Homestuck 1. Wind up

-WARNING- There is going to be a fair bit of NSFW content in this fic. It's not humanstuck, so that means bulges, nooks, and other troll anatomy. If you're okay with that, read on~

"I suppose it is comfortable, but other than that I don't really see the point." Kankri said, tentatively lying further back on Cronus' large human bed. "I don't mean this as any sort of insult to your fascination with human culture, and in fact I've began to develop a bit of an interest in it myself." He added apologetically. "Also,-"

"that _is _the point, cheif. i'm telling you, these humans havwe some pretty good ideas." Cronus said, interrupting the ramble he could tell Kankri was about to launch. He reached up and casually draped and arm around Kankri's shoulders, and, to his surprise, the smaller troll leaned into him, resting his head on Cronus' shoulder.

It couldn't last though. This was as close, physically and emotionally, as Cronus had ever gotten to any troll, and he knew that Kankri wouldn't allow it to go any farther in either respect. Kankri's apologetic sigh came a little later than Cronus had expected, but it still came. Cronus ignored it, encircling his arms around the small, candy-red blooded toll. Kankri, or course, was having none of that. He pushed himself, gently but purposefully, out of Cronus' grip and stood, glancing back at Cronus with a slightly disapproving smile.

"Goodbye Cronus. I enjoyed our time together, and as usual, I found your extensive knowledge and willingness to discuss human culture quite stimulating." Kankri said sincerely.

Cronus bit his lip, trying, if only for a moment, to hold back the suggestive retort that had entered his mind, but he didn't try very hard. It was only Kankri, after all. And he expected this sort of thing from Cronus. Everyone did. "i bet i could show you one or two other things i'vwe learned about human culture that you'd find _stimulating._" He said, punctuating the suggestion with a wink.

Being dead, neither troll had pupils, but Cronus was pretty sure that even Kankri would have rolled his eyes at that one. He shook his head back and forth before disappearing out the door. Cronus sighed, laying back on his bed and staring at the ceiling. Here he was, alone again. Even his dancestor didn't want anything to do with him. But if Cronus was going to be alone, with out a single quadrant filled or even a friend, it wasn't going to be for lack of trying. Cronus wasn't too optimistic about his chances, but he still believed it could happen. He was the Bard of Hope, after all. If filling his quadrants was truly a lost cause, he would know.

After another couple of minutes, Cronus got up. He re-styled his hair, which had gotten a little tousled from laying around in bed all day, gave the mirror an experimental wink, grabbed his guitar, and headed out. He generally liked to lurk near the lawn rings of the higher or mid blooded trolls, where he often bumped into Aranea or Latula, but today he headed straight for the lower rings. A part of him was hoping to run into Kankri again, if only to have someone to talk to. But he clung to Kankri too much as it was, and he didn't want to end up driving away the only troll who would tolerate his company for more than a couple minutes at the time.

Cronus picked a fairly populated sport, right in the middle of a couple of busy, small lawnrings, where he was sure plenty of other trolls would see his. He sat, strumming his guitar and looking at those who passed by. No one stopped, and most, knowing him because he had made a move on them before or simply by reputation, threw him a disgusted look as they passed by. Most of these he returned with a slow suggestive wink or by licking his lip, which never got him more of a reaction than a slight recoil or perhaps a middle finger or fist shaken in his direction. Cronus wasn't too bothered by any of this. He was used to rejection, and little ones like this kept his mind off of the ones that really stung.

Needless to say, Cronus was a little surprised when someone actually approached him. He looked up to see the winged, red-and-back clad figure of Rufioh, wearing the same shy, slightly nervous grin he always did. Of course, Cronus wasn't about to read too much into it. Rufioh was probably here to tell him off for leering at him. Cronus took a hasty, anxious glance around, making sure that Rufioh's sweaty, intimidatingly muscular matesprit was nowhere in sight. Sure he wanted to talk to Rufioh, but it wasn't worth getting every bone in his body broken for a little conversation with a guy who wasn't even really a potential pail.

"So you play, huh?" Rufioh asked, sounding thoroughly uncomfortable. "I mean, of course you do. That's, uh- that's really cool man. " He said. He was fiddling anxiously with the hem of his vest, but his tone was growing steadily less nervous-sounding. "My dancestor, Tavros, plays. I always wanted to learn back when were were still alive, but I guess I just never got around to it." He said with a shrug.

"I could teach you a thing or two if you like." Cronus offered, not really expecting anything to come of it. Rufioh was going to say he really appreciated the offer but it really wasn't a big deal, or something like that. He'd backpedal and worm his way out of the conversation in the most non-confrontational manner possible. Because even if Rufioh wanted to take him up on this completely innocent offer, Horuss would never allow it.

"Yeah? Man, that's be great! I'm free whenever, if you really want to." Rufioh said, beaming. It took Cronus a minute to register what he had said. His shoulders had already slumped in anticipation of the rejection that he knew was coming. But then the words finally set it. Rufioh had said _yes. _Cronus' mouth hung open, his unlit cigarette falling to the ground. He realized that Rufioh was still rambling on. "Well, I mean, not _whenever. _Horuss is a little clingy -not that I mind of course!- but, uh, I'm sure we could work something out."

Cronus blinked, shaking his head back and forth. Why was Rufioh of all people talking to him? It didn't make sense. Still, Cronus figured he'd better try and make the best of the opportunity. "You got it, kittten. I'm not doing anything _now_."

"Bangarang! Do you want to go to my hive or what?" Rufioh asked enthusiastically.

"Mind going to mine? I know it's a little far, but I figured that would be better." Cronus said. He regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. Now Rufioh was just going to think he was trying to get in his pants. Of course, Cronus did _want_ to get in Rufioh's pants, but he'd ruled him out as a potential concupiscent quadrant sweeps ago. Making a flushed advance was a fine way to get beat to a pulp by Horuss, and even if Cronus could bring himself to hate the easy going, upbeat rustblood, he doubted Rufioh had the capacity to hate anyone.

"Oh! Yeah, I'm cool with that." Rufioh said, giving Cronus a bashful grin, and giving him a once over looking at him with something hungry and intense that Cronus was unfamiliar with being the subject of. Was it desire? No, that couldn't be it. And even if it was, it wasn't like it was a big deal. Rufioh flirted with everyone.

I'll go get my guitar and meet you at your hive, okay?" Rufioh said, pulling Cronus out of his reverie. Cronus' was sure his face was flushed a deep violet at he searched for an answer.

"Sounds good, chief." Cronus said at last, waving to Rufioh before collecting his guitar and heading hurriedly back in the direction of his hive.

When Cronus arrived back at his hive, he collapsed just inside the door. He knew he should clean up; dirty clothing and dishes were strewn all over the place, but he was too preoccupied to do so at the moment. He couldn't get the memory of Rufioh's gaze. Cronus took a couple of deep breaths to calm himself down. He tried to preoccupy himself with tidying his hive, and he was progressively less agitated when Rufioh showed up twenty minutes later.

"Hey," Rufioh said, giving a Cronus his usual timid grin. Cronus tried to not to stare, still hardly believing that there was another troll- aside from Kankri, and Porrim, that is- willingly standing on his doorstep.

"Come on in, chief." He offered, beckoning Rufioh into the main room of his hive.

Rufioh glanced around as he went, but didn't seem to be bothered by the clutter. Cronus gestured to the couch and Rufioh took a seat. Cronus had been avoiding Rufioh's gaze since the bronze blood had arrived, but now he forced their blank white gazes to meet.

Rufioh looked at Cronus with the same hungry look he had before- if anything it had grown more intense. He set his guitar aside and beckoned for Cronus to join him. His bulge was already beginning to come unsheathed, and he panicked- What if he had misunderstood Rufioh?

Any questions Cronus might have had about Rufioh's intentions disappeared as Rufioh slid himself into his' lap. His face wash a deep, flushed bronze and his breath had grown heavy. He leaned in, placing a firm, urgent kiss on the seadewllers' lips. His kisses grew faster and more urgent, and soon Cronus felt the entirely welcome presence of Rufioh's tongue in his mouth.

At fist Cronus had been too stunned to act, but he took control now, wrapping his arms around Rufioh and slowly grinding their hips together. His bulge was now fully unsheathed and he moved his hands to fee it from the confines of his tight jeans, but Rufioh stopped him, wrapping his hands around Cronus' wrists and raising them up above is head. Cronus let out a whimper of protest but Rufioh silenced it with another lingering kiss.

Rufioh pulled Cronus' shirt off before removing his own. Cronus smirked a little, as Rufioh struggled to get it over his cumbersome horns, before taking in the bronze blood, his eyes raking over the bare skin of the troll in front of him. Rufioh began to kiss his jawline, then his neck, then his collarbone. Rufioh pulled Cronus tighter, and the seadweller marveled at the warmth of the bronze blood's skin. He had resumed the steady rocking of his hips, his bulge squirming around in his jeans.

And then Rufioh did was Cronus had feared he would. He pulled away with a heavy sigh.

"Look Cronus, I'm really enjoying myself, but..." He trailed off uncomfortably. "I'm not flushed for you, and I don't think you're flushed for me. And I'm pretty sure this isn't black either. Even if one of us did have red feeling for the other, um, even then this wouldn't be right. I already have a matesprit." Rufioh said with a touch of reluctance.

Cronus wasn't going to pretend he wasn't disappointed, but it's not like he would force himself on Rufioh. He hadn't even been thinking about quadrants, and he kicked himself for thinking that this could really happen, especially with someone like Rufioh.

"Sorry about that, chief." Cronus muttered, trying not to feel resentful of Rufioh. Still, even he didn't deserve to be lead on like that. Rufioh had been right, of course, but he should have thought of that before he decided to grind his damn bulge all over Cronus.

"Yeah, me too." Rufioh said, getting up without meeting Cronus' eyes. His entire face was still flushed bronze, but weather is was from shame, arousal, or a combination of both, was unclear. He picked up his shirt, carefully pulling in on around his horns, and left without another word.

AN: This chapter was mostly Crofioh, but there will be more Cronkri soon I promise! Thanks for reading.


	2. Warmth

Cronus had been avoiding Rufioh for days. Every time he caught a glance of the winged troll his face got hot. And he felt that he had a valid reason for why he was avoiding the bronze blood. Cronus was ashamed, but in all honesty, it was more an act of self-preservation than anything else. Rufioh hadn't said anything about Horuss when he left Cronus' hive. It wasn't as if he'd promised to keep what had happened between them a secret from his matesprit. And he knew how Rufioh cracked under pressure. If Horuss became even the slightest bit suspicious, Cronus was dead. That left him avoiding the blue blood in addition to Rufioh, and Meulin as well just for good measure. It wasn't too difficult, because no one really wanted to talk to him anyways, but it made Cronus feel lonelier than ever. Cronus had figured that he might as well stay in his hive.

Cronus didn't, however, have any sort of explanation as to avoiding the one troll who- before Rufioh had come along, at least- would willingly associate with him. Kankri had come to see him twice, and he had pretended he was not at home. The few times when Cronus had seen him out and about he had swiftly turned the other way. When Kankri waved, he pretended not to notice. He knew this would probably pass, he just needed a day or two. After all, he had no reason to be ashamed to face Kankri. Kankri didn't even know what had passed between him and Rufioh.

The sun would be coming up soon, so most trolls were heading back to their hives. Cronus had done very little all night; mostly just moped around and slept, but he was getting antsy now. He took a long, slow soak in the bath, hoping that would make him feel better, but it did nothing to help.

He'd been plucking away on his guitar, alternating between soft, quiet tunes and louder, more rowdy ones, when he heard a knock on his door. He hadn't been expecting anyone to stop by this late. Cronus silently cursed himself. He's been making a bit of a racket, playing his guitar and singing, too, so he couldn't exactly pretend he wasn't home. It was probably just Porrim, though. At least, that was what he was hoping for. That would be the best-case scenario. Worst case, it was Horuss, ready to rip him to shreds, having discovered what Cronus had done with his matesprit. He padded quietly to the door and pressed and ear against it, tying to be quiet, so as not to give himself away.

"Cronus, I know you're in there. Porrim and I are beginning to worry about you." It was Kankri. Cronus felt a wave of relief followed immediately by a stab of guilt. Kankri shouldn't be worrying about Cronus, but he was the only one who ever really did. He suspected even the thing about Porrim wasn't completely truthful. Suddenly, Cronus felt horribly sheepish. He was avoiding the one person who truly cared, and he didn't even know why. Cronus sighed and straightened up, pausing to make sure his hair was okay -more out of habit than anything else- and opened the door for Kankri. The small troll was dressed in one of his usual candy red sweaters, and was looking concerned a little nervous.

"Come on in, cheif," Cronus said weakly. He threw Kankri a couple of anxious glances as he led him in, but didn't meet his gaze. Kankri made his way to the couch, but at the memory of what had happened there between him and Rufioh he instead steered the smaller troll to his respite block, motioning to the bed. Kankri kicked of his shoes and climbed on the the bed, sitting cross-legged in the middle. He cast Cronus a sideways glance, clearly expecting the violet-blood to join him, and after a moment he did, sitting at the head of the bed to one side of Kankri. Kankri turned around and gave Cronus a serious, searching look, and Cronus couldn't help but blush under his scrutiny.

"I would have thought youd've been out and about by now. No ones heard from you, not even Meenah. Porrim hasn't seen you in days. We're worried about you." Kankri leaned forward an put both hands on the larger troll's shoulders.

The sudden physical contact surprised Cronus; Kankri didn't like being touched, and he certainly didn't seek out physical contact with others. But then he remembered that this wasn't the first time in the past couple of days- no the past couple of weeks- that he'd gotten physically close to Kankri. It was never long before Kankri pulled away from his touch, though.

But this time that didn't happen. Cronus reached up and placed his hands over Kankri's, finding their warmth surprisingly comforting. He remembered marveling at the heat of Rufioh's skin, and Rufioh shuddering at first at his cool touch, but Kankri didn't seem to be affected by it at all, even given the larger contrast between their body temperatures. He slipped their hands down a little further, holding them away from his body a little so his arms weren't at such an awkward angle.

"I didn't mean to wvorry you, chief." Cronus said, by way of apology. "But I'm fine."

"Well, I'm glad you're alright. I was worried." Kankri repeated. "I would like, if you don't mind, to speak with you. It's nothing pressing, but I really was concerned, and, forgive me for saying to, but you still don't seem like yourself. If something has happened, I urge you to feel free to speak with me about the matter. Is it perhaps something triggered by your descendant? I had an exceptionally easy time bonding with Karkat, but many from our session have not had the ease that I had, and I can see how one might potentially see that as a reflection of ones self worth, seeing as most trolls as able to get along with themselves, and in a way, of course, our descendants are versions of ourselves, but I urge you not to see it that way, for that sort of view can be extremely detrimental to the self-esteem of both onesself and ones descendant." He paused his self-assured prattling and a flicker of nervousness passed accross his face, before asking a question.

"Have you been avoiding me?" Cronus felt sick. Kankri _knew. _Presumably not everything, but he knew that Cronus was avoiding him. Well, at least Kankri hadn't beat around the bush about it.

"'Course not, chief. I just haven't seen you around. If anything, I'd say you'vwe been avwoiding me." Cronus said. He didn't know where the second part came from, not only because he had been avoiding Kankri and Kankri been seeking him out, but Kankri had no reason to avoid Cronus, and Cronus had no reason to think he was. Cronus had no real excuse and he knew it, so he used the first retort that came to mind, which unfortunately was dreadful and didn't make any sense. He tensed, mentally preparing himself for a lecture on how his hurtful behavior was or something to that effect.

But Kankri _laughed. _Cronus was shocked. He didn't think he'd ever heard Kankri laugh before. Is was a high, carefree sound that didn't seem to suit the small, serious troll. Cronus' eyes narrowed.

"Look chief, I didn't ask you to come here and if your gonna laugh at me wvhile I'm poring my blood pusher out to you I'll shut my trap. But you're the one that came crying to me, not the other wvay around." Cronus snapped irritably.

"I'm sorry Cronus, I truly am. I believe that my laughter was simultaneously a response to relief that you are in fact alright and stress due to the fact that you seem to be angry with me. I was worried about you. I meant no offense. I am deeply sorry if it seems that I have been avoiding you, but I can assure you that is not the case." Kankri said looking apologetic and thoroughly distressed. Cronus felt bad. He had worried Kankri, then laughed at him, then made him feel guilty when Cronus was the one at fault.

"No wvorries, chief." Cronus said, but he didn't launch into the long apology that was on the tip of his tongue. This conversation was already too serious for his liking. Kankri would probably be able t go on and on about why that was if he knew, but thankfully, he didn't.

"I haven't offended you, have I Cronus?" Kankri asked anxiously.

Cronus gave Kankri a baffled stare. "Wvhat do you mean?"

"Well, you seemed to have been keeping your distance, but as we established, that was merely a coincidence, so I will consider it all in the past, however, you seem to be particularly disgruntled. I sincerely hope that I have not said anything that would cause you to feel triggered in our recent conversations, but as I lean towards discussion of more sensitive topics, I often end up going over some highly triggering subjects, and of course I make it my business to become familiar with the triggers of anyone who I intend to engage in such discussions with. I thought, until recently, that I was familiar with all your triggers, but now I fear I may have left something out, or done something to upset you in some other way." Kankri said, inhaling a little as he finished the long statement.

Cronus felt horrible. He shook his head, giving Kankri's hands a gentle squeeze. He didn't deserve this. He was being completely horrible, and Kankri was worried about him.

"I'm sorry chief. I don't knowv wvhat to say." Cronus said, his tone a mournful cross between remorse and self-pity. This whole visit had been a disaster, and it was getting worse and worse. "I havwe been avwoiding you but only because no one really vwants to be around me anyways." What was he saying? That sounded like something _Eridan _would say. "I guess I vwas just havwing a couple of off days. Forgivwe me?" He asked, flashing Kankri his most charming smile. It had never worked before, but he figured it was worth a shot.

Kankri sighed, giving Cronus a tired smile. "There is nothing to forgive." He assured the seadweller. Cronus sighed in relief, giving Kankri's hands another small squeeze. At this point the smaller troll seemed to suddenly realize that there was less than a foot of space between them, never mind that Cronus' hands were clasped firmly around his. His face flushed bright red, and for a moment he simply stared up at Cronus. Then, suddenly, he broke away, taking a hasty step back and averting his gaze.

Cronus sighed. He was making Kankri uncomfortable. Again. Usually he didn't mind. Cronus just sort of had that effect on other trolls. But with Kankri, he felt bad. Still, he wished that Kankri would loosen up a little, as much for his own good as anyone else's. Being totally tight-laced all the time couldn't be any fun.

He stepped towards Kankri again, this time completely closing the gap between them. Kankri's entire face had gone bright red, and something pulled at Cronus' chest. He didn't seem as uncomfortable as Cronus had expected, and there was a hint of wonder on his face. Cronus, on the other hand, was at a complete loss for what to do. He felt a little light headed. Something was off, but he couldn't put his finger on what.

"Listen chief, I think you should go." Cronus said quietly. He didn't want Kankri to leave, but he didn't know what else to do. He didn't understand what he was feeling.

Kankri nodded, silent for once. Cronus knew this couldn't be the case, but he could have sworn that Kankri looked a little disappointed. But that couldn't be right. It had to be his imagination.


	3. Guilt

Cronus had been a nervous wreck all week, but he'd tried to keep a brave face. And after a couple of days he had calmed down enough to start making the rounds again. He wasn't quite back to his usual, flirtatious self, but he was getting there. But when he saw Kankri talking to Horuss off all trolls, he began to get anxious.

The two trolls were in the upper rings, among a collection of large, sparsely populated lawn rings. Cronus had only recently headed out from his hive, hair freshly slicked and guitar tuned and in tow when he'd spotted them, deep in some sort of conversation that seemed rather serious.

For a moment, Cronus was completely horrified. Rufioh must have caved and told Horuss about their little almost-tryst. And now he was hunting Cronus down to skin him alive. Of course he would go to Kankri to help locate the seadweller; he was pretty much the only troll who willingly associated with him.

But then it passed just like that. For one thing, if Horuss did know about him and Rufioh, he probably would have beat Cronus to a pulp by now. For another, it wasn't as if Kankri had never witnessed any of his concupiscent solicitations before. If he were harboring some sort of secret disgust for Cronus because of them, it would probably be evident.

And then Horuss laughed and Kankri smiled, and Cronus knew he hadn't been found out. They both looked up and saw him, and Kankri waved. Cronus sauntered over, trying not to appear as thoroughly disgusted with himself as he felt.

"I must thank you. I continuously strive to make myself more cultured, and this discussion has been particularly illuminating. I greatly appreciate your unique input." Horuss said before turning to Cronus. The seadweller's heart skipped a beat, and he hoped that the broad smile plastered on the blue-blood's face was a good sign. "If you'll excuse me, I must be going. I have a prior engagement with Meulin." He said, bowing slightly. Cronus nodded and, thankfully, he took his leave.

"Are you alight?" Kankri asked, not quiet meeting Cronus' gaze. "You seem a little jumpy lately" The simplicity of the phrasing, and the lack of apology or further explanation, caught Cronus' attention. Kankri was right, though evidently Cronus wasn't the only one acting strangely as of late.

"'Course I am," He said, trying to appear calm. "You seem avwfully concerned all of a sudden. You're not by any chance wvaxing a little pale for me, are you?" Cronus teased in an attempt to at least sound like his usual self.

A bright red blush crawled across Kankri's face. "No. Of course not. It's nothing of the sort, and honestly I find the suggesting mildly upsetting. I don't believe that I have ever displayed any behavior towards you that could have been considered pale solicitation, and if I did, it was completely unintentional."

Cronus felt like he'd been punched in the gut. With the way that Kankri was stammering and blushing, it looked like he'd hit his mark. And that should have been a good thing. He'd finally be able to fill one of his quadrants. He'd said before he wouldn't mind filling most of his quadrants with pretty much any troll, with a couple of exception, and it wasn't like he had any issues with Kankri. On the contrary, Cronus was growing incredibly fond of him.

"Vwell, if you say so I guess I vwon't press the issue." He said with an affected casual air. Kankri pursed his lips, looking thoroughly upset. "Hey, c'om Wvantants, don't get your panties in a tvwist. I was just kidding around."

"I'm fine. I know you meant it in good fun and I didn't take any offense to what you said." Kankri said, sounding a little defensive. It was odd, seeing him like this. Kankri wasn't usually one to cover up his feelings, but he was obviously hiding something. Cronus worried that he really had upset him, but clearly pressing the issue wasn't going to do him any good weather or not that was the case. He decided it would be wisest to let it drop.

