Harry Potter Convincing Hermione

**A/N: I usually put these at the end, but you need to know this before you read it! I know this isn't really meant to happen, but this is set the school year after the Battle of Hogwarts, and the whole school is repeating the year due to the disruption from the war. I had to do this to make this story possible; I wanted it to be at Hogwarts, but _after_ Ron and Hermione got together. **

**Disclaimer: I'm not J K Rowling, and I own even less of this than usual, because it's for the "Overheard at Hogwarts Challenge: Part Deux" on HPFC, where we were given a list of quotes and had to include at least 5 of them, but I ignored that and included as many as I could! So chances are, if a bit made you laugh, it's one of those ;) I only take credit for putting them all together!**

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"A surprise party?" Ginny repeated apprehensively, as her, Harry, Ron, Neville, Luna and the rest of the old DA gathered in the Room of Requirement one evening. "For _Hermione_?"

"What?" asked Harry defensively. "It'll be nice!"

"Yes, but... Hermione doesn't exactly strike me as the kind of person that really appreciates surprise parties," said Ginny carefully.

"Don't be ridiculous!" said Ron dismissively. "Of course she will!"

"Well... maybe," said Ginny, shrugging, "but she'll definitely notice you trying to organise it. She's very observant, and no offence, but you two aren't exactly the most... subtle of people, are you?"

"It's okay, we'll make up an excuse," Neville offered.

"Yeah. You can lie to women," said Ron. "They aren't people."

There was a mixture of shock and amusement at this comment.

"That was so offensive, I think it was funny," said Neville faintly.

"I have officially fired you from talking," said Ginny, unimpressed.

"Ron, mate," said Seamus through his incredulous laugher, "Hermione won't stay with you for long if she hears you saying stuff like that."

"Yeah, she will," Ron assured him. "She's my girlfriend. I can do what I like now, and she's not allowed to complain, because she loves me, and that means she doesn't want me to change, right?"

"Uh, I don't think that's how it works," Harry managed to choke out through his laughter. "I've been with more girls than you, and frankly, that really _isn't_ the attitude they have."

"No, it isn't," Ginny confirmed, slapping him over the head playfully.

"Can we get back on topic?" asked Ernie Macmillan impatiently. He felt it morally wrong to be in a meeting (of sorts) and not make an effort to take charge. "How can we organise a party without Hermione noticing? She's also the Head Girl, which doesn't help."

"Yes it does," Ron contradicted her, "it means she has to go and sort things out. Get Peeves to smash something far away from here!" He looked around proudly, seemingly waiting for somebody to congratulate him.

"That's what we did last time we did something illegal, you fool," said Dean, rolling his eyes. "It didn't work that time we tried to Transfigure that bust in the common room to look like Seamus."

"Oh, it wasn't a dream!" Seamus exclaimed. "I keep forgetting that actually happened. I feel so appreciated."

"Really?" demanded Harry. "I wouldn't feel appreciated if somebody tried to make a picture of me with that expression on my face. You looked constipated, mate."

Lavender (who had recovered from her injury at the Battle) and the Patil twins were by now in fits of giggles.

"Shut up! I'll kill you, Potter," Seamus vowed, suddenly remembering. "And you two," he added, gesticulating over at Ron and Dean.

"He won't," said Luna suddenly, speaking for the first time. "He's too lazy to be a serial killer."

Several people snorted, as usual unsure quite how to react to Luna's contribution.

"Anyway," Ginny said, failing to hide her amusement, "maybe we should come back to the practicalities later. I'm sure it'll be fine - we managed to get her out of the way tonight, didn't we? So... how about choosing a theme?"

"Ooh, how about fairy tales?" suggested Lavender eagerly. "Either Muggle or wizard ones!"

"Or we could do a 'love through the ages' sort of thing!" exclaimed Romilda Vane, who didn't even particularly know Hermione, but was always on the scene when a party - even more so, a party involving Harry, she never had got over her crush on him - was mentioned. "We could find partners and dress up as well-known couples!"

Ginny made a face. "Well... it all sounds very nice and everything, but is it really _Hermione_? What do you guys think?"

"Well, all I know is this," began Zacharias Smith, who had been sitting in the corner with his arms folded for all this time. "If I had to choose, I would rather die."

