South of Nowhere 1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

SPOV

Oh God why do Friday nights have to be so unbelievably busy. I'm always sent to the store room to get more beer. Ever since I started working for my friend Jess at her bar Moon over 4 years ago I've been the one to make the trek to get more beer and spirits. Jess claims it's so it doesn't look like I get preferential treatment but I get free drinks, extra pay and a place to live above the bar. Nah no preferential treatment here Jess. I chuckled to myself thinking of my crazy but loveable best friend.

Jess and I met when I moved to New York at 18 for college; I literally blew her away during a horrible wind maker accident in central park. Jess was swept into a giant puddle while the actor I was supposed to be filming lost his wig in the gale force winds I couldn't seem to stop. One coffee, two donuts and a spare t shirt later we were fast friends and I've never looked back.

Jess is 27 and used her inheritance to buy an old diner which she converted into an amazing bar slash performance venue. Moon's open mic nights are unbelievably popular with recording execs often stopping by to listen to whomever Jess has talent spotted this week.

I grabbed the beer and some more vodka (May as well save myself a trip later) and hurried back to the bar. I emerged through the swinging door at the side of the long cherry wood bar Jess is so very proud of and stopped in my tracks. The bar had become absolutely packed within the 5 minutes I was gone and there was a weird buzz in the air that went above and beyond the usual Friday night chatter.

I put it down to the performer that would be taking the stage at 11:30pm tonight. Glancing at my watch I saw it was only 10:15pm and I wondered what all the people were doing out, it's still hella early. Just as I finished restocking the fridges I saw Jess bouncing my way, she looked flushed and happy, not her usual stressed out manager self, now I'm confused. Just as my train of thought ended Jess called out to me.

"Speeeeenceeeeerrrrr Caaaaaarrrrrrlin" She sang as she reached my side.

"Jess what on earth has gotten into you?" I asked still shocked at her mood.

"Spence my oldest most amazing friend what makes you so sure there's something going on."

Now I was suspicious this was just bordering on psychotic for Jess, she was usually focussed and stressed at work, Moon is her baby and she is the perfect pushy parent. I couldn't help the curious tone my voice held as I replied.

"Jess, seriously tell me, did you get laid or something?"

"Nope Spence but Moon just went up by a million cool points in New York's nightlife." She said with a grin.

Now I know New York is a competitive place and I couldn't figure out what would make Moon such a popular place in the 5 minutes I was in the damn store room.

"C'mon Jess tell me." I whined. "Did we get an awesome review or something?"

Jess beamed at me with the biggest smile I have ever seen on anyone ever and practically wet herself with excitement as I waited to hear the big news.

"Nope even better, come here." She said and pulled me forward so she could whisper in my ear.

"_We have a celebrity in the house tonight Spence." _She whispered so quietly I almost didn't hear her.

"Who Jess?" I asked wondering who could get Jess so worked up.

"_hashladamas_" She spoke so fast I didn't understand a word.

"Jess speak English, **slowly**" I was getting impatient now and the crowd at the bar was approaching 3 deep.

"Fine Spence I'll just say it, ok breeaaathe" She blew out a big breathe, such a drama queen.

"Jess" I warned.

"Spence, it's Ashley Davies, she's _here_." She practically screamed into my waiting ear.

Shit. Fuck. Damn. Mother. Of. All. Fucks. I froze faster than a banana in liquid nitrogen. My head swam and I thought I might faint. It wasn't that Ashley Davies was famous, it was more to do with the fact that Ashley Davies was my ex-girlfriend and my first love. We met in junior year of High School, formed what we thought was an unbreakable bond and once I admitted to flying the rainbow flag, she asked me out.

Long story very, _very_ short we fell madly in love, grew apart then broke up painfully at the end of my senior year. She dumped me for her career and we went our separate ways, me to the Tisch School of the Arts in New York and her to a record label in LA.

"Big fan huh Spence." Jess said.

I broke out of my depressing train of thought to see Jess staring at me in the weirdest way. I'd made sure no one knew who my ex was and as far as I know my selfish ex has never admitted to ever having a long term relationship with anyone, let alone a commoner like myself.

"Yeah, not _really_, just excited for you Jess" I prayed she wouldn't see through me.

"Ok, you just look like you've seen a ghost that's all."

"No no, I'm fine Jess just saw the queue at the bar is all." I said trying to distract Jess from my pale face.

Jess turned and did a double take when she saw the thirsty crowd around the bar.

"OH MY FUCKING GOD," She screamed, "WHERE ARE ALL MY BARTENDERS?" She turned on me then.

"SPENCER, get to freakin' work I'm gonna go call Tom, Jamie and Alex we're gonna need all hands on deck for tonight."

She sprinted to the back room to phone for help and I stepped up to the bar and began to serve the hundreds of punters, some of whom were less than pleased at my lack of enthusiasm for life. I steadfastly refused to let my eyes wonder past the customer I was serving. Not for any reason, I just like to focus. "Yeah keep telling yourself that Spence." I thought as I served beer after beer all the while ignoring my heart pounding every time I saw a brunette in the crowd.

Finally after nearly an hour the crowd had thinned and I was able to leave the bar for my break. My friend Natalie was due to perform in only twenty minutes so I decided to visit the green room to give her some encouragement before her big moment. In reality I just wanted out of that bar area the thought of my ex was getting to me a lot more than I'd like.

As I approached the room behind the curtains I heard two girls talking ridiculously loudly.

"Oh my gawd can you believe how hot she is in real life Han?" Nasally voice numero uno squealed.

"I **know**, I think I'm in there hunny, I'm sure she winked at me when she was signing my bra." I hated numero dummy onsite, I got angrier as I got closer, their voices were so irritating.

Numero uno gasped, "What about me biatch maybe she'll like me I am brunette after all, everyone knows she hardly ever takes home a blonde." My chest became uncomfortably tight at the mention of Ashley's type. I knew all too well how much Ashley didn't like blondes.

As I got closer I saw they didn't have passes, I breathed a sigh of relief, I could make them go away.

"Excuse me ladies I don't think either of you have backstage passes could you please return to the main area before I have someone escort you out." I smirked at their shocked faces as they turned and retreated back the way they had come. I heard the door to the bar swing shut and I walked into the green room. I paused on the threshold not sure what I was seeing.

"H-h-hey Spence, how's it goin'?" Natalie said weakly from her position on the floor against the sofa opposite the makeup station. She looked more nervous than I'd ever seen her.

"Nat, what's the matter, you're not even dressed?" I said shocked, Nat was usually warming up right about now.

"I can't do it Spence, she's my hero, my idol, I have posters of her and concert tickets for her show next week."

I groaned internally, some prat told Nat about Ashley's presence tonight. I knelt down in front of my dear friend.

"Nat listen you are one of the best unsigned acts in the country everyone cannot wait to hear your soulful voice week after week, you cannot let one crush make you lose your world famous mojo."

"Spence its _Ashley Davies_," Why does everyone talk about her like she's some sort of deity? I was pulled back to reality by Nat sobbing into my shoulder. Wait, when did she start hugging me? I rubbed her back gently.

"Nat she is just another stuck up singer with too many hangers on and no real life." I tried not to sound too invested in what I was saying, but I could've said a lot worse. Nat just stared at me.

"Spencer Carlin how can you say that, her first album went quadruple platinum her second and third went double, she has won more awards than any other artist in years **and** she's a successful producer." She sounded incredulous at my lack of amazement so I decided to try a different tack.

"Producer eh, well maybe you should warm up, go out there and do what you do best because Nat, you could be spotted tonight." I waited to see whether it would work.

Nat's eyes glazed over and she tensed in my arms. She let go of my shoulders and backed out of my embrace and I finally saw the huge smile threatening to break through. I breathed a sigh of relief as my friend returned to normal or as near as she could get right now. Nat jumped up and went to grab her guitar before catching a glimpse of her tear stained, make up free face in the mirror.

"Oh shit Spence I'm not even dressed and I haven't warmed up at all, what the fuck am I gonna do I go on in," she glanced at the clock on the wall, "13 minutes?"

I realised just how desperate I would be if my dreams hung in the balance and I only had 13 minutes to get ready so I pulled myself together. I jumped up and pushed Natalie into the changing area.

"Ok Nat get dressed and fast into whatever you were already planning on wearing, then bring your jewellery out with you to makeup, you can warm up while I do your hair and makeup." I said quickly thanking god I work best under pressure, I always leave the hardest assignments until I only just have enough time to complete them and make my deadline.

Five minutes later Nat was nearly ready and hyperventilating into a paper bag while I straightened her long black hair. Nat's Hawaiian so she has the most amazing coffee coloured skin and sleek black hair; if she wasn't like a sister to me I would definitely ask her out, the girl is hot.

Tonight she was in a tiny black jean skirt paired with a black wife beater with the most amazing silver beading all over showing off her gorgeous body toned from hours of surfing. She'd also put almost twenty bracelets on one wrist and a black leather cuff on the other. She looked amazing, her makeup minimal but enough eye liner to make her eyes pop, they draw you into her seriously. I did a double take when I saw the clock, only 4 minutes till 11:30, Jess was going to kill me I'm supposed to be serving, my break is so over.

"Nat you look amazing now let's get you to the stage." I said actually feeling nervous for my friend; this was a big moment for her. I just wish my heart wasn't betraying me by skipping a beat every time I thought of the reason for my friends nerves.

She stood and crumpled the paper bag before lobbing it into the bin on the other side of the room, I couldn't help but be impressed, the girl's got skills. I handed her her guitar and we made our way quickly to the curtain at the side of the stage.

"Nat I love you but I have to get back to work, good luck I know you'll be amazing." I said as I hugged her goodbye.

Nat didn't say anything back but she has a zone for her performances so I wasn't overly concerned. She nodded and turned to the curtain, I forced myself to smile at her before hurriedly returning to work.

As I began serving the last minute drinks before Nat's set I had the sudden urge to look up, as soon as I did I regretted it because right opposite my place behind the bar was the one person on the planet I would do anything to avoid seeing.

There she was Ashley Davies, sitting calmly in one of the raised booths sipping a bright green cocktail and chatting with someone opposite her. I don't know how long I was staring for but the world faded away around me as old emotions came rushing up to greet me. Shock, sadness, jealously and finally anger. I held onto the last one as I remembered everything that girl put me through, our whole relationship played in perfect HD in front of me down to the final moments.

_**Flashback**_

"_Spencer please it's not as if there are no good colleges in LA you could do you degree or whatever here." Ashley said waving her hands around in frustration._

"_Ashley Tisch is my dream school you know that." I shouted._

"_Dreams change Spence, your dreams can come true in New York or LA mine can only be in LA why are you making this so hard?" She said in a strained voice._

"_Ashley I love you and we can still have a relationship if I'm in New York." I tried to stay calm but I was getting angrier by the minute._

"_NO we can't Spencer if you leave then I have no one to go anywhere or do anything with, how will I share this with you if you're on the other side of the country?"_

"_Ash you can take Kyla, Aiden or Madison to parties, you've had no problem not taking me for the last few months anyway."_

"_What's that supposed to mean Spencer?" Her eyes narrowed at me._

"_What do think Ash, that you never invite me out, you signed a god damn record deal without even telling me you'd been offered one?" I was shouting now. "Then you have the audacity to ask, no, tell me I have to stay in LA so I can be your little pet girlfriend for the media, how can you be so selfish?"_

"_Oh I'm the selfish one Spence, you're the one leaving and giving up on us." She was nearly crying now._

"_How can you say that Ash I'm not giving up I'm following my dreams, I love you why would I want to leave you I'm just following my dreams. Just. Like. You. I'm still yours I'll always be yours, distance doesn't matter." I said the last part so softly trying to get across to her how much she meant to me._

"_If you are willing to abandon me just as my life starts to get better then YOU ARE NOT MINE Spencer."_

"_Oh right so your life was so bad before Ash, love just isn't enough for you IS IT?" I screamed._

"_No Spencer your love isn't enough!"_

_My eyes went wide and I welled up as she said the words I knew were true. I took a step back towards her front door. As she just looked at her feet._

"_Fine Ashley I understand perfectly now, you clearly don't want me in your life anymore and you know what. You're a useless, selfish piece of shit and if I never see you again it will be too soon. I can't believe I wasted two years of my life on someone who won't even let me live mine if it doesn't suit her. I hate you we're done." With that I turned and walked out of the still open front door slamming it behind me._

_**End Flashback**_

She never came after me, I thought I wanted her to but after a few weeks of no contact I saw her on E! News giving an interview for the release of her single. I thought she looked tired, she was smiling but it didn't touch her eyes, then I heard the reporter ask her if there was or had ever been someone special in her life that she loved. My ex then proceeded to tell the world she had never been in love and only her sister Kyla and her deceased father were her loved ones.

I cried for days before realising that if two years meant nothing to her then it meant nothing to me. I flew to NYC the next week and I haven't been back to LA or seen Ashley since. If her songs come on I turn them off, same goes for the TV and magazines.

"Fine," I thought, "I'll act like she does I can act like we never had anything." I vowed that if I was forced to interact with her tonight I would remain completely indifferent she never loved so she didn't deserve to know she's hurt me either.

Still while I had her in my sights I couldn't help but check out her toned legs, perfect arms. No, bad Spencer. Aw what the hell I'm only human, my ex is hot she's never going to know I checked her out anyway.

With that comforting thought I got back to work cleaning and restocking the bar as Jess introduced Nat who proceeded to wow the crowd with her beautiful voice. I met Nat only 6 months ago but she is already so special to me, she moved to NYC from Atlanta to try and get signed and Jess gave her a spot at Moon every Friday.

A few execs had talked to Jess about her but I don't know why Nat hadn't contacted any of them yet. I know there's something holding her back I just can't work out what it is, maybe tonight will help. I smile at the thought of Nat's crazy personality which showed in the best way on stage. As she sang an acoustic version of gives you hell I couldn't help but sneak another look at you know who across the bar.

**APOV**

"Kyla why did you make me come here there are so many better clubs and bars in New York we could be at, this place doesn't even have a VIP area for christsake." I love my sister but her taste just confuses me sometimes, if she wasn't such a good publicist I would not be here tonight, she has a reason for everything she makes me do.

"Ash please just chill there's a girl playing tonight, she's had offers from almost every major label but hasn't accepted any, apparently she's off the hook." My sister smirked at me; she knows how to push my buttons, I was intrigued.

"Off the hook huh, what's her name?"

"Natalie Freznie." She replied.

"Interesting name, when's she..." I stopped speaking when I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise and a shiver run down my spine, I hadn't felt that shiver since. Oh for god sake I really wish I could go one night without thinking of _her._ I shook my head and looked towards the bar.

"Ash...ASH."

**Ok so just let me know what you think, thanks.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

"Ash...ASH."

"Hmm, yeah Ky?" Damn the crowd was getting bigger around the bar again and my drink was almost gone. You couldn't even see the damn bar or a waiter. I turned back to Kyla propping my head on my palm.

"Ash you stopped mid sentence, did it happen again?" She sounded more worried than usual for some reason.

"Yeah Ky but it was different this time, it was like she was actually next to me, it's getting worse again." I sighed and moved to fiddle with the stem of my cocktail glass looking into the green liquid that would be helping me to forget tonight.

"Oh Ash maybe you could look her up, at least see if she's happy, you never know she might be the same as you." She pleaded with me once more.

Ever since I lost _her_ it's been like this, every day something will spark a thought or memory and I'll be dragged back to my immature 18 year old self making the same stupid mistakes. I can't even look at a blonde without my chest aching unless I'm hammered and the smell of vanilla makes me want to cry.

The media thinks I sleep around and sometimes I do, I just have to get drunk enough first. Even drunk I only take home brunettes. I just hope none of my 'conquests' ever sell the real story to the press.

Then again I'm sure Ky's paid them off and made them sign something official, ah the life of a rockstar. I saw Kyla eyeing me suspiciously and I realised I had spaced out, I shook my head to clear it.

"Ky it's been six years she didn't feel the same back then why would she feel the same now?" I tried not to let the pain I was feeling show in my voice.

"Seriously Ash you regret not going after her everyday why don't you do something about your pain? You're being ridiculous." She said frustrated at my resistance. In my opinion I deserve to be in pain.

"Ky just drop it, I'm sure it's just this city, she lives here so I'm probably just a little on edge, I just need to vent, write a few songs ya know?" I looked up to find Kyla smirking at me.

"Ashley Davies how do you know she who shall not be named lives in New York still?" She said triumphantly. Shit I did not realise I had let that slip, cover quickly Davies.

"I just assumed because Glen hasn't ever talked about her being in LA when she's mentioned, that's all Ky." I waited to see if she bought my line of bull. She leant back in her seat and smiled smugly at me.

"Uh **huh**, sure Ash, anyway I need another drink."

"Oh yeah sorry Ky I couldn't even see through to the bar when I looked, I'll go in a bit though."

We both turned to face the stage as the music faded to nothing signalling the act was about to perform, we had a perfect view from our raised booth, thank god for celebrity treatment especially if this girl is as good as Ky says.

We watched as a tall red head sashayed onto centre stage and introduced herself as Jess the owner, I focussed in as she brought out this Freznie girl. My first thought was wow, I couldn't help but admire the girls outfit, it showed off her toned body to a T and her eyes were mesmerising when she looked out into the crowd from her stool at the mic. I had to force myself to listen when she spoke.

"Hi guys and girls," she spoke with a soft lilt in the perfect pitch as she continued to tune her guitar; she must have a good ear to do both simultaneously. "I'm Nat and I'm gonna play you a few songs if that's ok?"

She looked down bashfully as the waiting crowd cheered her, they obviously loved her they were enthralled and she hadn't sung one note. I saw Ky leaning forward eagerly awaiting the first song and found myself doing the same but trying to be subtle about it, reputation remember.

"Thanks I appreciate it, well I better not keep you all waiting," she shuffled herself around readying herself to sing, "this song is a new one I've had in my arsenal for a while, I wrote it when I left home for a very dear friend I hope you like it."

I saw her take a few deep breaths before strumming a beautiful chord progression, then she started to sing.

_The smell of your skin lingers on me now  
>You're probably on your flight back to your home town<br>I need some shelter of my own protection, baby  
>To be with myself and centre<br>Clarity, peace, serenity_

Her voice was stunning; I couldn't get over its breathy quality, the song left me speechless.

_I hope you know, I hope you know  
>That this has nothing to do with you<br>It's personal, myself and I  
>We've got some straightenin' out to do<em>

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket  
>But I've got to get a move on with my life<br>It's time to be a big girl now  
>And big girls don't cry<p>

She picked up the tempo perfectly the tone of the next progression allowing the emotion in her voice to shine through.

_Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry_

The path that I'm walkin', I must go alone  
>I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown<br>Fairy tales don't always have a happy ending, do they?  
>And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay<p>

I hope you know, I hope you know  
>That this has nothing to with you<br>It's personal, myself and I  
>We've got some straightenin' out to do<p>

I wished I could go out and buy her song it really touched me.

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket  
>But I've got to get a move on with my life<br>It's time to be a big girl now  
>And big girls don't cry<p>

Like the little school mate in the school yard  
>We'll play jacks and Uno cards<br>I'll be your best friend and you'll be mine  
>Valentine<p>

Yes, you can hold my hand if you want to  
>'Cause I want to hold yours too<br>We'll be playmates and lovers  
>And share our secret worlds<p>

But it's time for me to go home  
>It's getting late, dark outside<br>I need to be with myself, and center  
>Clarity, peace, serenity<p>

I hope you know, I hope you know  
>That this has nothing to do with you<br>It's personal, myself and I  
>We've got some straightenin' out to do<p>

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket  
>But I've got to get a move on with my life<br>It's time to be a big girl now  
>And big girls don't cry<br>Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

As she finished her song I could barely breathe through the emotion that song threw at us. I looked at Ky only to find her staring straight at me already.

"I told you so Ash, what are we going to do about her?" I blinked stupidly realising what my lil sister actually wanted me to do.

"Ky I told you already I can't take that step yet I haven't done enough ground work." At that moment Nat started another song on stage so I held my hand up to silence Kyla's reply and closed my eyes to listen to the rest of this girls set, one artist to another.

She blew us away, it was that simple and I would gladly duet with her hmm maybe I could arrange that.

After her set finished and the DJ began to spin I decided it was time for my new drink to appear.

"Hey Ky I want a fresh drink you goin'?" I said. She just looked at me angrily.

"Ash you said **you** would go this time, remember I'll go in a bit etcetera?" She huffed. I knew my status would get me nowhere with my irritating spatula of a sibling so I just got up.

"Fine I give same again Ky?"

"Yeah thanks Ash."

I proceeded to make my way across the main floor space skirting around the dance floor that had formed in front of the Dj onstage. Choice is yours was blasting out over the club rocking the whole floor with the bass, this guy could really spin. He was layering everything perfectly keeping the crowd completely out of their own minds.

It took me over twenty minutes to reach the bar at which point I must've already signed about 200 autographs, I refused pictures though I was not in the mood to smile goofily at random cameras tonight.

I leant against the gold rail running around the edge of a very expensive looking bar and let my eyes close blocking out the world for a few seconds.

"Oh my gawd I can't believe I'm at the bar with the Ashley Davies." I opened my eyes to find the source of the most nasally voice to ever invade my thoughts.

I found myself looking at an orange with eyes. No joke, this girl had been tangoed or something and it took all my self control not to laugh in her face. Across the bar I caught sight of Kyla laughing her ass off at my situation in the booth. I looked back at the orange one who was still squealing with excitement.

I eyed her up and down, hmmm not bad obviously desperate, brunette overall too easy but if I needed some company later or a dance partner she might be perfect.

Out of the corner of my eye I suddenly spotted a blonde barmaid changing out the vodka bottle behind the bar. Even in my peripheral vision I could tell this girl. No. Woman was insanely hot. Short black shirt and black dress shirt making her figure one of the best I'd ever seen and this was just the back of her.

Gah here comes the chest pain, I have not had enough alcohol to handle a hot blonde let alone one as hot as her. I closed my eyes against the tide of emotion threatening me and tried to pull myself together. Ashley Davies does not cry in public.

I vaguely heard the Satsuma on legs ask me for an autograph and forced myself to reopen my eyes and concentrate on the brunette to avoid looking at the blonde again. I grabbed the piece of paper the girl was offering only to realise it was a headshot. She was even more orange in the picture, I just stared at her incredulously she really wanted me to sign her face, her **face**.

I was just signing the _back_ of the picture when I heard a voice that literally made my heart stop and my world crumble.

"Hi Gareth you want the usual tonight?" _Her _voice was smooth as velvet.

My neck nearly snapped my head span that fast as my eyes searched for the face I knew belonged with that melodic voice.

She was looking down at the beer she was opening for this Gareth dude thank god she hadn't seen me because I had no motor function at that moment my knees were threatening to buckle under the weight of my heart swelling.

I could hear the ocean in my ears and my chest nearly split in two as my heart ached for the blonde stood in front of my eyes for the first time in six years.

Any minute now she's going to look up and see me staring at her.

I heard zesty try in vain to regain my attention, I wished her luck trying to break me out of this waking nightmare. Wait. Maybe this could be one of those movie moments I hate so much when the two finally see each other again and they know everything's going to work out.

I drew blind hope from my thoughts and composed myself as her eyes travelled from the cap she was chucking out across the bar and up to my eyes.

That half second felt like a thousand years. My eyes dying to lose themselves in the blue they knew approached.

Blue finally connected with brown and I was immediately lost in those sapphire orbs. She looked breathtaking.

"What can I get you?" She spoke straight away with no hesitation whatsoever; damn, she must've seen me at the bar and had time to prepare the blank stare she was fixing me with.

I let out a huge breath I had no idea I was holding as I searched her eyes for any emotion that might signal even the smallest reaction to my presence. Nada.

I knew she didn't love me, I ruined my chances with her six years ago but a small part of me (it's red and squishy and trying to make its way towards _her_) still held onto the hope that she was just as hurt and lonely as me. I should've known I was the Queen of wishful thinking with that final thought I grew angry.

My internal organs were busy beating the shit out of each other when I finally managed to reply to her question. I was annoyed when my voice came out rough and angry.

"Two beers and an archers and coke _barkeep_." I drawled as I turned back to Pulpface with a sickly sweet smile on my face. I really need to see her react even a little to my presence so I tried a little of my old tricks.

"Hey sweetie how would you like a fresh beer from me?" I asked the girl, who looked like she was about to faint as I spoke directly to her eyes.

I heard the sound of two bottles hitting the wooden surface of the bar rather harder than necessary and I quickly grabbed one handing it to Fantaface without ever losing eye contact.

Now I knew I had the attention of you know who behind the bar I turned to grab my beer and Kyla's glass. I caught her eye again before running my eyes slowly up and down her gorgeous body her slight shift the only telltale sign I made her uncomfortable. I groaned internally, she wasn't even attracted to me anymore.

I stared into the blue depths on last time as I drove the final stake through my own heart.

"Put these on my tab," I winked suggestively at her still not eliciting a response, "I'm sure you know enough about numbers to do that don't you?"

_Finally_ a reaction, her eyes glazed over with anger when I made that dig at her mathematical ability, it was always her worst subject and a major sore point with her mother. I decided I'd done enough damage and swiftly returned to my booth ignoring any requests for autographs on the way.

"Hey Ash what's wrong?" Kyla said with a guilty smile, she must've seen what went down, that's when it hit me.

"Hang on, of all the bars, in all of New freakin' York and you bring me to the one place that has Sp... oh crap _her_ working in it. WHAT THE FUCK KYLA?" I still can't say _her _name properly, I'm pathetic.

They had done it again, ever since that drunken night in Melbourne five years ago _our_ mutual friends/relations have been trying to push us towards each other.

There was even a conference call that had _her_ and me at each end along with our siblings. Of course the second she heard my voice she hung up the phone, Glen called back to apologise but I had gotten the message; the same message she gave me in person when she ended our relationship six years ago.

"I'm so sorry Ash we thought seeing you would bring back all her feelings, Glen is sure she still loves you, so are Aiden and Madison."

"Kyla I don't care anymore, I was right our relationship meant nothing to her so she means nothing to me, I'm moving on starting now." For once I half believed what I was spouting, seeing the indifference in _her_ made me want to start living again. My own life that is, not the one she unknowingly controls.

I proceeded to chug my beer down and signal to a passing glass collector to get me another. He recognised me and sprinted to fill my order. I watched the dance floor and I realised which song had been playing as I saw _her_ again.

I turned to Kyla laughing before I sang along to the last chorus.

"_When you see my face hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. When you walk my way hope it gives you hell, hope it gives you hell. When you find a girl who's worth a damn and treats you well. Well she's a fool it's just as well hope it gives you __**hell**__!"_

The last thing I saw before I dragged Orangutan to the dance floor was Kyla burying her head in her hands and rubbing her fingers through her hair in frustration. Even I knew I was in hell.

**A sincere thank you to everyone who read the first chapter and especially to those who took the time to review.**

**The response was slightly overwhelming and has really motivated me to continue.**

**OneLiner: You will love Ch.3.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**SPOV**

"Stupid," BANG, "Fucking," THWACK, "Shit."

I finally stopped kicking and slapping the seemingly unbreakable door, breathing heavily I returned to pacing around my living room. I could still hear the music from the club downstairs reminding me I had to finish my shift. Jess let me take another break when she saw my face; she didn't even ask me what was wrong she just knew I needed a breather. I love that woman.

Why did I have to be so cold? For a minute Ashley actually looked like she was going to cry, maybe she wanted to be friends or some shit I don't know, she definitely won't anymore anyway.

Six years for six years I held onto the hope that she didn't really mean to hurt me and that she just got scared and didn't want to burden me with her bullshit. Well that hope was in vain huh. I thought back to the past 10 minutes ago and sighed.

When I saw her moving through the crowd to get to the bar, I couldn't help but watch her body sway gracefully in front of me, I accidently spilled a Guinness, that's how much she can still affect me without even knowing it.

As soon as she neared the bar rail the tide of emotion became too much for me to handle and I busied myself with the stupid (and full) vodka bottle I'd already changed, my back to her so I couldn't see her face. I knew I would break if I looked at her right then and for some stupid reason I thought I needed to be indifferent.

I tensed up so hard when I heard numero Uno's voice butchering her name and I actually had to bite back a growl when she asked Ashley for an autograph. It was at that point I heard a fist knock on the bar so I took the deepest breathe I have ever taken and span round to serve my customer.

I immediately saw Ashley was distracted with Uno (who I noticed was waaaay more orange than she had looked in the shadows backstage) and sent a silent thank you to the man upstairs for the small reprieve.

I managed to smile at Gareth but when I asked him if he wanted his usual I felt her stare. It burnt through my whole being and I found myself unable to concentrate on more than opening the beer. I knew I would have to serve her; she was next to Gareth, god damn it.

I snuck a peek at her as I lifted Gareth's beer to him without so much as twitching my neck. She looked dumbstruck and I saw her eyes were almost completely unfocussed, she had clearly spaced.

I actually nearly smiled at her shock when I finally shifted my eyes to hers (trailing my gaze across the bar first of course) but lost control of every muscle the instant brown grabbed blue.

It was that moment when a fresh wave of hurt flooded through me; I fought to keep my eyes clear and my face straight. Ashley always could read me like a book and I thought tonight would be no different.

I can't understand why she looked so devastated when I spoke, my voice hasn't changed but we haven't spoken properly in years so maybe she had embellished the memory and was disappointed with the real thing.

When she spoke with so much venom I thought I might actually cry but she was too busy trying to cop off with tango tits to even see my eyes well up. So I blinked the tears away and served her drinks, I'll admit I did try to get her attention when I practically smashed the bottles on the counter but it worked.

Right now I really wish it hadn't because I am still turned on from the look she fried my skin with. Damn I had almost forgotten the things that girl could do to my body. Then she winked, WINKED at me like I was just another notch on the Gibson and then used an ancient sore spot to piss me off.

Originally I was touched she had remembered my stupidity when it came to maths but then I remembered she was being a twat to me and I just glared at her. No come back or anything, I am useless at verbal sparring I'll have to work on it now though.

Six years is long enough, we should at least be able to have a conversation with each other without all this pain afterwards.

If there's one thing that's good about the situation downstairs it's that I know Ashley didn't walk into this bar deliberately trying to hurt me.

I watched her practically sprint back to her booth and rip her companion a new one. Ah I bet it was Kyla, Aiden or Madison those jokers have been bringing us around each other for years trying to spark some big sappy reunion. I wish they would stop, she doesn't want me and I'm in too much pain to want her.

When she dragged Uno towards the dance floor I couldn't watch anymore and I ran up to my apartment to... Well I'm not sure what I wanted to do, break down my own front door from the inside out apparently.

I chuckled to myself as I realised how unnatural my behaviour has been tonight, Jess already knows something's wrong, I just hope Nat doesn't see it, she has laser eyes and I'll spill the truth to her without even thinking first.

Finally I've stopped pacing, I'm done over thinking this. I'll just be myself from now on regardless of who I'm talking to. Meaning I will bitch back if I have to.

With this thought I was able to make my way slowly back to my post at the bar nodding calmly at Jess as I did so, I thought I'd gotten away with it but she reached out and grabbed my arm. That girl moves like lightning.

"Spence you looked so mad before, you ok?" She looked so concerned for me.

"Jess I'm all good just saw an ex that's all, nothing to worry about. I know we're better apart now." I said while forcing a smile.

"Spence even I think you don't believe what you're saying, chin up chick if you want her back it'll happen, for sure." Oh god if Jess can see me that easily Nat's gonna tear me apart in seconds.

"Jess for fucks sake I'm fine nothing's going to happen ever again so just **leave it**." I didn't mean for it to come out so harsh I just panicked. Her eyes went wide and the floor was suddenly fascinating to me.

When she finally spoke again she used her caring voice (yup she has one of those).

"Alright Spence I didn't realise you even had an ex I'm sorry, I won't say anything again." She sounded so hurt; she was only being my friend.

"I'm so sorry Jess I didn't mean to be so harsh it won't happen again." I reached out to hug her and was surprised when she dragged my whole body into her arms and held me tight.

"It's ok Spence but when you need someone to tell all these dirty secrets to I'll be the one at your door with wine and ice cream." I squeezed her hard when she said that into my ear, I didn't know I needed a hug so badly until I was in one.

When she let go of me she smiled and nodded towards the door to the bar. I smiled back and we rejoined the party in the club.

It's now nearly 1am and I'm about ready to collapse into my nice warm bed and just forget the drama for a while.

I have seen Ashley countless times tonight and each time she's had a different girl grinding on her, sometimes more than one. She looks half gone to be honest; I just hope she doesn't hurt herself tonight.

I around and saw Kyla smiling at me from her position in the booth, I sent her a smile and a wave just to show no hard feelings. Aren't I mature now?

Next thing I know Kyla's opposite me at the bar. She plonked herself down on a stool and just stared at me, not saying a word for the longest time.

"Soooo Kyla, how's things?" I gave in first but she was creeping me out big time.

"Pretty good, my sister's miserable though." Whoa direct much. My head snapped up.

"Sure Kyla, I know what you're trying to do and it won't ever work. Anyway Ashley does not look unhappy to me." We both watched Ashley grinding on some pretty brunette; it's bad that I want to be that girl right?

Kyla just shook her head at me watching Ashley and chuckled.

"Spencer you guys have some issues but if you would just talk about how you _feel_ you guys would be in bed in minutes."

"Kyla we don't want to talk to eachoth..." She quickly cut me off.

"Spencer you two don't want to **admit** you want to talk to each other, she loves you and you feel the same, don't you?"

I couldn't speak, did Ashley really love me. How could she act so angry if she loves me? Do I love her still?

I'm not ready to even consider all this so I just stayed silent staring at Ashley until she faded into the crowd on the dance floor.

When I looked back Kyla was nowhere to be seen so I got back to work cleaning the glasses. Occasionally I couldn't resist a look at the dance floor, I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help it, I used to love watching her move. I tried to shake myself out of it and vowed not to look again.

I was in the middle of pretending I was not going to look again when the music faded and DJ Josh (another friend of mine) spoke to the club.

"Hey guys, we have a big surprise for you tonight. Please welcome back Miss Natalie Freznie."

I watched as Nat strutted onto the stage to join Josh at his decks. He handed her a microphone and she addressed the crowd.

"Hey again, it's good to be back. Now Jammy and I have been working on a little duet for you and the boss lady has decided to let us entertain you with it tonight, enjoy."

I didn't even know Josh could sing so I couldn't **wait** to hear this.

"Oh and Spencer."

I narrowed my eyes at the stage as Nat addressed me across the crowd.

"I love you and I owe you big time for tonight so this one is for you, it's about you and me anyway."

She nodded to Josh and the drums kicked in with an amazing backing track.

Josh mixed in a strong beat and the crowd went wild.

_Oh Oh_

_Oh Oh_

_Oh Oh_

_Oh Oh_

_nonono_

Nat crushed the first note, she rarely belts it out but she was putting everything into this one. I've only ever heard her sing this powerfully in my living room to Shania or Christina. My hips began to swing of their own accord.

_Out on the weekend  
>Out on the weekend<br>Out on the weekend  
>Out on the weekend<em>

I wanted to jump onto the dance floor so bad right now it's untrue. Then Nat started to sing.

_Let them in, get the lights, let party begin  
>Mix a little love, get the mood jumpin'<br>From New York to Miami by ten  
>I think I'm ready to go<em>

High, every time that we hit up our spot  
>See everyone in line and they payin' a lot<br>Cept their payin' for the night  
>'Cuz the drinks are fixed but the music is free<p>

I felt a familiar pair of slender arms wrap around me from behind. I smiled at my new partner as she dragged me to the dance floor.

Jess and I began to dance crazily to the best song I've heard in a long time. Nat smiled down at us as she sang the next verse.

You want it, you got it, you need it  
>But you know you gotta have it, boy<br>The music is freein'

_(Out on the weekend, out on the weekend, weekend)_

Jesus Christ I was so into this song, Josh should be a producer.

_This is for the girls comin' from NYC  
>I'm feelin' you like you's family<br>And everybody down from LA to BC  
>Rockin' to the same old CDs<em>

This is for the kids in the clubs and the street  
>Talkin' 'bout you work three deity<br>Get on the dance floor where the music is free

I had my eyes closed now just moving to the beats as they changed and listening Nat's voice as she rocked out on stage. Suddenly I felt a pair of warm hands on my hips; my skin began to burn pleasantly as the hands dragged me back into the waiting partner. We started to dance together and it was the best I've felt in a long time. 

Slip, gone until the dawn's gone with me  
>Gone until the dawn's gone with me<br>Where the music is free  
>Slip, gone until the dawn's gone with me<p>

_(Out on the weekend, out on the weekend, weekend)_

_Now all my ladies  
>Move it to the front<br>Show 'em what you got_

I still had my eyes closed and my hands over my head allowing this person complete access to my body. They didn't take the bait so I just continued to move grinding into them occasionally. My whole body was burning with the contact, everything had left my head except for the song and my partners hands manipulating my hips.

Fellas?  
>Oh, like that<p>

All my ladies, all my ladies  
>All my ladies, all my ladies<p>

Me and my girl were now pressed so close together I could feel her breathe tickle my neck and her breasts against my shoulder blades.

I heard a male voice kick into the song, wow Josh has talent.

And all my ladies say  
>And all the fellas say<br>Everybody say  
>Come dance with me<p>

And they say we all dance like this  
>We have the men in bed and off<br>Till there mornin', there we go lettin' off  
>Tyler's droppin' onto the table top<br>Once again, you can shake your thang  
>And there ain't no cops<p>

I tried to turn to dance properly but her fiery touch prevented me.

This is for the girls comin' from NYC  
>I'm feelin' you like yous family<br>And everybody down from LA to BC  
>Rockin' to the same old CDs<p>

She leant forward even more and ran her hands up my sides and back down again as we danced.

This is for the kids in the clubs and the street  
>Talkin' bout you work three deity<br>Get on the dance floor where the music is free  
>Slip, gone until the dawn's gone with me<p>

My whole body was on fire as the song and my girl took me higher.

This is for the girls comin' from NYC  
>I'm feelin' you like yous family<br>And everybody down from LA to BC  
>Rockin' to the same old CDs<p>

Her hands were splayed across my stomach now, pulling me even further into her. I loved the feel of her fingertips digging into my abs.

This is for the kids in the clubs and the street  
>Talkin' 'bout you work three deity<br>Get on the dance floor where the music is free

Her teeth grazed the back of my ear and I shivered at the sensation.

Slip, gone until the dawn's gone with me  
>Gone until the dawn's gone with me<br>Where the music is free  
>Slip, gone until the dawn's gone with me<p>

_(Out on the weekend, on the weekend, weekend)_

The music stopped abruptly and before I could even open my eyes I could tell she was gone.

My body felt cold without hers and my ear still tingled from her touch.

I saw Nat smirking down at me and I just laughed up at her before blowing her a kiss. Mid catch Nat froze and stared at something behind me.

I whipped around to see Ashley glaring at me like I'd shot her. My breath hitched but before I could speak she took off towards the stage. She used one hand and leapt gracefully onto the stage. I thought she was drunker than that.

Nat was still frozen as I saw Ashley reach out a hand to shake. Nat caught my eyes and I nodded encouragingly, I was not going to let my personal issues interfere with my friend meeting her idol.

By this point Josh had put another song on but the crowd had already spotted the very famous rockstar onstage. Uhoh.

I saw Nat's face break out into the most adorable grin I have ever seen and nod frantically while handing her microphone to Ashley and running over to Josh to whisper something in his ear.

I heard Jess calling to me and saw the crowd at the bar. I rushed back to my post feeling Ashley's eyes follow me across the entire club.

As I began to serve the music faded once more and Josh introduced Nat and wait _Ashley_?

I was in shock, serving people on autopilot while I watched Ashley banter with the crowd.

Nat's voice broke me out of my reverie.

"We weren't sure what to sing so we asked a member of the audience and we love what they picked so thank you Matt, ok hit it Josh."

A quiet guitar riff melted into the air of the club and as people recognised the song the buzz in the air grew almost to breaking point.

When Ashley's voice broke through the speakers you could barely hear the line over the roar of the crowd, her concerts must be electric.

_I have climbed highest mountains  
>I have run through the fields<br>Only to be with you  
>Only to be with you<br>I have run  
>I have crawled<br>I have scaled these city walls  
>These city walls<br>Only to be with you_

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for  
>But I still haven't found what I'm looking for<p>

Nat opened her mouth upon Ashley's request to sing the next verse.

I have kissed honey lips  
>Felt the healing in her fingertips<br>It burned like a fire  
>This burning desire<p>

I have spoke with the tongue of angels  
>I have held the hand of a devil<br>It was warm in the night  
>I was cold as a stone<p>

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for  
>But I still haven't found what I'm looking for<p>

Ashley joined in with Nat for the next verse and their voices intertwined perfectly.

I believe in the Kingdom Come  
>Then all the colors will bleed into one<br>Bleed into one  
>But yes I'm still running<p>

You broke the bonds  
>And you loosed the chains<br>Carried the cross  
>Of my shame<br>Oh my shame  
>You know I believe it<p>

Both women had their eyes closed and were facing each other as they belted out the last one liner chorus.

But I still haven't found what I'm looking for  
>But I still haven't found what I'm looking for<br>But I still haven't found what I'm looking for

As the music faded Ashley grabbed Nat's hand and bowed with her to the delight of the crowd.

I turned to see what Jess thought of the impromptu performance and saw tears running down her face.

"Jess what's wrong, they loved it?" I asked.

"N-nothing Spence it's just that song was the first one me and Louise ever danced to." She sniffled a little and I pulled her into my arms.

I stroked her hair as she cried into my shoulder. Jesses fiancé died in a tragic accident shortly before I met her and there are some things that make Jess remember how much she misses her, hopefully she'll always have someone to hold her and maybe someday someone new to love her too.

Jess broke away from me and turned me around by my shoulders. I heard her walk away and the door behind me click shut as I took in the sight before me.

Nat and Ashley were sat at my end of the bar happily chatting away. Nat stopped talking to get congratulated by another friend. As if she felt my eyes on her Ashley turned to meet my gaze.

She didn't have the same hurt look in her eyes this time, it was more tender, vulnerable even and I remembered how much she let her guard down every time she sang to me. I wonder if she's the same now.

Suddenly her eyes were a lot closer and I felt my feet moving of their own accord towards her.

"SPENCE HI." Nat's squeal made me unintentionally break the eye contact I had with Ashley, for the merest second I felt annoyed at my friend, and then I remembered whose eyes I had been staring into.

"Nat hey, that was awesome you and Josh have some serious bedazzle there." I said, my smile almost breaking my face as I remembered the dance I shared with the mystery woman during that song.

"Thanks Spence but I just had one of my dreams come true, you remember, I sang with Miss Davies here. Well, she was kind enough to sing with me." Nat smiled at Ashley who stopped burning the side of my forehead with her eyes long enough to smile at Nat.

"It was my pleasure Natalie; you are one of the best musicians I have heard in a long time." She said.

I could tell she meant every word, not that she would ever lie about music. Well unless it was to tell me I could sing that one time in the car, she actually winced when she said it; at the time I thought it proved how she felt. I'm more of a realist now.

I grabbed two beers from the fridge (import for Ashley and normal for Nat) and handed the two their drinks. I turned to leave but Nat saw and called me back quickly.

"Spence wait, where you goin?" She frowned.

"I have to work sorry Nat." I tried again to leave but her hand stopped me this time.

"Hey, you always talk to me over a beer after every gig, I know you already cleaned the bar, hang on did you get our drinks too?" She said looking confused at the beers sitting on the bar in front of her.

"Yeah Nat but Jess had to go do a stock check real quick so I have to man the bar 'til she gets back, I'll come see you then ok?"

"Ok, but Spence." She was smirking at me now.

"Yes Nat." I really just needed to get away from the brunette next to her now.

"How did you know what Ashley wanted, she never told you?" Oh god she has me. I froze, I could not move a muscle under my friends teasing stare. I caught Ashley's eye and she must've seen the look in mine.

"Yeah I did Natalie, while you were talking to your friend just now." Ashley was so calm right now, and then I saw her run a hand through her hair. Why would she be upset now?

"Ooooooh, so the tension between you guys and the hour long eye fuck is something I should ignore then?" Seriously she looked so smug right now.

"Yup, I'm just star struck Nat." I heard Ashley scoff at that, she knows I don't give a damn who you are or what you do with your life.

Nat laughed though and looked like she believed me, my red face probably helped. Oh god I was blushing must be the hot air in the club. Yeah keep telling yourself that Spence, maybe penguins will fly too.

"Aw Spencer you look a little flushed, everything ok?" I can't believe Ashley just said that, my name I mean. She couldn't say it before at the bar.

I turned my death glare on her, there was no need to mock me in front of my friend she had no right to be all chummy right now, not after the dance floor glare and the mess at the bar.

"Oh right so a girl can't just be hot if she's near you huh rockstar?" Ashley looked surprised at my response but soon collected herself.

"Nope they all want me, I can't help my magnetism, it's natural."

I scoffed at her smirk.

"Hun they just want your money they don't want a person they want a warm body and some Ben Franklins. Oh wait I forgot about the media you have to feed them this bull too don't you?"

Yeash I really didn't want to hold back today but she had no right to act like I want her, because I don't. Cough cough.

"Actually I'm just a great fuck and I don't pay the people I sleep with," she looked uneasy when she said that though, "anyway you're not my really my type."

I heard someone throat clear and we both turned to tell the person to fuck off but we saw Nat looking slightly scared.

I sighed, "Sorry Nat I shouldn't insult your new best bud, enjoy your beer you know it's on the house, as for you," I pointed at Ashley. "I'll add this to your tab because I** can** add up."

I walked away then. I didn't want another argument, it's pointless to try and talk her anyway.

I got back to work and stayed there.

It's nearly 4am now and I don't think my legs are gonna hold me up much longer, my mind and body took a beating tonight but I'm trying to put on a brave face. All I really want to do is go home and cry.

Josh has just raised the lights and cut the music to encourage people to leave voluntarily, there's always the odd drunk that won't quit, gotta love Eddie the bouncer.

I keep on cleaning the tables and I'm just stepping up to the bigger booths opposite the stage and the bar when I heard a shout.

"Oh right so allowing me to put my heart on line for everyone to watch it get sliced again and again is ok?" That sounded a lot like...

"No Ash that's not what we were doing, you and Spencer need to talk you guys just won't admit you want each other, you are both so god damn stubborn, and she was just as much of a wimp as you when I spoke to her." Hey I am so not a wimp, self preservation Kyla.

"Oh you spoke to her, what did she say?" I can't believe she asked that, like she has any right to hear about me."

"Weeeell." I heard Kyla start to tell her, I couldn't have her telling Ashley about the staring and everything so I raced over to them.

"Kyla that conversation was private and between _friends_." I warned.

"Spencer I wasn't going to tell her; chill anyway now that you're both here can we talk?" This is getting ridiculous.

"No Kyla, Ashley doesn't want me she made that perfectly clear tonight with about twenty brunettes; turns out I'm not even her type anyway." I think I sounded more hurt than anything when I said that.

"Hang on, you wouldn't even acknowledge you knew me from jack at the bar so I reacted, the only emotion I could get from you was anger so don't tell Kyla what I want." She was breathing hard by the end of her rant.

"You done Ash...ley" She looked shock that I'd used her nickname and frankly so was I.

"No Spencer, you are so hot and cold, for a few minutes every time our interfering friends have brought us together we just stare at each other, in that moment nothing else matters to me and I hate it when that feeling leaves." She was actually going red now, she'd never looked hotter.

"Ashley." She cut me off.

"No Spence I hate that we can't even talk without hurting each other, you didn't even want Nat to find out we have history and I can tell she's one of your best friends, hell I thought she was your girlfriend."

"Hold up, firstly eeeew, Nat's like my younger sister and second why would you think that?"

"Well the way you look at her you can tell you love her in some way, then she dedicated a song to you, I never do that," Kyla cleared her throat. "Ok that's not entirely true but you wouldn't know about that anyway and you blew her a kiss after her new song, so see it was obvious."

Now I was just confused, was Ashley jealous of Nat?

"Why would it matter if she was my girlfriend any way, and why does dedicating song have to be such a big deal to you people?"

"Which you people are you referring to Spencer?" She looked dangerous now, still hot though.

"Musicians and ex girlfriends who think the world revolves around them and everyone should put their lives on hold to help them with their songs."

"**What the hell does that have to do with dedicating songs?**" She was full on shouting now.

"I helped Nat with her music and that's why she dedicated a song to me but she never asked me to put aside my job, my happiness or my **education** to help her with hers." I was welling up now, god this is embarrassing.

"**Oh I didn't know moving across the country from the person who is in love with you is such a minor issue SPENCER?**" I looked at her and saw tears in her eyes too.

"IT **ISN'T**," I screamed, "**but most people expect the person they're in love with to support them no matter what, but you were too much of a selfish, arrogant bitch to know that.**"

I was full on crying now, tears streaming down my face, Ashley looked about as good as I felt. It wasn't doing us any good to rehash the past so brutally at 3:30am.

"**I was GOING TO but you just up and left without even a goodbye, you apparently hated me, it didn't even matter to you that I told you I still love you.**"

Hold the bus, crazy beautiful rockstar say whaat?

"What?" I choked out.

"What do you mean what, I told you how I felt and you never even bothered to pick up the phone to tell me it was over?" She was nearly hysterical so Kyla jumped up.

"Spencer did you ever listen to the copy of the album Ash sent you or any of the songs on there?" Kyla looked concerned as she held Ashley's hand.

"No I couldn't bear it, I have never listened to her music or watched any interviews." My voice was hoarse from the shouting and exhaustion.

"Spence they tell you how I feel, every emotion everything I have ever felt towards you went into that album the entire thing is dedicated to you, it's on the inside cover of your copy and hidden in everyone else's." Ashley spoke so quietly I barely heard her confession.

"It doesn't matter now, we've both got lives apart from each other and I just don't believe Ashley feels that way anymore, even if she did then." I needed to protect my heart from all this so I just shut down.

"That's not true; I was wrong Spence ok, _wrong_. I can move my life to New York in fact I basically already have," she took a deep breath ready for what she was going to tell me, my breath hitched and my knees went weak when she looked into my eyes. "Spencer I do love you, I always have, and I want you, whether you want me to or not you have to believe that."

I broke eye contact and studied my hands. I knew what I had to do I've been put through too much to just believe her now.

"No Ash, I don't want you to want me, it's been six years with no calls, no messages, no visits, no flowers, no serenading, you never once tried to get me back after you told me I wasn't enough for you. In person Ash, you know I don't care about your celebrity your money or your music I just wanted you and you wouldn't budge on what you wanted for yourself."

I could barely look at her as I spoke but she had to know how much it would've changed things if she'd bothered to seek me out and tell me this years ago.

"Spencer I know you don't want to believe me but I can prove it to you, I can prove we still have what we had before." She looked desperate as she took a step towards me, I automatically stepped backwards.

"Spencer please, you remember our dance don't you." She smiled then a real nose crinkling smile right at me, it took my breath away.

"What we don't have a dance we just dance at clubs to different songs." I said now very confused.

She quirked her eyebrow at me and before I could react she shot forward and grabbed my hand before spinning me around and pulling my hips backwards into hers.

"Seem familiar to you Spencer?" She whispered into the back of my neck, I got goosebumps all over and I prayed she didn't notice.

Oh my god, she just raised my shirt a little and settled her hands right on my hips. I felt a familiar burn seep through my skin from her hands.

"Oh SHIT, it was you." Oh god oh god oh god I should've known no one else could make me feel that way from just touching me.

"Yeah Spence," she whispered, "don't even try to deny how your feeling right now." She pulled me even further into her and put her hands on my stomach again digging her fingers in gently. I bit back a moan, barely.

"Spence I have only ever felt this burn with you and I know you feel it too so please just give the fire a chance to spread, please." Then she scraped her teeth across the shell of my ear and I had to move.

I dived out of her arms frantically and spun to face her.

"Ash all that dance proved is that we're attracted to each other it doesn't mean love or a relationship it means sex, and frankly I don't want that with you either, who knows what you've got?" I was just talking to stop her looking at me now, I was desperate.

"Spence, you're talking out your ass, I know you want me to go away but I won't, I can tell you want me, maybe even love me so I'm not giving up this time I can prove to you that I can be the person I should have been six years ago." She's delusional she sounded like she actually believed what she was saying.

"Fine Ash, but there's nothing you could do that would prove to me that when push came to shove that you wouldn't just try to force me into doing what you want and ignoring my own dreams for you. However, if you find a way you just let. Me. Know." I hissed.

With that said I stormed away, but I didn't miss Kyla's sickening smirk on the way. I almost didn't hear Ashley's next words and I don't think I was supposed to.

"I will Spence, I promise." Ash never made promises; she said she would always break them. I knew she'd have to break this one.

I couldn't help but hope she wouldn't though. Falling for her was so breathtaking the last time around before it got fucked up. I smiled to myself as I went home at last.

**I hope you enjoyed this, I enjoyed writing it. Let me know!**

**Thank you for every review or visit.**

**Chapter 4 will be up on 08/09/2011. Songs were Still haven't found what I'm looking for and Til' the dawn.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**APOV**

Oh my fucking god, my heeeead. This seriously feels like the hulk is using a jackhammer on my eyes. Wait, why am I so comfortable? Why am I not in my bed? And why am I practically **naked**?

My eyes flew open as I felt someone shift beside me I began to panic before I realised I was in my sisters room in the same suite as my own. I sighed with relief and closed my eyes again, burrowing down into the mattress. Last night was a bitch.

I listened to Kyla's steady breathing and I could tell when she began to awaken because her breathing became shallow, I knew if she found me awake I would get a huge 'you deserve to be happy with Spencer' lecture and I really don't need that right now so I kept my breathing steady and my eyes closed.

I heard Kyla move and the sound of her blackberry keys being hammered; damn she was in a hurry to get that message sent. I heard her breathe a sigh after she had sent the message but as soon as her head hit the pillow again her phone began to ring, loudly. I groaned involuntarily but kept my eyes closed.

My sister was never much of a sportsperson but I felt her vault out of bed and heard her sprint across the room to the door. The last thing I heard before the door clicked shut was Kyla whisper screaming, "What the _fuck_ are you doing?" at whoever was on the other end.

Now I was curious, my sister has a heart of gold and I think she proved last night how calm she is under pressure, so I wondered what had made her so pissed? I jumped out of bed and immediately had to clutch the side as my whole body rebelled against the action.

