Ninja Turtles 1. Chapter 1

''Crazy! Crazyyyy!''

Crazy sighed.

_Not again_

''What, Mikey?''

''What are you doing?''

''Writing a new chapter for A Cursed Sword''

''Yeah, yeah, I don't care. I'm bored''

''Oh my! That is serious! I have to stop my work and help you!''

''Really?''

''**No**. Go bother someone else''

''But Raph is angry, Donnie is inventing with sharp thingies and Leo is sharpening his swords''

''And I am pissed. Now go away''

''You have to make me happier! It's your duty!''

''No it isn't! My duties are surviving school, work pressure, voices inside my head and Leo's passion about killing me''

''Please!''

''No!''

''Pleaaaaaseeee!''

''I'm too busy!''

''PLEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-''

''Mikey, that's not working on me''

''-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS-''

''You're turning blue-''

''SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-''

''Okay, okay, fine! I figure out something! Save your breath!''

''YAY! I knew I could count on you!''

''Oh, I will make sure that you aren't bored'' She said with a bit of a evil smirk.

* * *

''Well, hello dear readers! How's it going? Have you thought about your favorite turtles personal life? What do they like? What do they hate? What kind of dirty things they do when no-one sees? Well, if you have thought about that, then I, Crazy Turtle Girl, will show you what our dear green guys are really like. And if this isn't enough, I have more! You can make your turtle do some dare you would like. Make your fingers ready for some questions!''

''Wait, what!?'' Mikey shouted.

''This is for interrupting my work. Have fun!''

''Bu-but you can't just- Wait a second... Does Donnie know that you broke his calculator?''

''...No''

''You know what to do''

''Okay, fine! Ugh... You can say some questions to me too. You can call me either Crazy or by my other nickname, Turtla. Happy, Mikey?''

''Very''

''Great... Oh yeah! At the moment I am with 2003 turtles, but if you want to say something to 2012 turtles, I invent a dimension machine and find them. That's pretty much it''

''Don't you care what others are going to say?''

''Mikey... Have you even read my stories? Tell me when I have cared about others' thoughts?''

''True...''


	2. First Questions! Wohoo!

Crazy is on her computer.

''Oh, I have more messages... Let's see... WHAT! They took me seriously!? **MIKEYYYYYYYYYYY**!''

''What!?''

''We have questions!?''

''Well, duh! This is a ask story! What did you expect!''

''But I thought I was unpopular!''

''Let's just answer them!''

''Fine...''

* * *

unicorn-vomit:

Lol, this is a good idea! I was missing all those truth and dare like fics :D  
1) I dare you, Crazy, to tell Donnie you broke his calculator 3:)  
2) what do the three youngest think of Leo when he went all dark and moody? (I think that was season 4..)  
Lol, bye! P.s. Expect many dares and questions from me...expect it ;)

* * *

''WHAT!? YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!''

''Come on what's the worst that can happen?''

''He could kill me!''

''He won't kill you. Maybe just torture''

''Not. Helping!''

''Come on! You can do it! You're the ma- umm- Woman!''

* * *

''YOU DID WHAT!?''

''It was an accident!''

''HOW THE DID YOU EVEN DO IT!?''

''Umm... I was playing Minecraft with Raph... Then creeper killed me... I lost all of my diamonds... I was angry... Then I needed to throw something... What are you doing Donnie? No, don't come closer! **Go away**! I write embarrassing story about you! No- **DON'T- ****AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!**''

* * *

Unfortunately we can't see this scene anymore, because it might disturb some of our viewers. Let's move on.

* * *

Donnie is bandaging Crazy's head, so we can move on.

''Luckily it was head and nothing important...''

''Just answer the other question''

''Okay... Our thoughts of moody Leo? Well... Me and Mikey just tried to live with it, but Raph... Well... It broke him. He would never admit it, but at that moment he cared about Leo the most... I could see through his anger that it was hurting him...''

''Yo. What are you doing?'' Raph asked, coming by.

''Ah, nothing! Absolutely nothing!''

''Actually we were talking about-'' Crazy started.

''How Crazy needs a hug!''

''What!? I don't need...''

''Sure you do! Don't act strong! You were bullied at school and Leo tried to kill you! Come here so I can hug you!''

''I wasn't bullied at- AGH!'' Crazy was interrupt as Donnie putted his strong hands around her. Crazy's mouth was on Don's shoulder, so no one could understand her cursing.

