Invader Zim 1. It starts, cheesiness to be expected

"I don't wanna go to school I don't need no education I don't wanna be like you I don't wanna save the nation"  
  
ShiMMy gets dragged into view by a man in a white coat, "Let me the fuck go! Who are you???" The man in the white coat plops ShiMMy into her chair in front of her terribly slow computer. While duct-taping ShiMMy to chair, the man in the white coat starts," You need to start your fic" "You need to untie me you sonofabitch!" Man in white coat stares cock-eyed at her for a second then puts a hockey mask (like Hannibal's) on ShiMMy then walks away. "Okay... I don't know what the fucking hell that was about but since I'm here.. god damn it.."  
  
A DOOM to REMEMBER ~ShiMMy123's twisted spoof of the cheesy flick, "A walk to remember"  
  
It was like any other day. Dib was in the front of the class rambling on about how evil cheese  
  
vampires were living in the school cafeteria's freezer. Zita would raise her hand and rate Dib's crazy level  
  
for the day and Miss Bitters would agree and reward her with a free "A". Zim sighed; he hated this place  
  
and everyone in it. Every agonizing day was a little more motivation for his mission. Destroy it all. He  
  
loved destroying; it was what he did best, even when he didn't intend on it. A simple procedure of starting  
  
the engine of his Voot Cruiser turned into fiery explosions and near death experiences. He leaned back and  
  
propped his feet up on his desk. He glanced at the clock, it felt like it had been 12: 55 for hours now.  
  
Knowing that skool and its pathetic excuses for supplies, it probably had been. Out of sheer boredom Zim  
  
started to balance his pencil on his lip. At this point, Dib had already dropped his head in repeated rejection  
  
and returned to his seat. Zim chuckled to himself. He loved seeing Dib in his depressed, weak human state.  
  
"Sorry I'm late" said an unfamiliar voice. Zim glanced up to see a strangely recognizable girl standing next  
  
to Miss Bitters' desk holding a pass. "I just got my braces off" the girl continued. Miss Bitters just stared at  
  
her for a minute, "Class, I'd loathe to present the newest stink-child to join our class, what's your name?"  
  
she growled. "Um, I'm not new Miss Bitters, its me, Gretchen? Remember? I just got my braces off see it  
  
says it right there in my pass." She pointed at the pass lying on the teacher's desk. "Just take Gretchen's old  
  
seat, I'm sure she's dropped out for a new life of DOOM anyways..." Miss Bitters retorted apathetically.  
  
"Whatever you say Miss Bitters" Replied Gretchen, a little confused. 'Do I look that different now?' she  
  
thought to herself as she walked to her new/old desk. But in fact she had. Her teeth no longer stuck out of  
  
her face as if someone had punched her in the back of the head, a small, annoyingly cute mole was now  
  
visible on her right cheek; The braces took total focus off of any other significant feature she had and for  
  
some reason, she was wearing a purple short-sleeve shirt and farmer jeans. She still looked geeky, but not as much as before. Now, you could actually tell there was a pretty face hiding behind a sleeve of brown  
  
bangs that now covered her forehead. But, as stupid as humans are, we all know they'll just analyze the  
  
things that slightly cover her good features. Of course there's not many. People are just really stupid.  
  
Before Zim knew it, it was time to leave. Boy, does time fly when you play with a pencil. Before  
  
he got a chance to walk out the door, Dib was already in his face. "SOO, ZIM! What EVIL ALIEN plans  
  
have you got today?? HUH? HUH? HUH?" Zim just rooted a path around the raving maniac and continued  
  
walking. "Not today Dib.. I'm in NO mood for your CRAZINESS" Dib continued to follow him. "I  
  
KNOW you're up to something ZIM! You ALWAYS are!"  
  
"Just leave me alone, just for today Dib? YOU CAN HAVE THE REST OF MY EXISTANCE ON THIS  
  
FILTHY PLANET TO BE ANNOYING, just leave me alone just for this ONE day. now go away before  
  
I-"  
  
"Before you WHAT Zim? PROBE ME??" Zim was in pure disgust over that last comment and stopped in  
  
his tracks for a second. "KEEP ME OUT OF YOUR SICK BIG-HEADED FANTASIES DIB!" Zim  
  
started walking again. "HEY ZIM!" He had had it, Zim started to turn around and was ready to smack  
  
Dib's enormous head right into the concrete wall next to them. "WHAT?" Dib then pulled something from  
  
his bag. "I was just wondering.. How would your alien head react to ..SALAMI!" Dib then smacked Zim  
  
off the side of the head with a salami stick. It left a black scrape across Zim's face and it singed a little.  
  