Once the nausea subsided a little I headed over the door to listen in on Kyla's phone call.

As I put my ear to the door I could already hear Ky talking loudly across the room.

"I don't give a damn what you're supposed to be doing, get Glen, Chelsea and Madison and meet me at the rendezvous point, I've booked it already." She went silent obviously listening to his reply.

"Ok that's great remember the password ok we can't have another situation to deal with like last time. Now gogogo!" Jeez when did she become a spy and what were they meeting for? I don't know about any rendezvous, maybe they're planning a surprise party for me or something? Could it possibly have to do with me and a certain blonde I'm in love with?

I was in my head longer than I thought because the next thing I knew Kyla was right outside the door. I ran to the bed and dived headfirst into it and had just got into position as the door opened once more.

Kyla shuffled round quickly putting on clothes before running back out of the room. I had to know what was so urgent that all of my friends had to 'rendezvous' right this second. So I grabbed my clothes and pulled one of Kyla's hoodies over my head then took off after her.

When I reached the lobby I knew I'd lost her, it's bound to be crowded at 9am on a New York Saturday. Oh well desperate times call for desperate measures.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialled my saviour.

_Ring ring._

"_Hey Ash what's shakin'?"_

"Freddy I need your help?" Freddie's my know it all techie genius and my favourite producer.

"_Sure thing what do you need?"_

"I need you to activate Kyla's gps right now and send me the map with the pink dot thingy on like last time?" I said in double time.

"_Ok Ash calm down I'm uploading the map with the 'dot' to your phone now. You stalking her again?"_

"Kinda," my phone bleeped to let me know the map was ready, "anyway I'll tell you about this later I have to run."

I hung up before he could question me some more and checked the map.

Kyla's dot was moving slowly but steadily down the road outside the hotel, she must be in a cab because she had gone nearly two blocks already.

I pegged it out to the front of my hotel, forgetting one small little problem. I'm famous.

Bulbs flashed like crazy in front of me as I tried to push through the crowd to catch a cab.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned round to punch the bastard but smiled when I saw a security guard ready to escort me to a cab. What a relief these hotels have security.

One of the paps had actually hailed me a cab already and was holding the door open for me.

I let him take a picture of me smiling to say thank you, hoping he wouldn't pair it with a lie. That'll get him a pretty big pay day; I hate to be photographed by paps and even some pro photographers so the media would be drooling over a clear shot like that.

Ten minutes later and I had been calling directions out to my cabbie as I saw the dot change direction. I looked up when the dot stopped ahead of us and saw we were passing Grand central station. Why are we on Park Avenue?

"Hey thanks just drop me off here please?"

The cabbie nodded and pulled up to the curb, I chucked him a Ben Franklin and leapt out of the taxi.

I kept my head down to avoid being recognised and walked in the direction the dot was in.

When I was opposite the dot I spun round wondering where Kyla could be before I saw I was outside of the Waldorf Hotel. Hmm flashy much? Hell of a meeting place.

I walked into the foyer and dived behind a sofa as I spotted Kyla right near me leaning toward a receptionist.

The older couple sitting on the sofa looked shocked at my actions but stayed quiet at my request as I crouched at their feet poking only my eyes over to watch Kyla.

"I'm here for the Annual Cheertastic convention planning committee meeting." I heard Kyla say. I crouched back down as she glanced around her.

What on earth is she on about, she hates cheerleaders why would she want to be _tastic_ with them?

"Of course Ms Deevil..." I laughed out loud at that and clapped a hand over my mouth hoping she hadn't heard me (101 Dalmatians is still Kyla's favourite film).

"Thank you, you're in the Alberto Suite today." Oh no, I missed part of the conversation with my giggle fit. Crap.

I poked my head up again and watched as Kyla walked to the lifts and pressed the up button. I stayed perfectly still and watched as she got in then I waited as the numbers climbed higher and higher, thank god she was the only one in there. The numbers stopped at the 8th Floor.

Perfect time for Bond, Ashley Bond to make her cameo appearance. I rolled out from behind the sofa (unnecessary I know but I have to do it all or nothing) and made my way towards the lift Kyla entered.

Once I hit the 8th Floor I crept out of the lift and followed the signs to the Alberto Suite, keeping my knees bent and my gun raised the whole way. Yes I'm sad, but I own it.

I knew I'd found the suite because the door was labelled with big fancy lettering, however it was closed and looked more menacing than I'd expected. I stood there just staring at it until I realised it's pointless to have a staring match with a door, even an evil one.

I shoved my ear against it but it was too thick for me to hear through it. I looked around for what I needed, a stethoscope maybe. Ah ha a trolley with glasses on it, I 'borrowed' a water glass and listened in to the door.

Nothing, there was complete silence, so I reached for the handle. I pressed myself to the wall on the left of the door and opened it quickly. No inquiring voices could be heard so I rounded the frame and entered. A foyer? God this place is like a palace, why does a meeting room need its own foyer?

Opposite me in the fancy red room were two more slightly less menacing doors. I was Alice in wonderland when I pushed the glass against the door on the right. Again nothing, I repeated the process I used with the evil door and saw a bunch of computer equipment.

I was still poking my head inside the freakishly large cupboard when I heard a voice emanating from the room next door.

"_Aiden_, where's Glen? He's supposed to be the closest can you call him please?"

"Sure thing Ky I'll go outside and call him."

Oh god outside was there a balcony in there, wouldn't surprise me. It probably has a hot tub too, yeah Ash _that's_ what they're doing here, hot tubbing.

My thoughts of hot bubbly heaven were interrupting in a major way when the door a metre to my left was flung open. Ashley bond dived fully into the cupboard and closed the door silently behind her. Phew.

My heart was beating like I'd just run 100m against Usain Bolt but I still pressed glass ear to the door breathing heavily, gotta hate adrenaline.

"Glen, hey man, where are you? Kyla's flipping out." I heard Aiden say, obviously on the phone.

I heard the evil door open again.

"I'm right here man chill ya beans." God I hate it when Glen talks like that, he sounds so stupid.

"Thank god, let's just get in there this looks like def con 5 already." Boy speak. Yawn.

I heard them walk into the other room where their voices faded away, that room must be huge.

Once I was out of my cupboard I noticed a sliver of light to my right, the stupid men had left the door wide open well open a little anyway. I inched my way along the wall until I was right next to the door and the aforementioned crack. I could hear voices, loud and clear.

I turned my head and looked through the crack. What I saw made me freeze instantly. Up on a projector screen was the most serene picture of Spencer and me. We were standing on the beach fully clothed with our arms wrapped around each other staring into each other's eyes. She was smiling softly and I was smirking. I wondered how I had managed to lose someone who made me so happy. Oh that's right, I'm angry at myself and scared of rejection (pathetic really).

I noticed Madison stand up and walk to the screen to address the other people in the room.

Me and Madison had remained friends after I got my contract and lost Spencer; Maddy was one of the only people to treat me exactly the same regardless of my fame. She's the person I go to if I need frank advice. I recommend small doses though she can be a bit much at times.

"Ok everyone, I call to order the emergency meeting of the Spashley Support Group. Kyla has something she urgently has to share with the group so Glen, Aiden and Chelsea I give you Kyla." She sounds just like she did when she was bossing people around in high school.

Spashley why does that sound familiar? Hang on, that's what our friends used to call me and Spencer in high school, it's our 'couple name'. Support, why would we need support? I'm so confused. I wait to see what Kyla has to say.

I listen intently as Kyla describes what went down at their little conspiracy last night. I knew Spencer was staring at me from the bar but I didn't know Kyla had taken pictures of us dancing. I have to admit we look hot as they flash across the screen.

There's also one of me with the most horrible expression. Kyla says she took it as Spencer blew Nat a kiss. Ky knew everything down to how many girls I had danced with. I thought she was having a good time. Clearly she's too much of a nerd to enjoy a night out, great now I'm defensive.

The others are as shocked as I am when she's finished. She left a picture of me and Spencer dancing on the screen. I have my face nuzzled into her neck and my arms are wrapped around her. We look like we're in our own world and nothing can affect us.

I remember how scared I got when the song ended so suddenly. I knew Spencer would not have danced with me if she knew so I ran. Before Nat told me she and Spencer are friends I was so jealous thinking Spencer had been using me to make her jealous on the dance floor.

These pictures proved _me_ wrong that's for sure. We're in our own world and loving every second.

"Guy's I know we were considering ending this six year battle but I think we should put in one final attempt. They are closer than they've ever been. Ashley even admitted she still loves Spencer **to** Spencer."

Madison was the first to speak up.

"Kyla I know she's your sister and you don't think she's happy but maybe it's us that have been forcing them on each other when they just don't want it, how would we keep Ash here anyway?" I can tell Madison's genuinely worried.

"Well Ashley still has her concert and I plan to force her to extend her stay, a couple of talk shows want her and this is the end of her tour. I have already looked into her taking some time off, maybe performing in smaller venues while she writes and records her next album. In New York."

Little does Kyla know that I already have all the songs for my next album swimming around my head from last night. I could finish it in a week.

"Ok Kyla but what if Ashley doesn't want to stay here, you can't make her even more unhappy by forcing her, and you might lose her as a sister?" Who knew Madison cared so much.

Kyla let out a huge breath as Aiden joined in the Ashley bashing. I'm so going in there if this continues, I made a promise I intend to keep, and I'm staying in NYC no matter what.

"Madison's right Kyla we could all lose both of them, this is family as well as friends. I think whatever we do next should be our last ditch effort, we have to let them move on sometime."

"Aiden, I know but if neither of them has moved on in _six_ years it must mean they're not over each other." Kyla sounds so stressed out right now her voice shaking with effort.

"Ok Kyla go sit back down I'll take it from here. Let's remind ourselves of how this all started in the first place." Madison says as she picks up the remote and clicks a few buttons; a familiar video clip begins to play.

It was me, drunk, in Melbourne Australia after my first album was proclaimed quadruple platinum. The only person I wanted to share the moment with other than Kyla was halfway across the world and I now knew she'd never heard me pour my heart out onto the silver surface.

I watched myself sob on screen while giving my famous speech.

"I-I know I've lost her now, Ky I, I told her she wasn't _enough_. How could I say something like that? She's the love of my life and it was so easy for her to believe she didn't matter to me anymore. I shouldn't have been so selfish, who cares about a stupid fucking long distance relationship? That's what planes are for. Right, _right._ Ky I need to get her back I can't live without her I can't my heart actually aches and my whole body feels cold without her touching me. Will you help me? Please Ky you have to _help me._ I love her. I love her so much." I'm just passing out on the video and Kyla's stroking my hair telling me of course she'll help and not to worry anymore when the screen goes black.

The next day I couldn't even move I was so hung-over, I remember my speech but I refused to acknowledge this to anyone so Kyla played me the video clip. I shouted at her for half an hour that day and she finally gave up and told me she wouldn't help me if I was about to be run over by a truck.

It took us a while to get back to normal after my bitchy phase but clearly Kyla did not take my words to heart and formed a secret crew to tackle mine and Spencer's 'problem'.

"But Kyla that was five years ago and we've made _no _progress, they're not even friends." Aiden, always the party pooper. I had tears running down my face knowing how little faith he had in mine and Spencer's love for each other.

"So we know Ashley's still in love with Spencer but what about Spencer, from what Kyla said she was pretty cold, she used to not be able to resist Ashley's touch?"

Madison was the voice of reason and to be honest I had noticed the difference in Spencer's reaction to my touch, it was like she was scared of her own reaction to me.

Glen cleared his throat suddenly. The others all turned to him shocked. I hadn't even remembered he was there. I also realised I had been inching forward through the door, thank god they were all too wrapped up in their 'meeting' to notice the door opening wider.

I sat down so if anyone looked at the door they would not see me at first.

"I think it's high time I showed you something I know Spencer would never want anyone to see but I think her happiness depends on you seeing this right now." He walked calmly to the laptop and put a DVD into the slot. He took the remote from Madison and pressed play.

I gasped as Spencer appeared on the screen, crying hysterically clearly pretty wasted. It took me a second to recognise where she was.

She was on the sofa in my Spanish villa. This was only one year ago, Glen had invited Spencer to my villa, (she didn't know it was mine of course, she thought he'd rented it) at the same time Kyla told me I needed to take a break and sent me packing to the same villa. I arrived the day after this according to the time stamp on the video.

I watched as Spencer started to rant.

"Glen why the _fuck_ would she not come after me? I mean, she knows I could never actually hate her, I love her, so much. I can't believe she was so selfish she could've come and seen me at the weekends or even every third week she could've stayed with me. You know I even bought her the first plane ticket so she could visit me straight away. Huge mistake huh? I know my love would've been enough but I j-just cannot understand why she didn't realise it too. She's had five years to make it up to me and she's never even _called_. She's a bitch, a selfish bitch that still holds my heart and it sucks. She has always had a chance and she's never pulled her head far enough out of her ass to even take it. I give up, I just. Give. Up."

Tears are streaming down my face as the love of my life slowly falls asleep on camera. I had discovered Spencer on that same sofa the next day and I never even woke her, I was so tired of missing her I just gave up and caught the first flight out before drinking myself stupid for a week. Looking back I could've changed everything that day. More mistakes to regret, fantastic.

Glen takes the DVD out of the laptop and sighs into the silence as he sits back down without saying a word. I just sniffle, I had a chance I should've know she'd planned for me wanting to visit. I was so selfish back then, things will have to change.

"She saw Ashley on E! A few days' later guys, that's why she left for New York so fast, Ashley told the world she'd never loved her." He sounded angry at me for that.

Oh god I didn't think Spencer even watched the entertainment news. I only told that news reporter I had never been in love to avoid the person I love most taking all the media scrutiny that would come with being my ex girlfriend. Well, at the time I nearly had my shit together enough to go round to her house and beg her to take me back. But alas, I failed again.

I heard Kyla telling Glen this for me. Go sis.

Hearing about Spencer's departure from Paula Carlin (otherwise known as my arch nemesis) was right up there with hearing her say she hated me. Paula actually smirked at me as I cried and ran out of their house, never to return.

"She also became SO angry after that. She wouldn't even talk about Ashley anymore or allow someone to mention her name. She was already avoiding her music but she actually had it banned from Moon to avoid hearing it anymore. She misses her too much to listen." Glen sounds sad for his little sister.

"Glen man, I am totally on board now, they are so clearly in love with each other it's ridiculous they aren't together. They would make each other so happy. I'll keep an eye on Spencer from now on and when you tell me I'll do whatever to get her to be with Ash." Aiden spoke with such maturity. I developed new respect for his adult self.

"So, we know this will be difficult but we should put everything into it, we need to get Ashley to come through on that promise she made to Spencer. She needs to stop being such a damn pussy; she has no rockstar attitude when it comes to love." I grew angry that Madison didn't think I could come through on my own.

Madison clicks a button and the first picture returns to the screen, it stole my breath for the second time.

"This is what we're aiming for folks; we have to shoot for the stars this time because we know they can't take another year of this. Ash needs to make a move." Madison's voice was really getting on my nerves now.

Kyla stood up too.

"Right, everybody brainstorm and we'll meet at the same time next week, if anyone sees Ash making progress help her and make sure she doesn't fuck up if you're with her, we all how unreliable she is with this." Thanks Kyla, for the faith in me.

I was clearly going to have to prove I could keep the promise I'd made to Spencer, because even my sister thinks I'm a fuck up.

They're all standing up as I finally get up the courage to stand up and push the door wide open stepping confidently inside staring in wonder at the picture of Spencer and me. It's amazing up close.

"Oooooh _**mierda**__."_

That's right Maddy; the real Ash is back let's see what I can do when I'm not afraid of what I feel?

**Hope this was ok, I'm moving this story faster now. I have too many ideas to slow down now.**

**Thanks for reading and reviewing, I'm loving writing. Next update will be 10/09/2011.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"Oooooh **_mierda_**_."_

_Meanwhile..._

**SPOV**

"_One day, when I came home, at lunch time. I heard a funny noise. We..."_

I hit the snooze button on my alarm before rolling onto my back and closing my eyes against the sunlight. With memories from last night flitting across my eyelids I felt my lips turn up into a genuine smile.

Whoa, what happened to the cynical Spencer from the bar? I wondered.

I thought back over the 'talk' I had with Ash. I didn't have time to think over her words last night before I passed out.

Ah screw it we all know what I really want to think about, that dance. I had completely forgotten how much Ash can affect me without even trying. A shiver ran down my spine at the thought of the other things she used to do to me, dancing was not her best asset.

"Concentrate." I told myself, I have more to think about than 'dancing' with my ex girlfriend.

I finally dragged myself out of bed, got dressed in an oversized blue shirt and sweats and headed to the kitchen to make myself some breakfast.

I love my apartment; it's not too big and definitely not too small. For my first year at Tisch I lived in the dorms but I didn't really feel like I belonged in amongst my fellow students.

I was still used to being around hundreds of personalities completely different to my own in LA, and I found that having so many similar minded people was a little boring for me.

Once I met Jess (you already know how) and got to know her properly she told me about her plans for a bar/club where musicians could come and play and hopefully be talent spotted.

Jess was so driven at 21 I couldn't resist finding out more about her plans and how she was going to achieve them. I was hooked.

When her inheritance/trust fund came through Jess bought Moon and refurbished the entire place. She had researched running a business and she knew exactly what she wanted.

From start to finish she amazed me, still does if I'm honest.

By the time I finished my first year at Tisch I was working nearly full time at Moon and Jess offered me the rundown apartment upstairs to live. She saw it as another business opportunity and she takes the rent out of my monthly wages. I swear she doesn't charge me enough though. I renovated for the next year until I had totally Spencerfied it.

I have a brand new kitchen which I only had done last year. I thought of my dad when I chose it and it has an incredibly homely feel with its warm wood and light blue walls surrounding the cupboards.

The island in the middle is by far my favourite part though. It's easy to just sit there and think things over. I've come up with many an idea while munching at my island.

DING DONG

Just as I was about to sit down my doorbell pinged, the noise echoing through my empty living room.

My apartment is also fairly open plan with the kitchen and living rooms leading onto each other separated by a partition wall only, but the bedrooms are down separate hallways leading off of the living room and kitchen.

The main bathroom is in between the bedrooms but I have an ensuite in my room. I'm the luckiest student ever.

I hefted myself round the wall and towards the front door. I didn't bother will the peephole and flung the door open.

"Heeeey Spence, can I come in? Ok thanks." Jess barges straight into my apartment and heads for the kitchen.

I shook my head and closed the door marching back to my breakfast.

I rounded the corner to see my best friend sitting at my island, eating **my** shreddies. Typical. Friends never ask but best friends just take.

"Hi Jess, yes thank you I'm fine, how are you? Make yourself at home." I said teasingly.

"Shurur."

"Jess close your mouth that's disgusting." She swallowed my cereal; the bowl was half gone already.

"Sorry Spence I'm starving, well not anymore. I'm good thanks but my best friend is on probation at the moment." She said like she was talking about the weather. My eyebrows shot up.

"What? Why? What'd I do?" I whined.

"Well my _'best friend'_ seems to have failed to tell me about the biggest event in her life since birth, so she's on probation pending further review." Still weather announcing.

"C'mon Jess I don't know what you mean." I lied through my teeth.

"Oh right so you're just gonna stand there and forget to tell me how you used to be in love with Ashley Davies and how she is still madly in love with you and you're the real reason she's never had an actual relationship, riiiiiiiight?" She was sounding annoyed now.

I stayed silent admiring my hands twisting in front of me.

"Spencer you need to tell me about this. I need to listen and you really need to talk it through. I saw the argument Spence, she loves you and her sister says all your friends have been trying to get you guys together since you were 18?" She said kindly.

I opened my mouth but nothing came out. I have no idea how to talk about this.

"Spence, look at me hun," I raised my eyes to hers. "You need to tell me about her, you know I'll understand. Wait a sec. Have you _ever_ talked about it to anyone?"

I shook my head no.

"Oh god, Spencer you nut, you've been bottling this for _six years_, how have you not exploded?" She said mostly to herself.

"Um." Smart Spencer, really witty.

"Spencer, I love you and we will do this now, you've left it far too long already." She got up and walked towards me. I shrunk back slightly.

She wrapped her arm around my hunched shoulders and pulled me towards the couch.

I sank into the soft brown leather and curled up into the arm.

Jess left me there and I stayed silent while she bustled around me, until I what she was collecting.

"Wine Jess, really?"

"We are going to need lubricant for your brain Spence and this is it." She said.

"Its 11:30am Jess."

"Who gives a _shit_ what time it is when my best friend needs to spill her guts?" She's about to get really angry I can tell. Well she's done so much for me the least I can do is open up to her about this seeing as it might be about to blow up anyway.

"Ok, I'll tell you." I said quietly.

"Sorry Spence what's that?" She's teasing me now, I can tell because she's smirking as she hands me the first of many glasses of red wine.

"I'll tell you fool, about everything, don't get comfortable it's a short story." I said while steeling myself for the journey I was about to take, luckily there's no one I'd rather take it with than Jess.

I took a sip of wine and began to talk.

"So it all started my first day at King High in LA..."

_**Flashback**_

_I walked nervously up to the bank of lockers, now where's 189. I was just looking down at the paper with the number on and managed to space out enough to walk right into someone's back knocking them flat on the floor._

_They kept their eyes on their books, picking them up while I just stood there open mouthed. In front of me was the most beautiful girl I had ever seen. I was so busy checking her out I forgot she was speaking for a moment._

"_What the fuck was that for you twat? You know what I don't get care just get..." She trailed off when she finally looked up at me, staring at her._

_I freaked out instantly thinking she would know what I had been staring at and why but she seemed just as frozen as me. I forced myself to speak._

"_I-I'm so sorry I spaced out, I'm new I was looking for my locker. I'm sorry." Smooth I thought, you sound like an idiot._

_The girl just stood up still staring at me, my skin began to burn as she dragged her eyes over my body. I felt totally naked in a really good way. I started to smile until she finally replied._

"_Yeah well don't let it happen again, I don't want to have to beat your ass on your first week." She spat and stormed off._

_I thought I must have imagined her checking me out that is, until the first basketball game of the season._

"_Woooo go Glen!" I was cheering in the stands for my brother when I felt the familiar tingles i had been feeling them all day. I turned around instinctively and found her in the crowd almost immediately. She was standing there; staring right at me, I knew I wasn't imagining the tingles._

_Our gazes were locked for what seemed like hours until the sound of the buzzer broke me from my trance. Disappointed when she looked away I turned back to the game wondering if I had a chance._

_I wasn't entirely out yet but I was on a 'don't ask don't tell' policy at that time. The stare I could feel burning into my back belonged to a girl I really hoped would ask so I could tell._

_And ask she did. I got up just after the third quarter to pee and on my way back found myself being dragged into an empty English room._

_I screamed but my mouth was covered from behind by my 'attacker' before they spun me round and I breathed a sigh of relief._

"_Oh it's you." I said. She just smirked finally let go of my upper arms. They felt cold after that for some reason._

_She started walking towards me and I instinctively backed up at the same time. My back hit the wall after just four steps and I looked at my feet before raising my eyes to meet hers._

_I was immediately lost in them all over again. They were deep brown and completely glazed over with something I couldn't quite make out. She stared just as hard into mine and I felt the hairs on the back of my neck rise._

_I gasped when I felt her hands slip into mine before picking them up. She raised them to either side of my head before threading her fingers through mine and pinning them against the wall._

_I closed my eyes when she stepped closer so our bodies were merely millimetres apart. I could actually feel the heat radiating from her. My heart raced even harder when I opened my eyes to find hers searching my face. My breath hitched when she finally spoke._

"_What's your name?" She said, her voice deep and husky, I forced myself to stay pinned to the wall. All I had to do was arch my back and our whole bodies would come into contact. Lust was clouding my mind now, having her so close was physically killing me._

"_Spencer." I said, surprised when my voice was just as husky as hers._

_Her eyes darkened when she heard me speak. Then she smiled. I went lightheaded as I forgot to breathe once more._

"_Mine's Ashley and I've wanted to do this all day." I looked at her my mid still foggy with lust._

"_What's that?" I asked as I lost the will to stay put._

_She stepped forward at the same time I arched my back into her. I actually heard her breath hitch and saw her eyes roll back as our bodies met at last. Her forehead was now resting on mine. I was only a few centimetres taller than her so it was easy._

"_Spencer I need to know." I barely heard her through the sound of my own heart pounding in my ears. I could feel her breath on my face she was so close._

"_What?" I knew I sounded needy but I couldn't help it as she pressed me into the wall even further._

"_Spencer," She started again. "I need to know..." God this is just painful, I bit back a moan as her lips brushed mine before she spoke against them._

"_Willyougoonadatewithme?"_

_Between her lips brushing mine as she spoke, her body against mine and her words I could barely think coherently. So I did the first thing that came to mind._

_I kissed her._

_**End Flashback**_

"So that's how it started. From that one kiss sprung about twenty thousand others. We never made it back to the basketball game because she took me on our date right then." I finished the story of how Ash and I met eight years ago.

"Wow Spence that's powerful, so what happened after that?" Jess asked. We were already on our second glasses of wine.

"Well, we went out a lot and we never had to hide our relationship except from my mum but my dad helped us do that. We just told her that I had trust issues after a guy tried something a few years before and she left me alone. The day I told her I was gay she flipped out and nearly kicked me out. But you know about that already, it's the other stuff you don't know." I paused to take another sip of wine.

"Ash and I had two great years, we had so much fun and I was so sure she felt as much love for me as I do for her..."

I proceeded to tell Jess everything that had gone down including the argument about our futures and the subsequent attempts by our siblings and friends to push us together again.

Jess just sat there sipping her wine and nodding every now and again. I knew she had opinions but wouldn't voice them until I was ready. When I finally finished talking she just sat there for a little while, the only sound was the music we had put on halfway through my story. I listened to Stephen Christian's soothing voice.

"Spencer." Jess said, breaking me out of my stupor.

"I think you're being stupid." I was shocked when she said that, had she not heard me at all?

"W-What do you mean?" I said incredulously.

"Spencer, you were _eighteen,_ which made you both young and slightly immature, if you were in the same situation now with anyone I'm sure you would handle it differently. Like the adult you are. You should hash it out like adults now that you've had the initial fight which will have taken some of the tension away." She said.

"Jess we're not solving a small issue here, we broke up because she didn't love me enough to let me live my dreams, she actually expected me to drop them for her." I said outraged.

"Actually Spence she actually just wanted you to stay close, and from what you've told me about how close you guys were as a couple it's not surprising she didn't want to lose you to New York."

"She wouldn't have lost me; she should have thought our love was enough to keep us together over any distance." I grumbled.

"Spencer how often did you tell each other I love you?" She asked.

"Every day at least twice a day mostly more to be honest." I said, smiling at the memories.

"Ok but how often did she do things to show you how much she loves you?"

"Um all the time until the last couple of months." I said, not sure where she was going.

"Right, Spence, how often did you do things to show Ashley how much you loved her?"

I held my breath, thinking back.

"Not half as often as she did I guess?" I finally got what Jess was saying. "Oh god she might have thought she loved me more than I love her. Shit!"

"Spence it's not even that, Ashley did a lot of things to prove her love but relationship wise who made most of the decisions?"

"Me, it was Ash's first real relationship." I said, confused once more.

"So Spence when you told Ash to support her did you tell her how to do that?"

"NO, why would I need to?"

"Because you were the one who taught her how to be in a relationship with someone she loves, you taught her what to do when someone's upset and how to talk through most problems and come out stronger. It was only when it came to something neither of you had ever experienced that she didn't have you to help lead her and it took her a while to figure out what you needed. I've listened to her first album Spence and she got it waaay quicker than you got what she needed."

"I don't get it," I sobbed, "what should I have done?"

Jess moved to hug me.

"Spence, all you had to do was wait; you made decisions without each other because you were both scared of what those decisions would change in your relationship. What you should've known is that the love will always be there, you just have to work it into your life."

I stayed quiet taking in what Jess had said. Did I do the wrong thing moving away so quickly and not giving Ash or myself time to adjust to a new lifestyle? I'm pretty sure of the answer to those.

"Jess?" I said softly.

"Yeah Spence?"

"I screwed up."

"I know hun, but you still have a chance. Do you realise that you said love not loved, all the way through?"

I thought about it and realised I had, I grimaced at the pain that word could inflict if it wasn't treated correctly.

"Spence I'm going to ask you something and I want you to think carefully before you answer cuz it's really important?"

I nodded at her, waiting.

"Ok, can you remember, was there any time where Ashley gave up on or put her dreams on hold for you?" She said and I gaped at her. "Just think about it Spence, did she know how to put her dreams aside for you?"

After a long pause I closed my eyes to hide the guilt that suddenly threatened to overwhelm me. Jess nudged me.

"Yes, there was and she did."

"Tell me about it."

"Well, it was right after Christmas Senior year when I slipped down some stairs at school and broke my ankle. I was in so much pain for days and really grumpy but Ashley stayed at my house with me and cared for me through it all. She sang happy songs to me and even used a toothbrush to itch my foot gently."

Jess laughed at that.

"Anyway later that week I answered Ash's phone when I saw it was her sister Kyla calling. Kyla told me that Ash hadn't been answering her calls and that she'd missed her weekly performance at ego. I wondered why it was such a big deal to Kyla until she told me that there'd been scouts from three major record labels there to watch Ash but she'd blown them off. For me." Jess stared at me.

"Wow Spence, the love of your life is an awesome chick."

Jess's words really hit home. Ash had put her dreams on hold simply because I had an itchy leg but I couldn't even move my dreams to a college closer to where she was. Even then I didn't give her time to think how it could all work, hell I didn't give myself time.

I could see how my actions must have looked to Ash like I didn't care enough about her to change the course of my future even an inch when she nearly lost her chance without ever even telling me. I'm the selfish one, who knew?

"Yeah Jess, she is." I agreed before the alcohol took me away from the land of the living.

Glen found us hours later passed out on my sofa, I briefly wondered where he had been before he put me down in my bed and tucked me in, telling me it would all be ok. I faintly heard Jess telling me to get Ashley back or else before I passed out, Ashley's face at the forefront of my mind for the rest of my slumber.

**Thanks for the support .ie. reading or reviewing. This is the groundwork chapter because I need Jess to be involved now.**

**Next update will be on 11/09/2011.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**APOV**

I know this is supposed to be a serious issue but I'm on the floor about to pee myself laughing.

It was their faces, so serious you'd have thought they were planning to take over the world with Brain.

After Maddie swore I thought they'd just chill, instead they all panicked.

Kyla dived for the laptop, Glen snapped the DVD into tiny pieces and Aiden tried to hide the picture of Spencer and I. By standing in front of it, the idiot had our faces projected onto his chest, what a nugget.

Chelsea and I just cracked up at them and I realised that Chels must have known I was there the whole time. I thought she'd been quiet.

I picked myself up off the floor and dragged Chels up too before turning back to the three elephants in the room. Wiping my tears from my eyes I addressed them.

"I want in." I said so determined to get their help properly this time.

There was at least ten seconds of stupid staring before anyone spoke.

"Ash, what were you doing? How much did you hear?" Kyla said suspiciously.

"She's been there the whole time Kyla; we had her at that lovely photograph Mr C took." Chelsea smiled. So Mr C's in on this too, I should've known.

"I want in." I repeated, I hate having to repeat myself but it seemed necessary.

"YES, this is going to be epic Ashley, I'm so glad you finally came to your senses, Spencer is just stubborn." Glen chimed in.

"I know it took me a while but I think Spencer and I both have our issues and if we'd both acted differently we would be a lot happier now. I think it's time a made a real go of getting her back. I never went after her and I regret that but it's time I started being more mature about what I want. Don't you think?" I rambled as I looked round the room, Maddy was smirking, Chels had her eyes closed with a smile on her face, Glen was bouncing around and Kyla and Aiden were, MAKING OUT?

"Whoa hey there lil sis I do not want to witness that." I cringed.

I had an inkling something was going on with them because Kyla had been weirdly MIA in New York until the night at Moon and we've been here for over two weeks already. I'm just glad it's Aiden and not some random freak.

They actually broke apart when Maddy tapped Kyla on the shoulder.

Kyla looked at me slightly sheepish.

"Sorry Ash I was happy I couldn't help myself, anywho, everyone should start planning oh and Ash?"

"Yeah Ky?"

"I'm sorry I know you'll come through on that promise." She said quietly.

I just smiled at her then felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked at Maddy who leant forward to whisper in my ear.

"Thank god you grew some cahonies chica, you scared me for awhile."

I pulled her into a hug, she may be a cheerbitch but she's my friend the cheerbitch.

Maddy handed me over to Chelsea for another hug and Chels whispered more encouragement in my ear.

I always listen to Chelsea, she's so creative and a great business woman to boot. Her work is amazing and popular all over the world because she mixes old styles and modern work. I have a few of her paintings in my own home in LA and my new apartment in New York.

"By the way you are all invited to my new show at the Gallery on Saturday guys." Chelsea said over my shoulder.

Chelsea bought a gallery a few years back and has been showing all kinds of work ever since. I haven't been to any of the shows yet though I might just make it to this one.

"Sorry Chelsea I can't make it, I have to train the new dancers all week, day and night." Madison apologised with a wry smile.

Maddy is an extremely successful choreographer and has recently accepted a teaching position at Juilliard for modern dance. Her summer job however is waaaaay cooler, she's training the tour dancer's for non other than Lady Gaga.

I have never wanted to meet someone so much. Gaga is my idol, she's so free spirited and does whatever she wants without getting into a media struggle. I've never met her because she keeps to herself and has the 'House of Gaga'. A tight circle of friends who tour with her.

"Maaaaddy." I whined fluttering my eyelashes at her.

"NO ash she will not be there and you are not allowed in my vicinity when I am trying to work, not after the Pink fiasco of 2008." She glared at me.

"Maddy that was one time and the ribbon was just going to be souvenir, I didn't know it would be a safety issue to snip one." I was full on pouting now.

She just shot me a glare and walked out, waving goodbye to everyone. Damn next time I'll get to go.

"So Ky if you can separate your face from Aiden's long enough to talk can you tell me what you think I should do next please?" I said.

"Um well, I kinda hoped you would be ok with Spencer coming to your concert on Friday." She looked at her feet while she spoke, knowing how I'd feel about that one.

The concert on Friday isn't just any concert. No one knows but I've never played Madison Square Garden.

This album s the only one I've felt comfortable living that dream with partly because it's New York and partly because after the show I'm taking a break from touring and my own music. Kyla doesn't know about the latter reason though.

I've wanted to start my own record label for years but I've never really had the motivation or any talent I wanted to sign. Nat Freznie might just be the talent I'm looking for but I'll have t work out why she's not accepted any offers yet.

"Um actually I would really love it if she were able to be there, can you make it happen?" I said looking at Glen.

"Yup, no problem Ash." He's changed so much since high school.

"What about Spencer's final project showing next Monday I remember he saying she wanted everyone there, she never named names so Ashley can rock up surely?" Ah Chelsea so lovable and sneaky.

"Brilliant, ooo I'm so glad this is finally coming together, what's happening to Spencer after her she graduates for the second time Glen?" Kyls asked.

"Well she's had loads of offers from production companies to be a director and such but she's not gone for any of them so I really don't know, sorry." Glen looked disappointed that he couldn't help more.

I wonder how I could fit Spencer's dreams around mine, I mean that was my problem to be honest, that and not wanting her to be so far away. After six years I'm pretty much over the whole distance thing but it's working each other into our life that's the difficult part. We have such different aspirations but I'm sure I can find a way for them to mesh.

"Ok guys I'm tired, it's been a long ass morning already and I need a shower so I'm gonna head back to the hotel, but I'll let you know if I plan anything I need your help with."

I walked out to a chorus of goodbyes and numerous hugs.

Shower, shave and get Spencer back was my to do list for the day.

**This is just a short filler chapter before I get on to the heavy stuff.**

**Thanks for all the reviews I love every one of them.**

**TheQueen: **I get what you're saying but it was more about Spencer taking some of the responsibility rather than blaming everything on Ashley. A compromise is reached around chapter 9ish from what I've written so far.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

**APOV**

Ok so originally my plan was to get myself all spruced up then come up with some elaborate and heartfelt way of getting Spencer back into my life. However at this moment in time it's more procrastinating than planning.

I'm just lying here on the sofa in our hotel suite staring up at the swirly white ceiling otherwise known as my thinking spot.

Wherever I go I always demand there me a sofa long enough for me to lie down on and look up. My tour bus has the best squishy black sofa that I named Squidge. I couldn't help myself cuz he swallows you into him.

So my thinking has taken me through all my old tricks, romantic picnic, candlelit dinner, personal concert, flower covered apartment and my personal favourite the sunset walk on the beach.

Problem is, we've done all those things. I need something brand new and sparkly to wow Spencer, but it also has to show her I can support her without questioning our relationship. I know now that people are supposed to be a part of your life, not the whole thing.

I checked my watch and saw that I'd been 'thinking' for three hours and decided to give up.

I hoisted myself off of the substitute sofa, (yup Squidge is the man/sofa for me) and padded to the kitchen in my fluffy socks.

I switched on the TV as a made myself a sandwich and looked up as I heard my name. Typical Kyla always watching E! News. As if anything they say is actually true.

I watched as the news caster waffled on about the end to my tour in Madison Square Garden and I felt the butterflies return as I thought of the venue.

I felt the blood drain from my face as I heard the reporter's next words.

"Rumour has it that the rock princess has never played MSG for personal reasons relating to an old lover who currently resides in our very own NYC, does Ashley Davies have a long lost love? Her publicist has yet to confirm or deny the rumour, more on this as it develops."

Holy crap, I'm dead, all the work I've put in to keep mine and Spencer's relationship out of the media so she wouldn't get hounded has been blown to smithereens. Fabulous.

The only reason I'd ever want my secrets to come out would be if... Hang on?

I dialled Kyla quickly but the evil sibling didn't pick up. I knew she'd started that rumour; it must be her telling me to get my ass in gear and come out about my 'relations'.

I braced myself on the counter in front of me, my sandwich only half buttered it would probably be all warm and gross by now (butter is only nice cold) but I didn't care.

Spencer probably thinks I'm a slut and that's exactly what the world was supposed to think. I had to hide my broken heart for the sake of my sanity and my career.

Critics say my first album shows my softer side and one even commented that it's a window into my soul. He got it spot on; it was supposed to be a window, for a particular person. Shame the rest of the world saw what she didn't.

I need to revert back to the mentality I had when I wrote my first album, I had already written down all the song ideas swimming around my head from last night but none of them fit my new objectives.

Cleaning up my act needs to be the first thing I do. So I text Kyla.

_I think it's time you organised a press conference._

She text back quickly, I knew she ignored my call deliberately.

_When for, you should warn Spencer first, she should know everything before the world does._

My sister the genius everyone.

_Good idea I'll go to her place tonight and try to talk to her._

_Yay, best luck in the world big sis, you'll do great._

I love my sister she's always so supportive of me. Now I just have to plan my outfit for tonight and buy Spencer's favourite flowers Camellia's I think. Fingers crossed for me.

I finished my sandwich in record time before skipping; yes skipping to my room to get ready even though it was only 12pm.

**SPOV**

All day, I've been on edge all damn day. My hangover is not helping things and Jess is still passed out in my guest room. I woke up at around 4pm and thought I smelt something great.

When I reached the kitchen clutching my sore head in my hands I rubbed my eyes, trying to take in the sight before me.

"Hi Spence, how you feelin'?" My big brother grinned at me before flipping the pancake he was cooking. I think a drooled a little.

"Urrr." Was my intelligent reply. Glen just laughed.

"Don't worry just sit down, I have to go to work (Glen is one of the assistant coaches for the Knicks now) but I made you pancakes when I heard you groaning in your room.

So that's how the rest of my day began. I stuffed my pancakes down my throat and cleaned up after Glen left.

Shortly after I'd taken a long overdue shower Jess appeared looking pretty bedraggled mumbling something about evil red poison and home is where the hot water is.

It would've been comical if I hadn't just poured my heart out to her a few hours earlier. She gave me a big hug and left.

That is how I ended up alone in my apartment just chilling in front of the TV.

I channel flicked until I saw a picture of Ashley on stage. I paused wondering if I could watch this without breaking down, now that we'd kind of cleared the air.

"E! News brings you the follow up report on the Ashley Davies mystery. Today rumours began to spread regarding the rock princess's love life, specifically her lack of one. An inside source today revealed that Ashley is only playing Madison Square Garden because someone she loves lives close by." Oh. My. God.

"Her publicist neither confirmed or denied the rumours only announced a press conference for next week, hopefully we will have more for you after that but I know we think there's more to her life before Gold than she's letting on, that's all for now, back to you in the studio."

I just sat there, letting the words wash over me. Kyla didn't deny the rumours were true, is Ash really planning to reveal our relationship to the world. I grew angry, this was definitely something I should be involved in, it should be my choice too.

Maybe I _should_ listen to Gold (that's her first album) it seems to spark a lot of debate. Maybe dismissing it was the wrong thing to do.

Then I backed off, maybe I was over thinking this as per usual, it could just be that Ash didn't know what was happening and someone else started the rumours or a lost love or whatever. I would wait and see or just ring Kyla later.

Sometime later that evening I was throwing together a stirfry, I love them and I always make extra so I can eat it for a week at my own convenience. I'd just finished chopping the veg when my doorbell rang for the first time since hurricane Jess.

I really hope she's not back for more. I thought as I made my way to the door. I checked the peephole this time and instantly freaked out. My heart started pounding in my chest and I started to hyperventilate. I spun round a leant my back against the door realising that only a few inches separated us.

Ashley was here. Who the fuck told her where I live?

I spun back around when she knocked softly, It's as if she knew I was there.

I put my hand on the door handle and pretended to be strong as I pushed down and pulled the door open slowly.

Our eyes locked and I noticed she wore the saddest expression. It soon changed to one of lust as she took in my outfit. I had changed into an oversized shirt and boy shorts after my shower, opting for comfort not cover.

I couldn't help but check her out too, some things never change I guess. I jumped when she spoke to me.

"Hi Spence, can we talk please?"

I didn't bother to reply I just stepped aside, letting her into my apartment and maybe my life.

She smiled wide and skipped in. "This should be interesting." I thought to myself before addressing her cautiously.

"Are you feeling ok?" I asked she just turned to look at me.

"Sure why, do I seem weird?" She looked confused, it was so cute. Whoa careful there Spence she is not cute, not cute. The last time she was cute to you, you ended up in a two year relationship, look how that turned out eh.

"No, you just. Skipped?" I said while closing the door gently.

"Oh uh yeah I do that now." She chuckled uncomfortably so I decided to change the subject.

"I was just making myself some dinner, would you like to eat with me?" I asked, hoping she wouldn't take this the wrong way, I was just being friendly.

She beamed at me. "I would love to." She said looking straight at me.

"Cool but let's not talk until after we eat, stirfry is sacred to me and I don't want to ruin it if this turns sour ok?" I asked, hoping she would understand my need to get used to being around her again before we talked.

She eyed me, obviously trying to read my mind. She sighed deeply before looking around my apartment living room. Lingering for a minute on my brown leather sofa.

"You have a great place here Spence, when do we eat?" She smiled softly at me as she spoke.

I'm gonna take that as a yes.

**Sorry this is so short but I'm updating again later on once I've got the 'talk' all straightened out (pun intended)!**

**I love all the reviews and I like seeing all the different opinions on my characters and how I put them across.**

**I think I need to work on the emotions though. Thanks to everyone who's read and reviewed etc.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**SPOV**

I nodded determinedly and made my way into the kitchen to continue making my stirfry. I had only just put oil in the wok when music began to filter through my house.

I didn't realise Ash liked Saving Jane but I'll file that little titbit away for later.

I heard a stool scrape across my kitchen floor and assumed Ash was now sat at the Island behind me. I knew the moment she started staring at me because my whole body began to burn in an all too familiar way.

I looked over my shoulder and saw the hungry look in Ashley's eyes as she ran her gaze up my legs. Shit I forgot I was only wearing a shirt and underwear. I can't change now or she'll think I'm affected by her. Crap.

I cleared my throat and she noticed me glaring accusingly at her and looked down at the countertop sheepishly. She began examining her palms; she still does that when she's nervous huh?

I turned back around and threw the onions and chicken into the wok relishing the sizzle as they hit the hot surface. I still didn't say anything to her because I was guiltily enjoying the silence between us. It was almost like old times when I would do homework and she would write songs.

We would just sit there for hours in silence just letting the world wash over us as we worked.

I felt my eyes well up as I remembered those precious moments. I put both hands against the counter, the juice from the chicken dripping off of the spoon I was using to stir and let my chin drop to my chest.

I'd forgotten that I'd lost more than just a lover, I'd lost my best friend the person who knew every little quirk of mine and I hers. I felt a tear creep down my cheek.

I felt a gentle hand touch my shoulder and couldn't help the gasp that escaped my lips as a shock ran down my back and arm at her touch.

Before I knew what I was doing I caught her eye with my misty ones and saw my hurt mirrored in the auburn depths. We stayed like that for what seemed like a lifetime, staring into each other's eyes, her hand on my shoulder content to just examine our feelings through the little windows we possessed.

I tore my eyes away and shrugged her hand off when I smelt the onions start to overcook and quickly shoved the rest of the ingredients into the wok and began to stir, frantically trying to save my dinner. Well, our dinner I suppose. I almost smiled at that thought.

**APOV**

She split away so fast I didn't even have a chance to miss the connection we'd just shared until she was beating on those ingredients like they were her worst enemy.

I could never hide from Spencer my true self, good or bad, it always shows through with her and tonight's moment was no exception.

I blushed when she caught me checking her out but noticed how shaken she seemed when she looked down at herself. I never wanted her to be uncomfortable wearing so little in front of me and it still hurt that she was.

I sat there trying to read my future in my palms when I heard Spencer sniff and looked up to see her hanging her head over the hob. She looked so sad I couldn't help myself, I needed to offer her some comfort.

What I intended as a comforting gesture turned into one of our soul searching stares and I don't understand why she broke it, I could actually see her thoughts in her eyes and the pain we had caused each other bouncing around between us at last getting some much need attention.

I fought the urge to sigh and retreated back to my seat at her island.

I watched as she calmed down, the tension almost left her shoulders and the food in the pan got stirred rather than thrown around. After a while Spencer brought some fresh rice out of the microwave. She must have reheated it. Everything smelt sooo good.

I couldn't help but watch her glide around her kitchen, I was transfixed by her skills I never knew she could cook. I grew sad thinking of all the things I won't know about her now. Then determination took over, I needed to fight this time and not let her walk away so easily.

I will get to know her again and all the things she's learnt while we've been apart.

She broke me out of my thoughts when she stretched her arms above her head to stretch her obviously tired muscles. Her shirt rose even higher exposing the lacy black boy shorts she was wearing. I think I actually drooled. Her body was even better now than it was when we were 17.

She put her arms back down picked up two plates and brought them over, placing one in front of me and one opposite me on the other side of the island.

She was too far away in my opinion but I couldn't complain, she might move closer in time hopefully anyway. She handed me a fork and our fingers brushed as I took it sending shockwaves down my arm. She blushed and just picked up her own fork to start eating.

"What no grace?" I said.

I'd meant it as a joke but the expression on her face told me she thought otherwise.

"Not since my mother disowned me no." She said calmly not even looking at me.

"Oh my god I'm so sorry Spence I didn't know, shit!" I mumbled.

She just shrugged so I pushed a little.

"Why would she do something so terrible, Spence?" I asked softly.

She paused for a fraction of a second before answering.

"Well I guess when I continued to be gay after we imploded she saw it as the ultimate betrayal and wrote me out of everything, I was lucky because my dad signed my college fund over to me before she did it so I was able to pay for Tis..." She trailed off at the mention of her dream school; the thing that I let split us up.

Now I'd actually done a little research the week after I didn't chase her and discovered that Tisch really is the best in the entire country and maybe the world for what Spencer wants to do, the schools in LA may be close to Hollywood but they had nothing on Tisch when you look into it and I realised how talented Spence must be to have received a place.

"Spence its ok you can mention it, I'm proud you wouldn't give up your dreams just because I was being a diva." I smiled at her, trying to convey how ok I am about everything.

She smiled back and nodded before we continued to eat in silence. There was no more to be said right now. We just wanted to enjoy being civil for once before we hit the big topics.

**SPOV**

God I can't believe how comfortable I feel right now just eating together. We never really ate in our own in a home in high school. We were always so busy and had so many other people milling around our lives at the time.

I stole glances at her from under my lashes and couldn't help the warmth that spread through me as I recognised the look of contentment on her face.

When she said she was proud of me for following my dreams no matter what I was so stunned I couldn't even manage a reply. I just smiled dumbly as I recovered from my head rush and tried to eat without choking.

After I cleaned our plates away in silence I walked back into the lounge with another bottle of wine and two glasses. I brought my white wine because I didn't think l could handle red right now.

We settled on either end of my four seater and I poured two small glasses of wine. I handed one to Ash making sure our fingers didn't brush this time.

She looked weirdly disappointed and I avoided her gaze, for the time being at least.

We just sat there sipping our wine and stealing glances, letting the soft tension in the atmosphere dissipate a little.

I tried to think of a way to bridge the conversational gap so to speak and came up empty until...

"We should play twenty questions." Where did that spring from?

"Spence, why would you want to play that?" She looked confused now.

I have no idea why I said that I was just feeling awkward but now I think about it this could be useful.

"Well, you could ask me a question and I have to answer honestly and vice versa. They'll be the serious questions that we need answered." I practically whispered the last bit and I noticed Ash looked thoughtful.

"Ok, that's actually not a bad idea it'll be like having a real adult conversation." She's right that's something we've never done.

I nodded. "Good, shall I start?" I asked.

"Is that a question?" She smirked. I shot her a look and she down again, this was no time for our immaturities.

"How many?" She looked shocked at my bluntness.

"What?" She breathed.

"How many since me Ash?"

"Not starting small and insignificant are you Spencer?" She almost looked ashamed, but I knew she was just avoiding the question.

"Answer Ash because I intend to use all twenty of my questions to the max so you may as well just grit your teeth and bear it." I was taking no shit off of her tonight, even if I was a huge part of the reason we had to do this.

"I don't know ten or twelve I think." She said looking into her glass.

My jaw dropped, I couldn't believe that number was so small.

"What about the pictures of you with all those girls?" I asked and she just looked blankly at me.

"It's my turn Spence you know how this works." She said.

I nodded knowing I'd get my chance to ask.

"Ok same question to you Spence, I think I need to know." She looked as if she was bracing herself for a crash. She was literally cringing, her knuckles stark white as she clutched her glass. I almost laughed.

"Um the same as you I guess, maybe a few more I never counted." I could tell she thought it would be worse because she visibly relaxed taking another sip of wine. I could tell she wanted to ask something else but she remained silent waiting for me.

"Why are there so many pictures of you in the media with hundreds of different girls and you've only slept with twelve of them?" She smiled then while I just looked on, waiting for an explanation.

"Actually there's a back story to those pictures. My label wanted me to be in a high profile relationship, as you know, but I just couldn't do it after you and me well, you know." She took a deep breath.

"So they gave me another option, be a typical womanizing rockstar, I thought it would hurt you less if I wasn't in a relationship with anyone but you so I went with the second option."

I thought for a minute but then realised she hadn't actually answered my question.

"That still doesn't explain the pictures Ash and why you aren't an actual slut?" I said.

She shrugged her shoulders.

"It's easy to fool the media I only have to step out of a club with a girl and they assume I'm going to take her home and rock her world. More often than not I just drop them home or at another club, Kyla pays them to keep quiet paperwork is involved too." I gaped at her. All this for one reputation.

"Oh and there's another things, if you look closely you'll see that some of the girls look incredibly similar. That's because they are the same girl in various disguises. She's a paid actor Kyla hires whenever I don't want to have to pick someone up only to drop them straight away."

I'm pretty sure my jaw is about to fall off right now. Ash just chuckles at my expression and looks away again, obviously embarrassed to confess to such a wierd deception.

"Wow that is not what I was expecting Ash." I shook my head trying to clear it.

"I know Spence your expression speaks volumes, my turn anyway." She thought for a little bit.

"Spence, why didn't you give me a heads up on where you wanted to go to college?" She said softly.

I really didn't know how to answer that right away so I took a sip of my wine ignoring her stares as I avoided everything for a minute.

"Um well, I, well you see I was afraid that you wouldn't accept my choices and that you would leave me once you realised I might not be at your beck and call anymore." I said being brutally honest.

She looked to be on the verge of tears when I finally looked at her.

"Well maybe if you'd told me where you were applying and where you wanted to go I would've been able to process you leaving a little better and I know I was demanding those last few months Spencer, Kyla literally had to beat it out of my when we started touring." She said evenly.

"I doubt it Ash, you were pretty hot headed back then, but I was being selfish by not telling you, you told me about the possibility of a recording contract soon." I admitted.

"Yeah maybe you're right I know I could handle something like that now though, I'm different now Spence. It's your turn by the way." I nodded, we needed to move on for now.

I knew what I wanted to ask but I was afraid of the problems we would face if we talked about it too soon.

Ah to hell with problems _six years_ is long enough.

"Ash why didn't you come after me when I walked out, you know I could never hate you so it's not that?" I said tears welling up in my eyes as I remembered walking to my car waiting for her to call my name and make it all ok.

My world came unstuck as I drove home that day.

It took her an age to speak. She kept opening her mouth but saying nothing, at last she downed her wine and shuffled nearer to me on the sofa.

I waited impatiently to hear a long awaited explanation.

"I couldn't bring myself to hurt you anymore than I already had, I regretted my words as soon as I spoke them and I knew I'd done irreparable damage to our relationship Spencer. You were normally the one with the cool head during our fights and I just didn't know how to be rational I couldn't force myself on you anymore. I was clearly making you miserable." She aid dejected.

"Actually Ash I have never felt worse than the week after that fight when you didn't some to see me and then spoke to E!," She opened her mouth to defend herself but I cut her off. "I understand that you were protecting me by lying to the reporter and I respect that and I'm even grateful for it but I was still at home waiting for you to ring my doorbell and tell me to live my dreams with you by my side. That's all I've ever wanted, just you, by my side when I achieve my dreams."

She looked ecstatic when I said that last part, I wondered if she'd had the same aspirations for our relationship as I had.