''Okay... Well, I hope you'll be okay'' Raph patted crazy's head, ignoring the deadly glare she was giving him. Then he just walked away and Donnie released Crazy.

''You know I hate hugs!''

''If you tell this to Raph, I give you to shredder as a free gift''

''...I keep my mouth shut...''

''Atta girl! Have a cookie!''

* * *

Turtle Lover101

Hello! Well, Im kind of siding with you that Mikey was bugging you, but I really like your stories so far and I really like how you write so may I put a dare or two here?  
Okay Dare 1- Make Donnie sing, I heard he's a pretty good singer, maybe even better than Mikey! (haha!8D)  
Oh well, I can't really come up with a song but I just want you to make him sing... pppppppppppllllllllllllllleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Okay Second Dare- Make Raph wear a pink tutu. Hahahahahahha! D  
Okay bye!

* * *

''I have to get beated up again!?'' Crazy shouted.

''Just do it and you're death will be quick'' Mikey "comforted".

''Fine! But you're dealing with the singing part''

''Sure''

* * *

''And for your information, our dear readers, I don't even have to try to get Donnie out to sing. He's in shower at the moment'' Mikey said with evil smirk.

He quietly opened the door and showed our dear Donatello holding a sponge like it was a mic and singing to it.

''You know what to do with that big fat butt

Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle  
Just a little bittle

Patty cake patty cake  
With no hands  
Got me in this club making wedding plans  
If I take pictures while you do your dance  
I can make you famous on Instagram  
Hot damn it, ooh  
Your booty like two planets ooh  
Go head, and go ham sandwich-

**AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! MIKEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING!**''

''I am so going to die but it is worth it!''

* * *

In Raph's bedroom, Crazy has already got the pink tutu on with only three heart attacks.

''Okay... Now it is on... I can just walk away...''

''CRAZY! WHAT THE HECK''

''Oh fuck''

* * *

''Donnie! I have said million times that I am sorry! Stop strangling me!''

''Fine, but this will be the last time you do that''

''Sure, sure! Hmmm... I wonder is Crazy still alive''

To his answer, Crazy ran to living room, yelling, as Raph was behind her back.

''**CRAZY! GET OVER HERE!**''

''**NO RAPH NO! NOT THE TICKLE TORTURE, NOT THE TICKLE TORTUUUUUUUUUUUUUREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!**''

''Oh well, she'll be through something worse than dying''

* * *

Just for your information, there are some kind of question that I will not answer:

1: The ones that are too long

2: The ones that contain meeting someone out of original characters. I will not bring your OC's to this story.

And you can complain, but I will not listen


	3. Why Leo Wants to Kill Crazy

Before I start the AskDare TMNT, I have a message for the ones that wanted me to continue my other story Drunk Leo. I can't continue it. And don't start to yell at me, Fanfiction removed it. Why? Well here's the email I had:

_Main reason for removal: "Not allowed: interactive, chat/script, real person, mst, and etc."_

_The above story has been removed because it violated the guideline detailed on the upload page._

Well, I'm not really understanding one bit of those reasons, since I am from Finland and I haven't learn ''big words'', but I'm still pissed. Fanfiction has allowed people to write sex stories, so why can't I write about turtle getting drunk?

Also, I was supposed to post this chapter yesterday, but Fanfiction blocked my account for a day. Seriously? Did I deserve **that**? because of a story?

Now I have complained, tell me your thoughts, and let's get started!

* * *

**Cat girl**

**To Everyone: Hello. To Raphael: I dare you to switch personalities with Mikey for three days. To Mikey: I dare you to eat ALL of this chocolate bar ( A HUGE chocolate bar lands right in front of Mikey.) To Leo: Why are you bent on killing Crazy? She's awesome! To Crazy: How many times has Leo tried to kill you? To Master Splinter: I wish you the best with keeping your sanity through this Q.D! Thanks, Cat girl**

* * *

''What! I have to be Mikey for three days!'' Raph yelled

''Are you afraid?'' Crazy teased

''I am not! This is a piece of cake. I can do it!''

* * *

**One Hour Later:**

''I can't do it! It's too stupid! I have lost my honor!'' Raph cried into his hands.

''Well, it looks like we're giving up. **THAT MEANS THAT YOU CAN STOP HITTING MY HEAD, MIKEY**!''

* * *

''Chocolate bar? Hah! I knew that you were nicest to me!''

