Avengers Pick Up Lines, Co-Write with KitKatOreo

A/N: So this is more crack fic-y than the stuff I usually do but it's still a story so I figured, why not? I don't have a lot typed up for this yet but I do have the entire story line finished (courtesy of the amazing KitKatOreo who came up with the concept and the storyline but trusted me to put her garbled plot notes into a cohesive story). The entire story should be done and posted by the end of the summer, since I sort of wanted to give it to KitKat as a going away present since we're both heading off to college in the fall :D

Anyway! I don't own the Avengers, or Thor. I wish I did... But I don't. Sorry, guys.

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Loki walked slowly through the streets, hands in his pockets as he tried his best to not shiver from the cold. For so early into the winter, the air had a sharp bite to it that made the man glad to have picked up his thicker coat before heading to work.

The weather is so strange lately... First snow yesterday, and a lightning storm this afternoon... I wonder what tomorrow will bring. Blue skies or a tornado, he scoffed to himself quietly.

So tied up in his thoughts, Loki failed to notice a door opening from a business he tried his best to avoid. A man stumbled from the cheap bar, tripping over his own feet before slamming painfully into Loki's shoulder. Startled, Loki backed away from the man, grimacing in pain. The other man was a little less fortunate, falling back and landing on the concrete, his face twisting with discomfort as he landed, blinking in surprise.

"Woah... Sorry there," the man slurred, chuckling at a joke Loki couldn't find. The man shook his head lightly before scrambling to his feet, stepping closer to Loki than the dark haired man wished. The man blinked, studying Loki carefully through his fuzzy thoughts. "Now I'm really sorry... You from Tennessee? 'Cause you're the only ten I see."

The man hiccuped, laughing at his overused line. As if that had guaranteed him an in, the man drew even closer to Loki, who had to lean away, smelling the alcohol on the drunk's breath.

"Please step away," Loki said curtly.

"Only if you're stepping with me, babe," the man grinned back crookedly. Loki, resisting the urge to sigh, hardly noticed the figure approaching from behind until the stranger spoke.

"You have precisely three seconds to back away," the stranger said bluntly, casually placing his arm around Loki's shoulders. Loki turned to look at the new annoyance, but couldn't see his face past the hood pulled over his head. In the dim streetlight, the only discernable feature was the man's long blond hair and the very noticeable muscles resting along Loki's shoulders. "One... Two... Odin help me if you allow me to reach three."

Sensing danger but too foolish or drunk to back away, the man sneered at his perceived opponent.

"Well, good looking said nothing about a boyfriend."

"Probably because I do not and-"

"You want one?" the man winked, cutting Loki off mid-sentence. Impatient, Loki continued on.

"I do not and do not want a boyfriend. And, in response to your question, increasingly less so."

The stranger with his arm draped across Loki's shoulders tightened his grip ever so slightly and Loki could almost sense the man's grin.

"And that would be your cue to leave. Now."

Defeated, the drunk scowled before turning away, retreating back into the bar for another unneeded round. When the door was slammed shut behind him, Loki sighed tiredly, glancing over at his saviour.

"Thank you for-"

Loki's voice died quickly in his throat as the stranger turned to face Loki, pulling his hood down. Startled, Loki's eyes studied the man's familiar features, familiar because he had met this man before.

"It was my pleasure," the stranger said, bowing his head slightly when it became evident that Loki was unable to continue his sentence. "It has been some time since I've needed to scare people away in that fashion."

"Oh, so you are scary in more than one way?" Loki smirked lightly. The stranger grinned, a warm light exuding from him that seemed to drive the cold away from Loki's body, filling him with a strange warmth.

Curious about this enigma, Loki decided right then and there that he would find out more about this stranger. Never before had he felt this sort of warmth, just as he'd never seen anyone's face so many times in his dreams.

"My name is Loki," he introduced himself, holding out his hand. "Loki Lureri."

"It is nice to meet you, Loki. I'm Thor Odinson," the man, Thor, replied with a smile, accepting Loki's hand without question. Loki tried very hard to not think of how well their hands meshed together, or how strong Thor's grip was, or how warm the man felt even through his gloves. In fact, he tried very hard not to think at all.

"Have I met you before?" Loki asked with a thoughtful frown. "I have the strangest feeling of deja vu right now."

"I doubt that we've met before. I've just come to the city today."

"First time to New York, then?... It's strange. You just look very familiar... I'm sure it's nothing."

"Most likely."

"Well," Loki began with a smile, "if it is your first time here, then let me be the first to welcome you. New York City, the city that never sleeps," he introduced sarcastically, gesturing around to the almost silent cold street. The only hub of activity to be found was the old bar, from which pounded a soft but constant thrum of conversation, laughter, and occasionally shouting. The rest of the street was dark except where it was sparsely lit by dim streetlights and the asphalt still bore small patches of snow where it survived the rain from the morning's thunderstorm.

"A lively scene, indeed," Thor added smoothly, smiling yet again. Loki wondered for a brief moment if he always smiled, for he seemed to each time Loki opened his mouth to speak. "If all nights are this busy, I doubt I shall survive long."

"You learn to cope... So, what brought you to New York, if you'll pardon my curiosity," Loki added, not looking to offend his new acquaintance.

"A desire for a change in scenery, a mission to find an old friend, that sort of thing."

"An old friend? Anyone I might know?"

"I doubt it," Thor added with a strangely knowing smile. Brushing away the questions threatening to form on his tongue, Loki glanced quickly at his watch and was startled by the lateness of the hour.

"Would you look at the time... I've got to get home."

"Would you like me to walk with you? In case any others decide that you are within your league?"

"What about yourself then?" Loki shot back smoothly, raising an eyebrow. Thor only laughed.

"I'd never dream of such a thing. However, you could deign to allow me to walk with you."

"Hmm... I suppose I could allow it," Loki said with a joking smile. Thor bowed his head once more, his arm sweeping out in front of him as invitation for Loki to lead the way. Holding back a smile, Loki bowed his head in return and began to walk, Thor keeping pace easily.

Keeping up conversational banter, Loki nearly failed to notice when the two had reached his apartment. Snapping out of the easy companionship he felt with this near stranger, Loki was almost sad to recognize his front door. Unlocking the door, Loki was deliberately slow in opening the door, not wanting to go to his empty flat when he was able to walk the streets with his new acquaintance.

When the door was opened, and Loki about to step inside, he paused, looking back at Thor.

"Where are you staying tonight?" he asked curiously. Thor looked oddly bashful, shrugging.

"I was likely going to find an inn until I could find more permanent lodgings."

"Do you want to stay here the night? There aren't many hotels in this part of town, and it's too late to really get anywhere."

"Are you sure?" Thor asked, sounding surprised at the offer. Loki nodded his reply before opening the door wider.

"Come on in."

A/N:

No one confused yet?

You'll understand later if you don't; if you do, let's party *pumps up the jams*

See you next time!

^.^ Susie ^.^


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Avengers, Family, Fantasy