Fairy Tail 1. The Fanfic

I'm back again. This was another unplanned project of mine. Actually, it's sort of a rant in the form of a fanfic. And so, I shall welcome any flames I get and eat them like a delicious plate of sushi (if that makes any sense to you). I just had to get this off my chest. My hubby is tired of listening to me rant and rave about the unfairness of it all and is currently looking forward to what people will have to say about this fanfic. I sort of am too, as long as nobody finds my house and eggs it or something. After much ranting and writing (and more ranting and word-vomiting) I came up with this plot bunny. I thought to myself, if I'm irritated with how the NaLu fanfic universe has been going lately, I wonder how the members of Fairy Tail would react to it. And this was the result. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: If I owned Fairy Tail, I swear this story would be an OVA.

Breaking the 4th Wall of Cliche

Chapter 1: The Fanfic

_Click, click, click click click, _the little contraption on Lucy Heartfilia's brand new fourth-wall breaking device was being used to its fullest, as she furiously tapped on it. She had to admit, it was strangely addicting. What had the shopkeepers called it again? Oh, that's right, a _computer. _It was powered using the magical powers of the user and it was boasted that it could connect to supposed alternate dimensions... or something of the sort. However, there was a huge price to pay in order to receive knowledge of the multi-verses. It could drain a person's magical power to dangerous levels within an hour or so, give-or-take. One could only be on it for a little under an hour before needing to rest for several hours. And so, in her excitement and curiosity, she had invited several others from the guild for a little party. As they were all curious about her newest source of entertainment, they didn't waste any time in obliging her with the added magical boost that she was going to need. The only thing she had been slightly nervous about was Natsu and his knack for destroying things, but with Erza there to keep him in line she figured it would be all right. After clicking once more, a new site popped up on the screen. "Oh, hey, this is interesting. huh? Apparently people write stories about books they've read and stuff like that."

"Really? Lemme see!" Natsu eagerly shoved past Lucy.

"Hey, wait, Natsuuuu!" The mouse clicked on something and she found herself on a new page. "Thanks, now I have no idea where I am or what I'm doing." She began reading whatever new items that were on this next screen. "Hmm... Naruto, Inuyasha, Hetalia, Bleach... umm..."

An iron grip clamped down on his shoulder and Natsu looked up to see Erza's look of death upon him. He gulped and laughed nervously. "S-sorry... bout that..."

Luckily for him, Lucy's gasp drew the swords woman's glare away. "Fairy Tail? What!?" Wasting no time, she clicked on the category.

Erza was over her shoulder in an instant, Natsu's transgressions forgotten. "What does it say?" She demanded.

"Uh... h-hold on, hold on it's loading..." Lucy stammered under Erza's impatience. When the page had fully loaded her eyes widened. "Oh, wow... My name's on this story. Erza, your name's on this one! There's one about Levy-chan, too!" Her eyes scanned through the list of stories. "Hmm... Nalu? What's a Nalu?" She glanced at the others in confusion.

"Oh, the answer is right here." Levy had stepped through and pointed down at the page. "Nalu, Natsu and Lucy. Ohhh... it's a story about both you and Natsu as a couple?"

"A couple? You mean as a couple of teammates? Uh, duh, we already are teammates," Natsu quipped with a chuckle.

"No, Flamebrain, couple as in boyfriend and girlfriend!"

"Eh!?" The Stellar Mage shrieked. "D-don't just _announce_ it out loud like that!"

Happy chuckled evilly. "They liiiiiike each other!"

"Shut it, cat!" Lucy jumped up to throttle the Exceed. When she turned around, Natsu had taken her place and was clicking furiously on the mouse. "_Hey!_" She snapped indignantly and shoved the Dragon Slayer out of the way.

"Stop hoggin it, Lucy!" Natsu whined. "I wanna see one of those boyfriend girlfriend stories."

A blush tinted her cheeks. "Y-you do? Why?"

He laughed. "Because, I bet a weirdo like you would be a complete klutz when it comes to dating and stuff!"

"Like you're one to talk," the Celestial Spirit Mage huffed and scrolled down on the page.

"Actually, I think you should look up some of those stories with you and Natsu!" Mira urged. "I bet they would be soooo cute!" She was practically dancing back and forth at the thought.

Levy put a hand on Lucy's shoulder. "Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing it myself." She giggled.

Blushing even more, Lucy relented. "Oh, fine... though why no one is actually kind of creeped out that random unknown people are writing stories about us is beyond me." She read through some of the stories and their subtitles. "Umm you guys want me to look up a... uh... _Nalu_ story, right?"

