sounding provocative and sexy. Amy knew what she was doing to her man; his breath was out of control already, and his flesh was straining against the fabric she had just lowered. When he toed off his shoes and pulled the trousers off completely, standing there in nothing but his briefs, Amy knew he was more than ready for her touch.

Stepping up closer to Sheldon, Amy reached down and cupped him through his briefs as she simultaneously kissed his chest.

"I've dreamt of this moment all week, Sheldon. I just want to touch you. Everywhere," She groaned, taking one of his masculine nipples in her mouth and sucking gently. The sensation startled Sheldon, who reached out and grabbed her backside roughly to steady himself.

"Oh…" Sheldon moaned, the double assault nearly rendering him to his knees. "Finally."

Amy delighted in his moans and whimpers, feeling powerful and beautiful. She kissed a path down his chest, loving how his stomach quivered at her touch. All the while, her fingers caressed his manhood, making him pant with want. One hand slid around to the back, loving the firm flesh there. Reaching inside the front, she drew her hand across his silken, hard length, releasing a moan herself at how good he felt.

All at once, she ceased her ministrations, coming back to her full height to face him. Sheldon swallowed thickly, aroused beyond belief.

His little Vixen. Making him crazy and then just stopping. But she didn't look like a Vixen now. She wasn't smiling. Wasn't grinning. Wasn't giving him a sly look. No. His little Vixen had been replaced with his little lump of wool. Sweet. Gentle. Shy. Beautiful.

She was staring at him with big, wide eyes full of love and longing. His adoration for her grew exponentially. It was _his_ turn to pleasure _her_. And oh…he would.

Gathering his wits, he took her hands in his own.

"Would you like to take a bath?" He questioned, his voice trembling. Amy recognized that voice. It was Sheldon's '_I'm aroused but trying to restrain myself'_ voice. A delicious zing raced up her spine.

"Will you be joining me?" She asked quietly, lowering her lashes. Where this shyness was coming from, he had no idea. But he absolutely loved it. Sheldon gulped as his mind formed delicious scenarios.

"Would you like that?" He asked, his eyes searing through her like a laser. Amy could do no more than nod.

Sensing her impatience, Sheldon stepped closer to her and traced her collarbones with his fingertips.

"I would love to join you, but the bath can wait. I want to undress _you_, now." He said, his deep voice caressing her as sensually as his hands were.

Amy gasped quietly at the desire in her husband's voice. Had it really only been a week? It seemed like forever. No…it seemed like this was the very first time. Everything seemed new, exciting, and scary. The exhilaration flowing through her made her feel more alive than ever.

"What a coincidence, Dr. Cooper. You read my mind. I want you to undress me, too." She whispered, her voice trembling.

Sheldon's eyes widened. The way she was looking at him made his heart race faster.

"Yeah?" He asked her huskily.

Amy nodded shyly.

"Of course I do, Sheldon. I hope you like the present as much as the wrapping," She said tenderly, and Sheldon swallowed painfully. He reached out, smoothing a tendril of her hair away from her face with gentle fingers.

"Oh…I've no doubt about that," He murmured. "No doubt at all. In fact…the odds are very much in favor I will _love_ the present. May I?" He asked her respectively, and Amy nodded her approval.

"Turn around," He whispered in her ear, trailing his lips down her neck. Amy shivered. She smelled like roses today. He inhaled deeply, allowing the scent to infiltrate his memory banks.

He undid each button of her gown with the utmost care, mindful of how delicate it was. Pulling it off her pale shoulders and down her body, he carefully laid it over the chair his suit resided. The sight that greeted him from the back made all of the blood leave his brain.

"Amy…" He breathed out, his voice sounding awed. It was Amy's turn to gulp now under his scrutiny.

She had on a high cut pair of white satin panties with a garter belt and stays. Her beautiful posterior begged to be touched, and he couldn't wait to do so.

"Oh…Amy. I don't…I don't know what to say," He said, his voice hitching in his throat. He could barely breathe as it was. When Amy turned around, Sheldon nearly passed out.

She was wearing a white satin corset that was quite simply breathtaking on her. Her breasts were lifted in the most provocative manner by the bustier, her nipples now slightly visible over the shelf. Was she trying to kill him with this getup, he wondered? If he had known that this was beneath the lace dress she wore, he would never have made it through the ceremony.

Sheldon's eyes took her in greedily, and he was certain he had not and will never see anything as beautiful as Amy was now. He bit his lip, not sure what he wanted to do first – kiss her lovely mouth or unwrap this most precious gift.

"You look…ravishing," He said with feeling, his big warm hands stroking down her sides lovingly. The bustier had tiny laces, and his fingers trembled as he attempted to undo them. His hands itched to touch every single inch of her. Stroking back upward, his fingers traversed the curves of her cleavage and he felt his groin tighten further. Amy moaned as her head lolled back against Sheldon's shoulder. His fingers found her nipples through the boning, and he began to stroke them delicately.

"Oh, my…this is the most erotic thing I've ever seen," He murmured, spellbound by her full and feminine breasts. He had to take a deep breath at the rapturous desire that was mounting within him. He lowered dilated pupils to look down upon his handy work over her shoulder, taking in her luscious body. She was not a size six and probably never would be. But she was the most sensuous, beautiful, and feminine woman he would ever know. That fact she belonged to him made him prouder than a king.

"Where did you…get this?" He asked, his voice sounding deep and husky. She was like every secret fantasy he'd ever had rolled into one. Hot arousal shot through his body as he noted her flesh responding to his words, as well as his touch. He stroked lower, allowing his fingers to enjoy her as he cupped her breasts completely.

"Penny and Bernadette helped me pick out my wedding trousseau. Is it too much?" She asked apprehensively, fearing Sheldon thought she looked ridiculous.

Her worries were unfounded, as Sheldon was practically panting at the sight of her.

"Too much? Dear Lord…yes. It is. Thank you," He whispered, shocking Amy and himself with how _much_ he liked it. To think Sheldon Lee Cooper was standing here, ogling a woman in her underwear…

But this wasn't just any woman. And she wasn't wearing just any underwear. She looked like Aphrodite, come down from Mount Olympus.

Pulling Amy closer to him, he kissed her hungrily from the side. Her mouth was like a treasure and he savored every nuance of her. He trailed his lips down her neck, turning around and kissing her neck from behind. Amy melted into his touch. He leaned her back against him, sliding his hands down her shoulders. His palms brushed against her breasts as the corset fell away, and Amy moaned.

Sheldon lowered to his haunches, kissing her waist and hips before hooking his fingers inside her panties.

"Sheldon," Amy whispered as he began to slide her panties down her legs, the silk material teasing her skin. He kissed her lower back as he tended to his task, unwrapping his gift. And she _was_ a gift. His mouth followed his fingers to her soft flesh, his breath leaving him in a whoosh as he took her in.

"This is new," He whispered in awe, noticing that she must have been to the spa recently.

"I…um…had it done. Yesterday, when I went with the girls to the Spa. For…you," She stammered, biting her lip as she watched Sheldon's reaction. His fingers brushed against her, finding her smooth and wet. Amy gasped as his fingers made contact with her over sensitized flesh.

"Ah…" She keened, the sensation unbearable. Sheldon could only gape at her, wide eyed.

"Jesus," He uttered at how sexy she looked. _Felt._ "Are you _trying_ to give me a heart attack, Amy?" He groaned, tearing his gaze away from her body to stare up at her with smoldering eyes. The way his eyes devoured her made her suddenly bold. She smiled coyly, running her hand through his hair tenderly.

"Oh, no…I wouldn't want to become a widow on my wedding night," Amy joked huskily, her laughter turning to moans when Sheldon kissed her hip tenderly. His mouth trailed lower until he reached her bikini line. He pulled back to gaze upon her hungrily.

"You are too beautiful for words." He said reverently. Amy gulped as he touched her again, softly, trailing his long fingers through her womanly folds with gentleness and sensuality. She felt _fantastic_. He had never thought of anyone doing that…there. He'd heard about it, though. He wasn't stupid. And it never mattered to him one way or the other. He loved Amy. All of her. But he couldn't lie and say this new aspect didn't add a certain sex appeal. As he caressed her, he could easily feel her arousal growing. Her wetness increased, and she had to hold his shoulders to keep upright once he added his mouth into the mix.

"Sheldon…please." She begged, and her tone of voice was like cold water thrown on him. He wanted her to reach her pinnacle. Of course he did. But he was selfish. He wanted her to wait, to reach it with him. _Together_.

Rising unsteadily, he gazed down at her with rapt eyes. She looked resplendent.

"Not yet. I still have some unwrapping to do," He murmured, unhooking her garter belt and rolling down the thigh highs carefully. Amy stepped out of her shoes, kicking them aside.

All that was left was the tulle of her veil, clipped carefully into her tiara. Sheldon deftly removed the tulle, placing it gently on the bench at the end of the bed. She was naked before him now in only the two pieces of jewelry he bought her, and his grandmother's ring. His mouth went dry and his heart began to beat a rhythm out of his chest. She looked breathtakingly beautiful. He gathered her into his arms, moaning at the sensation of skin to skin contact. Amy went without any protest, and she shivered as his wet lips made contact with her ear.

"The tiara stays on," He whispered huskily, prompting a moan from his wife. He pulled back, his hungry gaze sweeping her body. He released the pins in her long hair, allowing it to fall around her in a thick, wavy halo. For a fleeting moment, she reminded him of Wonder Woman. The idea made him smile. Wonder Woman _was_ a princess, after all.

"This is how I want to remember you on our wedding night - naked, beautiful, and wearing nothing but my rings and my tiara. You are my princess, Amy. _Mine_."

The possessive tone of his voice and his desperate words had Amy knees weakening. She wasn't one to swoon, but she feared she was going to pass out from the lack of oxygen to her brain. Sheldon circled her, cataloguing every feature of hers to his eidetic memory. The way her breasts were round and capped with delectable pink nipples. The flatness of her tummy flaring out into wider hips that had always captivated him. As did her plush posterior that begged for his hands. Everything about her screamed woman. All woman. _His_ woman.

He touched his wife, showing her with hands and lips how much he loved her. His desire ratcheting up higher as her obvious arousal overwhelmed them both. Sheldon never felt so out of control with lust and love; he had waited his entire life to feel like this, without even knowing it. His wife was naked and giving in his arms. He was completely dumbstruck with the depth of emotions coursing through him.

He wouldn't trade this feeling for a hundred Nobel's. It was precious. All encompassing. Perfect.

"Sheldon…I need you," She begged, her voice pleading for something he had never heard from her before. Whatever it was, he would give it to her. He would give her everything.

"What do you need?" He whispered, pulling her closer still to his naked body. Amy moaned and slid her body against his.

"You. I just need you. I need you closer. Please," She said quietly, her soft voice belaying her adoration and her need for him.

"You have me, Amy. You have me now and always. All of me," Sheldon said with feeling, kissing Amy's neck and trailing his lips tenderly down to her breast. His fingers set out an exploration, mapping each freckle and line; committing them to his perfect memory.

"You feel so good. I've missed you this week," He whispered, enjoying the feeling of Amy stretching out against him like a feline. He lay beside her, kissing her breasts and setting his hands ahead to explore. Warm fingers trailed down her hip, gauging her comfort level as he resumed his earlier task of setting her sensitive flesh afire.

"You feel amazing. Oh, Amy…"Sheldon moaned as he caressed her, his fingers sliding inside to find her even more aroused than before.. He couldn't wait another second to join with her. Neither could she, he realized, as Amy impatiently tugged his hips against her own. "Why did you do this?" He asked her curiously, and Amy wasn't too far gone to understand his query. Shyly, she faced him.

"I just…I wanted to look beautiful. For you."

Sheldon slowed his actions.

"You always look beautiful, Amy."

Her eyes watered at his gentle tone.

"Do you not like it?" She questioned, reaching up a hand to caress his cheek. His eyes lowered at the feel of her touch.

"Yes. I _do_ like it. Probably more than I should," He admitted shakily.

Amy smiled a feminine smile.

"Oh? And is that wrong?" She asked, her voice once again sounding predatory.

Sheldon leaned into her touch, rubbing his cheek against her palm.

"No. Not wrong. Just…it's not something Sheldon Cooper would normally dwell on. I can't claim to be Homo Novus anymore," He admitted.

Amy grinned.

"Hmmm…did I blow Dr. Cooper's mind?" She asked huskily, leaning up to nip his chin. Sheldon groaned.

"Y-yes." He admitted, resuming his fondling. Amy moved beneath him, already climbing to the point of no return. Everything about this man turned her on. His voice. His looks. His incredible mind.

"So tell me, Dr. Cooper. How _much_ do you like it?" She asked breathlessly.

His eyes strayed down her body, and he felt his manhood harden further at the visual her gorgeous body provided.

"Very much. You feel _so_ good," He whispered, stroking her deeper.

Amy undulated beneath him, her eyes rolling shut.

"Mmm…how good?" She asked, beginning her own exploration as her soft hand reached down, beginning to pump his shaft firmly. Sheldon groaned, sinking closer to his wife. He thrust himself into Amy's hand even tighter.

"Oh, Dear. _Too_ good," He choked out, as Amy's thumb caressed the underside of his head.

"Describe how good," She pushed, kissing a path down his throat and latching onto his Adams's apple. Sheldon was losing control quickly, his body tense and ready to snap.

"Sexy. So sexy," He whimpered. "Everything about you is just…too much."

Amy moaned as Sheldon's thumb caressed her clitoris gently.

"I did it for you. I wanted to be sexy for _you_," She cried, stroking him faster.

"Oh. God," He whimpered, fearing if she didn't stop with her touches, her kisses, and her words, that this was going to end very quickly.

"Sheldon…tell me," She implored, taking her hands away but not ceasing the torture with her mouth. She took his lower lip inside her mouth, her tongue sensuously stroking his.

"Amy…you're so soft. Wet. God, I need you so badly," He begged, the string inside of him snapping.

He fell into the cradle of her body perfectly. The action, although familiar, now seemed sacred. This was now his _wife_ he was making love to. His mate. They were truly pair bonded now, in every way, shape, and form. The thought left him breathless as Amy slid her leg across his hip, pulling him into her deeper.

His mind raced back to a time, to a place…years prior when hadn't yet met Amy. Didn't yet know the pleasure of having such a wondrous creature in his life. He wanted to cry from the sorrow he felt, at how lonely he truly was. He pretended not to need anyone or anything. He was a shell of a man; existing on a whim, and not understanding his true purpose here on Earth. Every step that led him to this moment was mapped out for him, yet he was blinded by conceit and his pompous need to be in control.

As his eyes met hers in the dim light, he swore he saw his soul reflected back at him. It was clear, and clean. And…renewed.

"I will remember this moment until I draw my last breath," He swore, pushing inside of her gently and closing his eyes momentarily in rapture. He looked down at Amy's precious face, the love he felt for her pushing out everything else.

"…Oh…." He moaned as he filled her. Her wetness engulfed him, the smoothness of her womanhood sliding against him in the most delicious manner possible. His eyes fell shut helplessly as she swiveled her hips, meeting his thrusts.

He took both of her hands in his own, using the leverage to push himself against her. He was too aroused, too stimulated. The feel of her was like nothing he'd ever felt. Perhaps it was that she now bore his name. He thought back to Leonard's words. It _was _different, not. So much different. The thought made him swell even harder inside of her.

"Amy…Amy…Yes," He groaned, unable to stay in this position another moment. He was so close to the edge already, and he wanted to make this last for his wife. Rearing up, Sheldon sat back on his haunches and pulled Amy upon his legs to straddle him. She cried out as he firmly grabbed her backside, settling her upon him to set the rhythm.

"Sheldon… you feel so good. I love you, I love you so much," She chanted desperately, her arms weaving around his neck and her hands lovingly stroking his soft hair. The feel of her touch was like a pleasure he never dared to imagine. The care, concern, and love he felt in every caress touched him to the very depth of his soul.

"Make love to me, Amy. Never stop." He begged, using every ounce of strength he had to hold her against him as she granted him his wish. "I love you, Amy. I will never stop loving you. Ever," He vowed, meeting each thrust and not willing to tear his focus away from her. They clung to each other tightly as they danced this most erotic of dances.

Sheldon felt the second her body surrendered, tightening around his flesh and making his eyes roll backwards in his head.

"Oh, Amy…please," He cried, letting go of everything. He could have sworn he blacked out for a moment as his vision clouded and the heavens once again opened to him.

After several moments of soft panting and deep, wet kisses…Amy pulled away to gaze at her husband.

"You are so amazing, Sheldon. The way you make me feel…" She trailed off, trying to catch her breath.

Sheldon stroked her back tenderly, each of them coming down from the incredible high they just experienced.

Gently scooping her up in his arms, he walked her into the bathroom and ran a bubble bath for them, reminiscent of the one they shared the weekend they first became lovers.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

Hours later, after a very relaxing bath and room service had delivered them a snack, Sheldon and Amy lay together in the luxurious bed just holding each other. He had meant what he said earlier; he would not let her get dressed after her bath, content instead to gaze upon her nakedness and feel her silky skin alongside his. He had never felt so…_ravenous _before; desperate to have her body touching his. Her softness and warmth made him feel like he could climb a mountain. He felt pure joy, and courage flowing through his veins.

All those years of isolating himself, even from her. His perfect mind wandered back to the near past; even so far back as the week before Amy fell sick. He had woken up in a panic after that dream with Arthur; so afraid to give in to the love that he knew he felt. Admitting it to Amy had been the easy part, he found. _Surrendering_ himself to it, was something else entirely.