I felt physically and emotionally drained after our mini speeches. But it was then I noticed that she was inching closer to me on the sofa.

I found myself moving towards her and when she took my hands in hers and interlinked our fingers my heart soared. Twenty questions forgotten for the moment I leant into her a little bit, craving her touch.

"Do you think we can be friends Spence?"

Wait, WHAT?

**Ok so this isn't all of it my any means but I need to work on the dynamic of the next part.**

**I had the last few chapters planned and written before now but I've got upto the point I'd written to so it's just the plan now****.**

**Updates may be every other day but I'll let you know. They can be really long chapters not very often or shorter like this one and more often, let me know if you have an opinion.**

**Thanks for the the reviews, I love reading the debates but it pains me when I know what's going to happen and everyone else has to speculate. I will never try to please everybody but I can tell who is going to like which chapter from now on eek.**

**I just hope I can keep the quality up :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**APOV**

"_Do you think we can be friends Spence?"_

The moment those words left my mouth Spencer froze and dropped my hands. I don't know what I was thinking, I don't want o be friends with Spencer, at least not _just_ friends anyway. Quick Ash fix this.

"I-I mean, we could start back at the beginning and see where it goes?" It came out as a question but Spencer's frown lessened slightly my heart was still in my mouth though.

"Um whose turn is it?" She's chewing a nail, she used to do that when she was happy nervous or about to do something she wasn't sure how I'd react to.

"Yours Spence, but you haven't answered mine yet." I smiled at her, trying to make her more comfortable she was shuffling around now.

"I know but mine's connected and my answer to yours depends on your answer to mine." Seriously she looked like she was about to twitch right off of the sofa. I decided to take pity on her this time.

"Sure Spence, I wanna know what's got you so worked up anyhow." I smirked.

She deliberately caught my eye and searched them, she must've found what she was looking for because she broke away and began to mumble something unintelligible.

"Spence, I can't hear you when you mumble like that." I said.

"I said where do you want _it_ to go?" She was eyeing me carefully now.

My heart skipped a beat as I gave her the truth without hesitation.

"If you have to ask that Spence you didn't listen to me on Friday night." I said with a smile, I knew she wanted to hear me say it again but I wanted her to ask. She still hadn't admitted any actual feelings to me yet.

"Ash come on, just tell me where you want us to go?" She looked desperate now a frown pulling at her mouth again.

"Spencer Carlin, I never want us to stop you know that." I knew it wasn't exactly what she wanted but I needed to hear her admit some things before I poured my heart out all over again.

I looked up at her and saw her frown had disappeared to be replaced with a wry smile.

**SPOV**

I couldn't help the smile that formed on my face as she finished speaking. She always was adorable when she was trying not to pour her heart out.

Ash smiled back warily and I decided to put her out of her obvious misery.

"Ok let's start at the beginning, there's a lot we don't really know about each other now, but first," I couldn't believe what I was about to do.

"Ash, I need to tell you something." I paused as she frowned and nodded probably thinking the worst, the last time I said those words we ended up apart.

"I fucked up, I should've known better than to run away, I knew you didn't know what you were doing, neither of us knew really. I have no more excuses and I want to apologise Ash, for not trusting you with my college choice until the last minute." I said my determination showing through my voice.

I looked at Ash and saw a look of complete shock on her face, eyebrows near her hairline and jaw dropped her face was so hilarious I let a short laugh escape before I covered my mouth quickly.

**APOV**

Her laugh brought me back to earth. She had her hand over her mouth and I saw the laughter in her eyes. Was she joking because if she was it was not funny?

"I am so sorry Ash, your face was just epic." She chuckled.

I smiled in relief, she wasn't joking, she was saying sorry, unbelievable.

"Spence I chased you away and to you it must have looked like I didn't love you." I said and she she shook her head at me.

"No Ash you told me and showed me you loved me all the time, one spur of the moment sentence when you thought you were going to lose me should not have erased a two year relationship. I let that happen, I walked away." She looked so cute all worked up, thinking she has to take all the blame.

"Spence I was too stubborn to put my faith in the strength of our relationship and as result I have lost six years of happiness, don't get me wrong I love my music but my life has been sorely lacking in love. Brunettes just don't cut it." I joked trying to lighten the mood; she still hasn't told me if we can start again.

**SPOV**

I spent a couple of seconds just absorbing her words. They brought so much peace to my heart. We were both finally putting our mistakes out in the open and I was no longer trying to shift the blame.

Ash looked a little tense as she waited for something and I realised that I'd never actually given her an answer about the whole starting again idea.

I jumped up and grabbed Ash's hand and pulled her up. I may have accidently on purpose tugged a _little_ too hard and she stumbled into my body.

I heard her breath hitch and my head swam with joy at her proximity to me.

I smiled to myself and dragged her over to my front door. She walked hesitantly and I had to look over my shoulder and smile to reassure her. She frowned when I opened the door and shoved her out of it.

"Knock." I told her before shutting my door in her face.

I heard her mumbling something about crazy weirdo blondes before she called through the door to me.

"I'll be back in a few minutes ok Spence, then I will knock, don't freak out I'm not running." She shouted.

I stuck my eye to the peephole and watched her smile and shake her head before jogging down the hall away from my door.

Where the hell is she going? I wondered.

I just hoped she'd be back, I made my way back to the sofa and cleared up our wine glasses, we'd barely drank half the bottle.

After my cleaning spree I ran to my room and put on a tank top and some niceish jeans.

Just as I was doing the zipper up I heard a knock on my door. I pegged it through my house nearly faceplanting in the lounge and only catching myself on the door handle.

I pulled down and swung the door open, a huge grin nearly breaking my face as I took in what was on the other side.

**APOV**

I stood there nervous as hell, I think I left my backbone back at the shop along with the confident musician I usually was. Mushy is the only way to describe me at this moment.

It took me a couple of minutes to even lift my numb hand and I didn't feel myself knock.

I heard the sound of running feet and then a loud squeal, knowing Spencer she tripped over, I didn't hear a thud so I assumed she was ok.

The door swung open suddenly and I was left to stare at my beautiful ex with nothing but longing.

There was a huge grin on her face as she took me in.

I took a huge breath in and promptly choked on my own spit.

Spencer grabbed my arm and pulled me into her apartment. My face felt so hot as I coughed my lungs up next to her.

She patted my back as I got my throat under control.

I grimaced as her eyes filled with mirth and I straightened up feeling the need to save the moment.

**SPOV**

Oh god the world is just against Ash at the moment, first I practically kick her out then she comes back looking amazing with a pretty intriguing box and then nearly dies when she tries to speak.

When I opened the door I saw how nervous she looked, then her outfit distracted me completely.

She was wearing one of the hottest dresses I have ever seen. It looked as though it was made for her, dark red in colour it hugged every one of her perfect curves in such a way that I couldn't actually stop staring.

Her coughing may have saved her from being jumped.

Once she stopped choking I reluctantly removed my hand from her back and waited for her to speak.

"Spencer Carlin will you please go on a date with me?" Well she had definitely recovered.

I gaped at her wondering what the hell had brought this on. I had never got to give my answer.

"Bitch you stole my line." I said jokingly before wrapping my arms around her and squeezing her for all I was worth.

It felt so good I didn't even realise I hadn't answer.

I thought I should have some fun with this moment so I loosened my arms slightly and traced my lips lightly from the side of her neck to her ear lobe and back again. I moved achingly slow savouring the fell of her skin against my lips.

On my next pass I moved my lips to the inside of her ear.

As I whispered into her ear my lips brushed the shell and I felt her shiver.

"I would love nothing more than to start again with you so you better take me somewhere nice."

I quickly leant back and pressed a quick kiss to her forehead before releasing her completely, immediately missing her body against mine.

She just stood there for a second before reaching her hand up to her ear and touching it gently, as if she thought it had been a dream. I know I did.

"I won't let you down Spence, can I pick you up and Monday night at 7:30pm?" She asked sounding a little dazed.

I inwardly smiled at her reaction to me.

"Of course Ash, I can't wait." I barely got the words out through my smile.

She walked back out of my front door but not before picking up my hands and giving them a light squeeze. I shivered as her thumbs brushed over my knuckles.

I stood there in shock and she chuckled as she shut my front door from the outside.

I smiled at her as she was hidden by the door.

I wasn't lying; I couldn't wait for our date. I had more questions, screw twenty I have thousands.

Now I have an album to dig out.

**Sorry about how late this update is.**

**I will update again either today or tomorrow for sure possibly twice to make up for the delay.**

**Thanks for all the reviews, I love all the opinions and takes on my work.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

**SPOV**

"Eeeeeeeeeeee"

I squealed like a small child at Christmas for about a minute before I ran out of air and had to sit down.

I sank onto my sofa, my smile widening as I remembered the 'talk' Ash and I had just had.

The relief I felt at having cleared some of our issues was making me feel light as a feather.

I no longer cared about any rumours because me and the woman I love had sorted ourselves out enough to go on a date.

I wiggled my feet in the air in excitement and let my arms fly out around me.

I paused when my hand whacked something off the arm. The rectangular box I'd seen in Ashley's hand earlier hit the floor with a light tap.

After staring for a second I reached out and grabbed it.

I was about to rip the paper when I notices a note written in tiny writing on the side. I recognised Ash's flowing italics and eagerly read it.

_Don't open this until I tell you, it's to do with the date I'm about to ask you on. I really hope you said yes and that I made you smile again. If you said yes I will see you tomorrow at whatever time we agree to, dress smart casual. Xxxxxxxxxxx_

I laughed out loud at her crazy rambling, she did make me smile.

**APOV**

I stumbled along the street outside Moon with the stupidest smile on my face.

Before I knew it I was happily belting out don't stop.

_If you wake up and don't wanna smile, if it takes just a little while._

_Open your eyes look at the day, you'll see things in a different way_

_DON'T STOP, thinking about tomorrow_

_DON'T STOP, it'll soon be here_

_IT'LL BEEEEEEE better than before_

_Yesterday's gone, YESTERdays gone._

I pretended to play through the instrumental section with my piano then spun around on the pavement as I started the next verse.

_Why not think about times to come,  
>And not abooout the things that you've done,<br>If your life was bad to you,  
>Just <em>_**think **__what tomorrow will do._

I flung myself around a couple holding hands and smiling at me as I broke into my best chorus yet.

_Don't stop, thinking about tomorrow,  
>Don't stop, it'll soon be here,<br>It'll be, __**better**__ than before,  
>Yesterday's gone, <em>_**yesterday's**__ gone._

I took my arms back from around their necks and hopped up onto the roof of a taxi, the driver staring at me from his window.

I air guitared my way through the solo in my head making it believable.

I nodded to myself as I hopped off the other side of the taxi into the road. The cars had all stopped but I was having waaaay to much fun to stop now. Traffic be damned.

I span around as I climbed over bonnets singing to the people inside the cars. Thinking of a single blond haired beauty the whole time.

_All I want is to see you smile,  
>If it takes just a little while,<br>I know you don't believe that it's true,  
><em>_**I never meant any harm to you.**_

I put all my power into the next chorus as pointed out at the small crowd from the roof of an explorer. Loads of people sang the next chorus with me, which only made me get more into it.

**DON'T STOP, thinking about tomorrow, **I was conducting now**  
>DON'T STOP, it'll soon be here,<br>It'll be, better than before,  
>Yesterday's gone, <strong>**yesterday's gone****.**

Every single one of the people in the cars and in the crowd on the road joined in for the last few notes. They were surprisingly in tune too.

_Ooooooooooooooooo don't cha look __**back**_

_Ooooooooooooooooo don't cha look __**back**_

I finished big by harmonising with the best crowd ever over the last line then leapt off the side of the roof onto a mini and leant down to the driver's window. The atmosphere was electric and I was sure my face was ridiculously cheesy.

"Hey hun," I said to the startled looking woman inside. "Do you mind if I sign autographs from your roof so I don't get crushed. She looked thoughtful; people were already starting to get closer.

"Um well I don't know what if they scratch it?" She looked slightly scared.

"If that happens I'll fix it or buy you a new one, concert tickets are yours too if you'd like." I smiled.

She just grinned and nodded at me.

I stood up on the roof to address the crowd.

"Hi, I get that this traffic needs to get moving so I will give autographs to these people at the front but that's it sorry folks I have to go soon." I shouted.

I quickly signed things for the first ten or so fans but then slipped Kyla's number to Alison, the mini driver, before walking along the queue of cars roofs and jumping off one I slipped quietly away from the crowd.

This has to have been the best Sunday EVER.

I smiled to myself as I made my way back to my hotel; I needed to talk to Kyla and the SSG about tomorrow night.

**SPOV**

I heard my phone ring as soon as I'd put the box safely away in my bedside table and ran to answer it.

"Heeello." I sang.

"Oh my freaking god Spence get on your damn computer NOW."

I grabbed my laptop and began to log on.

"Hi to you too Jess, what's going on?" I said.

"Just get your ass on your stupid laptop thingy and look up your girl on YouTube."

I typed my password frantically not even questioning who Jess meant when she said 'your girl'.

"Hurry the fuck up Spence." Jess shouted. I pulled my phone away from my ear.

"Ow, what the fuck happened Jess?" I growled, my ear hurt.

"Just type Ashley Davies into the search bar Carlin." She growled back.

I typed her name and immediately got millions of hits.

"Which one do I click on Jess."

"Take a guess Spencer."

I took a proper look at the page in front of me and gasped.

_Rock princess flashmob concert._

Holy crap I clicked on the link and waiting impatiently for the video to load.

"Press play Spence."

"Ok we'll watch it together Jess, that way I know what you're seeing. On my count, one, two, go."

I watched as the video showed the love of my life dancing around the street outside my apartment belting out the lyrics to Fleetwood Mac's biggest hit. This song was mine and hers when we were together, we used to sing it every time one of us got sick.

Ash looked so happy as she sang a verse to a smiling couple.

Whoever was filming this must have already had their camera on because they caught the whole thing.

At first Ash had been meandering down the street with a huge smile on her face, then she had started to hum. Obviously completely unaware of the camera following her.

Ash had then begun to hum quietly to herself before her fingers came out in front of her, playing an imaginary piano in midair.

Then she had air guitared before beginning to sing.

She stared at the sky as she sang.

I laughed loud when she pretended to play the drums and guitar and spun around with her arms out like a little kid as she sand another verse.

The couple she was singing to looked confused but happy and just smiled at her.

I gasped and nearly dropped the laptop when she jumped onto the roof of that taxi.

Her air guitar looked real, like she was genuinely playing the solo in her head.

As she danced over random car bonnets singing her heart out a crowd was starting to grow around her. The road was completely blocked.

The cameraperson had managed to get quite close and was clearly on top of a car opposite Ash as she sung to random people before climbing onto an explorer high above the crowd and belted out the rest of the song.

The crowd was going crazy and her enthusiasm was obviously infectious as the crowd and me and Jess began singing with her belting it out the same at final chorus.

I watched Ash expertly conduct the crowd through the last two lines really getting into the harmony she put around them.

As the video footage ended with Ash laughing to herself on top of the explorer wearing a grin that looked like it could break her cheeks. Her nose was more wrinkled than I'd ever seen it.

"SPENCER."

"Oh my god Jess." I said.

"I know right I've been calling your name for like two minutes now, how cool was that Moon is all over this thing man. What happened?"

"She came round and we talked, I mean really talked she ate some of my stirfry and I agreed to a date tomorrow night."

"Aw you made stirfry, do you have any left?" She whined. Typical best friend.

"That's what you got from that Jess?"

"Yeah Yeah Yeah Spence, you guys are dating again. Whoa all that hoohah was because you agreed to go out with her tomorrow?"

I smiled to myself.

"I hope so." I really did too.

"Wow Spence she must be crazy in love with you to be that free in front of a bunch of people."

"I know and I have some stirfry left I'll box it up for you k?"

"Thanks Spence, I've gotta go I have to check on the bar but I'll see you soon, we need to go shopping for your DATE!" She squealed and hung up, she wasn't big on goodbyes.

I thought about how people would look at Ashley's random behaviour and decided to look at the comments underneath the video which had over 500 000 hits already.

There were some nice ones that said how nice it is to have an artist freely express themselves like that but a few were just bitchy about the traffic jam and how she barely signed any autographs afterwards.

I closed the laptop and decided I should work out a little, gotta be ready for tomorrow night.

**APOV**

"Hey Ash, you are one crazy rockstar but at the same time you are the bestest most geniusest sister ever. What a perfect way to show Spencer how you feel." Kyla said as she squeezed me tightly the moment I walked in the front door of our suite.

"Um Ky as great as that is for me, what the hell are you chatting on?" I asked.

"Your impromptu performance has nearly a million hits Ash and Spencer is definitely gonna see it, it was you guy's song right, I heard you singing it to her a few times?" Kyla smiled at me.

So that's what happened to make her so bubbly. I wonder who filmed it; I was in my own little happy world during that song. I smiled just thinking about the reason for it.

Ky took my hand and led me over the her laptop on the coffee table and we sat down to watch me perform.

After the video finished even I was a little embarrassed at how random I looked but Ky assured me I looked overwhelmingly happy.

"Why were you randomly singing outside of where Spencer's apartment is anyway Ash, did you tell her about the press conference?"

I thought carefully before I answered.

"Ky I only said I would try to talk to her about it, not that I definitely would. Anyway it doesn't matter too much now all the press need to know is that I'm in love and I have been since I was 16 they don't need to know anything else ok?" I knew I wasn't going to get away so easy though.

"Aaaash, you should've discussed what she wants you to say go back there and talk to her better this time." She whined at me.

"Actually Ky we did talk, really really talked and she agreed to go on a date with me, she said we can start back at the beginning and work our way from there." I wiggled around on the sofa in excitement.

"OMG Ashley that's awesome I'm so happy for you guys do you need any help? When's the date?" I smiled at her enthusiasm.

"Actually Ky I have something planned but I'm going to need the SSG's help in pulling it off. Andthedateistomorrow." I said.

"WHAT? Who the hell makes a date they need help with for the next day? You dummy." She had a point there but I really wanted this date to happen I would've taken her out tonight if I could.

"Sorry Ky I couldn't help it, I wanted to see her again." I looked down sheepishly.

"Alrite Ash you're forgiven. Now give me the deets so we can get this show on the road."

Here goes nothing...

**Phew thank god. I've written a few more chapters and there will be updates every day this week.**

**I have been pretty ill unfortunately but I'm waaay better now so I can get on with this story.**

**Thanks for waiting hope it'll be worth it. Let me know.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

**SPOV**

I have never gotten out of bed as quickly as I did this morning regardless of the fact that I stayed up half the night looking at old pictures of Ash and I while watching the YouTube video of her singing our song on repeat.

After a quick shower I threw on some jeans and a Nickleback shirt and went to eat some breakfast.

While I was sitting at my island I couldn't help but reminisce over all of my past dates with Ashley and with other people.

Ash and I never really had a romantic first date because of the amount of lust we felt for each other. Neither of us really realised we were in love until about a month into our relationship.

We damn near said it at the same time too but she chickened out. I used to lord that one over her but now I know she was just scared that it would push me away. I smiled at the thought of how close we were back then.

I'm so glad we were able to talk through everything and I understand how she was feeling a little bit more now. All the bullshit that I needed to sort through was shifted and I felt lighter than I had in years.

I shook my head to empty it a little, one thing I didn't want to do was over think everything, that was severely detrimental last time and I won't be making the same mistake twice.

I put my bowl in the sink and walked into my lounge to call Jess. She picked up after only two rings.

"Hey Spence" She sounded happier than usual I'll have to figure that one out later.

"Hey Jessie, how'd you know it was me?" I asked flopping onto my sofa.

"Oh you know, intuition, so are you ready to go shopping? We have to get you something special for _toniiiight_." She sang, oh how I love my bestie.

"Yeah Jess I'm all set when do you want to go?" I laughed turning on my TV and muting it.

"Now, let's go right now hun we'll get you some new shoes too." I heard her scurrying around probably putting her shoes on.

"Ok I'll let you get your shoes on_, _I'll flag a taxi and come to yours now." I didn't wait for her answer and hung up; we'd done the same thing hundreds of times now.

I put a call in to Nat on my way out to grab a taxi but she didn't pick up. I figured she would call me back later.

As the taxi pulled up to Jesses apartment building about five minutes later I couldn't help but wiggle in excitement at why we we're going shopping today. Grinning to myself I saw Jess running towards the cab.

"Smart casual." I said as Jess hopped in with her mouth already open.

"Girl, you read my mind, now let's head to Madison Avenue." Jess told the taxi driver while my eyes bugged out at her.

"Madison Av, but Jess I cannot afford that kind of dress or whatever." I said sadly.

"Yes but I own a club Spence, I'm paying for this one, consider it you early Christmas present." She smiled.

"Jess its February." I said darkly.

"Fine, late Christmas present then, whatever I'm still buying, you got me those tickets to Pink last year." She said impatiently.

I just rolled my eyes and sat back, I loved to shop so I wasn't gonna complain about really nice clothes when they were going to land on my person.

"Wow, those ones Spence!" Jess gasped as I stepped out of the changing rooms at Macy's.

"You think?" I said unsure of her choice, the jeans were practically painted onto my body and seriously low on my hips.

"Totally Spence, your rock star's gonna flip when she see's you in those." Jess looked a little stunned at how I looked in these things; well I should look good for $500. I'm so paying Jess back for this.

We checked them out then moved on to find me a top. I couldn't help but wonder what Ash had planned for our date tonight.

**APOV**

"Oh my god oh my god oh my god!" I screamed slamming my head repeatedly against the countertop.

Kyla rubbed my back soothingly.

"How the hell are we going to pull this off without the press getting wind of where I am and who I'm with, I need to talk to Spence about the press before they notice us. Oh CRAP!" I tried to slam my head onto the counter again but I was met with a softer material.

"Ouch, Jesus Ash you were gonna knock yourself out with that one." Kyla said rubbing her left hand which had been squished by my stupid head.

"Sorry Ky that's what I was going for." Then again, I thought. It wouldn't be a good idea for me to have a massive bruise on the noggin for my date later.

Oh god my date, with Spencer, the woman I've been in love with for eight years.

Our second first date was in only five hours and I was officially flipping out.

Everything was organised thanks to Kyla, Aiden, Glen and Chelsea (Madison was swamped with work) but I couldn't have been more remiss in forgetting about the stalkers who documented my every move.

"I've got it!" Kyla screamed.

"Pray tell genius publicist." I said sarcastically, so far Kyla had only suggested stupid things like parachuting to our destination to avoid being spotted or shooting all the paps where they stood. She remembered her career would be pointless if we went through with the latter one though.

"Ok well what if we spread rumours that you're going somewhere specific tonight then hire Emma and she can be a decoy on the other side of town while you enjoy your date with Spencer?" She said thoughtfully. I just smiled and pulled her into a hug.

"You're a genius sis that might actually work!" I said squeezing her hard.

"Can't...breathe...Ash...Ley"

"Sorry Ky, can you go start that rumour now?"

"Yeah of course I'll tell them you're going to that new club opening in the Bronx later, that'll keep em well away." She said as she walked out holding her phone to her ear already putting her plan in motion.

I let out a huge breath and finally felt as if I could pull this off without freaking out again. I had Kyla choose my outfit so I can't change my mind over and over.

It's not my usual style, just my sexiest jeans and a nice dark red top that sets off the streak in my hair nicely. It's more conservative but hugs me nicely and there's less chance of me being spotted this way.

I would be wearing a baseball cap for some of it but I already had that where it needed to be. I couldn't wait for tonight but I have nothing to do until then. I decided to go downstairs and sign some autographs for the fans outside.

I'd been in New York for nearly five days and still hadn't signed anything for the fans out front, they deserved something so I got my act together and headed down taking my guitar with me, might as well give another impromptu performance while I'm there I feel like singing about how happy I am.

Me thinks there's a new song to sing today.

**SPOV**

Just as Jess and I were stepping out of our last shop (we already had everything I needed but we love to shop so we window shopped quickly) I saw a large crowd forming around a window ledge of the Omni Hotel.

"Jess look." I pointed to the crowd.

"Let's go check it out Spence." She agreed.

As we got closer we heard the distinct sound of an acoustic guitar being played expertly. We stepped up onto some crates so we could see, I stared at my feet so I wouldn't fall off.

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

I looked up at the ledge in surprise when I recognised the voice. Ashley.

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

I saw her smile as she began to sing a song I'd never heard.

Early in the morning  
>My friends already calling<br>Ready for a party  
>They're just getting started<br>Wouldn't miss it for a moment  
>My heart's already stolen<br>Heard she's gonna be there  
>To miss it wouldn't be fair<br>No, no, no, no, no, no

When a rockstar wants her girl  
>She'll catch her any way she can<br>I'm telling you I got a masterplan  
>I'm gonna get you yeah<br>Make you my girl

Dodo dododo do do de

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

Driving down the highway  
>Roberta, Donnie Hathaway, yeah yeah<br>Playing on the airwaves  
>As we're making our way<br>We pull up to a red light  
>Check the mirror for the last time (for the last time)<br>I know I'm looking just fine and I feel all right  
>'Cos I know I'm gonna party tonight, yeah, baby<p>

When a rockstar wants her girl  
>She'll catch her any way she can<br>I'm telling you I got a masterplan  
>I'm gonna get you yeah<br>Make you my girl

"Is this one of her songs?" I asked Jess tapping my foot instinctively.

Dodo dododo do do de

"No and I've never heard it before so it must be new, she looks so happy Spence, just like you." Jess smiled. I just looked back to Ashley and enjoyed the song.

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

_Dodo dododo do do de_

Walking through the party  
>With everyone behind me, yeah, yeah<br>Suddenly I saw her  
>My heart it started jumping (and jumping and jumping and jumping)<br>Then she led me to the dancefloor  
>Then she held me closely (so closely, baby)<br>Then she whispered softly (ooh)  
>Will you be my one and only<br>My only girl

When a rockstar wants her girl  
>She'll catch her any way she can<br>I'm telling you I got a masterplan  
>I'm gonna get you yeah<br>Make you my girl

When a rockstar wants her girl  
>She'll catch her any way she can<br>I'm telling you I got a masterplan  
>I'm gonna get you yeah<br>Make you my girl

Jess grabbed my arm and spun me round underneath in a little dance, Ashley really is talented. Everyone was dancing around now with Ash smiling to herself singing with her eyes closed.

_Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, de  
>When a woman<br>Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, de  
>When a woman<br>Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, de  
>When a woman wants her girl<br>Do do, dododo, do, do, de  
>When a woman<br>Dodo, dododo, do, do, de  
>When a woman<br>Dodo, dododo, do, do, de  
>She'll catch her any way she can,<br>yeah, yeah, yeah  
>Dodo, dododo, do, do, de<em>

I was transfixed by Ash as she finished out her song with a smile.

**APOV**

When the buzz from singing didn't wear off straight away I realised I felt a very familiar tingling sensation. It couldn't be.

I opened my eyes to find the girl of my dreams and the inspiration for my new 'made up on the spot' song looking right at me a smile on her face.

I couldn't help but smile back, I wanted her to know how much she means to me and I'm glad she saw me singing.

A bodyguard was keeping the crowd back but I knew my hotel wanted their entrance back so I quickly locked my eyes on Spencer's again and mouthed.

"I'll see you tonight."

She smiled and nodded before turning to get in the cab waiting for her and her friend, Jess was it?

I hopped down and made my way up to my room, high as a kite after my little performance and found Kyla already uploading a good quality video onto YouTube.

Apparently my fans absolutely love my new random performances I just hope Spence did too.

Now I'm ready for tonight.

**SPOV**

"Wowee Spencer, I knew your girl was talented but damn she looked so comfortable up there, her concerts must be off the charts." Jess rambled on while I was deep in my own thoughts.

I saw how at ease Ash was just playing her guitar and singing, almost to herself. That song was awesome too she looked like she was just making it up as she went I made a mental note to ask her about it.

Suddenly an idea popped into my head. If all goes well tonight I think it could be the perfect present for Ash if I can pull it off. I chuckled to myself knowing Ash would flip of she could hear my idea right now.

I was so ready for our date tonight.

**Hopefully this extra chapter makes up for the lack of updates over the weekend.**

**I have work tomorrow but I will try to prefect the date before then but I'm still not happy with it yet.**

**Cheers for the reviews I'm overwhelmed with the response!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

**SPOV**

"Ok let's see, hair."

"Check."

"Make up."

"Check."

"Alien invasion."

"Check."

"Spencer."

"Check."

"SPENCER!"

"Check...oh sorry Jess I'm just..."

"Nervous Spence, I could have been murdered right here in front of you and you would've just sat there with that little smile on your face thinking about _Ashley_." She teased.

I was in my own little world the entire time Jess was helping me get ready. I felt kinda bad but I knew I'd make it up to her, I've been meaning to set her and Nat up they've been dancing around each other for ages now.

"Sorry Jess I'll make it up to you, it's seven now so you can go downstairs if you want I can keep myself occupied for a little bit." I said, Moon would be pretty busy soon and they would need Jess to run things without me there either.

"Nah Spence you will freak out if I leave you alone, come down to the bar for a minute?" She held out her hand for me.

"Ok," I said taking her hand and letting her lead me through my apartment." "Just let me turn the TV off etc."

I reached for the remote but froze when I saw the image on the screen.

"_Rockstar Ashley Davies has just arrived the grand opening of new club Echo. We'll watch out for her next move stay with us tonight gossip royalty."_

What the hell? I mean, how she could stand me up so publicly. She wouldn't, oh I'm confused.

I turned off the TV and left my apartment with Jess in tow. Might as well put in some hours I still owe Jess for the clothes I'm wearing right now. I'll puzzle over this one at work.

**JPOV**

Oh god ever since Spencer saw Ashley at that club opening she's been working with this stony look on her face.

I understand that Ashley is a celebrity so maybe she's just working before she picks Spencer up. Yeah that'll be it. I saw how much she loves my friend and how much she loves her back.

Its seven thirty and I can see that Spencer's nearly breaking from trying not to cry. I have to do something.

I look over to Nat at the other end of the bar and pretend not to notice how hot she looks in her short shorts and vest tonight and instead call her over.

"Hey Jess what's up?" She said her voice definitely _not _sending shivers down my spine.

"I er I," smooth Jess." I need you." Seriously get it together.

"Hmmm what do you need me for?" Is she flirting with me? Oh god her smile. I cleared my throat in an attempt to exorcise the dork from my soul.

"I need you, to take Spencer up to her apartment and calm her down maybe give her a beer or something." I said frantically my nerves around this woman are just insane.

"Sure I'll take her now."

She seemed to notice how on edge I was because she just smiled sadly and went to go grab Spencer.

I watched her walk away, I don't know why I just cannot help but stare at her when she's around. I hadn't felt that way in a long time but she's still my employee so nothing can happen.

Shame but I've held it in this long I can keep it to myself until she gets signed and leaves. I hated the pang I felt in my chest when I thought of not seeing her every day.

I realised I had been standing there staring for a while and Spencer was giving me a suspicious look over Nat's shoulder as she walked backwards to the door.

**SPOV**

I knew I wasn't imagining Jess and Nat's connection but Jess is a damn good actress when she wants to be so it's highly possible that Nat has no clue how Jess feels.

I will have to do something about all the UST between those two. Maybe it will distract me from my absentee ex girlfriend/no show date.

I looked up to find myself outside of my front door but I was even more surprised to see who else was there.

"Glen what the hell are you doing here?" I asked surprised.

"I'm here to escort you to you date for the evening."

I was so confused now but I wanted to hear what she had to say about not picking me up herself.

We walked silently out to a silver 2010 Ford Falcon, the most popular car and colour in the USA.

Glen opened the passenger door for me and I slid in but nearly jumped right back out in shock when I saw someone smiling at me from the driver's seat.

My hand grabbed the door after Glen had closed it and gripped hard.

"What the hell Ash?" I asked quietly.

"Spencer what's wrong?" She looked confused at my anger.

"I saw your little club appearance tonight; I thought you had stood me up." I said a little embarrassed at my obvious overreaction.

"Oh god sorry Spence I should've warned you. I have a decoy out tonight so we can have our date press free." She looked frantic.

Oh my god that's so sweet of her, it was then I noticed the cap on her head, how does someone make a baseball cap look hot. I looked her up and down before even registering what I was doing.

She looks amazing I think I might be drooling.

"So _hot_." I thought to myself.

"Thanks Spence that's nice of you to say, you look pretty good yourself." She giggled when I blushed realising I'd said that out loud and in a very husky voice too.

"The decoy is a brilliant idea, but we need to talk about the press eventually Ash." I brushed off the last few seconds.

"Yeah I know how about we talk about it on the way." She said.

"Ok, where are we going?" I asked.

"Yeah Spence like I'm going to give that information over that easily." She smiled.

"I still have some questions left Ash I think I should use one." I teased.

"_Speeencerr,_ that's so not fair it's a good surprise I promise." She reached for my hand as she pulled out onto the road at last.

I tried not to be distracted by her thumb brushing over my knuckles as she drove.

"Fine, I'll let you have this one Ash but only because I owe you for doubting you earlier." I should never have thought she would stand me up, I know she wouldn't do that to me.

"Spencer its fine I should've warned you but while we're on the subject Kyla is arranging a press conference for Saturday." She told me.

"That's in five days."

"Yeah but it gives us time to sort ourselves out a bit and Kyla needs to make plans for after my last concert."

I cringed knowing that Ash would be leaving New York to record in LA. She must've noticed how uncomfortable I was because she squeezed my hand to get my attention. She looked a little sad too.

"Spence nothing is set in stone yet, in fact I have a plan but I need a few more days before I tell anybody. No, that doesn't include you I will tell you the moment it's sorted." She smiled when she noticed my happy grin at her words.

I reached out and flicked the radio on. When Ash's voice flooded through the car I remembered the album lying on my bed still in its wrapping. I still couldn't bring myself to listen yet but tonight I would. I need to hear how badly my judgement hurt us.

Ash turned the station over and chuckled when we heard her name again.

"_Ashley Davies once again spontaneously entertained her fans today outside her hotel. She sang a brand new song which has now become the highest requested song on our station so Davies, if you're listening can you grab a recording studio real quick and get us a copy we actually need it. We are all waiting to hear what has our favourite rock princess so darn happy right now too. We'll keep you updated as we hear."_

I flicked the station again and Motown flowed through the speakers.

I squeezed her hand tightly as I leant back with my eyes on her, trying to memorise her beautiful face.

She smiled at the road ahead and I knew she felt my eyes on her. I sighed happily and just waited patiently (or not) to see where we were going to end up this time.

I can't wait.

* * *

><p><strong>Just the start of the date, I had to post this because it's taking me ages to get the date sorted.<strong>

**Too many extra ideas hehe.**

**Hope you like this so far, the date should be up tomorrow, monday at the latest! Lovin' all the reviews they are awesome I'm so grateful to you all for supporting me and the others on here. xxx**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

**APOV**

The closer we get to our destination the more homicidal the butterflies in my stomach get. My breathing is starting to become erratic and I think I'm about to break Spencer's fingers.

Oops I bet she's noticed because she's stroking my arm with her other hand. I turned my head and forced a smile trying to reassure her.

The first part of our date is pretty tame it's the last part that I'm tense about. Relying on Chelsea to come through with something for me was easy but actually going through with my plan is going to be the hard part.

"Ash?" I faintly heard Spencer through my own heartbeat.

"Yeah Spence?" I said tightly.

"What's wrong you seem completely on edge, did you want to do this another time?" Aw she is so sweet.

"Spence I'm fine this is all just slightly overwhelming but I'd rather be overwhelmed than anywhere without you." I attempted to reassure her, I could tell she wasn't buying my act but she dropped it anyway letting out a sigh as she relaxed back into her seat.

I realised that we were near enough to our destination for me to inform Spencer where we're going.

"Hey you." I said gently, she looked spaced.

"Huh." I knew it.

"We're nearly there."

"Where?" I chuckled at her.

"I thought we'd start off gently so I brought you here." She hadn't even noticed where we were yet. You'd have thought she'd have figured it out when we went over the bridge.

"Oh my god. Why am I dressed casually?" She stared at me in shock.

"Because." Not my smoothest answer but it'd have to do, I needed to get her inside before I told her why we're not dresses to the nines.

I jumped out of my generic car and jogged around to her side to let her our.

She allowed me to take her hand as she was getting out but she moved away subtly when I tried to put my hand on her lower back. I tried not to let the hurt show on my face, knowing she must be feeling very nervous.

I'd brought her to her favourite restaurant (even though she hasn't ever been her to my knowledge) so we could have a romantic meal just the two of us.

As we walked into the restaurant Spencer gasped and actually walked straight into me not watching what was in front of her as she ogled the view of Manhattan.

"Welcome to The River Cafe may I show you to your table?"

Spencer just turned to me, eyes wide and misty, mouth open completely unable to speak it seemed.

I stepped back under the irrational impression that I had upset her somehow but she just stepped closer before wrapping me up in her arms for the first time in what seemed like forever.

I felt my neck get wet and I realised she was crying and nuzzling into me. I could barely breath she was holding me so hard.

I signalled to Aiden to give us a few minutes and he nodded and smiled when I gave him the thumbs in regards to Spencer.

Once he had retreated into the Kitchen I stopped rubbing Spencer's back and pulled back slightly, keeping hold of her shoulders as I did so.

She had her eyes closed and I let go of her shoulder so I could wipe the tears from her cheeks.

I smiled at her when she tried to lean into both of my hands at the same time. She hummed when I gently rested my forehead against hers.

"Open your eyes beautiful." I whispered to her.

My breath hitched when she opened her eyes and her azure orbs met mine filled with. Happiness?

I sighed in relief when she smiled at me.

"You booked out my favourite restaurant?"

"I. I. Maybe?" I questioned, not sure if she'd mind me spending so much money on her.

"I love it Ash." She chuckled when my shoulders visibly lightened.

"Phew shall we admire this amazing view from our table?" I asked smiling as she grabbed my hand and stepped away. I immediately missed her forehead against mine.

I looked around the restaurant as Spencer followed me towards the table next to the windows in the centre of the view. Hundreds of candles lit up the main restaurant but the light from the Manhattan skyline created an ethereal glow over the room rendering the candles almost redundant.

Aiden reappeared just as I got Spencer and myself seated. I could feel her eyes on me the entire time I was sitting down and fiddled with my napkin as Aiden handed us our menus with a smile.

"What can I get you ladies to drink this evening?" He asked sweetly.

I looked at Spencer but she nodded at me to take the lead. I grinned cheekily at her before ordering.

"We'll have vodka cranberry and a dry vodka martini please Aid." I saw Spencer's face light up out of the corner of my eye as she realised I did indeed remember her favourite drink.

"No problem I'll be right back with those."

I opened my menu and snuck a glance at Spencer through my lashes.

She looked unbelievably relaxed her hands soft on the menu as she read over her options, though we both knew what she'd pick.

I jumped when Aiden placed our drinks down. The wrong way round I might add.

He raised his eyebrows as I reached over and swapped the martini he'd given me for my real drink. I grinned up at Aiden as he realised that my girl has a few sides to her.

Spencer didn't seem to have noticed Aiden's stare as she picked up her martini and swirled it before sipping it gently.

I cleared my throat to get her attention and she looked up at me smiling as soon as she met my eyes.

"You ready to order Spence?" I asked. She nodded at me and I turned to Aiden.

"We would like... ahhh," I cringed as a realised my error. "Sorry Spence, may I order for us?"

She just grinned at me and winked, I took that as a yes.

"_We_ would like Oysters and Rainbow Trout for Starters and one Sirloin and one Lobster Special for our mains please." I asked smiling at Spencer who was practically glowing at me now.

"Certainly, I will inform Mr Steelman of your choices." He took our menus and sent us a grin before heading to the Kitchen.

She was staring at me again even more intensely than before. I gazed out of the huge bay windows admiring the skyline once more.

I didn't realise I had let my eyes drift shut when I felt a hand slip into mine they flew open in surprise, I saw Spencer kneeling in front of me trying to catch my eyes.

She stood up once she had my gaze and turned around surprising me again by settling herself on my lap and wrapping my hands in hers effectively trapping herself in my arms.

I sat up straighter and couldn't help but kiss the side of her neck before settling my head on her shoulder.

She leant into me the only sound in the room was the soft piano music pouring out of the hidden speakers around us.

"Ashley Davies." Spencer said my name quietly.

"That's my name Spencer Carlin." I said barely able to move my jaw because I didn't want to move from her shoulder and neck.

"I wonder if your fans know how soft you really are rockstar." She said slowly.

"Unlikely Spence, they haven't had a chance to see their idol in love yet." I said honestly.

She chuckled.

"Are you saying they will?"

"Is this one of your questions?"

"Answer it."

"I hope my fans will be able to see how happy you make me." I whispered turning my head to speak against her neck.

I felt her heart rate speed up under my lips and I smirked against her, its nice knowing I'm not the only one with no control over my reaction when she touches my skin in any way.

"You make me happy too. Even in two short days I'm happier than I have been in years, in this aspect of my life anyway." She whispered.

"I'm glad we have each other and our careers now Spence, we've definitely grown up in our time apart." I said squeezing her closer to me.

She turned her head and caught my eyes again and I became lightheaded as I took her loving stare in, gradually returning it with equal intensity.

She leant towards me slowly and I could feel her breath on my lips.

I jumped when a throat cleared behind us, narrowly avoiding head butting Spencer I craned my neck to glare at the intruder.

Aiden grinning sheepishly at me, holding our starters.

I held Spencer tighter to me when she tried to get up, I didn't want our moment to end just yet.

I pouted at her when she turned and kissed me gently on both cheeks before unwrapping herself and squeezing my hands and returning to her seat.

"I'm not going to make the same mistake with the starters as I did with the drinks so, Rainbow Trout?" I pointed to Spencer who blushed at the name of the starter and licked my lips at my Oysters.

"Thanks Aiden." Spencer said smiling at my enthusiasm.

"No problem I'll see you in a bit." He smiled.

Spencer and I ate in silence only occasionally catching each other's eye throughout the starter.

I couldn't help but moan when I tasted the last Oyster and I caught Spencer's blush when I opened my eyes. I giggled at her reaction and she just blushed harder.

Soon enough we were both in fits, it was nice to relieve some of the tension of whatever kind in the room.

Aiden returned just as the last burst of laughter faded leaving us smiling stupidly at each other.

He silently collected our plates and walked away obviously not wanting to disturb our moment again.

**SPOV**

Every little thing Ash has done tonight has been completely for me. She remembered my favourite restaurant, drink and meal. Every time she made small gesture of love towards me my heart swelled up to a ridiculous size.

When she ordered my main course without even hesitating I had to do something.

I knew I had freaked her out with my intense stare so I move around to her seat and settled myself on her lap.

Feeling her against me was heaven and I never wanted to move. When I knew I was going to kiss her I had never felt more love and I nearly punched Aiden when he ruined it for us.

I put a lot of stock in our new first kiss because I know how good it's going to be. Six years is a long time to wait for the love of your life's lips to meet yours once more.

We chatted comfortably through our main course and I can honestly say that I've never felt more comfortable around Ash. It turns out neither of us has changed in any major ways only matured slightly and learnt a lot more about how to be diplomatic.

When Aiden asked us about desert he flinched at the look Ash shot him and I just felt confused at her actions.

She looked guilty when I asked if everything was ok and told me that this was actually not the end of the date and she had a little more planned for us tonight.

My spirits lifted to new heights when she told me that, I was glad we wouldn't have to part just yet.

I reached out over the table and gestured for her to give me her hand. She did so willingly and I ran my thumb over her knuckles gently. I saw goosebumps on her arm and smiled at my effect on her.

**APOV**

When she smiled I knew she knew what she was doing to me. Electric shocks were rendering me speechless as they travelled up my arm.

Aiden had gone to get ready to drive us to the next part of our date and my butterflies returned full force.

When Aiden returned dressed in jeans and a shirt I stood up jerkily.

I walked around the table to get Spencer and she surprised me for the millionth time tonight when she grabbed hold of my hips and pulled me close searching my face for something.

"Ashley Davies, stop freaking out on me I'm sure I'll love whatever you have planned for us. You don't need to be scared baby." She said gently looking into my eyes the entire time.

Her eyes and the feel of her thumbs rubbing my hip bones sent me reeling. Then she called me baby and I melted into a pile of mush in front of her.

She placed a tender kiss on my forehead and took my hand to lead me out of the restaurant only pausing to stare at the view one more time.

I blindly followed her still feeling the heat radiating from the two spots she had been rubbing slowly.

When we reached the car Spencer pulled me into the backseat with her as Aiden hopped into the driver's seat as planned. I was relieved to see there were no paps around. My decoy must be working.

We pulled away from the curb and my nerves started to return once more. As if she sensed my tension again Spencer tugged me closer to her and eventually just dragged me across the backseat and wrapped me in her arms.

I'm pretty sure the position we're in is illegal but I don't care because she feels so damn good. She has her legs both sides of me, her arms are wrapped around my middle and she is stroking the inside of my right wrist softly sending even more shocks up my arm.

I closed my eyes and relaxed into her embrace and I heard her giggle in my ear. I peered up at her questioningly.

"You're purring Ash." She said through her laughter.

She stroked the inside of my wrist more deliberately and I felt a distinct vibration run through my chest and immediately blushed at my obvious pleasure.

"It's ok baby, I'm the same when you touch me too." She hugged me closer and I enjoy having her body pressed up against my back. Hmmm maybe I could take advantage.

I untangled one of my arms from over hers and moved my hand the rest on top of her thigh. I applied some pressure to my thumb on the inside of her thigh and drew odd sized circles. Her breath hitched behind me and I smiled to myself at my affect on her.

Slowly I trailed my hand up my thigh my thumb still massaging inside until my hand was almost behind me.

A slapping sound echoed around the car as Spencer's hand landed on top of mine, preventing me from torturing her anymore.

I kept making the small circles with my thumb even with my hand stuck and I felt Spencer wiggle uncomfortably behind me.

I felt her breath on my ear as she scraped her teeth over the shell making me shiver and my thumb press down hard into her.

"Alright, break it up you two, we're here."

I froze, with all of my teasing I hadn't had time to prepare myself in the event that this fails miserably.

Spencer whispered in my ear.

"Ash your frozen sweetie why are you so scared I love our date?" She sounded concerned that I was reacting so badly to my own plan so I tried my best to pull it together.

I shuffled ungracefully to my side and exited the car looking up at the small but intimidating building we were opposite.

I breathed out a huge sigh before blinking hard mentally preparing myself for this.

When turned around I was back to being the confident Ashley Spencer knew I would usually be. 'I can totally pull this off.' I thought to myself as I smiled confidently at Spence.

She smiled back, instantly recognising the change in my demeanour.

I took a breath ready to get the show on the road.

"Do you have the box Spence?" I asked.

"Oh SHIT ON A STICK." She shouted.

"I'll take that as a no then hmm that'll make this..." I was interrupted my Aiden.

"Actually Ash Jess and Glen realised Spencer didn't have it in all the confusion over the decoy so Jess retrieved it and Glen drove it up to Brooklyn." Aiden said obviously proud of their little team.

"Well, where is it?" I asked Aiden's smiling face.

"Um oh yeah iiiiit's right. Here!" He said as he got it out of the glove box.

He handed it to Spencer and she looked at me questioningly.

"Aiden thank you we'll see you soon yeah?" I said.

"Yeah no problem Ash," He walked over and gave Spencer and hug and then me, when he hugged me he whispered in my ear. "Everything's all set Ash, Chelsea's waiting. Good luck my friend."

I smiled and waved along with Spencer as he jumped into the Falcon and drove away.

"Well then Spence," I said excitedly. "Let's get you inside it's cold out."

I took a set of keys out of my bag and unlocked the dark red door, the building we were outside was non descript so I knew SPecner hasd no idea what was instore.

I opened the door wide and watched her walk through.

The dim automatic lights slowly illuminated the large foyer we had entered as I locked the door behind us.

"Is this where you kill me?" Spencer asked.

"Yup, I have chainsaws or a machete, you pick." I said jokingly.

"Haha, hilarious Ash, where are we?" She asked looking around at the empty space.

"Well, this place used to be a theatre way back when but it's been abandoned for a few years after the company running it went bust." I said, Spencer just stared waiting for me to continue.

"So I rented it tonight to make use of the big screen and such." I told her.

"Why would we need a big screen Ash?" She asked eyebrows going up.

"Open the box Spence, that'll help." I said nervously.

She slowly opened the box and paused before taking out the contents, holding it up to the light to confirm its identity.

"This is..."

**SPOV**

I'm in shock, my mouth is dry and my heart is beating out of my chest.

"This is..." I started but couldn't continue.

"Yeah it is." Ashley's voice trailed off towards the end.

"How?" Was all I could get out.

"Um well um remember after you left I put that box of stuff on your porch." She said.

"Yeah my dad told me about it but I only ever need a couple of things from it. I'm pretty sure my mother threw it out when she dismantled my room." I said sadly.

I looked down but Ash stepped closer and lifted my chin with her hand.

"I kept everything worth keeping that you left at mine Spence," she told me lovingly. "Your favourite hoodies, your pjs, your diary, your, well everything I needed in case you came back and we made up like I thought we would."

I couldn't believe she'd had enough faith in our relationship to keep everything. If only I had had a chance to look in that box instead of just hearing about it I would have discovered her intentions immediately.

"Ash that is so sweet but it doesn't explain what I'm holding, this is extremely personal and you know that." I scolded her.

In my hand I'm currently holding a memory stick. However it's not just any old drive. This is the place where I stored all of my footage. Every last little bit of footage from my entire senior year of high school and the summer beyond should be on this little drive.

Ashley knew that and had still never returned it, I assumed I'd lost it in the move to New York.

My final project for senior year was maybe only 2% of the footage I had garnered; I have to admit most of the filming was of Ashley and me so only for my eyes (no one else was allowed to see my girl in a bikini or otherwise, cough cough).

"I'm sorry Spence, I found it right after you left, it was plugged into my computer. I thought if I gave it back to you it would look like I wanted to return the time we spent together and I didn't want that at all. Soooo I kept it and only just used it." She said the last part in no more than a whisper.

"Used it?" I narrowed my eyes at her.

"I I know it's not proper of me at all but could you give me a chance with this. Please Spence?" She was actually begging, it was obvious she hadn't ever watched it until recently but I wanted to know what she meant by used.

"Ok." I replied.

She looked so relieved I thought she might cry but she held it together. I took her trembling hand in mine.

"Ash its ok I don't blame you for keeping it and I believe you didn't invade my privacy until now so show me what you have for me." I was eager to see it now.

She brightened up at my words and led me through a couple more doors before we emerged into a dark theatre.

"Wow." I said as I took in the glamorous decor and plushy seats.

"I know, it's amazing isn't it." Ash said.

I saw someone come up behind Ash and tap her on the shoulder.

I laughed when Ash jumped a foot in the air and clutched her chest in shock.

"Jesus Chels you damn near killed me." She breathed.

"My bad Ashley but I'm ready when you are, your popcorn and sweets are on your table at the back along with the sofa you requested." Chelsea smiled at me when she mentioned the sofa.

Ashley smiled at her gratefully.

"Thanks Chels, I owe you one, how do I start this thing?" She asked.

"Here's the remote Ash just point it at the top right of the screen and it should work fine. I'm off now but call me if something goes wrong. I love you both."

She handed Ash the remote then waved at us as she went out the way we came in.

**APOV**

Once we were settled on either end of the sofa at the back of the theatre with the popcorn I started to introduce what I had done.

"Spence, I just want to say that this is by far the most terrifying thing I have ever done. Chelsea did all the editing with me once she knew what I wanted and there's a video of me in there that you won't have seen before." I was shaking with nerves but I tried not to show them.

Spencer eyed me before nodding and motioning with her hand for me to press play.

I closed my eyes as I pointed the remote and clenched my jaw when I finally pressed play.

Soft music flowed around the theatre.

_My girl, my girl..._

I heard Spencer gasp as the picture of us from the SSG meeting appeared on the screen.

I turned to watch her face as various still of us morphed into one another in front of her eyes.

Already my eyes were starting to tear up seeing how she reacted to that first picture, that alone made my year.

Soon enough the music faded out to be replaced with scenes filmed by Spencer.

"_Hi, my name is Spencer Carlin and the girl I'm about to sneak up on is my girlfriend Ashley Davies."_

_As Spencer walks silently through the halls of King High during what is obviously a lesson she hums to herself._

_As she rounds a corner she slows down and then duck under the window of a rehearsal room door._

"_Now," she whispers. "My girl is in their playing the piano and singing and I have yet to catch her doing either with my trusty little camera. Today I plan to change this."_

_She slowly pulls the handle on the door and opens it just enough to slip the camera through._

_The picture wobbles as the camera is placed down and the door clicks as Spencer shuts it._

_Once the film clears Ashley can clearly be seen sitting at the piano completely oblivious to her surroundings._

_She starts to play a haunting melody but then shakes her head and begins to play a much brighter tune. When Ashley starts to sing the camera picks every note up perfectly as she runs through a brilliant version of Ain't No Mountain High Enough._

I watched my 17 year old self singing about Spencer in the cheesiest way possible. I shook my head in disbelief; I would never be caught dead signing this normally. Chelsea is evil. Hell so is Spencer.

The next scene was a simple one of Spencer and me at the bowling alley but my vocals continued in the background providing the soundtrack to our celebration when I finally got a strike. Spencer was seen lifting me into the air and spinning me round wildly before plonking me down on the floor and kissing the life outta me.

I saw her smile at that one.

Smiley Faces began to play in the background and my foot began to tap to the infectious beat as multiple scenes played of Spencer and me in various places.

The mall, the beach, her house, my mansion, the pool, my bedroom, my closet (weird) then finally a really funny one of us brushing our teeth in sync when we didn't know the camera was filming from its place behind us. We got more foam on the mirror than in our mouths.

Spencer laughed out loud at that one especially. I personally enjoyed the one of me throwing her in the pool repeatedly, every time she tried to get out in fact.

As the song trailed off the clip I had been dreading cued up.

White writing trailed across the screen.

_This video was taken by Kyla Woods five years ago approximately ten minutes after Gold was proclaimed quadruple platinum. She is in Melbourne Australia and clearly a little drunk._

I closed my eyes as I heard my drunken ramblings that were so raw and true even if I was drunk.

I heard a sniffle next to me as Spencer listened to me profess my undying love for her only minutes after my success reached ridiculous heights.