"AHH! THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU!" Zim then started to chase Dib down the corridor of the  
  
skool. Dib attempted to turn around and hit Zim with the salami stick again but it was knocked from his  
  
hands. Dib continued to run with Zim on his tail screaming at him, until he came across a pair of stairs that  
  
seemed to go upward. Not even thinking, Dib ran up the steps. He then realized that the steps had taken him  
  
to the roof of the skool. Zim then lunged from the stairs onto Dib's back and started pummeling him in the  
  
face. Dib returned it with a kick to the gut sending Zim backward, but as soon as he hit ground he jumped  
  
back up and started again on Dib. They continued to fight and strangle each other, without warning, Dib  
  
had grabbed Zim by his upper jaw and started pulling on it. Zim attempted to yell but it only came out more  
  
like 'gahaah'. He then retorted to Dib with a punch to the nose. Dib then let go of Zim's jaw and they both  
  
got to their feet. Dib was about to kick Zim again but without even thinking, Zim had shoved Dib to a point  
  
where they were both running, Dib backward, while Zim forced him forward. Before he had realized it, Dib  
  
wasn't in front of him anymore. Zim then looked over the edge of the skool roof to see Dib lying  
  
unconscious in the dumpster below. It had happened.. Zim had won. "Victory for Zim!" He cried in  
  
excitement. Suddenly he heard a noise, movement. In the dumpster, Dib twitched a little bit and his head  
  
fell to the side. "Oh come on!" Yelled Zim in disapproval. Suddenly, an old couple then walked by and  
  
looked in the dumpster as they walked by. "Would you look at that? Someone threw out a perfectly good  
  
head!. Oh wait. there's a body attached.."  
  
Zim sat outside of the principal's office. He grumbled to himself. If it weren't for Sarah ratting him out.. he  
  
could've been at home doing experiments right now. He then lifted his head to hear the door creek open.  
  
"Step inside," said a raspy voice. This would normally terrify a child in this position, but Zim just cocked  
  
an eyebrow and stepped inside. There he saw Miss Bitters sitting behind the desk with a 'principal' tag on  
  
the desk. "MISS BITTERS? YOURE THE PRINCIPAL?" She just stared at him blankly. "Take a seat."  
  
Zim sat down. "We don't have enough funding to get a principal, so they left this HORRIBLE job to me,"  
  
she hissed. Zim stared at her for a moment. "Riight.. well, could we please get to the part where you punish  
  
me? I'd like to get home soon.. I need to . feed my dog."  
  
"SILENCE!" She slammed her fists on the desk, and a cockroach squirmed across the top quickly then went back into hiding. "As much humor as the other students got out of nearly killing Mr. Membrane, YOU MUST BE PUNISHED!"  
  
He stared coherently.  
  
"A HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PUNISHMENT! First, I will send a SWAT team to your home and beat your  
  
dog with a stick until he is dead!" Zim leaned back, carelessly and listened. "AND ALSO. You will need  
  
to GIVE BACK TO THE COMMINUTY ... with EXTRA CORRICULAR ACTIVITES!" Zim slumped  
  
forward. "This month, our skool is having a fall play for the town. and YOU Zim WILL BE IN IT!" Zim  
  
stared at her with a twitching eye, and then fell to the ground in a dramatic outburst.  
  
"WHAAAAAT???????"  
  
ShiMMy, still tied up, is sitting at her desk tapping her fingers on her desk. "It's done..." Man in white coat walks in room and looks over her story. "PATHETIC! But it'll have to do." ShiMMy scowls at him through her mask. "Now you see why I put that hockey mask on you. NO BITING! HAHA!" walks away. "Well, I'm sure most of you will agree with the man who has duct-taped me to a chair.. But I'm working on it!" 


