Twilight 1. Chapter 1

CPOV

"Gianna can you please send in the next patient?"

"Of course Dr. Cullen," she replies. I look over the next patient's information. Esme Anne Platt, 25, rape victim one year ago, pregnancy, miscarriage. Oh man this was going to be hard on her. There is a knock on the door.

"Come in," I say. The door opens to reveal a beautiful woman with brown eyes and caramel hair. She's medium height and has gorgeous soft supple curves. Whoa calm down, stay professional Carlisle, I chastise myself. I am also confused. I never get that sidetracked with this job. Accompanying her is the nurse who got her ready in her gown.

"Good Afternoon Esme, please take a seat," I gesture to the cot. She sits but doesn't look comfortable, I don't blame her. She also has her eyes planted on her shoes. "How are you?" I ask.

"I'm good, how are you?" she asks, finally meeting my eyes. Her voice is captivating, even in her nervousness.

"I'm OK, just tired. It's been a long day," I respond. "Are you ready?" she nods. "I know this will be difficult for you, I'm going to be as gentle as I can. I promise I will not hurt you intentionally but if you feel any discomfort please tell me right away," I tell her as soothingly as I can.

"I'll be fine Dr. Cullen, thank you," Esme says.

"Well then, let's get started. Can you please lie down for me?" I ask as I clean my hands and get my gloves on. Maria the nurse is getting all the equipment ready. When I touch her stomach she giggles a little.

"I'm sorry," I say.

"It's OK you didn't hurt me, I'm just ticklish," she says and I see her blush.

As we are going through the bi-manual exam I know she's nervous because her vagina is tense around my fingers. I ask her the basic questions and finish up.

"We will call with your results from the swabs soon. But everything looks good," I tell Esme.

"Thank you," she says as she gets up to leave.

ESPOV

I can't believe how turned on I got by Doctor Cullen. Obviously he's very handsome with his typical blond hair and blue eyes and his sculpted beautiful face. I haven't felt attracted to anyone in over a year. After Charles beat and raped me then losing my baby, I just feel like I don't deserve to see anyone that way anymore. I've been tarnished and had my innocence taken away by that bastard who's now rotting in jail. I just want to get home to my sister Rose and eat.

When I get home I change into sweatpants and a big t-shirt and cuddle up on the sofa with some spaghetti for lunch and put on The Simpsons. Rose walks into the apartment with bags of groceries so I get up to hug and help her.

"How was your appointment?" Rose asks me while we're putting away the groceries. I knew she was worried. I should have called her but I didn't want to bother her while she was at work.

"It was fine," I say a little too quickly and I accidentally drop a can of soup I was putting on the shelf.

"What happened?" she asks as she comes over to pick up the can and put it away.

I go back to sit on the couch and pat the seat next to me. Rose comes and sits beside me and I stretch my legs across her lap. "It was fine, it's just that Dr. Cullen was a little too handsome," I tell her.

"Es, how was he possibly too handsome?"

"I don't want to see people that way anymore! I don't deserve it Rosalie. I'm screwed up, I shouldn't see anyone that way anymore. It's not right. I don't deserve it," I look down at my plate of spaghetti, I'm not hungry anymore.

"Esme don't you dare say that. You deserve so much," She grabs my chin so I look at her. "You and I both know what Charles did wasn't fair to you and I get it. I felt exactly the same way when Royce did it to me but what did you tell me then? What did my big sister tell me?" She waits for my answer.

"I told you that you can't give up and let that asshole win. I told you to stand with your head held high and show the bastard that he can't touch you again, that you win Rose," I mumble.

"Exactly. Take your own advice Es. I love you, you're all I have now. Mom and Dad want nothing to do with us but who cares? We have each other. I have to take care of you just like you take care of me," She smiles at me and I smile back.

"We should go out tonight, its Friday let's go to the bar, I need a drink or two and I want wings," I tell her, I see her eyes light up.

"Yes! I would love to. Get some rest we'll leave around 8," Rose says. She gives me a peck on the cheek and leaves to go to her room. I put my spaghetti on the coffee table and get comfy on the couch.