To have missed out on this…this _magic._ He shuddered to imagine his life without her. Perhaps Amy was right all those weeks ago. Maybe Amy's near death experience had been just what he needed to snap him out of his stupor. He never wanted to entertain the thought she was mere fodder for his ego. But he would still be stumbling in the dark, most definitely lost without her.

Amy shifted her body, sliding her legs alongside his own. Sheldon entwined their feet, settling his weight upon her from behind. He could quite happily stay this way until they left for New York in two day's time.

"Are you tired?" He asked gently, nuzzling her under her ear. She smelled incredible, but then again, she always did. Her entire body smelled of roses. Sheldon inhaled deeply, sliding his hand along her hip and making patterns on her flesh with gentle movements.

"I guess I should be, but I'm not," She answered, her voice content. "Strangely enough, I could run a marathon right now."

Sheldon hummed thoughtfully into her hair, agreeing with his wife.

After their exhausting day, emotionally and physically, the couple was surprised to find how much energy they had still. Amy supposed it was the adrenaline high they were both coming down from, and smiled into her pillow.

Sheldon was spooning her from behind, both of them watching the water through the patio door. From their vantage, they could see the full moon reflecting on the water. The scene was intensely romantic, and Amy snuggled into the warmth of the bed with Sheldon behind her.

"Did you enjoy today, Amy? Did it meet your expectations?" Sheldon asked hopefully, moving Amy's hair aside and kissing her neck tenderly. She melted into his kiss, nodding.

"Yes, Sheldon. It _more_ than met my expectations. Then again, it would have if it were just you and I. But to have our family there…it was very special. How about you? Are _you_ happy?" Amy ventured, turning her head slightly to give him her full attention. The look he fixed her with made her want to cry.

"There are no words for how I feel right now, Amy." He said, his voice sounding awed. "Even with my vast knowledge of the Universe and everything it holds, I am speechless. I never dreamt that I could feel what I could only describe as pure joy. And it's all because of you." He whispered sincerely.

Amy blinked lazily, her eyes following a path from his eyes to his lips. As she so often did, Amy found herself needing to kiss him more than she needed to breath. His mouth held endless allure for her. Pouty, full lips, always wet and inviting. She turned his head to meet him halfway, taking his bottom lip into her mouth tenderly and stroking it with her tongue. Sheldon surrendered to her, allowing her to kiss him as she wished, and when it was over he looked at his wife with glassy eyes and a pounding heart.

"That was nice," He murmured, nuzzling her chin with his nose. Amy chucked breathily, releasing a deep sigh.

"Good." She answered, smiling serenely.

Sheldon stared at her with a soft expression.

"No one has ever wanted me, Amy. Loved me. Needed me before. No one cared. Only you." He said, his voice open and raw. Amy stroked his cheek, falling more in love with him in that moment than she ever was before.

"That's because our love was written in the stars, Sheldon." She joked tenderly, giggling at her own joke.

Sheldon's breath caught in his throat at the opening she gave him.

_Now. The time was now._ There would never be a more _perfect_ moment.

Sheldon pulled away slightly from her embrace, meeting her eyes in the near darkness.

"Amy…would you do something with me?" He asked seriously, the tenor of his voice loud in the otherwise quiet suite. Amy turned in his arms to face him. He looked so damn handsome at that moment; all big blue eyes and porcelain skin. His hair was mussed becomingly, and she smoothed the longer fringe back flat against his head with gentle movements.

"Of course, Sheldon. What is it?" She asked him sweetly, her curiosity growing when he sat up and threw his boxer's on. Next came a pair of board shorts, and then his Batman t shirt. Alone, without an undershirt. Amy sat up as well, her eyes seeking his. She smiled at the way his muscles flexed on his arms, unhidden by a thermal. He came to sit beside her on the bed, and traced his fingers down the side of her cheek.

"Take a walk with me. On the beach. I need to show you something. It's important to me." He said softly.

_A walk on the beach?_

Amy watched him, intrigued, as Sheldon seemed to be waiting with baited breath for her to agree.

"Show me something? On the beach? At…" She squinted her eyes towards the clock, surprised to see it was only 11 pm. It seemed so much later for some reason. "11:00?"

Sheldon nodded, swallowing thickly as his eyes seared into hers. It wasn't like him to act so cryptic, and that was her first clue that whatever it was he wanted to 'show' her, must be of import. Standing up, she dressed hastily as well. He sat on the bed and watched her as she slipped on a pair of sandals, before running a brush through her silky stands.

"Alright." She said softly, taking his hand and smiling when he squeezed it tightly.

"Thank you, Amy." He whispered, securing their room card in his pocket before ushering her out the door.

They took the elevator down to the beach, stepping off the patio and walking the short journey down to the water's edge. The full moon cast shadows over the water, and Amy could see gulf gulls in the sky flying across the horizon. In the distance, Pleasure Pier was lit up, it's neon lights and rollercoasters glittering happily.

It brought back memories of another walk on the beach in the moonlight, the night before their lives were changed forever. Amy pushed away that horrible memory, determined to replace it with better ones. Starting tonight.

Suddenly Sheldon stopped, and turned Amy to face him. He still held her hands, and Amy noted that his were trembling. He looked positively serious, so Amy tried to lighten the mood.

"So, Dr. Cooper…what is it you wanted to show me?" She asked playfully. "Why are we out here when we could be back in our honeymoon suite?"

Sheldon smiled warmly at his bride, stepping up so closely to her that their bodies touched. He _had_ to get this right. No matter what. He took her face in his hands, cradling it tenderly. Amy watched him, unsure what was happening. She herself began to tremble. Still, she waited for him to come to terms with whatever it was he had to say.

"I used to hate the beach. _This_ beach in particular. It was always crowded and loud, especially in the season. Missy would drag me here when we were kids, and I'd begrudgingly follow her. The last time I was here, I was not in a good place. Mentally," He clarified quietly, continuing as Amy listened to him in silence. "I almost didn't come that day. I almost stayed back at Mama's to watch TV." He said, sounding far away.

She could tell whatever day he was referring to, that he was conjuring the memory up in his mind. Amy studied him, amazed at degree of his memory.

Sheldon looked up, staring at her deeply. She had never seen this look in his eyes before. Amy smiled softly at him.

_What in the world was going through his mind_, she wondered.

"Amy…back in the suite, you said our love was written in the stars. Do you believe that? Do you… believe in fate?" He asked her, his voice soft.

The strange question coming from her scientific minded husband startled her. She stared at Sheldon blankly.

"Fate? Why would you ask that?" She asked him, clearly confused. She was not sure where he was going with this. But Sheldon didn't make her wait long.

"I never believed in Fate before. As you know, my mind is rooted in the tangible. I'm a Scientist. I'm an agnostic. I never gave much thought to the supernatural, if not to try and dispute it." He said, his voice holding a hint of regret.

Amy nodded thoughtfully.

"I know. I share your beliefs," She attested, squeezing his hands. Sheldon broke free of one, reaching into his shorts pocket and unearthing a small parcel wrapped in cream paper. He held it between them, and Amy got the distinct impression he had planned this all along.

"Our belief system isn't all that we share," He murmured, presenting the box to her in one hand. Amy stared at the box, tilting her head.

"What is that?" She asked curiously. Amy watched as her husband took a deep breath, letting it out heavily.

"This, Amy…this is my wedding gift to you," He answered softly, his eyes never leaving hers. "This is the culmination of everything that I believe in. Everything I trust. This is the proof that I've always sought, but never found. Until now." He said resolutely.

The way he was looking at her made her heart actually hurt. There was so much tenderness in his gaze. Amy's lips trembled as she stared down at the beautifully wrapped present, secured with a silky pink bow. She couldn't imagine a gift that would be of more significance than what he'd already given her today; his name. Yet her eyes watered at the way he was staring at her. Whatever this _gift_ was, it obviously meant a lot to him.

"Sheldon…you didn't have to…" She whispered, wondering why he wanted to present this gift to her here, of all places, and not in their room.

Sheldon attempted to smile, but it fell flat. She could see that he was nervous.

"Yes. I did. You have no _idea_ how much." He said, watching her with eyes full of love. "Please, read the card first," He implored.

She bit her lip, nodding her head.

"How is your Latin?" He asked her curiously, a lilt of playfulness in his voice as Amy unfastened the bow and pulled out the small card which lay secured below.

"Um…pretty good," She said, smiling at him as she pulled the card from its sheave. Her eyes read the words three times before she comprehended them.

"Audere est Facere," She whispered, her eyes meeting his.

Sheldon could see her trying to piece together the meaning of his words.

"Translate it," He whispered back, biting his lip. Amy mimicked his action, biting her lip as well.

"It means…to dare is to do."

Amy stood motionless, not sure what this meant. Sheldon offered no clues as he stood watching her, the gentle lull of the surf against the shore the only sound for miles.

"Look inside," Sheldon urged, his eyes drawing hers to the box once again.

"Okay," She breathed out, more curious than ever.

Amy pulled aside first the lid, and then the tissue paper, staring at what lay nestled below. Her soft smile disappeared. Her eyes teared up immediately and she raised them to Sheldon's, thunderstruck.

Sheldon was watching her closely. He had worried when the time came to deliver this back to Amy, if she could accept it. He wondered all day if he was making the right decision to give it to her now, here…on this beach where he himself had found it. Now he knew, his decision was the right one.

It all came back to this. This was where it began for him. This would be where it would begin anew. For _them_.

Amy began to cry, loud sobs breaking forth from her throat. She hadn't even lifted the bottle out of the box yet. But Sheldon was certain Amy knew what it was.

"I don't understand. Where did you get this…how?" She rasped softly, shaking her head in disbelief.

Sheldon lowered his eyes, trying to figure out where to even begin. At the beginning, he decided.

"I found it, Amy. Here. On this beach, in Galveston. Nine years ago," He murmured. Amy's mouth fell open.

"You…you _found_ it? But that's….that's…" She stuttered, her voice shaken. He could see the wheels spinning in her mind, trying to calculate the timeline. Her eyes met his, helplessly, and he swallowed.

"Impossible?" He whispered knowingly, his eyes searching hers.

Amy could barely nod in agreement.

"Is it?" He challenged softly, the out of character conversation they were having making her feel light headed. Fate…messages in bottles…it was too much. What was going on here? Amy shook her head, trying to clear it. Had she hit her head again? Was she hallucinating? She ran through every possible scenario, but each seemed as far-fetched as the reality.

"Sheldon…this can't be. It's not real. It's not…logical," She stammered, her choice of words sending pleasurable tingles throughout his body. She was assimilating to him more and more each day. He loved how she quoted his beloved Sci-Fi now without even realizing it. Each new aspect of his Amy was lovelier than the last.

"Logic is relative," He said softly, smiling. "Besides…I don't have all of the answers. I never did. But that's alright. I see that now. And it's…exhilarating. To not have to be the one who knows everything, all of the time. I only know what I can see. What I can touch. And…I see _this_, Amy. I can touch _this_. That is the only truth I need to believe in. There is only one Science I know that exists. One I can prove without a shadow of a doubt. The Science of us. Of Sheldon and Amy. I sound like quite the hippy now, don't I?" He asked happily.

Amy gasped. She stared at her husband, never before seeing him. Truly seeing him.

She had spent years hoping that Sheldon would lower his defenses enough to let her in. All the while, Fate was working on him. Molding him. Shaping him. Was this real? Was it honestly happening?

Sheldon took Amy's free hand in his own, kissing it passionately before cradling it against his cheek. He closed his eyes at the way her touch felt.

"Who are you? And what have you done with my Sheldon?" She asked tenderly, fearing she was about to wake up and discover this was all a dream. A beautiful, unattainable dream and she would find herself 13 years old, alone, and fearing for the future. But no such horror was forthcoming.

"How did this happen, Sheldon? I don't understand," She whispered honestly. Sheldon nodded gently.

"I don't know, Amy. The odds are 27,890,776,435,288 to one. I did the math." He said in self-deprecation.

Amy's face twitched in shocked amusement. Of course he did the math. Of _course_ he did. Yet even if he hadn't…in her hands sat her very bottle which she tossed into the ocean 11 years ago. Removing the fragile glass carefully, she cradled it in her hands. It looked exactly the same. The beauty of the bottle took her breath away. The significance of this moment was too much to contemplate.

"How did you know it was mine?" She asked incredulously.

Sheldon took a step closer to her.

"The night we watched that film you mentioned that you threw a bottle into the sea. That wasn't what startled me; lots of people do that. It was what you said you wrote on the message. At first, I thought it wasn't true. But then it was impossible for it to be otherwise. What did you write, Amy? Tell me," He whispered.

Amy gazed at him, stunned.

"That was why you went home to Texas, wasn't it? Because of this? It had to be. You were fine all evening, until I mentioned that." She said, and Sheldon nodded. He took another step closer.

"Tell me what you wrote," He implored again, softer this time.

"I wrote…Do I dare, disturb the Universe," She whimpered, her voice faltering. Sheldon smiled, cupping her face in his hands and smiling at her like she was Heaven. She was. She was _his _Heaven, right here on Earth.

_Finally_. It was done. They were free.

"To dare is to do…you _dared_, my brave Amy. You did. And because you did, I did as well. You dared to hope; dared to wish. Dared to dream. Your immense love and gravity pulled me into your orbit. Your dreams and hopes became mine, the day you threw that bottle into the sea. As you were waiting for me…I was waiting for you. I was so lonely, living in denial. That's why I found that bottle. That is why I kept it safe all of these years. That's why that computer matched us. That's why when I first laid eyes on you, I spared you a second glance, when I never did for anyone else. I loved you before I knew you, Amy. You were _always_ meant to be mine. In this life, and any other life."

Sheldon's voice faltered as his tears fell rapidly. He watched happily as the veil of confusion lifted from Amy's face, acceptance and joy taking its place.

Sheldon had found her bottle. Not only that, incredible as it was, but he had kept it. Even before they had met, he had that bottle in his possession. The ramifications of this situation floored her.

"Do you know what you're saying, Sheldon? Do you have _any_ idea what this means?" Amy asked him fearfully, hesitant to even voice such a notion. But her fears were quickly displaced when Sheldon nodded serenely.

"Yes. It means we belong to each other. Always have, and always will. Soulmates." He whispered, the certainty in his voice causing Amy to sob.

"You…you found me, Sheldon. The real me." She cried, unable to comprehend such a gift.

Sheldon tilted her chin, looking deeply into the eyes he loved so much.

"You found _me_, Amy. That bottle was a piece of you. You threw it out; you threw me a lifeline, and I took it. The day I met you, my fate was already sealed. Do you have any idea, how freeing it is? How comforting? To know you were there all along? To know that in all of my inadequacies and failings, someone was looking out for me. You, Amy. It was you." Sheldon sobbed, kissing his wife for all he was worth.

The bottle was clutched between them, anchoring them to this world. But each knew their love story began somewhere and sometime long ago. Husband and wife stood there together, crying softly on the cool sand. They pulled apart, neither one knowing what to say. It was Sheldon who found the words first, as he often did.

"Now you know. I told you, one day you would know the depth of my love for you. The breadth of my devotion. We've come full circle, now. And right here, is where I want to begin anew. With you, Amy Cooper." Sheldon said, his voice sweet and tender.

Amy laughed, covering her mouth with her hands. This was too much. How had this happened, to_ her_ of all people? The ugly duckling, the outcast…how and why had she been blessed with such fortune? Such Providence?

A little girl had been alone her entire life, hoping and praying for someone to notice her. She would have been content with a kind word, a cordial smile…the love story she was gifted with instead had exceeded her Earthly expectations.

Were they merely mortals, or were they something other? Was their love written in the stars, or was it merely happenstance? Did it matter, anyway?

There would never again be such a love, Sheldon knew. Amy knew, as well, as she gazed at her husband with new eyes. He had carried this secret for almost a year. She laughed through her tears, impressed anew at his level of willpower. She held out her palm in a welcoming gesture.

"I'm Amy Farrah Fowler. You're Sheldon Cooper. How lovely to make your acquaintance." She said sweetly. Sheldon stared at her proffered hand, smiling widely.

"Hello, Amy Farrah _Cooper_," He emphasized, making Amy smile wider. "I love the way that sounds rolling off my tongue."

Amy smiled, holding up her bottle and admiring its beauty. To see her standing there, with this bottle in her hand…it made Sheldon's heart beat rapidly.

"Thank you, for keeping this in your safe possession. I never thought I'd see it again." She whispered, loving how its facets glistened in the moonlight.

"There is no other place on Earth this bottle was meant to be, then with me. To have you both, now…I'm a lucky man indeed." Sheldon whispered reverently. "I love you, Amy."

Amy gazed at Sheldon with absolute nothing short of adoration.

"And I love you, Sheldon."

Sheldon wiped away the copious tears that fell down his bride's cheeks.

"I've crossed oceans of time to find you," Sheldon quoted, lowering his forehead to his beloved. They embraced tightly, bound for eternity by chains even stronger than iron.

**XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**

A noise startled Sheldon deep in the night, and he sat up in bed slowly. His wife was sleeping peacefully beside him, her naked body keeping the bed warm in the otherwise chilled room.

_His wife…_

Sheldon would never get tired of hearing that. Saying that. Thinking that. They'd been married for little less than 18 hours, and yet he ached with love for her. He didn't see that changing anytime soon. He looked down on her with soft eyes, tracing the contours of her.

The noise sounded again, coming from the balcony. Sheldon got out of bed, throwing on the robe that was draped over a chair, giving Amy one last look before he went to investigate.

Sliding open the massive glass slider, he looked first to the left, and then to the right. He didn't see anything other than the ocean and the billowy swirls of the curtains.