As the clip ended it folded into Spencer's scene in Spain. I got angry because I specifically asked for this one to be left out.

When it was finally over more pictures flitted over the screen, most of them of us and some with the group. I breathed a sigh of relief, she didn't leave.

The screen went black leaving me speechless and exhausted. We could have been so happy for all this time had we just grown up a little sooner and realised what we were missing, we wasted so much time.

I hung my head and let the tears fall into my lap, turning my palms up so I could feel them.

I flinched when I felt Spencer draw closer to me form her end of the sofa.

When she put her arm around my shoulders and pulled me into her I began to sob in earnest.

The sobs wracked my body and I clung to Spencer as I plastered my face into the space between her neck and shoulder.

She put her other arm round me and kissed the top of my head as I cried into her, soaking her neck and shoulder with my tears.

**SPOV**

It felt good to know that Ashley was finally letting her emotions out, she probably hasn't cried in a very long time now so I know she needs this.

I already knew about the clip from Spain but Ash had looked very angry that Chelsea had put that in there so I didn't say anything.

When Ashley's sobs seemed to calm down a little I kissed her on the forehead leaving my lips inplace as I spoke to her calmly.

"You feel better now Ash?" I asked gently.

I felt her nod into my neck and I just lay against the back of the sofa and held her as her tears continued to flow silently.

I hadn't even registered I was falling asleep until I jolted awake sometime later that night.

When I tried to move my arm to see my watch I realised our position and smiled, this takes me back.

Sometime in the last few hours I assumed, I had lain down on the sofa and Ash had draped herself over the top of me her head resting comfortably in the crook of my neck still.

My neck felt dry so I assumed it's been awhile since Ash stopped crying.

I shuffled carefully and freed my left hand from under Ash and glanced at my watch. It read 2am.

I raised my right hand and tangled it in Ashley's hair absentmindedly running my fingers through her messy curls thinking over our night.

The restaurant was amazing and I have never felt more love than I did in that room but this video and the effort it must have taken to finish the planning just makes it seem so much more intimate.

I loved that she feels able to show me that video from Australia and I'm glad that I have conformation that she felt the exact same way as me.

I waited patiently for her to wake up rubbing her scalp at odd intervals and enjoying her warmth radiating through me.

**APOV**

I inhaled deeply as I woke up from the best sleep I've had in years. I soon realised what had brought that on.

Gradually my position on top of Spencer became too tempting for me and I nuzzled further into her neck trying to tangle myself in her completely.

I froze when I heard a slight chuckle above me and looked up guiltily.

"Comfortable Ash?" She teased.

"Maybe," I grinned. "What time is it?" I yawned.

"It's nearly 2:30am sleepyhead." She replied.

"How long have you been awake?" I yawned yet again.

"Not long Ash, I didn't want to move this sofa is so comfy ya know." She said.

"So it had nothing to do with the person on it with you." I chuckled, knowing the power my squidge could have over a person.

"Nah, she's just a bonus." She said plainly.

I decided to get her back for that little comment. I began to place butterfly kisses from her collarbone to her ear lobe while dragging my free hand over her rib cage, she shivered underneath me and I held back a moan when her nails scraped over my scalp lightly.

"Ash?"

"Yeeas."

"We should move." She said sadly.

"But Speeence." I whined.

"Nope Ash that is so not gonna work on me I'm older and wiser." She smirked.

"Oh yeah, how bout this then?" I rolled on top of her effectively straddling her.

"You moved." She said smugly.

Damn it, I don't have a comeback for that one.

"I kinda like where I am now thanks Spence." I said while leaning further forward getting ever closer to her lips.

I saw her eyes darken and widen slightly but was taken off guard when she threw herself forward, propelling me backwards and straddling me easily. She had my hands pinned either side of my head before I could even think.

She was breathing heavily and I couldn't focus on anything but what was down her shirt, her leaning over was giving me the perfect view.

With a peck on my forehead she jumped off of me and motioned for me to follow her out of the theatre.

I had to give myself a moment to calm down, dominate Spencer always got to me in ways you can't even imagine.

I apologised to squidge for messing around on him then followed her out of the doors smiling to myself as I went.

I drive her home in the rental car I had left in the nearby car park earlier and walked her to her door, getting increasingly more nervous the closer we got.

When we reached her door she turned to me and smiled warmly.

"Thanks for the date Ash, it was definitely the best I've ever had."

My heart got bigger at that comment.

"Thanks Spence. I tried." I murmured shyly, all my game had left for Alaska it seemed.

She took my clammy hands in hers and stepped closer to me. I unconsciously held my breath as she leant closer to my face and glanced down at her lips.

"Can I have a goodnight kiss Ash?" She whispered looking between my eyes and my lips.

I nodded dumbly completely awestruck by the woman in front of me.

She leant in further and waited for me to get my act together. I knew how amazing this would be so I smiled before leaning in and had barely touched her lips with mine before...

"Fucking finally," Jess shouted flinging Spencer's door open. "Where have you two been I've been worried sick... ooooh shit Spence, don't look at me like that I didn't know I was going to interrupt, gah I'm so so so sorry Ashley and Spencer, I'm so..."

"Jessica Bailey shut the hell up and get back inside my apartment NOW!" Angry Spencer equals hot Spencer. Jess retreated leaving us to our awkward silence.

"Sooo I should go, I'll call you tomorrow Spence." I said, disappointed that I Jess had ruined our moment.

She looked just like I felt.

"Yeah, I'll talk to you tomorrow, so today really." She chuckled lightly.

"Yeah." I smiled at her and kissed her gently on her forehead then both her cheeks before squeezing her hands and leaving.

When I reached my car I hesitantly opened the door and climbed in. I turned to put my seatbelt on and was shocked to see Spencer sprinting around the back of the rental.

I sat their staring blankly as she wrenched my door open. My heart suddenly began to race when I saw the look in her eyes. A cross between lust, love and pure determination.

She grabbed my hand and yanked me out of the car then quickly pulled me against her. I vaguely heard my car door shut in the background before I was pushed up against my car and her lips melted onto mine.

I moaned at the sensation as I kissed her back almost instantly. Her hands found their way into my hair and mine worked their way from her back to grip her waist tightly.

It was the most intense kiss I have ever experienced and my head swam with the feeling of her body pressed against mine.

When I tried to deepen the kiss more she pulled away. I groaned involuntarily at the loss of contact before taking in oxygen frantically to appease my burning lungs.

I saw the uncontrollable grin on Spencer's face and found that it mirrored the one on mine.

Eyes shining she pecked my lips one more time and I could feel her breasts rising and falling as she panted.

My grip tightened on her waist when she spoke, her voice low and gravelly.

"I had to do that, call me today baby. Goodnight, sweet dreams."

My body felt cold when she broke my grip and ran back the way she had come leaving me light headed and needy against my car.

I shakily opened my door and fell into the driver's seat. I felt something in my pocket and pulled it out to find it was a piece of card with a number written on it.

I grinned wider when I realised that she had given me her new number. I would be calling that in a few hours but first.

I pulled out my phone and fired off a quick text, first thanking everyone for their help and telling them it went well and second asking them if they were free on Friday for a concert and a party.

I thought for a second before typing one more message and sending it quickly. It simply read.

_Sweet dreams Spence. Love Ash xxx_

Time to crash me thinks. I sang to myself all the way to my hotel.

* * *

><p><strong>Ok, this is the chapter I have been stressing over the entire time I've been writing this story.<strong>

**Let me know your thoughts, good or bad. Thank you so much for reading this.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

**SPOV**

I ran back up to apartment not even thinking about where I was going my mind was on the kiss. I inwardly squealed at the mere thought.

I happy danced my way back into my apartment completely forgetting about the irritating bestie on the other.

_Spin spin spin, wiggle hips, hands up, fists, drag down front, spin again, wiggle hips, woo._

My happy dance was rudely interrupted by a throat clearing and I paused mid wiggle glaring at Jess's smug grin.

"Nice Spence, very nice." She smirked, the cheeky devil.

"You idiot Jess, you _ruined_ my perfect moment with your ramble back there."

"Exactly Spence, _back there_, waaaay in the past now, tell me about the real kiss you're so worked up about right now." Jess waved her hands around trying to avoid the point.

"I think you owe me one Jessie." I smiled.

"Huh, no way Spence last time I owed you something I ended up covered in milk and eggs it was gross I stank of sulphur for days Nat wouldn't come near me." I grinned at her slip up.

"Why would it bother you if Nat wasn't near you Jess?" I said nonchalantly, pretending to be puzzled.

Jess had the best reaction, she went white, then red before coughing slightly and stuttering an excuse.

"I er I well we um, I don't know?" She said it like a question, door is open.

"It's ok Jess I know how you feel about each other." I put it out there, she went even redder if possible.

"That's well... That's ridiculous we're friends, good friends. I mean yeh she's hot I mean not hot but, you know, gorgeous. Oh god I'm shutting up now." I had to hold back my laughter at this point; my friend would not appreciate being even more embarrassed right now.

"Jess," I caught her by her arm as she tried to get out of my apartment. "It's ok that you like her." She looked like she was going to cry, maybe I pushed it too hard, but I barely pushed it at all.

"No Spence, I don't, I mean, I can't, I..."I cut her off, we were getting nowhere.

"She likes you too you know Jessie." I used her nickname to help keep her calm.

"What, no, no she can't I'm her boss." She said the red going down slightly.

"Why does that mean she can't like who you are and admit it you're hot Jessie!" I said trying to keep this show on the highway.

She stayed silent for an age; I could practically see the cogs whirring away in her brain. I can see why my friends were so frustrated with me and Ash, this is pure torture.

"Jessie." I spoke softly. She seemed to break out of her own world slightly.

"Huh Spence?"

"You ok hun?" I asked gently.

She looked at her feet then pulled her arm out of my hand and smiled at me. I breathed a sigh of relief at the confident look on her face.

"She likes me?" She asked hopefully.

"Yep." I said smiling.

"How do you know that?" She looked a bit put out, probably because she's _blind _I tell you.

"Well, she smiles the moment you walk into the same room as her, she leans into you waaay too much when you guys hug, her eyes follow you around the club as if she can't tear them away and half the originals she's written mention someone special who looks mysteriously like you, she..." I paused for breath, and noticed Jess looked slightly overwhelmed but I carried on anyway.

"She checks you out constantly when you walk away from her and you remember angels and devils night?" Jess nodded at me dumbly. "Nat could not stop drooling at your devil costume slash mini dress I had to elbow her more than once to get her to wipe her mouth. How have you not seen this? Wait, don't answer that, you're exactly the same with **her**." I finally finished.

"Uh wow, how long?" Jess croaked.

"Um her or you or both?" I asked, already knowing the answer to all three.

"Both wait, yeah both." She nodded and shrugged, weird combo I tell ya.

"I knew there was something there from the moment I first saw the two of you together Jess, you guys found any excuse to touch each other." She looked disbelieving so I expanded.

"At first I assumed it was just lust but pretty soon I could sense the connection between you guys and I knew it was so much more than I simple crush." I smiled at my friends gaping mouth.

"Why didn't she do anything then?" She looked like she thought she had me.

"Why didn't you?" Ooh snap she looked taken aback by my question.

"Cuz."

"Jessie, that's not an answer. It's too real, for both of you to put it out there without some sort of guarantee right?" I knew what I was talking about now.

"How, but, _how?"_

"I know these things Jess, and I also know that there will never be a guarantee you have to take a chance on this one hun." I smiled gently and moved to hug her.

"Thanks Spence." Jess said into my ear as she hugged me back tightly.

"No problem, but you guys are _blind_ as bats." I chuckled.

"Sure, says the girl who took six years to kiss the woman she loves more than anything in this world!" She said smugly.

I had no come back for that one, it's so true.

"True, but are you going to ask Nat out?" I asked hopefully.

"I don't know, I am her boss." Jess sounded unsure now.

"Do it Jess, she's going to accept a contract soon anyway."

"Why hasn't she Spence?"

"I have no idea."

Jess sounded as worried as me about Nat's future and we both broke apart to think about it. I finally broke the silence.

"Well, I need to sleep on this one it's practically 4am."

"Yeah you dirty stop out." Jess snapped obviously she really had been freaking.

"I'm back before 6am therefore I did not stay out but thanks for worrying I love you for that." I said through my yawn.

"No problem Spence, I came round when you didn't pick up either of your phones." She replied catching my yawn easily.

"I'll fill you in on what happened when I've slept yeah?" I said my grin practically snapping my face in half as I thought about my date and _the kiss_ again.

"Oh hell no I see that smile Carlin, I need to hear about his right now."

"But."

"No way, get your pj's on Carlin I have mine with me and we'll talk in your room then I'll stay over."

I repeated my happy dance multiple times that with Jess laughing as I relived the best date ever.

**JPOV**

"So wait," I said, "She remembered everything, as in _everything_?" I could not get past Ashley's amazing powers of recollection.

"_Yes_," I was annoying the hell out of Spencer with my mini obsession. "She remembered my drink, food, restaurant, editing style. Every. Little. Thing!"

She started to wiggle obviously about to do another happy dance while I was still puzzling over the memory thing.

"Ok, you always drink VM's so that's easy, you love Rainbow Trout and Lobster so that's pretty simple but you only ever mentioned the restaurant once in your entire time together and not directly to her and you thought she wasn't watching whenever you were at your computer editing stuff. How did she do it?" This is confusing.

"Love Jess, I could tell you similar random things about Ash." She said confidently.

"Let's test that shall we Spence, see if love is that powerful." I said smiling, this would be fun.

"Let's do it." Spence smiled back easily.

"Ok, her favourite... Food?" I decided to start easy.

"Steak." Hmm no hesitation.

"Drink."

"VC, but she mixes it weirdly if she's making it."

"Interesting let's step it up... Place?"

"Wherever I am." She put her hand to her mouth when she realised what she'd said, she never even paused to think so I knew it must be something Ashley has said. I just smirked at her.

"Really, thing to do in bed. And it can't be sex unless you're gonna be specific." She wouldn't get away with that.

"Fine," She sighed. "But you can't tell anyone." She shot me a stern look. I nodded at her drawing a cross over my heart that made her smile.

"Well it might have changed but I doubt it very much, she liked, well she..." Specner was going red now, this must be good, I grinned at her.

"C'mon Spence." I urged.

"Alright alright, well her absolute favourite thing to do was run her hands all over me then kissmealloveruntilIcouldn'ttakeanymoreok?" I laughed out loud at that. She went even redder.

"Wait a sec, she made you?"

"Yep."

"Without." I raised my eyebrows.

"Uhuh." Spencer nodded smiling at what must be a memory.

"Wow she must be..." I paused to imagine what that kind of feeling for someone must do to a person's sex life.

"Stop." Spencer said sternly.

"Huh." I stopped thinking about what it would be like with Nat.

"Thinking about it, it's creepy because you're sat on my bed Jess." She said still slightly red.

"My bad couldn't help it, could you do the..." I paused incase I offended my friend. She looked up at me with the biggest grin on her face.

"For sure, faster too." She smirked at me.

"Jeez Spence I don't need the image you're projecting right now." I cringed. She just laughed at my screwed up face.

"Ok, moving on. Favourite restaurant." I started with the questions again.

"Now it's The River Cafe but before it was this Sky Bar place in LA." She smiled.

"Ok, where does she want to get married?"

"Beach at sunset."

"Romantic, favourite guitar?"

"The first one her Dad gave her when she was 5, its tiny though." I laughed.

"Song?"

"It changes but it's Don't Stop for the most part or any of the Disney tunes, she likes happy songs for the most part." Spence smiled, she clearly hasn't listened to Gold yet, I saw it on her bedside table before. Still wrapped.

"Sweet, fave chord?"

"Anything C related."

"Film."

"Love Actually, but don't tell anyone."

"I won't. Anyway I give you do know a lot about her for having been apart for years, that's for sure." I yawned huge.

"Time for bed me thinks Jessie."

I love when she calls me that, I feel loved.

I dive under her covers making her laugh playfully before climbing in with me.

"I'm too tired to make you move Jessie but I have to be up in... 4 hours for college so be prepared, if I have to be up so do you." She said softly obviously nearly asleep already.

"Night Spence, Love you." I said quietly.

"Same Jessie." she threw her arm around me and hugged me gently before passing out with her head on my back. I followed shortly after thinking of Natalie Freznie once again.

Sweet dreams indeed.

* * *

><p><strong>Just a quick update to follow the date with Spencer and Jess before too much time goes by.<strong>

**Sorry if there are a few mistakes my proof reading sucks.**

**Love you all hope you had an okay Monday xxx**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

**SPOV**

The huge smile that's been playing on my face all day is finally beginning to fade, the happiness ebbing away with every minute of silence.

I've been checking my phone all day. She still hasn't called.

It's nearly 2pm and my classes are over for today but they were pointless for me anyway because my concentration was the worst it's ever been, freshman year was actually better.

This morning was one of the best I've had in a long time. When Jess and I woke up we were able to ignore our sleep deprived state and went to star bucks for breakfast. Jess drove me to school and then went off to her 'thinking spot'.

However after 12pm my day has been slowly getting worse, my class at 12:30 was a disaster, teach sprung a huge project on us, as if we don't have enough to do with our final project. I only have a week to complete this side project though so I guess my final will have to wait a little longer.

On top of this Ashley hasn't called, nothing at first I thought she would be sleeping but then I remembered she always gets up at 12pm if she gets any sort of lie in. It was a deeply ingrained tradition the origins of which lie with her late father so I doubt very much that she would've swept it to the side.

If my day gets any worse I'm holding her and her lack of contact personally responsible I grumbled as I barrelled my way through my front door, dropping all of my books in the process.

'Crap' I thought as they hit the floor with a thud.

I dumped my bag and began to sweep them all up off the floor when a blinking light caught my eye.

It was emanating from the cradle for my landline signalling a voicemail.

I dropped the books instantly and scrambled to press the button hoping it was from Ashley because she had lost my number. My finger paused and hovered above the button, it's very unusual for Ash to lose anything that matters to her so it probably wouldn't be from her.

My shoulders sagged as I remembered this and I pressed the button, waiting patiently to hear my best friend or brothers voice.

I was walking back towards my books when the intro ended and the message began.

"_Hi Spencer it's Kyla here I need you to call me asap please, it's about bye."_

I have never back dialled so fast in my life and before I knew it I could hear Kyla's phone ringin down the line.

_Ring Ring Ring Ring_

"_Spencer, thank god you called."_ Kyla sounded relieved.

"Of course I did Ky, what's wrong? Is Ash okay?" My voice rising as my thoughts turned grim. Instead I heard Kyla chuckle on the other end. I think I actually growled at her.

"_Whoa Spence, chill ya beans she's not dying."_

"Kyla, tell me." I said putting on my best commanding voice.

"_Aye aye Captain Carlin, to be perfectly honest Ashley's sick I'm pretty sure it's the flu but she's pulling all her usual shit."_ Kyla sounded tired just talking about it.

I smiled remembered Ash's stubborn nature when especially when it came to her own wellbeing.

"Same as before?" I asked.

"_Depends, what was she like before?"_ I felt bad as I remembered Kyla wasn't in Ashley's life before Senior year.

"Um, refusal to acknowledge any symptoms, more singing than usual, sleeping all the time and mumbling incoherently that she's fine then trying to live life normally. She even tried to seduce me once." I laughed at the memory of Ashley's bunged up sex voice saying 'I'll show you how fine I am Spence' cue coughing fit.

"_I hope she doesn't try to seduce me." _I laughed along with her at that.

"Me too Kyla, so why do you need me?" I asked still giggling.

"_Well first off every time she wakes up all I can make out are the words call, Spencer and rehearsal. She took a shower earlier while trying to call you, fully clothed with the phone and a random piece of paper that I assume had your number on it. It's mush now as you can imagine. Anyway, I pulled her out but she keeps trying to sing and get dressed for the nonexistent rehearsal she's going to. I'm about to lose my nut." _I cut her off because she was starting to become hysterical.

"KY," I shouted. "Did you call a doctor?" I was worried now.

"_Yes, her came earlier and told me that she has the flu virus and is slightly delirious. He said she would be better in a couple of days so for the concert but that she should rest and drink loads of water. I can't even get her to put on her PJ's, not even the onesie!" _

Onesie, oh I have to see that later. 'Oh my god Spence she's sick and all you can think about is how cute she must look in the onesie' I scolded myself.

"Calm down Kyla, where are you guys? I'm coming round." I didn't ask if I could, I know when I'm needed.

Kyla immediately gave me the hotel room number and I was there within half an hour. Impressive through NYC traffic.

I was outside the room about to knock when the door flew open revealing a very ruffled looking Kyla.

Her hair was everywhere and her makeup was running all over. She definitely looked like she'd pulled someone out of a shower or maybe a hurricane, I'm not sure.

"Thank the lord you're here, she's trying to sing, it's killing me Spence." She said while stepping back to let me enter the suite.

I took a minute to ogle the suite a little, the living area I was in looked out over New York and the kitchen to my right looked fully kitted out. I counted three TV's just in this area and I admired the tasteful cream colour scheme. It was very pretty.

I was dragged out of my perusal by an animated Kyla taking hold of my wrist and leading me towards a small corridor I assumed Ashley's room was down.

"Can you hear that?" Kyla said exasperated.

I didn't have to listen long before I could make out and uneven chord progression being massacred and a weird croaking noise. I pointed in surprise at the door we were now outside of.

"Is that?"

"Yep, terrible isn't it, she's going to ruin her voice." Kyla looked down obviously upset.

"Look Ky, I've done this a few times before so why don't you go out for a bit, maybe go the spa in the hotel yeah?" I said gently.

"Are you sure Spence?" She asked hopefully.

"Yeah Ky go now." I smiled when she went running in the opposite direction to her sister and was out of the door in less than a minute.

Once she was gone I turned back to the ominous door, wincing at the croaking sound of Ash 'singing'.

I put my hand on the handle and slowly pushed the door open shocked at what I saw.

Ash was sitting on top of a suitcase stage randomly strumming a guitar and croaking her way through what I think as meant to be wonderwall. Youch!

I tentatively approached the obviously sick rockstar and when I was within reach I snatched her guitar right out of her arms. I'm going to die for this one.

Her eyes fluttered open and I immediately noticed how hazy they appeared. They were a dull brown and her face was deathly pale.

I carefully placed the guitar on its stand and then carried both out of the door and placed them outside where she couldn't get at them so easily.

When I turned back I saw her mouth gaping at me, shocked at my nerve. She croaked something I couldn't understand so I took it as acceptance of my presence. It was probably the opposite but oh well.

"Hey Ash, I heard your feeling rough." I said it as more of a statement trying not to give her room to argue as I walked over to her and attempted to pull her up.

She felt like a lead weight as I tried to get her on her feet. I gave up when I noticed her knees start to give out. She'd clearly exhausted herself trying to appear normal all day.

Swiftly as I could I put and arm around her back then one under her knew before sweeping her off of her perch and into my arms.

I gasped when I felt her bury her face into my neck and nuzzle it gently. That's when I knew how ill she was really feeling, Ashley Davies does not seek out comfort easily.

I shivered involuntarily when her breath brushed over my neck.

'Concentrate, she's sick.' I scolded myself again; I really need to learn to control my mind when around her.

I squeezed her closer to me and turned around to put her on the bed.

I smiled when she tried to cling to me as I put her down but she passed out almost as soon as her head hit the pillow and she relaxed onto the bed.

Before I could think about I was doing I had found her some PJ's, stripped her down to her underwear (_barely_ looking) and placed her in some comfy pyjamas with penguins on.

Throughout the whole process she didn't stir once so I decided it would be ok to leave for a second and borrowed some swears and a comfy top to change into before cleaning up her bathroom which was covered in water from her earlier escapades.

I didn't realise how long it had taken me so I was stunned when I heard Ashley coughing in the bedroom.

After putting in the plug and turning on the hot water with a little cold I made ran back into the bedroom smiling when Ashley's eyes turned into saucers when she saw me in her clothes.

"Spence?" She croaked, she sounded awful.

"Hey Ash, you still sleepy?" I asked gently while making my way to sit on the side of the bed next to her. Her huge eyes followed me as I did so.

"Hmm." She hummed when I reached out and ran my fingers through her tangled and slightly damp curls.

Her eyes fluttered closed when rubbed her cheek with my thumb and I took the opportunity to press my lips to her hot forehead.

I pulled back to watch her face as I kept running my fingers through her hair massaging her scalp every now and then.

She looked just as pale as before but the small smile on her face told me I was doing things right.

"Ash?" I said pulling her out of her reverie. I smiled when her bleary gaze focussed on my breasts.

"Uhuh?" She said hoarsely.

"I'm running you a bath; do you still like those when you're like this?" I asked, slightly worried I had forgotten something.

My worried were forgotten when her face lit up and she rolled so her head was on my lap. I kept right on with my combing.

"I'll take that as a yes." I said happily as I moved to pick her up once again.

This time was a little different however because instead of burying her face in my neck Ashley started trailing slow but intense kisses all over my neck.

I have no idea how I managed to walk to the bathroom with her doing that but eventually I was putting her feet on the ground and making sure she could stand.

She growled quietly when I pulled away but any sexual undertones were erased when a coughing fit followed almost immediately.

I rubbed her back soothingly as she hacked away.

When she was finally done coughing I went to turn the taps off and test the water.

Once I had confirmed it was too cold for me but hot enough to create a little steam I knew it was perfect. Lighting the vanilla scented candle on the side near the sink I turned back to a swaying Ashley.

I put my hands on either side of her face to hold her attention and rubbed my thumbs soothingly back and forth across her cheek bones.

"Ash, I want you to soak in here for a while, the steam will help with your cough and the bubbles will cover you up so I can come in and sit with you if you want." I said.

"Yeaaah." She nodded frantically while grinding out her answer.

"Ok."I smiled, dropped my hands and headed for the door only to be pulled back by a sweaty hand in mine.

"No... I... Meant... Siiit with... Me. Pwease Shpencor." She sounded very poorly even to my untrained ears so I pulled her into my arms, wishing I could make her feel better instantly.

"I will Ash, I'm just going to get us some water and sandwiches plus you need to get changed." I said kindly into her ear, I didn't miss the shivers but I'm not sure if they were me or her apparent fever.

I left her then and when I came back she was safely under the bubbles, I laughed when I saw the bubbles in her hair. She looked like a little kid slapping her hands together to make them fly.

I sat down next to the tub and opened a bottle of water, handing it to her. She downed most of it in one letting it sooth her aching throat.

When she turned to me smiling I couldn't help but grin in return. Just happy to be near her. I noticed a small bottle of shampoo and grabbed it, holding it out to her as a question.

"Spence, would you?" She trailed off looking down at the bubbles clearly embarrassed at her request. I didn't say anything, instead I popped the cap on the shampoo and squeezed some into my hand.

I could see Ashley's eyes watering as she looked up at me when I knelt up to wash her hair for her.

My vision became blurry as I started the intimate routine I had perfected long ago.

When Ash started to moan quietly I decided it was time to end the moment and I showered the shampoo out of her hair. She relaxed back onto the shoulder cushion once I'd finished and closed her eyes.

I spent a few seconds just looking at her before sitting down alongside her, our heads level because of my extra few inches.

I leant back against the wall next to the tub and closed my eyes inhaling the calming scent of vanilla and steam.

My eyes flew open when I felt a drip on my hand but I just grinned when I saw Ashley reaching determinedly for my right hand nearly falling out of the tub trying to grab it.

She hadn't noticed me watching her and I could almost hear her saying to herself. 'Just a couple more inches.'

I raised my hand to grasp her wet one when I realised she was close to revealing herself over the side of the tub.

She looked up smiling sheepishly before I used my other hand to push her back into the tub.

We sat there with our hands resting on the side of the tub until I noticed goosebumps on Ashley's arms.

I pulled my hand out of hers ignoring her groan of protest and pushed myself up off of the floor grabbing her a towel off the rack beside me as I did so.

"Ash," I said as I placed the towel on the toilet seat. "I'm leaving this here and I'll be waiting for you out there with some food because you need to eat."

I didn't leave any room for her to argue with me I just left the bathroom quickly to find her some new PJ's because the last ones would be a little grimy, taking the sandwiches with me.

I couldn't help but stare when Ashley stumbled out of the bathroom already yawning sweetly.

She took the pyjamas from my hands and went back into the bathroom to change.

I was still recovering from the sight of her in just a towel when she reappeared, I was happy to see a little more colour in her face this time.

She went straight for the ham sandwiches on the end table and munched happily while I just sat on the end of the bed and watched.

When she had wolfed down three sandwiches she yawned and I decided to interfere before she passed out where she stood.

"C'mon Ash time for bed honey." I said walking over to her and pulling her smaller frame into mine. _Huge mistake_.

"Bed huh Spence?" She whispered, her voice even huskier than usual going straight through me in the best way.

"Yes, you need sleep." I said as firmly as I could, trying to pull her towards to bed. She held her arm tightly around me and I brought my hands to the back of her neck.

"Hmm, nope I need something else." She husked but I could hear the exhaustion in her voice. Playing along would get me what I wanted so I leant into her even further and pressed myself into her, I heard her breath hitch when I whispered into her ear.

"Tell me what you need baby?" I lowered my voice deliberately while stepping carefully backwards, she stepped with me easily not even realising we were moving her mind still hazy and tired.

"I I need you Spence, always." She said so softly, I melted.

"You have me baby." I said gently and used our momentum to propel us around so her back was to the bed.

"I do." She said hopefully, she was shaking slightly, and I put my hand to her forehead feeling her fever increasing.

"You always have and always will." I said while moving her back onto the bed and urging her backwards and under the covers.

When I moved to back up off of the bed she grabbed my wrists and made me fall chest first into the bed.

"Ash, what the hell?" I said.

"Stay, please. I don't feel good." I felt so bad for her as I saw her bright red cheeks and felt her clammy palms against my forearms.

"Of course just let me borrow some PJ's okay?" She nodded at me and let go of my wrists and coughing again.

I noticed her breathing sounded congested when I returned dressed in shorts and a t shirt with only my bra underneath. I can't get comfy in bed if I'm wearing underwear, something Ash loved and something I prayed she wouldn't remember right now.

One look at her curled up and whimpering I knew I would have nothing to worry about.

I climbed under the covers and handed her the freezing cold water bottle which she slowly sipped from before pressing it to her forehead.

I grabbed the Advil off of the bedside table and gave her two of those hoping they would help with the congestion.

She pulled me closer once she put the water bottle down next to her and I sat up so I wouldn't fall asleep.

Again her head landed on my lap and my fingers found her hair combing through slowly.

Her breathing evened out slowly and I continued my ministrations because every time I paused she would stir and grumble incoherently.

I only made out one thing while I was smiling down at her glowing face and it almost made me cry.

She whispered it more than once too.

However the first time she said it was the best by far because come back from the spa and was busy taking a picture of us both looking so sweet.

"_Spence Spence,"_ She had whispered urgently, _"I love you, I...love..."_

Tears had welled up in my eyes and Kyla had snapped us at the moment I was kissing her sweaty forehead.

Once Kyla left us alone I sat there for hours waiting for Ashley's fever to break and only when it did I feel calm enough to slowly lie down next to her.

Even sick she curled herself into my side and her head rested in the crook on my neck. I could've sworn I felt a light kiss against my neck as I drifted off smiling.

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><p><strong>Thank you for every review I'm touched how many people bother to let me know their feelings good and bad.<strong>

**Let me know what you think of their interaction, I'm trying to improve my writing.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

**APOV**

I may be weak.

I may have a huge headache.

Every muscle might be screaming at me.

My throat may feel as if someone's sandpapered it.

Overall I have shit loads wrongs with me right now.

But I have never felt happier.

The moment I woke up I remembered where I was and who I was with (or curled into). Yesterday is incredibly blurry but one thing/person remains very clear in my mind.

When she picked me up and cradled me in her arms I thought I was going to start sobbing, I felt truly awful. Then she washed my hair and held my hand so even my fever faded into nothingness.

With just her touch she made my whole world brighter.

All I feel now is bliss, total bliss (and maybe a little pain).

Or at least as blissful as you can feel when you consumed two bottles of water and are desperate to pee.

If you could see where I am situated you wouldn't want to move either. My head is practically sandwiched between Spencer's chin and breasts and I'm curled as close to her as I can get. Her right arm is draped over me, her hand near my waist while her left hand is still tangled in my hair at the back of my head.

My head is throbbing in sync with my pulse and I know I should get up, take some paracetamol and pee but I just do not want this to ever end.

I don't know how long I've been lying here listening to Spencer's heart beating against mine but I find myself hoping she doesn't wake up anytime soon.

**SPOV**

This is ridiculous; I can't just perv on her without her knowing, she's asleep and sick, it's just wrong (I think?).

From the clock I've been focussing on I can see that I've been awake for nearly half an hour just letting Ashley's heart beat against mine and breath on my chest drive me fucking crazy.

I rarely swear but this is getting ridiculous, less than twelve hours ago I was holding her in my arms and making sure she didn't fall and die while delirious.

I should stop thinking about her body next to mine and focus on making sure she gets better. I suppose it wouldn't be a crime to wait until she wakes up naturally though.

I fell back into my thoughts content to just enjoy our moment.

**APOV**

I stopped breathing and my heart rate sky rocketed when I felt Spencer's hand move gently through my hair.

I hummed my appreciation before I could stop myself and I felt Spencer take a quick breath probably surprised that I'm awake.

I smiled to myself and opened my eyes to look up at her guiltily.

"Sp...Spence." I smiled at how I had to force words out of my throat. The pain was horrible but the tenderness that appeared in Spencer's eyes was worth any pain. I saw something else in there too but I looked away and kissed her sternum gently before I was consumed.

"Shush Ash you shouldn't use your voice too much." She whispered to me gently but I heard her heart speed up as my lips brushed her skin.

"I know... but... I... want to talk... to you." I squeezed out.

"I'm sure you do, but you can't anyway I was kinda enjoying the, erm, silence." She sounded guilty, maybe that's not all she was enjoying.

I grinned up at her cheekily and from her blush I knew I had guessed correctly, she was enjoying this just as much as I would have been if I didn't feel crappy.

I was desperate to take advantage but I kept wincing every time I so much as twitched and Spencer picked up on my discomfort straight away. Damn.

**SPOV**

I knew she was trying to hide how she was feeling but I can still read her like a book. With my heart still a little out of control and my breathing borderline erratic I insisted we get up.

She attempted to push me down but she was still really weak.

The moment she was up she pegged it to the bathroom and I was worried until I remembered she was probably desperate to pee from the water, so I went to make us some breakfast. I just hope she still likes the same thing when she's not well.

**APOV**

I sighed in relief when I made it to the toilet at last. I felt a little more like myself today but when I stood up, my vision darkened and my head spun so I decided to not get my hopes up.

I threw on some sweats and a t-shirt and made my way out of my bedroom, following the delicious scent that had just permeated my thick head.

I reached the Kitchen in record time considering I kept coughing and having to lean against a wall. The enticing smell kept me going though.

**SPOV**

I was relieved to see that Kyla had stocked the fridge with everything I needed and more and I had just finished up the last banana pancake when I heard coughing and heavy footsteps stumbling towards me.

When she emerged from the little corridor to my right I almost ran to her. She looked paler than she had in bed and she was still shaking and rubbing her throat but I knew she wouldn't appreciate me coddling her anymore she is still a stubborn mule when she's sick and I don't want to push it.

Instead of moving I gripped the counter and watched her eyes brighten when she caught sight of the pile of pancakes.

Her gaze travelled across the countertop and then dropped to the floor before running up my entire body. When she actually met my eyes my breath hitched at how dark her eyes had become. This was the point at which she'd tried to seduce me the last time she was sick when we were together so I braced myself, my knuckles white on the counter.

So my shock was understandable when she simply stumbled over to the plate and started eating the pancakes with her bare hands.

It took me a few seconds to register her actions but once I had I reacted.

"Get a plate Ash that's disgusting!" I said, she looked up at me with swollen hamster cheeks and I laughed at the piece of banana stuck to her cheek and reached out to wipe it away.

She openly stared at me as I got rid of the banana it was a cute moment and I couldn't help but return the smile she tried to shoot me despite her full mouth.

She wasn't trying to talk which amazed me, this was not normal sick Ashley, did she, listen to me?

I grabbed the second plate I'd hidden under the counter and moved to the sofa ignoring the hand that tried to steal my pancakes as I passed by Ashley.

I shot her a look over my shoulder and she picked up her own plate to follow me.

A few hours, pancakes and scrubs episodes later I was flat on my back with Ash snoozing on my chest once more. She was beginning to wheeze slightly which meant I needed to get Kyla to call the doc again because Ash needs meds to get well before Friday.

I vaguely heard my phone ringing from the bedroom so I gently eased my out from under Ashley and ran to catch the call before it rang off.

"Heello?" I said cheerfully.

"_Hey Spence, where the hell are you? Are you coming in tonight?"_ My best friend sounded worried.

"Shit, sorry Jess I forgot to call, I'm at Ashley's."

"_WHAT? You guys... already... huh?"_ She cut me off before I could explain.

"She got sick Jess, I'm helping Kyla out by looking after her, she can be a stubborn bitch when she's sick." I explained.

"_Oh, oooooh, that's sweet. How is she?"_ Jess asked, calmer now.

"She's not good it looks like flu but her fever broke last night slash this morning so she's just a bit rough now, thanks for asking."

"_No problem, will you be in for your shift Spence?"_ I'd forgotten about that, I eyed the clock realising there was only a few hours left before I needed to be at Moon. I still haven't started that damn extra project either. Shucks!

"Yeah I need to be there I haven't worked since last Friday." I said.

"_Thanks Spence, I know it's only a Wednesday but Nat's playing tonight so it might be busier than usual."_ I heard Jess's voice brighten when she mentioned Nat and I smiled.

"I'll be there Jess, wouldn't want you to have to work instead of ogling Nat all night would we?"

"_You suck Spence." _She grumbled.

"I love you too Jessie, see you in a few, bye." I hung up after she said her goodbye and made my way back to Ash.

I can at least spend some more time cuddling on the sofa with my favourite duvet before I have to leave for work. The bar opens mid afternoon on weekdays.

I loved how her sleepy expression brightened when her eyes found mine as I wandered back to the sofa.

I so don't want to have to work today.

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><p><strong>Just a short one to tide you guys over while I sort through my extra ideas for the next story line.<strong>

**All the reviews mean a ridiculous amount to me andI can't believe I have so many.**

**I was really happy to see the return of some reviewers I hadn't heard from in a while, it's nice to know I didn't lose you guys.**

**Thanks xxx**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**APOV**

God I am sooo whipped, I'm lucky she doesn't quite realise that I would literally kiss her feet after she'd run a marathon if she so desired.

When I was rudely awakened by Spencer's phone and subsequent departure of my pillow from beneath my head I thought for one horrible second that she would have to leave right then. I thought I'd slept through our time together, stupid sickness.

I had rolled onto my back in her absence and listened to the rumble of my breath in my chest wondering if this will affect my MSG performance in two days. Fortunately I was broken from my depressing thoughts by the return of the beautiful blond currently dressed in **my** clothes.

I blinked sleepily trying to clear my eyes for a better look at the sliver of skin between the waistband of her sweats and what is now my favourite T-shirt ever.

She didn't notice the turn of my thoughts because she was too busy making her way back over to me with a slight frown on her face. I have to do something about that, she should always be smiling.

"Spence, what's wrong?" I spoke painfully.

She looked up at men and returned the bright smile I shot her. That's better.

"Nothing major Ash, I just forgot I need to put in an appearance at work in a few hours."

A few... What? I looked at the clock on the wall behind Spencer and did a double take at the time.

"Its 4pm already, we only just had breakfast." My stomach rumbled loudly, effectively negating my statement. Spencer just laughed at my shock.

"Haha, yeah you needed the sleep though, you look a little better but you still sound like shit." She looked worried.

"This shit made me millions thank you very much." I said sarcastically, unfortunately the lighter atmosphere that joke was supposed to bring about was ruined by my ill-timed wheezy coughing fit.

"That's it I'm calling the doctor, where's your phone Ash?" I hadn't even noticed her rush over to me and sit by my stomach on the sofa.

She proceeded to prop me up on a pillow, lifting my torso easily, it's not wrong that I'm turned on my how strong she is now; she lifted my whole body like a piece of paper yesterday.

"No," I choked out, "No doctor it's a cough I'm **fine**." I insisted, wow this wheezing is a real mood killer.

The wheezing stopped suddenly but only because Spencer had quickly placed her left hand in between my breasts and pushed down. Obviously trying to kill me because my breathing had stopped altogether.

"Baby, breathe for me." She whispered.

Without hesitation my body inhaled of its own accord. I heard the whip crack.

"Oh god I can actually feel how bad you breathing is." Spencer looked at me with panic in her eyes.

I placed my hand over hers a squeezed her fingers with mine.

"Spence, it's not that bad." I tried again, no coughing fit this time luckily.

"_YES_ it is Ash you have two day until your dream concert so you're going to tell me where your phone is and I am going to call the doctor and you are going to lie here while he examines you." She said firmly leaving no room for my lame arguments; it was such a turn on.

I stared into her eyes and smirked at her letting her know how her words affected me. She leant closer, probably unconsciously and I strained my neck to whisper in her ear.

"I'll see the damn doctor on one condition." My voice lower than usual her hand pushed down harder on my chest fingertips curling into me slightly and she shivered almost unnoticeably. I felt ready to continue.

"Kiss me?" I asked, I would beg if I had to but I tried not to let my desperation show in my voice.

She pulled back slightly as I rested my head back on the cushion she'd placed behind me and stared hard into her eyes.

When she smirked at me and started to lean in slowly my heart instantly began to beat itself to death. I kept my eyes open not wanting to lose the contact we had for a second.

When her lips were only an inch away she stopped moving and I couldn't help the growl that shook my chest at her teasing. Her smirk just intensified and her eyes fluttered closed.

I trembled when I felt her free hand cup my cheek and her thumb stroke across my cheek bone.

My eyes closed of their own accord and I leant into the electric touch.

A gasp escaped my lips as hers descended on mine unexpectedly and Spencer proceeded to kiss the life out of me.

As her lips moved softly over mine, her hands still on me I reached out to her waist and pulled her into me.

I moaned when she climbed on top of me never breaking away from my lips and pressing the entire length of her body against mine.

When my lungs began to burn far too soon I groaned in frustration and ran my hands up to Spencer's cheeks to pull her away gently.

She looked into my eyes confused until I rolled my head as far away as I could, covered my mouth and tried not to cough both my lungs up at once.

I missed her body when she climbed off of me but me chest was burning. I couldn't help but smile through the pain; my lips were still tingling from Spencer's delicious assault.

**SPOV**

I rubbed her back and chest in gentle circles as she hacked into her hand, her eyes watering from the pressure.

I should be feeling guilty but the smile somehow still on Ashley's face told me we had nothing to regret.

I saw her pointing to something on the coffee and I sighed when I realised she was gesturing to her phone.

Once she had calmed down sufficiently I lay her back against the cushion and grabbed her phone, leaving the room to call the doctor listed in her phonebook.

**APOV**

"Ahhhhhh what the hell?" I shouted as the cold metal of the stupid stethoscope the idiot someone calls a _doctor_ was digging into my back.

"Sorry Miss Davies but I have to hear your breathing to diagnose." His stupid gentle voice just irritated me more.

"I don't care I..."

"_Ashley_, shut up and let the man work." Spencer said from the other side of the room, I was still on the sofa. She frowned at me but I just stuck my tongue out at her.

"Mature Ash." She smiled then giggled when I jumped as the cold metal went waaaay further down my top than I deemed appropriate. As quickly as it was there the smile on Spencer's face disappeared replaced with deep frown at the doc.

"What are you doing?" She practically growled at the doc I smirked at her face, someone's jealous.

"Now now Spence let the doctor work." I grinned at her cheekily.

She stuck her tongue out at me and I laughed out loud, it was fun until I started coughing again.

"Miss Davies you need to get a lot more rest I think you have a chest infection probably as a result of a low immune system caused by your fever the last two days."

"Will she be ok doctor?" Spencer asked before I could, I smiled at how worried she was about me.

"She'll be fine," He smiled at the sappy look on my face and I returned it, maybe he's not so stupid after all. "It may be bacterial so I'm going to prescribe antibiotics just in case but I'm also going to give you a ventolin inhaler, it should solve the wheezing problem."

"I have a concert Friday; will I be ok to sing?"I was worried now, this sounds worse than I thought.

"Yes, if you rest your voice and body your voice will be fine as early as tomorrow. Your girlfriend clearly took very good care of you because your fever is completely gone now." He said writing my prescriptions in his messy handwriting.

"I'm erm I..." Spencer stuttered, red as a tomato I smiled at her nerves.

"Yes she did doc, I'm lucky to have her." I smiled up at her from my spot and she looked down bashfully.

"Hmm well I hope you make a full recovery by Friday but if any of this gets any worse especially any chest pain call me or head to an emergency room." He said handing me my prescriptions before making his way out of the suite.

Spencer held the door for him then turned to me with a frown on her face.

I opened my mouth but she cut me off.

"Ah ah ah, you are not allowed to talk." She said still frowning at me from the door.

I beckoned her to me, wondering why she was frowning.

"It's not you." She said quietly once she reached my side. I swear this girl can read my mind.

I tilted my head to the side silently asking her what's wrong.

"You're sick." I smiled at her statement of the obvious, my eyes relayed the message.

"You're sick and I have to leave in less than an hour." She expanded.

I sat up and grabbed her hands which were anxiously picking at her/my t-shirt and rubbed my thumbs over her knuckles while pulling her down so her face was level with mine.

My eyes drilled into hers trying to convey just how okay I was going to be until she was able to return.

When the worry didn't leave her eyes I brushed my lips over hers gently before leaning across and sucking on her earlobe. I smiled against her neck when she moaned quietly.

"Get that look off of your face Ash I get it, you'll be fine without me here." I brought my face back in front of hers only to see her eyes were closed and she had a smile on her face. How the hell did she know I was smirking?

"You always were smug when you teased me." She paused and my eyes widened when she pressed her lips against mine only to pull away before I could reciprocate.

Her eyes opened and she giggles at the shocked look on my face. I quickly tried to neutralise my expression only making her giggle more.

"I know you well honey." I melted at the name and her tone.

"Aw you're adorable when you get all lovey on me." She teased again, 'I'll show her lovey' I thought and leant forward again only to be stopped by a hand on my chest.

"Nope, you cannot _show me_ how lovey you can be Ash, I have to go get your prescriptions before I need to be at work." She said gently, I'm going to miss her so much.

"Me too Ash, don't look so damn sad I'll be back." She said the last part in a silly voice, trying to cheer me up. It worked.

"There's my smile, now lie down, watch TV and _chill_ while I go and get these." She retracted her hands and grabbed the prescriptions I'd dropped on the floor.

She pushed me back down with my free hand and I grinned at her boldness.

"You have such a dirty mind." She smiled when she caught the look I was giving her. Then she made her way out of my suite. I miss her already.

**SPOV**

Damn I can't believe I'm getting dressed for work. It took the pharmacy ages to fill Ashley's prescriptions and once I got back to her hotel and into her suite I was already going to late for work.

"Spence hun you need to get the lost puppy look off your face, I don't need my customers to catch depression from your ugly mug." Jess chuckled when I jumped at her presence in my room.

"Thanks Jessica that's really nice of you to say." I said sarcastically.

"Oh Spence I thought you were just a little sad but you really miss her don't you?" Jess sounded concerned.

"I'll be fine Jess I need to carry on with my life as normal I can't change everything for her." I forced a smile.

"Spence she's not asking you to, your just worried cause she's poorly sick." Jess said.

"I know I know, I just miss her so much already, how are my feelings still this strong after so much time." I said my hand flailing in frustration.

"Don't worry Spence, she'll be fine and your feelings will not ever fade it's a small emotional response to something random called _the love of your life_." She said with a cheeky grin.

"Ok I get it, I'm being overly sappy over this but she didn't deny when the doc assumed I was her girlfriend but she hasn't asked me out or anything." I said, finally getting some feelings off my chest.

"You want my opinion on all this." Jess asked and I nodded.

"Well, I don't think girlfriend is a strong enough phrase for what you two are to each other lifelong partner or forever person, something along those lines anyway. You want each other, that's all that matters and it's great that someone who's never even seen you two together before was able to pick up on the loving vibes. Stop over thinking this Spence and let's get to work so you can back to your unofficial _girlfriend_." She said firmly.

I teared up at her kind words.

"C'mon Spence don't cry on me now, we gotta work." She said looking a little uncomfortable; she probably thinks she said something wrong.

"You're the best friend **ever** Jessie." I said while wrapping her arms around her to give her a hug.

"Er thanks Spence, you're pretty awesome too." She said sounded relieved.

"C'mon you sap let's get to your incredibly successful bar." I said pulling back and heading for my front door.

"Erm Spence, shoes would be a great idea, don't you think?" She said, I just laughed.

_State the obvious  
>I didn?t get my perfect fantasy<br>I realized you love yourself  
>More that you could ever love me<em>

It's rare that Nat sings country but tonight she had been rocking the country vibe with all sorts of random songs.

So go and tell your friends  
>That I'm obsessive and crazy<br>That's fine, I'll tell mine  
>You're gay and by the way<p>

I hate that stupid old pickup truck  
>You never let me drive<br>You're a redneck, heartbreak  
>Who's really bad at lying<p>

She was really on it tonight and I saw Jess had really noticed the extra effort tonight. Jess was sat at my end of the bar on the bar and was entirely focussed on the Hawaiian beauty singing her heart out on stage.

Burn, burn, burn, baby burn  
>Just another picture to burn<br>Baby burn

When Nat finished what was her last song before her break she caught Jess's eye over the crowd and smiled warmly obviously seeking my best friends honest opinion.

I saw Jess grin and clap her hands high in the air to show her approval. They are so cute I know they will be a sickening couple but I will just have to live.

Nat looked down bashfully before Josh came onstage to entice the crowd with his new mixes, that boy needs to be producing music.

"Hey Spence," Jess called out to me, I looked up from my customer. "You guys ok if I take a break."

I grinned at her obvious nerves, she is so going to go _congratulate _Nat.

"Yeah Jess we will be just fine without you." I said winking at her.

She smiled at my look and left through the door behind the bar, I hope it all goes well between them. Maybe I should check it out.

"Heya Spence, how's life?" I heard the voice and my heart sank.

"Nat what are you doing out here already?" I said sadly.

"What, I'm only after a drink, did I do something wrong Spence, are you mad at me?" I realised how bad I'd sounded.

"Sorry Nat I'm not mad I was just hoping you would wait to see Jess for a little bit." I said without thinking.

"Wha... She went to see me?" Nat said gaping at me.

"Um I um, yes." Is aid guiltily, I may have just given the game away badly.

"Ok, why are you acting all weird about this Spencer?" She asked eyeing me.

"What are you on about? I'm absolutely fine Jess probably just wanted to ask you about playing again this week." I said, trying to save my own life from my best friend.

"Sure Spence, so it's not because she's totally hot for me and you finally tried to make her realise that small fact." Nat grinned, she was totally messing with me earlier, I breathed a sigh of relief.

"You know about that huh?" I asked.

"Yup but I've accepted that she won't ever do anything about what's between us." Nat said looking down at the bar sadly.

"Nat, why don't you make a move then?" I said.

"Cause Spence," she said frustrated. "One. She's my boss. Two. Something happened to her I can see it in her eyes and I don't want to overstep with anything and three. She doesn't feel the way I do about her." Nat said her eyes welling up, tat's whe I finally saw it.

"Oh my god, you're in love with her!" I gasped. Nat looked down a tear escaping the corner of her eye. I ignored the customers and leapt over the bar to hug my friend.

"Oh honey I had no idea it was so strong this soon." I said gently and she looked at me in surprise.

"What do you mean soon?" She scoffed. "I loved her from the first time she hugged me and told me she would love for me to play at her bar all the time all day." I smiled at her obvious frustration at how long it has been.

"I know how you feel Nat, is this why you haven't taken those deals from LA?" I asked looking into her eyes.

"Maybe?" She said like it was a question, she looked very guilty.

"Oh Nat it's _fine_ that you feel that way, that's real love. You should ask her out!" I told her.

"I can't Spence, what if she rejects me then fires me for being a perv?" She looked appalled at my suggestion.

"What if I told you to just make a small move, see how she reacts then go for it?" I asked trying to make something stick.

"That sounds... Good?" Nat said thoughtfully.

"I know right, you two are perfect for each other, your both stupidly stubborn." I froze when I realised my slip up, this is not my night.

"_Spencer_, how do you know Jess is stubborn about this, HAVE YOU SPOKENT O HER ABOUT ME?" She got more worked up as she carried off.

"Holy crap, no why would you say that Nat, you know I'm her best friend I know her very well and she's a stubborn person, just like you." I tried miserably to cover my ass.

"Because you're clearly an awesome friend to us both, I'm going to let that one go Spence but try to cure yourself of that serious case of foot in mouth disease you have."

"Oh god, just make a damn move already this is _killing_ me!" I said tiredly.

"Spence chill I'll go backstage and try to find her now I can at least check her out while she's congratulating me on my performance." She said teasingly.

I groaned and pushed her sorry ass away from me.

"Just go Nat; we'll talk more about this tomorrow." I told her as she stalked off towards the back door.

I sighed, only two hours to go before the end of my shift, and then I can go see my girlfriend/not girlfriend/life person. Whatever, I just want to see her now.

Time goes so slow when you miss someone.

* * *

><p><strong>Let me know whether or not you want me to make more of this Jess and Nat stuff. I've written loads but I don't know if you guysthe audience want to read about some random made up couple.**

**Enough of my rambling, loads more dramam about to happen in the upcoming chapters so yeah.**

**Thanks for every read, review, lovely comment or whatever, You are all _awesome_!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

**APOV**

"Aaash stop moping and get your head in the game." Kyla said.

We've been sitting either side of the coffee table in the suites lounge playing random card games. You have to hand it to my sibling she immediately knew I needed something to take my mind off of. Damn it not again, Spencer's even got my thoughts whipped, it's sad really.

I gestured to the jumbled pile of cards, my way of saying go fish. I have decided to just suck up my pride and stay completely silent until sound check on Friday. So far it's not been too difficult but Kyla could talk the hind leg off a donkey so it's not like I have to work at it right now.

"What do you want Ash?" Kyla asked.

I held up four fingers and paired it with my signature cheeky smirk. Kyla growled at my face menacingly and yanked three cards out of her hand and held them out to me.