Lisanna came up behind her. "Yes! I think it'd be cute," she said with a wink, only to add to Lucy's further embarrassment.

"Oh... good grief..." Lucy groaned, wishing that she could disappear through the floor right then and there. Suddenly, the computer party idea didn't seem like such a good idea after all. "Ugh, fine... Hmm... let's see... Nalu, Nalu... umm... here's one! It says, 'Lisanna's return! Lucy is forgotten and kicked from Team Natsu...' Well that's weird. And it has quite a few reviews."

Natsu snorted. "What a dumb idea for a story. That'd never happen, anyway. Let's look for a better story. I mean, who would get an idea like that anyway?"

Lisanna bit her bottom lip. "Yeah, it doesn't seem like it would be very much in character..."

Nodding, Lucy continued her search, a frown starting to form on her face. "Umm, 'Lucy gets kicked off the team after Lisanna returns. She leaves Fairy Tail and joins Sabertooth.' Uhh... 'Natsu kicks Lucy off the team...' Oh and another one."

"Well," Lisanna offered, "maybe it's a really good idea because it's so popular? Look! Those type of stories are the ones that really seem to get the most reviews. What do you think? This one seems to be written by someone named zOMGNaluLuver4evah101."

Natsu scratched his head. "Wow, that's a mouthful."

"I... guess," Lucy said, dumbfounded. "Maybe it's one of those types that you have to read it fully to enjoy it." She clicked on the one Lisanna pointed out. "Well, let's give it a shot. Apparently it's a one-shot."

"What's that?" Natsu piped up.

Levy interjected, "A one-shot is a shorter story with only one chapter."

"Oh, okay, good," Natsu said, grinning. "Reading gets boring for too long."

The Stellar Mage just rolled her eyes at him. "Whatever, let's just get this over with."

* * *

><p><em>It was a beautiful day in Magnolia. But it was anything but beautiful to Lucy Heartfilia, who was feeling lonelier than ever. You see, ever since Lisanna had come back from Edolas two months ago, everyone in the guild had been ignoring her. Even Natsu and Happy, who were supposedly her best friends. She sighed sadly and readied herself to go to the guild once again. "Today will be different! Maybe Natsu will talk to me today!" She said hopefully. Lucy put a fake smile on and headed on over to Fairy Tail. Once she got there, she saw Natsu, Happy, Erza, Gray and everyone else huddled around Lisanna, begging for her attention like it was going out of style. "Hi guys!" She said, hopeful for some sort of reaction. Nothing. <strong>Oh, well, <strong>she thought. **It's not like I expected anything else from them.** _

_Suddenly, to her surprise, Natsu in all his fiery glory decided to grace her with his presence! She smiled excitedly and waved. "Natsu! Hi! Are we going on a mission today finally? Because you know I've been soloing so many missions lately and I've been having a rough time of it. Somehow I'm able to solo the tiny missions but I hardly have any time for anything else because I'm barely making rent with these low paying missions."_

"_Ah, yeah... about that Luce..." He grinned like he were telling her that she won the lottery. "We decided to kick you from the team. Lisanna's back and you were just replacing her this whole time even though I never left any hint of it before now. So now she's come back to take her spot back. Hope that's okay."_

"_Oh sure," Lucy said, the phony smile on her face. "Of course I'd be happy about it. You have your childhood friend back and I'm sure that she's a whole lot stronger than I am. It's only natural that you'd want Team Natsu back to full strength."_

"_You got that right! Awesomesauce, Luce! Toodles!"_

_She waved him off with a fake smile plastered on her face while she was dying inside. She hid in the corner and put her head down on the table allowing the tears to start falling. "Natsu... minna... why?"_

"_Because he likes me more. Thanks for taking up the reigns for me, but now that I'm back, you can get lost now, bitch." Oh, great. There was Lisanna again. The only one in the guild that paid attention to poor lonely Lucy and she was also the one who picked on her the most._

_She sighed and turned away. "You got what you want. Why don't you just go away Lisanna. You already won them over."_

_But of course that wasn't enough for Lisanna. She had to make everything harder for Lucy. Instead, she started bawling her eyes out like Lucy had just told her there was no Santa Claus (sorry if I ruined it for you, kiddies, but at the age of 13+ I would hope that you know the truth by now). "Waaaahhh! Waaaaaahhh! Lucy, how could you do something so horrible to me?"_