"Hello?" He whispered, a twinge of apprehension in his voice. If there _had_ been an intruder, alerting them to the fact he knew they were there probably wasn't the best course of action. Of course, Sheldon had no idea that he was dreaming.

The balcony was dark, yet seemingly empty. Sheldon shrugged. Perhaps it was the wind that he heard. Turning to go back inside, he was startled to hear a soft voice ring out.

"I'm very proud of you, Son."

The voice stunned Sheldon, drawing him back to sit on the plush couch on the balcony as he looked around in fear.

"Who is that?" He whispered choked out fearfully, marginally relieved when Arthur came into view out of the shadows. Sheldon heaved a sigh of relief.

"Professor Proton. You scared me," He said needlessly.

The older man could see Sheldon was indeed shaken by the way the younger man clutched his chest. Arthur smiled at his friend, admiring how good he looked. So much different than he looked nearly two years ago. A lot had changed, it seemed. Arthur's gaze flickered toward the room, where Sheldon's wife lay slumbering peacefully before returning to Sheldon's wide eyed gaze.

"I know, Sheldon. I'm s-sorry. But this is the last time I can visit you. I didn't want to leave you without you k-knowing." He said, making Sheldon narrow his eyes.

"Knowing what?" He asked curiously, leaning forward to gaze at his idol. His heartbeat had returned to a normal rhythm.

Arthur smiled, pride evident in his face.

"Just what I s-said, Sheldon. I'm proud of you. I see you took my advice. Good boy."

"Thank you," Sheldon stammered, swallowing away the feeling of embarrassment he felt. But Arthur wasn't judging him; he could see that clearly. A thought occurred to Sheldon then, and he stood up to face Arthur.

"Did you know? About…everything that happened, with Amy getting sick, and…the bottle?" Sheldon whispered. Arthur smiled sadly.

"Yes. In a way, but…it wasn't my p-place to tell you. Sometimes, Sheldon…we h-have to hit rock bottom before we can see the top. You exceeded expectations, you know. You really s-stepped up. You're a good man," He praised, his face splitting in a wide smile that had Sheldon following.

He gazed fondly at him mentor, Arthur's words suddenly hitting him.

"You said…this is the last time I'll see you. Why?" Sheldon asked sadly, his eyes reflecting the sorrow that statement made him feel.

Arthur sighed deeply, looking out to sea.

"Because, Sheldon…you've grown. You've learned how to s-stand now. I gave you some sound advice 19 months ago. I'm glad to know you followed it. You d-don't need me anymore," He pointed out, his words making Sheldon frown.

"I will always need you, Arthur." He said quietly, looking down lest he start crying. Arthur put his hand on Sheldon's shoulder gently.

"You will be just fine, Son. You have a wonderful w-wife now. She's a pistol, that one. She will see you through. And you have f-fine friends. I can't tell you the happiness that awaits you. Again, it's n-not my place. But I can assure you, it will be…magical."

Sheldon tilted his head as he studied Arthur's steadfast gaze.

"Magical…" Sheldon murmured, the word touching him in a way few words did. Something about it seemed so…possible. Something inside of him said to speak the words aloud to Arthur, so that he would leave secure in the knowledge that he had, in fact, grown.

"I love her." He said resolutely. Arthur nodded at the surety of Sheldon's tone.

"I know," Arthur answered. "And the best part? She loves you. You are very lucky."

Sheldon nodded his head in agreement.

"Will I…remember this?" Sheldon asked him. Arthur shook his head remorsefully.

"No, Sheldon. I'm afraid you won't. But I want you to know something- I'll always be n-near you. If you need me, I'll be around. You may not see me or hear me, but I'll be there."

With no choice other than to agree, Sheldon nodded.

"Arthur?" Sheldon said loudly, afraid Arthur would disappear before he had the chance to tell him.

Professor Proton turned, waiting for Sheldon to speak.

"She _is _worth everything. I see that now. Thank you, for pointing that out to me." Sheldon said sincerely. Sheldon wondered if he hadn't listened to Arthur after that dream long ago, if he would be standing here today. He owed him so much, for simply giving Sheldon the shove he needed.

Arthur came back, patting Sheldon's shoulder gently.

"You're w-welcome, Son. I knew you would see it. I always knew you were a smart man, Sheldon. I had faith in you. I wish you a long and joyful life together."

Sheldon watched him take his leave, fading like mist. This time though, in stark contrast to last, he had absolutely no fear as he watched him depart. Arthur had given him a beautiful gift. He was going to cherish it, for the rest of his life. He was no longer fearful of the future, however uncertain.

"Embrace the chaos," Sheldon whispered, beginning to laugh. Once again, the only sound that met his ears was the wind moving through the curtains.

As he opened the slider to return to his wife, a soft voice drifted in his ears stopping him in his tracks.

"Yes, Sheldon. Embrace it. Be cognizant of it. And…w-welcome it."

Sheldon stood still, allowing Arthur's words to sink in.

"I will. I promise," He vowed.

Returning to his nuptial bed, he gazed at the sleeping beauty residing there. She embodied all that was good in his world; every goal he would set for the rest of his life, would be with her interest in his mind and heart. She would guide him, as he would guide her. Together, they would be an unstoppable force of nature. They would fulfil each other's dreams, and comfort each other like no other. She was truly the key to his happiness. And he would bless _her_ with happiness, beyond imagination. He could hardly wait to wake up, and begin their life together.

"Thank you, Amy. For loving me. For allowing me to love you. And for never giving up on me." He whispered, kissing her shoulder tenderly.

Sheldon fell into a deep sleep, his Soulmate resting peacefully beside him.

He_ had_ found the right door, and the right key in which to unlock it. He stepped inside, closing it firmly shut behind him.

He was never emerging again.

A/N – So it ends as it began. With a dream. This time, Sheldon got it right. Sheldon's quote on the beach was from Bram Stoker's Dracula. It seemed appropriate, both for the bottle reference and the Soulmate aspect. There will be an epilogue soon. I cannot tell you the emotions I feel right now. I can only say this- Thank you. Please let me know your thoughts. Love, Jo x


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43 ~ Epilogue 1

**A/N- I cannot properly express my gratitude to everyone for the support you have shown to me and to my story. It has been a wonderful journey with you, fellow Shamy Shippers. This has been an incredible time for me, both as a fan and as a writer. Along the way, I've met so many wonderful readers and friends. I've been blessed to share my story with you. I feel like I've spent my entire life writing this story; it's been my constant companion for 15 months. I've watched major high points and major low points come and go on the show, and through it all, I've kept my vision for our favorite couple. No matter what the Powers That Be decide, I have secured for them a happily ever after. **

**I know I changed our favorite Physicist a bit, but it was my vision for him and mine alone. He had to yield a bit to go where I wanted to take him. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. It's been an absolute pleasure and an honor to share this with you. Again, a thank you to everyone who joined me. I'd like to dedicate this epilogue to Jim Parsons and Mayim Bialik. The way they bring these characters to life and in the process, bring us joy, is incredible. I can only hope if they one day read this story, that it makes them smile. **

**There will be A LOT of joy here, but also many tears. Have tissues at the ready. I'd love to hear your thoughts; something tells me we will all need a big hug fest after this. **

**After much back and forth, I have decided to break the epilogue into three parts. It would be too long, otherwise, and I want to make sure that I give each 'part' the respect its due. **

**On a final note, a friend and reviewer pointed out a faux pas on my part last chapter. In chapter 40, when Sheldon and Amy spent Thanksgiving with her family, I had originally written Sheldon meeting Amy's Stepfather for the first time. I wrote previously that Amy's father passed away. Due to wanting to include everything Shamy related in chapter 40, I wrote out that part of meeting Amy's Stepfather, yet failed to call him that when he walked her down the aisle. No, Mr. Fowler didn't miraculously return from the great beyond. So sorry for the continuity snafu.**

**I have already begun a new Sheldon/Amy story. I don't know when I will post it, but I am not going anywhere. I hope you will follow that story as well. Please put me on author alert to be notified.**

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…And if you were to ask me, after all that we've been through…Still believe in magic, well yes I do. Yes I do. Yes I do. Yes I do. Of course I do…" Coldplay – Magic

_Ten Years Later…_

Sheldon studied the cards in his hand, deep in silent contemplation. The outcome here could go either way.

He was no stranger to winning, but at the moment, he wasn't so sure his intellect could save him. His opponent was crafty. He counted the cards in his head, yet wasn't confident he had what it took to play this hand to the end successfully. It wouldn't be the first time this little spitfire upended him.

He tried to adapt a 'poker face', but it was useless.

Releasing the breath he was holding, Sheldon muttered to his partner the two words that would seal his fate.

"Go Fish."

A large, round pair of eyes looked up at him, giving away nothing. Sheldon watched as the eyes in question flickered down, momentarily raising back to his and narrowing shrewdly.

"Daddy… I think you are fibbing. Mommy said your eye goes all funny when you fib."

Sheldon chuckled playfully, before catching himself and fixing a stern set to his jaw. There was absolutely _nothing_ that he could pull over on his little girl.

He felt the smile dawn on his face as he watched his baby. She was the epitome of Amy; from her brilliance at the tender age of 4, to her beauty which was striking. Dark, long, wavy hair coupled with sparkling green eyes. Much lighter than Amy's, the color of grass. The moment he had witnessed the doctor bring her into the world at birth, he had fallen in love all over again. She was perfect, like her mother.

"Oh…she did, did she? And just what _exactly_ did Mommy say about my eyes, Ellie?" Sheldon asked gently, putting his cards down and leaning over the play table to give his daughter his full attention. He gave her the patented Sheldon Cooper eyebrow lift, usually reserved for the rare occasion when he figured out when someone was trying to pull something over on him.

Ellie giggled, putting her cards down as well. She mirrored Sheldon's position, making his smile grow wider. She was at the imitating stage now; every gesture and word he or Amy produced was duplicated.

"Mommy said when you fib, your eyes twitch. Like this," The little girl supplied, winking adorably to imitate Sheldon's long suffering habit of twitching when either lying, or trying to keep a secret. Sheldon burst into laughter, leaning over and scooping the girl up quickly.

"Oh yeah? Well, Mommy's in big trouble. And so are you!" Sheldon laughed, tickling his daughter within an inch of her life. Ellie rolled around on Sheldon's lap, squirming and trying to free herself.

Just inside the doorway, the stern sound of a throat clearing rang out. Sheldon turned around, spying his wife and their 7 year old son standing there, both wearing twin smiles.

"Help me, Stephen." The little girl lisped adorably, trying to sound like a damsel in distress even though she was giggling uncontrollably. She may have had her mother's beauty, but she had her father's lisp and the effect was adorable. Sheldon chuckled heartily.

"What are you doing to Ellie?" Stephen shouted, abandoning his place by Amy to join the fray. He jumped on top of Sheldon, gently pummeling him. "I'll save you, Ellie." Stephen promised, climbing on top of Sheldon's back. Sheldon laughed until he nearly lost his breath.

"Hey! No fair. Two against one is never fair," Sheldon complained, beseeching Amy with his eyes for a little help. Amy shook her head of her family's antics, crossing her arms against her chest.

"Surely a genius of your caliber can fight off a couple of children, Dr. Cooper." Amy said mischievously, shooting her husband a sly look.

Sheldon snorted, catching a tiny elbow in his chin.

"Ouch! Not when the children are_ your_ offspring, Dr. Cooper." Sheldon said warmly, getting a few tickles in before Stephen and Ellie began anew. Their energy and vigor were boundless. And Sheldon loved every minute of it.

Stephen took pity on his father, climbing into his lap and hugging him tightly. Ellie followed, her tiny cherubic hands latching around Sheldon's neck.

Amy stood there watching them, her heart ready to burst at the serene look on Sheldon's face. His eyes drifted shut a moment before settling on hers. The look he gave her was pure love.

Amy felt she could die in this moment, and be quite happy. But it was best not to tempt fate. She had way too much living to do. She smiled at her husband, stepping up to him and joining in with the hug.

"So, what prompted this?" Amy asked with her no nonsense tone. Ellie sat up, tracing her miniscule fingers along Sheldon's lips.

"Daddy tried to cheat again, Mommy." Ellie said, giggling. "But I remembered what you said about his eyes."

Amy's eyes widened for her daughter's benefit.

"Really, Daddy?" Amy scolded, giving Sheldon a mock glare. He took her hand, kissing it.

"I don't know how a four year old can outwit me. She is too smart for her own good," Sheldon said, pride mixed with annoyance clear in his voice. Amy giggled sweetly as she watched Sheldon grimace.

"That's because she is _my_ daughter, Sheldon." Amy said proudly. She stole another quick kiss from her husband before gathering the children to bring them downstairs for dinner.

"Oh, I see. When she outwits me, she's _your_ daughter. How convenient." He said dryly.

Amy shrugged, laughing lightly.

"Come on, everyone. Dinner is almost ready and I want hands and faces washed." Amy said, authority and loved mixed in her voice. The children trotted after her dutifully, Stephen asking his mother a question and Ellie turning to wave at Sheldon with a look of adoration that made his heart ache. He waved back.

"I'll be right there," He promised, standing up.

Sheldon watched them leave, already feeling a strange hole in his heart once they were out of sight. He sat back down at the play table, smiling to himself.

Could life be any more perfect, he thought.

No. The answer was no.

So much had happened in the ten years since that fateful night on Galveston Beach when he gave Amy back her bottle. For a man who once prided himself on his ability to be content on his own, the idea of that now seemed like a distant, lonely memory.

He never imagined his life would be so full of happiness. So…complete. But with Amy by his side, it was impossible for it not to be.

Thinking back to the beginning of that first morning as a married man, he smiled. He had awakened the day after their wedding to his beautiful wife, already awake and watching him silently. Her tender expression held a wealth of messages.

_I love you._

_I want you._

_I accept you._

_Thank you._

He had reached out and gently caressed her cheek, the warmth and softness touching a part of him he never knew existed. But in Sheldon Cooper style, he had to temper the gentleness with the mirth.

"You know you freak me out when you gawk at me like that," Sheldon said, yet his voice held a tinge of humor. He smiled at her sweet face, and the way she didn't respond. No words were needed, really. Not after the night they had shared. Pulling Amy tightly against him, he rolled her underneath him in one swift move.

"I'm so sorry about that, Dr. Cooper. I'll have to watch myself in the future." Amy murmured, sinking further into the bed to accommodate him better. She moaned softly as Sheldon shifted his hips against hers.

"Mmm…" Sheldon sighed, kissing Amy's neck gently before sliding his mouth up to whisper in her ear. "Don't worry, little lady. I'll do the watching from now on." He said huskily.

Amy's eyes rolled shut as he kissed a path down to her neck again, loving her with the utmost care and tenderness.

"I'm counting on it," She whispered.

Actions spoke louder than words, that morning…as husband and wife lost themselves in each other all over again.

They spent the day with family and friends on the beach, before setting out a day later on their honeymoon. True to his word he, Glenn, and Sarah built the biggest sandcastle any of them had ever seen. It had taken them five hours, but it was so massive and charming that The Galveston Daily News came out to photograph it. That night as Sheldon was packing his suitcase, he could see it from the balcony of their room and the sight made him smile.

It was a wonderful time for the couple, who learned even more about each other on their journey.

It was like the pain and awkwardness of their first few years had morphed into this beautiful understanding. They had grown first as individuals, and then later, as a couple. Amy had witnessed the growth in Sheldon, its genesis like the dawning sun on a new planet. He was still her Sheldon; picky, fussy, and generally obnoxious when he wanted to be. But at his core, Sheldon was so much more relaxed. Much more…human.

Love had softened the man once so tightly wound. Love had transformed him in a multitude of ways.

Sheldon in turn, reveled in the changes in his wife. She was confident, more open, and not as socially awkward anymore. They both had blossomed together, as he knew they would. Together, they were indeed an unstoppable force.

As their own lives blossomed, so did their friend's lives.

Leonard and Penny had decided to wait a few years to have a baby, due to the fact Penny's acting career had really taken off. She got a job with a touring company of Off-Broadway productions, and was very successful. They figured she'd devote five years to acting before settling down to start a family. Five years and six months later, Samantha Louise Hofstadter arrived. True to Leonard's foretelling, she was indeed smart _and_ beautiful.

Howard and Bernadette welcomed their first child, Jacob Isaiah Wolowitz, two years after Sheldon and Amy married. Howard was over the moon to finally be a father, and Bernadette slowly warmed to the idea. Howard's mother passed away suddenly right after the baby was born, adding to the poignancy of bringing a new life into the world. It was a difficult time for the Wolowitz's, and Sheldon felt genuinely bad for his friend. Having lost his own father at such a young age, Sheldon was a great source of comfort for Howard. The two men often found themselves alone after work, sharing a drink and having deep conversations.

It was in those times that Sheldon felt most grateful. As a grown man having solid friendships with three different men, he knew he was very fortunate. For years he had kept this man at arms-length, and he felt genuinely sorry for all of that wasted time.

For an engineer, Howard was incredibly intelligent. With Sheldon's help and tutoring, Howard went back to school and joined his friends in earning a PhD. It was a proud day for Sheldon, who knew Howard had it in him all along. Never again was another joke about engineering tossed his way.

Raj and Emily had broken up a year after Sheldon and Amy married. They parted as friends, both citing the chemistry just wasn't there anymore. It was difficult for him, being around three happily pair bonded couples. But his friends never excluded him, nor made him feel bad about his situation. Raj moped about for a while, refusing to try the dating websites again. He accepted his fate, that if it would happen, it would happen naturally.

Raj got the shock of his life when, six months later, he met Amy's friend Dr. Vivian Ramirez. It was the guys' monthly excursion of playing paintball that did it.