	2. The madness that is ZIM

Well well wellll wellll!!! So you're reading this eh? YAY!! Continue to read! For I have a proposition for you, me dear reader; If you can spot where I am in this chapter, I will add you, YES YOU! In the next one, hopefully this will actually get interesting by then. Oh well! You all know the disclaimer thingie so I won't even bother.  
  
A DOOM to remember  
  
Zim leaned his head against the cloudy window of the bus. Mud had apparently been splashed on the outer side of the windows, leaving them a brownish-black color looking quite disgusting. Zim had only had to take the bus once while he was on Earth; from that day Gir had gotten him lost in the city. It was something he despised greatly, but in order to get to the theater where this so-called "play" was going to take place, he'd have to take this pathetic excuse for a hunk of metal.  
  
He watched as a few children played jump rope on the sidewalk as the bus passed a small ghetto-like neighborhood. House with boarded up windows, bikes lying to rust on the practically bare lawns, not to mention the only few adults present were practically decaying and armed with shotguns as they watched the younger neighbors shout to one another; pants baggy, boxers puffed, and bandanas tied on their foreheads. The older adults would shout hear and there, "Get off my lawn you little punk!" "Stop teasing my dog!" Zim rolled his eyes.  
  
Suddenly a loud 'splat!' noise shocked him into sitting upright. An orange blotch had struck the outside of his window right near his head. 'Oh that's nice.' He thought bitterly. He lifted his head just enough to look over the back of his seat to see a kid, about in his teens, wearing a black hooded sweatshirt with the hood flipped over his head riding a bicycle. He was waving a paintball gun in the air with one hand while balancing his steering of the bike with the other.  
  
"Stink beasts." Grumbled Zim; slumping back into his seat.  
  
From the seat parallel to where Zim sat, was lo and behold, Gretchen. She glanced over at Zim from her book. The Bible. Zim felt eyes upon him and looked over to their position. Gretchen's eyes met his, she smiled, Zim quirked an eyebrow. She turned back to her book still smiling sweetly.  
  
'What the hell? With an expression like that, who knows what evils that creature is conjecturing!' Thought Zim; Paranoid, as usual.  
  
**************************************************************************** **********  
  
It had felt like it took forever for that stupid bus to reach the theater. In the meantime, Zim had started counting trees passing by, which made him a little nauseous now.  
  
"All right everyone off the bus!" Shouted the grimy bus driver. Zim shuddered; this was it. THE EXTRA CURRICULUM ACTIVITIE.THING. He stood up, arms hanging loosely, an expression that just seemed to shriek "WHHHY???" He stood for a few minutes, waiting for a noble worm baby to let him out. Of course no one did. Zim sneered "Ungrateful little brats."  
  
"Go ahead." Said a voice. Zim looked up to see it was Gretchen. She smiled that same sugar coated smile as before. Zim raised his eyebrows.  
  
"That's right, OUT OF ZIM'S WAY!" He shouted sophomorically and shoved the girl out of the way and scooted off the bus. Gretchen flew backward knocking over a few kids behind her in the process. "Hey!" Shouted a girl behind her.  
  
"I'm so sorry!" Clarified Gretchen wistfully as she helped herself to her feet. "Wait. . Where's my Bible?" Concerned Gretchen under her breath.  
  
"You're holding up the line!" Shouted a boy from the back of the bus. Gretchen fell to her knees and started searching, and spotted the Bible under her seat.  
  
"There it is!" She reached under the seat and abruptly the line started moving again. Despite Gretchen's body lying on the ground reaching for the book. "Ouch! Ow!" People stepped over and on her legs and back.  
  
"Stop it! I'm down here! Ouch! Your on my face!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~  
  
Inside the theater, the few children including Zim, that had already escaped the yellow, sad excuse for transportation had found some metal fold out chairs that were set up in a somewhat large "rehearsal" room to sit in.  
  
A considerably tall blond woman stood amongst the children holding a wooden clipboard and a black click pen, which she held next to her mouth as she eyed the paper, then the children. Her smooth blond hair was pulled back into a neat bun, her outfit was a gray dress suit with a matching jacket; to top off her look, she had black rimmed rectangular eyeglasses that sat comfortably at the end of her pointy nose.  
  
"WHERE are the rest of you little bags of flesh?" She suddenly spoke up; her voice was nasal and flat, matching her dour facial features perfectly. It wasn't even really like she had asked them, she hadn't really looked at anyone when the question was asked. The children just shrugged simultaneously. The woman sighed heavily and went back to staring at her clipboard.  
  