''Uh, Mikey, maybe you should take a **really** good look at this chocolate bar'' Crazy said, looking at the chocolate that was as long as Mikey.

''What do you mean?''

''It's **HUGE**! It's taller than me!''

''Everything is taller than you. You're pretty short for a fifteen year old girl''

''Grrr... Fine. It'll be your own funeral'' Crazy said, crossing her arms.

Mikey just smiled wildly at the chocolate and started to eat it

''Mikey! I wasn't serious! Stop! You're killing yourself!''

Then Crazy's mouth was hanging open, because the chocolate bar was all gone.

''Ho-ho-how?''

''Hehe. It's a talent''

* * *

''Why I want to kill Crazy? Because she is a monster. Others may not know it yet, but she is something weird. I just don't know what'' Leo said darkly.

* * *

''How many times has Leo tried to kill me? 36745-''

A katana flew near Crazy's head.

''Uh... 36746 times''

* * *

''Hey Master Splinter! There is question for you too!''

''Thank you, Turtla''

''Uh, everybody calls me Crazy...''

''Turtla is better. Let's see... Yes, sometimes it is bit hard to deal with four turtles and their rather wild friend-''

''Hey...''

''-But I am getting this all through just fine. After all, they are just children''

''Hehe... Thanks Master Splinter. But Let's move on to next person''

* * *

**peacemaker1210**

**My dares:**

**Leo: I dare you to hug Crazy and tell her she's the best. (Both torture and comfort for Crazy cause I know she hates hugs now.**  
**Raph: I dare you to keep two cockroaches in your shell for a day. XD**  
**Donnie: I dare you to ask April out and kiss her during the date.**  
**Mikey: I am not going to any dares on you because you are too adorable.**  
**April: Do you like Donnie? (Is asking April allowed?)**  
**Casey: April belongs to Donnie, back off!**

* * *

Leo and Crazy were two feet away, glaring at each other.

''Come on guys! Make up your differences and hug!'' Don yelled.

Both sighed deeply and walked closer to each other. They looked eye to eye.

Then Leo putted his hand on shoulder.

''You're ok'' He quickly said.

''Thanks'' Crazy said as quickly and they both walked away.

Don sighed.

''Actually they did it better than I thought'' Raph said, rolling his eyes.

* * *

''No''

''Come on Raph, please''

''No''

''If you don't put cockroaches on your shell, I am the one who gets beaten up''

''I hate bugs''

''Oh, you're being a gir- Wait, I know what to do! Let's change bodies!''

''What!''

''I'm a author, remember. I created last week a gun for that''

''Without Donnie knowing?''

''Nah, Mikey got blamed for the mess. But that doesn't matter, when I get my machine finally to some use!''

''Nuh uh, no way. I'm not turning into girl''

''Fine, then you will have cockroaches on your shell''

''**LET'S CHANGE BODIES**''

* * *

''Okay! I have done it!'' Crazy said in Raph's body.

''What!? You have!? I'm a girl!'' Raph said in Crazy's body.

''Yes, now we can get to-''

''And man how short you are! Are you sure you're fifteen?''

''Hardy har, can we now please go to- **Raph, stop staring at my chest**!''

''But this is confusing! What the heck do women do with these things?''

''**Just give me the frigging cockroaches!**''

When Crazy was about to take them, she stopped.

''What's wrong?'' Raph asked.

''I just remembered that **I **hate bugs!''

''Oh for the love of the-''

* * *

Before we start, yes, you can make questions to April. She is an original character. Heck, you can even make questions to Shredders. (But I can't promise that he will do the dares)

* * *

''Why would I ask April out? She is at least ten years older than me'' Don said, confused.

''Just do it. For the one time I am the sane one'' Crazy said (Who is now back to herself).

''What was that supposed to-''

''Just go, tiger!'' Crazy yelled, pushing Donnie through April's window.

''Don! What are you doing!?'' April shouted.

''April! Do you want to go out with me!?''

''Donnie, you just broke my window and now you're asking-''

''That means 'no'!? Oh well, this wasn't done with my will! Question forced me to do this! Now I just deal with the rest of it!'' Donnie yelled before he kissed April.

''Don what are you-''

''I've done it! Now I can go and kill Crazy! Bye!'' Donnie shouted, running out. On a rooftop, he met Casey''

''Well, well, well. Somebody has been a bad turtle'' Casey said, patting his baseball bat.

''Casey, what are you talking a-''

''I just read my question. What have you been doing with April!?'' Casey glared at Don.

