Buffy X-overs 20 Minutes with Riley

TTH Challenge 952: "Twenty Minutes with Riley"

Title: "Twenty Minutes with Riley."

Author: Elaine

Rating: FR13

Spoilers: none, really.

Setting: Post-series for Buffy, post season 8 for Stargate Sg-1.

Summary: Everyone knows that demons take the summer off. What does Riley Finn & his unit do to fill up his schedule during the off months?

Disclaimer: I own nothing; all characters belong to Joss Whedon or whoever owns Stargate SG-1. This is for entertainment purposes only, no copyright infringement intended.

Challenge: Take 20 Minutes and write about Riley in a crossover setting. You will need to write for no more and no less than 20 Minutes, so pay attention and keep on track. Writing the header and/or title of the fic does not count. Please use the entire 20 Minutes for writing the fic.

General Jack O'Neill, Colonel Samantha Carter, Dr. Daniel Jackson, and Teal'c gathered in the conference room.

"I don't mind giving the briefing, Jack. I'm just confused as to why I'm briefing three agents from Homeland Security when we fall under Home_world_ Security."

Jack opened his hands, in an 'I don't know why, either' gesture. "Because the President says these guys are resourceful and we might benefit from their expertise. Then again, he also picked Kinsey for his running mate, so what does he really know? He also said something about keeping these guys busy during their slow season."

The commanding officer of the Stargate Command was cut off by a knock on the door. Sgt. Davis then opened the door and announced "General, your 9:00 appointment is here."

"Thanks, Sergeant. Show them in."

Lt. Graham Miller, Agent Sam Finn, and Capt. Riley Finn entered the conference room deep within Cheyenne Mountain. Sgt. Davis introduced the Air Force personnel in the room: General Jack O'Neill, Colonel Samantha Carter, Dr. Daniel Jackson, a civilian consultant, and an imposing figure referred to only as 'Murray.'

After the obligatory hand shaking, Capt. Finn held up a PDA and appeared to aim it at 'Murray.' After the device beeped three times, he asked, "So, 'Murray,' what's your real name and species?"

Lt. Miller held up a hand and said "Before you answer that question – I got twenty-five bucks that says the hat's hiding a third eye" as he pulled some bills out of his pants pocket.

"I call antennae!" Agent Finn said quickly and added her stake to the pot.

Captain Finn grimaced slightly. "Darn, that only leaves horns. I mean; he obviously doesn't have horns." He grudgingly added his $25.00 to the small pile on the table.

"Aw, Ri, he might be filing the horns down, like in _Hellboy_," Sam Finn comforted

The SGC personnel started at the newcomers; Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow, and then glanced at O'Neill. He answered, "they're cleared, you can answer him."

"You do not seem shocked that I am not human, Captain. My name is Teal'c, and I am Jaffa," he replied with a bow, and then he removed his hat. The three visitors stared at the gold medallion embedded in the Jaffa's forehead.

Gen. O'Neill asked, "so, who gets the pot when it's 'none of the above'?"

Lt. Miller answered, "The pot goes to charity."

"In that case, I'll just pass this along to the local 'Relay for Life' chapter," Jack said as he scooped up the $75.00.

Daniel pulled Jack aside. "But Jack, they're betting on Teal'c appearance!" he protested.

"Danny, Cassie's helping with collecting the donations at the relay this weekend. It's going to a good cause" Jack whispered back.

"You'd be shocked at what doesn't shock us anymore. And as long as a species doesn't kill humans in war or for sport, eat humans in whole or in part, enslave humans, or take over our bodies, we tend to get along just fine."

Dr. Jackson, perhaps to steer the conversation to a more familiar topic, said "Funny you should mention taking humans as hosts…" and began his briefing.

"So that is the Stargate program and our ongoing war with the Goa'uld in a nutshell," Gen. O'Neill said. Throughout the briefing, he watched the visitors and paid attention to their body language. They listened intently, asked a few clarifying questions here and there, and never once declared disbelief. When Daniel mentioned Anubis' "Super Soldiers," both Miller and Finn shuddered slightly. All of which made General O'Neill wonder what exactly they did during their _busy_ season. "Would you like a break before you start going over your recommendations?"

Miller and Agent Finn both shook their heads when Capt. Finn looked to them for their input. "We've been taking notes. We can give you the main recommendations right now, and send you the written report later. First off, you should think of including a k-bar or other large bladed weapons in your arsenal. Why kill only the host with a gun when the snake can still survive and take another host? Decapitation is an efficient way of killing both the Goa'uld and the host in combat, when you don't have the time or medical facilities to remove the Goa'uld from the host."

Lt. Miller spoke next "And since a human can only be a host once, have you thought of getting one of those Tok'Ra snakes to temporarily take over all your personnel? That way, you can be sure that everyone going off-world can't be snaked."

O'Neill replied, "Uh, we never actually thought about that before. We could ask the Tok'Ra…" he trailed off as he mulled it over.

Capt. Finn jumped in. "But from what you've indicated, they'd probably say no. I don't think I've ever heard of such unhelpful allies before. And what's up with taking three thousand years to defeat the same enemy? It's as if they don't _want_ to defeat the Goa'uld, just keep them in check." Capt. Finn turned to Agent Finn. "Sounds just like the PTB," he said under his breath. Agent Finn nodded her agreement.

He continued. "Do you have any dead Goa'uld specimens? There may be a way to extract something and make it into an inoculation against possession."

Carter's eyes lit up. "I've worked with the med lab before – I can start looking into it right away!"

Agent Finn spoke next. "And about those Super Soldiers. You had a weapon that worked against them, but they get around that now. You said flamethrowers didn't work against them, but have you tried liquid nitrogen? You could dowse them with it until they're brittle, then shoot them with a .45 and watch them shatter!"

O'Neill snapped his fingers. "That could work on the Replicators, too."


End file.

Buffy X-overs, Humor