I wake up about an hour and a half later and it's a little after 6:30. I get up and go to my bathroom and shower. I get into my routine; shampoo and condition, coconut body wash, I don't need to shave I did that last night, wash my face and while doing everything I try and figure out what I'll wear. When I'm done I brush my teeth and go to do my makeup which is always tedious. When I finish with that I go to the closet and pick out my burgundy t-shirt, with fake leather pants that Rose says look great on me. I get my favorite black booties and some jewelry.

I pin up my wavy hair in a half up half down style and get my jacket on. It's almost 8 so I go knock on Rose's door and let myself in. She's finishing up with hoop earrings.

"You ready girly?" I ask her.

"Yep. You look hot!" she exclaims.

I blush, "you look gorgeous," Rosalie's wearing blue skinny jeans, a grey tank top and a black leather jacket and black pumps. "Let's go!"

I grab my clutch and we lock up. When we get outside we're hit with the chilliness. It's not too cold, it's early September in Seattle. We walk to the bar down the block and once we're there we get seated and to start we each get a shot of tequila, it's kind of our little tradition. We order wings and we each get a pint. I ask her about work, Rosalie works as a Human Resource Manager. She complains about some people but that's the usual. As I'm taking a sip of beer after a good laugh, I notice two men at the bar looking at Rose and I.

One of them is very muscular he's huge. He has curly brown hair and blue eyes that look familiar. Then I look at the man sitting beside him, blond hair, blue eyes, sculpted face… Dr. Cullen. Oh my God.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry I didn't say anything before, I'm still getting a hang of this. Thank you so much for reading! I had a little fantasy and thought "why not expand on it?" and this story was born.**

**Please leave me reviews! I would love some feedback.**

CPOV

After Esme leaves I head to my office, close the door behind me, I plop onto my chair and put my head in my hands. _What just happened?! _Of course Esme is gorgeous, but I'm her doctor. I have to stay professional and I almost lost it in there, her giggle and her soft skin….STOP IT! I wouldn't deserve her.

My phone ringing startles me out of my musings. "Doctor Cullen, I have Emmett on line 2 for you," says Gianna.

"OK thank you," I switch to line 2, "Hello?"

"Hey big brother! How are you?" asks Emmett.

"I'm good, just dead tired"

"Do you want to go out tonight? I can meet you at your place and we can head over to the bar," Emmett requests.

"Actually yeah I definitely need a drink. I'll see you later, around 8?"

"Are you OK? You don't sound too great,"

"I'll tell you about it later, it's nothing serious,"

"OK, I'll see you, cheer up man,"

"Bye Em," I end the call. Thank god for my brother, I don't know where I would be without him, he's helped me more than he will ever know.

I see a few more patients and finish up some paper work, the whole while Esme was on my mind. I have to tell Emmett about her. At 5 I leave the office to go home. When I get home I go shower and get ready for the evening. I make a sandwich and go read.

I get so caught up in reading I didn't realize how much time passed but Emmett was knocking on my door. When I open it Emmett has a huge grin on his face and pulls me into one of his big hugs. He and I aren't ashamed of our brotherly bond.

"Hey little one, how's it going?" I ask.

"I'm awesome, I just got a modelling job,"

"So we're celebrating?"

"Obviously. You're looking at Calvin Klein's newest underwear model. So I can get you free tighty whities anytime,"

"That's amazing! I'm so proud of you," I tell him.

"OK let's get going man!" Emmett exclaims. We head downstairs and walk to the bar a couple blocks away. Its Emmett's favourite bar. Once there we head to the bar stools and order two beers. He and I catch up and talk about his new job. I tell him about Esme and how I feel like I'm crazy for feeling this way.

"Carlisle, if you think she's hot, why not? You were her doctor this one time because no one else was available, so what's the big deal?" he questions me.

"It doesn't matter what the time frame is and I don't deserve her. She's too sweet and innocent," I remember her giggle. Then I _hear _it. I look around the bar and see her, she's sitting with a blonde, both girls sipping on their pints. _Damn _that's hot. Emmett turns to look when I nudge him.

"She's hot," he says, and I glare at him.

"That's Esme. With the caramel hair," I tell him.

"I meant the blonde, you know I love me some blondes," while we're talking Esme looks up and she sees me, I freeze and Emmett starts to get up.

"What are you doing?" I ask him.