"_What the crap?" Lucy snapped. "What's your problem now?"_

"_Lucy!" Natsu yelled, rushing over to the evil Take-over Mage's side. "How the hell could you do something so awful to Lisanna!"_

"_What!?" Lucy cried. "I didn't do anything! You don't even know what's going on! Don't I even get a chance to give you my side of the story?"_

"_Shut the heck up!" Natsu shouted, backhanding her._

_Poor Lucy fell to the floor with a cry. "B-but... Natsu... I... I thought..."_

_Soon everyone else's eyes were on her. "Lucy, you should be ashamed," Erza could be heard, shaking her head in disappointment._

"_Lucy is not a man!" Elfman announced as if it was a shameful thing that she wasn't a man._

"_You shouldn't be so mean to my sister," Mira scolded._

_Even Gray was shaking his head in disapproval and glaring down coldly at her. She would have laughed at the fact that he was trying to appear so serious as he was standing before her completely in the nude, but she was too busy feeling sorry for herself._

_And Lisanna was cackling wickedly as she hid behind Natsu. "Yes, you should leave, Lucy. Get out of here. Nobody wants you."_

_The sobbing Celestial Spirit (haha that sorta rhymes) Mage got to her feet shakily and ran out of the hall. "Master Makarov! Master Makarov!" She cried as she raced to the guild master's office._

"_Lucy! What is the matter!"_

"_I have to leave Fairy Tail! Everyone is being mean and I can't take it anymore!" She held out her hand waiting for him to take her mark off._

"_Of course child. I'm sorry, I've been watching for the past two months like a useless oaf and haven't done anything to help you out. I will give them all a good talking-to."_

"_No, no, don't do that," Lucy begged. "I don't want them to feel badly. Also, I want the readers to know just how long it will take them to notice that I've been gone so please don't say a word."_

"_All right, for you, and for the drama of this fanfiction, I will do as you ask, Lucy," the guild master reassured her as he took the mark off her hand. "But remember this: you are always welcome at Fairy Tail my child." _

"_Thank you," Lucy said before putting on a random black hooded cloak and slipping out of the guild, somehow being unnoticed by the angry mob that had chased her into the guild master's room. She raced to her home and took all of her belongings out. "I know what I will do," she said after she had finished. "I will go and join Sabertooth."_

_~TIME SKIP~_

_It had been six months and Natsu decided that he was finally sorry for being such a jackass. And not only that. He hadn't seen Lucy around and as the saying goes, 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' and so now he was totally head-over-heels for Lucy. "I have to tell her how I feel! I love her so much! I know I backhanded her before, but she has to know that I thought she had hurt Lisanna! After all this time though, I finally realized what a two-faced piece of work she is and that my only love is Lucy!" He looked around the guild again for Lucy. "Hmm maybe she's gone on a mission."_

"_Natsuuuu~!" Lisanna hopped up onto his back. "I missed you!" She giggled all sweetly-like._

"_Oh, uh, hey Lisanna," Natsu said, faking a grin at her. He carefully set her down. "What's up?"_

"_Oh nothing, I just was hoping you were up for another mission," she said, pulling on his arm._

_His grin faltered for a second but he put it back in place. **Ugh I don't want to be stuck on another mission with her again. She's so annoying... **"Well, uh, maybe later. I gotta go do some stuff... and things."_

"_I understand! Just let me know when you're done. We'll go as soon as you get the chance, 'kay?" She waved at him and ran off._

"_Whew, dodged that bullet. Oh, yeah, what am I doing? I gotta go find out where Luce went!" He ran to the guild and entered into Makarov's room. "Hey, Master, can you tell me where Lucy went? I haven't seen her in forever!"_

"_You little brat!" The master's huge fist came down and slammed the Fire Dragon Slayer into the floor. "Six months after you chased her away and you only figure out now that she's missing? No wonder she left! She's been long gone and joined Sabertooth now."_

"_What? When? And how did you know?"_

"_To answer your questions in order, one: she left. Two: six months ago, don't you listen? And three: how else do you keep in contact with someone? By post, you idiot!"_

_Ignoring the master's obvious sarcasm, Natsu got to his feet. "Luce... I'm so sorry for ignoring you and chasing you away... but don't you worry. You might be happier in Sabertooth because they are probably treating you better than we did, but I'll ignore your feelings once again and drag you back with me because of my own selfish reasons." And off he went, running nonstop until he saw Sabertooth's doors. He burst into the guild. "Lucy!" He called, looking around excitedly. But what he saw next shattered his poor heart to pieces._