''This is misunderstanding! I have never- Crazy! Where is she when you need her?''

* * *

''Well, this is weird. I have been standing over here for five minutes and Donnie hasn't come to kill me. Should I be worried? Oh well, maybe he got a date with April''

* * *

''Umm, Crazy... What are you doing?'' Mikey asked

''Inventing''

''Why?''

Crazy just smiled at him.

''Because I am going to another universe on the next chapter''


	4. A Whole New World!

Hello my awesome readers!

I just realized that Crazy doesn't have any kind of character info. So before we start, I am going to make one.

* * *

Name: Turtla Hill (That's English version of my Finnish name)

Nickname: Crazy

Age: 15

Hair: Brown, short to shoulders

Eyes: Green

Anything Else: Freckles on nose

* * *

Well, that was the info for now. I hope you can now imagine Crazy more easily. If you want to know more, ask.

But no more babbling, Let's get to questions.

* * *

**FrayedEnds**

**Hm, I guess I'll do this!**

**Have Mikey (or maybe all the turtles, I don't care) go one week without pizza, ice cream, etc.**  
**;)**

* * *

''*twitch* O-o-o-o-one we-e-e-e-ek withou-u-u-u-ut pi-i-i-i-izza *twitch*'' Mikey said nervously.

''Calm down, Mikey. It'll be okay. Besides, it'll be good for your health-'' Donnie tried to comfort.

''NO IT WONT BE! PIZZA IS MY LIFE! I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT IT! IT'S LIKE TAKING LOLLIPOP FROM A BABY!''

''That isn't going to help anything!'' Donnie snapped.

''You're right... I can do this. I'll just be a week without thinking about-''

''Pizza is here!'' Crazy shouted as she and Raph walked to lair. Donnie glanced worriedly at Mikey, whose eyes started twitching like crazy.

''Uh, Crazy... About that pizza-''

''No, Donnie. I am not buying vegetarian pizza just because it's 'healthier' ''

''You don't get it-''

''There are some things you have to do like Mikey does. And one of those is pizza. None of us like veggies or fish like you do''

''But question-''

''I'll answer them later. First, I have to eat delicious this pizza with cheese, bacon, pepperoni, pineapple and sausage''

Mikey felt how his tongue dropped.

''After that, we can eat some ice cream. Since Mikey has been bugging me less lately, I bought his favorites. Mix of chocolate and strawberry with marshmallows, chocolate cookies and extra chocolate syrup'' Raph said.

Mikey drooled a bit.

''Who wants the first slide?'' Crazy asked, opening the box.

Mikey tried to look away, but his eyes deepened on a heavenly sight. He wanted to grab the pizza, kiss it and eat it with only one chew. But he has agreed the dare. Since he couldn't choose between his honor or breaking the dare, he putted his hands to his head as he screamed. Then he ran away.

''Unbelievable. We try to be nice to him and he screams at us'' Crazy said, crossing her arms while Raph nodded.

Don just facepalmed.

* * *

**Turtle Lover101**

**Omg! I loved your first chapter! Okay another dare, make Mikey cook something impossible, and then make Leo eat it! Like a rat pizza. ;) Okay no.. make Leo do somthing bad to Donnie or lie to Donnie saying he did something bad. I don't know. Well see ya! :)**

* * *

''That's a great idea! Unfortunately, we can't make rat pizza, because we're all afraid of Master Splinter's reaction. But Mikey's new diet gave me an idea'' Crazy said, smirking evilly.

''No, Crazy! I'm not going to kitchen! It reminds me of food!'' Mikey shouted.

''I've been waiting this moment ever since Leo tried to poison me! You go there or me and Raph will put posters of pizza everywhere!''

''On a second thought, Leo did kick my ass too hard on last training...''

* * *

''No'' Leo said darkly.

''Why not!?'' Both Mikey and Crazy shouted.

''Because I don't trust neither of you''

''You don't trust your own brother! You should be ashamed of yourself! How could you do that to your own little brother!'' Crazy said in shock.

''Shut up, Crazy, or I will trow you from roof **again**!''

''Don't yell like that! You're making Mikey cry!'' Crazy said, pointing at Mikey, who was near to tears.

Leo tried not to look at the pitiful look Mikey was giving him, but he just couldn't.

''Sigh. Fine''

''Wohoo! I knew you trusted me!'' Mikey yelled as Crazy smiled.

