Harry Potter The Weasley Talk

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"Listen Harry," Bill said in a very serious tone. "We called you here to have a little discussion.. about Ginny."

"What about her?" Harry said, his voice faltering just a bit.

Bill gave him a very intimidating look. "We just don't know if you're right for our little sister," he said grimly. "We don't want to see her get hurt again."

There was a chuckle from just behind Bill, and then a laugh.

"You called me down here for this?" George asked in an incredulous voice. "I mean really? To bully Harry?"

"Well.. Yeah, I mean, she's our little sister, we've got to watch out for her!"

George walked over and placed his arm around Harry's shoulder. "Young Harry, Fred and I discussed your budding relationship with Ickle Gin-Gin at great lengths and I can tell you, on behalf of my dearly departed, greatly esteemed and dashingly handsome brother that you have the full and unanimous blessing of the Weasley twins."

Ron stepped over to Harry's other side. "That goes for me too," he said. "No one I'd rather see her with."

"But... but we have to..."

"Does Ginny know about this?" asked Percy.

"Well no," stammered Bill. 'But it's our duty to..."

"Then I fear I must stand with George and Ronald," declared Percy, stepping over to stand by George. "If only to avoid Ginny's wrath, if nothing else."

"Ginny's wrath?" asked Bill, incredulously. "What's she going to do about it?"

"Percy's right," Charlie said grudgingly. "I reckon when Ginny hears about this, you're a goner."

"Not to mention when Fleur finds out that you're _standing in ze way of true love!_" said George in a poorly executed french accent.

"But... but Fleur doesn't have to know..."

"So you want me to break Ginny's heart _and _I lie to her about the reason why?" asked Harry. "If you want me to break up with her again, I owe it to her to tell her the reason why," Harry paused. "Because_ Bill_ told me too!"

"Blimey!" cried Bill. "I'm a dead man!"

"Come on," George said, holding out his hand to Bill. "Join us, we can't afford to lose another brother."

"That's not funny, George," Bill said quite seriously. "You shouldn't joke about Fred like that."

"Bill," George said, just as seriously. "If you think Fred wouldn't approve of a good joke, then you didn't know him like I did."

"He has a point, Bill. No one knew him like George," added Percy. "Fred would've gone to any lengths for a good joke."

Deciding that arguing was a losing proposition, Bill just shrugged and held out his hand to Harry. "Welcome to the family," he said with a sigh. "I hope you know what you're getting yourself into."

Harry took Bill's hand with his customary lopsided Grin.

"Honestly, Bill," continued George. "What were you going to do to Harry if he tried to resist? You do know that this is the bloke who just offed the old Dark Ding-Dong, right?"

Bill shrugged and pushed his hands into his pockets. "Well I just thought that..."

"George is correct, William, Trying to gain Harry's compliance through threat of physical force was a very poorly thought out plan," added Percy.

"Bone headed, if you ask me!" Charlie chimed in.

"Erm... Harry?" said Bill nervously. "Could we not tell Ginny about this?"

"Not tell Ginny about what?" asked the petite firebrand herself, having just walked into the room.

"Your brother," George enunciated as he pointed at Bill. "Was trying to bully young Harrikins here into staying away from a certain young red-haired princess whom our reluctant hero happens to be in love with!"

Ginny turned a dark glare on Bill. "You. Did. _What?_"

"Look, Ginny I..." Bill was interrupted when he backed into a futon and fell in the floor. "I was just kidding," he stammered, still backing away from his sister, who stalked towards him while drawing her wand.

"I... Ginny, please!" said Bill, with a look of terror on his face. "MUM!" he finally screamed.

Molly Weasley appeared almost instantly. "What's going on in here?"

"Oh thank Merlin!" cried Bill. "Mum, Ginny's threatening me!"

Molly turned to an obviously furious Ginny. "Well?"

Ginny knew that her mother was demanding an explanation. She also knew that her mother wouldn't make up her mind until she had that explanation.

"He was threatening Harry," she said darkly. "Trying to make him break up with me!"

Molly turned back to Bill. "William," she began. "I ..." Molly's words were cut short by her attempt to suppress a chuckle, and then another. Soon she burst out in fits of laughter.

"Mum!" cried Bill. "Come on!"

"I'm sorry, darling," Molly finally managed. "I don't mean to laugh, it's just that... Well I mean... It's Harry for crying out loud! He's the most powerful wizard alive and you're threatening him? That's hilarious!"

"But you're my mother!"

"And I'm quite proud of you, dear, but let's be realistic!"

For their part, the rest of Molly's sons were rolling on the sofa and chairs in unbridled peals of laughter.


End file.

Harry Potter, Humor