Naruto 1. Treefall

"Shit, give me a second! You are giving me ideas!" Three girls sat outside on a playset, one pulling out her laptop.

"But what would happen if it was true?!" One of the other girls spoke, looking up into the trees. "Just think, falling blondes. Thunk!" She pointed to the ground, laughing at a thought.

"Yes! Just look up and grin, Birdy." One of them looked up while the other laughed.

"True. Just drag him to the trampoline, and you will help me, Dani." It went silent, and they all froze. There were voices coming from somewhere.

"_Shut the fuck up! I think they heard you, you fucking idiot!_"

"_No they didn't, yeah! It was you they heard, yeah!"_ The three girls looked up to spot two figures in the tree.

"Sam... what the hell-"

THUNK

All their stares followed the blonde on his fall to the ground. The music on a phone continued playing 'Raining Men'. Not a word was heard, except a whisper of "_Fuck_". Dani went to the ground and stared at him for a second, then grabbed a stick and poked the blonde.

"I think he's still alive guys!"

"Well no shit! He's a ninja!" Sam and Birdy climbed down and stood next to Dani.

"Well, what should we do? Drag him to the trampoline?" They stared at each other and looked at the blonde.

"ZOE! Get your ass out here!" Sam yelled for the stupid blonde.

"What the hell you guys want- shit." The door opened and Zoe stared at the blonde on the ground.

"Stop staring and help you idiot! Get the damn duct tape!" Zoe ran inside and came out with silver tape.

"What do you want me to do with it?!"

"You don't want him to make us fly into space don't you?! Tape his hands!" Zoe ran over and picked up one of the man's hands.

"Uh..."

"Just give it!" Sam took the tape out of her hands and taped the man's hands, then stood up. "Each one of us grabs a limb, okay?" They just stared for a second and carefully grabbed a limb, dragging him to the edge of the trampoline.

"Birdy! Get the rope!" Dani yelled at the tallest of the girls.

"Meh. Right." Birdy ran inside, leaving the other girls to pull the blonde onto the trampoline. She came back out with the rope after they put the blonde on the trampoline.

"Bitch, we need to tie him down!" They tied his hands and legs to the poles on the trampoline which held the safety net. They all sat around the edge of the trampoline after they completely tied him down. It was almost completely silent except for the string of curses coming from the tree. Sam jumped off and snagged a hammer.

"We need weapons! Grab what you can!" They all scattered and came back a few minutes later with stuff. Sam held a hammer and a flashlight. Zoe held a broken branch. Dani held a knife from the kitchen... a few of them. Birdy held a water gun and a soda. They all just sat still, not a sound was heard from them. It wasn't long before the man mumbled and twitched. The girls tensed up except Birdy, who sat there drinking her soda. Sam pointed the flashlight at the man's face.

"Ack! Shit, bright, yeah!" The man started to move, and the first to react was Birdy, who pulled the trigger on the water gun. "Stop moving and shut up."

"You shut up!" Dani hit Birdy with the blunt end of a knife.

"Stop it you idiots!" Sam yelled at the two who were fighting then set her attention to the annoyed man. "Why the fuck are you here?!"

"I'd rather not say, yeah." Sam held the hammer in front of his face.

"I will hit you upside the head with this if you don't answer me. I shall ask again, why the fuck are you here?!" The man's eyes widened.

"I... I can't, yeah."

"Tell us or you will soon find that these knives will be impaled in your body." Dani grabbed her sharpest knives.

"Look, yeah! I don't know why I'm here, nor who you guys are, yeah!" He started to struggle again. Birdy shot the water gun again. "Why the hell do you keep shooting me with that, yeah!?" Dani glared at Birdy.

"What? He was moving!" Birdy complained while Dani just sighed.

"Can I just leave now, yeah? Some one untie me, yeah!" The girls stared at each other.

"Nah. This is fun." Zoe smiled, holding the branch in her hand. The man just sighed.

"Great, yeah." The other man in the tree was silent, but in his head, he was cracking up and yelling curses. It was going to be a long night.


	2. Fight

"Can't you just take the tape off of my hands, yeah?" The man was still tied up to the trampoline, frowning at the fact that four girls, who don't even have chakra, tied him up like this.

"No. Shut up. We need to think." The girls surrounded each other in a circle and whispered to each other. Soon, Sam spoke again. "Birdy."

"Meh."

"Go get the other one down." Birdy immediately knew what she meant and jumped off the trampoline. She snagged the largest rock she could find and looked at the tree of which the blonde man fell out of. She spotted a shadowy figure in the tree and took aim. The man stared at her, wondering what she was doing, and realized it too late.