It wasn't long until the rest of the "bags of flesh" started piling into the room and plopped into any available seat. Gretchen was the last to drag herself into the room. Despite the limping and bruised torso, she was still smiling that same smile she always contained. Until her eyes met Zim's, then it faded slightly then she hugged her Bible closer and scuffed herself over to an open seat. Zim rolled his eyes. Pathetic human.  
  
"Finally!" Whined the woman, and backed into a seat nearby and crossed her legs. "All right, my name is Ms. Shickadance. I will be teaching you talent less little monsters how to act."  
  
'Great' Thought Zim, 'a miniature Ms. Bitters, that all I need. .'  
  
"Now for role call." Continued the obnoxiously surly woman,  
  
"Blink."  
  
"Here."  
  
"Kim."  
  
"Here."  
  
"Gretchen."  
  
"Here."  
  
"Cassika."  
  
"PRESENT!"  
  
"Je-"  
  
"But you pronounced my name wrong!"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"I go by Cassy, but the 'C' is silent."  
  
".. So your name is Assy?"  
  
"Yep! That's what the boys call me!"  
  
"You're a strange child."  
  
"Yep!"  
  
"Moving on.. Jessandra."  
  
"Here! And actually that was my weird sister you just called on.. She's weird."  
  
"I see.. Zim."  
  
"Sir!"  
  
"Good God you're GREEN!"  
  
"That I am. It's a skin condition AND I'M VERY SENSITIVE ABOUT IT!" Suddenly Zim started sobbing spuriously.  
  
"You need to work on your acting, green child!"  
  
"Eh?"  
  
  
  
**************************************************************************** **********  
  
  
  
After role call was finished, Ms. Shickadance passed out scripts to each of the children. Zim noticed the two girls who had made a scene during role call had to share the same script. Apparently, the Cassika one had eaten hers.  
  
"Now class, it is time for you all to show me the best acting you've got in you. If you are good, you will be rewarded with a leading role. If you are bad you will be punished with. a not so good role." Pause. "Decisions begin now!"  
  
Each child was given a line to read and put as convincing as possible. Unfortunately, one line couldn't possibly process that, but Ms. Shickadance was 'pressed for time' so it really didn't matter.  
  
"Blink, stand up and read line 27B on page 65, now!"  
  
Blink, a somewhat short in height boy jumped from his seat and scrambled to flip to the page. When he spotted the line he looked back at Ms. Shickadance oddly.  
  
"27B Ms. Shickadance?"  
  
"Yes. READ IT."  
  
Blink scratched at his florescent green hair awkwardly and cleared his throat.  
  
"My name is Bob."  
  
Ms. Shickadance clicked her pen and added something to her clipboard. She gave him a half smile and waved him off. Blink shook his head slightly and sat back down.  
  
"Kim, your next. Read line 43S on page 12."  
  
The overly dressed girl Kim, who had her black hair cropped into a messy bun to the back of her head stood up.  
  
"This mayonnaise has gone bad."  
  
"Thank you, Kim."  
  
Walking back to her seat, Kim was seen to be sobbing to some extent and muttering on how she spent hours practicing for this rehearsal. She happened to sit next to the tattered figure of Gretchen, who attempted to comfort Kim by patting her knee. Kim looked up to Gretchen then the Bible mottled with dirt resting on her lap.  
  
"What are you some kind of freak?"  
  
Ms. Shickadance let out an exasperated groan and called up the next child to practice.  
  
"Assy.."  
  
In a quick swift movement, "Assy" jumped up form her seat startling most of the other children causing them to twitch in their seats. The curly haired brunette bounced over towards Ms. Shickadance, hair whipping side to side as she approached the distraught woman.  
  
"Line 68C on page 75."  
  
Assy stared confused, "What?"  
  
"..Thank you for your time, please take your seat."  
  
"But what about my rehearsal?"  
  
"Lets just say, I have already reached my decision."  
  
Assy crossed her eyes, "Huh?"  
  
"TAKE YOUR SEAT!"  
  
"Okay!" Without further argument, the girl bounced back to her seat and slammed herself down on it extremely loudly.  
  