_There was Lucy and she was with Sting (le gasp!) and they were both sucking face. The couple broke apart at the sound of Natsu's voice. "Natsu?" Lucy looked surprised. "Why are you here... uh..." She looked up at the calendar on the guild board. "Six months after I left Fairy Tail?" Her glare demanded an explanation._

"_Wow, Luce, really? Sting? You were **that** desperate?" He sighed. "Well, anyway, I realized that I really love you. So come back to Fairy Tail, okay?"_

"_You think it'll be that easy?" Sting sneered. "You all don't deserve Lucy. She came to me and was crying the night you guys dumped her for that crazy Lisanna chick. You're not getting her back. Over my dead body!" He stepped forward. "Lucy, get behind me."_

"_Fine by me! I'm fired up!"_

_Lucy clasped her hands in front of her in worry. "Sting... Natsu..." It was at this moment she realized, though she was grateful to Sting, she really truly loved Natsu Dragneel. But she knew better than to step in between two battling Dragon Slayers, so she kept quiet and stood to the side._

"_Fire Dragon's Roar!"_

"_White Dragon's Roar!"_

_In one attack it was over. Natsu was victorious. He grinned over at Lucy. "Lucy, I love you. Will you ever forgive me? I'll never treat you that way again."_

"_Oh, Natsu, I love you too. Don't worry, I will forgive you for anything because apparently the author wants to turn me into some stupid twit who goes back to an abusive relationship, so..."_

"_Natsu! There you are! What are you doing with that stupid wench?" Lisanna had come up on the scene from nowhere. "Who the hell do you think you are, you slut!?"_

"_Hold that thought," Lucy said. "Lisanna, let's settle this."_

"_Okay, weakling. Give it a go! Take-over magic!"_

"_Urano Metria!"_

_Again, in one hit it was over and Lisanna lay sprawled out in a bloody heap on the ground. "W-why...?" She mumbled before passing out._

"_Okay, Luce, let's get going."_

"_Okay!" Lucy smiled happily up at Natsu. She turned back to the rest of Sabertooth and Sting who lay on the ground half-dead. "Well, guys, how do I say this? It's been real and it's been fun but it ain't been real fun. Ciao!" She erased the Sabertooth mark and left with Natsu to come back to Fairy Tail._

_So it ended on that happy note. Lisanna left the guild in shame because she was such an awful person and Natsu and Lucy got together and lived happily ever after, even having 33 babies just as her daydreams had suggested!_

_THE END_

_FIN_

_Eh, whatever they say._

_REVIEWS_

_Poopmaster5000_

_So awesomeeeee pleeease update pleaaase!_

_Flarpledoodle_

_Aweeeee so cute! Glad Lisanna got what was coming to her what a jerk! Nalu 4 ever!_

_Guest_

_It was so good, please write more._

_Gigglefarts_

_Yayayayay! Nalu Nalu! So happy for them and their 33 babies!_

_Tiddlydinks_

_This is the best fanfic ever!_

_Anonymous Reviewer_

_Glad Natsu came to his senses and glad Lucy forgave him. You had me worried there! What a good dramatic build up though. I'm glad to see that b!tch Lisanna is gone. _

_SadSappySlurpie_

_What a happy ending! Keep on writing!_

* * *

><p><strong>Author's notes:<strong>

Ahh, that felt good. Good for starters, anyways. More to come, rest assured. Keep in mind I'm merely expressing my opinion, and so you are welcome to do the same.

What got me started off on this rampage was one day, I was scrolling through some NaLu fanfics. I happened to notice, like every single page was one of those cliche fics. I even read a couple. Now, I guess if you want to go the OOC route and everything, I suppose they are passable. Maybe even good. But if you are looking for some good old fashioned, let's keep the characters IC they are definitely not what I was looking for. And so, starved for romance fanfics, I decided to check out a few other fandoms and see what they were all about. I happened to come across a nicely written NaLi fanfic in the mix. And *gasp* the writer wasn't Lucy bashing, either. But boy, the NaLu fans let the poor author have it. And that made me incredibly angry, and wanting to lash out somehow. And thus, this rabid plot bunny was born.

Now, don't get me wrong. I am a **huge** NaLu fan. I love NaLu. I eat, sleep and breathe NaLu. It is my OTP, forever and ever and ever! However, I am getting rather irritated at the lack of quality NaLu fanfics that are being written and passed off as masterpieces when they are nothing but copies following the cliche "Lisanna returns, and Lucy gets ignored and kicked off Team Natsu." Now, one or two fanfics I understand, but now there is literally at least two of them per page. What's worse is that people **know **that they are cliche. They're writing that in their story captions. So if you know it's going to be cliche then why write it?