"I'm going to introduce myself, come if you want," I roll my eyes but get up and follow him. When we get over to the girls he taps the blonde on her shoulder and starts chatting with her. Esme is very obviously trying not to look at me, but she looks like she gives up because we end up staring at each other. Emmett turns to Esme and says, "If you don't mind I would love to steal your sister for a little, I can take her home." I see Rosalie nodding to Esme behind Emmett.

"Yeah of course. I'll see you later Rose," Esme says. Rosalie and Emmett get up to leave and Esme and I watch them leave.

Once they're gone I turn back to Esme. "Mind if I sit?"

"Yes please," she gestures to the seat across from her. "So Doctor Cullen, how are you?"

"Please call me Carlisle," I say.

ESPOV

He's sitting across from me and I have no idea what to say. We've gotten as far as his reply, "please call me Carlisle".

"OK _Carlisle_, how are you?" I ask.

"I'm good, I haven't seen my brother in a long time so it was a great surprise," why does he have this effect on me? I never know what to say. So I take a sip of my beer which is getting a little warm.

"That's nice that you get to hang out with him. Do you two have any special plans?"

"No we just came to get a few drinks. He was excited to tell me he got a modelling job," he smirks.

"Modelling for what?" I ask.

"Calvin Klein underwear," he lets out a small chuckle and I giggle a lit, his eyes light up.

"I'm sure the idea will intrigue Rosalie," I say. Then we both laugh.

"Ok, I'm just going to say this, I know this is really awkward and I'm sorry," he says.

"Yeah a little, you _were _just examining my most private area, so yeah it's awkward," I smile. And he give me a small apologetic smile.

"I am sorry about that. You are a beautiful woman Esme. I would love to take you out again another time. Somewhere nicer perhaps? And we can restart, awkwardness free." Oh what the hell why not Esme? Because you don't deserve it, I argue with myself. Yes I do!

"I would love to Carlisle," I say. We exchange numbers and set up a date a week from now. We finish our beers and he offers to walk me home. We walk back to my apartment in a comfortable silence but our hands keep finding a way to brush each other. When we get there I stop and he stands in front of me.

"I'll see you next week," I say.

"Yeah, I'm looking forward to it," he strokes my cheekbone with his thumb and whispers, "Goodnight Esme."

"Goodnight Carlisle," I whisper back. He leaves and I walk up the steps to my building.

Once I'm in my apartment I lock the door and take a deep breath. That just happened. I send a text to Rose to tell her I'm home. I go to my room, I change into my sweats and t-shirt, put my hair in a braid, and clean off my makeup. When I'm done I settle on the couch with some milk and put on the tv.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? You know you're mine! I claimed you, you little slut. I marked you," he yells at me. His hands around my wrists. He has them pinned above my head against the wall.

"You don't own me you bastard!" I yell back and I spit in his face.

"What did you just call me? WHAT did you just call ME? You're a slut. No one will ever love you. I own you whore. You need to respect your owner more," he snarls as he pulls me away from the wall and shoves me back. The force makes my skull snap against the wall but I'm still fighting him. "Obviously, I need to teach you some manners. Turn around!"

"No, go fuck yourself," I spit back at him.

"Oh no, that's what you're here for. TURN AROUND!" he shouts in my face. When I still struggle he forces me around, pinning my arms in his hand like a vise, and shoving my forehead into the wall. He rips my pants down and shoves himself into me. It hurts so badly but I don't scream. I don't give him the pleasure of knowing how he hurts me. "You're _mine _slut, understand?" He snarls again. And now I give in. I don't have the strength to keep fighting so I nod with hot tears pouring down my face, while I scream.

I'm shaken awake and I'm still screaming, my arms flailing, "Don't touch me!" I yell over and over.

"Esme it's me, it's Rose you're OK. I've got you," she lifts my upper body and embraces me while a sob uncontrollably into her chest. All she can do is reassure me, embrace me and that's all I need her to do.


	3. Chapter 3

I wake up with my head still on Rosalie's shoulder, but we're both lying on the couch quite uncomfortably. My eyes feel raw and puffy, and I have a headache from crying so much. When I move to get up she shifts but doesn't wake up. I feel so bad, I don't deserve her.

I walk to my room and into my washroom. I go to the mirror and what I see scares me, I'm pale, my skin dry, eyes bloodshot and rimmed red, and my hair is everywhere. I wash my face and brush my teeth and go to make breakfast for Rose and I.