Leonard had mistakenly pushed Sheldon down a ridge, causing him to lose his balance and injure his leg. The guys all rushed Sheldon to the ER, where Vivian was on duty. When she first walked in and saw it was Sheldon who was her patient she smiled at him gently, trying to keep him calm.

"Vivian! Thank heavens you're on duty." Sheldon said in relief, letting out a huge sigh.

"Sheldon, what happened?" She asked sweetly, pulling up a rolling stool to examine his injured leg.

Sheldon chuffed angrily.

"Someone here shouted Go! Go! Go! Before checking the clearing." He said sassily, his eyes shooting daggers at Leonard. The shorter man shrugged, his face a mask of sorrow.

"Sheldon…I said I was sorry like ten times. You know I didn't mean it," Leonard said contritely, shrugging. Sheldon shrugged as well.

"I know," Sheldon relented, petulantly crossing his arms.

Vivian chuckled, pulling out a lollypop from her top coat pocket.

"Here. How about a lollypop for my brave patient?" She asked good-naturedly, handing Sheldon the sweet and smiling when she noticed his eyes light up. She shook her head, knowing quite well by now how to deal with Sheldon Cooper.

"I'm going to check on your x-rays. Stay put and don't try to escape." She said slyly, pointing a finger at him sternly. Her eyes drifted over to the three men with him, and she smiled kindly.

"Gentlemen. Please keep him calm until I get back." Vivian asked, taking her leave.

Sheldon glanced over to Raj, noting he had reverted back to his former selective mutism at Vivian's arrival. The minute she left the room, Raj gulped and met Sheldon's curious gaze.

"You know the Dr.? Personally?" Raj asked, his voice sounding far away and awe filled. Sheldon narrowed his eyes, not catching on to Raj's strange behavior.

"Yes. She was the former paramedic that treated Amy when she…you know. Over the last two years, Amy and I have become good friends with her. We even attended her Med School graduation. Her name is Vivian Ramirez." Sheldon said, a hint of gratitude remaining in his voice.

He would be_ forever_ grateful to Vivian for the role she played in bringing Amy back from the brink.

"She's really attractive," Howard said casually, his gaze swinging to Raj. The Astrophysicist was staring at the cubicle door wide eyed, lost in thought. Howard bumped Sheldon's shoulder gently catching his attention.

"Do you think you could see if Dr. Ramirez is dating anyone?" Howard asked quietly, his eyes widening at the look of disgust Sheldon pinned him with.

"You cad. Married to a wonderful woman like Bernadette, and asking me about-"

Howard rolled his eyes and clucked his tongue.

"Not for _me_, Einstein. For _Raj_," He whispered quietly, trying to keep their conversation discreet. "Did you see the way he looked at her? I don't think I've ever seen him look at a woman like that. Not even Emily."

Sheldon nodded after a moment, appeased.

"Oh. Well…I'll talk to Amy and see what I can do." He promised.

Vivian returned briskly, brandishing Sheldon's x-ray.

"Well, Dr. Cooper. Which do you want first? The good news or the bad?" She asked cautiously. Sheldon grimaced, from pain as well as annoyance.

"Good Lord. Just…give it to me." He said, not liking the sound of Vivian's tone.

Vivian clipped the x-rays into the viewer, clicking on the light. Images of Sheldon's leg appeared, and as Leonard peered at the x-ray, Sheldon's injury was hard to miss.

"Okay. Well, it's a clean fracture of the fibula. No blood vessels were damaged, and it wasn't compounded. But you will be off your feet and on crutches for at least four to five weeks. And I would highly recommend physical therapy once the cast is removed." She said seriously.

Sheldon groaned, lobbing his head back against the gurney.

"A cast? Yuck. I don't want one of those germ infested mounds of plaster on my leg. Do you have any _idea_ what a sweaty cesspool of bacteria are swimming around inside those things?" He whined, returning to his previous ire and crossing his arms.

Leonard rolled his eyes, knowing he was never going to hear the end of this.

Vivian sighed as she clicked off the light to the viewer. She turned back around, her eyes meeting Sheldon's. He looked positively awful.

"Would you like me to call Amy?" She asked him, knowing Sheldon would probably function better if his wife were here.

Sheldon nodded, his face suddenly serious. Just the mention of her name made him feel better instantly.

"Yes, but…please don't frighten her. Tell her right off the bat that I'm fine," He begged, and Vivian smiled softly. The love her two friends had for one another was beautiful. Coming over to him, Vivian patted Sheldon on the arm gently.

"You got it, Sheldon. Don't worry, it will be fine. By the way, I'm sending the nurse in with some pain medicine for you. I want you relaxed when we take you down to fit you for your cast," She said, turning to make the call.

As she made to leave, Sheldon noticed she stopped right in front of Raj, and smiled at him.

"Hi, I'm Vivian Ramirez. Have we met?" She asked curiously. Raj's eyes widened at being addressed directed by this heavenly creature. He swallowed visibly before shaking his head in the negative.

"No. I don't think we've ever met. I would have surely remembered that. I'm Rajesh Koothrapalli." He said shyly.

Something clicked in Vivan's brain at that, and she smiled widely.

"Oh! You're the Astrophysicist friend of Sheldon's. Amy and Sheldon have talked about you so much. All good things, I promise," She rushed out, laughing.

Raj stared at the woman, spellbound.

"Um…they seem to have failed to mention_ you_ to _me_." He said, and Vivian smiled.

"They've had a lot on their minds these last few years. Being newlyweds and all," Vivian whispered with a suggestive lilt to her voice.

Raj managed to chuckle, unable to say anything.

"Well...It was good to meet you. I find Astronomy simply fascinating," Vivian said honestly, rewarded with a radiant smile from Raj.

"Likewise," Raj said softly, unable to look away from her. His face twisted in embarrassment before he caught himself. "Oh! I mean likewise, that it was good to meet you, too." He stammered out. Vivian laughed before mimicking Raj's stance and looking down shyly.

Leonard watched the scene unfolding with confusion. Howard with delight. And Sheldon with fascination. In three years of knowing Vivian Ramirez, Sheldon had never once seen her behave _shyly_.

Sheldon rolled his eyes knowingly. Perhaps he wouldn't have to speak to Amy on Raj's behalf, after all.

The next day, Raj asked Vivian out on a date. Two years later, they married in a lavish Hindu ceremony back in India, which Mr. And Mrs. Koothrapalli flew the entire gang over to share in. It was a remarkable twist of fate; Raj was partly responsible for bringing Sheldon and Amy together. And now, they was partly responsible for bringing Vivian into Raj's life.

Time and time _were_ connected, it seemed.

Sheldon remembered back to the last night they all spent at Los Robles, before going their separate ways and leaving the building they had called home for so long. He and Amy were buying a house a few miles away, while Penny and Leonard were renting one.

Although Penny and Leonard lived in 4B, they all filtered into 4A to eat takeout, watch a movie marathon, and in the end, play a game of D&amp;D. The game lasted long into the night, everyone enjoying themselves. They had once again persuaded Howard to be dungeon master, to Sheldon's delight.

It was wonderful having Vivian a part of their group; she blended in effortlessly, even liking Sci-Fi. Everyone realized she was what was missing, and Raj couldn't have been happier.

Where there was once four, there were now eight. Life was complete.

Sheldon had looked around the table at his group of friends and his lovely spouse, a deep smile of gratitude gracing his face. He was no longer lonely, no longer afraid. He still had trouble now and then deciphering sarcasm, and the odd quirk of his would pop up here and there…but he felt that the something he assumed was broken inside of him was finally repaired.

His animosity towards his brother and sister, and especially his father…had softened. He couldn't fault his siblings for their lack of scholastic intelligence. And he no longer felt resentful toward his father for his parent's failings in their marriage. While he was no saint, George Cooper did love his family.

Sheldon realized that he and Amy didn't have to make his parent's mistakes. Or anyone else's, for that matter. Their love story was just that: theirs. He couldn't imagine a life without her now, and he didn't want to.

The day the two couples walked down the stairs for the final time at 2311 Los Robles, had been a difficult one. Sheldon hated change. And no more change was more painful, than that of saying goodbye to those you love. He knew this day was coming; had known it since the day Leonard first moved his belongings into Penny's. And he had comforted himself with the fact they'd have more time together, which they did. Two years had come and gone since he and Amy said 'I do', and in that time, he and his friend still had the time of their lives. It was a happy, content time for Sheldon. He had the best of both worlds; his wife in his bed, and his best friend next door.

But fate was up to her old tricks once again, shaping the lives of everyone in her most mysterious ways.

Amy had surprised Sheldon three months prior with the most amazing news she could ever offer him. She was pregnant with their first child.

Hearing those words leave her lips had rendered him speechless. He had to sit down as the words flowed into his brain.

_Pregnant. She's pregnant. I'm going to be a…father. My child is living inside of Amy. Growing. Together, we created life. Our love created a human being. And not just any human being. One who would no doubt change the world one day. _

After he came back to himself, he gathered Amy into his arms and wept with her. He felt such joy coursing through his body, that he didn't know what to do.

"Are…are you sure?" He questioned, automatically looking down at Amy's stomach. She laughed sweetly, no doubt thinking he was insane for thinking she would show so soon.

"Yes, Sheldon. I'm positive. I did a triple test, and Vivian confirmed it with a blood test. I'm five weeks pregnant," She whispered, and Sheldon thought for certain he would die from happiness.

It was then they had decided to leave this apartment they loved so much. After all, walking up four flights of stairs was going to be difficult for Amy soon. And they really could use more room with a baby on the way.

Now, as the foursome stared at each other by the entrance, no one knew what to say. How could you?

How could you sum up twelve years of friendship, fun, laughter, and tears? For Penny and Amy, it wasn't nearly as long. But for the guys…

"We'll still meet every Monday night for dinner, no matter what. And the rest of the week, we'll play it by ear, okay?" Penny asked, her voice choked with tears.

Amy had stared at her best friend, and Sheldon could see the sadness etched in her eyes. Penny was the first woman to show Amy kindness. It only made sense; she was the love of his best friend's life. They were, in some strange way, all destined to meet and share each other's lives. Sheldon had smiled as he remembered Penny's insistence on his taking Amy on a proper date. She had played a large part in their love story, as well.

The ladies hugged, walking out of the double doors hand in hand. Sheldon watched them go, his eyes turning toward his best friend once they were gone.

"Leonard…" He began, his voice no more than a frail whisper. He had wanted to be strong and brave; he was now a married man, with a baby on the way. But one look at Leonard's face made Sheldon's resolve crumble.

Leonard was struggling with the change, as well. Tears welled up in the shorter Scientist's eyes, and he bit his lip roughly.

"Let's not…say goodbye. Okay, Sheldon? Cause it's not goodbye. We're only moving three miles away from each other. It's just another chapter in our lives. Nothing else is changing, alright?" Leonard reassured him, and for once, Sheldon cocked his head in debate.

He was trying to make it all better for Sheldon, as he always did. Leonard was a good friend. Sheldon felt his heart constrict at how much he loved Leonard like a brother.

"No, Leonard. You're wrong. _Everything_ is changing. But you know what? It's not bad. Change isn't always bad. I see that now. Don't get me wrong; I still think driving down Euclid Avenue is a deathtrap. And I will always insist on my spot being unoccupied. But…I'm not afraid anymore. I think…I know, I was afraid for so long. Of the unknown. You taught me that it's alright to be afraid, but to temper it with courage. Remember the night you lectured me about not giving Amy up?" He asked, his voice softening.

Leonard nodded, remembering that day well. He wasn't sure at the time if his words had gotten through to Sheldon. When Sheldon rushed to the airport the next day to get back his girl, Leonard had breathed a sigh of relief.

"I remember, Sheldon." He said, smiling fondly. Sheldon nodded, smiling as well.

"You told me that there was nothing more important than love. You said, 'We're men of Science, and we know there are mysteries out there that cannot be explained.' You said Amy awakened my heart, mind, and soul. I didn't want to believe you. I was afraid to admit how right you were. Because that would mean that Amy held more control over me than I wanted. I _needed_ that control, Leonard. I always have. But when I went after her, and gave up that control…it was so freeing. Thank you, Leonard. Thank you for everything." He said softly.

Leonard nodded swiftly, not thinking twice before hugging his friend tightly. The two men embraced there in the vestibule, memories bombarding them with happiness and sadness combined.

"Thank _you_, Sheldon. It's been a wonderful ride with you, all these years. I couldn't have asked for a better friend, Buddy." Leonard whispered.

They left the building that had seen so many joys and tears for them quietly, not looking back. The best was yet to come, and they wouldn't be sad. There was nothing to be sad about, anyway.

Five months later, Stephen Albert Cooper was born.

Throughout Amy's pregnancy, Sheldon doted on her relentlessly. As her belly grew to accommodate the growing life inside of her, Sheldon's love and devotion grew as well. She would often find him staring at her, a look of awe on his face.

He watched this Angel; this…perfect creature that had taken his heart, sustain life to his child growing inside of her. He remembered back to their wedding day, and how he had never before felt like such a man. He could honestly say that now, he fully and completely did. He was completely responsible for not just one, but two precious lives.

Some nights, Amy caught him talking to her belly when he thought she was asleep. Tears would roll down her cheeks as he whispered words of love to the baby, or told the baby things he thought it should know.

Like for instance, that J.J. Abrams had taken over the reins of the Star Wars franchise. Or that although he was no longer alive, Leonard Nimoy was the greatest actor that ever lived.

Amy would eventually open her eyes, running her hands through Sheldon's soft hair as his head rested gently on her stomach.

"I love you, Sheldon." She'd whisper, and he would meet her eyes and simply stare at her, overwhelmed.

"I love you, too." He'd whisper back, always kissing her tummy.

They had been eating dinner at The Cheesecake Factory when Amy felt her first contraction. Six hours later, they welcomed their first child into the world.

"Dr. Cooper, meet your son." The Dr. said gently, wrapping the infant in blankets after cleaning and handing him to Sheldon.

There were no words adequate to describe what Sheldon felt in that moment. He gazed at the newborn baby with something akin to rapture. This life…this tiny, gorgeous life, was his _son_.

He had always assumed if he ever became a father, it would be for the chief reason to advance his DNA. He had never entertained the idea of procreating for love, not until Amy. Taking the wee bundle from the Dr.'s gentle hands, Sheldon couldn't fathom how _tiny_ he was. Everything about him was perfect. His little fingers and toes. His little mouth, which already had a perfectly formed pouty bottom lip. And his eyes…almond shaped and blue already.

"Welcome to the world, little lamb." Sheldon whispered, kissing his head as though it were gossamer. He smelled incredible, just like talc. He smelled like…him.

He resembled Sheldon so much already that Sheldon thought he was imagining it.

Tears coursed down Sheldon's face as he held the baby close to his chest, inhaling his fragrance and absorbing his warmth. His eyes met Amy's across the room, hers full of love and exhaustion.

His brave Vixen. He would never be able to repay her for such a gift. He thought becoming his wife was the greatest gift she could have given him. He was so wrong.

"Oh…Amy. I…" He sobbed, bringing the baby over to his wife and settling him in her arms before sitting close to them both on the bed and wrapping his long arms around them tightly. He cried for the fact that his life was so perfect. A joy heretofore not known washed over him. How did he deserve this? And why? What had he done that was so special?

Whatever the reason, he thanked his lucky stars for his fate.

"He's the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen," Amy sobbed, cradling the baby close to her bosom. She kissed his sweet head, her eyes finding her husband's.

"Thank you, Amy. Thank you for this. For…him." Sheldon said sincerely, leaning over to kiss his wife's chapped lips. She was so exhausted. He would have to take extra special care of her from now on.

Amy smiled faintly.

"You're welcome," She whispered, her eyes drifting shut as the exhaustion of the evening overtook her.

Sheldon propped a pillow next to her to support the baby, sitting beside her to keep watch over his two loved ones.

His life was complete. Or so he thought.

For three years later, they would be blessed with another child. A daughter, who would wrap Sheldon around all ten of her chubby little fingers.

Sheldon heard giggling wafting up the stairs, breaking him out of his memories. He stood up, walking to the open doorway and lingering there, listening. The sounds of his wife and children made him happier than he ever imagined he could be, and he smiled.

"Sheldon? We're waiting for you. Dinner is ready." Amy called up, and Sheldon sighed as the delicious aroma of spaghetti and hot dogs assaulted his senses.

"Coming," He said gently, flicking the light off and exiting the room.

His family was waiting.

A/N - Thank you for reading. Epilogue 2 is next. X


	44. Chapter 44

Chapter 44 ~ Epilogue 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

"…Remember we'd always see the end as the enemy, now we know it isn't so. I'm starting to realize you've been giving me good advice, about where we go. And if I ever need you you'll be there…in the end. Like a miracle, a miracle. Maybe when we leave it's a rise and not a fall. Is it possible? It seems so real. I'm sure that I can see the stars in your eyes…" KT Tunstall – Miracle

_Two years later…_

Sheldon had felt strange all day.

It was subtle. But nevertheless it was there, in the way his mind kept wandering. He hadn't had such a difficult time concentrating in years.

This morning was a meeting of Dept. heads, and as Dean of Physics, it was his responsibility to organize and lead the discussion. What was normally a cakewalk for him became an exercise in torture. Focusing on the task at hand was nearly impossible as he kept straying off topic.

He was relieved when his presentation was over and the next Dean took over to present. Returning to his seat, he kept his eyes focused on the paperwork in front of him. He had no desire to meet the eyes of anyone and see the questions there. He was sure his scatterbrained behavior was puzzling more than a few people in the conference room. After all, it was puzzling _him_.

Five years after he and Amy married, Sheldon was promoted to Dean of Physics at Caltech. He had decided to take a more active role in teaching, using his supreme expertise to shape the up and coming minds of tomorrow.