"Shit!" He saw the rock zoom towards him and it hit him in the chest, sending him falling to the ground. He laid on the ground, letting the pain ebb away. Birdy strode up and looked at him. She then reached down and grabbed the scythe that fell with him, and walked back towards the trampoline, the blonde man staring in surprise.

"Birdy, put the scythe down. I don't want to clean up and blood." Sam stared at her, then sighed as she sat on the edge and held onto the weapon.

"Fuck." The man slowly stood up, Sam shining the flashlight onto him. "Turn that fucking light off."

"Hidan, come untie me and get rid of these girls, or Leader-sama will be pissed that you left me behind, yeah!" The blonde man struggled a bit as he yelled at the silver haired man.

"It was your fucking fault that you didn't fucking stop talking, Deidara!"

"Well you hit me upside the head with your scythe, yeah!"

"Just to fucking shut you fucking up!"

"Will you two stop whining like a bunch of little girls and shut the fuck up!?" Sam yelled at the two men, who stopped talking and glared at each other. "Better." Hidan looked over at Birdy, who was holding his scythe.

"Give me my fucking scythe."

"No."

"Do you want to be fucking dead, because I fucking kill without mercy."

"I can do the same, and if you come even close to me, your head will be mounted on a fucking wall and your fucking body will be impaled with so many fucking knives that it will become a fucking coat rack." Birdy glared at Hidan, who didn't even dare to move.

"I'd like to fucking see you fucking try." Those eight words made her temper rise dramatically. Sam, Dani, and Zoe went 'Oh shit'. Deidara didn't feel very comfortable at the moment, because he didn't know what was going to happen. All he knew was that the other three girls ran and hid behind him. Birdy stood up and took a few deep breaths. Hidan noticed the other girls hiding behind Deidara, then looked at Birdy. She glanced up and he saw pure anger and hate in her eyes, then he slid one foot back. Birdy charged forward, then swung the scythe at Hidan, who side-stepped and missed the blade by an inch. She then changed the scythe's direction while passing Hidan and it scraped his chest, leaving a large scratch running from his right shoulder to his left side.

"Fuck!" Hidan winced at the sudden pain but Birdy swung at him again. He was ready this time and caught the handle of the scythe right before the blade touched his neck. His other hand caught Birdy's wrist and she just stood there, glaring at Hidan.

"Let me go."

"Not unless you fucking give me my fucking scythe."

"Never."

"Then I'll just fucking take it from you." Hidan jerked the scythe out of her grip and quickly shifted it in his hands, positioning the blade against her neck. The thoughts in Sam's, Dani's, and Zoe's minds changed to 'Oh hell no'. Dani quickly grabbed a knife and flung it at Hidan as hard as she could. Just as it impaled his back, she flung a few more with the help of Sam. Zoe just sat there, hiding. Hidan spun around to them and Birdy was able to walk back, away from the scythe that was against her neck a few moments ago. Zoe was cracking up.

"You guys are backstabbers!" All she got was a glare from Sam and Dani.

"Screw you dipshit! Go die in a Jashin dammed hole!" Dani yelled at Hidan, who was about to throw his scythe at her, but then felt a knife from his back being pulled out and placed against his neck.

"If I were you, I wouldn't move."

"Fuck you bitch."

"Why thank you. I take that as a complement."

"You're fucking dead."

"No, I'd rather not be. How about this, we call a truce and when I remove the knife, we don't kill each other. Got it?" Birdy quickly walked back right when the door opened.

"Whoa, shit. What the hell is going on?!" A girl looked around the area.

"Kaisha! Get your ass over here!" Sam yelled and she immediately ran to the trampoline.

"Why is there someone tied to the trampoline?"

"Don't worry about it. Just be happy there isn't any dead bodies."


	3. Calm Night

Throughout the night, things have calmed down a bit. Deidara was untied, and the girls relaxed. Hidan and Birdy kept shooting glares at each other as they all had a 'group chat'.

"Alright. Do any of you two know why you're here?" Sam questioned the two ninja, one still having a glaring contest with Birdy. A thought popped in her head.

"Aww... You two look like a couple!" Almost immediately, they broke their glares and scowled. Well... surprisingly, Hidan stayed calm.