"Would you mind if I came over to your hive? There is something I would like to discuss with you, and I would prefer if we did so in private, and that it be kept in confidence between the two of us." Kankri said. His expression was bordering on distraught and he seemed more agitated than usual. This couldn't be good. Cronus heaved a heavy sigh knowing figuring he might as well. It wasn't like he'd be able to just go back to avoiding Kankri after this.

"Sure thing, chief." He said, trying to swallow the lump in his throat. Kankri turned without another word and headed in the direction of Cronus' hive, remaining uncharacteristically silent. He didn't even look at Cronus save for a few glances back to make sure he was still there.

"Novw, vwhat's going on here? You ask me to come over an novw you're giwving me the cold shoulder! You're sending some seriously mixed signals, babe." Cronus said, catching up to Kankri and taking him by the arm, forcefully turning him around so the two trolls were face to face. He dropped Kankri's arm hastily, remembering that he didn't like to be touched.

Kankri's expression went from agitated to desperate and Cronus couldn't help but feel a little bad. He didn't know how much more of this he could take.

"Please, let's just go to your hive! I'll explain everything once we get there. Please just wait." Kankri said forcefully. Cronus sighed, allowing himself to fall behind Kankri a little.

Kankri picked up the pace, and they continued on in silence for the few remaining minutes it took them to reach Cronus' hive. It was only at this point that he wondered why Kankri had specified that they go to _his_ hive. He led now, ushering Kankri in. Without thinking, he led him to his respite block, where they had spent most of their time last time Kankri had come over. Kankri didn't seem mind; he was still visibly anxious and upset. After a moment of gazing nervously about the room, the shorter troll fixed his gaze on Cronus. Cronus noted that his face had become bright red.

"Cronus." Kankri sighed, his voice intense but uncharacteristically quiet. Cronus stepped a little closer to the small troll- though not nearly as close as he wanted to- And gave him an inquisitive glance.

"I have come to the conclusion that I have-" He paused, clearing his throat lightly "That the nature of our relationship has changed significantly as of late. And I think- I don't want you to get the wrong idea, but you are making it difficult not to engage you. I you're right. I owe it to you to explain why I've kept my distance."

Cronus threw up his hands. "Vwhy _hawve_ you been awvoding me?!" He felt bed for talking to Kankri like this, but he was going crazy not knowing what was going on. Still, he didn't deserve it, even if he had been avoiding Cronus. He didn't want to push himself on anyone.

Kankri sighed, glancing anxiously around the room and chewing at the inside of his cheek. All this silence for the usually loquacious troll was starting to freak Cronus out.

"Newvermind." Cronus said, heaving a heavy sigh. He'd made Kankri uncomfortable. Again. Cronus sighed, wondering how long it would be before he'd scare him off for good.

"May I?" Kankri said after a moment, inclining his head towards the bed where he had sat last time. It was all Cronus could do to nod wordlessly.

Cronus stayed in the doorway, nervously regarding Kankri, who sighed, avoiding the seadweller's gaze.

"I wanted to talk to you all week, but you seemed so jumpy whenever I was around. Are you sure that I haven't done anything to upset you? Or perhaps you were simply feeling out of sorts? I wondered-" Kankri was interrupted by a knock on Cronus' door. Cronus was going to ignore it, but Kankri looked immensely relieved. "Please. It would be rude of me to ask you to keep from answering. If you were intending on doing so on my account please don't worry about it. I simply wanted to make sure that I hadn't offended you."

Cronus reached out to put his hands on Kankri's shoulders but thought better of it. "Don't go anywhere, chief." He said, more because the pounding on his door was growing louder and more insistent than anything else. He told would deal with whoever it was as quickly as possible and then get back to Kankri. That shouldn't be too hard; Cronus was good at repelling people.

Cronus was only vaguely surprised to see the winged troll standing on is doorstep. "I changed my mind." Rufioh said in a slightly husky whisper.

Cronus was grateful that Kankri was in his respite block, because before Cronus had time to ask what Rufioh had meant by that, he pulled the seadweller into a deep kiss. Cronus broke the kiss off scarcely before it had begun, pulling away and ignoring Rufioh's confused look and whine of protest.

Cronus was torn. Rufioh was totally throwing himself at him, but he also wanted to get to the bottom of whatever was going on with Kankri. Cronus was aware that this was only the second time that this had happened, and that Rufioh hadn't promised him anything. He had no idea how long this was going to last. Cronus sighed.

"Can you come back in a couple minutes? Kankri's owver..." Cronus said quietly, feeling a little queasy for some reason he couldn't quite place. He was probably just anxious about getting caught with Rufioh though.

"Oh yeah. Sh-t, I didn't mean to interrupt anything. It can wait if it's really..." Rufioh said with an understanding and slightly sheepish-looking grin.

"No no, I want you to come back!" Cronus said sincerely, trying not to sound too desperate.

Rufioh grinned before flyng off, and even though Cronus knew he wasn't flushed for him, he could certainly see what others saw in the bronze blood. He had this contagious enthusiasm and great shoulders and a smile that made you want to conspire with him. He had a rugged sort of come-away-with-me charm that promised all sorts of delightful adventures. He was kind and tried to be good and honest even though he didn't always succeed, and there was something down-to-earth and sincere about him.

Cronus turned and headed back to his respite block. Kankri was still there, curled in a ball on his bed, looking oddly relaxed. He tensed up a little when Cronus entered the room, but not as much as usual. Cronus decided he would go along with it and sat and the head of the bed, placing a hand of Kankri's shoulder. Kankri closed his eyes, his brows knitting together ever so slightly, but he didn't protest to the physical contact. It struck Cronus that that was another thing that he had been weird about recently.

"You aren't avoiding me?" Kankri asked quietly. That was it. Just a simple question. No explanations or apologies. Cronus felt worse than ever. Kankri had to be really messed up about something. But why wasn't he talking to Porrim about it? They obviously had some sort of pale thing going on, even if neither one had openly acknowledged it yet.

"Of course not, chief. Guess wve'wve just been missing each other." Cronus said, feeling dreadful about lying, and about whatever was going on with Rufioh, and about the fact that all he wanted to do right now was scoop Kankri into his arms and kiss him until he didn't have a single doubt left in his mind that Cronus still cared for him, even though that would never happen, and at this point it felt like every conversation he had with Kankri was under false pretenses.

Kankri sighed, but then a faint smile played across his lips, his shoulders loosened, and Cronus knew that Kankri believed him, or at the very least forgave him. A guilty relief flooded his entire body. But something was definitely still wrong.

Cronus kicked off his shoes and lay down on the edge of the bed, facing Kankri. Kankri slowly straightened his legs and leaned into Cronus for a moment before pulling away and drawing a sharp breath. His eyes were closed now, and he was still wearing a faint smile that masked some sort of hidden worry.

"Well, I'm relieved. It worries me when you hesitate to add your own opinions to our discussions." Kankri said. Cronus waited for more, but there was nothing else. Evidently he wasn't the only one being unusually quiet.

Cronus couldn't escape an odd, guilty feeling. It didn't make sense, but it was there all the same. He felt like he had wronged Kankri in some irreparable way. He felt sick and confused and his mind kept wandering back to how Rufioh's lips had felt against his and for some reason that made him feel like he'd done even worse by Kankri. There was something in Rufioh's smile when he'd left the had made him feel _something_ though. Cronus just couldn't work out what it was.

Whatever it was, Cronus was beginning to feel that nothing good would come with this thing with Rufioh.


	4. Small comforts

In the end, Rufioh didn't come back. Cronus spent a couple of hours anxiously glancing out the window and listening for the door, but after a while he sort of forgot about it. There was never a lull in the conversation with Kankri, and Cronus found himself paying more attention than he usually would.

"And anyways, I think having a palemate would be good for you." Kankri concluded the long lecture, giving Cronus a concerned, knowing look. Cronus wasn't even sure how they'd gotten around to discussing his quadrants, but here they were. Cronus swallowed, the warm glow of contentment and comfort that he had been basking in moments earlier rapidly evaporating.

"You vwoulenteering, Vwantas?" Cronus asked, trying not to sound panicked. The fact was that this was not the first time that the topic of moirallegiance had come up between him and Kankri in the past couple of days. Maybe Kankri had taken his joking advace the other day seriously. But what about his thing with Porrim? Kankri and Porrim weren't openly pale, but they'd been close for a long time, and he doubted that Kankri would drop their relationship just like that, especially for someone like Cronus. Then again, maybe he'd been reading too much into that relationship.

"Of course not." Kankri scoffed, bringing a hand to his mouth. "I was just expressing a little completely platonic concern for your emotional well being." He said defensively. Cronus pursed his lips, looking Kankri full on, trying to evaluate the level of truth to his statement. He wasn't sure if Kankri meant it or not, but he figured he was being sincere, so he shrugged it off. At least he didn't freak out like last time. Cronus still wondered what was up with that. Kankri wasn't exactly emotionally stable at all times, but Cronus just didn't get why he'd get so uncomfortable about the joke he'd made. He knew that Kankri was celibate, but he didn't understand why he'd be so worried about a conciliatory quadrant.

Kankri held his gaze for the briefest of moments before looking away. He shoved his hands in his pockets, his eyebrows coming together as the slightest bit of a frown touched the corners of his mouth. Cronus wanted to shrug it off, but he felt like that was what he always did when Kankri was in one of his moods, and it hadn't really gotten either of them anywhere thus far. Not that addressing the issue had either, but if it was all the same, Cronus preferred to feel like he was at least making an effort.

"Vwhat about you, cheif? You'vwe been a little off lately too." Cronus countered, changing the subject. Usually he didn't mind being the center of attention, but he wasn't feeling up to hashing out his quadrants at the moment, due not only to the fact that they remained empty as usual, but also the recent conflicting of his own feelings.

Kankri's slight frown graduated into a scowl. He'd never been good at hiding his feelings, but it'd been a while since Cronus had seen him like this."I've been fine. I honestly have to idea what you're talking about." Kankri said, turning his head in a slightly wounded gesture that Cronus got the impression was a bit forced.

"Vwhatever you say, chief." Cronus said, trying not to be suspicious. After all, he really couldn't imagine Kankri having any reason to be anything but completely honest with him.

Kankri didn't reply for once, just nodded, stifling a yawn and shifting to a more comfortable position on Cronus' couch. Cronus had noticed that Kankri had seemed a lot more comfortable here lately, and it made him happy. He'd always worried that Kankri merely tolerated him because no one else would. It was nice seeing him like this, all relaxed and content-looking. He's been so jumpy and anxious around Cronus lately. The seadweller had worried he's finally pushed Kankri too far, and he was relieved to see that this didn't appear t be the case after all.

Kankri stretched and yawned again. Cronus knew he should offer to walk him back to his hive or something, but he didn't want Kankri to leave just yet. It was odd, seeing as just moments before he had seemed so guarded and agitated. It was more weird behavior for sure, but Cronus figured he could take it for granted for now. Kankri wasn't usually one to hold back, and it worried him a little that he seemed to be doing so now, so the seadweller hoped that the fact that his companion was so relaxed now was a good sign.

Eventually, Kankri dozed off, leaning his head against the seadweller's shoulder. Cronus smiled fondly. He toyed with the idea of carrying Kankri to bed and taking the couch himself, not wanting him to wake up with a stiff neck, but he knew that Kankri would probably be uncomfortable with that. Cronus felt himself beginning to doze off, but he didn't feel compelled to move. Kankri shifted closer, and though he knew he shouldn't, Cronus wrapped his hand's around Kankri's. He fell asleep with a pair of small, warm hands in his, feeling happier than he'd been since before he died.

When Cronus woke up he was alone. He sighed. Cronus had known that what ever had passed between Kankri the previous day wasn't likely to last, but he couldn't help feeling a little disappointed. The memories of their most recent interaction sent a soft purple blush and a warm smile across his face. The fact that Kankri had probably woken up and felt to uncomfortable to stay was a bit of a buzzkill though. Cronus tried to tell himself that Kankri had probably just promised he's go meet Porrim at a certain time or something, and he hadn't wanted to wake Cronus up, but he knew that he was probably just being generous with himself.

Cronus sighed, getting up and heading to take a shower, washing the dried pomade out of his hair and enjoying the feel of the hot water on him skin. As he did he thought, as he did an awful lot lately, about Kankri.

Cronus really wished he had someone to talk to about this thing with Kankri, whatever it was. Between worrying about him and Rufioh, it seemed like he could never relax anymore.

Cronus sat up, and idea popping into his head. He knew that talking to Kankri about his feelings towards him was not likely to get him anywhere, but he _could_ talk to Rufioh about whatever was going on there. Worst case scenario Horuss would be there and he'd get the tar beaten out of him, but hey, even that had to hurt less than _dying_, right?

With that in mind, Cronus got up and headed to Rufioh's hive. He peeked around nervously, but no one was around outside. Taking a few deep breaths, Cronus gave a timid knock.

"Hang on!" Rufioh called from somewhere within his hive. Cronus held his breath, hoping that he was alone. After another moment Rufioh answered the door. His mohawk wasn't gelled, and it flopped loosely to one side, and there were a few traces of sopor slime starting to dry on his face and bare chest.

"Oh. Uh, hey Cronus. What's up?" Rufioh asked, sounding a little more anxious than usual. He stifled a yawn and beckoned Cronus inside, closing the door behind him.

"Shit cheif, I didn't mean to wvake you up..." He said, a sheepish smile creeping it's way onto his face. Rufioh shrugged, motioning to his couch and Cronus took a seat.

"Hey, no worries. It's all good." He said, taking a seat on the couch and waiting for Cronus to join him. Cronus did after a moment, but he was at a loss as to what to say. He'd come to visit Rufioh and now all he could do was stare at his hands.

"Listen Cheif, I..." Cronus sighed, not sure how to go about putting his feelings into words. "I can leave if you wvant me to. I just wvanted somebody to talk to." Cronus mumbled, blushing a deep violet. He felt embarrassed to admit it, but then again, Rufioh probably already knew that he didn't have any friends. And Rufioh _had _reached out to him, in a way. Plus, oddly enough, Rufioh really didn't seem to mind.

"Nah man, it's cool. Lay it on me." Rufioh said, flashing Cronus a reassuring grin. Cronus tentatively bit his lip, unsure where to start.

"Normally, if I had to talk to anyone about something that wvas bothering me I'd go to Kankri. I mean, I guess I'll sort of talk to anyone, and it's not so much that _he_ cares evwen, but he listen. Hell, usually I'll earn a lecture for my trouble, but it's nice all the same." Cronus sighed. He felt a twisting in the pit of his stomach as his mention of Kankri brought the troll's face to mind. "A- anywvays, I guess I wvas a little wvorried about the other day." He confessed, knowing that Rufioh would know what he meant.

"Oh. Yeah man, sorry about that. I meant to come back, but then I got back to my hive and Horuss was there, and then thing got a little... Ahaha, anyways, I've just had a lotta other stuff going on since then. I guess I kinda forgot..." Rufioh confessed sheepishly, laughing a little.

"Wvow, that actually wvasn't what I meant. I wvasn't evwen wvorrying about that, I kind of had other stuff on my mind I guess. Mostly I guess I just wvanted to make sure that wve wvere cool and all." He said, giving Rufioh an anxious smile.

Rufioh smiled, looking relieved. "Yeah. We're cool." He leaned back and closed his eyes. Ghosts didn't really need to sleep, though most of them did anyways, but Rufioh certainly looked tired. Cronus wondered briefly what sort of stuff Rufioh had been dealing with that left him so distracted. It occurred to him that it was probably Horuss; as far as he knew they were still together, but there had been rumors that things weren't going so well with them. Plus, as far as Cronus knew, Rufioh hadn't told Horuss that the two of them had messed around a little, but he worried that he would...

"So uh, I guess that was all I really wvanted to talk to you about. I mean, I'm sure you'vwe got you're owvn shit to deal wvith. Wvhat's evwen up wvith you and Horuss, anywvays? I assume you didn't tell him..." Cronus trailed off Although the second part of what he's said was a valid concern that likely pertained directly to his own welfare, Rufioh's quadrants really had nothing to do with him.

"Nah. I mean, I figure I should eventually. Not that anything actually happened, I mean, not really, but uh, yeah, I'm still trying to work on that whole honestly thing, so I figure I should say something. Also, I've been thinking it'd probably be a good idea to break it off with Horuss. Maybe I should break it off first and then tell him or something..." Rufioh said, rambling a little at this point. Cronus wasn't really surprised that Rufioh wanted to end things with Horuss, but he didn't really understand why Rufioh had decided to tell him. Not that Cronus minded. It was nice to have someone to talk to who wasn't just trying to get the conversation over with as quickly as possible.

"Wvell, bearing my personal safety in mind, I'd rather you tell him after you'vwe chucked him, or better yet not at all, but I guess I you should just go with wvhat wvorks. It might be good to do it all at once, just to get it all over wvith." The thought of Rufioh telling Cronus made the seadweller's stomach twist up with fright, but he knew that to ask him not to would be selfish.

"Yeah? Maybe you've got a point there..." Rufioh mumbled, frowning a little. After a moment he looked up at Cronus, cocking his head to the side slightly. "So uh, why didn't you go to Kankri?" Rufioh asked, coming back to Cronus' earlier statement. A violet blush spread across his face, and his stomach twisted up. But why not tell Rufioh? Rufioh had just told him all of his relationship problems completely unprovoked, even if they did sort of have to do with him.

"I don't knovw." Cronus said, though it was only partially true. "I guess I wvas a little ashamed. Not of you or anything, just sort of... It's _Kankri,_ you knowv?" Cronus asked, though his cheeks grew a little colored and he knew that, for whatever reason, the phrase "It's Kankri" held somewhat of a different significance for him that it did for Rufioh. "I mean, he's great and all, and I'm sure he'd be fine talking about it, even though he'd probably just end up lecturing me," Cronus added with a small smile. "But I just... It would be weird to talk to him about that sort of thing."_  
_

"I guess. I dunno, I thought you guys were pretty close or something though." Rufioh said with a shrug. "For a while it seemed like you were a little pale for him." This seemed to make the bronze blood a little uncomfortable, though Cronus couldn't imagine why.

"P-pale?" Cronus stammered. "Do you think I came off that way to him?" Maybe that was why it had come up. Cronus couldn't imagine any reason for Kankri to think that he had been paleflirting, but that fit in with their earlier conversation.

"I don't know man. I don't even really know Kankri." Rufioh said with a shurg. "You aren't though, are you? Uh, pale for him, that is..." The winged troll asked awkwardly, flashing Cronus an earnest, questioning look.

"Of course not!" Cronus said. He tried not to sound panicked, but his voice shot up a whole octave anyhow. After taking a deep breath he calmed down a little though. "Actually..." Cronus paused, but he found he was okay with telling Rufioh everything. It wasn't just because Rufioh had already made himself vulnerable by sharing his secrets. Cronus wanted to share with Rufioh. He wanted to keep talking to him and hold on to the feeling of camaraderie they'd formed before Rufioh came to his senses and left.

"Wvell, I think I might be a little flushed for him." It felt good to say it. Finally he was able to get at least a little bit of what was bothering off his chest. Cronus looked Rufioh square in the eyes tensed for his reaction. Well, he wast laughing, so at least there was that. Actually, he looked a little relieved. Cronus figured Rufioh had been pretty worried that the seadweller was flushed for _him. _

"Wow. Oh man, well, good luck with that, I guess? If that even applies here. I mean, are you gonna try to go for it? Not that it was anything to do with you, but, I feel like that might not be the best idea, you know? But I guess you could try... What do you think you want to do about it?" Rufioh asked, sounding genuinely conceded. Cronus felt flattered and a little cheap.

"I don't knowv. I don't think that making a mowve will get me anywhere, so... just try and ignore it until it goes awvay I guess." Cronus shrugged.

"Well, I'm sure you know better than me. I've never been in this situation. But... Well, it kind of seems like, even if you did try to make a move and Kankri wasn't into it he'd forgive you pretty quick. I can't seem him staying mad as long as you made sure you didn't, you know... take it too far." Rufioh said, the last part in an apologetic mumble. "Anyways, I should probably... Horuss is coming over soon and I need to, I dunno, prepare myself. I guess I just gotta grit my teeth and do it, but that didn't work out so well, haha."

"Sure thing, Cheif. Good luck." Cronus said not to sound whiny. The conversation has lasted a lot longer than expected, and it had been really nice. But of course, unlike Cronus, Rufioh actually had a life. And clearly he really need to deal with this thing with Horuss. Cronus flashed Rufioh a genuine grin and showed himself out.

It was a small comfort, but Cronus was glad that he finally had someone to talk to that he didn't have to hold back with. Someone who genuinely seemed like they enjoyed having him around.

AN: We really see any Cronus/Rufioh interaction in the comic, but I feel like they would have gotten along pretty well. I like writing flushed stuff, but I think that pale interactions can be pretty sweet too (in case y'all couldn't tell where THAT was headed) I hope you've enjoyed the fic thus far!


	5. Almost everything

Not for the first time over the past couple of days, Cronus had woken up feeling unusually happy and relaxed. He'd gone gone over to Rufioh's hive twice that week, and on the days he hadn't Cronus had ended up at Rufioh's. Rufioh had taken Cronus up on his offer for guitar lessons, and while he wasn't the fastest learner, it was fun. They'd watched a few of Cronus' favorite human films, and some or Rufioh's troll anime, neither of which the other had been a huge fan of, but that wasn't too bad either. Mostly Cronus was just happy to have some company. And Rufioh was nice, and easy to get along with.

After a moment though, Cronus' euphoria was punctured by a pang of nervousness. He took a deep, steadying breath and got out of bed, grabbing a fresh change of clothing before heading off to the shower.

Cronus turned the hot water up almost all the way, letting his muscles relax and his breath steady as much as possible. Honestly, Cronus wasn't even really sure what he was freaking out about. He was going to see Kankri again today, and for some reason that made him anxious. But it wasn't like this meeting was any different from their previous ones. Sure, Kankri had asked him specifically about it ahead of time, and it had been his idea, when usually it was the seadweller who would seek out the other troll, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. At least, that was what Cronus was trying to convince himself of for about the millionth time since receiving Kankri's message the day before.

After Cronus had showered, dressed, and styled his hair- a little less meticulously than usual after realizing he was running late- he grabbed his guitar and his tapre of Grease and headed out. He spent half the walk to Kankri's hive dragging his feet, worried about what this encounter would entail and how, seeing as subtlety wasn't exactly his strong suit, he was going to keep his feeling a secret, and the other half practically sprinting, anxious to see Kankri again.