I had to tug them out of her grip and she stuck her tongue out at me and huffed as she sat back in her spot.

"Ok ok you win its five to five now we need a new game to play Ash." She whined.

I grabbed the little whiteboard and pen and wrote down a few suggestions before handing it to Kyla for her to pick.

"Texas Hold em, Rummy, Pontoon, Whist, Kyla sucks... Hey that's mean." She laughed.

I grinned at her while nodding down at the rest of the list waiting for her to finish.

"Let's see. Kyla sucks, nice Ash. Major ass, I'm bored, swimming, wait you want to go swimming in hotel pool which probably contains millions of infections. I'm sorry sis but your immune system is weak enough without exposing you to more crap." She said gently.

Damn I'm so bored with being ill.

"Sorry Ash you need to stay in today and tomorrow you'll be alright sis you can still play your guitar and write songs. You just can't sing out loud." Kyla has a point with that one.

I nodded and leant back against the sofa, the inhaler had stopped my wheezing and I felt a hell of a lot better than I did yesterday.

"Aw Ash you really miss her don't you." She said trying to sound mean but failing miserably.

I just nodded forlornly in her direction.

"Is she coming back?" She asked. I shrugged, Spencer mentioned they might close really late tonight which I assume means that she might not want to come back here so late.

Kyla's phone began to buzz on the table; she glanced at the screen, picked it up then climbed off of the floor to take the call in another room.

I thought it might be about cancelling my concert on Friday so I dragged myself over and put my ear to her bedroom door on the opposite side of the room. I could hear her talking and for once I was glad she speaks like she needs people in Australia to hear.

"Hey Spencer how's work?" She said cheerfully, why was Spence calling Kyla?

"Ha yeah she's exactly the same as you then, are you calling to check on the patient?" She laughed at something Spence said; I wish I could hear both sides.

"She's getting better thank god I think she'll be ok for Friday, thanks for getting those prescriptions by the way." Kyla stopped talking to listen to Spencer.

"Spence you both want you to be here, it doesn't matter what time you get off of work you know that." Go Kyla.

"Then climb into bed with her while she's asleep, you used to sneak in and do that anyways." Ky knew about that, oops.

"I know, I always laughed at you guys, you thought you were being so sneaky. Some of it I wish I hadn't heard though, why couldn't you have gone into her room more huh?" Oh my freakin' god, I cannot believe Kyla is doing this to me, Spencer is never going to have sex with me on a dining room table again.

"Spence, don't apologize I had sex on Ashley's bed a couple of times to get you guys back." Kyla laughed evilly and I put my hand to my forehead in disgust.

"Maybe I changed them, maybe I didn't Spence, you'll never know!" Kyla is the devil incarnate.

"Spence chill, anyway back to the real issue here. I already left a key in reception with your name on so just finish out your shift then come back here. Let yourself in and be with your girl." I love my sister; this may even override the bed thing.

"Aw Spence you're so cute when you're trying to be all mad at me when you really love me for this." Evil Kyla is back.

"Nah she doesn't know, I'll put her to bed," I am not a child Kyla I can sing myself to sleep thank you very much. "It'll be a nice surprise." She finished, I ran back to my previous spot while they said their goodbyes.

When Kyla re-emerged I asked her who it was with my whiteboard, trying to act nonchalant.

"Ash I know you were listening don't try that innocent act with me." She said sternly.

I looked down guiltily.

"Ashley don't worry I am not going to cancel your concert unless you die, I figure you can always go out onstage and just croak for the entire time, at least that your fans will appreciate your presence and you could then reschedule for another time personally with them." She smiled, always thinking about PR that girl.

I grinned at her, sending a silent thank you which she received with a nod.

"Anyway I'm sure you heard the rest of the conversation, Spencer is so easy to wind up, then again she was always the one messing with you huh?" Kyla laughed at my angry face.

That's so true. I was always the one trying to make sarcastic comments but Spencer was able to one-up me like no one else. The banter Spencer and I used to share is one of the things I miss most about our relationship.

"Sorry to interrupt this reminiscing sesh you got going on there Ash but you need to sleep." I gave her a look.

"I know it's early Ash but you need to rest up, plus we both know you're going to want to spend all day with Spence tomorrow, didn't you sleep all through today?" She knew she had me with that one.

She held out her hand to me and I took it, letting her pull me up and towards my room.

When we got to my door she pulled me into a hug.

"I'm happy for you both Ash, if you need our help again just let me know ok?" She said, pulling back a little to see my face.

I smiled at her and nodded, hopefully I will be able to keep her myself this time. Still have to work the whole album recording thing out though.

"Goodnight sis." She said quietly.

"Night." I mouthed before opening the door to my room and getting ready for bed.

I woke up startled when my bed moved weirdly. The first thing I noticed was the darkness; it must be the really early hours of the morning. Then I heard a faint "Oh _fuck_," from behind me on the other side of the bed.

I flipped over quietly and giggled at the faint out line I could see of Spencer trying to get changed into her PJ's in the pitch black room, with only the glow of faint streetlights through the curtains to help.

She hadn't even noticed me giggle because she was busy swearing under her breath at my apparently 'toe killing motherfucker' of a bed.

I closed my eyes and hoped she wouldn't notice I had flipped over when I heard her stop muttering and yawn deeply. I smiled; she must have really missed me if to have made the journey all the way back here when her apartment is literally on top of her workplace.

The bed dipped and I felt a rush of cold air hit me as she climbed in beside me being careful not to touch me. She probably didn't want to wake me up, time to take matters into my own hands.

I opened my eyes only to find Spencer's face an inch away. I jerked backwards out of shock but recovered quickly when her lips met mine.

The kiss stayed chaste because I knew how tired she must be, but it still electrified me to the end of my toes. I totally get what Zuko was on about.

I pulled back slowly, my chest still preventing the kiss from lasting as long as usual but Spencer didn't seem to mind.

I reached out and put my hand around her waist quickly pulling her into me before she could resist.

"Aaash." She said in a warning voice.

I caught her eyes trying to convey that I wasn't coming on to her; I just need to be near her.

She must've understood because her hand felt its way from my shoulder down my side to my hip before gripping and pulling my body closer to hers.

She shuffled towards me at the same time causing our entire bodies to meet somewhere in the middle. I heard Spencer hum and wondered if this position was getting to her as much as it was getting to me, my bad maybe I would come onto her just a little?

Suddenly I felt the desire to be a little bit of a tease towards Spencer after all, I still need to get her back for earlier on the sofa.

I moved down slowly making sure my body rubbed against every inch of hers, I was sure I felt her breath hitch when I tucked my head under her chin bringing us even closer than before.

I pressed a lingering kiss to her throat and began to work my way around to the side of her neck. I let my hand trace patterns over her side, barely touching her skin as my fingers brushed over her soft skin.

I heard her whimper when I nibbled at a sensitive spot on her neck. I had to force myself not to react and keep up the torturously slow pace I was working at.

"So this is how you repay me for earlier huh?" She asked breathlessly when my fingers brushed over the side of her breast and joined my mouth at her neck pulling her nearer to me still.

I grinned against her skin and lightly nipped at the overly sensitive spot near her ear in reply.

Her body jerked at the touch and she gripped my shoulder and rolled me onto my back quickly throwing her right leg over me effectively straddling me.

I was so shocked I didn't even notice her trace down my arms to find my hands in the dark until she wove her fingers through mine and pinned my hands to the pillow either side of my head.

I swallowed thickly when I saw the look in her eyes, a mixture of desire and mirth I had never seen on her before. I really hope she's doesn't find me funny.

"So I hear from Kyla that you aren't making a sound until Friday?" She said neutrally, I studied her suspiciously and nodded.

"Not a sound?" She asked an evil smirk forming on her beautiful face, my heart began to race when I realised what she was getting at. I shook my head at her but couldn't help that grin that took over my face now that I realised her position on top of me.

I arched my back to rub against her but she just moved away slightly, making me frown.

"Would you talk for me?" She said and I shook my head, still grinning as she got closer again.

She leant forward letting her weight push me into the mattress; it felt so good my eyes rolled back at the sensation.

"_Moan?"_ She asked in a whisper, my eyes widened in shock but I shook my head again once I'd recovered.

"_Hmm, I bet I could make you."_ I shivered at the lust in her voice and she laughed lightly probably realising what she was doing to me. I fought the urge to say her name.

She brought her face close to mine and rubbed her nose along my jaw gently before going up press a lingering kiss on my forehead. Every time she moved her body would rub slightly against mine, driving me crazy.

When she started kissing my neck I nearly moaned her name but stopped myself just in time. I would have slammed my hand over my mouth but she still had them pinned.

"_You ok there baby?"_ She whispered in my ear, knowing full well the affect her breath on my ear would have on me. I barely prevented the whimper from escaping my throat before getting completely lost in the feel of Spencer rocking slowly over me.

The back of my head pressed hard into the pillows as I fought to maintain my silence against the sensations Spencer was causing.

I felt her hands leave mine and cup my face in them before her lips met mine, stealing a deep kiss from me. My hands gripped her sides and her body moved over mine sensually, I'm going to go insane.

The moment she let me deepen the kiss further I felt cold air hit my body all over.

She had pulled away completely leaving me with my eyes closed, still panting desperately trying to catch my breath. I couldn't think, I could barely breathe it happened so fast.

"_Spenceerr!"_ I pleaded before slapping my hand over my mouth, appalled at my slip up. All that teasing and I lose it when she's not on top of me.

I felt her hand trace over my stomach and a warm body flush against my side.

"Sorry Ash I couldn't help it, you know what it does to me when I can't hear your voice." She said apologetically.

I smiled, remembering the week I'd had laryngitis and literally could not talk. Spencer went crazy buying me every cough medicine, she even massaged my sore throat gently to try and help my voice box recover.

She's always had an obsession with my voice. I think it sounds like someone's grating something harder than cheese but I soon learnt the effect it could have on Spencer when I would lower it and whisper the simplest things to her.

One time I whispered an entire restaurant menu into her ear, I thought she had her eyes screwed closed because she didn't like the lighting or something. Long story short, she dragged me out of there and literally took me on the hood of the Aston Martin I'd borrowed from my dad's collection for the night.

"Ashley stop remembering the Aston Martin, we need to sleep." She scolded obviously having seen the smirk on my face.

She was clearly as fond of that particular memory as me. That was the first time she had truly topped me, I love my voices capabilites now.

I felt a hand on my right shoulder and Spencer lifted me awkwardly until my back was facing her. I wondered what she was doing until I felt her body flush against mine, spooning me.

I reached back and grabbed her hand, pulling it over me so I could hold it against my middle.

"Sweet dreams Ash." She said before leaning over and kissing my cheek tenderly. My heart grew two sizes at the loving tone of her voice.

I squeezed her hand threading my fingers through hers to tell her the same.

I fell asleep to the calming sensation of Spencer breathing steadily around me.

**SPOV**

I woke up slowly to the feel of Ashley placing delicate kisses all over my face. When she finished with my eyelids I opened my eyes slowly. Smiling down at her.

She looked adorable, her face was slightly pink from the illness and her hair was tousled around her face, her fringe sticking up slightly.

I reached up and ran my fingers through her hair and straight over the top of her head, loving it when her eyes fluttered closed at the sensation.

I missed the sound of her humming when I did this but knew she should rest her voice in order to sound awesome on Friday.

"Sorry about last night Ash I didn't mean to leave you high and dry." I apologised quickly.

She looked shocked and... A little scared?

Shaking her head frantically she stroked my cheek then pressed her lips hard to mine taking everything she could before pulling away and searching my eyes.

I took a deep breath my lips tingling madly from the impression of hers. Once my heart stopped racing I managed to speak.

"Ok ok I get it you did not mind what I did at _all_ and I can do anything I want to you anytime." I laughed.

She nodded her head smiling at me with her nose crinkling up.

I rolled onto my back and pulled her half onto me with one hand in hers and the other on her shoulder.

I wrapped my arms around her body while she put her head on my chest nuzzling in comfortably.

"I missed you Ash." I told her. She put her arms both sides of me and squeezed tightly.

"You missed me a little too eh?" I asked. She poked me in the side hard.

"Ouch, I get it you missed me a lot." Another poke.

"More than a lot?" I asked laughing when she nodded against me.

"Me too babe, me too." I said gently, closing my eyes against the tears threatening.

I felt her move up slightly, I gripped tighter and my breath hitched when I heard her talk.

"Spence baby, please don't cry, we have each other now and I'm not going anywhere." She sounded choked up.

I opened my eyes to find her tear filled brown orbs searching my blue ones. Her hand stroked the side of my face and down the side of my neck, I hummed at the feeling.

"I know this has only just happened but I swear we won't be without each other ever again ok?" She said urgently, waiting for my reply. I felt so safe when she said the words I knew instinctively that she meant every one of them.

"I believe you Ash I really do." I smiled through my tears, she kissed me gently and her head went back to my chest, I began to run my fingers through her hair, just like old times.

**APOV**

I saw it in her eyes; she really does believe every word I've just told her. I knew I meant it and I'm glad I broke my silence in order to make sure she knows how much I care.

My head was resting gently on her chest and her fingers were running through my hair lightly scraping over my scalp as she went.

Electric shocks were going down my spine at the feeling and I wriggled a little trying to alleviate some of the tension building, only to be interrupted by the cause of said tension.

"Ash I have classes to go to today so I need to get up and get ready soon." She said sadly.

I pretended to be asleep and to not hear her sucky news.

"I know you heard me sleepy so get your dwarf ass off of me before I shove it off." She teased.

I looked up at her, shocked that she called me a dwarf.

"I am not that much smaller than you Spence!" I whined.

"Yes Ash, you are at least 4 inches shorter now I can pick you up soooo easily." I grinned at that last part and she shook her head letting out a frustrated breath.

"You have the dirtiest mind I have ever encountered baby." She said but I knew she wasn't mad because she called me baby. Just the name made me shiver a little.

"Yes I know I love it, let's not waste your voice." She said shaking her head.

How did she know what I was going to say?

"You say the same thing every time Ash." She was laughing at the shock on my face.

"You need a new line honey." She told me, as if breaking the news to a small child. I growled and nipped her neck making her wriggle under me and squeal.

"Anyway, I need to get up; my class is in an hour." She said sadly.

I dropped myself onto her chest again and groaned in protest.

"I know I know, you don't want me to go but it's my last year and I love my college so baby, I have to go." She said sounding more annoyed than sad now.

I decided to stop being a child and raised myself up on my arms and stared into her eyes, letting her know I love that she loves her classes. She returned my smile and I rolled off her.

"Where the hell are you off to?" She said while rolling on top of me roughly pinning me again. I stared up at her, surprised at her position.

"What made you think that I meant for you to go away?" She practically whined.

I grinned at her obvious mood swings, one minute she needs to get up and the next she needs to be on top of me. I like it.

"Don't look like that I get that I'm bipolarish right now." I gave her a 'what the hell is bipolarish?' look.

"Oh for god sake just let me enjoy topping you okay?" She started off frustrated but ended completely embarrassed while I just stared at her enjoying how turned on I was just from her words. She shook her head.

"That's it I refuse to be even more embarrassed, you not talking is causing my word vomit so _I_ am going to shower and steal some of your clothes while _you_ stay in bed and relax." She said while trying to get up off of me.

I grabbed her hips and pulled down hard.

"Whoa this is interesting?" She said while grinding down on to me unconsciously.

I grinned at her and kept the pressure on her hips. I could see the exact moment she realised the game I was playing because her eyes widened, her lips parted and she pulled herself up off the bed without so much as a kiss for me.

I whined at her annoyed that she had been able to resist so easily.

"Nice try Ash but I am getting up right now and going to college." She said over her shoulder as she walked into the bathroom stripping her shirt off on the way. Tease!

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the memories of my brilliant night and morning.

After Spence, Kyla and I had eaten a little breakfast we drove Spence to her class. The building looked fierce and I wanted nothing more than to follow Spencer in and take a look around for myself.

As if she knew of my plans, Kyla drove away the moment Spencer closed the door so that I couldn't act on my stalkerish thoughts.

"Ky?" My voice was slightly better but I really needed to not talk so I wrote to her to ask her to drive us back to the hotel.

I have what I think is a brilliant idea brewing, my light bulb just lit up with the intensity of a million candles.

Kyla turned to me with a questioning look the second we got in our suite door.

"Ash, you have that 'smug idea' look on your face, what is it?" She asked and I cocked my head at her.

"You get that look every time you begin to come up with a hit single." She told me, that explains how she knows when to book me a studio ASAP.

One time she had a makeshift studio built in the middle of a field at a festival so I could live record a brilliant idea she knew I would forget. It became one of my biggest singles a few weeks later.

"There's a bigger whiteboard in my room that I bought yesterday, let's go in there." She said and I followed her into her room.

I sat on the bed as she went into her closet and brought out a small whiteboard, then a projector and finally her laptop. She has to be the most prepared person I've ever met.

Once she had everything set up she handed me the laptop, a word document already open and projecting onto the screen.

"Go." She said and I began to type frantically, ignoring my many spelling mistakes.

_Ok so I need to stay in New York and I need to incorporate Spencer's dreams into my life without giving up anything._

_The press is going to turn our relationship into a monkey at the zoo if we continue to let the world know where I am._

"Your impromptu performances are not helping with that one Ash; the world knows you're in love." Kyla said.

_I know I know, so I thought of a way to make everyone think I'm out of New York while I stay and write and record my new album while seeing Spencer publicly._

"How on earth are we going to achieve **THAT** Ashley?" Kyla asked, astounded at the idea. I shook my head.

_Oh yee of little faith. I was thinking that we tell everyone that I'm back in LA recording and then have one of my doubles live my life for a while. Just no girls, I want the world to know my player days are completely done._

"People will see you around New York and studio people might tell." Kyla said.

_I know which is why I would like to set up the label before I record the album I even found the venue._

"WHAT you really want to do this, oh Ash it's going to be awesome, where's this venue I'll get on it right now." She squealed.

_It's a little old theatre in Brooklyn the information is in an email I sent to your old account so you wouldn't see it till I told you. Buy it but don't let the owners know who is buying it._

_The get it kitted out over the next week etc while I write my album. Then we can get me recording._

"Who's going to produce Ash?" She asked.

_Not sure, I can produce but I always need a second opinion on everything I record, can we get Gary to fly out from LA under the radar?_

"I'll see but I bet her will do it for you, you're his favourite musician to work with." She chuckled.

Gary is my producer, gay as a rainbow and we get on really well. I've known him since he first discovered me singing on a random street and then in a small club. He offered to produce my demo for free then became my producer soon after.

He stuck with me through all of my depression and has had to fly all over the world to give a second opinion on songs I needed producing.

_Brilliant, so can you do that. I'll announce my move back to LA on Saturday at the press conference._

_Now about Nat, we want to sign her but something is holding her back but I'll ask Spence what's going on later on see if I can work out what she needs._

"Good idea, don't push it though they're really good friends and you need to make a good impression." She told me.

_Ok I'll be very careful with how I approach the subject ok._

I won't be, Spencer responds best to direct questions and squirreling around a subject just pisses her off immensely.

"So I'll deal with my part and get one of the actresses on board while you talk to Spencer about Nat. We're gonna do this Ash, it's gonna be awesome." She grinned and I returned it tenfold.

"Now take your medication and get on that couch you nugget, relax I know you get all worked up every time Spencer comes round." She scolded.

_Hey we are totally innocent right now thank you very much._

"For how long, anyway rest and relaxation is your new motto, got it?" She asked.

_Got it._

I got up and placed the laptop back down suddenly feeling weaker than usual again. I went and lay down on sub squidge, plugged my iPod into my ears and closed my eyes.

"Ashley, wake up baby." I smiled at the voice of my girl and opened my eyes.

"Hey you, Kyla said you needed to talk to me, she's bouncing around the hotel lobby talking nonstop on her mobile." Spencer looked intrigued.

I sat up rubbing my eyes and leant forward, asking for a kiss.

Spencer giggled before giving in and pressing her lips to mine in a tender kiss. I ran my hands up her sides then down her arms slowly, drawing out he kiss as much as I possibly could.

She pulled away, "Alright you tell me what's got you so excited, I can see it in your eyes." She said looking eager to know.

I tapped my lips to see if I could get away with another kiss. I was in luck because she pressed another kiss to my waiting lips. I stood up shakily and grabbed her hand to lead her towards Kyla's bedroom.

I sat her on the bed and turned on the projector before grabbing the laptop and booting it up. I turned and smiled at her while I opened a new word document. I pecked her on the cheek before typing.

_So today I came up with an idea that will keep me in New York for the foreseeable future and beyond._

I turned to look at her and was relieved to see her face light up as she read my words.

_For a while now Kyla and I have been wanting to start our own record label but I haven't had anywhere I've wanted to settle down for long enough to do so._

_We already own a small office building in LA where Kyla and her publicity team work out of. They have other clients. _I wrote when I saw the look on Spencer's face.

_Kyla runs an entirely separate management business, she wanted to not sponge off of my career and this is how she pulled it off. They represent some pretty big hitters in the industry._

"Go on." Spencer said obviously impressed with Kyla's business acumen.

_Well that cinema we went to is my prospective venue at the moment but we'll see how that works out and as well as producing me I would like to sign Nat once every thing's up and running._

I looked at Spencer and was disappointed to see a frown on her face.

_Is everything ok Spence?_

"Oh sorry Ash it's the Nat part I'm worried about the rest sounds absolutely amazing. I really think you could do it." She grinned at me proudly.

_What is affecting Nat so much that she won't sign with any labels at the moment._

Again I looked at Spencer and was surprised when she reached for the laptop.

_She's in love!_

I stared at the screen in disbelief and then at Spencer then back to her words.

_With Jess!_

I took the laptop back.

_Enough with the exclamation marks Spence. Really that's awesome I bet they make a great couple._

I saw Spence shake her head and look down. I quickly put my arm round her and she rested her head on my shoulder sighing.

"Nat is in love with Jess and I'm almost certain Jess feels just as strongly for Nat but neither will do anything about it Ash." She said frustrated at her friends.

_Sound like anyone we know?_

"That's what I thought but we acted on our attraction when we met then fell apart whereas these two have never even got together to fall out." She explained.

_I see, then we shall have to play cupid._

"I can so hear you saying that in your weird Bond voice you always try to pull off." She laughed.

_I totally pull it off; in fact I had reason to use my awesome skills the other day._

"Oh yeah when?" She asked and I felt the blood drain from my face. It's time to tell Spencer about the SSG.

_Um when I was busying stalking Kyla when she was holding a meeting of the Spashley Support Group dedicated to saving us from ourselves._

"You have _got_ to be kidding me, that's what all the set up's were about." She sounded surprised.

_Yup I found out about it when I listened in on their meeting, they helped me with our date and stuff._

"Aw our friends slash siblings are so sweet." She gushed.

_Trust you to forgive them immediately I was pissed, they had videos and all sorts of shit on both of us._

"Really, like what?" She gulped.

_All sorts but mostly they were obsessed with how much we didn't hate each other and thought New York and this week was their last chance._

"We both know there's never a _last _chance for us." She chuckled to herself.

_So true, I'm glad we didn't go another 6 years though it was torture as is._

"True, we're better than that now or improved at least." She told me.

_So there's one more thing._

"Tell me." She warned.

_Weeell I want to be able to date you out of the public eye for a bit and I could do with a break from the press so I've been thinking._

"I'll call 999." She joked.

_Funny Spence real hilarious. ANYWAY as I was saying Kyla's going to get a double of me to live my life in cali. Girl free of course and we're going to live our lives here._

"Won't people recognise you loads Ash?" She asked.

_Good point but I'm going to change my style, hair, make up, clothes. Everything. I'm thinking about dying my hair tooooooooooooooooooo._

"**NO!**" She shouted causing me to lean on the o key.

I stared at her, shocked at her outburst.

"I mean, I don't want you to dye your hair please don't. I mean, you can obviously it's your hair and you can do what you like to it it's just. Oh damn. Forget I said anything." She rambled.

_Spence don't worry it'll be a last resort, I know how much you like my hair natural I will do my best not to change it._

I pulled her close again and rubbed her upper arm to reassure her, kissing the side of her head for luck.

She buried her nose in my hair breathing in deeply before humming and pulling away.

"Thanks baby."

_No problem_

I moved the laptop off of my lap and Spencer cuddled closer to me.

I let myself fall backwards taking Spence with me.

We lay there with our knees hanging off of the end and her head buried in my neck just enjoying the peace we had finally found.

* * *

><p><strong>Fingers crossed you all like it. There's only a few chapters left now.<strong>

**Please let me know your feelings about this and thank you all for your advice and opinions every review is AMAZING.**

**Sorry about the late update. Thanks again.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

**SPOV**

I spent the whole night in Ash's suite with a huge smile plastered across my face. She's staying in New York, best idea I have ever had the pleasure of hearing.

As shocked as I was to discover my brother and friends have all been involved in the various traps we've been subjected to over the past five years, it's nice to know that everyone's been rooting for _us_ this entire time.

Ash and I spent the whole night lying next to each other on Kyla's bed talking/typing, content to just be.

Ash fell asleep right after Kyla came in with her meds so I carried her across to her room and tucked her into bed before climbing in with her. I did wonder if us sleeping together every night was a wise choice so soon into our new relationship but it felt so right each time, there's no way it can be wrong.

"Speeencerrr?" Jess called to be from the kitchen.

"Yeah Jessie?" I replied once I'd broken out of my Ashley induced stupor.

"Lunch is ready." She shouted back.

I was starving so I made it so the kitchen in record time. Jess laughed out loud at the desperate look on my face and placed a plate full of...

"What the _hell_ is all that Jess?" I said incredulously.

"It's a full English breakfast Spencer and awesome if I do say so myself." She said smugly.

I eyed the sausages, bacon, beans with some sort of bread lump thing and an egg just randomly on top. Half a tomato was also hanging around too.

"You're on the wrong continent." I said accusingly to my food.

"Be nice Carlin," Jess rolled her eyes at me, "It's so tasty you won't believe, I had one when I went to England a few years back."

"Wow they really like to torture their stomachs over there huh?" I said.

"No you idiot it's all pretty healthy if you grill it, which they _do_." She told me.

"Fine fine, I'll try it." I sighed, the scent of the concoction had finally invaded my nostrils and my stomach was doing a jig begging me for the food.

"Good now dig in, bon appétit." She said proudly.

"Full _English_, Jess." I said with a laugh, she just shook her head and sat down to eat her food.

"Mmmmm." I couldn't help the moan that escaped when I took my first bite. Thank you Britain and Jess this is awesome.

"Told ya." Jess boasted.

"I know." I smiled.

"So what got you darn chipper today?" She asked in a faux British accent.

"Oh god Jess you are _American_," I said sarcastically. "Anyway, Ashley told me that she's staying in New York to start a record label and record her album." The smile returned full force.

"Oh my god that's amazing Spence, you guys can finally make a real go of this thing." She said happily.

"Exactly, but there's only one small problem." I said suggestively.

"What? Oh yeah, your job offers, do you have any from around here?" She asked looking concerned.

"Only one and it's not the best one to be honest." I said sadly.

"But you haven't liked any of them so far and you have a few months left yet." She told me gently.

"Yep and the best ones don't come forward until after my senior presentation in May and it's only February now of course." I said hopefully.

"That's the spirit Spence, have you thought about what you want to actually _do_?" She asked for the millionth time.

My career prospects are bright; my only problem is the offers are all varied between production companies in both the music and film industries. Some are even directing offers for small projects such as documentaries.

"Um actually I've been thinking about directing a lot recently but I'm more of an ideas person." My confusion showing through.

"Spencer directing is all about creating something from your imagination and nothing else. What about TV?" She suggested.

"No I've never been attracted to the whole pleasing big wigs and not audiences." I told her firmly.

"Ok so what's your favourite offer so far?" She asked.

"Um probably the directing one from Universal, it's small but sounds like I'd have a lot of creative control." I said.

"You don't sound that enthusiastic Spence maybe we should look at showbiz jobs online or something?" She suggested suspiciously quickly.

"What have you done Jess?" I asked while shovelling the last of my egg into my mouth, I'm sad that the food is nearly gone, it's really good.

"I may have googled jobs in the Entertainment industry." She said wincing.

"What'd you find?" I was curious now.

"Lot's actually, you could definitely stay in New York and be some sort of creative peep." She said.

"Specific stuff?" I pushed.

"Um there were a lot of assistant jobs and producing gigs up for grabs and stuff but your offers seem better." She told me.

"Ok I'll Google it later for sure." I smiled at my best friend.

After that Jess and I spent all day trying to avoid the subject of the concert tomorrow. I wasn't actually sure if I'd been invited, if I have I can't remember it.

Out of my whole to do list there's the one thing that I have been putting off. I need to listen to that Album before she finishes her tour _tomorrow_.

I sat on my couch and buried my head in my hands. I glanced up at my stereo and couldn't help the glare I shot at its stupid CD slot.

'Man up Carlin!' I thought angrily, 'You're better than this.'

Determined I jumped up and ran to my room, I rushed so I wouldn't chicken out and ripped the plastic off the case.

I took a deep breath and began to walk to my stereo system my heart pounding in my chest.

With my eyes closed I slowly cracked open the CD case.

The creak of the cases hinges echoed around my lounge and woke me up slightly. I bravely cracked one eye open and looked down at the inside cover.

"Holy... What?" I said to myself.

Inside there was a picture of Ashley on a beach looking into the distance with the most heartbroken look on her face. I recognised the beach as the one we always went to when we needed to get away but I had to study the photograph closely to understand the hidden meaning.

I took a sharp breath and my heart stuttered when I finally saw the hidden meaning literally in the picture.

I'd assumed Ashley was looking into the distance but if you look, and I mean really look, you can see another person in the picture. It's me; I'm standing there completely oblivious to Ashley's presence staring out at the sun sinking into the ocean.

I remember that evening perfectly; it's the same evening I made the life changing decision to leave LA for good without breathing a word to my ex. If I'd known she was there that night maybe things could have been different.

I braced myself and took another look at Ashley's expression. Usually I can read her like a book but I think just about anyone could tell you how she was feeling when this was taken.

Her eyes are misty, pure unadulterated love pouring out of them but it's mixed with pain too, the kind of pain that time never quite heals.

My own eyes filled with tears knowing how she must've felt just watching me, thinking I wouldn't want to see her when all I needed right then to stop me from sinking into my own black hole was to see her face.

Reverently I pealed the shimmering gold CD out of the case and placed it in my stereo my finger hovering over the play button.

* * *

><p><strong>Next chapter is the Album, concert etc etc lots of drama before 1510/2011!**

**I've had some family stuff going on but the delay was painful for me and will not be happening again.**

**Anyway I have most of the Album sorted BUT I would like suggestions too, the songs need to be deep but I need a couple more upbeat ones too so anything really. Even if I don't use it in Chapter 20 I will probably use it later or in another story.**

**Thank you for every review, read, song choice they all mean so damn much especially on a bad day :)**


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20 (Loved all the suggestions btw they were ace)**

As my trembling hands went to finally press the button my knees buckled a little and I immediately felt the need to lie down somewhere dark.

So I tried to think of how to make this one of the most memorable moments for myself by channelling Ash. I wondered how this scene played out in Ashley's mind. I laughed at myself then finally seeing that I was directing a scene in a movie.

My emotions took hold of me and I could feel Ashley as though she was in the room with me, smiling and laughing at my insane ability to procrastinate forever.

Moving heavily as if wading through treacle I picked up the remote control for my stereo, switched off every single light in my apartment (including my fridge and microwave) then lay down across my sofa my breathing deepening as I struggled to maintain my composure.

Slowly but surely I closed my eyes Ashley's album cover instantly saturating my vision.

I barely felt the movement as my arm extended in the direction of the only light in the room. I knew track 01 was waiting to play.

The remote did its job as I struggled to remember the title of the first song on Gold.

I felt every iota of tension leave my body and every cell seemed to tingle as a beautifully positive melody wove its way into my heart.

Finally I was able to let myself be swept away by Ashley's talent as the music built my excitement growing with every note.

I pictured Ash picking out the guitar a look of utter concentration on her beautiful face.

Suddenly Ashley's husky voice filled the whole apartment and I felt tears prick at the corners of my eyes; I gripped the sofa cushion for support as I listened entranced by her words.

_Papa you taught me to do the right things  
>So now you have to watch your baby fly<br>You've given me everything that I will need  
>To make it through this crazy thing called life<br>And I know you watch me grow up and always want what's best for me  
>And I think I found the answer to your prayers<em>

And she is good, so good  
>She treats your little girl like you know she should<br>She is good, so good, she makes promises she keeps  
>No she's never gonna leave<br>So don't you worry about me  
>Don't you worry about me<p>

Papa there's no way you'll ever lose me  
>And passing on is not goodbye<br>As you watch me walk down to my future, I hope tears of joy are in your eyes

Cuz she is good, so good  
>She treats your little girl like an angel should<br>She is good, so good, she makes promises she keeps  
>No she's never gonna leave<br>So don't you worry about me  
>Don't you worry about me<p>

And when I watch my little baby grow I'll only want what's best for her  
>And I hope she'll find the answer to my prayers<br>And that she'll say

He is good, so good  
>He treats your little girl like a real man should<br>He is good, so good, he makes promises he keeps  
>No he's never gonna leave<br>So don't you worry about me  
>Don't you worry about me<p>

Mama don't you worry about me

Don't you worry about me

I was given a slight reprieve as the song played out; tears streaming out of the corners of my eyes, her words were the most beautiful thing I'd ever heard. I realise she must have written the song before our fall out and I was overwhelmed by her decision to make something so deeply personal to her public.

She was speaking to Raife the way she never could after he was immortalised by a small headstone in his favourite park as a child.

I noticed that she thought we'd have a daughter and that she would be straight, she'd actually thought about that I really had thought I was on my won in that department but now I see how immature I had been to think Ashley wouldn't have the same image of our happy future.

No time was wasted between tracks and I inhaled sharply as the intro forced goosebumps to cover every inch of my arms.

_2am; where do I begin,  
>Crying off my face again.<br>The silent sound of loneliness  
>Wants to follow me to bed.<em>

I'm a ghost of a girl that I want to be most.  
>I'm the shell of a girl that I used to know well.<p>

Dancing slowly in an empty room,  
>Can the lonely take the place of you?<br>I sing myself a quiet lullaby.  
>Let you go and let the lonely in<br>To take my heart again.

Too afraid to go inside  
>For the pain of one more loveless night.<br>But the loneliness will stay with me  
>And hold me til I fall asleep.<p>

I'm a ghost of a girl that I want to be most.  
>I'm the shell of a girl that I used to know well.<p>

Dancing slowly in an empty room,  
>Can the lonely take the place of you?<br>I sing myself a quiet lullaby.  
>Let you go and let the lonely in<br>To take my heart again.

Broken pieces of  
>A barely breathing story<br>Where there once was love  
>Now there's only me and the lonely.<p>

Dancing slowly in an empty room  
>Can the lonely take the place of you?<br>I sing myself a quiet lullaby  
>Let you go and let the lonely in<br>To take my heart again.

Somehow Ash had managed to put every nuance of my broken state five years ago into a song.

It's so liberating to know she felt the exact same way.

The next song hit me like a ton of bricks almost surprising me with its unpredictable nature.

Piano was played with what felt like frustration inspiring so much so fast it took my breath away.

_Thought I needed you_

_But I'm a fool for letting my guard down_

_So tell me what's the trick_

_When love's a prick_

_To keep from hitting the ground_

_Cuz inside_

_It won't die_

_In fact it hurts like hell_

_I guess it's no surprise_

_I'm high and dry_

_Alone at the wishing well_

_Where you cast your spell_

_Leaving me_

_Lovesick_

_With no sure cure for the pain_

_I'm heart-struck and ready to break _

_When it hurts_

_When it's cold when the stars are all closed_

_I guess they're tellin' me_

_Love sick_

_But there's nothing left to say_

_And this time I'm turning away_

_Make it fast_

_Make it quick_

_You're not easy to kick_

_You make me_

_Love sick_

_..._

As the song continued my chest tightened painfully at how hurt she truly was by my actions that week.

I started to sob uncontrollably when she sang 'Ready to break'. Her pain and anger was so powerful it almost broke me.

When the last staccato notes haltingly ended the song I tried to calm down enough to listen to the next track but I could barely breathe through the ache in my heart piercing through my chest.

I sat up, my chest heaving with the weight of five years of hurt I caused.

Steeling my frayed nerves my shaking hand backed up track 3 to its beginning allowing me to listen to my loves true feelings once more. No matter how much it hurt knew it was necessary for me to grow.

Slow drumming followed by piano in an upbeat rhythm had me hooked.

_Hold me closer one more time  
>Say that you love me in your last goodbye<br>Please forgive me for my sins  
>Yes, I swam dirty waters but you pushed me in<em>

I've seen your face under every sky  
>Over every border and on every line<br>You know my heart more than I do  
>We were the greatest, me and you<p>

But we had time against us and miles between us  
>The heavens cried, I know I left you speechless<br>But now the sky has cleared and it's blue  
>And I see my future in you<p>

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll do everything different<br>I'll be better to you

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll be somebody different<br>I'll be better to you

Let me stay here for just one more night  
>Build your world around me and pull me to the light<br>So I can tell you that I was wrong  
>I was a child then but now I'm willing to learn<p>

But we had time against us and miles between us  
>The heavens cried, I know I left you speechless<br>But now the sky has cleared and it's blue  
>And I see my future in you<p>

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll do everything different<br>I'll be better to you

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll be somebody different<br>I'll be better to you

Time against us, miles between us  
>Heavens cried, I know I left you speechless<br>Time against us, miles between us  
>Heavens cried, I know I left you speechless<br>I know I left you speechless, I'll be waiting

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll do everything different<br>I'll be better to you

I'll be waiting for you when you're ready to love me again  
>I put my hands up, I'll be somebody different<br>I'll be better to you

I loved every second of the message laid out perfectly in every layer of the song leaving me speechless at the tone her voice carried. The hope poured into the song swirling around me I truly know she knows we both had a part to play.

Though the songs were totally contradicting each other I could feel the evolution of Ashley's feelings as she waded through the tattered remains of our relationship and came to terms with her love. I know because I went through an identical process.

Happiness at her words and the epicness of the song quickly morphed into eager anticipation for the next song. I placed my hands over my clammy cheeks opening my eyes and relishing the almost total darkness comforting me.

_I remember the times we spent together  
>All those drives, we had a million questions<br>All about our lives  
>And when we got to New York everything felt right<br>I wish you were here with me,  
>Tonight<em>

I remember the days we spent together,  
>Were not enough, and it used to feel like dreaming<br>Except we always woke up,  
>Never thought not having you here now<br>Would hurt so much

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up  
>I need your loving hands to come and pick me up<br>And every night I miss you  
>I can just look up<br>And know the stars are  
>Holding you, holding you, holding you<br>Tonight

I remember the time you told me  
>About when you were eight<br>And all those things you said that night  
>That just couldn't wait<br>I remember the car you were last seen in  
>And the games we would play<br>All the times we spilled our coffees  
>And stayed out way too late<p>

I remember the time you sat and told me  
>About your Jesus, and how not to look back<br>Even if no one believes us  
>When it hurts so bad, sometimes<br>Not having you here

I sing  
>Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up<br>I need your loving hands to come and pick me up  
>And every night I miss you<br>I can just look up  
>And know the stars are<br>Holding you, holding you, holding you  
>Tonight<p>

I sing  
>Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up<br>I need your loving hands to come and pick me up  
>And every night I miss you<br>I can just look up  
>And know the stars are<br>Holding you, holding you, holding you  
>Tonight<p>

Her voice broke halfway through the song and I knew she had deliberately recorded this song for me to hear how much she needed me. Different city same stars I guess.

My loving smile faded as a haunting piano melody assaulted my senses. My breath hitched painfully when Ashley's tearful voice began to hypnotise me. I felt like I'd lost something the ache in my chest crushing me once more.

Tears slowly trickled down as I listened to her pain reflecting mine.

_I always needed time on my own  
>I never thought I'd need you there when I cry<br>And the days feel like years when I'm alone  
>And the bed where you lie is made up on your side<em>

When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
>Do you see how much I need you right now<p>

When you're gone  
>The pieces of my heart are missing you<br>When you're gone  
>The face I came to know is missing too<br>When you're gone  
>The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok<br>I miss you

I've never felt this way before  
>Everything that I do reminds me of you<br>And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
>And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do<p>

When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
>Do you see how much I need you right now<p>

We were made for each other  
>Out here forever<br>I know we were, yeah  
>All I ever wanted was for you to know<br>Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul  
>I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah<p>

I hung my head unable to hold up the weight any longer. Instinctively I knew she was singing about the moments captured by the album cover. I remember trudging down the beach back towards my car head down trying to push through the one thing I knew I couldn't forget.

I was taken aback by the low beat and the lust filled voice that filled my ears. Honeyed words flowed and a shiver went down my spine.

She makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up  
>Just one touch<br>And I errupt like a volcano and cover her with my love  
>Babygirl you make me say (Oh oh oh)<br>And I just can't think (of anything else I'd rather do)  
>Than to hear you sing (sing my name the way you do)<br>When we do our thing (when we do the things we do)  
>Babygirl you make me say (Oh oh oh)<p>

Sexy love girl the things you do  
>(Oh baby baby) Keep me sprung, keep running back to you<br>Oh I love making love to you  
>Babygirl you know you're my (sexy love...)<p>

_I'm so addicted to her she's the sweetest drug  
>Just enough<br>Still too much say that I'm simp and I'm sprung all of the above  
>I can't help she makes me say (Oh oh oh)<br>And I just can't think (of anything else I'd rather do)  
>Than to hear you sing (sing my name the way you do)<br>When we do our thing (when we do the things we do)  
>Oh, babygirl you make me say (Oh oh oh)<em>

Sexy love girl the things you do  
>(Oh baby baby) Keep me sprung, keep running back to you<br>Oh I love making love to you  
>Say babygirl you know you're my (sexy love...)<p>

Oh baby what we do it makes the sun come up  
>Keep on lovin' 'til it goes back down<br>And I don't know what I'd do if I would lose your touch  
>That's why I'm always keepin' you around... my sexy love<p>

Sexy love girl the things you do (things you do baby)  
>(Oh baby baby) Keep me sprung, keep running back to you (keep me runnin' back to you)<br>Oh I love (I love) making love to you  
>Say babygirl you know you're my (sexy love...)<p>

Sexy love girl the things you do (sexy love)  
>Keep me sprung, keep running back to you (runnin' back to you)<br>Oh I love making love to you  
>Say babygirl you know you're my (sexy love...)<p>

She makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up  
>Just one touch...<p>

Oh my freakin'. Damn. That was. Well. I have no words for how much that turned me on, she could do things to me without just her voice that no one else could do with everything they have. Terrifying!

The mood changed again giving me mental whiplash as I tried to take it all in. The piano softly called out its meaning and I swear I felt Ashley's smooth crooning voice vibrate right through me.

_Mmm.._

make everything so simple in a crazy world,  
>and I'm tryna find the words to say,<br>you make everything alright just by being around  
>girl you make me wanna sing<p>

mmmm

your my light in the dark  
>guiding, guiding me home<br>and your faith in me, is all I need  
>baby, mmmm your love it sets me free<p>

mmmmm...

I need a little help, girl  
>I can't seem to breath easy<br>not when you're around oooh

mmmm...

The uplifting song held a hint of gospel, a secret love of Ashley's that now I guess the world can see. Her husky voice mixed perfectly with the gospel choir simply raising the song to another level completely.

I guessed that this was another song written before our implosion and it made me seriously happy to know she wanted me to hear how she felt when we were together.

The abrasive acoustic into to the next song scratched at my soul painfully. My mood went from chilled out happy to confused and frustrated in a matter of bars.

_Don't know, don't know if I can do this on my own  
>Why do you have to leave me?<br>It seems I'm losing something deep inside of me  
>Hold on, hold onto me<em>

Now I see, now I see

Everybody hurts some days  
>It's OK to be afraid<br>Everybody hurts, everybody screams  
>Everybody feels this way and that's ok<p>

Ladadadada that's OK

It feels like nothing really matters anymore  
>When you're gone I can't breathe<br>And I know you never meant to make me feel this way  
>This can't be happening to me<p>

Now I see, now I see

Everybody hurts some days  
>It's OK to be afraid<br>Everybody hurts, everybody screams  
>Everybody feels this way and that's ok<p>

Ladadadada that's OK  
>Lalalala<p>

So many questions, so much on my mind  
>So many answers I can't find<br>I wish that I could turn back the time  
>I wonder why<p>

Everybody hurts some days  
>Everybody hurts some days<p>

Everybody hurts some days  
>It's OK to be afraid<br>Everybody hurts, everybody screams  
>Everybody feels this way and that's ok<p>

Ladadadada that's OK  
>Lalalalala that's OK<p>

Everybody hurts some days  
>It's OK to be afraid<br>Everybody hurts some days  
>But we all feel OK<br>Everybody feels this way  
>But it'll be OK<br>Can somebody take me away  
>To a better place<br>Everybody feels this way  
>It's OK<p>

It's OK, ladadada it's ok  
>Lalalala, it's OK<p>

Beautiful in its simplicity the song fascinated me. It was the only song I felt disconnected towards, I interpreted that as a sign that the song was written to help others in our situation suffering from a broken heart self inflicted or not.

I was aware the album was approaching its end and to be perfectly honest my body felt battered to the point of total surrender to exhaustion. Even so I will never tire of listening to her perfect voice talking or singing.

The sound of a guitar playing gently but firmly made me shake myself and wipe the tear from my face once again taking a deep breath, trying to hold it together for the end of the album.

_So far away_

This time, this place  
>Misused, mistakes<br>Too long, too late  
>Who was I to make you wait?<p>

Just one chance, just one breath  
>Just in case there?s just one left<br>?Cause you know  
>You know, you know<p>

That I love you, I have loved you all along  
>And I miss you, been far away for far too long<br>I keep dreaming you?ll be with me and you?ll never go  
>Stop breathing if I don?t see you anymore<p>

One my knees, I?ll ask  
>Last chance for one last dance<br>?Cause with you I?d withstand  
>All of it to hold your hand<p>

I?d give it all, I?d give for us  
>Give anything but I won?t give up<br>?Cause you know  
>You know, you know<p>

That I love you, I have loved you all along  
>[ From: . ]<br>And I miss you, been far away for far too long  
>I keep dreaming you?ll be with me and you?ll never go<br>Stop breathing if I don?t see you anymore

So far away, been far away for far too long  
>So far away, been far away for far too long<br>But you know  
>You know, you know<p>

I wanted  
>I wanted you to stay<br>?Cause I needed  
>I need to hear you say<p>

I love you, I have loved you all along  
>And I forgive you for being away for far too long<br>So keep breathing ?cause I?m not leaving you anymore  
>Believe it, hold on to me, never let me go<p>

Keep breathing ?cause I?m not leaving you anymore  
>Believe it, hold on to me, never let me go<br>Hold on to me, never let me go  
>Hold on to me, never let me go<p>

I loved it, I just loved it. It was an amazing expression of her love for me and I felt a weight lift off of my shoulders knowing all we both wanted all along is each other. I got the message though, she needs to hear me tell her how much she really means to me. Hopefully I can find the perfect moment to do just that.

When another song didn't start I let myself fall back onto the sofa fully again. I squealed happily like a little kid then froze when a soft piano intro began to play. I don't know the significance of the extra long gap between songs but I tried to make a note to ask Ashley about it when we're ready.

Tears streamed down my face when I realised what song she was singing and remembered her singing this very song to me while I was supposedly asleep back in LA.

She began by whispering the lyrics in my ear then progressed to a low singing voice before placing her head on my chest and listening to my heartbeat as she sang me this song.

I could feel her all over me as her voice trembled through the second verse and tears once again misted my eyes and I let out a choked sob when my memory took me over so fully that I thought I could feel Ashley lying on my chest once again, singing this song to me and only me.

Slowly I let the song lull me like it did six years ago and just relaxed into the beautiful sentiment letting her voice wash over me. I shivered as my body recalled the feel of her breath against my chest as she sang.

_I could make you happy  
>Make your dreams come true<br>Nothing that I wouldn't do  
>Go to the ends<br>Of the Earth for you  
>To make you feel my love, To make you feel my love<em>

My head was completely empty during the last verse simply absorbing the loving vibes this song sent.

After the CD player clicked off I just lay there contemplating what I'd just heard.

Every emotion, every situation and every milestone we'd ever experienced together felt right to me and though the album had torn straight through me, wrecking my emotions with the force of tornado, I felt Ashley's love for me through every angry, sad and loving word.

All my body wanted to do was pass out and just rest for a while but I just couldn't let go of the feeling that if I'd listened to this sooner I would have raced back to Ashley faster than Usain Bolt on speed.

So that's exactly what I did.

I'm standing outside of Ashley's hotel suite listening to my heart racing in my ears the dam of emotions about ready to burst.

I slid the key into the slot and pushed the door open tentatively looking around for Ash.

Not finding her in the main area I headed for her bedroom hoping against hope that she's there.

My steps have begun to slow as I approach her room and hear the wonderful sound of my love singing softly.

The sound broke me down completely and I let my heart control my actions.

Sprinting towards the door is only the first step; I deliberately wrench it open and feel my feet storm into the room.

I spotted her immediately over by the window and my heart strings began to tug me closer to her.

I watched, slightly dazed by her presence, as she turned to see me standing on the other side of her room panting and puffy eyed.

The most endearing look of confusion and worry crossed her face as she took in my appearance and I felt her eyes roam all over me.

"Ash." I said in a strangled and hoarse voice.

She moved then and tried to make her way towards me.

I did the only thing I've wanted to do since I saw her standing there and I stepped forward grabbed the back of her neck and almost roughly dragged her towards me.

She gasped when I pushed the entire length of my body against her and I saw her eyes darken almost imperceptibly.

Lust isn't what I want right now though and I pressed my forehead to hers still panting slightly, my chest heaving against hers.

I chose to stare deeply into her eyes urgently seeking the feelings I knew would show in them and felt my heart try to burst out of my chest with happiness when I found exactly what I was looking for.

Without any warning I grasped either side of her face and bent my neck to slam my lips onto hers.

When they touched hers roughly I felt something snap inside of me and my lips moved against her uncontrollably, pouring everything I have into it.

Ashley moaned against me and I used the opportunity to caress her tongue with mine tenderly now.

Her short nails dug into my back and I couldn't help the moan that escaped when she pushed me into her even more.

My lungs are on fire and burning a hole through my chest but I don't need oxygen right now, I have my lifeline right her holding onto me for dear life as I attack her lips with mine.

I broke away when stars started to cloud my vision, fainting would ruin this.

We were both breathing deeply against each other and I opened my eyes to find Ashley's still closed.

I stroked her cheek tenderly with my thumb and placed another soft kiss on her lips. When she opened her eyes they were completely glazed over.

I knew now was my time to speak.

"I listened and it's beautiful, amazing, sad, and absolutely perfect. Just like you." I whispered to her.

She didn't say anything but she really didn't need to. Her shocked and amazed face told me everything I needed to know.

Placing my head atop hers I squeezed her against me, never wanting to let go.

* * *

><p><strong>Thank you all so much for all the reviews, suggestions just everything really it means so much to me that you like my story.<strong>

**Unfortunately I am going on holiday for two weeks so it is highly unlikely I will be able to write or post.**

**I've reached the point I wrote to but I only have two more chapters left in my mind. I have another story idea lined up but we'll see about a sequel to this too though.**

**Gold:**

**Mamas song- Carrie Underwood**

**The Lonely -Christina Perri **(, thank you)

**Lovesick -Sara Haze **(Not sure who posted this but it's currently 3:24am my time so I'm really sorry that I missed your name but thank you)

**I'll be waiting- Adele**

**Tonight- FM Static **(I don't know who you are but this song is ace so thanks)

**When You're Gone- Avril Lavigne **

**Sexy Love- Ne-yo**

**Mmm- Laura Izibor **(noodles307 thank you so much)

**Everybody Hurts- Avril Lavigne**

**Far Away- Nickleback**

**Make you feel my love (whichever version you like best, I just imagined Ashley singing it.)**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

**APOV**

Do you ever get the feeling that something major has happened but you have no idea what it is. Then, as if by magic, the love of your life bursts into your room tells you she listened then squeezes the life outta you.

Although it feels so good to be held like this again I'm slightly overwhelmed by the reaction she's had to what I'm assuming is my first album. A veritable love letter to her bar one song. I can feel her shaking against me and I can tell it's time to calm her down a little.

"_Spence?_" I wheezed out, she was really squishing me.

She loosened her hold a tad but only so I could breath. I brought my hands from around her back to hold her hands. Once I had that contact I stepped back slightly already missing her but glad for some oxygen.

I smiled at her glowing face, well; grin like a Cheshire cat is more what it was but anyway. I took the time to check that she was all in one piece before leading her to my bed to sit down.

"You ok there Spence you're shaking?" I asked gently keeping hold of her right hand.

"I'm um I'm not sure." She said and a shot of panic hit me.

"Not sure about us Spencer, I thought you said?" Now she looked panicked.

"No No nothing like that I mean I'm not sure how I feel right this second there's so much to feel, that album is exhausting to listen to." She looks so cute when she's worried.

"Well I'm glad my music put you to sleep, was it that boring?" I joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"Duh, the thing was so tragic." She laughed back.

"Favourite song?" I asked.

"The last one." She replied without hesitation but the answer brought more tears to her already swollen eyes.

I stroked her cheek with my other hand, wiping the tears away softly.

"Why?" I asked. I need to know.

"Because, you sang it to me once before." She said smiling while I froze in shock.

"Er yeah I did." I said quietly, hoping she didn't pick up on my tone.

"What are you not telling me Ash?" She smiled while I breathed out harshly, I knew she would know.

"I definitely did not sing that song to you hundreds of times while you were sleeping and I did not have to beg for the rights to sing it and I definitely did not try to beat up the paparazzi that said it was crap." I rushed out.

"Whoa slow down there; I think what you're saying is that I may have heard it once but you'd sung it a hundred times to me. I'll ignore the rest for now but it means a lot to you huh?" She kept smiling.

"Um yeah." I said dumbly. Why didn't I just say that?

"That does explain why I knew all the words straight away." She mused.

"I'm sure you did, second favourite?" I asked nerves building again.