I don't agree with any of the plot, and I don't even see it being plausible. First off, Natsu wouldn't, nor would anyone else forget about Lucy for any reason. Second, most stories seem to depict Lisanna as this complete witch, which I find totally unfair to the character. She is really a sweet, kind and supportive girl. For crying out loud, she practically gave Lucy her blessing to stay by Natsu! So why are there so many Lisanna haters?

I totally respect NaLi shippers, even if I don't agree with the pairing. Honestly, I would rather read a nicely written NaLi fic, than a character-bashing NaLu fic. Just saying. Anywhoo, leave a review if you like. Or if you want, let the hate flow through you and flame me. -halliegirl

P.S. Natsu thanks you in advance for the yummy flames. He says he can't wait to gobble them up.


	2. The Reaction

I'm back! *DRUMROLL* dadadadadadada... And now for the highly-requested (but already intended) reactions of many of our favorite Fairy Tail members! Thank you, thank you, I know I'm awesome~ *dodges a tomato* Okay, now seriously, story now, talk later. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: So that OVA hasn't come out yet. Must mean that I still don't own Fairy Tail. Pity.

Breaking the 4th Wall of Cliche

Chapter 2: The Reaction

* * *

><p>The room was completely quiet after Lucy had finished the story. "Uhh... what the hell did we just read?" Gray asked, being the first one to break the uncomfortable silence. "And who are these people reviewing and why the hell do they like this garbage!?"<p>

"I didn't even get one line in the whole story!" Happy wailed.

"Seriously, cat? _That's _the only thing that bothers you about this!?" It was meant to be a question, but it kind of came out like a shriek because of how mortified Lucy was feeling at the moment. It was so... so... _asinine. _The feeling was like... you know when you sit down to watch a television show and it takes an unexpected turn to something really ridiculous and awkward and just downright humiliating, making you wish you'd never tuned in to that show? Then at that exact moment, someone sits down beside you and starts watching, making you wish that you could sink into the floor and disappear from the room? Yeah? Well, multiply that by about a hundred, and that would explain what Lucy was feeling.

Natsu, who was silently seething, finally found his voice again. "What in the... where's the jerk who wrote this!?" He demanded, raising a flaming fist into the air. "I'll go right to his house and set him straight! Why the hell would he write me doing that!? I'd _never _treat Lucy that way! And 'awesomesauce!?' _Really_!? Who even says that!?"

"Natsu..." Lucy trailed off but then realized that she needed to calm him down before her house went up in smoke. She put a soothing hand on his shoulder and smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, Natsu."

"But they said-!"

She shook her head at her partner. "This is what _I'm_ saying. That writer has everything all wrong. It's like they know nothing about us." Lucy pulled back when she saw Natsu visibly relax.

Soft whimpering could now be heard coming from Lisanna. "L-Lucy... Lucy..." She cried, before tears started spilling down her cheeks. "Do I really treat you that way?"

"N-no, of course not! You're one of the nicest people I know!" The Celestial Mage answered, waving her hands frantically in front of her. She was trying to act as damage control, but found that the task was beginning to overwhelm her. Not to mention, Lucy herself found it difficult to console the others when _she _was feeling just as upset as they were about this whole mess. Apparently thousands of people far off in a distant dimension saw Lucy Heartfilia as a simple-minded, weak and pathetic female who seemed to prefer being the codependent in an abusive relationship and hopped from one guy to the next on a whim. Peachy.

"I don't understand. Why are people writing me so mean-like?" Lisanna shook her head before collapsing into more tears again. "I-I didn't do anything bad, right...? So why do they all hate me?"

Lucy reached forward and caught the crying Take-over Mage in her arms to comfort her. "Shhh... Lisanna, I know you're not like that. It's okay, just let it out... There, there..."

Erza cleared her throat in an attempt to regain her composure before speaking. Her voice still came out slightly strained. "I wouldn't take this story too seriously. It's dripping in sarcasm."

"What's that?" Natsu asked, anger momentarily forgotten. "Is it something to eat?"

"Umm..." Mira's voice was shaky as she tried to sound normal. She giggled nervously and clasped her hands together, totally bewildered by what had just been read to her and not knowing quite how to react yet. "I don't think you can eat sarcasm, Natsu..."

"Oh, too bad. I'm hungry, too."

Lucy sighed. "What else is new?"