"**SHUT UP! YOU FUCKING KNOW THAT YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD IF YOU FUCKING SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT EVER FUCKING AGAIN!**" Birdy literally exploded and the other girls cracked up laughing their asses off. Birdy then stormed off inside, hopefully to stab something and calm down. Sam was able to catch her breath, then looked at the hunched over laughing Deidara. Hidan was walking around the house to probably get away from the idiots around here.

"Everyone still alive?!" Zoe was the second to calm down. Deidara straightened out and was taking deep breaths. They looked at Dani still on the ground.

"Anyways, do you know why you're here?" Sam spoke, Deidara was silent for a second then sighed.

"We were sent to look for recruits, and we stopped every so often, like here, yeah."

"Alright, so why haven't you left yet?"

"I was thinking that you girls were strong enough, since you guys kinda took us down in a way, yeah." This spawned a thought in all the girls minds who heard this. "Now excuse me as I shall stop Hidan from killing anything here, yeah." Deidara walked off to where Hidan disappeared. The girls stayed silent for a second until they burst out in silent screams. Birdy came back out, still pissed off, but was a lot calmer than before.

"Meh. What the hell happened?" She looked at the silent screaming girls, sighing. Dani was the first to zen.

"DEIDARA SAID THAT WE MIGHT GO BACK WITH HIM TO JOIN THE AKATSUKI!"

"Meh. Alright. So?"

"So?! We get to join the Akatsuki, bitch!"

"And I don't care. It's not that important." Dani just gaped at Birdy, who looked at the sky in boredom. It wasn't long before Deidara came back dragging Hidan behind him. It looked strange seeing the 5'5'' blonde dragging his 5'10'' friend behind him, because of their height difference. Birdy seemed to have calmed down a lot, because she just ignored the fact that Hidan was there.

"Damn bipolar bear." Sam muttered to herself, noticing that Birdy was absolutely calm.

"Anyways, yeah. We won't be able to return back until Sunday, so we'll need to stay a bit, yeah..."

"Wait, wait. I'm not sure mom will let you. She doesn't even know you guys."

"Then we'll just stay out here, yeah." Hidan started to protest, but was stopped by Deidara. "Where will we stay, yeah?"

"I don't know. Find a place and make yourselves comfortable I guess." Deidara nodded and looked around. He sighed and strode over to the playset, taking a seat on the lower fencing, which had a little space big enough for a person to lay in it.

"Warning, there's spiders under there." Zoe spoke, and Deidara immediately stood up, frowning.

"There's the park down the street. That might be a good place for you guys." Kaisha pointed towards the general direction of the park. Both ninja started for the park.

"Wait! Don't let anyone see you guys!" Sam yelled out, and both ninja nodded then disappeared out of sight. "What the hell are we going to do now?!"

"Meh." Birdy crossed her arms and frowned.

"Un." Sam replied back, like this had happened before.

"Fuck."

"Un."

"Shit"

"That's enough. I'm going to bed." Sam walked inside, everyone else following her. She flopped down on the couch with Kaisha and Zoe doing the same and grabbing a blanket. Dani and Birdy went upstairs and laid down there. Birdy snagged her computer and Dani had her tablet.

"Holy shit! Cool!" Birdy soon started typing like crazy and grinned psychotically.

"What happened." Dani looked up from her tablet.

"Nothing. This shit won't fucking work... Damn computer." Birdy shut down the laptop and leaned back, closing her eyes in deep thought. Dani went back to her tablet. Birdy mumbled to herself.

"Falling blondes... Ha. Never thought this shit would come true..."


	4. Explanation

It was about eight in the morning, and only two of the five girls were awake. Dani and Birdy already attacked their electronics and now were sitting at the table in the kitchen.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Dani was trying to look over at Birdy's laptop, but wasn't able to see.

"Just give me a second... YES!" Birdy laughed triumph and turned her laptop for Dani to see. She almost collapsed in laughter when she saw the mini Deidara crawling across the screen. (which I now have five on my screen at the moment while im typing this.)

"Take it off! We don't want him to see!" Birdy quickly took off the mini Dei and looked out the giant window behind them. Thankfully, Deidara wasn't there.

"What are you two idiots doing?..." Sam walked in, and pulled out two toaster waffles, then plopped them in the toaster.

"Come take a look!" Birdy placed another Dei on the screen and tossed him around. Sam, on the other hand, face-palmed and laughed.

"Turn that off you idiot." Birdy did so and looked over at the toaster waffles Sam was pulling out.

"Aww... I thought there were going to be toasted human hands..." All three of the girls cracked up, then jumped when they heard a thump against the window. Hidan was rapping his knuckles against the window, to get their attention. He then pointed for them to come outside.