In the end, Cronus ended up showing up at Kankri's hive right on time. He stood on the doorstep for a few moments before knocking. Kankri opened the door dressed in his usual red sweater though the evening was fairly warm. He smiled soflty, waving Cronus in.

"I'm glad you could come. It seems as though you've been keeping yourself busy lately." Kankri said, heading to the main room of his hive and taking a seat on the lovesat. Cronus joined him, glancing around the room for a few moments before meeting Kankri's gaze.

"Me? Oh yeah, I guess I havwe. I'vwe been wvorking on a lot of music lately and..." Cronus trailed off with a small shrug, unsure of weather or not to bring up Rufioh. He still felt a little weird about the way their friendship had started. Normally this was the sort of thing he would have loved to brag about, but for some reason Cronus felt at though he should keep it private. "I'vwe been spending a lot of time with Rufioh. You knowv, jamming out and stuff." He said with a shrug, trying to play it off was less of a big deal than he felt it was. Which made him feel like a bit of a jerk.

Kankri's eyebrows came together a little, a slight frown touching the corners of his mouth. "I see..." After a moment he seemed to shake it off though, putting his shoulders back and his chin up, and seeming very much his usual self. "That's good. I'm glad to hear that the two of you have become close."

"Yeah, it's been pretty great." Cronus admitted. "I'vwe missed our talks though. And I'm sure you'vwe been pining awvay for me, havwen't you?" He teased, throwing a somewhat affected smirk in Kankri's direction.

Kankri blushed slightly, avoiding Cronus' gaze. "Yes, I most certainly have missed our discussions." He said, ignoring Cronus' jibe. "You look well, though. For a while I was worried. Not to imply that anything was wrong, but you did seem rather out of sorts for a while."

Cronus blushed as well, feeling relieved and a little flattered that Kankri was worried about him. "It was no big deal, chief. Everyone has their off days, I guess." He sat back a little, growing more confident and comfortable. Kankri was leaning towards him a little, his posture much more open than usual. Cronus felt a surge of pleasure, nothing once again that the other troll seemed to be growing more comfortable around him. Maybe whatever weirdness had passed between them was really over with, on Kankri's end of things at the very least.

"Can I hear the music?" The question was abrupt, coming after a short lapse of silence. It took Cronus a moment to process Kankri's seeming non-sequitor request. Then he remembered that he'd mentioned that he'd been working on a couple of pieces. In truth, it had mostly been an excuse as to why he'd been avoiding Kankri, but he did have a couple of more recent pieces he knew that Kankri hadn't heard before.

"Sure thing cheif." He said, getting up and throwing Kankri a quick wink before heading towards the entrance of Kankri's hive where he'd left his notebook and guitar. He was a little nervous. Sure, Cronus shared his music all the time, often times regardless of weather his audience was actually willing or not, but he couldn't remember the last time he'd shared a work in progress. Cronus tried to tell himself that was the only thing he was nervous about.

The song, unlike most of his others, was in a major key. He played the wordless progression of chords, nervously glancing up at Kankri now and again. By halfway through the song their gazes were locked together. It got a little awkward in Cronus' opinion, by mercifully Kankri closed his eyes, leaning his head back a little. Cronus played the last few chords and then set his guitar aside, waiting for Kankri to say something.

"That was lovely. It sounded a bit different from your usual pieces, but I liked it. I'm sorry- I don't know much about music, so I don't feel I can say much beyond that." Kankri said, smiling and blushing a little; presumably over his lack of musical knowledge.

Cronus shrugged. "Wvell I'm glad it meets your approval, chief." He said, trying to sound like Kankri's praise was no big deal, when in reality his words made Cronus' whole face flush with pleasure. Kankri's praise hadn't been overwhelming or elaborate, but it seemed genuine, and that was enough for him. "I guess it is a little different from wvhat I usually play, but I'vwe been wvanting to branch out for a wvhile." He said, but left it at that. Most people didn't really talk to Cronus, let alone take an actual interest in his music, so when someone did he had the tendency to go on and on about it. Cronus held his tongue now though, not wanting to bore Kankri.

"Well, I think you should. It sounded wonderful, and of course, it's always important to broaden one's horizons. Speaking of which-" He said, glancing pointedly at the VHS tape that Cronus had set next to his guitar case.

"You sure you're down for this, cheif? I mean, I'd be perfectly okay wvith wvatching one of your movwies too." Cronus offered, picking up the tape and putting in into Kankri's TV before grabbing the remote and settling into Kankri's loveseat. Kankri sat down tentatively beside him, posture perfectly erect, as though he were trying extra hard not to touch Cronus. Which was likely the case. Cronus pressed play, trying not to be put out by Kankri's apparent discomfort.

"Don't worry- we'll have plenty of time to broaden _your _horizons later. Besides we're at my hive, so maybe we can watch one of my films when we're through with this one. But what I have is mainly documentaries on Beforan societies- although I've been working on getting my hands on as many regarding the cultures of both Earth and Alternia as possible,- and I figured that sort of thing would likely bore you."

Cronus raised an eyebrow. Kankri cared about a lot of things, but if his lectures were anything to go by, not boring people probably wasn't high on the list. "I might be into one of the human ones." Cronus said. Kankri nodded and turned his attention to the screen. Cronus tried to focus on the opening sequence- though at this point he'd seen the film so many times he'd memorized the whole thing start to finish- but he was suddenly aware that Kankri was beginning to relax, and that the foot or so of space between them was rapidly closing.

Twenty minutes into the film Kankri was snuggled up to Cronus. Cronus threw his arm around Kankri, trying to seem casual about it, and trying not to panic. The smaller troll initially froze up as the physical contact, but after a moment he relaxed almost completely, resting his head on Cronus' shoulder. It struck Cronus as a little odd, but he wasn't about to say anything.

Kankri watched the film with rapt attention, which rather surprised Cronus. He hadn't figured it would be his type of deal, but he guess it had more to do with curiosity about human social norm than the actual plot. Still, Cronus was glad that he seemed to be enjoying himself.

"You can spend the night, if you want. I mean, obviously I only have the one recuperacoon, but I figured you might be more comfortable on the loveseat anyways. It's a little small, but it might be better considering you're used to your human bed..." Kankri muttered, obviously half asleep.

"I don't knowv about that, Cheif." Cronus muttered. He was feeling more and more disingenuous by the second.

Kankri froze up again before sitting bolt upright and shrugging out from under Cronus' arm. Cronus had figured it was only a matter of time before that happened, but there was something off in Kankri's face. It wasn't the usual agitation at physical contact; he looked genuinely distressed and oddly frustrated.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable with my offer." He said, avoiding Cronus' gaze.

"Hey, hey. I just didn't wvant to put you out, that's all." Cronus said, instinctively reaching for Kankri's shoulders again but then stopping himself. Kankri turned his whole body around to that he was facing towards Cronus, and the seadweller found his heart was pounding in his chest. "Ah shit. I screwved up again, didn't I?" He groaned, unable to help it. "Look, I'll just leavwe it, alright?"

"You've been acting so strange lately Cronus. Are you sure you're alright? I mean, I though it seemed like you were doing better, but now I have to wonder." Kankri said, his brow furrowing ever so slightly. "You haven't ruined anything though. Not so far as I am concerned." The last past was unusually quiet for Kankri, and Cronus almost didn't hear it.

Kankri sighed, giving Cronus a long, melancholy look that Cronus could make neither head nor tails of. "Wvhat's going on here, cheif?" Cronus asked. He was sick of all this weirdness with Kankri. He was ready to give up on their friendship, not when it looked like it was finally beginning to take hold, but he worried that he might have to. It was just too stressful. And getting so close to Kankri when he had no idea of his feelings... It felt _wrong. _And them a though occurred to him. If he was going to give up anyways...

"Look. I've been doing a lot of thinking about our relationship, and, well, I'd be lying if I were to say that I was anything but flushed for you." Kankri said, seeming more agitated than ever.

It took a moment for the words to sink in, but once they did, Cronus acted on impulse. Before he was fully aware of what he was doing he was taking Kankri in his arms, pulling him halfway into his lap in the process, and pressing a deep, passionate kiss to his lips. Cronus was completely elated.

For a second, Cronus had almost everything he wanted.

Kankri broke the kiss off almost immediately, his whole face bright red. He stared at Cronus, obviously completely flustered. "But I do not think I can be your matesprit."


	6. Compromises

Cronus had't expected it to go like this. Everything was completely backwards. He had what he wanted, but it was all twisted around in a way that didn't make sense. He was unable to do anything but gape, completely baffled and more than a little wounded, for a moment, while Kankri stared down at his hands, his face flushed bright red right up to the collar of his matching turtleneck.

"I don't understand." Cronus said truthfully. He didn't understand what Kankri meant when he was flushed for him but he couldn't be his matesprit. He didn't understand why Kankri was flushed for him in the first place. What he did understand was the pain in his chest and the hollow feeling in his stomach. He'd come closer to having a matesprit than ever, and it had been ripped away from him. He'd believed, for that brief moment that Kankri's confession of his feelings would be the start of something new and wonderful, and, to be honest, it was probably one of the happiest moments he'd had since he was a wriggler. It was certainly the happiest he'd been since he'd stopped believing in magic.

"I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention to confuse you. It's just that..." Kankri's face was flushed an even deeper red than it had been before. "I have... flushed _feelings _for you. But, as I'm sure you are well aware, I am celibate. And though in most cases I'd consider it of the utmost importance to put my feelings first, my commitment to my path of celibacy is absolute." Kankri said, looking melancholy and thoroughly embarrassed.

Cronus shrugged, tying to look like he cared that Kankri was celibate much less than he actually did. It was definitely disappointing, but it wasn't by any means a deal breaker. A matespritship without pailing? He could do that. It wasn't ideal, but it wasn't like anyone else was throwing themselves at his flushed quadrant, after all. And he was flushed for Kankri. That much was painfully obvious. He still had the black quadrant to fill, and Cronus decided that that would just have to be enough for him. Besides, no one had to _know_ that he and Kankri weren't paling. Cronus saw this as a halfway decent compromise. And wasn't it an old saying that compromise was the most important thing to have in a flushed relationship?

"Wvell I can respect that." Cronus said, trying not to sound hurt but not succeeding entirely. "Don't wvorry about it." He tightened his grip on Kankri, pulling him the rest of the way into his lap and placing a soft kiss of his forehead. Kankri sighed.

"Are you sure? Not that I'm making any assumptions about your motives or honesty, of course, but I know that this is probably not exactly what you had in mind for one of your concupiscent quadrants." Kankri muttered, burying his face in Cronus' shoulder. "I don't want you to feel like you feel like you're compromising what you really want for my sake."

"Yeah. Don't wvorry about it, cheif." Cronus mumbled. He couldn't believe his luck. At this point, Cronus had started to think that he'd never fill his quadrants. And when he'd realized he was actually flushed for Kankri he'd figured he didn't have a chance. But here they were. Cronus hummed happily, relived that everything had worked out.

Cronus took Kankri's face gently in both his hands, pressing another soft kiss to his lips. Kankri seemed a little hesitant, but after a moment he reciprocated returning Cronus' kisses with eager and slightly sloppy ones of his own. The heat of his mouth felt so good on Cronus' and he was making the softest, sweetest little mewling sounds, though it was obvious that he was trying to hold them back. If Kankri was okay with this, well for now this was more than enough.

Kankri pulled away again, giving Cronus a small smile and sliding off his lap, leaning to the side a little to rest his head on Cronus' shoulder.

"I do have... One condition regarding our matespritship." Kankri said, sounding a little unsure. Cronus braced himself, not really that worried, but certainly curious as to what it was.

"Well, I would prefer if we maybe kept it a secret." Kankri mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper. He avoided Cronus' gaze, staring at his own hands.

And Cronus tried not to be offended. He really did. For all he knew, it wasn't because Kankri was ashamed of him. Maybe he did have a perfectly good reason for wanting to keep it a secret. But Cronus couldn't imagine what it was.

"Oh, come on chief! I thought you liked me. I thought you wvere flushed for me." He said, unfortunately sounding a little more whiny than wounded. "Nowv you're saying you wvant to keep it a secret? That nobody can knowv that wve're together? I thought wve wvere through wivth all the mixed signals crap!"

Kankri jumped a little at Cronus' outburst and he immediately felt bad. "I am flushed for you. And I want to be with you. But well, the other's might... misunderstand. I intend to tell Porrim, at least- I don't think trying to keep it a secret from her would really do any good- but I don't want anyone to know because they'd make assumptions. I mean, we are in a flushed relationship, and it wouldn't be too out of line to assume that two trolls that were flushed for each other were..." Kankri trailed off, his entire face flushed bright red. "You understand that I am committed to a path of celibacy, but the other's might assume otherwise."

"So wvhat if they assume?" Cronus grumbled. He was a little ashamed to admit that he had been secretly hoping that would be the case. Kankri just gave him a sharp look, and he gave in. "Okay, okay. I vwon't tell anyone. Except maybe Rufioh if that's okay wvith you. I mean, you sad you'd tell Porrim and..." He shrugged.

Kankri raised his eyebrows delicately. "I see. You are Rufioh seem to be awfully close lately. It sounds like you've become rather close friends fairly quickly. I suppose it's a good thing for you that you've become such good friends."

"I don't know that I'd say that wve're 'such good friends'" Cronus said slightly dismissively, though truth be told he was becoming rather attached to Rufioh. He remembered this was the second time that his relationship with Rufioh had come up, and he didn't want to dwell on it. Not now, when he was finally starting to figure the rest of his feelings out. "But he's just about the only person I really talk to besides you."

"Well, that's nice." Kankri said. Cronus expected Kankri to say more- he figured that with their feelings out it the air things would be less awkward between them, but his matesprit was still being oddly quiet.

Cronus decided to take advantage of the silence rather than attempting to fill it. He took Kankri's face in his hands and twisted his torso so that the to of them were face to face, kissing him full on the lips but otherwise keeping it fairly chaste, knowing that if he didn't ease into it he was likely to startle Kankri.

Kankri was less hesitant to reciprocate this time, though he was still a little timid. He matched Cronus' pressure on his lips, locking his arms around his neck and angling his torso closer to the other troll. Cronus hadn't expected Kankri to be the one to pull closer, and he lost his balance, tumbling forwards onto the other troll. It had been an accident, and a perfectly nice one in Cronus' opinion, but, giving the little annoyed sound he made in the back of his throat, his matesprit disagreed.

Kankri pulled away, his expression guilty self-indulgent rather than angry or uncomfortable as Cronus' had expected it to be. "Not that this isn't nice, but... It's a bit much for me." He said, resting his forehead against Cronus'. Cronus sighed, rolling over a little so that his own back was against the back of the couch and Kankri's was pressed against his front. He pushed the collar of Kankri's sweater aside so that he could kiss Kankri's neck, eliciting a few sharp gasps followed by a contented sigh.

"Do you wvant me to stop?" Cronus murmured into Kankri's neck. He really, really hoped that the answer was no. However, after another moment Kankri squirmed and nodded.

"No..." Kankri twisted around and pressed his lips to Cronus'. "Well, yes, I suppose I do. This is just going to take some getting used to. Remember that this is all very new for me. I'm feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment."

Cronus nodded, leaning into Kankri's neck and listening to the throbbing of his pulse. It was strange really, how little had changed for the trolls physically since they'd died. They still ate and slept and cried and everything Cronus was feeling right now, right down to the fluttering in his matesprit's chest that matched his own told him that they were alive. But they weren't. Cronus had long since accepted this, and it was the first time it had felt in any way strange to him in a very long time. Sometimes Cronus felt that the game had robbed him of a normal death, but today he was glad. It had yet to give him a second chance in life, but this was close enough.

"It's cool. Wve can do something else." Cronus said. He wanted to keep going, but he was still happy to go pretty much whatever with Kankri.

They ended up watching another on of Kankri's documentaries, this time one about Alternian society. Cronus didn't really pay attention, and he ended up dozing off about halfway through it.

"It's so brutal. No wonder those kids continue to cling to the hemospectrum- they've been taught to fear doing otherwise their whole lives. I tried to be so accepting of my ancestor and his peers, and didn't understand his hospitality or the treatment I received from some of the others, but I'm beginning to understand now. I underestimated the level of oppression, seeing it as largely self-imposed, and am beginning to see how deeply internalized and ingrained in Alternian culture, and by extension, the identities of trolls who grew up on Alternia. I had hoped that perhaps we wouldn't be treated with the same caution that Alternian youngsters use with adult troll, but now I see that we must-" Cronus wasn't sure how long Kankri had been talking. The movie was over, and he'd spent the better part of it mostly if not entirely unconscious.

"Yeah. I guess wve got pretty lucky." Cronus mumbled, not awake enough to contribute anything more in-depth. He wrapped his arms around Kankri and moved the collar of his sweater aside to softly kiss his neck. Kankri sighed, disentangling himself from Cronus and rising from the couch.

"I need some air. Would you like to join me for a walk?" Kankri invited, holding out his hands. Cronus nodded, rinsing from the couch and taking Kankri's hands in his own, turning each one over and kissing the palm in turn, before dropping one of them and leading his matesprit out into the night. He dropped Cronus' hand once they exited his hive though, and Cronus tried not to feel hurt. Looked like they were still going with the secrecy thing then.

The cold air felt sharp on Cronus's skin, but it was nice sharpness. He felt the last dregs of sleepiness laving his body. Kankri had wandered ahead, and Cronus watched with a contented warmth steadily growing in his chest. He really did care for Kankri. He wondered at how comfortable Kankri had been with getting close to him physically once they'd admitted their flushed feelings for one another. It was a compromise on both sides of things, but that was what matesprits did, right? They gave things up to make each other happy. He wondered how long they could balance, with each of them giving up a little bit of what they wanted to attain the larger whole. But he didn't dwell on it. For now, they seemed to be working their way towards finding their rhythm with of give and take.


	7. Learning Experience

Kankri had held fast in his insisting that Cronus kept their matespritship a secret. He'd told Porrim though, and as skeptical as she seemed of the whole thing, she'd taken it better than Cronus had imagined she would. Okay, so maybe she'd threatened various form of dismemberment if his intentions towards Kankri turned out to be anything less than pristinely pure, but at least she hadn't kicked his ass then and there. There had been a moment when she'd drawn herself up to her full height and given him this stone-cold glare, where Cronus had been sure he was toast. But then it had passed, and for the time being it seemed that she would at least tolerate his relationship with Kankri.

Kankri was a little surprised when Cronus asked if he could tell Rufioh though. They'd been snuggling on the couch at Cronus' after a movie night. He had already been thinking about it when Kankri brought up Porrim.

"I thought maybe it'd be nice for the three of us to have dinner or something. I mean, clearly you've seen her since I told her about our recent entering of the flushed quadrant, but we haven't really had the time to talk all together." Kankri said looking a little anxious.

Cronus smiled, kissing Kankri lightly on the forehead. Already he was could tell that Kankri was growing more comfortable being in close physical contact with him. Cronus sometimes worried that he got too affectionate, and sometimes Kankri did end up pushing him away, claiming that it was too much for him. But he'd stuck with Cronus, and Cronus was gradually beginning to learn what his limits were.

"You got it chief. But wvould you mind if I invwited Rufioh as wvell?" He asked. "I wvas planning on maybe saying something wvhen wve sawv each other again. I mean, he knewv I wvas flushed for you before wve managed to wvork things out, so..." Cronus shrugged. He was playing down his read on the relationship, but more for fear that it would turn out that Rufioh didn't actually feel the same way that he did than anything else. But he wanted Rufioh to be there. A part of it was that he wanted a buffer between himself and Porrim, but it was more than that.

Kankri frowned, looking mildly confused. But then he smiled, shrugging his shoulders slightly. "Why not? The more the merrier, I always say." Cronus ginned, relived. "But... You two are pale, aren't you? I mean, I kind of figured you were just judging from the way that you talk about him. But I wanted to make sure, so as not to end up making untrue statements based on my assumption that could end up embarrassing, or worse, triggering, one or both of you."

"Wvell, neither one of us had evwer said it in so many wvords, so I guess I can only speak for myself here, but I'vwe been wvaxing pretty pale for the guy." Cronus admitted.

Kankri smiled. "I certainly have no qualms with it. I hope things work out for you two. I don't really know Rufioh, but you seem like you could use a moirail, and you could certainly do worse. Provided you are comfortable with it, I'd encourage you to invite him as well. How about I speak to Porrim and you to Rufioh, and between the two of use we can try to find a date that's agreeable to everyone? Unless you feel the need to cement your relationship with Rufioh beforehand, in which case take all the time you need. I would not want to push you into a pale double-date before you two had actually established a moiraliegence, lest one of you felt triggered in light of your yet-unstated relationship. "

"Wvell, I wvas planning on saying something to Rufioh anywvays, so don't wvoryy about it." Cronus said. Sure, maybe that meant that's he'd have to act sooner that he' planned- having been a bit preoccupied with a different quadrant as of late- but he didn't see it as much of an issue. Even if he didn't return Cronus' feelings, Rufioh was a pretty mellow guy, and Cronus couldn't imagine him freaking out about it.

Kankri smiled, evidently satisfied with the arrangement. "Alright then. I'm looking forward to it." He looked as though he were about to keep going, but Cronus interrupted him with a kiss. Kankri barely tensed at all this time, relaxing quickly. Cronus began to kiss him more fiercely, rolling over so he was on top of his matesprit, pinning him to the couch. His hands wrapped around Kankri's waist while his knee gently guided his legs apart. This was new, and Cronus knew he should ask, but he wanted to keep going.

Kankri pulled away from Cronus slightly. "Cronus..." His entire face was flushed bright red and he looked thoroughly uncomfortable Cronus had figured that meant it was back to cuddling, and what came next caught him completely off guard. "I wanted to maybe try... going a little further." Kankri muttered, not meeting Cronus' gaze.

Cronus' heart skipped a beat. He hadn't expected this at all, let alone so soon into their matespritship. But Kankri never hesitated to make it known when something made him uncomfortable, so he knew he wasn't just doing this to please Cronus.

Cronus didn't respond, just scooped Kankri up and carried him swiftly into his respite block, setting him down on the bed. He sat down on the edge, giving Kankri a slightly anxious grin.

Kankri gave Cronus a nod and a small smile and he scooted forwards to the head of the bed. He cupped Kankri's face in one hand and kissed him gently, placing his other hand the small of his back and pulling him close. It was easy for Cronus to loose himself in the heat and steady rhythm of Kankri's kisses. They were slower and deeper than usual, a change which Cronus readily welcomed.