"Oh, thanks so much for the really _constructive_ contribution, Zacharias," snapped Ron. He was still prone to anger whenever Zacharias was around. "I hope you have to watch your children die," he muttered under his breath. Luckily, nobody heard him - or at least, anyone who did pretended they hadn't. "So do _you_ have a better idea?"

"...No," he admitted. Ron sent him a smug look across the room.

"Why don't we just not have a theme, then?" said Harry. "Let's just keep it simple. Hermione will appreciate it all the same. Let's just get food, drinks and a big banner." The girls looked a little disappointed.

"And where shall we have it?" asked Dean.

Everyone looked at him like he was completely stupid.

"In the common room?" he suggested.

"Oh, _definitely_," said Zacharias, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "That's the conclusion logic should lead you to... since half the people here are in Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, and we have the perfect venue_ right here_."

Dean smacked himself in the forehead. "Oh yeah. Sorry."

"So we're not even going to dress up nice?" asked Parvati Patil pleadingly.

"Let's just keep it casual," said Harry. "Just to improve things, make things easier."

The twins and Lavender's faces fell. Romilda, however, stood up.

"No, no, _no_," she said firmly. "All these _improvements_ are bad! Do you want the awkwardest, most boring party on Earth? You're supposed to be boosting the morale of the castle, and you're not even having us dress up!"

"Well, Hermione might not want -" Harry began, but Luna spoke over him.

"Hermione might not be the most _typical_ teenage girl, but she does like to dress up," Luna said. "Don't you remember the Yule Ball? And Bill and Fleur's wedding? Of course she'll appreciate it, Harry. Do you even know her at all?"

There was another awkward silence; Luna had just accused Harry of not knowing one of his closest friends without realising that there was a possibility that he might get offended at this.

"Okay," said Harry, going slightly red. "No fancy dress, but we can dress up a little. Not like dress robes, but you know, smart-ish."

"Okay. I think we can work with that," Padma nodded, looking round at the other girls, who looked satisfied.

"Where are we going to get alcohol from?" asked Ginny. "I know you guys are allowed it," she said, nodding towards the seventh years, "but we aren't technically."

"That can be Seamus's job," said Ron, nodding towards him.

"Why me?" Seamus asked, confused.

"Because you're the one that always seems to be near it," Lavender pointed out, giggling.

"Oi! I'm not _always_ the drunkest, if that's what you're implying," Seamus said, aiming a kick at her.

"Hey!" Ron protested. "You can't abuse girls!"

Ginny snorted. "You never objected before you got together with Hermione. She's training you well."

"And also, see, what you don't understand is that my fists are bisexual: they hit both boys and girls," said Seamus, grinning, but his face quickly fell when his arm received punches from both Ginny and Lavender. "Woah, _sorry_. I was trying to make you laugh. I guess it didn't work."

"Moving on," said Harry hastily, before the conflict could worsen, "how will we distract Hermione so that she doesn't notice that everyone's in here setting up the party? And also, she'll need to dress up, and not know why."

"Well that's easy," said Ginny. "Get Ron to take her on a date!"

Ron looked bewildered. "A date?" he repeated. "In the castle?"

"No, you idiot," she said, rolling her eyes. "Take her into Hogsmeade!"

"But it's not a Hogsmeade weekend," he said slowly. "We aren't allowed!"

"Ron, mate, she's the Head Girl," said Harry. "She won't get in trouble. And besides, the teachers don't have to know, do they? You can get out through one of the passages. Borrow the Map and the Invisibility Cloak."

"I'll cover for her," Ernie offered pompously; he took every opportunity to use his newly-gained Head Boy status.

"Thanks, guys," said Ron appreciatively. "Blimey, a date. We've never really been on a proper _date_ before. There just hasn't been time, what with... everything that happened over the summer..."

There was an uncomfortable silence; although the castle had been completely restored and _looked_ as though nothing had happened, and mostly it felt like that too, they couldn't avoid those moments when they noticed gaping holes in their lives.

"Well," said Luna, the first to recover, "there's a first time for everything, isn't there?"

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**A/N 2: Well that's it for now... this was going to be a one-shot, but I decided to extend it to a three-shot. I don't know how soon the next parts will be coming, but they will be here sometime, I promise.**

**I would love you to leave a review and tell me what you thought!**


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Harry Potter, Humor, Romance