"The fuck you want?" Birdy was the first to come out, the other girls following her except Zoe and Kaisha, who were still asleep.

"Blondie needed to fucking talk to all of you, but two of you seem to still be fucking asleep." Birdy sighed and went back inside, only to come out with a sleepy Kaisha and Zoe following behind.

"Better?"

"Hes out front." Hidan led them through the gate out front, where Deidara was leaning against a tree. He looked up, noticing the others' presence.

"Hidan, you may go now, yeah." Hidan sighed and walked of towards the park.

"So, what?" All the girls took a seat in the grass, knowing it was going to be a while.

"We won't be able to leave until Wednesday, for certain reasons, yeah."

"Why?" Kaisha was wide awake now, same as Zoe.

"It's complicated, yeah. Anyways, since you girls are going to be coming with us, we should talk about some things, yeah. Number one, we need to work out about your chakra and skills, yeah."

"But we don't have any-"

"Shut up, ass-flavored lollipop!" Sam yelled at Zoe, who shut up and stayed silent, surprisingly. Deidara seemed a tad curious about why they called her that, as it reminded him of someone.

"Why do you guys call her that, yeah?" The girls froze for a second.

"It... It's a tad complicated..." Dani was the only one to speak.

"Well then, I can take complicated, yeah. So, who will be the first to speak, yeah?" He glanced around, looking at each of the frozen girls.

"I guess I'll speak then." Sam sighed and thought for a second. "Well, your guys' world is basically known here as an anime, or cartoon. We don't know who knew about you guys in the first place or how they knew about your world, but many people watch the anime and know about you guys. Including us five." Sam let that sink in, allowing Deidara to comprehend what she said.

"So... you guys know pretty much everything about us... yeah."

"Pretty much. Most people go for the good guys and such, because in the anime, all you guys die... but we prefer to go for the Akatsuki and such. You guys are awesome, and you can call us obsessed with your guys' organization."

"Like how obsessed, yeah?"

"Well, we have nicknames for each of us... due to how our personalities are alike you guys."

"Okay... who's who, yeah?"

"Well, I-"

"I'll tell him." Birdy took over, making Sam frown when she noticed that she was being interrupted. "Sam is the pyro of our group, so she's called Dei-chan, after you, since you're a pyro too. Zoe is very much like tobi, so we call her Tobi-chan. We call Dani 'Sori-chan' because we thought she was like Sasori, but she is nothing like him at times. She doesn't want to change her nickname so we still call her Sori-chan." Deidara seemed to be trying to hold back a laugh at the moment. "I am the psycho of the group, and I prefer to be called psychotically insane, but I'm called Hidana-chan after 'him'." Birdy frowned when she mentioned Hidan, but continued. "Kaisha is the most recent addition to the group, and we are still trying to find a personality she fits." Deidara, at the moment, was resting his head in one of his hands, trying not to laugh out loud. The girls, except Birdy, were doing the same. Deidara spoke again when he was finally able to catch his breath.

"Alright, guess that explains a lot, yeah. That means most of what I needed to tell you guys can be skipped and we can get onto the more important stuff, yeah."

"Which is...?" The girls sat impatiently, wondering what to do next.

"I'm not sure how this will work, but we will have to figure out how to place you guys in teams, yeah. We could make groups of three, maybe four, or rearrange the groups out so that one member will be paired up with one of you guys, yeah."

"How fucking fun." Hidan was back from his walk. "Hopefully she doesn't get paired up with Kakuzu and I, or she might just be dead." Birdy glared at Hidan and walked inside, leaving the other girls to choose whether to follow her in, or go to the backyard. One thought filled Deidara's mind.

'_This is not going to work out, yeah._'


	5. Loopy

All five girls plus Deidara and Hidan sat around the backyard, mainly at the bench which sat around the corner of the house. There wasn't enough room for the two Akatsuki to sit, so Deidara grabbed the wooden stool and Hidan just leaned against the house. All they did was talk and such, until someone called out from inside.

"Pancakes are done!" This made a few of the girls freeze, while Zoe and Kaisha ran inside.

"You guys stay out here, and don't say a word!" Sam spoke, then ran inside with Birdy and Dani, only for them all to come out five minutes later with pancakes. Sam handed one to Deidara and one to Hidan.

"Holy shit! These things are fucking huge!"

"Damn, they're about the size of your head, yeah!"

"Both of you shut up and eat." Sam took a seat, watching both of the Akatsuki stare at their pancakes, amazed by the size.