When President Siebert approached him with the opportunity to be in the running, the first thing he did was ask Amy what her opinion was. As she had always done, she supported him and encouraged him without fail. She told him that while his research was important, passing on his knowledge to others was a gift to be shared.

Sheldon relented that he wished at the time of realizing his capacity for Physics, that there was a teacher as knowledgeable as himself to impart information he needed to know. Amy was right, as she always was.

He also knew the time was coming where he would have to secure a more stable future for himself and Amy. They had two year old Stephen by then. Even though between the both of them they made a comfortable living, if they wanted another child and wanted to put them both through college, it would take a greater salary quotient. Not only would he garner more respect with this position, but the pay increase would ensure a much cushier life for them.

He had been shocked that he was even being considered for such a position. He had only just been promoted to full time Professor two years prior, and he wasn't even tenured. President Siebert told him that, off the record, he was the most qualified for the position. He had long since thought Sheldon had talents few could match, but his pride and his ego had held him back. He as well as the Board had been watching Sheldon's progress for years, and felt he was a suitable candidate.

He had excelled at teaching with practice, and no longer felt it to be an albatross around his neck. He hadn't given up his research, though. He still found time to conduct studies, write papers, and do experiments.

When his name had been announced that he won the promotion, he felt a strange sense of accomplishment come over him. He was no stranger to success. Yet he felt deep down that this was something he truly _earned_. And not just by having a high IQ. He earned it, by proving himself. That was a good feeling, and one he found he quickly became addicted to.

"Dr. Cooper? The meeting is over."

Sheldon looked up, startled to see his assistant Elaine standing over him, a concerned expression upon her face. He tried to gather his wits, standing up hastily and placing his paperwork inside his briefcase.

"Thank you, Elaine. Did everyone leave?" He asked needlessly, looking around the now empty room.

Elaine nodded, her eyes following his.

"Yes, Sir. Dr. Cooper…are you alright? You seem a bit distracted today. Are you unwell?" Elaine asked kindly, and Sheldon shook his head to dispel her worries.

"I'm fine, Elaine. Thank you. I'll be in my office. Please have the Physics 101 exams on my desk for grading by the end of the day." He said briskly, his shaky voice betraying his animated motions.

Elaine nodded as she watched her boss retreat, certain something was off. In five years working for the Dean, she had never seen him so uncharacteristically distracted. She left the conference room as well, shutting off the light and closing the door.

Back in his office, he found he couldn't get any work done there, either. Standing up, he paced around his desk in a circle, rubbing out some knots in his neck that he just noticed were there.

"I need a cup of tea," He murmured, thinking he should go to the cafeteria and procure a soothing hot beverage. Perhaps he hadn't slept well last night, and his fatigue was catching up with him.

In years past, when faced with a dilemma at work, Sheldon would head across campus to his wife's lab. Sometimes he'd bring a snack, sometimes just himself. Once, he surprised her with a single sunflower. Popping his head in, he caught the delighted look in her eyes when they fixed upon first the flower, and then him. Those were happy days, when Amy was so close by. He treasured them.

He longed to see his wife now, if only for a moment. But she was no longer there.

His brilliant, wonderful wife had been promoted herself last year. Her former employer, UCLA, had offered Amy a position to teach as a Senior Professor in Neurobiology. As her grant with Caltech had run its course, and she decided not to find another investor, it was the most logical solution.

Amy loved teaching and lecturing. As much as she enjoyed research, she jumped at the chance to be able to balance a more comfortable life due to having two children. Sheldon was so proud of her. She also had more time to focus on writing. Two more articles of hers had been published in Neuron magazine. Sheldon joked she should give up teaching altogether and become a full time writer.

He smiled faintly now as he recalled her sassy words during that conversation.

"_Oh, I should. Perhaps I should focus entirely on my Cooper/Amelia fanfiction?"_ She had questioned him, one brow quirked in question.

They were in her lab at the time, packing up her personal items. Sheldon looked around to make sure no one was around before he came over to her, bending down to whisper in her ear huskily.

"_Are you trying to kill me, Dr. Cooper?"_ He had whispered, delighted when he felt his wife shiver.

He had read all of her exploits involving The Time Traveling Physicist Cooper and farm girl Amelia. Her words had simultaneously shocked and aroused him, making him blush so profusely that he was glad to have been alone.

It was more than simply the words. It was the feelings_ behind_ them. Amy had felt that way for years; imagining them in scenarios of passion and love which he himself had denied her for so long. The fact she longed for those things in such detail moved him. He had wasted so much time being afraid. But then he supposed, if he had rushed things he might have made an even bigger fiasco of their situation.

No…they moved at their own pace. And he would never trade any of their time together, or what it took to get them to the place they now were.

"_Of course not, Dr. Cooper."_ She had replied innocently, answering his earlier question and giving him a sideways glance. She had sauntered up to her door, closing it and turning the lock. Sheldon had watched her actions, wide eyed, at first not understanding her intent. But when she turned around and began to unbutton her blouse, her intent became loud and clear.

"_Amy…that's not a wise course of action_," He had murmured, his eyes never straying from hers as she moved closer. His wife smiled seductively at him, lowering another button.

"_Oh? Are you sure? I think it's just what the Dr. ordered."_ She said, purposely using his title. Sheldon groaned and backed up against the wall.

Vixen. He was going to have to use logic now. Surely his brilliant wife could see reason.

"_Well…while you are no longer an employee of this institution as of 5:00 pm today, I still am. And this Dr. would prefer not to be caught in flagrante delicto at my place of work."_ He choked out, his voice trembling.

Amy had already unbuttoned four buttons, her pink lace bra now visible as she continued. Sheldon gulped noisily. He could tell his words stirred Amy by the way her eyes dilated. She tilted her head, her eyes burning a hole into his.

"_Ooh…Dr. Cooper. Talk dirty to me_," She had whispered, sidling up to her husband and leaning up on her tip toes to bite his earlobe. _"I just love it when you speak Latin."_

Sheldon knew he was losing the battle as Amy slid her hand down his chest until it reached his belt buckle.

_What on Earth was she thinking_? He had wondered. But he quickly pushed away any rational thoughts as Amy's fingers unlatched the belt, lowered his zipper and and slid her hand inside.

"_Amy…"_ He had warned, his voice quiet and chastising yet it held a hint of longing. It was that hint that made Amy bold.

"_I indigere pectore. Nunc."_ She whispered throatily, her hands wrapped around Sheldon's prominent manhood. He moaned quietly into her hair.

"_Please,"_ He had murmured, surrendering to her touch. Amy kissed his neck lovingly.

"_Oh, Dr. Cooper…you never have to beg."_ She promised, pulling his head down and kissing him soundly.

Coming back to himself, Sheldon shook away the memory of what followed. It wouldn't do to be distracted _and_ have an erection at work. But that memory was one he cherished. His professional, sensible wife had pushed him down on her former desk and had her wicked way with him. Right there, in the lab.

For weeks, he worried that security had caught the entire incident on tape. No one said anything to him, nor did he receive any correspondence alluding to his inappropriate behavior. He smiled to himself, missing Amy in that moment so much that his chest ached. He couldn't wait to get home tonight and see her.

In the years they'd been married, his passion for her had never waned. He found himself longing for her touch at the strangest times and without conscious thought. It took him years to surrender his will and accept the fact he was not the Homo Novus he once assumed he was. He had joined the ranks of the rattled masses, led by hormone fueled thoughts of lust and passion.

And not once had his intellect ever suffered because of it.

What a fool he had been, to deny himself as well as Amy such an integral part of their relationship. But they had made up for lost time all of these years. And then some.

Sheldon returned to his desk, putting his memories aside and once again, tried to focus on getting some work done.

Something kept distracting him, and it took him another hour to figure out what it was…

Wind chimes.

Though his office was now down the corridor from where his old office was, he was still on the same floor as the rest of the Physics Department. Those blasted wind chimes outside that Professor Davenport never took down were still swaying in the breeze. They kept playing a haunting tune that made his blood run cold. He never liked the sound and today, he felt overwhelmed by the dislike.

The only person he knew that was fond of wind chimes except for his University neighbor was Meemaw. He thought of that large set hung on her old tree in the front yard, and the way she loved them because Pop-Pop put them there for her. Sitting back in his chair, he closed his eyes.

He had taken Amy and the children back home to Texas for spring break a few months ago to see the family. Meemaw had insisted they stay with her, citing more room and closer proximity to the beach. Mary hemmed and hawed, but gave in at the end when Amy promised they would bring the children around her place every day.

It was the best vacation they had ever shared. He reveled in watching his beloved grandmother sit on the sofa with his children, telling them tales of childhood and making them laugh. Sheldon had walked out onto the porch one morning, to find Meemaw, Stephen, Ellie, and Amy sitting on the cool grass drinking lemonade and blowing bubbles. He sat down on one of the rocking chairs, unnoticed, silently watching the most important people in his life.

How had he ever gotten so lucky?

Thinking back fifteen years, even twenty…his life seemed like it belonged to someone else. His wants and needs had changed so much over the years. He had grown. Evolved. And that was where the crux of the matter lay.

He_ was_ different.

Why had he feared change before? He, of all people, who believed steadfastly in evolution? He smiled to himself as he pictured the old him, stomping his foot at some injustice he couldn't control. Now, every thought and action was with the concern for someone else. The old, selfish Sheldon was gone. He was still very much himself in particulars, though; a thought which made him smile. He didn't have to give up who he was to make others happy. He simply had to accommodate them into his life. Everything else just fell into place.

"Oh, how the mighty fell," He whispered to himself, chuckling wryly.

Just then, Amy sat up on the blanket, spotting her husband's covert spying and waved him over. He went gladly, bounding down the steps as quickly as he could to reach his family.

It was a wonderful time for him, Amy, and the children.

Tears sprang to Sheldon's eyes as he shook himself free of the tender memory, taking off his newly acquired reading glasses and dropping them to the desk gently. Turning 47 recently had brought to light the fact that Sheldon's previously 20/20 vision had faltered. He rubbed his weary eyes, certain he was feeling the stirrings of a headache coming on.

What in heaven's name was _wrong_ with him today? Perhaps he should just go home and get some rest. It was Friday, and it had been a long week. He was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with Amy and the children tonight, and tomorrow he and the guys were having a long overdue outing of paintball. It would be wonderful to engage in man talk again; they hadn't done anything just the four of them in over two months.

Packing up his belongings, he stopped by Elaine's outer office to inform her that he was leaving early and to text him with any questions. The woman smiled, nodding.

"Alright, Dr. Cooper. Have a nice weekend," She said kindly, watching him go.

"Thank you. You as well," He answered, happy to get out of there. He felt as though he were being smothered.

He drove home in silence, not bothering to put the radio on. He'd long since gotten over his fear of driving a car; Amy bought him the safest car she could find for his fortieth birthday - A Volvo. Becoming a father had given him new purpose, both as a man and as a provider. He couldn't expect Amy to shoulder the burden of driving anymore.

Amy teased him at the time that the safest vehicle in his eyes would be a Sherman tank. But she was proud of her husband for overcoming his fear of driving, nevertheless.

He found at times driving to even be therapeutic. It helped to clear his mind of everything else as he focused on the road. Yet today, his thoughts were scattered and he hated driving in such a state.

Grateful for making it home in one piece he turned off the engine and sat in his car, staring at his house from the driveway. It was so good to be home.

Sheldon opened the door quietly, surprised to see his wife standing in the foyer. She was home early as well, it seemed; much earlier than normal.

"Amy! You startled me," He said sweetly, letting out a deep breath of relief. She had been running through his disjointed mind all day, and it was wonderful to finally see her.

He smiled when their eyes met, but the smile quickly vanished as he took in her appearance. Her eyes looked dark and pained, and her face pale as milk. He never put much stock in ESP before, but in the years he and Amy were together, they had grown in sync like yin and yang. He did not like the way his wife looked now, nor did he like his reaction to it. A deep fear spread through his limbs as she continued to gaze at him with a glassy eyed expression. Sheldon swallowed thickly.

"Amy? What's wrong?" He asked immediately, dropping his briefcase by the door and coming to her at once. He grasped her hands in his own. Hers were ice cold, and he unconsciously tried to warm them.

Amy opened and closed her mouth once, and ice ran up Sheldon's back.

"Is it the children?" He asked frantically, tugging her along with him to move. Amy shook her head in the negative, taking a deep breath.

"No. The children are fine, Sweetheart. They're fine," She reassured him, her voice thin and frail.

Sheldon nodded woodenly, overwhelmed with relief. Something was wrong, though. Something was _very_ wrong.

"Amy…what is it? Please tell me." He implored, and the blue of his eyes seemed to darken as Amy looked into them.

"Oh…Sheldon. I…" She struggled, only adding to Sheldon's fear. She closed her eyes momentarily, trying to gather her courage. When their gazes locked again, Sheldon just knew. The compassion in her eyes was impossible to miss.

_Hold onto yourself, Sheldon. This is going to hurt like hell._

"Amy…no." He whispered, his voice trembling. She could do nothing but nod shakily, the tears she'd held at bay for the last hour finally bursting forth in a torrent.

He could not hear this. It wasn't real. If he didn't acknowledge it, then it couldn't be real.

Right?

His legs gave way beneath him, and he stumbled to the floor, still holding tight to Amy's hands. She fell to the ground with him, scooting up and sitting between his legs.

"I'm so sorry. Mary called. Meemaw…she was gardening. And…the neighbor across the way found her. It was a stroke. The paramedics said it happened very fast. She probably didn't…didn't feel a thing." Amy sobbed, laying her head on her husband's chest. She threw her arms around Sheldon, holding him tightly to her.

Sheldon closed his eyes, already feeling disconnected from his body. Once again, as in a hospital room thirteen years prior, he felt like a helium balloon that was going to float away. Only this time, the tether which held him fast to the earth was not lying in a hospital bed half dead, but right here. Holding him close and whispering words of love and support.

Wrapping his arms around his wife, Sheldon leaned his head on her shoulder buried his face into her fragrant, comforting hair. The smell soothed him. Grounded him.

He was 4 years old again, sitting on Meemaw's lawn sharing a picnic with her and Pop-Pop. The day was sunny, but unseasonably cool. They had fried chicken, potato salad, and corn on the cob. Sheldon scribbled an equation on Meemaw's linen napkin, and instead of scolding him, she laughed in delight. To this day, the framed napkin resided in her bedroom on the wall.

That was his Meemaw. Always supportive, always his biggest cheerleader. She was so proud of him. She was always…so damn proud of him.

No wonder he felt so terribly off today. He knew something was wrong. Had felt it since awakening.

A huge paradigm shift had taken place. This world no longer held the Spirit of someone so pure and beautiful. Sheldon suddenly felt so bereft, so cold…

"Meemaw…" He sobbed, unable to comprehend the grief that was threatening to smother him whole.

Amy only held him tighter, refusing to let even an inch of space between them. Climbing on his lap, she held him close and kissed his face over and over. She whispered words of comfort and love, cradling him to her.

He would never understand the bond that connected them; the deep, nourishing love that kept him sane. Thank God for her.

Thank God for Amy.

Summertime in Galveston was brutal. The only saving grace from the heat and humidity was the brisk Gulf breezes that seemed to flow in like a reprieve from the gods.

On this particular day, though, there was no sun. Dark, stormy clouds had engulfed the area, pummeling the city streets with their weighty contents.

Nobody cared about that, though. It was only fitting, anyway. Such a somber day was not meant to be bright and cheerful. It would almost seem disrespectful.

The church was filled to capacity; friends and family alike giving their last goodbyes to such a special woman. Everyone in Sheldon and Amy's circle had come to the funeral, to which they were so grateful.

Sheldon twisted the speech in his hand as he made his way to the pulpit. It was an unnecessary prop anyway; he had memorized his speech, of course. But something about holding the paper in his hands was a tangible grounding tool. Looking out over the sea of faces who were there to bid their final goodbye to his grandmother was a soothing balm to his soul. She was much loved, that was crystal clear.

Sheldon's eyes met Amy's for a brief moment, and the love he saw there gave him strength.

"Good morning, family and friends. My name is Sheldon Lee Cooper. We're here today, to pay honor and tribute to a remarkable and beautiful woman. Clara Elizabeth Hollings Buchannan. My Meemaw," Sheldon said brokenly, closing his eyes for a brief moment to gather himself together. He had to do this, for her.

"No grandson is prouder to call himself kin with such an exceptional human being. Clara was…Exemplary. She had a heart as big as the state of Texas, with a wit and charm to match. Everyone who knew her was captivated by her. She was a true Southern Belle, full of graciousness and hospitality.

I learned from a very young age, just how special she was. There was a light in her that shone bright and true. I loved her so much that sometimes…I wondered if we were like kindred spirits.

My grandmother held a master's degree in teaching. She gave up her dream to start a family with my Pop-Pop. She was smart as a whip, and I think I inherited my intelligence from her. She supported me, comforted me, and pushed me, all of the days of my life. I can't say I loved her more than anyone. That wouldn't be fair to my wife and children. But we shared a special bond, Meemaw and I." He said softly, his eyes straying to his wife who was seated in the front row. Amy offered him a watery smile, her lips trembling. Stephen and Ellie were on either side of her, their eyes wet and lost.

Sheldon felt sorry for his babies, that they would not grow up to further enjoy the love of such a woman. It hit him suddenly that the last time they saw her, during spring break, was to be their final memory of her. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he relived how beautiful a time it had been, and what a gift for his children to hold as their last thoughts of her.

Sheldon swallowed, before clearing his throat.