Cronus worked his tongue in between Kankri's lips, rolling on to his side so that he and Kankri were properly facing each other and moving his other hand to Kankri's back while letting the first one slowly draw down Kankri's hip to rest on his thigh. Kankri inhaled sharply, pulling away slightly, but only for a moment. After a brief pause his lips returned to Cronus' and he pressed himself against Cronus, his hands working their way into his hair. Cronus took this as a cue that it was okay to move things forwards. He gently tugged at the hem of Kankri's sweater, and he pulled away for a moment to remove it. With the high turtleneck of the sweater out of the way Cronus was able to move his lips down to Kankri's neck. He started by placing soft kisses on either side, gently sucking or biting every once and a while and thoroughly enjoying the little squeaks and gasps that escaped Kankri's lips as he did.

"I..." Cronus slowed his kisses as Kankri spoke but didn't stop. He knew if Kankri had something on his mind he's say it sooner or later. He seemed to be enjoying himself, and he hadn't told Cronus to stop. Cronus pulled off his own shirt before trailing a hand down Kankri's thigh and between his knees before working it back up to the top of Kankri's high waisted pants and pushing the button through the loop.

Cronus untucked Kankri's black long-sleeved shirt from his pants, marveling slightly at the fact that he could wear that long sleeved shirt under his thick knit sweater and not get overheated. His skin certainly felt warm enough under Cronus' touch. Cronus looked up, metting Kankri's gaze. His face was flushed bright crimson and he looked completely flustered, gazing wide eyed at Cronus with a timid and slightly awed expression on of face. Cronus leaned forwards to place a kiss at the base of his matesprit's horn before working his shirt up off his head, quickly following with his own.

Kankri bowed his head, and after a moment Cronus's felt his matesprit's lips on his throat. He let out a soft sigh as Kankri began tentatively sucking and nipping at the sensitive skin around his gills. Cronus let his hands wander down Kankri's back, lingering along his grub scars. He could already feel his bulge coming unsheathed and his nook growing wet. He decided to take a chance and roll is hips up towards Kankri.

Kankri responded with a soft chirrup, but then Cronus felt him place his hands against his chest and push away slightly. Cronus sighed.

"Wvas that too much?" He asked, trying not to sound disappointed.

"A little, yeah. It was my fault." Kankri said, sounding a little shaken. He had hidden his face behind his hands, and was shrinking back into the pillows.

"No wvorries. It wvas nice." Cronus said, kissing one of Kankri's horns before leaning back, figuring he should give his matesprit a little space.

Kankri dropped his hands, giving Cronus a sleepy, contented smile. "Well, I would thank you for indulging me, but it seems we both befitted from the experience. I certainly learned a lot."

"Oh, and I suppose that's all you got out of it. Clearly this wvas some sort of experiment on your part, purely for the sake of furthering your knowvledge." Cronus teased, turning his face away from Kankri. "And I suppose you'd havwe me believe that all those little noises you wvere making wvere merely _scientific observwations._" He continued in a mockingly melodramatic tone.

Kankri scowled and crossed his arms, his face a deep shade of red. "I never said I didn't enjoy myself, I just wanted to appropriately convey that-" Cronus intterupted Kankri's rambling with a quick kiss before pulling away completely, leaving Kankri in a state of startled silence.

"I... Should probably go." Kankri said, staring up and glancing hesitantly at the door to Cronus' respite block and then back towards Cronus. "To talk to Porrim about the get together."

Cronus nodded reluctantly. "Don't feel like you havwe to, though. I'd like you to stay, if you wvant." Cronus said softly, worrying that he'd somehow made Kankri uncomfortable. Thing were getting easier for them all the time, but Cronus still worried that sooner or later he'd end up going to far and driving Kankri away for good. Kankri always spoke his mind when something was bothering him, or at lease he always seemed to, but Cronus couldn't help worry that he was holding back, despite how uncharacteristic that was.

Kankri leaned down and kissed Cronus softly before turning and leaving his hive. Cronus heaved a sigh, collapsing back on his bed. He decided not to worry. Kankri would let him know if something was wrong. For now, Cronus decided it would be wise to put his energy towards getting ready for the double paledate. He was steadily growing more and more anxious about it. For one thing, he knew Porrim could totally kick his ass, and probably would if she had and doubt in her mind about how he was treating Kankri, but for another, he still had to confess his feelings to Rufioh. Cronus was beginning to feel he had his work cut out for him.

AN- Sorry this chapter was so short, not to mention sort of all over the place! I'm sort of setting the scene for a couple of major plot points to come :3 Please review! I'd love for you to let me know what you think of the fic! Thanks for everyone who's stuck with me thus far! I appreciate all of my readers.


	8. Scare

Cronus had awoken early; the sun was just setting as he pulled himself out of bed and got in the shower. Today was the day he had to go and talk to Rufioh. Cronus tried to tell himself he wasn't nervous, but he was. He got ready quickly, making sure he looked his best. Cronus headed out, but doubled back for his guitar. If anything, he could use it as an excuse. He had been giving Rufioh lessons after all. If he felt like chickening out, Cronus could just say he was working on a new piece that he wanted some feedback and Rufioh was the only one who would have the proper appreciation for it or something.

Cronus took the walk to Rufioh's hive slowly. He was starting to worry that maybe Rufoh wouldn't be alone. Cronus really, really hoped that Horuss wasn't there. As far as he was concerned, the sooner that creep was gone the better, both for him and for Rufioh.

Rufioh's hive was silent and dark when Cronus arrived. He chewed at the insider of his cheek anxiously, debating just heading home. It was still early, so Rufioh was probably still asleep. Cronus took a deep breath and knocked. No answer. Cronus waited another moment before knocking again. If Rufioh didn't answer he would just give up and go home. At least he'd tried.

"Hang on!" The muffled cry from inside the hive was unmistakably Rufioh's. After another moment Rufioh answered the door. He was dressed only in a pair of black boxers, and there was still a fair amount of slime clinging to his skin.

"Oh. Hey Cronus. Come on in." Rufioh said, waving Cronus inside with a sleepy grin.

"Shit cheif, I didn't mean to wvake you up." Cronus apologized, taking a seat in Rufioh's living block and setting his guitar on the floor beside him. "I can come back later you wvant."

"No worries. Just give me a couple of minutes to get cleaned up?" Rufioh asked. Cronus nodded and Rufioh left the room. In a couple of moments Cronus heard water running from one of the nearby rooms.

Cronus took the time to look around the living block of Rufioh's hive. It was small and comfortably furnished, if not a little cluttered. There were playing cards and dirty clothing strewn about the floor and a guitar propped in one corner. Rufioh had been serious about wanting to learn, which of course was why Cronus was here. That was the official reason anyways. That was good for Cronus. It would give him something to break the ice with. Cronus took a few deep breaths, telling himself that he could do this. That he had nothing to worry about. It was only Rufioh, after all. What was he so afraid of?

When Rufioh reappeared he was fully clothed, though he still looked a little sleepy and his mohawk was un-styled, flopping to one side. Rufioh sat on the couch next to Cronus, leaving a reasonable amount of space between them, looking at his hands.

"So, uh... What did you want to talk about?" Rufioh asked quietly. His shoulders were slumped, and he did seem pretty tired. Cronus suddenly felt bad. He shouldn't have come here and disturbed Rufioh like this.

"I just... wvell... I wvanted to see howv you wvere doing. It's been a vwhile sinnce wve last talked, and wvell..." This was already awkward, but then Cronus remembered that he did have an official reason for coming here. "Havwe you been playing much?" He asked abruptly, gesturing to the guitar in the corner.

"What? Oh. Oh yeah, a little. I mean, I'm still really bad at it, but I pick it up every one and a while and try to play. It's not going too well though, I guess I might give it up..." Rufioh said quietly. He seemed just about as nervous as Cronus felt. Or maybe he just really was out of it. He had just woken up, after all.

"Wvhat?" Cronus asked. "You're givwing up on me already?"

"No! I still want to learn, and the stuff you've showed me had been really great... it's just I'm not doing too well practicing on my own." Rufioh said. "I was really enjoying your lessons though." He added with a shy smile.

"Wvell then I guess it's my bad for neglecting my pupil." Cronus apologized. "I guess wve'll havwe to get back on track wvith your lessons. I havwe some pieces I'vwe been wvorking on that I wvanted some feedback on, so I brought my guitar." He said, growing increasingly glad that he had decided to bring it with him.

"Oh, cool!" Rufioh said, beaming. Cronus couldn't help smiling along with him; the winged troll's enthusiasm was contagious. "Why don't you play those for me first and then we can work on some stuff? I mean, I'm still learning to play, so I don't know how helpful my feedback would be, but..." He trailed off with a small shrug.

"Sounds good to me." Cronus agreed, pulling his guitar and notebook out of the case. "Here. Wve'vwe both got to tune anwvays, so you might as wvell do it now so I can showv you howv."

Rufioh nodded. They both tuned their instruments, and then Cronus played his songs for Rufioh. Rufioh's feedback was overwhelmingly positive, though Cronus suspected not it was entirely truthful. After the third song Cronus stopped, giving Rufioh a slightly exasperated look.

"Look, you can tell me the truth. If my songs suck, I wvant to knowv." He said. Rufioh bit his lip, looking a little uncomfortable.

"Well, uh... I think they were mostly a pretty good, but I think the last one you played maybe went on a little long?" Rufioh said timidly. "I mean, I liked the song a lot, but it seemed like the part close to the end where it sounds like it did it the beginning might have been a better place to stop."

"Wvhat, you mean here?" Cronus asked, showing Rufioh the page and pointing to the part he thought he was referring to.

"Maybe?" Rufioh said, scratching his head. "I don't actually know how to read music." He added, laughing a little. Cronus was beginning to notice that was a nervous habit of his.

"Wvell, wve can teach you that, too." Cronus said, just happy to have someone who would listen. Rufioh seemed like he really did want to learn, and better yet, like he actually enjoyed spending time with Cronus. Mere weeks ago he'd been completely alone, and now here he was with a wonderful matesprit and who knew, maybe even a potential moirail? Though Cronus didn't want to make assumptions or get ahead of himself. He still wasn't sure how he was supposed to go about saying anything to Rufioh. Did trolls even confess their pale feelings? It seemed to Cronus it was sort of something that just happened.

"Wow, okay, if you want to I guess that'd be cool." Rufioh agreed. "I feel like this is sort of a one-sided deal though. Like, don't really have anything to offer you in exchange..."

"Hey, don't wvorry about it." Cronus said, and he meant it. He was just happy to have the company, and especially happy to have Rufioh's company in particular. "This is nice. I'm havwing a good time too. It's nice to actually havwe someone to play with. And your feedback really has been helpful."

Rufioh grinned. Cronus really wanted to ask him about Horuss, but he was a little afraid to. He didn't want to spoil the mood. Still, knowing couldn't really make things any worse in the long run. "So uh... Did you evwer end up talking to Horuss?"

"Oh! Uh, no, not yet. It's just... It's so hard! I mean for one thing, he doesn't listen. I'll try to talk to him and he just goes on and on on these long tangents, and they always somehow end up coming back to how great our relationship has been for him, and at that point I just chicken out." Rufioh groaned. "I keep telling myself I'm just gonna grit my teeth and do it, but when the time comes I always end up backing out of it. I just feel so... I dunno, guilty."

"Sometimes I just wish I could leave, you know?" Rufioh continued in a slightly dreamy tone. "Go back into the forest. I mean Damara's still out there, and I don't want to deal with _that_... Plus I guess I'd get pretty lonely. But I could do it. I've done it before. And it's nice out there. So quiet and peaceful. You don't have to worry, it's just you and the forest, and you're so _free_. I get lonely sometimes, but I think that living on my own out there was probably the happiest I've ever been. Sometimes I think I'll go back. Just disappear. I've planned it all out, too. I know where I would go, how I would live."

Cronus stared at Rufioh, trying not to appear as alarmed as he felt. He forced a smile onto his face. After all, it wasn't like Rufioh was serious about running away. The guy was always daydreaming, and this was just another one of his little fantasies. And the thing was, in a way Cronus could sort of see where he was coming from. He'd considered running away many times, though that was before he had Rufioh or Kankri.

"I guess I used to. I don't really anymore though." Cronus answered truthfully. He told himself to calm down. "I havwe too much here that I'm attached to. I'vwe got Kankri now. And I havwe you." He said, gently nudging Rufioh in the side with his elbow, trying to get him to snap out of it. "Maybe it'd be nice to go awvay for a little wvhile, but not permanently."

"Yeah. I guess you're right. But it'd definitely be nice, at least for a while..." Rufioh continued in the same dreamy tone. After a moment he smile and shook his head. "But I guess there's too much keeping me here for it to be reasonable for me to leave forever. Anyways, were there more songs you wanted to play for me?" He asked, bringing them back to the matter at hand.

"Oh, I guess there are a couple. But wvhy don't I show you a fewv more chords first?" Cronus offered, hoping to distract Rufioh as well as himself. He told himself he wouldn't put too much stock into what Rufioh had said. There was no point in worrying about it. It just a silly little fantasy.

"Yeah, okay." Rufioh agreed. They kept playing, and Cronus managed to calm down somewhat. After another couple of songs they took a break, and Cronus remembered he was supposed to ask Rufioh about the "double paledate." He took a deep breath, wondering how to begin.

"So I guess Kankri wvants to hawve Porrim owver. He wvants all of us to hawve dinner or something." Cronus blurted out sort of awkwardly.

"Oh yeah? Are those two moirails or what?" Rufioh asked, sounding mildly disinterested.

"Basically. I mean, I they havwen't made it official or anything. But I'm a little wvorried about it. Porrim doesn't exactly... approwve of me. I think she's mostly givwing Kankri the benefit of the doubt." Cronus said. He glanced down at his hands, unsure as to how he should phrase his request. "So anywvays, I wvas wvondering if you'd like to come. I mentioned that wve'vwe been spending a lot of time together recently, and Kankri suggested I invwite you." Cronus said. That wasn't exactly accurate, but it was close enough to the truth. "Maybe you can keep Porrim from jumping dowvn my throat!" He added with a chuckle.

Rufioh grinned. "Oh sure! I mean, I'm not sure about the Porrim thing... She can get a little scary at times, haha." He laughed. Cronus was relived that he seemed okay with the idea. "But other than that it sounds good to me. Meulin and Horuss used to go on double flushed dates, and this has got to be better than that at least. I never had a moirail, so we've never done double pale dates, but- uh-" Rufioh added, a slight touch of bronze coloring his face.

That was basically a confession, and it was probably as close to one as Rufioh was ever going to get. Cronus beamed. Pretty much everything was going amazingly, and he'd finally managed to fill not one but two of his quadrants.

"Great." Cronus said before launching into the details of scheduling. Rufioh said he was free whenever- He pretty much jumped at any chance to have an excuse to stay away from Horuss,- and Cronus didn't have any commitments to anyone other than Rufioh and Kankri, so it was pretty much up to him and Porrim. Cronus felt relived that everything was going so well, and soon he was able to relax completely. He and Rufioh went back to playing, taking frequent breaks and chatting easily. Rufioh didn't bring up the possibility of leaving again, and soon Cronus forgot about it. He was, for now, thoroughly content.

* * *

-AN: Hey look! It's actual plot (sort of)! Wow! And there's gonna be more of it, too! Yaaay! Things are still a little slow, but I'm working up to the exciting stuff, I promise. Also I just love writing fluff, particularly pale fluff. I hope you like pale Crofioh, because there is A LOT more where that came from. I know there wasn't any Kronkri in this chapter and I don't care (though rest assured, there will be more.) Also, it was for good reason.

Please write a review to let me know what you think of the story so far!


	9. Moirails

It didn't take much work to set up the double pale date. Porrim, it had turned out, had been very enthusiastic about the idea and had even agreed to host it at her hive. This didn't help with Cronus' nerves, but at least he wouldn't have to worry about being the one to play host.

Rufioh had agreed to come over to Cronus' hive beforehand to help him get ready, and it turned out to be a good thing that he did. He came over early, just as the sun was beginning to set. Cronus was dressed and presentable, and at least physically if not mentally prepared. He'd rushed to get ready as soon as he'd woken up so as to distract himself from his own nerves. But because of this he'd been ready several hours before he had to leave, and was left with nothing to do but pace and worry.

Cronus jumped a little when Rufioh knocked. He answered the door promptly, telling himself that there was no need to be so tense.

"Hey Cronus." Rufioh said, flashing Cronus a timid smile. Cronus gave Rufioh a beaming grin in return and ushered him inside, taking a seat on the couch. Rufioh sat down in one of the armchairs across from him, looking even more anxious than usual.

"How's it going, cheif?" Cronus asked, giving Rufioh a long, searching look.

Rufioh didn't respond for a moment. He was staring at the patch of floor between his feet, lips pursed. Just as Cronus was beginning to worry again Rufioh raised his head and flashed the seadweller his old winning smile. "Good! Real good."

There was another moment of silence before Rufioh spoke again. "I tried to break up with Horuss again." Okay, so maybe there was more cause for concern than Cronus had thought there was. Still, he could handle relationship drama. Probably. He hadn't really had much of his own, but he could at least be there for Rufioh if he wanted to talk. And considering that Rufioh wasn't usually too hesitant about airing out the dirty laundry of his relationships with pretty much anyone who would listen, why wouldn't he talk to Cronus about it?

"Tried?" Cronus asked, trying to sound supportive rather than disappointed. Mostly he was just worried about Rufioh. He could see that his relationship with Horuss was weighing a lot on him, and he knew it would probably be a lot better from him to just end it. But judging from his romantic history, ending flushed relationships wasn't exactly Rufioh's strong suit.

"Well, I made a little progress at least. I was gonna just cut it off, but then I guess I backed out. But I still felt like I had to do something so I suggesting we sort of, uh, maybe take a break?" Rufioh said with a shrug. "I mean, I guess I didn't even really say that. I just told him I needed some space for a while. But he didn't react the way I expected him to. He wasn't angry at all. He didn't try to talk over me or change the subject- I mean, he did when I first tried to talk about our relationship, but once he heard that he sort of, I dunno... Gave up I guess?"

"Wvell, that's a start." Cronus said, trying to sound encouraging. "Maybe if you leavwe him alone for a wvhile he'll realize that you're not really interested in continuing your relationship on his owvn."

"I guess so. But isn't that just taking the easy way out? I mean, I don't see the point in making anything too hard on yourself, but I've never actually taken the trouble to end a relationship properly before." Rufioh whined desperately. "Plus, that almost seem worse. I mean, just straight up disappearing on him? How is that better than getting dumped?"

"Wvell, I wvasn't suggesting that you run out on him or anything!" Cronus replied, trying not to come off as defensive but not entirely succeeding. "Just tell him you need some of your owvn space for a wvhile."

"Yeah, I guess that could work." Rufioh agreed with a small sigh. "Hey, aren't I supposed to be the one giving you a pep talk?" He added with a slightly forced-sounding chuckle.

"Wvell I think your need is greater than mine at the moment. Besides, wvhy can't it just go both wvays?" Cronus added, though Rufioh's words had reminded him how nervous he was. "Mostly I just wvanted you here in case Porrim decides to rip me to to shreds. I'm not too concerned about making a good impression, I mean, she's already pretty much seen me at my wvorst."

"Haha, okay. Well... I guess that is pretty good advice. So I guess I'll just try that?" Rufioh said with a shrug. "Anyways, we should probably get going, if we don't wanna be late. You ready?"

Cronus swallowed. The answer to Rufioh's question was no, he was not ready, and he would probably never be. But he knew he had to suck it up and do it anyways, so he took a couple of deep breaths and flashed Rufioh a shaky smile.

"Yeah. Lets go."

The walk to Porrim's hive was quiet and uneventful. Cronus walked up to her doorstep with Rufioh in tow, hoping that Kankri was already there. Rufioh kept quiet, and not having anyone to talk to was not helping with his nerves. Cronus was really starting to worry, but for now they had to focus on the task at hand. After the date they could go back to his hive, curl up on the bed and have a nice long feelings jam.

Cronus hesitated on Porrim's doorstep. He took a couple of deep breaths and smoothed his fingers over his hair, trying his best to calm down. He was starting to feel a little silly. He could flirt with pretty much anyone regardless of their level of interest, but when it came to a casual interaction with his matesprit's best friend he was sweating bullets. After another moment he knocked.

Porrim answered the door. She was dressed in her usual style of attire- tight and low cut- and Cronus had to remind himself not to let his gaze wander. He caught her eye and she gave him a brittle smile which he returned somewhat hesitantly.

"Come on in. Kanny's already here." Porrim said, waving them in briskly without any further form of greeting. The cold reception wasn't a good sign, but Cronus had known that winning Porrim's approval was going to be an uphill battle. She led them into a tasteful but sparsely decorated room with two curved couches facing one another around a circular table. Kankri was already seated on one of the couches, and he flashed Cronus a timidly excited smile as Porrim led him and Rufioh into the room.

Porrim claimed the seat next to Kankri, kicking off her shoes and tucking her feet up under her, forcing Cronus and Rufioh to take the couch across from them. Cronus met Kankri's gaze and smiled, trying to avoid looking at Porrim altogether.

"Welcome to my hive. I made a pot of tea if either of you would like some, it's just there." Porrim said, gesturing to a small table to the side of the couch she and Kankri were on. Cronus declined, but Rufioh got up to fix himself a cup with a quiet 'thank you,' in Porrim's direction.

"So, of course Kankri told me everything when the two of you got together, but how long have you and Rufioh been moirails? I'm a little surprised that I didn't hear about this sooner." Cronus smiled, relived that the topic of conversation wasn't currently him and Kankri. He wasn't surprised that Porrim had brought this up considering her love of gossip.

"Er-" Cronus wasn't one hunded percent sure how to answer that question.

"I guess it been what- a couple weeks? We only, uh, made it official recently though." Rufioh answered for him, glancing anxiously back and forth between Cronus and Porrim.

"Well, I suppose it's a little late then, but nonetheless, congratulations to you both." Porrim said with a warm smile, though it appeared to be mostly directed at Rufioh.

"Uh, yeah..." Rufioh added.

There was an awkward moment of silence before Porrim's attention veered away from Rufioh.

"Cronus." She said, looking him directly in the eyes as she addressed him. Cronus couldn't read her face at all. "Would you mind helping me a moment? I've made some biscuits to go with the tea, and I was wondering if you'd help me bring them in."

"Um, of course," Cronus said, getting up and following her into the consumption block.

"Since wvhen do you bake?" He asked, unfortunately sounding a little more incredulous than merely surprised.