"Where's the fucking syrup?" Sam sighed at what Hidan said.

"You don't need any. Trust me. These things are sugary enough already. Just think about giving one of these to Tobi with syrup." Deidara shivered at the thought, and the girls just grinned. "See? Now shut up and eat."

**TIME SKIP TO THE FUN PART!**

Dani, Birdy, Zoe, and Kaisha were up in the playset, messing around with stuff on their electronics. Dani was recording sounds and speeding them up and slowing them down, making everybody crack up at how it sounded. Sam was inside, probably asleep. The two Akatsuki were somewhere, but couldn't be found. It was around nine at night, and the girls up in the playset had blankets surrounding them. They suddenly froze, hearing the gate being shoved around. (the gate is hard to open. you need to shove it around because its heavy as shit!) The girls looked up to see a person walk through. None of them could see his face as he was turned around, closing the gate, but they could see his arms.

"Holy fucking shit! Fucking drop your fucking shit and run!" Dani yelled and ran to the door, Kaisha and Zoe following behind. Birdy was a bit loopy and stayed behind, still laying down with her head facing the fence. She looked back and slightly grinned in a creepy way, reaching her arms out towards the man.

"Birdy! Get over here!" Birdy ignored her and continued to grin, speaking in a soft voice to the strange man.

"Come here, I'm bored. I need a friend..." Birdy left her mouth open after she spoke, adding to the creepiness. The man looked up, and Birdy caught a clear view of his eyes, which seemed to slightly glow in the darkness. The only thing was, she didn't seem to care and stared at his demonic looking eyes while he walked past and ignored her. When he stepped into the light, the girls by the door moved back, closer to the trampoline. Birdy sat up and watched the man, still grinning creepily. He had stitches running across his face and his arms, and his eyes had a blood red color replacing the normally white part. He didn't seem to notice Birdy getting ready to pounce on him from the playset behind him.

It seemed to happen in a flash. Birdy jumped off the playset and landed square on the man's shoulders, causing him to loose his breath momentarily. Surprisingly, he could hold Birdy's weight, as she was only about two inches shorter than Hidan.

"Kuzu-kunnn~" Birdy was obviously loopy, as she would never act like this, unless she was hyper. She gripped on to Kakuzu's back, still grinning like a psycho. Thankfully, Hidan and Deidara came back from wherever they were, noticing that someone else with chakra was here.

"The fuck!?" Hidan instantly doubled over in laughter at the sight, while Deidara rushed over to stop Kakuzu from killing Birdy. ( poor me! ) He quickly detached her and pushed her aside, while Kakuzu only glared at her. Sam rushed out, hearing all the racket and laughter.

"What the hell is going on?!" She looked around and spotted the three girls laughing their asses of as well as Hidan, who was now on his knees. She looked over at Deidara leaning against the house, sighing, and saw Kakuzu glaring at a grinning Birdy.

"Sam! You won't believe what happened!" Kaisha was the first to catch her breath. She started to tell Sam what happened while Deidara was feeling a bit aggravated.

"Alright, you, go inside, yeah." Birdy quickly scampered off, still a bit hyper and loopy. "So, why are you here, Kakuzu, yeah?"

"Because Leader wanted me to keep an eye on that idiot over there." Deidara looked back at Hidan, who was trying to stand up now, and was slightly wobbly. He then nodded and walked over to the girls.

"Why don't you all go inside, because we need to talk out here, yeah." The girls disappeared inside, leaving the three Akatsuki outside.

"Alright, alright. So what the fuck do you want, Kakuzu?" Hidan regained his balance and wasn't happy, seeing that his teammate was here to ruin the fun for him.

"Leader said that something has come up, and he needs us back, now."


	6. Leaving

Deidara ran inside, not caring that if anyone who doesn't know that he's here saw him. Thankfully, Sam and Zoe's mother was asleep and Corby was in the garage. The baby Danny was asleep too and Kenzie was upstairs. Taylor, unfortunately, was playing on the Wii. All the girls were upstairs, and as soon as they heard the back door close, they looked over the railing to see who came in.

"Deidara? Why are you-"

"No time to explain, yeah! Get all your stuff together and we need to leave, now, yeah!" The girls scrambled everywhere for their belongings and five minutes later, they followed Deidara out back. The girls couldn't hold in their excitement and were panting a bit from the rush, not being able to stay still as they all were grinning and full of energy. Hidan was sitting on the edge of the trampoline, looking at his scythe in boredom, while Kakuzu was leaning against the fence waiting for Deidara. He looked up and glanced at each of the girls, sighing.