"Um oh god there's so many, emotionally the one about loneliness, for a laugh the lovesick one but for pure entertainment the _I'll be waiting, for you when you're ready, to love me again._" She sang it to me, she didn't sound half bad either. 'We should duet.'

"Oh hell to the no Ash there's absolutely no way I'm ever going near a stage to perform nuh uh." Oops must've said that last part out loud.

"Someone's been watching Glee." I teased.

She hung her head bashfully.

"It's good ok, they can sing and Santana's hot." She defended her choice while my jaw hit the floor.

"Santana's hot huh?" I said, amused but not showing it yet.

"Oh crap, I didn't, I mean I ah hell, yep I'm screwed..." She rambled but stopped when she saw my smile.

"Spence chill, I think Britney's hot anyway and although I am definitely not Latina I'm only a little jealous." I tried to help her out a little. Heather M has nothing on my Spencer. The only problem is that Spencer's not officially mine. The thought caused my eyes to water.

"Britney's hot?" I think she caught the wrong part of that.

"Um I um." I stuttered embarrassingly while Spencer eyed me angrily.

"I am so sorry it's not my fault it repeats all the time, it's fun to watch on tour. I swear nothing will happen." OH my god please tell me I did not just give that away, no no no no no no...

"Ashley Davies." That woke me up. A hand cupped my cheek and I leant in automatically.

"Huh?" I said stupidly.

"You spaced, honey I'm not mad you had to have looked at other women while you weren't with me." She said slowly as if talking to a child again.

"Yeah totally, I mean I had to it's always on." I rambled hoping she hadn't heard...

"But what did you mean nothing _will_ happen?" She asked, her eyes narrowing at me.

"Crap I wasn't supposed to tell anyone so you have to keep this a secret," I looked at her for confirmation and she nodded her head once. "Next season I'm going to cameo on Glee, they wanted to use some of my songs and I love the show so they were eager to take me on." I said happily.

"Oh my god Ash that's amazing, do you know what songs they want?" She asked breathlessly.

"Um they want to use a lot from my first album but they want to hear my next album too before they decide." I replied.

"Ace, so have you written your next one?" She seemed curious.

"Kinda, I've got to work some stuff out then I'll have the finished product ready to record." I told her.

She reached over and pulled me into a quick hug, warming me all over.

"That really is great Ash, you'll be amazing." She said before kissing me quickly.

"Thanks, I'm a bit nervous to meet them all but hey, they're people too right?" I said nervously. She ran a calming hand through my hair sending tingles all over me.

"Yeah Ash, but they are nowhere near as famous as you so don't be surprised if they get a little star struck at first." She giggled.

"Yeah Yeah, I am not that much of a thing." I said waving it off, but Spencer shook her head.

"You'll see tomorrow night just how much you mean to everyone around here, they luuuuuuuuuve you." She said kind of sadly.

"Is it bad that they love me?" I asked, still tingling from her touch.

"It used to be, for me, you know especially because no one knew about us so they just felt free to big you up to me all the time, even more so if they found out I didn't know any of your songs." She said.

"Aw Spence I'm sorry it was so painful for you, if it helps I was lost without you." I said.

"Thanks but it doesn't hurt anymore when someone talks about you, I'm even prouder than I was before." She said smiling now.

"You were proud of me?" I had to know.

"Always Ash always." She said before lying down on the bed and pulling me with her to snuggle.

"If anyone asks I don't snuggle mmk Spence." I said.

"Sure you don't Ash, sure you don't." She giggled sleepily.

I wrapped myself around her and pulled her into me, my head on her chest as she fell asleep. It wasn't long before I followed.

**SPOV**

Friday!

Dear god I think the butterflies are trying to kill me. Nerves are a bitch.

I'm sitting at the bar in Moon waiting for Jess to finish bossing people around for the night so we can go to Ashley's concert at Madison Square Garden.

I wanted it to be a surprise but I had underestimated how much lying to Ash would hurt both of us.

When I looked into her eyes all I wanted to do, was kiss her and tell her how much I need her and that I would be there tonight. However the surprise is important to me I know she acts differently when I'm around so I want to see how she interacts with her audience when she doesn't know I'm there.

I'm a distraction and she doesn't need that for the biggest concert she ever played. For her anyway, I'm sure she's played bigger arenas but anyone who knows anything about rockstar Ashley Davies knows that she's about to make one of her biggest dreams come true.

So I pretended that Jess was sick and told her that I would have to manage Moon tonight as it's one of our busiest nights. Ironically most of our regular clientele are off to the same place I am. Ashley looked crushed at first but I soothed her with a few words and some kisses telling her I'd see her afterwards for sure, ignoring the pain in her eyes that I wouldn't be there.

It's already 8pm so the concert is probably just starting. I want to arrive halfway through to make sure she won't see me.

I heard my phone ring and rushed to answer it.

"Hello." I said.

"_Hey Spencer I've sorted you with security and you can watch from backstage but on the side the Ash never uses, that girl has weird habits ya know." _Kyla told me. In the background I could hear music.

"Has she gone on yet?" I asked my excitement building already, making me want to squeal.

"_Nope not yet by the way she is the most jumpy I've ever seen her before one of these things, she was better than this when she played the O2 for the first time."_ She sounded worried.

"Will she be ok?" I asked as I heard a roar in the background.

"_I think so, you probably heard that, she's just gone on this is almost the best moment for me because she always looks so surprised at their reaction to her mere presence, it's hilarious."_ She laughed.

"Kyla you're such a kind sibling you know that, anyway we'll be on our way soon where should I head to when we've parked up?" I asked spotting Jess staring out of the window at the street with an amused look on her face. I glanced in the same direction and did a double take.

"What is THAT?" I said loudly.

"_Oh good he made it on time, you must be looking outside Moon to see your beautiful ride for tonight. What d'ya think?" _She laughed when I struggled to answer.

"It's white and... big?" I managed to say, still staring at the limo idling outside.

"That's what she said!" Jess chimed in.

"_Oh my god, that was great tell Jess she's awesome right now, for serious."_ Kyla shouted into my ear.

"THANKS KYLA!" Jess shouted back clearly having heard Kyla.

"You too are such idiots," I said while putting the phone on speaker. "For serious, Kyla really?" I giggled, my martini's finally kicking in, my head spun slightly.

"_You love it Spence, almost as much as Ash does I reckon, anywho you'll be dropped at the correct door and I'll meet you there in about 30mins okay?" _She asked but didn't wait for my reply before hanging up; I heard another cheer before she did though, looks like Ash is all good.

"Looks like we have a limo to catch Spence, lets rock." Jess said, smirking at my expression of shock at the limo.

We walked outside and I never even got to the door before it was opened for me.

"Hello Jess and Spencer, my name is Joseph and I'll be your driver this evening. If you need anything there is an intercom button, it's the big red one so use it anytime to ask for anything." Our driver smiled kindly at our grinning faces.

"Thanks Joseph." We chorused as we hopped into the back.

The moment we were on our way, the streets of New York flying by us a light bulb went off in my head.

"Jess." I squealed, grabbing her arm excitedly.

"Whoa what?" Jess asked quickly.

"Do you remember what we always said we would do if we were ever in a limo?" I smiled cheekily at her. Wait for it...

"Oh my god oh my god you are a complete genius Spence." There it is.

She dived for the nearest intercom button and babbled our request to Joseph.

We laughed maniacally as the sunroof nearest our end slid smoothly open.

Standing up unsteadily we gripped each other's arm and crouched beneath the open sunroof.

"Wait!" I shouted to Jess before pressing the intercom button again.

Once Joseph had confirmed he was able to fulfil my request I signalled to Jess to wait still.

When Jess heard the drum roll she burst into fits of laughter and quickly pulled me up through the sunroof.

The wind caught our hair as we sang and rolled our bodies to the beat before singing at the top of our lungs the song filling the air around us.

"_La La La La La La La La La  
>La La La La La La La<br>La La La La La La La La La  
>La La La La La La La<em>

When you're feeling sad and low  
>We will take you where you gotta go<br>Smiling, dancing, everything is free  
>All you need is positivity<p>

Colours of the world

We drew circles in the air.

_Spice up your life  
>Every boy and every girl<em>

We pointed to a random man then a woman on the street.

_Spice up your life  
>People of the world<em>

We threw our hands up in the air.

_Spice up your life  
>Aaahh!<em>

Slam it to the left

Jess nearly broke a rib when we slammed to the left of the small gap._  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right_

My right arm took a battering on the roof as we shook it like true pro's.

_If you know that you feel fine  
>Chicas to the front<br>Uh Uh and around_

We swirled our hips around before repeating all of our favourite moves once again.

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh Hai Sí Ja Hold Tight<p>

_La La La La La La La La La  
>La La La La La La La<br>La La La La La La La La La  
>La La La La La La La<em>

Yellow man in Timbuktu  
>Colour for both me and you<br>Kung Fu Fighting, Dancing Queen  
>Tribal Spaceman and all that's in between<p>

Colours of the world  
>Spice up your life<br>Every boy and every girl  
>Spice up your life<br>People of the world  
>Spice up your life<br>Aaahh!

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh and around<p>

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh Hai Sí Ja Hold Tight<p>

Flamenco  
>Lambada<br>But Hip-Hop is harder  
>We Moonwalk the Foxtrot<br>Then Polka the Salsa  
>Shake Shake Shake haka<br>Shake Shake Shake haka  
>Arriba!<p>

Colours of the world  
>Spice up your life<br>Every boy and every girl  
>Spice up your life<br>People of the world  
>Spice up your life<br>Aaahh!

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh and around<p>

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh Hai Sí Ja Hold Tight<p>

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh and around<p>

Slam it to the left  
>If you're having a good time<br>Shake it to the right  
>If you know that you feel fine<br>Chicas to the front  
>Uh Uh Hai Sí Ja Hold Tight"<p>

With one final karate kick we fell all over the place getting our breath back while laughing hysterically. Hard task I tell you.

"Wow," Jess panted. "I never knew that song was so long."

"Hard to tell when you're twelve eh." I joked.

"This is on the most played lists of both of our iPod's Spence..." She was cut off by another song starting, when I realised what it was I let out a whoop of joy.

"Woooooooooooooooo, get up Jess you're being Scary Spice." I shouted.

"Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!" Jess screamed tunefully.

"So tell me what you want, what you really really want" I sang back.  
>"I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want" Jess again.<br>"So tell me what you want, what you really really want." I put everything into it this time matching her volume.

"I wanna!"

"Ha"

"I wanna,"

"Ha"

"I wanna,"

"Ha"

"I wanna,"

"Ha"

"I wanna"

"Really really really wanna zigazig."

"Ahhh!"

Jess screamed the I wanna's Moon style and I answered just as loudly with the Ha's Carlin style. Adrenaline flowing through us, we powered through the verse and next chorus easily.

Our perfect duet was happily interrupted by an over excited Kyla joining in from the pavement outside MSG. I hadn't even noticed we had arrived.

Jess killed the rap while Kyla climbed into the limo and joined us in the sunroof.

We finished the song in perfect harmony all pulling our best moves and screaming the last...

"**If you wanna be my lover!"**

Laughing hysterically, breathing heavily and falling all over each other we haphazardly exited the limo nearly faceplanting into the pavement.

"That was awesome guys we should battle Ash one day." Jess breathed and Kyla giggled madly in lieu of a reply.

I just smiled at them both happy to be with two of my favourite people. Finally I felt ready to tell someone.

"I want Ash to be my girlfriend." I clapped my hand over my mouth after my outburst.

The others tripped over their feet as they tried to stop suddenly in high heels and tipsy. They looked more like a slow motion train crash than shocked to be honest. I giggled at their faces.

Kyla looked confused, happy and scared at the same time. It created a weird mono brow effect, unfortunate for her really.

Jess looked surprised and happy, less strange than Kyla but she was still laughing slightly so her face twisted, she looked like the Cheshire cat on speed.

"Sorry it slipped out." I tried to cover my laugh at them but failed miserably.

"Wow Spence are you gonna ask her tonight?" Jess asked me once she had her act together.

Oh I haven't thought this through at all and it's getting harder and harder to think clearly through the vodka I have been sipping since about 4pm. What, I was nervous?

"Can't I'm trunk!" I told her. Kyla burst out laughing again and we stared at her.

"Oh my life I'm going to pee myself guys, how can you say. What was it? Trunk! With a straight face." She laughed madly, snorts and all.

"It's a cross between tipsy and drunk; we're campaigning for a spot in the dictionary." I told her.

"Duh Kyla, unfortunately for us genii some stupid animal has stole the word." Jess ranted.

"Sure guys sure, that sounds reasonable why wouldn't they change a definition of an animal's anatomy to a way of describing intoxication sure." She smirked.

"More people would use it!" Jess grumbled.

"Damn straight." I chimed making them giggle at the irony of my words.

We had reached the door while we had been chatting and Kyla pushed it open. Inside you could hear Ashley singing and the crowd screaming.

"Jesus, that's loud." Jess exclaimed.

"Yup, we're actually about a mile away from the stage in corridors but this place has amazing acoustic, she's never sounded better, though I would put that down to outside influences." Kyla smiled at me. I blushed at her meaning and shook my head.

"Stop turning into a tomato and let's go watch your girl." Jess stated leaving no room for me to argue, not that I minded of course.

We made our way through the maze of corridors, Ashley's voice and music increasing in volume with every turn.

Once we could barely hear ourselves think above it Kyla turned back to us and handed us some clear ear plugs. Motioning for us to put them in.

The music dimmed to a normal volume, it sounded like an iPod playing in my ears now instead of being ear splitting.

"Right, being this close to the amps you guys need to wear these for where you will be standing phones are useless near the equipment so don't bother, in fact turn them on flight mode and save us the squeal if you got a text please." Kyla's request was soon done with and we were ready to proceed.

With every step I took closer to seeing Ashley I felt the butterflies return until they were at full force. The bass rumbled through the floor and into us making the world shimmer around us.

We reached a white door in a black wall and Kyla pointed to the door and grinned at me making a heart shape with her hands and tilting her head.

Trying to contain my grin and eager to see her I grabbed the handle and rushed through.

I closed the door behind me, I had shut Jess out but she would know to give me five minutes to take it in alone before disturbing me. Best friends are cool like that.

The music had paused and I could hear heavy breathing over the crowd obviously the song had been an energetic one.

Light filtered through the various curtains and a couple of lamps were glowing, lighting up technical work spaces. A few of the crew smiled and waved at me, Kyla must have warned them.

One pointed to the floor in front of me and I gasped when I saw the hundred or so cables snaking across the floor in front of me.

Picking my way across them proved a difficult task so I removed my heels halfway and hopped through the rest easily.

Nodding thanks to the techie I made my way towards the biggest beam of light flowing from the stage and hitting the wall my door had been in.

I faintly heard Ashley address the crowd through my heart beat and I tried to swallow my nerves.

I stood next to the gap at the side of the stage, reluctant to peer out just yet and took a moment to just listen.

"_Everyone here tonight who has someone they miss, this one's for you guys!"_ I heard Ashley say before the opening chords of I'll be waiting started.

My eyes closed of their own accord as I listened to Ashley sing out as if it would be her last song. Her voice making my heart swell and my chest tighten.

Tears leaked out of my eyes as I listened to her sing live since that night at Moon a week ago.

Seems like forever ago now, so much has happened.

The last chorus burst into my ears and I instinctively stepped around the partition and into the beam.

I saw Ashley front and centre. I was at an angle way at the back of the stage just behind the bassist and to the right but I had a clear view of most of the stage except the far right front. There were no other gaps this big so I had had a feeling this was also another of Kyla's little touches.

The lights came up fully and blinded me for a second but I never took my eyes fromt he spot Iknew Ashley to be in.

She stood confidently at the mic, her black Gibson casually slung around her one of her hands still supporting it as she tempted the audience with another song.

I stood there mesmerised by her as she moved around the stage never dropping a note or missing a cue. Her band is awesome too, the drummer really going for it all the time with the bassist looking chilled but never letting a rhythm down.

Her short black skirt swayed around her thighs, her legs looking miles long in gorgeous silver and black heels. I couldn't take my eyes off of her legs.

I was jolted suddenly and I tore my eyes away to glare at my attacker.

Jess smirked down at me as if to say. 'I see you drooling.'

I stuck my tongue out at her and went back to my ogling.

Jess and I spent the next hour or so bopping to some of Ashley's latest hits most of which I'd only heard snippets of, they were upbeat and mostly happy. She was inspiring to watch.

The songs began to slow down and the atmosphere began to grow desperate as the crowd sensed the concert coming to its conclusion.

Even Jess looked disappointed when Ashley announced she would do one more song.

She did a beautiful rock version of one of her older hits from the second album according to Jess's hand signals and ran off as the lights dimmed.

The crowd screamed madly for an encore and a ripple went round as slight movement could be seen onstage.

A single spotlight lit the stage front and centre and followed Ashley as she made her way the walkway I had missed before to a round platform near to the centre of the crowd.

The stage was completely black so I snuck out with Jess to get a better view, so not allowed but oh well.

Ash was the only thing in the entire stadium with any light the beam white as paper and bright as the sun illuminating her in a stunning black dress. It puts my short red dress I'm wearing right now to shame.

When she opened her mouth to speak to the crowd the arena became deathly silent, I could hear Jess breathing.

I pulled my ear plugs out and felt Jess do the same, transfixed by the sight in front of me.

"_Everyone I have changed the program tonight."_ She started but was interrupted by the crowd's confused murmuring. When a few thousand people murmur at the same time it's pretty loud.

"_Guys guys," _she said calmly. _"It's not a bad thing, I want to sing you a song I wrote a long time ago but only recently finished properly because it never quite fit in with my life."_

She was interrupted again by the crowd's excited screams but she held her hand out to ask for quiet, she clearly isn't finished.

"_Now, I'm sure it's been obvious to all my fans through the media that I have been extremely happy this past week huh?"_ She asked and received a huge cheer in reply.

"_Good I'm glad you all picked up on that," _she smiled. _"Because I want everyone to know how happy I am to have a certain someone in my life." _Another cheer but she still asked for quiet.

"_Anyway this song is about relationships and how hard love can be sometimes." _She paused as if choked up.

"_She thinks I don't know that she's here tonight but I can feel that she's somewhere in here and I'm happy that she's able to hear me ask this." _She paused again and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. She knows, she always did know.

"_I want more than anything, for the woman I have loved for eight years... To be my girlfriend."_

Beautiful rockstar say _what?_

The cheers and screams of excitement slowly died down and I opened my eyes (when did I close them?) to see her sitting at a black grand piano her fingers resting lightly on the keys.

"_She knows who she is and hopefully sometime soon so will all of you, for now though this is for you."_ I swear I saw her mouth the word Spencer in my direction and I about fainted.

Jess wrapped an arm around my waist holding me up as I tried to get myself together enough to listen.

The gentle piano intro rang around the arena and she captured my heart once again.

Her voice sounded husky and a little thick with tears as she began to sing and the raw emotion stole my breath from my body.

_Oh, oh, oh, oh_

Girl, I'm in love with you  
>But this ain't the honeymoon<br>We've passed the infatuation phase  
>We're right in the thick of love<br>At times we get sick of love  
>It seems like we argue every day<p>

Her voice soft and husky turned clearer as she reached the bridge.

I know I misbehaved  
>And you made your mistakes<br>And we've both still got room left to grow  
>And though love sometimes hurts<br>I still put you first  
>And we'll make this thing work<br>But I think we should take it slow

We're just ordinary people  
>We don't know which way to go<br>Cause we're ordinary people  
>Maybe we should take it slow<p>

I believe in every single word she's written.

Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow  
>Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow<p>

This ain't a movie, no  
>No fairytale conclusion y'all<br>It gets more confusing every day  
>Sometimes it's Heaven sent<br>Then we head back to Hell again  
>We kiss, then we make up on the way<p>

I hang up, you call  
>We rise and we fall<br>And we feel like just walking away  
>As our love advances<br>We take second chances  
>Though it's not a fantasy<br>I still want you to stay

We're just ordinary people  
>We don't know which way to go<br>Cause we're ordinary people  
>Maybe we should take it slow<p>

Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow  
>Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow<br>Take it slow

The piano built until she was practically hammering the keys as she started to cry through the the

Maybe we'll live and learn  
>Maybe we'll crash and burn<br>Maybe you'll stay  
>Maybe you''ll leave<br>Maybe you'll return  
>Maybe another fight<br>Maybe we won't survive

Tears streamed down my face as her strong voice broke halfway through and I wanted to run to her. Luckily Jess was holding me or I would have been on the floor by now._  
><em>

_Maybe we'll grow  
>We'll never know<br>Baby, you and I  
><em>

_We're just ordinary people  
>We don't know which way to go<br>Cause we're ordinary people  
>Maybe we should take it slow, hey<em>

We're just ordinary people  
>We don't know which way to go<br>Cause we're ordinary people  
>Maybe we should take it slow<p>

Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow  
>Take it slow, oh oh, this time we'll take it slow<br>Take it slow, slow

Once the song had truly faded the crowd went absolutely wild, in the bright light I could see the tear tracks on Ashley's cheeks as she gazed at the keys as if they had worked that magic all by themselves.

"_Thank you everyone and good night, I love you all too."_ She barely finished the sentence before more tears were streaming down her face.

The follow spot operator switched the spot off kindly to allow Ash privacy to get off of the stage with the crowd seeing her cry. I wanted to hug whoever was on that spot.

I felt Jesses arm leave my waist and I barely heard her whisper to me that she was leaving.

My feet carried me towards the centre of the main stage and I stood looking down towards where I knew Ash would be sitting. The house lights came on and I realised the piano must be on a hydraulic platform and she was gone.

Right at that moment I made a decision. I turned and ran thanking Prada that I never put my shoes back on.

I sprinted to the side of the stage that Ashley always uses and spotted Kyla who just pointed down a corridor.

Never stopping I frantically glanced at every door trying to find her dressing room.

There, a black door with Ashley Davies written on it.

I dived inside completely ignoring the security guard trying to block me.

"Ashley?" I shouted looking around breathing heavily, she isn't here. Damn!

"Miss you need to leave this room right now please." I turned to see a huge man approaching me menacingly form the doorway.

"Whoa ok ok I'm going I just wanted to see her okay I didn't know Kyla needed me to leave I'll go now ok?" I rambled, this guy is scary, his shaven head and huge biceps making for a very intimidating six foot or more beefcake.

"Good." He said grabbing my arm and dragging me from the room roughly, he obviously thinks I'm a groupie.

"**Get your fucking hands off of her right fucking now!**"I heard a familiar voice shout.

"Jess, jess its ok we have to leave now." I told her, trying to avoid a confrontation. It would be like a Chihuahua taking on a Rottweiler, I don't like Jess's odds.

The man let me go and squared up to Jess to give her a piece of his mind. I was shaking now, he seems really angry.

"What's going on here?" My breath hitched at the husky voice behind Jess. I was hidden behind the big guy so she couldn't see me for now.

"A groupie broke into your room trying to see you but her friend here doesn't want to go." The massive man told Ashley.

"Oh ok well carry on then." She must be looking at the floor or something because she would recognise Jess if she saw her, her voice sounds so small and fragile, she probably thinks I've left without talking to her.

'Move you idiot!' I scolded myself.

"You lying beast, you were about to break my best friends arm you bastard." I heard Jess shouting at him but I only had eyes for the small figure in sweats and a vest top standing down the corridor opposite her room staring blankly at the floor.

Her head snapped up when she registered who was shouting at her bouncer and she did a double take when her gaze passed me next to him.

Her expression changed so fast I got brain whiplash. Her features darkened and her eyes looked dangerous.

"He touched you?" She asked me. I shook my head but her gaze fell to my arm where I could feel a hand print forming.

"Get out of my sight before I kill you." She spat at him but he just looked around confused.

"Russell leave you're fired I showed you Spencer's picture earlier, we will consider pressing charges so don't leave town." Kyla's calm but deadly voice piped up from behind me and all of us turned to stare at her.

The oaf glanced between the two Davies sisters and then ran for the exit as fast as his tree trunks could carry him.

"Jess let's leave these two to it shall we." Kyla said while dragging Jess back where Ash had come from.

I stared at Ash whose gaze was steadfastly fixed on the floor again.

Walking towards her I noticed how beautiful she looked with no makeup on, her natural beauty is amazing.

I stopped only a foot from her and reached across to brush her hair back from her face gently.

She still didn't raise her head so I took stronger measures.

Grabbing her hands I pulled her into her dressing room with her admiring the floor the entire time and me not saying a word. Once she was safely inside the room I pushed myself close to her and reached around to close the door before pushing her gently up against it.

I placed my hands either side of her forehead and pressed a kiss to the back of the head, all I could reach with her looking downwards.

Plan B time me thinks.

"Baby, please look at me?" I pleaded softly, weaving my fingers through her hair at the sides of her head.

Instead of rousing her, my voice cause her to retreat backwards, fortunately she has nowhere to go so she just put an inch of space between us instead. Trying not to feel hurt I persevered.

"Ashley what's wrong honey?" I asked gently but she just shook her head and sniffled quietly.

Done with the soft tactics I ran my hands down her neck, over her shoulders, down her arms and took her hands in mine. Stepping forward so her bent head hit below my shoulder I pulled her arms around me and placed her hands together on the small of my back.

Swiftly I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and pulled her firmly but gently into me.

Pressing another kiss to the top of her head I just held her there letting her know I'm not letting go, ever.

Eventually I decided to tell her how I feel.

"Ash baby that can't be comfy, put your head against my shoulder, you don't have to open your eyes." I put a hand behind her head and loved her head to rest below my chin and slightly on my shoulder. She kept her head turned away and I think her eyes were still squeezed closed as I had finally noticed they were earlier.

"Okay now." I whispered to her head and kept my hand on the side of her head stroking her hair slowly.

Every now and again she had been shaking slightly as if trying not to cry so I don't want to push it. I've had the album session to cry my heart out but Ash hasn't had that sort of emotional release yet and I think tonight just overwhelmed her a little. At least I hope that's what's wrong.

"Ash, that song..." I didn't get past those words because Ashley has started to shake violently and sob into my shoulder turning her head to shelter her eyes directly against me.

My chest tightened as her tears began to soak through my dress and she showed no signs of letting up.

Her arms that had been limp around me before came further up and she pulled herself into me. Her knees were beginning to give way a little so I backed up to the sofa and sat down heavily with Ash landing on top of me her head never leaving my shoulder.

"Shhh baby I love you." I said without thinking, she froze immediately before crying harder than ever.

"I mean it Ash." I whispered to her before moving to lie down on the sofa with her on top of me, she curled as far into me as she could and continued to cry. Softly now though.

A long time later her shaking stopped and her breathing turned even, I think she might be sleeping so I haven't moved.

"Spencer?" Her small voice, rough from crying made me look down to see a pair of red rimmed eyes finally studying my face.

I smiled softly at her vulnerable expression trying to reassure her again.

"Hey you." I greeted her owlish eyes.

"I love you." She said smiling up at me, her eyes glittering.

I'm sure I looked taken aback but I soon recovered enough to return her loving stare.

She rolled onto her side and wiggled to bury herself between me and the back of the sofa then pulled at my right shoulder to flip me over onto my side to face her.

I shuffled closer intertwining our legs and our hands too, the ones that weren't underneath us anyway.

"Ash that song was beautiful." I told her honestly.

"Thank you, it needs work." She said and I tightened my grip on her hand.

"If you do a thing to that song I will kill you, do you want me to go to prison Ash? I might drop the soap." I said sternly.

"I get the message." She smiled shaking her head at my words.

"Good, now about your little message out there?" I led in.

"Hmmm, which one would that be?" She asked innocently.

"Well how about the one about you wanting some randomer to be your girlfriend? When do I meet her?" I asked hiding my smirk.

"Funny Spence, real funny." She said.

"I know." I replied smirking full force now.

"So?" Ash said hopefully, she looks so cute when she's hopeful.

"Soooooooooooooooo." I know I'm messing with her but this needs to be light hearted in my mind.

"You're going to make me ask again aren't you?" She said to me and I responded by pressing my forehead to hers and closing my eyes while nodding.

"Alright babe," She took a deep breath and released it. "Spencer Marie Carlin will you please be my girlfriend again?"

The dam holding my happiness in burst and I leant forward pressing kisses all over Ashley's face before attacking her lips.

When there was not an inch of space between us I pulled my head back slightly but left my lips brushing hers.

"Ashley Davies, will you be my girlfriend again please?" I asked a very stunned Ashley.

I felt a pair of lips softly brush mine and my eyes fluttered closed at the intimacy.

"Always Carlin." Came the reply.

"Phew I well thought you would say no." I giggled.

"Nah I love you too much to say no." Her words came so easily, I kissed her to show my appreciation.

"I love you too, so much." I smiled into our kiss after I replied.

"Anyway..." I said, breaking away again before moving back slightly ignoring Ashley's groan of protest.

**APOV**

Two dreams in one day, the girl I love is mine and I just played the concert of a lifetime. I felt so different tonight, heavier somehow as if the weight of the last six years was finally about to crush me.

I nearly broke halfway through the song I have spent 6 years unable to complete but yesterday the noted flowed through my fingers like dry sand at the beach in LA.

I groaned when she put nearly three whole inches between us on the sofa and I tried to pull her back to me but she resisted, she really has gotten way stronger.

"Ash I want to try something with you." She told me and I nodded my agreement, I'd jump from any cliff if she asked me to.

"Close your eyes." She ordered, I closed them.

"Good, ok this is a game about the future." She sounds nervous but I just smiled at the thoughts running through my head.

"For the purpose of this we are married Ash, your Mrs Carlin and I'm Mrs Davies." My smile grew at that thought.

"So imagine you're asleep and very comfortable." She said smoothly and I nodded yawning.

"Now... You wake up, you're in no particular place just a house... You get out of bed, put on your robe and smell banana pancakes." I can practically smell them; I'm in a house and walking down some stairs now.

"You're searching for the smell; you walk into the kitchen and see me." I grinned; she's naked in my mind.

"You go in and sit down waiting and not talking to me yet we just exchange smiles, we had a good night last night." I could tell she was just as into this as I am.

"Where are you sitting?" She asked.

"A table." I answered without thinking.

"Good, what am I wearing?"

"Nothing." I smiled at her gasp.

"Hmm dirty mind intact then, glad to see you don't lose that. Now skip forward a few hours, we are leaving the house to go somewhere?" She told me and I nodded, deep in thought.

"We are getting in your car and driving off." I nodded smiling.

"What car is it?" She asked.

"A Range Rover." I have no idea why either.

"Where are we going?"

"The beach."

"What city do we live in?"

"LA." Oh my god.

I opened my eyes to see her smiling at me; the grin on her face said it all.

"Did you just trick me?" I asked indignantly.

"Kind of, but I was thinking the other day. Of our future together and I could see us at home. Our home."

"In Los Angeles." I finished for her.

"Yes, it's still home to us I think and I want my life with you to be there." She said.

"What about your job?" I asked, I didn't want her to give up any dreams for me now that would mean a waste of six years.

"Actually this is what started the serious future thinking, many of my job offers have been from LA companies but the best offers won't come in until after my final presentation in a few months." She told me.

I nodded thinking hard.

"Ok, what if you get an awesome offer from New York or Boston?" I asked nervously.

"Well I only want to live in LA so it no longer matters about other places I want to start my life and I'm sure about where, I wouldn't take anything from anywhere else." I know she's telling me the truth; she has so much conviction behind her words I know she's completely serious.

"Me too, I was already having second thoughts about a record company here in New York to be honest." I said.

"Just shows, we know where we belong."

"With each other." I grinned at my cheesy line.

"Aww you softy." She said.

"So it's decided then, we're going back to LA after you finish your MFA?" I asked.

"Yep, I'm so excited to go home." She confirmed.

The excitement welling up in me at the thought of everything I'd imagined coming true one day told me that I'm making the right decision.

I kissed her again, I could do this forever.

"I love you Spencer." I said.

**SPOV**

"I love you too Ashley." I replied.

She kissed me again; she will be doing this forever if I have any say in it.

* * *

><p><strong>This is almost it guys, only one more chapter and then the epilogue to go now. Thank for the overwhelming support.<strong>

**However I have a new story in the works but I want to finish this one first before I post it.**

**Let me know your thoughts please I love hearing them. Next Chapter on or before 2/11/2011.**


	22. Chapter 22

_**Quick shout out to **_**bduefbfsy ****_who is the most awesome person as she has written a little make out scene for me for this, she's also writing a couple of smutty scenes too because I am terrible at them. She is an awesome writer so go read her stories. Her writing is between the lines, thank you all._**

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 22<strong>

_**Four Months Later...**_

**APOV**

"Spence, you finished?" I called as I packed the last few books into the huge box.

After four crazy months we're finally making the move to Los Angeles next week. I am so excited to start the record label properly, we have the premises, some acts and Kyla has been out there for over a month getting everything sorted but I have yet to finish recording my album.

Spencer has had so many offers from LA and they were all better than offers from elsewhere she didn't have any of the problems choosing that I was so terrified of.

She still has another month to really choose because her actual graduation isn't for another three weeks or so. Personally I think she is drawn to the producing one from Universal because she'd be working with this director she's obsessed with but hey that girl is unpredictable sometimes.

In May we decided to move in together (I moved into Spencer's place anyway) and I have never felt so comfortable in my own home at any point in my life. So when Spencer suggested we start looking at places in LA I literally jumped her. I think she appreciated my enthusiasm.

The first time we went west we found the perfect place but we lost it because we were hesitant to take the first place we found. I don't regret that hesitation because the second few days we spent in LA we found the perfect apartment.

It took me hours to persuade Spencer because she won't be able to afford half the rent for a while. I begged and begged and begged some more and she gave in when we went for the second viewing because I had had someone come in and decorate it. I think the island in the kitchen was the deciding factor for her because she sat there the entire time gazing around probably picturing us there.

We signed that same day.

"Yeah Ash, but I kept a set of bed sheets." She replied, while walking back into the lounge smiling.

"Why'd you do that?" I asked.

"You know I like changing them weekly." I laughed at her pout.

"Yeah I know Spence don't worry." I pulled her into me and gave her a kiss to make up for it, she smiled down at me.

"Why are you so damn tall?" I asked pretending to be annoyed.

"Cuz you're my midget!" She exclaimed, I gaped at her.

"Who said that?" I was shocked.

"That crappy magazine Kyla wouldn't let us look at the other day." She told me grinning.

Oh I almost forgot we went public in April nearly a month after the concert but Kyla managed to get the hounds otherwise known as paps to agree to a photo shoot.

We were nervous but got through it, of course the papas still began to show up everywhere we went and lots of articles were printed about us.

Kyla like the awesomest person in our lives she is went all Hurricane Ky on their ass and sued half of them while putting out the rumour we had moved to LA. We kept off the streets or went out in disguises and they bought it.

Jess let Spencer work in a brown wig to avoid being recognised and I continued to try to persuade Nat to join my new record label. Still hasn't worked, Spence and I thought we had it all figured out with her at one point but boy were we ever wrong.

"How do you know what it said?" I narrowed my eyes.

"I went out and bought one so I could read it, it's kinda funny?" She said it like a question.

"How is me being a 'midget' funny?" I exclaimed.

"One because you're not that small, two because they say the only reason you're with me is because I'm taller and therefore you're under my spell or something." I raised my eyebrows.

"And three, they say you're my shortie it's cute." She grinned cheekily.

"There is nothing cute about me Carlin, I'm a badass rockstar." I returned.

"Riiiight so you don't snuggle, you're _never_ the little spoon, you hate it when I kiss your noise, serenading me is just a no go and your favourite movie is Texas chainsaw massacre?" She raised her eyebrows teasingly.

"Okay okay, I love snuggling, that spoon thing is equal in our relationship," Her eyebrows disappeared at that. "My noise is a weak spot that you like to exploit, I only sing to you to check they're good," She's gaping at me like a fish now. "aaand for all you know I love people being sliced and diced." I finished with a flourish and breathing deeply.

She snorted at me comically and I sighed in defeat.

"Okay so being a complete marshmallow is like my life but c'mon Spence," I whined. "I'm badass the rest of the time right?"

"Sure you are Shortie." She told me seriously.

I widened my eyes.

"Please don't call me that." I begged.

"Shortie Shortie Shortie." She sang as she sprinted off towards our room.

"You will regret that." I shouted before chasing after her laughing and trying to think of tall jokes real quick.

**SPOV**

"So there are thirteen blondes and one brunette hanging on to a rope." She started again.

When Ash couldn't think of any tall jokes or nicknames she started in on the blonde jokes. I think she googled it because she has not stopped for nearly five hours.

I'm trying to watch the new Adam Sandler movie we rented but Ash keeps interrupting him.

I whacked her on top of her head, I still let her tuck herself under my chin even after all the jokes, and I did call her shortie multiple times while we were out. In fact I used it instead of her name all the time.

"So _anyway_, they're all hanging on a rope one hundred feet above the ground with no way of getting down or climbing up." She said gleefully.

"Really Ash?" I asked incredulously.

"Really, they have no way of getting up or down and the rope is going to break soon." Oh dear god, I'm going to kill my girlfriend.

"Yep so because they all accept that they're going to die the Brunette starts to make a speech." She continued despite me hissing at her.

"She tells them all that they are the best people she's ever met, the most kind hearted and warm people and she's so happy that she gets to die with them all etc." She grins and I know the punchline is approaching.

"At the end of the speech the blondes are all crying and they all clap madly to show their appreciation." I groaned realising what had happened.

"SO all the blondes fell and the brunette was left to climb up without the rope breaking." She finished triumphantly.

"You are the worst Ash; can I watch the movie now?" I asked pretending to be pissed off.

She couldn't see the smile on my face so she actually fell for it. I felt her tense up and her heart sped up under one of my hands.

"Spence, I'm sorry I thought you didn't mind so much. I'm sorry baby.." She truned in my arms and saw my grin.

"Oh my god Spence," She said clutching her chest. "Don't do that to me babe you'll give me a heart attack."

I shrugged, "It's nice to know that my girlfriend is so afraid of hurting me." I smiled at her and kissed her quickly.

"I'm sorry Ash, a few of the jokes were funny, and I liked the one about ringing you to get your number!" I giggled.

"Oh thank god you called my Ash." She breathed a sigh of relief.

"Yeah I hate the word Shortie plus you ain't that short small fry." I chuckled at her face.

"Not funny." She growled.

"Lil bit." I said showing her with my finger and thumb really far apart.

"I give up with you, there's no saving you." She sighed with a smile and turned back around to watch the movie before shaking her head.

"Spence what's happening?" I chuckled.

"How am I supposed to know, you distracted me and not in a good way?" I said indignantly.

"Oh yeah, anyway about Nat?" She started and I groaned.

"Ash she's not going for it, we were obviously wrong." I said.

A few weeks ago we had set Jess and Nat up on a date that went seriously wrong in just about every way.

Jess had spilt her drink all over Nat and red wine is hard to get out of a _white dress_, then Nat had choked on some of her pasta after changing into some of the restaurant manager's spare clothes.

It got slightly better but when they got back Jess somehow managed to trip over getting out of the car and broke her arm.

Nat had to take her to hospital and that was the end of that.

Ash and I watched the whole thing go down with dread in our hearts. Since then Jess and Nat practically don't talk unless they have to but Nat is still refusing to leave Moon and her regular job to take any of the offers she's been bombarded with.

The offers have been retracted steadily and now Ash is the only one left still pursuing the potential star.

"No way even I can feel the USL between those two now, it's only gotten worse and they both think it's unrequited." She said.

"USL?" I asked.

"Unresolved Secret Love Spence." She said slowly.

"Ah of course how obvious." I said stroking my fingers through her hair to relax her.

"We should set them up again." She said as though inspiration has stuck.

"Yeah because it went sooo well last time." I said sarcastically.

"Not on a date, I mean like our lot used to." She said, maybe she's onto something here.

"Hmmm, tell me more." I said and she wriggled excitedly.

"Well, we could make it so they have to endure a car journey together or something, or we could do the old fashioned lock them in a room with a bed trick." She said.

"I thought it was just locking them in a room." I said.

"If it was you and me I would want a bed so I added it for them." She said kindly.

"Aw how sweet." I said sarcastically.

"Moving swiftly on, what do you think?" She asked me with her eyes closed as she flipped over to lay her head on my lap.

"Almost all of the rooms in Moon have locks on so that parts easy but to facilitate your bed theory we would need to lock them in Jess's room here." I said thoughtfully.

"It can be a sofa or something, or a table, hell screw it they can use a wall." She said, making me laugh.

"Ok then how about the Green Room, which has a sofa and GR 2 is Nat's personal one now." I suggested.

"Brilliant, how do we get them both in there?" She asked me.

"What day is it today?" I asked her.

"Urm Wednesday I think." She said scrunching her eyes up in thought.

I pressed a kiss to her frowning forehead and it unwrinkled instantly.

"Ok Nat's playing tomorrow and Friday then but she's in almost every night anyway and she's often in her GR writing more songs." I said.

"Ok so we'll do it tomorrow because I'm free and you can manage the bar on your own while they sort themselves out, it would be too busy on a Friday.

"No problem, so you hide in the room with the key and wait for Nat to arrive and sit down, we'll have hours before she goes on at that point so no problems there." Ash nodded.

"Then you text me and I tell Jess that Nat is sick and wants her to go check on her, she'll come running and I'll follow." I said but Ash stopped me.

"Actually you should tell her that she's hurt then she'll run and Nat will see how worried she gets over her, remember when Nat hit her head on the door?" She said and I nodded in agreement.

"Good idea, she freaked out at that. So when Jess enters the room you jump out and block the door with me, we'll tell them how we hate seeing two people we loe go what we went through and we leave them to it." I said then it hit me.

"What is it Spence?" Ash asked, sensing my tension.

"Jess can pick locks and she carries the keys to every room on her, she won't give them up without a fight anyway." I told Ash disappointed but she just smiled.

"Easy Spence, we'll both chew lots of gum then shove it in the lock after we lock the room." She grinned evilly while I just stared.

"You're crazy Ash." I said.

"I know you love it." She carried on grinning.

"Despite it more like." I said, knowing I had her.

"Hey." Yep no comeback.

"Anyway what we doing tonight?" I asked and Ash sat up, nearly head butting me in the process.

"Shit on a stick, what time is it?" She said looking around frantically.

"It's nearly five pm why?" I said.

"Shit shit shit, Spence we have to get ready, wear something smart but not overly so." She tried to get up but I pulled her back.

"What on earth for?" I asked.

"Oh sorry we're going to see Wicked tonight." She grinned at me.

"Oh my god," I squealed pulling her into me and planting kisses all over her face. "I love that show."

"You've never been Spence." She laughed.

"I watched it on YouTube." I said quietly.

"Doesn't count anyway go get ready it starts at seven." She told me and I jumped up.

"What the hell we have no time, move your ass Davies." I shouted.

"Ok ok I'm going we can shower together it'll save time." She smiled suggestively.

"There's no way that would make it any shorter and you know it, you can take the guest shower, see ya." I said as I ran for the shower, there's no time to waste.

Twenty minutes later and I was shuffling out of our bedroom to find Ashley. I had chosen my short blue dress that sets off my eyes and I know Ash loves me in it, something about how clingy it is I guess.

Chuckling to myself at the memory of the first time she saw me in it I searched around the apartment for my girl but came up empty.

"Ash?" I called out. Where's she gone?

I was pulled out of my worried thoughts by a knock on the front door.

I jogged over to it as best I could in heels and flung it open, my eyes instantly turning to saucers as I stared at Ashley.

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><p>I watched as Ashley sashayed in front of me.<p>

God I love being able to guiltlessly feast my eyes upon her body.

She held open the door and stepped back for me to walk out, always the gentleman.

**APOV**

Spencer smiled at me her eyes still fixed on my body and shook her head as if to clear it.

Taking small tentative steps forward she gasped when I wrapped my hand around her upper arm to stop her walking past me.

I couldn't help myself, I've been thinking of Spencer's lips all day.

I used the hand around her arm and spun her around. Our eyes connected, blue and brown burning into each other the desire clear.

Spencer licked her lips and my heart raced as she eyes my lips hungrily. I was wearing red lipstick tonight.

Our fronts were almost touching and my head tipped forward slightly of its own accord and I watched as Spencer's eyes fluttered shut.

Her breath danced across my face tantalizingly and my grip on her arm tightening desperately.

My lips grazed hers lightly and my fingernails were digging into Spencer's arm and I felt her hand travel up my side to my neck.

Her hands intertwining behind my neck.

I moved my lips against hers softly but she impatiently pressed into me, my hand moving to her lower back and pushing her into me.

We kissed passionately my hand still on her arm. I moaned helplessly when her tongue traced my bottom lip, she found me extremely receptive to her probing tongue.

Our tongues intertwined passionately and Spencer arched against me when I stroked the roof of her mouth. She eagerly leant forwards trying to get closer.

I took a step backwards as we became unbalanced but it seemed that was what she wanted as I pulled her with me, she gently pushed me backwards and we moved in unison into the apartment never slowing our kiss.

I felt the back of my knees hit the couch and I pulled Spencer onto it with me.

I still remember how much I missed the comfortable weight of Spencer resting on me, the way she smelled, her breath tickling my face as we continue to kiss passionately.

Spencer ground her hips into me gently as we melted into each other.

I moaned and pulled her into me as we kissed desperately now, a moan escaping her lips as well.

Our hand were running all over each other but neither of us had any restraint anymore.

Our bodies moved in syn with each other and I could feel my control slipping as temptation grew exponentially.

I realised I want nothing more than to take Spencer right here right noe. Feel her body, make her want more. But something nagged at the back of my brain.

"Wait." I whispered my voice low and husky, but Spencer kept kissing me heatedly showing no intention of stopping, her hands were sliding up my thighs. It took all my will power to speak.

"Wait, wait. Spence." I gently placed my hand on Spencer's chest, and I could feel her heart jumping up repeatedly to meet my hand.

Spencer pulled away finally her face away from my neck, confused ad dazed.

"We-we gotta go baby." I told her regretfully.

She let out a frustrated breath, she clearly hated that we have plans.

Our forehead came to rest and we giggled like foolish girls.

"Come on beautiful, we have a show to get to." I said.

**SPOV**

Ashley's eyes were still on fire with passion as she looked hungrily at me as though she couldn't help it. I was surprised we made it this long to be honest but we agreed to take things really really slow and so far Ash has stuck to that.

She keeps thinking with her brain not her pants and it's killing me.

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><p>When we make out, and we make out a lot I always want to go further but Ash has managed to stop, sometimes barely, every time.<p>

I respect her decision but the frustration is slowly but surely taking over my every thought.

I climbed off of her reluctantly and we headed out to the show, sneaking heated glances at each other all night long.

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><p><strong>I split up the last chapter into three to make you guys happier, this way it won't end as quick.<strong>

**Jess and Nat are in the next one. I was a little confused because I got a lot less reviews for Ch.21 I hope it's not the writing or anything so I assumed you were all really busy.**

**Thank you to every reader and especially reviewers. You're all the bestest.**


	23. Chapter 23

**Hiya everyone, I'm back from a case of severe writers block, mocks and a new job. This is just an ease you back into it chapter. I've written extra because I made you all wait too long. I have also started on a new story so when I post that please check it out.**

**If there's anybody out there, thank you for waiting and I hope the next few chapters make up for it.**

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><p><strong>Chapter 23<strong>

**SPOV**

So let's just look back at the last few months of my life because let's face it they have been ridiculously lucky. Sometimes I wonder if someone's simply writing a fairytale and showing my ass into it.

In short I met the love of my life (again), we dated (kind of), she sang me a beautiful song (or twelve), we decided to spend our lives together (at freaking last) and are now about to move to LA to begin our epic story (Yay).

But first we must help other to find what we have, namely my beautiful friends Jess and Nat who cannot seem to get it right.

They have officially embarrassed themselves in front of each other. Jess is even wearing a cast to prove it. So Ash and I have a plan to save them from themselves in the same style our friends adopted to help us. Except ours is going to work faster.

Right now I'm serving behind the bar at Moon with what I'm sure is a dopey smile plastered on my face while my gorgeous girlfriend is stuffed in a laundry basket in Nat's Green Room.

We searched her GR earlier but could not find any hiding places, I thought we would have to abandon our plan but Ash went running and came back with the laundry basket from my room. She'd emptied the damn thing out and proceeded to plonk it behind the clothes rack and jumping inside.

I nearly peed myself laughing at her trying to reach up and close the lid before knocking it down onto her fingers.

She was like a little jack in the box until the novelty wore off and she settles down for a long wait.

My teacher told me to ask another teacher for a long weight once. I was left standing at the classroom door until after break when the teacher I'd asked came back and told me I could stop waiting it had been long enough. Bastard.

Anywaaay, I'm behind the bar waiting for Jess to get here so I can put our plan into action but she's taking absolutely ages.

Oooh I see her, I see her, and she's coming right for me. Act cool act cool act cool.

"Hey Spence, what's up?" She said as she rested her day glow pink arm on the bar.

"What who me? Nothing why would you think that? That's weird you're weird!" Smohooth Spencer she's never gonna guess something's up.

Instead Jess just stared at the bar sadly her forehead all creased up.

"Yeah okay Spence, I'm going to my office you run the bar tonight." She told me before wandering off slowly.

It took me a couple of seconds to get my act together after she left to peg it through the door.

"Jess Jess Jess." I called and thankfully she hadn't gone too far.

"Yeah Spence?" She asked as I rounded the corner. I almost felt bad at what I was about to do but I pushed through. My friend needs this. I hope.

"I just got a call from backstage, they think Nat is hurt they heard a crash and she's crying." I said trying to sound frantic.

Jesses eyes widened and her whole body tensed as she registered what I'd said.

"What why has no one gone to help her?" She threw the words at me.

"..." I opened my mouth to reply but she cut me off.

"Oh forget it I'm going, run the bar Spence." She shouted over her shoulder as she sprinted towards the backstage door in the corridor.

I smiled evilly as I took out my pack of chewing gum and shoved every piece in my mouth before trying to chew. Not as easy as you may think.

Waiting sucks so I casually walked out of the door I came through and across the club to enter backstage from the opposite direction to Jess.

I crept down the side of the curtains giving a thumb up to Josh on my way past. We had let him in on our plan when he caught us making out with Ash in a laundry basket. One of the most awkward conversations ever.

From my position I heard Jess running down the corridor and then the door to Nat's room being flung open, hitting the wall on the far side.

"AAAAH." Nat I'm assuming screamed at the sudden noise.

"Nat are you okay Spence said you were hurt?" Jess puffed out. I started to inch towards the door anticipating the reply.

"Huh why would she say that I'm perfectly fine?" Right on cue.

I stepped into the doorway right as Ash flipped open the lid of the basket and scrambled out. Good thing she'd practised because it was a tight squeeze and she'd gotten trapped twice.

Jess and Nat both screamed in unison as Ash dived towards me in the doorway grinning like a mad woman.

I smiled smugly at the shocked look on both our captives faces as we built up to our speech.

"What the fuck guys?" Nat asked and Jess nodded in agreement, that's when I noticed Nat had grabbed Jesses hand in her panic and had yet to let it go.

Jess was still stood next to the vanity with Nat perched precariously on the stool as we put our plans into motion.

"Well as you both know Spence and I were unhappy apart for far too long and we really don't want you to go through what we did." Ash sounded upset and I put my arm around her gently she nudged me to continue.

"Ash is right, we were both unhappy and we can see how you feel about one another so we are locking you in this room until you sort it out, okay good we'll just be going then." Speaking around a mouthful of chewing gum is hard but I managed with very little spit fly.

We backed out of the door quickly and Ash slammed the door before our message could sink in.

"Quick Spence lock the door." Ash whispered.

I pulled out my key and shoved it in the lock just as the handle began to turn and Jess started hollering form inside.

"Oh Shit!" I said helpfully. Ash rolled her eyes at me and threw her whole weight upwards to stop the handle from turning.

In doing so she had to crouch down and ended up directly opposite my zipper. I smirked at her.

"For god's sake Spence get your mind out of the gutter and lock the door, I'm dying here!" She shouted over Jess.

"Oh, sorry babe." I shouted back as I turned the key hearing a satisfying clunk as the lock slid into place.

The handle stopped rattling and Ash stood up with a sigh. We heard the telltale jingle at the same time and snatched the chewing gum out of our mouths. I produced a cocktail stick from my back pocket and Ash poked the mess inside the lock just as Jess tried to slide her key into it.

Cocktail stick and key should have an obvious outcome but the little wooden spike worked wonders in my girlfriend's talented hands and Jess cursed heavily. Thank god she only has one hand or Ash would not have won that.

"You motherfucking dickish turds let me out I have a bar to run and Nat has a set to do!" Jess screamed, I hadn't heard a peep out of Nat yet so assumed she was still in shock.

"Jessie you need this just talk to each other, we'll wait for as long as it takes for you two to come to some sort of conclusion about your feelings. There are snacks and drinks behind the sofa." I said calmly to my irate best friend I could see her murderous expression through the door.

Silence reigned and I looked at Ash for direction but she just shrugged.

"Let's wait over there." I said, nodding towards the stage door but Ash shook her head and grinned.

My hand was stolen from my side as Ash dragged me into the dressing room next to Nat's. I immediately noticed the sofa that used to be on the far wall had been turned around to face the wall. Ash turned to me with a smirk.

"Our own little listening booth!" She said proudly and I chuckled.

"Niiice did you bring glasses?" I asked and Ash went to the vanity and picked up two huge glasses, this is going to be so much fun.

"Who are you and what did you do with my girlfriend?" I asked jokingly.

Ash walked towards me and almost predatory look in her eye.

"Hi, I'm Bond, Ashley Bond wanna do some spying with me?"

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><p><strong>Let me know what you think?<strong>


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

**APOV**

Anything that I can do to make Spencer smile at me like I'm the only person in her world I will do one hundred times over. The Ashley Bond comment went from being a quirky joke to a full on (PG) role playing game.

We have had our glasses pressed to the wall for ages and have not heard a peep, well a cough but nothing else. I thought they would have been all over each other within minutes, shame.

"Ash." Spence whispered at me.

"Oh so were back to my normal name now are we?" I whisper chuckled. Spence had called me Bond for the last few minutes.

"Damn I forgot, anyway how long do you think it's going to be, Nat is supposed to be going on in a couple of hours?" She asked with a cute frown on her face.

I reached out to caress the worry lines and her eyes fluttered closed at the touch, I love the affect I have on her.