I think pancakes sound good and my stomach growls in agreement. I set the breakfast bar with two glasses of orange juice, the pancakes and Nutella. I go to wake Rosalie and she's not there on the couch anymore. When I'm about to call for her she comes out of her room. She has changed into her comfy clothes and has freshened up. I realize in that moment that she had slept in her clothes from last night.

"How are you?" she asks.

"I'm ok. Thank you for taking care of me last night Rose, I don't know what I'd do without you," I say as I go to hug her. She hugs me back and kisses my cheek. "Come I made us breakfast!"

"Mmmm, oh my God, your pancakes are a blessing. And Nutella!" she praises.

"Only the best for my favourite sister."

"Your only sister."

"Yeah yeah, just eat," and I give her my joking serious look. When we're done we go to do the dishes, she washes and I dry. "What are your plans for today?" I ask.

"I will be staying here with you, and doing whatever you want to."

"Rose if you have plans go do what you need to. You don't need to babysit me, I'm fine."

And then Rosalie had to address the elephant in the room, "Es I haven't seen you cry like that in months! I am definitely not leaving your side today, before you start your shit again. I don't really want to come home and find you passed out and covered in blood _again_!"

I take a deep breath to compose myself. I'm about to yell back but I know she's right and I do need her. I count to ten in my head before I say anything.

"I'm sorry. And I do need you but Rose, I'm not going to go back to that. I promise you, but the dream just took me by surprise last night, I haven't had that one for two months. I love you and believe me, I'm so thankful for everything you do, but you need to have a little more faith in me," as I tell her this, I can see tears building in her eyes and my sight becomes blurry with my own.

"I love you too and I'm sorry that you feel like I don't have faith in you, but you know how much that scared me. I can't lose you, you're all I have now," she cries. We're both sobbing and I have to force myself to stop because my eyes still hurt from last night.

I can't say anything because if I do, will explode, so I settle for holding her and wait till we both calm down. I remember when she was a little girl and I'd chase her and Jasper around at the park, I could pick them out from a crowd of hundreds of children- their hair being the most unique honey blond that almost shines like gold. When one twin would get hurt the other would cry for them.

I giggle softly at the memory- Rose scraping her knee on the sidewalk, Jasper crying for her and she was reassuring him that she was ok both were just seven- I was ten but mature for my age, I had to be. Sibling love is so unique, especially twins. How times have changed.

"Why are you laughing?" she asks, as she pulls away.

"Just remembering when you fell on the sidewalk, and Jasper was balling his eyes out for you," I explain. And she giggles and it soon turns sad.

"Come on we're going for a drive. Go get ready," I tell her.

"Where?"

"Just wear jeans and a t-shirt," I tell her.

"One simply does not wear jeans and a t-shirt," she pouts.

"Well you don't. Go get ready!" I exclaim, trying to lighten the mood as I spin her and push her in the direction of her room. I finish packing away the dishes because I know she'll take longer to get ready.

After about a minute she's back, and when I turn she's on her cell talking to someone, "Uhm, no not really…actually we're going out…I'll tell her you called…yes Carlisle I will give her your number…ok…bye."

I look at her questioningly. "It was Carlisle, he says 'hi'," Rose says. And I continue staring expectantly. "He wants me to give you his number to call him back. But not now. It's our day," she says sternly.

"Is it about my results?" I ask.

"No he just wanted to talk, Emmett gave him my number. He said he tried your phone but he didn't get through," she explains.

"Whatever, I hope it wasn't serious, but that's not a puzzle for today. You're still not ready. Go!"

As she leaves I let my shoulders fall and sigh. I really do hope it wasn't serious and now I feel bad. But I'll call tomorrow. Today is not a man-drama day.

I go to get ready. I put my hair in a braid, a pair of blue jeans and light knitted, white v-neck sweater. Light makeup. I go to the living room and put on my brown combat boots. I remember to grab my car charger and my dead phone. Ten minutes later I'm standing at the door, still waiting for Rosalie.

"Rosalie hurry up!" I yell.

"Damn I'm coming, hold on," she yells back. I can hear her heels hitting the hardwood as she gets closer. When I see her I stare pointedly at her. "Stop, or you're going to burn a hole in my face. Let's go," she says.