"It's not a hobby of mine or anything. I just figured I'd make a little something seeing I was going to have company." Porrim said defensively, opening the oven and pulling out a tray of biscuits. They looked a little scorched, but Cronus wasn't about to say anything.

"You can stop tiptoeing around me, Cronus. I won't bite you." Porrim said abruptly, before tuning away from him and pulling out a plate, carefully arranging the biscuits on it.

"I wvasn't-" Cronus stopped, knowing that if he denied it Porrim was sure to call his bluff. He sighed, unsure what he should say next.

"Look Cronus. The fact is, I don't really like you. And I sure as hell don't trust you." Porrim began. Cronus was about to interject, but Porrim cut him off with a venomous glare. "But I do trust Kankri. Maybe we don't always see eye to eye on everything, but I know he has his head on straight, and his pusher is in the right place. So if you're okay by Kankri, you're okay by me."

Cronus breathed a sigh of relief, but evidently Porrim wasn't finished. "What I'm trying to say is merely that I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. I know that Kankri can be rather... tenacious, so for the most part I'm not worried, but I still feel it's my duty to look out for him to some extent. So I'd better not find out that your intentions towards him are less that one hundred percent pure and honest."

Cronus laughed awkwardly. He knew he would never do anything to intentionally hurt Kankri, but this certainly wasn't helping him be any less nervous around Porrim.

"Of course. I care about Kan just as much as you do, you knowv." He countered.

"Yes, well. I trust Kankri to be able to take care of himself and make good decisions." Porrim said, gabbing the plate of buiscuts and heading out of the consumption block. Cronus followed her, quickly resuming his seat next to Kankri and mulling over what Porrim had said. A lot of it seemed a little contrary. If Porrim trusted Kankri's judgement, than why didn't she trust him? Still, it probably wouldn't be an issue so long as he didn't screw up. And Cronus certainly wasn't intending to do any wrong by Kankri.

The rest of the evening went off without a hitch. Things were still a bit uncomfortable between Cronus and Porrim, but Cronus did let it get to him too badly. He wasn't too concerned with what she thought of his so long as she didn't want to kick his ass. Rufioh ended up heading out early, and he and Kankri left shortly afterwards. As they were heading back in the direction of Cronus' hive the seadweller started to worry again. He really should go make sure everything was okay with him. It sounded like Rufioh was in need of a proper feelings jam.

But he didn't want to ditch Kankri. As they walked along Kankri ducked under his arm. This was the closest Kankri had ever allowed them to get in public, and Cronus was happy that he seemed okay with that. Things were working out better than he ever could have dreamed. And maybe Rufioh was in sort of a bad place right now, but that was what moirails were for right? Cronus made up his mind that tomorrow he'd go see Rufioh and sort everything out. For now though, he was perfectly happy to bask in his matesprit's presence.

* * *

AN: Sorry for the lack of updates; this chapter took me forever to write. Mostly because I have no fucking clue how to write Porrim. Ugh. Also sorry the title kind of sucks, I couldn't think of anything better :I.

Anyways, I hope you like the story so far! I'd really appreciate it if you'd write a review to know what you think :3. (Also- shame on Cronus for not being such a great moirail at the end of the chapter, haha)


	10. Together

Cronus lay on his back, looking up at the dark sky. He shuddered slightly as a cool breeze blew over him and pulled Kankri closer, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

He and Kankri were laying on a blanket on the small stretch of lawn ring behind Cronus' hive. It was still early, so almost no one was out, and Cronus had suggested that they go out somewhere, but Kankri had insisted they stay at one of their hives. However, when he had suggested this as a compromise Kankri had been perfectly agreeable. Cronus was still a little disappointed that Kankri insisted they keep their relationship a secret so adamantly, but he didn't want to push the issue too hard. Just spending time together was enough for him, so long as he didn't think about it too much.

"Wve should do this more often." Cronus said. He and Kankri spent a lot of time together, but when Kankri was around he didn't really have anyone else except Rufioh, who had made himself scarce as of late. Cronus had stopped by his hive a couple of times, and he'd seemed fine, but he hadn't been out and about. He was probably avoiding Horuss. Cronus knew it probably was pretty irresponsible of him to let Rufioh continue his relationship with Horuss when he was clearly so unhappy with it, but he didn't know what to do about it. He knew he should probably just say something to Rufioh about his absences, but sometimes Cronus worried he was being too clingy, both as a matesprit and a moirail. Rufioh and Kankri were all he had.

"I agree, but of course it wouldn't do for either of us to neglect our other relationships in favor of our matespirtship." Kankri said, propping himself up on one elbow to he could look Cronus in the eyes as he spoke to him.

"I guess not." In Cronus' case it was really just the one other relationship, and he suspected that was the case at least to some extent with Kankri, but he wasn't about to say anything.

"That's not to say I don't think we could stand to spend more time together though." Kankri said, sounding a little hasty. Cronus sighed, feeling a little guilty for having said anything. He wished he wasn't so needy. "Anyways, let's go inside. I'm getting a little cold."

"Yeah, okay." Cronus agreed, getting up and waiting for Kankri to collect the blanket they had been lying on before following him back into his hive.

Cronus took the blanket from Kankri and tossed it, along with his jacket, on the floor, earning a mildly disapproving look from Kankri, before ushering him into his respite block.

"Your hive is a mess. Would it kill you to clean up after yourself once and a while?" Kankri asked as he took a seat on the bed, though he didn't really sound like he was actually all that bothered by it.

"Awv, I can't be bothered wvith all that! I don't get wvhat the big deal is. So maybe I leavwe some stuff lying around sometimes, it's not like you can't get to the door or anything." Cronus said with a shrug.

"I prefer to keep things tidy, but to each their own, I suppose" Kankri said.

Cronus went over to Kankri, sitting on the bed beside him and wrapping his arms around his matesprit. Kankri gave a soft sigh before twisting around and kissing him.

Cronus tended to get carried away quickly when it came to the physical aspect of his relationship with Kankri, despite his best effort not to. He returned Kankri's kisses, careful to go slow, tough he did bring one hand to the small on his matesprit's back to pull him closer and twine the other in his hair.

Kankri pulled away to lie back on the bed, and Cronus followed suit, rolling over so he was on top of Kankri, being careful not to put any of his weight on him. He was a little surprised when Kankri was the one who pulled him closer, kissing him sloppily and desperately. They'd been going a little further every time they were together like this, but Kankri was never the one to initiate. Cronus decided that this was probably a good thing, surprising as it was. There were times when he worried that he was taking things too far, so this was a good sign. That, and _damn _it was nice.

"You done lecturing me then?" Cronus asked, chuckling slightly.

"Don't count your cluckbeasts, Cronus." Kankri replied with a small snort, kissing his neck along his gills before nipping them gently.

Cronus didn't usually embarrassed, but his face did color a little at the high-pitched squeaking sort of moan that escaped his lips. He was trying to keep his cool, but his bulge was already coming unsheathed.

"Sh-" Cronus gasped, biting off the swear that reflexively formed on his lips.

Kankri pulled back, but it wasn't with the flustered look he usually gave Cronus when he had taken things too far. In fact, he was biting his lower lip, and there was a decidedly amused look in his eyes.

"Wvhat?" Cronus asked, tilting his head and smiling along with Kankri.

"Nothing." Kankri said, leaning in and burying in face in the crook of Cronus' neck.

Kankri lay there for a couple of moments, and Cronus rolled over, propping himself up on one elbow, just watching. The red flushed tint to his cheeks was a little softer than it usually was after they got close like this, and there was an oddly confident, fiery look on Kankri's face. One thing Cronus had always known about Kankri was that once he was sure of something he was not easily swayed, and the conviction with which his matesprit was looking at him now was starting to make him a little nervous.

Cronus half expected Kankri to say something more, but as his matesprit reached for him with a look in his eyes that Cronus still wasn't used to seeing, it became evident once more that conversation wasn't at the forefront of Kankri's mind.

Kankri's kisses were hasty and sloppy as usual, but he was getting a lot better at this. He and Cronus both were, only Cronus wished he weren't so needy when it seemed Kankri was perfectly content to take things at the slow pace they had been.

Cronus buried his hand in Kankri's soft, messy hair as his matesprit wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling the seadweller closer. Soon Cronus allowed his fingers to ghost up to the hem of Kankri's sweater. Kankri disentangled himself from Cronus slightly, ignoring his slight, unintentional whine of protest, and removed the sweater, immediately followed by his long-sleeved black shirt. Taking advantage of the inches of space between them, Cronus also quickly removed his own shirt.

As he drew his attention back to Kankri, it was all he could do not to flat-out gasp. As if was, he still spent enough time staring that Kankri's face flushed a deep red Kankri's body was small and slender, and he didn't have a lot of muscle definition, but there was a lithe grace to his build beneath the long-sleeved shirt and thick sweater her always wore.

"Cronus?" Kankri asked, tilting his head to one side slightly and sounding uncharacteristically anxious.

_"Wvh_at? Aren't I allowved to admire my matesprit's physical endowvments?" He replied, raising an eyebrow and flashing Kankri a slightly lascivious grin.

"Of course, I have no issue with that, in fact- well, I suppose in a way it is rather flattering- but remember that I'm not accustomed to this sort of thing..." He said, blushing heavily, though there was a hint of a satisfied smile at the corners of his lips.

Cronus didn't feel the need to say anything further, he, just pulled Kankri close again, taking advantage of the newly-exposed area's of his matesprit' skin by gently kissing and sicking along his neck and collarbone, eliciting soft little gasps and sighs of pleasure from Kankri.

"I guess it's a good thing I have that sweater Porrim gives me, considering you insist on marking me up like... some kind of... uh, Cronus?" Kankri had begun speaking in a slightly annoyed tone, though it was really leaning more towards affectionate, but when Cronus pulled back, Kankri looked up at him with a confused, almost wounded look.

"If you don't like it I'll stop. You should havwe said something before." Cronus murmured, trying to sound less annoyed that he was.

"I never said it was a problem. Aren't I allowed to make a joke?" Kankri was smiling, but his tone was creeping into the territory of embarrassed and slightly irked.

"Wvell of course. I guess I just wvasn't awvare that you wvere capable of humor." Cronus teased in return, giving Kankri a gentle nudge in the ribs.

"Rude. I have an excellent sense of humor." Kankri said, turning his face away from Cronus, before giving him a small giggle and an indulgent smile. "What am I going to do with you, Cronus?"

Cronus frowned, pretending to consider the question very seriously.

"Wvell... I guess, if it's not too much _trouble _for you, you _could_ kiss me until I can't think straight. Only if you wvanted too, of course." Cronus purred, grinning at Kankri flirtatiously.

"Considering how little sense you talk, that shouldn't take too long." Kankri muttered, but after a moment he did pull himself in closer to Cronus, placing kisses along his neck and jawline, causing the sea dweller to loose his train of thought, allowing himself to be entirely lost in sensation.

Cronus cupped Kankri's chin in one hand, guiding his matesprit's mouth back up to his own while his other hand ran down his torso to the waistband of his high-waisted pants. He fumbled a bit with the button but ultimately got it through the loop, and tugged the zipper all the way down in one smooth motion.

This was the farthest Cronus had ever taken things, and he flashed Kankri a questioning look, pulling his hand away slightly.

"All right, chief?" Cronus asked softly. Kankri nodded, the same intense expressing he had been wearing earlier falling across his face.

"I want this, Cronus. You don't have to worry. If you do something I am uncomfortable with, I will let you know." Kankri reassured him, looking away and blushing heavily.

Cronus' already accelerated pulse was racing. He tugged Kankri's pants down slightly so they were out of the way, followed by his briefs. He tried not to stare at the candy red bulge or drippng red nook, but didn't entirely succeed. Ignoring his own throbbing nook and bulge he began to trail kisses down Kankri's bare chest. He passed over Kankri's bulge, nudging it out of the way gently with one hand while guiding Kankri's legs open further with the other. He glanced back of at Kankri, who was gazing down at his with a slightly anxious look as usual, but also with such trust and affection that it made Cronus' blood pusher ache.

He placed a gentle, soft kiss on the outside of Kankri's nook, granting him a slightly frustrated whine from his matesprit, before running his tongue along the length of his folds, slowly circling in towards the entrance of his nook.

"Ah, Cronus-" Kankri whimpered, arching his back and burying one hand in Cronus' hair.

Cronus continued to run his tongue along the outside of Kankri's nook, loosing himself in the warmth and softness, for another moment, before drawing himself back up and placing a deep, slow kiss on Kankri's lips. He brought his hand down between Kankri's legs, running his index finger along the entrance of his nook before slowly sliding a single digit in, keeping his eyes locked on Kankri's the whole time.

Kankri was breathing in soft, slightly uneven pants, his eyes half lidded, his face tinged with red. Cronus didn't know that he'd ever felt desire as acutely as he did now. His bulge squirmed in his jeans, and after a moment he removed his hand to undo his fly and hastily yank them off, tossing them aside, bringing his face back up to Kankri's.

Cronus brought his hand back between Kankri's legs, Kankri intercepted him, pulling his hand away and scooting down the bed a little and palming Cronus' bulge before gently pushing his boxers aside and running his hand down the length of it, causing Cronus to let out a low, soft moan.

Kankri wrapped his hand a little more tightly around Cronus' bulge, slowly pumping it back and forth.

Cronus let out a slow breath through his teeth than was almost a hiss. "F-fu-Kan-" He cut himself off, knowing that Kankri didn't approve of his swearing. Kankri responded by increasing the speed and pressure of his hand on Cronus' bulge, earning him another series of gasps and moans until Cronus felt a heat building below his stomach and new he was about to go over the edge. With another sharp cry he felt himself release, the warm wetness of his genetic material all over his sheets- and Kankri.

"Awv, shit, sorry-!" Cronus apologized to his slightly miffed-looking matesprit.

"It's... fine." Kankri said delicately, his expression softening as he wiped himself off on one of the sheets and tossed it aside.

"Wvell in that case... wvhere wvere wve?" Cronus said, trailing a hand back down between Kankri's legs and running a finger over the entrance to his nook.

Before Cronus could do anything more though, Kankri let out a sharp huff and scooted away, rolling over onto his side so that his back was to Cronus. "I think I need to... Uh, I think we should stop. Actually, would you mind to terribly if I used your ablution trap?" He asked, wrapping his arms around his bare chest. Cronus shrugged, and Kankri collected his clothes and quickly left the room.

Cronus wasn't sure what to make of what had just happened, and he had no idea what could be going through Kankri's head right now. For Cronus, the evening had just been one curve-ball after another. He was too overwhelmed to process much of anything.

Eventually Cronus pulled his boxers back on and crawled under the covers, pulling them all the way up over his head. The ablution block was next to his room, and he could faintly hear the hiss of water running, and then silence. The hope that Kankri would come back that Cronus had been clinging to diminished eventually, as he slowly began to drift of to sleep, still not entirely sure what had happened between him and Kankri, and, past a certain point, if it had even been real.

When Cronus awoke it was early evening. He had assumed that Kankri would had left, but there he was, snuggled up next to him, wearing a pair of Cronus' boxers with along with his bright read sweater. Cronus breathed a sigh of relief; maybe he hadn't screwed up after all. But looking down at his matesprit, he realized it wasn't as simple as all that. He wasn't sure what he wanted from Kankri at this point, much less what Kankri wanted from _him. _

* * *

AN: Again, sorry for this chapter taking so long! I spent a long time agonizing over what order to put certain things, and as a result I ended up re-writing the whole chapter about half a dozen times.

Also, I know I'm not too great at smut, but I wanted a little more practice before I got into the more serious stuff... But also this scene is important for plot-reasons. It's got to do with another one of those big plot-points that I keep insisting I'm building up to without actually giving any real proof that this is really going anywhere. But it is going somewhere,_ I promise._

But yeah, as usual, thanks for reading, and I'd love any feedback you have if you'd like to write review!


	11. Missing

Cronus had spent a couple of night by himself. Usually he got a little restless being cooped up inside all the time, but he was actually okay with it this time. He was concentrating on his music; something he had been neglecting as of late. He could walk around in his underwear and watch the same four movies over and over and sleep whenever he wanted. There was a time when Cronus was used to being alone like this, and how much he had wanted company. He never imagined that a time would come when things were the other way around, but here he was. Before his solitude had been largely to do with the fact that no one wanted much to do with him. It was different when it was self-imposed.

Tonight though, Cronus was going to see Rufioh. He wasn't sure why, but he felt almost like he had been putting it off. Things were going great between the two of them on the surface but Rufioh had been distant and spacey as of late. Something had been bothering him, and Cronus had neglected to ask him about it, just had he had neglected to talk to Rufioh about his own issues. Neither of them was really doing their job as moirails, but Cronus felt that it was mainly his fault.

Still, as much as Cronus wanted to see his moirail, he took the now-familiar walk from his hive to Rufioh's slowly. He felt anxious for some reason he couldn't name. Cronus told himself that he was being silly. He was sure seeing Rufioh would help. They could talk through everything that was going on with both of them, and then things would go back to normal. Though between the weirdness with Rufioh and whatever was going on with Kankri, Cronus was certain what normal was for him anymore.

Cronus arrived and Rufioh's hive. He gave a light knock, but the hive remained silent. Cronus noticed that although it was well into the night and most trolls were up and about, the windows of Rufioh's hive were dark. Maybe he was out? Yes, that had to be it. Cronus lingered on Rufioh's doorstep for another moment before turning to head back to his own hive.

Cronus was almost back to his own hive when he saw Horuss coming towards him. He took a deep breath. Cronus wasn't exactly a big fan of Horuss', and he suspected the feeling was mutual. At any rate, it had been a while since they had come face to face.

"Excuse me Cronus," Horuss began politely. Cronus began to panic. Horuss _never _talked to him. And there was something a little off in his tone, not to mention that creepy smile he always wore.

"You need something, cheif?" Cronus returned cautiously. A hint of worry flickered across Horuss' features before returning to the same unnerving grin he always wore.

"I was wondering if you had seen Rufioh recently? Seeing as you're his moirail and all, I figured you must be in touch with him." Horuss' tone made it clear that he hadn't meant the question as any sort of accusation, but it still hit Cronus like a punch in the gut. He should be in touch with Rufioh. But the fact of the matter was that his moirail had disappeared and told him nothing.

"Of course I'vwe been in touch wvith him. He's just been feeling a little out of sorts. Been keeping inside." Cronus told Horuss. It occurred to him that he wasn't quite sure weather he was defending Rufioh or himself with the lie. He tried not the let that revelation bother him. "Anywvays, I'vwe got to go." Cronus said, turning and practically running away from Horuss. He headed back to his own hive, trying not to worry. Rufioh was probably just out, and the fact that he was avoiding Horuss didn't mean anything.

Cronus repeated those two statements over and over in his head like some sort of desperate mantra, but then he remembered something Rufioh had said a while back about wanting to leave, to go back into the forest. But he wouldn't do that just to escape whatever was going on with him and Horuss, would he? But as soon as Cronus asked himself that, he knew the answer was yes, Rufioh probably would.

"Excuse me, I really havwe to go." Cronus said, turning away abruptly.

"When you next see him, please tell him that I would like to speak with him." Horuss called as Cronus walked away. He had no intention of talking to Rufioh about anything related to Horuss, or at least not on his behalf. When Cronus found Rufioh and got to the bottom of whatever it was that was going on with him- he refused to say if- he would get to the bottom of what was going on with Rufioh and Horuss. He knew he probably should have worked harder to help Rufioh resolve that situation sooner. But first he was going to get to the bottom of whatever was going on, weather it had to do with Horuss or not, and that meant locating his moirail.

_Dammit Rufioh, where are you?_ Cronus thought desperately. But then he told himself to calm down. Rufioh was probably just avoiding Horuss. He'd probably finally gotten tired of hanging around. And surely, Rufioh would want someone to talk to about how fed up he was. How this time he was leaving for real. Maybe, just maybe, Rufioh was at his hive right now, looking for him. If Cronus headed home now he'd bump into Rufioh having given up and headed home, and they'd laugh about how they'd nearly missed each other. Cronus replayed this scenario in his head until he reached his own hive. Sighing, he went inside, unsure as to what to do now.

_'Get a grip!' _Cronus told himself. He knew he was blowing things out of proportion. Rufioh had probably just wandered off somewhere. Maybe he's gone to see Meenah or something? He knew that Rufioh felt a little more comfortable around here than most of the other trolls. He was probably just with someone else. Rufioh was pretty popular among the other trolls, and it wasn't like Cronus didn't expect him to have a life outside of their moirailegence. He decided he might as well just go back to his own hive and wait. Rufioh would probably turn up himself sooner or later.

Cronus ended up going back to his hive. He's spent the last couple of days alone, and he told himself he would just keep doing what he had been. Playing guitar and watching the same four movies over and over. It was the same routine he'd had before he'd filled his flushed quadrants. It pained him to go back to it now, but at least it was a distraction from his worries.

After a couple of hours of plucking away at his guitar and "brooding" as Cronus liked to call it -though in truth it was really wallowing in self-pity- Cronus decided that he needed to get out of his hive, weather or not Rufioh was available. Perhaps his worries about Rufioh were more pressing, but he had left things with Kankri in sort of an odd spot, and he wasn't certain where he and his matesprit stood at the moment.

Cronus quickly made his was to Kankri's hive, keeping his eyes peeled on the off chance that he ran into Rufioh on the way. Unfortunately, Cronus had no such luck. After a few desperate moments, Cronus knocked, secretly hoping that his matesprit wasn't home.

Kankri answered the door, looking tired and a little grouchy. "Cronus. Come in." He said, the corners of his mouth flicking into a slight smile before falling back into a slight scowl.

"So what did you want?" Kankri asked, leading Cronus into the living block of his hive.

"Wvhat, I havwe to havwe and excuse to see my matesprit now?" Cronus asked, taking a seat on the lovesat and grabbing Kankri's hand, attempting to pull him in. Kankri pulled his hand out of Cronus', but took a seat beside him.

"No, but a bit of warning would have been nice." Kankri retorted sharply, fixing a scowl on Cronus. Kankri wasn't the most chipper troll out there, but it had been a while since Cronus had seen him this grouchy.

"I can leavwe if you're busy. I just wvanted to see you." Cronus said, fully aware of the fact that he was whining and not really caring.

"No, it's fine that you're here. It's not as if I was doing anything." Kankri sighed.

"Wvhat's wvrong, Kan?" Cronus asked, drawing closer to his matesprit and wrapping his arms around him, placing a gentle kiss behind one ear as his neck was largely obscured by the high collar of his sweater.