"Jessandra."  
  
The younger girl from before remained in her seat, staring blankly at the teacher.  
  
"JESSANDRA."  
  
She continued to stare, her baby blue eyes widened and vacant.  
  
"Thank you for your time. next is: Ahh, the green child."  
  
Zim took a correct assumption and stepped forward, dragging his feet.  
  
"Line 69Q on page 3."  
  
Zim flipped three pages and found his line, his eyes widened. Noooooooo. The teacher stared impatiently, clicking her pen insolently. Zim winced.  
  
"I have sexy cheese in my pants," He grumbled. The class snickered loudly, the Assy-girl was screaming. Literally. The Blink-boy chortled loudly. The Jessandra-girl stared blankly. The Kim-girl made a fake attempt to cover her mouth from laughter, she needed to work on her acting too.  
  
All but one was laughing, who could it be but Gretchen. Her face was shaped with a fully sympathetic exterior to it. Her eyes shined with a paper-thin layer of tears. "I feel for you," She mouthed, and clutched her cross necklace in her pale hand.  
  
GAG! Zim stomped over to his seat; the laughter was one thing, but sympathy from a despicable HUUMAN? YUCK! The class continued to chuckle and some whispered to another pointing at him.  
  
"Yes, yes laugh it up. I am forced to state a false fact about myself that is impractical beyond reason but HAHAHAAAA.. IT'S JUST SOO HILARIOUS TO YOU PEOPLE ISN'T IT??"  
  
The class fell silent for a few seconds but then a voice snapped up again:  
  
"HAHA! CHEESE!"  
  
A wave of giggles passed over the room again. Zim felt it slide over his head then pass out the door. All was silent again, Ms. Shickadance; who never moved position or expression the entire time, shifted position in her seat and signaled the continuance with the rehearsals.  
  
"Moving on.."  
  
**************************************************************************** **********  
  
  
  
After rehearsal, and character decision was complete, the group of children were back on the bus. Most were in the seats they had begun with; Zim in his "target for paintballs" seat, Gretchen close by Zim, and Assy on the roof.. Wow that was random.  
  
Sigh. Zim was yet again staring out the bus window, this time a little more relieved. 'At least it's over' He thought to himself. Suddenly, Zim perked his head up it felt like part of his seat had slightly sunken in next to him.  
  
"Hi Zim."  
  
He turned, "Oh, it's you.." He said with annoyance and turned back to the window.  
  
"So, you got the lead in the play?"  
  
"I did?"  
  
"Yes, weren't you paying attention when Ms. Shickadance announced our roles?"  
  
Zim stared at her blankly.  
  
"Guess not.."  
  
"Why are you even trying to start a conversation with the great Zim? I have no business with you, so leave me."  
  
Gretchen flashed him a syrupy smirk, one of her eyes was bruised and vaguely squinting. "That's a lot of lines to remember, do you need any help?"  
  
"NO. I am Zim; I NEED no HELP from the likes of YOU. Now GO AWAY."  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
Zim exhaled piercingly and leaned forward to the seat in front of him where a girl with dark brown hair and red and blond highlights in it, listening to a disc man; grooving to the music was sitting. Zim aimlessly grabbed the headphones right off her ears and put them on his to block out Gretchen's voice. She sighed and started to say something again. 'Good, now she's muted.' The only words Zim could hear now were the crazy music the girl seated in front him had playing in the disc man. The girl hadn't even noticed they were gone and continued to groove to herself.  
  
"Can't you see I'm easily bothered by persistence?  
  
One step from lashing out at you...  
  
You want in to get under my skin  
  
And call yourself a friend  
  
I've got more friends like you  
  
What do I do?  
  
Is there no standard anymore?  
  
What it takes, who I am, where I've been  
  
Belong  
  
You can't be something you're not  
  
Be yourself, by yourself  
  
Stay away from me  
  
A lesson learned in life  
  
Known from the dawn of time  
  
RE-SPECT, walk.."  
  
Zim, shrugged, he'd heard worse music than this, and it was a hell of a lot better than Gretchen's voice. Abruptly, the music was cut off. Zim looked over at Gretchen, who was still next to him, holding the headphones. She looked slightly annoyed now and leaned over to put the headphones back on their owner's head. When they were placed on the girl's ears, hastily she stopped grooving.  
  