I roll my eyes and say, "You're going to want to change into boots."

"Ugh, don't complain about me taking long because of this," she exclaims. She turns and heads back to her room. She comes back in black flats-not boots but whatever, I warned her.

"Will these do?" she asks sweetly.

"No but don't say I didn't warn you," I say. We head out and down to parking lot. I know I have a couple flip-flops in my car so she'll be fine.

Once we're in my car- my black Dodge Challenger- I start it and plug in my phone, put on my playlist and buckle up, she turns to ask so impatiently, "Ok Es, where are we going?"

"Buckle up," I reply.

"Esme!" she complains. While fumbling with her seat belt.

"To the beach," I turn to smile at her.

**I'm so sorry I haven't been uploading anything. I had exams, wisdom teeth surgery and bad recovery and now school is crazy busy. **

**Will try to upload again Saturday evening or Sunday.**

**Please leave reviews!**


	4. Chapter 4

The familiar crescent shaped beach of First Beach in La Push is a very welcome sight. Rose had drifted off on the long drive here so I shake her awake and when she sees where we are tears start to fill her eyes. I know she's remembering the good times we had here; dad chasing us through the shallow waters, collecting the pretty multi-coloured stones with mom to take home to our flower garden, bonfires at night while cuddling up with Rosalie and Jasper. They were happy times, when we actually lived. Now all we're doing is just surviving through each day. I miss it so much, our parents' love and most of all- Jasper.

I turn to Rose, "You ready?" I ask.

She faces me and with a bright smile, "Yes, let's go."

We walk straight towards the water, with our arms around each other's waists and sit on the stones right before the point where the water reaches. The sun is glinting off the grey-blue water. Farther out are large menacing waves and just a couple feet from us are the welcoming waves, beckoning us to join them to play.

"Do you think I'm being stupid for ignoring Carlisle?" I ask Rose, who's been very quiet.

"A little. But I also completely understand why you're putting it off. You're scared to get hurt."

"It's not just me I'm worried about, I'm scared I'll hurt him. He doesn't deserve to deal with my shit with me. I don't want to put him through that hell," I explain. She's quiet for a couple minutes.

"I get it. But I think you should try and give yourself some credit. You've made it so far with your healing process Es, you're stronger than I ever was. If I were you I'd at least go on a date with him, try and open up a little, see if he's compassionate enough to understand something of this magnitude."

"Rose I can't be that open right away though," I tell her.

"You can try to open up a little, see if you're comfortable enough with him and see where it goes. Stop making excuses! If you don't call him, I will" she says sternly.

"Okay, I'll call him later," I assure her and she nods in approval. I go back to the car to make an important call and to grab a bag filled with a couple blankets, a lighter, and all the ingredients for s'mores and a surprise. I had to make a second trip to collect the cooler with sandwiches and beer in it.

Rosalie started building a fire pit, I could see her down the shore, collecting dried driftwood and I set up our blankets and pulled out the cheese sandwiches and popped open two Corona's as Rosalie was walking back with arms full of wood. "You could have helped me you know," Rosalie chastised me.

"Hey I got beer and weed," I shot back.

"Really Es? I haven't smoked since high school"

"Well I ran in to an old friend and thought it would be fun," I said with an impish smile as I handed her a joint. I didn't have to worry about anyone seeing- the beach was pretty much empty except for a few gangly looking Quileute boys down the beach. Rose took the joint with a huge grin plastered on her face, she sat next to me, wrapped a blanket around herself and put it in front of her.

I got up to set the fire. The bright blue-green flames shot up the teepee Rose formed quickly. As I sat next to her she asked me, "Are you going to give me the lighter or not?"

"Just be patient," I replied. She looked confused but we were interrupted by familiar hoots and yelps of laughter. Rosalie's head spun around so fast I'm surprised she didn't give herself a whiplash.

"Rosalie!" shouted one of the boys.

"SETH?!" she shouted back, and just like that she was up and running full speed at him. He caught her and she had her arms and legs wrapped around him. Following behind Seth was Jacob, Embry, Quil and Sam. I got up and jogged over and went straight to Jake and he hugged me in that rib crushing, knock the breath out of you way that I love as he nestled his face in my hair.

" Hey Essie," he whispered, and I had to laugh. I hadn't heard that name in over 10 years.