"The day I realized that I was going to propose to my wife Amy, I had gone to see my Meemaw. She took one look at me, and knew what was going through my mind. She presented me with her engagement ring, which my Pop-Pop picked out for her nearly 70 years ago. I once told Amy, that by wearing that ring, my grandparents were bound to us forever. I still believe that. Meemaw loved Amy. Meemaw loved…everyone. And everyone who knew her, loved her in return.

Every beautiful memory I have of her is a gift. She enriched my life in ways I have only now begun to understand. I owe her so much…To know she lived long enough to meet my children and enrich their own lives, is a gift I will forever cherish. Every time I eat cookies, I will feel Meemaw. Every time I hear wind chimes…I will hear her laugh. That incredible laugh, and untouchable grace is no longer here amongst us. When I think of saying goodbye…the notion is just impossible. How can you say goodbye to such a person? Such a force of nature? You can't. So I won't. This isn't goodbye. This is so long. Every time I hear my children laugh, I will hear her voice. Every time I see my wife smile…I will remember my grandparents and their amazing love story. And I will smile too. Knowing I was blessed with my own love story, which she played a big part of. We are particles of energy. Our life force never really dies; it just gets transformed. But if there is a Heaven…if by some magical chance that I and the rest of the Scientists got it wrong…then she is there. No other person is as deserving of such a bestowment. I will honor her memory always. I will see to it that my children, and their children do as well. I love you, Meemaw. That will never change. I hope I continue making you proud of me. Rest in peace," He sobbed, coming down from the pulpit and laying his hand upon her closed casket which was adorned with her favorite flowers.

Yellow roses. Dozens and dozens of the perfect buds, covering her in majesty.

Sheldon smiled sadly, the words of The Yellow Rose of Texas going through his mind. A memory came to him then in an instant; his Pop-Pop playing the song on his harmonica as Meemaw danced around her kitchen like a pro. She was a pure light in an otherwise dark world. He hoped that her Spirit was at peace. The thought of her not being somewhere beautiful right now was too devastating to imagine.

Sheldon walked by his mother on the way back to his place next to Amy, stopping before her and kneeling down. Mother and son stared at each other, grief stricken. Mary took his hands, squeezing tightly. Sheldon may have lost his grandmother, but Mary lost her mother. The pain for her must have been deep. His heart clenched with the fact that he and his siblings would one day lose Mary the same way Mary lost Clara.

Suddenly, Sheldon felt helpless. This life was fleeting; our time here so short. He remembered Arthur's words now as he often did.

Appreciate them.

Sheldon reached out, engulfing his mother in a hug. While hugging was something Sheldon wasn't opposed to with his mother, over the years, they really hadn't done it. Mary sat surprised as Sheldon tightened his grip, his love and grief and support flowing through his body into hers. Mary hugged her son back just as tightly, patting his head like she did when he was a boy.

"There, there baby. We'll be alright." Mary whispered, her voice strong and clear.

The church was silent as first George Jr., and then Missy got up to wrap their arms around their mother and brother. There wasn't a dry eye in the church as the four Cooper's closest to Meemaw wept together for the loss of a woman who loved them more than anything.

Any cried quietly, holding both Stephen and Ellie close. Penny leaned over from behind, patting Amy's back gently.

Yes…if there was a Heaven, Meemaw was certainly there. Sheldon felt better knowing that someone as loving as her was on the other side, standing watch.

At least, for now, he believed that.

Later that evening, Amy put the children to bed and made her way downstairs to the living room. She quietly padded down the stairs, peeking in on Sheldon to make sure she wasn't disturbing him. He had been stoic since arriving home this afternoon, and barely ate anything at dinner.

She knew he was processing this grief in his own way. She was surprised he was doing so well. But she knew her husband better than anyone; she was on high alert for if and when the dam would break.

Mary, George, and Missy had come by earlier, Amy trying to comfort them as best she could. The whole family was feeling this loss, and Amy knew they would for a long time to come. For as much as everyone loved Clara, it was Sheldon who had the tightest bond with her.

Sheldon was sitting on the couch ramrod straight, arms folded across his chest with one hand supporting his forehead. He looked exhausted, and lost in his thoughts. As Amy neared him, his head shot up and he fixed her with a glassy eyed stare. The look on his face broke her heart, and she caught her breath. For several moments they stayed in the positions they were in, at a loss of what to say.

Sheldon felt like his emotions were all over the place. He didn't want to snap at her unnecessarily, an Amy didn't want to set him off in his fragile state. In the end, they both realized they needed each other.

Sheldon reached out with his hand toward his wife, and Amy closed the distance, taking his hand gently.

"Are the children asleep?" Sheldon asked quietly. Amy nodded, coming and sitting beside Sheldon on the couch. She tightened her grip on his hand.

"Yes, finally. Ellie cried herself to sleep, poor baby. She doesn't understand completely what's happened. She said she knows Meemaw isn't here anymore, but I don't think she truly comprehends what that means. Stephen stopped crying a little while ago. He said he had to be strong for his daddy," Amy said, her voice breaking. Sheldon's façade cracked, and he bit his lip harshly.

Sheldon didn't know what he would do without his wife and children beside him now. Their love and strength were the only things holding him together. He turned and looked at his lovely, exhausted wife, noting the dark circles under her eyes. She had taken this tragedy hard, as well.

"Are you alright, Amy? Did you sleep enough last night?" He asked her tenderly, worried for her health. Tears filled her eyes as she reached over and kissed him softly.

"I'm fine, Sheldon. Right now, I'm more concerned with you and the children," She said honestly, and Sheldon nodded woodenly.

"I'll speak with Stephen and Ellie tomorrow. We'll have to give them both extra attention right now, so they know everything will be alright." Sheldon said, and Amy knew he was trying to convince himself, as well.

Amy took the hand she still held, kissing Sheldon's knuckles with tenderness. Her brave, wonderful husband. She wished more than anything that she could take away his pain. But the only thing she could do, was offer him her comfort.

"We'll talk to them together. They'll be fine, Sheldon. They know she was very old, and very happy. They had good times with her in such a short period. I know Meemaw was very happy about that. She not only got to see her grandchildren grow up, but have children of their own. She lived a wonderful, full life. Full of love." Amy comforted, her tears now beginning to fall faster. While Amy knew this was truth, the pain of losing such a cherished family member was difficult, all the same.

Sheldon squeezed her hand, unable to answer. After a moment, he released a deep sigh.

"I know," He whispered. He sounded like what ten year old Sheldon must have sounded like.

Amy nodded, looking around the room wistfully. She remembered the first time she came here, the week before their wedding. Walking into this living room, she could feel the love surrounding her. Meemaw's Spirit was still here. Amy was sure of it. And being a Scientist who did not believe in the supernatural could not dispel that feeling.

Amy snuggled closer to Sheldon, wiping some dried tears on his cheeks.

"Your eulogy today was just…beautiful. She would be so very proud of you," Amy whispered, kissing Sheldon's neck lovingly. Sheldon turned his face into hers, gathering strength from his wife.

"I had to honor her. She deserves nothing but the best. I feel like…I didn't do her justice," Sheldon sobbed, his resolve beginning to falter. Amy reached over, cradling his head to her bosom. She stroked his hair gently, unsurprised when he let the floodgates open and the tears flowed freely.

"Oh, Sheldon. No. You know that isn't true. You loved her more than anyone. You did a magnificent job today. She loved you so much. You honor her with every breath that you take," Amy said forcefully.

Sheldon sobbed loudly, clutching his wife around her back.

"How can I go on without her, Amy?" He cried softly, shudders wracking his body. He clutched Amy tighter, fearing he was going to fall apart. He hadn't felt this lost since the day Amy almost died. "Her wisdom, her advice…all gone now. She'll never…never call me Moonpie again," He wailed, his tortured cries ripping Amy's heart to shreds.

Amy swallowed, tears clogging her throat.

"I don't know, Sweetheart. I honestly don't know. I'm not going to offer you a bunch of clichés. I know what she meant to you, and I know how hard this is going to be. I don't know _how_ you'll go on, but I know with _whom_. Stephen, Ellie, and I. We will be your strength. And you_ will_ go on. You will be alright. Because you know Meemaw would never want you to grieve for her. She adored you. And she will always be right here," Amy promised, laying her hand softly upon Sheldon's heart.

Sheldon nodded rapidly, letting go of all of his grief and surrendering. Amy held him tightly, cradling him and rocking him and whispering words of love in his ears. He cried and cried until he was spent. She held him long into the night, until they both fell into an exhausted sleep wrapped around each other on the couch.

Sheldon and Amy stared at Clara's attorney in shock.

"I'm sorry. Could you repeat that?" Sheldon whispered after he once again found his voice.

The man sighed, holding up the legal document and once again repeating the decree written there.

"I hereby bequest my ancestral home at 7577 Stargazer Lane in Galveston, Texas to my grandson. Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper and his wife Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler-Cooper."

Amy gasped as her eyes met her husband's in shock.

"She…she left me her home? Where she grew up?" Sheldon reiterated numbly.

The man nodded sternly.

"Yes, Sir. And the land which it sits on."

"But…I assumed…" Sheldon trailed off, and the attorney raised a brow to Sheldon in question to continue.

"You assumed?" He followed, and Sheldon swallowed. Gathering himself, he looked at Amy for some clue as to how to proceed. At the moment, she looked as lost as he did.

"I assumed, the house would be sold and the money divided between our family." Sheldon stated, waiting for the attorney to say that he was mistaken before, and Sheldon's idea was the original plan. But no such scenario was happening. The attorney, Mr. Brooks, took off his glasses and fixed his hands into a steeple on the desk.

"No, Sheldon. Clara was always very clear about the ultimate fate of her home. I've been her attorney for thirty years. And in all of that time, even when you were a child, it was Clara's wish that you would one day own that home and the land as well. All totaled, its five acres." Mr. Brooks said with seriousness, producing a legal sized letter from his folder. "If you decide to sell it, you should get a good price. The last appraisal five years ago valued the house and property at 1.5 million dollars. This should clear up any confusion you may have. Your grandmother wrote you a letter, which I notarized twelve years ago, when you and Mrs. Cooper were married. Clara was very specific that if I was still her attorney, it was my job to deliver this letter to you alone, and in person."

Sheldon stared at the proffered letter for a moment, before accepting it with shaking hands. He looked over at Amy, whose face was clearly etched in surprise.

"Shall I read it aloud?" He asked his wife numbly, and Amy swallowed.

"If you wish." She said gently, and Sheldon nodded.

He tore the envelope carefully, unearthing a single page. It was definitely her impeccable handwriting; curvy and elegant, with enough flourish to light up Texas. Sheldon smiled sadly, closing his eyes as he gathered his courage.

_Dearest Sheldon, I guess it's time to do the right thing, and make sure my ducks are in order. I feel the weight of time bearing down upon me these days, Moonpie…I am almost eighty years old now. My time here upon this rock is drawing to a close. Sooner, rather than later now. But I am alright with that, Sheldon. And I don't want you to fret none about me. _

_When you receive this, it will because I have passed. My only fear is for you, Moonpie. Please…stay the course and do not let grief overwhelm you. You are a Scientist. I leave it to you to remember that this is the ebb and flow of life. I will miss you, my love. And I know you will miss me. Promise me, that you will be strong. You have made me so happy and so proud. To witness you marrying Amy was the highlight of my life. I am secure now in the fact you will be alright. As your future is secure, I want you to be secure in something else._

_It is my wish that you and Amy are left this house._

_I know you love this house. I think a part of your soul has always resided here. I know George is the oldest, and Missy lives here in Texas, but…you are the grandchild that this house belongs to. Places hold us, Shelly. This place holds you. I knew it when you were a child; the light in your eyes when you'd pull up and see the house from the yard. I will tell you a secret: when you were a little boy, I would secretly wish that one day you would live here with your own wife, and raise a family. If you and Amy want to move in here, it would make me very happy. If you want to just hold onto the place, that's fine too. It's yours to do with as you will. I couldn't bear the idea of giving this house away to anyone but you. _

_I see so much of Pop-Pop and I in you and Amy. I will be eternally grateful to that beautiful woman for loving my Moonpie so thoroughly. She has a light in her that you can see for miles. It is only fitting that such a woman be the one to take my place in that house._

_I don't want you to cry for me, Sheldon. I lived a long, happy life. I loved more deeply than most. But you know that, don't you? To share that kind of love with someone is rare. You take after me in that, as well. I never want you to take love for granted. You are the man I always knew you'd be. A loving grandson and son, a dear brother, and a magnificent husband and father. I am so proud of you. Reach for the stars, my child. And if you are ever blessed with that Nobel award you want so badly, don't forget your Meemaw in your acceptance speech. I will be telling all of Heaven about you. I love you so much._

_Always, Meemaw._

Sheldon folded the letter with the utmost care, putting it back inside the envelope and securing it in his jackets inside pocket. Hot tears rolled down his face as he was utterly speechless. Beside him, Amy cried silently, her hands folded primly in her lap. He turned to his wife, the love they had for each other connecting them immediately.

"Amy…" He began, not sure how to voice his thoughts. But as she did with everything, Amy made it better.

"Do you want to live here, Sheldon? In Meemaw's house? Because if you do, then we will." She said with resolute certainty.

Sheldon stared at his wife blankly a moment, stunned. She was a noted Scientist. Why would she want to move out here to Galveston? Why, for that matter, would he? Their entire life was in Pasadena.

Mr. Brooks, sensing the weight of the conversation, quietly excused himself to give the couple privacy. Once the door was closed, Sheldon faced Amy head on.

"You would give up our life in California to live here? Pasadena is our home, Amy." He said quietly. Amy nodded, swallowing.

"Yes, but…it's just a city, Sheldon. Home, a _real_ home…is where you hang your hat."

Sheldon narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"Yes, but…_move_ here? And…do _what_?" He questioned hesitantly, not knowing the answer to that himself. Amy shrugged.

"I don't know. But as it showed you 11 years ago when you found out you were in possession of my bottle, life sometimes gives you options that you never expected. The children are young enough to relocate without too much upheaval. You can get a position out here at Texas A&amp;M. So could I. We have…choices. I know you love that house. And by living there, you would always have a piece of Meemaw with you. Just…think about it." She implored, her tears not ceasing.

Sheldon gazed at his wife, dumbstruck. How could she love him enough to uproot her life, move away from her own mother and step-father who lived close by? While true, moving to Galveston, they would be surrounded by Sheldon's family…they would lose their friends. The choice seemed unbearable to make right now. Leonard, Penny…everyone.

And yet…the idea of living in the grand old house, with the white picket fence and a lifetime of happy memories…

Sheldon gasped, rubbing his eyes.

"I don't…I can't make this decision right now, Amy." He admitted, and Amy nodded.

"Hey. Calm down, Sweetheart. It's alright. You don't have to make the decision now. You own the house. That's all. The rest, we can figure out, okay?" She whispered tenderly.

Sheldon smiled, feeling the weight of grief lift from his heart momentarily. Amy was here beside him. The rest would work out.

"Okay," He whispered, leaning his forehead against her own.

Later that evening, Sheldon and Amy sat the children down in the living room after dinner. They sat on the couch side by side, Stephen on Sheldon's lap and Ellie on Amy's.

"Meemaw loved you both very much. You know that, right?" Sheldon asked them, his eyes darting between his two children.

Stephen nodded, his eyes filling with tears and his lower lip trembling.

"I know, Daddy. Mommy told us she was very old, and it was just her time to go. But we'll miss her." He said sadly, trying to be brave.

Sheldon tenderly ruffled his son's hair. He looked deeply into his eyes, his own eyes. So blue, and so full of grief.

"Oh, Stephen…I know. Trust me when I say, no one will miss her more than I. She and I were…best friends. Just the thought that she won't be here to see you both grow up, is very hard." Sheldon admitted, smiling tremulously.

Ellie bit her lip, reaching out her tiny hand to stroke her father's cheek.

"Don't cry, Daddy." Ellie whispered, and Sheldon's tears fell faster at his daughter's sweet request.

"I'm trying not to, Sweetheart. Sometimes…crying is good. It helps you deal with the sadness. I want you to know, you both did nothing wrong. Mommy and I love you both, and we're here for you. Okay?" Sheldon asked softly, his earnest gaze settled on his son's.

"Will we move here now, and live in Meemaws house?" Stephen asked innocently, his eyes meeting his father's. Sheldon smiled, and looked at his wife.

"Someday, yes. Would that be alright?" He asked his family. Amy nodded, and Ellie clapped her hands.

"I think it would be nice to live in Texas. Someday," Stephen whispered.

Sheldon chuckled, despite his tears. He thought back to a time when he couldn't wait to escape this place. Yet some of his happiest memories were spent right here, under this roof. He had a lot to consider, undertaking such a change. Amy as well. But he remembered Amy's words from earlier, and felt somewhat calmer.

_Home is where you hang your hat._

"Yeah. It would be nice." He said quietly, meeting Amy's eyes. His wife gave him an encouraging smile.

"Someday."

It was on a morning the following October that it happened.

Sheldon found himself running late. And for Sheldon Cooper, that was an anomaly.

Since Meemaws death, things had been slow to get back to normal. True to her word, Amy and the children were a great source of strength for Sheldon. They hadn't yet decided whether or not they would move into Clara's house, but the idea was teasing the back of Sheldon's mind daily.

His family wasn't resentful of the turn of events; they knew the strong bond Sheldon and Clara shared, and knew what her wishes were all along. Selfishly, Mary hoped that Sheldon and Amy would move back to Texas, so she could have her whole family together again.

Sheldon and Amy decided that within the year, they would make a decision. The last few months had been hectic, and this day was no exception.

Sheldon flew out the door, Stephen and Ellie in tow.