"Who took my headphones?!"  
  
Talk about a delayed reaction.  
  
"Zim has no tolerance for your ignorance! LEAVE ME!"  
  
Gretchen sighed again, "I want to help you."  
  
Without hesitation, Zim shoved her out of the seat, leaving her flat on her butt in the seat aisle.  
  
"I warned you!" He shouted, shaking his fist. Gretchen dusted herself off and retreated to her first seat. Zim glared at her, she opened her Bible nonchalantly and began reading again. 'WIERDO' Thought Zim, frustrated. 'Zim needs no help; Zim is great of all things! How DARE she treat the Zim like some mediocre HUMAN?!?' He huffed and growled to himself, then practically jumping out of his skin when a another loud 'SPLAT!' hit his window.  
  
"CURSE YOUU!!"  
  
WOW that was stupid! Oh well R+R anyways! Did ya spot me?? Didja didja didja?? If you think you spotted me, leave a review and let me know! This mainly is based on who can tell me first, so whoever gets it first is added to the story, if there's a few other people who got it right to I will make 2nd place 3rd.. etc. For the winner I will need: Name: Appearance: Personality traits:  
  
You may add a few other stuff too but that's jus the basics k? k. Peace. 


	3. This chapter has nothing to do with Gret...

I just want to dance.. Is that a crime?  
  
Random voice: YES.  
  
ShiMMy: Is that who I think it is??  
  
Random voice: No.  
  
ShiMMy: Yes it is!! Random voice!!!! Care to listen to old school pop music from the late 90's that never mad it to the charts because it's halfway decent?  
  
Random voice: 5ive?  
  
ShiMMy: Yes.  
  
Random voice: No.  
  
ShiMMy: I hate you; you suck. Wanna get married?  
  
Random voice: What?!?!  
  
ShiMMy: I wanna marry you, use you for money, then divorce you, leaving you a broken man.  
  
Random voice: ..  
  
ShiMMy: Hey I had a contest didn't I?  
  
Random voice: Who the hell cares.  
  
ShiMMy: Obviously not you, but you don't matter; you don't even exist!  
  
Random voice: [GASP] I DO TOO!  
  
ShiMMy: Nope.  
  
Random voice: No0o0o0o0o-::fades away::  
  
ShiMMy: Uhh... Okay then.. Well the winner of the Spot the ShiMMy contest (the only person who bothered to participate) Celtic Angel!! Congratulations! For those of you thinking now, Ah! I'm such a dumbass! Why didn't I review this story and try to spot the almighty ShiMMy? She rocks! She rules all that is before me, I- ahem, any ways. I was the psycho with the headphones and the delayed reaction. yeah.  
  
  
  
A DOOM To Remember  
  
DESTINATION: ZIM'S BASE  
  
"Urgg!!! And THEN. AND THEN!!!! You JUST WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT, GIR!"  
  
The small white and aqua robot stared blankly at his enraged master. "MAYONAISSE!!!!"  
  
"No, GIR! NO mayonnaise!!"  
  
"WAA! Wait.. a minute.. yeah I forgot what we were doing.. I like bread n' butter.. yum.."  
  
"Never mind, Gir. Talking to you is like talking to a toaster. A RANDOM TOASTER!!"  
  
"I LIKE RANDOM TOAST!"  
  
Zim let out a growl and marched to his lab and flushed himself down the toilet entrance. Gir remained sitting on their kitchen table, still confused as to what just happened. Then he shrugged and started dancing and singing random nonsense. In other words, pop music.  
  
The next day.. WEEE!!!!!!  
  
DESTINATION: DOWNTOWN DOOKIE VILLE (Let's just call Zim & Dib's city Dookie Ville for now.. It fits doesn't it? DOESN'T IT???) THEATER, REHEARSAL  
  
"Now children! I want you all to practice your lines and actions.. Hence.. REHEARSAL! Yes.. Rehearsal.. I need a drink.."  
  
The play in it's own sense. sucked. No body in the class really understood it, especially Zim. Not that he tried to that is. Besides his lack of talent, interest, sanity, he was chosen for one of the lead roles. Heh, who knew? Zim stared blankly at his lines as the rest of the crew scrambled to get in their correct areas and positions. He remained standing confusedly by a bar table prop and stool.  
  