"Aw Jake I missed you," I whispered back. I let him go and he put his hands on both side of my face and planted a kiss on my forehead, he wiped away tears that I didn't know had shed and he pulled me in for a hug again.

"Jake stop hogging her! We wanna hug her too," whined Seth. Jake stared at him but let me go. He went to give Rosalie a hug and all of a sudden I had four pairs of massive hot arms around me, then Rose and Jacob joined in.

"Okay guys! I love you all but I'm being baked," I said. And they all let go except for Jake he wrapped an arm around my waist and we walked back to our little camp set up. The boys brought a bag with two bottles of whisky, cups, plates and utensils. Grilling racks, more blankets and a cooler with some steaks. We all got settled in, Jake and I covering under a blanket, Rose and Seth and the boys were strewn about.

"How did this happen?" asked Rosalie.

"Well Esme called me and told me you guys were here. We would have gotten here faster but we wanted to get the steaks, and I grabbed the drinks," Sam explained. Rose stared at me but smiled. She looked like little Rosalie again, we were surrounded by our best friends, doing what we used to love. We talked, drank, smoked, ate like crazy, and laughed so much we were crying as Embry and Quill tried to set up the grilling racks and Quil almost tripped Embry into the fire. Embry chased him around and smacked Quil with the rack and pushed him into the water, where he fell and got soaked from head to toe.

As Rosalie took a bite of the steak she made an odd expression. "This is deer isn't it?" she asked.

"Yeah. Oh _yeah_, I forgot you hate deer meat, I'm sorry," said Sam.

"She waved him off, "its ok I'll eat the sandwiches. I just remember how gross they looked when Grandpa had them hanging in the garage." And I shook my head at her. She was always so picky.

Everyone is drunk and high so we all got comfy and lounged around the warm fire. Jake and I were laying facing each other and catching up on life. Jake's a year younger than me but he was always _bigger _than me. He always protected me. He's just been taking care of his dad. He opened up a mechanic shop- it was always his dream, and he actually just got his high school diploma and year ago. When his mother died, he more or less dropped out in his Junior year and just took care of his dad who was bedridden for eight months from the same accident that killed his wife and he's been in a wheel chair ever since. Two years ago, Jake's sister moved back from Hawaii and straightened him out, so he got to finish high school.

"So what's been up with you for the past five years?" He asked. And I froze. "What is it?"

"I'm getting cold, I'm going to go change. Wanna come?" I asked. He nodded and we headed to my car. When he saw my hair he let out a whistle of appreciation.

"What I wouldn't give to play with her," he said with wide eyes.

"You can take a look if you want, I was actually hoping you could check something out. She's been making some funny noises and I don't know anything about this," he looked at me, with his shocked expression engraved on his face as if set in stone. I popped the hood and tossed a small flashlight at him, which he barely caught. I was parked under a street light but it was still pretty dim.

"I'm going to change so..."

"Oh! Yeah," he blushed and he was hidden behind the hood. I opened the trunk- where my bag was and looked around, I didn't see anyone so I pull off my blue jeans, grab my sweats and pull them on and I pull a hoodie over my head. I close the trunk and go to Jacob who has managed to get grease all over his hands and some smeared on his cheek. I looks up when I stand next to him and I reach up to wipe his cheek with the sleeve of my hoodie. He rests his head in my hand.

He reaches for me and places his hands on my hips and pulls me towards him and I stop breathing as our bodies meet but in that good way, not the terrified way. My hand is still on his cheek so I slide it behind his neck, feeling his short, cropped hair in between my fingers. Jacob leans down and ever so softly touches his lips to mine. And I feel… electric, like that calm before the storm that makes your hair stand on end but it intensifies as I bring my left hand up and put it behind his neck too, pulling him closer to me and he brings his hand up to my cheeks. I can't even remember the last time I had a kiss like this. I don't think I ever have.

I pull away and lean into his chest, revelling in the feel of my Jacob, my best friend. He hugs me close to him.

"I missed you so much Essie," Jacob whimpered. And I hummed in response. This was bliss. "Are you ready to go back?" he asked. No, I thought. Why would I ever want to go back in the darkness? I wasn't ready. But I know what he meant.

"Yeah, let's go."


End file.

Twilight