Levy had remained oddly quiet throughout everything, simply chewing on her lower lip, looking slightly flustered. Gajeel noticed and clapped her on the back. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, I was just going over the structure of that person's writing style. It's such a shame." She paused, glancing around. When she realized that all eyes were on her, she continued. "There are a few errors in punctuation, the story is quite rushed, and the plot is poor and unoriginal... however, the errors are few and far between. Simply put, this person would have a lot of potential to write something amazing if they actually put forth some effort into it as a writer."

"I see what you're saying," Lucy responded. "I didn't catch anything spelled wrong. If they had tried to use their imagination, even just a bit, they could have come up with something better than this. It's a shame. It almost looks like they're following a trend or something, and going for popularity and reviews instead of trying to use their full potential as writers. It's... really kind of sad, if anything." She sighed. "Well, whatever it could have been, for us it was a waste of time."

"I'll say," Natsu agreed. "Hey, something _else_ bugs me about this story, too."

Lifting a curious eyebrow at her teammate, Lucy questioned, "Really? Like what, Natsu?" If she knew Natsu, she knew that he didn't like to read much of anything at all, so if he had any questions or critiques toward anything to do with literature, Lucy was definitely going to indulge him.

"Well they make me call you 'Luce' all the time. Isn't that a little weird? I just call you 'Lucy' or 'weirdo' don't I?"

Nodding in understanding, the Stellar Mage murmured, "Well, yeah, now that you mention it..."

"I guess it's not a bad nickname for you though, Luce," he said, grinning.

"_Please _don't call me that," Lucy groaned, slapping her palm against her forehead. "It's a horrible reminder of this moment which I would love nothing more than to forget!"

With a concerned glance at her sister, Mirajane turned to the others. "Though this is a problem. I don't think it's very nice for people to write things like that about my sister. Especially since it isn't true. I would like to have a word with this person myself, if I could." Even though she stood there, seemingly composed and gently tending to her younger sister, there was no mistaking the menacing glint in her eye.

The blonde mage frowned, nodding in agreement. "You're right. I think I'm going to write a letter... er..." She glanced at the computer screen, squinting. "_E-mail_, I guess is what it's called, and ask them if they would kindly refrain from writing these things in the future."

"I don't get it." Natsu raised an eyebrow. "What would make people think Lisanna's like that?"

"I don't know, Natsu," Lucy answered, still frowning. "But I'll do what I can to ask them to stop."

"Hey! I got an idea!" Natsu's face brightened up. "What if we _all _write one of them letter-mail thingies? That way they'll have to stop!"

Lucy snorted. "You mean an _e-mail_?" She corrected with a smile.

"Yeah! That!"

"Hmm... that could work," Lucy said thoughtfully.

Finally, a tiny smile was starting to appear on Lisanna's face and she wiped away a tear. "Do... do you really think it will work?" She asked hopefully.

Natsu grinned. "Yeah! It'll work."

"I think so too, Lisanna," Lucy said, smiling encouragingly at the Take-over Mage as she hugged her again and gave her a reassuring pat on the back. "Don't worry, we'll show them all how sweet you really are!"

Levy came up to join the hug. "I'll do my best too."

"If it'll help any, I'll write one too," Gray offered.

"Gray-sama, your clothes," Juvia pointed out. She then turned to Lisanna and the others. "Please tell Juvia if there is something that she can do to help."

"Only a real man like me can write one of those!"

"We can each write one! We'll right this wrongdoing!"

After a few more cheers and shout-outs, Erza stood up. "Then it's decided. Those who want to help will write out a letter to this author and Lucy will send it. Just write how you feel about that person's writing, and how you felt they handled everyone in the story."

"Oh, almost like one of those reviews?" Levy asked, pointing at the list of reviews on the screen. "What if each of us reviewed that person's story?"

The blonde's eyes brightened and she flung her arms around the blunette's tiny frame. "Levy! You're a genius!" She turned back to study the computer screen. "Then we'll all sign up to this website and see if we can't fix this."

Lisanna sniffled, managing a smile through her tears. "Th-thank you Lucy, everyone," she murmured.

"Of course," Lucy exclaimed heatedly, standing and facing the Take-over Mage. "There's no _way _that any one of us is going to stand here and simply allow these injustices! As a writer, no, as a member of Fairy Tail, I simply cannot allow this!"

"I'm right with you, Lu-chan!" Levy reached forward and clasped one of the blonde's hands into both of her own. "We'll do this together!"

"Well let's get started! I'm all fired up!" Natsu lifted a flaming fist above his head.