Next to him was a girl with short dark hair, fair skin, and wearing a white T-shirt with Frodo from "The lords of the rings" on it; She was also wearing blue flare jeans, which her baggy T-shirt was half tucked in. She eyed Zim.  
  
"You're .green."  
  
"Yes." Pause, "And you're blue."  
  
"No I'm not.."  
  
"SILENCE .YOU'RE. .Face hole. YOU!!!"  
  
She raised an eyebrow, "Quite the way with words, eh?"  
  
Just then, Ms. Shickadance stumbled up to the two, and stopped in front of them. "Ahh, my star pupils! How are the lines coming?"  
  
The girl crossed her arms and looked at her through shifted eyes. "Are you drunk?"  
  
"What? NO! What kind of a teacher would I be if I were to consume alcohol during a lesson?" A bottle of Scotch fell out of her pocket and smashed on the floor at that moment, almost splattering on Zim, who sprung his feet backward to the loud smash. Ms. Shickadance looked embarrassed, "W-WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?" She announced, attempting to sound unaware. The girl stared at her, unconvinced. Obviously.  
  
"Okay, okay! So I had a little drink before I got here is that a crime??" Her face started to sink, "Y-you see.. my boyfriend just broke up with me and.." A bottle of peppermint schnapps fell to the floor. "Okay so I don't HAVE a boyfriend I'm a raging alcoholic!"  
  
"Good job." Replied the girl giving a little clap. "The first step is admitting it."  
  
  
  
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~  
  
  
  
  
  
"But Esmerelda! I LOOOVE You!"  
  
"No! No! No! You're overacting again green child! You must put feeling into your words!" Shouted Ms. Shickadance as she approached him and Erin, the dark haired girl from before. "You must let your audience FEEL the emotions you have for Esmerelda, you love her!" She motioned towards Erin, also known as Esmerelda. "You MUST have her! She is your LIFE! And she's walking out on you! Read the lines again with FEELING!"  
  
Zim gritted his zipper teeth and rubbed his temples, they had been rehearsing this particular line for what seemed like hours. Erin yawned, listening him scream "I LOVE YOU!" for the past couple of hours was growing tiresome.  
  
She glanced at Zim; already having the line memorized at this point, "Oh Antonio, I just can't take it anymore! I'm leaving you for good!" She read somewhat jaded, but with enough enthusiasm to keep Ms. Shickadance happy, who was nodding approvingly.  
  
Zim's eyelid twitched, if this stupid rehearsal was going to end, it was going to end NOW. "BUT ESMERELDA!" He shrieked, throwing his clenched fists into the air, "I LOVE YOU!!!!" He then dramatically threw himself to the ground and started wailing and pounding his fists on the ground, then latched himself onto Erin's leg. Her eyes widened uncomfortably quirking an eyebrow.  
  
They looked to Ms. Shickadance for her final verdict.  
  
Unexpectedly, she threw her arms outward and beamed; "Now THAT'S what I've been looking for!"  
  
"Victory!"  
  
"Ms. Shickadance?"  
  
"Yes, Erin?"  
  
"Weren't you just yelling at him for OVER-acting?"  
  
".. Yes."  
  
"Well then what do you call that??" She motioned towards Zim, still clutching her leg.  
  
"Entertainment!" Shouted Ms. Shickadance, "Entertainment, my dear girl. He put FEELING into his words as he thrust himself to the ground to reveal his love for your character. It was brilliant!"  
  
Zim sprung from Erin's leg in one swift movement and pumped his fists again, "Victory! . Revised!"  
  
"Ms. Shickadance?"  
  
"What else is on your mind, Erin?"  
  
She stared hard at the teacher, "You're still drunk aren't you?"  
  
".. Yes."  
  
  
  
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I'm gunna leave it at that for now.. **Gets kicked by some unknown person** OW!! I'M SORRY! I am out of ideas and I'm fresh out of sanity! I must go now! -Thank you tons for the reviews people, sorry again for the delay and shortness of the chapter, the next will be better! I'm sure of it! .. I think. Oh well, hope you enjoyed it for the most part-  
  
Love, Peace, & Chicken Grease! ~ShiMMy123 


End file.

Invader Zim, Humor, Parody