"Bout' fucking time. I fucking hate it here." Hidan stood up and followed everyone else out the gate and out into the middle of the street. (it's a dead end turnaround street so it's circular)

"Alright, I advise you guys to stay close together or you might get hurt or tossed somewhere else, yeah." The five of them immediately clumped together, holding hands so they wouldn't fly off somewhere. "Good, hold tight, yeah." Deidara placed a hand on Zoe's shoulder so that they could be transported too. With his other hand, he did a signal, and so did the other two Akatsuki. They instantly felt a nauseating feeling, like being pulled downwards through a leaf blower. It was a few seconds before they felt ground again, all landing on their asses except Deidara, Hidan, and Kakuzu, as they were experienced.

"Ow! Fuck!" Birdy was the first to stand up, looking around at the trees surrounding them. The others soon did the same, curious about where they were.

"You guys fucking coming, or what?!" Hidan yelled back at the amazed girls, who snapped back into reality (if you could call it that) and caught up to the Akatsuki. They stayed silent in complete shock while they walked to the hideout, which was only about five minutes away from the spot where they arrived at. It wasn't long before the forest ended at a rocky wasteland.

"You've got to be joking..." Sam sighed and looked at Deidara, who was glancing at the trees at the edge of the forest.

"Eheheh..." Deidara sighed and let his head droop down.

"The fuck Deidara!? You fucking brought us the wrong fucking way?!" Hidan yelled at the blonde, who started heading back the way they came. "You fucking-"

"Hidan, shut up." Kakuzu slapped his hand over Hidan's mouth, silencing him. "We've been moving the hideout around a lot, and you would have done the same thing." Kakuzu took lead this time, and hopefully went the right way this time. After only a few minutes, the girls felt like they were going to pass out.

"We're tired..."

"Shut the fuck up. We should almost be fucking there." Hidan, Kakuzu, and Deidara seemed to be fine, not affected at all from the walk. Suddenly, Birdy collapsed.

"Too tired... goodnight..." She mumbled under her breath, and conked out instantly. Everyone else just sighed.

"Hidan, you pick her up, yeah."

"WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO FUCKING PICK HER UP?!"

"Because she's bigger than I am, and I bet Kakuzu would not even lift a finger to help her, yeah."

"But-" Hidan stopped himself and sighed, then picked Birdy up. Throughout the walk, he mumbled to himself in anger, wanting the chance to drop her on her head and be done with it. It wasn't long before they finally reached the hideout, the moon high in the sky. The building seemed to be empty as they walked through it, silent, except for a pissed off, mumbling Hidan. At the other end of the hideout, there was a small hallway leading to five rooms, obviously for each of the girls.

"Alright, yeah. You-" Deidara pointed to Kaisha, "This is your room, yeah." He pointed to the leftmost room, then pointed to the one next to it. "Then your room, yeah." He pointed at Dani, "Then yours, and the rightmost one is yours, yeah." He pointed at Sam, then Zoe, then looked at Hidan. "Her room is this one, yeah." Hidan grumbled and strode into the room between Sam's and Zoe's room, then came back out without Birdy and walked to his room. Deidara winced when he heard the door slam and sighed, walking to his room

"You know, if this is going to work, Hidan needs to calm down." Deidara jumped at the sound of Konan's voice.

"Shit, you scared me, yeah. Why are you up, yeah?" Konan laughed.

"Hidan's door. He's not in a very good mood, is he?"

"Eh... one of them keeps pissing him off, yeah." Deidara pointed back towards the girl's rooms.

"I'll settle this out tomorrow, alright?" Konan waved at him before he closed is door, then continued to her room, hoping that this will all work out.


	7. Pranks

"Birdy. Birdy. Birdy. Birdy. Roberta! Get your ass up!"

"Nrrg... go the fuck away..."

"Only if you want me to dump a bucket of water on you!"

"Alright, alright! Shit, I'm up!" Birdy sat up in her bed, her hair a mess and frowning. She glared at Sam, who was laughing her ass off at Birdy.

"Get up, Dani wants to show you something."

"Meh..." Birdy slowly stood up, wincing at her side. "Owww... that fucking hurts..." Sam just laughed and walked out in front of Dani's room, where the other girls stood laughing.

"Dani, tell birdy!" Zoe was jumping up and down in an attempt to get rid of her excitement.

"What the fuck happened...?"

"Well... I just found that I had a package of TNT poppers left in my bag... and I want to see what Deidara would do with them..." Birdy cracked up.