"H-hey! Watch where you're swinging that! Oh, no! Not my desk!"

After rushing to put out the flames around Lucy's desk, they all proceeded to get started on their responses to the fanfiction. First, they had to think of names.

Lucy went first. She attempted 'Lucy Heartfilia' but it was taken of course. So she tried 'LucyHeartfilia', figuring that maybe she could take the spacing out and use her name that way but to no avail. Several other combinations of the name proved fruitless too. Apparently there were a ton of fangirls who were obsessed with her name. On one hand, Lucy was flattered, but on the other hand, she was getting annoyed and slightly creeped out. Finally she settled for the ridiculously long name of 'TheRealCelestialMageLucyHeartfilia'. Sighing in dismay, she shook her head and turned to the others. "Okay, who's next?"

"Me! Me!" Natsu shouted, eager as always. He practically shoved Gray out of the way as he plopped down beside Lucy.

"Uh, okay, Natsu. What name would you like?" Lucy asked, getting ready to sign him up.

"Natsu Dragneel!" He answered simply, the exasperated expression on his face implying that what he was saying should have been obvious.

Lucy shook her head. "That name has been taken. Same as mine."

"Hey, I have an idea. Excuse me for a second, Lucy," Gray said politely as he settled down beside Lucy. When she moved to allow him space, a sly grin appeared on his face. He started typing and then clicked the confirm button. "There you go, Natsu. Fits you like a glove."

"Hey, what the...? WHAT!? Change that now, you perverted popsicle!" Natsu lunged at Gray after seeing what he had typed into the screen.

"Umm... you can't change it now. It can't be that bad... 'NatsutheFlamebrainedIdiot'... Uh, well I guess... moving on now."

"Aww, come on Lucy! I didn't even get to pick my own name and you're just gonna leave it like that?"

"I'm sorry, Natsu, there's no helping it," Lucy said, scratching the back of her head nervously. "Okay, Gray, you're up now. What name would you like?"

"Well, let me think-"

"Outta the way, Lucy!" Natsu shoved the Celestial Spirit Mage out of the way cackling maniacally. A few taps of the keyboard and a click, and he was finished. "Ha! Well now, 'GraythePervyStripper,' looks like I'm not the only one with a stupid name!"

"You fire-snorting jackass! That does it! I'm gonna-!"

Erza clamped a hand down on both of their shoulders. "You're gonna _what_?"

"Th-that is... I'm gonna thank you for that wonderful name. Thank you, buddy," Gray laughed nervously, sweat building up on his brow under Erza's death stare.

"And you, Natsu? What do _you_ have to say?" Erza demanded.

"Uhh... th-thanks, Gray! I couldn't think of a better name myself! Best of friends, that we are!" Natsu stammered, wrapping his arm around the ice elemental mage.

"Good," Erza said, turning away from the two terrified mages and turning her attention back to Lucy. "If you wouldn't mind, Lucy, I would like to sign up next."

"B-by all means," Lucy laughed nervously, having seen the death stare she'd given Natsu and Gray. "Here, have a seat." She vacated her spot and motioned for Erza to sit down. "It's pretty easy to sign up, so here you go."

After some deliberation, Erza was able to come up with a name for herself. ErzaTitanniaScarlett it would have to be.

Lisanna went next, as she was part of this whole mess and felt that she should have a say in how people were treating her. She settled for the name TheRealLisannaStrauss.

And then others went. HappyFishFinder, LevyMcReader, DemonicMiraJane, JuviaLovesGraysamaForever, IronFistDragon, LoverboyLoki and ElfmanlyMan to name a few. One-by-one, those that wanted to participate signed up and it was agreed that they would use Lucy's computer to share their feelings on what they had just read. However, time was ticking away and Lucy was all but drained of her magical power, having used the device for far too long. And so, they agreed to reflect upon what each of them wanted to say for a night and return the following day to begin posting each person's feedback.

