Bleach Loneliness

**Title: Loneliness**

**Author: FactVsFiction**

**Pairing: Nanao/Stark Friendship, Shunsui/Nanao**

**Rating: K+**

**Disclaimer: I don't own bleach.**

**A/N: Wrote this one months ago. Bit strange and not up to scratch really but intriguing enough to be posted nonetheless… Review!**

Stark rolled an eye open lazily as he as he heard the door of his cell open. He'd been in there four days now and this was the first time somebody had actually entered. He found himself mildly interested. It was probably that weird guy with the makeup who'd poked and prodded him the day he was brought in, he was probably up for dissection. Stark found he really couldn't bring himself to care.

His eye landed on the petite figure of a woman and the other eye opened in surprise.

She had black hair pulled back in a perfect roll. Her skin was like porcelain and indigo eyes were hidden by tasteful frames. She moved with pure elegance across the cell to place the tray she carried on a table in the corner. She was like a breath of fresh air in his monotonous surroundings.

"You know most of them just put it through the flap." He said lazily.

She didn't start at the fact that he was awake, just turned to face him.

"You'll find I'm not like most people."

"I can see that already. He pushed himself up, rubbing his face tiredly. I haven't met you before. Who are you?"

"Ise- Nanao. Lieutenant of the eighth division."

"Why's a lieutenant delivering my gruel? Surely you've got better things to do with your time. That captain of yours is probably a handful. Unless of course it's going to be your pretty hands dissecting me." He flopped back down.

"I don't allow the dissection of eighth division prisoners of war. Be thankful, you'd already be dead otherwise."

He just shrugged his shoulders.

"Still doesn't explain why you're here to see me. You had nothing to do with that fight. Weren't even there."

"I'm here to keep you alive. As ridiculously unintelligent as some people are I am well aware of the fact that you're hollow. You need reiatsu to survive."

He sat up suddenly, pushing heavily to his feet and approaching her. She didn't even cringe. There was no fear in her eyes.

"I don't scare you."

"I'm the best kidou artist in seireitei I don't need a blade to protect myself from you, especially when your powers are tied."

"Fair point." He commented.

He watched as she picked up a tray of rice balls and held a hand over them, allowing her pure energy to gather before running it into the food. Her reiatsu was the purest he'd ever come across and he felt his mouth begin to water. He hated that. Hated the hollow part of him that caused such a reaction. This was the first person who'd spoken to him in four days. He didn't want to eat her.

She cut off the flow of power at exactly enough to see him through the next two weeks. It was a very small amount in honesty. She knew what she was doing.

"Shinigami reiatsu is far purer than what you're used to and my kidou ability makes my own far more potent than even that of a normal Shinigami. That is enough for two weeks, correct?"

He nodded.

"Eat. I'm not going anywhere."

"Doesn't that freak you out?"

"Not really. I'm head researcher on the espada. Besides. I haven't given you soul, it's just reiatsu. It will replenish and holds no connection to me. It's just life firing a kidou spell."

"If you say so." He said, plonking down. He had to stop himself wolfing the energy saturated food. He may as well savour it. He'd never receive energy so potent again.

"Why weren't you at that battle. You weren't in los noches either. I would've sensed you."

"I chose to stay behind and run defence here in seireitei."

"You knew Aizen'd attack here too. You know…" He said, tossing another rice ball into his mouth thoughtlessly. "You may think I know nothing about you but I know what you are. You and that captain of yours are the inversion of each other. He's a damn sight smarter than he's given credit for and you're a damn sight more powerful than people think."

"How'd you work that one out?"

"You reiatsu is quiet as a mouse. Your captain might not have told you but I don't exactly go throwing my power about either when I have it.

"Ah. You're correct. The eighth is somewhat the squad for the underestimated."

"Did your captain tell you what I am? What all the espada are?"

"The ten reasons people die. You're loneliness personified."

"You're keeping me company so I don't die."

"I am. Do you miss her? Your fraccion disappeared when your powers were sealed."

"We're different from you lot. I can't miss her emotionally, that's heart. On a practical level yes I do. Linnette was quite literally the reason I'm alive. The answer to my loneliness. I can miss her in that sense. I will die without her eventually, no matter what you do."

Nanao simply nodded.

"I don't know why your captain didn't kill me. He knew what would happen me."

"Taichou doesn't kill." Said Nanao simply. "You're far to human for him to lay blade to you in murder."

"I'm a hollow."

"He knows that. I know that. But you can sit here and talk to me. You lack a heart but you miss on a primitive level. You have a personality… Characteristics… self control. You're far more human than Aizen has led you to think."

"I get you."

"Pardon?"

"I've gotten you since you walked in here. It's written all over your reiatsu, your body language…"

"What is?"

"You're a lonely soul." He said simply.

This time she did start.

"You've got no family, no close relationships, you're distant. I scare you because I'm going to die. You want to know if you'll die without your captain. He is to you as Linnette is to me, just with emotion, right?"