Amy had to leave earlier than normal to welcome a guest speaker at UCLA, leaving Sheldon the task of chauffeuring the children to school. He piled Stephen and Ellie into his Volvo XC90, balancing a travel mug of tea on the roof.

"Did you remember to print your book report on the Peloponnesian War?" Sheldon asked Stephen as he snapped Ellie into her car seat and gave her bangs a soft tug. She smiled a toothy grin at her father, and Sheldon winked at his girl.

"I did, Daddy. I even added another five hundred words this morning. I know for a fact this paper will earn an A+." Stephen answered proudly. Sheldon nodded in approval, holding up his palm for a high five.

"I don't know why I even asked." Sheldon said, equally proudly. His son was definitely a chip off the old block academically. While he wasn't as perfect in mathematics as Sheldon himself, he was a straight A student who excelled in Science. At the age of nine, Stephen was already talking about being a Dr. A _medical _Dr. The joy it brought Sheldon to be able to see his son so accomplished couldn't be measured. He was certain that once older, Ellie would be just as successful. His daughter was already an accomplished ballerina at the age of 6. It was no wonder to Sheldon; he was an excellent dancer himself. It only served to reason his offspring would be, as well.

He slammed Ellie's door shut, grabbing his mug before hopping in the driver's side and looking in the rearview mirror to check that Stephen was buckled in, as well. Luckily the drive wasn't gridlock, and he was able to get the children to school on time.

"Mommy will pick you up today, alright? I love you both and I hope you have a good day. Make me proud," Sheldon said, helping the children out of the car and slamming the door behind them.

"Love you, Daddy." Ellie called out, Stephen waving to his father as well. Sheldon smiled warmly.

The children scampered off into the school, the class monitor waving to Sheldon once his kids were safely inside. He waved back, checking his watch.

Drat. It was almost nine. He was most definitely going to be late.

Racing to work as safely as he could, Sheldon flew up the stairs and bounded into his office out of breath.

"Elaine, I'm sorry I'm late. Do I have any messages yet?" He asked frantically, Elaine already out of her seat and handing the stack of messages to him.

"A few, Dr. Cooper. I'm going down to HR to get some welcome packets for the new student's this semester. I'll be back shortly," She promised, and Sheldon nodded.

"Good Lord…how do single parents do that every day?" He huffed, pulling up his schedule for the day on his laptop. He barely logged on when there was a loud pounding at the door.

"Come in," He said brusquely, annoyed at the fact he was so behind. His sour mood only grew when Barry Kripke strolled it, his face set in a peculiar expression.

"Cooper, we have to talk." Barry said, Sheldon not noticing how pale the other man was.

"I'm very busy, Barry. Can it wait until later?" He said dismissively, rising from his chair to pull out some lesson plans he had in a cabinet by the wall. Kripke made no move to leave, and Sheldon met his gaze with annoyance.

"I can't talk now, I am very behind this morning. I'm running late because I had to drop my kids off at school. Now is not a good time," He said with finality, not sparing him another glance as he continued to rummage through the cabinet.

Ever since Sheldon proposed to Amy all those years ago, his and Kripke's relationship had softened. They still weren't the best of friends, but they helped each other out now and then. And their verbal sparring had long since been laid to rest.

When a full minute passed and Kripke still made no move to leave, Sheldon looked up at him. The expression on Barry's face threw Sheldon for a loop.

"Barry-"

"You might want to sit down, Cooper." Barry said gravely, leaning back on Sheldon's desk. Sheldon narrowed his eyes at his former nemesis.

"And why is that, Barry? Did you put a whoopee cushion on my chair?" He asked dryly, softening the accusation with a chuckle.

Kripke rolled his eyes in frustration.

"Cooper! Sit down," He shouted seriously, and Sheldon did something he never did before. He followed an order from Barry Kripke. He gave him a lingering look before folding his arms across his chest. Coming around to his chair, he sat down slowly and waited for Barry to take the seat across from him.

"Alright. You have my attention. What was so pressing that you barged into my office like a lunatic?" He asked with curiosity.

Kripke chuckled, shaking his head.

"Your sarcastic tone may change once you hear what I have to say." Kripke said quietly, his eyes meeting Sheldon's.

Sheldon swallowed, his eyes glued to Barry's.

"What is it?" Sheldon ventured, unaware that his life was about to change forever.

Kripke smiled tremulously.

"Sheldon…you _may _want to clear your schedule the rest of the day."

Sheldon nearly ripped the car door off its hinges in his haste to get out of the car. He knew he shouldn't have driven all the way to UCLA in his distracted condition, but only one thought pushed to the front of his mind: get to Amy. Find Amy.

He was already behind at work. The day was wasting, and here he was, driving miles out of his way. He couldn't think about that now, though. He couldn't _think_, period. He rattled off an email to President Siebert, alerting him to the situation in case he hadn't already heard and telling him that he had to run an errand off campus. Considering the weight of the news, Sheldon was sure he'd understand. And even if he didn't, who cares?

He took the lecture hall steps two at a time, bursting through the door breathlessly. Amy's lecture was over, and she was standing at the lectern with what appeared to be a few students as well as the guest speaker, a Neuroscientist from Sweden.

Amy noticed her husband as he frantically strode toward her, the look in his eyes wild.

_What in the world is he doing here in the middle of the morning_? She wondered, disengaging from the small crowd.

"Excuse me," She said, meeting him at the base of the stage.

"Sheldon, what is it? What are you doing here?" She asked, trying to remain calm. She gripped his arms, the increasing wild look in his eyes scaring her.

He tried to calm his breathing, but he was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Amy…Kripke…Nobel nomination…" He sputtered, shaking his head and trying again to speak.

Amy pinched up her face, Sheldon's erratic words not making any sense.

"Sheldon, please calm down. Did something bad happen?" She ventured, relieved when he shook his head rapidly in the negative.

"No! No, Amy. No. Something…Oh, Lord. Something wonderful," He gasped, gripping her arms in turn and pulling her right off the stage and into his arms.

Relieved, Amy released a heavy breath and tremulously smiled at her husband.

"What is it, Sweetheart? Take a deep breath and tell me." She urged softly, trying to ground him by putting her palms against his cheeks.

Sheldon took a few deep breaths, his gaze not faltering from his wife's.

"Amy…Barry Kripke was nominated for a Nobel by the committee for a paper on T-duality he submitted two years ago. That particular paper was a collaborative effort between both of us. Barry…he put my name first, because it was mostly my old research on String Theory relating two theories with different space time geometries. The theory was proven. They've accepted it. We've…we won". He choked out, his gasps turning to sobs.

Amy stared at her husband in shock.

"Sheldon… are you sure?" She asked, daring not to hope. Her hands had suddenly gone numb an her legs felt like rubber.

Sheldon nodded, and for the first time since he burst through the door, a look of joy adorned his face.

"Yes. Amy…We won. I've won a _Nobel Prize_. We're going to Stockholm December 10th," He whispered, his voice wavering softly.

Amy shook her head, trying to clear it.

"But…I don't understand. You switched your field of study years ago. When did you write a String Theory paper with Barry Kripke?" She asked in confusion. The fact Sheldon did _anything _with Barry Kripke was news to her.

Sheldon led Amy to a seat in the first row, gently sitting her down before lowering himself next to her.

"He came to me after Ellie turned three. He was at a standstill with his research, and asked me if I'd be interest in collaborating. I didn't tell you; it didn't seem like a big deal. Nothing came of it, or so I thought. He put my name as main contributor, because he felt I contributed the majority of research. He knew how much I lamented not continuing with String Theory, especially since I devoted my life to it. He…he could have submitted it on his own, or when contacted by the committee claimed full ownership. But he didn't, Amy. He allowed my name to go first." Sheldon said in awe, still not comprehending how Barry Kripke could be so selfless. He felt a deep shame at having been so angry at him for so many years.

One thing was clear: Barry always put Science first, and that was what made him a great Scientist.

Amy began to cry, soft sobs shaking her already trembling body. Sheldon took her hand tightly in his own, too overwhelmed to think straight.

"Amy…I can't believe this. I…" He faltered, shaking his head. This had been his heart's desire his entire life.

"I am so proud of you, Sheldon. Oh, god…you did it. Both of you. Caltech must be over the moon that two of their Sr. Theoretical Physicists have won a Nobel." Amy gushed, throwing her arms around her husband tenderly.

Sheldon buried his face in Amy's hair, feeling more content than ever before.

"I think President Siebert will take a page in the Los Angeles Times to announce it," Sheldon said in humor, pulling away to gaze at his wife. Everything good in his life was because of this woman. She blessed him with her love, two beautiful children, and the support to win the most elusive prize in all of Science.

She truly _was_ the key to his happiness.

"I love you so much, Amy. I can't believe this is happening. But even if it weren't…I still have everything I ever wanted with you and the children." He whispered sincerely, tears rolling down his cheeks. Amy wiped them away lovingly.

"And I love you, Sheldon. Meemaw would be so proud of you," She said gently, tracing a path from his cheek to his lips.

Her handsome, brave man. She never could have guessed when she walked into that coffee shop how complete her life would be. She was so very proud to call this man her husband.

"You did it," Amy whispered again in awe. Sheldon shook his head in the negative, biting his lip harshly.

"No, Amy. _We_ did it. You and I." He rasped, staring her dead in the eye with conviction. "I could never have done anything like this without you. I struggled for years to prove myself; prove that I was better than everyone. I was so arrogant, Amy. It took the love of a good woman to prove to me just how unworthy I truly was. But your love…it transformed me. It made me better. And for that…I owe you everything." He said sincerely, wiping away Amy's tears in return.

No further words were needed as Sheldon crushed his wife to him, kissing her passionately and offering everything he had to the one person who had stood by him and believed in him without question. He owed everything to his wife, his very existence.

Amy clung to him, laughing at the sheer joy coursing through her.

Those left in the lecture hall laughed and cheered at the couple's display, not entirely sure what was happening, but knowing it happy nevertheless.

Sheldon stood, pulling his wife to her feet and swinging her around in a circle. He wanted to just scream with how happy he was. It was too much. It was all just too much to understand.

"Let's go. I think this warrant's you taking the rest of the day off." Sheldon chuckled, Amy following suit.

"Oh, yes. I think you're right. We have to tell everyone! Did you call your mother? We have to call Leonard and Penny-"

Sheldon pulled Amy close, kissing her cheek sweetly.

"That can wait. _Everything_ can wait. Right now…I want to take my wife home and have a private celebration. Just the two of us," He said, his voice low and sexy.

Amy gasped at the look in Sheldon's eyes. In every word and gesture they had ever shared, he had never looked at her in quite a way. It was a look that said she had better be prepared. She responded the only way that she could.

"Hoo…"

Sheldon smiled seductively, dragging his wife behind him quickly. He would most definitely show her the meaning of the word 'Hoo' today.

_Repeatedly_.

A/N – Thank you for reading. The last part will up in a few weeks, probably close to the Season 9 premier.


	45. Chapter 45

**~Chapter 45~ Epilogue 3**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.**

"…**I could not ask for more than this time together, I could not ask for more than this time with you. Every prayer has been answered- Every dream has come true. And right here in this moment, is right where I'm meant to be. Here with you here with me…" Edwin McCain – I Could Not Ask For More**

Sheldon was afraid that his enormous bubble was going to burst. He had achieved everything he have could have hoped for in this life. A proven theory, a Nobel, a wife and family, and lifelong friends who had come to mean the world to him.

There was no greater feeling of pride for Sheldon than looking out into the audience and seeing his Amy seated in the front row, his children on either side of their mother. The look of pride and love in their eyes made Sheldon cry. He didn't care that this was being televised to 180 countries, or that some of the world's leading dignitaries were there to see him falling apart. His eyes drifted over to Leonard, who had made the trip with Penny, and the two men shared a moment that neither would ever forget.

And once he had received his medal, and his best friend's took charge of his children, his wife gave him an afternoon that _they_ would never forget.

The early afternoon light was shining in through the bedroom window, casting patterns on the walls. The two spent lovers lay entwined in each other's arms, each feeling the same emotions, thinking the same thoughts…How was it that they were so happy?

It had been a whirlwind day for the couple. Even more than the day Sheldon found out he had won the Prize.

Sheldon never imagined when he awoke that morning back in October that the day would end with him being the recipient of a Nobel Prize. From the moment Kripke had left his office, the only thought in his mind was to find Amy. He had driven like a madman to the campus of UCLA, and by the time he spied Amy at that lectern, he could barely think clearly. Time had literally stood still.

Now, two months later and a Nobel Laureate, Dr. Sheldon Cooper found that time still hadn't resumed.

Sheldon's family desperately wanted to make the journey, but Mary wasn't up to traveling at the moment, George Jr. was on the road and couldn't get away, and Missy had her own two children to contend with. They watched the ceremony live via satellite, though; Mary cried her eyes out and Missy couldn't stop screaming words like 'Yee Haw' and 'Yes'.

They had spent a week in Sweden, enjoying the festivities and soaking up the culture. Sheldon was on auto pilot the entire trip.

Coming back to himself, Sheldon leaned down to breath in his wife, the delectable scent of her hair tingling his nostrils. That scent would always be linked to the happiness center of his brain; the nucleus accumbens where pleasure receptors were stored. She was everything in the world to him. There was no way he could have achieved what he had over the years without her presence and her steadfast support and guidance. He had previously thought of himself as an island, yet isolated by choice. Amy Farrah Fowler had crashed upon his shores, and there had been no going back.

"Amy?" He murmured, sliding closer to her and tightening his arms around her. He reveled in the feel of her soft skin, and how as he ran his hands down her silky back her womanly curves molded to his fingers. He released a husky sigh as she did the same to him, her gentle touch stirring his need once again. Sheldon closed his eyes and helplessly leaned forward to touch his lips with hers.

"Hmm…" Amy hummed, overwhelmed with desire once again as Sheldon's wandering hand reached down to squeeze the ample flesh of her backside.

"Sheldon…" She warned, finding it impossible to resist her husband as he pulled her closer to his warm body.

"Shhh." He coaxed, earning a moan from his wife as his fingers began to explore. "You know what, Mrs. Cooper? You talk entirely too much." Sheldon whispered, surprising Amy by swiftly rolling them over until he was hovering over her. The glorious weight of him made her sigh happily. Amy gazed into the eyes of her perfect other, a deep smile blooming on her lips.

"Who are you? And what have you done with Sheldon?" She asked happily. Sheldon merely smiled.

"Oh, he's right here. He's just overcome by your charms, is all." He said with a sexy lilt in his voice.

"Is that so? I knew my charms were plentiful, but I had no idea I could render you incapable to withstand them. You are, after all…you." Amy said, giggling.

Sheldon sat up, sighing.

"Does that mean play time is over?" He asked remorsefully.

"Sweetheart, of course I want you. Again. But perhaps we should get dressed. We told Leonard and Penny to give us an hour. It's bordering on two now," Amy said slyly, her lips making their way across Sheldon's neck. She smiled as he shivered uncontrollably.

"They owe us for years of annoying PDA's and extremely loud coitus. I think watching our children for a few hours is the least they can do. Especially seeing as it's a very special day for you and I." Sheldon said sincerely, kissing a path up to Amy's ear. It was her turn to shiver now, as Sheldon took her lobe in his mouth and gently sucked it.

Something struck Amy in that moment, which had her abruptly pulling away. Sheldon had said a very special day for you and I. Not for _him_. The fact he was including her in this made her heart race wildly. Sheldon pulled back as well, his face concerned.

"What is it?" He asked his wife, his voice the normally soft cadence she was used to. Tears sprang to her eyes as she looked at him.

"I…you said you and I." She answered vaguely, but Sheldon knew exactly what she meant.

"I did." He affirmed, nodding his head in conviction.

"Sheldon"- Amy began, but her husband cut her off gently.

"You are the reason this was possible, Amy. You are the reason it ever came to pass to begin with. Without you, and your support all of these years…you've cleared my mind of the debris that was clogging it. You gave me hope. Your love made it all possible. I would still be blindly stumbling around in the dark right now if it weren't for you. The life you've given me…the happiness. What I achieved today, is just as much yours as it is mine." He whispered.

The sincerity in his voice made Amy cry. This man had made all of her dreams come true. And she couldn't imagine life without him.

Amy pulled her husband closer, the need to make love to him overwhelming.

"You're right. Leonard and Penny can wait." She whispered huskily.

Sheldon didn't need to be told twice. Playtime was definitely over.

_This_…this was as serious as you could get.

_**Eight years later…**_

"Dad?"

Sheldon was broken out of his thoughts, turning around to see Stephen watching him with a smile. They were in the den playing X Box, and once again, Stephen was proving how adept at computer games he was. Like father, like son.

"Hmm?" Sheldon asked, turning his focus back to the game. Stephen hit pause, scooting back on the couch and threw down his controller. Sheldon's eyes narrowed as he wondered what was on his son's mind. He followed suit, putting his controller down as well and turned to give Stephen his full attention.

"What's on your mind, Stephen?" He asked curiously. Stephen shook his head, trying to find a way to begin this conversation.

"Are you disappointed that I've decided to join Doctors Without Borders instead of joining a practice here in the States once I'm done with my residency?"

Sheldon was taken aback by his son's question.

"No, Stephen. I'm not disappointed at all. I'm so proud of you. I always knew a child of your mother and I would be extraordinary. You've exceeded my expectations in so many ways, Son. Why would you even ask me that?" Sheldon asked seriously, frowning at the idea that Stephen worried about such a thing.

Stephen tilted his head, shrugging.

"Well…I know how important academia is to you. And I will be traveling a lot to foreign countries and won't be home much for a while. I just didn't know if you'd approve of my decision to work abroad, and for such little pay." Stephen answered honestly.