"It will be fine Spence; I'll go on if they haven't worked it out." I said without thinking.

"Wait what? You would do that?" Spencer asked me dropping her glass into her lap. I mirrored her and turned on the couch to look her in the eye.

"Of course I would, I don't want them to have to suffer like we did." I told her honestly.

She reached over and pulled me into a tight hug.

"Sho shweet." She mumbled into my shoulder.

"I know I know I'm awesome, it's genetics." I boasted.

She pulled back and grinned.

"So Kyla's awesome too?" She said innocently.

"It's not that genetic..." I started but was cut off by Spencer's hand slapping over my mouth.

I groaned indignantly through the digits but she just rolled her eyes and used her head to indicate the wall to my left.

My eyes widened in question and Spencer nodded frantically.

We both grabbed for our glasses probably swapping and carefully placed them against our wall.

"When do you think they'll give up?" We heard a muffled Nat ask.

There was silence for almost a minute before the reply came.

"Spencer is as stubborn as they come so never." Jess sounded way to cold and Spencer was looking pretty irritated at the comment.

Spencer caught my eye and raised her eyebrows silently asking if I agreed. I nodded apologetically while mouthing 'six years' to her. She acknowledged the truth with a head tilt.

"You okay Jess?" Nat tried to be nice but we heard Jesses scoff through the wall.

"Oh yeah I'm just dandy, I'm a prisoner in the green room of my own club with a broken arm and one of my employees." I flinched on Jess's behalf.

"Is that all I am to you?" That's why I flinched. I looked at Spence and she grimaced too.

"NO I didn't mean, oh for god's sake I'm terrible at this." I have to agree with you Jess.

"Ain't that the truth?" Nat said exasperatedly. "During our date you barely talked."

"Sorry." Jess said it so quietly I only just caught it.

"Don't apologise it's cute until you come out with something bitchy." Don't hold back Nat.

"Let me try again?" Jess asked sounded slightly more confident.

"Which part?" Wow Nat's not gonna make this easy huh?

"Um, the am I okay part." Jess said.

"Are you okay Jess?" Nat asked sounding amused.

"I'm fine thank you how are you?" Jess replied brightly sending Nat into a fit of giggles. Clever, I'm so taking notes.

"Ah I needed that." Nat sighed as she stopped giggling.

"I know." Jess said happily.

I could practically hear their smiles now.

"Actually there was one part of the date I really liked, we were talking about everything, you remember?" Nat asked.

"Um I don't..?" Jess sounded upset that she didn't know what Nat was on about.

"It's alright I think I know why, we were in the car on our way home and we were laughing about our terrible meal. Don't look at me like that Jess, it was a disaster!" Go Nat. "Anyway you finally started talking to me, it was amazing, turns out we have a lot in common." Nat said dreamily.

"This sucks why don't I remember that?" Jess asked.

"Because as you stepped out of the car you were laughing at a joke and didn't see the curb was higher, tripped and whabang, broken Jess. The painkillers screwed up your memory I guess." Nat said.

"Well I'm glad you were having a good time at last. Damn I can't believe I'm missing that." Jess said sadly.

Silence enveloped the room. This would be the perfect time to ask Nat out again Jess, just so you know.

"Do you think they're gone?" Nat said, aw moment so completely broken.

"Well I hope so, I was meant to be on the bar tonight so they'll only be one person there if my dear friend SPENCER has forgotten that little titbit." Jess said a little too loudly.

I watched as Spencer's eyes widened comically before she leapt over the back of the sofa and sprinted out of the door.

I could hear Jess cackling as the door to our room slammed shut after my girlfriend.

"How did you know?" Nat asked, still giggling slightly.

"Spence has a tendency to get over excited during the execution of plans especially if they have been planned in advance." Jess explained.

"But that still leaves?" Nat trailed off.

"Hi Ashley." Jess said. Oops busted, maybe if I just keep quiet?

"Ashley don't be a wimp, go find my nugget of a bestie." I could tell Jess knew something so I decided to give it up.

"Why?" I asked and I heard Nat gasp.

"Spence knows we have security cameras fitted with optional sound monitoring in every room. You can just stalk us from the security room." Jess said sounding tired.

I tried to be completely silent as I got up and crept out of the door after Spencer.

**JPOV**

Phew she's gone now I can deal with this mess.

I attempted to stand up but failed miserably, without the use of my arm and nothing to pull on my balance is screwed.

Nat was just scrutinising my face and I felt as though my whole body would begin to tingle from her gaze.

"Jess let me help you." She told me in a way I could never resist.

She took my good arm and yanked me to my feet; damn that girl is stronger than she looks.

I reached for my snack in my back pocket and pulled it free, smiling at my favourite treat.

"Dairy milk?" Nat asked as I walked over to the busted door.

"Yup my favourite." I said as I tried to open the wrapper with one hand.

"Jess?" I heard Nat say quietly and turned around to find her only a few inches away from my face.

My throat instantly turned into the Sahara desert and my vocal chords froze.

I stared at her completely unable to say a word while she just looked confused.

"Jess, you okay?" She asked and I finally moved my neck muscles, spotting her outstretched hand.

I wordlessly surrendered the chocolate bar to her and watched as she tore it open before breaking off a piece and holding it up to my lips.

The sweet scent under my nose and the sensation of the smooth chocolate on my lips woke me up from my daze.

"I um I," big girl words Jess use them. "Actually I need that for the lock." I told Nat cringing at how much my voice and hand shook as I took the chocolate from her.

"Oh right, wait what?" She sounded more confused than before.

I popped the chocolate in my mouth knowing I don't have much time before Ash finds out I duped her.

"Shits phaw ur lug." I said around the yummy stuff trying not to chew.

"Ew gross Jess, cover your chops when you're sucking on that." Nat said sounding frustrated.

I reached up and pulled the half melted chunk out of my mouth and shoved it into the lock.

"Chocolate melts chewing gum so I should be able to get my key in the lock after this." I told her.

"Why would you want to do that?" My head snapped up from my work to look at the beautiful girl next to me.

"We need to get out of here." I said matter if factly.

"Why? I was in here already and I like it when you're here too." She said bluntly.

"Oh well I just thought..." I started but she cut me straight off.

"No Jess you don't think, you don't take into account your own feelings at all you simply run away from them when they start to surface." She took a deep breath keeping me transfixed as she continued.

"I know you've had your heart broken it's all over your face but I want to get to know you or at least explore our feelings for each other a little but you won't even go that far." She trailed off sadly and I stood there unable to move until I saw a tear tracking its way down her cheek.

The urge to comfort her began to take me over and for once I let it consume me. Diving towards her I acting purely on instinct tracing a path with my fingertips from her hand all the way to her cheek where I gently wiped the tear away.

I felt like I was somewhere above us, floating around spying on my own moment and I took comfort in the fact that the real me was back.

Slowly I cupped my hand under her chin and lifted her eyes to my own.

Her eyes were so misty I almost couldn't see myself reflected in them. I tried to speak but all that I managed was a squeak so I cleared my throat with a smile and tried again.

"I want that too, to explore what I feel for you. I just," I paused trying to get my thoughts inline. "I don't know how to feel everything at once anymore." I said honestly and her face brightened immediately.

"Finally, some truth out of you, I thought you'd never get there." She said her eyes betraying her happiness over her sarcastic tone.

"Well I'm here now and I'd like to try another date." I said reaching down to take her hand in mine.

"You have to ask then." She told me and I chuckled.

"Fine, will you please go on another date will me Nat?" I asked quietly leaning in a little more.

"Yes." She breathed out. I hadn't realised she was leaning in too because I could feel her breath hit my lips as she spoke and it drive me wild.

Adrenaline fired through me and I forgot to breathe when she pressed her lips to mine tentatively.

I shivered at the feelings sweeping through me just from the touch and my grip on her hand tightened.

When I didn't respond she began to pull away and I finally reacted followed her retreating lips and capturing them with mine kissing her for all I am worth.

My knees buckled when she wrapped her other arm around my waist and pulled me tightly to her and my lungs began to burn from lack of oxygen but the fire she'd started within me fuelled my lips to continue their quest against her.

I felt her let go of my hand and she pulled away slightly making a whimper escape my lips at the loss.

This seemed to spark something in her because I felt two hands grasp my sides and practically lift me backwards to press against the wall as she moulded herself to me.

I marvelled at how well we fit together before my mind was wiped clean at the sensation of her lips on my pulse point. I bit my lip but was unable to hold back the moan in my throat it has been way too long since I felt this way.

She left fast kisses along my jaw causing my skin to burn under her before my breath was stolen by her lips back on mine once more.

I found my hands had tangled themselves in her hair despite the cast on one of them and I used the leverage to pull her into me and licked her bottom lip, I wanted more.

She moaned into me and I smiled at her reaction to more forcefulness and took the opportunity to caress her tongue with mine.

I felt her freeze against me before letting out the sexiest moan I've ever heard and pressing herself harder against me leaving not an inch of space between our bodies.

Just as her hands began to travel upwards towards where I wanted them the door next to use opened and our two captors strolled in. I broke the kiss panting and felt Nat's lips leave open mouthed kisses on my neck, a sign of slowing down I thought.

I realised Nat hadn't noticed them when her hands carried on upwards grazing the sides of my breast making me squirm against her which only made me hotter.

My eyes closed and my head rolled back against the wall of its own accord as she ground herself into me and her tongue sent electric shocks down my neck.

A throat cleared loudly causing Nat to jump a mile accidently pressing one of her legs into my most sensitive place, _hard_.

I nearly came undone and I called out Nat's name loudly while she recovered from her shock.

I opened my eyes almost angry at their intrusion and saw the smirk on Spencer and Ashley's faces.

Nat was breathing heavily against my neck which was not helped my situation as I tried to glare at the two idiots.

"So Ash babe, looks like our plan worked." Smug clam jam 1 said to smug clam jam 2.

"I believe so Spence." Smug clam jam 2 replied.

"Why are they such clam jams?" Nat whispered in my ear and I burst into laughter.

I don't mean I just laughed like once; this was full blown chest aching, hands trembling and eyes streaming laughter that just kept returning.

When it finally subsided I looked up to find Nat's amused eyes staring at me and no Spence or Ash to be seen.

"We still need to talk about everything!" She said and I nodded quickly more pressing matters on my mind.

"They're gone?" I asked pulling her back towards me.

"Uhuh." She nodded.

I grinned at her lust filled eyes and flipped our positions.

"So what should we do now that we're alone again I wonder?" I said teasingly keeping her against the wall and my body away from her.

"I'm sure we'll figure something out." She smiled evilly before arching into me, I lost all control.

**SPOV**

When the first "Oh god Jess." filtered through the door Ash and I decided it was time for me to go back to work.

As we were walking back to the bar I noticed how dark Ashley's eyes had gotten and I smirked to myself. We are so getting it on before we leave for LA. It would be wrong to leave New York, the place where we found each other again, without me showing her how much I love her.

I took a deep breath to calm my heart which had suddenly starting beating really hard and glanced over my shoulder to find Ash eye fucking me.

I smirked at her and just walked out into the busy club to finish my last shift.

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><p><strong>Happy New Year! Hope you all enjoyed this chapter. <strong>

**The reviews have just inspired me a ridiculous amount so thank you everyone for taking the time.**

**Would it be okay for me to put a couple of M rated chapters in without changing the overall rating, as long as I alert you and give you an option out?**


	25. Chapter 25

_Anything written between the page break lines and stars has been written by the brilliant bduefbfsy who helped me because I'm terrible at writing smut. Enjoy._

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><p><strong>Chapter 25 <strong>

**SPOV**

I spent the rest of the night fantasising about the night Ash and I are bound to have before we move to LA. Her abs, her arms, legs, abs and, wait I thought about her abs already. God I should build a shrine or something to her abs I could spend all day looking at them.

"Hey Spency."

I would run my hands over every inch of her body, followed by my tongue finally meeting her lips with mine as I...

"SPENCER!"

I looked up to find Jess glaring at me with a... Grin? Scary looking sometimes that girl.

"Jessica?" I asked innocently.

"You've been standing there _not_ replacing that bottle for god knows how long! Care to tell me what had you sooo spaced?" She smirked in that irritating 'I just got laid' way.

I scrunched one side of my nose and squinted my eyes so I could sneer at her light-heartedly.

"You want me to guess instead? Fine." She said putting her finger to her chin as if in deep thought.

I tried to keep my face straight as I changed the bottle out for the new one and calmly walked through the back door to throw the old one in the recycling. Jess followed me so I threw her a tired but amused look over my shoulder. She just winked at me and stroked her imaginary beard with her forefinger and thumb, the wicked glint in her eye that had my nerves on edge.

I spun around to go back the bar but stopped short as a found Jess all up in my face.

I scrambled for a way out but she had me cornered. Damn.

"You know what I think Spence?" Jess said looking serious.

I shook my head slowly, the corner of mouth quirking upwards giving my amusement away.

"I think you should..." She paused for dramatic effect.

"What Jess?" I asked curious to hear her assessment.

"Get the fuck laid!" She told me before breaking into laughter at the dumbfounded look I'm sure is on my face.

"What? How? Why?" I stumbled out.

"You're wound tighter than a three day clock and you practically reek of frustration Spence." She said sweetly.

"Says the person who just got some." Not my best comeback.

"Exactly my little undersexed chicken," I'm sure Nat fucked up her brain. "I know when someone needs to get some and you and I are those people, at least one of is anyway." She finished.

"Speaking of getting some, you and Nat eh?" I wiggled my eyebrows at her trying to distract her.

"Mature Spence, that's private." Mission accomplished.

"Never was before?" I pushed.

"I know but this is... Different somehow." She said slowly.

"Aaaaaw Jessie's in lurve." I teased expecting a response; I was surprised when Jess remained silent.

"Jess, you alright?" I asked when her face went pale.

"Um, I, Oh god oh god oh god." She put her head in her hands worrying me.

"Jess hey what's wrong?" I pulled her hands away from her eyes so I could look at her.

"Spence?" Jess looked into my eyes and I saw fear and happiness swirling around, fighting for position.

"Yeah."

"I think I'm in love." I laughed out loud with relief pulling her into a hug.

"Oh Jessie, you scared me for a sec there." I mumbled into her hair.

I realised that she was squeezing me far too hard for a normal hug, then I heard her sniffle and she began to shake.

Wracking my brain for the reason she would be so upset about something so magical I started when I thought about Jess's love history.

I pulled her away from my body despite her efforts to cling on and forced her to meet my eyes with hers.

"Jess don't just listen to me when I say this okay, you need to hear me." My voice cracked as I watched the fear win out through the tears.

"You cannot give up on love because it might..." I couldn't continue and a tear ran down my face unchecked.

"But, what if... What if something happens again? I'm a curse Spence." Her broken voice shocked me out of my melancholy.

"Jess do you love me? As a friend?" I asked and she nodded straight away.

"Nothing bad has ever happened to me and its still love, you are not a curse Jess. You are a blessing to me, Nat and everyone else that is lucky enough to receive your love. Shit happens and I am so unbelievably sorry that those things happened to you Jess. But you can't live your life away from the woman you love just because of the past you'll hurt yourself and her." I ran out of steam feeling completely drained.

My best friends eyes slowly closed and she took several deep breaths before meeting my gaze once more. When she did I could see the strength I knew she possessed shining through.

"I love her." She told me with a stiff smile.

"Nat?" I asked and she chuckled darkly.

"No Ashley obviously." My bestie is back.

"Oh Jess what are you going to tell Nat?" I carried it on watching as she visibly perked up.

"That I love her." Her whole face lit up at the thought and I'm sure mine did too.

"That's great Jess, just make sure you're near a bed or something." I said jokingly.

"Speaking of beds." She said smiling at me, I brought this on myself this time.

"You and Ash should find one already." She said slyly.

"Jess we're..."

"Or a sofa."

"Jess..."

"Or a wall."

"Seriously."

"Hell the bar would do for you guys right now I think." She said thoughtfully.

"Are you done?" I asked impatiently.

"I _think_ so."

"Good, as I was saying. I'm planning to jump her bones at the next available opportunity." I said bluntly.

Jess looked at me blanking before laughing so hard she had to clutch her side to support herself.

"How is this funny?" I asked my face warming up.

"It. I. You." She tried to talk but had no breath whatsoever.

"Jeeess this would be our first time in years I what if I'm not good enough she's a friggin' rockstar." I said agitated.

"Okay Spencer it's not the thought that was funny, just how you said it she has the same look on her face when she's eyeing you every second she can." Jess explained and I let out a breath.

"Still." I started looking around frantically.

Jess put her hands on my shoulders and shook me gently.

"Spencer she loves you and she wants to fuck you, so chill." Jess tried to calm me down.

"What if we rush it too much and regret it?" I voiced my worries to my understanding friend.

"Look Nat and I just fucked up against a wall for our first time and it was still perfect even if it wasn't gentle or all mushy. You and Ash should just do whatever your lust tells you to then later on you can probably control yourselves a little better and _make lurve_." She tried to come off as dreamy but I don't think she pulled it off.

"So you're saying I should jump her get all the frustration out then we can go slow later?" I checked.

"Exactly." She said with a flourish.

"There is a lot of frustration." I agreed.

"I know it oozes off the both of you, Kyla agrees." I nodded then did a double take as I registered her words.

"You and Kyla?" I questioned.

"Talk? Yep all the time about you two love doves." She said.

"I think its love birds Jess." I laughed.

"Doves are birds." She looked confused.

"But the saying is birds."

"_Yeah_ so I substituted a bird in there, god Spence creative license." She said exasperated.

"That's so obvious I see it now so I can say things like 'I have a femur to pick with you' or 'my knight in shitty armour.'" I raised my eyebrows sarcastically.

"You think you're so funny." She hit back.

"Because I am." I said smugly.

"Sure sure so you can take your hilarious ass and lock up tonight so I can go put phase two of our plan into action." She said.

"Our what?" I asked confused.

"You know fuck her brains out then make love to her, that plan." She said as though it was obvious.

"Right," I clicked my fingers. "That plan, good luck." I hugged her again.

"You too Spence, I love you, you know, not as deep or as much as I love Ash but it's there." She shook with laughter.

"You make me feel so special, I love you too." I shook my head over her shoulder and reluctantly let go.

Jess began to walk away then turned slightly and caught my eye quickly.

"Clean my bar after Spence." She said cryptically.

"Yeah I always do boss no worries." I replied.

I watched my best friend leave through the building and shook myself before going back to my post; this is going to be a long night still.

**APOV**

I had to head over to the studio to finalise some paperwork for recording my album in LA later than planned giving me time to spend with Spencer after our move.

Walking into the reception the usual buzz of excitement hit me as I fed off the atmosphere in this place. It's only a small studio building but they work 24 hours a day seven days a week and they only make original music, my previous label hated me recording here because they would never go techno or put any old shit into my albums, I loved them for that.

"Hey Jonny." I said to the young guy manning the desk.

"Ash lovely to see you again, Kyla's running late so you can wait in the conference room." He told me quickly while picking up the phone to answer yet another call.

I sent him a smile as I made my way through the building into the conference room. It's not huge but the setting is warm and non-threatening like some negotiation tables.

Usually I'm say between my lawyer and Kyla at a clinical glass table squinting to see the people way over the other side. I've learnt to wear long sleeves because trying to peel cold and bare skin off the surface is a serious problem.

This table is made of wood and the chairs can spin and all sorts of fun stuff, yes I'm a child.

I sat down in highest chair and pulled the lever to send me hissing towards the ground. I laughed to myself thinking about how Spence and I used to have races to see who could reach the bottom first. Recently every time I think about Spencer the butterflies are accompanied by shocks all over my body at the thought of any part of hers.

Her legs, her ass, her face, her shoulders, her hair and now I'm uncomfortably turned on again. I have so many things I want to do to her but I can't help but think I might let the desire overtake everything and she'll regret it if I'm so rushed.

She used to like it rough (dirty talk especially) just as much as when we took it slow but I'm not sure what the protocol is for lovers who've been apart for so long. I'll have to ask Ky, she is the person most likely to not laugh at me for my nerves.

I thought back to mine and Spencer's first time, it was slow and tender, she was so nervous and I was not much help despite my extra experience. We helped each other but this time is different, we both have experience but now she has way more and I'm supposed to be a rockstar.

I crossed my arms and used them as a pillow on the table helplessly picturing every sexual encounter I want to happen with Spencer. I am so screwed.

"Ash?" I groaned from my place buried in my own arms at Kyla.

"Are you sick?" She sounded worried as she sat next to me and I felt her rub my back soothingly.

"No." I whined pathetically.

"What's wrong then?" She asked trying to coax me out of my bundle.

I lifted myself into a sitting position and examined my hands on the table.

"I want to have sex." I said.

"With Spencer?" She asked and I just laughed.

"Of course, but I don't know how to go about it." I admitted.

"Um Ash, you've done it before?" She tried but I just sighed.

"I know but every time I think about making love to her, it turns into a rough fantasy type thing in my mind and I'm not so sure if I can hold back enough. It's been so long." I hung my head.

"Oh Ash it's been too long your probably just horny." She explained patiently.

"Ya think." I turned to look at her and I could see her holding back her laughter.

"Ash," She giggled. "You are in love it doesn't matter how it happens, she'll love it either way I'm sure, and in fact she's probably in the same boat."

"You have a point." I said thoughtfully. Spencer was nearly always the one to initiate our encounters in public places and such, so she's probably worse.

"Just let it happen, I can feel the sexual tension from here." She said.

I laughed and shook my head at her feeling much more comfortable now that I realised Spencer may even be worse than me right now, I saw her pitch black eyes earlier she is hot for me.

The meeting went by in blur to me and I signed where Kyla told me to. Lost in my cloud of lust I vaguely heard Kyla say goodbye to the exec as I imagined taking Spencer up against the wall of this room.

"Ash!" Kyla broke me out of my cloud with a smirk.

"Hmmm?" Was my intelligent reply as Spencer's legs wrapped around me in my mind.

She opened her mouth to speak but was cut off by her phone.

I huffed as she answered it. I briefly wondered who was calling so late before Spencer thoughts took over again; I shivered in anticipation of the real thing.

"Hi how are you?"

"Yeah I'm good, what's up?"

"Oh _really_?" My head snapped up, this sounded interesting.

"She's the same; pupils are like saucers I tell you." I sneered at her when she winked at me.

"I'll let her know, yeah. You too Jess. Bye." Kyla finished up as I leapt out of my seat desperate to know what that was about.

"Well?" I begged.

"Jess tells me that Spencer is how do I put this?.. Going crazy with thoughts of you and her in compromising positions." She said.

"Really?" I said excited at the prospect of confirmation of her feelings.

"Really really so hop in taxi and go get your girl, it's almost 2am and Jess said she's left her alone to lock up." I heard Kyla's laughter as it followed my sprinting form out of the building.

Even if we're not ready and nothing happens, I want to see my girl.

* * *

><p><strong>SPOV<strong>

Left losing up the bar for Jess again I suppose I do live here anyway. I stood at the bar wiping off the counter. It was always so tranquil seeing a place like this so quiet. So still. Only hours ago it was buzzing with patrons, the music was drowning people in a sea of emotion, and you could smell the sex in the air.

The bar was just as beautiful still. I ducked behind the bar placing glasses back on their shelves. The bell over the door jingled, but of course silly me after ushering the last of the drunken patrons out. I left the door unlocked.

"Sorry we're closed!"

"Aw gee can't you make an exception for a celebrity?"

I knew that voice. I knew the smirked attached to that voice. Standing up so quickly I got a head rush I most certainly met the infamous smirk of Ashley Davies.

"Well hello beautiful. I was hoping I'd find you here."

"Ash." I felt the wave of school girl blushing coming on. I've never experienced anything else like this with anyone else.

She just smiles. I seem to have run out of words. She does that to me. I find myself too busy studying her beauty and what I want to do with it that I'm scrambling for words.

"Spence?"

I stopped fantasizing.

"Sorry…"

She just smiles that little half smile, damn, I've got to get a hold of myself.  
>"Want to help me close up?"<p>

She smiles again and I melt.

"Of course, Spence." I'm pretty sure my stomach just did a summersault. No one said my name as sweetly as Ashley does.

APOV

She's wiping down the bar and I'm mopping off the floors. I can't look away. I haven't moved my mop one bit. I've just been watching her. The way her hair falls across her shoulders, the way her head cocked to the side on occasion when noticing something new etched into the bar. She stands up and I realize I've just watched her clean the whole bar and I have cleaned maybe a foot of space. Oh crap. God, I quietly move a few meters away from where I've been glued. And begin to furiously mop the floors of the bar.

SPOV

I look and up and find Ashley mopping the floor. She thinks I don't know, but she hasn't been working for the past half hour. I could feel Ashley's eyes on me from miles away. The way she stares so intently, it burns through me. Ashley's afraid to look up at me, like if she looks up I'll know what she spent the last half an hour doing. I walk around her and she continues to mop. Jumping up on the empty stage it echoes as I land on my butt. My legs dangling over the edge.

"Hey." I call out softly to her.

She turns and smiles. An Ashley smile, not the Ashley Davies smirk she puts on as a show of how confident she is. I pat the empty spot next to me, again the hollow wooden stage echoes. She smiles props the mop against a table and shuffles over.

Her hands go in her pockets, both of them shoved in there like she's a 15 year old boy. If anyone studied her long enough they would know that's a telltale sign of Ashley Davies being nervous. I find it amazing how I can still read her like a book after all these years. She hops up next to me, taking her hands out and placing those delicate musical fingers on the cold stage. She turns to look at me and her brown eyes are burning into me. A strange feeling takes over me. I haven't felt it in years. A tingle, a spark just from a look. I gaze directly in her brown eyes and the desire I feel overpowers me. Before I know it the words push past my lips in a silent breath. A whisper. I barely feel the heat of the words on my lips.

"Kiss me."

APOV  
>Never were there any words sweeter in the history of humankind then hearing Spencer say that. I lean forwards and Spencer's eyes are already shut and waiting. Delicately I place my hand on her leg. Suddenly she's like the most delicate flower of all. The slightest sudden movement could jostle her and cause a petal to fall. Her breathing changes slightly in response to my hand resting on her thigh.<p>

I scoot closer and find my hand now carefully cupping her face. Pulling her chin forwards slightly I bring our lips together. We hold the light feathery kiss and my eyes flutter shut. We kiss for a while, just close mouth kisses. Sweet. Innocent. Meaningful. She breaks away first.

"Ash. I miss-I miss your…the way you…" she's struggling for the words.

SPOV

Ashley's hand on my leg made me want nothing more than to feel her touch me again. How do I put it delicately? I wanted her to feel me, to show me, to love me. What could I say though? Thankfully I didn't need to say a word. With broken fragments Ashley seemed to know. She pulled my face closer each kiss more intense than the last. I felt her tongue caress my lip softly. Once I grant her entrance she softly cups my head and lowers me down on the stage. One hand is gently moving down my neck towards my shoulder. The other one has begun to softly move up and down my thigh.

It's electric and I want nothing more than to feel her body on top of mine. And she does just that. She pushes back lightly and I comply lowering myself. I feel her arm move to cradle my neck as she lowers me softly, our lips never parting. Her other arm is now squeezing my leg and its sending shivers down my spine, and waves of arousal to my core.

Gently she manages to slip between my legs and she pauses and looks at me. She not so sure of herself anymore. I see the question in her eyes. Was I sure I wanted to do this. To be honest I didn't know the answer myself. My heart and brain didn't seem to belong to the same body. So I listened to my desire. My hands reached up and cupped her cheek softly. Her skin felt so soft under my palms. She followed my hands as I guided her back towards me and our lips met again. She relaxed into the kiss and my confidence pours into her like warm liquid.

**APOV**

She pulled me into a kiss and it ignites a spark in me. There's no question that she may not want me. She wants me and I want her. I cradle her back in my palms and deepen the kiss. My other hand is resting on her thigh and I can't help but drag my nails along her leg. I feel her shudder, and her hand has moved to the back of my head and I feel her grip tighten slightly.

I feel for the hem of her shirt and she arches her back. I pull up her shirt and it falls to the floor. I trace my fingers lightly along her stomach and she inhales sharply. She pulls me down again and our lips meet. She traces her fingers on my back and I shiver. She pulls at my shirt and it drops on the stage next to hers. I feel her warm skin upon my torso as I lay her down again. I trace my fingers just under her bra. I can feel the desire radiating off her body. And as I lean down again to capture her lips I feel wrap her arms around me and roll us over.

**SPOV**

Screw this. 6 years, 6 years of not having her. I am too impatient for this. I flip us over and she looks at me shocked but I also see the desire in her eyes growing. I lean in and breathe deeply, moaning lightly in her ear. Her fingers tighten at my thighs. Her hand is tracing down my spine and with a flick of her fingers my bra slips down my arms.

She notices my urgency and complies. We're shedding clothes fast. Our hands become frantic, our kisses messy. I feel her hands unzip my jeans and immediately mine go to hers. We're suddenly naked and her bare body is all over mine. I feel the fire burning and I want nothing but for her to touch me. She can tell by the way my hips move trying to make any contact possible. Finally neither of us can wait. We're done teasing. It was as if our minds worked as one and we both made the decision.

**APOV**

I see her eyes turn that beautiful dark sea water blue. She pushes me down and before I know it our clothes are piled recklessly to the side and she's on top of me naked. She bends down and captures my lips. I feel myself hold onto her and intensify the kiss. I roll us over and my hand shoots to her breast. They always fit so perfectly into my hands. I feel her moan into my mouth.

Moving down I bring my lips to her nipples and brush lightly at them before slowly tracing my tongue over one. She shivers. My other hand busies itself on her other nipple, I trace it, flick it, swirl it. My tongue gives the other nipple the same treatment and she grabs onto my back. I rock myself gently against her pushing against her wetness and she moans deeply. She whispers a soft plea.

**SPOV**

"Please"

I can't help but whisper frantically in her ear. I hadn't felt this flame in years, and she was taking it much too slowly. She complies and I feel her hand delicately tracing down my leg and she dips into my need. I'm so wet I barely even feel her fingers but I most definitely feel them when they make contact with my clit.

I hold onto her and rock but she won't give me relief. I'm just about ready to reach down and do it myself when I feel her fingers circling my clit ever so lightly. I'm pretty sure this is what it feels like to fall into heaven. To teeter on the edge and see both worlds. The teasing glimpse of heaven but the reality of falling back to earth too close for comfort.

Ashley continued her circles, by now I've just melted into a puddle of incoherence. And I'm really hoping that whatever my mouth is trying to say is telling Ashley to do whatever's right. Whatever would make me feel the best. Ash always knew. I see her smirk at the state of me. But I can't think clearly enough to think of anything in my defence.

Finally now I can barely take it, she begins to put pressure on my clit and I think I may have exploded. I'm gasping for air it feels so good. I grab her body and pull her impossibly closer to me. My fingernails telling her I need her. She's quickened her pace and I feel myself nearing my orgasm. I slam my eyes shut and feel myself whisper frantically to her, "Fuck Ash, I'm so close."

And she stops.

**APOV**

I can't help but smile a little when I see the adorable disappointment etched in her face; her mouth open in a silent scream her nails drawing blood in my shoulders. Not that she was going to be left for long. I can't help but smirk as my slide my body down. I'm pretty sure she knows exactly what I'm doing because she spreads herself open for me and I loop my arms around her legs pulling her close to me. God, I've missed this.

**SPOV**

I feel her tongue on me and I lace my fingers firmly into her hair. I think I'm being really fucking loud, but I can't seem to care right now. She's hitting the perfect spot and I feel my orgasm building more intense than before. I'm pretty sure I'm leaving angry red marks on her back. She starts moving faster and I'm shaking now. She reaches up and begins to play with my nipples and I am pushed even closer to the edge. I feel it starting and grab for the stage my fingernails scraping uselessly on it for my dear life.

**APOV**

She's getting louder and I can feel her trembling beneath me. I speed up and put more pressure on her. She shakes violently and I know she's about to come. She starts moaning loudly and I feel her body tense up. I don't stop and she keeps screaming until I feel her body relax. She jolts and pulls me away from her and breathlessly whispers that she's too sensitive.

I can feel how wet I've gotten. Nothing gets me wet the way Spencer's moans do. I lay down next to her watching as she pants heavily. And before I know it she's on top of me. I can feel her shaking on top of me, and she's still breathing heavily.

"Spence don't you need to recover?"

"No, I need to fuck you." That got my attention.

Her voice is low and I feel my wetness intensify. She kisses me hungrily and I feel her hand slip down to my need. I shudder when she runs a finger through my lips.

"Ash baby you're so wet." She smiling at me. A sexy smile that only makes me wetter.

**SPOV**

My finger practically glides she's so wet. I bring the digit to my lips and taste her. She moans when I close my mouth over my finger. Fuck she tastes so damn good. 6 years I haven't tasted heaven like this. My hand goes back down to her hot centre and I tease her clit. She moans into my ear and it sends shivers down my back.

"Baby what do you want me to do?" I look into her eyes, the lust in them is overbearing.

"Eat me out baby. I want to feel your tongue on me. Make me cum." Her eyes burn holes into me with every word. I'm temporarily paralyzed by the hotness of this and when I finally feel my mind start working I realize I'm still staring into her darkening eyes. What the hell am I still doing up here?

I slide my body down hers. Making stops to tease her. One hand over her breast while I kneaded it. I hear her moan lightly. I bring my mouth to her nipple and snake my tongue out to flick it ever so slightly and she holds my head against her chest. I bring it into my mouth and swirl my tongue around it as I pull a drawn out moan from her lips. I pull away hands tracing down her stomach leaving butterfly kisses on my way down. I finally reach my destination.

I can feel the eagerness radiating off of her. I am so beyond teasing. Dipping down I delicately collect her juices. She shivers when my tongue comes close to her clit but I pull back before I come into contact. We can't have that can we? I pull back and taste her, breathe lightly across her need and she twitches ever so slightly. Having had enough I dive in greedily taking her clit in my mouth swirling my tongue around in. She jolts violently and gasps and I feel her hands grip my hair.

**APOV**

I tug harshly on her hair, and I think I hear her gasp in pain. I can't help it though; she is now sucking on my clit. I manage to loosen my hands from her hair to avoid hurting her again. She's still sucking on my clit and it has been so long since I've felt this aroused I can already feel my orgasm building.

She continues to suck on my clit and flick it with her tongue randomly. I'm so close, I can hear the blood rushing in my ears already. Then I feel two fingers enter me and curl up. Stars explode behind my eyelids as I slam my eyes shut. I think I'm screaming.

**SPOV**

"FUUCCCCK!" She screams as she cums all over my hand, I keep sucking as I draw out her orgasm. She's frozen. She's so beautiful. I finally feel her body sag down as she breathes heavily. I slowly lick up her cum careful to not hit her sensitive areas.

When I'm done she's finally regulated her breathing. I crawl back up to her, only now realizing that we're still on the stage and I pray Jess doesn't come waltzing in anytime soon. She's done it before. Leaving her phone, leaving her keys. I've dealt with my fair nights of Jess walking into my bar and waking me up from my slumber upstairs. Upstairs brilliant, with that realization I grabbed Ashley's hand.

APOV

She's dragging me across the bar. I'm still getting aftershocks and am half naked.

"Spence where are we going?" I asked breathlessly.

"Somewhere more private." She replied. She turned back to me sporting a sexy smile, "So we can continue this Ash?" She looks at me expectantly.

Well I can't say no to that.

* * *

><p><strong>Well this story is nearly at its end but I've started my new one and that'll be up soon.<strong>

**Hope you all had a good Christmas and New Year whether or not you celebrate either. Thank you for your support I feel priviledged that you chose to read my story. Let me know what you think xxx**


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

**APOV**

I woke up this morning to find a huge smile on my face and a pair of warm arms wrapped around me. I'm still exhausted from last night; my girl and I spent the majority of it showing each other how deeply we feel for each other.

When I tried to move I had to suppress a giggle because the arm tightened noticeably with every twitch. After a few minutes I happily accepted my imprisonment and simply turned my head to watch my beautiful girlfriend sleep

Ten minutes in and I'm jonesing for coffee and desperate to pee. Not my favourite combination of needs. Only one thing for it.

I blew on her face as gently as I possibly could and waited for her nose to scrunch up. I couldn't help the grin that appeared on my face when images of me doing exactly this one thousand times over flashed across my vision.

Watching Spencer wake up took me back all the way to our very first sleepovers when we hadn't gone further than kissing because despite my first impression on her. I was incredibly shy around her and the butterflies her presence put in my stomach prevented any intimate moments. It was actually Spencer that made all of the major first moves in our relationship. That is, until I finally got my act together around our one year anniversary.

Pulling myself out of my memories I saw Spencer was still sound asleep so I tried again but blew a little harder this time. I soon reaped my reward for my efforts as Spencer's nose scrunched and her eyes slowly blinked open. I ran my hand through her hair and she hummed at the touch her bleary eyes trying to focus on my face so close to hers.

"Morning Spence." I said quietly my voice slightly croaky still.

"Hi superstar." She smiled and I couldn't help but return it. I cleared my throat trying to prevent the lump forming in my throat from blocking my airway.

"You know, you don't have to do that anymore, I'm now that it actually happened." I saw her eyes brighten at the thought.

"Well then Miss Superstar we'll have to find a new morning conversation." She said as if it was obvious.

"Beginning of a new era type thing?" I asked.

"Exactly" She leant over and pecked me on the lips before untangling herself from me and running into the bathroom. Completely. Naked.

I flopped my head back into the pillow with a groan, Spencer's gorgeous but she's in the bathroom I really need right now.

A couple of hours later and I'm still only in a huge hockey jersey and a pair of boyshorts watching my girlfriend cook me breakfast.

"Okay Ash one bowl of captain crunch with barely any milk redaay." She sing-songed.

Alright maybe she wasn't exactly cooking but we have an unspoken agreement that we're re-enacting our first ever morning after. The lines when we first woke up are the same ones we spoke to each other every morning for three years. She said she wanted to remind me of my dreams so I wouldn't give up on them and clearly it worked.

"Are you going to eat that?" Spencer asked me and I nodded absentmindedly.

Out of the corner of my eye I spotted a spoon heading for my bowl.

"Hey hey no cereal stealing, get your own!" I whined as I batted her hand away but she just giggled and attacked my bowl more fiercely.

"Just one bite?" She begged eyes wide and so blue and pretty and... No concentrate.

I began to shovel the crunchy goodness into my mouth as fast as I could while using my other arm to elbow Spencer away from my precious cereal.

"C'mon c'mon please, you're going to..." I cut her off with my first cough as a piece of crunch slide down the wrong pipe and I began to.

"Choke." Spencer finished shaking her head while smacking me on the back.

Very unattractively I spat out half my mouthful along with the crap from my throat and looked apologetically at Spencer who just shook her head in exasperation.

"All you had to do was give me, the girl you're in love with, an ickle bite of your cereal and this could all have been avoided." I coughed one last time just proving her point.

I pushed my almost finished bowl of cereal towards her slowly grinning guilty at her.

"Oh nooow you want to share?" She said and I nodded.

"Well I don't want it anymore." She said pushing it back towards me. "It's all been spat on."

"You what? After all the spit and. Other. Things we shared last night?" I said disbelievingly.

"It's more on principal." She shrugged.

I rolled my eyes at her and went to get a cloth to clean up the spilled cereal from my hamster episode.

"If you hadn't gone all sneak attack with the spoon..." I started but stopped when I heard the indignant gasp Spencer emitted.

Damage control Ash. I grabbed a bowl and the cereal and quickly made her up a bowl, stashing a spoon in the waistband of my shorts.

"Here you go beautiful, your very own breakfast." I said proudly, handing her her own spoon.

"_Thank_ you." She exaggerated; I just smiled, pecked her on the cheek and pretended to walk to the sofa behind her.

She happily dug in to her brand new cereal and I almost felt bad about what I'm about to do.

I crept softly towards where she was hunched over the bowl and reached for my spoon as I got closer. I took a deep breath and leapt at her, grabbing her hip with one hand and covering her mouth with the other I whispered into her ear.

"You think you can steal my cereal and get away with it?" I breathed as she struggled weakly in my arms.

"Mmm Mmm m." She tried to lick my hand making my giggle.

"I did that thing with my tongue for you last night; I haven't done that in years, my tongue still aches." I kissed the spot behind her ear making her whimper. The hand on her hip with the spoon in crept around her body slowly, inching towards the bowl.

"And if I recall, you used to constantly steal my food at every meal just to piss me off." I whispered before nibbling on her earlobe, she squirmed with her eyes closed as my spoon dipped into her beloved crunch.

"You thought I didn't know, but it was because you like me when I'm annoyed huh Spence?" I teased her with little kisses down her neck; she tilted her head to the side giving me more access, right as I raised the spoon towards my mouth.

CRUNCH

When Spencer squealed and jumped up at the sound of me chowing down on her breakfast right next to her ear, I ran like the wind.

"Ashley Davies you big fat chicken, get back here!" She shouted after me.

After about five minutes I felt it was safe and I poked my head around the corner to look at the island. Spencer was already staring right at me looking like she wants to plonk the bowl on my head. So I decided to use the only tactic I had left, pity.

I looked down at my feet and twisted my fingers together trying to look small.

"You think I'm fat?" I sniffled.

I waited for any sign of a truce but none came. I looked up to find Spencer hunched over the table her head resting on her arms. Then I noticed her shoulders were shaking violently as if she was crying. My heart sank to my feet and I ran over to her.

"Spence honey what's wrong?" I said desperately, lifting her shoulders to get her to look at me.

She slowly rose up her shoulder's still shaking as she span around to look at me her features full of mirth.

"Oh god, I am such a..." I threw my hands up.

"Sucka." She finished for me still giggling as she wrapped her arms around my middle my hands coming to rest on her back.

"I can't believe I fell for that." I chuckled.

"Me either, but in future we both have a bowl of our own to avoid problems." She breathed a sigh into my stomach.

"Ah I think that'd be a good idea, at least we're out of that weird time warpy thing." I said relieved.

"You noticed that too?" She looked at me surprised.

"I was there, for both." I giggled.

"Major Déjà vu moments." She said but it was muffled because she stuffed her face back into my stomach, so it actually sounded like 'mpha eja oo mmnts'.

"You like it there Spence?" I asked and she nodded into me, it's wrong for me to get turned on by her there right?

"Wanna go lower?" I couldn't resist, I felt her lift up my top and a literal zing went through me at the feel of her fingertips on my midriff.

I looked down at her just as she blew a raspberry under my belly button; I squealed ridiculously loudly at the unexpected sensation but couldn't get away because of her arms squeezing me tight. When she finally let me go I shivered as she dragged my top back down over my exposed skin.

Once I had gotten over the shock I looked down to find my girlfriend smiling up at me, her eyes shining with love. Wordlessly she opened her legs and pulled me between them.

"I love you." She whispered with her forehead pressed to mine.

I felt rather than heard the words as she spoke them and my heart swelled until my chest was too tight to form a reply. My eyes became misty far too fast so I shut them tight and inched closer to Spencer's body until there was not an inch of space between our bodies.

She held me tight as I fought to regain control of my emotions as her words seem to have finally sunk in after all these years.

"I..." I started but was too choked up to continue. Spencer didn't seem to need my reply however because she simply cupped my face in her hands and brought me into the most tender kiss we've ever shared.

As her lips met mine I think I whimpered before I lost sense of everything except for Spencer's lips on mine.

I tried to push closer to her and deepen the kiss but she just kept me at bay almost, helping me rein in my desire and just feel her lips on mine for what it truly was.

"Oops, sorry guys." I heard in the background.

**SPOV**

God damn it Jess.

Just as I was ready to take our kiss to the next level I felt a tear hit my cheek, one I'm sure Ash didn't know had fallen, a voice broke through into my conscious.

I hesitantly pulled back and used my thumb to wipe the tear from her cheek, she sent me a shaky smile I'm sure to reassure me but I heard the subtle sniffle as I stood up to greet/murder my bestie. And Nat apparently.

"Hi you two, what are you doing here?" I questioned keeping Ash in my arms.

"Um well I was just wondering if you would help me interview your replacement today." Jess said sheepishly.

"She just dragged me here because she doesn't want to be without be now that she's got me, was that it babe?" Nat looked evilly at an uncomfortable Jess.

"Aw Jess you're such a softie." Ash has perked up then. I turned to smile at her and nudged her shoulder affectionately.

"Yes yes I'm a giant squish we know this now, can you guys help me with this thing pleeeeease?" Jess begged.

"I thought you were just hiring a new bartender?" I said.

"I was going to then I realised how much you and I actually work so, I decided to hire another manager." Jess said nervously. Moon is her baby, it took her months to entrust it to me so I have no idea what made her decide she could trust anyone else with it.

"Why?" I pushed, Ash cleared her throat uncomfortably next to me and I turned to her.

"Is there something I need to know?" I was starting to worry now.

"Spence," Jess called my attention back to her, "I'm moving." She informed me.

I stayed silent taking in the weird atmosphere in the room and wondered what they weren't telling me.

"Spencer, I accepted a recording contract." Nat said calmly and I wasted no time in squealing and running to hug her.

"Congratulations, with who?" Nat's gaze shifted over my shoulder to...

"Ash?" Nat said. Now it's coming together, I eyed my girlfriend carefully but she looked slightly taken aback by this information too.

"Um so you're saying yes?" She asked Nat.

"Yeah I text you last night, didn't you read it?" Nat looked upset; Jess had obviously taken time to tell her about our plan surprise surprise.

"Babe they were 'busy' the entire night just look at them both." Jess smirked.

"Oh, _oh_ right, sorry Ash I talked it all over with Jess and we agreed that we'd like to do it." She said with conviction. I however am back to being confused.

"Hang on agreed to do what?" I looked back and forth between them.

"Ashley you were supposed to tell her last night!" Nat said.

"I tried." Ash said weakly shuffling on the spot.

"Between rounds?" Jess stepped in, always the joker. I walked back to Ash and stepped around her to hold her from behind. I bent my head to whisper in her ear.

"What are they talking about Ash?" I whispered making sure my lips brushed the shell of her ear as I spoke and I felt her shiver.

"T-They're talking about an offer Kyla and I made Nat yesterday after her and Jess pealed themselves off each other." Hmm feisty.

"Oh really, I thought you left, what was the offer?" I whispered again but this time I grazed my teeth against her ear and grinned when she bit her lip to stifle her moan.

"Spence having a bit of an effect on you there Ash?" Jess teased Ash and she stiffened in my arms.

"You know it." I could hear her smirk in her voice as I breathed in her scent against her neck. I no longer care if this is unnecessary pda I'm enjoying myself too much.

"Offer" I reminded them.

"Sorry, Ky and I told them we could offer Nat a recording contract but she could choose her city and have full creative control right away rather than us controlling her every move." I squeezed her in recognition of the risk that type of deal could be for any good business.

"So Jess is moving and Nat accepts." I slowly pieced it together. "Are you guys coming to LA?" I squealed excitedly when they nodded yes and spun Ash in my arms to kiss her soundly, this was indirectly her doing.

"It's an adventure and I'll have my best friend and the woman I love in one place." Jess piped up.

I stared lovingly into Ashley's eyes just enjoying the moment for a little longer before I went to hug Jess.

"What will you do Jessie?" I asked her when my arms were safely back around Ash.

"I'm going to open another bar/club with the money I've made from Moon; keeping Moon running will mean constant funds too. _If _I can find a decent manager." Jess said. I forgot how good of a business mind she really has.

"So you need all of our help?" I said.

"Of course you're an awesome manager so you'll know if they know what they're chatting on, Ashley's presence will tell me how they react to famous brilliant musicians and Nat, well I just want her there to be honest." Jess smiled at Nat and earned a pretty deep kiss for her troubles.

I looked to Ash for her response and she just nodded with a smile, it could be fun.

"Sure, it'll be fun." I agreed.

"Good see you in an hour." Jess said and turned to leave.

"Hold up, an hour?" Not enough time.

"Yup bye." Jess shouted over her shoulder as she sprinted out of my apartment with Nat trailing behind rolling her eyes at her girlfriend's antics. Those two are going to be an interesting couple.

"Great, we better get ready." I huffed but my scowl was erased when Ash leant up for a long kiss.

"No worries babe, we can shower together." Ash said before turning and walking towards my bedroom.

"Oh yeah real time saver." I said sarcastically thoughts of Ash and I in the shower already invading my mind. When she pulled her oversized jersey over her head and tossed it beside her my heart about stopped.

"Coming Spence?" She said, tossing me a seductive look over her shoulder as she rounded the corner in just her boy shorts. My mind was made up.

"Wait for me." I shouted as I ran after my nearly bare girlfriend yanking my t shirt over my head as I went, nearly smacking into the wall. We are so going to be late to those interviews. Wait she didn't even tell us where they are?

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><p><strong><em>Hope you all enjoyed reading this chapter for it is the penultimate one of the main story. Next chapter will be the big finish (hopefully) which I have extended beyond belief.<em>**

**_Let me know if you're as into this as I am. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing._**


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

_One week later..._

**SPOV**

"Spencer, Spencer, Spencer, Spencer, Spencer." I heard my name being called, accompanied by a jumping Ashley. I could tell she was not planning to stop until I woke up completely, but she looked so cute bouncing around me that I pretending to be asleep so I could watch.

"Speeeeencer I'm tired baby can you wake up now please?" She puffed landing on all fours next to me her face an inch from mine.

"Alright alright you big baby, what's got you so excited. Are you _dressed_?" I said shocked. Normally I'm dragging Ash out of bed by her feet and into the bathroom in the morning.

"Of course I am, because today's the DAY." She said jiggling around with excitement while I struggled to think through the sleep fog in my mind. The day, the day, the day, the...

"Holy crap it's today!" I shrieked as I leapt out of bed immediately feeling to cold air chill my bare skin. I ran to pull on some sweats and a t shirt so I could be free to move around a lot today.

"Forgetting something Spence?" Ashley smirked at me from her position on the bed. I looked down and blushed bright red when I realised that not only was my shirt on backwards but that I had forgotten to put a bra on.

"Aaah I'm so excited, what time is it? When will the lorry be here?" I rushed out while trying to change; Ash had to come over to help me out of my twisted t shirt laughing at my situation all the while.

"And I thought I was the hyper one," She said with an adorable grin. "It's only seven; the truck will be here at nine." She told me as she pulled my t shirt over my head properly, my chest now safely hidden by a bra.

"I can't believe its moving day already." I murmured reality slowly sinking in. I'm leaving New York, today.

"I know our own house, garden and all." Ash nuzzled into my neck wrapping my arms around her in the process leaving my hand on the small of her back.

"Garden, we have a garden." I said slowly, testing out the idea.

"And a kitchen." I grinned at the notion that Ash thinks a kitchen is exciting. "And my own studio!" That's more like it.

Originally we were going to move in Ashley's house in LA but we talked about it late one night and decided we wanted our own place just for us. So we sent Kyla to look at places for us as she was already in LA.

We had ridiculously high demands as Ash wanted a full studio, three bedrooms, home theatre plus many other requirements. It's a good thing she has money or we would be screwed. However Kyla knows both of us extremely well, and for some unknown reason, knew exactly where to look and found us a house that hadn't even been put on the market yet.

She took us on a virtual tour using a live feed camera and we fell in love with the place. I'll admit I was a little shaky about not seeing it before we bought it but Kyla managed to get us a stay on the contracts so we would technically be renting our home for the first six months. If we love it as much Kyla thinks we will then Ash said we'd buy it straight up.

The doorbell broke us out of our embrace and I chased Ash to answer it. She flung it open giving way to a bunch of our friends who came pouring through the door carrying various snack foods and packages.

"Hi everyone" I shouted over the babbling voices.

"Sup guys." Aiden headed straight for the coffee machine followed closely by Madison who didn't even both to say hi, just mumbled the word caffeine over and over.

I turned to see Ash hugging Jess and Nat who would be joining us in LA in a few weeks. Jess needs to make sure Amelia, the new manager, can handle herself without her around.

Music started up throughout the apartment and I rolled my eyes at Glen's eager face piling boxes up opposite the sofa. Most of the stuff in this apartment belongs to Moon and this will probably be rented out to someone new fully furnished. The only things we had to pack were my personal belongings, Ashley's stuff was already moving in thanks to Kyla.

"Hey baby," I smiled as I heard her voice next to my ear and her arms come around my waist. "You look stressed." She sounded worried.

"I was just thinking about all the furniture we need to buy for the house when we get there." I said thinking about our flight later today.

"I can't believe we're flying in." She checked her watch. "Eleven hours."

"Ash?"

"Yeah?"

"Why the fuck are we up so early?" I smiled looking around at all of our friends and family as Ash just laughed behind me.

"Jesus Spence if I had known you have so many clothes I wouldn't have offered to help." Glen complained as he carried another box of my clothes, heading for the lorry downstairs.

"Firstly, I asked you here so I could see you before I leave; secondly the devil will be driving a snow plough before you offer to help someone move." I joked.

"Go Spencer!" Madison cheered and hi fived me with Aiden chuckling in the background.

"Sibling love isn't it Glen?" I nudged him, almost making him drop the box he was carrying.

"I don't know I'm pretty sure I hate you right now." He squeaked as he strained to keep the heavy box balanced as he started down the stairs ahead of me.

"Okay people let's move we've only got a few more to go before we're done then we can have pizzaaaa." Ash tried to motivate our tired friends, we had been moving things around and cleaning the apartment all day and it was now past 2, we have to leave for the airport in a couple of hours.

We all giggled when we heard Glen's footsteps quicken down the steps.

"Oh god that was so unbelievably good." Glen licked each of his fingers after his last bite of pizza and sat back rubbing his stomach.

"So true." Aiden groaned through his mouthful.

We were all sat in my lounge which was now bare of everything except for a few shelves that were here when I moved in. Jess let me have my sofa but I was unable to pry my island off of the floor, eventually Ash and Nat had to pry _me _off the floor.

"When will your stuff get to LA Spence?" Madison asked and I looked at Ash for the answer, unfortunately she was too engrossed in her pizza to listen in to our conversation. I balled up a bit of pizza box and threw it at her hitting her square on the forehead.

"Mmm ey Slplenca." She said indignantly through her mouthful dropping the unfinished slice on her lap.

"Sorry Ash but Mads has a question." I explained, trying not to give in to the cute pout she was unleashing and just kiss her senseless.

"Yes Ash when will Spencer's stuff be in LA, a week, two weeks?" I had also assumed the truck would take ages to reach LA but Ashley was started to shift around suspiciously.