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><p><strong>Author's note: <strong>Something that I do want to address quickly before anything else. I know one person mentioned something about how I didn't add any bad grammar to that 'story' in last chapter. I have two reasons for this:

(1) I purposely messed with some of the punctuation in the story. If you squint, maybe you'll be able to see what I mean. And even doing this drove me nuts. I _hate _typos, mistakes, errors of any kind (By the way, if you see any, please by all means feel free to correct me! Seriously!) and

(2) My other reason (also the main one) for this is because there are quite a few 'well-written' cliche stories and those are the ones that anger me the most. In this chapter, Levy and Lucy sort of touch on this and it's a very _sore _point for me. I've read more than one of those dumb cliche fics. Some of them are written so badly that I understand _why _the person chose to write the cliche. It could have been beyond their ability to do anything else at this time. However, there are some cliche fanfics that, with how they are written, you can tell that the author is capable of so much _more_. The grammar and spelling are perfectly fine, even the style of writing just seems to flow. Putting such wonderful writing styles and trying to fit them into that cliche should be a crime. It's equivalent to shoving a work of art into a steaming pile of dung. If you have the talent, spread your wings! Don't waste your potential on some pathetically overdone, cliche, dried up husk of a badly stereotyped storyline just because you are simply too lazy to think up a real plot or are just looking for reviews. BE ORIGINAL! And that's all I'll say about that.

To be honest I was almost disappointed that there were no flames, because I was looking forward to making a few extremists angry, but there's always next chapter! That being said I'm actually very happy to know that in the midst of zombified NaLu fans there are still bright glimmers of hope. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart. All of you!

Anywhoo, from here on out, the narration will end and now will focus on the reviews from the different characters until further notice. The updates will be slower, because I am currently stumped as how to write some of the reviews for these guys, but I'll eventually figure it out. Anyway, you know the drill. Let me know how you liked it. Also, I'm up for suggestions on who should review first. So review away! Reviews make me happy, and Natsu's hungry for some flames.

Laters, peace out~ hallie


	3. NatsuTheFlamebrainedIdiot

Disclaimer: Since there's still no OVA out about my rant, I guess I still don't own FT. Damn.

Breaking the 4th Wall of Cliche

Chapter Three: NatsuTheFlamebrainedIdiot

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><p><span>NatsuTheFlamebrainedIdiot<span>:

ddddddddddddaaaaaa

ddddaaaaaammm

ddammmit11!111 thisss stori suuckkksss aas baaadd ass thhiss thingggg! aand yuu madde llissannaa cryyy soo youurrr gonnaa bbeee eaatinggg aaa fllaaameefiiiisstt sanddwich ween i'mm donne withhh yuuuu!11111!111!

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><p><em>Anonymous<em>

I must apologize for the earlier review right above. My friend who had just reviewed is new to a computer and couldn't get the keys to work right, so he was getting frustrated until I stepped in to help. I'm going to be, um, for lack of a better word 'translating' what he wants to express to you about this fanfic and its flaws:

"I don't like this story. It isn't how any of us act at all. It's like you know of us, but you don't know anything about us. We're like family, and none of the things in that story would ever happen. I'd never lay a finger on Lucy, and Lisanna isn't a horrible person like she was described either. While we're on the topic, you owe Lisanna a huge apology."

So I think it would be in your best interest to apologizedkdfaopaoi;'jkdfa; dka;;;;ja;jfk;e orrrrr ill fiindd yyuu aannd giivee yyoouu thatt flaaamefiist saandwiich1111111!

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><p><em>Anonymous2<em>

I must apologize once again. He kind of took over the keyboard. He's pretty... umm... upset, or maybe borderline psychotic about this still and so he's been put out of commission for the time being. Anyway, as I had been trying to say before I was so rudely interrupted by my impatient friend, I think it would be in your best interest to apologize to Lisanna. That's all I have to say for now. I should probably go before he burns this computer and the rest of my apartment down. Thank you for your time and goodbye.

Oh, and P.S.

Natsu does NOT say 'awesomesauce.'

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><p><span>Author's note<span>: Guess who finally decided to crawl out from under her rock. I guess a lack of new quality fanfics for me to read once again provided me with the inspiration to continue. Thank you for the reviews. Honestly I never thought that this fanfic was going to have so many. I was just raging over what I had kept reading. It makes me so happy and gives me hope for the Fairy Tail fandom to see so many positive responses to this, though. Even if you don't like the story, if you even somewhat agree that the cliché fanfics are bad news, I'm just happy that my thoughts are being shared.

On that note, I'm sorry about the length of time it's taken to post even this, though it's short. These review chapters are mostly going to be short from here on out, though. Just a heads-up. Honestly, I'm terrified of getting them out of character in the reviews, but I just decided that I would write how I believed they would to respond to a fanfiction like that. That, and I hadn't been scrolling through the fanfiction section until lately and started stumbling on the cliché fics once again. I guess in a way, you kind of have to thank those cliché writers for this update, because that was what spurred it on.

So I guess if you could find it in your heart to leave a review or flame, I'd much appreciate! I love feedback, good or bad!


End file.

Fairy Tail, Humor, Parody