"Nothing. I'm fine." Kankri said, though his moody tone and expression suggested otherwise. He pulled his legs up off the floor, hurrying them to his chest and wrapping an arm around them, resting his head on his knees. After a moment he closed his eyes as well. "How have you been, Cronus?"

"I'wve been... wvorried." Cronus said truthfully. Kankri's eyes snapped open at this and he lifted his head, gazing at Cronus with a serious and slightly troubled expression.

"N-not about anything you'vwe done!" Cronus cried hastily. Kankri didn't appear at a placated by his assurance. "Just some stuff wvith Rufoih and all. I mean, not wvith _me_ and Rufioh, but..." For some reason he felt like he shouldn't tell anyone about Rufioh's absence just yet. He'd probably just get written off as an overprotective, clingy moirail. But he really was starting to worry. "I'm sure it wvill be okay though." Cronus lied.

"Well, as a moirail it is sort of your job to worry about and many trolls in recently established pale relationship tend to be a little overprotective. It's perfectly normal for you to be concerned, even if your worries have little substance." Kankri said. Cronus felt a little silly, because his worries didn't really have a leg to stand on. He shrugged, nodding along with what Kankri had said. It didn't really make him feel any better, but he didn't really want to talk about it anymore. Not with Kankri, anyhow.

"Wvell, wvhat about you?" Cronus asked, wrapping an arm around Kankri, who shuddered a little at the physical contact, but didn't push him away. Cronus frowned a little; it had been a while since Kankri had had any sort of negative reaction to his physical closeness, especially when it was casual stuff like this.

"What about me?" Kankri asked in a faraway voice, fidgeting distractedly with the hem of his sweater.

"Howv havwe you been lately?" Cronus clarified. "I mean, I hawven't seen you in almost a wveek. Did you end up finding someone else to pester?" He asked with a theatrical pout.

"I don't 'pester' anyone and you know it. Maybe you a little, but that's to be expected from one of your quadrantmates at least to some extent." Kaknkri countered defensively. "But I've been fine. Porrim is upset with me, but that's not really anything new."

"Wvhat's evwen going on there?" Cronus asked. "Wvith you and Porrim I mean." He added.

"It doesn't really matter. She's just being oversensitive." Kankri grumbled. Cronus suspected that he was twisting the truth, but considering the mood Kankri was in he didn't think it wise to say anything.

"Oh. Wvell I'm sorry you're hwving trouble wvith her. I'm... sure she'll come around evwentually." Cronus muttered, unsure of what else to say. He pressed a kiss to his cheek, and Kankri turned to look at him with a sigh, stifling a soft yawn as he did so.

"Listen Cronus, I would love to stay up and talk to you, but it's been a rather long night for me..." Kankri said.

"Of course. I'll let you get your rest." Cronus said. He waited a moment, half expecting Kankri to say something else, but he just nodded and left the room. Cronus waited a moment, but it when Kankri didn't return he got up and left the hive. If nothing else, Rufioh was probably back by now. And Cronus sure could use a feelings jam right about now.

Cronus made a beeline for Rufioh's hive, but when he arrived it was dark and empty. He gave the door a sturdy knock, but there was no sound. He knocked again, harder and more insistently. The panic that had threatened to materialize when he had come by earlier now took full effect.

After throwing a furtive glace around to make sure no one was nearby, Cronus tried the handle. The door was unlocked, and Cronus slipped inside.

"Rufioh?" Cronus called out called out. The living block was dark, and when he flicked on the light Cronus saw that the room was oddly tidy. The guitar that Rufioh usually kept in the corner was missing as well.

"Rufioh? You here?" Crouns called again, knowing that he wasn't going to get an answer. _He's probably just at Horuss'. _He told himself. _They ran into each other and he gave in, like the big pushover he is. And he'll be back over to my hive whining to me about it tomorrow. _Cronus told himself, but he didn't really believe it himself. He sat on the floor of Rufioh's hive, not wanting to leave though he knew he should, as if simply being in Rufioh's hive long enough would fix whatever had gone wrong here, telling himself that if he waited long enough everything would go back to normal.


	12. Escapism

Cronus stared up at the ceiling of his ablution block, focusing on the wavy shapes of the ceiling tiles that had been distorted by the water. He's filled the tub with water so hot it was nearly scalding and submerged himself, breathing through is gills rather than coming up for air. It felt a little odd, breathing underwater after having spent most of his life on land. Sea dwellers were supposed to prefer it this way, but it felt odd to Cronus after having spent so much time on land. The temperature of the water probably didn't help either, but Cronus found it comforting. He was getting used to the heat.

He stayed there until the water got cold, trying not to think. Cronus had spent a lot of his life alone, so he should be able to do so now, but he felt like he was going crazy without anyone to talk to. That, and the loneliness was so much worse now that he knew what he was missing.

Cronus let the water out of the tub, drying himself off and dressing quickly, not bothering with his hair for once. He went back to his respite block and sat on the bed, not really wanting to do anything. There was nothing to do, anyways.

As hard as he tried not to, Cronus couldn't hep but wonder where he had gone wrong regarding Rufioh. Moirails were supposed to keep their plaemates sane, so they wouldn't do things like run off into the forest where their crazy ex matesprit was lurking without so much as a word to anyone. Okay, so Cronus didn't _know_ that that was what Rufioh had done, but he suspected that was the case. Though he didn't understand why Rufioh wouldn't have just made a section of his memories private and retreated there. Cronus supposed he _could _have, but he'd been to almost all of Rufioh's regular haunts, and there was nothing there. There was only one place left to look.

A steady, insistent pounding on his door interrupted Cronus' train of thought. Cronus sighed, but he got up. He told himself to ignore whoever was knocking, but a glimmer of hope that it was Rufioh compelled him to answer. He sighed internally when he saw the small, nubby-horned figure of his matesprit.

"Oh, hey Kan." Cronus said, waving Kankri inside and trying not to feel disappointed. He shouldn't feel disappointed to see his matesprit. It used to be that he couldn't wait to see Kankri. That every time they parted he would count down the hours until the saw each other again. So why did it seem such like a chore to him now? Cronus knew he still cared deeply for Kankri. He couldn't figure out what was wrong. He told himself he was just distracted because he was so worried about Rufioh.

"Cronus, are you alright?" Kankri asked. Well, at least he got right to the point. That was one thing that Cronus liked about Kankri. Sometimes he was a little too blunt to be considered polite, but at least he didn't dance around an issue if something was bothering him. He always spoke his mind. Now though, Cronus found himself wishing that his matesprit had at least bothered to make some polite small talk or something first.

"I'm fine. I'm just- I'vwe just got something on my mind." Cronus said desperately, wishing that Kankri would leave.

"Oh. Well... I just wanted to see you. I realize that I was a little terse with you the other night and I wanted to apologize. Other things were weighing on me, but I realize that it was completely inappropriate for me to allow that to affect the manner in which I spoke to or treated you." Kankri said, though there was still a hint of annoyance in his tone, and something else Cronus couldn't quite place.

"Oh. Wvell no harm done. I didn't evwen notice. You seemed fine to me." Cronus said, realizing once the words had left his mouth how easily they could be misconstrued. Kankri frowned, but didn't say anything.

"I see. Well in that case, I'll consider the matter forgotten." Kankri said with a slightly relived smile. The two trolls had been standing in Cronus' living block and Kankri took a seat now, looking up at Cronus expectantly. Cronus frowned, but took a seat next to Kankri.

"Listen Kan..." Cronus said, not really sure where he was going with this. He felt a little queasy. Just a few minutes ago he had been wishing for company, but now that Kankri was here, he found that all he wanted to to be alone. Well, maybe not alone, but seeing as his moirail, the troll he really wanted to talk to, was AWOL, solitude was the best alternative. "Wvould you mind... givwing me some spa- a little time to myself? I wvant to see you but... I just need a little time." Cronus said, feeling a little hollow as the words left his mouth.

Kankri's brows came together for a moment, but the he relaxed and stood, looking a little uncomfortable but largely unconcerned.

"Of course. Take all the time you need. But... Come find me when you're ready?" Kankri asked a little sadly. Cronus nodded and smiled, unable to say anything else. Kankri leaned in and gave him a soft kiss before exiting the hive.

When Kankri was gone Cronus sighed, sinking back into the couch. He didn't know what to make of that interaction. A part of Cronus wanted to go after Kankri and apologize for the way that he had acted, but he didn't have the energy to do that. He'd already been stressed, and for whatever reason the encounter with Kankri had left him emotionally drained. He wished Rufioh were here more than ever, or if that wasn't going to happen, that he could somehow disappear as well.

After a moment, Cronus pulled himself up, rushing out the door, heading in the direction on Kankri's hive. It wasn't long before he caught up with Kankri. Cronus called out to him, feeling his blood-pusher pounding in his throat all the while.

"That was fast." Kankri said with a hint of a smile, but his eyes were angry. Cronus felt sick about what he was about to do. But he had to make Rufioh his priority now. And pretending that nothing was wrong wasn't going to fix things with Kankri.

"Kan, there wvas something else I wvanted to talk to you about." Cronus said slowly.

"Alright. Should we go back to your hive?" Kankri said, sounding oddly resigned and impatient. Like Cronus was some whiny wriggler that he was humoring to get him to stop throwing a tantrum.

"Ah... Sure, I guess wve can." Cronus said, wondering why Kankri didn't invite him over. They were a lot closer to Kankri's hive. Trying to to dwell on it, Cronus took Kankri's hand and turned around. For once, Kankri didn't pull away, even though they were in public.

Cronus lead the way in silence, ushering Kankri inside without a word once they'd arrived. Kanrki turned to give him a bewildered glance once they had entered his hive.

"So what was it that you wanted to speak with me about? I hope nothing's wrong..." Kankri said, arms crossed and chin up. Even in his evident confusion there was something haughty in his pose. How odd that Cronus had never noticed that before.

"No, wvas just... thinking of going avway for a vwhile." So much for all his big talk. After telling Rufioh to grit his teeth and face his problems with his matesprit, Cronus was unable to do the same. He was such a hypocrite. After all this was dealt with, he _would _find Rufioh. Cronus knew he could at least do that much. "And I don't knowv howv long..."

"Go away? You know you can't go very far, don't you? At least, if you want to stay within the bound of the memories of our peers you can't. You weren't thinking of trying to venture further than that, were you? I mean, it might be possible, I can't see why not, but that's a rather large undertaking. Though I admit, I've been curious about our abilities to travel within the bubbles myself..." Kankri rambled on. Cronus waited letting him get it all out. He didn't want to have to be talking over Kankri.

"Wvell, not so much go awvay as just... take some time to myself. Wvork on my music or wvhatevwer." Cronus said. He didn't have his intentions clearly laid out but he still felt like he was being dishonest with Kankri. Because he was going away. Not very far, but far enough. But he couldn't tell Kankri what he was planning on doing. He tried to tell himself that it was for Rufioh's sake; if Cronus told anyone he had a theory as to where Rufioh had gone there was a chance if could get back to Horuss or someone else. At least, Cronus tried to tell himself that was his reason for leaving Kankri in the dark. But then again, maybe he would just take some time alone. After all, he had no idea if he would even be able to find Rufioh. Or if Rufioh would want to talk to him if he could.

"Ah. I see. Well, I appreciate you telling me this. Do you know how long you'll be gone? Not that I want to hold you to a strict schedule, but I'd like to know a basic timeframe if at all possible." Kankri said, something slightly mechanical in his tone. Cronus had known that Kankri wouldn't ask him to stay, but he couldn't help feel a little disappointed anyways.

"I don't knowv. I'll try not to be too long but I don't wvant you to wvorry about it. Wvhen I'm gone, you don't havwe to wvorry about me or anything. You can just go back to the wvay that things wvere before wve wvere together." Cronus said, the hollow feeling in his gut growing stronger.

"Cronus, I know that sometimes confronting someone is hard, but I cannot believe you would take it this far. If you want to break thing off with me I will not fight you on it, but I cannot _believe _that you would try to remove your own responsibility for your own wants and needs by pretending that this is about "sparing me." Quite frankly, I'm a little appalled at the way that you're treating me." Cronus was glad that they'd gone back to his hive, because Kankri was openly yelling at him at this point.

"Kan, it's not like that. It's just- I really do have to leavwe for a wvhile. And wvell, I don't really knowv wvhat you evwen wvant from me at this point." Cronus said quietly, not having the energy to raise his voice. "I'm not givwing up on you."

Kankri looked like he was about to argue but then his face softened and his shoulders slumped. "Come back." He said giving Cronus a long, serious look. "Go, take however time you need to. And I won't worry about us. But come back." He added.

Cronus didn't say anything. He wanted to leave now more than ever. To run far away from everyone and everything. He couldn't look Kankri in the eyes, not even when he drew in close, placed a soft kiss against the seadwellers lips and then turned to leave.

"I think, if you really are leaving that this is better. That it's better that we break things off, that is. So thank you for telling me you were going." Kankri said without turning around before leaving the hive.

It took all the restraint Cronus had not to bolt out the door as soon as Kankri was gone. He didn't want to be in his hive anymore; he didn't want to be anywhere. That, or he wanted to be wherever Rufioh was. Gone. Kankri was right; he didn't want to get out of his own problems. He wanted to escape.


	13. Into the night

Cronus wasn't sure exactly how he would get of of the area he'd lived his whole life and spent the entirety of his death, but it proved to be much easier than he had anticipated. He went over to where Rufioh's hive was, and from there he headed in the general direction that his moirail had pointed when he mentioned living out in the forest with Damara and the lost weeaboos. As much as he doubted his ability to complete his mission and find Rufioh, at least it would give him something to do. Better to have a concrete goal to focus on than go wandering about aimlessly.

As he made his was into the forest he found a small side path. The trail was not clearly marked, and it was evident that it had not been used in a while, but it was there. It did strike Cronus as a little odd that whoever's memory this was hadn't been here during a time when it was heavily trafficked. But maybe that meant that it was Rufoh's, and better yet that it was recent. As much as Cronus didn't want to hope, he couldn't avoid a little optimism. He hadn't expected to even get this far. To say he had a lead was a bit of a stretch, but this seemed like a pretty plausible place to start looking.

Rufioh had often talked about how relaxed and carefree he had felt during his time out here, but Cronus wasn't feeling either of those things now. If not for the faint path that he was following he would have sworn he was going in circles, and even with a trail laid out for him he couldn't be completely certain he wasn't. The deeper he went the sillier he felt, and he would have gone home if not for a clinging, slightly hysterical desperation that forced him to keep his feet moving. He knew if wasn't likely that anything would come of his expedition, but he had to do _something._

It had still been light out when Cronus had left his hive. He'd gone out before the sun had set, not wanting to risk running into anyone he knew. Well, really he just didn't want to run into Kankri.

It was dark now. Cronus wasn't sure how long he'd been out here. He couldn't imagine why anyone would have gone this far, but whoever's memory he was delving into didn't fade as he make his way further into the forest. The trees were getting thicker, but the path remained. And then, when the path grew so faint it was barely noticeable, Cronus saw something ahead. It was still dark, but there was a hint of light. As he kept going the trees began to thin out again.

And then he broke into a large clearing dotted with massive trees with red leaves and an elaborate lacework of platforms, beams and roofs that came together to make half-formed hives in the trees. There were a few ropes connecting the trees and as he got closer he saw that all the platforms had to be at least twenty or so feet off the ground. Cronus couldn't help but feel a glimmer of hope. This had to be it; the hideout of the lost weeaboos. It fit in with all the stories that Rufioh had told him. That being the case, who could the memory belong to if not Rufioh?

Cronus walked up to the first of the trees, gazing up at the platform above. There was no ladder or any branches within reach. After looking around a little, he determined that this was the case with all the platforms. That would make sense if Rufioh really were there: he could just fly up.

Cronus was about to call out to Rufioh when something occurred to him. Damara was still out here, and she had been in the lost weeaboos as well. And according to Meenah she spent a lot of time out here after she had Rufioh had split up. What would she do if he showed up looking for Rufioh?

Wringing his hands in frustration, Cronus sat at the base of one of the trees, setting down the guitar he had brought with him more out of habit than anything else. He tied playing a little, but the couldn't make the music sound right, and eventually gave that up. He stayed there as the night around him got darker, not knowing what to do else. He didn't want to go back to his hive, but he should have known that this was pointless.

Emotionally exhausted almost to the point of delirium, Cronus thought he was imagining things when he heard the music. It was faint, but it had to be close. He stood up, grabbing his own guitar and tentatively following the sound. As he went, he wondered idly how long he had slept. There was a little more light filtering through the trees than when he had fallen asleep, but weather it was getting darker or lighter remained a mystery.

Cronus followed the music. It took him in a different direction than the tree houses, but further from home as well. Things were a little more wild here, and there was no hint that anyone had been here recently, but as he kept going the music got louder.

Cronus felt like he might cry when he got close enough to recognize the music. It was one of his pieces. One of the newer ones; he remembered working on it with Rufioh. He stood by the base of the tree that the music was coming for and started playing along. After a moment he began to sing, having added some lyrics since he's last played it for Rufioh.

The song ended and Cronus waited. There was no sound, nothing. For a moment, he thought he had imagined the whole scene. Then there was a soft rustling from above and a light breeze, and Rufioh descended, hovering a couple inches off the ground and beaming at him like he was some long-awaited wriggling-day gift.

"Cronus! I can't believe you're here! How did you find me?" Rufioh asked, sounding just as elated as he looked.

"Wvell I it wvasn't easy. Wvhat are you evwen doing out here?" Cronus demanded, crossing his arms. His relief at finding Rufioh was steadily fading into annoyance. "Wvhat made you think it wvas okay for you to just disappear like that?"

"Well, I just needed some space. I mean, after everything that happened with Horuss and all. And I'd been wanting to come back for a while... I don't know, I guess it was just time or something? I guess I should have said something to you though." Rufioh said sheepishy with a timid smile and a small shrug, which Cronus met with a scowl.

"Yeah you should havwe." Cronus said sternly before cracking a smile. He was sick of chewing Rufioh out; that kind of deal just wasn't his scene. He knew that Rufioh got the message. That he knew that he was worried.

"Well what now? I guess we should probably go home..." Rufioh said dejectedly. Cronus felt similarly pessimistic about whatever might be waiting for him when they returned.

"No! I mean, wve don't hawve to. If you wvant to hang out here for a couple days I'd be fine wvith that. Really." Cronus said, sounding a little more hasty than he had meant to. Rufioh raised an eyebrow.

"If you're sure. I mean, I'd love the company." He said with a slight smile working it's way onto the corners of his mouth. After a moment he met Cronus' gaze with a full-on conspiratorial grin which Cronus returned with the more enthusiasm that he had been able to muster about anything in days.

"So wvhat now? You nevwer told me all that much about wvhat you did out here." Cronus said, pressing his palms together egerly. Rufioh had talked about living here with the lost weeaboos on multiple occasions but he never went into all that much detail of it.

"We just did whatever! That was the best part, really. No responsibilities. I mean, I guess there were some. Back when we were alive there were a whole lot of us, so we sorta had to take care of each other, but now I guess it's just us. So we can do what we want. Actually, I'm pretty glad you found me, I woulda gotten pretty bored pretty quick out here all by myself." Rufioh said. Now that Cronus had made it clear that he wasn't here to drag Rufoh home or chew him out he seemed to have a lot more energy. As he had the first time he'd really hung out with Rufioh, he found his moirail's enthusiasm was contagious. Maybe staying out here would be an exciting challenge rather than simply a cowardly escape.

"Wvell that sounds okay. But you knowv, it's not like wve really had any real responsibilities before. I mean, wve're dead, so wve can sort of do wvhatevwer anywvays, can't wve?" Cronus asked. He still didn't completely understand why Rufioh had left, not to mention more than a little hurt that Rufioh hadn't told him he was leaving.

"Yeah, but we still had to deal with some stuff. I mean, you're right, about us not having a lottta responsibilities but all the more reason we should leave, right? There's nothing to keep us." Rufioh said with a laugh. Cronus narrowed his eyes. Rufioh could be a little irresponsible at times, but this seemed like a bit much, even for him.

"Makes sense. So I guess this means you finally managed to break things off with Horuss, huh?" Cronus asked. If nothing else, at least there was that. He had known that that relationship had been weighing on Rufioh a lot lately.

"Well, uh..." Rufioh bit his lip, avoiding Cronus' gaze. "Sort of?" He said, finally meeting his morails' eyes with a timid glance.

"Sort of? Wvell I guess that's better than nothing. I uh... I split up wvith Kan." Cronus figured he should probably get this out of the way. And even though he was still upset and confused about what had happened between him and Kankri, he almost felt okay talking about it with Rufioh. It was actually a bit of a relief to have someone to talk to about it. "So I guess wve're sort of in the same boat." Except that they weren't at all. Rufioh had managed to end a relationship that he had been trying to get out of for sweeps, whereas Cronus had wrecked on of the best things going on for him.

"Shit, sorry to hear that." It was the first time that Cronus had heard Rufioh cuss without biting it off since he had started seeing Horuss, and oddly enough, it made him feel a little better. At least things were looking up for his moirail.

"It's fine. I mean, it's not but... It wvas getting really wveird between us. I split up with him but... I don't evwen think he wvanted to be my matesprit anymore. But then he acted all sad wvhen I said I was leavwing..." Cronus scowled. Although he was releived to be here with Rufioh, a part of him felt bad about leaving things with Kankri in the state he had. They probably could have worked out whatever weirdness there was between them if Cronus had stuck around.

"Well, maybe it's good that you're giving him some space. I mean, I don't really know Kankri, but that seems a little weird." Rufioh suggested. Cronus nodded, starting to force a smile onto his face and realizing he didn't have to. Even just being here with Rufioh had taken a huge weight off his mind.

"Yeah. I hope so." Cronus agreed.

"Come on, let me show you around!" Rufioh said after a moment, getting up and flapping his wings so he was hovering a few inches off the ground. Cronus got up as well, dusting himself off and retreiving his guitar before following the organe and red clad figure of his moirail into the night.


	14. Crashing

AN: I know I usually do these at the end of the chapter, but I just wanted to start off by apologizing for the lack of updates! I'm still dedicated to seeing this fic through, but I was very sick for a very long time and was unable to work on it for a few months because of that, and then I started my first term of college, so it's taken me a while to get back into the swing of things. If you're still reading after having to wait almost three months for an update, thanks for sticking with it! I should be back to updating at least once a week now.

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Cronus hadn't expected the blanket of relief that had surrounded him and made everything seem happy and bright again to last as long as it did. For a few days at least, his delight at having actually found Rufioh distracted him from everything else. Rufioh shower him around the hideout and put the ladders back down so he could come and go as he pleased, though Cronus planning on leaving just yet. At any rate, he wasn't going to go without Rufioh.