Sheldon smiled at his son, scooting closer and putting his arm across his shoulder. His son was so bright that he fast tracked through college himself, beginning medical school at Berkeley at the tender age of sixteen. Now twenty-one, he was nearly finished with residency and was ready to embark upon a career as a doctor.

"Stephen…I love you. Very much. That alone is reason for me to be proud of you. You're my child. And you and your sister have brought your mother and me nothing short of joy since the days you were born."

Stephen smiled shyly. Never once in his life had he ever remembered his father giving him a stern look, or a harsh word. He'd had a very happy childhood, growing up in home surrounded by love.

"I was wondering…were you happy when Mom told you that she was pregnant with me?" Stephen asked quietly, watching his father's reaction closely.

Sheldon sat back, smiling faintly.

"Before you were born, I worried what kind of father I would make. My own relationship with your grandfather George wasn't very healthy. I was so afraid that I would make mistakes with you. Or push you away without even knowing it. But I realized very early on that I had absolutely nothing to worry about. The second I laid eyes on you, Stephen…I was in love. You were so little, so helpless. It was my job to protect you, and I took it as a great honor. I still do." Sheldon said, his voice faltering.

Tears filled Stephen's eyes as he nodded his head in understanding.

"Is this _really_ what you want to do, Son? You have so many choices…I will support you no matter what you decide, but your mother and I want to make sure you've weighed all of your options. This is a big step. And a very altruistic one at that. And then…well, you watch the news. You know that there can be danger involved." Sheldon said grimly.

Stephen nodded resolutely, sitting up further.

"I know the risks, Dad. I know. And I do know that I have options. But I feel like my gifts would be better utilized if I used them for good. There are so many people who need help. How could I work in the States in a hospital and earn millions of dollars while there is so much suffering out there? Besides, I have a legacy to live up to. My Father is a Nobel Prize winner. I never want the world to think that I used my family name to land a cushy job here in California. This is as much about helping those who need it as proving my salt to myself. I want to do this." Stephen said firmly.

Sheldon smiled, gazing at his son with respect. It was just yesterday that he was a little boy, begging for piggy back rides and building forts with him in the living room. Where had the last twenty years gone? Sheldon wanted them back; he wanted to savor them all over again, even though he had each and every beautiful memory locked away inside his perfect brain.

"You have so much of your great grandmother in you. I'm so proud of you, Stephen. Meemaw would be proud of you, too. You make this family proud. Will you promise me something?" Sheldon asked seriously, his gaze penetrating.

Stephen swallowed at the way his father was staring him down, knowing whatever he wanted to tell him was extremely important.

"Anything, Dad." Stephen said sincerely, putting his arm around Sheldon.

Taking a moment to compose himself, Sheldon took a deep and steadying breath.

"_Always_ put love first. I know you are a man of Science. And believe me…that is a very important calling to aspire to. But…if and when you find someone who makes you question everything about yourself? Don't let that person go. For _anything_. Don't think you have all the time in the world to string them along, making them wait until you are ready to open your heart to them. Because that person will change your life. That person will be the key to your happiness. And no amount of schooling, or studying, or accolades will compare to the feeling of looking into the eyes of the one you love, and seeing love reflected back to you. I almost lost that once. I almost threw it away, because I was stubborn and frightened, and…just didn't want to yield. I don't want that for you. I want you to know love as strongly and as deeply as I have. It is _the_ most important thing in this life, Stephen. Nothing else even comes close," Sheldon said with conviction, tightening his grip on his son.

Stephen nodded vigorously, having never heard his father speak with such passion about such a thing before.

The years had only strengthened their bond, emotionally as well as physically. Sheldon saw so much of himself in Stephen; lanky, tall, blue eyes…shy. He could say now, looking back with maturity, that so much of his unwillingness to give in and love Amy the way that she deserved was due to shyness. Not feeling worthy. How lucky he was that Amy never gave up on him.

"Does this have to do with Mom?" Stephen suddenly asked.

Sheldon nodded.

"It does. Your mother is the best thing that ever happened to me. Well, besides you and Ellie." He said warmly, ruffling his son's hair. "But there was a time that I feared emotional bonds with anyone. The idea of falling in love was foreign to me, even ludicrous. I was so focused on Science, and my research. Then your mother came along, with her sensible shoes and her woolly cardigans. I was a dead man," Sheldon said fondly, chuckling as he looked far back into the past.

Stephen watched his father as he called upon his eidetic memory, the glow of love warm on his face. He smiled at the smitten look in Sheldon's eyes.

"I don't think I've ever seen two people more in love than you and Mom. The way you look at each other is just…special. When Ellie and I were kids, it used to freak us out. You seemed to finish each other's thoughts without words. All it took was a look between you. It was like you and Mom had this weird bond that we knew nothing about. It's still like that; as if you share a secret that we'll never know or understand."

Sheldon stared at his son, dumbstruck. He realized Stephen was trying to get him to admit something, by the way he gazed quizzically at his father. They had never told the children about the depth of their bond, or about the bottle they shared.

Over the years, he and Amy had toyed with whether or not to tell the children of their love story. They both decided that it was one secret they wanted to covet between them and them alone. Upon their deaths, the children would receive a key to a safe deposit box with the bottle, Amy's letter, and a letter written and signed by each of them. Until that day, their secret would remain hidden and shared between husband and wife.

Sheldon smiled secretively, turning his eyes downward.

"Couples share lots of secrets, Son. That is the point. To only share them with each other. Your mom and I made up a secret language once. And, we made up a game called counterfactuals. One day, when you come back to us for a visit, how about I show you how to play?" Sheldon asked eagerly.

Stephen smiled, his eyes watering.

"I'd like that, Dad. And just so you know…I hope to find a woman who loves me as much as Mom loves you. I know you think all I think about is medicine. But I'd like to share my life with someone special. But she will have to be _really _special. You said you want me to know what that feels like. Being your son…I think that I already do."

Sheldon nodded, pulling his son in for a hug. He hadn't hugged Stephen like this since Meemaw passed away. It was long overdue.

"I wouldn't wish anything less than magical for you, Stephen." Sheldon whispered gently.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

_**Five Years Later…**_

The grass rippled in the breeze as the September wind blew through it, producing a hypnotic swirl of green that was both relaxing and invigorating.

As charming as Pasadena was, it wasn't…_home_. And as Amy once told Sheldon, home was where you hung your hat. Once Stephen was settled abroad, working as a doctor in the Ukraine, and Ellie was settled in New York City after having attended Juilliard for Ballet, Sheldon and Amy decided that it was finally time to retire into Meemaw's house.

The day they left Pasadena was bittersweet for the couple; it was where they had met and fell in love. But each knew that their true love story began here in Galveston on a beach long ago. They wanted to live out their remaining years there, so close to the place that called to their very souls.

The great thing about Meemaw's home was how big it was. At least four times a year, their friends would head out to visit them. Leonard and Penny, Raj and Vivian, and Howard and Bernadette were frequent residents. And once a year they gang would meet up in either Pasadena (where the Koothrapalli's and the Wolowitz's still lived) or New York City (where not only the Hofstadter's lived, but Ellie as well). They never lacked for the company of their youth, and the times they did spend together now were all the more special.

Amy and Sheldon both had taken teaching positions at Rice University, Sheldon's alma mater. They enjoyed once again working together at another University, and were both treated like rock stars on campus which flattered and amused them to no end.

They had a good life. A happy life.

A life complete, in so many ways.

Sheldon reached over to grasp Amy's hand, the pair of them quiet as the setting sun cast a glow around them. The only sound for miles was the gentle lull of leaves as they rustled in the trees, the early evening crickets as they chirped for companionship, and Meemaw's wind chimes as they swung in the gentle breeze.

Amy looked up, entranced as she watched fireflies overhead against the backdrop of the massive tree above.

It was so peaceful here. Almost…like a dream.

Amy's eyes slid shut, as the soothing sounds of nature and the gentle touch of her husband's hand lulled her far away. A strange feeling of déjà vu overwhelmed her, but instead of causing unease, it brought her immense peace - almost as if something or someone was trying to tell her something important that she should have known. Her eyes opened suddenly, catching the last rays of sunlight filtering through the leaves and marveling at the shifting patterns as the sun disappeared over the hills surrounding the house.

There was nowhere on Earth she would rather be, nor anyone else she'd rather be with. Amy looked over at Sheldon, admiring his handsome profile. His eyes were closed, a slight smile adorning his sensuous lips. Even at sixty years old, he was still the most handsome man she'd ever laid eyes on. His chestnut hair had grown a shade lighter over the years, but it only added to his distinguished allure.

Amy tilted her head, her eyes drinking him in. To say she loved this man was an understatement. If she could paint the sky with the color of her love, she wouldn't be able to find a color worthy. Nor a canvas large enough on the planet to hold it all. But the one color that kept coming to mind without fail was the color blue. Differing shades of blue, swirling and tempestuous and serene at the same time.

How she loved the color blue…

The last twenty-five years with Sheldon had been perfect. Ups and downs, as any marriage would expect. They argued now and then about trivial things. They bickered. But at the end of the day, they would come together in their large beg, right in the center, and hold each other. Since Amy had first moved in with him all of those years ago, and other than the week before their wedding, they had only spent a handful of nights apart.

Amy smiled serenely, not able to remember a time she wasn't so happy.

'_Your future, Amy. Yours. And his. I can't tell you. I can't. But you'll see. You'll see, and you'll believe. And it will be…magical.'_

"Magical…" Amy whispered, a barrage of feelings and thoughts bombarding her at once. As quickly as the feeling came, it fled. The only thing left, was the feeling of Sheldon's warm skin as he tightened his grip.

She felt nothing short of bliss in this moment.

They were lying on a blanket outside under Sheldon's favorite tree, enjoying the coming twilight and each other's company.

"What did you say?" Sheldon asked quietly, turning on his side to look at his wife. Thirty years had passed since he first laid eyes on Amy Farrah Fowler. Sheldon could say with certainty that she was more beautiful now than ever. Amy turned on her side as well, never breaking the connection with their hands. She brought them to her mouth, kissing Sheldon's tenderly.

"I…it's nothing. Just a strange thought, that's all." She whispered, all at once feeling foolish. Sheldon chuckled at the blush on his wife's face.

"Nothing, huh? Well, it must have been _something_." He challenged softly, mimicking her earlier gesture and kissing her hand.

Amy shook her head, smiling.

"Can I tell you something, without you thinking I've gone mad?" She asked seriously.

Sheldon smiled warmly.

"Little Lady, I think after what we've experienced together there is nothing you could tell me to shock me anymore." He chuckled.

Amy giggled, loving the fact that since moving back to Texas five years ago, Sheldon's accent had once again returned.

"Well…years ago, when I fell ill, I experienced…something. I don't know, it happened so fast and because I was so sick I must have imagined it. But every now and then, like now? I feel this strange sense of someone watching me. Watching _over_ me. Over _us_. I know, it's crazy." Amy said, shaking her head at her folly.

Sheldon narrowed his eyes, pondering her statement with seriousness.

"It's not crazy though…is it Amy?" Sheldon asked her knowingly, his big blue eyes shining at her with love.

Amy found herself shaking her head in the negative.

"No. I guess it isn't. I can't believe how ill I was that day. I almost lost my life." Amy whispered, the feelings of helplessness still fresh in her mind.

Sheldon closed his eyes, trying to forget that awful day. Since then, he hadn't let it touch him. He couldn't. Those were the darkest moments of his entire life; walking into Amy's apartment and finding her near death.

Leaning his head back down on the blanket, Sheldon closed his eyes.

"You must never forget something, Amy. That day was the_ beginning_ of our lives. It was the day that I realized what I had. And what I wasn't willing to give up. As painful as it was, without it…I may have never woken up from the stupor I had been in. Something good came out of it. Something wonderful." Sheldon whispered softly.

Tears filled Amy's eyes as she smiled gently.

"You've made me so very happy, Sheldon. You've given me a life that I never dared to imagine. I guess sometimes, like now…I just feel like I'm going to wake up from the dream."

Her voice sounded so honest, so…disbelieving. Sheldon frowned, narrowing his eyes at her.

"Amy…it's you who have given me this beautiful life. When I think back to our early days, and how haughty I was…how clueless. It's a wonder you stuck around. I love you so much." He said tenderly, sitting up and urging Amy to join suit. He pulled her closer to him, running his hands down her back soothingly.

Amy in turn rubbed Sheldon's back, fitting her face in the crook of his neck. She loved being so close to him. After a few moments of nuzzling him, she laid her head on his shoulder.

His wife still retained the loveliness of youth, but they were now accentuated by a life of intelligence and experience. Her hair was a little lighter these days, Amy having given in years ago to Penny's gentle prodding and had lowlights added. The result intensified the green of her eyes, and Sheldon found himself entranced by her beauty all over again. She'd taken these days to a shorter, precision cut long bob. He thought he would miss her long hair, but he found her new look so captivating, especially when Leonard pointed out that she now resembled Carole from Star Trek Into Darkness. That sold Sheldon in five seconds flat.

Everything about his wife was elegant and regal.

As they sat there cuddling, a thought occurred to Sheldon. He pulled back, gazing at Amy curiously.

"Why did you put the I Ching symbol for Chaos as your Facebook profile picture after I returned from my train trip?" He asked suddenly.

Seconds ticked by before Amy realized Sheldon had spoken to her. Pulling away, she gazed at him with a confused look.

"Hmm?" She hummed, not understanding his query. Sheldon licked him lips before clarifying.

"Years ago, approximately two days before you…before I found you…I called you in the early morning hours after I saw you were posting on Facebook. Do you remember?" Sheldon asked, his face already troubled from conjuring up memories he wished he could forget.

Amy bit her lip, Sheldon's clues reminding her at once of what he spoke. She had had a nightmare. The one where she raced over to Sheldon's apartment to find him gone. She had woken up in a panic, and moments later Sheldon had messaged her. That was the beginning of nearly the end for her, as two days later she was fighting for her life in the ICU. But that wasn't the crux of Sheldon's question. It was about the Facebook profile picture.

"What made you think of that? It was twenty-five years ago." She said quietly. Sheldon swallowed visibly, nodding.

"I know. I know it was. But I've always wondered. Why did you choose _that _particular symbol for your picture? I had been away for nearly two months, and I hadn't realized you changed your avatar. I worried about you, Amy. And once I had recognized what the symbol was, I had worried even more." He admitted.

The tone of his voice was almost frightened. Amy reached up to caress his cheek, not sure where this was coming from. But after thinking on it for a moment, she realized he truly needed to know. Taking a deep breath, she let it out shakily.

"Well…after you left, I was of course shaken up. I felt helpless. Alone. And I worried whether or not you would ever return. As the weeks went by, I pondered how you felt everything in your life was falling into chaos. You feared that, so much. And in fearing that, you feared _me_._ I_ was part of that chaos. I feared you would never return to me. I began to research The I Ching. I know, as a Scientist, it was contradictory to my beliefs. But as I read the words, I realized how much they mimicked our relationship. They gave me comfort. I came to the realization that chaos wasn't always a curse." Amy stated softly.

Sheldon gaped at his wife with shock. The words of Arthur came flooding back to him like a tidal wave.

_Embrace the chaos…_

"Before a great vision can become reality there may be difficulty. Before a person begins a great endeavor, they may encounter chaos. As a new plant breaks the ground with great difficulty, foreshadowing the huge tree, so must we sometimes push against difficulty in bringing forth our dreams. Out of Chaos, Brilliant Stars are Born." Sheldon murmured.

Amy beamed at her husband, never failing to be impressed at his beautiful mind.

"Yes. You know it," She said, pleased.

"I know it." Sheldon affirmed, kissing the top of his wife's head tenderly. "I've lived it."

The great endeavor was, of course, their relationship. Written in the stars, eons ago. Chaos born out of the deepest of love, the most fiery passion and steadfast hope. What they had would never, ever die. Never be snuffed out. Their souls would reside together throughout eternity, always finding each other. Always returning to keep the other's light aflame.

Soulmates.

Sheldon gathered his wife close, closing his eyes and drinking her in. He _had_ unlocked that door. Thank God for that. Thank God for _her_.

"You are _my _chaos, Amy Farrah Cooper. And I wouldn't have it any other way." He whispered softly.

Amy smiled serenely, holding Sheldon tightly in return.

It had been worth it. Every single trial.

Worth it.

"And you are _mine_, Sheldon Lee Cooper. I wouldn't have it any other way, either."

Sheldon jumped up, grabbing his wife by the hand and spinning her around in a romantic waltz, so reminiscent to the one they shared at her cousin Cassidy's wedding so long ago. Their laughter could be heard for miles, as they danced to imaginary music that only they could hear.

Somewhere out there, in another time…another plane of consciousness…a little girl was smiling. Giggling. And dancing underneath a huge tree whose limbs extended to the sky.

Her voice cried out in proud merriment, dancing towards the horizon and leaving that meadow behind. Finally, she was free. Amy didn't need her anymore. Her job was finished.

"_She did it! They both did."_ Came her voice on the wind, sounding clear as crystal and sweet as honey as she floated into eternity.

And so they had.

Together.

**The End**

**A/N – A big thank you to everyone who has read, followed, favorited, reviewed, and rec'd this story over the last 11 months. Also to the readers who voted for me and this story at The Big Bang Theory Forum awards. I am blessed and fortunate to have such wonderful, caring readers. Writing this story and seeing it to fruition was an honor and a privilege. Thank you to the many friends I've made along the way. This was for you. This was for me. And this was for Sheldon and Amy. With love, Jo Anna (Darcyfitz)**


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Big Bang Theory, Angst, Romance