"Here, just tape one to his door and see what will happen." She snagged a bag and ran off, only to come back empty handed a few seconds later. It has only been a day since they reached the hideout, and now it seemed like the girls had lived there for their entire lives. They knew every nook and cranny of the place and already made friends and enemies with the Akatsuki members. Of course, Hidan and Birdy try to avoid each other as much as possible, and like expected, Zoe and Tobi became idiotic friends. Deidara, obviously, didn't like it, as he now had to take care of two idiots. For now, they were paired up with already existing teams and only went on simple missions. In an effort to make the two get along, Konan paired Birdy up with Kakuzu and Hidan, which only led to Hidan being pissed off for a few hours. Sam and Zoe were paired up with Deidara when he was sent on missions without Sasori. Kaisha and Dani were paired up with Kisame and Itachi, but only one of them at a time were sent on missions with the two Akatsuki.

"Give me another, I have an idea." Birdy took the bag that Dani handed to her, then scampered off down the hallway. When she came back, she grinned at the fact that the bag on Deidara's door was gone.

"What did you do?" Sam stared at Birdy, trying to get the psycho to speak.

"Put one on Hidan's door."

"Why?!"

"Because I'm bored. I want to see what will happen!" Sam just facepalmed.

"You are an idiot."

"Nah, the world just hates me, because I'm too evil for it."

"Alright, I have two more bags, plus a whole other box with four more packs." Dani opened a pack and grinned. "Who's ready to prank?"

"Fuck yeah!" Birdy snagged a few and popped one in her fingers, just for the heck of it.

**TIMESKIP**

The girls surrounded their prey, Birdy with the popper in hand. The victim was the silver haired masochist, who was sleeping on the couch as he did frequently after lunch. The girls were tense, as he could slash out at a moment's notice. Birdy reached her arm out and...

SNAP

The popper snapped and created a small spark with a loud sound, loud enough to make Hidan jump and yell.

"THE FUCK WAS THAT?!" The girls instantly ran into the hallway, out of Hidan's sight. Birdy winced as she thought about the sound, remembering when Sam snapped one right next to her ear. Her ears rang for about a good five minutes.

"Gah! Fuck..." Hidan winced and tapped his ear, hearing it ring. "Little fuckers made me fucking deaf in this ear..." He sat down, waiting for the ringing to stop so he could kill whoever did this.

"Alright, who's next?" Zoe whispered, looking around.

"I have an idea..." Dani glanced over at Kakuzu's open door. "But it's a suicidal prank." The other girls followed her gaze and shuddered. They knew not to disturb Kakuzu when he was counting money.

"Forget it. I say we go after Tobi instead." Birdy looked back, seeing the idiot in his room with his door open.

"Alright, let's go." Kaisha snagged a popper and ran over to the open door. She looked in and knocked on the wall.

"Kaisha-chan! You want to play a game with Tobi?!" The hyper idiot Tobi dashed over to Kaisha, speaking in his normal third-person view.

"In fact, yes! Catch!" Kaisha threw the popper into the hole in Tobi's mask, which immediately popped and made him jump. He dashed to the nearby Deidara, who was wondering what had just happened.

"Deidara-sempai! Kaisha-chan threw something into Tobi's mask and it exploded! It hurt Tobi!"

"You'll be fine, yeah." Deidara shoved Tobi off and stared at him, snagging something out of his pocket. He threw it at Tobi and it fell into the hole of his mask, popping like what Kaisha threw at him.

"Gah!" Tobi ran into his room, leaving the girls gasping for breath and an amused Deidara.

"Thanks for these mini explosive things, yeah. They are pretty entertaining, yeah." The blonde walked off to his room, leaving the girls to think about who to prank next.

"Let's prank Kisame next!" Birdy grinned.

"Nah, tomorrow. We're in enough trouble already." They glanced towards where Hidan was, hearing his faint cursing in his room.

"Yeah, you're right."


	8. Missions

FYI: I AM NOT DEAD! I'm so sorry for not posting this sooner, but it has been busy at school and after school so that I could barely get anything done. Plz enjoy this as I tried to make this longer than my usual chapter length.

I'm really sorry to my friends for not posting sooner, especially Dani, who bugs me to write another chapter... and sorry Dani for not putting your confetti egg idea in this chapter. I had a better idea and your idea didn't fit into my idea... but this might be better than the egg idea... lol. Anyways...

* * *

All of the Akatsuki surrounded the kitchen table, including the five girls. A couple of them were standing and Zetsu was half-way popping out of the ceiling.

