Invader Zim Invader... Dib?!

Invader... Dib?!  
  
By: Cartman's Girl  
  
Notes: Based on an image I saw previously, and one I elaborated upon using my weird little mind. What would happen if Dib was the alien, Gaz was the robot, and Zim was the boy who knew too much? Well, here's the answer. Be afraid, be very afraid.  
  
~*~  
  
Irkens are indeed a strange breed of aliens. Their ruler is based on height, and so is everything else. The taller you are, the more respect you receive. The shorter you are, the more you're criticized and thrown around like a limp rag.  
  
Dib's life had been a big limp rag. Ever since he was brought to life, he had been short. Shorter then all the other Irkens around. Like Torque, Zeta, `M' and everyone else. His robot wasn't any help either. GAZ, as she was known (Gothic Android Z), was more interested in logging onto the satellite dish and playing against other SIR units on Irk.  
  
So Dib was pretty much alone on Irk, and the only thing he wanted to become as an Invader. He knew that Invader blood marched through his veins, like the Irks before him in his family line had been famous. Course, he couldn't proove this, what with being cloned and not naturally born like many other Irkens on the planet.  
  
Then the day came, Dib got his big break from the Tallest White.  
  
Who was Tallest White? Good question. Tallest White was the tallest Irk alive, thus making him the Ruler of the planet. No one had ever seen his full face, he wore a white armour which covered half his face, only revealing his goggled eyes and zigzagged antennae.  
  
But out of all the other Irkens there, he chose the shortest Irken named Dib to be in charge of Operation Ingenious Doom. But how could Tallest White know that Dib was forced into a local bar by GAZ, guzzled more then half his weight in Colbert Beer and end up raving drunk and attacking his own planet? Surely he couldn't have known.  
  
So, Dib was banished for his actions.  
  
You think the story ends here? HAH! Well you're wrong then! Very very wrong. For Dib returned one day, a day of the great Assigning. Course, he was more or less given the task to get out of the Great Tallest White's antennae for probably the rest of time.  
  
Course, Dib didn't know that...  
  
~*~  
  
"Hah, pathetic game android thinking it could beat me..." GAZ was stood besides her master, well she'd never call him master, in the Voot Runner. Her usual squinted eyes were now open and a hue of red. Obviously playing online with some poor fool.  
  
As for Dib, he looked bored out of his brain. His round glasses hung limply on his face, which is weird seeing as he has no nose.  
  
"GAZ stop that stupid game stuff." Dib said as he watched a star being born. Messy.  
  
"Don't mess with me Dib or I'll make you wish you had never been spawned." GAZ growled.  
  
"Right, right... I forgot who's master and who's slave here..." he muttered.  
  
~*~  
  
"Oh come ON! Beaten by again by this stupid GAZ person?!" Percy Membrane slammed his fist onto his computer desk. The eighteen year olds long purple hair, tied into a pony tail fell over his lavender eyes, and he quickly brushed it away.  
  
"Heh, you are such a looser if you loose to some chick." Percy's twin brother, Redmond commented from the other side of the room. Redmond looked just like Percy, only his hair was red and short, hidden under a baseball cap placed backwards on his head.  
  
"And quit makin' so much noise! I finally got stupid Gir to sleep. You know how long it-" Redmond was cut off by loud crying coming from another room. Percy grinned at his twin,  
  
"You were saying?" he asked,  
  
"No way man, it's your turn to rock that stupid thing to sleep and sing about Pigs and Burritos." Redmond said, grabbing Percy from the chair and throwing him away before sitting down himself. "This GAZ chick can't be that tough..."  
  
"Yeah yeah..." Percy slumped from the room, and soon entered the room of his four year old brother's room. It was painted blue, baby blue to be exact. The room was full of piggy toys, and other assorted goods. Curled up in a tight ball and screaming his lungs out, was Gir. Youngest member of the Membrane house hold, yet also the most annoying.  
  
"Ah Gir what's wrong with you now..." Percy picked his brother up out of the bed,  
  
"My burritos!" Gir wailed, "They all burned up by the mean fairy piggy!"  
  
"I'm sure..." Percy muttered. Man, he hated this. Ever since their folks had tied three years pervious him and Redmond had to watch out for Gir, and of course, their other brother...  
  
Zim. Zim was, weird to say the least. A black haired boy, he was into the paranormal in a big way. He believed their parents had been abducted by aliens, and never returned. Well, he had always been into aliens since he could talk. They blamed that on their Dad, who was a paranormal expert to begin with.  
  
Where was Zim now? Where he always was at night, sat on the roof of his house with a pair of headphones on his head listening in on radio signals coming from space.  
  
Then he picked it up...  
  
"GAZ, please! Stop playing with those stupid humans! We're nearing the planet now, and don't gimmie that death stuff or I'll just unplug you!"  
  
Zim's blue eyes widened in shock. The aliens...  
  
"They're coming!" Zim declared, he pointed up at the moon and spoke triumphantly, "YOU thought you could hide forever didn't you?!? Well you're wrong! The mighty might of the great and powerful ZIM MEMBRANE is onto you spooty heads!" with that, Zim leapt off the house, slid down the drainpipe and smashed in through the kitchen window, into an sink full of water.  
  
"Zim took the last soda... he will pay..." Percy still had the sobbing and hysterical Gir over his shoulder when Zim made his surprised entrance, and Percy glared at his younger brother.  
  
"Percy! You won't believe it, not in a million gillion bazillion years!" Zim hopped out of the sink and waved his gloved hands to his brother.  
  
"Lemme guess, aliens are coming?" Percy asked as he closed the door of the fridge.  
  
"...how did you know that?" Zim asked,  
  
"Because you say that EVERY night and EVERY night, nothing comes. And it's your turn to watch Gir." With that, Percy dumped Gir into Zim's arms and stormed off muttering about making toast.  
  
"Who's comin' Zimmy?" Gir asked as Zim placed him on the ground.  
  
"Aliens Gir... aliens..." Zim looked up at the night sky and lowered his eyes.  
  
"Ooooo! Like E.T!" Gir declared, "I like E.T he makes me feel all warm inside!"  
  
"No, not like E.T These are mean aliens, they want to take over this planet and make us their human slaves!" Zim explained as he shook the water from his boots.  
  
"Ooohhhhhhhh. I don get it."  
  
"I don't expect you to Gir... I don't expect you to." Zim looked up into the sky once more, and frowned. He knew they were out there, and now he was going to prove to the world...  
  
....  
  
Ooo the suspense! Yes, I am on a sugar high, and who knows if I'll continue this or not. You shall SEE! BWA-HA-HA-HA-HA-Man I got the munchies. 


End file.

Invader Zim, Humor