She nodded, very slowly. Her pallor was ghostly now in the light of the cell.

"There will always be embodiments of the aspects of life and death. You got the crappy end of the deal. Trust me I know that. But hey that's life and you live with it. You got a damn good aspect of life in that captain of yours. Don't waste it."

"H-hai. Thank you Stark."

"Hey, a life for a life. You've extended mine, even if you can't save it."

Nanao rose to her feet and headed for the door.

"Nanao."

She turned back at the call.

"Please… Don't let me die alone when it comes."

"I won't."

OoOoOoOoOoOo

Shunsui watched his lieutenant with understanding over the next few weeks. Plenty of eyebrows had raised when she'd taken over the duties to the first espada but not Shunsui's. Even before he'd ever crossed blades with stark he'd sensed it. The first espada's reiatsu was tinged with the same feel of his Nanao's own. It had almost broken his heart to learn what it was. Pure loneliness. It petrified the captain, that something so strong could live in Nanao but he'd had to admit that it made perfect sense. Upon realising Nanao's connection he'd began paying closer attention to the traits exhibited in the reiatsu of those around him. Apart from Nanao though, the only other person he could attribute a death trait to was Aizen in the form of Nihilism.

Nanao had always been an incredibly solitary figure. She did her own thing, was misunderstood and kept to herself. Shunsui had realised quickly what Nanao had known instinctively. Linnette was the reason Stark lived and taken away he would die his lonely death.

And so he didn't comment, when Nanao took on his troubles. Turned a blind eye when she gave him the reiatsu to extend his life as much as was possible. He knew what she was up to. Shunsui had never ever experienced true loneliness but he figured that dying alone must be the deepest fear to a person like them. Stark couldn't appreciate her presence emotionally but her physical presence must soothe and Nanao would not let him die alone. It must frighten her to watch him fall apart, see what she could become… Somewhere in him Shunsui liked to think that he was his Nanao's anchor to life and he silently swore he'd never leave her willingly.

It was almost three months later that Shunsui received word that Stark had finally reached the end of the line…

OoOoOoOoOoOo

Nanao entered the cell late in the night. She could just see the body of the espada she'd come to think of as a friend in the moonlight. A guard had come to wake her the moment the man had started to go into distress. It was three in the morning. She crossed the cell silently before sitting down on the edge of his futon. He wasn't in good shape, his body seeming to quake even in his restless sleep.

He cracked an eye open at the disturbance.

"Nanao..?"

"Shhh." She soothed. "I promised I'd be here."

"You're tired."

"It doesn't matter." She said simply, she lifted his head and resettled it on her knees. "I'm here."

They stayed that way for a few hours, Nanao absently stroking the hair from his sweaty brow. He held her other hand tightly in his. She knew the only way she could comfort was with physical presence. His quakes had intensified a few hours later and he'd fallen into delirious dreams, a product of his fever. Still Nanao didn't leave him though.

"Nanao."

She looked down to see unfocused eyes on her.

"I dreamt. Hollows… We don't, we can't dream… Why?"

"They were fever dreams, they're different." She soothed quietly.

"I think… I think I understand something now."

"You shouldn't be talking. You'll waste energy."

"No. You need to listen." He insisted weakly.

"Love. Is it the strongest emotion. The most potent?"

"I would consider it to be, yes."

"I can't fight the loneliness." He gritted his teeth. "I can't fight because I can't feel anything else but you. You can. You can fight. Let him love you. Let yourself love him like I know you do and you'll feel… You'll feel other than loneliness. You said. You said that that a broken heart can die of loneliness and I don't understand that… But if you love him and he dies you die like everybody else. Of a broken heart. If love… If love is the most potent it will override the loneliness like it can't for me. Do I make any sense?"

Nanao nodded, tears running down her cheeks.

"You make sense Stark."

"Nanao… Please… I know espada can't be purified but please… try. I don't want to be lonely anymore… I want to feel."

Suddenly his body went into convulsions. She held his head steady as he thrashed violently. He stilled suddenly, and she could sense his body shut down. She felt it fitting… he was killed by what was essentially a heart attack. His face had smoothed now, the pain lifted from his features at last.

Knowing instinctively what to do Nanao put her hands over the hollow hole and focused.

OoOoOoOoOoOo

Shunsui watched in awed silence as both occupants of the room glowed a brilliant gold. Slowly the hollow hole began to fill beneath her fingers, once completely full the still body burst into brilliant gold spiritual particles. He wasn't all that surprised that she'd managed it. His Nanao could do anything she set her mind to…

She sat, staring at her empty knees for over a minute before looking up at her captain. She rose and in two strides he was across the room, enveloping her in a tight hug.

"I won't leave you." He murmured into her hair. "I understand."

"Thank you." She whispered into his chest, her small hands fisting the fabric of his haori, physically anchoring her.

_Thank you._


End file.

Bleach, Friendship, Hurt-Comfort