"Alright, I have a few missions for all of you, and only a few of you will be staying. A few of the jinchuuriki have been spotted, and I will be sending you guys to spy on them and find out their attack patterns so it would be easier to defeat them." Pain glanced around at the members, thinking who to put with who to spy. "You three," He pointed towards Hidan, Kakuzu, and Birdy, "will spy on the two and six tails. You four," He pointed towards Deidara, Sasori, Sam, and Zoe, "will go after the one, three, and five tails. You three," He pointed towards Itachi, Kisame, and Kaisha, "will go find the four and nine tails. And as for you two," He pointed towards Zetsu and Tobi, "go after the remaining two, the seven and eight tails. Understood?" They all nodded. "Good, I want all of you to leave by today or tomorrow morning." Pain stood up and made way to his room, Konan following him.

"Damn it! I have to stay here..." Dani whined at the other four girls, who were slightly excited.

"So? I'm stuck with mister idiotic jack-ass fucktard. Meh..." Birdy whined back to Dani, who sighed.

"Shut up, bitch."

"I'm happy that Tobi and Zoe weren't stuck together in a group. I mean, that would be the apocalypse!" Everyone else agreed at that, knowing that if those two were put together, well... two Tobis is not a good thing.

"I betcha that it's going to be boring." Kaisha sighed.

"Why? I'm the one who's going to stay here, bitch."

"Yeah, well, enjoy. Just wish that I wont be lugging a bag of body parts back with me, meh." Birdy walked into her room, not closing the door completely.

"Watcha doin'?" Zoe looked in. Birdy was on her laptop that she dragged along with her.

"Being bored. It's contagious. If you would like to keep your entertainment, go away. I'm busy."

"Nope! Hug attack!"

"GAAK!" Zoe latched onto Birdy, who struggled to get out of the blonde's death grip. She stood up, and took a few steps, but then collapsed to the ground due to the extra weight.

"What the hell is going on!?" Sam walked in, and laughed when she saw the heap of people on the ground.

"Heeeelp... too much rainbows... sunshine... and happiness... gaaaakkkkk..." Birdy reached out a hand, pleading for help from Zoe's death grip.

"So thats why Zetsu is unable to eat Tobi... the happiness upsets his stomach." Dani cracked up after speaking, laughing at her joke and the glare she got from Birdy.

"Shut up and get this blonde off of me!" Birdy sighed and gave up after she tried to see if anyone would help. After a few minutes, she squirmed around again, and this time she was able to pry Zoe's fingers off. She quickly stood up and darted away so she wouldn't get caught again.

"Dinner!" Konan yelled from the kitchen, the smell of food wafting throughout the house. Almost immediately, a stampede of people stormed into the kitchen.

"FOOD!" Birdy, Dani, and Zoe yelled while trying to squeeze through the door.

"Stop it!" Konan whacked Hidan upside the head with a pan while he was trying to sneak food from the pot.

"Fuck!"

"Serves you right!" Birdy plopped down onto a seat. Hidan stood up and walked over to her.

"Bitch, that's my seat." He grabbed hold of the chair and pulled it back.

"Hidan. Go sit somewhere else. It's just a chair." Konan hit him with a spoon. Hidan growled and moved over to an empty seat. Konan passed out plates and took her own seat. Throughout dinner, there was constant arguments over food and other complaints. After dinner, everyone trailed off into their own rooms, either going to bed, staying up to do other shit, or leave to go on their mission. Tobi, Zetsu, Itachi, Kisame, and Kaisha left, while the others were going to leave in the morning.

"Another long day... meh..." Birdy laid back on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. Due to her insomnia, it is hard to get to sleep, and she usually wakes up around one in the morning and can't get back to sleep, even if she tried. She snagged a book and started to read, zoning out and thinking about tomorrow.

* * *

I know, I know, not that long. My mind hasnt been working well lately. The next chapter probably will be longer due to the fact that there will be fighting and shit like that.

I have a question to all those who read my stories. The five girls in this story are me, and my friends. We are all real, and I want you to guess which one of the five is typing this story! Fun, eh? Only one guess per person, and since I mentioned her at the beginning, Dani is not typing this story so there are four canidates. DANI, PSYCHO FRIENDS, AND PEOPLE WHO KNOW ALREADY WHICH ONE I AM- do not give away the answer, it will ruin the fun. Enjoy guessing! If you get it right, you will get a cookie and a pat on the back! Lol.


End file.

Naruto, Adventure, Humor