When Mikey went away to get the food, Leo turned to Crazy and glared at her.

''What are you up to?''

Crazy gasped. ''That's hurting my feelings, Leonardo! Why would I do anything!?''

Leo gave her 'you know what I mean' look.

''Don't worry. I haven't cooked it at all. I promise''

''Bon appetit!'' Mikey yelled as he came back with a cake that looked... Surprisingly normal. It was green, but looked normal.

''Huh. Maybe you didn't lie'' Leo said as he took a bite. His face immediately turned green as he puked it out.

''You lied!'' He yelled, pointing at Crazy.

''No I didn't. I didn't cook it at all. But I did choose the supplies''

''What is in this!?''

''Well... Mostly broccoli and spinach... There might some mustard also, but I'm not hundred percent sure... Hey! Where are you going?'' Crazy asked as Leo ran to bathroom.

* * *

''Yuck! I feel bad for Leo'' Raph said in disgust.

''I don't. And the dare isn't fully done''

''Are you seriously going to torture him more?''

''Of course I am going to! Don't you know what he did after he came back from bathroom? He tied me up and tried to drown me to ocean! I would be dead if I didn't have my pocket knife with me! He is planning my funeral at the moment!''

''Okay, I get it... What are you going to do to get Donnie mad''

''Oh I know already. I just have to wait for the fake tears''

* * *

''Donnie! Donnie!'' Crazy yelled as she cried.

''Crazy! What's wrong!?'' Don said with concern.

''Le-leo!''

''What did he do? Did he try to kill you again?''

''Yes and no. This is worse!''

''What!?''

''H-he...!''

''You can tell me anything!''

''He drank all of the coffee!''

Donnie just stared for a moment. Then his eyes turned red in anger.

''Don't worry. I am going to kill that bastard'' Don said with death glare as he walked off.

When he walked away, Crazy stood up and turned to corner.

''He's gone. You can come out, Raph''

''Weren't you bit too dramatic?''

''Whatever as long as it works''

They both listened the noises that came from another room.

_''Donnie? Why are you looking at me like that? What's that hammer for? Wait! Don't come closer! What are you doing!? Ouch! Stop! Aaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!''_

Raph grimaced, imagining how much pain Leo was into.

''What about when he finds out that there is still coffee?'' He asked

''There isn't''

''You drank it all!?''

''Of course not! I hate coffee!''

''Then how the hell is it gone!?''

''Mikey drank it''

''What?''

''He wanted to drink something for his depression, but there wasn't any beer. Coffee was the next thing in the list''

* * *

''It's ready!'' Crazy shouted.

''What's ready?'' Raph asked.

''My dimension machine! Now I can get to another universe!''

''No way!'' All but Leo yelled.

''Why not?''

''You could get hurt!'' Said Don

''There can be pizza monsters!'' Said Mikey

''Our dimension is the best!'' Raph said.

''What are you waiting for, Crazy! Get ready! If you never want to come back to here, you should know that I fully support you!'' Leo said

''Shut up, Leo! But seriously, Crazy! You can't just leave us like that!'' Raph shouted.

''I'm not leaving you! I just want to see something new! I come back today, I promise''

''But-''

''Bye!'' Crazy yelled as she pressed the button. Purple flash filled the room until it faded. There were turtles, but no Crazy.

* * *

''Ugh. What happened? Did it work?'' Crazy said as she looked around. To her surprise, she saw a giant turtle. He looked like Mikey, but he was shorter and had freckles. They both stared at each other before they started to scream.

''Aaaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!

''Mikey! What are yel-'' A turtle who looked like Raph came to room, but he was also short and had crack on his plastronn. It didn't take long for him to also start screaming.

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Shut up! I am having a serious experime-'' Tall turtle, who looked like Donnie but he had a missing tooth, ran to room, only to be shocked by seeing a human girl.

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Guys, be quiet! I'm trying to train over he-'' A turtle who looked like Leo, but wasn't as scary, came to room.

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''Aaah!''

''What is going on here!?'' She heard a deep shout. She turned around and saw a tall scary rat. She could only scream.

''AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!''

Then she fainted.

* * *

What will happen next? Wait until next chapter!

Talking about next chapter, it won't come for a while. But I have a good reason. School. You see, this is my last year in this school, and I have to get good grades if I want to get to good high school.

I will but more questions to next chapter, I just wanted to get this out from the way. Bye!


End file.

Ninja Turtles, Humor