It was unexpectedly peaceful, too. Initially Cronus had been a little creeped out by how quiet it was, how empty. Normally he would have hated this sort of thing, but Rufioh was there, keeping him from getting lonely.

In fact, the longer Cronus stayed, the harder it was for him to leave. Every evening Cronus told himself that tonight was the night that he would sit Rufioh down and have a long, serious talk with him about why he needed to come home. After all, that was what he had come to do. But then evening rolled around and Rufioh got up, joining Cronus, who usually woke up first, and distracting him with ideas for a new piece of music, or leading him away from their camp to show him more of his favorite hideouts. And the longer they stayed out there, the less important it seemed to Cronus that either of them should go home.

Eventually, though not entirely consciously, Cronus decided not to go back. He was happy with Rufioh. He didn't bring up leaving with Rufioh because now he knew how his moirail felt. Occasionally he was haunted by his matesprit's one request: That he return once he found Rufioh. But then he got to wondering about other things: About wether he and Kankri really could be called matesprits anymore, and if, once he had the time to think it though Kankri really _would _want him to come back anymore. A part of Cronus couldn't shake the worry that Kankri would change his mind. And that was not something that he particularly wanted to face.

Cronus had been furious with Rufioh when he'd left, but he understood why he did. So he wasn't going to press the issue. Rufioh seemed perfectly content to stay out in the forest with Cronus for the rest of eternity, and the longer Cronus stuck around, the more agreeable that idea seemed. And talking about why Rufioh had left would only bring up the topic of the impending date of their return, which wasn't something Cronus was in a hurry to do.

But Cronus was still hurting. He was sad that he had had to come out here to find Rufioh; that his moirail had left without saying a word to him. And as happy as he was to be reunited with Rufioh, he missed Kankri. Rufioh hadn't been in a talkative mood, and it was so _quiet. _He worried that he had done the wrong thing, leaving when he had. Maybe he should have stuck around to tough it out. But then again, Kankri had told him to go. He was still amazed at the way that things had ended. Kankri had been infinitely more kind than he deserved, even when Cronus had jumped ship.

Since arriving at Rufioh's hideout, Cronus had spent every waking moment with his moirail. So he was surprised when, after weeks spending their days together without parting, he awoke alone.

Cronus did a full sweep if the hideout and the surrounding area. He still didn't know the forest well enough to go very far, but he was learning how to get around. After searching for hours without a trace of his moirail, he decided to return to camp. Rufioh would turn up eventually. He flew off to be alone sometimes, but he always came back.

A loud crash sounded as Cronus drew close to the hideout. Rufioh would never be that noisy. He was light on his feet, and most of the time he just flew around anyways. But who else knew where this place was? To his knowledge it was only Damara. Cronus quickened his pace, hoping that his guess was wrong, and wondering what else it could possibly be.

Cronus glanced around as he climbed the ladder-Rufioh had let them down after Cronus arrived- to the platform where the sound had come from, pulling himself over the edge and looking around Cautiously. To his surprise, there was only Rufioh, looking a little battered but grinning nonetheless.

"Are you alright? Wvhat happened?" Cronus asked, not sure that to make of Rufioh's disheveled state.

Rufioh glanced around, and it was a moment before he answered Cronus.

"Me? Yeah, I'm fine. I just went out a little further. I wanted to visit some older memories... I don't really know why. I just got tired of sitting around and sleeping all the time, you know? I mean, not that hanging out with you isn't great-" Rufioh's tone started out distracted, but he quickly backpedaled, giving Cronus an apologetic smile.

Cronus punched Rufioh lightly on the arm, laughing a little. He had been so worried, but now if felt so silly.

"Nah, I knowv wvhat you meant. I'vwe been getting a little antsy myself." Cronus responded. He though briefly about weather that might mean that it was finally time for him and Rufioh to go home, but dismissed it, as always.

"Cronus... Uh, how long exactly were you planning on staying out here with me?" Rufioh asked, casting and anxious-looking glance at Cronus as he waiter for a reply. Cronus frowned, mulling the question over. He could just make something up, but he wanted to be honest with Rufioh. Though the fact that his moirail was asking him this question at all was a bad sign. Did this really mean that Rufioh intended to stay out here forever?

"Eh, I'm not sure. I wvas thinking I wvould just go back wvhen ever you were." Cronus felt as though he were shrinking into himself as the words left his mouth. This was the perfect chance to confront Rufioh and convince him to come home, and Cronus was letting it slip through his fingers. He wasted to say something, but what if Rufioh blew him off? He would probably just dismiss it and say that everything was fine.

"Oh. Huh. Well, great." Rufioh said with an uncomfortable smile. Cronus balled his hands into firsts. He didn't want to fight with Rufioh, but he couldn't take it any more.

"I came out here to bring you home! Evwen though you left me, too. Wvhat wvould you havwe done if I hadn't found you?" It was something that Cronus tried not to think about, but the truth was, he had no idea what would have happened to Rufioh if he hadn't gone looking for him. It wasn't as if his moirail had left him a note saying where he had gone. There were signs that he wanted to leave, but if Cronus hadn't pieced them together, he never would have known where Rufioh had gone. He knew that Rufioh didn't want to be followed, even by him, which was why he didn't tell anyone he was going. So what was Cronus even doing here now? Why had he gone looking for his moirail when he had made it clear he didn't want to be found? Cronus bit his lip, trying to hide his feelings about this revelation from Rufioh with little success.

"I'm sure I would have come home eventually. I mean, it's sort of because of you that I'm still out here." Rufioh said the words with a smile and it was clear that he didn't mean any harm by them, but his statement hit Cronus like a punch in the gut. He had come out here with the purpose of bringing Rufioh home, and here he was the reason for him staying out here. Rufioh noticed Cronus dejected reason to his statement and backpedaled. "Not in a bad way! I think needed space! I mean, I wanted to go right back home almost as soon as I left. I was going to go home and apologize to Horuss for taking off on him, or maybe just pretend like nothing had ever even happened. That would have been bad, right? I made myself stay at least for a few days, but I had made up my mind to go home by when you found me."

"Oh. Wvell I guess you havwe a point." Cronus said sullenly. He still felt like he could have talked Rufioh through dealing with Horuss in a way that didn't involve hiding out in old memories in the middle of nowhere for extended periods of time. He still wasn't sure exactly how long it was that he had Rufioh had been out here; being away from his hive for so long did funny things to his perception of time.

"So, we're going home then?" Rufioh asked, tilting his head to one side and sounding a lot less resigned to the idea that Cronus had expected him to.

"Yeah, I guess wve are." Cronus said with a smile. Rufioh held out a clenched fist, and Cronus stared at it blankly for a moment before he realized what was going on and touched his first to his moirails, earning his a grin from the bronze-blood.

Cronus was both excited and terrified at the prospect of going back, both for the same reason; He would see Kankri again. Cronus could avoid people with the best of them, but he was still bound to run into Kankri eventually. Unless he stayed inside for the rest of eternity. He had to admit, he was slightly tempted by the idea. And what if he ran into some alternate Kankri? He'd ran into some of the others from his session, but had yet to come across an alternate version of his ex-matesprit, though he had met the younger Vantas briefly. Cronus didn't know if he would be able to handle that.

"What are you gonna do when you get back though?" Rufioh asked, giving Cronus a thoroughly welcome distraction from his current train of thought. Cronus shrugged.

"Wvhat do you mean? I'll do the same stuff I alwvays havwe, I guess. Maybe I'll try to find myself a kismesis." Cronus joked, waggling his eyebrows a little. He responded casually, but he wasn't quite sure what Rufioh was getting at.

"Haha, seriously? Honestly, I'm surprise that you've had so much trouble finding one so far. It's not like you don't have plenty of unlikable qualities." Rufioh said with a small laugh.

"So then... tomorrow?" Rufioh asked after a moment of silence. Cronus frowned a moment before realizing what he meant. He swallowed a lump in his throat, the carefree mood he'd managed to get into just moments before having completely evaporated. Finding himself unable to respond verbally, nodding woodenly at Rufioh without actually meeting his gaze.

"Tomorrowv." Cronus agreed, moving over to Rufioh was and sitting down, leaning his on his shoulder, not wanting his moirail to see the torn expression he wore.


	15. Homecoming

Cronus woke up early on the night that he and Rufioh had agreed to return home. Rufioh probably wouldn't be up for hours, but he didn't want to attempt to get back to sleep. He untangled himself from the still-sleeping Rufioh and moved to the edge of the tree-house platform where they usually slept, looking out over the tops of the trees at the steadily darkening sky. They had planned to leave early, but Cronus didn't feel the need to wake Rufioh just yet. As anxious as he had been about his impending return, tonight an odd wave of serenity had enveloped him. He was going home, not alone, but with Rufioh. He had very nearly accomplished what he had set out to do, and that was the important thing.

Unsure of what to do and not wanting to wake Rufioh, Cronus pulled out a cigarette out of his jacket and rolled it between his fingers. He tucked it behind his fin and climbed to the ground, milling about the hideout and whistling softly to himself, sort of wishing he had something else to do. That was one good thing about going home; Although Rufioh loved wandering around in the woods with no apparent goal, Cronus felt like it got old pretty quick. At least when he got home he'd have something to do, even if it was just laying around and watching movies. Despite all of his worries, it felt good to finally be going home.

After wandering around a little, Cronus went back to the hideout. He hadn't been gone long, but Rufioh was up by the time he returned. He heard music as he climbed the ladder, and smiled a little.

Rufioh beamed at Cronus as he made his way onto the platform, and Cronus returned his grin. He reminded himself that no matter how horrible things might be with Kankri when he got home, at least he wouldn't have to go through it alone this time.

"So, are you ready to head out?" Rufioh ask as Cronus made his way over. Cronus nodded, collecting the few things he'd brought with him, and then they were off. As Cronus followed Rufioh along barely-marked trails through the forest, he got the odd sensation that this wasn't really happening to him.

Despite having left fairly early, it was almost morning by the time Cronus as Rufioh had arrived home. Both were relieved about this, as it meant that there was almost no one about.

"Do you wanna go over to my hive for a bit?" Rufioh asked, nudging Cronus in the ribs with his elbow.

"No, I think I just wvanna go home and get some shuteye. You gonna be okay alone for a bit?" Cronus asked. It felt weird to be going home at all, and especially to be going without Rufioh. They hadn't been gone a horribly long time, but Cronus had still managed to fall into a rhythm staying out in the woods with Rufioh. He was honestly a little glad for the chance to have some time to himself.

"Of course! Though honestly, I should probably go try and talk to Horuss. You know, break things off properly..." Rufioh mumbled sheepishly.

"Okay. Wvell... come by later and let me know how it goes?" Cronus asked, though he felt he was being a little clingy. It had been different when it was just the two of them out in the woods, but now that they were back, Rufioh had other social obligations.

"Yeah, I'll come by later." Rufioh agreed before turning and flying off in the direction of his own hive.

Mercifully, Cronus didn't run into anyone of the way back to his own hive. He propped his guitar in the corner and tossed his jacked on the floor, kicking off his shoes as he headed to his bedroom, intending to just go back to sleep. He didn't want to deal with anything right now; he wished he could just sleep away his problems. At least things were fixed between him and Rufioh, for the most part anyways. Cronus was still a little hurt over the way that Rufioh had taken off, but he didn't want to dwell on that. Too many other things were messed up for him, and he desperately wanted to have one thing that was good, even if he was deceiving himself.

Cronus moved to the couch and put on whatever movie had been on when he'd left his hive; it turned out to be some of Rufioh's weird troll anime. He could never follow the plots of those things, but he didn't really care, he really just wanted some noise in the background so he didn't have to think as he lay there moping and staring at the ceiling.

Cronus was sure exactly as what point when he had fallen asleep, or how long he'd been out for, but it was dark still-or maybe again- when he woke up. He got up and decided he was probably overdue for a shower anyways. Sure, he could just remember himself into clean clothes whenever he wanted, but going extended periods of time without showering still didn't feel right. Plus, it wreaked havoc with his hair.

He went to the ablution block and stripped before deciding on a bath instead, filing the bath with water so hot it was almost scalding. Still, as he climbed in and submerged himself, it felt oddly comforting, or at least momentarily distracting.

Cronus stayed in the tub until the water went cold, then got up and dressed, humming softly to himself and styling his hair as if it were an ordinary evening. He supposed really it was, only he wasn't quite sure how to go back to his old routine. His worries about Kankri threw everything off- he didn't want to risk running into his ex-matesprit. But he told himself that he couldn't sit around moping all day. At the very least he should go see Rufioh and ask him how his talk with Horuss had gone.

Heading out, Cronus made a beeline for Rufioh's hive, not wanting to run into anyone. Unfortunately, he had no such luck. He'd gotten about halfway to his destination when he practically ran into Kankri and Porrim strolling arm in arm. Cronus froze for a moment, glancing back and forth from his ex-matesprit to his maybe-moirail, completely at a loss for words. Kankri seemed equally stunned for a moment, his eyes meeting Cronus' for a fraction of a second before he began staring intently at the ground just in front of his feet.

"Hello, Cronus. On your way to see Rufioh?" Porrim asked coolly. Cronus tried to focus on her face so his gaze wouldn't wander to Kankri, but that was almost worse. He had no idea what was going through Kankri's mind, but Porrim was giving the kind of glare that could almost turn someone to stone.

"Yeah, that's right." Cronus said with a nervous laugh, fighting the urge to let his gaze drift over to Kankri for even a fraction of a second.

"Ah, I see. Well, give him my regards. The two of you have been making yourselves scarce lately." Porrim said, raising an eyebrow before turning and sweeping past him, Kankri in tow. Cronus didn't allow himself to look until they had past, but then found himself staring after them-well, after Kankri really- until the two had disappeared.

After another moment of staring off into space, Cronus came to his senses and attempted to shake off any thoughts of Kankri and what might have been going through his head. He picked up is pace, now in even more of a hurry to get to Rufioh's hive and away from his own thoughts.

It was a few moments after Cronus knocked before Rufioh answered the door, and when he did he saw that his moirail was clothed only in his boxes and coated in a layer of slime. He nodded to Rufioh, making his way inside and taking a seat on the couch.

"Do you wvant me to come back? I didn't mean to wvake you up." Cronus muttered. Rufioh shook his head and left the room. Cronus wasn't sure weather or not that was an affirmative to his question, so he just waited as he heard water running in the other room.

After a few minutes Rufioh returned, now clad in a stretched-out t-shirt in addition to his boxers, and flopped down next to Cronus on the couch.

"So what's up?" Rufioh asked, letting his head loll back, gazing up at the ceiling. He sounded worn out.

"Not much, I guess. I ran into Porrim and Kankri on my way ovwer here." Cronus muttered, still note sure that he wanted to talk about that yet. He'd known that seeing Kankri again would be hard, but it had turned out ten times worse than he imagined. What was he supposed to do now? Kankri had insisted that Cronus come back, presumably so they could work things out, but his behavior today hadn't exactly given him the impression that rekindling their matespritship was on the forefront of his mind. Cronus didn't know if it would really be a good idea for him and Kankri to get back together either. What if he just went back to being all cagey and standoffish again?

"Shit, how did that go? I mean he said he wanted to talk to you when you came back, right?" Rufioh asked, which made Cronus feel even worse. He had had a plan! Go off and fix things with Rufioh, and give Kankri some space, which was clearly what he needed. And then when he came back, everything would be fine. It would all go back to normal.

"I don't knowv. I mean, wve didn't evwen talk. He wvas wvith Porrim though, so I don't knowv if he wvanted to." Cromus mumbled. "Anywvays, did you talk to Horuss yet?" He asked, not wanting to have to think about Kankri anymore if he could avoid it.

"Yeah, I did actually! I went okay. I mean, he was really freaked out about my leaving and all, but I managed to calm him down, I guess. And then I told him that I wanted to break things off with him permanently. I feel kinda horrible, but... I'm also a little relieved, you know?" Rufioh said, his feelings about the matter evident in his tone and expression.

"Wvell I'm proud of you." Cronus said genuinely, wishing he could just be like Rufioh and face his problems head on. He really had been planning on going to see Kankri once he got back, but running into him with Porrim tonight had made Cronus start to reconsider. Cronus had been worried that Kankri would change his mind about wanting him to come back, and it looked like his fears were coming true.

"So are you going to talk to Kankri then?" Rufioh asked, steering Cronus back down the avenue of thought that Cronus had been trying to get away from.

"Yeah, I guess I should." Cronus mumbled, burying his face in his hands. Rufioh reached over and gently papped him on the shoulder, before running his hands soothing through Cronus' hair.

"Hey, don't worry. I think you can do this." Cronus wasn't positive that Rufioh's affirmation was genuine, but it made him feel a little better either way. And no matter what happened with Kankri, at least he didn't have to go through it alone. At least Rufioh was home; Cronus didn't think he'd even get that far. He told himself that taking to Kankri couldn't be as hard as tracking Rufioh down and bringing him home, but he wasn't thoroughly convinced.


	16. Reunion

Cronus wasn't sure if ghosts could actually get sick, but he definitely felt like he might be as he paced back and forth in front of Kankri's door less than forty eight hours after returning home. He'd been out there almost twenty minutes without knocking. He'd actually turned around and left twice, but he made himself come back. As unpleasant as this encounter had the potential to be, Cronus could almost justify it with just the fact that he would get to see Kankri again. Taking a deep breath, he brought his first to the door and gave it three sharp raps.

Kankri answered the door, looking a little shocked to see Cronus. Cronus guessed he'd probably feel the same if he were in Kankri's shoes.

"Hey Kan... Mind if I come in?" Cronus asked, shrugging his shoulders slightly and giving Kankri a slightly sheepish smile. Kankri frowned up at him, and for a moment Cronus was sure he was a about to send him away, but then he seemed to relax a little, dropping the scowl.

"Of course. Make yourself comfortable." Kankri said, waving him in to his hive and leading the way to his living block settling on the loveseat and looking up at Cronus expectantly. Cronus hovered in the doorway for a moment before closing the door and going to join Kankri, though he took the chair across from him.

"I haven't seen much of you lately. Or Rufioh, for that matter. Is everything alright with the two of you?" Kankri asked, his tone light and conversational, though this time Kankri was the once who wouldn't meet Cronus' gaze.

"Yeah, wve're great. Rufioh's just been all bent out of shape because he broke things off with Horuss. So I'vwe been sticking with him. You knowv, just trying to help him get through it." Cronus said. It wasn't exactly a lie, but it was still twisting the truth, and Cronus felt a little guilty about not being completely honest with Kankri. He tried to remind himself that he was under no obligation to tell Kankri anything, but that just made him feel worse.

"Well, that's good. After all, one of the many purposes of moraileigence is to smooth any issues with your palemates other quadrants. Sounds like you've already been more successful with that than I ever was." Kankri said with a small, uncomfortable-looking smile in Cronus' direction.

"Wvell, you and Porrim were never officially pale though, were you?" Cronus asked, regretting the words the moment they left his mouth, and a look of annoyance passed over Kankri's face. Him being more pissed off was really not what Cronus needed right now.

"No, I suppose we weren't." Kankri said, turning his chin upwards a little as the words left his mouth, his tone cold. This was really not going well for Cronus.

Cronus squares his shoulders and took a deep breath. Making conversation with Kankri seemed to be getting more difficult, but maybe he was going about this the wrong way. Maybe tiptoeing around Kankri was just making things worse.

"Kan, I promised you I wvould come back, and I did. And I still wvant to be your matesprit, if you'll havwe me. But I don't wvant to stick around and make an ass of myself if that's not gonna happen." Cronus said, trying to be firm, but his voice ended up wavering a little towards the end. Still, he help Kankri's gaze at least.

"Of course I still want to be with you! I apologize if that was the impression that I gave you, it was not my intention. It's just been a while, and I'm not really content with the way that we left things between us." Kankri said, sounding a little hasty. Cronus breathed a small sigh of relief.

"I knowv. I agree wvith you, and I'm sorry for taking off like that. It's just that I had so much else on my mind, and I wvas worried about Rufioh. He and I wvere havwing a little trouble before that, and..." Cronus trailed off, not really wanting to get into the part about how his moirail had abandoned him. "Wve both needed to get awvay from things a little. At least, that's wvhat I though at the time. And really, it probably wvas. I mean, wve wvere already mad at each other, and it could have gotten a lot wvorse." Cronus said a little defensively.

"You're right. I just assumed you would be gone a shorter amount of time than you were. I suppose a bit of the fault lies with me for making that sort of assumption. At any rate, it's good to have you back." Kankri said. Finally his expression softened a little, and he gave Cronus a bit of a smile.

"Thanks, Kan." Cronus said, relived that Kankri seemed to be warming up to him again. He wasn't sure what to do now though. Kankri had said that he wouldn't worry about their relationship while Cronus was gone, but did that mean that now that Cronus was back they were officially matesprits again? He wasn't sure. The way Kankri was looking at him made it clear that his previous assertion had a fair bit of truth to it, but Cronus wasn't sure what it meant beyond that. He wanted to ask, but the words just weren't coming to him, so Cronus decided to try a different approach.

Kankri gave Cronus a baffled look as the seadweller leaned in, placing a hand on his waist and drawing him close, but much to Cronus' relief, he relaxed a little when his intentions made themselves clear. As he kissed Kankri, the smaller troll leaned into the kiss a little, wrapping his arms around Cronus' neck as he did so. Cronus practically collapsed with the weight of the relief that washed over him.

"So I take it to mean that wvere good then?" Cronus asked anxiously, giving what he imagined to be his most charming grin. Kankri sighed, smiling a little.

"Yes, we are "good" as you put it. I understand the importance of moirailegence and don't fault you for taking the measures you did to secure that relationship." Kankri said. Cronus was relived; Kankri seemed to be back to his usual self.

After this, things seemed to go back to normal to an extent. It felt a little odd to Cronus how quickly Kankri had adjusted to his being back; he seemed to be acting as if he and Cronus had never split up. Still, Cronus tried not to dwell on that fact too much; it was probably a good sign. It must mean that Kankri just wanted things to go back to normal as well.

Later that night they ended up heading over to Cronus' hive. He'd done a lot of composing while he was away, and he wanted to share his new music with Kankri. He played his songs for Kankri, who was appreciative in an apologetic and vague way as he usually was with that sort of thing, but it was still nice. Cronus was glad that thing seemed like they really were all patched up between him and Kankri, but he still felt a little awkward. He wasn't sure how to act around his matesprit.