"Ash" I warned. "What did you do?"

"Nothing." She said innocently, trying to save herself but my arched eyebrow told her I wasn't buying the act.

"I did nothing." She tried again obviously she knows I'm not going to agree with whatever she did so I shuffled over to be right in front of her and looked her directly in the eye.

"Ash I'm going to let the fact that you just lied to me go and ask you again what you did or didn't do that you think I will get mad about?" I said gently with a background of teasing 'oooohs' from our audience.

"Um I definitely did not put all your stuff on a private jet flying to LA." She admitted shyly.

"But Ash we agreed that we wouldn't use that sort of thing because of the cost, you know I can't afford it." I felt bad that she has to keep paying for things because I don't even have a job yet. She got me to agree to stop searching until we actually get to LA because it's not like I could interview if I didn't even know where I would be living.

"In that case I most definitely did not hire movers to put everything in the house before we get there." She broke eye contact and tried to escape my look.

"Ash my underwear is in there!" I said appalled that men would be going through my things.

"No no no no no, not like that I just meant they'll put all the boxes in the house, I want us to unpack together, decide where stuff goes, put shelves up, buy food, all the coupley stuff I've always wanted to do with you." She looked desperate now, she must have thought she'd really upset me.

"That's so sweet, and it saves you the trouble of heavy lifting, that shit is not sexy." Madison chimed in. Even the boys were nodding.

"And I happen to agree." I said laughing at the look of pure relief on Ashley's face. She scooted forward and threw her arms around me.

"Thank god for that, I thought that was a deal breaker, you weren't supposed to find out." She breathed.

"I'm sure, but you are a shit liar." I chuckled and she pulled back smiling.

"Are you kidding me with this?" Madison scoffed, "Ashley used to lie about all sorts of crap all the time, it's _you_ she can't lie to Spence."

"Aw is that true babe?" I teased her my eyes giving away how touched I was by that.

"No" She pouted, this time I didn't hesitate to press my lips to hers.

I forgot about everything else as Ashley pushed herself into me and kissed me deeply.

"Whoa no one wants to see that." Glen pretended to wretch.

I just pretended not hear him and gripped the sides of Ashley's shirt before straddling her , running my hands up to her shoulders and neck to pull her closer.

The moment she moaned I smiled into the kiss then jumped a mile when I felt something cold dribble down over my head.

I looked up to find Glen and Madison with a glass of water each pouring them over our heads.

"Just as it was getting good." Aiden sounded disappointed.

Glen narrowed his eyes at my glare and continued to spill the water onto my hair effectively making me look like a drowned rat.

"Glen!" Madison slapped him upside the head. Ashley just pulled my face back to hers and kissed me sweetly.

"Am I forgiven?" She asked.

"Hmm you can make it up to me." I grinned.

"How?" Her eyes darkened and I'm sure I know where her thoughts had gone.

"You can put up the shelves by your damn self." I kissed her frowning forehead once before I got up and went to find my suitcase with a change of clothes, I'm so glad I'm not wearing a white top today.

I walked into my old bedroom and changed but as I was about to walk out I realised I hadn't had a minute to myself all day. I sat down on the edge of my bed and let my head settle. I let these past few months sink in, the memories washing over me slowly.

First I'm following my dreams and about to graduate with quite a few good job offers, then I'm minding my own business working a busy shift and Ash dances with me in the sexiest way possible before sweeping me completely off my feet.

I finally listened to her album and I still feel a pang in my chest when I think of how long I waited to hear what she had to say even though it was there the whole time, just waiting.

The thought of the concert still brings a smile to my face, she knew I was there and that song is one of the best, I'm sure it will be at number one the second it comes out.

She's so beautiful all the time and I cannot wait to live with her for the rest of our lives.

I looked up when I heard the door click open to see Ashley's smiling face.

"Hey you, thought you were coming back?" She said softly, shutting the door and coming to sit beside me.

"I was just thinking." I said looking back up when I felt her take my hand and press something into it.

"One hundred dollars?" I questioned but she just took my hands in hers and ran her thumbs over my knuckles.

"Your thoughts are worth more than a penny." She said with a cheesy grin.

"You're so silly sometimes." I laughed at her cheeky grin.

"I know, but I am genuinely curious what were you thinking?" She frowned when I didn't answer right away but I squeezed her hands to reassure her.

"I can't believe how lucky I am." I told her honestly.

"You deserve everything Spence, we've both waited far too long to start our life." She pushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear and I leant into her touch.

"How do you always know the right thing to say?" I asked with a smile.

"Just really good guesses." She shrugged.

"Hmm, well Davies I'm glad you take the trouble to guess for me." I pulled her into a hug and nuzzled into her neck.

"Always Spence, I'm in love with you." She whispered.

"Same... I can't wait to see our house." I said with my lips against her neck.

"Not long to go now, we have to leave in a little bit, the others are dead set on coming to the airport with us by the way." She grumbled, she hates goodbyes.

"I thought they might want to." I admitted, "But we love them and it might be the last time I see my brother for a while."

"I know Spence, just try not to cry." She said.

"I'm not sad to leave so there will be no crying, I'm going home." I said.

"Interesting." Ash said and I pulled back at her tone.

"What is?"

"Oh I just thought of some song lyrics, that's all." She told me, I could see her mind whirring.

"From that?" I said disbelievingly.

"What can I say? You inspire me Carlin." She ended with a sweet kiss to my lips before pulling me to my feet.

"Alright superstar, let's go so I can say goodbye to Moon." I said as I led her out of the door and back to our friends.

"You got all your bags and stuff checked in?" Glen asked me and I could see the sadness in his eyes letting me know he would miss me. We may have our sibling rivalry moments but I love the oaf.

"Yeah" I said and looked at Ash who silently nodded, walking away to give me some time alone with my Brother.

"Spencer, I need to ask you something." I knew what was coming so I just nodded. "Are you going to see her?" He asked.

"Someday, but not anytime soon, I want to enjoy going home first." I told him honestly.

"Will you let me be there when you try?" Glen sounded like he was in pain thinking of me against our mother without him.

"Of course, you're my big brother I need you for protection." I laughed at his smug expression.

"Damn right you do. Anyway we better get over there, your girlfriend looks like she's missing you already." I glanced over to the other little group and saw Ashley was staring hard at me.

"I think you may be right." I laughed and we exchanged I love you's and a giant hug before I walked back into my girlfriends arms.

**APOV**

I watched Spencer's face drop when she was talking to Glen and I nearly ran over to comfort her but I knew that the topic they were sure to be discussing was there's to deal with. All I can do is be there for Spencer while she sorts through her issues with her family.

I smiled when I saw her mood lift and a grin broke out when she walked back over to me, I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her cheek.

'_First boarding call for flight 208 to Los Angeles California, please proceed to gate 17'_

Spencer beamed at me.

"That's us guys, time to go home!" She sounded so excited and I felt my heart beat that bit faster, it must be contagious.

"We're gonna miss you guy's so much." I joined in with the hugs saving Madison and Aiden for last while Spencer spent the last few moments we had in New York with Jess, Nat and Glen.

After what seemed like no time at all I felt Spencer thread her fingers through my hand and pull me towards her.

We walked through the final checkpoint before the gate backwards, waving to our friends and smiling from ear to ear. When we were out of sight around the corner we spun around with Spencer almost skipping towards our gate.

"Look out LA, Spencer and Ashley are coming home." She squealed when we saw our gate with the queue of people.

"Let's go Spence; we have a home to see." I grinned as she sped up only to be jerked back by my hand pulling her towards the first class gate. For once she didn't argue, just rolled her eyes and carried on in the right direction.

The last thing I saw before we boarded was Spencer's smiling face asking me if I'm ready.

I nodded and boarded without a second glance back, following the love of my life to start our new life.

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><p><strong><em>This is pretty much the end, but I'm so reluctant to let go so I have one more chapter and an epilogue or two after this.<em>**

**_Thank you for the amazing response, hope you enjoyed this chapter._**


	28. Chapter 28

_I had absolutely no idea how to end this so I just wrote this and I will do lots of epilogues etc. **M rated.**_

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><p><strong>Chapter 28<strong>

**APOV**

The last 24 hours have been such a blur. Kyla met us at the airport after our rather eventful flight. Minds out of the gutter though because what actually happened bears no resemblance to my fantasy.

It seems I had romanticised the idea of flying to LA because my fantasies included joining the mile high club and drinking lots of champagne. Unfortunately the reality was quite different, I hadn't known about Spencer's fear of flying or more specifically, 'dying in a tin can that falls out of the stupid sky'.

She also neglected to inform me of this fear before she damn near broke my hand as she clutched it during takeoff. Normally I would have loved to be needed but I'd been unable to prepare for the pain, it would have saved the other passengers ears.

After having our sibling greetings were photographed in the airport Kyla ushered us into a waiting car to be driven to our new home. Spencer's reaction was by far my favourite moment of the whole trip.

**SPOV**

When I walked into our new home my knees actually buckled a little and my jaw hit the floor with a thunk.

"Wow Kyla wasn't kidding, I love it!" Ash exclaimed from beside me, squeezing my hand.

I tried to reply but my jaw just flapped uselessly and all that came out was a weird whimper. My face felt hot and my eyeballs started to sweat.

**APOV**

I stared at her beautiful face and just watched her take everything in. Her mouth was slightly open her cheeks bright red and her eyes watering.

Our lounge was stunning, the shiny marble floor offset by a giant brown and cream rug an L shaped sofa placed perfectly in the middle. Behind the lounge area we could see the wall almost entirely made of glass looking out onto our pool area.

Instead of the usual door into another room our living room there was a simple gap in the actual wall leading to the downstairs bathroom and bedroom while the second floor was clearly visible above us though a clear half wall.

I knew from memory that the kitchen was near the window wall but around the corner so it would be out of sight of the sofa but near the dining room leaving the relaxed atmosphere in here intact. Wooden panelling also ran along a strip of wall behind the sofa up to the ceiling adding unexpected warmth to the room.

I could understand why Spence was a little off balance looking at our surroundings, the camera did not do it justice.

**SPOV**

"I cannot believe this is really happening." I said to Ash, overwhelmed at my surroundings.

"Well believe it Spence, this is the first day of the rest of our lives, finally together." Ash said, soudning so utterly happy I almost cried.

"I love you." I said happily pulling her into a tight hug.

"I love you too, so much." She replied into my ear before pulling back and leaning in for a kiss.

As our lips touched I felt the familiar jolt of electricity and immediately crushed our bodies together.

Soon enough we pulled apart gasping for air, I didn't give Ash any time to recover however as I began to kiss slowly along her jaw and down her neck, nipping at her pulse point in my way. I enjoyed every shiver I managed to elicit on my journey back to her lips.

I backed her up to the nearest wall noticing the quality of the soft wallpaper as I forced myself closer to my girl, driving her up the wall as I did so.

I ran my hands underneath the hem of her shirt and lifted it to cup her bra covered breasts drawing out a moan.

Soon the barriers seperating us became too much and I pulled away revelling in the almost black eyes of my girlfriend and her heaving chest. Seeing what I did to her in with only a few kisses drove me wild and something inside me snapped.

I roughly grabbed the collar of her shirt and literally ripped it open and pulled it down her arms, throwing it behind me not caring if I ruined it.

"Oh my _god_ Spence." Ashley panted watching me rip my own jumper form my torso and pulled me back into her our stomachs rubbing together, the snesation driving me crazy.

My hands found her chest and my lips found hers once more as I continued my assault. Bypassing the usual etiquette I yanked the bra cups down and off my girlfriends chest allowing my eager mouth to own her.

Her hands tangled my hair as I caught first one nipple iin my mouth then pulling away in blowing on it before paying equal attention to the other. My unoccupied hands undid the clasp on her bra and I pulled back again to take it fully off. I realised my bra was also loose and I smiled at my girlfriends quick thinking when horny.

Running my hands up and down her sides and all over her abs and chest again I kissed her again loving her arching into me and air of desperation in her movements.

"Someone's eager." I breathed into her ear nipping at the lobe while undoing the button and zip on her jeans and pushing them down. I almost giggled when she didn't even try to help me get them off obviously too distracted by my teeth.

I dipped my head to catch her lips in a tender kiss before kneeling down and pulling her jeans all the way off staring into her eyes for as long as I could before her glistening folds stole my focus.

I started at her right knee and kissing my way up her outer thigh then around to the inside before kissing back down and running my hands form her ankles to the back of her knees and back.

Her hands in my hair attmepted to drag me towards where she wanted me most but I resisted and she writhed against the wall instead, moaning almost everytime my tongue touched her skin.

After repeating my torture on her other thigh I ran my hands up from the backs of her knees to her ass grasping it as I stood to my full height claiming her lips once more loving the feel of her body arching into mine her nails digging into my back.

"Please Spence." She begged when my mouth returned to her neck and my right hand traced a path lower.

I grinned into her neck and cupped her underneath her panties, drawing out a gasp as ten nail marks were etched into my back.

Running my fingers over her softly she tried to cant her hips against my hands but my other hand held her firmly against the wall preventing the movement and frustrating her to no end.

Slowly I knelt back down kissing a path down the centre of her body as I went. I looked up just as a let one of my fingers trace over her clit and I saw her throw head back against the wall her eyes scrunching up in pleasure.

I couldn't resist the urge to taste her so I pulled my hand away and removed her panties throwing her leg over my shoulder immediately after.

I dove in eagerly tracing my tongue around her clit and down to her centre, she was unbelievably wet and I moaned at the taste. Her hands tangled themselves in my hair again and she gripped harshly and moaned when I applied a little pressure to her entrance which escalated to an outright cry of pleasure when I entered her starting up a rapid pace without a second thought.

He hips rose up off the wall defying my grip on her hips as she rode my face impatiently. Her breathing picked up and I could practically feel her heart throbbing through her core as I drove her to the edge.

"Don't stop, please... fuck... don't stop." Ashley begged again when she felt my pace slow a fraction.

I smiled at how sensitive she must be to have felt the tiniest change so I removed my tongue completely hearing her whimper desperately before she felt my fingers enter her hard.

"Jesus fuck keep going." She panted her voice rising in pitch.

I circled her clit with my tongue and pumped my fingers faster feeling her tense even more and begin to moan out almost every thrust. I crooked my fingers and flicked her clit frantically with my my tongue throwing her mercilessly over the edge.

She almost screamed my name as she stiffened and came all over my hand, my fingers could barely move inside her.

Eventually she came down from her high and I removed my fingers slowly standing up on numb legs to kiss her once more.

**APOV**

I'm pretty sure my mind is officially blown right now, I can't feel my legs and my body is still shaking with aftershocks.

I barely noticed Spencer stand up until her lips were on mine and I couldn't help but kiss back sloppily, slipping my tongue into her mouth to tangle with hers. She tasted like me and I couldn't help the shock of arousal I felt at the memory of what she just did to me.

I realised pretty soon that standing was not going to be an option just yet and I grinned madly when Spencer turned around offering me her bare back and bending her knees.

"I love you." I said as a I kissed her back and dragged myself on.

"I know, I'm sorry about the plane." She said while searching for the bedroom.

"It's not your fault it just means no mile high club." I joked.

"Maybe one day but not anytime soon." She told me sternly.

"How about for our honeymoon?" I whispered into her ear grazing the shell with my teeth and revelling in the shiver that ran down her spine.

"Mmm." She agreed then sighed in relief when she opened a door to find the amazing master bedroom.

The bed was kingsize with two bedside tables and huge windows a few feet away with a great view over some of LA.

"Wow." I said again as Spencer turned around and sat me on the bed, falling back when I grabbed her waist tightly to stop her getting up.

"Don't go." I whispered.

"I'm not going anywhere baby, but I really need to get these jeans off." She shuffled uncomfortably and I grimaced at how the material probably felt right now.

"Sorry baby, let me help." I said while pulling her backwards on to the bed so I could move around and straddle her.

I stared into her blue orbs as I undid the button on her jeans and slid them off of her.

Needless to say not a lot of sleep was had that night.

I am so happy to be home.

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><p><em><strong>Thank you so much to everyone who has read and especially those who took the time to review. You were amazing and inspiring and I would love to write more for you guys.<strong>_

_**If you can I would really appreciate a review with your overall comments about the story; criticism, smiley faces, rating out of ten or random comments anything would be really really cool.**_

_**Thank you again!**_


	29. Epilogue One

_So excited to finally be posting this. I missed you guys a lot other fandom's just aren't as cool. Been working on this for quite some time, it's definitely **M rated **and about five chapters worth of any of my normal stories. Enjoy and please let me know if you like it. Eeeeek I'm so happy to be back._

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><p><strong>Epilogue One<strong>

**APOV**

"Spencer Carlin, I have loved you for so long and I fall more in love with you every day, would you do me the honour of being my wife..." I said as the butterflies in my stomach destroyed me.

"Oh my freakin' gawd, that has to be the cheesiest proposal I have ever heard in my entire life." Kyla shouted from the door to the bedroom I share with my beautiful girlfriend.

"Mother fucker!" I shouted as I jumped backwards dropping the ring box and clutching my chest instead. "Kyla!"

"Hey Ash, I came over to talk to you about the tour stuff but you seem to be a little busy." Kyla teased me.

"I'm free and you will be forgetting what you saw here today and not mentioning a word of it to my girlfriend okay?" I demanded.

"Sure sure sis, not like it's one of the biggest moments of your lives or anything." She said sarcastically.

"Ky." I warned.

"Fine tour stuff first, Spencer stuff later, she at work?" Kyla asked.

"Yeah she loves it too." I smiled as my mind travelled to her.

After less than three months in LA, Spencer had already been talent spotted and score a spot directing a new TV show focussing on the lives of two lesbians. She hadn't wanted to do it at first but its amazing experience and it gives her time to write her first indie project, she's being pretty secretive about it but I bet it's brilliant.

My career has been going swimmingly. The new album entered the charts at number one and I have been rushed off my feet ever since. Between promotional shizz and Spencer I have had little to no time to buy the ring and plan the best proposal ever. What's worse is that I can't seem to come up with any good ideas. I'm supposed to be a creative genius yet I can't even ask my girl a simple question in a decent way.

"Ashley?" Kyla waved her hand in front of my face and I looked up at her blinking my worries away.

"Sorry, I'm alive what did you need me for?" I asked quickly.

"Well, I know one of your stipulations for this tour was one show per week, but I can't the two opening shows in New York that far apart?" Kyla said apologetically.

"Oh well how would it work out?" I asked curiously. I had had it written into my new contract that I would not be required to play a large venue outside of LA more than once a week. That way I can come back and spend more time with Spencer. Hopefully to plan our wedding.

Kyla proceeded to fill me in on the reasons why I would need to do two shows in three days next month, it sounded like bull to me but I nodded along until the end.

"Kyla I don't see any real reason why the shows can't be further apart, Spence is coming with me and I want to spend at least a week there, you know that." I said keeping most of the frustration out of my tone.

"Stop stressin' Ash there's no reason why you and Spence can't spend the week in New York, just think; you wouldn't even have to leave the hotel room after the second show." Kyla said sweetly. My mind veered off down a seriously hot track before I pulled myself together as a bright light flicked on in my skull. It lit up my entire world for a few seconds and I grabbed Kyla's shoulders excitedly.

"Okay, one minute you're all I don't wanna do two shows in three days, I mention a hotel room and you're suddenly all perky, is Spencer really that good?" Kyla asked incredulously.

"Better." I answered as if it should be obvious. "But that's not what I was thinking." I finished. Kyla raised her eyebrows disbelievingly at me.

"Really?" She said.

"Really really, listen." I told her taking a deep breath to sort my head out before continuing. "What if I proposed to Spencer in New York?" I asked tentatively.

I waited with baited breath as she seemed to consider me and the idea before answering.

"Just tell me one thing first, why New York?" She posed the question curiously and I barely had to think before my answer came tumbling out.

"It's where we found each other again, it's where everything re-started, like a phoenix rising from the ashes of our mistakes and now we're happier than ever!" I explained. Kyla was silent for a minute but then a huge grin split her face, matching mine perfectly.

"Oh yeah that is the city, where would you do it?" Kyla was getting as excited as I was not, the butterflies were really getting going and my heart was pounding in my chest. "On stage?"

"Too flashy." I replied, that's definitely not something Spence would want.

"In the theatre you took her to?"

"Not special enough." I shook my head.

"Moon?" She smiled as my mind could be heard whirring away.

"Possibly." It was the place we'd been the second first time I'd seen her after all.

"Yeah you could do it like on the bar or something, lying down maybe?" Kyla said striking a sexy pose against the breakfast bar. I just rolled my eyes at her antics while imagining the comical look on Spencer's face if I ever actually did propose while lying on the bar. Naked maybe? No let's not go there.

**SPOV**

"Cut, okay everyone that's a wrap, let's pack up and go home!" I shouted out onto the set. I smiled wide when my whole crew cheered loudly and I received numerous hugs for wrapping two hours early. Obviously they also had hot girlfriends they wanted to get home to.

"Hey Spence," once of the actresses came up to me cautiously. "I was wondering how we were going to do this scene tomorrow?" Kaylie looked genuinely nervous and I wondered why it took her so long to come to me about this. I know she's not gay or even bi but she has always been sensitive to her characters issues with her homophobic family. It's why she was hired.

"We talked about that in the production meeting last week; you wanna tell me what's really up?" I asked gently as I led her away from the bustling set and nosy crew members.

"I just, I can't help but think I'm not portraying the raw emotion of having your family reject you because of who you are in the right way." I felt my chest tighten with pain at the unknowing reference to my own family history and I winced noticeably. Kaylie looked down at her shoes, obviously embarrassed.

"Kaylie you are a brilliant actress and you're headed for the stars, the fact that you also care how one scene, albeit a very important one, will affect people is the other reason so many people will be banging down your door begging to work with you." I told her confidently keeping my voice steady and my eyes soft.

She opened her mouth to reply but was cut off by my assistant director calling out to me from across the set. I shot Kaylie a look of apology and shouted back. A few shouts later I learnt that we were all packed up for the night and the crew were waiting to be dismissed. I took a deep breath, there just aren't enough hours in the day sometimes and turned my attention back to the worried actress in front of me.

"Kaylie you can do this rehearsal was great." I tried to end the conversation but her shuffling feet let me know it was far from over.

"I don't know boss, I'm sorry." She was practically in tears now and she never called me boss, I realised she was about to quit on me, time for plan Z.

"Tell you what, Ash and I are going out tonight with a few of our friends most of whom are gay and don't mind talking about coming out, how about we all sit down with you and help you out a bit, would that help?" I asked praying that she'd say no but her eyes lit up at the idea.

"Oh my god really Spence that would be amazing inspiration." She said happily.

"I'll talk to Ash about it and text you with a time and a place if it's okay." I confirmed giving her shoulder a squeeze before making my way over to the now impatient crew.

Briefing and dismissal took seconds and before I knew it I was in a flower shop buying 'I'm Sorry' flowers for my hopefully forgiving girlfriend who was looking forward to a quiet, relaxing night out with Jess, Nat and a couple of friends we've made since we've been here, oh and Kyla. A night which I have now ruined with my sympathy.

**APOV**

When I heard Spencer's key in the door it took every bit of strength I possess to remain sitting down with my guitar. 'Act cool Ash act cool' I said to myself then rolled my eyes at my own sadness, so much for badass rockstar. Still, I forced myself to wait until Spence said hello, screwing my eyes closed I listened out for my cue.

"Ash?" Spencer shouted, I convinced myself she sounded unsure and raced to her rescue like the badass I am.

"HI baby?" I said happily as I slid to a stop on the wooden floors, my fluffy socks helping my speed immensely.

"Hi back." She greeted my with a deep kiss and I immediately lost myself in the feel of her. I grabbed her waist and pinned her against the wall somewhat gently and continued to welcome her home with longing kisses. I stopped when I felt her moan into my mouth; if we didn't talk right now we would be too distracted for the rest of the afternoon.

"I have to talk to you about New York?" I said breathlessly avoiding her lips as they followed mine when I pulled away. She pouted at me but nodded at my pleading look.

"Fine, I actually need to talk to you about tonight anyway." She said looking at something on the hall table, I turned my head and smiled when I saw the lilies. Looking between Spencer's guilty face and out official apology flowers I frowned questioningly.

"What about tonight?" I asked darkly but Spence just turned slightly pink.

"Um Ash, if we are going to talk can you not be..." She gestured to where our bodies were still tightly pressed together. I forgot how my lower register turns her on and if I wasn't so interested in what she was apologising for I would tease the hell out of her. Maybe just a little wouldn't hurt.

"Hmmm so you want me to separate my body from being close to my smoking hot girlfriend, who I love?" I asked kissing her neck and sucking lightly on her pulse point, I felt her shiver and I smirked against her skin.

"Ash!" She growled and I pulled away with a huff.

"Fine, we can talk first but it's your fault if I'm not in the mood afterwards." I complained playfully and she shoved me backwards in response.

"You were the one who wanted us to talk first!" She said pointedly.

"Not the point." I said stubbornly. She raised her eyebrows and I felt my heart give in instantly. I'm so whipped it's unfair.

Seeing my surrender Spencer grabbed my hand and tugged me towards our comfy couch and flicked the TV on quickly. We had discovered that we needed background noise if we wanted to have a semi serious talk or we would get distracted by other things and never get to the point; it was one of our weirder quirks.

"You go first yours is about the present." I said and she nodded looking apologetic already.

"So you know tomorrow we have that coming out scene with Kaylie." She started and I nodded, it was a big scene Spencer had slaved over even drawing on her own experiences to perfect it. "Well she freaked out a little today about not being able to execute it properly." Spencer trailed off and fiddled with her fingers. I took her hands to stop the fidgeting and stroked over the knuckles soothingly.

"What did you do Spence?" I asked though I already had an inkling.

"I invited her to come with us tonight so you could all talk about how you came out and stuff." She said quietly. My heart sank, this was going to turn into an overly emotional train wreck and I knew Spence knew that too. The look on her face was of utter dejection and I wondered why she had gone to such great lengths to support a cast member.

"Why?" I asked keeping my voice soft; I didn't want her to think I was mad at all.

"She was about to quit." Spencer said looking unsure of herself for a second.

"Spence don't doubt your instincts, if you think she was about to quit then the bitch was about to bottle it!" I said sternly and she smiled up at me, god I can't wait for her to be my fiancé, hell my wife. I am such a badass sap.

"Thanks Ash, now what did you want to talk about?" She asked with a cheeky grin while I groaned playfully.

I'm always in the damn mood.

* * *

><p>Two months later and I was shitting myself like full on palm sweating, brow wiping and body cringes nervous. For weeks I slaved over how I could propose to Spencer but nothing seemed good or special enough. It was so cheesy, even in my mind, no light could be as bright as Spence and it was kiiiiilling me.<p>

Kyla had teased me constantly before finally coming through and being the sister I have always had but obviously not known it; she's always a bit ditzy after all. She pulled out the long forgotten concert DVD of my ultimate gig in MSG. The one where I sang Spencer 'Ordinary People' the song that catapulted my album up the charts. Critically acclaimed and everything it is.

Incredibly watching that video switched on one of the brightest light bulbs ever to blink to life in my brain. So I put my head down and wrote Spencer a song that I could use to propose to her. Needless to say I wrote from my heart and it turned out crap. My song writing process had never once had a purpose, it was usually just about writing down a set off feelings or events often mixed. I had written Ordinary People from my mind, the melody and the way I sing is the stamp my heart puts onto it. Until it has a melody my words are just that. Words.

So I decided to sing Spencer's favourite song, unfortunately Spencer's favourite things often change with the mood she's in. The other major problem is that all her proclaimed 'favourites' are my songs anyway. I could not win with this.

I tried romantic and loving, it sounded corny, I tried loud and heartfelt, it sounded demanding so one day I just stopped trying. I sat down with my girlfriend (who I hadn't seen in nearly a week because of my obsessive need to sail a sinking ship) and we had a rom com marathon complete with Ben and Jerry and Pringles.

I literally wrote the song and the melody in my head while I looked down at Spencer's adorable movie watching face. A combination of concentrated and amused it was so cute, again I am a badass I swear.

Back to the point, I'm sat in a gorgeous hotel suite at the top of one of the fanciest hotels in New York having a mental breakdown. You see throughout this entire process I planned every moment down to the last minute, every foreseeable problem has a contingency plan except for one.

What if she says no!

Closing my eyes I tried to imagine how I would feel if Spencer looked down at me and said that disgusting word. I freaking welled up, that's how bad that would be. The sound of my phone ringing broke me out of my funk and I picked up without looking at the caller id.

"Lo." I answered distractedly.

"_Hey sis what's with the lateness?"_ Kyla asked seemingly very calm, I glanced at my watch and flipped out.

"Holy shit I'm on in three hours." I shouted into Kyla's expectant ear. New York traffic is a killer.

"Be cool, be cool Ash there's a car waiting for you downstairs, just move your ass and you'll be fine mmkay." Kyla said cool as a cucumber.

"I'm moving." I said taking one second at the door to breathe before sprinting to the lift.

**SPOV**

Ashley's freaking me out. There's really no other way of putting it, either she's finally gone nuts or something's up. I for one want to believe it's the latter but right now it could go either way. Phone calls at odd hours of the day, quick kisses before she sprints to 'work', I thought she already had an album out and a tour to do but who am I to question it.

If I didn't trust her implicitly and know she loves me with all her heart I would think she was cheating. In fact there was a small niggle in the back of my mind that something was up and the night she spent five rom com's worth of time staring at me confirmed it. That was only two weeks ago and I'm sitting here in my girlfriend's dressing room thinking about it.

I looked at my watch and shook my head wondering where on earth Ashley could have got to. Five hours ago she said she had to sort something and left me in our hotel room. I met up with Glen and Aiden for a bit but there's only so much you can see in New York if you already lived there for years. So I headed to the venue with Kyla an hour ago and she set me up with the TV in Ashley's dressing room.

Unbeknownst to Kyla my rather large handbag did not contain random items, instead I brought along my brand new Victoria's secret lingerie set and fuck me heels. I wanted to make New York extra special for both of us seeing as this is where we first met a second time. The second I had started thinking special my mind conjured up about a thousand fantasy dates but this one particular fantasy has me quivering at the thought. I hope it does the same the Ash when she realises it.

Lying here on the sofa watching desperate housewives is not how I thought I would spend the three hours before Ash had to perform. My suspender clips were starting to dig in painfully and I was contemplating stripping off and changing back into my jeans when Ash burst through the door and ran into the bathroom stripping off her top on the way there.

I sat there stunned thinking she hadn't realised I was here but I saw her naked back freeze right after her bra fell away. She took comically tentative steps backwards until she was opposite me in only her jeans and trainers. The look of pure unadulterated lust on her face as her eyes scanned my body was enough to get me wet but I decided a little teasing was in order, we had time.

"Where have you been?" I asked putting my sternest frown on and spinning around to stand up and face her. Her jaw went visibly slack as I stood to my full height which in these beauties is 5'11 at least; I towered over her watching as flames flickered in her eyes.

"Well?" I demanded as I traced a finger slowly from her shoulder down between her breasts over her abs and back. She actually leant into the tiny touch while her eyes roamed all over my body. Want was probably pouring out of my eyes so I used my free hand to tilt her chin up and caught her eyes with mine.

"I was..." She faltered as I flicked a finger into her jeans waistband, I smiled in what I hoped was a sexy way.

"You were?" I asked coyly, inwardly chuckling at the stunned expression she wore while I deftly undid the button on her jeans. I waited for my answer before I would go any further.

"S-sleeping." She stuttered and I almost laughed at her embarrassment. Instead I rewarded her by dragging her zipper down. Her jeans slipped down her hips a little and my eager hands quickly grasped her jutting hip bones. Massaging her gently with my thumbs I felt her hands grip my sides as she whimpered.

"Would you say you wasted _valuable_ time?" I continued not giving in even though her hips were rolling towards me temptingly as she tried to get closer to my body; I admired the effort and stopped holding her at bay.

Nodding frantically she pulled me into her and attacked my lips with a growl. I melted as the warmth of her embrace spread through me, making my core throb needily. Her hands travelled quickly up my ribs and she rubbed her thumbs over my nipples at the same time as her tongue swiped my bottom lip.

I moaned loudly into her mouth as our tongues battled wantonly, I loosened my tight grip on her hips and ran my hands sensually over her lower abdomen before pushing her jeans down roughly. She squeaked in surprise at the sudden cold on her legs but kicked the jeans away.

Running my hands teasingly up her inner thighs I stopped just short of where she wanted me rubbing slow circles into the tense muscles which twitched under my ministrations. A sudden pain erupted in my lip and I jerked my head back and opened my eyes to find black eyes boring into mine. I smirked at her, I had awoken the beast and I knew I would enjoy what came next.

"You're such a fucking tease Spence." Ashley said her voice low and husky. She backed me up towards the sofa but stopped halfway there staring at something on the floor.

The grin on my face could probably rival the Cheshire cat right now and I manoeuvred my thigh in between Ashley's to see if my other little surprise had worked. I groaned when I felt just how wet she was. I was close to my limit on the teasing my body aching for her to touch me more, I needed Ashley and I needed her now.

Breaking roughly away from her I hooked my fingers around her panties and yanked them down loving how they glistened in the soft light, I almost smelled them I was that desperate. I looked up without thinking and got an eyeful of the whole of Ashley's beautiful body, something I loved to worship; if I thought it would catch on I would start a religion.

I leant forward to taste her but she seemed to have other ideas. Before I knew it I was being lifted up and whirled around, I wrapped my legs around Ashley and involuntarily canted my hips. Wetness meet abs. We moaned out at the same time and she placed me down on the make-up table before fixing me with a seductive smirk. I licked my lips as I admired her body and noticed she looked just as desperate as I felt. Once we got going this would not take long.

Surprising me with her patience in such fiery conditions her eyes travelled ever so slowly down my torso, though they stopped abruptly when she saw my panties. My _crotchless_ panties that is. Looking back up at me quickly I gave her a look that said 'Fuck me or I will do it myself', she definitely got the message.

I felt the cold air hit me as she sped to the other side of the room to grab the strap on I had snuck into my bag. I watched as she pulled up the harness and pumped the 7inch blue phallus to check it was in place. From the moan that one movement got I'd say it was.

"_Ash_ I need you." I whined surprising even myself at how needy I sounded. Ashley's eyes snapped to mine her hand still around the fake cock as the stalked towards me. The look in her eyes let me know that I was in for it, big time.

"I don't know how the fuck you managed this but you are so sexy!" She exclaimed huskily as she rubbed the head of her cock over my core making me squirm desperately in an attempt to get closer. She pinned me to the cold mirror with her strong torso and kept her whole body stock still while she took off my bra. The anticipation was literally killing me she was wound like a spring ready to surprise me at any moment.

"_Fuck!"_ I shouted as her hot mouth enveloped my already stiff nipple at the same time as she thrust her whole seven inches into me roughly. My eyes snapped shut and I literally saw stars when she pulled back out and thrust in again even harder than before.

Losing all dignity I cried out constantly as she pounded roughly into me, paying equal attention to both of my nipples and scratching down my stomach in the way that she knows drives me fucking crazy. I turned into a quivering mess underneath her and I felt her smirk against my neck as she moved her tongue over my now sweaty skin. My hips pumped upwards to meet every hard thrust and I felt myself getting closer and closer to the edge as she got closer and closer to my lips.

"So close." I moaned clinging on to her for all I was worth.

Out of the blue she changed her rhythm from frantic and hard to slow and firm, I dug my nails into her shoulder blades to let her know my 'displeasure' at her underhand tactics. I hate to be denied and she knows it.

I didn't know she was there until I felt her warm breath hit my ear and I squirmed madly at the mix of sensations accidentally throwing her off her rhythm a little. I felt her back tense up underneath my palms and I smirked knowing that the insert had hit her just right and she was going to have to stop if she wanted me to cum first, which she always did.

"That's for biting my lip." I whispered into her ear as she panted heavily into mine. I didn't care that the move had but unintentional I was going to use it regardless. What I didn't expect was for her to pull out of me completely, leaving me feeling dreadfully empty and unfulfilled. I whined pathetically and she chuckled darkly into my waiting ear. I tried to use my legs to pull her back into me but her hips were too strong I was on the verge of begging and I'm sure she knew it.

"You came here wanting me to fuck you, so let me fuck you Spencer." She said cockily into my ear, I moaned out at her words feeling her tip slide along my centre teasingly. She is way too good at this. All my pride flew out the window. I nodded and connected our lips in a deep kiss letting my primal instincts take over. I could feel my hips trying to take Ashley back in but she still wouldn't enter me. I growled into her mouth and almost nipped her lip with how frustrated I was getting.

"Someone's impatient now." Ashley said against my parted lips and I thought for sure I would be rewarded for my silence but no, she pulled swiftly away and I whimpered at the loss. I wasn't left hanging for long because as soon as I whimpered I found myself being manhandled to my feet and spun around to face the mirror.

A sharp pain hit my ass and I yelped feeling my senses heighten and my pleasure increase to levels I did not think were possible. Without any prompting from my insanely hot girlfriend I bent over and place my hands on the makeup table positioning myself for her.

"So fucking hot." Was the last thing I heard from Ashley before I was being taken roughly from behind moaning from the first hard pump of Ashley's hips. She hit places inside me that I didn't know were there and I screamed out loud when she touched her index finger to my clit and nipped at my shoulder blade.

"Oh god. Fuck!" I heard from behind me and I opened my eyes to look into the mirror I'd forgotten was there. Her dark hair tousled against her neck and chest glistening with exertion along with her swirling orbs sent waves of pleasure crashing over me. A split second later I came hard with Ashley's name on my tongue while looking straight into her dark eyes. Try as I might I couldn't keep my eyes open against the feelings because she kept up her fast pace despite the fact that I was turning extra sensitive.

My moans somehow increased in volume and pitch as she ordered me to cum again pinching my nipples between each thrust. I felt my body overload with pleasure and the coil inside snapped again sending me into a whirlwind of bliss. She followed me soon after with several more hard thrusts and a loud cry of my name.

We stayed where we were for several moments just looking at each other and catching our breath only breaking apart when Ashley pulled out of me gently and moved to release the harness. Moving faster than my still shaky legs would like I spun around and lifted her hands away from the leather before undoing it all myself. It was so much more personal that way, the little shivers that ran through her as my fingertips traced little patterns over her skin made me smile.

In turn she helped me out of my now ruined lingerie, totally worth it I might add, and we settled onto the sofa lying down with my head on her chest and her arms around me. I listened to her heart as it slowed gradually back its normal rhythm and sighed contentedly when she stroked her fingers through my mussed hair untangling it tenderly.

Her phone ringing in her jeans broke us out of our little bubble and I reached down to the floor without moving anything but my arm and fumbled around for the annoying square of plastic I wanted to crush. Finally finding it I handed it to Ash and went back to my comfy snuggling while I listened to Ashley's side of the conversation.

"Hello."...

"Ky? Why are you calling me?"...

"You knocked?"...

"Uh huh, uh huh."...

"Yeah we were busy."...

"I'm glad you got that I don't think you'd have wanted to walk in." She said and I could hear the proud smile on her face.

"Ha if you had my girl you'd be loud too bitch, what's up anyway?"...

"An extra hour, Ky I love you! Okay bye." She exclaimed happily before hanging up and chucking her phone back to the floor.

"Hey Spence guess what?" She said excitedly sounding like a little kid at Christmas.

"Hmm." I managed to get out through my comfortable haze I swear I'm still up in the clouds somewhere that's just what she does to me.

"Someone started a fight outside so we get an extra hour while they sort everything out and get the support band to perform!" She told me kissing the top of my head. I chose to ignore the fact that people had been fighting at an Ashley Davies concert, probably a jealous girlfriend issue.

"That's so awesome." I mumbled into her right boob enjoying the feel of the naked skin against my lips.

"It so is, this is perfect." She said happily and I was inclined to agree but all I could manage was a nod, she laughed at me. "What did I do to you Spence you're half dead?" She joked but I moaned slightly to shut her up.

"I got what I wanted." I said taking full credit for the great dressing room sex we'd just had and she scoffed.

"You planned everything so well but you forgot to tell me about it." She said indignantly.

"True," I chuckled, "You were sleeping." I said sarcastically hoping that she'd realise I know something's up.

"Yup I was knocked out, which reminds me, can I take you on a date after the show tonight?" She asked me sounding almost shy. That certainly got my attention, shy and Ashley do not belong in the same sentence.

I turned my head and propped my chin on her sternum careful not to niggle and bruise her chest.

"You okay Ash; I didn't wanna say anything but you've been weird for a few weeks now?" I asked quietly.

"I was planning this date." She said her voice loaded with an emotion I couldn't put my finger on so I just went with it, she was clearly being honest.

"Then I would be honoured to date you after the show." I said keeping my tone light hearted, I really wanted to know what was so special about this date that it had taken weeks to plan. Anticipation was quickly on its way to making me jumpy already and I wiggled on top of Ashley to show her my excitement but she barely even laughed. Now I really want to know what she was so nervous about. I kissed the frown off of her face until the time came when she had to get ready.

**APOV**

Performing is the one thing that has always been able to clear my mind. There has never been a time or a place where my worries wouldn't phase out once I started to perform. Apparently proposing to the woman I love is not an issue performing can erase.

I damn near bawled my eyes out when I sang ordinary people because my imagination sprinted away with my badassness. The tumultuous applause at the end of the show might've been the loudest I've ever gotten. I think the audience picked up on my need for support right now. I wish it had helped but even as I staggered offstage I could feel everything overwhelming me all at once.

Kyla rushed towards me with confirmation of readiness for my plans to go ahead and my head span dangerously. I really needed to calm down. I tried to speak but found my lungs incapable of exhaling, I desperately tried to drag in air with no success.

"Ash," I heard the concerned voice of my girlfriend as I was pushed into a chair backstage. "Baby what's the matter?" She knelt in front of me and took my clammy hands in hers. By now I was practically hyperventilating and barely coherent, colours and dark spots blinking in my vision.

"Kyla she's panicking grab a paper bag, I'll get her to the car." Spencer's voice sounded shaky but strong and I was so grateful for the strong arms that lifted me. I squirmed from the force of my chest not expanding properly and found a warm dark place to rest my eyes. "Ash c'mon stay awake for me, if you pass out we can't go on that date because I will be dragging you to A&E." My girlfriend told me matter of factly.

I struggled to maintain my composure and counted my short breaths. Soon enough I was sitting in the backseat of our Jeep with my head still resting against Spencer's neck and a paper bag pressed tightly to my mouth. Kyla shot me a questioning look from the open door and I just nodded emphatically trying to convey the go ahead with my eyes.

With Spencer's comforting arm around my back and blunt nails scratching my scalp it didn't take long for me to calm down. Feeling her close to me like this was the one thing I never knew I needed to feel to be sure about my actions tonight. She's beautiful, kind, loving; I could go on for days, I giggled at my own sap feeling my body come back under my full control.

"You're feeling better then?" Spencer asked with a forced smile and I turned my body so I could stare into those baby blues.

"All I needed was you." I said seriously and I think she sensed there was some sort of hidden message because her eyebrows knitted together in puzzlement.

"You sure you're alright, maybe we should just head to the hotel?" She said turning away to signal to the driver but I caught her wrist before she could open the door to get him.

"Nu uh Spence, we've got a date to get to." I smiled hoping she would see that I'm fine.

"Don't you want to shower and change first?" She asked and I looked us both up and down.

She was in simple skinny jeans and a pretty top while I was still in my rocker get up from the show. Her hair was a little mussed, probably from carrying me and I'm certain my makeup is destroyed. We looked so natural and in our element aka together that I could not picture a more perfect state for us to be in for this.

I shook my head at her wordlessly opening my door and pulled us both back onto the street. I smiled nervously (can't get rid of them completely) at Kyla and she dangled the new car keys on her finger temptingly.

"Have fun guys!" She said with a wink at Spencer who was looking more curious by the minute.

"We will." I sang back now fully energised with thoughts of the surprise I have planned. "C'mon Spence." I said and tugged her hand in the direction of another non descript vehicle leaving a grinning Kyla waving excitedly after us.

"Ash is the blindfold really necessary?" Spencer deadpanned turning her head towards me.

"You've never complained about it before babe." I said innocently but I could practically feel the glare Spence sent my way singe the cloth in front of her eyes. "Yes it is." I sighed. "Stop looking at me like that." I said accusingly feeling the sceptical look she was giving me.

"I love that you know how I'm looking at you without even seeing me." She said dreamily, she's changed her tune.

"I love you too." I laughed as I pulled up to the curb by Moon and saw the little tea lights signalling everything was ready.

Leading Spencer safely to the door I could feel my anticipation build. I pushed open the door and it made a weird noise between a squeak and a creek. Spencer gasped audibly and her head snapped to face where I was. I hung my head disappointedly knowing that she'd already figured out where we were.

I felt her hand squeeze mine reassuringly before I patched up my wounded pride and whipped the blindfold away from her curious eyes. I watched her jaw drop and her eyes roam around the entire bar lit only by tiny tea lights. Both our eyes were drawn the most brightly lit spot. The booth where I had been sitting that first night was decorated with fairy lights and had two dishes on the table covered with the posh metal domes you only see in movies. I smiled, my people really came through.

"Wow Ash this is incredible." Spencer breathed out before she captured my lips with hers for a deep kiss. My chest swelled with love and the knowledge that I'd done something right.

"Let's eat." I suggested once we parted and she nodded happily.

**SPOV**

I thought my night could simply not get any better after our dressing room tryst but I was happily mistaken. The care and attention Ashley had paid to dressing Moon up for our date was so touching, I fell in love all over again when I saw her hopeful smile and sparkling eyes staring into mine.

We spent the whole meal holding hands across the table; I don't even remember what we ate because I was so distracted by her face glowing thanks to the tea lights. She was so beautiful and all I wanted was to hold her and never let go.

The second she placed her cutlery down I hopped around the table and into her side of the booth before she even swallowed her last bite. We giggled together for a while just enjoying each other's presence with no work commitments, only another week in New York with the love of my life to look forward to.

I stroked down her chest and kissed her passionately hoping to convey that I wanted her naked in a hotel room ten minutes ago but she seemed to be ignoring my signals. I needed to be more obvious, I straddled her lap and ground into her drawing out a moan. I nipped down her neck and sucked at her pulse point before tracing back up to her ear.

"I need you now let's go." I whispered my demand running my hands under the hem of her dress. I snapped backwards against the table in shock when she shook her head and caught my wandering hands, bringing them out into the open again.

"Dessert first." She panted and I smiled thinking I could get her to skip it and bent forward to attack her again. She pushed me back with our joined hands and I looked up at her pleading eyes hurt.

"I don't want dessert." I pouted but she just smiled softly at my desperation.

"It's important I promise." She said firmly and motioned for me to move.

I grudgingly stood up letting her grab my hand and lead me through Moons back corridors until we reached a door I had never seen before. I looked at her curiously and opened my mouth to ask. She shook her head and opened it for me a secretive smile on her features.

Inside was a wooden staircase with fairy lights running around the banisters forming a brightly lit path to the unknown? One more excited look at my girlfriend and I leapt into action. I was dying to know what was up here; I'd never even noticed the door.

I could hear her breathing in between my pounding footsteps and she chuckled at my childish enthusiasm.

The air inside the sloping passage got colder and colder until finally I stepped out into the open air. I couldn't help but freeze dramatically in the doorway and take in my surroundings.

I gathered that I was on the roof of Moon; a small stage had been set up at the side in front of a very familiar sofa. I wondered how my sofa had gotten onto the roof but was distracted from my questions by a warm pair of arms wrapping around my middle and soft lips caress my neck.

"You like?" Ash asked against my tingling skin.

"I love!"

"The sofas for you, the stage is for me." She said lightly but I could hear some tension in her voice and her arms tightened a tiny bit.

Turning in her arms I captured her lips in a tender kiss pouring all my love for her though my lips. She backed me up and into the sofa and pulled away before I had the chance to drag her over the arm and on top of me.

"Have a seat." She spoke against my lips before pulling away and making her way to the stage. My body felt cold without her touch.

I sat down with trepidation in the middle of the seat while watching Ash whip a guitar off its stand and make her way to the stool directly in front of me. Looking around the stage I saw there were no amps and definitely no microphones. I felt my heart buzz happily at the knowledge that this mini performance would me for me and me alone.

"I love your smile." I heard and I snapped my gaze to Ashley's. She was giving me that nose crinkling happy grin and I nearly fell apart in its power.

"Not as much as I love your grin." I replied with a small wink and she visibly relaxed I hoped to myself that she wasn't about to panic again just then.

"Anyway, I just wanted to sing you a song I wrote while we, well you were watching movies and I was watching you watch them." She explained letting out a long breath afterwards.

I waited patiently while she got herself situated and breathed deeply a few more times. Once she was settled she flashed me a small smile and began to pick out a melody. A wide smile broke out on my face the second her beautiful voice washed over me.

_Oh yeah yes  
>La da day, la da day<br>La da da da da oh_

_Thinkin' how the story goes_  
><em>You're helpless and I'm wishin'<em>  
><em>Put the film inside my mind<em>  
><em>But there's a big scene that I'm missin'<em>  
><em>As I re-read my lines<em>  
><em>I think I said this, I should've said that<em>  
><em>Did you edit me out of your mind<em>  
><em>'Cos in a flash you had disappeared, gone (gone)<em>  
><em>Before the curtain falls<em>  
><em>And we act this out again<em>  
><em>Maybe I should risk it all and state<em>

_That I'm officially going on the record_  
><em>To say I'm in love with you<em>  
><em>I'm officially everything you hope that I would be<em>  
><em>This time I'll tell the truth<em>  
><em>I'm officially wrong I know<em>  
><em>For letting you go the way I did<em>  
><em>Unconditionally more than I ever was before<em>  
><em>I'm officially yours<em>  
><em>La da day, la da day<em>  
><em>La da da da da oh<em>

_Travellin' down this road again_  
><em>Gotta make a few decisions<em>  
><em>Don't want you to feel this hurt again<em>  
><em>That's why I'm hopin' that you'll listen<em>  
><em>If you let me press rewind<em>  
><em>I'll rehearse every word I should have said<em>  
><em>'Cos girl I'm ready to make things right<em>  
><em>Here on this stage so we can move on (on)<em>  
><em>And before the curtain falls<em>  
><em>And we act this out again<em>  
><em>Missin' pieces I'll resolve so stay<em>

_I'm officially going on the record_  
><em>To say I'm in love with you<em>  
><em>I'm officially everything you hope that I would be<em>  
><em>This time I'll tell the truth<em>  
><em>I'm officially wrong I know<em>  
><em>For letting you go the way I did<em>  
><em>Unconditionally more than I ever was before<em>

_Things I should have said_  
><em>Like I appreciate the time that I spend with you<em>  
><em>Inspire me with the smile I put on your pretty face<em>  
><em>My world comes alive, now I know (now I know it babe)<em>  
><em>This time I'm not letting go<em>  
><em>'Cos I'm officially yours (oh oh)<em>

_Officially everything you hope that I would be_  
><em>This time I'll tell the truth<em>  
><em>I'm officially wrong I know<em>  
><em>For letting you go the way I did<em>  
><em>Unconditionally more than I ever was before<em>

_I'm officially going on the record_  
><em>To say I'm in love with you<em>  
><em>I'm officially everything you hope that I would be<em>  
><em>This time I'll tell the truth<em>  
><em>I'm officially wrong I know<em>  
><em>For letting you go the way I did<em>  
><em>Unconditionally more than I ever was before<em>

_Girl I'm unconditionally yours (oh yeah)_  
><em>Officially yours, your girl(La da day, la da day, la da day)<em>  
><em>Girl I'm unconditionally yours (La da da da da oh)<em>  
><em>Officially yours, I am<em>

_Girl I'm unconditionally yours (listen what I'm tryna say)_  
><em>Officially yours, your girl (oh oh)<em>  
><em>Girl I'm unconditionally yours<em>  
><em>Officially yours, I am<em>

I sat stock still throughout the entire thing just hearing her singing about our story and pulling apart the meaning of her words. She had been sat there unmoving for a couple of minutes since she stopped singing. I resolved to wait patiently for her to speak again she looked like she was in deep thought.

As if she felt my stare on her again she raised her eyes and met my misty ones. I sent her a watery smile letting her know I loved every word even I don't quite get it. I jumped a little when she got to her feet and spoke.

"Spencer I am so unbelievably happy that I belong to you in almost every way," I frowned at the word almost but didn't interrupt, she walked towards me, placing her guitar in the sofa next to me before lacing our fingers on both hands. "In every way that matters I am yours and you know that, and because I love you with everything I am... I want to world to know that."

I'm sure my gulp could be heard as I finally cottoned on to what was about to happen. If I thought she had panicked earlier it was nothing compared to amount of adrenaline that shot into my bloodstream that second. She pulled on my now weak hands and I stood shakily gasping for breath. My mind had gone completely blank as if waiting for her to fill it with her words. She didn't disappoint.

"I love you Spencer Carlin, I say it every day mostly more than once or even twice and you do the same. I've struggled without you but nothing had ever felt better than finding our love again stronger than ever after all those years." I had tears running down my face as she bent down and retrieved a small pair of scissors from her bra. Bending down she slowly cut the strings on her guitar one by one. The sound they made as they snapped away never failed to send a shock through me.

When they had all been sliced Ashley reached inside the hollow body and pulled out a small blue box. My whole world narrowed down to that tiny little item in Ashley's hands and my chest tightened in anticipation as she went down on one knee in front of me.

My hand slapped itself over my mouth smothering the cry that tried to escape when our eyes met and I melted. My knees were weak and my heart was racing at one hundred miles an hour, all I could think about was the girl in below me.

"Spencer Carlin," her voice cracked and she cleared her throat before cracking open the case to reveal a beautiful diamond ring, "I love you and I want to be officially yours. Will you marry me?"

**APOV**

A split second after a said the words I felt every muscle in my body relax out of a tension I didn't know they had. Blood rushed to my head and I fought the nervous dizzy feeling that threatening to consume me. My eyes snapped shut of their own accord as I waited for her answer.

A shot of pure happiness exploded inside me when she spoke one hoarse word.

"Yes."

* * *

><p><em><strong>So who wants to hear about the rest of their weeklife, me feels a sequel coming on, let me know if that'd be somehting you'd read. Even if you say no I'm gonna write the wedding for sure. Oh and the song was Officially Yours - Craig David.**_


End file.

South of Nowhere, Humor, Romance