"I really do like the music. I feel like you've made a lot of improvement since you last played for me as well." Kankri reassured Cronus what seemed like the hundredth time. Cronus smiled in appreciation- if nothing else it probably meant he really was forgiven. It took a certain type of person to get the unfailingly blunt Kankri to misrepresent his feelings of anything.

"Wvell, I'm glad you think so, Kan." Cronus said, setting his guitar aside and scooting closer to Kankri, giving him a quick peck on the cheek. He wrapped his arms around his matesprit, pulling his closer, and Kankri leaned back into his chest, giving a contented sigh. Cronus was happy to have this closeness back; it hit him again just how much he had missed Kankri during the time they were apart. Had he really almost given up _this_? He had, and it drove Cronus crazy that that was the case.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, Kanrki turned around and kissed Cronus, wrapping his arms around his neck. Cronus responded, not as hasty as usual, as he was still worried that he would end up scaring Kankri off. The fact that things had been resolved between them so quickly felt like a good dream that he could wake from at any moment to find a cold, sobering reality. Cronus was determined that he wouldn't mess anything more up between him and Kankri.

They continued in this manned for a while, exchanging slow and passionate kisses and not taking things any further. Cronus wanted to, but he worried that this was too soon. The air of tension between him and Kankri was gradually dissipating, but much too slowly for Cronus' liking.

Not for the first time, Kankri surprised Cronus by being the one to take things further. Cronus was a little shocked when, not far into their make-out session, Kankri slid one of his hands down his chest and began palming his bulge through his jeans. This was moving pretty quickly, considering it was Kankri. What wasn't surprising was how quickly after this he pulled back, completely untangling himself from Cronus.

Kankri crossed his arms and began staring intently at the floor, his expression unreadable. Cronus sighed, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and giving him a gentle squeeze.

"You alright, Kan?" Cronus asked. He was a little worried that he had taken things too far, but he and Kankri had done far more than this before. Still, that was before he had left. And things were obviously different now, as much as Cronus wished they weren't. At least, he wished they were how they had been when he and Kankri had first gotten together. Back when everything was easy and fun. Well, maybe they had had some problems from the get go, but not like they did now. Cronus felt now more than ever like he had to tiptoe around his matesprit.

"I'm fine. I'm just having a little trouble re-adjusting to this. It's been a while, and... I'm just not quite sure what I want at this moment. I know that my intentions were unclear before, and I had resolved to make up my mind before making any attempts at rekindling our flushed relationship, and I suppose I shouldn't have rushed back into things before I was sure." Kankri muttered, looking deeply upset. It seemed to Cronus that Kankri wasn't being completely honest with him on the matter, but he couldn't imagine what else it could be.

"You mean wvith the physical side of things? I already told you, Kan, I don't mind! Take all the time you need to make up your mind about that." Cronus said. In all honesty, Cronus would of course prefer it if Kankri did decide on moving things forward physically with them, but he'd been prepared for a relationship without pailing from the start; it would in no way be a deal-breaker for him if that didn't happen. Kankri frowned, looking like he was about to object or counter what Cronus had said, but then leaned back and sighed.

"Still, I don't feel it's very fair to you." Kankri said quietly. Cronus sort of agreed; at least, the back and forth was frustrating, but he didn't want to say anything more on the matter. Things were already so tense between him and Kankri, and he worried it would only make things worse. "It'd be one thing if I knew how I felt one way or another, but I don't just yet."

"Wvell then I'm here to help you figure it out." Cronus said, just wanting things to be okay. Kankri leaned back into him, and allowed Cronus to wrap his arms around him. Cronus rested his cheeks against the top of Kankri's head, still having the feeling that there was something else the matter, but afraid to say anything. Nothing about his and Kankri's reunion had gone the way that he had expected, and while there were some reassurances, for the most part it left Cronus with more doubts about their relationship than ever.

* * *

AN: Remember how I promised you guys weekly updates? Well, I wrote that update, and then midterms happened. I was really busy with school, and consequently unable to write, so this chapter is a little late. I'm sorry for the delays, and I'll try to stick to the weekly update schedule better in the future!


	17. Reversal

The feeling Cronus had that Kankri was keeping something from him persisted for weeks. On the surface, he and Kankri resumed their relationship and all was well, but in actuality things between the two of them were as tense as they had ever been. Cronus tried to talk to Kankri about it, but every time he did, Kankri told him that it was something he had to figure out on his own. Cronus could respect that, but he wanted to be able to help Kankri out if he could. He hated feeling like his hands were tied.

That, and Rufioh seemed off again. Cronus didn't have all that much time to worry about what was going on with Kankri beyond those few conversations immediately following their reunion, because he was worried about his moirail. So when things finally turned around for Rufioh, in addition to being happy for his moirail, he was relieved to have at least one of his worries off of his plate.

"Cronus, I finally did it!" Rufioh had exclaimed as he burst into Cronus' hive just after sundown a few weeks after their return. Cronus had been asleep, but having dozed off in front of the television, he woke with a start when the wing stroll came in and started making a racket. It took Cronus a few moments to grasp what Rufioh was talking about, but once he was slightly more conscious he got a pretty good idea.

"I guess I probably shouldn't be so pumped about this, huh? I mean, I did just dump someone, after all." Rufioh mumbled sheepishly, taking a seat on the couch as Cronus had partially fallen off in his alarm. "But I am pretty relieved. I mean, it's a huge weight off of my mind. And I never even thought I'd be able to do this. Break up with someone the normal way, I mean." Rufioh yammered on, seemingly oblivious to the state that Cronus was in.

"Wvell, I'm proud of you." Cronus said, fighting to bring some strength into his voice and focus on the good news. Things seemed to finally be falling into place for both of them. Not everything, but enough.

"Hey... Are you okay? You seem a little..." Rufioh seemed to come down from his euphoric state a little, looking at Cronus with a touch of concern.

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm really, really good." Cronus said with more conviction this time. This seemed to satisfy Rufioh, who immediately relaxed back into his prior euphoric state.

"Good, that's great! Things are finally looking up for us, huh?" Rufioh said, taking a seat next to Cronus and casually throwing an arm over his shoulder. "I was so worried that thing were just gonna get even more messed up for both of us when we came back."

"Y-yeah. I guess so." Cronus still couldn't shake the feeling that something was off between him and Kankri still, but he didn't want to spoil Rufioh's good mood, so he kept his mouth shut.

"I mean..." Cronus sighed, not sure weather he should bring his issues up. But hadn't Rufioh's reluctance to talk to him been what caused the trouble in the first place? Cronus had been so upset when Rufioh left, and he didn't want to go down that road again. "I dunno, thing are still a little wvierd wvith Kan. But I think they're getting better. I don't knowv, it hasn't been long enough for me to be able to tell for sure, I guess."

"That sucks, but he probably just needs time, right? Time for things to go back to normal between you guys. I mean, we were gone for kind of a while. I still feel bad about keeping you away for so long." Rufioh said, sounding apologetic and a little sheepish. Cronus sighed, giving him an understanding if not slightly worn smile.

"No wvorries, really." Cronus said, offering Rufioh a smile to show that he was sincere. "I don't knowv, a part of me things that I should have left, but then I wvonder if maybe thing wvould havwe just gotten wvorse if I had stayed. I mean, things wveren't so bad betwveeen us, but it wvas our first real fight." He said. "Guess there's no point is wvorrying about the wvay that I handled it nowv though."

"Well, good then. I mean, I didn't want to feel like I was keeping you away." Rufioh said again. "I'm sure you guys just need time for things to go back to normal." It wasn't the most reassuring thing he could be told, be Cronus knew that Rufioh meant well, and that made him feel a little better about the whole thing. At least he had someone who he knew would be in his corner no matter what.

When Cronus left Rufioh's hive later that evening, he felt better about a lot of things. His moirial seemed to be doing alright, even better than usual, still riding his relief at finally ending his relationship with Horuss had been officially terminated, and as usual, Cronus found his good mood and general enthusiasm somewhat contagious.

Cronus had intended to just go home, but on his way he decided to go see Kankri instead. He figured that they just needed to get back into the rhythm of things, and he had misses Kankri a lot anyways. It almost seemed harder to be away from him now, though they were no longer physically separated by any great distance.

Kankri was at home and not busy when Cronus stopped by, and he seemed genuinely glad to see the seadweller, greeting him with a quick kiss and ushering him inside. He seemed a little distracted, but not upset, which was a relief. But Cronus wanted to get to the root of whatever was obviously bothering his matesprit. He knew there was probably some wisdom in what Rufioh said about giving things time to go back to normal, but at this point, Cronus wasn't sure if that could really happen on it's own. And it didn't feel right just to do _nothing._

"Hey Kan." Cronus greeted his matesprit somewhat cautiously, still a little unsure how to treat his matesprit since their reunion. They were back together, but something was definitely off, and no matter how much Cronus might have wanted to, it didn't feel quite right to just pick up where they left off. He wished they could though. What he wanted most right now was just to get some sort of normalcy.

"Cronus! Come in." Kankri said warmly, ushering the seadweller inside, taking a seat on the couch and giving Cronus a warm smile as he joined him. Everything seemed okay, for now at least, and Cronus was relieved, but he still worried. He was debating weather to say something when Kankri spoke.

"Actually, I'm really glad you came to see me today. I had been meaning to pay you a visit. There are some things I wanted to talk to you about since you got back. And it seems like maybe something's still bothering you, too." Kankri said. Cronus was relieved that he had brought this up, but at the same time, Kankri had picked up on more than Cronus had hoped he would. But the fact that they both wanted to talk seemed like a good sign.

"So... wvhats up then? Wvhat did you wvant to talk to me about?" Cronus asked, as he was not sure yet how to articulate his own worries.

"Not a lot, I just... There are a lot of important thing in a flushed relationship-no, in an relationship, really- that I think we've done poorly with as of late. This is no ways me attempting to point fingers or place the blame on you, I think it's just an issue of being apart so long. But honestly, there I things that I no longer feel... comfortable discussing with you." Kankri said, his face turning a little red towards the end of his explanation. Cronus frowned, mystified as to what Kankri meant.

"Uh, look, I'm not really sure wvhat you're trying to tell me. I mean, wvhat do you... wvant to do about this? I get that thing hawve been wvierd betwveen us, but honestly, I don't get wvhat you're asking me to do about it." Cronus said. He felt bad, like there was something really obvious that he wasn't picking up on. He hoped that was just his own ridiculous fears getting in the way; if there really was something, his not being able to tell would certainly not help his situation with Kankri.

"I'm not asking you to do anything about it. Just bear with me." Kankri said, sounding a little frustrated. Cronus sighed, wrapping his arms around his matesprit and burying his face in his hair. He didn't know what was wrong, with Kankri or even with himself, really, but this time he could at least stick around to figure it out. Running away hadn't done anything for him, so this time he would tough it out.

"I can do that, Kan." Cronus said, though he did think that is was odd that Kankri wasn't being more articulate about his worries. Usually he didn't hesitate to speak up about this sort of thing. Still, he didn't expect anything to go back to normal right away. This had come a little later than he had anticipated, but Cronus wasn't really surprised.

"Thank you." Kankri muttered softly, not really sounding as though he felt any better about the situation. The smaller troll sighed, nestling in closer to is matesprit, and Cronus absently wrapped an arm around him, lost in thought. Things were still a little off, but this was a start. Nothing had really changed, but Cronus still felt a little better about the situation. At least he had some small insight into whatever it was that was going through Kankri's head. "I think I just need some time to re-adjust to you being back... To us being back together. And there are some things that I want to change. I didn't know exactly what I wanted when you left, or even when you came back, but I think I do now."

Cronus had thought that he and Kankri were finally on the same page, but his matesprit's last comment left him mystified all over again. He frowned at Kankri, his expression making his confusion evident. He exacted Kankri to say something more, but instead he leaned in and kissed Cronus. The seadweller was caught off guard, and for once he hesitated, even as his matesprit pulled him closer, twining one hand though his hand and wrapping the other firmly around the base of his horn.

Kankri's kisses became faster and more frantic, his warm, small hands roaming all over Cronus' body. This being the complete reverse of what Cronus had expected, it took him a few minutes to process the fact that this was really happening, and for those few moments he just sat there dumbly. Once he snapped out of it Cronus' first instinct was to respond with enthusiasm. He buried one hand in Kankri's hair, letting the other move at first to the small of his back, and then lower. Kankri rolled his hips towards Cronus, his hands tugging at the hem of his shirt. The seadweller allowed him to remove it. A part of him worried about the fact that the way this was going seemed to be the exact reverse of what Kankri had told him he wanted pretty much constantly since Cronus had returned, but then he felt Kankri press a hand against his bulge as he began nipping and sucking at his neck around his gills, and all his worries- and the ability to think coherently at all, really- abandoned him.

* * *

AN: So, I know I keep making you guys promises about when I'll update and not being able to keep them for various reasons, so here's the deal: I'll update when I update. I'm going to school full time right now, and have kind of a lot going on in my life besides. I thought I could stick to a weekly update, but realistically, that's just not going to happen. So sometimes it might be a week or two between chapters, whereas others it will only be a few days. Sorry about making you guys a promise I was ultimately unable to keep; I really thought I could do this :/


	18. Consummation

Cronus wasn't sure how to react to this turn of events. This was pretty much the complete opposite of what he had expected, but, true to form, his body ended up acting before his mind had the chance to catch up. He ran his hands down Kankri's side, tugging at the hem of his sweater and disentangling himself from his matesprit so he could remove it. The moment he'd gotten the bulky sweater off of the smaller troll Kankri pulled him in again, his kisses fierce and determined in a surprising but not at all unwanted manner. Then again, Cronus had never known Kankri to do anything halfheartedly. It just came as a bit of a surprise that it applied to the physical side of their relationship as well.

As usual, Cronus' hands reacted before his mind could catch up. He moved his hands to the hem of the high-waisted pants that Kankri always wore, finally experienced enough to be able to get the button undone and the fly done without much trouble. He started to tug them off, but Kankri batted Cronus' hands away, yanking them off himself.

"Calm down cheif, I'm not going any wvhere." Cronus chuckled, though in reality he was perfectly satisfied with the pace at which things were moving forward. But this statement seemed to bring Kankri back to reality for a moment, and he pulled back from the seadweller, a frown fixed on his face.

"Hey, you alright, Kan?" Cronus asked, genuinely concerned now. He placed his hands firmly on his matesprit's forearms, holding Kankri back from him a little.

"I'm completely fine." Kankri said, sounding brusque and a little prideful and turning up his nose a little, but only in his usual manner. This was all the assurance that Cronus needed that this was in fact the same Kankri he knew and loved. Cronus pulled him back in, eliciting a startled squeak from the smaller troll.

At this point Cronus found himself hesitating again, but not for long as Kankri pressed his lips to his throat, nipping at the sensitive areas around his gills and rubbing at the base of each of his horns.

"Kan-" Cronus bit his lip, not sure if he really wanted to say the words that were on the tip of his tongue. Because as much as he wanted this, Cronus wasn't sure that moving things forwards physically was the best idea considering everything that had happened between him and Kankri as of late. But looking at him matesprit now, he seemed to sure that this was really what he wanted. He'd known right from the start that pailing wasn't going to be a part of his relationship with Kankri, and as much as he wanted it, it felt almost wrong to be doing this now. Something was still off with Kankri.

"Cronus, are _you _alright?"

"I'm perfect, chief." Cronus said kissing Kankri lightly on the lips and attempting to shrug it off completely. He desperately wanted the words to be true; he told himself he just wasn't trying hard enough.

"If you say so." Kankri responded not sounding completely satisfied with Cronus' half-hearted answer. Cronus sighed, wishing he could just will himself out of the funk that he and Kankri seemed to be in. Kankri kissed him back after a moment's hesitation, and this time Cronus decided to just let himself go with it.

Kankri's hesitation didn't last though, and soon Cronus felt his matesprit's warm hands sliding under his shit and then up his chest until the seadweller raised his arms and allowed him to remove the garment. Immediately after this Kankri reached down to remove his own baggy sweater, but Cronus reached out and stopped him.

"Come on Kan, you don't havwe to do all the wvork." Cronus teased, pulling the sweater off of the smaller troll before rolling his hips towards him. Kankri responded with a breathy moan.

"Cronus-" Kankri moaned again, throwing his head back. "Could we perhaps... move this along a little?"

"Wvell you 't havwe to ask me twvice." Cronus chuckled, running a hand up the inside of Kankri's thigh, guiding his legs open and repositioning himself between them before grinding up against Kankri again.

"Kan..." Cronus sighed, his doubts coming to the front of his mind again. But Kankri seemed to be the one taking charge here so... That must mean that this was really what he wanted, right? Cronus told himself to let it go once and for all.

"Yes Cronus?" Kankri said, the concern in his expression and tone making it evident that he had picked up on Cronus' hesitation.

"Nothing." Cronus said, moving his hands back up to Kankri's waist to undo the button of his pants and un-tuck his shirt, pulling it off in the same motion. After this he allowed his hands to roam over Kankri's bare skin, before bringing one to rest on his hip, running the other through the smaller troll's hair, rubbing gently at the base of one horn. At this, Kankri practically melted into him, grinding his hips against Cronus'.

Cronus' bulge was already completely unsheated by the time Kankri pressed a hand against it through his jeans. A moan that was partially from arousal and partially from frustration escaped Cronus' lips. Kankri sighed before giving Cronus a half smile that was bordering on smirk and undid his fly, yanking the seadweller's pants down slightly so they were out of the way.

Kankri wasn't hesitating this time. He pushed two fingers into Cronus' nook, wrapping the others around his bulge. Cronus arched his back, a high-pitched moan escaping his lips.

"Kan, please," Cronus moaned in a half-whisper. He didn't even know what he was asking, really. He knew it probably couldn't go any further than this, in fact, he wasn't even sure that he wanted to, but he was too lost in the sensation to think clearly.

"Cronus..." Kankri gave the seadweller a calculating look, a hint of a smile touching the corners of his mouth. After another moment he drew close to Cronus, removing his hand from Cronus' nook and bulge, leaning back slightly and removing his own pants and briefs. Cronus stared down at the candy red nook and bulge that were both dripping, still unable to completely grasp what was happening.

After a moment, Cronus made himself snap out of it though. This was really happening. And this was what he wanted. Just being emotionally close to Kankri was great, of course, and when it came to the more physical side of things it was as though Cronus really knew what he was missing anyways. But every time the two went further, he got a little more of an idea. And though he told himself that he didn't care about the physical side of the relationship, and he had been committed to making that true, the more of an idea of what it would be like, the harder it got to deny.

"You sure you wvanna do this, Kan?" Cronus asked, not bothering to hide his concern, even if Kankri probably wouldn't be able to recognize the reason for it.

"Positive" Kankri said, giving him a hard look at first before relaxing, his expression breaking into a soft yet obviously nervous smile.

Cronus took a deep breath, drawing himself closer to Kankri and guiding his legs a little further apart, moving closer to Kankri until his bulge came into contact with the warm, dripping outer folds of Kankri's nook. As this happened most of his anxiousness left him, impulse and instinct kicking in. He rolled hips swiftly forward until they came into contact with the back of Kankri's thighs. Kankri winced as he did so, whimpering slightly.

"Sorry Kan, I'll go slower!" Cronus said, pulling out completely and waiting a moment before pushing into Kankri's nook again, making sure to go slowly this time. Once he had pushed all the way in he waited, his eyes intently focused on Kankri's face, waiting for him to give the okay to start moving again.

"You can keep going." Kankri half-whispered after a few moments. Cronus nodded, pulling back until his bulge was almost completely out of Kankri's nook and then thrusting back in.

After a few more whines from Kankri, each followed by a hastily muttered apology from Cronus, he started to get the hang of this. Cronus' movements gradually became shorter and faster, which seemed to be the ticket for Kankri. He began to moan softly, both hands gripping tightly at Cronus' forearms. Encouraged at what seemed like a positive reaction, Cronus kept going, making his thrusts little faster each time. It felt completely amazing, and Cronus could feel himself growing close to releasing.

Not long after this Kankri let out a high, loud moan that he cut off halfway, and Cronus pulled out a little as Kankri's release of genetic material leaked out, dripping down both trolls' thighs and staining Cronus' sheets a bright red. Cronus could feel himself getting close too, so he kept going until his violet genetic material joined the crimson that had already soaked his sheets.

Rolling off of Kankri, Cronus lay down and pulled him close, burying his face in his matesprit's hair. The two trolls lay entwined that way for a while and Cronus had been on the verge of drifting off to sleep when Kankri spoke again.

"What did you and Rufioh do while you were... away? The two of you were together, correct?" The question caught Cronus off guard, and he pulled back slightly, fixing a baffled stare at Kankri.

"I don't knowv... Not all that much, really. I mean, wve wvould just do the same things wve did back home, really. Lots of music. And he tried to teach me fiduspawn, but I nevwer really understood it. Not really my thing, anwvays. Wvhy do you ask?" Cronus asked, genuinely curious as to what had brought this on.

"I was just curious, really. Even when we played SGRUB, I never traveled very far. I figured it must be pretty different out there, alone. Though I guess you weren't alone." Kankri said, and for once the vocally expressive troll's voice betrayed no hint of what might be going on in his head.

"That's right. I guess if you wvant to knowv about it I can tell you more sometime. But I mostly thought it wvas pretty boring out there." Cronus said, hoping that Kankri wold leave it at. He never quite knew how to act when Kankri brought up his time away. He still felt bad for having cut and run when he and Kankri had started having problems. And that train of thought reminded Cronus that the issues that he and Kankri had had never really been resolved. Sure, Kankri wasn't so angry and sharp with Cronus anymore, and Cronus didn't feel guilty and like he wanted to run away from his relationship, but that was really just a product of his having left. He and Kankri hadn't talked about, so they hadn't ever really resolved anything.

"I see." Kankri sat in silence for a moment before turning to Cronus, giving him a quick peck on the cheek, and getting up, collecting his scattered clothing and dressing himself.

"You don't havwe to go." Cronus said as Kankri headed for the door, trying his best not to sound like he was whining. He knew that Kankri probably had other things to do.

"Welll..." Kankri glanced back and Cronus and the bed that he had just vacated, before letting out a sigh and breaking into a soft smile. "I guess it wouldn't hurt to stay here a little while lounger." He said, returning to the bed and easily nestling back into Cronus' arms.

"Just a little while longer..."

* * *

AN: So yeah, this chapter took me a whole month to write! Unlike with my other breaks, where life has gotten in the way, in this case I'm just _really _bad at writing smut. Anyways, apologies for the long break in updates. I was also hoping I could come up with a better chapter title, but had no such luck. But yeah, hope you liked it!


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Homestuck, Friendship, Romance